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by the grit of sandpaper {chapter 3}

Pairing: Jackson! Joel Miller x Patrol Partner! Reader

Chapter Summary: With the overnight patrol behind you, it's now time for your annual leave from the roster altogether. But Joel doesn't know that and you're hesitant to tell him, feeling like it would be the best for you two to get some distance. But as with all things involving the man, it was hard to keep the distance.

Word Count: 7.2k

Warnings: canon typical violence, canon typical language, illusions to past death, illusions to past trauma, blood, hurtful language, town gossip, rumors, negative feelings, pining, heart of gold joel, carpenter joel, woodworking joel, artisan joel, patrol partnership, lots of feelings, slight angst, hurt and comfort, joel miller's hands need their own warning, two (2} instances of joel miller gently touching reader, intentional flirting, unintentional flirting, talk of pregnancy, casual intimacy, urges to kiss joel miller get their own warning, sexual content, masturbation (f and m), yearning, protective joel, tommy is a scheming lil brother and we love him for it, fluff, this is so unbelievably soft, reader is described as smaller than joel (bc c'mon), reader has a commonly used nickname but no assigned name, joel and reader pov

A/N: i'm not really back in wake of some bad comments and confrontational haters, but love y'all ♡

ao3 link || series masterlist || main masterlist || ko-fi

A knock on your door the next morning caught you bundled up and out in the backyard, the sound echoing throughout your empty house. It was small: a simple one with a larger than average kitchen, a living room, one bathroom across the hall from the bedroom, and a laundry / mudroom with a deep utility sink and a few cabinets of storage. It’s where you kept the tools for the garden, where you washed and prepped everything you managed to grow before moving it into the kitchen space. But you were on the modest back porch, a cup of steaming coffee cooling in the early morning air as you looked out at the trees that took up a good chunk of the large area.

Dragging your eyes from the one that looked like it was about at the end of its life, a large crack running down through the trunk, you heeded the knock at the early hour. Knowing it could only be one of four people.

“Was worried I woke you for a moment, you sleep okay?” Maria greeted you as she waddled past you and moved into the kitchen. She spied the other cups worth of contents in the coffee maker and sighed in longing. The scent of it heavy in the air, mixed with cinnamon you were apt to put in with the grounds before brewing. But her sigh turned into a delighted hum as she shifted her attention to the cooling pan atop the stove and moved closer to inspect the baked goods settled on it.

“Probably not much better than you, momma. How you feelin’?” You slid a plate to her as she began to pick pieces off from one of the flaky breakfast hand pies you had made. She placed the one she had begun eating along with another before following you to the large table that ran through the middle of the room. Setting it down and pulling out the chair for her, you helped her to lower into it. With a caressing touch to her swollen belly, permission given from her months ago, you began to set up a kettle for some tea.

“Big.” She stuffed a large bite into her mouth, eyes fluttering at the taste of the filling. Crumbs of the flaky crust sticking to the front of her shirt, jacket having been shrugged off. “Olive, these are fantastic. Is there anything in here I shouldn’t be eating?”

“I wouldn’t have let ya get your hands on it if that were the case. Just bacon and onion jam, eggs, a little bit of milk, and a whole bunch of thyme. Nothing too bad.”

“Nothing too bad, my ass. You should totally make these for the mess hall on your next shift.”

Another knock on the front door stole the words from your mouth and you looked to the woman who all of a sudden had great interest in picking the crumbs from where they had fallen.

“Maria, what is this?”

“Can’t I call on a fellow morning bird without ulterior motives?”

“You could, but you didn’t this time around. I don’t get many visitors so I wonder who you- Oh! Good mor-morning, Joel.” Surprise overtook you as you were suddenly face to face with the man over the threshold of your front door. He was bundled up as well, though his hair was wet, slicked back and shining in the early morning sun peeking over the mountains.

“I just figured we could all chat about the Teton route.” Maria’s voice carried from the kitchen. But it didn’t break the stare you could feel as Joel’s eyes took in the apron you had thrown on earlier.

“Mornin’.” He rumbled, a hand reaching out from within his jacket pocket to swipe at your cheek. His touch burned, but you were frozen in place at such a forward action so early in the day. Lips parting as you tried to pull in a breath but you were sure all you managed to do was huff out what air was already in your lungs. “You got a lil flour or somethin’.”

“O-oh, um, thank you.” His hand lingered, the back of his knuckle dragged down your cheek and then the finger curled around the neckline, tugging slightly. Nerves sparkling as you felt the warmth from his hand so close to your neck, you could only swallow as his eyes finally met yours with a playful grin displaying that damned, endearing dimple normally hidden in his scruff.

“Never seen you so homey before, it’s a good look on you.” His voice was tipped low, just for you and you felt your stomach lurch. When you didn’t say anything, just continued to stand there caught like a fly in his trap, he chuckled and asked if you were going to let him inside. It was then you realized he had inched closer, crowding you in the doorway, with his hand still around the strap of fabric over your neck.

“Oh! Of cour-course, I’m so sorry. It must be the early hour taking my manners.” But you knew he wouldn’t believe that for a second, he knew you were a morning person. Something you had revealed to him on patrol. Just like he had revealed to you that he took any opportunity to sleep in, apt to hit snooze an embarrassing about of times if the sound even reached him. You had both laughed at the polarizing tendencies, ribbing each other about it throughout the day. It had been a good one, free of the underlying…tension of whatever had shifted when you had pressed your lips to his injuries. Something you would take back if it meant cutting the undercurrent of whatever had befallen your interactions.

“There’s, um, breakfast hand pies and one last serving of coffee,” You spoke as you turned your back on him and went to retrieve your own mug from the porch.

After the shuffle of greetings, of ushering Joel to take a seat at the table. You plated up two of the hand pies and poured the last of the coffee for him, setting it down in front of him with a small smile before fetching the whistling kettle and preparing a cup of tea for Maria who was already a bite into her second pastry.

“Now, the horse you two lost.”

Joel made a surprised sound, mouth biting into one of the pastries on his plate.

“It was my fault.” You rushed out before Joel could even respond around his mouthful. His eyes flicked to you across the table where you had finally taken a seat, watching as you willingly took the blame for the unfortunate event. “I wasn’t quick enough taking down the Infected that were coming at us. Two of them had set their sights on her, with all the noise she was making while another went after Joel on the ground.”

“And there was no use of anything other than the shotgun?”

“That’s correct.”

“Joel, do you agree with her synopsis?”

“Yes. She acted fast, but there was no way Kiana was gonna make it back, she had been freaking out the second they came outta the tree line, most likely would’ve run off.”

“She always was easy to spook, that’s why she was designated as your horse, calmed her down and got her to focus.” It made sense, Joel was a very level headed person, capable of gently focusing someone should their minds or attention wander.

“I wish every incident discussion was this lovely. No arguing, good food, people who don’t want to go around in circles. You two are truly one of the best pairs we have on the roster.” Maria stirred in a bit more honey into her tea, taking a sip as she looked you both over.

A nervous laugh bubbled up from you as you dug into your own pastry, unaware of them sharing a look.

“This is amazing,” Joel offered, reaching for the kitchen towel folded atop the table to clean his hands off. “You should make these your next shift at the mess hall.”

“I just told her that, imagine the buzz they would cause.”

“They’re not all that special.” You muttered, shoulders rising as you felt rather put on the spot.

“This filling, these onions? It had to have taken a lot of concentration to reduce them down so soft but not mushy. Take the credit where it’s due.” Joel hummed his agreement as he reached for his mug.

“You’re off patrol this week and next, to do your annual thing.” Tommy announced as he sat beside you, his tray thudding against the top of the table, laden down with food from this mornings offerings.

“I can still patrol and get what I have to done.” You didn’t look up from the notebook you were writing in, trying to map out the way you were going to turn the harvest of the olive trees in your backyard into. If you were being honest, patrol twice a week wasn’t so bad with the added allure of Joel Miller. But it would be hard to juggle it paired with the time of year. Every autumn you took out your dirtiest, most ratty pair of overalls and got to work picking the fruit from the trees. Taking your time to sort them, wash them, turn them into oil and pickle some of the others. It was just you, hands aching at the end of the day from spending it all at your kitchen table with various tools. But you wouldn’t trade it for the world.

The kitchen was your happy place. Even after the end of the world. Or maybe in spite of it.

But this year, you didn’t want to miss out on patrol, normally taking the two weeks off to sort everything out and give all your attention to the gift of fruiting trees. Even if…you felt like it would be good for you to get some space from the man you felt in every other thought. The past two weeks had yielded quiet patrols, just the passing of a thermos between hands. You were sure you had overstepped a line by pressing your lips to his face, lost in the moment of adrenaline and want after those Infected had tried to turn you both.

His eyes were heavy on you when he thought you weren’t looking, but searching for what you didn’t have the faintest clue. Perhaps he was thinking of a way to bring it up and let you down gently. Tell you that he hadn’t appreciated your affections that way. Whatever went on behind that handsome, rugged face you hadn’t a clue.

“We both know that’s a mighty lie,” He stuffed an overfull spoon of grits into his mouth, humming around it as he pointed the utensil at you. “Didn’t you say this would be the last year for one of them?”

Sighing, you set the pencil you had been writing with down. Trading it for the cup of coffee in front of you.

“Unfortunately, the trunk spilt when we had those winds come through in February. I’m surprised it bloomed any fruit to be honest.”

“It’s a fighter, like it’s caretaker.”

“Oh hush, tryna flatter me.”

“Don’t you know it.” He winked, cheeky smile growing wider underneath his mustache as his eyes caught sight of something over your shoulder. You were about to turn to see what had him so delighted when a pair of hands placed a tray right next to you. The burly form of Joel huffed as he settled into the seat beside you.

“Mornin’.” He greeted, placing plate of toast in front of you, his hand momentarily brushing against yours before he dug into his own food. You felt heat bloom up your neck and across your cheeks as Tommy feigned a cough to cover up a snicker. Joel leveled an unimpressed stare at the man, an eyebrow cocked and a warning in his eyes. You pretended not to see it, busy slathering a piece of the gifted toast with some butter left out on the tables for the breakfast service.

“Good mornin’, brother.” Tommy lilted, face lit up with something you were hesitant of. Scheming, the man was scheming, up to absolutely no good. And you had a hunch it involved not only you but the man beside you. Taking a bite of the toast, you noticed the way his face twitched before he started whatever he was up to. “How are you today?”

“Fuck off, Tommy.” The older man didn’t even look up from his plate, knowing from years of experience that his brother was aiming a mischievous look his way. “I gotta list a mile long of stuff to do this week and next, don’t have time for whatever else you’ve taken on.”

“That’s a shame,” He took another heaping bite, chewing it thoughtfully as he looked between you both, taking in the way neither of you were willing to look at the other. “Sorry, Olive. Looks like you’ve gotta fell that tree on your own.”

“That’s okay. I’m a big girl, did it the year before last and I’ll do it again this time around.” You downed the last two gulps of your coffee. Gathering up your notebook, you shoved out of your chair and stood, preparing to walk away. But he scrambled, quick on his feet and determined. Joel glanced at you, a parting nod the only indication from him.

“Well, seeing as you’ll be off patrol the next two weeks, that should give you enough time to take care of it.”

“Tommy!” You whirled around on your heel, eyes wide. You hadn’t wanted Joel find out this way, from his trouble making little brother with you right beside him.

“What’s he talkin’ about?” Joel turned with a loaded fork halfway to his mouth. Forgotten in wake of the sudden news. He looked taken off guard, shock coloring his features as he looked to you for answers.

“Didn’t she tell you, brother?” Tommy set his own fork down, tray nearly empty now. “Olive always takes this time of year off to tend to the trees. Harvest and make that lovely oil you see everywhere around town.”

“That’s yours?” His eyes danced around the mess hall, taking in the incriminating glass jars atop every other table. The light green contents revealing the literal fruits of your labor. The hours you would spend hunched over your own kitchen table working away on ensuring everything was perfect. He looked down to the warm plate of food in front of him, the roasted potato hash and scrambled eggs. “You’re the reason the town has cooking oil?”

“Yes, it is.” Feeling pleasure flutter at his impressed tone, you knew your voice had taken on a breathy quality. If Tommy’s growing grin was any indication, his teeth sparkling as he watched the two of you across from him. Joel had turned completely in his chair to face you, while you had pivoted your body in his direction. Both of you undoubtedly drawn to each other even in the most casual of ways.

“What are you gonna do with the wood? Didn’t you burn it and mix the ashes into the soil last time?”

“Yes, I did.” You gripped the notebook tight, fingers aching from the pressure. “It helped to reduce the acidity of the soil and ward off slugs from targeting the blooms once spring came around.”

“Well, uh, I can come by and lend a hand. If you needed it, but I don’t want to intrude if you’ve got it all under control.” Joel ran a wide palm over the back of his head, fingers brushing through the curls as he offered his help in a round about way. Something you suspected Tommy had anticipated. It took you a second to process his words, remembering the feel of his hair tangled around your own fingers. It had been soft despite a days’ worth of travel and an overnight stint atop a dusty mattress. You wondered how he cared for it, what it looked like slicked back fresh from the shower, water dripping from the ends of it and-

“Oh, that’s okay!” You shuffled on your feet, shaking the rather intrusive thoughts and not wanting to burden the man with another task. “You just said you’ve got a lot to do, don’t want to add to it.”

“I could shuffle a few things around, clear up an afternoon to come help ya out.” He insisted, something smoldering in his dark eyes. His tongue ran over his bottom lip as he regarded you carefully, as if he had noticed the lingering gaze on his movement. He shifted to pull that damned little note pad of his own from his back pocket and flipped it open. Looking over the long list penciled on the page.

“No, no, it’s okay, really. You don’t have to do that, Joel.” You waved your own notebook at him, hoping he realized you kind of wanted the space from him. Kind of needed it, actually. To get the image of his softened face out of your head and the ability to look at him without feeling a jolt of desire strike through your body. Space would probably be good, would allow you to reign everything in and be better equipped to ride alongside him once again. The lines had begun to blur and they needed to be defined.

“It’s no problem, I can-“

“It’s really okay, I can handle it. But uh- th-thanks for the offer.” You scurried away before he could add your name to the list among his other tasks. “More important stuff to tend to than a me-measly tree.”

“I really don’t’-“

“I’ve got it.” You called over your shoulder, leaving the two men to their breakfast.

The second you were walking through the door, Joel rounded on the younger man. The shit-eating smirk was securely in place among his brother’s features across the table. Irking Joel further.

“Shut up.”

“Oh brother, you got it bad.”

“Shut up, Tommy.”

“C’mon, she could really use the help. It’s just her.”

“No one offers to pitch in? The other women with personal gardens all help each other out.”

“It’s the age gap. Olive’s about a decade or so younger than them.”

Joel contemplated his brother’s words, thinking back on the thinly veiled disdain Marsha had voiced to him the last time he had been tending to the woman’s home. He knew you were younger, but he hadn’t anticipated it causing any problems with the rest of the settlements occupants just how it wasn’t the cause of any between you and him. At least, not any real problems. Age was just a number nowadays, if you were alive, you were alive. If you weren’t well, you weren’t. Friendships and connections blooming between people regardless of age and backgrounds in abundance as people clung to what they could in order to survive.

“Does anybody ever…talk about her to you?”

Shifting from annoying little brother to something more serious, Tommy looked over his brother as he chewed the bite he had just taken.

“What do you mean?”

“Marsha seemed to insinuate that Olive is common topic of discussion.”

“Marsha doesn’t like Olive. Never has.” Tommy scowled, stabbing at a chunk of potato rather harshly.

“Does it have to do with the patrol you won’t tell me about?”

“…yeah.” Tommy was suddenly very interested in the rest of his food, ignoring the look he could feel Joel pinning him with from across the table.

“Tommy.”

“Her old patrol partner was someone she showed up with, when we first brought her here. He and Marsha’s daughter got on quickly, were engaged within a year and planning on havin’ a kid or two.”

Joel was silent as he picked at his food. Marsha’s daughter, Millie, didn’t have any kids or a husband that he knew of. The two women sharing a home close to his.

“They blame her for what happened.”

“What did happen?”

“Joel, you’ve gotta ask your girl that. It’s not my place to give details.”

“She’s not my girl.”

“But you want her to be, c’mon, I can see it plain as day.”

“We are not talking about this.”

“I think she likes you back. But it’s hard to tell since she doesn’t get a lot of interaction around town aside from when she’s trading or cookin’.”

“She don’t like me like that. We’re just…friendly.”

It wasn’t friendly the way Joel took advantage of any reason to touch you. From soothing minor injuries, to brushing his fingers over yours as he passed you something, to brushing things you tended to smear along your cheek. Just to hear the hitch of your breath and to witness the way your eyes widened. It wasn’t friendly the way you were the last thing he thought of at night and the first thing he thought of when he woke up. It wasn’t friendly the way his gaze lingered on you while out on patrol or when he caught sight of you around town.

It wasn’t friendly the way he spent hours in his workspace sketching out designs and carving into wood in the hopes that you would enjoy what he was creating.

It wasn’t friendly the way he didn’t engage with you for worry of making you nervous, like he noticed he had begun to do. Stuttering every other word around him and others in a habit he couldn’t figure out was his fault or something you were just prone to do. It wasn’t friendly how he wanted to see if it was just him that caused it, wanted to see how quickly words would fail you completely if he were to focus his attention on you in a more than friendly way…

But his brother didn’t know anything about that.

Never one to miss out on the chance for a slow morning, you allowed yourself to wake up naturally.

The sun was just beginning its descent from the highest point in the sky, peeking in through the drawn blinds of your bedroom.

Your body was warm underneath the covers, sleep making your mind take the sensation and let it influence your dreams.

A large body hovered over you, looming like the mountains around the settlement. Protective, a sight to behold at any time of day, as steady as the day turns to night. But the body was so much closer, pressing your back down into the mattress, making your head spin with the heady feel of it.

Thump, thump, thump.

Heart beating hard as pleasure coursed through your veins, brought to life by the feeling of fingers smoothing over your skin. Trailing down over your belly button and through course hair to find your slick folds. Delving between them, parting them, caressing over your fluttering core and then in, producing an obscene sound as they filled you up. Another set of fingers gentle nudging that little bundle of nerves to light your body up even further, heat encompassing you, suffocating you as they quickened their pace.

Thump, thump, thump.

Your heartbeat was harsh in your ears, roaring loud and with a jolt, you realized it wasn’t your heart. It was the sound of someone knocking on your front door.

Eyes flying open, the phantom sensations of being pinned down, of thick fingers caressing the most intimate parts of your body, of the rasped-out nickname in a voice that wasn’t real were ripped from you. You were alone in your bed, your hands the only ones bringing you pleasure.

“Olive?” The faint call of that deep voice your mind had tried to convince you was whispering sweet nothings in your ear was down the hall and on the other side of your front door.

What was Joel Miller doing calling on you in the middle of the day, effectively splashing a bucket of cold water over you as you realized you had been fantasizing about him as you touched yourself.

Embarrassment and guilt squashed the pleasure that had been consuming you, lingering tingles making it hard to clear the fog of your sleep hazed mind. Throwing on the robe hanging on the back of your bedroom door, you took a deep breath to steady yourself before approaching the door he knocked on again.

He must’ve been preparing to walk off when you swung your door open, his back to you and a hand on rubbing on the back of his neck. He turned back at the sound, eyes taking in the disheveled form you were sure you made in your doorway. It was the afternoon, and here you were in a robe and hardly anything else, being pulled from your bed.

“Oh, hey- you were sleeping.” His eyes quickly averted, a hand waving at you as a blush crept up along the apples of his cheeks. You wondered what had him so flustered, his hands clenching and unclenching just below the sleeves of his jacket.

“I should’ve been up already, it’s okay.” You said quietly, taking in the bulk of him on your small stoop. It was a little disorienting, mind imagining him and now being faced with him so close. “D-did you need-“

“Was coming by to see if you needed any help with taking down that tree Tommy mentioned.”

You fell silent at the way he cut you off, his words low like your own, as if he was frustrated.

“Cause if you did all you had to do was ask.”

“I-I didn’t want to add to your list, that little notepad is always so full of-“

“I offered too and you said no. But you’re not even doing what you took the time off for.”

“Excuse me?” You leaned back from him, worry and your own annoyance flaring. Just because you took one morning to yourself didn’t mean you were shirking your responsibilities. His words hitting too close to the wound that everyone else’s had dug close to your heart.

“You take the time off every year, which you didn’t tell me about. Tommy blurted it out to get some sort of satisfaction out of your miscommunication and you’re not even taking care of the trees.”

“Joel-“

“You know what, just, never mind. I’m heading around back to take care of it for you. Go back to bed.”

And then he was stomping down the steps and rounding the side of your house. The gate creaking open to signal his entrance to your backyard.

“Well, excuse the fuck outta me, Mr. Miller.” You mumbled as you shut the front door and moved back to the bedroom. Dressing in a ratty pair of jeans and a long-stained t-shirt in a rush. Putting up your hair as you walked into the back room to retrieve the axe he would need for the work he took it upon himself to do.

It was hard not to stare, your eyes glued to the man as he expertly wielded the axe and chopped down the damaged olive tree. He had shrugged off his flannel after trimming it of the few branches that stretched from the trunk, leaving him in just the t-shirt he donned underneath. A crisp white that displayed the sweat on the small of his back and between his broad shoulders. A crisp white that displayed the bulge of his biceps as he worked. A crisp white that fell just over his waist and billowed up to catch on the spiral top of his notepad peeking out from his back pocket. A crip white that now displayed his rather toned backside to you free from obstruction…

Shaking your head, you continued to pick the fruit from the others. There were three rows of about ten trees, the one you were worried about in the middle of it all. Your movements made you feel like you were slowly circling around him, honing in on the man taking out whatever frustrations he had on the plant. Until everything was gathered, and you retired back inside as the sun beat down what little warmth it still had this late in the season.

The fruit was already washed in the utility sink, resting in strainers set over ratty towels to dry atop the long table in the middle of the room. A record played in the living room, soft guitar and brass filling the space.

Sighing, you poured yourself a few fingers of whisky and then a few into a second glass as you heard the thud of the axe being set against the wall in the back room and steps heading your way.

“Joel, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I didn’t know how.” You offered one of the glasses to him, taking in the way he swiped at his sweating forehead with the back of his arm.

“I know…I’m-I shouldn’t have come at you like that. I’m sorry too.” His fingers brushed yours as he took the peace offering. But he didn’t drink until you lifted your own glass and clinked it to his. “Just…wanted there to be a reason why you weren’t by my side for a little bit.”

Stepping forward to run a hand down from his shoulder to elbow in a comforting move, you motioned him to follow you.

Through the hours of the afternoon and into the evening, you explained the difference between the colors of the fruit. The flavor profiles of each, of how you always sorted even portions of the harvest out for oil, for pickling, for the raw fruit to be shared with the town. You walked him through the process of turning a small batch into a paste, straining it over and over again to produce the oil. Two pairs of hands slick with it as he helped you after he had asked how you managed to do it.

He had asked of your knowledge, prompting you to admit that it was all learned since arriving here and being assigned to the house with the trees in the backyard. That it hadn’t been something you carried with you beforehand. You asked after his woodworking, how it had turned into crafting small figurines.

And he answered much the same as you. Learned skills to help deal with and adapt to the slower way of life Jackson allowed you both to lead.

“You left one on the table.” His voice was right behind you, having followed you into the backroom. You turned to look at him over your shoulder before going back to placing the jars in your hand into a battered plastic crate. One was for the pickled and general olives, while another was for the oil you would make once the distraction of Joel Miller was gone from your kitchen. The only evidence of such from today’s activities in his hand.

“Oh, that one’s for you.”

“I couldn’t, you need it for trade. Everythin’ helps.”

“I insist, it’ll be good to have in your kitchen.”

“It’s just gonna sit there on the counter beside the stove.”

“Well, take it. Just in case.” You whispered. Noticing how close he had gotten in an attempt to hand the jar to you. He was close enough to smell the way the olive leaves had permeated his clothing. The perfume of the freshly chopped wood stained his skin in a heady way. You felt the counter dig into your hips, having unconsciously backed into it beside the deep sink.

“In case of what, sweetheart?” He lowered his voice to a raspy whisper, tongue peeking between his lips as he took in the way you had a smudge of dirt under your eye in the warm light of your kitchen bleeding into the backroom. His gaze snapped to his hand as you bravely tangled your fingers with his own. Feeling your lips curl into a playful smile, you leaned up and whispered into his ear.

“The food critic decides to play personal chef.”

Oh, he liked that. If the widening of his pupils was any indication, the way his breath caught in his throat and he swallowed as he pulled back a little to look over your face.

He leaned in to press a cautious kiss to your cheek, knowing there was no bruise or cut to disguise his move as anything other than the blatant want for it. The soft scratch of his mustache lighting you up.

Your breath fanned out across his face, skin prickling along his body at the warmth of it bouncing back to you. A small huff the only noise coming from you. His eyes flicked up to capture yours, and you felt your heart lurch. He was so handsome, his lips looked so plush and pink this close. There was no way he could’ve missed the way you had glanced down at them, how you were thinking of feeling them pressed to your skin in other places, of the way you pulled your own bottom one between your teeth at the thought.

He leaned in, sharing breath with you, his nose brushing against yours before-

The needle of the record player scratching across vinyl startled you both, jolting in response to the harsh noise breaking the bubble of tension surrounding you both. Your hands had flown up to grip his shoulders tight while his arms had wrapped around your back and pulled you to him. Heart thundering for a completely different reason now, you cast your eyes over his shoulder toward to the record player.

With nervous laughter you stepped away from the man and set about lifting it from the still spinning record. His eyes are on you as you replace the record with another, setting it up to play and then turning back around to him. Your heart still thumping in your chest as you watch him hold tight to the jar in his hand and dip his head to you in a departing bow.

He made sure it was well into the evening before enlisting Tommy’s help. The forlorn way you had looked at the pieces of the tree once it was no longer standing proud among the others had stirred an idea in his mind. He was going to take the thickest part of the trunk, because he wasn’t stealing it away. No. He was going to return it to you once he had cut it into slabs and let it dry. He was going to return it to you in the form of a cutting board, crafted from the beloved trees in your care and in honor of the namesake you’d adapted.

But it had to be perfect. He would practice on other planks and cuts of wood until he was able to craft one that would be good enough for you. Setting his mind and heart on the endeavor.

Once he was back home with the trunk set in room set up as his workspace, stepping out of the shower and collapsing into the bed, he let a lazy smile overtake him.

He may be tired, exhausted beyond his limits. But he wouldn’t have traded his afternoon with you for all the restful sleep in the world.

He couldn’t get the feeling of your lips against his skin out of his mind. The gentle pressure of them grazing over his injuries, the gentle pressure against the patch in his beard he had never been fond of until that moment.

“Fuck,” He groaned out, palm tight around his aching cock. He had woken up thinking of your lips on more of his body, trailing over his skin in sucking kisses, tongue laving at every inch. He had been leaking and hard, his hand around himself before he had even come to complete consciousness.

The very real image of you stood in your doorway clad in nothing but your robe, the way the swell of your breasts was visible with the way you must’ve thrown it on to answer his knocking. The way your eyes were cloudy, slowly clearing and your face slightly flushed, as if you had just been- he groaned deep from within his chest. It had looked like you had just been deep in the throes of pleasure, body overwhelmed with it and torn away by his calling on you. Hair mused and breath a little too quick, he wondered what you sounded like. Would you whimper softly or moan out loudly, would you be shy and cover your face with your arms or would you scramble for any purchase as it raced through your body, swelling up to consume you.

He pumped his hand slowly now, reveling in the feeling stirring low in his gut. The strikes of pleasure moving through him as he recalled the way you had felt against him as you both rode back on your horse.

The way your hip had felt in his hands as he had tried to steady himself. His mind taking the thought and running with it, the imagining the way he would grip you from behind. You down on your hands and knees, legs parted to make room for him to fit between them, thrust against you as deep as he could, your keening-

He choked on his own breath as the sheer force of his release hit him, sudden and overwhelming. Spurts of pearlescent cum coating his hand and dripping over his knuckles.

Euphoria filling him up with satisfaction, his body humming with it until the guilt slammed into him.

He just fucked his fist to the thought of you. His patrol partner. His…friend. The woman he couldn’t get out of his mind even if his life depended on it.

Catching his breath, he looked out the window across from his bed. Stars glittering at him through the curtains as if they know all the dirty things that had just run through his mind, sharing in his secrets.

The only small blessing of his complete lack of self-control and oversight is that he doesn’t have to ride alongside you today on patrol.

“I’ve got the first batch of the season,” You announced as you walked through the doors of the small makeshift market. It was right along the main street, a few fronts down from the mess hall and the Tipsy Bison.

“Oh, lovely!” The man at the back counter praised, clearing a space atop it for you to put down the delivery.

“Marsha.” You nodded toward her in greeting, uncomfortable with the way her eyes had followed you through the few aisles after letting the man go over the contents of the crate. Another nod to her daughter, standing right beside her with a small wicker basket full of root vegetables. “I’ve got a jar in there for you, with the garlic you managed to salvage from the garden.”

She didn’t say anything, looking for all the world like her voice had been stolen from her. A small nudge from her daughter jostled her and she seemed to find it.

“Thank you, Olive. That was…very sweet of you to think of me.”

“Of course, anything to be of help.”

“Yes, of course.” She repeated your words, trailing off as she noticed a figure across the street. Her eyes tracked their movement but when you turned to see what had caught her attention there was no one there. Suddenly she was speaking your actual name and it roused your nerves to life. “You…do so much for the town, I just wanted you to know that we all appreciate the time you take each year to handle the harvest.”

“O-oh, well, um, thank you, Marsha. That’s very k-kind of you to say.”

“Momma,” Millie whispered, taking ahold of the older woman’s arm. Something in her voice you couldn’t quite get a read on. Taking that as your queue to cut off the rather awkward interaction, you waved at them and began to head back up to the counter to collect the items you had requested in exchange for the crate of jars. Your ears were strained, trying to catch the hushed words the women shared behind your back. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“I realized how…unfairly we speak about her. Someone convinced me to apologize to her.”

“She doesn’t deserve apologies, she’s the reason-“

“Millie, we need to work on moving past that. It’s been five years now. We can all live alongside each other with the understanding of what happened.”

“No, momma, you may be ready to forgive her but I’m not. She got my Aiden and I’m not going to let her drag down Joel too.”

“He was the one who told me to be nicer to her, just trying to appease the lovely man.”

Any good feelings of a successful harvest and two weeks of working countless hours to jar, pickle, and transform the fruit from your trees vanished. The awkward yet positive sentiment from one of your more…complicated social connections going down with it at Millie’s angered words. You tried to muster up a smile for the man at the counter, taking the crate back from him with the trade items but you weren’t sure if you were able to. Not turning to look at the women, you exited the shop and made your way straight back home despite the list of errands in your pocket.

Of course Joel had caught wind of the way people spoke of you.

Heard it from Marsha herself, the source of all your troubles despite having done everything in your power to counteract the bad you had brought down on the town with your incompetence. He had put his own reputation at stake by sticking up for you and you only hoped it didn’t affect the way he was received. He was so important to the town, achieving far more than you in what he provided and brought in his skill set.

You didn’t want him to feel even a fraction of what you did as you navigated life here in the settlement. The pitying looks cast your way, the whispered words of what people felt entitled enough to voice, the way you seemed to only be good for one thing and it was the crop in the backyard of the house you had been assigned by pure circumstance.

The crate thudded atop the table where you thrust it harshly, frustration controlling your movements as you moved through the small house back to your room. Shucking off and resisting the urge to hurl your boots toward the closet you sighed as you felt tears prickle your eyes. They rolled hot down your cheeks as you curled up in the covers and gave up on what was supposed to be a good day.

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dividers by the lovely @saradika-graphics and @cafekitsune

taglist: @merz-8 @morning-star-joy @joelsgreys @orcasoul @sawymredfox @sabmat @dreamingofleon @keylimebeag @pascalpvnk @picassopedro @tuquoquebrute @alejaa-a @jessthebaker @littlemisspascal @joeloverture @joelscruff @swiftispunk @tightjeansjavi @undercoverpena @idontknowyou-12345 @corazondebeskar @honeyedmiller @novas-dreamworld @slugz-writes-shit @fluff-lover @hiroikegawa @dugiioh @persephone-girl @furiousmushroom@communism-bitches @formulafun @copperhalfcent @lizlil @hiddenbabynyc

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levilaughlove · 1 month

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☁️► Heads up : M x m romance, cheating/disloyalty, mentions of emotional abuse, manipulation & gaslighting. Reader is taller than Levi by 3 in. Mentions of mental breakdowns & indecent language & ofc, smut.🗞 > Chapter 1 .

""Is this really how low you think of me?", Is what she asked me, Levi, am I the issue?" Your broken voice explains the situation to your longtime best friend, Levi Ackerman.

"I know I shouldn't have came to her like that..I should've been softer." You continued, only lower this time. "You did what you felt was right." Levi finally says. "How much kinder can you be to that self-absorbed bitch? She's drained all of your energy." He adds, hyperfocusing on your sleep-deprived eyes.

"If I showed you photos of what you looked like before you met her, you'd be astonished." He snarls.

"I know you're upset with her but, she is my wife." You defend. "Your wife or your disease?" You chuckle at his snappy remark.

The two of you sit in comfortable silence until your phone begins to vibrate. The device lights up revealing an incoming call. Levi sighs at the name on screen.

"How fucking convenient..." Levi murmurs. You gaze at him pleadingly & he whisps his hand through the air as a sign to answer it. You pick up the phone & accept the call.

"Hello?" You ask.

A muffled female voice could be heard from the other line. She doesn't sound too happy.

Levi's gray eyes glare at the phone ,then, rolls his eyes and falls back onto the bed. "A-alright, (f/n), I'll be home soon. Bye-bye." You quickly end the call.

"What did it say?" Levi asks unenthusiastically. "It? Levi, I know you don't like her but, please..." "I don't care, that's how she treats you, what makes her any better?" He quickly adds. You couldn't argue that.

Levi stares at you with an unexplainable expression in his eyes. "Before you think about going off anywhere, at least eat. She can wait 30 minutes." He says, arising from the bed & leaving the room. You follow quickly behind.

"I've got lots of options, mozzy sticks, mac & cheese, I can make you an egg & bacon sandwich.." He continues. "Egg & bacon sounds nice..." You accept shyly. Levi hums & begins to get the items.

While you waited, you began to think. You were so grateful that Levi still takes care of you, even after all these years. You reminisce on your favorite memory of him. It was bittersweet ,but the love & care you had for one another was evident. You were 4, Levi was 7 & he was moving far from your shared hometown. You were his closest friend & he was yours. On the bridge could be seen young you clinging onto Levi tightly with tears in your innocent eyes. Levi tried to keep a stone face even then but couldn't help how his heart felt.

" I'll be back, this isn't forever...pea. Stop crying.." Levi's voice shakes and he hold yours small body, hesitant to let go. "Why...please stay, I need you here.." Your tears kept flowing down your full cheeks, eyes loosely closed. A woman's voice called for Levi to hurry up. "I gotta go now, kay'?" Levi quickly wipes his tears, giving another attempt at a stone face. "Bye." "Goodbye, pea."

Just the thought of it makes you choked up but it doesn't just have a sad tinge anymore, but an innocent, admirable one. You wonder if Levi remembers that.

"Earth to M/n." Levi says loudly. "Hm? Yeah..." You look down to see Levi had finished making the food. Levi looks concerned for a second before returning back to his ordinary expression. You ended up staying much longer than anticipated. You knew your wife would raise hell once you were home.

"Fuck, it's been 2 hours..." You exclaimed worriedly. "If anything goes down, you could always come to me." Levi says trying to relax you.

You give him a thankful gaze before heading to the front door. Looking back once, you wave to Levi, which he nods to.

You cautiously open the front door to your house.

Your wife is sat on the couch, already meeting eyes with you. She looks furious. "I called you at 2:00 & you're only just getting home at 4!?" She screams then bolts over to you, trying to force intimidation. "Who are you fucking, huh?" She screams again.

"I was at a friend's...(f/n)." You slightly dismiss her and wander off to your shared bedroom, undressing yourself as she follows closely behind.

"So why the fuck couldn't you say so? You need to respect me more! Do you know that at any moment I could fuck you over!? WHO DO YOU THINK THEY'LL BELIEVE?! Me!" She lashes out snatching your phone from your hand, shattering it onto the wooden floor below.

You went into a state of shock, your eyes hyperfocused on her enraged person, everything that wasn't here seemed to look like static. You began to get dizzy. You held your head as you almost lost your footing. Levi, you need Levi. You can't breathe.

You shove past her, she falls to the ground forcefully. You just want to go. You need comfort, why is she like this? This wasn't who she was when you first met her! The rain is heavy outside as you push past the front door and onto the sidewalk, cars rush past you, adding to your anxiety. Your breathing gets heavier and heavier. It's hard to see due to the rain, you're uncomfortable & soaked. The rain wasn't the only thing dampening your face, but your heavy, warm tears.

Finally, the familiar door number 255 came into sight. You banged as hard as you could on the door. Crashes of lightning roar through the sky.

Levi opens the door & your soaked body immediately crashes onto his. He understood without words. You hyperventalate & try to explain but he hushes you, he already knows. Your eyes red & teary holding onto Levi tight, & likewise him to you.

Everything began to fade to nothing.

#levi ackerman smut #gay #lemon #angst #bottom male reader #levi x male reader #levi aot #levi ackerman x male reader

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kcrossvine-art · 1 year

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Heya folks n friends! Today on our LotR cooking series, we're going to be making something inspired by Mrs. Maggot, wife of Farmer Maggot. Originally we were going to do a cream of mushroom soup, but the idea of adding meat as a cheeky lil joke on their last names was too good to pass up. In my mind meat goes better with thin soups than creamy ones.

And thus Mrs. Maggots Meat 'N Mush Stew was born.

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes in to Mrs. Maggots Meat 'N Mush Stew?” YOU MIGHT ASKFor the stew portion itself we're going to be using a hearty base, aiming for a layering of flavors. If you feel comfortable making a roux, feel free to do so, but I did not due to energy levels and thus the flour in this recipe is only used for searing the meat before its added to the pot.

Cubed beef

Flour

Peanut oil

Beef stock

Dried porcini mushrooms

Carrots, chopped

Onion, diced

Garlic, crushed

Scallion, chopped

Bay leaf

Salt and pepper

Ground red pepper

Cumin

Zatarins gumbo file

For the other mushrooms, were going to cook them separate and throw them in at the end (but they'll have friends to keep them company!!).

Cremini mushrooms, sliced

Half an onion

Carrots

Garlic

Salt and pepper

Thyme

Olive oil

This took about 4 hours in total. If you have a slow cooker itd probably be easier to use that, but as is isn't too bad either. I mostly worked on commission stuff in the kitchen in-between stirring. "The best food is the one you don't have to make, the second best food is the one you don't have to think while making."

AND, “what does Mrs. Maggots Meat 'N Mush Stew taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASK

HOT HOT HOT

Tastes like walking from the cold into the cramped but cozy bar your friend works at

Meat was so tender and juicy, melts in your mouth. Makes you cry

It wanst actually carmelization but the onions had a hint of tasting caramelized

Mushrooms- a strong umami flavor with a bit of smokeyness

Once you get that Perfect level of gumbo file, it just makes every other element stick out more

Like an energy booster for the ingredients

A spotlight on the bay leaf, and oils, and spices

. If you don't want to use beef, feel free to use vegetable stock instead and replace the cubes with strips of king oyster mushrooms. Exclude the flour but still cook them in the pan. . this isnt officially part of the recipe since im not sure itd be 'on theme', but feel free to start your rice cooker around the 3 hour mark so you can have some hot rice ready for serving as filler.

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When I was looking through food and food mentions in LotR, Mrs.Maggot just stook out to me. 'Queen amongst farmers wives' is both really sweet and a fuckin killer description. What a legend. I wanted to do something based on her and our two options were either beer, bacon or raw mushrooms. Beer while very appealing is also not something you can whip up in a day, while raw mushrooms have a chance of killing my beloved readers. I don't want to talk about me and bacons sordid past.

And so as praise to this funky farmer women, may you add this stew to your collection of potpie, lasagna, and roast recipes.

Did i mention i started my first grease fire when making this? Yeah. Don't cover any empty greased pan even if your intent is to keep water from splashing into it.

Anyway, this recipe is a solid 10/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) The partner has already made me pledge to cook it again hehehe

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

2 lbs cubed beef

A little bit of flour to 'tumble' the meat in, in a bowl

Peanut oil to sear the beef, as needed

3 kilograms beef stock

28g dried porcini mushrooms

4 carrots, chopped

1 white onion, diced

4 cloves garlic, crushed

1 scallion branch, chopped

Salt and pepper to taste

Ground red pepper to taste

Cumin to taste

3 bay leafs

A pinch of Zatarins gumbo file

Ingredients… . . TWO:

1 lb cremini mushrooms

Half of a white onion, diced

1 carrot, chopped

2 cloves garlic, crushed

Salt, pepper, and thyme to taste

Olive oil as needed to pan-fry

Method:

Put the porcini mushrooms into a bowl, add enough warm water to cover. Give them roughly 20 minutes, or until softened and the waters turned color.

Cut the carrots, onion, and garlic.

Get a large pot with a lid, pour in your stock (or water and bouillon cubes). Pour in the porcinis and the mushroom water. Turn the burner to medium-high.

Add your bay leaves, carrots, onion, and garlic to the pot. Add extra salt if you'd like.

Tenderize and cut your beef into roughly 1 inch cubes.

In a small bowl, pour a handful of flour along with pepper, cumin, and ground red pepper. Mix until combined.

Lightly toss each cube of beef in the mixture, get a little coverage on each side.

Heat a frying pan to medium heat and add peanut oil. If using an electric stovetop it will take time to heat up.

Add some of your beef cubes to the pan, don't overcrowd it. Flip to check sides are a light brown with dark brown edges, its good for some pink/red to poke through.

Add beef cubes to the pot when done, careful of splashing.

Keep doing this in batches until all beef cubes are added.

Once the pot has reached a simmer, turn the heat down a few notches and cover.

Set a timer for 4 hours. Taste test every so often. Aim to stir the pot every 10-15 minutes.

(You can do steps 14-21 immediately or optionally wait a bit)

Rinse and dry your cremini mushrooms.

Slice them vertically. Cut the carrots, onion, and garlic.

In a frying pan on medium-low heat, add olive oil, carrots, and onion. Keep the vegetables moving! When they start to change texture, add your cremini mushrooms.

Bring the pan up to medium heat.

Once your mushrooms have cooked off the liquid inside, theyll start turning a deeper brown. Add the garlic. Keep! the! vegetables! Moving!

If the pan gets overcrowded, take some out and set it aside in a bowl. Smaller batches.

This process took roughly 15 minutes, but youll know its done once everything has a nice sear on it and the garlic is brown but not burnt. Add salt, pepper, and thyme to taste.

Set everything aside in a bowl.

Once the 4 hours are up the meat should be cooked all the way through and tender enough to pull apart. Strain the bay leaves out. Cut and add scallions. Add the bowl with cremini mushrooms.

Add a pinch of gumbo file to start, stir and taste test.

#cross cooks lotr #food recipe #j.r.r. tolkien #soup recipes

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idyllic-ghost · 5 months

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title: A Whisper from the Forest pairing: lumberjack!Jihoon x dryad(tree nymph)!reader genre: fantasy/magical realism, romance/fluff, smut, angst warnings: slight angst, smut, penetration, oral (m and f receiving), fingering, body worship synopsis: When two lonely hearts meet, even under the strangest of circumstances, they bond with each other in a unique way. And as the weather grows cold, and as we seek warmth in the form of another’s embrace, we tend to seek those bonds out with more desperation. So when Jihoon - a solitary lumberjack living on the outskirts of a small town - finds himself enthralled with a fairytale creature of the forest, he doesn’t hesitate to let himself be held and loved. And who are you to deny him that love when it is all you want as well? wordcount: 11k tagging: @gyuwoncheol, @enhacolor, @shuabby1994, @junhui-recs, @dkakapizzaboy, @just-here-to-read-01, @loviehan, @userjunhuii, @novalpha, @bubblymoon, @aaniag

a/n: this is a collab with @svthub ! see the Fall-ing For You Collab here!! this will also be the last thing i post before i go on my indefinite hiatus!

join my taglist

MDNI

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Take a moment. Breathe in the cold air, smell the trees and the wet moss. Put your hand in the icy water of the river, and feel it thread through your fingers - trying to pull you with the stream. Take a moment, and clear your head. Whisper out a silent prayer for good luck for the rest of the day. Jihoon always takes everything day by day. Each morning is the same, but he would never think to do it differently. He stands up from where he was crouching by the river, looking up to the tops of the pine trees surrounding him. They seem to reach an abnormal length from where he was standing, but he knows better than to not let his mind be tricked by a single perspective. The sky was still tinted pink and orange from the sunrise. Waking up in the early hours of the morning was worth it for these small moments.

The barking coming from his family’s old cabin signals that Duke is ready for breakfast. An involuntary smile spread across his lips as he trudged towards the house. Without having to look down, Jihoon knew where to step and where to avoid putting his feet. After all these years he knew where the trees spread their roots and where the ground tended to turn softer after rainfall. The barking continued, sometimes followed by a howl, and Jihoon’s steps quickened. Making his way up the stone steps, which he put down himself, he could hear the pitter-patter of eager paws walking on the wooden patio. Duke had managed to open the door by himself again and was now running down the stairs to meet his owner. The brown labrador had his mouth wide open, in what almost looked like a smile, and his ears flopping back on his head due to the speed he had managed to pick up. When they collided, Jihoon let out a loud groan. Not even this was unusual to his daily routine, and he managed to stay stable despite the sixty-pound canine throwing himself at him.

“Are you hungry, bud?” Jihoon scratched the dog behind his ear, which satisfied him enough to stand still for a while. “Let’s make some breakfast, alright?”

Most of the trees outside of Jihoon’s, now fogged-up, windows were pine. There were a few leafy trees here and there, sticking out like a sore thumb due to their red and orange color, but his main source of wood was pine. Which is why his fireplace always had the faint smell of it. The steam coming from his pan was making the entire kitchen stuffy, and he was reminded once again that he had to fix his hood fan. And while the issue could be temporarily fixed by opening a window, it wasn’t ideal as the season grew colder.

Duke was eating his kibble but was temporarily interrupted by Jihoon putting a slice of bacon in his bowl as well. He didn’t seem to mind the interruption and happily continued while Jihoon went to sit down at the table. It was a small mahogany table, perfect for one. The carvings on the legs were uneven, a show of his craftsmanship. On the table laid the morning newspaper, which he had picked up before getting to making breakfast. It wasn’t incredibly interesting, but it was nice to keep up with the things that happened in the town. Jihoon lived right on the outskirts, like a hermit of sorts, and only drove his truck into town when he had to make a delivery or get something for himself. He had a small garden behind the cabin and if it was necessary he could go out into the forest and hunt, although he would rather not, so he didn’t visit many times. Maybe once a month for deliveries and to stock up on food. Most of the time he was alone right by the mountainside, in the middle of the woods. He didn’t mind being alone, and seeing as he had Duke he wasn’t necessarily lonely. Being in the town made him feel more lonely than ever. He could see his old classmates with new friends, random strangers going on dates, or families gathering together in mom-and-pop restaurants. Avoiding the town made him feel less lonely. Sometimes he’d think about what life would have looked like if he had followed his parents’ advice, to not take over the family business and try to get out in the world instead. For his own sake. But he felt a certain pride for the cabin, and the woods surrounding it.

The feeling of Duke licking his leg brought him out of his thoughts. Jihoon bent down and petted his dog’s head.

“At least I have you.” Jihoon sighed.

Duke gave him a look that seemed sympathetic, and although he knew that the dog couldn’t understand him it still gave Jihoon an ounce of comfort. He looked out of the window again. The sun had started rising above the trees now. It was time to start work.

Just as every other day, he went out into the woods with Duke and marked trees that needed to be cut down. These trees were on their way to wither away, or it was the town that had asked him to cut them down to create an easy access path. Jihoon didn’t like to cut down young trees, or trees that had no reason to be cut down. It felt like he was stealing from the forest and the wildlife. Maybe he wasn’t entirely cut out for this line of work. He usually disregarded those thoughts and kept doing it his way. Jihoon would also frequently plant new trees. As soon as the ground had thawed and turned soft after winter, he would buy new saplings to plant. That’s why you could see a lot of different trees in this forest, which otherwise was only pine. He, and the people before him, had planted them there.

After marking the trees with orange paint, he would go back to the cabin and cut up trees that he had already collected. A pile of empty tree trunks lay beside the cabin. Jihoon always cut off the twigs and branches and gathered them in bundles to use as firewood. This was the thing he made the most sales on. The bundles of twigs and branches were cheaper than the full logs. Even though the logs lasted longer in the fireplace, people would rather buy more of something cheap than invest in the logs. Jihoon didn’t mind - the money he got from those twigs put food on his table. But it was irritating at times when people refused to see that they could be much better off. Then again, maybe it was just irritating that no one asked for his opinion on the one thing that he knew anything about.

Towards the end of the afternoon, Duke was aching to go out on another walk. And as they always did, they picked a random direction to walk in and started their exploring. The forest was mapped out, of course, but it was a lot different to explore it with your own two feet - and Jihoon was sure that he still hadn’t walked in every place of the forest, even though he grew up in it. South of the cabin laid a small river, which he knew very well but hadn’t spent much time walking with. He had crossed the river and explored the edge of the mountain on the other side, but he hadn’t walked upstream. Duke seemed happy enough about the choice, wagging his tail and frolicking across the rocks and fallen trees.

The river wasn’t frozen, but it certainly felt like it when Jihoon put his hand in the water, and pulled it out quickly. He pulled his jacket tighter around him and tried to hide his hands in his sleeves. He should have brought gloves, it always came as an afterthought at this time of year - no matter how many times he had experienced it. The tip of his nose was numb, but his feet were sweating in the thick pair of socks he was wearing. It didn’t help that he had brought out his winter boots. Jihoon wondered how it could be that Duke didn’t seem cold at all. His fur wasn’t very thick, yet he didn’t have a problem with dipping his paw in the freezing river and walking on. Of course, he knew better than to jump in, which he didn’t do as a puppy. But over the years, Duke came to understand that if he jumped in the water when it was cold outside it meant that playtime was over. He had yet to learn about running off whenever he saw something interesting.

Jihoon knows that he should keep his dog on a leash when exploring new areas. Duke was well-behaved when he was in a familiar climate, but he always got too excited when seeing something new. So when he ran away from the river, in a random direction, it shouldn’t have surprised Jihoon as much as it did. The owner followed his happy dog to a glade that he had yet to see. The glade was of monumental size, and it bewildered Jihoon that he hadn’t found this yet. In the middle of this open space, stood an old apple tree. He wasn’t knowledgeable about different kinds of apple trees, but Jihoon did know that a few kinds of apples didn’t ripen until late autumn. Duke hurried to the tree, and Jihoon followed with long strides.

“Stop!” he shouted out in vain.

There was something about the tree that had Duke transfixed. Jihoon couldn’t blame him, even though he was mesmerized by the tree. He hadn’t seen any fruit trees in the forest before. Although he had planned on planting some outside his house, he had never gotten around to it. The grand space surrounding the apple tree was strange as well. You would think that this space would be filled with tree saplings by now. Even more strange, Jihoon couldn’t remember a large glade such as this one on any map he had ever studied of the forest.

Duke was running around the tree trunk and rolling around on the flourishing grass. Jihoon closed in on the tree with weary steps. The tree wasn’t long, but it was thick and its branches spread out wide. It was the kind of tree that every child would want to climb on, so despite its old age, it felt youthful. The bark mirrored the river in its flowing motions. He had the urge to reach out his hand and trace the ridges but held himself back. The leaves were bright and green, and the fruit sat in clumps on the branches - weighing them down to hang lower than they otherwise would. Jihoon could reach out and grab a shiny red apple if he so pleased, but he decided not to. They looked delicious, mostly red with a few green splotches, and although he didn’t have much knowledge about apples, Jihoon knew that they were ripe for harvesting.

It was hard to leave the glade, something pulled Jihoon back into its warm embrace. But he knew that he had to get home and feed Duke - let alone himself. Duke had problems leaving too, but his stomach also seemed to push him over the edge eventually. When Jihoon looked back at the tree, it almost looked like it had turned and reached out for him. But he knew that that would be impossible.

That night Jihoon dreamt of the glade. The forest around him was a blur, and all he could see was the apple tree. It beckoned him in a swaying motion, calling his name. He walked slowly to the tree, but despite his leisurely steps he still ended up by the tree within seconds. The wind was calm, barely there even - he couldn’t quite tell where his skin ended and the air began. He reached out and touched the bark. The rough-looking bark felt smooth under his calloused palms. It was damp as if it had just been raining, but not in the way that water could make wood feel almost slimy. It just felt fresh. Jihoon closed the distance between himself and the tree, putting his cheek against the bark. With his ear against the tree, he could hear a faint heartbeat. He took a shaky breath and looked up at the crown of the tree. Right above him hung a red apple - he had never seen an apple so ruby red, so perfectly shaped and colored. On instinct, he reached for it, plucked it, and brought it to his lips without hesitation. His hot breath fogged up the shiny apple. Was he allowed to take a bite? Jihoon could hear the heartbeat from the tree without even leaning against it. It was beating faster. His lips parted slowly, and his teeth dug into the skin of the fruit. Juices flooded his mouth, sweet and heavenly, and dripped down his chin. The juice from the apple dribbled down his jaw, down his torso - it felt like a finger tracing his skin, and it left a trail of goosebumps down his body. The flesh of the fruit tasted like honey, and when he had taken one bite he couldn’t stop himself from taking another. His teeth dug into the apple like a hungry animal that had finally caught its prey. Suddenly, Jihoon could feel a pair of hands rubbing his back. The person’s breath fanned against his neck.

“Come back to me.” It was a woman’s voice, as sweet as the apple Jihoon just ate.

In mere seconds, everything was taken away from him. The taste of the apple, the feeling of the tree, the woman’s voice - they, and even the memory of them, were all gone when Jihoon woke up. All that was left from the dream was an innate longing to go back to the glade. He thought about it all day. His body went on auto-pilot to commit to all of his chores, but his mind was in the glade. There was something special about the place, it felt like it had taken a part of him and kept it as hostage. So when the time came for Duke’s afternoon walk, Jihoon took the lead and walked the same path they had the day before. And much like the day before, his dog ran off at a random point during the walk. However, today it seemed to be in a different area altogether and yet Jihoon ended up in that same glade.

The apple tree stood tall, its apples almost golden in the light of the sun. Jihoon hurried over, tripping over roots and other such things on the way. It didn’t matter if he fell, there was something about the tree that made dirtying his clothes and scraping his knees worth it. As he approached the tree, it welcomed him. It looked like it took a sigh of relief when it could feel his presence again. In bits and pieces, the dream came back to him. Jihoon pressed his ear to the tree, but he couldn’t hear a heartbeat. He felt a little foolish and backed away from the tree. Duke had laid down beside it, putting his head on one of its large roots, and looked at Jihoon judgingly.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Jihoon huffed and turned back to the tree. “Dreams make people do weird things sometimes.”

As Jihoon looked a little closer at the tree, it started changing. Twisting and turning its body, as if it was stretching after sitting down for long, and moving its branches, like someone moving their joints. The leaves rustled and a few apples fell. Right in front of his eyes, the tree was turning into a woman. As the tree kept turning and bending in all kinds of ways, it was also changing its very form. The body was shaped with curves and edges, the leaves turned into hair, and the bark turned into skin. The woman groaned as her transformation was complete - taking a single step before falling to the ground. Jihoon hurried to her side, kneeling to see that she was alright. She wasn’t all human, her body still looked like it was made of bark and leaves in most places of her body, but she definitely wasn’t just a tree anymore. Without so much as an explanation as to what she was, the tree-woman sat up and wiggled around her limbs - like someone trying to get life back in their foot after it had fallen asleep.

“Are you alright?” Jihoon stuttered out.

“I think so.” The tree-woman looked up at him with a smile. “I’m glad you came back.”

She stood up and walked over to Duke, who usually growled at strangers but was now as happy as ever. Jihoon watched her interact with his dog, petting him and talking to him - not in a baby voice like most people do with dogs, but in a tone that indicated that Duke was talking back.

“I’ll tell him.” She nodded, stood up from where she was crouching, and turned to Jihoon. “He says it’s time to go home, he’s hungry.”

“Uhm…” Jihoon looked between the tree-woman and his dog. “Okay.”

Duke ran up to his side happily, and the tree-woman looked content. She walked over to where her tree once stood and picked up one of the apples that had fallen to the ground. When she handed it to him, Jihoon took the apple with little to no hesitation.

“Who are you?” he asked.

“I’ve been called a lot of things…” She pondered for some time before adding. “You can call me Y/N.”

Jihoon nodded. He didn’t feel like he needed to tell her his name, something told him that she already knew. Without another word, she wandered off in a random direction. Despite seemingly choosing at random, she also looked like she knew exactly where she was going. Jihoon headed in the opposite direction, back home.

The journey back home was faster than yesterday, and yet when he arrived he saw the tree-woman standing beside his house. She was looking at the piles of lumber in Jihoon’s backyard. When she saw that he had arrived, he expected her to look angry. However, his assumptions were incorrect, as she smiled instead.

“How did you…”

“Welcome home,” she said.

“Thank you?” Jihoon looked around himself, trying to find a way that this woman could get to his house before him. “How did you get here so fast?”

She ignored his question and began walking up the stairs, looking down at him expectantly with every other step. Duke didn’t hesitate to follow her to the front door of the house. Jihoon eventually followed and, even though it went against all of his instincts, let the woman inside his house. A trail of leaves and small pieces of bark trailed behind her as she walked toward the couch. She laid down and closed her eyes, not uttering a single excuse as to what she was doing there. Jihoon draped a blanket around her. The apple she had given him was placed on the kitchen counter, going untouched for the rest of the day.

Jihoon couldn’t fall asleep that night. Partially because there was a stranger in his house, which he couldn’t bring himself to kick out, but also because of an excitement that was growing in his chest - a feeling that not even the most skilled of stoics could deny. There was something about this woman, about Y/N, that had his body completely tensed up and intoxicated. Like a kid before Christmas morning, Jihoon couldn’t, no matter how hard he tried, go to sleep. He laid in bed, tossing and turning, trying to drown out his own thoughts by forcing himself to think about other things. These feelings were entirely too embarrassing for him to feel, was what Jihoon had convinced himself had to be the truth.

That morning, when Jihoon walked into his kitchen, he caught a glimpse of the tree-woman’s naked figure - barely draped in the blanket that Jihoon had given her last night. There were no signs of her being a tree anymore. Her skin was cleared from patches of bark, and her hair didn’t have leaves stuck in it. The only reason Jihoon knew that he hadn’t dreamt the entire thing, was the piles of leaves and tree remains on his carpet. It reminded him of when Duke started shedding more than usual, the way it seemed to stick to every surface of the room. Y/N noticed him and turned her body towards him, not caring that the blanket covered absolutely nothing. Jihoon quickly turned around in a flustered frenzy.

“Sorry-” He coughed to try to cover the crack in his voice.

“It’s okay,” she hummed. “I don’t mind.”

She sounded almost surprised at his reaction, as if it was normal of her to walk around naked and for others to see her like that. Jihoon heard shuffling behind him, slow and careful movements.

“I’ll cover up if it makes you uncomfortable,” she said.

Jihoon turned slowly to look at her again. The blanket was wrapped over her head and tightly around her frame, hiding every inch of her skin except her face. She looked at him expectantly, but he wasn’t sure what she was expecting. Maybe a thank you or for him to assure her that it was alright. But no words left Jihoon’s lips, he just stared into her eyes. He had to force himself to look away.

“I should get you clothes…” He walked back towards his bedroom. “Wait here.”

The two of them ate breakfast together - Jihoon ate a non-meat breakfast for the first time since he could remember, just in case it would somehow offend her if he didn’t. Y/N kept her eyes on the window, watching the rain fall heavily on the mossy ground, but Jihoon couldn’t get his eyes off of her. It was scary how normal she looked, when she had just barely twelve hours ago looked like an actual tree. It was like something out of the fantasy books he used to read when he was young. Just twelve hours ago she was covered in colorful leaves and bumpy bark, and now she looked like any other woman - wearing one of his flannel shirts. The only reason he knew that he hadn’t been dreaming was the trail of her old self covering all of the living room. Instead of dwelling too much on it, Jihoon simply welcomed her company - despite the rational part of his brain screaming at him that this was not normal.

It seemed like it was never going to stop raining. Although rain had never stopped Jihoon before, he decided that it meant that he had to stay home with Y/N. After breakfast, she sat down on the living room floor and played with Duke. She had a strange instant connection with him, which Jihoon had never seen Duke have with anyone else. While the two of them played, Jihoon did the dishes - occasionally stopping to look back at the adorable scene playing out just as he had imagined before. He hadn’t imagined it with Y/N, of course, but just with someone. He had dreamed of bringing someone home and living a domestic life with them in this cabin. As mundane as it sounded, Jihoon longed to get to make breakfast for someone and wash their dishes - he wanted to hand them a cup of coffee in the morning, just as they got out of bed, and kiss their cheek as a silent way to say “good morning”. Jihoon smiled to himself as he pictured it in front of him, now with you as that someone. The thoughts quickly disappeared as he felt a tapping on his shoulder. Y/N and Duke were standing right behind him, both of them looking at him expectantly. It reminded him of how Duke would sit quietly beside him as soon as he started rustling with plastic.

“Duke says that he wants to play outside,” she said.

“What?”

“Can we?” she asks as if she needed his permission to do so. “I won’t take him out too far- and we’ll be back soon.”

Jihoon looked at her, and then out the window. It was still raining. When he looked down at Duke, he was still sitting perfectly still with a pleading look in his eye. He looked back at Y/N, who had the same look in her eyes.

“But it’s raining.” Jihoon pointed at the window.

“Rain is not a bad thing,” she said, “And definitely not a reason to stay inside.”

Duke barked, gaining Jihoon’s attention again. They both looked set in their decision. How could Jihoon say no to that?

“I mean, sure.” Jihoon looked between the two of them. “I’ll finish the dishes.”

Jihoon watched them run around like fools from his window. She was building up piles of leaves for Duke to jump in, and throwing sticks for him to fetch. Duke was normally a reserved dog around strangers, but she seemed to have him wrapped around her little finger. Where she ran, he followed. They were both soaked when they came back inside - but Y/N was still smiling and Duke’s tail was still wagging back and forth. Jihoon handed Y/N a towel, before helping Duke dry off.

“I’m freezing…” Y/N giggled through chattering teeth.

“I could make a fire,” Jihoon suggested cautiously. “If that’s… okay?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Because…” Jihoon had no idea how to phrase it. “The wood?”

“I have no connection to trees that have died, if that’s what you’re asking.” She shrugged off the, now wet, flannel shirt, making Jihoon look away from her quickly. “I know that you only take the trees that have already died, you know? You don’t have to be nervous… Do you have another one of these that I can wear?”

“... closet,” Jihoon mumbled, his ears glowing red.

She thanked him before leaving. Jihoon felt like a teenager again. He shouldn’t get this flustered by the silhouette of a naked woman in the corner of his eyes. Duke whined, and Jihoon realized that he had stopped drying him off. He muttered an apology to the dog, and continued drying him off.

Y/N came back out of his room just a few minutes later with new clothes on - an old sweatshirt and a pair of pajama pants - and holding a book in her hands. It was dusty from sitting on his bookshelf for ages. She showed him the cover, it was a book about forest creatures.

“What’s this?”

“A book from my childhood,” he hummed and took the book from her hands. “I forgot that I still had this.”

She sat down on the couch and patted on the place beside her. The fire was already burning in the fireplace, so Jihoon did as she wanted and sat down. Although Duke wasn’t normally allowed on the couch, he jumped up and laid his head in Y/N’s lap.

“Read to me,” she said.

Jihoon opened the book. The text was big, and there were lots of pictures, so it wasn’t a long read. And yet, they sat there for hours. Y/N was pointing at things, either laughing or explaining what the creatures really looked like. It surprised Jihoon that all of his childhood fantasies were true. The amount of times he had gone into the woods looking for these creatures, and they might have actually been there right under his nose. Not all of it was real, but the fact that any of it, even such a small portion, was real was enough for him. When they got to the page about dryads, tree nymphes, she went quiet. Jihoon cleared his throat and kept reading.

“Dryad…” He paused before reading the next sentence. “A nymph or nature spirit who lives in trees and takes the form of a beautiful young woman.”

Y/N looked at the picture, tracing the drawing’s figure with her fingers. Jihoon studied her expression, trying to find even the smallest inkling to what she was thinking. Her face was a blank canvas.

“Do you think I look like that?” she asked.

“Not really… they’ve got a few things right, I suppose.” He looked closer at the picture.

“... am I beautiful?”

Her words took the air out of his lungs. How was he supposed to answer that? He immediately started overthinking, and having her stare at his flustered face didn’t help. When he faced her, his mouth dried out. She was looking at him with big glittering eyes, her eyebrows slightly furrowed.

“I think you’re beautiful,” he said.

She smiled, pleased with his answer, and turned to focus on the book again. Jihoon kept his eyes on her as she flipped the page, laughing at the next picture as soon as she laid eyes on it. His heart flipped in his ribcage, and he began nervously fidgeting with the corner of the book.

“Read this one!”

The next morning, the rain had stopped. There was a slight chill in the air, but not enough to create frost and not enough to keep Jihoon inside yet another day. He took Duke out for his walk, and Y/N followed. She was wrapped up in Jihoon’s winter coat, as he had insisted. Duke was running ahead of them, even though he had seen this part of the forest at least a hundred times already, and Jihoon and Y/N took their time strolling down the path. Questions were itching in the back of Jihoon’s mind, and walking in silence didn’t help. So, even though he knew that he maybe shouldn’t, he asked.

“Could I ask a few questions?” he asked, and quickly added, “About you?”

“Go ahead.”

She didn’t look at him, but she was smiling. It was as if she had expected it to happen at this particular moment.

“How…” Jihoon had a million questions running through his mind all at once, and just had to settle on one. “How do you know me?”

“You work in the forest,” she said. “So do I.”

“... and what is it that you do?”

“I keep it alive.” She finally turned to him. “I keep it in harmony. This forest is me, just as much as I am it. I have to protect it.”

“From people like me?”

“Not exactly…” She sighed and turned away from him again, slowing down her steps. “Humans are also a part of the forest, if we take people like you out of it then we can’t have harmony. It is the people who go out of their way to disrespect my home that I have to be cautious of.”

Jihoon nodded. He understood, he had seen the trash laying in bushes and the people who try to hunt even when it’s not the season. A feeling of relief washed over him when he understood that she wasn’t there to haunt him in some way.

“I thought that you’d remember me,” she murmured.

“Remember you?”

“I met you many years ago. You were… tiny.” Her eyebrows were furrowed in confusion. “I had only just taken over the forest, and I found you crying. You were lost, so I helped you back.”

Jihoon had a faint memory of getting lost for the first time. Despite his parents having told him to stay still and hug a tree, he couldn’t help but follow the tiny whirlwind of leaves that eventually led him out of the forest. He didn’t mention this to Y/N, he wasn’t sure how to.

“You’re bigger now,” she commented. “It feels a bit strange to see.”

“What? That I’ve grown up?”

“Yeah… to be fair, I wasn’t very big then either but…” She narrowed her eyes at him. “I thought you’d stay tiny.”

Jihoon let out a choked laugh, which made her smile. He loved to make her smile, it felt like seeing the sun peak out of the clouds after a heavy storm.

Jihoon started spending more and more time with Y/N. The only time he wasn’t with her was when he was making deliveries, or out getting food. Being isolated for so long made even the strangest companions welcome. He had made a temporary home for her in his room, opting to sleep on a spare bed that he used to give to guests. It was creaky and uncomfortable, so it was out of the question for him to give it to her. She was practically a goddess, he couldn’t give her an old guest bed. Every day was filled with laughter, something that Jihoon hadn’t experienced in a while. His face would light up every time she walked into his line of vision, and he was sure she noticed.

One day, during their afternoon walk, Jihoon found himself walking the same path that he had about a week ago - when he first saw the glade. He didn’t think much of it, he was just following Duke. But even when his dog wanted to go in a different direction, his legs insisted on following the familiar route. Y/N didn’t say anything. Her arm was wrapped around his, looking at the ground to make sure that she didn’t step on something. It was only when they had entered the glade that she acknowledged it.

“We’re back here?” She hummed in slight surprise.

The glade looked the same, except there was no apple tree anymore. In the place where she had stood was a spot where no grass would grow. You could say that the grass wouldn’t grow because it was nearing winter, but Jihoon knew that even if it was a warm summer day there wouldn’t grow any grass on that patch.

“I guess we are…” Jihoon looked around. “Do you want to leave?”

“No,” she said. “Let’s go sit down.”

They sat down on the grass, right in front of the bare patch. The ground was cold, and Jihoon wished that he had brought along a blanket to lay down under them. Y/N didn’t seem to mind.

“I’m glad that Duke helped you find this place,” she said, “Otherwise I don’t think I’d ever meet you.”

Jihoon looked over at Duke, who was running around the glade.

“He helped me here?”

“I called on him, yes.” She put her hand on his knee. “I wanted to see you.”

Jihoon thought about the dream, and if she could possibly have anything to do with it. He looked at her, watched her lean her head against his shoulder, and decided that he had to ask - he needed to know.

“I had a dream that night…” he started and turned his head away from her. “After I had been here the first time.”

“Hm?”

“I dreamt that I was in the glade, and I ate an apple.” Jihoon could feel her staring at him. “And I think you called out to me… to come back.”

“You ate the apple?” She said it in a tone that Jihoon couldn’t quite place, he didn’t know if she was sad, or angry, or just surprised.

“Yeah… was that bad?”

“No! No, not at all.” She laughed, Jihoon was yet again reminded of silverbells. “Before I became the protector of this forest, I lived with other dryads… they would always tell a story about fruit trees, that those who ate our fruit had promised themselves to us in some way… it’s a silly story, but to some it’s seen as a promise of devotion.”

“Devotion?”

“It’s stupid, isn’t it?” She turned to look at him with a smile, which faded when she saw his serious expression.

“No, I don’t think so.”

A million thoughts were racing through Jihoon’s head, but they all quieted down when Y/N moved closer to him. He could feel her breath against his lips. His eyes drifted down to her lips, his hand moved to cup her cheek. As he moved even closer her eyes fluttered shut. Their lips met; it was a short kiss. Her lips were soft, and the feeling of them lingered on Jihoon’s lips. In his stomach, butterflies started flying around. Her skin was so soft under his calloused palm. Her hands reached for the back of his head, and pulled him in for another kiss. Their lips locked, and Jihoon began feeling warm all over - forgetting about how he had just complained about the cold ground. Her fingers were in his hair, gently caressing his scalp. She tasted like honey, reminding him of how the apple in his dream had tasted. He grew greedy, trying to get closer to her. However, his attempt failed and they both fell to the ground - him on top of her.

“Shit, I’m sorry-”

She was laughing. His face turned red, before realizing that she wasn’t laughing at him. He let out a faint chuckle, which was followed by more laughter. Once he had gotten up, he helped her up as well - she was still giggling, but he had a feeling that it was more from excitement rather than the fact that they fell over.

“I’m sorry for laughing,” she said.

“You don’t have to apologize.” Jihoon took her hand, and she quickly intertwined her fingers with his.

“Are you ready to head home?”

That night, Y/N asked him if he would sleep in the bed with her. Her reasoning was that she knew the guest bed was uncomfortable, but Jihoon didn’t care about explanations or excuses. He welcomed spending a night holding her, even when his arm grew numb from being under her for so long. Nothing more than sleeping happened, but Jihoon still woke up with the feeling that he had crossed a line that he couldn’t go back from.

Y/N was still sleeping when Jihoon got out of bed. He went into the kitchen, prepared to make something for the both of them. The apple that she had given to him the first day she met was hiding behind his kettle. He must have forgotten that it was there. Despite it having gone a week since then, the apple looked the same. It hadn’t aged at all. Jihoon looked back at the closed door to the bedroom, and thought about what Y/N had said. Devotion. Jihoon brought his lips to the apple and took a bite. It was as sweet as he remembered.

Another couple days had passed since they kissed. Neither of them talked about it, or repeated the action, but the air around them had changed. Every accidental touch held much more weight than it used to. Everytime her fingers would brush over his, it would leave his hand with a burning sensation. Everytime he glanced at her lips, his ears would turn red. It was no secret that he had fallen in love with her, and not acknowledging it was making it worse.

It was getting dark outside, partly because of the sun going down but also because of the rainclouds that were coming their way. Duke had taken his place in Jihoon’s bedroom, refusing to come out of his fluffy dog bed. It was no surprise, since he had been running around in the cold all day. But with him absent, it made the air between Jihoon and Y/N even thicker. When it started raining, Jihoon was relieved to hear Y/N suggest that they go outside. Maybe a bit of cold rain was just what he needed. The two of them ran outside, not bothering with putting on coats or better clothes. Y/N ran around on the cold grass, but Jihoon looked up at the sky. He closed his eyes and let the rain just fall on him. He only looked around himself when he heard laughter - silver bells.

“What?” he asked.

“You always look so stoic.” She grinned. “You should have more fun, you know?”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

A wide grin appeared on Jihoon’s face, and he began chasing her. She ran as fast as she could on the slippery grass, letting out a shrill scream as he captured her. His strong arms wrapped around her waist and lifted her up.

“Is this what you mean by fun?” he huffed.

She only laughed in response, kicking to try to get him to put her down. When he did, they took a moment to breathe. They were both panting, completely soaked through from the rain, and couldn’t break eye contact with each other. As their laughter died down, Jihoon wrapped his arms around her again - now more gentle.

“You ate the apple.” She put her hands on his chest.

Jihoon went quiet, but nodded. He wouldn’t lie to her. She must have been the one that put it behind the kettle - maybe a way to see if he would take it.

“Why?” she asked.

“I don’t know…” He sighed. “I thought about what you said… about devotion.”

“And?”

“And I couldn’t stop thinking about how I would do anything for you.” Any rational thinking had escaped him, he needed to speak his mind. “I want to be… I am devoted to you. I haven’t felt this strongly about anything in years.”

Y/N’s hands creeped up his chest and her arms wrapped around his neck. She leaned up and pressed a kiss to his cheek… then to his other cheek. Her nose brushed his, waiting for him to take the final step to kiss her. He looked at her, studied the lustful look in her eyes, and brought his lips to his forehead. A soft peck.

“Will you have me?” he asked carefully.

“Yes,” she said, “I want you.”

“Good.” He pressed his lips to hers, just as quickly as he had kissed her forehead. “Let’s go back inside. I’ll make a fire.”

They got a change of clothes, and Jihoon prepared the fireplace. She didn’t seem too happy about leaving their moment so quickly, but Jihoon didn’t blame her - he wouldn’t be very happy about it either. He needed to be sure that it was what she wanted, then he would give her everything and more. Despite his attempts, Jihoon wasn’t the type to have a quick fling. He needed this to be special, not something he would regret, or wish that he had done differently. So he made up a fire, and put down blankets and pillows on the floor for the two of them to warm up. The fire lit up her face in the most celestial way. She was mesmerized by the flame, but he was devoted to only looking at her. When she gave him the honor of meeting his gaze, his heart skipped a beat. She reached for his hand, quietly picking it up to bring to her lips. They were soft against his rough skin. How she could touch him so delicately, he would never understand.

“Thank you,” she said, “For taking me in. It’s been so long since I've gotten to be with someone like this.”

Jihoon brought her hand to his chest, pushing her palm flat right on top of where his heart was rapidly beating. She smiled at him and moved closer. Her one hand stayed on his chest, while the other caressed the area where his neck met his shoulder. The sparkle in her eye when she felt his heartbeat quicken made him all the more eager to please her. She was the only thing that mattered right now, she was the only person in the world for him. Y/N toyed with the hair on the nape of his neck, then letting her hand slip down the back of his shirt - just slightly letting her fingertips grace the top of his broad back.

“I couldn’t bring myself to leave you,” he murmured, “Not for a second.”

Her smile widened. She was pleased. Jihoon let out a soft sigh as he stared at her lovingly. Y/N shuffled around to straddle his lap, pressing her core against his crotch. Slowly, she began rocking her hips back and forth. Jihoon, who had been aching for all this time, couldn’t help but moan at the slight movements.

“Do you want to please me?” she asked.

“More than anything,” Jihoon whined.

He put his head in the nape of her neck, breathing in her scent. Jihoon could get high on her scent, in a way that no other drug could ever possibly live up to. Y/N started grinding down harder on him, her hands wandering to gently pull on his hair. Jihoon didn’t know what to do with himself, the sensation was too overwhelming, and he could only think of wrapping his arms around her to pull her in closer. He began leaving open-mouthed kisses along her clavicle and up her neck, gracing his death against her skin ever so slightly. Even through his clothes, her movements felt divine - Jihoon could only imagine what it would feel like being inside her.

“Look at me.” She pulled on his hair to get him to stop sucking bruises on her neck. “Do you feel desperate, Jihoon?”

“Yes.”

“I can see that.” She grinned. “You’ll do anything for me, right?”

“Anything.”

“Take off your clothes and lay down.”

Y/N stood up from her place on his lap, and Jihoon hurried to rip off his clothes. Just as he had pulled off his shirt, and was about to take off his belt, she bent over to pull off her underwear. In the light of the fire, he could see her pussy glistening. With immense self-control, he pulled off his pants and laid down as she had told him - instead of licking up every drop that was running down her legs. Like a man starved waiting for his first meal in ages, Jihoon felt his mouth watering at the thought of having her - impatiently waiting for her to let him ravage her. His wishes were granted as she took her place on top of his face. Jihoon was almost too quick to grab her hips and pull her down to meet his mouth. His tongue laid flat against her pussy, drinking her up as if she was the fountain of youth. When she began grinding on his face, he knew he was a goner. There was a big mess all over his face at this point, probably on the floor as well, but he didn’t care. Jihoon moaned against her, trying to push her further down - not caring if he was suffocated in the process.

“Don’t stop- you’re going to make me cum,” she moaned, and it only egged him on further.

With the same pace and rigor, he devoured her whole. Wet, messy noises could be heard throughout the cabin, along with their combined moans and groans. Her cum was as sweet as nectar, and if she hadn’t pulled away he would’ve continued eating her out well past overstimulation. She was his drug. Jihoon leaned on his elbows and watched her ribcage rise and fall. Y/N was back on his lap again, dangerously close to his, painfully hard, cock.

“You’re such a good boy for me,” she breathed out. “Thank you.”

Her words whirred around in his head over and over again. He needed to please her, he needed to hear her say that again.

“More,” he rasped.

Before she could think to respond, Jihoon had pounced on her. Her body still limp from her orgasm, she laid beneath him spread out for him to enjoy. But Jihoon didn’t kiss her until she had given him a small nod. Teeth were clashing, the mess they had already made was being spread around, and clammy hands were gripping at whatever body parts were the closest. Jihoon kissed down her body, wanting to taste her again.

“You’re a goddess,” he murmured against her skin, “Let me worship you. Please.”

His face was in between her legs again, looking up at her with sparkling eyes. She put out her hand to gently caress his cheek, making him close his eyes and lean into her touch. Maybe he could ignore his own needs - as long as she would let him have her.

“You’ve proven yourself to me,” she whispered. “I want to repay you.”

She sat up and pushed him to lay down again. Now that they were in the same position as before, instead of approaching his face, she leaned down to press kisses on his abdomen. Slowly, her lips traveled south. Jihoon leaned on his elbows again, trying to take her all in despite the urge to shut his eyes tight in pure bliss. Her velvet tongue licked a stripe up his shaft before enclosing her lips around his cock. His mouth fell open and his eyes wandered to the back of his head as she took him deeper and deeper down her throat. She looked up at him, her eyes big and teary from gagging. Pulling herself up, her mouth let go of his head with a pop. Her hand wrapped around his aching cock and slowly stroked it.

“You’re heaven,” he moaned. “You’re-... you’re surreal…”

“I’m yours,” she corrected. “I’ll let you do with me as you please.”

With that said, she wrapped her lips around him again and began bobbing her head up and down. Jihoon’s hips stuttered up, which he quickly apologized for. But the moan that escaped her, and vibrated against him, made him take his apology back. He thought about what she had said, and laid down flat again so that he could intertwine his fingers in her hair. She hummed in approval, and Jihoon began guiding her movements. At first he was soft and gentle, but as he grew more impatient so did his movements.

“Fuck, your mouth feels so good around me,” he hissed.

As he fucked her throat, she became a gagging, moaning mess. Looking up at him with lustful eyes, she silently begged him to continue. Watching her fall apart like this - all because of him - made his eyes roll to the back of his head and, without thinking, he came down her throat. Jihoon watched her take it all and swallow once she had removed her mouth from him. She leaned over him and kissed him again, desperate to stay as close as possible.

“I’m burning for you,” she whined when she pulled away from his lips. “Please help me.”

Jihoon held her face in his palms, bringing her in for another kiss. His lips moved slowly against hers, as they changed positions yet again. Only when he was on top of her - her legs spread wide for him - did he break the kiss. His lips traveled down her jaw and neck, down to the valley of her breast. He watched her writhe beneath him as his hand massaged one of her breasts, letting his mouth wrap around the nipple of the other. Her eyes were shut and her mouth wide open, not hiding any noises she made. With his free hand, he began toying with her sensitive clit. Her eyes opened in shock, clearly not expecting this to be the direction for him to go in. But he knew that he’d have to prep her before he could be inside her. So, once his fingers were coated in her slick, he pushed two fingers inside her. With gentle movements, he curled his fingers with each pull. His thumb found her clit again - applying pressure to the bud made her clench around him. Her hands reached for his shoulders, digging her nails into his skin. At the pressure of her nails, Jihoon lifted his head from her body and shifted his attention to her face. Her face was scrunched up in pleasure, and her eyes opened only when Jihoon pulled out his fingers. She didn’t have time to protest before his slick fingers were in her mouth. Enclosing her lips around them, she let out a soft hum.

“Do you taste how sweet you are?” he murmured, and took out his fingers from her mouth.

Y/N lifted up her hands and cupped Jihoon’s face softly, guiding him to kiss her again. His eyes fluttered shut as he enjoyed the moment of peace amidst the impassioned energy surrounding them. At the sound of her laughter, like the sound of silver bells, he let them open again.

“You looked so blissful.” She brushed a few hairs out his face.

“I am blissful, darling.”

They let their eyes linger, looking deep into the windows of their souls. The once awkward and somewhat cold man was now bearing his heart for her, and she wanted to drink it all up. After pressing a kiss to his cheek, she gave him a nod - which he understood immediately. As much as he enjoyed the peace, he could not ignore the aching sensation in his lower abdomen any longer. He hadn’t longed for someone this much before. Lining up his cock with her entrance, he slowly pushed inside of her. A string of curses left his lips, he was still sensitive from his previous orgasm. Y/N hushed his words with another kiss until he had bottomed out inside her.

“You’re so good to me,” she whispered against his lips. “And so beautiful…”

Jihoon’s face turned red. She was studying his features, all while trying to fight back the urge to close her eyes in pleasure. Being watched wasn’t something that Jihoon was used to, no less admired. Instead of answering, he started moving - which forced her to finally shut her eyes. A guttural moan left her lips as he seemed to have found the spot inside her that could make her eyes roll into the back of her head. Her hands gripped his shoulders tightly, urging him silently to keep going. With the arm that wasn’t holding him up, Jihoon moved Y/N’s legs even further apart - gripping the flesh of her thighs. His head dipped down to her neck, placing soft kisses to her collar bone area.

“Mine,” he murmured against her skin.

Her hands moved to hold his back, letting her fingernails sink into his skin.

“All yours,” she whispered into his ear and let her nails drag down his back. “You're mine too, aren’t you?”

Jihoon groaned out a yes, his hips faltering as he lost his focus. Y/N leaned her head up, giving him more access to leave colorful marks on her neck. She locked her legs around his hips, enclosing him completely.

“Will you cum inside me, then?”

Jihoon’s movements stopped completely, unsure if he had heard her right. He moved to look at her, and he was met with a sweet smile - which definitely didn’t match what she had just asked of him. Her limbs wrapped around him tighter.

“Do you want that?” he asked.

“I want all of you,” she hummed, and leaned up to place a dulcet kiss on his lips. “Will you let me?”

“I’ll do anything for you,” he murmured and started moving again.

His forehead leaned against hers, trying to keep his eyes open to hold her gaze. Her eyes kept shifting to his lips, and fluttering close whenever he found her spot. Soft sighs and whimpers echoed through the room - along with choked moans and groans. Both tired, but neither wanted to stop. Their lips met in a clash, desperately needing to close the distance. As their bodies moved in unison, something was building up in them - yearning to break free.

“I’m close,” he murmured against her lips.

“Me too… just a little more, please, baby,” she whined.

Jihoon couldn’t deny her when she sounded like that. He couldn’t find it in himself to deny her anything at all. With sloppy movements, they continued until Jihoon felt like he was going to burst. A string of curse words escaped his lips.

“It’s okay, baby,” she moaned, “You can cum- cum inside me. Please, give it all to me.”

She kept urging him; telling him not to stop, that she was so close, and begging him to release himself inside her. He wouldn’t - couldn’t - deny her command. With a soft moan, he reached his orgasm. Despite the overstimulation, he kept moving until her hips were spasming. Both of them were heaving, unable to move. Jihoon stayed on top of her, his head having dipped into the crook of Y/N’s neck from his muscles exhaustion. He doesn’t put all of his weight on her, he wouldn’t dream of it. Her limbs are still wrapped around him, but just barely hanging there instead of gripping him tightly like she had before. After pressing a soft kiss to her neck, he mustered the strength to get up. He sat on his knees, watching her figure. Her eyes were still closed, her mouth slightly agape.

“Did you fall asleep?” he asked, mostly as a joke.

“No…” she mumbled in a way that made it seem like she’d fall asleep at any second.

“I’ll get something to clean you up,” he said, “I won’t be gone for long. Just wait here for me.”

The last bit was maybe redundant. She couldn’t move, let alone leave the room. But she just nodded in agreement, turning slightly to get closer to the still glowing fireplace. Since she wasn’t looking, Jihoon took a moment to stare before he left. He looked at the curve of her hip, letting his eyes travel to her chest and up to her clavicle. A sheen layer of sweat covered her. His eyes stayed looking at her face for a while. She wore a slight smile. It might have been a trick of the light, but Jihoon decided that he’d still let himself believe that she was smiling.

After cleaning Y/N up with a warm towel, Jihoon wrapped her up in blankets and laid down next to her. She had fallen asleep, probably too tired to stay awake any longer. The fire was burning bright again, as he had just put in an extra log in the furnace. More importantly, she was warm. Her back faced him, and being protected from her gaze made him more confident. Jihoon wrapped his arms around her waist and put his head by her shoulder. If he stayed very still, he could hear her soft breathing. Wrapping his arms even tighter around her in an attempt to pull her even closer, he pressed his nose against her neck. She smelled like a summer morning, when the air is slightly chilly and dewy - like the flowers had woken up from a nap and decided to share their fragrance with the rest of the world. Jihoon felt at home here. He was so lost in her that he hadn’t realized that she was stirring awake.

“You’re squeezing me,” she mumbled.

Jihoon’s grip immediately loosened, and he muttered out a shy apology. Y/N turned in his arms, now facing him. Her arms snaked up his shoulders and wrapped around his neck. As if it was in his nature, his head fell back into the crook of her neck. He could hear her chuckle, he could feel the vibrations from it in her chest. She didn’t comment on it, only threading her fingers through his hair.

“When was the last time you had a haircut?” she asked.

“Too long ago…” He sighed and looked up at her again. “Do you not like it?”

She took a good look at it, studying his hair like it was a rare artifact locked away in a museum. When she reached out to him, he immediately closed his eyes and leaned into her touch. With careful fingers, she brushed a few strands of hairs out of his face.

“I like it,” she said. “I think that short hair would suit you too, though… then again, I wouldn’t have as much to play with if it was short.”

“So?” He opened his eyes a crack. “Should I keep it long?”

“I think so.”

“Then I will.”

Her hand was cupping his cheek, and Jihoon put his own hand on top of it. Turning his head slightly, he kissed her palm before closing his eyes again. Y/N put her head under his chin, wrapping her arms around his torso. Jihoon drew small figures on her back with his fingers until they both fell asleep.

Jihoon woke up with a stiff back from sleeping on the floor. But he couldn’t find it in himself to complain when he saw Y/N still laying in his arms. He pulled her closer as much as he could without waking her. His fingers brushed against something on her back… it felt like tree bark. Jihoon shuffled around as carefully as he could, and turned Y/N to lay on her back. A spot of tree bark had formed on her back.

“Jihoon?” she mumbled. “What is it?”

“... your back. It’s…”

He paused, and Y/N brought her hand to her back. A sad sigh escaped her lips. She stretched and sat up, bringin the blanket up to cover her chest. When she wouldn’t look at him, Jihoon knew that something was wrong.

“This always happens when I don’t want it to.” She paused, and found the courage to look at him. “I can’t keep my human form forever.”

Jihoon’s heart sank. He reached out to hold her hand, but she pulled it back - looking closer at it, he could see that there was tree bark forming there too.

“What will happen to you?” he asked, already knowing the answer.

“I’ll go back to my glade, and turn back into a tree… and you’ll stay here and continue your life until the next time you get to see me.”

“And how long will that be?”

“I don’t know… it’s been a while since I’ve been able to make myself visible to humans,” she explained, “I can take a mobile form without turning human, but I will only look like a gust of wind to humans. Something happened when I met you in the glade, something that hasn’t happened in a while.”

Jihoon didn’t know what to say. She’d be able to wander around in this second dimension that she was speaking of, being able to see but not be seen. He put his hand on top of hers, not caring about the patches of bark steadily growing there.

“Take me with you,” he said.

“What?”

“I want to join you, help you watch over the forest.”

A plan was set in motion - a hasty plan, but it was all that they had time for. They would go back to the glade, and Jihoon would hold Y/N’s hand as she went through her transformation. It wasn’t just a physical transformation, but a spiritual one as well. The hope was that Jihoon would follow her to her spiritual realm, where he would be able to stay with her. Duke was supposed to stay with one of Jihoon’s distant friends, but when the time came to leave he refused to get into the car. It was clear that Duke was ready to go with them.

There was not much time. They only brought the clothes on their backs, and hurried to the glade. Y/N sat on Jihoon’s back, too stiff to make any quick movements, and Duke was running ahead of them. The forest was lenient, letting them pass through without any roots or bushes in their way. Jihoon had always felt welcomed by the forest, but now it felt like he was a part of it.

The glade looked the same as it did the first time he was there. In the familiar surroundings, Jihoon let his shoulders drop and his muscles relax. He brought Y/N to the spot where no grass would grow, her feet already starting to change. Duke rested against her legs, and Jihoon grabbed her hand.

“You’ll really stay with me?” she asked.

“Forever,” he answered.

Her hand was warm and clammy, gripping his tightly. Jihoon closed his eyes. Take a moment. Breathe in the cold air, smell the trees and the wet moss. This is home. Take a moment, and clear your head. Whisper out a silent prayer for good luck for the rest of your life.

When Jihoon opened his eyes again, Y/N was still standing in front of him and Duke was still by his feet. She hadn’t turned into a tree, neither had he. But when she moved to embrace him, he saw an apple tree standing behind him. Jihoon held his hand out in front of him. If he looked closely, his skin was slightly sheer. Looking at Duke, he could see the same sheer effect on his fur. It hadn’t felt like anything at all, as if he was completely embraced by the forest even before he took her hand. Y/N’s grip around him loosened, and he turned from her to look around himself. It was the same forest he had lived in all this time. The trees looked the same, the red leaves on the ground looked the same, but everything was different. He could hear every sound of the forest - the growing and the dying - and he came to understand how everything was in constant movement, yet simultaneously completely still.

“Welcome home,” she said.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

No one ever figured out what happened to Lee Jihoon. Some say that he just moved, but the truck in his driveway and his things still where he left them says otherwise. The first few weeks there were search parties in the woods, but people soon realized that he hadn’t gotten lost either. It was a mystery that was just accepted.

As time moved on, his disappearance became more of a legend than anything else. A children’s tale to make sure that your kids didn’t get lost in the woods, or disrespect the forest. For if you ever dare do something that you shouldn’t, don’t be surprised if you hear the howl of a big dog as dark as the midnight sky. And if you ever get lost, look for the wind that seems to blow even in the densest parts of the forest. If you ask nicely, the protectors of the forest will take you in as well - but don’t think they’ll show you mercy if you try to cause even the slightest harm to their woods.

#svthub #svthub.collab #seventeen #svt #lee jihoon x reader #lee jihoon #jihoon x reader #woozi #seventeen woozi #seventeen fluff #svt fluff #kpop fanfiction #kpop fanfic #smut #angst #fluff #woozi fluff #bee buzzed εїз✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

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bothsinfulandsweet · 1 year

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yesterday's punishment🐖

after my last stuffed i decided to take a day off, specially since most of my feeders didn't seem to be around, so i skipped lunch and dinner.

bith my king and my master were very mad at me for that and mademme eat a lot to compensate. lunch was 4 large bacon swiss burgers and an oreo shake.

it went down easy since i was starving from the day before so i was ordered to have 2 boxes of mac n cheese on top. it was really hard and i fell into a food coma before i could finish but i did it eventually.

then dinner was burguers ans milkshakes (again. ive eaten more burgers ans milkshakes in the past weeks than ever before in my life)

2 quarter pound double cheeseburgers, loaded chili cheese fries, onion rings, 10 little cinnamon pastry dessert things and 3 milkshakes. one i had to wake up at 2am to chug (plus a stick of melted butter courtesy of @bigger-rounder-better)

it was really hard to finish and my belly hurt soooo good

and even after that i had to go and eat a huge protein cookie and get on all fours for my feeder🐽🐖💕

went to bed incredibly full, heavy, and humiliated like im supposed to💞 knowing that i was going to swell up with fat from it and had to eat a lot again today

#sin&sweet #female feedee #fat pig #feedee girl #feed me #sumissive pig #mean feeders #gatting fat

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bored-storyteller · 11 months

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Here I am after months of absence. I hope you are all well. Things have happened, I don't have much to explain really. I don't know if this is my return, but I have some things that I wrote and never put here again so...occasionally, maybe something will show up.

I wish you all a happy life

Twisted Wonderland, Leona Kingscholar x reader

Brekfast

Leona sleeps. He sleeps a lot, now even more than usual.

He sleeps when he's fine, let alone when he's sick, when he's scared or under pressure. Even if he doesn't show it you know he still hasn't fully recovered from what happened, and it doesn't matter if it's even been months. It's not like he actually got to relax after the Overblot, it really wasn't a quiet time.

But today is Sunday, and you want to try to wake up the sleeping prince a little, to rekindle the will to live in him.

What an utopian thought, you tell yourself, but you want to try for him. If you fail at least you'll be there to watch over his sleep that encloses all the weight he has in him.

You still stop to look at that pile of blankets for a few moments, it rises and falls together with his breathing. His ears stick out from under the sheets, vibrate every now and then in small and rapid movements.

"Leona..." You murmur, without raising your voice too much; you know that deep down there's no need. A rattle rises, but no movement comes.

“Leona…” you call again, as you place the tray next to him. You know that hunger can wake him up more than you could.

It makes you laugh when the first thing that appears under the sun's rays penetrating through the shutters is his nose, which silently leans towards the scent of abundant roasted bacon.

Lots of meat, some eggs, some bread and butter, something sweet but not too much, juice as needed and more meat. Then next to his portions there is also what you like, because breakfast is for you two in theory, but you already know in principle that you won't touch food.

You give him time to emerge from his hiding place while you go to fully raise the shutters. He complains, but doesn’t articulate intelligible words.

Leona doesn't thank you, but his stomach does it for him, loudly. You laugh and he huffs as you sit on the edge of his bed.

"Good morning your highness!"

His green eyes dart at you grimly, but they don't linger long, preferring to return to the food as he carries the tray across his lap: "Are you in a good mood this morning?"

At least one of us has to try hard to be, you think, but you'd rather die than say it out loud.

“I just want to spend time with you, and today we have the day off, right?” Yours is obviously an attempt.

"I am tired." He replies with his mouth full.

Well, you shouldn't feel overly discouraged, after all you expected it. Be strong, be strong for him. He puts up with his tantrums because he's putting up with worse.

You watch him eat in silence, and slowly your positivity begins to wane, subjugated by a flood of doubts that you don't even know how to recognize.

Well, you can spend the day complaining to someone, the Heartslabyul guys stuck around, right? Or you could pay a visit to Scarabia, or one of the other dormitories. It's not that there aren't many ways to spend your days off there. You will return to Leona's in the evening. Maybe he will want to be with you more.

As you predicted, he doesn't bother advancing what you like, but you can't get mad, even if you're sorry about this. You wonder if he sees how much you are trying to make him better, how worried you are about him, and how afraid you are of only making it worse.

Does he know you love him?

And at that moment, he unexpectedly looks at you, catches you off guard like a good predator. He stands still as he watches you, suddenly sentient.

The state he finds you in is different from what he expected: you seemed so happy this morning, but now it looks like you are about to break. He sees your doubts gathering in your eyes and he's almost mesmerized by it, because he realizes you've hidden them from him so well up until that moment.

You, always careful not to hurt his pride with your concern, yet always, constantly feeling sorry for him. How could he not notice?

You clear your throat and escape him, trotting back around his room as if nothing had happened. He watches you sort through his clothes and his belongings that he doesn't even remember he has.

He looks at the now empty plates and sighs.

“Herbivore…” he calls you, setting aside blankets and tray to get up.

You hum back without turning around, as you fold a shirt left on a random chair.

"Little lion..." This time it's an experiment on his part, and your surprised smile somehow hurts him. He took you for granted, didn't he? He can't afford to hurt you too. He can’t face your happiness away from him.

“How long have I been part of your pride?” You ask him without being able to hold back that dig. His arm goes around your waist as his chin rests on your shoulder. You hear him swallow.

His voice is deep, still with a lethargic note that is slowly evaporating: “since when you are so hungry… I think I ate your breakfast too, didn't I?”

A slight smile opens on your lips: "well, I didn't stop you."

Who are you? What did you do with Leona?

For a moment he takes his time to look at your reflections drawn on the shiny mirror surface in front of you: you and him, you in his arms. You wanted this, he knows it.

“Let's go get something for you.”

You sigh, placing a hand on his cheek: "I don't like eating alone."

"I didn't say you will eat alone, I still have room."

You turn to look at him amused, but what you find is not an ironic, tired or bored look. His brows furrow as he holds you against him, he looks at you and for a second you think he's about to cry.

It's not like that, of course, but his eyes pour so much emotion into you that you think you can't hold those emerald irises anymore.

There is a murmur from him, but you don't understand. You want to ask him to repeat it, but before you can you are completely engulfed in him, and only three words are blown into your ear:

“You are my pride.”

#twisted wonderland #twst #leona kingscholar #leona x reader #leona kingsholar x reader #twisted wonderland leona #twst leona #twst x reader #twst fanfic #disney twst #disney twisted wonderland #fanficton #maybe was a request #reader insert #leona x you

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amasugiyuusaku · 8 months

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Ace Attorney Prosecutor Headcanons: Which Ones Would I Let Babysit My Child

What it says on the tin. Unhinged ramblings

Miles Edgeworth? No, probably not. It would depend on what point in the timeline, but likely a no. He is just too likely to get entirely absorbed in something and not notice your kid falling in the toilet or sticking forks into electrical appliances. Maybe for just a couple hours. It'd be funny to watch him playing, like, Candy Land.

Franziska Von Karma? Actually, depending on the kid, sure. I bet she's better with kids than you think. She would probably take them horseback riding or something really cool and rich person that they would remember forever. However she would also 100% make your kid tuna salad and when they complained about it, she'd be like THEN STARVE!

Godot? No. Nope. Absolutely not. He would literally immediately forget the child existed. If he did happen to remember he would forget they are a child and let them just like, attempt to fry bacon on the stove at age 5. The house would be burned to the ground when you got back and he would just be like How morbid a sight when the flames from Hell encroach upon our mortal plane. Almost as dark as my coffee

Klavier? Yes! Yes, absolutely! Klavier would be the kind of babysitter kids adore and call their friend. I mean come on who wouldn't love to hang out with a rock star while your parents are away? And bonus for the parents, he's actually responsible?? Fantastic. He would teach the kids to play guitar and they would write songs together and he'd put them all on an EP for their birthdays.

Simon Blackquill? For an older child, I actually wouldn't be too against it. He's snarky and not particularly tender, but he is a very caring person and I also think he would be enjoyable to converse with if you were old enough to keep up with him. He would put on old-timey samurai movies when they got tired of talking. Also, if a burglar broke in, he would absolutely kick that burglar's ass.

Nahyuta Sahdmadhi? Nope. No thank you. Those kids would be in bed with lights out at 7pm, all vegetables eaten, and crayons put away in the order of the rainbow, and the kids would HATE him for it. Definitely the type of sitter to pull out the big lectures when kids are misbehaving rather than save it for the parents to deal with. Also, I do NOT trust him not to make a child cry. Like what if the kid was like HEy wHy aReN'T yOu mArRieD yET??? You CANNOT tell me nahyuta wouldn't just be like Idk timothy, why do you still wear diapers? 🤭🤭oop! In his defense though he would absolutely play Candy Land with enthusiasm

Sebastian Debeste is the baby

Barok van Zieks? I can't decide. I think he would do his best but the unfortunate reality is that his sheer presence might traumatize a child for life. Also since he is from you know 20th century Britain I feel like his bar is kind of low for caretaking and he'd probably be like Oh yes i let her go across town a couple hours ago, i gave her money, she will be home before the sun sets! However at the same time I also feel like he's secretly a hobbyist cook and makes them a nice dinner and then afterward stokes a roaring fire in the hearth and reads Grimms' Fairy Tales

#ace attorney #hcs #headcanons #ace attorney headcanons #babysitting #miles edgeworth #franziska von karma #godot #klavier gavin #simon blackquill #nahyuta sahdmadhi #sebastian debeste #barok van zieks #this is so goofy

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sliceoflifebear · 6 months

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Welcome to the third installment @stick-weaponry Where you can submit and we rate/review sticks and talk about sticks.

Why?…Yes!

Now for todays stick, we got the heaviest one yet!

This one is bent at a nice angle and have a nice smoothness on one end. When using this, it reminded me of a Scythe in action. However it can be a unique sword or lightsaber.

Only downside is the angle feel a bit far off, and the smoother end seemed a bit too long. But still good to use.

9/10 This one is a keeper!

Feel free to submit pics of sticks you find to rate and review!

#stick #stick weapons #stick it to the man #my stick is better than bacon #sythe #sword #lightsaber #imagination #creativity #this blog helps folks escape from reality #scythe #stick weaponry #blog #rate #review

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petermorwood · 1 year

Video

youtube

Here’s a dish from French Cooking Academy, another of my subscribed YouTube channels.

I like the business of stuffing each chunk of beef with a bit of garlic and bacon; I’ve done this with lamb, using garlic and lemon. Another interesting detail is the use of cinnamon, suggesting a way-back-when influence either from the Moors or having access to spices as they passed through from Dpain Spain or North Africa on the way to somewhere else.

Kokkinisto (Greek) and Tajine (Morocco) also use cinnamon - and cloves, and nutmeg, and ginger etc. etc. depending on recipe. I’ve made both, they’re really excellent.

@dduane and I got Very Interested because the use of what Mum used to call “cake spices” is also quite medieval and, in DD’s case, adaptable for the Middle Kingdoms project.

The Corsican one recommends rigatoni, cannelloni or similar large hollow pasta (presumably to hold lots of sauce!) For a more medieval approach I’d try Loseyns from late-1300s cookbook “The Forme of Cury” (that’s “cookery” without the k, so “coo’rey” not “curry”.)

*****

These are often regarded as Richard II-era ”lasagne”, though I wonder if there’s also an association with heraldic “lozenges”, easily created by cutting a sheet of pasta dough slantwise...

Either way, here’s “Tasting History with Max Miller” (subscribed of course!) having a go at Loseyns, which turn out like mac & cheese with extra spices.

Max ended up eating them with a stick because forks hadn’t been introduced yet, but IMO a better utensil would be the historical eating pick, like one of these.

...or even a spoon, especially if the loseyns were cut small with that in mind.

However eating pasta with the fingers - like many other foods - may have been done in the 1300s; it was certainly recorded in paintings from the 1600s...

...right up to the 1800s...

...though I don’t think these were dressed with anything more than oil or butter and some grated cheese, and the potential for messy eating was still pretty high. Eating small pasta rather than dangly strands with the fingers was probably much tidier, especially if diners knew the proper etiquette for doing it...

Finally, here’s something from our own store-cupboard, bought out of curiosity during a recent visit to Polonez in Dublin.

This is pasta cut into little squares; both the front and the back of the pack calls them łazanka...

...and according to Google Translate, this just means “pasta noodles”.

However...

Can any followers tell me if "łazanka” has any relationship to “lasagna” or “lozenge”? An enquiring mind wants to know! :->

ETA: @seriously-mike says “...łazanki were brought to Poland in 16th century by queen Bona Sforza (so) the relationship with lasagna might be there.” See his Reply for more info.

ETA (2): A little bell went off in my head about the shapes in the bag and I suddenly remembered seeing them as something call “torn pasta” - the Italian word is “maltagliati“ - which were made using re-rolled scraps of dough from “formal” shapes; more info at that link.

#food and drink #corsican beef ragout #spices in cooking #medieval cooking #food and cooking of the middle kingdoms #French Cooking Academy #Tasting History #lasagne #pasta

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mivyts · 10 months

Note

Hey can i request a itoshi rin x reader where reader forces him to play roblox 🤡

"What are you doing?"

You look at Rin, who's borderline pouting at you.

"Playing." You barely spare him a glance before getting your eyes back on your laptop screen.

You're sitting cross-legged at the foot of the bed and facing Rin, who has his back against the headboard.

"Come to bed."

"I am on the bed." You answer, simply.

"Come to sleep." He says, and tugs on one of your feet.

"Rin!" You whine, ticklish. "Wait for this game to get over, it's literally do or die right now."

You know him enough to know that he's got a deadpan look on his face without even peeking at him.

He comes to sit beside you, leaning against you and watching you play. He watches impassively as your character jumps around, trying to stay alive.

"What's this game called?" He asks.

"Outlaster. But it's on Roblox, which is the actual game. It's like...a game in a game."

"What?"

You huff. "You'd be able to understand if you just downloaded the game. We could even play together." You give him a pleading look, casually dropping a hint.

He raises an eyebrow at you, "Is that you?"

He squints at your character in the middle of the screen, dolled up in a silly hat and other things you could afford to get without robux.

"...Yes."

A smile tugs at his lips and you're just the tiniest bit of embarrassed.

"See, it's so cool!" You bring your laptop closer and show him as you play. You explain how Outlaster works and then continue on saying, "And there's like a million more games we can play."

He hums, "Maybe."

"Please?" You frown just the right amount to get him in your palm and then in a few seconds he's caving in with a sigh.

"Fine."

You smile widely as you cheer and give him a kiss on the cheek. His cheeks tint pink. You love that even after being with him for so long, he's still shy sometimes.

He's quiet for the next few minutes until he says, "Now what?"

You look at him to see he's pointed the screen of his phone in your direction, so that you're able to see Roblox opened up.

"Make an account, silly. Then add me."

He goes back to typing on his phone. You look up when you hear a noise of frustration. He's staring angrily at his screen that says the username rinitoshi is taken.

You laugh when he mutters "Why do people use names that aren't theirs..."

"It's not funny!" He sounds genuinely offended.

"You're right, Rin. Sorry." You're still smiling. He shoots you a look from the corner of his eye.

You're concentrated on an intense obby when he speaks up again,

"Okay I'm done, let's play."

You gasp, and hit escape immediately. You leave your Outlaster game and turn to him. "Show me, show me!"

You snicker at his username. "Beststriker, really?"

"It's the truth." He states. You don't disagree.

You search his profile up and quickly add him as a friend. He observes as you hum while searching for a game that the two of you can play together.

"Oh my god." You say, when you spot the perfect game. You join a server and tell Rin to do the same.

"How?"

"It'll come under my name just wait."

When he sees the game that popped up under your profile, he says, "...Are you serious?"

"Please, just join! It's so fun, I swear."

When you see his bacon-head character load onto Sanrio Plushie Tycoon 2, you can't contain your giggles.

"How do you play?" He asks, ignoring the way you seem to be making fun of him.

You explain the game to him, and he gets it in no time. About twenty minutes later, you check the leaderboard with an agape mouth.

"What the fuck. Have you played this game before, Rin? How do you have so much money already?" You exclaim.

"It's just too easy for me." He says.

His tongue sticks out of his mouth just barely, as he concentrates on moving his character around to step on the platforms that lets him buy things. He's gotten far ahead of you in the game, even though you had previous saved progress.

"See, I'm better than you. This is why you shouldn't have made fun of me." He frowns at you.

"I was joking, Rin! You know I love you, right? Tell me your secrets, please..." You plead.

He proceeds to step on not one, but two plushie upgraders, skyrocketing his rate of earning money, all the while staring at you with a straight face. His mouth curls upwards when you whine about it.

"I'll tell you later."

"What do you mean, later?! Just tell me now!" You say, incredulously.

Later (he still hasn't revealed his secrets), you have to convince him to stop playing when your eyelids get too heavy. (He agrees only after you give him a kiss.)

When you're finally cuddled into him in bed, he asks, almost shyly,

"Can we play again, tomorrow?"

You smile. "Yes, please. I'm gonna burn your store down though, you're too good."

It's silent for a few seconds and you think he has fallen asleep until you hear his timid whisper,

"...Can you actually do that?"

#itoshi rin x reader #itoshi rin x you #itoshi rin #blue lock #bllk #bllk fluff #mivyts

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punkshort · 8 days

Note

Remember the 10 likes and dislikes you did for sheriff!joel?, would you consider doing it for Pornstar!joel? <33

Ok YES I love this and it was such a great mental exercise for myself because as I was thinking about my answers I came up with a few ideas for future chapters so thank you very much for the inspo!

Let's dive in, shall we?

Likes:

1. The rain: he loves it when it rains. He's not sure why. Maybe it's the smell, maybe it's the sound, but he just loves it.

2. His family/mom: as we discovered in chapter two, Joel cares very much for Mama Miller. Both he and Tommy are mama's boys, through and through, and even if he brushes off her advice at the time, he definitely takes it to heart.

3. Weddings: he may not be a marriage guy himself, but he loves going to weddings. He loves a good party and just simply loves love. It makes him happy to see other people happy.

4. Pool: he's gotten pretty good at it over the years, especially since Tommy became a bartender. He's been hanging out and all sorts of bars, waiting for his brother to get off work, and he's gotten a taste for pool. He's even won a few bucks off some drunks when they try to test his skill.

5. Sundresses: at the end of the day, Joel is still a man. And if he sees a pretty girl in a sundress, he's going to look twice. He can't help himself. Something about the ease of access and the air of innocence really gets him going.

6. Board games: Joel is competitive. Blame it on Tommy, but he loves a good board game and he really really loves to win. Doesn't matter what it is, Monopoly or Candy Land, he will give it his all and he will get super pissed off if he loses.

7. Sleeping in: Alright, he usually works late hours sometimes and he likes to sleep in. There's nothing like waking up naturally, letting the sun seep through his curtains and slowly rouse him from his slumber, and even better if he has a warm body next to him in bed.

8. Driving: He loves driving. He's not really into cars, per se, but he likes the act of driving. The open road, windows down, radio up... perfection.

9. Breakfast: He might like to sleep in but he will eat breakfast any hour of the day. Pancakes and bacon are his weakness.

10. Classic rock: Anything from the 70s will make him happy. He knows just about every hit and every band. Doesn't really care too much about current music, his radio is always tuned to classic rock.

Dislikes:

1. Leather sofas: Ok, the leather sticks to his skin and he doesn't like it. It gets hot in Texas and he hates the feeling of his skin unpeeling from a leather couch when he gets up. It's especially terrible when trying to hook up with a girl - the sound, the feel... it just kills the mood.

2. Snobs: People who think they're better than him or his friends/family can go to hell. He really dislikes snobby people, rich people, people who treat others differently, people who think their shit doesn't stink - can't stand it.

3. Drugs: Unfortunately in his line of work, he's seen a lot of his coworkers get sucked into drugs. He doesn't mind weed, but the harder stuff he can't stand. He's been in a handful of situations where it was obvious to him the girl he was working with got way too high before filming and it completely ruined the vibe for him. He doesn't like the idea of girls feeling like they need to get messed up to fuck him, but that's a whole other situation.

4. Cooking: He's terrible at it. He typically orders food in, gets something from work or heats something up from the freezer. If you're helping him, however, that changes things...

5. Sage: He can't stand the scent. It's too overpowering and it reminds him of his aunt's house when he was younger. A house that was most definitely not designed for children and more like a museum, where his mother would constantly scold him and Tommy, making sure they didn't touch anything breakable.

6. Olives: They are slimy and taste awful, and he will not be fielding any more questions on the matter.

7. Fake nails: He doesn't care if girls have their nails done professionally but the really really long, sharp ones freak him out. Especially when a scene partner has them and they are wrapped around his dick. He's always afraid one is going to accidentally stab him somewhere way too sensitive.

8. Blood: Joel gets woozy at the sight of blood. He doesn't know why, it's always been that way and Tommy has teased him about it for years.

9. Ties: Absolutely despises dressing up and wearing ties. It feels like someone's lightly choking him all day when he has to wear one. If he absolutely must, he always tries to make it as loose as possible without looking sloppy.

10. Golf: Because all my Joels hate golf. For no particular reason at all.

#ask #anon ask #roommates fic #pornstar!joel

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coughloop · 1 year

Note

tell us about your diner style breakfast. hash browns? sausage or bacon? inquiring minds need to know.

Just because I want to tall about my potato technique i will share this with you all NOT because you asked:

Simple good as hell diner breakfast for 2, including a meat, 2 eggs, potatoes and toast:

Meat:

Preheat oven to 400, evenly place 6 breakfast sausages on tin foil and bake for 10 minutes, flip and cook for another 5, turn on broiler cool for another 3, remove.

Preheat oven to 375, place 6-8 straps of bacon on tinfoil, cook for 7-9 minutes a side depending on preferred crisp level

Eggs:

Add butter to medium sized non stick pan, on 3/10 heat. Crack four eggs evenly around without breaking yolks, sprinkle evenly with salt, pepper, cayenne and paprika. Cover and let the steam cook the top of the eggs. Remove from heat once the whites have solidified and the yolks are still runny

Potatoes:

Peel one medium sized Russet potato, cut into bite sized pieces whatever that means to you, put in a non stick pan large enough that they can rest in one even layer. To the pan add ~0.75L of low sodium chicken stock or enough to cover the potato bites until they're almost almost submerged. Sprinkle salt overtop like youre seasoning water for pasta. Turn your stove to high heat and being to a boil. Once it begins to bubble turn the heat down like 2 notches and boil UNCOVERED for 5-8 minutes until potatoes are fork tender. Remove from heat and strain to remove any remaining stock (though most should have already evaporated away) and swirl the boiled potato chunks around in the strainer to rough up the edges and increase the potatoes surface area (better for catching seasoning you add at the end.

VERY IMPORTANT STEP: WASH THE PAN

If you don't at least rinse it before the next part all the starch in the residual stock left coating the pan WILL burn onto and create a layer of burnt potato crust and your homefries so they won't cook properly AND it'll be a bitch to clan off later. DO NOT SKIP THIS

Once your pan is washed and dried and your potatoes roughened up, place the pan back on medium heat and add olive oil and butter, enough to cover the bottom of the pan and allow the butter to melt. Add the potatoes to the hot butter and oil and stir to coat it, sprinkle in a bit of kosher salt, mix it all up again and spread until the potatoes are sitting in an even layer.

This is the point that instincts will have to guide you and I don't think i can give a step by step instruction. Your basically trying to evenly brown each side of the potato bites as much as possible without overcooking the inside or burning the outside. My general strategy is to let it it cook undisturbed until it feels like it's time to stir then giving them a toss to see if they are unsticking from the pan and repeating this process until they look like they're cooked just a tiny bit less than I want them to be, could take 4 minutes, could take ten, I still don't have a consistent method for this part down. Once they are just about ready, cut the heat and sprinkle in pepper, onion powder, garlic powder, and paprika (thanks chef john). Mix it all up (AGAIN: OFF HEAT) and serve!

Toast:

Toast that shit .

NOW SERVE

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callsign-magnolia · 8 months

Text

I Hope You Dance // Chapter 53

MATURE CONTENT (18+)

A/N: This is cross posted to my Wattpad, so if this seems familiar that is why!

TW: Mental abuse, emotional abuse, slight physical abuse, death and loss.

Description: When Caila meets Rooster, sparks fly. But, she's already married, to a man who she thought loved her, and won't let her go. Rooster will fight for her, he just has to convince Caila to fight for herself.

Word Count: 6.2k

Chapter 52 | Masterlist

I sat on Bradley’s bed the rest of the night, my fingers running through his curls and occasionally I placed kisses on his head. I took a picture and sent it to Mav, telling him he was awake and not to come till the morning. I would text and call everyone tomorrow, I don’t want too many people in here at once. That night I slept the best I had since he’d been in here. His arm stayed around my waist and my fingers in his hair as his head rested on my chest. The next morning I woke up to voices and turned to see Mav standing on the other side of the bed as Penny sat in the chair. “Oh, hey.” I said and sat up. “I guess you got a little more sleep than last night.” Penny said and I nodded. “I definitely did.” I said as I looked down at Bradley, kissing his head. “I’m starving.” He said, his head falling back on his pillow. “I’ll go see if you can have breakfast.” I said before getting up and making my way out to the nurses station. His day nurse, Ella, had been kind but quiet. “Hi.” I said and she looked over at me from her screen. “Good morning.” She said, “Um, Bradley was wondering if he could eat?” I asked and she looked back at the screen. “It says he can after some blood work and a CT scan. He was talking and I didn’t want to interrupt.” she said and I smiled. “Want me to ask?” I asked her and she nodded. I peeked my head in and he looked at me. “You can eat after blood work and a CT scan. Want her to go ahead and draw your blood?” I could see him pale slightly but he nodded. “He said yes.” She nodded and stood. “I’ll get everything ready.”

Within a few minutes she came back with a few tubes and a needle. “I have an IV in, can’t you get blood from that?” He asked and she shook her head. “There’s no blood return.” She said quietly as she got set up. “I really don’t wanna be stuck again.” He whispered to me. “I already have a tube sticking out of my chest and I’m scared to move.” He said and I felt for him. “One quick stick and then you're done.” I said and he turned his head into my chest and I squeezed his hand. “You’re still afraid of needles?” Mav laughed out. “Yes! I am okay!” He snapped and Mav just grinned. Ella got his blood drawn and removed the tube. “Now time for your CT.” She said. “I’ll be right here when you get back.” I said as I stood from the bed. He grabbed my hand, kissing it as Ella pushed the bed out of the room, his hand holding mine till the very last second. “I think he’ll make a great recovery.” Penny said, her hand rubbing Mav’s arm as he stood next to her. “Me too.” I said. He already seemed to be doing pretty good.

Bradley was gone for about an hour and just as he came in he was brought his food. “Eggs, bacon, french toast? Am I drooling?” He asked, looking up at me as I ran my fingers through his hair. “A little. Eat up.” I said and he did. “It can’t be that good. It’s hospital food.” Mav said and Bradley shook his head. “It’s actually really good.” He said, food still in his mouth. “Okay, no one's gonna take it from you and don’t talk with your mouth full.” I said and he swallowed. “Yes, mom.” He said. Soon Mav and Penny left and I took a shower in the bathroom attached to his room. “Oh I feel so much better.” I said as I came out, I looked at Bradley and smiled. He had Mr. Snuffles up on the bed with him, tucked into his left side and he read the card attached to the flowers mom sent. “Your mom send these?” He asked and I nodded. “She did. Her and dad were gonna fly out but there was nothing they could do so I managed to talk them into staying put.” He chuckled. “Should we call them?” He asked and I realized I never text anyone but Mav to say he was awake. “Sure. Let’s surprise them.” I said. I facetimed moms phone and it rang so long I thought she would never answer.

“Hell-OH!” Mom yelled when she saw Bradley grinning at her through the phone. “Oh thank god! DAVID!” She yelled and she rushed through the house. “What?! Something happen to Bradley?” He asked and my heart swelled knowing my parents care about him so much. Mom turned the phone towards him and it took dad a minute to register what he was seeing. “Wha- YOU SON OF A BITCH!” Dad yelled with a smile on his face. “Good to see ya, son!” He said, making us laugh. “When did you wake up?” Dad asked. “Yesterday evening.” He said. “We hadn’t told anyone but Mav till now.” I said. “What about the team?” Dad asked. “I’ll text them once I get off the phone with you. Bradley wants them to come in a few at a time. He doesn’t want them crowding.” I said and I turned to him. His eyes were drifting closed and I could tell he was exhausted still. “Well, we’ll let you go. Text us with updates, we can talk later.” Mom said and I nodded, letting her go. “Get some sleep, honey.” I said, kissing his head. His arm went around my waist and I smiled, knowing I wouldn’t be able to go anywhere any time soon.

Throughout the week the team came in to visit, all cheering and crying tears of joy to see Bradley awake. Cyclone even came in to speak with him. Bradley had been worried that he wouldn’t be able to fly again, but his doctor and Cyclone reassured him that he would be back in the skies but only after ten to twelve weeks. He was bummed about it, but it was all worth it if he made a full recovery. Come Saturday we were getting ready to go home. I packed all of our stuff, Bradley was dressed and ready, the only thing left is for the doctor to remove his chest tube. “You may have some slight discomfort as I remove this.” Rooster squeezed my hand and buried his face in my shoulder. The doctor cut the stitches and slowly pulled the tube out, a hiss escaping Bradley as he did so. “All done.” I could immediately tell a shift in Bradley, he seemed more relaxed, relieved. “Macy will be in with your discharge paperwork and care instructions in just a few minutes.” We nodded and he left. Roo sat up and swung his legs off the bed. He’s only been up a handful of times this week and he’s a little unsteady so I immediately reach for him. “Need help?” I asked and he shook his head. “No, I just need off this bed.”

He stood and stepped away, slowly wandering around the room. “Feels good to just use my legs.” He said, stretching his legs as he did so. I just watched him. There was a moment where I never thought I’d see him alive again, let alone up and moving. “What?” He asked, noticing that I was watching him. “I’m just glad you're okay.” I said, leaning back on my hands as I leaned against a table in the room. He smiled, walking over to me, his hands falling to my waist. “I told you, I’m not going anywhere.” He said before leaning down and kissing me. There was so much passion behind it, something we’ve been missing since he’s been in here. “I love you, Mags.” He whispered as he pulled away. “I love you too, Roo.” I wrapped my hand around his neck and kissed him one more time before Macy came in. “Alright. These are your care instructions.” She handed the packet to Rooster, he couldn’t get incisions wet for three more days, no physical exercise for six weeks. “The physical exercise also includes sex.” “WHAT?!” He asked loudly and I slapped my hand over his mouth. Macy tried not to giggle but one escaped. “Yes. No sex. It could increase your heart rate and your stitches could pop. If they pop, you’ll bleed out in minutes, before anyone can get there to help you.”

I turned to him and he looked at me with pleading eyes but I shook my head. “No sex.” I said sternly and he huffed. We went over the rest of the instructions before we signed the paperwork. “Thank you so much.” I said before pulling Macy into a hug. She seemed shocked but hugged me back. “You’re welcome.” She said before forcing Bradley into a wheelchair. “I can walk.” He said and she chuckled. “Hospital policy, I’m just doing my job.” She said and he pouted the entire walk to the front doors. Macy stood with him while I pulled the jeep up to the doors. Macy helped him in and soon we were off and headed home. “It’s weird being the passenger.” Roo said, reaching over and taking my hand. “Thank you.” He said, lifting my hand and kissing the back of it softly. “For what?” I asked, squeezing his hand slightly. “Staying. Not leaving me alone in there.” There was something in his voice. I couldn’t read it and that bothered me. We stayed quiet the entire ride home, the only noise being the road and the radio. Once we pulled into the driveway I put the car in park and turned to him. “You know I’d never leave you, right?” I asked and he nodded. “I do. But you easily could’ve sat here at home, waiting for a phone call instead of sitting in that uncomfortable chair.” I just smiled at him, sitting up and running my fingers through his hair. “I wanted my face to be the first thing you saw when you woke up. So I wasn’t going anywhere. Plus if anything happened I wanted to know immediately, not twenty minutes after the fact.” He just smiled at me, his hand gently gripping the hand in his hair and holding it. “I’m glad you were the first thing I saw. It sounds weird, but god I missed you.” I smiled, leaning down and kissing him. “I missed you too.”

I pulled away and slid out of the jeep. “Now, let’s get you inside. I’m hungry and I’m sure you are too.” I said as I opened his door. Thankfully the jeep doesn’t sit too high off the ground so he could easily slide out. “Your cooking sounds amazing.” He said before reaching into the back. “EH! You’re not allowed to lift anything over ten pounds!” I stopped him. “I got the bags, you just take your ass inside and sit down.” He huffed but didn’t argue. He did reach inside and grab my purse and the flowers, neither weighing more than ten. Pick your battles. He likes helping out, so I’ll let him do little things here and there. He’ll go crazy if I make him lay in bed all day. We got inside and the dogs lost their minds. “Sit.” Bradley said and both dogs immediately sat, tails going a mile a minute. Rooster set my purse by the door with the flowers before sitting on the floor. I put all of our dirty clothes in the washer and put everything else away before I went into the kitchen. Amelia ate a good bit of the food, mostly stuff that would go bad like sandwich stuff. I pulled out some chicken to put in the airfryer and some pasta. I seasoned the chicken lightly before tossing it in then prepped everything else.

As that cooked I walked back into the living room to find Rooster had moved to the couch, Dahlia’s head in his lap and Sadie curled up next to him. “How does chicken pesto pasta sound?” I asked as I leaned over the back of the couch. He turned his head to look at me, smiling widely. “It sounds so good.” I smiled and kissed him before coming around and sitting next to him. I grabbed his hand and leaned my head on his shoulder. “It’s good to be home with you.” I muttered, leaning up to kiss his cheek. “I agree, pretty girl.” Once dinner was done we sat down and ate just enjoying the time together. There was a moment that I thought I would never have time like this again. After dinner I got him settled upstairs in the bed and went to take my shower. “I wish I could take a fucking shower. Those sponge baths did shit to make me feel clean.” I felt bad for him. The man showers religiously and after a week, he probably does feel like shit. “Are you sure I can’t take a shower?” He asked and I sighed. “You heard Macy. You can’t get your incisions wet for three more days.” He huffed and leaned his head back. I could tell he was frustrated and I hated it. I turned and took notice of the giant jetted tub that we have yet to use.

“You know. If we’re really careful, you could take a bath.” He sat up immediately. “You think?” He asked and I nodded. “I’ll have to help you to make sure you keep your incisions dry.” He wiggled his eyebrows at me. “So you’ll get in with me?” He asked. “No. I will sit on the edge of the tub and help you, but I will not be getting in the water with you.” He pouted but slowly stood. No matter what he says, he knows he’s weak and he knows he has to be careful. “Why not?” He asked as he slowly walked by me. “Because, I know how you get when I’m naked and I will not have you dying in our bathtub.” I said, referring to the stitches in his aorta. “Fine.” He huffed. “At least help me get undressed? It hurts if I lift my arm too high.” I gave him a small smile and nodded. I helped him carefully pull his shirt off and helped him with his pants before starting the water. I didn’t let it get too high, not wanting the water to reach the incision on his left side where his chest tube was.

Once I turned off the water I helped him in and he sat down. “Just being in the water feels nice.” I smiled, brushing his hair back. “I love you.” He said as he looked up at me with those big brown cow eyes. “I love you too.” I leaned down and kissed him gently before I carefully helped him wash his body and his hair. Once we were done I could see he felt better, more relaxed. “My turn. Go lay down and I’ll crawl in bed with you once I’ve had my shower.” He smiled and leaned down, kissing me softly. “Okay.” He whispered and walked into the bedroom while I cut the shower on. I washed away all the stress of the last few days. It was nice to be home, in my own shower, knowing my fiance was peacefully laying in bed waiting for me. Once I was done I dried off and slid into one of Bradley’s t-shirts before walking into the bedroom.

There, lying on the bed was Bradley. He was on his back, arms outstretched as his chest slowly rose and fell. I smiled and made my way over to the bed. I pulled the covers back, moving his arm before I slid in. “Mm, honey?” I couldn’t help but grin as I curled into him, my hand resting on his chest, right next to his incision. “I’m right here.” I whispered. His arm curled around my shoulder, pulling me close before he drifted back off to sleep. I just laid there, taking in everything. This was real. He would live. We would get to sleep next to each other, have meals together… we still get to have our wedding. Losing Rooster was a hard concept to grasp, but never being able to marry him made my chest ache. It felt as if someone took their hands and pulled my rib cage apart before reaching in and ripping out my heart. Part of me wanted to stay awake, soak in every moment of this, to know it was real. But his even breathing made me sleepy and soon, I was drifting off to sleep right next to him.

The next day we were lazy. Roo got up and walked around the house, we took a short walk on the beach to get him up and moving, but other than that we laid on the couch and cuddled. Of course Mav called to check on him. That would become a daily thing for a while. I know Mav was terrified of losing him, and he has every right to be, but I think Rooster is already annoyed after the third call today. “I’m fine.” He said after he hung up with Mav. “I know.” I said as I rubbed his back. “But you aren’t acting like that.” I pursed my lips and nodded. “But I get to see you all day, touch you, talk to you. All these things that solidify that you’re really here. Mav was… really scared. I think he’s still scared, scared that he’s going to call and you will never pick up.” I said and he sighed. “Maybe you call him tomorrow, or send him a meme every now and again. Something to help solidify that you’re still here and I’m sure he’ll calm down soon.” I said as my phone dinged. “Is it Mav?” He asked and I shook my head. “Penny. She’s apologizing for Mav calling so many times. She said she’s hiding his phone from him now.” Rooster chuckled. “He may just drive over here.” I nodded in agreement. “He really might.”

The rest of Sunday was spent in the kitchen. I was prepping stuff so Bradley could have easy and healthy lunches. Lots of protein and foods that would be good for his heart. He helped a little, getting tired easily so he would occasionally go nap or just rest. Going to bed Sunday night was easy. It was getting up Monday morning that was hard. It was storming outside, a very uncommon sight for San Diego. “You think you’ll be in the air much?” Roo asked as I pulled my hair back into a bun. “Knowing Mav? He’ll use this as an excuse for severe weather training.” Roo gave a light chuckle from the bed. “Probably.” He laid on his back, arm tossed over his eyes to shield them from the bathroom light. Once I was done I grabbed my flight suit and slid it on. “You gonna be okay today?” I asked and he nodded. “I’ll miss you.” I couldn’t help but grin and walk towards the bed, leaning over him as I got close. “I’ll miss you too.” He moved his arm and I kissed him gently. “But I will be fine. If I need you, I’ll call.” I nodded as I laced my boots up.

I went downstairs to get my coffee ready, Bradley and the dogs close behind. We silently went about our routine. Bradley let the dogs out and fed them while I got my coffee ready. “Okay. I love you, I will be home soon.” I said as I turned to him. He smiled down at me before leaning down and kissing me. “I love you too.” He followed me to the door, his own mug of coffee in hand before I opened the door. I turned for my bag, yelling as I saw him bend down to grab it. “You cannot lift anything heavy yet.” I scolded as I hoisted my bag over my shoulder. “Yes ma’am.” He sassed. “I’ll check in around lunch time.” I said before he kissed me one more time. “Okay, honey.” With that I walked out the door, pulling the hood of my rain jacket over my head. I quickly tossed everything in the jeep before practically diving in myself. Bradley stood on the porch waving as I backed out of the driveway. I waved back before heading off to work.

“Today you will be doing some severe weather training.” Mav announced in our morning briefing. “I told Bradley we’d be doing weather training.” I leaned over to Coyote as I whispered. “I want you in groups of threes. We’ll be practicing flight maneuvers.” We all nodded. “Dismissed.” With that we stood and made our way out to the hangar. First up was Phoenix and Bob, Fritz, and Coyote. I checked over my jet as they went up before Mav walked over. “How is he?” I just smiled at him before I sat in a chair. “Doing surprisingly well.” I answered. “No pain or anything?” He asked. “He’s on a lot of medication for pain and infections and everything in between. His incisions still look fresh and he’s dying for an actual shower.” Mav nodded and sat next to me. “I’m worried about psychological effects.” I nodded in agreement. “So far he sleeps like a baby. No nightmares, but I keep waking up intermittently to check on him.” He just nodded and smiled at me.

“I’m glad he has you.” Mav said, tossing his arm around my shoulder. “He wouldn’t be in this situation if it wasn’t for me.” “Don’t start that.” Mav snapped. “Stop blaming yourself for every little thing that goes wrong in your relationship. I’m tired of hearing it and so is Bradley.” I was stunned by his response. Mav has usually been level headed with a few exceptions. He sighed and it was silent for a moment. “Caila, I’m sorry.” I shook my head and stood. “No. You’re right.” With that I walked away. I couldn’t really be mad at Mav, he was right. But so was I. Soon it was my turn to get in the air with Hangman and Omaha and Halo. We were doing so good. “Get him off me, Magnolia!” Omaha called out. “Hang in there! I’m coming!” Just as I almost had Hangman in my sights, lightning struck way too close for comfort. We had multiple other lightning strikes that followed. “Should we land?” I asked through the comms. The rain was splattering against my canopy, making visibility next to nothing. “You’re team leader Magnolia. That’s your call.” Another lightning strike and I made my decision. “Everyone bring it in.” We all landed one by one, my landing last as I wanted everyone else to land before me. As soon as I got my jet onto the tarmac, I was out and rushing inside. “I’m already sick of this rain.” I said as I stormed past Mav and Phoenix, soaked to the bone.

I didn’t shower on base, deciding it wasn’t worth it. The rain hasn’t let up all day and after work was no different. I hit a stupid amount of traffic on the way home and by the time I actually got there, I just wanted to curl up with Rooster. I made it inside, bringing in just a little water and not a whole damn puddle and as I set my bag down I saw Rooster napping on the couch. He looked so peaceful. He was lying on his back, one arm tossed back behind his head, the other resting on his belly. As I stepped closer I was startled by Sadie who poked her head out from under the blanket. “Keeping daddy company?” I asked, reaching down and petting her before she laid her head on his leg. I left Bradley asleep as I went upstairs and showered. He needed his sleep. Sleep would help him heal and a lot of the medications he’s taking right now make him sleepy. Once I was done, I found he was still asleep as I came downstairs. I needed to figure out dinner so I went into the kitchen and started rummaging around. I decided to just grill some chicken, brown rice and lots of fresh veggies. Most of it is good for his heart and I wanted him to feel as good as possible as quickly as possible.

When dinner was almost done I went to wake him. I sat next to him on the couch, smiling at how peaceful he looked. I brushed some of his curls back gently and he inhaled deeply. I kissed his forehead, his cheeks, his chin and as I kissed his eyebrow his eyes opened. “Mm, hi honey.” He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into him. “Careful, Roo.” I said, pulling away slightly. “I just wanna hold my fiance, is that too much to ask?” He groaned and I chuckled. “No, but I don’t wanna hurt you.” He smiled up at me as his hand threaded through my hair. “You never could.” He pulled me down into a kiss and I couldn’t help but relax into it. After a minute I pulled away. "Dinners almost ready." I told him and he inhaled deeply. "Okay, I'll be in the kitchen in a minute." I stood and held out my hands, helping him up gently. His face scrunched as if he was in pain as he stood. “When was the last time you had any medicine?” I asked and he looked at his watch. “Five hours ago.” I pursed my lips. “I’ll set out your medicine with dinner.” I said before standing on my toes and kissing his cheek.

I plated everything and set all his medications out on the island and he came in just as I put all my food on my own plate. He was rubbing his chest just around his scar. “Here.” I slid some water to him as he sat down. “Thanks.” He muttered before taking the handful of pills and swallowing them with the water. I smiled before sitting next to him with my own food. “How was your day?” He asked as he cut into the chicken. “Long. The rain never stopped and we had to end our exercise early because of all the lightning. I was soaked all day.” He chuckled. “Kind of glad I wasn’t there to endure that.” He said and I glared at him. “I love you but you get cranky if you get soaked from the rain.” He said, grinning before he leaned over and kissed my cheek. “You’re not wrong.” I replied. We talked and ate and once we were done poor Bradley looked like he would fall asleep. “C’mon. Let’s get you in bed.” I said quietly as I cut off the kitchen light. He slowly got up and I wrapped my arm around his waist. “I really want another bath.” He muttered and I sighed. Bradley is a man that showers every day and I can’t really tell him no. “Okay. We’ll get you a bath and then bed.”

We made it up the stairs and he sat on the toilet as I pulled out some towels for him and cut on the water. “Will you get in with me?” He asked as I leaned over. His hands rested on my hips and pulled me back till I stood between his legs and he rested his forehead on my back. “I’ve already showered.” I answered. “Please.” I let out a slow breath. I wanted to tell him no, but then I remembered how close I came to losing him. “Okay.” I could feel him smile against me. We both stripped and I helped him in before getting in and sitting on the opposite side, facing him. He gave me a small smile as I tossed my legs over his. “We should make use of this bathtub more often.” He said, leaning his head back and winking at me. “Mhm, I know what you want to use it for.” I said with a smile. “You can’t tell me that you don’t want to use it for the same thing!” He said as he leaned forward, gripping my thighs and hauling me into his lap. I gasped loudly. I knew he wouldn’t let me go so I helped slide myself into his lap, not wanting him to overexert himself. “You shouldn’t do that.” I scolded him.

“I didn’t hurt myself, so don’t worry.” I huffed, shaking my head. “I’ll always worry about you.” He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me as close as he could get me, my forehead resting on his. I smiled at him, my thumb running across the scars on his jawline. “I love you.” I whispered and he grinned. “I love you too, pretty girl.” I kissed his lips gently before I sat up. “We should probably get you washed up before the water gets cold.” He nodded and I leaned back, grabbing the soap and a rag. His arms stayed around me as I lathered the soap across his body. “I did something today.” He blurted out. I raised a brow at him. “What’d you do?” I asked, carefully cleaning around his incision. “I made some changes to my life insurance policy.” I stilled. “What?” I asked, my eyes moving to his. “When I met Nat and we became friends, she was the beneficiary. I knew she’d use it to pay off any funeral debts if it came to that. When we got together I never really thought about it. But after what happened, I didn’t want you to have to worry about anything.” I stared at him for a moment. I dropped the rag and my hands drifted up to the sides of his neck. “Bradley. I don’t want your money.” I said and he nodded, one hand coming up and lightly holding my wrist. “I know, honey. I know. But if something does happen to me I just want the peace of mind knowing that you’re taken care of. Just to know that finances is one thing you won’t have to worry about makes me feel better.”

I sighed, tears coming to my eyes. “Financial ruin doesn’t matter. Because if you’re not here I don’t know how I’d go on living.” He furrowed his brows, his handscoming up to my own cheeks. “Hey, don’t say that.” I shook my head. “It’s true though. When you were in the hospital I had this god awful dream.” I took a deep breath, willing the tears away. “You died. You didn’t make it. Mom was helping me get ready for your funeral.” My breath caught in my throat and he shushed me. “Hey, I’m here.” I shook my head. “Seeing you in a casket Bradley, even in my dream I just wanted to die.” I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and held him tightly. “It’s okay. I’m here and I don’t plan on going anywhere for a long, long time.” He said as he pressed a kiss to my neck. His words sat heavy on my chest and only one thought crossed my mind, and I’m sure it crossed his. Goose didn’t plan on going anywhere for a long, long time either. I didn’t dare say it out loud, but we both knew it. Anything can happen in our jobs, even outside of it. Once I calmed myself, I sat back and wiped my cheeks.

“Come on. Let’s finish up and get in bed.” He said and I nodded. We finished in the bath and finally got out. Rooster slid into some boxers and I slid on some panties and one of his old Phillie’s shirts. With that, we climbed into bed, his arm going around my waist and pulling me into his side. “You’re gonna have to stop pulling me, I definitely weigh more than ten pounds.” I said and he chuckled. “I’d pop a stitch for you anyday.” He said, turning on his side and nuzzling his nose into my cheek. “Well let’s not do that. Remember what Macy said?” I asked, closing my eyes and resting my hand on his chest. “Yes, honey. I remember.” He huffed and then it went quiet. Within minutes Rooster was out like a light and I wasn’t far behind him.

The next morning I got up and left early, deciding I needed to hit the gym. I left Rooster a note just so he didn’t worry. I walked into the gym, immediately heading for the weights and saw Hangman on the leg press. “Mornin’.” He grunted out. “Mornin’.” I replied quietly. Hangman finished as I headed for the leg curl machine. I got set up and started. “You okay?” Hangman asked as he finished his set and stood up. “Hm? Oh, yeah. I’m just tired.” I replied. “How’s Rooster?” He asked. “He’s okay. Sleeping a lot. He can finally get his stitches wet today so I know as soon as I walk through the door he’ll be begging for a shower.” Hangman scrunched his face. “Has he not bathed since he came home?” I giggled. “Yes, he has. But it’s been baths and the man showers daily. He’s begged me every night since he came home for a shower.” He nodded. “Why can’t he just take one when he gets up?”

I shook my head. “If the shower gets too hot, which is likely because he loves steaming showers, he can pass out. I’d rather be home so if anything happens I can get to him.” He nodded. “He hasn’t… hasn’t had any nightmares has he?” I shook my head. “No. I hope he never does, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he did. It was all so traumatic. I’ve been waking up at least twice a night to check on him.” He gave me a small smile. “Worried?” He asked and I nodded. “Worried something will happen in the middle of the night and when I wake up he’ll be dead.” I finished my reps and sat up. “He told me last night that he changed the beneficiary to his life insurance policy. He changed it to me because after what happened he was worried I wouldn’t be taken care of.” I chuckled. “As if that would happen.” Hangman chuckled and agreed. “Well what matters is he’s still here and on the mend.” I nodded as he pulled me into a side hug.

We finished working out and I showered before getting ready in my flight suit. We went through the motions of the day, sitting in lectures, going through simulations and flight training. Finally when the end of the day came, I didn’t bother showering in the locker room and just made my way home. Like I predicted, Rooster was standing in the living room in only his boxers when I got home. “Hi honey.” He seemed tired but happy to see me. “Hi, why are you up?” I asked. “I was waiting on you to get home so I could shower.” He had a large grin on his face. “I figured you would be. Just didn’t expect you to be standing in the living room waiting on me.” I said as I set my bag on the floor. “Have you had a shower yet?” He asked, coming closer and resting his hands on my waist. “I knew you’d ask so I purposefully drove home without one.” He grinned and laced his fingers through mine. “C’mon honey. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

He grinned at me as he pulled me upstairs towards our room. He slowly unzipped my flight suit, his lips attached to mine. “Don’t get worked up now.” I told him. “You’re only telling me that because you’re getting worked up.” He said before attaching his lips to the skin just below my ear. “You’re right, I am.” I said as I stepped out of my flight suit. We finished stripping and Rooster got into the shower. The water was warm, but not too hot. Bradley carefully washed his incision and I helped him wash everywhere else. “I never thought a shower could feel so amazing.” He said, standing under the shower head. I smiled, running my hands through his hair, washing out the shampoo. “I’m just glad you feel so good today.” He nodded. “I feel better today than I have since it happened.” I gave him a tight smile. “That’s good.” Bradley lathered my body with soap before helping me wash my own hair. It was quiet, sweet even. When we got out he helped me make dinner and we ate, curled up on the couch. “Bradley?” I asked after we were done eating. I was laying down on the couch, him between my legs with his head on my stomach. “Yeah, pretty girl?” He asked. “I love you, so much.” I said, running my fingers through his curl. He buried his face in my stomach, his mustache tickling my skin as he smiled. “I love you too, pretty girl. So much more than you could imagine.” He said before placing a kiss to my stomach.

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