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#miss serenity are you fine
magiaburst · 1 year
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"Hey, we need a track to celebrate our Sailor Moon reboot!"
and then they went hard
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Spero di non sbagliare con te ….
Perché non me lo perdonerei ,perché non riuscirei a sopportarlo ….
Perché per una volta sono felice e tu ne sei la causa ❤️‍🩹
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avis-writeshq · 6 months
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03 — labyrinth
summary: “uh oh, i’m falling in love”/“thought the plane was going down, how’d you turn it right around?” pairing: spencer reid x bau!fem!reader genre: best friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, fluff, angst, slow burn, mutual pining warnings: drug usage & addiction, talks about relapsing, therapy, tobias hankel, talks about weight (not reader’s), panic attack/night terrors wc: 3.8k a/n: as always, special mention to @astrophileous for beta-reading SPARKS FLY MASTERLIST // MAIN MASTERLIST
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“Are you okay?” The words tumble out of your mouth before you can stop them, and you gently lay a hand on Spencer’s forearm. You offer a soft squeeze of reassurance, your gaze meeting his. 
He nods dismissively, averting his eyes but not shrugging your hand away. His tone is cold as he responds, “I’m fine.” 
You know better than to believe him. Ever since his kidnapping a few short weeks ago, he’s been acting strangely. His eyes are sunken, bloodshot most of the time, with dark bags beneath them. He’s lost weight, not that he wasn’t already skinny to begin with, but he’s thinner than usual. He gets distracted more easily, he doesn’t spout out about random facts or statistics, and he’s now almost always irritated about something. 
He’s been spending more and more time at your apartment, not that you don’t blame him. The two of you would spend your mornings at the dining table, eating half-stale cereal and sipping coffee from the premium machine you splurged on a couple years ago. The closeness is nice, and at times it feels a little too domestic to be platonic, but you’ve learned to control yourself around him. 
You open your mouth to say something else (you’re mainly hoping to call him out on his behaviour), but he moves his other hand on top of yours, lightly pressing your fingers. Your mouth goes dry and your cheeks flush at the contact, effectively making you go quiet. He glances at you, his face softening and for a moment you could have sworn you saw the ‘old Reid’ resurface.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers into your ear, his voice wavering with each syllable. “I’m fine. I promise.”
Even before you were a profiler, you prided in being able to read people well. Spencer is no exception to this; he’s always been easy to read, and his tells are only obvious to the trained eye. In other words, in your long five years of knowing him, you could smell his lies from a mile away. You don’t comment on it, just allowing yourself to bask in the comfort of his touch and the warmth he exudes. 
The two of you head off to work minutes later, climbing into your car with you in the driver’s seat. He holds your hand the entire time. 
*** 
Spencer thinks he’s going to throw up. The moment he gets onto the plane, he thinks he’s going to hurl. He locks himself into the bathroom, fumbling with the little vials of clear liquid in his satchel. He doesn’t know how long he can keep this a secret for– he’s always been a bad liar– especially from a team of profilers. He gathers that they probably already know.
His vision blurs and his head grows foggy as soon as he feels the liquid enter his bloodstream. He squeezes his eyes tightly, relishing in the artificial feel of serenity when there’s a knock on the door.
“Uh… Spencer?”
Fuck, he wants to scream as he scrambles to put everything back in his bag. Not you. Anybody but you.
“In– in a minute,” he responds hurriedly, flushed and woozy from his high. He feels nauseous again and he wonders if he should actually just throw up to make the story more believable.
“Um, okay? I was a little worried; you’ve been in there for a while. Did you need anything?” You ask again through the door as quietly as possible, glancing at where the team were sitting. “Water? Tea?”
He swings the door open, and his voice is a lot harsher than he expected it to be. “I’m fine.”
He almost misses the way you step back uncertainly, and the way your fingers twitch at your side. Almost. He knows you don’t believe him. He knows that you know him better than anyone and at times it scares him. He feels like Pandora’s Box and it’s only a matter of time before you release the demons within him. His heart lurches as he watches the way your face falls into confusion and hurt– hurt that he is responsible for. 
“I’m fine,” he repeats, softer now. “Just– just tired.”
He watches as you pause and give him a once over. His breath hitches in his throat as he feels your eyes over every inch of him, and for a second he feels incredibly exposed. 
“You know you can talk to me, right?” You say slowly, cautiously, and you reach a hand out to gently graze against his forearm. “I’m here for you.”
The contact is enough to get him to calm down, and his shoulders visibly relax and his eyes close for a moment. He nods, looking at you with a softness he didn’t even know he could muster.
“I know,” he responds, touching his fingers to yours. “Thanks.”
“Anytime,” you respond with a smile, but it doesn’t reach your eyes. You pause for a moment before nodding towards the seats of the plane. 
Spencer follows you there, sitting beside you and as he relishes in your warmth and, in your company, he doesn’t feel quite as lost. The nausea begins to dissipate and he suddenly feels a lot lighter– and it’s not because of the drugs. This is different, a better different. A different he could get used to. The pressure from the plane doesn’t seem to affect him as much anymore, and his ears are no longer ringing. 
He leans into your touch, his head pressed against your shoulder and his eyes begin to close. He feels your fingers gingerly hold his own, squeezing lightly in an effort to help him relax. It works. It always works. He feels the way your thumb grazes against the back of his hand and he feels both full of air and breathless at the same time. 
“You okay?” You ask into his hair, continuing to rub your thumb back and forth against his hand. 
He nods, not being able to bring himself to speak. He’s tired, so unbelievably tired, and he thinks that if he speaks he’ll begin to cry. He doesn’t realise that his grip on your hand has tightened.
“I’m not going to leave you.” He hears you whisper, squeezing his hand back.
He only brings himself to nod again, trying desperately to ignore the way his heart flutters in his chest. Uh oh. He’s falling in love.
***
Spencer knocks on your door at half past two in the morning, eyes bloodshot and feeling as if he was suffocating. He doesn’t want to be alone. At least, he doesn’t right now. He would usually enjoy the feeling of solace, considering that it was unlikely he would be able to experience those moments, but lately it feels as though he is lost inside of his own mind. He misses the moments where his head would swirl with unnecessary statistics, or random animal facts that he knows you adore. Now, the only thing stuck in his mind is the rush of the high– and the plummeting feeling of the low.
He holds a breath as he watches your feet come to a stop at the door before the doorknob jiggles and opens. His eyes hesitantly meet yours and he swallows thickly. 
“Can I come in?” He asks, the words barely a whisper. 
“Yeah,” comes your response, and you open the door a little wider. “Yeah, Spence, of course.”
He watches as you boil water and prepare two cups of tea– one chamomile and the other peppermint. He sits on the couch, fiddling with his fingers and his eyes darting around nervously. 
“Spencer.”
Your voice echoes through the room, and suddenly he feels very grounded. He forces his eyes to meet yours and he feels himself stop breathing. Have you always been this beautiful?
“You haven’t been yourself lately,” you say, setting down the cup of peppermint tea in front of him. “Talk to me.”
He laughs humourlessly, sipping at the scalding tea and he grimaces at the burning sensation. “You sound like a therapist.”
“I studied as one,” you counter, dipping your teabag up and down in the cup. “The others… they can’t say anything. But I’m leaving the BAU soon, so I’m technically allowed to ask you this without any federal obligations.” 
“I don’t know–” he begins to deny, but stops short at the way you give him a warning look.
“You’re high right now, aren’t you? And you were on the plane.” Your tone isn’t accusatory, but he expects it from the words that leave your lips. Your gaze softens as you continue. “It’s because of him, isn’t it?”
He flinches and he knows there’s no way out of it. “I tried.”
“I know.”
“I just– I can’t and I want to and I wish that I was… that I was stronger.”
“You are strong.”
He shakes his head. “I should be able to get over this. Get over everything he did to me.”
“Spencer, you were kidnapped and drugged and then you came back to the BAU like nothing even happened.” You pause and lick your bottom lip. “No one is expecting you to get over it, especially not this quickly.”
He doesn’t respond, a strange sense of deja vu filling him at your words and he sits rigid on the couch with his hands in his lap. His eyes don’t leave your face, his gaze shifting from your eyes to the curvature of your nose and then to your lips. For a split second, he wonders how they would feel against his, or how they’d feel against his neck. His head goes heavy at the thought and he pushes them away.
You don’t seem to notice where his eyes have settled, or you’re very good at acting as if he isn’t staring at your face because you continue to speak. “Well,” you say slowly, putting the cup of tea onto the table, “it’s a good thing I’m leaving the BAU then, isn’t it?”
“I don’t know if I can do this job without you,” he confesses, shifting his eyes downcast as he stares into his tea. 
You laugh a little, and he thinks it’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard. “You act as if I’m dying or something.”
“I’m serious,” he presses, swallowing the lump in his throat. “I want to be happy for you. And I am! But at the same time I feel– I feel so selfish for wanting you to stay.”
He feels you sit beside him and he instinctively leans into your touch, burying his face into the space between your neck and shoulder.
“It’s not your fault, Spence,” you whisper, rubbing comforting circles on his back. “And I’m always going to be there for you. Promise me you’ll remember that?”
He nods deftly into your neck, breathing in the smell of your perfume. 
“Spencer.”
“Promise,” he mumbles, an arm wrapped around your waist. “I know. I promise.”
You hum in acknowledgement. “Good.”
There’s a lull in the conversation, but for once it’s no longer the uncomfortable silence you were tormented with back home. You could feel everything from his hot breath on your neck to the way his fingers squeeze your sides as if you’d disappear if he held you any looser. 
“We still need to talk about this whole issue at some point though. You know that, right?” You murmur into his hair.
“I know.”
“We don’t have to talk about it now.”
“Yeah.”
“Do you want to stay over?”
“… please.”
***
It has been two weeks since you finished up at the BAU and started work at a clinic, working as a children’s therapist. It’s been a good change of pace for you; a lot slower and much more routinely. The hours are a million times better, and you find that you’re able to get home before seven on most days. The amount of free time that’s been handed to you is something to get used to, now that it’s no longer filled with completing paperwork or getting onto a plane. 
Despite all the positives, it feels strange not seeing your former team everyday. It feels strange not being able to see Penelope’s brightly coloured outfits, or Derek’s dumb jokes. You missed Emily’s sarcasm and JJ’s stories about Henry, and you missed seeing Hotch’s rare smiles whenever he sees someone in his team succeeding. A lot of the time you find yourself craving Rossi’s famous pastas accompanied with special wine. But most of all, you miss seeing Spencer in his element every single day. 
He’s been doing better, or so he says. He’s been going to self-help groups and you’ve been sending him summaries of help books written by former addicts. It seems to have helped because he’s been acting more and more like Spencer Reid than a weird limbo version of him. He still spends a lot of time at your place, sleeping on your couch despite your constant protests. He ends up taking turns with you after you bribed him with multiple chocolate donuts. 
Although he insists that he’s been doing better, his constant night terrors say otherwise and more often than not you find him sweating and sobbing in his sleep. Today is no different.
“Spencer,” You whisper, shaking his shoulder firmly. “Spence!”
He jolts awake, sitting up so quickly he almost knocks his forehead with yours. He groans, his fingers flying to his eyes as he rubs them. Fresh tears slip past his closed eyes, spilling down his cheeks and you pull him into your arms. 
“You’re okay, I got you,” you murmur, rubbing soothing circles against his shoulder blade as he sobs. 
He keeps repeating the words “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I don’t want it” as he sobs against your shoulder, clutching your shirt in the palms of his hands. 
“Breathe in,” you guide gently, running your free hand through his hair, “breathe deep… breathe out…”
He takes in a shaky breath before exhaling through sobs but he continues to follow your guide. He wraps around you tightly, taking deep breaths in before releasing them. After a few minutes of steady breathing, he finally speaks.
“I relapsed yesterday.” 
He expects you to push him off and start screaming. He expects you to start yelling at him for not being able to control himself and for wasting all his progress. He reckons he deserves it. But you don’t do any of those things. 
“That’s okay,” you respond, squeezing his hand. “Have you talked to Meredith about it?”
Meredith Gray is a therapist you introduced Spencer to. She’s a good friend of yours and specialises in addictions as well as post traumatic stress disorder, and she even wrote her final thesis about it. Even though you work in different fields, the jobs cross over a lot when there’s speculation that a parent could be sick. After explaining the situation to her, Meredith was more than willing to take Spencer as a client.
Spencer shakes his head, the guilt creeping into his chest and lacing his words. “No… I have an appointment with her tomorrow though.”
“Okay, good,” you nod, continuing to rub soothing circles on his back. “Relapsing is normal. It’s just another step to healing.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologise.”
“But–”
“It’s normal,” you repeat firmly. “You acknowledged it, and you told me. That’s good, Spence, better than most people.”
He’s quiet, his nose brushing against the soft skin of your neck before he speaks again. “Did you know I’m scared of elevators?”
You can’t help but laugh at the change of conversation and you squeeze his hand. “No, I didn’t.”
“Morgan and I got caught in one the other day. On a case,” he muses. “On average, elevators are inspected once or twice a year, but some could go up to three years without inspection. There are approximately ten thousand elevator related injuries per year, and twenty seven deaths.” 
“Now I’m never going into an elevator again,” you respond with jest, poking his cheek. “It’s late. Take the bed, Walter.”
He huffs. “It’s your turn.”
“You need it more than me.”
“I’m not fragile.”
“I never said that you are.”
“(Y/N).”
You give him a pointed look. “Spencer.”
He stares at you for a moment, holding your gaze before he swallows and looks away. You watch the way his Adam Apple bobs in his throat and you suddenly feel faint. 
“Take the bed, Walter,” you repeat, brushing a strand of hair away from his face. “Please?”
He says your name again, and he reaches up to rest his fingers against the collar of your pyjamas. Your breath hitches and you can’t help the way your cheeks grow warm and your head starts to spin. His touch is gentle, his fingers brushing against the skin of your shoulder. You resist the urge to shudder as you relish his skin against yours.
“Stay with me,” he murmurs, pleading, and his eyes glance from your collar to your eyes. 
“You hate sharing beds,” you remind him.
His thumb grazes against your jaw and his face is so close to yours you could count his eyelashes. If you didn’t know any better, you would have thought that he was going to kiss you. But you do know better, so you avert your gaze and push the thoughts out of your mind. An indescribable look flickers on his face but it is gone as quickly as it had appeared. 
“It’s okay if it’s you,” he says earnestly, and you find yourself agreeing because how could you say ‘no’ to that?
You climb into bed, one leg outside of the covers because everything felt so warm, especially with his arm wrapped around your middle and his breath against your shoulder. The thin line between platonic and romantic love has blurred indefinitely now, and at times like these you feel as if it has disappeared entirely. Guilt creeps into your veins as you feel him bring you closer to him, his nose buried into your shoulder. Is this considered coercing? He’s in the middle of healing, working towards sobriety, and here you are taking advantage of his vulnerability. Well, technically you’re not ‘taking advantage’ of him if he seeks you out first but it still feels inherently wrong. Morally wrong, maybe. 
It takes you another thirty minutes to fall asleep, your head rushing with thoughts and questions as you do. He’s gone when you wake up in the morning.
***
“Someone is looking happy,” Derek comments with a teasing grin, slinking an arm around Spencer’s neck. 
It has been about a week since the ‘sleep in the same bed’ incident and he was promptly whisked away to a case in Nevada. He felt guilty about the whole ordeal, considering he wasn’t in his right state of mind at the time. It still made him feel like a sleazy college student who had a one night stand with some random person and then bolted (even though there was no contact of that sort that night). Despite his initial guilt, his head is spinning with the sheer peace and comfort that he experienced when he was sleeping in the same bed as someone. And that someone was you! He could barely even believe it. It all felt so right and perfect… and the way you would shuffle closer at times… it was enough to get his heart racing (he thinks that it’s terribly cliche and horribly cringe-worthy, but therapy has told him that he needs to ‘embrace’ his gross sappy feelings).
“What? No– I mean yes but–”  Spencer coughs in response to Derek’s teasing, clutching the strap of his shoulder bag. 
Derek cackles at his fumbling, grinning ear to ear. “Alright, so… is it a girl?”
“What?!” He shrieks, his voice raising by two octaves as he does. “I have no idea what you’re talking about!”
“Oh so there is a girl,” Emily joins in with a smirk.
“There is– there is no girl,” he responds briskly, his cheeks burning in embarrassment.
Derek hums in thought, a mischievous look in his eye. “Did you catch up with Lila again?”
“No!” Spencer bristles at the thought. Ever since he almost destroyed his friendship with you over her, he hasn’t even bothered to give her a call. “I haven’t seen her since her since– since her case.”
“What about that girl you picked up at a bar?” Emily offers with a sly laugh. “What’s her name again?”
“Austin,” Spencer recalls instantly, his cheeks flaring up again as soon as she says her name. “B-but I haven’t spoken to her either!”
JJ rounds the corner, all too happy to join in the fun (much to Spencer’s chagrin). “I bet it’s (Y/N),” she says with a knowing smirk. 
Spencer considers his brain to be a well oiled machine of facts and logic. It’s one of the only things he could rely on– and the only thing people seem to respect him for. As of late, his ‘well oiled machine’ hasn’t been functioning as well as he would have liked, but that doesn’t mean it’s not functioning at almost full capacity. But JJ’s comment, no matter how well functioning his brain was, rendered him speechless. 
“Looks like you hit the nail on the head, JJ,” Derek cackles, clapping Spencer’s shoulder. 
He lets out a small grunt at the contact, almost stumbling over his feet before he catches himself. “There is nothing going on between (Y/N) and I. We’re just friends.” The words taste bitter on his tongue and he resists the urge to cringe.
“Sure,” Emily says with a short laugh. “Totally believe you. How long did it take for you to realise you’re in love with her?”
JJ snickers along. “Yeah, before or after you had that make out session with Lila?”
Spencer groans at their relentless teasing, covering his face with his hands as they walk along to the bullpen. They’re definitely a lot calmer once they enter their official place of work, but it still doesn’t stop the way they poke fun at him through sly smiles and tasteful words. 
“There’s nothing going on between us,” Spencer reiterates with a frown. “She knows just how difficult this job is; she doesn’t deserve to have to deal with it again.”
“Isn’t she the one who’s supposed to decide that?” Emily asks gently, no more teasing in her tone. She’s always been good at giving advice.
He pauses at that, a frown etched upon his features. His mind rushes with memories; the constant leaving, the torture, the trauma, the drugs… his fingers run through his hair. 
“It’s not a good time right now,” he explains softly.
“When will it ever?”
He doesn’t meet her gaze.“I don’t know.”
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cyberkitty1 · 23 days
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connie x nailtech! fem reader
you were laying in your bed silently as rain tapped on your windows. serene and silent… until your phone started ringing you let it until it went silent. you sighed hugging your pillow tighter.
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until your phone started ringing again, with a frustrated sigh you picked up your phone.”hello?” you said with a scratchy voice. “why you not answering the phone?” “because im sleeping? something you should also be doing instead of waking me up at-“ you look at your screen reading 3 am “ 3 am in the morning”
he sucks his teeth “didnt mean to wake you but drop the attitude” “again its 3 am im just tired, sorry” you sigh laying down.” “mmm all good i was the one that woke you up, im sorry”
“so why did you call?” you say yawning. “well i couldn’t sleep and i thought you’d be up” you hear him sigh loudly. “ fine come over” before you could say anything else you heard your front door being unlocked.
you hang up as you hear his steps near your door. “hey ma” “hey con” you watch as he takes off his sweater and puts his keys down climbing into bed next to you. “how was your day?” you ask as he burrows into the crook of your neck, wrapping his arms around you placing his hands at the small of your back.
“boring, i missed you. so does prince, why dont you just come live with us?” you hear the pout in his hushed voice. “ connie we have discussed this before, we are still early in our relationship and we both need our own spaces. i can sleep over tomorrow night if you’d like?”
“yes please” he says in a baby voice. you laugh at him. “ how was your day ma?” you take a deep breath “ i did 5 clients and 12 sets of press ons, really busy” he peppers kisses all over your neck “proud of you” you hum in acknowledgment as you both drift off to sleep.
—————
im in love with connie 🙁
this is gonna be like a mini series thing im working on. trust guys i have stuff up my sleeve 😛🤭
prince is his dog btw
banner from: @corgimyun
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pinkie-pop · 2 months
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"I Have Something To Tell You."
Part I Part II Part III
Featuring: Gender-Neutral Reader, Yandere Genshn Impact, non religious SAGAU, Yandere Fatui Harbingers
Word count: 3.1k
Includes: Portrayal of mental illness, suicide, description of injury,
Synopsis: After killing yourself and landing in the world of Genshin Impact, you reflect on all that has gone wrong.
•~•~•~•~•~•
You don't really want to go home. Not exactly. But it's easier to say you miss your bed than to say you'd be fine with any bed, so long as it isn't the one in your wing. 
You thought people who get isekaied into new worlds were supposed to be happy. You've always been unlucky, you suppose. That's right. It's easier to say you were unlucky than to face the reality of the situation: that this was all your own fault.
You should have sucked it up. Should have gone to counseling or stayed at a hospital. Should have done something else. Should have done anything else.
You should never have killed yourself. 
•~•~•~•~•~•
It all started maybe a week ago. You've always been depressed. Never passionate about anything other than your video games, never smiling at anything other than a shiny new character or banner weapon, but it had never been this bad before. For all the talk, you had never actually wanted to die.
But then something changed. You aren't quite sure what it was that set you off. Maybe a particularly bad day at work, a side effect from an experimental medication you're on, or nothing at all. Regardless, something changed, and it changed fast. Soon, death became all you could think about. It plagued your mind both night and day until, at last, you slit your wrists in the bathtub, and when that didn't work, and you woke up again, you climbed up your local water tower and jumped off.
But it didn't matter. You woke up again. Looking different, but still undeniably you. Your face and voice had changed, but the same two scars still sit mockingly upon your wrists. You can't say you're prettier now, just different. Weren't the protagonists of transmigration stories meant to wake up in beautiful bodies, completely unlike their originals? So why was it that your hair and eyes remained the same, that only your face and body had differed? 
“Your body,” Dottore explained, “was completely destroyed during your fall. So it reconstructed itself, leaving you a little different, a little the same. That's why,” he said, tapping your wrists,”—that these are still here.” Any other scars you have had disappeared from your body, any blemishes vanished, though the two on your wrists remained. It left you looking smooth and unfinished, a pale imitation of who you once were. Like someone who had only seen you a couple of times tried to draw you from memory. Dottore told you it was because you were attached to them. That the scars shaped your soul, hence their survival. You didn't quite understand, if you're being honest, but he seemed to know what he was talking about, so you didn't bother to question it.
When you woke up again after death, the first thing you noticed was how cold it was. The chill wind was bitter against your white nightwear, the breeze penetrating through the thin fabric as easily as a needle piercing one's skin. The cold seemed to seep into you, lodging itself deep inside your bones. 
It was snowing, you realized dimly. That's odd. It hardly ever snowed anymore. The thought that you ought to have been dead by now hadn't yet occured to you, only the thought of cold and bitter winter days lingered in your mind. You thought of school being dismissed due to snow in your youth, of playing and building snowmen as a child. You recalled how the snow eventually stopped coming in winters, due to the Earth’s gradual heating. When it did come, it was a sad and pathetic thing, only a few inches total, melting as soon as it hit the ground. 
You thought long and deeply, in an odd, serene state of mind despite, or perhaps because of the polar cold. You aren't quite sure how long you stayed there, reminiscing, but it must have been quite a while, seeing as how your fingers and toes turned black, contrasting starkly against the snow.
It was Tartaglia who found you first, buried knee-deep in snow, strangely calm despite the way your fingertips are blackened by the cold. Of course, you were calm. You were supposed to be dead anyway.
“You okay there, comrade?” He asked you, waving a hand in front of your face. You blinked at him slowly but otherwise didn't respond. You were so still that he would have thought you dead if not for the soft rising and falling of your chest. Tartaglia attributed your inaction to shock—a symptom he's seen plenty of during his time as a Fatuus. Seeing as how you seemed unable (or perhaps unwilling) to move, he simply picked you up and dragged you back to the Zapolyarny Palace, where you were able to warm up and get treatment.
In normal circumstances, your arms and legs would have had to be amputated, but your circumstances were far from normal.
Dottore was the one who had saved your limbs (Your legs, having been buried in the snow for hours, were beyond saving, but your fingers and hands were able to recover). For that, you were grateful. He’s a creep, sure, but sentiments of debt made you tolerate his odd rambles about medical malpractice. Made you politely ignore the way his hands seemed to linger and stray.
After all, if he could save your limbs from certain death, he could most certainly remove them with just as much ease, too.
•~•~•~•~•~•~•
The mirror in your quarters is broken. 
You punched it when you first saw yourself reflected in its panes and refused to get a replacement, despite the many urgings of Pantalone to let him buy you one. Simply having your mirror broken was not enough to completely block out your new reflection, so you requested a can of blackout paint to be brought over to your room, where you then did a—in hindsight—rather shoddy job of enshrouding the reflective surface. It looked bad, but you didn't care. 
All you cared about was never seeing the face that you hesitate to call yours ever again. 
•~•~•~•~•~•~•
You aren't quite sure why Tartaglia brought you back to the Palace when it would have been much easier to leave you in the snow. You asked him about it once, but his response was less than satisfactory. 
“You could say I fell in love with you at first sight,” he said, ruffling your hair. Because what could be more charming than a frostbitten civilian in white nightwear that camouflages them in the snow?
You decided then and there to ignore any questions you had about the Harbingers’ growing attachment to you. You didn't need to know why they felt the way they did. Only that they did.
Only that they do.
•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•
You were given a luxurious room at the Palace, far nicer than even the best of five-star resorts you could never afford. You even had your own personal maid, a brawny woman named Lera (an aptly chosen name, considering it means strength). She had her own helpers that also attended to you, three girls named Ana, Ulyana, and Irina (Ana and Ulyana are twins belonging to two rather uncreative parents, and Irina is an only child). Ana and Ulyana seem to be around your age, Irina a few years younger, and Lera about two decades older. Having the four of them around makes you feel as if you've been transmigrated into a romance fantasy novel.
When Tartaglia brought you to the Zapolyarny Palace, it caused a small ripple of chaos in its wake. The halls were filled with whispers about the strange person who seemed to have captured the heart of the eleventh Harbinger. Even more shocking than that, however, was the second’s agreement to heal you. There were many rumors going about, talk of backroom deals that must have been done to get Dottore to agree to save your arms, but no proof of such things were ever found. Some brave souls claimed that Dottore had also fallen for you and that that was why he had agreed to help. These people were hushed by their friends rather quickly, for fear of their own lives.
Stranger still was the seventh’s involvement in your recovery. Sandrone, though you're not sure how she heard about it or why she had decided to help, had created a pair of porcelain legs for you to wear. They were pretty, like a doll’s, a pale eggshell white with elegant gold carvings etched into the skin. They were comfortable, too, so much so that you almost forgot they were prosthetic, and Lera had to remind you multiple times to take them off before heading to bed.
You wanted to thank Sandrone for your legs, but you haven't seen her since your measurements and fitting. You asked a servant to send a message to her, but you've gotten no indication that she's even received it, let alone a response. As for Dottore, you were able to send your regards through Ulyana, who had to visit his section of the Palace anyway.
Tartaglia visits you daily, and soon you begin to coincidentally meet with the other Harbingers, who always seemed to have time for entertainment in the form of you.
“Oh, are you the one that our dear Tartaglia is so smitten with?” Came the sing-songy voice of Columbina. You pause, turning around slowly. To be honest, Columbina was one of the Harbingers you'd most like to avoid. Her soft voice sent shivers down your spine that—you hope—would be attributed to the cold instead. 
You turn towards her, and, afraid your voice might crack, say nothing and simply nod instead. 
“What’s your name, little songbird?” She asks you. You give it to her in a quiet voice, and she returns it with her own. Before she can say anything more, Tartaglia comes by and wraps an arm around you, making up some excuse about the two of you having someplace you needed to be. Columbina watches the two of you leave in silence, a small, closed-eyed smile upon her face.
Later, Tartaglia warns you away from Columbina. “There's something not right with her,” he says, a rare frown dancing upon his lips. “I can't place it, but you're better off staying away. And that's not just because I'd rather keep you to myself.” He then smiles and ruffles your hair in an attempt to lighten the mood. You don't say anything, but nod when he asks you to avoid her.
Pantalone is next. He visits you directly, bringing with him two golden bracelets you have no choice but to let him place upon your wrists. They do a good job of covering up your scars, which you assume is the intention behind the gift. It's oddly thoughtful, coming from him. But you know better than to think it was free.
You aren't sure if you want to know what he expects in exchange.
You meet with La Signora next, and you're surprised to see that she's still alive. You suppose the Traveler hasn't made it to Inazuma in this world yet. That's strange, but you decide not to dwell on it.
Next is Dottore’s segments, also still alive, and all of whom seem to enjoy lingering around your quarters. You often find one or two hanging around in the hallways, always making light conversation or asking if you require anything. You know better than to write it off as a coincidence, and for a while you entertained the thought that Dottore had put them up to it, before promptly writing it off as ridiculous. 
Still, a small part of you can't help but wonder if the doctor has taken a special interest in one of his dear patients.
•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•
Two weeks into your stay at the Zapolyarny Palace, you overhear a conversation amongst the servants. You hide behind a banister and listen in.
“How long has it been now?” Says a maid, a nervous hand tangled in her hair, tugging it slightly. You’ve seen her before but have never gotten her name. She’s speaking to another maid who you recognize as Tatinana.
“Almost a month, I’d say,” responds the other, gently stopping her from ruining her braids.
“Everyone’s getting antsy. I’ve never seen Lord Tartaglia so irritable.”
“I know what you mean. He used to be such a laid-back guy. Now, you can barely even hold a conversation without him looking at you like he’s ready to tear out your eyes. Lord Scaramouche has gotten even more unbearable to be around, too. And you can tell the Player’s absence has taken a toll on everyone else as well.” Player, huh? If their absence is so heavily noticed, they must be important. It’s odd, though. You’ve never once heard about such a character existing at all, let alone their disappearance. You keep listening, hoping for clues about this mysterious person’s identity.
“Don’t you think the timing is a little odd? They showed up right before the Player stopped logging in. They’ve got the Harbingers wrapped around their finger. It’s too precise to be a coincidence. There’s something to it, I just know it.” Is she…talking about you now? So this ‘Player’ disappeared right before you showed up? They stopped ‘logging in’? Well, isn’t that wording a bit peculiar? It sure sounds like gamer lingo to you.
This Player that they mentioned…it couldn’t be you, could it?
“Enough with your conspiracies. Let’s get back to work before—” A floorboard creaks from under your foot, and the two maids freeze. You suppose there’s no use in hiding anymore, so you step out to face them.
“E-esteemed guest, w-what brings you here?”
“Ah, nothing much,” you say. “I heard voices and came to take a look. What were you two talking about?” You ask casually, stuffing your hands in your pockets.
“Nothing!” The girl with braided hair squeaks. You raise an eyebrow at her, and the other shakes her head.
The girl sighs. “We aren’t supposed to talk about them,” she says.
“Maria, I think they heard,” Tatiana says. “What do you want to know?”
“Tell me more about this ‘Player’ you mentioned.” 
“Didn’t stop you before.”
“Right, well…” She pauses, seemingly formulating her next words carefully. “It’s this…force. This being behind the Traveler. We don’t know its true nature, none of us have ever seen anything like it. It controls the Traveler and their companions like a puppet to its puppeteer.”
“They’ve lost their minds,” Maria whispers. “It’s scary. They make us clean a ghost’s room. Every day, it has to be spotless.”
“And? What’s the goal?”
“That’s the thing…none of us know. The Harbingers know something, they’re all obsessed with the Player, they’re convinced that the Player holds some kind of power they can utilize, but the Player isn’t from Teyvat, and only Lord Tartaglia has figured out how to interact with it.”
“Interact with it how?”
“By being possessed. All the Harbingers want to be controlled by the Player, they think it’ll make them stronger. But it’s more than that. They used to just want to use the Player for their own gain, but somewhere along the way things changed. They’ve been working on a way to bring them here, and when they do there’s a whole wing in the Zapolyarny Palace dedicated to them.”
“It was unbearable right after the Player first disappeared, the air was suffocating. But then Lord Tartaglia brought you back and things started to return to normal. I overheard him saying being with you reminded him of when the Player used to take control.” You nod, the cogs in your head turning furiously. That settles it, then. Without a shred of doubt, you are the Player.
“Hey, so listen…”
The Tsarista summoned you and all Harbingers to a meeting in an effort to control the chaos your revelation had caused.
•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•
You thought you were prepared to see the Tsarista for the first time, but nothing in the world could prepare you for the sheer, glacial beauty standing in front of you. Her presence was strong, commanding obedience with a simple glance. Her eyes looked at you coldly, interest evident in her face as she called the meeting to order. A beautiful crown of ice sat upon her head, her impossibly white hair elegantly framing her face as it cascaded down her back.
The meeting passed by in a blur. You remember them talking about your need to be protected, to never leave the Palace without at least two Harbingers or the Tsaritsa herself escorting you. You remember telling them about how you died, stating simply that you ‘fell from a high place’ and omitting the part where you jumped. You remember the color of the buttons each Harbinger wore on their coat. But you don’t remember the part where you agreed to stay with them. You don’t remember anyone even asking.
After the meeting, news of your true identity spread like wildfire. Some people didn’t believe it, calling you a fraud or an imposter, but those voices were quickly snuffed out the second the Harbingers started to accept your new status as the Player. Immediately, you were moved to the Player’s Wing in the Zapolyarny Palace, an easy move, considering you had no possessions. 
You don’t know why they’re trying so hard to win your favor or even if they realize that they’re failing, but either way, you know you need to get out of here. You’d try dying again if you thought that would work, but after seeing your scars, the Harbingers have already blocked all potential means of speeding up your expiration date. That only leaves one option.
The Harbingers’ visits, already a nuisance, became overbearing in no time. If it wasn’t Tartaglia dragging you to his training hall, it was Dottore giving you the nitty-gritty of his latest experiments. If it wasn’t Arlecchino shoving sweets down your throat, it was Pantalone burying you in gifts.
If it wasn’t one, it was always the other. 
You have to run away. 
But how? The Harbingers are all working together to keep you under constant lock and key.
Maybe if you were able to break the bonds they’ve formed with each other, you could recruit one of them to help you. They’re all selfish assholes. You’re sure it wouldn’t be difficult to convince one of them they’d be better off keeping you to themselves.
“I have something to tell you,” you say, brushing a strand of hair out of the Balladeer’s face. “It’s about Dottore.”
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bardic-inspo · 3 days
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Dhampir Dreams
Pairing: Spawn Astarion x F!Tav (Generic/Unnamed)
Rating: Explicit (Smut)
Key Tags: breeding kink, pregnancy kink, body worship, light dom/sub, light bondage, light praise kink, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it dacryphilia, cunnilingus, PIV, Astarion’s past trauma, smut with so many feelings but nearly no plot, character introspection
Summary:
Tav saw beauty in Astarion he couldn’t have seen himself, even if he had a reflection to gawk at. She made love with a man who never thought he could have anything near it. Made all his red dreams come true, and then said: go on, make new ones, in whatever color you like. Astarion never thought about being a father. Not before her. Or: an angsty-turned-horny character study about the pale elf and his thoughts on creating new (un)life.
A/N: This is my first stab at writing a more generic Tav. Tav in this piece is AFAB and uses she/her pronouns. Most other identifying features are left out.
Click here to read on AO3 instead
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Astarion’s never thought much about making another vampire.
In the rare moments the notion occurred to him, he shoved it to the far back shelf of his mind so as not to waste himself on an exercise in futility. What did it matter, after all, while Cazador still lorded over him?
More than anything, Astarion yearned to see Cazador’s blood spill. In his mind’s eye, he’d watch it pool across the floor, not unlike the way he'd seen so much clothing puddled at so many heels. The lake he’d make of his master would be wide enough to swallow the garments of all who’d stripped bare before Astarion. Every sweat-soaked night he found himself bound to another moldering mattress beneath someone else’s weight, rocking through the motions that left his stomach sour, he’d fill his mind with such sweet dreams as Cazador’s death.
Whether Cazador would allow Astarion to drink his blood before being relieved of it varied with the fantasy. The dream changed as often as the hands on Astarion’s hips. It mattered little to him whether Cazador’s end came with true vampirism or not. As long as he ended. 
As long as the vile river of shit that comprised Astarion’s life ended, one way or another. For better. Or for good.
Of course, he flirted with the fantasy of his own spawn, sent out like skittering spiders to dispense his will. Foul little monsters they would be. Fine tools to have in his arsenal; Astarion would only want such wretches of his own the way one might want a hammer to pound a nail. And what he wanted didn’t hold any weight while bound in Cazador’s chains.
So the idea recoiled into the dusty recesses of his mind, collecting cobwebs kitty-corner to such out of reach trophies as freedom from his servitude to Cazador and the sun itself. Both still gleamed, despite the tarnish of time and hope rusted over. Despite Astarion’s prayers, no heroes came to save him. No gods or slayers or saviors spared him from his servitude. 
Until the illithids did.
Despite everything -- the centuries of torment, the hollow where his heart should be, its silence in his ribcage, the scars on his back, the thousands of other lashes that Cazador let fade from his porcelain skin -- Astarion did the one thing Cazador could never.
He stood in the sun. And on the sands of that same beach, another miracle washed ashore. A contradiction. His counterweight to everything else he’d ever known.
Tav.
Astarion’s hands roam the supple shape of her nestled against his bare chest. Her breath crests and falls soft and rhythmic, like the gentle slap of waves against the cliffs where they first found each other. His darling is always so serene in her sleep. Astarion dips his head down, nosing her splayed hair on the pillow, drinking in the lovely scent of lavender that always lingers with his lover.
Often, he wakes before her, as he does now in the dim blue light of dusk. Not yet dark enough for him to step outside, but for the moment, there’s nowhere in the world he’d rather be. Not even in the raw, rippling light of day.
The smell of her has his eyelids heavy again, the steady patter of her heartbeat hypnotic in his head. His hands curve over the flare of her hips before slipping beneath the hem of her tunic. He stifles the satisfied hum that bubbles in the back of his throat as his palm smooths down the lithe stretch of her stomach. He resettles with his nose in the crook of her neck, eyelashes grazing the twin puncture scars that mark her as his.
He’d thought, once, that he’d ascend and have her at his side for an eternity. He was scared. Frantic. Grasping. He thought he had to grasp at something, fashion some sort of tether, to have her. Thought he had to have power, and enough of it, to keep her. Now he holds her every morning in the bed they share, until day becomes night again. It’s as effortless as blinking.
Now, the thought of turning Tav into a vampire turns his stomach.
His lips brush, tender, to the flutter of her pulse in her neck. He loves those marks he gave her. He loves the way her fingertips tap against them when she’s lost in thought. He loves the way she arches into his arms as he feeds, the way her body gives and gives to him alone. That sleepy, slap-happy smile she has when he’s lapped his last for the evening. The way her eyes roll back, and she gasps, breathless, as he kisses a trail from her neck to a nipple and sucks fervently.
He loves that he’s marked her, but that it didn’t change her. He can still curl into the heat of her skin at night. Still watch her preen in a mirror. Still stare at those gorgeous eyes and know the shade of them is hers. Her cheeks still turn the shade of sunrise when he leans in with a lustful whisper, or grazes her waist with a feather-light touch.
Absently, his fingers follow the path of an old scar on her stomach. At its end, he finds the start of softness. Astarion loves that, too. She didn’t used to be soft there, when they were just surviving. They’re not just surviving anymore.
Perhaps he’s changed her after all. It’s not so scary anymore to admit she’s turned him, too. Not to the light, or anything so nauseatingly righteous. But rather, so Astarion could see himself in it. Even if his days of standing in the sun are done.
I’ll be your mirror, she vowed, what feels like another lifetime ago. She smiled in that fond way of hers that, at the time, hurt to look at too long. He scoffed at her poetic ruminations on his hair curling near his ears. The creases when he laughs. 
Tav saw beauty in him he couldn’t have seen himself, even if he had a reflection to gawk at. She made love with a man who never thought he could have anything near it. Made all his red dreams come true, and then said: go on, make new ones, in whatever color you like.
Astarion never thought about being a father. Not before her.
He’s thought of Tav as a mother before. It flitted through his mind when Astarion watched her ease Arabella’s pounding heart with the gentleness of her own. That feeling lingered when Yenna joined their camp, and Astarion caught Tav teaching her cards. Combing the snarls from the girl’s hair. Coaching her in the basics of swordplay.
She’d be a wonderful mother. Astarion has no doubts in that regard. And he, well…
He doesn’t have an example to look back on, or one to look up to. But he has his compass. Tav’s heart beats, sure and steady, in his ear. That sound’s guided him through so much else. How could he lose his way for long, if there were two pitter-patters to listen to? 
His palm paints cool over that blooming softness in her stomach. An ache burns in his own. The sort of hunger her blood won’t sate. Would she taste even sweeter, he wonders, with her body rounded and swollen? 
Of course she would. So hard to improve something so perfect already. But she’d be radiant, if she were ripe with their child.
And after, when their babe is born, and her body is new all over again, he'd love every line, every fold, every mark that came from their coupling. He’d worship every part of her that was remade by the two of them to make the three of them. Marvel at the way the same body that first truly fed him would feed their child, too. 
He’d help her find her way back to pleasure in her own way, in her own time. Just as she did for him. His Tav gives, and gives, and he’d give her anything, everything, for the rest of his days, if a wretch like him would be so stupidly blessed to be the father of her child.
Astarion pulls a breath between his teeth, his nose flooding with her floral scent again. That would change, too. She’d carry new notes in her sweat, in her slick, in her blood, while carrying their babe. Astarion wants to taste them all, to learn what songs she can sing while he does.
Instinctually, he presses to the plump of her ass to soothe the building stiffness in his cock. He plants a muted hum in the fabric of the pillow. His groin throbs to the thump-thump of his compass, beating oblivious beneath her ribs.
He pictures pouring into her, night after night, his spend spilling in little translucent rivers down her slicked thighs, overflowing from her cunt. Too much for her to hold in, but she’d take him as long as it takes until life sparks inside of her. Tav’s determined in all her undertakings. Resilient. 
And in his dreams, she’s pliant. Pleading. 
“Star, please.”
She’s trembling in that slinky, translucent nightgown she wears to bed sometimes. The one that hardly hides her skin, but cloaks it in a delectable, silvery sheen. He likes it too much to ruin it. Or at least, he has every other night. 
Oh, he’d like to ruin it, now.
Tav’s pupils are blown black with want. Sweat shimmers on her skin, spurring his tongue to swipe his own lips. Her shoulder peeks bare from her nightgown, and Astarion can see her pebbled nipples, dark beneath the sheer silk that separates them. Hardened with hardly a touch. A feeling he’s intimately familiar with. His cock twitches as he strokes the back of his hand over the soft swell of her breast. 
“Aren’t you sore, sweet thing?” He tries for tender, but it comes out coarse. Rough like the way he wants to grip her hips.
“So be gentle,” she says with a sultry smile, lips peeled apart and glistening just enough that Astarion can’t peel his eyes away. “I know you’ll take good care of me.”
Astarion slinks forward, crowding her against the edge of the bed. Careful, like cradling glass, his palm reaches out to cup the side of her cheek. She sighs into the touch, the curve of her smile reaching the heel of his hand.
“Always,” he says reverently, before his voice sinks to a growl. “You’re always so, so eager…for me.”
Her lashes flutter low over hungry eyes. All it takes is one little wordless bob of her head for Astarion’s own hunger to have the best of him. With a lazy roll of his wrists, he shoves her back with kind but firm force. The mattress bends with her impact, her breathless laughter nearly lost beneath the whine of the wooden frame. Astarion crawls after her, hands fisting in her nightgown, and pulling her free of it.
And then, she’s bare beneath him. Writhing from his tongue and teeth. Gasping out the best words he’s ever heard. Astarion downs them like a man starved, kissing her with the kind of fervor he thought reserved for bloodlust. But her lips, the promises they pour, are sustenance all on their own.
“I’m yours,” she whispers, “all yours. Always. All of me.”
Astarion can’t stifle the whine that drags from some hollow in his chest he never knew about before.
The bed creaks as he hitches one of Tav’s limber legs up over his shoulder and nips a path of sharp kisses from her ankle to the crux of her thigh. He pauses, sweeping a feverish gaze over the spread of her: legs parted in his grip, that perfect slit, already wet with want, the rest of her sprawled naked across the bed, at his mercy, at his desire, at her own. 
He leans down, tongue dipping leisurely through her cunt. Always, she swore. So there’s no hurry in how he takes apart the woman he loves so dearly, in one of her favorite ways to be unmade. No matter how many times she claws the sheets and hisses, “Please, Star. F-fuck, I need you inside of me.”
It turns something in the depths of him to hear his own name said as a prayer. It makes him want with a force and harshness stronger than any thirst he’s felt for blood. He wants to turn her. Change her. Forever, for good. For the life they could make from their bodies, bound as close as souls could be. He wants to see her swell with the love they make, with all the love he’ll leave inside her.
She’s so close, her legs quaking violently when her hand tangles his hair and yanks his head upright. She’s beautiful, flushed ruby red, taking her air in shallow doses. Her eyes burn with equal measures adoration and reproach.
Astarion smirks, unrepentant, lips smeared with devotion. “My love, any work of art takes time. And that’s what we’re making, you know. When others look upon our progeny, they will weep in the sight of such beauty.”
“If all it takes is time, dearest,” she says, with a smile just as filthy, “then I don’t want to waste one second of it lying here empty.”
“Mmm,” Astarion sighs, nosing down against her throbbing clit, eyes flashing back to hers as he dares another lick. Her fist tightens in his hair. Astarion only chuckles. 
“You’re right, of course,” he croons. “That won’t do, at all. I do recall promising to-- how did you put it the other night? ‘Fuck you full and senseless’? I’m more partial to what you begged me for a tenday ago, when I had you face-down and waiting for me as soon as the sun was set. Remind me again, my love, what you said when you weren't gasping my name?"
Astarion presses the tip of his tongue to her clit again and tastes her rapid, ravenous pulse in the heat of it. Tav’s hips jerk in response, but he holds her fast.
“I-I said I want-- that I want--”
“You want me to ‘breed you like a damn animal’," he finishes for her. "Oh, don’t be shy now, my sweet. We’re far past that. And we want the same things, after all. But," he sighs, letting his lips drag through her flushed folds, "I've another promise to keep, first.”
Astarion flicks his wrist, muttering magic beneath his breath. Tav’s sharp little yelp of surprise shoots heat straight to his groin. His cock throbs as she settles again, arms bound above her head by his mage hand, tits bouncing from the slightest struggle against her restraints. She smirks up at him, eyes aflame with fresh desire. Escape is the farthest thing from what she wants.
“You lie back now, dear,” Astarion drawls. “You’ll take me soon enough. You’ll be so good for me, like you always are, and take everything I give you. And I’ll take very, very good care of the woman I intend to make a mother.”
Astarion watches her keenly, tracing his forefinger down through her slick. He unfurls it, circling her cunt daintily, and watching her writhe for even the faintest promise of friction. He’s not sure if it’s his mercy or his selfishness that readily discards the thought of keeping her here, just like this, for the rest of the day. She’s mesmerizing, with the way her back arches from the blankets, and how her body strains towards any touch he’ll spare her. 
All mine, he thinks, with a smile that makes him feel weightless. He grounds his hardened cock against the edge of the bed, groaning. All yours, darling. Just for you.
Pride rumbles low in his chest as he sets his mouth back to work again and knows she can’t cover her own. There’s no muffling his name pouring from her lips. No hiding how she cries for him. Her whole body winds taut, shuddering with every stroke of his tongue. 
Finally, finally, he lets his finger slip inside her. Astarion sighs into a satisfied purr, letting the tremble of it soak into her sex. Her cunt’s a vice around his knuckle. Every pump of his finger feeds the building burn inside him, fanning the ache to be sheathed in that tightness. He only aches more, feeling her squeeze around his finger, and knowing she longs for him just the same.
He slips in a second finger to join the first, feeling her spread and then clench anew. Astarion ruts aimlessly into the mattress, in time with the thrust of his wrist. The head of his cock weeps anticipation with the rogue tear trailing down the side of her cheek. It’s only pleasure that makes her cry.
There’s only love in her heavy-lidded gaze as she pants, “Please.”
Mercy, then, Astarion resolves. For both of them.
Her thighs quiver against his ears like leaves in a breeze. Astarion swirls his tongue against the bud of her clit and sucks tightly. Tav stiffens abruptly. His arms hook firm around her legs as a shattered sound breaks from her throat,and a hard tremor courses through her hips. 
He holds her through it, pinning her to the bed until just the faintest brush of his lips has her shuddering. The start of her plaintive whimper has him easing back. A murmured word sets her wrists free of her restraints. Her heart still hammers, sumptuous, in his head, as he peppers her legs in kisses soft as velvet.
“Beautiful,” he whispers with each one, slinking up her body while she comes back down. “So, so beautiful.”
He thinks of new life, as his knee bends between her thighs and drags her open all over again. He thinks of the graveyard, where he had her freely beneath the stars, in the dirt where he woke centuries ago. He thinks he’d be happy to die again, this way, as he slides forward and buries himself inside her waiting heat.
Astarion grates out a long, low moan as he basks in the wrap of her arms and her cunt. Dimly, he feels her fingertips threading gently through his curls. He thinks of sunlight on his skin again as he sinks in fully, bracing his arms on either side of her head, letting his forehead tilt against hers. He can feel her pulse thrumming through her body, through his cock, through his fogged-over thoughts. His hips roll to the sound, as if it beckoned him to motion. Tav’s head drops back into the pillows. She lets out a long, contented hum, while her body rocks in time with his.
“Is this what you needed, darling?” He huffs a laugh, catching her lips in chaste kiss. It’s enough for her to taste her own sweetness. And one squeeze from her cunt is enough to cut his breath away all over again. 
“I think you needed me, too,” she purrs.
“Y-yes,” he stammers through bared teeth, his throat tied taut as she wrings him for all he’s worth. “Yes.”
She knows exactly what he needs, what he yearns for. He needs her, needs this, needs to see his seed seeping from her fucked-out hole, pink and puffy and leaking. He’ll know the rest of it was spent so deep inside her, her fertile womb is flooded. That’s his, too, with the rest of her. 
Hips high for me, beautiful, he’ll say, when his last thrust is done. And he’ll hold her legs up against his shoulders, kiss her heels, and slip the pillow beneath her pelvis. Just to be sure it takes. 
It’ll be another couple months before they’ll start to see the fruit of their efforts. Until Tav starts to bloom with it. And then, he’ll be hard pressed not to have his hands on her every hour. Cupping the fresh heft of her breasts as they grow with the passing days, heavy from him, for the babe growing in her belly. He’ll soothe her weepy eyes and tits alike, with a skilled tongue and sweet whisper. Rub her shoulders to ease the new weight her bones carry. Draw his nose down her neck and smell not just her, but himself, and the consequences of what they did, right here in this bed.
Feel her change beneath his hands and feel so fucking proud to be the reason.
Pleasure winds, binding, around his cock, and he feels that hunger snap its jaws around him all over again. His hips snap with it, jerking frantically. I need you, all of you, he thinks, and if he weren’t already fucking her, he’d be on his knees, begging for all he’s worth. Her cunt quivers, and he’s lost to the grip of her. Astarion shoves his own knuckles in his mouth to stifle a strangled cry. 
“Star?”
Astarion rips awake in a sweat. He sees familiar wooden beams above his head, above his bed. Sunlight streaks the floorboards, leaking from behind the curtains. Turning his cheek, he finds his lover peering at him from over her shoulder, concern wrinkling her face. Tav still lays on her side, and Astarion still presses against her back. But his hand clamps tight to her thigh, bare where he hiked up her tunic. And his cock twitches fitfully against her ass, unspent and painfully hard. 
Just a dream, then. For now, at least. 
He lets out a long, weary sigh, slumping back into the sheets. Tav tilts her head, the worry in her gaze gradually dissolving into a mischievous gleam.
“I thought you might--” she starts, snickering, “but you were having sweet dreams, weren’t you?”
“The best I’ve ever had,” Astarion mutters mournfully as he buries his face in his pillow. “You were there, of course.” 
Astarion rarely sleeps anymore. It’s not normal, not natural for an elf. But it was a trick he taught to dodge Cazador’s torment at least for a few hours a day. Reverie used to mean putting the horrors on repeat. He’d slowly eased from the habit, now that he has new memories worth seeing a second, third, or hundredth time. 
Still, occasionally, he drifts to sleep without meaning to. Sometimes, he wanders off into novel nightmares. Or, if he’s lucky, he dreams of making love to his wife and making her pregnant. Of making their own little dhampir.
His hips shift, and he hisses. Pre-cum seeps from the head of his cock, slickening the shaft. It’s not enough. Not after such a succulent fantasy. But one touch from his darling might have him sated, if not entirely satisfied. Pleasure stabs, sharp, through his groin as she shifts and brushes him with her motion. He grimaces. 
Just one touch alone could do it.
“I’m here now,” she smirks, twisting to face him. Her hand slips down between them. Mercy, he thinks, as her fingers wrap his length. He thrusts into her palm with a pleading whimper. “Tell me all about these dreams of yours.”
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A/N: If you're yelling "Let him breed!!" at the screen just know I'm right there with you holding a megaphone about it 💜
If there's interest (from others & myself) perhaps there might be a part two where Tav takes matters into her own hands. Makes him say exactly what he wants, if he wants to have it so bad 👀
If you'd like me to add you to a tag list for future one-shots, or all of my future BG3 fic (including multi-chapters), leave me a comment and let me know which you'd like!
& HUGE thank you to some lovely Discord and Tumblr friends/moots who cheered me on as I worked on this one! 💜
Tag List: @wilteddreamsofbaldursgate
Banner credit to @cafekitsune
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358 notes · View notes
reverie-starlight · 3 months
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megumi loves…
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a collection of things megumi loves about you.
gn!reader, no physical descriptions. so sweet it’ll make your teeth rot tbh. he won the poll so here’s the fic as promised!! literally wrote this on the bus and train rides this morning after having this planned for weeks. I literally love him sm he is everything to me <3
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megumi loves when you play with his hair. the feel of your nails running along his scalp, playing with the nape of his neck- it’s calming. you do it most often when you’re both in his bed, cuddling after a mission or a long day of training. he’ll flop down on top of you, plant his head on your chest and sigh. he waits for you to do something, drawing the sweetest sound he’s ever heard from your lips (a laugh) as he glares up at you when you don’t move your hands. you’ll mumble out a soft “aw I’m sorry, baby,” before giving him exactly what he wants. he’ll press tender kisses to any patch of skin he can reach in thanks. you’d never make him ask twice because you know he truly appreciates this time spent with you and you’d never want him to shy away from you. you’re each other’s safe space after all, who would you be to deny him?
sometimes you’ll do it in public, too, but far less often. these are the times that you just can’t hold back- he’s so cute, why would you? he grumbles about it a bit, especially if you’re around people you know (he’s shy, after all), but can he really complain when you look at him so softly as you play with his dark locks? he’ll endure the teasing and reassure you that he’s fine with it if you start to pull away.
megumi loves running his fingers along your facial features. over the bridge of your nose, the apples of your cheeks, tracing your lips… he just loves your facial structure. it sounds like an odd compliment to give someone, especially if it’s the first compliment you give someone (and in his case, it was the first compliment he managed to stutter out after you offhandedly called him pretty when you were in the transition stage from friends to lovers), but he’s thankful that you seem to find it sweet.
he loves your face when you’re awake, so full of life and excitement that he can’t help but match when you’re both alone in the comfort of each other. the pretty smiles you’ll give him make his heart pump just a bit faster, the lovesick in your eyes after he kisses you… he wouldn’t trade it for the world. he’d do anything to keep you happy.
he loves your face when you’re asleep, too. especially after you’ve had a rough day. you look so serene and peaceful. even if you do drool or think you’re less than flattering, he always thinks you’re the most stunning thing ever. he loves when you scrunch your nose in your sleep, and he always places a hand on your cheek to smooth it out. he adores the look on your face as you slowly wake up and blink at him before cuddling into him further and sighing as you fall back asleep.
megumi loves when you get a bit clingy. everyone is a bit surprised when they see how all over each other the two of you can be (at least, as much as he is willing to show in public- which isn’t much, but for everyone else it’s huge) he loves it when you can’t help but wrap your arms around him because you missed him (you probably saw him less than an hour ago).
he adores the way you refuse to let him get out of bed on weekends, insisting that you need your fix of “never-ending affection” from him before can start his day. and he loves giving it to you. he’ll start with peppering quick kisses all over your face, smiling against your skin when you giggle and wrap your arms around his neck, not at all tempted to squirm away, but rather to pull him in for more.
he’ll be convinced to lay with you for a bit longer, of course, and do it without complaining. because at the end of the day, he loves to feel needed by you. he likes having you close to him more than he hates getting teased by his friends and gojo for being all soft.
believe it or not, he enjoys it when you initiate play fights with him. neither of you go all out- you do that enough on missions- so it’s just the two of you rolling around in bed, laughing and pinning the other down. he’ll pick you up and throw you back down, he’ll summon his demon dog to jump all over you so he can have the upper hand, just to keep you smiling. he knows physical affection is important to you, so why would he deny you of that? he never wants to make you feel like you’re not getting what you need from him.
megumi loves when you tease him. this surprises even him to this day, because he doesn’t like the feeling of getting worked up at all. but his working theory is that he enjoys the intimacy of it. you don’t tease him about every little thing, you know he doesn’t like that, but you do tease him about things hyper-specific to your relationship. for example: that one time he messed up the pronunciation of that word in an argument? you never let him live it down, but you’ll also never disclose the inside joke to anyone else. you might be a nuisance on purpose, but you’re also his number one defender when it comes to anyone else teasing him.
you also like to fluster him. poking him all over when you want attention, blowing air into his face when he leans in to kiss you… it’s all so fun for you. you’ll get close enough to his face to make him blush, you’ll tease that spot on the back of his neck that he’s never told anyone but you about, and he hates how easily you get to him, but he’ll tolerate it because he knows you’re just as easy to fluster as he is.
he loves to tease you back. as soon as you’re back in your room after a full day of not letting up on him, he’s got his arms wrapped around you, and he’s walking you backwards until your laying on the bed, staring up at him wearily… and then you’re screaming because his skilled hands are all over your sides, your ribs and your hips. and once you’re spent, he’ll lean in close to your ear and whisper his own teasing remarks (normally compliments he knows you’d have trouble accepting otherwise) to get you whining and mumbling out laughter-filled apologies he won’t be accepting any time soon.
yeah, megumi just loves you.
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hope you enjoyed!!! it’s a different format from my other fics so lmk if you’d want this with any other characters!!
998 notes · View notes
throwaway-yandere · 5 months
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𝗖𝗹𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹 𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗱𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 [Yandere!Dottore/Reader]
a/n: this fic is 100% dedicated to @leftdestiny-posts and they would know just how much they had inspired me in this fic once they finished reading it HAHAHAHAH. P.S.: the classical songs mentioned are actual songs. Yes, the title is half a joke. Here's the spotify playlist if you're curious.
Unreliable Synopsis: You cannot remember your past, but your doctor has been with you every step of the way— and he's more than willing to spend some time with you outside the hospital. Still... did you always have pure white hair?
CW: yandere themes, light body horror, manipulation, its dottore, c'mon LOL.
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Concert II "Tristezza Di Fine Anno", performed by the Morespoke Philharmonic with their conductor, Lady Columbina, began nearly an hour ago. And you had the fortune of hearing their songs for yourself.
The well-dressed crowd filled the seats, behaving in what was appropriate for their high station. It was fully booked. The music overwhelmingly masked anyone's breaths, if they had one to start with. Her program can be felt deep in the audience's bones. Rattling them in each sforzando before it lulls down through the sound of her handpicked musicians— with Lady Columbina as the lonesome soloist when the moment calls for it.
"This piece, Symphony No. 5 in C-Sharp Minor, is not Columbina's own making, she had failed to mention that," your company hummed. "This was by another composer who hid behind the name Safed. They were a self-fulling prophecy. Do you wish to know what they said about this piece?"
You said nothing as Zandik— Lord Dottore— stroked your unnaturally "white" hair.
"They said that nobody understood the piece and that they wish they could conduct the first performance five centuries after their death."
Zandik smiled.
"What say you? Do you think those words are true?"
Your company was a tall and thin man with artificially pale-ish skin and wavy blue hair. His eyes were reportedly bloodshot crimson, although you had not received proof of that in this lifetime. But, you were drawn to his deep ocean-like colors, and that was enough to keep you mildly complacent to his strange remarks.
Zandik is surprisingly a considerate man, but he must've brought you with him for a reason. He told you himself that the reason he brought you out of your prison-like hospital room was a mere experiment on his behalf. Paradigm-shifting consequences of his strange social experiments with you are likely to occur, and he cares not for its ethical debates. He won't ask for rhetorics; these to him are tangible outcomes and no questions will be entertained.
All except his.
"I think… "
The composition had a serene, slightly asymmetrical feel to it. You were certain this was Lady Columbina's creative liberties at play. Something about it did not capture its true authenticities. The show purported to narrate three stories: the first concerned a judge who had to find a loved one guilty; the second concerned a prince who drove their beloved into despair; and the final was a tale of a knight who disregarded his obligation to defend a loved one.
But it felt incomplete. As if there was a missing piece— a secret fourth act hiding between the notes and stage.
"A person can't completely mourn for something they would never experience," you told him. "But even so, if I were Safed, I'd feel like my effort would've been a waste."
His eyes remained trained on your hair as you spoke. Zandik seems to dislike it. Unlike his cells mixed with engineered nanomaterials, yours are uniquely… "natural". His hair has a color intensity, whereas yours was the presence of every color— as physics explained it.
"Something they would never experience…" Zandik repeated, tasting the words on his tongue— a smirk etched on his face as though it tasted like bitter irony.
You continued.
"I have a hunch that Safed put everything they worked hard on all their pieces because Lady Columbina wouldn't have performed it otherwise. Since all the songs on the concert's program are marketed as underappreciated compositions, I would… um… infer that they also questioned their works and ultimately themselves if it all had worth in the end. Hopeless for the lack of attention, they probably thought there's more hope if they lived in another generation."
You wanted to say, though you're not sure where this negativity came from, that they probably despised how their well-crafted works were ignored and their sloppy yet significantly more popular compositions angered them.
But you're not Safed. You don't want to put words in their mouth.
".... Hmm, an acceptable hypothesis— a decent one, even," whatever monotonous response Zandik wished to convey, his voice betrayed his grand satisfaction. "Yet I won't give you any confirmation."
"I know."
Zandik laughed.
"The next piece is Norn's Adagio for Strings Op. 11, before the closing Symphony No. 6, better known as Pathétique Symphony, in B Minor Op. 74."
You tilted your head innocently. "Pathetic?"
"Another piece by Safed. It's a Fontaine-translated title. It's originally named pateticheskaya, which meant passionate or emotional, not at all pitiable."
He crossed his arms, insulted as though he was the one who came up with the original title.
"Roughly half a millennium past, the masses attributed Safed's demise to the strains of their final composition, the so-called Pathétique, a mere nine days preceding their exit from this mortal coil. The prevailing narrative spouts a tale of a tragic surrender to the clutches of undiagnosed clinical depression. I find such simplicity in analysis rather pedestrian, wouldn't you agree?"
You took a while to process his inquiry before hesitantly nodding.
"I… I think so."
Zandik smiled.
It's hard to tell if it's genuine, especially when such a protruding mask hides his eyes. Should its existence vanish, you aren't certain you'd see a soul within his pupils either.
"Safed hated this piece, believing it should be cast aside and forgotten. They were living in the woodlands when they wrote it— and when they decided to live with their benefactor, it was suddenly difficult to tear them away from their work."
You nodded to cue that you were still listening.
"They have an incredibly deep connection with their works. One might say they see in tunes rather than color."
You nodded again.
"Your inclination towards a perpetual affirmation of propositions, presumably to veil any potential lacunae in your cognitive purview, does not escape me. It is, if I may be so bold, your agreement that conceals your specter of unfamiliarity, right?"
You rarely understand a word he says when he is in this passionate state. You just nod as if you knew.
"Adorable," Zandik chuckled.
His voice was chillingly low yet… comforting. 
"Your sincerity constitutes an enchanting facet of your comportment."
He had to be teasing you.
"Although…" Zandik grabbed a few locks of your hair as though it was slimy and unpleasant— quickly retracting them with a disapproving tilt. "You could stand to utilize more (h/c) hair dyes. How is it conceivable that it has returned to white yet again?"
You opened your mouth but Zandik raised a finger.
"No. I am the scholar here. Do not answer."
You giggled. "Understood, Doctor."
He grinned, inadvertently showing off his pointed canines.
"What a good test subject you are, my dear (Y/n)."
Whether good was a subjective or objective assessment or not was up to interpretation.
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The mid-concert intermission began, allowing Lady Columbina's pressured musicians a 20-minute sigh of relief. Zandik ushered you to the back where the Lady Harbinger reposed on a white sofa, her cheek brushing a visibly soft and cloud-like pillow. The bright backstage lighting made her seem ethereal.
She looked like heaven, but Zandik would argue that "(Y/n)" is the true epitome of the word.
"Greetings. As expected, you'd initiate conversation at the earliest convenience." She cooed. "You look younger today, Doctor."
"You know very well that I do not take that as a compliment, Columbina." Zandik scoffed. "How many times will we rehearse this canned script until it is a learned lesson?"
"Perhaps it shall end on the day you refrain yourself from recreating… perspectives."
"Since my encounter with the Dendro Archon, I have not revisited that notion."
Columbina's gentle smile dropped coldly. "You know that your segments are not what I am referring to."
You looked back and forth between the two. Each of them was a distinctively unique person and it's a challenge to take your eyes away from the other.
Hence, when you felt Lady Columbina's eyes on you, you shook and straightened yourself before bowing stiffly.
"G-Greetings, Lady Columbina!!!"
Her gentle smile resurfaced.
"Greetings to you as well, dear Safed."
You blinked.
Dottore clicked his tongue, and Columbina laughed softly.
"Apologies, I meant to say (Y/n)— that is the name you go by in this era of humanity, right?"
You'd rightfully claim that between the three of you, you were the most human. Zandik has his clones, Columbina's origins are of strict secrecy, and you are a mere amnesiac patient. But the way she addressed you was sounding awful like stripping you away with that sense of humane identity.
"Yes? I guess?"
Columbina delightedly buzzed in your reply. "(Y/n)— truly a lovely name. That must mean that you're very healthy! It warms my heart to hear that name again. The other ones had terribly dull names, but if the Doctor had given you this title, then it must mean his research is finally drawing to a close."
Her remarks made little sense. You know little about yourself and trust only the Doctor's judgment. Should you trust her words, then it must mean (Y/n) isn't your real name…
But… that doesn't seem right either. 
"Not quite, the name deserves no celebration," Dottore replied happily. "I merely ran out of translations. Bianco, Wit, Bái— what else is there? Ancient Natlan?"
"Scientists truly make for terrible poets— Why not try Inazuman?" Columbina offered.
Those words must have had a heavy weight to them because Zandik pondered for much longer than expected.
"Hmm. I'll keep that in mind," Zandik muttered. "Although it is preferable it does not have to reach that point."
"May I ask why did you bring them here?" Columbina asked.
"It's a bit of an unconventional experiment, but I've been exploring how to elicit positive associations with certain stimuli. Exposing them to music as I accompany them should cause them to associate the emotional response it elicits with being around me." Dottore hummed. "It would be asinine to put them in a chaotic yet controlled environment such as a theme park. While a racing heart may be effective, I shouldn't risk a (Y/n)'s well-being by subjecting them to roller coasters."
"Are you sure you're not the scared one?" You asked cheekily. Zandik rolled his eyes.
She shook her head.
"What a roundabout way of saying you're taking them out on a concert date…"
Columbina looked at you once more.
"Oh, but (Y/n), you appear unwell, my dear…" she pointed at stage left. "Why don't you fix yourself up in the nearest restroom?"
Dottore raised an eyebrow, which made you want to decline Columbina.
"I'm r-really okay, Lady Colum—"
"I insist."
Columbina smiled wider. Her laced mask cast a gloomy shade on her visage.
You had no other choice.
"O… Okay."
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The halls that led to the restroom were mostly empty. Perhaps it was due to Lady Columbina's performance that made them patiently await the next song.
But there was one young man you encountered along the way. He had blonde half-way braided hair and purple-ish eyes. You paid him no mind as he circled a small rectangular paper, likely the concert's ticket, between his fingers. However, within a second, that paper vanished.
You stopped in your tracks and looked at him curiously, wondering if your eyes played tricks. He laughed, noting your attention.
"Ah! Sorry," he cheerfully gestured a small wave. "Didn't mean to practice in public."
The blonde man approached you with a smile.
"You're #9805, right?"
Immediately, you both got on the wrong foot.
Your nose scrunched, "I prefer (Y/n)."
The man flinched. "Oh, yikes! I'm not making the best first impression— nice to meet you (Y/n)! I have something for you."
You thought he was handing you his concert ticket for a moment but when you took a good look, it was a grayscale brochure.
And a white tulip…
"Um…"
"Needless to say, I'm something of a—"
"Trickster?"
"Magician, but an astute guess nonetheless!" He laughed sheepishly. "I was waiting for you, I thought you wouldn't go to the restroom."
So, did Lady Columbina plan this?
You caressed the binding and skimmed through the pages. "What's this for?"
"Father said you might be interested in its contents," the young man said. "That's all."
You blinked.
"... Are you saying you missed out most of the concert just to hand me this?"
He laughed awkwardly again. "My dear sister says I have a habit of missing a hint of romanticism when it counts, so I guess today's just one of those moments."
"Did you not like the music?" You scoffed, temper rising.
"Did you hate the composition? Did you not understand the e-emotion behind the chords? Don't you understand just how d-disrespectful that was?!"
"Woah, woah, I didn't say any of that." His eyes widened.
He didn't expect your voice to crack.
"I'm so sorry if you're offended— are you one of the original composers?"
You took a deep breath.
… Why were you mad?
… Why did it feel like those songs mean more to you than meets the eye?
"Sorry, I just…" You shook your head. "I guess I'm not feeling well. Oh, no, I'm so SO sorry…"
An unknown part of you thrived to hear him praise the music. That same part pitied the composer who worked day and night to perfect their piece. It's an ugly voice, but it was sincere.
… What was wrong with you? Why did you suddenly lash out? What was going on?
"Oh, well there's no need to be sorry then." The blonde man took his hat off and bowed.
"Farewell, Mx. (Y/n)!" He grinned. "The greatest magician in all Teyvat will take his leave. Thank you for your time!"
With the sway of his dark cape, he disappeared.
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You entered the restroom to wash your face. It didn't do much to soothe your nerves. The lingering dread for your strange emotional mood swing remained.
To distract yourself, you read through the article.
The Enigmatic Legacy of Composer Safed
In the annals of musical history, few figures emerge as enigmatic and hauntingly captivating as the orchestral composer, Safed. Born five centuries ago amidst the ancient woodlands of Sumeru, this ethereal musician seemingly materialized from Vanarama with no familial relations.
Huh… So it's about the one who wrote the previous compositions earlier.
No wonder that blonde man asked if you were one of the composers. He was being a smartass.
A Fiery Finale: The Pathétique Symphony
Legend has it that in their final act of emotional expression, Safed penned the "Pathétique Symphony," a composition so emotionally charged that, overwhelmed with disdain for their creation, they purportedly set ablaze their woodland home. Seeking solace and escape, Safed accepted the benevolent offer of a city-dwelling benefactor.
Safed… burned down their house?
No…
No, that's not how you remembered that.
No.
No. No. No. No. No.
That's not what happened. "Safed" didn't burn their house down.
Suddenly, you stilled. Your thoughts ran wild, but your inner rationale tried to force them to a halt. This peak in anxiety did not make sense.
… Why would an amnesiac like you know what happened?
A Swansong: Il Dottore's Beneficence
Their benefactor, now celebrated as our Lord Harbinger, Il Dottore, welcomed Safed into the city's heart. It was here that the truth unfolded: Safed had been grappling with hearing loss for years, an affliction that fueled their artistic brilliance yet cloaked them in a muffled world. They were unaware of their disability, yet thrived in their field.
Wait…
Before you began to read the final paragraph in Safed's brochure, you hurriedly went back to Dottore and the composer's vintage photographed portraits.
After seeing their face, you dropped the brochure in the restroom's sink.
You saw their face.
You saw YOUR face and Zandik's.
But not quite. That was you, but at the same time, it wasn't. Zandik looked stiff in those photos with "you", likely a product of the time since Kamera photography was used only in rare formalities that required a bit of dress up. But the "you" you saw was sickly way beyond the formal costumes. They had (e/c) eyes and (h/c) hair, but yours were all white. 
White…
Safed… That's the Sumeru translation for white, isn't it?
Bianco, Wit, Bái— they're all translations for "white", aren't they? And if Dottore and Columbina's earlier conversations were to go by, the one after you would be named Shiro.
The one… after you?
"Tut tut."
You trembled at the familiar sound.
You slowly turned your head around and there he was, leaning against the restroom door.
"You were in the restroom for too long. It appears my suspicions were not unfounded."
Without waiting for a response, he approached with large strides. His gloved hands seized your stressed shoulders. The grip tightened harshly as he forced you to meet his intense gaze. Blood trailed from the corner of your mouth, and your anxiety heightened. He angrily bared his sharp teeth as he watched it stain his gloves.
And yet Zandik looks…
Sad.
And distressed.
He pressed his earpiece.
"Test Subject #9805 exhibits troubling symptoms. Hematemesis suggests a severe physiological response. Persistent manifestations of albinism in ocular and follicular pigmentation indicate underlying deformities. Immediate isolation is warranted for the researcher and subject's well-being."
His hand was cold. Skin imbued with silver nanomaterials after several operations, reminiscent of the age-old philosophical question: "Is it still the same ship if you gradually replace all of its parts?" 
Then Zandik did something unexpected.
He dropped his hold and you prepared yourself by shutting your eyes as he swung his arm.
To hug you.
"I'm sorry, I have failed you again, (Y/n)," Zandik muttered. "I should not have raised my expectations."
"W… What? Why are you putting me in isolation?" You asked, rattled. "What have I done?! I just— I didn't do anything wrong! What did I—"
He shifted, dragging your arm to hug him back as though you were a little girl's doll. Zandik rested his head on your shoulder, shaking slightly.
"In your innocence, no fault lies. I thought I had accomplished what I had set out to do, and met unfulfilled expectations" Zandik gritted his teeth, voice somber. "Despite centuries of refinement, it appears that I still have room for improvement in perfecting the process… I was right. This deserves no celebration."
The doctor laughed sadly.
"When will I ever be proven wrong?" He asked himself as he wiped the blood off the corner of your lips.
He pulled away, pecking your forehead.
"I'm sorry."
Those were not the words you expected from his mouth, and yet you heard it more than once. I'm sorry. It does not fit his character, nor does the tender yet cold hug he had given prior.
You're scared. You're terrified. You know what was bound to come. You know what awaits you. White walls. Silence. Separation.
Solitary.
Far from a choice. Far from negotiable.
There's no amnesty.
And yet, the words flowed from you naturally.
"... I forgive you."
You have no idea why you said what you said. There's no certainty that you believed your own words. Zandik's lip twitched downward.
"You should not," Zandik croaked. "Why? Why must you always forgive and accept my selfishness? Do you derive satisfaction in seeing me in this state?!"
You opened your mouth to answer but were stopped abruptly as he grabbed your hair.
Zandik had always favored you compared to other patients. You know this very well. He's an evil man and the list of actions he had done that had harmed you in the name of science is at least two pages long upon your awakening. Yet, you were sure he liked you enough for he told you of his new exciting experiments. He scolded you when you left his research institute for fresh air. And he would hold your hand whenever you dreaded those thick injections.
You just didn't know he had it in him to fold from his intimidating facade just to kiss you like a desperate man. 
Breathless under his control, he softly pressed his lips against yours. His lips were chapped and cold, and he took you in gently as though he'd break you. Zandik, as strange as it was, still seemed to prioritize your comfort over his needs. Normally, this tension would've made him so short-tempered. But this will be your last interaction. The doctor tasted your blood in his mouth, and he was nauseous at the thought of hurting you more. But he stopped. Even though he wishes to force all his pent-up desires onto you. Even though he wanted to love you thoroughly that you'd forget your name again.
Zandik whimpered quietly as he pulled away— sounding like a dog that would not sleep that night. What was left in between was a thin disappearing line of saliva and blood that quickly broke off.
The doctor should be happy he finally got to have a proper date with you after 9805 failed attempts. 
But he's not content.
He was about to lean in for the second time but stopped himself. Selfish. To think he nearly saw you two finally walking down the aisle. Why was he always so selfish when it came to you? But those rhetorics mattered not in your head.
You were silenced. You were held.
You were loved.
"No." Zandik breathed in, laughing humorlessly. "No— I am the scholar here. Don't answer."
And you will be disposed of.
"Take them away." He spoke to his men calmly. They had entered long enough to witness what he had done. The men did not hesitate to grab you, thinking Dottore thought you no more than a mere toy.
But calm was deceptive. It does not convey the distress that chokes him.
Maybe…
Maybe in the 9806's trial… he'll have you as he always wanted.
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The Fatuus that escorted you in was gentle. A silent guide. The expression on her face was clear that she wanted to extend her apologies as well but mustn't.
You already have a white tulip in hand.
Arlecchino already sended her regards in advance.
When she opened the door by tapping a card against the lock, she bowed her head. You let yourself enter without a fight. The room was pure white with the rest of the furniture matching the drapes. But Dottore didn't just provide the necessities. There were books, sketch pads, and other recreational materials.
As you were about to approach the center, something was off on both sides.
You looked to your left.
Two clear mirrors divided your room from the others. There's a sign on the left wall. Code #4135.
You stood, shocked, grieving at the sight of your predecessor. They were a mirror of you but with a different name— and an even worse state.
One had made a slight sound coming off their skin— rotting slightly. There's a tube connected to their mouth and you could see yourself— you could see them dripping. They had your face. Their hair and eyes were white. The nose was gone, leaving a gaping hole. Their neck was cricked back at an unnatural angle. You don't know if they're still breathing. They're still bleeding. They must've bitten off their tongue.
There's a lone white blanket that covers the rest of them.
You think they might be dead.
You think "you" might've died more than once.
THUD!
You jolted at the sound coming from the wall behind you. Upon seeing their body, you froze.
Code #032.
They were but a head. You wish you could only focus on that aspect, but you looked lower and your hair raised. They cannot feel the same, for they were almost only a spine left. The rest of them were their skeletal frame, guided by thin lines one can barely call flesh.
Their head banged against the mirror. The thought that the sound was what made you flinch earlier made you unwell.
They seem to be telling you something. Their breath fogged up the glass and their thinned white hair splayed across your view. Their mouth said something urgently you couldn't comprehend because their tongue was paper-like in size.
#032 was shaking. Their pain grew vivid in every movement that the room was starting to spin. You sensed their turmoil.
They looked like death.
You all looked like death itself, both the pretty and ugly ends of it.
"Don't." You whispered, begging as you knelt to their level. "You don't have to speak."
You laughed deprecatingly.
"We're not the scholar here. He is."
In every syllable, you saw the outline of their esophagus strain. The nerves were blueish purple. The little skin they have left on their cheeks is sunken. Their lips were gnawed, likely as a response to the pain they'd gone through previously. Fists of bone tapped against the glass, and you quivered, imagining their pain.
You were not afraid of them. You only mourned their anguish. In fact, you feel at ease to be in the presence of yourself from the past.
It reminded you of what "Safed" had allegedly spoken years ago.
Nobody understood the pieces you made and you wished you could conduct the first performance five centuries after your first death.
And now, here you are.
Seeing two "people" who do understand you.
And they share your face.
"Pathetically", the only one that can understand you is yourself.
You're all flies trapped in a web that the predator refuses to wrap and consume out of pity. Compared to the others, you looked fine.
But your lungs were blistering.
Despite their deathly ill and mutilated bodies, you were the one bound to die soon enough.
His experiments worked.
You love him.
You love Zandik.
And how tragic it was that the person who learned how to love him was doomed to perish.
In your last minutes, you recalled something vital:
As an outsider, your body was not meant for this world, but after encountering the woodland creatures and Zandik, it became tremendously difficult to part ways with it.
You coughed up yet again with a gentle smile on your face. Maybe you're not dying…
Maybe you're just returning home, for every atom in your multiple bodies was once part of the galaxy.
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You are (Y/n) (L/n).
And you were not from Teyvat.
Much like the rest of the descenders, you have a quirk about you that sets you apart from the norm. For the travelers the world reveres today, it was their distinct determination and questionable age that was remarkable. Yours slightly titters to an inhuman level.
You can "clone" yourself.
Zandik and the "original" you wouldn't phrase it in that manner, but it's the easiest way to describe your talents.
"So, it is cloning." Zandik paused. "Mind letting me in on the science behind the process?"
He was an ordinary student when you both met. Far from a doctor, but at least he was a registered scholar in the Akademiya. Zandik didn't have an eloquent tongue as he does in the present, yet his curiosity burned all the same.
Which is why, back then, you thought his questions were cute.
Not dangerous.
"It's not that I can make copies of myself without consequences," you humored with a grin. "I'm just making… fragments of myself. Segments, if you prefer to call it that. It's a common ability for the people back in my world. None of us do it excessively— especially since we're kind of an invasive species." 
Zandik raised an eyebrow, "is that a commendable trait?"
"My kind says so. Whether good is a subjective or objective assessment or not is up to interpretation." You answered noncommittedly. "I don't think that's right. Our soul splits apart until we're just… empty. We lose some memories in the process."
"But functioning?"
"In a sense, yeah, but we lose a part of ourselves like memories and well, hair color, I guess." You nodded. "Why are you so curious?"
"Since you have rejected my confession, I want to try my hand at seducing a copy of yours instead," Zandik said. You couldn't tell whether he was joking with his naturally piercing red eyes. "Until then, you are not allowed to asexually reproduce without my authorization. Understood?"
You laughed. Unaware of his arsonist crimes, you willingly indulged his words.
"I owe you my ears, so it's only right that I'll listen to your commands, Zandik."
"Good." Zandik grinned, shark-like.
"What a good test subject you are, (Y/n)."
Centuries later, that closing sentence will continue to remain true.
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Since then, his life has changed. Multiplied, even. Upon studying your genetic makeup, he found ways to duplicate himself as well. Despite his feats in science, Zandik remained unhappy.
Deep down, all the Harbingers pity the Doctor who cannot save his most loved one. That includes both Columbina and Arlecchino.
No one protests even when harmful orders are given; everything appears fine until the symptoms are felt. Because the organism— the astral descender— has no nerves or voice, he continues to assume that the patient is not in pain.
The patient needs peace but because they are not to speak, they remain silent, and the need persists.
The patient wants to eat and breathe fresh air, but because such desires might hurt the feelings of the doctor who thinks he has done everything needed, the patient remains quiet, contemplating desires out of fear of reprimand.
The original (Y/n) (L/n) suffers in silence. In a white room only accessible by a man who continues to nurse his unrequited love: Zandik.
No one else can enter this room.
He won't allow it. Only he can be obsessed with you.
The thought of you haunts him like a smiling reflection upon window panes— like a gift of a Trojan horse with nothing but your echoing laughter and hospital monitor beeps inside. Your thin limbs were marching clock hands with rusted gears that miraculously function till the end of time.
What is immortality for if every day was a death loop?
It is such a lonely concept…
You ought to be thankful that he's willing to be your eternal company.
"I endeavored to elicit a reciprocation of my sentiments from the latest subject. Regrettably, their discovery of my antecedent experiments transpired prematurely. Nevertheless, as asserted several times, it remains but a temporal inevitability until an iteration of yourself succumbs to having an interest towards me." Dottore hummed.
He held your feet.
He held Test Subject #01's feet.
If you spoke up, he would've bragged about how he was right. How people do love your songs. But no one knows if you can't or won't answer him. This one-sided conversation is the punishment for his hubris.
He took out a sharp knife and cut off one of your toes. You no longer feel any pain as you bleed into his hands. What a kind man the doctor is, for he blocked all your pain receptors years ago. It's a good thing you regenerate quickly.
That's what he loved and hated about you.
You only gave and gave.
But you never ran out of soul. You never ran your heart fully dry— and that left you ill. Zandik could never let you go.
You're already a part of him.
Hence, he must not make clones of exaggerated memories. He wanted your perfect yet healthy replica.
Praise be the white corpuscles extracted from your veins which had brought him new life. You were the reason for his research. You were the breath that gave his segments life. You were his muse, much like he was yours.
"Fear not, (Y/n)," he reassured with a measured tone. "Upon my mastery of the arts, I intend to reinstate your autonomy and awareness. Perhaps then, you shall find the organic inclination to reciprocate affection toward me by the 9806's trial. Until then…"
In other words, give him more time and he'll reinvent love.
He leaned his forehead against yours.
"I'm so, so sorry."
And ultimately, he'll reinvent YOU.
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"Can I have another piece of your scalp?"
"No."
"Do you not understand the weight of this research or must I expound on it further in another three-hour presentation?"
"Alternatively, you could start by saying that you're sorry," you raised an eyebrow. "I'm still not over the fact you randomly cut a piece of my ear when I was asleep, doctor. You know, I heard from the aranaras that white tulips are given to someone when they ask for forgiveness."
Zandik smirked.
"Regrettably, it seems that such an occurrence is unlikely to transpire. Do not expect such words and gifts from me."
You smiled.
"We'll see, we'll see."
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Taglist (pls notify if you wish to be on the taglist for the last two): @average-yandere-enjoyer @pix-stuff @sagekun @vennnnn-diagram @dilucragnidvr @tnsophiaonly @lsleepysimpl
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acourtofwhatthefuck · 9 months
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Loose Lips — Part Two (Eris Vanserra x Reader)
Finally got round to writing a part two to this after a sudden burst of inspiration. Here is Part One if you missed it.
This isn't proofread, so sorry if it's a pile of dicks. Enjoy!
Warnings: smuttysmutsmut 🌶️
✧: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・
The forest was undoubtedly beautiful. A place of sure serenity. Somewhere you’d always found peace.
Right now, you felt like nothing short of a thunderbolt in its flawless midst.
You shifted on your feet for what felt like the millionth time, pressing your back against a tree and crossing your arms over your chest. You wouldn’t be able to relax until this meeting was over with.
Rhysand’s violet eyes flicked over you, and he frowned. “Are you alright? Why are you so restless?”
Because we’re here to meet with Eris and the last time I did that I somehow, kind of, maybe ended up fucking him—
“Fine.” You quickly answered. “Pain. My cycle is coming.”
Rhys’s eyes softened. “We’ll make this as quick as possible. Once the prick actually deigns to show up.”
You didn’t have a shred of doubt that Eris’s tardiness was deliberate — a power play. And he could play all the games he liked, so long as he kept his damn mouth shut.
As if you’d summoned him with a thought, the Autumn male appeared out of a chill-kissed breeze, his crackling-fire-and-cinnamon scent enveloping you. You tried desperately to block it out — and the sinful thoughts that accompanied it. Of bare skin. Panting breaths. Moans—
“Afternoon.” Eris smirked, sliding his hands into his pockets. He offered Rhysand a cursory glance before turning his attention on you. “You’re looking radiant today, Y/N.”
You pursed your lips. Kept your mouth shut. You weren’t getting into it with him — weren’t giving him any ammunition to spill the truth of what had transpired a month earlier.
His lips twitched as he studied you. “What, no smartass response?”
“Cut the shit, Eris.” Rhys rolled his eyes. “Share your information so we can get out of here. We don’t wish to be subjected to your tedious company for any longer than is necessary.”
He cocked his head, and you hated that you noticed he’d cut his hair since you’d last seen him. “Do you not like my company?”
You knew his words were directed at you. He’d come here to play games, and you were having none of it. He allowed his gaze to linger on you for a second longer before turning to your High Lord.
“Well?” Rhys cocked an eyebrow.
Eris folded his arms. “The King of Hybern…”
You didn’t allow yourself to hear the rest of his sentence. For the first time in your career as Rhysand’s courtier, you tuned out, taking in none of the information that was being given. You didn’t hear a word of their discussion as you stared fiercely at a fallen leaf on the ground. You couldn’t.
Because it tortured you on a daily basis that you knew what the redhead’s voice sounded like when he was falling off that precipice into blissful release. The way it had hitched when he’d groaned deeply and spilled into you. It was all you could think about, and you couldn’t bear it.
Guilt had eaten away at you ever since. Guilt and regret. You should never have given yourself to Eris fucking Vanserra.
You only felt safe enough to tune back in when Rhys turned his gaze on you. He gave a subtle dip of his chin, and you returned it — the signal the two of you shared when you’d gleaned useful information to tuck away.
Never mind the fact that you didn’t have a single clue what that information may be.
“Alright, then.” Rhys spoke tersely to the Autumn lord. “Keep me updated. I’ll be in touch when I next need to meet with you.”
“Will it be you, High Lord?” Eris’s lips turned up. He glanced at you. “Or her? I must say, I find her far more appealing to look at.”
“I’ll keep it a surprise. Something to look forward to in your sad little life.” Rhys turned to you, holding out a hand. “Ready?”
You shook your head. “You go. I promised Madja I’d collect some herbs for her while I’m here.”
A small, pathetic part of you wanted to beg Rhys to stay; to keep you company and not leave you alone with Eris. But he was a busy male — far too busy for the drama you’d created for yourself. You plastered a smile on your face.
“I’ll see you at home, then.” He smiled. And without a goodbye to your tentative ally, he disappeared before your eyes.
Eris smirked as he turned to you. “And then there were two.”
“Leave me alone.” You pulled your foraging knife out, turning on your feet. You didn’t look back as you began to kick through leaves and twigs.
But, of course, he was hot on your trail. “That’s not a very nice thing to say to somebody who made you cum not once, not twice, but three times.”
You clenched your jaw, ignoring him as you knelt down in front of a cluster of plants. You would do better this time. You wouldn’t allow your mouth to run you down a path you couldn’t come back from.
He didn’t make it easy, though. Not as you tried to focus yourself solely on gathering the herbs Madja had listed. Despite the lack of conversation — or even acknowledgement of him — Eris pressed himself against a tree and watched you, absentmindedly cleaning his nails with the point of a dagger.
How could you ever have fallen into bed with him? You were such a damn idiot, risking everything for a few fleeting moments of passion. You tucked the herbs neatly away, pushing to your feet and brushing dirt and leaves from your breeches. You turned—
And stopped as Eris appeared in front of you. He smirked. “I’m still waiting, Y/N.”
You cocked an eyebrow. “For what?”
“For you to thank me for not spilling your dirty little secret.”
Prick. You shoved past him, ignoring his warmth, his scent.
He was at your side in seconds. “Aren’t you so relieved that I didn’t slip up and tell Rhysand about your little ride? I still could.”
Every last drop of your sensibility fizzled out. You couldn’t stop yourself from rounding on him. “Are you truly in a position to be threatening me? Both of us fucked up that night. What do you think Beron would have to say if he found out you’d bedded someone from the Night Court, of all places?”
“My father doesn’t care who I bed. I’m free to do whatever I please, so long as it doesn’t distract me from the ultimate goal.”
“Which is what, exactly?”
His amber gaze glittered, catching the sun. “World domination.”
You rolled your eyes. “How very cliche.”
You made to push past him again, to get the fuck out of there, but his hand was suddenly gripping onto yours. In seconds, he had you pressed against the body of a tree.
You clenched your jaw. “Get. The hell. Away from—”
The remainder of the sentence didn’t have a chance to so much as form as Eris’s mouth found yours.
The press of his kiss was hot and needy, and as his lips moulded with yours, he groaned.
It was that action that made you realise just how little space existed between your bodies. His hips were pinned to yours, keeping you in place, and the warmth of him seeped into you as your breasts brushed his chest. Within seconds — mere seconds of him kissing you — you felt him harden in his breeches. His groan seemed to vibrate through every part of him and into you.
And then he was tearing his lips from yours. Staring down at you. “Fuck, you taste amazing. I’ve thought about nothing but this,” he rolled his hips against you, making sure your attention went exactly where he wanted it, “for over a month, now. Tell me you’ve been just as crazed.”
You had been. Perhaps more so. But you swallowed. “I can’t.”
That didn’t deter Eris from slanting his lips over yours again. His tongue swiped out, brushing against the seam of your lips, and you were powerless against your need as you opened your mouth and allowed him to dip in.
You gasped at the first taste of him; something cool and crisp and smoky. And you knew you were done fighting, telling yourself you didn’t want this, as you grabbed him by the lapels of his jacket and hauled him more firmly against you.
He grunted as the hard evidence of his arousal pressed against your stomach. His lips slid from yours, dragging slowly over your cheek, and then the cut of your jaw, down to your neck.
“You’ll be the death of me.” He panted, pressing quick, chaste kisses to the hollow of your throat. “Tell me to stop.”
You swallowed, knowing there was no chance in hell of that. “No.”
And that single word — as much as it pained you to say it — dragged such a delicious, guttural noise from him, that you forgot entirely about who you were and why this was wrong. Nothing else mattered in that moment other than what Eris was doing.
Your mouth went so very, very dry as he pulled away to meet your gaze. And then lowered himself to his knees before you.
He was utterly uncaring of the dirt and leaves that stuck to his breeches as he clasped your legs. And the hard press of his hands felt scorching through your own pants. You wouldn’t be surprised to find that he’d turned the clothing to mere ash he dragged his palms up the backs of your legs and cupped your ass.
“You’re fucking mouthwatering.” He dipped in, pressing a kiss to your stomach through your shirt. “I need to taste you.”
“Holy gods.” You cursed, your head falling back against the tree. “Do it, then.”
Like a male entirely starved and desperate, his nimble fingers moved to the buttons on your breeches, making quick work of getting them undone. The second they were loosened enough, he yanked them down with a feral command that had heat rushing between your legs.
And he could scent that. You knew it. He inhaled deeply, and his responding moan was sinful.
“This is wrong.” Your voice was weak, useless, as your head fell back.
“So wrong.” Eris hooked his fingers into the thin waistband of your undergarments. Tugged them down..
You made no move to stop him. “And stupid. And selfish. And—”
Your words turned into a moan as he dipped in and dragged his tongue up the very centre of you.
A satisfied grunt left him, and he lifted your leg, hoisting it over his shoulder. It had you at a better angle, closer to him, so he could feast on you.
And feast, he did.
His mouth and tongue were renowned for wielding wicked, barbed words, but this was a different language entirely. His fingers dug into your legs as he buried himself between your thighs, licking and lapping and fucking devouring. He made his way up, scraping teeth over your clit, the sensation both pleasant and unpleasant. Before you had a chance to react, he soothed over the area with the pad of his tongue, and a bolt of white-hot pleasure surged through you.
“Oh, gods.” Breathy words escaped your lips. Thank the Mother above for the mammoth tree at your back that gave you the support to move as you wished to move, undulating your hips, grinding against Eris’s face.
And from the way he growled and feasted on you harder, you knew he liked it. He was becoming coated in you, painting himself with your wetness. With the roll of your hips picking up pace, he didn’t falter once.
“Look at you.” He breathed, eyes flicking up to drink you in. “You’re a fucking vision.”
“Stop talking and make me—oh.”
Your hips bucked as he slid a finger into you, the friction of his callused skin like a sinful bite you wanted more of. You didn’t know if you vocalised that, or if Eris simply read you well, but he quickly added a second finger, pumping them in and out.
“Just as you felt around my cock that night.” He panted. “Squeezing me like that.”
You threaded your fingers through his hair, needing to just…to just grab onto something. He seemed to like it as you pulled, and he thrust his fingers faster in return.
“I’m going to make you come on my fingers.” His tongue stroked at you. “And again on my cock.”
Somewhere, some steeled part of you wanted to give a smartass retort. But you were far too gone, splintering into tiny shards of pleasure against that tree. There was nothing, in that moment, besides the sensations Eris Vanserra dragged from between your thighs. No long-lived feuds or tentative alliances or right or wrong.
It was just him. His fingers. His tongue.
And it sent you hurtling right off that blissful cliff edge into release.
As you came, you thought you maybe shouted loud enough to frighten the birds from the trees. Your pleasure was a fearsome force as it stormed your body, your mind, your soul, until you weren’t sure who you’d be without it. How you could survive not experiencing this weightlessness again.
And Eris…he seemed to enjoy your pleasure as much as you did. Even though his cock strained through his breeches, touched by nothing but torturous fabric, his tongue and fingers continued to guide you through your climax, and he peppered in filthy, scandalous words that you were far too fractured to make sense of.
Until he pulled back to look up at you again. “I’ve wanted you since the second I first saw you.” He said.
You weren’t sure you could deny, any longer, that this truly had been going on for that long. It didn’t start with that one night of bad decisions driving you into bed with him. It had been years and years of thinly-veiled threats and barbed words and insults and vitriol soaked in lust.
Every bit of hatred you’d ever directed at each other had been to try and avoid this — giving in to a carnal need that had existed between you since the first ever time your eyes had met.
You knew you didn’t have that strength, that resolve, anymore.
“I need you inside me.” Your voice was rough, raw. You reached down, shamelessly yanking Eris to his feet by the fabric of his jacket, not caring that your desperation showed. “Fuck me.”
You wanted it — him — hot and hard and fast and certainly not gentle. You wanted the bark of the tree biting into you as he pounded you from behind. You wanted him roaring as unguarded as you had.
“You’re a little brat.” Was all he responded. And then he was kissing you again.
You allowed him the control of your lips as your fingers tore at the front buttons on his breeches. Nothing was moving fast enough, and you were hot all over, desperate to feel him pulsing deep inside you—
Y/N. I need you back here.
Rhysand’s voice in your head was akin to be plunged in ice-cold water. Damn daemati. You froze in place, your hands falling still.
Eris didn’t seem to notice as he kissed his way along your jaw.
Y/N. Rhys spoke into your mind again. Get back as soon as you can. Need to discuss Azriel’s report.
You sucked in a breath, planting your hands on Eris’s arms. You pushed him off you. “I have to leave.”
He paused, surprise crossing his face. “What?”
“I can’t — I’m needed back home.” Clarity was dawning on you more and more, paired with guilt. You’d fucked up again. You tried to shake the feeling off as you yanked your underwear and breeches up in one go. “I can’t do this.”
“Seriously?” Eris cocked an eyebrow. “You’re leaving now?”
It was an effort not to glance down at the very unsatisfied bulge still pressing through his breeches. “Rhys just spoke into my thoughts. He needs me back.”
“How convenient.”
Of course he didn’t believe you. You had to admit, it didn’t look great — getting an earth-shattering orgasm out of him and then leaving.
But perhaps it was a blessing from the Mother. Perhaps she was stopping you taking it too far a second time.
“Believe what you want.” You pushed past Eris, buttoning your breeches up. “I answer to my High Lord first and foremost.”
“Go running back to him then.” Eris shrugged. And if you weren’t mistaken, you thought that a strange quality lay in his tone. Perhaps hurt, or…or jealousy. “He says jump and you say how high, right?”
“You have your High Lord, Eris,”  you smoothed over the wrinkles in your clothes, “and I have mine.”
He pressed his back against the tree, watching with an unreadable expression as you checked yourself over.
And then the corner of his mouth tipped up. “You’ll be back, sweetheart.”
You shot him a glance over your shoulder. “That is a very, very bad idea.”
You winnowed out of there before he could respond.
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gtgbabie0 · 10 months
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Drunk, but oh so in love.
{A drunk Spencer Reid is very affectionate, not that you're complaining.}
I love him sm it’s crazy, enjoy my lovelies!! 💕💕
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Quiet summer nights like this are always nice when the air isn’t too stuffy and the moon is high, accompanied by a nice breeze. You’re sitting on your sofa with a new colouring book on your lap as you colour away, partly paying attention to the random ocean documentary that was playing on the tv.
You enjoyed the serenity, although you were starting to miss Spencer since he had been stolen away from you by Derek Morgan, claiming that he and Spencer deserved a ‘boys' night’ after having a great week, he didn’t seem all that thrilled at the idea but Derek had a way of talking that made it impossible to say no.
You looked over to your phone, it was nearing midnight and just as you were about to turn away it rang, and you smiled when Spencer’s name showed up, vibrating a few times before you pressed down on the green button holding the device to your ear.
“Hey-” and before you could even get a whole sentence out you heard rustling from the other side of the line, along with a pair of voices arguing. Spencer and Derek.
“Kid- wait-”
“No give it to me, I wanna say hi-”
“You can’t- just-”
“Give me my phone Morgan-”
You heard Derek groan and then more shuffling. You couldn’t help but giggle at the thought of the pair fighting for the phone.
“Hey sweetheart- sorry ‘bout that, Derek stole my phone, can you believe that?” You smile at the genuine disbelief in Spencer’s tone, and you can hear Derek say something about how he ‘didn’t steal it’ and a very long sigh.
“Anyway, I’m coming home now. I missed you, missed you a lot and I love you… so much” he says, and you practically hear the exhaustion that laces through his tone.
“I missed you too baby” you smile as you start to put away your colouring book, deciding you should also probably get him a change of clothes ready for when he returns.
“Missed you more, and your voice- god I can’t wait to come home I want- hey!” And before Spencer could inevitably embarrass himself, and you, Derek takes the phone from his hand with a frustrated huff holding him back with his arm as he talks to you.
“Your man had one too many, and he’s been asking for you nonstop for the past hour,” he tells you and the thought has your chest blooming with love, but then it daunts on you, a drunk Spencer who rambles about you without a care who’s listening, yeah you think you’ll worry about that a different day.
“Wonderful, you’ll call Hotch? because he’s not going to work tomorrow. ” You sigh, trying to keep a stern tone and Derek agrees with a chuckle and a ‘Yes ma’am' whilst still trying to keep Spencer at an arm's length as he fights for the phone and you can hear him in the background.
“Derek, Derek, Derek- tell her I love her. I love you, sweetheart!” You giggle as you say your goodbyes to a very exhausted-sounding Derek Morgan before hanging up the phone with a sigh, you were in for a very long night.
Which in all honesty was such an understatement as you try to help Spencer walk up a flight of stairs after he downright refused to take the elevator, something about a ‘terrifying experience’ that then had him drunkenly rambling off horrifying elevator accidents.
He leans all his weight onto your side as he tries to kiss you. Your arm wraps securely around him and at this point, you’re practically dragging him up the stairs and you start to deeply regret telling Derek you would be fine taking him back up to the apartment by yourself.
Eventually, by some miracle, you got him into the apartment, guiding him to take a seat at the table as you pour him some water. You plop a few ice cubes into the glass before placing the cool beverage on the table and you notice the way his eyes don’t leave you, he looks almost star-struck.
“Are you going to drink the water hmm?” You ask inching the glass closer to him, his eyes seem to glisten with admiration.
“You’re really pretty” he whispers as if it was a secret meant for only you to hear and you can’t help but giggle. You watch as his eyebrows knit together with an almost offended expression, “No, I’m being serious. It’s true you’re beautiful” and his words only make you chuckle all the more.
“Come on, drink up then we’ll go to bed,” you tell him, pushing the hair that frames his face and tucking it behind his ear. He smiles up at you as you press a gentle kiss to his forehead, hand resting on his cheek before you go and find him something more comfortable to wear.
Spencer practically downs the entire glass before clumsily jogging into the bedroom, tripping over air as he enters the dimly lit room with a small- ‘Crap!’
You gasp as you watch him fall forward and, luckily, onto the bed, “Sorry” he chuckles, sitting up as you walk over to him, “I just missed you” he suddenly stands up, his hands cupping either side of your jaw as he starts to pepper gentle kisses all over your face.
You try to push yourself away, telling him that you both should sleep as it’s nearing two in the morning but all attempts are fruitless.
“I love you so much” he smiles as his eyes study your face, “So so so much”
“I love you too Spence, now sit down before you hurt yourself,” you say and he presses one last final kiss to the tip of your nose, and with that, he finally sits back down on the bed as he starts to unbutton his shirt.
You turn to go and grab his PJs and by the time you face him his shirt is stuck halfway off his head and he lets out a frustrated groan as he tries to tug the shirt off with half the buttons still done up.
“Oh my- baby, stop. stop” you tell him moving his hands away as you start to undo the buttons and once he’s finally released from the confines of his uncomfortable button-up, you hand him an old Star Trek shirt and he happily pulls it over his head, his hair all tussled from the action.
“Thank you honey” he smiles as his hands settle against your hips, tugging you closer to him, his head resting against your stomach, “You know Derek was wrong,” he tells you matter-of-factly.
Your fingers brush through his hair, “About what hmm?” You ask, genuinely curious as to where this was going.
He looks up at you with an almost proud smirk, “I’ve got game” he says, pride bursting through his chest and he holds you a little closer.
You chuckle, “Well, I mean you wooed me so” you trail off, as he nods against you and you can tell by the look on his face that the exhaustion is creeping up on him.
“Yeah, and you’re- you’re just extraordinary, so I must be doing something right,” he says, and you would be lying if you said his words didn’t make you feel a little giddy.
You smile down at him before leaning to press a kiss to his hairline, “Put on these and I’ll go get you some more water, then we’ll go sleep, yeah?” you whisper handing him a pair of joggers because god knows the apparent gets unbelievably cold at night. And he nods watching with love-sick eyes as you walk out of the bedroom.
And sleep he does, but not before telling you he loves you about one hundred times, before he curls up against you with his leg thrown over yours, his hand splayed across your soft belly as he snores against your shoulder. And you prepare yourself to spend the day looking after a very hungover Spencer Reid, not that you’re complaining of course, there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for him.
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halfvalid · 7 months
Text
the blade daughter, pt. 3
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ABOUT
pt. 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3
alternate title: dracule mihawk cures your daddy issues!
rating: mature
characters: live action!roronoa zoro | fem!reader | live action!dracule mihawk | live action!straw hat ensemble
pairing: live action!roronoa zoro x fem!reader
word count: 23.6k total | 7.3k this part
description: you finally soothe the uncertainty you've had surrounding going out and making a life of your own. somewhere inside, you find the bravery to finally tell zoro how you'd feel about him.
tags: mihawk's daughter!reader, female reader, canon-typical violence, cursing, no use of 'y/n', pet names per mihawk ('dear', 'darling', 'sweetheart', 'little hawk'), emotional hurt/comfort, slow burn, kissing, confessions, a lil suggestive at the end
author’s note: ANDDDD SHE'S DONE!!! this was a wild 8 day long ride of writing, i'm a bit uncertain about the ending so please tell me what you thought of it!! hopefully you liked the fic, thank u so so much for reading.
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The two of you emerged from the room a little while later. You’d finished cleaning up, and Zoro had kept you company as you cleaned both his swords and Hiru. The both of you walked together afterwards, wandering into the kitchen where Sanji had whipped up a meal. 
“We’re close to the Grand Line,” Nami reported, having apparently steered the ship far enough away from the other pirates to leave the helm alone. “Should reach the mountain by early morning.” She glanced over at you. “Kuraigana Island first, right?” 
“Yeah,” you affirmed. “The Grand Line is… screwed, though.”
“We’ll be fine,” Luffy said brightly. You just shrugged, taking a seat at the table. “Zoro! Did you get everything cleaned up?” Zoro had changed into a fresh shirt, one not so bloodstained, and he gave a curt nod. “Good. Come and eat so we can get ready for tomorrow?” 
Sanji passed you a bowl, and you let out a thin breath. Somewhere in the back of your mind, you wondered how and when this had become your norm—it’d been a week with the Straw Hats, now, and— 
You dropped your chopsticks in your hand. It’d been a week. “Fuck,” you said, the word dropping out from between your lips before you could stop them. Your entire body had gone rigid, pink flushing up your arms and face as something burned deep inside of you. 
Everyone’s heads had snapped up to look at you, matching concerned expressions on all of their faces. “I, um—” you said, scrambling up from your seat, words too big in your mouth. You opted not to finish them, dropping your sentence as you yanked your shell phone out of your jacket pocket. “Sorry, I—” 
You shook your head, hurrying out of the kitchen. The cold gust of the ocean breeze hit heavy on your face, and you let out a breath, the gust of air exhaling out of your chest in a rush. You heard footsteps behind you, but the panic hadn’t bled out of your veins entirely, and your hands shook as you tried to open your phone. 
Zoro’s hand was pressed over yours before you could snap the case open. You stared down at it, and your gaze lifted, the tremble of your hands subsiding as his warm grasp sunk deep into your skin. “What’s up?” he asked, low and steady. 
“I, um—” you swallowed hard, hitching breath soothing at his touch. “Um. It’s—I have to call my dad.” 
Zoro was serene, tone even and still. His words from before echoed around in your head, the proclamation of not having patience. It’d been untrue after all. “Did something happen?” 
“I’m supposed to have dinner with him,” you blurted. “Tonight. I’ve never missed it before. Because I’ve always been on the island, in our—I’ve never missed it before. I’ve been with you all for too long.” 
“I’m sure he’d understand,” Zoro said, though his hand didn’t fall from yours. He paused, lips parted as his eyes ran along your face. “Or is it something you’re upset about?” 
“I don’t have friends,” you whispered, words fierce. “I don’t go places. I stay at home. This life isn’t mine. It’s—” 
“I don’t think you should dictate what you do based on what your father does,” Zoro interrupted. His tone wasn’t harsh, exactly—but it was strong, tone firm, jaw set as he spoke. “So you miss one dinner. So you’re out and about for longer than a week. Does it matter?” 
Does it matter? Your heart pounded in your chest, and you took in a steady breath, trying to soothe the adrenaline that still pulsed in your veins even now. “I don’t… I’m not used to this,” you admitted, somehow managing to keep the contact of your eyes even as your brain screamed at you to look away. “I’m not used to being away from home.” 
“Everyone starts somewhere,” Zoro said. 
You hesitated. His hand moved carefully away from yours, nudging your fingers to open the phone. Your gaze dropped, staring at the little snail waiting for you inside, nestled in his little bed of velvet. You picked it up, tucking it into your ear as your shaking hands dialed Mihawk’s number. 
He answered on the first ring. “Hello there, darling,” he said, and you closed your eyes, a soft exhale leaving your lungs at his voice. “Are you calling me about dinner? I’ll be there in a few hours, I promise. Just finishing up over here.” 
“No, actually, um—” you cut yourself off, teeth coming down to halt your tongue. You opened your eyes, turning to glance tentatively over at Zoro. Does it matter? he had asked. Which… it did, right? You weren’t a part of the Straw Hats. You hadn’t joined their crew; you’d been insistent on that, pushing away any idea of a life out at sea in exchange for the comfort and familiarity of your home lifestyle. But you’d been making bonds with them despite, and helping them out with their ship, and fighting alongside them in battle. And you’d just patched up Zoro’s wounds a mere hour earlier. You didn’t make friends.
But you were making them. 
“I’m not going to dinner this week,” you said, the words all slurred as they spilled from your mouth. There was a pause of surprise on Mihawk’s line before he spoke again. You squeezed your eyes shut, feeling Zoro’s gaze on you. 
“Finally departed from the nest, have you, darling?” Mihawk said. His voice was soft—tender, almost. “Very well, then. Any idea when you’ll be on the island next, or shall we keep it a suspended date?” 
“I should be home in a few days,” you said, voice hitching in your breath. “I’ll—I’ll call you! I don’t know what I’m going to do afterwards, but I’ll—I’m not going to just disappear.” 
“Well, of course,” Mihawk said simply. You tightened the squeeze of your eyes, trying to suppress the tingling prickles at your waterline. “I’m glad you’re making friends, dear.” 
You made a face, letting out a breathy scoff. A defense mechanism, really. “Don’t get mushy on me, old man.” 
“Me? Mushy?” There was a staticky scoff crackling over from Mihawk’s side of the line. It was such a simple conversation, so—why was it driving you to tears? “I could never, darling, do you even know me? I’ve got to fly, anyway—there’s some pesky pirates around here I’ve got to deal with.” 
“Bye, dad,” you said, the words choking up your throat, all raggedy at the edges, too big as you shoved them up and through your mouth. They grazed your tongue, but the points weren’t edges; they didn’t draw blood. “I—um.” 
The Dracules did not say I love you. Your father was doting, certainly, but he expressed his affection in far more unspoken ways. Presents from all four Blues. A weapon of the highest caliber quality when you were thirteen. Personal lessons in sword fighting. The murder of anyone who dared send an off look in your direction. 
“Me too, little hawk,” Mihawk said simply. “Now go have fun.” 
The den den mushi let out a soft little croak, signaling that Mihawk had hung up. You let your hand fall, the fingers holding the case of your phone going slack. Air punctured your lungs as you inhaled, the salty, crisp breeze loosening your muscles with every breath. 
“Are you alright?” Zoro asked. The words were gruff, awkward. Like he wasn’t used to saying them. You tightened your grip on your case, and then tugged the snail out of your ear, setting it carefully back where it belonged. You met Zoro’s gaze, heart thudding a bit faster as you saw flickers of concern in his eyes. 
“Yeah,” you said. “I think I am.” 
The sun shone bright on your face, the weather of the Grand Line being more forgiving today as the ship sailed carefully through the ocean. Your route was still towards Kuraigana Island, although you were growing more split about it by the second. You’d just had a conversation with Mihawk a day or so ago about you not being at the house—and the fact that you’d have to choose whether to go home and potentially never see the Straw Hats again was a decision that gripped heavy at your heart. 
“Looks like you’ve got a lot on your mind.” You glanced up to see Zoro at your side, forearms propping at the Going Merry’s railing as he gazed out at the ocean. You shrugged, eyes flickering down his side profile before falling back to your hands. 
“I don’t know,” you said. “Just thinking about what to do, I guess.” 
Zoro fixed you with a look. “You should try not doing that.” 
A startled laugh escaped your throat. “What? Thinking?” 
“It gets old,” Zoro said with a firm nod, brow slightly creased to shield his eyes from the sun. “I’d recommend dropping it for at least a few hours. You’re getting wrinkles.” One of his hands moved upwards to nudge against your forehead, and you ducked, another laugh gracing the edges of your lips. 
“Right,” you said, dubious. “How are your wounds?” 
“I’ve taken worse,” Zoro said with a shrug. “Though I guess I’ve still got that one, huh.” He grimaced, lips tugging back to bare his teeth into a scowl. It took him a while to speak again, and you turned your gaze back towards the ocean, waiting for the unspoken words to leave his lips. Minutes ticked by, but you just basked in the sun, trying to air your mind of any thoughts. Maybe Zoro had a point, there—sometimes it really wasn’t necessary to think at all. 
When Zoro finally spoke, his words were quiet; muttered under his breath. You had to strain to hear them, as the thin ocean breeze swallowed them up almost immediately. “I really thought I could beat him.” 
You huffed out a breath, unsure of what to say. Unsure if Zoro even wanted you to say anything. Your grip on the boat’s railing tightening, palm running across the soft wood. You found words falling out of your mouth anyway, though, although you yourself were surprised by them—“You can.” 
Zoro glanced up at you, surprised. “Maybe not now,” you hastened to say, not wanting to add to his clearly already-inflated ego. “But you’re good. You’re good enough to beat him, eventually. In a few years, given the proper time and training. I think…” You swallowed down the phlegm in your throat, alarmed by how wet your voice was starting to sound. You took in a breath, steadying your tone, making certain your voice wasn’t quite so thin or reedy. “I think that’s what scares me about you.” 
“I’m sorry,” Zoro said, all low and hushed. You just shrugged. 
“I don’t mind,” you answered. You felt his eyes on you, burning like a sun on fire, like the stars dotting his skin were crisping over your skin, charred and burnt and broken. Or maybe it wasn’t quite so destructive. Maybe it was a tender fire, crowning a pile of wood and cared for with iron stakes, embers glowing deep in the night to keep warmth fueling a pot of soup, or healing ragged hands after a long battle. 
“Let me get you a drink.”
Zoro disappeared. He returned with a flask, handing it over to you after unscrewing its cap. You knocked it back—it was rich but bland, all dry and earthy. Sake. You’d pegged him more as a beer guy. “Thanks.” 
Zoro’s gaze didn’t move from your figure. It was warm, you decided then. The swordsman was vicious at times, relentless in his fight, sinewy figure slashing cuts into flesh as he sparred with his enemies. But there was a distinction behind the hot, heavy iron of those glares at the look at which he placed upon you now. You couldn’t go as far to say his eyes were tender, or soft. But they were warm. Fire was a calamitous thing, but it had its blessings. 
“Let me take you out,” Zoro said suddenly. Your entire body froze, murmurs of warmth and tingling buzzes pricking up and down your spine. Something inside you lurched—no, it didn’t lurch, didn’t have the unpleasant sensation associated with it. It was softer, burning, guttural. Like a sharp knife cutting straight through your abdomen, sliding into your stomach, prying apart the bones like they were putty. Your chest squeezed inwards, heart pulsating with soft pangs of something. Hunger; desire, maybe. Yearning. 
“Why?” you asked. Zoro just shrugged, effortlessly casual in his movements. You saw a hitch in his throat, a flicker of something in his eyes, a strain in his jaw. Not so effortless after all. “Actually, more importantly—where?” 
“I’ll figure something out,” Zoro answered. “Is that a yes?” 
You turned, glancing up at him tentatively. “I’m not used to this sort of thing,” you said carefully. Zoro just shrugged. He still looked effortless, all guarded, but you could see the tremors and quivers underneath. 
“Neither am I.” 
You pursed your lips, raising your face to let the sun glow down onto your skin. “I have a rule, though,” you said, voice lifting up, more of a tease now. There was a ghost of a smile at the edge of your words, although your mouth wasn’t shaped in one. It was hesitant, careful not to scare you, really; creeping on you inch by inch. “I can’t go out with men who haven’t beaten me in combat.” 
Zoro snorted. “I have beaten you,” he said. “But if you want a rematch—” 
“Let’s not strain your injuries too much.” Zoro let out a scoff, but it was light-hearted, laced with amusement. You just shook your head, the dawning smile at the edges of your lips now, tugging them softly upwards. “I accept a loss when I get served one. You beat me, fair and square.”
“So I get to take you out now,” Zoro murmured, words careful, hovering in the air just barely out of his lips. He turned towards you, the sun outlining his face with a soft glow of gold and orange. He didn’t smile, but there was that soft, burning look again, lips slightly parted, taking in air. “That’s the rule, isn’t it?” 
“Yeah,” you said. “It is.” 
“Tonight, then,” Zoro said. “Ten. Aftercastle.” 
You spent some time contemplating what to wear. You hadn’t brought a very expansive wardrobe along with you, only the essentials, so there wasn’t much to choose from—just some shirts and pants, no dresses or skirts in the bare bones of your luggage. You eventually picked out your favorite of the grouping, sliding your signature jacket on like usual, Hiru fastened securely in its scabbard at the back. 
Zoro was waiting at the afterdeck when you arrived, dressed in a dark wrap shirt and his usual green obi. The cloth was nicer, though: his pants were missing their usual wear and tear, and his shirt looked to be made of finer cotton. “Hi,” you said, slipping up next to him. The tangerine tree’s leaves brushed at your ear, and you glanced up at it. The fruit was ripe, round and as bright orange as Nami’s hair. 
“Hey,” Zoro replied. One of his forearms was propped against the afterdeck railing, and the other wrapped around the side. You put your hand beside his, pinky just inches away from his. “Do you know any constellations?” 
“Some,” you said, squinting up at the sky. You could point a few of them out, but not many—the sky was cloudy tonight, most of the stars blocked out by dull puffs of gray and blue. “You?” 
“No,” Zoro answered. “Was never really interested in that kind of thing.” He glanced over at you. You’d turned your attention on the trees, again, plucking one of the tangerines off the branches. The tree trembled, its leaves quivering with soft swaying motions. You dug your nails into the flesh, peeling it carefully. “Why’d you just stay home?” 
“I don’t know,” you said with a shrug. “My dad used to not let me leave. He stayed with me until I was maybe twelve, for the most part. Then he started going out more, but he didn’t want me to come. Something about it being dangerous. He dropped the ban when I was sixteen, but…” you hesitated, tucking the shredded pieces of tangerine peels in your pocket. “I just kind of stuck with it, I guess.” 
“Weren’t you lonely?” 
“Kind of.” You broke the orange in half, moving on to pick at the pith with your fingernails. You gathered that up, too, little white lines piling up in the crease of your palm. 
“Yeah, me too.” 
“He always wanted me to leave, I think,” you said. “To find my own life. I was always happy staying there with him, though. Or waiting for him.” 
“You wouldn’t be abandoning him by leaving,” Zoro said. 
“Logically, I know that.” You peeled a piece of orange off from a half, offering it to Zoro. He took it, carefully pushing it between his teeth. He broke skin, a burst of piquant citrus juice dripping on his lower lip. Your eyes lingered there a moment too long, but you looked away a second later, speaking again. “I think it’s just a habit, really. I worry.” 
“I mean, he’s a Warlord of the Sea. I think he can take care of himself.” 
“It’s not that I’m worried about,” you said with a sigh. You popped a slice of orange in your mouth, sucking at the tart juice. “I don’t want him to get lonely.” 
“That’s not really your responsibility,” Zoro answered. His pinky crept closer to your hand, from where you’d returned your grip on the railing. His touch was feather-light, a soft breath of skin against skin that was there and gone again within a moment. “Did you think any more about it?” 
“I didn’t,” you said. “Took a page out of your book.” 
“It’ll come to you eventually,” Zoro said. “Like that one Shanks guy said—actually, I don’t remember the quote. Ask Luffy about it in the morning. He’ll probably go on for a few hours.” 
You snorted. “You’re kind of bad at giving advice, Zoro.” The name came easily, and you stopped, feeling the syllables on your teeth. It was comforting. Natural. 
Zoro seemed a tad bit offended by that. “At least I’m trying,” he muttered, voice defensive but not hostile. “Onto lighter topics?” 
You popped another tangerine slice in your mouth. “Like what?” 
“Nothing light about my life, so I’ve got no idea.” You snorted, choking on the orange that’d made its way halfway down the passage of your throat. You coughed, shaky laughs escaping your lips as you cleared your airways. An amused smile had perched on Zoro’s face, eyes glimmering with warmth as he watched you.
“That was unnecessarily edgy,” you protested. You finished with your tangerine, letting the pith flutter out of your palm, some of the white floss sticking. You didn’t mind it. 
“Got a laugh out of you, didn’t it?” Zoro nudged you, the skin of his finger pressing fully against your pinky. This time, he didn’t move away, letting the warmth of his skin bleed into yours. 
“You never answered my question.” You raised your pinky, lifting it to brush against Zoro’s knuckle. Carefully, you slipped it into the gap of his interdigit, looping your fingers together so they were intertwined. Zoro exhaled shakily—you glimpsed his other arm moving away from the railing, lowering to his side. “Why you wanted me out here, I mean.” 
Zoro pulled up a flask, unscrewing the cap with one hand. He didn’t drink, though, just held the bottle suspended in his hand. He didn’t say anything for a while, letting the soft rush of water from below and the tranquil rocking of the boat fill the silence. For a moment you thought he wasn’t going to say anything at all. To your surprise, though, he raised the flask to his lips, taking a short sip before letting his hand fall again. “You feel different.” 
“Care to be a little less vague?” 
“I don’t know if I can,” Zoro said carefully. His guard was up, that much was sure. You didn’t exactly blame him. “Things have changed since I joined Luffy. Sometimes I can’t describe it.” 
“The crew,” you said. “It makes sense.” 
“It does,” Zoro agreed. There was something magnetic about it, about him—something that drew you in. But you weren’t afraid of it, really. The Straw Hats weren’t scary. Their bared teeth weren’t fangs; their canines remained unsharpened at their maw. Their lure was more peaceful than that. “We like you. You fit in.” He paused, mouth slightly ajar, a tremor of something on his lower lip. “I like you.” 
Your lungs were empty, devoid of air. Something in your chest clawed at you, trying to climb up your throat, compressing your organs. Zoro’s touch burned into you, interlocked fingers searching an imprint in your skin. You were certain you’d feel it for hours; days; months; years after. “I think I like you too,” you said. 
“Well, you like my earrings,” Zoro said easily. “That’s a start.” 
You turned towards him, at his open stance, tucking yourself in the space between his figure at the side of the ship. The motion forced Zoro to raise your hands away from the railing, but he slid with the action easily, fingers fully interlacing with yours. His other arm remained propped along the ship, flask in his fingers, the skin of his forearm brushing against your side. Your free hand raised up to skim along his earrings, dull clinks of the metal sounding out at the emotion. “I do like your earrings.” 
“Enough to let me kiss you?” 
You tugged gently at Zoro’s earlobe, angling your face up to meet his. “Yeah.” 
Zoro kissed you square on the mouth, mouth full and open, hand slipping around your back. The edge of his sake flask dug into your spine, but it wasn’t a sharp pain, and you didn’t mind it. Your fingers tightened against Zoro’s, chasing his lips with yours, letting him swallow you whole. He was patient with it, smooth and languid; tongue licking into the crevices of your mouth, firm as he mouthed kisses at the lines of your lips. 
You breathed in from his lungs, chest getting tight as he sucked the air clean out of you. Still, you were addicted, utterly devoted as his fingers nudged against your hand and his tongue skimmed along your mouth. He was a good kisser, effortless and smooth, nearly elegant with his motions. He tasted like sake; earthy, woodsy, reminiscent of some sort of mushroom, maybe. It suited him well. 
You let out a little whimper as Zoro’s tongue pressed deep to your throat, and he swallowed it up, flicking lazily along the roof of your mouth. You were getting short of breath, though, so you placed a gentle litany of faint kisses along his mouth before tilting your head back and letting the night air puncture your lungs. Zoro’s pupils had gone wide, deep black swallowing the walnut of his irises. His hand pulsed against yours, steady as ever, but he didn’t speak.
“I like more than your jewelry,” you said, staring down at where your fingers tangled with his. They looked like two pieces of a puzzle, extremities manipulated to slot along each other, palms molded together. “I like the way you move, and the way you fight. I like your face.” You hesitated, playing with Zoro’s fingertips to distract you from your words. 
“You don’t have to say it,” Zoro said. 
“No, I think I do.” A ghost of a smile flickered up your mouth; a corpse, really, one that had forgotten it wasn’t really dead after all. “I like you, Roronoa Zoro.” 
Zoro’s fingers squeezed tighter against yours. There was no click, no noise of finality, no settlement of a suspended thread. You supposed it didn’t work like that. Life didn’t stop and end. You went on. You’d see Zoro in the morning, again, after you’d gone to sleep, and things would continue like normal. “Okay,” he said. “Late enough for you to go to bed, yet?” 
“I could go either way,” you answered. “Staying out here wouldn’t be so bad either.” 
“Fine by me,” Zoro said, not moving from where he stood. “So, Lady Dracule. Where to next?” 
“Wherever the breeze takes me,” you answered, but there was a decision settling down in your chest. One you weren’t so afraid to look at anymore. 
Kuraigana Island was just as you’d left it, sky dark as night even in the middle of the day, rotted ground crunching dust and rocks underneath your feet. The Going Merry had docked in one of the number of homemade boat berths Mihawk had made sometime in your youth. 
Usopp let out a low whistle as the Straw Hats stepped onto the island, head practically turning around in a 180 degree spin as he craned his neck to look around. “You live here?” 
“It’s quaint,” you said defensively. 
Nami gave you a sympathetic look. “It really isn’t.”
“Why is the sky black?” Luffy murmured in amazement, casting his gaze upwards to the overhang of rumbling clouds that existed perpetually over the island. “Have you never seen sun in your life?” 
You rolled your eyes, leading them through the gravelly path up to your house. Their reactions were, well, nothing short of the expected—Sanji’s eyebrows lifted, and Zoro let out a low whistle as he took in the sight. 
“It’s like Kaya’s house,” Usopp breathed. “But… bigger. And more spiky!” 
“It needs a paint job,” Nami deadpanned. You snorted. 
“I’ve been trying to get him to renovate for forever. Good luck.” You cleared your throat, suddenly awkward as the group walked closer and closer to the house. Your footsteps slowed, until you came to a full stop a few meters off the front door. The Straw Hats grouped around you, curious. “Just… don’t be weird, please. Nami, don’t steal anything unless it looks like it hasn’t been cleaned in thirty years. I only bother to polish the important stuff.” 
“Is that an open invitation to rob your house?” Nami asked with a snort.
“Do you have any food?” Luffy asked. 
“Probably not. My dad can’t cook for shit. Sanji can make something,” you said. “Our kitchen’s kinda nice.” 
“Working in a Warlord’s kitchen? I’d be honored,” Sanji said, with a little flourish of his hand. You rolled your eyes, but Luffy at least seemed satisfied. You glanced over at Zoro, who was the only one of the group who hadn’t said anything up to now—his lips were set into a thin line, but he met your gaze, and they flickered upwards just a quarter of an inch. The action was reassuring, almost, and you were soothed enough to start walking again.
The door flung open before you reached it, although the sudden motion didn’t startle you like it did to your compatriots. Dracule Mihawk stood in the doorway, dressed in his usual hat and jacket, Yoru heavy off his shoulders like usual. “I thought I heard footsteps,” your father trilled, voice wonderfully monotone as he bent in front of you, taking your hand to press a gentle kiss upon your knuckles. “Have you brought your friends along, darling?” 
“Clearly,” you said with a soft laugh. It was like all the tension evaporated from your body as soon as your father got near, and you found his hand, giving it a tight squeeze before turning to your friends. “Do you need introductions, or do you know them all already?” 
“I only remember the future pirate king and the swordsman,” Mihawk said with a dismissive wave. “Oh, and Yasopp’s child. It’s no matter, really. Well, come on in, you’re letting in the cold air.” 
Usopp stuttered something incomprehensible about his father, but Mihawk had already disappeared. You glanced over your shoulder at the rest of the Straw Hats. “He’s like that,” you said apologetically. “Just… come in.”
They followed you into the house, glancing around the lobby to take in the decor. You had to admit, a lot of it was rather gaudy, but it wasn’t like Mihawk cared much about what adorned the walls, and you had little resources to work with. Sanji made quick work moving to the kitchen after you made sure that Mihawk hadn’t prepared dinner. 
“So,” Nami said, the words mulling around in her mouth as she lounged by the kitchen island. “Nice place.” 
“It’s kinda scary-looking,” Luffy said honestly. “Interesting choice of decoration. I guess if you like it, though.” 
“Are you okay on your own for a moment?” you asked, getting up from your seat. “I’m going to go talk to my dad.” Luffy nodded, and the others all hummed their assent. Zoro caught your gaze—soft, curious. You just gave him a reassuring smile and slipped out of the room. 
Mihawk was waiting in the living room, long body stretched supine along the couch, booted feet thrown up on the arm. You narrowed your gaze at it. “Don’t put your feet on the furniture,” you grumbled. 
“Sorry, dear,” Mihawk said, though he made no move to alter his position. “Did you end up getting that jacket for me?” 
“I did,” you said, glancing through the satchel that hung at your hip. You pulled it out, folding it with a solid shake and holding it up for Mihawk to see. His golden eyes flickered up and down the garment, taking in the material. Black cotton twill, with red paisley silk as the lining, delicate red lace at the hem and sleeves. The lapels were wide, buttons shiny and black, and it used red stitching rather than black, giving a sort of exoskeleton look to it. Mihawk sat up, pushing his hat back. 
“It’s beautiful, darling. I love it.” 
You folded the jacket in half, slinging it across the back of the sofa before moving around to face Mihawk fully. “About the crew.” 
Mihawk glanced up to meet your eyes. “Yes?” 
“I…” you took in a breath, the inhale shaky in your lungs, bones and muscles rattling in your chest. “I think I’m going to stay with them for a little while, if you’re okay with it.” 
“The Straw Hat crew,” Mihawk said carefully, shaping the words on his mouth, tasting them on his tongue. “My daughter, part of the Straw Hat crew. Well, it’s not the most terrible-sounding thing to say, I suppose.” He paused. “No idea why you’d think I wouldn’t be okay with it, though, sweetheart. I’m not horrendous.” 
“Well, I figured—” you started, voice trailing out into a protesting whine. “You’d be against them? Garp sent you after them. One of them tried to kill you.” 
“Oh, you know I don’t hold grudges over such trifling matters,” Mihawk said with a dismissive wave. “Roronoa Zoro, right? He was watching you the entire time you entered. Wouldn’t take his eyes off you, darling.” There was a particular glint in his eyes, hunted, like he was searching for a quarry. “Something to tell me?” 
“No,” you said, too fast. Mihawk lifted both brows, and you broke almost easily. “Maybe. No. He’s—no.”
Mihawk clucked his tongue, sounding amused. “I suppose your rebel streak was bound to come out eventually. And from what you told me, he did beat you, so I can’t exactly complain.” You flushed, warmth heating up your skin, bringing a rosy blush to your cheeks. “Make sure he doesn’t get himself killed before I can fight him again, will you, little hawk? I’ve got my eye on that one.” 
“Okay, dad,” you muttered, but the tension of your shoulders had gone slack, and your muscles were loose. 
“Will you be leaving after dinner, or will you stay until the morning?” Mihawk asked, standing up to his full height. He stretched, sinewy limbs long and supple. He looked nearly odd without Yoru perched along his back. “I’ve missed you.” 
“Morning,” you answered. “I’ve missed you too, dad.” 
Mihawk smiled at you. “Go make sure our guests aren’t burning down the kitchen.” 
Dinner was less of an awkward affair than you’d expected. Usopp spoke the most through it, and Mihawk was fine to goad him on, occasionally switching topics to inquire about the rest of the crew. 
Sanji had made a fine meal; a grilled steak and onions with a side of asparagus to some kind of white sauce pasta you didn’t recognize. It felt… nice, really, having them all around you. Mihawk certainly knew how to socialize, and Luffy didn’t seem to mind his acerbic tendency. 
“And after I defeated all the enemy pirates,” Usopp was rambling on, “We hit a cannon straight into their mast, and it came crashing down! Oh, you should’ve seen it, man. It was me—well, Luffy—I guess he was the one that chucked the guy into the ship, or whatever. It wasn’t actually a cannon, but the details aren’t that important—”
“What about my little hawk?” Mihawk interrupted, and you had the vague sense to start whining. “I don’t suppose she just sat there throughout the whole fight.” 
“Oh, nah, she got some guys too I guess,” Usopp said, lazily waving an arm in the air. “She’s the one who stationed me at the cannon, she knew how great I was at it. She almost died to this one big dude—”
“I did not almost die!” you snapped. Usopp cackled out a hearty laugh. 
“No, she totally did. Thankfully for her, the great Captain Usopp came to her rescue—”
“Me,” Zoro muttered, words barely audible as he spoke them into his cup. You cracked a smile, and he glanced up, catching your eye. A tender look crossed his face. 
“Okay, yeah, it was Zoro who saved her,” Usopp admitted. “Cut the guy’s head straight off his body. But that’s just because I was busy fighting off the other pirates!” He motioned with his hands, mock-punching the air in front of him. 
Mihawk just raised his eyebrows. “Did he, now? I hope you thanked him properly for that, sweetheart.” 
You shot Mihawk a warning look. “Dad.” 
Mihawk didn’t let that faze him, raising his glass of wine to his lips. “You might want to take him around the island. There are some fairly romantic spots here, ones I brought your mother to while she was pregnant,” he said, mouth around the rim of his glass. You flushed, resisting the urge to lunge over the table at your father—clearly, he could see your vexation, mirth dancing in his eyes. 
Zoro didn’t say anything, eyes tilted downwards like there was something particularly interesting in his cup. Nami and Sanji were murmuring things to each other, and Sanji raised his voice to speak. 
“I knew there was something between the two of you! Come on, Lady Dracule, you could do so much better than the mosshead here—”  
“Shut it—” Zoro started. 
“You most certainly did not know, and you owe me fifteen hundred berry for that!” Nami said, offended. She elbowed Sanji firmly in the ribs, and he let out a low cough. Her head spun towards the head of the table, where Luffy was sitting across from your father. “Luffy, tell your cook to honor his bets.” 
“You bet on us?” you demanded, a squeak of embarrassment entering your voice as you protested. Nami gave you a look. 
“Please. You were obvious.” 
“Well,” Sanji jumped in, “Personally I thought you had better taste than—”
“I said shut it, waiter,” Zoro said, finally looking up to fix Sanji with a glare. He tilted his head to the side, one eyebrow raised, and you stifled a laugh. “And if I were you, I’d give Nami her money as soon as possible.” 
“This is so unfair,” Sanji muttered, but he fished a wallet out of his pocket and slapped a few bills onto the table. “There you are, madam. I hope you’re happy.” 
You groaned. “At the dinner table, really?” 
“Money waits for no one,” Nami said with a little wink, tucking her winnings carefully into a pocket of her skirt. 
“Sanji, did you make dessert?” Luffy wondered. Sanji rolled his eyes, but the sigh he let out was kind and good-natured. 
“Well, lucky for you, I did have the mind to bake some cookies while here.” He got up from his seat. You just gave him a dubious look; everyone had more or less finished with their food, though, so you got up, collecting the dishes to wash. 
You did chores, Nami hanging around you and lending her aid while the other Straw Hats got comfortable in guest rooms or whatever else. Zoro hadn’t budged from the dining room, apparently not interested in exploring the different parts of your house—you could just barely see him out of the kitchen doorway, nursing his drink as he stared thoughtfully into the distance. 
The familiar shape of your father’s jacket joined his side, and you narrowed your eyes, straining to hear. Mihawk had bent over the table, a pleasant smile on his face as he spoke. He didn’t bother to speak quietly, so everyone in the near vicinity heard his words— “If you hurt her, I won’t show the mercy I did the first time. My little hawk’s more important than finding a worthy opponent.”
“Dad!” you snapped, dropping the plate you were in the middle of washing. Mihawk didn’t even look in your direction, even as you stormed out of the kitchen to stand protestingly by the mouth. “Don’t—” 
“Oh, hush, dear,” Mihawk said with a dramatic eye roll. “I’m off to bed, then. I’ve got business in the morning.” He came over to you to brush another kiss along your knuckles. “I’ll be gone before you wake up. Safe travels.” 
“Good night,” you said with a sigh. Mihawk left, then, disappearing around the bend of the corner to head off to his room. 
“...I still don’t really forgive him for almost killing Zoro,” Nami said warily. Zoro got up from his seat, moving over to where the two of you had gathered in the kitchen. “But your dad’s fine, I guess. Not terrible, as far as fathers go.” 
“Yeah,” you agreed, then glanced apologetically towards Zoro. “I’m sorry about him.” 
“It’s fine,” Zoro said with a careless shrug. “It’s getting late. I’ll walk you to your room.” You nodded, drying your hands on a nearby kitchen towel and prompting Zoro to follow you up the steps. The house was large, a castle, really; all dark and winding, with long corridors and tall ceilings. Your bedroom was grand, on the second floor, with a sweeping balcony and wide windows that bore a full view of the island’s perpetual darkness. 
“What’d you say?” Zoro asked, stepping into the room. He glanced around, but didn’t remark in his surroundings, turning instead to look over at you. 
“I told him I’d be joining the Straw Hat pirates,” you said. Zoro smiled at that, the edges of his lips curling up. 
“Good,” he said simply. You moved towards him, forcing him to back up until he reached the plush of your bed. He sat down, eyes not flickering away from yours, soft brown that held an entire universe in them. Planets lined his cheeks, spatters of galaxies that you thought you might revolve inside. “Living here for years alone doesn’t seem like the most interesting life.” 
“It was fine while it lasted,” you said, bending your head down, lips hovering over his. Zoro’s hand came up to press firmly along your waist. “I think I like the ship a bit better, though.” 
“Hm,” Zoro murmured, eyes on your mouth. He tugged you down, but the kiss he pressed against your lips was chaste, and he was leaning back again before you knew it. “I decided, by the way. On whether I wanted your dad to like me or not.” 
You arched a brow, thinking back to that night so long ago when you’d first heard the words on Zoro’s lips. I’m not sure if I want him to like me. “Well?” 
“I do,” Zoro said, nudging against your chest, chin bumping along your shoulder. “It makes sense, with you.” 
A comfortable silence filled the space. His thumb ran a tender circle along the skin of your torso. “I should probably pack,” you murmured. 
“Eh, you’ll have time for that later,” Zoro said dismissively. You laughed, the sound full, straight out your throat. 
“Do I, now?” Zoro’s lip quirked, eyes grazing over your figure. You prattled on as if you didn't even notice. “Did you have something else in mind? You realize after this we have all the time in the world to be together—”
“I told you I was impatient,” Zoro interrupted, and then he was tugging you down, pressing a full kiss to your mouth again. You parted your lips to argue, but Zoro just took that as an opportunity to side his tongue in, and, well—this wasn’t so bad, either. One of your hands came to tangle in his hair, nudging his head just the slightest bit upwards to allow you better access. Zoro’s thumb didn’t stop making lazy revolutions into your skin. “Doesn’t seem like you mind.” 
“Shut up,” you mumbled against his lips. You leaned forward, pushing him back onto the bed, before pausing to lean down and unfasten the straps of his shoes. 
“You’re a real charmer.” Zoro didn’t complain, though, seeming more than pleased when you returned to kiss him, allowing him to fall back onto your bed now that you’d shed him of his footwear. “Little hawk, huh?” 
You huffed out a breath. “It’s stupid.”
“It’s cute,” Zoro said casually, one arm coming to prop behind his head. He drank you in properly, this time, from where you were on your knees on the mattress, unstrapping your own shoes before joining him up on the bed. “You are.”
You met his eyes, and a flicker of warmth crossed over your heart. For a soft, silent moment, you let it breathe. Let it exist there. Let the realization that you may one day love this man fill your soul. 
“Come here,” you said, climbing over to Zoro even as you spoke. “I’m going to kiss you again.” 
Zoro just grinned.  
The Going Merry was just as you’d left it, although Mihawk had provided you with any extra provisions the crew might’ve wanted for the rest of your journey. You’d packed up and brought along your stuff, too, managing to finally decorate your cabin in the ship more to your likeness. Everything was ready, and you stood at the edge of the aftercastle, Zoro to your side as you stared down at the island you’d called home for all the years of your life. 
But Kuraigana Island wasn’t your only home anymore, and neither was the hawk eyed man who resided in it whenever he was not busy doing something else. Mihawk had left in the early morning, but the ghost of his presence still warmed you. This way, it was easier to let go, you thought. This way, it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. 
“Casting off!” Luffy yelled, his voice puncturing the stillness of the island air from his usual spot on the goat at the ship’s bow. You turned away from the island, jacket lapping around your legs as the wind whipped against it. 
“Ready to go?” Zoro asked carefully. 
“Yeah,” you answered, turning away from the island. Zoro stood to your left, one hand perched on the hilt of his sword, the other relaxed at his side. His brows were creased, strong against the shimmer of the glinting sun just barely peeking through the darkness of the island. 
The fog washed his features in blue, all blurry around the edges, but you couldn’t help but think he was the most beautiful man you’d seen anyway. 
“I’m ready.”
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pt. 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3
taglist: @untoldshortsofthefandoms @ellisaworld @yeonieesss @sarcastic-sourwolf @rouzuchan @dashcrashbash @blossomedfloweroflove @ fangeekkk @winuvs @katiemrty @asexualimmortal @fayetheenthusiast @freedom-kitty @ren-ni @je4nc4tb0y @dwcode @albedosfiance @13-09-01 @dimplewonie @cellgore @ shabzy1644 @applepie972 @mayo0ma @smoochesfromlevi @ csmbrainrot @intoanothermind @junieloonie @yourlocalgoose @swthrxrry @lovefooi @dailybrekker @taeriffic @xxemmarldxx @alastorswife63 @butterfliesinthenightsky @mukeovernetflix @wonuskie @mysingularitybts @sorasolarium @chaitea-69 @wishyouwere-sober @mchlist @bibi-bieber-winchester @prowkarma @loveyluv7 @hhighkey @jesssssmaybankk @threadofdestiny @hinata7346 @thevampiricprincess @wreckmyimage @prettyinsatiable @fairygirl18 @idcalol @bangtannie7 @carav4l @kookie-doughs @bluesiebirdie @endeaz @q8852p @addisonwilkins1 @louweasleymalfoy @alelovesmitski @fnlyroe @swthxrry @jamieeboulos @scarletrosesposts @jesssssmaybankk @vonpeachy @sincerely-aaronette @tsubaki3192
author's note: i also wanted to pop in and say that i'm not opposed to writing more fics/oneshots of this character and in this universe (hereafter referred to as md!reader) with zoro <3 if you guys have any requests pop them in my box when my requests are open, plus i may write some on my own time too!
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ineffable-suffering · 6 months
Text
The Jane Austen Ball and why it was never about Nina and Maggie
Otherwise known as (*takes a deep breath*): A completely inflated close-up look at various dialogues and events of Season 2 that prove that the Whickber Street Traders and Shopkeeper's Association Meeting Cotillion Ball was supposed to be Aziraphale's confession to Crowley
Look, the point's been made before but that's never kept me from making it myself again, still. In fact, even I made it before, at the end of one of my other metas. But I feel like it's absolutely worthy enough to get its own soppy, way-too-long post. And I do love it so very much to write ridiculously long essays on something that could easily be condensed into a short paragraph.
So, here we go! Snuggle up, get cozy, settle in and, most importantly:
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(Word count: 3.177 | Reading time: ~13 minutes)
As I already said above, I laid out a similar case in my meta about why Aziraphale is somewhat of an unreliable narrator. I'll try and recycle it here briefly, so I can further make my point.
When Aziraphale arrives back in London from his Edinburgh journey, he seems oddly happy and giddy for the fact that he just had a rather odd and threatening encounter with Shax. I explain in my other meta that this is because he just spent the last hours of his drive reminiscing on the thrilling and romantic magic show adventure of 1941 and also the fact that he just found out that Crowley has been replaced by Shax and no longer works for Hell.
Ergo: We have a hopelessly lovesick Principality at our hands, who's practically swooning over his serpent who saved him, his books and his magic show all those years ago.
Ergo:
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✨This✨
Realistically, Aziraphale should probably be a tad worried about the eery encounter with Shax, in which she definitely had the upper hand on him. But well, if you spend many-a hours driving across the serene countryside (Edinburgh is about an 8-hour drive from London), pondering on one of the craziest, sticky-sweet romantic adventures of your not-life life, well ... things tend to turn a little rosy around the edges. Head in the clouds and all that. Light shades of grey!
Alright, onwards: Once the angel, filled to the very brim with fond memories and butterflies, gets out of the Bentley, he's kindly met with a face full of verdant plants and a very in-character-grumpy Crowley.
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Fhwack! Way to burst the rosy bubble.
Seriously, the absolute lightning speed with which Crowley storms out to vacate the bookshop the very second Aziraphale arrives makes me giggle every time.
Let's make a first small (who am I kidding) diversion into analysing the following conversation in unnecessary detail ...
... simply because I enjoy quoting dialogue as an accurate reference in my metas. I'll also highlight certain passages I want to comment on in individual colours so I can back up my thoughts with them below. Alright, their little chinwag goes as follows:
Crowley: "They you are! I was worried something might have happened to you." Aziraphale: "No, nothing happened to me. Very uneventful journey indeed. No strange things at all." Crowley: "Good. That's what we wanna hear." Aziraphale: "Um .. everything okay with- ah.." *nods to the bookshop* Crowley: "Oh, yeah, fine. He's singing to himself. I think he must have been asleep. I heard snoring coming from his bedroom–" Crowley, to the Bentley: "Did you miss me? I bet you did." Aziraphale: "... I'm sure it did." Crowley: "So, any more clues from the mystery of the missing archangel?" Aziraphale: "Not exactly. Or, if there are, I haven't yet cracked the case. But I'm certainly hot on the trail of something." Crowley: "I'm sure you are. Oh, by the way, the whole sudden rain and awning thing was a complete washout." Aziraphale: "Sorry?" Crowley: "You know, project making Nina fall in love with Maggie. I failed, it's your go." Aziraphale: "I see. Well then, Whickber Street Traders and Shopkeeper's Association Monthly Meeting, here we come!" Crowley: "You're really hosting the meeting?" Aziraphale: "Absolutely! And I can guarantee you, it will be a night to remember."
At first glance, this has little to do with the plot of this meta but actually, it folds into my point very nicely! However, it's not time for that yet, so we'll just state the facts as they are for now and then bring them back 'round later when we need them. That being said: For the love of Someone, will these two ever manage to simply tell each other the truth of what happened instead of thinking they can protect each other by lying about it all the time? Hrmpf. As a big fan of open communication myself, I'm close to developing a stomach ulcer with the amount of false truths being spewed here. (Then again – and yes, that is another, way larger meta I'm currently cooking up – it plays so very perfectly into the whole Jane-Austen-Pride-and-Prejudice tragic miscommunication theme that this entire Season has, so I understand the point of it.)
Very uneventful journey indeed, Aziraphale, except for the fact that you were ambushed by a demon who told you she was Crowley's successor, knows about the rumors of the two of you being an item as well as what went down in 1941 (that almost had both of you exposed) and also seems to have figured out where you and your demon boyfriend are hiding Gabriel, all in the span of about a minute. No strange things at all, nooo!
And Crowley's "Oh yeah, fine" is a total lie too. Again, we see him make an absolute run for it before Aziraphale can even enter the bookshop. After all, he just once again witnessed Jim have a Gabriel-flashback, speaking of the Second Coming, while Crowley was alone with him. As fumingly angry he is with the amnesiac archangel – he's also absolutely terrified of what might happen (to him and Aziraphale) should Jim regain his memories. So, no wonder he's quick to vacate the premises after witnessing Jim's rather eery memory flashback (and was, just like Aziraphale, threatened by Shax mere moments later, lol).
But no, nothing out of the ordinary happened to either of them. Tip-top. Absolutely tickety-fucking-boo.
Alright, let's get back on track with the actual topic of this meta. Certainly hot on the trail of something, hm? At first glance, it might seem like Aziraphale is talking about the fact that Gabriel was in company of someone whenever he went to the Resurrectionist Pub. (The clue!) However, I don't actually think he is talking about that. Why? Because, and this slipped my mind too at first, he never actually follows any of this information up, does he? Yes, sure, he went to Edinburgh, found the capital-c Clue and then returned to London. But what does he do with it? Nothing. He doesn't keep investigating this hot trail because that's not the important thing he realized during his journey. No, the more important clue Aziraphale found during his trip, is that Crowley no longer works for Hell and that he is also very much irrevocably in love with him and must confess this at the earliest given chance. (The latter part isn't necessarily a new discovery for Aziraphale, but it surely is fuelled by the fact that he just realized Crowley's out of a Hellish job and simply hasn't told him yet.)
This exchange just the perfect indicator for the fact that Aziraphale, at no point during his drive back, was thinking about the Maggie and Nina mission. He has no idea what Crowley is talking about once he mentions it and seems surprised, even, that he would. Even though they just talked about it on the phone when Aziraphale was still at the graveyard. Which is another important piece of evidence because it means that the last status update Aziraphale got of Mission Lovebirds, was that Crowley had sensed an opportunity to make them fall in love – and had then hung up on him. Why is this important? Because it means that until that very point of their conversation, Aziraphale did not know that Crowley's attempt had failed! There would have been just as much of a chance of Crowley's weather miracle actually working out and Maggie and Nina already having skipped into the sunset happily ever after.
So, riddle me this:
Why would Aziraphale spend the entire ride back from Edinburgh plotting "a night to remember" (because clearly, he already had the entire Ball planned out down to a T in his head since he goes into action right away after arriving) if he didn't even know yet that Crowley's attempt had failed?
To be very clear here: We're not talking about Aziraphale driving on the M1 to London, having a silly little idea for putting on some good music, miracle-ing Nina and Maggie to dance to it and watch them confess their love–
No.
He planned an entire actual Cotillion Ball with very particular location design that involves re-arranging the entire bookshop, specifically designed individual outfits for (almost) every single attendee, topped off with a live band, hors-d'œuvre, drinks and an actual choreographed group dance.
During one car ride.
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Where's the party planner Aziraphale AU? I'm waiting!
Now, sure, we know that it's still quite important for Aziraphale to convince Heaven of the faux-reason they gave for their accidental ✨25-Lazarii miracle✨. But if we're all honest, this all seems to be a tad much just to make two random humans fall in love, even for that.
Glittery ball gowns and suits? Red and gold wall curtains? A modified language filter? Bloody vol-au-vents?
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Talk about over the top ...
Once we start S2E5, Crowley is still surprised at the mere fact that Aziraphale is actually planning to organize the Monthly Meeting – and he doesn't even know yet that it's gonna be the most extravagant ball-boogaloo that the Whickber Street Community has ever seen! Aziraphale wanting to organize the meeting alone, is enough to render Crowley incredulous, because Aziraphale never mingles with the other shopkeepers. He usually actively avoids them and any sort of social encounters as much as he can because he doesn't care about the bloody Christmas lights, alright?
These things seem mundane and uninteresting to him, obviously, since all he really cares about is hoarding his book collection in peace like the little hedonist he is and drawing as little attention as possible to his none-business business.
Oh, right, speaking of books:
Let's take another unnecessarily detailed look at the whole Whickber Street invitation scene:
Aziraphale realizes very quickly that he's not the only one who's quite unenthusiastic about the blessed Chritsmas lights. And despite his very persuasive methods of temptation ...
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... he has to take some more drastic measurements. And those are?
That's right: Giving away his books.
I'll repeat it again, slowly: Aziraphale is willingly (!) giving away or lending his books to pretty much complete strangers to, allegedly, make two other humans strangers fall in love.
Seriously, who is that angel and what has he done with our prim, fussy, hedonistic Aziraphale that protects his books with the vice grip of an eagle carrying his precious prey?
Believe in the importance of Mission Lovebirds as much as you will, but we're talking about Mr. A.Z. Fell here who, over the past millennia, has pretty much spent every day actively working out methods to stop people from purchasing as much as a single paperback from his holy shelves.
And yet: the 1965 September Dr. Who Annual? Given away. The first edition of Expert at the Card Table that was S. W. Erdnase's personal copy? Lent away to grubby human hands to fondle around with.
Let's do another coloured dialogue diversion (don't worry, it's not as extensive as the last one):
Crowley: "You just did what I think you did?" Aziraphale: "I'm not prepared to talk about it." Crowley: "You gave away a book." Aziraphale: "I had to! Maggie and Nina are depending on me. They just don't know it yet."
Crowley backs up my point: This is a huge deal. Aziraphale does not sell his books – let alone give them away for free. We're all shocked! Flabbergasted!
And the explanation Crowley and us get just ... doesn't satisfy. Something and someone sure is depending on this Ball and doesn't know it yet. But it's most definitely not Maggie and Nina, folks.
You know for whom Aziraphale would give away his books in the blink of an eye, though?
Mhm, that's right.
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This pretty old serpent.
I want to take a minute to show you the reaction again that Aziraphale has upon entering the very same magic shop him and Crowley went to in 1941 to acquire the Bullet Catch:
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You ... you need a minute there, angel? You're sure looking a little ... affected.
And I mean, well, no wonder. He reminisced about that very memory four hours last night. To him, this shop is where the most turbulent, ecstatic, adrenaline-fuelled and romantic night of his life began. And it shows.
I've made my point in my other meta series about how Aziraphale is an incredibly nostalgic character. He romanticizes so many things in his memories – especially the parts that feature Crowley. So, it doesn't surprise me in the slightest that he's once again willing to loosen the tight grip he has on his book collection to get the successor of Will Goldstone's Magic Shop, the shop that started it all for him, to come to his fancy Ball.
As we watch Aziraphale and his little lap dog demon pat around Soho, I'd like to take another second to point out that he goes to seven or more establishments before he even invites Nina.
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... and he only does so because she starts talking to them on the street. Almost like he'd forgotten about it. Why not ask her at the very beginning? To establish whether or not he'd have to book-blackmail her too?
"Perfectly ordinary invitation with no hidden agenda of any kind", except that he's using you and Maggie as a pretence to resolve his own clusterfuck of a relationship-miscommunication Jane-Austen-style so that he can then hopefully confess his undying love to his demon not-boyfriend boyfriend.
Marvellous!
You'll forgive me another short diversion but my God, the whole exchange at the Marguerite's restaurant with Crowley literally cat-call-whistling Aziraphale over to him (and Aziraphale checking if he meant someone else first, I–)? I am weak. So, so weak and
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However, this is also when we get a snippet of Crowley finally revealing the truth in place of his "Oh, he's fine"-lie earlier and telling Aziraphale that he's actually pretty scared Jim might turn back into Gabriel and smite him altogether. And Aziraphale's response is, in a cosmic sense, (remember the pink paragraph now) so hilarious:
"Have you thought of just talking to him?"
Yeah, have you? Have any of the two of you? Just thought about talking? To each other? About anything?
'pparently not. But hey, it's all good because remember what the ultimate remedy for star-crossed lovers simply misunderstanding each other is?
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Bish, bash, bosh, problem solved!
Back at the ballroom bookshop, Aziraphale sends Crowley to invite Maggie in order to, in my opinion, not spoil the Ball-y surprise for him. (Inviting Maggie only now?! Wouldn't she be one of the only two guests who really should attend? Why the short notice? If she's really that important for the Ball you're planning, hm?)
On top of this, we see Nina almost not attending the Ball meeting after her partner broke up with her and Crowley being the one who coincidentally runs into her and ushers her into the bookshop before Shax and her "legion" of demons start creeping up on them. Again, if this hadn't happened by pure coincidence, Nina would have left to go home and this whole Ball would have taken place without her, rendering the apparent sole purpose of making her fall in love with Maggie useless.
Why doesn't Aziraphale care more for both of them to attend and be there? Why is he instead busy fussing over everything looking perfect and wonderful and doesn't even seem to notice that both Nina and Maggie are really late to the meeting?
Well. Well.
The answer's in the title, babes.
Alas, Crowley safely gets Maggie and Nina to join them, Mr. Brown is the only one who doesn't get a miracled outfit (fussy, petty angel, you just don't like him, do you?), Jimbriel stuns with glamour and flirt (and whatever sexually suggestive thing he does with his cheeks) and the Whickber Street Ball is a-go!
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Sorry, I just had to chuck this in again because Crowley's face here absolutely kills me every time. He looks so confused, I am hollering.
And the heart eyes Aziraphale is making at Nina and Maggie now that they're actually here?
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Oh, bless it, angel.
He's all like "Oh look, it's working! Jane was right! It's all going to be resolved, all the misunderstanding and quarrels! Crowley, where's Crowley–"
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Ah yes, there he is.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is an angel who is not listening to a single word being said right now. No, in his head, Aziraphale is already down on one knee, pouring his heart out to Crowley after they just danced the night away.
Oh, yes, right. The dancing.
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Parallel much?
But well, as marvellous and beautifully romantic as her stories tend to be, it turns out that Jane Austen isn't always right after all. Because before we know it, the perfect night shatters into many-a tiny pieces (literally).
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And once again, fhwack:
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... the rosy bubble bursts.
Let's take one more deep breath so I can make my final point:
In S2E2, Aziraphale explains to us very exactly what Jane's Balls (hrhr) used to be about: Solving miscommunication and confessing love to one another.
During his car journey back from Edinburgh, Aziraphale:
doesn't know Crowley's Mission Lovebirds had failed
remembers 1941 and just how badly he's in love with Crowley
and also realizes that they seem to have been wildly miscommunicating for quite some time now. (Crowley didn't even tell him he basically got let go!)
So, what does maddeningly strong love plus a want to resolve all the miscommunication equal? That's right: A night to remember! A Ball to change it all! A dance, a vol-au-vent, a confession. And, ideally, a happy ever after. Because:
“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man angel in possession of a good fortune Jane Austen collection, must be in want of a wife demon husband.”
The Ball was never for Nina and Maggie. As a byproduct, maybe, yes. But the whole rest of the glimmer and glamour, the careful, romantic planning and set up of it all, the book-bating the other shopkeepers– that was for Crowley and Crowley only.
And oh, if only it were as easy as in the books.
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*whispers* I'm sorry, I had to.
***
Your honour, the tinfoil-hat crackpot defence rests. Feel free to share thoughts (and prayers) if you want to!
Au revoir! 💗
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halsteadlover · 5 months
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𝐊𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐭, 𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲
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*Gifs and pic not mine credits to the owner*
• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Fem!Reader.
• Requested by anon: Hi i saw your post 'exam buddies' and it gave me and idea of Jay gets grazed by a bullet or something and while he's getting checked out he is flirting with the doctor who he has had a crush on for a while and she does to so she denies him and says how unprofessional it would be but while she is talking he walks closer to her and starts undressing her while teasing her and saying "yes so unprofessional" of not that's fine love your work.
• Warnings: curse words, making out (hehe), mention of wounds, and I don’t know what else let me know if I missed any lol.
• Word count: 3604.
• A/N: when he gets stabbed just to see you 😍😍😍. Need me a man like Jay frfr. I hope you’ll like this one I really had fun writing it. Comment, reblog and leave a like if you want, it’d mean the world. Thank you so much for your support sending lots of love to all of you xx
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“Halstead, third time in a month, that’s a record even for you.”
An amused expression appeared on your face as you entered the room of the patient you were supposed to see, who turned out to be no one other than Jay Halstead. He was lying on the bed, his back resting on the raised headboard and a bored expression on his face which however disappeared as soon as he saw you enter.
“Oh yeah I couldn't wait to see you, Dr. Sunshine,” he replied, letting his eyes wander unscrupulously along your uniform-covered figure, before returning them to your face and giving you a full on smile.
This was a nickname Jay had given you since the first moment you met and since then he had never stopped calling you that. In fact, since that day he had noticed how you always had a smile on your lips, constantly, how nothing seemed to disturb you. You always had a happy and serene expression on your face and this was one of the things that most attracted him from the beginning.
The two of you had met some time ago when Jay had arrived at Med's to question a suspect who he had injured during a chase and who you had taken into care.
He remembered how impressed he was with you when he first saw you, he couldn't deny you were a beautiful woman. But it was the marked humor with which you addressed him and your sharp but nice jokes that truly mesmerized him. While you two talked in front of that helpless patient who did nothing but bring his eyes between you and the detective, Jay found himself being attracted more and more to you, feeling the ever-increasing desire to get to know you better.
After that exchange in front of the patient, you left Jay talking to the suspect and walked out of the room, winking at him before closing the door behind you and leaving Jay standing there looking like an idiot.
Needless to say, as soon as he finished questioning the suspect, he immediately turned to his brother with the aim of asking for information about you. He didn't know why but he wanted to know everything he could about you. He had looked for you so he could have the opportunity to talk to you again but you were already with another patient.
From that day you had never left Jay's mind or his thoughts.
He found himself going to Med's every time for all sorts of reasons, most of which involved having to say something to his brother who couldn't help but make fun of the detective. You obviously weren't stupid and there was no shortage of your comments regarding the fact there was a very different reason behind those visits to which Jay responded with some mischievous joke that made you blush from head to toe.
However, there was no shortage of visits either due to some injuries Jay got due to his job but that didn't stop him from shamelessly flirting with you even if he was on a hospital bed.
He loved this relationship that had been created between you, the flirting, teasing each other, and every opportunity was perfect to see you but he wanted more. He struggled to admit it to himself but he had a huge crush on you and the fact he couldn't read you and know what you were thinking was driving him crazy. He was getting tired of looking at you from afar, of hiding behind the flirty jokes, he wanted you.
You giggled and looked at him for a moment as you quickly examined his body for injuries. Or at least that's what you convinced yourself of. You were pretty good at hiding your feelings because to say that damn detective gave you goosebumps and set every cell in your body on fire was an understatement.
You sanitized your hands and put on a pair of clean gloves before approaching him, his eyes never leaving yours and just the way he looked at you made you shiver from head to toe and your knees tremble.
Focus Y/n, he’s a patient now.
“What did you do this time?” You asked and he rolled his eyes playfully.
“You're no fun dammit, always straight to the point.”
“You know me Halstead,” you replied. “So?”.
He shrugged nonchalantly. “Just a little cut while chasing a suspect, no big deal.”
Your gaze fell on his abdomen, at the level of his left side where you noticed a copious stain of blood. “Well let me be the judge since I’m the doctor. Lift your shirt up.”
His lips lifted into a mischievous grin and you rolled your eyes knowing where his mind had immediately gone. “If you want to undress me just say so Dr. Sunshine, there's no need for these excuses.”
He took off his shirt and you tried with every fiber of your being to try to maintain a composed and professional expression, trying not to look his abs and not to focus on the heat that was spreading through your body.
You swallowed the lump in your throat but you couldn't help but admire that Greek God laying in front of you. “You didn't need to take off your shirt Halstead.” You said in an amused tone before pulling up a chair and sitting next to the bed.
“Well, you know I'm a self-centered bastard,” he retorted and you rolled your eyes again as you began to examine the wound. “Plus I love the way you’re struggling not to jump on me right now.”
You flicked your gaze into his eyes, not responding but maintaining eye contact as he looked at you as if he wanted to undress you right then and there. The heat spreading through your body intensified and rose to your cheeks and you struggled to say anything because, damn, he was just telling the truth.
“J-just, let me do my job Halstead,” you murmured and cursed yourself for the way you stuttered. You looked away and back to his wound and he chuckled, probably aware of the effect it had on you.
You examined his wound. It was a stab wound and luckily it wasn't very deep so it only required a bit of disinfection and a couple of stitches. You took what you needed and sat next to Jay again, who continued to watch and examine your movements with meticulous attention.
“I'll numb the area so I can stitch you,” you said in a firm, professional tone of voice but refusing to look at him. You couldn't do it, not when his eyes were enough to make you a babbling mess.
You tried to maintain all the concentration you possessed, failing miserably as Jay was laying there in front of you with his shirt off.
You couldn't help but let your gaze travel down his abdomen, along his hips, the V-line disappearing into his boxers you so much wanted to trace with your tongue, the line of his underwear that slightly protruded from his pants.
He was so fucking hot and you were about to be burned.
Your breathing quickened even though you tried to keep yourself composed but this didn't escape Jay, who didn't take his eyes off you for even a second.
He carefully scanned your profile and features, the way your eyelids and eyelashes fluttered, the way your cheeks were flushed and he knew it was because of him, the way you were trying to avoid him even if you were attracted to him like a magnet.
“You're so beautiful Y/n, you know that?” he murmured before he could stop himself.
You almost dropped the pliers you were holding, taken aback by his words. You giggled, keeping your expression as neutral as possible even though that short and simple phrase had thrown you into a whirlwind of overwhelming emotions and sensations.
“And you know I’m your doctor right?”.
“Mmh just for now,” he replied “As soon as you're done you won't be anymore.”
“You're actually one of my most loyal patients.” You gave him an amused look, a smirk on your lips as you continued to stitch his wound. “Like I said, you're breaking every record so no, you can't make those comments it's very unethical of you.”
There was nothing ethical about Jay's sinful thoughts about you, but he didn't let them out at the time.
He laughed, never taking his eyes off you. “Since we see each other so often we’re more than just doctor/patient now, I’d say I have every right to tell you’re beautiful.”
“Stop it.” You gave him a fake disappointed look even if you were internally giggling like a little girl. “Am I hurting you? You feel anything?” You also asked but the smug expression on his face and the smirk on his lips had given you the answer you needed.
He shook his head. “Come to a date with me.”
Your heart started beating wildly, more than it already was since the first moment you say Jay laying on that bed. “Is this a question or an order?”.
“You want to tell me no?”.
“Jay, I need to focus.”
“That's not a no though, so I have some hope.”
You laughed, at the tenacity and cheekiness he was showing and to mask the nervousness you were feeling, God, you didn't know how long you could last before giving in.
After about ten minutes you finished suturing his wound and placed gauze over it, recommending him to disinfect it and change the gauze at least twice a day even though he did nothing but flirt with you.
You stood up and removed your gloves before throwing them into the bin along with the dirty gauze you had used earlier and disinfected your hands.
You glanced at Jay, noticing he had sat up in bed, still wonderfully bare-chested. For the second time you found yourself running your eyes over his frame, his broad shoulders, his muscular arms and toned chest.
That man oozed sex from every pore of his body and you no longer knew what to do to resist him.
“Why are you this far? I don't bite, you know.” He said with a wicked smile on his lips, not even trying to mask the way he was eye-fucking you.
You rolled your eyes for the thousand time and crossed your arms over your chest, remaining firm in your position even if with difficulty. You felt as if there was some kind of force pushing you towards him and as the minutes passed you were less and less able to fight it.
“Don't you have to go back to work?”.
“Not until you give me an answer.”
“About what?”.
“About the date.”
“You didn’t ask me though.”
“Well will come to a date with me?”.
You tried to suppress a chuckle but didn't answer, keep losing yourself in those two emeralds that were his eyes.
You didn't have to hesitate like that, you didn't even have to think about it. You were a doctor, he was your patient and there was nothing more immoral.
But then why didn't you say no? Why were you actually thinking about that?
Jay stood up and walked over you noticing your silence, standing a step away from you.
Still shirtless.
God please have some mercy on me.
You raised your head slightly so you could look in his eyes given your height difference, the words dying in your throat every time you tried to say something.
It was undeniable there was an attraction between you two that in one way or another always pushed you towards each other. It was undeniable that man made you feel things you hadn't felt in a long time.
You didn't know what he had done to you, what kind of witchcraft he had practiced on you since there had never even been anything between you. Sure, you flirted with him too, he shamelessly hit on you and sometimes you didn't even know if he was serious or just because of the way your relationship had turned, but you couldn't get him out of your mind.
“You're thinking about it, aren't you? I know you want it,” he whispered, lifting a hand and stroking your hair, moving a strand behind your ear as his eyes continued to admire and analyze every little feature of your face.
You let your arms drop to your sides, dumbfounded as his fingers caressed your skin so lightly his touch seemed unnoticeable. But you felt it all, you felt his touch in every corner of your body.
Your breathing quickened as your eyes alternated between his and his mouth, without even being able to stop yourself.
“We can't,” you whispered back.
“Why not? We both want it, I know it and you know it too.” He wet his lips with his tongue. “And the way you're looking at me now, fuck… I'm fighting every fiber of my body not to throw you on this bed and have my way with you. You can't deny it Y/n, you can’t deny what's going on between us.”
Before you knew it, your hands were resting on his chest, his skin hot under your fingers and his breathing visibly quickening under your touch. “And who tells me it's not just the thrill of conquest? That once I say yes you won't just disappear?”.
His hands cupped your face, his lips so close to yours they kept brushing each other. “I’m planning to do so many things to you that a lifetime won't be enough Y/n, you're not just a conquest. I want you.”
His thumb traced the outline of your bottom lip and your breath hitched, almost making you pass out at his feet.
God Jay what are you doing to me?
“You really think every time I'm here it's to see Will? Don't get me wrong, I love my brother but do you seriously think I'm here almost every day just to see him? Do you seriously think I would randomly find myself at Molly's every night whenever you're there? Do you think I’d let myself get stabbed just to have another excuse to come here and see you?”.
You pulled away from him, hitting him in the chest in disbelief. “Are you out of your goddamn mind?! I hope you're kidding.”
“Do you see me laughing? I'm not fucking kidding. I could’ve easily overpower that piece of shit but you got into my head so much that at that moment I just thought I had the perfect excuse to see you and be close to you. That's how fucking insane you make me Y/n. Please just give me a chance, I want you so bad,” he spoke, not caring about how desperate he sounded.
Now that he had said it out loud he realized how crazy he really was. But did he care? Absolutely not. He just wanted you to accept to go to that date.
“And it's not just wanting to have sex with you. I mean, God yes, you turn me one so much I would fuck you on every floor and surface of this hospital… But I want everything, I want to know every single part of you, the good and the bad, I want you to be mine, I want you to know me and I want to be yours.”
You sighed in frustration, the temperature of the room rising a degree with each passing second. How were you supposed to push him away?
“Tell me you don't want me and I'm leaving right now and you'll never hear from me again. Tell me you don't feel like this thing between us is consuming you too... Tell me,” he continued, brushing his nose with yours.
“You're so unprofessional Jay,” you whispered, trying so hard to fight the urge to give in but, fuck, you didn't think it would be this hard.
“Yeah so unprofessional. Now answer me.”
You sighed. “Jay I…”
“God you're so stubborn Dr. Sunshine, you really want to torture me until the end? Have mercy on me at least now that I'm… Shit,” he stopped, holding his side where he had been stabbed and letting out a cry of pain.
“Jay! Hey, what's going on? Talk to me please.”
“Fuck it hurts.”
“Here, let me help you. Sit down so I can take another look at you. Everything will be fine.”
You helped him sit on the edge of the bed, worried and thinking of every possible scenario imaginable like an internal bleeding.
But when he instead surrounded your hips under your white coat and pulled you towards him, making you settle between his legs, you understood that asshole was just faking it.
“You piece of shit! You've got me worried sick!” You exclaimed, hitting his shoulder harder this time. You tried to pull away from him but his grip was too tight around your waist.
He laughed, a cocky look on his face that only made you want to punch him. “Look at you so worried about me. Just as I thought.”
“You thought about what? That you’re an asshole?”.
“Yes I am,” he replied amused, “But also that all this facade you want to put up, all this resistance is fake. That you want me as much as I want you, so why do you keep fighting it so much?”.
“Because it’s unprofessional, I'm a doctor and you're my patient. We can't.”
“Of course we can.” His hands tightened around your waist, moving up your hips, distracting you and making you forget what you even wanted to say. “Like I said. Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t want me.”
You didn't answer, again.
You just looked at him and melted under his touch.
You didn't know what happened, it was like a switch had been turned on inside you.
All your rational thoughts and abilities left your mind as you grabbed his face and crashed your lips onto his.
You didn't want to resist anymore, especially since you weren’t strong enough. Let's be honest, it was a battle you already lost from the start.
You didn't want to live in fear of what might happen, hide behind the hypocrisy of 'unprofessionalism' because the truth was that you wanted that man more than anyone you had ever met in your life. The truth was, you couldn't look him in the eyes and tell him you didn't want him when just hearing his name made your heart beat wildly and your body lit up on fire.
Jay kissed you back, not even being able to explain how ardently and for how long he wanted that moment.
You parted your lips slightly and he immediately took the opportunity to slip his tongue in your mouth, deepening the kiss which was becoming more and more passionate, borderline pornographic.
His hands rested on your stomach and moved up your abdomen, grazing your breasts before settling on your shoulders. He hesitated and you nodded during the kiss, giving him permission to take off your white coat which fell to the floor next to your feet.
His hands then trailed down back to your ass which he squeezed and groped without any shame as you threaded your fingers through his hair, sighing into his mouth at the sensation.
If at first there was a thread of doubt that left you perplexed, after finally feeling his lips against yours, their taste, you knew there would never be a return from that point. You were deeply and inexorably lost for Jay Halstead.
Your heart was pounding as your body continued to press against his, as if you were both trying to suck out each other's souls.
You bit his lower lip and a small moan escaped him which immediately made you press your legs to each other, your insides twist and goosebumps on your skin. He slapped your ass in response, a gesture that turned you on more than you would ever admit.
“Fuck,” you whimpered, pulling him towards you.
“I'll take this as a yes?” He whispered the moment you both broke apart panting as you tried to catch your breath.
He slid his hands down your back, up your ass, your thighs, touching and caressing every inch of your body he could reach.
“What do you think?” You replied, one eyebrow raised.
“I can't even think right now to be honest, all the blood has rushed to my dick. It actually hurts a little, can you kiss it better?”.
“You’d really love it wouldn’t you?”.
“Oh you have no idea how many times I’ve imagined you kissing me better, especially my dick. This mouth of yours is haunting me princess.”
You chuckled – not mentioning how bad you wanted to do it – and he smiled back, feeling lighter, happier.
“Is tomorrow night okay?”.
“Tomorrow night? Are you kidding me? You really think I can last until tomorrow especially after you kissed me like that? No, there’s no chance. I want to see you tonight.”
“Oh Halstead, remember that patience is the virtue of the strong,” You smirked at him, caressing his shoulders. “See you tomorrow night detective.”
You gave him one last sweet kiss on the lips and picked up your white coat from the floor, then straightening out your wrinkled uniform. You winked at him before exiting the room, leaving him sitting on the edge of that bed with an erection in his pants he knew he’d struggle to keep at bay for the next twenty-four hours.
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avatar-anna · 3 months
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Assistant! Reader x Harry Styles Masterlist
April 2016
“Thank you for meeting me.”
Y/n settled into the seat across from Harry. Her hands curled tightly around her mug, apprehension seeping into her bones. “Of course.”
She had been surprised when Harry called her, asking to meet at the Beachwood Cafe. She hadn’t heard from him in months, not one call or text, not even an email. Not that Y/n really expected much when One Direction finally went on hiatus, but after zero communication, she wasn’t quite sure why he’d called her all these months later. 
“How are you? I haven’t seen you in ages,” Harry asked.
Y/n’s eyebrows raised a bit, but she answered him anyway after taking a sip of her coffee. “Fine, I guess. You?”
“Good!” Harry said excitedly. “Taking a break the last few months has been…I don’t know. Peaceful, but odd, you know? I’ve never had so much time to myself before.”
“Must be nice,” Y/n said, trying to hide the irritation in her voice.
“Yeah, but I realized that I kind of miss it,” he said. “I knew once we decided on the hiatus that I wanted to do my own thing, but I thought I would take a longer break, but I feel like I’m…itching to get back to work.”
That definitely seemed like Harry. Y/n had worked for him for years, and even when there were breaks between tours, he was hard at work—writing, going to Fashion Week, collaborating with other artists, vocal training, even trying new recipes in his state-of-the-art kitchen, which led to a phone call at one in the morning where Harry asked Y/n to come over and see if his macrons tasted "fluffy enough." It seemed only right that he rested for mere months before starting a new project. She could practically picture him at either of his homes in LA or London, scribbling in his leatherbound journal or playing new melodies on his guitar or piano (and the occasional late-night pastry party). As long as she’d known him, Harry had been a hard worker through and through. A little on the wild side when he had some tequila in him, but when it came down to his career, he was focused, determined. 
“Good for you,” Y/n said, meaning it. She always thought he was capable of more. “So what comes next for you? Have you recorded songs already?”
“Not quite. I’m planning a trip to Jamaica to write and record there. It’s remote, serene, a good place to get away. So we’ll have to start booking flights and places to stay and—”
“I’m sorry, ‘We?’” Y/n asked, her brow furrowing with confusion. 
Harry matched her look of confusion with one of his own. “Yeah, I mean—I need you. I can’t do this without you.”
The sentiment warmed Y/n’s heart for a moment, but his immediate assumption that she would drop everything just because he asked her to brought the irritation swarming back. “Mr. Sty—Harry, you know I don’t work for you anymore, right?”
“What do you mean? Are you talking about the hiatus? I just thought we could all use some time off, but…I guess I just thought—”
Harry didn’t finish his thought, but his cheeks were flushed with embarrassment. Y/n would’ve found it cute if he hadn’t been so dense. Resentment still circled around her like a fog, and she wouldn’t let it go so easily, she couldn’t. 
“I was employed by your management, Harry. To be an assistant to a member of One Direction,” Y/n explained. “I was let go. I had to quickly find another job doing something else.”
“Oh.”
Y/n supposed she should’ve anticipated being fired, but she didn’t. There was a lot of information that she was privy to that most people weren’t, secrets that were tightly bound by an NDA when she was first hired, but talks of the hiatus was very hushed. She knew to suspect that somewhere down the line the boys would finally take a break, but it came a lot sooner than she was prepared for, and she was left jobless before she had the chance to line something else up. Y/n thought that Harry would give her the courtesy of a warning, but he said nothing about it to her, didn’t offer much except a side hug after One Direction’s last performance.
So yeah, she was a little bitter.
“I’m—I’m really sorry, Y/n. I know it doesn’t make up for…all of this and everything you went through, but I am truly sorry.”
“Thank you.” 
Y/n believed him, believed that he was sorry for everything that went down, but it still hurt to know she wasn’t someone he was close enough to talk to about all of this at the time. She was Harry’s assistant, she knew that, but they’d been through a lot together. But he was ever the professional it seemed, and it was her job to remember that, not his.
When she realized her coffee was finished, Y/n stood up. “Well, it was good seeing you, Harry. Good luck on your next project. I’m sure it’ll be great.”
“Wait, but—you’re not—you‘re leaving?”
“I have to run a couple errands before work," Y/n explained. She rested her hand on his shoulder and squeezed gently. “But really, no hard feelings. I wish you all the best.”
She left Harry at the table, heading for the front of the cafe and toward the busy street beyond. Her heart felt heavy as she walked away, but she tried to shake the feeling that she was walking away from more than just her boss. Former boss. Like her mother always reminded her, she couldn’t be a personal assistant forever.
“Wait!”
Y/n turned on instinct, eyes widening as Harry jogged after her, his little bun bouncing with each step. He skidded to a stop in front of her, green eyes wide and searching. For what, she wasn’t sure, but the heat of his gaze was enough to make butterflies stir in her stomach.
Putting on her best front, she raised her eyebrows, waiting for Harry to say whatever he needed to.
“I wasn’t kidding earlier. I need you, Y/n,” he said. “I—You’re the only one who really knows me, who I know will have my back no matter what. I need a familiar face in my corner.”
I need you, Y/n. Those words were her kryptonite. Year after year, Y/n heard Harry's voice over the phone as he roused her from sleep, read the text messages while she was getting her nails done or watched TV in her hotel room, or on the rare occasion she went on a date. But she had to hold strong. Y/n had been devastated by her sudden layoff, but now she had a life, and she didn't want to get sucked back into Harry's very alluring web of charming smiles, cheesy jokes, and endless adventure. That was his life, not hers.
“I have a job, Harry. I can’t just drop everything and quit because you suddenly want me to—”
“What are they paying you?”
Y/n’s brows furrowed. “Excuse me?”
Harry pushed on. “What are they paying you? I’ll double it.”
Scoffing in disbelief, she said, “It’s not about the money—”
“Triple,” he countered. Harry took her hand in his and squeezed it. He looks desperate, Y/n thought.
“I can’t just quit my job because you remembered I existed,” Y/n said quietly, pulling her hand out of his. She clung to her resolve, hoping Harry would make this easy and just let it go, let her go. “I—I deserve more.”
More of what, she wasn’t sure, but Y/n knew it was true. Harry only reached out because he needed something from her, and that hurt more than she cared to admit. 
“You’re right. I’m sorry,” Harry said, looking down at his shoes. A pair of scuffed Chelsea boots he wore practically everywhere. Y/n had bought him a pair of Vans one year, an attempt to switch up his wardrobe, but he still chose the boots nine times out of ten. “Just—At least think about coming to Jamaica. Please?”
“Harry—”
“Not as my assistant. As a guest. A friend,” Harry amended. “We’re planning on staying at a huge villa, and I want to make up for being an idiot. Just—Just think about it. Please.”
Despite everything, Y/n found herself wanting to say yes. It was that magnetic pull she felt toward Harry that had kept her working for him for so long. He was an important person in her life, and up until he’d all but ghosted her after the hiatus, she thought she was important to him too. In spite of his misgivings, Y/n still wanted to believe that she was. 
It was so stupid, but it felt good to be wanted by him. She was an idiot, she knew that. But her friendship with Harry was legitimate, he'd just acted like a complete idiot. She'd known him long enough to know he was very capable of acting like an idiot. So even though she shouldn’t, even though she had carefully lined up her reasons not to in a little line, she started to cave. 
But she couldn’t make the decision now. Not when Harry was looking at her with pleading green eyes and his sad little puppy dog face, his cologne dizzyingly lovely. No, she owed it to herself to really think about what she wanted. If getting sucked back into that whirlwind was worth it. Worth getting her heart properly broken when she knew he would never feel the same about her.
"I'll show up at work, you know," Harry said. "I'm not above it. You might think I am, but I'm not."
Y/n had no doubt in her mind that he would. Along with being an idiot, Harry was very stubborn, and very persistent. She had years with him to know that. Did she really need Harry Styles showing up at her place of work?
“Fine, I’ll think about it,” she finally said, trying to pretend like her heart was screaming to just agree. But her heart was an impulsive little shit that was bound to get her in trouble.
Harry’s face broke out into a wide grin, one that displayed those famous dimples and lit up his entire face. It was hard to feel like he didn't think she was the only person on earth to exist when he looked like that, like he was convinced she’d already said yes. “I’ll take it.”
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panandinpain0 · 6 months
Note
Miss Granger x female Slytherin I beg you 🙏🙏 but a nice one
Summer Lovin'
Sorry this took so long! I've got a schedule out now so I'll be doing these requests more regularly <3
Enjoy!
@@@
Requested by: Anon
Hermione Granger x Fem!Slytherin!Reader
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The fresh smell of new books would always cheer Hermione up. Not that she was in a bad mood, but it cheered her up nonetheless. Hearing the bell ring above the door was something Hermione had been longing to hear all year, the smell of a citrus scented candle wafting around the sunlit shop.
The walls had chipped brown paint on them, a warm timber color that seemed to be fading, showing the true age of the building. The wood floors had colorful rugs placed here and there, the children’s section a burst of color against the serene atmosphere. Waving to the man at the front desk, someone she’d seen there often over the years, Hermione was on her way to find a new book.
She walked slowly down the fiction aisle, her finger skimming the spines of each book. When she found one that caught her eye she pulled it off the shelf, reading the synopsis on the back.
“Looking for something exciting?” a voice asked, making Hermione flinch in surprise. She looked up at the person next to her, eyes wide. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” she laughed and held her hands up to show that she meant no harm.
“You’re fine, it’s just very quiet in here,” Hermione reassured, smiling gently at the girl in front of her. “And yes, something exciting. I’ve been reading non-fiction these last couple of months and decided to switch it up.” She waved the book in her hand around slightly.
“Hence the fiction section,” the girl commented, smiling with amusement when Hermione agreed. “That one is one of my favorites.” She gestured to the book Hermione was holding.
Hermione looked back down at the book, reexamining it. “Is it any good?”
“I’d like to think I have pretty good taste,” she replied, skimming the titles of the books on the shelf in front of her.
“Are you looking for something to read?” Hermione questioned, holding on to her book with more certainty than before.
“No, I just come here to find pretty girls to talk to,” she replied, her face completely serious.
Hermione was slightly taken aback, hesitating before asking, “Really?”
The girl’s serious face morphed into a smirk, shaking her head calmly. “No, I was being sarcastic. But that does tend to be one of the perks of this shop.”
Hermione laughed nervously in response, nodding her head before tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.
“Yes, I’m here to find a new book to read. Any suggestions?” She motioned to the shelf they were standing in front of.
Hermione turned serious as she inspected the spines, her eyes catching a specific one. As she pulled it off the shelf she asked, “How do you feel about a mystery with a romantic subplot?”
“Sounds right up my alley, if I’m being honest.”
Hermione handed her the book and they both made their way up to the counter to pay.
“You’ll have to let me know how you like the book,” the girl insisted, scribbling something down on a nearby paper. Ripping it off she handed it to Hermione. “This is my house phone, don't be surprised if my parents answer.”
“I won’t…” Hermione trailed off as she realized she didn’t know the girl’s name.
Catching the hint, the girl stuck out her hand for Hermione to shake. “(Y/N) (L/N), at your service.”
“Hermione Granger,” she returned.
“Hermione?” a voice called from outside the shop, catching both girl’s attention. Hermione’s father waved to her through the window, motioning that it was time for them to leave.
“Ah, I’ve got to go. It was a pleasure meeting you! I hope to hear how you enjoy my book as well.” Hermione smiled, cheeks pink as she said goodbye. She scolded herself as she walked away, reminding herself that she had a new friend and she shouldn’t expect anything more. Well, she had a new and very attractive friend. There’s a difference…
A Week Later…
Sniffling, Hermione gently closed the book and placed it on her lap, wiping at her tears. It had been a wonderful yet heart wrenching book, in which the main character lost the person which they loved most. She took a deep breath as she looked out of her cracked window, reflecting on what she’d read. Taking a sip of the tea that had gone cold, long forgotten after the climax of the book started, she stood up.
Hermione had been using the slip of paper (Y/N) had handed her at the bookshop as a bookmark, so as not to lose it. Now, she’d use it for its actual purpose. Gliding down the stairs, Hermione found the landline in their kitchen, dialing in the number and holding it to her ear.
As it started to ring she felt pangs of nervousness with each ring that sounded. Should she actually call her? It wasn’t a prank, was it? She didn’t think it was- they both were interested in reading and it’d be nice to have someone to talk to about it… What if she’d been making fun of Hermione the whole time and-?
“Hello?”
Clearing her throat quickly, Hermione recovered from her surprise at the voice. “Yes, hello. This is Hermione Granger, I was wondering if I could speak to (Y/N)?”
“Just a minute,” what seemed to be (Y/N)’s mother responded. Hermione heard a distant shout for her, with a “your friend’s on the phone!” after.
After another moment a different voice echoed through the phone.
“Hey, bookshop girl! Hermione, right?” (Y/N) teased through the phone, and her ease comforted Hermione from her anxieties.
“Yes, it’s Hermione. I finished the book you recommended, just now actually.”
An excited gasp could be heard, followed by a, “Did you cry? How much did you cry?”
Hermione let out a somewhat offended scoff and shook her head, even though (Y/N) couldn’t see it.
“For your information I did cry, it was a sad ending! How come you didn’t warn me?”
“What would be the fun in reading it if I’d told you how it ends?” Hermione could hear the smile in her voice.
“I suppose you’re right,” Hermione sighed back, sitting down on a stool near the counter. “Have you finished the one I gave you yet?”
“Yes, I did! You know, I always do the same thing with mystery books. I think I’ve figured out who the culprit is within three chapters and am always completely wrong by the end of the book.”
Hermione chuckled, “I also thought it was Mr. Barnabee until chapter sixteen.”
“It so should’ve been him, right? And that crazy reveal in sixteen where Gracie the mistress pulled out the handkerchief- it was exhilarating.”
“I take it you liked it?” Hermione twisted the phone cord around her finger, giving her hands something to do while they talked.
“Oh yes, I thoroughly enjoyed it. Any more recommendations? I was going to go back to the bookshop this weekend to feed my addiction.”
“Addiction?”
“Of literature.”
Hermione snorted, laughing at the response. “That’s a bit dramatic, don’t you think?” The smile in her voice was evident.
“Not at all. I can’t seem to stop and it’s draining my bank account.”
Hermione giggled again. “How about this, we can meet up and shop together?”
“Even better. I’ll be there Saturday at noon.”
“I will too.”
“Bye.”
“Bye.”
As the line clicked to signal (Y/N) had hung up, Hermione bit her lip and sighed. She stopped mid-giggling and shook her head, scolding herself again. She’d found another friend who enjoys reading just as much as she does, that doesn’t mean she can’t still scare them off. She needed to tone it down.
The summer had ended as soon as it began as the girl’s read together. They started going to each other’s houses to read, and Hermione had gotten into the habit of laying her head on (Y/N)’s lap, listening to her tell the most wondrous stories from the books.
They laughed together, cried together, damn near did everything together. None of which helped Hermione get rid of her feelings in the slightest. Little did she know, (Y/N) had started to harbor feelings for her as well, what with so much time spent with each other.
Today they were reading separately, Hermione sitting against the headboard of her bed while (Y/N) laid at the end, legs hanging off as she fingered the corner of the page. It didn’t seem like she was actually reading, but lost in thought.
Hermione’s gaze kept darting from her book to the girl in front of her, blushing every time she was almost caught.
Truth was, both the girl’s were trying to figure out how to tell the other they wouldn’t be at home for the school year. They couldn’t very well tell the other that she was a witch! Well, they could, but they didn’t know that yet.
(Y/N) shifted her position to sit up, facing Hermione and abandoning her book.
“‘Mione?”
“Hm?” Hermione set down her book, giving (Y/N) her full attention.
“I need to tell you something.”
“What is it?” She began to worry, her own problems shoved to the back of her mind.
“Summer’s almost over… I just wanted to tell you that I won’t be here when school starts back up.” (Y/N) bit her lip, picking at the skin of her nails. “I’m attending this boarding school, it’s a live-in…”
Hermione let out a somewhat relieved sigh at the admission, setting her book aside and scooting towards (Y/N) on the bed. Taking her hands in her own, Hermione smiled at her.
“I won’t either for the same reasons.” Her worry drained away as she saw (Y/N) shoulders relax and a smile appear on her face. They still wouldn’t be seeing each other until winter break or summer, but at least she wouldn’t be leaving Hermione behind. They both had reasons for not being home.
“Can I send you letters?” (Y/N) asked, playing with Hermione’s hand that rested between them. She knew it probably wouldn’t be the best idea to have a muggle sending letters to a wizarding village, or castle, without knowing, but what she didn’t know couldn’t hurt her- right?
Hermione seemed to be going through the same possibilities in her head, but ever since she’d met (Y/N), her priorities had been a bit skewed.
“Yes, you can. I’ll write down the address,” Hermione got up and scribbled on a piece of paper, handing it to (Y/N). She put it between the pages of her book immediately without looking at it, knowing she wouldn’t remember a lick of it anyways. When she sends her first letter Hermione can just look at the address she wrote from to write back.
Hermione sat back down on the bed and the two girls shared a look of understanding. They wouldn’t see each other in person for a while but that doesn’t mean this friendship had to only be for the summer.
(Y/N) reached across the bed and wrapped her arms around Hermione’s neck, pulling her into a hug. Hermione returned the gesture, arms around (Y/N)’s waist as she tucked her head into her neck. She just knew (Y/N) and the boys would get along so well if they’d ever get the chance to meet.
“I’ll miss you,” (Y/N) whispered into Hermione’s hair.
“I’ll miss you more.”
“I doubt it.”
“Don’t fight me on this, you won’t win.”
Hermione pulled (Y/N) back and they both laid on the bed, laughing together.
A Week Later…
They’d said their official goodbyes the night before hugging and holding hands until it got late enough that Hermione knew she wouldn’t want to wake up the next morning. When they parted, (Y/N) had kissed her cheek, handing Hermione a book she’d bought her as a farewell gift.
Sitting in her parents car, Hermione read the synopsis on the back of the book, smiling and flipping through the pages.
There’s no doubt Harry and Ron would hear more about (Y/N) than they’d care to, but that’s just what comes with being friends, you hear about each other’s crushes whether you like it or not. Not that Hermione would ever admit to it being a crush. Or that she’d touched the place (Y/N) had kissed on her cheek every time she thought of her…
Arriving at platform nine and three quarters, Hermione bid her parents goodbye with a hug and ran straight into the brick pillar. Coming out on the other side, Hermione took in the air, already feeling the magic thrumming through it, as if she could taste it.
Taking her bags off of the cart she had pushed them in with, she left it near the entrance and searched for her friends, specifically for the family of redheads, knowing Harry would most likely be with the Weasley’s.
Eventually she found Ron and Harry with them, and they boarded the train. Now they walked down the aisle, searching for an empty compartment, Hermione leading. Suddenly, as she was looking through the windows of one of the doors, someone ran into her. She was pushed back into Ron, who helped her stand back on two feet.
“Oh, I’m so sorry! I wasn’t looking where I was going- ‘Mione?” the extremely familiar voice gasped in shock.
Looking up, Hermione met (Y/N)’s gaze. “(Y/N)?!” Hermione asked back with just as much surprise.
“I didn’t know you were a witch,” they both said at the same time, laughing with each other after.
“Well, this makes things much easier,” (Y/N) admitted, pulling Hermione into a hug after handing her the bag that she’d dropped back.
“You two know each other?” Harry asked, gaze darting down to (Y/N)’s green and silver tie.
“We met over the summer,” Hermione filled in, also taking in (Y/N)’s uniform (but not for the same reasons). “I had no idea you went to Hogwarts,” Hermione repeated, moving out of the way as a few people passed by.
“I didn’t know you went here either! There’s an empty compartment just up here.” (Y/N) led them just two doors up and opened it, letting them all enter and following after.
“So how did you two meet?” Harry asked, looking slyly between the two as they sat across from Ron and himself.
“At this muggle bookshop, we were both looking for something to read and started spending time together,” (Y/N) explained after putting Hermione’s bag above them next to her own.
They spent the rest of the time getting to know each other, Ron still holding a bit of distaste for her house, but pushing that aside as they talked about the Chudley Cannons together. Harry had liked her from the start, well- as soon as she said she disliked Malfoy about as much as the rest of them.
Once they arrived at Hogwarts they got off the train, knowing they’d have to separate soon. (Y/N)’s Slytherin friends waved in the distance, calling out her name.
“Well, I’d better go now. It was a pleasure meeting you two, and it was a welcomed surprise to see you, Hermione.” (Y/N) smiled and took Hermione’s hand, kissing the back of her knuckles. Hermione’s face heated at the action, Ron and Harry deciding they should just start walking to avoid making things awkward.
“Don’t be a stranger. Now that I know you go here I want to spend time with you,” Hermione admitted, not letting go of (Y/N)’s hand until she did it herself.
“I promise, I’ll see you as much as possible. And hey, now we recommend wizarding books to each other.” (Y/N) winked and hugged Hermione goodbye, walking away to see her friends.
Hermione bit her lip before turning to where Ron and Harry had waited for her. She jogged to catch up to them, and they started walking to the carriages.
“So, a Slytherin?” Harry teased and Hermione elbowed him in the side, Ron throwing his head back as he laughed.
This was going to be an interesting year.
End
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Hope that was okay! Thanks again for requesting <3
-Author Max <3
748 notes · View notes
zahraaziza · 10 months
Note
hey lovely i wanted to request masc ellie x a hyper femme reader like me 💋
𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: thank you anon, this is such a cute request! this may be short cause i am on writers block, but still enjoy reading!
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𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒. explicit sexual content. 𝐦𝐝𝐧𝐢.
—୨♡୧ now playing 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐥𝐲𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 (𝐥𝐨𝐥𝐨 𝐳𝐨𝐮𝐚𝐢)
as opposites attract, at least they do to ellie…
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εїз masc!ellie making you sit pretty, whilst she kneels to slip on your shoes, planting a tender kiss to your knee followed by a faint pat to the planes of your thighs, inferring to you that you're good to go
εїз masc!ellie leaving small pecks along your poor little finger once a perfectly manicured nail snaps off, gingerly brushing the pout off your soft lips with the pad of her thumb, before uttering a soft spoken promise that "we’ll get it fixed, baby"
εїз masc!ellie impatiently waiting on her lovely baby to climb into the passenger seat of her car, all giddy, flashing a new fresh set of shimmery nails at her, whose face never misses to light up like a billboard, too goddamn cute to be fair
εїз masc!ellie nuzzling the flat of her palm between those supple thighs of her very own passenger princess, fingertips nonchalantly riding up just below the hem of your skirt, faintly drawing shapes along your silky serene skin
εїз masc!ellie toying with the ribbon you so delicately wrapped around your hair, the tiny milky colored pearls glued to your nails or that sparkly pendant of the necklace, she just lovingly clipped to the back of your neck, instantly turning into mush at the sight of your puckered lips and eyebrows knitting together, "shh, it's alright, baby, i'll fix you back up"
εїз masc!ellie having you sit at her feet, all sweet and pliable, resting your cheek against her knee, dreamily gazing up at her with those eyes of yours shining with cherries and wine for no one but her, whilst she tenderly pats the back of your head, "what a sweet little thing you are for me, aren't you?"
εїз masc!ellie studying your features in awe, as you meticulously accentuated them in shades of rosy make-up, letting her train of thought wander off to what a shame it would be to see it all smudged, running down that prettily fucked out face, once she gets to have you all to herself
εїз masc!ellie snapping polaroids of you all dolled up, in her favorite pieces of lingerie, and exposed under her enticed fingertips, hiding your bashfully flushed cheeks, which she'll keep tucked away inside her wallet or phone case
εїз masc!ellie gently slipping the embroidered velour of your light dolly stockings up your legs, littering lukewarm, wet kisses along what the material is bound to engulf, lightly brushing your velvet clad skin with the tip of her nose, savoring your irresistible floral scent
εїз masc!ellie tangling her velvety tongue with yours, tying cherry knots in the cup of your mouth, dragging out each and every kiss, desiring to earn what felt like a lingering taste of your delectable raspberry flavored lip gloss
εїз masc!ellie taking her sweet time to trail kisses above the delicate little bow gracing the waistband of those lace panties, meshing her most beloved softer parts of yours to a present only for her very fine hands to unwrap, before fucking you stupid against the sheets
εїз masc!ellie whispering sweet nothings into the shell of your ear as she tends to your drooling princess parts, doting praises dripping off of her freckled lips like honey, sliding her glistening fingers deeper and there go your candied mewls like music to her ears, "that's right, baby, keep feeling good for me, just like that"
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༺♡︎༻𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: @scarstarlet @millersaurora @anchoeritic @ellabsprincess @seraqhites @cowgirlcherrie @abbyskitty @destielcore @elliessknife @dropsofs4turn @milllersfae @cherriesxinthespring @dixonsdolls @digit4lslut @porcelainbambi @angvlita @kissesskittens @fxiryverse @elliesbelle @starologist @kokomos @xioriae @machetegirl109 @abbys-wife @lightpinkprincess444 @hazywazysmind @winfleurs @elliephobic @lias-writings @lonelyfooryouonly @beforeimdeceased @angel4abby @hehatesmati
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︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶⠀୨♡୧⠀︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶
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