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starlitmark · 3 months

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Summary: Both being in the NSFW content creation sphere, you and Yunho find a mutually beneficial piece of content to film. Pairing: NSFW Audio Creator!Yunho x Only Fans Creator!reader Tropes: Adult Content creator au, friends with benefits au Genre: smut Rating: R 18+ Warnings: language, the reader is smaller than Yunho by a good amount Smut Warnings: recorded sex, blindfolding, auralism, protected sex, implications of a hand kink, use of the name “daddy”, pet names, nipple play, clitoral stimulation, ripping clothing Word Count: 2,416 Host Tag: @sanjoongie @thelargefrye February Filth Masterlist Before You Interact

Listen to ♡ Often by The Weekend

“You’re sure you’re not going to get kidnapped?” Yeri checks for the tenth time.

“I’m sure!” You laugh, “This isn’t my first rodeo. I’ve talked with him before, too, several times. You know Yunho and I are friends.”

Yeri’s jaw falls to the floor. You meet her eyes through your mirror after you finish fixing your makeup. You look at her as if you’ve just said the most mundane sentence in the world. On the other hand, she looks as if you just told her you’re not actually who you told her you are.

“You mean to tell me–”

“I haven’t fucked him. Not in the literal sense, at least.” You explain, “We’ve fucked around in DMs before a few times but nothing in person yet. We’re genuinely friends, too, it’s not just about our jobs. He’s seen me. I’ve seen him. We’re both being safe. Now go back to your own apartment unless you want to witness something you probably don’t want to.”

She shakes her head and scrunches her nose. You laugh at her action and start walking her toward your front door. You start to pull your door open to let her out when she starts to sound like a broken record.

“Seriously, if you think he might–”

She’s cut off by someone clearing their throat. She turns around, and you look up. He’s right in the doorway, looking devastatingly handsome. Yeri buttons her lip and slips past him. You bid her goodbye as she’s already halfway to the elevator.

“Come on in.” You smile at the tall man, moving to let him in.

“It’s nice to see you in person finally.” He smiles

You nod, mouth suddenly dry, “I hope it wasn’t too bad of a trip here.”

“No,” he shakes his head, “It was actually really nice. It’s beautiful out.”

You’ve been friends online for a while now, and this sudden awkward tension is almost suffocating. Yunho smiles at you and takes your hand in his. You look at your connected hands before looking back up to his face. You’ve seen him before in pictures you exchanged in the past. Some of them are more distracting than others. Seeing him in person seems to create a whole new level of devastation for your panties and your heart at the same time.

He drops your hand and leans against a bookshelf at the edge of your entryway. He’s nearly the same height as it. You need a stool to reach the top shelf of it. Now you take in just how tall he is. You knew he was tall. Knowing a fact versus seeing it is so different. You already know his cock is big too. You’ve been blessed to see it several times. Your mind starts to wander to your activities planned for the afternoon.

“You okay?” Yunho’s eyes fill with concern, “If you don’t want to do anything, we don’t have to. We can just hang out.”

“No, no,” you chuckle, “I just forgot how… big you are…” You admit.

Yunho smirks as he leans over you while leaning against the bookshelves. You gulp at the sight.

“Did you, sweetheart?”

Fuck.

Your mouth goes dry again, trying to find a proper response. You knew damn well what the plan was walking into today. Both of you had planned out the entire scene in depth to ensure safety and quality content for your followers. Hearing his voice, seeing that stupidly hot smirk, everything about him renders you speechless.

“Sweetheart?” He calls again, “You still with me?”

You nod, “Just… thinking…”

“About?” He leans in close enough that you can feel his breath against your lips.

“We have a bit of content to film, and–” You stop yourself and stare at his lips for a moment.

“And?” He questions.

Your gaze stays fixated on his lips, “And… I fucking need you right now.”

Yunho doesn’t waste a moment closing the gap between you. The way he pulls you tight against him, combined with the heat of the kiss, makes your knees buckle. You stand there for a while, just kissing him. Your neck hurts a bit from stretching up to reach him, though you’re sure he is hurting more from craning down. By the time you pull away, your lips are puffy and wet with spit. His aren’t in much better condition; he has a bit of your lipgloss smeared near his own lips.

“Is your camera all set up?” He asks, his voice slightly raspier than earlier.

“Mm,” you hum, “You’re okay with your face being on camera?”

“We already talked about that.” He reminds you, “It’s okay. My face isn’t fully a secret to my audience.”

You take his hand in yours again and guide him toward your room. As you had told him before, your camera is already set up in front of your bed. You reach over and press record before you even say another word to him. As much as you’d love to get wrecked by him now, you know the goal is to get content. Your high-quality microphone is already connected and tested to ensure it gets the best recording it can. After all, it’s not just being uploaded to your Only Fans. The audio from today is being edited and uploaded to Yunho’s NSFW audio subscription as well. Short free clips are going to be posted on both of your Twitter accounts in addition to helping with the traction. Before you get in the view of the camera, you slip your shorts off from under your oversized T-shirt. Per the agreed-upon scene, you’re playing the role of his pretty little stay-at-home girlfriend and won’t be needing pants if you’re at home all day.

“You ready, princess?”

You know he’s put on his acting, but he still searches for any uncertainty in your eyes.

“I’m ready, Daddy.” you respond, voice sweet and needy.

Despite neither of you truly having a daddy kink, you both agreed to that title for Yunho to both protect his identity and play into the content you both know people want. You sit on the side of your bed and look up at him with wide, faux-innocent eyes. Yunho hums and leans down to cage you against the bed. One hand slips back a bit to grab a silk tie just behind you. He pulls it off of the bed and leans back a bit to hold it between you.

“We’re gonna play a little game, okay?”

You nod, “Will I get to feel you?”

“Oh, sweetheart, you’ll feel me. You just won’t see a damn thing.”

Yunho leans forward again and kisses you sloppily. The wet sounds of your kiss are enough to make you rub your thighs together. He, of course, notices it and grips your thigh with his other hand. Massaging the flesh, he pushes your oversized shirt up to expose your soaked panties. He guides you back further until you’re nearly laid down. He drops the tie just long enough to pull the shirt off of your body. You’re only left in your panties while he’s fully clothed. That doesn’t last long, though. He pulls his own shirt off. You appreciate his toned body and end up fixated on the noticeable bulge under his sweats. You gulp before meeting his eyes again.

“Can’t I suck you off for a bit? I wanna be a good girl for you.”

Yunho gives you an endearing smile, holding your chin in his hand, “That’s so sweet of you, baby. As much as Daddy would love that, I have other plans for us today. I’m gonna blindfold you now, okay? You know our cues.”

“Colors, if I can speak. If not, two taps for a break and three for a full stop.”

He kisses you again, “That’s my girl.”

It’s for the camera, you know that. Still, it doesn’t stop you from nearly melting at the praise. He takes the black silk tie and carefully secures it around your head, checking to make sure it’s not too loose or tight. You feel him guide you to lie down on your bed and push your thighs apart to be flat across the bed as well. Every sound sounds so vivid. The soft sound of his hands moving across the bedding, the gentle sounds of his breath by your ear, even the light creaking of your bed as he puts his full body weight on it. A gasp escapes your lips as he leaves more wet kisses along your throat. The noises he makes as he kisses you while letting his hands wander are enough to make your panties even more soaked than they previously were.

“You’re so jumpy, baby.” He chuckles, “Relax, let me make you feel good.”

“Daddy,” you whine, bucking your hips when his hand trails along your inner thigh.

“Yes, princess?”

You gasp when his kisses reach your chest, “Need–”

You let out a broken whine when he wraps his lips around one of your nipples. His fingers lightly trail up and down your thighs, intentionally skipping over the place you need him most. Each time you buck your hips toward his touch, he lightly nips at your chest. The lack of vision only heightens your other senses more. Each time he so much as grazes your body, you jolt in reaction. Each word he says and each noise he makes sends you into another plane of existence.

You feel his body pull away from you, leaving behind a waft of his addictive scent. You feel as he pulls your panties to the side and strokes through your folds. The squelching sounds that come from your lower lips are loud. Each rub against your clit, each time his pretty, long fingers push into you, you feel yourself crave him more. He fucks you on his fingers for a while. His thumb presses perfectly against your clit while two of his other fingers thrust in and out of you at a pace that makes you see stars. His unoccupied hand holds one of your thighs down. His fingers dig into your skin in a way that may leave bruises, not that you mind at all.

“You hear that, sweetheart? You’re so fucking wet. What’s got you such a wreck? Hmm?”

“Daddy, I– fuck! Everything, it’s everything!”

“Everything? It’s how you keep whining and moaning while I finger your pretty little pussy, the way I’m speaking to you, the fact that you can’t see a damn thing. You’re at my mercy, sweetheart.”

You want to close your thighs so badly due to the amount of pleasure you’re feeling. A light slap on your thigh stops your action. A moment later, Yunho pulls his fingers from inside you, and you feel his weight lift off of the bed. The sound of foil ripping fills the space, followed by a low, growly groan. Though you can’t see it, you know Yunho kept his promise to put a condom on.

“Daddy,” your voice wavers with uncertainty.

You feel his hand rest against your waist, “It’s okay, princess. Daddy didn’t leave you all alone. I’m right here.”

The small gesture of reassurance makes your heart flutter for a brief moment. You feel the bed sink again and feel his bare skin against yours. He places a sweet kiss against your lips and whispers a quick check-in.

“You want Daddy to fuck you now?”

“Please, want Daddy’s cock, please.” You whine.

You feel the head of his cock rubs through your folds a few times before pushing in. Your panties are still pushed to the side, though they aren’t terribly in the way. Yunho continues to shower you with filthy comments and praises. Your hands fly forward and feel their way to his hair. Pulling him forward more, you pull him into another sloppy kiss. His thrusts are loud, and the squelching sound of your pussy is louder than it was with just his fingers. Your moans are muffled slightly by his kisses, but still, they’re loud. The fact that you can’t see anything makes it hard to know exactly what is happening.

“Wanna see you.” You request.

“My princess wants to see me now? I thought you liked not knowing what’s coming.” He teases.

“I- I do, but I wanna see Daddy now. Please?”

Yunho gives a particularly punctuated thrust, “Alright, princess, pick up your head a little, and I’ll take it off.”

You do as he says, and light floods your field of view a split second later. It takes a few moments for your eyes to adjust to the light. Once they do, you’re met with the sight of Yunho above you, sat up straight on his knees as he thrusts into you. He has a heated, lust-driven look in his eyes that brings you closer to your orgasm.

“Are you attached to these panties, baby?”

You shake your head at his question. A moment later, the telltale sign of clothing ripping fills the room. You break eye contact for a moment to see that he ripped the seat of your panties and was seconds away from ripping the waistband, too. Yunho smirked at you and leaned in close to your ear.

“I’ll buy you a new pair later, or I’ll pay for you to get some new ones.”

“Daddy, wanna– gonna–”

You’re not on Earth anymore. Your mind is so far gone, lost in the obsession you’ve discovered you have with his voice and the filthy, debauched noises being created in the space. In all honesty, you didn’t even process what he just said to you. All you can think about is the fact that you’re mere moments from your orgasm.

“Pretty baby wants to cum?” He asks, gripping onto your now bare hips.

“Please,” small tears form in your eyes, “Please, please!”

Yunho smirks at you again, “Cum.”

Your orgasm rips through you, stronger than anything you’ve ever felt before. Yunho’s thrusts grow stronger and faster. As you ride out your high, he reaches his own. He releases his load into the condom with a loud groan. His eyebrows furrowed together while his eyes remain locked on your own. You both start to fall from cloud nine around the same moment. Yunho leans down to hover above you and places a small kiss against your collarbone.

“You did such a good job, pretty girl. I’m so proud of you.”

That last comment wasn’t for the camera. That was specifically for you.

Networks: @cultofdionysusnet @kwritersworld @k-vanity

Tag List: @bratty-tingz @yeosangiess @minjaeluver @abbietwilight @wooyoungmybelovedhusband

#yunho smut #cultofdionysusnet #kwritersworldnet #kvanity #joongfryefff24 #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #ateez smut #yunho fanfic #yunho x reader

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mysisters-bike · 7 months

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Eric Harris: Online

We explore Eric's affinity for escapism and his behavior online. Super long post, tl;dr at end.

As a teenager, Eric grew more withdrawn. His interests began to take shape around computers and he was particularly fond of Doom II, a 90’s first-person shooter in which the main character (Doomguy) fights hoards of demons on Earth. Doom II included multiplayer, as did its predecessor, Doom. However, one large development that Eric especially enjoyed was the ability to create custom levels for Doom II.

To this day, Eric’s Doom files (.wad) still roam the internet, somehow miraculously not lost to the sands of time. He seemed to particularly enjoy creating deathmatch levels and would encourage users reading the .readme files for his levels to email him and play with him.

Creating these levels for Doom was a passion project for Eric. He would work carefully on his wads, even going as far to create his own monster death animations. While it’s very easy to create and distribute modifications for most games today, this was an impressive feat in the mid-late 1990s. Computers and access to the internet was still hitting the homefront, albeit in a massive boom. As technology flourished in the home, Eric found a means to channel his creativity.

In the infamous “U.A.C. Labs” level, Eric created two fast-paced levels that incorporate jump-scares, plot-twists, and lots of action. He nearly overloaded one of the areas with a spawn of 150+ some monsters that is triggered by the player coming too close to a key that’s required to access the next area. Eric was very proud of this particular level, writing in the .readme: …This one took a damn long time to do, so send me some bloody credit man!...Authors may NOT use this level as a base to build additional levels. You may NOT change a damn thing with this WAD, if you do, I will blow you up. And it will be cool.

See below: blueprints drawn by Eric in his journal detailing one of his wads. These can be found throughout his writings.

Clearly, Eric was interested in protecting the level’s artistic integrity. This was work he took a great deal of pride in. Eric was described as being interested in pursuing a career in digital development by Brooks, who thought it was feasible he may end up as a videogame designer.

What was it about Doom that Eric enjoyed so much?

For starters, the game was paramount in its offering of gore, metal music, and gameplay. Doom was nonstop action with intriguing stories that could be followed along in both game and book. It is my theory that Eric enjoyed high-paced, high-action activities to stimulate a mind he was not entirely comfortable being alone with. This was also a world in which Eric could control – he could smite down the monsters in his path and he knew what lay around every corner. This may be considered a form of escapism, which is not necessarily new behavior in teenagers. Interestingly, however, there are multiple studies that have been conducted specifically observing the video game escapism phenomenon.

During periods of heightened psychological distress and escapism, the individual increases the amount of online activity, video game play-time, and gambling frequency (Jouhki, Savolainen, Sirola, & Oksanen, 2022). These three behaviors are specifically intriguing as they all provide forms of distraction.

Have you ever been to a casino? There are no windows, therefore, there is no sense of the passage of time. You are inundated by flashing lights, loud sounds, bright colors, and excitement. I once found myself with a drink in hand, sitting at a digital slot machine with interesting animations and upbeat music. It was a penny slot, but I won $20 on my first try. Next thing I knew, my friend and I had spent 5 fast hours playing slots, digital blackjack, and having the time of our lives. I ended up only losing $10 in the end.

Casinos are intended to be a distracting environment that draws in the consumer and traps them for hours of endless stimulation. This is the same idea applied to video games, which are intended to provide hours of entertainment, something humans are constantly in search of. For example, small rodents do not require a television. While providing pet rodents with enrichment is undoubtedly very healthy for them, their enrichment simulates foraging, which is their biological purpose. Humans, now more than ever, rely on entertainment from every angle. It is especially difficult for those going through a psychological hardship to not stimulate their minds. Rather, it can be easier to avoid and escape the difficult and, often, intrusive thoughts. Psychological distress and a method to avoid dealing with such troubles creates the perfect storm within an emotionally unintelligent and unequipped teenage boy.

Eric spending hours building a new level in Doom was simply a way to ease the passage of time. Controlling and manipulating the environment may have provided a sense of control that was not otherwise found in everyday life. In addition to this, Eric understood Doom better than he was capable of understanding his emotions.

To Eric, Doom symbolized something he was not: powerful, strong, and capable. In the basement tapes, Eric and Dylan explain their murderous motivations. Eric references his favorite game: “It’s gonna be like fucking Doom man; after the bombs explode.”

I often argue against the claim that video games were to blame for Eric’s violent behavior and plans despite this evidence. Longitudinal studies have proven that video games do not influence violent crime or behavior. After a 2-year study on Singapore youth, it was concluded that 27 hours of gameplay per day would be required to see any clinical effects or behavioral changes due to violent video games (Ferguson and Wang, 2019). In Eric’s own words, he was fighting himself to separate from his moral compass in order to follow through with the plan he and Dylan had been concocting. In order to do this, he began to think of their plan like it was another Doom level he was crafting. Video games may not be the direct cause of Eric’s violence, but I do believe he used them to justify his violence (to himself).

It was also during this time that the social internet was booming. WebChat Broadcasting System (WBS) and American Online (AOL) began the excitement of site hosting and chatrooms. Personal profiles encouraged a space for teenagers like Eric to freely share their thoughts and interests and connect with others on a scale that had not yet been seen before. Eric took an extremely strong liking to the new social sphere he’d discovered and created multiple AOL profiles and webpages.

Eric even created a webpage to host a series of “Jo Mamma” anti-jokes, crediting himself, Dylan, and Zack Heckler under their respective screen names Reb, VoDkA, and KiBBZ. One of the jokes on their site read: Jo mamma so fat she doesnt even look at the nutrition value tables on the food boxes she eats.....she just buys them and eats them.....cause shes fat...JJJEEYAAAAAA!!!!

Much like people today sharing private thoughts on Facebook or Twitter, Eric was sharing his private thoughts on his own websites. Ranging from “jo mamma” jokes to death threats, Eric didn’t hesitate over-sharing every thought he had on his personal blog.

Online oversharing is an extremely new and modern communicative phenomenon. The scale at which humans are now able to communicate is unprecedented and, frankly, not something humans were ever equipped to be able to do. Eric’s internet presence feels like a primitive version of how a teenager today would dump their opinions and ideas onto Twitter.

On these blogs, Eric would share self-described “missions” in which he and Dylan would test homemade pipe bombs. He described lists of things he hated, desires to kill others, and people he hated. As we have already discussed, Eric would also make mention of Brooks Brown.

Eric would also describe fantasizing breaking into Brooks’s home and urinating on him and his family members and would also, unprompted, share Brooks’s phone number in a “mission” post. Eric would share Brooks’s number online on multiple occasions:

…This mission was also liquor free as a result of this person named Brooks Brown (phone number) who tried to narc on us.

A reason he might have shared such tenacious things online was to seek the thrill of seeing what he could publicly get away with or attention from outsiders. Eric might have enjoyed attention from any angle, be it support for his ideals or shock. This attention, no matter where it came from, would still feed his ego. Eric wanted people to see and he didn’t care what they thought.

Studies have shown that individuals who post their own photos or private messages to personal blogs are attempting to construct their desired public identity (Jung, Song, & Vorderer, 2012). As Eric shared more and more deeply personal thoughts, he was further crafting the public Doom-esque image of himself he wanted others to see.

Eric also displayed a troubling tendency to overshare online. Have you ever scrolled on your social media timelines and found a post that was just unsettlingly personal and wondered, Why on Earth would anyone want to share that publicly?

The tendency to overshare just stems from an overall need for attention. Social media provides a very easy way to continuously farm serotonin. Consistently sharing ideas and thoughts into a space where others can very easily validate them can almost serve as catharsis for a large amount of people. However, oversharing on social media has actually been discovered to have a direct association with anxiety issues, problematic social media use, and attention-seeking behaviors (Shabahang, Shim, Aruguete, & Zsila, 2022).

I theorize that Eric was mainly searching for attention with each new entry he put forth onto the internet. This was a teenager who had been deprived of the right kinds of attention and would seek to push boundaries in order to get it. His posts were also indicative of his declining mental state. As his posts became darker and darker, it became clear that this was not only Eric’s outlet for gaining attention, but in some areas had evolved into his personal massacre planner.

Read one of Eric's most troubling online posts here (pages 39 and 40)

What would prompt someone to write such horrible things? Why did Eric feel this way? Why did he claim to hate the world? What about his life left him and Dylan feeling like they “had no other choice?” I theorize that Eric projected his loneliness and lack of meaningful relationships onto the rest of the world. After all, how could any of this be his fault? In his mind, something must have been terribly wrong with him to be rejected by everyone.

Why was he so angry? Truly, we can see that Eric’s anger was displaced. I theorize that Eric blamed the world that felt like it had betrayed him so many times for his shortcomings. His self-esteem was incredibly low and he was poor at maintaining friendships. From time to time, he was targeted by bullies and felt like an outsider. Rejected children often react aggressively and underestimate how disliked they are by their peers.

Numerous witness statements describe a distaste or distrust of Eric. One incident after another, people found Eric unapproachable. He kept mutual friends with Dylan, but it’s most likely he was more Dylan’s friend in the circle than he was anyone else’s.

TL;DR:

Playing Doom and creating .wads for the game was a form of escapism for Eric; he could create a world he was in control of

Escapism damages an individual's ability to solve emotional problems; it's not a relief, it's merely "putting off" the problem the individual must solve without teaching any healthy coping mechanisms

Eric was crafting an image of himself that he wanted others to perceive; someone who was strong, badass, in control, and took no names...all of which he did not truly think he was. Eric knew he was just an average teenage boy and he hated it

Eric needed attention from anyone he could find, whether or not those accolades be positive or negative. He was pushing his boundaries to see what he could get away with; to see what he could feel

I've been taking all of what I'm posting from a case study I wrote a while back. I keep forgetting to cite my sources since it's...you know...tumblr.

References:

Ferguson, C. J. & Wang, C. K. J. (2019). Aggressive video games are not a risk factor for future aggression in youth: A longitudinal stud. Journal of Youth and Adolescence, 48. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10964-019-01069-0

Jouhki, H., Savolainen, I., Sirola, A., & Oksanen, A. (2022). Escapism and Excessive Online Behaviors: A Three-Wave Longitudinal Study in Finland during the COVID-19 Pandemic. Int J Environ Res Public Health, 19(19). doi: 10.3390/ijerph191912491.

Jung, Y., Song, H., & Vorderer, P. (2012). Why do people post and read personal messages in public? The motivation of using persona blogs and its effects on user's loneliness, belonging, and well-being. Computers in Human Behavior, 28(5). pp 1626-1633. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.chb.2012.04.001

Shabahang, R., Shim, H., Aruguete, M. A., & Zsila, A. (2022). Oversharing on Social Media: Anxiety, Attention-Seeking, and Social Media Addiction Predict the Breadth and Depth of Sharing. Psychological Reports. https://doi.org/10.1177/00332941221122861

#eric harris #dylan klebold #columbine #true crime #tcc #true crime community #psychology #i have a degree :-|

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black-lake · 1 year

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astro observations 8

though most of us think we've learned everything about our own chart, yea we’ve seen it countless times, yet we're always learning new things because we go through experiences that activate and awaken certain parts we either forgot about or overlooked. I shared many of my personal experiences in this post of things I realized later or thought were insignificant.

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🎻 People with capricorn placements tend to be remembered fondly after their death. The type of artists that listening to their music takes you to a different era and makes you feel nostalgic to a time period you never existed in. They also can easily bring old trends, styles or music genres back to life. Signs that are also remembered after death are aquarius and pisces. I always notice it with those last three signs or degrees of these signs.

🎻 It is said that the moon matures at 24°, so I got a degree observation with that. If you have it at 24° or close to it, 23° or 22°, you may feel like you've experienced the full spectrum of emotions and matured so much in your early 20s. In your childhood and teenage years, you may remember dealing with emotions immaturely, possibly acting out with the negative traits of the moon sign. At 24, you feel more aware and in control of your emotions, like you ended a cycle. Your emotional intelligence becomes evident. The emotional world of these natives is almost entirely internal. They do best when they can deal with their emotions in solitude. They're seen as detached no matter how open they get. They keep people guessing what they're feeling and they tend to have a wise aura.

🎻 With moon at degrees from 25° to 29°, natives may feel like they need to share their emotions with either someone close or the world in general, or even through a hobby they have. They may want to be vocal and expressive about how they feel. They tend to be relatable and make others feel heard through just expressing themselves and being open. They may also experience some heartbreaks, making them stronger, braver and and more willing to share how they feel.

🎻 Moon at degrees from 0° to 21° tend to resonate very much with the sign of their moon degree. They might even be mistaken as having their moon in the the sign of that degree. They're seen as energetic and youthful. They often go through trials and errors in testing their emotional depth. They may have been adventurous growing up, experimenting with things and testing where they feel safest and most secure. They may cling into things, and can be codependent on others. They learn how to develop a sense of detachment as they reach their 20s.

^ if you have your moon at 0° to 21°, which I'm least familiar with cuz I don't meet many ppl with these degrees, please do tell me how it resonates with you and your experience with your moon.

🎻 I noticed that most iconic artists have significant uranus or neptune aspects in their chart, conjunction and oppositions with personal planets in particular. I associate these two planets with artistic abilities and talents. Both give visionary minds and expand the imagination. They are outer and generational planets, so whatever art these ppl create is impactful and undeniably timeless.

🎻 Your first love or just the person you first felt really intimately connected to may have placements or degrees of the sign of your 8th house. I have an 8th house in capricorn and my first love had a cap sun and stellium and an aqua stellium.

🎻 In my experience the 8th house is more important in relationships than the 7th. To me the 7th is about connections in general. Even though I have sag in the 7th and pluto right there, I obvs anticipated a significant relationship with a sag or something but it never happened lol. I end up having a casual and lighthearted connection with them, the traits they embody compliments my rising and it's an easy going connection that stays in the friend zone. Not with cap men, even if I want to be friends with them, there's tension that either drifts us apart fearing the friendship or it instantly develops to an intense relationship. It's because my 8th house is in capricorn, and my pluto and mars are both at 10°. So check the degrees too.

🎻 For the longest time I resonated with being way more plutonian than saturnian, because I don't have any capricorn placements or significant saturn aspects, but so many obvious plutonian aspects. But once saturn hit the highest point in my chart, conjuncting my mc, I realized how much this planet affected my life all along and I was oblivious. For instance, I have so many capricorn degrees and sun in the 10th. I was overlooking that I have capricorn in the 8th and 9th, which means saturn rules both houses, and it rules the 10th too since it's in aquarius plus at 22°. I also have a stellium in the 11th with saturn right at the cusp there, so it even influences the the house that is most active in my chart. Can't wait for saturn 11th transit 💀

🎻 Speaking of that, if you have sun in the 10th house, you probably try hard not to look or sound arrogant because people tend to think you're confident even if you're not. Whenever you speak people listen and others may hate on you for thinking you're better than them and you don't even know them lol. It's so hard to make friends with this but I don't hate it, because it gives me the strategic ways to be persuasive and get my way with authority figures. May apply to leo in the 10th or people with cap/leo mix (I bet y'all were called arrogant at least once lol).

🎻 As someone that is very influenced by pluto (square sun, trine venus, semi-sextile mars, conjunct chiron, opposite ascendant, quintile mc), I painfully understand how plutonians feel like their struggles are never rewarded, at least not the reward they anticipated. Yknow with saturn you go through hardship you learn this and that and you get tangible fucking results that you can fucking see. With pluto what is it again? your inner strength and eventual realization of "ta-daaa you went through it, you thought you couldn’t.. that's the reward". Plutonians out there waiting to be truly happy, truly loved, truly effing rich 💀 and get a damn break.

🎻 Another aspect I overlooked was mars opposite saturn, just because I have it at 10°, but I experienced every single thing related to this aspect. I feel like I learned so much about it the hard way and I wanted to do a post sharing what I learned with people that got mars-saturn harsh aspects. If you have it, your flow of energy may be a little off, not knowing when to STOP doing a task and when to start again. Being stubborn with your work wanting it to be done instantly and perfectly like your body is some type of machine taking orders, but saturn will put obstacles in your way until you learn patience and contentment. Can be harder to deal with if mars is in a fixed or cardinal sign.

🎻 With mars-saturn harsh aspects, you may feel the urge to act on your martian qualities but if you disregard what saturn is there for, you'll find yourself back at square one. It's about listening to your body and not ignoring your physical and mental exhaustions. Taking short breaks and organizing your time instead of giving up all together in rage. You're not running out of time if you do so, in fact pushing through too hard is what's a waste of time. It's not a wise use of energy because your work won't be as efficient and your perfectionist ass will redo it. If there's an absence of a healthy work-life balance, these natives can internalize a tremendous amount of anger that can be detrimental to their health.

🎻 I always laugh at capricorns saying that capricorn is a cursed sign because it's so true but also absolutely untrue at the same time. 💀 These natives need to understand certain life patterns, qualities and duties that once figured out unlocks so much success and tangible results that are long lasting. Cap placements especially sun and stelliums give me the sense that they inherited some of their ancestors qualities, if you believe in that, but they go through some hardships with the patterns that come with these qualities. They have a choice to cut the patterns that don't serve them, whether in behaviors or ways of thinking and utilise what they already have with persistence and strategy.

🎻 Well it's march already, who's excited for a little pluto break? It's finally leaving capricorn and entering aquarius on the 23rd and I can't wait tbh. It's like a more intense uranus in aquarius transit, yes we will see a new sense of freedom, some drastic changes, and some said authentic people popping up, new sources of income, new values that aren't necessarily money related, systems that aren't as controlling, maybe new communities or apps on the internet that are annoyingly trendy. But with pluto we will see the shadow side of all of that, so buckle up and get ready lol. It's a gradual change tho I don't expect much to happen this year, but we can always be shocked. Also side thought, if your kids are gonna have pluto in aquarius they may be even brattier and harder to control than pluto sag gen.

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rachetmath · 2 months

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Jaune More MC Ruby?

Ruby: That’s why I’m the MC and you're the side character.

Jaune: So because you have silver eyes you’re special?

Ruby: Yep.

Jaune: Even though I cheated Beacon.

Ruby: Yep.

Jaune: I was bullied.

Ruby: Yep.

Jaune: My partner is dead. And because I let my guard down, Ozpin died, and Oscar had no choice but to come on this journey. You know, because of me.

Ruby: Yep.

Jaune: And because Cinder, who works under Salem killed my partner, I have beef with the main villain and her whole crew.

Ruby: Yeah.

Jaune: Salem, who I have way more in common with than most people, the deemed goddess I’m defying her, just like she did with the brothers over a loved one's death. Are you following me so far?

Ruby: … Yeah…

Jaune: Hazel, who mind you, lost his sister. He lost his sister because of the world Ozpin had created, like I did, with Pyrrha.

Qrow: She had a choice.

Jaune: A few days' choice which turned into minutes when Beacon was attacked. Then discovering how bad the situation is, you know with Salem being immortal, I almost hurt if not killed Oscar, making me at the spur of the moment, just as bad as Hazel. And mind you I was willing to fight you on that.

Ruby: Uh… yeah…

Jaune: Tyrian, has the opposite to my semblance. Wasn’t he more interested in me than you? And you were his target.

Ruby: Mmhmm.

Jaune: Let’s talk about Cinder again. Cinder had two stray kids who followed her. I have Ren and Nora. Neither have parents. Also, we both want power but for different reasons. We even have different views on destiny.

Ruby: Oh damn.

Jaune: Atlas. Oscar did Ironwood not act like how I did in Argus but worse?

Oscar: Yeah he did. Jaune even saw Salem in person before you did.

Yang: So did we. You saw her face to face.

Oscar: I’m Ozpin. What is that supposed to mean?

Ruby: Oscar, not helping.

Jaune: Neo. We both lost our partners. The difference is that I have friends while she has none. The cat, him, and I almost have the same ability except he manipulates your soul or takes it. He might as well have been a devil version of me.

Weiss: O. Dear lord.

Jaune: Watts. … … … You know what no. He-he was no. Like he could have done better, he’s an example of being smart yet making the dumbest choices.

Weiss: True.

In the Twilight

Watts: What?! My decision was understandable.

Ironwood: No. No, they were not.

Penny: Like you could have logically put your two weeks in and left for another kingdom. Or country. Like Vale. Mistral. Anywhere. You could have helped where you could've been needed. Which would have made you better than my father.

Watts: I wasted my life.

Back to Remnant

Ruby: Um….

Jaune: You know what I have to ask this question. What is the moral of the story and how does your character fit into this?

Ruby: Well my-

Jaune: Let me retort. I lied. I was bullied. I had no idea about anything in the hunting world. I needed a teacher. I lost someone important to me. I have beef with the main villains. I train to get stronger to be of use to others.

Ruby: So?

Jaune: Okay. No one believed in me. But I still went to chase my goal. I lost the best thing in my life. I still moved forward. I had to kill someone. Still moved forward. I’m an old man trapped in a boy's body. Still moving forward. Fighting the odds that are stacked against me. I have seven who no one knows about. Yet your family is more interesting.

Ruby: Your point?

Jaune: The moral of the story is that no matter your circumstance you can always be better. Never allow destiny or grief to influence your entire life. No matter what odds that stand before you, you can ultimately change your fate. And no matter the darkness a simple soul can light up the night and unite everyone against a greater evil. Even when the whole world is against you, you are never alone to endure it. If we stand united and look past our differences only then the wor;d would be a better place.

Ruby: Well my mom died at Salem’s hands.

Jaune: And?

Ruby: It's still relevant.

Jaune: You're right. But how many times has your mother been mentioned and you bothered to get information about her?

Yang: I-

Jaune: Bitch shut the fuck up. You were looking for the deadbeat mom more than the mom who stepped up.

Ruby: Well um… um…. Damn. Oh, but I-

Jaune: You weren’t the sword. I may not have known Penny as long as you, but the fact, that I could've saved her proved her death hit harder than Pyrrha's. I’m close to walking in Raven’s path.

Ruby: Shit.

Jaune: And back to your mother. She was a silver-eyed warrior. But Salem is still here. Do silver eyes work on her?

Ruby: Um.

Jaune: Because Salem is still both the brothers' creation. The old humanity. She can't be phased by the black liquid even though everything they touch decays.

Ruby: She's immortal.

Jaune: Yeah but again when Maria told you her story didn't she try using her silver eyes on humans and it didn't work?

Ruby: Cinder.

Jaune: Grimm arm.

Ruby: The hound.

Blake: Silver-eyed person too but only stunned them.

Ruby: Blake.

Blake: What a minute he had animalistic ears. Should I be concerned for my people?

Jaune: Yeah… we’re not getting into that. The point is if you go see Salem and your silver eyes don't work then your mom died for nothing.

Ruby: Oo. Um…

Jaune: And let's get back to the other villains. Besides Emerald, Mercury, and Tyrian, some of them have valid reasons to join Salem.

Ren: Jaune!

Jaune: Ren, your village got destroyed.

Ren: Nevermind.

Me: Hold up. Let me start. With Cinder, a huntsman saw what she was going through and didn't bother to help her. She was alone. The world abandoned her.

Jaune: So Hazel was right. In fact, Raven had a point.

Oscar(Ozpin): Mr. Arc I-

Jaune: Motherfucker Hazel had every right to be angry. Dude shadow missions involve us going with experienced hunters. Yet his sister died and Ruby could’ve died. Shadowing them. Following their lead. Does that not show how bad the hunting system is? Not just that we got hunters who died in the line of duty. Not to mention how some were sexually harassing the girls. And some of them are just plain crazy or assholes. Not to mention Blake, Qrow, and Raven. You let them in. And to make matters worse you chose Pyrrha, a first-year student, to be your maiden.

Oscar(Ozpin): She was my best option.

Jaune: So Glynda wasn't on the table? A high-ranked fourth-year student wasn't on the table? Man, at least you could have chosen Ruby considering she has silver eyes and is a young upcoming prodigy. That would have made her more important. Like Ozpin Ruby off the bat was better than Pyrrha.

Qrow: Hey, I would have stopped that.

Jaune: O, so… it was okay with Pyrrha… but not your niece. I see. Hypocrite.

Qrow: Damn. Set myself up for that.

Jaune: Watts, despite his stupidity, had a point. James would abuse any source of technology just to have some level of control over something. Why did you think he wanted your sister instead of Penny? Why do you think he wanted Amity up as quickly as possible? Why do you think he hacked into Penny? Everything was always about control.

Weiss: Well our lives weren't easy.

Jaune: That I won't deny. Yet we are all still bad people.

Yang: Jaune my mother -

Jaune: Raven and Summer left you. Summer no one cared enough to talk about. Raven doesn't matter at all. Willow waited until her children were teenagers or young adults to start dealing with an abusive father. And Kali… yeah she should have slapped some sense into her daughter.

Weiss: Well your mom doesn't love you.

Jaune: Don't care. Back to Jacque though how does he and James know each other? Why do they have beef with one another? Unless… o. Oh no. Don't tell me. Did James set Jacque up with Willow? And in return, he helps James rise to power. Or did James love Willow but because of his career he couldn't marry her? Could Winter be-

Weiss: Please stop. I do not need those theories in my head.

Jaune: Fine. The point I'm trying to make is… … well how about you explain.

Me: It's crazy how Jaune fits the main character role better than Ruby.

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disaster-theysbian · 10 months

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Gotta say, I've been out as a lesbian for 3 years and nonbinary for a year and a half. And I've noticed something.

Just because someone *always* gets your name and pronous correct, and angrily calls out anyone who forgets, doesn't necessarily mean they support you.

Conversely, just because someone struggles to remember your name and pronouns, or can't wrap their head around gender neutral/neo pronouns at all, doesn't necessarily mean they DON'T support you.

This is applicable to any situation really not just queer shit. Watch what people do, not just what they say, and you will find your friends. Someone might shower you with compliments and have common interests with you, but what happens when you tell them no? Do they get angry when they are corrected? Do they have kind things to say about other people?

My colleagues wouldn't know a gender-neutral pronoun if one hit them in the face with a dictionary, but they make sure I've had a lunch break and get home safely. They have my back if I have a difficult patient. They defend me against other staff members who like to create drama and bitch about people as if they're still in the school playground. If someone has something to say about me being a big ol' queer, they make it known that discrimination has no place in our unit.

My best friend in the whole entire world forgets my name and pronouns every day. When the organisers of her therapy group changed "men and women" to "people" and "he/she" to "they" in order to be more inclusive, there was outcry. Everything from the "it just doesn't sound right" grammar-policing nonsense to the "f*cking special snowflakes are offended by everything". She came down on them like a ton of bricks. She said if the organisers hadn't told them that it was changing, that they wouldn't have noticed. She told them they obviously haven't loved someone outside of the gender binary and they were missing out. She then told them how she had seen me grow and develop since I came out, and how in awe she was of the person I had become. No, she doesn't understand it at all, but why should that mean that she can't be there for me and appreciate how happy I am to be able to be me? Why should that mean, because you lot don't understand it, that someone with the same issues as the rest of the therapy group feels unsafe and unwelcome and doesn't get their issues resolved? As a result, a few of them changed their minds, INCLUDING HER OWN FATHER, and the rest at least shut the hell up about it.

ON THE FLIP SIDE...

A queer person who used my correct name and pronouns delighted in making me walk on eggshells, inventing reasons to be angry with me, convinced me I was a terrible person and even went as far as to try and turn me against my own therapist. They tried to tell me that my therapist only said I was a good person because she was paid to, and that because they themselves had a psychology degree that they could tell I had all these complexes and needed to work hard to be a good person, and it was unlikely I'd never get there. (I chose to listen to my therapist and stop being friends with this person).

A queer person who used my correct name and pronouns continued to do things that made me uncomfortable when I asked them to stop. Never said in as many words "you're not allowed to hang out with your friends" but conveniently had an emergency every time I had plans, and accused me of being uncaring if I needed my own space. They knew I had difficulty asking for help, but still got angry with me when I asked because I didn't ask "soon enough".

A queer person who used my correct name and pronouns told me they would look after me and they didnt. .

A queer person threatened to misgender me MORE when I corrected them.

I'm just saying, that if you choose to yeet everyone who doesn't get your name and pronouns right... that doesn't necessarily make you safe. We live in a very binary world. As much as we want that to change, it won't if we ignore or shout at the bits we don't like. (Believe me, I've tried).

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faeryarchives · 3 months

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I have no idea if your requests are open or not so I apologize if they're closed 😭🫶

But could I request the octatrio with a fischl reader (female if possible ♡)

I love the octatrio sm rn and I rarely see any works with them so I just had to request

hi hi anon of course! do you think they would accidentally create an elemental reaction whenever floyd pokes oz 🧐

octavinelle with a fischl-like female reader!

a mysterious girl called "prinzessin der verurteilung" travels with oz, a night raven. through her unique abilities, eccentric character, and hard work, she has become a rising star among the guild's investigators, earning all the recognition. and yet she still fares mostly on her own

༉‧₊˚. azul ashengrotto

you were an unpredictable and quite eccentric person! its true that you have a quite different way of talking from others but it made you stand out!

"you dare to call my familiar and grim as monsters?! you must prepare your self, because it is time for retribution!"

"where did you get that bow?!"

"mein fraülein, if i dare to say so - that isn't one of your lines. but thank you for defending me."

your achievements in the school mainly were praiseworthy, azul knew for a fact that you were a strong one that he didn't want to come across with

until you got roped into the octavinelle issue and instead of looking at him with disdain - you were even willing to help him out?! maybe those rumors about you were true at all

as being someone who will willingly go out their way to help others in your own way, even if you come out harsh

what bothered azul most was how you were quick to intervene his plans as well as helping him with his problems

"why are we walking around school? where is oz?" "my dear familiar is taking his good rest. as for the reason of walking around - well i heard from a little bird that you are having a hard time on something. would you like to accept her majesty's help?"

surely and slowly, he was beginning to see right through you, even without oz's interpretation and to be honest? you weren't so difficult to understand at all

the most likely to spoil you rottens by letting you do as you please whenever you went to go visit their dorm

"didn't you mention before that you like reading? you can borrow some of my books here because it just so happens that i am an avid reader myself!" "...! i-i never thought that you were keeping that in mind, thank you azul."

as time goes by, the bad rumors surrounding you gradually dissipative → students will think twice of talking shit about you because this comes as a package deal for being friends with the octavinelle dorm leader.

༉‧₊˚. jade leech

"one is aware that fate has brought me into this path. hm-hm, may the glory of the prinzessin bring light to this wicked world." "oh my, how bold of you to address our world as such!"

true, jade couldn't really understand how you were able to say such things in front of the whole school and shrug it off

he is the type of friend that would take his time to sit down and listen for you for hours and even ask some questions about your previous adventures

"you met your evil twin?" "it was more like a shadow version of me, and oz here decided it was fun to leave me for her." "*gasp* i take full offense to that!" "oh my god, the prinzessin's most beloved familiar is a traitor."

jade knew for a fact that you were entirely different from the octatrio so he tries to steer you away from trouble as much as possible but with your friends and sometimes even floyd, maybe sometimes are not just possible

don't tell the other two but if you would pick someone trust the most to see you behind your act - it would be jade

knowing how observant he is, you wouldn't be surprised if he had seen through you already but you trust him enough and that's all you need

"hmm, this is troubling..."

"what seems to be the problem?"

"it looks like one of the students broke the contract and went hiding among his peers."

"that sounds like a problem, but no worries we can assist you."

color him surprise after seeing your investigation skills 😮 the task that should've took a day to complete got immediately solved less than half a day

and your fighting skills are extraordinary! from that day on, you would get extra allowance every time the octatrio need your help

while you seem capable of yourself, jade took it as his and floyd's responsibility to look after you because you were still kinda an airhead

"(name)..."

"i forgot the stove was still on..."

as you hail into their world as an outsider, he will do his best to provide you the best experience until you bring the glory of the prinzessin among them - after all, that is what friends for

༉‧₊˚. floyd leech

you are such an interesting fishie! or are you a bird? did you just turn into a bird? can you teach him that too?

it was like he finally met someone on the sam wavelength because floyd surprisingly went along with your act - taking the role as your confidant

"ne, ne (name) - can oz talk to other birds?"

"my dear ozzie?"

"'cuz if he can talk in human language can he understand animal language or he is just built different?"

if you think that sometimes you can't understand yourself, you couldn't understand floyd even more!

each of his random question just made you wonder your whole existence because this man will text you at 2 am asking "what would you call a male ladybug?"

"If peanut butter wasn’t called peanut butter, what would it be called?" "for the love of everything, floyd it is 2 am..." "yeah? so what would it be called though?"

being with floyd is like being hit with an uno reverse card and honestly - you were having fun!

it was like you were relieving your childhood with the eel and with his random outburst it motivates you to be more open about yourself

from time to time it was funny to see him trying to chase after oz, trying to ask your familiar over and over again if he could do the same thing

"i am afraid it would not be possible." "but we haven't even tried it out yet?" "why are you wrapping your hands around m- no, no, no we are not going into the water!"

news flash, they did. 😭

anyways! he adores you and oz and never fails to give you your daily hugs

as said before - floyd sometimes gets you in trouble by breaking rules and getting involve in the punishment but hey! some times its okay to let loose but not just too much.

still, you friendship may be a little unexpected to others and floyd knows that you are similar yet also different from each other but he will try to make your stay more bearable than letting you suffer all alone

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munsonluhvr · 3 months

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EDDIE MUNSON’S ♡ LOVE GUIDE ♡

contents: this is a little guide/headcannon on what it’s like for our beloved eddie munson to have a crush or date someone. this is somewhat similar to the a-z sfw/nsfw lists i did a little while ago but a little more detailed and strung together. word count - 782

⟡ what it's like for eddie to have a crush ⟡

eddie is the type of guy to be boldly flirty with someone that he’s interested, having no fear to compliment you or make suggestive comments. however, when you approach him or make flirty comments to him, eddie shuts down not knowing how to respond/function.

eddie believes in chivalry still, so he wants to make the first move but he never knows how. he’ll overthink to his friends, day after day, trying to navigate how to ask you out without being weird. his friends get annoyed with him, often rolling their eyes as he talks about you for the thousandth time that day. they wish either of you would just make a move so they can stop hearing your name being mentioned by eddie.

eddie also hates when he has a crush because he can physically feel himself become obsessed, taking any opportunity to spot you across the hallways in school or stare at the back of your head or profile of your face while he sits in class. he feels himself go from being the nerd, or the freak as people refer to him, to being a lovesick puppy, ready to serve you at any moment. he also becomes flirty and nervous, blushing like crazy as you make eye contact with him or flirt. god, he has such a love hate relationship with having a crush. can’t you just be his already?

when eddie asks you out, finally, he’s flustered and jumbles his words as he speaks quickly. “would you want to go out with me sometime? like on a date?” he asks, his eyes searching yours for a reaction. his stomach is knots, full of angst, as he exposes his deep admiration for you. when you smile, nodding eagerly, he feels instant relief and his mind is quick to beginning planning how he’ll create the best date you could ever go on.

⟡ what it's like for eddie to date someone ⟡

when eddie dates someone, he is the most sweetest bf in the entire world. he’s so concerned with gf, making it obvious that he cares for you deeply. he’ll always ask if you’ve eaten or if you’re hungry. he’ll let you play your “girly pop” music as he refers to the music you listen to, even though he can’t stand it because he loves you so much.

eddie loves giving you affection; in public, he’ll hold your hand or put his arm around you, make even a little kiss on the cheek. he isn’t the biggest fan of public affection but he also likes to make it known that you’re his. in private, however, he’s awfully romantic and cheeky. he loves to make out with you, letting time pass by as you engage with each other’s mouths, his hands roaming around your body.

eddie feels so safe with you as his girlfriend, knowing he can be vulnerable and nerdy in front of you. he know’s you’ll listen to him nerd out about his d&d trials and updates on how the hellfire is dealing with the watch of vecna.

eddie also nicknames you early on in your relationship, wiping your name from his mouth. you’re “baby” or “princess” to eddie, the affectionate names rolling off his tongue with ease. occasionally, eddie says “my sweet girl,” loving how your face relaxes and a smile appears when he calls you that. he knows it’s your favorite nickname but he saves it for rainy days when you’re feeling extra low and need a pick up.

our precious eddie also likes to include you in things he likes. eddie is quick to introduce you to his hellfire club friends, making sure you are well aquatinted with them and know they’re now your friends too. eddie also introduces you to the members in his band; making it clear that he requests your presence, every week, when they perform at the hideaway. you always go, of course. the biggest deal of all, though, is that he lets you mess around on his most prized possession - his guitar.

to be the best bf possible, eddie is sure to spoil you relentlessly. he brings you things that reminds him of you, or make you little birdhouses while he’s in wood shop class. he’ll make mixtapes of songs he hears and thinks you’ll like or bring you to your favorite restaurant after school. eddie will even risk his life, aka climbing up the short trellis that’s against your house up to your window, to visit you when your parents won’t let you go out. eddie will do anything and everything - you’re his princess after all.

#stranger things fanfiction #stranger things x reader #stranger things x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fan fiction #eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson x you

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gingiesworld · 6 months

Text

Family Ties (1/?)

Natasha Romanoff x Werewolf Fem Reader

Warnings: Violence. Torture. Angst.

Taglist : @natashamaximoff-69 @canvascoloredin @wizardofstories

If anyone wants to be a part of the taglist, please drop me a message or comment. Have a boss day my awesome dudes.

18+ MINORS DNI

The Selene clan were well known among the other werewolf bloodlines. They were feared by most, and worshiped by more. Although, power can be an untrustworthy friend to have. Ricard Selene, one of the Elder's who had made a deal with a growing organization, thinking he would be protecting his clan. Only to be proven wrong one night.

As everyone had tried to save the young, running into the woods. Ricard made sure that Y/N was unable to follow her family. As much as she tried to bite and claw at him, he was stronger.

"This will be our new beginning little one." He told her with a smirk as he led her to one of the agents.

Y/N looked around in horror as a vast majority of her family were unfortunate, laying lifeless and scattered among the fields. Y/N tried to get away, but she was only a pup, she was unable to overpower them as they injected her with an unknown liquid, all she knew was that her entire body screamed as her blood felt like it was on fire.

"What was that?" Ricard questioned as the Agent smiled wickedly.

"Aconitine." He informed him as the two watched as Y/N writhed in pain.

"Wolfsbane." He stated as the agent nodded, signaling for another two to place her in a cage.

"This little one will help us create the ultimate weapon." He smirked as Y/N was loaded up into the van. Ricard followed them as he saw the bloodshed because of his actions. He knew at that moment, he would never be accepted back into the clan. He would be murdered brutally if he was found by any of his family.

Although he never realised that Y/N's father, Aaron was watching from the treeline. His youngest in his arms as he felt anger and pain as he watched his daughter get taken away like some rabid animal.

As the years went on, Y/N was experimented on, her blood drawn and studied. She was forced to train endless hours as she had a constant drip of aconitine running through her veins. When the night fell, she would be chained up and muzzled, as though the agents were afraid she would escape.

"Come on mut." An agent sneered as he slashed her arm, causing her to yelp out in pain. "Change." He ordered her. It had become a regular thing, the constant transformations would take its toll on her, especially with the constant injections and lack of nutrition. It was worse than death itself, although she woke everyday, hoping it would be her last. What she never knew was that one of her own family watched every day as she was tortured.

"So, you think this is another base like the Strucker base?" Tony questioned Steve as they all sat in the briefing room.

"Yes." Steve stated. "It is the second base that has been confirmed to take part in experimentation, but is even more heavily guarded than the Strucker base for some reason."

"Maybe it might be another infinity stone?" Thor questioned as Steve shook his head.

"We already found the mind stone in Loki's scepter." He pointed to Vision. "The space stone is off-world with the reality stone. The mind stone is with Dr Strange and the power stone is also off world and who knows where the soul stone is."

"So this base is kind of like Fort Knox." Tony stated. "We would be stupid to go there!"

"But we could be stopping something that could end the world." Natasha stated as everyone turned to her. "Maybe if we ask Fury for a team of agents to help take out the guards while we infiltrate the base, get whatever intel we can get our hands on and blow the place up."

"What if we find prisoners?" Wanda questioned as Tony huffed.

"Leave them behind and let them die." He told her.

"We can't do that!" Steve yelled as Tony scoffed.

"We don't need any more enhanced individuals running around here." Tony told them.

"You can't be serious." Steve scoffed. "They are still human, we can help them like we did with the twins." He gestured to Wanda who played with her fingers at the mention of her brother.

"You can't control their powers, Steve." Tony seethed.

"I don't need to control their powers, I just need to earn their trust and let them know that they are safe." Steve told him firmly.

"So it's settled, any prisoners we bring with us for Cho and Bruce to check out." Natasha spoke firmly, looking around the room and waiting for anyone to disagree, her eyes soon glaring holes in Tony's head.

"We leave at sundown." Steve told them before he left the room with an angry Tony on his tail. Natasha had requested backup for this mission, only getting a firm yes from Fury.

The start of the mission went as expected, many Hydra agents were ready for the attack on the base. The SHIELD agents helped in taking the enemy out and covering the Avengers as they infiltrated the base.

"I have the intel." Tony informed everyone as Nat and Steve had walked side by side, lines of cells were locked but most remained empty.

"We have a prisoner." Steve informed them as he opened the door as Nat entered the cell, her heart broke at the sight of the woman who had been strung up and muzzled.

"What's with the chains?" Nat questioned as Steve helped get her down.

"I wish I knew." Steve told her. "Get ready to catch her." Nat had done as she was told, holding her around her waist as she fell limp in her arms. She could feel her ribs very prominently as she was also extremely light. Steve had also removed the muzzle and picked her up in his arms. "We're on our way out. Bruce, we need you on standby." Steve spoke over comms as Nat covered him.

"Who do we have?" Bruce asked as soon as Steve placed the girl on the gurney.

"It's a female, but I can't quite tell how old. Must be in her 20s?" Steve told him as Bruce started to work on cleaning the wounds.

"We're 5 minutes from landing." Clint notified everyone as Bruce decided to have the girls help with making sure that the patient was secure for landing.

"We're going to need Wanda to look into her mind." Tony stated as they landed.

"No." Wanda shook her head as Steve gave Tony a disapproving look.

"We don't need to do that." Steve told him firmly. "When she is well and ready, then we can question her. Until then, she is off limits." Tony just scoffed as he headed towards his lab, leaving Bruce, Cho and Steve to head to the med bay.

"Do you think she has powers?" Wanda asked as the two entered the kitchen.

"I don't know but the way she was strapped up tells me that there may be a reason." Nat mumbled as she brewed the coffee. "I just don't know what." She turned to face Wanda. "She had a muzzle on, like the one from that vampire show you watch, the one with the two brothers and the doppelganger."

"The Vampire Diaries." Wanda stated excitedly making Nat chuckle. "Do you think she is a vampire?"

"Vampires don't exist." Nat told her with a smirk.

"You never know." Wanda shrugged. "We live in a world where I can move things with my mind, Steve and Bucky have super human strength. We have a God of Thunder who visits regularly, so really anything is possible."

"I doubt that vampires are real." Nat chuckled.

"What about Dracula?" Wanda questioned with a raised brow.

"He was a recluse." Nat told her. "He never showered because he was afraid of water. The reason he was claimed to be a vampire is because of the lack of vitamin D, so he lost the pigment in his skin and the light hurt his eyes. That's where all of the myths come from."

"But it could be." Wanda questioned again as Nat shrugged.

"Anything is possible I guess." She said as she handed Wanda a cup as she walked away with a smirk on her face, leaving an excited Wanda behind.

She made her way to the med bay, standing beside Steve as he looked through the window as Bruce and Cho worked on her.

"Any news?" Nat asked as he sighed.

"No, she is still unconscious, Bruce has taken a blood sample to do some blood work." He told her. "There are multiple scars on her body and her wounds are practically healed."

"She looks just a little older than Wanda." Nat stated as Steve looked at her. "The lines around the eyes." She told him as he nodded. "But why would Hydra have her? What does she have that they want?"

"There have been sightings of beasts running around some Hydra bases." Vision informed them.

"What kind of beasts?" Steve asked as he took the tablet from the synthezoid.

"They seem to be of the canine family." He informed them. "But they also seem to be looking for someone."

"Her." Nat stated as the two looked at her. "The last base they had infiltrated was only 300 miles away from the base we had just been to."

"So do you think she could be one of those beasts?" Steve questioned as she shrugged.

"Let's just see if she wakes up, we can ask her when she is better." She told the two.

"But what if she is a danger to us all?" Vision questioned as Nat shook her head.

"She won't be if we don't string her up like a fucking animal." She growled before Vision left the room.

"So you think we are all safe?" Steve asked her as she nodded.

"Yes." Nat nodded. "She has been a prisoner for who knows how long. If we treat her as one, then yes, she will likely turn. But if we treat her as an innocent, a casualty of war, we may earn her trust."

"I hope you're right about this Natasha." Steve told her before he left, Nat remained watching as the doctor's worked on her. It was a while until she was moved into another room before Bruce came out.

"How is she?" Nat asked him as he sighed.

"She is ok." He told her. "There was a lot of scar tissue and multiple lacerations, but nothing too major."

"Then why is she still out?" Nat questioned as he shrugged.

"I don't know. We did multiple scans and nothing." He told her. "I have her blood work to go over and I will tell you as soon as I have the results."

"Thanks Bruce." She smiled at him as he nodded before heading to his lab. Nat entered the room where she lay sleeping, Nat decided to sit in a chair and wait however long she needed to until Y/N woke up. Looking through the folder she had took from the synthezoid as the steady sound of Y/N's breathing filled the room.

#natasha romanoff au #natasha marvel #natasha romanov #natasha romanoff #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #wanda maximoff #marvel #elizabeth olsen #scarlett johansson x reader #natasha romanoff x female #natasha romanoff x fem!reader

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cupidlovesastro · 4 months

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𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒖𝒄𝒊𝒅 𝒅𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎

this is very different from my regular post, but i thought i’d do a post about this because i have a good understanding of this topic and i like doing it😭

the only things that your really going to need to do this is dreaming often and willpower. you don’t need to be super experienced at ANYTHING or do all these “methods” that people tell you to follow. just utilize the power of your brain !

for context, i started doing this around 13-14. i never had a bad experience with it and i very very rarely have nightmares. maybe 3 once a year, and i dream every single night. also, this is about how i did it and accomplished it !

1. gain consciousness in your dream

instead of mindlessly dreaming like you may do at times, try to gain consciousness in your dream. by that i mean, look at your dream and really pay attention to what’s going on. what do you see, hear, taste, feel? where are you? who are you with? start to pay attention to your dreams because then, you will teach yourself how to understand and actually remember your dreams when you wake up instead of waking up and having no clue what you dreamed of. do this for about a week or so before proceeding to the next step

my experience

when i do this, usually i realize im in a dream because im somewhere ive never been before, or im with people i never see, or something is somewhere it isn’t supposed to be. so when i realize im dreaming, i often tell myself “oh im in a dream”

2. explore a little

so now that you’ve realized your dream, walk around, start thinking of what you may want to say to someone in your dream, music you want to hear, food you want to, etc

my experience

this part is one of the fun parts. you can now start to control yourself and what you do in that realm. so i’ve talked to people i know in real life in my dreams, even people i don’t know. i’ve walked around places i’ve never been as well

3. start controlling things that are already in your dream

so before we get to the part where we control our entire dream, let’s start controlling things our brain has already created. so if you see a person try to control that person to talk to you, if you see a cat try to get that cat to come to you, change the color of the room your in, etc. this will help with your control over your subconscious mind, and is a little more difficult than step 2 because instead of controlling yourself, your controlling the outside world now

my experience

this for me is a little difficult for the main reason being that you have to put a lot of focus and control in it. with step 2 it’s pretty easy to do because you already are aware of yourself in your dream, you just have to control yourself. but with this part you have to control other things, which i’ve done. get someone to talk to me, or changed rooms i was in.

4. create things and / or make things disappear

now we want to sort of form our reality. so you want to start thinking of what you want to see, touch, experience, etc. if you want to see a celebrity, then do it, or if your into manifesting, view your manifestation(s). as for the disappearing part, let’s say you see something that you dislike, try to make it disappear.

my experience

i’ve done this a lotttt but usually it’s unintentional. like i’ll thinking about how i want to see someone, and they’ll appear in my dream. but in the very few nightmares ive had, ive also had to make this disappear 😭

5. create your reality

similar to what i mentioned earlier about what you want in your reality, now you want to completely create that reality. if you want to be at the beach with your friend then create that, or if you want to see your crush/ lover then create them !

my experience

this is the funnest part ofc, and i don’t usually need to create entire realities, but i have created people and things i’ve wanted to see, hear, touch, taste, etc

#astrology #astro community #astro posts #spirituality #dream #dreamcore #lucid dreaming #tarot #crystals #pac tarot #astrology tumblr #astrology stuff

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ladylooch · 21 days

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Strictly Pleasure - [Timo Meier]

A/N: So color me stunned when I went to the roster of Team Switzerland in 2019 and did not in fact see Timo on it……. Because the Sharks were in the playoffs…. LMAO But you know my entire AU timeline is built on 2019 so we go with it. As promised, the full fic for our unanimous poll winners 🥹

As a warning, I literally was clawing my fingernails into the bench seat editing this morning. Holy fuck. Apparently I was feeling extra smutty this weekend.....

Word Count: 4.3k

The coolness of my white wine glass chills my palm while I bring the liquid to my lips. I take a sip, lips curling up in appreciation of both the wine and the stunning sunset before my eyes. I sit on the patio of a cafe in Bratislava, Slovakia awaiting the arrival of my little brother. I am the only member of my family who has been able to make it over to Slovakia in time to see him compete for our country at the IIHF World Championships. His previous international experience has been at the U18 level, but this year he is competing in the big leagues. We are so proud of him and I feel honored to have the flexibility to see him live his dream this week.

Crowds from various countries line the streets of the capital city, surrounding Ondrej Nepela Arena. Various teams are represented- the three crowns of Sweden, the lion of Finland and one man with the red and white of my home country. I smile at the familiar crest on his chest. He wanders down the sidewalk with sunglasses on, hair perfectly styled in a swoop to the left. Mirrored aviators hide his upward gaze to the awning that spells out the restaurant. He flips his sunglasses up, looking down at his phone, then at the name of the restaurant again. Once confirming, he puts his phone back in his pocket, then stalls his footsteps at the podium explaining the menu options for tonight.

“Go Swiss!” I cheer in my native language at him. He looks up from where he had been studying the menu, nodding in my direction.

“You from?”

“Yes.”

“Me too.”

“I assumed so. You have the accent.”

“You… kind of do?” He chuckles, questioning. His head tilts to the side slightly, thick eyebrows pulling lower over his eyes. “Where are you from?”

“Close to Bern.”

“Ah… that southern dialect can be troublesome.”

“Maybe you just haven’t heard it enough. Should get out of the big city.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Zurich. Clearly.”

“St. Gallen.”

“Same difference.”

“Okay.” He chuckles, shifting as he stuffs his hands in the pockets of his jeans. “This place any good?”

“Wine is good.” I cheers my glass in the air at him. “But other than that, I don’t know. My brother picked the place.”

“Yeah, I am meeting someone here too.”

“Would you like to wait with me? I can buy you a drink.” For some reason, he laughs.

“Buy me a drink?” He nods. “Sure, if your boyfriend won’t mind?”

“No boyfriend. I’m sure your girlfriend will not be much longer though?”

“No girlfriend. If I did, sitting next to a beautiful Swiss woman would likely get me into big trouble.” He murmurs, reaching for the back of the empty chair across from me. As he pulls it out, my brother comes hustling up next to us.

“Oh great! You did get my text about Timo joining us. I’m glad you found each other.” We both pause, connecting the pieces of who we are to each other. I would not have pegged him as a hockey player. He presents so different from the others I have interacted with over my brother’s playing career. “Timo, this is my older sister Emma.”

“Nice to meet you.” He murmurs as he shakes my hand. Our hands fit perfectly together in a polite shake. His fingers drag along every inch of my palm as he pulls his hand back, creating an electric jolt up my arm.

“Yeah…” I trail off, answering my brother. I gulp down a sip of wine. “He was easy to spot.” Nico grins as I stand, wrapping my arms around his shoulders. “Hi.” I haven’t seen Nico for a few weeks. He came home to Switzerland after his season ended, but was running off with all his friends with his new found freedom.

“I am glad you could make it. Mama and Papa are coming tomorrow?”

“Yes, it was the earliest they could get here. I was able to get on a flight from my conference in Berlin.”

“Good. More time together.” I laugh, glancing at Timo who studies the menu across from me.

“Seemed you liked the way the last few weeks were.” I murmur. “Your big sister always coming in last.”

“I’m sorry.” Nico sighs regretfully.

“It’s okay. As per usual, your time is pulled in every single direction.”

“Yes, but you’re important to me. I’ll do better.”

“Good! You can start by buying me dinner. You make the big bucks now!”

“Yeah, you can buy mine too. You make 1st overall money. I’m slumming it down at 9.” Timo and I share a look, chuckling together at Nico’s red, embarrassed cheeks.

“With a flick of a pen, you instantly made more money than your sister has her entire career. You can buy my dinner.” I pile on.

“Stop.” Nico shakes his head with a shy smile. “I will buy you dinner because I love you and that’s it.” I shake my head, looking over at Timo.

“Nico always has to be so sweet to make me feel bad for teasing him.”

“You need to get meaner Nico.” Timo laughs. “Your sister is more intimidating than you.” I scoff at him, then smirk.

“Certified man eater.” I confirm. “You better be careful.” He sucks his cheeks in for a moment, scanning his eyes along my body. Then he shakes his head.

“I like a challenge.” He winks. I pause, recognizing his interest, sliding my gaze over to my little brother who seems to be contemplating between two entrees. I lick a drop of wine off my lips after taking a sip. Timo’s blue eyes stay there, then fall back down to the menu in front of me.

The rest of dinner, these small, wordless interactions happen. He brushes my hand while handing me back my filled water glass. We steal looks at each other whenever Nico isn’t looking. Most of the conversation is driven by us towards each other. Nico seems content to listen, happy to see us getting along so well after inviting a stranger to sibling bonding. I am thankful he did. Timo and I are vibing, conversing and joking like we have known each other for years, not less than two hours.

Nico pays the bill, making a huge show of treating us with his black Amex.

“Flaunting your wealth is tacky Nico.” I scold. He scoffs at me, waving me up out of my seat. I toss my arm around his shoulder, pulling him in for a forced hug. “I love you. Thank you.”

“I love you, buddy! Thank you!” Timo says too, coming in to the other side so Nico is sandwiched between us. I giggle hard, tilting my head back towards the dark sky while doing so. Timo’s hands grip my sides as we squeeze Nico harder. I fold my fingers over his arms too, feeling the soft material of his sweatshirt. When I open my eyes all I can see is Timo. His beautiful blue eyes sparkling with joy. His big smile and scrunched nose indicating how much fun he is having with us.

“I could use another drink.” I hear myself say to him directly. He nods immediately, releasing from our packed hug.

“We have a bar in our hotel. Are you staying there too?” Timo asks casually.

“Oh! Yes! Let’s go.” I exclaim. “Neeks?”

“Maybe. I’m tired, but I’ll see how I feel when we get there.”

“Okay.” I shrug. No offense to Nico, but I wouldn’t be disappointed if he didn’t come.

“How are we feeling about the game tomorrow?” I ask the boys as we walk the cobblestone walk way.

“Good. We’ll get it done.” Timo says confidently. Nico echos that though a yawn.

His yawning continues through our first round of drinks until he is almost falling asleep sitting up in his chair where we sit at a space in the bar, backing up to the lobby.

“Nico, just go to bed.” I chuckle.

“Yeah I am going to head there.” Nico sighs after a yawn. He looks over at me. “You too?” I bite my lip, shaking my head.

“I’m not tired. I stay up late for a living.” Nico shrugs his shoulders. “Goodnight.” He stands up.

“Goodnight baby brother.” I tease him as he heads across the lobby to the elevators. “Sleepy good!” I take a sip of my wine, then settle my brown eyes on Timo who still watches with those interested eyes. “Are you tired?” I wonder.

“No.” He says then takes a sip of his drink. “A lot more interesting things are happening down here than in mine and Fiala’s room.” A shiver runs from the base of my neck down my spine pulling my chest tight with flattery.

“You like to stay up late?”

“Mhm.” He answers around another sip of his drink. He licks at his top teeth afterwards, bringing my eyes back to his lips. “Kinda have to in this job. What do you do?”

“I own an event planning business.”

“Oh fancy, Ms. Entrepreneur.”

“I went to college and everything.”

“Impressive. Maybe I should hire you to run my charity golf tournament.”

“I could do that. But it depends.”

“On?”

“What happens between us tonight.” A slow and sexual grin rolls across his lips. He likes my boldness. My heart fluters excitedly in my chest. I love this part, getting gorgeous and powerful men to give into what has been brewing between us. “I have a strict line between business and pleasure. I’m sure you can understand that in your line of work.” Timo nods, looking lost in a previous mistake.

“That is fair.” He tilts his head. A few teammates walk through the lobby, shouting a hello at Timo. He gives a brief wave, then focuses back on me.

“Any chance I could convince you to go somewhere private to discuss further your personal and professional qualifications?” There is nothing professional about his request.

“Where would you suggest?”

“Maybe your room?” I pretend to contemplate, leaning back in my chair while studying him with scrutiny.

“What would we do there?” I ask him, dragging out the vowels in my words. I slowly run my tongue along my lips, gathering his attention there.

“You can tease me some more with that mouth.”

Forward. Bold. Going in for the kill, just like I hoped.

“Our drinks?” He pulls his wallet out, tossing cash onto the table. He stuffs his wallet in the back pocket of his jeans and stands. He holds his hand out for me. I stare at the warm, welcoming skin of his palm. I know what taking that hand means. I know this is dangerous territory, but Timo is a temporary teammate of my brother. It’s not like he is in New Jersey with him full time.

I slide my fingers gently into his hand, then clasp it as he lifts me into a standing position. He weaves our fingers together, palms cupping each other as we walk silently to the elevator. He pulls me in behind him, then turns expectantly at me.

“Four.” I tell him. He presses the button and the doors close.

“You do this often?”

“Yeah. You?”

“Plenty.” His eyes drag ravenously from my face down my body. He nods in surprised appreciation. “I won’t tell you I love you after, if that’s what you’re worried about.” He chuckles.

“You look harder to get than that. What are the rules?” He asks as he turns towards me. His hand drops mine, so he can pull my hips flush with his. My eyes flutter at what I feel. Big. Hard. Ready.

“Wrap it up. Don’t you dare finish before me. No butt stuff. And…” I insist, stepping closer. “Nico never knows.” My foot goes between his, rubbing my thigh against his zipper. He exhales a little heavier, hinting at the desire building in his body. The elevator doors open and we step out. I lead the way, sliding the key through and pushing the door open. I walk in first again. He shuts the door behind us then crosses the slim space between us. He whips me around by my wrist, crowding my space immediately. My heartbeat skyrockets in dangerous and needy passion.

“Anything else?” He asks, sliding a hand to the side of my neck. He holds it tight, thumb stroking my cheek. His blue eyes are fierce, ready for whatever waits for us on the other side of my answer.

“What are yours?”

“I don’t want anything serious. You understand that?” He strokes my cheek as he says it as if to soften the blow. He’s clearly had this conversation before with other women. He’ll figure out I’m not like them soon enough.

“Completely.”

“Are you on the pill?”

“Yes.” I laugh. “Are we going to fuck now or keep playing 20 questions?” I slide my hand down to the button on his pants. He laughs too, pausing as he bites his bottom lip.

“What are your thoughts on cuddling?”

“Hell no.”

“My kinda girl.” He whispers then closes the gap between our faces.

His lips on mine create an explosion that rocks me to my core. I exhale into his mouth in a moan. He runs his hand through my hair then down my body. It wraps around my waist and he lifts, practically tossing me up onto the hotel desk. The lamp shade rattles against the wall. His hands come to my shirt, lifting. Our lips part for a moment, then reconnect with tongues. Wetness pools in my panties, almost soaking them through.

One of his hands comes up to my breast, squeezing it, then finding my nipple and thumbing it over my bra. I sigh happily into his mouth, then fist his shirt in my hand. His shirt joins mine on the floor, then I reach for the button on his pants. It snaps apart easily. I jerk his zipper down until it’s completely open. His cock is hot and seeping in his underwear. I pull back from his mouth, looking down as he unclasps my bra. The straps slack along my arms. He pulls them the rest of the way off, then takes me in.

“Beautiful.” He mumbles, tugging my hips so I slide closer to him on the desk top. “So, so beautiful.” He repeats against the warm skin of my chest. His lips kiss down vertically, until he gets to a tight nipple. He makes eye contact with me as he sucks it into his mouth. His tongue strokes upwards too, making my jaw unhinge for a moment. “You had so much to say earlier, now you’re quiet? Gonna have to change that.” He whispers, then sucks my nipple deep into his mouth, working it over, sending darts of pleasure to my clit. It aches to be touched, missing out on his skilled mouth and fingers.

“Oh.” I pant. He smirks into my breast.

My fingers find the waistband of his underwear, tugging it back from his skin so his cock rises to rest on his belly. His red tip is oozing down the edge of his head. I bite my lip, then my head knocks back into the lamp as his tongue strokes my other nipple into submission.

Fuck, this is incredible. He knows exactly what he is doing. When to push, when to pull away, how to tease and reward. He will be worth any future punishment. My hands shove at the waistbands of his bottom layers until they work down his strong hips. He steps out of them, grabbing a condom in his jean pocket, then kicks them off to the side. I lean back on one palm grinning. He lets me take him in, every delicious curve and edge of his muscular body made perfect from hockey and hard work. His big hands cup my breasts, rolling his thumbs over the stiff peaks in unison.

“Oh that feels sooo good.” I moan appreciatively. I run my free hand through my hair. He watches my face, playing with me more until I am embarrassingly close to coming without him even being inside of me. “I need you to fill me up.”I demand breathlessly. He bites his lip.

“You’re so fucking sexy. You can tell me what to do all night, Emma.”

“Just call me Em.” I laugh. “Emma is so formal.”

“Whatever you want, babe.”

He unbuttons my jeans, then pulls them off my legs. He admires my black, lace panties, seeing the creamy wetness pooling there just for him, then he works them off my body so we are both naked. He picks me up, setting me to the very edge of the desk, then he hands me the condom. I rip the package open with my teeth, gripping the tip, before easing it down his shaft. His eyes close and he sways slightly forward at my hands on him.

He crowds my space, our breath combining together, still smelling like the minimal alcohol we had tonight. One hand goes to my left hip, then the other goes to grip his shaft. He rolls his head through my folds, collecting my soaking juices before he nestles his head at my entrance. Together, we watch him disappear between my swollen lips. He lets out a shaky exhale. He grabs my wrists, putting them on his shoulders, then he lifts me slightly up off the desk, beginning to pump into my pussy.

Tingling explosions burst out down my body. Gooseflesh covers my arms and legs as I take each hard thrust with enthusiastic greed. I kiss along his jaw, grinning at the way I jerk in his arms with each pump. He isn’t handling me like a fragile doll, he is fucking me just like I knew he would. Hard, fast, deep, showing he was built with power and strength for a reason.

“Fuck, Em, your pussy is so good.” He growls into my neck. The sound of skin slapping together increases, becoming disgustingly obvious in the room as he rocks hard into me. “So wet and tight.” He hisses through gritted teeth. My nose bumps into his jaw as I moan on his throat. He turns his face, capturing my lips then fucking up harder and faster into me. My whole body goes tight and rigid, then I fall into my orgasm. Timo fucks me through it, not wavering in his thrusts at all until I collapse onto his chest in surrender. He slows then, kissing my neck as he takes me to the bed. He lays me down, then work himself out of me. I look down at the condom, wondering if we are done.

“Your turn. Show me what you got, Hischier.” I laugh loudly. He sits down on the bed, then falls backwards. He takes my hand in one of his, fingers folding together, helping me maneuver to straddle his lap. I work my hair to one side, then reach behind me to grab his cock in my hand. He hums, then sighs happily as I swallow him whole in one press of my hips. Timo’s eyes literally roll back into his head as I start to move. His hands come behind his head fingers lacing together on the pillow below.

“That’s right. Just lay there princess.” I smirk, throwing my hips back on his cock.

“Funny… gorgeous… talented… where has Nico been hiding you?”

“Practically under your nose.”

“Ah, that’s why I didn’t see it. It’s a little big.” I giggle, then set my hands on his shoulders, rolling my hips.

“Ooo. You know how to fuck.” He praises me. “So good….” He bites his lip, exhaling heavily. “Little more, gorgeous.” He encourages. I comply and he groans. “Mmmm.” His hands snap away from the back of his head. He grips my hips, feeling the roll of them on him. Then two fingers find my clit. I shutter. His other hand comes to my breast, pinching my nipple. “Fuck me until you cum.” He whispers. I moan shakily, then keep bucking my hips down into him. When he senses I am about to release, he works his hips up in little thrusts to help me over the edge.

“Oh!” I cry out, pinching my other nipple.

He gently eases me down, pulling his feet up closer to his butt so his thighs create support for my back. I slump into them. I pant, looking at him on the pillow as he smirks.

“Shit.” I hiss as he forces his cock up deep into me, lifting my weight with his hips like it’s nothing.

“Doggy?” He asks, wiggling his large eyebrows. I nod eagerly.

I’ve never come so hard or had so much fun with a one night stand before. Usually, it’s awkward, bumping into each other and trying to find the right tempo. Not with Timo. It truly feels like we were made for each other. Gone is the insecure way I try to move my body so my partner can see the best angles. Usually, I stay away from doggy. But I am desperate to feel the hard slapping of his balls against my clit.

We both stand. Timo kisses me, tongues flirting within my mouth. Our lips are puffy and red by the time we pull apart. He twists my hips, working his cock between my legs as I bend over in front of him. He lines his latex covered head with my entrance, then pulls me back on his dick. We both groan loudly this time, appreciating the stretch and arousal of each other.

“Gonna be dreaming about this pussy tonight.” He groans, starting to buck his hips again. The delicious slapping has me deliriously groping the bed sheets. His thick cock crams into me thrust after thrust, feeling like he is rearranging my internal organs. A big hand comes to the back of my neck, forcing me down. I groan loudly, shrieking an inhale at how good this angle feels.

“Please.” I hear myself beg.

“Please what, baby?”

“Please make me cum. Please. More. Um! That! Yeah!” I yelp out as his hips snap harder into me. My ass shakes with his powerful thrusts. I turn my face into the comforter, then scream hard into it as a powerful orgasm grips my core and turns me inside out.

“Fuck… I’m gonna cum. Feels so fucking good when you cum.” I shake against his thighs as he finishes in the condom. His hand releases from the back of my neck. He grips the edge of the condom then works his way out of me. Wordlessly, he heads to the bathroom, striping himself and cleaning off. I collapse forward into the bed sheets, curling into the fetal position while my heavy breathing continues. Timo brings a towel back with him, tossing it to me. Afterwards, I throw it onto the floor while he lays back next to me in bed.

“Good job.” I murmur, holding my hand up. He slaps it firmly, then sighs happily.

“That was amazing.” He turns to look at me when he says it. I nod, meeting his gaze. “Any chance you’re available for more of that this summer?”

“No strings?”

“No strings.” He agrees.

“Then yeah. I’m available.” He chuckles.

“We make a good team, tho. Damn.” He rubs a hand over his head. He turns his wrist, looking at the time on his expensive, silver watch. “I gotta go. It’s almost curfew.”

“Yeah, I want to go to sleep.” I admit, stretching out, pushing at his thigh under the covers to move him off the bed. He dramatically rolls off like I kicked him full on. I giggle as he rests his chin on the bed from the floor. His blue eyes soak me up. His hand comes up, poking at my left cheek.

“Your dimples are cute.”

“Thank you.” I murmur.

“How long are you here?”

“Wanna see me again already?” He laughs.

“Yeah. Sex that great is rare. I want you again tomorrow.” Butterflies erupt in my stomach. I roll my bottom lip in my mouth, watching him pull his clothes back on. His last article is the Team Switzerland sweatshirt he zips up to the middle of his chest.

“Okay.” I agree. He smiles gently, then walks towards me.

He kneels one knee on the bed, hovering over the body he wrecked tonight. He kisses me quick, then pulls away. He smells seductive and sultry, like his expensive cologne and me.

“Sweet dreams.” He whispers.

“Goodnight.” I respond. He walks out of the room, closing the door softly during his exit.

I roll onto my back, staring up at the ceiling above me. The butterflies in my stomach expand up into my chest until it feels crammed full. I put my hand over my face, watching back the reel of the night against my black eyelids, ending with the mutual agreement of more.

More this weekend. More even this off-season too. More, more, more because it will be months before I will have had my fill of him.

I’m not sure how we will make it all work. Sneaking around once is one thing, but doing it continuously is another.

I guess this planner is going to have to figure it out.

Because It’s going to be a long, hot summer with Timo Meier.

More Timo and Emma can be found here.

#tm: loving & leaving #Timo Meier x oc #timo meier smut #Timo Meier imagine #hockey fan fiction #nhl fan fiction

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skinnypaleangryperson · 3 months

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Feeling strange because I'm pretty sure that the next time I sit down to write and work on my stories tomorrow I'm officially going to be done with my 20 million plus or narrative of the BoJack Horseman fanfiction I started writing I think 3 years ago and worked on everyday since, which has been the biggest and most complex spiritual profound in a journey that I think I've ever gone on in my entire life, and I've never discovered so much about myself neither as a creative or as a person until I started writing it after the experience BoJack has a character gave me.

It's strange because an American society if you're just a nobody that's creating things, especially fanfiction, people will either ignore you or insult you, and that goes for literally every platform in existence with no relief from it. I know that the story that I've created will never receive anything but apathy from every person and every community that will ever exist have best, and it deranged morbid insults at worst as has been the case with the entirety of the journey of writing this.

But I'm so happy, and I'm more content and more confident and fulfilled within myself and I've ever been in my entire life, despite the fact that I also feel like I've completely lost my mind from the individuality that I've learned and from the experiences I've had solely from my creativity and the extensions of the worlds I've created.

I know I'm not the only person on here that's creating entire worlds and emotions and feelings only to be completely ignored. It's just the way that things are. I feel like I'm living a completely split identity, one for the people around me (both for real life and online communities), and one for the person that I actually am going the person that I wish that I could be if people cared about it or if people were wired to care about something other than what they've been molded to only care about within the superficiality of the way that people think and are. This goes for both real life and online life, there's no difference, and I'm literally forced to put on a performance between the person that I actually am, a profoundly passionate storyteller, and the person that realizes that those things don't matter to literally anyone on this earth, and having to be able to accept putting on the performance of person people will ever respond to.

It's a profoundly lonely existence, to be a genuine creative person and to write and to create every single day, to have profoundly complex interimagined experiences that cannot be found in officially published consumption. But as lonely and as disorienting as it is I wouldn't trade the experience for anything. Not a single thing. Finding my own inner voice as a creative has changed everything about the way that I view the world and how I navigate the day-to-day life of myself and the people around me. The blackest part about it is that I've developed a disdain for 99% of people because I've realized that they were never care about the true genuine imagination in of who I actually am and I will be forced to put on a mask if I ever want a relationship or a sense of community with anyone, and I'm looking at a very dull disorienting performance of an existence to appease my need for human connection even if it's only fake tolerance at best.

But I can't change the way that people think. I certainly can't change the way that the only respond to things that are officially published for them to consume that they are assumed the only things that are worth paying attention to. If my own family cares more about celebrities and TV shows more than they care about their own daughter's projects, of course I can ever expect a partner, friends, or a community to ever care.

I'll always have my muses themselves, and the profound in our life in and of itself of an experienced, and I will continue to live an entire world that is apparently only for me, that will only exist, as the entirety of my existence has really only been experienced by me in all of its resounding complexity, and magic, and experience and will continue to be so. I will continue to see what nobody else sees, and I will continue to have a rich life for it.

Congratulations to Bojack And His Wife being completed, a 20 million word romantic fantasy philosophical narrative.

#bojack #living in my own personal version of Hollywood here

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shock · 3 months

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"Don't just play—do something!", Jack Abele, 01.21.24.

This is a companion piece to the collage I made about moving into the first place that felt like my home back in '21 (shown below). They have matching frames and are displayed together above our dining table! This second piece is a reflection on how my relationship to "home" has evolved since then, especially after proposing to my now fiancé last month. I'm really proud of it!

Text transcript:

FOR YOUR EYES ONLY

In the cold, thin clouds of interstellar space, written in the precise message of starlight:

What made you so interested in fireflies?

Imagine that they propel the environment into play: they STAND OUT, add color, chaos, curves moving behind and below, inside, outward along feedback loops, perplexing positive panic persuaded to make another form of animal art.

Love is a Many-Splendored Thing, a beautiful structure, flamboyantly scuzzy, sassy, a full bouquet of many wild ideas — a dazzling interplay between lightness and unclarity, trying things out, fancy, whimsical records looped with webs, half-truth surface textures composed of swirls within swirls, a performance of information, scene-setting details with many impressive, more tongue-in-cheek, unforeseeable aspects relatively stable and evolving at the same time.

Distinctly transitional.

The trouble with love is it's hard to describe in simple and consistent words. Beyond the jolting familiarity of self-similar, self-referential tessellating hues, the little comedy-drama fictions... you see openness, possibilities toward change; our very existence together antidote to the dull grind of the paradox that we live every moment in an indifferent universe yet having so much fun with friends, local communities, places, faces, even muddy bog holes.

Music! A Tribe Called Quest, The Beastie Boys, The Breeders, Nick Cave, Nine Inch Nails, Soundgarden, Santana and Crosby, Stills, and Nash, mud-caked at Woodstock, picking up Space Age scrap, cutting collaged paper, playing with magical little lights, heretically evolving in this meaningless, magnificent place fine-tuned just right to allow for life, love, and grunge to exist nevertheless.

Maybe what keeps me here, making art, is how beautiful it is for optimism to become the first expression of hope despite danger amid the disparate depth of our universe created by chaos.

Movement characterizes my "youthful, dynamic" journey, escapes to infinite other places somewhere else, afraid of considering complicated survival long-term, wherein risk is worth the reward. But something about your windy city reminded me what strange, cascading effects the fingers of two hands form together, intersect one another, interfere with fate, interlace like light radiating rays woven, at certain points, into dynamic singularities.

Mutualism is a happy hybrid of symmetry and chaos — a relationship, it's like the entire forest is blinking in sync.

Just as the fun is to make up a great story, the writer in me calls this piece, "Don't just play— do something!"

This time around, living offers a profound pivot from playing a game. Today we confront as animals, we're not far from dogs, domesticated punks at heart, manifold.

I am humbled, exhilarated, afraid yet strangely calm and clear "On Bended Knee"

(The term ground seems inapt.)

...Nor is it possible to describe...

The closest feeling to being the world itself? It is to have loved someone so much that you wanted to spend the rest of your lifetime with them, with each other.

We're writing a book. Adding a stroke of paint and words to illustrate what we became, a bright third dimension that can be seen from space to meet the generations to come, to simulate the uncountable whimsies they could achieve.

The mind already knows before the key touches the lock.

To watch firefly swarms with a mangy mutt.

That must be quite a sight to see.

BECAUSE THEY EXIST

NOWHERE ELSE ON EARTH.

#collage art #my collages #my art #collage poetry

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lelanida · 1 year

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In light of the fact that the theory that Aurora is a Megabird has become popular in the fandom, I came to express my own opinion on this. I am not questioning that Aurora is a deity (this is obvious), I am only questioning that she is powerful enough to be a force that rotates the universe. And so let's figure it out in order:

1. ORBrora

Our brains all exploded when suddenly Aurora covered the Colosseum with her power and transported us to some other place. It also exploded for me, but when I put it back together by the middle of the song, I began to think about how she did it. And the game itself gave us the answer. Bubble.

The same bubble that she creates before the start of each song.

Her power is limited on the outside, but inside the orb built by her voice, she creates reality herself. So during "Runaway" she showed us the Isle of Dawn even before it became a desert, because this is how she saw it, and this is how it looked in the time of Alef. In fact, we did not leave the Colosseum, otherwise how can we explain that we never moved during the entire concert, although it would seem that we flew half the world. Aurora only takes our mind on a journey while the body remains in still.

Inside the bubble, she is god, and this smoothly takes us to the next argument.

2. Color theory.

Someday I will explain how such a distribution of colors goes into the roots of the lore, and explains the reason why the Storm started and why Skykids are powerless in front of it. But we have come to talk about Aurora and her divine origin.

Yellow is the color of light, the color of a Megabird. And everything that came from her has a yellow accent on it. Well:

What color is Aurora in her bubble?

Boom. Megabird.

What color is Aurora in reality?

Boom. Classic spirit.

What color is Aurora in its true form?

Bo-what?

Yellow is not completely gone. Only half. No other spirit has a yellow color (and a divine form). So Aurora stands above simple spirits. Even above the constellations guides. But then who the hell is she???

Here is my answer:

Aurora is a guide for us Skykids.

No, well, you judge for yourself.

1. The symbol of Aurora is golden wings. What does it mean? The symbol of the season always has a special connection with its participants. But no one except Aurora has wings.

And now remember where else we have seen similar wings.

Does it look similar? But that's not all.

2. Aurora can talk to us.

In all of history, only the Little Prince could talk to us. Because he's our friend. Does this mean that Aurora is also our friend. That's what it means. But what distinguishes her from Prince is that she seems to be able to understand us. She calls the Skykids to dialogue. And if she really understands our speech, then that makes her the ONLY character capable of it. It seems she has a special connection with the Skykids. She knows who we are, about our mission and how it will end. She has seen the Orbit and is able to rebuild it in her simulation. Moreover, it takes us to the real Orbit. She is the voice that greets us at the beginning of our journey and she also guides us to its end. She is our guide. It is not for nothing that we are told this phrase at the beginning of the game:

3. The essence of the Skykids.

Skykids are sensitive to sounds. They do not know how to write, read, draw, but they know musical notation from birth and are able to use various musical instruments. That's why we follow the ringing of the bells, and Aurora calls us with her voice (both in seasonal quests and at a concert). Skykids love music. And Aurora seems to know that.

And that we have:

Mega Bird is the patron saint of nature and animals.

Aurora is the mentor of the Skykids.

"But how is that? We can't have two gods of light!"

How not? How can it not be, my dear ones?! When in the season of Shattering we were confirmed that there were TWO MEMORIES on the side of the light!

It was right under our noses, and we didn't pay attention to it! And if you look at the trees of the essences of light from the season, you will notice that one of them is longer than the other. So one of the entities is more powerful.

That's my verdict. Aurora is not a Megabird, but an ally of Megabird. She also has a certain power, but she is weaker than the main god of light. And she's also a great singer. It's all. Thank you all for reading this.

#sky children of the light #thatskygame #sky cotl #season of aurora #sorry if there are grammar mistakes 😔

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shadyvoxtruth · 4 months

Text

How ShadyVox Threatened Myself & Others For Years

My name is Martin Billany but I am also known as LittleKuriboh in the YouTube sphere/Yu-Gi-Oh fandom.

I am posting this here for posterity in case all of my other posts elsewhere about it are removed. Also because there has never been a single unified place to find all of this information presented in sequence.

Patrick, also known by his pseudonyms of ShadyVox or Scratch21's Matt Robinson or Blake Swift, spent the better part of 2019-2023 both threatening me and manipulating a group of real victims.

A brief history - for those who don't know, Patrick/ShadyVox and myself were heavily involved in the "abridged series" world in the late 2000s/mid 2010s. I myself started the whole abridged parody nonsense with Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged, and Patrick would follow suit by doing a Yu-Gi-Oh GX Abridged. We met through content creation and formed a friendship through it. Not best friends or anything, but friendly enough.

Patrick would later leave the abridged series stuff behind and start over making music, working in original animation for popular internet channels, etc. Stuff he was genuinely very good at. It was a strong choice to move away from parody content, as it likely would have held him back at some point.

At a certain point in 2018, I received a communication from him that requested I remove certain YouTube comments on my videos that featured him. These comments were demanding to know why Patrick was following various right wing channels and were calling him alt-right, etc.

I agreed to remove the comments because I considered him a friend and automatically assumed there was some big misunderstanding. As it turned out, he was subscribed to a few channels that caused me to confront him.

I was emotional and upset, admittedly. Things politically were at a fever pitch and I had been swept up by it. I have included screencaps of our conversation.

Later I would apologize to him for my outburst and try to make amends. You're probably wondering why I would include this since it doesn't seem to involve Patrick threatening me, and it seems if anything to suggest I got upset at him.

That is because I truly believe this is the moment Patrick decided he was going to find some way to come after me. I believe that Patrick had spent a lot of time creating a mask for himself, and had worn it very well, and the moment someone saw through it for even a moment he decided I had to be dealt with somehow.

At this point - mid 2018 - Patrick and I were not close. We hadn't worked on anything together in half a decade. We really only kept in touch in a cursory fashion. So I imagine this interaction stuck in Patrick's craw something awful.

I was, however, closer with the person Patrick had worked in conjunction with on his abridged series, X. These days X is my best friend. Back then, I don't know how close we were. But definitely closer than either of us were with Patrick.

One day in 2019, entirely out of the blue, Patrick messages me privately to inform me that X once slept with a girl who was 17 when he was in his early 20s.

My own spouse was sexually assaulted before I met them, and as a result I have a no tolerance policy on anything that even could resemble assault. So I immediately ended my friendship with X.

And as I was doing so, Patrick told me repeatedly that I was overreacting.

As you can see, by Patrick/Shady's own words, this was a long time ago. Just under a decade or so, by my count.

And most importantly, Patrick had been aware of this for the whole decade or so and chose this very moment to tell me that this happened.

I want you to keep that in mind, especially the fact that when I said I was ending my friendship with X, Patrick's actual response was "it was a long time ago, he's gotten better."

It was painful to end my friendship with X, but I did. I told him that if he could provide satisfactory proof that what Patrick had said didn't represent the facts of the situation, I could be his friend again. Until then, I cut off all communication from X.

A week or so later I received specific evidence that pointed to a situation wherein Patrick was intentionally misrepresenting what happened, or the alleged victim's story. The alleged victim VERY specifically disagreed with Patrick.

You'll note that I'm not including screen caps of these conversations - that is because the alleged victim, and other involved parties, DO NOT WANT to be part of any of this and have needed actual therapy because of Patrick's behavior in the past. Not just here.

Anyway.

I returned to Patrick/Shady and told him there had been a misunderstanding. I wanted to clear the air and give him a chance to say something along the lines of "oh okay, obviously I had my facts wrong." I mean, as you yourself have just read - he said himself that this was a long time ago. Maybe he got some wires crossed.

This is how Patrick actually responded:

The screenshots were taken on different dates, hence why his twitter icon looks different suddenly.

But yes. His response to me explaining that the alleged victim disagreed with his stance, was to insist that the alleged victim must be lying and that I should be absolutely infuriated.

After he'd tried to tell me that there was no point in being upset about this information that he had sat on for the better part of a decade.

Patrick continued to scream at me via dm, repeatedly requesting that I give him my phone number so we could talk about this. I assume this is because he didn't want any kind of text evidence of what he was going to say to me, or what he was doing.

He would later, mid-conversation, tell me that he was deleting all of his dms to me. Not sure why. It doesn't remove them from my side of the conversation, so I still have access to all of them. I have not shared the entire private message thread yet, because it's sensitive and involves people beyond just myself. But if the dms ever do need to be made public entirely, I have them.

I ended up blocking Patrick during this very conversation because he had begun screaming at me, behaving extremely unhinged and in a frightening manner. I honestly think he had hoped that I would initially try to defend my friend from his accusation, in which case he was going to fly off the handle then. But because I had genuinely believed him and removed my friend from my life, only to then learn Patrick's story didn't hold water, he had no choice but to lash out now. When it didn't make any sense to suddenly be irate about a thing he had told me about, and had literally just said "it was a long time ago."

Within 24 hours, Patrick had sent me a threatening email saying he was going to expose me for everything I was doing. I have attached the highlights of the email, parts that don't involve other people's names.

Some of the references in this email - specifically about how I've associated with others and ignored people calling me out for it - are related to a podcast I was on, alongside Patrick. Until recently I had indeed tried to move on with my life after a number of the people involved had revealed themselves to be toxic. I had made efforts to separate myself from those people. It had been years since I'd really had any direct connection to any of them.

I do indeed regret not speaking out about it sooner.

Having said this, Patrick himself was equally as guilty for not speaking out - and had in fact spent a significantly larger amount of time talking to/working with the people in question.

As such, I believe a lot of this is some form of bizarre projection on his part.

I ignored the email because I was a) worried that he had suddenly snapped, and b) I didn't think any of the content warranted a response.

A day later, I received this email from Patrick where his tone has changed entirely:

As you can see, this is more in line with the reality of the situation. He is apologizing profusely and insisting I didn't actually do anything wrong, and that he was the one in the wrong.

You'll also note that he signs this particular email "Patrick." That is because it is his real name, and I believe he was possibly appealing to my humanity and the part of me that might still have seen a friendship worth salvaging. Otherwise I could not tell you why he signed his real name - he typically hates using it.

I still did not reply because at this point I was confused and scared and wanted him to leave me alone. And to that point, he had specifically stated at the end of his email that he was the problem and he would not "involve himself in my life any longer."

The police were contacted and they told him to stop. I had hoped that my part in all of this was over.

Later that very month, Patrick announced on his ShadyVox twitter account that a new GX Abridged was coming out for April Fools.

When it is posted on April 1st - less than a month after he had sent his email saying he would remove himself from my life, and not long after the police have visited him - the video contains many references to our conversations, and specifically the fact that the police got involved.

Yes, after being told by the police to stop - and after writing an email that insisted he knew he was the real problem and would be getting help - he decides to make a mockery of the situation publicly, in a manner that nobody else will understand. Except the people it is targeting.

The tweets about this video are the only thing remaining on Patrick's twitter account, as he had purged it some time ago.

(An aside - I do recall someone attempting to call Patrick out for being toxic previously on twitter, and his response was to spam them with the words "PROVE IT. PROVE IT. PROVE IT." until they gave up. I would include screenshots of this, but like I said - he purged his entire twitter except for this specific GX Abridged video he'd thrown together in a week to respond to the fact that the authorities had intervened to get him to stop)

One other important element of this video - which is where, I believe, this whole thing veers into genuinely disturbing territory - is that it is interspersed with garbled footage intended to look like some sort of creepypasta/vhs effect. At the end of the GX Abridged video, it is clear that Patrick is using this video to allude to some upcoming song tracks he is producing.

Songs that are tailored to threaten me in cryptic, indirect ways that very few people pick up on.

But I'll get to those later.

During 2019, Patrick reaches out to actual victims of the toxic individuals from the podcast I used to be on more than half a decade before any of the stuff chronologized in this post. He tells them lies, and demonizes me to the point that it convinces them that I am still both defending/supporting the toxic individuals, and actively mocking their victims in private.

I am aware of this because Patrick tweets about it - before deleting the tweets entirely. He even attempts to throw popular abridging group TeamFourStar under the bus, which I assume was merely out of spite because they had absolutely nothing to do with any of this.

I wish I had screengrabbed the tweets when they were still up, but there is still remaining evidence that they did exist.

Here is someone posting on Reddit about it - he only references one tweet, but this was around the time Patrick was posting and then immediately deleting what he'd said. I honestly can only assume - but I think he was fishing for people to latch on to what he was saying and contact him privately.

Not to mention the fact that the police had specifically told him to stop, so that was likely in the back of his mind also.

Here is someone replying to a since suspended twitter account that was discussing what Patrick was saying about TeamFourStar. Obviously I have no clear way to prove it, but please know that I have no reason to make that much up and point to a random ass tweet.

I imagine Patrick (not the suspended person in the above screencap) realized the best way to not seem directly to blame or involved at all was to remove any and all posts he'd made. Admittedly it would have worked if I didn't have the dms and these emails.

Speaking of emails, I received a third one in late 2019 - as you can see, Patrick's promise of leaving me alone forever didn't even last a year.

You'll note that he's speaking as though the second email never even happened. He's also just plain lying through his teeth for a significant part of it, but I think it's most important to note that this email requires you to assume the second email never got written.

He has gone from pages and pages of "of course it wasn't your fault, I'm the problem, you're good, I'm bad" to "I told you..."

Also, I think the words "You tried to damage me" should be highlighted here as it reinforces my theory that all of this was about me insulting him for all the right wing channels he'd subscribed to. Which, to me, was barely even a thought in my mind at this point.

So I choose to ignore this email also. Because y'know, why would I even humor responding to the guy at this point? I decide that I will only speak on any of this if it becomes public conversation. Until then, anything that happens would be because of Patrick's actions.

I do let my friends know about all of this - including TeamFourStar, who through this entire thing have been blameless and didn't even do anything to Patrick to begin with. And every time Patrick does something, I make sure people in my circle are aware and to be cautious.

Meanwhile Patrick alludes to all of this indirectly in the songs he posts to his YouTube channel. Yes, a situation that involves actual victims and one alleged victim that Patrick hadn't spoken to in years. He chose to make reference to all of this in videos where he raps, amongst other things.

There are a number of songs that feature references to this, it's mainly these two that I want to focus on

Birdy Boy is a song that is explicitly referencing Patrick's issues with me, without actually going into any details about what the issue is.

It is so clearly about me that people pick up on it - and rather than confront the issue or have a dialogue, Patrick decides to pin the comment about it to the top of the comments page.

Of course, if Patrick made any attempt to directly describe the issue or explain himself, it would likely result in the police becoming involved once again.

So he sticks to singing about the whole thing.

This next song is the most upsetting one.

Patrick/Shady writes a song called "Joker" about a psychotic individual murdering someone who "used to be funny." This is, specifically, the song that he teases at the end of the GX Abridged Episode 21 video he posted earlier in 2019 for april fools.

He has teased it multiple times on his twitter, and elsewhere, with the words "Coming Soon." The very same words he used to title his third threatening email.

Here is the email, placed next to some lyrics from the song Joker.

He is seemingly very specifically trying to threaten me without anyone noticing, in plain sight. I was unable to watch the video in full until after all of this stuff came out into the public. It was only through reading people's responses and the lyrics that I realized what he was doing.

Again, at this point I am doing and saying nothing publicly. Just watching this behavior and waiting.

Meanwhile in 2021, a videogame based on the web series TOME gets fully funded and Christopher Niosi - the creator of TOME - reaches out to the voice cast to see if they'll return. I myself was the voice of Nylocke, one of the main characters, and Patrick was the voice of THE main character.

As such, I told Christopher no and explained my reasons.

And here is Christopher's response.

Please pay careful attention to the fact that Christopher Niosi flat out says he already knew Patrick was doing this stuff - it isn't just me imagining it.

As a result of this interaction, I do not reprise my role as Nylocke and Christopher Niosi chooses to just recast every single character. Please note that he could have just recast Patrick, but did not. As a result, I feel responsible for all of the original cast losing out on work. It hurts to think about. But at least I feel like I did the right thing.

One member of the TOME production staff takes it upon themselves to reach out to Patrick personally. They discover that he is planning to write more songs/raps that target me. They ask him nicely to stop. He insists that he has to do this. Y'know, make vague allusions to extremely sensitive topics that he lied about in the form of song. Has to do it.

The member of production staff tells Patrick he should seek professional help.

Patrick ignores them.

Patrick continues to engage in behavior that, while not openly hostile or even specifically targeting anyone, is very clearly intended as mockery at best and a threat at worst until 2023 when all of this comes to a head.

In August of 2023, the real victims that Patrick has manipulated make a callout post aimed at myself and TeamFourStar. It specifically cites Patrick's testimony and the songs he has posted. They have been misled, but their anger is understandable.

Within a week, it becomes apparent to all sides that this is Patrick's fault. The person who posted the callout takes it down and apologizes to everyone. Not just me. They apologize to TeamFourStar, and to X.

And only then do I speak publicly about what Patrick has been doing.

I share all of the screencaps I've posted here, and give context. It's all a little muddled as at the time, my cat was dying of terminal cancer and so all of my posts are somewhat scatterbrained and aren't in chronological order. But it's still remarkably clear to everyone that Patrick has manipulated this whole thing, starting in 2019.

And that's only the stuff I feel comfortable sharing.

Since the callout post first dropped in 2023 and I began pointing people's attention toward Patrick, Patrick himself has been entirely silent. He has dropped off the internet with nary a word in defense. Not a single person directly associated with what happened has attempted to dispute my description of events.

This isn't my word versus his. It is my word versus silence.

I have it on good authority that Patrick is alive and well. I am grateful for that much. My attempts have not been to hurt him, but to defend myself. My efforts have not been to hunt him down and crucify him, but to make people aware of what transpired - and what could have easily been undone by Patrick/Shady just choosing to stop.

Instead a number of victims, and people who never did a thing, experienced a considerable amount of trauma as a result of his thoughtless and spiteful actions.

Patrick is a remarkably talented individual, and it makes me sad I have to be the one to show people who he is. I genuinely think all of this could have been avoided. It's so meaningless. It's just pain on top of pain.

And Patrick stood in the center of it all, not just pulling people's strings but practically uprooting them and then acting like he didn't do a thing.

I'm not expecting an apology, and I'm not asking for his cancelation, whatever shape that would take. But I do think it's important that people know this happened, that he chose this.

He did this for almost no reason to a person he considered a friend, who worked on videos with him.

It just seems like the responsible thing, to make sure people are somewhat aware that he could do this to them if they aren't cautious and careful and super aware.

I'm sorry to anyone disappointed and hurt by all of this information.

Believe me, I understand.

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