#like. a year ago. anyways our situation is VERY complicated but yeah. he has been in love with me for like years at this point. and im

[misfortunegirl]

i don't think i have an issue recognizing what emotion is what except for like that *very* specific sinking feeling i have in my stomach that just. makes me want to just throw up and puke and explode and implode and and and----

#i hate feeling things because when i do its always to the max and my body feels it way too much too. hell on earth #anyways im preeeetty sure what im feeling is sort of like anxiety? but worse. because i cant even pinpoint what exactly out of every shitty #thing in my life is making me feel this way. grrr. anyways i r #i am kindof lonely but for like a very specific person #ita becaise they are usually always available and respond quick but now theyre on a vacation #and they left their phone cause rhey went to the beach . and i didnt realize just how much i depended on them up until now. ohhh brother. #well anyways for those who have been with me since the beginning of this blog. well its **that** person. yes the guy who broke up with me #like. a year ago. anyways our situation is VERY complicated but yeah. he has been in love with me for like years at this point. and im #Men.......Tally! eel. and also. yeah whatever other stuff up with me. so.yeah. #cant really explaun it. but. things are avril lavigne' complicated-coded Basically. #anyways at least one mans madly inlove with me #*side eyeing one bitch in particular* #/⁠╲⁠/⁠\⁠╭⁠(⁠•⁠‿⁠•⁠)⁠╮⁠/⁠\⁠╱⁠\

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

Hi can I have some advice?? In a little bit of a pickle rn.

So basically, I identify as aroace (like no attraction whatsoever end of both spectrums). My best friend, who we'll call S for the sake of making it easier, is somewhere on the spectrum (I don't remember where rn but it's not very important to the story). We have a mutual friend, A, who is allo. The three of us have been friends since around 3rd grade, and have gotten a lot closer due to sharing more classes over the past year or so. They're both lovely people.

Now, the problem arose a few days ago, when we were riding back from somewhere we'd gone for S's birthday together. It was cold, and because of where we'd gone I'd dressed up in a cape. So I put my arm and the cape over A's shoulder, so he wasn't cold and also because it was kinda funny. We joked around, I sent a selfie of us to the gc the three of us have captioned "No Hetero" (because I'm female and A's male, it was meant to be an adaptation of "No Homo"). All normal things.

Later that night, when I'm at home, S sends me this text:

"Hey uh

I don't want you to tell [A] or make hints bout it or anything

But he likes you now"

We talked, she told me that she told him I'm aroace (which, while technically outing me, I didn't mind because I trust them both and I'd sent the flag in the gc that night so he would've figured it out with a quick google search anyways), and said she'd tried her best to explain. Meanwhile, A is texting me saying that he's sad (I'd asked how he was doing after he asked me), and responding "I found out something really disappointing and discouraging abt a friend" and saying that "it's really private, sorry" when I pressed for more. Which I'm almost 100% sure is about me.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I love them both (/p) and I don't want our relationship to change at all. And so far it hasn't, but I can tell A's more down than usual now. I don't want to break my promise about talking about it to S, beside I don't really want to discuss it unless I have to and A doesn't know I know, but I also don't want to feel like I'm walking on eggshells. I'm so scared of losing my friendships to romance, and this just happened in the middle of a really big and stressful life event for me.

So far things are staying the same, and I'm really hopeful it continues that way. But I'm also very aware that we'll probably have to talk about it at some point, because it has definitely shifted our relationship, at least internally.

Idk, something about knowing that a friend had/has a crush on me completely changes my worldview. Before I was scared of losing friends because society has made us believe that friends and family are second to s/o. And while I do still fear that, I just realized that it's actually possible for this to happen where I'm the "s/o", and after someone gets rejected or breaks up, it's not common (at least in media) to see them just chilling as friends again.

So, yeah. That's the situation, if anyone has any sort of advice, I would be very grateful.

-Raven (signing in case of future updates)

These situations are definitely complicated. It does sound like A developed some feelings and is disappointed those feelings can't be reciprocated. Even though no one did anything wrong, it can still be hard to deal with a situation like this. I'd recommend taking your cues from A. So for example if A pretended that it wasn't the situation with you he was disappointed by, I'd take that as a sign he doesn't currently want to talk about it. But there may come a time in the future he does want to discuss it, or does want to talk about you being aroace, and I'd talk about it then. Sometimes people need a bit of time to deal with hurting feelings, and sometimes when that hurt subsides a bit, they may or may not want to talk and clear the air.

Similarly, sometimes in these situations, the person who caught feelings may want a bit of space to deal with those feelings. If this happens, it doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't want to be friends anymore, so don't panic. And give him whatever space he asks for, but make it clear you still care a lot about him.

Situations like these are going to be more up to A how things turn out, but the best thing you can do to preserve the friendship is just keep being A's friend. Be there for him, listen to him, etc.

Beware treating media like real life. I know of lots of real life examples where someone caught feelings for someone that weren't reciprocated, or dated someone and they broke up, and they stayed friends. These things depend a lot more on individual personality and what kind of dynamic the people involved have than anything else. And when rejection comes because the other person just isn't attracted to their gender, while it's not 100%, people do tend to be forgiving because it's not personal at all.

Remember too that you didn't do anything in this particular situation. You didn't cause him to be attracted to you, it's all just chance. And I'm sure A recognizes that too, so be careful you're not beating yourself up at all over this. Just do your best to be a supportive friend, and I think that's really all you can do in these types of situations.

All the best and good luck, Anon!

[hawkstincan]

I haven't been here a lot lately — and won’t be for some time — because the last couple of years were… Hard.

You know what’s bad about having close aged pets? They are getting old. And they die. And you have very little time to cope.

Tiger died in the middle of September. He lived with me longer than my parents. I’ve never had favorites. I love all my cats. But Tiger was special. He loved hugs. He slept on my pillow, on my neck, on my head, under the duvet. He was the cuddliest cat ever. Tactile, kind, he loved people and people loved him.

His passing was devastating, cause we at first went to a not so good vet. They misdiagnosed him. They insisted on prolonging treatment which wasn’t working. I felt like I was torturing him. He was in pain and I was giving him pills from which he was only more uncomfortable. So I found another clinic where we got an accurate diagnoses. It was bad. I heard the confirmation: Tiger was suffering for nothing. There was nothing that could be done at this point. Euthanasia was a humane choice.

I thought I had some time to grieve before the next loss. But nope. Couple days later I noticed a lump on Locha’s jaw. And just like that all hopes are gone. Locha is 18,5 too. They were born in February 2004. Locha is the last one still alive. Last piece of my childhood family. I don’t know how to live without them. It just feels so damn wrong. Locha is a special snowflake. He was skittish for the most of his life. Like yeah, human, you can try to pet me, but don’t you think I would sit on your lap. No-ope. You must prove yourself worthy of the honor of petting. When he climbed on my lap for the first time I was so shocked and happy that I cried. Just a little, but cried anyway. And it wasn’t so long ago. Three or four years.

So after finding a lump we went to the vet. They sent us to an oncologist. I was afraid that we may end up with money hunting again. I feared an oncologist would insist on an operation and biopsy (which is pricey and pointless in our situation). Thanks fuck that wasn’t the case! Oncologist was quite understanding. She pointed out that at his age removal of the lower jaw wasn’t reasonable. (It’s rather questionable at a younger age too imo. You can’t make your cat understand WHY they lost such an important part of their body.) And hence no removal you don’t really need to put him through biopsy. We decided to go with supportive therapy. He’s eating on his own, he’s drinking. He wants his petting sessions. He is still his grumpy old self. Thinner than he was, but not that bad yet.

Only this damn tumor is growing too freaking quickly. He can’t eat solid food now. Only muss. And it’s getting much more complicated with pills. If the pill brushes the inner part of the tumor it starts to bleed. And yep. I have photos and it looks rather creepy if you ask me.

I have no idea how long he’ll survive like this. It’s not something anyone can predict or guarantee. I just know that he has less than a year. Maybe even less than a month. And there is nothing more I can do. Only to let him go when the time comes.

So… I’m a mess. I am tired. I lost two of my cats in 2019, I lost my dog in 2020, Tiger and Tiny got ill in 2021, I lost Tiger in September. And I’ll soon lose Locha. Next year, if we are lucky but soon nevertheless. It’s inevitable. And I’m just falling to pieces. This is too much.

(Cherry on the top — i got into fight with both mom and dad and they told me that I'm no longer a daughter to them. And told to go fuck myself, so yeah. Healthy family.)

I’ll return when I’ll feel more like a human than a pile of shit.

Locha being cute, instead of grumpy

#long post #irl #sad #pets death #heavy topics #sensitive content #whining #sorta #i'm a mess #i'm exhausted

[osakaso5]

IDOLiSH7 6th Anniversary Special Story: Full of Heart...

Chapter 1: The Greatest Show

Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6

Mister Shimooka: The day has finally come for Rabitty-kun, beloved children's character, to celebrate its 6th anniversary with a special show!

Mister Shimooka: Welcome to Kids' Room!

Mister Shimooka: And as we look back on our own childhoods with Toi Toi Toi Company's famous mascot...

Mister Shimooka: We'll also take a peek at the childhoods of idols whose fame rivals even that of Rabitty-kun!

Audience: Kyaaaaa...!

Mister Shimooka: Here come our special guests!

Mister Shimooka: Re:vale!

Yuki: Hey there.

Momo: I hope you're excited for our baby pics!

Audience: Kyaaaaa..!

Mister Shimooka: TRIGGER!

Tenn Kujo: Thank you for having us on.

Gaku Yaotome: Thanks. Let's regain some of our childhood innocence, yeah?

Ryunosuke Tsunashi: I hope you're all ready!

Audience: Kyaaaaa..!

Mister Shimooka: IDOLiSH7!

Iori Izumi: I'm a bit embarrassed to show you all my picture, but I suppose I'll allow it, just this once.

Yamato Nikaido: Ichi's not the only one who's feeling embarrassed, but I think I've got a pretty good shot just for you guys.

Mitsuki Izumi: Thanks for having us!

Tamaki Yotsuba: Thanks!

Sogo Osaka: Congratulations on your 6th anniversary.

Nagi Rokuya: Only you will have the privilege of witnessing this special picture of me!

Riku Nanase: Please look forward to it!

Audience: Kyaaaaa..!

Mister Shimooka: ŹOOĻ!

Toma Inumaru: Let's make this the best anniversary ever!

Haruka Isumi: Hi.

Torao Mido: Thanks for having us.

Minami Natsume: Thank you.

Audience: Kyaaaaa..!

Tsumugi's Thoughts: Rabitty-kun's 6th anniversary special, Welcome to Kids' Room...

Tsumugi's Thoughts: For this show, our members had to find pictures from their childhood...

Tsumugi's Thoughts: And this is the story of how it all happened.

Tsumugi's Thoughts: Specifically...

Tsumugi's Thoughts: How it happened for MEZZO".

Tamaki Yotsuba: ........

Sogo Osaka: ........

- - - -

Tamaki Yotsuba: Welcome to Kids' Room...

Sogo Osaka: A show where we reminisce about our childhoods..?

Otoharu Takanashi: Exactly. You're both familiar with Rabitty-kun, the children's toy that took the world by storm some twelve years ago, yes?

Otoharu Takanashi: It was renewed and began its second run six years ago.

Riku Nanase: I remember Rabitty-kun! It was so popular when I was little! Ooh, ooh! I'm Rabitty!

Yamato Nikaido: The talking rabbit toys? We had at least three of those.

Mitsuki Izumi: Wow, gramps. You must've been a real Rabitty-kun superfan.

Yamato Nikaido: Superfan? Seriously..?

Mitsuki Izumi: Our parents only got us the one, so we had to take turns playing with it.

Iori Izumi: Right.

Riku Nanase: What's with the cool reaction, Iori? Didn't you like Rabitty-kun?

Iori Izumi: I have a cool reaction to all manner of cutesy stuffed animals, in case you haven't already noticed.

Iori Izumi: Besides, don't the rest of you find Rabitty-kun sort of... creepy? Because of the way he talks...

Yamato Nikaido: Creepy..? Nope, not really.

Mitsuki Izumi: Maybe he seemed scary to you because you were so little back then?

Riku Nanase: Do you know him, Nagi? It's possible that Rabitty-kun didn't ever land in Northmare.

Nagi Rokuya: OH, I do know him! I had a Rabitty Boy of my own once.

Nagi Rokuya: He could both sing and dance, and he enjoyed when I fed him carrots and pet his head.

Sogo Osaka: Wow...

Tamaki Yotsuba: Seriously?

Riku Nanase: What about you, Tamaki and Sogo-san? Do you know Rabitty-kun?

Mitsuki Izumi: Ah... Right, I guess you guys might've...

Sogo Osaka: I-I do know of him. Though I never owned one myself, I definitely remember hearing his name somewhere.

Tamaki Yotsuba: S-same here! We had a ton of old toys at the orphanage, so we totally had one of those somewhere!

Tamaki Ýotsuba: Y'know, the, uh... R-Rabitty Man?

Nagi Rokuya: Rabitty Boy.

Riku Nanase: No, it's Rabitty-kun!

Tamaki Yotsuba: Yeah, Rabitty-kun! What's he got to do with the show we're going on, anyway?

Otoharu Takanashi: Rabitty-kun's manufacturer, Toi Toi Toi Company, is the sponsor of this TV special.

Otoharu Takanashi: Tsumugi-kun, would you mind explaining the rest?

Tsumugi Takanashi: Not at all. It's for Rabitty-kun's 6th renewal anniversary...

Tsumugi Takanashi: ...For which they wanted to hold a big TV special where idol groups look back on their childhoods.

Tsumugi Takanashi: The chosen groups are IDOLiSH7, Re:vale, TRIGGER, and ŹOOĻ.

Tsumugi Takanashi: The show will feature not only Rabitty-kun, but many other children's toys and songs from the past.

Mitsuki Izumi: Wow! That sounds fun!

Yamato Nikaido: Are you sure our generational gaps won't get in the way? Take me and Tama, for example. We're a whole five years apart.

Tsumugi Takanashi: Speaking of which, you and Yuki-san are four years apart. That means he and Tamaki-san are nine years apart.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Whoa. He's basically old enough to be my dad.

Iori Izumi: Hush. Don't let him hear you say that.

Otoharu Takanashi: As part of the project, they've asked you to present your own childhood photos during the show.

Otoharu Takanashi: Do you all think  you could do that? If it's too difficult, we can ask them to pass on you during that particular segment.

Mitsuki Izumi: It's no problem for me and Iori. What about you, gramps?

Yamato Nikaido: I'm sure I'll have tons of pictures to choose from... Even ones that don't show where I lived back then. What about you, Nagi?

Nagi Rokuya: But of course. I was all over Northmare's newspapers for a few weeks after I was born.

Yamato Nikaido: Sure, but do you have pictures you could actually use for the show?

Mitsuki Izumi: They're not so overly fancy that they'll ruin it for the rest of us, are they?

Nagi Rokuya: Hm... Very well, I shall select the most wonderful shot  myself. And what of you, Riku? Will you have trouble preparing a photo?

Riku Nanase: I might have kind of a hard time. Especially if I accidentally pick a picture that's got both me and Tenn-nii in it.

Iori Izumi: Which you will not be doing, obviously.

Riku Nanase: Ugh, I can already tell that you're planning to pick a photo that matches Mitsuki's.

Iori Izumi: I'm not trying to be smug about it, you know.

Riku Nanase: I wonder which photo Tenn-nii will choose. We'll have to meet up and talk about this.

Banri Ogami: Are you sure you can all manage? Especially you, Tamaki-kun and Sogo-kun...

Tamaki Yotsuba: Ah, um... Yeah, probably!

Sogo Osaka: I think I'll be able to work something out, too.

Banri Ogami: Really? If it's too difficult, then you don't have to force it.

Banri Ogami: I know both your family situations are a bit complicated...

Tamaki Yotsuba: We'll be fine! I'll ask the director of the orphanage.

Sogo Osaka: I have the contact information of one of our housekeepers, so I can ask them.

Banri Ogami: Okay, then. Good luck.

Riku Nanase: I can't wait to see what we all looked like when we were little!

Mitsuki Izumi: Same. I'm curious to see how Yaotome might've looked.

Yamato Nikaido: I'm more interested in Inumaru. Do you think his eyes were always that stern?

Nagi Rokuya: Are you asking because your own eyes are the same way?

Yamato Nikaido: Shut it.  

Iori Izumi: I'll contact Kujo-san ahead of time, so we won't have any mishaps with Nanase-san.

Riku Nanase: I can do it myself!

Tamaki Yotsuba: .........

Sogo Osaka: .........

- - - - 

Sogo Osaka: Pictures from our childhood...

Tamaki Yotsuba: Pics from when we were little...

Sogo Osaka: Do you think you'll find one, Tamaki-kun?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Maybe, if they've got some at the orphanage... You?

Sogo Osaka: Maybe, if my father hasn't disposed of them... I wonder how many of them we even had...

Tamaki Yotsuba: You should've told Ban-chan that you're gonna have a hard time finding any.

Sogo Osaka: ...I could say the same to you.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Well yeah, but...

Tamaki Yotsuba: Everyone else was talking about that stuff so normally, and I wanted to seem normal too.

Sogo Osaka: Me too... Even after all this time, I'm still desperate to fit in.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Same. Even though we I know I can talk about this stuff with the guys.

Sogo Osaka: I wonder why that is.

Tamaki Yotsuba: I dunno.

Sogo Osaka: It's not a problem with any of them, or Banri-san. I guess I just don't want them to feel sorry for me...

Tamaki Yotsuba: Maybe that's it for me, too... I don't feel bad about it, but I also don't wanna get in the way of their happiness.

Sogo Osaka: Right. Maybe I'm just feeling awkward, because I didn't grow up like them. I didn't even have one of those Rabitty Dolls.

Tamaki Yotsuba: "Rabitty Dolls"?

Sogo Osaka: That's right. I was only allowed to have toys that would advance my intellectual development.

Tamaki Yotsuba: So-chan, that's not what they're called. Nobody had a "Rabitty Doll".

Sogo Osaka: Oh. What were they called, again?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Rabitty Man. No wait. I mean Rabitty-kun.

Sogo Osaka: Rabitty-kun.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Ooh, ooh!

Sogo Osaka: .....!? What's wrong? Did something get lodged in your throat?

Tamaki Yotsuba: ...No, no! Stop trying to pry my mouth open!!!

Sogo Osaka: It's because you made that groaning noise...

Tamaki Yotsuba: I was just pretending to be Rabitty-kun. Like: "Ooh, ooh! I'm Rabitty!"

Sogo Osaka: Ah, come to think of it, he did say something like that...

Tamaki Yotsuba: I wonder what the "ooh ooh" part's about.

Sogo Osaka: I don't know... Isn't Rabitty-san supposed to react to sounds, lights, and touch?

Sogo Osaka: Maybe he's being overstimulated to the point of excruciating pain, without even realizing it himself...

Tamaki Yotsuba: I don't think he says it 'cause he's in pain... Maybe he just can't get his mouth open?

Sogo Osaka: You think he's been gagged?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Why would anyone gag an innocent bunny toy?

Sogo Osaka: You're the one who said he couldn't open his mouth... In any case, I'll try and get a hold of someone  who might know about my pictures.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Like that housekeeper?

Sogo Osaka: Yes... They might help me, so long as they haven't resigned yet... What will you do?

Tamaki Yotsuba: I'm gonna ask the director. Pretty sure the orphanage's got at least some pics of me. Are you gonna call them right now?

Sogo Osaka: That was my plan.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Ok, I'll go call from my room then.

Sogo Osaka: Alright. Goodnight.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Mmh... But I might come back if my call doesn't work out.

Sogo Osaka: That's fine. We can figure this out together.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Okay. 

- - - -

[Door opens]

Tamaki Yotsuba: ........

Sogo Osaka: You're back. How did it go?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Ooh, ooh.

Sogo Osaka: Is that a groan of pain?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Yep.

Sogo Osaka: My attempt didn't go too well, either. Apparently only my father has access to any of our pictures. The housekeeper had no idea what has become of them.

Tamaki Yotsuba: They had pictures of me, but I'm too old in all of them. Like, thirteen and up.

Sogo Osaka: They had pictures of you when you were thirteen?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Yeah.

Sogo Osaka: Did they send you any?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Nope. The director doesn't know how smartphones work. Why, did you wanna see 'em?

Sogo Osaka: A little bit...

Tamaki Yotsuba: Heh. I think I looked pretty cool back then.  

Sogo Osaka: I think you were probably more cute than cool. You were only thirteen, after all. I just wanted to see a version of you that isn't taller than me.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Well I wanna see how you looked when you were little, too. Like, do you even look anything like that now?

Sogo Osaka: I should hope so, since they are pictures of me.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Heh.

Sogo Osaka: I know, it's pretty funny. In any case, I did find one good lead.

Tamaki Yotsuba: What kinda lead?

Sogo Osaka: One of my father's coworkers does photography for a hobby. He should have taken a picture of me with my uncle.

Sogo Osaka: He's someone very important, so his photos should have survived even after my father got rid of every photo of my uncle.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Your dad must really love throwing pictures away.

Sogo Osaka: I can almost sympathize with him... I wouldn't want to be reminded of such a completely and utterly ruined relationship.

Tamaki Yotsuba: So if MEZZO" disbands, you're gonna delete all your pictures with me in them?

Sogo Osaka: ........

Tamaki Yotsuba: You can't get rid of all of them, though. They're all over the world, in magazines and stuff.

Tamaki Yotsuba: So you're gonna be reminded of me no matter what. Tough luck.

Sogo Osaka: ........ ...That's true.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Ah, that reminds ME!!!

Sogo Osaka: W-what!?

Tamaki Yotsuba: I knew an uncle who took pictures of us, too!

Sogo Osaka: An uncle who took pictures...

Tamaki Yotsuba: Mom liked the family portrait that uncle took so much, she kept it near our TV.

Tamaki Yotsuba: We put that picture in her casket when she died, but if that uncle's got the original data, then he can make another one.

Sogo Osaka: True. Do you know where this uncle lives?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Nope... But Re:vale might.

Sogo Osaka: Re:vale?

Tamaki Yotsuba: Yep. What about you? Can you call that guy who works with your dad?

Sogo Osaka: I don't have the connections to just go talk to him. But I know someone who does.

Tamaki Yotsuba: Who? Ah... You mean that dude?

Sogo Osaka: Why do you look so upset? He's not that bad. Not anymore, at least.

Tamaki Yotsuba: I dunno. He still looks like an evil rich guy to me. 

To be continued...

#idolish7 #anniversary story 2021 #translation #i7 #trigger #re:vale #zool #other translations

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: July 10th

I really let asks get away from me lately. I was super focused on working on that Patreon Moment. With that done I can finally think about doing other things, so here’s a new collection of answers!

Thank you for sending in questions everyone ^^.

For the new Patreon moment, will you be able to reference it in step 4? Or just like a tiny nod to it if you pick certain choices?

There won’t be. I’m sorry if you were hoping for that! The Patreon moment is meant to be entirely optional, it’s not something that gets you extra content in the main game.

Is the new CG artist the main one now? :0 I’ve noticed theres been a difference in the art style recently. Is the old CG artist still going to make art for the game? :0

The original artist still makes CGs for the game sometimes, but he mainly focuses on character sprites.

Are you going to put the NSFW our life moment on a website other than patreon? I would love to get it but I can't use patreon atm.

I don’t know. I'm afraid we can't release the Patreon Moment on a normal game storefront because we can't mix 18+ content with our family friendly game. If there's some other place similar to Patreon where it's not the normal type of full-scale public content releases we'd consider using that, but I’m not sure if there is another site that’s better than Patreon in that regard. I'm sorry.

Out of curiosity, in all of your games so far, which characters in each were the most fun to write? They obviously don't have to be your favorite characters!

Buffalo Seer in AFA, really everyone in XOD/XOBD is pretty equally entertaining to write, The Guide in LoV, and Cove in OL!

idk if you accept "personal" questions, but is there anything you've been watching/ listening to lately

Mostly, I’ve been watching/listening to Authortube videos as of late! It’s people who talk generally about the process of how books become traditionally published and/or share their own experience as they attempt to be published. I don’t have an interest in writing normal text based books, but it’s really interesting to hear about that world. I’m listening to a video about royalties right now as I answer these asks.

Will one of the desserts we get to pick be fudge? That'd be such a cute reference! 

Haha, yeah, it should. Unless I completely blank on it and forget when trying to include the various referential food options.

I don't know if this has been asked previously but what would be the approximate heights for the presets MC can choose from Step 2 ~ 4? Are there any measurement you had in mind? Sorry if I didn't make myself clear kk I've been struggling with my English lately 💀 

I don’t know, ahah. I didn’t have any numbers in mind for that. So it’s whatever you imagine it is!

I noticed a bug with the Patreon moment when it comes to what your character wears. When Jamie and Cove are kissing while my character only had dresses selected, I had both the option to remove the dress or to remove the shirt... Picking one of the options to interact with Cove, after he removed his shirt, it had Jamie remove their shirt followed by ther pants despite only having dresses picked. 

Thank you for reporting ^^

I keep refreshing steam to see when the new doc for xobd will be released. I noticed you haven't posted anything about it in quite some time. Would it be possible to ask about a timeline/potential date? (If it's even this year—) I know you and your team are probably working super hard, I'm just super curious! ~Thank you!~ 

There are more stories done, I just haven’t gotten around to publicly releasing them. Hopefully I will have a chance to spend the time on that sooner rather than later!

hello!! i’m not sure if it’s an update but i’ve just replayed our life and at the end i can’t propose to cove anymore? :(( i’ve actually tried playing twice but the options are not there anymore, did you guys remove the options? i’m sorry if you’ve answered this before!! thank you and have a good one :) 

I’m afraid things haven’t been changed or removed, so I think you might’ve accidentally picked the wrong things somewhere along the way and locked yourself out of being able to propose by mistake. Sometimes you meant to say you want to get married but instead you mis-click and have it so the MC isn’t thinking about marriage or something. All I can suggest is starting from the beginning of Step 3 and making sure to follow the steps listed in the FAQ. I’m sorry for that.

Did yall remove some of the options for when youre making out with Cove in the charity moment? I could've sworn you could grab his bonkadonk and its not there anymore 

This is the same situation as the above. We didn’t remove things and you’re not wrong that there are sometimes those options. But there are various choices you have to make to get those options and it sounds like you accidentally missed something. If your relationship isn’t long-term, you can’t do it for example.

HI IM SO EXCITED I CAN FINALLY GET THE STEP 3 DLC 

Thank you for getting it!

Is Shiloh super totally straight bc I’m very gay and a huge Shiloh fan, would my man make an exception?😩

Sadly, he is one of our super straight characters. I’m sorry.

Hi, I have a very dumb question. In Step 2 does Cove not wanna share his drink with us at the mall (or rather why he stops drinking it) because it's an indirect kiss? Or is it like ...weird to him to share? Because if I remember right he eats off our spoon in the birthday scene right? 

Yeah, he’s awkward about it because he likes the MC and it feels very personal to share a straw with his crush.

Hi! If you don't mind me asking, who is the artist for OL2? Their style is so pretty! 

Thank you for saying so! This is her Twitter- https://twitter.com/redridingheart

Do Beginnings & Always and Now & Forever exist in the same universe? 

Yep! XOXO Droplets also exists in the same universe. It’s one big GB Patch world, haha.

Do Pran's parents regret the way they raised him? Do they feel ashamed of it?

No. They’re the type of people best cut out because they’re not gonna change. Which is why Pran does go very limited contact when he’s an adult.

Hi! I just wrapped up my second playthrough of Our Life, and I absolutely adore it, but I had a question. I went to the gallery and found I was missing 2 CGS (specifically Step 1-3 and 2-3) and I had no clue where they would've shown up. Which moments are those found in? 

You get it by telling Cove about his dad offering you money to be his friend in Step 1 and Step 2. You can’t get both in one playthrough, since you can only tell Cove the truth once. I’m really glad you liked it!

Hi hi! Please, how tall is Baxter and Derek? Love the game so much and I can't wait to see more! 

I don’t know, aha. I think Baxter was around 5′10 and Derek was like 5′8/5′9, maybe. I really am not one who has specific heights for things in mind.

is adult cove a bottom, top, or switch? 

A switch, though would choose the top if he had to pick.

I was wondering if there is a way to transfer save data? Even if through the game files. I wanted to be able to transfer my save data from my desktop over to my laptop so that I could continue playing right where I left off from but I'm not entirely sure how to go about that. 

If you save the save folder/persistent data of the game from your desktop and put it into the game folder on your other device, that could work.

Hi! Is it possible for us to know the date when our life: now and forever comes out on steam? Sorry if you've mentioned it before but I haven't seen it and I'm looking foward to that happening and just wanted to know :) 

It’s gonna be a long time, I’m afraid. There’s no estimate right now.

I started playing Our Life with my sister a while ago, and I think you guys should know that we discovered your secret. >:)

L from death note and Cove are clearly the same person, and this whole game is just an origin story!!

I’ve never seen that show so I’m sorry to say I don’t understand the connection/reference you’re trying to make. I’m pretty out of the loop when it comes to media. I don’t watch movies or TV.

Will OL2 have options for disabled MCs?

I understand if it's too complicated, just curious

Unfortunately, it’s not really something we have a plan for. We couldn’t finish the game if we tried to include every disability and have it be meaningful. It’d just be too much content to create. But if we decide to only include a few, how would we choose which disabilities get to be represented and which are left out? I don’t know. It’ll probably have to be something we don’t include as an option again, sadly. I’m sorry.

playing our life > anything else 

Haha, I’m glad you’re enjoying it.

Honestly, I would like to thank Our Life for helping me come to terms with my sexuality. Before, I never would've actually thought that it was possible to like boys romantically and still be asexual. Almost all of the BL visual novels I've read had unskippable sexual content in them and it honestly just didn't click with what I feel. I'm glad I found Our Life. I love the game, the developers, and this fandom so much. Now, I can safely come out as homoromantic AND asexual (at least anonymously here anyway; my parents are still huge homophobes 😂). 

Aw, it’s great to hear you felt comfortable being yourself in the game! That’s wonderful. I’m really sorry about your parents, though.

Will the demo for OL2 be on android? Really not sure if I could wait any longer than I have to aha 

Yeah, it’ll be available for Android once we eventually release a demo!

Do all these reveals perhaps mean development is progressing ahead of schedule? Please let that be the case I'm already obsessed with Qiu 

No, sorry, aha. Art comes along much faster than script/programming-work for us. It’s gonna be a long time before the game is a finished thing you can actually play. But at least we can look at the beautiful images.

Hey! First of all I wanna say I reallllllyyyyy loooovvveeee Our Life and XOXO Droplets! I have over 300 hours of playtime on Our Life… Anyways, I was just wondering, are the Derek and Baxter DLCs going to come out at the same time? If not, which one do you plan to release first? :3 

They will come out separately and Derek will be first! Glad you like the game.

I keep replaying Our Life to get every possible iteration and I am loving it <3 I was wondering if Cove gets locked out of his confession because MC was talking to Lee, would it be possible to confess to him in step 4? 

Yeah, you can avoid the confession in Step 3 and then get it in Step 4.

Hi, my Cove wears bracelets through step 2 and 3 but I still don't get an option to give him a bracelet? I didn't even know that was possible until I seen someone else ask about it lol 

Hm, did you use the Cove creator? Maybe there’s a bug where using the creator to add bracelets doesn’t fulfill the requirement to give Cove a bracelet in Step 3.

Wait, I'm dense, when does Baxter appear in step 2? Is it from big park firework? I feel so bad since i really love Baxter and waiting to buy his dlc. 

It’s in the Soiree Moment. You have to be just friends with Cove, indifferent, or crushing but not ask Cove to the dance at all. Then while there you can find someone new to dance with. But if you bring Cove to the dance while crushing, the MC won’t wanna dance with anyone else so you can’t get the scene.

In step 2 when we go to the soiree I made my mc go alone and baxter chooses the mc to dance, i'm curious, why did he pick the mc? sorry if this has been asked before! 

Because the MC looked to be around his age, seemed to also be searching for a partner, and had nice legs. A perfect option for him.

I read some of the FAQs, and I saw that we could tell Baxter about the condo that he rented there was previously the mean old grandparents. how do we get the mc to tell him that? 

It happens in the DLC Moment “Late Shift”. If you don’t have a job you instead get a longer scene with Baxter.

I don’t know if you’ve addressed this or not, but are you planning on paying voice actors for our life: now and forever? 

Yeah, we pay our VAs in all our projects.

hey can i ask how you did the moments thing in ol? im trying to get into making visual novels and while im VERY sure its out of my comfort zone and all that atm i kinda wanna know just for the future, bc im p sure it would work well for something i wanna do :O but its also fine if you cant say for other reasons :> 

I’m afraid I’m not sure what you mean. Are you asking how we programmed the screen or something script related? Adding Moments like that is pretty straightforward, though. You just have buttons that open to different labels and then the scripts are essentially individual short stories/vignettes. Good luck with your VN!

Since Autumn becomes gender fluid later in the game, will there be a character who remains as he/him to romance in game? 

OL1 has the he/him LIs, OL2 is all about other genders.

I don't want to impose on your creative plans, but a parrot could possibly make a good pet in an OL-type game? They're pretty long-lived and likely to still be thriving by the end even if the MC got them back in step 1. 

I do appreciate the suggestion, but I’m afraid it’s not likely going to happen. I understand there are technically some animals that could theoretically live long enough to last the whole game that or we could have the MC only get a pet after some years have already passed. But the many things that would have to be considered/accommodated for makes it just something we probably can’t manage adding. I’m sorry.

As time passes will we be able to see Qiu and Tamarack's other stage arts as well?

They are both so cute i can't wait to be friends with them!

Yeah, we’ll show content from other Steps in the future. It’ll be a little while from now, though.

Can you date Cove and still have your family comfort you in the car?

You can’t get Cove’s Step 3 confession scene if you have the family comfort you in the car. But that’s not the only way to date him. You can get together with him earlier in the game or later on in Step 4.

Is Mc always going to be the one walking down the aisle or could Cove do it? Also could you choose to have one of your moms walk you? 

No. Cove wouldn’t want to walk down the aisle like that and the MC automatically respects that. And the MC also gets to have their preferences respected, so it’s up to you whether they want to do an aisle walk or not. You also can pick who, if anyone, walks with you.

Once step 4 is out, will you be able to go the whole game on crush/love without either of you confessing? 

Yes, as long as you tell the game you don’t want to progress the relationship. Even in Step 4 it won’t force you to officially get together.

Howdy, so in Step 4, there will be any Romance with Derek that is not part of any dlc? 

He’s only a friend unless you get his romance story.

Will the step 4 in OL2 be one big step or are you considering moments? 

Step 4 is just an epilogue in both games.

hi kind of a weird question but!! we know tht cliff doesn't start dating again but. wht abt flings? like does he ever do 1 night stands or anything? thank u!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Nope. Cliff has a very small interest in sex. If he’s not in a real relationship with a partner he’s crazy about it simply isn’t something he feels a need for, so one night stands wouldn’t even cross his mind.

sorry if you've already answered this, but i was wondering if there were plans for there to be bonus love interests in OL2 like how we have derek and baxter in OL1.

Maybe! There are side characters who could be given romance stories, but whether or not it will happen depends on funding and how long everything else takes to finish.

I don't know if i'm allowed to ask about ol2 here yet, if not u can ignore this or answer it later. My question is can you date one of them and be good friends with the other? I don't want to be strangers with the other bcs i love them both a lot :<

Yes you can!

what patreon level do i have to be to unlock the nsfw moment? im on the $5 one right now, will that give me access to the moment, or just access to the moment progress? 

That’ll give you access! Tier 2 and anything higher allows the player to download it.

#our life #ask #gb patch #gb patch games #all projects #Our Life Beginnings & Always #Our Life: Now & Forever

[taexual]

i’d love you to stay but that’s simply insane // JJK (22)

  jungkook is an uncontrollable lead vocalist of the campus band, and you’re a goal-oriented top student that’s known his rich and complicated family since childhood. you don’t want anything to do with each other, until each other is exactly what you want to do.

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader

genre: college au

warnings: there is a timejump!!

words: 5.2k

  chapter twenty-two (final)

You had just left your house, already running late, when your phone lit up with an incoming call from Inna. Smiling with a good-natured roll of your eyes, you answered the phone. You already knew what she was going to say.

“Are you there yet?” you spoke into the phone, pressing it against your head with your shoulder while you put gloves on. It was chilly today.

“I’m by the entrance to the restaurant,” Inna replied, her voice manic. “I’m still in my car. I can’t leave. You might have to come and drag me in there by my hair.”

“Breathe,” you said, picking up your phone with a gloved hand before you looked around the empty street so you could safely cross it. “You can do this. It’s just dinner.”

“It’s dinner with his parents,” she shot back, still just as panicked. “I know you’ve known Jungkook’s parents as long as you’ve known your own, but it’s different for me. These people don’t know me. What if they hate me?”

You heard a beep on the line that indicated a new text message and pulled your phone back to check. It was Jungkook, sending you an exceeding amount of question marks and exclamation points; he had clearly noticed your absence.

“Well,” you started to say to Inna while you quickly typed back, OMW, and sent it to Jungkook, “they will definitely hate you if you ditch the dinner.”

Inna whined at this. “I called you for help.”

“How can I help you,” you couldn’t help teasing, “if your situation is different?”

Recognizing her own condescending tone in your words, she sighed heavily but made no attempt to correct herself as she pleaded, “please.”

“Alright, listen, it’ll be fine,” you said and almost stopped walking, too focused on the conversation. It was too cold to stand around on this late autumn evening, however, so you kept going as you spoke, “it’s the first time you’re meeting them, so you will most likely only talk about superficial things, like your education, your job, how you two met, how—”

“Most likely?” Inna repeated, distressed. “And what if they tell me, straight to my face, that they can’t stand the sight of me?

You couldn’t help but smile as Inna’s worries echoed your own when you and Jungkook were just starting to talk again. She’d found ways to convince you to be bold and give him a chance, so you owed it to her to be as encouraging as you could – even if it meant abandoning all plans and going over there to literally drag her into the restaurant by her hair as she’d said.

“They will not,” you told her firmly.

“But how do you know?” Inna demanded right back.

“Because you’re impossible to hate.”

“But what if they do?”

“Then, they won’t say anything,” you replied patiently, “because that’s a very rude thing to say to someone you’re meeting for the first time.”

Inna still found a loophole. “What if they’re extremely honest?”

“It doesn’t matter,” you said. “It’s still rude.”

“But what if—”

“Inna—just listen,” you cut her off as you stopped by another crosswalk, waiting for the light to change, “the only honest conversation I’ve had with Jungkook’s mother,” you spoke, “was two years ago, after she came to see me on campus. Remember that? Before then, we were on friendly terms but we never talked about our feelings, or anything deep at all. She could have despised me deep down in her heart, I wouldn’t have known.”

Inna considered this for a second – while you crossed the street – and then you heard her sigh in defeat.

“Right,” she said, hesitating. She must have been running out of excuses. “Well, that—I’m not sure if that makes it better, actually.”

“Just go in there. Okay?” you said, your voice soft. You had experienced the fright that comes with being in a relationship firsthand, so you tried to find a balance between tough love and caring support as you told her, “open the door of your car, step outside, lock the damn car – so we wouldn’t have history repeat itself – and then walk into the restaurant. You can do that, can’t you?”

You couldn’t see, her but you could feel her roll her eyes when you brought up the “Someone Broke Into My Car, Please Help, There’s No Way I Could Have Left It Unlocked” incident that she refused to talk about again after the police officers laughed her out of the station.

“Sure,” Inna said, “I can do that. If I walk in and then immediately turn back around.”

“No,” you said. “You walk in, you go meet your boyfriend and his parents, and then you send me an invitation to your wedding as soon as the dinner ends.”

She laughed at this in what was supposed to be a sarcastic way, but, instead, she just sounded hopeful.

“You’re very funny,” she said.

“And you’re very late,” you tossed back as you checked your own watch and then sped up. “Go.”

“Okay,” she said with a deep exhale. You heard the door of her car open. “I’m going. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” you replied, pleased to hear that she was really moving. “And if I find out you didn’t actually go in there, we will have a serious conversation the next time I see you. It might get physical.”

“I shall therefore avoid you,” she replied with grandiose dedication and then added playfully, “which shouldn’t be hard, considering that you’ve switched me for Jungkook.”

Gasping dramatically to emphasize your offense at this accusation, you defended, “hey, you were the one who moved out as soon as we graduated. I was going to suggest we continued to live together off-campus.”

“Your boyfriend would have hired a squad of assassins to kill me if I’d agreed,” Inna said, her voice light. Her car beeped twice in the background of the call, proving that she really locked it this time. “Moving in with you has been his dream come true.”

“Well, I’m running late to his show,” you said, already breathless as you were near-sprinting towards the venue that was still at least two minutes away, “so we’ll see if he still wants to live with me after tonight.”

“Oh! Sorry, you should have told me you were busy.”

“It’s fine,” you replied. “I’m never busy to scold you like you’ve scolded me every day for the four years that we lived together.”

Inna laughed. “It wasn’t every day.”

“It was,” you countered, feeling a smile spread on your face at the memory. “I sort of miss that sometimes.”

“Me too,” she admitted. “Lunch tomorrow?”

“Oh, you’re making an appointment to get your ass kicked?”

“There’ll be no need for that,” she promised. “I’ve already left my car.”

“Okay, that’s good,” you said. “I’ll see you tomorrow at one, then. Be brave, soldier.”

You chuckled at your own joke but Inna only hummed in appreciation.

“Thanks,” she said again. “Have fun tonight.”

“You, too,” you said, catching your breath as you slowed down after spotting the crowd of people, queuing by the entrance to the venue – the concert, clearly, hadn’t started yet. “Text me when you’re home.”

“I will if I’m not dead,” Inna replied.

Ignoring that, you reminded her one more time, “love you!”

“Love you, too,” she replied before hanging up just as she opened the door to the restaurant – and just as you reached the back entrance of the venue.

Namjoon was already waiting for you there. He greeted you with a quick hug and, even though he had a smile on his face, he still couldn’t help but chastise you.

“You’re late,” he said as the two of you entered the building, “he’s pretending to be fine with it but, really, he hasn’t let go of his phone for the past fifteen minutes.”

“It’s my bad,” you replied, “I should have left the house early but I had to make some last minute changes on my project. Are his parents here?”

“They’re here,” Namjoon replied and then back-tracked, “is everything okay with your project?”

“Yeah, it’s all done, I’ll present it tomorrow,” you replied. “Is the band ready?”

The two of you were on the move to see Parental Advisory, so you had no time to stop and properly discuss everything you wanted to ask each other, but that wasn’t new to either of you. Ever since Namjoon joined the team as Assistant Manager – per Jungkook’s request, much to everyone’s disbelief – you two had learned to talk about several different topics at the same time without getting confused.

“They’re ready,” Namjoon nodded, grabbing your arm when you took a turn towards the stairs leading up to the private viewing room upstairs, instead of walking down the hall towards the changing rooms, “they’re still backstage. He’s expecting you.”

“Oh, of course,” you nodded, allowing him to guide you down the hall; you could already hear the excited shrieks of the band members as they warmed up for the performance. “Are you sure I won’t interrupt—?”

“Namjoon!” a voice screeched, forcing you both to flinch in surprise. “Jesus, you’re still here?”

Both of you turned to see the frustrated publicist half-jogging to catch up with you. She gave you a nod of acknowledgement and turned back to Namjoon with a look that demanded an explanation.

“Yeah, Jungkook asked me to wait for—” he started to say but the publicist turned around, indicating for him to follow after.

“Don’t ever do anything Jungkook asks you to do, I thought you knew that,” she said, turning to look at him over her shoulder. “Come on, let’s move! The manager is not doing his job because one of the sound guys keeps flirting with him, and he’s distracted. I need you to be his right hand.”

Giving you an apologetic smile, Namjoon caught up with her and you could still hear him mumble, “that’s what I am anyway.”

“Alright, then I need you to be his right and left hand now,” she said curtly and then stopped, giving you one more look. “You’ll find the changing room okay, love? He’s been waiting for you.”

“Yeah, I’m going there now, thanks,” you replied, turning around towards the animalistic growls that would have sounded threatening if you hadn’t heard them so many times before.

You felt yourself smile as you knocked on the door gently and then turned the handle to enter. You’ve seen Parental Advisory in so many changing rooms over the past two years, there was virtually nothing they could do to surprise you, – which was why you merely sighed in content when you saw the boys jumping around the room and banging on their chests like gorillas infected with rabies.

Jungkook was the first one who turned around when he heard the door open and, not having expected you to finally be here – just like every previous time you were late to see him, he had assumed you were dead in a ditch – he did a double take before he finally leaped across the room towards you.

“Where were you?” he asked in a frenzy as he wrapped his arms around you as if the last time he’d seen you was months ago and not just this morning over breakfast, “I thought I asked Namjoon to walk you here.”

“Sorry, I’m here,” you replied, your chest cavity always turning into mush whenever he hugged you like that. “Namjoon did walk me, but your publicist—hey, you’re dressed already, aren’t you supposed to go up on stage?”

“We are. Soon,” he said and then, not intending to make you sound guilty, he added, “I was just waiting for you.”

Your eyes widening, you scolded, “Go! You’d perform just as well without me.”

Not letting you push him away from you, he kissed you instead – just quickly enough so the other members of the group wouldn’t notice, but long enough so you’d get to taste the familiar mint and strawberry on his lips.

“I know,” he said when he pulled away.

The confident grin on his lips surprised you even though it shouldn’t have.

“Oh, you do, then?” you asked.

“I do,” he replied, still smirking. “But I still need you with me all the time.”

“Hmm, right,” you spoke. “And having me around that often is not exhausting at all?”

“I wouldn’t know,” he said and, this time, he had every intention to make you feel guilty, “you keep leaving me by myself.”

Laughing because he was exaggerating and he knew it, you nodded your head in the direction of the other boys in the room – they were finished with their warm-up and were now busy making stupid expressions in the vanity mirror.

“You have your whole group with you,” you told Jungkook.

“They don’t count,” he replied dismissively.

Walking by at the right moment, Yoongi patted Jungkook’s shoulder, surprising him, “thanks a lot, friend. We’re going in five.”

He walked away before Jungkook could reply, throwing the younger boy a look over his shoulder to confirm that he’s not actually angry, but they really do need to head out now.

“Go,” you said, forcing Jungkook to return his attention to you. “Break a leg. Actually, break them both.”

He laughed, kissing you once more and not pulling away this time – not until he heard Taehyung groan dramatically as he walked past you two.

Awarding his bandmate with a roll of his eyes, Jungkook smiled at you. “I’ll see you after?”

“Of course,” you nodded.

“Promise?” he asked because this had become a ritual between you two.

“Promise,” you answered just like you’d done before every other Parental Advisory show for the past two years.

For the first time in their careers, Parental Advisory performed at one of the biggest venues in town – it took them years to get here but they always knew they would.

And yet, as they reached the middle of their set-list and paused for a ment, they still couldn’t take it all in – it felt surreal how the dozens of people who came to hear them perform had gradually turned into hundreds, making them legends on campus. And then hundreds turned into thousands, and made them into a viral sensation that virtually no one could resist singing along to.

You couldn’t help but give in to the intoxicating atmosphere as well.

The Parental Advisory performances – and the after-parties that followed; even if, nowadays, they were hosted at night clubs with the biggest capacity available in a particular town – were still an unforgettable experience, even more so when lighting and special effects were added into the mix.

Dancing along to the songs you’d heard a million times now, you cherished every second of this night as if you were never going to see it again.

But you knew you would.

The band had two more performances scheduled at this venue. And they had forty more left on the tour across the country.

Granted, they would have probably had far less if it weren’t for Namjoon.

Ever since you graduated and Jungkook managed to find a way to see eye-to-eye with Namjoon, he became one of the main reasons why Parental Advisory started to advance so quickly, releasing new songs that took the musical charts by storm and performing shows that prompted international magazines to question how it was possible for the band to fly under their radar for so long.

Namjoon never imagined himself working for a group he’d never particularly liked before, but this was precisely what he’d studied for: he knew the steps to success and he knew the people who’d help them climb those steps, too. And, as it turned out, he loved being a part of this ride as well.

The sudden mainstream popularity had come quickly but the members were ready for it.

Even Jungkook who found himself in a new sort of relationship with his father – one where they weren’t talking to each other unless it was absolutely necessary. This arrangement pleased them both but Jungkook knew it couldn’t be permanent. His father didn’t simply decide to quit talking to him; he just didn’t know how else to express his disappointment that his son had chosen his band instead of the family company.

Miraculously, Jungkook had found a way to make sure his father didn’t kick him out of the house he grew up in – the house he had just returned to – and that was when he announced that you and him were moving in together one Sunday night dinner.

His mother was overjoyed. His father – startled by the way she leaped from her seat in uncontrollable excitement – was forced to quit simmering in silent disappointment, and express his support as well. Even though it wasn’t what he was hoping for, Jungkook’s father got exactly what he wanted – his son had grown up.

As it turned out, when you agreed to help Jungkook get himself together, you weren’t doing it so he could take over the family company, but rather, so he would be able to show his father what he really wanted to achieve in life.

And he’d done that.

He’d done that so well, in fact, that both of his parents were now clapping along to the rhythm as they sat behind you, by the bar of the VIP booth. They both waved at you when you turned to look.

When you looked back at the stalls, you saw what you’d seen many times before – the people sang and danced along, their eyes burning with fires so big, it was like they were asleep before they came here, and this music was what made them finally wake up and realize that they were alive.

You would never grow tired of watching the venue come to life as soon as the band played the first few notes.

You would never grow tired of the way the members of Parental Advisory lost themselves in their audience, and the audience lost themselves in them.

And you would certainly never grow tired of that fact that every time, right before they started the encore, Jungkook would find you, wherever you were in the audience.

“I love you,” he would mouth soundlessly, and you’d hear him loud and clear, past the noisy ambiance of the venue, no matter how far away from him you were.

While the rest of the Parental Advisory members left to prepare for a long night of partying ahead, you and Jungkook left the venue on foot, purposefully choosing to take the long way home.

“Are you sure you didn’t want to go to the club?” you asked again as you walked through an empty park, holding hands and enjoying each other’s warmth on an otherwise cold night. “It’s the first performance out of three, the members will miss you.”

“They’ll be too drunk to notice I’m gone,” he replied, smirking as he added, “besides, tonight gives them an occasion to break out another bottle of absinthe and we both know how much you love that.”

Scrunching your nose, you reminded him, “I could have waited for you at home. Just because I can’t go to the party doesn’t mean you shouldn’t—”

“I need you with me at all times,” he replied, “remember?”

“I am with you at all times,” you said.

“Except when you’re off breaking records at work,” Jungkook teased.

You lowered your eyes and did not get to see the way his face beamed with pride. You’d become the youngest Team Manager the company’s ever had, and you’d done that on your own, choosing to find a workplace where you could try to build your career from the ground up, instead of getting an—unfair—advantage of working for Jungkook’s father.

Your promotion came several months ago now, but Jungkook was still proud.

“I’ve only broken one,” you replied humbly, “and it hardly counts. Soon enough, there will come someone who’ll become Team Manager at an even younger age than me.”

“Still,” Jungkook shrugged, gently rocking your intertwined hands back and forth as you walked down the deserted park. “I don’t get to see you as often as I’d like because you’re working all of the time. I’m not even sure if you eat at all when you’re away from home.”

“We always have dinner together,” you reminded him with a smile – because coming home to him has been the favorite part of your day – and then added as an afterthought, “hasn’t it been two years that we’ve been together?”

“You counted?” he asked, a teasing grin on his lips. “How sick of me are you?”

“A little,” you joked, and then had to run after him as Jungkook dramatically dropped your hand and broke into a run, putting more distance between you. 

Catching up with him, you grabbed his arm with both of yours and forced him to slow down. “Hey, come on! You know I’m joking!”

Your voice was full of humor and so was his when he replied, “your jokes were always terrible.”

It was your turn to let go of him as you took a step back and demanded, “you take that back!”

Laughing, Jungkook walked towards you so he could envelope you in a hug, all while you watched him with mock-offence. He pulled away from the hug a second later to wipe the expression off your face by pressing his lips to yours.

“It has been two years,” he said then, keeping his arms comfortably wrapped around your waist, “and somehow I’m still not used to the fact that we can just… do whatever we want together. Stand here like this. Jump into that pile of old leaves if we feel like it.”

Laughing, you shook your head.

“Maybe let’s do the leaves some other time,” you said, leaning into him by resting your head against his shoulder. “Unless we’re much more used to each other in a few years and we don’t want to roll around in leaves anymore.”

“Hmm, I don’t think so,” he replied, closing his eyes for a moment when the smell of your hair reached his senses. He hadn’t gotten used to that, either. “I think this is something that I’ll always have a hard time believing to be real.”

You could feel the way your heart rate slowed down when you leaned against him. It suddenly seemed impossible that, just a few years ago, enjoying each other’s company in an empty park in the middle of the night, would have been merely a dream – something you woke up from when morning came.

“Maybe it’s because there are no people around,” you suggested, “and that’s why this feels surreal.”

“No, it’s like this all the time,” Jungkook disagreed, exhaling as he put one of his hands on the back of your head, holding you against him. “It makes sense, though, doesn’t it?”

Distracted by the feeling of him so close, you mumbled, “what does?”

“The disbelief,” he said. “I mean, two years ago, would you have thought we’d be here? Standing like this, under this leafless willow tree, probably looking sort of creepy to anyone who might walk by?”

Chuckling when he turned something that could have been romantic into a potential to get arrested, you shook your head against his shoulder. “No. I definitely didn’t. But I’m glad we are. Even if we look creepy.”

“Hmm,” caressing your hair, he hummed with a satisfied smile, “I’m glad, too.”

“Do you think we’ll still be here another two years later?” you asked. “Looking creepy to anyone who might walk by?”

It was Jungkook who couldn’t resist laughing this time as he replied, “I hope so.”

He wasn’t certain – he didn’t promise you that you would definitely still be here – and perhaps that made sense, too. He said he’d never lie to you and you couldn’t expect him to start now, not even if a promise of forever would have been the appropriate thing to give in a situation like this.

“I’d like that, though,” he added after a moment. “I’d like to think you’d have enough patience to deal with me for another two years.”

You were about to smile at the on-going joke about how you were “putting up” with him, but then stopped yourself because, truth be told, it wasn’t funny. Not in this context and, actually, not in any context at all.

“You’re not a nuisance to me,” you told him--as you have a dozen times before--but your voice was too quiet to make it sound as impactful as you’d hoped, so you added, louder, “I love you.”

“I know,” he replied and continued, in an almost defensive manner, “but, because we’d already been apart from each other before, it’s hard to just start believing that we have a happily ever after ahead of us. You know what I mean?”

You pulled your head away from his shoulder and looked at him. “That’s—”

“But,” he cut you off after catching the terror in your eyes, “at the same time, if we’d never separated before, it’s possible that we wouldn’t be here at all right now. So, maybe it was all meant to be.”

“Do you really believe that?” you asked, not concealing your skepticism and the fear that was still present in your chest after he’d revealed that he didn’t believe in your happy ending. “Do you think it was necessary for us to spend some time apart so we could find ourselves here?”

Jungkook shrugged. “I’d like to think that everything happens for a reason and that every action leads to something else. Sort of like a Butterfly Effect. So, maybe suffering for seven years was worth it because it prepared us for a lifetime of happiness ahead.”

He could see the way your face contorted painfully for just a second – you were always sensitive when it came to cliché lines – and it brought a smile to his face. He was happy, and even more so when he realized that, two years later, you had learned how to talk about your seven-year break without suffocating.

Two years later, it became one of the obstacles you had overcome. One of many, maybe, but if you’d survived that, there was little you couldn’t survive.

“I don’t think suffering of any kind should be worth it in the end. I think it’d be better if we didn’t suffer at all,” you argued but then settled, a moment later, “I do agree that unhappiness makes you appreciate happiness more, though.”

“See?” he grinned, choosing to consider this as a compromise. “Meant to be.”

“Well, since it sounds like the universe loves kicking us where it hurts the most,” you spoke, the smile on his face easing the anxiety that his previous uncertainty about your future had brought, “why don’t we go for those additional two years, too? Or more if we’re lucky. Even if we aren’t really meant to be. Especially if we aren’t. Just to spit the universe in the face.”

Laughing, Jungkook hugged you tighter until you were pressed against him and could no longer see his face.

“We are lucky,” he said, cherishing every moment with you because he never knew how many more of them he’d get, and that was okay, because he stood here, holding you tightly in his arms, and nothing else existed to him but this moment. He finished, “but only because we decide to be.”

“Yeah?” you played along, hugging him back with an equal amount of love and force. You’d unintentionally started a war of Who Could Squeeze The Other One Tighter. He was winning as you asked breathlessly, “so, there’s no such thing as destiny, then?”

“No, there is,” he replied, letting go of you when he realized that his grip on you might have really done some serious damage to your lungs. You were smiling when you pulled away from the hug, however. He added, “I’m the one who gets to decide what my destiny is, though.”

“And what’s that?” you asked.

“Yo—”

“If you say ‘you’,” you gave him a warning look, “I will smack you.”

He laughed, puffing his chest in preparation for a punch that he knew might come; you weren’t really kidding about these things.

“That’s mean,” he said then, and, as a ploy to extract pity – but also because it was the truth – he added, “I love you.”

Naturally, you replied, “I love you more.”

Naturally, he protested, “no, you don’t.”

It annoyed you that he always did this but, at the same time, it was such a familiar trait of this, that right here, right now, you couldn’t help but feel the warmth in your chest spread to your face as you smiled, despite yourself.

“I do,” you argued, still grinning.

“You don’t,” Jungkook insisted.

“I do.”

“You d—”

Knowing what was coming – and how long it’d be before you’d reach the end of this argument – you leaned in and pressed your lips to his, promptly shutting him up.

When you heard him inhale in surprise, his lips moving against yours to respond to the kiss, you pulled away.

Breathless, even though his lungs were full of oxygen, Jungkook nodded, impressed.

“Nice,” he commented.

“Yeah?” you snickered. “Maybe I’ll use that to win all arguments against you.”

“Cool,” he agreed. “Maybe I’ll use that to start more arguments with you.”

Thrilled to feel that excited jump of your heart each time you naturally slipped back into flirting – even two years after you started to date – you bit back, “more than you do now? Impossible.”

Raising his eyebrows, he returned to his College Frat Boy roots as he inquired, “is that a challenge?”

Laughing, you pulled away from him far enough so he couldn’t reach you, only to end up right by his side again when he took both of your hands into his, not letting you stray too far from him.

“Is everything a challenge with you?” you countered, the feeling of his warm hands against your cold ones comforting.

“It is,” he said, serious. “And I’m winning.”

“How so?” you asked.

“I have you.”

You looked ready to punch him again so Jungkook took both of your wrists into one of his hands and covered his face with his free hand, blocking his view of your defeated expression as you groaned and rolled your eyes.

“I wasn’t a challenge,” you replied, choosing to avoid violence when you knew he was strong – and dedicated – enough to lift you up and throw you over his shoulder if he felt like it.

“You were,” he disagreed, dropping his hand to his side. “Admit it, you thought you’d be insane to let me back into your life.”

“I still think so sometimes.”

You were joking and he couldn’t lose the cheerful tone of his voice, either, as he asked, “do you regret it?”

“Abandoning my sanity to be with you?” you clarified.

Snorting, Jungkook nodded.

“No,” you answered without a second thought. “Even though I probably should.”

Laughing – because he didn’t think he was ever happier than he was in that moment; although, to be fair, he felt so about every moment with you – Jungkook hugged you tighter, spinning you around in a half-circle so unexpectedly, you squealed at the feeling of your feet leaving the ground for a full second.

“I love you,” he said once he put you down and pressed his forehead against yours. “My destiny isn’t just a few more years with you. It’s a few more decades. And now that I’ve said it out loud, it has to come true.”

Closing your eyes, you tried to catch your breath and felt yourself smile even though your stomach contracted unpleasantly when Jungkook purposefully chose to voice his thoughts in the cheesiest way he could manage.

“I love you more,” you told him and then, realizing your recklessness, rushed to add, “and don’t you dare—”

“No, you don’t.”

He was provoking you and you knew it but, honest to all that was holy, you didn’t mind it one bit. 

Pressing a kiss to his lips to distract him and change the topic, you felt Jungkook hold onto you tighter as he smiled into the kiss, thus confirming that this was precisely what he was hoping would happen.

“I’ll take it I win, then,” he said after you pulled away to take a breath and felt the cold breeze on your face.

“Let’s talk about that home,” you replied. “I’m cold.”

“Yeah?” he let go of you so he could zip your jacket up to the very top and then unfold your collar so it would cover up more of your neck. Then, once he was content with the amount of warmth your jacket could provide, he took your hand again. “Let’s go home.”

fin.

masterlist

#bts reactions #jeon jungkook #jungkook #bts college au #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #fanfiction #jungkook fanfiction #jungkook fanfic #college au #jungkook college au #jeon jungkook fanfiction #jeon jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #bts x reader #fluff #bts fluff

[boltwrites]

Misfits - Chapter 2

Fandom: Star Wars - Clone Wars / The Bad Batch Pairing: The Bad Batch / Reader (Polyamorous) Rating: M (Rating May Change) Tags: Polyamorous Relationship, Force-Sensitive Reader, Slow Burn

Work Summary: After a year working with the 501st, you've been assigned a new post - Clone Force 99, aka the Bad Batch. You're concerned about the transition - you found it hard enough to fit in with the 501st, and now you had to acclimate to an entirely new squad. As it turns out, the Bad Batch is very accommodating.

Chapter Summary:  You're started to settle in with the Bad Batch. Introductions are in order, but one in particular leads down a path you never expected.

read it on ao3 | or read more below

You had said goodbye to Rex only a few minutes prior. He had wrapped you in a tight hug and told you not to get into too much trouble, and you had to try really, really hard not to start crying in front of your new squad. He’d waved as you entered their transport, and instead of dwelling on those emotions – loss, sadness, anxiety – you’d pushed them to the back of your mind. You learned long ago that acting as if they didn’t exist wouldn’t help anything, but right now, you needed to compartmentalize. You hardly knew these men, and you didn’t want to freak them out by sobbing about leaving your best friend behind.

The men in question had since been introduced to you by Hunter. The tall, slender clone who liked to lean against the side of the ship like some half-baked deathstick dealer was Crosshair, a sharpshooter and sniper. You probably should have figured that, judging by the tattoo that encircled his eye. When Hunter introduced you, he had made a noncommittal noise, looked you up and down, and then decided you weren’t very interesting, instead walking his way back to the cockpit. You hoped he was just antisocial, and didn’t hate nat borns, or women, or something.

The big burly one was Wrecker, who had wasted no time in offering you a big smile and a firm clap on the back. Honestly, you thought he was going to hug you – and maybe he was, and then he thought better of it.

“You’re our new Jedi, huh?” he had asked with a broad smile? You offered him a somewhat hesitant one back – he was intimidating, after all. He was broad and muscular like you had never seen on a clone before, and the large scar that encompassed half of his forehead and a good portion of his scalp was distracting. It made him look hardened and dangerous, but with his jovial tone, you soon found out he was anything but menacing.

“Yeah, guess I am?” you answered with a nervous laugh.

“She’s a force-sensitive, Wreck, not a Jedi. She doesn’t answer to the Council.” Hunter had clarified. You were somewhat shocked that he cared about the difference – but, then again, he had seemed pleased that you weren’t a part of the Order, likely because it meant you had less rules to follow.

“Oh, yeah!” Wrecker had grinned, clapping you on both shoulders now, as he leaned down to grin at you. You had laughed a little harder, because you were starting to see now, by both his force signature and in his voice, that he was really just a big goofball. “I never liked the Jedi anyway!”

“Weren’t you just expressing how excited you were for ‘our new Jedi?’”

That had come from the one with the glasses – er, goggles? You weren’t exactly sure what they were, or if he needed them for his bad eyesight or just tactical reasons. Either way, he adjusted him on his face as Hunter introduced him as Tech. It wasn’t difficult to figure out what his specialty was – much like it was easy to deduce that Wrecker liked to punch things in addition to blowing things up. Tech, of course, handled a lot of technical issues and data – but you were actually shocked at the fact that he wasn’t, well… tiny.

Tech was taller than Hunter, and even Rex, as he peered down at you through his glasses. He took your hand and shook it – you could tell just by his grip that he was used to intricate work – robotics, droid work, rewiring datapads – fiddly things that required a steady hand. You had nodded politely to him as he greeted you.

The last member of the team, and perhaps the most elusive, was Echo. He was paler than the others, and studded with prosthetics – most prominently, the jack that his hand had been substituted with. He had an aura about him in the force that spoke of pain – not the pain of war that the rest of the squad exuded, no. This was a deeper pain, something profound and lasting, and you had a feeling it had to do with that arm, and the bolts in his skull, and the way his cheekbones still looked sharper than that of even Crosshair.

“You’re from the 501st?” he had asked, after Hunter had led you to the cockpit and left to look at something in Tech’s travel plans for the route to their next mission. You were alone, but Echo still gazed out the front of the transport into hyperspace, his flesh hand fiddling with the textured armrest of the captain’s chair.

“Yeah – I’ve worked with them for the past year, most of the time. I get contracted out from the unit to do a lot of stealth work that the Jedi obviously can’t be pulled for. Stuff like this, I guess,” you shrugged. Echo had hummed in acknowledgement, glancing at you, almost curious.

“Were you with the 501st when Captain Rex last worked with… Clone Force 99?”

The wording was strange. Rex had mentioned to your that this squad usually referred to themselves as “the Bad Batch” due to their mutations. But Echo was more cautious – he almost hesitated on the name. His force signature didn’t give away much more – it only told you that he was being careful with his words, that he didn’t trust you quite yet. Which, honestly, was to be expected.

“No. Anaxes, right?” Echo nodded, and you shook your head. “No – I was on a stealth mission. Well, I guess it couldn’t really be called a stealth mission… I was working with a pirate named Hondo Onaka. Think I might have rather been on Anaxes.”

You chuckled, trying to make light of it. You knew Anaxes has been a mess, and honestly you had felt horrible leaving behind the 501st in order to take on what you considered a useless political mission. You knew the campaign had been long, grueling, and complicated, and you always felt guilty when you weren’t by Rex and Anakin’s side to help with something so important.

“Ah,” Echo made a soft noise, picking at some scoring marks on his socket arm. You bit your lip at the awkwardness that permeated the room, the conversation stagnating at Echo dwelled on… something.

“I used to be a part of the 501st,” he finally admitted, glancing up at you. His eyes said more than his lips – there was sadness, there. It was hidden behind his soldier’s veneer of indifference, but you could tell by the way he looked at you that his transfer to Bad Batch hadn’t been as straightforward as your own.

“Yeah?” you asked, sitting down in the co-pilot’s chair next to him. He nodded, sighing, relaxing into the chair before shooting you a glance.

“Yeah. Made ARC trooper at one point. Me and Fives – me and Fives.”

His eyes had gleamed the first time he said it – but as he repeated Fives, his face fell, and your own did as well, your first clenching.

“Oh,” you breathed, and he glanced at you, ducking down to try to make out your expression.

“You knew him?”

“He talked about you – I had – I’m stupid,” you laughed, trying not to think about Fives. You hadn’t known him or Tup long before the incident, but Fives had showed you the ropes, along with Rex. You got along with him easily – he had been funny, and kind, and if he tried to flirt with you a few times you just put it up to you being the only woman available.

You remembered him talking briefly about Echo – he had only mentioned Echo once, with gritted teeth and a set jaw, mumbling something about a previous mission, and how he and a fellow ARC trooper had handled the situation. You could tell that it pained him to mention his comrade – that this Echo had likely died – and you didn’t press the subject. You knew, even then, that Fives didn’t deal well with loss. Ironic, then, how he was the one to cause so die, to cause the grief himself.

“I worked with him, before…” you gestured vaguely, and Echo nodded, not wanting you to mention Fives’s death himself.

“He thought I died at the Citadel. Everyone did,” Echo sighed, staring out at the hyperspace lane. “Maybe I did.”

You stared at him. In the force, his emotions were a tangled mess – grief, both for Fives and himself. Pain – not only physical, but emotional, spiritual. You couldn’t fathom what happened to him – you could look at this physical evidence of his cybernetic appendages, more similar to those of a droid than any prosthetics you had seen before. You could see the pallor in his face, the way his cheekbones jut from his face, how he had squinted far too severely in the light of the Coruscanti sun. He had been through something that you couldn’t fathom, something you would never truly understand, even if he did wish to explain it to you.

But despite that, you could still feel him in the force. When he spoke of Fives – the way his signature sparked let you know that he didn’t just know Fives. You could tell they had worked together for years, that they had likely grown up together. The rest of the Batch – their signatures sang in harmony because they had grown up together, because they had known each other for many years. And you initially hadn’t caught onto Echo’s dissonance – the way that he was trying to fit in with them, but how he didn’t fit in quite as easily as the other men. And now you knew why. It was because, while he had changed, he still held onto those bonds. Rex, Fives, the rest of the 501st – even though whatever Echo had endured, those were still his brothers.

“Not completely,” you mumbled, looking down. You could feel Echo’s eyes on you, so you sighed and continued. “You – you still care about them. Those men. They may not be your men anymore – and I guess they aren’t mine, either – but you care for them. That has to count for something.”

When you looked up, Echo caught your eye. His expression was unreadable, and his signature betrayed nothing. He was hard to read already – the cybernetics clouded your judgement – but you could tell that he didn’t exactly know what he thought of your statement.

“Yeah. Maybe it does,” Echo mumbled to himself, staring out across hyperspace, as stars flew by, exploding behind his eyes as he contemplated his place among them.

After that, the silence wasn’t quite so awkward. It was comforting, almost. You knew that it wasn’t the same – that although you and Echo were both former members of the 501st, that the circumstances were wildly different. But you still felt a kinship with him. Because he still knew Anakin, and Rex, and Fives, and Jesse, and Kix, and all the others. Because he probably played the same drinking games you had with the men, he had fought beside them as you did, and he had watched them die, as you had. You knew he wasn’t ready to talk, and perhaps he never would be. But if he ever was, you would be ready to listen.

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taglist (get added!)

@killtherandomness @pastelpanda19

#the bad batch x reader #the bad batch x you #echo x reader #hunter x reader #tech x reader #crosshair x reader #wrecker x reader #misfits #mine

[ugh-againwiththenames]

So Many Fanfics So Little Time

This is just my list, I have seen so many (but if you want to use it it’s all yours too!).  I’m not a writer.  But I am a hell of a reader. Voracious one might argue. I just wanted to track my progress through the weeds of the absolutely never ending supply of Destiel and Cockles fanfic. 

Read on if you want to see what I’ve read, and what I’ve thought. I am but one person with opinions - some of them may be unpopular - some of them you might agree with, but if you find something you haven’t read here, I encourage you to do so. 

Honestly, this is just so I can track what I have read already, and when my friends ask, I can reference something easily. I have found some different fics on all kinds of ‘best of’ lists all over the interwebs. And I love recs - so rec away friends. 

As someone who reads a solid 40 novels a year typically, I don’t come by the “I read a lot” innocently. I do actually read a LOT.  When not reading fanfic (a new obsession, all things being fair), I usually read a lot of Fantasy/high fantasy, romance/erotica, and or YA (yeah, that was a bit of a ride no?).  So from this one might digress that I like fluffy, cute stories, complicated and supernatural/paranormal type stories, and I sure do not shy away from violence or smut (or maybe violence with smut? *smirk*). 

I have read all of these in the last 2-3 months (I will continue to add as I go). I had never read a fanfic until 2-3 months ago.  A lot of these wonderful people are on here, and I mean you no offence by not directly tagging you - I’m still learning how to actually properly use this site. Links to AO3 are included (and I love you all). 

These aren’t necessarily in any real order - I did read T&S first, followed by 91W, and 4LW...after that it’s just a shit show of Long or Short, Destiel or Cockles - smorgasbord. Some of these are the most popular Fics out there, and others I’ve never seen recc’d anywhere (just sort of accidentally happened upon them).  So let’s get to it, shall we? 

Twist and Shout - ok look. I understand the stigma associated with this one, but it was the FIRST one I read. It was the ball that shot me down the hill, and I haven’t stopped since. So. I loved it. I CRIED like a baby. SOBBED. It was not the quality of the writing but the way the story was developed and delivered. I have Never Cried Like This Reading a Story IN MY LIFE. It’s a rite of passage. Read It and have an opinion - it doesn’t need to be mine.  

Author(s): gabriel, standbyme   https://archiveofourown.org/works/537876/chapters/955188

Ninety-One Whiskey - aka 91W, it is mentioned so much, and is SO worth the read.  I continued my dive into the war fics (not typically my bag really and here I was reading 2 in a row).  There are a couple of followup stories as well to this series (and yes, I’ve read them all).  Although I’ll say that the original is my favourite. I often got lost in a bit of the War/Tactical descriptions, but would recommend it to anyone anyway. Ugh...the “stolen moments”...they were at the same time tragic and the most amazing things ever.  You feel me? no? go read it. 

Author:  komodobits   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2362190/chapters/5214500

Four Letter Word for Intercourse - aka 4LW.  OMG just, OMG. I loved this story. I loved it so much. I think I read it in a day.  Devoured it. It’s so HOT. Just read it. If you haven’t you’re missing out.  LEMME AT IT. I loved “knowing the secret”, and had some major anxiety about that realization dawning (I had to take a breath, and be like, no, no, this is gonna be a mess, but it’s gonna be SO GOOD - I was not disappointed).  There’s more than one work here too - read them all. PLEASE. 

Author: bendingsignpost  https://archiveofourown.org/works/16086839/chapters/37568591

Memories Bring Back Memories (Bring Back You) - This was the first Sobs one I read, but it sent me on a spree.  this is the Memory Loss one.  I have one piece of advice here - read everything by Sobsicles. You can thank me later...just go to her page, and fucking sort to supernatural (or not, read it all!) I’d list them but I’d fucking seriously be here all day.  Also, her tags make me laugh so hard.

Author:  sobsicles https://archiveofourown.org/works/24022945/chapters/57796885

Orpheus - I love this one too, Tattooed!Cas, my LOVE. paired with Mechanic!Dean, my HEART, #help.  Read this one in one evening as well. (I was on a roll).  It’s a one night stand that turns into more (much like my last relationship)....hmm...maybe this is why I was pulled in - although to be fair that is the last similarity to my shitty love life! I do not remember how I stumbled onto this one (tattooed Cas may have been the draw...tbh). Read the warnings though, there is some triggering stuff in this one - but if you can handle it, it’s definitely worth the read. 

Author: sysrae       https://archiveofourown.org/works/2364347/chapters/5220227

Have Love, Will Travel - Can you say no to Stripper!Dean? Cause I sure as hell cannot. Typical sort of character development here with Dean having trust issues, and Cas being painfully awkward...(but in like a super cute way?).  Would Recommend. 

Author: squeemonster   https://archiveofourown.org/works/565455/chapters/1011747

The Inexhaustible Silence of Houses - Change of pace here...It’s got a nice twist.  I didn’t actually clue into how it was going to end until very near the end (maybe I was being oblivious), when the realization came over me and I was...man. I was DONE IN.  I hope that doesn’t spoil (I need some kind of way of remembering them). Voiceless!Cas Hunter!Dean

Author: Askance (doomcountry)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/560268/chapters/1000755

Adagio - This is super short, and super cute. Honestly, I would read the whole thing just for the last line. It’ll take you less than an hour if I remember correctly. Go, I’ll wait. I squeeed. did you? 

Author: noangelsinthegarrison   https://archiveofourown.org/works/1397248/chapters/2928145

Any Little Heartache - super easy read (not in a bad way, but in a ‘you’ll fly through it’ way).  It’s mid-length, not graphic, but really fun hospital AU. HeartSurgeon!Dean / Nurse!Cas - enemies to lovers anyone? Fuck you to Fuck me? yeah. YUM. 

Author: followthattardis https://archiveofourown.org/works/5143376/chapters/11838311

Ad Astra - This is another short(ish) one, just one chapter.  And by that I mean that this is written like a very long poem. Cas as a star who has visited Dean many times over the years of his life, that culminates in 4x01 barn scene. It’s ‘awe’ sad. ‘puppy dog eyes’ sad. The writing format took me a bit to understand what was happening - it’s my lack of poetry knowledge, not the writing.  

Author: nhixxie https://archiveofourown.org/works/1013491

Ad Astra Per Aspera - This is a cute story.  ESL writer, no judgement.  I found this while looking for the one above, and thought the premise looked cute - and it was. Misunderstanding leading to Dean realizing he’s actually Bi.  Miscommunication leading to realization.  

Author: Riverchester https://archiveofourown.org/works/12354336/chapters/28101816

Psalm 40:2 - Time travel post-canon Cas and Pre-series Dean.  If you’re wondering how that works, strap in for this ride, it’s well worth it. 

Author: unicornpoe https://archiveofourown.org/works/30786425/chapters/75992444

Addicted to You - Warlock!Dean/Incubus!Cas - accidental ‘mating’ (I actually really don’t like that word, but there’s sort of no avoiding it in this situation). Cute story.  When you drunk dial a succubus and get an incubus instead...Whatever will we do? 

Author: Ltleflrt https://archiveofourown.org/works/4387346/chapters/9959288 

A Glimpse Beyond - End Fix-it. Not yet complete, 10 chapters so far...I want MORE! Reliving memories Dean/Cas & Sam/Eileen.   

Author: NorthernSparrow https://archiveofourown.org/works/27731689/chapters/67875925

Cas-ti-el - Please I want more...It’s like the story just started. Please write more of this story!! 1 chapter, it’s a trope prompt challenge, but I want it to be a full on story of its own. Imprinted names of their soul mates, Dean doesn’t understand his (because it’s in a different language)...I’m frustrated by wanting this story to keep going. 

Author:  Valinde (Valyria)  https://archiveofourown.org/works/1941591

Our Bodies, Posessed by Light - another short one. Not going to lie, this one took a little getting used to, and I can’t say that I enjoyed it too much for the sole purpose that the premise gave me the willies.  Cas has to vessel jump - ends up in Sam...I got through it, it had a good ending, but yeah, sorry. This just wasn’t for me. 

Author:  obstinatrix  https://archiveofourown.org/works/260289

Peanut Butter Pumpkin Wedding Cake - Waiter!Dean / Writer!Cas - This is so effing cute, just misunderstanding after misunderstanding bumbling around like the couple of dorks that they are. It’s only one chapter. 100% would recommend. 

Author:  Sparseparsley https://archiveofourown.org/works/223962

Destiel, Actually - This is another super cute story, 5 chapters. Gabriel playing a singular role in putting Dean and Cas in awkward positions to push them together.  I fucking DIED at “oh, I am the sub” - needs context, but I guarantee you that you’ll laugh out loud...

Author:  Bexism  https://archiveofourown.org/works/399934/chapters/658398

The Smell Before the Rain - This was my first A/B/O - a big apology to all those who are into mpreg and whatnot, this was my lesson that I am not. this was not for me. Also - I’m a firm Cas (Alpha/Dom) believer, and i’m good with switch Cas, but it’s hard for me to take him being the full Omega here, when paired with the rest I just couldn’t do it. I finished it, but, not my thing. I know now. 

Author: jscribbles https://archiveofourown.org/works/22355230/chapters/53406127

Crazy Diamonds - This is another short one, only 3 chapters - it’s a body swap for Dean, 4x02 him and 2018 him swap places (assumption that 2018 him is “with” Cas).  It’s a super cute little story. 

Author:  pantheon_of_discord https://archiveofourown.org/works/16151642/chapters/37738631

The Breath of All Things - Wheelchair!Dean / Volunteer!Cas.  This is a lovely story, typical Dean self-hatred etc. Triggering for those with suicide warnings. It had me in tears at the end. There’s a really spectacular quote near the end that I found so romantic I screen grabbed it. 

Author:  KismetJeska https://archiveofourown.org/works/994750/chapters/1967519

Kind of a Forever Deal - SummerCamp!AU This is just a really cute and fluffy summer camp AU.  Which is so different from 91W (That’s right, check the author)! I was a little disappointed with the ending, but otherwise really enjoyed this all the way through and was loving all the discovery and young characterizations of all the characters. 

Author: komodobits https://archiveofourown.org/works/999291/chapters/1978478

Everytown, USA - Best way I can break this one down? Wanderer!Dean (listless and without a place in the world, he ends up in a small town...), Twin!Cas (that leads to some fun things). There are a number of points where you’re gonna yell at Dean for doing stupid shit (that are very much in character for him to do), you think, well, yes, obviously you’re going to do that you silly fucking boy [affectionate]; but whyyy? (but we know). 

Author: aileenrose https://archiveofourown.org/works/1797559/chapters/3854836

Chalk and Chainmail - HighSchool!AU, Cas is an artist, Dean LARP’s - it’s cute and angsty. 

Author:  lemonsorbae https://archiveofourown.org/works/804704/chapters/1517551

A Little Patience - Ok. you want smut? This is your story. You want Kink? This is your story.  I actually did not finish this. It got a little carried away in my opinion. It was VERY panty kink oriented (which, while essentially canon isn’t really my kink) so, if you want that Panty Kink on full display? Go forth and enjoy! it  is thirty something chapters, I got to the mid-twenties I Think. 

Author: riseofthefallenone https://archiveofourown.org/works/1750058/chapters/3739232

Control - I REALLY ENJOYED THIS. Which is saying a lot for someone who has already admitted that a Subby Cas isn’t really my HC - so to so thoroughly enjoy a Sub!Cas story? (maybe it’s the tattooes...*wink*). It’s an AU where Cas is the head of a company - Dean is a callboy I guess, for lack of a better term. Just read it.

Author: dothraki_shieldmaiden  https://archiveofourown.org/works/31156601/chapters/76993217

More (I copy pasted the next lot from my google doc, I’ll flush them out later - no i wont...)

Teach Me (short) - movie night in the bunker, things get a little carried away   Author:  Chiyume  https://archiveofourown.org/works/5961327

You Light the Spark (in my bonfire heart) (short) - when cas doesn't realize that dean is unaware of his feelings, super short, super cute                      Author: noangelsinthegarrison https://archiveofourown.org/works/1193910 

Communication Breakdown (short/cockles) - dean ends up in Jensen's head while he films the confession scene, no sexual content Author: jujubiest   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29669601/chapters/72951339

Look What You Made Me Do (short/cockles) -      -  Vegas Con 2020 / jensen comes out with a song     - cute short - no sexual content Author:  green_blue_heller https://archiveofourown.org/works/30251592 Full House (short/cockles) - reimagined version of the rented house story - putting it in order (so to speak). funny / cute / fluffy not explicit   Author: n_nami  https://archiveofourown.org/works/30855827

Cyber Sex (short/cockles) - anastiel https://archiveofourown.org/works/31467086      - shameless post GISH Fest zoom call porn      - Short (very short)

It's Complicated (cockles) - gail_morgan https://archiveofourown.org/works/31434938/chapters/77747519       The GISHtake (short/cockles) - MellyCrazyCoconut https://archiveofourown.org/works/31508099     - cute short post GISH zoom     - oops "babe, really?"  

(10.02.2021 updated) Since last update: New reads - Fuck i’m gonna be here all day - there’s not gonna be as much gonna be NO detail in these breakdowns...sorry! This has now just become a “what i’ve read list” as opposed to a Rec list...

Love, All Alike (Pt. 1 Love, All Alike) - Phantoms_and_Foxgloves   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4555599/chapters/10370646                             - Though The Stars Walk Backward (pt 2 Love, All alike) - Phantoms_and_Foxgloves

And this, your living kiss - opal_bullets   https://archiveofourown.org/works/18083927/chapters/42744872

Come On, Let's Strike a Match (Domination and Submission: a love story pt 1) - anyrei & queerwerewolf ***   https://archiveofourown.org/works/25722478/chapters/62458810    - Playing With Fire (D&S: a love story pt 2)    - We Kiss and the Flames Get Higher (D&S: a love story pt 3)     - Sparking That Old Flame (D&S: a love story pt 4) 

Cinderwings - bendingsignpost Cinderella!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/12847041/chapters/29336421

Linden - fleeceframe Swan!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33126730/chapters/82236118

No Netflix, No Chill (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28764966

Can't Drink You Away (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28785792 

Jensen Totally (Does Not!) Snore (short RPF) - Dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30315717

Dean Ships It (short) - dorian_they   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30349434

All about control - wingless   https://archiveofourown.org/works/9151930/chapters/20791243

Aesthetics in Autoerotica (pt 1 Aesthetics in Autoerotica) - relucant   https://archiveofourown.org/works/3885544                                                             - The Ties that Bind (pt 2 Aesthetics in Autoerotica) - relucant

Let's take a drive - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32581027/chapters/80819581 

Enchanted ink - castielslostwings TattooArtist!Dean TattooArtist!Castiel AU ***   https://archiveofourown.org/works/23043622/chapters/55109530

The bones beneath our skin - darknessbound   https://archiveofourown.org/works/24633754/chapters/59515804

The Plot (RPF) - Castiel_Left_His_Mark_On_Me   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2795588/chapters/6274970

The Gentle Force with which you Take Me (RPF) - Phoenix_Ascended   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32110120/chapters/79549183

According to all known laws of Life (Pt. 1 Cursed Metaphors) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29207901                                                          - and he's back (with a mind of his own) (pt. 2 Cursed Metaphors) - sobsicles

Six hundred sundays (and many more) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31158776

Aching in the Absence of you - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31832977/chapters/78811378

gorging myself on you, still can’t get full (insatiable) (Short) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32203291

memories bring back memories (bring back you) - sobsicles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/24022945/chapters/57796885

Dream Come True (short) - bendingsignpost   https://archiveofourown.org/works/28071159

tall grass - aeli_kindara   https://archiveofourown.org/works/13127040/chapters/30030726

asunder (Short) - rageprufrock https://archiveofourown.org/works/62115

Apheresis - bendingsignpost BloodDonor!AU **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32674783/chapters/81056680

we always were but never knew it - frightfullyrude   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32698324/chapters/81119503

In this Louisiana Bar (Short) - fleeceframe   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31764487

The Hitchhiker's Guide to Alternate Universes - n_nami   https://archiveofourown.org/works/32687929/chapters/81092785

my heart a compass - lagaudiere https://archiveofourown.org/works/28629951

Unsound Inverses - sp8ce (not complete)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29836881/chapters/73413300

The Jensen Mistake (RPFish) - fellshish   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31950169

tell me about the dream (Pt. 1 Kids are coming home) - playedwright   https://archiveofourown.org/works/27984813/chapters/68544450

It's handy to know (FIMMF Themed ;)) - RosaMarloes   https://archiveofourown.org/works/31761322

So Says The Sword - komodobits AngelTrueform!AU**   https://archiveofourown.org/works/12597892/chapters/28695592

Communication Breakdown (RPFish)- darkshrimpemotions (jujubiest)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/29669601/chapters/72951339

Carry You Home - Casloveshisfreckles   https://archiveofourown.org/works/26982637/chapters/65862916

In the Shadow of your Wings - Enochian Things (Salr323)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/7531294/chapters/17121655

When Harry Met Sally (RPF) (Pt. 1 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood   https://archiveofourown.org/works/7622347/chapters/17351845    - Eight Dildos (RPF) (Pt. 2 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood    - Attention, Please (RPF) (Pt. 3 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood             - Boat Trip (RPF) (Pt. 4 When Harry Met Sally ‘verse) - mnwood

A Winter's Tale - NorthernSparrow   https://archiveofourown.org/works/2654327/chapters/5930561

A Close Shave - NorthernSparrow https://archiveofourown.org/works/3090167

r/supernatural - renrub (short) https://archiveofourown.org/works/27626783

sam reads destiel fics - rebshome (short - funny!)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33721624

Angel Cookies - noxsoulmate Chirstmas!AU **  https://archiveofourown.org/works/11729640/chapters/26427765

Under The Midnight Sun - NorthernSparrow Arctic!AU **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/16690645/chapters/39143677

Bron-Yr-Aur - mrbluesky (Short) https://archiveofourown.org/works/28225335

The Dean Winchester Beat Sheet - saltyfeathers   https://archiveofourown.org/works/19258594/chapters/45800209

The Meaning On My Skin - saltnhalo   https://archiveofourown.org/works/18005378/chapters/42538133

Red Right Hand (Pt. 1 Murder Ballads)  - Duckyboos   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4306110/chapters/9760008    - Are you the One that I've been waiting for? (pt. 2 Murder Ballads) - Duckyboos   

Riptides - sharkfish   https://archiveofourown.org/works/13230426/chapters/30263556

Damn Fine Ride - Cimorene105 (pt 1 - rodeo) Cowboy!AU** (I’m a horse girl, sue me...)  https://archiveofourown.org/works/14342340    - My Face Just Does This, Sometimes - Cimorene105 (pt. 2 rodeo)    - The Kinkiest Thing I've Ever Done- Cimorene105 (pt 3 rodeo)    - All Signs Point to Love - Cimorene105 (pt. 4 rodeo)    - Monster Love - Cimorene105 (pt. 5 rodeo)    - My Man, The Siren - Cimorene105 (pt. 6 rodeo)    - A Pain in My Ass - Cimorene105 (pt. 7 rodeo)

Astrolabe (terra incognita pt 1) - reluctantabandon, Winter_of_our_Discontent   https://archiveofourown.org/works/3348812/chapters/7326794    - Drollery (terra incognita pt 2) - reluctantabandon Winter_of_our_Discontent    - Rubrication (terra incognita pt 3) - reluctantabandon Winter_of_our_Discontent

Go Down With This Ship - PorcupineGirl   https://archiveofourown.org/works/8023642/chapters/18370474

Fire and Ice - Castielslostwings (Firefighter/Paramedic AU!) **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/23286295/chapters/55768486

The Structural Similarities of Hunters and Onions - Faster_Than_the_Speed_of_Sound (Short)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/33383101

Castiel Novak's Office, This is Dean - emmbrancsxx0   https://archiveofourown.org/works/22411336/chapters/53545840

Out of the Deep (out of the deep pt. 1) - riseofthefallenone - MERMAID AU! **   https://archiveofourown.org/works/548878/chapters/977676

Dean (and Cas') Top 13 Zepp Traxx - pantheon_of_discord   https://archiveofourown.org/works/10909440/chapters/24256989

I'll Be Good - LittleAngelCassie   https://archiveofourown.org/works/4118334/chapters/9282234

Kenosis - CastielsCarma (Short - part of Destiel ABC collection)   https://archiveofourown.org/works/30411720

#fics #fic recs #fanfiction #ao3 #cockles #destiel #dean and cas #jensen and misha #one track mind #supernatural #please send me recs #read more fics #this is my new obsession

[blackcherrykiss]

BLOOD BOUNDARIES - Enhypen OT7 Fanfic (ch.4)

[CH.1] [CH.2] [CH.3]  previous chapters

[CH.5] next chapter (NOW AVAILABLE!)

genre: vampire au, romance, drama, mystery, thriller

note: written inspired by enhypen's storyline, given-taken lyrics & teasers. please keep in mind all members are apart of this fanfic and the main theme is mystery/drama!

...

"Y/N?" Jungwon blinks between wide stares.

You immediately move off of Jaeyun, pushing him aside in a race toward Jungwon, "I was just about to head to the dining hall... I just happened to stumble into Jaeyun..." You lie to upsell the situation. You were actually relieved to see Jungwon, feeling somewhat safer now that he was around

"Are you alright?" He tilted your head in every direction, scanning every angle of your profile up and down.

"Why wouldn't I be...?" You grab ahold of his ice-cold hands and pull them away from your face, "It's not like I got in some fistfight with him. I'm just really hungry right now so don't stop me unless you're coming with me." You whine, glancing back to where Jaeyun stood, seeing nothing but an empty space.

"My class isn't even over, I just went to go to the bathroom." He stretched a hand up to hook onto the nape of his neck, "Just go eat, I'll catch up to you later."

I

You're checking every other person who enters the dining hall, impatient to see Jungwon as you eat quietly. You only see your roommates enter the hall, approaching your table after picking up some food along the way.

"Y/N! Where did you eat this morning? We saw you go off to some boy. Do you have some secret relationship?" Your roommate Dahee gushes, interrupting your bird watching.

"No? I didn't even get to eat breakfast. I had some business with Jungwon." You say, hoping to clean up the painted picture she must've had. You turn to look at her, seeing your two other roommates in the distance; Hyesun and Nana.

"Oh, that was Jungwon?  We couldn't see his face from where we were." She tapped on the bottom of her chin to think, "Jungwon huh? You should be careful with him, he's getting really popular amongst the lower classman." She said as both Hyesun and Nana sat down with their steel trays that clung against the table.

"Yeah, I noticed that too... Wonder why." You tilted your head from side to side, trying to come up with any logical explanation. It's obvious Jungwon was visually attractive but if that was the reason, wouldn't he have been popular a long time ago?

"Probably because he's recently been seen with those guys." Nana side-eyed to her left, signalling all of you to turn your heads and focus on exactly who you were expecting; Jaeyun, Heeseung and Kim Sunoo.

Immediately you looked away from the table full of boys, trying to make zero eye contact with any of them. "But Jungwon has always been associated with them? Right?" You second guess yourself.

"Has he? I've only seen him hang around with them recently..." Nana looks at you with a funny remark.

"But Jungwon told me they're roommates, so I'm sure they were close from long ago." You chuckle in confusion.

"Wait what? Jungwon is roommates with Heeseung? But you can only be roommates with people in the same year as you." Nana pinches at the bottom of her lips, "That's very interesting," She scoffed in amusement as she pieced the puzzle pieces together for you. "I don't know what kind of person Jungwon is but he must be lying to you. Heeseung is a senior, Jungwon is a freshman."

You could only ask yourself how and why Jungwon was truly associated with those boys, was it that complicated that he needed to lie about it? Combing your fingers through the roots of your hair, you bury your head tightly into your arms in an attempt to shut your thoughts off.

Nana sighed in pity while wrapping her arm around you, "I never trusted those pretty boys and the people involved with them anyways. They've got some dirty secret, I just know it."

You think about what Nana had just said, trying to comprehend the scenario in your head full of mush. "I think I need to ask Jungwon about this... He's been keeping so many things from me, I'm gonna go look for him and sort things out. I'll explain what's going on later with you guys." You excuse yourself from the table, straightening out your skirt as you stood.

II

You strut across the dim corridors towards the hushed library at the very end of the passage. You usually found Jungwon in the library if he wasn't with friends, reading all alone at the same table between the shelves where he wasn't visible to the naked eye. You stand tall as you peer through the glass window and into the seemingly soulless library. Creeping through the wide-open doors, you squeeze yourself along the narrow shelves in search of Jungwon before you hear a quarrel.

"Not right now Sunghoon! I have a volleyball practice meet right now!" You recognize the voice that shouts in a whisper. You instantly duck your head down, peaking through the crevices of the thick wood bookshelves, letting your eyes adjust to see through the thin space.

"But I need it. I need you." You see Sunghoon tug Kyungeun closer. You began to blush a bit at the cheesy line. So this is the guy who gave her a hickey? Could this be her boyfriend?

Whatever you had walked into, it was dramatic and probably something you should have been listening to. Your thoughts continue to switch between whether or not to turn back around to leave the two "lovebirds" alone or stay until they left.

"Sunghoon, was yesterday not enough?" Kyungeun huffed, shaking off his grip. "I thought we agreed this can't be happening during school." Kyungeun controlled her volume.

"But I'm telling you that I'm impatient right now!" Sunghoon rubbed his forehead in annoyance as you reverse your steps back out of the entrance of the library. Trying your very best not a single step or trace of you was seen.

"Sunghoon I have a practice in a few minutes! What if you get caught?!" She repeated this time louder, making you feel awful for listening to their argument.

Running out the last few steps away from the door, you finally breathe normally, exhaling properly after sneaking out so quietly. Still amazed by the fact Kyungeun was seeing Sunghoon you look up to see Jaeyun leaned up against the wall right beside the window of the library. Before you gasp, you cover your mouth in terror. You blink in disbelief as you pull Jaeyun to a safer spot in the hallway, away from the crime scene so that Sunghoon and Kyungeun couldn't suspect what you both had heard.

"Spying on somebody?" Jaeyun smirks while sucking on the side of his lower lip.

"No? I was just looking for Jungwon! What are you doing here?!" You snap defensively out of the great startlement he had just caused you.

"Saw you leave the dining hall and followed you here." He admits casually, "It's funny how you keep running into this kind of stuff, isn't it?"

"Hm? Kyungeun and Sunghoon?" You question his choice of wording, "I just happened to bump into a couple arguing so I felt bad." You say a little unconfident about what you had just heard.

"Couple? Mmmm... Wouldn't call it that," He said in the midst of choking up on laughter, "You just don't get it, do you?"

"So they're just friends? Or are their feelings just mutual?" You don't even bother to look into Jaeyun's eyes when you say that, embarrassed at your second assumption. You were paranoid that Kyungeun and Sunghoon could've heard you both even from such a far distance.

"It'll all make sense once you connect the dots. Do you want to know our secret that bad?"

"Look, you accused me of spying but you're the one spying on me. Are you worried that I'll find out?" You spit, hiding how flustered you actually were. "Let's just get out of here before one of them exits the library." You cut him off before he can even begin a sentence. "Whatever you say, darling." He spins his head around, already making a move back to the route you both came. You follow him shortly, contemplating whether or not to ask Kyungeun about her relationship with Sunghoon.

Was it too personal to ask? Or perhaps Kyungeun wasn't telling you for a reason.

"You're still thinking about them?" Jaeyun interrupts your thoughts, breaking the silence created from deep concentration. His steps slowed down a bit, giving you time to catch up and walk beside him.

"Yes! I'm still thinking of them... I'm close with Kyungeun and she never mentioned she had something going on with Sunghoon, that's all."

"Secrets are secrets for a reason." He commented mysteriously as you both reached the entrance doors of the dining hall, the journey coming to a quick end.

"Hey, I'm going to continue to look for Jungwon, you should go." You insisted. "I really don't want people to see us together, don't take it personally..." You say in a mellow manner. Although Jaeyun had been cocky and nosy toward you, in a way you were drawn to his subtle company. You weren't going to keep up the rude act, you wanted a decent relationship with Jungwon's friends. Maybe if you befriended him, you could get more information.

...

You decide to check the courtyard for Jungwon, forgetting what exactly you needed to ask him along the way. You step out into the quiet outside, searching for Jungwon under the ash sky. The smell of an oncoming storm fills the passing breeze in the humid air as you scanned the surface-level of ground.

"Jungwon?" You whisper unsure of the black-haired boy who sits on the stairs peacefully admiring the soft forest in the distance.

Jungwon turns toward your direction, the blazer of his uniform off to the side while his charcoal bangs and collar sway in the gentle wind. You're relieved to see the familiar pair of cat eyes that could only belong to him glimmer like pearls under the reflections of the clouds.

"I've been looking all over for you..." You laugh at yourself while taking a seat on the step-up stair from his. "It seems you didn't eat at all today, you okay?" You adjust yourself and fix your eyes forward to where he was looking before.

"I'm just not hungry. Sorry I didn't go to you at lunch as I said I would." Jungwon leaned his broad shoulders back until they rested against the step you sat on.

"You always say you're not hungry." You stretch out your legs, tucking your cold hands under your thighs while the bright periwinkle sky slowly disappeared.

"The sky is pretty, isn't it?" Jungwon whispers while looking over his shoulder to look at you, the corners of lifting just a millimetre upwards.

"Really pretty." You reply looking at his face that lit up into a creamy lilac colour under the sky. His eyelids relaxed lazily along with the rest of his features. His delicate blush face bringing you a small bit of joy. "I-I think we should go inside before it rains." You suggest, jarring your fluttering heart from his sweet face.

"We still have a few minutes." Jungwon closed his eyes, sinking himself into a position comfortable enough to sleep in, "Why'd you come looking for me?"

You finally remembered what you were going to ask but you felt it would ruin the mood. You knew too well if you spoke of the roommate situation with Heeseung or what you had witnessed with Sunghoon, it would only take away from the calm moment Jungwon was living in. "It's not that important, I'll ask another day."

Jungwon changed the subject after a short pause, not questioning you any further, "Are you going home for the long weekend?" In your boarding school, you frequently got long weekends to go home and see your family although some kids would stay on campus and hang around.

"Oh, the one in 2 weeks? Yeah, I'm thinking of going home. I miss my family a bit... You?"

"That's great, you should really go home." You took his answer as a way of him trying to avoid talking about himself. "I'm kind of tired... Sorry if I'm dozing off." He admitted in a sad lazy tone with his eyelids pressed together.

"Need a pillow?" You say while moving down so you were now sitting on the same step as him.

Jungwon lazily winked an eye open, "Pillow?"

"Y-you can rest your head on my lap for a few minutes..." You removed your bag, not daring to look him in the eyes when you said that, "Not sure if it'll be any more comfortable..." You felt embarrassed offering the gesture, but you could tell he was down by the way he spoke. He was less energetic than usual so it was clear to you that something was upsetting him.

He let out a lazy chuckle without opening his mouth, sitting up straight to look at you.

Before you could even catch being face to face, you took his laughter as a rejection toward the offer, burning with embarrassment, "Nevermind... I think I'll go to my next class early, don't be late for yours.." You quickly slung back on your bag, ready to take off that moment.

"Don't go... Just stay..." Jungwon held onto the side of your bag, moving his hand until it pinched at your fingers.

You felt a certain sickness eat at the bottom of your stomach as you hesitated to sit back down, but it wasn't sick with awkwardness or embarrassment.

"I was just surprised you offered." Jungwon covered his face with the back of his hand shyly as you turned toward him.

"Well, I'm about to take my offer back." You sat back down slowly, shaking off the random feelings that were flying between the two of you.

Jungwon instantly scooted over to you, shifting all his stuff with him. He spent no time stalling as he laid his head onto your lap, his dark chocolate hair tickling your knees.

"You must be really tired." You mutter. Your eyes watching as strands of his hair dance across his forehead from the soft breeze. You were tempted to brush the hairs away but felt you would be overstepping the line you had as friends. Instead, you reached over to his scrunched up blazer and draped it over him as a blanket.

A few minutes passed as you started to feel a wave of tiredness wash over you. You starting to become tired enough to fall asleep as you existed in the ambient noises of the courtyard. It seemed he nice sounds of the olive trees brushing against one another or the dandelion coloured birds that flew between them were a lullaby. Time had just felt too easy on you at that given moment.

A cold droplet of the sky's tears hit the back of your hand, a clear indication of what was to come next. "Jungwon it's beginning to rain, we should head inside... You know how fast it takes for the rain to fall harder." You shook him a bit, knowing he most definitely could not be in the REM stage of sleep.

He groaned, still not batting an eye open until a droplet hit his upper cheek near the side of his temple. He began to sit up in a haze, the back of his head in shambles and his blazer half covering him. "Let's go?" He said stretching his arms up, still settled on the staircase while you stood on both feet.

The rain started to slowly intensify into a shower, the droplets still thin. "I'm not trying to get soaked here..." You sigh, lifting your bag above your head as a shield from the rain as Jungwon finally stood up properly, putting on his blazer instead of using it to cover his head. "What are you doing? Use your coat to protect yourself from the rain." You nagged like a mother as you could feel the rain hit your bare legs.

"No, it's too late. It will dry." He slid on his backpack as you patiently waited for him. "But if I'm going to get rained on, shouldn't you as well?" He said while trying to pull your bag off from its placement over your head. "HEY! No! Let's not do that?" You held tighter onto the bag, sprinting off toward doors.

"I was just joking!" He yelled from the distance as you took cover under the entrance roof. ... "Did you not know it was going to rain?" Your teacher poked her head from behind an unfamiliar student.

"I sort of did, I just stayed a little too long outdoors," You mentioned while you sat down at your respective seats.

"Well now that everyone is here, I'd like to announce we have a new student who just transferred here."

#enhypen fanfic #yang jungwon fanfic #lee heeseung fanfic #enhypen jay fanfic #sunghoon fanfic #enhypen jake fanfic #sunoo fanfic #enhypen niki fanfic #enhypen imagines #enhypen imagine #enhypen au #jungwon #heeseung #park jongseong #park sunghoon #sim jaeyun #kim sunoo

[nickyhemmick]

Hi, be careful what information you post on the conflict as it’s not as one sided as you’re making it out to be. Israel is being attacked as well. I’m not saying everything Israel is doing is correct, by no means is that true. But innocent people are getting hurt on both sides and that’s not okay. A lot of the posts I’ve seen have just been thinly valid antisemitism, so be careful the ones you reblog as well. You can be anti Israel without being vitriolic to the innocent people who live there. Palestine is not as innocent as everyone claims they are, but they don’t deserve to be kicked out of there homes either. Israel is complicated but innocents don’t deserve to be killed either. A lot of people post about Palestine blindly, I just encourage you to look into both sides a bit more and not make it out to be a situation with one right answer. If it was then this problem would have been solved a long time ago.

~ A Very Stressed American Jew

blah blah blah both sides blah blah blah Palestine isn’t innocent blah blah.

For the stuff about anti-semitism: yeah I agree. People can be posting things that are anti Semitic while pretending to be anti-Israel. I’ve reblogged stuff abt that fact, too. And I always try to make sure what I’m reblogging is talking abt Israel’s cruelty and doesn’t mention anything anti-Semitic. If you see something that I’ve reblogged and you feel it’s anti-Semitic, then let me know.

Second of all: the only 2 sides there are is the oppressor and the oppressed. Palestinians are the fucking oppressed, and I say this as a Palestinian (and an American!) If you want to see how “complicated” this problem is then go onto Twitter and watch the videos Palestinians are sharing and THEN tell me we aren’t innocent. Like bro, throwing rocks or rockets in SELF DEFENSE is 1000000% justified and something I will always defend. Don’t go to Israeli media (which, anyway, doesn’t mind showing you the gang beat-ups of Palestinians lol)

Also, while you are saying there are Israeli citizens that are innocent (which yes, 100% true) you seem to ignore the Israeli citizens out in the streets calling for lynching of Palestinians, entering homes to kill fathers in front of their children, raping the women, forcing themselves into Palestinian homes, and calling for the death of all Arabs, all with the help of the IDF and police. Don’t fucking tell me the citizens are all innocent, many of them are part of this and have been for generations. They are just as complicit as their government in this. I don’t care if they were brainwashed into all the hate they feel, they still are out there adding more fire to the problems. (And NO, I am not referring to IDF soldiers who are forced into duty in this).

The US has brainwashed you into thinking that Palestinians are horrible, that there are two equal sides, that it is a very complicated mind-boggling situation that can’t be solved! That’s all false. I implore you to look at Palestinan sources, both videos, pictures and websites like decolonizepalestine dot com. You already have some awareness of the reality from your ask, but you telling me there’s “both sides” is telling me you have some more work to do. This has been a 73 year old war. Simple. Israel, when attacked, has the Iron Dome, their citizens have bomb shelters, they have a million other protections Palestinians don’t. Palestinians, when attacked, have none of that. They suffer. They die. They get raped. We always pay the larger cost in whatever rocket fire is expelled. Netanyahu said he will bomb Gaza until there is silence. Yeah, that totally sounds like a complicated situation!

No. That simply won’t do. And if you do want to do your readings, do not read Zionist powered publications like the New York Times and the New York post and the like. I repeat that I agree that there is a lot of anti-Semitism in anti-Israel posts, but none of my posts have reflected that, and if they have let me know and I will take them down. This isn’t a religious matter and I understand that, there are Palestinian Jewish ppl as well! They are also suffering under this racist colonial rule

But Palestinians are innocent. We are. We one MILLION percent are. Just because we are fighting back after generations of colonialism, abuse, murder and rape doesn’t make us any less innocent. It makes us fucking fighters for our rights, because a lot of people don’t give a fuck about us and haven’t for 7 decades. Don’t forget that Israel is the instigator of the violence, all the way from 1948. Israel is being attacked because we’re fed up, and it’s not like we’re making much damage anyway, so don’t try to make it out to be that there are both sides that are equal here. Because that isn’t true.

#tala gets asks #anon #palestine tag #plus theres a lot of islamophobia in both pro israel posts & israeli propaganda #also read articles from previous idf soldiers that are now palestinian activits #activists* i have a few if u want them #and also i have BEEN to palestine a handful of times #ive BEEN to jerusalem #ive seen some of this crap with my own eyes #so dont u dare come here and tell me we arent innocent #we are #i have family in the middle of this conflict rn #my aunt who is a doctor is sheikh jarrah who is seeing all this horror #i know how one sided it is #do u? #free. palestine.

[isolemnlyswearpevensie]

Beyond Our Dreams | Remus Lupin x Reader Soulmate AU

Warnings: None

Time/Era: Marauders Era, Aged 19

Word count: 2.3k

Summary: Remus Lupin finally gets to meet his American soulmate, Y/N, after seeing eachother every night in their dreamscape. 

Request: can you do a remus lupin x gender neutral reader soulmate au where they see each other in their dreams

A/N: I adore Remus so much. He’s such a special character to me. So, thank you for the request! Enjoy! I also attached my Remus Lupin playlist, which is full of songs that remind me of this perfect boi :) Check it out if you want! 

masterlist | my remus lupin playlist | read on ao3

The apartment they chose to meet at was always the same; it was a small room with a comfy, forest green couch, a cozy bed, a small kitchenette, and a door that led to a bathroom. It was rather plain as well, with dark red walls and a plush carpet below their feet. On one of the walls, there was a large window that overlooked a calm city. The normal hustle and bustle of city life was extinguished by a heavy downpour. 

While most people made their dreamscapes extravagant and complicated, as it is their mind after all, Remus and Y/N found comfort in the simplicity. The pair just needed a comfortable spot to talk and get to know eachother. 

“And then Lily just sort of dropped the bomb,” Remus stated, sitting on the couch opposite of Y/N. His long fingers wrapped around a white mug and he held his tea close to his body. 

“I can’t believe she’s pregnant!” Y/N had her legs crossed and a plate of chocolate chip cookies situated in her lap. “We haven’t even met yet, but people our age are already having kids.” 

Remus heartily chuckled, raising his mug to his lips and taking a sip. “It’ll happen in due time, darling. Besides, it’s nice to have you to myself without outside influences,” He coughs. “My friends skewing your views on me.” 

“I know your friends are lovely, based on how you speak so fondly of them.” Y/N took a big bite of one of the chocolate chip cookies. It was chewy and gooey, making it absolutely delicious. “Why are dream cookies so good? Like, seriously, these things are to die for.” 

“Because they’re a figment of your imagination. They can be as yummy or as disgusting as you make them to be.” Remus pulled at the collar of his gray t-shirt, making the seams rip. “Do you ever wish I was more, I don’t know, exciting?” 

“What do you mean?” Chocolate smudged on the corners of her mouth.

Remus grinned and licked his thumb, rubbing it over her delicate skin to clean her face. “I mean, our dream world is a one-bedroom apartment and all we ever do is talk. I don’t know, I hear Sirius has a rollercoaster in his dreamscape. I fell dull in comparison.” 

Y/N fondly smiled at her soulmate, moving so she was sitting directly next to him. “Rollercoasters are overrated. I like the comfort our little apartment gives us, it’s nice and warm in here and I have you next to me.” She set the cookies on the coffee table in front of the couch. “We don’t need to go on extravagant adventures, you seem to have enough of those when you’re awake.” 

“You deserve better, though. Not a guy in his late teens that is constantly tired and would rather sit on a couch drinking tea than going on a rollercoaster.” 

“I deserve you, and you are more than enough for me.” Y/N sighed, moving Remus’ hair out of his eyes. He couldn’t feel her physically, but it was still a nice gesture. “I’m not exactly itching to go on grand adventures. That’s what meeting you is for.” 

“You’re only 5,437 miles away, anyway.” Remus’ mouth twitched into a sad smile. “That’s nothing.” 

“Hey, it’s better than 5,438 miles.” 

“You got me there.” 

~

“What would you do if I came to London and surprised you?” Y/N laid her head on Remus’ thigh while he moved his hand through her hair, trying to imagine what it felt like. 

“I’d probably get rather quiet and not know what to do if I’m being honest,” Remus observed how Y/N’s locks flowed through his fingers like water and how it contrasted against the forest green upholstery of the couch. 

“Maybe let out a few cuss words?” 

“Why are you so obsessed with me cussing?” 

“Your accent is hot, especially when you say ‘fuck.’ I like to hear it.” Y/N smiled cheekily and watched Remus’ pupils dilate. 

“Fuck,” The words fall off his tongue with his Welsh accent. Much of the Welsh had faded, due to living at Hogwarts and now London, but it was still very apparent in his speech.  Y/N giggled and squirmed. 

“Yeah, like that. Sometimes you just slip it into casual conversations and I have to compose myself.” 

“Americans are weird, it’s just an accent.” 

“No, it’s not just an accent. It’s your accent so I like to hear it. Sue me!” Y/N threw her hands up in false anguish, lightly bumping Remus’ stomach. 

“You’re so dramatic, love.��� 

“I am not dramatic! Just every time I compliment my favorite person in the world he says I’m weird! Maybe you’re the weird one, Lupin!” 

“Fine, I’m the weird one. Does that make you happy?” His voice sounded exasperated, but he was staring down at her with the fondest expression.

“Extremely.” 

~

“Do you think Sirius, James, and Peter would like me?” Y/N sat on the counter of the dream kitchenette. 

“They already do like you, dear.” Remus stood between her legs with his hands resting on her thighs. With her sitting so high, they were almost the same height. “Why?” 

“Well they’re important to you, and you’re important to me, so I want them to like me. It would suck if your friends hated me.” 

“You don’t have to worry about that. They even have a nickname for you,” Remus looked away, his cheeks turned slightly red. This piqued Y/N’s attention. 

“A nickname? What is it?”

“Button.” Remus’ cheeks were dusted a light rose color and his ears were bright red. 

“Button? Why Button?” 

“Well, a few years ago we were all going around and describing our soulmates. I said that you were as cute as a button and I guess the name stuck.” 

Butterflies erupted in Y/N’s stomach and she planted a kiss on his cheek. “Why can’t I just apparate to you again?” 

“We talked about this, love. You’ve never been here and I’ve never been there so you can’t apparate straight here. And the plane ride between us is almost 11 hours.” 

“Fucking hell.” Y/N sighed in frustration. 

“Fucking hell, indeed.” 

~

“I did something, and you have to promise not to be mad at me.” Y/N paced around the kitchenette while Remus lounged on the couch. His head shot up at her words. 

“What did you do?” His mind raced a mile a minute and he prepared himself for the worst. Y/N probably found someone better than him and wanted to cut off contact. 

“It’s nothing bad, relax.” 

“Well if it’s not bad, why would I be mad?” Y/N sighed and sat next to him on the couch. 

“Well, in the real world I’m sort of on a plane to London right now.” 

Remus’ eyes bulged and he jumped off the couch. “You’re coming? Here? Really? Now?” 

“Well, I’ll be there in about four hours.” Remus was now pacing.

“Why didn’t you tell me?! Mine and Sirius’ flat is a wreck!” 

“I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to back out for a silly reason like a messy apartment.” Y/N stood and reached for her boy. “I love you and I couldn’t wait any longer.” 

“Four hours?” 

“Yes, four hours.And I need a ride from the airport.” 

~

Y/N stood atop the escalator and looked at the crowd below, scanning all the faces for her love. Her face crinkled when she didn’t see Remus but two young men holding a piece of cardboard with her name written in black marker on it. She realized that the two were, in fact, James Potter and Sirius Black. 

“Sirius and James?” She said walking up, suitcase in hand. Both were much taller than Y/N and extremely handsome, making her feel slightly uncomfortable under their gaze. Both young men grinned down at her. 

“Ah, you must be Button. Nice to know Remus talks about us enough for you to recognize our handsome faces,” Sirius exclaims, putting the cardboard under his arm and nudging James. “You’re even prettier than Rem described.”

Y/N rolled her eyes. “Well, you aren’t exactly hard to miss. Long hair, leather jacket, combat boots, overly flirty,” Y/N turns to James. “Glasses, The Beatles shirt, tired expression. Obviously, you’re James Potter and Sirius Black.” She smiles and pulls her hair behind her ear. “Congrats on the baby, by the way.” 

James beams, “Thanks! Kinda crazy considering the circumstances, but you know how it goes.” He takes Y/N’s luggage and starts walking towards the exit. “You threw Moony into quite a panic, you know. It was one of the best things I’ve seen in a while.” 

“It had to be done, he’s been putting it off for years. Something about not wanting me to be disappointed, whatever that means.” 

“Ah, classic moons. Glad you came though, really shakes up our daily schedule.” Sirius responds. The three make their way to a Volkswagon Beetle and James pops the trunk to put Y/N’s luggage inside. 

“Why didn’t he come and get me? Not that I mind the company, of course.” Sirius crawls into the back middle seat, leaving Y/N to sit shotgun with James driving. “Woah, I forgot it’s on the wrong side.”

“He pussied out, I’m sure you know how nervous he gets,” James pulled out onto the street and down the road. “And what’s on the wrong side?” 

“Your car and the road, James. It’s on the wrong side.” 

“It’s not on the wrong side, maybe you’re on the wrong side. Ever think of that?” He turned his head to look at her, the thick frame glasses on his face sliding down his nose. 

“See! You agree! I am currently on the wrong side!” Y/N giggled and hugged her backpack to her chest. 

Sirius also lets out a loud, bellowing laugh. Y/N felt as though she had known these two her entire life; in a way, she had. 

The three pulled into a parking structure and she exited the beetle. (The car, she had come to discover, was named Lennon, after John Lennon himself.) She hadn’t been nervous up until this moment, staring at the apartment door. James patted her shoulder and smiled. 

“It’ll be okay. He’s the same Remus you’ve been talking to for the past however many years.” 

“Yeah, if you even get him to talk,” Sirius pushes his way between the two and towards the door, lugging Y/N’s bag into the flat. He drops the luggage in the middle of the living room and flops onto the couch. “Oh, Moonbear, your lover is here! Get your fine ass out of your room, before I take it out here myself!” 

Y/N cautiously pads into the house, taking in the atmosphere of the home. It was very similar to their dreamscape, very small and sparsely decorated. However, the flat seemed to have 2 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms, as well as a few closets. The livingroom had various framed band posters hanging on the walls, as well as a big framed picture of the entire friend group. Y/N could point out who was who easily as she observed it. 

“Lily is so pretty,” She said aloud and pointed between two blondes. “Which one is Marlene and which one is Mary?” 

Sirius and James look at eachother and share a laugh. “Merlin, he really does talk about us.” James points at the girl with the big, poofy hair. “That one’s Marls, the other is Mary.” 

“Makes sense, since I’m assuming that’s Dorcas?” Y/N’s gaze moves from the blonde to a pretty brunette next to her. 

“Oi, Moons, I didn’t realize you spoke about us so much,” James says, making Y/N turn around. In all his glory, Remus Lupin stood in the living room, decked out in jeans, and a The Smiths shirt. He was perfectly imperfect, and Y/N’s entire body warmed. His gaze didn’t leave Y/N as James spoke but he allowed his jaw to grow slightly slack and his hands to pull his shirt down. 

“You’re even more beautiful in person, how is that possible?” His voice was breathy and light as if he was in complete awe. The light from the windows highlighted his cheekbones and made his features look unbelievably sharp, creating shadows that danced down his neck. He looked heavenly in absolutely every way possible, and this moment made her entire travel day worth it. Y/N blushed and stepped towards him. 

“Nice shirt, missed you at the airport, though.” 

Remus rolls his eyes and pulls his girl close to him. “Sorry ‘bout that, sunshine.” 

Y/N nestled her face into his chest, taking deep breaths of his cologne. He was even better than she expected, all the way down to the wool socks he wore. Remus’ hand came to gently stroke her hair before looking up to see his friends. Unsurprisingly, though, the living room was now empty and Sirius’ bedroom door was closed. 

“You smell so good, is that weird to say?” Y/N mumbles into the fabric of his shirt. “Like pine, and candy. I don’t know how to describe it.” She felt his chest vibrate as he laughed. 

“I can’t believe you’re finally here.” 

“Had’ta be sneaky, catch you off guard.” Y/N looked up into his eyes and glanced down to his lips. 

The soft look of admiration she had seen so many times crossed his features as he leaned down to capture her lips in a kiss. 

#remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #r j lupin #remus john lupin #professor lupin #the marauders #marauders era #marauders #marauders x reader #marauders x you #sirius black #sirius black x reader #remus lupin x you #sirius orion black #james potter #james potter x reader #james fleamont potter #hogwarts #first wizarding war #harry potter #harry potter x reader #the wizarding world of harry potter #the wizarding world #jk rowling #marauders fanfiction #marauder #marauders map #remus lupin x y/n #r. j. lupin

[mytrashcanlife]

Ashes to Ashes Jasper X Reader Part 3

After a few weeks the two new siblings had settled into the house. Alice was quickly becoming one of your best friends. She took you shopping, constantly, and insisted that even though you no longer had a date you were still going to prom and you were going to be the most sparkly thing there. Jasper on the other hand was never around, at least as far as you could tell. Every time you walked into a room he walked out of it. He didn’t look at you often and you returned the gesture because on the rare occasion you did lock eyes with him he looked like he wanted you six feet under. Alice insists that isn’t true and everyone else says he doesn’t hate you, but he hasn’t shown it at all. Little do you know that when you dance in the living room after convincing Edward to play the entertainer for the one-thousandth time, that he is just on the other side of the pillar in the house. Out of sight but soaking up every ounce of pure joy you give off. Having only felt constant negativity for a long time, your consistent positive emotions were a welcome change, but when you looked at him they turned to discomfort and fear, so he stayed out of your way. There was only one time he really felt you full of fear and concern when he wasn’t around, and it wasn’t a pretty sight.

Rosalie and Emmet had gone hunting and Rosalie had gotten much messier than usual due to Emmet’s hijinks. She thought she was sneaking into the house while you were away, but you saw her come in and go up the stairs. When she reaches the top of the stairs her eyes meet yours in horror.

“Oh my God Rosalie are you okay?”

“I’m fine. Emmet shot a deer and thought it would be funny to throw me at it. You know Emmet. Ha-ha.”

“Rose that doesn’t explain most of this blood are you hurt?”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. Tis but a flesh wound. I’m going to shower. I’ll be fine. Don’t worry”

You let her go, but not the incident. You bring it up to Emmet and Carlisle and nobody’s stories or explanations were adding up. Carlisle was definitely hiding something from you, and you were at your ropes end. You decided to confront Carlisle about all these issues, and it doesn’t go well. Jasper hears you yelling and goes to investigate. Still out of sight.

“Carlisle I am not some stupid little girl anymore. What aren’t you telling me?”

“(y/n) please just leave it alone. You’ll understand when you’re older.”

“When I’m older? Carlisle I’m an adult. I’ve graduated. Soon I’m going to have to go Out into the world by myself. How much older do I need to be?!”

“Much older!”

“Fine if you won’t tell me I’ll just ask aunt Jane.”

“NO. (y/n) please for your own good just drop it.”

“Carlisle Elizabeth Cullen”

“That’s not my middle name”

“It is now. You have dodged every question I have asked you for years. I didn’t press the issue because I assumed you would tell me when I was an adult, but now I’m eighteen, my boyfriend just dumped me because he found out you were my family, though you all despised him before that. And now I have two new family members that I know nothing about, who look nothing like any of you, one of which looks at me like he wants me dead for absolutely no reason, and I just found my sister trying to sneak upstairs, covered in blood that is most definitely not her own. I want answers Carlisle and I will get them if you won’t tell me I will find someone who will, AM I CLEAR?”

Jasper was still hidden out of sight. Carlisle knew he was there but (y/n) was oblivious. He expected emotions to be rolling off of her, Sadness and Fear among them, but despite the tone of voice she held she was completely calm, no rage just minor annoyance.

“(y/n) everything I have done I did for your safety. Now drop it.”

“Unbelievable.” After a brief pause you decide it’s no use fighting with him. “Emmet!”

Emmet appeared in the doorway. (y/n) knew he was there but she never took her eyes off of Carlisle’s. “What’s up (y/n)?”

“I’ll meet you, downstairs in five. We’re going climbing. You down?”

“Always.”

“Good.” You turned around and ran out of the kitchen and upstairs to your room to get ready.

The next few weeks were more difficult for Carlisle than he expected. Jasper as well. Your normal Happy demeanor had been replaced with complete indifference. You were on a strict schedule and you stuck to it. Never speaking to Carlisle, and never even glancing in Jasper’s direction. You were waiting. The other side of the family would be visiting soon, and you were going to get your answers one way or the other. Soon enough you were out in the field with your usual trinkets waiting for them.

“(y/n) child! It’s so good to see you again.”

“You too uncle Aro.” You smile weakly and give your usual hug. When you pull back Aro has noticed your change in demeanor. He knows but he asks anyway.

“What’s wrong?”

“Where do I even begin? Carlisle is keeping secrets from me and I’m worried. I’ve never given him reason not to trust me but so much has happened that doesn’t add up. He’s dodging my questions and insists for my own safety that I ‘drop it’ and just pretend nothing is wrong.”

“How about you go with Aunt Jane and I’ll talk to Carlisle?”

“If you can get him to stop being so weird by all means.”

You and Jane go back to the house up to your room and you tell Carlisle that Aro is waiting for him in the field and wants to talk.

“Aunt Jane I’m worried.”

“About what dear?”

“You have to promise not to freak out okay?”

“Of course.”

“well, I saw Rosalie a few weeks ago, sneaking upstairs covered in blood. She insists nothing is wrong, but it wasn’t her own. I mean I expect that kind of behavior from Emmet, but Rosalie isn’t one to get dirty you know?”

“That is strange. Anything else bothering you?”

“Yeah we have two new kids Carlisle just adopted and Alice is super sweet, she helps me cook, helps with my homework. She even helped me pick out a prom dress, But Jasper…He gives me the creeps. I swear he looks at me like he wants me dead.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know! I haven’t said two words to the guy, but the others insist he doesn’t hate me.”

“Well I’m sure once Aro talks to Carlisle, you’ll get some answers.”

“Thanks Jane. Hey, can I braid your hair?”

“Of course.” While you are happily braiding intricate patterns into Jane’s hair, the situation is much more tense out on the field. Carlisle already knows what’s coming but he’s not happy about it.

“Aro.”

“Carlisle. My niece is unhappy. She seems to think you’re hiding something from her”

“She’s not your niece. I still don’t know how she came up with that idea. You know what I’m hiding, and you know I can’t tell her.”

“I told you that this charade couldn’t last for forever. You will tell her.”

“Aro it’s your rule that we don’t tell humans about us.”

“I know. You will tell her, and she will turn.”

“She will not.”

“She will. I don’t care who does it or when, but she will turn, and if what I’m hearing about your new members is true I’d be willing to bet who does it.”

“Jasper has his issues but he’s doing much better. He won’t hurt her.”

“I Know. I know that he doesn’t want to hurt her.”

“He isn’t going to.”

“He’s an empath Carlisle haven’t you noticed anything different about (y/n)? or him?”

“He’s not controlling her emotions.”

“I know he’s not if he was she wouldn’t be so scared of him. But she is a constant beacon of joy. She makes Jane of all people smile. After the hell that kid has been through I’m sure he’s enjoying every second of relief her emotions can give him. I’m sure when her dog left her she was pretty upset too.”

“The entire relationship lasted a few weeks.”

“Carlisle you don’t think we keep tabs on that girl? She’s the only person to ever make every member of this family smile on a regular basis, and if anyone or anything threatens her we will take every pleasure in destroying that threat.”

“You’re attached to her? You wanted me to leave her for dead!”

“That was a long time ago Carlisle things have changed. Let me make myself very clear. One of you is going to turn her by the time she’s nineteen or I will do it myself.”

“You speak of threats to her happiness and then threaten it yourself. She would never want to be one of us. She would be miserable.”

“I don’t think so. And you may want to keep your voice down Jane is returning with her now.”

Carlisle turns to see her and Jane walking towards the field. Jane as usual with complicated braids throughout her hair. (y/n)’s smile drops as she walks closer to Carlisle refusing to meet his gaze.

“(y/n)! I trust you had fun with Jane?”

“As always.”

“Did you get our gift?”

“Yes. Thank you so much. It’s beautiful. I have it in my jewelry box at home.”

“Good.” Aro turns back to Carlisle “I trust we’ve come to an understanding. I’ll see you next year.”

“Bye.”

The two of them left and Carlisle walked back to the house with (y/n).

“Are you going to talk to me (y/n)?”

“Are you going to stop being so unnecessarily vague and stop dodging my questions?”

“There are things I can’t tell you”

“then no”

After a few more minutes of silence she spoke once more in exasperation.

“Can you at least tell me why Jasper hates me?”

“He doesn’t hate you.”

“Then why does he avoid me at all costs. Or stare at me like he wants me dead?”

“Ask him.”

“fine I will”

They walk the rest of the way back in silence. Once they were home she immediately ran up the stairs to her room and shut the door. Everything was too much of a headache right now. She just decided to go to sleep for now and deal with everything else in the morning. Meanwhile Carlisle decides it’s best to keep his conversation with Aro a secret from the rest of the family. He’d figure it out later.

#jasper #jasper cullen #jasper x reader #jasper cullen x reader #twilight #twilight fanfiction #twilight renaissance #twilight reverie

[ackerslut]

Prompt, Angst, The titan gets badly damaged and a lot of the crew are dead or injured, mariner goes AWOL from the cerritos to find out if boimler is okay and there's a scene with boimler unconscious on a biobed and Mariner is like "you have to live so I can feed you to an armus for leaving the cerritos!"

A/N: you sent this prompt ages ago, but the words just wouldn't happen lmao. So six months late and a few thousand words short, here you go:

ao3

Okay, so here’s the thing.

Beckett keeps files on everyone. Not physical files of course--too insecure and hackable (she should know). But a mental file. Still hackable if she runs into a telepath, but still slightly more secure from the rest of her coworkers.

It’s not as if they’re particularly like. Creepy files. She isn’t snooping into anyone’s actual physical file onboard or obtaining any info illegally. She just observes things and passively marks them for later. Tendi likes peanut-butter sandwiches. Janice gets her neck tattoos re-inked every few months. Captain Mom has a stick up her ass. That kind of thing.

It’s a fine tuned compartmentalization that’s useful in a variety of situations, whether it’s knowing what to say in a social situation or who to trust during a red alert (tip: always go with Rutherford, he’s anxious but the least likely to betray you and throw you out of an airlock. Bonus: he’s the most likely crew member on this trashcan to actually have a working idea).

Some mental files are incredibly detailed. For instance, the one on her mom is about as thick as a handbound copy of War & Peace and just as boring. Everything from her favorite flavor of ice cream to her first response to an emergency situation is in there-incredibly accurate and incredibly detailed. She’s sure her mom has a similar mental file on her as well, but resolutely does Not think about it.

Some mental files are almost empty. Ensign Gent’s toothbrush is pink. First Officer Ransom has nice abs I guess. That dude who’s name I can’t remember opened his third eye and ascended into the afterlife or something I wasn’t actually there Tendi told me and I was on my fourth drink.

And then some are medium sized but entirely unremarkable.

Like Bradward Boimler’s, for instance.

Loves classic rock. Dyes his hair purple. Stickler for rules. Needs to loosen up a bit. A lot. Probably needs to get laid. Definitely needs to get laid.

That’s it, that’s the entire file. Beckett doesn’t really concern herself with whatever’s going on with Boimler beyond the occasional ribbing or co-assignment. It’s not because she doesn’t like the dork. She would tentatively (but never to his face) call him her friend if cornered. And she enjoyed riling him up.

She updates the file about a year (almost two) into her acquaintance with him. FUCKING BACKSTABBING TRAITOR. (That’s it now, that's the entire file.) She doesn’t revisit it again, not for almost eight months, despite Tendi’s cheerful updates on how he’s doing--they’re still in constant contact, despite his ghosting Beckett--and Rutherford’s worried comments on his well-being.

“It’s not our job to babysit him,” she snapped one day. “Hell, it wasn’t our job when he was here. Just let it go.”

And that was the end of that.

______

Okay, that was very much not the end of that.

It starts like this:

“Something’s going on, on the Titan,” Tendi hisses, dropping down into Beckett’s bunk at like 2am. Time doesn’t work the same out here as it does on Beckett’s home planet, but it feels like 2am so she’s calling it 2am. Everyone who’d been on the Alpha shift were pretty much dead to the world anyway, so it might as well have been. The point was, Beckett was sleeping, Tendi should have been sleeping, but instead the two of them are having an anxious stare off in the dark.

And Beckett’s currently having cardiac arrest from being startled so soundly. After her heart starts working again like a human heart is supposed to, the words begin to register. Sort of. “What?”

Tendi flips her padd around. Beckett blinks at the bright light from the screen, squinting to see what’s there.

“Is that morse code? Why the fuck is the Titian using morse code.”

Tendi stares at her unblinkingly, face flat.

Then,

“Oh. Oh shit. Shit!” Beckett sits straight up, throwing the covers off. There’s a few protesting noises and shushes that ensue around the room, but Beckett is already making a blind grab for her pants and shoes. “The fuck didn’t you lead with that?”

“Because people are sleeping,” Tendi whispers. Loudly. She rolls off the bunk and onto the floor, shoes already on. “So we’re going, right?”

“Of course we’re fucking going,” Beckett hisses. “Why wouldn’t-”

“Because you’ve been all hung up over him for the past eight months.”

“He ghosted me!”

“Okay yeah-”

“After accepting a promotion that he promised he wouldn’t-”

“Mariner-”

“He’s a backstabbing, little weasel who climbs over his friends-”

“Is this about that or the fact that you miss him?”

Beckett finishes pulling her shoes on and stands up, scowling. “I don’t miss him. Why are you defending him?”

“I’m pissed too. Don’t get me wrong, when we see him I’m gonna kill him. But I think this is more than that.”

“Whatever.” Beckett turns on her heel. “Are we stealing a shuttle or what?”

“Rutherford’s already on it.” Tendi taps rapidly on her data padd, keeping pace with Beckett’s light job easily. “We were hoping you could like. Let your mom know-”

“Oh for fuck’s sake.” Beckett pulls out her comm, quickly typing out a quick message to her mother. “This is gonna be a shitshow.” The two of them enter the shuttle bay, which is pretty much deserted due to it being beta-shift.

“I have no idea how we’re even going to sneak onto the planet. It’s been on lockdown since the Titian crashed there.” Tendi’s shoulders slump.

“Leave it to me, I know a guy.”

“Of course you do,” Rutherford says, popping head out the shuttle door. “Good to go?”

Tendi gives him a thumbs up.

Beckett straps herself into a chair, stomach churning. “He’s fine though, right? Like, we would have gotten a call. Who’s his emergency contact anyway?”

Tendi worries her lip between her teeth. “His mom? I don’t know, it never came up and I don’t have access to his file.”

“He wasn’t on the list of deceased. Just the missing persons list,” Rutherford offers helpfully, punching in some coordinates.

“Well that’s reassuring,” Beckett mutters under her breath. She stares down at her comm, stomach churning.

_______

“Seriously, what are the odds of this even happening?” Tendi asks, dragging Rutherford by the arm behind them. A severely concussed, disgruntled Rutherford makes a grunt of what Beckett assumes is agreement.

“Do you really want to be arguing about the odds right now?” Boimler shrieks, sliding to an uncoordinated stop as the four of them run directly into the maze wall.

“Fuck,” Beckett says, eloquently.

“I thought you said you knew which way we were going!” Boimler runs a hand through his wet hair, face going through a series of complicated expressions before settling on frustration.

Beckett crosses her arms. “I did know where we were going. When I had the fucking map!”

“Why are you yelling at me about that? I didn’t even have it!”

“I don’t see anyone else here dumb enough to have lost it.”

“Guys-”

“You were the last person with the map, Mariner.”

“Unless some idiot took it out of my pack when I wasn’t looking.”

“Guys.”

“I didn’t touch your stupid map! Why are you so fixated on this!”

“Because if we had the map, maybe we wouldn’t be about to die via giant space spider!”

“Guys!” Rutherford shouts.

Beckett jumps at the unexpected shout from the usually quiet ensign. She turns on her heel, meeting Tendi and Rutherford’s unimpressed stares.

“Lookie, secret passage.” Rutherford waves a hand to a hole in the wall that hadn’t been there like two seconds ago. “You two good? Can we go?”

Beckett pushes past Boimler, lightly shoulder checking him and jumps through the doorway after her two annoyed friends. She doesn’t listen worriedly to see if Boimler follows her (she doesn’t) and she doesn’t resist the urge to turn around and make sure he’s close.

She balls her hands into tight fists and stomps past Tendi and Rutherford, ignoring the exchanged glances. “Please tell me this is a way out.” Her flat voice has the barest hint of a tremble in it.

You’re losing your touch, Mariner, get it together, she tells herself.

Tendi pulls a lighter out of her back pocket. (Because of course D’Vana Tendi has an old timey lighter on hand. There was a reason Beckett liked her after all.) It takes a couple of flicks, but she manages to get it to catch. The small source of light barely lights up their passageway, but it’s enough to see that it leads deeper into the planet.

“Well, here goes nothing,” Tendi sighs. “I’ll take the lead, I guess. You good, Sam?”

Rutherford grimaces, but nods. “Nothing I can’t handle. Let’s just get out of here.”

_______

It would be Beckett’s luck that she and Bomlier get separated from the other two. And it would just be their luck that there’s a cave in just before they reach the end of the catacombs. And of course, of fucking course, the Cerritos’ ETA on getting them out is anywhere from 2-6 hours, depending on how fast they can get the ship up and running again.

If anyone is using buffer time, Beckett is going to put spiders in their pillowcase.

“This is bullshit,” she mutters, dropping into a seated lotus position. She plays with Tendi’s lighter, flickering it on and off again.

Boimler grimaces from across her. “Can you stop that? It’s giving me a headache.”

Beckett makes steady eye contact again and flicks it off again.

“Fuck you.”

“Fuck yourself. Or whatever,” Beckett mutters. She flicks the lighter back on.

Boimler makes a face like he’s swallowing back a retort. Instead of snapping back, he jams his hands into his pockets. “Can we- can we just talk about it? Like actually talk about it, not passive aggressively pretend like-”

“Like passive aggressively avoiding your best friend’s calls is okay?” Lighter flicks off again. “Yeah, that seems like bitch move, for sure. Glad I don’t know anyone who does that.”

“I’m sorry,” Boimler says into the dark, voice cracking.

“Fuck you.” Beckett flicks the lighter back on. Boimler’s eyes follow it, eyes dilating slightly as the light hits them. She flicks it off again, plunging the cave into darkness again. She flicks it back on. Boimler leans heavily against the cave wall, not looking at her or the light. He starting to look very pale. Paler than usual.

Beckett wonders about that headache.

“How long were you out here before we got your distress signal?” she asks, keeping her eyes glued to the lighter. She sees him shrug in her peripheral.

“Dunno. A while.”

Her stomach tightens. “You didn’t like. See anything weird?”

“You mean besides you and Tendi hauling ass? Not really.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Why?”

“What about strange smells-”

“Mariner.”

“You look pale,” she snaps. “And like super clammy. And I’m not talking about your stressed out will Mariner stop talking clammy, I’m talking like I think you inhaled a deadly neurotoxin kind of clammy.”

“I feel fine! Just the headache. Aaand maybe a slight stomach ache,” he adds at her flat expression. “I always have a stomach ache though-”

“-yeah, yeah, it’s the ulcer you’ve had since you were, like, two, you’re a goddamn medical marvel Boims. Budge over.” She shoves the lighter into his hands and grabs his face. “Are you dizzy,” she asks, peering in closely at his pupils.

Boimler tries to shove her away, but she’s stronger and more stubborn. “A little. Look, it’s just the headache and str-”

“Yeah, do you usually get pink eye from stress?” she asks dryly, pulling back to giving him some breathing room.

“I-what.”

“Your white are like. Super inflamed or whatever. Boimler, I think something’s wrong.”

“Shit.” He rubs his temples. “What’s that ETA again?”

“Six hours. Give or take some buffer time.” Mariner stands up. She’s not worried, she’s not. “Maybe you should lie down.”

Boimler glowers at her in the dim light, hands tightly wrapped around her lighter. “I’m fine.”

______

“Good thing you pulled him out when you did,” Dr T’Ana tells Ransom. “Any longer-” she pauses, seeing Beckett’s expression. “Do you want to know what it was?” she asks her.

Beckett, who’s currently white knuckling the back of the plastic chair by the biobed, shakes her head. “Not really,” she replies, stiffly. “Long-term effects?”

“None,” T’Ana replies, scratchy voice almost gentle. Almost. “So feel free to be as hard on him as you want when he wakes up.”

Ransom barks a laugh, clapping Beckett’s shoulder. “Oh, Mariner knows how to be-”

“If you make a single hard joke in my presence, I’m tossing you back onto that planet,” Beckett replies flatly.

Ransom removes his hand. “Right! Right, I’ll just be on my-”

“Out,” T’Ana and Beckett snap.

There’s a pause after the turbolift doors close after Ransom. Dr. T’Ana eyes Beckett warily for a moment. Then, “Call me if he wakes up with any symptoms.”

“You said-”

“Yeah, well. He has a lot of surprises in him, doesn’t he?” She gives Beckett a pointed look before leaving, grumbling down at her clipboard.

Beckett glares down at the unconscious Boimler. “The shit I go through for your dumb ass.” She flops into the uncomfortable chair. “Wake up already. It’s no fun yelling at you like this.”

____

Surprisingly, Beckett does not yell at Boimler when he wakes up. It’s a near thing, though.

“Well, thanks for not letting me die, I guess,” he says, watching her warily after she’s done ranting. Not yelling, ranting.

“I wouldn’t have let you die,” she scoffs. “You’re still my friend, dumbass.”

Boimler perks up in surprise. “What?”

“Look, just because you pulled the ultimate shitty move, doesn’t stop us from being friends. You’re still on notice, though.”

“Right! Right.” He pauses, blinking up at her. “Does it help that I submitted a transfer back to the Cerritos before any of this went down?”

Beckett freezes. “Wait, what?”

“Yeah. I mean, don’t get me wrong that was my actual dream job, buuuut-”

“Riker is crazy?” Beckett dryly supplies.

“I thought you were crazy,” Boimler lets out a whooshing breath. “Like I seriously thought you were the most batshit, insane person I’d ever met, hands down. But Riker is certifiable.”

Beckett grins. She can’t suppress it and she’s too tired to try. “So you’re saying I’m preferable.”

“I will take you any day of the week over that.”

“Sounds like a compliment.”

“It is.”

“Hmm.” She eyes him critically.

“Soooo,” he draws out the word. “Am I forgiven?”

Beckett picks his shirt up off the end of the biobed and throws it at his face. “Maybe.”

“Maybe?” He pulls it over his head, causing his hair to stick up in the back. Beckett suppresses the urge to smooth it down.

“I like watching you squirm,” she replies. “It soothes my massively inflated ego.”

Boimler barks out a laugh, easing himself out of the biobed carefully. Beckett turns to go--he still has to talk with Dr. T’Ana and possibly her mom over the transfer, and give his full report to Riker--but stops as he catches her wrist in one hand.

“Hey. Thanks.”

Beckett’s heartbeat rackets up a few notches. Stop that, she thinks at it and then stops because thinking at your own organs is weird. “Don’t worry about it,” she says, voice even. “You would have done the same for me.”

It’s true. Boimler may be a bit of a bastard and sometimes a shitty friend, but she has no doubt he’d have come running if it’d been the Cerritos accosted.

“Yeah,” he replies. “Sometimes I feel like that’s all I do with you.”

“What?”

He drops his gentle grip on her wrist. “Nothing. Just.” He shrugs, looking cagey. “I know I’ve been a bit of a-”

“Bitch?”

“--yeah, that lately. But. There’s not much I wouldn’t do for you. And that’s why I’m coming back. Because-because you deserve to know that. That you're my best friend, too.”

Her face heats up. “Yeah, well,” she mumbles. “Whatever.” Jams her hands into her pockets. “Don’t think I’m just gonna forget everything because you-”

“Yeah, I know. It’s fine.” He gives her a lopsided smile. “I just thought you should know.”

____

Beckett can feel the blush on her cheekbones until she reaches her bunk. Fuck, she thinks. Fuuuuuck.

She opens up her mental file on Boimler, crossing out whatever she had in there before. Best friend, she replaces it with. Stares at it for a long moment. Erases it. Puts it back.

Bradward “Brad” Boimler. Best friend. Loves classic rock. Dyes his hair purple. Has made some improvements, but still needs to loosen up a bit. Probably needs to get laid. Definitely needs to get laid.

You could help with that.

Best friend. She underlines in the file. You don’t have feelings like that for your friends.

Beckett throws herself into her bunk. She had the horrible, sneaking suspicion that Brad Boimler’s file was about to get a lot longer.

_______

#beckett mariner #brad boimler #marinler #boimler x mariner #d'vana tendi #sam rutherford #star trek lower decks #star trek lower decks fic #star trek lower decks fanfic

[sukirichi]

— 💌 ; a love letter from @kyriaan

long post below regarding broken records. cw includes adultery, physical assault, toxic relationships, broken records spoilers, and mature content

[ from the ask ] BROKEN RECORDS ; track 005

Okay! I finally had time to actually sit down and properly read chap 5 cause ill be damned and burned if i dont pay special attention to one of my favorite series here! Rather drown or be sting by bees slowly 😒

🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙃 I for the first time don't even know where to start so allow me to be all over the place cause my emotions are also all over the place with this chapter ✌️

Ill start by y/n's dad caN GO FUCK HIMSELF? Like okay sir you might have fallen in love with our mom (ill give him the benefit of the doubt regarding his feelings) BUT SIR YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN HONEST? FROM THE BEGINNING? ALSO BRUH YOU KIDDING ME??? SIR YOU LEGIT ABANDONED YOUR OTHER DAUGHTER AND THEN YOU PROCESS TO 'LEAVE US' I- YOOOOO I WOULD BITCH SLAP HIM I SWEAR!!

Also ALSO ILL SCREAM FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK NO KID HAS EVER TO BE BLAMED FOR BEING BORN!! Y/n mom's line: 'we have to atone for our sins' its legit BULLSHIT it wad NOT y/n fault her DAD COULDNT KEEP HIS DICK INSIDE HIS PANTS NOR ITS Y/N FAULT THAT HER DAD CHEATED!!! ATONE FOR OUR SINS MY ASS!! the father is the one that has to take responsibility for all this shitty situation we do NOT nor any kid out there in this situation has to be taken accountable by this!!

And now Suna 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 bruh im just gonna cry... Everything he does just makes me heart swell i feel so cozy when i read his parts like how sweet and present he is I- bruh I never had that... Actually seeing y/n breaking up with him when shes clearly falling in love with him just breaks me cause Girl for real Suna would be there for you... I get it shes afraid and shes acting on that fear but girl... Pls he truly loves you deeply not everyone is like your dad. There are happy endings. There are good people Sunas one of them pls 🥺🥺🥺 also MY LOVE TSUMU BEING A SUPPORTIVE FRIEND EVEN THO SUNA GOT THE GIRL BRUH TSUMU I FUCKING LOVE YOU MY CHILDISH YET ADORABLY SMUG BOY 😭😭😭😭😭

Nagisas a bitch btw ✌️ so far i see no redemption not excuse in what she did so far. I get her reasons but that does NOT excuse her behavior. She has to lash out at her cunt of a dad not at a innocent woman who was also a victim all along. Nor even her half sister. I get her mentality behind this but doesnt excuse her behavior at all- its basically the same as being a victim from a bully and playing bully after aswell.

Overall YOU MADE ME CRY AGAIN SUKI! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS BUT ALSO UGH MY HEART SUKI!

[ from suki ] 

BROKEN RECORDS IS UR FAVE SERIES??? babe pls you’re gonna me cry !! nah nah fr his dishonesty caused all this mess. YEAHA SAKLAA tbh I love mama lucy but her words of ‘atoning for their sins’ or her mindset of ‘we don’t deserve to be happy when we’ve hurt others’ really messed up YN. she was only 21 and vulnerable with all the shambles happening in her family + the sudden assault from nagisa, that when her mother said those words, she struggled to let go of it. to her, it became like a final verdict that dictated how she lived her life.

SUNA URGHHH PLEASE GIVE SUNA A CHANCE HE HAS PURE AND GOOD INTENTIONS BUT I CANT BLAME HER EITHER AHSJAKA. and the comparison of nagisa being a bully’s victim only to become the next bully is true. nagisa should lash out at their shitty excuse of a father. ALSO AAAAHH THE NEXT CHAPTER (007) IS WORSE AHSJKAAL

[ from the ask ] BROKEN RECORDS ; track 005

I know shins attractive I mean mans perfect?? Does he even have any flaw?? And the way he cried when he got his jersey MYGOD FHDHFHFJSKS but I still look at him and im like.... Hmmmm nah i wouldnt date him its just not my... Do i dare say type? Cause i dont think i have a type ghfhfisofbd but like I just 🧍‍♀️

I love him i just dont love him i guess

The makeout scene tho ill give you that 🥵🥵🥵 made me bark (i would still walk out next day like was a good fuck kita byeeee🚉🏃‍♀️💨)

... More drama regarding mari... And you said this will have like 10 chapters... And from 8 on will be angsty.... 🙂 *traumatized noises*

[ from suki ] 

YUUHHH KITA IS PERFECT HERE AHSJKAA IDK MAYBE ITS MY SIMPING FOR NAOYA CONVERTED TO KITA ALREADY BEING PERFECT AS HE ALREADY IS AND I AMPED IT UP BCOS THE SIMP MODE IS ACTIVATED AHSKAA. the make out scene !! pls sir i’m on my knees spare some love in ur heart AAAAAAHHHHHH. also. i assure you. businessman! kita got game. he’s gonna make you walk funny if you give him the chance HSJKA

yeah i just finished writing the outline for track7 right now and the drama is HSJKAA it gave me a headache sobs 

[ from the ask ] BROKEN RECORDS ; track 006

I want to give you my usual thoughts on the new chapter and at the same ahm...

I just saw myself on Suna... Deeply....and it kinda slapped me harder than i was expecting...there were too many things from him giving himself to mari/treating her like he wants to be treated... To deleting his best friend from social media thanks to his girlfriend... And it really hurt me ahah..

I would vent but.. Yeah

But yes this chapter i saw myself in suna and i had to take quite the long breaks cause it was getting to me 😅😅😅 also if anything i learned from my experiences is that MARI SCREAMS RED FLAGS and even Osamu can see that pls

I would honestly end Mari there, i wouldnt even bother to just retort i would walk my way into to the damn apartment and fucking take Suna for myself cause Mari does not deserve him. Shes manipulative, and in a way abusive.. Not allowing him to keep contact with his best friend his a total redflag and o know its because Suna had feelings for y/n and vice versa but Suna never gave het a reason to distrust him.

The moment he said he was best friends with y/n and was single she immediately clinged himself to him and for what? To then dump him like he was trash...

He gave himself to her, he proved he was there for her he even took her back this boy deserves the fucking world and its not Mari...

I kinda want to say it's not y/n at this point either cause the way she broke his heart was kinda the same Mari did.. Y/n disregarded his feelings and just broke it up.. Mari disregarded his feelings abd broke it up... But y/n stated from the very beginning that she would eventually break up Mari just shrugged and didn't care so i can in a way forgive y/n i cant forgive mari

Besides y/n was supportive from the beginning while Mari was obsessive and controlling.

Another really insanely well written chapter as usual (albeit this one making me ball my eyes off harder because yeah) but yes~ eagerly waiting for the next one~

Take your time tho 😌🙌

Mari can go fuck off 💗💓💞💕❣️❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍💯💝💖💋💅

Suna x y/n pls

Y/n deserves to have a healthy love life with someone she loves (hence why npt Kita) and loves her back

And Suna deserve the fucking world and be treated right

[ from suki ] 

NAHHHH cuz when you said suna was treating mari the way he wanted YN to treat her... that’s right. on point. they’re all so complicated sobs. MARI IS A WALKING RED FLAG THAT OSAMU CAN SMELL FROM A MILE AWAY. ALSO yes mari is manipulative and borderline possessive when it came to suna. like yeah, let’s be real, she could tell a long time ago that suna was in love with YN and it made her insecure / jealous, but the whole time, YN kept her distance. she was supportive over their relationship from afar as to make mari comfortable. suna also did everything he could to make sure she was well cared for. for three years, he was focused on her and only her. he gave love a second chance despite being brokenhearted. suna never mari a chance to doubt because he, too, was sure he could be happy with her.

until mari left him.

and now suna is back with YN because they will always have each other. but honestly,,,if we think about it, if mari never broke up with suna or at least gave him the chance to explain himself - if mari didn’t do the exact thing YN did to suna years ago - he honestly would’ve been really happy with mari. they were going well. like yeah mari has always been toxic by pushing suna’s boundaries and asking him to unfollow his own best friend on social media, but he did it anyway. because he trusted their relationship. he wanted the best for them. 

also yeah, the parallels between mari and YN were intentional !! 

HEHEHEHE THE KITA X YN SHIP everyone loves them im so happy about that bcos kita is so amazing in my eyes. PREACH FOR THAT THO !! SUNA DESERVES THE BEST. SUNA DESERVES TO BE TREATED RIGHT. HE DESERVES THE WORLD AND SO MUCH MORE

thank you for taking the time to send me this, kya, it means a lot to me and it motivates me to work harder on the future chapters !! <33

#asks with naoya's trophy wife #besties #series ( broken records ) #tw: physical assault #tw: toxic #tw: toxic relationships #tw: adultery

[heloisedaphnebrightmore]

Useless warning pt. 1|2 [Sirius Black x Reader] - Challenge

Title: Useless warning pt. 1 ➔ Useless warning pt. 2, Here! Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader Word count: 3.9k Published: 29 July, 2020 Warnings: Angst Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore Notes: I wrote this for Amelia's Writing Challenge [ @hufflefluff-writer​ ], where I had to use the the below prompt, however I kind of ran away with the storyline and instead of a one shot it became a multiple part story. I think my mind just went rogue with this one, don't judge me :D - I would also like to state thatt I have nothing against Marlene. I just needed her to be in a negative spotlight for the story.

"I told you not to fall in love with me!"

I also added the song that inspired my mood at the end of the fic

Summary: Sirius is one of your best friends who happens to be dating Marlene. She isn’t particularly a good friend of yours, but you do get along. She agrees to go out with Sirius, all the while she is aware of your feelings. Things get complicated as you are unable to keep your feelings to yourself anymore.

Challenge: [x] [x]

Harry Potter Characters Masterlist | Masterlists

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You were sitting in the Gryffindor common room, resting your head on Remus' shoulder. Deep sighs left your lungs every few seconds, gazing at Sirius trying to steal a kiss from Marlene. It was hard to watch him giving his undivided attention to someone else.

You have been in love with him for a year or so. It was inevitable. Even when you became friends, years ago, you already thought he was handsome, but the years just helped him to look even more attractive. He has jokingly warned you in the past numerous times not to ever fall in love with him. He knew the kind of person he was. He changed girls more often than he changed his cloths. You tried to obey his request, but years of being his best friend, getting to know him more than he knew himself, turned your feelings around.

You sighed once again as you watched him placing his palm behind Marlene's neck, pulling her into a passionate kiss. That strong grip around your aching heart has become a daily occurring. As scary as it was, you kind of adapted to the pain their pair caused you. Even though Sirius was a player, his relationship with Marlene has been ongoing for the past three months, confirming what you have been afraid of the most. You knew he wasn't far from falling for Marlene. She was stunning with a good brain and funny comments. She was undeniably one of the most popular girls of Hogwarts, making you feel utterly defeated.

You exhaled deeply at the thought of watching them for the next year before you finally left Hogwarts. You wanted nothing more than to leave them and jump into whatever your future brought to you.

"Are you okay?" Remus whispered above you.

"Yeah..." You replied weakly.

"You have been sighing an unusual amount of times." He said and you knew very well that you looked like a love-sick puppy.

"I only have to survive a year." You turned your head upwards to be able to look at his face. His eyes were attached to the couple, just like yours a second ago. His hair was a mess, his expression unhappy. "Why do you look so troubled?" You asked.

"Because it's hard to watch you suffer." He pulled a pained half-smile, making you chuckle.

"Come on now, Remus. I am fine. I honestly got used to it already." Your voice was soft and reassuring.

"Used to what?" He asked, his brows furrowed.

"The pain in my chest." You confirmed. "I have felt it for so long now, it's kind of like a part of me." You giggled even though it was nowhere near happy. He finally turned to you, managing to look into your eyes in a rather weird angle.

"That shouldn't be something you have to get used to." He shook his head.

"I know, Remus, but unfortunately that is exactly how unrequited love works." You shrugged nonchalantly.

"She knew." Remus said and you knew what he meant without questioning him.

"Yes, she did, but it doesn't mean she should have said no. Remus, look, Sirius likes Marlene, Marlene likes Sirius. Just because she knew of my feelings, you can't expect them not to get involved with each other. You are only thinking that way because you are my friend." You explained, once again heaving a deep sigh. The powerful hold around your chest reappeared and you welcomed it as an old friend.

"I would never date someone my friend likes." He huffed, annoyance clear in his voice.

"I have never really been friends with her. We just got along when we needed to." You said.

"Still, it's making me uncomfortable." He said as he shrugged and you lifted your head from his shoulder.

"Remus, don't worry so much. You are more worked up about it than I am." You chuckled at his protective behaviour. He just shook his head, knowing that you were simply pretending to be strong, but deep down you were hurting more than you showed. It was always like that. Hiding your feelings were something that you learned through out the years to protect yourself.

"What's so funny over there." Sirius joined the conversation, hearing your giggling. Your eyes met his captivating grey orbs, for a second leaving you breathless, before you found your voice.

"You don't have to know everything, Sirius." You spoke with a small smile, turning back to Remus who was shaking his head with the same expression.

"You are unbelievable." Remus said, suddenly standing up, pulling you with him and dragging you out of the common room. You could feel Sirius' curious gaze on your back, but you didn't turn your head to look at him. You were more interested in what Remus was planning.

"Where are we going?" You asked, whilst he was pulling you after himself.

"I got fed up of the act, that you have put up. Do you think I can not see that your smile is nowhere near genuine? I rather drag you out and get suspicious looks, than keep watching you suffer." He was quite agitated to your surprise.

"Look Remus, I am fine." You tried to reassure him.

"No, you are not. Enough of acting though. You know what you need? You need to tell him that you love him." He halted abruptly on an empty corridor and turned around, folding his arms in front of his chest.

"What?" You asked as if you have heard him wrong, brows running high, mouth agape. You certainly believed that your hearing has become impaired.

"Tell him you love him." He said firmly, confirming his seriousness.

"That will never happen." You smiled awkwardly as if you were trying to tell him that he was insane.

"Look, I know it sounds like a strange, rather weird idea, but the only way you will get over him is if you confess to him. He will reject you and you can have closure." He attempted to explain his reasoning and he was indeed successful. He made the little gears work harder in your brain then ever.

"I mean... but what if our friendship will be ruined?" You tried to argue his point, not because he wasn't right, but because you were terrified of rejection. Sirius wasn't just a friend or a crush, he was more to you than anyone else, making your situation ever so complicated.

"Then it will be ruined." He shrugged, making you frown at his nonchalant reply. "You can't stay by his side, while he drools over other women. I can't watch you putting up a fake smile and pretend that everything is just fine, when deep down you are trying to hide an excruciating heartache." You heaved a deep sigh as he finished his monologue, knowing how right he was.

"Fine, I will do it tomorrow." You said, your voice beyond broken. You never wanted to lose Sirius, but at this point you knew that you would have to face the consequences of your feelings. As much as you wanted to deny it, Remus knew you way too well, to understand how hard you tried to pretend to be fine in all circumstances and it wasn't healthy.  

"Good. Right after classes I will call him to the Wooden bridge." He stated and you nodded in confirmation. He walked up to you and placed his hand on your shoulder, gently squeezing it. "Don't be down. Think of it as an end to something painful and a new beginning to something beautiful." You chuckled at his wise words, but nodded in anticipation.

"You always know what to say." You smiled as you started walking back to the common room. "By the way where were we headed?" You asked curiously.

"Nowhere, I just wanted to get you out of there." He shrugged with an awkward smile.

"Well, it worked." You shook your head at his unusual behaviour, but your smile never faltered.

Upon returning to the common room, Sirius questioned you about your whereabouts, but you just exchanged a quick smile with Remus and shook your head, leaving him in suspense.

Your night was long and hard, nervousness quickly taking over you as Remus left you alone. You have been thinking of all the ways you wanted to tell Sirius about your feelings, but deep down you knew, that you would not remember any of your thoughts by the next day.

After hours of rolling around and endless sighing, you finally gave up on torturing yourself and let sleep overcome you.

The next morning you jumped out of your bed and before you knew it, you were sitting in the Great Hall, right next to Remus. Soon Sirius arrived with Marlene on his arm, leaning over you to give you a kiss on the top of your head, just like every morning.

"Morning, guys." He said, taking a seat beside you, Marlene on his other side. He received a couple of replies, but not one from you. You looked at Remus, who gave you an annoyed eye roll, before turning back to his breakfast. You had to acknowledge that he has been hanging out with the boys way too much. Beside his kind personality, he definitely picked up some of those typical marauders attributes, which mostly consisted of sarcastic replies, eye rolls and annoyed scoffs.

You chuckled at his manners, before turning back to your food. He knew how badly Sirius' attentive behaviour affected you, even with that small smile plastered across your face. Remus just always knew what you thought and it definitely brought you closer.

By the end of classes, you were standing at the Wooden bridge, arms resting on the edge of the handrail, whilst watching the view and waiting for Remus to send Sirius over. Your thoughts were a mess of what ifs and hows, but you didn't have much time to think as you saw Sirius' form appear at the end of the bridge.

He walked up to you, his back leaning against the side of the bridge with a questioning look.

"You know, this is suspicious right?" He asked and you raised a brow at him. "Instead of you coming to me and asking me to meet you here, you send Remus to do it." He clarified his words.

"Yeah..." You replied hesitantly, not wanting to tell him that it was all Remus' idea.

"So what's up? Why did you want to talk to me?" He asked impatiently, which made you furrow your brows.

"Someone is in a rush." You replied with a scoff.

"I have promised a date to Marlene." He shrugged.

"So you simply don't have time for your friend." You raised a brow questioningly. "Next time I will just book an appointment." You spoke, clearly annoyed.

"Don't be cute. You know that's not what I meant." He attempted to save the situation.

"But you did though. I wanted to talk to you about something that's very important to me, but what do I get? You, trying to rush me to get it over with, because you have a date." You hissed in anger.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think of it this way." He sighed, whilst trying to get an eye contact from you, unsuccessfully.

"Whatever." You shook your head in a reply. A few seconds of silence fell up on you, before he spoke again.

"What bothers you?" He asked as he turned around, joining you in gazing over the rift under the bridge.

"It's very complicated. I don't really know how to talk about it." You started, making him frown.

"Is something wrong?" He asked.

"It's not... I mean..." You heaved a deep sigh at being unable to create a coherent sentence. "My head is a mess of thoughts." You scoffed, trying to organise what you really wanted to say.

"What is it? You know you can tell me anything." He tried to encourage you to talk. You finally looked up at him, his grey eyes curious as to what you wanted to say.

"Anything?" You questioned.

"Anything!" He repeated firmly.

"I don't think you will want to hear this, but I still have to say it though." You turned away from him, not wanting to see his disgusted expression. The knot in your stomach and the grip around your chest became stronger, your throat dried out as your anxiety heightened.

"There isn't a thing you can't share with me." He spoke with his lips curved up into a gentle smile.

"I love you." You blurted it out, deciding that it's better to just get it over with.

"I love you too." He replied, making you scoff, before a pained smile appeared on your face.

"No, you don't get it." You shook year head. You lifted your face, looking up into his grey eyes, which seemed to be more confused than you have ever seen them." I love you the way you like Marlene." You clarified your feelings for him, watching as his eyes grew wider by the second.

"What?" His voice was weak and shocked at the same time. His demeanour less confident than ever.

"You heard it." You spoke firmly, your nervousness long out of your system. You knew his answer,  you knew him. There were no questions left. You simply waited for him to process what you have just told him.

"But... I told you not to fall in love with me!" He replied, his words weaker than you have ever heard.

"Feelings are not something people can control. Believe me, if it depended on me, I would have never fallen for you." You replied.

"You never showed it, though." He spoke, surprising you with his words.

"I mean, we were friends and I knew you would never look at me that way." You explained looking straight into those grey irises. Your voice sounded calm and collected, your demeanour firm and though.

"I'm not sure what you want me to say." He spoke hesitantly.

"I want you to reject me." You said confidently, causing his brows to run high.

"What?" He asked in shock.

"The only way I can get closure is if you reject me." You explained with a shrug. He looked ever so confused at your behaviour.

"You are taking this quite well." He spoke with a frown and you knew exactly what he meant. Of course, you did. You became so good at pretending to be fine, that it was almost natural not to show your real feelings around others.

"I guess, I do." You spoke in a relaxed tone.

"Erm... I'm... I don't know what to say. You know, I am with Marlene." He shook his head slightly, trying to find the right words. "I just can't do this." He said, his voice defeated.

"That's fine." You replied, making him frown.

"You are scaring me, you know?" He spoke, his eyes looking for something in yours, that you knew he would never find. You could feel your tears collecting in your eyes, but you didn't let them leave. Not just yet. "You are acting strange." He shook his head lightly.

"No, I am not. I came here to tell you that I loved you and I knew before I even decided to confess, that I would be rejected. I was simply prepared for it." You explained halfheartedly.

"Okay..." He replied hesitantly. "I have to go now, but I will talk to you later." His tone was soft and gentle as if he was scared of hurting you, even though you have stood there in your toughest form.

"Yeah..." You replied simply, assuming he has only said that to make you feel better. "See you." You told him as he was still standing there. You wished he was gone by now so you could just let all your feelings go, but his hesitant steps and slowly disappearing back, forced you to keep everything in, until finally he was out of sight.

You slid down the side of the bridge, letting your tears finally roll down your cheeks. Of course, you were hurting, your chest didn't even let the air in anymore. You felt like you were being suffocated. You were heaving for breathe as you felt your salty tears pour through your lips.

It was killing you to know that Sirius never even thought of you romantically. It hurt you to see him giving attention to all the other girls. It pained you to see him kiss Marlene so lovingly. But most of all, it teared you apart from the inside to know that he would never return your feelings.

You sat at the bottom of the bridge, legs pulled up to your chest, face hidden between your knees, tears escaping your bloodshot eyes. You just wanted to disappear from the castle, from the country, from the whole wide world.

You didn't even realise a presence beside you, only when a hand lifted your head and two soft lips attacked your own. Your eyes widened in surprise at the sight of the owner of the long black locks, but before you knew it, your eyelids flattered shut and you gave into the blissful feeling of his lips moving in synch with yours.

It was better than you ever dared to imagine. His lips were in perfect harmony with yours, making you moan into the kiss. You could feel the salty taste of your tears on your lips as he placed a hand behind your neck, pulling you even closer. He was captivating, he was giving you hope and you were cursing him for it. You didn't want your feelings to be played with.

He finally pulled away, leaning against your forehead, breathing heavily, along with you. You didn't even realise when your tears stopped streaming down your cheeks.

"You are not as strong as you pretend to be." He spoke with a pained expression, opening his grey orbs to look at you.

"Sirius..?" You questioned... everything. You didn't understand why he was there, why he kissed you, why he came back. Your head was a mess of confused thoughts.

"Why did you have to tell me how you feel?" He heaved a deep sigh, his breath shaky, feeling defeated. He pulled away from you and sat down beside you, leaning his back against the side of the bridge.

"I told you. To get closure." You replied hesitantly. You were nowhere near the expected closure. Your feelings were now more unbearable than ever.

"Closure for what? You just had to come and stir things up, didn't you?" He asked, massaging the bridge of his nose.

"Stir what up?" You asked furrowing at his unclear words.

"I was over you finally. Or at least I thought I was and then you decide to confess to me? How am I supposed to take that?" He raised his voice, hiding his face in his palm.

"Over... me?" You questioned hesitantly.

"Yes, I loved you." He lifted his head to look into your eyes. "I thought you would always look at me as a mere brother figure and I accepted it. That's why I always jokingly told you not to ever fall for me. But here you are now, telling me that you love me and I am not supposed to feel good about it, I am not. But I just can't deny that a part of me wants to jump out of my skin in happiness." He confessed, leaving you with parted lips and a shocked expression across your face.

"I... I didn't expect that." You spoke in confusion.

"Believe me, I didn't expect your confession either." He replied with a scoff.

"But... what do you feel then?" You asked, trying not to get your hopes any higher than they already were.

"I honestly don't know." He shook his head, letting out a deep sigh he has been holding onto. "A part of me is happy that you love me, but I'm not sure about what I feel and I don't know what to do with Marlene now." His voice was beyond defeated and you just wanted to pull him into a hug, to tell him that everything will be just fine, but you stopped yourself. You knew that it wouldn't help him now. It would just confuse him.

"You have to decide what you want. I can't help you with that." You spoke, trying to keep yourself composed.

"I know. I just need a bit of time." He said and you nodded in agreement. A few minutes of silence fell up on you, before he stood up and reached out for you to help you up. You accepted his hand and steadied yourself, but before you could have even looked up, he pulled you into his embrace, dipping his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent. You protectively wrapped your arms around his torso, enjoying his warmness around you. You wished you could enjoy his hugs longer, but you knew that it wasn't fair to any of you, including Marlene.

"As much as I enjoy hugging you, this is not going to help you." You spoke as you pulled away from him with a soft smile across your face.

"I know." He took a deep breath.

"Let's go back." You said, but he stood still, not even attempting to move, his adoring eyes fixed on your face. You shook your head, rolled your eyes and started gently nudging him towards the castle, chuckling.

"You know, I can walk on my own." He smirked at your forceful behaviour.

"Yeah, but you didn't move though." You argued playfully.

"A simple please would have worked just fine." He replied.

"As if I was ever begging for anything." You scoffed.

"I can think of one or two reasons." He raised an eyebrow, before your deadly expression forced a loud chuckle to leave his lungs.

"Just shut up. That I would beg for." You rolled your eyes at his childish behaviour.

You went back to the castle, parting ways at the entrance as Marlene appeared. She questioned his whereabouts, but you quickly got involved by telling her that you needed to talk to Sirius and you didn't realise the time. She seemed to believe you, although a sceptical look rushed across her face, before it quickly disappeared.

Tags: @haphazardhufflepuff , @inkhearthes

Notes: If you enjoyed it, don't forget to like and/or reblog the chapter. Thank you :)

I’ll just put this here, because this song had a big impact on my mood when writing.

Notes: If you enjoyed it, don’t forget to like, comment and/or reblog the chapter. Thank you :)

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[taylorinthetardis]

Wallflowers - A Henry Cavill x Reader fic

So I did a thing! Rather than continue to work on my larger, more complicated Pride and Prejudice fic, I decided to make a fanfic out of the fantasy I had at work the other day!

There will most likely be a part two to this, I just thought I was at a good stopping point and wanted to see what you guys thought about it.

Full disclosure: I didn’t mean for this to whole ass turn into a Bath and Body Works ad, but it kinda did. For those of you reading in countries that do not have Bath and Body Works, its basically just a body and home care store. In the US their scents are legendary. Pretty much every young girl went through a BBW phase where that was all they used for soap and perfume. That all being said, in the interest of further disclosure and covering my ass, I own neither Bath and Body Works nor any of the trademarks on the scents listed herein. I also do not own Henry Cavill because owning human beings is a crime.

This is my first Henry fic so be gentle with me! It’s a bit longer than I had anticipated and un-beta’d.

Warnings: just a lot of fluff. some self-deprecation. loads of swearing. don’t know if I should warn for slight bashing of the religious but I will anyway so no one gets mad at me.

Wallflowers

It was shaping up to be another boring ass day at Bath and Body Works. I had started working here during the Pandemic after I was laid off from my job at the movie theatre. I had planned on it only being temporary, but even after things got better and I got my theatre job back, I decided to stick around. What can I say; a bitch is broke. Nothing wrong with double-dipping.

There was something about Sunday mornings in the mall. Probably because people around here still went to church in the mornings. Like it matters. Sunday mornings are always so slow, here and at the theatre, but the day always picks up after 1, when morning church services finish. It was me and Samantha up in the front room this morning, working out the leftover boxes from yesterday’s shipment. She was one of the first people I really bonded with here, both of us being super into both Marvel and DC, specifically Sebastian Stan and Henry Cavill. They had just started filming the next Superman movie and they were going to be shooting scenes up in Michigan again, like they had for Dawn of Justice.

“I’m just saying, we should really consider asking for a few days off and just going up there and scoping it out. I mean, it’s Henry fucking Cavill. He’s less than an hour away from us. Right now. Less than an hour. When is that ever gonna happen again? I can use some of my vacation time at the theatre, so at least I’m not missing out on money from them. It’ll be a blast. I mean, what’s the worst that can happen? We don’t see him? I mean at least we’d have tried. I’d rather try than stay down in stupid Ohio with the knowledge that he’s that close.”

“Do you really think Ann’s going to give us time off to stalk Superman?”

“We ain’t gonna tell her what it’s for! Just lie, c’mon now.” I laughed. I dropped a box of Gingham body cream into the understock drawer and broke the box down. Out of the corner of my eye I caught movement, oh goodie, a customer. Samantha was quicker to greet them.

“Welcome to Bath and Body… OH MY GOD!” I turned around and was met with the sight of none other than Henry fucking Cavill, sheepishly running his hand through his now jet-black curls, obviously embarrassed at having been recognized. Damn, am I glad I put make-up on this morning. Alright Y/N, this is your fucking chance. For once in your damn life, be fucking cool. You can do this. You look good, you smell like Champagne Toast, you’ve got this. I pulled my hair down from its messy bun and shook it out a bit before walking over to where Samantha was still trying to collect herself. The store radio started playing Halsey’s Bad at Love and I had to bite my lip to stop myself from bursting out laughing at the absurdity of the situation we were now in. Not five minutes ago we were talking about seeking him out and now here he was in all his brick-shithouse-ness. I looped my arm through Samantha’s in a show of support.

“What a wonderful coincidence! We were just talking about you and now here you are! It’s crazy how the universe works, isn’t it? I’m Y/N, this is Samantha; what can we help you with today, Henry?” I smiled my most adorable smile at him, the one that makes my little cheek dimple pop out, and, honestly, they both looked shocked. Samantha was clearly surprised that I was more capable of speech than she was, and to be honest so was I, and Henry seemed shocked that I would openly admit that we had been talking about him before he got there, which probably wasn’t a great thing to say, but I panicked.  

“Well, I was told this was the best place to go for candles and air freshener-y type things. The house I’m renting just has this odd odour that I can’t get rid of. I’ve been airing it out during the day, all the windows open, and I come home and it still smells funky. I know I could just find a different place, but it’s close to a park and that’s been nice for Kal and I don’t want to make a fuss, so…” Henry sort of shrugged, the buttons on his plaid shirt straining with the movement of his broad shoulders, and gestured around the store as if to say “that’s why I’m here”.

“Well, you’ve definitely come to the right place. All of our home care is in the second room, grab a basket, I’m sure we can find you some scents you’ll like.” He walked over to the basket tower to grab one as a couple more customers walked in. Samantha nudged me towards the second room; I was going to have to handle Henry alone for now, it seemed. He followed me over to the Wallflower wall. “So, these are our Wallflowers. They’re sort of like the Glade Plug-ins, I don’t know if you’ve seen those, you plug this diffuser into any power outlet and screw the fragrance bulb in and it diffuses the scented oil into the room. They last for about a month or so. These’ll probably be the best option for you, well these and maybe a room spray or two to start with. The candles are good, but obviously the scent is gonna be strongest when they’re burning and it’s probably not a great idea to light a bunch of candles and then leave for the whole day.”

He chuckled. “No, I’d say you’re right about that. I definitely don’t want to burn the place to the ground. Are there any scents that you’d recommend?”

“Well, I mean, it obviously all depends on your personal preferences. I like sweet scents. I like my space to be smelling like a bakery or a candy shop at all times, so I tend to go for anything like that. We actually still have some of our holiday scents that we’re trying to get rid of and there’s this really great one in that line called Spiced Apple Toddy. It smells like apple pie. I love it. It’s only out during fall and winter so I stocked up. I need it all year long, honestly. I still have so many other scents at home, but like I’m probably never gonna get sick of it, for real, it smells so good. Or I might go every other month swapping between that and Black Cherry Merlot because that’s awesome too. And then there’s Champagne Toast, I mean, that one might be a bit too feminine for you, but I love it. It’s sweet and just a tiny bit citrusy. I can’t do any of the floral or like, outdoorsy scents, they set my allergies off. And honestly there’s some of these that I smell them and I’m like, who is putting this in their house? Like, what nutjob thinks this scent is good? How many people have senses of smell that are this screwed up?” At this point I was rambling, talking excitedly and with my hands, handing him testers to smell and trying to gauge his reactions to know what to hand him next. He didn’t have any bad reactions to anything I gave him until I handed him the tester for Fresh Balsam. His nose scrunched up in the most adorable way and he very carefully set the tester down on the counter as far from him as he could manage. He handled my word-vomit good-naturedly, with a small smile on his face, nodding and chuckling when he thought something I had said was funny. Our fingers brushed a few times as I handed him the testers and after the third time, I began to feel like it was deliberate on his part, but it couldn’t have been, could it? He couldn’t really be interested in me. He’s Henry Cavill. I’m just, well, I’m just me.

Me, with my two minimum wage jobs, still living with my parents, inching ever closer to 30 years old. Why would he want any of that? Why would he be interested in me physically either? I mean, he’s literally flawless and I’m short, overweight, I eat like shit, I don’t exercise, hell, I barely know how to put on make-up correctly. Yeah, I look good today, but that’s not par-for-the-course.    

He put a few each of Cinnamon & Clove Buds, Black Cherry Merlot, Limoncello (for the bathrooms, he said), and Laundry Day (for the laundry room, obviously) in his basket along with enough of the plugs so he’d have one in each room. He also grabbed a Black Cherry Merlot and a Limoncello room spray off the shelf next to the Wallflower display before turning back to me. “So then, where do you keep this Spiced Apple Toddy that you like so much, or did you hide them so you could have them all to yourself?”

I chuckled nervously and ran my hand through my hair, sort of disbelieving that he was actually paying attention to what I had said. Boys never listen to me when I talk, I always have to repeat myself, but I guess that’s because I usually end up talking to the dumb ones. Henry’s not dumb. He really is just fucking perfect, isn’t he? Pretty and he listens? That shouldn’t be such a difficult combination to find, but for me it had been. “They’re on the table over here with the rest of our leftover Christmas stuff. Hopefully the tester is still there somewhere.” I put my hands in my apron pockets and I could feel the jolt of confidence I had had just minutes before leaving my body. His charm had worn me down, bringing me back to my normal, anxiety-ridden self. I caught the toe of my boot on the corner of one of the other tables as we walked towards the center of the room. I stumbled, but before I could fall his arm was already out to steady me, wrapping around my waist to keep me upright.

“Are you alright Y/N?” A look of genuine concern was on his face and I swear to God I swooned. Like, fuck, I just stubbed my stupid toe, it’s not that serious. I mean yeah, I stubbed my toe and then almost fell into a table covered with candles in glass holders, but like, I didn’t fall, you caught me, please stop looking at me like you care. You can’t give me that much hope. It isn’t fair. And goddamnit I love the way my name sounds coming out of your mouth. Like, fuck it’s never sounded so good. This isn’t fair, why is this happening?

“Yeah, Henry I’m fine, just a stubbed toe. Thank you for…you know.” I gestured down to his arm, which was still around my waist. The sound of me bumping into the table drew the attention of the rest of my co-workers, however, who were now coming out of their various positions to see what was going on and to make sure no one had broken anything. Samantha popped her head in from the front room and Kelynn and Mira came out from the cashwrap with Pilar and walked to the edge of the third room to peek in. All they saw was me, blushing profusely, with Henry Cavill’s beefy-ass arm still wrapped around my fucking waist. “Everything’s fine guys. I promise.”

“Holy shit, is that…”

“Mira!”

“But Kelynn that’s fucking Superman!”

“You can’t cuss in front of him Mira, he’s a customer!”

“Will you guys cut it out? You’re embarrassing us in front of the hunky British dude!”

“Hey, I’ve got an idea. How about we all pretend like this isn’t happening right now? Pilar can go back to the cashwrap, you two can go back to whatever it was you were doing, and I’ll go back to what I was doing, namely making a damn sale!” I extricated myself from Henry’s grasp so I could shoo them back towards the cashwrap. They turned and walked away, bewildered looks on their faces. I turned back to Henry who was shifting awkwardly from foot to foot, clearly uncomfortable. He cleared his throat and ran his hand through his curls, leaving them messier than they were before. An errant one fell over his forehead and I wanted to brush it out of the way, but he just left it.

I walked over to the table that I was originally heading for and found the Spiced Apple Toddy Wallflowers. There wasn’t that many left, but there was still a tester. I grabbed it and spun around to bring it to him, assuming he hadn’t followed me, but as I turned, I found myself going face first into his massive chest. I put my unoccupied hand up to steady myself and pushed on his chest to force him back. He was just too close. Why was he so close? He opened his mouth to say something but I beat him to it. “Here. This is what I have in my bedroom right now, this is Spiced Apple Toddy.” Oh god, why did I say it like that? The one I have in my bedroom. Jesus Christ. He quirked his eyebrow at me and cocked his head to the side, smirking a little. Instead of taking the tester from me, he took my much smaller hand in his, guiding it up towards his face so the tester was close to his nose. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. A serene smile spread across his face and I felt my face get hotter. He opened his eyes, looking down into mine. Fuck I could drown in those ocean eyes.

“Oh, I like that very much. You were right. I think that one’s my favourite.”

#henry cavill #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill x reader #my first henry fic #fluff #unintentional bath and body works ad #be gentle