#like yeah other disorders have bad stigma | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

schizopositivity · 1 year

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#idk if this has been done before #but these three disorders have so much in common in the stigma of it #like yeah other disorders have bad stigma #but not to the point of most people thinking you are a murderer simply because of your disorder #schizophrenia #aspd #antisocial personality disorder #did #dissociative identity disorder #mental illness #nd #neurodivergent #actuallyschizophrenic #mental health awareness #plz dont derail with other disorders

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halogalopaghost · 8 months

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Hey idk who needs to hear this, but tagging disfigurement/serious injury/etc etc as "body horror" Is Bad and I'm gonna need you guys to stop doing that immediately please. Tag as "gore", "injury", hell you can even tag "disfigurement", but injuries and/or physical appearances within the realm of physical possibility should not be tagged "body horror".

What you need to understand is that "body horror" is a fictitious concept. It's when something has too many eyes, too many ribs, a head that moves 360°, joints that bend backward, etc. Body horror is NOT a missing limb; burns or burn scarring; broken bones; disfigured, missing, or otherwise atypical of facial features; congenital disorders; surgical scars, etc.

When asking yourself if you should tag body horror, consider this: is it something that can happen to a real human person? If the answer is yes, don't tag body horror.

People with physical disabilities and atypical features suffer enough othering and stigma as-is; let's not talk about actual people like scary horror creatures, yeah?

EDIT: sighs. Ya'll have the reading comprehension of a fucking bonobo. I AM HYPERMOBILE, I know joints sometimes move a little funky. That's kind of the point here, no? If the mobility is within the range of an actual human then don't tag it body horror! Doug Jones DNI (joke)

#I'm not a professional so please let me know if I've incorrectly used a term!#I'm also not part of the affected group so if someone who IS would like to speak up/take over #please do #disability #body horror #no clowning allowed on this post pls #the ghost speaks

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syscourse-confessions · 9 months

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Syscourse replies encouraged... i cant type the emoji LOL

Some people say that non-traumagenic plurals are hurting traumagenic people. Naming names is bad. You've seen people say that, though, obviously. If you are invested in syscourse to any degree, you've probably seen people say that doctors have denied them diagnoses or treatment because DID and OSDD have become "trendy" and they think it's too common, so they won't diagnose anyone with it.

Listen to me closely. For context, I tried to get diagnosed with DID since I was 11 years old. Symptoms start showing up before that, it's perfectly reasonable for me to be self-aware since that diagnosis would've been the only proof I have that I was ever traumatised (other than the proof in my memories obviously). I tried getting diagnosed LONG before TikTok OR Musically existed, AND ALSO BEFORE VINE DIED, and let's be honest, TikTok is where those doctors found out about them. (I say "doctors" because both therapists and psychiatrists can technically diagnose you, even if it's usually more commonly done by therapists who specialise in trauma.)

They will find ANY reason not to diagnose you. My abusers were awful in front of the doctors. I had memories of trauma. I was told once that since I didn't know what the word dissociation meant (since I was 12 and my psychiatrist called it MPD for some reason) that I didn't dissociate. Yep! You don't have the language, so your problem doesn't exist! That's how far doctors are willing to go thanks to the stigma ALREADY EXISTING around plurality and systemhood. I had a therapist who asked me if I had homocidal urges in response to me saying I suspect that I have DID. I had a therapist call them characters and say she wouldn't diagnose me because I had nonhuman alters. I had a therapist (I've gone through a lot of them as you can see) tell me that since I can't remember specific details about my trauma (I was molested frequently as a toddler) then it didn't happen and therefore I don't have it. I was told I don't have it because the alters have different accents!! Some alters have southern accents (I grew up in Florida but then moved to Cali) and others have northern ones, one even has a new york-ish accent that i don't know the technical name of, and they were like. this very common thing you have is the reason i don't think you have it :) awful

THEY WILL REFUSE TO DIAGNOSE YOU FOR ANY REASON. NON-TRAUMAGENIC SYSTEMS ARE NOT TO BLAME.THE SYSTEM OF S O C I E T Y IS

(haha like my pun?)

thank u for reading. sorry for yelling at the end there

also it's worth mentioning that earlier this year I did get diagnosed, finally. I figured out that I need to ask our insurance provider for specifically therapists who are trauma specialists, and then the one I found was like "im not qualified enough for this woops" and referred me to an even better trauma specialist who specifically knew about dissociative disorders. so yeah try that i guess LOL. I have every symptom, it turns out. I'm a textbook case. Doctors just suck.

��- Syscourse replies encouraged

#syscourse #syscourse confessions #abuse tw #csa tw

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avpdpossum · 1 year

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Hello! Hoping anyone that comes across this could share their thoughts as well, but I was curious if you consider personality disorders on their own as neurodivergent? Why or why not? Thank you

they absolutely are neurodivergent!

i think a lot of people’s introduction to the concept of neurodivergence is through the autistic and adhd communities, and that leads people to assume neurodivergence only includes things you’re born with, but that’s not actually the case.

here’s how i would explain neurodivergence:

the social Powers That Be in our current (Western, capitalist, etc) society have designated certain ways of thinking, feeling, perceiving, and so on as the Correct Ways of Existing.

most of our world is built on the assumption that everyone’s brains will work that way, because that’s the way they “should” work. when people’s brains don’t work that way, it’s assumed that the solution is to find a way to “fix” them or get rid of them.

as a result, people whose brains do work in that way have an easier time navigating the world and are generally treated better by it, while people whose brains deviate from that expectation in some way have a more difficult time navigating a world not built with them in mind and are treated as “wrong”/“bad”.

people in the first group, who can navigate the world with very little added stigma or difficulty as a result of the way their brains work, would be considered neurotypical.

people in the second group, who do face added stigma and barriers to functioning as a result of the way their brains work, would be considered neurodivergent.

so, if you want to determine if something makes someone neurodivergent, you can ask yourself a few questions:

does it have to do with their psychology/neurology?

does it affect their thinking, emotions, perceptions, or other brain functions in a way that is considered “abnormal” by current social norms?

does it carry a stigma and make them more likely to be mistreated?

does it cause them extra difficulty with navigating and functioning in the world?

if the answers to those questions are yes, chances are it’s a form of neurodivergence!

so, if we look at those questions for personality disorders:

this is the easiest answer — yes!

personality disorders are classified as “mental illnesses”, put in the dsm, and generally assumed to be under the jurisdiction of psychiatry, so i think we can pretty safely say that yes, personality disorders are seen as “abnormal” forms of brain functioning according to current social norms.

personality disorders and their traits are incredibly stigmatized — pwpds are assumed to be violent, abusive, generally bad people, and so on. this is most visibly true for cluster b pds, but stigma against the other pds and against the personality disorder category in general is also very real. so this one’s a yes — pwpds are very frequently mistreated on the basis of our brains being “wrong”.

personality disorders, by definition, come with some sort of functioning difficulties, and the world isn’t built to accommodate those differences in functioning. as an example, think of the high expectations of emotional regulation (not “too” emotional but not “cold” either) and social capability in professional spaces, even ones where emotions and social interactions don’t affect a person’s ability to do the job well. that makes this one a yes too; a society that took pwpds into account would seek to accommodate the areas we struggle with and ensure that there’s a place for us, and that definitely isn’t happening right now.

so yeah, according to my own personal understanding of neurodivergence, personality disorders absolutely count. we diverge from the assumed norms of psychological/neurological functioning, so we count as neurodivergent, even those of us who aren’t also neurodivergent in other ways.

on a personal level, i can say i feel no real difference in how i internally experience being audhd vs how i experience my personality disorders — they both just feel like my brain doing its thing, sometimes in ways that are unpleasant/difficult for me to deal with and sometimes in ways that just feel totally fine and unremarkable from my point of view. i also rarely notice a difference in how neurotypical people treat them — they usually don’t know the difference between audhd “weirdness” vs avoidant/narcissistic/schizospec/dissociative “weirdness”, it’s all just one big blob of Weird And Bad And Wrong to most people. the only time they’re ever really treated as different is when certain other neurodivergent people try to separate the two.

trying to draw lines between neurodivergence and “mental illness” (which is usually what’s happening when people say pds aren’t a form of neurodivergence) doesn’t actually help anyone. in my opinion, it’s basically just a way for certain people to try to get ahead by putting other people down — it says “accept us because we’re different in the good way, not in the bad way! we’re not sick like those people!” and that kind of attitude doesn’t do anyone any good. sure, the experiences that come with having a since-birth neurodivergence can be different from those that come with having an acquired neurodivegence, but people within those groups also have different experiences because everyone’s experience is going to be unique, we’re all different people in different circumstances! diversity of experiences among neurodivergent people is to be expected and is honestly a good thing, not a reason to avoid associating with each other.

in my experience, the people who insist that pds aren’t true neurodivergences are usually pretty damn sanist toward pwpds - they exclude us because they don’t want to be associated with us, they want to be accepted but they don’t think we should be so they try to make us seem totally different from them. in reality, neurodivergence is a broad umbrella and there’s room under it for all of us.

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lookingforcactus · 3 months

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I have a lot of Feelings about the way that people talk about autism being "just autism" and act like being ""only"" autistic automatically excludes people from being physically disabled.

Yes, the shit that physically disabled people have to deal with is different than the shit people who are able-bodied and neurodivergent have to deal with.

You know how I know that??? Because my ""just autism"" has made me physically disabled for years at a time.

A lot of autistic people are physically disabled, especially but not exclusively people with level 2 and level 3 autism.

A ton of autistic people have motor issues to a level that makes them physically disabled. If you don't have the motor abilities/physical ability to do things like tie your own shoes, or use a regular fork, or shower yourself, or be stable and safe while walking, is that not a physical disability?

Now, none of that is how my autism sometimes makes me physically disabled - I'm level 1 autism, and aside from some fine motor skills I'm personally mostly fine on those fronts. (For people who don't know, "level 1 autism" is more or less what a lot of people would term ""high functioning,"" but that is problematic and outdated terminology.)

So, you might be wondering "Well then how the hell does being autistic make you physically disabled??"

Well, first of all, it's genuinely not that rare for masking to be so, so hard on and physically stressful for autistic people (yes including and specifically level 1 autistic people) that they just fucking. develop chronic pain. sometimes so severe they're regularly in and out of emergency rooms. Because stress hormones are literally toxic/cause tissue damage, and because being completely tensed up and sensory guarding and in sensory pain all the time causes a shitton of muscular dysfunction and chronic pain.

That's happened to me somewhat/occasionally - there are other people it impacts a lot more.

My main problem?

Autism significantly affects your ability to regulate sensory and nerve input.

Meaning when I have a significant injury, between that and all the tension/distortion/related pain, that injury can last for literal years.

I spent three years with on-and-off Significant mobility restrictions because I got an ankle injury.

I just finished two years of chronic pain/sensory pain and a big reduction in functioning/cognitive everything, which was so bad it left me housebound for the first six months, as the result of a surgery that is super common and super does not do this to most people.

Does that not count as physically disabled??

People also tend to treat physical disability as something that by definition never goes away, but people move in and out of physical disability all the time. Our society just tends to use really restricted definitions of what "counts" as a disability, due to stigma, rather than looking at it as a significant and/or long-term impairment in your ability to do things. If you have a severe injury, it can leave you unable to move normally/walk/walk unassisted for months or years. And then, eventually, hopefully you heal and do a lot of physical therapy and then you may not count as disabled after x amount of time.

(I'm not just making this up btw, this is a major tenet of a lot of modern disability studies. I could cite a bunch of texts for this but tbh I'm not investing that kind of time.)

Also the mind-body division is fake, which is why a lot of disabilities and disorders that affect the brain/nervous system (you know, like autism) also affect the body. You know, the thing your nervous system runs through basically all of.

So, yeah, I'm not trying to tell anyone else how they can or should identify, but I personally describe myself as "previously physically disabled" and/or "intermittently physically disabled" because that is the most accurate way I've found to describe my own experience.

Okay, rant over, thanks for coming to my ted talk.

#autism #actually autistic #neurodivergence #disability #actually disabled #physical disability #anyway I'm not going to discourse about this but I've been seeing “”just autism“” and “autistic ppl aren't physically disabled” comments #more often lately #and I needed to get this off my chest #like if “literally housebound for six months due to pain and mobility restrictions” doesn't count as physically disabled #then that's a very weird definition of physically disabled #me

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nothing0fnothing · 6 months

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heyo! i would just like to apologise on behalf of the NPD community for the idiots that are frothing at the mouth trying to claim that narc abuse isn't real. yeah, we get it, pwNPD ≠ abusive. doesnt mean you get to dictate how victims should view their trauma, much less make it seem invalid. pwNPD make things so much worse if they aren't grounded! do they seriously think pwNPD are cute little bunnies who just want validation? i myself am a pwNPD, and it is soo cringe omfg. all this so-called npd positivity sickens me. you're convincing pwNPD that their problematic attention-seeking behaviour is acceptable. if pre-aware me saw all those posts, i would've never sought to change my behaviour and seek a healthier source of supply. i admit, i was abusive. no BS. i literally took pleasure in others being scared of me, to the point i would bully my own sister to tears and gaslit her into thinking it was her fault. i was fucking 10. i needed that slap on the face to finally realise this was not how i was supposed to be. i got my help, i got the support i need, i'm trying to be a better person. now thats the type of positivity we need. i dont want people telling me that 'i just want to be acknowledged'. no, wanting to be acknowledged is normal. my desire was unhealthy and violent. i needed someone to beat me up and tell me not everything about me and that i shouldn't want to beat someone up for doing something better than me. Thanks for listening to my TedTalk! 😊 - 🩹

A super well considered and realistic view of what it means to be a narcissistic abuse denier and its roots in anti therapy/anti recovery rhetoric from the POV of a person who actually has NPD.

You're very right, to be a pwNPD and to argue that victims and survivors shouldn't have a community based on their shared experience of abuse because you feel personally victimised by the conversation is trying to dictate our recovery to us. It's attempting to invalidate our experience and its hella indicative of real life abusive behavior.

Thank you for sharing personal details of your own experience with NPD. I know it's hard, I know it's not fun for you and I'm sorry your safe spaces have been hijacked by wannabes and fakers pretending that to have this disorder is cool and edgy. You don't feel cool and edgy for having this disorder, because it's a real mental illness that effects your life daily, not a quirk you get to take off when you close the app and go into your life.

Support is out there for people with NPD or people who suspect they have it. It's not as fun or exciting to get help than it is to run a edgy tumblr blog that perpetuates further abuse and stigmatises people with NPD, but our mental health is our responsibility, and anti recovery and anti treatment narcissistic abuse denial blogs are just perpetrating further harm and stigma. The people who beleive in it will never get better, and it's sad, but you didn't fall into believing the narrative that NPD is untreatable. You got help though it was hard and you learned to be better.

I don't condone violence to correct bad behaviour, I don't think you needed to be hit to learn better. The desire to do better and be a good person is in all of us, and I hope you know that the decent human being you are today is thanks to your own hard work, your commitment to consistency in therapy, your strength to understand your disorder, not the time you were hit to learn better.

Thank you for your support, plaster emoji, I really appreciate it. Your Ted talk was an incredible read and I'd be pleased to hear from you again 💕

#narcissistic abuse #narcissistic personality disorder awareness #narcissism positivity #narcissism awareness #surviving narcissism #actually npd #npd awareness #narcissistic abuse is real #narcissism is not npd #therapy #mental health support

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nite-puff · 1 year

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I feel you so much on the Mondo thing... Where every character falls into some kinda category based on how liked they are (there are the ones everyone likes, ones everyone hates, the underrated characters, etc.), Mondo's sort of floating off in this innocuous void?? Obviously he has a cult following and he has his haters, but most of the fandom just kinda doesn't even care?? It's complete indifference, and the only reason he isn't considered an underrated character is because he's in one of the much more popular ships. Other than some characters from dr3, I kinda consider him to be the MOST underrated character. Because with characters like Hiro and Akane, at least people KNOW they're underrated. People actively look at them and think "there's more to them that we don't get to see", but with Mondo, most of his major lore details are handed to you right in chapter 2. He is made REMARKABLY easy to understand, and I don't consider that to be a writing flaw in the slightest. But I think as a result of this people just look at him, go "alright, I've seen all there is to see", and then move on without much further consideration. Then with Mondo enjoyers themselves, the line between those who like him as an individual versus those who like him as an add-on to Kiyotaka or even Chihiro is clear as day, to the point where you see people get some really surface level characterization wrong (Like I hate to be that guy but people don't make Mondo nearly the level of sopping wet beast roaming around in the middle of the target parking lot all alone as they should). Then the people who actually care about the guy write 90 page essays on him. Like there's no in-between.

YES YES I 100% AGREE!!!

I remember seeing this Instagram post back in 2021 when Danganronpa kinda had that popularity resurgence (aka when I joined the fandom). It was one of those “starter pack”memes and went something like “‘Characters the fandom doesn’t care about unless it’s shipping’ starter pack” and Mondo was part of it. And I no joke thought, “Oh wow, they included Mondo,” like I was completely expecting for him to be overlooked.

It’s rare nowadays to find a character or trial or what-have-you that’s actually underrated when it comes to the mainline DR games. Most that were probably underrated at some point just kept being talked about how underrated they were until they weren’t really considered underrated anymore.

But Mondo is underrated and no one really talks about it because no one cares. At least, outside of his small group of fans.

There’s so much analysis and deep dives you can do with him from masculinity, to negative stigmas, to repressed and untreated mental disorders. Like, he’s one of the few characters who was written to have a mental disorder (ptsd, albeit with some negative stereotypes). He’s a scared kid hiding behind the mask of a fearless leader, and the game does a great job at showing that. But no one talks about it.

And that lack of talk amongst the fandom is what eventually led to the fanon Mondo we have today. No one really wanted to analyze what he brought to the table and so people just started viewing him as the surface level macho bad boy stereotype that he was WRITTEN TO SUBVERT.

I do think that there’s some sort of devolution from that version of him that’s been happening the past couple of years with those fans who would “write 90 page essays of him” coming into the scene, and that’s great. Love that for him. I’m glad that, while he’s not nearly talked about enough, there’s been a slight increase of interest of him as an individual character and not as a ship or foil.

Anyways yeah, “Make Mondo Relevant in the Fandom 2023.” Let’s make it happen.

#okay NOW the ranting’s done #I have things to do now #I hope you all enjoyed this brief trip through my thoughts #danganronpa #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #mondo owada #ask #long post #I’ll stop clogging the mondo tag now #ramblepuff #askpuff

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xxlovelynovaxx · 11 months

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You know something that's interesting?

The way that because some people believe plurality can only ever be traumagenic, knowing that your origin is traumagenic is considered like, good and expected, and by extension in inclusive spaces it then becomes widely accepted and expected for people to be certain about their origins...

but that this doesn't extent to other forms of neurodivergence that can have multiple origins.

(I use plural origin terms here because they describe the origin of other forms of neurodivergence just fine)

Like, when I say I'm mixed origin in inclusive plural spaces, people are like "oh yeah it totally makes sense that you would know that".

But when I say that my schizophrenia or MADD is traumagenic, or that my anxiety is autigenic/endogenic, or that my NPD is mixed origin neurogenic and traumagenic, etc... it's basically *crickets* "but how could you possibly know that?"

It's especially bad with the stuff that has been pathologized and medicalized to the extreme, like NPD, which even in places where the demonization and stigma is less, is still believed to never be a "naturally occuring" neurotype.

But it can also be bad with the ones that science says are "largely endogenic" like schizophrenia. I will say I absolutely was already "primed" for it, and it may have occurred regardless, but my trauma ABSOLUTELY specifically triggered it and got so wrapped up in its development that at most, it's traumaendo.

Also, some disorders are not really associated with "origins", like anxiety, but my autism is absolutely responsible for the formation of my anxiety.

Anyway, I guess my point is... trust neurodivergent people on their own experiences? Even when their ways of interpreting, expressing, or describing them diverge from hegemonical psychiatric-industrial paradigms of understanding around said neurodivergence.

Or to put it more simply, neurodivergent people know the most about their own experiences, even especially more than neurotypical psych professionals and their rigid medicalized understanding of neurodivergence

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ask-spidermom · 4 months

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... an imaginary friend who overstays her welcome far into one's teenage years, and other early indications.

feat. @ask-spider-therapist as conjured in the mind of victoria's favourite spider.

“I guess maybe I should start at the beginning. Or- well…” Ez sighs, “What I can remember of it? I guess my childhood was what you’d call ‘eventful’ but I don’t actually know how because I… I have…”

“A dissociative disorder.” Dr. Sims— or rather, a shifting dream construct created to rehearse the possibility of talking to Dr. Sims— finished.

“Yeah. It’s been on the backburner for a long time, because it’s never interfered with my life this bad and- um… I don’t know, even people I’m friends with can be kind of weird about that sort of thing.”

“How so?”

“They think people are just faking it for attention, or using it as an excuse to act out, or too impossibly rare to be understood. Off the top of my head, like, three of my friends have either DID or OSDD and that’s- to me, at least, provably false. But… I don’t know.”

“So you’re worried about how the stigma around plurality could affect your personal relationships?” Dr. Sims nodded thoughtfully, “That’s a perfectly valid concern. Not everyone should be entitled to the details of your health, mental or physical- especially if you feel it puts you in danger.”

“Yeah, exactly. It’s just gotten to the point where things are getting very difficult to hide. Like, before now I’ve only ever had symptoms within the confines of my own head. But now? The dogs are out and they’re talking in noticeable, non-ez accents. I’m not even against it, it’s just… Everytime this sort of thing happens, it suddenly tapers off then I think it was just a fluke until it happens again.”

A voice jokes from within— Wow, it’s almost like there’s some kind of barrier between the disparate parts of your fractured identity states. Some sort of… Dis-association, even.

“I wanna be able to communicate, but I realize that might entail…” Ez grimaces, “Well, one of my primary skills is that when a thought or memory arises that makes me scared and uncomfortable, I just put that thang back where it came from. It’s practically second nature.”

“It sounds like you’ve used avoidance as your primary coping mechanism for a long time, now. Now, Ez– if you feel you’re not ready to confront these past traumas, I won’t make you. In many cases, forcing someone to process a traumatic event before they’ve healed enough ends up causing more harm than good. Still, it’s important to keep this in mind, moving forward.”

Ez nods, watching their hands fidget in their lap, “I’ll get there. Hopefully.”

#spidermom.txt #ooc

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alostlittleriverlotus · 2 years

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I answer questions on Quora to help fight the rampant anti-intellectualism and ableism on that site. Cause dear God it's bad with personality disorders, but that site comes up when you are asking questions about PDs a lot so I try.

★IMPORTANT, rant on ableism around narcissistic abuse. Literally just angry emotions. Finishes with positivity for disorders cause we all fucking deserve better.★

Literally said narcissistic abuse wasn't real. Someone agreed with all my points except that one and tried to tell me it's cause it's unique abuse.

Of course every abuse affected by a disorder is unique. My abuse was added to by the fact my parents are autistic and my mother especially struggles to understand others' perspectives. My abuse is unique because of how my ex's GAD and ADHD affected his treatment of me so much so that I refused to use the term ADHD (I used ADD instead) for myself and rejected my GAD diagnosis because it reminded me of him. That doesn't mean it was ADHD abuse or autistic abuse or anything. Every instance of abuse is unique especially when an abuser has certain disorders. It doesn't mean you should use tags like {disorder} abuse. It equates that disorder with being abusive. And yes ADHD and GAD were triggers for me for a long time. Did I go around acting as if people with it were my enemies? Fuck no. Cause that was one instance. A single guy. I literally ended up diagnosed with GAD a few months after I finally got his ass outta my life.

Just cause abuse happens and a disorder the abuser has may influence how the treatment is does not mean {disorder} abuse is real or a valid term. It equates a disorder with abuse or being an abuser and with disorders like NPD, it worsens stigma that already exists. It further pushes the idea that people with NPD aren't abused or can't be abused despite it being a trauma disorder. My traits of NPD I show? Come from neglect and abuse in my family. I crave attention and use it as some of my only show of love because I never got that shit. I want to be praised because I was constantly degraded so what little praise I got, early on, I used to show I was better than my brothers so they couldn't put me down or make fun of me anymore. I latched onto any praise I could get because that's all I had. I became arrogant and narcissistic to protect myself, to give myself some semblance of self worth when I loathed the fact I was even alive at literally age 12. I'm still not confident enough to say I have NPD, but I show NPD traits. And I'm doing research and learning.

So yeah. And any time people with NPD speak up, they're told they're just gaslighting or of course they're being arrogant or they're trying to silence victims.

Your abusers were a single instance. Even if your abuser has NPD, it does NOT make these people your enemy. You are triggered by a disorder a stranger has. Seeing a stranger have a disorder reminds you of your abuser. You fall down this little rabbit hole of "narcissistic abuse" and you villainize them all as some way to have control when you felt so out of control. All you're doing is further pushing your own pain onto others. All you're doing is demonizing a demonized disorder, preventing people with NPD from getting help, treating them like scum because you may or may not have been abused by someone with NPD. A whole group of thousands or more of people demonized because your abuser may or may not have had NPD. Because of your personal experiences that these strangers know nothing about. And the experiences of theirs and their abuse that you have ignored.

Who is really the one hurting victims of abuse? When that kinda shit prevents people from learning about NPD? When it makes people with NPD feel like unlovable monsters? When you call these strangers hollow or not even human? You are not helping by projecting your pain onto others. You are not helping by being so caught up in your abuse that you demonize a disorder. Especially since most people with NPD most likely had an NPD parent.

Healing is not shitting on a group of complete strangers because of your own abuse. That does nothing to help you heal, only to make you feel justified and trying to make some sense of your abuse. People with NPD aren't your enemy. And if you think that or that people with NPD or another personality disorder are abusive or that narcissistic abuse or any other {disorder} abuse is real, then you won't fucking like me. So either you can try to listen and learn or you can leave. Cause I'm willing to give a chance to educate, but if you won't bother to actually learn, go ahead and just stay away from me. Cause this blog is NPD safe. This blog is NPD positive.

This goes for any disorder. This goes for any personality disorder. Cluster A, Cluster B, Cluster C. Paranoid, Schizoid, Schizotypal, Antisocial, Avoidant, Borderline, Histrionic, Obsessive-Compulsive, Narcissistic, Dependent. Y'all are all valid. Any stigma, any ignoring of your disorders, anything at all fucking sucks. I see you, you're valid, your experiences are your own, and you fucking deserve better. PDs deserve better recognition, better education, better help available, and a lot less fucking stigma. I have multiple (Paranoid, Histrionic, Borderline, Avoidant, Dependent) and I suspect Narcissistic and Schizotypal and/or Schizoid (still learning and focusing on that first and foremost.) So I fucking know. We're all valid af and fucking deserve better. Fucking keep being hot as hell and getting through this life. You've come so far and you've done great things even if you've fucked up sometimes. All the love for personality disorders.

Oh and extra love for DID and OSDD and any other dissociative disorder. This was about personality disorders, but oh my god DID and OSDD and whatever are so fucking unknown or uneducated about. I've learned so much from systems on here. And DID is also heavily demonized. Y'all all fucking deserve so much better and you rock. Cause not only are y'all demonized, but y'all are ignored, claimed to be fake way too often, and OSDD is literally unheard of and under researched especially. So just a big ol' props to you! And the schizospec folks that also get used as horror movie tropes and get demonized as well. Honestly just love for the unknown or heavily demonized disorders. We all fucking deserve better. And love for the more known and less demonized disorders. Y'all deserve love too.

Anyway. Drink your water, take care of yourself the best you can, keep working towards a better future for yourself (whatever that may look like), fight for what matters, and make sure to take your meds if you have any and to eat some stuff. Y'all fucking rock! Keep being awesome and I wish you all well :)

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stinkrascal · 6 months

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A couple things I was wondering is how did you figure out you had BPD? I know there's a couple disorders that can often get diagnosed beforehand, so I guess how did you know there was more going on? Secondly, what kind of therapy do you feel was the most helpful, if any? I have issues keeping a therapist because they tuxedo mask away after realizing I already have CBT down (which only kind of helps me). Thank you for being open about BPD! I feel like there's so much unnecessary stigma.

hiiiiii!! sorry i didnt reply yesterday i spent all day writing my silly sims stories 😴 i will talk about my experience under the cut!! ty for being curious about it!! <3

umm tbh i was diagnosed in a really weird way lol. so, like, where i went to high school was a really conservative and religious town, and when i was a freshman in high school i was one of the only trans/lgbt kids that was vocally out at my school. there were more of them, my friend group was basically all lgbt ppl, but i was the only person in my school who would demand staff to call me a different name/use different pronouns. but anyways so my lgbt friend group was being bullied pretty badly so our school hired this counselor training in lgbt issues that would talk to us individually about our experiences as lgbt kids who were bullied and such. it was actually really cool you know! but anyways i was one of the students who had to participate in this and the lady who was talking to me realized that i was, like, a really troubled kid lol. and on top of that i was failing all my classes and i had been struggling in school my entire life (like consistently making report cards with at least 5/7 of the classes being failed type of shit) sooooo they basically had this like idk meeting with my parents? where they were super adamant that they take me to a doctor and put me into therapy bc i was struggling really badly and yeah. after that my parents put me into therapy and got in touch w a doctor and i got some treatment and eventually a bpd diagnosis. but yea it only happened cuz of my school forcing them to take me ha.

the truth is i didn't really suspect anything was wrong with me because the way i grew up, i thought everyone acted like me 🤷‍♂️ i think the only time i started really thinking i might have bpd was when i got my first boyfriend at 16, that's when my codependency and attachment issues really started to manifest, and those have always consistently been the bpd symptoms i struggle the most with. but even back then i didn't really know what bpd was, so it wasn't like i was specifically thinking i was suffering w bpd. more so that i knew something was Off about me but i couldn't really explain what it was

unfortunately i haven't gone to therapy in a long time :( and the last time i went it wasn't for bpd treatment at all. so i really can't say what could help you there in terms of therapy. i did group therapy during my bpd treatment but it didn't really help me much.

you're probably not gonna like this answer lmao but i use weed to medicate my intense mood swings and that helps a lot. also just being able to recognize when i need to cool off and being able to use my words to tell ppl that i need to be alone for a minute to clear my head, that helps too. basically just being mindful of ur changing emotions and giving yourself room to feel those emotions and allow them to pass u, without feeling guilt for this, and without projecting those emotions onto other ppl bc at the end of the day it isn't really anyone else's fault that u feel the way you do.

also just try to give ppl the benefit of the doubt in general, ik my bpd makes me SO sensitive like for example. ik we make jokes about this but you guys im not kidding, my favorite mutual reblogging a post from someone else instead of me hurts my feelings so bad some days i have to just log off and go cry about it. CRY ABOUT IT YOU GUYS! it's really awful and totally not grounded in reality 😭 but like it's there, it's something i experience and deal with, and it isn't anyone's fault that it happens, it's just the cards i was dealt with.

so instead of projecting that feeling onto my beloved mutuals and being like Ohhhhh so you actually hate me! You actually want me to kill myself! You've actually never cared about me ever, person I've had two conversations with in total! yeah instead of working myself up for something so silly... i just try to put myself in other ppls shoes, try to remember that when i do things it is not with malicious intent and most people are also not doing things with malicious intent. bc for me, my bpd tends to dehumanize ppl... they arent people with nuance and depth and complex and at times contradictory lives, theyre my Favorite Person, person who does no wrong, person who could never do any wrong no matter how hard they try, and that's dehumanizing, that's unfair to the person!! so by humanizing the other person, by remembering we are all people with rich inner lives and struggles and most of us just want to do our best even when we slip and fall... it helps calm me down from those spirals where im like, ohhhhh god everyone hates me because they didn't reblog a text post from meeeee!!! lol

#jade answers #Anonymous

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violentviolette · 1 year

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is it normal when trying to research pds you might have to feel a kinda vehement denial about it? ive been researching aspd for years (finally got comfortable saying i have it) but just recently started looking into npd and it feels like every time i see a person talking about their experiences with it my brain gets really cagey about it. i'll go from "oh yeah i totally get x thing" to "i am absolutely NOT someone with npd" to trying to justify that thought to myself??? tbf i've gone through this before with aspd and having to slowly break down my hang ups about it but i'm just curious if this is normal or has some underlying meaning to it and isn't some crazy bought of internalized ableism that won't go away lol. i realize you might not be the best person to ask about this since you're professionally diagnosed iirc but i digress

oh yea i think thats absolutely a very common thing that happens and i think its kind of an expected part of the process, especially in the early stages. i think there's multiple factors and things that go into what builds those kinds of responses but i think its just kind of natural given the nature of all this stuff i never had that issue with my aspd diagnosis, because id been diagnosed with CD so early on i always knew i didnt have empathy and so i just didnt reject it like that. but the first time a therapist suggested i might have npd i flipped out about it internally lol i was like "oh absolutely not i definitly dont have that" and struggled and fought with it for a while. even once id accepted i probably did have it, i was still really mad about it i think it's kind of natural when uve thought about urself one way for a chunk of ur life, to at first reject anything that challenges that or says that u might be someone different and ur motives might not be what u thought they were. and i think this is exacerbated when u have a cluster b disorder because of all the stigma surrounding them and how much shame and negativity is just unavoidable

sometimes there's also the "uniqueness" factor. a lot of us experienced heavy rejection as kids and learned very quickly that we were not like others and our experiences were very different. this can create a kind of defensive bubble where we reject identifying with others in order to preserve that feeling of otherness/uniqueness/specialness because we have learned to find comfort in it and challenging that can break a lot of other maladaptive coping mechanisms we've built so we shy away from it. this can also go in the negative direction where we second guess ourselves by downplaying our own experiences and invalidating our symptoms. things like "oh well im not that bad they have it way worse i dont qualify cause its only a little" type of mindsets i also think for npd especially, there can be a kind of uncomfortableness with seeing our own symptoms reflected back at us at first. i have a hard time being close friends with other ppl with npd because when i recognize behaviors in them that i also do, i get really uncomfortable and embarrassed. it triggers a lot of my own insecurities and anxieties and so there's that initial knee jerk reaction to be like "im Not like that" even when deep down we know we are. i think thats understandable given our disorders and struggles and is just something that u have to work to slowly break down. npd comes with a lot of feelings of shame and rejection and so it just takes time to unwrite that instinct, but i do think it eventually goes away for most people especially if ur actively acknowledging it and working on it

#jack.speaks #anon #npd #cluster b pd #aspd #cluster b

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redstrewn · 7 months

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Musa here! About the diagnosis; i know it can be jarring to have to suddenly see yourself and past behavior from such a lens, thats how i felt after my autism diagnosis. But now i wish i had the diagnosis sooner, especially in childhood. For me, my diagnosis helped me acknowledge my needs and to be nicer to myself. As a kid, i was sometimes seen as hurtful and mean bc of my bluntness, dishonest bc of the lack of eye contact, and i had huge issues making and keeping friends (i still am friends with 1 girl from elementary school tho). I think that, if i had the diagnosis at that time, i wouldnt have believed i was a bad child like the teachers thought i was. Basically, what i want to say is pls take this as an opportunity to be kinder to yourself. (Also, with personality disorders theres this horrible stigma of being ‘evil’. As someone who believed that of themselves i wanna say that no it isnt true at all! Theres no disease that makes you evil and many horrible deeds have been done/are done by people who are completely sound of mind but are simply hateful and sadistic)

Hey Musa c: Thanks for this. I can relate with the jarring feeling, since I came in thinking I was gonna be given the ADHD label and walked out slapped with a mood disorder BAHAHAHAH

But yeah, the diagnosis is helping me as well. I also think a bit about how much better things would've been had I gotten it sooner.

Without it, I also experienced negativity from others: my struggles with being mentally and emotionally unwell not being taken seriously. Being reprimanded for being "lazy" and sensitive. Et cetera.

And yeah, I was cruel to myself. I believed them. I hated myself for "being dramatic" and "emo," unable to pull myself together when others kept on going with school, life, work, whatnot.

Getting this diagnosis has suddenly legitimized my struggles in people's eyes. Woke them up. Now they take me seriously. And yeah, it's a relief to know that I wasn't just being a wuss all this time. That I had a right to complain about the things I've gone through and continue to go through. It allows me to, like you said, be kinder to myself. Instead of blaming myself for not having pulled myself together, now I'm softer with the way I think of myself: all this time, I've had a mood disorder, and that means I couldn't have always magically willed away all its debilitating symptoms I didn't know I was having (I thought it was the average human experience).

And yeah, on stigma: it's a bit worrisome to trust anyone IRL with the knowledge of my diagnosis. There's too many misconceptions around it. Too much ignorance. Too many assumptions could be made about me and change the way they treat me.

But thanks for showing me there's people out there who understand. It means a lot, and it makes me feel not alone.

Here's to understanding ourselves better and being kinder to ourselves. We deserve it 🍻

Solidarity to people with different working brainz 🤝 We deserve kindness.

#not touchstarved #personal #musa

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sjweminem · 1 year

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hey im not that other anon but their ask gave me the balls to say i think its really cool youre not ashamed of your scars or talking about them. i recently got a real fucking doozy along most of my upper arm from a really bad day that went south and ofc i couldnt go get stitches so ive been super self conscious about it because its my biggest ive gotten before and seeing you post selfies and stuff is really encouraging for me to accept that its there and stuff but yeah just wanted to say thanks for inadvertently helping me feel better about my scars man

i'm glad! i can't really see my scars/fresh wounds after all these years and my mom says the same. i don't think about them at all except when i'm caring for fresh injuries but other than that i just dress and present myself however i want i guess? i developed some of my severe disorders at 4 or 5 years old and my parents made a point to raise me knowing firmly that nothing about my mental illness is something to hide or be ashamed of; that i don't owe it to anyone to censor myself for the comfort of Normal people. i recommend adopting that belief system if you can. i've never felt stigma or judgment simply bc it can't reach me. i'm like "i had 44 rounds of electroconvulsive therapy do you wanna hear some stories?" "oh i have the funniest story about this scar," etc. it just..feels normal to me lol i have no problem answering anybody who asks about my arms or legs, stranger or not. i hope you can make peace like that, i can't imagine carrying the weight of stigma/shame along with that of what already plagues you

#anonymous #correspondence

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aronarchy · 2 years

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Sysmeds seem to be completely unable to be critical of the DSM or anything else they read if it’s “official,” lol.

The fight to exclude non-distressed impairment from definitions of disorder is a hard-fought ongoing battle by disability activists.

Currently, what is considered “functioning wrong” is determined entirely by (white Western) standards of what is “bad functioning”: when something goes against a set notion of what the body should be like/do. Once again sysmeds (like certain other bigoted/exclusionist/identity-invalidating/-disbelieving groups) essentialize the “default” human body (or what they consider the default) at the expense of individual needs and desires and experiences. If the body/mind is working “wrongly,” but the individual is okay with it and not distressed by it, where’s the issue? Why is it an illness, why does it need to be “fixed”?

Consider that not everyone aligns with the expected default regarding what they want and feel in comparison to what their body/mind is doing. And that is okay.

Major strawman/edge case there: anti-sysmedicalists have never said that the distress we discuss is “distress from knowing you have DID (they’re probably thinking of people feeling despair/internalized stigma).” We acknowledge that you can be in distress from experiencing DID while unaware/in denial of it. Not what this is about. If you “have parts” but are not in distress, it is not DID.

If someone “experiences issues” with relationships/work, that means they are distressed by it. But distress has to be evaluated in isolation: is their distress caused by having alters itself, or the alters fighting/switching a lot but not having alters itself (as in, if the fighting & frequent switching were addressed there would no longer be any distress), or is it because they are forced to do relationships/work because of society/capitalism forcing them into distressing situations they would not experience if they had choice in a liberated world?

Unless they aren’t distressed, but still do relationships/work in a way normative society considers “wrong”/rulebreaking/inefficient/whatever, and go through that totally aware and fine with it, and although they are incapable of forcing themselves to conform they are totally fine with not conforming. In which, once again, the problem would be with external society alone, not the way their brain works itself.

Perhaps think for a damn second before you start saying “disorder is when you can’t be a good little capitalist stooge on the assembly line being as productive as your peers even if you don’t have a problem with that as long as your bosses do.” Perhaps consider where that rhetoric likely came from, and who would benefit from it.

(Note: I’m not saying situations 1 or 2 would not qualify as DID/disordered. But clarifications.)

Seems like sysmeds on average/mostly consider autism inherently a disorder. But why would my autism be a disorder, if in an accommodating and non-stigmatizing world I would not experience any distress from the fact that I have it, and all the distress I experience right now is allowed to be because of/caused by external factors? (Obviously every autistic person has different experiences. But also, obviously, nuance exists.)

I do have actual disorders and the experience is quite different, they’re mostly hell with a few occasional reprieves (though I’m kind of recovering and have been doing better these past few months) but yeah, I’m extremely pissed off at medicalists trying to equate the two experiences. I (personally) would greatly appreciate if I had the option to make them/their symptoms go away entirely, as they’re quite unpleasant. I think it's quite ridiculous that certain people would claim experiencing that is equivalent to merely experiencing abnormality/non-normativity/divergence/difference.

Going to (shamelessly) self-promote my essay here, I scribbled it down at 2am two months ago and have been too low on spoons to edit out any potentially undesirable bits but I’m too tired of explaining the same things over and over and it’s reasonably comprehensive.

This post is not about origins, it is about currently experienced effects. Do not complain about this post being pro-/anti-endo, I’m pro-endo but that’s not really relevant to this.

#OP #syscourse #disability justice #disability liberation #neurodiversity #neurodivergent liberation #antipsych #anti psych #psych critical #psychiatry critical #autimedicalism #neuromedicalism #anti sysmedicalism #pro nondisordered systems #disabled #actually neurodivergent

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clownstolemyjokesarchived · 2 years

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Okay so before I begin I should say that with these muses I write, I guess I have a tendency to pour a little bit of myself in each of them subconsciously especially if I happen to find aspects of them that I find within myself or had at one point in time (yeah we’re not touching Blitzo yet because he too falls under this category), so it’s safe to say that the more I’ve written Fizzarolli and the more I explored his dynamics, his thoughts, his personality and such-- The more and more I found pieces of myself in him and the more I began to integrate parts of me into him without meaning to which I suppose is both a bad thing but also good because it means when it comes to writing, he’s fairly easy for me to write for since a lot of his thoughts and emotions will maybe line up with my own (more or less anyways not all of them).

Either way, that being said... As I’ve continued to write him, I began to notice he started to exhibit some certain characteristics that were fairly similar to my own which made me wonder... Given his background, his past, his trauma and all that happened to him-- Does he have what I have too?

Now before anyone jumps at me, I’m only going based of my own observations having growing up, what I’ve been told by numerous doctors and therapists, my own diagnosis and so on and by no means am I saying he might actually have this or am I saying that what he has is a major defining point. I’m just saying it because it’ll explain why he is the way he is, why I write him the way he is and perhaps give a little (and maybe personal) insight to both him and myself.

I have Schizophrenia. This isn’t something I like to talk about a lot considering that in the past I’ve faced horrible stigma for it (people use to tell me very fucked up things and it made me very nervous and actually scared to talk about this since I didn’t want people to view me differently or see me as some sort of freak even though I’m not). There’s a lot of misconceptions when it comes to this disorder and more often than not, people automatically assume that people with this disorder are overly violently and crazy which isn’t always true. I’m the furthest from either of these things, but then again... I have been properly diagnosed and I’m taking proper medications for it as well as therapy. I can’t say for certain is this isn’t the case if left untreated since there have been cases where people have had this and gone off to do heinous acts. Regardless, not everyone is like that. Not everyone exhibits the same symptoms as well. Where one person can experiences delusions and hearing voices, another probably doesn’t.

I believe my Fizzarolli may have it as well considering as I’ve written him, he’s exhibited some traits that I’ve more or less have done both before I’ve been diagnosed and after. As for why I think this well here’s a few reasons:

Hallucinations. These usually involve seeing or hearing things that don't exist. Hallucinations can be in any of the senses, but hearing voices is the most common hallucination. It’s been faint but I have written before my Fizzarolli being plagued by nightmares and seeing shadows out of the corner of his eyes sometimes. He does in fact hear things but doesn’t give it too much attention, usually blaming it on the club + other things. It’s mostly when he’s alone or with Ozzie that if these happen, he grows a little more anxious considering that well... He’s the only one around minus Ozzie.

Extremely disorganized or abnormal motor behavior. This may show in a number of ways, from childlike silliness to unpredictable agitation. Behavior isn't focused on a goal, so it's hard to do tasks. Behavior can include resistance to instructions, inappropriate or bizarre posture, a complete lack of response, or useless and excessive movement. Now this one might be a little more tricky to pick since well he has cybernetic limbs, but even with that he does have trouble controlling them properly if he can’t focus and for these reasons. And also yes, he is very prone is getting aggressive rather easily to the point he takes his frustrations on his surroundings and leaves them a complete mess. Rarely will he take it out on someone else unless he feels they’ve deserved it like it’s someone that’s groping him or someone bothering someone he cares for. Things like that. Then, he’s back to his usual bouncy self like nothing happened. He has exhibited these other signs like resistance to instruction (both because he is a brat and because he just straight up didn’t feel like listening) and a complete lack of response.

Some other factors he exhibits:

Behavioral: social isolation (sometimes but rarely), disorganized behavior, aggression, agitation, compulsive behavior, excitability, hostility, repetitive movements, self-harm, or lack of restraint.

Cognitive: thought disorder, delusion, disorientation, mental confusion, slowness in activity.

Mood: anger, anxiety, apathy, feeling detached from self, loss of interest or pleasure in activities, elevated mood, or inappropriate emotional response.

Psychological: hallucination, paranoia, hearing voices, depression, fear.

Speech: circumstantial speech and rapid and frenzied speaking.

Again I’m just compiling things that makes me believe Fizzarolli has Schizophrenia and as I’ve said, it differs from person to person. I’ve mostly written down what he’s exhibited so far since writing him and what’s lead me to believe he might have it. Regardless of all this, this doesn’t really change anything per say since I’m going to keep writing him as I do but I thought I might give an insight as to how he acts and why he acts like he does? If that makes sense. He’s still himself but this gives an explanation more or less of how he thinks, why he thinks the way he does and perhaps better explain why he acts the way he does in certain circumstances. I probably wouldn’t have like said any of this if I didn’t have it myself and noticed the subtle ways he was thinking and acting and again, I feel a little bad having done that since that wasn’t my intention really but at the same-- It makes sense. This isn’t always passed by genetics you know. It can but not always. It can be caused by environment and altered brain chemistry and structure based on said environment which given all that he’s been through... Again, makes sense (to me).

I’m not saying this is the case or a major defining personality trait of his by any means. Please, just take this as insight in how he (and I in a lesser form) function and think and just... I don’t know, don’t hate it? But come to understand and accept it. I’m done rambling now. I’ve made myself nervous enough thank you.

#﹙ OOC ﹚ Oᴘᴏ sᴘᴇᴀᴋs #﹙ Hᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴ ﹚ Hᴇʏ ᴘᴜᴛ ᴏɴ ᴀ ʜᴀᴘᴘʏ ғᴀᴄᴇ #I'll come back and edit this later ;w;#I lowkey accidently made myself sick with nerves akega sorry

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