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juniperskye · 8 months

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I Almost Do Pt. 2

Sneak Peek: Part 2 to a Song Fic I wrote using “I Almost Do” by Taylor Swift. One in which the reader faces the internal battle of how to express her feelings and fears to the man that she loves. Will they end up together again?

Aaron Hotchner x Fem Reader

Angst/Fluff

Word count: 2563

Warnings: No use of y/n, age gap, mentions of anxiety, some language, mentions of food, mentions of pregnancy (kind of), mention of marriage, talk of past unhealthy relationship, talk of insecurities, let me know if I missed any!

Not edited - please be kind.

I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.

Part 1.

Aaron was ready to surrender all hope and go to bed when the three little dots appeared. He was anxious to see what you’d reply, but glad that you’d actually return his message this time around. He was quick to check his phone when it alerted him to a new message. A small smile broke out on his face when he read your reply…

You were shocked to see Aaron’s message to say the least. You had been hoping for this, practically begging for it last time you talked to Penelope, but now that it was happening, it was like your consciousness had left your body and was now looking down on you waiting for your brain to start firing off neurons and compute some sort of response to this man that you were hopelessly in love with. But you hesitated. Why did you hesitate? Why aren’t your fingers moving along the keys formulating a simple text telling Aaron that you too had been thinking of him and that you wanted nothing more than to be back in his arms.

That pit in your stomach. That sickly sinking feeling you get when you know you might be making the wrong choice, or when you are so nervous because you don’t know the outcome of the situation that hasn’t occurred yet. But you can’t know the outcome if you don’t take the leap. But…the nerves, the anxiety, that sickly sinking pit in your stomach…they nag at you, whispering “make the safe choice”, “make the choice in which we already know the outcome”, “don’t take unnecessary risks”.

You shake your head; you can’t let fear keep you from the possibility of happiness. You can’t let these nerves, this anxiety, that sickly sinking pit in your stomach run your life. Not anymore. So, you won’t. For once you are going to let your heart decide.

Your fingers move to type out a reply, the nerves, anxiety, and that stupid pit in your stomach SCREAMING at you to turn back, delete the text, lock your phone and go to bed. You reread the text over and over again, questioning every individual character neatly placed within the confines of the grey tones plastered amongst the text screen, this is it. Send.

You: There is so much I want to say, but I am not entirely sure a text is the best way to express everything I am feeling right now. You have been on my mind nonstop lately and I miss you. And…that scares me.

Aaron couldn’t help but smile. This was one of the many things he loved about you, you tended to overthink and that led to rambling and nerves and fidgeting. Watching you in those moments was beautiful because you allowed him to see a vulnerable piece of you and it was warm and intimate, and it was you. He could practically feel your racing heart and shaking hands through his phone. He knew what it meant for you to share that you were scared, it was something that had been brought up early on in your relationship.

**Aaron would notice that after sustaining an injury while on a case, you tended to shut down for a short while (usually until there were obvious signs of healing) and when he confronted you about it, you had broken down. Everything about your relationship with Aaron had terrified you. He had come into your life with the force of a battering ram, you had been swept off the hinges, your once secure defenses all came crumbling down. You wept, hot salty tears paving tracks down your cheeks, hiccupping out apologies.

A flash of panic had crossed Aaron’s features, quickly melting into concern and gentle shushing. Him telling you that there was no need for apologies. He simply wanted to know what had you in such a state. He held you until you had calmed, and you finally explained to him that you would shut him out because that was easier than admitting that you loved him so much that it physically hurt. When he came home with cuts, bruises, gunshot wounds, stab wounds, hell, after nearly being blown up, you felt this wave of nausea along with earth shattering pain that one of these times it wouldn’t be him calling you to inform you he was on his way, but a call from Dave or Derek or maybe even Penelope to let you know that he was gone forever. That he would never look at you with those beautiful whiskey eyes. He’d never pull you closer and nuzzle his nose into the nape of your neck in the early hours of the morning. He’d never kiss your knuckles or call you sweetheart ever again, and you couldn’t live with that.

You told Aaron that you had never felt this way before, that you had come to learn that your soul was not your own, but it belonged to him. The two of you were written in the stars and you had figured it out the moment you met him. Aaron hugged you then, reassuring you that he was okay, and things would work out. For a moment you believed him, and things were okay…until they weren’t.**

Aaron wanted so badly to call you up, tell you to come over…but he knew that it wouldn’t be that easy. Things between you had been left shattered, fragile shards of glass so thin that you can’t pick up the pieces without making a bigger mess of things. He knew he needed to tread lightly, careful not to put too much pressure on you and make sure you knew he would move at whatever pace you were comfortable with.

Aaron: How would you like to meet up for lunch? We can talk about things, see where that leads? You: Yeah, ok. Lunch sounds good. Aaron: Are you free tomorrow? I have a mandatory day off.

You scoffed at his message. Aaron despised mandatory days off, he always made sure to bring case files home so he could review and revise them on these days. He had said it felt like a waste of time, that there was no point in sitting around and doing nothing all day while I was out at work. Your thoughts were interrupted by the alert of another message coming in.

Aaron: I don’t know why I even suggested it, I know you work on Fridays. I can schedule a day off for this weekend. You: Tomorrow works for me. I actually got a promotion, so my schedule is different now. We can catch up on that later though. Is 12:30 alright?

Aaron felt a pang in his chest. He hadn’t known that you’d been up for a promotion at work, and he wonders when that even happened. Had it been back when he was letting his work consume his entire life? Had he completely zoned out during a conversation in which you would’ve excitedly told him about this new position and all the doors it could open for you in your career? Or had this been a change you’d felt you needed post breakup to keep your mind occupied? He would find out, and he would make up for it either way because damnit this ache he is feeling right now is horrible and he doesn’t think he could handle feeling this way forever.

Aaron: Oh, congratulations! 12:30 is great. Maggie’s? You: Thanks. Maggie’s sounds good. See you tomorrow.

You internally cursed Aaron for choosing Maggie’s. That had been your place, he had intentionally picked it because of your shared history there, you were sure of it. Maggie’s was where you had your first official date, it is where he said he loved you for the first time, Maggie’s was the home of many conversations of the future you two thought you’d share.

You thought about texting Aaron back telling him that you’d rather go to that new café on Grand. Somewhere neutral to your relationship but you ultimately decided against it. You figured it was time to go to bed, heading to the bathroom to brush your teeth when your phone went off again.

Aaron: See you tomorrow.

Aaron had hoped that his choosing of Maggie’s would put you at ease, somewhere familiar and comfortable. He was anxious to see you, worried that he wouldn’t be able to keep himself from pulling you in to him the second he saw you. After you had left that night, he had realized that you had brought so much into his life, you brought this warmth and radiated this vibrancy that he had grown accustomed to, so when you ended things his life went back to the cold, dull mundane that it had previously been. He hoped tomorrow would be good, that things would take a turn for the better.

Aaron: Goodnight You: Goodnight Aaron.

You were shocked that you slept through the night. You wondered if that was a sign that today was going to be a good day. That you would meet up with Aaron and things would go exactly as they are meant to. The universe has a plan…right? You needed to get ready for this lunch. Taking a deep breath and a quick stretch, you mentally prepare yourself. It’s just Aaron, he knows you better than anyone, things would be okay.

You took some time getting ready. Wanting to be in a positive head space you figured some self-care would be a great place to start. You took a shower, styled your hair, put on some light makeup and got dressed. You had debated wearing something that you knew would get a reaction out of Aaron but decided against it. Opting for something comfortable, you threw on your favorite pair of jeans and a thick knit sweater. You paired this outfit with your favorite jewelry and some loafers. Checking the time, you grabbed your purse and keys and made your way out the door. The ride to Maggie’s was all too familiar, muscle memory taking you there, allowing you to get lost in your thoughts.

Nerves, anxiety and that sickly sinking pit in your stomach, you anticipated their arrival. Only, they didn’t come. When you arrived at Maggie’s, you parked and made your way to the door. They still hadn’t made themselves present. Part of you wondered if it was because your body was waiting to hit you with all of those feelings in the form of Aaron standing you up, but that thought slipped your mind the moment you saw him stand and wave you over.

You walked over to him, his body twitched in such a way that you knew he wanted to hug you but also knew it wouldn’t be appropriate. Not now anyway. He gestured for you to sit, and you did. He looked so good. Tired, maybe even a little sad, but still so damn good. You looked to each other to begin what was to be an awkward dance of small talk until one of you opened the flood gates of the conversation that would determine the outcome of all this.

“We have known each other far too long to indulge in small talk. I think it is best if we just lay it all out on the table.” Aaron began.

“Agreed. But we should probably order first, I am starving, and I would hate to entangle our server in this discussion.”

“Good idea.” Aaron agreed and flagged the waitress down.

You placed your orders and ended up making some small talk waiting for the food to come. When it did arrive, Aaron politely asked our server that we be left alone for a while. He did it in that charming way that he does, he has always had a way with words, and with people.

“I think I should start. I made a lot of mistakes and some of which were selfish, and they hurt you in ways that I will never be able to make up for. But I need you to know that I am so sorry for shutting down and not communicating with you. I don’t want to make excuses, God knows nothing can excuse my actions, but I do want to explain that I let immature teasing from Dave and Derek get the better of me. It struck some insecurities within myself that I thought I had overcome but seemingly hadn’t.” Aaron shook his head at himself.

“Wait a minute, what teasing? What insecurities? Why are you just now telling me all of this?”

“Derek had asked me about our future, if we would get married, and if you would want children. I told him I wasn’t sure but that you and I would work through that together as it came up in our relationship. That is when Dave chimed in and kindly reminded me that I am quite a bit older than you and if we did have children, well, at their graduations you would look like their mother, and I would look more like their grandfather. Sweetheart I know that we had talked about the age difference, and you’ve made it very clear that it doesn’t change your feelings for me, but I can’t help but wonder if I am holding you back from a life that you deserve.” Aaron’s eyes grew misty.

“Aaron, I know that we haven’t talked about all that, but I think that was kind of the biggest fault in our relationship. We took things day by day, and while that can be a beautiful and exciting thing, it doesn’t allow for growth since you don’t know what you are aiming for. I would love to get married and have children, and have a beautiful life with you, but the truth is, we don’t know what the future holds. We can’t be certain that we would even be able to conceive, or that we will be together forever. But if I have learned one thing over these last few months, it is that I get to choose to take the leap. So, there is something I am certain of, and that is my love for you. It hasn’t changed, but I need you to open up to me as I have for you. I need you to communicate with me Aaron and I need you to be all in. What do you say?”

Aaron looked to you with bright eyes, hope shining through. In his eyes you could see forever, you just needed him to jump in. You were shocked at how bold you had been, but it was as if a fog had cleared the moment you stepped foot into Maggie’s. You heart and head in perfect sync telling you, this is it. You were meant to take this risk and be happy.

It was up to Aaron. Would he be willing to push aside his insecurities and jump into this once and for all? Could the fact that the two of you had the last five months to grow and mature and reflect on your wrongdoings be enough to thrust your forward into a healthy successful relationship? Would any of that even matter? Would Aaron leap? You sat with bated breath awaiting his reply, silently willing him to say something, grab you and just kiss you, something! But then he spoke…

“I’m all in sweetheart.”

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freensrcha · 1 year

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GIF MAKING IN PS

i've never done anything like this before so hope it makes some kind of sense.

so before you get into making gifs first thing so will need is some sort of editing software (i use ps 2022) and some raws obviously. most of the shows i gif are on yt so its pretty easy to get them and you can use any kind of yt to mp4 converter.

so once you have all of this i guess we can get started!!! on a daily basis i do not follow all these steps because you can easily turn them into actions on ps, which means that it would take just seconds. so although it may look lengthy its pretty simple

the first step to making gifs is importing the raws. you first want to go to file>import>video frames to layer. this will open up your file explorer from where you can choose your desired file. you may want to make sure your file isn't an mkv one but an mp4 before you do this. also if your raws are large, perhaps a whole episode or longer than 30 minutes, it might help to trim it down beforehand to make it easier to work with.

once you select your file, this window will open up. here, you can move the sliders to select the exact part of the clip you want for your gifs. (when files are larger, it would be more difficult to capture smaller parts of the clip using the sliders) although optional, selecting the limit to every 'x' frames will help reduce the size of your gifs while not making it look too choppy. i do 'every 2 frames' for regular scenes and leave it unchecked for anything in slow-mo. more than 2 usually makes the entire thing look sped up and choppy so i wouldn't recommend it. although it depends on the raws ideally you want something around 80 frames for one gif.

once you press okay on the above step, your workspace will open up and from here we can start making the gif. the first step would be to set the time delay. this is two ensure that the gif doesn't look sped up. for this you want to first select all the frames as shown above.

next, you can click on the downward arrow on any frame to change the time delay. i usually prefer 0.07s which you can set in other...

once you've set the time delay, you have to convert the frames into timeline as shown above.

now that you have your timeline as seen on the left side, all you have to do is convert everything into a smart object. for that you have to first select all the layers using the shortcut Ctrl+Alt+A and then right-click on the layers followed by convert to smart object

now you can see that the many layers have been converted into one layer making it easier to work with. the next step is to resize the gif. the original dimensions would make the gifs too large to fit tumblr's size limit, this can be done by going to image>canvas size

to ensure that tumblr does unnecessarily crop your gifs you want to make sure width is always 540px if there's going to be only one gif in a row. the height can be anything depending how you want your gif to look.

you can adjust the gif onto the new canvas using Ctrl+T to transform the layer. always ensure the height and width are linked to make sure you don't squeeze the image weirdly.

after resizing the gif, i next sharpen the gif (which is my least favourite part). you can sharpen by going to filter>sharpen>smart sharpen while the noise filter is in filter>noise>add noise

although i don't always stick to the same sharpening, these are the settings i use the most.

once i'm done with the sharpening i like to soften the first smart sharpen filter. for this i change the blending option of the first filter to 80%. this is entirely optional.

once sharpening is done, you can colour and edit however you like using any of the adjustment layers. i mostly prefer curves and selective colour. these are the curves i used for this particular gif to remove the purple/redness it had going on. in RGB mode the white slider adds brightness and the grey one darkness/contrast. then you can individually use the red, green and blue modes to adjust the colours. i only used selective colour here to adjust the skin tones a bit so i haven't added that.

once done with colouring all you have to do is export the gif from file>export>save for web (legacy)

in the last window you have to make sure your looping is forever and that your gif is below 9.5MB. although tumblr says max gif size is 10MB, at least for me nothing over 9.5MB uploads.

and THAT'S IT (i say after a whole one page essay) your gif is ready!!! honestly i don't know if this is the easiest or most convenient method but this is just how i do it. also i use actions for everything other than colouring so it isn't as time consuming as it looks. you can also set shortcuts for importing and exporting to save time. this can be done from edit>keyboard shortcuts

since you made it to the end here is an extra bit on captioning

you want to start with a normal text layer and center it at the bottom of the gif. i use arial bold italic in size 16. next to make it look better we can add an outline and shadow to it through the layer style. and you can open up this window either by clicking the fx option at the bottom right or double-clicking the text layer.

these are the settings i use for the stroke as well as the shadow

now it is ACTUALLY the end!!!

#gif making #ps tutorial #gif making tutorial #photoshop tutorial #hope this makes some sense 😭#i made the important stuff bold so that you don't have to necessarily read through the whole thing #i had to go take a look at my actions cause i had actually forgotten my settings in the first place

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spilledkauffie · 3 years

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Game Night

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader Word Count: 2.2k T/W: fluff A/N: Part 2 of Bingo — a few months later

I am SO SORRY this took me way longer to post than it should have!

Bucky Tag List: @anreeixcobra ❤︎ @tsnelf7 ❤︎ @fandom-princess-forevermore

It was Friday night, which meant one thing: Game Night. Ever since Yori introduced you at Bingo, you made it a tradition in your relationship to play board games on Fridays. For the most part you kept it to fairly modern games, but tonight was going to be a surprise.

Tonight it was your place, 8 o’clock. Bucky showed up with a six pack of root-beer in glass bottles. You added a few to the fridge as he found his usual seat at your apartment table. He waited for you to round the small apartment’s bar and join him. Sliding the glass bottles across the table to Bucky, you smiled, biting in your bottom lip, as he slid your bottle back, now without its top.

Easily he popped the top off his own bottle with his left hand; it was as he was about to take a sip that he caught sight of your look, “what?” he furrowed his eyebrows, questionably.

“So. . . tonight,” you tried not to giggle.

“What?” Bucky asked again, this time finding himself following your smile despite his will not to.

“Tonight is going to be special,” you clasped your hands together, “because I found some stuff that’s as old as you.”

“Wow, thanks,” Bucky said sarcastically, taking a sip, shaking his head, blinking softly as he saw you rush to convince him it would be fun. Sighing deeply, he gave in, “alright, what is it?”

“I’ll be right back,” you twirled on your heel and left the room.

Returning to shaking his head and the glass bottle, he paused after settling the bottle on the table. It’d been a long time since anyone cared about anything actually as old as him. He’d been pretty good at keeping up with the times, a lot of things he knew just got an upgrade, but the thought of something from his actual childhood felt a little heartwarming.

“Okay,” you declared, reentering the room with a stack of vintage boxes in your arms that made Bucky lean back in his chair out of shock, “here we are.”

His jaw dropped a little at what you had brought out as you set the stack on the table. Watching you take a deep breath and exhale with a smirk, he shook his head, this time silently asking “how?” You set your hands atop the stack, rapping your fingers across the top box as you smiled again.

Smoothing your hands out across the box top, you cleared your throat, “no peeking,” bringing Bucky’s attention entirely to you.

“Option number one,” you held up the rectangular shape with severely faded letters across it, “Scrabble, released 1938.” The box very gently met the table, “option number two,” you looked at him attempting not to giggle as you saw him cross his arms over his chest, genuinely listening to you intently, “Sorry! released 1934, Battleship, original pen and paper game,” you clarified, he lifted his eyebrows, impressed, “and last but not least, Monopoly, released 1935.”

“Wow, you uh- you really did your research,” he commented, looking over the stack of authentically vintage boxes.

“Of course,” you shrugged with a smile, “my boyfriend’s 106, if I want to bring back some childhood nostalgia, that requires some research. . . and late hour ebay bidding in our case.”

He nodded, a faint smile showing, before it faded with his next words, “I hope you didn’t do too much research on me,” he looked up, hand resting on Monopoly.

You calmly slid down into the seat across from him and stared with a kind smile still on your lips, reaching to touch his hand, you stroked your thumb against his knuckles, “I’m more of a first hand account, direct source, kind of girl when it comes to people,” the corner of his mouth tugged into a smile.

You knew, just not everything, and he wasn’t sure he was prepared to have another living soul know it all quite yet. Luckily, you were someone who seemed to actually understand that.

“Or,” you announced, lifting a pointer finger, as if requesting a pause whilst you went to a nearby drawer, returning with a much smaller box, “we can get really really old school, even for you” the box met the table top, “standard 52 card deck, English edition, circa 1516. . .obviously not original.”

Bucky chuckled, looking to you, tonguing his cheek, before picking up the cards, “I hate to tell you, but that’s just a little before my time,” he squinted at you, teasingly.

Biting your lip, your shoulders shifted with the giggle that came after his comment, “so, come on,” you sat back down, this time with your elbows on the table and hands laced, to support your resting chin on top of them, “what should I beat your butt in?”

“Oh,” Bucky, attempting to appear insulted, began raising his eyebrows, “you think?”

“Yeah,” you laughed your words while looking at his serious face, “I think, better yet, I know.”

“Well, I don’t know where you get your confidence from. You know you are talking to a local senior Bingo night champion,” he shrugged with a head tilt, as if that was supposed to be a big deal.

“Woooow,” you drew out, smiling uncontrollably.

“But,” he sighed, “okay,” he shook his head once, accepting your challenge, “let’s go, you’re on! Monopoly,” he brought the box towards himself as you set the others on the floor next to your chair.

You watched as he picked up the little metal pieces, examining each one individually. There was an expression you’d never seen before, he was remembering something positive from his past. A memory that sparked a smile that you helped bring about. He surveyed the board, with all its bright colours and familiar street names.

“It’s been-” he paused, looking upward, doing the math in his head, “it’s been 85 years since I played this game,” setting each piece he stopped at the boat, laughing to himself, “you know, Steve used to always be the battleship.”

A soft smile came across your lips, while you watched him remember exactly how to set it up. You picked the Scottie dog and he picked the vintage race car piece.

“Were you always the race car?” you ventured, wanting to know more about his childhood, you knew he didn’t talk about it often.

“Oh,” he glanced to the piece he had just naturally picked up without a thought, “yeah, well, I think,” he gave a quick, but somber smile, before clearing his throat, and actually looking up, “and my sister, whenever she’d actually manage to get mom and dad to let her stay up with us, she’d always be the thimble,” he leaned back in his chair, smiling, “whenever it was her turn to move she’d put it on her finger and hop it down the street names.” He leaned back to the table, “we never made her go to jail, even if she landed on it, Steve would make up some rule that let her skip it.”

“That’s really sweet of you guys,” you said, looking softly at his smile.

“Yeah,” he swallowed, “but don’t think you can skip jail,” he changed his tone, preferring not to dwell on the past even if it was positive.

“Don’t think I’ll be visiting,” you smirk confidently, “better watch out for the money man yourself.”

“Wow, who is this?” he dropped his jaw, “she’s so sarcastic, does Yori know this side of you? Do you sneak jellybeans under the table or something evil like that?”

Laughing, you took your root-beer, “just give me my $1,500 so the smack down can actually begin.”

Two hours later, after a long battle between Boardwalk, control over the railroads, and many, many visits to jail, you sat back, lips quirked, arms across your chest as your little Scottie sat in jail.

“And three thousand, six hundred, and five. . . I’m sorry, but that leaves you,” Bucky set his elbows on the table, wincing at you, “bankrupt.”

“Fine,” you huffed jokingly, giving your best pout,“you win.”

“Aww, c’mon,” Bucky reached out a hand to touch your forearm comfortingly, accompanied by a smile you couldn’t deny.

“You wanna go again?” You offered seriously, resting your hand on top of his tenderly, happy to see him so happy.

“It was really fun, but let’s play something else, this time you pick,” he offered.

Breaking into a smile, you gave a nod, and he asked what you had in mind. It took a moment, you wanted to make this good, and you wanted to see it be a little more of a struggle for him, if you were honest.

“You know, I know it’s later than your. . .original timeline, but there’s this fantastic game called Twister,” you smirked, perking an eyebrow to ask if he was up for it.

“Twister?” He repeated you, tilting his head like a confused puppy, “what’s Twister?”

“I’ll show you, but,” you glanced over to your small apartment living room, “we might need to arrange the furniture a little.”

“Don’t worry,” Bucky stood, “I can handle that.”

Smiling, you stand, “okay, just push it all to one side, I’ll get the game.”

Ten minutes later, shoeless, you both stood looking over the polka dotted sheet on the floor. Nodding happily to yourself, Bucky shook his head almost in fear.

“Make sense?” You asked, having just explained the very simple rules, you turned to face him.

“Oh, I’m sorry I asked,” he sighed, shouldering off his jacket and tossing it onto the couch along with his glove, “yeah, it makes sense,” he set his hands on his hips, pondering this new game intently.

“Okay, you first,” you held up the spinning arrow, and began.

One hand and foot at a time, sometimes struggling to reach the spinner, but you both made it work pretty well. Having kept to one side of the sheet, it came time to get a smidge more twisted.

Bucky managed to keep balanced and spin a green dot with his left arm, conveniently it placed him right over you. As he began to reach for green, he carefully calculated how best to approach the green dot in order to keep his balance. It was a pretty far reach and he’d need to balance himself whilst reaching over you.

“What’s the matter old man, can’t quite move like you used to?” you shamelessly giggled.

Raising his eyebrows at your tone, “ohhh, wow,” Bucky said sincerely, finally placing his left arm over you and to a green dot, now above you he tilted his head sassily, “respect your elders.”

His last sentence only made your giggle turn into a genuine laugh. You closed your eyes and threw your head back a little. Admittedly, Bucky thought it was funny too, but he didn’t laugh, he just took in your smile and the sound of your laugh, enjoying every single moment of it.

When you brought your head back up, you were about to respond sassily, but instead you found his lips meeting yours. With a small squeak of surprise, you relaxed into the kiss, glad that he was finally confident enough with you to take a chance now and then. He tasted like vanilla root beer, which mixed wonderfully with the scent of his cologne you were finally close enough to smell.

It was soft and slow at first, but slowly, with his right hand palming the arch of your back, you eased into his touch, lower back almost meeting the floor as you both sunk down a little. You completely forgot about the game, as you reached your arms around his neck gently. Keeping the kiss close, you felt him hesitate to deepen it, so you gave him a small sign of encouragement, by moving your hand to the side of his neck, naturally bringing him even closer.

You had no idea how long you’d been there, on that polka dot sheet, but it was such bliss that you didn’t even care. Smiling into the kiss, you felt him smile back.

Parting, he pressed his forehead to yours, “I win,” he whispered, lips in a smile.

“What?” was all you could ask, still mesmerised by the kiss.

Bucky motioned his head to his left arm which happened to have been keeping the two of you steady. . . all the while remaining on the green dot. You dropped your arms from around his neck, to the floor, elbows supporting you as you looked up at him, shaking your head.

“That does not count, Bucky,” you tried not to smile as he kept his arm as still as possible.

“What? But my hand’s still on green,” he dramatically gestured to it, making you bite your lip to repress a giggle, trying to match his seriousness.

Shoving his chest directly above you, he feigned an ‘ow!’ before you softly pull him closer again.

“If I kiss you are you gonna hit me again?”

You smirk, “I might if you don’t.”

Bucky smiled, lips almost touching yours, “alright, sorry,” he smiled, voice almost a whisper as his lips brushed against yours, “I’m still learning the rules to this game.”

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something-fanfiction-ie · 4 years

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24 Hours

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Warnings: You get buried alive and uhm... I think a curse word or two?

A/N: So, before you notice, yes this is largely based on season two episode nine of Bones, Aliens in the Spaceship. Also, yes this is a criminal minds imagine and yes I’ve hopelessly and irrevocably fallen in love with Matthew Gray Gubler. Please like, comment, reblog, and send me asks, I love that shit. Also, if you’ve never seen criminal minds, you should watch it. Even if only for Dr. Spencer Reid aka Matthew Gray Gubler. You’re welcome in advance.

___

“Hey Spenny, I’m going out to get some coffee. Do you want anything?” Your voice echoed around in Spencer’s head, the image of you waving at him from the door as you walked away imprinted into his mind. Would it be the last time he would ever see you?

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N) has been buried alive,” Hotchner stood in the front of the room with Spencer’s phone on speaker. The whole team sat around the table with varying degrees of horror displayed on their faces as the realization dawned on them, “Wire transfer five million dollars to the following Grand Cayman account.” Spencer buried his head in his hands, his fingers tangling into his hair.

Your eyes were on him as you waved over your shoulder, stepping through the door with just a glance and a smile. He kept playing it through his mind in slow motion. Now you were underground, running out of air and running out of time.

“Upon receipt of the wire transfer, I will provide you with Agent (Y/L/N)’s GPS coordinates. You have 24 hours. This will be my last communication.” The BAU jumped into action, people pulling the files from the previous abductions and swapping theories.

“Where in the hell are we going to get five million dollars? The FBI has a strict policy about not paying ransoms.” Morgan slammed a fist on the table, gritting his teeth as his mind raced.

“Her parents.” Spencer looked up, pulling himself out of his head. He needed to be actively helping. They had twenty four hours and sitting at the table with his head in his hands wouldn’t help anything.

Pushing away from the table, the young doctor stood up to look at Agent Hotchner.

“When her parents died they left everything to her. She’s never touched it, said it felt too much like blood money.” Hotchner nodded, looking across the room to Garcia who looked as shell shocked as Spencer felt. Not only had her dear friend been abducted and buried alive, but she had been telling secrets about her parents to Reid and not her?!

“Garcia I need you to find out who she banks with, JJ get them on the phone and see what you can do. If we can pay the ransom we will. If not, we’ll have to figure where she is.” Both women nodded, rushing back to Garcia’s office. The remaining agents started to map the location of every burial site.

“Well, at least we know she’s in Virginia.”

...

When you woke up, rolling into the leather backseat in you car, your brain felt like it was exploding. Your entire body ached, and for a minute, too focused on the pain, you didn’t realize where you were.

It hurt to sit up, to breathe, to look around, and when your brain connected every dot it hurt to think.

“I’ve been buried alive.” You said it aloud, staring at the rocks and dirt that pressed against every window. Thinking felt like walking through sludge, but why?

You’d been working on a case. Four victims in four months, all buried alive, all coming from wealthy backgrounds. Every victim varied in age, race, and sex. It appeared you were number five. There would be a call, maybe two hours after you’d been buried. It would be the only means of communication, there would be a high ransom.

None of this information could help you though. You were underground, what is around you, (Y/N)?

In your glove compartment was a small digital camera, a pen, and some napkins. In your center console was a bottle of water, a small tube of sunscreen, and some loose change. Your phone was on the floor but the battery had been taken out, and sitting in the backseat was a box with a book delicately placed inside.

A first edition copy of Sonnets from the Portuguese, the pages yellowed with age. To just anyone, it was an old book with some poems inside, but you knew that Spencer would understand the moment he opened the box. Elizabeth Barrett Browning had written the series of sonnets to her husband as they were courting. Inside was a poem you had confessed to Spencer was your absolute favorite.

“I’m kind of a cliche hopeless romantic,” you laughed, afraid to look at him for the fear that he would think you were just a silly girl. “But my favorite poem is How Do I Love Thee?”

“By Elizabeth Barrett Browning?” When you looked at him, his expression hadn’t changed from that of a simple curiosity. You relaxed a little, glad to reveal the intimate detail about yourself without backlash.

You had spent such a long time trying to bury the persona of a teenage hopeless romantic underneath the facade that you were only concerned for logic, knowledge, and psychology. You’d never understood why wanting to love and be loved made you any less intelligent.

“I’ve dedicated that poem to the man I hope to marry one day.” A small smile twitched at the edges of his lips as you looked down at your nails, picking at the dirt underneath them. Your face felt like it was on fire. Why had you told him that?

In an uncharacteristic display of affection, Spencer reached across the divide between your desks and put his hand over yours. He squeezed, his expression gentle when you met his gaze.

“He will be a lucky man.”

Tears pricked at the back of your eyes at the thought of Spencer. Would you ever see him again? Would you even be alive in twenty-four hours?

Panic seemed to take control, propelling forward. You screamed, crying hysterically as you pounded against the windows.

“Help me! I’m in here! Please!” You didn’t stop until your hands were bruised, not caring about the amount of oxygen it had taken from your already limited supply. After the panic came a numbness that spread through your body and mind. You weren’t sure how long you stayed staring into your hands, sitting cross-legged in the front seat, but when you finally came back to yourself you knew you had to truly fight.

Gathering everything you’d found in your car, you started to think of what you could do. A camera, a phone, a pen, a napkin, some change, a book, sunscreen, a bottle of water.

Think, (Y/N), think. What is around you?

“Dirt.” Then you gasped, scrambling back to the front of the car. Using the window crank, you let bits of the dirt fall inside before rolling the window back up and grabbing a handful.

Just by looking you could tell there was ash, a couple of sniffs told you there was nitrogen and sulfur. You spit into the dirt. Coal rich soil. But that was all of Virginia, that didn’t tell you anything.

Think, (Y/N), think.

A camera, a phone, a pen, a napkin, some change, a book, sunscreen, a bottle of water. A camera, a phone, a pen, a napkin, some change, a book, sunscreen, a bottle of water.

“That’s it!” Carefully, you shifted the dirt to the top of the center console. Mixing a dab of sunscreen into the dirt, you powered on the camera and grabbed the pen which, conveniently, had a laser on the end.

Just like that you knew where you were. You just had to find a way to tell the others.

...

“We can’t get the money from the bank, she has it completely closed off from anyone touching any of that money. They won’t even tell us how much she has.” JJ ran her fingers through her hair, turned in her chair to face the team that had gathered into Garcia’s office.

“It was a long shot anyways, you typically have to have your name on the bank account to be able to withdraw any money.” Hotchner looks to the rest of the agents clustered next to him, hoping that one of them would have something.

“Did we get anything from the geographic profile?” He made direct eye contact with Reid, watching as he stepped forward and nodded for Garcia to pull up a map. Red lines popped up at each of the four crime scenes, connecting to the location the victim lived. Salem to Lovingston. Stuart to Winchester. Boydton to Marion. Louisa to Yorktown.

“Each of the burial sites is two to four hours away from where the victims lived which would put (Y/N) in this general vicinity.” Using his finger, Reid circles an area on the map around Quantico. No one mentions the shaking of his hand.

“There’s nothing else to narrow down the search.” His voice cracks at the end and no one can meet his eyes. JJ flinches at the sound, tightening her hand around the edge of the desk. It isn’t until Hotch goes to send the team back to work that a chime breaks the silence in the room.

Reid scrambles for his phone, fishing it out of his pocket and flipping it open.

“Who is it from? The Gravedigger? What did he say?” Everyone crowds around him, trying to get a peak at the message.

“It’s from (Y/N).”

6 7 16 M1.4

“What the hell does that mean?” Penelope says.

...

You’re not sure how long its been, but you can feel the oxygen getting low. Your eyes feel heavy, like you’re tired, and if you move just a little too fast the world shifts and sways like you’re on a boat.

After hot wiring the phone to the car, you’d leaned against the horn and typed the shortest message you could as fast as possible. When the phone sparked and died, you weren’t even sure if the messsge had gone through. You could only hope.

For now, you’ve crawled into the back, opening the book to read through it. If you’re going to die, at least you can read your favorite poems one more time. With every sonnet comes a memory of Spencer.

“Actually,” Spencer begins, stepping forward to point out something no one had even thought of, gesturing between pictures and referencing something only he could see in his mind. You’d worked a couple of cases with the team at this point, getting to know each individual who sat at this table with you.

Spencer turned back to the group and there it was, for just a fraction of a second he looked at all the older people at the table like a little boy looking for acceptance and recognition. Looking for approval. Your heart flipped over itself and your crossed your arms, hoping this wasn’t the start of a silly crush.

You flip to the next sonnet, reading it in a whisper as another memory hits you.

“I’m scared, Spencer.” You met his eyes, heart hammering in your chest as JJ strapped a mic to your bra strap. You were going undercover in an attempt to lure out the unsub, and although you knew every single one of your team members would be ready to have your back at a moments notice, you couldn’t shake the fear.

“Why?” It wasn’t harsh the way he said it, looking at you from the desk he was sitting on as JJ stepped away and out of the room to give the two of you some privacy. You started to button up your shirt, trying to breathe away the shaking of your hands.

“I’m afraid something is going to go wrong. That I’ll say or do something that will tip him off and he’ll kill me.” Spencer stepped forward, not touching you but looking into your eyes as you smoothed your hands down your sides.

“I’ll be there before he has the chance. I’ll take that shot. But I don’t believe I’ll have to do that because I know you have the ability to do this without a hitch. You’ve got this.” He raised his eyebrows, waiting for you to be okay. He wouldn’t let them send you in if you didn’t give him the okay. You could see that in the way he positioned himself between you and the door, ready to take the brunt of any frustration in order for you to feel safe.

“Okay. I trust you.”

And you did trust him. That’s why you were saving your last trick, waiting for him to put together the last of the puzzle piece he needed in order to save you. Spencer was going to find you, you had no doubt.

You just weren’t sure if you would survive the trick or not.

...

“Six, seven, sixteen, M, one point four.” Spencer stood staring at the board where they had copied the text, going over every possible meaning he could think of.

A book? No.

A math problem? No.

Coordinates? No.

Theories were being thrown across the room at rapid fire, everyone trying to think of the meaning to the cryptic message. They were all still huddled into Garcia’s office, so the voices echoed and bounced around the room.

“She’s been down there for fourteen hours, we’ve got nothing! She’s already running out of oxygen, I’m honestly starting to doubt it means anything.” Derek passed a hand over his face, patting at his cheeks as his eyes grew heavy.

“No. She’s highly intelligent and extremely resourceful, the message means something but wh-” Reid froze. In his mind he could see the periodic table.

“What is it, Reid?” Gideon looked at him, watching as his brain started to fly.

“Garcia pull up a map of Virginia.” She did as she was told, pulling up the map with one point in Quantico.

“Six on the periodic table is carbon, seven is nitrogen, sulfur is sixteen. She’s telling us the dirt she’s in.” Quick to catch on, Garcia zoomed the map onto coal rich soil in Virginia. It wasn’t enough.

“Coal can’t be distinguished by mineral composition, it’s all the same. However, macerals are unique in that they flouresce at different levels. In this case, 1.4, which is rare. It only occurs when there are high concentrations of inertinite.” The map zoomed, Penelope’s fingers flying across the keys as Spencer spoke.

“Got her.”

...

Settling your napkin letter atop the book, you nestled the lid to the gift box back on top. You tied the bow tight before tucking the whole thing into the waistband of your jeans. There was no guarantee it would make it, there was no guarantee you would make it, but you had waited long enough.

Grabbing both ends of the wires you’d stripped, you climbed into the back, hands shaking at the thought of what you were about to do.

“I’m scared.” You said. You heard Spencer, saw him leaning against a window seal in your mind. He looked at you from behind those glasses that always reminded you of a 60’s NASA engineer. His hair was pushed back, the ends curling around his ears in a way that made you itch to loop them around a finger.

Why?

“What if I never see you again?” Tears you hadn’t even known were in your eyes spilled over onto your cheeks, dripping onto the thighs of your pants. He changed now, taking on various Spencer’s from your past.

Spencer looking up from paperwork to listen to a question, eyebrows raised and eyes wide. His lips parted ever so slightly while a piece of his hair dangled out of place on his forehead.

Spencer leaned against the bar, waving down the bartender mid laugh. His tie is loose and his shirt is untucked, his hair is adorably disheveled and his eyes are crinkled around the edges.

Spencer asleep on the jet home, his cheek cradled in one hand, his elbow propped on the armrest. His long legs are stretched out, his other hand splayed on top of his chest which rose and fell with each breath.

Spencer standing in the elevator, the surprise of someone calling his name turning into a small smile when he recognizes you racing to the doors. He reaches out to press a button before using both hands to grab onto the strap of his bag. He looks down at you as you enter with a look in his eyes you’ve never been able to identify.

And the Spencer you’ve only ever dreamed about.

His eyes fluttering open after a long night spent proving his love, the sun filtering through the window and reflecting on him in such a way that it makes you wish you could paint. The sheets are bunched around his waist, his chest is bare, and his smile is so sleepy that it swells your heart to ten times it’s normal size.

We’ll see each other soon. You’ve got this.

“Okay,” you say it with conviction, forcing your hands to stop shaking, “I trust you.” And then without a moments hesitation, tears still running down your face, you touch the wires together.

The world explodes.

“There!” Spencer races for the place he saw the puff of dirt, nearly tripping over himself as he runs faster than he’s ever run before. Everyone follows, dropping to there knees with Spencer as he starts to push at the stone and sand at his feet.

“Please be here. Please be here.” He keeps saying, his heart climbing into his throat with every passing second he doesn’t find you. That is, until his fingers brush across an arm. He shoves down into the dirt, ignoring every instinct that tells him to stay clean. It’s you, it’s your arm. Then it’s your head, your shoulders and chest, your stomach, your legs, and then it’s you.

He pulls you on top of him, laying in the dirt with you pulled so close that you could meld into one person. You groan into his ear, pushing up just a little to get a better look at the man under you.

“I forgot your coffee.” He laughs, tears spilling onto the sides of his face as he wraps his arms back around you.

...

It’s late by the time you’ve been seen by what feels like every doctor and psychologist in the state. There’s bruises on your wrists and ankles you hadn’t noticed during your time underground and a cut on the back of your head where you’d been hit in order to be knocked unconscious. Not to mention the tiny cuts all over your arms and face from crawling through a shattered windshield and up through rocks and dirt.

You stood in the conference room, arms crossed as you leaned against the table and stared. Staring back at you was your own face, tacked to the evidence board with four other victims.

“I tried going to your apartment, but nobody answered the door.” Spencer is standing in the doorway of the conference room, holding a box in his hands. You look down at it before looking back at him. Try as you might, you can’t tell if he’s opened it or not, either you aren’t a good profiler or you were just really tired.

“You left this at the hospital. I figured it was important if you brought it up with you from the car.” Moving into the room, he holds the box out for you to take from him. The ribbon you tied around it is still tightly knotted, the ends shredded from being dragged above ground. There’s specks of dirt that you reach out to brush to the floor before looking back at Spencer.

“It’s yours.” You reply, scooting back to sit on the table, watching curiously as he looks back down. Pulling the box back to his chest, he slips the ribbon off in one fluid motion. The lid is next and you watch as he reaches in to pull out what you had believed to be your last words.

It isn’t much, and there’s a possibility you don’t feel the same way, but I’ve realized that I’m hopelessly and irrevocably in love with you. I trust you with my life and my heart. I’m only scared now of losing you. -(Y/I)

He doesn’t look up at you and he doesn’t set the napkin aside, only moves his hand so the note is out of his line of sight as he sees the book inside.

“‘I love thee with all the breath, smiles, tears of all my life.’” He says it almost in a whisper before setting the note back in the box, and the box on the table.

“How long have you been waiting to give this to me?” When he looks at you, finally, there is wonder in his eyes, amazement.

“I bought the book last month, but I’ve known how I felt about you for six months.” You pick at the edge of the table, swinging your legs ever so slightly. Spencer moves in front of you, blocking your view of the evidence board.

“I don’t believe in love at first sight. Robert Sternberg developed the theory that love is made of three components; intimacy, passion, and commitment. None of which can be present during a first meeting. But I think I knew that I would love you. I knew from the very first time you walked in those doors and you bumped into me.” He reaches his hand out, only hesitating for just a moment before he takes you cheek in his hand.

“Can I kiss you?” He leaned so close that if he were just a hair closer, you lips would brush together as he spoke. You’ve already closed your eyes, every nerve lit up like the Fourth of July in anticipation.

“Yes.” You barely get it out before his lips collide with yours, you can feel every emotion from the last twenty four hours being poured into this kiss; fear, anxiety, sadness, confusion, anger, relief, love, safety.

You reach out to loop your arms around his neck, the kiss deepening as he grabs your hips to slide you closer. When he finally breaks the kiss, his chest heaving and his cheeks flushed, it takes him a minute to open his eyes.

“Why aren’t you at home?”

“I’m scared.”

“Why?” You loop the hair that curls against his neck around your index finger, licking your lips before responding.

“Because I’m afraid this will all be a dream and I’ll wake up back in that car.” Your breath hitches in your throat, the panic grabbing at your heart and lungs and barely leaving you anytime to process the plethora of things that have happened to you in the last thirty minutes.

“Come sleep at my place, that way you wake up with me by your side.” He steps away from the table, reaching out a hand for you to take. It takes you no time at all to make your decision, grabbing his hand and sliding off the table.

“Okay, I trust you.”

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possiamo-andare · 4 years

Text

Liar: JJ Maybank

JJ x Reader

(gif made by @rudypankows )

MASTERLIST

word count: over 9k (haha)

a/n: this is very angsty and I barely edited because it's so long. I'm so sorry in advance, the ending kinda sucks. I hope y'all like it tho!

description: this is a one part imagine, involving JJ and the reader (y/n). The reader and JJ meet at a beach party one night and start sleeping with eachother, but only staying friends. Soon, they fall for eachother and a sexual relationship turns into a romantic one. But JJ is hiding something and once it is revealed, will they ever be the same?

You rarely lied. As a kid, you would get hives when you lied to someone; your guilty conscience affecting your body. Lying was typically a very hard thing for you to do. It meant you were betraying someone's trust, and since you couldn't bear upsetting anyone, you couldn't lie. It got you in trouble all the time but your inability to lie was also your greatest strength. People appreciate your honesty and found your personality magnetic.

With that being said, you lied that night and it didn't even hurt you.

He had looked so good, you told yourself that. That was the problem. He had just looked so damn good that night at the beach almost anyone would lie to themselves to get him. Even just a taste.

You wanted to ignore him at first. Maybe if you didn't care enough, he wouldn't notice you. Because, god, if he noticed you, then he'd come over and then you couldn't promise anything. So, you averted your gaze and instead paid attention to Kie as she spoke, telling you about the newest charity she was saving money to donate to. You had, once in a while, glanced his way but he had always been looking somewhere else so you thought that he hadn't noticed your stares. Until, you had accidentally looked his way when he was watching you. You knew it was an honest mistake and something that eventually would've happened since you were looking so often, but you were embarrassed nonetheless. You were trying to convince yourself he didn't even notice you when he walked your way. You felt his eyes burning into you and you mustered every ounce of self control you had and didn't look at him as he walked closer and closer to you and Kie.

When he finally approached, he spoke to Kie first. "Hey Kie." His eyes drifted towards you again, this time a smirk evident on his face. Him watching you made you shift uncomfortably. You knew he was taking you all in.

Kie smiled at him and briefly hugged him. Then she looked at you, a nervous smile on your face, as she introduced you. "This is my friend Y/N. Y/N, this is JJ."

You nodded towards JJ. "Hi." That name sounded familiar but you couldn't quite remember. You went to the same school as Kie, you being a Pogue but getting a scholarship to the academy. You were an intelligent individual but you knew, when it came to boys, you were just about the dumbest person in the world. You'd probably sell your left kidney just for a kiss with this boy you had never met before. It was dumb, but you were a teenager and hopefully would grow out of it.

"Hey, nice to meet you." He extended his hand for you to shake.

You looked down at it and shook it, electricity coursing through your veins.

"What's your last name?"

JJ smirked, sizing you up once more. "Maybank."

JJ Maybank. You had heard about JJ and the things you heard didn't necessarily put a good taste in your mouth. But who were you to judge? Besides he was hot, and you doubted he would ever go for you. This was a harmless feeling.

Except it wasn't. One second, you were talking to JJ about surfing and the next second he was asking if you'd like to come back to his place. It had all happened so fast you were sure you had misunderstood him when he spoke. But then he asked you again and you were surprised. What surprised you even more was that you said yes.

"This is a one time thing." You lied to JJ, untying your shoes at his doorway.

He removed his shirt, pushing his hair out of his face. "Okay." He was smirking at you as you undressed, almost as if he didn't believe what you said.

You believed yourself that night, but soon came to realize that was so far from the truth. That one night had been amazing and you had thought that would be it. But it was not that easy. It never was with JJ. Before you knew it, only a week later, you saw him again. This time with a brunette leaning against him.

You had been invited by Kie again to meet John B. and Pope. You had gladly decided to come, partly because you wanted to meet Kie's other friends and also because you knew JJ would be there. But you hadn't expected him to be kissing someone else. Although you wanted it to be you, you knew that wasn't possible. Besides, why did you care? You were not gonna let some blonde Pogue mess with you. It was one night. It was amazing, but you had told him never again.

Then, it happened again. You were talking to John B. about helping him fix his car when, out of nowhere, JJ entered the conversation. He stood beside you and barely spoke but you felt his presence and that was enough. Once you and him were alone again, the conversation was short.

"Hey." He stated, matter-of-factly.

"Hi." You replied, pushing the hair out of your face.

"Didn't think I'd see you here." JJ smirked, taking a few steps closer to you. You remembered how harshly you swallowed. Boys like JJ rarely made you nervous.

"Well I am." You said defensively. You weren't about to let this boy play you. "Sorry I interrupted your fun with the brunette. What's her name?"

JJ chuckled. "Lacey. And you ruined nothing. To be honest, I wish it was you."

And then, that was it. Again, for the second time, you were in JJ's bed. Your clothes had been torn off before your body had even hit the bed. Shortly after JJ's were too. You barely had time to think, let alone speak but you managed to in between kisses.

"This is the last time." You smirked, both of you now knowing you were lying.

You wished you weren't lying that night. You wished you hadn't slept with JJ again. Maybe, you thought, everything that happened after would've been easier.

After that second night, you and JJ started a relationship. He wasn't your boyfriend, he made that clear to you. You hadn't really wanted him to be anyways. You had just gotten out of a long term relationship and didn't want your heart broken. You chose the wrong guy again because JJ loved breaking hearts. He did it for fun.

The rules were simple. You'd only call each other at night and you would leave right after. No real conversations, no love, just sex. And for a month, that was easy enough. You needed him during that month as much as he needed you. You weren't looking for something serious, just to fool around. You were sick and tired of commitment and heartbreak and just wanted to relax and have fun. JJ never had commitments and enjoyed the company. He hadn't had a girlfriend in ages and there was rarely a girl who wanted this kind of relationship. He was really happy to know that you were that type of girl. And he believed that as long as you continued to be that type of girl, this could go on forever.

Except it didn't.

You weren't really sure when everything changed but if you had to guess, you'd say it was the night he climbed through your bedroom window.

Your parents were out on a date night when you heard tapping on your window. At first you thought it was the tree outside your room but when it persisted, you decided to look for yourself. That's where you found JJ, leaning against your window sill. In a moment of shock, you opened the window and pulled him through. You were so shocked to see him mostly because the rules had been that if he wanted to have sex, he had to call you first. You had just been on your phone and since you hadn't gotten a call or text, you wondered why he was here in the first place. You were so shocked to see him here you almost didn't see his face. But once you did, you couldn't look away.

As he took a seat on the edge of your bed, you gasped. Not only was his face covered in blood and open wounds, he clutched his right side, as if he had broken a rib. You didn't hate blood, you hated the smell. To you, blood smelled like old iron and it made you nauseous. You probably would've become a doctor if it wasn't for the fact that the smell of blood made you nauseous. Maybe it was all the adrenaline of seeing JJ outside your window or the fact that he was badly beaten up, but you didn't feel nauseous when you smelled the blood coming off him. Your mind was too busy to remember to be nauseous.

You went to sit beside him, your hand coming to touch his face. "JJ..." The second your hand touched his cheek, he winced and pulled away.

"My dad got drunk." JJ stated, looking at his feet. He was clearly embarrassed and when you didn't speak, he continued. "I didn't know where to go. John B. is with Sarah and I don't wanna bother Pope or Kie."

You nodded. "I'm gonna get you cleaned up."

You knew JJ's dad was a deadbeat father. Everyone in OBX did. When he wasn't gambling, he was getting piss drunk in his home. A lot of people believed that JJ would bear the brunt of his father's alcoholism but you didn't want to believe it. You didn't want to believe that a father hurt his only child. Your parents weren't the best, being Pogues they rarely parented and you were frequently left to your own devices, but they never laid a finger on you. You didn't want to believe someone as seemingly happy as JJ would be suffering from physical abuse behind closed doors. Now, you knew it to be true.

You wanted to cry for JJ. But you stayed strong and fixed him the best you could. You got some disinfectant and a cloth, with tons and tons of bandages and got to work. First, you washed his face. As the water cleansed his face, your sink started to look like a crime scene. The amount of blood that went down the drain almost made you think that people's water was gonna start to taste like iron. Once his face was washed, you realized that there were only really two big gashes on his face. One, right over his cheek and the other on his forehead. With some disinfectant and bandages, you knew it would heal in a couple of weeks. As for JJ, you didn't know if he would heal.

"This is gonna hurt." You said as you held the cloth you soaked in disinfectant. JJ was sitting on the edge of your bathtub as you spoke to him.

He nodded. "Got any liquor?"

You smiled, shaking your head. "Sorry."

JJ sighed, shrugging his shoulders. "It's whatever."

And with that, you started to disinfect his wounds. At first, he was wincing but the more you cleaned, the less he did. Finally, when the two wounds on his face were clean, you put three bandages on each wound. Then, you moved onto his side, where he was clutching it tenderly. You knew that this was way out of your area of expertise but you wanted to help the best you could. And you knew JJ would never agree to go to a hospital.

"You gotta take off your shirt." You stated, pointing to the bloody shirt he still was wearing.

JJ smirked, looking down. "You want me right now?"

You couldn't help but smile. Even in this state, he could make you laugh. How was he so strong? "No. I need to see if you're hurt anywhere else."

JJ nodded, still smirking as he lifted his shirt over his head. "Anything to see me naked."

You were about to counter with a snarky remark, but you never got the chance. Your breath was caught in your throat when you saw what was underneath JJ's shirt. Where he was clutching his side, was a large purple bruise that expanded through his entire side. It was horrendous and you knew it would turn black before it started to heal but that wasn't even the worst of it. There were smaller bruises all over his stomach and back. They were small but you could tell they were large before and were just starting to heal. You wondered how you didn't see them before. It was dark when you were together but it couldn't have been that dark. Granted, you weren't really looking out to see if there was bruising but you couldn't believe that you had missed these before.

You were silent for minutes and finally, JJ spoke. "I never wanted you to see them. That's why I want to only see you at night."

You looked to JJ's face, his expression unreadable. Although he was expressionless, you were not. Your face was in a deep frown and there were tears pooling in your eyes, threatening to spill over any moment. You wanted to speak, but you didn't know what you could say. What was there to say?

Finally, you found your voice. "JJ..." Your voice was weak and soft, filled with emotion. You reached for his hand but when he realized you were about to cry, he pulled away.

"No," he said defiantly. "Don't get emotional. I'm fine." He was acting so strong. Why?

You nodded, blinking back tears. You refused to cry. "I'll get you some ice. Go lay on my bed."

You barely looked at JJ in the face as you left the bathroom to go get ice. This was too much for you, and it seemed like another normal Saturday night for JJ. You couldn't decide whether to feel so bad for him or angry that he wasn't letting you cry. You knew he was holding back tears, just like you, but he resented that you wanted to cry. You knew you weren't strong like JJ. All this time, all those beatings, and you would've cracked. You would've ran away or worse, but JJ kept going back. That night, your opinion of JJ changed.

The rest of the night consisted of you icing JJ's side and not speaking. You tried to get him to talk but he refused. You started with asking him about why his dad was doing this and for how long but he wouldn't answer you. Then you asked what had happened this time but he didn't want to talk about it. He complained he was tired and just wanted to sleep. You knew this was breaking a rule, but you cuddled beside him, laying your head in his chest to hear his heartbeat. He seemed way more calm when you were beside him.

Finally, after an hour of trying to get him to talk, you spoke for the last time. "Why'd you come to me?"

JJ shrugged one of his shoulders, the other one not moving because it was under your body. "I trust you."

You were shocked but too tired to say anything. You just laid there with him, hoping that you helped take some of the pain away. You hoped you had made some type of difference but you knew that with JJ, you were never sure.

After that night, things were different. JJ started calling you less and less and when you called him, he started making up more excuses. Sometimes you both went a week without speaking to each other and then he blamed it on how busy he was. You rarely hooked up, and when you did, it felt different. There was way more kissing and the kissing was more passionate and longer. Before, you had raced to take your clothes off and now, you let JJ make the first move. You felt different and at first, you thought it was because you felt closer to JJ. He had come to you in a time of need and you now were considered friends. That's why you thought it felt different. But then, JJ started acting very differently and you knew it wasn't just you. He would stay with you afterwards. He used to get dressed before you had time to catch your breath but now, he lingered on your bed and near you. You knew he wanted to stay the night but didn't know how to ask. And you were scared to tell him to stay. You didn't want to scare him.

JJ was not the relationship type of guy but that's basically what you were. You had stopped sleeping with anyone else entirely after that night and focused solely on thinking of JJ. You knew what a crush felt like and you knew that you were developing feelings for JJ. But, it was so hard for you to know if he felt the same way. Sometimes, you were sure he felt the same way. There were days where he couldn't keep his hands off you and was so passionate you couldn't stop smiling. Then there were other days where he wouldn't text you back and didn't answer your calls. You weren't sure if he was sleeping with other girls but you didn't want to ask. If he was, you knew it would hurt you.

Three days before the incident, JJ was having one of those days where he wasn't talking to you. You had texted him to ask him if he was going to Kie's party tonight but he only read it and didn't respond. You had just seen each other the night before and he was so loving and passionate that you thought for sure he felt the same. He had even stayed to cuddle afterward and talk to you about his day. You were smiling and laughing with each other and you were starting to feel like a real couple. Now, he wasn't responding to a simple question you asked. You felt so defeated. You couldn't tell what he was feeling and you felt like you were being strung along. You wanted to sit down and talk to him but you knew JJ and he didn't like that type of stuff. For JJ to even say he was happy was a lot since he rarely talked about his emotions.

That day, you felt used. You knew he was playing you. You convinced yourself, in that moment, that if he likes you he would've already told you. You convinced yourself he didn't like you. You told yourself, if he came to Kie's party, you would ignore him all night and talk to some other guy. There was no reason to wait around for someone who didn't appreciate you.

So, as you got ready for Kie's party, you turned off your phone. If he was gonna try to call or text you, you would make sure you couldn't see it. It would be way too tempting to keep your phone open. As you buttoned your shorts, you continued to tell yourself that this was for your own good. There's no point in being with someone who couldn't even decide if they liked you or not.

When you got to Kie's party, you instantly looked for alcohol. If you wanted to distract yourself, alcohol was your best option right now. You were halfway done with your second cup when Kie found you.

"Hey honey." She said, slowly taking the drink out of your hands. You fought her grasp for a second but when she started to glare at you, you let the cup go.

You plastered on a fake smile. "Hi Kie."

She threw out the remainder of your drink before hugging you tightly. "You're gonna need to be sober tonight."

You frowned, your brain already a bit foggy. "Why?"

Kie let go of you, glancing at the beach for a moment before looking back at you. "Rafe is here."

You wanted to gasp, but it came out more as a hiccup. Unfortunately, Rafe was your ex. You were together for a year before he cheated on you with someone else. You and Rafe had many great memories together but they were all tainted by the fact that he had cheated on you. Kie had told you from the beginning that a Pogue and a Kook dating was not a good idea but you were dumb and did it anyways. The good thing about Kie is that she never said I told you so. She just hugged you until you stopped crying. Now, you had to face Rafe for the first time since you broke up months ago.

Surprisingly, you reacted normally. You shrugged, looking behind you to John B., who was handling the keg. "JB! Can ya get me another cup?"

John B. looked over to Kie, who was glaring at him. John B. knew not to mess with Kie. He then looked back to you and shook his head. "Sorry."

You frowned, glaring at Kie. "Seriously?"

Kie just smirked. "You need to be on your best behavior."

You shrugged, a devilish idea popping onto your mind. "I will."

Kie frowned. "I know that look."

You smiled, the idea in your head about to turn into a reality. "Step aside."

Kie shook her head but you were quick to push her away and walk ahead of her, straight in the direction of Rafe. Kie followed behind you, pleading for you not to talk to him. You had never resolved your problems with Rafe and you knew that was something he wanted to do. So, in an effort to get a rise out of JJ, you were gonna talk to Rafe. You knew he was somewhere at this party and if he saw you and his nemesis speaking again, you hoped he would cause a scene. It was a shitty thing to do but it was the only way to know how JJ truly felt about you.

Once you got closer to the ocean, you spotted Rafe. He was sipping on a red cup, probably filled with beer, as he talked to Topper. When he saw you, he almost spit out his drink. You locked eyes for a moment before Kie stepped in front of you, blocking your view of him.

"No way. He cheated Y/N." Kie said, grabbing a hold of your hand.

You nodded. "I know."

Kie had a confused look on her face. "Then why talk to him?"

You looked over her shoulder and started to watch as Rafe made his way over to you. "Because of JJ."

Kie looked even more confused for a moment but then caught on. She had only suspected that there was something going on between the two of you but had no proof. Your omission right there was enough proof.

"Don't do this." Kie argued again, trying to convince you that this entire situation was a bad idea. She had seen what a jealous JJ was capable of and she knew if he felt even some feelings for you, this would not end well.

"If JJ can't admit his feelings towards me, I'll just talk to someone you will." You said to Kie, finally looking away from her one last time.

Right behind Kie stood Rafe. The red cup in his hand before was now gone and he was smiling at you. He had come tonight knowing you'd probably be here. He knew he had made a mistake and was willing to fix it between the two of you. You were always such a good girlfriend and he missed hanging out with you. He hoped you were open to fixing things too.

"Hey." Rafe said, causing Kie to turn around. She took one look at Rafe and rolled her eyes before looking back at you. You smiled at her and she sighed, walking away. Kie was done. If this is what you wanted, there was no way to stop you.

"Hi Rafe." You giggled, twirling your hair around your finger. You needed to be extra flirty with Rafe. The more you acted like you still liked him, you hoped the more upset JJ would be.

"I wanted to talk to you. I hoped we could talk about what happened." He said, stepping closer to you.

You nodded, holding back a gag. Truth be told, there was nothing on this earth that could make you like Rafe again. "Sure."

"I just wanna say how fucking sorry I am." Rafe began, grabbing your hand. You wanted to flinch but you didn't. "I was such a fool and I realize that now. I want you back Y/N."

You smiled, pretending to be happy with what he was saying. To be honest, you wanted to gag. The boy had cheated on you for half of your relationship with a girl that, as far as you knew, he was still seeing. There was no way in hell you would ever take him back. He didn't have to know that. You felt like it was justice now. Maybe Rafe was getting what he deserved.

Before you could speak and tell Rafe you were willing to give him a chance, you felt two hands on your arm. The hands grabbed where Rafe was holding your arm and ripped you both away. You recognized the person immediately. It was JJ, and he was fuming. He barely even looked at you as he made his way to stand in front of you, standing in between you and Rafe.

JJ turned to you, his brows furrowed and his jaw set. "What the hell are you doing?"

You rolled your eyes. "Just talking to Rafe."

Rafe moved from behind JJ to beside him. He grabbed a hold of JJ's shoulder and tried to move him. JJ didn't budge, still glaring at you. You knew it was working. Finally, you had some type of answer. JJ had unresolved feelings for you. Now, he just had to admit it.

"Why?" JJ questioned, glaring at Rafe for a moment before looking to you again. Although he was mad, you could tell his expression softened when he looked at you.

Before you could speak, Rafe grabbed a hold of JJ's shoulders and pushed him away from me. Then, Rafe spoke. "We're trying to work shit out."

JJ moved out of the way but only enough for Rafe to squeeze forward. You kept your eyes on JJ, who was now beyond confused. Rafe was speaking to you again but you tuned him out and watched as JJ tried to figure out why the hell you would want to work things out with Rafe. Finally, it seemed to click. When it did, JJ grabbed your hand and pulled you away from Rafe. Your hand felt as if it was on fire and you wanted to smile so badly but you kept the frown on your face. Rafe tried to follow you but JJ stood in front of him so your eyes were only on JJ's now.

As you looked into his eyes, he grabbed a hold of your shoulders and brought you close to him. "If you want to know how I feel, just ask me."

Rafe spoke up now. "What the fuck are you -"

"Rafe!" You spoke up, glaring at Rafe for a moment. You tore your gaze away from JJ for a moment only to finally give Rafe a piece of your mind. "I'd only get back together with you if we were the last two people on earth, and maybe not even then."

Rafe was taken aback. He had definitely not thought you were going to act so rude but you could care less. "JJ..." Rafe began to say but JJ ignored him. You didn't know why Rafe was so confused by JJ's reaction but you didn't care. JJ was about to tell you how he felt and that was all that mattered.

There was nothing for Rafe to say to make you like him and he knew it. So, with that, he turned and left. Finally, your eyes were back on JJ.

"You have to tell me." You said, crossing your arms over your chest.

JJ smirked, cupping your face in his hands. "You have to ask me."

You rolled your eyes. "How do you feel?"

JJ smiled this time, pulling you closer. "I like you Y/N. A lot."

You smiled back, wanting to scream for joy. Finally, there was no more confusion. "I like you too. A lot."

Finally, the two of you kissed. There was no more confusion or lies. It was just you and JJ, kissing. This kiss was different. It was full of promises. You liked each other, for real now, and you were not afraid to admit it. This is what it felt like to kiss someone you liked you, wholeheartedly. Someone who wanted you. Someone who cared. It had been so long since you had kissed someone who had cared about you.

That weekend before the incident, was probably the best weekend of your life. It was just you and JJ the entire weekend. The first two days were spent at your house. You just stayed together, half naked, talking and laughing and watching tv. There was no drama or confusion. It was just you and him. The kisses felt so real. The feelings felt so good. You felt a little more whole. You felt as though JJ felt the same. Those two days at your house were not only passionate but they were also a time where you got to know one another. This entire time, the both of you didn't know much about each other. Those two days in your house were spent getting to know each other. You learned that JJ loved fixing cars and wanted to own a hot tub one day. You knew his favourite colour and his favourite sport. And finally he opened up about his dad. When the abuse began, when it got worse and even what instigated his father that night he came to your house. You didn't cry and neither did he. You just soaked in his words and let him say his peace before comforting. JJ had opened up to you more in those two days than he had since he met you. You knew why. It was because you finally were a couple and he finally could be honest with someone. To JJ, it was the best feeling in the world. But, even as he spoke to you, he knew he was lying between his teeth.

The third day, you both had been at JJ's house. His dad had gone south for the weekend to gamble so you and JJ decided to get some fresh air and stay in his backyard for the day. There was only one lawn chair in his backyard but you both made it work. JJ sat down on it as you sat on his lap and cuddled onto him. For a couple of hours, you just laid there with him, talking at different times about everything. You felt so free now and you believed JJ felt the same. You knew it was because everything was out in the open. Everything had been said and anything that hadn't was still being developed. Even if it was just you and JJ laying on a chair, you still felt excited. You were with JJ and not scared anymore. You knew how he felt and it just felt so good to be wanted. It had felt like it had been a lifetime since you felt wanted.

When the sun finally set, you knew you had to say goodbye. Your parents were probably worried for you and JJ's dad would be back the next morning. The weekend was coming to an end and you were so upset. You and JJ had been in this bubble the entire weekend and you didn't want to break it. It was so hard to say goodbye. It took you and JJ ten minutes to say goodbye. You made plans to see each other tomorrow but it still felt like such a long time. You stood on JJ's front lawn for ten minutes, kissing and hugging each other until you were the first to pull away. You knew if you didn't get home soon, your parents would ground you.

"I gotta go." You whined as JJ kissed you again.

He wasn't letting you go. "No."

You pried away from his grip. You didn't want to leave. Being with JJ always made you feel better, even more so now. "I gotta. I'll see you tomorrow."

Finally, JJ lets you leave. With one last kiss, you turn away from him and walk away. As you walk down JJ's block, there's an evident smile on your face. You probably look like a crazy woman to the neighbours but you could care less. It had been a long road, through so much confusion, but you finally were with JJ.

You thought back to the time when you first met JJ. You had promised him it was a one time thing and you knew it was a lie. It felt like years ago when you first met him when in reality, it had only been a couple of months. You pictured his face the first time you met him. He had the devilish smirk on his face and his pupils were dilated. You remembered how you felt, and it didn't compare to how you felt now. You had never felt this strong about someone in ages and it felt so good to be appreciated. You had known that night, whether you'd admit it or not, that JJ was going to change your life. You had texted Kie that night and told her -

Your phone.

As you made your way onto the steps of your house, you remembered you forgot your phone at JJ's house. Dammit. You sighed and opened your front door, hoping your parents would let you go back quickly to get it.

Thankfully, your parents were sitting in your living room when you entered your house. They greeted you quietly but you told them you can't stay because they remembered you forgot your phone at Kie's house. You had told them you were at Kie's house and of course, they believed you. Your dad warned you to be quick and soon and you promised that you would. You were out the door and down your steps before your parents had time to warn you again.

Although it was inconvenient to walk all the way back to JJ's house, you couldn't help but smile. Not only would it be a cute surprise but you also wanted to see JJ again. You had missed him already.

You raced back to JJ's house and made it in ten minutes, cutting your travel time in half. You were desperate to see him again, even if it was only for five minutes. Your excitement died down once you saw JJ's house.

The first thing you noticed that was out of place was that there was a BMW in JJ's driveway. JJ didn't have a car, let alone a BMW. That was something a Kook had. You looked at the license plate and it seemed familiar but you couldn't place it. As you passed the car, you slowed down. Something about this car made your body go cold, even on a hot summer night like this. Your gut was telling you something, but you didn't want to believe it.

You somehow knew that you had to be quiet. As you made your way up the steps of JJ's house, you tiptoed towards the door. The closer you got, the more you realized that the door was slightly open, a glimmer of light from the house spilling into the darkness of night. You leaned forward, peeking through the slightly ajar door, hoping to get a glimpse of what was going on.

"Don't!" You heard JJ yell, his figure coming into the limited space you could see. He was yelling at someone that you couldn't see.

"Why? Because you know she'll hate you?" The voice made you gasp softly. You knew who it was. It was Rafe. It was Rafe's car that was in the driveway. Why was he here? And who were they talking about?

"Shut your fucking mouth!" JJ seethed, grabbing ahold of Rafe's collar and finally pulling him into your eyesight.

Rafe pushed JJ off of him, shoving him into the wall. You wanted to scream but you knew if you did, you'd never find out what they were talking about. "If you don't tell her, I will."

JJ looked so defeated. You wanted to reach out to him. "Please don't. I love her."

You knew who they were talking about now. It was you. JJ had done something only Rafe knew about. It was something he knew you'd hate him for. What could he have done?

Rafe played with his keys in his hand. "I paid you to go out with her only for you to break her heart. So she'd come back to me. What was so fucking hard about that? Not my fault you love her. I want my money back."

Rafe paid him? No. You couldn't believe it. Wouldn't. Everything felt so real. JJ's feelings felt real. You knew it was too good to be true. Even before he approached you for the first time, you had a feeling he would never like you. When he showed interest, you were surprised. When he approached you the second time, you were even more surprised. It all made sense now. Why was JJ so reluctant to like you, why he pulled you away from Rafe when you were trying to talk to him at Kie's party. He was playing you. But it all felt so real.

You must've gasped really loud because JJ and Rafe heard you from inside. JJ had swung the door open, scared to see who was on the other side. He knew if it was you, it would be over for him. When he saw you, crying, he realized what he had done.

When you saw JJ reach out for you, you moved away. He disgusted you. How could he? How could Rafe? Granted, Rafe was an asshole but at least he wore it on his sleeve. JJ had tricked you. And you could never forgive him. You backed away from both JJ and Rafe, slowly moving down JJ's steps.

"Y/N..." JJ began, following you down the steps. Rafe just watched behind JJ, clearly enjoying the misery he caused.

"Get away from me." You seethed, tears rolling down your face so fast. God, you felt sick. You felt so nauseous. Everything was a lie.

"I'm so sorry." JJ frowned, tears in his eyes. He seemed to shrink down as he walked towards you. The closer he walked though, the farther you walked.

"You liar!" You screeched, your voice raspy. You could barely breathe. It hurt so much.

JJ shook his head, his arms out towards you. "No, no. I love you Y/N."

You shook your head, wrapping your hands around your body, hugging yourself. You closed your eyes for a moment and stopped walking. This couldn't be real. You didn't want it to be real.

You felt JJ come closer to you, finally wrapping his arms around you. You let him embrace you, even if you didn't hug him back. This was the last time he would touch you. The last time he'd hurt you. God, you had been so stupid.

The hug only lasted ten seconds because the second you collected yourself, you pushed him away. He looked so hurt, tears running down his face. You wanted to hug him, you still had feelings for him, but you knew you couldn't. He betrayed you. He lied to you.

"You're a liar." You said coldly, finally turning around and running away.

You ran and ran and ran. Away from JJ's house and away from Rafe. Away from everything that you once loved. You didn't even stop to catch your breath, your mind wouldn't let you. You believed that maybe if you ran far enough, you wouldn't be in so much pain. You wanted to run away from all your problems.

You made it to your house in record time. By the time you entered your home, your parents were gone. They left a note on your bed saying that they went out for the night and would be back by midnight. You didn't care. You used to care. You used to leave you but it seemed as if everyone was leaving you recently.

You curled up into a ball on your bed and closed your eyes. Once your eyes were closed, you blocked the images of JJ that flooded your mind. You remembered you hadn't gotten your phone but you didn't care. You just wanted to sleep. You cried so much your chest was starting to hurt and you knew the only way for all of this to stop, was for you to rest your body and mind. It was easy for you to fall asleep. Your eyelids were already droopy from all the crying that it only took a couple of minutes for you to fall asleep. Once you did, you slept the entire night. You started to dream about JJ, but you stopped yourself. Your brain wasn't ready for that yet. You needed time.

And this is where you were now. You hadn't talked to JJ in two days. Kie had come by to drop your phone off and she tried to comfort you but you didn't speak. It was hard to comfort someone who didn't want to be comforted. You felt so empty. You felt stupid too. You had been so eager to trust JJ, even when Rafe had betrayed your trust already. But you were a good person. You guessed this was your punishment.

When Kie couldn't comfort you, John B. had tried to come over. At first, you didn't want to let him in, but with some coaxing, you finally opened your door to him.

You wanted to ask how JJ was but you told yourself you shouldn't care anymore. He wasn't yours anymore. He never was.

John B., tired of the silence, was the first to speak. "JJ is a wreck."

This got your attention. You had hoped he was. So were you. You didn't say anything to John B. when he said this, just nodded solemnly.

"I've never seen him like this. He's really sorry." John B. said, sitting down beside you.

You scowled. "Did you only come here to make me feel shitty? JJ lied to me. He betrayed me. I could care less if he was dying."

John B. didn't even react to what you were saying, almost as if he knew you were going to say that. "Yeah. I know. I wanted to come to see how you were doing, but I'd be lying if I said JJ didn't want me to come to see how you were doing."

You looked at John B., the scowl replaced with a frown. "If he wants to talk to me, he can come here himself." You didn't want him to, but you knew the only way to end this was to tell JJ yourself.

John B. nodded. "When can he meet you then?"

You had decided with John B. that you were going to meet JJ at the beach, where you first met. You guessed it was only fitting. You had gotten ready a couple hours before you were set to meet with him. You wanted to look a bit presentable, only to show JJ that you looked better than he did. Even if it was not true, you wanted to appear like you moved on. You put on some makeup and changed into a new tank top with black shorts, praying to God that you looked a little better than you were. You wanted to appear as if you had healed, even if you hadn't.

Waiting on the beach was absolute torture. You had been ten minutes early which was your fault entirely. You wanted to have some control over the situation, even though you knew you weren't in control. As you waited, you began to feel yourself start to cry. You couldn't believe how much everything changed. Only days ago you and JJ were together and happy, and now you could barely think about him without crying. Everything has gone so messed up. Although you desperately wanted to go back to the time where you two were still together, you knew that you couldn't do that. You had the truth now and as much as those old memories were good, you didn't want to forget the truth. You would come here with only one purpose. You needed to end things with JJ completely.

JJ was late by three minutes. You wanted to be upset but you know why he was late. You knew he wanted to prolong this conversation because he knew why you wanted to talk to him. You were here to end things for good and JJ didn't want that. By the time he finally arrived on the beach, he prepared himself. You were doing the same.

Once he was close enough, you spoke first. "Hello." You were cold as you spoke, almost as if you were talking to a stranger.

JJ knew he deserved this kind of behaviour from you but it still hurt him deeply. With every ounce of being he had in him, he replied. "Hi."

"I think you know why I want to talk to you." You said, the coldness in your voice still evident. You are afraid that if he even showed a small hint of emotion, you would break down and start crying all over again.

JJ nodded, tears in his eyes. He knew how stupid he was. When Rafe had come up to him before the beach party, he had been planning to take this other girl named Lacey out but he had offered JJ $2,000 just to break some girl's heart. JJ did that shit for free and to get money for it oh, it seemed like a deal. He slept with you once and although he felt something, he ignored it. He got his money but Rafe was still unhappy because you hadn't reached out to him yet. So Rafe told JJ to hook up with you a second time but this time JJ didn't ask for any money. It felt wrong in JJ's eyes. He actually had a good time with you. You were a good person and it felt wrong. But he liked you enough to continue sleeping with you. Not for Rafe, before himself. After that night where you patch him up, he knew he couldn't deny his feelings for you anymore. He went back and forth in his mind, debating whether he should pursue things with you or not. You had made it clear many times that you felt something for him and although he felt something for you, there was a little voice in his head telling him that what he was doing screwed up because he hadn't liked you at first. There were so many times where he wanted to tell you but he didn't want to ruin anything because for the first time he actually ever felt happy with someone. Then he ruined everything. And now you never want to speak to him again.

JJ wanted to explain everything to you in detail and try to make you understand the situation that he was put in. There was no point though. He still had done a screwed-up thing to you and he didn't deserve you.

"After tonight, I never want to talk to you again." You said plainly, crossing your arms over your chest. The sun was setting soon and you knew you should be getting home. But you needed one more thing from JJ. "Why'd you do it?"

JJ had been looking at his feet the entire time but when you said this he finally made eye contact with you. "Do what?"

You let a tear slide down your cheek and you watched as JJ frowned even more. "Why did you just break my heart like Rafe wanted? Why did you string me along?"

JJ sighed, looking at the ocean before getting the courage to look at you. He had hurt you beyond repair. He knew that there was nothing he could say, nothing he could do, to get you to forgive him. So he didn't sugar coat it. He just told you the truth.

"I could care less about you at first. I had seen you hanging out with Kie so many times before that first party and I thought you were cute but you were Kie's friend. Then race told me his plan and said he'd give me $2,000 if I could break your heart. I never cared about anyone. I was selfish. So at first, I did it. And it was easy. But you are so easy to love Y/N. You're kind and gentle. You didn't ask many questions when I came over to your house that night covered in cuts and bruises. You never pushed me to talk about my feelings because you knew that was not something that I was comfortable with. No one has done that. And I realized what I had been missing. But Rafe realized that you didn't love him anymore. He tried to get me to do it again and even offered more money but something told me not to do it." JJ took a moment to breathe, looking at the tears sliding down your face. He wondered what you were thinking. "It's so easy to be with you. I'm not easy to be around. I'm selfish and I'm cruel. I'm reckless. But you love me so much that you were patient. I know I should have told you. But it was so easy to be with you, that I didn't think I would be able to live without you. I'm sorry."

You didn't know how to react. This was the most JJ had ever expressed his feelings towards you. You'd be lying if you said you weren't surprised. You didn't know if it was enough though. You wondered if anything he did would be enough.

When you didn't respond to him, JJ knew. It wasn't enough. He loved you and he said all those nice things, but it wasn't enough. He was a liar and he betrayed you too deeply for you to forgive him. He understood. He didn't blame you. He didn't say anything else. He doubted you wanted to hear his voice ever again. He made no sound as he turned away from you and left. As he walked to the boardwalk and passed the beach, he couldn't help but cry. Although he had cried before, this time he knew it was the end. It wasn't enough.

You didn't know why JJ left. You are still trying to take in all those things that he said and by the time that you did, you realized that he was gone. You scanned the beach in the boardwalk and finally found him a hundred yards away. He didn't want to forgive him. You had come here tonight to make him hurt. You had come to end things completely. You had told yourself that no matter how much he pleaded, you were still going to walk away. But as much as you didn't want to admit it, you knew JJ and you knew when he was lying and when he wasn't. He wasn't lying now you knew he wasn't lying when you guys were together. He had screwed up. He had started a relationship with you for the wrong reasons. But he loved you. He loves you so much that he was willing to walk away if that made you happy. But you realized it didn't make you happy. And you wondered why you wanted to walk away in the first place. JJ had done all that terrible stuff before he knew you. And although it would take so much time for you to completely heal, you need JJ. So you ran after him.

"JJ!" You screamed, running closer and closer towards the boy you loved.

JJ stopped dead in his tracks. He thought his brain was playing tricks on him. But when you called for him the second time, he knew it was true. You had chased after him. You still wanted him. What had he done to deserve that? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

When he turned around, he saw you run to him. His tears instantly stopped and a huge smile fell over his lips. You had still loved him. You had run such a long way and JJ felt bad so he ran to you, trying to close to distance faster. Once you were close enough to touch, JJ reached out for you. When you reached out for him, he grabbed ahold of you, pulling you into a big hug. You both stood there for a moment, trying to catch your breath as you hugged. JJ was smiling so wide.

Once you caught your breath, you let go of JJ. You looked at him, his hands coming up cup your cheeks. He was smiling so wide and you felt yourself smiling too.

"You're easy to love too."

JJ didn't say anything, just pulled you close for a kiss. When your lips touched, you felt whole again. It would take some time but you needed JJ. And he needed you.

"I love you." JJ said, smiling wide.

You nodded, pulling him close. "I love you."

And you both weren't lying.

taglist: @jjmaybanxx @teamnick

#jj maybank #outer banks #jj obx #jj outer banks #obx fanfiction #obx #obx netflix #john b obx #john b outer banks #john b routledge #obx kiara #kiara carrera #kiara outer banks #pope obx #pope outer banks #pope heyward #obx rafe #jj x y/n #jj x reader

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anim3tingz · 3 years

Text

'Match-Up' for Shihozaki

Hey, Shiho. Sorry, it took so long. I really wanted to get someone that complimented you and also could bring something different to the table. In your request, you mentioned you were ‘Bi-Curious’ so I wanted to play off that. And, to be honest, I’m kind of happy I went that route. The boys of BNHA are amazing, but there’s some pretty amazing girls, too. ;)

Anyways, I hope you enjoy it.

I match you with...Kyoka Jiro (Earphone Jack)

Relationship Song: I Don’t Give A… -Missio/4Ever - The Veronicas/I Know I Know I Know - Tegan And Sara

Officially the coolest and most talented couple at UA.

I mean seriously, the two of you even came together and formed a band. (Think ‘The Veronicas’ vibes.)

You both just get on together really well. You just have similar hobbies, ideals, and opinions. Plus, I feel like your vibes really coincide with one another's.

Being introverted individuals, you guys tend to of course prefer each other's company over hanging out in a group. However, that doesn’t mean that you guys don’t get hyped up when you hang out with friends. Far from it. When around friends you guys tend to let loose more than you would at school.

Now when ya’ll hang out it usually involves having a jam session or just being in each other’s company while taking part in your individual hobbies. For instance, you could be reading a book while she’s laying down playing video games with her head in your lap. Just simple things like that.

Now, the both of you enjoy TikTok. In fact you both have a joint account, titled after your band, of course. As mentioned before, you guys are very talented, because of this you’ve managed to acquire quite a huge following. Since you guys can’t really perform outside of school, thanks to the UA’s strict rules and guidelines, you guys settled for showing your music and performing concerts through the platform. Jirou lets you manage the creating and editing of the videos. She knows how extremely knowledgeable you are on the subject. Plus, she loves watching you do your thing. She loves to ask questions because she’s genuinely curious, but also because whenever you talk about it you get this little twinkle in your eye and smile on your face that causes her heart to swell.

A typical date usually involves going into town and having a mini shopping day. Mainly hitting up the bookstore, music shop, and bakery. Sometimes you guys end up going with some friends and hit up the local karaoke bar.

Movie dates are also a thing, too. Either at home or to the local cinema.

Now Jiro doesn’t like to admit it but she loves sweet food. It’s, honestly, one of her weak spots, but don’t tell no one.

In fact, ya’ll love to go explore new cafes and bakeries to try out new desserts. Sometimes, when you guys are feeling a little daring or inspired from a recipe you saw online you guys will try to stay home and bake instead. If you ever need any help with anything you guys go to Sado for help. Oftentimes, you just end up having him bake it for ya’ll while you guys take a nap. What? 45 minutes is a long time.

Speaking of naps...

Once class is out for the day it’s not unusual for the two of you to go up to yours or Jiro’s dorm and just take a nap. Hell, sometimes ya’ll don’t even wake up for dinner and Mina as so come up and pull ya’ll out of your comas. Now, if it’s the weekend she doesn’t ever bother trying to mess with you guys.

Jiro doesn’t mind that you’re not a very optimistic person. The world can be a harsh place and people can be downright unbearable. So, she understands. Besides, you guys often end up having a lot of deep talks so she’s able to grasp your point of view on a lot of topics and issues.

You both tend to hold a ‘I give respect, if you deserve respect’ mentality. I mean so many people, especially people in positions of power, don’t deserve the respect they demand.

Aside from when you two are alone together, neither of you really show too much emotion, which is fine because you guys tend to save it for your music, anyways. Feelings are complicated and can be very hard to understand. Music just tends to be an easier emotional outlet for ya’ll.

Jiro knows you don’t like being told what to do, but sometimes it’s for your own good. This can be a point of aggravation between you two. However, it’s usually easily solved by having a deep talk. Being able to listen to both sides and see where the other is coming from is a big reason why ya’ll work so great together.

Now, Jiro is mostly confident, but there are times she tends to second guess herself and her abilities, especially when it comes to her being a hero. At times, like this she really needs you to be there for her. Just show her you love her and whisper encouraging words to her. She trusts your opinion more than anyone’s.

While Jiro can appear as being closed off and stand offish she actually has a really goofy side. I mean have you seen how much fun she pokes at Denki, especially when it comes to him short-circuiting himself. Your girl loves to drag him for that. It’s all in good fun. She loves the electric dork. He is her best friend after all. Because of this you can expect a lot of your group hang outs to be filled with their hilarious bantering. Throw in a few jokes of your own and Jiro will practically die laughing.

She respects and admires your realistic outlook about what you want/look for in a relationship. She loves that you know what you want and aren’t afraid to admit it. Jiro herself doesn’t like to sugar coat things. Heck, this blunt honesty is why ya’ll get along so well.

PDA:

Jiro while in public isn’t big on PDA. It’s a mixture of she’s shy and she believes stuff like that should be saved for the two of you when you’re in private. However, she isn’t ashamed to hold hands if you so wished.

If you two are just lounging on the couch in the common room she doesn’t mind if you lean up against her. And, if you feel like being a little bit of a tease and decide to sit in her lap you can guarantee she’ll turn into a blushing mess, but honestly, it’s just one of the many things only you can get away with. She’ll simply just wrap her arm around your waist and pull you closer to her.

Now, when in private she’s more open to being intimate with you. This mainly just involves sweet, passionate kisses. She’ll grasp your face and pull you close to her as she goes to lean in.

Jiro loves to hug you from behind wrapping her arms around your waist or shoulders. She loves to rest her head on your shoulder, especially if you're editing videos, reading or playing the piano/drums. She just loves watching you work on your passions. Sometimes, if she is in a particularly good mood she plant sweet kisses on your cheek. Only if you allow her of course. She’s able to sense if you don’t feel like being touched or kissed at any given moment.

Most times she asks for your permission before kissing you or hugging you, but there is the occasional time, especially in moments of high emotion, that she just goes in for one. She may seem calm and collected on the outside, but she actually feels a lot more than she lets on. She’s just not that good at expressing it a lot of the time. You guys are very similar in this regard and it’s one of the many reasons ya’ll work so well together. You understand each other better than anyone.

#mha #bnha #bnha matchup #bnha matchups #bnha jirou #bnha jiro kyoka #mha jiro kyoka #mha jirou #x reader #anime matchups #anime #open requests

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kenmas-consoles · 4 years

Text

HAIKYUU X READER PURGE KARASUNO EDITION

"₦Ø₮ ɆVɆⱤɎØ₦Ɇ ₵₳₦ ₥₳��Ɇ ł₮"

PROLOGUE:

It felt like any other day, for (Y/n) atleast. Walking the streets in such an ungodly hour should be a sin but the team had morning practice and this week she was assigned with key duty. With eyes lidded and a limp to her step dragging her body along the concrete pavements the girl could easily be mistaken as a corpse. This wasn't exactly uncharacteristic of her as she's normally this way after pulling all nighters on the day before morning practices. The last time this had happened Tsukishima had practically scrunched his nose in disgust towards his classmate and team manager seeing how much of a sleep deprived zombie she was.

A gust of wind sped past that made the girl shiver, cursing herself for not bringing a jacket she folded her amrs together.

"Oh, it's (Y/n)-chan!" Hinata said as he saw the girl sluggishly walking. He rode up to her in such inhuman speed flailing his arms a little bit to catch her attention.

"A simple hello would be nice, it's too early to make this much noise." The girl said burrying her face into his back as the boy offered her a ride on his bike.

"E-eh, sorry (Y/n)-chan I was jusy excited." The boy replied stiffening at her touch as well as making the tips of his ears go red, 'I've never been this close to a girl before' he thought only making his face burst with the same red hue. He silently thanked the gods she was practically half asleep and behind him.

"4:30 is way too early to be at school and practice is an hour later," Getting of the bike the female had whined stretching her arms crickets could be heard chirping in the background and the morning breeze had caused her to involuntarily shiver yet again.

"I didn't think I would get here this early normally I'd make it here by 5 on foot" the girl mumbled, puffing her cheeks as she said so.

Still somewhat sleepy she rubbed her eye and looked at the boy who was parked his bike at the bike rack by the school's entrance "Why are you up this early though?"

"Hmm," the boy put a finger on his lips, "No particular reason, I couldn't really sleep last night either maybe because I was excited for today's practice. Something big is happening today and I feel it in my bones."

While the girl had smiled at the boy's enthusiasm and her luck that they were able to cross paths today she let out a sleepy yawn.

"(Y/n)-chan sure is tired, were you not able to sleep last night too?"

The girl shook her head in response. Hinata then crouched down before her with his back facing her and offered her a ride on his back. After a bit of convincing the pair made their way on to the gym, with (Y/n) on Hinata's back.

★彡★彡★彡

It was currently 6:52 and practice is now ongoing, and had been for almost an hour or so.

Right after the pair had made their way to the gym Kageyama was unsurprisingly the next person to arrive, the boy being a little bitter Hinata arrived first. The other members soon filled in one after another some more lively than the rest.

Now the girl sat on the bench as the boys did their drills. Takeda-sensei couldn't make it to morning practice today as the school board was having a faculty meeting at this hour as well. So here she was inbetween Yachi and Kiyoko watching the boys practice.

Daichi had proposed a mini-game between the team and as soon as he said it the boys had already split into two seperate teams and started a rally as a way to conclude training.

Kageyama was extremely out of it during the game, his serves had less power in them and his tosses lacked accuracy (nothing the team would notice but still). 'Something doesn't feel right, was it the Mackerel this morning? no no no it couldn't be maybe it was because I wasn't able to wash my pair of favorite kneepads' he thought.

"Kegeyama!" Nishinoya had called signalling him that the ball was being passed to him so he had assumed a setting position, jumping he felt the ball fit perfectly in his fingers flicking his wrist he tossed it to the otherside of the court where Hinata was ready to swing.

'Crap, it's low' The boy thought as the ball had left his fingers watching at how the trajectory was down by atleast 18 degrees. Hinata was ready to spike, he felt the surge of adrenaline kick in as he stretched out his hand. He felt a jolt as the ball collide with his face instead of his palms. It all happened too fast for anyone to register, Hinata was soon found on the floor face first hurt, confused and ready to fight Kageyama.

"Hinata!" Daichi had shouted.

"A-are you okay?" Asahi asked as the whole team had circled around the boy who was still laying face flat on the floor.

"He's silent. . .

Ryuu do you think he's dead?!"

"I would be surprised if he wasn't" a certain megane snickered.

"Now now let's not jump to conclusions, Hinata are you alright?"

The boy groaned in reply refusing to sit up.

(Y/n) stood up from her spot and inspected the orange haired boy. The boy had an obvious red mark on his cheek and a growing spot by his forhead and nose, it was only a matter of time before it started bleeding.

Daichi sighed watching (Y/n) escort Hinaya towards the other managers he looked towarss his team, "looks like this is the end of our morning practice, In the mean time the rest of you can do cool down stretching individually and leave. Hinata would be taken to the nurse's office and Suga and I are going to the teacher's lounge to talk to Takeda-sensei about the new training schedule and updates on this mornings practice."

On the otherside of the gym (Y/n) stood by Yachi who was tending to Hinata who had his nose pinched with a tissue. Yamaguchi and Tsukishima stood a few ways from them snickering at the boy's predicament while Kageyama was silently sat next to Hinata.

"Ano, Hinata-kun I think it's best to go to the infirmary now, your nose is bleeding quite a lot." Yachi said scratching her cheek.

"A-ah you're right."

Noya bounces in with Tanaka and Ennoshita in tow, while Narita and Kinoshita finish up their stretching.

"I'm coming with you!" Noya declared, "I need to ice up and bandage my arms too, plus what kind of senpai would I be if I didn't accompany my kouhais to the infirmary." Noya said with an intense aura that nearly blinded Yachi that had left Tanaka laughing.

Kiyoko had volunteered to go to the Infirmary as well to request for a first aid kit as these accidents have been happening quite frequently these days. This had only caused Noya to sky rocket since he'd get to be within a foot radius with his beloved Kiyoko-san.

Daichi, Asahi and Suga stood by the entrance looking over at the team. Suga let out a playful exhausted sigh watching at how loud and energetic Noya is even after morning practice. The boy was laughing with his arms spread looking over a star strucked orange haired boy while Tanaka seemed to hype them up as well (Y/n) and Kageyama looked geniunly confused with Ennoshita face palming behind them. It was a sight to behold, truly it was.

"Sure is energetic, huh?" Daichi said.

"Well, I wouldn't put it pass him, he's always been lively." Asahi said meekly using a finger to scratch his cheek sweatdropping at the scene before him.

With his hands on his hips, lips twisting to the side, "Kinda envious actually, I feel like some old dude now especially when I'm with you slovenly bunch." Suga replied.

"Suga you aren't even old" Daichi said sighing at how dramatic the setter has been lately, ignoring his latter comment the trio exited the gym heading towards the teachers faculty. Hinata, Nishinoya, Yachi and Kiyoko left the gym as well to pay a visit to the infirmary not long after the trio.

7:23

The rest of the volleyball club still stayed by the gym, the door closed, shoes sqeaking and balls being hit could be heard from the gym. None of the boys even bothered to change out of their gym attire yet and class was about to start in an hour.

"Daichi and Suga aren't here right?" Narita asked picking a stray ball.

"Nope, they went to see Takeda-sensei, I'm sure they already left for class after." Ennoshita replied also taking a stray ball and placing it inside the cart.

"I don't think so, they left their bags here." Narita said using his chin to point at where their bags were, by the bleachers along with a few of their teammates belongings as well as a napping (Y/n).

7:30

The lights glowed dim and flickered this caused the group of males to stop their ministrations.

"Did the lights just go out for a second or was that just me?" Tanaka asked aloud.

"I bet it was nothing," Yamaguchi said dismissively, as he was about to practice another float serve the lights went out.

"Who turned out the lights"

"Shit"

"Is it a black out"

"Do you think something happened to the main building??"

Narita takes initiative to go towards the door to check, waning to see if they were the only ones affected from the cut off in electricity.

"Do any of you have flashlights"

"Use your phone"

"It honestly isnt really all that dark you guys are exaggerating"

Narita grabs onto the sliding handle and tugs at it, jerking it with a little more force but to no avail.

"Guys. . . we're locked in."

Kageyama's faced twisted as he ran over and started pulling at the sliding door hoping it would budge but after his actions proved to be uneffective he hit the door with a loud bang.

"Shit" he whispered.

The lights then started to flicker on and off, a loud alarm blaring from the intercom and announcement speakers outside. A wave of panic coursed through the students in the gym.

ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇɴᴄɪɴɢ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱɪʀᴇɴ, ᴀɴʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀʟʟ ᴄʀɪᴍᴇ, ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅɪɴɢ ᴍᴜʀᴅᴇʀ, ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ʟᴇɢᴀʟ ꜰᴏʀ 12 ᴄᴏɴᴛɪɴᴜᴏᴜꜱ ʜᴏᴜʀꜱ. ᴘᴏʟɪᴄᴇ, ꜰɪʀᴇ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴇᴍᴇʀɢᴇɴᴄʏ ᴍᴇᴅɪᴄᴀʟ ꜱᴇʀᴠɪᴄᴇꜱ ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴜɴᴀᴠᴀɪʟᴀʙʟᴇ ᴜɴᴛɪʟ ᴛᴏᴍᴏʀʀᴏᴡ ᴍᴏʀɴɪɴɢ ᴀᴛ 7 ᴀ.ᴍ., ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴜʀɢᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇꜱ. ʙʟᴇꜱꜱᴇᴅ ʙᴇ ᴏᴜʀ ɴᴇᴡ ꜰᴏᴜɴᴅɪɴɢ ꜰᴀᴛʜᴇʀꜱ ᴀɴᴅ, ᴀ ɴᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ʀᴇʙᴏʀɴ. ᴍᴀʏ ɢᴏᴅ ʙᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʟʟ."

"What the fuck"

Ḯ̸̡̡̨͙̹̞̟̞̃̊̎͆̔͗̚͝ť̴̢̢̫̭̙̞̱̆́̇̌̉̔́͝͝ ̶̺̊h̶̠̫͉̲̘̔̅̑͛͠ͅͅả̷̢̳͚̦̽̓͒̃̾̋̈́͜s̵͙̱͙͒͆ͅͅ ̵̧̝̭̫̟̫̝̎̈́͆̈́̑̕͠͝͝ḇ̶̙̄̌͝e̶̦͘g̵̛̟̖̉̀̋̄͜ụ̵̡͖̘̹̖̘͔̆̀̆̂̓̊̒͛n̷̨̪̆̅͒̇͛͆͝

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