#ive only really interacted with the guy a handful of times but he seems really nice and chill | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stxrvel · 4 months

Text

i don't wanna live forever (1)

summary: reader couldn't stop having deaths in her life ever since the Supersoldier serum came into her life. no matter how hard she tried to stay sane, it seemed that life didn't want to give her a break. until, one afternoon, she learned that one of her old friends was alive… (you guys know im bad at summaries, but please give this one a chance)

pairing: bucky barnes x f!reader

words: +4.5k

warnings: angst, major character deaths, canon deaths¿?, bad words, english is not my first language! thoughts of revenge and death, this is like an introductory chapter, so the buckyxreader interaction is low, but it'll get better, i promise!

note: holy fuck guys. i just spent like five hours writing and editing this and i fucking love it. its been a while since ive been this proud of a work, im actually scare the emotion will disappear, but i really want to rejoice in this one. i wanted to write something a little different from my usuals, maybe a little common in the fanfiction world, but i started and i simply could not stop (or maybe just approach this bucky fic from another perspective). so this is the first part and i'll try with all my heart to keep this going because it was fucking insane, at least for me. i really hope you all like this as much as i do! feel free to leave any comment! thanks always for all the support!! see you next time <3

part 2 ; part 3 ; part 4

When you went into the Supersoldier serum project with Steve, you thought you were going to change the world. Of course, at that time when technology was relatively new any invention felt like the beginning of a new era. That's how it was all sold to you and it was how you expected everything to turn out… Until you realized that it was all really a waste of effort and time.

They were just propaganda for war. Not to stop it, to promote it. To motivate it.

You tried, on several occasions, not to think too much about it. You tried to stay out of it as Steve sometimes asked you to, even though even he didn't want to, as Bucky asked you to when you lay on his shoulder to cry in the little time you had free between trips. It was a great burden of guilt and helplessness.

Until you and Steve, with the almost imposed help of Peggy and Howard, rescued Bucky from the evil hands of Johann Schmidt and his nefarious organization, HYDRA, that, unbeknownst to you, would haunt you for a long time to come. It was only after that, after spending several sleepless days on edge thinking about what might be happening to Bucky, that you and Steve were finally able to go out and contribute something. Destroy HYDRA and the Red Skull's plans.

Of course, you realized that not everything could go right when, the one mission you couldn't attend, Bucky didn't return. And then Steve didn't come back either.

“Do you think this will ever end?” you had asked Bucky the day before his last mission.

“Of course it will,” he had answered without hesitation, moonlight illuminating his clear eyes, squeezing your hand as if it was all he wanted to do for the rest of his life. “And after that we can begin to live as it should be.”

But there was no after that, because you never recovered from losing him. From losing them both.

“Are you okay?” Peggy approached, in the middle of the afternoon when the sun was streaming through the stained glass windows of the church, illuminating the spot where Steve's empty coffin had been, because they didn't even find his body. They didn't even think there was any of it left.

You barely moved your head to acknowledge her presence, moving the prayer slip they had recited throughout the mass between your hands. Your eyes were crystallized, in tears that no longer even made the effort to flow, because you had already spent too many days and nights crying. Peggy had been on the other side of the church, sitting next to Howard while the priest spoke, because you had refused to be near them in those moments. You didn't want to be near them.

“As well as one can be,” you slurred, finding that it had been a long time since you'd last used your voice for anything other than cursing and crying disconsolately.

The people had already left, probably an hour or more ago. The empty coffin had already been brought out, all the flower arrangements had been picked up, and the priest was preparing for the evening mass. You knew you had to leave, you knew Peggy and Howard were there waiting for you, but you felt stuck at that moment. You didn't want to leave, you didn't want to get ahead, you didn't want that life if it had to be this cruel.

You heard Peggy's sigh, before she took a seat next to you, a short distance away, averting her gaze to look at Christ on the cross.

You didn't know if you were selfish to be so closed off to your friends at this moments, because they must be grieving as much as you were, but you didn't know how to deal with the future possibilities. Bucky and Steve, great men and soldiers, one even with enhanced abilities, had not been able to make it through the punishment of war. What if Peggy and Howard were the same? What if they too had the cruel fate of dying at the hands of injustice? Could you deal with that? With everyone gone?

Maybe you could open up to them a little more because if not, who else? Turning away from them was not going to ensure their survival in this hate-filled society. Maybe you could protect them, like you couldn't protect Steve and Bucky. Maybe you could make a difference, because you had the chance to.

“You know,” Peggy spoke again, rearranging herself on the bench and crossing her legs, “Steve always knew this was how it would end.”

Her wistful, mournful, fragile voice sent a shiver through your body. Peggy didn't consider herself someone to show herself vulnerable in front of others no matter how close they were, even in those things that hurt her the most, in those things that affected her personally and made her eyes water instantly, she always tended to shut down. And at that moment you didn't dare interrupt her because you knew it would probably be the only time she would talk about Steve in a long time.

“Sometimes we'd talk, between tour trips, and he would tell me that wasn't what he wanted to do, even when he had to convince you otherwise,” her clasped hands would occasionally squeeze between words, blinking rapidly to fight back the tears. “He didn't know if he'd made the right decision.”

You could almost picture him, backstage at the foot of the stairs with that notebook he carried everywhere and wouldn't let go, Peggy at his side nostalgic, as helpless as the others. It reminded you of the times you'd had similar conversations with Bucky, desperate to find a purpose, a way through so much fog.

“The first time I saw him so sure of himself was when he asked us to help them look for Bucky,” she mumbled his name, as if trying not to scare you away by saying it too loudly. “Ever since then it seemed like he'd found that spark…”

“Until Bucky died,” you whispered, the words cutting through the cold and silence, Peggy shifting on the bench contritely.

“He lost something of himself from that day on, it wasn't hard to tell. The next time I heard him so sure after spending days lost, it was on that call from the plane.”

Peggy paused, raising her hand to cover her mouth as her voice faltered. You turned to look at her, wishing you could rip the pain from her soul and leave it in yours. She was trying to contain her emotions, breathing deeply, and in that moment you wondered what life might be like from now on, with the specter of grief following you around, waiting for the next time the dead knocked on your doors, unexpectedly, without allowing you to say goodbye.

“He had told me he wouldn't die in peace until he could get it all over with. And he took it all with him. And I hated him so much for it…” Peggy sobbed, her labored breathing standing out between words. She kept looking straight ahead at the stained glass windows, the expression on her face hard and scowling despite having tears rolling down her cheeks, as if she were trying to blame something for what had happened. Her reproachful eyes fixed on the Christ.

Her wails echoed through the walls of the church, the father on the dais sending them a look of sorrow. He had offered you water, thirty minutes after everyone at Steve's wake had left, when they kept walking, and you stood there.

Another empty casket.

“Ladies,” Howard's voice reached your ears amidst all the physical and emotional numbness. You could barely notice Peggy wiping under her eyes with the pocket square that was surely part of Howard's suit, as she took breaths to get up. “We should go now.”

You heard him walk, his slow, careful steps stopping just behind you. There, on his feet with his chest tight, he rested a hand on your shoulder and gave it a squeeze in support. He knew it was the most you would allow him at a time like this, deciding not to pass up the opportunity to let you know he was there. You sighed, feeling a heaviness take over your body as you stood up.

“Yeah, let's go.”

The next few months passed in a blur. Maybe too fast, maybe too slow, you weren't sure anymore.

Peggy continued to work at the Strategic Science Reserve for a couple of years, calling you from time to time to help her with some jobs. You kept a low profile, practically a fugitive from the state, while trying to live a halfway normal life in Europe. A lot of it thanks to Howard really.

Life had become a rather monotonous routine when you stopped getting so many calls from Peggy and Howard several years later. You knew they were fine, but not being able to return to the country filled you with anguish every day. And trying to lead a normal life became too complicated when you looked in the mirror and it seemed like not a single day had passed since you were in that capsule of Dr. Erskine's with Steve.

Until Peggy called one day asking you to come back. She told you that it was safe, that there would be no state officials waiting for you at the airport, but even if that had been the situation, you wouldn't have hesitated for a second to buy the first plane ticket and fly to see them again. To Howard and Peggy, to melt into an embrace, longing for the lost years.

You had thought that contributing to the fight in World War II had earned you a ticket to at least be recognized in the military, but all you gained was the government with their mad scientists looking for you to try to recreate the Supersoldier serum. Peggy didn't want to risk you and Howard gave you no choice by giving you a plane ticket to Finland with your bags packed.

You wasted many years not being by their side, unable to keep the promise you had made them in your head to be close by to protect them, to watch over their safety.

But when you left the airport there was only Peggy, and maybe that should've told you everything.

Her hair already looked gray, the effects of gravity and time present on her face. You hated to think that you shouldn't have looked any different from the way she saw you last time when she waved you off at that same airport. Her warm gaze was the same, raising her arms with held back tears to encircle you in a big hug. She tried hard not to sob against your shoulder, you felt the choppy movement of her breath against your chest.

She looked so different and the same at the same time.

You walked to her car a moment later, her trying to carry your suitcase and you telling her you were perfectly fine carrying it on your own. Amidst a smile, she walked into the driver's door and you frowned as you saw the empty passenger seat.

“Where's Howard?” you spoke as you sat down, after stowing the huge suitcase in the trunk of the car. The way you moved to buckle up, you didn't notice the way Peggy froze in place, her hands clenching the steering wheel so tightly that her breath hitched from the effort.

“We're going to see him,” was all she said, but she was very good at hiding that something was wrong. Only for a little while.

During the trip, even though you tried to ask things about them, about what they had been doing during this time, you didn't miss the way her shoulders were tense or her eyes very alert. Something bad had happened and Peggy was trying to hide it from you.

When she pulled up in front of a church, you already knew what had happened without her answering a single one of your questions.

Howard had died.

You two had sat next to Howard's son Tony, his spitting image, in complete silence as the prayers went on. At that moment you didn't know what had happened, hoping it had been a quiet and peaceful death, because you didn't know if you would be able to endure another violent death.

Peggy gave you all the details when the mass was over, after the coffin was taken away, and you hadn't felt such fury in so many years. Not since the deaths of Bucky and Steve had that adrenaline rush of anger returned to run through your body as violently as it did at that moment, when Peggy told you that he had been murdered along with his wife. All to steal some prototypes of Dr. Erskine's serum. The damned serums with which everything had started.

This time there was a body in the coffin, but there was also a culprit. Someone to point the finger at and take it out on for years of anguish and pain.

You were at Peggy's house, staying for a few days, when she told you that wasn't all.

Peggy had a suspicion that HYDRA hadn't disappeared when Steve crashed that plane into the ice. Her suspicions generated panic in you, because Bucky and Steve had died for that, now apparently Howard, only for it all to have been for nothing. The feeling of carnage that ran through your whole head made you nauseous, years of helplessness and pain pent up in such a small body had to find its way out somehow.

“It was a man, according to the information I've been able to gather,” Peggy spoke, taking a seat across from you in the dining room of her living room, after pouring you a glass of lemonade. “He didn't die from the crash. He had a concussion. He was hit in the head. His wife died from asphyxiation.”

“Does Tony know?”

“No,” Peggy shook her head quickly, one hand over her heart as if the mere thought caused her physical pain. “It didn't even occur to me to tell him something like that.”

“And he was looking for the serum,” you recalled, a bitter feeling planted in the back of your throat, the memories of the disastrous times during the war coming back into your head like a blinding flash.

“He took them. We don't know who he is or who he works for, but whoever they are, they must have been following us for a long time to know about them.”

“You mean years,” you arched an eyebrow, your fingers touching the cool exterior of the glass seeking some reassurance.

“Possibly. That project isn't recent,” Peggy nodded, drinking her lemonade with a grimace. You stared at the liquid almost finished from her glass, a wrinkle forming between your brows with each passing second and you kept wondering why.

“But what the fuck was going through that asshole's head?” you spat angrily. Rage at already the amount of lives that serum had taken with it and at Howard's recklessness. Rage at the reaper who seemed to be following in their footsteps for some reason, rage at that damn man and whoever his damn boss was.

“It was the only option, Y/N,” Peggy turned her gaze, meeting your eyes with a strange glint.

“What do you mean?” you were almost afraid to ask, your friend's gaze suddenly turning evasive. You watched her run her fingernails over the glass of the tumbler, lost for a moment in thought. The way her shoulders slumped forward in defeat caused a pressure in your chest that made it hard to breathe. Peggy shouldn't be going through these things at this point in life.

“Howard was working with the Pentagon, as a contractor or something. They had found you. Howard felt cornered and they made him sign an agreement.”

With your incredulous look on her face, Peggy didn't dare look back at you for a few seconds. So much had happened since you had left and it seemed that you had only been told about the things you weren't going to care about so much. But if you had known that you wouldn't have cared much about giving some of the state officials their comeuppance. You would've liked Howard to trust you enough to tell you, not live in as much fear behind his back as the last few years must've been. You didn't like the way Peggy's lips curved downward, as if she, too, would've preferred to make another decision had she known this was how it was going to end.

“Howard assured them that he could recreate the serum, and told them he would as long as they left you alone.”

“Fucking asshole…” you closed your eyes, scrubbing your face with your hands. The rough skin of your hands rubbed against the delicate skin of your face, years of combat and mistreatment foreseeing a harshness that reminded you every day of what you'd had to go through to get to that moment.

“I only found out about it after it happened. I didn't see it for like a whole week,” Peggy shook her head slightly, her eyes glistening in the pain of the memories. You shook your head hard, a more violent reaction than you could have anticipated.

“That stupid… stupid asshole! What the fuck made him think I couldn't defend myself?”

“He was trying to do the right thing,” Peggy finally searched your eyes, meeting the red rims that told her you were holding back too hard breaking in front of her, only using that pain mixed with rage to keep you sane.

“And look how that turned out!”

Peggy stretched her hand across the table, with a pleading look asking you to lower your voice, averting her gaze to the hallway. You followed her gaze, for a second forgetting where you were, forgetting that her family was with you behind the doors where you were plunged into darkness. It was past midnight.

You took a second to calm yourself, trying to drown out the uncontrolled emotions and taking deep breaths to calm your fluttering heart.

“And if what you theorize is true…” you regretted the moment those words left your mouth; you didn't even want to finish the sentence.

“Do you think it is?”

“I don't want to,” you shook your head instantly, closing your eyes, the thought sounding illogical inside your head. Your hands on your chest trying to contain the storm of feelings that was making chaos inside your head. “That would mean that everything we did, everything Bucky, Steve and Howard did and sacrificed, was in vain. It will all have been in vain.”

You spent several weeks with that thought in your head, working hand in hand with Peggy, and the organization you barely knew as SHIELD, to track down the whereabouts of the killer of Tony's parents and the one responsible because the Supersoldier's serums were, surely, in the wrong hands.

And yes, it was many years of fruitless missions and dead ends, with you running every field mission and Peggy calling the shots from the New York facility. Every time you felt close to discovering something, it seemed that the enemy rejoiced in your failures and still couldn't understand how they were always three steps ahead.

However, you had to leave the missions when Peggy became ill.

The silent, lethal Alzheimer's.

During the first months in the hospital, she still recognized you. She also recognized her husband and children. But after the first year, she frowned every time her children walked through the door. After a year and a half, her husband had to remind her that they had been married for about forty years.

After two years, she was still only remembering you, Howard, Steve and Bucky. Her whole life during her time in the army was all you talked about, sometimes you would tell her how much more time had passed than she remembered and always, without fail, she would ask you how much you had done in Europe for so long by yourself.

She cried every time she remembered Howard's death. She cried every time she remembered her children. Out of her mouth came a thousand apologies that no one would accept, because there was nothing anyone could do to prevent what had to happen. You wished she had been a serum test subject instead of you.

For several years, missions to find Tony's parents killer were sporadic because you spent more time around Peggy than at the SHIELD facility. She was the only thing you had left of everything you'd ever had, of when you held the world in your hands. She was the last thing keeping you tethered to that reality, keeping madness from flooding your reason. How could you have so many years ahead of you when that was all you had to live for? A life full of the dead, full of pain and suffering. What kind of karma were you paying for?

You were leaving the SHIELD facility, after another failed mission, when Nick Fury stopped you in front of the exit. You almost rolled your eyes right under his watchful gaze, tired of having to meet him anywhere, and exhausted from his comments about this vengeance project or whatever he wanted you to be a part of.

You still didn't know how, being such an exemplary agent, Coulson had fallen into his nets.

“Miss L/N,” the man stopped you with his words, his hands behind his back and a tense stance that caught your attention.

“Fury,” you nodded in his direction, hoping he'd be quick because you were running late for your weekly visit with Peggy. “Do you need anything?”

“I'd like you to come with me somewhere,” Fury approached tentatively, his one eye fixed on your wary expression, which shifted to boredom the moment you thought you knew what he wanted.

“If this is about that project, I've told you a thousand times-”

“No,” he interrupted you, moving forward and removing his hands from behind his back. “It's not related to that. I really want you to come with me.”

“You look agitated, but I need-”

“I'll take you to see Peggy myself after this.”

You didn't like that he knew your routine, even though you weren't doing enough to hide it from the other agents. But Fury looked nervous, even though he was hiding it very well, trying to keep his cool as he looked for ways to convince you.

You figured it wouldn't be a big deal for you to go off the deep end for once. After all, Peggy never remembered you were going to see her.

You set off in Fury's armored vans, not quite sure where you were going, but sure that it was urgent, because he had taken it upon himself to let his driver know that you had to get there as soon as possible.

You took that time on the trip to come up with a new strategy for the next mission because what you were doing up to that point wasn't working and you felt too close to throwing in the towel, figuratively speaking. You could spend years following a ghost, but you wouldn't give up on finding Howard and Maria's killer.

Before the car pulled up to one of SHIELD's secret sections, they passed the giant, imposing Stark Tower. You never saw Tony again after that time at his parents' funeral, not even during his visits to Peggy because you always made it a point not to cross him. You didn't think you'd be able to look him in the eye while you knew his parents had been killed without being able to tell him. You had promised Peggy in her lucid moments that you wouldn't tell him anything until you could find the culprit. You didn't want to initiate that pain if it had to be kept repressed, as yours once was, and probably still is. You had learned, some time after the funeral, that he was living with Edwin Jarvis, and you were glad to know that he would have good companionship to keep him company in such hard times.

Fury, a handful of agents and you entered the vans through the entrance to what appeared to be the parking lot of an old warehouse. Upon entering, the first thing you noticed was the number of armed agents that seemed to be guarding the place, not at all discreet to how SHIELD used to do things. You weren't sure if Peggy would authorize something like that, but you couldn't question the Director's decisions. It wasn't your place.

“What's going on here?” you frowned, watching as every meter there was another agent and another agent. You got out of the car without waiting for an answer from Fury, moving directly toward the entrance where most of the agents were concentrated. You barely noticed their looks in contradiction, running their eyes over you and then over the man trying to catch up to you, dubious as to whether or not they should move. “Move.”

“Wait,” Fury's voice stopped the command in the agents, who turned back to look at you as you sent Fury a confused look.

“What's all this mystery, Nicholas?” the man startled almost discreetly at your tone of voice, the agents stirring uncomfortably, but kept the serene expression that was getting on your nerves. “What the fuck did you do?”

“We got a call from the Arctic.”

“From the Arctic?”

You tried to ignore the way the hairs on your neck instantly stood up, your body alerting you to something your mind still couldn't comprehend. You felt like a deer face to face with a predator, expecting the worst.

“The Colonel informed us of something that might interest us,” Fury's cryptic voice echoed in your ears, drowning out the flicker of uncertainty vibrating from your head to your toes. “They found a plane.”

You didn't even answer him. Your heart began to pound wildly, cornered, ready to have your head bitten off. The tension in your shoulders intensified, with the involuntary movement of your hands as you broke into a cold sweat. The mere implication of his words caused an emptiness in your stomach, a sense of longing and fear you hadn't felt before.

You looked at Fury, trying to find in his gaze the gleam of a lie, but there was nothing there but assurance. There was nothing but recognition and understanding in his gaze, but that didn't make the emptiness in your stomach and the tight chest go away. It didn't make the feeling of being outside your body go away.

You barely remembered to move in the direction of the door, the agents instantly moving out of your way, pushing it so hard that one of them flew out. You moved your eyes around every corner of the room, the cream-colored walls generating a great repulsion in you. And there, in the midst of all the confusion and the storm, a confused and disgruntled face looked back at you. A face you never thought you would see again.

Steve Rogers was standing a few feet away from you, barely comprehending what was happening around him and instantly recognizing you. Your chest compressed once again, the tears you held back for so many years even in your loneliness making their own way into your eyes, endangering to end that mask you wore everywhere you went.

Steve was actually there, looking back at you with his eyes shining in recognition. You didn't know if he was as surprised as you were to react or you looked so bad that he didn't know if he should approach you or not. You just knew it was him, it really was him right there in front of you. He wasn't dead. Steve wasn't dead. He was alive. Ah, he was so alive.

The broken sob that suddenly left you was loud enough to make your friend shed his stupefaction and stride over to where you were. You barely managed to cover your face, between sobs, wails and disbelief, feeling your knees give out, surrendering to the weight of the pain, when his strong arms grabbed your shoulders before you hit the floor. Preventing your fall, as you had wished so many times before.

You cried against his shoulder, when feeling him against your body you knew there was no doubt it was true. You moved your hands away from your face, wrapping them around his waist as tightly and lovingly as you hadn't hugged anyone in so long. Surely the last time you hugged someone like that was when you saw Peggy on your way back from Europe.

Steve wasn't far behind, his arms around your shoulders just as tightly, his chin against the crown of your head, moving from side to side trying to hold back the loud sobs that shook your body.

You couldn't believe it, but it was true, he was right in front of you.

Steve was alive. He had come back to your side. You didn't even want to ask why.

And there was nothing else you could think about for the rest of your life.

#stxrvel talks #bucky barnes x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky fic #bucky x you #bucky fluff #bucky barnes angst #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky #james bucky buchanan barnes #winter soldier #the winter soldier #steve rogers

181 notes · View notes

ceilidho · 5 months

Note

god,,coworker johnny is so fucking good yo i like the fact that you made it clear that his peak weirdness comes out when only you can see it. the first two months with you working together being largely…cordial? no, maybe distant? maybe not in proximity (the guy is practically glued to you at all times), but it almost seemed like he only ever wanted you to see him in one certain way. framed and perfect and wanting. it just seemed, artificial, almost. that might be the word. even back then, you compared his interactions between you and your other coworkers, you could only barely understand that something was off. it was never like he was unfriendly to you, i mean, there were times he’d have casual diagreements with others, his voice dipping low with disapproval with a momentary frown. strangely, despite everything, it kinda relieves you, seeing that johnny can be so normal, but only ever sometimes, and never with you.

no, with you he’s almost too friendly. so friendly that it’s uncomfortable. only ever sweet, so sweet its bordering on sour. in a way, you were convinced that he was just being fake around you, at least before the whole “fleshlight incident”, but not now. not anymore.

its a real shame, because id imagine reader would really like johnny otherwise, as a true friend. he’s sincerely so fun and endearing to everyone else he comes across, you’ll sometimes find him in the break room conversing with a few of your other employees and he’s so genuinely funny and normal, even you tended to enjoy hearing his conversations with others in the background. but then he’ll realize you’re in the room and his eyes change. not just that, his whole posture morphs into something taut and tense; ready to pounce. it has you discreetly shrinking away, trying to get his searing gaze off of you. when it comes to you…theres an air of fevered wanting that only chokes you the more you breathe in.

lmao idk ive just had friendships in the past that were ruined by male horniness so im probably projecting a bit too much and u can ignore if i am but,,,personally im intrigued by the horror of knowing something potentially so meaningful and pure, something that seems to be easy for everyone else to have (true male friendship), has been effectively roadblocked because of lust. good and addicting in the moment but devastating in the long run like a cigarette 😭

HEHHEHEEHHE I’m reading this and rolling around on my bed and giggling, this is exactly the vibe. Poor reader because he really is such a fun guy to everyone else like people aren’t all WRONG in their opinion of him, he really is an excellent coworker. Good sport, funny guy; lends a hand whenever someone needs help. He helped Jeff move, drove Daryl to the airport, looked after Sonya’s cat while she was away.

but yeah :\\\ dude is severely compromised by lust when it comes to reader. Perverts all his good intentions, even before he comes out and says that he’s into her. Every single conversation is manufactured, artificial, kind of masked under his own delusional belief that they’re dating or whatever. He does genuinely like you, it’s just kind of buried down deep, not super important until you’re actually his.

155 notes · View notes

lu-is-not-ok · 11 months

Text

This fucking guy.

Anyway have some of my incoherent ramblings about this man under the read more because I have a lot to say about him.

Alright, let me split this into three sections because otherwise this ramble will be even more of a mess than it already is.

I'm gonna discuss Yi Sang in the mirror, or Sang Yi, under a couple of different lights.

One, how he relates to the concept of being the opposite reflection to Yi Sang. Two, how he ties back to Yi Sang's wife from "The Wings". And three, some of my thoughts about how he might fit into the wider scope of the plot and world of Limbus Company.

Strap in lads.

Sang Yi as a "left-handed" reflection

Something that becomes increasingly clear as we're shown interactions between Yi Sang and Sang Yi, and what is directly spelled out by the latter at the end of Canto IV's dungeon, is that Sang Yi is effectively the antithesis of much that makes Yi Sang, well... Yi Sang.

Yi Sang, at the core of everything, is a very sentimental and kind man. He cares a lot about the people around him, even if he doesn't always show it outwardly, and struggles to move on from whatever losses he experiences. Though he may claim otherwise, he's also constantly thinking about everything he's going through, which is what eventually leads him to the Mirror as a form of escapism from his curel reality.

Sang Yi on the other hand... is none of that.

Most of the 'comforting' words or advice Sang Yi offers to Yi Sang can be boiled down to "Stop caring or thinking about every little thing.", a sentiment that's directly in opposition of who Yi Sang is as a person.

Sang Yi finds the idea of feeling joy or despair over the past pointless. He thinks Yi Sang shouldn't feel guilty about his technology being used to exploit others because he already knew what he was getting himself into. He doesn't understand why Yi Sang would have trouble moving on if he were to lose Sang Yi.

Whereas Yi Sang is caring and emotionally-driven, Sang Yi is... I don't want to say uncaring, since he does seem to care about Yi Sang to some degree, but at the very least he is rather distant and logically-driven.

I think the moment that exemplifies that the most is when Yi Sang tells him Gubo doesn't care about him beyond using him as an accessory to prop himself up in the limelight, to which Sang Yi responds that it doesn't matter, that Yi Sang should use this as an opportunity to be in that limelight as well.

And, actually, speaking about that. Sang Yi doesn't really seem to think things through nearly as much as Yi Sang does. Or, at the very least, he doesn't care to look deeper than the surface level.

Sang Yi sees Gubo's attempts at connecting with Yi Sang as genuinely caring about him, whereas Yi Sang is able to see through them and realize Gubo is being entirely selfish here. Sang Yi sees the new League of Nine as something worth joining, while Yi Sang notices that it is nothing but a mockery of the old League. When Sang Yi learns of the new League's plan to destroy mirror worlds, his only reaction is that of mild curiosity without even a sign of concern.

All that being said, the biggest example of this might just be the fact that Sang Yi did not even realize just how badly Yi Sang was feeling until Yi Sang straight up told him there was nothing left for him in this world outside of Sang Yi.

Though we can't know for sure what exactly Sang Yi was feeling at the time, as all that we know about him is colored by Yi Sang's own bias towards him, I think it's fair to say that was the moment where it finally hit Sang Yi just how badly he fucked up by keeping Yi Sang stuck there all to himself.

Which, now that I think about it, transitions nicely to the other angle I want to look at.

Sang Yi as Yeongsim / Yi Sang's wife

First of all, just to lay it out there in the open, as fucking hilarious out of context as it sounds to say Yi Sang was his own wife all along, it's... actually not all that far off.

Beyond the fact that the Mirror is directly named after his wife in "The Wings", there's some other obvious signs that point to it. If you were to take the letters Yi Sang was writing to Sang Yi out of context, you could absolutely mistake them for something one would write to a lover too far away to be easily reachable. Plus, the way Yi Sang's first reaction to seeing Sang Yi is to call him "beautiful" in his mind?

Yeah, there's something to that.

And, of course, there's something to be said about the similarities between Sang Yi's role in Yi Sang's life, and the role Yi Sang's wife played in "The Wings".

That being the way both of them end up isolating Yi Sang, how both of them actively withhold information from him, and how Yi Sang sees them as perfect and without a fault even as they're hurting him.

I don't feel like talking about "The Wings" in depth right now as it's almost 5 am and I want to actually finish writing this fucking post at some point, but if you want to know what I'm comparing Sang Yi to, it's a short read that's easy to find a free pdf online for.

The fact that Sang Yi was trying to keep Yi Sang inside is probably the most spelled out one out of everything I'm talking about in this post. Not only does Sang Yi directly tell Yi Sang to stay with him (mind you he doesn't even ask), but Ishmael, as an outside observer, notes how Sang Yi was trying to keep Yi Sang in the room by making him afraid of the outside.

Actually, looking at when he finally offers Yi Sang the choice to leave, it's in a... very interesting way, shall we say?

Not only does Sang Yi try to make the option of staying sound as appealing as possible by bringing up that Yi Sang will be able to continue doing what he loves (or at least what Sang Yi believes Yi Sang loves), like continue working on the Mirror and keep talking to him.

On the other hand, Sang Yi is reluctant to even bring up the option that Yi Sang can leave, and when Yi Sang shows interest (note that Yi Sang's immediate reaction isn't a "I don't want to leave", it's a "I don't think I can leave"), he continues to make the option sound as unappealing as possible, while still making it clear that it is possible.

How Yi Sang doesn't need to be able to fly to leave, but he will struggle endlessly if he does. How Yi Sang can eventually find somewhere to call his home, but he will have to walk until his feet hurt and will have to settle for wherever or whatever he ends up resting at.

I don't know about you, but that doesn't seem like the kind of encouragement or advice someone who had a person's best interest in mind would make.

Now, let's make some other facts clear while we're at it.

Sang Yi knew that Yi Sang had wings as well, after all, he calls that fact 'obvious' when he finally mentions it. However, he never directly told him he does, even as Yi Sang lamented to him about how (in his eyes) he himself had no wings. He only brings it up when Yi Sang is truly at his lowest.

Sang Yi knew what the effects of supplements Yi Sang was taking were, as he can tell exactly what will happen if Yi Sang stops taking them, or takes several at once. However, he never directly told him this until he gives Yi Sang a choice, even though he was clearly aware they were not beneficial.

Sang Yi knew that Yi Sang's room was always open, as he was confident that Yi Sang would be able to just leave on his own once the effects of the supplements cleared away. However, he never tells Yi Sang that, even when Yi Sang is making it clear he doesn't think he even can leave. It's actually one of the thing Yi Sang ends up finding out by himself.

Despite all of this... Yi Sang never stops to consider that Sang Yi might not have his best interests in mind. Sang Yi is his everything. He's perfect, flawless, the ideal self. He's the only thing Yi Sang has left.

Call me cynical, but it paints the ending of the Canto in a somewhat bittersweet light to me. After all, Sang Yi never has to apologize or even admit to anything, and Yi Sang still views him as positively as he always has.

I guess at the very least it's accurate to the book. After all, Yi Sang in "The Wings" ends up holding on to that perfect image of his wife to the very end.

Sang Yi as an entity

Okay I have no clever transition here like I did last time, but this is probably the thing about Sang Yi that's been bugging me the most.

Have you guys noticed just how much Sang Yi seems to know about Yi Sangs from different worlds? Those sweeping general statements about "All versions of Yi Sang" or "All Yi Sangs" that he makes with full confidence.

When Yi Sang assumes that Sang Yi can "be anywhere he wants" thanks to his wings, just how correct is he?

With the way Sang Yi talks about other Yi Sangs, it gives the impression that he's met a lot of them in the past. In fact, if that's true, it would recolor the meaning of Sang Yi's comment about his meeting with his particular Yi Sang "peculiar".

What's so peculiar about our Yi Sang specifically, if Sang Yi has met so many of them? Is it the method, the fact that it's through the mirror? Is it that Sang Yi finally found a Yi Sang that also had wings? Is it because our Yi Sang is the first one to contact him rather than the other way around?

And while we're on that topic, isn't the way Sang Yi talks about Yi Sangs kind of odd? It's always "All Yi Sangs" or "All versions of Yi Sang", as if he's not part of those Yi Sangs himself. It's like he's putting himself in the role of an outside observer, seperate from the concept of being a 'Yi Sang'.

Just what is Sang Yi, really? He implies he's the version of our Yi Sang that's inside the mirror, the one that "needs to be opposite, yet is quite alike" to the one outside, to explain why our Yi Sang would have wings if he saw them on Sang Yi, but like... He never directly says that's the case.

In fact, when Yi Sang asks Sang Yi about what the outside is like, Sang Yi weirdly dodges the question, saying it's all "the same tiring stuff". Another example of him withholding information aside, this all makes him seem rather fucking suspicious to me.

Just. What is he really?

God I hope we get to see him again, cause I really want to know what the fuck his actual deal is.

#limbus company #limbus company project moon #lcb spoilers #lcb canto iv #lcb season 2 #lcb analysis #sang yi #sang yi lcb #mirror yi sang #eye strain #my art #lu speaketh #i want to put this man in a petri dish and study him under a microscope

382 notes · View notes

sxtvrns · 1 year

Text

publicly romantic

🎶 now playing: in my heart (demo) - grentperez

P: Lee Felix x Fem!Reader

S: He fell first, and he fell hard. When you were on the big screen behind him, he knew he fell for you even more.

W: fluff, drabble because im in my kpop era now, no knowledge of skz at all, short

N: if im being honest guys the only reason i decided to write this was because i got inspired by those fan dance things during their world tour ive only ever listened to case 143 and i apologize if this makes me an outsider but i thought this was cute okay enjoy the content

please interact if you enjoy!

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

When your boyfriend said he was going on a world tour, you did not think it was going to last for nearly an entire year. JYP better give them a break after this.

Dating Felix was a handful. He was always busy and his schedule was packed, you both were travelling constantly, having a home in Sydney and in Seoul. With the tour on his hands as well, it didn’t make it any easier. You saw all the edits of him flooding the internet, all of them reminding you of how much you missed your boyfriend.

So when you were told he was going to Australia, and you were conveniently going to be there at the same time as his concert, you had your fingers crossed you could get tickets. You didn’t care if you were in the pit or in the nosebleeds; you were happy to even be in the same room as him for a little while, even if you had to admire him from afar.

You texted him and called him as much as you could. Whenever your phone rang, you always assumed he was on a break or had free time, knowing that it probably meant the rest of the day was full of work. The amount of people that love him reminds you of how lucky you are to have such a handsome guy who seems so out of reach be your boyfriend.

Things weren’t kept secret for long. When you visited Felix one time, he forgot he was live, saying your name and three forbidden words out loud and straight to the camera: I love you. You never showed your face that live, your hand merely waving hello. It wasn’t until you left the room that both of you had realized what he’d done.

You came into his room after he finished his live, putting his phone away. “What the fuck did you do.” You say, more of a statement rather than a question. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to– it just slipped out!”

“If I knew you were going live, I wouldn’t have come. You slip up easily whenever I’m around.”

“That’s because I love you. And that’s also exactly why I didn’t tell you because I wanted to see you.”

You pace around the room, panicking. “JYP’s gonna kill us. He’s gonna kill you. Your fans are gonna come and kill me!”

“He already knows.”

“What do you mean, ‘he knows’?”

“Chan accidentally ran his mouth. If anything, you wouldn’t be in my room right now if JYP forced me to break up with you. He just told me to be careful… and I do. Ever since we started dating, I’ve been careful.” He sighs, setting his phone down and walking up to you. “I’m sorry. I… you can stay here for a few days if you’re too scared to go outside.”

He knew that people could find what you look like and all your other information with a mere search of your name. This wasn’t the same as other people knowing who his sisters were. Him getting into a dating scandal would jeopardize your safety and his group. He didn’t care about his group at the moment, he was scared for you.

“I… I’d like that, actually. I hope you don’t mind.”

“I assume that means you don’t mind sharing a bed? Unless you want me to sleep on the floor.”

“You really think I want you to sleep on the floor after the amount of time we’ve been apart?” Your response makes him smile, pressing a kiss to your forehead and pulling you in for a hug, his hand caressing the top of your head. “I’m really sorry. I know I messed up. And I’m sorry I can’t be there for you all the time.”

“I know. It’s okay. You’re doing your best, and that’s enough. I know you’re working hard and you’re busy. But… I’m hoping we can still try to enjoy ourselves for the time being.”

He pulls away to look at your face, being confused about your sudden switch up.

“Yes, I’m scared, yes, my life is probably going to be in danger at some point, but I did not come to see you just to worry about this and our relationship going public. It’s out there now, and there’s nothing we can do about it. I know I was panicking about it a few seconds ago, but I’ve come to terms that it happened already. I forgive you. And honestly, I’m glad that you’re that comfortable with me to say it in front of thousands of people.”

“I’m sorry–“

“You’ve apologized enough. It’s okay now.” You cut him off, going onto your tip toes to kiss his nose. “Can we order something? I’m hungry.”

“You didn’t think of doing that before my live ended?”

“I was gonna ask you, but I felt I intruded already.”

After that whole fiasco, people found your social media accounts, some of them even following you, flooding your comments with nothing but sentences that had the name Felix in it at least once. You got a few death threats even, but you tried to not let it get to you too much. It made you a bit paranoid, but the more you went out, the more you forgot about them.

Articles were written; Tiktoks and edits took over your feed about the ‘mystery girl’ or ‘Y/N’ behind the camera that gave Felix heart eyes whenever he looked at you. Eventually, they found out what you looked like, and though you were expecting insults, you were instead given compliments.

Pretty, adorable, beautiful… words that made you feel comfortable to be a part of Felix’s life publicly. He never brought it up during conversations or interviews unless another person did, which, he was very cautious with what he was saying.

You had your fair share of hate. It bothered you a little bit, but then remembered the only reason they hated you was that you had something they didn’t: Felix. His love and affection, his admiration and attention. It boosted your ego unhealthily, but you weren’t gonna get all full of yourself over it.

He wasn’t necessarily open about his relationship. He wouldn’t bring up the topic himself; usually someone else would have to. He would answer any questions, but there was always a limit to them. He was all nice about it though, always asking you after if what he said was okay to share with others.

“‘How’s Y/N?’ She’s good. She’s actually visiting, so I hope I’m not too loud.”

“‘How did you two meet?’ She does camerawork and paid us a visit, shadowing someone else. She always came along for a few shoots in a row, but I didn’t want to miss the opportunity so I just asked when no one was looking.”

“You wanna see her? She’s not too comfortable on camera, so I don’t think–“

“Felix, do you want this?”

You look at his tripod set up, then his surprised expression, as if he’d seen a ghost. “What’s wrong? Am I interrupting?”

“Nothing. What is that?”

“It’s a grilled cheese. I put the last of your gochujang in the butter.”

“Ah, thanks, we needed to get rid of it somehow.” You eye the camera. “Your face isn’t showing.” He clarifies, allowing you to walk into frame, letting him take a bite of the sandwich. His eyes light up, enthusiastically nodding. “It’s good!”

“Do you want it? I’ll make another one for myself.” He nods, taking the plate from you. “Thank you!” He says, mouth full as you walk out the door. “Look at this, guys. You guys summoned her, now I get good food.” He bites into it again, visibly enjoying the simple sandwich you made. “I love my girlfriend.”

The clip went viral. It’s now one of Felix’s iconic moments, and the first of your own.

You two were certainly romantic, private and in public. On the occasion you’d post photos of the two of you together, and you were also open about it if you were to do lives together. You weren’t in every live, but he invited you once and it was fun, so you were open to other opportunities.

You kept your hood on, which hid your face a bit well enough on camera.

“Y/N, what are we making?”

“Rose tteokbokki.”

“If you don’t know already, my girlfriend is an amazing cook and she gives me food sometimes during some of my other lives.”

“Then Felix makes brownies after and it’s a full meal.”

He notices your amount of clothing, greater than his. “Why are you wearing your hoodie? Is it not warm?”

“I’m hiding myself, I’m scared.”

“There’s nothing to be afraid of when you’re so pretty.”

“I cannot believe you’re flirting with me in front of over a hundred thousand people.”

“They deserve to know.”

His hand rests atop your head, his fingers gently gripping the hood. You let him take it off, fixing your hair right after. “Isn’t she pretty?” He shows you off to the camera before you hide your face in his chest.

You sat in an innocent little bubble tea shop, scrolling on your phone when you get a call from him unexpectedly. “Hello?” You greet, sipping on your drink. “Y/N, do you wanna come backstage after the concert? Feels like it’s been forever since I’ve last seen you.”

“Probably because it has. Can you really do that?”

“Chan’s parents and siblings are coming, and they’re going backstage, my sisters are coming too.”

“I mean, I’d like to, if it’s possible.”

He chuckles. “I’ll see you there.”

“Love you.”

There’s a brief pause, and you think about hanging up.

“Love you too.” He mutters, ending the call. It wasn’t very ‘professional’ of him to be calling his girlfriend when he should have been out there practicing, but he’s been kept from you long enough. He just couldn’t help himself.

And besides, he’d do anything for you.

As if it were a coincidence, it turned out you were sitting next to Hannah, who greeted you with a hug when she saw you sit down in the seat beside hers. Now you were sitting in your nosebleed seat, eagerly leaning forward to stare at the screen, the sudden random play dance coming on.

From your knowledge, a camera would focus on a certain fan in the audience, mostly in the further back, said fan having to follow one of the boy group’s dances. This would usually come on mid performance, meaning the members would be watching as well.

You’re so engaged staring at the screen, excited to see who’s on next that you don’t realize that it’s you. “Y/N!” Chan says, looking over at Felix. The choreography for God’s Menu begins to play as Hannah forces you up onto your feet, cheering you on.

You hand her your lightstick and place your bag down, forcing yourself to get over it and just do the dance for the few seconds you’re on screen. In your opinion, you did pretty well, judging from the screams that erupted from every inch of the room. You do the ending fairy, leaning against the railing again with a hand under your chin, sending a wink and a flying kiss across the arena. You immediately get shy, hiding your face in Hannah’s shoulder.

“Wow.” Felix starts, feeling Chan pat his back. “That’s my girlfriend, everyone.” He points in your direction, the arena flooded with screams as Felix’s ears and face slowly go red on the screen. You feel your own face heat up as you cover it, Hannah shaking you uncontrollably. “He’s blushing!” Han teases, pointing at your boyfriend’s crimson face. “C’mon, man, say something to her!” Chan says, ushering him closer to the edge of the stage.

“Y/N, I love you!” He holds a finger heart up, sending a flying kiss back to you. Your face goes warm at his bold move, yet you feel pride that he’s comfortable to do that openly in an arena full of his screaming fans. “Don’t cover your smile, you’re beautiful.” The screams somehow get even louder, and you feel as though a million eyes are on you as you wave your lightstick gleefully.

“Aww, so sweet!” Seungmin adds, poking at Felix’s open affection.

“Do you guys wanna know what Felix does? He scrolls through her photos sometimes before practice and he comes back all red. His excuse was that warm up was tough on him.” Chan exposes, though isn’t immediately stopped by his friend. You laugh at the thought, it being heartwarming at the same time.

You wait with Hannah, her parents, and Felix’s family after the concert, seeing Chan walk out first and greet his family, then you. “Felix ‘s coming, just grabbing something.” You nod, letting him reunite with his family for the time being. You smile at his feuding with his sister, feeling a tap on your shoulder.

Felix is standing right behind you with the biggest smile you’ve ever seen, and you practically jump into his arms. “Geez, I’m so sorry, I smell so bad.” His sweat makes your hands cling to him, yet when you look at his face, it made him all the more attractive. Still smelly, but somehow sexy at the same time. He had a towel on his shoulder, wiping his sweat off as best he could. He pulls away to greet his mom and his sisters, taking their pictures for them. You watched in awe how sweet their connection was and how close they were.

You overheard his mom talking to him before they left. “Treat her good, okay? You don’t want to lose her.” Your heart melts, now aware you’ve truly earned his mother’s approval. He walks over to you, stopping to simply admire you, his hand tucking your hair behind your ear.

“My god, you’re beautiful. I’ve missed you so much.” He mutters, the words making you blush and jump onto him for a long awaited kiss. One of those long, cheesy movie kisses was a way to describe it, but who cares if it was cheesy, you finally got to kiss him after months of being away from each other. “Loved your dance, by the way. When’d you get the time to learn that?”

“Circumstances. Figured it’d be best to be prepared.”

“You did fuckin’ amazing, then.” His hand covers his mouth, eyes widened in shock. “I didn’t mean to say that.”

“You aren’t live anymore, it’s fine.”

“Still felt wrong.”

“Do you guys want me to take a picture of you?” Hannah appears out of nowhere, startling you. You nod, handing her your phone, posing for a couple pictures, feeling Felix’s hand on your hip the entire time. “Alright, now kiss!” Hannah says jokingly, Chan shoving her shoulder.

“Seriously–“ You get cut off by Felix’s lips on yours, smiling into the kiss. Hannah eagerly takes photos, even when he pulls away, simply staring into your eyes as if he could see a whole world behind them. “Can you post that?” He asks, his lips curling into a smirk.

“Am I allowed to?”

“I’m the one that asked.”

That was a yes.

When Hannah hands your phone back to you after scrolling through the photos, she says, “You know I was joking, right?” You huff with a smile, staring at the photo of the two of you kissing. “If Felix was given a chance to kiss me, he would do it in a heartbeat, no questions asked.”

missed this goofball <3 love you always and forever, lixie (ps i love ur abs)

YALL R SO CUTE

AWWWW

i want this SO BAD you dont understand

that should be me

SHE IS SO PRETTY

tbh felix same id fold too

HAHAHA CAPTION IS SO REAL

“Have you been doing that for every show?” You ask, Felix running his fingers through your hair. “Doing what?” His eyes dart from your eyes to your lips and back. “Showing your abs. Lifting your shirt up and shit.”

He chuckles, his smile so pure talking about such a suggestive topic. “Yeah, why?”

“You’re telling me if I went to your Korea concert, I would have seen your abs there too?”

“You can see my abs anytime, Y/N.”

“I can?”

“You’re my girlfriend, of course you can.”

“Well, I don’t see you enough to see them that often but–“ When you turn back, his shirt is lifted up, showing them off in the middle of a Sydney sidewalk at an ungodly hour in the morning. You yank his shirt back down, Felix laughing almost too loud. “How indecent of you.”

“If indecent is what it takes to make your face like that, I’ll be it all the time.”

“Shut up.”

“You know you like it.”

“Maybe I do, so what?” You turn your face away from him, feeling his fingers rest under your chin to face you towards him again. “So… show me that you like it.”

“Felix, I am not having sex with you in the middle of the sidewalk at one in the morning.”

“So you’d have sex with me if we weren’t on the sidewalk?”

“I don’t think I can even have sex with you. At all.”

“Who’s stopping us?”

“Your fans. Your company.”

“They don’t have to know.”

“‘lix–“

“I know, I know. I’m just joking. Maybe when this whole idol thing is over.”

“It’ll be a while, then.”

“Hope you’re still in love with me by the time I’m 30.”

“I’ll always be in love with you, ‘lix.”

“Really?” He stops in front of you. “Really.”

“You promise?” He holds out his pinkie finger. You hook your own with his. “Promise.”

And he kisses you. Again, and again, and again.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

i wanna be where you are; feel so close though you’re so far, you’re my girl. 🎧

#lee felix #lee felix x reader #skz felix #felix x reader #stray kids #stray kids felix #felix drabbles #felix blurbs #skz x reader #skz fluff #fanfiction #sorry if this is bad

333 notes · View notes

chazzadotcom · 2 years

Note

if you write for euphoria could you do jealous maddy perez?

if not it can be any character

a/n YES ABSOLUTELY! ive not seen all of euphoria so it may not be 100% accurate, but i tried, you also didn’t mention what gender you wanted the reader so i went w male, let me know if you want it changed :)

Maddy Perez x Male reader :)

I don’t care

You and Maddy were not official, that was decided as soon as you first got together a few months back, however sometimes Maddy seemed to forget that, tonight being one of those nights.

You and Fez were at the party selling to everyone, it was quite chill and you were able to just have some fun for once.

You were walking over to the kitchen to get another drink when someone walked in front of you.

Cassie.

You’d sold to Cassie a couple of times, but she wasn’t really your vibe, there was just something off about her that you didn’t like, and chose not to interact with, but when it came down to business, you couldn’t really decline.

“He y/n” She smiled as she touched the top of your arm, slowly dragging it down before putting her arm back to her side. You raised an eyebrow, “what do you need Cassie?” You wanted to get this over with, you felt eyes burning into the back of your head, you knew you had more important things to do than make mindless small talk with Cassie.

“Oh nothing I just wanted to come over and say hi” she giggled as she looked into your eyes, it felt like she was staring right into your soul, but not in the way Maddy did it, when Maddy looked at you it felt like you were the only guy in the room, it felt like you were her entire world. When Cassie stared into your eyes you felt like a piece of meat, or a statue she wanted to collect and add to her collection of guys she’s fucked, you weren’t interested in being one of them.

“Well hi then Cassie” you stated bluntly as you tried to push past her, she put her hand on your chest to stop you from moving and laughed “you’re so funny y/n” you could see right through what she was doing, you rolled your eyes and finally got past her when another hand gripped your arm, you spun round to see the seething face of Maddy, and you looked confused, she started walking away, and you wordlessly followed her, confused on what was happening.

She took you to the bathroom and as soon as she shut and locked the door she ripped into you “what the fuck was that y/n?” you could tell she wasn’t impressed but, she also couldn’t be mad, she knew what she signed up for when you two first got together, she agreed and didn’t want it to go further, this was exactly what she wanted, why was she making such a big deal out of it?

You sat on the toilet and took out your rolling papers and some weed and started rolling a blunt, if Maddy was going to go full Maddy on you, then you needed to not be sober.

You looked up as you were licking the blunt closed, and the angry look in her eye got replaced by something else, as she sighed. You could see the switch in Maddy, you just wasn’t quite sure what was to come next.

She walked over to you as you put the joint in your mouth and lit it, she straddled your lap slung her arms around your neck and stared into your eyes. You’ve always felt something for Maddy, you knew that, I mean look at her, who wouldn’t, but you didn’t want to be the one to say that, not after everything that had happened with Nate, she needed to come to you first.

“I think I want to change our agreement.” you hummed as if you were contemplating it, when inside you were so nervous she was going to break it off completely.

“I think I want us to be exclusive, I don’t want to be with anyone else.” You coughed on the inhale of smoke you’d just taken in, that was so uncharacteristic of her, that you questioned if Maddy was the one sat on your lap. “You know what Maddy.” She was searching your face to try and see what you were thinking.

“I think that’s a great idea” you said before placing your lips against hers, you two had done this so many times but it felt new, it felt different, it felt right.

#euphoria #euphoria x reader #euphoria x male reader #male reader #maddy perez #maddy perez x reader #maddy perez x male reader #cassie #cassie euphoria #maddy euphoria

1K notes · View notes

moonchildstyles · 11 months

Text

fic announcement and sneak peek!

hiiiii besties!!!

I said a while back when I announced columba that I would be coming back with another series for both Tumblr and patreon this summer and that time has come :)))))))))))

for the last four years Ive had this idea in my head for a super special h that ive just let build a home in my heart that kept growing and growing and growing! now ive finally had a chance to write it all out and make him real with a fun story and lots of little details to make him who he is!

I don't want to spoil too much about him just because I want there to be a little mystery for him and theres so many fun details that I think will be really fun to put together when you dont' know what he's up to!

so, starting on June 30th, Rosemary will begin being posted with a new part every friday here on Tumblr! Patreon will be getting early access with the first part being posted on June 16th, and every friday after! an extended sneak peek is also up on my patreon rn!

If you are interested in reading the new story, please wait until June 1st to sign up so you only get charged once at the beginning of the month and theres a full 30 days before the next charge!

you can also check out the Pinterest board I made for the fic!

let me know if you guys have any questions about anything! im sooooo excited and cannot wait for you all to read!

under the cut is a sneak peek :)

—————

"Thank you, Harry!"

The bow girl's chirping gratitude only had Harry looking at her stiffly with a grumbled Yeah falling from his lips. Just as she had done the last couple of months since she made herself a presence during his shifts, she only gave him a smile before bouncing away with her basket only containing a carton of banana milk and her favorite cookies. She was no longer perturbed by the standoffish responses he gave her. Harry couldn't decide if he liked that or not.

It was like this at least a couple of times a week. She never did a big shop, only stopping by at the later times to pick up individual ingredients for a dinner she had chatted to him about, or little snacks she couldn't seem to go a day without. During at least one of her trips, she found an excuse to talk to Harry; she asked him about his day if she was close enough to feel comfortable starting a question (Harry never gave her a good answer, honestly), she told him about her own day and what she was shopping for if there was anything specific she had in mind. She almost always had a bow pinned her hair, fluttering behind her and matching whatever soft piece of clothing she had cinched around her form. Harry had even began fishing out a pack of her favorite cookies from his boxes if he was stocking that aisle, just to make it easy if she came in and asked him for assistance. It made the interactions quicker and less bothersome—at least that's what he told himself.

He knew more about her and her routines than he had any of the hundreds of people he'd met in the last handful of years since he started moving around. Even if that did make him feel a bit guilty knowing that she didn't have a clue about who exactly she was sharing these parts of herself with; she didn't know the mess she was tiptoeing around every time she interacted with him.

Tonight was no different, her leaving a rattling in Harry's bones that he wanted nothing more than to ignore like every other part of his life. If he was superstitious, he would think she could have cast some kind of spell on him with the way she and her little bows lingered in his brain long after she had checked out and gone on her way home.

That rattling followed him as he made his way into the backroom, his empty box needing to be replaced. An exasperated sigh fought to leave his chest when he saw almost half of the overnight team huddled in the area, puttering about as they chattered and pretended to work. He didn't like being roped into their conversations, and that almost always happened when he ran into more than two of them at once.

Harry didn't say a word as he broke down the cardboard box on his cart, pushing it off to the pile of the other flattened boxes before he reached for another. The conversations had quieted some when he walked in, but he could still hear what sounded like Brett and Fawn flirting in the back corner with a cart of refrigerated items that needed to go on the opposite end of the store, and Theo talking to two of the other guys that Harry didn't bother to remember their names.

"Busy night, huh, Harry?" Theo started, dropping whatever topic he had been rambling his friends about just a moment before.

"Yeah," Harry answered, voice stiff. It wasn't any more busy than any other night as far as he was concerned. Besides, he had other things he needed to worry about to be making conversation with a coworker he barely knew. There was still a pearl colored ribbon tying his stomach in tiny knots that he needed to fix.

Soon enough, a silence fell through the backroom when the others made their way out. Only Harry and Theo were left, Harry doing his part to semi-organize his chosen box before heading out on the floor again.

Maybe it was the rattling in his bones, or the vision of a peach colored bow that he saw every time he blinked, but something in Harry felt a little reckless when he peeked over at Theo focusing on his own box.

"That girl," Harry rumbled, feeling odd in his skin as he spoke, "The one with the bows in her hair... She comes in a lot."

Theo looked taken aback for a moment, his eyes wide with furrowed brows as he looked in Harry's direction. He even glanced over his shoulder as if there was anyone else there for the conversation to be aimed at. Harry had to keep from scoffing, dropping his gaze back to his working hands.

Floundering over his words, Theo tried to catch up once he realized Harry was voluntarily talking. "Um, the one with bows in her hair?"

Harry hummed in response. "She's in a couple of times a week."

"Ohhh," Theo sounded, familiarity touching his tone, "You mean (Y/N)?"

Harry swallowed at the sound of her name. He'd never asked for it himself. "If that's her name, yeah."

From the corner of his eye, Harry could see Theo nodding his head some. "She comes in a lot, yeah. She's not good at keeping a list and always forgets stuff if she tries to do big shops, so she just comes in when she wants something or runs out."

Though he didn't want this information to mean something to him, Harry felt a part of himself slowing being fulfilled the more details he learned. She didn't tell him these kinds of things when she rambled about her dinner choice for the night.

Keeping his gaze tacked to his hands, Harry kept his words measured and calculated. "Oh," he started, "Is she from here?"

"She's lived here forever, yeah. Why?"

A beat passed as Harry opted to ignore the second part of Theo's response. He didn't need to have any details as to why Harry was asking after someone after working together for five months with only a handful of interactions. Even if he did want to share that, Harry didn't have any answers to that why, anyway.

"Does she... What does she do?" Harry asked, the phrasing of his words feeling awkward falling out of his mouth. He was lucky he was so used to shielding his emotions and staying stoic, otherwise he would have cringed where he stood.

"Like for work?" Theo asked, his eyes warm on Harry's profile.

Lifting his shoulders, Harry only shrugged in response. It was probably a good idea to keep his mouth shut.

"She—uh—she works at the bakery. She and my sister work there together," Theo told him, acting as if Harry was supposed to know what bakery he was talking about and who his sister was. "(Y/N)'s pretty nice, though."

"Right," was all Harry offered by the time he finished organizing his box. He didn't bother to give anything more in response or wait for Theo to say more before he was walking out on the floor again. Even when he could feel his eyes stuck to his back.

No doubt would this interaction make its way to the rest of the team before the end of the shift.

It was harmless curiosity, Harry argued. He just had to believe the harmless part.

—————

#other #mine.#harry #harry styles #harry x reader #harry styles x reader #harry styles blurb #harry styles imagine #harry styles one shot #harry styles writing

266 notes · View notes

baby--b4t · 1 month

Text

Ive been thinking about baby Gaz a lot. He doesnt usually regress very young, but sometimes the poor guy just cant help it. He gets stressed too and needs someone to pamper and coddle him like he tries to do for his little siblings (Ghost and Soap).

I feel like Price would be the only one to ever really see Gaz regress that young. He would walk into his room to try and ask him a question but see a sobbing Kyle in a bundle of blankets instead.

"Hey, hey. Whats goin' on, kiddo?" Price would ask, not knowing how young he really was. It was only after he saw how limited Kyles speech and movements were that he would start to connect the dots. John would gently help Gaz sit up, supporting his body the entire way.

A lot of shushing and coos would be thrown Kyles way, trying to find some way to make the baby feel better. It was hard for Price to comfort Gaz in that moment because he didnt know what the trigger for this was. It felt like trying to comfort a wall.

Eventually, Price had gotten an idea. He carefully let Gaz lay back down before standing up.

"Ill be right back, yeah? Papas not leaving for long."

John decided to find one of the toys Soap liked to play with them he was feeling younger. It was made of plastic, something Price didnt exactly want to give Kyle since he seemed so young, but it made sounds and had interactive parts. He was sure this would distract Gaz.

Kyle became a mess all over again after Price left him. He didnt understand why Price had left and didnt like the loneliness sinking into him as his room fell silent. Upon the Captains return, he was met with a sobbing Gaz once again.

"Shh, shh, shh. C'mon now, Kyle. I told you I would come back. Theres no need for the waterworks."

A gentle thumb came across Gazs cheek, wiping away the tears.

"Look at what Papa found. Doesnt it look fun?" Price presented the toy to Gaz and showed him one of the interactive functions. A small sound played, a slide-whistle of sorts, and grabbed Kyles attention. He stared at the toy for a second before he whined again.

John pressed another button, this time a 'bonk' sound playing. Once again, it made Gaz stop crying. A small chuckle left Price as he began trying to help Gaz sit up and lean against him for support. He gently showed the little one he could play with it and make the sounds himself.

Gaz loved the toy. He messed with anything his hands would grab onto or push and seemed to cheer right up. He was still sniffling slightly, but he seemed to be more than content with the toy Price gave him.

#sfw interaction only #call of duty agere #cod agere

33 notes · View notes

dckweed · 2 years

Text

ugh you guys ok so ive been in such a pissy mood lately and im still on season two of stranger things and ok so remember when i said i was gonna do a billy hate fuck smut???? well this is it. you're welcome :)

also please feel free to request, i also added billy to the list of Stranger Things characters that can be requested!!

billy still ain't it bc i think he's a total dick but the part where he cried after that interaction with his dad had me feeling bad for him just a teeny bit. and also dacre is just godly for me. but i in no way simp for billy.

warnings: rough sex for sure, maybe some hair pulling, scratching, possible biting, idk if ill make it a nice ending or if ill make it like they definitely hate each other fr but this is your warning for either of those, maybe some bruising bc i feel like this is gonna be really really rough idk if im missing anything else but p much this is probably going to be pure word porn so if you're a MINOR DO NOT READ THIS!

anywhore, i give you:

'FUCK THE HATE AWAY' billy hargrove x female!reader

Look, you hadn't meant to end up in this position, in the middle of your families kitchen, at your breakfast table no less, riding the hell out of Billy fucking Hargrove of all people, but god, you honestly didn't have control of yourself at this point.

How did you even get here? No seriously, how the fuck did you get here? You thought really hard, completely ignoring the pain burning in your thighs from the way you were moving, it really was quite the workout. You thought back to earlier in the day, how Billy who was oddly enough in your home-ec class had ended up being your pairing for a project. You honestly couldnt help the eye roll when his name had been called with your own, he hung out with your brother quite a bit and you knew how he acted. You thought he was an asshole, a bully.

He didn't seem to have a problem with the pairing though, hell, he probably thought that you would do the whole thing for the both of them, which you honestly didn't mind because at least then it would be done right, but you were shocked when he told you to meet him at his car after you finished getting things from your locker. Your brother was at football that day, and you honestly didn't want to wait around for him, so you begrudgingly took the opportunity of the ride home.

"So, what exactly are your expectations?" You ask, getting into the passenger seat, the black leather warm on your thighs. It had been an oddly warm day for the fall, and the sun has been shining down on it all day. You look at him as he gets into the driver's seat.

"What do you mean?" He asks, already an annoyed tone to his voice, you could practically feel the eye roll come on. He threw the car into drive and reversed out of his spot before you even had your seat belt on.

"I mean, are you expecting me to do the work?" You ask, turning to face the front, you were surprised how well he knew the way to your house, he'd only been there a handful of times and it was easy to get lost in the neighborhood. "Because if so, I was already planning on it, you didn't have to drive me home just to tell me."

Billy scoffs. "I was already planning on driving you home, I owed your brother a favor." He says, his hands fidgeting for a cigarette. You were already on his damn nerves. God, you irritated him, you and your perfect fucking voice, and your perfect smile and your perfect attitude. He didn't understand how you could be so nice all the time. "And, for the record, I am capable of doing a project like this. How hard could it be?"

You sighed, knowing damn well you were in for a long, long afternoon. You really hoped he was more the stand back and observe type, although to your disappointment, he was completely hands on.

It didn't take long to get home, and you went upstairs to throw your bag in your room and take off your jacket, staying in your skirt and blouse. By the time you had gotten back down to the kitchen he had already shrugged off his leather coat and threw it onto your kitchen table, he was in the middle of rolling his sleeves up when he turned to look at you, long hair trailing down his back.

"So, where's the flour?"

For nearly two hours the two of you worked, nicely enough at first, although it slowly became tense as the pair of you were at your wits end with each other. Your need to be in control, and his carefree attitude weren't mixing well and you were quite frankly ready to beat him over the head with your mom's rolling pin.

You had just pulled your third attempt at your project out of the oven, the edges burnt completely black. It had stayed in for ten minutes too long, Billy having forgotten to turn on the timer. "Dammit, that was the last of the flour and cherries!" You say, completely exasperated and almost in tears. You really wish he had just let you do it.

Billy just looks at it shrugging. "Honestly I don't even know why you're panicking so hard about it, it's not like we don't have the whole weekend to get it done." He says nonchalantly, as if he didn't comprehend that you weren't the type of person who didn't wait the whole weekend to get things done perfectly the first time around.

"The whole weekend? Are you insane? Im not spending the whole weekend working on a pie with you," You say, stomping your foot as you whine.

Billy looked at you, taking in your bratty attitude. He wasn't ashamed to admit, it kind of turned him on a little bit, all though, that also could have just been due to the fantasies he'd been having about how to shut you the fuck up the whole time you'd been working together. God you liked to talk alot.

He just shrugs and you groan.

"I fucking hate you and your stupid procrastinating personality, Hargrove." You grunt out, hands crossed over your chest. He leaned against the counter, red shirt unbuttoned half way, his sleeves rolled up. You weren't one to deny that he was damn good looking, but you still couldn't stand him.

Billy smirks, straightening up. "Likewise, sweetheart." He winks, looking at you as he takes a step closer. He was honestly going to grab his jacket to head out, he figured he'd let you cool off and see you tomorrow. You stepped closer to him, almost as if you were challenging him.

"And just where do you think you're going?" You ask, looking up at him, uncrossing your arms and putting your hands on your hips. "I didn't say we were done yet."

Billy had to admit, the bossy attitude was fucking hot right then, and he was definitely horny after what he'd been thinking about. "Bossy is a hot look on you, sweetheart." He says, stepping just a little bit closer to you. You roll your eyes, not expecting him to grab your chin in his hand, his fingers squeezing your cheek. "That was rather rude, Y/N, don't be a fucking brat."

You couldn't help the immediate turn on, god it had come out of nowhere and you generally wouldnt have let this happen, but fuck you were frustrated enough as it was, you didn't need to be left horny too. "And what are you gonna do about it, hm?" You ask, eyebrow raised at him.

Billy takes that as his invitation and thank fucking god because he wasn't planning on ending the weekend without fucking you at least once, he may have found you annoying as hell but you were definitely the hottest girl in school, and you had never paid him the time of day before now. Without another moments he closed what little bit of space was between the two of you and planted a rough, sloppy kiss on your mouth.

You groan at the sensation, moving your mouth with his almost too eagerly. He takes his hand off of your face, letting it travel down to the top of your blouse with his other one, taking a good grip at the collar and yanking on it. All of the buttons pop off and scatter to the ground, you make a noise of surprise and pull away but he reaches his hand behind you, smacking your ass roughly.

"Shut up." He grunts, letting your hands unbutton his shirt the rest of the way before starting to push you backwards towards the table, undoing his belt the entire way. He could already see how flustered you were and god damn it looked sexy on you.

Your back hits the table, and you shrug your blouse off of your shoulders, your bra straps too, letting it slide down to your torso, leaving you exposed to him.

You hear him suck in a breath his eyes on your chest, you half expect him to start playing with your breasts, it's what most guys you had been with had done, and you made a shocked noise when he used both of his hands to push you to your knees, his cock right in front of you, hard and ready, waiting to use you.

"Suck." He grunts out, taking a fist full of your hair. You do as told, taking him into your mouth eagerly. He throws his head back, a low sigh coming from his parted lips. "Fuck.." You Bob your head, taking him in farther every time, coating him with your saliva. You use your hands, wrapping both around him as you twist and suck, within a few moments he's thrusting his hips gently into your mouth, his hand gripping your hair tightly, fucking your face until you're a drooling, slobbering fucking mess all over him. "Sweetheart, you look so fucking perfect getting your mouth fucked like that, and i could come all the way down your fucking throat but, id rather fuck you first, because where the fuck is the fun if we can't both fuck the hate away?"

He pulls out of your mouth, and you groan. His hand drops your hair and goes to your throat, wrapping around it as he pulls you back to your feet. "On the fucking table," He says, pushing your skirt up your hips and pulling your panties down your legs as you settle onto the table edge, your legs spread nice and wide for him, your arousal shining in the light. "Such a little fucking whore aren't you, who knew that little miss perfect liked to be used like a toy?" He asks, he let his fingers roam up your pussy, hearing your small moan at the contact, fuck it was hotter than he had expected it to be. "Can your pussy take my cock as well as your mouth can? Hm? Can I fuck you good and hard?"

You give a breathless noise, looking up at him, legs already hooked around his fucking waist, eyes trailing down the exposed skin of his muscled torso. He really was as hot as you'd heard. "Fuck me already, Billy." You whine out, not in the mood for games, afraid you'd get caught by your brother or parents, but too turned on to stop him.

You didnt have to wait long, within moments he's pushed himself inside of you, his cock filling every fucking inch of you perfectly, your pussy swallowing him up perfectly. "Fuck.." You heard him groan again, his hips thrusting lightly at first before giving a long, sharp snap of a movement that has you throwing your head back, a string of curses escaping your mouth.

He keeps a steady pace, your table creaking and croaking underneath the weight of the two of you, him leaning over you, planing rough, wet kisses over your mouth to keep from screaming too loudly, he was afraid your neighbors would hear, or your brother if he decided to come home early. You pawed at his skin, your nails digging in and scratching down his chest as he lifted your hips in a way that made you arch back up into him, unable to help your bodies responses to him.

"Fucking hell, sweetheart." He groans out, picking you up completely and moving backwards to the chair behind him. Still bouncing you on his cock as he did. He say, giving your ass a nice two handed squeeze before slapping once, twice, leaving red marks he was sure. "Ride it, baby."

That was how ended up here, riding his cock like it was the last thing you'd ever do. Fuck you hated yourself for it, but god your pussy had never felt better. He leaned his head down, taking one of your tits in his mouth, his tongue rolling around your nipple, sucking on it the supple flesh. He couldn't receiving himself, he had to give it a nice hard bite. he smirked, feeling you shudder against his body, a squeaking noise coming from his mouth as you scratch your nails down his chest again, causing him to moan, slapping your ass roughly once more.

He could tell you were close to coming, he could tell by the look on your face and the way your body was moving against his own. He wasn't too far off either. He reached a hand up to your hair, tangling your hand in the locks as he angled your head against his own, watching your eyes. "Such a good fucking whore riding my cock like a fucking pro," He says, he figured you deserved some praise. "good fucking girl, gonna cum all over it, hm? cum all over my fucking cock like a good little slut..there you go, good girl." He grunts, your hips stuttering and a silent moan escaping your mouth. He wasn't too far behind, and within moments he lifted you off of him, leaning you back just enough that he could come all over your stomach, ruining your skirt as the hot, thick spurts hit it. "Fuck.." He sighs, sitting back in the chair, letting you catch your breath for a moment.

You looked like a goddess to him, you looked perfect with your hair messy, and your face red and flushed, but relaxed and calm looking. You looked at him, unable to stop the giggling that escaped your lips. He looked at you, eyebrow raised.

"I'm sorry." You says, a small smile on your face as you stand up slowly. You figured he wasn't the hanging around type, and you didn't want to keep him from whatever his plans were. "This just totally wasn't how I expected this to go."

Billy chuckles, pulling his jeans up and buckling them. "Glad I could be of service." He says, grabbing his jacket off the table. "I'll be back tomorrow, I'll bring cherries and flour." He says grabbing his keys.

He walks past you, giving you a light pat on your still exposed ass, he caught sight of your brothers car through the living room window as he came to the hallway. "He's home." He calls over his shoulder, sending you running up the stairs with a squeak.

@bloatedandlonly

#stranger things #stranger things smut #stranger things s2 #billy hargove smut #billy hargove x reader #billy hargrove

701 notes · View notes

seeingivy · 7 days

Text

method acting asks!

THIS IS QUITE LITERALLY THE MOST INSANE THING SOMEONE HAS EVER SAID TO ME LITERALLY WTF 😭

first and foremost, totally understandable. this feels evil to admit but I watched the entire first season and four episodes of season two before I stopped. then it was 2020 and instead of studying for my ap exams I decided to watch the entire show (at that time season 4) was coming out and basically fell in love.

IM GLAD THAT IT GOT YOU TO WATCH TO THE END because god really I am never going to forget this though. this is still though quite literally the most insane thing someone has ever said to me and the highest praise bc wdym YOU READ THE ENTIRE FIC NOT HAVING WATCHED THE SHOW AND THEN WENT AND WATCHED THE SHOW AFTER I AM SO NOT NORMAL ABOUT THIS WHAT

I do think a lot about engagements/numbers on tumblr when it comes to my writing and I do think that part of that is natural just because the fact that numbers are there makes it so easy to compare to other people. this is one of the least popular things ive ever written but the interactions and conversations and love I do get from people who have read this makes it so worth it for me that it makes my heart swell. like sincerely, this is the only reason that it has gone on for so long and why I try to make chapters long and put in things that I know people want to see UGH im so not normal about this thank you so much

OH KINGTSON IS SO THEMFLDKMFDKSLJFKLDSAF

this made me giggle. I know the crowds were cheering when the 1. she started confessing 2. they started kissing 3. he started kissing her neck but then I had to gag everyone really quick because first and foremost you guys cannot forget who I am

ANOTHER ONE OF THESE??? WTF IS GOING ON GUYS YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME 😭

wait im so flattered that you thought of me that makes me so so happy I love howl's moving castle so much like I respectfully will never ever be changing my pfp on here because it is perfect

the end is SOOOOO THEM wait wtf this is such a good song. you always give me the best best songs that i've never heard of before AND I love you for it

so random but TW @/hellolitty and I were talking about this earlier but I was making the observation that the people who DO READ method acting seem to get the same ear worms about this story that I do where every song becomes a method acting song. like I have to physcially stop myself from putting five songs in a chapter just because it's overkill and I can't.

^^side note. last chapter currently has six songs in the lineup. that was me trying to cut it down btw.

@tangerine-neonlight DUDE I said this earlier. loml is my favorite song so naturally I have been thinking about it an abnromal amount but y/n would write this about eren after they broke up. and then when they're dating she finds the lyrics and she's like oH MY GOD HELLO??? LOSS OF MY LIFE? and she's so sad that she ever made him feel like that and he's like ok relax we're literally together

CORRECT.

julie and the phantoms you will always be famous. and you are correct.

@elliesbabygirl who had a normal reaction to historia/sofia/ymir (no one raised their hands)

tHANK U SM. I do feel for people who read the entire thing back to back bc the emotional whiplash must be insane.

anyways!

songs in the next chapter are long live by taylor swift, there's a tunnel under ocean blvd by lana del ray, and this love by taylor swift

#asks!#method acting

20 notes · View notes

bunnypansy · 7 months

Text

Twst as K-Pop Groups!

Rated E, for EVERYONE!

A short film exploring a Twisted Wonderland Idol AU!

Featuring: All the dorms + Che'nya and a Neige mention

Beware! This film contains: really bad kpop group names, smoking mention, otherwise I think it's fine

Heartslaybul

Group name: LVBZ (Luver Boyz), I wanted to lean into the heart theme for that classic boygroup feel

Fandom name: Rozes, for obvious reasons

While Riddle is the obvious answer for leader, Trey is the right answer. Responsible older brother Trey is probably deeply underappreciated in the group. I feel like he’s probably been in a group that disbanded early before, (cough, Che’nya, Trey, Riddle group anyone?) and has a bit of a tired vibe. He writes a good handful of the songs since he plays the guitar, but he’s actually not crazy about pop. They definitely share a dorm and Trey made a chore chart for them.

Riddle is definitely taking the position of vocalist and center, he’s probably really strict about his training and exercise, he was a trainee for a loooong time and after his last group he’s kinda nervous. His mom used to be a very popular vocalist, but you’ll never catch him with nepo baby claims because he’s so intense. Besides LVBZ Riddle also does some modeling on the side and will probably end up in a drama of some kind.

Cater is absolutely giving “has so many predebut photos” energy. From vlives, to vlogs, cooking videos, asmr videos, tiktoks, instagram posts, Cater is all over their social media like crazy. He’s got a pretty good public image, always interacting with fans, the only thing is- he's a chronic content farmer, it's like so bad guys. At least his aegyo is actually cute? He’s the face and probably a sub vocalist of some kind, but definitely writes the lot of their songs. Seems like the type who has a very good image but chainsmokes/vapes on the side.

RAPPER DEUCE. Okay normal again. But he totally fits the rapper vibes, I can’t stress how well it fits. Has the most embarrassing predebut photos known to man, lots of him with badly dyed hair and he probably had a bullying scandal really early into his career. Extremely awkward aegyo, fans love him cus he comes off as cute but very genuine, fan favorite.

At this point I’ve put all the basketball boys as dancers but can you blame me? Ace reeks of high energy dancer who kinda sucks ass at singing. He tries really, but just let him be the main dancer and a sub rapper! Ace and Deuce used to go to the same highschool predebut and did not get along. Don't leave this guy alone with fans, not because he's going to do anything criminal- he's just gonna say some dumb shit. Spill a secret, be generally kinda dickish- just. Don't do it, fanservice is not Ace’s strong suit

Their discography is kinda all over the place but I feel like that’s the Heartslaybul vibe? I tried to keep it light and sort of… classic boy group vibes. I'm not really into light concept boy groups so this was difficult for me. (I wrote this before I listened to zb1’s debut. They are zb1)

Debut song: Kitsch by IVE

Other tracks: In Bloom by Zb1; Very Nice by Seventeen; Attention by New Jeans; Sour Grapes by Lesserafim; Blue Flame by Lesserafim; Best Friend Ever by NCT Dream

Solo releases: One and Only by Gowon of Loona (Riddle); Anti-romantic by TXT (Trey)

Savanaclaw

Group name: BxB (Boy X Beast), I swear I wasn’t trying to copy TXT that hard

Fandom name: BOB (Be Our Best), because fans “make them their best”. It’s so bad but this is intentional

Leona is the leader but honestly he doesn’t do much to corral anyone. He’s definitely been in a couple groups that have done very poorly and can’t stop getting compared to his more successful brother- a recently retired soloist. Worse, he gets tons of “he’s a lazy dancer” and “nepo baby” comments from fans. He’s a bit jaded, and for good reason. He’s not much of a dancer, moreso acting as the visual and vocalist in his group and chances are he’s done an acting gig or two. Leona does a lot of low energy vlives, it's like him eating fried chicken in the dark while barely talking on camera. Refuses to do any cutesy fanservice, ask him to look hot? Done and done. Aegyo? Ask Ruggie.

Ruggie is the face of the group, everyone on the planet has seen him busking before and during his trainee period, not to mention he’s funny, fans love him. He’s also carrying the rapper position, and often gets center, but he and Leona are honestly neck and neck in that area. Ruggie's pretty good aegyo but he literally always laughs afterwards. So many memes of the dumb faces he makes while laughing.

Jack iiiis the dancer, so many first years were subjected to dancer and rapper sorry guys. He’s tried to write songs but only a couple have really panned out- the others are encouraging though! Obviously maknae, endless jokes about being GIANT despite being the youngest. Somehow he seems to take this the most serious despite being the newest to this?

Their sound is very classically masculine, as is Savanaclaw’s vibe. If they barked in the song I legally had to add it

Debut song: Clap by Seventeen

Other Tracks: Superbowl by SKZ; Wonderland by ATEEZ; Wolfgang by SKZ (sorry it was too funny not to); (Grrr 총량의 법칙) BEWARE by SKZ; My Pace by SKZ; Boxer by SKZ; Bouncy by ATEEZ

Solo releases: None

Octavinelle

Group name: TYDE (“Take Your Dreams Everywhere”), I went the EXiD route with this one, it was a little too funny not to

Fandom name: Tied, because TYDE is tied to them

Oh my god. Despite being my favorite dorm, Octavinelle gave me a fuckin hell of a time to put together, I just did not have a clear vision for them at all. I’m going with Azul, even though I considered leader Jade for a little bit, simply because I think Azul is the kind of leader who designs a bunch of merch for the fans- a la the VIXX thong. He’s rocking with the visual, center, and vocalist position. He comes off as a very smooth and self assured leader, but let’s be honest he’s the only one in the group who’s having a panic attack before award shows. I think he probably had a really hard time as a trainee and can’t let that go just yet.

Jade doesn’t get any kind of strong spot in the lineup somehow, despite there only being three members, he definitely ends up a bit in the background. But Jade doesn’t mind! He honestly doesn’t care much for the spotlight and is mostly here because Azul and Floyd are. He writes all the songs for their group, no arguments.

So we all know Floyd is the dancer, guy canonically loves dancing, but he’s also going to steal the rapper position. This is because rappers are always the weird ones in the group, and by god is Floyd the weird one. He always gets styled extremely strangely, I mean every time he steps on stage he ends up in a new “worst outfits in kpop” list. Floyd ends up being the face because he’s such a standout, not to mention the fact he keeps… showing up with other groups. Is there a vlive happening? Somehow Floyd interrupts. Another group practicing? Not without Floyd they’re not. He’s even managed to be in the background of several MVs (think OOH-AHH Chan). Floyd seems to just know everyone everywhere.

Holy hell okay their music gave me a hard time too. Octavinelle is so solidified as jazz in my head that trying to think of anything else for them gave me an aneurysm.I struggled so much that yeah I’m breaking and adding one or two japanese songs, sorry guys

Debut Song: Mafia In The Morning by Itzy

Other Tracks: Dice by Nmixx; First by Everglow (tell me Azul wouldn’t tear up those vocals?? Get Floyd on the chorus? Screaming); Play with Fire by Camellia (covered by ツバサ【歌の部屋】 if you need to hear a human sing it); Black Suit by Super Junior

Solo releases: ViViD by Heejin of Loona (Azul); Villain by Stella Jang (Azul)

Scarabia

Group name: Wysper (Honestly not happy with either of the names but I can’t think of anything better)

Fandom name: Wishes

Okay they’re complex because. Uh. Jamil is basically doing everything. He’s the most talented dancer, rapper, vocalist; it’s just that Kalim is the face. Aaaand the center. Despite being a trainee for a way shorter amount of time, despite not being as skilled as Jamil, Kalim took first place in the competitive show they both participated in. Very bitter. Jamil tries to keep it on the down-low but their relationship is definitely suffering from favoritism.

Kalim has probably been a star for a very long time, I’m talking child star levels of fame and already had a fan base by the time he and Jamil debuted. He’s got amazing charisma and stage presence, not to mention Kalim is taking first place as the aegyo king. However, the nepo baby allegations are through the ROOF, seeing as his family straight up owns the company he and Jamil debuted under. That’s not to say he doesn’t try! He works hard, but it’s not going to save him, especially when he’s getting a billion offers from modeling companies and fashion brands, when Jamil isn’t.

I can’t describe what their sound is exactly? I feel like it’s somewhere close to reggaeton with a bit of bollywood/southeast asia

Debut song: You cannot tell me Paint The Town by Loona is not THE Wysper song. It’s literally so perfect I was angry I didn’t think of it earlier. Kalim on the light verses, Jamil on the chorus? Insane.

Other tracks: Icky by Kard; Charmer by SKZ; Cake by Kard; Ring the Alarm by Kard; Tinnitus by TXT; SHOOT! by Itzy; Red Moon by Kard

Solo releases: Singing in the Rain by JinSoul of Loona (Kalim)

Pomefiore

Group name: FoE (Fruit of Evil), I wanted to lean into the lip/biting themes for them and pick something that felt suitably sexy

Fandom name: Bites

Vil has to be the leader obviously, but he’s also the face, visual and vocalist- let’s be real he’s the most favored of the group and everyone knows it. He was definitely an actor before this, he probably ended up in the group because of an elimination show that he won and then got the privilege of picking all his other members. He for sure has some solo releases, brand deals, modeling gigs- Vil is the it boy of their generation, the kind of idol everyone knows. Definitely a massive one-sided rivalry with Neige, because Neige was probably in a NCT Dream type group as a kid, then went solo when he got older and became incredibly successful. Vil is endlessly jealous.

Rook was probably a runner up in the same show as Vil and fully admitted to being a massive fan while on the show. He’s the best dancer in the group, probably the center, and writes the majority of the songs cus I know this weird fucker likes poetry. Rook is guy who’s a fan before he’s an idol, definitely has a room full of merchandise, people have caught him buying albums of his favorite group

Epel is the maknae, obviously, and was probably previously a background dancer. Vil saw him and picked him up by the scruff of his neck. He’s definitely the only real rapper of the group and can dance pretty well, but this is not the kind of group he wanted to be in. Epel was probably hoping for a concept a bit more like BxB but we don’t all get what we wish for

I listened to Nude while making this and it changed my entire vibe for their group. They’re just (g)-idle. If the music makes you wanna worship a woman it belongs to FoE.

Debut song: Love Dive by IVE

Other Tracks: Nude by (g)-idle; Oh my God by (g)-idle; Villain Dies by (g)-idle; Snapping by Chung Ha; Do Not Touch by Misamo of Twice; Cry For Me by Twice

Solo releases: Vengeance by Bibi (Vil)

Ignihyde

What group

It’s just Idia

He’s probably a producer or sumthing let’s be so real guys. Ortho is his sound set up.

I’ll still give examples of what I think his tracks sound like tho. Lots of dubstep and generally electronic sounds cus… come on guys, it’s too perfect.

Tracks: Illusion by Aespa; Miroh by SKZ; Freeze by SKZ; Hold On Tight by Aespa

Diasomnia

Group name: Som.nia (Nia), I wanted to lean into the sleepy/dream feeling

Fandom name: Niacs, insomnia/insomniac you get it okay

“Malleus is leader!” you cry, and you are wrong, because Lilia literally has to be leader. He is the objectively the best (and funniest) option, Malleus does not have the backbone to be leader yet. Lilia has been around the block a billion times; he’s been a vkei idol, he’s been a model, he’s probably been a wrestler let’s be real he’s the Sakura of twst fr. He writes most of the songs for the group, but is definitely trying to get the others to improve their songwriting skills. While Lilia gets a lot of offers, he turns them down. If I’m honest, he’s probably going to quit being an idol after

Malleus is definitely taking the vocalist position, no question. He’s also probably taking the “least popular member of the group” position. Poor guy is seriously awkward on camera and has a chronic case of resting scary face. He takes center pretty frequently, half as an attempt to get him some more recognition- it’s not great cus he’s kinda a stiff dancer. He was fairly popular pre-debut for his extremely strange energy

Call me insane, but dancer Silver! He’s very physically capable, it’s just… you’ll catch him sleeping every time he’s not practicing. Definitely has insane muscle memory, he could do all his choreography with his eyes closed. He’s also an occasional vocalist, he’s got a nice soft voice. Sebek is always getting on him for “being lazy” but Silver usually just tells him to screw off.

Sebek gets rapper because he’s sooooo good at projecting and enunciating aggressively. It’s all the Malleus worship. I think he was a trainee at the same time as Malleus and was utterly obsessed with him, fan favorite for being So Weird All The Time.

I’ll be so real, if the song made me feel gorgeous it went on the list. They kinda reek of 3rd gen Kpop? This is definitely Lilia’s fault. But I’m so here for it the nostalgia go CRAAAZY. Also they are VIXX thanks.

Debut Song: Butterfly by Loona

Other Tracks: Bite Me by Enhyphen; Chained Up by VIXX, Shangri-La by VIXX; Blood, Sweat and Tears by BTS (are you kidding me this addition is so good I’m genuinely LOSING IT); Scentist by VIXX; Fever by Enhyphen; Sugar Rush Ride by Enhyphen; Inception by ATEEZ

Solo releases: Egoist by Olivia Hye of Loona (Silver)

Honorable mentions (these are a bit shorter)

First year gang

Group name: F1rst

Fandom name: Zer0, because they come before first

Jack gets to be leader! He’s responsible, if a bit nervous, takes the vocalist position here.

Epel gets visual in this case, though he still does a fair amount of rap.

Deuce is the best with fans and gets to be center, he’s a pretty good all-rounder here.

Ace is still the best dancer in the group and literally will never stop gloating.

Sebek gets to be the rapper and takes the face position because he’s So Weird All The Time

I think they are literally just Stray Kids tbh, my favoritism is showing but I don’t even care

Debut Song: Break All the Rules by Cravity

Other Tracks: Super board by SKZ; Thunderous by SKZ; S-Class by SKZ; Domino by SKZ; TOPLINE by SKZ; God’s Menu by SKZ

Pop music club

Group name: Jump Up! I wanted to pick something really cheery and high energy

Fandom name: Highs

Kalim is leader here again, he’s just got that energy! He also gets to be the rapper

Cater swipes the vocalist position, finally gets a chance to shine fr

Old man Lilia somehow bags the dancer position and is no question the face

They're peppy, poppy, a classic girl group type noise.

Debut song: Hi High by Loona was truly too perfect

Other tracks: Hula Hoop by Loona; Air Force One by Odd Eye Circle of ARTMS

Floyd + Che’nya + Ruggie

Group name: THEE (can be said like “thee” or “tee-hee”)

Fandom name: Teenies

Ruggie is the leader and lead dancer for this one!

Seeing as Floyd has had dancer ripped from his hands by Ruggie, he’s going to fully take over rap

And Che’nya gets to be vocalist, I like to believe he’s got some pipes on him

Literally just silly vibes

Debut song: Cheese by SKZ

Other Tracks: Taller Than You by Mamamoo; Maniac by SKZ; Circus by SKZ; Don’t Tease Me by Speed

Lilia + Malleus + Vil + Rook

Group name: Nu Moon

Fandom name: Starlights, yeah I stole it from VIXX, sue me

Malleus, king of goth, gets to lead this group- it’s a very good starter group to lead, considering he’s got a lot of experienced members

Lilia is quite obviously producing every single song for this group, that’s mostly what he’s here to do, so he also takes up the mantle of dancer

Vil is once again the visual and the face, but he’s giving up the vocalist position

Shock of shocks, Rook gets to be the vocalist here! Because he doesn’t get to shine much in FoE

They are literally dreamcatcher.

Debut song: BEcause by Dreamcatcher

Other tracks: Piri by Dreamcatcher; Odd Eye by Dreamcatcher; Boca by Dreamcatcher; Scream by Dreamcatcher

That's the end of today's showing, as always, thank you for coming.

Did anyone ask for this? uhhhh no. But it made me very happy so whatever. Legitimately Octavinelle gave me so much trouble I changed their tracklist like four times. I was tempted to make Diasomnia Dreamcatcher as well, but I didn't want to erase Silver's lo-fi soft boy vibes.

53 notes · View notes

bellafragolina · 1 year

Note

I just found your blog and Ive been binge reading the whole thing this entire weekend. I love how you write Ingo and Emmet! and if I may humbly request a drabble about Warden Ingo x a motherly reader who fell through the Rift into Hisui. She dotes on all the village kids, always worrying over Lain and Rei, and is always cooing and fussing over her pokemon.

And the moment she’s introduced to Warden Ingo she just-immediately starts fussing over him. Poor man doesn’t even get out a hello before she’s asking if he is alright, what happened to his coat, when was the last time he slept, etc etc. From then on she’s always making a point to check in on him to make sure his taking care of himself and offers to mend his coat if his alright with her trying to fix it. Just smothers him in affection.

thanks for reading this and hope you have a good day!- Sweetea Anon

Aww! Motherly characters are the best! Very very good!! And thank you!! I’m glad you’re enjoying what I got so far

🍓🍓🍓

Hisui is a dangerous world, and you’ll be damned if the Galaxy Team sends out children with no support. Hell, you’ll be damned if the clans make children wardens without any time to be simply children. You put your mom jeans on (or perhaps just mom pants as denim has yet to be invented) and storm after the kids, Kamado be damned

All the kiddos love you. Akari and Rei lean heavily on you when things grow to be too much. It’s a lot of pressure to withstand, so you always offer them a place to rest their heads and cry their tears without judgement. You feed them too, bandage their wounds, kissing them so they heal faster. Neither really believe the superstition, but their injuries always seem to ache more without your kisses.

Sabi and Lian similarly rely on you. Your visits to their stations are always met with cheers. As much as Lian tries to act grown up, he’s still a young boy, and he often joins Sabi in barreling your over with hugs. The two love you, love that you listen to their rambles and indulge their wants to play. You wrestle them and play pretend so well, always kissing their heads and saying how proud you are of them. It means more to them than you realize

Ingo sees this, before you properly meet. He lingers on the outskirts of your interactions with the children, warmed by how attached to you and your care they seem. When you’re finally introduced by Rei and Akari, Ingo tips his hat to you. You respond by immediately fluttering over and fussing over the bags that hang below his eyes. Ingo flusters from the care, and the kids only laugh as you guide him to your abode for a warm meal and a good night’s sleep

From there, your relation blossoms. You make it your mission to take care of him, and though Ingo worries about you traveling all the way to the Highlands for him, he has to admit he melts at your softest touch. He’s been very alone at his station, so you coming in with your warmth and gentleness, it soothes the ache that seems to never leave Ingo’s heart. He’s quick to grow attached to you, your cooking especially, since his own skills are a little lacking in that area. In return, he finds you rare materials you need, bringing them to you with doed eyes

Every time you visit, before you leave, Ingo takes your hand in his weathered palms, and presses a firm kiss to the valley of your knuckles. His lips are chapped but warm as well, and never fail to make you shudder as they brush the sensitive skin. It makes you ache, a want to kiss him back buried deep within your heart. When the need grows to be too much, you dive foreword, sealing your lips together as he rises from your hand

Ingo jolts, but eagerly leans into you. Finally, he thinks to himself. Now his daydreams of having a family with you don’t feel so shameful

🍓🍓🍓

Ingo is definitely the guy that daydreams about having kids with his crush. Wants to be a dad so bad

~Renee

#warden ingo x reader #ingo x reader #pokemon imagines #pokemon x reader #submas x reader

297 notes · View notes

normiematsu · 6 months

Text

SO CUTES.... MY THOUGHTS........

ive said before theyre like rivals 2 lovers in a way because before they get to know each other all of their interactions involve bumping into each other trying to get the same last piece of anime merch somewhere. eventually yuu is curious about choro bc isnt it kind of sus that hes always popping up wherever she does...! but he doesnt seem like a bad guy so she takes a chance and asks him to hang out. really this is rivals to friends to lovers....

they get along surprisingly well!! so one thing leads to another and they end up spending a looooot of time together, the whole time insisting they're totally just friends (osomatsu is especially insufferable about teasing them it makes him sick to see them all over each other but neither wants to make the first move)

after theyve hung out for a while and gotten closer maybe theres a period where shes super busy with work and cant hang out at ALL... just going in to the manga cafe and going home after cos theyre short staffed, dealing w customers all day and cleaning up after them... its making her insane doing clopening shifts over and over. her mind keeps wandering thinking stuff like "wow i am about to EXPLODE i wish i was hanging out at chibitas or at the arcade with c... c... ch...."

she hits a hard stop then and there. once that thought starts trying to finish itself she already knows shes cooked. the realization that shed rather be spending all her free time with choro is a lil terrifying to her bc she hadnt even realized she liked him that much...! this is so world shattering she would look stupid as hell behind the counter head in her hands with new customers walking in asking if shes ok LOL. she thinks for hours about this afterwards and cant sleep once she gets home.

the next day and from then out until she accidentally drunkenly confesses to him she tries so so so hard to keep up appearances but even choro can catch on to something being... off... about the way shes acting. he doesnt wanna get his hopes up bc hed honestly just be happy as her friend. but the way she steals glances at him when she thinks hes not looking..... the way she scoots the closest to him when everyone is eating at chibitas.... the way she puts up with his antics but never really truly looks down on him for being an otaku neet.... he cant help but hope she likes him back

BONUS: choro is the only one who knows Where she works and what exactly it entails (she tells everyone else she just works at a regular bookstore not a manga cafe, she doesnt want most ppl knowing shes an otaku) so it would be very cute and thoughtful if he showed up to her next shift to cheer her up. he goes up to the counter and coughs nervously to get yuu's attention. she looks up to see this guy she KNOWS is unemployed asking nervously to rent a half hour booth for what's probably his last 350 yen. he slides her favorite candy across the counter with his change. they are both exploding inside

#NO REFORMATTING NO BETA WE DIE LIKE MEN. hope this isnt hard to read its stream of consciousness yuucho...#yuucho #yuulore

17 notes · View notes

bulbabutt · 1 year

Note

I'll be honest the worst part of the love triangle in 12 to me (or at least the worst part of the fan reaction to the love triangle in 12) is the people who act like it's somehow Rob Paulsen and/or Mae Whitman and/or Josh Peck's fault that it's like that. I mean, putting aside the fact that blaming the VAs instead of the writers is not cool (and also the fact that Paulsen and Whitman are ridonkers talented as VAs-Paulsen has too many to name and Whitman just needs the two-hit combo of Katara into Amity Blight, Peck I have less to say as because I only really know him from Drake and Josh and 12 itself but he seems alright), they're not the only parts of their characters! Donnie and Casey get plenty of stuff to do outside of that, and while April definitely gets the short end of the stick there I can at least think of a few solid bits here and there. 12 has problems but it's really annoying when Rise ultrafans act like 12 is some blight on the franchise (we have Next Mutation for that thanks). (AND I LIKE RISE I STRESS)

ok first of all people do WHAT lmao thats actually insane, it doesnt even matter if the actors are talented or not, its very bad behaviour to be blaming actors for anything lmao

lemme also say its not even always the writers faults either, cuz something about 12s writing issues i didnt give credit to was nickelodeon or playmates for how they clearly are behind the scenes saying "do this, do that". cuz all tmnt shows are shows made to sell toys and a lot of the time things that happen is also cuz some studio exec is coming in being like "hey! we need more _ cuz kids like _!"

but like if i can be absolutely honest when i say this and this is not even directed at you so like no offence to you or anyone who's got something to say about 12 or rise or whatever this is just like reminding me of the weird inter-iteration behaviour ive seen recently (like i browse tmnt crossover stuff cuz... obvs i wanna see crossover stuff, but lately i keep seeing nastiness)

but i have seen 12 ultra fans, i have seen rise ultra fans, i have recently seen just how weird and over the top toxic certain people who prefer either can be when discussing their non-favorite show and i just. can i just say. all of you guys. just... just stop interacting w the other people's media? if you dont like a rise fic, dont read it, if you dont like a 12 fic dont read it. if you dont like the characterization? the story? you think somethings ooc? like. its okay. its not for you, just let it be. people arent bad for writing it that way, its theirs. make your own art, interact w peoples art you do like!

idk maybe im just too old for this but ive seen people on either side of that whole...............situation. put their entire faces into videos like ripping the shit out of people and naming and linking the art theyre talking about and it seems really mean.

anyway all this to say please dont talk to me about whatever drama has happened between iterations (its always those two) like... the issue is very much just gonna be a generational divide. thats all it is. 12 came out a time when the jokes were a bit meaner, and rise came out in a post steven universe era. both of these shows are good they both are just different genres. people from either side of it have different tastes because of the specific thing they like in tmnt. if rise fans think the 12 turtles come off toxic and you dont thats their business, dont interact w them. if 12 fans dont like how different rise is leave them to it.

specifically please leave me out of it, and just dont be mean to each other. putting someone on blast for their art or their perspective just makes you look like the asshole.

also i unironically enjoyed the next mutation im sorry, im cringe but you can take bonesteel and hot vampire lady and mikeys pirate radio and BEST SPLINTER show from my cold dead hands AHJKSDH

#sorry just throwing word soup out there again #this is probably a bad idea im just very tired #and its SOOOO fucking even #its so even on both sides its insane #just pleeeeeeeeease leave people alone #thoughts

28 notes · View notes

slightlyunconventional · 1 year

Text

as a follow-up to my post where i mentioned a modern au/established relationship k/anej setting, i thought i'd make a list of snzcanons based around that 🤭 mostly k/az centric probably but we'll see if i get any i/nej ideas while im making this

ok here we. go

- caretaking between them when they live together is very different from the days in the slat; it's much more open and comfortable, and there's a level of vulnerability that both of them (mainly kaz, though) are able to show because they know there's much more safety and trust there than ever before

- continuing the kaz hayfever agenda purely to exploit it because inej loves to have plants all over their house and fill their garden with flowers. he's usually fine cause antihistamines exist but on the off chance that he forgets to take them, or they've run out cause he's so stupidly sensitive, then basically all hell breaks loose and he is totally unable to catch a break from sneezing his HEAD OFF. obviously from the outside this seems kinda dense of him because why doesn't he just,,, get rid of all the flowers?? but he doesn't want to because he knows how much inej loves them and loves gardening. plus he's fine once he takes his meds so realistically what's the problem

- look i know i keep giving kaz every allergy ever but just hear me out okay. if you hate me for it you can pretend each allergy he has is a separate universe. anyway what if the dreadful combination of dust allergy and detergent/air freshener/surface cleaner/etc allergy (select as applicable). just LISTEN RIGHT. he's sneezy because of the dust, so he and inej decide to CLEAN. but then he's SNEEZY AGAIN because of the cleaning supplies. boom who's a genius? me. (or an idiot. i haven't decided yet)

- maybe as a follow on for The One Above, i thought maybe kaz is only all sneezy and itchy during the cleaning process so once they're done and the scent of it all is out of the air then he's fine. that seems reasonable right

(also yeah ive decided that all these allergy headcanons are probably too much for just one person to deal with. so take them as individual things rather than A Collective. (unless you too hate it when a man isn't sneezing 24/7 in which case yeah let's bombard the poor guy with every allergy known to man ill pick you up at seven.))

- when kaz gets sick he still instinctively tries to shut himself away out of fear of getting inej sick too, and also cause he doesn't want her to "waste her time" taking care of him when he's "absolutely fine" and there's "nothing to worry about it's just cold in here". however every single time he's got a cold inej somehow manages to convince him to let her care for him.

- cats! kaz and inej are definitely both cat people and they definitely both wanted a cat immediately after deciding to live together. i like to think that kaz doesn't know he's allergic to cats (since he never really interacts with any kind of animal during his time with the dregs yk ??) so when they go to actually get a cat he discovers this about himself when he becomes an itchy sneezy allergic MESS. but he still insists that inej gets the cat because again antihistamines exist and he has a massive soft spot for cats so as if he's gonna say no. (thinking that they definitely get a fluffy black cat, maybe a younger one that's SMALL AND SO CUTE (i also have a massive soft spot for cats!! could you tell))

- more on the dust allergy a bit: inej and kaz go on little dates all the time and one time they pay a visit to an old library that inej has been interested in for a while, but obviously seeing as the library is so old, all the books are so so dusty and literally every single one that kaz picks up to flick through makes him sneeze like nobody's business. he'd probably be halfway through trying to quiet an itchy fit in the collar of his coat and inej would just take the book out of his hands and guide him by his shoulders away from the cloud of dust that he wafted into the air. cute

- even more on that kind of a sidenote he'd definitely not have the common sense to move from an allergen while he's in a fit, like he just gets too caught up sneezing to even think about maybe Stepping Away cause he just wants to get it out of his system and for whatever reason distancing himself from the thing IN his system doesn't actually cross his mind until inej just sort of guides him away

- inej's care is always very doting, gentle, and loving. she'll always ask before touching him, for example to feel his forehead and check for fever. often if kaz is especially tired (which happens often when he's sick, bless him) she'll offer to hold a bunch of tissues gently to his face as he sneezes or blows his nose into them. aw also definitely a reassuring hand on his back when he's wracked with fits of coughing during particularly bad colds

- she blesses every single sneeze. i KNOW she does. since kaz usually sneezes in doubles (ARGRGRHHHHH (sorry about that went fucking FERAL for a second)) he'll always get a cute little "bless you, bless you!" from her. she is so. i love you inej

- however if he ends up having fits that's a lot of sneezes to bless all of them so she usually settles for a "bless you!" at the end

- also i feel like she might do that thing where the way she says bless you mimics the sound/pitch of the sneeze do you get me. like for example "heHh'ehHSHHhiew!" from kaz gets a "ble-heh-shiew!" from inej. Do you understand the vision i hope i don't sound stupid. anyway kaz hates when she does this (but not like hate in a mean way he's just embarrassed like pls. i have a reputation)

- Omg and inej definitely loves to tease him and say how adorable his nose is especially when it's all red and he's just STOP PLEASE MY DIGNITY

- sorry im losing the plot

- inej tries not to gift him bouquets because 1. he's allergic and 2. there's probably already enough plants in the house. however. kaz buys HER bouquets because he's a gentleman duh. but obviously the whole time he's walking/driving/i don't know what bloody transport they have he's gonna be such an itchy sneezy mess and by the time he actually gives the flowers to inej his eyes and nose are practically streaming and it's all he can do to fight off sneezing again as inej kisses him on the cheek with a giggle to say thank you

- also i love the age old scenario of sneezing while shopping for scented candles!! inej getting excited about all the pretty floral and seasonal scents while kaz is just behind her sniffling so much and his eyes are watering and he is just praying he doesn't end up sneezing a load cause he doesn't want inej to be sad. when he DOES start sneezing though - starting with near silent stifles of course (but inej notices of Course) - he'll tell inej over and over that he'll be fine if there's just one in the house and he's only sneezing now because there's so many on the shelves in front of him

- a lot of this post is just different iterations of "kaz is very allergic but he wants inej to be happy so he keeps being very allergic"

- inej also buys & makes tea for kaz instead of coffee when he's sick. she also sometimes makes some suli tea recipes that she remembers from her childhood for him cause she is the best

- while a lot of her caretaking is tender and loving and doting inej also knows that kaz likes to have his space, so sometimes she shows her care in the form of a mug of steaming tea, two aspirin, and a sticky note saying "feel better soon" waiting for him at his desk

- kaz also hates getting sick in general just the feel of it is gross to him. it's partly because he doesn't feel in control of himself as much and partly because it just feels so sticky and heavy and generally unpleasant. on the bright side inej thinks his stuffy voice is so cute

- ill list off a few brief ideas for other dates they'd go on and kaz would find himself more than a little sneezy: picnic date!! or just a walk/hike in spring when his hayfever is thriving, a cafe date when he's got a cold! so cute, obviously dusty library date like i said before and probably a lot more but i ran out of ideas

- right i know this is definitely a lot of sneezing for one single person to be doing in their life so honestly take all of these headcanons as separate entities because i do not believe it is RIGHT or FAIR to subject someone to as many allergies as i already have and will continue to do. anyway photic kaz. for some reason i like to think that he always without fail sneezes three times when it's suddenly bright (like when he steps outside from a dimmer room or if something shines in his face) and always without fail also will gear up for a fourth sneeze that never comes. three sneezes, then a gasp, then a sigh. Omg

- his photic sneezes are also softer than usual too idk thought id just add that

- right this is the last allergy ill talk about for him REMEMBER HE DOESNT HAVE ALL THESE ALLERGIES AT THE SAME TIME CAUSE THAT'S MEAN OF ME. (unless you want him to 🤭) but perfume allergies are SO. HOT. he loves the smell of inej's perfume, it's sweet and floral and so distinctly *her* but each time she spritzes it on herself he's sneezing. usually not too much though, upwards of like, five, and then he's okay

- inej also massively chastises kaz for stifling. literally every time he does it it's basically a lecture of why stifling is bad and why it's fine just let it out its only me and kaz is like. ok sorry

- thinking about INEJ. i think that her sneezes are quiet just cause she's sort of taught herself to be stealthy and silent and that's rubbed off on her sneezes. they're cute

- also she sneezes into cupped hands!! idk i just think that's so cute for her AH

- usually only sneezes once at a time (she's not nearly as sensitive to stuff as kaz is) however i do like to think that kaz had a cologne at one point that he used to wear primarily cause he didn't have another one and couldn't be bothered to Get another one and it made her sneeze a lot!! and for a while she had no idea what it was because she just seemed to be sneezing nonstop whenever she was close to him. it wasn't until they were getting ready together one morning that she realised it was his cologne making her sneeze - when he sprayed it as she was stood near him and she just!! did not stop!! kaz probably felt so bad he definitely immediately showered and threw the cologne away and kept apologizing to her even though she repeatedly told him it was fine and how was he supposed to know

- kaz isn't quite as teasy as inej is so he'll only bless her sneezes once (loser) and he doesn't like to make an ordeal out of it so he'll just mirror her sneeze's quietness with a soft mumbled "bless," and possibly a hand squeeze if they're holding hands. JUST thought that maybe if she sneezes a little louder or harsher than normal he'll extend to a "bless you," (you know what i mean right with the emphasis on the you part you get it right)

okay this is all i have for now. i will add more/reblog with more if i think of anything but THANKS FOR READING YAY and thanks for making it the way to the end of the incoherent drivel that i call headcanons i hope you didn't lose too many braincells

#WOOOO k strikes again #this is very heavily k/az centric btw but theres a decent few i/nej thoughts at the end cause shes so cutie and i love her #Sorry if this is very un-canon i might be blorboifying k/az too much but like it makes me happy so #anyway enjoy yay thanks LOVE U ALL #snz #snzblr #snz kink #k talks snz #snz blog #snzario #snzcanons #s/hadow and b/one

16 notes · View notes