#ive been crying over her for twenty minutes and im not going to stop any time soon

[microwaveango]

i am so. aya koda. she's so little. she's a little kid and she was saving the world all by her fucking self and im so proud of her and my heart breaks for her too because she's so little. and she tried so hard. and she was so ready to sacrifice herself to save the world but she's a kid and im so. she did so good and she did it all by her self and

#yes after watching that it wasn't in as much danger as previously thought #fukuchi's plans etc etc etc #but for a moment it the world was in the hands of a ten year old girl and she did it #and id die for her #she did so good #bsd s5 spoilers #bsd s5 finale #bsd spoilers #ive been crying over her for twenty minutes and im not going to stop any time soon #aya bsd #aya koda bsd

[wienerbarnes]

Italian Heart

Pairing: Bucky x Italian!MobBoss!Reader

Word Count: 4,867

Warnings: canon level violence, possible inaccurate italian slang lol

A/N: ive been watching a lot of the sopranos lately and i feel like ive never seen a bucky x mob boss reader au (ive only rlly seen em where buckys the mob boss. if there are ones where reader is the mob boss PLS SEND EM TO ME I BEG) a lot of the slang and mob stuff here is from sopranos bc... im not in the fucking mafia so forgive me anyway enjoy :)<3

MAIN MASTERLIST

Bucky’s never seen a woman quite like yourself.

Dressed in expensive satin and jewelry that hangs between your breasts, an angry look on your face at the fact you’re sitting before him and Sam in an interrogation room in the tower. Freshly done nails, clean and crisp lipstick, spicy perfume, and an expression of annoyance.

As put together as you look, you don’t look like someone to be fucked with. Which, he supposes is good for a mobster; the Boss of Newark.

Looking at you, though, he’d never thought you to be such a figure of intimidation. While the mafia is still alive, despite how the media tries to deny this, he always pictured an old Italian man that chain smokes cigars. He doesn’t think he’s too far off, to his credit; he can smell the remnants of smoke on you.

“Mind if we make this fast? My cousin’s comin’ for dinner and I was gonna make ziti.” You huff, crossing your legs under the table.

“Sounds delicious. Sorry for dragging you all the way out here.” Sam says, a calm look on his face even though he’s well aware of what you’re capable of.

When hunting down the last traces of the super soldier serum, he never thought Nick Fury himself would suggest getting in touch with you. He didn’t think it was worth the time to question how the two of you knew each other.

Theft. Drugs. Murder. Bribery. The list goes on, and there’s not a single thing that ties you to any of it.

A shrug of your shoulders, “So, what exactly is this about?” You ask.

“What is it that you do for a living?” Sam asks.

“I work in waste management.” You respond, a rehearsed answer.

Not exactly a lie, the environmental facility you manage is one of hundreds of covers used by your crew for your crimes. Environmental facilities, deli shops, strip clubs, auto shops. There isn’t a business in Jersey you aren’t tied to.

“Waste management? Like, garbage disposal?” Bucky asks, knowing exactly what it is you do for work.

You smirk, “Yeah, we dispose of garbage sometimes. What’s that got to do with me being here?”

“It’s to my understanding that you’re in the business of… buying and selling things. You and… the people you hang around got a real knack for it.” Sam tells you.

Bucky holds back a roll of his eyes. More like stealing and selling. Expensive Italian suits, antique watches, cars, electronics, illegal cigars. Who knows what else.

“I don’t know where you heard that… but I’m a popular gal, maybe I know a guy who might know a guy. What are you lookin’ for?” You ask.

You know this game, after being in the mob for so long. After being a part of your own crew for years, your patience and hard work paid off, working your way up to a captain and finally a boss. It didn’t take you long to learn in this business that government officials are jokes. Always wanting to bust my balls and then come crying to my corner for help, it’s a bunch of ugatz.

“Serums.” Bucky finally speaks.

A laugh escapes you, “What, like vitamin C?” You teasingly smirk at him.

His chair makes a loud sound in the small room as he pushes it back harshly and stands, resting his hands on the table in between the two of you. You don’t flinch.

“Enough with the bullshit. Super serums. To create super soldiers. We need to get them before they end up in the wrong hands and make a big ass mess.” He snaps at you, but you don’t seem phased in the slightest. In fact, you seem rather amused.

“You must have a lot of agita with all that anger, Sergeant Barnes.”

He doesn’t hold back this time and rolls his eyes before you speak up again, “Your first name is James, isn’t it? Ain’t that Italian?”

“No, it’s English. Or Scottish. Or Jewish - I don’t know, who cares? Are you gonna help us or not?” Bucky takes his seat again, crossing his thick arms over his broad chest.

“What’s in it for me?” You ask, leaning back in your chair.

“Not being arrested for all the shit we know you’re caught up in.” Sam offers.

You roll your own eyes this time, “I’ll take my chances. Thanks for wasting my time, boys, don’t let it happen again.” You stand, prepared to make your way back to the train station to go back to Jersey.

“Wait,” Sam stops you, “What is it that you want?”

You smile innocently and take your seat again, taking a minute to think before answering, “My little sister’s a big fan of yours. I’m sure she and all her friends would think it’s cool if you showed up to her prom as her date.” You wink at Sam.

Silence fills the room as the men think about your request.

“You’re gonna do it, right?” Bucky looks over at him and sees Sam rubbing the crease in between his eyes. He was expecting you to ask for immunity, protection, money, guns. But after hearing your request, he supposes you have enough of all that stuff anyway.

“Man -” Sam begins to refuse.

“Sam, it’s a fucking school dance in exchange for some of the most powerful and sought after serums on the planet - go to the fucking prom.” He tells him, eyebrows scrunching in confusion as to how he would hesitate on something so simple.

“She’s eighteen, so you won’t have any problems with the media or none of that.” You add, the information not really making Sam feel any better.

“Alright, alright, fine. I’ll go to the dance with your sister if you help us get these serums.”

You smile, happy to have done business with the two men, “What information do ya got for me?”

…

Bucky and Sam wait outside a back room in the facility you own. They passed the garbage trucks parked neatly outside, but could hear your screaming and the smell of Cuban cigars as soon as they entered the building.

She’s with a customer, they were told, by someone in your crew, them meeting Bucky’s expectations for mobsters more than you did. None of them ask any questions, but Bucky and Sam aren’t stupid, they’re sure your crew is aware of what’s going on and know the exact reason they’re there.

“You’re a fuckin’ asshole, you know that? The Bible says, Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit -”

“You listen to me, you take your Bible and your quotations book and shove it up your fat fucking ass! Now get the fuck out of my face!”

Bucky can’t help but scoff listening to you scream at whoever’s inside. Sam elbows him, silently telling him that now isn’t the time to find your work funny, especially not in front of the rest of your crew.

Bucky knows he’s old-fashioned, and while things that were taboo such as body modifications or certain fashion styles don’t phase him anymore, he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to hearing a woman talk like that. He doesn’t think he’s ever even heard anybody talk like you do.

Suddenly a man bursts out of the room, huffing and puffing, and you walk slowly behind him, as if to make sure he makes it outside okay.

“Grab his plate for me, will you?” You say not to anyone in particular, voice smooth and calm as if you hadn’t been yelling and threatening that man’s life for the past twenty minutes.

One of the men from your crew follows outside, seemingly to collect the license plate of the man who just left.

“Nothing’s gonna happen to that guy, right?” Sam asks as he and Bucky enter the room, taking a seat in front of the desk you have in there. He knows there’s no point in asking, that you’ll do whatever you want regardless because it’s obvious you’re passionate about receiving respect, but it was worth a shot.

“Is that what you came all the way to Jersey to ask me? Christ, I’m fuckin’ starving, you boys want anything to eat?” You ask, accent heavy as you reach into the side drawer of your desk and pull out what seems to be some kind of meat wrapped in paper.

“Gabagool?” You offer to them, picking out a slice for yourself and placing it in your mouth.

“Gesundheit.” Sam responds.

“It’s pork, you asshole.”

Bucky silently reaches over and picks off a slice of the cured cold cut, putting the meat in his mouth and savoring the flavor. While he can’t stand the way you make a living or the sailor’s mouth you have, he loves Italian food, and actually chose a neighborhood in New York that has plenty of traditional cold cut markets and restaurants to live in in order to fulfill his cravings.

“There’s a big party staged downtown this weekend, we think that’s when the drop is going to happen.” Sam tells you, bringing the focus to their reason for coming here in the first place.

“I’ll send one of my boys.” You reply in between your chews.

“That wasn’t the deal. The deal was you get the serums.” Bucky speaks up.

“Buck, you know how many people want her dead?” Sam tries to reason.

“What the fuck do I have a crew for then? - No, if pretty boy wants me to do it myself, then I will. The same people that want my head are the same fucks who are terrified to be within twenty feet of me in fear they’ll make eye contact. I’m not scared of nothin’.” You say, narrowing your eyes at Bucky.

“What did you guys come here to talk about?” You ask.

Sam looks confused at your expression, “...To go over the plan? Hash out details? So you know how everything’s gonna go?”

“I’ll be fine; I’ve seen The Godfather once or twice,” You tell him, wrapping up the cappo, after Bucky picks off one last slice, and replacing it in the drawer, “Don’t worry Captain, this ain’t my first rodeo. I’ll get the serums for you.” You open a different drawer and pull out a cigar and a lighter.

Bucky watches as you place the large cigar in between your red-painted lips, bringing the flame of your lighter to the end and hollowing your cheeks until smoke exits from the corner of your mouth. Bucky feels blood travel south as his eyes glaze over your hand grab the cigar out of your mouth and blow out a long string of smoke.

“I guess we’ll be in touch then,” Sam stands and Bucky follows after.

“My sister’s wearing blue, so find yourself a nice tie.” You call out, lifting your feet up to cross them on the desk, dress rising and showing your legs.

Bucky blushes, and then laughs as he exits when he hears you, in a deep and more exaggerated accent than your own, “Just when I thought I was out… they pull me back in!”

…

The morning of the party, Sam and Bucky pick you up from your house, planning to take you into New York to discuss final details before tonight.

You get in the passenger seat, Sam offering it to you and climbing in the backseat. As Bucky begins to drive off, your phone rings.

“I told you to leave that.” Bucky says, telling you explicitly to leave electronics here to prevent anyone finding out where you are, and also to avoid any distractions.

“Wanted to see what you’d about it, Sarge,” You wink at him, pulling out a flip phone and answering the call.

“Yeah… Uh huh… He what? Are you fucking kidding me?... Alright… Tell him not to move a fucking muscle.” You hang up, slamming the phone closed.

“Stop at the facility for a sec, I gotta take care of something.” Bucky sighs and turns away from the route to head to your facility.

“Bucky’s going to be going with you tonight, by the way, he’ll be in disguise. Just in case anything goes wrong.” Sam tells you, not really caring anymore about having to make a stop for you to take care of whatever business you need to take care of.

Your only response is a hum as Bucky can feel the anger radiating off your now tense body.

You slam the car door shut as Bucky parks behind a garbage truck outside, not even waiting for him to fully put the car in park before you exit.

Him and Sam follow quickly behind you to see what’s going on. You enter through a side door that leads to a large room, a garage for the trucks, Bucky assumes.

There’s a large truck inside, and racks of suits wrapped in plastic scattered around. A younger man stands near the truck as your crew peruses around the racks, he couldn’t be older than twenty-five years old. Your heels click on the ground as you approach, slowing down as you glance between the suits and the young man. Bucky and Sam hang around a few feet behind your trail.

You stop, fuming, staring at the man before you speak, “You wanna tell me what the fuck happened?”

“I -” He begins, but you cut him off, raising an open hand at him.

“Actually, I don’t even want to hear your fucking voice right now. Because if what I heard you did is true; if what you did to Vinny’s guy is true, you’re gonna be a fuck load of trouble.”

“Can I -”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“But -”

“I said shut the fuck up, Christopher! What part of that don’t you understand?” You yell, and even Bucky feels intimidated.

You turn to your crew, “What the fuck happened.” You demand, more than ask.

“Kid says he tried to take the truck, Vinny’s guy had a gun that fell outta the seat, went off, shot him.” One of the men summarizes, not looking up from the rack of suits.

You raise a manicured hand to pinch between your eyes, “You keep me skinny, Christopher, with all the fucking stress you cause me.”

“Would you let me explain?” He tries.

“If you don’t do as I told you and shut your fucking mouth, you’re gonna be buried with two assholes,” You threaten before continuing.

“They were fuckin’ suits! All you had to do was take the truck! How did you fuck that up -” You stop yourself and sigh, attempting to calm yourself down.

“Here’s what’s gonna happen. You’re gonna take all this shit, you’re gonna take it back to Vinny, and you’re gonna tell him what happened yourself.” You finish.

“Marone!” He exclaims, rubbing his face with his hands.

“Enough with the theatrics! You’re lucky I don’t put a bullet in your ass! Now, I don’t see you grabbing that rack and that rack and that rack and putting it back in the truck!” You wave your arms around the room.

The kid sighs and begins grabbing the racks one by one and rolling them back in the truck.

“Would it be such a shame if they all went back?” An older man from your crew asks, already wearing one of the expensive suits. You scoff and laugh.

“Bucky, pick yourself somethin’ nice for tonight,'' You turn to face him, and he jumps at the sound of your now calmer voice being directed at him, as opposed to the harsh one used on Christopher, “On me.” You wink.

...

Sam and Bucky sit on the bed and watch as you get ready. A small apartment near the party that’s already been swept for bugs. A favor, you called it, from someone you know.

They don’t question it.

“You and Bucky will go in together and I’ll be waiting at a secondary location watching and listening to everything.”

Bucky can’t tear his eyes away from your dress. A mermaid dress, he thinks it is, black and tight and hugging you in all the right places, curving around your ass and sleeveless at the top, allowing you to show off a nice necklace and your cleavage. It’s an understatement to say that he’ll enjoy accompanying you tonight, even if it’s in a costume.

His mother probably would’ve loved it if he would’ve gotten with someone like you. Someone who loves their family, a spitfire that wouldn’t take any of his shit, and whose god damn gorgeous. She might’ve had to wash your mouth out with soap, though.

“So, why is Bucky goin’ again?”

“Safety.” Bucky answers.

“Is he going for my safety or am I going for his?” You tease, finishing the last few curls of your hair, smoke coming from the iron after each time you pull your hair away from it.

“Once you find our guy, get talking with him and see if you can get him to make you an offer,” He begins.

“One I can’t refuse?”

“Then, you’ll try and get him alone, see if he’ll show you the serums, and once you do, we’ll be taking care of the rest.” Sam finishes explaining.

Bucky plucks a box from his pocket and opens it to reveal a pair of diamond earrings. One, a camera, and the other, a microphone. You’re also given a comm to hide in your ear so both him and Sam can hear everything and you can hear them.

“Easy - peasy.” You respond.

The ballroom is lively, loud music and people everywhere, and Bucky attunes all the action overwhelming him to a sweat and not that fact that you’re pressed up against him, his arm wrapped around your waist.

About a hundred different people come up to greet you, asking about your family, offering you drinks and food. Bucky can see right through all of them though; they’re all putting on the act out of fear. Everyone’s attention is on you, and Bucky’s sure if he wasn’t in disguise right now, no one would even notice.

You bring him to the middle of the crowd and he can’t be surprised when you start to dance with him, pulling at his arms to get him to loosen up. He complies, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close as the two of you move together.

“I’ll let you know when I spot him.” He tells you, voice causing goosebumps to rise on your neck; goosebumps that he notices but doesn’t point out.

It only takes a song or two before he spots who he’s looking for and sends you over, making sure your com is on, and choosing to stick by the bar, giving him a good view of you and allowing himself a break of having your body pressed against his.

He’s impressed listening to you talk to this guy, voice smooth and sultry, yet still commanding.

He knows there was a lot of talk when you took position as boss; not a lot of people in the mob took you seriously and didn’t think you or a woman in general would be good in that kind of position in power. So, you use that to your advantage to get shit done, and Bucky applauds you for that.

It’s not long before the guy offers to go somewhere more private to discuss business and Bucky follows far behind, Sam praising you through the coms from where he waits in the car outside, watching through the camera in your earring.

Bucky waits outside of a closed office door upstairs, listening to the conversation through the coms but hearing your exclamation through the door when the guys give you his asking price.

“5 mil each?! What do you take me for, some kinda stunad?”

“Take it or leave it.”

“Take it or leave it, yeah, I can put a bullet between your eyes and take it, alright.”

“Stop messing around and take the offer, it’s not real anyway!” Sam tells you, not wanting to lose their chance on the serums.

You ignore him prioritizing your need for respect over the stupid mission, “How do I know these aren’t Kool-Aid pouches poured in glass bottles?”

“Well, I’m certainly not going to test ‘em out for you.” The guy scoffs.

“Stronzo. You’re outta your fucking mind offering me that.”

“I’ll lower the price for you if you give me a little dance, how ‘bout that?”

“Vaffanculo.” You curse at him.

“Up yours, lady!” He yells back, and Sam sees through the camera, he grabs at you.

“Buck, get in there.” Sam tells him, and it only takes Bucky a second to kick open the door.

He’s a bit taken aback when he not only sees the case of serums out on the table, but you holding the man bent over the small table in the middle of the room next to the serums, gun held to the back of his head.

He very quickly decides that you’re fine and moves to grab the serums, closing the case and holding it securely in his left hand.

“Don’t kill the guy.”

You stay silent and Bucky looks at you again. He can almost see the steam coming out of your ears and he notices a small cut on your cheek bone. He looks down to the man’s cowering figure and notices a large ring on his hand.

You mumble something in Italian to the man, a threat of some kind that Bucky can guess given how the man shuts his eyes and shakes a bit under your hold. Sam finally enters the room, military grade handcuffs in hand.

“Feds are on their way, get her out of here.” He tells Bucky.

You slowly lift the gun off the man’s head and stand up straighter, walking over to brush past Bucky in the direction of the back door.

He makes eye contact with Sam and gives him a nod before following after you, watching as you scrunch up the bottom of your dress to replace the gun in an ankle holster. Once outside, he stops you under a street light near the car and raises his hand to look at your cheek.

“We gotta get going,” You swat at his hand.

“You’re still bleeding.” He says, using his thumb to brush away the line of blood, smearing a red tinge on your skin.

He looks into your eyes and for a second he sees the tough exterior drop. The face of someone who got smacked across the cheek all for mouthing off at some asshole.

Your vulnerability doesn’t last long, though, as you sniff and walk towards the car, opening the passenger door and sitting inside before Bucky can make it over there to open the door for you.

The drive back to the apartment is silent, and Bucky doesn’t know what to do or say to fill the silence. Stepping into the apartment, you immediately go to change and collect your things. Bucky moves to the bathroom to look for a first aid kit of some kind.

He meets you in the room and you’re now in cotton pants and a large t-shirt, sandals on your feet showing the bright red color of your toenails and the lines indented in your skin from how tight your heels were. You’re hanging up the dress and zipping it back in the cover when Bucky drops the first aid kit on the bed.

“Christ, it’s only a small cut.” You mumble.

“Just - Let me, would you?”

He takes out the liquid of disinfectant and soaks a cotton pad, cleaning off your cheek bone with it before covering it with healing ointment and a bandaid.

You don’t thank him when he finishes and he huffs as he closes the kit, “When do you drop the act, huh?”

“I don’t.”

“Really?” Bucky asks in annoyed disbelief.

“No. People tend to try and have me whacked when I drop the act.”

He sighs, “So, what, nobody ever takes care of you? Treats you? You don’t have any days off? Time to be yourself?”

“This lifestyle doesn’t really allow me to have days off, Sergeant Barnes.” You snap, gathering the dress in your hands and turning to face him completely.

“Take me home, I’m tired and my feet hurt.”

You leave him in the room and he waits an extra few seconds before dropping the conversation and following you out.

...

Bucky opens the back door to the environmental facility with his right hand and sees the door to your office open, you and your crew sitting together surrounded by cigar smoke and he can hear a TV on.

“Sir, please step into the vehicle.”

“Like the cop would be callin’ this asshole Sir if the fuckin’ cameras weren’t around!” You wave a hand at the TV, not yet seeing Bucky standing there.

He finds it funny that the gnarliest criminals - the literal Mafia - spend their time watching shitty, scripted cop shows.

It’s been about two weeks since the mission with you where you retrieved the serums. Sam went to prom with your sister five days ago, which was hilarious for him, especially when he got photo prints of different sizes in the mail at his apartment. He didn’t bother thinking about how you found his address.

One of the men sitting next to you glances his way and sees him standing there, smirking at the vision of him; hair combed slightly back and to the side, and a large bouquet of flowers in his right hand and a small paper box in his left.

“You got company, Boss.” He says.

You look over to the doorway and your jaw drops in an open-mouthed smile.

“Look at googootz! Now this is a man that knows how to treat a lady, are you boys paying attention?” You tease, scurrying over to him and pinching one of his cheeks, resting your free hand on his large bicep to guide him into the room, the rest of your crew ushering out to give the two of you privacy.

“What’s in the box?”

“Cannoli.”

You throw your head back with an exaggerated moan, “You know the way to an Italian woman’s heart, Sergeant Barnes. What’s with all the gifts?”

“Thought I’d treat you.” Is all his response is.

You narrow your eyes at him and stand up a little straighter, crossing your arms over your chest.

The last conversation before he dropped you off that night hasn’t escaped his mind. He understands the difficulties of life - how it’s hard to find time for yourself among the busy schedule that is existing. He catches himself sometimes, too, forcing his body to run with no sleep, burning through all of his energy until he’s completely drained and blaming it on life.

But life’s not always like that. Life allows for days off. For treats. For a bit of kindness. And Bucky’s come to show you just that.

“What, a beautiful woman like you never received flowers and pastries before?” He says, taking a half-step forward to be close enough to look you closer in the eyes.

“Are you flirting with me?” You whisper in amusement.

His eyes glance away from yours to look down at your red-painted lips. He gives you a shy smirk, really turning up the charm. For a big, bad, boss, you’re pretty easy to break down.

“Let me take you out tonight.”

“Maybe I’ve got plans.”

“Cancel ‘em.”

“What makes you think you’re worth canceling plans for?”

“Why don’t you trust me and find out?”

“You should know by now, Sergeant Barnes, that I don’t trust.”

He doesn’t respond for a moment, setting the box of cannoli on your desk before reaching his now free hand up to your face, using his finger to brush away a stray hair and push it behind your ear.

He then takes a hold of one of your hands, turning it over to place a kiss on the top of it, before wrapping your fingers around the flowers in his other hand, forcing you to take them.

“No restaurant you’ve been to a hundred times over, no drama, no business. Just a man trying to treat a lady.” You look down at the flowers before meeting his eyes again.

“I get to pick the place.”

“No.”

“The kind of food.”

“No.”

“The -”

“No. Let me take care of everything.” Bucky insists, determined to get you to give up control for the first time in what he can only imagine has been a very long time.

Bucky knows better than anyone how terrifying it is to give up control. It was terrifying when he was forced to give up control, his free will taken away from him in the war for decades upon decades, but it’s terrifying even now when he has to do it as a free man. It makes a person vulnerable. When was the last time you were allowed to be vulnerable for somebody?

“I’m gonna pick you up here at six. Wear something nice and leave the executive attitude at home.” He finishes, leaving you with the flowers and cannoli before returning back outside, ignoring the stares he receives from you crew who wait patiently outside your office.

He feels your eyes follow him at the door, and he can’t wait to sweep you off your feet tonight.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes mob au #bucky barnes x mobboss!reader #mob au #marvel #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes oneshot #even tho bucky wants her to give up control we all know he prob likes being yelled atin italian #and that the real reason he wants to take you out

[watchmegetobsessed]

VALERIE - Part IV. (Harry Styles)

hello loves!! thank you so much for the feedbacks on the previous part, i love to see your thoughts at reactions so please keep them coming for the upcoming parts as well! i was informed that the posts weren’t showing up under the hashtags bc i had an extrernal link to the spotify playlist, so that won’t be available in the next parts, but you’ll always be able to find it in the masterpost if you’d like to give it a listen! those were the songs i listened to while writing the story! now, i dont want to keep you up any longer, here is part 4, one of my personal favs, and im excitedly waiting for your feedbacks on the post! have a wonderful reading!

word count: 4.5k

SERIES MASTERPOST

masterlist

Valerie is curiously watching her dad work on the portable bed they’ve brought over for the night, her little hands clutching onto Rosa’s shirt as she is telling you all about the list she has made for you. It’s not a long one, but you try to focus on every word she says, making sure you won’t mess anything up.

“I put an X behind the important ones,” she explains pointing at the paper and you nod, eyes roaming down on the few X’s on the list. “The other ones are just suggestions, things I thought you should know.

“Got it,” you nod again, biting into your bottom lip. Bath time, feeding, sleep time, everything is covered in the list and you’re happy she even mentioned the smallest details. Some things might be natural for her as she’s been doing it for months, but it’s your first time completely alone with a baby. You surely don’t want to mess this up, especially because you want her to trust you and let you look after Valerie more often. They deserve a break now and then.

Steven finishes the bed and backs out a few stuffed animals along with two blankets into it, making it look cozy and familiar for Val.

“But most importantly,” Rosa starts and you look her in the eyes. “Call us anytime if you need help or want us to take her home, and I mean it.”

“Not gonna happen,” you shake your head, earning a sigh from your sister.

“Y/N, I’m serious. We are thankful for the help, but it’s not your duty, alright? Just call us anytime, really.”

Nodding your head you flash a smile at her, knowing well nothing on Earth is gonna make you call them tonight. Okay, maybe there are some cases when you would call, but those are quite unlikely to happen.

She hands Valerie over who curiously eyes you before grabbing a handful of your shirt and making herself busy with the fabric.

“It’s gonna be fine. Have a great night, you deserve it,” you smile at them. Steven straightens up and curls an arm around Rosa’s waist as they watch Val in awe, clearly a little worried they are gonna spend an entire night without her, but you can tell they also can’t wait for some alone time.

“Alright, we should get going,” Rosa sighs and stepping closer she kisses Valerie’s head and then your cheek as well. “Have fun with your aunty! We’ll be back for you in the morning, Sweetie.”

She runs her hand over her little head and Valerie smiles at her happily, completely oblivious to what’s really happening. The joys of being just a baby!

Steven says goodbye to her as well and you all head to the door. 

“So, we’ll be here around eight, she is usually up by six. Do you want us to pick her up sooner?” Rosa asks standing at the front door.

“Sooner? I was about to tell you to sleep a little longer, you don’t have to come so early.”

“But we don’t want to take away your whole day, you need to rest too,” Steven explains, worry all over his face.

“Stop worrying about me, I’ll be fine. Just enjoy your night off! Come on, I’m throwing you guys out, time for the sleepover to start,” you tell them, shushing them out the door. 

It takes some time to finally get them to leave, but they eventually do. Then it’s just the two of you, alone for the first time.

“Ready for your first sleepover, Val?” you ask her, standing in the hallway of your apartment. She just stares back at you, saliva drooling from her mouth but even that looks cute on her. “Alright, let’s do this.”

You braced yourself for the worst. Thought about all the possibilities how the evening would go, but you hoped they wouldn't become reality. Unfortunately, baby Valerie had different plans for the two of you.

The first hour goes by fine. You feed her, have a little play time, reading her favorite book to her, but slowly, you notice her losing interest in anything and everything. Soon enough, you see her face distort into a grimace and a few moments later she starts crying and it’s straight downhill from there. 

Nothing can get her to stop. No food, no toy, absolutely nothing. You clown around, trying everything that pops into your mind that would calm her down, but it doesn’t seem like she is about to stop anytime soon. 

You start to panic. Rosa told you how fussy she is because of her teeth coming, but you didn’t think it would be this bad. When she’s been crying for an entire hour straight, for a split second, you think about calling Rosa. 

“No, not gonna do that,” you say, while Val is still screaming in your arms. “Valerie, what do you want? Tell me and I’ll give it to you, I promise! Just please stop crying!” you whine desperately, but, no surprise, no answer comes from the screaming babe in your arms, just more tears, puffy eyes and red cheeks from all the crying she’s been doing.

Trying to rock her into calmness you are moving around in the apartment when you hear your phone ringing. You instantly think it’s gonna be Rosa, wanting to check in on you, but how are you gonna answer the call when Valeries is screaming from the top of her lungs? She’ll come to pick her up straight away, no doubt about that.

Rushing into the kitchen you are relieved to see that it’s just Harry calling you.

“It’s not the best of times, Styles,” you sigh as you answer the call and put him on the speaker, leaving the phone on the countertop, so you have both your hands free for Valerie.

“Hey, I was just-- what the fuck is happening?” he asks hearing the deadly cries of Val through the line. “Is that Valerie?”

“It is! I’m looking after her so Rosa and Steven can celebrate their anniversary, but she just wouldn’t stop crying! I don’t know what to do!” 

You’re absolutely desperate. It’s so bad you can feel your throat closing up, nearing the edge of your patience, tears threatening to roll down your cheeks, but you tell yourself only one of you can cry at a time and Val has taken that spot quite some time ago, not even giving you a moment to let loose.

“Text me your address, I’m leaving now,” he orders and you snap your head towards the phone.

“What? No, Harry--”

“Just text me the damn address, Y/N!” he barks and the line cuts off right away. 

Your desperation pairs with shock now, not knowing what to think about this short, but quite eventful conversation you just had with him. It takes you a few moments to collect your thoughts, but you end up sending him your address. 

Nothing changes in the twenty minutes while you are waiting to hear anything from Harry following your text to him. Valerie keeps crying with three seconds of pauses when she takes a few deep breaths only to start screaming once again. Aside from the headache she is causing you, it’s becoming pretty impressive how long she’s been doing it. You probably would have fainted by now, but it seems like Valerie is running on an endless battery.

“You are really making it hard for me to be a cool aunt, Val,” you mumble, the baby still in your arms as the tears keep rolling down her face. Your light grey shirt is now soaking wet, both from her tears and your sweat from the anxiety she is giving you, mixed with some other things you choose to ignore where they came from.

The doorbell makes you jump, but Valerie doesn’t even bat an eye at the sound, she just keeps going.

“You need to teach me how to have this much energy,” you mumble under your breath as you walk over to the door. 

Opening it you find yourself staring up at Harry who is wearing a brown coat, dark jeans and a black hoodie. If you had to guess what he was doing on this weekend evening you would have said he was out with friends somewhere, picking up girls, but he surely doesn’t look like he was anywhere else than his home, the clothes are hanging messily on his frame, like he just threw them on in a rush.

His green eyes look straight at you at first before moving over to the crying child in your arms. You fully expect him to say something along the lines of “this is the kind of effect you have on others” comment, but it seems like he notices the fear and despair in your eyes and he keeps his mouth shut.

“I honestly have no idea what to do,” you choke out and the tears start flowing from your eyes as well, making Harry have to deal with now two crying human beings.

“Oh my, please don’t cry, I can’t take two crying women at once,” Harry begs as he steps inside and shuts the door behind him. Turning to face you he reaches for Valerie, you hand her over to him, hoping she would magically stop the crying, but she clearly couldn’t care less.

“Why, can you take one?” you ask with a bitter chuckle as you wipe your cheeks.

“Not really,” he admits, making you smile. “So what have you tried?” he asks as he starts swaying and rocking Valerie in hopes of getting her to stop, but not even Harry’s charm stands a chance with her right now. Deep down you’re happy you weren’t the reason she got so fussy and upset, would have been pretty awkward if she stopped the moment Harry took her into his arms. 

“Literally everything,” you huff, shoulders falling forward. “I went over the list Rosa gave me, tried everything, but she wouldn’t stop. She’s teething, but this is… It seems like there might be something else maybe?” you tell him worried that something serious might be behind her behavior. You really don’t want to call and bother Rosa, but you are nearing the point where you’ll give up and ask for help.

“Maybe she needs to be changed?” Harry suggests holding her up, giving her butt a sniff, but you roll your eyes at him.

“You don’t think that was one of the first things I did? She is as clean as she could be. Maybe I should just call Rosa,” you sigh in defeat reaching for your phone but Harry snaps at you.

“No! Don’t, we can figure this out. Steven has been so excited to have a night off, we can’t ruin this for them. Come on, we have to have the slightest parenting skills and solve this without them.”

Nodding you agree with him, but you’ve completely run out of ideas.

“So what do you suggest?”

You can see the gears turning in Harry’s head as he is trying to come up with a plan, but it’s not like either of you have any experience with babies. The idea of calling Rosa is starting to burn in the back of your head, fear of failing this challenge taking over your thoughts.

Then Harry looks at you with a look that screams that he has an idea. You’re just about to ask what came into his mind when all of a sudden he starts to sing.

“Well, sometimes I go out by myself and I look across the water, and I think of all the things what you’re doing and in my head I paint a picture…”

You instantly recognize Amy Whinehouse’s iconic song, the one that’s also behind Valerie’s name, you know that for sure. Rosa was obsessed with the song growing up, she would sing it on the way to school, in the shower or while making dinner. You weren’t surprised she chose this name for her first daughter.

What surprises you that Harry sings like a literal angel. He hits the notes perfectly, nailing the lines like not many can and you listen to him with parted lips, eyebrows raised. This was the last thing you expected from him, but then again, it’s not the first time Harry has surprised you through the years of knowing him.

Valerie stops for a moment, her hiccups shaking through her body as her tear-filled eyes look up to Harry, and you both think this is gonna be the moment when she finally calms down, but he doesn’t even reach the chorus before she starts crying again, a defeated sigh erupting from him.

“Maybe she wants it instrumental,” you suggest and Harry gives you one of those ‘are you fucking kidding me?’ looks as you leave to run down the hallway, right into your bedroom.

“How am I supposed to make it instru-- what the hell, Y/N?!” He gives you a weirded out look when you return with a guitar in your hands. “Since when do you play the guitar?” 

“Since like… eighth grade,” you tell him as you sit on the couch and holding the guitar on your lap you try to find the right accords. “I told you, you know nothing about me.”

Harry nods with a surprised but amazed look on his face as your fingers strum against the chords. It takes a few minutes but you figure it out and glancing up you give a questioning look to Harry.

“From the start?” you ask and he nods his head, continuously bouncing up and down to try to calm Val down.

You start playing the song and soon enough Harry joins you with the singing, the two of you perfectly nailing it even without any practice.

“Stop makin’ a fool out of me, why don’t you come on over, Valerie?”

Maybe it’s the guitar, maybe it’s the singing or maybe the fact that the song has her name in it, but by the time you reach the halfway point in the song Valerie’s crying slowly starts to fade. You instantly share a look with Harry, but don’t stop, fearing that she might start again if the music stops. 

Her tear soaked cheeks smooth out as she is not screaming anymore and you can actually see her irises finally, her long lashes are sticking together from the salty tears and you know it’s gonna take some time for her to regain her normal state, but at least the crying has stopped. 

“‘Cause since I’ve come on home, well, my body’s been a mess. And I’ve missed your ginger hair and the way you like to dress…”

You tear your eyes off Valerie for a second, letting yourself wander over Harry’s features as he sings. He slightly furrows his eyebrows focusing on the lines, so his forehead has a few creases on it. His lips form the words so clearly and elegantly, you wonder how often he sings. Is it something he only does when he is on his own or he likes to perform as well? 

The only time when you heard him sing was at the bar when the two of you slayed the karaoke machine with that Avril Lavigne song. You were smashed by then, you remember that he had a nice voice but it was the last thing you paid attention to. Besides, he was kind of equally drunk as you, it was all for just fun, but now is a completely different situation. 

It’s no surprise Valerie finds his voice soothing, you’d probably stop whatever you were doing if you heard him sing. There are people with a good voice and then there are the ones that not just have a good voice but also that small something, that extra magic in them that makes you melt as their voice caress your ears. Harry is definitely the second case, for a moment you forget where you are or why he is there singing. It’s just his voice and the gentle strumming of your fingers on the chords. 

At the end of the song he starts repeating Valerie as the song slowly fades into nothing and you both stare at the little girl in his arms, clearly afraid she might start crying again. Unfortunately, your reservations become valid when you see the corners of her mouth curls down and you and Harry share a shocked look immediately.

“What else can you play?” he urges as Val whimpers in his arms, letting you know she does not appreciate that the singing has stopped. 

“Shit, shit! Um, something from ABBA?” you propose and Harry nods quickly, not even asking which song you know, so you take it as a sign that he probably knows all of them.

The first song that comes to your mind is Andante, Andante and you don’t hesitate to start playing again, just in time. Valerie was just about to start crying again, but as soon as the melody hit her little ears she calmed down and listened to it with tired looking eyes.

“Take it easy with me, please. Touch me gently like a summer evening breeze…” Harry sings the words and you can’t hold a smile back as he, once again, hits the notes just perfectly without missing a beat.

You’re convinced there’s not one person on Earth who has never heard a single Abba song, most of the population knows them by heart, but somehow you couldn’t really imagine Harry to be a person who knows the lyrics to the songs as well. But he does and sings it without messing it up even just once. It’s hard to imagine a younger version of Harry singing ABBA songs when they come on the radio, but the more you think about it the more the picture paints itself in your mind.

Valerie lays her head to Harry’s chest, stuffing her thumb into her mouth as she listens to the performance. She is probably enjoying the vibrance of his voice shaking through his chest and maybe this is what brings her the peace she’s been looking for all this time. Your heart skips a beat at the sight of them.

Harry glances at you, eyes so soft you melt under his gaze. However nerve wrecking it was to have Valerie scream for hours, she is still the cutest little thing ever as she rests her head on his chest, her long blinks giving it away she has definitely lost most of her energy. 

You don’t dare to stop the singing and playing. When you near the end of a song you quickly think of something else and whisper it over to Harry, who then gives his feedback on it with either a nod or a shake of his head. Most of the time he knows the songs you suggest so the show continues without a stop. 

Half an hour passes by when you see her eyes slowly closing. You still don’t stop though, only when Harry tries to listen to her breathing and he realizes that it was completely slowed down. She is out.

“Holy shit,” you breathe out quietly, your fingers feeling numb from the playing. You haven’t had a guitar in your hands for this long in a while, probably for years. Harry shares your relief, his throat has completely dried out and he is happy to finally breathe evenly, not just sneak a few breaths in between lines. 

“And now what?” he mouths as he is still gently swaying around with the sleeping Valerie in his arms. You put the guitar aside and check if she is for real asleep. Her long lashes are spread out on her puffy cheeks, gently snoozing into Harry’s chest as if she weren’t screaming for dear life just an hour ago. 

“Let’s put her down,” you whisper and nod at him to follow you. 

Reaching your bedroom you only switch your bedside lamp on so the light doesn’t wake her up. Pushing the stuffed animals to the side you grab the blankets and let Harry do the critical job. Leaning down he oh so slowly starts to pull her away from his chest, careful not to move too suddenly, it all feels like in those action movies when they are trying to get through the lasers without triggering the alarm. One bad move and the screaming threatens to start again and that’s the last thing you want, after all you’ve done to calm her down. 

You don’t even realize it but as you watch her little head reach the mattress you hold your breath, almost wincing upon seeing Harry’s hands slide out from under her sleeping frame. As if you wait for something to go wrong, both of you freeze for a moment, expecting her to start moving around and wake up, but she stays still. 

Eyes snapping up to Harry, you exchange a look and then you both head to the door, careful not to make any noise that can possibly shake Valerie up from her dreams.

“This was more tiring than running a marathon,” he huffs, throwing himself to the couch and you do the same next to him. 

“Have you ever run a marathon?”

“No,” he confidently answers and you look over at him with a puzzled look. “But I can imagine how tiring it is.”

You let out a chuckle, letting your eyes close for just a little bit. You haven’t even had the chance to realize how much this whole struggle with Val sucked the energy out of you, but now that you’re half lying on the couch it hits you all at once.

“I should get going,” you hear Harry mumble, clearly just as tired as you are, but he doesn’t move. 

“Mhm,” you hum, feeling yourself drift to sleep.

Neither of you moves and it doesn’t take a whole five minutes for the both of you to completely doze off.

The next time you wake up you feel an arm curled around your waist and someone is definitely pressed up against you while your back is against the back of the couch. It takes you a couple of moments and some blinking to realize it’s Harry you are all snuggled up to and the reason why you woke up is because Valerie is crying again. 

“Shit,” you mumble to yourself, mind still groggy from the sleep as you push yourself up on the couch. Just moments later Harry’s eyes flush open and you’re not sure it’s because of the crying or because you moved next to him. His arm slides off you as he looks around a little confused about his surroundings.

You don’t have the chance to think about how the two of you ended up cuddling on the couch, though it lingers in the back of your mind. Basically crawling over Harry you rush into your bedroom where Valerie is lying in her bed crying. It’s a different kind of cry, not like the one you were stuck with for hours before and you know she must be hungry.

“Ah, come on, little girl. It’s alright,” you coo at her scooping her into your arms. She immediately cuddles to your chest hiccupping against it, her little hands fisting your shirt. You leave to go to the kitchen and feed her, but just as you’re about to step out of the room you bump into Harry.

You bounce back from his chest, but his hand immediately reaches for you and grabs your arm, holding you in case you might fall back.

“Sorry,” you breathe out, thoughts still foggy a little. “She’s… hungry,” you explain, but he is standing so close to you, you can feel his body’s warmth and it instantly ignites the memory of being pressed against his side on the couch just moments ago and you can’t stop yourself from inhaling a shaky breath. 

“Let me help,” he croaks out and the two of you walk into the kitchen. Putting on her bib you hand her over to Harry who sits with her on his lap on a stoop as you get the baby food, warm it a little before joining the two of them and you slowly start feeding her.

“What time is it?” you ask realizing you have no idea how long you two have been asleep on the couch.

“It’s three am,” Harry answers before smiling down at Val. “Good job, Val!” he hums watching her take the spoon into her mouth.

You finish up feeding her, then give a try at burping her even though Rosa said it’s not necessary anymore. She just hums to herself so you head back to the bedroom, her eyes already threatening to close. By the time you put her back to the bed she is out again, so no private show is needed this time.

Walking out of the room you see Harry putting on his shoes and coat. For a split second you feel disappointed that he is leaving, but then your rational side puts you to your place. Of course he is leaving! Val is fine now, there’s no other reason for him to stay, right?

“Harry,” you softly say and he looks at you. “Can you please not tell Rosa and Steven that I needed help with Val?” you quietly ask, though there’s no doubt your eyes are practically begging him.

“No way I’ll ever admit to Steven that I sang ABBA to his child, so don’t worry about it,” he chuckles making you smile as well. 

“Thank you. And for helping me as well. I was really close to giving it up,” you admit folding your arms on your chest as Harry stands at the front door, hand on the door knob as he is looking back at you.

“No problem. Now you owe me one,” he smirks and you can’t hold yourself back from rolling your eyes.

“Sure,” you say with an airy chuckle. “Good night, Harry.”

“Good night, Y/N,” he smiles at you sweetly before opening the door and walking out. 

You take his place at the door and watch him walk down the eerily quiet hallway. He turns back to you one last time waving in your way and you nod back smiling before he disappears around the corner.

Closing the door you lean your back against it, taking a deep breath. Your eyes wander over to the couch where you and Harry were sleeping not so long ago. The feeling of his arm around you is still burned into your mind and you breathe in shakily as a memory snaps into your head of the exact same thing, only years earlier.

You lied almost exactly like that in his hotel room that night. His strong arms wrapped around you as you had your head laid on his chest, listening to his heartbeat that was slightly faster than the normal. Though you were still quite drunk, this feeling imprinted into your memories, because you felt so safe with him. Like nothing could ever hurt you if he was there with you.

Unfortunately, that feeling faded into nothing when you woke up in the morning quite fast. But this time, instead of disappointment and disgust, the only thing you still feel is the emptiness at the lack of his touch. 

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[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Peter Parker’s Younger Sibling

Peter Parker x sibling!reader

warnings: bullying mention, blood mention

a/n: a fuckin reach, its been a WHILE since ive seen tasm

prompt: y/n is peter’s sibling

peter and you were playful kids

you were just a year and some months younger than him, so you had a harder time remembering your parents than him

but he always told you stories about them that made you miss them a little more

peter was a genius, we all know it

he was the one helping you with your homework most nights

“peter i cant do it!”

“that’s okay, y/n. look, start with two times four, that’s eight, then four times six, twenty-four, right?”

“can i say a cuss word?”

“sure”

“math is shit”

you would cry during homework a lot

you’d also pass out on his floor after talking for hours

and you’d either wake up facedown on the floor or in your room since uncle ben would pick you up and put you to bed

peter took it upon himself to take you back to your room, but he usually dragged you by the arm, sooooo

you’d play action figures together

he was batman, you were robin always

“can i be batman?”

“oldest gets to be batman so im batman”

“but i wanna be batman!”

peter walked you to your school before taking off on his skateboard

and he’d pick you up on his way home

on half-days your brother taught you how to skate

you fell a lot

aunt may had to patch you up

“how many times do i have to tell you those skateboards are dangerous?!”

peter got you your own skateboard so that you could practice without him

you would text him after you did a trick and he’d always say hell yes! show me when i get home!

being his photography assistant

really you were his assistant constantly

science fair was the most boring day of the year

“y/n, stand right here, i need to get something from my locker”

*judges walk up while youre left unattended and in a state of PANIC*

you were bullied in middle school, same as peter, he’d always stick up for you and get beat up instead

it made you very mad but it was scary, too

“how’d you get into this fight, peter?”

“oh, you know, just happened”

“peter was sticking up for me, uncle ben”

“was he now? you’re a good brother, peter”

lonely when he moved onto high school :/

but you got there soon enough

you guys were kind of loners, just ate lunch together, lugged around your skateboards, you were an artist, he was a photographer

just spectating the chaos of high school, rolling your eyes at the drama

“i have two bucks, do you want anything from the vending machine?”

“uhh, a coke?”

you saw peter get bullied by flash and lost your shitttt

you actually started a food fight after throwing mashed potatoes in his eyes

“what the hell, parker?!”

“sit down and eat your goddamn food, flash, or next time it wont be potatoes”

peter was half-proud, half-embarrassed

trying to see how long you could skate through the halls before any authority figures stopped you

sometimes......you guys got sent to the office together :)

*phone ringing* “hello, is this ben parker?”

“which one of them is it this time?”

the principal’s office was a trip sometimes

you and peter exchange your glances and wait to get scolded

“ah, the parkers, come in, lets have a chat...why do you two always feel the need to get in trouble together?”

“we just happen to get along really well for siblings”

no you fuckin dont lmaoooo

it was always something with you two

like always

*banging on peter’s door* “I KNOW YOU HAVE MY BROWNIES, PETER, GIVE THEM BACK”

*peter through a mouthful of brownies* “I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT, YOURE CRAZY”

“is that my jacket?” -peter

“you mean my jacket?”

“y/n, i swear to god if you steal any more of my clothes it’s over for you”

“well, aunt may keeps giving me your clothes, so take it up with her”

and then there was just the little annoying things

“peter, can you stop clicking your pen?”

*clicks pen faster*

“you’re the worst”

and my personal favorite

“peter, open the door”

“why?”

“emergency”

*opens bedroom door* “what?”

“aunt may is making meatloaf”

“shit, uh...get your board, we’ll skate to mcdonalds and tell her we already ate”

peter and you RARELY ever brought your parents up until he found your dad’s briefcase, you didn’t have much to say

soon he was flooding his room with conspiracies and pulling you in to explain them

he began acting REALLY weird, but he was pretty open with you, he told you he went to oscorp

“YOU SNUCK IN??”

“your standards for me are way too high, y/n”

soon you started to feel not-so-good and weird things started to happen

“peter??”

“yeah? whats up?”

“this is gonna sound really weird...my hand is stuck to the door”

“it happened to you, too??”

“happening, pete. wait—this happened to you?? what is this???????”

yall done fucked up and got bit by spiders peter had so carelessly brought back into the house

it was an adjustment to say the least

and this adjustment got a whole lot harder that one night...you can remember peter just...so upset

you tried to chase him out to make sure he was okay, but uncle ben told you to stay with your aunt

maybe if you’d have been there...it would’ve been different, but when the cops got to your house you were at a loss for words

peter was covered in his blood still

“hey, hey, just breathe, okay? it’s not your fault, peter. just hop in the shower, yeah? i’ll take care of your clothes”

when peter took your advice and you were left alone, you just cried, you cried until he finally found you curled up in a ball in your room

then he cried, you just hugged each other sobbing your eyes out

peter got distant for a while, which was rough since the two of your were mourning for your uncle and dealing with these newfound powers

sooner or later he came around and helped you out, designing webshooters and a suit for you

“we match?”

*sigh* “yeah...yeah, we match”

ah yes, spider-team

you really tripped out new york at first, they thought spider-man was a teleporter

peter was still talking about your dad, but you really didn’t care, uncle ben was always going to be who raised you

you and peter would be covered in bruises after going out

“uh—peter punched me”

“y/n???!!!”

“I PANICKED”

just being dumb scared teens that cant function to save their lives until they get a little bit lucky

seriously like, every big villain you guys fought was just the worst

peter didn’t help all the time, he was good at provoking them sometimes

“hey, spider-man, you mind shutting up for a minute? for my sake?”

“sorry, sorry, just couldn’t help myself!”

he gushed to you about gwen stacy, he actually dragged you to her apartment to be patched up by her SEVERAL TIMES

yadda yadda yadda peter graduated high school! how cool is that? but he was late (what a surprise) even though you put off spidering today just for this

but he made it and you clapped the loudest for him

“thats my brotherrrr!!!”

cute family picture! (aunt may printed a bunch of them and gave them to you two and peter pinned them to his wall)

you and peter actually have a lot of pictures of the two of you just goofing off

he has one of you stuck in a trash can that cracks him up every time

seeing harry osborn again after YEARS

“wow, y/n, last time i saw you i just thought you were peter’s annoying little sibling”

“aww, it’s good to see you, too”

electrooooo

this guy really worried you bc like, bzzzz shock

you and peter weren’t equipped for that

it took a while, but you were finally able to deal with that

and several other problems

including peter’s breakup, which was a whole ordeal of its own

*peter laying upside down on your bed* “i dont know, y/n, you know? i wanna be with her so bad, i love her...but her dad is haunting me”

*you, drawing on your notepad with your legs propped up on his* “yeah, makes sense”

you actually had to tap out during the end of electro, you were hurt pretty bad

“y/n, hey? yeah, you’re okay. stay here, just stay right there, i’m gonna be back for you”

*thumbs up to show youre still alive*

but when peter came back for you there was bad news, he’d lost gwen

he ripped his mask off and fell to his knees, you could barely move but you powered through it, giving him a hug while he cried

“we...we better get home before aunt may starts to worry”

she was at work, so you two had the place to yourselves to clean up and mourn before the official news was revealed

“i should have listened to her dad, y/n, this is all my fault”

he was a mess, you couldn’t bare seeing him like this. it’s been so long since you’d seen him like this

the funeral was rough, peter was grasping onto your shoulder the whole time

he insisted that he was going to stick behind and stay with gwen for a while

“okay, i’ll see you at home...love you”

“love you too”

you gave him a hug and left him to his business, the next few months you were the only spider-person operating in new york...until rhino popped up

“im coming with you”

“you’re sure?”

“yeah, im sure”

(these are kinda ass but anyways im tagging my marvel ppl even tho ik this isnt mcu so just ignore this post if you dont care, sorry!!)

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @allthecreativeonesaretaken // @frostedgiant // @praellee // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs //

#peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #peter parker #spiderman #spiderman imagine #spiderman x reader #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #andrew garfield #amazing spider man #amazing spider man x reader #amazing spider man imagine #parker!reader #peter parker x sibling!reader #peter parker x sister!reader

[wthzoe]

chapter 5 - don't let it bring you down

"but don't let it bring you down and turn your face into a frown"

series masterlist - here

previous | next

a/n: wrote this right after i posted chap 4 and it's already 4 am 😃 im still not sleepy rip. so as i said, ive been writing the whole night so i don't know if this chapter makes sense sksksks

-

Kuroo had a volleyball game coming up in two weeks which made him busy after school. He hadn’t been able to pick up the triplets from daycare and look after them. As for you, he only saw you in the mornings and briefly during classes as they had volleyball practice even during class hours. To say he misses you is an understatement. He even went as far as setting the picture he secretly took of you as his lock screen wallpaper so that you were the first thing he sees when he turns on his phone. He made sure to be careful as to not let a stranger who doesn’t know of your circumstances see it.

Akaashi approached Kuroo who was sitting on the floor with his head tilted back. The curly haired male handed him a bottle of water before sitting down next to the bed haired one.

“Bokuto and I could feel how much you miss (Y/N) from a mile away.” Akaashi bluntly stated.

“Really, now.” Kuroo replied, too tired and (Y/N)-deprived to think of a snarky reply. He chugged down the water Akaashi gave him and stood up to leave. “Well, I’m going first.”

“We’ll be going, too.”

With that, all three of them went back to their respective homes. Upon arriving home, Kuroo went straight into the bathroom to shower in able to go straight to bed. Stepping out of the shower topless while drying his hair off with a towel, he fishes his gym bag for his phone only to be met with anything other than the said device. He felt his heart race. Just when he had something to hide in there, he just had to lose his phone. He poured out the contents of his bag into his bed and he felt the fatigue in his body leave him.

Meanwhile back in the university, a student who had business in the gym saw a phone light up. She picks up the phone and turn it on to try to identify the owner. The lock screen was a photo of a woman carrying what seems like a two-year old baby. She takes a closer look and was finally able to identify that it was you.

Back home you were doing your homework when you hear a series of knocks on your door. Opening it, you were met with Kuroo looking quite jittery and pale. You furrow your brows before asking him what was wrong.

“I, uh. Can you do me a favor? My phone’s missing and I’m pretty sure the location’s on.”

“Oh, sure, sure. Come in. Do you want some water?”

“I’m fine but thanks anyway.”

The two of you work together to locate his phone and he was so relieved to find out that it was just in the university, most likely in the gym. Then he remembered what he had set as his lock screen a few days ago. He quickly thanked you then rushed to pick his phone up, silently praying that no one saw his wallpaper. He didn’t think that you’d be ashamed of your sons, but then you didn’t really seem like you intended to tell people you’re not close to seeing as people usually don’t have anything nice to say. He wanted to respect that decision of yours but because of him losing his phone you might have a hard time. When he got to the university his phone was at the lost and found which only means that someone had seen his lock screen. Fuck.

The next day rolled around and you were in Kuroo’s backseat with the triplets as usual. The two of you drop them off at the daycare and when you went back to his car, he seemed paler than before. He was also tapping the stirring wheel repeatedly, something he does when something is bothering him.

“Tetsu,” the way he flinched at the sound of your voice had you even more worried. “Are you okay?”

He debated whether he should tell you what he’d done. If by chance someone did see it and the news had spread, it’d be his fault and there was a big chance that this would be the last time you’d talk to him. However, he didn’t want to keep it from you and wait before you find out yourself. He sighed, here goes.

“Listen, (Y/N). I just want to say that I’m sorry in advance,” your brows furrowed, heart beating faster. “Why don’t you go grab my phone then turn it on.”

You do as he says, eyes widening at the candid photo of you and Masao. It was surprising, but you didn’t get what was making him so troubled.

“Remember when I left that behind at uni last night?” He glanced at you to check your reaction. Your expression remained confused. “I got it from the lost and found. So, that being said… it’s highly likely that someone saw that lock screen.”

It took you a few more seconds to get what he was saying and then, oh. Oh. You got it. There’s a big chance that at this very second, people would be talking about you and your sons. You didn’t know whether to laugh or what. It was like high school all over again. You were sure of one thing, though. You were scared. Scared of having to walk through the hallways with all eyes on you, hearing their whispers. The disgust and disappointment evident in the way they looked at you.

Your silence made Kuroo even more tense. He couldn’t read your expression from the little glances he’s taking as he drives. You carefully place his phone back where it was before speaking.

“Oh.” You reply shortly. Tears were starting to pool around your eyes and you were sure your voice would break if you speak. You didn’t want Kuroo to see you being weak and worry so you turn your head away from him. He took this as a sign that you were indeed mad at him, his heart broke thinking about how he ruined everything between the two of you.

When you arrived you quickly stepped out of the car and walked ahead. Usually, Kuroo would open the door for you then you’d walk together, but of course, today would be different. Maybe even the following days, weeks, months, years. Who knows? All Kuroo knew was that he fucked up and he’d driven you away from him.

You wiped away your tears before entering the building. Just as you’d suspected, almost everyone was looking at you weird and whispering amongst themselves. You were even able to hear one of the few things they said.

“I heard that the child looked like it was already at least two, that means…”

You clenched your fists and carried on. When you entered the classroom, you were surprised to see people sitting down in their respective seats quietly. Too quietly. You expected the classroom to be the place where there’d be more people talking about you. It still didn’t change the fact, however, that some others have their eyes on you.

“Mornin’, (Y/N)!” Bokuto greeted. You smiled back at him curtly. Akaashi was looking at you with worry but you didn’t notice as you immediately sink into your seat.

Classes dragged on longer than it used to and lunch became unbearable as you decided not to join your three friends. Instead, you lock yourself in a bathroom stall, head tilted back as you try to stop your tears from falling. You thought you’d be safe there but you were proved to be wrong when at least four girls entered, gossiping about ‘that freshie who already has a child.’

‘Please, let this day end already.’ You thought.

When the classes were finally over, you went straight home instead of at work, wanting nothing else but to wrap yourself in your blanket and cry yourself to sleep. You didn’t even realize that you haven’t picked up the triplets from the daycare when you’d fallen asleep.

Kuroo was staring at your number on his phone, debating whether to call you or give you space. When he was about to turn his phone off and shove it into his gym bag, he felt it vibrate. However, instead of your name popping up like he hoped, it was an unknown number.

“Hello?”

“Ah, Sir Kuroo! I’m the triplets’ teacher. Ms. (Y/N) hasn’t come to pick the boys up. I know it’s only been twenty minutes but Ms. (Y/N) is never late unless she calls to say so. She wouldn’t answer her phone either. I was hoping you could check up on her.”

He felt his heart beating faster. “O-okay. I’ll pick the boys up on the way as well. Thank you for calling me.”

“Okay, I’ll have the boys ready. Have a safe drive, sir.”

The call ended and Kuroo slung his gym bag on his shoulder. He turned to Bokuto and Akaashi who were also taking a break from practice.

“Guys, I’m going ahead. The triplets’ teacher called, apparently they haven’t been picked up yet and (Y/N)’s not answering her phone. Cover for me.” He didn’t even wait for their response when he practically sprinted to his car.

When he picked up the boys, they were staring at him with a curious look on their faces. Kuroo wasn’t able to pay mind to it as he couldn’t stop thinking about you. After the three were safely seated in their car seats, they drove to where you worked but alas, you weren’t there. Your boss explained that you didn’t come in that day and that usually you’d call when you weren’t coming in. This didn’t make Kuroo feel any better at all. The only place he knows to check was your apartment.

Back at your apartment you’d just woken up, panicking when you saw that it’s already dark out. You tried to recall if you even picked up the boys. When you remembered that you didn’t, you sprung up. Muttering a string of ‘oh shit’s, you run out of your room. You were about to open the door when someone from the other side beat you to it. Kuroo was standing in front of you, hands on the triplets’ shared stroller. Without a word, you grab the stroller from him and slammed the door on him. You were 100% sure that there were clear traces of the breakdown you had earlier so in fear of having Kuroo see you in that state, you had no choice but to cold heartedly slam the door on him.

Once again, Kuroo Tetsurou’s heart broke.

#kuroo x reader #kuroo imagine #kuroo imagines #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo tetsuro imagines #kuroo tetsuro imagine #kuroo tetsurou x reader #kuroo tetsurou imagine #kuroo tetsurou imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu scenario #haikyuu au #haikyuu #with a smile series

[dumbcuckbucket]

i uhh wrote a thing and i just need to put it somewhere and forget it exists.

no one talks about the ugly nights when youre chronically ill. you hear about the bad nights, the dangerous nights, and occasionally even the good nights. but you rarely hear about the nights when someone lays awake in bed, crying from pain that they cant stop and wondering why the fuck they deserve to feel this way.

why am i, at twenty, so tired of living in so much pain all the time, that im questioning life? not in a suicidal way, let me make that very clear. ive been actively suicidal before, and this is different. i want to stop existing, but i dont want to die. i simply want to stop hurting.

why is it that when the sun comes up and ive gotten little to no sleep, my body still screaming in pain, must i pretend i am okay? brush it off as simply a life i am used to and thats that. i am used to it, but why must that be okay? why must i exist this way?

around nine i will roll out of bed and pretend my joints dont burn and that my head doesnt weep and act as if i havent spent the better part of the night terrified of how my illness will affect my future and silently sobbing about it. i’ll feed my dog and take him out. there’s some fresh air. its nice, but i’m tired. i want to lay down again.

i’ll shower, which will take so much of my energy that i do not have anymore. i’ll make phone calls. it seems like all my life is is phone calls, and then spaces between calls where life moves around me and i make no progress. i’ll call my doctor and ask for blood tests to see if my meds are working. i’ll call a different doctor to make sure my referral was granted by my other doctor. if it hasnt been, i’ll call that doctor.

i have an appointment at 11. its supposed to help. im getting screened for adhd and other mental disabilities that may be affecting my studies. what doesnt affect my studies anymore? im stressed about work, im stressed about my family, im stressed about covid and money and my studies and i am so tired. its supposed to help. i am already so resigned to hear that theres nothing wrong, because nothing is ever wrong if i dont fight and get different opinions. i am so fucking tired of fighting. i hope i get the help i need, because i dont think i can keep trying to get it.

my mom died. did i tell you that? two years ago, right after i moved away for college. her birthday is in 9 days. i wish i could talk to her. its hard, holding resentment for someone because of how they treated you while missing them so deeply it feels like a bullet wound.

her funeral was weird. it never really hit me that she died. i mean, i know shes dead. ive known. but when the treatments stopped and the cancer spread, she died long before her heart stopped. i wish i had better memories. i know there had to be good ones there, but i only remember the bad and the dying.

its crazy that of all the things that could be wrong with me, its chronic shitting disease. it feels like a joke. trying to talk about a chronic illness in almost any setting is hard enough. imagine that chronic illness relating to poop. it sucks.

after my appointment i have to go pick up a prescription. i hope it helps. it needs to help, because i am so tired of doctors and phone calls and the ever piling list of meds that dont work. having medication lists sent to new doctors and having to say “no i stopped that one when i started this one” and “that one didnt work” over and over and over gets exhausting. i don’t remember half of the meds they name anymore.

my roommates dont understand. i wish they did. they dont realize how hard it is for me to brush my teeth, let alone cook and clean. then to have to socialize with them at the end of the day feels like pulling teeth. i love them. theyre my best friends, my tether to life when i feel like im floating while the world moves without me. i just wish they understood.

i’ll try to go to class after i get my prescription. i’ll log on and ignore it, like i always do. i’ll lay down in bed with my computer muted, looking through twitter or looking at etsy. anything to not deal with the real world for a few minutes. the real world is so exhausting.

im still crying, but its fine. this is my life, its how it is. im used to it. its okay. (a lie, but a good one).

i’ll call my dad. i’ll lie when he asks how i am. i’ll tell him im tired because i havent slept well this week (lie of omission). he’ll ask how im feeling. i’ll tell him im fine (a direct lie). ill tell him about my appointment and my new inhaler and all the calls ive made. i’ll make a joke about how much it all fucking sucks (not a joke, but my tone doesnt let the truth out). he’ll tell me about his days off. he’ll tell me about work, and the grocery shopping he did, and how he still has laundry and that he hasnt done anything in the garage yet. he’ll tell me what hes making for dinner. i’ll say it sounds good (a lie; nothing sounds good to me anymore) and i’ll say im jealous (a truth; i miss his food). we’ll sit in silence for a bit, then he’ll say “well i gotta get going” and we’ll say goodbye. he’ll say i love you. i’ll say it back (the final truth). one of us will remember something to talk about. we’ll say goodbye again.

i’ll lay down again, and while the sun is out i wont think about how much i hate this. how i, at twenty, dont deserve this. how i have had my future robbed from me so i can make calls and appointments and run through a mile long list of medications.

my dog will lay down with me, and i will feel guilty for not taking him to the park to play.

i’ll remember i have to pay rent. i get up to do it. i bring my dog, and we go to the park. he runs himself hard, so we only stay for half an hour. we’ll go home, he’ll be happy, and i’ll be exhausted. i’ll go lay down and vaguely think about my school work. i wont do it. i’ll let my roommates decide what we do for the night. i’ll try to make some food, or order something. they’ll make fun of me, not realizing it hurts that they dont see that being alive is so hard for me. they dont understand, but thats okay. it has to be okay.

ive stopped crying. my knees and ankles and elbows and fingers still hurt. my stomach churns and my head is pounding, but im used to it. its okay. it has to be okay.

#mine #my post #jes talks #jes writes #chronic illness #crohns #long post #suicide tw #not suicidal but it is mentioned #death tw #ask to tag #personal #okay to rb

[fragmentedink-archived]

Hell to Pay: Chapter Twenty-Three

I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX, X, XI, XII, XIII, XIV, XV, XVI, IX, IX, XX, XXI, XXII

Cowritten by @lux-scriptum

A/N: trigger warning for smut, and for Excessive Levant Crying

In the few weeks that passed, they settled into a sort of rhythm. Having a schedule seemed to calm Cameron down, and Lev had to admit it made him feel better too. He knew what to expect, to an extent, though Nik and Eden found ways to insert variety into their lives along the way.

Lev shifted, adjusting his pants grumpily. He’d been perfectly happy to use Eden’s naptime to fall into bed with Cameron and Nik, but when Nik cheerfully shoved a plug in his ass after they’d both fucked him, Lev knew exactly which one he’d used. Nik hadn’t turned it on yet, but Lev knew it was only a matter of time before he did.

Lev paused outside Eden’s door. He could hear her babbling inside, so she was definitely awake, but Lev was surprised to see that there was only one sentry at the door. He thought about asking, but Eden’s volume was increasing every second he hesitated, clearly unhappy about being left to her own devices. When he looked inside, she was already sitting up, a dewinged bat stuffed animal in her clutches.

She screeched at him, waving the two halves of the toy at him.

“We really should stop giving you stuffed animals,” Lev muttered. He scooped her up, humming softly. He checked her diaper, and made quick work of changing her before replacing the tattered stuffed animal with a rattle. He got smacked on the head with it for his troubles. “Why are you so mean to your Da, hmm?” He asked, sliding out of the room. “What have I done to deserve this?”

That was apparently funny, because she giggled and tried to bite his shoulder.

“You’ve been around Cameron too long. No biting of the people. Especially your Da,” Lev scolded, heading for the kitchen. Most likely where the other two would be, anyway.

He didn’t quite make it. Amara appeared out of nowhere, spinning him around. He tucked Eden close and pulled away, huffing at her.

“What are you doing here? And be careful. She’s still little,” Lev scolded, checking Eden over. He got his finger bit for his troubles, before Amara caught Edens attention. Eden reached for her, and babbled angrily when Lev hushed her.

“I’m here to kidnap you,” Amara told him solemnly, before poking Eden’s nose. “Damn. He even makes cute kids. Think he’d spare me some DNA to knock Cin up with?”

“Amara,” Lev said, exasperated.

“Yes?” She asked innocently.

Lev sighed, and edged around her. He flicked a wall of shadows up in Amara’s face when she tried to follow. Her annoyed squawk was worth the payback he was sure would follow. She was still on his heels by the time he ducked in the kitchen.

“Amara’s kidnapping me for the day,” he said tiredly in lieu of hello.

“Damn right I am. You abandoned me for a pair of cocks and I’m insulted. Impressed, but insulted.”

“You should be,” Cameron said without hesitation, starting across the room. “You’re not taking him.”

Lev was quick to push Eden in his arms, both to stop Cameron from strangling his cousin, and because Amara had hooked a finger in Lev’s belt loop determinedly. “Yes, I am,” she said sweetly. “Promise to return him with minimal damage, but he needs a day away from this insanity.” She settled her chin on Lev’s shoulder.

“Yes, because your insanity is that much better,” Cameron replied dryly.

“Hey,” Lev tried. “I don’t mind, really.”

“Yeah, and you didn’t mind almost dying, either,” Cameron retorted.

“What, and you’re not kidnapping me too?” Nik demanded from the counter.

“Nah,” Amara said dismissively. “Not today, Saint Nikolas.”

That didn’t seem to amuse Nik, who muttered, “See if I ever feed you again.”

“Fuck you,” Amara said cheerfully. “You let my sister sleep under the same roof as him.”

“Would you rather she sleep in the street in the middle of winter?” Nik retorted.

“She has other family, you know,” Amara said. She pulled away from Lev, grabbing him by the scruff of the neck. “Come on, buddy, we’ve got things to do. Motorcycles to terrify you with. Takeout to make you order.”

Both Nik and Cameron looked disgusted with her food choices. Lev waved at them. “I’ll be back tonight,” he called as she yanked him out the door. “If I’m not please come get me.”

He barely heard Cameron’s response of, “Give her food poisoning,” before Amara marched him past some very grumpy looking sentries and out to her bike. The poor thing was old and more worse for the wear, but according to Amara it ran. She stuffed Lev in a leather jacket to keep him warm, and handed over a helmet. He almost told her off for not wearing one herself, but it’d never worked in the past, so he just sighed and pulled his on.

“Drive slow?” he asked.

Amara just laughed at him.

----

For the next five minutes, Nik watched Cameron feed Eden before he ended up saying, “So…. she just walked in here. How do you feel about that?”

“That she’s lucky she’s Lev’s cousin because I would have broken her legs otherwise,” Cameron replied, feeding a spoonful of meat to the happy babbling demon baby wiggling in her high chair. “Won’t be able to walk in if her legs cease to function.”

“You know she does it just to get a rise out of you,” Nik said.

“You make it sound like I care.”

“I mean,” Nik said, taking a drink of his black coffee, “you clearly do. Since Lev had to put the baby in your arms before you went through her. She must have gotten under that icy white skin of yours.”

Cameron flicked his cool pale blue eyes at him. “No. She just needs to learn where she can and cannot open that fat mouth of hers. And she cannot open it in my house where I will feed her to my guards.”

Nik made a face. “I do not imagine Lev would be too fond of cannibalism against his cousin,” Nik mused. “Me neither. I am rather fond of my fuck buddies.”

Cameron’s mouth twitch clearly was a figment of Nik’s imagination. “And I do believe that function is now obsolete.”

“Be as that may,” Nik said. “I am still attached.”

“Why.” But before Nik could answer that rude question, Cameron said, “Never mind. She’s just as bad as you are. Two peas in an annoying pod. My mistake.”

Nik clicked his tongue. “You charmer. Are you like this with all your boyfriends. Oh wait, I forgot, you refuse to acknowledge this not relationship. My mistake.”

Before Cameron could respond with one of his irritatingly famous quips, Eden smacked her hands down on the tray, screeching at both of them for daring to take her attention. Cameron flicked her nose. “Stop it, I’m feeding you, aren’t I?”

She babbled angrily at him around the spoonful of food Cameron shoved in her mouth. Cameron pointed at her, eyes narrowed into a glare. “I am literally right here. Stop screaming and use your damn indoor voice.”

“She’s a baby.”

“So are you and I managed to train you to not yell in my house.”

“You’re so cute. Using pet names,” Nik said, batting his eyes at him. “What else do you got for me? A darling? A sweetheart? A my love?”

“A broken neck?” Cameron offered.

Nik pouted and went to top off his coffee. “I thought babies made the heart grow fonder.”

“That’s absence,” Cameron corrected. “Open a book once in a while.”

“I read.”

“Pornography does not count.”

Nik tried kissing Eden’s cheek, but got smacked by her. He bit down on her shoulder lightly before resting his chin on Cameron's shoulder. “You both are so mean to me. I can’t believe it, I thought I was her favorite.”

He knew Cameron rolled his eyes. “Her favorite is literally anyone that gives her attention at any given moment,” he said. “A complete stranger could give her point five seconds of attention and she’d have a new parent.”

“Here I thought I brought a special something to our relationship.”

“You didn’t, don’t worry.”

Nik bit down on Cameron’s shoulder. Hard enough to break the skin. “Asshole.”

Eden was laughing at them both between bites of her food. Cameron’s only response was, “If you’re going to bite, make sure I can actually feel it.”

“See, if I did that then you’d be naked right now.”

“So confident,” Cameron said, getting another bite in before Eden refused any more. He went to pick her up and Nik followed them back to the nursery. “I’m sure you’d like to believe that.”

Before Nik could respond, he felt his pocket buzz. Nik cut Cameron a withering glare before pulling his phone out to see a text from Lev.

Lev: How’s Eden?

Nik wrinkled his nose and watched Eden wrestle and kick at Cam while getting cleaned up.

Nik: Trying to put her foot thru Cam’s stomach

Lev: Bitty girl not happy she has to get clean?

Eden screeched angrily while Cameron wiped down her face with a baby wipe. Cameron blissfully ignored her temperament and went about continuing to clean her up.

Nik: Something like that. At this rate she’s going to end up eating the baby wipes. I’m sure it’ll be fine

Lev: Try making faces at her. She thinks she’s being ignored

Nik relayed the message and Cameron rolled his eyes. “Or she’s just being a brat because there’s a baby wipe on her face and she’s being forced to get cleaned up.”

“Well,” Nik said, “I’m sure you are capable of telling Lev that.”

“So are you,” Cameron said, sitting Eden up. “You’re the one with the phone.”

Eden shoved her fist in her mouth while babbling and kicking her feet. Nik frowned when he looked back down at his phone. Amara apparently had stolen Lev’s phone.

Lev: Stop distracting Lev.

Nik: Im sorry but LEV distracted ME fiRST

Lev: 🖕

Nik: Very mature, Mar. Nik: Also Cam said he was going to feed you to his guards if you keep walking in the house like that

Lev: mmmm sexy Lev: Stop distracting me. Shutting off the phone now

Nik shoved his phone in his pocket and moved out of the way while Cameorn went to the dresser to get another black long sleeved onesie after stripping Eden down. “Amara’s holding Lev hostage. I think he wants help.”

“He’ll be fine, I’m sure,” Cameorn said, dismissively. “He’s the one that went with her. And as often as Amara claims, she can protect him if something happens.”

“I mean help from her.”

“Well that is a pickle,” Cameron said, scooping a newly clothed Eden up. “Oh well. Come on, you little monster. I think it’s playtime with some toys that don’t make any noise.”

Eden was looking at Nik over Cameron’s shoulder while they started for the living room, and clawing at Cameron’s skin contentedly. Nik hummed. “Her eyes are turning green.”

“I saw,” Cameron said. There was a faint tone in Cameron’s voice that Nik wasn’t quite able to place. “My mother has the same ones. So do my brothers. It would make sense she would too.”

“Would you rather she didn’t?”

“I don’t care either way.”

Nik knew better than to not press any further. “What toys we playing with,” he said, starting for the closet with all the toys. “I bet she wants to play with the piano.”

“I bet she doesn’t.”

----------

Lev locked the door behind himself and huffed. Amara was ten times worse than he remembered. Or maybe Lev was less in the mood to deal with her shenanigans. He settled on the bathroom counter and pulled out his phone. In less than a minute he called Nik, hoping that would calm him down before he did something like pick a fight with Amara he knew he couldn’t win.

It had been hours now, and he wanted to hear Nik’s voice.

“Hello, Levant. How are you?”

Oh. Oh he sounded too cheerful for Lev to trust that.

Lev swallowed his pride and said, “I made a mistake.”

“Oh?” Nik asked, amused. “And what’s that?”

“I should have just let Cameron snap her neck,” Lev moaned. “Come get me? Please?”

Nik’s voice got distant, as if he had pulled away from the phone, but Lev clearly heard him say, “Hey, Cam, Lev said you can snap Amara’s neck.”

“Nik,” Lev blurted. “I wasn’t serious.”

Again Nik’s voice was further away as he said, “Wait, no. He changed his mind,” before saying to Lev, “You can’t just tease him like that, Lev.”

“Nik, please,” Lev tried. “I wanna come home.”

“Okay, but you chose to abandon us for Amara. You could have just stayed with us and the baby but you decided to leave on your own accord.”

Lev felt his bottom lip tremble, even if it was a stupid reason to cry. “I was trying to keep the peace. Cameron looked like he was going to hurt her, and I- It was the quickest way to get her out of the house. I didn’t think she’d be this bad.” He sniffed hard. “Nik, please? I don’t wanna be here.”

Nik was quiet for a moment, before he said “Sure. I’ll be right there.”

“Thank you,” Lev said softly.

“No problem. But I suggest staying in there until I come or else Amara will never let you leave.”

Lev made a noncommittal sound, and just said, “Love you,” before he hung up.

After a few moments there was a knock on the door. Lev sighed and slid off the counter. When he opened the door, Amara leaned against the doorframe. “That bad, huh?”

Lev burst into tears, but she just pulled Lev into a hug and led him to the couch. He wasn’t sure how long he sat there sniffling, but he woke up to Nik leaning over to smother his face in kisses. Amara was gone, thank the stars, so Lev gave a grumble and tried to pull Nik down on top of him. Nik let him, settling on top of him so he could kiss Lev properly. After looping his arms around Nik’s neck, Lev sighed softly, kissing back sleepily.

Lev noticed Amara’s approach just seconds before she smacked the back of Nik’s head with a rolled up magazine. “Not on my couch, you bastard,” she complained.

Nik looked up at her, sticking his tongue out. “You’re just jealous.”

“Of you fucking my cousin? No. Just grossed out. I don’t wanna see that. Go home and fuck him if you want to so bad. Not like he wants to stay here anyway,” she retorted.

“I’m- I didn’t mean to offend you,” Lev started in a small voice, only to squeak as Nik shoved his hand down Lev’s pants.

“Dunno, Mar, he seems fine to me.”

Lev dug his nails in Nik’s wrist, giving a small, mortified, “Nikolas.”

That at least distracted Nik, who bit down on Lev’s throat. “Mm?”

Lev bit back whatever sound was trying to escape him and said, tightly, “I wanna go home. I’ll blow you or something, but not on my cousin’s couch while she watches.” Even Lev’s newfound exhibition kink had its limits.

“Yea, yea. Sure. Let’s go.” Nik smacked a kiss on Lev’s cheek before pulling away and standing. Lev stood more slowly, adjusting his clothes. He slid a hand in Nik’s before looking at Amara.

“Thanks for not killing me,” he said, lightly.

“Meh, maybe next time,” she teased back. “Get out of here and go get some dick, before you stink up my apartment more.”

Nik resisted Lev’s attempts to push him out the door long enough to shoot back, “Speak for yourself. You have sex just as much as me.”

Lev sighed in relief when he got Nik outside. He quickly burrowed into Nik’s side, and said, “Cam’s not annoyed with me, is he?”

“Nah. He has the baby to be annoyed by,” Nik said, leading the way to a sleek black bike. Lev pulled to a stop, eyeing it with distaste.

“You rode a motorcycle here?” He asked, more defeated than anything else.

“No. I walked here.”

Lev caught the helmet Nik tossed at him just barely, and sighed. “Of course you rode a motorcycle.”

“Only the best for you, babe,” Nik promised.

Lev huffed. “Somehow this feels like a punishment,” Lev muttered as he pulled the helmet on.

“Now why would I do something like that?” Nik asked.

Lev shook his head, and just motioned at the bike. Might as well get it over with. He climbed on behind Nik, wrapping his arms tightly around him. If Lev didn’t know better, Nik smiled at him over his shoulder.

“Hold on tight,” Nik said.

Lev shoved his face against Nik’s back, and didn’t open his eyes for the rest of the ride.

----

Nate had shown up right as soon as Nik had walked out the door. Right before he disappeared, Nik had told him that he was off to rescue Lev from Amara. If Nate hadn’t known better, he’d have thought Lev had purposefully tried wiggling his way out of training with him. But he did know better, which is why Nate now found himself sitting on Cameron’s living room floor with a six month old wiggling demon baby chewing on a pair of toy keys.

He still couldn’t believe that this little girl was created from the same DNA as Cameron of all people, but she was right here, the spitting image of him, despite the wide smile on her face and her hazel-green eyes. Nate poked her nose. “You are the cutest little shit,” he said, fondly. “I bet you make Cameron’s life hell.”

Eden babbled happily at him, waving around the keys, clearly in agreement with Nate’s assessment. Nate found himself smiling and poking her belly. “Goooood.”

“You can play with the baby without talking,” Cameron said, from the chair. “Or are you unable to be quiet like your brother.”

“I am physically incapable of doing what you want,” Nate replied, rolling onto his back to put Eden on his belly. “If that means talking nonstop, so be it.”

“What does my brother see in you?” Cameron mused. “Clearly it’s on a physical level because I cannot see otherwise.”

“That’s because you have the emotional intelligence of a rodent,” Nate said, wiggling Eden’s toes. “Isn’t that right, baby?” Eden squealed and smacked his stomach, nearly falling on her face, had Nate not been holding her in place. “Mmm. See?”

“Yes,” Cameron said, “I’m going to take the word of an infant. Great idea.”

Nate decidedly ignored whatever it was Cameron said next, and kept playing with Eden until Nik and Lev decided to grace them with their presence. Nate tilted his head back and looked at Lev who opened his mouth before instantly snapping it shut, eyes bright with apology. “Nate. You- I forgot- I am so-”

Nate said, “Nik, take the baby.” His brother was already moving before he had the whole sentence out. When he was to his feet, Nate smoothed down his shirt. “It’s okay,” he tried. “We all forget things, and honestly, who wouldn’t want to forget training?”

“Bay,” Cameron said, instantly.

Nate rolled his eyes at him. “No one asked you.”

“Well, you clearly asked someone.”

Nate ignored him and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Are you going to be able to train today?”

“Do I have a choice?” Lev winced, adding a small, “I’ll be fine.”

Nate gnawed at his lip ring. He wasn’t sure how to suggest they not do it, if only because he also wasn’t the biggest fan of training. He wasn’t exactly the best warrior, and he had no intention of being one, but he was of the right temperament to be able to help Lev, and he supposed that was why his mate had suggested it be him to do it. He was likely the one to go the easiest on him. “If… it makes you feel better, it’s not exactly my favorite hobby either. We could… skip for the day, if you want?” Lev did look like shit, but Nate wasn’t going to say that.

Lev shook his head. “No,” he said, “Bay’ll be mad at me if we don’t.”

“Bay’ll live,” Nik said. “We can protect you.”

“No,” Nate said, cutting his brother a look. “What’s going to happen if by some chance Lev is alone without either of you there to protect him? Hmm? Demons would chew him apart.” He gave Lev an apologetic look. “But we can take it easy for today. Work on magic?”

Lev nodded. “Okay.”

“Well, we already know he can make buttplugs,” Nik said, bouncing Eden.

He had never seen Lev move as fast as he had when he whipped around to look at Nik like he was insane. “No? That was Silas.”

“My mistake,” Nik said, dryly.

Lev flushed a bright gold, when he turned back to Nate. Nate forced himself to not smile at the mortified look on Lev’s face. “I’m sure you can do great things with your shadows. Why don’t we go ahead and head to the gym to find out?”

“Okay,” Lev said.

Nate gave him a small smile and led him back to the gym. It was just as pristine as the rest of the house with state of the art equipment, which clearly made sense considering both Nik and Cameron’s… extra curriculars. He went to sit in the middle of the training mat with his legs closed. “Show me what you can do,” Nate said. “I want to see how they work.”

Lev looked around a bit, before wenting to an unlit corner and just… disappeared. No.. he pulled the shadows.. Around himself. Nate’s brows shot up and he went to get up to inspect. Nate couldn’t see him- he wouldn’t be able to see anything if he hadn’t known that Lev was there. He could still smell his magic, still sense it; the same sweet angelic scent that all angel magic had.

The shadows started fading away and Lev’s golden eyes eventually reappeared. “I’m pretty good at hiding when I need to,” he said, sheepishly. “It just doesn’t do me much good in a fight.”

Nate smiled at him, pleased. “Well,” he said, “it’s been my experience that a good defense is sometimes just as good as a good offense. There’s no point of a fight when you can’t defend yourself and you just need to be able to defend yourself until you get to safety. Or in this case, to either Nik or Baylor. Or me.”

“Or Cameron,” Lev said, solemnly, clearly not realizing that Nate had left Cameron off that list intentionally.

“Okay,” Nate said, starting back for the mat. He settled back down on the floor and looked up at Lev. “So we know you can hide well. Can you make things with your shadows? Or solidify them somehow? If you can’t fight with them, then you could put up a wall and run. It’ll slow down any attackers.”

Lev was flushing a bright gold while he settled down in front of Nate. “Silas and I made a little progress with that but that was fifty years ago.”

Nate bit at his lip. “And you haven’t tried anything since?”

Lev looked down at his hands. “We… a lot of the stuff we did, I haven’t… we didn’t do it in the training room. I didn’t find anyone I could trust with that until recently, and I don’t like failing, so I haven’t tried. Sometimes when I’m annoyed with Amara, I can… throw some in her face, but it’s not.. Super substansial. It never has been.”

Training through alternative methods, or sexual methods, did seem right up Silas’ alley, Nate supposed. It was also up his, as well. But he did not think that particular training method would go well for anyone involved. Least of all him, unless he wanted castrated by his mate. But he was far too fond of his cock to even attempt it, even if he wanted to. “Well,” Nate said, biting his thumb nail. “I do not think I could help you with that kind of training. I’m sure Silas would want to, but I’m sure neither Baylor or Cameron would allow that, and I’m sure Silas would not go against my mate’s word. But I’m also sure that neither Nik nor Cameron would be against helping you, uh, train.”

Lev had gotten golder and golder with each word before nearly being as gold as his eyes by the time Nate finished, staring at him wide eyed. He gave a very faint, “I couldn’t ask that of them.”

“I’m sure it wouldn’t be too much trouble for Nik,” Nate said, dryly. “He’d be very eager to help.” Nik was almost as bad as he was, if not worse than he was when it came to finding reasons to fuck around. Nate just had more self control on the matter. Besides, his mate definitely would not do that, just because he actually enjoyed training. So abusing magic for the sake of getting laid was not in the cards. Though, he didn’t know how his particular brand of magic could be used for sex- unless Baylor felt like getting fucked by a ghost. Or straight up dying.

Though-

Knowing his mate-

Lev looked so embarrassed. “I couldn’t- I wouldn’t know how to-”

“If you want, I can ask him?” Nate said.

Lev somehow flushed even more before hiding his face in his hands. Nate winced. “Sorry. Just a suggestion.”

“Nooooo,” Lev moaned, before giving a small, “Maybe?”

“I don’t mind,” Nate tried. “If it’ll help your training….”

The poor omega was so gold. “If you think I should…”

“I’m never one to suggest no sex,” Nate confided in him. “I don’t see any cons with this. Except maybe a sore ass. Though, I can’t imagine you’d be too upset about that. Not if you’re dating Nik of all people.”

Lev shook his head, head still in his hands. “Well… if you really think I should… but… Bay?”

“We’d still be doing our part,” Nate said, keeping the mild irritation out of his voice. “You’d just… be doing extra credit.”

Lev nodded quickly. “Oh I know, I didn’t mean- I know, I just, does he have to know about- about my- my sex life?”

Nate chewed at his lip ring. “He won’t know too much,” he said. “And either way he won’t care, or tell anyone. Even Silas.”

Lev finally looked up. “I didn’t think he’d tell anyone,” he said. “I guess I thought he’d not be okay with it.” Lev paused for a moment. “It’s not very… conventional.”

“Well, neither is being a hybrid raised among humans, and bound to humanity for nineteen years, but here my mate is. I don’t think he’ll care so long as you are training.”

Lev nodded a little. “Okay.”

Nate smiled brightly. “Okay,” he agreed.

-------

Cameron sat in the living room with Eden and Nik while Nate and Lev were off training until Nate finally left; but not before Nate pulled Nik to the side and Lev beelining for the wiggling infant on the floor. When Nik came back, he looked faintly amused. “Nate’ll be back tomorrow.”

“Fantastic,” Cameron said. “I’ll be at the club.”

“Your pissing contest is getting annoying,” Nik mumbled. Lev looked up at that, confusion etched on his face. “Nate doesn’t like Cameron,” he explained.

Lev’s frown deepened. “But Cameron’s nice.”

Cameron looked at him, disgusted. He was many, many things, but in the last three hundred years, no one had the gall to call him nice to his face. “Never say that again.”

“But you… are? You’re nice to me,” Lev said.

Cameron gave Nik an icy look when Nik started wheezing. “Stars,” he said, wiping away nonexistent tears. “Imagine calling Cameron nice. You’d probably think anyone that didn’t just kill you was a nice person, wouldn’t you?”

“Bay’s not nice,” Lev said, sadly.

Bay would probably be just as disgusted with this observation as he was. When Cameron said as much, Nik said, “Lev, stop talking. There is no way you’re going to win this conversation.”

Lev’s only response was pressing his face against Eden, who decided to smack Lev in the face, babbling angrily at him. Lev’s small wounded sound had Cameron rolling his eyes. “I think it’s time for bed.”

Nik seemed to perk up at that, but Lev looked borderline devastated. “I can do it.”

“I’ll do it,” Cameron said, going to stand up. “Bring her, if you want, I guess. But I’m going to do it.” Cameron didn’t give either of them the option to argue with him and started for the nursery. He had a routine and he was not going to let Lev’s hormones get in the way of it.

He let Lev change Eden into her pajamas but ended up taking her from the angel, saying, “Go get prepped for bed while I put her down.” Nik was already walking out of the room, pulling his shirt off. Cameron said, “Your turn.”

Lev handed her over, but not before getting on his toes and rubbing his cheek against Cameron’s and kissing the top of Eden’s head. Cameron refrained from wiping his cheek on his shoulder from the feeling of goosebumps jolting through his skin. “Night, bitty girl,” Lev said, to Eden before following after Nik.

Cameron wasn’t sure what to think of that nickname, other than the fact it wasn’t all that creative. She was an infant, of course she was small. But he elected to not say anything and just lightly bounced Eden while he went to sit in the rocking chair.

Her small hands clenched at his shirt while Cameron coaxed the bottle of formula into her mouth. She latched onto it like a starving man in the desert, but started settling against his chest while sucking at the bottle.

Cameron pressed his lips to the top of her head, inhaling the pure baby smell mixed with her scent. He tried not to think about how she happened to share the same eyes as three members of his family, that apparently despite this, she was supposed to look like him, though, he couldn’t see it. But perhaps that was just wishful thinking on his part.

----

Lev took a thorough shower, less because he needed one desperately, and more because he was relieved the day was over. He finally took out the plug, now that he had the chance to, and left it on the bathroom counter while he scrubbed himself down. Knowing how long Cameron took to get Eden to sleep, Lev figured he had the time to just enjoy himself.

“You're taking too long and I want attention.”

Nik’s voice startled Lev. He jerked, almost slipping, and whipped around to find Nik watching him, having poked his head behind the curtain.

“I was- I’m almost done,” Lev promised. He slicked his hair back and blew a drop of water off his nose. “Give me a few minutes?”

Nik pouted, but sulked off to the bedroom with a petulant, “Fine,” two fingers already in his ass. Lev watched him go, eyes wide. He turned off the water despite what he’d said, and fumbled for a towel. After drying off hastily he slipped into the bedroom and bounced onto the bed beside Nik. Nik didn’t even look up from where he was presenting himself, fingers still deep in himself. Lev ran his hands up Nik’s thigh, and then said curiously, “Can I...?”

Nik gave a soft moan, and just gave a “Yes,” which was hot enough in itself.

Lev nudged Nik’s hand out of the way and settled more comfortably as he slid a couple fingers in Nik. He didn’t get very far before Nik opened his eyes and looked at him.

“Use your shadows,” Nik demanded.

Lev blinked, hand stilling. “I- are you sure? I’m not- I’m no good- It’s not gonna be good.”

“You're only going to get good if you can learn how to satisfy me.”

Lev grimaced, but pulled his fingers out, eyeing the slick that coated them.

“Lick them clean,” Nik said, catching Lev’s eye.

Even though he could feel his face heating, Lev obeyed without thinking, sucking his fingers in his mouth. He held Nik’s gaze, taking his time. Once he was done, he braced his hands on his knees and reached for his magic, tugging shadows into existence. He ran them along Nik’s side, unsure if it was even tangible yet.

“You’re doing good,” Nik said, humming softly. “But make them a little stronger, Lev.”

Lev flushed. “I- I’m- okay,” he said faintly, digging his fingers into his knees. He slid them further, winding down Nik’s thigh curiously, before nudging them up. “I- can you even feel anything?” he asked, letting them vanish.

“A little,” Nik said, nodding.

Lev took a small breath. And then another. And then another, less small breath. His nails left indents in his skin as he summoned his shadows again, running them carefully along Nik’s skin. He was just starting to push at Nik’s hole with all the caution he could muster when he realized Cameron had appeared in the doorway of the bedroom and was leaning against it with his arms crossed.

Lev went gold, his breath catching. His shadows jerked forward, more solid than they’d been all day, shoving into Nik. Nik choked on his next moan, but Lev had already let his magic vanish.

“I can’t,” he said, scrambling back. “I- I can’t.”

Nik was panting as he said, “What’s wrong? You were doing fine.”

Lev shook his head. Once again he dug his nails into his knees, trying to figure out how to explain. Before he could put his thoughts in order, Cameron was at his side, uncurling his fingers with a firm, “Stop.”

Lev pressed his palms against his thighs instead. “I don’t trust myself not to hurt you,” Lev finally said. “I’m not good enough yet. I’ve never- I don’t use them on people.”

“That’s half the fun,” Nik joked.

At the same time, Cameron said evenly, “You’re not going to hurt us.”

Lev shook his head again. “You don’t know that. I don’t have any sort of control over this. I don’t- I can’t and I won't use them on you before I know I’m not going to fuck up and do any sort of harm.”

Cameron shrugged. “That’s your choice, but you’re not going to hurt us. We’ve both been through worse.”

It wasn’t until Lev wrapped his arms around himself that he found the words he wanted to use. “I don’t like having the opportunity. I can’t. I can’t.” He didn’t think Cameron really understood why this bothered him so much, and he didn’t know how else to explain it to him. He looked over at Nik, who was sitting up by this point, and tried not to cry. “I’ll- I’ll fuck you if you want something in- if you want me in you, but- I’ll just keep working on my magic with Nate, I think. At least until I- I trust myself.”

Nik leaned over and kissed him softly. “It’s okay.”

When Lev crawled into his lap, Nik wrapped his arms around him. Lev rubbed his face in Nik’s neck, and sighed. “Do you still want sex?”

Cameron snorted from beside them.

Nik ran his hands down Lev’s back. “I always want sex.” His hands drifted lower, grabbing at Lev’s ass. “How about I ride you? That seems fair.”

Lev nosed under Nik’s jaw before nipping at his neck shyly. “Okay,” he said softly. “I can do that.”

tagging: @idreamonpaper @incandescent-creativity @livvywrites @halstudies​ @alittleyellowdinosaur

#hell to pay #writeblr #writers on tumblr #ch: cameron #ch: nik #cameron and nik and lev #ch: Nate #wip boost

[witchylixie]

stray kids reaction to you being pregnant

bang chan; 방찬:

chan had come home to you talking to someone on the phone, and usually he wouldn’t listen in, but the mention of his name caught his attention.

“what if chan doesn’t want this?” he heard you ask, and he furrowed his eyebrows. want what?

“yes, i know- no! i don’t know,” you sighed, “yes, i will tell him, i’m just afraid he’ll leave me.”

chan wondered what was so bad that happened that made you think he’d leave you.

“i’ll call you later, okay? i just, i don’t know. i want chan here and i wanna tell but i don’t think he’d want this,” you spoke, “i’ll call tomorrow, okay. bye.”

chan decided to make his presence known, “so what is so bad that you can’t tell me?”

you jump and turn around, smiling awkwardly, “it’s not necessarily bad, well- it could be? it’s a lot.”

“tell me,” he says, and you nod.

“i’m pregnant.”

chan’s jaw drops, “you’re pregnant?”

you nod, “that’s what i said.”

chan runs to you, and picks you up, twirling you around before putting you back down, “you’re pregnant!”

you smile, and his smile mirrors yours. chan sits on the bed, eye level with your belly, placing a hand on it, he smiles.

“a mini us.”

lee minho; 이민호

taking you to the hospital wasn’t something minho had ever wanted to do, but he knew he had to after you had passed out. sitting in the exam room, you on the bed, an IV in your arm, and your hand in his.

hearing the door open, you two both turn your head, and the doctor smiles.

“well, we’re gonna write you a prescription, that way you and the baby get the nutrients you both need,” the doctor speaks and you and minho both go wide eyed.

“i’m- i’m pregnant?” you ask, and he nods.

“i’m assuming you didn’t know?” he asks, and you shake your head.

“i thought i was just dehydrated,” you said, and the doctor sighed.

“most expecting mothers think that. let me get your discharge papers, we’ll take the IV out, and you can go home,” he speaks, turning around and before he leaves, he speaks again, “oh, and congratulations.”

you turn and look at minho, and you see him smiling, dazed.

“we’re gonna be parents,” he mumbles, and looks at you, still smiling, “we’re gonna have a baby that’s half you, and half me. we’re gonna have a baby!”

seo changbin; 서창빈

changbin knew that you two needed to find out if you were pregnant or not, so when he showed up at your apartment, pregnancy test in hand, you knew that he was curious.

after coming back out of the bathroom, you hugged changbin, who was standing outside.

“what if it’s positive?” you ask, voice slightly muffled as your face was buried in his chest.

he kissed your head, “then you’ll be pregnant. i’m not leaving, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

you pressed a kiss against his chest, “thank you.”

hearing your phone timer go off, you hesitantly pull away, and you two walk into the bathroom, and you pick up the test.

“it’s positive,” you spoke, and he pulled you into a hug.

“it will be okay, love,” he spoke, “think of it this way. we get to raise a mini us. we got this. we got each other, and the boys.”

you nod against his chest, “thank you. we got this. i love you.”

changbin kisses your head, “i love you.”

hwang hyunjin; 황현진

it was supposed to just be a regular checkup, some blood drawn, and then you and hyunjin were gonna go out to eat, so when your doctor asked you to stay, you got nervous.

“hyunjin?” you ask, after waiting for 10 minutes, “what if i’m sick?”

he grabbed your hand, “then i’ll be right by your side.”

hearing a knock and then the door opening, you two look at your doctor who had a smile on her face.

“we wanted to make sure before we told you two, but congratulations! you’re pregnant!” she spoke, “the front desk will give you some papers, after i give you the prescription for some medicine changes, so i’ll be back in a minute,” with that she left, and you and hyunjin stared at each other.

“i’m pregnant?” you asked, and he nodded.

“that’s what she said,” he spoke, “oh my god. we’re gonna have a kid?”

you looked away from him, “i- oh god, hyunjin, i’m so sorry.”

he pulled your face to look back at him, “why are you sorry? i’m just as guilty. we will get through this together, okay?” he said, pulling you into his chest and kissing your head, “it will be okay. we got this.”

han jisung; 한지성

jisung wasn’t one to go through your stuff, but you had asked him to find you a pen in your nightstand drawer and that’s when he saw the test.

walking back into the living room, test in hand, “uh, babe? is this real?” he asked, showing you the test, and you stumbled on your words.

“uh, may- may- yes.”

jisung pulled you up from the couch and held you close to him, “we’re gonna be parents! we’re gonna be parents!” he exclaimed, as he pulled back from the hug, and kissed you.

“you aren’t upset?” you asked, eyebrow raised.

“are you kidding? no! i’m a little scared of what chan hyung is gonna day but! i’m excited! our kid!”

jisung couldn’t stop jumping around your apartment, and he looked back at you.

“that means we gotta move in together! oh! my parents are gonna be so happy! i’m so excited!”

felix lee; 이필릭스

“chan, i’m afraid to tell felix,” felix heard you say to chan in english, and he was confused, afraid to tell him what? “what if he leaves me? he doesn’t need this right now,” felix was now even more worried because he can’t thing of any reason that he would leave you.

“it’s perfectly okay to be afraid, but you need to know felix wouldn’t leave you,” felix heard chan say, “especially not over something like this.”

“chan i’m pregnant with his child! why wouldn’t he leave? he doesn’t need this! he needs to focus on music and stays, and i’m- im just in the way,” felix heard you exclaim and start crying, and he felt his heart freeze. pregnant? with his child?

felix threw the door open, and chan and you jumped at the sight of felix, with tears in his eyes.

“it’s mine?” felix asks, and you nod.

chan gets up, “you two need to talk this out,” he says as he walks out and shuts the door.

felix brings you into his arms, trying to calm you, “i’m not leaving you. not now, not ever. you aren’t in the way. you’re carrying my child,” he speaks, slightly pulling away, resting his forehead against yours and wiping your tears, “i’m so happy.”

kim seungmin; 김승민

you and seungmin weren’t ones to get in arguments, but as you had been hiding things from him and sneaking around, he thought you were cheating on him.

“so what? is he better than me?” he shouted for the third time that night, and you sighed once again.

“i’m not fucking cheating on you seungmin!” you shouted back, exhausted.

“then what is it? what could you possibly need to sneak around for? my birthday isn’t for another five months! what the fuck a-“ he was cut off by you shouting.

“i’m fucking pregnant seungmin and if you wanna know that bad, because apparently you can’t trust me, it’s fucking yours!” after you said that, you stormed off into the shared bedroom, and looked the door, sliding down the wall, and crying.

after twenty minutes, you heard him knock, “let me in, please.”

you slowly got up, and opened the door, and he immediately hugs you.

“i’m so sorry i thought you were cheating, i’m so sorry i yelled,” he spoke, and held onto you tighter.

“i’m sorry i didn’t tell you right away, i was scared,” you spoke into his shoulder.

“i understand why, but please, never be afraid to tell me anything. i’m so happy, i didn’t think i’d want kids, but now that hearing you are, brings me a joy i didn’t know,” you could practically hear the smile in his voice.

yang jeongin; 양정인

jeongin had a hunch you were pregnant, even if you hadn’t thought about it. the way you had been throwing up, weird food cravings, and the fact you hadn’t had your period.

“hey baby?” he asked, him still sitting behind you after you threw up and you hummed, “do-do you think you might be pregnant?”

hearing this made you gasp, and made all the dots connect, “oh fuck.”

jeongin knew he needed to calm you down before you had a panic attack, “hey, hey, it’s okay. we’re both at fault here, okay? we can talk to chan hyung and go from there.”

nodding, you lean back into his embrace, “i’m scared.”

he nodded, and kissed the side of your head, “understandable. if you are pregnant, i’ll stick by your side with whatever you wanna do, okay? i love you.”

“i love you.”

#stray kids #stray kids fluff #stray kids imagines #stray kids reactions #stray kids scenarios #stray kids x reader #bang chan #chan #kim woojin #woojin #lee minho #minho #lee know #seo changbin #changbin #hwang hyunjin #hyunjin #han jisung #han #jisung #felix #felix lee #lee felix #yongbok #lee yongbok #kim seungmin #seungmin #jeongin #yang jeongin #i.n

[sichengssmile]

“Time gone by, (1)” chenle

Angst. Fluff.

What felt like an hour, was only really twenty -or-so minutes, the anxiety of waiting for your middleschool crush to arrive to a date that they asked you on, was washing over you in ten fold, self doubt clogging your mind with each minute that goes past, as you wait for Chenle.

When he approached you after school, you immediately doubted his actions; it was too fictional , the guy who you had a crush on since middleschool was now asking you out on a date, you, when he could have almost any girl on campus. That was who he was, well, who he became. In middle school he was the sweetest kid ever, but he was also subjected to some pretty harsh people because of his kind hearted lenience, causing him to be a constant target of peer pressure and bullying. Highschool changed all that, after he left suddenly and went away on exchange for a few months,never letting you know where he was, he came back with a new personality, new haircut and new agenda. He was no longer the boy that you would study with silently and mutually in the library, sharing occasional soft words and glances as you talked about assignments, he also was no longer the boy that taught you how to dance .

He became one of the most popular people on site, everyone immediately idolising him, his change and new persona was loved by all, and it got to his head. He swapped libraries for house parties, class for the skatepark, and you? He swapped you for his group; dreamies. Their name was given by the girls around school, referring to their dream-like attractiveness and social skills, you somehow couldnt let the old chenle out of your mind, as he was one of the only people to spend time with you. But you, you had also changed. The carefree mind you stuck to in middle school was switched for one of anxiousness, your appearence was important to you and you relied on friends. You hadnt spoken to Chenle in years, but had classes with him occasionally, never failing to hear the schoolwide gossip of who his girlfriend was this week.

You made your mind up to understand that he was no longer the boy you cared about, and that you had to move on. But when you stayed back after class, to practice a dance for the up and coming showcase, you bumped into jisung, one of the “dreamies”, a friend of chenles.

“Woah” was all you heard from behind you, before the door to the practice room closed, you immediately stopped dancing and ran over to turn off the music, fiddling with the device bedore the loud music stopped, allowing for the deafening silence to overtake the room. “How come ive never seen you before?” The boy asked, walking over to you quickly, you immediately noticed how tall he was, even though he was the same age as you. “You have” you said softly, reaching for your jacket and putting it on. “Where? How would i forget someone like you?” He chuckled, stepping closer again. “Park Jisung class 4, honour student early entry, beside one other person” you recited diligently. He seemed taken aback slightly. “Who was the other person?” You asked him softly, waiting for him to reply. “Y/L/N, Y/n?” he said almost as a question. You stuck your hand out. “Nice to finally meet you, Park”. It was as if his eyes doubled in size, surprise evident on his face. “So youre..- wait, how come youve never been to dance practice? I thought i skipped class but apparently you havent been to one?” You had been asked this by just about everyone else on the dance team, so you had an answer already thought out easily. “My classes overlap, so i dance after school, and go to my other course during” you smiled, making him nod in understanding. “Soo, like, youre pretty cute” his voice broke the silence. You had to physically stop yourself from rolling your eyes. “Ahah, thankyou” your confidence was crumbling as you didnt know how to act around the boy. “I dont know if you know my reputation, but, id love to take you out sometime?” He smiled, making your brain malfunction, “dude, you just met me” you said confused, making him chuckle, “i can get to know you?” He asked, going to take your hand into his. “Im good, thanks.” You began walking to your bag, stuffing your waterbottle inside before you heard his voice, “Ya jisung? Are you coming?” “Shit” you whispered, not wanting to let the boy know you were even still around, not after his pity or regret of leaving you behind. You have moved on. “Im.. in here?” Jisung seemed to be confused, not expecting to be rejected. “Whats up?” Chenle was in the room and you suddenly felt like you were suffocating. He was so much taller now, and he had a sort of confidence to him. “Nothing-“ jisung almost stuttered, looking toward you, “you sure you dont want to go out with me?” He asked, looking toward you through the mirror, chenles eyes following the youngers, finding your figure. She looks familiar. His mind was racing, trying to find where he knew this girl from. In the moments you went to walk past Chenle, Jisung called out to you, causing Chenle’s eyes to widen, but immediately go back to normal, there are so many people with that name. Hes better than he used to be, he doesnt need y/n anymore.

“Y/n wait-“

You cringed, not wanting chenle to recognise you, and to your surprise he doesnt. It kind of stung in a way, as you turned away from jisung and head out of the school, not wanting to cry again. He wasnt worth it anymore.

After two weeks of ignoring jisung at any moment, he had gotten mad, how could you reject him like that? Infront of everyone? It was embarrasing honestly. He thought back to every encounter, how chenle was always there to laugh at him, and the soft way you would look at chenle, as if you missed him, or something. Jisungs eyes widened suddenly as he realised something.

“Dude. I need you to help me out with something”

“Sure. Anything” chenles voice sounded over the other side of the phone, as he drank his juice. “I need you to invite y/n out, and stand her up. Make her the laughing stock at school rather than me.”

Chenle froze again, his juice almost slipping out of his hand as he realised what his friend wanted him to do.

“Dude? Dreamies for life right?” Jisung said over the phone.

“Y-yeah, dreamies for life. Ill figure it out” and with that he hung up, sighing to himself. He had to do this, for jisung. You probably forgot him anyway. The thought of that angered and saddened him, making him go through with the plan. You were no longer anything to do with him. He would make that clear.

That brings you to where you are now, waiting out the front of the cafe he stated, for ages. Not wanting to leave incase he turned up. But as the weather got gloomier and time flew by, any hope of talking things out, about how he left, or even him remembering who you were, was shattered. After he built you up, leading you to believe that maybe, just maybe he recognised you, that maybe he felt sorry, sad or missed you too. But no, nothing.

Your phone buzzed with a message, making your hope spike, only to fall once more.

“I remember exactly who you are and thats why I left you there.”

#chenle #chenle angst #dream #nct dream #nct angst #nct writing #nct dream angst #nct chenle #nct dream chenle #chenle writing #fanfic #kpop fanfic #chenle fanfic #nct fanfic #nct dream fanfic

[rosepetalmark]

Not in the Stars

2.5k words

Renjun x Reader

warnings: alcohol mention

in which you plan to confess your love for your best friend to him at a party, but the universe has other plans in store for the both of you. 

You like Renjun. A lot. 

That was one sentence in your five years of friendship with Huang Renjun that you never thought you’d say to yourself, let alone admit to. 

You don’t know where these feelings came from, but all you know is that they’re strong and on your mind twenty four seven. Everything he says and does captivates your mind, causing your feelings for him to grow even stronger.

It’s as if these feelings for him suddenly hit you like a brick one day. You were strictly best friends last week, and now you have these unexplainable deep feelings for him, eating you alive and begging for you to confess to him.

It’s not that you’re opposed to dating Renjun, it’s just that he’s been your best friend for several years and he means so incredibly much to you. You just don’t want to risk losing him or making things between you two weird if he doesn’t feel the same. 

So you suppress your feelings. As long as you have Renjun as your best friend, that’s all that matters, right?

Jaemin always makes you second guess yourself, explaining that the dynamic duo that you and Renjun are would be ten times more incredible if you were dating. Since you’re already best friends and know everything about each other, why not date? Only bigger and better things can come from it he always says.

Although Jaemin makes strong points, you’re still scared Renjun will turn you away, mainly because you’re ninety nine percent certain that he only views you as a friend, nothing more and nothing less. 

Yeah you have sleepovers  and spend hours late at night talking on the phone with one another, but that’s what best friends do. If Huang Renjun has any feelings for you, you’re sure someone would have said something by now. 

You get the typical stares from old people when you make your daily trek to school in the morning, him waiting outside your house for you at exactly seven forty two, smiling so bright the second you walk out your front door.  

You constantly get mistaken as his girlfriend whenever you go out together on the weekend, which always causes a deep pink blush to appear on Renjun’s cheeks. He’s always quick to brush it off though, making it clear to everyone around you that you’re strictly best friends, and that neither of you view each other in that way. 

Boy is he wrong.

Everything about Renjun makes your heart flutter, and that’s something that scares you.

For starters, he excels so well in school. For someone who spends eighty percent of his time doodling instead of taking notes, he aces every test and can recite every piece of information that’s been discussed in class with no problem.

He’s caring and funny, and so unapologetically himself. He takes you to art museums on your spare time, talks about the latest conspiracy that’s on his mind, and always insists you go for milkshakes every Sunday night.

And boy was he cute. The way he tilts his head all the way back and crinkles his eyes when he laughs makes your heart absolutely melt.

Huang Renjun makes you happy and positive and there’s nothing more in this world that you want than to hold his hand and kiss him in public, as well as call him your boyfriend so bad. 

It wasn’t until you were out late with him, hanging out on the roof at Jeno’s house, trying to escape the loudness that was coming from inside. Jeno was throwing a kickback to celebrate the beginning of summer, something he does ever year, in which there’s always too many people inside, and you and Renjun find yourself on the roof trying to seek solace in the stars. 

Renjun looked so ethereal in the moonlight. There was nothing more that you wanted to do than press your lips ever so gently against his, and hold his hand while staring up at the stars displayed so brightly above you both in the dark sky. 

“What are you thinking about bubs?” Renjun asked, referring to the nickname he gave you when he found out that’s the name you gave your favourite stuffed rabbit when you were a child. 

God the way his voice sounded in this moment made you weak. The tipsiness you both experienced earlier was wearing off, causing your lack of hydration to become present through your raspy voices. 

But you don’t care. You’re with Renjun, and you are warm and comfortable and in love. 

In love. 

You’re in love with Huang Renjun and you can’t keep it in any longer.

Maybe this would be the best time to tell him. Every time you’re completely sober, you push the idea to the side, trying your best to forget your feelings for him even exist. What if Jun doesn’t feel the same? What if he does but months down the line you figure out you’re better off as friends, and then when you try to get back into your non-romantic routine, everything feels off? You always worry that things will go wrong and Renjun will eventually stop being your friend.

Not tonight though. Renjun looks gorgeous in the moonlight and the little bit of alcohol that remains in your system is acting as your source of encouragement, convincing you to confess to him right now and hope for the best outcome possible. 

“Love,” you reply nonchalantly. 

“Love?” he questions, staring back to you, seemingly surprised with your response. 

“Yeah. Just wondering what the universe has in store for me, you know?” you ask, turning your body to face his direction, criss crossing your legs over one another. “The idea of love both intrigues me and freaks me out. It’s exciting anticipating what will come from it, but the fear of something going wrong down the line makes me not want to pursue it, you know?” you say, staring innocently into his eyes.

He cocks his head, an intrigued look falling on his face. He purses his lips, looking as if he’s going to say something, but remains silent. 

You both remain in silence for the next several minutes, which causes your thoughts to wander. What if Renjun has caught on? Maybe he’s thinking of ways to turn you down gently. Or he’s trying to express that he somehow knows you’re talking about him, and he’s trying to do so in a similar manner. 

But the silence is killing you, and you want nothing more than for Renjun to say something. Anything to get your thoughts to shut up, and your heart race to stop rapidly beating.

“I think you shouldn’t be scared of love,” he finally says. 

Taking a deep breath, he looks off into the sky, admiring the many stars laying millions of miles away from you both. “I get that you never know what may come out of it, but I think it’s worth a shot to know you tried, and to experience something you’re not fully sure is going to work,”  he speaks softly.

“Take a look at the universe for example. It’s so big and undiscovered, yet millions of people are fascinated by it. We’re obsessed with the stars and galaxies and the possibility of aliens- which I know for a fact exist by the way, yet we’re not afraid to spend our time discovering them and giving them our attention. I think of love in a similar manner. Yeah the thought seems so broad and scary, as there’s so many things to experience and discover, but I think it’s worth it. You’re only going to learn new things about yourself and life, so why not give it a shot?”

He clears his throat, and pays his attention back to you. He has a look of determination in his eyes, and that only makes you grow even more anxious.

“Aren’t you a wise expert on love, Mr. Huang,” you chuckle.

“Well what can I say? I do a lot of thinking on my spare time when I’m not bickering with you,” he laughs, positioning himself on his arms so he can get a better view of the night sky.

“Hey!” you shout, pushing onto his arm, causing him to lose his newly comfortable position and to fall on his back. “What are you thinking about Ren? You have this sour look on your face.”

“Well your idea of love got me thinking,” he says softly, staring into your eyes.

Nervousness takes over your body. You have no idea what he’s going to say, and every second of silence is eating you up.

“And?” you say abruptly, eager to know what he’s about to say. 

“I’ve been thinking about this for a while now, and I don’t know, I never thought much of it because I’m a wimp, but I think I’m going to ask Yeri out” he confesses, a small smile forming on his face. 

The mention of Yeri makes your heart sink. Yeri. He wants to ask out Yeri. Not you. 

Of course he likes Yeri. What isn’t there to like about her? She’s really pretty and polite, and they’re both the editors of the school newspaper, so they spend a great amount of time with each other. 

God this hurt. 

“Oh really,” you respond, with a less enthusiastic tone replacing your prior happy one.

“Yeah. We’ve been getting to know each other a lot more ever since we got asked to do this editorial on the basketball team, and I think I may have feelings for her”

“Well, um I think you should go for it Renjun, “ you reply, looking off into the stars to help keep what’s happening off your mind. If you look into his eyes, you’re certain you’ll start crying.

If it’s not you, you’re glad he has an interest in a girl with a golden heart and personality. 

“You think? What if she doesn’t like me?” he asks nervously, fiddling with the rings on his fingers.

“Like you said Ren, you never know what will come from love. Why not give it a shot if it’ll lead to potentially greater things not only within yourselves, but life in general? And if she ends up only seeing you as a friend, it’s okay. You’ll find someone one day who loves every part of you.”

And you can’t help but know deep down that that person is you. If Yeri rejects him, you’ll be right here to help him pick up the pieces, if not, you’ll still be here. As his best friend. Renjun deserves all the love and happiness the universe has to offer him, and despite being sad he shows no romantic interest in you, you’re glad he finds it in an amazing girl. 

“Alright cool, I guess I’ll ask her out on Monday when we meet up to discuss the paper then.” he says, smiling to himself. 

He looks so happy. Ecstatic even. You haven’t seen him smile this big since he won first place in your school’s art show.

“She’s here you know, at the party,” you say to him. “You should do it now.”

“You think?” he asks, eyes wide. 

Renjun was never one to act on impulse. He’s a man with a plan, and always has to do things by the book or else he’ll lose his hair. He likes structure and time, a complete flip from your bold and impulsive self. 

“Yeah, why not? You’re both here, you look really cute right now, and the stars are out in your favour, shining bright to provide you with the courage to do so.” 

This makes Renjun smile. You’ve always been a help in boosting his confidence, and you’re glad to be of assistance in such a nerve-wracking yet exciting period in his life. 

Standing up, he dusts the possible dirt off his legs. He crouches over, looking into your eyes and grabs your hand. “You’re the best y/n. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“As I with you,” you reply, a soft grin forming from your lips. “Now go downstairs and ask her out before she leaves.”

Standing back up, he begins walking to the door. “I’ll let you know how it goes!” he half shouts, pressing his hand to the door handle,  and making his way back into the house. 

You’re now left alone, on the rooftop, with just the stars and your thoughts. 

Why didn’t you bring up your feelings to him sooner, you thought. Now you’re only left sad and alone, because you were too scared to tell your best friend you’re in love with him. Confessing to him seemed so perfect in your mind a couple minutes ago, but sadly the universe has other plans in store for you. 

You decide to get comfortable and lie down, and begin to look at the constellations that are possibly present within the night sky. You can still hear the loud, most likely drunk people just a floor below you, and the vibration of the music hitting your body despite being away from the noise. But you don’t care. It’s just you and the sky, and you’re doing everything in your power to forget about the party below you, and to focus on the stars. 

As you point out the orion in the sky, you feel a buzz in your back pocket, indicating that you’ve got a text. Reaching for it, you unlock your phone, and see a notification stating that Renjun messaged you. Pressing on the messages app, you click on his name and read the following:

jun bug: she said yes!! we’re going out on tueday after we’re done editing :) (2:17 AM)

“Yes.” Yeri said yes. 

You’re happy for your best friend, but for yourself, you’re heartbroken. The possibility of dating him is now slim to none, especially since a potential girlfriend is in the mix, only making you more sad for yourself. 

You make sure to reply quick, and in a way that’ll make him happy, and hopefully provide you with the positivity that everything will be okay.

y/n: i’m so happy for you ren <3 (2:18 AM)

As you press send, you feel the tears start to slide down your cheeks. You’re happy for him, you really are, but you can’t help but wish that things went differently, and that you were in Yeri’s position. 

But as Renjun said before, love can be scary. It’s a learning experience, and if it doesn’t work out, you just need to take what you can from it, and hope for the best in the future. 

So you’ll take his words, and you’ll try your best to move on. 

It’ll be tough, but you hope to god that one day he’ll just be your best friend, and that this heartbreak won’t last with you forever. 

#i wrote the majority of this in one shot and i'm pretty proud #this piece is one of my favs b/c it's really relatable and I just love how i depicted Renjun in this #hope you all enjoy #huang renjun #renjun scenarios #nct scenarios #nct dream scenario #nct angst #huang renjun scenario #nct fluff

[monbebe26-monstax]

TimeLine/Update:

Hey Loves! I just wanted to share an update (or even just share with you what has been going on) since I have not gotten requests out or anything out at all. (It’s kinda long):

On Tuesday (Oct. 15) I was working at my desk when all of a sudden I got a sharp pain in my upper stomach, just below the sternum. I though “whew! that was weird.” and went back to working like normal. Shortly after I got a hot flash, another huge wave of pain, and began to profusely sweat and it was like my body just gave out. I couldn’t lift my arms or my head, I could barely breathe. I was struggling not to panic. 

Once I could, I sent ‘Help’ in an Skype IM to one of my coworkers and she quickly came over. She was scared, I could see it in her eyes, I was not okay. I had paled out, my lips were white and I was trembling while still sweating and in pain. I tried to shift in my seat but couldn’t. She grabbed our team lead who also had a moment and then quickly ran and grabbed a cold wet towel and cold water bottle. She put the towel on my head and tried to get me to sip the water, but I could barely lift the water and my breathing was very short. She ran to get a “mom” to help with a problem. The mom came back and saw how bad it was and knew I had no choice, to the doctor I go. 

First I went to the Urgent Care and that took about an hour, they said they couldn’t help me, they didn’t have the equipment so they recommended my hospital. My best friend swapped out with my coworker and brought me to the ER. After x-rays and ultrasounds it turns out I had gallstones and lots of them. They gave me a pain medication shot, prescriptions and sent me home with a follow up to a clinic that would remove the gallbladder. 

Not even 8 hours later I wake up screaming and crying in so much pain I am locked in a fetal position. I can barely move, I can hardly breathe, and my body is just sweating profusely once more. I manage to reach across the sheets and grab my phone and text my best friend (who is up and on her way to work by now) ‘ER now.’

She tried to call, several did, but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t lift myself up enough to talk or to adjust enough to get the damn phone close enough. I remember having Nunugom clutched tight to my chest as I sobbed incoherently and tried not to freak out my neighbors with screams of pain. I just couldn’t form English. Twenty minutes pass (but it feels like a lifetime) and her mom calls, I’ve caught my breath enough to answer now so I do. She says, “on your street, be there in less than 5.” 

She was, I was mid-change, mid-nausea episode as I open the door for her. Bile, straight yucky acid green bile, is just coming up and it won’t stop. I start sobbing again grabbing onto the frame of my sink trying to catch my breath before another round starts. She’s there shoving shoes towards my feet and my office trashcan in my hands. She grabs my phone, purse, and keys and leads me out. I threw up the entire 10 minute ride to the hospital and even more in the waiting room. They notice at one point I was the girl that was here less than 8 hours ago and indeed I am. They are quick, thankfully, and get back to a private room and into a gown. I’m still gripping the bed frame white-knuckled in pain, fighting down the screams of pain as they watch me struggle not sure what to do until the doctor gets there since they’ve done everything else. 

Doctor arrives, prescribes pain killers, they give me them in a shot and soon it has me relaxing just enough to breathe and be present. They do scans, x-rays, more tests and it turns out during that short time frame a gallstone had worked itself loose, dropped down into my ducts, blocked them off, and irritated both my liver, and pancreas. I am now sitting there with gallstones, fully blocked ducts backed up with sludge (which is why I was puking straight bile), acute pancreatitis, and colitis. My body is pissed. 

Within the day I had a laparoscopic procedure done and they’ve cleaned out the ducts, removed the stone, and cut enough of a slit in the duct so if one falls again it’ll let it through while they deal with all the other new issues. I am given a room upstairs and told I will be staying for an unknown time. (Still here folks, 9 days later...)

They start to treat the pancreatitis along with every thing else as well (including a fever, high white blood cell counts, vitals off the chart, etc.) and I get put NPO which means no food or water by mouth. I am miserable as the days tick by. My mouth is so dry, I’m in constant pain when they are not on time with the shots, my IVs will not stay in my skin (I had three over a course of 4 days), and they can’t seem to get any blood out of my arms for labs. 

Over the weekend my pancreatitis signs went away so they let me start to sip and nibble and I was fine, until they tried whole foods and then my body freaked out and the pancreatitis came back even worse. 

Now, I am 9 days in, with a PICC line in ( I call it the devil’s IV) and thankfully it is doing the trick of staying in and not being tugged every time I move. It allows them to put as much into me as they want while also being able to pause it any time to get blood when necessary. I am NPO again but they are allowing me to swish water to help keep my mouth from drying out so severely. I am getting better, and I am 100% grateful, but I am not near where I need to be to go home so I ask that you guys be my warriors, pray, wish, hope, and dream for me to get better. I miss you all so badly but I just miss life as well.  

[blondecarfucker]

Bed of Roses (Last Chapter - 21)

Roger Taylor x Reader

BoRhap!Roger Taylor x Reader

Fic Summary: It's 1971. You just moved to London to study, and you find a band on a local pub after a bad date. The encounter doesn’t go the way you expect it, and neither does what follows this evening as you try to deal with loving Roger Taylor.

Fic Note: So I’ve had this story in my head for the last three weeks and finally decided to write it down. It’s completely planned. It will have 21 chapters and it’s divided in three acts: Dusk, Night and Dawn. It’s will be a bit angsty in the future, and it will most likely have some smut as well. I hope you guys enjoy it! Tell me what you think about it in the asks/comments/messages. If this is your first time stumbling upon Bed of Roses, thank you for stopping by! The rest of the story is in my masterlist, the link is in my bio - can't put the link here or else the post will disappear from the tags.

Chapter's notes: THE LAST CHAPTER. I CANT FUCKING BELIEVE. i feel like before i start my thank yous i could give you some weird trivia on the story. i wrote the entire outline for the fic at a weekend shift at work, where i always have free time. i had some smaller ideas - them meeting at a bar and not seeing again, the whole kensingon-taxi-class thing from the beginning - but there was a sudden burst of inspiration and in like twenty minutes the outline was done, and very little has changed, i mostly just added some more details. also, i imagine the reader as alicia silverstone in the 90s?? idk. i just do. also, the reader thing with new york comes from the fact that i lived there for a while and i miss it so much, so thats why theres so much detail about places and stuff - its my form of revisiting my favourite spots there. also, will (REMEMBER WHEN) was written with sebastian stan in mind, and liv tyler (in her lord of the rings days) was poppy. i did too much research for this fic on queen history, and everytime i had to change something (especially in the first act) so the dates made more sense, it KILLED ME.

anyway, now the thank yous: SHIT THIS FIC IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT CHAPTER ON MY LIFE. its my first time writing such a long story without abandoning it, and my first time writing fiction in english, so i learned so much!! i was doing some research the other day, and the great gatsby is like 47k words long, and the first harry potter is around 70k words long - bed of roses is around 60k words long. this is crazy.

it's also my first story to get this many readers interacting with me, and i'm so grateful for you all!! i thought about thanking you all by name, but i dont want anyone to feel left out so i just want every and each one of you reading these words to know: if you read my story, thank you. thank you for giving me your time of the day, thank you for connecting with what i wrote, thank you for telling me in any way possible that you've enjoyed it. thank you. a writer must write, but theres not a lot of joy in talking to an empty room. you filled my small room with warmth and love and there's not enough words to express my gratitude for you all. thank you.

about my writing: i plan on FINALLY DOING THE MANY REQUESTS I HAVE IGNORED OVER THIS FINAL ACT OF BED OF ROSES - requests are still open, too! i'm also outlining a smaller roger x reader fic where she's one of the videographers on the news of the world documentary, so keep an eye out for that! i'm gonna open a permanent taglist for the requests (and eventual new fic), so if you want to be added, hit me up in the ask box/comments/inbox!

anyway i'll finally wrap up this chapter's note cause you have the final chapter to read. enjoy my loves

Words: nearly 4k

Warnings: none??? part of their dialogue is inspired by some of my favourite movies and books like her and the wife and almost famous and before sunrise and the fault in our stars and eternal sunshine of the spotless mind and maybe more I DONT KNOW ITS BEEN AN EMOTIONAL RIDE OK I CANT EVEN REMEMBER WHERE DID I PULL THIS FROM EXACTLY. some errors too cause i didnt revise it completely my bad im crying ok

 ACT 3 - DAWN

"It's the moment night time seems weaker and everything seems easier to figure out"

 Chapter 21

Roger lit a cigarette in the train cabin, and tried to open the top window, the one you can usually pull open.

"Rog, it's not gonna open, you know", you told him as you watched him fiddling with the glass.

"I guess you're right. Hope you won't be bothered by the smoke", he said, taking a puff.

"I won't if you share it with me", you answered, and with a half smile on his lips, Roger lifted the cigarette to your lips, and you breathed in the smoke while looking at him through your lashes.

"Don't look at me like that. Especially if the cigarette smoke is going to leave the cabin sultry and hot", he told you, and you laughed.

"Yeah, and we won't do anything about it", you said, trying to make yourself more comfortable in your seat.

"And why is that?", he asked, batting his lashes innocently at you, you you lightly elbowed his ribs.

"We need to do something else, something we've been ignoring the whole trip", you said, and he raised his brow. "We need to talk about us", you told him, and he breathed out, smoke coming out of his nose.

"I guess you're right again", he said, then slid a bit down on his seat.

You didn't think much about talking about your future with Roger while in Paris, so now has to be the time, on a train that will take you to London and to a whole month of Roger being away, promoting News Of The World.

While in Paris, you never talked to Roger about the future, and talks of the past where subtle - you talked about how you felt with the development Doctor Who took over the years, but didn't think much about the fact that you were separate during years of the show.

You enjoyed the city, but most of all, you enjoyed each other's presence, not only going to museums, churches and castles around you, following them up with fancy dinners and walks along the Seine, but you also spent time inside the room, in your pajamas, ordering take out from restaurants you found on the phone book, having a hard time trying to speak french as Roger tickled the sole of your feet and kept trying to distract you.

You would always remember the peace you felt as you ate cheap chinese food on Roger's shirt on the balcony at night, the Eiffel Tower shining over your meal and Roger's electric blue eyes as he hummed early David Bowie's songs under his breath, or how at home you felt sitting on the couch, Roger on the floor with his head on your lap, his soft strands on your fingers as you tried to braid them while watching re-runs of I Dream of Jenie, Roger focused, trying to understand the french dubbing until he noticed what you were doing.

"Babe, are you trying to braid my hair? Think I'd look better if I'd look more girly?", he said, moving his head back so he can look at you.

"Yeah. Always thought so, but I'll have to keep imagining, since your hair is too short to braid", you pouted, and he laughed.

"Don't you like my new hair, then?", he asked, pouting back, and you moved your head to his level so you could press a quick kiss to his lips.

"I love it, Rog. Especially cause since it's shorter, it looks even messier after I pull it", you said, and he smirked. "My favourite look of yours is when you're all dishevelled after sex", you winked, teasing him.

"That's my favourite, too", he said, turning completely around and pulling you in for a kiss, his hand on the back of your neck.

But now, while in the smoke filled train cabin, you needed to make a few things clear.

"I've been avoiding this for a reason", he said, looking out the window, and you raised your brow, waiting for him to explain. "I have this weird, innate fear of you telling me it's all good but you don't want to see me again, or something", he said, and you gave him a half smile.

"I don't want to do this, Rog. And I won't do it", you told him, and he sighed in relief.

"Even though loving you is a bit complicated, I'll admit. Especially if you're me", you shrugged, and he turned to you, confused.

"Let me explain. I loved your idea for a bed of roses, a few days ago, cause it can exemplify our relationship so well. The roses feel so good against the skin, the smell is so intoxicating, it looks so beautiful - maybe too beautiful, ethereal, even. But then there's always a few thorns here and there, and they hurt so much when they lodge themselves on my skin, but I'm so intoxicated by the whole experience that I don't mind - I convince myself that it's nothing, and even that it's already part of me already, cause the thorns fit so perfectly on me, on my little stabs made by myself, by my own insecurities", you say, and he stares at you.

"What I'm trying to say is that every minute that I'm with you always distract me from the issues that come with being with you - the fact that there's a few expectations that come with being your serious girlfriend, be them always travelling with you while we're young, or eventually staying home once we have kids, knowing that you'll eventually cheat on me with a younger version of myself, while I'm too tired of taking care of the babies to even think about my sexual needs", you said, and you watched him frown.

"I'm not sure where you're going with this-", he started saying, but you cut him off.

"Let me finish, I promise it will get better", you said, fixing your posture as you start again. "But the thing is, I love you. I always have, ever since I started talking to you, you always trying to outflirt me, always seeing me as your equal. You desire me, but you also listen and see me as another human being, you never back down or ignore me if I challenge one of your beliefs, and you never treat me as a trophy-wife-to-be", you say, and you can feel your eyes fill with tears, but you're smiling. That's what you always loved about Roger. He smiled back at you.

"And because I love you, I don't want to deny myself the pleasure of being with you. I'd rather be in a bed of roses than in an empty bed - or worse, a blank bed, someone being there just so it's less cold at night. I want to be with you, Rog", you say, and he pulls you in for a hug, and you hold him back for a few moments before pulling away and looking at him in the eye.

"But also because I love you and I want to be with you, Rog, I don't want us to try to fit into this type of relationship I just mentioned. I don't want you to make me the other woman, either, when you eventually find someone so you can settle down, if it's not me" you said, rubbing your nose. "I guess I want to settle down with you, eventually, as we planned before, but this whole thing - living together and cheating if we're away for too long - it kills me, and I think it kills you, too. I respect you too much to want to cheat on you again, cause if I ever do and you never find out, I'll lose respect for you, and the same thing will happen if you cheat on me and I don't find out. And these are ugly truths, but this isn't our first time together; we know each other, we need to think about this", you told him, and he nodded.

"And I need to make it clear that I'll never be a simple rockstar housewife - I'll never be able to quit my job and look out for the kids while you travel the world and I make them lunch. I'll never be able to sit down on a dinner table on some award show with you and when someone asks me what I'll do, I'll smile as I say I'm a king-maker. I'm not", you said, firmly.

"And I'll never be satisfied with dumb spa and shopping trips as you do the actual work when we travel. If I have to live this life, I'll resent you, and I don't want that. I like being domestic with you, but this type of forced domesticity will poison us again - we're both too wild, too career-focused, for this. We've always been similar", you said, and he gave you a smile as you sighed. "I guess that's all I have to say", you shrugged, and he laughed. "Not much, right?", he said, running his fingers on his hair, pulling the strands back.

"Guess it's my turn now", he said, and you nodded, encouraging him. "When I saw you again, at the pub, there was so much that I wanted to say. I mostly wanted to apologize - it got lost as I got infatuated with you again, and tried to get you in bed - you know, usual stuff", he winked, and you laughed.

"But yeah, I kept looking at you while you updated me on your life, your skin glooming under the stars and the moonlight, and I couldn't stop thinking about all the things I wanted to apologize to you for. All the pain we caused each other. Everything I put on you. Everything I needed you to be or needed you to say. Cause no matter what - even if you had decided on never seeing me again after all this - I'll always love you, because we grew up together. And you helped make me who I am", he said, moving strands of your hair behind your ear.

"I just want you to know that there will always be a piece of you in me, always. Whatever someone you become, wherever you are in the world, however this" he said, pointing his finger to the two of us "works out, in whatever form it might take", he said, sighing "I'll always send you love. Before being anything else to me - and I hope to God you're always something more - you'll always be my friend, to the end", he told you, and the tears were already streaming down your cheeks. His cheeks soon mirrored yours.

"And now, after you so eloquently told me all your fears about our future, I need you to know something else, too", he said, as you wiped the tears under your eyes. "I always loved you for being the way you are. You always challenge me, you always make me work harder, try harder, to be better. And it's not even something you force me to do; I just follow your lead. The way you look was what first got into me, I won't lie, but the way you are is what made me stay. It's what will always make me stay", he said, a genuine smile on his lips. He made you feel warm, like the sun.

"You're the smartest person I know, you're funny, you enjoy sex, you're unapologetic, you're proud of who you are, even proud of your insecurities. And you have such a huge importance in my life: you made me who I am. Whatever way you want to make us work, I trust you. I just want to be with you, in whatever form it takes", he said, smiling, and then getting up and opening his bag.

"I forgot to give you something", he said, pulling a string out of the front pocket. You recognized the red glimmer. It was the heart necklace. "It's still yours to keep. Even though it's not in its original glory, it will always be yours. The necklace and my heart", he said, and you couldn't help but smile at him.

"Always so cheesy, Taylor", you said, joking as you moved your hair to the side so he could put the necklace on.

"You always loved it", he winked, and you laughed. "I do", you said, smiling.

"So, what does it all mean? Where are we?", you asked, and he shrugged. "Wherever you want us to be. I just hope that you keep me around", he told you sincerely.

"I will. So, we're not going back to our old ways, right? We're not back at sharing a flat and stuff", you said, and he nodded. "Sure".

"And you're going to spend a month away, all around the world. I don't want you to feel pressured not to cheat", you said, and he nodded again.

"Yeah, and you're back in London, starting a new job. I don't want you to be worried, too", he said.

"So, maybe no exclusivity, this time? At least not now. This is still debatable, in the future", you said, and he agreed.

"Makes sense. But I'll have a hard time desiring anyone but you", Roger said in a low voice, and you laughed to break any mood that might have settled. You needed to get things clear before making out in the train cabin.

"Me too, Rog. But I don't want to create any expectations of loyalty because we know each other too well, and I don't want a stupid fight to break this thing we're building together", you said.

"It's a good idea. So, no titles, too? I can't call you my girlfriend?", he said, and you laughed.

"You can, if you want to", you told him, and he pulled you closer to him.

"Good, cause I want to call you that on the News of the World launch party, that I'm hoping you'll go as my date", he said, pressing a kiss on top of your head, breathing in your fruity smell.

"Of course I'll go. I need to see the boys again", you told him, and he laughed.

"So you're not going for me, then?", he pouted, and you laughed again.

"No, I'm just going so I can meet Deacy's kid", you told him, and it was his turn to laugh.

-

Once you got to London, Roger offered to go to the airport alone - he had to get on his flight, and he was late. He knew you had to go home and get ready for work tomorrow, but you wanted to spend as much time with him as possible.

He looked relieved when you got on a cab with him to Heathrow.

"Big day tomorrow, huh", he said, rubbing your arm.

"Yeah, I still can't believe I'm finally going to work at the British Museum. It's so surreal, it feels like a dream. Like I'm living someone else's life", you said, looking out at the window, the early sunday morning reminding you of fresh starts - you were in the middle of one.

"Well, it's your life, and it's your job, cause you deserve it, babe. I never met someone who worked so hard to get where they want", Roger said, smiling, proud.

"I did. You and the boys", you said, and he huffed. "Guess you're right. Me and that pack of idiots, we turned out okay", he joked.

Once you got to the airport, you followed him to his gate.

You were feeling nervous - you had him for a week, and now it's time to say goodbye again.

You're both aware that the rest of the band is already waiting impatiently in the jet, but you can't help it - you hug him, dropping your luggage on the floor, and he does the same, the hug soon turning into a kiss as you rub your hands on each other's body, as if you're trying to remember how every inch of the other feels like, as if you're both about to disappear.

But the airport worker clears her throat, and you break the kiss, looking at each other longingly.

"Don't say goodbye", you beg Roger, putting your hand on his lips as he opens his mouth.

"See you soon", he says between your fingers. You smile at him, grateful he found a way with words so you're not repeating the same old goodbyes.

"See you soon, Roger", you say, hugging him again for a few seconds, just trying to capture every detail - his smell, the feeling of his arms around you, his body against yours.

And once he has to go into the jet, you go to the glass wall, and you can swear you see some familiar faces from the windows of the jet.

But before you can focus, soon Roger's well known face takes over the window you're watching, and he puts a hand on the glass.

You can't help but think about the last time you did that with him, him being on your place as you were inside the plane, moving to another country, your heart weighing down on you, filled with doubts.

But now your heart warmed you up, filled with joy and love, and you could feel Roger's crystal heart on top of your chest. He was right. There would be always a piece of him on you, too.

-

Epilogue: News of the World Launch Party

"Y/N! You're back!" Brian's voice welcomed you to the ballroom.

You squeezed Roger's hand - it was the first time you saw the band in years, and you couldn't help but feel a bit nervous about it.

"Darling, you're really back! We thought Roger was getting high too often and hallucinated a week in Paris with you. But I guess you did come back to him", Freddie said, hugging you by the side as he held a glass of champagne on his other hand.

"I'm back with him only so I can see you all again, of course", you said, winking at Roger as he pretended to be offended.

But then you heard Deacy and Veronica scream your name in unison, and you turned to see them.

"So you're really back!!" Deacy said, but your eyes were on the baby boy on his lap.

"This is the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life.", you said, trying to get his attention. Roger looked at you, adoringly, as you moved your eyes to Veronica.

"Ronnie!! You're so big!" you said, trying to hug her through her belly. "It's coming out in a few months! It's a boy, Michael. Someone our young Rob can play with", she said, and Roger frowned.

"I could swear it was a girl", he said, and John smiled. "Maybe next time", he said.

"Hey, Bob. Do you want to play with me? C'mon", you said, and he motioned to go to your arms. You picked him up as he started playing with your hair.

"You'd be a good mom, Y/N", Veronica said, and you got tense. "God, Ronnie, don't even joke about this", you said, and Roger chuckled. "It's a sensitive topic at the moment", he explained.

"The moment will take quite some time, you know", you told him, the youngest Deacon pulling your earring before playing with the crystal heart on your neck.

You talked to the boys and Veronica for a while, updating each other, but no one brought up how you and Roger got back together. It just felt natural - no need to question.

You stayed with Roger for the whole night - behind the cameras as he did press, by his side during dinner - where he was back at his old ways, teasing you lightly with his hand under the table. You felt good in his arms, getting back into his life.

He was interested in getting back into your life, too. He came back to London last night, and went straight to dinner with you. You were trying different food, and now was time to try Indian food.

As he ate his Chicken Tikka Masala, dipping the naan in the sauce, you invited him for a party your bosses would be throwing next month to celebrate a new exhibit.

He gave you a bright smile. "I'd love to be your date, my love", he said.

And after the Deacons went home - Robert was asleep on his father's lap - the party got louder, the dance floor more full. You could swear you saw an angular face that could only belong to Bowie pick someone to dance - was this Princess Leia? - but before you could process the whole situation, Roger pulled you to dance.

"Thought you didn't dance, Mr Taylor", you told him, wrapping your arms around his neck as you tried to slow dance to All The Young Dudes, by Mott The Hoople.

"I don't dance very well, indeed. But it's just an excuse to be so close to you in public, and God, I'm dying to call you Ms Taylor", he said, and you chuckled.

"Take it slower, Rog", you told him, and he leaned in to rest his head on the curve of your neck. "And why do you want to be close to me in public? Is it still one of your weird fetishes?", you joked, and you felt him laugh against your skin.

"No, it's just that you've been killing me with this dress of yours, and you've been killing a lot of the guys here, too. Could swear I saw Bowie checking you out", he told you, and you gasped.

"Taylor, don't even joke about this. I'd have a heart attack", you said, and he laughed. "You'd leave me here for Bowie, is that it?", he asked, and you laughed.

"Of course not. I just have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that he might acknowledge my existence", you said, and it was his turn to laugh. "The only eyes I really like to feel on me when I look away are yours, Rog", you said, and he gave you a quick kiss.

"Okay, had enough of trying to dance. Let's get some fresh air", he told you, and you followed him to the balcony.

As the cold, fresh air brushed against your exposed skin, you heard the first notes to Tiny Dancer, by Elton John. You walked to the balcony, leaning in and taking in the view of London at night.

Roger soon took you into his arms, hugging you from behind, and you felt safe, his body heart making you warm in the cold evening as he jokingly whispered "Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man" into your ear, and you scoffed. "Slower, Taylor", you told him, and he laughed.

"However you want it, babe", he said, now paying attention to the view, focusing on the feeling on you in his arms again. Finally.

 But oh how it feels so real

Lying here with no one near

Only you and you can hear me

When I say softly, slowly

 "I could die right now, Y/N. I'm just... happy. I've never felt this type of happiness before. I'm just exactly where I want to be", Roger said in his husky voice, and you nodded lightly in agreement.

Because in Roger's arms, you feel home. You feel what you hoped to feel for years - what got you to move to London in the first place. You feel like you belong.

---

1988 Special

Taglist:

@taylorroger-s @sarai-ibn-la-ahad @its-nessi @anamcg317 @frenchieswiftie @queen-danielle-dani-dan @minihemo @shutup-sorry @theyrealllegends @killerqueenisthebest @ashagracelove @hardy-s @fuckinghurricanesoul @secretsweetscollectionblog @mrswinterhater @11mb0 @tamtam-go92 @derptatosaur @brianandthemays @phantom-fangirl-stuff @the-hysterical-queen @rogerofmylife @notevenlxvely @discodeakyy @x1975sos @16wiishes @jennycidesstuff @partydulce @melros-e @onevisionliz

#roger taylor x reader #roger taylor #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy #roger taylor smut #roger taylor x you #roger taylor fanfic #roger taylor fluff #ben hardy x you #ben hardy smut #ben hardy fluff #ben hardy fanfic #queen fanfic #bohemian rhapsody fanfic #borhap fanfic #bedofroses #roger taylor imagine #ben hardy imagine #queen imagines #bohemian rhapsody imagine

[smugdensugdendingle]

“ I’d kill for a coffee.... literally. “ Aaron to Robert.

Hey Lovely! I hope you like it!

Day Two: A Football Team

Aaron could Kill Robert. No, it was definitely going to happen, a couple hours he was told, a quick trip into town for a meeting and he’d be back in no time to help with the kids. That was five hours ago and still no Robert to be seen. So, there Aaron was stood in the portacabin holding their fussy 13-month-old daughter on his hip, their four-year-old sat at the other desk on the iPad, headphones on, sucking her thumb watching a show, and their six-year-old pouting at Robert’s desk.

“Dad!”

“Seb, I swear if you keep shouting…” Aaron told the boy as he went through the pile of papers on his desk looking for a file.

“I’m bored, though!”

“So I’ve heard and like I said we’re not going anywhere ’til Dad gets here,” Aaron replied making his way over to sit down, he placed the little girl on his lap.

“Why couldn’t we just stayed home?” The little boy whined.

“Because Ellis called out sick and I couldn’t just let this place stay shut all day,” he told the little boy looking over at him.

“Dad said you used to keep it closed when I was a baby,” the boy explained.

“Your dad needs to keep his mouth shut,” he muttered to himself.

“What?”

“Seb, while yes this place was closed quite a lot back then it was different, we didn’t have as many clients as we do now and we had you to mind we couldn’t exactly just plop you in front of the telly and go about our business,” he explained.

“It’s not fair,” Seb pouted. Aaron sighed, “Why don’t you go watch the iPad with Sofia?” He suggested causing Seb to frown.

“What?”

“Can I go outside and play?”

“You’re joking right?” Aaron questioned. “It’s a scrapyard, not a playground.”

“I’ll stay by the door,” the boy protested.

“No,” he firmly replied. “Now you have two options you one, go watch what Sof is watching or you can just sit there and be bored your choice.”

“Fine,” Seb stated getting up, making his way over to his sister. Aaron breathed out, he looked down to see his other daughter slapping away on his laptop with a big smile painted across her face, “You helping Daddy work Ev?” He asked looking at the jumble of letters that were displayed on the screen. The little girl giggled in response, “Thank you,” he replied leaning down to kiss the top of her head.

It was rounding three in the afternoon, after what felt like a million calls and a million and a half texts to Robert with no word back Aaron had just given up on reaching him. Seb was now playing out front throwing a tennis ball against the portacabin, Sofia playing a game on his phone, and he was pacing the small office with a crying Evelyn trying to calm her. To say he was exhausted would be a major understatement, the thumping of the ball was giving him a headache but it was better than the arguing that had to happen after the iPad had died. The landline started ringing, Evelyn was still crying, “Sweetheart, Daddy needs to answer the phone can we quiet down?” he asked the 13-month-old causing the little girl to cry even louder. “I’ll take that as a no,” he said to himself as the phone continued ringing, “I know, I know, shh, it’s okay,” he continued as he softly patted the little girl on the back as he paced, after a couple of more rings the phone went silent. Aaron sighed, “How is Daddy met to get anything done little one?” He asked the crying girl.  “Here,” Aaron said pulling his keys from his pocket. The little girl took the keys, her cries quickly turned to laughter as she jiggled them, the clanking metal ring in his ears, the phone started ringing again he leapt for the phone answering it, “Yeah, Holey Scrap this is Aaron speaking,” he said trying to talk over the noise, he reached for the keys in Evlyn’s hand with his free hand. “No, sorry mate we’re not doing pickups today,“ he replied fighting to keep a grip on his daughter’s hand with the keys. The girl started fussing as she tried to pull free.

”Stop it,” he told his daughter in almost a whisper. “No, sorry not you,” he said into the phone. “Was talking to my daughter,” he explained.  “Yeah, trying is the keyword,” He replied. He frowned quickly realizing the thumping of the ball against the portacabin had stopped, “I’m sorry,” he replied realizing he hadn’t heard anything the man on the phone had said. He made his way over to the window to look out not seeing his son by the door, “You know what, could you give me a second?” he asked the man as he held up the phone to his ear with his shoulder. He made his way to the door, opening it, it took a couple of seconds to register what he was looking at, “SEB!” He yelled at the sight of the six-year-old stood on top of an old junked car.

“Hi, Dad!” The boy called back with a huge smile. “I got up all by myself!” He explained proudly.

“I’m gonna have to call you back,” he said into the phone letting the phone drop from his shoulder into his hand ending the call without another word. “Get down now,” he told the boy as he made his way out the portacabin and rushed over, Evelyn holding on tightly.

“But I just got up here,” Seb replied.

“And now you’re getting down,” he answered holding his hand out for the boy to grab a hold of.

“But,” the boy tried protesting.

“No ‘but’, get down,” Aaron repeated. The boy made his way over a couple of steps jumping into his dad’s free arm slightly knocking the wind out of him. Aaron kneeled letting Seb down, “Inside, come on.”

“I want to play with the ball again,” Seb said.

Aaron chuckled, “Nope, inside now,” he repeated ushering the boy towards the portacabin.

“Daddy your phone died,” Sophia said as they made their way in, handing the now useless piece of tech back.

“Thank you, Sof,” he replied with a sigh taking his phone back and placing it on his desk. He froze, again, noticing the silence, “Please tell me Ev is still holding my keys,” he said to the two older kids. Sofia and Seb shook their heads no, “Ev, where are Daddy’s keys?’ He asked turning his attention to the girl.

“By-by,” she only said with a smile.

“Bye Bye?” Aaron questioned getting only a smile and a giggle out of Evelyn. “Did you throw Daddy’s keys?”

“By-by,” the little girl repeated.

“Who wants to play a game?” He asked the two older kids.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Twenty minutes had past and Aaron still couldn’t find his keys, Evelyn was now sat in her stroller by the portacabin with Sofia sat next to her on the steps as Seb and Aaron searched the area near the car that Seb had climbed on.

“Damn it!” Aaron vented out as he was on his hands and knees blindly feeling around underneath the clunker.

“Oooh you said a bad word,” he heard Sofia call back.

“Yes, Sofia I know,” Aaron answered.

“Daddy!” He heard Sofia yell he looked back to see the four-year-old launching of the steps. Closely followed by “There they are,” He popped up peering over the car to see Robert pick up Sofia.

“Hi,” he responded making it to his feet.

Robert laughed, “Any particular reason you were on the ground?” He asked.

“Ev decided it be fun to throw my keys,” Aaron explained.

“Dada dada,” Evelyn called out at the sight of Robert.

“Hi Miss Evelyn,” he replied making his way over to the stroller. “Have you been driving Daddy Aaron mad?” He asked leaning down.

“Dad, can we go home now?” Seb asked Robert. Robert smirked, “What your bored of this place already?” He asked. “I figured you’d be trying to climb onto anything and everything.”

“He already has,” Aaron answered still scanning the ground. “Climb on top of that car over there, all by himself,” he added pointing to the car.

“Dad yelled at him,” Sofia told Robert.

“I didn’t yell at him, I merely told him to get down… very loudly,” he explained.

“Sounds like an eventful day,” Robert said with a laugh.

“Which you were supposed to be a part of,” Aaron pointed out. “Couple of hours you said.”

“Yeah, sorry,” Robert replied. “got roped into two more meetings by Nicola,” he explained.

“Dad!” Seb interrupted yanking on Robert’s jacket. “Please?!”

“We have to find Dad’s keys first,” Robert told the boy.

“I put Daddy’s keys on his desk,” Sophia told her dads pointing inside. Both Robert and Aaron looked at the girl, “What?” Aaron questioned.

“I founded them by the steps,” she added.

Robert choked back a laugh.

“I swear if you laugh…” Aaron trailed off.

“I’m sorry,” Robert replied still trying his best to bite back the laugh.

Aaron breathed out slowly before chuckling himself, “Oh my- why don’t we just go home,” he replied making his way up the steps and into the office to retrieve his keys, his phone, and the diaper bag.

He stepped out shutting the door and locking it behind him.

“Long day?” Robert asked knowing the answer as Aaron made his way down.

“Very.”

“What can I do to make it up to you?” Robert asked wrapping his free arm around Aaron’s waist running small circles on his back with his finger. The other man thought for a moment, “I’d kill for a coffee,” Aaron replied.

“It’s nearly four in the afternoon, you won’t sleep tonight-“ Robert began saying before being cut off.

“You don’t understand, I will LITERALLY kill someone if I don’t get some caffeine in me now,” Aaron replied with a serious face.

“Looks like we’re stopping by the Café before home,” Robert told the kids.

“Thank you.”

“What are you gonna be like when we have the next kid?” Robert asked.

“When?” Aaron questioned. Robert smirk before leaning in to kiss his husband, “A football team remember?” He replied with a grin leaning back for another kiss only to be stopped.

“Coffee first,” Aaron stated pulling out of Robert’s grip making his way over to the stroller.

ao3 link

previous fic

#28 fics in february #Anonymous #day two #aaron dingle #robert sugden #seb white #original sugden-dingle kids #robert x aaron #aaron x robert #robron #robron fanfiction #ao3 robron

[thesexymnm]

#1 - the last summer

hi guys! im excited to finally share some of my writing on my tumblr. this one i wrote back in february of this year and it’s a personal one. i hope you enjoy it, and of course, if you have any suggestions of things i could work on, im open to anything. im 15 and ive been creative writing for years and years, but im still young so anywhere i could improve id like to work on. alright, here is The Last Summer.

A sunny Saturday in June and the birds were still singing their song as I drove south down the rocky path to Nana and Pa’s house. In the car with me, my mother and father. Mom was filled with hope and love, she was hoping that the treatments would work, and that the cancer would vanish, but the past few months would say different. There were five clouds painted on the otherwise blue horizon behind my grandparents house as we pulled our pearly white Volkswagen into the long, winding driveway.

Pulling open the front door made a creek noise, which was a signal for my grandparents to shout, “Hey!”, and they did, just like every time. A rush of cold air hit my face walking into their house, and it smelled of May’s early dandelions. I was greeted by the usual five kisses from Nana, and a bear hug from Pa. Only this time, he was bald, and to give me that warm hug that was so distinct I could never forget it even if I tried, he had to let go of his walker. It looked like the one the old man uses from the Disney movie, “Up”, and it was so unusual, it upset me. I never pictured him as an old man, although he was my grandpa.

Back in his youth, my grandpa was good with his hands, building sheds, houses, and other smaller things. He used to climb trees,go swimming, things young people do. However, these activities weren’t something he stopped doing back twenty years ago. He was doing that type of stuff up until the diagnosis, a few months previous. When he was hospitalized, I knew that things were never going to be the same. He’d tell me,

“Kate, you just have to be tough sometimes.”

He was released in early June, but it didn’t mean he was getting any better.

July was different. Mom had her birthday that month. He was there, but not in good shape. He almost reminded me of a narcoleptic. He was just so weak, and he wasn’t hiding it, if he was stronger I’m sure he would’ve but the state he was in made it impossible for him to disregard the pain he was enduring. “Mom, should I wake up Pa? We are gonna blow out the candles soon, Dad has the cake ready.” I asked her. But she replied with, “No, Kate. Just let him rest. We will do it without him.” I know deep down she wanted to wake him up for that minute and have him stand by her side as we sang the song. But she was his daughter, and she wanted him to rest and get better.  And so Mom blew out the candles on her fortieth birthday without her father by her side. I was naive back then, I didn’t really understand what happens when someone dies. Up until those months I had never experienced death. It’s scary, sad, but most of all, it’s painful. Nana and Pa left the party early to drive back to their house, so he could get more rest.

The next week, Mom drove me to their house so I could stay the weekend there. I never minded staying at my grandparents house. It was beautiful, large and cozy. I got there and put my bags in the sunflower themed guest room upstairs, the green walls reminded me of summers when the window was open, with the cool breeze rushing into the room that smelt of the sea. “Kate, come down here for a minute!” I heard Nana shout. I rushed downstairs to find her in the kitchen, stirring a bowl of who-knows-what. She said, “Go help Pa in the garage, I’m sure he would enjoy your help and company.” She shot me a little smile as I nodded yes. I opened the door to the garage and there he was, in a wheelchair, working on this old 1940’s Chevy truck. The body of the truck was all rusty blue, but painting it was forever out of the question for him, he liked the look of the original paint from almost eighty years ago. He heard me open the door, and he spun around his chair so he could see me.

“Hey Kate! What do you need?” He said when he saw my face.

I replied with, “Nothing, I was just wondering if you needed any help.”

He smiled and accepted my assistance. He showed me what he was working on, and that when he is in the chair, he can’t get inside the truck to test the engine. So, that was my job, turning the key every so often and fetching him tools that were up on shelves he couldn’t reach. It made me happy that I got to spend some time with him. Unfortunately, it was the last time I spent with him like that. I never ruined the memory, tainting it with the ugly stigma of the last real bonding moment between him and I. I just had to stay positive through all of it, and remember the good times rather than the bad.

August was the last time I saw him. My grandpa was a summer type of guy. When my grandparents retired from their jobs, they built their dream home on this quiet street with a creek at the end for their boat. I remember it like she never moved away after he was gone, like I still went there every summer for a few weeks, like I still rode in the boat and got splashed by the salty water that was always so cold, but felt so nice on your face on a hot August afternoon. Those things were part of my childhood, and I would never forget them.

Mom and I opened the front door to my grandparents house in the middle of August. We were greeted with a, “Hey!” from Nana, but not from Pa. It was noon on a breezy Sunday when he shuffled out of his bedroom. He looked oddly frail since I saw him last on that weekend in July. He was paler, skinnier, and visibly worse in his condition. Nana helped him sit down at the table with all of us so we could enjoy the doughnuts Mom and I had brought over from his favorite bakery. He was just acting strange, like something wasn’t right. He was talking about random things, and couldn’t focus on the conversation. It was off for sure, and after our doughnuts, Mom and I decided to leave the house. We got in the car, and drove back down the long driveway, as Nana and Pa waved down from the porch. I rolled down my window and yelled, “I love you!”, and Pa grinned showing his teeth and yelled it back. That August day was the last time I saw him.

September brought tears to our family. I didn’t cry when I heard the news, just stared at my father who broke the news to me, wondering how this could’ve happened. There is no bright side to death, its tragic mostly always. I just remembered to be strong, and not remember that summer as a bad one, because it was his last one. Rather remember it as a good one, filled with memories. Just like any other summer that I’ve had at their house. If there was a time in the six months after his passing when I was feeling particularly sad about him no longer being with me, I had to remember,

“Kate, you just have to be tough sometimes.”

Once I thought about that, I was always able to keep my cool and hold back my tears. Summer was his favorite season, and as it came to a close, there he was, doing the same.

The memories brought me back to days in June with blue skies and hummingbirds. The memories brought me back to July, filled with birthday cake and elbow grease. These memories brought me back to August, with doughnuts and the last “I love you”, but that was just the last one said. There was so many more thought in my head and I’m sure there was some in his too, even if it wasn’t as sharp as it used to be. These memories I have all bring me back to September when I saw my first dead body laying in a room, on a bed with a roof. But the good times reign over the bad in so many ways. The memories I chose to remember and travel back to in the fake world of happiness in everyone's mind said that I needed to be tough. And so, I was.

#writing #writers #my writing #writing community #creative writing #short story #writers on tumblr

[girlwhocried5sauce]

headcanon for being on your period and dating sweetpea

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

fyi: I listened to Him & I x G-eazy ft. Halsey while writing this.

(((credit to the *unknown owner of this gif*)))

warnings: references to sexy times, some swearing, and pretty pg-13 type of stuff

🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍🐍

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.

.

-you weren’t due for that time of the month for a few more days so you weren’t exactly prepared for the aftermath or bleeding through your pants

-plus it hadn't happened within the seven months that you and sweetpea had been dating

-you and sweets making out in his trailer on his couch for like a good twenty minutes

-being on top of him with his hands wrapped tightly around your waist and your hands on his face

-let’s just say the boy is vocal

-both of you whimpering and panting im crying

-you getting up to get a condom (because safety first kids)

-“babe don’t panic but you’re bleeding. like through your pants.” he said

-sweetpea was shooketh

-and after a few moments of your own embarrassment, you realized your light denim jeans were permanently ruined

-“damn it, these are my favorite jeans” you sighed

-“forget your pants y/n, ill buy you more! you are bLEEDING”

-“sweets im fine relax”

-“I dont know what to do should I call your parents?”

-“fUCK I did this to you didnt I?”

-“breathe baby breathe. its just aunt flo”

-“you mean???”

-“its my period sweets”

-“OHHH”

-“so you mean this has never happened to toni or any other person with a uterus that you know?”

-“no. at least I don’t think so?? I mean she has asked for my jacket a couple times but I just thought she was cold so I didn’t ask questions ”

-changing into a pair of his gym shorts

-explaining to him how periods work bc the boy hardly pays attention in school

-“thanks for not making me feel stupid about not knowing all this stuff”

-ruffling sweets hair and making him smile cause hell, this boy can be really soft sometimes

-but only with you of course

-and toni occasionally

-you only had one spare pad/tampon in your purse so you had him go to the local 24-hour supermarket to pick up some more and a couple other things

-he refused to take your money before he left bc “it cant be that expensive right?”

-you tried to tell him it definitely can be that expensive 

-he still refused to let you pay

-being on facetime with him the whole time to make sure he got the right stuff

-”so is your flow heavy or light? wings or no? what the fuck is a diva cup and why does it look like a bell?”

-him almost getting into a full-blown fight with the cashier guy who side eyed him

-”the hell are you looking at me like that for? mind your business..or do you want me to mind it for you” he said charging at him like he always does lmaoo

-”I can ring you up over here if you want” an older lady cashier said from the next lane

-”just go to her line babe, she seems nicer,” you said, still on facetime

-”I think its very sweet what you’re doing.” she told him which made him a little less mad at what happened moments before, with the other cashier

-”your total is $17.59.”

-”the fuck is the shit so expensive for?” LOL

-when you got back to his trailer he was still shook bc of the price lmaoo

-he is the absolute definition of ((((a bad boy whose only good for you))))

-the next few days were very interesting

-“what are you hungry for today princess?”

-“anything greasy or sweet”

-so he got you both

-from pops obviously

-“and I got you this gift card to that makeup store you like”

-“sweets where’d you get the money for this???”

-“mowed a couple lawns, helped fix a couple bikes. no drug money was spent I promise”

-cause he knows how you feel about dealing drugs

-smiling @ how cute he is bc HELLO

-“you didn’t have to do all this babe. I would’ve been fine with just spending time with you which made him blush im screaming

-of course, guys (both ghoulies and serpents) would give him shit for being “whipped”

-“okay but I’m getting laid on the regular…what exactly are you all doing besides riding my dick??”

-him definitely getting into a fight that night

-with you playing nurse as soon as he walked through the door with cuts and bruises all over him from head to toe

-him staring at you while you tend to his wounds

-“whats on your mind mayweather?”

-“nothing… I just really do love you y/n…and not just because you save me from all the hospital bills that I would have if it weren’t for you”

-I feel very confident that sweetpea would rub your back or massage your feet if they were swollen

-“the back pain, cramps, mood swings, swollen feet, this all sounds like you’re pregnant babe I looked some stuff up and-”

-“my period coming means I’m not pregnant sweets don’t worry”

-“you sure cause I was a little late pulling out that one night”

-him being a dork and forgetting that you were now on the pill

-“well I wouldn’t be opposed to it. I could definitely see you as a milf”

-after laughing for ten minutes you’d stop and realize something

-“you think about that type of stuff??”

-“I mean yeah sometimes”

-he’s always softer with you than anybody else but he’s especially soft with you during that time of the month

-“toni told me about these PMS brownies from that bakery down the street, and idk how their supposed to help with the pain but she said they really work”

-“this is awesome thank you sweets” you would bring his head down to kiss his nose

-laying down on the couch with him and watching law & order:svu

-“you remind me of detective stabler, pea” you said

-“my temper isnt that bad babe”

-it totally is

-especially if anyone ever got outta pocket with you

-“oh so that one time you broke malachi’s jaw was really necessary?”

-“absolutely baby”

-“ive been called a bitch before sweets and I was kinda acting like one that day”

-“I dont give a fuck, he still shouldnt have said it”

-“I love you sweets”

-”you too princess”

——————————————————

a/n: this was soo much longer than it should’ve been but you already know wtf to do! and that is to leave feedback please xx

sweetpea playlist

sweetpea x reader (woc)

part two

sweetpea first time appearance as a couple

#sweetpea imagine #sweetpea x reader #sweetpea headcanon #riverdale imagines #sweet pea #girlwhocried5sauce #southside serpents #sp-fluff-rec #riverdale #riverdale headcanons #riverdale sweet pea #sweet pea one shot #sweetpea fanfic #sweet pea pod squad #podsquad

[bfknj]

tags masterpost (?)

I was tagged in a few tag games over the past few days and instead of posting them all separately I decided to just put them all on one! If I tagged you feel free to do any or all of these (including people who tagged me!!) As always, don’t feel any pressure to do any, I just think these are fun and wanted to share :)

- - - - 11 questions tag - - - -

Rules: 1. Make sure to post the rules!! 2. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger. 3. Write 11 questions of your own. 4. Tag 11 people

these questions are from @moonmyun !! michaela you had me stRUGGLIN OKAY YOUR QUESTIONS WERE HARD but ily still bless you for the tag you angel :”)

1 who is your bias group? why?

BANGTAN SONYEONDAN AKA MEME SQUAD !!!!!!! honestly they just make me so beyond happy wow holly nobody ever says that about their favs ur original a LOOOT of music is centered around love these days and not to say bts doesn’t do that with a lot of their music but they also tackle a lot of societal issues and I really respect them for that. From 21st century girls w politics, spring day mv and the ferry sinking, suicide in the I need u mv and many other things I feel like they take risks for the sake of portraying what they hold true to their hearts/morals not necessarily what will sell best and I can’t name many other groups who do that as well :( also my boys cute af I love those dweebs IM SO WHIPPED HAH

2 which kpop video do you find the most aesthetically pleasing?

this is hard :(( idk my number one but I really like seventeen hip hop unit’s check in, red velvet’s one of these nights, ladies code’s galaxy, kim lip of loona’s eclipse and crush’s fall ! they don't all match my aesthetic but I feel like they match the songs really well!!! watch them okay 3/5 of them are hELLA UNDERRATED bye

3 if you could instantly learn one choreography, what would you pick?

something by either gfriend or bts?? love whisper or not today or blood sweat tears?? OOOH or red flavor by rv!! tbh though I’m really skinny so my limbs look weird af with a lot of dances rip

4 who do you look up to as a role model (in the kpop community or not)?

there’s no person in particular that really sticks out but I will say I’ve always admired jungkook, and really all trainees for that matter, who leave their families to start training really young because its a process thats hard physically, emotionally and mentally for late teen/early twenties trainees but there’s sO many kids who enter in their pre-teens and idk how they survive also I realized this doesn’t answer your question at all I'm sorry its 1:28 AM I’m just waiting for the DNA mv to drop

5 whose concert would you go to if you could and why?

DAY6 DAY6 DAY6 DAY6 !!!!! THEY INVENTED LIVE SHOWS DONT FIGHT ME ON THIS or shoot maybe dean or crush or heize?? I LOVE TOO MANY TALENTED PEOPLE also I would say bts but although there are countless amazing beautiful armys there are def some crazy scary ones that are known to be horrible at concerts so

6 if you could pick one idol to be best friends with, who would it be and why?

OK YALL IVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS A LOT IN MY DAILY LIFE SO S/H TO MICHAELA FOR ASKING ILY either boo seungkwan or ahn heeyeon!! I feel like hani would be so fun to have girl time with bc I feel like we’re really similar in some ways ?? IDK I LOVE HER bUT overall I’d say boo seungkwan because istg we are 100000000% the same person only he has a weenie ok just trust me I am boo and boo is me

7 would you want to be a part of a kpop group if you had the opportunity to be?

I’d absolutely love to be in the entertainment industry and I think the staging, costuming, group dynamics and publicity (variety shows, fan service/interations) in the kpop industry are all really cool but I honestly don't think I have the mental strength to do it lmao idols go through so much and I don’t think I could handle it regardless of how much I enjoy singing/dancing/performing etc.

8 what languages do you speak, and which do you want to learn?

english and some spanish??? I understand a lot because quite a bit of my family speaks it but my conversational skills have gone downhill recently because I haven’t had a lot of opportunities to practice :( with that said, I’d like to be fluent in spanish and - BEFORE YOU COME FOR ME READ IT ALL OK - I’d like to learn korean BECAUSE!!!!! when I was little before I moved I would go to a farmers market by my house and a lot of the older ladies there spoke korean and little holly though it sounded so pretty and I always wanted to chat w them ok THATS WHY I’m not a creepy koreaboo this has been a thing since before I even knew what a kpop was ok bye 

9 what song cheers you up when you’re sad?

fire by bts bc I get hella turnt to that song its a pROBLEM also jackpot by block b, baby/puss in boots by astro, chained up by vixx, not today/bst by bts, knock knock by twice, i think I love you by sonamoo THE LIST GOES ON I HAVE A WHOLE PLAYLIST OK

10 what things do you associate with your bias?

dimples!! pretty hands, closing one eye in selcas, ootds, happiness so cheesy ik sORRY, ryan, studying, awkward dancing, open mouth laughs, second hand embarrassment, sentimental rants

11 what’s your favourite thing to do in your free time?

cry over namjoon tbh I’m one of those people who is constantly listening to music so I’m always doing that and singing along regardless of if its free time or not HAH then I really like reading and catching up on my youtube subscriptions

my questions!

what is your dream job?

favorite book of all time?

what is your current fashion like and what is your dream fashion?

if your best friend was cloned, how would you know which one of the two was your best friend?

what song got you into kpop?

which idol do you think is most similar to you?

favorite kpop lyrics?

if given the opportunity to collaborate with any group/soloist of your choice, who would you choose and why?

what is your favorite physical and character trait of your ult?

which underrated groups/soloists do you believe deserve more recognition? any song recs?

do you read fanfics? if so, what are your favorites?

- - - - song title game - - - -

I was tagged by @kihani, your song choices were 12/10 

rules: spell you your url with kpop songs and tag ten people! (all of these happen to by song recs too so listen nd be happy friends)

mysterious - hello venus

i think i love you? - sonamoo (a fav ok listen pls)

life in color - beenzino

knock - knk 

jelly - hotshot

only u - daze

out of sorts - vixx

night rather than day - exid

she’s a baby - zico

- - - - get to know me tag! - - - -

1ST RULE: Tag 10 people you want to get to know better.

2ND RULE: BOLD the statements that are true. tagged by @sleepysugarmoon, thank you friend!! APPEARANCE: I am 5'7" or taller I wear glasses (or contact lenses) I have at least one tattoo I have at least one piercing I have blonde hair I have brown eyes I have short hair My abs are at least somewhat defined I have or have had braces PERSONALITY: I love meeting new people  People tell me that I’m funny   Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me I enjoy physical challenges I enjoy mental challenges I’m playfully rude with people I know well I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it ABILITY: I can sing well I can play an instrument  I can do over 30 pushups without stopping I’m a fast runner I can draw well I have a good memory I’m good at doing math in my head I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch I know how to throw a proper punch HOBBIES: I enjoy playing sports I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else I have learned a new song in the past week I work out at least once a week I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months I have drawn something in the past month Fandoms are my #1 passion  I do or have done martial arts EXPERIENCES: I have had my first kiss I have had alcohol I have scored the winning goal in a sports game I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting I have been at an overnight event I have been in a taxi I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year I have beaten a video game in one day I have visited another country I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts RELATIONSHIPS: I’m in a relationship I have a crush on a celebrity I have a crush on someone I know I have been in at least 3 relationships I have never been in a relationship I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them I get crushes easily I have had a crush on someone for over a year I have been in a relationship for at least a year I have had feelings for a friend MY LIFE: I have at least one person I consider a “best friend” I live close to my school My parents are still together I have at least one sibling I live in the United States There is snow right now where I live I have hung out with a friend in the past month I have a smartphone I have at least 15 CDs I share my room with someone RANDOM SHIT: I have breakdanced I have had a teacher with the last name that’s hard to pronounce I have dyed my hair I’m listening to one song on repeat right now I have punched someone in the past week I know someone who has gone to jail I have broken a bone I have eaten a waffle today I know what I want to do with my life I speak at least 2 languages I have made a new friend in the past year

tagging some mutuals bc ily and why do you even follow me I'm a wreck tbh OK i tag: @kihani, @21jd, @lapatronakim, @94seulqi, @gayoongi, @springdqy, @medina-kim, @15minss, @je0n, @cottontae, @taebaeul, @booty-baekery, @lalisl, @babekhyun, @voidpjm and anyone else who wants to try any or all of these!! 

#i love tags yayayay #don't feel like you have to do it!! #tags