#its not even like an ed thing Im just not In the mood to eat rn and they think that means Im starving myself on purpose to upset them | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

idealspawn · 10 months

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im so happy. im so happy i barely even come on tumblr anymore... i met up w the guy im seeing. he kissed me when we were sitting on a large swing :D he told me he actually already wanted to kiss me the last time we were together. we also went out to eat. i let him pick what i ordered and got the bar to make me a surprise drink so it would be fun and challenge my ed. they made a cucumber tom collins w reduced sugar(the only instruction i gave them was to not make the drink too sweet bc i dont like sweet things all that much). and!! tom collins is my fav cocktail btw!! :DD. ate a vegan burger and fries. which is also pretty cool bc i avoid bread generally. but i didnt die and it was so good. we walked around a lot and then climbed on top of this climbing pyramid?? at a playground. we lied down and just talked. i was supposed to go back to my sister's place but he asked if i wanted to stay over at his for a while. he sang to me and played his guitar and showed his cool posters and told me the stories behind them. our first KISS KISS like make out kiss was so cute too... he played a song i knew but had weird memories attached to it. i told him im glad im making new ones w it. when the chorus came on he spontaneously kissed me :D we stayed silent w our foreheads touching till the end of the song. now i can associate the song w good memories :D we cuddled and kissed a lot. i ended up accidentally falling asleep and my sister thought sth had happened to me bc my battery had died too. but it was so nice. it was all so innocent and had no implications that it had to go any further than cuddling and kisses. we were all over eachother and tbh i dont think ive ever felt this comfortable w physical touch w anyone else before. he looks at me w such adoration too.. its so sweet. he said he has discovered so much good music from looking at my spotify which is cute.. our shared playlist now shows that the songs only i listened to before are the songs in common to us. thats sweet... he is so gentle and vulnerable and open. and he likes my quirks and doesnt view them as weird. lol i have that neurodivergent rizz. no but truly. so much more happened. i wish i could talk abt everything but im so exhausted i havent slept at all for the past week bc ive been so busy w diff events. saw my ex at this one party btw. she made long awkward eye contact w me but i looked away very fast but i saw from the corner of my eye that she didnt. at the last party the roles were reversed, i couldnt stop staring at her but she broke the eye contact fast. cool to know im over her completely now. anyway, im in such a great mood that i dont think even she can ruin it. she didnt look like she was having a great time and im glad. i had so much fun and i now think she truly did me a favour by leaving me. i have glow-upped so much and she hasnt. :) i feel so loved by everyone. i cant wait to meet up w the guy again next week. we have so many fun things planned. i cant stop thinking about our goodbye kiss. it was so passionate :D and our chemistry is so good. like truly one of the best. i layed my head on his chest and listened to his heart beating. when i wrapped my arm around him i felt how his heart started beating extremely fast. it was so adorable. :) we have so much in common too, its insane. like literally already starting from our childhood.

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little-bit-of-everything-tbh · 1 year

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Fake boyfriend..?

Bakugou Katsuki x reader x Kirishima Ejirou

Read first: announcement

Read next ^^ - here

Tw: cursing, also maybe some spoiler

Things you should know:

1. I will follow my storyline, there may be some spoilers! I will not focus on anime storyline, sure it will be there but I will focus on my storyline mainly.

2. I decided that this will be story, I don't know how long it will be, how much chapters will it have, I'm doing all this spontaneous and I just hope to have a good time writing this, and I hope you have a good time reading it!

3. No hate! If you don't have anything nice to say don't say it. I accept criticism but not hate thank you very much.

4. This is my first time actually posting what I write so please don't be too harsh on me :>

5. Reader is going to be using she/her and will be referred to as female

6. I may or may not change name of this story because I'm still not sure what to call it. If you have any suggestions you can comment or put it in my ask box or whatever it's called I'm still trying to figure out things here.

7. And the most important! Have a good time reading this. If you have any suggestion of how can I update this story/chapter don't be afraid to text me or comment or whatever!

Part 1 - 2 weeks before U.A High

Kirishima is my best friend. We met when we were little and we were practically inseparable, and, if we're being honest, we still are.

Now it's about 2 weeks before end of the middle school, and we're sitting in class talking about what high school we want to access. We were supposed to choose what school will that be like 10 times till now but I still don't know! I'm indecisive so it's hard for me...

I groan to myself and hit my head on the desk but it doesn't go unnoticed from person behind me. That's when i heard it—

"Pssst!" and a little poke to my back.

I slowly turned and I made eye contact with scarlet eyes that belong to my one and only best friend - Ejirou Kirishima.

"What?" I asked not in a mood to talk.

"Have you thought about that thing?" He asked all excited and happy.

"..." I broke eye contact, not answering.

"C'monn what's the worst thing that can happen if you choose it??" He insists.

I was quiet for a few more seconds and then I answered him.

"Fine, I'll enter for that stupid school" I said and rolled my eyes at him, not even a second later grinning from ear to ear.

"YES! You will not regret it y/n! I promise! We will go and be heros together. Man, i can't wait..." he then started mumbling to him overexcited self about how its going to be the best time ever, or something like that.

I just laughed a little and turned around waiting for class to be over.

When the bell finally rang for the end of the class it was lunch time.

"Yess babey! Lets go eattt!" I jumped and hyped up Kirishima to hurry up with getting his things.

"Jeez, y/n, calm down. I'm coming im coming!" He said getting his things in hurry.

"That's what she said!" I laughed out loud and exited the classroom waiting for him outside.

After a few second he exited as well and I 'boo'-ed at him scaring him.

"Jeez! You were dead 5 seconds ago and now you're all overjoyed!"

"I knooww, but now I get to eat, so I'm not grumpy" I laughed.

He just rolled eyes at me and continued to walk.

When we got in cafeteria someone yelled my name. I looked right and left only to find one and only girl who could yell my name in the middle of cafeteria. It was non other then pink alien girl - Mina Ashido.

"Hey Min!" I waved at her like fucking sims - getting my hand all the way up and then waving maniacally.

She came over and we started making small talk until we got our food and sat down at the table.

"So." Mina said shortly and clear.

We looked at her in confusion, then at each other and then again at her.

"So what?" Kirishima said while I was drinking my chocolate milk.

"Are you two together yet??" She asks and get up all excited, expecting for our answer to probably be yes this time.

We just rolled our eyes and i groaned.

"Mina, if you're gonna hang out with us only to try and get us together then we can't be friends bestie" I said half sarcastic half honestly.

She fake sniffed and just answered, "but you have to get together ONCE ALREADY"

"Yeah, but Mina you're trying to get us together almost 3 years now. Please stop for our and yours sake too" Kirishima said and I nodded agreeing.

She huffed, rolled her eyes and just said "Fine"

Later on we just had some small talk while enjoying our food. When lunch was over, there were some boring classes and I almost fell asleep like 3 times, but every time Kirishima poked me with a pencil, and whispered for me to 'stay awake'.

When last class was finally over, Kirishima and I walked out of school talking.

"So tomorrow you're going to train with me" he said

"What? I did not anticipate in that!" I disagreed

"Well, you didn't do any training all this time, and you have about 2 months before the exam. You better start as soon as you can." He reasoned.

And he was right damn it. "Fine. We'll train tomorrow, text me about time and place okay?" I asked and he just nodded.

"Will it be hard training?" I asked, not really wanting to die out there.

"You'll see" he said and just chuckled.

Great. I'm gonna die out there.

#bakugou x fem!reader #x reader #xreader #anime #boku no hero academia #katsuki bakugou #ejirou kirishima #mina ashido #bakugou x reader #kirishima x reader #my hero academia #fake boyfriend..?

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girlwithfish · 5 months

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Body image appearance discussion. tw for eds and dysmorphia and shit. and self harm and also sex tmi shit. idek. im contemplative bear w me

like basically i never was pretty as a kid or growing up. like idk i guess conventionally attractive people or if ur just "objectively" pretty ppl comment on that a lot if ur a girl like family members but i never really was complimented like that. if anything ppl just tore my appearance down in my family unintentionally or intentionally and i was bullied for my features as a kid and ppl commented on my nose a lot soooooooooo. i feel my really low self esteem just falls back into the whole like trauma of feeling like i shouldnt even exist bc of how i was raised and guilt instilled in u and all of the feelings of alienation socially and bc of my appearance and ethnicity and just who i was. i wasnt really pretty as a teenager either and when i was 18 and started actually exploring sexuality more idk i still felt like im not really pretty and its why i like never believe anyone who compliments me and i dont really get complimented on appearance much anyway so. and also the disordered eating borderline anorexia phase i had when i was 12-14 where i would like take ice baths and restrict and write my goal weight it was kind of fucked up ngl like i didnt rly damage myself physically like i didnt lose much weight but ik the mindset was very damaging and i just like did not feel good bc i had no energy bc i was starving myself LMAOOO anyway that definitely still carries w me even now even tho im better w it but still very much struggle w eating but thats more a depression dysfunctional thing i guess. and when i started getting more sexual i guess like i equate sex and love a lot sometimes i even feel like i cant be pretty but at least im somewaht attractive body wise and im good at fucking like is that crazy idk like sexual validation makes me feel loved and i dont feel like i am actually pretty or pleasant looking or nice looking so the most i can have is like my body is ok . and when i was a kid i used to want to cut my vagina lips off lmaoo cuz i iddnt know what outies were lmfao and shit and ive been having intrusive thoughts like that lately just bc im like really depressed and not having any sex and my relationship is not intimate anymore and i havent even masturbated bc ive been too depresse and i also think masturbating as a girl is kinda annoying like i wanna be in BED not like do it in the bathroom bc i have a big ass rabbit vibe that looks like an alien gun. like if u have a dick u can just jack off in the bathroom or something and its quiet yk???? but like w a vibe its ANNOYING. like i need to be completely alone and i live w someone so like thatsh ard. if i had a dick i would jack one off in the bathroom LMAO. im sexually frustrated and shit and feel like if im not sexual at all im just like ugly and something idk. But also not evne in the mood for sex bc im soooooo depressed. and also im very physical in romantic relationships but not w anyone else idk what thats all about. My mentality has always been if theyre being physically affectionate w me theres no way or little chance they can be mad at me. also i really hate porn and od not like watching it i havent really in yrs cuz i just didnt care for it after i started having long term partner sex cuz im crazy like that like i dont evendesire looking at other ppl when im in a relationship. yk. and i kinda disagree w porn just cuz ive seen waht it does to straight men and u hear so many stories. and it makes me uncomfortable to see ppl have sex i realized. i only like seeing myself have sex LMAOO. im like sexual but in a private way. and i have a weird relationship to sex and my body and shit. idek. its cuz im like ed core also not white also unconventional looking and idk was a late blooemr sexually a little so. IDEK. but yeah im trying to have a healtheir relationship to how i view myself but its fucking hard

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faszaakisshobbi · 1 year

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vent

tw: sh and ed mention

I'm a terrible person.

all I want is her attention and love more than she gives it to others and I don't normally get this jealous. I don't even know if it was jealousy, if so it isn't the kind I normally feel. I felt nauseous and lightheaded and now do each Time I think about it.

one friends has been going through a lot recently and I guess she told П some stuff and П requested to see her in the afternoon. she sounded really serious and has done similar things for very insignificant moments- that is just how it is with her a lot -but there was a tone with her voice that I could tell was different

so my friend went to her in the afternoon, into her office and closed the door. a lot of others were outside in the hall and classroom waiting for directions to start rehearsal and ready on stage and I had been okay before this, but they closed the door? I knew something was wrong from comments before, I could see my friend's face through the little square window and they weren't laughing I can tell you that.

I shouldn't feel like this! I don't think I could put the word "jealousy" to this feeling. I am also worried. my closest friend (which isn't saying much) and I have told each other a lot about what has been doing on in our lives, with our mental health, and I asked her "hey, are you alright." and she brushed it off and then said "I can't say". we haven't known each other for more than a year if im being honest, I shouldn't expect her to tell me everything. why do I feel so nauseous?

now my mind also went to П having said something about herself, but I can't see her doing that with this person. but maybe I am just being self centered and thinking she mostly only mention things to me. but my friends "I can't say" makes me think ???

why can't I open up to П? I have wanted to for so long especially in October and then again quite recently. my mother (after many months of not noticing at all but saying she knew me so well and knew everything that I thought) found out about my sh and said "you can always tell me everything" but continue judging me and making me feel bad. she sent me to therapy which I can't talk to this poor woman about anything other than Viola and orchestra to save my life. I just nodded and shook my head to all the questions she asked me relating it. I can't talk to her about anything and I think she thinks im getting better but I don't feel like I am.

but I have told П so much already why can't I come to tell her this!? she can't and won't "report" me for self harm if I tell her people are already trying to help and already know, I just need to get things out and I don't have anyone to tell. why can't П see how much im struggling when she can see tiny things in kids she hardly knows.

and maybe she does see how much I am struggling and all the tiny bits of love she's given me is just pity. does she just hate me but feel bad enough to make sure I don't kill myself. I mean, its not fully her job but it is her job, you know. its her job to make sure her students grow and she is a naturally kind person. so maybe I have just made all of this up? maybe I really am just another student.

why can't anyone see that I'm struggling? my grades have dropped so much over the past year and a half, its hard to complete assignments and then I will wake up in the middle of the night and lose sleep over them?! I have lost a lot of weight and hardly eat one meal in one day, i'm sure people have seen scars by now, seen changes in my mood, and nobody says anything. maybe they have noticed, and I guess i'm fine that most people don't "notice" (??) but my own mother and few close friends do nothing either.

I just want to tell her everything. in some ways she deserves to know but I don't want to be a burden on her. she has so much on her already and I know she is stressed to the point of making herself sick about competitions and performances. so why would I tell her? and I don't think I will have a chance to tell her after everything.

do I just want to tell her because I may never see her again?

why am I such a shit person? I shouldn't feel like this about my poor friend that just wants help. but I want help and love too.

#well this ended up being a lot longer than I thought haha

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empty-benches · 5 months

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smth abt recovery

(small ed tw ⚠️ //mostly talking abt the positives of my recovery w some references to my past experiences which may be triggering (no #s mentioned dw)- also it's kinda long my bad)

it's been a while since i've talked abt my past struggles w an ed or recovery but i thought i might just bc of how far ive come- like every recovery there's gonna be ups and downs, but after almost 2yrs of being in recovery i've managed to come a long way, and im proud of myself bc i never thought i would recover at all tbh

i've always loved to cook and bake and it's sm more fun when i can make and experiment cooking new recipes that i can fully enjoy and not the extreme lowcal bs (it doesn't taste good ikyk 😔😔). it's a passion and i only want to learn more now that im not so limited

also i have sm more energy than i used to- dw im still an adhd burnout but i never realized how much of a difference eating had on ur energy and mood until i started recovering. plus i started to be able to feel my feelings again, the good and the bad. but i think its worth it to take the risk of crashing and burning than to not be able to experience how much good there really is in the world. there are some amazing things to feel and experience in life if u only let yourself open up and actually feel them

and i'm so so glad to be over the internalized fatphobia i had going on too. getting over internal biases takes time but is well worth it. i may of not thought or acted badly towards fat ppl, but part of the ed i'm recovering from was the fear of being seen as fat myself- which there is absolutely nothing wrong with being. you should be able to be happy and confident in whatever shape or size your body comes in. we have this one life and you can do whatever you want really, don't let anyone (including urself😤) make you miserable over something as unimportant as your size. there's sm more to life than that

but hey this is just my experience,, and for me im never looking back from recovery- its done me sm good. also i know at the end of the day,, eds are a coping mechanism- even if its a really terrible one. if you are struggling thou, im sorry for what youre going through, pls just try to get through today, appreciate all the little things that bring you joy, let your feelings rise through you like smoke and find yourself some ways to let them out

thx for reading if you did lol, bit of a longer post here but i hope you have a good day- here's to 2yrs of recovery and to many yrs to come✌🏽

#ed recovery #personal #ana recovery #mia recovery

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yippieitsarvensart · 7 months

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OK OK SO !!! HCS FIRST 👇👇

both the tweels > bpd, autistic. also partially blind in both eyes and wear contacts (morays have shit eyesight), their vision gets shittier the lighter the ambient, + they have shit balance but are pretty fast. they have long hair shaved on both sides, are black w/ vitiligo, notable on their face on the same side of their black hair strand (stolen hc), and have freckles with their merform's colors. oh and their gills never go out so they can breathe underwater + their ears are that shape i drew on floyd always, bc the potion cant take those things away. they have some scars from brawls in the ocean. in my head they also purr. AND theyre both transfem. to me. (they use any prns but mostly he/she) + theyre every gender under the sun & bissexual/panssexual, they date everyone regardless of gender

floyd specific > adhd. gets overwhelmed pretty easily and his meltdowns consist of him whining and crying and breaking stuff and wanting attention. can understand tone when hes in a good mood only + has super control of his tone & voice, not masking just very good w it. he can toletare tight clothing but as long as its 1 item, prefers large ones. also he likes enclosed spaces and needs stimulation 24/7, never stops never stills, either has music or is fidgeting. special interest is fashion (mostly shoes) :3c

jade specific > slight ocd. its not that big but its there. hard to get overwhelmed but when he does he breaks and throws everything around him, even people. has more difficulty w tone and his face + voice is almost always stuck in that customer service one, poor guy. absolutely LOVES tight clothing and tight spaces. hes not very hyperative hes just chillin most of the time. vibrating slightly sometimes when hes vv happy. special interest is mushrooms ofc!

bonus riddle > bdp, autistic, ocd. also has depression & anxiety. uses he/she and is transfem bigender sapphilean (mlm wlw) ! the white strand you comented abt on my art (thank you sm for the kind comments btw <33) is a hc that i have about the after effects of chap 6. she ended up having that white strand and cant seem to get it out no matter what... has dyed it before but gave up eventually. anyways she has chronic pain on her wrists bc of writing so much! i also hc that his overblot left burn scars on his arms, legs & face. in the begginings of nrc time he had an ED, but after his 3rd year he was very recovered and is now pudgy. her special interests are books & hedgehogs :D

(+ i can talk abt silver & sebek if you want :3c)

ANYWAYSS, jchshjds riddle is so silly hes so unaware of social clues poor guy..... its so funny that hes the only one out of the loop there. but they work it out eventually....

honestly im convinced sebek would try asking him on a date and riddle would accept but he would know it was a date. and this happened for a long time. until riddle told trey & cater about him, sebek and silver hanging out and they were like "riddle.... thats a date.... you guys are doing things boyfriends do" and hes all "we are What." jdjwndjsn

I DO HAVE TIME give me some ingredients (ideas) and i'll cook (write) . bc unfortunelly i am not so big on ideas rn 😔😔

also THE IMAGE ?!!??!(($!? HGJDHS ive saved it its so silbekrid....

I was literally looking at this in the morning while eating breakfast like "I'll respond to this after I eat" Now, 7:30pm, I start writing out a response. smh.

YOU LITERALLY HAVE THE CREATIVEST MIND EVER?? THE REALEST THOUGHTS IN THE GALAXY???

I have actually mentioned before that I also think the twins have shit eyesight and how I think it goes down is like; ONLY JADE uses contacts, Floyd finds the idea of putting those things ON YOUR EYEBALLS is like actually disgusting he would rather DIE. So he- Like Jade -Has prescription glasses, but he never uses them unless he's in his own room and wants to actually see clearly. Azul insists he wears them while working in the lounge because he doesn't need Floyd tripping over and breaking things, it would be annoying to clean up after him. (translated: I really don't want you to get hurt please wear ur glasses so I can stop worrying about you) I don't actually have hcs for the twins' sexualities n' genders but I feel like they're so nonbinary spectrum 2 me... and also bi/pan is so real 2me now thhank you... Tweels purring real... idc if eels can't actually purr they can now... The separate-specific hcs I agree with it all, very very super real

YES go ahead and talk about the other two as well I love your massive awesome brain it's so full of things and I need to study you under a microscope methinks... I love love love Silver especially, he's one of the characters that when I hadn't played twst yet he caught my eyeee and I was like !!!! :OOO pretty boy alert!! Although with Sebs it took a little longer, I've only just recently started liking him a lot more but with the help of hcs and deep diving into lore I have quickly warmed up to his character... Love the boy Love him <33

and Riddllleeee... ohhh Riddle <3333 I'm #FallingInLove for real (take this part as inspo for a fic if you want boo, I can write prompts all day) Riddle just being so confused when caycay n' Trey tell her he's been going on dates this whole time. Like why didn't I get told about this. Have we been dating this entire time and I didn't know. And then she has a crisis and freaks out about it because "what if Sebek and Silver didn't know either and they are literally just my friends and they see me as a friend-" and all these 'what if's' go through his head and it makes him go. coo-coo. So he's extra irritable, too many heads are rolling once again, and she's trying extra hard to avoid/ignore/turn down any of Sebek's and Silver's offers to hang out BECAUSE SHE JUST FEELS SO AWFUL ABOUT IT like they really. REALLY need to talk it out. SebeSil go to someone else (can't think of any1 rn, maybe lilia?) to ask for advice on what to do... AUUGHHH then idk 1000 words later they k-k-kiss and make up (like the song. aha)

#arvy asks #arvy... writes prompts?#also I did read the other ask abt ur response to the playlist #I just couldn't think of what to say in response so #I mean I think I accidentally deleted the ask but whatever #I read it don't worrieee

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winterrose42 · 2 years

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My parents noticed I'm in a better mood and mom was asking if anything good happened and I'm just like...I don't really know how to explain my mood right now?? How do you explain....like okay how do you say to your parent that lives with you and has lived with you for 23 years now that you've been in a depressed unmotivated haze with being low grade sick with no energy since august, you stopped writing (btw mom i write haha) bc no energy so that was an outlet taken away and then november hit and you had to force yourself to draw bc that was the last thing you had and if you're doing it for others for christmas that has to be okay right? And you thought your cat was gonna die and your brain wanted dissociate but you couldn't bc you were the only one taking care of him so you just kinda floated on autopilot and it was only the last few days of november first few of december you finally came fully back online with with no passive suicidal thoughts to be had and noticing pretty things around you again and feeling like life is okay actually and then getting overwhelmed and crashing and you falling into the weird brain mood of "which body parts are real and i now have to argue against my brain bc for some reason it refuses to connect to reality" and then everything clicks back into place and the depression is just a really quiet frequency which is really nice and there's no anxiety to be had and you look in the mirror and actually feel connected to yourself and recognize yourself for the first time since summer and how the actual hell, living with me, did you not realize how dead i was i would not move for hours was it really that normalized that you just glanced over it how the heck loud do i have to be????????

#winter speaks #.......rant over i am mildly annoyed #like fucking dude??????? your spawn wohld lay in bed in a blanket puddle doing nothing but stare at a wall #for days on end and only get up for chores and food that he then didnt eat half of or would puke up bc he couldnt stomach it #i??? and then youre acting....suspicious of my better mood??? especially since im moving #and getting things more stretched out and circulated than theyve been in months i can do more bc im not in constant #severe pain anymore. in my humble opinion that was kindof a bad episode that lasted literally three #and half fucking months. how loud do i have to be to have shit like that noticed and just- i didnt even want taken care of #or talked to or anything by them a simple ''hey i actually noticed you and saw you maybe arent doing great are you okay?''#would i have lied and said i was just tired?? of fucking course!!!!!!! would the thought still have been nice???? yeah!!! you know what #it would have been!!!!!! shit man i didnt notice it was a depressed downswing until i came out of it but looking back it #was at least a little bit obvious jfc #anyway i saw a bird today and it was lovely and its cold but i walked outside in bare feet bc i could and it was really nice fuck #and yes i realize tgis post is stupid bc i couldve just asked for help but i didnt realize i needed to!!#i live with two people how did no one see i wasnt doing shit and wasnt eating???? im not even in the same room as them #ninety percent of the time and i still knew what tgeur schedules were and what tgey did in the day #and what their moods were so i could avoid them when they were in bad ones fuckin hell #what do i tag this ive been rambling so much im sorry #depression tw #ed tw #just in case idk

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lxvebun · 3 years

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So… I know you have 2 HC’s of this now. But may I make a request of some more chubby reader x Dabi 👉👈 I absolutely adore reading your other ones, especially if I’m not in a good mood it makes me feel better!

Dabi + his beautiful chubby partner pt 3

A/n Hi angel ofcourse! Im so happy you like the other ones and i hope you like this one as well! I tried my best not to repeat too much from the other ones. I love writing chubby reader fics but in the future when you guys want to request one please give me scenario cause im worried i will start repeating too much with general hcs xc

English is not my first lanuage so im sorry for any mistakes

CW dabi calls you babydoll,baby. Cursing. mention of disorderd eating (you dont actually do it) sickingly fluffy cause mans is such a simp for you as he should be

Dark content, k!¡nk and ed blogs fuck off, do not interact, leave my fics. how can I make it anymore clear that i don't want you here?

-♡this man is so head over heels in love with you its ruining his edgy villain reputation. you're on his mind constantly and he wouldn't have it any other way

-♡lets be very clear Dabi loves you for more than just your looks, I mean, it's you! You're absolutely amazing no matter what you look like.

-♡But your appearance is *chefs kiss* your pretty face, your soft arms, thick waist, squishy thighs😤 everything is so soft, and beautiful, and comforting about you. He wonders what good deed he has done in his life to be blessed by the sight of you.

-♡Your thighs are not safe around this man. He's touching them, poking them, laying on top of them, kissing them all the time, especially when you show a bit of skin.

-♡also your hugs and cuddles *faints* he just melts everytime you pull him into your arms. It's his own soft little heaven.( pls come cuddle me as well ty)

-♡you don't ever have to worry about anyone saying anything mean to you because Dabi will have turned them to ash before they could even get the words out. No one disrespects his beautiful babydoll

-♡as I said, no one disrespects his baby, so he is also not going to let you disrespect yourself. At this point he can just sense it

" I don't like my body" you mumble under your breath

*Dabi breaking down the door*

"I heard you were talking shit"

-♡Dabi is very protective, and he knows the bullshit plus size people have to endure, and how it affects them, so man needs to know that you're eating enough. Whenever he's home it's not weird for you two to start feeding eachother little bites of your meal, and if he's out he either calls you while you're eating or makes you send him pictures of your food.

-♡it may sound a bit controlling, but it's more so that he doesn't have to worry about your health and safety. Seeing you eat enough is kind of a comfort thing. He knows you're okay, you're safe, and you're caring for yourself

-♡Dabi needs you on his lap at all times. You walk past him to sit on the couch? No, you're not, he has pulled you into his lap and it is now time to cuddle.

-♡as I mentioned in my Dabi as your boyfriend fic, he really likes to dance with you, so you have to be prepared to be randomly carried bridal style or thrown over his shoulder because he decided it's the perfect time for dancing

-♡you're his beautiful, amazing, chubby partner that makes him feel so loved and safe. He adores you and he will do whatever he can to protect you from all the nasty stuff in the world.

dc blogs and that also includes if you reblog dark stuff stop interacting with me, k!nk and ed blogs do not interact you will be blocked

Thank you for reading bunnies<3

♡navigation♡ ♡Dabi masterlist♡

♡byf/dni♡

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cunaeparker · 4 years

Note

Hey love! Maybe some angsty when reader is jealous of Tom and Zendaya friendship and she starts trying to be like her by not eating anymore and he starts to catch on after some premier... Fluff at end (Not promoting don’t eat, you should never,i just had a similar situation and got help from it)

sure bby 💕 hope you’re doing okay now !!

***

! ED WARNING !

im currently taking requests for those of you that don’t know, so feel free to send stuff in. in relation to this ask, in no way do i support not eating, and in no way do i condone looking down on yourself & your body! we’re all perfect in our own ways, and this blurb is a good representation of that. mental health is so important. i want all of you to feel the best you can, and i wish the best upon everyone reading. 💕

MY MASTERLIST

Word Count: 1.4k

Summary: an intervention is staged, and she’s caught

***

Chocolate

"Would you like an éclair, ma'am?"

"No, thank you," Y/N declined politely. "I had a snack before I arrived."

"I see. Have a good night."

"And you, too."

The waiter stalked off, gait unbalanced and left leg staggering, offering more French treats with inviting smiles to new guests.

Indeed, it was all fine and dandy, and there was nothing to dampen her mood — besides the lack of food she had consumed and the uncomfortable grumbling in her stomach that made her body ache and long for a taste of something, of course.

She needed it now, and admittedly, she was starting to feel a little queasy.

Sighing (though oddly enjoying the feeling of accomplishment coursing through her veins), her eyes trailed longingly at the silver platter of French donuts as it bobbed away through a crowd.

The éclairs looked delicious, chocolate ganache covering the oblong dough, ends glistening with creamy filling, lights reflecting on the topping; enough calories to satisfy her for days, surely —

"You didn't eat anything before we arrived, Y/N."

She whipped around.

Tom stood beside her, hand in hers, gazing down at her concernedly: He looked handsome tonight, wearing a maroon suit and black slacks with gold accents, hair natural and minimally styled; but the thing that put her off was the look on his face — his eyebrows were furrowed into a concerned line, and the coffee brown eyes looking her up and down were filled with unease.

She felt her heart stutter.

And suddenly, the flashing lights from outside the facility became too much.

"Why did you lie, love?" Tom asked. "You didn't eat anything all day. Are you alright?"

His grip on her hand tightened, offering her a confused little shake, but she only smiled tautly, ignoring the angry grumbling inside of her stomach.

"Yes, of course I'm alright," she replied. "I'm just... not hungry, that's all." She shook his hand reassuringly. "It's normal."

It's really not.

Tom bit his lip but looked unconvinced.

She caught onto his look of unease and shot him another smile, but that seemed to be the thing to put him off even more — his frown deepened and his grip tightened. Suddenly, he began walking inside of the premiere facility, guiding her towards the unused rooms near the back.

"What are you doing, Tom?" She asked, feeling a ball of nervousness ring its way around her insides, "where are we going —?"

"Bullshit."

She paled and ripped her hand from Tom's, affronted.

"What?"

"I know that you haven't been eating."

And then suddenly, for no reason, tears welled in her eyes.

"No, you don't," she whispered, backing away slowly until her back hit a wall. "You know nothing, Tom."

Tom's eyebrows furrowed. "What?"

"You... you don't need to know anything. About how I'm doing, emotionally."

Tom's eyes narrowed. "Yes, Y/N, I do." He moved forward and grabbed her hand, still holding it when she flinched and gasped, trying to move away. His grip tightened but his eyes became soft. "I'm your boyfriend, love — your lover — and I need to know how you're doing. Down here," he gestured to her stomach, "and up here."

He pressed his finger to her forehead. He tapped gently and smiled.

And then her breaths became heavier and her chest became unstable and she exploded.

Words poured from her mouth like vomit. It felt like bugs were crawling up her throat, constricting her airways, and at one point, Tom had to hush her and guide her to a chair, sitting her down and weaving his fingers through her hair... and soon, she told Tom everything: Every gruesome detail, every small bit.

Everything.

Tom pulled away slowly from her, arms previously wrapped in a tight, comforting hug.

"You don't have to feel like this," he whispered, eyes rimming with tears and throat bobbing as his fingers continued to run gently through her hair, "you could've just told me before it got to this point —"

"But that's the thing," she spoke, voice hoarse and tired. "I couldn't. I just... couldn't. I was scared. I didn't want you comparing me, or thinking I was less than others, or... I don't even know, I just don't want this to change your opinion on me and I was so scared that it would, and I love you too much to lose you, Tom —"

"Then trust me to love you with what you have, Y/N," he said firmly, holding her tighter as she sniffled. "You know that I love you and I don't want you changing for anyone. Anyone. Not even... not even anyone else in the future, even if we do part ways, because if they want you to change, then they just aren't the one for you! It's so stupid, this dumb 'beauty standard' bullshit, and though Z might fit into that category it doesn't mean that you don't." He leaned closer and held her tighter. "You are so unique and beautiful, and I love every part of you, from your head," to pressed his fingers to her forehead again, wiping away a stray tear with a small laugh, "to your stomach," he pressed her midsection, having her lips twist up into a watery smile, "and to your toes."

He ran a hand up her leg and squeezed, causing her to laugh again and wipe away a tear.

A few seconds passed, and in that time, she felt the truth of Tom's words. She was herself, no one else, the only copy; and in truth, she mostly realized how much Tom loved her, and how much he loved her back.

They both deserved each other, and though that truth was found in a cramped storage room, it still meant all world to her. To them.

"Tom, I love you," she whispered, biting her lip. Her gaze was consistent on the floor. "I... I don't know where I'd be without you."

Tom's face lit up ever so slightly.

"Love, I don't know either," he replied quietly, pressing his forehead to hers. "All I know is that you deserve where you are and you deserve the body you're in. Don't let anyone or anyone else's opinion take that from you."

"Of course," she whispered, before leaning closer to connect their lips in a sweet kiss that held every word of reassurance, taste of chocolate, and admittance of love.

***

tags :

peter parker taglist ➝ @galaxystern08 @averyfosterthoughts @pparkeramorr @peterparkermadness

tom holland taglist ➝ @thenoddingbunny-blog @galaxystern08 @coni-marti @inhumanwithpowers @softholand

mutuals ➝ @quackeroos @parkersbliss @chaoticpete @cosmicholland @stardustom @mannien @my-patronus-is-mabel-pines @silteplaittais-toi @spideygirl2003 @yoinkyourheart @darlintom @dreamofaprilsblog @the-crazy-fanfictionist @peterspideyy @eridanuswave @thirzaholland @t-holland2080 @peachyparkerr @parkeret @etoileholland @j-romanoff001

#tom holland #peter parker #tom holland fanfiction #peter parker x reader #tom holland smut #tom holland one shot #marvel #peter parker smut #mcu #tom holland blurb #tom holland hcs #tom holland fic

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dangan-happy · 3 years

Note

[HARK! That sounds like an ask that has just come in!] to rantaro. miu. and tenko

tw ed

ive been unable to sleep recently, and its almost. that. time of the month and its adding extra stress and irritation. on top of that i don't get along with my family and don't have anyone to really go to when im upset. but i just dont feel like im good enough and ive been coping by not eating at all, to help make me look prettier and everything hurts so much. i also am thinking that i am trans. and well, my parents are pretty.. against that and im not sure what to do. may i have a hug and maybe some reassurance?

Hey anon, I'm sorry to hear you're going through all that. From what I've seen, that time of month always seems to come at the worst time. There are some over the counter medications that can help stabilize mood swings and help with cramps, and I'd look into that if you think that can help you. Ok, you've probably heard this before, but not eating isn't gonna change anything. It'll only make things worse. That can lead to more mood swings, and honestly, you gain more weight when you don't eat for a long period of time. Your body starts to panic because it's starving, and brings out the reserve, last-ditch-effort nutrients to try to keep itself alive, which can result in weight gain, and by the time you lose that, you're really not in a great spot. Since you're not close to your family, is there a teacher or counselor you could talk to? I've been where you are, and honestly the only way to really help with eating disorders is professional help. Try to get help as soon as possible before it gets worse, and things can get worse fast. I'm sorry you're in pain. You really don't deserve to be in that state. So please, please reach out. I promise the help you need is out there.

You don't need to be prettier, you're perfect just the way you are. No matter what body type you have, or what gender you want to identify as, your body is just fine, and you don't need to hurt it or yourself. I'd focus on the eating disorder stuff first, to make sure you're in a safe headspace to really think about your gender identity. Regardless if you're trans or not, the important thing is that you're safe. I'd do some research, read the stories of other trans people, and just give it some thought, but not until you're in a healthy and safe headspace ok?

I'm sorry your parents aren't supportive of that, it makes me real sad to hear that. If you do want to transition, I promise that there are lots of communities of people who will support you, and I support you too, no matter what happens. Yeah, of course you can have a hug! I'll stay with you for as long as you need me ok? Please try to get the help you need, you don't deserve to hurt, and there's a much better life waiting for you.

Ugh, what a shitty thing to be going through while you’re trying to get some shut eye, it’s the worst. And when your family won’t shut up, jeeeez.. I can’t even imagine.

Look, you’re definitely good enough, even if it doesn’t feel like it. Beauty isn’t defined by standards, I mean look at me, I’m a gorgeous genius! And you’re beautiful the way you are babes, you need to eat properly before you fall ill. I would hate to know you’re feeling awful because you aren’t eating meals on the regular.

Transphobic parents…ugh, that shit can really tough to deal with.. I’m not sure how old you are anonymous, but I want to recommend you planning on moving out if you’re unable to. Coming out to parents that aren’t supportive can be a really difficult thing to come across. Especially when there are shitty parents out there that do kick out their own kids because they can’t seem to get in a good mindset to support something that isn’t wrong at all.

Of course you can have a hug babes, everything will be ok, I promise you.. Your parents may not support you potentially being trans…but I sure as hell do.

#danganronpa #danganronpa roleplay blog #ask #rantaro amami #miu iruma #mod rantaro #mod rockstar

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littlebigafterdark · 3 years

Note

I'm feeling in a particular mood for some more Logan stuff, (totally not my comfort character who unfortunately is a medium for a lot of angst /s) so maybe the almost-relapse?

the littles accidentally trigger logan's ED (janus and patton help him thru it)

This is a copy pastd from a really long message i sent to liv a few weeks ago, just in case the grammar is weird or somethin!

oOo

context: whenever roman is a brat and refuses to eat dinner, logan gets noticeably more frustrated than with any other bratty behaviour because it hits too close to home to his eating disorder

so...

one day when patton is out somewhere, maybe at his carpentry class ((thats actually slightly spoilers for a big concept for the main blog lol)), logan has both the littles

and roman is bratty and refuses to eat dinner and logan breathes evenly and tries not to worry abt it bc he KNOWS roman always eats, hes just doing it to be annoying, breathe, he isnt actually restricting its ok

and logan was literally holding the baby fork up to vees mouth and suddenly she giggles and pushes it away

"come on baby, yummy time" logan coos and smiles a little but he doesnt feel it, and with his other hand he tickles lightly under vees chin and she giggles and logan smiles and goes to feed her again

but she pushes the fork away and babbles "mo bima!"

and roman laughs "yeah, no dinner! no dinner!" and bounces

and logan is feeling rlly shaky and hot suddenly and swallows thickly and ignores roman, and keeps looking at vee "princess, please open up," trying not to pay attention to how shaky his voice is. "its papa's spaghetti remember? yummy" he nods enthusiastically and goes to feed her again

but again vee just giggles all squeaky and pushes the fork away and looks at roman with a big smile for his approval. and roman is like "yeah vee! rebellion!!!" still so playful

but he hasnt noticed logans chest is heaving a little and hes staring at where vee pushed the fork away and logan was too shaky not to drop it on the floor.

and he looks up at vee and how small she is and how shes genuinely on the lower end of average weight and they need to make sure she doesnt dip down into underweight and thinks about how terrified he is of the idea that if she did develop an ED like he did it would be so dangerous and he cant see his baby go through that and-

it just hits him so so so harshly and hes suddenly crying and roman and vee freeze and look at him. and he hurriedly wipes away his tears and breathes shakily and tries to say again

"vee pl-please just ea--" and his throat closes up, he cant even say the word 'eat' and he gags on his tears and jumps up from his chair to run out to the downstairs bathroom and locks himself in trying to calm down and stop gagging.

and he can hear vee crying and roman - adult now - promising her its okay, mama feels a bit sicky but everythings okay, lets phone nana, its ok baby

and logan is breathing too fast and shaking and crying with his back against the bathroom door, not gagging anymore, but unable to take himself outside

. he hears roman feeding vee, and vee giggling and clearly enjoying the food, but no matter how comforting that is to hear he cant get over that genuine terror he felt when vee refused to eat, its his worst nightmare for vee to develop disordered eating - for any of them, but vee is already very thin and it could be critical, and logan cant get over that

when janus arrives (barely ten minutes later, he must have jumped in the car straight away which is only used for emergencies bc of janus' partial blindness) he speaks quietly to roman, and of course theyre trying to be subtle

but the kitchen is only across the hall from the bathroom and logan hears every word of roman explaining what happened and how confusing it was and how patton wont be home for another forty five minutes and roman didnt want either vee or logan to be alone but they probably shouldnt be around each other right now since vee gets so upset when the others arent happy

roman tries to talk to logan first through the bathroom door, apologising for misbehaving and promising he wont do that again. but can logan tell him what exactly was so bad about it this time? so roman can not do whatever it is in future.

but logan cant bring himself to say anything. he cant tell roman about this at least not yet he hasnt felt ready yet even if its been years and he doesnt know if he ever will be ready to tell roman about his ED

so after realising logan wont talk to him, roman swaps with janus. janus doesnt know the details but he knows theres something about logan and eating and hes made an educated guess from all the fibs hes heard over the years.

"hey, dic" (janus' unsavoury nickname for logan that he insists is just short for dictionary) "do you need a glass of water?"

logans throat is actually dry from hyperventilating and he says with a quiet scratchy voice through the door "yes please"

and when janus brings it to the door he just knocks gently and when logan opens the door to accept it janus doesnt make any comment on logans messy hair where hes run his hand through it or on his glassy red rimmed eyes or on the tremble of his fingers. but he does say "i know it must be so cozy in there" he nods to the cramped cold bathroom "but you might just prefer it in your room"

logan flushes a little and nods, comes out of the bathroom and heads to the stairs, but he pauses at the bottom of the stairs thinking... he doesnt know if he can be trusted alone upstairs. theres another bathroom up there and the gagging has made his stomach churn and he feels FULL from dinner and if only he emptied it then maybe he would feel better right? .... no

so he rasps without turning back to janus "i... i cant be alone"

"look behind you, idiot" janus says and its far closer than logan remembered him being.

he whips his head round to see janus was following closely behind him. janus raises a pierced eyebrow "well, are we going to stand in the stairway all night?" and of course its snarky but its soft too

so logan breathes deeply and they go upstairs to his room. janus makes himself at home, immediately grabbing a book from logans book case and collapsing sideways in logans armchair as soon as they stepped in the room. logan reclines on his bed and sips his water and does breathing exercises and tries to not feel humiliated about this breakdown

every time logan tries to apologise for disturbing janus' evening (he didnt) or asks if janus is sure roman is grownup enough to look after vee appropriately (he is) or insists that he is okay to be left alone now (he's not) janus just murmurs "shut up im reading"

when patton gets back roman just tells him logan isnt feeling good and patton hurries up to see him - and upon seeing his husband logan is overcome by shame that he almost relapsed and relief that his best friend is here and a wave of tears that he tries and fails to blink away

and janus just quietly bids them good night and promises he'll stay a couple hours to keep roman and vee company, but patton insists he stays the night in pattons room (its not safe for him to drive in thr dark) and janus is used to this routine by now that he knows where the spare pillows are

so janus leaves quietly and logan croaks "thanks, old man" trying to sound casual but regretting it when his voice shakes. janus just holds up a peace sign and closes logans door behind him on the way out.

as soon as the door closes logans face crumples and he hides his eyes behind his arm and patton practically bounds over to logan and climbs onto bed next to him and cradles logans head to his shoulder as he cries

they stay like that, cuddling in bed, patton cradling logans head and kissing the nape of his neck and wrapping his arm around logans waist to spoon him and whisper about what happened and how they can avoid it in future

but mainly they just breathe and cry together and patton fills the hours with soft affirmations of love and getting logan a tea and promising its okay if logan wants a cookie with it but logan says maybe later (later turns out to be 2:30 in the morning but at least it really was later)

they barely sleep that night but its all comfort and talking and by morning despite being exhausted, logan feels safer and breakfast goes by without a hitch

oOo

just some notes me and liv made that i think highlights some main points:

logan struggling so much even when he knows that the kids are just playing around and they don't really mean that they don't want to eat, but it's just one of those things that inevitably hits too close to home

it just suddenly hit him! like any other day he can cope with roman doing that, its a small blip usually, but the fact that VEE started refusing food freaked logan out so much bc they genuinely have to keep an eye on her weight just bc shes naturally so small

his emotions about his history with an ED plus his overprotective mama cg space making him nearly go into a panic attack from the thought that vee could develop an ED is very sad and very true

and janus coming right away!! and he and roman handle the siatuation so well, like roman was so smart knowing not to leave logan alone, and janus calling him dic and taking him to his room and staying there until patton gets back

and him crying from just seeing patton because he's his best friend and he can be vulnerable around him is very :'c <3

hes so so relieved to see patton but theres also the slightests "ive let my husband down" bc he thinks bc patton helped him so much he owes it to patton to not relapse - but of course pat reassures him its natural to relapse but he didnt! he caught it in the early stages and asked for help and patton is never disappointed in him

he caught it!!! he caught it and he stopped himself and he let himself be helped by both roman and janus and patton and he didn't even relapse!! and this whole thing is really a sign of how far he's come that he was able to accept their help in his vulnerable state, even if roman and janus didn't have the full story, they still wanted to help him through whatever he was experiencing

#mama logan #little big eating disorder #do not reblog #long post #asks #adorable undead queen #little big after dark concepts

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hungerishome · 3 years

Text

I’m back... nobody noticed I was gone, nobody cared, nobody knows who I am but alas here I am nonetheless announcing my return...

Thought it wasn’t helping me being here... But actually I think I was using this in the wrong way. I thought Tumblr was responsible for my age old patterns of behaviour linked to the same traumatic cycle of starve and binge over and over and over again but let’s face it. It wasn’t Tumblrs fault (insert laughing crying emoji here). I thought that because i’ve suffered for nearly 15 years now and a lot of that time I was constantly TRYING to stop eating for good without binging that I associated Tumblr with the starve/binge cycle and therefore should stop using it.

Well, thus far i’ve always kept diaries for myself and TO myself. I don’t share shit. I don’t let people in. My eating disorder has always been so private. Maybe THAT was the problem... not tumblr and if i changed the way i use tumblr by sharing more intimate thoughts and (well any) experiences then it stops being a site for just looking at pictures of people I want to have the frame of and becomes (hopefully) more of a community (even if it’s just me writing and posting things like this that people don’t read or respond to). I don’t know... lets see.

I am a chatty person. I’ll be your friend. I am super old though... closer to 30 than I am 20 so if you’re under 18 then maybe not but yeah... Never been a chatty person surrounding my ED and struggles (unless speaking about how i recovered lol) and I think it’s time for this to change. So here I am.

What do I want? Simple. Anorexia was most of my teens and early 20s, with periods of binge eating but that has mostly been the last few years where I’ve realised how much i’ve gained and lost control and desperately battled to regain it, resulting in awful starve/binge cycles.... so yeah, what do I want? I want release from binging. I AM NOWHERE NEAR UNDERWEIGHT. If anything i’m closer to overweight. So getting this under control not only is preventing me being overweight but also preventing me being so unbelievably triggered if i ever get to overweight that i may stop eating and be so scared to get that big again that I get hit relapse harder than ever. Funnily enough i don’t want that. Im too old for that now. I just want to be close to underweight, very slim and how i want to look and feel to AVOID complete hopeless relapse. And above all else a healthier relationship with food. I want to be able to go on fasts for health and not binge because of my eating disordered history patterns. IM SO OVER IT. IM OVER THIS SIZE, IM OVER THIS MOOD, IM OVER BINGING, ITS BORING AND IT STOPS NOW!

relate?

#anorexik #anamia #anorekcia #anarecia #ed binging #ednoez #disordered eating #eating disoder things #bulimiz #cw disordered eating #thinsppi #thin inspo #ednos #ana relapse

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familiaanteomnia · 3 years

Text

warning: mental illness, dysphoria-body image mentions, ED type mentions, shark week ish, bottom growth/related stuff n.sfwish? depending on how you take it- also packers,etc mention (naturally it varies by verse,etc but i’m mostly sharing pretty consistent information- also dont be stupid about any of this like i stg) -his puberty got kind of messed up like he so badly despised it, plus his mental health issues and all that basically by sheer force of messed up will/chemical backfires,etc it had an reaction like how stress affects those things as in... in regards to shark week was so inconsistent, so very much to the point he has these meds he’s supposed to take that basically kick his body the rest of the way into doing the process/is supposed to make it quick, done way sooner with less pain due to effectiveness even (he obviously forgets genuinely/fights against the whole situation leading to major cramps and issues even if he isnt bleeding) will go like 3 months of risking major health damage over it. (going on t makes this all worst because doctors like ‘okay now you really need to cause now you’re having more issues’ and he just- doesn’t) -really knows way too much medical shit in general, naturally he’s very much an ‘why does life work like this why are people so ashamed of normal stuff’ etc but also dude will balk at stuff like ‘ugh im on my period’ xav just grimacing inwardly all like why must i be reminded that’s an thing.. ha ha not me lemme repress shit as such dude will carry extras,etc but is very much trying to be an punk dudebro about it/even if is basically screaming internally about it all, trying to never think about that stuff -k.t tape binds most the time, if not just doesn’t bother cause of his body shape/type and mood+ outfit+ plans for the day. however he does own an binder, sports bras work and are more often the case. as such most the dysphoria hits in different ways, elsewhere (but with his general puberty complications/fast metabolism,etc he also just forgets he’s trans an lot like he gets hit in the crotch and falls over in pain then 10 seconds later like ha ha wait what the hell i’m not even packing) -dude is pretty slender,etc from his fast metabolism, shit eating habits (because he can eat like 5 whole pizzas and not get slightly full or bloated but also he frequently lives off like candy, energy drinks,etc vices...) though it also can vary to kinda athletic and he doesn’t seem like mega unhealthy at least lol in that department plus with what he wears,etc usually unnoticeable (he is super easy to pick up especially if unconscious even that add of dead weight is pretty light but like not easy to tackle) -totally pumps his bottom growth not even entirely in that ahem sesual way but in an genuinely helps with pain/helps with dysphoria (not that his growth is bad at all but also, it kinda helps with that too) like i mean obviously splurged too so he can just like pull some pants on, play video games or whatever as it does its thing -likewise doesn’t skimp on things like packers, has an major collection/gets lower dysphoria? dude will drop like 1000 dollars on more options even if has plenty that are high grade, expensive not even sesually though of course many purposes and he’s only an person like anybody else/plus that t juice fueling an already high libido,etc but anyways yes he sometimes prefers to be like lol glow in the dark d.ick is my packer even though i have an 3 in 1 that cost so much money and is multifunctional (also he 100% for fun, aesthetic, and boredom sometimes pierces them) -general body image issues/disconnect problems due to his mental illness more than dysphoria, being trans surprisingly more stuff like ‘oh right this is what my body is? you mean to tell me for the last 48 hours was watching myself in 3rd person but didn’t notice- oops.’ but also damn is he pretty much like i know i’m aesthetically pleasing, hot and i will flaunt it even if not quite full of myself -likewise mirrors? he makes faces at himself, flips himself off and has totally shattered an large amount of them because he started thinking too much about if his freckles are visible,etc same with reflections though isnt always super mega serious can just be to make himself giggle/habitual

#headcanons #♥ drabbles 》 xavior carver #(i just did an warning at the top cause to tag would be lengthy af)#(anyways feels good to put this all out into something lol)#(i swore i posted this but then my brain died aaaa)#(trans content hours tonight)#(i might ramble about my trans nathan take)#(in another after replies)

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actuallyjosten · 4 years

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I think the self dx post you shared doesn't really show the whole picture. I think butterflyinthewell's reply covers it pretty well. Obviously like teens saying people can't criticize them because they self dxed themselves with a bunch of stuff they clearly don't have is bad. But people saying "I have the symptoms of x but I can't get a diagnosis for whatever reason (money, controlling parents, lack of access), so I will use coping mechanisms targeted toward people with x" are valid.

note: i thought this response would be way shorter, im so sorry

SO heres the thing: i am privileged in every way you’ve mentioned; i’m in canada so i don’t pay for my doctor since my family is covered, my parents aren’t controlling when it comes to mental health (mostly), and like fuck its a long drive to my doctor but it’s 10000%%% accessible

also some complete honesty: i didnt consider the money reasoning bc US healthcare works differently than here in canada!

when i reposted it i was thinking more of the subpopulation of people i see and know who think theyre depressed or have an ED purely based on what they see on twitter and tumblr. they have some low moods and slap a label on it. they hate the way they look and chose to restrict eating a couple of times and slapped a label on it. mental illness is way more than this. self dx can be a label based on the surface symptoms. i dont condone self dx, i dont think anyone really does. self dx isn’t,,,, ideal.

furthermore, to reinforce what you’ve internalized via social media with labels is wrong for a multitude of reasons, and that’s really what i resonated with when i reblogged it. im taught in class the damages of self dx since im a psychology major, but unfortunately ive never considered the flip side of self dx.

ALSO: “so I will use coping mechanisms targeted toward people with x" are valid.” YESS!!! THISSS~! i’ll re-read the post to see if it contradicts this point in any way because literally!!!!!! yes!!!

more on that: i ran an anorexia/ED account before (that pro-ana shit) when i was younger, and the community is incredibly supportive of your own self-destruction. but even then i didn’t consider myself as someone with an eating disorder. since quarantine, my relationship with food is,, not much. but even then i dont “” qualify”” as someone with an ED. I dont have an ED because i haven't been diagnosed. i can say, and will say, i have disordered eating. there’s a multitude of differences between “I have an eating disorder” and “i have disordered eating/ a bad relationship with food”. this is the very topic my therapist and i are covering right now. so even tho i dont have an ED, i cant still get treatment for my eating problems.

anyone can benefit immensely with coping strategies that are used to treat mental illness! and therapy also isnt just for people with a diagnosed disorder. if i ever seemed i came off preaching otherwise, i cannot even begin to describe how sorry i am!

#edit: i forgot to do a read more thing #my bad

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