#it happened once and yet it's been happening every fucking time I close my goddamned eyes

[catcatb0y]

Stupid wounds should heal faster.

#this is such a petty resentment #why the fuck is it still here? #why is it all I can think about? #why does it make me feel sick? #why am I stuck with this overflowing nauseating grudge that I can't do anything about #I wanna yell #I wanna yell SO badly but it will make me look like an asshole #I wanna cry but I've already cried too fucking much #I can't even distract myself from the desire to vomit up my feelings because the internet in my laptop went out #and all I'm left with is this searing-- idfk /upsetness/ with no fucking outlet or solution #and every single fucking thing makes it feel so much worse #I just can't escape it #stupid wounds should heal faster #it's been days and yet it feels like it JUST happened #it happened once and yet it's been happening every fucking time I close my goddamned eyes #it's happened so many times behind my back but now that it's in front of my face I want to tear this fucking lump in my throat out #I want to tear my throat out with my goddamned hands #I'm so fucking tired #I hate this feeling #I hate this body #I hate this #I'm tired

[thesturniolos]

guilty pleasures (part 1 )

m. sturniolo x reader

authors note: this picture is actually sickening, need him too bad 🤞

this is all creds to my bae @iheartchrissturniolo thanks for the idea hun < 3 (part 2 including your idea yet to come)

summary: matt has a bit of a crush on his best friend, he’s fantasising ;)

warnings: smut, swearing !!

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

she looked heavenly by the pool today, irresistible to the point where my heart ached. i knew i couldn’t have her, i’ve only been reminding myself everyday for the past 6 years and it’s agonising.

the way the droplets of water fell off her golden skin, the bikini that accentuated her curves, oh so perfectly. and knowing i chose it for her was like the cherry on top of the cake. blue- my favourite colour - and hell she knew it when she bought it, she even told me. “i wonder why you picked this one” i remember her slight giggle after she said it, voice like silk, one that plays in my head at night.

she drags her hand through her hair, shaking it a little to get rid of the water, and boy do i wish it was me doing that. for me to be the one to look after her, to do the small things that weren’t so small to me. her eyes are closed and even though she’s been in the water, her makeup remained flawless - not that she needed it, she was absolutely gorgeous with and without.

she didn’t think this however, always telling me how she wishes she looked like anybody else. if she could only see what i see, just for a second, she’d never think that again. she’s better than any supermodel, the ‘prettiest of girls’ according to society weren’t a touch on her. plus, they didn’t come with her personality- she’s a real life angel and i’ve been blessed with even being in her presence.

i would spend every minute and every hour of my day telling her every little thing i love about her from the colour of her nails to the shape of her lips, i don’t care about the dents in her thighs or the stretch marks on her stomach, she’s perfect.

she’s walking closer to me with an arm outstretched, my eyes landing on the matching tattoo she has with me and i smile. i sometimes forget we had that done, which almost instantly brings me back to reality that she is and always will just be my best friend. i cannot afford to lose someone as special as her which is why i have to push those feelings to the side, as much as we want to be free.

her being so close to me and looking at me with those eyes, dark eyes that could mean so many things, made my cheeks blush the slightest red and i become desperate to hide this. what kind of friend blushes like a crazed guy in love when they look at them? it’s just a look, god.

“you got a towel?” there was that voice again, a voice i wish was in my ear forever. it wasn’t high - pitched nor was it deep, it was just in the middle, soothing. reminds me of the times where she held me whilst i cried, the bestest friend there is. reminds me of when she was so utterly drunk and slurring over her words, what was it again?

 ╭┈┈┈┈╮

“matt” she prods at my arm, waking me up.

“wassup” she frowns looking at my tired state, moving her hand to push hair out of my eyes.

“i’ve got a secret” i frown now, it’s 3am goddamn.

“what’s that”

“you promise you won’t tell anyone?” those little doe eyes drive me crazy, keep looking at me like that and i’ll have an accident.

“i promise” she leans in closer to my ear, her hot breath on my skin.

“i had a dream about you the other day” now i’ve piped up. i don’t care about the time or the sleep in my eyes, she fucking dreamt about me, i’m wide awake.

“oh yeah? good or bad?”

“depends”

“what’d you mean, depends?” once again, driving me crazy. she just knows how to do it.

“well, it depends how you take it.”

“go on.” i’m begging for this now, i need to know what the fuck happened, it’s killing me.

“well, we were doing something,” she twirls my hair in her hand, not looking me in the eyes yet all i can focus on is her and her words. “something best friends don’t do.”

“like what?”

“fucking.”

╰┈┈┈┈╯

held a chokehold over me. every night when i got in to bed i imagined her sleepy self, squirming about in her sheets to the idea of me pounding into her. suddenly i didn’t feel so bad about the hundreds of wet dreams i’ve had ‘bout her, we’re even.

but it only made me more delusional that we could actually be something. she was drunk and it was a dream, i was being dramatic if i thought it was actually something.

“yeah, it’s just there.” i say, pointing to the floor. she bends down to pick it up and i get the best sight of her boobs, pressed against the fabric of her bikini, pushed together ever so slightly. they looked so smooth, so pretty. something i just couldn’t take my eyes off..

“hello? matt?” she swipes her hand in front of my face and i’m so utterly embarrassed, knowing i’d been fixated on her tits. what an assy thing to do, how do i even begin to explain something like that?

“i- uh- i’m sorry! i wasn’t-“ she smiles at me and reaches out to scruff my hair, once again her boobs being directly in my face. is she doing this on purpose? because i’m about to cum in my pants.

“i take it you just really like your choice of bikini, hm?” she laughs, moving the towel to rest it on her hip as she turns around and struts off towards our house. she fucking knows what she does, not just to me but everyone.

i’ve been ignoring the poking in my pants for a while but it’s more prominent then ever now and i need to do something about it or i’m gonna come undone right here right now. it might be pervy but i quite literally cannot be around her when she’s close to naked, my mind travels to the dirtiest of places and to be honest, i’m careless.

if she’s going to act so calm about riling me up like that, then i’m gonna embrace the way she makes me feel. how she makes my cheeks hot and the wet patch that forms in my boxers when she whispers in my ear or now, shoving her boobs in my face.

praying that my jeans cover my painfully obvious hard-on, i quickly walk into the house, making a bee line for my bedroom, desperate to do something about what was happening in my pants.

“you okay, matt?” shes looking at me with a frown, the towel in her hair now as she begins to dry it, still wearing that flattering bikini that is just about to tip me over the edge.

“mhm, i- um, just need to do something.” i look around to see if my brothers are anywhere to be seen, something to distract me from this conversation, i so desperately need to get to that bedroom.

“oh? why’d you look so flustered?” she says with a smug, little smile.

“no reason. i just- i just need a second.” i go to walk away. as much as i would love to stay and talk, right now that is not what i need.

“need my help?”

tags: @strniohoeee @sturnsbaby @sturniolopepsi @malsturns @mattslolita @mattitties @mattsbratt @mattsturniolos @mattsturniolosgf @chrisdevora @christinarowie332 @chrisolivia4l @ilovemattsturn @sturniolossmut @sturnioloswife @sturniolosstar @freshlovehacker @kirby0strombolli @recklesssturniolo @lovingmattysposts @oversturn @ilovemattsturn @urfavstromboli @estelleswrld @strawberrysturniolo @dailysturniolo @deatthmatch @hoesformatt @justangelheree @klarasmith @kvtie444 @cabincorematt @caitifilms @bluesturniolo333 @mattsturnioloswattpad

#matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #sturniolo #comfort character #vinnie hacker imagines #vinnie hacker #vinnie hacker imagine #matt sturniolo fan fiction #matt sturniolo angst #matthew sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo angst #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo fanfic #chris sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo imagines

[imtryingbuck]

Affair

~ gif not mine credit to owner ~

Affair

Summary: Y/n founds out about her husband’s affair.

Word count: 1207

Warnings: Angst, Bucky is not good in this im sorry. Sad yet strong reader. Infidelity. Sharon and Steve. Little teeny tiny bit of body hate. Swear words.

A/n: there’s a line from my favourite song of Adeles.

Masterlist

Part 2

The day she found out her husband was having an affair it felt like time had stopped. Thousands of questions sworn inside her head, she didn’t blame her husband or the other woman nope she blamed herself. It was her fault her husband was unfaithful, it was her fault she had not been enough for him, it was her fault for not satisfying his needs. It was her fault. 

After the self-blaming and self-hating she moved on to anger. Angry at her husband betraying her, angry at the other woman - a woman she had called a friend for 15 years - angry at herself, just unadulterated anger. 

Then came the self-pity party, where all she did was cry and cry and cry. She would stand in front of the full body mirror just in her underwear, picking at every single detail on her skin hating what she saw in the reflection. Then she would cry even more due to the fact that after finally loving and being kind to her own body, she was back to hating it. However, she didn’t just feel sorry for herself, no, no she felt sorry for her husband, her children, her husband’s mistress and the husband of her husband’s mistress.

Oh and then there was denial - but that went straight out of her head pretty quickly, after all she did catch them going at it with her own two eyes.

And finally came acceptance. She accepted her husband’s extra marital affair, she accepted that she had been betrayed by two people close to her. Completely aware that her marriage was over and dead.

Her heart remained broken though, that would never change.

~~~

The sound of the door opening use to bring a smile on Y/ns face, sending her straight to the door awaiting him like a goddamn lapdog. Now though all it did was make her wonder which excuse she was going to be given. 

Sitting on the sofa with her knees pulled up staring at the tv screen, chuckling quietly to herself as Peter Griffin continues his antics, wondering to herself why Lois puts up with him. Already smelling the mistress’s perfume on him makes her roll her eyes. 

“Hey bab-“

“I filed for divorce.”

He actually has the audacity to act shocked “w-what do you mean? Bab-“

“Stop. Just stop. I know about your affair, I know you’ve been sleeping with Sharon for the past six months, probably longer I don’t know” mumbling the last part quietly “but all that matters is that I know so now we’re getting divorced.”

She sees him in her peripheral nervously shifting foot to foot, colour completely drained from his face, is that tears? Gross. Before he can even get a good enough excuse for his betrayal straight, she continues.

“Don’t say anything it’s not going to change my mind or decision. I spoke with my lawyer who thinks I’m being to kind - his words not mine - anyway I told him in don’t want money or the house from you. Custody will be split between us evenly” standing up wrapping her arms around herself “you know at first I wanted so many answers but now I just want to know one thing, do you think you can be honest for once? Do you actually think Sharon is going to want you know that I’m leaving you? Think you both can run off into the sunset and live happily ever after?” Using a baby like voice at the end she chuckles at his expression, she can’t tell if it’s heartbreak that she’s leaving him or heartbreak that his mistress isn’t going to want him anymore - laughable. 

“The answer is no by the way. I feel bad though, you both deserve each other. Both so wrapped up in your own selflessness that you were happy to ruin two marriages, two families! To betray, lie and deceive your spouses who happen to be friends! All for what? Sex?” Stepping back when he tries to reach out “don’t fucking touch me! Don’t you dare try and touch me AFTER you’ve been with her! What the actual fuck is wrong with you? And don’t you dare stand there and cry! You did this, you both did. Oh and Steve knows” Literally as she said that his phone started ringing “Go ahead and answer it’s probably your best friend or your mistress, go ahead James and answer” at the sound of his first name he flinched, he pulled his phone out and sighed, declining the call he looked back at the woman who he had the privilege of calling his wife. The mother of his children, the woman who he has loved from the moment he was introduced to her. The woman who he cheated on.

“I’m sorry” is all he could say, he really didn’t remember how the affair started or why on earth he continued it, he has this perfect wife at home, his other half his soulmate and he cheated, he couldn’t even give her a good enough excuse. His guilt was hitting like a ton of bricks, he betrayed his wife and his best friend all for a quick fuck that wasn’t even good.

“You’re sorry? I’m sorry too. I’m sorry that when the morning comes, you’re going to have no one. I feel for you James honestly - stop swaying you’re making me feel seasick, sit down.” Watching him sit on the chair she moves to sit where she was originally sat before.

“Listen I just want to get this off my chest before I go to bed okay, I have loved you so deeply that I honestly don’t think I’d ever stop loving you but James I can’t forgive you, maybe one day in the future I will but not right now. I have been stood by your side through every single thing that has happened to you, and yet you betray me. I don’t know what went wrong with us but whatever I did I’m sorry-“ when he tries to intervene she puts her hand up “Just listen! I’m sorry that our story has ended this way but i can’t trust you anymore or even stand the sight of you if I’m being honest. You have given me something that I can't live without, you mustn't underestimate that when you are in doubt. But this is where our story ends.” 

Wiping her tears with the sleeve of her jumper, she stands up stronger and taller than ever before. 

“You can sleep on the sofa or head to Sharon’s I know Steve said he’d be staying with Sam and Nat. Tomorrow I’ll be taking the kids to our new house and then I guess we’ll go from there” Shrugging her shoulders as she doesn’t know what else to say to him. “Goodnight James, I truly hope you all the best”

Once in the comfort of her bedroom she listens to hear his movements but all she can hear are his cries. Smiling sadly, she climbs into the bed, she fears the unknowing of what her future holds whilst also excited for it.

For the first time since she found out about her husband’s affair she sleeps peacefully.

~ banners credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

#bucky barnes #bucky barns x y/n #marvel #bucky barnes angst #marvel fanfiction #Bucky x reader #bucky x reader angst #Bucky x reader no comfort #marvel fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky x y/n #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky x you #bucky barnes x you #Bucky Barnes cheating #steve rogers #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x female yn #bucky x reader.

[ihopeinevergetsoberr]

Marry me again

Summary: You and Leon were forced to get a divorce two years ago due to his work constantly interfering with your marriage. However, despite the separation, the love between you both still runs deep. When you accidentally meet at a bar one late night, things quickly take an interesting turn.

CW: NSFW, Leon x Original Female Character, but technically still counts as Leon x Female Reader imo. Consensual Sex, Fingering, Vaginal sex.

WC: 11200~

i came up with the idea for this fic while roleplaying with a character ai bot. i would also like to warn you, that english is not my first language, so the fic might be written a little poorly to say the least lol. if you spot any mistakes (grammatical especially), any typos/misspelled words or if you have any advices for me in general: please let me know in the comments, i’ll be very happy with any criticism since this is my first fic in english. enjoy!

p.s. wrote this imagining leon from infinite darkness, i think he’s the best fit for this story.

She raised an eyebrow at the familiar low voice that echoed from behind her, the cigarette held firmly between her fingers. "Don't turn around, don't turn around, don't turn around," a mantra played on repeat in her mind, urging her to resist. Yet, she had already made up her mind. She knew, without a doubt, who it was. Despite everything that whispered against it, she defied the doubts. She pictured this happening too many times to just walk away.

Leon noticed the red polish on her nails and smirked. Apparently, such small details of her appearance, like this one, will forever remain unchanged. Even through the years. She turned around, her attentive eyes pierced right through him immediately, forcing his heart to skip a bit. She always had this "right into the soul" stare, he had to give her that.

It was their first encounter in two years outside the court. Their first encounter since the divorce.

"Hey," she whispered, a smile cracking across her face as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

His smile widened and a look of joy came over his face as he saw her, not quite able to hide the fact that he’d missed her. He then let out a breath and nodded at her. His eyes took in every detail, from her hair, to her nails, even to this small strand of hair out of its place.

“You look… fantastic, as always,” he told her, taking a few steps closer but still keeping a respectable distance.

She chuckled awkwardly at the statement, rolling her eyes at him. The wind caused that stupid strand of hair to stick to her cherry lip gloss, the same shade she used to wear when they were married. The same shade that used to stain white cups in their shared apartment, the collars of his shirts, and his lips and neck. A pleasant bittersweet memory made him bite his lip nervously. She was so goddamn pretty. And not his anymore. What a fucking shame.

"Well thank you, handsome," she returned the little compliment, getting the hair out of her mouth.

“I’m just telling the truth,” he assured her with a smile.

Leon wasn’t used to being called handsome, mostly because he didn’t really see himself that way. But it was nice to hear it, and it filled him with warmth. When she held the cigarette close to her lips — he finally realized that she wasn’t wearing her wedding ring anymore, and he felt a pang of sadness deep down inside along with the guilt, because he knew that it was partially his fault that they were divorced.

"So.." her eyes roamed over him once again with curiosity, a sigh escaping her lips. She took a drag on her cigarette, keeping eye contact, making Leon blush even deeper. "How have you been?..."

Leon gave her an awkward half-smile, reluctant to lie to her. He didn’t want to just spill his heart out to her right then and there either though.

“I’m… fine,” he said, clearing his throat. “Just busy… dealing with the usual stuff.”

Leon seemed like he was about to ask her something but then he hesitated, seeming unsure whether or not he should try it.

“And… you?” he managed to mumble illegibly.

"Relatively fine," she mumbled back, exhaling the smoke, her eyes sparkling in the city lights of the night. "What are you doing here?" She nodded at the bar behind their backs, curious to hear his answer.

He noticed the sparkle in her eyes, and he smiled a bit, thinking that she still looked exactly as he remembered. Leon noticed her nod at the bar and he followed her gaze. He raised his eyebrows, looking like he was thinking about just how much he should tell her. Then, he decided to keep it vague.

“Just… trying to unwind,” he said simply. She doesn’t need to know that every night he unwinds with several drinks, he definitely wouldn’t want her to think he’s a drunk.

"I see. finally on vacation, huh?" she giggled, feeling the awkward tension between them growing profusely in the air.

“You know me. Gotta get one sometimes,” he admitted with an amused expression, trying to lighten up the awkwardness between them. He was quiet for a moment, and she could see on his face that he truly missed her, despite everything they’d been through. Still, he wasn’t sure how to ask her what he wanted to ask her, so he let another moment of silence pass between them before speaking up again.

“And… how about you? What brings you here?”

"I had a date," she replied, taking another drag on her cig, not taking her eyes off him for a second, and he could’ve sworn to God that never in his life had he wanted her to look away so badly. But she never did. She was sinking his appearance in carefully, trying to figure out whether she touched something still sensitive inside of him or not.

Leon was hurt and a little devastated by her answer, and yet... he wasn't surprised. It was only natural that she had moved on with her life, even though the realization still hurt him like he'd been stabbed in the heart. His face fell and he looked away from her, unable to meet her eyes. He tried to hide his pain and put on a fake smile, not wanting to show her any weakness. He cleared his throat and looked at her again, trying to keep his tone casual.

"How did it go?" He asked her, trying to seem normal.

"Pretty bad, to be honest," she answered with a chuckle, clearly satisfied with the way his face dropped. She was there for the drama, he could tell she was just still as much of a tease as she used to be when they were still a couple.

Leon didn’t like being teased by her, especially when he was feeling so emotional. It was one of the reasons that he didn’t want to show her any weakness. He tried to keep from choking up and maintain a calm expression as he nodded at her.

“At least you made it out alive,” he remarked dryly, trying to keep his voice light. His face still showed pain and sadness, though.

She laughed at his joke, taking a step closer to him, the scent of her perfume, mingled with the lingering smell of cigarettes made him feel dizzy right on the spot.

"Yeah, I’m… still alive, I suppose. Sorry, Leon, your prayers have not been heard yet."

He was shocked when she stepped closer to him, and he had to take a moment to process it. Finally, he cleared his throat and took a small step away, keeping his hands to himself for fear of doing something that he might regret or making her feel uncomfortable. He glanced down at them, noticing how they were shaking a bit, then looked back up at her. His expression was soft now.

"Why the step back?" She raised one eyebrow at him, genuinely curious.

"I was about to say "I don’t bite”, but.. we both know that’s not true," she added with a smirk, her eyes lingering on his leather jacket for a couple seconds. Oh lord, was she.. tipsy?

Leon didn’t want to get too close to her on his own accord, because his instincts were telling him that doing so would make him want to tell her how much he had missed her, what a mistake getting the divorce was, and how much he still loved her. So he put some distance between them, still feeling an urge to reach out and touch her.

“Just…” he began, not really sure what to say, “Just giving you some… some personal space,” he finished with a shrug.

"I see," she nodded, then finally took her eyes off him to turn on her heels and throw the cigarette end away. She was so tempted to see what happens next.

Leon was also very tempted to do something, but then his mind reminded him of his current job and what could be at stake. Not only would it be immoral of him to make any attempt now, but it would also make him look unprofessional. It would just repeat the story. His busyness was probably the main reason of their divorce. Not to mention, what if she was already serious about another guy?

“If you… if you want, we could… hang out sometime…” he suggested. He swallowed hard and felt a lump in his throat, trying to act casual.

“Hang out sometime?" she looked him over her shoulder, a soft chuckle escaping her lips. "What are we, in highschool?"

He felt the heat rising in his cheeks, realizing that he probably worded it wrong. And as he felt his cheeks getting red, he felt a sudden urge to just kiss her. No questions asked. No more words. Just… a kiss.

Leon’s breathing began to get a little faster, and he wasn’t sure what to say next.

His heart was racing and his mouth felt dry like he’d downed a whole bottle of whiskey.

“I didn’t… I didn’t mean…” Leon began, still trying to recover from his blunder.

"Relax, i’m just fucking with you," she laughed it off, licking her lower lip.

"Wanna grab a drink before I head home?" she asked, nodding at the bar entrance again.

Leon breathed a small sigh of relief, happy that she was only messing with him and that he didn’t just make a big fool of himself. His eyes widened when she asked him to grab a drink and he raised his eyebrows in surprise.

“Uhm. Yeah, sure,” he said after a moment of thought, nodding, and then he followed behind her inside the bar. He knew very well what she meant by a drink and it made him feel both tense and happy at the same time.

The sounds of her heels clacking were interrupted with the loud music as soon as they stepped in. She led the way to the counter: it looked like she was familiar with the establishment already. Leon felt something he hadn’t felt in a while, it filled him with warmth, and he wanted to tell her that she looked beautiful, and that he missed her. But when he realized that she was familiar with the place, his face dropped. She probably had that fucking date here.

“What can I get you?” He asked her, once they reached the counter, looking around at the different options.

"Ah, just my usual," she hops on the stool, throwing her purse on the counter. She then glued her eyes back to him, a cocky grin playing in the corners of her mouth. She was curious if he still remembered how she likes her scotch.

Leon’s heart skipped a beat when she sat down in front of him, and he found himself admiring her figure. He also caught her grin, a pleasant feeling tingling in his chest. He remembered how this used to turn him on when she did that.

“Right,” he said, clearing his throat, returning the smirk. “How was I to remember that?” He asked her with a teasing tone as his eyes went from her lips, to her eyes, to her neck, and all the way down to her legs.

"I know for a fact you remember that. We used to be the greatest alcoholic couple to ever exist, after all," she stated, leaning on the counter. He couldn’t help but laugh at her response, nodding in agreement.

“Yeah…” he chuckled, leaning his weight on the counter as well, looking at her with his eyebrow raised.

“So… how’s the… uhm, date life been treating you?” He asked her, almost afraid of her response.

"Rough, just like I prefer it," she laughed it off, her eyes searching for the bartender. Leon felt a wave of jealousy hit him, and it made him feel a bit down. He had to remind himself to not let those feelings rule him again.

“And uh… you… seeing someone regularly?” He asked her, hoping that she wasn’t serious, but the way she was acting indicated otherwise. He ordered two scotches, and he turned back to her. He tried to hide the pain behind a smile, but it wasn’t easy.

"No, not exactly," she dodges the question skillfully. Well, what else did he expect? She’s not the one to reveal all the juicy details right away, especially now that he’s her ex-husband. Every thing about their interaction reminded him of that, and it made his heart ache in ways he never knew were possible before.

Leon’s soul tightened and he felt pain in it, anger brewing inside of him. He had to force himself to stay calm. It was hard with her sitting right in front of him. A million thoughts raced in his mind and he kept coming to the same conclusion. She’s probably sleeping with someone else. Leon’s jealousy was growing with each moment. And he thought that was a reason for her to dodge the question. And he still loved her and wanted her back but she probably didn’t feel the same.

Leon stayed silent for a while, and then suddenly felt like he can’t take it any longer.

“What’s with the dodging questions?” he snapped at her, “Did I do something, or are you just playing with me?”

At that exact moment, the bartender came back with the scotches, but Leon ignored them, just letting the silence sink in.

He really wanted to talk to her. The last few years had been hard and he knew that she would be someone he could lean on. And he wanted her. Desperately. He couldn’t hide it any longer.

"I’m not dodging the question," she arched her back, hand wrapping around the glass of scotch the second she touched it.

"I’m not dating anyone at the moment, if that’s what you’re asking about. But how is this any of your business anyway?"

She was so fucking cool about it and it was driving Leon nuts. How could she do this to him? What’s the matter with this banter? Has she become completely heartless after their split? She took a slow sip on her scotch, her eyes wandering all over the place, lingering on anything but him. And she was fucking right. Admitting it made Leon want to clench the poor glass in his hand so tight it could shatter any second. It wasn't any of his business anymore, indeed.

Leon sighed heavily, trying to contain his emotions, and he let out a breath.

“Don’t.. don’t do this,” he said in a pleading tone, his eyes looking at her, begging for her with hurt in his gaze.

“How could it not be my business? We were together, and… it feels… ” He fell silent for a few moments, trying to find the right words to say. He was trying to stay level-headed but it was very difficult.

"How’s work?" she interrupted him abruptly, tilting her head to gaze into his blushing face, prompting him to quickly put on a fake relaxed expression.

Leon’s heart was crushed. Her sudden shift in tone felt cruel and it made him feel like she didn’t care about him.

“Nothing much. Just the usual,” he replied after a moment of thought, trying to hide the fact that she did actually hurt him.

“Keeping the streets safe from terrorists, protecting cities all over the world…” he raised his eyebrows and then chuckled, “It can get pretty hectic at times.” He took a sip from his scotch in order to give himself a chance to compose himself. The thought sent a wave of aggravation through his chest. The tension was thick enough to cut with a knife.

“Same old Leon,” he added with a fake smile

"Really? Same old guy?" she smiled, looking at him with... some strange kind of affection. The kind of affection you give to people who aren’t in your life as much anymore. Who knows, maybe she actually missed him too.

“Yeah…” he replied, “Same old guy.” He took a deep breath to keep himself together, trying to be mature. But this was eating him up from the inside and he didn’t know what to do. The way she looked at him filled him with hope and a little bit of pain, and he felt a sense of relief for a moment before the realization that she didn’t mean it hit him.

He was stuck between wanting her back and wanting to hate her. He didn’t know which one to go for.

"I wouldn’t be so sure. Since you are the one seeing someone new, apparently," she nodded at the ring on his finger, a smirk appearing on her face yet again. She knew damn well it was their wedding ring, she would recognize it from the thousands of rings, even though it was a very plain piece of jewellery. But she wanted him to admit it to her face. She wanted to hear directrly from him that he still wears it.

"And it looks pretty serious. Are you married again? Does your new spouse know that you’re getting drunk with your ex-wife right now?" she chuckled and bit her lip, her eyes glowing with curiosity.

Leon felt his heart drop and his face turn red as she pointed out the ring. Of course she would notice that he hadn’t taken it off. He didn’t want to talk about it just yet, and he cleared his throat.

“This… um…” He looked away, unable to look her in the eyes. “This is…” he began, feeling ashamed and embarrassed. “It… it isn’t what you think… it’s…”

Finally, he gave up and looked back at her, his expression filled with sadness. “I… I got remarried.”

"Really?" she raised one eyebrows, giving him a tongue-in-cheek expression.

Yeah right. Remarried. Fucking bullshit.

"Congratulations! What is she like?" she continued with a vicious smirk. God, what a cruel woman she is. Her face was screaming "I've got you. Just admit that you're lying, don't humiliate yourself more".

Leon could see the relief in her face and his heart ached again. How can she act so nonchalant? Doesn’t she love him anymore?

“Um…” he felt himself tense up. He felt his stomach twisting and he didn’t want to tell her all of it. But he knew he didn’t want to lie to her either. She was his ex-wife, but he did still care and he did still feel some level of loyalty to her.

“She… we don’t…” he said, before sighing. “It’s complicated,” he left it at that.

"Complicated, really? Oh I’m so sorry to hear that," she squinted after taking another sip on her scotch, there was barely anything left in her glass now. Leon was terrible at lying. At this point it would be less embarrassing if he just admitted he still wears their ring right away.

Leon felt a wave of humiliation spread over him. Finally, he cleared his throat, and he let out another sigh. He couldn’t bring himself to look her in the eyes, so he spoke to the ground.

“Yeah…” he said softly, shaking his head, “…I still wear the ring…”

"Huh? So… there’s no new wife?" she tried her best to fake a confused frown, but the proud smirk and the obvious sarcasm in her tone destroyed her plan completely, leaving Leon flustered. She won. It was impossible to deceive her.

Leon’s face went pale. His lips trembled a little bit and his throat became dry.

He felt the anger building in him and he wanted so desperately to tell her how he felt. Or, even worse, go back and pretend that the truth was something else, and to lie again. He was stuck between those two options, and he felt so lost. He had never expected things to go this badly.

"You don’t need to answer that. I'm done torturing you, don’t worry," she gasped, looking away, tapping on the glass with her nail.

Leon closed his eyes and felt a wave of shame wash over him.

“Thank you,” he said after a moment of thought, looking back at her with a hint of a smile, and he meant it. “Not many people have the mercy to stop when it’s time,” he added, grateful for her.

"I learned not to get too carried away, I guess," she stated with a sigh, throwing her head back, her tired, weary eyes swirling the ceiling now.

"Why are you still wearing it though? For the sake of avoiding attention from younger girls?" she chuckled lazily and closed her eyes, making Leon notice the mascara fallouts under them.

Leon chuckled as well.

“Funny you should ask,” he began, with a small smile. “I’m still wearing it because it reminds me of the only time in my life when I was truly happy.”

He paused for a moment, and he felt himself get emotional. He swallowed hard as he tried to keep the tears from falling.

"You’re sweet," she whispered, turning her head back to meet his eyes with hers, her index finger playing with now empty scotch glass.

Leon stared at her and his heart skipped a beat when their gazes met.

“You’re still just as beautiful as you were back then,” he whispered.

“You were my everything,” Leon added, and the words felt strange to say. But it was the truth.

"...And you were mine," she admitted, a hint of pain crawling into her tone.

The hurt in her voice made his heart ache and he nodded as tears fell from his eyes.

“I’m sorry for what I did, … I know that it’s not worth much now, but I truly am,” he said with a slight whimper. “I’ve thought about calling you so many times…” he sighed and looked down, his shoulders slumping. “I should’ve fought for us…” Leon’s face contorted into a frown and he held his breath, “I didn’t realize just how much I missed you…”

She interrupts him with a kiss, a loud sound of their teeth hitting together messing a moment up a little, but she quickly recovers, wrapping one hand around the back of his neck and burrowing another into his hair, pulling him closer, suffocating him with her mouth hungrily, making him feel the taste of that same fucking lipstick, cigarettes and whiskey.

A million thoughts raced in Leon’s head as he felt the kiss. Every time she kissed him he felt a rush of affection and love, and he adored it. His mind went blank and he lost himself in the moment. He pulled her closer and put his hands on her waist, kissing her back. His passion for her, his love for her, had never gone away. It was still there, all the way to his core, and holding her tight like this felt so natural.

It was just like the old times.

She pulled away reluctantly, frantically gasping for air, letting out a chuckle when she notices him licking her saliva off his lips and wiping her lipgloss off his mouth and chin.

Fuck. What a damn turn on.

Leon’s heart skipped a beat once she stopped the kiss and he chuckled along with her.

“Don’t get me wrong, I love it, but we were in the middle of a conversation,” he laughed as he wiped his mouth.

“But you have a way of shutting me up…” He added, his face lighting up as they shared that moment. Leon smiled and pulled her close again.

“Damn…” he sighed as he caressed her face, brushing his fingers along her cheek and jaw, and his eyes glanced back and forth between her eyes and her lips. “You haven’t changed at all, and I’m definitely not complaining,” he added playfully, enjoying their physical closeness. “I really missed kissing you like that…”

"Do you want another reminder?..." she giggled, her hand finding its way to his hair again. He felt a wave of tingles go through his spine and his hairs stood up as her fingers ran through them. He liked it when she did that. Just like the good old days.

“Yes please,” he said with a grin. His heart was beating so fast as he looked into her eyes. “You know I can’t resist you,” he said playfully, before kissing her again.

She gently pushed her tongue into his mouth this time, carefully biting on his bottom lip as she smirked into the kiss, knowing damn well just how much that turns Leon on. She grabbed him by the collar eagerly, as the tips of their tongues met and wet noises of making out would definitely fill the bar if the music wasn’t as loud.

Leon felt his heart start racing in his chest, and he couldn’t help it. She could do anything she wanted to him and he would just allow it. He didn’t mind. He was powerless in her hands. His heart was beating faster with pure pleasure as the tips of their tongues met, and he moaned quietly into the kiss. He pulled away after what felt like an eternity and said,

“Wow… I… Damn…”

He was out of breath, but he didn’t care at all.

"Do you want to get out of here?.." She whispered immediately after breaking the kiss, wiping the lipstick off his face with her thumb again. He was such a mess right now.

Leon’s mind went blank.

How can she just say those words so casually? What is she thinking? Is she feeling the same thing as him? The same attachment he still feels for her? Is she just taking him for a ride and playing with him? The questions raced through his head. Before he could speak, or even think straight, he looked down at the ring on his hand. After a moment of silence, he finally spoke.

“Yes.”

She was genuinely surprised, not expecting him to agree right away just like that. She cleared her throat, as she recalled some very pleasant memories about their sex life, hot and painful arousal forming somewhere down her abdomen and she glanced at his hands again, coughing loudly when she pictured them touching her in all the most private places again. Leon’s heart skipped a beat when he saw the look in her eyes.

Was she thinking what he thought she was thinking?

He cleared his throat and chuckled nervously, a light turning red tinting his cheeks.

“Oh god, are you… Are you…?” He couldn’t believe he was asking her this. He felt like a teenage guy at this moment. But he had to know.

"Am I what? Turned on right now?" She chuckled, her pupils widening in anticipation, “You can’t even imagine how."

Leon started to sweat as he felt a wave of pleasure wash over him.

“Well… I can’t wait to see how then,” he answered, his cheeks flushing more. “Uh… Where would we go?” He asked, unsure of what to do next at this point.

"How drunk are you?" She asked, as the playful twinkle appeared in her eyes, her now darkened and swollen from kissing lips tempting him even harder.

“Not as drunk as I’d like to be,” he joked, his face still a little red from the last kiss. He leaned in and pressed his lips against hers once more. After a long moment, he pulled away again.

“But I’m definitely not sober either,” he admitted, “It’s kind of hard to be whenever you’re around.” He looked at her again, feeling overwhelmed by her beauty, the burning desire growing in his crotch. “I could just spend the rest of my life kissing you,” he sighed in pleasure.

"Woah, did someone turn into a romantic after we got divorced?" She placed a couple of wet kisses on his neck and jaw, clearly giving zero fucks about it being inappropriate both for public and for their age.

Leon laughed and gently pulled away. “Damn… You love playing with a man, don’t you?” He said teasingly, with a playful wink. He looked around at the bar and all of the people around them.

“I think we should probably go somewhere more private. As long as it doesn’t sound too boring to you, of course.”

"Well I remember that one time when you couldn’t wait to get somewhere private..." Her fingers grabbed his knee gently, it was obvious from her tone that she was hinting on that one time when they fucked in public a couple years ago, too impatient and too drunk to get home. The hint made Leon even harder and he pictured grabbing her pretty thighs, placing her right on that counter and fucking all the living shit out of her right then and there, for being so damn pretty, for seducing him so effortlessly, for not being his anymore.

Leon felt a wave of lust wash over him as she continued to speak.

She hasn’t forgotten, and she still wants him.

He cleared his throat and gulped hard, trying to hide the excitement in his voice but failing.

“Maybe we should… go to my hotel room,” he suggested enthusiastically. “If you’re okay with that,” he added.

"Oh, that would be nice.." she whispered, looking at him with her eyes wide open, the lustful thoughts in her head so loud and so obvious Leon could almost hear them. He felt himself getting a little bit more nervous when he noticed her expression.

He nodded. “Okay, let’s go,” he said, his heart racing in his chest. They both stood up, and Leon gave the bartender a few bills to cover their drinks and the tip.

God bless this fucking bar.

“Now let’s get out of here before we get too hot and bothered,” he chuckled.

She stood up too, grabbing her purse while hopping off the stool. She quickly closed the distance between them, grasping his hand tight, their fingers intertwining, causing Leon's heart to beat like crazy. Leon felt himself tingle throughout his entire body as their fingers touched, his heart speeding up dramatically.

Oh, god…

The second they walked out of the bar Leon pressed her body against the wall, pinning her, locking her hands above her head by grabbing her thin wrists, pushing his knee between her legs. He began to kiss her lips, neck — even her collarbone, as she kept chuckling and arching her back, soft sweet whimpers leaving her lips one after another.

"Woah, honey, have you missed me that much?" She teased, her eyes rolling back when his tongue trailed down the curve on her neck, leaving a path of saliva on it.

Leon felt a wave of pleasure wash over him as he pinned her to the wall. “Yeah... I have…” He said softly, “I’ve missed it all…”

"I’ve missed you too, Leon…" She wanted to bury her hands into his hair again, but he held them high above her head, preventing her from moving them. She then tilted her head, so that her lips were now really close to his neck. Without hesitation, she sank her teeth in, smiling as he gasped and loosened his grip on her wrists. She always bites hard and this time was no exception — she was practically chewing on his neck, leaving a deep almost bloody mark. She missed him so much it made her want to tear him apart, to bite a chunk out of him, to mark him everywhere. Leon hissed as she bit his neck and he leaned back, his heart racing.

“Damn… What did you do that for?” He asked softly, his words being caught by his teeth. He cleared his throat and chuckled nervously as he touched his neck. “You really like biting me, don’t you?” The mark she left made it clear.

"Just claiming you again.." She grinned, licking his taste off her lips, admiring the deep lovebite she left on him. Leon smirked. He’d missed those little inside jokes.

“I’m all yours…” He whispered as he leaned in again, placing a soft kiss on her lips. “I always have been. I never forgot the first time you marked me like that,” he added and he brought his hands to her waist.

She leans against the wall with her hand on his shoulder, her eyes gazing into his face with sadness. She blinks wearily and pulls him closer towards her, his hands gripping on her waist tighter.

"You were such a right person for me, Leon. You still are. I guess it’s just... the time wasn’t exactly right..." She admits, the sorrow in her tone so overwhelming and so gut-wrenching that Leon just wants to fall down to his knees and wrap his arms around her right on the street for everyone to see: anything to make her stay with him forever, to win her back.

Leon held her closer as she said those words. He sighed, looking into her eyes, and he felt a wave of intense feelings wash over him... A mixture of fear. Excitement. Joy. Sadness…

“But you still feel like home for me…”

"Maybe I am your home."

That sounds more like a statement than a question. A sad smile plays at the corners of her lips. She's right. She's fucking right again and it's killing him mercilessly. Her words left him feeling lost, confused and vulnerable. In a moment of weakness, he leaned in again, pressing his lips against hers and kissing her longer and deeper.

“I still want you just as bad,” he whispered.

"Fuck.." She managed to mumble something senseless with her eyes closed. Her arms — unpinned from the wall now, were resting around his neck, inviting him for another embrace. All of the feelings and emotions he hadn’t felt in years — he felt all of that again. Like a rush. And the most dangerous part was… that he enjoyed every second of it. He felt alive again. He pulled away and looked into her eyes with a sad smile. “I’d give anything to run away with you now.”

"There’s no need for that, honey. You’re not too drunk to ride your bike, are you?" She teased, brushing her nose against his neck, the smell of his cologne causing the hairs on her body to stay on end.

Leon laughed. “No, I can probably manage it still,” he looked down at the ground.

“It’s dangerous though… riding my bike out there, at night. Anything can happen.” He added.

Like getting stopped by the cops, getting attacked on the road… The thought of her safety still gave him a chill, even after all these years.

“But I want to do it. I’ll be careful. I promise,” he said, pulling her close to hold onto her one more time. He grabbed her hand and they walked out to his motorcycle together. Leon jumped on, waiting for her to get on too. Once he was sure she was seated comfortably behind him, he started the engine, revving it a few times. “Hold on tight!” He laughed, and then he took off with a loud sound. Her hands crawled under his arms to hold on his chest, head resting on his shoulder from behind. Leon smiled as he felt her body against his. He looked up at the stars and the city lights passing by. And for once, his troubles seemed to fade away. She was the only thing he felt. The only thing that felt real. He was truly happy for the first time in those two long years. A feeling he had missed terribly.

***

Leon places a kiss on her jaw, his hands gripping on her hips so hard she feels like she's going to faint. He grips like he's afraid to lose her again, like she's about to slip out of his arms the second the elevator stops. But she’s still there, pinned to the cold wall with the weight of his body (at this point he clearly has a thing for pressing her against something), moaning into his lips, pulling his hair — her every movement encouraging him to never stop.

“I won’t let you go this time, darling,” he whispers, his hands travelling from her hips to her upper body, stroking her ribs under the tight dress. He still felt a little unsure, a little nervous, but he wanted her. So badly.

“I’m not letting you go, ever again.”

“You’re stuck with me, for better… or for worse.” Another kiss on the neck, a purple hickey appearing quickly on her tender skin after he pulls his lips away, completely out of breath - so vulnerable and so needy, only for her.

"Oh, am I now?..." She looks up at him, getting on her tiptoes to reach his ear. Her voice wheezy and low when she whispers another inappropriate sweet nothing into it, nibbling on his earlobe, her hand slipping down his torso, causing goosebumps to appear all over his skin. She grabs on his crotch, letting out a genuinely surprised moan when she feels how hard he already is.

“You are,” he answered. He had never said those words to her before, not in this way at least. But he meant them with every fiber of his being. He kissed her again. Hard. Harder. With a level of desperation in his touch.

“I never stopped loving you… not once in the whole two damned years… I couldn’t stop… I wouldn’t stop…” he muttered, his voice breaking.

"Fuck, I seriously might pass out if you keep saying it like that..." she digs her fingers into his shoulder, gripping him tightly, trying to keep her balance. The elevator is finally on their floor, its doors opening automatically, playing a short silly melody. Leon smiles slyly, his hands diving down to her hips again. He easily lifts her up into his arms — so casually, that a small cry of surprise escapes her lips. She giggles, wrapping her arms tighter around his neck to prevent herself from falling, and he carries her out of the elevator, catching the attention of an older couple in the hallway, causing them to momentarily pause their conversation and cast a judgmental glance in the direction of the lovers. Leon kept her close, as he carried her inside the room. Her little giggle had only made him want her more. He was already feeling lightheaded due to her kisses, his heart racing a thousand miles per minute as he put the key in the door and turned it, pushing it open.

“Damn…” he whispered, a little breathless. “I’m going to need a cold shower after all that…” he chuckled. He closes the door with one hand, supporting her with the other, definitely not planning on letting her go even for a second. As he tries to close the door, he curses out loud, which makes her laugh again.

"Not a chance, hun. I’m not letting you go anywhere until we’re done," she whispered, chuckling when Leon slipped over something while trying so desperately to lock the room.

"Careful, I don’t want you falling and breaking my neck."

"Don't worry. I've got you." Leon's finally done with the damn door, so he throws the key on the first surface that caught his eye. He grabs her with both hands again, leaning in for another kiss. A couple of steady steps — and he's placing her on the hotel bed as gently as he possibly can, making sure she's comfortable. His jacket slips off and falls onto the bed when he crawls on top of her, their tongues swirling each other in their mouthes. He could feel his blood rushing to his cock. God. This felt so damn overwhelming. He reached for the hem of his shirt, ready to take it off after the jacket.

"Someone’s eager," she stated with a teasing grin after pulling away from the kiss, a trail of saliva stretching between the tips of their tongues. With her hands stroking his stomach under the shirt, she moves closer to him, feeling his muscles become tense under her gentle fingertips immediately. He straightens up, then pulls his shirt off with trembling hands. It allows her better access to the belt and she gets the hint, agile fingers reaching for the buckle as she kisses his stomach, pleased with the way his body reacts to the touch. He moans her name, gasping for air, pushing her towards him with a huff, fingers rubbing the soft hair on the back of her head. He needs her so bad it makes him look absolutely stupid and desperate.

"Fuck, darling, the things you do to me-" he lets out a breathless chuckle and bites his lip, the thumb of his free hand reaching for her chin to stroke it. He grabs it authoritatively, yet still gently, just enough effort to show her who’s in charge here (or so he thought). Another brief moment passes by and his finger finally reaches its destination — her lower lip, on which he puts pressure gently, causing her pretty mouth to open wide for him.

"Look at you. So hot for me."

"You have no room to talk. You’re hard as fuck, and I’m not even naked yet," she laughs, sticking her tongue out to swirl it around his thumb, piercing eyes watching his every movement carefully. She then accepts the finger deeper into her mouth, sucking on it, enjoying the sight of Leon throwing his head back with an audible moan, numerous sweat drops forming on his forehead.

“You’re irresistable. Maybe that’s why I always come crawling back to you…” Leon said quietly, finally taking the thumb out of her mouth, shivering at the pleasant feeling of wet slick tongue brushing it one last time.

“Flaterrer.”

Another sharp inhale, heavy eyelids covering her eyes when Leon bends his knees and climbs back onto the bed, his body above her, temples wet with sweat, his always neat hair sticking to them now. He grabs her wrist, politely putting her hand away from the belt, and kisses the crook of her neck, his tongue teasingly trailing down to her collarbone, luscious scent of her hair making him salivate.

“Stop being such a fucking tease!”

Her hips are grinding against his, her every move filled with excitement.

She really hasn’t changed at all… Leon thought to himself with a smile.

“Shh, just let me feel you like this for a moment… You’re not very patient, are you?” Leon asked, grinding back against her. His fingers trace a path down her back, moving in circular motions along her spine. The sensation causes her to arch her back and grip his shoulders tighter, his low, raspy voice intoxicating her.

“Respectfully, honey, we kinda haven’t had sex in two years,” she returns the teasing, planting a sloppy kiss on his jaw. Leon rolles his eyes with a short laugh, his fingers quickly finding the zipper of her dress. He gives her lower back a gentle tickle, trailing his short nails along its surface. When the dress is finally unzipped, a wave of indescribable arousal washes over Leon. He fights the urge to take his pants off, the pain from his cock getting too hard unable to fit in them anymore. But it can’t be done yet. He wants to tease her, to do everything right, to just remember her squirming impatiently under his touch like this forever. His hands trace the curves of her shoulders and he rushes to undress her eagerly, way too excited to see her naked chest. He knows it’s unlikely to see a bra there.

And he guesses it right.

The dress slips down her shoulders, revealing her breasts. Leon gulpes, sinking her appearance in, fighting the urge to bite into the soft flesh. He hesitates for a couple seconds, but eventually does just that, leaning in, putting her hair out of the way, gently brushing his still wet after her mouth thumb over the hard nipple.

“Still don’t know what a bra is, I suppose?” He sucks on the nipple gently, his teeth sinking into it with an extra level of carefulness, tasting her again and again, squeezing the tender breast passionately in his hand.

Oh how he wanted this. Oh just how many times had he touched himself, picturing her moaning under him like this again, all worked up and messy, begging him to fuck her brains out.

“Ah, so that’s what you’ve missed the most?” she teased, laughing at the ticklish feeling of his thumb playing with the sensitive nipple, watching his tongue swirl around it.

“What can I say... you have quite the tits,” Leon pulls away for a second, his lips parting with an audible sound.

“Please, shut up and save yourself the embarrassment,” she blushes instantly at his poor comment, pulling his hair with more strength now, “Don’t ruin the damn mood.”

“Still just as shy about it…” Leon whispered with a tiny smirk. “But I love the reaction,” he added, kissing her shoulder, finally releasing the wet sucked for a good minute breast. He continued stripping off her dress, starting to feel nervous again.

“I’m gonna slap you if you don’t stop being a smartmouth,” she threatened, her tone laced with half-hearted jest as she tapped his shoulder.

“Huh? I thought we’re saving the kinky stuff for later…” He finally pulls the dress off her with a wink, his knees beginning to tremble again at the sight of her sitting in front of him naked like this.

“Leon, I swear to god, if you don’t shut up-”

“Fine.”

He shoved his hands between her thighs with a laugh, fingers moving confidently to put her underwear to the side. He decides to gently wrap his hand around her throat, pushing his tongue into her open mouth, listening to every moan that escapes her lips. When his hand trailes down her neck to her collarbone, something metallic gets in the way. Leon pulls away with a confused expression, raising one eyebrow.

He notices a strange piece of jewelry under his fingers. He ignores it at first, but when he sees her face turning red, his gaze returns to the strange metal thing hanging around her neck.

And his heart sinks.

Dangling delicately from a silver chain, her wedding ring shimmered in the dull light of the hotel room.

"You... You kept it too?" he asked, holding the ring with a surprised face. "The whole time..?"

“Yeah, yeah, you’re not the only one heartbroken ex-spouse in this marriage, Leon, sorry I took your spotlight,” she chuckled, looking away, her embarrassment palpable in the air. “I just didn’t want to wear it on my finger after the divorce. You know me, I wouldn’t like people thinking I’m not over you, even if that’s obvious. And I kept it next to my heart like this anyway,” she adds with a sad chuckle, twisting the ring between her fingers.

Leon laughed softly.

"That's the saddest and the sweetest thing I've ever heard..." He replied, filled with empathy and emotion. He kisses her temple, thumb stroking her inner thigh gently, ready to strip the underwear off her. He wants to say something else, to break the silence with some reassuring speech, but the look in her eyes tells him to just keep going and save the conversation for later.

He gently pressed on her clothed clit with his thumb, gasping when he feels the soaked with her slick underwear under his touch.

“Please don’t torture me. Take ‘em off,” she murmurs, stroking his shoulder, her breath twitching at the sensation of her clit being stimulated.

He gets to work no questions asked, taking that piece of lingerie off her, his hands starting to shake with excitement againt. He notices the slick dripping down her thigh from her glistering entrance. Fuck. So wet for him already. What a pleasant view.

Once he was done with her underwear, his needy hands returned to her swollen clit, thumb circling around it with passion. It certainly was the best part of sleeping with Leon — no matter how desperate and turned on he is, no matter how much he wants to just sink his aching cock into her, he always has to make her cum first, using either his skilled hands or his tongue. And it seems like tonight he has chosen the first option.

He continued rubbing her clit with the thumb of his right hand, dragging the middle finger of his left hand through her aroused folds, warming her up, but not entering yet.

“May I?” he asked, inhaling, waiting for her permission. And when she nods, looking down at his hands with her lip bitten, the finger finally slips inside her, causing his whole body to melt and twitch, enjoying the sweet feeling of her tight, warm walls consuming it easily. She groans, then moans a breathy “Oh god” as her nails dig into his arm raggedly, responding to his touch. Leon can’t help a smirk. The way she was still so needy around him definitely did good things to his ego. Was she masturbating to the memories of their previous intercourses all these years too? She most definitely did. Judging by her reaction she was still just as desperate for him as he was for her.

He pushed the finger deeper, a weird sound escaping her lips when he bent it inside of her, trying to find the right angle. She squinted. Unlike Leon, she had a couple of hook-ups in those two years, but they weren’t serious nor were they frequent, so she wasn’t exactly used to being fingered by somebody else anymore. She tried to relax, arching her back with her eyes closed. She knew Leon will find the right spot eventually. He was good with his hands.

Leon nodded at the squint and changed the position of his finger slightly, trying to make her feel good again.

“Don’t worry, hun, I’ve got it, just give me a moment-” he pleaded, rubbing her clit with more pressure now, trying to distract her from the weird feeling, placing a soft comforting kiss on her shoulder.

“I-It’s okay,” she stuttered, opening her legs wider for him. “Just move your finger to the side a little- Oh fuck, yeah, just like that, yeah, right there-“ she moaned, a mixture of curse words escaping her lips again. Leon sighed with relief. He still hasn’t forgotten how to push her buttons. It felt good to know he still remembers how to please his lady in bed.

He begins to finger her carefully, trying to concentrate on her pleasure without losing his own composure. His movements were vigilant, yet still confident and the wet sounds of him pulling the finger in and out mixed with her breathy moans filled the hotel room, driving him completely crazy again.

“This okay?” he asks, speeding his movements up a little bit and watching her writhe in bed. Always so damn caring, stretching her with his finger like that, preparing her for his cock. She nods, whispering sweet innapropriate nothings into his ear, her nails digging into his arm deeper with every second, legs spread open, inviting him to add another finger in. And so he does just that, pushing his ring finger into her cunt, thumb of his other hand still circling her clit, his eyes glowing with intense lust he hadn’t felt in such a long time.

“Fuck, you can’t even imagine how much I needed that...” he purrs into her lips when she cups his cheek to pull him into another hot, steamy kiss, her tongue meeting his again.

“Damn, darling, you’re really trying to eat me alive today,” he adds with a devious chuckle, his fingers only picking up speed with no intention to stop until she cums on them.

“Leon, one more smart comment and I-“

But her brain is not working anymore, it’s too overwhelmed with his touch, with the way he dips his tongue into her collarbone, as her warm silk walls are wrapped tightly around his fingers.

“There, there...” he cooed softly, nuzzling his nose against her left breast. She throws her head back, trying to keep the hair out of her face, sweaty hands starting to wander all over his tense back now.

“Are you going to cum for me, darling?” Leon asks with a grin, a hopeful look in his eyes pushing her even closer to the climax. No one could ever compare with him. He proved it again skillfully, even after two years of so-called celibate (except for jerking off to fake scenarious where he fucks her at least once a day).

“L-Leon, I’m gonna-“ she tries to string a sentence together before dissolving into pleasure completely, but him sucking on her nipple again doesn’t help to concentrate on the words at all.

“I can feel you twitching, honey. C’mon. Do it for me. Cum on my fingers,” he pulls his mouth away from her breast, rubbing her clit with more intensity now, just like she always preffered it. He could feel her muscles spasm around his fingers and it made him want to please her only more, kissing every inch of her neck as she gets closer to her orgasm. “Do it for me, honey. I want to make you feel good. Don’t be shy, you can be as loud as you want...” he praised in between kisses, fingers moving as fast as they possibly can inside of her.

“Fuck, I..”

She falls down on the bed, writhing around, teeth clenched as her legs start to squirm, tangling the sheets into a complete mess. Her vision faded to black when she finally came with his name on her lips, her chest raising up and down as she collapsed on the bed with her back arched. Leon enjoys the view with a smug smirk at the corners of his mouth, completely enamored. Who would’ve thought that tonight’s visit to the bar could possilbly flow into fucking his ex-wife. But here she was — completely out of breath in the afterglow of her intense climax, legs tucked in and trembling, messy hair all over the pillow. He pulls his shaky covered in her slick fingers out and tilts his head to place a tender kiss on her knee.

“You okay, sweetheart?”

“You’re going to be the death of me,” she mumbles, covering her sweaty face with her palm, a chuckle escaping her swollen lips.

“What? You mean I’m not too rusty?” he caressed her leg, leaving a trail of slick from the same two fingers on her thigh.

“Oh shut up, Leon. You’re not that old…” she laughs, the ringing’s still in her ears.

Leon blushed at the sight of her. “I guess my body still can manage…” he added and kissed her thigh again, feeling uneasy with each passing second. He should’ve really taken the damn pants off. With a sigh, he felt his heart beating in his ears as he looked up at her.

“You’re beautiful.”

“And you’re handsome.”

They locked eyes, the intensity between them growing with each passing second. With a surge of anticipation, he closed the distance between them, edging closer on the bed. Their lips met again, the world fading away as he surrendered to the passionate embrace. Her hands reached his hair, pulling him closer, deepening the lustfull kiss.

“Fuck...” he groaned, trying to support his body on his trembling arms. “I… I don’t have any protection on me.”

“I’m still on the pill,” she whispers with a reassuring smile, putting her hair out of his mouth.

“Oh, um... S-Sure. Let me just take these off real quick...”

“I’ve got you,” she made him straighten up again by pushing his chest slightly, lips wandering all over his neck now, sucking on it again, ignoring his light-hearted grumbling about the hickeys. She manages to undo his belt after messing with it for a few seconds. Leon chuckled again. So damn adorable. She sighs when the leather strap finally slips through the loops, relinquishing its hold.

“Jesus, is it that hard?” he whispers with a giggle, gently squeezing her side, as she strips his pants and boxers off.

“Say that to your dick,” she scoffed, wrapping her hand around his width, thumb teasing the tip by sensually pressing on the leaking with precum slit. Leon panted, pushing her back on the bed, hands squeezing her waist as she lets out a breathless whimper. She moves her hand back and forth, feeling his cock getting warmed up again.

Fuck, he could literally cum just to seeing her like this — naked, spread open for him, pressed into the bed with his weight. Leon positioned himself between her thighs, pressing their foreheads together, the head of his cock dragged against her clit in a teasing manner.

“Easy on the stroking, sweetheart,” he purred, brushing his nose against her flushed cheek. “Don’t want this to end before it even starts, you know?”

A gasp of relief escapes his lips when her hand is finally removed from his cock. Okay, now he just needs to try his best fighting the intense urge to finish while entering her: a rather hard, almost impossible task to complete in his situation, but he somehow manages, lurching forward, his head slipping inside of her almost effortlessly as he supports the cock with his hand, hissing at the feeling of her tight, gentle walls wrapping around him.

“Fuck, you’re so-” He trembles, pushing himself deeper inside of her — nice and slow, partially to tease her, partially not to cum in two seconds. “You feel so goddamn good...”

She throws her head back into the pillow, nails gripping his shoulders ready to dig into their flesh at any second. She shivers when he finally pushes his whole length in, removing the hand supporting his cock somewhere above her head. It felt indescribably good and she just straddled him tighter, squeezing his arms in anticipation.

“Oh no, sweetheart,” he whispered with a chuckle, the first thrust catching her off guard completely, despite being steady and gentle. “I’m gonna need to ask you to remove those, okay?” he places his fingers over hers, gently coaxing her to loosen the grip around his arm. And once her hands fall back on the bed — he grabs her wrists with a smug smirk and pins them above her head. “We can’t have those pretty nails ruining my back tonight, can we?”

“Oh fuck you, Leon.”

“No, fuck you, actually. Oh, right. Guess what I’m doing just now?” he laughs again, placing a kiss over her smiling mouth. He thrusts again, his grip on her wrists firm, yet gentle, only to prevent her from scratching the shit out of his back. She moans back, clearly delighted. She actually enjoyed him taking control... occasionaly. They both knew she’s the one who holds power over him after all. He pulled his hips down harder, picking up speed after a couple of slow thrusts.

“Kiss me,” she demanded, arching her back for him, her ribs pressing against his now.

Leon couldn’t help but smile. He loved this side of her. The passionate side. The intimate side. Her demand made him feel so attractive, so handsome. So wanted.

He followed the request, kissing her deeply, his eyes rolling back behind his closed lids at the feeling of her cunt squeezing his cock so well, wet slapping sounds driving him crazy, making him whimper into her always ready for him mouth, which he was practically tongue-fucking now.

“I never want to stop kissing you,” he mumbled, pressing his lips against her hot temple, licking the sweat off it delicately. “Fuck, you’re driving me crazy, oh god…” he kept whispering, pounding into her body now, his thrusts so deep and so messy she could almost feel the tip of his cock touching her cervix, so she squints at the new sensation again, arching her hips to slightly change the angle of penetration. He completely forgets about the damage done to his shoulders by her nails and releases her wrists, grabbing the pillow instead, his moans now resonating just as loudly as hers.

“Fuck, I can’t get enough of you...” he muttered, as she pressed her lips against his, her fingernails destroying their favourite part of his body again now that her hands are free. She moaned louder with every intense thrust, making him forget about all the pain he had in his heart. So good. What a goddamn bliss. To feel her again, to touch her where no one else is allowed to. A thousand thoughts were rushing through his head now. His pace got extremely fast, the poor hotel bed creacking so hard like it was going to break under their bodies at any minute. He was about to say something, but then a tear spilled from his eye and fell onto her shoulder as the words caught in his throat. As the realization set in, he felt his heart drop to his knees but he was already too far gone.

“I love you,” he finally said in a small voice, feeling his heart shatter a little as he did so, but continuing to thrust, ignoring the pain from her nails sinking into his skin again.

“I love you too...” She mumbled with her eyes shut, closing the remaining distance between them for another kiss, her heart pounding within her chest as Leon kept pounding into her cunt, turning her into an absolutely desperate for his cock mess.

He couldn’t wait any longer. The way she arched into his touch, the way she was taking him whole so easily, the way she moaned his name, even the way she was scratching his abused back with those damn nails — every single one of these things pushed him to the edge, made him twitch and groan while he bites on her gentle shoulder. He wanted to claim her as his again, to never let go of her and bring back what belongs to him and him only. Everything about her made him want to propose to her again, right then and there while he fucks her into the matress.

Leon clenched the pillow in his fist, his eyes widening as he felt the painful sting of his sweat seeping into fresh scratch marks on his back. He called her by name, making direct eye contact, his heart jumping out of his chest.

That’s it. He has to say it. It’s now or never.

“Marry me again…”

He whispered, continuing his thrusts as tears ran down his cheeks. “Say yes…” he said with desperation in his voice. “Please, I don’t want to lose you again. I won’t survive it.”

The shock coursed through her veins, leaving her momentarily breathless and her eyes widened in disbelief.

“W-what?” she finally managed to respond, another thrust making her moan and melt completely under his touch again. Leon looked her in the eyes and the fear in her expression made him feel terrible.

“Please….” he begged, “Please, I can’t lose you again…” he whispered, feeling his heart shatter further. He didn’t know what to think, or how to react, but the desperate look in his eyes was a genuine one.

Her teary eyes were roaming all over him now, she was utterly astonished, the sudden proposal distracting her from the pleasant feeling of his pulsing cock inside of her. She tried her best to recover, cupping his cheeks with a nod, one genuine, full of excitement nod that made Leon tear up again.

“Fuck, I-… Yes! Yes! Of course I’ll fucking marry you again...” she assured him with a chuckle, leaning in for another long kiss and running her tongue over his lips. Leon breathed a sigh of relief, the fuzzy feeling only growing stronger when she kissed him again, his tears shifting from sadness to tears of joy.

“I won’t leave your side this time. I won’t ever leave you again. I promise.”

“That’s right. Don’t you fucking dare anymore.”

“Never again,” he promised with an emotional frown as he hugged her again, feeling her tight walls clench around his cock, his body pressing as close as it possibly can against hers. The moment ended up even better than he imagined and she was so beautiful it almost hurt. Or maybe it was just his completely fucked up back.

“I’m getting close...” he moaned at the sensation of her hot breath on his ear, hand kneeding her soft breast again. “Fuck, let me just...” he sobbed into the pillow, loosing himself completely while pounding into her pretty cunt. He pulled out with a groan, just the second before cumming all over her pretty thighs in warm spurts, also managing to somehow stain the sheets. He tries his best not to collapse on top of her, too afraid to crush her with his weight. His trembling arm couldn’t provide any support anymore and he puts all his effort into rolling over in bed next to her, weary head spinning after the intense orgasm.

“You okay?...” her voice turns him back to reality and he opens his eyes again, chuckling at the sight of her thighs covered in his thick, sticky cum.

“Yeah, I... Hold on, I just... It felt way too good and...” he sighed as she put a wet strand of hair out of his face with her shaky hand, admiring the way he looks in that exact second. “I’ll grab you a napkin. Just let me rest for a couple seconds, okay?”

Leon tried to sit up in bed. Still feeling a bit dizzy, he managed to prop himself up on his elbows and reached for the paper towel on the nightstand. She smiled when he started to wipe his cum off her legs, finally relaxing her muscles, still burning with desire for him as he cleans her up lovingly, giving her knee a pat when he’s done.

“Leon.”

“Yeah?” He raised his eyebrows, stroking her inner thigh genty.

“What on Earth what that proposal? Did you actually mean it?...”

He gulped loudly, releasing her leg, and blinked profusely at the sudden question. Well, what was he thinking? He had asked her to marry him while literally fucking her into the bed. Of course, she was going to have questions.

Without hesitation or second thoughts, Leon replied, "I meant every word. Of course I did," he said softly, moving closer to her again. He nuzzled into her chest, hooking a leg around her body, and she accepted the embrace, putting her arm around his shoulder and pulling him closer into the hug.

"Do you doubt me?" He whispered.

"No, not at all," she shook her head, still trying to catch her breath, her eyes wandering around the hotel room. Thoughts about people definitely hearing this loud ass bed and their moans making her smile again. She sighed and kissed his forehead, her hand slipping down his shoulder to caress his tense back, while the other reached for his hair to play with it. Leon sighed with relief and returned the kiss, placing it somewhere above her collarbone. The warmth of her body comforted him in every possible way.

“And yet, you still look so tense. Are you sure you’re okay?” he asks with a chuckle, a hint of fear crawling into his tone. What if she thinks it was a mistake? What if she was the one who didn’t mean it? What if she just agreed impulsively because of the arousal?

“Yes,” she reassures him with a sigh, pressing her lips against his forehead one more time.

 

“Just wondering how much paperwork we need to do to change my last name back to Kennedy…”

[scekrex]

It's me, yes it's me! I know you were all waiting for me! :DD

Yes, yes, it's an another crack fic, yippeecayay, mfers 🤠 Adam and reader arguing about something, might be something stupid or something serious, obviously they still love each other but both of them are insanely stubborn so neither wants to admit they are wrong. The reader goes to cool off, he meets up with a friend and start to just vent his frustration to them when lo and behold, Adam shows up to... Well "apologise" in his own unique way and it's basically him just seeing the location where reader is (They're sharing their locations, Adam's heart cannot handle anymore stress with reader going missing even if for a few minutes), showing up with his badass axe guitar and strumming it, going "I love you bitch... I ain't ever gon' stop loving you... Biiitch", reader's friend just looks at him with the biggest "Really? You actually LOVE him?" and reader just looks back at them with the goofiest grin: "We'll, he's dumb and overly stupid, but he's my dumb and overly stupid man" shrugging his shoulders and goes to Adam to kiss him, just to then smack him and then kiss him again 👀

Babes, I once again have to say that I love your crack prompts, at this point these r the air that keeps me alive bc holy fuck they make me laugh every fucking time.

Do you even

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language, fighting (not physically but verbally), slightly cracky

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

“Adam, just shut the fuck up for a second, would you?” you exclaimed harshly as you massaged your temples in order to try and keep calm.

He had been ranting about his bitchy band mate who had ditched him last minute before an important gig and you had enough of it. Ever since the both of you had woken up in the morning all Adam had been talking about was ‘how fucking done he is with that bastard’ and ‘how fucking dare that whore to ditch him last minute because he was the fucking Adam and the fucking Adam wasn't someone you'd ditch to fuck some random - and ugly, his words not yours - bbl bitch'. “Just shut the fuck up for a couple seconds okay? I get it, that fucker ditched ya, it was shitty of him, but for the love of God, stop acting like a motherfucking child and get the fuck over it.”

The brunette's hands were on his hips as he shot you a venomous look, “Well, if you would care you wouldn't mind me bitching about something that meant a whole fucking lot to me.” You couldn't help the huff that escaped you as you closed the gap between the both of you, your index finger aggressively tapping his chest as you looked up at him. Because what the actual fuck? You cared, you cared a lot and usually you didn't mind it when he was bitching about something, but you've had a headache all day and Adam wasn't being helpful with his constant talking. You couldn't even bring yourself to feel sorry for snapping at him, you had told him that you weren't feeling well today and yet he had strictly ignored that just for his own benefit. “You know what? Fuck you, Adam. You can suck my fucking dick for saying that. I fucking care, okay? Any ordinary bitch would've left you by now but I fucking didn't because I love you, for heaven's sake. So quit the motherfucking attitude already,” there was truly no way for you to swallow all the anger that was seething inside of you and you really couldn't care less. “I’m out of here, fucking call me when you decided to quit acting like a goddamn manchild,” and with that you grabbed your phones and keys and rushed out the apartment.

Once the door was shut you broke down entirely. Yes, you and Adam had different options on some things, nothing major though, but fighting like that? That was a thing that had never happened before, not when you started dating and especially not after you married him. Fighting with Adam felt exhausting, you hated how your heart hurt - it almost felt like physical pain. So you did the only logical thing and unlocked your phone to call your best friend.

Arlo was someone you could always count on and that was proven one more time when the man had pulled up to the park in no time - that's where you had asked him to meet you - and he came in company of milkshakes. He handed you the cup as he sat down on the bench next to you. “So, you finally figured out that Adam is a huge bitch huh?” that earned Arlo a glare. Yes, you were mad at your husband, but that was no reason to insult the man you loved so dearly. “Quit it, I'm not breaking up with him because of one single fight,” you mumbled as you took a sip of your milkshake, realizing Arlo had managed to get you your favorite flavor. That brightened the mood at least a little. “Look Y/N, I'm all for love ‘n’ shit, but Adam, seriously? I mean you of all people should know how big his ego is and he just proved this by ignoring your well-being,” the blonde continued to rant about your husband and while Adam's ego was huge, his love for you was bigger.

He didn't let outsiders notice the ways he looked at you during gigs, he made it seem casual when his wing wrapped around your shoulder when you two walked through the streets like it was a thing people casually did - they didn't. Touching the wings of another angel, let alone use your wings to shield someone was a big deal due to the wings being hypersensitive. He always remembered what you liked and what you disliked, no matter what you were talking about. He knew and respected a lot of things when it came to you, things he didn't even tolerate when it came to others. He loved you and while for strangers eyes it wasn't visible, it was everything to you.

“Arlo, I didn't fucking call you so that you can tell me what a shitty husband I have, he loves me and I love him, he cares and just because we had one fight in six thousand years won't make me throw this relationship away so you either shut it or you leave, that's up to you,” you snapped at the blonde angel next to you and it seemed to do the job because Arlo closed his lips around the straw of his own milkshake and seemingly swallowed all the hatred he hold for Adam. You knew Arlo was trying to cheer you up, but he was doing a shitty job at that. Down talking your husband wasn't something you would let slide wordlessly. Because when Adam wanted, he was very much able and willing to serve you the world on a golden platter. He had risked a lot for you already and you were aware he would do it all again.

-

In the meantime Adam was still at your apartment. The second you had slammed the door shut behind you he realized how badly he had fucked up. There had always been different options on certain things, that was fine though. Usually you guys were able to talk it out and find a solution that made both of you happy, you never had a fucking fight in over six thousand years and now the fight had been intense enough to result in you leaving.

He had fucked up badly and he knew it.

But he couldn't just wait for you to come back. In the name of the almighty lord above, Adam wasn't even sure if you'd come home for the night. What if you were to stay with a friend until tomorrow, maybe even longer? No, he needed to solve this now. So he did the first thing that came to his mind and checked your location.

When you two had just started dating he had been losing you a lot, mainly because whenever you saw something that you liked or that you thought he might like you were running off to get that thing. So the two of you had agreed to constantly share your location with each other and ever since then that had never changed, these days it was a simple habit. The little icon on the map was pinned on the park. Good, that wasn't too far.

So the man grabbed his guitar and left to apologize.

-

Arlo’s eyes scanned the park for a moment, then he groaned quietly, “Speaking of the devil.” You turned your head to look over to where your blonde homie was looking at and couldn't help but roll your eyes.

Adam was walking straight towards you.

He had his guitar in his hand as he confidently walked across the park just to stop in front of the bench you and Arlo were sitting on. You weren't the only one annoyed by Adam's presence, the blonde angel next to you was just as pleased to see the leader of the exorcists as you were and he let Adam feel that they didn't want him there. “The fuck you think you're doing?” Arlo hissed at the brunette who was simply ignoring that they were even there. He sighed as you looked at you, something in his mimic told you he was sorry but you weren't able to see the guilt in his eyes due to his stupid mask. Fuck, he really couldn't leave that thing at home for just one day, could he?

Adam adjusted the guitar in his hands, made sure his fingers were placed on the right strings and then he started to play a kinda shitty sounding tune - knowing Adam it was shitty on purpose, there was no way he'd accidentally play bad. “I love you, bitch,” he spoke the words more than he sang them but it definitely made your lips twitch up in a grin. Arlo shot you a critical look, they were having none of it. “I ain't ever gon’ stop loving you,” there was a pause, then he finished, “Bitch.”

And that made you full on chuckle, the glimpse of hope that was suddenly visible through Adam's expression showed you that he knew he had fucked up, that he was sorry. And maybe he would apologize properly once the two of you were back at your apartment. “You’re not gonna simply forgive him with that sad excuse of an apology, right?” Arlo asked in shock as you got up and took a step forward to be able to wrap your arms around the first man's waist. “You ain't ever gonna stop loving me, huh?” you asked teasingly as your finger poked him in his side which made him flinch a little. “Dude, Y/N, he fucking overstepped boundaries and you just gonna forget and forgive because he pulled out his shitty guitar and played two chords?” Arlo complained and stepped up to the both of you, they seemed genuinely furious about it. “The fuck’s your problem man, this ain't your fight, this is our thing to deal with,” the brunette growled at them but they didn't care. To be honest, they never cared about anything Adam said or did to them, no matter if it was something positive or negative. “You’re seriously telling me you love that guy?”

You weren't giving Arlo the satisfaction of attention, instead you pulled Adam's mask up so that the LED face was resting on top of his head and the horns of it were near his neck. “I want a proper apology once we get home, if I don't get that, I'll find some other place to crash at for the night, am I clear?” you explained how it would go, all the playfulness was gone, there wasn't a smirk on your lips anymore and your eyes told Adam that you were serious about it, “And then I'd like to talk it out so that we can find a solution in case that shit should ever happen again.” The leader of the exorcists was quick to nod, followed by a loud and clear, “Yes, sir.” And for the moment that was enough. Enough to lean in and kiss him. Adam melted against your lips immediately, a small moan managed to slip past his lips. But the kiss ended as abrupt as it had started and Adam felt your hand on the back of his head, the mask caught most of the hit but he still felt it, “You fucking idiot.” That made said idiot grin one of his stupidly cocky grins, “Maybe, but at least I'm your idiot.” This time it was him who started the kiss, his wing quickly came up to block the view for Arlo, who was watching the two of you a little too intensive for Adam's liking.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x male reader #male reader #adam x y/n #adam x reader #adam x you

[thecuriousquest]

May I request a SFW yandere!sanemi x Fem!reader?

I would like yandere sanemi to be kinda soft and not to cruel. Sanemi kidnaps her cause she broke a leg during a mission and he wants her to just stay at his estate forever. Sanemi takes care of her and wraps her leg in new bandages each day, yet, the reader still is upset with him.

I would like some angst to fluff if that’s okay!

You can change up the scenario but I was hoping it could be something like the reader starts to yell at him for kidnapping her and he gets upset. So sanemi screams at her, calling her weak. She starts to cry and sanemi gets soft ;>

Nemi apologizes and feels guilty… then we get hugs from him and care :3

Hope this interests you! Take your time if you would like to write this. Thank you.

This Little Love of Mine

Yan!Sanemi Shinazugawa x Fem!Reader

Note: Sorry this took so long to get to. I finally did it, though! I love the ask. Thank you for the prompt. Hope you have a good one!

TW: Yandere themes, SFW, kidnapping, broken leg, unwilling-ish reader

Side Note: In this, you are a Hashira, and your title is the Ice Pillar.

Master List

—————————————————————————

You sit there on Sanemi’s bed as he wraps up your broken leg. You watch him work slowly, meticulously. It’s as if he’s savoring his time with you right now, as if he loves caring for you. Times like this is where his softer side comes out. You don’t see the hardened Wind Pillar that cuts the heads off of demons. Here, you just see Sanemi Shinazugawa as a kind man, a gentle man…yet still a man who won’t let you go.

It’s only been three weeks since you broke your leg, but still, every time you mention going back to your estate, a certain look passes over Sanemi’s face. It’s like a flash of tension causing him to thin his lips in a grimace and furrow his eyebrows in anger. It washes away instantly, but you still catch a glimpse of it. And then silence, and then more silence. You ask him again, still no reply until he finishes wrapping up your leg.

This time, you’re not going to let him get away with acting like this simply because you want to avoid confrontation or whatever might come along with *that* look he gives you when you bring up leaving.

“Sanemi, we have to talk about this. Please, can’t we be adults and discuss what happens once I’m healed?”

The Wind Hashira looks up at you once he finishes bandaging your leg. “This again?”

“Yes, because you never want to talk about it. I want to talk about going back to my estate.”

“No, you’re not leaving. I told you that in the beginning when I brought you here. You’re safer here under my protection. No more missions either. I’ll take care of you. I’ll provide for you. I’ll protect you. You don’t need to be on your own…you clearly can’t do it.”

“The hell, Sanemi? What’s that supposed to mean?”

And there it is…that look…tight lips, furrowed brows, narrowed eyes.

“You know exactly what I mean. You’re just incapable of taking care of yourself. You’re too impulsive. Look at you! Your leg is broken!”

“Things happen! I’ll deal with it!”

“No, you won’t because you’re so goddamn weak!”

He instantly regrets those words as they leave his mouth. Tears bud in your eyes, overflowing and spilling down your cheeks in salty rivers. Your lower lip quivers a bit, now damp and glossy.

“Y/N…”

You look down at your leg, your vision blurred by your tears. Is he right? Are you really so weak that you can’t protect yourself? You’re the Ice Pillar, yet you fold so easily at confrontation, breaking down when the one person you’re closest to calls you “weak”.

“Hey…Y/N…you…I didn’t mean it. Okay? I apologize. But…I can’t let you go. I won’t let you go. No matter how strong you think you are, I won’t risk losing someone I love in this fucked up world. Cruelty swarms this earth like a plague, and I won’t have you taken from me.”

He moves on the bed next to you, pulling you in close and letting you lean against his side. “You can’t leave…you can’t leave me. I’d die without you. Don’t you understand? Everything about you is the reason why I can get up in the morning. You’re the woman I want to be with for the rest of my life.”

“Sanemi…” You can’t help but rest your cheek on his shoulder as you cry. “Please, we can talk about this. Can’t we? I can still be with you and go on missions. I’m a Hashira too!”

“It’s not practical…I’m sorry. I’m sorry you feel like this, but I know what’s best for you.”

It drains you. Everything drains you. You feel like he’s not listening, or maybe he just chooses not to hear you. You don’t know which one it is, but you feel exhausted either way. However, Sanemi does stay with you through it all, through your tears, through your pain at relinquishing your control over your life, through the heartache that comes will leaving your post as the Ice Pillar. He does it because he loves you. He will always love you. Despite the rapid changes going on in your life right now, you know his love will always be a constant.

#yandere #triggering content #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere x y/n #triggering themes #yandere x darling #yandere themes #demon slayer #yandere demon slayer #yandere sanemi shinazugawa #yandere sanemi #sanemi shinazugawa #kny sanemi #demon slayer sanemi

[leonsfiancee]

stress-free. - leon s. kennedy.

summary: you give leon a back massage while he talks to you.

tw: fluff, slight angst, some sadness, scars, swearing, etc.

leon kennedy x female reader

•••

Leon had his eyes closed as you gently rubbed his tense muscles, the warm air blowing through the room in a relaxing fashion. The TV was playing, but Leon was hardly listening to the movie that was playing, your massages working wonders on his aching muscles. He would let out a groan or two every once in a while, the sound music to your ears as you worked your fingers against his bare back.

"You okay?" you quietly asked, running your fingers against his back and tracing the outlines of his many scars. He opened his eyes and looked at the wall across from him, his hands were folded together on his lap. He sighed softly.

"Yeah," he replied. "Just… thinking, I guess." You frowned at his response, and leaned down to press a kiss on his neck. “You can talk to me if you want to, y'know?"

Leon hummed. "I know," he responded. "I just...don't know where to start."

You paused in your movements, your hands stilling against his back. You were silent, allowing him to think and collect his thoughts, you were interested in what was going on in his mind.

"I watch people die all the time," Leon suddenly stated. "People I have no idea who they are, people I have no connection with. And when it happens, I can’t help but feel horrible."

You were quiet.

"I think about their families, their friends, the people who care about them. And how their lives were cut short. How they had so much potential. And they're not here anymore. It's...a lot. All of the death, the loss. Ever since Raccoon City, I’ve been surrounded by it. Death. It's just a part of my everyday life. I hate it."

"It's hard," you whispered, knowing exactly what he was going through. You both were in the same position, having been there for each other during your darkest times. “And I understand it's not something you can easily get over. It never is."

"Yeah," he murmured, turning his head and resting his chin against his hand. He had a tired look in his eyes, his lips were turned down into a frown. “I’ve lost so many people, you…you don’t understand. How do you move on after you've seen people being eaten by zombies? How can you continue your life when you've seen someone being blown up to bits right in front of you? When you've had to fight to survive against a goddamn tyrant that has no fucking limit and just keeps coming..”

You bit your lip. "I can’t imagine, Leon..”

Leon was silent. "I just...don't feel like I deserve this. Any of this. The people who died didn't get to live their life to the fullest. And yet, here I am, alive and living my life. When I shouldn't even be alive."

"That's not true, Leon," you whispered, pressing another kiss against his neck. “You are very important to me.”

He swallowed. "Sometimes, I wish that it would have been me who died instead of the others," he said. "The world would have been a better place if that was the case.”

“Leon. Stop.” I say sternly, my hands going around his body to rest against his chest. I lean against him, holding him close.

He sighed and turned his head away from me, looking off to the side. His gaze was clouded and far away. He was lost in thought, his mind probably going a mile a minute. You were silent, waiting patiently for him to speak.

"Is this..," Leon began, pausing for a moment. He licked his lips, hesitating. "Is this my life now? Do I just keep going through life, pretending everything is fine when it's not?"

"What do you mean?" you asked.

"Am I just gonna have to keep watching people die? Keep living this nightmare that never seems to end? Is it always going to be like this?" Leon questioned. "Is this what the rest of my life is going to be?"

“I..I don’t know, Leon..”

He sighed, looking down. His expression was unreadable, but you could see the sadness in his eyes. You felt your heart break at his expression. You didn't know what to say to him, or what you could say to him. “I’m sorry you have to go through so much, Leon. It’s crazy and terrifying..I’m really sorry..and I wish I could help you..”

He glanced at you, before closing his eyes. There was a long silence between you two. You rested your chin against his shoulder, feeling his breathing calm down. After a few moments, he broke the silence.

"I love you," he murmured. "I really do."

"I love you, too, Leon," you whispered.

His mouth twitched slightly.

"Can you promise me something?" he asked, opening his eyes and staring ahead at the TV.

"Of course," you responded, moving your arms from around him. "Anything."

"Promise me that no matter what happens, you won't leave my side," he requested, glancing at you. "No matter how fucked up things are. Please."

"Leon," you said softly, cupping his face and pressing your lips against his forehead. He leaned into your touch, placing his hand over yours. “You know I would never leave you. I love you. No matter what. I promise."

He nodded, closing his eyes again. "Okay," he whispered, his voice breaking.

You held him tightly, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "You’re going to be alright, Leon," you whispered.

He swallowed, looking at you. You gave him a reassuring smile, hoping to convey how much you loved him and how much you cared. “Thanks for listening…I feel like you’re the only one who really understands me..and the only person who can help me out of this hole. I really do appreciate it."

"I'll always be here for you," you said, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and hugging him tightly.

•••

a/n: it’s okay..

#fanfic #fanfiction #leon kennedy #leon kennedy fanfic #maturecontent #resident evil leon #leonkennedy #leon s kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #leon scott kennedy #re4 leon #leonscottkennedy #fandom #re fandom

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

A Place To Call Home: After Shocks

Summary: The reader is feeling guilty after doubting her parents after the stunt her birth parents pulled. But with her parents going away to film a new project soon, the only solution may be for her to go with them for some much needed bonding...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x foster daughter!reader

Word Count: 11,100ish

Warnings: language, angst, fluff

A/N: This one takes place directly after Long, Long Time!

________

“Y/N.” You felt TJ behind you, his strong arms wrapping around your waist, holding you close. “What do you need right now?”

You smiled to yourself, closing your eyes. For every bad thing that’d happened in your life, you were still amazed at how lucky you were to have found someone that loved you wholly. He was still the one person that you’d never once doubted cared for you, never struggled with sharing the dark parts of your past. 

There were things you’d only told him even, the details behind vague statements to your parents. Yet he stayed and never complained about what being with a person with scars was like. It’d be so much easier for him to have found a normal girl, so much less for him to worry about.

“I probably would have wound up with a not so nice guy if I’d not gone to my parents when I was a teenager. I would have fallen for the first guy that was nice and sweet just so he could get me in bed or worse. I was so fucking starved for attention and love back then. I was so goddamn lonely.”

He squeezed you tighter, tucking his head down so he could burrow his face in your neck, kissing it softly.

“My dad showed me what to look for in a man. My mom too. They taught me how I was supposed to be treated when I was in a relationship.” You opened your eyes, staring out the back window again. “How did I let those assholes make me afraid of my parents? I hate that I pushed them away, TJ. It’s better now but it’s not. I feel so guilty.”

“It’s only been a few days since things got back to normal. Give it some time. Try therapy with them, bring ‘em to a session.”

“Honey, I know exactly what the therapist would say. I had this same conversation when I was in college. I know it’s because I want people to be angry at me when I make a mistake. It’s what I expect. It’s what my childhood taught me, my time in foster care did.”

“Alright,” he said, kissing the side of my head. “So how’d they say to not feel guilty back then?”

“They suggested I spend time with them so I could understand that my guilt had no basis. That they loved me no matter what and that’s what the whole unconditional thing meant. It’s not bad to get afraid. It’s human and we shouldn’t be ashamed of being afraid.”

“So go spend some time with your parents,” he said.

“I spend too much time with them already,” you said, squeezing your eyes shut as he spun you around in his hold. “Other people our age-”

“I don’t give a fuck about other people our age. Our family lives around the corner and frankly, I hope they always do. I love them. I enjoy their company. Honey, I can promise you that having a close, loving family is a good thing. Allie and Colin? They fucking adore their grandparents. They regularly get to see their aunts and uncle. We have amazing family friends they get to grow up with. Those two kids are never, ever, going to doubt they they are loved and supported. You and I could die tomorrow and I know those two will turn out amazing. I promise you, we will never spend too much time with our family.”

“I worry you think I’m too needy sometimes,” you whispered, meeting his gaze. His face was gentle, short black hair still damp from his shower. “But I’ve never doubted you. I just don’t want to put too much on you. I don’t want to take away time that should be yours.”

“Oh you sweet, silly, adorable, idiot,” he chuckled, tucking your hair behind your ear, letting his finger trail down the side of your throat. “We have forever together. I know how lucky I am to spend as much time as I do with you. My job is flexible and only getting more with time. And you? You’re turning set design into a career now. What couple our age gets to spend so much of our time together? Believe me, I’m greedy to be with you as much as I can be but I am more than happy to share you with our family.”

He cupped your cheek, smiling while he gently stroked over your cheekbone. “Give spending some extra time with them a shot for me. Okay, silly goose?”

“Where did I find you?” you whispered, nuzzling into his chest.

“Orientation. I was the boy awkwardly staring at you for so long you asked if I had heatstroke.” You laughed at the memory of him just blank faced, sweating in the boiling summer heat as you stood with your orientation packet and attempted to find your parents in the crowd. You thought he was from out of state with the way he was dripping and offered him some water while finding him some shade to hide beneath. 

By the time he’d gotten his words back, you’d realized he was there on his own. No family to help him move in, find buildings, buy books. It wasn’t a conscious thought back then but you knew that ache of loneliness. Even people who came from homes with parents could feel like they were by themselves. 

“Lucky for me you took pity on me and instead of thinking I was a creeper, you showed me which line to get my packet from and pointed out where buildings were on maps and all of it. I was in love with you before I even knew your name.”

“Thomas,” you said, cheeks flushing. “Don’t be cute when I was feeling crappy five minutes ago.”

“Ah, but that’s my favorite thing to do,” he teased, kissing the tip of your nose. “Now off you go.”

“To where?” you laughed, TJ walking you over to the front door. 

“To your parents, silly. It’s only nine and we both know they don’t sleep until late. Go hang for a bit, talk to them about being together more. Me and my perky butt will be waiting here for you when you get back.”

“Okay, well that’s just cruel to put that image in my mind and then send me away,” you said as he bent down and slipped a pair of sneakers on your feet. He looked up through his lashes, putting on a sultry smile. “TJ! Stop turning me on!”

“Don’t blame me for you being stunning,” he said, rising to his feet and pecking a kiss to your lips. “Drive over for me.”

“Okay,” you said. “What are you planning on doing in the meantime?”

“Check on the munchkins, play a video game, lay in bed in my birthday suit to greet you when you get back.”

“Just don’t scar the children for life,” you laughed, feeling a gentle pat on your ass. TJ ushered you to go when you nearly dragged him towards the bedroom and finally you were out the door. Two minutes later, you were walking into your parents house, the place pretty dark. JJ was at a graduation party and spending the night there. The twins were up in the family room watching an old movie with the lights off, totally engrossed with it. You figured your parents were on their private balcony and headed for their room.

“Oh fuck!” you shouted when you saw way more of your father than you ever wanted to. You quickly slammed the door and stood outside the room, pacing away as you shook your head. “Nope. Nope. Nope. I didn’t see that. I did not see that.”

The door opened after a moment, your mom slipping out in a pair of joggers and a silky black pajama shirt.

“I am so sorry, honey. I thought dad locked the door,” she said as you kept walking, shaking your head. “Are you okay?”

“Was he giving you a fucking naked lap dance?” you said, a coy smile on her face as she shrugged. “Mom!”

“Oh, you’ve seen his ass before when you watched The Boys,” she said.

“I knew that was going to happen! And I saw a whole lot more than just ass,” you said, shivering your whole body as the twins came down from their movie.

“I remember when I walked in on them,” said your brother, wearing a shit eating grin as you groaned. “Dad’s got a huge-”

“I don’t need a reminder!” you said, your dad clearing his throat as he came out in a pair of sweatpants and gray t-shirt. 

“Things going okay out here?” he asked, forcing a smile.

“Talking about your apparently huge dick,” said Arrow. Your mom couldn’t help but laugh as your dad groaned, the twins starting to giggle. “What? It’s the truth.”

“While I normally appreciate how open we are as a family, I mean this in the nicest way, we are never bringing this topic up again,” said your dad with a sigh. “Go finish your movie and for the love of god never talk about this again.”

Your mom was still laughing, earning a small headlock from him. “It’s your fault you didn’t lock the door!”

“Yes, I know,” he groaned, letting her go and standing in front of you with an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry for scaring you for life, kiddo.”

“It’s fine,” you sighed, crossing your arms. “In terms of traumatizing events, this ranks pretty low for me. Besides, mom told me when I started having sex with TJ about your sex life.”

His head whipped around and she held up her hands. “Hey. She had questions and I answered them.”

“I wouldn’t have told her how big…you know,” he grumbled. 

“I didn’t. I just said above average is nice!”

“As much fun as this conversation is, I’d like to repress this memory if possible so I’m going to let you guys continue with your magic mike moment-”

You heard the twins howl in laughter, your dad storming past you and over towards the stairs.

“You two start high school in the fall and guess what talk we’re having tomorrow?” he said. They both groaned for a moment before you heard noise again, your dad wiping his hand over his face. 

“They both know what sex is,” you said, his eyes wide. “I gave them both the talk like years ago.”

“You did?” they both asked.

“Yeah. I gave it to all of them. It’s a lot easier for big sis to tell you than mom and dad, especially when dad makes talking about sex so freaking awkward,” you said, cocking your head.

“Well, thank you,” he said, nodding once. “And if that’s something you want to discuss, then we can.”

“I’m good. I just enjoy torturing you in return for the trauma I endured tonight,” you said with a smile. Your mom giggled as he pushed you both into the bedroom, closing the door behind himself.

“Well the mood is gone so what’s up?” he asked as you sat very specifically not on the bed and wandered over to the large window out back. You spun on your heels, both of them watching with concerned eyes.

“I…have been feeling guilty about doubting you guys that you’d hurt me like the sperm and egg donor did and…I’d like to try that thing we did when I was younger and spending more time with you guys helped…if that’s cool,” you said, biting your bottom lip. 

“Honey, of course you can hang out with us more often,” said your mom. She wrapped you up in a hug, letting you melt into her. “Dad and I were talking earlier and hoping we could steal some time with you. We missed you.”

“I missed you guys too,” you said, feeling your dad come up behind you and hug you, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“You don’t have anything to feel guilty about,” he whispered, kissing the top of your head. 

“I know I shouldn’t but I know I hurt you both and that’s something I have to deal with.”

“It hurts more knowing how much you hurt yourself for being human, kiddo,” he said.

“I know how scared you were that I’d stop-“

“You didn’t stop loving us,” he said. “You were afraid and sometimes, your kids get scared. It’s that simple.”

You nodded, enjoying being squished between them, a calm feeling settling in your bones. 

“There she is,” he murmured as he felt you relax. “Better?”

“Yeah,” you said. Your mom tugged you over to the bed, your eyebrows raising.

“It’s clean, I promise.” She slid into her side of the bed, tugging you down in the middle as your dad moved in on your other side. “So we could watch a movie, play a game-“

“Guys,” you said. “It’s okay. You had other plans-“

“And now our plans are to spend time with you,” said your dad, throwing his arm over your shoulders, tucking you into his side. You glanced up, frowning at the deep worry in his eyes. “Honey, you never have to ask us to be with you like you’re some kind of bother. Please know that.”

“You know me,” you said, your mom scooting closer, taking one of your hands in hers. “Can I maybe, I know how this is going to sound-“

“Y/N. Ask like we’re your mom and dad, not strangers,” said your mom. 

“I know that too. I’m a little shaky I guess,” you breathed out, both of them holding your closer. “Can we spend more time together, like one on one? Like make a night or something for us like we did when I was younger? That really helped me back then and TJ thinks it’ll help now too.”

“Knew there was a reason I loved that boy,” said your mom. “Of course we can do that.”

You felt your dad stiffen though, your head turning up. He looked sad, pouting almost. 

“You have to go away for a project soon, don’t you,” you said quietly. 

“Oh no,” said your mom, her hand leaving yours, both of them covering her mouth. “We both have to for two weeks starting on Tuesday. Daddy’s gone for over a month.”

“JJ was going to be in charge and we were going to come home on the weekends but-“

“You have work. I understand.” Still, tears prickled in the corner of your eyes. Why’d you have to be so stupid and push them away for the past month? Now they were both going to be gone.

“Come with us.” Your dad turned your cheek to face him, wiping away a stray droplet before it could fall. “We need to be together again for a little bit. Come to the project with us for two weeks and then you can decide to stay with me or go home with mom but either way you got at least one of us.”

“That’s a long time to be away from Allie and Colin,” you said, biting your bottom lip. “But I know TJ can handle it. I need to talk to him first. I can’t make that kind of decision on my own.”

“We understand. Trust me. Dad and I have had a lot of those conversations over the years.” You already knew TJ would tell you to go and have fun. But you’d never spent more than a few days away from the kids. 

“The little one’s will survive. Give ‘em a call and facetime them everyday and it helps. Believe me, nothing beats a hug from them when you’ve been gone for a few weeks,” said your dad. “They’ve dealt with TJ being gone for a week for work before. They’ll be alright if you choose to go.”

“I know they would. It’s me I don’t know about,” you said, closing your eyes. “Let me talk to TJ and I’ll give you guys an answer in the morning.”

“Whatever you want to do. We can always hang out when we get back too,” he said, kissing your temple. “So can I interest you ladies in a game of Mario Kart?”

Three days later you were walking into an upscale cabin you were sharing with your parents, most of the other cabins at the unique little hotel filled with cast and crew for the movie your parents were making. They were producing it and your dad was starring as the main character. You’d done the set design on it nearly a year prior and while you’d forgotten most of the story, you were excited to see one of your sets in person. Plus you hadn’t seen your dad on a film set in more than a few years and knew seeing him act in person was a rare treat.

After you ditched your bags in the spare bedroom, you changed and met up with your parents for a pre-shoot dinner they were hosting at a restaurant in town with the cast and some of the higher ups. While the dinner was fun, you were tired from traveling all the way to Vancouver all day. You ducked outside to give TJ a quick call but were reluctant to go back inside and have to be social again when you were exhausted.

“Hey,” said a woman around your age if you had to guess, her hair silky and tied back in a loose ponytail, a black floral tank top and jeans on. “You’re Y/N, right?”

“Uh yeah,” you said, offering her a smile. “You’re Cara Micks. You’re playing Maddie. My parents were really glad they managed to get you. Everybody wants you in their stuff after that indie film.”

“One little Oscar nom and suddenly I’m not surviving off ramen in an apartment with four roommates,” she laughed, nodding her head. “I uh, I’m really glad I got this role, even if it’s not what my agent wanted me to pick. Working with your dad is like a dream come true. He has such a good reputation. I know this’ll be a good set.”

“I can guarantee it’ll be one of the best you ever work on,” you said as she wiped off her forehead.

“Plus it’s a good story. You did the set design, right?” she asked. You hummed, her eyes lighting up. “I got to sneak down and see some of the set mock ups earlier today. They look really cool. I’d love to know more about how that kind of stuff works. If that’s okay. People seem to think I know a lot about this business when I’ve really only done a few gigs before.”

“Well, I’ve never been on a set I’ve designed before so I’m right there with you but I’d happily answer any questions. I’ll leave the acting stuff to my dad though. I can barely tell you what a mark is,” you said, Cara smiling as she closed her eyes. “You good to drive?”

“Yeah, just tired. I’ll see you tomorrow though. Maybe we can grab lunch?” she asked.

“Sure,” you said, Cara handing over her phone. You exchanged numbers and watched her drive off as your parents walked out of the restaurant, others trailing out. 

“Ready for bed? We got an early day tomorrow,” said your mom. You hummed and closed your eyes, your dad rubbing your back.

“Come on. Sooner we get back soon you can head to sleep.”

“Oh my god! It’s my basement!” you said, hopping up and down when you walked onto set the next morning. 

“And what a lovely torture basement it is, kiddo,” laughed your dad. You walked around the set, poking at the shelves, surprised they actually put the cobblestone walls in. He nudged you when you ran your hands over it, a proud smile on his face. “It does look good. Appreciate the fact you know an old shack would have cobblestone and not cinder blocks.”

“That was the point,” you said, walking around the space, stopping at the chair in the center of the basement. “They even found the same chair!”

“They do tend to make the sets match what’s designed,” he chuckled, following you around set, hands clasped behind his back. “You should do this full-time. Design.”

“I don’t know,” you said with a shrug, watching him take a seat on the wooden steps. You sat down in the chair across from him, resting your chin in your hands. “TJ has great benefits so it’s not like a fear of having to be self-employed or not getting gigs. I could not work and we’d be perfectly fine.”

“If you have a sense of obligation to stay at the brewery-”

“I know I don’t have to,” you said. “The team does all the real work.”

“So what’s keeping you from giving it a shot? I mean,” he said, leaning back on his elbows, kicking his legs out in front of him, “You’ve got more than a few projects under your belt. You have the resume, connections. You can set your own schedule. Granted, yeah, it’s not going to be every single day and there’ll be long days sometime but you’ve already handled that with two small kids and working another job.”

“I know,” you said, his head cocking as he smiled. 

“So…” You closed your eyes and sighed.

“My brewery job you gave me. And somehow people always know I’m your daughter, even when I use Hanover in projects. I just…if I do this full time people are going to assume I got the job because of my dad and I’ll never know if it’s because I’m good at it or if a director wants to work with you. You know?” He nodded, smirking as he glanced down at the concrete floor. “You know it’s true.”

“Nepotism is a thing in this industry for sure. But I also am a product of that through grandpa and people he knew. Nepotism gets you in the door as a guest and it’s right to acknowledge that. Talent gets you invited to stay at the party long after all the wannabe’s head home.”

“But I didn’t earn it like someone off the street,” you said. He sighed, running his hand through his hair.

“Cold hard truth? No one knew who the fuck you were when you submitted that first portfolio for your first project. Nobody. I know that because I worked with the director of that project after and he had zero clue you’re my kid. He recommended you to other projects before I came along so you did earn it. You’re right. You’ll never know for sure but you shouldn’t stop because of it. You don’t always have to start in last place to be worthy of earning first.”

“But nepotism is basically cheating your way to first,” you said.

“Sometimes, yeah. Sometimes, it’s a kid who is talented who got in on her own and won’t give herself a break to do something she clearly loves because she thinks it was a gift. Even if it was a gift, take it. Life threw enough shit at you. Take the nice crap too.”

You pursed your lips, looking around. “You think I’m good at this?”

“Mom and I didn’t approach you to do this project for shits and giggles. We knew you’d do quality work and sure as shit, you did. There are not a lot of sets on this film. Most scenes take place out in the woods so the pieces we do have, they need to be fucking good. And this room doesn’t even have four walls and it’s scary as hell so yeah, I’d say you’re good at this.” He stood up, holding out his hands. “Come on, let’s go check out the rest of the sets.”

“Has anyone seen Cara today?” asked the director, Dave close to lunchtime. You glanced up from where you sat in your dad’s chair, your mom over at the film tent with the other producers.

“She’s still not here?” asked your dad as he walked off set. They’d been filming for a few hours for his scenes at the police station but those were wrapped up, everyone ready to start in the basement once lunch break was over. “That doesn’t seem like her.”

You pulled out your phone and dialed, getting no answer. You tried a few more times and got more of the same. 

“This fucking kid,” grumbled Dave, leaning back in his seat. “Can someone get over to her hotel room and tell her to get her ass on set? I don’t care if she was nominated for a fucking Oscar. She pulls any diva shit and I’ll kick her out.”

“She said she was tired last night,” you said, several heads turning your direction. “When we left dinner. She looked a little ill too, like sweaty.”

“Well if she’s sick she’s supposed to call in. She better be fucking dying for not giving notice,” said Dave. You raised your eyebrow at him, Dave giving it right back. “I’m not being dramatic. It’s in her contract what she’s supposed to do if she’s sick.”

“Maybe so but a little common decency doesn’t hurt. You shouldn’t wish for someone to be ‘fucking dying’ because they’re not at work on time,” you shot back. You could feel the eyes on you, most of the nearby crew watching you. 

To your surprise Dave nodded, his face relaxing. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have said that. Let’s have someone get over to her place and see what’s going on.”

People dispersed for lunch, your parents holding hands as they stopped at the chair and your dad grabbed his phone.

“Sorry I did that,” you said as you stood. They shared a smile, your dad tucking you under his shoulders as you walked out of the studio.

“We’re not,” said your mom, tilting her head up to your dad. “Remember when she used to be scared of men?”

“You wouldn’t know it with that little display,” he said, squeezing your shoulder. “And you think you’re riding off my reputation in this business. Think again, tall munchkin. Things like that are why people want to work with you.”

“I could have done it privately,” you said with a shrug.

“Don’t take shit on a set. We both did,” said your mom. “It’s nice to know you won’t.”

“Well, what’s the worst that’ll happen? I get fired? So what,” you said. 

“We did good,” said your dad, releasing you to high-five your mom. You rolled your eyes and walked ahead, turning around to walk backwards.

“Excuse me but I did good. Y’all were just like…there,” you said, smirking. Both their faces fell and you sighed, stopping in your tracks. “Oh my god, it was a joke! Guys. You two driving me insane as a teenager was incredibly helpful. You definitely did good. Promise.”

“Well,” said your mom with a smile, “It was a team effort.”

“It was,” you said, your dad biting his bottom lip. You spun around and smiled. “It didn’t hurt having a good guy want to be my dad. He set the bar high so I don’t accept shit. I appreciate that.”

You glanced over your shoulder and caught him smiling off to the side, his cheeks a hot pink.

“Dad are you blushing?” you teased. He snapped his attention to you and rolled his eyes, failing to keep his lips from curling up. 

“God no. I don’t blush,” he scoffed. 

“Sure you don’t,” you said, smiling as you headed for the catering tent. “I forgot you’re a super tough manly man.”

“Damn straight I am,” he said. You shook your head and got in line, looking up when you felt him by your side. “You shouldn’t feel guilty.”

“Dad-” you said quietly as you both stepped forward. 

“Your parents hurt us, they hurt you. You didn’t do anything to us. I wouldn’t be strong enough to risk getting hurt by another set of parents let alone believe they love me. I’d be terrified. You’ve always been the strong one in this family, kiddo. You don’t have to say nice things to make me feel better.”

You shook your head, smiling when you looked down. “I don’t say things to you to make you feel better, dad. You or mom. I only say what I believe and genuinely, you made me know what to expect out of men and if they don’t deliver, I’ll let them know about it. I’m not blowing smoke up your ass.”

He smirked, nodding to himself. “You stopped feeling guilty before we even got out here, didn’t you.”

“What can I say? You guys give good pep talks,” you said, feeling your mom hug your waist from behind. “It’s still cool that I came out though right?”

“Don’t ask dumb questions, kiddo,” he chuckled. “Let’s get some lunch and hopefully Cara will be back by then.”

“We have a big problem,” said Dave, stopping by your lunch table about twenty minutes later. Your parents left, leaving the rest of you wondering what was going on. When your lunch break was up, people headed back to their various departments, your dad appearing out of nowhere and giving you a strange look.

“What’s wrong?” you asked.

“Cara has food poisoning it sounds like. The PA that went over found her vomiting. She’s taking her to the hospital to get some fluids in her. Hopefully she’s feeling better later.”

“Oh. Well that’s good,” you said, that strange look still there. “Dad…”

“Technically the scenes we need to film this afternoon are all my coverage. Since Cara’s stunts don’t start until next week, her stunt double and stand in aren’t here yet. But you may have noticed you and Cara share a certain-”

“You want me to fucking double for Cara Micks? Me?” you asked as he smiled.

“You guys are the same height, size. Your hair’s almost the exact same. Literally all you have to do is put on some clothes, sit in a chair with some make up on and make sounds like you’re scared. It’s not going to be hard at all.” You stared at him, his eyes searching yours. “I promise it’s as easy as-”

You crossed your arms and glanced down, kicking at the pavement. “You’re filming the scenes where Ben finds Maddie. Your coverage.”

“Exactly,” he said, voice dropping slightly. “You don’t have to. We can find another woman to I’m sure. I just thought you’re perfect for it already. But you don’t-”

“Dad. It’s not the being a stand in. I don’t mind that,” you said. He cocked his head when you raised yours, sighing deeply. “I’m nervous that…I know that scene. I remember it from the design. Maddie is tied up in a chair in a basement. And I know it’s a film set and it’s safe but…”

You shrugged, smiling wearily.

“House six,” you whispered, his head nodding. “I’m just-”

“I never should have asked,” he said softly. “I’m sorry.” 

“Dad, no,” you said, grabbing his arm before he could go. You tugged him away between some trailers, letting go when you ran your hand through your hair. 

“Tall munchkin, there is no way I would make you do that. I am so sorry I-”

“Stop. Please.” He snapped his lips shut. After a beat you leaned back against a trailer wall, breathing slowly. “Ben’s a cop. House six, that prick was a cop. I need…I don’t know the script that much, only the early parts, if at all. Tell me Ben’s a good guy.”

“He has his rough spots but by the end of the movie, Ben and Maddie are basically father and daughter. It’s a big step for her considering her own father is the one that had her kidnapped and then tried to kill her.” You pursed your lips, his eyes scanning the clouds overhead. “This is going to sound corny as hell but just listen to me for a minute.”

“Okay,” you said as he met your gaze.

“You’re a grown woman. I recognize that and respect it. You can make your own choices, own mistakes, successes. You have a husband and children and I know when you’re in trouble, I’m not the first person you turn to anymore. That’s okay. It’s normal.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and smirked. “But you’re still my little girl. I will always do my best to protect you or I’ll go down swinging in the process. You don’t have to worry about if the character I’m playing is good or bad. I’m your dad. Behind every character is me. And you know me and what I’d do for you.”

You looked away, nodding a few times.

“You don’t have to do this. At all. But understand that I would not allow anything to happen to you if I didn’t believe it was safe. I’ll let you get some bumps and scrapes along the way cause that’s life. But no more scars. Because I told you that night on the road my job is to protect you, that I’ll never hurt you. You know that deep down but you need to hear it out loud sometimes because you get scared.”

You felt him step closer and forced yourself to face him. “What?”

“I will never let anything like what happened in that house happen to you again. Understand?” 

“Okay.”

“Okay,” he smiled, giving you a hug. “Why don’t you go hang out in my trailer for a bit? It’s going to take a little bit to find someone and start filming again.”

“Well,” you said, his eyebrow raising, “You or mom will be nearby the whole time right?”

“Absolutely,” he said. You shrugged and nodded. “You change your mind?”

“I can do it,” you said. “You sure you can?”

“Me?” he laughed. “What do you mean?”

“You gonna be cool with seeing me with fake blood and stuff?” He cocked his head and smirked. 

“Fake blood I can handle,” he said, your mom stopping by the end of the trailer. “She says she good with it.”

“Oh thank you,” she sighed, quickly grabbing your hand and dragging you behind her. “Jensen, you need to change while I get her ready.”

“See you on set, kiddo.”

“Thank you everyone,” called Dave at the end of the day. You stretched out as you stood up from the chair, your dad rubbing your shoulders that had a small ache to them. “That’s a wrap for the day.”

“How you feeling?” asked your dad, massaging the muscles with my force, the ache soothing away.

“That helps,” you said, Dave coming over to you. 

“I really do appreciate you filling in for us today, Y/N,” he said. 

“It’s no problem. I didn’t have to do much,” you said.

“Well thanks anyways, and for calling me out earlier. I want this to be a fun set.”

“I think I figured that out when dad started carrying me out of the scene upside down,” you laughed, your dad chuckling. “How’s Cara feeling?”

Dave shared a look with your dad, his hands falling away from you. “She still at the hospital?”

“Appendicitis. It fucking popped this afternoon.”

“Shit,” said your dad. “That’s bad.”

“She was being prepped for surgery when it happened, which was good, I guess. They were able to go in fast and clean her up. I was going to drop by in a bit and check up on her.”

“Dee and I’ll go too. Her parents know?”

“On the way but Florida’s pretty far. They won’t be here until around midnight. I’ll see you guys there,” he said when he got pulled away by another producer.

“Can I go?” you asked. 

“Sure. Let’s stop by hair and makeup so they can clean you up first.”

The Next Morning

“What do you think they’re going to do?” said the key grip as everyone ate breakfast together. Cara was doing better but she was on strong antibiotics so she didn’t get an infection and her surgery had been more invasive than if her appendix hadn’t burst. All in all, it meant she was on bed rest for a few weeks and looking at a full month before she was going to be cleared for work.

Which wouldn’t have been a big problem if your dad didn’t have a project lined up for six weeks from now. 

“There’s no way we can finish on time unless they got in a backfill today,” said Molly, your dad’s PA, slurping down a bowl of oatmeal. “Jensen has two different films he’s supposed to be in once we wrap and they’re big studio ones. No way he’d drop those to finish this late with Cara.”

“Couldn’t they just push until after he does the movies? That’s only a few weeks, really randomly too. He wouldn't be needed every day at those,” you said. The key grip, a very, very tall man named Ivan shook his head.

“Cara’s got a Marvel role she starts prepping for then. By the time both their schedules are free it’s late winter and we can’t film in that, not when the movie takes place in the early fall. So that pushes us back to next summer which a lot of the time means we’re dead in the water.”

“Yup,” said Molly with a sigh. “I liked this job. Your dad’s not a dickhead and I’ve worked with some dickheads before.”

“How hard is it to find another actress though? Couldn’t they call up like the girl that came in second in the auditions?” you asked. They shared a look and you frowned. “I clearly am not in on the gossip.”

“It’s okay. You just got here,” said Molly, slurping up more oatmeal. “Rumor is it took like five months to find someone to play Maddie. No one could pull off the intense moments in the script until they got Cara. It’s an amazing script but damn, the lead actress has to be able to do a fucking lot.”

“What do you mean? How’s that different than any other story?” you asked, Ivan chuckling. “I am so out of the loop.”

“Set designers normally are. We hardly ever see you guys to be fair. But basically Maddie in the story has be vulnerable but funny, a whimpering mess but also frighteningly creepy. Soft but strong. Do a number of fight scenes with grown ass men twice her size. All while running around in the woods most days, freezing her ass off during the many night shoots and being able to not oversell the emotional moments and have it come off as cheesy instead of awesome. It’ll be a miracle to find someone like Cara Micks.”

“Oh. Well that sucks. The movie sounds cool. I really want to see if get made,” you said, your mom ducking into the tent with a smile, waving you over. “I’ll be back guys.”

“Let us know if you find out anything!” said Molly. You gave them a smile and walked out of the tent with your mom, surprised when she was practically jogging away.

“Where are you going?” you laughed, following after, grateful you were in a pair of sneakers and leggings today. She just waved and you followed her into your dad’s trailer, many pairs of eyes on you. Your dad and Dave were there along with the other producers that were on set, the assistant director, the writer and a few other people you didn’t know. “Hi.”

You took the only open seat at the far end of the little couch across from your dad, Dave walking over and squatting down in front of you. “Uh, can someone explain what’s happening?”

“I’m sure you’ve heard we’re a bit fucked without Cara. We can’t film a two lead movie without one of our leads. She’s a hard girl to replace,” said Dave. Your eyes flicked up to your dad, his lips pressed into a thin line. “We would like it if you’d entertain us for a few hours and try to film a few scenes with Jensen. You already did the stand in work yesterday and that was great-”

“I played a barely conscious girl yesterday. I didn’t have to do anything.” You got to your feet and shook your head. “I can’t act let alone replace the girl who almost got an Oscar. I will happily be a stand-in but guys…y’all do realize I’m not related by blood to these guys, right? There is zero chance any acting talent was passed along. I haven’t acted since the fourth grade where I played girl #4. Does that sound like the person you want starring in a freaking movie with him?”

Your dad shrugged. “I think you’re selling yourself short.”

You were wide eyed, mouth dropping. Had he lost his mind?

“You’re very smart. You had a lot of good suggestions during pre-production,” said Dave, taking a seat on the couch. 

“Sets. Sets I get. I have a degree in architecture and so does my husband. I know walls and floors and ceilings. This? I have zero fucking clue about acting.” Dave looked at your parents, slowly returning his gaze back to you. “I can’t do it. I’ll ruin your damn movie.”

“Well we can’t film shit without Cara so let us try for two hours. If you’re as shitty as you say you are, then I have no problem telling you that. Let us try to grab a life preserver before we go down with the ship. That’s all we’re asking,” said Dave. You grumbled, putting your back to the room before sighing.

“Fine. But no one get mad at me when I can’t do it, alright?” you said, turning around with a huff.

“Perfect. Get her a script and in hair and make up. Jensen, we’ll give you twenty minutes to rehearse before we’ll try on set.” You were ushered out of the room and twenty later you were back there with a wad of paper in your hand, wearing the same dirty t-shirt, leggings and sneakers you wore in the basement scene yesterday.

“Why the fuck would you volunteer me for this?” you said the second you were in his trailer, your dad snapping his head up from where he sat on the couch with his own papers. “When have I ever expressed an interest in acting? I look like shit. I’m not a bombshell like Cara Micks. I look like damn roadkill. You are insane for thinking I could pull something like this off. Why, why do you think I can do this? What is wrong with you, dad?”

He looked you up and down, a soft smile on his face. “Stop smiling! I’m pissed!”

“You do realize the qualities Maddie has in the movie are all ones you have, don’t you? You can do it because you have done it. And don’t tell me you can’t act,” he scoffed. You threw up your hands, dropping your papers.

“Of course I can’t fucking act! Why on earth would you think I can?” you said. He walked over in front of you, crossing his arms and staring you down. “What is wrong with you? I can’t-”

“You can act with the best of them.” You could only stare with wide eyes, growing angrier at the smug expression on his face.

“Stop saying that!” you shot back. “Why would you make me do this? I’m going to humiliate myself and you and mom and-”

He started to laugh and you’d had enough. You turned to leave, his hands gently catching your shoulders. You swore your eye was twitching when you faced him, that stupid smile still there.

“Oh, kiddo. I watched you put on a class act for months when you first came to us. Before that? Acted your ass off in those shitty foster homes. Acted your ass off when you put in anonymous calls to get the truly awful ones shut down. Pretended it was all okay to those monsters faces when it was eating you up inside. Even with your birth parents you pretended to be perfect for them.” He got in your face, tilting his head ever so slightly. “You can act and it’s like I told you yesterday. You’re safe here. So trust me to keep you safe and you can act when your damn survival doesn’t depend on it for the first time in your life. Trust me, it’s going to be a hell of a lot easier than the last time you acted.”

You frowned, growling as he leaned back. “Has anyone ever told you how irritating it is that you always have a fucking point?”

“I recall being told once or twice by a certain munchkin,” he chuckled, picking up the papers and handing them over. “Oh and Y/N? You are beautiful, even with that bruised makeup on your face. Believe me.”

“Dad. You have to say that.”

“Hm, no I don’t,” he laughed, taking a seat. “You don’t know how many death glares I’ve handed out over the years. Plus your husband never shuts up about how pretty you are.”

“Don’t make me smile. I’m still annoyed with you,” you said, sitting down at his kitchenette table, fixing your pages. “Do I have to have this memorized?”

“Let’s just practice a few times and go from there.”

Two Weeks Later

It was quiet out. Then again it normally was at two in the morning. You sipped on your thermos of hot coffee while the crew took a short break. You passed it to your dad beside you, the two of you sat in front of a fire in the forest. Above you was a clearing in the sky, so many stars out in the deep wilderness.

“You’re happy.” You glanced to your right, the shadows dancing across his face. 

“Yeah,” you whispered, looking back up at the sky. “It’s so pretty here.”

“I’m really glad I get to do this with you,” he said quietly. 

“Me too.” You took the thermos back from him, taking another sip. You were both quiet, watching the flames in front of you. He wore a long sleeve henley while you were still in your t shirt and leggings. But at least tonight you got to wear his warm flannel between takes. Until he’d give it to you in the scene at least. You set the thermos behind the log where it’d be hidden from view when they turned the cameras back on in a few minutes, catching your dad close his eyes. “Dad. Don’t fall asleep.”

“I’m not sleeping. Just happy.” You hummed, connecting the stars in the sky, trying to find the big dipper. “Kiddo?”

“Yeah?” 

“It’s to the left of that branch.” You spotted him with eyes open, darting around as they made connections.

“I used to sit outside when I was a kid and stare at the stars. No one ever bothered me when I did that,” you said, pointing out the little dipper to him. “Always seemed so peaceful up there.”

“Did you find a little peace down here?” You nodded, laughing quietly. “What’s so funny?”

“You wonder where I get it from,” you said, shaking your head. “You want to be told you’re loved as much as I do.”

“I suppose I do,” he said, the heat of his gaze on you. 

“Yeah, I found my peace down here. Don’t think I ever told him the night of my seventeenth birthday was the first time I slept through the night in a decade. I got my peace a very long time ago, just was afraid of losing it.”

“Afraid anymore?” he whispered. You shook your head, catching Orion far off on the other side of the clearing. 

“No. No one can take my peace away from me ever again.” He shifted closer, letting you rest your head on his shoulder. “This is the longest I’ve ever been away from TJ since we’ve been together.”

He hummed, breathing softly.

“How do you stand being away from mom for weeks at a time?” He crossed his arms, smiling to himself.

“Why do you think I’d fly all night just to see her and you guys for half a day? We know how to make long distance work. Our whole relationship has always had an element of it. But getting a hug when you get home eases that ache that forms.”

“I miss Thomas,” you whispered. 

“You’ll see him and the babies tomorrow,” he said, crew memembers starting to gather back around, eyes fluttering open. “He has a surprise for you.”

“Oh god. What’d he do?” He held up his hands and scooted back over to his mark. You put on puppy dog eyes, a sigh leaving him. 

“He and the kids made you a cake. He misses you too.” You inhaled deeply. “Do you regret-”

“No. I just need a moment with him is all.” You forced a smile and nodded. “Alright. Let’s do this.”

Three Weeks Later

“You’re so pretty,” whispered TJ as you exited the bathroom in a pair of pajama shorts and one of his t-shirts. You laughed, pushing back your damp hair before crawling into bed with him. “I can’t believe I’m sleeping with a movie star.”

You slapped his chest, TJ giggling, rolling himself so he rested his chin on your chest. You ran your fingers through his dark strands, TJ inhaling slowly.

“If this was something you wanted to try, you know we’ll figure it out, right?” You smiled, nodding once.

“People said I did good.”

“If you mean your parents bragging about how fucking incredible you did then sure, you did good.” You traced your finger over his cheek, concern growing in his eyes. “You’ve moved on from the brewery and we both know it. You can clearly do this acting thing if you wanted.”

“Thomas,” you sighed. He wrapped his arms under you, giving you a squeeze. “The only reason I did it in the first place was to help. I did it to spend time with my parents. I got to hang out with my dad so much and a lot of the stuff we filmed…I couldn’t have done that with someone else.”

“I have no problem with you not taking your career that direction if you don’t want to do it. But I don’t want you to not try because you do want it and you’re scared. I want you to go after everything you want in life,” he said quietly, tilting his head up, kissing your jaw. “That’s all I want from you.”

“I don’t want it,” you said, closing your eyes. “I want to get into set design full time. Being away for so long, even coming home on the weekend in the middle there…I don’t want to be gone from you guys for that long regularly.”

“I understand, believe me. We missed you too,” he said, giving you another squeeze. “But we’d go with you if you wanted.”

“I know you would,” you murmured, slowly peeling open your eyes to find him with a smile on his lips. “Let’s put it in the maybe someday again category, if it were with my parents. Until then, I am ready to take a few weeks off and spend some time home.”

He nuzzled you and chuckled. “Why not make a vow to not leave this bed? That can easily be arranged.”

“You’re cockier than usual, my sweet boy,” you teased, TJ lifting himself up on his hands, leaning down over you. “Feeling needy?”

“I haven’t slept with my wife in three weeks. I’m fucking needy. Now if the movie star was so kind-” You smacked him with a pillow, TJ putting on a shocked face. “Is this how you hollywood types are?”

“You’re such an ass!” you laughed, hitting him again, TJ plopping all of his weight down straight on top of you. “Thomas!”

A throat cleared in the room, TJ spinning around and in front of you quickly, your dad smirking at you both. “Well I didn’t mean to interrupt this strange…whatever flirting thing this is but I do need to talk to Y/N. It’s kind of important.”

“What’s up?” you asked, shoving a pillow in TJ’s lap to hide the tent in his pants. 

“Your birth parents got wind that you were doing a movie.” You narrowed your eyes as he sighed. “They gave an interview an hour ago. My team is freaking out. I couldn’t care less what they say but-”

“But it could damage your reputation.” 

He was blank faced but you knew it could be turn into a big deal. “I don’t give a shit about mine. But they said you only got set design jobs because I got them for you and I know how much it means to you to make your name on your own. Just don’t look at your phones or go online for a while. I’m going to fix this. I promise.” 

“Is there anything we should do? Or I guess shouldn’t?” asked TJ. 

“I know you two are careful about handing out your numbers but don’t answer any calls-”

“I know how to fix all of this,” you said. You felt both of their eyes on you as you climbed out of bed and tugged on TJ’s hoodie sitting on the bench at the foot of it. You glanced back at TJ and then to your dad.

“You want me to release that video. The security footage from the back porch with your parents,” he said. 

“Yes and no.” You slipped past him and went down the hall to the kitchen, both of them following as you grabbed an empty coffee mug from the cabinet. You set it under the coffee machine and after a moment it was churning, the pair of them looking very confused. “On a scale of one to ten, how much will your team freak out if you don’t say anything for like…twelve hours?”

“Considering this is the most controversial thing that’s ever happened to me, probably like a fifty. Why? You’re thinking of something,” he said.

“Like I said, I know how to fix this. But I need time and a few other things.”

“This isn’t your mess to fix,” he said. “I’ll release the video with a statement or-”

“Or…you can give me what I need and I can guarantee anyone with a brain who thinks you and mom manipulated me will change their minds.” You could tell he didn’t want to have to get you involved. He knew how much they’d hurt you. All he wanted to do was protect you from them ever doing that again.

“Give her a chance, Jensen,” said TJ, getting out another mug for himself. “I know my wife. If she has an idea, let’s give it a shot.”

You stepped forward and stood in front of him, his lips pressed into a thin line. “It’s your choice, dad. We can do whatever you and your team want. I just feel like if I said something first it’d mean more. I really need you trust me with this if you-”

“What do you need?” he asked, a small smile on his lips. You nodded, inhaling deeply and grabbing the pad of paper and a pen from nearby.

“You instagram password to start.” He jotted it down, giving you a look to not do anything stupid with his account. “I also need the login to the cloud account with the video backup at the house.”

“I can send you the video of your parents directly. It’ll be easier than-”

“Dad. Just give me the login.” He wrote down more on the pad, his eyes concerned now. “How far back does it go?”

“Since we had the house. What-”

“Is it just video or audio too?”

“Both…I’m pretty sure the security company compresses the files.” You hummed, grabbing the paper and picking up your mug, heading for your home office.

“Uh, is there anything we can do?” asked TJ. You spun around and took a sip of coffee.

“Keep the coffee coming and dad, tell your team you need to discuss with your family and you’ll have a statement out by the morning. Otherwise, do not disturb me.”

You slipped away into your office, leaning back against it. 

“This is gonna be a long night.”

Twelve Hours Later

You yawned as you exited your office, quickly making your way down to the bedroom and plopping down next to a sleeping TJ. You were asleep in an instant and woke up a few hours later at noon to TJ shoving on your shoulder.

You were pretty sure you growled at him but he knew how tired you were after the jet lag and staying up a full day. But you needed to try to get your schedule back on track so you reluctantly let him pull you up to sitting.

“You’re on CNN! Come look!” he said. You shook your head, TJ hoisting you up, carrying you bridal style into the family room where what looked like your entire family sat watch the news.

And there was your face from the video you’d made in the middle of the night smack dab in the middle of the screen. TJ set you down as heads turned, your mom rushing over and hugging you.

“How did you make that so fast? How…you didn’t have to share those things, honey,” she said, holding on tight. 

“I just wanted people to know the difference between a bad parent and a good one,” you said, surprised to find your dad missing. “Is dad mad? I know I put a lot of private moments in and things he’d probably wished had stayed a secret.”

You spotted him come out of the hallway where the half-bath was, his face neutral. He was mad. Of course he was mad. You’d been sleep deprived when you put that video together. You fucked it up. You should have just let him handle it so you didn’t make it worse.

“Dad, I’m sorry. I should have…” you trailed off when he held up his finger and stepped in front of you. He looked you up and down and nodded a few times. “I’m sorry.”

“You make a video telling the world how miserable you used to be, about some of the bad things foster parents did and calling them out by name, about how mom and I changed your life, about how I…” he clamped his mouth shut, glancing away with a scrunched up face. You swore his bottom lip wobbled and smiled, watching him put his back to your siblings who were all watching intently. 

“Was it the part about you being the only real dad I’ve ever had that got you or how I called you a good man that anyone would be lucky enough to have in their life?”

“Goddammit, Y/N,” he said, wiping off his face, keeping his head turned away. “It’s one thing when we say that shit in private but you had to say it to everyone?”

“Yeah because everyone should know. Those assholes tried to fuck with you. My whole life assholes fucked with me and now they tried to do it to someone I love. I’m not letting that shit go anymore. So fuck my birth parents and fuck my other foster parents. If people find out that you’re a good person in the process then that’s a bonus to me.”

He sighed, forcing himself to turn around, a sad smile on his face. “I just wish you hadn’t felt forced to share those things.”

“I didn’t,” you said, his eyes widening ever so slightly in surprise. “All I wanted to do was send a message to those people that they can’t hurt me anymore. I’m sorry if I royally screwed stuff up for you or violated your privacy. I just wanted them to leave us alone from now on.”

“You didn’t, sweetie,” said your mom, tucking you into her side, your dad nodding, easing a bit. He cleared his throat and ruffled your hair, his smile relaxed now. 

“You with me for a second,” he said. You followed him down the hall to your room, frowning when you were alone.

“Dad I really am-” He pressed a finger to your lips shushing you, fixing your hair behind your ears.

“Do you remember after the accident when I couldn’t take showers and there was that time you helped me wash my hair?” You nodded as he fixed your part, smiling to himself. “I realized something that day.”

“What?” you asked quietly. He rested his hands on your shoulders, breathing slowly.

“You’re a good person too,” he said softly. You cocked your head, a sliver of a chuckle slipping past his lips. “I knew before then but in that moment, when you with one arm in a sling offered to help me, I just knew I was damn lucky I wound up with a kid like you.”

“You were hurt and I helped…how does that make me a good person for doing what I should have in the first place?”

“Welcome to life in my head the past three hours while everyone in my life tells me how amazing I am when all I did with you was what I was supposed to.” 

“Well…” you groaned, stomping your foot. “How do you always do that! Every single time you turn it around on me. It’s not fair!”

“I’ve been playing the game longer than you have,” he chuckled, picking up a hair tie off your dresser and bunching up your hair. “Something I learned with your youngest sister is if you start braiding their hair, then you have a captive audience so you can get out of them whatever intel you need.”

You raised your eyebrow at him as he started to work the hair together, ignoring your face. “And what intel are you looking to get out of me?”

“Just sharing a parenting tip,” he chuckled. “You? You I think I have a pretty good idea of where we stand.”

“Oh you do, huh?” You glanced down, annoyed at the fact he could do a far better fishtail braid than you ever had. He slipped the tie off his wrist, twisting it in place a few times before humming.

“Yeah. I mean, I’m apparently the best dad that ever existed so…” he said, chuckling when you lightly punched his arm. 

“You’re just…” you trailed off with a shrug, a smile on his face. “Are you mad? About me showing all those videos of us from home over the years?”

“No,” he said, shaking his head. “Honestly, I loved it. Made me cry like a baby but I loved it. I know you’re pretty damn selective about who you let in but I’m glad I made the cut.”

“Yeah, well, you’re alright for an old guy.” You smirked, getting one in return. “I love you?”

“Yeah you’re lucky I’m still in a good mood,” he said, cocking his head. “Want to know why you’re on the news?”

“Because you’re oh so famous,” you said dramatically, his eyes narrowing. “You so want to give me a noogie, don’t you.”

“The desire is strong,” he said, clasping his hands behind his back. “In news surprising no one, your birth parents were keeping more secrets. Apparently they stole money from their shady employer. A lot of money. Which then the attempt on their lives were made. They were never in witness protection. They were working a deal with the government. Go undercover and they wouldn’t be arrested for partaking in those shady deals themselves. They took the deal and ran. Feds lost them a long, long time ago. You were only supposed to be in foster care a few weeks. But when those dummies got money hungry…they seem to have forgotten they’re fugitives. Pretty interesting have people like that call me the manipulator huh?”

You parted your lips, holding up a hand. “Did they arrest them?”

“It was in process on the news when you came out,” he said as you stood and headed for the door.

“Oh, I want to see this.”

“Knock knock,” said your dad that evening as you lay in bed, ready for a full night’s sleep. “Need anything before we head out?”

“I’ll take a hug,” you said as you sat up. 

“Those I’m an expert on.” He walked over and sat on the edge of the mattress, giving a big squeezing one. “Get some rest. You had a long day.”

“So many phone calls. On the plus side my birth parents were arrested, the DA is looking into most of my old foster parents and you gained like a couple hundred thousand followers in like twelve hours. You can tell your PR team thank you.”

“She’s so modest and humble,” he teased, kissing your temple. “Tomorrow will be better. We’ll do breakfast burritos like a normal Sunday. How’s that sound?”

You hummed, closing your eyes. “Can you do one more thing before you go?”

“Shoot,” he said quietly.

“Can you go in my closet and get rid of the duffel bag with the files in it?” He leaned back, letting you lay back against your pillows. “I think it’s time for it to go. I don’t need it anymore.”

He smiled and stood up. “Okay then. Mind if I hang onto it?”

“Do as you please,” you said, closing your eyes. 

“You sure you don’t need these papers anymore?” he asked.

“I have my letters from you. That’s all I ever needed,” you said, shuffling the background. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, tall munchkin,” he said, tugging your blankets up. “You realize the studio wants us to make another movie together after this, don’t you?”

“It’s gotta be at a resort or no deal,” you said. He chuckled, quietly opening the door. “You can negotiate that right?”

“We’ll see,” he said. The room grew quiet for a beat before you heard his heavy exhale. “I’m really glad I managed to prove you wrong about trusting me. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to.”

“You’re annoyingly relentless like that,” you said, turning on your side, tucking your covers up. “Love you.”

“Love you back. Sleep tight, kiddo.”

__________

#jensen x daughter!reader #jensen ackles #daughter!reader #jensen ackles x daughter!reader #spn fanfic #supernatural fanfic #jensen ackles fanfic

[messrmoonyy]

And she would rescue me

Tess Servopoulos x Fem!reader

Summary- Tess doesn’t know why she stopped to help you. She doesn’t know why she thought bringing into the QZ was a good idea either. But now you’re in her apartment and she’ll be damned if she’s about to let you die. Snippets of the days you spend with her

A/N- this came to me so randomly in the middle of getting extremely frustrated over a request I couldn’t get my mind to wrap around, and I smashed out a few thousand words and decided I loved it. I feel like there’s a lot of injured reader x Joel fics but not enough Tess ones. So here’s my spin on it.

Warnings- 18+ || light discussion of injuries, I think this is sliigghttllyyy ooc tess, tess realising she can actually let someone in, tess learning to trust tbh, smut towards the end( it isn’t as detailed as usual cause Lord this OS is long I had to chop things out ) : oral ( reader receiving ) , fingering ( tess receiving), tess gets a little panicked during one part of the smut but she’s totally okay, can I get a hell yeah for tess being vulnerable?!

Word count- 13k only proof read once

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Reblogs and comments are always appreciated/ encouraged <3

She didn’t really know why she’d done it. Why she hadn’t just… kept walking. Minded her own fucking business and gone home. But how could she? She still had some kind of humanity left in her, enough that meant she wouldn’t just walk past a girl dying.

Which, when she thought about it, was almost laughable. She’d left her fair share of people dying, most of them dying because of her own actions. So. Clearly her humanity liked to pick and choose its moments. And maybe if this scenario had happened 10 more years into the apocalypse, she would have left you there.

But it hadn’t. The world was still yet to rip the final shreds of humanity out of her.

You had been in a heap at the bottom of a slope, where the concrete of the road had been bombed and now created a jagged rocky mess. She’d thought you were dead at first. No one really ever survived outside the wall on their own, so it wasn’t wrong of her to assume. And if she was truly honest she thought that checking on you was worth it, even if you were dead because you might actually have something decent on you.

Well that’s what she’d told Joel anyway. Her and Joel were close, ridiculously close. They knew each other inside and out but she always noticed she had held onto a little more of her humanity of the years where as he seemed to have buried his deeply away. She was the one that still had a tiny candle flickering in her chest, a warmth that allowed her to hope and care. Even if some days she did feel like snuffing it out. No matter how twisted and dark her mind had become over the years, she still had some light trapped in there.

And so even with Joel’s complaints she had gone over to you. Using the excuse of simply hoping to pull something useful from the corpse. But no. You’d been alive. Barely it seemed. But alive.

Firstly she’d checked you over for any sign of a bite, carefully pushing at you and moving your clothes for any sign of fungus crawling through your veins. Last thing she wanted was another infected crawling around out there, as if their journeys out of the city weren’t difficult enough as it was. So she checked, ready to shoot you in the head if she found even a single sign of a mushroom. And when she’d found none… she’d stood up to leave. You had nothing on you. Even your clothes were fucked. Nothing worth her time. You’d be dead soon and just another body littering the streets. She should just go home and get out of the rain.

But she found herself unable to move. Even when Joel chastised her for wasting time when he just wanted to get back inside the wall and drink himself to sleep.

“ I am not taking some damn girl back inside the wall “ he hissed “ This isn’t you Tess “

“ she’s dying Joel “

“ and so let her die. People die every goddamn day. Including us if we get caught tryna smuggle some girl through the wall. And what’re you gonna do when you get back? What if she dies anyway huh? “

She’d looked down at you again, debating listening to him. If you did die on the way back she’d be stuck with the task of trying to dispose of a dead body. Which she had done plenty of times before but, if they found you without any records of ever being accepted into the QZ? That could cause some problems.

But you were still alive. Somehow. Somehow you had managed to survive out there, and from the flaking dried blood on your face you’d been there a while. You were strong. She liked that.

Joel was wrapped around her finger so even with his protesting it didn’t surprise her that she’d managed to talk him round.

The real surprise was that they’d managed to get back inside the wall, through the tunnels and into her apartment unnoticed. Joel unceremoniously dumping you down on her bed and leaving with muttered curses under his breath that he wasn’t gonna help if she got caught. Which was bullshit. Of course he would.

That had been 2 days ago.

You were still where Joel had left you, but she made you more comfortable. Changed you out of your filthy clothes and bandaged your ankle. From the bruising and the swelling she assumed you’d broken it. But there wasn’t much telling what exactly you’d done, X-rays weren’t exactly easy to go and get now.

She’d also cleaned the injury on your head, washing away the dried blood and stitching up the wound. It wasn’t exactly neat. But she didn’t think you’d mind. She’d saved your life after all. She sat you up every now and again to coax water into you, smashing up painkillers and dissolving them in some hope you weren’t in too much pain.

You’d barely woken up the entire time. Occasionally your eyes would open for a few seconds, gaze around the room in a way that made you look drunk, and then pass back out again. She was starting to get worried. Because you needed to eat sooner rather than later. Dosing you with water and pills was one thing but it would be useless if you didn’t eat anything.

She kept a close eye on you. Locking the doors whenever she went out for work assignments and hoping you wouldn’t wake up and freak out whilst she was gone. But you didn’t. She came home, gave you water and meds, and then went to bed.

She’d been sleeping on the couch. The bed was big enough for two. But she guessed you waking up not only in a strange place but with a strange person next to you might just kill you anyway from the shock.

It made her want to laugh sometimes when she lay there at night. Maybe she was getting soft. Running around like Florence fucking Nightingale looking after a stranger that was probably gonna die anyway. And for what? What solid reason did she have for it?

None. Absolutely none.

But she couldn’t help it. Continuously tending to you and keeping you clean, keeping your bandages fresh. Wiping at your face and wondering where you’d come from, how you’d ended up out there. She had so many questions.

She was getting soft.

You woke up properly a few days after she’d found you. She wasn’t entirely sure if your bouts of unconsciousness had been due to the head injury or the painkillers. Maybe it was both. Either way, your eyes were fully open now.

To her surprise you didn’t look afraid. She found it made that little candle in her chest burn a little brighter for a moment. She was so used to people being afraid. She liked it, of course she did. But the change was nice for a brief moment. To see kind eyes looking at her like she was… a person.

You were both silent. Neither of you seemingly knowing what to say in the moment. She hadn’t really thought that far ahead. And she was confused to find herself stuck for words. Unsure of what to do. She usually was ten steps ahead of everyone, could read a room in an instant and know exactly what her next move would be.

But not now. Not there with you looking at her like that. It was frustrating.

“ welcome to the world of the living sweetheart “ she finally said, crossing her arms over her chest and watching you closely “ or half living I suppose “

“ where am I? “ your voice was hoarse. Probably because you hadn’t used it for so long. It was curious though. Not afraid. No fear laced your words as you glanced around the room, landing back on her and tilting your head slightly to the side like an inquisitive animal.

“ Boston QZ “ Tess finally spoke, grabbing a chair from the kitchen table and pulling it to the end of the bed and sitting down. You watched her every move, eyes following her from the table to where she sat “ I found you outside the wall. What the fuck were you doing out there huh? “

You seemed to ponder on the question for a moment, flickers of confusion flashing across your face. You didn’t know. How hard had you hit your head?

“ I’m not- I’m not sure - how long have I been here? “

“ few days “ your eyes widened at that, eyebrows flying up in a way that clearly hurt the wound on your head. Your hand came up to touch it, gingerly patting the stitched up space in your hairline. You then pulled at the blankets to see your ankle neatly bandaged up.

“ I fell “

“ I guess so “ she said with a sarcastic tone seeping its way into her words. Of course you’d fallen. It didn’t take a genius to work that one out.

“ so you… brought me here? “

“ a thank you would be fuckin nice “

“ oh! Thank you. Yeah of course “ you said quickly, blush creeping across your cheeks. She surprised herself by immediately thinking how… cute… it looked.

“ you feel okay though? “ she asked, immediately trying to rid herself of her previous thought. You nodded and yours eyes fell back onto her, sheepishly avoiding her gaze for more than a few seconds.

“ kinda hungry though “ to her surprise that made her smile, exhaling shortly though her nose in a small laugh.

“ yeah I bet “ she felt your eyes on her the entire time she was pottering around in the kitchenette deciding what food to get you. A small part of her did think she should’ve been smarter than to turn her back on you, you could’ve gotten out of bed and found one of the numerous weapons littered around the place. Killed her and escaped thinking she’d kidnapped you or something.

It made her glance over her shoulder.

“ you’re not gonna hurt me are you “ you said suddenly. It came out as more of statement or a fact than a question though, like you were telling yourself out loud to confirm it. Not really asking her.

“ if I wanted to hurt you I would’ve done it by now. Fuck I wouldn’t have even risked my ass bringing you though the wall “ she made her way back over to you, placing down a couple of the rationed food bars she had in front of you “ they taste like shit. But apparently one bar equals a whole fuckin meal or whatever propaganda bullshit the Military wanna tell us. Just tryna make us eat less “

“ thank you “ your eyes suddenly seemed ravenous, grabbing at the bar and taking a large bite

“ fuck. Slow down. You haven’t eaten in a week you keep going like that you’ll puke the whole thing up in ten minutes “ your cheeks flushed and you nodded, taking smaller nibbles from the shitty food bar. Looking at them already made her crave the fresh food from Bills. It’d only been days and she’d do anything for a vegetable that actually crunched. And had taste “ you can stay here till your ankles fixed… just be quiet. Stay out of sight. Last thing I want is my neck hanging from a fuckin rope because i got caught with an unregistered citizen. Okay? “

“ thank you “ she moved back to the table then, not really knowing what else she was supposed to say to you, and made herself look busy by counting ration cards. As if she hadn’t already gotten the exact number already twice over.

She was mildly regretting bringing you back. What was she supposed to do with you now? At least when you were asleep she didn’t have to worry about you drawing attention to yourself. Now you were awake, what if someone saw you. Or you decided you were in fact scared of her and started screaming or something.

She was such a fuckin idiot. Always acting on impulse when she was tired. And she had been after that hike from Lincoln. She was usually quite rational, but that all went out the window with you clearly. She should’ve listened to Joel. She probably wouldn’t even remember you by now if she’d just left you there. And now? Now she was stuck with an unregistered citizen in her apartment for fuck knows how long.

Way to fuckin go Tess.

“ I didn’t think.. I didn’t think you’d actually hurt me you know? “ you said as she stacked the cards, her eyes flickered up to find you watching her “ I just. I don’t know why I asked really. I actually feel pretty safe here. That’s stupid isn’t it? “

“ a little bit stupid. Yeah “ she agreed.

“ No one’s kind anymore. But you are. You helped me “ was she kind? Was she? She used to be. She wasn’t so sure anymore “ and you’re a woman “

“ nice observation “

“ no I mean. Men were shitty before but now? We ran into this group on the way here… I can’t remember their names but. They just took girls because they could. Kept them like slaves. Infected aren’t the scariest thing out there “ she knew that was true. Not to say that some women weren’t just as shitty. But the men were having a field day with the apocalypse. All rules had gone out the window.

It was stupid of you to trust her so easily, woman or not. She could very much have been planning to hurt you. Or demand something in return for her good nature. She wasn’t going to of course. But most people would’ve done that. If they’d even bothered to stop to help you at all.

Maybe she was kind.

By your third night- well. Nights that you were aware of anyway- in her apartment she was starting to miss when you were passed out. You woke up screaming somewhere in the early hours each night, thrashing around in the sheets and sobbing about things you couldn’t seem to explain to her.

So much for not drawing any attention to yourself.

She knew you couldn’t help it. Not really. She knew first hand from Joel. From her own nightmares that liked to sneak their way into her dreams from time to time. But you needed to be quiet.

She wondered if you’d been trapped in an endless cycle of those dream when you were unconscious. If you had been watching them on a loop as she attempted to care for you, looking so peaceful but screaming on the inside.

“ you wanna talk about those dreams of yours? “ she asked on morning number four. Remembering some slight memory of her mother telling her that talking about bad dreams would make them go away when she was a kid. Something she probably would’ve then gone on to tell her own kids. One of those small twists of the truth that parents did to try and make their children feel better. Something little and mostly useless that they took into adulthood. Even knowing that it wasn’t entirely true. But it worked a little bit.

So it was worth a try. Wasn’t it. Just because she needed you to be quiet. Not that she really cared. Of course she didn’t care. Why would she.

She couldn’t. Caring was dangerous.

“ I’m sorry I know you said about the noi- “

“ yeah you’re waking up the whole fuckin block every night sweetheart you need to get that under control “ she watched your face flush slightly in a way she had noticed you did when she slipped in the pet name. But maybe it was a mixture of embarrassment too.

It didn’t make you special. It was almost… condescending. Her way of keeping herself that one step above on the ladder, she didn’t care.

She didn’t.

“ I’m sorry I’m trying “

“ try a little harder “ you sighed and dropped your head into your hands, shaking your head. Were you crying?

“ I’m sorry “ you were “ I just keep seeing… seeing all the people and the blood and the rain and- “ she walked over to you, observing you like a injured animal that wasn’t quite sure what to do with. The kind where she didn’t know if it was kinder to kill it and put it out of it’s misery or to attempt to console it and bring it back to health.

Though clearly she was already doing the latter.

“ I told you. Tell me about them “ that came out a little lighter than she had initially meant. But she didn’t linger on it “ get it out. Probably won’t make them stop but. Might help “

You seemed to debate it, wiping at the tears on your cheeks and sighing.

She had to admit she was curious to know what was tormenting you. In the world they lived in there was plenty of things it could’ve been. They were 10 years in now and she still saw flashes of outbreak day in her dreams sometimes. Still remembered the first person she had seen infected. The first she had killed.

Death no longer bothered her. She had become numb to it in every way. Paths she had had no choice but to take, that had lead to her ending up that way. She did what she had to do to survive. But you seemed to still be coming to terms with the world around you.

You shuffled to move next to her, hanging your legs over the side of the bed with a small wince as you moved the ankle that was bandaged up.

“ me and a group. 9 of us? We were heading for the QZ. There was more of us at the start but… Pittsburgh is falling apart. A group of us snook out before it could get any worse. If that place lasts another year I’ll be surprised “ she’d heard of QZs falling apart all over the country. Boston was one of the only ones that FEDRA still had a relatively tight grip on “ we made it to the outskirts of the city… these runners came from no where and- “

She sat down on the edge of the bed as you tried to compose yourself a little, surprised to find her chest hurting a little as she watched you. Maybe it was because you seemed so… vulnerable. Somehow avoiding the hardships of the last ten years and behaving like the outbreak had only just begun.

She couldn’t help but feel inclined to protect you.

“ and how’d you end up at the bottom of that slope? “

“ me and 2 others. We made it pretty deep into the city, one of them said we should cut through the buildings. The road was fucked so I agreed. We got separated. Runners. Clickers. I just ran. Last thing I remember is the rain and and tryna get around the mess on the roads… guess I fell. Then you found me”

You’d escaped runners and clickers, and outlasted your entire group. You were really stronger than she thought. Vulnerable, yes, but still strong.

“ and that’s what you keep seeing? In your dreams? “ you nodded and sighed.

“ the others being ripped apart. Clickers chasing me. It’s so stupid I’m sorry. I’ll try to be quiet… I just wish they’d stop“ you dropped your head against her shoulder with a small sigh. Tess didn’t really know what to do. The gentleness of the act was almost alien to her now.

No one had been gentle with her for 10 years. Not even Joel.

You were doing something to her. Had done from the moment she’d seen you lying half dead on the floor outside. The fact that she had stopped at all. That she had brought you back. That in the 3 days you had been awake, the near constant 72 hours in your company, you had declared feeling safe with her. That you trusted her. That you looked at her and believed she could be gentle.

And Tess didn’t know how to react to it. What to do with it. She didn’t have a snarky remark to give you, simply out of fear of hurting your feelings or upsetting you. Which was ridiculous. Since when did she care about people’s feelings?

“ I promise I’ll try control it. Maybe you’re right. Maybe talking about it helped “

“ yeah. Maybe “

She had the sudden urge to tell you it’ll be okay. That she had nightmares too. That she’d lost count of the amount times she woke up in a cold sweat, images of her husband in a pool of his own blood flashing behind her eyelids, the sounds of her son fighting to escape the basement she had locked him in ringing in her ears.

Nothing haunted her more than that day. Everyone had their ghosts.

She didn’t even tell Joel but there she was wanting to tell you. To relate. To console.

She stood up before she could. Clearing her throat and heading for the door. She needed to get out of that apartment.

“ where are you going? “ the look on your face was like that of a kicked puppy, eyes wide and sad. She really needed to get out of that apartment.

“ I have shit to do. Stay quiet. Don’t open the door. I’ll be back in a few hours “ she pulled on her boots as she spoke, grabbing her bag and heading out the door in a hurry.

She needed to get back out among people that feared her. People that knew how dangerous she could be. Just to remind herself she was feared. She was dangerous. She wasn’t soft.

She. Didn’t. Care.

The fourth night was the same. She woke up to the clock on the wall showing 3:30am, you screaming at the top of your lungs and begging for help.

She got up from her makeshift bed on the couch and headed for the kitchen to get you some water, in the way that was becoming routine now. Usually by the time she reached you you’d stopped, but not tonight. You were thrashing around in the sheets, eyes still clenched tightly closed as you sobbed and screamed.

She placed the water down, her brows furrowed and sat herself on the edge of the bed. She grabbed at your arms to stop your thrashing before you hurt yourself

“ hey! You’re okay, look at me come on. Sweetheart, look at me. Just a dream. C’mon now “ your eyes flung open, terror swirling in your dilated pupils “ that’s it. Look around. You’re awake. You’re safe. You’re safe “

Clearly talking about it hadn’t helped. If anything it had made it worse.

“ no! Please- no! “

“ you gotta be quiet. Look. At. Me! “ she grabbed at your face, forcing your wild eyes to focus on her instead “ that’s it. Look at me. You see me? Not a fuckin clicker. No mushrooms in sight. You were dreamin again “ you seemed to register her words, slowly calming down as you took in her face in front of you.

“ Tess “ you whispered it with such relief, like some kind of wish in a prayer had been granted.

“ yeah. That’s right. It’s me “ you leaned into her touch, apparently grounding yourself again against the feel of her hands against your cheek. She watched you intently, the way you had known her for such little time but so clearly found comfort in her. In her touch.

She wondered if you knew the things she were capable of… if you knew the things she had done. Would you be so willing to sit there with her like that?

She let go of you and stood up.

“ no “ you said suddenly, fingers wrapping around her wrist as she attempted to return to the couch “ sorry I- “ she looked down at your hand, the way you held onto her “ I mean- can you. Could you… would you… stay? Here. With me “ she didn’t quite know why the word ‘ yeah ‘ flew into her mouth before she could even think about what you’d said. But she stopped it before it could escape “ please Tess. I’m so scared… I’d feel better if you were here “

“ I’m just around the other side of the wall “

“ please. You make me feel safe “ that took her aback. She didn’t have a single idea how to respond to that. Safe. She made you feel safe.

People didn’t feel safe around her. They felt afraid. They felt submissive to her power, they begged for their life, they felt dependent on her for their pills. They didn’t feel… safe.

But hadn’t that been what she had been trying to achieve? Hadn’t she wanted to make you feel safe. That you could exist around her and not be scared she’d hurt you. And it felt different yes, but. It felt nice too.

“ okay “ it came out far less confident than she’d wanted it to and she cleared her throat, trying to shake off the clearly obvious confusion she was experiencing “ yeah. Yeah. I’ll stay if you want “ you closed your eyes in relief and gave her a small smile, letting go of her wrist.

She watched you pull back the covers beside her and she got in, keeping a nice distance between you both. She had to admit it felt nice to be back in her bed. It wasn’t the most comfortable of things but anything was better than the couch for another night.

It felt strange laying next to someone though. She hadn’t done that for a long. Long. Time. Even when she had made her way through her string of flings and one time things, she hardly ever brought them back to her apartment. And they never slept in her bed if she did bring anyone back. She never let anyone invade her space. That felt too personal.

And yet there you were. In her bed. In her clothes. Finding herself annoyingly thinking about how much better that T-shirt looked on you than it did on her. And trying to ignore how unbelievably normal it felt having you there now. Even more so how normal and comfortable she was having you sleeping beside her.

She turned on her side to look at you, see how at peace you now looked. Your face no longer screwed up in terror, or eyes flashing wildly around the room. The only evidence of your dream the dried tear marks along your cheeks.

She reached out before she could stop herself, wiping at them softly with her fingers. There was a small scar on your left cheek below your eye, she let her finger trace it and wondered how you’d gotten it. She had too many scars to count now. Her face littered with nicks and dotted with freckles from the sun. She wondered if the face she was looking at now had changed in 10 years. If the face you now owned had looked different before the world fell apart.

She instinctively tried to pull away when your hand suddenly moved, placing it over hers gently and holding it in place.

She waited for the embarrassment to come, to ramble some excuse and probably excuse herself back to the couch. But your eyes remained closed, maybe in fear of embarrassing her. Whatever it was. She was grateful. And she let you hold her there, her hand still cupping your face as she fell asleep herself.

“ alright. Come here come look at these “ Tess broke the comfortable silence that had settled over the apartment for the last few hours, drawing your attention away from the book she had given you. She watched as you hopped your way over to the kitchen table, grabbing onto things to keep your balance whilst keeping your injured ankle off the floor.

She’d been working on papers for you for most of the day. Some half cooked insurance policy that made it look like you were a registered citizen if FEDRA happened to come knocking.

Even if they didn’t work entirely they’d still give her enough of a window to get you out before they returned again. And something was better than nothing she supposed.

“ FEDRA do random door to door checks, checking for infection “ she explained when you slumped into the chair next to her “ When they can fuckin be bothered to do it anyway… but if they do there’s a chance they’ll question why you’re here. This apartments only assigned to me, but as long as they think you’re registered it won’t matter. So. Fake papers. According to FEDRA your name is now Christine Hurley “ she didn’t mention that the real Christine Hurley was in fact in a ditch in one of the back alleys of area 2.

That the real Christine Hurley had thought trying to scam her and Joel with fake ration cards was a good idea, and had gotten a bullet in the forehead for her troubles.

“ and these will work? “

“ yeah. I make fake papers all the time to get me and Joel in and out of different areas. Should’ve been a forger pre outbreak. I’d have been rich as fuck” you laughed at that and she almost hated the way it made her heart skip. You were making her too fuckin soft and it was annoying. It was frustrating. She’d known you barely two weeks now, some of which you’d been unconscious, and yet you were making her soft. You were making her feel. Which was ridiculous

“ won’t they still question why I’m here?”

“ yeah but. They won’t really care. As long as you have papers they don’t give a shit. Found me with a girl here before. Idiot didn’t carry her papers with her. Arrested and… well fuck knows where she is now “ your face seemed to change ever so slightly at that and she wondered why “ just keep them with you”

“ you’ve had girls here before? What make a habit of rescuing people do you? “ she scoffed at that. Did she seem like the type to go around rescuing people every day?

“ no. She was here for… she was perfectly healthy. No rescuing “ it seemed to take you a moment before your eyebrows arched and you gave a nervous laugh.

“ oh “ she wasn’t embarrassed, she never had been when it came to sex or her enjoyment of it. She wondered if anyone else would’ve been. Maybe because you didn’t seem uncomfortable at the thought, in fact you seemed quite pleased about it. Something mischievous almost flashing in your eyes. “ interesting “

“ interesting? “

“ yeah. It’s interesting “ Tess raised an eyebrow but you simply shrugged, a smile tugging at your lips that you were seemingly trying and failing to suppress.

It didn’t seem mocking. More… knowing.

She changed the subject.

“ well. There’s your papers. Keep em with you “ you nodded and scanned over them, learning the new information about yourself whilst you were inside Bostons walls. Tess packed her stuff away and stood up, taking it over to the kitchen counter to hide it away in the small stash behind the back of one of the cupboards.

“ was she your girlfriend? “ Tess froze for a moment as you spoke, glancing slightly behind her to look at you. You were still looking down at the papers, like it was a casual topic to simply make conversation.

“ who? “

“ the girl. The one who didn’t have her papers “ she quirked an eyebrow and turned around , folding her arms across her chest and leaning back against the counter

“ why’d you ask? “

“ is that a yes “

“ it’s not “ you hummed a response, flipping the first page over to look at the other which listed all of the work assignments Christine had completed “ she wasn’t my girlfriend. I don’t… I don’t do girlfriends. Or boyfriends for that matter “

“ ahh. You’re one of those people. Alright “ you said, smiling down at the paper and clearly no longer reading it

“ what’s that supposed to mean? “

“ nothing bad. I’m just observing “ you finally looked up, sitting back in the chair with amusement on your face. It was a nice change from the sadness that seemed to be settling over your face every now and again “ let me guess. You get bored. Or lonely. So you go out, find a find a girl. Or a guy. Fuck them. Then leave them. That right? “

It was right. And she hated that you’d read her so easily.

“ no “ you scoffed at that

“ sure. But lemme ask you. Do you really feel less lonely? When you’re with them? Or is it something else? “ she didn’t like where this conversation was going. At all. Or the fact that it genuinely made her think. No. Of course it didn’t make her feel less lonely. If anything it simply made it worse

“ I’m not lonely. I’m better on my own “

“ I don’t think that’s true “

“ yeah. Well you know nothing about me” her words were a little harsh. Defensive. She didn’t want people knowing about her, didn’t need someone trying to figure her out.

“ but I want to know “ you didn’t seem shocked by her tone, or her words.

“ you don’t “ she didn’t want to tell you. She didn’t want to tell you about herself or reveal things about her.

Because it would only scare you off. She knew it.

“ hmmm. I do “ you smiled as you said it and she couldnt help the way it eased the tension brewing in her muscles “ you don’t have to tell me bad stuff. Just. Tell me fun stuff. I’m so starved of like… girl talk “ Tess scoffed

“ there were no girls in your group? “

“ there was two. One was a kid. And the other liked to grab me when her boyfriend pissed her off. Then tell me after it was totally a ‘ one time thing and she was literally so straight ‘ “ you said with a laugh and bending your fingers into air quotes.

“ oh I’ve known a few like that “ Tess found she didn’t actually mind that topic of conversation. Because it was something she was comfortable with and something she could control. And didn’t directly reveal anything about herself. So she sat herself back at the table with you.

“ so was I right then? You just fucking your way through the QZ for the fun of it? “

“ I wouldn’t exactly put it like that “

“ so how would you put it “ you leant forward, chin on your hand and a cheeky smile plastered across your face. You were loving it. And Tess did have to admit talking to someone other than Joel was a decent change.

“ the worlds a pile of shit. I won’t deny myself small pleasures “ your grin grew at that

“ bet you have them lining up for you huh? That scary thing you do… yeah. I bet the guys don’t like that though, you whip them into shape too? “ you said and wiggled your eyebrows in a way she couldn’t help but laugh at. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d really laughed.

“ I prefer women. They’re more interesting to look at “

“ agreed “ even before the outbreak she’d preferred girls. It was true, they were far more interesting, softer, squishier, easier to navigate. Prettier. She couldn’t help the way her eyes wandered over you, mind suddenly running wild. And from the look in your eyes, so was yours.

Two evidently touch starved people in such close proximity, with that topic of conversation was never going to end well.

And so she distanced herself before she could put herself in a compromising situation.

“ I have to go do some work. But I’ll be back soon “ she said and stood up, heading for the door and grabbing her backpack “ don’t- “

“ open the door. Make any sound. Draw any attention to myself. Yes ma’am “ you said, that grin still stuck on your face “ oh and don’t go bringing anyone else back here. You might make me jealous “ you looked back down at your papers then, leaving Tess’ mind still reeling as she opened the door and headed out.

—————————————————————

The nightmares came again that night, seemingly worse than the previous, leaving you in floods of tears after you woke up. And to Tess’ surprise you fell into her arms, clutching at her tshirt as you sobbed and sniffled. She felt her previous annoyance at being woken up fizzle away in an instant, replaced with a deep ache in her chest. Pain at seeing you so upset when you had been so happy during the day.

It concerned her slightly how much she enjoyed your smile. The way your eyes lit up around her. And how much she hated the tears and the sadness now plaguing your features.

“ you’re okay sweetheart. I’ve got you “ she said softly, tucking your head under her chin in a way that surprised her as your sobs turned to hiccups and sniffles. You were gripping her tightly, fingers twisted into the material of her shirt as if you were afraid she was about to push you away and leave you there.

Maybe if you had done that on night one she would’ve. It was strange how much had changed in days. How being around you practically 24/7 had changed her thoughts. She didn’t know if she liked it. if she liked how you seemed to be wiggling your way through the cold exterior of her heart, like a worm trying to reach the core of an apple. Burrowing through until it could reach the centre and stay there.

That almost did make her let you go.

She couldn’t have that. She couldn’t have herself worrying about someone else. Caring about someone else. That was dangerous. And you didn’t care for her. You didn’t worry. So why should she? Why should she allow herself the stupidity of getting into something so clearly one sided. And something she so clearly didn’t have control over. It scared her.

She felt like she was in a car that had had its breaks cut, hurtling towards a brick wall and she had no way of bringing it to a stop.

She really was getting soft. Ridiculously so. There she was sat at her table flicking through a faded and damaged medical book she’d traded for on the black market the previous day, so she could try and figure out how to get you back on your feet again.

She was reluctantly letting it happen now. Just accepting that she was doomed. That for the short time you would be with her she would allow herself this pathetic softness. And the second you were gone she would have her control back. It was all your fault. Yours completely. Luring her in to believe she could feel. To believe she was allowed to feel. To believe that someone could possibly feel for her.

It was stupid. So. Fucking. Stupid.

“ so I’m pretty sure just a super fuckin bad sprain. Says here… two weeks it’ll normally start feeling better. But can take up to eight to fully heal “ she said, clearing her throat in some attempt to distract her thoughts.

“ it does feel better than when I first woke up. So two weeks is accurate “ she placed the book down and went over to where you had your ankle up resting on a couch cushion. She peeled away the bandages she’d wrapped tightly around it to give it some support, pressing and poking slightly at the fading bruises.

“ can you move it? Wiggle your toes and shit? “ you did just that and she shrugged. She was no doctor. But she patched herself and Joel up enough over the years “ alright. c’mon. Up “ she held out her hands and you took them, they looked so soft and delicate compared to hers. A scar here and there but somehow mostly clear. Nothing compared to the scratches and scrapes on hers. The scars on her knuckles from the numerous times she’d split them open.

Hands like that didn’t fit together. Didn’t meet. Hands like hers didn’t deserve the privilege of touching hands like yours. Hands like hers didn’t deserve to touch anyone in a gentle way. They were for business. For hurting. For pain. Yours weren’t. Yours were soft. Smooth. Yours were made for caressing and soothing, for receiving soft kisses on the back.

She was losing it.

She guided one of your arms around her shoulders and helped you get your balance.

“ don’t try walk. Just. Just try put your weight on it “

“ what if- “

“ don’t worry. I’ve got you. Just be careful yeah? “ she watched you carefully as you gently placed your foot down, eyebrows furrowing as you did and hissing in pain through your teeth “ I said carefully “ you sighed and put it flat on the floor but still heavily leaning against her “ feels okay? “

“ hurts “ Tess nodded and held you tighter around the waist

“ try not to lean on me so much. You won’t fall over. I’ve got a hold of you “

“ oh you’re gonna catch me? “ you said with a small laugh, eyes flickering up to hers briefly. The tone of your voice made her throat a little dry and she couldn’t figure out exactly why.

“ yeah. Yeah I got you “ your face screwed up slightly as she watched you out more of your weight onto it and get used to the feeling.

She held you there for a couple of minutes to regain your balance before slipping your arm off of her and holding your hands in hers.

“ now try walk. Hold onto me “

“ I don’t think I- “

“ just try. Look at me “ you watched her face carefully as she took small steps back, helping you to get used to the feeling of the ankle being used again.

She was glad Joel had work assignments that day. She didn’t think she’d ever live it down if he turned up at her apartment and saw that. Saw her holding you so carefully and helping you walk again like a child.

But she found in the hour or so that she did it, her cheeks began to hurt from smiling. For once in her life feeling like the world wasn’t on her shoulders, happy. Smiling. You smiling with her.

It was nice.

“ you got it! Nice work sweetheart “ she watched the utter joy on your face as you managed to keep your balance on your own and walk before falling into her arms.

“ fuck yeah “ you laughed seemingly now exhausted from the small amount of work. But she didn’t blame you after so long unable to do anything “ can we rest now? “

“ we can do whatever you want “ she said with a small laugh, arms wrapped around you to keep you up right.

“ anything? “ you asked quietly, smile fading slightly and looking up at her intently. Tess furrowed her brows, slightly confused at what exactly you were asking her.

It took her completely by surprise when you leant up and kissed her. Standing practically shell shocked as you pressed your lips to hers. It was only a few seconds and then you were pulling back, cheeks flaming red and closing your eyes with a shake of your head

“ god I’m so- Tess I’m sorry I don’t know why I- “

“ you need to rest “ she said and cleared her throat, not wanting to think about had just happened for even a second. Not prepared to deal with the spiral it would inevitably send her down.

All she knew. Was that she was fucked. well. And truly. Fucked.

“ just stay close to me. Try not to talk to anyone. And don’t touch anything“ Tess instructed as she pushed back a palette keeping one of the exits out of the tunnels covered

“ yes ma’am “ you said with a smile and a mock salute, following her through the gap and standing patiently as she dragged the palette back into place “ will there be officers? “

“ maybe. But the ones around here are just as bad as the smugglers. They’re some of our best customers for pills. Turns out sending people to the gallows everyday can fuck you up. Who’d have guessed? Just do as I say “ you stood ridiculously close to her, eventually wrapping your fingers around her wrist as you both entered the courtyard. She wasn’t in the mood to loiter and headed straight for the people she needed. Trading off cards for boots, a new jacket, some shirts and jeans.

Stuff you’d need. That she didn’t have a surplus of.

Ration cards were as precious as gold those days. And she was spending her hard earned ones on you. She definitely wouldn’t telling Joel about that.

She found she didn’t mind though. She wanted you to be prepared. Safe. And the boots she’d found you in barely had any soles left. You wouldn’t get far in those.

It had been a week since you’d kissed her and neither of you had mentioned it since. Falling back into that comfortable thing you’d been developing before. Where you could make her laugh and smile. And you would tease her for being too grumpy which would make you smile.

It was odd how normal it was starting to feel having you around. But she always ruined the moment by thinking about the future. About how empty her apartment would feel when you leave. She’d gotten used to you. And she almost didn’t want to let you go.

Maybe she could work something out, wrap some officers around to her thinking and get you some official papers. She could train you up to help her with her smuggling, show you the ropes and tell you who the best people to deal with were. And who to avoid like the plague.

It could be nice.

“ Tess. Haven’t seen you around for a few days. Where you been hiding? “ she felt you tense beside her as one of the FEDRA officers on her client list made his way towards her. He was a cocky son of a bitch, one who constantly tried to make her lower her prices and was notoriously known for being too heavy handed with the girls he paid for. And had been trying to get his way into her pants for months. Seemingly thinking offering her his dick was worth a half price deal on his pills.

“ don’t. Speak. Let me do the talking “ Tess said in a low voice close to your ear, looking like she was entirely too fascinated by the piles of clothes in front of her “ I’m not selling today Marcus. You know I don’t get shit until the end of the month “

“ I know. I know. Cant I be friendly and say hello? “ she rolled her eyes, hoping he’d just fuck off and leave her be now that he knew she didn’t have what he wanted “ who’s the new pet? Following you around like a little lost puppy? “ you shuffled closer to her if that was even possible, fingers tightly gripping at her wrist.

“ that’s none of your concern “

“ pretty thing “ he said with a smirk, craning his head to try and look at where you were attempting to hide behind her. She surprised herself for the millionth time since she’d found you, when she felt a burning jealousy in her chest. She didnt like the thought of anyone talking about you. Even looking at you. Thinking about you. Which was fuckin. Stupid. But she hated it “ maybe you come give me a visit when she’s done with you huh? “

“ I don’t think so “ her voice was bitter, unable to stop herself from appearing as jealous as she was

“ what? Cant she speak for herself? Come on Tess. It’s nice to share “

“ not this one “ she freed her wrist from your grasp and draped her arm around your shoulder instead, pulling you against her body. You sighed a slight sigh of relief at the contact, pressing yourself against her. She tossed down some more cards for the clothes and handed them to you “ put ‘em in your bag “ you did as you were told, the slightly worried expression that had been on you face still there. But a little less now she had a hold of you.

“ settling down? You’re not the type. You send her my way when you get bored. I’ll be waiting. I’ll even pay you double on my next batch “ Tess scoffed and turned to face him, trying to ignore the burning anger boiling away in her chest at the thought of him anywhere near you.

She saw the state he left some girls in, the thought of that happening to you was enough to make her want to put a bullet through his head in the middle of the courtyard.

“ you know that’s not my game “ he shrugged and raised his hands in mock surrender “ go talk to Robert he’ll point you in the right direction. But this one? She’s mine. So back the fuck off. And come find me at the end of the month for your shit. Okay? “ she enjoyed the way that even the officers listened when she commanded it, that the simple tone of voice and the reputation she was gaining was enough to make anyone do as she said.

“ alright alright. Stay out of trouble “ he said with another smirk, but not as smug as it previously had been “ and you “ he said, throwing a wink at you and walked away.

“ let’s get you home yeah? “ she said it loud enough that she hoped Marcus heard it. That you were going back with her. Not him. Never him.

“ yes please “ she could feel your eyes burning into her as you walked back, almost tripping up because you weren’t paying attention to where you were walking.

You seemed flustered. Frantic almost. She wondered if Marcus had shaken you up, overwhelmed you.

She couldn’t have been more wrong if she’d tried. Once you both got back into her apartment she realised what had gotten into you.

You grabbed at her arm when she closed the door, yanking at her with a confidence she hadn’t seen from you before. You pulled her close and to her surprise yet again, you kissed her. For the second time. It was a lot more confident than the first, more… desperate. Your lips pressing harder against hers than she’d expected.

She found herself kissing you back that time, turning you around and crowding you back against the door. She knew she shouldn’t haven given in, shouldn’t be letting her desire her in the way of what she knew was right and wrong.

But she couldn’t help herself.

Maybe it was the pent up jealousy and anger from down in the market, kissing you being the safest form of release for it. And the most enjoyable. Not that battering the fuck out of Marcus wouldn’t have been thoroughly enjoyable. But making out with you? It beat anything else by miles.

It made her regret not kissing you back the first time, when your lips felt like that against hers. Tasted like that. It felt cruel to have denied herself of it.

It was the feel of your fingers gently pushing at her shirt that snapped her back into reality, made her see some common sense again.

“ hey. Hey we can’t “ she said softly, hands soothing over your arms and closing her eyes for a moment. She sighed and looked at you, your cheeks flushed “ we can’t “ she didn’t explain herself. Couldn’t. Couldn’t tell you that she was getting far too attached. That sleeping with you could well and truly be the final nail in the coffin that she was burying herself in.

“ I’m sorry “ you said, clearly embarrassed. Tess couldn’t tear her eyes away from your lips. Parted and glossy with saliva. She wanted to kiss you again.

“ it’s okay. Don’t sweat it “ she looked away before she could.

“ just. The way you were out there. With that officer and and the way you spoke about me I- god “ she found a smile tugging at her lips as she watched your flustered attempt to explain, groaning and putting your head in your hands. She nudged her fingers under your chin to make you look at her, noticing the way your breath shuddered slightly. You were so easy to work up.

“ don’t be embarrassed “ she could practically see you melting under her gaze, the low tone of her voice and intense gaze making you look ready to drop to your knees. And wouldn’t that be a sight.

A sight she had to remind herself she did not need to see.

“ go empty your bag, take a shower or something i don’t know about you but that market makes me feel grimy as fuck. Then we won’t talk about it. Yeah?” You nodded your head and gave her a warm smile

“ yeah “ she stepped away from you, watching you head for the bathroom and close the door behind you. She ran a hand over her face, a deep sigh shuddering past her lips. What was she doing?

Usually she would’ve kept going. Would’ve happily fucked you and been fine about it. She was no stranger to doing just that and then moving on. But there was something about you. Something about the anger she had felt around Marcus, the jealousy and the possessiveness.

Even the fact that she was still sharing a bed with you. And most nights now she’d wake up to find you pressed against her. Cuddling like a couple as if it were the most normal thing. That she enjoyed waking up to your smile, your eyes. You.

What had you done to her?

“ I think you’re gonna have to go soon “ the realisation of the fact had hit her like a ton of bricks that morning. Or maybe it had been sooner than that and she had been forcing herself to ignore it.

Your lack of reaction told her you probably knew that.

Staying with her had never been a permanent thing. But she felt she was pushing her luck now, the fact you had managed to stay as long as you had was a miracle in itself.

“ they found a whole group of unregistered people in an apartment in area 3 the other day. FEDRAS upping their random checks and… look I’m good at fake papers but they can only do so much. If they find out you’re not a registered citizen they’ll have you up on the gallows before you can even tell them your real name “ she ran a hand over her face with a deep sigh “ and I can’t fuckin see that happen to you sweetheart I can’t “

You didn’t say anything right away, which she hated. It meant that her words hung there in the silence for a little too long. Gave her that minute too long to think about them and wish she could yank them back and shove them back down her throat.

Then your hand tentatively reached out for hers that was on the table, fingers ghosting over her knuckles before gently squeezing in what she assumed was your attempt at reassuring her.

“ I never thought I’d even make it into Boston and with your help I wouldn’t have. I thought you’d kick me out the moment I’d woken up. I never expected you to let me stay as long as you have and put yourself in a position… I’m trying to say thank you I guess. And that… I know… I know you wouldn’t tell me to go unless I really had to “

She glanced up at you and couldn’t quite read the expressions on your face. It annoyed her still. How she couldn’t get a grasp on you, couldn’t get into your head in the way she could with others. But that didn’t matter anymore did it. You were leaving.

“ I know this couple in a town not too far from here. That’s where I was coming from when I found you… Bill and Frank. I spoke to Frank last night on the radio and he said you can go there for a few days. They have more supplies than you can fuckin imagine they’ll give you what you need. Franks real good with the radio he’s gonna listen in, see what he can hear and find you a QZ that’s letting people in “ you nodded and gave her a small smile

“ how do I get there? “

“ I’ll take you “ there was never any question in that. You’d almost died on your way in. Never mind the way out. You nodded, processing the information.

Talking to Frank on the radio the previous night has been hard but now she was discussing with you it made it feel far too real. The stark realisation that you wouldn’t be in the room after tomorrow. You wouldn’t be in her bed, smiling at her when you woke up, loudly commenting on the book you were reading when a character did something you didn’t like. Just your presence .

“ c’mere for a second “ you rose to your feet instantly walking over to her and standing between her legs. She ran her hands gently along your legs and looked up at you, her gaze soft “ I’ll make sure you get there safe. I promise you Bill and Frank will help you out “

You straddled her thighs, looping your arms around her neck and pressing your forehead to hers. It felt too… romantic. Intimate. It felt exactly what she had been so terribly trying to avoid. but maybe she was stupid for ever thinking she could live with you and be around you so constantly and not end up in such a position. You were like a siren luring her in, filling her senses and overwhelming her with desire no matter how hard she attempted to fight it. No one would’ve been able to resist you. No one.

“ I’m gonna miss you “ you whispered, so close your lips brushed hers as you spoke “ I’m gonna miss your stupid face “ Tess chuckled at that.

“ stupid? “

“ mhm. So stupid “

“ so stupid you try kiss me any chance you fuckin get? “ it was the first time you’d both actually mentioned either of the kisses out loud. But she guessed it didn’t matter if it made things awkward now.

You were leaving. What did she have to lose.

“ I have a head injury I don’t think my thought process can be trusted “

“ it can’t “ you twisted a lock of her dark hair around your finger, another thing that felt casually intimate.

“ I guess I cant be blamed then. Cant be blamed for this either “ she refused to let her fears get the better of her that time. Taking the chance whilst she still had it, kissing you back with the same gentleness you were. It felt bittersweet. Nothing could be bad about kissing you, but the knowledge she might never get to kiss you again? That was painful.

“ I’m really gonna miss you “ you whispered once you pulled away, short breaths hitting Tess’ lips.

“ yeah sweetheart. I’ll miss you too “

Tess hadn’t anticipated the heavy feeling in chest on the last night with you in her apartment. Unable to sleep and simply staring up at the ceiling as you lay curled up beside her.

She reminisced on the weeks you’d spent with her. How much you’d managed to wiggle into her heart and make her feel things she thought she’d forgotten.

She felt stupid. But it was okay. You would be gone that time tomorrow, she would drink. She would forget. She would carry on. She would go back to normal. She tried to ignore the small voice in the back of her head telling her that wasn’t what she wanted now. But she had no choice.

She startled as your hand moved, sliding over her arm with a soft sigh

“ cant sleep either? “ she looked down to see your eyes wide awake and watching her. She’d miss the way you looked at her. Admired her. Never afraid.

“ no “ she turned onto her side, reaching out to tuck your hair away from your face “ it’s gonna be weird when you’re gone “ she confessed in a whisper, almost hoping it was too quiet for you to hear. It wasn’t of course.

“ yeah. I got used to looking at your grumpy face everyday “ she huffed a small laugh and rolled her eyes “ maybe I can write or something when I find a new QZ. Send radio messages. I don’t know. Something “

“ yeah. Maybe “ that would only hurt you both more she was certain of it. But she wouldn’t tell you that now. She’d let you hope and think of something good that the future may hold “ do you wanna try get some more sleep? “

“ No I can’t “ you said with a shake of your head and shuffled a little closer to her “ I can think of something to pass the time time though “ Tess smiled and slipped her hand around to the back of your neck

“ funny. So can I “ she pulled you towards her, capturing your lips with hers and pulling a soft sigh from you as she did. She regretted not kissing you more. Regretted not giving in to her thoughts whilst she’d had you, some half ditched attempt to protect herself. As if it still wouldn’t hurt.

You kissed different than anyone else she’d been with. Which sounded cheesy and she felt stupid for thinking it. But it was true. Girls that were being overly dramatic to try and get paid more or girls that were just like her. Lonely and looking for some form of human contact.

But you were… invested. Kissing her like you actually meant it. Tender and careful, soft moans into her mouth that were slowly working her up.

“ I thought of. Of something else. That. We could do. More than…kissing “ you whispered in between soft kisses “ if you want “ she didn’t need to second guess or even give it a single second of thought. You were leaving tomorrow whether she or you liked it or not. So what did she have to lose now? Nothing.

And who was she to deny herself of such pleasure in world full of a whole lot of pain. Especially now. Especially with you.

She pushed at you, placing her body on top of yours and caging your head between her arms, not giving you a second to even attempt to take control from her. Not that she thought she would really. Not when you had been so willing to do as exactly as you’d been told the entirety of your stay with her.

She felt ever so slightly out of practice. It wasn’t a lack of experience, Jesus if anything she had too much experience. Which she wasn’t entirely proud of but who the fuck cared? The world was ending. Had ended. She’d take any small ounce of pleasure she could seek out. You didn’t seem like the type for that. She couldn’t picture you slinking around in the less desirable areas picking up girls just because she wanted something- or rather someone- to do.

No. You seemed too… pure. For that. Tess wasn’t pure. Not at all. But she could pretend. She could pretend if that’s what you wanted. Though she wasn’t entirely sure it was. Not with the way your hands were grabbing at her, hands restless as they slipped under the hem of her shirt to touch her skin.

She kissed you until she had no choice but to pull away to breathe, immediately moving to your neck instead. Your skin was like a blank canvas and she was going to take great joy in marking it.

“ Tess “ you practically whimpered her name, pushing at her tshirt in some silent request to get it off. But she’d be damned if she was gonna let you get her naked first. Her fingers worked at the button up you’d gone to bed in, still working at your neck as she did. She hadn’t really liked the shirt on herself, so had happily let you take it when you’d picked it out. But on you? She almost didn’t want to take it off you completely. There was something about the thought of fucking you in her clothes…

She had to sit up to admire the view, reluctantly detaching her lips from your soft skin.

“ fuck “ she couldn’t help it, it left her mouth without her consent. The sight of you was enough to ruin her for life. Her shirt open and revealing your heaving chest, the blush creeping across your cheeks and the blossoming marks on your neck… oh she was fucked.

She reached out, grabbing at your tits and sighing heavily at how heavenly your body was. You’re back arching into her touch as she moulded the squishy flesh beneath her fingers, dropping her head down again to get her mouth on you too.

She was like a greyhound chasing a rabbit. Tunnel vision and a singular end goal, you the only thing in her sight. In her mind. Desperate to touch and taste and fill her senses with nothing other than you.

“ oh god “ you whined as she flattened her tongue, licking across your nipple and testing your reaction. She knew you’d be whiny. Knew you’d be someone she could work into a whimpering mess with ease.

She had a knack for knowing these things.

“ you’re fuckin beautiful “ she said as she rolled a nipple between her fingers, peppering kisses across your chest as she did “ so fuckin beautiful “ she was stupid to think she’d be able to forget you with a bottle of whiskey. How on earth would she ever get the image of you underneath her out of her mind.

You squirmed around beneath her, small sighs and whimpers escaping past your lips when she grazed her teeth against your skin. Your fingers lacing into her hair and scratching your blunt nails against her scalp.

She didn’t let herself get side tracked for too long, she had an end goal to reach that resulted in her head happily between your thighs. And with the sounds you were already making and the way you were squirming around, she got the picture you were more than ready for that.

She moved back up to be level with your face, kissing you again and letting her hands wander. Mapping out your body with her fingers so she could commit the thought to memory.

“ please Tess. I need you. God I need you just- please “ you whimpered into her mouth, raising your hips up against her in desperation. If you had been anyone else she’d have denied you. Made you beg and edged you until she was bored “ I waited weeks don’t make me wait any longer “

But she couldn’t do that to you. How could she possibly deny you of anything you wanted from her? When you were underneath her looking like that, making sounds like that.

“ weeks huh? “

“ yes “ that made her feel pretty fucking smug. But also made her feel slightly less stupid for… whatever it was she was feeling for you.

So she didn’t waste any time. Moving down your body after another kiss to your swollen lips.

She pulled your underwear down your legs soothing her hands over your thighs before pushing them apart. Making a point to leave the shirt on. Part of her felt like she shouldn’t be rushing. But she was desperate to taste you.

The noise that left your mouth when she parted you with her tongue was heavenly, she felt addicted in an instant. She wanted to hear it again. Over and over. She never wanted to hear a single other sound for the rest of her life. It paired with the look on your face had a small shuddering breath passing her own lips, in complete and utter awe of you.

She had wanted to draw it out, to have you writhing and whimpering and wreck you for anyone else. But the sounds you were making and the blissful look in your eyes… she was desperate to make you come. Desperate to see what you’d look like, what sounds that would draw out of you. Maybe it was a little selfish, but she didn’t care.

Your taste flooded her tongue and she was like a starving woman eating for the first time in days. She was feral.

Her arms looped around your thighs to keep you in place and she went to town. She wanted to feel you coming on her tongue, wanted to see the exact look on your face, know the taste.

She felt like she could stay there for hours. Days. Weeks. Trapped between the pillowy flesh of your thighs, senses flooded with you. Your taste on her tongue, your moans in her ears, soft skin beneath her fingers.

Your fingers pulled at her hair, whining her name in a way that made a smug smile creep its way onto her face.

“ you know it’s… it’s been a while so- “ you attempted to form a sentence, gasping and arching your back in between your words “ I don’t think I’ll last- fuck Tess “ that was practically music to her ears. And a lively boost to the ego that she had you on edge already.

“ that’s okay sweetheart, you wanna come for me? Yeah? “ you eyes were screwed shut and you nodded quickly, pushing her face closer to your cunt again which made her smile “ I got you”

It was only another minute or so until you were pulling almost painfully at her hair, holding on for dear life as you came on her tongue. You were stronger than she’d expected, managing to trap her head with your thighs even with her holding them, keeping her in place until your body went slack and she she came up gasping for air. With the biggest fucking smug grin on her face.

She looked up at you from her spot between your legs, admiring the blissful look on your face, the droplets of sweat along your sternum, her shirt still hanging open on you.

She made her way back up to your lips with a trail of kisses. Wet, soft, open mouthed kisses that made goosebumps rise on your skin.

“ you good? “ she asked, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips

“ good doesn’t even cut it “ she laughed as you beamed a smile, open your eyes to look up at her “ I wanted you to do that after the market “

“ I know you did “ she’d wanted to do it too. But she’d stopped herself like the idiot she clearly was. She moved to lay beside you, still watching you closely. She wanted to remember every detail of you. No matter how painful it would be. She wanted to remember.

“ you know what else I wanna do? “ you said, shuffling closer and trailing your hand along her waist and across the front of her. She grabbed at your hand before you could move it any closer, effectively stopping you in your tracks

“ please let me “ you whispered, eyes wide and glassy looking up at her like she was the last woman on earth. She wasn’t used to being looked at like that. Even with you. Even with you who had never looked at her with anything but some seemingly deep rooted adoration and affection. Never fear.

“ you don’t have to “ it was rare she let anyone reciprocate. She didn’t like the way it made her feel so… exposed. Vulnerable. Like some baby animal being lured into a lions den ready to be mauled to death.

You reached up with your other hand, gently brushing her dark hair away from her face and behind her ear. She didn’t entirely know how to react. She didn’t now what to do with such tenderness. It made her brain flash with an error code like some janky 90s PC. Her mind coming up blank when confronted with such care and compassion.

“ I know I don’t have to. But I want to. Please “ she was used to people wanting to please her. She could have any fucker running doing whatever she asked if she dangled a bag of pills in front of them, like donkeys working for carrots. But someone wanting to please her like that? To give simply because they felt like that, to not expect a single thing in return.

She didn’t know how to respond. Simply looked at you in silence. You seemed to see the cogs coming to a grinding halt in her head, eyes flickering over her face.

“ you’ll let me Tess? “ she still didn’t really now what to say. And it was starting to piss her off. She always knew what to say. She always knew what to do. But not with you.

You pushed lightly at her shoulder, urging her to lay on her back. And to her own surprise she found herself doing it, head falling against the pillow and your face re appearing above hers. That alone felt a little wrong. She never let anyone on top. Ever. Never sacrificed that power to anyone.

“ after all you’ve done for me “ you whispered against her lips, nudging your nose to hers “ you deserve something in return. Let me make you feel as good as you made me feel “ she could feel small tendrils of panic starting to wind their way up into her chest, twisting around her ribs and tightening. So she took back some control, hand slipping to the back of your neck and pulling you down to kiss her as hard as she could manage.

She knew you weren’t about to do anything bad. But it was simply the act of letting someone have her so vulnerable to them. It terrified her.

“ trust me “ you whispered in between kisses “ you trust me don’t you? “

“ yeah “ she surprised herself with how quickly she said it, how unbelievably certain she was of the fact. That she did trust you. In the weeks since you’d woken up she’d grown to trust you as much as she’d trust Joel. Maybe she was stupid for that.

She took a sharp intake of breath as your hand pushed past her underwear, fingers dipping into the wetness between her folds and softly circling her clit.

“ see, you’re wet. Pretty proud of myself for that “ you were trying to lighten the mood and it helped a little. A small smile trying to creep its way onto her face.

She was used to her own fingers and only her fingers. But yours were something else. Those soft gentle hands that she had felt looked so out of place in an apocalypse, felt like velvet. You watched her face intently and she almost felt embarrassed, it was odd for her. To be so exposed and so closely observed.

You slipped your fingers inside of her with ease, her eyes falling closed as she attempted to steady her breathing from the intrusion. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d let someone do that, she’d forgotten how it felt. It was nothing like how it felt to do it herself.

You were reaching places she never could, breathy sounds escaping her even when she tried to stop them.

“ I wish you could see what you looked like right now “ your voice was almost awe filled, like you were simply amazed the sight of her. Maybe you were

“ shut up “ she said, breathless, pulling you down to kiss her again in some attempt to change the subject. Not wanting the attention on herself, sinking her teeth into your bottom lip to make you whimper into her mouth again.

She figured she’d be done just as fast as you had been, especially when you seemed to know exactly where to touch. You hit some place devastating, the tight knot in her belly growing and growing

“ fuck. Stay right fuckin there “ she gasped, fingers gripping your wrist as you did as she’d asked. Focussing on the same spot over and over again. She kept her eyes on you. Kneeling over her, in her shirt, the sight alone was enough to finish her off.

She pulled you down to her mouth again, scared she’d do something embarrassing like make noise, kissing you as she came on your fingers. Holding you firmly in place as her walls convulsed around you and her body rushed with heat, every muscle tensing before going limp and leaving her feeling like a rag doll.

She was breathless as she let you go, her skin on fire and prickling with heat.

“ well fuck me “ she mumbled. Throwing an arm over her eyes for a moment and to her surprise, laughing. You giggled beside her laying down and slinging a leg over hers, both your skins slippery with sweat. But she didn’t care.

“ I just did didn’t I? “ you said in the most innocent tone, simply making her laugh again. You both settled into a comfortable silence then, lazily kissing until you dropped your head.

As you both lay there, your head resting on her chest and hand over her heart, she almost wanted to cry. Which was fucking stupid. She didn’t cry. That wasn’t her.

“ you know you’re still gonna have to leave “ she whispered “ it’s not safe for you to stay here “ she felt your breathing stutter slightly and she knew you were crying. But she didn’t mention it. Didn’t want to embarrass you or risk making herself cry too by acknowledging it “ you know you still have to go “You gave a small nod. You knew. You knew this was always going to be the outcome, both of you did.

“ yeah. I know “ she was silent for a few minutes before gently pushing at your body, urging you to turn on your side. She pressed herself against your back, her arms sliding gently over your waist and her nose nudging lightly at the back of your neck.

“ couple more hours “ she whispered against your skin “ couple more hours. Then I’ll take you to the wall… couple more “ you rested your hand over hers and nodded again, tears welling in her eyes as you did. She refused to let them fall. She wasn’t that pathetic.

“ couple more hours “ you echoed softly, voice barely above a whisper in some attempt to hide the evident crack in your tone as you seemingly failed at keeping the tears in “ just a couple more “

#this took ridiculousy long to transfer but here you go #tess servopoulos x reader #tess servopoulos #tess tlou #the last of us #tlou #the last of us fanfic #x you #smut #fluff #Anna torv #other characters for exposure: #Joel miller #Ellie Williams #Tommy miller

[loubouskz]

I'm used to it

mafia!bang chan x vet!reader

description: you come home to see your best friend and roommate, felix, is not home yet. not unusual...til it hit 4am. your worries were answered when you heard banging coming from the front door. only open the door and have a lot change in a short amount of time.

warnings: mafia!skz, two gun fight scenes(one major & one minor), reader has and anxiety attack & passes out, wound & blood to one character, pet names(mainly sweeheart), smut, unprotected sex, oral(fem & male receiving), shower sex, out in the open during oral so slight exhibition, dirty talk

wc: 6,000+

a/n: i forgot i had this in my google docs. I finished writing this month's ago and remember thinking it wasn't that good. reading it back now, I think it's pretty good, plus it's the first fanfic that has 6,000 words. but this was my first time trying to write gun/mafia...those kind of things so it may not be so good in those areas.

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coming home to an empty apartment was a common occurrence due to lee felix, my best friend and roommate, having a busy schedule at work. I too, have a busy schedule that makes me come home from 11pm to 1am, depending on what’s happening. today I came home at 12am, exhausted from working with animals all day. but this time it was strange, he didn’t text me like he usually does so I don’t worry myself out. I just thought to myself, ‘he most likely just got caught up and forgot to text.’ it happens every now and then, but it was very rare. I changed out of my nurse clothes and put on my favorite hoodie and sweats. I grabbed a snack from the kitchen and watched a random movie that was on tv. 

by the time it was over with an empty bowl next to me, it was pitch black and almost 4am. I opened my phone, hoping to see a text from him. nothing. he’s never been out this late before. I quickly being to dial his number and brought it up to my ear. hearing it ring, over and over and over again, but no answer. “come on, lix. answer the phone.” I said, trying it again. still no answer. I got up from the couch and pacing back and forth. it’s not like him to just let the phone ring, he’ll either send it to voicemail or send an automatic message that he can’t talk right now..

I tried to call felix for a 3rd time, by now the clock was reading 4:23am. I would go to his work to check on him, but we share the car, since we live so close to where I work- so I walk. bang chan, the man who is a one mean workaholic. I’ve met him a few times, along with some of felix’s other co-workers. he has a cold exterior, but warms up to certain people, especially the boys that work for him. I just think his a dick, making all of them work such long godforsaken hours. a really good looking, attractive dick. him and I only got along because of felix making us. sometimes I wish I could just smack him.

I shook my head as I remembered I had his number. ‘for real emergencies only, do not call me to talk. okay sweetheart.’ I heard his voice ring in my head. I rolled my eyes and hesitantly clicked the call button, hoping he would answer. it went straight to voicemail. “what the fuck!” I said, trying not to yell too loudly as the walls of my apartment are VERY thin. I tried felix once more, before going to my room. still no answer. I let out a frustrated sigh, trying to calm myself down. maybe I could walk to his job. yeah right, its on the other side of the fucking town. that would take all day to get there. I sat on my bed and tried to call felix for the nth time, but pounding from the front door stopped me. I shot up and ran to the door, hoping it when felix.

I opened the door to a horror scene you’d see in the movies. there was felix, looking half dead, bleeding from his side with his arm slung around chan, who was covered in blood as well but seemed fine. chan had a sheer look of pain on his face as he pushed his way through me into my apartment. I backed up, not saying anything out of pure shock.

“close the goddamn door, y/n!” chan yelled as he headed to felix’s bedroom. I jumped at his voice and closed the door quickly. I ran to them and stopped in the doorway of the bedroom, watching chan remove felix’s bedsheets then felix’s shirt. chan laid felix on the bed and turned to me. “don’t you have a med kit here, go get it.” chan demanded. I went to the bathroom closet and pulled out the med kit and ran back to chan. I entered the room and went over to felix, seeing the nasty open wound up close. “what happened to him?” I asked, looking at chan. 

“not the time! just patch him up fast, we have to go!" chan said, pulling out a gun from his waistband. my eyes widened, flicking back and forth from him and the gun. “chris, he needs a doctor!” I said, raising my voice at him as he tried to leave the room. he stopped in the doorway, gave me a death look for saying his other name. "do not call me that right now y/n, I’m serious. you know how to stitch right?" he said all in a hushed voice. "yeah! on animals, i'm a vet!" I said back at him.

"just hurry, stitch and patch him up! we don't have much time right now!" chan said as he exited the room. I looked down at felix and pushed his hair out of his face. “lix, did he do this to you?” i asked quietly. he shook his head, “no, he didn’t. I promise. but right now, just listen to what he says okay?” he said weakly. I nodded my head as I opened the med kit and grabbing the gloves to put on. hopefully it won’t be to much different stitching up, I prayed. I began to work on felix as quickly and carefully as I could. “I’m gonna be okay y/n. it won’t be the first time.” felix laughed out, before coughing at bit. “shh, just stay silent for now lix.” I said, looking into his eyes for a brief moment. 

chan entered the door again along with someone new, who also had a gun in his hand. “you almost done?” chan asked, coming up behind me. I nodded my head, not wanting to stop what I was doing. the new guy ran out of the room before quickly coming back. “chan, they can’t hold them off any longer. we have to go.” the guy said as I placed the patch on felix’s now closed up wound. I taped it down and sat back once I was done. “I’m finished.” I said, looking up at chan. chan looked over at the guy, “get him and take him to the car.” he said. the guy came over and picked felix up and quickly left the room. 

chan was about to leave but noticed I was still sat on the floor. he grabbed my arm and pulled me with him. “come on. we gotta go, sweetheart.” he said as we rushed to the front door. he let go of my arm so I could slip back on my shoes. he opened the door and looked carefully outside and before exiting the apartment with the gun in his hands. he nodded his head for me to follow him. we went out the back staircase and down the back alley. “where are we going?” I asked, he didn’t answer me.

we were about to exit the alleyway, but as chan peeped around the corner and gunshot went off, making him jump back into me. I jumped and covered my ears with my eyes fully shut. oh, this has got to be a nightmare as I heard multiple shots start going off. I felt an arm go around my waist and pull me into them. “stay close to me.” chan whispered in my ear as he sandwiched me against the wall. wake up y/n, its all a bad dream. a very real dream. I felt my tears forming as I opened my eyes. chan carefully peeked his head out and shot his gun at whoever was shooting at us. he pulled back and looked at me, his hard stare softened as he noticed the state I was in.

“hey, you’re gonna be okay. I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.” he said softly. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest. “please get me out of here, I feel light-headed, gonna pass out.” I whispered as I felt numbness course through my body. “stay with me, y/n.” he said, as he held my body weight. “guys where are you?” chan asked into the air. I heard a slight voice coming over something, that’s when I noticed the ear piece. another round of shots started as a screeching sound of vehicle came to a stop. chan leaned out and shot a few more times, “come on, I got them!” I heard someone say, along with shots being fired. chan pulled back and looked at me, giving me a nod. like I knew what it meant. “we’re gonna run to the car, okay sweetheart.” he said, I nodded my head the best I could.

chan pulled us away from the wall, he moved me to the right side of him. I looked straight out and saw a big black van with a side door open, with one person out shooting and another holding out his hand. “ready?” chan said, still holding me by the waist. I nodded, wanting this to all be over. don’t pass out yet y/n, get to the van first. I watched as the guy waved their hand to come on and thats when we went. “duck!” chan called out as we ran out. it felt like time went in slow motion. bullets flying everywhere, I could barely hear. I felt chan pick me up slightly and throw me in the van. I fell on the floor of the van and stayed there, not moving, not because I wanted to but because I couldn’t. I felt my mind fog up and numbness, the last thing I remember was chan looking at me before he hopped in the van.

I woke up in a room I’d never seen before. I sat up carefully, not wanting to get light-headed again. the sun was fully out now, but I couldn’t tell what time it was. maybe it was all just a bad dream and I woke up from a one night stand, I said trying to convince myself. that was short lived as chan walked into the room. “oh you’re up.” he said, holding a glass of water and a plate of food. I didn’t say anything and just stared at him. chan sighed and looked down before making his way over to me. he sat the stuff on the end table, “this is for you, minho made it. you may or may not remember him, but you met him before.” he said, sitting on the side of the bed. he turned his head to me, “how you feelin’?” he asked. I didn’t give him an answer. “okay, what do you want to know?” he asked, looking at the ground. I scooted up so my back would be against the bed frame. “all that happened last night was real.” I stated, making chan nod. “what happened? why did it happen? why did everyone have guns? I thought everyone was working? why was there a shootout at my apartment?” I asked, all the questions that flooded my brain.

chan straightened his back a bit before answering. “well to start off, everything I’m about to tell you is true. not a joke, alright?” he said. “okay.” I answered, bringing my legs to my chest, “we were working. it went bad and felix got hurt. we are in an organization called stray kids, I know you’ve heard that name before and what it’s about.” chan said, looking at the wall, his eyes dancing along the frame of the paintings in the room. he’s right, almost every other week the news had something to say about them for the last couple of years. one word kept ringing through my head. mafia. they were apart of it. my best friend felix is apart of the mafia. I could feel the air leave my lungs. “we were in a meeting but it was all a ruse, they were planing on killing us. we got split up, felix got hurt and seungmin, our med guy, wasn’t with us. I was in a panic and thought of the next person I could go to, which was you.” he said. chan turned back to me, “which was so sutpid of me because now I put you in this dangerous world that me and the boys live in.” I didn’t know what to say, it was all so overwhelming. chan stood up and fully turned to me. “what do I do?” I asked, looking straight into his eyes. he sighed once more, “we have to stay here for a bit, till its safe enough for you to go back to work.” he answered, “you’ll be safe here in this house. I promised I’d keep you safe, right?” he said. I nodded at his question. “and that’s what I intend to do. now eat before your food gets to cold.” chan said before leaving the room.

I grabbed the water and chugged half of it down. I stared at the food before grabbing it. god, how long we will have to stay here, I wondered.

two months go by. a very long two months. the boys doing the busy work that they do. with nothing for me to do, I clean and help cook food, though they have stated over a hundred times that I don’t have to. “well, it helps past time.” I told hyunjin once. it started to feel like home almost, in a strange way. hanging out all together somewhere. playing games or laughing at funny stories of childhood. 

today, most of the boys were out of the house. only felix, jeongin, chan and I were ‘home’. we were all in the living room but jeongin- probably in the bathroom or something. having a normal conversation about old memories. we had gotten to the topic of crushes and dating. I had brought up to chan that felix had a crush on one of our teachers growing up, making chan laugh.

“I mean he was pretty hot though!” felix said, making me push his shoulder. “felix, remember your talking about our 9th grade history teacher!” I said with a shocked face. “okay and..” he said, rolling his eyes. “I’ve never made sense of why some students had crushes on their teachers.” chan said, sipping the drink he had in his hand. “thank you!” I said, looking at him. I turned back to felix, giving him a look. “well at least I’ve actually dated people and not pretend that my giant stuff animal was the love of my life.” felix said with a smirk. “you fucking bitch, you said you’d never say that in front of people.” I said, swatting him on the back of the head. “at least I don’t have a crush on lil’ binnie.” I said, mocking felix who jaw dropped to the floor. “how the fuck do you know that?” he asked. “please, it so fucking obvious. following him around, cuddle up next to him, always being the first to help- even when he doesn’t need it.” I said. “yeah, it really is, felix.” chan stated with a big grin.

“ya know, to be honest when I first hung out with you two I thought you were dating.” chan said, making us look at him with wide mouths. I turned my head back to felix and we both started laughing. “I would never date her, I like guys more than girls. I wouldn’t even kiss her to save earth.” felix said, almost falling off the couch. I couldn’t even say anything because I was laughing so hard. “what don’t like guys, y/n?” chan asked. “no, she does. just doesn’t talk to people enough to date them.” felix said, wiping away his tears.

“yeah, most of the guys I’ve talked to, were just huge dicks so. eh.” I said, looking back at chan once I had calmed down enough. he raised his eyebrows, tilting his head to the side. “what chris?” I asked. he made a face and shook his head. “nothing.” he said. “oh what about you. who were your old crushes? have you even dated anyone mr. workaholic?” I sassed. chan narrowed his eyes at me as felix oo’ed at us. “she got you there chan.” felix said, chan looked at him to make him shut up. felix got up, “I’m just gonna go hang out with jeongin if I can find him. have fun.” felix said, winking at chan. felix knows something is up, that only him and chan knew. we watched as he left the room as the silence got loud. 

“to answer your question. of course I’ve had crushes, only dated once back in school.” chan said. “aw, that’s cute.” I said, putting my hand up to my chin. “you can stop with the attitude.” chan said, sitting up as he placed his arms on his knees. “and what if I don’t, what will you do chris?” I challenged, making him laugh. “you don’t want to know.” he said. the air in the room thickened as we had a stare off. “sounds like a pussy move to me.” I said, giving him a smile before standing up. I tried to leave to the room to go calm myself down. it felt so hot because of him.

“and where do you think you’re going?” he said as he grabbed my arm and pulled me into his chest, which to my surprise he was standing now. he towered of me with a mean glint behind his eyes. I felt butterflies dance in my stomach. I looked up at him with wide eyes. “what? cat got your tongue sweetheart?” he asked as his other hand went on my back. “no, I can talk just fine.” I said, trying to push him away but failed. he chuckled and swayed us side to side, making my face feel warm. “you know, there is a reason why I let you call me by my other name.” chan said. yeah, he always got onto the boys for saying chris, but never towards me and I’ve always wondered why. I tilted my head to the side as he looked me. “and what’s the reason?” I asked, making him smirk and look away. 

“what were you, me, and felix just talking about?” chan asked as he placed his hands on my waist. “about our crushes. and you still haven’t talked about yours sir.” I said, poking him the chest. he laughed once more with his head back, showing off those cute dimple of his. once he was done, he just looked at me. “because I’m already talking to her.” he said, scanning my face. I froze with a shocked look on my face, jaw dropped and wide eyes. “you like me?” I asked, to which he simply nodded to. “why? I didn’t think my body type was something you like.” I said, looking down that my thick thighs and tummy fat. “I don’t care about you weight, I just like you. why does anybody like anybody? but I’ve liked you since I’ve gotten to know you, especially since we’ve been here.” chan said, bringing his hand up to my cheek. somewhat I leaned into his touch and smiled. “well good thing I like you too.” I said, making him smile even more. he leaned in but stopped halfway. “can I kiss you?” he asked. “please do.” I said.

then his lips were on mine, instantly making me feel twists in my stomach. I could taste the bitterness of his drink on his lips- which had cracks but still were super soft. I pushed my hands to his neck and gripped his hair. chan moaned into my mouth at the feeling, pulling me as close to him as he could. I felt his tongue on my bottom lip, wanting to get in my mouth. when I didn’t let him, his hands slid down to my ass and gave it a firm squeeze. I gasped, making his tongue enter between my lips. his tongue exploring everywhere it could, while fighting my tongue for dominance. he pulled away, kissing the side of on left jaw, down to my neck.

“god, I’ve wanted to touch and taste you for so long now.” chan groaned out, sucking and biting harshly at my neck. “chris.” I moaned out quietly, bringing one hand down back to his chest to grip his shirt. he slowly brought his hands up, dragging my shirt with it. I shivered as his cold hands touched my warm back. he kissed my collarbone before bringing his now red lips back to mine. he pulled away and made eye contact with blown out eyes filled with lust. I leaned into his neck and started doing the same thing he did to me. “shit.” he said as he brought one hand to the back of my head. 

after feeling up each other, I trailed my kisses back up to his lips. “I want you. so bad.” he said into the kiss. “have me then.” I whispered. he instantly grabbed the back of my thighs and laid me down on the couch. he hooked his fingers under my shirt and pushed my shirt above of boobs. he moaned, kissing down my chest to the hem on my pants. he quickly unbuttoned them and started to slowly pulled them down, along with my underwear. once they were off, he brought his hand to my core. rubbing firm slow circles around my clit, before dragging one finger down to my entrance. he pushed a finger into me, watching my reaction to make sure I liked it, slowly leaning his head down.

“please don’t go so slow, chris.” I said, pushing my hand through his hair and slightly pulling at it. he chuckled as his lips came in contact with my clit, while thrusting a second finger into me. I moaned as he picked up the pace, feeling him curl his fingers. I clenched around his fingers every time he brought his tongue to my clit. “fuck channie.” I moaned out. chan quickly gently slapped my inner thigh with his free hand, making it jiggle. “I only want to hear chris come out of your pretty lips, got it.” he said as he curled his fingers, finally finding my g-spot. “yes chris. fuck!” I moaned out loud as I gripped the side of the couch tightly, he smirked and continued his work on my body.

“I want you to cum for me sweetheart.” he said, leaving love bites on my inner thighs. I arched my back, feeling the pressure of my high getting closer and closer. “harder chris.” I said, pulling his head back to my clit. he laughed as he licked my clit again. I groaned as he put more pressure into his thrusts, keeping it at the same speed. “come on babygirl, I know you want to cum so bad. cum for me baby.” he said, dragging his tongue around my clit. i felt the knot brust hard and my mind go fuzzy as I chanted his name like a song. he slowly pulled his fingers out and pushed his tongue into me, making me clamp my big thighs around his head. chan just continued, lapping up all my juices as he hands came to my thighs to hold and caress them. “god, I love your cunt.” he said in a deep aussie accent. I whined as he licked up to my clit. 

he climbed over me and kissed me again, making me taste myself. “do you think you can handle more?” he asked, as he held my hand that was close to him. I nodded, leaning up to kiss him even more. I knew I was never going to get enough of him. 

he pulled away to pull off his shirt but was interrupted by his phone ringing in his back pocket. “shit.” he said, sitting up and pulling out his phone. he answered the call and watched his face turn cold fast. chan stood up and walked to the other side of the room so I wouldn’t hear the call. I sat up and watched him. either the boys who were out got into some trouble or something really bad happened…or about to happen. “okay.” chan said, before quickly ending the call. “get your pants on, go to my room, and do not leave unless me or one of the boys come get you.” chan said, pointing to me before going to the base of the stairs calling out to jeongin and felix. 

I got up and pulled my pants back up around my legs. 

“what’s going on?” felix asked as they ran down the stairs. I stood beside the three of them. “the rest were on their way back and noticed a car following them too late. they’ll be here in 2 minutes.” chan said, as they walked to the door. jeongin ran to the meeting room and grabbed the three of them guns. as I started up the stairs, I turned around. “what if something happens to me if I alone in the house?” I called out. chan had already opened the front door and was about to walk out. “go, I’ll be out there shortly.” he told the boys. chan jogged back to me as I started up the stairs again. 

we entered his room, I stopped in the center of the room as he went to his dresser. he bent down and opened the bottom drawer. “come here.” he said as he pulled out two items. I walked over to him, watched as he showed me both. a knife and a gun. “keep both on you, you can use either one.” he said, putting the knife with its sheath on my body first. once it was clipped, he showed me the gun. “it should have three bullets in it, the safety is on.” he said, explaining quickly to me how to use it properly. “hopefully you won’t have to use either.” he said, standing up and handing me the gun. chan kissed my lips before leaving the room. “lock the door behind me and remember do not let anyone in unless it me or the boys.” he said as he closed the door. I ran over and locked th door and turned around to look at his room. then I heard the first round of shot go. I slid down the door and sighed, it’s going be a long late afternoon.

and I was right about my words. the sun was already fully down by the time the other gang had backed off. I stood up when the shooting had stopped and placed the gun and blade on the dresser. I walked over to chan’s bed and sat down. waiting for the boys to come in. I heard the door slam closed and chan’s loud voice letting them what to do. 

“lee know. changbin. take him downstairs. everyone else check the area, keep sure their gone. once that is done, y’all can get cleaned up and do whatever.” I heard him say as he voiced got louder. I stood up and walked over to the door as chan knocked on the door. he entered the room and quickly started removing his shirt, throwing it in the corner.

“you okay?” I asked, watching him closely. he unbutton his pants, sliding them down his legs. “yeah, I’m fine,” he said, turning to me. I’m sure he could see the blush on my cheeks as I tried to look away so I won’t stare at him or his dick print. he walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me. bringing his face close to the right side of my face. “join me in the shower?” he asked right in my ear, smirking as he felt me shiver. I nodded as he squeezed my hips. he grabbed my hands and brought me along with him to the bathroom that was in his room.

the shower was running, fog surrounding the closed off room. we weren’t in the shower yet. chan has lifted me up and placed me on the counter, lips meeting mine. he hands going under my shirt, groaning at how soft my skin felt. the room just making us feel even hotter and more needy for each other. chan quickly pulled my shirt over my head, kissing down my chest. he tapped on my thighs, “lift your hips baby.” he said, wanting to pull off my pants and underwear. I grabbed the back of his neck and brought his lips back to mine.

I used my other hand to lightly scratch down his chest. down to his crotch, grabbing it firmly. “fuck baby. get on your knees, I want you to suck me off.” he said, pulling down his underwear. I hopped off the counter and sat right in front of his already half-hard cock. I would say he was a little above average in length and slender. I felt myself clench as I took him in my hand. he groaned as he threw his head back. I took him in my mouth, using as far as I could go. I hollowed out my cheeks as I bobbed my head, swirling my tongue each time I pulled back. “shit, who taught you to suck dick like a slut?” he asked, grabbing my hair. I moaned around him as he guided my head faster on his cock a few times before pulling me off.

he held out his hand and helped me off the ground. once I was standing with him, I turned around so he could take off my bra. his hands, slowly went up my hips. to my waist. my back straightened up as I felt his fingers. up and up before taking his time unhooking my bra. he kissed my shoulder before looking at me through the mirror. “let’s get in the shower babygirl.” he said.

I sighed as I felt the warm water hit my skin, feeling relaxed already. chan turned me to face him and leaned down to kiss me. “I need you.” he said, lips never leaving mine. I putting my arms around his neck as he lifted me up and pressed me to the cold shower wall. shivers went down my back. “put me down you’re going to hurt yourself trying to hold me.” I said as I wrapped my thighs around his hips. “no, I want you to take my cock like this.” he said, taking hold of his cock and pushing inside me.

we both moan at the feeling. “I know you can take my cock like a big girl.” chan groaned out and he started thrusting his hips ups. “oh chris!” I moaned out. the sound of skin slapping together, slicened by the water. chan groaned in my ear, kissing my neck. I leaned my head back, loving the feeling of how his cock was hitting deep inside me. 

“fuck, you’re so tight around me.” he said, moving my body up and down to meet his thrusts. I cried out as I felt my high approaching. “talk to me baby, how good am I making you feel?” he asked, bringing his head to mine. I opened my eyes, that I didn’t know were closed until I met his. “you’re making me feel s’good chris. I love how deep you are. god, I’m gonna cum!” I said, clawing it his back. he hissed the the feeling, bringing his hand down to my clit. “be a good girl for me a cum.” he said. I felt my orgasm rip my body, he held on to me tightly as my legs unraveled. 

he thrusted a few more times, before taking me off him and placing my feet on the ground. with an arm around my waist, he jerked himself off. cumming over my stomach and thighs. “shit.” he moaned. I leaned up and kissed him again, wanting to feel his lips. i pulled away a little bit, lips hovering of his. 

“does this mean I stay here? with you and the boys? because I wouldn’t mind helping seungmin, being his assistant.” I said, he laughed. “you’re stuck with us baby.” he said with a smirk, kissing my lips once more. “I’m already used to it.” I mumbled, racking my hands up his chest.

“okay let’s hurry and get cleaned up.” chan whispered, as he felt the water turning cold.

after the shower, we took our time getting dressed. chan threw on a shirt and some sweats. I slipped on a shirt of his and a [aor of leggings. “let’s head downstairs.” chan said, walking to the door. I followed him out the door and made our way downstairs. all the boys were sitting around, watching a disney movie with a few of them holding beers in their hands. “oh wow, manly men watching a very manly movie.” I said, sitting next to felix. “yes, moana is a very manly disney movie y/n.” jisung said, rolling his eyes as everyone laughed. “where’s minho?” chan asked, looking around the room. “he’s making dinner.” seungmin said, pointing to the kitchen. “alright.” chan said as he made his way to sit next to jeongin. 

felix leaned close to me and in a hushed voice, “so how’d it go?” felix asked. “how did what go lix?” I asked. “did chan not tell you?” felix asked, looking at chan then back to me. I wanted to laugh, but kept it in. “tell me what?” I said, tilting my head at him. “guys shush, my favorite song is coming on!” hyunjin whined as the song started to play. I glanced at chan, who was already looking at me and smiled before looking at the tv. tamatoa was singing shiny. I leaned back and enjoyed the rest of the movie.

“dinner is ready.” minho called out from the kitchen as the movie was ending. the boys cheered as we all got up and headed towards to delicious smelling food. “I’m so hungry.” jeongin said. the boys agreeing and being loud. chan waited for them to walk past and waited for me to catch up. chan gave me a wink then continued to walk the kitchen with me by his side. half the boys already sat down and quickly making plates. felix glanced at us before looking back at the food. he paused and snapped his head back to us and smiled brightly. “chan got something to tell us!” felix said, basically jumping in his seat. I made my way to an open chair and sat down with blush on my cheeks. everyone’s heads turned towards chan as he just laughed and shook his head. chan sat down next to changbin across the table and a few seats down from where I was.

dinner was passing with ease. drinking, eating, laughing. chan and I shared several looks to each other. “something’s going on between y/n and chan.” jeongin said out of no where and everyone stop what they were doing and look at the both of us. “I knew something happened!” felix said, putting down his chopsticks. “and why do you say that jeongin?” chan asked, not lifting his head from his  food but eyes staring at jeongin. “because I saw you two in the living room. I came down to grab a bottle of water and saw something…happening.” jeongin said with a big smirk. my and everyone’s jaws dropped, but felix who jumped up from his seat. “you finally said your feeling to her!” he said excitedly. “alright, yes I did. now hush.” chan said, leaning back in his seat. “wow, chan’s got a girl now, didn’t think he would get one first.” hyunjin said. “congrats old man.” seungmin said, making everyone laugh. “okay I’m done with dinner.” chan said with a big smile. chan got up and started walking away. he stopped at the door and turned back to everyone and locked eyes with me. “you coming sweetheart?” chan asked. “yeah I am.” I answered, standing up and meeting him at the door. chan leaned down and kissed my lips, making the boys go wild again as we walked away laughing.

yeah, I’m already used to it.

#bang chan #bangchan #bang chan smut #bangchan smut #skz smut #stray kids smut #skz #skz imagines #stray kids #stray kids imagines #skz fluff #skz x reader #skz x y/n #skz mafia au #stray kids mafia au #bang chan mafia

[submariini]

Thee Antwerp Gig Overview (by #5)

me and @jeevm arrived around 7:50am at the gig, numbers 4 and 5 bc belgians simply are not a queuing people. not much happened beside chaotic uno and trix doing a short interview with us seven? i think at that point i forget

the bus arrived a little before ten am, and we were allowed to sit inside at that point so we just all went outside again and just stood there for a whole ass three hours being clowns.

jaakko, jukka and jesse walked by a few times entirely undisturbed bc belgians also do not talk ever. (and dutch ppl ig). respectful times.

eventually, at around one, Häärijä got off the bus (mostly as a distraction for K going the other way). This man came by like proper we thought he was gonna just walk by, but he waved and then decided to ignore everyone and beeline straight into my direction for a hug? hello? unsure how he still knows what i look like (was not in the yellow tshirt yet bc cold and he hasnt seen me since simerock).

K and Jesse came by as well -- please note at this point there were like goddamn 40 people there. Nothing like the Munich papal visit scenes at any point.

K just the nicest. Didn't remember me from simerock (fair, it was a factory of photographs) and was like wtf rollo (as per ushe), complimented my boots bc he likes them (they are r+ but usually kids sizes) and i got to be "mean" abt the r+ ticket sale and the bus making it stressful. When he asked it I wanted him to sign anything, I didn't have anything and he just offered to sign my boots? Man did not expect the clown to clown communication that was happening bc he seemed very oh god for real when I agreed.

Someone gave him a necklace and instantly wanted to put it on. The person who gave it couldn't fasten it bc nails/shaking hands so I offered to try and then idk how it got fastened bc christ I shook as well. Not helpful: Mikke both filming that and the boot signing up close 😭

Told Jesse he told me at simerock that I should just join the tour bus and he went "yeah that sounds like something I would say." then scolded me for not having been in Berlin for that 😭

H wandered back and forth a bit, had another weird football chat (rip hazards career) where I was sitting on a little wall, back to the bus still at that point, and he just leaned into me turning around and just held my shoulders the entire time? When I got sweaty and took my hoodie off later he also suddenly grabbed my tshirt when it was riding up I am Feeling Fine.

Was wearing the yellow tshirt w the cross stitch and he made me turn to show Jesse??? And Jesse did the nicest "wait can I touch this?" bc I guess he thought it would be fragile???

People formed a nice selfie line and K just said he's santa claus 🎅

H vanished, then came back out of the bus, and we had a weird mime moment bc I wasnt sure if he was motioning at me to get to him away from the rest. He was and I got fucking free merch??? Like free, not yet available merch. Genuinely what the FUCK. Im making an extra post abt this most likely bc I cannot explain what the hell happened in that moment and the things around it.

When Mikke did the interview w the first queuer, H just stood behind the glass door into the venue and started miming at us. Like not even properly in character? Help.

Gig

Jesus Belgian audiences proving once again we just Are like that. Refusing to goddamn shut up. Every time. Man disallowed to banter by loud belgian screaming. He seemed so touched though jesus christ time to cry

Got roasted for basically slut dropping and shooting my Häärijä sign up in the air before Mic Mac. "yes that mean fucking häärijä" local man fed up w my antics.

Got roasted AGAIN straight after Mic Mac because I was the person he pointed at during the "this is your home now" bit. (promptly decided diving behind the barrier and Face In Hands was the best reply)

Mild bit before the 2nd Cha Cha Cha as I was the front row person he called out for not sitting down. Just yelled that I got bad knees and I'm not sure anyone caught his reply properly 😂

Overall 10/10 excellent gig what the HELL. The belly flop on the balloon, the whole banter before paidaton bc so much of the queue ppl I was with took their shirt off, the way we refused to kept chanting, him trying to eat the bubbles, him talking about Hs dick and the whole balls convo??

Post Gig

Had to pick up merch for a few people, so went with the hope of a third Häärijä hug. He eventually got a bit held up outside of merch by people (lit at the door into the merch room) and I got to just "Sorry it's me again" but he just instantly hug. We talked a little about the gig (did I like it, how I was doing) and like K feeling much better/doing better ft. some dumb crap.

Merch was in fact gotten after I just LOST my friends bc of H.

CANNOT wait for London. and Glasgow but thats with normal people. Like met so many fun people in the queue who are going to be at London jesus christ. Party time.

#käärijä #häärijä #ed.txt #straight up lets GO

[thecameronchronicles]

Sweetheart

TW: Language. Mentions of domestic abuse. Smut. Loss of virginity (reader). Mentions of blood. 

SUMMARY: JJ returns to the Chateau with new wounds from Luke, prompting you to try and offer support as he is walking the fine line between purpose and pity, and you’re desperate to show him his worth. 

WORD COUNT: 2600

*Original Concept*

Sweetheart

JJ Maybank was a hothead through and through. Which was why when he barreled through the front door of The Chateau without so much as a word, nobody did anything more than shrug it off. Of course, a few looks and comments were exchanged, but most at his expense. Kiara commented how it was probably from being rejected from another touron and Pope interjecting and saying it had to do with being fired yet again from his negligence or lack of punctuality. But you saw something they apparently hadn't. The familiar bruising left behind from someone that was supposed to love him. 

You had waited a moment for him to cool down however, before you'd pull yourself into the room he had claimed as his own, finding him shaking off his hand until hearing the wood creak beneath your step. The second his eyes lifted to you, your heart twisted into knots. The sapphire hues were glossed over in tears, those very tears falling down a bruised jaw and torn lip, but nothing of the comparison to his inner turmoil that drove him to internalize it once he had arrived here. 

"JJ-" 

"I don't want your pity, okay?" He sniffled. 

"What happened?" 

He scoffed, now rising to his feet. 

"What always happens! It's always the same shit with him, okay? What do you wanna hear?" 

"J,-" 

"I don't want the emotions! I don't want any of your fucking pity! I-" 

"It's not pity, JJ...I want to make sure you are alright- '' To this, his jaw trembled. Half because you had noticed when everyone else seemed indifferent and half because he felt he didn't deserve it. But this was how he felt whenever he was around you. Where John B was more of an older brother and Pope could act as a mentor, Kiara was a parental figure that constantly corrected him, you were always that means of support he otherwise lacked. Even if you rarely spoke out of turn, you were vocal when you were passionate in defense , which meant you were usually quiet as he made it a point to protect you so you wouldn't have to. But just as he had done this for you, you wanted to do it for him. 

"It doesn't matter..." He muttered as you moved to him, trying to console him by a soft touch onto his torn hands, but he just rose and pulled his steps in the opposite direction. 

"It does to me..." 

"You're the only one...My mom skipped town before I knew the state capitals, my dad spends every penny on whatever alcohol he can get his hands on...not to mention the pills...and all my friends don't notice how I'd give anything to switch places with any of 'em...Everybody doesn’t notice…" He paused. "Everyone but you..." His eyes narrowed. 

"But it's only a matter of time until you see it too..." 

"See what?" 

"That I'm...I'm nothing. A waste, I'm-" 

"JJ!" 

"No, it's true! I can't keep a job or a girl for more than a week, and if not for that stupid pogue rule, I wouldn't have to pretend not to want-" He stopped himself, "What I want." He veiled his words as his gaze to you made your heart race. You knew that he, and every other pogue, harbored a crush on Kiara at one point, hell you did too. But you now knew these words were specified towards you. It was that final validation of feelings and words left unspoken. And it made you desperate to prove them as the words he spoke against himself broke your heart. 

"Everything I have, it gets ruined...every goddamn thing...I can't take it anymore...I can't take him and this...and...being here… so close to, I can't-" 

"J, listen," But he continued, a hand taken to his chest to now showcase a peak level of anxiety as your feet advanced before you could stop them, the need to be on your toes to reach his lips having been met, before you were against his. The instant regret that came from breaking the singular rule among your group of friends along with the imminent rejection you'd come to expect would have you cursing 'oh God' in a repetitious chant as you moved to the door. 

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have, I-" You turned back before feeling him suddenly pull you towards him. A sweet peck validated he was simply taken him back as the way he pinned you to the door explained the mutual passion, as the desire was finalized in the way he held you against him. 

"But your lip-" 

"It doesn't hurt-" 

"JJ..." 

"It. Doesn't. Hurt." He explained again, this time with dominance, before he led his hands to your hips once again. But he had only done this to turn you against the door. 

"I want to be sweet with you...But I have also wanted this for so long-" You wrapped your arm into a craning position around his neck, pulling him softly over your shoulder. 

"Please don't be sweet with me..." 

"You sure you want this? I won't ask again." You nodded as his hand, blood now dried down to his wrist, pulling your jaw until he could breathe against your lips. 

"Fuck me, JJ-" He growled, dropping down to his knees and taking your shorts and panties with them, guiding you from them, before rising back behind you. Without a word and only the sound of shuffling, you would feel him at your back, returning to you with a bare chest that made your bottom lip become captive between your teeth. Of course, you’d seen him without a shirt before, probably more than he had been covered, and yet, there was something erotic in knowing this was exclusively because of you. He would then repeated the process to you until you were in your bra, his fingers eager to feel the breasts beneath, perfect for his palms to massage as you whimpered beneath his touch. 

“You’re too sweet for all the dirty little things I want to do to you…” 

“I can take it…” You whimpered as he smirked. 

“I hope you mean it…because I’m not stopping.” As you went to speak, you found the lace recently around your hips having now rested between your teeth. 

“Tell me, sweetheart…you as sweet as you look?” You whimpered, unable to answer as you were too anxious for his touch that curved around your hip and came to a rest between your legs, teasing your clit that ached for him and only him, as it always had. 

“That’s okay, I’m gonna find out soon enough…But first…” He brought his fingers inside of you, one at a time until both were curved inside of you with purpose, “I want to hear you…Just enough to know how it feels…not so they know just how good it does…” You brought your palms to the door in front of you, his second hand joining your hand, interlacing your fingers from behind, before pushing you harder to the door. 

“I know it’s gonna be hard, baby…but I need you to be quiet for me, okay?” You nodded. The moment you had validated your understanding, you were guided to the bed. His fingers to your sex and his lips to your shoulder hadn’t budged as you were taken to the ledge of his sheets, always disheveled from the proof of lacking motivation for such organization. 

“Lay down for me…I can be sweet to start, but there’s no promises when you start begging for me…” You obeyed, guided by his grip, until he pulled you over his shoulders. 

“I want you to come on my face, okay? Think you can do that for me-”

“JJ…”

“Quietly?” He reminded as you nodded. 

“Good…”

“Wait-” You caught his cheek. “Your lip…I don’t want it to hurt you…” 

“Always worried about me…” He kissed your inner thigh, making your eyes flutter closed, before he let out a breath against your clit that made you open them again. 

“But I can promise, my tongue’s perfectly fine.” Before you could reinstate your worry, he was devouring you in slow succession, savoring every unexplored inch and relishing in just how you responded to him. Every flex of your hips and groan silenced behind clenched teeth had been enough to make him accelerate. His tongue pulled deeper, his fingers now made a new insertion inside of you, searching and finding THAT spot almost immediately. 

“Oh, that’s it…hmmm?” He moaned against you, feeling you clench around him. You nodded, desperate for him to continue. 

“JJ, please…”

“Let go…come for me, sweetheart…so sweet…” He almost purred into you as you trembled, his free hand used to pull your legs further apart so he could go even deeper.

“JJ!”

“Baby, you gotta be quiet-”

“Please…” You pulled your fingers through his hair. 

“Please…” You whined as he nodded, smirking, as he attacked your clit, leaving absolutely nothing but pleasure coursing through you. The moans he set into you would only worsen your sensations as you struggled to remain quiet, sensations deepening as his hand came to your breast to play with your nipple, stars now behind your eyes as you came as he sought after. 

“JJ…” You were already directing him onto your knees, desperate to reciprocate, as he stopped you by taking hold of your wrist. 

“You don’t belong on your knees…”

“I want to…Please, JJ, I want to feel you in the back of my throat.” He clenched his jaw, licking his lips apart, before releasing your grasp. 

“You keep talking like that and I’m not gonna last long-”

“I want to make you come. If it feels as good for you-”

“You’re joking, right?! Just hearing you moan makes me almost come.” He scoffed as you blushed. “But you don’t have to…” You began to stroke him. 

“I want it to feel good, JJ…Please help me so it does…”

“Spit…use your…sp-fuck…” You deciphered his request, drooling over him as you brought your eyes back up to find his mouth parted in complete disbelief. 

“What the fuck…”

“Does it hurt?” You retracted as he set out a heavy breath. 

“No…Just…shit, everything you do is so sexy…it’s not fair…” You smirked before setting another stream of spit down his shaft, twisting around him as he guided you for pressure and speed until you found a rhythm that no longer needed direction. But you would wait until he closed his eyes before taking him in your mouth.

“FUCK! Oh SHIT!”

“JJ…” You moaned. 

“I don’t care…I won’t be quiet when you feel like that…But I need you to look at me…I need to make sure you’re…you’re okay…Fuck…sweetheart, I’m-”

“Come…” You murmured, “Come JJ…” You moaned as he slid closer to the end of the bed, struggling to force you to deep throat him as he wanted to remain kind to you, but needed that release. The belting of your name would send you over him in a straddle, your body penetrated before you could adjust to him, the sting of his stretch making you wince as he was quick to attend to you. 

“Shit, was I too-”

“It’s fine-I’m okay…please…” 

“We can stop-”

“DON’T. STOP.” You begged through clenched teeth, pushing through the pain, before feeling him collect your breast and take it to his lips. The distraction worked long enough for you to stop tensing and begin to enjoy the sensations his body allowed. 

“Oh my God, OH MY GOD! JJ!”

“I know-I fucking know it…OH SHIT!” He grunted behind his teeth as you nodded. 

“Please…faster…harder…more…just more-” He scoffed before taking you onto your back, flipping you over onto your stomach, before pausing. The sound of your name, more specifically the cadence it was spoken in had been that of almost reprimanding as he noticed something upon the withdrawal. 

“You were a fucking virgin? Why didn’t you-”

“Please, JJ…PLEASE…”

“I-”

“Please…” You turned back to face him as he set you in a return to your back. 

“Then it’s gonna be like this.” He was softer, the sensations made deeper from this. “And if you lie again…” He winced, returning himself inside of you. 

“Shit, if you didn’t feel so good, I wouldn’t let you come at all…” You moaned beneath him, the idea of being edged or neglected having made you groan in desperation. 

“Don’t ever lie to me again…I could have hurt you..shit, part of me wants to.” You led his hand to your neck. 

“I can take it.” He grunted until this fell into a growl, making you tremble beneath him as he brought you both to that edge that made you cry out for him. HIs hand came to your mouth to try and silence you as you returned it to your neck.

“I can be quiet…”

“You want me to choke you?”

“To hold me.” He nodded in validation. 

“Come for me, sweetheart…show me it feels good, show me I’m not hurting you-”

“JJ please, please don’t stop-I’m so close-” Your nails ate into his shoulders as he nodded. 

“Me too baby, but I don't’ wanna come inside-” Your fingers pulled him tighter. 

“Do it. Inside me. Right now, J- Please!”

He grunted. “I can’t take that fucking whining…it’s too much…I just want to give you everything.”

“Then give it to me JJ…” 

“Keep talking like that and I’ll take you from behind too…”

“Please! I want all of it!” He growled. 

“Shit!” He withdrew, taking you back onto your knees and lifting you to level with his hips. 

“Come here…” He drove you to the edge of the bed, having you grip the headboard as he pulled you against his chest. 

“I wanted to be sweet for you, I wanted to be nice-but you drive me so fucking crazy…”

“Fuck me JJ-” He growled again, a complete animal to the way you dissolved your sweetness into the sultry desire you felt for him. 

“Oh, I intend to…” He pounded into you, wrapping his fingers over yours as he returned you to that cusp. 

“Come for me, right now…No hands…Just me. Feel me…Use me…” You nodded, resting your head on his shoulder as he kissed your neck, grazing his teeth against you before you began to breathe quickly to indicate your nearing release. 

“I know you’re close…But I want to come with you…just a bit longer…just a…fuck…I’m…” He gripped tighter as you nodded. 

“Come with me, JJ…Please…”

“I’m gonna-I’m coming baby,...come with me…come with-”

“I’m coming…” You gasped as he bucked into you, holding you between him and the bed as you trembled. But as soon as his tremors stopped, he had you on your back, laying you flat, and leading your legs in a return over his shoulders. 

“JJ!”

“If I would have known it was your first time, I would have made you come twice.”

“You did…” You reminded him. 

“Before I was inside of you I mean…So now, this time…I’m making it all about you, sweetheart…always so sweet to me…time I returned the favor…” And with his bruised and bloodied knuckles at a rest over your skin, he had done just that…

Taglist: @hopebaker @iovdrew @penny4yourthoughts @magnificantmermaid @pickingviolets @lovedetlost @trikigirl271 @maybankslover @slut4starkey @slvtherinseeker @obxiskewl @obxxrxfes @bluesongbird @slut-era @ailee-celeste @rafesbae @pankhoeforlife @pankowperfection @camilynn22 @bethoconnor

#jj maybank #jj maybank smut #jjsmut #jj maybank x reader #jjmaybank #obx fanfiction #obxsmut #outer banks smut #obx #outerbanks #outer banks

[eris-snow]

Hi I was thinking if you could do aizawa having a sibling or daughter. Like a younger sister or daughter who he teaches and do some type of angst with them. Like him not paying much attention to her or she’s caught doing something (like smoking,drugs). Something like that. Thank you ❤️

I’m not comfortable writing any mentions about underage smoking or drinking (cause I assume that she's still in high school when this scene occurs) but I’ll try to make it up by making y/n kind of ‘bad girl’ ish!

I don't condone underage smoking or underage drinking. Please take care of your body :D

Note for the requester below!

Tags: daughter!yn, Aizawa, angst

“So, mind explaining what that was?” Aizawa asks, sighing as he pinches the bridge of his nose as he closes his room door in the dorms of Class A.

You think it's ironic because, even as his daughter, you’ve only seen this place once.

Your arms are littered with scars, a nasty bruise already forming on your cheek at where you’ve been punched. It throbs, sure, but it's nothing compared to your father's words.

No, his words are a knife to the chest. They’d make your heart bleed so much more than any quirk every could.

“Don’t want to,” You grouse, shrugging of your school bag. It lands on the ground with a loud thud as you try to reach for the door handle. A hand shoots out to grab yours firmly, making you freeze in your spot.

“May be I should have rephrased my statement,” Your father growls. “Tell me what happened, Y/n.”

His grip is controlled, gentle but firm in a way that makes you want to scoff. So he only cares now, when you kick up a fuss.

How flippant.

And yet, a small part of your mind still cowers at Aizawa’s anger. Your father’s icy wrath can be as cold as a snowstorm or as explosive as Bakugou, and you’re already anticipating and analyzing different ways you could mould yourself back into the person he wants you to be.

Pathetic.

“Nothing happened,” You mutter, not daring to move. “All I did was lose control a little, that’s all—”

“You picked a fight with my student, Y/n!” Aizawa raised his voice, causing tears to prickle your eyes. “Bakugou’s a ticking time bomb that blows up every 10 minutes. You know that, and you still did it! If it weren’t for Midoriya’s quick thinking to get me, you could have been seriously hurt!”

And that’s when it snaps.

“Your s-stu—” You break off, jerking your hand away from his. Your father’s eyes narrow, about to snap again— “Your daughter lost control of her quirk, Dad! Your daughter! Why is it you still care about your own goddamn students over me?”

Aizawa’s eyes widen, fury snuffing out. “Y/n—”

“NO!” You yell, shaking with emotion. “I’ve listened and watched for my whole fucking life. It’s my turn.”

Aizawa opens his mouth, but the minute tears spill from your eyes and a sob escapes your mouth, he presses his lips into a tight line.

“Your students have always been the priority. Ever since day one, you’d throw yourself in front of a villain crime lord to save them when I didn’t know if you’d even spend my birthday with me each year.” You bite your lip, trembling as the word vomit finally spews from your lips. You can’t stop it, and it just keeps coming and coming because now that the lid is off, the words bubble over like a volcano.

“Do you know what everyone in Class B says?” You grit your teeth, clenching your dirt-ridden shirt with your fingernails digging into your skin. The tears burn hot like magma, and you can’t stop yourself from choking the next few lines out. “They’ve labelled you the second father of Class A, Dad! Did you know that?”

A bitter laugh wrenches itself out of your lips, and you’re pretty sure your skin is bleeding at how tightly you’re clenching your shirt. “Am I not your daughter, Dad? Am I not important now that Mum’s gone?”

“I loved your mother—”

“But do you love me?” you sob out.

The question causes Aizawa’s heart to plummet faster than a ten-pound bowling ball. Your voice is so small, so uncertain, and it makes Aizawa’s heartache. Do you-do you seriously think that? That he didn’t love you?

His hesitation was a fatal mistake, because for the first time in a long while, you look up to him with defiance in your eyes. You’d always been a good child, Aizawa had taught you well, after all. But this? Your eyes were hard, stone cold, and it makes Aizawa stop short.

“That’s what I thought.” You curl into yourself with a small choke, hands finding the door handle before you glance back at him with a teary, broken gaze. “Go check on your precious Bakugou. They seem to need you way more than I do.”

The door slams and knocks down the picture frame hanging on his door, shattered glass fragmenting with a loud, high-pitched crash.

On it, is a photo of you and him on Father’s Day.

To be honest, he has already forgotten how long ago it was taken.

--

Note to the requester: I'm so sorry it's so late! I was debating if I should make it a happy ending and ultimately decided to go with this so it wasn't forced. Sorry if it wasn't exactly what you asked for, but I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless! Thank you for requesting! 💛

#mha #mha fanfiction #aizawa sensei #dadzawa #aizawa shouta #angst #aizawa angst #mha aizawa #boku no hero academia #mha angst #my hero academia #bnha

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

What do you think about the claims that Aang’s anti killing Is hypocritical because of the Blue Spirit’s rampage and it’s possible that people died when Aang would defend himself and his allies?

If we were to apply real world physics, biology or just common sense to the story, the show would not happen because Aang would have died inside that iceberg - no scratch that, there wouldn't be a story because HUMANS CAN'T CONTROL THE GODDAMN ELEMENTS!

Katara, Aang and Sokka would have also died, or at least being severly injured, with lots of broken bones, and possibly paralyzed from the waist/neck down after their attempt of using the Omashu mail system as a rollercoaster.

Firebenders should accidentally burn themselves all the time since their flames are always either dangerous close to their skin or directly touching it as they are created. Don't even get me started on lightning, especially with stuff like Iroh redirecting lightning FROM THE GODDAMN SKY. Toph should have also gotten severe burns in the finale because of that full-body armor she made with ABSURDLY HOT METAL and that was in direct contact with her skin.

Realistically, Sokka should have not have been able to help evacuate an entire village with not previous plan to do so like we saw him do in "Jet." The man Haru and Katara saved in "Imprisoned" should have been very hurt after all those rocks fell on him, and the fact that no died in that metal ship after all the COAL they threw at FIREBENDERS is absurd.

When the pirates put explosives in Zuko's ship, there's a split second where we can see he created a fire-shield - that would in now way in hell be able to allow him to just be walking around the following episode, with just a few superficial burns that are already healed in season two.

In the season one finale, Zhao very clearly aimed his flames at BOTH koi fish, yet only the one with the moon spirit died. Everything also becomes black and white for no real reason since the moonlight has nothing to do with how humans see things

For fuck's sake, the show full on says "AANG DIED AND KATARA BROUGHT HIM BACK FROM THE DEAD!"

Avatar is a children's show AND a cartoon. It operates on cartoon logic - aka, unless death is explicitly mentioned (Gyatso, Kya, Aang) or VERY heavily implied (Zhao, Jet, Combustion Man) we are supposed to assume that, somehow, everyone survived. The fact that fandom can accept EVERYTHING being unrealistic, then complains that people Aang fought survived the impossible just screams "I don't like that this character in a kid's show doesn't go around murdering every enemy in his path!" or "I don't like Aang because he got in the way of my ship, so I'll take any excuse to pretend he is actually a terribly written character everyone should hate!"

As for the Koizilla situation in particular, lets not forget that the very next episode has Aang having nightmares about it and showing that he very clearly does not know how to control the Avatar State, how it works, or even what it is. Roku literally shows up to EXPLAIN that stuff to him. HOW can we hold Aang accountable for something that was not his decision?

Once again, because of cartoon logic, the only sort of confirmed death was Zhao - and that one was 100% on the Ocean Spirit, since he had already split from Aang.

Not to mention "this person accidentally died because of one of my actions" is not always the same as "this person died because I chose to kill them." It's like the difference between a car crash where the driver wasn't able to stop in time VS literally shooting someone in the face.

Plus, in the finale Aang even reached the conclusion that, if he had no alternative, he WOULD kill Ozai, even though that would obviously take a great psychological/spiritual toll on him, because it would be ONE LIFE TAKEN AS A WAY TO SAVE THOUNSANDS, and even before that he had no problem with things like Sokka killing Combustion Man or even full on admiting "Fire Lord Ozai is a terrible person and the world would probably be a better place without him".

It's pretty clear that, even if Avatar DID go there and said "sometimes people died in battles against the Gaang", it would still NOT contradict Aang's beliefs, and therefore he is NOT a hypocrite, and the idiots of the fandom can die mad about it.

#pro aang #aang defense squad #aang deserved better

[averagewriter-inthedark]

My Wingman 💋| Joaquin Torres Marvel Headcanon

Link to my marvel Masterlist

Joaquin Torres crushing on an avenger would look like:

Just shortly before the Ultron drama, you were a young recruit to the avengers after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Unbeknownst to the team—especially Natasha—you were a former Black Widow who escaped the red room during a mission and defected to the U.S. before Dreykov could track you. Because the Red Room was constantly moving, you were clueless to where it could have gone and for your protection Fury had your identity changed and record concealed from the rest of the organization. This of course had people wary and suspicious of you—considering you were exceptional in the field—but you kept a low profile and did whatever Fury asked of you. He promised to inform you if the Red Room every came on their radar and vowed to help you take it down when the time came.

Unfortunately that promise would not happen with the implementation of the Sokovia Accords. Fury was off the grid, and your teammates were at odds with one another. Though you verbally remained neutral and did not physically get involved when the fight in Germany occurred, behind the scenes you were supportive of Steve and became close with him and Sam. You finally went rogue at 17 when Natasha confronted you after she discovered your identity and the fact the Red Room was still active. “Fury knew didn’t he? This whole time—you both knew Dreykov was still out there!” “It’s more complicated than you think, Natasha. I was barely fourteen when I escaped and had no where else to go! Fury did what he had to protect me. We both have tried tracking the Red Room but have gotten no leads.” “Well I have one. So let’s go end this once and for all.”

Together you two took down Dreykov with the help of her adoptive family before ultimately meeting up with Steve to break the others out of the Raft. For two years you went on the run. Then in 2018 you all were called to battle against the Mad Titan, Thanos, where you lost half of the population when he succeeded in his mission. For five years you and Natasha remained at the compound, doing whatever you could to maintain the Avengers. And when the opportunity came to fix it all, you were left heartbroken at the loss of her and Tony.

Sam took you under his wing (pun intended) when you and the other former fugitives received pardons. Steve was gone, the Avengers were not so much an active organization anymore, and the Accords had been abolished. You pretty much became a government agent again—with your true identity now that Dreykov was long gone. Every agency wanted you; FBI, CIA, Homeland Security, OSI, the Secret Service, even the goddamn Marshals were calling you to be one of their operatives. “Have you decided whose badge you’ll wear yet?” “I’ve pretty much narrowed it down to either the CIA or OSI. Ross is with the CIA so that’s a plus, but with OSI I could work with you when you’re off with the Air Force. Honestly, Sam, I feel like just becoming a free lance so I can get a taste of everything.”

In the end, you did become a free lance agent under the code name ‘Red Widow,’ as not to be confused with Natasha since she was always known as THE Black Widow. You wore a similar suit she did, except yours was red and the hourglass on the belt was black. You enjoyed being a free lance agent where you got to be flexible with what you did. But boy was it fucking hell at times. One week you’re escorting the President, the next you’re investigating a potential threat to the country, and (like most times) you’re partnering with Sam when he finds himself in a pickle. It’s on one of those many adventures with Sam that you meet First Lieutenant Joaquin Torres.

After the threatening phone call from Karlie, Sam had called you and you immediately sent a team of agents to protect his sister & nephews before getting on a plane to Riga. It was not even a second after you landed that you received dozens of phone calls, emails, texts, and news notifications about what took place in the middle of a crowded area between John Walker and a member of the Flag Smashers. You pretty much hauled ass to the location when you finally got a hold of Sam—and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t feel satisfaction at being the one to cuff Walker and escort him to the SUV.

Finally you find your friends, running into Bucky on his way out where you two exchanged words on what he was about to do. “Need me to get in touch with Okoye for you?” “I’m already on it—don’t worry about me.” After saying goodbye you entered the doorway to see Sam and a young Air Force Officer chatting. “Hope I’m not interrupting.” “You’re right on time, Red.” Your voice had the officer, who had his back to you, spinning around to which he froze when y’all made eye contact. First thing you thought was, ‘Damn he’s a cutie.’

Joaquin was practically smitten upon first glance. There was a light blush to his cheeks when he unconsciously checked you as you strutted up to the pair in your eye catching Red Widow suit. When Sam introduced him, the man couldn’t even find his voice, “Uh-Uh hi. I-I’m Torres—Joa-Joaquin Torres.” Sam looked amused, as did you, “Nice to meet you, Joaquin. I’ve got many names, but you can call me Y/n or Red.” Your wink at the end pretty much sealed the deal, Joaquin thinking, ‘Oh yeah, I’m screwed.”

Anytime Sam called you after that Joaquin would silently looking forward to seeing you. He thought you were absolutely beautiful, funny, intelligent, and a complete badass. The first time he saw you in action the man was rendered speechless. Of course he knew who you were (after restoring the population, you and the remaining avengers were international heroes) so Joaquin was pretty much a fanboy (if you know you know 😉). Seeing you take down ten men twice your size in the flesh was something he literally bragged to his squadron about for days.

You were well aware of the little crush Joaquin had on you. And to be honest, you shared the feeling. The first time you saw him you thought he was adorable with his cute smile and blushing cheeks (not to mention he looked damn good in uniform). Anytime Sam called you up and Joaquin was there, you couldn’t pass on the opportunity to flirt with him. “Nice to see your pretty face again, Torres.” “I heard that Sam gave you his old wings…have you decided what to do with them? I could use a wingman now that Sam is off being Captain America and hardly needs me anymore.”

Something about you implying you’d want him as a wingman motivated Joaquin to finish fixing up the wings he had already started working on. It excited him to work with you from behind the scenes, but he was itching to get in the air/on the ground and be an asset alongside you. Sam could tell what his goal was, so the older man slowly took Joaquin under his wing like he did you to help prepare him for the superhero life.

When it finally came time for Joaquin to join in on the action, he became your eyes in the sky while you scouted the ground. The Air Force was pretty much your main employer (similar to Sam) but you still did work for other agencies. And since you and Joaquin worked so well together, it was no surprise you’d call him up for help. He was your wingman after all. Not too long after, you two were a team sought after by the many agencies you did free lance work for. “Damn that’s the third mission this month! Don’t you ever get tired of this sometimes?” “Everyday, but I gotta keep the bills paid, pretty boy.”

Your friendship was very flirtatious. People often thought you two were a thing and were surprised to find out they were wrong. You teased and bickered, gave little glances when the other wasn’t looking and complimented each other. His name in your phone was literally ‘pretty boy💋’ and yours was either ‘muñeca🧸’ (doll) or ‘hermosa🥰’ (beautiful). Each time y’all would call the other the pet names, you’d both blush. The crushes on each other definitely increased with each flirtatious remark.

“Damn girl, you know how to make an entrance.” “Wait don’t go yet, let me commit your face to memory in case I die out there.”

“Imma need you to focus, Torres. I know I’m exceptional to look at, but I don’t want that pretty face of yours getting hurt because you’re distracted.” “If you die out there, who’s gonna dance with me at next months officers ball?”

It would be a good time before Joaquin finally worked up the courage to ask you out. As much as he liked you, there was the fear it would ruin the friendship y’all had created. Joaquin admired you from afar and would brush aside his feelings when it came time to business, but at the end of the day there was no denying he wished for something more. At one point Sam even brought it up, wondering why he hadn’t made a move. “It’s complicated, Sam. She’s my wingman and I’d hate to lose her.” “Torres, I see the way she looks at you. Have you ever noticed she never flirts with anyone else when we go out. At banquets people hit on her, but her eyes are only on you. Trust me, she wants the same thing as you.”

Although Sam’s words made him confident, Joaquin was still anxious it wouldn’t work. So he continued to harbor his crush on you from behind the scenes. Finally you had enough and decided to take matters into your own hands after a mission. It had been nearly a year since y’all met and quite frankly your feelings for Joaquin were starting to become overwhelming. “Are we gonna dance around this forever, Torres? Or, am I gonna have to drag you to the bar to have a drink with me and kick this off once and for all?”

At his incredulous expression, you walked up with your hands coming to his collar to pulled him toward you. That finally had him snap out of his daze, face red by how flustered he was. But within his expression was joy and awe, “I-uh. Are you sure, y/n? I care about you so much a-and I know I’ve made my crush on you painfully obvious b-but I-I don’t wanna ruin what we have—.” “Joaquin, you’ll always be my wingman because I trust you more than anyone else on this planet. The fact you are blind to see I feel the same about is both shocking and adorable. I want you to be my wingman both on and off the field in a more personal manner. So what do you say?”

Let’s just say, the kiss you received was him a great answer.

#joaquin torres #Joaquin torres imagine #joaquin torres x reader #joaquin torres headcanon #danny ramirez #the falcon and the winter soldier #fatws #the falcon #avenger!reader #marvel imagine #marvel fanfiction #avengers #avengers imagine #marvel headcanon #avengers headcanon #fluff #marvel fluff

[vivisection-and-vampyrism]

Home Sweet Home part seven

Content Warnings: Captivity, Starvation, Burns, Muzzles, Collars, Manipulation, Victim Blaming, Rats, Past Torture, Past Rape, Vampire Whumpees, Human Whumpers

Note: The girls (read: girl, boy, and creature) are fighting.

And now October was back downstairs. This was to be expected, of course. But it didn't particularly like being alone with Pavel and Odessa so soon after the incident with Falkner's friends.

At least it had its pet rats. They were always a comfort in these dark times. It scooped Mira up off the ground, and stroked her patchy gray fur.

Pavel's burns were so very interesting. They covered half his face like the villain from that superhero cartoon Arbor had introduced Falkner to on one of their dates. What was his name? It had been something deeply stupid…

Well, never mind. The point was how much October enjoyed Pavel's disturbing state. His healing was going so slowly, inhibited by the silver muzzle and collar, but had dealt with most of the deep-tissue damage from yesterday.

October wished it had been a doctor. Then it could look at wounds like this every day.

Odessa finally broke the silence. "What the hell is wrong with you, October?"

October tore its eyes off Pavel and turned to her. "A lot is wrong with me. You'll have to be more specific, babe."

"You pushed my brother into the sun!"

"It's okay," Pavel said, his vocal cords and tongue now mostly healed. "It would have happened anyway. Falkner being a maniac isn't October's fault."

"That's not an excuse." Odessa crossed her arms. "You're just as bad as those hunters."

Now was October's chance to shine, and show off its skills at histrionic attention grabbing. It could hardly keep its excitement in check as it put on yet another mask, this one made of misery and self loathing, so very different than the one it usually wore for Falkner.

"I'm sorry," it said, wiping a crocodile tear from its eye. "I was trying to help. They're violent and cruel because they think it's entertaining. Anytime I managed to perform for them, their punishments weren't quite so bad."

"Oh." Pavel had clearly fallen hook, line, and sinker. "You thought they'd think you hurting me was funny or whatever, so they'd be less violent? Is that it?"

October nodded, trying to look ashamed as it gently stroked Mira's fur. "I know I was awful. But I did warn you about them. It isn't your fault. This is just a bad situation."

"Bullshit," Odessa hissed. "Don't pretend like you care. If you did, you would have followed when Falkner and that woman shoved us down the stairs. But you decided to stay upstairs, pouring their drinks and laughing at their jokes."

"You're so fucking harsh," Pavel snapped, once again changing his whole demeanor at the drop of a hat. "I don't get it. You're never like this."

Odessa fumed for a minute, then switched to raving at her brother in another language. At first, October assumed the language was Russian, but realized its mistake when it couldn't understand a word of it. Probably Ukrainian.

"Speak English," Pavel said. "If you're going to talk about October, it deserves to know what you're saying.

"Fine!" Odessa didn't so much as consider her words before she continued raving. "It is a goddamn whore and a liar who's done nothing to help us. I don't know why you're so defensive of it. You don't owe it anything. You're too damn sympathetic."

There was a time when these words would have stung. Hundreds of years ago. But by now October had heard far worse. If anything, it was offended that Odessa couldn't come up with more creative insults than "whore".

It held Mira close to its chest, and watched the argument play out. Its emotional state would surely be far worse if not for its precious little pets.

"That's enough," Pavel said to his sister. "God, listen to yourself. You've got it all backward. We're the ones who should be trying to help October, and not the other way around."

"And why is that?"

"Because it's been here for almost a decade. Look at how we're acting after two nights. And instead of feeling bad for it, you've taken its existence as a personal attack. It sure isn't perfect but- Fuck, what do you think eight years in a hellhole like this would do to your brain?"

Odessa took a deep breath. Then another. She didn't look any more satisfied, but didn't want to accidentally say something to hurt her brother. October could hear how fast her heart was pounding against her ribcage.

"What were you doing upstairs last evening?" Odessa asked October. "And tell the truth. I can't deal with any more nonsense."

For the first time in a long time, October opted for honesty, nuzzling Mira with its cheek. "After everybody went home, Falkner wanted to screw me. And believe me, I don't get to say no. Is that what you wanted to hear? Then he fed me for the first time in months before I fell asleep."

Odessa tried to cover her mouth, but hissed in pain as she burnt her palm on the silver muzzle. "Fuck. I'm- I'm sorry. I didn't realize."

"What's the problem? After all, I'm just a goddamn whore. You said so yourself." "Well I didn't think-"

"That's right," October interrupted, reveling in getting to be so deeply unfair. "You didn't think. You never think about anything."

"Welk how was I supposed to know that he- That Falkner- I mean-"

"Spit it out."

"How was I supposed to know that Falkner has been raping you? I wouldn't have ever guessed that. It's not fair that you expect me to assume."

"I don't expect you to assume." October set Mira on the ground and watched her scamper off into a hole in the wall. "But trust me, I know I'm a whore. Refusing to sleep without someone in authority is what set me up to be murdered in the first place. I'm not making that mistake again. And I don't need the likes of you to pass judgment on me."

Odessa looked close to tears now. She was so obviously the kind of person who thought rape was somehow worse than any other crime someone could commit. As though torture paled in comparison to sexual assault.

October knew better. It had been through so much worse in its painfully long life. But if playing this card was going to get it some much deserved sympathy, or better yet, convince Odessa to shut the fuck up for once in her life, then it would play the damn card.

"Let's not have another fight," Pavel said softly. "We've all said stuff to hurt each other. Can we just get along and try to help each other now?"

Odessa nodded mutely.

"Alright," October said. "But I'm not putting my neck on the line for either of you. I've done just fine on my own." Mira fought to escape its hands, so it set her on the floor.

"That's fine," Pavel said. "Just as long as we don't fight."

And for a moment, October could almost forget that Odessa and Pavel were only here by its own request. That this whole situation was its fault, all because it had admitted to needing some company.

Its lapse in memory wouldn't last. But it was a fine to to indulge in. For now.

Taglist: @sulnusoup13 @heavenlyeden @kira-the-whump-enthusiast @excessive-vampires @pigeonwhumps @foresttheblep

#home sweet home #hart rambles #whump #pet whump #vampire whump #whump writing #Whumpblr #Whump series #Multiple whumpees #Multiple whumpers #defiant whumpee #conditioned whumpee #Nsfwhump