#i just want the conversation to happen like in a meta level | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

igotanidea · 1 year

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Shower: J.T x fem!reader

Request: from the prompt list: "for sparring to turn into sex "+ "I told you to be quiet" + "they're gonna catch us" with Jason.

@parkjammys I'm sorry in advance, I know this is probably not what you had in mind, but I just couldn;t fight the urge to play and twist those prompts a bit.

Warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI!

A/N: It's written in the Ego!verse and can be read as a next part to Growing up

***

„You got rusty” Jason smirked, while looking at Y/N’s workout simulation

„Well, I’ve been in a cast for almost two months thanks to your older brother.” She scoffed brushing hair off her forehead. As if she didn’t know it took a heavy toll on her physique. She was panting after a beginner level program and absolutely hated it. It was like a cheek.

“It was NOT my fault!” Dick objected overhearing the conversation

“That’s just some poor explanation, Y/N” Todd mocked, making her clench her fists. “And you are not going to get back to shape and get cleared for the field if you keep it so easy.”

“Why don’t you cut your girl some slack, Todd? Even if she’s not capable of kicking your ass she can always go full meta on you.“ Tim muttered from the corner, too busy to look their direction while punching a dummy, but still not dropping the opportunity to torment his older brother.

“Oh, I am fully capable of kicking his ass.” Y/N panted “Right here, right now.”

“Is that a dare?” Jason lifted the corner of his mouth, his eyes glistening predator-like, eyeing her like a prey.

“Are you chickening out?” she pouted and tilted her head “scared of a girl, Red Hood?”

“Aren’t you scared of getting humiliated in front of the whole family?” he retorted taking a step forward her

“Do you want me to go full Ego on you?” he mimicked his movement and at the moment they were just standing in front of each other, inches away, their bodies almost touching while the other members of the family stopped their own workouts and focused on watching.

“Wouldn’t you like that, princess.” He whispered leaning over her, his hot breath on her face “I got some many thoughts in my head….”

“Do you two need a room?” Dick’s voice chimed in and brought them both back to reality. It’s been a moment since they were intimate (once again, the stupid cast!) and all they needed was a spark to forget all the surroundings and get lost in each other. But the audience was definitely not needed and upon Grayson’s words they practically recoiled from each other.

“Yeah.” Jason scratched his neck awkwardly “give me a room to pin her down.”

“Wouldn’t you like that” she laughed and it made him blush a bit. Shit. He would like that, but not with his sibling around.

“If you’re so smart and bold why don’t you go at me without using your little mind games?” he hissed clenching his fist. Fuck, he wanted her and if he didn’t start blowing the steam off that very second it would start to show.

“Promise not to go easy on me, Todd?” she spun around taking a stance on the fighting mat, facing him with that arcane look. He nodded, swallowing hard. “Then it’s a deal.”

“Wait!” Stephanie yelled “I’m opening the bets! 10 bucks on Y/N!”

“10 bucks?!” Y/N scoffed “so little faith in me, Steph! That’s pretty offending!”

“That’s all I have, y/n/n/, don’t let me down.” The blonde blew a kiss her friends direction and grinned.

“Ready you two?” Grayson rubbed his hand acting like a judge on the ring “set. Go!”

Neither Jason nor Y/N moved in the slightest. They knew each other too well to take any sudden action, instead focusing on eyeing each other, calculating every gesture. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity she took tiniest step forward and the real fight burst out.

Y/N took a slide and before Jason with his tank build realized what was happening she was behind him, punching his shoulder blades and making him fall forward a bit, but still not enough to cause him to fully loose the balance.

“Backstabbing, princess?” he smirked turning to face her and throwing a punch which she blocked easily, grabbing his arm and twisting it, causing him to groan.

“Go Y/N!” Steph yelled happily and that sudden exclaim distracted her giving Jason opportunity to put his other arm around her waist and lift her in the air.

“Let go off me!” she yelled, kicking her feet desperately, hoping to reach his knee or calf, which she knew were more sensitive and prone to injury than any other part of his body, but failed at that, instead ending up being held like a unruly kid, arms pinned to her sides. “Damn it!”

“Giving up already?”

“You wish!” Y/N was quick to come up with contingencies and not only because Steph was now literally biting her nails watching the scene unravelling in front of her eyes. Since it was impossible to use her hands, Y/N swung her legs in the way Dick taught her and not without effort wrapped them around Jason’s neck ending up on his shoulders, strangling him, cutting the air supply, waiting for the familiar patting on her thigh – sign of surrender.

“Aren’t you a bit too cocky, Ego?” he hissed, trying to throw her from his back, squeezing the ankle of her freshly healed leg making her yelp in pain and loosen the grip.

A mistake which made her end up on the floor, almost losing the battle.

“That hurt you bastard!” she cried out, real tears showing in her eyes.

“I’m not falling for that love” he went forth and in a blink of an eye pressed her to the wall. Their chest touching, moving up and down frantically due to the heavy breath. Was it just because of the fighting?”

“Jason….” she whined, trying to push him away.

“Don’t play dirty.” He whispered into her ear

“ME?” she faked innocence “you are clearly the one happy to have me so close, don’t you, baby?” AUCH!” the girl screamed when he pushed her even more into the wall, his eyes absolutely dark “your family is watching….”

Fuck.

He let go for just a second and it was enough for her to use that against him. In the end he was the one who ended up on the mattress, on his back with Y/N straddling his hips and hands on his chest pinning him down and …. Well…. Feeling something there.

“You think you won?”

“I…” she didn’t get to finish the sentence when he flipped her over, hovering over, his bodyweight not letting her to get up. “Fuck….” She muttered

“You?” Jason muttered, pressing his body closer to her, whispering in her ear, making her hot and needy and all red. “I can do that….”

“Could you please stop?” Damian muttered, rolling his eyes “why is it so hard to stay professional? It’s just freaking disgusting.”

“So, seems like I won.” Todd grinned, getting up, too proud of himself about making Y/N a flustered mess on the floor.

“I hate you, Todd.” She brushed off his hand which he offered to help her up. “You almost broke my leg again!”

“You know I would never do that. Not to you, Y/N. But Riddler’s goons wouldn’t have any seconds thoughts. You need to be ready for that. “ she turned away from him, angry “Hey.” He put a hand on her shoulder and spun her around “don’t be mad at me, baby….. You know I can’t handle that.”

“Y/N!” Cass called from behind. She was the one who was watching the scene most carefully from all the siblings. Therefore she noticed the slight limp and bruising on Y/N’s ankle and had to make sure her friend was good to go “Leg?”

“I’m fine, Cass.” She sighed deeply “Sorry for making you lose the bet, Steph. Great job, Jason, congratulations, I guess.” She raised on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek briefly.

Probably last thing he needed, since instead of making him calm down the fight with her, feeling her body underneath him while pinning her down did exactly the opposite. And the feeling of her soft lips on his face only fueled him more. He needed her. He wanted her. It’s been too long since he had her.

“You did well, Y/N” Dick patted her shoulder as he walked past him “I think we all had enough for today. Let’s just hit the showers.”

“Sure….”

Y/N moved towards the bathroom, adjacent to the training room. She knew Jason never meant to hurt her, but once he got into his Red Hood mode, he was oblivious to his own strength. And while fighting she was his opponent, not his girlfriend. And she wanted him to not go easy on her.

But still, it was painful and single unwanted tear flew down her cheek.

She wiped it off, angrily and slowly started taking off her sweaty workout clothes. But before any of them could actually hit the floor, she felt hands wrapping around her from behind and let out a gasp struggling against the grip.

“Sh!” one palm covered her mouth silencing her in an instance “it’s me, baby. It’s just me.”

“Jace!” she whispered-yelled turning around to face him “what the hell are you…..?” she cut off, her eyes widening and wandering all over him. He was naked. Absolutely naked. And absolutely horny. Ready for action and the sight of him being so hard for her made her let out a moan.

“see anything you like?” he smirked so full of himself.

“Jace….” She whined, wrapping arms around his neck immediately pulling him to a kiss, pressing herself close to him.

Of course, she wanted and needed him too. Maybe even more than he needed her.

“Fuck, I missed you.” he gasped, hands wondering all over her curves, not able to satiate of the feeling of her so close, being so vulnerable in his embrace, so submissive to his every action and movement "I missed you so bad, baby.” Those calloused palms dived under the hem of her sport bra, painfully slowly lifting it up, forcing her to put her arms up and let go of him for a moment. Too long moment for her liking as the second that piece of material was gone she clung to him like a magnet.

“Mmmm.” She whined, feeling his lips on her neck, nibbling softly on the sensitive skin and massaging her breasts, pinching slightly on the pebbled nipples.

“You gotta keep quiet baby.” He smirked, now playing with the hem of her panties, caressing so close to where she needed him “Thin walls. Do you want everyone to hear you?”

“Hmmm.” She muttered mockingly taking a step back entering into the shower cabin, getting rid of her panties herself, completely exposed and motioning for him to follow “Hear us, baby. You’re not exactly the quiet type either. Come get me….” The girl whispered turning the water on, the broad stream dampening her whole body and hair.

She was never hotter.

Those lust-blown eyes, slightly reddened cheeks, plump and kiss-swollen lips …. Her body was practically screaming to him, so ready for more. She was looking at him with that sexy, lustful, seductive expression. All for his taking. With one stride he was next to her, pressing her whole body to his. Closer, closer, closer. And yet still not close enough. Her soft and silky skin, her every curve, all for him and he was not going to oppose to that gift in front of him. Passion and love consumed them both, hot water and the fogged bathroom creating the steamy atmosphere only added to those feelings an fueled them.

“Baby…. Don’t stop, please, fuck, don’t stop” her hands found a way to his hair, tangling in the soft strands and pulling gently, pressing his head and mouth to her skin. “I want more.”

“Did I hurt you?” he suddenly pulled back looking into her eyes “is your leg all right?”

“It hurts….” She whined, pouting and reciprocating his gaze with the saddest, softest expression almost begging him to take care of her. In a very specific way.

“How can I make it better?” he whispered, heavily, resuming nibbling on her neck, causing another whine to slip past her lips.

“Just keep doing what you’re doing…. be … be soft with me today.” She begged “be gentle, baby…. It’s been so long, I forgot how you feel.”

“I’ll remind you. “

“How will you remind me?” she gasped when he bit on her collarbone, hickey already forming, her core throbbing and feeling so neglected, aching.

“I’ll kiss every part of your perfect body. I’ll make you feel so good baby. I’ll get you high. Let me.”

“Take me, Jace” she moaned clawing on his broad back, his muscles tensing and flexing due to her ministration “now. Please, baby, please, I need you. I need you so bad.” she almost cried, all the sensations overwhelming her.

“Are you sure? Like you said, it’s been a while. Can you really take it?”

“Yes, yes please…. please Jason, please, please.” Tears started falling down her cheeks, masked by the streams of water on her face and he was quick to kiss all that pain away, lips brushing over her jaw and neck, nose rubbing nose before he captured her lips again. She wanted him to be gentle and he was going to comply. Just showing her all the love he had, without words, purely by action.

“I missed this.” he whispered tracing a pattern up her inner thigh, causing her to spread her legs slightly “I missed being with you like this. Away from everyone, just us.”

“Mhmmm.” She shuddered when his fingers found their destination “Just us, baby. You and me. I’m all yours.”

“And I’m yours. Tell me how to please you princess. Tell me what you need. Tell me how you need. I want to know all your little fantasies.”

“No fantasies. Not today.” She shook her head “Not here. I want it simple. Just lift me and don’t let me slip.”

“I won’t” he promised quickly catching up what, how and where she needed, grabbing backs of her thighs and wrapping them around his waist, pressing her into the wall for support, one hand on her back, the other in her hair, massaging gently, tilting her head to get access to more of her skin.

“IT’S COLD!”she let out an involuntary scream taking them both by surprise.

“SH!!” he silenced her again “I told you to be quiet! They are gonna catch us!”

“Do you really think they haven’t realized you sneaked in here the second the training session was over? Please….” She rolled eyes “besides, do you really care? Come on, you have me in the palm of your hand, baby.” She wrapped her arms tighter around him, moving slightly up and down to create any friction and make him take some action. Much to her delight it got her a groan from the back of his throat and she shuddered at that sound “I’m quite the catch, don’t you think? And you can do what you wish with that” her seductive whisper In his ear seemed to finally spur him on.

“The best.” He responded pushing in. Fighting the urge to just go all in with one thrust, but remembering what she asked him for. And instantly getting the reminder when she writhed with some discomfort, nails digging into his back. He loved that sweet pain, but was still mindful that it indicated that she was pushing past her limits.

“I won’t hurt you.” He whispered, rubbing her back reassuringly, trying to help her relax.

“I know…” she hissed feeling him push another couple inches in “I told you, it’s been….. a moment since we ….. and …. Mmmm.” The slightest frown appeared on her face and her mouth hung open for a while whilst her body started getting a memo of how good it was to have Jason inside her. How perfectly aligned they were. “Jace…..” she gasped out, already wanting and needing more.

“I can stop if you want.”

“Don’t lie to me, Jason. We both know you can’t stop at this point. And I can take it. I promise, I can take it. I want you whole. In me. Now.” she arched her back, trying to take in more of his shaft .

“You have me. I….” he hesitated. Words were still hard, but he felt the urge to say them. To assure her, that what he felt was true and that he cared for her. “I love you baby. So fucking much.” His lips found hers once more and he bottomed out with one more push swallowing her scream as her pussy fluttered around his digits so deliciously. She was right, he didn’t really care about his family overhearing them going at it, damn, he was fucking proud and bragging about being the one to make her feel good enough to scream (suck that, Grayson). But that little sucker knew that forcing her to keep her mouth shut would result in her clawing on his back again. And he wanted that. She was all his. Her body, her mind, her soul, her screams and moans, her actions.

Everything.

Jason Todd was one selfish and possessive bastard.

But still caring.

“Jace…” she panted when he finally let her lips go, allowing her to take a breath. Not that she was capable of breathing while having him like this.

“You’re good? Can I…..?”

“Just…. Just a second….” She wriggled her hips, adjusting to the stretch, causing him to groan.

“If you keep doing that I’m going to lose it.” He warned, squeezing her butt cheek.

“Oh, I am being tormented here. Forced, used, attacked from behind, abused.” She mocked tearily “poor little me.”

“Forced, baby? Abused? I can’t really see you opposing very actively.”

“Just move you little shit.” She laughed lightly, patting on his shoulder, urging him to start thrusting. And he did. Slowly, carefully. It was easy to get lost in her, but this time he was not going to rush that intimacy. They had all the time in the world. Eternity to worship each other. The external world might as well stop existing and explode and they would be perfectly happy just moving in that sensual, intimate pace, holding onto each other. Living in the bubble they created from their passion and love.

“I….” she whined, throwing her head back, resting it on the tiles and feeling the fire forming in her belly. At this point, her body was on fire and she didn’t care whether the wall was cold or not “I missed this too, Jason. Fuck, you feel so good.”

“I know….” he mumbled using the opportunity to kiss the exposed column of her throat moving towards her nipples, swirling his tongue around them, licking all the water droplets gathered there making her moan loudly “I’m fucking perfect for you.”

“Jace…..” she started moving against him, chasing her own high. She never knew that slow, soft loving could be so much better and more fulfilling than the rough, fast pace he usually set

“Hm?”

“Please…..”

“Please what?”

“Don’t stop loving me…. Just…. don’t …. ” shit, she was so close.

“I could never, baby. Just want to make you feel good.” He took a step forward, pressing her further into the wall and adjusting the grip on her back, making sure she would not slip.

“You are, but …. More. Please. Please, baby, please, oh, god” he didn’t pick up the pace but started moving harder on her almost making her snap “yes…yes, Jace, yes, baby.” She was no so loud there was not a chance those sounds didn’t echo through the whole manor. Most probably reaching not only the youngest but Alfred and Bruce as well.

Oh, well, that’s really (not) a shame.

“I thought I told you to be quiet, princess?”

“Fuck! Fuck! I don’t care! AH! Jason! Jace, baby, yes! Yes! Fuck! Please! God, baby, don’t …. So close…. Mmmm…”

“You’re gonna come for me, baby? Right now? Can you be a good girl and cum on my cock?”

“JA…..” he didn’t give her even the slightest chance to scream his whole name, pressing his mouth on her swallowing the other part of it, feeling her body shudder and shake in his arms.

She was so fragile, so vulnerable, so sensitive and so overstimulated that even when he himself came, she was still clinging onto him. Not wanting to let go. Wanting him to stay, to hold her like that, to shower (pun intended) her with aftercare, attention, affection. She just needed him close. Not in a physical way, but emotional. And if he were to pull out and get out of this freaking bathroom, out in the world, forced to face it, she would lose that part of him. She wasn’t ready to let go of her emotional Jason. Not yet.

“Stay.” She begged looking straight into his eyes. “Please, stay.”

“Baby….” He kissed her forehead, slowly dropping her to her feet, hands secured on her waist, making sure her shaky legs wouldn’t give up on her, holding her close.

“I don’t want to go there….”

“Now you scared they heard?”

“It’s not that… I…. I need you.Not the one you are with your siblings. The you¸ you are only for me” she brushed her lips over his slowly, gently “please…”

“I know. And I’m not leaving you. How could I?” he pecked her lips “but we can’t stay here forever.”

“Why?” she whined, hiding face in his chest and massaging his back “It’s nice and warm and spacious….”

“Don’t you think someone will take interest in why the water in this particular shower keeps running for hours non-stop?”

“hours, huh?” she smirked, licking her lips. She was so damn ready for round two.

“I bet it would be Alfred. Do you really want that?”

“No.” she looked down, suddenly ashamed by the thought of the family butler being a witness to their workout and forcing them out alongside with making them clean the bathroom of everything they may leave behind.

Jason kissed her temple briefly and reached behind him to grab a towel and wrap her in it, slowly helping her dry herself, smile never leaving his lips. She was looking so tiny and adorable like this. In her post-coital bliss. He wanted to remember that relaxed, peaceful look on her beautiful face.

Only when they both were dressed properly and somewhat presentable they dared to take a peek through the door, making sure no one was around. As fast as lighting and as quiet as the mouses they rushed to Y/N’s room, ready for cuddling and a movie marathon, but much to their surprise they had an unwanted guest waiting for them there.

‘You are both disgusting.” Damian hissed

“And you are here cause you wanted to say it to our faces?”

“Yes. Just letting you know. Oh, and… Y/N. You should know you actually made Steph win a bet.”

“What?” she asked in confusion, brows furrowing

“There was another. Between Brown and Grayson. She bet we would hear you. Grayson had more faith in your self-control. And he’s angry about losing. Good luck talking to him about it.”

“Oh, damn it….” Y/N whined, hiding face in hands, turning red.

“What was it that you said when I told you they are going to hear?” Jason tapped his chin “oh, right, I don’t care. Well, don’t you now?”

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sokkastyles · 11 months

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Thinking again about how Katara is portrayed in "Ember Island Players" and how a lot of her objections to the play have to do with how it portrays her as an overly emotional damsel who needs Aang to save her from her wretched existence, and the disrespect of her entire culture and people that is used to portray her as someone who needs a man to rescue her.

Which on one level you can interpret as Fire Nation propaganda, but it's also a meta commentary on the series itself, because Katara does rely on Aang as a savior figure and there are certain scenes that are specifically designed to damsel her so that Aang can be a hero.

It's interesting that the show chose to portray Katara watching herself in that position and specifically show that she doesn't like it, in the same episode that they have the real Aang act like them getting together is a foregone conclusion.

In contrast, although the play changes Katara's relationship to Zuko into something romantic and lurid, they do get one thing right about it.

And that's that Katara is the one making the choices.

Of course they also ramp up the sexuality in a way that is gross, especially considering the context of this being a FN play meant to disparage the other nations, but on a meta level it's also meant to make us, the audience, feel disgusted by a woman who makes overt sexual overtures.

I've seen people (who are anti zutara) say that the play is showing Katara as the colonized woman who falls for the colonizer, but that's not what's happening here. Zuko is not portrayed as dominant by the play, and it wouldn't make sense for the FN to portray him that way, either, since one of the purposes of the play is to portray him as a weak and ridiculous traitor who is ultimately defeated. So the joke, both in-story and the one Bryke want to make at a meta level, seems to be about Katara being more dominant than Zuko. In the play, Katara says that she felt attracted to Zuko from the moment he captured her, yet Zuko is shown shrinking from her overtures. And I just have to find it interesting that this is the joke the show wants to make in an episode where the major conflict is Aang making a pushy overture towards Katara and her rejecting it.

Zutarians frequently talk about how zutara focuses on Katara's agency. I have to agree, and I don't know what the conversations about this were at the time, but I do find it suspect that the show seems to recognize this, but decided to make fun of it at the same time. The episode posits the threat that Katara might choose someone other than Aang as a major conflict in the story, shows us a Katara who feels trapped by her role as Aang's damsel, and then makes fun of her for it and expects us to root for her and Aang to get together.

Meanwhile, we also see the real Katara and Zuko get closer in a way that feels real and organic, we see them exchange banter, we see Katara confident and able to best Zuko verbally but also able to comfort him over his fears about the play, which again focuses on her as the main actor in the relationship. Although Zuko and Katara do have that one scene of them moving away from each other in reaction to being portrayed as a couple by the play, overall their relationship remains unplagued by the insecurity that the play brings out in Katara and Aang, which seems to indicate that the problems in their relationship go beyond the play's parodies and that there is actually some truth there, that Katara really does feel like she has less choice in her relationship with Aang and that Aang seems to fear her choices.

It's really not hard to see why zutara becomes appealing in that context.

#zutara #antikataang #zuko #katara #ember island players #the boy in the iceberg

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caligvlasaqvarivm · 3 months

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how do you feel about march eridan?

Ok disclaimer before I get into it, trolls wearing dresses = great and fantastic; in fact, given that the gender differences in troll culture are so much less significant, ALL the male trolls should own some femme-ass clothes, even if it's as simple as just having a skirt version of their pants, and it's a little lame that we didn't get that.

That said, March Eridan specifically kind of annoys me because it has 0 basis in canon (aside from some shoutouts in things like ministrife sprites) but has taken over Eridan discussions so wholly that it's become widely accepted as part of his character that he's really into femme stuff when the opposite is true, and he's got some pretty major characterization tied up in the fact that he does lean so masc, and what specific type of masc he tends to present as.

So first of all, Eridan dresses up to emulate Dualscar, and this is very obvious and straightforward; if you've read the big essay I have pinned to my blog, you know that this is all a part of his basic "I have to be a big bad sea dweller or Something Bad Will Happen" suite of issues.

Thus, we can ALSO assume that the choices he made that aren't made to emulate Dualscar are reflective of his ACTUAL taste in clothing. For example, blue pants instead of purple and black - I believe that this is because Eridan likes to dress up in the blood colors of his dates; he wears a lot of blue because he's hatedating Vriska (and never quite seems to get 100% over her), and we also see this in the rings on his fingers - half of which are fuchsia, for Feferi.

So that leaves us with the glasses, shoes, and scarf. And we know why he dresses like that! It's because he's a hipster. (The scarf has an added benefit of being associated with harry potter-style wizards).

CCG: PAST YOU, PRESENT YOU, FUTURE YOU CCG: AND ABOVE ALL, UGLY SCARFNECKED DOUCHEBAG HIPSTER YOU CCG: WAIT I FORGOT, ALL OF THE YOUS ARE THAT YOU

And very specifically, a masc hipster from the era - the glasses and the ugly-ass shoes are dead giveaways. The slicked-back hair is reminiscent of that fashion style, too. He is also a douchebag. This too is important. He draws from character archetypes of the time that were generally agreed upon to be the most punchable people in existence; his introduction calls him "KIND OF A TOOL" and he consistently acts according to that. Like, I mean, just LOOK at those shades. Those are not the shades of somebody you want to be trapped in a conversation with.

A fairly accurate Eridan fashion board would look something like this:

And, like, it kind of matters that he dresses like this specific breed of pretentious male douchebag; on a meta level, that's the impression he's supposed to give the audience, and on a diegetic level, he CHOOSES to look like this because he has these kinds of interests, but is relegating them to secondary accessories.

We never hear him talk about liking hipster shit; we have to hear it from Karkat and glean it from his design. This is because, as I've talked about before, he actively distances himself from things that make him happy, things that he'd enjoy. The constant push-pull between his ACTUAL interests, and the ones he thinks he has to have because he's supposed to be a big nasty sea dweller, is a huge part of his characterization - for example, the way he keeps claiming that magic and wizards are fake and shitty, but has no less than 6 wizard statues in his respiteblock alone, and cared about his crappy wands enough to bring them onto the meteor.

So that's one of my other issues with March Eridan and the general fanon that he'd be really into femme clothes (and, by extension, fashion) - he wouldn't be forthcoming about it, even if it was true. He has a deep sense of shame and insecurity surrounding what few interests he actually has, because they feel stupid, ridiculous, and frivolous, next to the intense anxiety he has about playing the role society gave him. He's got a very strong sense of duty that makes it very difficult for him to relax and actually enjoy something. Which, you know, probably feeds into his hipster-ness - a movement often defined more by what it doesn't approve of than what it does.

Canon Eridan, when he has a choice of what to wear, overwhelmingly chooses masculine clothing with hipster connotations. And this matters, it's part of his characterization, it says something about him, the same way that it's important that Karkat dresses very simply and baggily (we all know how many insecurities Karkat has about his body) or that Sollux's bifurcation is shown in his clothes. So please please please don't misunderstand my dislike of March Eridan as me saying I don't want him in dresses; I purely dislike it because it's usually SUCH a misread of his character.

And to prove it, here's my other gripe with March Eridan stuff: all the dresses shown in the not-canon "official" artworks don't even flatter his bodytype. Why do his custom mannequins in Pesterquest have CURVES when his Pesterquest sprite doesn't?????

Please, I'm begging you, there are guides for dressing this body type, and even historical fashions that deliberately try to emulate this body type, please if you're going to dress him femme and HC that he enjoys fashion, please put him in clothes that flatter him please

I think Eridan should own some femme clothes, because on Alternia, there are very few differences between the genders, he's rich enough to afford it, and he clearly has more of an interest in fashion in general - but I think the fact that he has a clear canon preference for masculine styles is significant, and I'm really annoying, so it kind of does bothers me that this is a controversial opinion. That being said, I don't want to tell people what they Should and Should Not do, because that's lame. Who cares. He's a fictional character, let people draw him in dresses. Would be very happy if this post causes people to draw him in different styles of dresses though :pray:

#I'm not going to tag this #because also people playing around with putting Eridan in dresses is 100% harmless #and i'm not going to ruin the fun by going But The Canon Says -#i'm just really really really annoying about canon and i kind of assume people follow me for that reason #but please dont let my annoyingness hamper your fun #if you enjoy putting eridan in dresses then by all means keep doing it #peace and love and rise above

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matan4il · 1 year

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Buddie 617 meta

I’m gonna be honest here, this was one of the funniest 911 eps to me. I loved how this ep showed us both Buck and Eddie completely sucking at dating. It was very obvious in Buck’s case, what with each attempt to have quality time with Natalia being ruined by one of his past decisions, but then when he called out Eddie for also sucking at it, Buck wasn’t wrong. Eddie’s attempts seem half-hearted at best. First off, if he really wanted to date, then Tia Pepa’s help and dating apps are actually not that awful as options. Magic might happen there as well. The right person could even stand out more against a sea of not so great choices, turning the dreary experience into a colorful, magical one. But even when Eddie tries on his own, his attempts are LAME. Seriously, there are pastime activities that offer way more potential to start a conversation, and maybe a romance, than the ones Eddie chose. Not only that, these are not his actual hobbies, where he knows he’ll find someone who likes the same thing he does (the way he shares so much with one tall firefighter that we’re all thinking of right now. Eddie’s also being dumb about wanting it to “just happen” as if that’s not exactly what he got with buck. Also, just a friendly reminder that Buddie have been dating for almost 5 years, and they are GREAT at it when it’s with each other).

On top of that, we for real got a guy checking Eddie out (hi, hello, should I start a collection of him checking and being checked out by guys?) as well as him witnessing a woman he was looking at being embraced by another one. Why the hints at being surrounded by queer people? Your guess is as good as mine, but I’m here for it no matter what. ;D Now, I’ve talked before about the ongoing theme of Buddie’s dating life being intertwined in terms of when they start dating someone, or of why they break up, but now in addition to them dating at the same time, we also see them simultaneously sucking at it? Yeah, that takes the connectedness of their dating life up a notch. ~~

Which brings me to one line that grabbed my attention in this ep. THE line that offers the explicit resolution for the most important romantic plot here is the one from Gina, the insurance lady, to Chimney, about not regretting the attempt. Yes, even when the result is bad. That’s what Madney will embrace. One of the biggest obstacles to Buck and Eddie, besides their obliviousness, is the fear of ruining the good thing they have by attempting to take it to the next level. But here we have Chimney being reminded by Gina that it’s worth it, to try. Because the good thing you can have, if it works out? Is worth it. And you never have to live with the “what if” of it all. Now look at Buck and Eddie being once more adorable morons together on the job! Imagine the moment when they stop running around and let themselves try taking it to the next level, because they realize no matter what the result will be, they would never regret the attempt. ~~

Speaking of Buddie paralleling one of the canon couples on the show who were acting lovey dovey in this ep, the way Bobby described what made him and Athena happen reminded me of Buddie connecting. In both cases, there’s an intense and upsetting call, after which one of our first responders turns to find support (Buddie promising to have each other’s back) and comfort (Eddie wants to go grab something to eat together) in the other one. ~~

I did not miss Taylor Kelly, and true to form, she was back because she’s advancing her career by exploiting her personal connection to Buck and the exposure to the 118 it provided her. I’m pretty sure this basically buries any option of any showrunner ever trying to re-set these two as a romance, since it echoed and reinforced Buck’s decision to break up with her. It WAS funny to see her and Lucy cockblock Buck (I do think Lucy’s tone with which she spoke of their past also closes the door on anyone ever trying to set her and Buck up as a serious couple), but what I found to be funniest is that Buck tells Natalia he was trying to figure out the perfect place for their date, and then he took her to the bar where he kissed Lucy. A bar reminiscent of the one where he hooked up with Taylor. Possibly a spot where he hooked with other women during his Buck 1.0 stage based on how it’s THE hang out place for the 118 and we know Buck had no issues hooking up anywhere back then. Natalia, hon. This is not a good sign for your r/s with him. ~~

Speaking of which, there’s an ex who didn’t come back in this ep, but her spirit loomed large over Buck and Natalia IMO, and that is Ali. The reason why she and Buck broke up after 218 is because at the end of the day, she couldn’t accept the choices he had made in his professional life (hoping he would move on from firefighting). In the same way, Natalia revealed in this ep that she can’t accept Buck’s choices in his personal life. A small reminder the only partner we’ve ever witnessed truly seeing and accepting Buck, in every aspect of his life, has been Eddie. ~~

Another funny thing about this (911 is a comedy, y’all) is how Natalia flees the second she comes across Kameron. I mean, this is in addition to the hilarity of the death doula’s first name connecting her to birth and to all things natal, yet she flees the second that she sees a pregnant lady. Because if this is Natalia’s reaction when it comes to a bio kid that Buck explicitly said he is not going to raise, what would she do once she realizes he co-parents a fully grown kid? (and a very sassy one, too. LBR, Natalia doesn’t stand a chance in a show down with either Diaz boy) ~~

Much like Natalia doesn’t seem like the right fit for Buck based on this ep (or based on 616), neither does Marisol. Can I point out the fact that Eddie’s disapproval in the last ep of Buck dating Natalia applies here, too? They both met these women on calls. Second, Eddie wanted it to happen naturally, which is why it’s so lame he tried through all sorts of activities that he’s not ACTUALLY into and wouldn’t continue doing past the initial stage of meeting someone else. And that holds true for Marisol as well. We saw that her brother and her are very into DYI, which I guess was meant to lay the groundwork for Eddie running into her in a DYI shop. But the thing is, Eddie himself isn’t into this! Sure, he can do it, because as a single dad he’s had to, but it’s not something we’ve ever seen him being passionate about. He’s only at this store because of Christopher’s project. And then once more, just like he steps away from Pepa’s help, dating apps and chooses the wost places for a chance romantic connection, he walks away from Marisol even when the whole scene plays out as if she’s the climax of his search throughout this whole ep. This might all hint that despite initial appearances, just like the people he came across while golfing and hiking wouldn’t be the right fit, Marisol wouldn’t be either. Even more importantly, just like Ana at first appeared like she would be perfect for Eddie in 312, starting out in a “it just happened” sort of way and with supposedly being fated because she happened to guess correctly that Eddie stands for Edmundo, this thing with Marisol might look in the moment like it’s exactly what he was looking for, but it will fizzle out as well.

~~ (my weekly meta posts) (my Buddie gifs) (all of my content)

~~ My tag list will follow in the reblog, please let me know if you wanna be added/removed here.

~~ Thank you from the bottom of my heart to the incredible @whosoldherout, there are no words to describe how much I love your gifs and appreciate you!

~~ Thank you to anyone supporting these meta posts. I could never express enough how grateful I am and that they continue to exist thanks to you!

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ao3cassandraic · 10 months

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What does Aziraphale know and when does he know it? Part 3, The Fiasco

Prologue, Part 1, and Part 2, for those who need them.

Let's play an incredibly clichéd game about acting: What's My Motivation?

When Aziraphale walks back into the bookshop after his chinwag with the Metatron, Crowley's motivation is singular and steel-strong: he wants to declare his love for Aziraphale and truly launch Our Side. That's it. That's all there is.

If only things were so clear for our poor angel. If we accept my prior analysis, at this point he's got several things he needs to do, all of them in the name of thwarting the Metatron's wiles:

Like Shax, inform Crowley that something -- something still unclear, but definitely something -- is going down in the up. Up up. (Beautiful bookending here. Beautiful.)

Beg for Crowley's help to...

Make a plan to deal with it. (And he's all out of plan-juice after the demon fight in the bookshop, poor angel.)

All this without letting the Metatron know that Aziraphale doesn't trust him, didn't buy his bullshit, doesn't want to accept his job offer but may have to accept to have any chance of thwarting him (or, you know, surviving), and thinks the whole business reeks to (you should excuse the expression) high Heaven. He has reason to think this feat can be pulled off, because he knows from the chinwag that the Metatron is neither infallible nor omniscient.

So yeah, I think there's some playwright or screenwriter slogan about characters who are talking to one another having completely different conversations at the same time? Totally what's happening here.

In a truly remarkable bit of dramatic irony, Crowley, who is usually a stickler for kayfabe, has utterly dropped it -- he's being gorgeously heart-on-his-sleeve sincere -- while Aziraphale, who is often slack about kayfabe, is playacting for the Metatron's benefit like their lives depend on it. This... doesn't help them get on the same page. (Litotes. Your key to quality meta.)

Let's see how that works out for them.

As Nina and Maggie leave after blowing Crowley's brain to smithereens, Aziraphale continues taking deep breaths to pull himself together, pasting on a smile for the ladies... and, as it turns out, for the Metatron watching from across the street.

He who hesitates is lost; the determined, singleminded Crowley starts in. Aziraphale tries non-verbally to stop him. That's what the hands-out pushing-down-and-away gesture is -- with a quick sidewise glance out the window toward the Metatron, no less. But Crowley will not be stopped, so Aziraphale has to use his words -- "hold that thought."

Not "no." Not "I'm talking blithely over you for no reason." Just "not now, please, I need help." And again, I can't blame him. He does need help, urgently, because whatever bullshit the Metatron laid down about "take all the time you need," he's expecting an answer from Aziraphale (and it jolly well better be "yes" at that) and worse, he's not leaving the vicinity to wait for it.

So Aziraphale starts explaining the Metatron's offer, sounding rather forced and inarticulate. None of the bodily markers of true Aziraphalean joy are present. He's holding his torso straight and still, and his hands are not doing the shoulder-level wave of joy -- they're doing the aimless-gesture dance of anxious confusion.

He says, "The Metatron... you know, I don't think he's as bad a fellow -- well, I think I might have misjudged him."

When Aziraphale's happy, he tosses around words like "nice" and "kind" and "good." Did y'all hear any of those words? I didn't. I heard another covert call for help: I misjudged the Metatron, Crowley, he's not as bad as I thought -- he's so, so much worse! And he rather reasonably thinks Crowley will pick up on this because they've played a lot of rounds of the kayfabe clue-dropping improv game over the millennia, the last round not fifteen minutes ago.

Then Aziraphale recounts the chinwag. His words appear accurate (the cuts back and forth to the chinwag itself are pretty seamless), though again, we don't know what he might be leaving out.

Crowley is distracted from his purpose by the raised bribe. "He said what?!"

If I'm Aziraphale in this moment, with the Metatron all but physically dragging me back to Heaven, I would want Crowley with me there in the worst way! Going to Heaven together, rather than Aziraphale alone, might be the start of a plan capable of thwarting the Metatron! So I don't think Aziraphale's starry-eyed statement of the offer is about wanting to change Crowley (though the implication absolutely is there for us to pick up on and dislike). I don't think it's about keeping Crowley safe, either -- anyplace with the Metatron in it is categorically not safe. It's a "yes, actually, this might work! do you think it'll work? will you come with me and see?"

Aziraphale then puts on the unhappiest happy-news performance ever. No happy hands. No shoulder shimmies. His voice is in its highest, most anxious register. His smile is decidedly tense and kayfabe-y.

Over the next part of the fiasco, Aziraphale figures out that Crowley hasn't picked up the kayfabe phone; the angel's face visibly falls as he listens to Crowley rant. Crowley's taking all this seriously -- which is also reasonable; Crowley's being honest and Aziraphale, historically, mostly ignores kayfabe. And this is a problem, because Aziraphale still needs Crowley to locate a clue, still needs a plan, still needs help.

So Aziraphale calls back to the s1 bandstand: he starts telling the same old whoppers about good and evil and Heaven and Hell, whoppers so transparent to Crowley (and likely enough to fool the Metatron, what with his contempt for everyone ever) that Crowley must pick up on the kayfabe, mustn't he? Mustn't he?

But he doesn't. Crowley doesn't pick up on it. (Again, fair. He's had to put up with centuries of Aziraphalean unexamined self-righteousness.) He just says "Tell me you said no," with a strong undercurrent of "if you actually care for and value me, you bloody well said no."

And Aziraphale can't, because the Metatron is watching, explain that he didn't say no because the Metatron was not taking no for an answer, and because Aziraphale himself doesn't know what to do, which response will lead to a Metatron-thwarting. He's running out of kayfabe lines to say that will get Crowley back onside, and this desperation shows in his face and his two or three fruitless attempts to speak, before he finally says, sincerely to my ear, that he could make a difference.

Which is what he's trying to do! It's his motivation! He wants to make a difference by thwarting the fucking Metatron! Which may well mean going back to Heaven!

But this isn't the meaning that Crowley hears (and a lot of us missed it too, me included at first -- no shade, Gaiman and Sheen did a lights-out job of trick-with-the-truth with that line). Crowley hears that Aziraphale wants to go work with the Metatron to do Heaven's will, and he'll trample Crowley's very identity to do so. So Crowley, still singleminded, still determined, now as desperate as Aziraphale to be understood, finally forces himself as close as he can get to a declaration of love.

Watch Aziraphale as Crowley declares them a team, a group. He glances out toward the Metatron again. He looks anxious and unhappy, hardly the face of an angel whose long-time unacknowledged partner is finally acknowledging their partnership. This isn't what Aziraphale needs just then. Just then, Aziraphale needs Crowley's help, and he can't for the life of him figure out how to tell Crowley that without tipping off the Metatron to the kayfabe. He's failed at it how many times by now?

Then Crowley pulls a second bandstand: "we can just go off together." Aziraphale, as other meta-ists have noted, can't say yes to this any more than he did in s1. He's got a Metatron to thwart! So he shakes his head, and he begs Crowley to come with him, repeating that they can make a difference. That's sincere! He wants them to! But, to my ear, there's still a teensy bit of possible kayfabe in there, with "second-in-command." That just rings false.

"You can't leave this bookshop." "Oh, Crowley. Nothing lasts forever." Kayfabe, kayfabe, kayfabe -- Aziraphale is a guardian and an avowed and demonstrated preservationist. This line is for the Metatron to buy and Crowley to finally do a proper WTF about.

And Crowley WTFs, all right, but in the wrong way, putting on his shades and heading for the door. Now Aziraphale is truly desperate -- he tries to call Crowley back, and he tells another part of the truth: "I NEED YOU!" To help. To thwart the Metatron.

And yet another part of the truth, duly kayfabed, with the angel starting to be a bit irked at Crowley's stubborn misapprehension: "I don't think you understand what I'm offering you." Namely, a chance to thwart the Metatron.

Crowley sure doesn't. He suuuuuuuuuuuure doesn't. He's still having a completely different conversation. Aziraphale gives up in exasperated despair: "then there's nothing more to say." And on his face at that moment: calculation and displeasure, because he still has a Metatron to thwart and it's looking like he'll have to do it alone.

Only Crowley has more to say, about the absence of nightingales and us-es. And Aziraphale's face is all are you fucking kidding me with this shit? Aziraphale still has a Metatron to thwart, and if Crowley won't help, the least he can do is get out of the way, as Aziraphale made him do in their earlier argument over helping Jimbriel.

He looks away, giving Crowley the chance to jump him, haul him in by the lapels, and kiss him. Because that's the conversation Crowley's been having all along.

If I'm Aziraphale in this moment, my brain is exploding in several directions. I have a Metatron to thwart. He's watching this drama from across the street. What is he thinking, and how do I deal with him now? I don't have Crowley's help to thwart him. With that in mind, do I accept or refuse the job offer? I have finally figured out the urgency of the conversation Crowley thought we were having. I'm so terribly sorry I didn't make any gestures toward that conversation, because -- Crowley is actually kissing me, there aren't enough WTFs in the entire history of the entire universe for this!

No wonder his hands are tentative. No wonder the camera doesn't let us see much of his face; the above is a lot to convey for even the mega-ultra-talented Master of Microexpressions Michael Sheen.

Aziraphale, shocked and irked and scared and brain-exploded and feeling new things, tries kayfabe (mixed with truth; he is direly irked at Crowley's obtuseness) one last time: "I forgive you." Surely this time Crowley's got to --

But no. Still no uptake. Crowley leaves. Fiasco complete.

Next post will be the last: The Aftermath. Plus some comment on this as, in my view, the most parsimonious and narratively accommodating read on the scene, ergo (again, in my view) the likeliest.

#gos2spoilers #gos2 spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #the fucking metatron #the final fifteen minutes #good omens meta #good omens #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands

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luxaofhesperides · 7 months

Note

ghostlights prompt with "it's okay, you're safe now" hurt/comfort?

It takes over a month to find Danny.

Thirty seven days of panic and ever growing dread, searching for him every single day. Duke hasn’t felt this way since he was in foster care, running away from whatever home he got placed in to search for his parents.

The first week was spent trying to find any trace of Danny, working on nothing but his last few messages and a voicemail he left Duke, where all he said was a whispered, Call me back when you can. I might just be paranoid, but I think someone’s following me. I’m walking home right now. I… I don’t know, I feel a little sick, Duke, I— And then static before the voicemail ends.

There hadn’t been any sign that Danny made it home. No cameras caught sight of him after he walked past a bus stop. No one around on the streets to tell him what happened.

One moment, Danny was there. The next, he was gone.

He had to recruit the rest of the Bats into searching for Danny, and his guilt of outing Danny as a meta (half ghost, as Danny called himself) was easily buried under his desperation. Duke knows the statistics. The chances of finding someone after three days drop drastically, and after enough time, it’s safe to assume they’re dead even if people keep searching.

Jason promised to interrogate some traffickers moving outside of Crime Alley, updating Duke weekly on any other kidnappings that might be related to Danny’s case. Tim had been checking around Danny’s neighborhood, slipping in and out of spaces to gather information, leaving behind cameras and bugs on the off chance the kidnappers came back to the area. Barbara hacked her way into the messages of traffickers, trying to find any mention of Danny. Even Bruce had gotten involved, looking into Danny’s background to see if there was anyone that might be connected to his disappearance.

Vlad Masters wasn’t a lead. He had no idea Danny was missing when they called, and he ended the call immediately to begin his own search.

Thirty seven days.

Duke didn’t want to lose hope, but all he could think about were the empty spaces in his life where Danny once was.

And now, on the thirty eighth day, Duke jerks awake as his cell phone rings at max volume and he scrambles to get it. He’s not risking another missed call, not after Danny disappeared.

He doesn’t have time to say anything once he accepts the call before Jason is saying, “We found him Duke. Babs is sending the location to the GPS of your motorcycle. Suit up and meet us here.”

“Is he okay?”

“He’s…” Jason hesitates. “He’ll live. But these fuckers did a number on him, from what we've read in their files. We’re waiting for you and the others to get here, and then we’ll take them out while you get your boy to safety.”

“I’m on my way,” Duke says, already pulling his suit out to get changed. He hasn’t bothered to bring it to the Batcave for weeks, spending most of his time out on the streets as the Signal. It’s just easier to have it on hand than to go to the Batcave to suit up, or to leave it in the Hatch. He chucks his phone back onto his bed and is jumping out the window of his apartment just a minute later, dropping down to street level just as his motorcycle pulls up on the street.

He’ll have to remember to get Babs a gift basket or something when this is all over. It’s the least he can do after she’s helped him so much over the past month.

“Thanks, Babs,” Duke says into his comm, switching it to a private line with Oracle. She hums an acknowledgement, but otherwise doesn’t respond. Not that Duke has much in him for conversation; all his focus is on Danny, Danny, Danny.

The GPS on the motorcycle leads him to the outskirts of GCU campus, in one of the buildings that had been closed off after a fire earlier in the year that they still haven’t fixed due to the amount of mobsters who liked to pass through it, using it as a drop sight for arms deals. Red Hood leans on the chain link fence surrounding it, watching as he approaches.

Duke all but jumps off the motorcycle to reach Red Hood, barely remembering to turn on the cloaking to hide it from sight.

“Where is he?”

“Basement,” Red Hood answers, and even through the helmet, Duke can hear the tightness in his voice that means he’s doing his best to hold back his rage. “Red Robin and the Batgirls are in there, getting Oracle access to their computers. They’re going to make sure no one slips by us. I’m going to make them wish I had been kind enough to kill them, and you’re going to take your boy straight to the Batcave where the Doc is waiting with Alfred.”

It’s not much of a plan, but Duke trusts the others to do what they need to do. All he cares about is getting Danny out of there.

“Lead the way.”

They scale the fence easily, and there’s no one on the upper levels when they walk in. Not even a single camera to alert anyone to their entrance. Red Hood leads him down a stairwell, ignoring the way the shadows around them move on their own, Duke’s agitation making them twist into some dark nightmare.

He sees the flicker of light as soon as they step out into the basement hallway. All the light bulbs above their head are broken, covering the floor in sharp glass, and doors going down the hall are all left open, some barely hanging onto their hinges. The building is a wreck, graffiti decorating portions of the wall, and it looks abandoned. He would bet even mobsters avoid coming down here; it’s all sorts of health hazards.

Normally, he’d be cautious. He would sneak through the wall, sticking to the shadows and staying hidden as he went deeper in, ready for anything.

Duke hasn’t been thinking clearly in weeks. He sees the light, the soft white glow he associates with Danny, and tears after it like a man possessed.

Distantly, he hears Red Hood curse behind him, and then he’s turning the corner, feeling the familiar burn in his eyes as his powers kick in and let him see the small ball of light flickering weakly as it guides him through the basement level.

Red Robin and Batgirl’s voices fill his helmet and Duke doesn’t waste a second in muting his comm; if there’s a problem, they can work it out with Red Hood. Now that he’s so close to Danny, he’s not letting anything get in his way.

The first guy he runs into is a surprise. Clearly a scientist, judging by the lab coat and the notebook in his hands, paired with the dark circles stamped beneath his eyes. He barely has time to open his mouth, looking alarmed, before Duke slams into him, tackling him to the floor and knocking him out with a quick hit to the temple.

A vent in the ceiling falls down, and Red Robin pops out.

“They’re keeping him in the back, locked in. I’m warning you now, it’s not a pretty sight.”

“I don’t care,” Duke snaps, “I’m getting him back.”

“We’ll clear the way and keep them from stopping you,” Red Robin says.

He whips out his bo staff and sprints away, kicking in a door. Duke follows after him, ignoring the yells from the other scientists gathered in there, leaving them to Red Robin’s tender mercies.

The light leads him to a room hidden away in the lab, a small window in the door that is too dirty to see through. The door is locked, so Duke feels out the shadows around him and uses one to slip into the room.

And Danny’s there.

Danny, never without a smile, glowing and funny and so, so sweet, is lying curled up on the floor. There are shackles around his ankles, keeping him trapped in the room with the chain nailed into the wall. His wrists are bound in meta suppressant cuffs, leaving him weak and vulnerable. That’s not the worst thing.

The worst thing is the visible wounds Duke can see on him, sluggishly bleeding. There are blood stains all over the floor, cuts along his arms and thighs, clothes torn into nothing but dirty rags. There’s a large incision on his chest, going down from his collarbone to his navel, hastily stitched together in a way that only keeps it slightly closed, the stitches loose enough to be pulled out with a single pull.

As if sensing his gaze, Danny blinks his eyes open, staring at the space next to Duke. Slowly, his gaze slides over, eyes hazy with pain and exhaustion. He opens his mouth, but no sound comes out.

Duke kneels next to him, pulling off his gloves to cup Danny’s cheek as gently as he can.

“Hey,” he whispers, overcome with both grief at the pain Danny had to go through, and relief at finally finding him. “Hey, it’s okay, you’re safe now.”

Danny doesn’t try to speak again. Instead, he closes his eyes and leans into Duke’s touch, relaxing.

“I got you honey, it’s alright. I’m gonna get you out of here and take you to some people who can patch you up.”

He slides his arms beneath Danny’s body, lifting him into his arms.

He doesn’t remember much of what happens next; it’s all a blur of movement and feeling blood slide over his hands. Later, he’ll hear the others give their report, telling of how they found Danny following the trail of a university professor bragging about a paper that would make him famous for a deeper understanding of meta biology. They’ll recount their scouting, the information they stole, how many people they fought and captured. They’ll talk about how the shadows completely overwhelmed the basement when Duke left with Danny, traveling through shadows at a speed he had never achieved before, going farther than he’s ever been able to.

Leslie and Alfred input their own medical reports of the torture done to Danny and how long he’ll need to be in recovery, checking for infection and possible side effects to his powers.

All of that will be important later.

Duke doesn’t care about anything at all when he’s finally able to return to Danny’s side once Alfred and Leslie are done patching him up. The weight that’s been on his shoulders for the past thirty seven days is gone. The sight of Danny’s blue eyes fluttering open is the most beautiful he’ll ever see.

“Hey, honey,” he says softly, holding Danny’s hand as he wakes.

Danny smiles at him. “Duke,” he whispers, “I knew you’d find me.”

“Always, honey. Always.”

. . .

[send me a ghostlights prompt!]

#ghostlights #dc x dp #dp x dc #dcxdp #dpxdc #prompt fill #my writing #mostly hurt not much comfort but just imagine duke cuddling danny and hand feeding him after this!!!#thank u for the prompt!! very happy to make this the first prompt fill to buff up the ghostlights tag

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polyamorousmood · 22 days

Note

Hey there :)

So I have no problem with my bf dating other people, and recently hes started having sth with someone else. Good for them! Legit, no problem with that by itself

But.. now I'm being left on read a lot, like majority of the time it feels like, no matter the topic or time. I just feel.. forgotten, I think, or replaced idk. But it feels pretty bad.

I dont want them to think I'm jealous or mad, I just wish he would still show me the same attention/care as before. Ive talked about how left on read makes me very insecure, due to fake friends and person past experiences before so I dont want to bring it up again.. but it hurts. Idk what to do?

Bad news, babe. You're gonna have to say something again. The good news though is that you can productively procrastinate it, because there's some stuff I want you to do first.

But before I get into that, I let having a cool opening distract me from very important other things that need said: That sucks, and I'm really sorry, but you can make it through this.

Now then. Time to productively procrastinate a difficult conversation. Look, I'm procrastinating it more by making it a read more! (It, um, it is A Lot. I took "blogging platform" literally on this one😅)

It sucks. Believe me, it bothers me too when I can't hear from my partner📵📴 because they're with my meta. It has been A Problem I've had to work through, so I think I'm actually pretty qualified to give advice on this.

Some of what I have to say is going to smart (old-timey word for sting) a bit, so I want to make it clear that I understand where you're coming from, so you can trust the part that stings is necessary. I imagine its something like this:

You relationship with your boyfriend is great! So great, you're happy for him to have someone else to love! That's. That's so rare and incredible, its a love beyond what most will know. And then he takes that love and wads it up and throws it in the back seat to make room for this new schmuck. The love is still there, it's just... in the back seat. And you never thought that would happen, because the relationship is so good! And you already said something, so you worry you're being a nag, which you don't want, because you ARE happy for them, you're so happy for them... except when you're not because you can't be happy when he can't be bothered to text you back. Its not really so much to ask, and you EXPLAINED why its important to you, so why doesn't he seem to care? You communicated, you did your part, and it was hard and scary! Surely harder than texting you back would be! And you don't want to feel like this, but. There's this anxiety that... shouldn't he want to text you back? Isn't that how he would act if he really did still care about you just as much?

Any of that resonate? I don't know you, so maybe some of it was way off base🎯, I don't know. But I hope enough of it was close enough to right that you know I get it when I say:

This isn't just your boyfriend fucking it up. This is, in part, probably you asking something unreasonable. To give you the exact same level of time an energy as when it was just you too is a big ask. To be able to supercede his time with the other person any time you want is a big ask. If you're only okay with your boyfriend having someone else if it doesn't cut into your time at all, how okay with it are you actually?

So before you talk to him about it, you gotta step back. Its not that you're wrong for feeling sidelined. But a poly relationship just isn't going to be the exact same as a monogamous one. It it were, I wouldn't have bothered making a blog, and I wouldn't have needed to because I wouldn't have a trail of loving, wonderful, burnt to ashes monogamous relationships behind me. Let's take a deep breath together. Pause here if you need.

Now, there are some questions here that do affect what I think would be fair. For example, if you're living with your boyfriend, and he's taking you for granted, always texting the other person when he's with you, you don't have any special time with him anymore, and then when he goes out its radio silence. That's a very different situation from you being in a long distance relationship so texting is your main form of communication/bonding and now he's got a new person that lives near him so he's with them constantly and now, what are you, chopped liver? for example. I'm going to give a list of things you might be doing that's unfair, and I want you to take a minute and evaluate as honestly as you can where you fall on that. This is a self-reflection, not an accusation, so please resist any temptations to get defensive (if you even feel them). I recommend taking out a pad of paper and committing to an answer for each. Some you may not be doing at all! Some okay maybe a little. And some now that you think about it, yeah actually, you're doing a lot. That's okay. You not handling it perfectly is okay, and doesn't mean we can't ask the boyfriend for accommodations still.

Are you valuing 1:1 time with your boyfriend as much as you're valuing (negatively) the time he spends 1:1 (not texting you) with his partner? IE, are you more bothered by him not texting you than you are appreciative when he takes time for you?

Are you texting him compulsively out of anxiety instead of because you have something more important to discuss?

Are you accidentally infringing on his other partner's time?

Are you trying to infringe on his other partner's time to reassure yourself that you're important to him?

Are you texting him to "test" him?

When you communicated that you didn't like being left on read, did you properly convey how big of a problem it is for you and what your expectations were?

When you communicated, did you allow space for negotiation and to work on the problem, or was it more like a list of demands?

Are you misplacing your feelings somehow? Is there something else that's bothering you that you don't feel comfortable bringing up?

Are you letting your anxieties run you? Is there something you could be doing to address your feelings?

Are you forgetting to weigh other allocations or shows of love he's making or you?

Is there anything else internally you might be overlooking in regards to this?

Whew! Heavy stuff. But you made it!🎉 Now, we'll dig into how his actions are making you feel. That last set was about what you could be doing better, and this one will help determine he could be doing better. But just like we weren't making accusations about you, we aren't making accusations about him either. We are assuming good faith on your boyfriend's part. This is still ultimately about your feelings and what reasonable accommodations could be made for them.

Do you feel the time allocation for you vs his other partner is fair? Why?

Does he seem to text them back more than you?

Does it seem like he's not taking your concerns seriously enough?

Does this issue look like a larger pattern? If so, what? How will that look long-term?

Has he made specific promises he hasn't kept to you in regards to this? If so, what were they and how hasn't he lived up to them?

Do you feel he's made adequate time for you to discuss concerns, or do you feel like he tries to rush through them?

Do you think he gave you a reasonably clear expectation of what him dating someone else would look like (or did he make it seem "nothing will change")?

Has he not responded to something critical?

Is there anything else he's done in regards to this that doesn't sit right with you?

You did it! 🎉Now we can officially start working on problem-solving. I imagine that was a lot more than you bargained for, for such a simple problem as "I want a text back," but its important to get everything laid out. This helps in a lot of ways. It helps guard against striking on a "solution" that isn't actually sustainable. It makes sure you're starting a discussion in good faith. And hopefully, it will help minimize having to return to the issue.

For the sake of formatting, we're going to address the questions for you first, then the questions about him, then how to have the hard conversation, then workarounds that you may not have considered that aren't really your or his problem. I actually think that third group has some of the better "quick fixes", if you can find one that works.

Starting with the questions about what you could be doing better, in order, skip any that don't apply:

Re: valuing 1:1 time -- Make active efforts to appreciate the time you do have more. Use this time as a guard against negative thoughts when he is unable to respond ("We spent all day together yesterday, a few hours today without hearing from him is fine")

Re: texting compulsively -- Be more vigilant about self-soothing. I find self-talk to be most effective for me. I cannot possibly cover everything here, but it sounds like it stirs up fears you're losing your partner. Since you cannot guarantee that will never happen, I find it most helpful to reassure myself I will be okay even if I do lose them. Another option is to make a reassurance bank, where you can store and see evidence of his affection without asking it from him. Your mileage may vary. If you really struggle with this, there's always therapy.

Re: accidental infringing -- Be more mindful of what you send. Save things that are non-urgent to discuss later, when you have his attention anyway.

Re: deliberate infringing -- Stop it. It will only strain things and make the outcomes you don't want more likely. See self-soothing. Find something else to distract you that you can put energy into.

Re: "testing" him -- See above. I know, its easier said than done. Do the hard work. That shit can ruin your life.

Re: didn't adequately express importance -- Well, its a good thing we're about to talk about it anyway! Really think through how you can explain how badly it makes you feel. We'll get into that more when we discuss How To Have the Conversation

Re: list of demands -- Well, its a good thing we're going to talk about it anyway! This time, see it as a negotiation. Ask him if that's feasible, or if its too much. But open to trying alternate solutions.

Re: misplaced feelings -- Take the advice on How To Have a Conversation and apply it to the thing that's actually the problem.

Re: managing anxieties -- Again, you'll have to find a way to self-soothe somewhat. That's not to say your partner shouldn't meet you halfway, but you do have to do your half.

Re: forgetting other expressions of love -- Literally make a list of all the things he's done/is doing for you. As many as you can think of. Add to it often. Pick a couple and do a deep dive on why that mattered so much to you and how you felt. Tell him, too. You gotta be grateful consciously, bro. This applies to all of life

Re: anything else -- Take that into account. Work on that, too, however you can. Be honest with him about your shortcomings when you address it.

A lot of these will require upkeep on your part (kind of mirrors🪞how texting you back consistently requires upkeep on his, huh?). Be prepared to discuss the changing you're going to make and have an actionable plan for them. Okay, his turn, same as before:

Re: fair time allocation -- does he need to make more time for you? Do he need to make protected time that is only for you? You said you feel forgotten, replaced, so maybe this is part of it.

Re: unequal texting -- first, consider why. If he lives with you, he's probably going to have to text the other person in front of you sometimes. If you still think its too much, again, protected time for you may be appropriate, he may need to do a better job keeping his New Relationship Energy (NRE) in check. Be prepared to discuss this, possibly including him defending himself!

Re: not taking concerns seriously -- Well, its a good thing we're discussing this again! Make sure you have an actionable, measurable metric he can do to show you progress here. (IE ❌"I need you to care more" ❌ but ✅"When you're unable to respond, I need you to say that you're busy so I know you thought of my needs" ✅)

Re: bigger patterns -- You will have to tell him you're concerned about those too. If it could become untenable for you, this will probably be a recurring discussion. Consider scheduling check-ins where you say one thing you think is going well and one thing you're worried about, for example.

Re: unkept promises -- here, you are super justified in being mad. Try not to be anyway. Try to be curious and interested in addressing the root problem. Ask him what got in his way, what middle ground he's confident he can manage. It is you and him vs the problem, even here, not you vs him.

Re: inadequate room to discuss -- Set expectations before the talk, and remind him of them if he forgets. (IE "I know this isn't nice to hear, but I need you to let me say my piece and talk through solutions, even if it takes awhile." and "I said I needed to talk through the solution. This sounds nice, but I'm concerned about X. How can we make sure that doesn't happen?") Consider reserving specific time to discuss it, consider reserving recurring time to discuss any problem, if you need it.

Re: didn't set expectations appropriately -- ask. Ask what this would ideally look like to him. If he's having trouble getting started, point out some differences you've already noticed, and ask if he thinks those are the new norm.

Re: didn't respond to something critical -- Establish a way he can see what is critical and what isn't. This might be texting something that can wait, but calling for something important, for example.

Re: anything else -- address that too. Give him a chance to explain himself. etc.

Okay, you've done everything up to this point alone. You're prepped. Now How Do You Have The Conversation?

For this type of stuff, I recommend the WIBS format. That is, "When [something happens], I feel [feelings] Because [explanation] So could you please [change]". But of course, it can't be that simple either. Critically you CANNOT say "you" before the "so could you please". The example I'm about to give is going to use the texting issue specifically, but if you've done the soul searching and found there's a bigger problem you want to address (which ngl, sounds like there might be something bigger based on what you sent), adjust accordingly! This is good general advice for any tough conversation. Anyway, here's what that might look like on the texting thing:

"When I am left on read, I feel anxious and betrayed, because I've had a lot of friendships completely fall apart, and that's always how it started. So could you please make a point to text me something when you read my message, even if its just 'lol' or you saying you want to discuss it later."

But wait a minute! That doesn't include any of the bullshit I just made you do. What the hell am I trying to pull? Okay okay, so we have to modify this a bit. Our new format is going to be something more like this: "When [something happens], I feel [feelings and impact], because [explanation]. I have tried [things you've tried], and I am still struggling because [reason why that hasn't helped, including what you could do better]. So I was hoping to look at some more solutions, like, would you be willing to try [change]." Which might in practice look something like

"When I am left on read, I feel so anxious and betrayed I start spiraling thinking the relationship is doomed, because I've had a lot of friendships completely fall apart, and that's always how it started. I have tried dropping some hints and self soothing, and I'm still struggling because this is a really bad anxiety that I didn't have to deal with before recently and even with the hints I'm not getting the response rate I would like. So I wanted to talk about it and see if you'd be willing to try making a point to text me something when you read my message, even if its just 'lol' or you saying you want to discuss it later."

And then! The discussion continues. Maybe he says "oh my god, yeah, I didn't realize it was bothering you that much, absolutely I can do that" and maybe he says "I'm with you all the time how is this still a problem?" or maybe its "actually, [other partner] gets really anxious when I text, which is why I don't respond unless its important. I figured I could talk to you about dinner plans any time" and whatever the case is, you keep talking until you've set on clear goalposts and have reassurance they feel okay to all parties. So in order, your responses might be something like "are you sure you can manage that? I was really worried by my hints not being picked up on that that was the reason", "I know its a problem. That's why I'm talking to you about it. If that's not a good solution to you, let's come up with something else, because the way things are is really hard on me," and "okay. I don't want to make [other partner] anxious either, but this isn't working for me, can we find something else to try?"

Allow him to explain, be prepared to explain more yourself, and be willing to try a variety of solutions. Acknowledge

Is this my longest post yet? Maybe! Wild. Let's top it off with something easier: The Hack Solutions🧑‍💻. Sometimes, anxiety isn't logical, and goofy workarounds can be super helpful! Here are some off the top of my head, but feel free to get creative, too! Not all of these may be feasible, not all of them may help. But a lot less work than some other solutions so worth mentioning!

You said being "left on read" is what bothers you. Can you just... turn off read receipts? Or switch to a messaging app that doesn't have them? Can he just not read your texts until he has the time to respond?

A lot of phones have a driving mode, that will send an automated reply to texts. Can he turn that on when he's with his other partner so you get a reply like "hey I'm busy rn, but I'll text back later!" and would that help?

If you just want to feel more involved, maybe it would help if he just like, took a picture of his pizza to send to you. Reminds you you're thought of, doesn't require conversation.

Something that I've done with friends is write like, a dozen short affirmations/reassurances, and have them keep them in a special spot. When they need to feel loved, they can take one out to read. This has worked PHENOMENALLY for them, and still protects your partner's time away while allowing you to get love direct from your partner WHENEVER you want.

Can he just kick it with you both concurrently?

Can you have a friendship with your meta where you text THEM like "tell [bf] to text me back real quick" and then your bf doesn't feel bad about texting in front of the other partner because they're telling him to do it?

Classically condition yourself. Like, every time he leaves you on read, eat a chocolate. And then sometimes instead of it being "boyfriend won't text me :(((" it'll be "oooo! candy time!"

ai yai yai! That's all I have, though! Come back if you need help working through some specifics. I'm very happy to help however I can. Its not your fault you're struggling with this. Most polyam relationships have to deal with this to some extent, but with a little effort, you can make it through. Best of luck to you, friend. 💙💖🖤

#poly relationship advice #ask box is always open #long post #polyamory #jealousy

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lover-of-mine · 9 months

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I'm gonna start this off by saying that this has been ping-ponging around my head like that old dvd screensaver, quicking around and getting more unhinged every time it hit a corner since April. And while this is a meta on the cemetery scene in Death and Taxes, I will be going back and forth in the whole show, so I don't know, buckle up, grab your delusional juice, and come with me if you feel like it.

First thing about that scene is that it tries to make you think about the equine therapy conversation in Dumb Luck.

They are in a location we have never seen before and probably will never see again, the outfits are similar, and even the circumstances of the conversation could be read as close to each other, considering Eddie wasn't doing well after almost dying, Buck is definitely not handling his death well. I made a way too detailed meta about the cinematography of buddie during Eddie's breakdown era (you can read it if you want more details) but the main thing about the dumb luck conversation is that Eddie is finally letting Buck in after continuously shutting him down when he tried to offer help and that's reflected on the way they filmed the scene, the way they are talking, moving, positioned in the frame. It's about Buck reminding Eddie that there's hope after all. Considering the moment Buck's in, with them alluding to that conversation, you would've expected for them to do a similar thing with Buck, right? That this scene going to give Buck the same type of peace the equine therapy talk gave Eddie.

But it doesn't. One thing that's kind of a pattern with Buck, Eddie, and Eddie reassuring Buck (if you could call 2 scenes a pattern) is that they have Buck looking up at Eddie (I also talked about this in more detail here if you're interested) but that's interesting because of Buck's height, he's the tallest person in the room, so he's not usually looking up at people, but something about Buck as character is that he has the tendency to sit in higher places, so he's always higher, and he even picked a place where he can sleep in a high spot.

But when he's getting reassurance from other people in his life, they are both usually sitting down, at the same eye level.

But when he goes to Eddie for reassurance, Eddie is standing up and Buck is sitting down, so Buck is literally looking up at Eddie when he goes to Eddie for advice. And Eddie is always focused on Buck, in Home and Away, Eddie is reasoning with him, and in Recovery Eddie is trying to give Buck what Buck is asking while not pushing his boundaries.

Why is that relevant here? Well, Buck spends the whole conversation in the cemetery trying to get Eddie to look at him and Eddie spends most of the conversation looking forward so he won't have to.

And that alone is very interesting because Eddie is always looking at Buck. I could legit put 100 screenshots here to prove it. So the fact that Eddie can't look at Buck here, means something. Because Buck wants Eddie to be on his side, he needs Eddie to tell him he's doing the right thing, but the way he's talking is making Eddie shut down.

Buck wants answers, right? He wants the easy way out. He died, he has feelings about it he doesn't want to deal with, so he's looking for whatever answers he can get so he won't have to. But the way he's talking sounds a lot like the way Eddie talks to him in Kids Today when he drops Christopher off with him before the tsunami. Very you're alive, get over it thing Eddie had going that ended with him literally destroying everything he had. So, like, we know that's not the way to go about near-death experiences, it doesn't end well because the pressure has to go somewhere and let's face it, Buck has never dealt with anything that happened to him ever. He can't just keep moving past the shit he's been through, at some point, that's gonna catch up to him.

But the thing about the actual content of the conversation is the way that Eddie tries to do the thing he usually does, reason with Buck, "been down that road, don't recommend it" or "or you don't know her the way he does" or "now am I allowed to ask how you are", because it's how they work, but Buck shuts him down with the "I feel like she sees me, like she really sees me for who I am" because that threw Eddie off balance in their relationship, in their friendship really, considering they way they showed us buddie from in a flash to mixed feelings, Eddie is trying his best to be someone Buck relies on, the way we've seen him rely on Buck through his trauma recovery. And one thing we see Eddie constantly do is back away so he won't get hurt once things get too intense. He puts space between him and whatever is bothering him, he ran to LA to escape his parents' judgment (and to be closer to Shannon but his parents played a part there), he kept Shannon at arm's length through most of the time she was back in his life before she died, he kept pushing Buck away after the lawsuit, he pushes everyone away really before his PTSD took him down. Dude retreats from the fight if he's not sure and Buck throws him off balance. Because up until this moment, Eddie thinks he's helping, but we see him realize he was wrong and shut down in real time.

He's still trying, but his thing now is agreeing with Buck. This gif has 11 seconds, black and white because I wanted the whole thing in one gif, but Buck is trying to get a reaction out of him, but Eddie already moved to a whatever you say buddy mode. AND EDDIE JUST WON'T LOOK AT BUCK.

So Buck wants to know if he's doing the right thing, Eddie is agreeing with him not because he agrees with him but because now he thinks that whatever he's doing is not helping so putting distance between them will be what's best because Buck is getting what he needs somewhere else so he needs to minimize the damage to himself.

And the distance thing is something that stays until the end of the season, because during the first half of 6B, they are together the whole time, mixed feelings being obviously the biggest example, but they made a point of highlighting the fact that they were very close outside the firehouse, just to stop. They were chilling at Buck's loft, they were out and about scheming the fire captain, Buck looked more comfortable at Eddie's than he did in his own place. But then we don't even see them together in the hospital after the bridge. Like, there's s p a c e now.

And I spent a really long time trying to figure out what was going on with this scene that made such an impression on me, and it's that Buck doesn't sound like someone who believes in what they're saying, he sounds like someone who's justifying themselves and hoping they are doing the right thing. And Eddie doesn't really let him get away with this line of thought, not usually, but he does now, so they leave that conversation with different impressions of how it went. Buck thinks he's right and Eddie is just backing the fuck off.

And a while back it downed on me what other scene this made me think of. And that's the fountain scene in merry ex-mas.

They are even shot in a similar way, the off-center wide angle, the close-up from a side angle where you can see the other one slightly blurry, the focus of the conversation angled toward the front of the frame, everything happening in an outside location we will never probably see again, the way they are not looking at each other. And the conversation is similar too, I mean, sure they are not talking about dying but it is a big decision in Eddie's life that sounds like Eddie is justifying himself and needs Buck to agree with him. And Buck is agreeing with him, and not talking about it even though we KNOW he has opinions because he kept trying to talk about it with Chimney because Buck doesn't think it's his place to have an opinion and offer it to Eddie. Both scenes sound like they are talking and understanding each other but what the scene is showing us is that they are not.

And something about the way they are pretty much never looking at each other is that it is a way to show they are not seeing eye to eye in a situation, the most extreme example I can think of it is when Eddie drags Buck out of bed in Kids Today because they are pretty much never looking at each other there.

But to have them face the same direction is a really easy way to make you feel like something is wrong, especially if they are not moving, because if they are standing in the same spot for 3 minutes they could've turned to face each other, but they don't, because the message here is that they are not really seeing each other. And that in a conversation where Buck is talking about being seen by someone else????? Like, come on, that's so on purpose.

I also wanna add a take that's not mine, all credit to @anxieteandbiscuits for putting this particular thought in my head with this post, that's basically about how the "dating someone you rescued? that never ends well" line might also be another justification for why Eddie chooses to stay quiet. Because one thing is true, and that is that buddie do be rescuing each other. And it really sounds like something Eddie would do, to justify to himself not doing something that could make him lose Buck any way he could, because romantic relationships are very unstable, no matter how much you want it to work, how much you love each other, there's a very real level of unpredictability in a romantic relationship that doesn't exist in their friendship. So to imagine him going "the friendship is good, the friendship is what I need, I won't do anything to change that because I don't have to and it probably wouldn't end well with our track record anyway" makes a lot of sense too.

If you made it to here, I love you <3

I have more metas here if you feel like reading more of my brand of insanity.

#this is long #i went off wow sokaoskaoksaoks #anyway #911 #911 meta #thoughts thoughts thoughts #lets pray this makes me stop thinking about the cemetery scene #it wont but a girl can dream lol #at this point i should have a cemetery tag lol #buddie thoughts

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shannankle · 4 months

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Framing in DFF: Voyeurism and Sex

Okay I kept thinking about this conversation between @brifrischu and @lurkingshan over the last few days. They both make great points about how the show is using the sex scenes to convey conflict, themes, and genre expectations (or the subversion of these). Since I did a whole post thinking about visual framing and the camera's gaze, I wanted to compare how each of the sex scenes is drawing on different forms of voyeurism to convey ideas to the audience, and even draw us in and interrogate our reactions as viewers.

Before we jump into analyzing scenes, I wanted to establish a few levels of visual gaze/voyeurism.

The typical gaze of the camera. Here there's no obvious signals or framing of voyeurism apart from the natural voyeurism inherent in filming and watching any piece of visual media.

We know a character is being watched but we don't see the watcher doing this. Perhaps a character expresses feeling watched or thinks they saw something. At this level we may stay in the perspective of the character being watched or an outside perspective where the watcher remains off screen.

The gaze is mediated in a way that evokes watching. For example, through a camera, a window, or the first-person viewpoint of the killer (common in horror). The voyeurism becomes more obvious and experiential. We're implicated more explicitly in the gaze but not necessarily in a way that forces the audience to reflect on this fact.

We see someone else gazing in a mediated way. Hannah Bonner puts it best in a chapter she wrote about Cabin in the Woods and other films with surveillance: "The voyeur is no longer just the audience, squirming in their seats from Michael Meyers's point of view as he tracks down his naked sister and her boyfriend in Halloween...now the audience as voyeur watches the voyeurs watch the surveyed" (90). This gets meta on the viewer.

I'd argue that each sex scene manipulates these levels of voyeurism in ways that play with genre expectations, and in ways that play with and challenge our reactions as viewers to different kinds of sex.

Tee and White

The scene with Tee and White begins with us looking through the open door. We actually start with just Tee. White moves in from off screen and joins him as if the porch is a stage. So we start at a mild version of voyeurism level 3--our view is mediated in a way that evokes watching through the open door. It's not as obvious as other forms of mediation like windows (which we'll discuss later for Phi and Jin) but it's still getting us into that territory.

This quickly changes to more open shots on the porch. These are unmediated so we move into level 1 territory for a short bit as the two begin making out. That is until White sees a flash of Masky. There we enter level 2 as we see this from White's perspective. And of course, he then expresses the feeling of being watched explicitly.

The hand comes in to grope Tee, and I'd argue this lies between levels 1 and 2. We as the audience see the hand and certainly that implies a degree of being watched by whoever or whatever is getting handsy. But we neither see from their perspective nor see them watching per se.

In true slasher fashion however, we get the implication that the horny couple is being watched. In a straight 90s slasher, this would be the indication that at least one member of the promiscuous couple is about to die (and often they're the first to die in the film). The slasher film thus allows the watcher a titillating glimpse of sex or at the very least a woman undressing, while also punishing this promiscuity. It's quite common to have such scenes play out either from the killer's perspective (level 3) or at least with it implied they are watching (level 2).

So in a typical slasher, the fact that White feels watched and we see the hand would be the signal that one or both of these two will die soon after.

But as others have pointed out, this doesn't happen. We're pretty much told as much by the way the story skirts this genre convention narratively. But I'd also argue they subvert it visually.

When the two actually get down to the actual sex part, we cut to the two in the shower, largely blurred by the glass. Now, we could perhaps argue that this is a mediated gaze. But I'd argue that a) filming sex scenes in showers is so common that it doesn't necessarily feel like it evokes watching quite in that way and b) the gaze is intentionally limited and denied through blurring effects. Yes this is likely in part because Fuaiz was under 18 while filming. However, it also moves us into level 1 territory. This feels intentional in the way that it pushes back on the visual tropes of the slasher genre in a very deliberate way. It is not meant to be solely titillating, and it also drops any visual queues that might suggest they are being targeted, effectively detaching sex and sexuality from being inherently tied to death and the murderous gaze.

We get the threat but it is quickly dissipated. We get a similar move a few scenes later, where for Tee and White, outside voyeurism is explicitly denied. When the group is looking at the security footage they flip over to video of Tee and White on the porch. We move into a level 3 (we see the footage on the screen) and implied level 4 (the group watching said footage), but only for a fraction of a moment. Tee steps in to block the gaze of both the group and the audience. The threat of being viewed is once again blocked and diffused as me move back to level 1.

This denial and push back on higher levels of voyeurism stands in contrast to how Non and Keng are filmed. So on the one hand, Tee and White's scenes navigate and subvert the voyeuristic tropes of the slasher. On the other hand, they raise thematic concerns about surveillance. And not just surveillance but who gets surveilled and why.

Phi and Jin

Phi and Jin have had two sex scenes so it's interesting to compare them visually. In episode 1, we start off and remain primarily in level 1 voyeurism territory, with one exception. There is a moment as Jin is giving Phi head where we shift perspective. We move inside the house and view them for a few moments through a dew stained window. Like Tee and White there is some blurring happening, but much less pronounced. However, unlike the shower glass or the open door, the window much more clearly evokes watching, moving us into level 3 in the middle of Jin and Phi's first sexual scene.

In the second scene, we begin almost immediately at level 3 with a mediated gaze. It's unclear if this is a closet, wall fixture, or window, but we're viewing the scene through it as if we are hiding and watching. Throughout the scene we also get an unsteady almost shaky camera effect that fits this level. Of course, we then get the much more obvious moment where Phi pushes Jin against the window and we move to view them from outside. Finally we have the dog/astronaut doll who watches over the encounter. Since it's an inanimate object it doesn't actually move us into level 4 here but there is an allusion here to being watched at that level all the same.

All of this is clearly an intentional choice. As @lurkingshan points out Phi and Jin are filmed so explicitly in part to highlight their betrayal of Non. The scene clearly plays on Phi's emotional betrayal of Non and New (at least from their perspective) as that is what the episode is building to. But it also strongly dialogues with Jin's own guilt through it's framing. Jin who harmed Non through voyeurism has that gaze placed on himself.

It's interesting because this is the scene shot most consistently from level 3, what we would expect from a slasher scene. But it isn't the killer that is watching or hanging over them, but rather their own mixed up feelings of guilt. It's an interesting subversion of the role this level of voyeurism can play within horror. It feels particularly queer as well. Tee and White's sex which is narratively placed in the role of our first victims, is subverted and visually moves down to level 1. While the late in the game sex between Jin and Phi visually plays out like Tee and White's should have if this followed the slasher mold. Sexuality is decoupled from voyeuristic and narrative tropes that would link it to judgement and death. Instead it becomes a "window" into the characters' inner struggles and interpersonal dynamics.

While not as meta as Non and Keng's scene (which we'll get to soon), the framing here offers a subversion of the typical ways we tie sex into our judgements of morality and of other people/characters.

Non and Phi

Non and Phi's sexual moments are left to implication. We get no indication that anyone is watching them. Aside from the inherent voyeurism of the camera, their moments feel private, safely away from the world. They kiss in secluded places, squarely at level 1. The sex itself happens off screen, perhaps arguably even moving us into a level 0. If Tee and White's sex is framed in ways that push back on gazing, Non and Phi's sex is made entirely impossible to view in the first place.

Levels 1 and 0 feel right at home in BL. This isn't to say we don't get other levels in BLs but it's not exactly a primary mode or a consistent trope. The exception perhaps is the threat in some dramas of being outed: being walked in on or seen making out out or embracing. Depending on the story this ranges from a friend who ultimately accepts them to someone who reacts with rejection. In either case, in these stories voyeurism as a theme typically revolve around homophobia. However, here we're signaled from the get go that the show will be exploring other themes. Tee and White's brief exposure to the group isn't playing on the tension of the closet. So from a visual standpoint, the way voyeurism is played out for Tee and White (as the group sees their footage) also signals that the show isn't really playing in the BL sandbox, it's just borrowing some sand.

For Non and Phi, then, the private nature of their relationship, and the fact that it remains at level 0 and 1, isn't a reflection of them hiding their queerness per se. Rather it dialogues with the perceptions both the group and the audience have of Non up until this point. The assumption that he is an outcast through and through, that he is unloved, that they/we already see his full complexity.

Non and Keng

This privacy given to Non and Phi is contrasted strongly with how Non and Keng are framed. By juxtaposing the two pairs, I believe that the show is challenging certain assumptions and dialogues around sex.

As Non and Keng begin to kiss and touch we stay in level 1 territory initially. However, this changes sharply when Jin and Fluke come to look for them. When we see the sex it is not through a neutral camera but through Jin's first person perspective. The shot is cut as if looking through a cracked door. We enter level 3 voyeurism. Quickly, as Jin pulls out his phone, we move from level 3 to level 4. We are now not just experiencing Jin watching, but we've become voyeurs to Jin's voyeurism. He watches and films, and we watch him do so.

The show clearly has a lot to say about what it means to surveil others and about the ways our perceptions can do others harm. It's very intentional that Non and Keng's sex is framed this way. As @lurkingshan points out, the scene is intentionally graphic to hit home on the fact that this is SA. In line with this, the visual framing takes us to the highest level of voyeurism (level 4) to make this violation clear. This doesn't just stress how awful this is, but also ask us as viewers to be reflective on our own judgements and perception.

As @brifrischu points out, Non and Keng's sex is transactional and easily judged as cheating, slutty, and scandalous on Non's part rather than SA. This contrasts with the level 0 and 1 of Phi and Non, who are judged as sweet, safe, and monogamous in contrast. By pulling us into level 4, the show is getting meta, and asking us to reflect on these assumptions. It wants to draw these comparisons in a way that makes us stand back and think about our role as viewers and voyeurs. As an audience we are implicated in the dichotomy that's drawn. There's an awareness here of audience response (or at least one unfortunately common one) and a critique of it built into the visual levels being played with. This is of course highlighted further in the following episode where Non reads social media commentary about the leaked video.

By making us voyeurs of this voyeurism, we're made complicit in a deeply uncomfortable but intentional way as we're asked to reflect on our perspectives around sex and morality. In doing this the show is highlighting the harm we can do just as it highlights the harm the characters do to one another.

#hopefully this makes as much sense on paper as it does in my head #dff the series #dead friend forever #dff meta #dead friend forever meta #my posts #my meta #dff the series meta

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utilitycaster · 3 months

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In the end, it is misogyny but in the form of that Imogen (and most of the female cast, if we are being fair) gets reduced to just being a woman to the point that criticizing any real flaw, wrong doing, or "hey i personally maybe perhaps don't like that she did this" is turned into an attack on her because she is a woman, because after all, all women are perfect and so so dainty they must be protected (sarcasm)

Without mentioning the attacking real women in the name of the fictional one

It really is the "God forbid a woman do anything" but in it's worst form

Sorry for venting, been having thoughts about the fandom for the past 5 years

YUP. I do recommend Unlikeable Female Characters by Anna Bogutskaya which I devoured in like, one sitting over my winter break and posted a bunch of excerpts from but this discourse is extremely not limited to the CR fandom. I mean, think about all of the endlessly churning nonsense about the women of Gone Girl and Midsommar. I am going to see Love Lies Bleeding tomorrow and have steered well clear of really any discussion because I simply would like to see buff lesbians in a crime drama but apparently the discourse is rancid.

Of course there are people who assume ill of female characters while excusing men. That is absolutely a big problem. But again, we can barely talk about that. I recently made a post about how Laura is not a particularly chaotic player, and indeed is one of the most cautious players in actual play, and again I think there is a serious and important conversation to be had about how there's probably a reason why, say, Travis and Taliesin are more likely to make extremely bold moves, because they didn't get raked over the coals during C1 for stealing a cool broom from a guest character! I actually think Marisha has managed to hang on to some of her boldness and it makes her a stronger player but I would not have been surprised if she retreated after the hate she got from Keyleth. But yeah, in actual play, bold moves are pretty important. We can't even talk about how real-world misogyny holds back the actual actors without some moronic wretch being like "FIGURES THAT A MISOGYNIST CUNT LIKE YOU LIKES A MALE ACTOR."

When a character who is a man - or in some cases, characters who are not men but are played by men - does something people don't like we can say "wow, I didn't like this, but it was an interesting choice by the actor!" but we aren't allowed to either talk about the reasons why a real world woman might hesitate to play a character who does ugly things - because of the misogynistic backlash that will land specifically on her as a real person - nor can we compliment her for going for it and playing a complex flawed character, because how DARE you say a woman is anything less than some kind of Divine Feminine ideal. At best you're allowed a two-dimensional caricature of She's So Sweet And Good But Sometimes Gets Angry (this also happened to my friend Keyleth).

And this might reveal my own biases but like. I as a woman don't love being called self-centered, but that, personally, would probably lead me to some reflection. If you call me a girlfailure, even jokingly, I am going to break your nose. It's really telling that like...one of the absolute no-brainer "hey stop calling grown women girls" feminist tenets has gone by the wayside particularly with the set of people who think that meta that fails to put women on so high a pedestal they are untouchable is misogynist. They are awful towards women, fictional and real.

A line that always stuck with me from, bizarrely, a book about wordplay, was that Victorian men would treat women of their same classes as their superiors, but never their equals - they would coddle them and protect them but they wouldn't actually engage with their thoughts and foibles. (This happened to my friend Jester).

Anyway my personal solution is to keep going. On some level, as my previous post indicates, while I don't want the harassment it also only underscores my point, that a lot of these people are way more invested in being a dick to women on the internet than writing meta about the pretend women they think they like. I have to imagine they're doing this because either think they're entitled to meta they like from people who can actually fucking write it because god knows most of the people making this complaint have the most "if you can't dazzle them with brillance, blind them with the most purple-prose bullshit you can muster" attitude; or because they literally are just champing at the bit to attack women online with the ostensible veneer of "but it's FEMINIST to call THESE women cunts because they said my blorbo wasn't saintly and flawless." However, again, I know that I'm pretty bullheaded and forcibly unlearned the uh, patriarchal idea that women should not be confrontational. I do not blame people who look at this whole situation and say "I'm going to keep my thoughts to myself because this is so unpleasant."

#answered #Anonymous #i got a ghost message too that i only assume is for the same reason as my previous anon #and like. ngl. i'm THIS close to naming suspected names. like i have tried to keep quiet but *rashinna voice* can we take out the trash #i'd love to see more meta about imogen but again i don't blame the people who are like nope not worth it.#cr tag

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raayllum · 7 months

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Your Aunt's Spirit In You :: Callum & Amaya, a Meta

Was thinking about these two due to writing a scene between them in a recent oneshot, and then about the similarities they have, so thought - why not? Especially for a shorter meta than more of the long form ones I have siting in my drafts, let's talk about Callum and Amaya

As always, SIMILARITIES first:

Both loyal siblings to a monarch (Sarai through marriage, Ezran through birth)

Taken captive and interrogated by elves

Willing to sacrifice themselves for the good of the group (special shout out to 3x01 which puts this back to back * )

* This is slightly negated by Rayla, not Callum, being the one to actually risk her life (as she talks Callum out of risking his own quite easily) whereas Amaya goes through with it. Still, Callum's sentiment and willingness is there (and on multiple occasions), so it's included. ("I need you to kill me" being another example)

Skeptical, distrustful, and good at reading people (even if Callum changes his mind about Rayla and Amaya does not about Viren)

Good planners / generals (see my General Callum tag here)

Often times more decisive than their partner (Rayla often hesitates, which Janai worries about as well) and encouraging them to prioritize their own needs as well above just their 'duty'

In 4x01, they are both worried about secrets (as a result of war based trauma) and potential attacks, even though both 'secrets' wind up being something positive and wonderful (successfully for Amaya - as she is proposed to and happily rejoices with her partner - and an attempt for Callum, as it leaves him forlorn because his partner is still missing)

Slightly darker sense of humour, maybe ("Now that you'll officially be my little brother, I'll try not to beat you up too much" + "Besides, she only eats three people a day. It's a small price to pay for peace")

And last but not least, there is Janai's assessment of their similarities (aka the meta title) that accompanies the soundtrack piece of "Like Aunt, Like Nephew".

Callum does often undertake dangerous quests / make dangerous choices (travelling across the world to return a dragon egg, throwing himself off a mountain, running into what he believes to be a trap, etc). This is, however, much like how Aaravos' assessment of Callum in 4x04 ("and my favourite, the human mage, already tainted by darkness, and destined to play right into my hands") is true for all of his mage pawns up to that point (Ziard, Claudia, and Viren in the past), true of just about every character in the show. Which makes sense - in an action/adventure fantasy show, most of the characters are going to have to be okay about throwing themselves into danger just by proxy of genre. In most of the trio scenes where someone is hurling themselves into danger, it is usually Rayla first - and then Callum, stepping up if/when she can't do something on her own.

As you might've noticed while there are similarities, outside of their skepticism and willingness to sacrifice (which is again, something most characters in the show have) there aren't that many that go beyond more surface level "these events both happen to these characters," as Amaya and Callum's mindsets aren't that similar, which are the bulk of the main differences we're going to talk about next.

DIFFERENCES:

Prejudice (or therefore lack of)

Amaya is very prejudiced against elves ("Moonshadow elves - the worst kind [...] Don't worry, Callum, I've slain monsters before") at the beginning of the show, whereas Callum never is. He still holds some poor misconceptions (mostly the blood drinking) but he still always sees them as 1) people and 2) therefore worth reasoning with: "Can't you just make peace with them? You don't want to die, I'm sure the elves and dragons don't want to die, so everyone agrees"and his first conversation(s) with Rayla.

2. The ways in which Amaya is similar to Viren are largely different than the ways Callum is similar to Viren.

Amaya devoted her life to safeguarding the Breach and their kingdom's borders, a form of security that Viren was worried about and continued to be worried about once he came into power. Amaya and Viren can both be a little two-faced, willing to present a trusting front and hide their ulterior motives (most notably from each other, and something Rayla has in common arguably with both of them), whereas Callum is incredibly honest most of the time and is very bad at covering up his emotions (something he also has in common with Rayla, since although she often tries to cover things up, she routinely fails at it).

Viren is willing to send his children after the princes in spite of the danger of their secret missions ("if you must choose, choose the egg") and Amaya is willing to hold the Breach rather than go after her nephews, leaving Corvus to do so in her stead. This is very different than Callum, who automatically and often times insists on going along with his loved ones (Ezran, Rayla) when they're embarking on dangerous journeys of their own.

On that note, Amaya and Viren are both also taken captive by the Sunfire elves and given the Trial of Light, with very different outcomes that S5 also reaffirms for Callum, so let's talk about it:

3. The Light Will Decide Your Fate

During Janai's interrogation of Amaya, and Finnegrin's interrogation of Callum, the two respond very differently. Both Janai and Finnegrin want information, but Janai doesn't resort to torture even when Amaya remains entirely silent on any and all matters, and Finnegrin keeps pushing at Callum (and Callum keeps giving up information) even if he doesn't give up what Finnegrin wants, at first.

Amaya's trial is specifically about whether or not she's "pure of heart" or, more accurately, whether or not she's done dark magic. Her interrogation and test, if you will, ends with her passing it - to Khessa's surprise. Amaya is not a mage, and certainly not a dark mage, and is therefore going to interact and approach the world differently than a mage - human or elven or otherwise - would. Callum's interrogation and test is also about dark magic, and he does not 'pass it', lmao.

Because where Amaya had to confront the Light, Callum had to confront his Dark.

This is where we get into more of the mindset differences.

Amaya is willing to cut her losses (if she cannot successfully defend the Breach, she will destroy it, circa 3x01) but Callum almost never does (staying too late in the Great Bookery, for example; holding onto hope that Harrow might be alive even when he knows deep down he knows better, etc). Amaya refuses to give up the Sun Seed for her partner's life, knowing it safeguards a bright future and is what Janai would want her to do; Callum does give Finnegrin the spell and does dark magic to save Rayla, even when she wouldn't ultimately want him to do either of those things on her behalf. 5x08 makes this comparison particularly clear by juxtaposing these two deals and scenes throughout the episode.

Part of this is because, as Amaya acknowledges, for a great deal of her life, she and Callum had very different ideas regarding strength - which is exactly what allows these perspectives to switch:

When she died, I felt lost and weak without her. I hated feeling that way, so I learned to be strong alone. Stoic, strong... and lonely.

But the last two years have changed everything. Meeting Janai, falling in love, I am stronger than I ever was... because we are stronger together. And I realized that was the real truth of me and Sarai, too.

Callum has, up until about halfway through 5x08, always believed that he (and others) are ultimately stronger together, and we see this reflected through the first four seasons and into season five. However, the back half of 5x08 begins to greatly challenge this. Meanwhile, this is something that both Amaya and to a more detailed degree, Rayla, have had to learn. Because, when it comes to how they've responded to trauma, Amaya and Rayla are more similar to one another (and arguably to Viren in this way) than Amaya is to Callum, who by and large has a very different trauma response.

CONCLUSION (??)

While Amaya and Callum do have some similarities, Amaya is not extraordinarily similar to either of her nephews - Callum included - due to their differences in occupation, mindset, and trauma response. The similarities they do share are mostly things that they each share with Viren (such as skepticism) or share with most of the general cast (intelligence - although Callum is a standout - and bravery, for example). Most of their parallels, therefore, are put there to provide contrasts within similar themes (mostly in S1, 4x01, and 5x08), and they do not parallel more than any particular pair of characters in the show (seriously, you could throw a dart and probably find parallels between almost anyone, the show is so steeped in them, so looking at consistency and structure is key). Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed.

—Dragons out

#tdp amaya #tdp callum #tdp meta #the dragon prince #tdp #analysis series #amaya #punching someone in the face is not a thematic parallel in this show i'm sorry to report #however these two do have their similarities & differences #analysis #arc 1 #arc 2 #multi

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completeoveranalysis · 4 months

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[4]

AND NOW WE GET PIFFLE CALL BACKS?

Oh Clamp really do love me. This is unreasonably perfect.

Who else begins the climactic fight of the series with, “Hey, remember this double layered question I posed 135 chapters ago? Let’s revisit that now!”

WHICH IS VERY GENEROUS OF THEM in the way that it signposts an exact conversation for us to think about and realise (without having to reread the whole series yet again) that the whole conversation between Syaoran and Fai in Piffle was REALLY HEAVILY honed in on the secret Lava Lamp crushing guilt and backstory we didn’t know about until now.

Which is wild in the meta sense knowing that CLAMP planned for that exact sentiment to be the very core of a character we wouldn’t even understand for another 130 chapters, but also on the character level knowing (in hindsight) that Lava Lamp himself was hearing this conversation happen in real time and probably had an absolutely horrible time knowing that they were discussing ethics behind the soul-crushing decision he made that broke the universe and is still suffering AND seeing the consequences of.

But how absolutely fascinating that after Shara our cloned Syaoran ended up developing such a similar insecurity about messing with timelines and the consequences of doing so completely independently from Lava Lamp. The parallel lives of these parallel people. The hitsuzen of it all.

AND! Fai gives almost the same advice!

Last time he said, “You can ponder over that all you want[…] but right now, it won’t do us a bit of good,” and, “If there’s something that you can accomplish if you try, then the thing to do is try. ‘Changing history’ is an idea on too grand a scale for a person to do anything about. It’s also important to accept that there are things you just can’t do.” And he was talking specifically between the Shura/Shara timeline changes at the time, but in relation to Clow? Lava Lamp holds himself accountable for every single thing that happened, but he didn’t do all of that. He was just trying to achieve a goal - which is framed here as a good thing (and is very good advice for dealing with anxiety besides).

At his core Fai sees this same struggle playing out in each Syaoran and gave them both the same tips - but this time he can reference the previous time and really hammer it home.

And, deliciously, it echoes even stronger here. The advice is to ignore all the things you can’t control. Just focus on what you want, and do what you can to achieve it.

Lava Lamp might still feel that he ruined the universe, but that won’t help him right now. Like Fai said last time, that’s on too grand a scale for him to ever take on his own. He has one thing he wants to achieve and he should focus on that. The timeline will sort itself out later.

Which is SUCH a solid Dad moment. Kurogane gets to tell Evil Wolverine to fuck off, Fai and Kurogane get to flirt and insult Evil Wolverine to his face, and now Fai gets to give a touching character moment to Lava Lamp as they all share the final story beat together. It ties the Syaoran experience together (ironically, since the other Syaoran he WAS speaking to is RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM but may or may not have the soul to remember the moment at all), and ties both sides of the plot together into this one big family moment.

Though I’m slightly suspicious of Fai last time mentioning that It’s also important to accept that there are things you just can’t do.

#Because THEMATICALLY #It would be SUCH a GOOD character arc for Lava Lamp #If he had to accept Sakura was gone and has been dead this whole time #And that he never really had the power to save her #And that it was never his fault #But EMOTIONALLY? Watching that would be DEVASTATING.#Liveblogging the reservoir chronicle #Tsubasa #Vol 206 #Fai #Lava Lamp Guy #Syaoran #The metaphor of the Sakura frozen in time #Like a regret he was told he had the power to fix #But Evil Wolverine was on the other side of the smoking gun from the start #It was never about Lava Lamp #It wasn’t even really about Sakura #It was just Evil Wolverine from start to finish

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kazisgirlfriend · 7 months

Text

Like Aunt, Like Nephew

I happened across @raayllum's meta here about Callum and Amaya, and certainly raises a few really interesting points about them that I wanted to touch on. Most notably, it demonstrates how their overall differences really stem from a simple difference in overall experience - at the end of the day, Amaya has potentially years if not decades of experience on a teenager Callum. So, when there are similarities between Callum and Amaya, they are as frequently about who Amaya WAS as much as who Amaya IS.

However, differences in experience do not negate parallels between characters. Just as Runaan is far more experienced than Rayla, that fact alone does not diminish the very clear parallels she has with her father figure. Similarly, the differences between Callum and Amaya do ultimately come down to a level of experience.

Prejudice

Callum and Amya's contrast in prejudice actually demonstrate how their level of experience influence their differences. Amaya had spent years at the breach, which solidified distrust and even hatred that she had towards elves ("I've slain monsters before").

Callum's prejudice, while relatively muted, is still there. Not only does he assume Rayla drinks blood, he initially refers to as a "creature" in the novelization, and later amends to thinking she's "one of the good ones."

As a sidenote, it's important not to dismiss Callum's prejudices as mere "misconceptions" simply because they are less intense. TDP is ultimately a story about overcoming prejudice, which is something that Callum does quicker than Amaya does. But this is ultimately the result of his prejudices being borne out of a lack of exposure rather than years of war like Amaya. Amaya has had years to let her prejudices fester, while Callum's simple ignorance gets dispelled rather quickly. But both Callum and Amaya demonstrate admirable open-mindedness in overcoming personal biases, even if at different paces.

The Test of Light

The other comparison is between how Amaya handles her test of light in 3x02 vs. how Callum handles his "test" in 5x08. This, I admit, was a peculiar test since whatever situation Callum was faced with in s5, it had nothing to do with purity. It was not a test of light.

Instead, Callum faced his test of light in s3, when he rode the Twin-Tailed Inferno-Tooth Tiger.

A creature that can sense the purity of one's heart (much like Pharos' staff), and a creature that Callum rode.

Instead the test that Callum faced in 5x08 was a test of darkness. Facing down his own dark side, and ultimately emerging triumphant, signified by the narrative rewarding Callum with the Ocean Arcanum.

Framing Callum's test as a defeat stems from a simplistic view of light and darkness as mutually exclusive. In truth, light and darkness exist in all of us, even heroes. Callum's realization that he contains complexities beyond his understanding is integral to his arc, not a failure. Everyone has a dark side, and it is this realization, that Callum has a part of himself he can neither fully understand nor control, that leads Callum to reach a breakthrough with the Ocean Arcanum. His eventual triumph would not be framed as such if he did not face this shadow side.

But as this lesson is one that is wholly irrelevant to s3, it raises the question as to why should we compare these two moments across two seasons at all. And the reason is that, if we were to compare the actual parallels this season, find that Callum and Amaya--as they both charge in to save their loved ones--are not so different at all.

In the end, their nuanced journeys demonstrate how light and darkness can coexist within us all. Comparing dissimilar tests obscures this meaningful complexity that makes both characters human. The distinction lies in understanding, not judgment.

Stronger Together

While Amaya's lesson to Rayla about being stronger together vs. alone is important, the reason this conversation never comes up between Amaya and Callum is because Callum already knows this. It is yet another similarity that he has with his aunt.

Even after the tribulations of 5x08, Callum is still the one to insist that the trio does everything together. Akiyu gave the group only one amulet, meaning that only Callum can theoretically go underwater after the pearl. In spite of this, Callum takes it upon himself to reverse-engineer the amulet to create magical gills for all of them. Far from insisting he should be strong alone, Callum acknowledges--much like Amaya did--that they are stronger together.

The writers convey Callum already comprehending Amaya's lesson through his own actions, rather than needing the moral spelled out for him. It's a great example of showing rather than telling. This creative choice highlights the strong unspoken bond and understanding between aunt and nephew.

The Canon of It All

Challenging the notion that Callum and Amaya are especially similar is a peculiar undertaking, given that the show spends a large amount of time highlighting their similarities.

I could show all the similarities between Callum and Amaya throughout the series, but rather than dragging out the meta any further, all I and anyone else have to do is merely point to the fact that their similarities are called out by the show itself. If the narrative is indicating its significance, then it's significant. Rather than denying the undeniable, it is more constructive to examine why this relationship is highlighted and what significance it may hold for future story developments.

After all, the writers make a concerted effort to draw connections between Callum and Amaya across multiple scenes and story arcs. Questioning why such focused narrative choices exist will likely offer more meaningful insights into their characters and bond. Challenging textual evidence risks missing the forest for the trees. If the show itself calls attention to a theme, then clearly it carries weight. The deeper question is what purpose these parallels serve in the broader storytelling. Their interconnected journeys likely foreshadow an integral joint role to come.

Conclusion - What does this all mean?

It's very rare for one to write a meta around the argument that the story beats and similarities audiences are noticing are actually not important, especially when the show itself expressly calls out these similarities and story beats in such a prolific way. So that really raises the question - what is this all about? What is the motivation behind the argument that fans are wrong for noticing the things the show explicitly draws attention to?

At the end of the day, what motivates disagreements about whether Callum is like Amaya isn't about objective scoreboard-tallying. After all, Callum's s5 parallels with Viren are only held together by one single utterance of "I'd do anything for X" from each of them in very different contexts and that hasn't deterred many folks.

Instead, it is an issue of bias. As I mentioned before, there is a certain stereotype about characters with nerdy interests, and Callum has been no exception. He's a human mage, and so it's frequently assumed that the only "proper" comparisons he can have are with other human mages like Claudia and Viren (which also leads to his depictions as morally dubious, since the only other human mages we've seen are morally dubious ones).

He also starts out the series as "bad at everything" and a bit clumsy. Rather than realizing he's simply insecure and inexperienced, the argument goes that actually his ineptitude is innate to his character. He's scrawny, weak, a pushover, someone who belongs on the sidelines and with his nose in his sketchbook. Unlike the strong, brave, tough, capable warriors like Sarai, Amaya, Soren, Rayla, and so on.

But when seasons 4 and 5 rolled out, when it was revealed that Callum was far from a pushover--that he is strong, talented, confident, tough, and brave--along with the explicit comparisons between him and Amaya, most fans I think realized and recognized who Callum really is now. But a few instead doubled-down, and saw the parallels between Callum and Amaya (which, again--cannot stress this enough--are called out by the show directly) as a threat to this initial takeaway back in s1.

Assumptions about "proper" character archetypes or stereotypes around nerdy, awkward characters can cause some to overlook Callum's growth. But his strengths as a mage do not preclude similarities to a warrior like Amaya. Wells-rounded characters defy singular boxes.

But that's neither here nor there. The most pertinent question here is not whether, but why the show so explicitly calls out Callum's similarities with Amaya. My guess is that it has something to do with seasons 6 and 7, about the kind of person Callum will become. That it has something to do with why Callum, despite Aaravos' insistence, is not destined to play right into his hands.

But that is a story for another time ;)

Postscript - Viren and Amaya

As a sidenote, there was some stuff about the ways Viren and Amaya were similar that I found interesting. Haven't forgotten about that, and wanted to address it, but I'll do that separately as I don't want to drag out this meta beyond what's reasonable.

#callum #amaya #like aunt like nephew #rayla #ezran #soren #sarai #viren #rayllum #amaya sympathizing with rayla is not a parallel im sorry to report #the dragon prince #tdp

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class1akids · 10 months

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What do you think about the relationship between All might and Shouto? I would have thought they would have quite the complicated and interesting one. All might being the reason he was born and hurt inadvertently while being Shouto’s idol and All might learning of Shouto’s traumatizing childhood by someone who he thought he could have called a comrade or at least a fellow hero.

I really love how their relationship grew in the course of the story and how it came together in the end in a truly beautiful moment.

I wrote a meta long ago about Shouto's arc and how it fits in with All Might's legacy, and another one about their relationship up to the remedial arc - and I think what I said in these is still very much relevant and the story did end up going into the direction I've expected.

So I will not repeat what I've said in those, but focus more on the events post-remedial arc.

While Shouto's turbulent relationship to Endeavor and learing to see his father for who he really is - hero and flawed human being - is a huge part of his arc, All Might is there as a constant, a touchstone, the ideal Shouto never again wants to lose sight of: a reassuring hero.

For Shouto this picture of All Might is very personal - it's not about his rank, or Symbol on a societal level, but a comforting presence that child Shouto can hang onto. Someone who instinctively makes him feel that things can be ok, that he can be in control of his destiny and decide who he wants to be for himself.

He strives to be this kind of person - someone who makes others feel at ease just by being there - and this gives him the drive to improve - something he was lacking before.

Then the Dabi reveal happens, and Shouto is suddenly mixed up with the public reveal of all the dirty laundry of the Todoroki family, exposed to all of Japan as a genetic experiment of his madman father, who created him out of jelousy and grudge of the nations beloved All Might.

Shouto suddenly loses all the progress he made - his reputation is in the mud, people see him as "Endeavor's son, Dabi's brother", view him with concern and judge him based on his family, not his own merits. Despite all his personal growth, and mastery over his quirk, he's as far as he can be from his goal of being seen as "Shouto" - his own person, a reassuring hero following in All Might's steps.

On the other side, we have All Might. He originally saw Shouto merely as another talented student, a son of a colleague, a rival to his own protege. But during the Remedial arc, he visibly got closer both to Bakugou and Shouto on a personal level and I'll never get over the fact that it was All Might who was with the both of them when they got their hero licenses and had their public debut as heroes.

All Might also does have an inkling about Endeavor's motives of "creating Shouto" after the Sport Festival and their Remedial talk, but both times he decides to stay out of the family matter and of what he sees as a "discord" between father and son.

So when Dabi publicly exposes Endeavor's jealousy, the abuse in the family and just how deep the rabbit hole is and how All Might is connected to it (even if obviously he had no idea), I was really curious how he'll handle it.

I feel like he didn't know what to say - to Shouto (like a sorry would feel empty and also none of it is All Might's fault) or to Endeavor (who was already changing and feeling ashamed and guilty about everything) so he just kind of said nothing.

But then the final clash happens and the hero's plan goes to shit, and Dabi is on his way to blow Gunga up and AFO is on his way to Deku - and suddenly there is a choice to make. And this is the point where All Might chooses something he has never done before - he chooses to meddle with the Todoroki family.

He calls Shouto and Iida to convince them to go to Gunga instead of trying to intercept AFO. And his conversation with Shouto is so heartfelt and warm. Reassuring. He says nothing about the family history - he talks to Shouto about his heart, validating all the pain and emotional trouble he carried and gives him a way to be who he wants to be. To save his family AND the civilians. To be the hero to reassure people and diffuse the threat.

I think this is All Might's gift to Shouto in a way - his attempt to set things right for him, even if he had no responsibility in the way the Todoroki family turned out. Because without All Might, I have no doubt in my mind that Shouto would have chosen to confront AFO - prioritize the more important threat, like a hero would over his own family mess (of course, he had no knowledge of the explosion brewing in Gunga).

And I also think that All Might even knew that Endeavor likely would try his murder - suicide plan and kill himself and Touya in order to save everyone (of course, even All Might couldn't have counted on Rei intervening). But All Might doesn't want Shouto to have to live with that choice of not trying everything in his power to save his father and brother.

All Might is right in that if Shouto and Iida don't go, there is no version of Gunga where nobody dies. So he gives Shouto a chance of a "perfect save" with no losses. To be a hero that Endeavor never was: someone who can reconcile saving both his family and everyone else.

So I love the way that All Might who was Shouto's childhood hope and insipiration of being able to rise above his own dark origin, in the end was just that. He didn't swoop in to save Shouto - he helped him giving him reassurance, validaton, encouragement, and a path to achieve his goal.

So their arc together came to a really nice full circle - All Might just being this warm, comforting presence in Shouto's arc of healing and finding his way as his own person. Their relationship was an exploration of another facet of being a hero that's beyond beating up the bad guys and saving people. A bit less tangible than "win and save", but if you look at what divides All Might and Endeavor (beyond just power gap), it becomes clear that this ability to put people at ease and inspire and reassure them is also a core feature of a true hero.

And I love how also for All Might it shows growth. He goes from staying out of the business of the Todoroki family to living up to his own words about meddling being the true sign of a hero.

It's this idea that ties together All Might, Deku, Iida and Shouto, from the Sport Festival to Stain to Kamino to the Deku retrieval and in the endgame then bringing tying it all together in a neat bow makes this theme one of the best and most consistently written ones in the story in my opinion.

#c1a asks #bnha meta #todoroki shouto #all might #toshinori yagi #todoroki endgame #iida tenya

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sockpuppethistorian · 1 month

Text

Sex and the City, S1E1 Review from the PoV of an AroAce

Welcome to the show! I've done it. I watched Sex and the City's pilot episode, and I have put my thoughts below. ENJOY.

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Okay, so it’s starting with this little vignette about… a woman coming to New York from London and immediately meeting a guy to hook up with and getting very invested while they date for (checks notes)(this is a very meta phrase since these are my notes right now) TWO WEEKS. Why do people go on vacation and just decide that they have to hook up with people? When I go on vacation I want to see the sights and do fun things! It seems exhausting to not even be able to take a break from trying to find The One.

Oh, she MOVED from London to New York.

My point still stands.

So for 2 weeks they were having sex and doing all these romantic dates and planned to MEET PARENTS? I just. This English woman hasn’t even joined a gym or met the neighbors yet.

Alright. Now Carrie is talking and using the phrases “The End of Love in Manhattan” and “The Age of Un-Innocence” to describe New York City and the romance scene in the 90s. Okay, besides being dramatic, these are both hilarious. Clearly it’s not the end of love in Manhattan if this entire show is obsessing about love. But age of un-innocence? Yeah I’ll buy that.

This show being about a sex column is so funny. Because like, being aroace obviously sex makes no sense to me. But clearly it also doesn’t make sense to allos. And that’s beautiful.

Now Voiceover Carrie is explaining how love works and random people around New York are complaining about how essentially their entire lives revolve around dating and how everyone’s standards are too high. Let these people rock climb and eat their salads in peace without involving romance, I tell ya!

We’ve moved to the 4 friends (Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, Miranda) having a birthday dinner for one of them, and they’re just complaining the whole time about all being single). These people are putting way too much emphasis on needing relationships and men. I have such a hard time understanding why they can’t just live their lives and wait to see when a partner comes more naturally as opposed to obsessing over it like this. Maybe I’m not giving them credit, though, because this level of obsession is like me constantly needing good shows to watch on Netflix. Like, calm down and eat your birthday cake and have fun.

The extremely random drag queens that present the birthday cake is a… confusing touch.

They seem to feel so much embarrassment that they're four women in their 30s who aren’t married. Literally my dream would be an entire friend group of unmarried and uninterested-in-marriage people.

Now I’m confused. Do these people just want sex or do they want relationships and marriage? Even in this conversation between the four of them I’m so confused. They don’t want to be single, but they’re like “boo hoo the sex great but then he wanted to read me his poetry.” ????

Carrie is now having lunch with her friend, and he spots “the loathe of your life.” Real. (This was a description that Carrie’s canonical “gay best friend” used to point out someone she used to hook up with— or are Carrie refers to him, “A mistake I made when I was 26. And 29. And 31.”)

So, this is not a judgment on anybody, especially not real people, but I feel so confused and perplexed by the way logic and rationale goes out the door when it comes to people that one is sexually attracted to. Not that it doesn’t happen in other settings but it just seems like a very scary thing to me. Carrie has decided for some reason that to get back at him for the three times she had sex with him and it didn’t turn into a relationship, she is going to make it a fourth time and also not make it a relationship that way this time she’s the one in charge of… whatever the 90s version of ghosting would be??? I just don’t get it.

And I’m sorry, they scheduled a 3 o’clock sex date?? Why?? I could not possibly be bothered. Carrie and her Mistake simply must have something better to do at 3 o’clock, like getting a snack from a vending machine. Or taking a stroll.

Carrie is now having sex with this man, to prove that women can have sex just to have sex without feelings. And does to this guy what he did to her all the other times before that by leaving without any emotional intimacy. Why????

“I left feeling powerful, potent, and incredibly alive.” (Carrie after she abruptly leaves after having sex at 3pm on a workday) Why?? Like I KNOW that I lack the understanding of this because of the asexuality and whatnot but truly what feels good about that?!?!?

Oh my gosh. Guys. I am meeting the famous Mr. Big. And he’s…

Not… attractive…?????

Also who bumps into someone and immediately starts listing off that they notice that they don’t have a ring and that they’re attractive?? And that for some reason Carrie had an entire pack of condoms loose enough to all spill out when this man very lightly bumped into her. I can’t this feels like if humans were not humans with sex drives but just sex drives that were a little bit human.

I did not expect to have this many thoughts at THIRTEEN MINUTES INTO THE EPISODE.

Carrie is now meeting with her friend who looks like he works in IT in 2024, and said he has to tell her a “shocking secret.” Who wants to guess it’s related to sex?

… … … Guys the shocking secret was that he hasn’t had sex in a year. (Carrie’s response: “I don’t understand that, you’re such a nice guy.”) (Skipper’s response back: “I’m too nice. I’m a romantic. I just have so much feeling.”)

I… I’m actually impressed they’re finding this many different ways to talk about the exact same thing. Is this how allo conversations go??

Skipper says he’s sensitive because he doesn’t objectify women.

Skipper: Most guys, when they meet a girl, the first thing that they see is… you know… Carrie: (confidently as if she is proving some sort of weird point) P*ssy? Skipper: (chuckling like a school girl) Oh God! Hehehehe I hate that word. (Pause for a beat) Don’t you have any friends that you can hook me up with?

?? Y’all, can you name one time the first thing a boy sees in a girl is her genitals, unless he has accidentally logged into PornHub and forgotten that’s what he’s watching and thinks it’s Every Woman He Knows?

And then… HM. Man, this guy moves fast. Embarrassed by the word p*ssy and immediately turns around asking for a hook up. ???

So for some context, the immediate next thing that happens after this guy (SKIPPER) says he hasn’t had sex in a year and then is embarrassed by the word p*ssy, is to tell Carrie that he likes older women (literally this is what he says), and then Carrie decides to set him up with her friend Miranda.

Skipper after she says she’ll set him up with Miranda: “Don’t tell her I’m nice.”

Okay, so the goal here is really just unemotional sex.

WHAT. The. HEEECK.

Voiceover Carrie: “Miranda was gonna hate Skipper. She’d think he was mocking her with his sweet nature and decided he was an a**hole.”

?? Why waste everyone’s time?? Like is the point here for Carrie to get no one any sex or relationships? Like maybe it’s the End of Love in Manhattan because you’re setting up two people on a date that you know will fizzle out.

So now she’s on the phone with her friend Charlotte who has a date with someone that Voiceover Carrie describes as an “un-gettable bachelor.” What does it mean to be an “un-gettable bachelor”? Does this mean he has sex but doesn’t date? Does this mean he dates but won’t have sex? Does this mean he doesn’t usually do any second dates? I can’t even tell what these people want.

Carrie said she had an “afternoon of cheap and easy sex.” I want to psychologically explore this with her. Like did she just like the manipulation part? Did she just need to have an orgasm? What is going on here.

Okee doke, so now they’re in a club, where Carrie says it’s like the bar Cheers where everyone knows your name, except “here they forget it five minutes later.” I can’t tell if this is supposed to entice me or show how sinful everyone is being.

And we have Carrie’s friend Miranda, being very mean to Skipper who in the last scene was annoying me but now I feel bad for him because Miranda is literally interrogating him and trying to prove he’s a pig.

Voiceover Carrie says “I was about to rescue Skipper from an increasingly hopeless situation, when suddenly—“ stop right there, Voiceover Carrie. YOU PUT HIM IN THIS SITUATION. She is playing games. My opinion as of right now is her sex column was too boring so she is stirring the pot, which doesn’t seem to be too difficult since literally nobody knows what they want.

So now Carrie has run into the Mistake from when she was 26, 29, and 31 (and 3pm that afternoon). And he’s like “omg hello! I was pissed at you at 3pm but now I’m relieved that you want the exact same kind of relationship that I want!” Which is… 3pm sex??? And nothing else??

Y’all PLZ.

“Now we can have sex without commitment!” -Mistake (26,29,31,3pm). And now Carrie is disappointed. WHAT DID SHE THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN? Allos be playing mind games, for real.

Mistake: “I like this new you, call me.” Carrie: Depression, regret, anger, pretty much all the 5 stages of grief while she mourns her confidence from 3pm.

Dude, maybe this was not a good idea?? Like did you WANT the unattached sex or no??? Because it seems like it was only good sex as long as he was upset afterwards and now that he wasn’t she’s sad too? Did you retroactively decide you didn’t enjoy the 3pm sex which you said earlier made you feel “powerful, potent, and alive”?? Carrie, WHICH IS IT?

Voiceover Carrie: “Did all men secretly want their women promiscuous and emotionally detached?” Probably not, but if you purposely go for Mistake 26,29,31 with the intention of having promiscuous and emotionally detached sex because that’s what he’s given you in the past, that’s what you’re going to get???? Like??? You’re picking the wrong people to try to do things with?? (I was going to say the wrong people to have sex with but I feel like anyone willing to immediately have 3pm sex is in the same category anyway).

HUIRDFJKNIURGJFNDK Her friend Samantha just spotted Mr. Big and called him “The Next Donald Trump.” Oh my goodness. Laughing.

Next Donald Trump just did the cringiest little wave. He also waved when he saw Carrie on the street. Big ick.

And Carrie pretends she hasn’t met him. Why <3

Samantha says Next Donald Trump usually dates models. How do people know so much about these random people.

Now we’re back to Charlotte having some sort of date, and the guy asks her to come “back to” his “place.” Voiceover Carrie tells us she had wanted to play hard to get but doesn’t want the evening to end. Why are the only two options Sex on the First Date or Abruptly End the Date??

Charlotte’s date (Capote Duncan, hilarious name) starts kissing her neck and she asks to go home so he gets her a cab….. but then he GETS INTO THE CAB AND ASKS THE CAB DRIVER TO GO TO THE CLUB THE REST ARE AT AFTER HE DROPS OFF CHARLOTTE AT HOME.

WHAAAT.

Charlotte is like “Why are you going to the club?” And Mr. Capote Duncan with no sense of social etiquette for some reason responds “I understand where you’re coming from, and I totally respect it, but I really need to have sex tonight.”

??? HOW DARE HE?? What is this deal. How are these the eligible bachelors. All of these men are as horny as 12 year old boys who just discovered Playboy. None of them can keep it in their pants for 4 minutes and I don’t get anyones motives here. Clearly this dude Capote does not care about a second date with Charlotte after he just pulled that nonsense.

Back to Samantha, who seems to be the very sensual friend. She is propositioning Mr. Big to have a “private tour” of the downstairs of the club they’re in and Mr. Big turns her down.

And instead of being like, “okay he’s not interested,” Samantha takes this as a massive slight.

AAAAAaaand we’re back to Miranda and Skipper, who Miranda is politely(?) turning down, and then they start making out against a building. I do not get this.

AND NOW SAMANTHA IS IN CAPOTE DUNCANS APARTMENT MAKING OUT WITH HIM. Unbelievable. And he says she can’t stay over so the plan is literally thrust and bust.

Is this how normal sex lives work or is everyone in this show particularly amoral.

Ijdfknigfjkgijkthrgf

Carrie is wandering around outside, and Mr. Big drives up and says “well get in for Christ sakes” and she smiles like that’s a very sweet normal thing to say to someone you haven’t had an actual conversation with.

Carrie says she’s a “sexual anthropologist” to Mr. Big, who asked about her job. He gives me the creeps. I assume his long stares and slow deep voice are supposed to be sexy but it’s just bizarre and unnerving.

Mr. Big tells Carrie she’s “never been in love.” Voiceover Carrie then responds “suddenly I felt the wind knocked out of me.” Literally for what, Carrie.

She gets out of the cab, stops, then does a dramatic turn around to ask, “have you ever been in love?” It’s very film noir music and vibes right now. Mr. Big responds “Abso-f*cking-lutely” and then the window goes up and he pulls away in the literal most dramatic way and we freeze frame on Carrie.

Okay. That’s in. That’s the episode.

Most “ALLO SAY/DO WHAT?” Moments, in no particular order:

3pm sex with Mistake from 26, 29, and 31

Getting into the cab with your date so that you can go to the club to find someone else to have sex with

Carrie no longer liking the 3pm sex because Mistake liked it too

Skipper liking older women and being upset he hasn’t had sex in a year but giggling at the word p*ssy

Carrie getting into the cab with a strange man she literally barely knows because she thinks he’s “hot”

2.75/5 I think is my ranking. Too much sex.

#asexual #aromantic #aroace #sex and the city #sex and the city watch #live blog

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