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sirthisisa-wendys · 3 years

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Investigations (Part 3): Ran Haitani x Fem!Reader

synopsis: when things are uncovered, can you handle the truth? Or are you doomed to make a mistake you can't rectify?

wc: 2.1k

tw: violence

masterlist

song recommendation:

Ran's past was a lie.

When you met him at the country club five years ago, your pasts had been explained in hushed tones and excited flurries of memories; sharing photos of the time before he was an executive of the communications company he worked in and the time before you were a journalist.

Ran said he had gone to jail twice, both for crimes he had been an accessory to as a delinquent kid, but that he'd cleaned up his act after and made his way up the corporate ladder. Nothing about gangs or being a Heavenly King in Tenjiku made it past his lips.

You had been honest, too. Your tales included the time you'd accidentally happened upon a massive gang fight, and that's how your investigative journalism skills began to bloom.

Who was fighting?

What were they going to do after?

Where did these gangs come from?

When did this argument start?

Why were they fighting?

How did gangs form in the first place?

Those were all the questions you sought out answers for that night and the next five years after, devoting your time and effort to finding the truth about everything.

"Babe?" You freeze, hands hovering over the keys at the sound of Ran's voice. You don't turn around - you can't even look at him the same these days - but he fixes that by walking over to you and turning you around in your chair. "What are you doing up so late?"

"Just doing some writing." His violet eyes search yours for the truth, but you know he won't be able to find it. Not while you're still trying to unravel his past. Ran kisses your eyelids sweetly, cupping your face in his large palms and littering his love across your face as you try your best to remain still and not confess about your research.

"Come to bed. It's late."

"I've got a few more paragraphs," you explain, motioning to the small print on your screen. "I'll be in bed soon."

But your lie is discovered shortly thereafter. It's five a.m. when Ran returns, seeing you slumped against your desk, arms cushioning your head, laptop screen blank. Instinctively, Ran pulls you out of your seat - making your notebook fall to the ground - grunting softly as he scoops you up into his arms and cradles you against his chest.

You willingly allow your husband to carry you to bed, where your two-year-old is also nestled among the sheets and pillows, thumb tucked into his mouth. And for a moment, Ran appreciates the view, seeing the two people he loved the most - besides his younger brother - laying in the bed he paid for, in the house he built, in the city he owns.

But then he remembers the slight disarray you left your things in at the desk and returns, picking up your pencil and notebook before laying them beside the laptop. Then his eyes catch "Ran's past?" written in bold, red letters, along with the words: "Tenjiku" and "Tandai" also written in the web of other words surrounding his name. "South Terano" is also on that web.

He'd have to take care of that in the morning.

And for the first time in a long time, worry bubbles to the surface of his mind, and Ran rips the sheet of paper from your notebook, tossing it into the kitchen trashcan and considering his deed done. He concealed his past to protect his family. And he's concealing the present to achieve the same goal; all for the future to be revealed later. That's how everything should be.

Right? _____________________________________________________________

"Ran," you whisper, lips running across his knuckles. His fingers cup your jaw, and his own lips press against your forehead, violet eyes darkening slightly. "It's six am. Where are you going this early?"

"I have to go into the office for a little while," he murmurs, kissing your forehead again. "I'll be back around lunchtime." Thoughts of Tandai and Tenjiku flash into your mind for a moment, but you smile at him sleepily anyway, absolutely sure these things are part of his past and not in the present.

"We'll be waiting for you, my love."

Despite all of your best intentions, though, you can't help but be consumed by the idea of Ran out, fighting, stealing, maiming... You consider asking him about these things, these concerns, but you decide against it as you're helping Kai with his lunch. If he wanted to leave it in the past, there's a good reason for it. He would have told you if it would be a problem later. Right?

Ran wouldn't jeopardize your family, your home, your life for something so... juvenile.

Right?

The clatter of keys on the counter in the living room brings you back to the present, and you perk up, your two-year-old mimicking your expression.

"Daddy!" Kai slides down from his seat and runs to greet Ran, clutching his father's legs with all his little might.

"Hey, buddy," Ran laughs, stooping to pick up his son with excitement. "How are you doing?" As son and father have a very stimulating conversation about playtime, you watch them in wonder, observing the way Ran makes his child a priority, just like he makes you a priority. But your countenance falls as soon as you see the blood spot on the bottom of Ran's lavender suit jacket. You know its blood because of the way it dried - that's no ketchup stain.

You fake a smile anyway, giving Ran a kiss on the cheek and tugging his jacket off after he sits Kai back on the tile floor.

"Hard day?"

"Kind of," Ran mumbles, and you catch the sight of a long scratch down the side of his neck. "But I made it through." You hum, taking the pin-striped jacket to the laundry room and slinging it over the side of the washer. You'd need that later.

"Need to relax?" you wonder, and Ran grins at you mischievously.

"Maybe later, after bedtime?"

_____________________________________________________________

But "later" never came.

Instead, Ran and Kai fell asleep on the sofa, watching a kid's movie, and you retreated to the office, powering up your laptop and pulling your notebook closer.

You immediately notice something's wrong, as the notes you had before were missing. Everything is gone. Not even a word of all the research you had done was there. Hadn't you written meticulous notes and names and things about Ran's past that could be interconnected? You break out in a sweat and search in every drawer of the desk, every place it could possibly be. You come up with nothing, and let out a frustrated sigh before slumping down in your seat and pulling up the computer history from yesterday. If you had to rewrite every single thing, that's fine. You'd just need more time to gather your evidence for the meeting on Saturday.

You're knee-deep in articles and police reports when you stumble across a more recent - actually as recent as this morning - article titled: "Ex-gangster found dead in meat factory". The picture of South Terano startles you, and you click on it, feeling a sense of dread as the article details how he was found hanging upside-down in the warehouse with a bullet hole in his head. And just like that, your newest lead has fizzled out. You groan, writing down "South Terano, deceased" on your notepad, then exiting the tab.

There had to be someone else you could ask. Shuji Hanma only provided you with Ran and Rindou's names, no one else.

"What's this?"

The door to the office shuts softly, and you look over your shoulder at Ran, who is walking toward you with measured steps, his eyes taking in your exhausted expression and the way you're hunched over that notepad. Again.

"What are you doing? You look tired, babe. Let's go to bed, yeah?"

Suddenly, pieces begin to click as Ran leans his hip against the desk, staring down at you in the chair with squinted violet eyes. "You threw away my notes... Didn't you?"

"What are you doing in my business, y/n?"

"Why didn't you tell me that you were in two gangs?" you counter, fingers shaking slightly. "Ran, this is something I needed to know before--"

"You wouldn't have married me if I told you." Ran's tone is cold, almost as if he's turned into the past version of himself without batting an eye.

"You don't know that." Ran leans forward, coming to eye level with you a smirking.

"I know you. And that's all I need." Ran reaches out a hand to close the laptop, still smiling and maintaining eye contact. "Now here's what you're going to do. First, you're going to stop digging into my past. There's nothing there that you need to find. Second, you're going to come to bed. It's late, you're tired. Finally," Ran cups your chin like he did this morning, except his fingers aren't so tender this time. "You're going to cut off contact with both Shuji Hanma and Taiju Shiba. I'm not really fond of either of them, and I'm not a fan of having them tell my business to my wife."

"They were only doing it because I asked."

"Taiju, maybe. Shuji isn't so eager to fuck you. I doubt he did it out of the kindness of his heart." You can't say anything to refute his claims. Ran is probably right. But you can't get one question out of your mind.

"Why are you trying to hide your past? What's there that I won't like?"

"What isn't there is the real question."

"What can you tell me about the gang that's just surfaced in Tokyo?" Ran's face slackens, transforming into a half-surprised, half-blank look that you realize is one that means he's been caught. "Oh, my fucking god," you breathe, tears stinging your eyes. "South, the fish, the murders, the crime... It's you. It's been you this whole time. I've been chasing my own husband down." Panic begins to set in, and your mind whirls around as you shake in your seat, bringing your hands up to your head. "Just tell me Rindou isn't in this," you breathe, but Ran doesn't answer you, still wearing that dumb look on his face. You let out a cry of shock, covering your mouth and trying to back away from Ran as much as you can.

The source is a lot closer than you think.

You slide down the wall, shocked into stillness as your sobs quiet, and Ran straightens up, placing his hands in his sweatpant pockets. The long nights, the early mornings, the bloodstains, the damn suits... It all led to this. Ran had never really left his old lifestyle behind. He'd gotten caught up in it, and brought you and Kai into it unknowingly.

"I never meant for it to get this... unhinged." You can't reply, tucking your knees into your chest as you stare past Ran and at the opposite wall, wondering how you'd missed the signs, the obvious signs that Ran was up to no good. "I know this is a lot to take in, but we can--"

"I can't stay here."

The words fall from your mouth and Ran flinches, shaking his head.

"No. You can't leave."

"Yes, I can," you mumble, standing and wiping your tears. "I can do whatever I need to do to keep Kai safe, and--"

"Kai is safer here than out there," Ran snaps, pointing at the window. "I'm not letting my son out of my sight. Your snooping has caused enough trouble as it is; I wouldn't have had to go and clean up this morning if you hadn't--"

"Don't blame this on me," you retort, pointing at Ran accusatorially. "You're the one who joined a gang and is still in one! What kind of role model are you for our son now?"

"I provide the best way I can," Ran grits out, clenching his fists. "You've never gone hungry, cold, or ill-clothed a day in your life while you were with me."

"I would rather die than enjoy a life paid for with blood money."

"Blood money? You really think--" You try to push past Ran, but he grabs your shoulders, yanking you back in front of him. "You're not going anywhere except to our bed."

"Let me go, Ran Haitani," you mutter, hands balling up into little fists. "Or I'll scream."

"Who will hear you? Kai?"

How had you been so foolish? Ran's lips press together momentarily as his violet eyes run over your figure, taking stock of all your five-foot-six stature. You're no match for Ran. Not mentally, and certainly not physically. Ran notices your defeat and his hands slide down to your wrists, tugging your delicate hands up to his chest.

"Everything will be fine," he whispers, drawing you close. "I'm taking care of us. Just trust me."

Just trust me.

#ran haitani x reader #ran haitani #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers

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issaxcharlie · 3 years

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Falling like the stars✨

Pairing: Alive! Luke Patterson x Fem Reader

Summary: Luke and Y/N never got to be a thing. Whatever they had ended abruptly when she settled on someone with far more status than the aspiring guitarist. Months later, now single, Luke entangles her in a scheme to make Sunset Curve more popular. The only thing she needs to do is fake date him for 2 weeks.

Songs used: Holy Ground by Taylor Swift, Loved You First by One Direction and Falling Like The Stars by James Arthur.

High school is a world by itself. It has its own system and everyone moves through it. It is something that although it is not discussed, everyone knows. Including the three members of Sunset Curve, who are lying in the yard trying to find a solution to their latest problem.

"We need more people to support our music. If we can't get this little school to support us, how are we going to fill clubs or sign with a label?” Reggie wonders aloud to himself, no matter how hard they try, they can't get the Los Feliz student body to listen to their band.

“We should have thought about it before, Reg. Now we're just the problem kids who most likely won't finish school. Why would they come to see us at those seedy little clubs when they can go show off at football games.” Luke stands up suddenly after Alex words, one of those huge smiles that comes out when he has a really bad idea on his face.

“Well it seems that the solution is easy, boys. We have to make them see us on the same level as those jocks.”

“Oh yeah, and how are we going to do that, genius?” Alex fiddles with his hands as he rests his head on Reggie, both tired of not being able to come even close to fulfilling their dream.

Luke points to the nearest post, on which there are at least 5 posters to support the homecoming king and queen.

“Really? Do you think someone would vote for you? Before all those star athletes who also have a cheerleader to back them up? You basically have just us and I don't think I can do one of those tricks.”

“We’ll think of something. Winning that stupid thing would put us directly in the top of the pyramid. We’ll find a way, we always do.” Before anyone can respond, some screaming and commotion can be heard.

“Savannah is accusing Y/N to mess with her man! Run, they are in the hall!" students mention as they start running to watch the discussion.

“Oh god, Y/N. I’ll better go and see if I can help her somehow.” Alex gets up and Reggie begins to follow him, but not before turning to make sure Luke is following too. The guitarist makes an irritated face but ends up walking behind his friends.

From the moment they enter the main hall they can hear the screeches of probably the most popular girl in school, Savannah Miller. One of those typical unbearable girls who for some reason always reach the top of the elite in schools despite treating everyone badly.

Y/N Y/L is on the other side of the discussion, she looks calm and even bored. The first thing Luke digests from Savannah's words is that she thinks Y/N was making out with her idiot of a boyfriend during third period. What's interesting about the situation is that Diego cheated on Y/N with Savannah maybe a week and a half ago and had been dating her ever since.

But that's not Y/N's style, no matter how angry she is.

Luke knows her well enough, or so he wants to believe. She was always good friends with Alex and Reggie, and her relationship with them remained strong over the years despite how unstable and fleeting her relationship with the guitarist was.

He's never going to admit how deeply he felt for her. How much it screwed him up that just when he finally began to believe they could be something else, she completely walked away from his life so she could date the man that would end up cheating on her just because he looked more promising at the time. Rich, popular, the quarterback of the football team, the ‘perfect guy’ she said to the boys.

But hey, that's past.

Luke looks up to meet Y/N's eyes on him. In the moment she realizes she was caught, she sneakily turns to Alex, who is just inches from the guitarist and smiles at him.

“Are you actually smiling? You think this is funny?” The girl looks furious, but she's smart enough not to make this a battle of strength.

“I already told you, Savannah. It wasn’t me.”

“I can count, Y/N. Neither you nor Diego were in class."

And that’s when it hits him. The possibility of getting to the top of the pyramid in front of him. Because maybe Y/N is not the most popular, but it is undoubtedly one of the most loved by everyone. Intelligent, caring, beautiful, talented. And she certainly has the status after dating Diego Hernandez for one semester. No one had managed more than 3 months with him and the guitarist thinks that was a good sign that that idiot is not a good idea but well, it wasn’t his choice.

Luke begins to walk towards the center of the circle, Alex tries to stop him but cannot catch his arm in time. Both girls turn to see him surprised, but neither says anything.

"You can go find culprits elsewhere, Y/N was busy with me at the time. You can ask whoever you want and they'll tell you that I wasn't in class during third period either."

Of course, he wasn't there because the trio got into Reggie's old truck to get some hotdogs but no one has to know that.

His hand goes to take her firmly by the hip, just like all those nights that now only remain as memories. He is looking at every inch of her face, searching for her reaction, and is surprised by the naturalness with which the girl accepts the gesture. As if his hand belongs there. And maybe, just maybe, it does.

“Do you really want me to believe this?” Savannah asks, clearly annoyed.

“Y/N and Patterson? There’s just no way in hell. C’mon babe, he’s just pathetic, you could do better.” Diego says out loud as he approaches the scene in the middle of Y/N and Savannah.

There's something about the disgruntled way they both said it that makes Luke want to prove that a girl like her could want him. He doesn’t know how to distinguish if it is pride or insecurity but at the moment he is not interested.

He's barely going to open his mouth to defend himself when Y/N starts talking. "No. You can speak as badly as you want of me but you're not going to bring Luke into this."

Luke lets go of her so he can step back a few inches and see her from a better angle. She’s definitely not calm anymore. Her face looks altered and she is undoubtedly in protective mode. She turns to see him when she feels his hand leave her body but he offers her his hand and she intertwines it between her fingers without hesitation. At this rate she is taking control of the situation so he is going to let her continue and try to achieve his goal along the way.

“I know you need a partner to have any hope of winning the crown, but choosing Patterson is a desperate move.”

And that’s his cue. "If my baby wants that crown I will get it for her. It's that easy.”

“What? I do-” At that moment Luke panics and pulls her by the hand that they have intertwined and with the other holds her face while bringing their lips together. When he reacts to what he is doing he is afraid that Y/N will push him in front of everyone but to his surprise she kisses him back instantly, releasing his hand to bring him closer to the neck.

The kiss is passionate and almost desperate, but it only lasts a few seconds since a voice brings them back.

"This feels like deja vu." Reggie whispers to Alex, they both walked during the discussion towards the circle and are so close that Luke and Y/N heard him clearly.

“Well, we already clarified that she was not with your boyfriend so, I’ll take my girl. It was a pleasure, we should repeat this another day... said no one ever." Luke takes her hand and leads her to the nearest empty living room, Reggie and Alex locking the door behind him.

“What the hell was that crown bullshit? Why did you even cover for me? What are you up to? At least tell me is fun... or that includes you shirtless.” She jokes, a cheeky smile spreads in Luke’s face.

“I need a favor and thought you’ll appreciate an alibi.” She raises her eyebrow in reflex.

“Why would I help you, Lucas?” Luke can only think of how she makes a name as simple and boring as Lucas sound so sexy when she says it. Is incredible.

“Cut the act, beautiful. We both know you've never been able to resist me.” Y/N laughs amused at the boy’s sassiness. She won't admit it but she missed his eyes on her. She missed the way he uses that cocky stupid voice that melts her when he wants something. How he gets closer with each sentence, or his lips on her mouth.

Before she can counter attack, Alex stands in front of the guitarist raising his hands. “I know he’s an idiot, but we really need your help, Y/N. If we want Sunset Curve to gain popularity we have to start here, and this is our last year. Gaining popularity among the elite of the school would help us a lot.”

“We are getting desparate.” Reggie adds, a sad smile on his face.

“And pretending I made out with Luke in third period and getting to be homecoming dance queen and king helps you... why?”

“That crown is literally a test of popularity and status. It would put Luke on the same level as the popular kids like Savannah and Diego. People would be more interested in Sunset Curve after that. For now, for them we are only three good for nothing that one day will not appear around here again. You heard yourself that those two didn't think Luke was good enough."

Her face flushes with anger as soon as she remembers the contemptuous tone of voice they used to refer to Luke. If they hadn't been in the middle of the hall, she probably would have said a lot more than she did. That single comment is enough to make her decide, so without thinking Y/N asks “What do you need me to do?”

“Just play perfect couple with Luke until homecoming dance. Then you are queen and king, Sunset Curve gets the fans we deserve, you get to laugh at Savannah’s face and you can separate next day if you want to.”

“I’m not sure If someone is going to believe it.” She blurts out loud as she glances at the guitarist.

“Oh please, you know each others mouth better than your own names.” Reggie says without thinking, Luke snorted with laughter and Y/N blushes like crazy.

“Yeah, and you used to spend a lot of time together too, two weeks shouldn’t be that hard.” Alex tries to recover the seriousness of the situation to close the deal.

“Okay then. If I can help Sunset Curve and get that smirk of superiority off Savannah's face then sounds good to me. Are you willing to date me, Patterson?”

Their eyes meet again and without a sign of hesitation her now officially boyfriend for the next two weeks, answers.

“Beautiful, you have no idea.”

There is something about relationships that never get to happen that make the heart weigh more, that nostalgia to be stronger, the person more difficult to forget. Luke can't help but remember during the last periods of the day just how good it felt to taste the girl's lips again. Feelings of desire, of familiarity, of belonging. All colliding and going deep into his bones.

He decided a long time ago he didn't do relationships, but if he did, it would have been with her. He was willing to break that rule for her, but she had the final decision and it wasn't him. He accidentally put himself in the perfect situation though. All those what if’s will finally have an answer.

For two weeks he can test what it would have been if Y/N Y/L had chosen him. And when he finally tries the experience he will be free. Free from all the what if’s, free from her, from her memory. And there's also the part of how much the band will benefit. The main objective of doing this, obviously.

The last hour is finally over and Luke sped off toward Reggie's truck. In front of it is Alex already waiting and he can see Reggie and Y/N also walking in the same direction. The four of them regroup and Y/N starts to discuss game plan.

“If we are going to do this, we are going to do it well. There will be a party at Finch's house this Saturday and the three of you are coming with me."

The three members of Sunset Curve make an annoyed face at the words of their friend. "That's exactly why no one supports you. You think you are too cool to hang out with the people but then you want everyone to happily buy your shirts and listen to your music."

“She has a point there.” Alex agrees, and puts his arm around her shoulder.

“Okay, let’s do this. If you all come with me, we can leave early and crash one of those places you usually play. Maybe even have some people of the party to come with us and hear you rock the shit out of that place.” All three smile with bright eyes In response.

“You got yourself a deal, pretty lady.” Reggie says in a flirting tone and winks at her. Luke gives him a light punch on the arm.

"I'll see you on Saturday in my house then, at nine. Goodbye boys." She winks at Luke and walks over to her car, making sure to do a perfect walk because she knows pretty well that the guitarist isn't going to stop watching her until she pulls out of the parking lot.

Luke gives her a perfect smile one last time before Y/N leaves school. These two weeks are going to be weird.

The four members of the band are in the truck, Bobby decided to get out of school recently but a party and a gig sounds like a rad Saturday. Luke gets out and walks to the door to wait for Y/N to come out. When she finally comes down he feels like all the air is coming out of his lungs.

She's wearing the black Sunset Curve t-shirt that he forgot one of the many times he climbed up to the second floor of the house to see her. A short black skirt and one of his red flannels that he probably left there several months ago as well. Black fishnets stockings which he can't help but imagine ripping out with his teeth, her lips in that tone of red that drives him crazy, and her classic black boots that he hadn't seen since she started dating the cheating idiot.

“Genius huh? Is there anything that says more ‘Luke Patterson’s property’ than this? I don’t think so." She smiles proudly and blushes when she notices Luke's gaze locked on her legs. Fishnets may have been included in the outfit due to a certain weakness that the musician has towards them.

The hair that the guitarist is used to seeing in a perfect bun lately, is now loose and tousled. As rebellious as the day he met her, moving in harmonious tune to the rhythm of Now or Never.

Luke reaches out to to entwine his hand in her hair and whispers slowly into her ear “You look... fucking hell, you are not playing fair, baby.” Lightly biting her lobe when he’s done speaking.

They both linger in a trance for a few seconds, considering whether they should just walk in and lock the door. But before they can decide, the boys that already know this story pretty well and are sick of waiting for them while they flirt, get out of the truck. Reggie carries Y/N like a sack of potatoes and between Bobby and Alex take Luke by the arms, putting them in the vehicle so they can finally get to the lame party and then, the gig.

When they finally arrive, the eyes of almost all the girls go to the members of the band, who are definitely dressed for the occasion. Y/N can't help but notice how most of the cheerleaders wink at her boyfriend. Yeah, it’s not real and will last two weeks, but for now she justs wants to forget that part and enjoy the feeling of him being hers.

So she makes a small, harmless gesture to mark territory and puts her hand in the guitarist's back pocket.

Luke turns to see her, an amused smirk on his face. “Jealousy looks so hot on you, I wouldn't mind if you marked my lips with that red lipstick too."

That statement resonates in Y/N’s head. All the times Diego refused to kiss her so as not to stain himself and even forbade her to use that lipstick that for her was part of her brand returning to her head. Followed quickly by every night Luke came down after finishing playing and instantly attacked her lips with his, caring for nothing more than the feel of their tongues fighting for control.

“Not jealousy, just a quick reminder to everyone. You are all mine tonight.” She puts a little more pressure on the hand in his pocket and stands on her tiptoes to kiss the corner of his lips.

“Dance with me?” She asks innocently while giving him a flirtatious smile.

“With you, always beautiful.” He smiles back, winking charmingly.

His hands find hers and she begins to dance and jump gracefully to the rhythm of the music as he spins her around, both singing the lyrics to each other with unmatched energy, happy to be together.

“Tonight I'm gonna dance, for all that we've been through.” She sings with a determined voice, taking the musician by the hair and bringing their faces closer.

“But I don't wanna dance, If I'm not dancing with you.” Luke returns the verse with the same passion, just inches separating their lips. His beautiful and trained voice tends to sound like a more country vibe when he gets carried away and especially in more pop melodies like this, and honestly drives her crazy.

The fact that the rocker at heart gave in to listen to other genres for her and even remembered the lyrics was enough to melt her heart. The last time she was able to let herself go and sing at the top of her lungs like this was with him, listening to a mix of their favorite songs in his car while going for their favorite icecream. Whatever they had was a lot more deeper than what they are willing to admit.

“Did we really just see Luke sing and dance to a pop-country song?” Reggie asks the band, Alex and Bobby behind him laughing at the guitarist who blushes and kisses his date's forehead. “I am not going to discuss this. I'll go get us something to drink." He winks at her and dissapears into the crowd.

“I’ll go too, be right back.” Bobby announces leaving Y/N with Alex and Reggie, who smirk at her.

“It seems that pretending is easier than you thought.” Alex can't stop smiling, Reggie playfully itches the girl's ribs who grins from ear to ear.

"Everything always fits when I'm with him. I ruined my chance. I'm totally aware, and I'm not expecting anything from him, because I honestly don't deserve it. But I plan to enjoy every second of these two weeks that came from heaven to the fullest.”

“You should explain hi-” Before Reggie can finish speaking, Diego appears behind Y/N and tries to forcefully pull her by the arm.

The guys manage to react quickly and release her arm while stepping in front of her. But right away his teammates get behind him.

“Save yourselves the pain, she is going with me.” Diego says confidently, his face showing arrogance.

“Guys, ple-” She tries to stop them from getting hurt, but both step a little forward, determined to protect her no matter the cost.

“You are not taking her, Diego. But you are more than welcome to try.” Alex's voice sounds cool and calm, but Y/N can see how much his hands are shaking and her heart hurts at the sight.

They are all so into their own business that nobody notices the guitarist's return until his lips collide with his girl, who is surprised for a few seconds but immediately recognizes him and gives him space for his tongue to taste her mouth.

They both lose themselves in the kiss for a few seconds longer than necessary and then slowly separate. Y/N grinning from ear to ear as she tries to wipe some of her lipstick off Luke's mouth. He just smirks, as happy as ever.

"Sorry guys, do you need something?" He plays the innocent card. After that kiss, most of the people at the party are watching the scene, so Diego, who looks furious, chooses to leave without saying anything. Right away they can hear a long restrained breath from Reggie and Alex.

“You are a cocky genius, I'm not sure we could have won that one.”

“I’m not sure? Did you seriously think we had a chance?” Alex asks, clearly anxious after what had just happened.

Y/N stands in front of them and throws herself into their arms, whispering how many thanks she can say in a row. They return the hug and begin to relax in each others arms. Bobby and Luke join in the hug, and Luke whispers his own thanks to his friends.

The band decides that it’s time to go and to their surprise, when they let people know that they are going to play at a small club in the center of the city, some decide to follow them. On the way, Y/N spends her time wiping her lipstick off Luke’s face with some wipes she had in her bag, struggling not to press her lips against his every time he made her an adorable grimace or a flirtatious smile.

“You know the drill, beautiful.” Luke turns to see her directly in the eyes, concern on his face just like every time before.

“Front row, not a second out of your sight, so if I need something better wait for you guys to finish performing to get it. Better safe than sorry." She recites, proud to remember every word.

“Thank you, baby.” He smiles a little more calmly, gives her a light kiss on the cheek and starts to help take out the instruments.

They are only doing a few songs from their repertoire, but the energy they transmit drives everyone in the little club crazy. The Sunset Curve members look at a Luke they haven't seen in a long time. The energy and passion in his voice dedicated entirely to the little woman in the front row who sings with all her strength every word and melody, imitating Luke's guitar solos or Alex's drums with her arms.

The 15 students who decided to attend are close to Y/N, trying to get her attention from time to time but nothing can take her eyes off her friends. Not even she knew how much she had missed seeing them play. The look of maximum happiness on their faces.

The last song is one that the little club seems quite familiar with, but she had never heard it before. So it must have been written in the last six months.

“Had my chances, could've been where he is standing.

That's what hurts the most, girl, I came so close

But now you'll never know. Baby, I loved you first.”

The lyrics leave her breathless. Luke, who had made contact with her practically all night, now seems to avoid her eyes like a plague. She definitely has to ask Alex about this song before getting any ideas.

The four bow and get off the stage, Luke launches immediately for Y/N, some of the girls try to get his attention and even try to grab him by the arm or waist but he remains firm until his hands meet his girl's hip.

“What do you think?” Luke's fingers shaking in the grip on her waist tell her he's nervous. The fact that her opinion of them matters so much to him that it makes him feel insecure makes her heart skip a beat.

“It was amazing as always, rockstar.” A huge smile appears on the guitarist's face, who gently takes her face with his hands and kisses her nose. After all, he has to remember that they are only pretending to date and for now he has no good reason to push his lips against hers. It doesn't matter how much he needs her.

The way home is uneventful, Y/N sleeping in Luke's arms while Alex puts the guitarist's red flannel over her.

“Will they ever stop pretending they're ridiculously in love with each other?” Bobby asks Reggie as he turns his head to see the couple.

“They are both stubborn and allergic to real feelings. Especially love. They are so terrified that they have to sabotage themselves somehow.” Alex answers for Reggie who just nods without taking his eyes off the road.

"Do you really have to talk like I'm not here?" Luke asks, resting his chin delicately on the head of the woman in his arms.

Tonight felt unreal. Felt practically like one of the many dreams he has had with the girl throughout these months. Seeing her in his clothes was enough to make the night special, but without a doubt dancing in her arms, savoring every inch of her mouth and seeing her energetically sing each of his songs to end the night with her in his arms is just perfect. Reggie parks at Y/N’s after dropping Alex and Bobby, and as Luke decides how to get her to bed without waking her she sinks deeper into his chest.

"Carry me to the door hotstuff, I like to be in your sexy arms." Luke lets out a cheeky laugh in surprise, another laugh coming from Reggie.

“She’s so asleep, I can’t. Adorable though.” Luke agrees and takes her bag before walking down with her in his arms and carrying her effortlessly to the door.

“Thank you for tonight. I didn’t think I could ever feel this happy and complete again.” She murmurs in his ear before giving him a sweet peck in the lips and enter the house.

What the two of them took from tonight is that indisputably, they are both still head over heels for each other. But it was like that the first time and it just wasn't enough.

Days go by with the couple being the school's favorite gossip. People talking in the hallways about the special way Luke looks at his girlfriend, comparisons about the dry way Y/N used to be with Diego compared to how she is with the guitarist, always touching him somehow and spending all the time with him as possible, visibly much happier. Some also talking about how good the band sounds and wondering why they hadn't heard it before. Everything going according to plan.

On Thursday afternoon, Luke arranged to pick her up for the two of them to find him something formal enough for the dance. When Y/N opened the door she met his beautiful greenish hazel eyes, and swears that for a second she forgot how to breathe.

She knows this scene. He smiles sweetly at her, takes her hand and opens the door of the car for her. Multiple interesting memories inside this car coming back to her mind. His firm hands on her legs, his tongue testing her mouth, his hot moans after biting his lower lip...

“Beautiful? Whatcha thinking?” Luke's voice brings her back to the present, his hand goes directly to her thigh as all that many midnight drives and without saying anything he plays the girl's favorite album.

That’s it. If she wants a chance with him, she needs to make this right. “I- We really need to talk.” Hearing the tone of her voice, Luke senses what is coming. He was here before. So he turns off the car that hadn't even started to move yet and turns to look at her.

"I know we've been putting it off, but we have to talk about how it all ended, I-"

Luke interrupts her before she can finish, his voice sounds broken, sad, angry. "I really don't want to talk about how you preferred an idiot for whom you don't feel the remotest thing just because he'll get a football scholarship and this perfect future.”

She spends a few seconds processing his words. Did he really say what she thinks he said? "It wasn't like that, Luke."

"I know it looks like I can't compete with him, but I would have done anything for you. And I thought you knew that.”

She doesn't know what to do or say. She was so unconscious, so selfish, so heartless, that she didn't even think about how he could have understood the situation. In how much he must have suffered these months watching her with Diego, believing he wasn’t good enough. Believing that she chose someone who wasn’t him, because he wasn’t good enough.

He stays quiet, examining the girl who seems about to cling to tears. The anger evaporates instantly and he leans into her seat to wrap his arms tightly around her. She starts sobbing, but seems determined to talk.

“R- Remember the night we met? It was the first Sunset Curve presentation. I had just entered the little club, but your voice dragged me to the front row like a magnet. And when I was finally in front of the stage, I knew it. It was you. The butterflies that everyone talks about for the first time in my stomach. I knew I could never feel again something even close to what I was feeling at that moment.

I got carried away in your voice, dancing to the rhythm of the melody and recording every sound in my head. And when I opened my eyes again, yours were staring at me. And I understood that you felt it too. It was me, and you knew it. It was so natural, powerful, magnetic, deep. I loved you since the first day, Luke. How is that not going to scare me?

When the feelings started to get so strong they burned, I knew I had to run. You always made it very clear that relationships were not your thing, I could not continue to wait for something that from the beginning you made it clear you could not give.

Then Diego arrived at the right time to give me an exit, and I took it. I knew he just wanted to have me around to raise his good boy status, and feeling nothing was safer than feeling too much. So I lied. I lied to you, to me, to everyone. And I’m sorry, but I was so scared. I was a coward who should have done things differently.”

When she finally finishes pulling out what she's been saving for months, she pulls away from Luke to see his face. His eyes look crystal clear, his cheeks red. But his beautiful white smile lights up his face.

"Next time you love me so much that you can't bear it, let me know, please? I can step on your foot or sneeze in your face. I was literally going to ask you to be my girlfriend that weekend. I even wrote you a song."

“You were? The one you sang the other night?”

“Okay, I wrote you a lot of songs. Maybe too many. But the one I'm talking about is different. Maybe I'll let you listen to it one day. If you stick around long enough this time.”

She smirks and kiss him lightly on the lips, enjoying the feeling of being able to. He knows he reacted way too chill. But he also understands her feelings. What is the point of reproaching her for something they can no longer change? A bad decision made by a love so immense that it left her blind. He is simply not willing to waste any more time. They are finally going to do things right. Neither of them is going to self-sabotage it this time, and since he doesn't trust it, he'll put Alex and Reggie in charge to make sure.

The night of the dance arrives. Y/N is wearing a beautiful black dress and her classic red lips. Luke tried his best to look fancy and he's wearing a pretty cool suit but in a sleeveless version. His still fake girlfriend couldn't stop smiling when she saw him. Just perfect.

Dancing in his arms, letting him go only once in a while to dance with the other three members of Sunset Curve made the night amazing. The rest of these two weeks they spent it talking, laughing... making out. Enjoying the most of the time they lost. Even completely forgetting why they were faking it in the first place, until they ask the candidates to take the stage.

"And your king are queen are... Y/N Y/L and Diego Hernandez!"

They all turn to see Luke in shock. Just hearing their names together is enough to make him frustrated, but there's not much he can do right now. And that's when he remembers what he asked the boys to play for the king and queen's first dance. Great, now dance they’ll dance to his song together. Just his damn luck. He sabotaged himself again without imagining it.

They are crowned and Diego offers her his hand, not without first throwing a face of superiority to the guitarist. She walks but continues straight until she is in front of her lover.

Luke looks at her strangely, she smiles at him.

“But I don't wanna dance, If I'm not dancing with you. Remember?” She sings happily in his ear, and offers her hand.

“Dance with me?” He looks at her adoringly and takes her hand.

“Always, beautiful.”

They walk to the center of the floor, Alex begins to sing the first verse. Y/N rests her head on Luke's chest, her hands around his neck, as he presses her against him by the hip, wrapping her in his arms. His head bent to sing the song in her ear.

“I swear to God, I can see... you're still the girl in the club.”

Tears of happiness begin to flow from Y/N, the words that she never had the opportunity to know, finally getting revealed. Luke's sweet, soft voice in her ear. The perfect melody and the beautiful voice of Reggie and Alex in the background.

“And I need you to know that we're fallin' so fast

We're fallin' like the stars, fallin' in love.”

The moment he sings in love, Y/N lifts her head to meet his eyes. He lifts his hands to her cheeks to wipe her tears, gently holding her face to make sure she sees him recite every word.

“And I'm not scared to say those words. With you, I'm safe.

We're fallin' like the stars, we're fallin' in love.”

The second Luke finishes singing, Y/N stands on tiptoe and pushes her lips against his. Tears of happiness continue to fall from her face, wrapped in a passionate, slow, deep kiss. He's all she wants. Her heart chose him since the very first day.

“I can’t believe one of Luke’s random ideas it's what made them find their way back to each other. Reg, we tried for 6 months and we were never even close. Two weeks ‘pretending’ and bam! they are just fine.”

Both watch the happy couple dance now that they are official.

"You know what they say, Fake it till you make it.” Reggie smirks while watching Luke happily kiss Y/N.

“Fair. At least everything was fixed before we shoved Luke into the pool to see if Y/N would rescue him with a mouth-to-mouth kiss."

“We still could try, you know... for science.”

“Cool. Monday works for me. Do you think that even though he didn't win, we still have a chance to win some more fans?”

Reggie raises his head before answering, a smile appears when he sees the bunch of girls and boys who are spying on them just a few meters away. Probably waiting for them to finish talking to get closer.

“I think Sunset Curve will be just fine too, Alex.”

Thank you for reading✨

Taglist: @writerinlearning , @ghostofmgg, @strangerthanfanfiction713, @thebloodthirstyvampress, @kinda-really-lost, @kcd15, @magnet-girl, @aliandthephantoms, @stxrkspidey, @pinkrockstar19, @s0uz4s, @shycupcakealissa @cookiebuba, @fangirlangioma, @sageellsworth05, @twist3dtinkerbell, @sunsetcurvenotsunsetswerve, @caitsymichelle13, @ifilwtmfc, @luckylouiebug, @bibliophilewednesday, @totomoshi, @siennanoelle01, @lunashadow6955, @bookfrog247, @morganayennefertyrell, @kiss-themoongoodbye, @rachelle3musicals, @imsydneywalker, @really-dont-forget-it @agentstarkid @talksoprettyjjx @kaitieskidmore1

#luke patterson imagine #luke patterson imagines #luke patterson fic #luke patterson oneshot #luke patterson fanfiction #luke patterson x y/n #luke patterson x reader #luke patterson #luke jatp #jatp imagine #jatp one shot #charlie gillespie fic #charlie gillespie imagine #charlie gillespie imagines #charlie gillespie x reader

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annie-blackhill · 3 years

Text

Aight, I know that I've been away for awhile but now I'm back and I have ideas babes!

____________________________________

Warnings:

Depression

Anxiety

Past panic attacks

Mentions of past domestic violence

Abusive childhood

Post traumatic events unconscious coping mechanisms

Unconscious flinching out of instinct

Sudden panic when hearing fighting between a man and a woman screaming very near

Loss of breath

Domestic violence

Blood

Panic attack

____________________________________

Dazai Osamu

________________

Safe and Sound

________________

Dazai and (Y/N) have been in a relationship for two years now. They're so in love with each other that everyone at the ADA are questioning the fact as to why they weren't married yet.

Dazai really loves (Y/N) and she loves him just as much back. They both really love each other and they both understand each other the most too.

But there were still some things that Dazai didn't know.

The main reason why (Y/N) and Dazai weren't married yet was because Dazai wanted to get her parents' blessings first. He was so excited to get their blessings, to meet the people who brought his perfectly imperfect lover into this cruel, tainted world.

He was eternally grateful to them for bringing her into this world, although the cruel world had tainted her and made her the broken person she is now, he still loves her for her. She's the only reason he has to live now. And he loves her for that.

Whenever Dazai asked (Y/N) about her family, she would tell him stories about when she was a child and how her dad would bring them to the beach every weekend because they lived near to the beach or when they went back to school shopping together.

But that was it. Her dad never really appeared in her other stories much. He would pop in at some point of the tale and then disappear. Her mum, was mostly the one to witness her achievements.

But (Y/N) has never described her parents' proud expressions whenever she achieved something.

At times, when Dazai did pry lightly, she would turn the story somewhere else, mostly to her friends.

He knew that she didn't really have a good primary school life, seeing as she's told him before that she's been bullied at that time. She's described them as the loneliest years of her life and how much she's hated herself those times.

Whenever (Y/N) talked about friends, it would be about her friends from her high school life. Her high school was much more on the better side.

She had been a prefect in her high school years, since her first year to her last year.

The only bad memories she had was when she realized that being in the first class and being the top of the class meant the other students would sabotage her and the two times in her senior years where she had to fight back as self-defense when she tried to break up a fight and they started to hit her too.

Dazai wasn't daft. Of course, he picked up on all the signs she showed that she wasn't really fond of her parents.

At first, he thought that it was just because of a small fight they had. But two years have passed in their relationship and (Y/N) hasn't cracked even the least to tell him why her childhood stories are only until a certain age or why she's never told him how proud her parents were of her.

Dazai was worried. In the end, he decided that maybe her parents just have a slightly tight relationship with each other.

Dazai decided to not ask. He let it slide and slip past them. He never touched the subject of her parents for the half of the second year of their relationship.

As the other half year of their relationship rolled in, Dazai and (Y/N) had saved enough money to buy a cozy little apartment near the ADA and move out of the ADA's hostel.

The day they were moving in, the couple were greeted by the middle aged woman who lived next door with her husband and 4 year old daughter.

She had been a very sweet auntie that welcome the sweet couple to the apartment complex with open arms and a sweet smile.

More than once had she cooked good food for the duo since they always returned late from work.

"You two kinda remind me of how my husband and I used to be when we were younger and so in love," the auntie would say to the duo all the time.

The little 4 year old would also come by and play around with the loving couple whenever they were on leave.

Auntie would always try persuade her daughter from "disturbing the lovely young couple" as she would always say to her daughter.

"It's alright, auntie! I love kids! (N/N)-chan and I are planning to have a few little munchkins like this when we're married too!" Dazai would assure her, while playing with the little girl.

But there was always something about how (Y/N) would send the auntie knowing looks as though she knew something that he didn't all the time, so he decided to pay more attention too.

When Dazai did start to notice more, he noticed the dark bags under the auntie's eyes and he noticed how tired she always was.

The more he noticed the more concerning she looked to him day by day.

"Auntie, would you like to join us for tea, today? Osamu and I wanted to play with that sweet little angel," (Y/N) invited the auntie.

"WHO'S THAT AT THE DOOR???!!!" the booming voice of the male from inside the auntie's house shook (Y/N) to the core and it ignited old memories that she didn't have to remember.

"Auntie, you really should come. Osamu insists! You know how he gets when he doesn't get what he wants! He'll be whining all day long like a little baby!" (Y/N) tried to convince the auntie discreetly.

"I ASKED 'WHO'S THAT AT THE DOOR'! ANSWER ME YOU USELESS WOMAN!!!" the man shouted from the bedroom again.

(Y/N) flinched. She was regretting sending Dazai to the store now. They had been running low on groceries and she had sent Dazai to the store, as she would say "please contribute you're lazy arse to do something in this household, my love" and he had carried his lazy arse to the store near the apartment complex.

After Dazai had left was when she started to hear the shouts and yells from the next door auntie's house.

Even as the bad memories plunged her being, she had forced herself to go and at least try to save the auntie before anything bad happened to either her or her daughter.

But even then, if you looked closely at (Y/N) you could see that she was trembling badly and that she could barely stand on her two feet.

"Auntie, come on please!" (Y/N) begged in a mutter exclamation.

"I'm sorry," the auntie murmured before closing the door on her with an apologetic smile.

"Auntie, no!" (Y/N) exclaimed.

And that was when she heard the terrible screams and the yell. The cries of the little 4 year old teared her soul apart into the smallest of pieces.

"NO, NO, NO!!!!" (Y/N) yelled as her mind turned blank and the memories flooded her brain.

Her mind turned so blank that she forgot that she was slamming her fists onto the door and that she had an ability.

The memories of how her father would come home drunk and lay on the sofa. Of how her mother had found out that he was having an affair. Of how, he would beat the living daylights out of her mother.

(Y/N) never told Dazai any of that. She felt ashamed to tell him that her childhood was the most terrible thing to ever happen to her.

A blood curdling screamed pierced the air along with a loud cry and that was enough for (Y/N) to snap out of her traumas and remember that there were lives on the stake right now.

She finally regained her senses fully and remembered that she has an ability.

Using her elemental abilities, she bent the wooden front door so much that it broke it half and broke off of it's hinges. The lower half flew to the side of the corridor almost hitting her while the other half flew into the house and hit the middle aged aggressive man that was about to beat his wife over the head with a glass flower vase.

The auntie stood in shock as the younger woman ran to her and hugged her.

"Auntie! Are you alright?! Are you bleeding anywhere?! Do you have any fatal injuries?!" (Y/N) questioned quickly as she held the shorter's woman's face in her hands and looked her over, making sure that she wasn bleeding anywhere majorly.

"Why you little freak show! You must one of those freak shows that are born with those little abilities! How dare you interfere with someone else's family problems?! Youngsters these days don't know how to respect their elders! Let me teach you then!" the man yelled at (Y/N) as she stood in front of the trembling woman, making sure that the older woman was perfectly hidden behind her.

(Y/N) slipped a hand into the back pocket of her jeans. She clutched the holster of her gun.

"Step away, right now before I seriously hurt you," (Y/N) warned as she held her left hand out to stop him from coming any nearer to them.

The man took off his belt and folded it into two, straightening it out with a snap, which caused both women to flinch as more dark memories flooded into (Y/N)'s mind.

"I said STOP RIGHT THERE!" (Y/N) warned yet again. It was against the law for her to shoot him and she couldn't even use her abilities against him as he was a normal civilian.

She was trying her best to not hurt anyone here and let the civilian authorities handle the ruthless man.

The moment the man raised his arm was the same time (Y/N) slipped her gun out of her back pocket and shot his arm.

The man let out a cry of pain and fell back from the sudden pain. He looked at the younger woman, wide eyed as she held the gun tight and pointed the barrel to his forehead.

"Armed Detective Agency member, (L/N) (Y/N)," (Y/N) announced as she showed him her ADA card.

The man backed away more at that. His eyes wide as he realized that she was a member of the authorities.

"(Y/N)?!" Dazai shouted as he entered only to see the bloodied situation of the man and the two trembling women.

"Where's the child?!" Dazai asked immediately.

"Sh-she's in her room," the auntie answered meekly.

Dazai nodded. He looked down at the man, disgust, venom and a desire to kill clear on his face.

The man even then, still tried to gain Dazai's pity as Dazai was a fellow man too.

"S-sir! All I was trying to do was educate my wife to be more better and obedient! I wasn't trying to do anything other than that! I swear!" the man said.

That only made Dazai even more disgusted as he spat on the man's face in disgust. He stomped his foot harshly on the man's hand that was holding the belt.

"You disgust me you old fool! You're an utter disgrace of a human being! I'm disgusted to see people like you are still alive! Terrorizing women's lives! Making them only feel like obedient dolls that should only do whatever you say!

I'd rather kill you then let you go to jail and then get back out after a few months! People like you shouldn't exist at all in the first place!

Your wife is supposed to be your life partner! Not some maid or toy that would do everything you say! You're supposed to live life and do everything together!

I can't believe you even had a child with her only to state your dominance over her and make her unable to run away from you!

You disgust me!" Dazai yelled at the man as he twisted his foot on the man's hand more and stomped it over and over and over again, intent on breaking it.

(Y/N) shielded the auntie's sight form her lover's rage as he broke the man's hand and rendered it completely shattered under his shoe.

"Osamu..." (Y/N) called out for him.

Dazai raised his head to look at his lover, tears streaming from his eyes from utter pure white hot rage.

"Are you alright? Are the two of you alright? Is that little angel injured?" Dazai's voice turned so soft that (Y/N)'s heart broke at the mere sound of it. He sounded as scared as she was feeling.

Dazai went over to the two women and squeezed them into a light hug, he buried his face into the crook of (Y/N)'s neck. (Y/N) hugged his waist, her arm practically limp, but her hand still clutching the gun tight just in case the man tried anything, her ear was placed against his frantically beating heart.

The older woman had wrapped her arm over his back and was hugging him tight, scared out of her life and grateful for the presence of the two youngsters at the moment.

"Osamu... We need to call the police and the ADA, specifically Kunikida-san. We need to explain a hell load to them all," (Y/N) murmured lightly to the shaken man.

Dazai nodded lightly at her statement before pressing a light kiss to the crook of her neck and removing himself from the hold of the two women.

"Auntie, do get your little girl and wait outside of the house. (Y/N) and I will call the police and our co-worker to handle the mess here," Dazai informed the older woman.

She merely nodded, not trusting her voice to be strong enough to answer him as she went to the little girl's bedroom to get her out of the house.

Once the child and woman were safely out of the house, Dazai dialed Kunikida while (Y/N) dialed the police station.

Both at had arrived at the house. The man was brought away on a stretcher by the paramedics as (Y/N) was explaining to the police as to why she had used her gun.

Kunikida and Dazai, both standing on either side of her, trying to justify the reason as to why she did so and the police accepted the reasons in the end.

Dazai said his end of the story and then they moved on to ask the wife and the child about their ends of the story.

"(Y/N), you know you shouldn't have used your gun. I'll have to confiscate it for now. You'll only be allowed to use it on missions. I'm sorry but those are the rules that you need to follow after that little act of 'misusage' as the police says," Kunikida sighed as he took the gun lightly from her slightly slackened grasp on it now.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I was scared and he raised the belt above me, ready to hit at any moment---" her voice cracked and she couldn't continue the sentence anymore.

Kunikida held her hand softly as Dazai brought (Y/N) into a soft side hug, holding her softly and rubbing her shoulders.

"I know and that's why I'm the one that's supposed to be saying sorry for taking away your gun, (Y/N)," Kunikida said.

"Hey, hey. It's alright, the both of you. I'll pull some strings here and there and make sure, (Y/N) gets her gun back, alright? Easy peasy!" Dazai lightened the mood up a little.

"Sigh, thank you, Dazai. For making this easier for all of us," Kunikida said before excusing himself, saying that he needs to fill out a few more forms at the police station and make sure that neither Dazai or (Y/N) get accused for anything that they didn't do.

Dazai proceeded to lead (Y/N) back to their little home as the auntie and her daughter were led to the second ambulance by the new paramedics.

(Y/N) leaned into Dazai as she curled up onto him. He held her close and tight, knowing full well that she was shaken up from the encounter.

"Osamu... Remember how you always asked for the truth about my childhood... What you witnessed today that was happening to that auntie and her daughter? That's the real truth to my childhood.

But no one saved us. And as I grew and my dad lived his other life with his little affair, he would come and go to let off steam on my mother and my mother started to blame me for how miserable our lives were.

That's why I never had a past occupation like everyone else. I had been working with the ADA ever since I was 18 and I ran away from her.

The president helped me. He helped my mother by providing her safety and a new home.

My father is still out there, somewhere with that other woman.

And I... I've never seen my mother since the day I ran away. She must be happier now," (Y/N) said, tears streaming down her cheeks.

Dazai hugged her closer and kissed her forehead.

"It's alright, love. You have me and the other ADA members for you as well now. Hell, even the Port Mafia is with you right now after how much you helped them out when we were all having trouble with The Guild and Fyodor. You have all of us here for you.

Most importantly, my love, you have me. I won't let anyone so much as hurt you even a little bit and go off the hook.

I swear," Dazai murmured softly into her ear and she snuggled closer to him, their feets touching and their hands interwined with each other's.

____________________________________

"Port Mafia strikes again as a man who was arrested yesterday due to commiting domestic violence was murdered by them brutally in his own jail cell much to the surprise of all the police officers present.

Police officers were considering requesting the Armed Detective Agency to further an investigation at first, but has now decided against it as the chief of the police station has deemed it as a waste since the man was a criminal," the news reporter announced on the morning news as (Y/N) sipped her (bitter/sweet/neutral) (coffee/tea) and Dazai adorable chewed his crab sandwich.

"Who did you ask to do it?" (Y/N) asked immediately as soon as Dazai swallowed.

"Chuuya was more than willing after I told him the story. I didn't even have to tell him which police station and cell that scum was in, he ran off and figured it all out himself and finished the job," Dazai answered before continuing to adorably eat his crab sandwich.

"That scum deserved it," (Y/N) agreed as she continue sipping her (coffee/tea).

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Awareness Note:

Stop domestic violence. The pain lingers on even after the relationship has ended. No one should have to be bounded to a spouse that only views them as an object and an inferior instead of a human being and an equal. No one has to go through physical and mental pain with a monster that prefers to take control of everything. No one has to go through such pain.

Marriage isn't pain! Marriage is a bond of two people who love each other!

If it hurts both physically and mentally, then it's not love.

Know the difference.

#stopdomesticviolence #dazai osamu #bsd dazai #bungou stray dogs #dazai osamu x reader #dazai x y/n #dazai x you #dazaibsd #dazai oneshot #dazai x reader #dazai x reader fluff #comfort

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siriuslyshewrote · 3 years

Text

Beautiful Boy - James Potter

A/N: aptly titled because yes, we all believe that James Potter is the most beautiful boy.

Requested? : yes

Word Count : 1.3k

Summary : James Potter fluff. What else could we possibly want?

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry was something that could never be described as dull. Every moment spent in it was a blur of heightened emotions, whether they be good and bad, and there was never a day that went by without chaos. In comparison, your summers were positively dull.

As much as you loved the castle, you loved the people even more, your housemates and classmates, in particularly the close circle of friends you had woven together over your seven years in Hogwarts. Lily , Mary and Marlene took precedent as your closest girl friends, the ones with which every night in the dormitories was a sleepover, toasting your feet agains the little log burner, listening to the latest muggle records, and laughing your heads off. Sirius and Remus and Peter were brilliant boys, and you loved them deeply, too. James always said you loved too deeply.

It was he that you loved the most, that messy haired bespectacled boy with the crooked , previously broken nose and lopsided grin. With his warm hands and suffocating hugs and intoxicating presence. James knew you more than anyone, and had been a constant in your life since the two of you were tiny children, growing up living on the same street. He above anyone knew each one of your deepest and darkest secrets, your most mortifying memories, and embarrassing crushes. All but one, of course.

The crackling embers of the fire, and the quiet, exhausted chatter of the group around you soothed you, as you finally gave up on your Transfiguration essay, and dropped both it and your quill onto one of the many rugs that littered the floor of the common room. Music, from someone or others record player, played Bowie in the background.

"Tired?"

James grinned from beside you, his head lolling on the back of the sofa. He, too, had given up on his essay, by this time. You had no idea how he wasn't asleep already - he got up at the crack of dawn every single morning to play Quidditch, and still had the exuberant energy of a golden retriever.

You nodded , barely suppressing a yawn as you stretched out on the sofa the both of you were sharing, laying your head into his lap, wearily watching the animated conversation between Marlene and Sirius about something or other. Knowing Sirius and Marlene, she was trying to point out the flaws in another one of his crazily thought out schemes. Remus, too, was watching the pair with a secret smile upon his face - his eyes straying more to Sirius than anyone else, over the top of his book.

Mary was already asleep, curled up in a velvet armchair like a cat, her limbs tucked underneath her as she snored gently.

Your eyelashes drooped, brushing against your cheek, as your eyes closed against your protest. N.E.W.T's, you had very quickly discovered during your first few week back at school for seventh year, were living up to their name this year. They truly were exhausting.

Fingers combed through your hair, with a gentle clumsiness that you would recognise even if your head was currently not in his lap.

"What're you doing?" You mumbled sleepily, too tired to open your eyes, poking at his knee with your finger.

"Stop fussing. I'm just braiding your hair." He whispered, continuing with his mission.

You hoped that he was too concerned with your hair to see the smile that tugged on your lips at his words. James often devised these projects, randomly wanting to learn to do things until he achieved his goal. You had become his subject over the past few weeks as he attempted to learn how to braid, and had, several times walked back into the dormitory to the girls cackles at your newest hairstyle. James had the energy and will to do anything he wanted ... though perhaps styling hair was not his vocation. Really, Lily had told you, you only needed to look at his own hair to see that.

You didn't mind his newest project, and as you let him braid your hair by the fireplace, you desperately tried to pretend that it wasn't because him being so close made your heart beat a fierce drum against your ribs.

After a few minutes of quiet between the two of you, there was a lull in the conversation that you noticed even with your eyes closed in half sleep.

"Merlin, Prongs, could you be any more obvious?" Sirius' voice came from near the fire, a grin in his tone.

James fingers continued their work in your hair as he talked back to his friend.

"What?"

"That you are completely enamoured with our deer Y/N?" Even without looking at him, you could tell that Sirius was very pleased with his very much overused pun.

James tensed. Your breathing quickened slightly, though you didn't open your eyes.

Secretly, you wanted to hear what he would say.

"Piss off, Pads." He mumbled.

"It is quite obvious." Lily added in.

"Just a bit." Remus bit back the grin in his voice at his friends obvious discomfort.

"For fucks sake, guys!" James hissed quietly, clearly under the impression that you were asleep. "We are not dating."

"If you grew some balls, you would be." Sirius spoke, with murmurs of agreement from the others, apart from Mary, who you could still hear snoring.

James was quiet, for a moment.

"You'll have to tell her at some point, before someone else does." Lily spoke wisely. "Her and Amos are getting rather close, don't you think?"

James let out a scoff that was both a little defensive and a little bit worried.

"Y/N would never date that Hufflepuff."

"So you do admit that you like her?" Lily said triumphantly.

"Love her, more like." Sirius chipped in.

James' fingers were weaving once again in your hair, though perhaps a little bit less gentle than before.

"Just leave it." His tone indicated that he no longer wanted to discuss it, and the rest of the Gryffindor's clearly picked upon the tense tone he had adopted, because the conversation shifted quickly after that.

Though you desperately wanted to mull over what had just been said, you felt the pull of sleep drag you into unconsciousness. ————— "Love."

A gentle voice awoke you, with a slight shake of your shoulders. Blearily, you blinked, opening your eyes to the Common Room, which was much lighter than it had been when you closed your eyes. The fire had died in the fireplace, leaving only a few embers behind.

"Mmm?" You replied, rubbing sleep out of your eyes. You realised that you were still lying in James' lap, and a small flush crept up your cheeks.

"I've got to go to Quidditch practice. We’ve got the match this morning.” He said quietly, giving you a sorry look.

"Have you slept down here all night?" You questioned, sitting up and stretching, feeling your bones pop and crack after your slightly uncomfortable sleeping position.

He shrugged, standing up with a stretch, his jumper pulling up and exposing a sliver of his tanned stomach. He ruffled his hair, trying to rid his bed head.

"You were asleep. I couldn't wake you, you'd probably kill me." A ghost of a grin flickered onto his face.

"Sorry." You yawned, holding out a hand for him to pull your off the sofa. He obliged.

"I've really gotta go." He said regretfully, brushing his lips against your forehead in a typical James gesture.

"Love you, Prongsie." You spoke sleepily, making to go up the stairs of your dorm to get a few hours more sleep.

"Yeah... Love you too." His speech sounded almost painful to him, but you were too tired to register it.

In fact, you were too tired to even remember the conversation you had heard the previous night until you reached the top of the stairs, and by that time, James was gone.

#James potter #James Potter x reader #James Potter imagine #James potter fanfiction #James potter fanfic #James Potter oneshot #maruaders #marauders era #marauders imagine #marauders era imagine #marauders x reader #marauders x y/n #marauders x you #Harry Potter imagine #Harry Potter imagines #Harry Potter fanfiction #Harry Potter fandom

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mariasabanahabanabana · 2 years

Text

Our first time - Chapter 2

A/N: Ok, before I start, I would like to say that this and the other fics in progress, were written before everything that happened at the last Academy Awards, so they don't reflect, defend or take any side in what happened at the last Oscars.

Even when this fic is a bit personal, so much so that it could be considered a letter to destiny and to a certain way a manifestation, I don't stand for the ideals, norms, conducts of the Academy. (of which I am knowledgeable)

So, all that said, let's get started…. That's right, continuing. Yeah, it's been almost a month or two, but, but, but, but, still with this in mind, I wanted to post it and not leave it half done, besides, I told you, I told you Razita, "this is going to be a saga/series of fics/one shot/shots". Said and done, here is the second part.

PS: There will be certain references to "In the heights". It doesn't matter, but, but, in case you can see any similarities, know why.

I really hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it and well, without having anything else to say, here is the continuation

Pairing: Simu Liu x Cuba/mexican!reader

Summary: It's your first time...

At the Oscars/Oscar's (reblog/like/share if you thought I was talking about something else)

Warnings: It may not be as long as the last and with possible spelling errors due to the rush and hours I am writing/editing this, so if I have missed something, let me know in the comments

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ONE MONTH LATER

March 8, 2022

Time: 07:30 am

Location: L.A California

Pronto llegará

el dia de mi suerte

sé que antes de mi muerte

Seguro que mi suerte cambiará

Without knowing how or when, you began to hum that verse that you had repeated over and over again and made sure you believed it and now, with the passing of the years, it took on greater weight.

Who would have thought that time and life itself together could take so many unexpected turns and not only with the aim of bringing destruction, sadness, despair, and pain to your existence, who would have thought?

The gap between past and present/future was so appreciable, you could swear that the (T/N) of a few years ago after was a complete stranger to you, you just didn't recognize her. And no, not because you didn't want to, on the contrary, what you were at the time is the basis of what you had become today, but you really weren't the same.

Even accepting, reflecting, embracing, and letting go of what did and did not serve you, it was undeniable that you still had moments of revelation, moments where you realized your present, moments in which the surprise of the rapid passing of time was the same that you experienced every Christmas Eve before the arrival of “Santa Claus”.

Your life had changed so much, to the point that if your adult version, the one of today, the one who is living at the moment, in the here and now, in the present, had the opportunity to travel to the past and tell a younger version of you what life would bring, it is very certain that that little person would suffer an attack of euphoria for so much information and emotion to digest, especially if he/she found out that you were a month away from having received the best news of your life and having the experience you had dreamed of on more than one occasion.

Even though you had overly ambitious goals and objectives, you constantly reminded yourself of the many possibilities you could end up with, so finding yourself where you're today was not entirely in your plans.

For the same reason, the feeling of pride that you had been living with since that day had not left you at any moment.

And no, your feeling wasn't only for what you were finally achieving, I mean, of course, because this was your biggest dream, the love of your life, but also had a lot to do with being nominated, because even if you didn't admit it out loud, been nominated for or win an Oscar it was always one of your many dreams to fulfill, and you were finally close to making it come true.

No matter if you won or not, the fact of being nominated was already a dream come true.

And it looks like you weren't the only one that life was giving the best face, since after taping for almost 5 hours continuously, they gave you a break, so using your free time you checked your mobile, you found out that your beau will be a host. You called him as soon as possible, without waiting for a second or thinking twice about it.

One ring

Two rings

three rings

After three rings, you realized that probably, perhaps, calling him in the middle of shooting time hadn't been your smartest idea.

Just feeling like a complete idiot for the impulsive reaction, you mentally debated whether you should hang up or wait until the voicemail rang, when suddenly

"Gorgeous..." You spoke first.

Jeez, it was amazing how despite the days, weeks, months, years, hardships, time zone differences, stress, and other inconveniences you two still managed to keep the spark between the two you. A perfect example, of this one, is the typical gag you used to give each other every time you talked on the phone.

"Linda..." He continued.

"What happened Babe?"

"Did you hear about it...?

"Yeah, they just called me, actually I was planning to call you, but you apparently beat me to it."

"Cariño, how sorry I'm. But you know what, if you want I can hang up, pretend I didn't I hear anything, so then you can call me, and we can have this conversation again, with the difference of you telling me " Sweetheart, guess what....".

If there was something incredible between the two of you and the love you overflowed, it was that despite being so far away from each other, both of you were, or in this case, you were, capable of picture and visually imagining every detail of his face as he denied himself funny about the situation.

"Really?" He asked, unable to believe that you would actually do this.

"Claro."

"Alright, I'd love that."

"Okay, I'll hang up on you."

And just as you proposed, Simu calls you back.

"Gorgeous." And there they went again.

"Lindo."

When you proposed, you both could be a couple of lovelorn goofballs.

“Tell me something i dont know" You tell

" Hon, can't you believe what's happened?

Oh boy, here it comes

"Let's see... tell me something I don't know."

"I gotta be a presenter at the Oscars."

"No me diga..." You take a second before continuing with your felicitations.

"Mi Vida I don't know what to tell you, cause I think I have already told you before, however, I would never get tired and will never get tired of telling you how proud and happy I feel for you. Congratulations for this great news, truly, muchas felicidades, I feel so proud and happy for you..."

"Awws, my life, stop it... I will cry, and I don't think the make-up team likes to start from zero."

And between laughs, honeyed nicknames, and after a while, which felt like just seconds, you both had to say goodbye, but not before, once again felicitating him for his great achievement.

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Glossary

Pronto llegará - It will arrive soon

El día de mi suerte - My lucky day

Sé que antes de mi muerte - I know that before my death

Seguro que mi suerte cambiará - I'm sure my luck will change

Cariño - Honey

Claro - off course

Lindo /linda -pretty or gorgeous

Mi vida - my life

No me diga - don't tell me

Felicidades - congratulations

#y despues de fuuuuuuull tiempo...#the bitch is back #como siempre llegando tarde #pero con estilacho #oscars 2022 #the academy awards #awards and prizes #simu liu #simu liu fanfiction #simu liu imagine #simu liu oneshot #simu liu x reader #simu liu x y/n #simu liu x you #simu x reader #simu+liu #Simu Liu

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sanghyukstattoos · 3 years

Text

City of Major

Summary: Major Yoo Taeyang makes every excuse he can to see you, he likes you but unknowingly, he has also fallen into a plan intricately crafted by you and Captain Kim Youngkyun

Genre: Mystery au? [Warnings: descriptions of anxiety (fear of death; recurrent traumatic memories and cues for them to resurface whether verbal or situational; repulsion towards an individual concerning sex + the individual's involvement in a sexual crime but not the principle offender), mentions of guns, death (murder and death of another team, many witnesses), sexual assault (also referred to as rape) and physical assault (refers to the physical assault as a punishment, implications of reinforcing hierarchy in a derogatory manner) references to being dispatched in the military, result of civil wars/indirect reference to poverty]; Fluff-flu; smut (so brief that if you blink, you'll miss it)

Characters: Yoo Taeyang x reader x Hwiyoung I Kim Youngkyun

A/N: None of the images in the collage are mine, refer to here for more; For more SF9, read here, for iKON, read here and for optional bias writings, read here

As he steps outside the building and slips past the guard, the cool air becomes his. He adorns a striped shirt with subtle colours so that he does not stand out particularly in the dark, except for the occasional illumination by the streetlights over- head. His steps are light, careful not to alert the two people ahead, in this case, he makes sure to tread lightly. One eye is out on his surroundings, for stray animals or motorbikes. A third carefully watches him from the back, smiling at the unknown.

There's nothing in sight, at least for the next metre or so. Youngkyun's first time following a pair just so happens to be the two of you. One of the two is Major Yoo Taeyang, not forever defined by his numerous accomplishments but by his dutiful services to the military. The second of the two is you, never sought-after despite your unlawfulness, but penned by your achievements towards the community.

Now that Youngkyun's been drafted to this base- coincidental occurrences, not anything that either he or the Major would wish for, he can tell the truth. Some people will believe him like the higher-ups who have let their doubts about the Major's reports fester for months but wave at him when they see him. Ruthless killer. Others will doubt but come around. There's nothing Youngkyun can do now, but sit and wait on his pot of gold.

For every moment that he remains in the proximity of a place that worships an individual such as the Major, Youngkyun is reminded, very frequently of what he had to undergo whilst he was taking orders from him. He's close when you and the Major pause, right in the middle of the street as if you have done this many times before, automatically, with no fear of being interrupted. Then again, it is the place itself. It is deserted for miles with boundless high-rise buildings. Youngkyun slips into a dark corner, watching you from there. It's the side entrance to one of the buildings, two staircases to navigate in the dark.

Your safety has been on his mind since the first time you've been involved, with him, in this plan. Except him, everyone is in the right place. He is supposed to be in bed, snoring to the lull of soothing dreams. But when he remembered what was occurring today, his eyes snapped open with a blurry view of his ceiling. Half asleep and just like that, he got out of his bed and dressed in a hurry, not bothering to question the rationality of his actions.

His eyes squint to make out the figures, looking away when they meet, connecting their lips in the dark of the night. They pull apart and exchange something, most likely words of affirmation. Guiltily, he begins to move when they do. He pulls back, slithering back into the unlit corner. Further down, away from the figures, close to Youngkyun, he sees an automatic light perk on from the corner of his eyes. There are no alleyways either. So, there is someone else behind him.

Youngkyun sighs, he can't move unless whoever's following him does. He looks both ways, making sure that he doesn't lose the direction you headed in or get caught in a two-way intersection with the person behind him. Ahead is an alleyway, narrow and enclosed by two large green bins with black tops. Youngkyun makes a run for them. He looks behind as he runs, twice turning his head in caution before slipping into the small space.

He sighs when he gets there, he's locked. The bins are against the wall and he's standing in between them. It feels like he's floating, an obvious interpretation because although little light catches his figure, anybody could see him. 'I'm not great at this'., he thinks, racking his head for a solution. The figures now disappear out of sight. Not being able to crouch or look past the wall, he turns his attention to the figure that was following him.

You've left, he sighs. He also takes two steps back, quickly, out of extreme caution, instinctively raising his hands. A figure clutches the gun with both their hands, pointing it at his face. Their posture is relaxed, far from the average- not bent at the knees or directing a glare at Youngkyun. There's real fear that fills his system, freezing his legs to the ground and hands at the side, unable to reach for his gun. A hand pats his trousers and it's taken away.

The fear is much more prominent now, clutching Youngkyun's throat, squeezing it. It's more of a tug than a squeeze. A figure, enshrouded in black emerges from behind, swaying a little as it makes its way to oblivious Youngkyun. It presses into the tufts of his hair and touches the scalp. ''Don't move'' a scruffy voice says from behind him, walking to the front where Youngkyun can see him. The figure that made himself apparent never leaves his gun's aim on Youngkyun’s tummy when he clamours Youngkyun's pockets for any weapons that he may be carrying.

Youngkyun's throat runs dry and his fingers begin to tremble. He looks at the figure in front, not tearing his eyes off him. They finish, chuckling as they pocket his weaponry, only weaponry.

The one on the left has black hair, brown eyes, and wears a skin tight shirt, made from the material of gym clothes along with cargo trousers. Youngkyun knows who he is, by face not by personality. He tailed Youngkyun and his group- peeking from behind buildings, on foot rather than in a car. Everybody wanted to see the husband of an undercover cop that day. They have contacts everywhere, from the owner of the restaurant in the building to the guard sitting inside, payment to the gang in the area perhaps.

Youngkyun can take the two but is outnumbered by weapons. The figure on the right is unknown to him. His dark circles are prominent, uniform worn-out, maybe from a recent mission. Youngkyun had heard of it but they could not track them. 'Or maybe that isn't it', Youngkyun thinks. The figure is bulky and imposes his presence by towering over Youngkyun's one point seven nine metre frame. He has a scar on his chest, a diagonal line, peeking out from his shirt and an unshaven beard.

''Come with us, our-'' the one on the left speaks.

''Why'd you search me?'', Youngkyun asks.

''Formality. Our boss wishes to speak to you, over.. certain misunderstandings.''

''What misunderstandings?''

''Over Major Yoo Taeyang's report, from the next state over.'' he said, whispering the last bit.

''I can't give you that information, details are confidential.'' Youngkyun says, pushing the most terrible of memories away. They came first.

''You murdered that reporter didn't you?'' he says, predetermined, rehearsed, as if he knew that they would come to this point.

Youngkyun feels a slight chill run through his hands in the warm, damp air of the night. Sweat clouds his back, staining his top in various places. He feels cold, his blood freezing. They sound so convinced about it.

''Come on, soldier'' the one on the right impatiently grabs Youngkyun's hand, hustling him forward. He's stopped by the one on the left.

Pulling his hand from the bulky man's grasp, Youngkyun states, ''You have some misunderstandings as well. That man is dead not because of me.''

The man makes a face as if he has heard everything he needs to. ''You have all the reason in the world to deny it. Let's go.'' he says.

The gun pointed at his torso, an easy angle to just pull the trigger is only out of sight when Youngkyun sits in the car. It's classy, a contrast to the two men.

They are efficient but not by much of the standard. From hasty steps behind him to the accidental flickering of the light, everything was predictable, save for the man hiding in the pitch black of the alley. Neither of them caught him flinching then.

''You'll meet her.'' the driver says, he was the one on the left of medium height and novice, almost- professional with this new experience. Youngkyun jumps at the word her. The driver chuckles, ''Slow down, she's not enthusiastic to see you.''.

The bulky man sitting next to him speaks up, ''Just a formality.''.

Youngkyun repeats the words, staring out of the window.

The driver drops the passengers off outside a dark blue building, decorated with luxurious apartments. A ground floor apartment's lights are on and people are moving about, happily dancing and giggling to music that can be heard by Youngkyun and the ruffian man.

The two pause to stare at the scene, Youngkyun is unimpressed, motivated by other feelings but the other guy is in mock awe. They press on, the guy says nothing all the way up the three flights of stairs. They pass by an elevator each time but make no move to use it. Easier to run away if they were being shot at.

You sit in the apartment, taking in a deep, good breath after hastily preparing for Youngkyun's arrival. Youngkyun knew you way before you were indoctrinated into your family's business. You were stubborn, righteous and had a few sets of rules that you lived by, no matter what. You were also justice-loving, ironic given that your family's business wasn't selling groceries or something, it was one of gangs in the area.

Youngkyun knew that Yoo Taeyang wanted to use your family. But that's as far as he knew. It was only half the story. If you were not going to use Taeyang back, you would not hesitate to shoot him. You wouldn't kill him to honour one of your principles. That did not mean that you wouldn't harm him towards the point of death.

You proved yourself with all the experience your family could provide you with. You knew that Taeyang was climbing up ranks in his head and trying to make it reality too, by buying off your family. It went from little stocks in the business to sleeping with you, every time he had a day off. He wasn't a bad guy either, just a little narcissist with twisted values from his father.

He insisted that he had good intentions. But people committed the worst crimes in humanity with their good intentions.

The figure nodded to you, leaving Youngkyun at the door. Youngkyun was relieved to see you but that went away quite quickly. Much more was what you were wearing, night clothes. Lace loose at the shoulders fell shortly below your buttocks, another strip tied around your waist. You left the door open and turned to the living room.

He shut the door behind him, locking it, taking his shoes off and admiring the open space. There was very little in the middle except for an antique glass table on a large, comfortable rug. Plush red sofas with jewels embedded in the handles stood out against the wall, two tall glass cupboards filled with ornaments and foreign gifts from around the world were placed in the corners.

You sat on one side of the glass table with your back against the sofas while Youngkyun took the opposite, crossing his legs and placing his hands firmly on his knees. His breath stopped short when you raised your arms to remove your hair tie, letting hair fall all over your shoulders.

You noticed his eyes following your movements. You chuckled, ''What do I have for you? Is that your question.''

''Uh-yes, yes it is.'', he says, clearing his throat.

You chuckle, wondering why this nervous behaviour of his. ''Is your behaviour flighty because of those men?'', you question.

''Yes you should stop doing that. It scares me every time.'' he says, with more confidence, leaning on his palms.

''I'm sorry, maybe next time.'', you say, carefully taking into account his anxiety. ''You weren't supposed to be there today.'' you continue.

Why were you there? is the question.

''I've made my mind up. The recording? Push the date up further, today. I'll do it today.'' Youngkyun almost rambles on. He'll kill two birds with one stone today.

''You don't-'' you start. He really doesn't have to. He should take his time and prepare.

''I have to, you should now. The full story.''

You sigh, ''come with me.'', standing up and walking in the direction of your room.

Youngkyun walks past you to inspect the room, purely out of instinct. You motion with your hand and tell him to do as he pleases before he turns to you and apologises. He had this right. A surge of anxiousness overcomes him, for many reasons.

Youngkyun had been with you before and you had been there, to see him break multiple laws. Him. You were a middle ground, neither here nor there or a grey area between your rival gang and the police. You knew snippets of what Youngkyun had been through on his missions under Yoo Taeyang. You needed to hear the full perspective from him. From someone who had observed and been through it all.

Youngkyun knows that you want to help him. Nothing of semblance to push his anxiety further down the edge, like hidden cameras or audio equipment, the newest probably hidden somewhere, in something easy to look over like an ornament.

You had no ornaments in the room, except for the paintings. Painted by you, having taken over hours and hours to complete, to reach that stage of luxury. Taking a seat to calm his spinning head, he faintly clutches the rich covers underneath. They give him warmth, which he doesn't need in this weather and the urge to fall asleep on them.

You haven't moved from your place behind him, watching him search the place with inquisitive, trained eyes, meant to detect things. ''It's safe here'' you are soft about it, trying to encourage him, coax it out of him.

''He will go to jail.'', he says after a pause.

''Evidence?'', it can't be circumstantial.

''Eyewitness testimony.''

''Who?''. He is one of the witnesses.

''Can't say now.'', protecting them.

''What did he do?''. Another way of asking, How did he do it? Earn his rank plus the commendation of his seniors?

You sit next to him, holding a recorder in your hand, urging him to say it again as you begin. ''Major Yoo was the one who sent those soldiers to stop the raid of a gang on the resources held at another base. They expected them to be armed but they did not expect them to know that they were coming.''

''Where was this?''

''Past the front entrance of South Central, two blocks down.''. It didn't mean anything to you.

''Did he give those orders himself?''

''That he did.'', a preamble to all of Taeyang's troubles.

''What happened to those soldiers, Captain?''

''They died, we have reason to believe that they were ambushed. A reporter working in the area colluded with the gang, soldiers- ten individuals sent there to stop the attack on a high status official. Presumably a raid on the base's resources, had tons of it all stacked and going nowhere, not to the hungry people in the village. Major must have not known, none of them made it back because of the information he had shared with the reporter. The failure was the result of planning irresponsibly.''

''How?''

''He must have changed his report when he realised his mistake. They noticed so many people missing and investigations were open for quite some time. But Taeyang's elaborate, smart as hell, first reason he got that position, that and his capabilities in the field, calm and composed. He reported it differently, worded it in a way that allowed him to evade responsibility. It was premature, they didn't have enough information to go in in the first place but they were still sent.''.

Easier to control his wrong-doings from there, once you are high in status, people will come for you. Being high-status is also the fastest way to lose your job, if you aren't careful, you think. It is one of the cautions you are aware of as a leader.

''He's done it before.''. Youngkyun thinks. He isn't actively working on this case. They need a draft, someone to summarise it up. Surely they have asked other members of Youngkyun's team to do the same. Investigations into the Major have been conducted for sometime now. It is only now that they made themselves apparent.

''Done what?''. The closer you get to the truth, the harder it is to ask him questions. Especially given the fact that you were new to this. You didn't know what questions to ask. You wish he would just tell you everything, straight up.

''Frame someone else for his mistakes, must give him immense anxiety.''

''Anything is relevant right now.''.

''When I was under his orders, he made the mistake of replacing a code book. Going out would make it look like our country was in a pretence to the other, they had a contract or something. It was burned when we got it back, he was let off, save for his assistant.'', he clenched his teeth about. You knew about this.

''Pinned it on him?''

''I don't even know if that's possible. He had officials gloss over their reports, to cover for him because of what they believe he can achieve. To escape like that, he murdered once and he'll do it again, trust me.''

''Murder?''. You held back any visible frustrations now. Pushing him would gain nothing. ''Anything else?''

''He let go of a man from the same place as where the soldiers were killed. Committed sexual assault and homicide but Major let go of him.''

''Why is that Captain?'', you said, horrified, already unsettled, finicky, nervous at the hair tips.

''The man was protected by the gang- high in status, high enough for them to intervene and protect a life. Major could not start a war so he cut a deal, 'let go of the village and they'll release him'. All went well.''. Ironic for them to protect a life. Could it hint that there were discrepancies in the leadership?, you ask yourself but don't say anything about it.

''It's not out jurisdiction if the individual is not from here.''

''oh, but she is, was, the head of the resistance group, dual-nationality.''

''That's a lot of things to tie him for.'' you murmur, sighing at the boat-load of information.

''Tie him?'' he asks, curious. Are you considering punishing the Major by the law?, he thinks. You always did say that the law moves slower than it should.

There is no answer from you. You want to deny his question that you know he is currently asking. You could give it a try, again.

''Why were the resources held up?'', you continue.

''Take control of the resources y/n, take control of the village. Probably used it as leverage but not sure what. They don't have a lot to offer but the gang does, information on other gangs. Taking other's out would risk them gaining more power and we couldn't have that.''

''You think Taeyang has something to do with this?''

''He doesn't run the tide on that, his friend does, childhood friend. But you can't assume that she's going to help him, I know her and she wouldn't. She's got a mole in camp.''

''We'll have to come back to that.''. Human nature. It isn't even in your intention to come back to this topic. You want to know.

''I'll find out about it.''. It's a place to start, to wrap the mission up in bow tie and send it off.

''Don't get yourself into danger.'', you say, genuine about it and eager to prove him wrong. He thinks that you could care less about him. The like has always been there.

He nods, resting his head in his palms, elbows digging into his thighs. He takes your advice to heart. At this moment, he finds it harder than ever to separate you in his world from his profession. He wants you but how does he tell you about it?

''If you knew and you yourself did not die- were there groups?''

''Three, back up and because the villages are huge too. More soldiers means that work can be carried out in a time efficient manner. I wasn't in their group, one day- a day after the first four weeks were over they came and told us. They relayed the news, ''They're dead''. It was so professional, they answered the how's. It hurt y/n, it hurt all over. I wasn't in the same group as them but I ate with them, joked with them, worked with them outside of our team, together. We are one team less, y/n, one team less. That was a lot for us to think about, compartmentalise but we didn't have enough time to do it. We ended up covering for them, breaking our backs, taking orders while some bullshit went on in the background.'' Youngkyun ends it frustrated, referring to the rape and the injustice that that man was let go. Tears rim his eyes, he clenches his fists at the thoughts, recounting those painful memories.

You grasp his hand, soothingly running your finger over the clenched skin, waiting for him to relax before you pull yourself closer and take him into your arms. He tries his best not to cry right there. He lets go of his tense posture and snuggles into the warmth you have to offer which you take as a good sign.

You find yourself unhappy for him, pained rather. That he holds all of that, in there, this sensitive guy with un-coped, heavy amounts of emotional trauma at the back of his head. You feel for him. You run your fingers through his hair and kiss the side of his head, letting him go to sit up straight.

You want to say something but nothing is to be said. Words are meaningless right now. You sit in silence for some time, enduring the harsh humidity that makes your skin dry, waiting for him to snap out of it- everything, when he is ready.

'Let's go!'' Sanghyuk would have said, pulling Major Yoo towards the restaurant to ease the awkwardness they felt with him. Lee Sanghyuk was one of the few soldiers killed in the blast of gang members and weapons. Taeyang tries his best not to think about it. Better profile for lying, he thinks.

He walks alone to meet a different correspondent. The staff politely greet him but turn their heads down and ignore him. Perhaps they have heard the nasty rumours about him. He finds you sitting on the far side, right in the corner, wedged in a seat for two and he smiles brightly. He can't tell if he really likes you or not, lines are beginning to blur. Some things are just not part of the plan.

He greets you, wrapping his arms around you in a loving embrace. ''You visited! Is this your first time at the base?'', he asks. You like to think that he's put a lot of effort into this relationship. Sometimes you like to think that he sits on his bed at night, runs over the conversations he's had with you and picks apart little details. You find it humorous. But it's a real possibility.

He loves your lips, especially when they touch his skin. He lingers over yours, pressing softly, feeling you for the first time this afternoon. Your hand curiously travels his uniform when he pecks your cheeks, your neck. You know where this is going.

He swoops in for your lips, taking you by surprise. Again?, he thinks. Delectably, he wonders why. He thinks of nothing; his groin stirs. ''Do you want me to show you around? Or go home?'' he whispers.

Your coffee, not touched at all, full to the hilt, is left there. It's a short walk to your car. He tugs you along, looking back and smiling, very obviously excited. The next question is car or home? He walks faster than normal, something callous is on his mind.

Pretence or not, in this relationship, the both of you want something out of it. His motive is far more clearer than yours. That's what Youngkyun had also asked you, ''What'd you want out of this thing, with him?''. It was hard to explain. You wanted almost nothing and you were not stuck so why were you here?

He takes you home, yours more specifically. It's in the same building as the apartment that Youngkyun had visited but a couple of floors away. If he was to find you, he would look in the wrong place, not ever knowing that you were nearby. In the elevator, upwards, he firmly clutches your waist. You try to squirm out of his gasp. It's the moment of truth. About the man that he let away, it comes to mind and you are repulsed.

You feel the need to get away from him. He's behind, slipping his arms around your waist, feeling your tummy, pressing kisses of air at your neck and you can't take it. You endure it all the way up, occasionally cracking a smile, hoping he's not going to ask about the gloom on your face on the ride up. You'll answer his questions, but not his arguments.

The doors open, without a hitch or some noise, closing away when you step into the extra bright sunshine that decorates the hallway floor and it's walls. Your mood is ruined but his? Strong and going on. He tugs you to your apartment, flashing back a smile which credit is due, momentarily makes you smile. The feeling his smile evokes is temporary, replaced by visual flashes of what he must have done.

You push them away, cautious enough on your feet to alert yourself of what he has done. You have distance because you never saw it with your own eyes. They were not your family members, nor your friends or distant relatives. You have to hand him over to Captain Kim but not whilst torturing yourself in the process.

''Let's go'' he says in a genuine tone of voice. You are surprised and have to remind yourself. Anticipation builds up, creeps into your skin with goose-bumps or tiny tremors, maybe only tiny to you. You chuckle and throw a smile that you hope looks like one, entering your apartment. ''The chapter can close here if you want too'' Youngkyun had asked you, out of concern for your well-being. He had told you what he had to, the same disgustingly gruesome but life-changing details as on the night the two of you had recorded it.

It would be given to them, the team consisting of high-ranking members, higher than the Major, someone that Youngkyun and his team know and trust, enough to find something in their investigative line into Taeyang's immoral doings. Youngkyun knows that he can't hide it anymore. He will be punished for holding back information. However, you will always admire his efforts to save his team and pull through, even when under the harsh gaze of secrecy that threatened to break their backs.

Taeyang doesn't miss the shadow of the figure sitting on the sofa as you kick off your shoes and enter the apartment. He's not shaken, just walking in like you'd walk into a store or something, curious. That is all. Kyun has confidence, the one that had been previously broken down. That estimation of how far in the future Taeyang will be behind bars as opposed to the confidence in Taeyang which he has none of.

Taeyang looks back, not as menacing as the manner in which you thought he would appear. He smiles. Like a knowing kind of smile. It makes your shiver from behind the counter. Kyun is closer to Taeyang than Taeyang is to you. Kyun could reach over the table if he attempted something. It could turn into a fight and he would be off with you- for negotiation or worse, since neither of them had weapons.

Which is why you choose the kitchen. It's open, giving you a view of both of them and contains all the objects you can turn into weapons in one place. It's also close to the front door. You could reach it in a couple of steps. If you ran fast enough. Taeyang is silently thinking as he pulls a chair and seats it opposite Youngkyun with only the barrier of the coffee table in between.

Taeyang smiles. You can see the curve of his cheekbones rise, even from behind him. He's not threatened, that's for sure. There is no hint of exasperation present. He moves to say something but doesn't, anything could give him away but none would be enough to implicate him. Some sort of unrivalled anger is provoked within you at that thought.

It's painful to watch this. They stay silent, waiting for the other to speak or maybe they have some unspoken agreement to stay like this. Placing all the weight of your palms on the marble countertop, you shift to the other foot, easing the pain you feel from standing. Youngkyun momentarily leaves his focus from Taeyang to look at you. He sees frustrated eyes but misses the look in Taeyang's.

There's a splodge of anxiety that belittles Taeyang. It nags at him for letting a loose end like Youngkyun onto the base, save for the fact that he has no control over that. Then it is for letting Youngkyun run his mouth. When you are in a position so high, people just wait for a chance to grab you down. He feels furious towards Youngkyun but also understanding. There is conflict. But eventually, the growing resentment wins.

When Youngkyun loses focus, out of concern when he hears you sigh, Taeyang stops thinking. He takes it as a moment of opportunity. It can't save him, but it can make him feel better. Seeping violence in and dismantling his opponent when at their weakest is what he was trained to do. That kind of mindset isn't trained but forced, coerced upon in circumstances of extreme danger and high mortality rate.

It's so fast. So sudden, in fact, too sudden. In your eyes, Taeyang gets up, only half way. His knees are still bent when he leans across the table, not by much. And swings a crack at Youngkyun's face. More specifically his jaw. The area between his ear and chin, not landing completely on the cheek. You don't see Youngkyun wring back.

First is a sound, a groan like the time he had come to you. He was bleeding from a fight, the closest place to come, he had said at the time but now, it is less worse. Your breath hitches. Perhaps you've been holding your breath for so long. You aren't sure. Taeyang could go feral, you aren't sure of that either.

You begin to take a step back. Only a second or two or three later, Youngkyun reels from the shock of being hit. He sits upright, fuming internally, displaying stern patience. His face is almost expressionless, save for the occasional unclenching of the jaw that was hit. He doesn't instantly react, waiting. You don't know what to think.

It’s like a power move, for Taeyang to put Youngkyun in his place before Taeyang would be sent to a worse form of hell, one below dignity for him. Like a punishment, you deserve more than this but this is all I can give you, Taeyang said in other words. Youngkyun reacts instantly when Taeyang gets up with his legs straight and feet tipped in the direction of the door.

He wouldn't run but he could come for you. You had feared it and now, it is about to come true. Youngkyun looks at you as he stands up, telling Taeyang, ''Don't do it.''. Taeyang instead chuckles, disarming Youngkyun, ''I'll walk''. Just then, as Taeyang hits the last syllable, soldiers arrive. Straight through the door. You hadn't heard the lock turning or boots thudding in the hallway.

First sight of them has Taeyang gritting his teeth. He complies, like a mouse in a game of chase. It burns him. He complies, seething at Youngkyun who chuckles. After he leaves, Youngkyun takes a seat, dropping his head into arms. He sighs, partly in relief, partly in the party that had just begun and maybe because, the bigger part of his deal was to keep Taeyang away from you.

You are stuck there. Where you chose to stand and where you are standing now. You try to move, to go to Youngkyun but it feels like Taeyang could burst through the door at any moment. In the face-to-face sense, you didn't know what Taeyang could do. Youngkyun senses it when you don't move. He expects the shuffling of footsteps but not absolute silence.

He gets up, coming to you, reaching for your hand and clasping them together. You hum, looking at him, shifting weight from one foot to the other. You try a smile, failing and then laughing at it which has him smiling too. ''You're okay, he's not coming back. That- what you saw, he can't try anything.'', he softly drops off to your listening ears, reaching to grasp your cheek and like turn-taking, you pull yourself closer to him too. He reaches for you in that moment, connecting your lips to his, softly moulding to yours.

He feels relief in letting you pour out the fear you felt, discarding it away in favour of being in arms. Letting him pick you up and take you to the sofa. Letting you gasp for breath when he lets go, placing you on the sofa with your legs on his thighs. ''I want to help you.'' he says, almost stumbling over his words to try and explain to you that he wants to help, only if you want.

He pauses after his whispers, his lips so close to yours that if you were to give a response, no matter how subtle, he'd know. You mull at his prospect, mind blank, looking like you are thinking. ''Stop asking.'' you say, so soft that it came across as a request, although feeling like a command, one stop sentence. He nods, instantly, absorbing your words, having his breath taken away by how you bring him down on your lips, knotting your fingers through his hair.

''We'll get you out of this gang, this place.'', he murmurs, sitting you down on his lap.

Taeyang could come back, there was a high chance that that event could occur. He was what? The best or second-best rumoured equal to the one in first place? With these people who you called soldiers beguiling you to stay, drawing you till you suffocated, now was the wrong time for Youngkyun's plans of staying with you.

''How? There's no way out, Kyun. They won't be so happy, to drag me back this time.'' you say, sucking in a sharp breath, fiddling with his clothes. He doesn't have a plan, at least not right now. All he wants to do is to get you away from here. Set up life somewhere else, away. The two of you don't have a plan, not yet.

Fervent whimpers leave your lips and desperate fingers clutch tightly at the bedsheets, pleasure overwhelming your sex with the way his cock pulls out and fills you again. He's sweating, core clenching from snapping his hips against yours, absorbing every detail of your body beneath him as you ask him to let you release. The sound of skin slapping and the smell of sex coats the room. Fragrance leaks onto your inner thighs at the end but it doesn't stop him, not from kissing your lips and leaving a trail of heat all the way to your inner thighs, and repeating it, again.

#sf9 #yoo taeyang #hwiyoung #kim youngkyun #sf9 fluff #sf9 writings #sf9 scenarios #sf9 imagines #sf9 smut #sf9 angst #sf9 requests #sf9 fantasy #sf9 fanfic #sf9 x reader

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scfttwice · 3 years

Text

f.a.q.

> in which jina answers and reacts to a few frequently asked questions on vlive.

jina has never really been that active on vlive, especially when it comes to doing solo ones. she knows very well that some of her members, like nayeon, momo, sana, and tzuyu, do them quite often. some surprise onces with a sudden vlive occasionally, like jihyo, dahyun, and chaeyoung. the remaining members, jeongyeon and mina, basically come on vlive once every blue moon. jina would consider herself to be in the same category as jihyo, dahyun, and chaeyoung. don't get her wrong, she loves interacting with her fans, but sometimes schedules get a tad bit too draining, so she can come onto vlive only every so often. it never hurts to pop up in the vlives of the others from time to time, though.

“dahyun-ssi, are you on vlive?” jina asked as she stepped out into the living room of the makane dorm, seeing dahyun sitting at the coffee table with her phone propped up against a potted plant on the table. the older girl pried her eyes away from the thousands of incoming comments on the screen to look at her fellow member. “i am! care to join me?” dahyun invited with a wide smile, jina taking not two seconds to rush across the room and plop down next to dahyun.

she waved to the fans on the other side of the phone screen. “hi, everyone!” she greeted cheerfully, watching as onces spammed the chat to welcome her. she couldn't help but grin at the sight, their fans were always so eager for the girls to do collaborative vlives.

after a moment of looking through the chat section, dahyun read out an english comment. “dahji best girls...ah, thank you, thank you,” she responded also in english, making jina beam with pride. although 'thank you' was such a common and simple phrase, she knew that her unnie's english was improving by the day. “5 tzuyu or 5-year-old tzuyu?” jina read out another comment, giggling softly at the silliness of the question. “i think 5-year-old tzuyu would be cute,” dahyun answered without hesitation and leaned closer towards jina, urging her to give her answer as well. “what about you, jina?”

jina bit the inside of her cheek as she thought it over. “well...5 tzuyu would be fun, but i'll go with 5-year-old tzuyu too. there's only one tzuyu for me,” she answered, but realized too late—only after she had said it—that it sounded much more affectionate than she intended it to. in an instant the vlive comments were flooded by the fans' reactions.

“aww!! tzuna is so cuteee <3”

“TZUNA IS MY OTP”

“tzuna forever wbk”

some of the comments read, making jina slowly shake her head. their fans were really something else. as dahyun laughed in amusement next to her, she thumped her head down onto the table to hide her embarrassment. “i regret coming here,” she muttered with a groan.

“i think that's enough of teasing our maknae,” nayeon remarked as she walked into the room and took a seat on the couch behind the two younger girls. “even though she fully deserves it,” she added quietly, masking it with a cough. “you guys are evil,” jina grumbled, before she lifted her head to shoot a glare in nayeon's way. the oldest member gave her a smile of feigned innocence in return.

the vlive of two became one of three when nayeon joined them. for a while, the girls seemed to have forgotten that they were live, as they got lost in a conversation among themselves. jina was pulled back to their audience when nayeon read out a comment.

“is it one butt or two butts?” the fan asked.

“what a weird question. of course there are two butts,” nayeon answered without much thought, as if it was the most obvious fact known to man. “what? no way,” jina disagreed. “it's one butt, but two butt cheeks.”

nayeon looked at her in disgust, and dahyun couldn't help but laugh as she witnessed the debate between the unnie and the maknae.

“doesn't that just mean it's two butts then?” nayeon disputed.

“no, collectively it's one butt. like how we have one nose but two nostrils,” jina rebutted.

“well what if it's two butts but one butthole?”

“that— that doesn't even make any sense?!”

jina and nayeon's debate went on for a little while more, until jihyo came in to join them. “what's nayeon and jina arguing about now?” she asked dahyun after sitting down on the couch next to nayeon. “the one butt or two butts question,” dahyun answered. “nayeon-unnie is being illogical,” jina complained to jihyo, earning herself a glare from nayeon. “jina is the one who's saying it's one instead of two! what do you think, jihyo?”

jihyo laughed and held both her hands up. “i don't want to be a part of this,” she said dismissively. “how about we just agree to disagree?” dahyun suggested in an attempt to achieve peace. nayeon was the first to comply, crossing her arms over her chest. “fine, but i still think i'm right,” she huffed, and jina stuck her tongue out at her. “ah, it almost feels like we have four maknaes,” jihyo joked.

nayeon left to head back to her own dorm soon after, leaving the three of them to do the vlive. “next comeback spoiler?” jihyo read out a comment. “a spoiler for our next comeback is that it's going to be amazing, so please give it lots of love once it comes out,” jina quickly answered with a proud smile and throwing in a wink at the end, making dahyun and jihyo burst out laughing. “smooth,” jihyo complimented. “but it's true. whatever we release, we worked hard on it with lots of love, so please show us love in return!”

among the comments of dissatisfied fans still wanting a spoiler from the girls, jina found an english comment. “please make a heart,” she read out, before making a heart with her hands. jihyo and dahyun, who had previously busied themselves with a conversation regarding their schedules, saw jina and decided to join in. the two of them held up half a hand heart each and connected them together.

nearing the end of the vlive, jihyo had left, and it was back to being just dahyun and jina. the two were mostly quiet then, just reading the comments from their viewers while one of their song's, like a fool, played on jina's phone in the background, and responding to only certain comments every now and then. jina ignored the ones asking her about her relationship with wayv's lucas—ever since a huge dating rumor about them broke out, it's been difficult for fans to believe that they're only best friends, and jina had grown tired of it at that point.

she also scrolled past any comments that were demanding to see the other members, having had seen too many of them before on her own previous vlive's. she didn't understand why the viewers couldn't just be grateful with whoever it was on the screen, or couldn't just leave the live if it wasn't done by their favorite member, rather than say such hurtful things. it was always “where's sana?” or “call nayeon” or “i want to see mina”, and sometimes, it made jina think, “am i not enough for them?”

when jina began noticing some comments in the chat section that were a bit too aggressive and/or rude for her liking, she gently tapped dahyun's leg under the table. the older girl turned to face the younger, who gave her a look that she understood well.

“once,” dahyun called out to gain the attention of their fans. “i think it's time for us to say goodbye for today. thank you for being with us for a while. and sorry we didn't really do anything fun.”

“we've been missing you guys a lot lately, so that's why some members would randomly go on vlive. and because we missed you, it was nice to hang out like this,” jina continued. “take care and goodbye!” the two girls waved goodbye and briefly scanned through the chat as their fans also bid them farewell, before dahyun pressed on the icon to end the call.

jina leaned back against the couch once the phone screen turned black, a soft sigh escaping her lips. “some of them can be too much sometimes.” dahyun shot her a sympathetic look, knowing what jina meant and understanding the draining feeling. “i know...but it's okay. there are still plenty of them who aren't like that,” she reassured. jina smiled weakly and nodded.

“yeah, there are still plenty of them who make it all worth it.”

moral of the story: be watchful of what you say to idols on vlive.

don't ask me what everyone is doing in the maknae dorm.

also this was actually the first scenario i've ever written for this au, so i was conflicted over posting it or not. it's here now though so i'm sorry if it's bad.

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count-woe-laf · 3 years

Text

You can’t spell stargaze without gays

I write? Since when? Yes I’m aware the title makes no sense, I’m uncreative. This was supposed to be a late birthday present for @me-a-mess-morelikelythanyouthink but it’s super late now, I still enjoyed writing it and planning it with her, I hope you’re having a great day, Silver. I’m sorry I got science facts wrong and I don’t know how to end things or how normal people talk

Logan and Virgil are hopeless pining gay idiots with horrible communication skills, but they’re working on it. (Romantic analogical, very background royality and platonic dukeceit.) 1850 words

"Bring me a diet coke!" Virgil called to Roman as he ran out of the truck, through the gravel parking lot, and towards the bright 7/11.

Logan let out a small laugh from next to him. "You know he's going to spend an hour flirting with the cashier and forget."

"Yeah I know, it's fine. Surprising that he's moved up from panicking around Patton to flirting with him, that's what I call character development."

"Character development that's gone on for ten too many seasons."

"True. But while he's in there I have more time to spend with you," Virgil replied with a smirk, Logan's cheeks reddening.

"You all are disgusting," called Remus from the backseat.

"I agree," Janus sighed. "Though I can do many things, understanding allos is not one of them."

"Then get out of my truck," Virgil jokingly glared into the rearview mirror.

"It's Roman's truck-" Logan started, Virgil shifted his glare towards him. "Ok yeah, get out."

"Think we can find bigfoot, Jan?"

"We're only half an hour away from the city, try again," but Janus let himself be dragged out into the nearby forest.

Logan and Virgil were left alone, thoughts of what had gone on the past week between them running through their heads. The hand brushes, the late night phone calls, the hoodies, the excessive amount of feelings that for once, neither of them minded. There was always more to say though.

"You can see lots of stars from out here," Virgil commented rather nervously. "You should come outside with me and look at them."

It was an offering just for Logan. He was the only one allowed to stargaze with Virgil while others were flirting in a 7/11 and being chaotic in a forest. Logan and Virgil in the bed of a truck staring at the night sky. ...Well, one of them was looking at the stars.

"You know to stargaze you actually have to look at them, right? You can just look at me, V."

"Who's saying you're not a star? 'Cause you definitely are, love."

"Love?" Logan tilted his head towards Virgil's red face.

"Uh-" Virgil looked away quickly. "What is that constellation? It looks like a spoon."

"Do you seriously not know? That's the big dipper, it's part of the constellation ursa major."

"You're the science-y one here, how would I know?" Logan just sighed. "You should keep talking though, I love your voice."

"Oh… Well that's the northern star…"

"Why is it called that?"

"Um, it's the most northern star, I believe astronomers base things off of it."

Virgil snoted, "wow. Star dudes sure are creative."

Logan looked over, an indescribable emotion on his face. "Pardon me, but did you just call astronomers, 'star dudes'?"

Virgil stared back, a teasing glint in his eyes. "Star. Dudes."

"...I will defenestrate you."

"Oh?"

"Do you even know what that means?"

"Yeah," Virgil said. "It means you pick me up and I get to simp over your muscles."

"It also means I throw you out of a window."

"I'll take what I can get." Logan let out a fond sigh. "Ok 'cause your constellations are boring and factual- don't worry I still love them- but I'm telling stories now."

"You're going to kill me."

"In your dreams, babe."

"What's that supposed to-"

"Over there is Elenor, it kinda looks like a bunny, I know. Their boyfriend is Jesse over there-"

"Virgil I swear, I'm leaving you in the forest." Logan's words gave a much different meaning when he was struggling to keep in his laugh.

Virgil chucked. "Oh Logan, so naive, there's so much more. Those three stars? Yeah they're Bo Peep's sheep."

Logan choked, the statement taking him by surprise. "Excuse me? You can't just…"

"Y'know, from Toy Story? Doesn't she have three sheep or something? I swear that was a plot point in one of the movies."

"The threat of being thrown out of a window still stands, Virge."

"Good, now that star over there…"

"Her name is Jennifer, she got a constellation for making the best bean salad."

Virgil tried to hold in a laugh. "And what did you say that one was?"

Logan was so enamoured with Virgil's laugh that he almost didn't notice him intertwining their fingers. Almost. He still had to take a breath to regain his nearly non-existent composure. Although fifteen minutes couldn't have passed, Logan could tell that it was a good decision to accept Roman's offer for a fake road trip.

"That guy with the belt?" Logan continued. "He was the first person to invent clothes. Quite the fashion icon for his time."

"Oh yeah?" Virgil giggled and Logan's heart stuttered in his chest.

"Yeah, he was also the only straight man in his village. It was very controversial." Virgil hummed in response, trying to calm his laughter.

"We're pretty controversial."

"What do you mean by that?"

"We're lying in the bed of Roman's truck, well past midnight and the city limits, looking at stars. Janus and Remus are probably lost in the forest and Roman and Patton have probably gotten over their gay panic and are planning their wedding together."

"I'm not sure how that's controversial, but it is interesting that we've achieved nothing compared to them." Logan's eyes drifted back to the stars.

"I think not getting lost is a plus." He made a noise of agreement. "And uh… I know we're not as vocal about stuff like the others but… Dating you wouldn't be bad." It came out more like a question, causing Logan to look back at him.

"Fuck- I mean-" Virgil ran a hand down his face. "It would actually be really really nice if I could be your boyfriend because- ugh stop staring at me like that! It's just that you're really great and nice to be around and to talk to and I can't imagine you not being in my life. A-and I know we've been kinda sorta dating but you know how dumb we both are about romance and all that stuff- oh god this is romance, I can't believe that…

"I just really like you, Logan and I need to make sure you know that."

Virgil's words swirled into the air, into the sky, into that great expanse of stars and light.

They laid there and stared at the stars, thinking, considering, and a fair amount of staring on Logan's side.

He couldn't help it, really. He couldn't stop his eyes tracing the curve of his jaw, his bitten lips, the words that previously escaped them were still spinning through Logan's head. And Virgil's hair, his adorably messy hair that was usually hanging in front of his eyes, was pushed to the side, Logan could see a galaxy reflected in his beautiful eyes.

Virgil was his galaxy, his sun, his stars. He had kept him sane through years of school. He constantly went out of his way just to brighten Logan's day a little bit more, and brighten he did.

Virgil meant everything to him and he'd be damned if he went home tonight without showing him that.

"Didn't… Didn't you say you always wanted to go stargazing with your partner?"

"Uhh, yeah." Virgil replied hoarsely.

"I suppose you get to cross that off your list, then." Logan wondered how he suddenly had some semblance of smoothness to his words.

"Oh."

The stars seemed awfully bright that night, especially in the way they reflected off Virgil's freckles.

"Is… Is that a shooting star?" Virgil lifted his free hand, tracing the bright line across the map of stars.

"There's no such thing as shooting stars." Virgil rolled his eyes. "But, I… do believe that's a satellite."

"Then make a wish."

"That's stupid and makes no sense, wishing on a satellite has no affect on my life."

"Just do it, my northern star."

Logan's red face was a reflection off the far away street lights, nothing else. "Am I supposed to tell you what I wished for?"

"Not really, but you can. I'd love to know what goes on in that brilliant head of yours."

"My head is empty, unfortunately." Virgil laughed, he did that quite a bit around him. "I wished that we'd have a good relationship. Apologizes, is that weird, or too soon? I… just mean that we're both terrible at communicating, I hope that we can improve together as a couple."

“Oh."

Although Virgil may not have realized it, Logan noticed as he lightly brushed his thumb over his hand. It was stupidly endearing and soft, just as Virgil was.

"That's probably the cutest thing anyone's ever said that slightly regards me."

"Glad I can be of service, darling."

"So darling is what you go with?"

"Would you prefer something else?"

"...No. If I can call you my boyfriend you can call me whatever you want." Virgil smiled. "…You're my boyfriend. That's nice to say."

"It is. I wonder how I stumbled upon a boyfriend as good as you."

"You- you need to stop doing that," Virgil blushed.

"I'm not doing anything!" Logan shifted closer to him, for heating purposes of course, it was a little chilly. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You know full well."

"Do I really, Virgil?"

"Shut up and look at the stars."

"Make me."

"Logan I swear-"

"Fine, fine, I will." Virgil mumbled thanks under his breath. "But they aren't as pretty as you."

Virgil let out a noise, a mix between a screech and a cough. There was no way he was showing Logan how fluttery his words made his heart feel. (Although he felt it was common knowledge among them.)

"There's around twenty minutes until the others get back, that's twenty minutes to mess with you."

"I'm already regretting this, Lo."

"As you should, my love."

Yes, their friends may have interrupted their stargazing a few minutes later. Yes, Roman may have forced Patton to leave his shift early resulting in one too little seats and an angry boss. Yes, they may have almost ran out of gas on the way home. Yes, they may have bought fries as Janus looked for a gas station. Yes, they may have fallen onto the floor seconds later. Yes, Remus may have jumped out of the car afterwards because he said it looked fun and almost sprained his ankle. And yes, Roman did have to explain the situation five times to his parents because they couldn't stop laughing about all the shenanigans they got into that night.

Still, Virgil's arm stayed around Logan's waist like it was the most casual thing in the world. Still, they shared a milkshake once everyone had given up on the fallen fries. Still, they were both filled with such a bright happiness that it was impossible to drag them down. And maybe they fell asleep on a video call that night. Or maybe Logan stayed over and they woke up with their limbs tangled in each other's, feeling content and appreciative of the other as they slowly woke up. Honestly, who's to say? It was just a good night.

#analogical #logan sanders #virgil sanders #sanders sides #sanders sides fanfic #sanders sides fanfiction #hope y'all enjoyed this because I'm kinda proud of it #love you sil #ts logan #ts virgil #also yeah i have a taglist tell me if you want to be added #pen throws away a pen

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anechan · 3 years

Text

KUROKEN (kuroo x kenma) 🔥

⚠️SEXUAL ACT⚠️

Chemistry teacher /part2

It has been only 2 days since kenma and kuroo last saw and met at school. The weekend has arrived. Instead of leaving the house all tidy for Saturday night, he came out with a bag and classic clothes with the excuse of going to the chemistry supplement. Kenma studied chemistry all day so as not to discourage kuroo and to bring his reward from the person he loved. Kuroo left a piece of paper under kenma's address table on Friday before starting the first class. After some time of walking, kenma walked to the house where his professor lived. The house was a little more luxurious, the professor's salary couldn't really exceed the taxes for all that. He ignored all those details around the house and just rang the bell. After a few minutes the kuroo opened the door to his student and closed it after he entered

Kenma: You are the director's son right

Kuroo : hah God forbid. That man has been on my nerves from the beginning.

He led him to the dining room where they sat

Kuroo: how it went on the physical

Kenma: sitting on benches

Kuroo : I saved you

Kenma: Save me again

Kuroo bent his head from the hall to the table

Kuroo: very funny. Did you study?

Kenma: As you can see, my black holee under eyes don't lie

Kuroo : like neither test

He handed him the assignment paper and walked past him rubbing his hair

Kuroo: when my wife arrives say you are a student

Kenma: You don't have a wife

Kuroo: Are you such a stalker

Kenma: As you can see

Kuroo : You better start if you want to achieve something

Kenma really studied for a long time so he could talk to kuroo . After half an hour he finished the test

Kenma: KUROO

Kuroo: don’t yell, come upstairs

Kenma took the paper and took that chairs up the stairs. Only one room was open so he stepped into it. Kuroo was lying on a huge bed and almost fell asleep.

Kuroo :I am lazy to examine you. What did you want to talk about?

Kenma : I didn't say anything, you said you would reward me

Kuroo : did I say something else

Kenma : Out-of-school plans

Kuroo: and? What did you think about that? How do you imagine that

Kenma: Didn't you say you were my professor

Kuroo: Teachers and students do not have intimate activities

Kenma: Weren't you the one who was against it

Kuroo : I can pretend that nothing happened if you were in front of -.... someone is naughty

Kuroo failed to finish his sentence because during that time kenma fought by the bed and sat in kuroo lap

Kenma: If I told you I liked you, it means you can't stop it

Kenma ran his hand over kuroo 's neck and face.

Kuroo : You know, you shouldn't try anything. It's only been two days, I can hurt you

Kenma: I don't care

Kuroo : Well, it's not in my interest to hurt you tiny boy, why don't you get a little closer

With his hands, the kuroo took the kenma by his hips and pulled it even closer to him, so that the kenma would eventually sit on the kuroos thing.

Kenma: You are very big kuroo

Kuroo: and you are very thight

Kenma: But you like me anyway

Kuroo : You won't make me take off my clothes. I already told you

Kenma: but you said you would reward me

Kenma lay on kuroo 's chest just below his head

Kenma: please kuroo , I want it

Kuroo: Don't

Kenma reached his hand to kuroos thing starting to circle around him.

Kenma: Make me stop

Kuroo : don't challenge me, I won't fuck you kenma but you'll get hurt if you don't stop

Kenma: Then punishes me, daddy

Kenma provoked kuroo's words and began to tease him even more with his hand and then with his lips touching kuroo 's neck.

Kuroo : I warn you

Kenma continued but this time he moved his ass and forth with his back.

Kenma: ah kuroo I can't resist you

Kuroo : Let's solve it

Kuroo pushed the kenma to the side, holding his hands in the air

Kuroo : You really want me to be crazy

Kenma: I want to see what you're like outside of school

Kuroo: oh you will not see, you will feel

He unbuttoned his zipper on his jeans and put the kenma back to the side. He leaned against the bed frame and approached the kenma all the way to him

Kuroo : if you really want it then make me do it

Kenma: why don’t we just get to the point

Kuroo: You want me to stop this too

Kenma put his hand on kuroos thing . He began to move his body along with his ass back and forth. Kuroo wanted to deal with kenma's intact body leaving small bites on his neck

Kuroo : mmmh, you’re really perfect when you’re a good boy kenma

Kuroo threw his hands behind the kenma lowering his tracksuit so he could feel his student's body more easily.

Kenma: how much more

Kuroo : You saw what it looks like I tell you kenma you won't be able to walk

Kenma: school is on Monday that's far away

Kuroo: I warned you

Kenma didn't care how much he was going to get hurt, he just wanted to kuroo fuck him. Kenma didn't care how much he will get hurt, he just wanted kuroo to love him. Only a minute passed after kuroos warning and they were without underwear. Kenma started to turn but was stopped by kuroo

Kuroo : I want to look at your face

Kuroo lifted the kenma and put it on himself even deeper which kenma did not expect

Kenma: ahhhhh hn h

Kuroo : and yes. Since you said to punish you, I don't allow you to say anything. Let alone finish

Kenma: thats not-ahhn

Kuroo :What I said, kenma repeated

Kenma repeated his action up and down trying to keep quiet

Kuroo : I told you something, repeat

He teased kenma forcing him to repeat even though kenma would start moaning as soon as he opened his mouth.

Kenma: tt-o be-qq-uite

Kuroo: That's right, I hope you stick to it. This pace is slow we could speed up huh?

Although kenma wanted to have a relationship with kuroo outside of school, he did not want kuroo to speed up because he would not be able to keep quiet.

Kuroo : I will consider it as yes

Tears rolled down kenma 's cheek from the enjoyment that kuroo could not show. He put his hand to his mouth and bit it to keep his mouth shut. Kuroo was spoiled and took his hand off his mouth holding it back behind his back.

Kuroo : Will you be good from now and learn

Kenma: mmhm

Kuroo : and you won't ask a professor to fuck you in school

Kenma : yyes

Kuroo : Okay now you can

He let go of the kenma's hands, cummed as he stepped out of it. Kenma was breathing like never before. Kuroo took it and placed it in his lap.

Kuroo : hm? Why are you so quiet

Kenma placed his head on kuroos chest, wrapping his arms around him.

Kuroo: happy, you got your reward-

Kenma : I want you to kiss me

Kuroo : what?

Kenma: You heard me

Kuroo : Well I can't until u sit straight

Kenma:I am not even straight

Hongjoong raised his head as the kuroo approached him and pressed his lips to the kenmas . Leaving short little kisses

Kuroo: You really want me so much

Kenma: Yes

Kuroo : Promise me no one will know about us and we can get started

Kenma: I promise everything but not chemistry

Kuroo : do you want another rou-

Kenma: okay and chemistry

Kuroo: Agreed baby boy

#fanfic #haikyuu ships #writing #anime #haikyuu oneshot #haikyuu!!#haikyuu smut #kuroken #kuroo x kenma

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stargaze-issei · 4 years

Text

ᴅᴀʏ 𝟽; ғᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ sᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ

-> semi eita.

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭; post timeskip!semi begins to have feelings for his neighbour, a skillful drummer.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬; a few curse words, mentions of alcohol.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭; 1.5k

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞; fluff.

↳ main masterlist

opportunities didn't lack in tokyo, it was so overwhelming that you didn't know where to start looking. back in you little town there was no such a thing as unknown, you were well aware of all the possible paths you could take back there, which led to you leaving searching for new experiences. your family was against it, to say the least, they saw you as a little girl who needed to be protected, who would protect you when you were far away from them? but your mind was set, so you packed your clothes, your drums would have to wait a bit until you found a steady place, put some things in boxes, and spent as much as you could in a somewhat nice apartment in the middle of tokyo.

since then had been two months, and finally, your precious musical instrument were about to arrive. just as you thought about it, the doorbell rang. you jumped from your place, thrilled to see you most beloved belongins, only to find your neighbour, who seemed to have had an intense night.

"don't look so sad to see me, angel" he greeted, gaining a smirk from you. once you grew familiar with his messy looks and flirting way of being, he turned out to be a really nice person.

"do you need an aspirin, semi?" you ignored his words, moving aside to let him in "aren't you something from the goverment? are you even allowed to party like that?"

"too many questions and no aspirins, y/n" he had this habit of visiting your place, despite never letting you into his home. you stuck you tongue out, making him laugh a little, before going to get medicine "and i just stayed up late with the band, the drummer left and we have shows coming up" you could feel the tiredness in his voice even from rooms appart.

"i'm sure you'll find someone" you tried cheering him when handling the promised pill, he just smiled before taking it without water "you're going to choke"

"you worry about me?"

"i don't want your dead body on my carpet, there's a difference" he winked at you, like you had said the complete opposite.

with semi that's how it worked, you'd be lying if you said you had never taken his constant flirting a little too serious, maybe hoping such a handsome man would be interested in you, but you knew there was nothing else than his personality. still, he had a way to make you feel comfortable, being the first person to gain your trust in less than two months. sometimes you'd hang with people from work, or others musician you had known along the weeks, but they didn't make you feel the way semi did.

"okay, princess, imma get going, i have to finish some papers for work" he got up, arranging his clothes "unless you wanna do something else" his tone indicating what kind of activities he referred to made you giggle.

"go work, i won't take you in if you get fired" between other jokes from both, he finally left your appartment.

you were left with a fuzzy feeling in your stomach and a not so subtle blush in your skin, damn be semi and his easyness to make you feel weird.

a few hours passed until your bell rang again, this time being what you were so desperately expecting. it took you less than half an hour to set your drums in the almost empty living room, you chekced the time at your phone, the ladowner had said you could be as loud as you wanted before eleven p.m. on work nights, in the bulding were mainly musicians, so it wasn't weird to hear a trumpet at breakfast, followed by a loud electric guitar and a hundred other things.

your hands moved on their own when they held the drumstick, letting all the emotions you had been bottling up the last couple of months. the sound drowning your ears, nothing else mattered there. a few apartments away, semi caught on a different sound, a sound he hadn't heard before in the building. someone was playing drums, but to say they were playing them didn't feel right, it was something else. he could feels this person's feelings, exactly what they were trying to pour into each hit, none of his past drummers had made him feel that way.

he got up of his couch, leaving his laptop by his side, ready to follow the sound to its source. whoever was playing had to be a professional, maybe he could make them join his band, he sure hope he could. with that sound, there were few things his group couldn't achieve.

there must be something wrong, he thought, because you didn't play drums, and somehow the sound came from inside your apartment, were you playing a record? no, he could feel the vibrations through the door, there was an actual person playing actual drums. how could it be? he had been there two hours ago, he knew how small the rooms were, the only place you could fit something as big was the living room, but there was nothing. had he been too focused looking at you that he didn't notice it? it wasn't his fault, you were wearing home clothes, he always loved how pretty you looked on those.

semi knocked on the door only to feel stupid after, there was no way you'd hear him with all that noise. he started to look for the spare key you hid under the rug, getting his fingers all dusty before finding it. what he saw when he opened the door took away all the words from his mouth. your eyes were closed, little hints of sweat covered you face and neck, while your hands and feet move frenetically making and incredible harmonic melody.

when you opened your eyes, semi was standing in front of you, mouth half-opened. you, by instinct, threw a drumstick towards him, who on earth enters another person's apartment without even having a key? you just don't do that on a woman, for god's sake.

"what the fuck are you doing!?"

"don't throw a fucking stick at me!"

"don't do... that! fuck!"

"you never said you played drums!"

"you never asked!"

"stop yelling at me!"

"i'm sorry!"

both stared at each other, silent for a moment, before bursting into laugh. you went to hug him, excusing a meeting, and he happily accepted between his arms. he sat in the island of the kitchen, while you headed to get a beer for both. semi was smiling, sort of proud of the made discovery, but totally forgetting what he wanted to ask you.

"you're really good" said the singer after a while.

"i hope i am, i've been playing since i was ten" his eyes opened in shock, drinking from his bottle, that was quite a long time.

the sweat from before still stained your skin, and the sun from the window made you look like you were shining. you took a zip of beer, and he actually thought on getting over his insecurity and just go kiss you.

semi saw you the day you moved in for the first time, struggling with carrying two boxes at the same time. he offered you help, not because he instantly fell in love with you, he was just feeling kind. you, at the beginning, had been reluctant to letting an strange man into you apartment, but to leave your things outside in the open, like waiting for someone to steal so little you had, was bigger than anything. you were surprised by how nice semi was, despite of his look of a homeless musician, which he kind of was. after that, he would invite you to his rehearsals, or accompany you to do groceries, found any excuse to be near you.

he thought to be around you was better than being alone in his house, stressing over idiotic details, with you, he felt calmer, like back in his highschool days, when everything was within the reach of his hands. yeah, he had come to the conclusion he felt a lot of things towards you, still rejecting the word love.

"i- you- um, band?" the lack of connectors in his so called sentence made you grin, "would you like to play with us?" he finally asked, looking at the floor, suddenly flustered.

playing with semi was something you had thought about a lot, his voice was so angelic, your mind often wondered on which tunes could go along with it, with which guitar tone.

"oh, uh, yeah, i would" his smile grew wider, unconsciously realizing how much time together you would spend.

"maybe we could go on a date, someday, um, if you want to" it was cute to see semi blushing, playing with his fingers, not being able to even look at you.

"i would like that too, semi" while you talked, he lifted his head to face you, his eyes shining in excitement, had you really said yes?

semi stayed at your place that day, talking, getting to know you, drinking beer. he thought you were so interesting, he could have stayed listening to your for even more hours. you were excited to let semi into your life, and semi was more than eager to feel a part to you.

⌙ 𝟐𝟎𝟎 𝐟𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 🥳

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writingsfromstarfleet · 4 years

Text

Safe Space - Elim Garak X Reader

A/N: For a lovely Anon, as always please enjoy and I hope it’s what you wanted! You lot too, thank you for reading! X

TW: mentions of self harm/depression etc. so if that makes you uncomfortable, please skip this one! Know also that if you’re going through anything like this that you are loved and you are wonderful x

Life, in your case, had been easy in the eye of others. For years, your family had been a part of Starfleet, and it was practically paved in stone for you to follow in their footsteps. You were academically gifted, and not to mention the few hobbies you had on the side, too. To others, your life was idyllic. A loving family, a good education, a career. Nothing in your life was anything less than perfect.

Except it was.

You struggled with what people couldn't see, and it had affected you greatly. For years, you had dealt with declining mental health issues, despite your best efforts to not let it stop you from achieving what you wanted. In lieu of it all, however, you had secured yourself a place on Deep Space Nine, studying and working alongside some of the most talented minds in Starfleet.

Over the course of your stay there, you had made friends along the way who you knew would be for life. Your closest friend, however, came in the form of the stations resident Cardassian, Elim Garak. An unlikely bond, you clicked with him after he opened up to you about his own struggles, and you knew in that moment he was going to be your safe place.

And he was. Every time you had an issue, regardless of how big or small, Garak was there for you through it all. Where you would be without him, you didn't know, nor did you want to know. Garak was more than happy to help you with anything and everything, and always reassured you that he would never judge you. Thus, you did. You told him everything, and each time you were met with kindness and understanding, a shoulder to cry on.

Though, things did begin to go bad again. Your mental health had taken a dip, and you had managed to convince yourself that you had no right to be aboard the station, that you were taking up someone else's place. You convinced yourself that there were smarter and better qualified people at the academy waiting for your job. You convinced yourself that your friends weren't really your friends, that they simply put up with you. Through it, you played off to your friends that you were fine, a false smile plastered on your face and laughter that was less than genuine leaving your lips. Every single day, it became almost routine and began to get exhausting.

Often, you thought of Garak. Your brain told you that he didn't really care, just like the others; it told you that you shouldn't bother him with your problems when he could have things he's dealing with himself. Which is why, as you sat in your quarters, you looked down to your healed scars, and you took a turn for the worse.

Garak wondered where you were, usually you would meet him at this time every day for a drink, and his shop felt empty without you sat on the couch bugging him to finish up. He told himself you were caught up with work, as most of the crew had been recently. Carrying on working, he couldn't quite shake the feeling that something was off. It was only when it reached the hour mark that he decided to shut up shop for the day and venture off to your quarters. You were far more important than any pair of pants.

Hearing the door ring, you decided to remain quiet, not bothering to even check who was there. You were lay on the bed, the cuts on your legs stinging and your eyes sore and red from crying. You were hardly in a state to see anybody anyway. Still, the door persisted. Very quietly, you sighed and, climbing under the covers, you shouted for them to enter. In walked Garak, and in seconds he was by your side.

"Is everything alright, Y/N? I missed you today." he spoke softly, placing a hand on your forehead as if checking you were well.

"M'fine, just tired..." your voice was muffled and quiet, and Garak became concerned. You most certainly were not your usual self. You snuggled yourself into the blanket, and Garak's hand moved to your shoulder.

"Alright. Are you going to tell me what's actually happened, then?" The tone of his voice made clear to you that he didn't believe anything you were saying. It's true what they say; you can't kid a kidder. He looked down when you didn't answer, unsure of what to say next. His eyes wandered to the small stain on the floor just beneath the bed, and he darted his eyes back up to yours, which were currently focused on the side table.

"I'm sorry," you began, sensing there was no point in arguing; he knew exactly what had happened. "I really am, I just-"

"You need not apologise to me," he cut you off, pulling your head up from its place half under the cover to make you look at him. "Nor do you have to explain. I understand. I only wish you had come to me sooner, you're too dear to me to ever have you in such a position where you feel this is the only way out."

You blinked back a few tears, and he cupped your face with one hand, his free hand coming to rest lightly on your leg, which was still under covers. You flinched, and he sighed to himself. He knew from your past conversations that you had harmed previously there, and sensed that was what had occurred this time. You sniffed, and moved aside slightly, a silent invitation for him to join you. Garak wasted no time in rising from his kneeling position to sitting atop your bed next to the covers, which you still had wrapped firmly around you, not wanting him to see the mess. You brought yourself to his side, and his arms found their way around you, one resting at the small of your back and one running through your hair.

A fair few minutes of silence passed, Garak offering as much comfort to you as he could. The silence wasn't uncomfortable, either, it was welcomed, and you stayed there in his arms for what felt like forever before you felt confident enough to speak up.

"I'm sorry, Garak. I know you always say to come to you, and I don't really know why I didn't. I was convinced everyone doesn't want me here, including you, and I guess it just scared me.. it sounds pathetic, doesn't it," you interrupted yourself with a small chuckle; saying it out loud made it sound ridiculous.

"Does that sound as foolish to you as it does to me now you've said it?" Garak's words sunk in, and you admitted to yourself it did indeed sound awfully idiotic. "I understand these feelings, I understand how hard they can be to deal with, Y/N, you know that. And I know that often, you can feel that there's no other way out than to harm yourself. But I do want you to know that, as powerful as those thoughts can be, they are not the answer. Always, they are incorrect. We love you, all of us. There's not a single person I know who says a bad word about you. Never feel alone, Y/N, we're all here for you. This was never the answer. Promise me it will never be the answer you choose again."

"I'll never be able to thank you, you know," you started, voice a little louder this time. "You're wonderful."

"As long as you're alright, that's thanks enough, my dear Y/N."

Lifting your head to look at him, you shifted and smiled to him. His face softened at seeing you smile, glad that he had managed to make you smile, at least.

"You do have a way with words, Garak. Somehow you always have the right thing to say, and it's always what I need. I promise you, this won't happen again."

It was Garak's turn to smile, for he knew that you were telling him the truth. After all, you can't kid a kidder.

#tw: depression #tw: self harm #star trek #star trek imagine #star trek x reader #star trek deep space nine #star trek ds9 #deep space nine #ds9 #elim garak #garak #garak x reader #garak imagine #x reader #imagine

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sonicrainicorn · 4 years

Text

Alone at Sea

Part of the Berry Done AU

Words: 3081 Desc.: Logan gets the worst dose of reality when his abusive ex-boyfriend tries to come back into his life. TW: Past relationship abuse, harassment, anxiety attack

A short interlude before we get to the messy clean up :)

///

Truth be told, Logan’s guard wasn’t down a hundred percent yet. Yes, Patton continued to be a kind and caring person, but that still didn’t prove anything. Not yet. They were going to be approaching their two year anniversary soon; as far as Logan was concerned, that would be the real test.

It seemed like a lot of things in his life started to turn around after two years.

Not always for the better.

“I’ll pick you up after work, okay?” Patton said as Logan prepared to leave the car. “Don’t even think about trying to do homework or studying or anything. Free day today.”

Also known as date night. Logan rolled his eyes. “Sure.”

“Logan Sanders, I am serious. You deserve a break.”

Logan paused. Patton always seemed to know when he was feeling overworked. He turned to him with a small smile. “I’ll see you in a few hours.” He left before Patton could try to berate him further.

Today wouldn’t necessarily be the easiest to get through, but he’d manage. All his challenging classes were lined up for today. He didn’t consider that when he scheduled them, too focused on finding the best way to work this new semester into his life, so now he paid the price. It wasn’t that big of a deal for the most part, but sometimes he ended the day being too mentally exhausted to do any hard thinking.

Still, he’d survive.

And, for today at least, he had Patton to look forward to. It was always nice to spend time with Patton. Everything felt different with him. The world a little brighter, the future not so daunting. It was like everything would be okay. At least for a little. And even if it didn’t stay it would be back again soon. Bad times didn’t last forever. Logan knew that, of course. In theory. In practice was a whole other thing. But Patton helped bridge that gap a little bit at a time.

By the time Logan finished his first class he started to think that maybe this day wouldn’t be so difficult after all. Only two more to go, and the next one started in ten minutes. He stopped by the student store for a quick snack before going on his way. He didn’t wake up with enough time to eat breakfast anymore. He tried, but more sleep always sounded more appealing than food. Getting later classes wasn’t an option; he tended to work nights and still needed enough time to do homework. Morning and early afternoon was the only opportunity he had for classes.

After their financial situation got better, Thomas tried to insist that Logan didn’t need to work. He should focus on school. And while Logan agreed with that sentiment, he knew that couldn’t happen. Thomas was trying to go to school again, but he needed to be a part-time student in order to comply with his work schedule. Unfortunately, that meant he wouldn’t receive financial aid. So Logan kept his job. It sucked. Kind of a lot -- but it was for Thomas.

That made it worth it.

Logan stared at his notes as the professor lectured. He had messy note-taking handwriting. His handwriting, in general, wasn’t the prettiest, but it seemed as soon as he started taking notes it got uglier. Perhaps part of that had to do with trying to keep up with the information being given. Well, whatever. As long as he could read it it was fine.

He snapped out of his daze when he heard people around him pack their things. Class finished already? He double-checked the time -- just to see for sure -- and found that class did indeed finish. Right on time as always. He should probably stop zoning out in this class.

He put away his stuff and left. Two down one to go. Regrettably, there was an hour and a half until the next one. Logan hated having such large gaps between classes, but this time slot was the only one that wasn’t during another class or too late in the day. On the bright side, the extra free time meant he could work on homework (or take a nap, depending on how he felt).

Finding a good spot to hang out could be a hassle sometimes, however. Logan preferred to be as alone as possible, yet that could be difficult to achieve on a bustling college campus. There was always at least someone, though it was possible to be completely alone in certain places. For at least a short while.

“Logan!”

Logan halted with a small frown. That voice sounded... familiar. But there was a chance he was imagining it just because they said his name. It might not have even been for him. Still, he turned around. His heart lodged in his throat.

“Hey,” Percival said with a smile as he caught up. “It’s been a while.”

He got taller. That fact made Logan’s stomach turn. Having to look up even further see a face he thought would be long gone felt like some form of punishment. Or perhaps a penance. “H-how did...?”

Despite not being close to a full sentence (or even a loud volume), Percy understood. “Well, it wasn’t like I was looking for you. I started coming here last semester, and I met someone that happened to know you.”

While Logan didn’t have the proper social skills to make friends, other people did. It seemed, whether he wanted to or not, they would get acquainted with each other. They didn’t force themselves in, but rather found ways to weasel through. Quil was an example of one such person. But he never thought he was significant enough for anyone to mention in conversation -- with his past abuser no less. Of course, he only told three people out of everyone he knew, so he couldn’t blame anyone but himself.

“It’s been a while since we last saw each other so I asked what you were up to -- and it turns out you’re going here, too! I was hoping to run into you before I asked them for your number or anything. Just my luck to see you today.”

Logan could only manage a tight-lipped hum of agreement. He needed to find out who he talked to and explain why this was an issue.

Percy’s smile fell a bit. “Look,” he started slowly. Almost cautiously. “I know I wasn’t... the best... to you in high school. But that’s why I needed to talk to you so badly. I’m different now. I want to show you that.”

No, no, no, no, no. “What, what are you implying exactly?” More than his heart tried to crawl out of his throat.

“Let me take you out tonight. On a date -- anywhere you want to go. We can start fresh.”

Logan’s fingers twitched reflexively. As if reaching for Patton’s hand -- almost always an index finger away. It wasn’t there. “Uh, I-I’m busy tonight. Sorry.” He turned to leave.

Percy cut him off. “Then we’ll try another night. Please just give me a chance.”

Logan froze. He didn’t know what to do. His mind was screaming at him to run away -- to grab someone’s attention -- to do something. But he couldn’t move. He could barely breathe.

“Please, Logan, I’ve changed,” Percy continued to beg. “Let me prove it to you.”

“I’m seeing someone else,” Logan muttered meekly. He tried to get around, but a hand shot out and grabbed his arm. His entire body went cold. “P-please let me go.”

“Just give me a chance. That’s all I want, Logan, just a chance.”

He glanced up and saw a girl staring at him with wide eyes. She quickly turned down to her phone. “I don’t -- I won’t give you one. I’ve, I’ve said no already. That should be enough for you.” He tried to tug his arm back.

Percy pulled him closer. “I’m not going to let you give me a ‘no’. I’ve been waiting for this moment for too long.”

“You’re not going to get anything other than a ‘no’.” A brittle rage pulled at Logan. He didn’t want this man anywhere near him. Nothing about him had changed at all. “There’s someone else now. I don’t want anything to do with you anymore.” He yanked his arm free. “Now leave me alone.” He hurried away before Percy could do anything else.

As soon as the anger left him, the fear came back again. So many questions swirled around in his brain: what if Percy continued to look for him? What if he really wouldn’t take no for an answer? What would happen then? He feared for his safety as well as the safety of everyone he knew. He didn’t know the lengths Percy would be willing to go to. He didn’t want to find out.

He couldn’t breathe.

The ground became hard to follow. He needed somewhere to sit down.

A tree. There was a tree. No one was sitting by it and the shade looked inviting. He went to it. He curled up into a tight ball and tried to focus on breathing. He never realized how hard it was. His whole body trembled with emotion and he found himself choking on sobs as well as air.

Patton.

He needed Patton. Patton would make everything better.

He brought the phone up to his ear. After a few rings there came a soft, “Hello?” But Logan couldn’t bring himself to say anything. He couldn’t. Patton didn't need to know this. It wasn’t his problem. He didn’t have to worry about it.

“Logan? Are you alright? Is something wrong?”

Logan hung up.

For a moment, he considered calling Thomas, but the same reasoning came up. Thomas didn’t need to worry. As soon as Logan mentioned Percy, he would already be on his way. He couldn’t do that to him. They were both convinced Percy would stay in the past.

So Logan kept it to himself. He shut his eyes and tried to ground himself. He could do it. He had to. He couldn’t let anyone else know what happened. They didn’t need to worry. They didn’t.

“Um. Hey,” a soft voice caused him to snap his eyes open. The girl he saw earlier stood nervously in front of him with concern all over her features. “A-are you okay?”

Logan tried to say he was fine -- don’t worry about it, go away -- but only broken syllables left his mouth. He knew she wouldn’t believe him even if he said so.

“I’m gonna sit here, alright?” She lowered herself to the ground. Not too close. Not too far. “I’m Dahlia, by the way, but, um, do you wanna go somewhere else? Are you fine being here?”

“M’fine,” he managed to get out. He curled his fingers around the grass.

“Okay. I’m gonna stay with you, alright? Just until you get better. You’re okay. I’m gonna help you through this, alright? It won’t last forever.”

Dahlia stayed true to her word. She was calm and gentle and way too kind for a stranger witnessing someone else’s anxiety attack. It was clear she had knowledge of this but was still inexperienced with it. Like she read what to do but had never put it into practice before. She even knew a couple of breathing tricks and went through with the one Logan found the most helpful. She continued to stay even after the initial chaos settled down.

And it made Logan feel a little bad. He was dragging a stranger into his problems when he could have handled it himself. She had better things to do than monitor a cry baby running away from his issues.

“So, uh, if you don’t mind me asking,” Dahlia messed with the blades of grass in front of her, “who was that guy?”

Logan couldn’t get his mouth to move. He could have told her. She had no connection to his life -- she’d probably never speak to him again. But he couldn’t do it. There wasn’t even a real reason for it. He just couldn’t say it.

“That’s alright, you don’t have to tell me.” She gave him a small smile. Much like Patton, she was far too understanding. She didn’t press him when he didn’t respond to her and changed the topic to see if he would talk about anything else. It was safe to say that she did most of the talking between them. “I called campus security. They said they would take care of it, but it’s totally up to you if you want to come forward or not.”

“I just don’t want to see him again,” Logan mumbled into his arms.

Dahlia looked as if someone kicked her puppy and ran away. “R-right. Well, I don’t know about anywhere else, but I know you’ll never see him here again. But if you decide to do anything about it, I’ll back you up.”

Logan didn’t know why a total stranger would “back him up” at all. There wasn’t any benefit for her. She didn’t even know his name. Maybe this was that human decency Patton talked about sometimes.

“Logan?”

Speak of the devil and he shall arrive.

Dahlia and Logan looked over to see Patton trekking over to them. His face was flushed as if he had been running around for some reason.

“Do you know him?” Dahlia asked in the same gentle tone that had yet to leave her, though it came out a bit protective. What was it about Logan that attracted protective people? Why did they feel a need to protect him? Could they sense how sad and pathetic he was?

Logan nodded.

“Are you safe around him?”

He nodded again.

“Do you want me to tell him what happened?”

After a slight hesitation, he nodded a final time.

Dahlia picked herself up and met Patton partway with determination on her features. Logan tried to act like the grass was the most important thing happening right now. He didn’t want to see how Patton would take the news.

Dahlia came back to him first. “Um, I’m gonna head out now. But, uh, here.” She handed him a slip of paper. “If you ever need help again. Or if you just want someone to talk to. Texting is preferable, but don’t ever hesitate to call.” She smiled at him, eyed Patton one last time, then left with her bag slung over her shoulder.

Logan looked down at the paper. Dahlia's scratchy writing stared back at him with overly neat numbers below her full name.

Patton took a seat beside him. He moved as if he didn’t want to startle a frightened animal. “You doing okay?”

“Fine.” Logan still couldn’t look at him.

“Did you know him?”

A little too well. “Just someone I met in class once.” Lying didn’t ease up any of the dread or the awful pit in his stomach.

Patton fell silent for a moment. “Do you want a hug?”

Logan looked up at him. He was genuine. Somehow appearing open for the hug despite not moving at all. “It’s alright.” He looked back down at the paper.

“I’m only going to ask again because I want a yes or no answer. If you say yes then that’s fine if you say no, that’s okay too. I’m not inconvenienced by either. I just want you to know that you have a say in this. You shouldn't have to worry about bothering me or giving me an answer you think I want to hear.” Somehow, Logan felt as if this was for more than a hug. “Give me an honest answer. So I’ll ask again, do you want a hug?”

Logan couldn’t bring himself to speak. Past instincts told him that wanting something from someone else wouldn’t lead to good things. He learned not to want so no one would be inconvenienced by him. But Patton wasn’t Percy. Patton was nice. Patton kept promises. Patton never hurt him. So instead of using his voice, Logan leaned into Patton’s side.

In response, Patton adjusted himself so that his arms could wrap around Logan. He didn’t say anything snarky. He didn’t complain about having to move. He just held Logan without a word.

Logan didn’t want to admit that he enjoyed it -- he didn’t need this sort of attention; it was a waste of time -- but he couldn’t deny the comfort that came with it. He felt safe. It was a silly thought, but he did feel safe. Like as long as he was in Patton’s arms then nothing could hurt him.

“I was scared when you called me,” Patton whispered. “I thought -- I don’t know -- I thought you were hurt or something. And I didn’t even think about it, I just rushed right over here.”

“Sorry.”

“Shh. None of that. I’m just glad I found you.” He placed a gentle kiss on top of Logan’s head. “Are you ready to head home now?”

“I still have class.”

“What?” Patton pulled himself away. Logan stopped a pitiful sound from leaving his throat. “You were still planning to go?” He looked confused and hurt. Maybe not hurt. But worried. The type of worried that leaves an ache in your chest.

“I wasn’t planning on skipping.” The slip of paper was still curled in his hand.

“Logan, you can’t act like nothing happened to you --” For a second, Logan’s blood ran cold. Until he realized that Patton meant about today -- “it’s not healthy to brush off something like this. You should go home. If there’s ever a day to miss school, it’s this day.”

“I don’t know...”

“Please.” Intentionally or not, Patton gave Logan his best puppy eyes. “I need -- I want -- it would make me feel better if you didn’t go. We could watch a movie or read or something. Whatever you want. Just as long as you go home and relax. You need it.”

Logan didn’t have the strength to argue. “Alright, I guess.”

Patton smiled. Full of relief. “Good. Let’s get you home, then.” He helped Logan to his feet.

“I suppose that means no date today.”

Patton intertwined his fingers with Logan. “You’re not leaving your apartment if that’s what you’re suggesting. Doesn’t mean we can’t make a date out of it. We’ll make cookies or something.”

“I thought you wanted me to relax.”

“Hey, I’m not that bad. I know how to turn on the oven.”

“Maybe we’ll just stick with a movie.”

#next one is gonna be a real mess #patton has a lot to answer for #sanders sides #logan sanders #patton sanders #logicality #past relationship abuse #relationship abuse tw #anxiety attack tw #berry done au

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another-blog-bites-the-dust · 5 years

Text

The one that got away.

Summary: After a stupid mistake, Roger realises that the best thing in his life was always going to be the one that got away.

Warnings: angst, mentions of cheating

A/N: Okay so this is a little different to what I usually do but I thought about giving it a try! The song behind the fic is 'The one that got away' by Katy Perry but if y'all would like me to do something like this again, you can send me some songs if you'd like to and I'll try and create a fic from them 😁 I hope you like it! Enjoy! 💖Bold italics are lyrics!

Summer after high school, when we first met

We make-out in your Mustang to Radiohead

And on my eighteenth birthday, we got matching tattoos

"My mum and dad are doing to kill me!" You laughed tracing your fingers over the jet black ink on your skin. "But I love it! I love it so much!" You grinned and faced Roger who was lovingly gazing at you from the drivers seat. He had parked in front of his house, his parents were out for the night and yours were out of town so you decided to spend the night together.

Roger leaned forward and captured his lips with yours, almost pressing you into the window. You gasped feeling his teeth sinking into your bottom lip. He pulled back with a soft gaze, his eyes flickering between your lips and eyes- it made your heart skip a beat seeing how innocent and impure he could be at the same time. "I love them too," he smiled. "Less painful than I thought..." he admired the little piece of art on his arm. "I could never love it as much as I love you though." He flashed a charming smile and you couldn't resist kissing him.

"I love you too, Rog." You murmured against his soft, warm lips.

The pair of you still had cling film wrapped around your biceps to keep the fresh tattoo protected. They were matching- almost identical. You had both got skulls but the crossbones on yours were a pair of drumsticks and on Roger's, they were film reel strips. An ode to one another and what you both wanted to do in the future. Roger gently squeezed your thigh before getting out the car and then opening your door for you like the gentleman he was. You linked your arm with the drummer as you approached his house. When you reached the door, he passionately kissed you and dragged you inside.

You had been with Roger for a while now, the two of you had a natural spark. You both knew what the two of you were feeling, thinking, wanting. And tonight the pair of you wanted each other.

Used to steal your parents liquor and climb to the roof

Talk about our future like we had a clue

Never planned that one day I'd be losing you

You kept your head on Roger's shoulder as you looked out to London illuminating the horizon in the distance while the two of you stargazed on the roof with an almost empty bottle of brandy. Roger had wrapped you up in one of his fuzzy dressing gowns, keeping you warm from the cool air. You had climbed up through the attic to see the breathtaking view. Underneath you had a pair of your sweats that you kept at Roger's house along with a few other bits of clothing but you were wearing one of his t-shirts, the one that hugged your frame just as well as he did when he held you. "I've got an audition next week," you announced.

Roger went wide eyed and had a huge grin on his face, his hair was sticking up a little thanks to the sweat he had manged to built up when he was having his way with you. "That's amazing! For a movie? Or tv show?"

"Movie," you smiled. "Something called 'Star Wars'. They haven't told me much about the role I'm up for but I'm looking forward to giving my all to try and bag the part."

"What's the part?" He asked, not taking his eyes off you.

"A princess, it sounds like a good role. I feel like I haven't had any luck lately trying to get roles...I often wondered if I was just throwing away my future pursuing this career." You looked up to Roger with a soft smile on your face "But then I look at you- how far you've come with the band and then I smile. And I'll know I'll always have you in my future somehow. As long as I have you, everything else falls into place." You laced your fingers between the gaps of his and gently squeezed his hand.

"You'll always be with me- either in person or the tattoo," he joked and you laughed. Roger wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pecked your temple. "But in all seriousness, I love you and I'll always be with you." You softly smiled and rested your forehead against his.

Neither of you had a clue what the future held but you were both less worried knowing the other person would be in it.

In another life, I would be your girl

We keep all our promises, be us against the world

In another life, I would make you stay

So I don't have to say you were the one that got away

The one that got away

"I'm so nervous, Rog," your hands were shaking as he drove you to the studio for your audition. "Thank you for taking me," you sweetly smiled. Roger reached across and squeezed your hand before bringing it to his lips while keeping a hand on the steering wheel.

"Not a problem, love." He pulled up outside the studios and you inhaled a deep breath. Roger turned to you "Don't be nervous- you've got this!" He gently cupped your cheeks "Believe me when I tell you this," he moved a little closer to you. "You will achieve anything if you face the challenge with a smile and an open mind and an open heart." He pressed his lips to yours and looked deeply into your eyes, his thumbs brushing over your cheekbones. "Always keep your heart open- even when you're scared it might hurt." You blinked away the tears welling in your eyes and nodded at his words. "Go knock em' dead, Y/N."

Roger gave you a kiss good luck before he watched you skip into the building with a grin on his face. He swallowed hard however when he rubbed his sweaty palms over his jeans and his fingers hit against the little box in his pocket.

He only hoped you would say yes.

I was June and you were my Johnny Cash

Never one without the other, we made a pact

Sometimes when I miss you, I put those records on, whoa

You lay next to him later that night wearing nothing but the sparkling engagement ring on your finger. Roger kept rubbing his fingers over it, making sure that he was living in the real life and not a fantasy. You had said yes. You were going to be his wife. "So..." he began with a growing smirk "Do I have to refer to you as Princess Leia now or...?" He trailed off and you giggled, snuggling closer to him.

"Soon-to-be Mrs. Taylor will do just fine," you playfully retorted. You gently brushed away the stray hairs on Roger's face "You're the most beautiful human being on this planet," you whispered and softly kissed him while he blushed.

"I get inspiration from you..." he flirtatiously murmured and you laughed into his shoulder, the sensation of your hair on his sensitive skin made him smile. It felt so pure and so natural.

Your smile soon disappeared when you were reminded of the inevitable when your eyes flickered up to his drumsticks that were laying on the table in the bedroom you both shared. "I'm going to miss you when you're on tour," you felt a little deflated knowing you weren't going to be seeing him for the best part of a year.

"I'll be back before you know it," he reassuringly smiled "Plus you'll be too busy being a badass space princess to notice that I'm gone!" Roger winked and then touched your ring again. "Will you promise me you'll always keep this on?" He asked in a whisper.

"Always. I promise."

Six months later you were surrounded by newspapers with Roger's face plastered over it while in your dressing room. You had just finished your final scenes and were supposed to be feeling elated and full of joy but you felt nothing by anger and pain. On most of the papers you could barely see Roger's face as he was too busy smashing it up against a girl with bright red hair. He didn't kiss you like that. With tears welling in your eyes, you slowly removed the ring. But a promise was a promise and you kept it on you- only you kept it in a place where you could easily keep it hidden from everyone if you wanted to. Around your neck on a chain. Right now it felt like a noose.

Even though he did what he did, you still had a special place in your heart reserved for Roger. You would always have it.

Roger arrived back to a house that only felt like half a home. Everything that belonged to you was gone. He had stupidly kissed a groupie he could barely remember the name of and had let you slip right out between the gaps of his fingers. He knew it was his fault. He knew you would always be the one that got away.

Someone said you had your tattoo removed

Saw you downtown, singing the blues

It's time to face the music, I'm no longer your muse

You walked passed the large crowds of people screaming your name as cameras flashed with a smile on your face. A year later you were at a party in London. The club was warm but there was a little patch on your chest that always remained cold- where the cool metal of the ring rested against your skin.

You then heard more screams when a band came on stage, you looked up and saw Roger under a spotlight. He was wearing a top that exposed his muscular arms and you could just make out the blisters on his arm where the tattoo used to be. Roger knew that a faint outline would always remain no matter how much he had the laser removal machine try to burn it off. A painful reminder of what he once had and lost.

You kept yours- you knew it was no use running from the past. The past helped shape you as a person. It shaped you both. You decided to leave, he didn't spot you in the crowd- or so you thought.

In fact, all he could see was you. But then you disappeared into thin air. Roger decided to play something a little different, just for you. He even dedicated it to you, fully knowing that you were already gone. "This next song is for the girl that got away," he sadly announced and began banging on his drums.

In another life, I would be your girl

We keep all our promises, be us against the world

In another life, I would make you stay

So I don't have to say you were the one that got away

The one that got away

You both watched each other blossom and flourish in life from afar. You found out a lot from talking to Freddie, Brian and John and then the rest from newspapers and various magazines- most of it was tabloid garbage though. Roger read the Oscar nominations that were in the paper one night in 1984- you had been nominated. "Your dream came true," he whispered with a small smile with tears welling his eyes as he brushed his fingertips over your name, a tear of his falling on your smiling face.

Your real dream hadn't come true- it was likely it would never.

The dream was still hanging around your neck.

You had won the Oscar that year and had also bagged a husband a few years after. Roger eventually got married and that crushed you. The hole in your heart caused by him was filled by your new love and co-star Harrison whom you met on Star Wars. He was very different to Roger but he made you happy and understood what you went through in the industry better than anyone.

But there was still a crack in your heart that was caused and being kept jammed open by Roger. A piece of you felt guilty for still loving him- especially when you had married such a wonderful man. Harrison had questioned the ring on your neck but you had told him that it was just a piece of jewellery that was a little too big for your finger but you still liked wearing it- you claimed the necklace was a compromise. He also questioned your tattoo- you told him you were blackout drunk when you got it. You were, only you were blackout drunk on love rather than alcohol.

The one, the one, the one

The one that got away

You were on the carpet on the Golden Globes years later with Harrison by your side. You were up for a special recognition award for all your work. A reporter called you over to ask a few questions. "Congratulations on your award tonight, Y/N- this will be your seventh Golden Globe!" He gushed.

"Thank you so much! I can't quite believe I'm receiving the award!" You bashfully admitted.

"Now, you really started your career in one of the biggest movie franchises of all time- do you remember your humble beginnings?" The reporter asked.

You were transported back to Roger's car, his lips on your hand and those words of advice he gave you before you went in and got the part. You nodded and tightly smiled, trying to not focus on the twang of pain in your heart. "I do. Very well." Your hand found itself holding the ring on the necklace. It was on show tonight thanks to the low décolleté on your dress that exposed your neck and a little of your chest.

"Now a little birdie told me that you knew Queen back in the day," he slyly grinned and you felt like your heart was being placed in a vice and slowly being crushed. "Have you seen 'Bohemian Rhapsody?'"

"Yes I have," you smiled, keeping relaxed demeanour. "Rami's portrayal of Freddie is incredible- he did him proud and I wish him well tonight!"

"Yes! The first of many nominations I think!" The reporter grinned "Brian May and Roger Taylor are here," your smile dropped a little hearing his name. "Will you have a good ol' catch up with them?" The reporter asked, wiggling his eyebrows slightly. Your relationship with Roger was unknown to the media and most of the world. You kept it between yourselves and your close friends.

"If I get the chance," you forced a tight smile "Thank you!" You waved and walked off, your hands were trembling and your heart began to beat a little bit faster. After years being apart you were finally going to be put in the same room with one another. You took your seat at the table, Harrison sat beside you and reassuringly squeezed your hand. He thought you were nervous about making your speech but really you were nervous about potentially seeing Roger again.

Roger sat down at the table beside Brian and Rami, making general chit chat with everyone at the table. His eyes glanced up for a moment and at that same time your eyes locked onto his. The pair of you just stared at each other for the longest amount of time, neither of you knew what to do. Somehow you both looked the same but so different at the same time. You thought it was the eyes- they were the exact same pair you loved looking into, only with a few wrinkles around them. It felt like it was only the two of you in the room- even in the world- at that moment in time. He thought you were just as beautiful as the day he first met you. Roger's eyes flickered down when he saw something shining in the light. He felt himself gasp and Brian asked him what was wrong. Only nothing was wrong- he was just shocked that you had kept your promise after all these years.

All this money can't buy me a time machine, no

Can't replace you with a million rings, no

I should'a told you what you meant to me, whoa

Cause now I pay the price

You swallowed hard and managed to smile, Roger returned it after a few seconds. You turned and talked with someone next to you, subconsciously reaching up and nervously playing with your necklace- Roger noticed you doing it. When you reached your arm up to do so, he caught a glimpse of your- now slightly faded- tattoo. His was still on his bicep- albeit very faint remnants of it where the laser removal failed to burn it off. A part of him was happy that it didn't.

When they called your name, Roger was the first one to rise to his feet and clap for you. You smiled and thanked them all with a wave and a smile, you spotted Roger and Brian and sent them a small grin. Especially to Roger.

You held on to your award with one hand while unfolding a small sheet of paper with the other and began reading from it. "Firstly, I'm so unbelievably thankful to everyone that has helped me reach this stage in my life. I honestly can't believe it!" You nervously laughed and then looked down at the piece of paper you had wrote your speech on and then your eyes flickered up to Roger. You then folded over the sheet subtlety, deciding to speak from the heart instead. "Sometimes I often wonder what I'd be up to in another life. I wonder if I'd ever become an actress...I wonder if things would have worked out in the end and turn out the way I always imagined them to. The way I dream they'd be." Your eyes were locked on Roger and he was looking at you. He knew what you were really talking about. "You never really know what the future holds." You softly admitted before clearing your throat and smiling to try and break the serious tension you had created. "I certainly didn't think I'd be holding another Golden Globe!" You laughed and everyone joined in. You looked at your award and fondly smiled, remembering his advice. "I guess that in this life- and in any life- you will achieve anything if you face the challenge with a smile and an open mind and an open heart. Always keep your heart open- even when you're scared it might hurt." You wiped away a tear with the back of your hand and looked around the whole room, finally breaking your eye contact from Roger. They were all welling up at your words. Especially the drummer. "Thank you!"

Roger managed to catch you after the award show had finished in one of the rooms where other winners and actors had gathered. "Hi, Y/N." You softly smiled at him. "Congratulations," he leaned forward and quickly kissed your cheek. Your skin still remembered those lips well and your eyes shut feeling the contact of his skin against yours.

"Thank you, Rog. Congratulations to you and everyone on BoRhap too!" You grinned "Freddie would have been so proud." You swallowed away the lump in your throat. "It's good to see you." You honestly admitted.

Roger had his eyes on the ring he had once slipped on your finger but was now around your neck. "You kept your tattoo," he chortled when he saw it up close before turning serious. "And you kept your promise..." he whispered.

"When I said always, I meant it." You said in a low voice. "If you want it back, I can -"

He quickly cut off your ridiculous statement "No! No! It's yours!" He looked at you with a soft gaze. "Always."

In another life, I would be your girl

We keep all our promises, be us against the world

In another life, I would make you stay

So I don't have to say you were the one that got away

You jumped slightly feeling Harrison place his hands on your waist. "We've got to get going," he looked down at you, flashing a grin. "The car is waiting."

"Oh, course," you looked at him with a smile that didn't quite reach your eyes. "I'll get you there!" He kissed your lips and then shook Roger's hand hello and then goodbye in the few shakes. You turned to your former love, the ring on your necklace felt ten times heavier than usual. "It was good seeing you, congratulations again on the nominations and wins." Roger took your hands in his and gently squeezed them before leaning in and pressing a long, soft kiss to your cheek. Tears began to sting both your eyes. "Goodbye, Roger," you softly spoke when he pulled back, his face still close to yours.

"Maybe in another life I wasn't so stupid," he whispered and then let you go. It was agonising for him to let your hands slip out of his. "I'm sorry."

You nodded "I know you're sorry." You glanced to your feet for a moment before gazing into Roger's glossy eyes with your own tearful ones. "But is it bad that a part of me wishes I was living in that life sometimes?" You whispered so only he could hear before walking away. You glanced over your shoulder at Roger to take one last look at him up close.

"I don't think it's a bad thing..." He mumbled to himself. Roger sighed because a part of him wanted to be in that life too. A life where he still had you. But that was just a fantasy.

The one that got away

————–—–—————–

Tags- (Tag list is open! Just let me know if you want to be tagged or not!)

@rrrogah-tayluhh @rogerofmylife @phantom-fangirl-stuff @pyrotechnic789 @deacytits @mercurys-bike @happy-at-home @mhftrs @dannydelay @queenismylifenow @whitequeen-blackqueen @stateofloveandvedder @blondyfel @mespetitestortues @trickster-may @xtrashmammalstefx @the-garnet-rain @makapaka11 @killerqueenbucky

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todisturbtheuniverse · 5 years

Text

FIC: Last Year’s Language

Rating: T Fandom: Stardew Valley Pairing: Shane/Female Farmer Tags: Pre-Relationship, Friendship, Pining, Fluff Word Count: 3000 Summary: Shane and Lydia spend a quiet New Year's Eve at the farmhouse, which leaves Shane a lot of room to ruminate. Post-eight heart event, pre-relationship. Also on AO3.

Sometimes, Shane thought, it seemed as if Lydia had decided to skip straight past friendship and right on to old married couple, disgustingly comfortable with one another.

Not that they were...not that she would...there was no point in even ruminating on the subject, even though ruminating was probably the only thing he did well. Turning thoughts and ideas over and over and over in his mind until they'd turned into something monstrous and horrifying: his specialty.

This was different. This, he wished he could turn into something shiny and good. But he was incapable of that, so it was better that he left it alone entirely.

He tried to, anyway. Despite that silent vow, he still found it—her—in his thoughts more often than not. It wasn’t the first, or the last, or the only way his brain had betrayed him, so he tolerated this behavior and hoped that it would pass, just like everything else.

But. He was supposed to be trying to be kinder to himself. (His therapist said that this was really being “fair” to himself. He disagreed. They compromised on “kind.”) And if he was being kinder to himself, then he had to admit that the situations he kept putting himself in did not really make it easy to forget how he felt about her. Or how the chemicals in his brain thought they felt about her, at least.

Now that—that wasn't fair. Not to him, but to Lydia. Of course he liked her. He could hardly believe that there were people in Pelican Town who didn't—but they existed, supposedly. He steered clear of them.

If only he could stop there, with liking her, and be satisfied.

Lydia picked up a card from the draw pile, tucking it into the middle of her hand, the way she did with every card she picked up. She studied it a long time, her brow furrowed in concentration, and then lifted the whole fan of cards to conceal her mouth. It was no use; he heard her jaw crack all the way across the table from the strength of the yawn. Farmers were not meant to stay up so late—not even on New Year’s Eve. Didn’t matter that winter was still desperately hanging on, that nothing was growing on Northern Lights Farm; she always found a way to occupy herself. Judging by the bruise on the hand holding the cards, she’d probably been back to the mines today.

“We can pretend we made it to midnight,” he offered.

She glared over her cards at him, her eyes bloodshot. “You just want to get out with your dignity intact.” She tapped the pad of paper where she was keeping score.

“I’m behind by more than a hundred points, last I checked,” he said dryly. “As usual, there's no escaping with my dignity.”

The cards lowered a little, enough for him to see her brief smile—quickly overcome by another yawn. “You could still come back,” she said, jumping from mild trash talk to encouragement instantly. “We’ve got twenty-seven minutes. A lot can change in twenty-seven minutes.”

He rolled his eyes; she discarded another card. His turn. He picked up the card she’d dropped, inspecting it against his hand. Two of hearts. Enough to complete his Ace-Two-Three-Four run, and with a couple of other three of a kinds…

He laid down his cards, surprised at his good luck. “Gin.”

“Fuck,” she sighed, laying down her cards, too, and began to count up what she owed him, pencil in hand. He'd caught her with a couple of face cards unaccounted for. “See? I told you.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

She penciled in the new scores, elbow on the table, chin in hand, while he gathered up the cards and began to shuffle, watching her out of the corner of his eye. There was a big get-together at the Stardrop tonight, but Lydia had opted out, despite half a dozen separate invitations. She could have been toasting with the rest of the town right now; most of them liked her pretty well, after all, a few idiots notwithstanding.

But instead, she was here. She'd invited him and Jas over, promised hot drinks and a towering stack of brownies and entertainment. And he'd been too selfish to turn her down, even though she'd have been better off mingling, drinking with all the people who could still drink without nearly killing themselves. She probably wished she was there.

No. No, that was last year's language. Lydia didn't do anything she didn't want to do. He knew that.

Even though he was sure that this was boring. That he was boring. She had to be bored.

She yawned again, proving his point.

"Sorry," she said, her eyes drooping a little. "I shouldn't have gone to the mines today."

He glanced at the bruise on her hand again. It wasn't about him, as usual; he was blowing things out of proportion, as usual.

"That's nothing to worry about, right?" he asked, nodding at the hand.

She held it out in front of her while he dealt the cards, frowning, turning it this way and that. "Nah. I've had worse."

His stomach twisted. The memory of that night—it hadn't been so long ago, just earlier this winter—made his blood run cold. His mind, which had always been more his enemy than anything else, sometimes reminded him of it at moments when he was otherwise just fine: the strange huddled shape she'd made on her porch, the snow caught in her eyelashes, the blood dried on her face—

"I'm okay," her voice said, quiet, and he snapped back to the present to find himself holding the deck, both their hands dealt. Hastily, he put the stack of cards down between them.

"Yeah, I know," he said, picking up his hand.

When he glanced up again, checking to see if she'd picked up a card, she was watching him; her hazel eyes were murky in the firelight, her teeth worried at her lower lip, and his stomach twisted in an entirely different—almost entirely pleasant—way.

"I'm careful," she said. "I promise. Way more careful than I was that night."

"I know," he said again, and then, "I'll just feel better when you're back to swearing at the sprinklers, is all."

She laughed; her eyes twinkled. "It's nice of you to worry about me," she said, teasing, and finally gathered up her cards to take a look at them.

"I do," he said. It was important for her to know that, he thought. That she wasn't the one doing all the worrying. "Worry about you. But I know you can take care of yourself."

She wasn't laughing anymore; her features had fallen into more serious lines. He should have let it go, should have let her make her joke and brush it off.

"To be honest with you, I...I'll feel better when I'm back to swearing at the sprinklers, too. It's an adventure down there, but…" She trailed off, eyes wandering her cards, frowning.

“But?” he prompted.

She shook her head, gave a quick shrug. “I don’t know. It gets lonely.”

Strange. Somehow, he had a hard time imagining that Lydia ever got lonely. He could arrive at the farm any time of the day or night, and she would be in the middle of some task—swearing at the sprinklers, her hands full of a piece of lumpy knitting, four pots and pans on the stove with something delicious simmering inside. Sometimes just lying sprawled out on the grass with her dog half on top of her, talking to him like he was a person.

She always seemed so occupied, like her life alone was so rich and full. His life alone had never felt like that.

But she hadn't said, “It gets scary,” or “it gets cold,” or “it gets bloody.” Lonely. In a dangerous mine full of dangerous creatures, she got lonely.

It seemed like an invitation, somehow. Or maybe a question she couldn't bring herself to ask. He knew all about those.

“If you want company,” he said, before he could second-guess himself, “just ask, okay?”

She looked up; her mouth opened, just slightly, then closed again. For a long moment, she considered him instead of her cards, as if weighing his hardiness against rock crabs and enraged bats and all the varieties of slimes.

“Really?” she asked, and though his instinct was to interpret this as judgmental, as dubious, he heard something else entirely in her voice, something even he couldn't miss. Hope. Relief.

“Yeah,” he said. “I mean, as long as I’m not working, or busy with Jas…" That was a lot of caveats, but he had to pay attention to his responsibilities; she understood. "I can come with you whenever. Really.”

She smiled, a slow, liquid thing entirely unlike her usual quick grins, and his heart made an astonishing effort to break through his ribcage and throw itself at her feet.

He was doing a great job stifling that crush. Really, really great. It would evaporate any day now.

“I would like that,” she said. “Next Saturday, maybe?”

He nodded, afraid of what might come out of his mouth next if he didn’t keep it firmly shut, and they returned to their card game. She stayed quiet this time, but whenever she lowered her cards and exposed her face he saw that smile, firmly entrenched, and thought, I did that, somehow. His brain was already feverishly working on how to achieve a repeat performance.

She won, of course, but the margin was narrower than he’d thought it would end up being. He could read that in all kinds of nasty ways. An omen that he would always fall a little short no matter how hard he tried, maybe. But he tried to think of a kinder way to interpret it, instead. Like he was catching up, slowly but surely.

Instead of turning on the TV, they watched the clock on her mantle, the tarnished golden second hand creeping steadily closer to midnight—and then, in an instant, it passed through the peeling XII.

"Well, that's that," Lydia said matter-of-factly.

He drained the last of his cider. “I should probably get going.”

She yawned, so wide that he feared for her jaw. “Need help with Jas?” she asked, even though it was clear how hard she was fighting to stay awake; she wouldn’t make the minute walk to the truck, let alone the twenty-minute walk back from the ranch.

“I'm pretty sure I can get her to the car.”

Lydia pushed back from the table and stretched, arms reaching out above her head, and he made himself look away, pushed back from the table himself and went to collect Jas from beneath the pile of blankets in Lydia's room. In the semi-darkness, he didn't even give himself permission to look around; it felt too much like spying on her, like an intrusion.

Jas, he'd learned early on in their life together, was a light sleeper. He focused entirely on peeling back the blankets without waking her up. No sooner had he set aside the second one, though, than her eyes opened, glinting in the low light.

"What time is it?" she asked, her voice still slurred from sleep.

"Little after midnight. Time to go home."

Her face scrunched up in a devastated scowl. "I missed it," she lamented, wide-awake in an instant, throwing back the rest of the blankets and nearly burying Shane beneath them. "You should've woken me up!"

He was too old and tired to feel anything in particular at the passing of the hand of the clock over midnight, but with a suddenness that winded him, he remembered being a kid, imagining some magic in it all, that this year would be the year, and he was seeing it right from the beginning.

It had all been bullshit, obviously, but it didn’t have to be for Jas.

He managed to evict himself from all the quilts. “Sorry, kiddo,” he said, and meant it. “Next year I’ll wake you up, okay?”

With a huff, she threw herself out of the bed and flounced into the main room. Shane made it to the doorway just in time to see Jas slam the front door behind her, not even acknowledging Lydia.

“Ouch,” Lydia said, laying a hand over her heart.

“Yeah, we’ve really offended her,” he said, frustrated. "Sorry. She's not usually like that. Even when I screw up."

"Hey. Don't say that. You didn't know."

He shrugged, helplessly, and saw Lydia's eyes narrow in calculation despite her exhaustion.

"I think she’ll forgive us," she declared. "Especially if you take some of these home with you.” She pointed out the stack of brownies. “I’ll pack them up.”

He would have protested, except that he understood very well by now, after nearly a year of knowing her, that little else in the world gave her more pleasure than foisting food off on people. He therefore endured the brownie acquisition process in silence.

“Thanks for having us,” he said, the tupperware container of brownies in hand, standing in the open door.

“Thanks for coming,” she said, and then, her face more serious, “hey. I know you hate talking about this stuff, but I just wanted to say—it’s been a good year for you, you know? You’ve done some incredible things.”

He had his own opinions on what things qualified as incredible, but he didn’t like making Lydia look like she’d just watched him kick a puppy, so he kept his mouth shut.

“And my year’s been pretty great, too,” she said, in a smaller voice. Her eyes fell from his face to study his shoes. “In no small part thanks to you, so...thanks.”

Quickly—so quickly he wasn’t entirely sure what her intention was, and so he stood there, frozen in place—she stepped closer and hugged him, arms looping up around his shoulders. Maybe this was an instinctive human thing that he hadn’t missed out on, because it only took a heartbeat for him to react, one arm wrapping around her, the other hand holding the brownies aloft.

For a moment, all attempts to stifle whatever this was failed. He held her, and she didn't pull away; she pressed closer. There was a nice, clean scent to her hair—he'd caught brief hints of it before, but now he realized there was a sweet, flowery aroma beneath, simple, like the wildflowers that grew rampant on the land she hadn't had time to cultivate yet in warmer weather.

For a moment, he let himself want exactly what he wanted. To imagine not going home, after all.

But only for a moment.

He convinced himself to loosen the arm that was around her, to begin to pull away. They were still safely in the territory of normal friend stuff. Hugs on special occasions. Awkward, but nice, sentiments. In limited capacity this was all completely, totally normal.

But as he pulled back, she turned her head. Her lips brushed his cheek, a touch so soft and light that he would later half-convince himself he'd imagined it. Only then did she let him go.

In his opinion, that stretched the boundaries of normal a bit.

“Happy New Year,” she said, her voice soft, and automatically he stepped back, clearing the doorway, his mind too jumbled to produce any coherent words. She began to shut the door.

“Hey,” he said, the word struggling through his throat, which seemed to have attempted to close entirely.

He’d said nothing, absolutely nothing, and some reciprocation was probably warranted, right? Normal? She paused, door still half-open, waiting, and he cast around frantically for words that would actually match, that would actually mean anything. Not his strong suit.

“It was thanks to you,” he said, finally. “You know that, right? You stuck your neck out for me when...I mean. I was an asshole to you.”

She raised one eyebrow. That smile was still there, somehow. What were the parameters for it? He had no idea.

“It was worth it,” she said, and shut the door.

He stood there, still stunned, for a good ten seconds; and then, remembering Jas, he trotted over to the truck.

He couldn't ruminate on any of that. The last sixty seconds were strictly off-limits for rumination. Not for fear that he'd tarnish them—or maybe, yes, actually, he could very well tarnish them. By believing that any of it had meant more than it did.

He expected to find Jas sulking in the passenger seat, but instead she was upright and alert as he climbed up to the driver’s side, brownies in hand. He set them down before he could drop them and searched his pockets for the keys, a little unnerved by how closely she was watching him.

“Can I ask you something?” Jas said.

“Yeah, of course,” he said, expecting her to bargain for a brownie somehow.

“Do you like her?”

He paused in the act of shoving the keys in the ignition. “Who, Lydia?”

Jas sighed impatiently and crossed her arms over her chest. “No, Buttons,” she said sarcastically, naming Lydia’s first cow. “Of course, Lydia.”

“Well, yeah. We’re friends.”

She gave him a look, a look that seemed way too sharp for a seven-year-old. “That’s it?” she pressed.

“Yeah,” he said, even though his stomach tied itself in another knot around the lie. “That’s it. Why?”

“I just really like Lydia, too,” she said, wiggling deeper into her seat. “That’s all.”

She was definitely hinting at something, but he wasn’t about to take that bait. “Yeah? That why you didn’t even say goodbye to her?”

Guilt flashed over her face. “Is she mad?” she asked worriedly.

“No, but it probably wouldn’t hurt to say you’re sorry next time you see her.”

She nodded, clearly relieved, and lapsed into silence. He knew better than to think the topic was forgotten, but for now, she seemed willing to drop it. Someday, though...maybe she wouldn’t be.

He wasn’t sure what he was going to do then.

#stardew valley #sdv shane #stardew valley shane #sdv farmer #shane/farmer #universe writes #friendship #fluff #pining #pre-relationship #and Some Angst #per usual

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nctaezen · 3 years

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Happy valentine day aka both the lovey dovey holiday and our bday bpy himself, I saw your gifset and 100/10!! Amazing work, please frame that gifset in a museum pronto!! It sounds like your valentine's day was fun ^_^

But yes I am from Chicago haha, it doesn't seem fancy to me being in Chicago with how expensive downtown can be at times (but then again, when is downtown in ANY big city not expensive?) But it is a lovely place nonetheless, granted don't come now because its cold like the northpole xD but very much recommended the spring time personally! I do hope you have the chance to come to Chicago when things calm down

Ooohh same lol, I can do my nails like a pro but eyeliner ??? I struggle lol. I watched videos on tips but I still can't figure how to not stop my hand from shaking =/ (if any of your followers know a trick do share! Help this noob anon out, i will pay with cookies!) I can do it decent line but its always thick for some odd reason lol. It starts off good in the beginning with a nice thin line but then I go full raccoon mode xD I have big eyes as well so technically not good for my eye shape but it is what it is haha. I do prefer pencil since its easier but I do enjoy the liquid eyeliner look. My current makeup look is eyeliner, mascara and some lip product. I do eyeshadow if I want to be fancy haha but for sure need to look into getting some better products. The ones I do have my eye on are nyx because we love a good mix of free of animal products and cheap, bare minerals is nice as well as well as color pop! For the pricier end fenty and rare beauty are on my list (especially rare omg the lipstick shades are so, so pretty! Especially the color you mentioned ^0^) but ooh we love pinks and orange shades! We love the soft, spring romantic vibes! For me. I like a bit of everything but i do find myself leaning into red, pink, orange shades with a mix of dark tones like a dark wine shade or even black djaksja. My favorite lippie i own is this beautiful orange/brown color? Idk if that is the right way to describe it but it is a pretty color! Jdkandks @ that large lipstick collection, respect haha. I enjoy the old school lip gloss look because i like pretending to feel like an Bratz doll lol.. bb creams are good and I may go with one in the future since it seems a good product to use if you don't want to dive into foundation and such c:

Now skin care wise, I agree! Not all pricey products are better. You can find good products for half the price that works for your skin! It is a trail and error sadly but eventually you will find something that works best for you c: and ooohh i think i have heard of those brands! I'll look at them later to see what they have so thank you for the suggestion!! Lol maybe that's a good thing the brand isn't around where you live xD but true, it is best to not continue with using the products so I will sadly throw them away. I feel bad since I did spend money but if it isn't doing me good skin wise well why ruin my skin more? Garnier is great for sure! I love their micellar water so I may invest in some of their other products! When I will do that, not sure because my parents are a bit strict when it comes to makeup/skin care stuff *sigh*

Oof I do feel like there have been alot of romance plots so we do need a break with some other plot ideas like a good mystery drama for example like let me feel like Sherlock when watching the episodes haha. But ahh it be like that xD sometimes you start off watching a video or two and then you are spending half the night watching funny edits of nct lol and idk how he can be calm like jaehyun is so calm in the most chaotic moments. Like he didn't even flinch when the boxes exploded in nct world!! Teach us your calm ways jaehyun. But I do love his dad ways from the humor he has or his dad sneeze (I will admit some fans do take the "jaehyun dad" narrative a bit too far sometimes or maybe its just me? Thoughts love?)

Oof until april!? Oh no D: I hope the numbers slow down during then, sending good vibes to your family as well during these times! You also stay safe! As for me, yeah just have been staying inside. Not much to do sadly but I'm being well fed with kpop so not complaining haha

Hey hey! How was your week/days so far since Valentines?

Well I had a lot to do and I was mainly busy with work (once again). I am remodelling/redecorating my room as well and I still have lots of plans on it, let’s see how the things end up because I will do it all alone (wish me luck).

Happy you loved that set and I hope you will anticipate my Ten set as well (it’s a secret, not secret anymore but I still haven’t started with it yet I have lots of notes and ideas saved, I just need the courage and time for it).

Oh yeah I knew it hehe as far as I know Chicago looks very modern and seems a bit luxurious, indeed should be a bit expensive in the downtown, but even in my country, downtown is something I usually avoid for hanging out because it’s super super pricy.

I came across a few fun videos on tiktok and there was a girl doing her eyeliner in one go, like less that 1 second and I was like?? she’s not from this world. I had the chance to try my new bb cream and corrector from nyx and so far I love it, it doesn’t feel heavy or itchy on my skin, also knowing it’s cruelty free, it’s something that stands on my top buy makeup brand list. I used to love lipgloss when I was a child/teen, but not anymore, I wear my hair down and if go out. Forget about it, especially since I live in a windy area. And now with masks I can only wear a no-transfer lipstick or simply lip balm. A brand I think I will try soon will be Cerave, I heard only good things about it and Wayv also promoted it in the past. At that time the brand wasn’t available in my country, now it become quite popular and if the lockdown ends next month, I’ll go to a pharmacy to test the products and (hopefully) buy some.

As for my drama experience, I started to watch Vincenzo since it’s on Netflix it’s much easier to watch but I didn’t expect the whole comedy twist, I thought that drama was based on a dark-crime-mafia plot, yet I was once again fooled by the trailers. Anyway he looks sooo good for his age, I thought he was in his twenties, just wow! We’re a decade apart, and man! he looks so young, maybe even younger, insane! I should drink more ginseng tea for infinite youth haha Anyway the drama is a stay because I love him so much, he is a very talented actor and hopefully the plot will change as the history will go on.

About Jaehyun and that dad narrative, well yes. Things go out of hand for everyone else not only for him, especially in cases when these words are shoved right into their faces, I would never dare to comment anything like that under their social media or even on personal-interactions, it just seems uncomfortable on many levels. If someone looks hot and sexy, this is what he is and this is what we call them for, magazines and articles describe idols a lot these days with these words and that is ok because it means they have an attractive image that everyone wishes to have or achieve, yes I do get jealous sometimes even if they are men so 😂 but those type of whatever role-playing words, no, niet, nein, não, non. Out of question.

Meanwhile a few comebacks happened and I was excited for it, Shinee’s title song is sooo good and I love the savage lyrics. The rest of the album is also amazing, I have like 3 top favorites. Now I am waiting for Wayv comeback that will happen soon, hope SM won’t disappoint with another low-budget MV, I know we are in a pandemic situation rn but even inside the box, a MV can look stunning. SM take notes from “Make a Wish”, that was simply beautiful and almost everything was shot indoor, stunning effects I want to see again.

And I don’t think I had the chance to ask you, how did you like 127′s Japanese album? I love all the songs and there is non I skip when I play the whole album. I love how different hits from their Korean albums, there is something alluring about it, well the lyrics also suggest that so- I couldn’t miss that huge album that looks like an A3 portfolio so I already ordered one, hopefully by the end of the March I’ll get my hands on it, I can’t wait because the pictures are simply stunning!

Hope so far you have been fine, stay healthy and take care of yourself, and hope to hear from you back soon ❤️

#anon #glitch anon #reply

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