#his relationship with ali lasted only one semester

[rehfan]

La Belle Dame avec Merci - Chapter 2: Keeping Up Appearances

Eddie Munson x Unpopular!AFAB!fem!Reader

Warnings: 18+ readers only please - minor children DNI! – No Upsidedown; SLOW BURN; Eddie & Reader are both over 18; fake dating/relationship; reader is technically a virgin; mutual pining; Eddie has trust issues; emotional hurt/comfort; masturbation; emotional manipulation; reader is kinda shitty to Eddie; reader gets better; angst; more angst; Eddie’s mom is dead; small act of accidental physical violence; Uncle Wayne is the best

Tagged: @bluestuesday / @ali-r3n / @winchester-angel / @iletmytittiestitty-russ / <— let me know if you want to be added!!

DO NOT POST TO ANY OTHER SITE. My words are mine and mine alone.

Inspired by @/hard-candy-writing ‘s ORIGINAL POST — I sincerely hope I do this justice.

Chapter 1 Tumblr Link -- AO3 LINK — Masterlist link

Eddie was still in a state of shock until the second bell rang and he was officially late for English class. He crept in and sat near the back, your kiss still tingling on his lips, your thighs still in his hands, the weight of you in his lap causing other things to wake up. His knee thrummed under the desk and he could barely pay attention to the creative writing assignment that Mr. Hutchinson was talking about. It was all he could do to try and think of serious things to calm his dick down: accidentally slamming his fingers in the van door, Wayne chewing him out about cigarette burns in the carpet, things like that. The last thing he wanted was to pop a boner during class.

Please, dear God, not here.

The next campaign, buying more guitar strings for Sweetheart, slamming his fingers in the van’s door - again. Any thought he could manage that had nothing to do with the taste of your watermelon Chapstick would be a good thing right now. Because he should definitely not be focusing on how you smelled and whether that was your shampoo or your soap or a perfume you used. Yep. For sure should not be dwelling on what underwear you had on underneath that prim skirt with the slit all the way up it.

Fuck.

He was going to see you again in biology. That was in forty-five minutes. Would you want to sit in his lap again? How could you? You were whole lab tables apart from one another. There was no way to move seats without it being a big deal. Jeff would feel abandoned and who was it? Gail? Gail who shared the lab table with you would probably be put out. But then, he may not even have to worry. It was highly likely that you’d freeze him out. After all, that little display was just improv for the party/jock crowd in the library. He wasn’t stupid. He knew the score.

Sighing deeply, he decided to write a story about an errant knight who had been seduced and charmed and then completely dumped by some woodland fairy.

Was he really going to allow you to run the show, though? To push him this way and that just to satisfy your own strategies? He didn’t want to be used. Not like his uncle’s last girlfriend had used Wayne. Not like his father had used his mother.

He changed the ending of his story. The knight was under a spell. It was broken when he saw her true reflection in the water of the lake. That wasn’t a woodland fairy. That was a witch who wanted him as a blood sacrifice. He threw her in the water and she fizzled, melted, and drowned, screaming in agony. He’d be damned if some deceitful witch was going to get the best of him, no matter how attractive.

~080~

Meanwhile, you sat in your French class, your head swimming with thoughts of brown eyes and curly hair. The scent of him clung to the edges of your brain, a blend of smoke and spice, mixed with the smell of his shampoo.

Well this was inconvenient. You really needed to pass Madame’s pop quiz or you’d ruin your perfect A grade for the semester so far. 90 percent or better or you were a loser. No compromise. You tried your damnedest to focus on the correct past tense conjugation of rêver without focusing on its ironic meaning; all your brain wanted to do was dream.

Those brown eyes… you had never in your life gone for a guy with dark eyes. You had always been a sucker for crystalline blue eyes and maybe some dark lashes, like Brian Bloom has or blond with blue-eyes like John Schneider. Eddie Munson was unlike either man. Not that you were holding your breath about meeting either Brian or John in your lifetime. But Eddie was just SO NOT your type and his sudden presence in your awareness was jarring.

What the hell had you done?

You finished your quiz, but re-read it just in case. Walking it to the front to drop it on the teacher’s desk only to sit back down and sigh, you felt every inch the tragic figure just waiting for class to end. You had probably fucked yourself over. There were only ten questions. You knew you probably screwed up more than one. Boys were clearly nothing but a distraction and here was your proof.

The bell rang again and you gathered your things only to stop in mid-motion at the realization that it was biology next. Would he expect more of the same? You sure as hell left him with a good indication that you were expecting to see him again. See you in biology, lover. Ugh. You cringed at the words.

Maria walked down the corridor with you speaking French like she always did when class was over. It was as if she thought the extra three minutes between classes was supposed to increase her knowledge of the language or something. Internally, you rolled your eyes, but kept smiling at your friend, replying in short answers. Jesus. You weren’t even kind to your actual friends. Who were you?

As you made your way down the hall, some of the kids were staring at you strangely. There was giggling as you passed a gaggle of preppie girls. Word was spreading. It hadn’t reached everyone yet, however. Maria would have pulled you into an empty classroom along the way just to interrogate you. No, it wasn’t everywhere. But it was building. You could feel it, thick in the air, like forest fire smoke. Like the cigarettes you had smelled on Eddie.

Fuck.

Get your head on straight!

Locker first, then class. You were almost late. That wasn’t like you, which showed how reticent you were to actually get to class. If you had the guts, you probably would have skipped. But you were as faithful as a bird dog; you couldn’t be devious. Not to a teacher, anyhow.

The class was almost full with kids coming in around you as you made your way to your normal lab bench. Gail wasn’t there. Was she sick today? You looked to the door in a blind panic for her. If that seat was empty, Eddie could sit there. Or worse: one of the jocks or party kids.

The teacher walked in. The door was going to close. Still no Gail.

“Uh, let’s break it up back there and get to work,” called Mr. Harris. You looked behind you to see Eddie and Jeff standing on either side of Gail who looked like she just lost an argument. You saw her nod at Eddie and take something from his hand. Eddie just grinned and snatched up his book and notebook.

You didn’t know if you were happy or sad, sick or well, dead or alive when Eddie Munson - with the biggest shit-eating grin on his face - plopped his things and himself right down beside you. He folded his arms on the lab table top and put his head down, face angled toward you.

“Hey, lover,’ he said, his voice a low rumble.

Why was there suddenly no air in the room?

Fucking hell. Get a grip!

Somewhere you found the fortitude to banter back. “Hey, cuddle-puppy,” you cooed sardonically, miraculously sounding like a human person with actual confidence. But you had to remind him that this wasn’t really real. Or were you just reminding yourself as his brown eyes melted you from the inside? “How’s my favorite co-conspirator?”

Eddie snickered a laugh. It was born of a nervousness he felt just sitting next to you. Jesus, he just called you ‘lover’! It was a bold move, even for him, but he had to show you he wasn’t scared of you. And when you called him a co-conspirator, that built a knot in his stomach he couldn’t explain. You wanted to continue this? Really? The knot turned sour. He didn’t need you or your lame-ass attempt at calling the cool kids’ bluff. Didn’t matter how pretty you were.

Mr. Harris cleared his throat and started the lesson. Today, you were dissecting frogs. But before you could begin, he had to make sure all of you turned in your permission slips. Eddie reached into his jacket inner pocket and drew his out, opening it up and waiting for Mr. Harris to come around. You noticed the signature.

“Your dad’s name is Wayne?” You were just making conversation. No harm meant by it. Still, you saw Eddie pause and side-eye you, clearly judging you and how best to answer.

Finally he said: “Uncle, actually.”

“Why didn’t your mom sign it?” Again, it was a natural enough question. Your mother had signed your slip and you had turned it in last week. Maybe his parents didn’t want him dissecting frogs and he had to go to another relative for assistance. You didn’t know. How were you supposed to? Eddie Munson was a stranger, really.

“She couldn’t,” he said as Harris took his slip from his fingers. “She’s too busy.”

“Busy? What does she do?”

“She’s the opposite of a helicopter parent.”

“Huh?”

“She took off when I was nine,” he said, watching for your reaction. Watching for the reaction that everyone gave him when they found out about his mom leaving him high and dry. And then dying. Of course, he could have just told you that she was dead, but plenty of people knew that: the school, the cops, Wayne. But no one knew that she died while running away from a man who used to beat the shit out of her. Died because of him chasing her in his car in the middle of winter. Died because she was brave enough to break away and just fucking run. But she couldn’t outrun a Buick. Wayne said she had had plans of coming back for Eddie, but that was a more complicated situation and too big a subject to cover just before the beginning of class.

“Oh.” 

And there it was: the look Eddie was so familiar with. The wide eyes, raised eyebrows of a person who couldn’t fathom that a mother could abandon their child. A certain satisfied cruelty settled inside him. His history with his mother was none of your business. This would keep you away from her, and therefore away from him.

“I’m so sorry about that, Eddie.”

And there was the predictable follow up: pity. Sad mournfulness for the poor orphaned boy whose mommy left him all alone. He nodded and continued to quietly regard you. He was watching you, observing like a scientist, distant and evaluating.

To break the awkwardness, you began: “But what about-“ You didn’t finish. You didn’t want to ask any more. His face was placid, but his eyes were still boring into you. You didn’t have the will to continue. Besides, class was starting and you had to pay attention. Prep trays and equipment were being passed around the class by Mr. Harris as well as some hand-picked students and you wanted to make sure you got what you were supposed to for the lesson. 

“But what about what?” Eddie prompted you. He was curious but cautious. Was this the witch plotting to spot weakness? He put up his mental defenses and waited.

“No, it’s none of my business. Sorry,” you said.

He leveled his gaze at you for another millisecond. Okay. Maybe you were still the fairy princess. He reached into his mental bag of holding and wielded the shield of humorous deflection and the cudgel of bravery. “Hey now, if we’re going to be co-conspirators, we’ve got to do a little soul-bearing, cupcake.” He tilted his head toward you briefly. “Go on, fire away.”

“What about your dad?” you asked, meekly. The next words poured from you and you felt yourself falling over yourself to navigate the situation and not make him angry. “Or am I getting too personal? I don’t mean to. Sorry if I am. I’m just curious. You can totally tell me to shut up now.” You could feel the blush creep up your ears.

Eddie smiled and ducked his head, cupping a hand to the back of his neck to hide it from you. God, you really were adorable. What in the everloving fuck was Eddie going to do with that?

“My dad couldn’t sign the permission slip because he’s busy being a guest of our fair state,” he said. He took in your puzzled look and whispered, smiling, “He’s in jail, babe. For a long long time.”

“So you live with your Uncle Wayne,” you concluded.

“Boy, you really are as smart as they say,” he said, his tone almost truly proud. Almost. That grin was back and you gave one back at him. Eddie liked that grin. He liked it a lot. 

The dead frog was the last thing to be deposited on your wax tray. “Are you ready for this?” he asked, removing his jacket and draping it on his stool before being seated once more. He pulled up his three-quarter sleeves to the elbow.

Tattoos. He has tattoos. You were NOT ready for tattoos. Jesus fuck fuck fuck fuckity fuck. You wanted to lick them. And then you remembered where you were.

“See something you like, sugar?”

“What? No! No. Just- I’ve never seen a kid our age with tattoos. That’s all.” The blush you felt pinking your skin could be seen from space. You were sure of it. Jesus.

He leaned in again to talk to you. It seemed he always leaned in when he thought he had something clever to say; it was annoying and alluring at the same time. “Well I do have a few more years on all of the children here,” he said, “or don’t you remember that about me?”

You did. You just… forgot. Something about that niggled in your brain. “Wait. If you’re well over the age of consent, why did you even have to get a permission slip signed?”

He tilted his head. He had to admit, that was a really good question. But he shrugged and countered: “Why did you? Aren’t you eighteen already?”

“Huh, true,” you said. “Maybe it’s a school thing.” you shrugged back at him.

“Heh. Looks like the Establishment has managed to brainwash us already.” He shook his shaggy head. “Well, I feel foolish.”

You had to smile at that. “You are very anti-establishment, aren’t you?”

“You really are getting to know me, huh darlin’?”

“Well,” you replied, whispering conspiratorially again, “what kind of a fake lover would I be if I didn’t get to know my pookie-kins?”

He looked at you with a comically critical face. “I don’t know about you. You may be too smart for me. I usually go for the empty-headed bimbo types.”

“Ah yes… like a jock, only a girl? Body by Jake, brain by Mattel?” you asked. His eyebrows raised and he let out a laugh, short and sharp.

Mr. Harris cleared his throat. “If I may begin?” he asked. The lesson started. Eddie handed you the scalpel with a wink.

You twirled a finger in your hair and looked comically puzzled. “The pointy end goes in the frog, right?” you asked him, giving him your best bimbo impression. Eddie couldn’t help himself; he giggled. He actually fucking giggled. He knew there was more to your game. There had to be. He couldn’t ignore his instincts. But he also knew that you were funny. And smart. And beautiful. And funny, smart, and beautiful totally worked for him.

Fuck.

#fanfic #writing #joe quinn #stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x f!reader #joseph quinn #la belle dame avec merci #lbdam #ao3 #ao3 fanfic #ao3 writer #slow burn

[aleksikesa]

Excerpt from the KK1 novelization

#the karate kid #daniel larusso #ali mills #cobra kai #just gonna add my thoughts in the tags instead of the caption cause im bad with words lol <3 but #like I get he’s being dramatic here but daniel’s loneliness in general is something that gets looked over a lot #thruout his teens his only friend was his 50+ yr old mentor/father figure #he didn’t rlly have any friends at school #his relationship with ali lasted only one semester #he expected kumiko to move to the us and then. she didn’t. #jessica moved away after a few months of them being friends #and daniel wanted terry to be a friend to him so bad but terry did All That to him instead #he’s good at making friends but bad at keeping them #and even as an adult with a whole ass family he still has no friends outside of his immediate family and coworkers #no wonder daniel clings to the memory of mr miyagi so fiercely he still considers him his only friend #i think the worst kind of loneliness is when ur surrounded by ppl who u know love u but u still feel so isolated #he gives and gives and gives but is always left behind #all this not even considering his ‘everything is my fault so I need to be in control all the time and fix Everything’ mentality #oh and his ptsd :)) #feels bad bro #please seek help king #talking #my stuff: excerpts

[pilvimarja]

I was asked for some headcanons for this fic by a commenter on AO3 and I thought I'd also share my reply over here in case anyone is interested 😊

Okay, so I think Daniel and Johnny will definitely meet again after their summer romance is over. Lucille sent Daniel to Italy for the summer so she can prepare for their big move to California without having Daniel mope about it all summer. She's getting things in order, renting them the apartment at South Seas, enrolling Daniel in West Valley High etc.

But Daniel is still blissfully unaware of the big move. For now, there's only Johnny and Italy. Johnny gets introduced to Daniel's grandmother and he makes the perfect first impression, because he's used to playing a gentleman for Ali's parents and all the waspy folks at the country club.

Daniel has to share a room with Louie, so they don't have a lot of privacy at Nonna LaRusso's house, but luckily Johnny has a whole stinky hotel room to himself 😉 Daniel takes Johnny's V card shortly after the night of clubbing (I think Daniel is more experienced than Johnny and has already had his first time, probably with a childhood friend á la Elio and Marzia in CMBYN) and they spend the rest of Johnny's time in Italy stealing kisses when no one is looking and screwing like rabbits.

Daniel shows Johnny all his favorite spots around the city and makes sure to avoid stuffy museums, except one day when they make a day trip to Florence and Johnny gets to see who "that David guy" actually is 🤭

Johnny's last night with Daniel is SAD 😔 I think Johnny cries, mourning the loss of Daniel and his freedom to be himself, and neither of them is in the mood for sex, so they just lie in bed, curled around each other until dawn comes and they have to say goodbye. Daniel does give Johnny his address and phone number in Newark, but when Johnny tries to call him just before school starts, he discovers that the number is not in use and he's really hurt, wondering if Daniel intentionally gave him the wrong number.

But then there's a bonfire on a beach in California. Johnny sees Daniel bouncing a soccer ball with Ali and he doesn't recognize him until Daniel picks up Ali's broken radio and tries to hand it back. Both of them are too shocked to speak, they just stare at each other in stunned silence. The Cobras want to see Johnny kick Daniel's ass and Dutch is like "are you gonna let this little punk get away with hitting on your girlfriend??", which makes Ali blow a fuse, because she and Johnny are NOT together anymore 😤

I think Johnny would just end up fleeing. He'd hop on his bike and drive away and spend the rest of the night getting drunk and having a massive internal crisis. Because Johnny can't be himself in the Valley. He's got to play a very specific role for his friends, and especially for Kreese, and the Ace Degenerate can't have feelings for another boy.

So I think things would be pretty messy for the first half of the semester. Daniel probably feels like Johnny is a completely different person and he mourns the loss of the sweet boy he got to love in Italy. But I don't think there would be any violence between Johnny and Daniel in this universe. There might be an All Valley, which Daniel would still win, but I can't picture Johnny physically hurting Daniel. And he wouldn't let the Cobras touch him either. He'd just avoid him and treat him like air, which to Daniel is even worse.

Johnny ends up quitting Cobra Kai after the tournament, just like he does in canon, and of course he'll show up at Mr. Miyagi's house one sunny afternoon. He'll apologize to Daniel and Daniel will forgive him, and Mr. Miyagi will take Johnny under his wing. And this is the proper beginning of their relationship, which will blossom the following summer when Mr. Miyagi flies to Okinawa and leaves Daniel and Johnny in charge of his house 😉 I think this is a relationship that will last. This could even be a prequel to the post-canon Livin' On A Prayer AU or the domestic AU where Daniel and Johnny have kids together from my Lawrusso drabble collection. Either way, Johnny and Daniel will be happy together for a long time ❤

#lawrusso #t:my fic #q

[sturchling]

Salt-Fic September Day 6: Camera

Damian had met Marinette about a year ago. He had been in Paris with his father, and had literally bumped into the clumsy girl. Despite his icy demeanor, Marinette still treated him with kindness. Her warmth thawed Damian to a degree and they spent the remainder of his trip together. By the time he left, they had decided to start a long-distance relationship. They messaged all the time, and FaceTime every night. It was during one of these nightly video chats that Damian learned about the liar.

---------------------

Damian had thought Marinette was exaggerating when she told him how gullible her class was. She wasn’t exaggerating. He had transferred to her school for a semester as an exchange student to see what the situation was, and it was worse than he thought. Marinette had told him that the class had been pulling away from her. What she did not tell him, is that she is almost completely isolated, with only three people still talking to her.

  ---------------------

Nino, Nathaniel, and Adrien all knew that the Italian was a liar and had stayed by Marinette’s side, despite the class pressuring them to abandon her. They said they should leave Marinette by herself to ‘teach her a lesson’. The thought of that infuriated Damian. How dare these imbeciles be so callous towards his angel. Damian knew it was the liar’s fault, she was the one who tricked the class into turning against Marinette. Damian was going to end this girl’s reign over the class if it was the last thing he did. Damian spent the rest of the school day, watching as the class fawned over the liar and her obviously made up stories. He could not believe how easily fooled they all were.

  ---------------------

After school, Damian spoke with Marinette to see what she had already tried. Damian was shocked by how some of the attempts had gone wrong. Like how when Marinette threw a napkin to prove Lila’s wrist wasn’t sprained, and they all fell for her stupid story about how a napkin gouged someone’s eye. How could anyone believe something so stupid? Then Marinette told him about how Alya had asked her for proof that Lila was lying, without having any proof herself that she was telling the truth. That gave Damian an idea.

  ---------------------

Though there was one question still on Damian’s mind. “Why has this deceiver grown to despise you?” Marinette just sighed. “I knew she was lying from day one. I-” Marinette paused before she revealed her secret and switched to a different story. “She said she saved Jagged Stone’s kitten, but I’ve worked for him before. He has never had a cat, only Fang. His crocodile. Anyway, after the napkin incident and she realized I was trying to expose her, she cornered me in the bathroom. She tried to play nice, but when I didn’t buy it, she changed. She told me she would take all my friends and leave me alone.” Damian had to force the rage he felt to the side, for one because Marinette had told him about akumas and he didn’t want to deal with that right now. But also, because now he had a plan. “You said she threatened you after you tried to expose her right? Think she would do the same if I did?”

  ---------------------

Damian’s plan was simple. He would actively try to expose the liar to the class, in a way that the liar was sure to notice. When that inevitably failed, like it did for Marinette, then he would make sure he was alone for a while in the locker room. Lila would come to threaten him, just like she did with Marinette and he would try to keep the liar talking as long as possible. What Lila won’t know is that there will be a hidden camera in the locker room recording every poisonous word. He will have video evidence of the liar admitting to her deception. He also planned to share the video, live, with everyone in school, so no one can claim it was edited. If this doesn’t convince the class, then he is getting his angel out of this school.

  ---------------------

The next day, Damian started his plan. First, he went into the locker room and hid a camera up near the windows. The camera is remote controlled so as soon as the liar came in to confront him, he would start recording. Then he went into the classroom to begin the next phase of the plan. When Lila started one of her stories, this time about helping Prince Ali with a new environmental charity, Damian pointed out to the class that Prince Ali is known for working with children charities, not environmental charities. Lila floundered for a moment, but quickly covered her tracks. “He may be known for the children’s charities, but he has a wide variety of philanthropic interests. He just doesn’t get as much media coverage for his other charities.” The class bought the lie and didn’t question the liar at all. But that hadn’t been Damian’s goal with that comment. And based of the glare the Italian was giving him, he had accomplished his true goal.

  ---------------------

At lunch, Damian waited in the locker room like he planned. He didn’t have to wait long before he heard it. The sound of the locker room door opening. He turned to see the liar standing near the door. Damian quickly started the camera recording and broadcasting, and waited for the liar to start talking. Once she knew they were alone, the smile dropped from her face. “I can see you’re smart so I’m not going to waste our time trying to trick you with the nice girl routine. Don’t ever try to expose me again, or you will regret it.” Damian couldn’t hide the smirk on his face as the liar fell into the trap, which seemed to anger her further. “What do you mean Lila? Expose what?” Lila sneered at Damian, “You know exactly what. You tried to expose that my stories are more fiction than fact. If you don’t want to go through what I did to Marinette, then be smart and back off.”

  ---------------------

Damian had succeeded with getting the liar to admit to her lies on camera. But he wanted to clear Marinette too. “What did you do to Marinette?” Lila smirked, “I made her friends abandon her. You’ve seen how she sits in the back with only a few friends. She used to be one of the most popular girls in class. Now she is a nobody in the back of the room that everyone thinks is a bully because I told them so. I even got her expelled for a while. And if you try to expose me as a liar again, I will do the exact same thing to you. I will make your time in Paris miserable.”

  ---------------------

Now it was Damian’s turn to smirk. “See I won’t have to expose you, because you just revealed yourself. See that little camera up there by the window. It recorded every word you just said. It has also been streaming this live to the whole school. Now the whole school knows you are nothing but a liar.” Lila turns pale as she finally notices the camera. She flees from the locker room, hoping that Damian was lying or that some people didn’t watch the video or watched it and didn’t believe it. But when she got back to the courtyard everyone was glaring at her. Just like that Lila’s hold on the school was completely broken. She tried to reclaim her control, but no one listened to her now. Damian had also shared the video with one person outside of the school. Lila’s mother. Her mother had come quickly after the video aired and pulled her daughter out of the school, to send her back to Italy to attend a reform school. The liar was gone from his angel’s life and Marinette couldn’t be happier. And it was all thanks to Damian and his camera

Hope you guys liked it! @maribat-central-official

#saltfic september #salt september #ml #ml fic #ml fanfic #ml salt #ml salt fic #ml salt fanfic #class salt #ml class #ml class salt #lila rossi #Lila exposed #lila exposed fic #lila salt #lila gets exposed #miraculous ladybug #miraculous fanfic #miraculous fic #miraculoustalesofladybugandcatnoir #miraculous salt fanfic #miraculous salt fic #miraculous salt #ml x dc #miraculous x dc #maribat #damimari #daminette #maridami #damian x marinette

[writtenonreceipts]

I saw this prompt for feysand and i would love to see your take on it - I get stuck with a late class that doesn’t end until 9pm and I’m always anxious about walking across the campus to the dorms, so you offer to walk with me and one night, I find out that it’s in the exact opposite direction that you need to go in

I've really been enjoying your writing!!❤

AN: I took it and ran, and ran, and kept running.  Thank-you so, SO much for sending it my way!  This was a great prompt that had fun with.  I’m glad you’ve been liking my stuff, it means a lot! ~5.5kwords

TW: Brief talk about death, anxiety, depression, fear.

 Worth It

Seated at a canvas with paints or pencils in hand, Feyre was unstoppable.  She could create landscapes with ease or depict a simple still life and turn it into something far greater.  Art was where she lived.

Not in a basement classroom learning about Prythian history.  

There wasn’t anything wrong with history, especially when it was as rich and vibrant as Prythia.  But talking about wars, treaties, and assassinations could only be discussed for so long.

Of course, it didn’t help that Feyre was dyslexic, but she didn’t talk about that.

She glanced around the room, trying to see if anyone else was as bored as she was.  It was the first day of class and she was the only one not taking extensive notes.  Well, she and a guy at the front of the room.  All Feyre could see was the back of his head.  His hair was dark as midnight and the sleeves of his shirt were rolled up as he sat at his desk.  He didn’t even have a textbook with him.

Feyre forced herself to pay attention as the Professor finally shut down the slide show presentation.

“Make sure you look of the syllabus,” Dr. Wesson addressed the class.  She was a small woman with rich brown hair and a plain green dress.  “It outlines the schedule of tests and essays.  None of the dates will be altered.  My TA will be at your disposal.” 

Dr. Wesson nodded to the guy with the black hair and gestured for him to stand up.

And just like that, the class was the most fascinating thing in the world. 

He was tall, taller than he’d originally appeared.  His warmly tanned skin made his violet blue eyes bright and eager.  A sly sort of smile traced his mouth as he observed the class.

“Call me Rhysand,” he said, “I’m working on my masters specifically in the historical aspect of how literature was shaped by wars in the land.  I’m always glad to help with your questions.  Just make sure you email me to set something up.”

The girls next to Feyre whispered to each other, exchanging significant looks.  Feyre exchanged a significant look with the amount of reading and writing that was required.

Hell.  It was going to be a long semester.

The class dismissed right at nine o’clock, much to Feyre’s relief.  While most of the students flocked to the front of the room to either gawk at the TA or further discuss issues with the Professor, Feyre left the class.  Already she could feel her dread pooling into anxiety.  Her heart rate quickened and the muscles in her left hand twitched.  

She just needed to get home and sit down with a canvas and paint.

As soon as she made it outside the Humanities Building however, the dread continued to tug at Feyre.  It was far too dark.  With far fewer lights than she’d expected for a college campus.  Or maybe it was because there was a thick layer of clouds sagging down and threatening rain.  

“Feyre!” 

Snapping to attention, Feyre clutched her bag to her chest and found the source of her name.

Her friend, and roommate, Alis waved at her from a path diverging deeper on to campus.  Her dark hair hung in waves down her back and the jacket she wore was flattering against her curves.

Feyre let out a long, releieved breath and plastered a smile on her face.  Quickly, she moved toward her friend.

“Hey,” Feyre greeted and accepted a hug from the smaller girl. “What are you doing here?”

“I know you had a late class,” Alis explained, “and I knew it was with Wesson.  I heard the woman is miserable.  So intense.  But--I mean--you’re going to do great.  Your always so creative with everything I’m sure she’ll love you.  Anyway, I was finishing up buying my books for the semester and thought I’d meet up with you.”

Feyre smiled as Alis spoke, grateful for the small distraction.  Even if it was slightly horrific in thinking about trying to get on a professor’s good-side.

“Thanks,” Feyre said, “I appreciate it.  It was a bit intimidating.”

“I think everyone just likes making freshman miserable,” Alis said.  Alis was technically a junior, but had changed her major four times and couldn’t decide on a minor.  She was not on track to graduate when she’d originally thought, but wasn’t at all concerned.  

Feyre wished she could be more like that than the raging mess she felt she was.

Behind them, leaving the Humanities Building, the TA appeared leading an entire gaggle of girls.

“Let’s go,” Feyre muttered. “I’m exhausted.”

#

By the third week of the semester Feyre came to better understand her relationship with exhaustion.  And it was not a good one.

She was fairly certain her body consisted of ninety percent caffeinated beverages and ten percent hot pockets.  She’d never been one for eating much.  Growing up had always been a struggle in keeping food in the fridge and a decent pair of shoes on her feet.  Feyre knew by now how her body functioned.

It wasn’t healthy, not in the slightest.  And there was a part of her that recognized that.  And another part that ignored it.

Two nights a week, Feyre found herself stuffed in the basement with little enjoyment.  Other than getting to stare and Rhysand when Dr. Wesson turned the class over to him for brief instruction.

And looking at him was enjoyment.  He was far different from any other guy Feyre had encountered.  His hair was kept neat and short sweeping easily back out of his face, a charming smile, and warm brown skin.  Not to mention the tattoos. 

Feyre had never really considered tattoos as being attractive.  Perhaps it was the artistic side of her that couldn’t get enough of them.  On him at least.  The way the black in swirled on his skin and swept up his arms.  It was a shame he never wore short sleeves or unbuttoned one extra cutton at his collar.

Hell.

Mentally shaking herself, Feyre forced herself to pay attention.

Rhysand was discussing scores from the test last week.  And, to put it mildly, was not impressed.  Oh, there was plenty of good to say.  Some of the students were engaged in the topics at hand.  Some of the students displayed an obvious grasp of complicated topics.  Others did not.

Feyre found herself sinking deeper into her seat by the end of class.

He hadn’t called her out by name, but truly--it felt like he had.

“That’s it for today, enjoy the weekend,” Rhysand called out at the tick of nine, “and remember essay proposals are due by the start of class on Tuesday.”

There was a quick rustle of the students getting up and gathering their things.  It was a glorious Thursday evening and Feyre had somehow managed to keep her Friday’s clear of classes.  At least something had gone right.

“Feyre?” She whipped around to meet those stark violet eyes. Hell. “I needed to talk to you about the questions you had on the proposal assignment.”

Feyre bristled.  And not just because some of the girls shot her angry looks for being singled out by the hot TA.  She hadn’t asked any questions.  She was just trying to skate by on this class and be done with her prerequisites so she could get into her Art Major.

She set her bag on the floor once more and went to the front of the class.  Already most of the students were leaving, far too eager to be done with school for the night.

As Rhysand answered a few last questions and dismissed the rest of the students, Feyre approached.  Already she knew what she was going to say.

“I don’t have any questions.” The words fell from her mouth with ease. “I already know what I’m writing on.”

Lie.  But a well-practiced one.

Rhysand’s mouth curled in a smile.  He hefted a small stack of papers in one hand and leafed through them.  Feyre froze realizing that they were the tests from last week.  He pulled one of the stapled bunches out before setting the rest down.

“Honestly, I was surprised while grading this,” he said, “I mean, you’re obviously smart.  I saw that you were awarded the Starfell Scholarship, not an easy accomplishment.  Not to mention your always engaged and taking notes.”

Feyre wished her skin wasn’t as pale as it was.  Her skin flushed under his scrutiny, but she tilted her chin up and met his gaze.

“And?” she asked. “I take my education seriously.”

Somewhat.  When she actually liked the work.

Rhysand handed her the test.  And she saw the grade.

D.

D.

D.

Hell.

Her stomach churned.  Roiled actually.  Maybe she was going to be sick.  That was just what she needed.

“So?” she asked instead. “It was the first test of the semester.”

“And yours in the only outlier,” he replied.

His eyes never left hers and Feyre felt more and more inclined to throw something at him.  Who was he to talk to her about her grade?  He was just the damned TA.

“Dr. Wesson doesn’t like picking up the slack of grading or talking to students about it all that much,” he continued, literally reading her mind. “I’m just concerned about you falling behind.”

Feyre stiffened and pursed her lips.

“I grew up learning Prythian history, I’m sure I’ll be fine,” she said stiffly.  

Another lie.  She knew enough that basic education taught and what she’d heard and listened to.  But reading about it?  Her mind couldn’t grasp it.  It had been hard enough getting decent SAT scores to get accepted in the University let alone writing that damned Starfell essay.

“Of course,” Rhysand said slowly.

And Feyre had the sense that he was assessing her.  Analytically, carefully.  In the was that one would size up an opponent or scrutinize a strange recipe.  He was trying to understand her.

Feyre handed him back the test.

“Thanks for the concern,” she said, “but I’ll be fine.”

Perhaps he was just being nice.  Perhaps he was merely trying to fulfill his duties as TA.  But she had seen the way he acted in the class.  At times rebuffing boys and girls alike.  Not to mention seeing him around campus tossing a football around with two other boys.  She’d also seen him get kicked out of the library for a parkour prank challenge.  

In all honesty, Feyre had no idea what to make of him.  And she wasn’t sure she wanted to find out.

He didn’t seem to believe her.  Not with the crease forming between his brow nor the frown turning down one side of his mouth.  

Well, that was his problem.

“Have a good night,” Feyre said.  She spun on her heel before he could say anything and grabbed her bag and was out the door.  

Once she was outside, she could breathe again.  Strange.  She often found the darkness, the night, to be so suffocating.  It wasn’t long before Feyre realized something was off about the night.  And then she realized.  Alis was nowhere in sight.

Feyre dug her phone out of her pocket and found a missed text.

Sorry chica, caught up at study group.  Probs gonna spend the night at Nuala’s too.  See you tomorrow!

Of all the nights Alis could get serious with her girlfriend.

Feyre swallowed stiffly and stared out over the pavilion that stretched between the humanities building and out to the mathematics building.  A few pathways branched off to different parts of campus and then there was the main one that would take her to the dorms.  And of course, most of the streetlamps were barely flickering to life.

She’d never liked the dark.  Never liked what could hide in the shadows.  Nor what could sneak in silence.  Perhaps it was childish to still hold onto that fear.  She was almost nineteen years old after all. Nearly fifteen years later and here she was.

Feyre’s hands shook as she clutched her phone.  She could call Elain.  Nesta.  Even just to talk to as she walked.  Though Elain lost her phone even when it was in her hand.  And Nesta was at work.  

But it was fine.  Feyre knew it was fine.  Because all she needed to do was walk.  And shed been walking for long enough that putting one step in front of the other was natural.  Easy.  Simple.  Yet here she was.  Standing.

When Rhysand spoke, she didn’t even start.  

“Are you waiting for someone?” he asked.

Myself.  “No.”

Silence.

“It’s getting late.”

“I know.”

Silence.

How strange it was, to hear only the hum of crickets and breath of night.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Rhysand asked.  

Feyre glanced at him.  Even in the shadows she could see him clearly.  It was like he was made of night, of dark, of the mysteries that she could never lay her hand on.  She shook her head.  Focus, Feyre.

“Of course I am,” she insisted, a little too sharply. “Maybe I like having time to think.”

“At nine-thirty at night.  Outside the least exciting building on campus.”

“Oh, I don’t know.  I heard that last year a group of boys nearly got suspended for trying to host a snowball fight, indoors.” Feyre couldn’t help but grin when she saw how Rhysand flushed.

“Technically, I’m not the one who brought the snowballs inside the building,” he said defensively.

“Oh, no, you’re just the one who built an entire fort in front of the main entrance to the building,” Feyre said.

It had actually been pretty hilarious when she’d heard about it from Alis. It almost made her wish that she'd been around last year instead of taking a year off.

“Technically,” he said again, the word making Feyre’s brow arch, “it was my brother who instigated the fight. He couldn’t let his reign be challenged.”

Feyre snorted a laugh and looked out over the quiet campus. It almost didn't look so dark and cold as she'd thought it had.  But still, she felt her heart continue to hammer out unevenly in her chest.  She couldn't walk home alone. Even the thought of taking one step forward had her clench and unclench a fist over the strap of her bag.

Rhysand continued saying something, but Feyre was only half listening.  She was mostly focused on the thought of walking home.  She could cut through the Science building.  If it was still open.  Or she could full out sprint.

“Are you alright?” Rhysand asked.

Flushing, Feyre pushed her hair out of her eyes and nodded. “Fine, yeah.” She knew she had to ask him.  Knew that it was her only option despite how embarrassed she might feel. “Could you--this is stupid, so you can say no--could you walk with me to the dorms?”

Rhysand was quiet for a moment.  And in that moment Feyre was certain he was going to sneer at her.  Laugh.  Tell her to get over herself.  Just like the others before him.

"Where do you live?" Rhys and asked suddenly, cutting Feyre off before she had the ch

“The dorms on the west side,” she said.

“Alliance Dorms?” Rhysaid confirmed.  When Feyre nodded, he flashed her a small smile. “Absolutely.”

Relief pounded through Feyre.

“If you tell me what the deal was with that test.”

“You’re an ass.”  The words were out before Feyre could stop them.  Not the best thing to say to the TA of a class she was likely going to flunk.

Scowling, more to herself than him, Feyre started walking towards the dorms.  She was a strong confidant woman.  She did not need him to walk her home.

But Rhysand with those damned long legs kept stride with her easily.  And he was laughing.  Feyre was half tempted to knock an elbow in his side for laughing at her, but his next words caught her off guard.

“I like you Feyre,” he said, “you are rather interesting.”

She glanced up at him.  Was he serious?  She’d insulted him.  She’d barely exchanged ten words with him at this point.  And was scared of walking home alone.  Granted it was a valid fear for a young woman on a college campus these days.

“Insane is the better word for it,” she replied, mostly under her breath.  That’s what everyone back home said at least.  In the small town where nothing was supposed to go wrong.  But everything did.

“Interesting, curious, vibrant,” Rhysand listed off. “Far better words I think.”

Feyre had never been good with words.  Like now.  She couldn’t find the energy to respond to him.  There was a spark in his eye that almost challenged her, begged her to continue the banter, the little game.  

She remained silent.

She’d heard it was a far better mask for her to wear anyways.

#

The first paper she turned in for the History class was returned with far too many red marks.  Far too many question marks.  Far too many.  So Feyre merely folded the thing in half and stuffed it in her bag.

She could burn it later.

Dr. Wesson ended the lecture right at nine and dismissed the class.  Feyre had almost disillusioned herself into thinking she could avoid a conversation with the Professor.  With Rhysand.  But just as she was trying to maneuver around the giggling pack of girls that sat next to her, Dr. Wesson’s voice called out for her.

“Oh Miss Archeron, a word please?”

Feyre froze.  She could feign a phone call.  But then next class session the same thing would happen.  So, Feyre braced herself for what was to come and went to the front of the class.

As usual, Rhysand looked perfectly unruffled.  Despite the fact that Fall was quickly slipping into the winter months, he still wore a simple black button up tucked into slacks, the sleeves rolled up.

“Feyre,” Dr. Wesson said as she approached, she reached out a hand and gave Feyre a firm pat on the arm. “I know Rhysand spoke to you last week about your test.  I wanted to follow up, especially in seeing how this essay went.  Now, there is still plenty of time left in the semester, but I worry you aren’t grasping the things you should be.”

Blood pounded in Feyre’s ears.  She could hear her heart beat throb, feel it in her veins.  Her entire body flushed with embarrassment, stress, horror.  Everything bubbled to the surface even though she’d tried so hard to tamp it down.

She tried to open her mouth but found her teeth were grinding together so bad that her jaw hurt.

“I think,” Dr. Wesson continued, “that you would benefit from spending a bit of extra time with Rhysand.  Just to make sure you’re where you need to be in the class.”

Feyre found herself nodding and agreeing.  Her voice was relaxed, calm even.  But far too close to breaking.

After thanking the Doctor for her uncharacteristic kindness, Feyre stared and the poorly erased whiteboard over Rhysand’s shoulder for a long moment.  With a slow exhale she finally met his gaze.

Rhysand met her eyes with such intensity that Feyre nearly lost her breath all over again.  She shook it off and rolled her shoulders.

“Shall we get started tonight?” she asked. “Or I’m sure you have plans.”

“Nah, only kicking Cassian’s ass at Mario Cart,” Rhysand replied.  He flashed her an innocent sort of smile.  Feyre wasn’t sure if it was one out of kindness or mockery of some sort.

She pulled her phone from her pocket and stuck it out for him. “Just give me your number and I’ll let you know when’s a good time to study.”

Rhysand hesitated on a moment before accepting the phone and adding his details.  As soon as she got her phone back, Feyre changed his name from Rhys to Prick.  It seemed to fit better.

“It’s not a big deal you know,” Rhysand said.  

He followed Feyre out of the classroom.  His steps were confident against the carpet that had to be at least thirty years old.  Truly Rhysand was an enigma with his ease, grace, and elegance when pitted against the drab interior of the Humanities Building.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Feyre said.

Once outside, the cold night air nipped at her skin and even through her jacket she could feel goosebumps rise.  Just like the night last week, Feyre waited just outside the building doors.  She stared into the night; across the courtyard she could see a few pale lights from the Math Building.  None of the lampposts had been fixed which left most of the walkways in shadows.

Nothing about the night was out of place.  It was calm, still, and everything lingered on Feyre’s mind.  And just like last week, Rhysand waited beside her.

Overhead, Feyre could just make out the stars.  Only a thin veil of clouds hung over the sky allowing a small bit of freedom to pierce her heart.  But not enough.

“Could you walk with me again?” she asked quietly, unable to look at Rhysand.

“Only if you talk to me this time,” he said.  That cheeky grin returning.  And despite how much she hated it, it put Feyre at ease.

“Fine.” She stuffed her hands in her pockets and began walking. “What made you pick history?  There had to be something else.  You don’t seem the type for old stuffy books or maps.”

“And who do you peg me for, Feyre?” His voice was practically a purr.

“High and mighty sitting behind a desk,” she replied drily. “Running some company somewhere.  You certainly have the personality for it.”

He laughed unamused. “If my father had any say in the matter.  A degree in history only puts off the inevitable.”

“That’s a rather bleak look on things,” Feyre said.  It sounded like something she would say.

“Only if I didn’t enjoy what I was learning so much,” he said.  In the flickering light of the lamps, they walked beneath, Rhysand’s expression brightened. “Between the wars and legends surrounding what shaped the country...it’s always been curious to see what we became.  What we can become.”

His response seemed so honest, so genuine, that Feyre nearly stumbled.  She barely knew him, had barely spent any time with him, yet she was beginning to feel that she knew him.

“So you devote all your time and attention to it?” Feyre asked.

They passed by the last of the campus buildings.  A brisk wind scattered fallen leaves on the sidewalks and crunched under their steps as they walked.

“Don’t you have something you love?  Something that you feel has changed you and you’d never want to give it up?”

A box of paints.  Brushes that she’d had since she was ten.  A canvas only half finished.  She’d thought she could complete the image but it had been almost a year since she’d even looked at it.  But art…art had changed her.  Art had loved her just as she loved it.

“I guess you’re right,” she admitted.  Tilting her chin up, Feyre caught sight of a small patch of stars amid the inky black sky.  Dim but shining still. “There’s always something.”

If he heard the sadness in her voice, he said nothing.  Which was partially surprising, but Feyre would roll with it.

“The tutoring,” Rhysand began.

“No,” Feyre cut him off.  “Not right now.”

“So you’re just going to ignore your problems?”

“It’s not a problem.”

“Seems to be.”

Feyre stopped causing him him to move a few steps ahead of her.  When he turned back towards her, he waited.  

“I’ll admit to needing a little extra help to help my tests and essays, but I don’t see what else you’d need to know.”

“It’s alright to talk,” Rhysand paused, something else on the cusp of behind heard.  But he restrained, his voice trailing off softly.

Feyre ignored the comment.  Talking had never been her strong suit.  She was more of action.  Less idle, more work.  Ever since she was a child it had been that way.  She knew why, of course.  It was obvious when she thought about it.  So she never thought about it.

“What are you planning on studying?” Rhysand asked when she made no effort to continue on the topic of her test.

“Art,” she replied immediately. “I’m an artist.  But my sister wanted me to get more of an education that could support me.  So I’m just working on my prerequisites.”

“Art,” he repeated.  There was a lilt to his voice as if he really were actually interested in what she was saying. “Sketching?  Sculpture?”

“Paint and canvas,” Feyre said.  “Since I was little.  After my mom died, my sister bought me my first set of brushes and paint and everything I could need.  She was only nine.  I think she stole my dad’s credit card to do it.”

The reality of that had Feyre laughing softly, but Rhysand gave her look that was a mix of horror and confusion.

“It’s fine,” Feyre said quickly, “I’m fine.”

It was a lie of course.  If she really were fine, she wouldn't have asked him to walk her home.  She would better know how to control her fears, her anxiety.  She would be happy.

“My mother died ten years ago,” Rhysand told her, his voice quiet and contemplative. “She’d been sick for a while and we knew it was coming.  But for a ten-year-old boy, it was hard to understand.  My father certainly didn’t.  Still doesn’t.”

They reached Feyre’s dorms then, floodlights illuminated the front street and made it seem as though it were day.  Feyre turned toward him and found herself smiling, just barely.

“Thank-you,” she said sincerely.  “And I’m sorry you have to be a part of the dead mother’s club.”

“You too,” he said.

Feyre wondered if there was something else she should say.  Wondered if he would even want to hear it.  It was strange, that little flame of comradery that she felt towards him.  But it was gone in an instant as Alis came running out from the building.

“Feyre!  Get inside, it’s movie night!”

Shaking her head, Feyre offered Rhysand a small wave and headed into the dorms.

#

With three weeks until the next paper was due in that miserable class, Feyre spent her free time studying with Rhysand.  It wasn’t as miserable as she’d been expecting it to be.  Not when she realized he was far more laid back than she’d assumed.  And then she’d met his best friends who were essentially like his brothers.

It was far easier to study in the relaxed environment that Rhysand created.  And far easier to be herself around him.  Of course, it had taken Feyre a while to decide that maybe they could be friends.  

“Summarize what the chapter from last night’s reading discussed,” Rhysand said one night as they were studying.  It was well after ten o’clock but they’d been given permission to stay in the building.  

Feyre pursed her lips.  She’d done the reading of course.  As well as she’d been able.  Most of had been hard to understand.  No matter how she tried to focus or train her mind, her dyslexia always got in the way.

“Right,” Feyre said slowly. “It was about the last king of Hybern.”

“And?” Rhysand prodded.

“And he was a jerk,” Feyre added.  

Rhysand’s fixed her with a look.  Long and hard but still underlined with compassion.

“Feyre,” he said, just a bit more seriousness to his voice.

She sighed heavily and tugged at the sleeve of her shirt. “I read it.  I just didn’t understand it.”

Silence.

Feyre shot him a scowl but didn’t meet his eyes. “I’m dyslexic.  And History tends to be a bit harder for me to understand.”

Rhsand blinked.  Once.  But nothing else.  No laugh or scoff of scorn.  Instead, he smiled and pushed to text book toward her.

“Then read.”

“Read?”

“Aloud, preferably,” Rhysand said.  He shrugged. “You want to be ready for the paper and subsequent test?”

“Prick,” she muttered.  But she dragged the book towards her and began.

It became habit.  A rhythm they fell into for the next several weeks.  Rhysand helped Feyre study and prepare for the paper, the test.  He walked her home, remaining the perfect gentleman.  And Feyre, Feyre relished the time.

It was because he was genuine.  Honest.  There was something about him, deeper than the intensity he displayed on the outside.  And for the first time in a while, Feyre found herself laughing with him.  For the first time in a while, she was living for more than just expectations.

He was actually turning into her friend and it was strange thought indeed.

“Alright students,” Dr. Wesson announced towards the end of class on the last day before Thanksgiving break. “I have your midterm tests and papers graded.  So now you can either relax or stress even further.  Depending on the grade.”

A weak laugh bubbled around the room.  Feyre gripped the underside of her chair tightly.  She wasn’t ready for this.  Not in the slightest.

Dr. Wesson slowly made her way around the room delivering both test and paper.  Feyre, by some stroke of cosmic affair, didn’t get her paper until last and the entire room was empty aside from Dr. Wesson and Rhysand.  Why was it they always ended up here?

“Well done, Miss Archeron,” Dr. Wesson said.  She handed two packets of paper to Feyre and smiled. “I love to see improvement.”

Gaping, Feyre looked between the two grades.  Heart hammering, she looked over the scores, brilliant red B’s shined up at her.

“I don’t usually offer extra credit,” the doctor went on, “but an exhibit is coming to the University about the Prythian Wall and it’s destruction.  If you can come up with a project to demonstrate what it entails, I might be convinced to help you keep your grade up.”

Feyre could only nod as the professor bid them goodnight and left.

“Well done.”

Feyre looked up to see Rhysand beaming at her and she couldn’t help but grin.  She leapt out of her seat and flung her arms around him in an embrace.

“Thank-you!” she whispered.  It took her perhaps a moment too long to realize that a hung might not have been the best of plans.  She hurriedly pulled back. “Sorry.  That was uncalled far.  I’m just really excited.”

“As you should be,” Rhysand said.  His smile hadn’t dimmed but there was something in his eyes that Feyre couldn’t quite read. “It wasn’t an easy test.”

“And now we have a full week off for Thanksgiving,” she said.  It was the best news she could have been given after getting her grades back.

“If you want,” Rhysand said, “my brother’s and cousin and I are having a game night, with pizza.  If you want to come.”

A spark of excitement ignited in Feyre’s chest.  She didn’t know when she’d developed a stupid little crush on Rhysand, but it was slowly starting to simmer out of control.  She should have said no.  Or come up with an excuse of some kind.  Insead she found herself nodding.

“I’d like that,” she said.

They collected their things and left the building.  Feyre took a few steps down the path they usually took to get to her dorm when she paused.  She turned back to Rhysand and frowned.

“Where do you live?”

Rhysand looked a little sheepish.  “Oh, I live over in the Court Apartments.”

Feyre blinked. “That’s in the complete opposite direction from my place.”

“Yes.”

“You’ve been walking me home for practically a month.”

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Feyre asked, practically waving her hands in the air.  “It’s basically a two-mile walk from my place.”

Rhysand shrugged. “You asked for help and I wanted to give it.”

Feyre stared at him.  Her coat and scarf bunched around her neck, even though the night was perfectly clear.  It was clear enough that she could see the billions of stars overhead.  She could see them sparking in the black night.  And for one she wasn’t overcome with her usual anxiety.  Her usual fears.  Instead, all she would do was stare at Rhysand.

“Why would you do that?” she insisted.

Rhysand opened and closed his mouth a few times. “Because you were worth it.”

His simple words hung between them and Feyre had a hard time knowing what to say or how to react.  So she merely smiled and hooked her arm with his.

“Tell me about game night.  Am I going to wind up on some snipe hunt?”

“Oh no, you and I are going to gang up against Cassian and beat him at Mario Cart.”

Feyre laughed. “Sounds like a plan.”

And she realized that she wouldn’t mind if that’s how the rest of her nights played out.  Late hours of laughs and friends, being around people--one person--who made her feel better than she had in a long time.  

No, she wouldn’t mind it at all.

#

thanks so much for reading!

tags:

please reach out if i missed you and let me know if I put you on the wrong tag list/want to be removed.  it’s generally going to be easier for me to just have basic acotar/tog lists and not go into too much worry about that, so just and fyi...anywho

tags:  @tottenhamboys20  @aelinchocolatelover @more-espresso-less-depresso-xx  @bamchickawowow @ladywitchling @ireallyshouldsleeprn @courtofjurdan @sassys-world @sleeping-and-books @superspiritfestival @chieflemming @julemmaes @lysandra-ghost-leopard @harrymoncheri @firestarsandseneschals @emikadreams​  @rapunzel1523 @booksofthemoon  @highladysith​ @fangirlprincess09

#feysand #feysand au #anon #prompts #answered #acotar #feyre archeron #rhysand #acomaf #sjm #fanfiction #feysand fanfiction

[simsvillecreator]

Life In Simsville

Life in Simsville is an original Sims 2 series developed on Youtube in 2007 which aired for five seasons. This series is based off my characters created from classic Sims games such as The Sims, The Sims Bustin' Out, and The Urbz: Sims in the City.The series is a comedy dealing with everyday life, whether it's problems with school, relationships, friendship, bullies, jobs, and family. The series ended on Youtube in 2012 after its fifth season. A spin-off called “Neon East” was later created which takes place during seasons 4 and 5 of Life in Simsville. It centers on Life in Simsville’s alumni, Meredith Butler, who was a college friend of Jill, Erica, and Saria.

Related shows: Neon East (Also on Youtube)

SEASON 1: High School (2007)

This season introduces teenagers and their lives throughout high school. First, we have the Smith family, Jill, and her two younger sisters Jasmine and Ellen. We then meet have the Henry family, Sarah (Ellen's best friend) and her younger brother Sam (whom Ellen has a crush on). We then meet the Brackingtons, Eliza (Ellen and Sarah's best friend) and her older sister Erica (Jill's best friend). We then meet the Hendersons, Saria, and her younger brother Bryan (Sam's best friend), and younger sister Carla. Last, but not least, we meet Shayna Miller, an adult who has just recently moved to Simsville from Neon East with her older sister, Anna. This season, the cast go through several obstacles in life, including facing romance, being bullied, having trouble with jobs, crashing house parties, struggling with outdoor camping, being framed for thievery, as well as sneaking out to nightclubs and getting stuck inside haunted mansions on Halloween. This season ends with Jill, Erica, and Saria graduating from high school and the gang celebrating at a bowling center.

SEASON 2: College (2008)

This season picks up where Season 1 left off, where Jill, Erica, and Saria go off to college and attend Sim State University. However, they are also joined by their younger siblings, due to them attending summer school and receiving the high school credits they needed to graduate and attend college. This season introduces some new characters including Meredith Butler, a college student who has been struggling to graduate for a long time and ends up befriending Jill and Erica. We also meet Bruno Matson, a college bully who makes Sam and Bryan's college lives a living hell throughout the semester. We then have Delia Martin and Diedre Stevens, the rivals of Ellen, Jasmine, Eliza and Sarah. They all share a dorm together, and pretty much prove that not all females can get along while living together. Things, however, end up getting worse when Gracy Abbott, a college senior, moves in and raises hell for everyone, and results in burning down their dorm. Gracy treats Carla's presence as a breeze of air, as though she does not exist. This is a running gag that occurs throughout the rest of the series, and it is still in question whether or not Gracy really can see Carla. That's not all the surprises we have! Shayna is also revealed to be pregnant this season, however, the father is unknown. This season ends with the cast celebrating New Years Eve, while Shayna ends up giving birth to her newborn baby.

SEASON 3: (2008 - 2009)

This season continues on with the gang's college lives. However, this time, with Ellen, Sarah, Carla, and Eliza's dorm burnt down to the ground (with Delia, Diedre, and Gracy now moved out), they now live in a much smaller and more uncomfortable home off campus, while Jasmine ends up moving into Jill, Erica, and Saria's dorm, and Jill and Erica end up getting their own apartment in order to get away from Jasmine's annoyance. Sam and Shawn continue to live their lives being bullied by Bruno, while Bryan moves out and lives in the campus Greek House along with new characters, Owen Howard and Rick Pebbles. Jasmine makes her New Year's resolution come true by opening her own fashion clothing store, with Saria as her assistant manager and Gracy as her only employee...however, things don't go well for her business as Gracy mistreats the customers. Shayna confronts the father of her newborn daughter, Vince Conway (whom she dated in one episode during season 1), and decides to name her daughter after the father, thinking it would be weird to name her daughter after the mother since it is her own name. Shayna spends most of this season taking advantage of her sister, Anna, and leaving her to babysit her daughter while Shayna goes out and parties. Shayna also becomes jealous when she finds out that Vince is engaged to another woman. Bella Goth makes a special guest appearance this season, continuing her story about being abducted by a UFO. This season ends with Meredith leaving and moving back home to Neon East, the gang graduating from Sim State University, Sam finally proposing to Ellen, and Shayna finding out that Vince isn't the real father of her baby.

SEASON 4: (2009 - 2010)

This season begins with the cast starting their lives off to adulthood. Sam and Ellen discuss their marriage plans and having children in the future, while Ellen decides to take up a job babysitting, believing that she needs practice being around children if she plans to have some of her own. Shayna ends up hiring Ellen as her babysitter, and pretty much treats her the same way she did Anna last season. Saria begins her career as a professional model when she is approached by a new character, Miko Jeffers, who becomes her manager, and her boyfriend. Jasmine also ends up hiring a new employee, Jamie Sampson, in order to replace Gracy after leaving last season, however, Jasmine becomes annoyed when she discovers that all Jamie wants to do is be exactly like her. Gracy later returns when she offers to buy out Jasmine's store, in exchange of paying her millions, while Carla continues her career in law school and Eliza takes up fashion designing. Jill, Ellen, and Jasmine are also surprised when they've come to find out that they have half-brothers, Andy and Joey Smith. Things also get twisted when we find out that the real father of Shayna's daughter is Rob Henderson (Saria, Bryan, and Carla's father), while Bryan and Sarah begin to develop feelings for eachother. This season ends with Anna leaving Shayna and moving back to Neon East, Gracy threatening to sue Jasmine for breach of contract, and Sam and Ellen getting married.

SEASON 5: (2012)

This season begins with Jasmine being taken to court with Carla as her lawyer, being sued by Gracy. With Jasmine losing the case, she also ends up losing her home and her business, and her boyfriend, James Donovan. Jill and Erica then offer Jasmine a job as a waitress at “Brackington’s Bistro,” which is a restaurant owned by Erica’s father until Jasmine gets back on her feet. Meanwhile, Sam and Ellen are on their honeymoon in Three Lakes. When they return back to Simsville, they realize that their lives have changed, struggling in finding a place to live after blowing most of their money on their wedding and honeymoon. Sarah and Bryan continue their secret relationship, but after discovering how addicted Sarah is to witchcraft, Bryan breaks up with her due to Sarah being unable to control her addiction. A new character, Don Henderson, is later introduced. Don is the cousin of Saria, Bryan, and Carla who moves into the Henderson household and ends up renting Bryan’s old bedroom. He later applies to work at Brackington’s Bistro alongside Jill, Erica, and Jasmine. This season ends with a Halloween Special, where Zunira the witch is resurrected by her brother and sister, Zeke and Zingella. Zunira gets her revenge by casting a spell on Simsville, enabling everyone’s deepest and darkest fears to come true. Sarah ends up saving the town by encountering Zunira’s spell and making things back to normal. The final scene ends with Ali, who is now a vampire, expressing to Joseph, the vampire king of Simsville, how miserable she’s been as a vampire. Joseph then gets fed of with Ali’s complaining and asks her to leave his mansion. Ali does as he wishes and accidentally steps out into the sunlight, burning her to her death...

#Life In Simsville #LifeInSimsville #LIS #Neon East #NeonEast #Sims 2 #The Sims 2 #sims 2 stories #youtube series #Sims Bustin Out #Urbz Sims In the City #The Urbz #Sims 4 #The Sims 4 #Sims 4 Story #Simsville

[nomattertheoceans]

The 100?

Thank you Nonnie!!! :) 

Top 5 favourite characters:

Echo / Emori / Raven / Murphy / Octavia

Other characters you like:

A lot, actually! Off the top of my head, Lexa, Clarke (although not in the way most people like her, I enjoy her as an anti-hero lmao), Bellamy, Monty, Jasper, Lincoln, Indra!

Least favourite characters:

Aside from the obvious villains obviously, I’m gonna say Kane and Abby. I never really cared for their stories, I’ve hated Abby since season 1 and Kane since s5 there’s just something about them being absolutely awful leaders and blaming kids for their failures that I can’t get behind.

Otps:

Basically lmao.

No but seriously, I think their love story is just great on so many levels, they’re the only love story I really care about in the show.

Other couples I really like are: Bellamy and Echo, Octavia and Lincoln, Octavia and Niylah, Octavia and Diyoza, Murphy and Emori and Raven, Echo and Raven, Jasper and Maya, Monty and Harper

Notps:

..... Bellarke lmao.

I enjoy the dynamic between Bellamy and Clarke, but I never saw it as romantic, and that’s how I enjoyed it. I love their ennemies to reluctant allies dynamic, I love the fact that their relationship is dysfunctional I love the parallels between Clarke and Octavia. But I don’t enjoy it at all as a romantic dynamic.

Favourite friendships:

Monty and Jasper, Octavia and Jasper, Raven and Murphy

Favourite family:

This is almost only found family because this show has a ton of found family dnamics that I love!! The Blake siblings, Spacekru, Octavia Diyoza and Hope, Raven and Finn.

Favourite episodes:

Murphy’s Law, Blood Must have Blood part 1 and part 2, Thirteen, The Chosen, Pramfayia, Red Queen, The Garden

Favourite season/book/movie:

Season 2. It has my favorite version of Lexa, it has Bellamy and Echo meeting, it has the most interesting antagonists (in my opinion haha). Season 4 is a close second though!

Favourite quotes:

“You believe that to defeat an ennemy who will stop at nothing, you must stop at nothing. How is that any different than Blood must have Blood?” - Luna in s3, because I think this quote shows very well the central conflict of the show, one that was established by Finn in s1: We have to try not to repeat history, and yet everytime, they do repeat it. I disagree with Luna in that instance because the threat that was ALI wasn’t like any other, but I agree with her sentiment.

“In peace, may you leave this shore. In love, may you find the next. Safe passage on your travels. Until our final journey to the Ground. May we meet again.” LISTEN. If there’s is one thing of the world building I absolutely adore, it’s the Traveler’s Blessing. It’s a beautiful prayer, and it gives me all the right emotions when I think about it. I was disappointed with what the show was making of it in seasons 2 and 3, with characters saying it all around, but then there are two instances that really get to me: Octavia and Bellamy saying it over the dead radio at the end of s4, and Monty / Bellamy and Clarke saying it at the end of season 5.

Best musical moment:

I loved the way the music carried the scene right after Lexa’s death, how it melts from Lexa’s death and Titus saying his ritual words, to Becca reaching earth, back to Lexa and the Flame coming out of her.

Moment that made you fangirl/boy the hardest:

Oh boy there are a LOT Off the top of my head: when Monty refuses to leave Jasper alone when he gives his blood to Maya, when Murphy says “Touch me again and I’ll end you... in a non-criminal way”, when Becho was confirmed in s5, When Clarke managed to align the satellite dish in Pramfyia, when Octavia confronted Skaikru in The Chosen,.... I can’t think of others right now but there are a lot lmao You can check out my favorite scenes series if you want, I’m working on it slowly!

When it really disappointed you:

A lot of times, honestly... I’m gonna say, all of season 6. I hated it. It had so much potential, with characters having to deal with the aftermath of season 5, Monty and Harper dying, Jordan existing, Wonkru.... Instead we got a whole mess that didn’t do much for any character and I was really disappointed.

Saddest moment:

Lincoln’s death. I knew it was coming because I knew the actor was leaving the show, but I was so NOT READY for it omg it’s the scene I still cry everytime I watch it because it’s so sad and heartwrenching....

Most well done character death:

Okay so I think The 100 is really bad at having well done character deaths, so I’m gonna say my less well-done one lmaoooo

Lexa’s. Her death was so stupid. I wasn’t in the fandom at the time so I wasn’t aware of the awful queerbaiting that was going on, so without talking about BTS and marketing ploys, I do believe that her death was heavily predicted by the show. However, it was a stupid death and Lexa was too awesome a character to die by a stray bullet. She deserved a proper send-off, she deserved to die in an epic battle, or fighting for what she believed in,..... not a bullet. 

Favourite guest star:

I know Shawn Mendes (Mendez? I don’t know lmao i don’t know him) was a guest star but I don’t know any other guest star so I guess that’s my answer lmao

Favourite cast member:

I don’t follow the cast, so I don’t have a favorite xD

Character you wish was still alive:

Jasper and Finn both deserve to still be alive, because the show treated their mental struggles like shit and I’m very bitter about that!

One thing you hope really happens:

Honestly, I don’t know? We have four episodes left of the entire show and I have no idea where it’s headed lmao I guess I hope both Emori and Murphy survive to see the end and have a long and happy life <3

Most shocking twist:

Okay I actually have three so I’ll you my top three:

1- The revelation of the Mountain Men. I was absolutely NOT expecting this to happen and I was gasping and going “nooooooooo way!!!” at my computer because it was so out of nowhere!! I loved it lmao

2- Murphy discovers that ALI destroyed the world: the ending of s2. That scene is so chilling, Murphy watching the video of Chris crying and killing himself, cut with scenes of Jaha getting to the mansion and the wholse scene with ALI herself... that whole scene was really cool and unexpected!

3- Clarke and Jaha steal the bunker during the conclave. I was so SHOOK by this moment, it was such a bold move and I loved it!

When did you start watching/reading?:

Early January, 2015. I was back at my appartment waiting for the semester to start, my roommates weren’t back from the holidays yet, and I was bored. So I started the show, and I binged all of season 1 and half of season 2 in 24 hours xD I caught up at Spacewalker, and then had to wait two weeks for the next episode to air and it was agony!!!!

Best animal/creature:

HELIOS THE BEST HORSE THERE IS

Favourite location:

The Second Dawn Bunker. Yeah I know it’s strange coming from me because I absolutely hate so many things about the bunker xD But it was such a cool location!! With the rotunda/arena, the farm, the huge corridors,.....

Trope you wish they would stop using:

“It’s the end of the world, whatever shall we do???” I’m just tired you guys. Nuclear apocalypses and other bombings should not be that common lmao

One thing this show/book/film does better than others:

I love the fact that it has so many different and well developped female characters.It shouldn’t be rare, but it still is, and this show really stands out to me for that reason. I’m not saying it’s the peak of feminism or anything because lmao IT’S NOT. But the women of the show have agency, freedom, they’re all distinct from one another and not just tropes and cliches. I really like it.

Funniest moments:

Nothing comes to mind right now? I feel like an idiot lmao I have so many moments that make me laugh and I can’t think of a single one right now x)

Couple you would like to see:

I would love to have canon Murphy x Emori x Raven!!

Actor/Actress you want to join the cast:

Nobody haha sorry

Favourite outfit:

Blodreina’s cape thingy!

Favourite item:

Raven’s necklace!!! I’m actually hoping to make myself one someday, it’s my favorite thing ^^

Do you own anything related to this show/book/film?:

Nothing!

What house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in?:

I wish I could be spacekru haha they’re the best found family of the whole show and we deserved a flashback episode for them <3

Most boring plotline:

the entirety of season 6 xDDDDD

No but seriously, I’m gona say Illian’s plot. Honestly I never got into it at all, I didn’t care enough about him, or his family.

Most laughably bad moment:

I mean, the pilot is pretty cringe-worthy xD

Best flashback/flashfoward if any:

the flashbacks of the Dark Year.

Most layered character:

Octavia

Most one dimensional character:

Jordan lmao I was so disappointed with his story in s6.....

Scariest moment:

OMG in season 2 when Bellamy, Octavia and the guards go into the old parking garage and CAROL OF THE BELLS START PLAYING THAT WAS SO FUCKING CREEPY

Grossest moment:

Ewwww the whole worm thing happening in s5, AND the weird trees growing inside people in s6 xD

Best looking male:

S5 Murphy, hands down. Also s7 Murphy cause he spends half his time shirtless lmao

Best looking female:

Emori! She’s so pretty.

Who you’re crushing on (if any):

I mean everybody is gorgeous but I don’t have a particular fixation haha

Favourite cast moment:

I don’t watch interviews or BTS stuff so I don’t know much, but Richard Harmon wearing hie sister’s costume and wig was really funny ^^

Favourite transportation:

Becca’s rocket

Most beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise):

It’s very obvious symbolism, but I love the last shot of Blood must have blood part 1, with Clarke standing alone in front of the door of Mount Weather.

Also, Octavia forcing the clans into submission in Red Queen, the mini conclave in fron of the doors of the vafeteria. The shots in that scene were really good!

Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you:

Lmaooooooo do you have ten hours? Because that’s how long I can ramblr about the inconsistencies and plotholtes of this show x) Off the top of my head:

- Why does everybody on the Ark speak Enlighs?

- If Becca knew Nightblood could let you live on Earth then why didn’t she distribute it among the space stations?

- Why did Cadogan build the bunker in the middle of the city when he had a prefectly good FOREST??

- If Lexa is the first Commander to unite the clans then what was the role of the Commander before her?

- Why didn’t the Ark send one adult with the 100 (Pyke) to protect and help them?

- How come the Eligius IV prisoners don’t die when they come back to Earth in s5 since they have no nightblood and didn’t adapt through evolution?

- How is it that Spacekru survived with algea alone but Wonkru had to have this huge variety of plants?? WHAT’S THE MAGIC ALGEA MONTY???

- Why did Mount Weather crash the Exodus ship?

- If the ressources on the Ark are so scarce then why would they float people with clothes on them?

- How come Raven could visit Finn in prison but Bellamy couldn’t visit Octavia?? If Octavia was in solitary, why?

...... Okay i’m gonna stop for now lmao but I could write an entire memoir on the inconsistencies of this show lmao

Best promo:

That one:

At what point did you fall in love with this show/book: 

I’m thinking Murphy’s Law? The first few episodes were a little too teenage-drama for me but this episode shifted my opinion enough to get me to keep watching ^^

#the 100 #Anonymous #Asks

[humanistauno]

Chris Evans’ Life Behind The Limelight

by: Matt Basco

Chris Evans is an American actor best known for playing comic book superhero Captain America on the big screen.

Early Life

Christopher Robert Evans was conceived on June 13, 1981, in Boston, Massachusetts, and brought up in the close by town of Sudbury. While his father, Robert, gave monetary solidness as a dental specialist, Evans and his three kin were attracted to the performing expressions universe of their mom, Lisa, an artist turned Youth Theater chief. As Evans reviewed, "We resembled the von Trapps [from The Sound of Music], all singing and moving."

A characteristic competitor, Evans wrestled and played lacrosse at Lincoln-Sudbury Regional High School, when not put resources into his school or network theater. He spent the late spring before his senior year of secondary school interning for a throwing organization in New York City, making significant contacts and sharpening his aptitudes at the Lee Strasberg Institute. Anxious to restore, the hopeful entertainer sped through his senior year to graduate a half semester in front of his cohorts.

Who Is Chris Evans?

Brought up in the Boston zone, Chris Evans handled his first significant film job in the parody Not another Teen Movie. He played the Human Torch in two Fantastic Four flicks, however the ball was in his court as another superhuman that moved him to notoriety in the immensely fruitful Captain America and The Avengers blockbusters. Evans additionally earned praise for his exhibition in the tragic Snowpiercer, and made a generally welcomed Broadway debut in 2018.

Movies

'Captain America' and 'the Avengers'

In July 2011, Evans joined the burgeoning Marvel Cinematic Universe Empire with Captain America: The First Avenger. As Steve Rogers, the scrawny but dutiful serviceman who undergoes a massive physical transformation to become the titular super soldier, Evans capably displayed the earnestness central to his character, along with the eye-popping physique and fighting skills requisite for a modern action star. The First Avenger was just the start of the MCU run for Evans, who joined Robert Downey Jr.'s Iron Man, Chris Hemsworth's Thor and other big-name actors, both in and out of costume, for the superhero blockbuster The Avengers (2012). Evans went on to headline the sequels of his own Captain America franchise with The Winter Soldier (2014) and Civil War (2016), while also leading the charge for The Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015) and surfacing in other Marvel features, like Ant-Man (2015) and Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017). Initially reluctant to wield the Captain's shield due to the extended commitment, Evans was ready to move on by the time his contract drew to a close, with Avengers: Infinity War (2018) and Avengers: Endgame (2019) showcasing his final performances as America's super solider.

Early Roles

'Not another Teen Movie' and 'Cellular'

Evans first major film role came in Not another Teen Movie (2001), a spoof of high school dramas like She's All that (1999) and earlier predecessors. As football star Jake Wyler, he follows the formulaic procedure of accepting a bet to date the nerdy, glasses-wearing girl, delivering a silly highlight by squirting on the whipped cream bikini made famous by Ali Larter in Varsity Blues (1999). He followed with another high school comedy, The Perfect Score (2004), as part of a group of students who steal the answers to an SAT exam, and then the action-thriller Cellular (2004), where he showed his future leading man chops by helping to rescue Kim Basinger from her captors.

'Fantastic Four' and 'Scott Pilgrim'

Other Comic Adaptations Prior to his star-making turn in Captain America, Evans went the superhero route for Fantastic Four (2005), as Johnny Storm/Human Torch. The film was a commercial success, but a downturn at the box office for Rise of the Silver Surfer (2007), along with another round of largely negative reviews, led to the cancellation of a third installment.

Returning to comic-sourced material, Evans provided voice work for the animated TMNT (2007), as the boyfriend of the Ninja Turtles' colleague, April O'Neil. He later co-starred in the action comedy The Losers (2010), which drew mixed reviews despite a strong cast, and landed a supporting role in the entertaining Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010), as an over-the-top version of the Hollywood action hero he had become. Meanwhile, the actor took advantage of the all-American good looks and charm that made him a natural for romantic comedies. He played the "Harvard Hottie" of past and future co-star Scarlett Johannson in The Nanny Diaries (2007), before becoming the ideal match for Anna Faris in what’s Your Number? (2011).

Drama and Sci-Fi

'London' and 'Sunshine'

Coming off his early teen films, Evans showed he could handle weightier fare with London (2005), as a junkie struggling to get over his ex-girlfriend. He later took on Tennessee Williams in The Loss of a Teardrop Diamond (2008), with Bryce Dallas Howard, and portrayed a real-life lawyer and drug addict who goes after the pharmaceutical industry in Puncture (2010).

'Iceman' and 'Snowpiercer'

Despite his Marvel commitments requiring much of his energy, Evans found the time for other screen projects to his liking. Iceman (2012) gave him the chance to overturn his squeaky-clean superhero image as a contract killer who assists Michael Shannon's sadistic hitman. Snowpiercer (2013) placed him back in leading man territory, albeit as an antihero in a dystopian future.

'The Red Sea Diving Resort’ and 'Knives Out'

Evans next starred as an Israeli agent in The Red Sea Diving Resort (2019), based on the real-life rescue and transport of Ethiopian Jews to Israel in 1981. Late that year, he again distanced himself from the wholesome superhero image by playing an obnoxious playboy in the murder-mystery Knives Out.

Net Worth

Evans checks in at a cool $70 million, according to Celebrity Net Worth. The bulk of his fortune has come from his Marvel Cinematic involvement, though it took a little while to get there, after reportedly receiving a relatively modest $300,000 for his first Captain America movie.

Romantic Life and Girlfriends

Evans was involved in an on-and-off relationship with actress Jenny Slate after they got to know one another on the set of The Gifted. The couple spent the 2017 holiday season together, though they reportedly split for good a few months later. Earlier in his career, from 2001 to 2006, Evans was in a long-term relationship with Jessica Biel. He has also been linked to actresses Minka Kelly and Lily Collins.

Chris Evans's Height and Workout

At 6 feet tall but naturally slim, Evans displayed the results of long hours in the gym while progressing from the rangy jock of Not another Teen Movie, to the beefier Human Torch of Fantastic Four, to the cartoonishly muscular Captain America. Packing on the pounds was vital to the appearance of his laboratory-enhanced superhero, prompting a training regimen that included high-weight reps of squats, deadlifts and incline bench presses, as well as bodyweight exercises like dips and pull-ups. By the time of The Winter Soldier, he had incorporated gymnastics and plyometrics to his routine for more speed and agility, aiding his efforts in such scenes as when he beats up a group of men in a crowded elevator.

TV Shows

Sent to Los Angeles by his agent in the late 1990s to audition for a show called Get Real (where he met Anne Hathaway), Evans instead wound up with a supporting role on Opposite Sex, alongside Milo Ventimiglia, as one of the few boys to attend a former all-girls academy. The teen comedy-drama lasted for only eight episodes in the summer of 2000, but still provided vital exposure for its young stars. Evans went on to make appearances in The Fugitive, Skin and the popular Boston Public. In 2008, with his successful film career well under way, he provided voice work for Adult Swim's stop-motion series Robot Chicken.

[constantlyirksome]

In Euphoria 1x03: Rue Gets a Grip, and Kat Loses Hers.

This week’s Euphoria got really weird in a few different ways, with certain scenes dabbling in the surreal, and we get a glimpse at some of the weird things people on the internet get off to which I fully believe are real. Craziest of all, a drug dealer takes a moral high ground.

After Rue’s near-miss last week with a dangerous dealer and some harder drugs than she’s used to, she and everyone around her take notice of what this downward spiral means for her, and where she’ll end up if she doesn’t stop. The show makes a socially conscious choice to stop glamourizing or romanticizing drug use (that was kind of the idea in the premier) and drives home some harsh truths to both Rue and any impressionable viewers. Rue’s mum, Jules, even her dealer Fezco all make efforts to stop Rue from destroying herself, but it’s the words from a fellow Narcotics Anonymous member whose words carry the most weight.

Ali is first seen watching skeptically Rue claims her 60 day chip, rightfully not believing she’d been sober that long. He even knew she was on something while she was on stage. After a few probing questions about Rue’s overdose, who found her (her sister) and how (passed out and seizing), he drives his point hard…

“You got me thinking about what that does to a thirteen-year-old, what that moment would do to somebody, how it affects their life, how they form relationships, fall in love, living with the fear that at any moment the rug could be ripped out from under them…”

The speech is chilling, delivered almost casually by Colman Domingo. In a sea of pleas for Rue to cut the bullshit, this one is the most convincing and based in experience. It’s Jules that Rue ultimately wants to get clean for, not her family or herself, which could be seen as romantic but really isn’t. The slightest dent in their relationship, a tiny fight, sends Rue spinning back to score from her dealer.

There’s a lot of strain on Rue and Jule’s budding friendship already, Rue’s sobriety, her crush on her friend, Jule’s relationship with a guy she’s never met. It’s messy but there’s purity there, two weirdos bonding on the fringe. They have really sweet moments, but ultimatums and secrets are no way to build a friendship. (Still rooting for them though.)

The end of the episode has Rue at Fezco’s door to take some of her pain after kissing Jules and bolting. Fez, however, denies her entry and refuses to sell anymore to Rue. She rightfully pointed out that he was the one selling to her from the start, and she’s in the position she’s in because of him. It’s a true statement born out of desperation, which eventually turns into insults and then pleas. It’s as raw and wild as Zendaya has played so far and it was a breathtaking, heartbreaking thing to watch. It does make you think, while Fez isn’t actively abusing women or doing any of the other heinous things every other male character is doing, he’s not faultless. He has played a huge role in Rue’s downfall and probably the downfall of many others as well. Shutting Rue out however might lead to a redemption arc worth watching.

The other leading lady this episode was Kat, who is discovering her power through her sexuality. Now I want to stop to say, she’s underage so all of her actions are suspect, especially since she condemned child porn last week. But it was still highly entertaining to watch her morph into this badass, who’s discovering men ain’t shit so she may as well make some money off of them. She buys new outfits, posts videos and kinky photos. Things get super weird when she does her first Skype-cam-session-thing with a very awkward man in a diaper who likes it when she makes fun of his tiny junk. It’s disturbing and amusing, and creepy. All of these things register on Kat’s face. You remember not only is this her first time being confronted like that, but this guy is exposing himself (unknowingly) to a minor. This is where Euphoria skirts around what’s taboo and what’s expectable when it comes to portraying teen sexuality. It comes down to personal values and experience but scenes like this have a big chance of pushing an audience member away entirely. You wouldn’t be wrong to be creeped out, or triggered. You have to ask yourself is this teaching us anything about sex that we didn’t already know or are they just being gross.

This episode pulled back a bit (Skype guy excluded), which made it a bit more entertaining. Some beautiful editing also offset the darkness, music, and the adding of some creative/absurd elements took the sting out of what was happening to Rue. Kat’s past as the leader of 1D Harry/Luis shippers is hysterical, and the actual anime-style footage of a Larry fanfic was both uncomfortable and transfixing. Her dream of her tumblr followers coming to save her from her mundane school like warriors was sad but relatable and beautifully shot and edited. It took away some of her cool factor, reminded us of her age but in a positive way, that not everything in high school is super dark.

The episodes highlight comes from another strange scene, a cutaway where Rue gives a classroom-based lecture on the ins and outs (and in agains) of dick pics. Categorising the horrifying, terrifying, and acceptable. I fully want to take a semester of classes where Zendaya teaches me lessons such as these. How to avoid Charlie Mansons and sword wielders, and how to find and appreciate the perfect dick pic.

Net week will probably move the focus back to Jule’s story with Nate and his dad, which is dicey territory but this episode gave me a bit of hope that, while not perfect, Euphoria is a little better equipped to deal with these issues than we first thought.

#reviews #euphoria #zendaya #zendaya coleman #hunter schafer #rue #jules

[kee-writestrashh]

To Marry a Bastard

Ramsay Bolton x reader

ao3

summary:  Before there were the Bastard’s Bitches, the Black Sheep, the Wicked Ones, and the Red King’s to worry about there was only the Bastard’s Boys. Before there was a bun in the oven there was a possessive, obsessive love. There was raw emotion. There was a rowdy group of men who frequented a small, hole in wall, bar…. There was something evil behind that smirk. But there was also something needing and wanting behind those cold blue eyes.

**prequel to Guns for Hire

Chap 1 

Chapter 2: Jealousy Suits You Like a Tailored Cut

Damon was talking, but Ramsay wasn't listening as he watched her laugh and joke with men at the counter.

He was surprised at himself for feeling jealous at these men. He'd like to hear them all scream and beg and apologize for talking to her.

But that man was going to die. Ramsay had already decided it as he watched the man take (Y/n)'s hand and talk her into a dance. He felt the heat creep up his neck and the fire burn in his chest as he watched her twirl on the dance floor.

She was his. She just didn't know it yet. He would be the last thing to ever cross her path before she ended up a bruised and broken floating body in the river.

"Yo, I'm talking to you." Damon said, following Ramsay's gaze.

Ramsay shook his head slightly and turned to look at Damon, "Sup?"

"Dude, just go talk to her. Give her your number. Easy. How many times have you done this?" Damon chuckled, watching Ramsay closely.

He noticed the flush in Ramsay's cheeks at his words and put on a smug grin. About damn time. Fuck.

"Not today." Ramsay hummed, watching (Y/n) return behind the bar and pour herself a shot. He gave a sweeping glance around the bar and saw the dancing man pull a coat on to leave.

He stood abruptly.

"Where you going?" Damon asked, watching Ramsay dig in his pockets.

"I'll be back." Ramsay said, following the man out.

The man had disappeared into the mist, but Ramsay found his drunk ass easy enough.

He grabbed the man from behind and dragged him to the alley.

The man struggled and writhed under Ramsay's grip, but Ramsay's hold was too tight around the man's neck. He couldn't even pass noises as he gasped for air.

Ramsay released him, picked him up by the front of the shirt, and slammed his against the wall.

"That woman in there. You grabbed her ass when you were dancing with her." Ramsay growled.

"H-hey man. Look, if... if she's like your girl friend or something I'm sorry. I didn't know..." the man sputtered.

His fear annoyed Ramsay even more.

"You're damn right you're sorry, you fucking cunt." Ramsay hissed, digging in his pockets again for his knife.

But he realized he didn't have it. It was still on the coffee table, next to the bottle of antidepressant pills he had picked up this afternoon. He may have hated going to the psych, but she prescribed all kinds of drugs. Drugs with value that he could sell.

He cast around, seeing an empty bottle. Well, it was better than nothing.

He kneed the man in the stomach and released him, where he collapsed to the ground with a groan.

Ramsay grabbed up the beer bottle and busted it against the wall until he had a decently sized piece of glass he could use to stab deep enough to cause slow, excruciating pain.

He glanced around to make sure no one around could see or hear.

He smirked, kneeling down beside his newest victim. He placed his palm against the man's throat, pushing down until the man couldn't breath and began to struggle.

Ramsay struck hard, and furiously, feeling the anger burst. He made a few more hard thrusts with the glass into the man's side, pushing down harder and harder on his throat until he felt the man's life slide away.

Ramsay stood up straight, glancing down at the glass, trying to think what to do with it. He couldn't just throw it. He ran his eyes over the dead man, a triumphant glow blazing in his chest. The feeling of anger lifted. He felt light and.... well, he couldn't place the other feelings.

"Fuck it." He smiled, kneeling down, cutting a deep X across the man's neck, and using the man's shirt to wipe the glass clean, before he wrapped his hand in the bottom of his own shirt; feeling awkward at the angle he had to kneel to take the glass in his wrapped hand bury it the dead man's gut until there was nothing left of it.

He stood up, staring at the dead body, trying to decide what to do with it. He should have planned a little better. This wasn't usually like him.

But, fuck it, right?

He turned on his heel to go fund Damon and dispose of this stupid fuck. He slipped into the bar and spotted Damon, chatting it up with some whore.

×××(y/n)×××

"Hey, when you goin' home?"

"Dunno, Oly. I'm drowning in tips tonight. That guy I danced with, gave me fifty for a single dance. Maybe i should be a stripper." You said, pointing to your full, waist apron with a wide smile.

"Well, get out of here. Quit stealing my money." Oly quipped.

"Oh shut up. I've still got an hour." You said, glancing over the floor and seeing two guys in a corner near the exit bicker about something.

The shorter guy was talking animatedly with his hands, an arrogant smirk on his face.

"So, I heard you are quitting school?" Olyvar said, drying a glass and placing it under the counter.

"Yeah, maybe. I dunno. I'm pretty burnt out. And I can't really afford it anymore. Just too expensive and I don't like living paycheck to paycheck. Ya know? If I quit school and focus all my time and energy here I can make enough to live comfortably." You shrugged. "Going to finish this semester and then take the next off, and see how I feel after that."

"I understand. I'm happy with my little baby associate's. At least I got something, ya know? Did I tell you, my mom tried to get a hold of me?" Olyvar said, leaning against the counter, watching the nearby patrons.

"Uh, no guy. You did not." You said, turning to a man at the counter who asked for a dozen jello shots.

"Yeah. She was all like, Oly, you know your father and I love you, even if we don't agree with your life choices." Olyvar laughed, almost bitterly you noted.

You placed a tray on the table and reached for the tiny refrigerator under the counter, stooping down to grab up 12 jello shots. You placed them on the tray and took the cash, "And what did you say?"

"I said, 'well mom, is that what dad said'? And she just kinda gave me this sad look. And I was like, fuck it. If you guys can't accept me for who I am, then why bother coming around?" Olyvar said, pulling a towel from his shoulder to wipe spilled alcohol off the counter.

"I'm sorry, Oly. What are you working this week? I haven't looked at the schedule." You said, hoping to drive the subject away from parents before he asked you about yours.

It wasn't that you didn't love your parents. Complete opposite. You loved them. But it had been five years now since you had left home. You had only seen your parents a couple times in that time frame. But you just... you couldn't. You were out of that damn town, and you would never go back. It always felt like a stab in the heart when you thought about everything you had left behind. Your parents. Your best friends. Your little brother. All of the rumors that had sprung up after your hasty departure.

You sighed, glancing around the bar.

"I'm with you all week. So, how about that guy who asked you to dance?" Olyvar said, watching you closely.

"I dunno where he went. Musta left. He was nice though. Kinda cute. And he was a good dancer. He didn't step on my feet. Maybe I'll flirt it up with him if he comes back." You grinned.

"When's the last time you had sex?" Olyvar asked, mixing up shots for a group of people in front of him.

"I can't remember honestly. I don't have time. I'm either here, or doing homework." You shrugged, grabbing the empty lemon tray to cut up more.

"Oh whatever. You need to have a wild night of sex. You look miserable, and I'm tired of you looking so down." Olyvar said, rinsing out the empty tumbler.

"Yeah, well, I don't wanna let just anyone in my pants. I'm tired of being picked up by drunks. I'd like a serious, casual relationship." You said, taking a lemon and pouring a shot of tequila.

"Serious casual. Does that even make sense?" Olyvar laughed.

You slammed the empty glass down on the counter, making a face as you bit into the lemon, and shrugged.

"Maybe not. But that's what I want. So I will be lonely, until someone gets me on that level." You said, dropping the lemon in the trash.

"So, forever then." Olyvar chuckled, climbing up on the counter, "Hey guys! Who wants to take my lovely girl home tonight? She likes her hair pulled and hasn't had sex in weeks! She gets off in thirty!"

There were many hoots, jeers, and catcalls.

"OLY!" You said, pulling him down from the counter. "I'm not a whore! Don't advertise me as one!" You hissed, embarrassment flooding your cheeks, as you fumbled around in your apron for a cigarette.

"Hon, you need a dick to sit on.  Find someone and come back looking happier tomorrow." Olyvar grinned at you.

You gave him a cold glare. "My hand works just fine, and doesn't smell like a bottle of Jim Beam."

"Doesn't smell like a bottle of Jim Beam. Gold right there." Olyvar grinned.

"Hey baby, wanna dance?" A man asked, with a wolfish grin and a wink.

You had to admit, he was pretty cute.

"I'm nobody's baby." You said, giving him a glacial stare.

"You could be mine." He pressed, leaning closer to you over the counter.

"Not interested." You replied in a cross tone.

"Oh come on. You're a pretty little thing." He said, reaching out to take your hand.

You pulled your hand back, balled your fist, but relaxed it and slapped him instead.

Olyvar grabbed you before you could climb over the counter.

"Alright. You're throwing in the towel there, Ali. Go home."

You pulled away from Olyvar and stormed to the back room, grabbing up your purse and keys.

You signed the clipboard to end your shift.

xxxRamsayxxx

With a grunt Ramsay and Damon pushed the dead body over the side of the bridge.

Neither said a word as they watched the body crash through the surface of the water.

"Well, I feel better. Let's go get stoned and eat cereal." Ramsay chuckled, walking back to Damon's car and sitting in the passengers seat.

"You are a crazy motherfucker. You know that?" Damon said, falling into his seat.

"You might have mentioned it to me a time or two." Ramsay chuckled, lighting a cigarette.

"Sooo..." Damon said, taking Ramsay's lighter to light his own cigarette.

"So what?" Ramsay hummed.

"(y/n). Whatcha think?" Damon said, watching Ramsay from the corner of his eye.

Ramsay cleared his throat. "Dunno. She doesn't look like a whore. Put the Boys on her tail. Make sure no one talks to her or touches her."

"Dude, you can't expect that. She can't just not talk to people because of some dude she doesn't even know exists." Damon said seriously.

"Do what I said, Damon. Or you will end up in the river with her." Ramsay said, taking a deep drag.

"You're going to kill her?" Damon asked with a deep frown.

"Possibly. Guess we will just have to see." Ramsay shrugged as if it were no more than talking about the weather.

Damon huffed, turning the radio up.

"What if she's as crazy as you are?" Damon asked, passing the joint to Ramsay.

Ramsay took a hit, holding it in as best he could, before giving into the coughing fit.

"There isn't anyone as crazy as me." He sighed, exhaling the smoke.

"There has to be. Everyone has that one person who challenges them. Ya know, in a good way." Damon said, running his tongue along his finger to stop the run in the joint.

"Well I doubt it would be her anyways." Ramsay said, standing from his seat. "I'm going to take a shower and go to bed. Have to go meet Dom in the morning at the bank."

"Right on man. Catch ya sometime tomorrow. I'm going to crash right here." Damon hummed, setting the joint in the ashtray.

"Just pick up your mess." Ramsay said with a dismissive wave.

"Yessir." Damon nodded, relaxing into the couch and finger the remote closer to him.

Ramsay fell into bed, punching the pillow into a more comfortable position and staring up at the ceiling. What if Damon had a point? Was there a woman out there who could keep up with him? Someone to challenge him and love him through his psychotic mentality?

Little did he know, across town there was a woman who was also laying in her bed, wondering if there was anyone out there that was worth the trouble. Someone who wouldn't bore her. Someone who could give her the world and play along with all her dark ideas and wants.

#kee-writestrashh #to marry a bastard #tmab #prequel #pre guns for hire #guns for hire #gfh #the bastard's boys part 1 #chapter 2 #ramsay bolton x reader #ramsay bolton/reader #ramsay bolton #ramsay bolton fic #modern ramsay bolton #ramsay bolton imagine #modern au #Modern Setting #game of thrones modern au #got modern au #game of thrones fanfic #game of thrones fanfiction

[imagineshere-forall]

Jason Dilaurentis Imagine

Pairing: Jason Dilaurentis x Reader

Warnings: one use of the word f*cking

Word Count: 1075

Request: Hi, can it be that Jason Dilaurentis is jealous of Noel Kahn as the reader is spending a lot of time with him tauriqua

A/N I'm from England so I have no idea how being a lab partner works so just go with it. 

----

You and Jason had been dating a long time but it was never easy dating him as he was older than you, meaning you didn't go to school together. You weren't constantly being hit on, but being a part of Ali's clique you were somehow always in the spotlight.

As you arrived into your biology class you could see students were all crowded around a list. You quickly remembered that this week marked the start of partner projects. With your small body you were able to push your way to the front, although you sort of had wished you didn't. As your eyes descended down the list you could see all your friends being paired up together, and you already knew you wouldn't be with any of your friends.

Aria Montgomery & Spencer Hastings

Hanna Montgomery & Sean Ackard

Alison Dilaurentis & Emily Fields

Y/N Y/L/N & Noel Kahn

Before you and Jason, you and Noel had a sort of on and off again relationship, and it had been awkward ever since. You slowly turned round to be met with a smirking Noel behind you. You just sighed and sat followed Noel to the desk.

As your teacher droned on about the projects you just began to daydream staring out the window, trying your best to avoid the awkward tension between you and your ex-boyfriend who seemed to be on top of the world at the thought of being partnered with you.

Of course, being lab partners meant you guys had to spend lots of time together. In the semester you had to complete numerous experiments and evaluations.

For as long as you could, you had avoided doing the lab projects as you'd rather spend time with Jason, you still contributed work but tried your hardest to avoid Noel.

Two weeks before the end of the semester you were called into the office of your biology teacher.

"Y/N it has come to my attention that you're not contributing as much work to the project as Mr. Kahn" the teacher spoke trying to be as professional as possible. You knew full well he is only doing this as Noel's parents donate a lot of money to the school.

"I'm still doing the work sir, just not with Noel and sending him my results," the teacher did not seem impressed with your response. He just droned on about how you need to learn to work together despite your differences.

As you exited the office of the biology teacher, you went straight into someone's chest, a common occurrence due to your small height. You looked up and saw Noel smirking once again.

"Do you want a lift to mine?" the smugness in his voice made you roll your eyes.

While Noel was driving you got your phone out and messaged Jason

Gonna have to take a rain check tonight, got stuck at school, sorry babe

You got a reply reasonably quickly

That's okay, see you tomorrow <3

You smiled at your phone, loving how understanding Jason could be. Noel looked over at you as he was driving.

"You okay?" he said smirking at you

"Just telling my boyfriend that we have to take a rain check," you spoke bitterly. After the messy break up between you two, you had never been able to be just friends again.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he spoke, he seemed to be at a loss of words. He hadn't expected you to move on so soon.

"It doesn't matter, lets just get this project over with"

-

After the long journey out of town to Noel's luxurious house, you walked in, still too familiar with the layout getting yourself a drink.

You guys had finally finished your work and and Noel drove you home. This was the pattern for over a week and a half. You had to keep cancelling dates with Jason.

On this day when you got home Jason was sat outside your house, it looked like he had just arrived as he just sat down as you pulled up.

"Thanks for the ride," you smiled as you got out the car rushing towards Jason being engulfed in his arms.

Jason looked behind you seeing Noel's car pull away, his jaw instantly clenching.

"Have you been spending all this time with him?" he said, trying his best not to sound jealous. You just nodded in response as your head was buried in his chest.

You took Jason inside and you sat and watched some films on your sofa. You couldn't help but notice how tense Jason was as you were curled up together. Leaning forward you paused the TV and turned round in Jason's lap so you were facing him. He looked up at you and rest his hands on your thighs which were either side of his legs.

"What's up, you've been in a grump since Noel dropped me off?" you questioned, playing with his fingers that were resting on your thighs.

"Nothing," he spoke, with a straight face. It all began to click in your head, he had been like this since Noel had dropped you off.

"Are you jealous of Noel?" you spoke smirking, his jaw just clenched in response. You knew you had hit the nail on the head.

"Babe, you have nothing to be jealous of," you reassured him

"It's just frustrating, you guys go to school together, I'm older than you and we get funny looks when we go out on dates. It's only a matter of time before you find someone your own age." He spoke, not making eye contact.

"First off, you're making yourself sound like an old man, you're only 4 years older than me," you said smiling, holding his hands tightly. "Second, I wouldn't be with you if I didn't think I really loved you,"

His eyes lit up at the last part of your sentence. He took his hand from yours and rested them on the top of your thighs, slightly on your bum. He smiled and leant up to kiss you.

"I love you so fucking much Y/N Y/L/N"

#pretty little liars #pretty little liars imagines #jason dilaurentis #jason dilaurentis imagine #noel kahn #noel kahn imagine #pretty little liars smut #pretty little liars fluff

[mattteoflorenzi]

Druck Translation: 16 You know nothing!

Doctor: Oh, so many?

M: This is Kiki. She’s here today because she’s going to have her first time and wants to know about contraception.

K: I want the pill.

Doc: So, sex. Yes. Good. Ok. How old are you?

K: Really old, seventeen.

Doc: I was 26 and in my last semester of university back then. Yes, Ali. He worked at the open-late convenience store, with integrated video store, there were lots of those stores back then. And then, on our first date, he had got the worst rash from his pineapple cocktail. On his entire body, nettle rash. A really unpleasant disease, I’m telling you. And then we went to the hospital and I got him some cortisone. The thankfulness in his eyes because the itching stopped. We made love right then and there.

S: Mega cute!

K: And? Did it hurt? Did it bleed?

Doc: Well, yeah, a little bit. But Ali’s heart was bleeding even more. I left him there like a stomped out cigarette.

S: By the way, fun fact: My cousin was bleeding so hard that she had to go to the hospital.

Doc: Yeah, that can happen if one has got too few thrombocytes, or is a bleeder. Then you can even die from it. Well, yes, then grab some. Yes, not too few. 

K: Tutti frutti?

Doc: You’ll get the prescription at the front desk.

K: Thank you.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

H: Is it Friday already?

Dad: No, I only got my running shoes.

H: Hi.

Dad: Everything alright with you?

H: Yes, everything’s good. And with you?

Dad: Everything’s good. And, how did it go?

H: What?

Dad: Math?

H: 4 points.

Dad: Ok.

H: Can we please talk about something else? I really got other things to worry about.

Dad: But I thought you had a breakthrough at tutoring?

H: I did! But then there were these weird text problems, where everything’s different again, and then I just don’t get it anymore.

Dad: Jeez, Hanna, you’re not in middle school anymore where you can just learn everything by heart. You have to learn how to think around the corner.

H: Maybe I’m just too stupid to think around the corner. Ever think about that?

Dad: Hanna stop it, it’s childish. I know that you’re all under a lot of pressure.

H: You know nothing.

Dad: What’s that supposed to mean?

H: You know what I mean.

Dad: Hanna, that’s not fair. If you’re going to give me a bd conscience every time it fits into your book, then we’ll end the project ‘living alone’ and you’re coming with us to Spandau. So, what is it I don’t know then?

H: That I have a boyfriend, for example.

Dad: From school? That’s great! And, is it something serious?

H: No, we’re in an open relationship.

Dad: Wow.

H: Of course it’s something serious.

Dad: And can i meet this serious boyfriend?

H: The serious boyfriend is coming over for dinner tomorrow.

Dad: Tomorrow... Ines has yoga and I’m supposed to look after the little one. But, whatever, yeah, she’ll have to cancel yoga this one time then. I’ll be there.

#druck #druck translation #God i loved the scene at the gyn although it actually wasn't that realistic #and this is exactly how i imagined hanna's dad so kudos at the casting director #also the song at the beginning Killed Me

[mearnsblog]

The Disney Quarantine Binge

Hello friends.

What’s baseball? Who knows. I’ve never heard of it. Thanks to the awful COVID-19 pandemic, it’s basically not a thing anymore! The world needs to get a whole lot better before we can even remotely consider the return of any kind of sport, aside from re-broadcasts of “Slippery Stairs: College Tour” on ESPN 8: The Ocho (that really happened, bless it).

In its absence, Ali and I have turned to Disney+ to patch in many hours of the void. We had just watched “Ratatouille,” and I suggested that our next movie could be one of the Disney films I remembered from childhood. We thought about a few different options and ultimately came down on the decision to just watch them all, starting all the way back at the beginning with “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.” We’re going to have a lot of free time and we had just watched the “Imagineering” documentary as well as a slew of other YouTube videos detailing Disney’s wild history, so why not?

It’s hard to write much about baseball right now, so I’m writing about Disney. Specifically, I’m going to use this binge to compile my personal ranking of all 58 films that fall under the category of “Walt Disney Animation Studio films.” Look, the internet clearly needed another idiot throwing some dumb listicle of his own thoughts out there. No need to thank me personally.

I make no promises about how much I’m going to write about each of these movies, mainly because I’m mostly just shooting from the hip and some of these films really don’t require that much thought. Also, I’m just doing this because I want to, and sometimes, it helps to take your mind off serious things. But I will update this post with my rankings as I go, if not only for convenience.

Onward.

1. “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs” (1937)

The one that started it all. For all of Walt Disney’s personal faults, it’s hard not to admire the personal gumption that it took to pull this movie off. No one thought a full-length animated movie could work, and it went way over budget. Disney had to mortgage his house to pay for it all, but he and his team (including his always-overlooked financial expert of a brother, Roy) did it, and damn it if it wasn’t spectacular.

Is “Snow White” dated? Of course it is, it came out before World War II. (It’s No. 1 as I’m writing this list now and only going through the early Disney flicks, but I can guarantee that it will not be No. 1 for terribly long.) Snow White herself is not very interesting, and the prince is a joke. That’s partially because the early Disney studio found it difficult to animate him much, so some potential storylines for the prince got cut. It is what it is.

The queen, though, is an elite Disney villain, and my grandma still remembers the thrill of being frightened by her when she saw “Snow White” for the first time. The animation is admirable, especially as Snow White scrambles for her life through the forest to whatever kind of safety she can find, and when the dwarfs join with the animals to chase down the witch. Speaking of the dwarfs, they are classic Disney sidekicks for a reason and quickly earn the audience’s love. Grumpy’s evolution in particular from being so misogynist that Disney himself referred to him as “Grumpy the woman hater” to openly weeping at Snow White’s apparent death is lovely.

It had been a long time since I revisited “Snow White,” and I probably won’t again for quite some time. Nonetheless, I’m glad I did.

Best song: “Heigh-Ho”

2. “Fantasia” (1940)

Every music teacher's favorite "concert's over and now we have to kill time until the semester ends" movie, aside from maybe "Mr. Holland's Opus." I was pumped to rewatch "Fantasia," and its peaks did not disappoint.

Stravinsky's "Rite of Spring" is always incredible, and I always forget just how many familiar tunes are packed into "The Nutcracker Suite." That was a fun little delight. However, I also forgot just how much "Toccata and Fugue" and especially "Dance of the Hours" can feel like a drag. The visuals helped the former go by; the latter was a slog.

"Sorcerer's Apprentice" is a classic and that sequence is all over Disney lore for a reason. "Pastoral Symphony" almost suffers from the same drag as "Toccata and Fugue," but the Greek mythology nerd in me appreciates the effort of the visuals. (At the same time, centaurettes? Uh, okey dokey.)

Anyway, all these words have just been a preamble to this: I love everything about "Night on Bald Mountain" and "Ave Maria." They could not have picked a better combination to end this feature. Everything about it is perfect, from the creepiness of the demon Chernabog to the monks' glowing lights restoring some calm to the chaos.

Without that one-two punch at the end, "Fantasia" might be forgotten as a feature and really only remembered for "Sorcerer's Apprentice." Thankfully, that's not the case, and the finale will keep bringing me back.

Best song: "Night on Bald Mountain"

3. “Pinocchio” (1940)

So. "Pinocchio." It's an experience.

I almost want to leave it there. It's so weird. I still adore "When You Wish Upon a Star" and just about everything to do with Jiminy Cricket. But it really just hustles through so many bizarre situations in the blink of an eye.

There's everything uncomfortable with Stromboli. There's everything to do with Pleasure Island, not the least of which involves some creepy old man that Honest John just happens to know. Pinocchio manages to escape yet again, only to have the climax of the movie take place inside a whale that ate Geppetto (and his poor cat and fish, who weren't initially involved with Geppetto's search).

Pinocchio's just not that likable. I know he's supposed to be a kid and kids can be annoying, but man. It's rough. Geppetto deserved better.

If this movie was released much later in the Disney pantheon, it would not be nearly as well-remembered. Oh well. Thankfully, the animation is stunningly beautiful for the time and Jiminy still rules. What a gem.

Best song: "When You Wish Upon a Star"

4. “Dumbo” (1941)

"Dumbo” is such a strange movie. It’s not even bad, and it’s over in the blink of an eye. (The run time is barely an hour, which is definitely appreciated.) It does have those same pacing problems as “Pinocchio” and “Bambi,” which also hit many of those early Disney movies. He shows up, he gets bullied, his mom freaks out, he gets bullied again, he gets drunk (!), he chats with the poorly-aged crows, and then he flies at the circus to end the movie. Hooray? There’s moving quickly though scenes, and then there’s slapping them all together with very few transitions. That’s the issue.

I have a love/hate relationship with “Elephants on Parade.” It’s such a crazy tangent for the movie to take in its short run time, but it’s entertaining as it is surreal. We were not a “Dumbo” household growing up, so for the longest time, the only things I knew about the movie were “When I See An Elephant Fly” and this sequence. I’ll probably still be thinking about it when I’m 80.

Timothy Mouse is a very nice not-quite Jiminy guide to the hero. He seems like a fine gent to share in some champagne-infused bucket water. That’s the good stuff. (Unlike the other elephants outside of Mrs. Jumbo. They’re awful and learn basically nothing.)

Anyway, at least it’s not the Tim Burton version. You couldn’t pay me to watch that.* I even forgot it was released last year until it popped up in my Disney+ suggestions.

*A lie. You could. I’m an out-of-work writer. what do you want?

Best song: “Elephants on Parade”

#disney

[lkenticon]

loving to destroy myself - part two.

thank you for returning to read part two. here is a link to part one and the poem i wrote to will – if you haven’t read either, i would highly suggest you do to help make this story make more sense. i hope you find solace in my experience, and i can make you feel a little less alone.

names you need to know and can refer back to:

will – one of my best friends and the boy i have feelings for. named him ‘will’ because our story begins where i feel like he is my will to live, and it ends with a knowingness that i must be my own will.

ali – one of my best friends whom will has feelings for. named her ‘ali’ because it is short for alium, which is latin for ‘ the other’ because latin is one of our favourite languages.

greyson – another one of my closest friends. his best friends are myself, will and ali. him and i have always been just that – friends, even though i have had the stray thought every so often. he is a year ahead of all of us even though he is only two months older than me. named him ‘greyson’ because i have a nickname for him that starts with a ‘g.’

melissa – a girl will had feelings for. named her ‘melissa’ because i think she would look really pretty as a melissa. i love her real name too though.

alexis – a second girl will had feelings for. ‘alexis’ is the name of my car. alexis has blue in her hair, which is the same colour as my car alexis

<hr>

the first threat was a girl named melissa. will had feelings for her while she went to our school. they had a falling out and stopped talking, but they recently had reconnected. she was gorgeous – smart, witty, and a really unique person. melissa was homeschooled, so i saw her at school, but all of my friends knew who she was. i begun to realize that, maybe, when melissa had chose to homeschool, my friends only used me as a replacement. months before he began talking to melissa again, i would see will scrolling through endless memories of him, melissa, and my other friends. will, always smiling and mentioning how much fun they used to have. i felt hopeless and alone. why couldn’t i have that much fun with them? do they even want to be my friend if i can’t make those same memories? if i’m so different then melissa? if i’m so different than all of them? any sense of importance to will crumbled through my fingers. i just felt like a means to an end. perhaps, this was where my feelings of inadequacy begun, which marked the destructive path i was about to take.

as will and melissa began to hang out more, and him and i less, i felt so cripplingly alone again that i had to do something to get my spark back. i decided to befriend melissa. at the time, i didn’t really know what i was doing, only convincing myself that i was trying to ‘connect with more people’ and ‘reach out beyond my friend circle,’ but i now realize i befriended her to get insider information on how she felt about will. we started getting really close, and i shared how i felt with her, and she did as well. the best feeling was hearing “i don’t like will,” and i was finally at peace again, knowing that melissa did not reciprocate. london: 1, will: 0.

albeit my motives were ulterior, i’m actually still good friends with melissa, and she is one of my favourite people. however, she does not talk to will anymore and does not want him in her life.

after will and melissa stopped talking, suddenly, there was another girl named alexis. alexis had feelings for will in the past but will did not reciprocate. however, two years later, it was the exact opposite situation. alexis led will on (although i believe she did not know what she was doing), and again, i would just sit in my bed, seething with rage and trying to think of a way i could stop this from happening. i was now starting to become more aware of what i did with melissa and beat myself up daily for it, but i was hurting so bad that i couldn’t stop myself. i tried to befriend alexis (i was less forward about it this time), but eventually, we came to talking about will, and she said that she didn’t feel the same way. i felt awful about what i was doing – i would ask her how she was feeling, gain her trust, and then just wait until the topic came up. and come up it did, so i got my way once again. london: 2, will: 0

here’s the thing, though – as i became more aware of what i was doing, i resented myself and actually really grew to care for these people. as i said, i am still really close with melissa. although i’m not friends with alexis anymore, i still care for her a lot, and if she asked for literally anything, i would hands down do it. i even called her once when i was drunk just to talk because she is a really fun person. a mutual friend and i were hanging out, and she was also friends with alexis, so we thought it would be fun to call her.

but then, that leads me to this mutual friend. her name is ali, and ali and i had gotten really close over the past few weeks. we were in the same last period class, so we had bonded all semester, but by the end, we were proper friends. ali is a really pretty girl. she’s nice, caring, smart, and is way more emotionally stable than i am. i think i recognized this right away, but seeing as i was friends with her before she was friends with will, i had the upper-hand. but still, my winner-take-all-and-will-wins-if-he-even-gets-one-point scoreboard hunkered down and prepared for a third match. game on, even though at this point, i felt awful about playing the game. but, i always told myself, the pain was worth it if it meant will was still mine.

of course, i confided in her about my feelings for will, and she was really supportive. at this point, i knew how will felt about me. we had the conversation of ‘i have feelings for you’ and ‘i don’t feel that way’ months ago, but i still had hope. i actually told ali that she should go for him to make him happy (because he was being led on by alexis at this point), even though it shattered my heart to say that. our other friend, greyson, who was dating one of ali’s best friends, thought that will and ali should get together. i knew me saying the same thing would put that thought further into her mind.

she said she would try flirting with him but will was too into alexis, which in retrospect, was actually what i was hoping would happen. ali would go for will, will would say no, and that would ruin the chance of him and ali ever being together, successfully knocking her out as a threat. again, i did all of this knowing at some level, but convincing myself otherwise. i was only ‘trying to make both of them happy’ and ‘being strong by keeping my own emotions in check.’ only in retrospect do i realize the clarity of my main goal, and the extent of my mind games. like jesus, i really didn’t know i was this manipulative. i must sound like a horrible person. and, of course, my emotions reflected those of someone who feels like they are a horrible person.

eventually, i was so paranoid of feeling alone again, that i took a more offensive approach. there was a school dance which i told ali to ask will to, and also told will to ask ali to, neither being aware of what i had said to the other. she didn’t because will asked alexis instead, which was what i knew would happen. she said no, but they still hung out, and he was looking at her all night even though i looked fantastic, so i got mad and left. i went home that night and got so drunk that will had to call me and make sure i was going to stay on my couch for the rest of the night. ali also called me. she wanted to make sure i was okay, so i stayed on call with her for an hour or so. she told me to never do this to her again. i really do love ali. she’s kind of my favourite person.

in the following weeks, greyson broke up with his girlfriend, who immediately went back to her ex, which broke his heart. ali and greyson got even closer and will began to spend less time with alexis. this was all going how i wanted, except for some reason, all i felt was alone. at some level, i knew what i had done, and i hated myself for it. no matter what else i did, i would never be enough for any of them. even though i loved will, and i had him as a friend, it never felt like enough. i wanted to be the one that he went to for everything. the one that could fix anything he was going through, the one he could just sit with when he wanted to be alone because sitting with me just felt so okay. at least, that’s how i felt about him, and what i felt like he had done for me. london: 4, will: 0, even though it felt like i had lost again.

ali and greyson began to have a physical relationship, even though they were adamant that there were no feelings involved. greyson had just gotten out of a relationship, and he was pretty hurt, and so had ali. they were constantly flirting with each other and affectionate, which was perfect for me. i thought, eventually, they would both develop feelings and then start dating, because they clearly cared about each other and had the attraction, so why not? my scoreboard settled down into its new number, but i still felt horrible about myself.

but then, one night when ali, greyson and will were all over, everything changed. i was studying for an exam, and they were all over and drinking, though i wasn’t. greyson had to go home, so only will and ali could stay overnight. i wasn’t too keen on this idea because i knew greyson and ali weren’t exclusive, but i figured that if greyson was there, then ali would go for him and not will. but, oh well, i couldn’t do anything about it, so i drove greyson home, and ali, will and i hung out for the rest of the night.

now, i have a habit of being fairly destructive and emotional when i’m drunk, so will told me that he didn’t want me to “babysit both me and ali,” but then proceeded to watch ali to get drunk. long story short, they kept flirting all night and just ended up cuddling on the couch next to me while we were watching tv. i was sitting there, and i kid you not, my body was literally on fire. just burning. that’s all i felt. red, hot, burning rage. it was like i could explode at any moment and burst into a ball of upset energy. honestly, at that moment, i kind of wanted to explode and just be done with everything.

so, after about half an hour or so, will asked if i was okay because i looked upset, so i just said that i was and went upstairs and sat on my couch for a bit. then, i came downstairs again, grabbed my blanket, said i was fine, and stomped up to my room to sleep. they were watching a horror movie, and i could hear it from my room, so i texted will and told him to turn it down, but he didn’t read it until the morning.

i’m a very vocal person, and when i’m this upset, i have to tell someone. so i texted one of my friends and ranted about what was going on. they reciprocated the same frustrations with will, as most friends do when you call them slightly drunk and upset. i was feeling better, but still livid, so i eventually fell asleep while listening to Mozart.

in the morning, i went downstairs, and will and ali weren’t cuddling anymore. but, they were still flirting and sitting really close to each other while i was sitting behind them trying to study. eventually, i felt so sick and got so angry that i went upstairs and asked my mom if she could tell them to go while i was doing my homework, and she did. needless to say, i didn’t end up doing my homework that day and just sat on my floor crying. on top of that, i didn’t get my medicine until 5:00 that day and hadn’t gotten it the day before, so it was a mess times ten.

ali texted me later that day and told me that she was really sorry for what she did when she was drunk, and told me it wouldn’t happen again. i was angry for a few days, but i eventually said it was okay. will texted me as well, and i told him that i wanted to talk to him, which i do quite a lot. we were in the middle of finals, so i didn’t get a chance to see him for about five days. honestly, it felt so much longer than five days. maybe five years, because all of a sudden, the game was no longer under my control.

what made it worse was that in those five days, ali and will were hanging out quite a bit. i know because i’m really bad when it comes to snap maps. one night, ali was over when will was studying, which made me absolutely boil over with anger and text will to chew him out about how i needed to talk to him. studying was something i did with will, not ali.

eventually, will and i got to talking, and we discussed why i was upset. he also talked about why he was upset that i told someone (who, of course, told someone else, and someone else, and eventually it made it’s way back to him). he told me that they weren’t a thing because he had only hung out with her a few times, and he wasn’t really in the headspace. i was feeling better about it and decided i was okay. i tried to put it in my mind that nothing was going on between them. london: 4? will: 0?

<hr>

wow, part two. thank you for reading and sticking with me. part 3 will be up 03.05.20 at 8:00pm central.

it’s difficult to admit how much i truly have tried to control, but it’s very therapeutic. it’s hard to admit that i’m not a perfect person, but i suppose nobody is. like everyone, i just want to feel loved. while that excuses nothing, maybe i can use it as a driving factor to my future.

let me know if you’ve ever looked back and realized how dangerous your actions were. it’s certainly hard to hear. i hope that i could make your day a little bit better.

love forever and always,

london

(link to my other posts)

(featured image credits)

#thoughts #rant #journal #blog post #personal thoughts #personal #high school #love #unrequited love #creative writing #short story #literature

[past3lp3gasus]

I’ve been delaying this post because I haven’t been ready.  I feel like I have so much to say and don’t even know where to start.  Plus, some of it is painful to reflect upon.  

It’s almost scary how my hair reflects my life and what I’m going through at the moment.  I’m learning a lot about how to navigate through life by something that most say is “just hair”.  Many women these days shave their heads because they are not their hair.  My truth is a bit different.  I feel like my hair is such an anchor in my life.  Like Sampson’s was in the bible.  

I began my journey with the embarrassing scraps.  I went blonde shortly before I started, and my hair started snapping off.  I looked like a little boy when my interlocks were put in.  I was chubby as well and having so little hair, made me look even more plump.  However, I was excited for the challenge.  Excited to tackle the challenge of self love.  I wasn’t the most fond to look upon at the moment, therefore, I refused to be hung up on my physical appearance.  It was then, where I began to look inside myself for inner beauty.  I began a lot of soul searching and was able to learn a good deal about myself and my passions in life.  One of the things I’ve learned through this journey is how compassionate I am.  

I kept my locks neat a lot through my last couple years of college.  I was working full time at the restaurant job that I hated, but paid my school fees.  I managed to hang in there for the better half of 2 years.  Years of nothing but pain and struggle. I finally graduated in December and being able to quit my job in February was so rewarding and liberating.  I was unemployed for a good 3 weeks.  Luckily I had saved up enough money to keep me a float during the job search process.  I applied for several jobs a day, which is funny because the job I ended up getting wasn’t even one that I applied for.  I just kind of happened through word of mouth.  However, had I not put myself out there, I wouldn’t have gotten this opportunity.  I applied to be a preschool teacher, shortly before I quit the Z.  My dad encouraged me to shadow a close family friend for a day because she had been doing this as a career most of her life.  I rushed  into her classroom from a job interview one morning.  I was so late so we didn’t have as much time, but she was able to give me plenty of pointers in that short amount of time.  

The next day was my trial shift at the preschool.  I believe it went well, but I didn’t end up getting the job.  However, I received a text message the following day from my family friend saying that her school was in need of an after school music instructor.  She said the director was one of her great friends who works at the same school as her.  She gave me his number and I called him right away.  We had a meeting in his classroom to discuss the culture of the program and our philosophies on music.  He hired me.  I am so incredibly blessed to have a boss who is so genuine.  He never tries to break my spirit.  I have felt nothing but support and encouragement from Josh and it means the world to me. From such a terrible experience at Zingerman’s I almost don’t know what it feels like for a person in leadership to treat me with dignity.  

The money from teaching was enough to keep me a float in a sense that I was $15 an hour as an assistant but only teaching 2 days a week. I continued to look for 2nd job and landed one subbing at Ann Arbor Learning community.  This is not a coincidence.  This is fate, because I used to run Lego club at that very school and my old manager put in a good word for me, along with Jhordan (my manager from the music school who stepped up and was also a reference that was the determining factor of my hiring).  So now I am working at AACL whenever they need me.  I love it because my schedule is not set in stone and I don’t “have” to come in if I don’t want to.

Eventually I got some private students through Josh.  That is more money in my pocket.  And he has also asked me to be a lead teacher next semester.  Of course, I will, because it pays more.  

Brad and I split recently for good.  The crazy thing is my hair is all tangled up. Let’s be honest, it looks rough and like it has been through a war.  HOWEVER, I have SOOOOOOO much new growth.  My roots need to be touched up. Anthony will definitely be able to do it for me when I get back to Ghana, meanwhile, I’m booking an appointment at Textures to get my hair done with my next paycheck because I currently look like a cave woman.   I feel like this is a symbol of my life at this very moment.  A ton damage, but a good amount of growth.  It is time for nourishment, refinement and maintenance.  

I have started by cracking down on my diet.  The biggest change I’ve made is cutting alcohol down to only on weekends, or if I go out.  Now I only drink 1-2 days a week, versus the 5-7 days I used to while working at the restaurant.  I was so stressed out after shifts and I used alcohol to cope.  I’m proud of myself for catching that flaw and leaving the situation.  Another change I’ve made is being more organized and more cleanly.  I knew I needed to change when seeing the inside of lover’s homes and observing that they are way more clean, neat and tidy than I.  I feel like a woman should always be clean.  The 3rd big change I’ve made is exercise.  I am now exercising about 5 days a week and sometimes I do 2 a days.  I am in the process of healing myself and my body, so that it is prepared for what the future brings.  I’m tired of caring all of this weight around.  I have a vision of what my body will feel and look like in the future and I feel like it is so attainable, I can almost taste it.  But I have to keep reminding myself that it’s a journey and a process.  I didn’t get to be this unhealthy over night, so I will not be healed over night either.  But the day I look in the mirror with a strong body, hair past my waist and a successful artist, I will feel like a champion.  I long for that feeling, which is exactly why I’m holding myself so accountable these days.  I am also proud that none of these goals involve men.  

I am really aiming to be able to navigate through life without the company of a lover.  I am striving to be my own lover, but sometimes I have weak moments.  Actually many times.  Like yesterday, when a guy left me his number.  I have it saved in my phone. He’s super adorable, but I never texted him.  I eventually will, but right now just isn’t the time.  I also met someone last weekend at a party.  We had a great time.  He really showed interest in me.  He lives in Chicago and was leaving the next night.  He hit me up in the morning wanting to meet and say goodbye.  We went to Hopcat for drinks.  I’m very relieved that he had to go back to Chicago though.  My heart is full at the moment and right now I just don’t have the space for anyone else.  We text back and forth and ask about each other’s days.  it’s nice.  But i’m of course not completely feeling it because I’m still hurting.  Plus, Brad gave me trust issues.  Ali (the guy from the party) mentioned moving to Ann Arbor and I told him to not base his decision off of me by any circumstance.  He’s a foreigner and so I’d imagine love is more simple for him.  He definitely has experienced love at first sight, which sucks because I don’t feel the same.  This is simply a fling, as terrible as that sounds.  But I have to look out for me these days.  I’m done putting my all into men who I’m not married to and I am very aware that many women even walk out of marriages over things that Brad put me through in the relationship.  

One last change I am making is seeking help.  Just like I’m going to get my locks done at the shop, I’m also looking to go back to therapy.  I always feel ashamed to go back, but I guess it’s sort of the trendy thing to do these days anyways haha.  So that makes me feel at least a little better.  I want to bounce back physically and become more flexible.  One day I’d like to start doing yoga. I also need to learn how to become flexible psychologically.  I can’t allow life to dig deep holes that I can’t get out of.  I want it to be more like a slinky instead, and not be so easily phased and affected by things that I can’t control and that are not worth my time/reaction.

I’m aware that this post is kind of a lot, but I really needed to get my thoughts organized by putting them in writing.  I also hope that being so public with my life will inspire someone.  

You are never alone.

I cringe at the thought of cutting my locks.  I don’t think I ever will, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

#past3lp3gasus #life #thoughts #natural hair #locs #black hair #wonderlocks #dreadlock journey #journey #hair #rasta #black woman #black is beautiful #black girl magic

[heytaemin]

odds (except 61)

thank you!! :D 

1. Favorite colorteal! followed by purple and silver3. Eye colora light blueish/gray depending on the lighting 5. Age20 and turning the big 21 this year 7. Tattoos?i don’t have any, but i’d like to get quite a few9. Favorite scentthe woods, campfires, the smell after it rains 11. Favorite time of dayprobably mid-morning, like 10-11am, especially when it’s nice and sunny out. it just feels like there’s so much time left in the day for me to do things13. Siblingsi have a sister who’s a year older than me and like 5 inches shorter than me15. On a day like today you would...?try to get organized haha. i’ve been trying to prepare myself for packing and stuff really17. The last text message you sent/received‘i’ve never had one before and just got one for studying abroad but i am sure that i shall use it a lot haha’ to @daesungismyeverything in our thrilling conversation about portable power banks19. Pick one thing to your left, what does it mean to youi have a stuffed koala in a sweater that my best friend gave to me for valentine’s day in high school and i bring it to college with me to remind me of her21. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?earlier today when i telepathically confessed my love to taemin i think i told my best friend i loved her the other day probably23. Who is your best friend and how did you meetokay so i have like 6 best friends tbh i met my friend ali in 6th grade but we didn’t really become good friends until like 8th grade or soi met my friend shayla in 8th grade (we shared homeroom together) and we’ve been ride or die since theni met livi in ??? 6th grade?? probably tbh but we didn’t really talk until like 10th grade or senior year i met emily/liz/natalie in college and we became good friends towards the end of freshman year/beginning of sophomore yeari met krysta before freshmen orientation and she and i have also been ride or die since then. she is my fellow salty gemini i met chad my first semester but we didn’t start talking until the summer after freshmen year where we talked for like 8-10 hours a day every day and the rest is history and i love him lotsand i met allison through tumblr about a year or so ago 25. Do you get sick oftennot really! i got sick a lot freshman year but i’ve done better at not getting sick by constantly washing my hands after going anywhere, though i get really bad seasonal allergies so from like now until april i like can’t breathe27. When was the last time you saw your familylike 20 minutes ago for my parents and last weekend for my sister29. Do you believe in true lovehonestly i’m not really sure how a person defines true love, but i feel like there’s really no formula for love. the way i see it is the relationship you have with someone is unlike any relationship you have with anyone else, so people can have multiple types of love for multiple people. personally i have different loves for a lot of people. (i also feel like that doesn’t answer the question oops) 31. When was the last time you got hurttoday tbh but it wan’t intentional33. What was the last fight you had abouti think the last really big fight i had was with an ex-best friend about keeping things from each other35. Have you seen anyone diejust pets37. Would you skip the bad parts of your life to be successfuli feel like the success wouldn’t be as meaningful if i was able to get it without experiencing any hardships. everything that’s happened in my life, the good and the bad, has made me who i am and i think it’s helped shape my goals in how i want to be successful.39. Have you left behind/ were you left behind in a friendshiptbh i feel like i’m growing apart from a lot of my close friends at the moment41. Who would you want to meet again in your lifethere’s a couple of friends who i’ve grown apart from since high school and i think it would be nice to be able to reconnect, but i’m not sure our paths will 43. What is something you regret from your pasti feel like being in denial about my sexuality is something i regret45. What was your last dream abouti really don’t dream that much! and i honestly forget them even when they are vivid enough for me to remember so i have no idea47. Talk about your favorite family membermy aunt! she’s my dad’s younger sister and she’s super funny and sassy and i love spending time with her. i only get to see her like once every 5 years or so but she’s still my favorite and i look up to her a lot49. Have you ever tried to take away your problems instead of deal with themi feel like i’ve been criticized by some people about ending our friendships when they would prefer to work them out, but my general philosophy is that if a relationship is doing more harm than good, and has been for a while, then it’s best to end it. i know a lot of people don’t agree with it but i think life’s too short to really be stuck being unhappy51. Have you been in loveyeah, with the second girl i liked and things very much fell apart before they ever began haha. it was really hard for like a year after we stopped talking, but it’s been about 4 years now and i don’t have any hard feelings towards her53. Describe your first ____ (since there’s a blank i’m gonna fill it in with cat bc cats are the best)my first cat(s) were named nikita and ming and we had them from when i was born until about 8 or 9 for ming and like 11 or 12 for nikita. ming was a siamese cat and nikita was a tabby cat and he was super fat until we got my cat tibbs who’s still kickin’ it today because he’d always chase him around our house55. Have you ever had to recover after somethingnothing really in particular, no57. Top ten life valueskindness, honesty, compassion, empathy, wit, humor, peace, commitment, respect, believing in others and yourself59. When was the last time you smiled and the last time you criedmy friend and i were talking about his sort of boyfriend but not really and he said something about him and then changed the subject to ask how my cat was and i said ‘very smooth’ in response to his comment about his not really boyfriend but it was a big miscommunication and it sounded like i implied my cat was smooth which is a very strange adjective to refer to a cat as and it was funny; also i watched a sad video at like 2 this morning and it made me cry

THIS TOOK A WHILE OH MY GOODNESS

also the formatting is messed up but i cannot be bothered to fix it rip

thanks again for asking!! 

#answered #biaspile-lz #70 years later and it is complete