#have I ever talked about how much I love Rouge the bat | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

the-sinful-voice-witch · 2 years

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Time to be in love with Rouge the bat

The infamous mean Cruel bitch misinterpretation of her.😡😡

Well after I finally vented off about sexy characters being questioned their value in the other introduction first post is time we get to her personality and characterization cause just like Amy, Rouge had for a while a really mean interpretation of her, just like Amy was portrayed a lot as a whiny pushy sonic stalker Rouge has been portrayed as a... Mean bitch in the bad sense 🤦😑

It is true that in her debut she was like that at first: really selfish, unapologetically mean, thoughtless, irrational.... But those things changed right at the climax of the game and it proved that she learned to be mindful of the consequences of certain actions and that she can be influenced by the "good" and that she deep down was empathetic and caring.

So there was so many times I disliked a lot what they did with her personality in games and comics cause to me SHE ISN'T LIKE THAT!🤬🤬

Like for example, as greedy as she is i can't believe they would make her work with scourge and do things like seducing and kissing KNUCKLES FATHER 🤢 just what the fuck? I'm not putting that image cause... Just NO hell! Bit it's real guys for those who didn't know the only kiss scene that this bat girl ever had was with the fucking knuckles the echidna FATHER, was this some kind of mockery for Knuxrouge fans? Cause in this universe certain Julie su aka "knuckles soulmate cousin"🙄🙄 exists... Really Archie you did her dirty in your dark era...

But not only this, speaking about Julie su... (Ajjj fucking Ken penders and your reign of evil and your damn echidnas armie!) Remember in the Archie comics where Julie su exists she was used to make her look like a total evil asshole compared to Julie su cause apparently Julie herself wasn't good enough so they needed to make bitchy other loved character so she could always be seen as the best option for knuckles 🙄😑 Julie actually almost called her that 🤬 but at least Rouge put her in her place even if that made her look like the bad one.

Seriously 😒. Rouge is a mischievous flirt, but I don't see natural that her character would go this far! She is too confident and independent to be competing with other girls for a guy!! It doesn't matter she likes the guy, i bet if she sees she doesn't have a chance she will just tough it out and keep doing her life.

But they didn't only put her antagonizing Julie, they also made her be like the antagonist girl of a teenager movie group of girlfriends 😑🤦 Stop please STOP, (thank goodness it actually stopped 😌) really this 👇👇 was really awful cause I believe Rouge and Amy is a potential underrated friendship and putting them like this with Rouge underestimating and deceiving them like that AJJJJJJ what the hell? Are you trying to make me hate rouge? You won't succeed because I know that's not her true person!

But the worst part of this ☝️☝️ you see? She is with the team Dark complete, remember when I said Rouge worst attitude changed at SA2 climax? Well in her SH appearance she was absolutely friendly and caring with her team, the team she formed, the one she is often the voice of reason and the mother hen cause the other guys tend to be stubborn and impulsive... How much she cared about Shadow in that game and worried about him even though her goal was shallow and greedy she still genuinely wanted to help him and showed sadness thinking he might be a robot, the same sadness at the end of SA2 when sonic gave her his bracelet and she asked if he thought he was really made to be a weapon and sadly looking through the space ship window until knuckles talks to her like trying to comfort her...😭😭

It's not like i disliked this shadow and this omega but if you have to make rouge the cruel selfish jerk one purposely to make them shine something is really wrong because also I don't think shadow would like to team up with someone with this attitude.

Plus its unnecessary you know? Degrading a character to make look good others is a cheap writer move.

But it didn't happened only in the old comics, it also happens in some games like the cursed Sonic riders 3... She along with Amy and Shadow were total dicks! 🤬🤬 I also disliked her in Sonic battle (except for her interaction with shadow) and Sonic chronicles though fortunately that is not cannon anymore...

You see, when they do this to her it feels like is a complete shallow interpretation of her and is so unfair because her character is better than that! And can be used better... And you know I'm right cause things got better with time, see you in the next part talking about Rouge real good characteristics

Remember, she is not a bitch!

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic #sonic idw #knuckles the echidna #amy rose #rouge the bat #shadow the hedgehog #comics idw #knouge #amy Rose #knuxouge #team dark #sonic the hedghog movie

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darkjanet2 · 9 months

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Sonic Adventure 2: Sonadow

Chapter 9: Finding the Last Emerald

*Space Colony Ark*

50 years ago.

Maria and Shadow were in the control room, staring outside the planet Earth's surface window. Maria stood at the front of the ship window, her long, blonde hair flowing over her shoulders. She wore her signature blue, knee-length dress that matched her eyes perfectly. Her white heels shone like polished ivory. Her pink lips curled into a smile as she gazed upon the beautiful world below them.

Shadow stood next to her with a serious look on his face. His red eyes stared through Maria's reflection with an icy coldness. He was no longer as excited about this mission. It was a routine rescue mission.

"So, Shadow, what do you think of life on Earth?" asked Maria. "Is it nice there?"

Shadow glanced away from her as if he didn't want to talk about the planet. "Not really."

"Really? Why?" Maria asked, turning to face him with a curious expression. Her blue eyes sparkled with curiosity.

"The professor said his life's work was dedicated to all of those who live here," explained Shadow, crossing his arms in a huff. "So I don't understand why they need to keep going back for more knowledge. They should be happy living in one place and working in one area."

"But what about their families? Don't they feel sad?" questioned Maria, her voice filled with concern. Shadow looked at her. He'd never noticed how beautiful she was until now. She was so kind, compassionate, and innocent. She was always trying to help others. Even when people didn't deserve it. She reminded Shadow so much of…himself.

"That's true…" said Shadow thoughtfully. He had never considered that before. "Maria... I just don't know anything anymore. I wanted to know why I was created, but…" Maria placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. She smiled at him gently. Shadow knew she understood his frustration and felt sympathy towards him.

"Hey, it'll get better," Maria reassured him. "Professor Robotnik is very good at helping people. He told me so himself. Just wait and see."

Shadow nodded. Then he turned his head and looked at his reflection once again. "What about you? You never did tell me what your life is like here."

"My life…?" Maria trailed off, confused by his question. "It's not that interesting. My family has moved here to be near Professor Robotnik. But I'M the one who will have to go back and forth between them."

Suddenly, she realized something. She quickly turned around to face Shadow. "Hey, Shadow, what do you think about my parents? Do you think they're happy?" Maria wasn't sure what else to ask him. She hoped he would give her some answers. After all, if anyone understood human emotions better than herself, it was Shadow. He was so different from other beings. He could relate to humans more easily than any of them. She wanted to know what he thought of her mother and father. "Do you think they miss me?"

"They missed you very much," answered Shadow without hesitating. "Your mother even cried when she saw you leaving the lab the day we came back from our trip." Maria blushed slightly at his words. "But you weren't gone long. Your father made sure that you returned safely."

"Well then, thank you," Maria replied."

"Maria..." Shadow spoke softly, almost like a whisper.

*End Flashback*

Shadow opened his eyes slowly, his mind filled with memories of Maria. He still remembered how she had comforted him when he was feeling down. He had been so angry, hurt, and lonely. Maria was the first friend he ever had since he ever had. And although he hated to admit it, he liked Maria a lot. More than he liked any other human being. He loved her kindness, caring nature, and sweet nature. And more importantly, he loved the way that she made him feel like he belonged somewhere.

"Shadow?" A female voice called out to him from behind.

He turned around to face the female bat, Rouge, with a neutral look on her face. She gave him a small wave as she approached him. She stood there inches away from Shadow, looking directly at him. "Why so melancholy? That was so unlike you, Shadow. You came to me and recused me," Rouge said. "The Choas Control definitely comes in handy."

Shadow scoffed, "I didn't come to save you, I came for the Chaos Emeralds."

Rouge rolled her eyes, "Yeah, I figured that, considering you're the only one that hasn't found it yet."

The sound of the door opening from behind them, it was Eggman entering the control room. He walked over to the console and began fiddling with various buttons. "We've got a few minutes to prepare for the dropoff. Everyone ready?"

"Ready? We have six of the seven Chaos Emeralds, including the Chaos Emerald that we lost," stated Rouge flatly.

Shadow smirked in determination. "That's more than enough for a demonstration. So let's get the show on the road." He turned away from Rouge and walked over toward the exit.

*At the Meadow*

The next morning, Tails was cooking breakfast over the campfire while Amy was making tea. Sonic groggily opened his eyes, his nose caught the smell of bacon and eggs wafting up to him.

"Rise and shine, Sonic," Tails called. "Get ready for breakfast!"

The hedgehog rubbed his eyes and sat up straight. He yawned as he stretched his arms above his head. "Finally, food," he grumbled. 'Gotta pee.' Sonic thought.

He walked over to the bushes and peed there sighing in relief. Once he finished, he washed his hands in the lake and he returned back to the campsite where everyone else was already sitting down and eating their breakfast.

"Morning, everybody." Sonic took a seat beside Tails who handed him a plate full of bacon and eggs. The hedgehog wolfed it down, inhaling the delicious aroma with relish. After his meal, he picked up the teapot and poured himself some tea, enjoying the warmth of the cup in his hands. The aroma seemed to calm his nerves. "So, guys," he started. "Any plans for today?"

Everyone paused for a second before speaking. "We're gonna go to Central City to take care of the Chaos Emeralds," said Tails simply. He continued eating his breakfast as if nothing happened.

"Central City! Oh man, that sounds fun!" exclaimed Amy. She slurped up her pancakes with gusto, her mouth stuffed full of food. "I wish I could go, too."

Sonic shrugged. "Sure, whatever. Whatever you say."Amy pouted at him. Sonic knew she disliked being ignored.

"Well, let's get moving," suggested Tails, standing up. Sonic rose to his feet and collected his empty plates and utensils before setting them aside. "Wherever we go, we must leave within 30 minutes. We have to make the drop-off time as quick as possible. If we linger in one spot for too long, we risk having the Chaos Emeralds discovered."

Sonic nodded, knowing full well how difficult his journey would be. He'd rather fight Robotnik and his henchmen than spend more time on Earth.

"Let's get going before Eggman does anything stupid," said Sonic.

After they cleaned up the campsite, they mounted Tails' Tornado biplane which flew swiftly across the forest. The sky was clear and bright, and there were white, puffy clouds in sight. They soared across the trees, heading westwards towards Central City. In the distance were buildings of steel skyscrapers and large warehouses. The group headed to the nearest city. It was called Central City and was home to many factories, manufacturing plants.

"Next stop, Central City," said Tails.

#enemies to lovers #sonadow #sonic the hedgehog #sonic adventure 2 #shadow the hedgehog #fanfiction #first kiss #first sex #yaoi

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ofherlionheart · 2 years

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hhhhhhshdh these OPTIONS ur. so good to ur readers. 2 &/or 4?!?!?! 👀👀👀

going w/ no. 2 b/c there's nothing substantial for no. 4 😅 way back when i was thinking abt doing a mailee companion piece for like the sun! obvi like the sun is not finished so this companion is on the back back back burner but. i go back and reread what little i have of it sometimes lol

have a lil excerpt :) of ty lee walking mai home from the palace on the night of zuko's coronation. ya know. just #galpal things

—————

“So,” Ty Lee says, in her nothing-but-business-and-the-business-is-gossip tone. “Your boyfriend is the Fire Lord now, huh?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s pretty wow, isn’t it?”

“I guess.”

“You guess? Mai, he’s just become the most attractive unmarried man in the entire nation, and you’re the one dating him.”

An entire nation of eyes on Zuko—eyes that will also be on her, by nature of her being at his side. “He’s still just Zuko,” she says.

Ty Lee huffs. “Sometimes, I just don’t know how the romance stays alive between you two.”

Mai could say something here, about how when they’re alone, she knows where to touch him and how to kiss him to make his body go pliant and to make his hands more daring as they rove over her body, but she doesn’t talk about these things with Ty Lee. She doesn’t talk about them with anyone, really, and it’s probably for the better. Her etiquette aunts have had plenty to say about girls who let boys touch them too much before marriage, and her father and mother have only ever agreed with them.

“He writes me poetry and I sing him songs,” Mai drawls.

Ty Lee laughs—her real laugh, the one with little snorts that she usually holds back when anyone else is around. “You’d sing the saddest songs,” she says, “and he’s write about flutter bats and turtle ducks.”

“I should go into the opera.”

“I’d love to see you in a bright pink costume. Oooh, and wearing lipstick! And rouge!”

“Over my dead body.”

They reach Mai’s home and slip along the side of the house to the back garden. There, among the dying peonies and budding camellias, Ty Lee pulls Mai into a tight hug, their cheeks pressing together. Her waist feels impossibly little in Mai’s arms, and it’s no wonder Ty Lee can look like she’s walking on air when she wants to.

“When do you leave?” Mai asks.

“Tomorrow morning.”

Mai knows that just because the war is over and Zuko is Fire Lord, that doesn’t mean the Kyoshi Warriors would have nothing real to do and Ty Lee could just stay here, with her, and they could walk home from the palace together every night. Knowing this doesn’t keep her chest from pinching, though.

She squeezes Ty Lee one more time before letting go. Ty Lee’s smiling, reassurance warming her gray eyes. “I’m going to write so many letters to you,” she says.

“Will you?”

Ty Lee takes Mai’s hand in both of hers. “Yes! So many. You won’t even know what to do with all of them.”

Her thumbs brush the back of Mai’s hand, and Mai suddenly remembers the last time she did this. In a prison her uncle had deemed nice enough for his treasonous niece, Mai was lying on the prison cell floor, her head in her friend’s lap, a self-indulgent sadness trickling past her lips: When you left for the circus, I thought I’d lost you forever.

And Ty Lee, stroking her hand, answering: I’ll never let you feel like that again.

—————

creativity tag on! choose a wip and i’ll share a concept or excerpt

#tag game #sry babes there rly isnt much new boo content atm :( ik u love it #in the same way that every version of z i write has azn glow and brown nips #every version of ty lee i write has been deeply whipped for mai since childhood #(but takes foreeeeever to admit it to mai)#(mai knows for many years before ty lee says anything)#(ty lee knows she's kinda being obvious)#(they don't communicate abt it lolololol)#atla #like the sun inside of you

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thekingofthieves · 2 years

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{ Ask Masterpost }

🌹 Do you like looking at artwork?

🦊 Did you convince spirit world to convert Hiei's sentence? I've always wondered why they kept him alive.

🌹 How much do you like cats? After all, they do say foxes are cat software running on dog hardware :3

🦊 When did you realize you wanted more than friendship with Hiei?

🌹 What is your opinion on your step brother do you share similar interests?

🦊 I'm curious how a whip became your main weapon of choice. What made you go for that as opposed to something more "traditional" like a blade?

🌹 Since you are a fox can you still understand foxes even in your human form? If you can understand them what kinds of things are foxes communicating about. Also can you talk to foxes with regular human speech or do you need to use "fox language" (idk what language foxes speak lol)

🦊 Since you can change into a fox can you loaf 🤯

🌹 How was you kindergarten experience when you was just started getting used to your human form🤔

🦊 Have you watched the snapcube sonic fan dubs ☆ In your fox form do you ever get the zoomies ☆ What was the funniest thing you ever experienced (so funny that you actually started belly laughing)

🌹 What is your favorite show/movie/anime(or cartoon)? What is your favorite book series?

🦊 Do you know any fire demons (other than hiei)? ☆ Have you and/or hiei researched them? Do they have their own language/lexicon like the koorime do? Are they as extremely isolated as the koorime? ☆ Do you think the Jaou Ensatsu Kokuryuuha is a specific attack for the fire demons? Or can anybody use it? ☆ Also do demons worship goods/deities like humans do or are there specific rituals for their worship? Like how humans have shrines for inari.

🌹 Do different types of demons have different types of reproductive anatomy and/or reproductive abilities?? Like how the koorime are able to reproduce asexually.

🦊 I know this may sound odd but I kinda wanna draw you as Rouge the bat you would look good with a lovecore aesthetic.

🌹 Building on your response to the ask abt demon gods: are any of the gods of human religions (Yahweh, Shiva, Ahura Mazda, etc.) actually just powerful demons who humans became somehow aware of and mistook for gods? Or even were actual ascended gods? I'd be interested to know how many of those were "real" in some capacity vs. just being human inventions.

🦊 Is there anything in particular you like to get up to when you're in your fox form? Also, does being in fox form change how you think or process thoughts, or do you pretty much have the same "brain" and thought process you do when in human/demon form?

🌹 You should rotate your tails really fast and join the cast of sonic the hedgehog

🦊 I know you're all about plants, but do you have a favorite animal here in the human realm?

{ Prompt Asks }

7A. Would you cannibalise a dead body in a life-or-death scenario? Does your answer change depending on whether they're a loved one or not? (I guess eating humans wouldn’t really count as cannibalism.) Instead for my other question: Can certain demons survive without the consumption of humans? I know raizen died because he didn’t consume humans after a long period of time.

22A. Do you want children with your partner? Why or why not?

92A. Do you speak multiple languages? Which do you dream in? What language would you want to learn? Also does the makai have its own language or is it an amalgamation of many different human world languages?

96A. Is your perception of yourself similar or the same to how others perceive you?

98A. Do you ever feel that you are really a terrible person, and only act good out of societal or some other obligation?

1B. What do you crave in a psychological sense? Intimacy, passion, purpose, belonging, social interaction, etc.?

4B. Who's the most important person in your life right now? Why? (If you had to choose one person)

5B. Do you see your parents in your appearance or behaviour? Are they favourable traits?

10B. What are your feelings on cheating in relationships? Have you ever done it, has anyone ever cheated on you?

12B. What's your most controversial opinion? Would you state it publicly? What's the most controversial opinion that you would publicly support, if it's different?

30B. If you don't have tattoos, and had to get one, what would you get tattooed on you? Is getting tattooed a big deal to you? If you are tattooed, do you regret any?

#figured this could help people traverse the blog so you wont have to scroll across all the response text to reach older posts!#the text formatting is solely to make it easier to read/differentiate between questions. at least it helps for me!

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the-reaplet · 1 year

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So also like Salsa if you're interested who is Scourge? That green hedgehog guy everyone wants Zonic the zone cop to smooch (also is zonic a guy? Like a human?)

Thank you for your patience, Anon. First of all, Zonic isn't a human, but he is indeed a guy. He's a hedgehog, just like normal Sonic. Now as for your main question.

OH BOY HERE WE GO AGAIN!

First thing's first, I am not gonna go over the IRL drama that involves his original creator, Ken Penders. And I'm not really gonna talk about Ian Flynn either. That kind of drama is really something I couldn't care less about. I have 0 opinion on Ian Flynn's writing style for characters, and I just dislike Ken Penders in general.

Now! The big question! Who is Scourge? To answer that, we need to talk about Evil Sonic.

Scourge was a true blue "evil" version of the normal Sonic we all know and love. I say evil in quotes because back in the day when he wasn't green, he was a really lame villain. That is, if he was trying to be evil, he didn't really put his all into it. There is something to be said that maybe Evil Sonic never really wanted to be evil, and I subscribe to the theory that he was a bad guy due to peer pressure. Now, "Evil Sonic" (or Anti-Sonic) is from the Reverse World, where Bad Guys were Good Guy and Good Guys were Bad Guys. He led a group called the Suppression Squad (the Anti-Freedom Fighters), and he sought out to be king of his world. He was eventually arrested by Sonic Prime and Zonic the Zone Cop.

Fast Forward! Anti-Sonic had since escaped from jail. One day he teams up with Rouge the Bat and they go after the Master Emerald, which was guarded by Knuckles's father Locke. (Don't ask me about him, all I know is that no one really likes Locke because he's a bad dad.) Now, that day was Sonic's Birthday. Which means it was also Anti-Sonic's Birthday. So, to celebrate, he decided that he deserved a treat. He betrayed Rouge (who was already planning on betraying him so it's whatevs) and gave himself a power boost with the Master Emerald. The results being that he turned into the Mean Green Machine we know him as today.

Now, this is purely conjecture, and I have little to no proof of it, but I think that the Chaos Energy he absorbed affected him mentally. I think it drove him off the deep end. After being attacked by Locke, thus gaining his chest scars, he decided he was no longer just a copy of Sonic the Hedgehog. He gave himself a new name. Scourge. From then on, he was vicious. He was much more aggressive and a threat than ever before. And could've been downright lethal if the writers had the guts to show him killing people on-screen.

(One thing to note is that at some point, Scourge sneaks into Sonic's parents' home at night to get the jump on our hero, and he was confronted by his father. From there, we are given a piece of Scourge's past. His own father was a big time politician who was neglectful at best to his son. Scourge says that his father "just isn't", which implies a multitude of things. Some think he's dead, others think this was a comment on how he just wasn't a dad for Scourge. It's left vague, but this story seems to show that Scourge associates Peace with his father's neglect, making him bitter toward the idea of it.)

He was once again arrested later on, and the next time we see him, he's been the punching bag of the No Zone Prison. He was fitted with an inhibitor collar that took away his powers, his quills were shaven, and the Warden, Zobotnik, was putting him through "aggressive rehabilitation". He was having a horrible time. But, his girlfriend, Fiona Fox (who honestly deserved better than how the prime Freedom Fighters treated her), got a group together and busted him out. The last time we see him, he's returned to his home world, and Zonic notes that he could only hope he stays there.

hAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. Hope that answers the question of who Scourge is. He's a really fascinating character, and I recommend you do your own research on him.

#ask the bean #salsa speaks #scourge the hedgehog #the skrunkly #anon really knows how to activate me kekw #lemme know if you have other questions #always happy to answer #bit of a #long post

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redbone135 · 2 years

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Hey!! I'm curious; why do you like vampires?

I promise I'm not being negative or judgey, I really am just curious and I don't think I've ever really asked you why they're one of your favorite creatures, and I'd genuinely like to know why :)

Also, does that mean you have an appreciation for vampire bats too?

So, not being negative or judgey, but what answer are you looking for? Like... what kind of answer have you come up with that makes it worth asking to confirm?

Honestly, that’s a really hard question to answer cause I haven’t put much thought into it. I like what I like and sometimes it’s better to not ask myself why?

It would be really easy to write it off as a tangential thing. That a lot of the shows I like about vampires have incredibly talented writers or casts that tie into my other interests. Buffy shares some writers with Once Upon a Time and Torchwood, True Blood has Michael Raymond James and Lizzy Caplan in it, Interview with a Vampire not only has a very talented author but stars Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise among many other big cast members. Vampires are popular in the kind of drama, soap-opera meets action adventure style shows I like to watch. So it kind of happens by accident in that regard.

But that’s not the complete answer because before I was watching vampires, I was actively seeking them out in books. Pirates too. As a pre-teen I had to live with my grandmother for a little while due to some home-life stuff and out of sheer boredom - because she only took me to the library once a week and didn’t have cable - I might have started borrowing... yeah... that’s the word we’ll use... some books and movies that were not all that age-appropriate from the other old-folks in her community. You know the books I’m talking about... my grandma called them ‘fire books’. And as a librarian, I’m sure you’re aware that those kinds of books often feature vampires, pirates, and other morally grey heroes. That time spent there is also where my love of musical theater started, but I digress. It was a really formative age, and the loveable rouges in those books always got the girl and always saved the day, despite being ‘bad’ guys... and I guess part of that stuck.

I’ve mentioned to you before in passing that we come from different cultures, mine tended to be a lot more morally grey a lot younger in life. I didn’t have the role models telling me how to think or act, and the things I was exposed to young weren’t the best examples of good behavior either. I like the morally-greyness of tropes like vampires and pirates because they also don’t have the same easy definition of good and evil. For whatever reason, life hasn’t been kind to them, and they’ve had to make tough calls either out of self-preservation or fear. Pre-teen me related to that. They then have to build their own moral code the hard way, which is what I was trying to do at the same time I was reading all these books. And because they built their own moral code - because their morals came from themselves and not others - it often meant that they were a lot stronger in their convictions and it was that ambiguity that allowed them to thrive and be the hero because they were thinking very critically about the world around them and their place in it. I guess pre-teen me related to that too.

I like good vampires because they have to ask themselves HOW to be good, it doesn’t just come naturally. I like bad vampires because they are an example of HOW easy it is to fall into traps when you let others define you. There is nothing better than a good vampire that overcomes, and nothing scarier than a bad vampire who is exactly what others say he is.

So yeah - is that a suitable answer? Or were you looking for something a little more deviant :P

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roguesdepravity · 2 years

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BTAS Batman x reader relationship headcanons? no pressure and thank you for taking this request

The big bat himself ooo. Sorry I have some thoughts on him GHFJD. Also there are so many contingencies here. At least I think Batsy would be proud. And thank you for requesting! I might be rogue-focused, but I like a few of the Bats too.

- Meeting him as Bruce would be the easiest way to get to date him. Though a trust fund kid might find it more difficult to foster a true relationship with him than an employee who he flirts with occasionally after meetings.

-Bruce is a charming man in a lot of ways. He might act dumb more often than not, but occasionally he will be forced to show just exactly how he manages to keep Wayne Tech afloat among his other business ventures. In those moments you get to see why he is considered reliable and just might make you consider giving him a chance.

-Meeting him as Batman first, would make it a bit more difficult unless you are actively fighting with/against him.

-If you caught his eye as a hostage he saved, he might find out who are, and see if it would even be reasonable to meet you properly.

-No matter exactly how you first meet, he would prefer you have an actual relationship with his unmasked persona above everything else. You would be safer without the connection to the vigilante, but also early on, he can't risk you knowing his identity even if he wants to tell you everything. Maybe an unwarranted fear, but Catwoman falling for Batman and leaving him for his masked persona left an impression on him.

-His dates as Bruce are extravagant in public. Whether its trips to famous resort destinations or expensive galas, he loves to show you off if you are willing to indulge in that. However, dates at the manor are more intimate and quiet. Most of the time he just enjoys chatting with you on the couch watching tv as Dick or Tim bug Alfred over how happy he looks.

-Bruce loves to just hold you in his arms and whisper how much he cares about you. Sometimes he has a hard time letting go because of how much he is afraid to lose you.

-You make him genuinely smile which Alfred would tell you hasn't happened in a long time.

-Gifts are expensive but meaningful. He only wants to give you things you would enjoy because he does know that his money can be intimidating.

-The best thing you can get for him is a picture of you for him to keep. He is always looking at the portrait of his parents, and if anything happens to you he wants that for you as well.

-He'd never tell you, but he has spent many nights with Alfred talking about whether or not he should stay with you. How can he bring someone else into his crazy life, but how could he deny himself of someone so wonderful either?

-If you happen to be a rouge, just know he is counting down the seconds till the relationship ends. He has been burned with Selina and Harvey by hoping that they really did want redemption and so he won't allow his feelings to muddy the waters if you ever do want to quit crime. In turn, he would never give up his life of crime-fighting, and he can't risk you using his secret identity against him. He cares deeply about you, but it just wasn't meant to be. He would just have to do his best to get over you.

-If you are also a vigilante, his life is a bit easier as he has no qualms about telling you who he is at the right time. Since you are working along side him, he is even more protective of you than if you didn't.

-For a civilian he will try to be there for you as Bruce. He isn't acting as much as people might believe he is as the playboy millionaire so when he tells you how much you mean to him he hopes you can believe him. Even if things don't work out between you, as long as you allow him, he will still try to reach out to you. Whether its getting a new job at a new company or supporting your love of the arts with a donation to the local theater, he won't forget what you loved and cared about beyond him. It wouldn't even matter if you broke Bruce's heart, he honestly cares so much that he would still put himself out there just to make sure that he at least tried to make things cordial between you.

-Telling you he is Batman would have to come after many complicated nights. If he did want to marry you, he'd have to tell you to feel good about it.

-If somehow you manage to start something with him as Batman, he is a lot more handsy and protective than he'd normally be. He doesn't know how long he will have with you, and he is trying his best to keep you around for as long as he can. That also means that he might only see you once a week if you are lucky. Not being able to be Bruce with you eats at him slightly, but its just how things have to be. Though he is normally rough with his rogues, when it comes to you he is extra violent. It gets to the point that only Joker would dare try to involve you in his schemes.

#batman x reader #bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne headcanon #btas headcanons #btas batman #bruce wayne #btas #batman headcanon

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thomasprime1701 · 2 years

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Ok, so I just came out of The Batman (2022), and I have some thoughts:

• Riddler’s intro was hella intimidating and kinda scary. Made me audibly go “Holy shit.”

•Battinson’s opening narration. Felt like it was ripped straight from a comic book.

• He puts on gothic makeup on screen. What a freak. (I mean that in the nicest way.)

• the fact that every criminal in Gotham is scared of the shadows just goes to show how much of a fucking impact that Bruce has had over the two years he’s been Bats.

•First fight scene was great. “I’m vengeance” was just as impactful as it was in the first trailer.

•Police’s reactions to The Bat just go to show how much of a rouge element he still is.

• so glad we’re past the whole “My parents were shot down in Crime Alley so let’s see it in Slow Motion” Phase of Batman.

• Amazing to have a larger focus on the “world’s greatest detective” side of Batman. Having read the comics, it’s nice for a movie to acknowledge that he’s more than a force of nature that like to punch criminals.

• Iceberg Lounge!

• The Riddler’s look needs some improvement. I mean, I get that can’t have him look like the classic comic book, but he just looks kinda ridiculous and doesn’t scream “Riddler.”

• Penguin is a riot when he’s on screen. It’s like he’s ripped from a cartoon. He’s so much fun and- HE’S PLAYED BY WHO?! THAT MAKEUP IS AMAZING.

•Selina Kyle is fucking amazing. Best portrayal of the character in live action thus far.

• Selina and Bruce’s relationship is definitely a highlight.

• Bruce does a “disappear while people’s back are turned and talking to me” thing twice in the film and it’s so “Batman”

• All the fight scenes are brilliantly choreographed.

• THE BATMOBILE. THE FUCKING BATMOBILE! I HAVE NEVER BEEN AS EXCITED OR AS INTIMIDATED BY A CAR IN LIFE.

• Definitely got some Carrie vibes from that Batmobile introduction.

• Riddler’s little hissy fit when things don’t go his way is so in character and I love it.

Obviously not everything I noticed or liked about the movie. Maybe I’ll make a part two to what I liked about it. Long story short, this movie understands what Batman is about, and takes its time and analyzing the character and what makes this world of Gotham so accurate to the comics. Gotham is a cesspool. It is crime ridden and honestly, is not a great place to live. Anyone who says that this movie is depressing sad and dark, honestly has not seen a Batman comic book nor do they get what Batman is about as a comic series. This is honestly the best Batman movie I’ve ever seen. Bravo, Pattinson. Can’t wait to see you again in the obvious sequel.

#battinson #the batman #the batman 2022 #the riddler #the batman spoilers #cat woman

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stxleslyds · 3 years

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Also, the writers' failure to understand, every crime Jason committed had a motive. Attack other criminals? Holy warrior destined to purify the world of evil. Attack Bruce? Joker's still alive. (Oh, Jason, it's much worse than that.) Attack Tim? A parody of what he once was. He wasn't just a "bad boy". He was dangerously insane.

Hi, Anon! Yup, there seems to be a lot of things that writers have gotten confused about Jason Todd/Red Hood and the biggest one is his motivations to kill certain criminals.

Let’s be honest, Judd Winick set a golden path for the upcoming Red Hood writers. But each and every writer that used Red Hood in their stories completely missed the point of Jason’s character. All of them. It’s so incredibly wild to me that every other writer read UtRH and came up with whichever version of Jason they came up with.

Let’s list the writers that completely missed the point.

Geoff Johns in Teen Titans vol.3 #29.

Geoff Johns was one of the first to completely mischaracterize Jason, why on earth would Jason go to the Titans Tower to beat up Tim? This is not me saying that Jason would never do that because Jason thinks of Tim as his brother or a friend or the person that he can trust the most from the Bat-Clan (can you believe Lobdell tried to sell us that one?), this is me saying that Jason wouldn’t have done that because he couldn’t have given less of a fuck about Tim’s existence.

When Jason found out that Bruce had another Robin he wasn’t bothered by his “replacement” he was mad at Bruce for having another child playing hero after he lost his life as a fifteen-year-old. Jason didn’t even think of Tim as his replacement as fandom likes to make us believe, Jason called Tim “pretender”. And that was that, but to go from minimal recognition to go out of his way to beat him up at Titans Tower is a massive mischaracterization.

Paul Dini in Countdown (to Final Crisis).

Paul Dini in Countdown did absolutely nothing with Jason, I am sorry but that’s all he did. Him writing Jason was like watching a dog trying to catch their own tail. He started with a pretty basic take on UtRH Jason, then he added a bit of Jason being an annoying man with Donna, then we had the jealousy arc because apparently, Jason had the hots for Donna but she didn’t want anything to do with him and he was all angsty when she paid attention to Kyle instead of him, and then, later on, he had that whole Red Robin bullshit (I am sorry about this, but I absolutely hated that, it was so dumb, I am so glad it didn’t last long because it was just too bad), and after all that mix of just not interesting stuff he went right back to the Jason that he had at the very start. It was a waste of time, but I guess that he had to be there because he was an anomaly and all that. I just think that was DC’s first try at making Jason Todd/Red Hood something more than just a street-level vigilante and they failed miserably.

Tony S. Daniel in Batman: Battle for the Cowl.

Even though the first two did make mistakes with Jason’s characterizations, this man was the first to just throw UtRH out of the window and make up his very own version of Jason Todd. And his version was horrendous, that Jason had no problem with attempting to kill children and innocent people, he also really wanted to be Batman because Gotham needed a Batman and he wanted to be the person to wear the Cowl and he was looking for a Robin for himself.

I know, the whole concept is the perfect opposite of what Jason Todd and Red Hood were in UtRH. Every aspect of BftC Jason is based on nothing.

Jason wanting to be Batman because Gotham needed Batman is just the beginning of what’s wrong in this book. Jason became the Red Hood (in part) because he believed that Batman and his ways weren’t what Gotham needed so he made a better version of Batman with Red Hood (according to him) because Red Hood did what Batman refused to do. Another thing that is just wrong is Jason wanting, Damian, Tim or Dick to be his Robin, there is just so much wrong with this, first of all, Jason wanted Batman to stop having Robin because child soldiers ran the risk of dying at a very young age and that’s exactly how he saw the whole thing because that was what had happened to him. Second, if Jason was mad at Bruce for getting another Robin why would he now want one of his own to team up with his Batman? Damian was a child, Tim was someone that apparently Jason hated (because Jason beating Tim was mentioned in this event), and then Jason actually asked Dick Grayson, Nightwing, to be his Robin? Listen, there is no way that was Jason, nothing about him makes sense, even taking into account that Jason had beaten Tim already in this event Jason actually tried to kill both Tim and Damian (it might have been just one of them but yeah, it still doesn’t make sense).

I just don’t think that Tony S. Daniel knew who Jason Todd was, maybe he got confused but the thing is, his “villainous” and deranged version of Jason Todd allowed a villainous and deranged version of Red Hood to happen with the next writer that I will be talking about.

Grant Morrison in Batman and Robin vol.1 #3-6.

This was the birth of the villainous, deranged and bloodthirsty Red Hood. There is absolutely no trace of UtRH Jason here, not even if we are looking at the opposite of things like we could do with Daniel’s Jason. Grant Morrison wanted Dick and Damian to have a villain to match their Batman and Robin and they decided to give us a red-haired-pill-headed-red hood. Everything from Morrison’s characterization of Jason is crazy, from the red hair (hello pre-crisis) to the awful Joker’s Red Hood looking suit, everything was just weird.

I still don’t believe that was Jason, to be honest, I would rather think that version of Jason was actually a rouge Skrull that came all the way from the Marvel Universe and lost his way in Gotham City. Maybe when he made the jump between universes, he got too much information and got confused and took the form of the wonkiest Jason Todd he could come up with.

This Jason was absolutely deranged, he knew exactly what he was doing and he didn’t care if innocents died. This Jason was the one that got locked up in Arkham. This is the Jason that Dick put in Arkham for Jason and everybody else’s safety.

Dick putting that Jason in Arkham wasn’t a bad thing or something that anyone can use to shit on Dick Grayson (not on this house). This Arkham was reformed and that Jason knew that if he stayed in that new Arkham he would stay away from trouble, but here is the thing, that Jason loved trouble, so he took all the tests to prove he wasn’t insane and asked to be transferred to Blackgate (where all the Red Hood’s enemies were). That Jason didn’t ask to be sent to Blackgate because the Joker was a cell away from his in Arkham, he did it so he could go on a killing spree in Blackgate (which he did when he got there).

Skrull Jason was just bloodthirsty and nothing like UtRH Jason, he had no motive other than just killing for fun or whatever. He didn’t want to protect Gotham and he couldn’t have cared less about the drug trade in Gotham. In Batman and Robin vol.1. Jason Todd was unrecognizable. And luckily, we never saw him again.

Scott Lobdell in Everything that he ever wrote about Red Hood.

This one is pretty self-explanatory. Lobdell was the king of overpowering Jason, he was the one that drove Red Hood farther and farther away from his street-level vigilante status. He continuously added more to him, he was a big deal because he was meant to take down Ra’s al Ghul, he was a big deal because he was the only human to train in the All-Castle and learned to summon the All-Blades.

This Red Hood’s morals and ideals were kind of gone, there just wasn’t any kind of interest in Jason to get rid of drugs or try to control its trade in Gotham, he just had no interest in street-level threats, everything was extraordinary in both New 52 and Rebirth. If he wasn’t in space he was in some mystical land. His friends and allies became even more and more powerful, his level of power was completely off compared to the others. His personality was ever-changing and quite honestly you could barely see the Jason that he once was.

This Jason also was very inconsistent in the way that he felt towards people (obviously because Lobdell is a shitty writer), he wanted to follow Batman’s rules and was shown as someone that still had fond memories of his life with Bruce before he died but was also willing to let those memories go, to move on? Maybe? I don’t know. But he changed his mind about Bruce and following his rules or not for a very long time. Jason was also a little bitch about Dick, and he was a little bitch because he (Lobdell) never gave the reader or anyone a concrete reason as to why he hated him so much and then in Rebirth he decided that Dick wasn’t that bad. Also, Jason went from “Willis Todd, abusive husband and father that deserved to die” to “Willis Todd abusive husband and father but he sent me letters when he was in prison and Penguin had him killed so now, I really want to avenge him”. Yeah, I don’t really know why that happened and like most of Lobdell’s arcs and stuff it was never really completed or well thought out.

Lobdell’s Jason characterization was a mess for ten years and that’s the prime reason why Jason is a character with no solid background, story or future.

James Tynion IV in Red Hood and the Outlaws.

Tynion’s Jason Todd was a hero, he was like a mini Tom King Batman. Everything he did was right and there was just no way that you could bamboozle him. This Jason was able to hold to Blades that drained his soul as well as hosting the Untitled in his body (that were able to drain his soul too) and on top of all that he completed his journey of the Chosen One by making those ancient martial arts moves that he learned before he was Robin even though Talia hadn’t been able to master it yet.

Scott Snyder, Tim Seeley in Batman Eternal and Batman and Robin Eternal.

A mess, this was pure New 52 levels of bullshit and they all just wanted to push the “Batfamily” and while Dick was gone, they were trying to make Jason fill the void that Dick left in Batman events. It didn’t work at all and all they did was mess around with Jason’s characterization more.

Geoff Johns in Three Jokers.

I have talked enough about Johns’ takes on Jason Todd and Red Hood, but let me tell you something real quick, if a writer thinks that the best they can do with a character is make them give up their morals/ideals for an unrequited love interest, then they can keep that idea for themselves. Geoff Johns wrote a book that was absolutely not needed and then proceeded to butcher every characterization that he could, Three Jokers was three issues long and he managed to add more trauma to Jason’s torture, push the narrative of Jason being at fault for his own murder and make Jason’s motivations to be the Red Hood weak enough to make him want to give up his work for a woman that he barely knows (and doesn’t like him at all).

Joshua Williamson in Future State: Red Hood and Robin #5.

Now, with Williamson I have issues only when he writes Jason, not because his stories are bad, don’t get me wrong, I would have completely enjoyed FS: Red Hood if it weren’t for the completely unnecessary Rose/Jason side plot he had going on. Jason was clearly working undercover for some people that he hated working with. He had to arrest or kill “masks” (vigilantes, just like he “used” to be) for the Magistrate.

His ideas were pretty solid, Jason did the job but he never killed the masks and actively didn’t trust the Magistrate but he was working there to tear them apart from within, and that’s amazing if Williamson had given us Jason Todd/Red Hood working undercover to dismantle an organization I would have been really happy.

But that’s not all he gave us, even if I just forget about his failed attempt at giving Jason a relationship, I can still see that Williamson is the kind of writer that wants (or is just following DC) to make the “Batfamily” happen no matter how dumb and out of place it looks in comics’ canon. So, I am a little bit weary, any writer that leans too much towards making Jason and Bruce work together and become a family makes me want to scream, but I do understand that is just me, many people want those two to be buddy-buddy, I, personally, would love to see Jason kick Bruce in the balls and tell him to lose his number.

Chip Zdarsky in Urban Legends: Cheer.

Ah, yes, I remember the days in which I thought that this could have been something good. Well, I was utterly wrong and I suffered all the way through this mini. I feel like now I can safely say that Zdarsky only wanted to write a Batman book but DC told him, “Hey you can write Batman but it has to be within a Red Hood story, but don’t worry, you don’t have to know much about the Hood guy, just come up with something and write Batman around that”.

I know that’s what happened because I read that story and all we got from it was horrible characterizations for pre-Robin Jason, Robin Jason, Jason Todd and Red Hood. I don’t know how he did it but yes, he managed to mess it all up.

From Jason not really wanting to be Robin and acting recklessly every step of the way, to secret desires of a perfect family with Bruce and so many other people that he couldn’t care about, Urban Legends: Cheer is the perfect book to avoid at all costs if you believe that the concept of “Batfamily” is the biggest lie, DC is trying to profit off this time around.

Zdarsky also nerfed Jason in ways that I thought DC only wanted to nerf Dick Grayson. But I was able to see that I was wrong. Zdarsky’s run also pushed some of the most disastrous narratives that DC really wants readers to believe like: Robin Jason wasn’t good at his job, he was too reckless and ultimately his death was his own fault. Yay! I want to cry!

I will give Zdarsky two points for at the very least showing that Red Hood wants to protect children and that he has a huge issue with how the drug trade is controlled and abused in Gotham City, it had been a while since we had seen that aspect of Jason’s Red Hood make an appearance.

It’s just too many writers completely missing the point of Red Hood’s character or simply writers agreeing to destroy Jason’s uniqueness in the DC Universe so DC (as the publisher) can further push the abomination that is the “Batfamily” in comics’ canon.

I do agree with you Anon when you say that Jason isn’t just a “bad boy” but I also don’t think that we can call UtRH Jason “dangerously insane”. Personally, I will only use that last description for BftC and Batman and Robin Jason, those two were dangerously insane indeed.

UtRH Jason was very meticulous in who he wanted dead and who got to live. He entered Gotham’s most dangerous world and he had to make a big entrance, he invited the eight most prosperous street dealers to a meeting, showed up with the decapitated heads of each of their right-hand men and an AK-47 and said:

“I am offering you a deal. I will be running the drug trade from now on. You will go about your business as usual. You will kick up forty percent to me. That is a much better deal than the Black Mask will give you. In return, you will have total protection from both the Black Mask and Batman. The catch? You stay away from kids and schoolyards. No dealing to children, got it? If you do, you’re dead.”

This was Red Hood! Red Hood wanted to control the drug trade in Gotham because he knew that Gotham is far too corrupt and filled with drug lords for him to just want to eradicate drugs from Gotham. If he had tried that he would have been a dumbass, but he wasn’t. He didn’t want to start a gang war and get innocent people killed because of it, he wanted to set the rules of his new Empire and he had to start with the street-level drug dealers, from there he grew until he became a major pain in Black Mask’s ass.

We went from Jason wanting to control the drug trade and take over Gotham’s underworld so people like Black mask couldn’t have people work for him (or being dependent on him) when they were still in high school or were in a vulnerable position, to Jason fighting a war for a mystic land because he was their “Chosen One”. DC really wanted to do something grand (yet boring) with Jason instead of sticking to a street-level vigilante that could have become a Drug Lord to control the drug trade of a city that is so filled with crime and corruption that it can’t be saved by anyone.

Batman doesn’t eradicate crime, he “controls” it, puts a blank it over it, lets it nap up until it wakes up once more to make more mess.

Red Hood had other plans, certain criminals didn’t get to nap, or, better said, they would get to nap forever.

So, no. I wouldn’t call that “dangerously insane”, I will call that “vigilante that believes himself judge, jury and executioner” of a city that is drowning in crime and corruption.

Anyway, I hope you have a really nice week Anon and thank you so much for sending me this ask!

#jason todd #red hood #under the red hood #red hood and the outlaws #dc comics #future state red hood #three jokers #bftc #asksss

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bizarrebaby · 3 years

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Untouched

Pairing: Pero Tovar/Virgin!Reader

Work Count: 3.2k

Summary: You and Pero spend your first night together, which is your first night with anyone.

Warnings: you guys have penis in vagina sex. Some descriptions/mentions of violence, reference to painful loss of virginity, but we all know Pero’s too good to do that to you

You were a walking contradiction. Nothing was more confusing or intriguing to Pero Tovar than how you managed to exist in these times.

When he’d been introduced to you (it was generous to call it an introduction, seeing as Tovar more or less refused to acknowledge you at the time) he saw you the way he saw most everyone: an annoyance at best, a punishment from god at worst. When he glanced at you, he saw just a little thing, a girl who ought to be at home, out of her depths.

He first beheld your beauty through a veil of bloodshed. On the battlefield you had no equal. People throughout his travels often equated grace to beauty, but in observing you, Pero found that simply wasn’t so. You did not dance with the blade, like twirled silk. What you did was not akin to dancing. It was heavy and destructive, you took to you enemies with the crushing force of a mortar and pestle. You wielded the heavy and challenging kanabo, the force of which caved armor and shattered bones, man and beast alike. When you swung the heavy bat, you looked as a healer pounding medicine. The force itself was destructive, but it was delivered with the righteousness of someone who was preserving life.

You could not always use the kanabo, and you most certainly could not spar with it, for your opponents would be crippled by even a sporting blow. So Tovar sometimes saw your prowess with the sword, the staff, anything nearby. You made many an arrogant man eat their words.

Now, when he was to imagine a beautiful woman, he did not think of flowing locks and fair skin wrapped in silks. He saw sword-cut hair, an oversized tunic, the loosening laces on leather armor.

And beyond the fighting, you did not often make with revelry. Tense in the company of most others in your band of mercenaries, you kept away when they became excited. When you approached him, scowling as he wolfed down his food alone, he dreaded having to endure niceties, persuasions, and prattel from you, and had already decided to be as disagreeable as possible. To his utter surprise, you said nothing to him at all as you kept a couple of meters distance and ate your own meal. You did so day after day, and at first he had been paranoid that this was some plot at inching your way closer, that one day you would ruin this silence and reveal your true intentions. Until one night, Tovar found himself doing something unthinkable: initiating conversation. Or at least, speaking unprompted.

“You do not chatter like the others,” he stated almost mindlessly, not knowing what he was expecting by saying so.

“I try not to talk when I have nothing to say,” you admitted. You looked towards him, half illuminated by the distant, flickering fire.

He found himself studying every detail of your face from the corner of his eye. It was terrifying, for once wanting to observe and actually caring if he was noticed doing so.

“And,” you continued quietly, “they say you do not like to be disturbed.” That was a very kind way of rephrasing how he was often spoken of. In all likelihood, what you were actually told was probably more along the lines of ‘he’s a mean, miserable bastard who doesn’t like anyone’. Tovar didn’t know how he felt about your twisting such words into something that sounded… reasonable.

Understood.

“I don’t like being disturbed either.”

Now, when he was to imagine a beautiful woman, he did not think of lip rouge and silent, unnoticed steps, or curled, dark lashes, of coquettish smirks. He thought of a split lip, and the uneven pace of worn leather kicking at stray pebbles, of tired eyes rubbed with the back of the hand after looking into the fire too long, of the struggle to hold back a wide-mouthed yawn.

Through a few well placed miracles and the incessant meddling of others (William) the two of you had ended up together. And this was when Pero discovered what a contradiction you were.

You knew death in every facet… except for la petite mort.

While other girls snuck off with their paramours in experimental forays of intimacy, you were studying the blade, the staff, the bow, the kusarigama. Raised by a father and uncles who loved you, but did not know how to raise a young lady. Only how to raise a fighter.

When you didn’t scare off any potential suitors, they certainly did.

While younger than Pero, you were still fully grown, and had yet to even kiss a man until Pero had claimed your lips in a passionate fury on the night of his confession.

Pero did not fancy himself a teacher, he saw himself as a taker, one with no patience for uncertainties and incompetence. But for you, he would be anything. And regardless of what he was, what you deserved was a gentle touch. Subtle, comforting, patient, and understanding.

All words that had never been used to describe him.

Over time, the kisses grew deeper, the touches flirted further beneath the clothes, until the night came where he held you against him in his bed, eyes begging for more as you looked to him for guidance. Never had he been so frightened at the thought of bedding a woman. He was a scoundrel with hands only fit for killing, and he was terrified of hurting you somehow.

But he’d be damned if anyone else took this honor.

With every piece of clothing he stripped your body of, you looked at him with such trust. He felt your heart beating in his rough palms, like the flutter of a bird’s wings. Never before had he been responsible for something so pure, so delicate. His relations before you were intimacies he had paid for in coin, encounters that didn’t require any gentleness on his part, where he cared little about any pleasure or pain besides his own. If he were to do one thing in his life with tact and delicacy, it would be this, he promised himself.

“Tell me again, hermosa, how many before me have seen this beautiful body?”

“N-none. You’re the first, Pero.”

He hums in satisfaction, running his hands up your stomach to cup your breasts. His thumbs stroke over the hardening peaks, causing a hitch in your breath as you shudder.

“Oh, mi conejita, so sensitive,” he descends, taking a nipple in his mouth and sucking almost harshly for just a moment before pulling away, admiring how your breast shines with his spit. You squeak out a shaking moan. “I wonder if you’re this sensitive everywhere else? Don’t tell me. I’ll find out myself.”

You feel your cheeks heat at his words, feeling the urge to curl in on yourself and hide. But Pero keeps you bare to him as he lavishes eager attention on your breasts, enjoying the whines half-caught in your throat. By the time your nipples are perked and wet from Pero’s hot mouth, your blush has spread down to your collar. He pulls away slightly, gently guiding you to lay down. He takes your thighs in his strong hands and spreads them further apart. His thumbs spread your lips so get a good look at your pink, silky hole twitching with a need you’ve never known before.

Your breath hitches as one of his fingers traces along your sensitive lips, brushing against your clit briefly before beginning to sink into you slowly. He rocks it back and forth gently while admiring the rise and fall of your chest, the way your eyelids flutter as you go between wanting to watch and being too bashful to. His thumb gently strokes your clit as he works to ease in another finger, and you tense harshly at the new intrusion. He leans down to press a few reassuring kisses against your neck.

“Relax, querida. Let me in.” He whispers, moving his lips to your mouth in an effort to distract you as he coaxes you open. His cock was heavy and hard against the laces of his trousers. You would see it soon, but Pero doesn’t want to overwhelm you. Not yet, anyways.

You breathe deeply in an attempt to relax your muscles as Pero’s fingers reach farther than yours ever could, and it feels as if he holds all of your bodily feelings in the palm of his hand. He continues to coo endearments against your neck to comfort you.

“Bueno, bueno… you’ve gotten nice and wet for me, cariño, so good for me,” a smirk spreads across his face as he feels you tighten with his words. “Oh, you like it when I talk, niña?” He teases, increasing the pace as he pumps his fingers in and out of you, the tight circles he’s rubbing into your clit on the verge of driving you mad.

He parts from your neck to take a look at your face in pleasure, and finds himself enraptured by the slight furrow of your brows and the way your eyelids flutter when he strokes the right part of your insides. Your quiet huffing and mewling, combined with the way your cunt is gripping at his fingers, has him more riled up than he’d like to admit.

“Pero, I-I I think I’m gonna cum,” you whine, looking at him with pleading eyes. He bristles with pride as your hips move to meet the palm of his hand while chasing the pleasure he gives you.

“Cum then, muñeca. Cum for me.”

The coil in your belly winds so tightly it snaps, and white hot pleasure floods your system. Pero groans as you cream on his fingers, feeling his cock throb harshly for the umpteenth time tonight. A tremor wracks your body as the mercenary continues rocking his fingers gently to help you ride out your climax. When they withdraw, he doesn’t hesitate to lick them clean, much to your embarrassment. The sight of his tongue against your slick on his hand gives you… ideas. Ideas that will have to wait until another night, maybe.

He leans down to plant a chaste kiss to your lips before bringing you to sit up. He wants to see what else you’ve never done. Wants to know how curious you are.

Pero places one of your hands (which feel so small in his) against the tent in his pants, encouraging you to explore his body the way you’ve so graciously allowed him to explore yours. His tunic is already off, but of course, you’ve seen men shirtless before. His cock feels hot and hard through his trousers, and the apprehension is probably clear on your flustered face, but Tovar finds this entire situation incredibly arousing.

He’s no stranger to sex, but most of his previous sexual encounters had been paid for and, thusly, were with experienced (and sometimes jaded) partners. Though the size of his cock may have impressed a few, it had never been the first they’d seen, touched, or taken. This was different.

His eyes never leave your face as you bite your lip, occasionally looking to him for approval as you move to undo the laces on his trousers. His eyes are lidded and dark with desire, and a smile crosses his face, a little more genuine than the usual smirks he throws in your direction.

“Go on,” he urges, more gently than he knew himself capable. You finally slip down his waistband and smallclothes, and his cock lands heavy against his stomach as he reclines just slightly. You try to contain your startled gasp, attempting to seem less like the blushing virgin you clearly are. The way your lips part ever so slightly as you examine his red, leaking cock with nervous interest sends the mercenary reeling.

Pero almost takes your hesitance as fear, which he’s determined to quell, before you finally reach your hands out to run them along the hard length, drawing a ragged groan from him.

For a moment, Pero feels the strongest compulsion to take charge of you. To guide your head down and order you to get his cock nice and wet before he takes you, to see tears prick at your eyes while you struggle to take his cock in your little mouth.

But, somewhat regrettably, he remembers his first time with a woman well. He remembers the nerves burning against his skin like a thousand needles, the fear of performing well and doing things he’d never even imagined doing. He can only imagine that fear to be tenfold for a girl. You’ve spent years in the company of brash mercenaries, uncouth enough that they brag of their rough, bruising conquests. He knows the type. And what women you do meet often speak of intimacy with dread, or reflect on the pain of their first times.

You are one of the few things in Pero Tovar’s life that he has ever really cared for. And his greatest wish is to make you feel cared for. He has never known patience. But for you, he shall have it in spades. You’ll have plenty of time to play rough later. Or never, if that’s what you want.

Not to mention, he’s just about as hard as he’s ever been in his entire life, and he doubts he would last in your mouth, not with the passionate stare you’re giving him. You have, after all, always been a quick learner when it came to the sword. The way you start experimentally moving your hands along his cock confirm this, as he sighs in pleasure from the light pressure you’re giving him.

“This the first cock you’ve seen up close, hermosa?” you nod, and that teasing smile is once again set on his face. “What do you think of it?”

Your eyes widen just slightly at the question. He takes one of your hands and spits in it before letting you continue to stroke his cock, still patiently awaiting an answer.

“Are they all… like this?” Pero has a feeling he knows what you mean, but he wants you to say it.

“Like what, preciosa?”

“Big.”

He chuckles quietly before cupping your chin in his hand and bringing you towards him for another bout of fervent kisses. In these moments, and most others, he looks at you and sees everything he’s ever wanted. He presses his forehead to yours when he finally parts from your lips.

“No, amor, not all,” he pauses in thought, somewhat uncharacteristically. “Are you worried?”

“...Yes.” The mercenary appreciates your honesty. For your entire life, you have had to be brave. He doesn’t want you to have to be brave with him. He’s never been trusted with something as precious as you. He calls your name with the same softness he feels for you.

“I will never hurt you,” he promises. “And…” his need causes him to struggle with the next part. He’s still not used to being sensitive, not used to caring so much. “We do not have to do this.”

Pero can see the fire ignite in your eyes, that same passion he sees when you get up right after being knocked down.

“I want to, Pero, I want to. Will you take care of me?” his eyes have their own fire now. He guides you down onto your back once again and leans over you. His cock leaks against the soft skin of your belly as he kisses up your neck, sucking in marks as he goes.

“Forever,” he swears.

Pero hoists himself up to look into your eyes as his cock catches at your entrance for the first time. He pushes himself in just barely, giving you a little more each time as he shallowly rocks into you. He watches, feeling lovestruck, as your breasts rise and fall with each short breath you take as he eases himself deeper into your heat.

When Pero Tovar met you, he didn’t exactly respect you, but he wouldn’t have called you soft. You proved quickly that you were a better warrior than most men he’d met, and despite the roughness and inconveniences of mercenary life, you didn’t complain. In those early days, he’d have scarcely called you a woman at all.

But here you were beneath him, soft and warm, and everything he’d never imagined he could be trusted with. Long ago you reached your hands into his hardened chest, with all of its armor, and gripped his heart with all of the hope and reverence of a devout finding comfort in a rosary. The vice of your wet cunt on his cock was an extension of that. An inescapable binding that he had no desire to leave.

“You feel so good, querida, so tight and perfect against my cock.”

And so you pant, looking cherubic against the sheets with your splayed hair and flushed cheeks, lips plumped from Pero’s incessant kissing. The wet noises coming from between the two of you are obscene, and you love it.

“So good for me, amor, taking everything I have to give you.”

He wouldn’t last long. Not waiting as long as he has, not with you looking, sounding, and feeling the way you do. His thrusts aren’t punishing, but they sure as hell aren’t gentle, as he can only restrain himself from wrecking you for so long. And from the way he’s hitting that place inside that makes you sing, you won’t last either.

“Pero, I’m gonna— mmm I’m gonna cum again!” You keen, calling him back from his animalistic fervor. Pero stares into your eyes with a fire roaring behind his gaze.

“I want you to soak my cock, hermosa. Cum. Give me your pleasure, let me make you mine!”

“God— oh, fuck, I love you—“ you pant as he feels you clench deliciously around him. Any hope he had of holding on has fled now.

“Mi amor, let me cum in you, please, querida—“

“Please, do it Pero,”

You can feel the skin of his hips slap against yours as he pistons himself in and out of you, babbling about how beautiful you are and how good you feel until he can’t stand it anymore.

“Te amo, te amo, te amo!” He growls, ceasing his hips as he fills you with everything he has. You jolt at the sensation before relaxing again, his hot cum painting your walls. His elbows stop him from collapsing right onto you, but he can feel your breasts brush against his chest with every breath the both of you take.

He basks in this moment for a while longer before pulling himself out gently, resolving to clean the both of you properly later. Pero lets himself fall beside you in bed, still breathing a little heavily.

“Come here, querida.”

Pero stares at the ceiling as your weight comes to rest against his chest, warm in ways he cannot describe. The arm around you tightens, as if he wishes to pull you further into him.

“Are you… do you feel alright, mi amor? I didn’t hurt you?”

“Never, Pero. I feel wonderful. Was it ok? For you, I mean. I know I’m… you’re probably not used to being with someone so inexperienced,” you trail off, feeling palpably insecure. He gently puts his hand beneath your chin to coax you into looking up at him from his chest.

“You don’t have to be anything more than what you are to be perfect for me, amor.”

Taglist:

Pedro Pascal: @auty-ren

From the preview post: @josepedropascal @tintinwrites @computeringturtle @kiwi-the-first

#nsft #writing #drabble #the great wall #pero tovar #pero x reader #pero tovar x reader #tovar x reader #tovar the great wall #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader

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miraculous-trinity-leo · 3 years

Text

Whacky Gotham, Goofy New York, and Chaotic Paris.

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

Chapter 5: Then Let The Games Begin

•—–—–·†·–—–—•

Soooo, the Batfam is panicking, Gotham's confused as to why Iron Man is flying over Gotham like a madman, and Maria is with two of Gotham's Sirens (but only Ivy and Harley know this) having a wonderful time playing with Bud and Lou.

Let's start with the Sirens.

Harley is watching over Maria and Tikki as they sleep with Bud and Lou, Ivy walkes over to sit next to Harley, handing her a cup of tea.

"So, what's the diagnosis?" - Ivy

"She has some sort of trauma, has class issues... and handles more than she should, but still does everythin', on top of bein' a hero. She's been through some sh-t Pam." Yeah Harley may have found out Maria's a hero (if the tiny god and magic were anything to go by).

"Is she alone?" - Ivy

"No, thankfully, she has supportive parents, and friends that aren't little sh-ts. I think they're also heroes, she also has a lot, and I a mean A LOT of pent up emotions, she doesn't show anythin' negative, only positive things. She seems to shrink in on herself if she thinks she does somethin' wrong. Pam, we both know there's a limit to how much crap a person can take before they snap, and she's such a sweet kid. There has to be somethin' we can do to help her Ives." Ok she found out alot, but in Marias' defense, they have trustworthy souls, and they were the only other people (besides her friends) that she talked to about it, yes she had her Maman and Uncle to talk about hero stuff, but for the stuff her class does, she only ever vented (without being negative) to her friends.

"Her class is visiting the Botanical Gardens in three days, and it's a 2 part tour, so we can see just what's going on. If it's bad then we scare them a bit, if it's bad bad... they can handle a few slightly poisonous plants right?" - Ivy

"God I love the way ya think Ives, do ya think she can stay with us? I mean look at how cute she is with Bud and Lou... Oh my god, she's cuddlin' dem, and ya gave her a flower crown, how'd I miss that?! Where's the camera?"

Harley took a picture to remind her of this wonderful moment. As Ivy and Harley looked at the picture, they both promised to keep Maria safe, and maybe become sorta kinda-ish parents to her while she's in Gotham.

•—–·Now back to the Bat-Chaos Bat-Cave·–—•

Tim took over the chair and was now searching the possible locations with Jarvis, Damian was sitting on a different chair, trying to act cool, but he wouldn't stop looking over at Tim, to see his progress. Bruce was talking over the comms with Tony. Dick and Jason, weren't helping (they kept feeding each other worse and worse ideas of what could have happened to Maria). Then they heard Jarvis speak.

"I have found the most likely area Ms. Dupain-Cheng would be in. Her phone died about 56 blocks away from her hotel, if we don't count kidnapping, or murder, she would have thought about asking for directions, but may have decided not to considering the city she is in. So that leaves us with a possible 15-25 mile radius from her last known location. I think it best to divide into groups of two, have Oracle stay and update you if anything on security, and or traffic cameras happens. Bruce will be with Tony, Dick will go with Tim, and Jason will go with Damain to search within the area. Stephanie and Cassandra will search around a 5 mile radius near Wayne hotel." as Jarvis continued to explain the other details, the Batfam began to suit up, Batman met up with Iron Man, and they took the North area, Nightwing and Red Robin took the East area, while Red Hood and Robin searched the South. Steph and Cass were on foot in civilian clothes, searching the West area they were assigned.

They searched for the whole day, and came up with nothing. Until Oracle saw a video from a traffic cam around 9pm, 15 blocks away from where her phone died. She called it in and everyone went back to the cave. Once everyone was at the Bat-Computer, Oracle pressed play, the cameras didn't have sound, and it wasn't close enough to see if she was ok.

They watched as she went to an overgrown parking lot and sat down. She was looking down at the ground, and that's when they spotted two figures round the corner and spot her. They watched as the two figures approach Maria, and saw the startled reaction she had. They realized it was Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy that were talking to her, then they saw Maria collapse. They watched as Harley made sure she was ok, looking over to Ivy before looking back to Maria and picking her up. The last thing they saw, was Maria being carried away by two of Gothams' most dangerous rouges, but now they knew where to look next.

•—–· Back to Ivy and Harley ·–—•

Harley continued to take adorable pictures of the children.

"God, they're so f-ckin' cute!" - Harley for the 20th time

As Ivy continued to watch while caring for her plants, Catwoman walked in.

"Hey girls, got the stuff for movie night, so what are we- Holy mother of cats! He adopted another f-cking child didn't he! Where the hell does he keep finding them?! 7 was ment to be the god DAMN LIMIT!!!" - Catwoman

Maria jumped at the sudden shouting and may have accidentally summoned a yo-yo (one made useing creation magic and protection magic) before saying.

"Tikki where's the akuma?! How long was I out?! Forget it Tikki spot-" she then realized she wasn't in Paris, and seeing a new face, she also realized she just spilled her secret to another person within the same day... kinda

"Fffffffffffudge sunday that fell on the pavement!" - Maria shouted in baker profanities

"That's not how ya curse sweetheart. It should go more like-" Harley was cut off by a vine Ivy had summoned.

"Harley, cursing makes the plants sad, you know this." - Ivy said removing the vine

Harley just walked over to Maria and whipsered it in her ear.

"You're supposed to say it more like this, ' ..... .... ... .. ....... .. ... .....' ok?" - Harley ended with a big smile

"... I will never see this world in the same frickin' light ever again." - Maria

"ehh close enough." - Harley

"Can someone please tell me, WTH is going on here, on our special girls day off?!" - Catwoman

"She is a new member of the Sirens as of today, and as a member, she's unda our protection, so effective immediately." - Harley

"Cool." - Maria

"Harley." - Ivy

"Wut... first things first, if she is going to join, she needs to be very flexible, know how to fight, and be incredibly intelligent." - Catwoman

"She beat Ed's @ss with a gun pointed at her, and solved every riddle with ease, so I'm positive she'll be an amazin' addition to the team." - Harley

'God she sounds like a new mother now' "But we don't know how good her flexibility is." - Catwoman

"I know, hey Maria, ya wanna do some tricks with me, of course we need to stretch first, but do ya wanna give it a go?" - Harley

"Sure." - Maria

Ivy and Catwoman sat down on a couch a few feet away from where Maria and Harley stood in the empty part of the building. They started out with stretches, and to Catwoman's surprise (and Harley's delight) Maria copied Harleys streches perfectly.

"Ok, now that that's done, we'll start with some cartwheels, then move on to flips, then handsprings and so on." - Harley

Maria gave Harley a nod... and they were off... literally, Harley did a cartwheel into a handspring, and a few backflips, Maria executed it flawlessly. Harley did some more complicated gymnastics tricks, and Maria did it, Harley did triple backflips going into a cartwheel, into a summersault, and Maria did that perfectly as well. This went on until both Harley and Maria were slightly out of breath, both having massive smiles on their faces.

"Ives, please let her join, she's like a mini me." - Harley then hugged Maria and they somehow both tripled in cuteness as they both did puppy (or Puss In Boots style) eyes at Catwoman and Ivy.

"Sure Harley." - Ivy said walking over to give Harley a small kiss on the cheek.

"Okay... but she doesn't have a costume yet, and she still has to think of a name for herself." - Catwoman

"Is a mouse good, like a mouse themed costume, that or a Turtle themed one. What do you think Harley?" - Maria

"Mmmm, I like that with the mouse you can always toy with Cat, ya know, cat an' mouse stuff, turtle seems... weird even fawh Gotham, so personally I would pick mouse, just because of the cheesy jokes you could do." - Harley

"Very funny, ok then, give me a moment." Maria then reached out her hand, her eyes then started to glow an icy blue, and a small portal opened in front of her, she reached in and pulled out a small pendant necklace. After she put it on a small mouce appeared and greated itself, Marias' eyes going back to normal after closing the portal.

"Hello I'm Mullo, nice to meet you all."

"Omg omg omg, It's soooo f-ckin' CUTE!" - Harley

"Best to assume all of them are extremely cute Harls." - Ivy

"What the Hell did I miss in the week I was gone?!" - Catwoman

"Ehh, not much, oh but Iron Man did fly aroun' Gotham a few times earlier this mornin' like a madman." - Harley

"Oh sh-t." - Maria

"Maria are ya ok? That was ya first official proper curse in my presence." Harley said looking over to the girl.

"He's gonna kill me." - Maria

"Wait, what do you mean Marigold?" - Ivy

"... He's my Uncle, and I never got to text him I was ok, since my phone died before I met you." - Maria

"Hey, I'm sure he'll understand, now what are we watchin'?" - Harley

"I think we have more important matters other than movies at the moment!" - Catwoman

"Ok, Me Myself and Irene it is." - Harley

"No! You basically kidnapped Iron Mans' NIECE!!!" - Catwoman

"Technically, she fainted and us bein' the good Gothamites we are, decided to take her with us, to make sure she was a-okay." - Harley

"I'm ganna need more than just a six pack of soda to get me through this... Just put the movie on already." - Catwoman

Catwoman sat at the far left end of the couch, next to her sat Ivy, then Maria, and then Harley, Bud and Lou by their feet. All of them sharing one big blanket (Becuase if Iron Man did show up, or any of the birds, then Maria was in a protective burrito and they may not see her right away) and they started the movie.

•—–·–—•

"Oh god, the poor cow." - Maria

.........

"Hahahaha, he stuck a whole f-ckin' chicken head in that guys @ss" - Harley

"The poor chicken." - Maria

"Maria you don't want to see this part." - Ivy then lightly covered her eyes for the ehem, chicken extraction.

.........

"Anyone up for another movie?" - Harley

"That depends." - Ivy

"Any suggestions Cat?" - Harley looked across to the other end of the couch to see Catwoman already sleeping.

"She took her cat-nap already? Seriously?" - Harley

"... What about Pirates of The Caribbean?" - Maria

"I'm good with that." - Ivy

And they started the next movie, Maria was happy, it felt like when her maman and papa would sleep with her when she made a pillow fort. It was a loving atmosphere, it felt safe, and nothing could ruin it. Marias' eyes became heavy, and she leaned her head on Harleys' shoulder, falling asleep after a few minutes.

Ivy paused the move looking over to see both Harley and Maria sleeping, soon Ivy also fell asleep in the comfortable silence.

…………………………

Around an hour later Maria woke up in a panic, she had a nightmare, and kept looking around frantically for someone with tears running down her face.

"What's the matter hun?" - Harley said looking around to see if someone had gotten in. When she looked back at Maria she saw that she was crying.

"What happened?" Harley asked in a kind voice that was filled with motherly love.

"I, just *hic* had a bad dream that's *hic* all, I'm fine." - Maira said trying to wipe the tears away.

"You're ok, I promise nothin's goin' to happen to ya as long as Ivy and I are here, ok hun?" - Harley hugged Maria, and she could feel the girl let out a few more sobs, and quick breathes.

"Thanks Maman." Maria didn't even realize what she had said, it just felt natural for her to say it.

"You're welcome hun." 'Omg I'm gonna cry, she called me maman!' Harley rubbed small circles over Marias' back, and began humming until she fell asleep, she continued to hug Maria until she also fell asleep.

•—–· Back to the Chaos Bat-Cave ·–—•

"What do you mean she's with two of Gotham City's Sirens?!" - Tony

"Tony, calm down, I'll call Selina, she can talk to them and get this all sorted out." - Bruce

"Your fiancee is a Gotham Siren too?! Why didn't you tell me?!" - Tony

"Why isn't she picking up? And unlike some people, this family doesn't like outing our secret identities... on live TV." - Bruce

"Oh well excuse me for not keeping my secret identity a SECRET!" - Tony

"I'll try calling her one more time." - Bruce

"Bruce, it's 3am. Who in their right mind ever stays up this late.... aside from this family." - Tim with a giant coffee mug in hand.

"... I'll just call her one more time." Bruce then connected it to the Bat-Computer so everyone could hear.

•—–· Back to the Sirens ·–—•

Catwoman's phone is ringing like crazy, waking everyone up, including a tired, annoyed, and confused Selina.

"Wth does he want at 3 in the morning?!" - Selina

"Just answer it so we can keep sleepin'." - Harley still hugging Maria

"I'm putting it on speaker, so you lot can testify against his @ss in court, for disturbing the peace."

•—–· Over to Batsy ·–—•

"Selina I need to ask-"

"WHAT THE F-CKING HELL DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND ABOUT A GOOD NIGHTS REST!" - Selina

"Oooooh, she sounds pissed Bruce." - Jason

"I'm sorry to call you at this hour, but we need to find a girl that looks just like every single one of my other kids." - Bruce

"Bruce... I thought we agreed that 7 kids was. the. f-cking. limit." - Selina

•—–· Back to the Sirens ·–—•

Selina looked over to Maria before muting the speaker.

"Do you want them to know you're here Kitten?" - Selina

"... I'm tired, I haven't had coffee, I have no filter, so f-ck it, act like you never saw me today, and let them drown in chaos. " - Maria

"I think I like filter less Maria." - Harley

"Okay." Selina shrugged her shoulders and then un-muted her phone, putting it back on speaker mode.

"Where was she last seen?" - Selina

"She was last seen with Harley and Poison Ivy, I want you to see if she's still with them." - Bruce

Selina looked over to Maria and Harley, both of them shook their heads with mischievous grins.

"I've been with them all day, and I haven't once seen a girl that looks like your kids. Now can I go back to sleep, and forget this ever happened?" - Selina

"WHERE IS MY NIECE!!!" - Tony

"Oh, hey Tony, didn't know you were there, don't know who, or where your niece is, but good luck trying to find her. Oh and Bruce, I'm shutting my phone off so you don't keep calling till the butt crack of dawn. And congrats it's now 4am. you owe me a lunch date, uh-ba-bye." Selina then hung up her phone and turned it off.

"That went pretty well if you ask me, now I'm going back to sleep." - Selina

•—–· Back to Batsy ·–—•

The room was silent for a few minutes before Jason spoke up.

"Does that mean that Pixiepop ran away and is even more lost now?!" - Jason

"Oh god, what do we do, what if she got hurt?!" - Dick

"What if she got kidnapped?!" - Jason

"What if she's with a big time Gotham Villain?!" - Dick

"... What if she got more coffee?" - Tim

"Oh Hell No" - Jason/Dick

"... Lets all go to sleep, and when we wake up, we'll head over to their base and double check. She could've just said that because I called her at 3am." - Bruce

"But my niece is still out there!" - Tony

"You're going to sleep Tony." - Pepper then dragged Tony to his room.

•—–· Back to Maria ·–—•

Selina went to a different part of the building, where Maria assumed the bedrooms were. Ivy had gone to the greenhouse to be with the plants, and now it was just her and Harley left on the couch, and she couldn't sleep.

"... Harley?" - Maria

"Yeah hun?" - Harley

"I can't sleep." - Maria

"Well, watcha wanna do till ya get tired?" Harley asked sitting up a little straighter to get a better look at Maria.

Maria gave a sly smile, and looked Harley in the eyes "Want to go free-running on the rooftops?"

"... Alright, but lets get some coffee, and a snack in us first." - Harley gave her a side hug, before getting up to go make the coffee, and grab some snacks.

After they had their coffee, they climbed to the roof of the base. Harley was in her outfit, bat in hand and ready to do some bonding.

"So, how does ya outfit work?" - Harley

"Like so, ready Mullo?" - Maria

"Yes Maria" - Mullo

"Ok, Mullo, Get Squeaky!" A bright light flashes, and when Harley could see again, Maria was in a dark gray suit, wearing black knee high boots, with a strip of pink at the knee, and black elbow length gloves with the same pink strip at her elbow. Her mask was a slightly lighter gray on the top part, and pink on the bottom. Her hair was pulled into two buns with pink ribbons that faded to gray, and to black at the very tip. Her jump rope around her waist forming a tail going just below the back of her knees.

"Just when I think ya can't get any more adorable. So what should I call ya?" - Harley

"You can call me Multimouse." - Maria

Soon they were racing and doing tricks off different roofs, they were really enjoying themselves. From one of the roofs they heard a commotion in one of the alleys, when they looked down they saw a man holding a woman at gunpoint.

"Not good, seems like he's got issues, probably lost his lover, most likely has additions to drugs and alcohol, and seems to be a little tipsy." - Harley

"I've got a plan." - Multimouse

…………

Multimouse droped a little way behind the guy, grabbing his attention while Harley got the lady to safety.

"You know there's a help center two blocks from here that would be more than willing to help you." - Multimouse

The crook just raised his gun to her trying to keep it steady as he spoke.

"Give me all your money little girl, or else I'll hurt you."

"1. That's not how you hold a gun. 2. That is no way to treat any girl. and 3. Instead of money, I'll give you my jump rope." - Multimouse

"Why the hell would I want your jump rope, that thing looks worthless." the crook lowered his guard enough as Multimouse pretended to hand over her jump rope, only to use it in a quick motion to dismarm the man, as Harley promptly knocked him out with one swing.

"Lets neva have ya at gunpoint again, okay hun? I'm afraid my heart can't take it." - Harley said while tying the crook to a lamppost.

"Sorry, but it was the best idea I could come up with at the moment, besides, any guy with a gun would feel like they have the upper hand if they're facing a random little girl with a jump rope, rather than Gothams' Harley Quinn with a bat." - Multimouse

"Sadly I'm just too popular with the kiddos on the street." - Harley

…………

They continued to stop a few more muggers on the way back to the base, and when they got back they peaked around the corner to see the whole Batfam plus Iron Man talking with Ivy and Selina.

"How much you want to bet we can get back out before they see us?" - Whispering Multimouse

"... Lets try hidin' in the kitchen." - Whispering Harley

As they tried to sneak by (still in their costumes) Selina just walks over and draggs them to the group.

"Here, now let me sleep!" - Selina

"Dang it Selina we wanted tah see just how long we could hide out in the kitchen!" - Harley

Selina did a double take now realizing they both went out.

"... You didn't." - Selina

"We wanted tah go free-runnin'! So what?" - Harley

"She could've gotten hurt Harls." - Ivy

"My suits magic, I am invulnerable to bullets, normal magic, swords, knifes, anything staby staby, and I can withstand any temperature in it." Multimouse said with a slight pout.

"Hold up, is she a magical girl?" - Red Hood in the background

When Selina let go both Harley and Multimouse went behind Ivy for protection.

"We can still make a run for it." - Harley whispered to Multimouse

"... Ok, I'll meet you on the roof." - Whispering Multimouse

Harley gave a nod as she slowly inched her wasy closer to the door that lead to the roof, as she saw Iron Man approach Multimouse.

"Please get out of your suit, we need to talk about why you're here-" - Iron Man

"Multitute!" - Multimouse

Harley then saw Multimouse shrink into dozens of tiny little versions of herself as her clones spread out in all directions, one of which was heading right for her.

"Wth, you never told us she could use magic!" - Red Robin

Harley picked her up, and slipped through the door without anyone noticing.

"That was great, but how do ya get back tuh normal size?" - Harley

"Simple, I just merge back with my clones." As she said this, all her clones came back, and she merged with herself, becoming normal sized again.

"Where to?" - Multimouse

………… So now The Batfam is trying to find many long gone Mini-Multimouses, and Harley seems to have disappeared with her. Harley and Multimouse are now running over the roofs, heading for Wayne Manor.

"So why are we going to Wayne Manor?" - Multimouse

"Because, Batsy will neva think of lookin' for us at his own home, at least not fawh a little while." - Harley

When they arrived at the Manor, Multimouse de-transformed as Harley knocked on the door.

"Ms. Quinn, Ms. Maria, pleasure to see you here, please come in." - Alfred

"Are any of the bat-birds here?" - Harley

"Ms. Barbara, Ms. Stephanie, and Ms. Cassandra are the only ones here at the moment." - Alfred

"Do ya think you can keep us bein' here a secret from Batsy?" - Harley

"Harley? What are you doing here with Maria?" - Barbara

"It seems that Ms. Harley and Ms. Maria are now playing hide and seek with the rest of the family." - Alfred

"Did someone say hide and seek?" - Steph

"Yes, so could we maybe try and keep this a secret from everyone else, please?" - Maria

"Sure, it was starting to get boring around here. We can all hide in the living room no one ever use. Barbara you show them the way, I'll get the food/drinks and boardgames." - Steph

"Is this alright with you Alfred?" Maria

"It's all right Ms. Maria, you can hide out in the old living room." - Alfred

"Thanks Alfie, ya the best." - Harley

"Thank you Alfred." - Maria

"Ok then, follow me." - Barbara

…………

In the old living room, Harley, Maria, Barbara, Steph, and Cass began to formulate a plan.

"Ok, so the best way for them to never find you is to have your phone off, stay away from any and all cameras, and show your face to no one." - Steph

"So, do you have anything in mind that you might want to do?" - Barbara

"Can we put them on a wild goose chase?" - Maria

Cass nodded to Marias' suggestion approvingly.

"I can hack a few traffic cams to help with that." - Barbara

"We can also throw in some useless hints, to throw dem even further off our scent." - Harley

"Good idea Harley." - Barbara

"Thanks, but how long do ya think we should make it last?" - Harley

"As long as Maria wants it to." - Barbara

"Then let the games begin." - Maria.

•—–—–·†·–—–—•

Chapter 5 complete. Hope everyone is stayin' safe, Rockin' those Positive Vibes, and havin' an absolutely wonderful day. BUG-OUT 🐞💮🐞

〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜Tag List〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜

1st Place★: @animegirlweeb ☕ , 2nd Place★: @jumpingjoy82, 3rd Place★: @zalladane, 4th Place★: @jayjayspixiepop, 5th Place★: @arty-shadow-morningstar, 6th Place★: @smol-book-nerd, 7th Place★: @irontimetravelflower, 8th Place★: @fandom-trapped-03, 9th Place★: @meme991001, 10th Place★: @buginetye, 11th Place★: @blackroserelina, 12th Place★: @jessigurl-design, 13th Place★: @adrestar, 14th Place★: @moon5608, 15th Place★: @little-bluestar, 17th Place★: @myazael, 18th Place★: @our-preciousss, 19th Place★: @wolf2118, 20th Place★: @nyx-in-line, 21st Place★: @kking13, 22nd Place★: @lunerlover2024, 23rd Place★: @moonlightstar64, 24th Place★: @corporeal-terrestrial, 25th Place★: @kashlyn, 26th Place★: @tbehartoo, 27th Place★: @heart-charming, 28th Place★: @solangelo252, 29th Place★: @t1dwarrior-of-earth, 30th Place★: @lady-phoenix-of-tardis, @lupagrimm

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incorrect-ikevamp-quotes · 3 years

Note

Hi! I love everything that you write and heh I am a fan! 😄 tbh this is my first time requesting something on Tumblr! If you don't mind and if I am not being a bother...can you write about how the guys would react If MC suddenly starts making meme references? I don't know how I got the idea but I am REALLY curious. And love you! :D

Hiya! Tyvm for the kind words, and apologies that this took a while! I hope you have the chance to enjoy it regardless ❤️❤️❤️ Love you too, sweet pea! I promise to get to the next request you’ve sent ASAP~

Aight but this would be hilarious because the range of the reactions is just ungodly. I will be putting this under a cut after Napoleon so I don’t clog up everyone’s dash, but all the suitors are included below otherwise!

Comte is the one that recognizes a few, but didn’t really stay in modern times long enough to be as well-versed as a Gen Z kid might. Regardless he finds the wittiness and absolute chaotic fuckery to be delightful, and will 100% support the harmless nonsense. It never fails to get a laugh out of him

Mozart that first day be like: “Buzz off MC I hate you” MC, because she likes swinging bats at wasps’ nests: “Well that’s not very cash money of you” Mozart: ?????????? Comte, giggling in the bg like the secret fae he is This one’s just because I’m petty, but after the events of Comte rt I just imagine them encountering Vlad again and MC’s just “I lived bitch.” while Comte is flipping him off behind her lkjahgkjhdsg

Comte @ Leo when he finds the latter under his desk: Had it not been for the laws of this land, I would have slaughtered you. MC: wheezing from the hallway as she’s about to give him his letters

MC: So how was your day, honey? Comte: Good, good--briefly had to go beastmode upon the punk that pilfered my lint roller MC, biting her lip to keep from laughing: So does Leo still have his kneecaps? Comte: for now.

Comte, @ literally anyone upsetting the MC: I won’t hesitate, bitch

Comte: Be careful with my emotional baggage, it’s designer

MC: What if I was evil and ran towards you at very fast speeds Comte: My arms are strong, I would catch and hug you

Leo and Dazai are the ones that don’t have a single reference point but are filled with so much dumbass chaos energy that they just. Understand immediately???? Nobody knows how or why, but they just catch on so fast--adapt the language in a matter of weeks. Never underestimate the power of combined boredom, depression, and humor

I swear to god I just see MC taking them their Blanc/Rouge and being like “here you go sir, one enslaved moisture” and they just go fucking hog wild from day one. MC starts impersonating Theo when he leaves the room around Dazai, like fake deep voice “you all only hate me because you do not like me and I am mean to you. grow up.” Or like the MC meets a baby on her travels with Leo around town and she holds them and says v seriously and sagely “So you are Baby? I have heard tales of your exploits.” and Leo about loses his shit right there. They both think MC is the funniest person alive--they’ve never been more eager to throw a ring at someone in their entire life.

Also a bonus for my beloved Dazai: MC, facing even the slightest inconvenience (like dropping her fork) in the most dramtic voice possible: Life is not daijoubu. Dazai: wheezing

MC, after watching Theo turn down a woman at the bar in the meanest way possible: bro quit letting the darkness consume you u r scaring the hoes Dazai, literally rolling around on the ground, half-drunk and dying:

MC, walking alongside Dazai and stopping to stare at her reflection in the River Seine. Dazai’s expecting some sad or twisted shit, since people often feel comfortable talking about those things around him, but instead she just: “Oh, it’s you. The source of all my problems.” And he about falls into the river from shock HAHAHA

At this point don’t be surprised if his next book is about an absolute madlad woman similar to MC

Napoleon finds it to be a delightful quirk more than anything? He doesn’t really understand it, but he finds it funny when they change their voice for effect or speak in exaggerated tones. If it’s just comprehensible enough for an outsider to understand--or Sebas gives him context--chances are it’ll send him into a laughing fit

For this one I just imagine MC singing that Ratatouille meme song obnoxiously bad while cooking, and Napoleon and Comte are just so wildly amused by it bc it makes zero sense and it’s only vaguely French at this point

MC @ Napoleon while they’re cooking brunch: Can I offer you a nice egg in these trying times?

MC, conflicted because she’s tired and wanted to sleep in but also got to see Napo’s cute sleeping face for a few hours: For my next stunt, I’ll wake up at 5AM on the day I can sleep in. Sebas: Early to bed and early to rise makes a person healthy, wealthy, and wise MC: early to bed and early to rise makes me a massive bitch Napoleon: laughing in agreement

Isaac is the type to be bewildered and concerned at first (especially when he hears the more nihilistic ones hoOOOoooOO BOY) but eventually begins to understand it’s some bizarre attempt at humor (that hurts Zack baby). While some part of him laments that it reminds him of Dazai and he’s secretly jealous of how she and Dazai bond over it, he will sometimes join in the chaos when the mood strikes him and he’s feeling mischievous

Isaac: How are you feeling? MC: Oh, I’m not Isaac: seconds from dialing 911 Isaac: Are you okay? MC: Oh yeah dw I just suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes you look like you’re an angry serial killer Isaac: say sike rn

Isaac, tutoring MC and correcting something: MC, muttering while redoing it: The risk I took was calculated, but man am I bad at math. Isaac: unable to help a laugh

One time MC was avoiding Isaac for fear of hurting his feelings and he just confronts her like: Isaac: back by unpopular demand, me! What’s wrong, MC pls MC was so hecking proud of him

Isaac, telling MC about a recent discovery he learned at uni from another professor: bones typically heal stronger after they’ve been broken--so long as they’re set properly, of course MC, looking him dead in the eyes: So what you’re saying is that I should break every bone in my body until I become superhumanly powerful? Isaac: please do not, no

Mozart and Jeanne are just. Totally lost. Why are you talking like that??? Why are you making “crab hands”???? They don’t understand. Maybe never will. They reach a point where they just kind of laugh and shake their heads, endeared by the oddity after they’re used to it and have determined it isn’t a threat/insult.

MC: It’s a cold and it’s a brooooken, Waluigi. Waaaaluigiiiii...waaaahluigi..... Mozart: surprised, then starts snickering and playing along on the piano

Arthur, asking MC very personal questions out loud because he is an idiot sometimes: Soooo MC, are you a top or a bottom? MC: I’m a threat. (If he asks a second time, the response will be “Wouldn’t you like to know, weatherboy.”) Jeanne, fighting a smile:

MC, about to punch an asshole: Your free trial of being alive has ended Jeanne, seconds from laughing for the first time in 100 years:

Also, because I genuinely can’t help myself. You know that knight meme like “Parry this you fucking casual.” I cannot stress enough that it is literally the personification of Jeanne’s entire character. I’m not even joking.

Arthur and Shakespeare are utterly fascinated by the rapid evolution of wordplay and the sheer hilarity. They will ask all about these so-called “memes” and ask for examples of them if MC can show them (either somehow accessing her phone or drawing them). MC draws Arthur the knife cat meme and he about a s c e n d s at the hilarity of it all, points and yells THEO IS HOLDING THE KNIFE. He is correct. They will be delighted and follow along eagerly, and--god forbid--will make their own based on late 19th century struggles.

Is this where Shakespeare got the idea for “What, you egg? stabs him” and “You are a saucy boy.”? I’m too scared to ask. Don’t even get me started on “The Fool jingled miserably across the floor.” That one is just too on the nose...

I can’t even imagine what would happen to Shakespeare if MC like translated vines and memes into Ye Olde English around him. Imagine she’s at one of those noble balls and hears rumors of these two guys living together and they’re so obviously gay and he says “And those gents w’re roommates.” And in the most false surprised tone ever MC just replies “oh mine own god, those gents w’re roommates.” Imagine having a wife that’s just as hilarious as you are and hits you with all the force of a bag of wet mice every time you speak in retaliation, he’s going into palpitations.

Every time Arthur does smth stupid MC just: “I Pretend I Do Not See It.”

Vincent is tickled pink by MC’s penchant for finding joy and/or amusement in nearly everything they do, and he smiles gently when he sees them muttering and laughing to themselves. He wants to be able to join them in what they love, but he has a harder time following along and understanding the darker humor sometimes. Mostly gets confused??? Please give him the easier ones to mimic and laugh when he tries--or just include him in your jokes MC. He’s babie your honor...

But he also. Will not. Stand any kind of self-deprecation or borderline verbal self-harm. He’s usually very easygoing and calm, but for whatever reason that stuff makes him go deathly quiet and upset.

MC, after something goes horribly wrong, hugging Vincent: Oh Vince, we really in it now Vincent: giggling a little despite his worries, relaxing

MC: Theo stop simping for Vincent that’s my job

MC, when Theo leaves the room and she gets Vincent all to herself: The evil is defeated.

MC: And this is where I would put my will to live...if I h a d one! Vincent: ;-; MC: oh shit, oh fuck, I was only kidding Vincent wait (MC was subsequently lectured and loved on for many hours)

Theo is conflicted because on the one hand, he loves to see you smiling and having fun. On the other, you’re clowning as hard as Dazai and Arthur and he can only handle so many monkeys in his circus. Most of the time he will roll his eyes and be the straight man of this comedy, but you might find him cracking a smile--or accidentally letting a chuckle slip past his lips now and again.

MC, after meeting Theo: I’m a nice person, but I’m about to start throwing rocks at people.

Theo, those first days: Oh? You’re approaching me? Instead of running away, you’re coming right to me? MC: I can’t beat the shit out of you without getting closer.

Theo: Every time I ask MC to explain “vibe check” to me she hits me with some kind of improvised weapon

MC, after the “incident” (you know the one): This year, I lost my dear lover Theo Theo, in the distance: QUIT TELLING EVERYONE I’M DEAD! MC: ;-; sometimes I can still hear his voice...

Sebastian is last because oh boy. OH BOYYYYY I LOVE HIM. Okay so the way I see this happening with Sebastian is just. So wild. Because at first he’s t r y i n g so hard to be the proper butler man. He does not meme. But then he starts to drift closer to what Niles from The Nanny was, where he’ll quip and joke in private or when the situation is just beyond the amount of absurdity he can handle without making a snarky comment. Everyone in the house can’t fathom how Sebas and MC got so close so fast, but there are points where they’re just “Are they even speaking English anymore???” It’s 11 times funnier than normal because Sebas almost never smiles or laughs when memeing, the deadpan quality of his playing along sends MC every time

Has ABSOLUTELY said “HEY. PANINI HEAD. ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME???” jokingly when MC made a mistake in the kitchen. They laugh about it for y e a r s

MC: I can’t date someone who keeps a lamb as a pet, that’s so weird Sebas, brushing Lotte in front of MC: MC: MC: Okay, I will make an exception because she looks very polite

MC and Sebas, fully aware of the fame some of the men will reach in modern times: We will watch your career with great interest. (I s2g that’s like half of Sebas’ rt right there I’m crying)

Sebas rt with Lotte be like that 500 dollar Mareep meme: “sometimes a family can be just a boy, his gf, and their 500 dollar two foot tall Lotte”

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mysticprofessoralienhumanoid · 3 years

Text

A Daminette Penpal AU - Continuation

Continuation of this post

@ab-unreachablevoice @startouchedqueen1318 @lovemidnighteclipse12 you asked, I deliver.

Now, I want all of you to know this AU was made in a spur of moment. I’m totally winging it rn.

So obviously before the akuma class goes to Gotham, the months of texting have to have passed.

For Damian, those months are hell, because not only does he have to hear Jon’s gushing about his awesome penpal, but he has to endure Lila’s lies and her stories that keep only getting more ridiculous as the time passes too.

And it better be fucking worth it, because you have no idea how close he’s to flying to Paris and finally putting his assassin’s skills into use.

I mean, look at this!

Lila: HI Damian!!!! ❤💖💕💋💞

Damian, cringing at his phone: Yes?

Lila: How r u????

Damian, who absolutely hates when someone types like that: Have been better

Lila: Would u like to maybe video chat???? I could tell u about my trip to Achu !!!!!

Damian, a little shit™: Did “u” know that using more than three (3) exclamation (!) and question (?) marks means “u” may have a personality disorder? Maybe that’d explain the amount of lies “u” like to spew so much.

(Oof-)

[Message read. This user is offline.]

I’m convinced that if Damian knew how to use gifs, he would 100% use a lot, and I mean a lot, of cat gifs (honestly, animal gifs in general).

Lila: Hi Dami!!!! (She doesn’t learn, okay.)

Damian: I hope you can understand the message.

She can.

Lila: Hi dami. Can I call u Dami???

Damian: No.

Lila: I had so much fun this weekend Dami!!!! I went to Brazil Turns out Chris Pratt is filming a new movie there. Anyway, he recognized me and we started talking. His so much fun!!!!!! 🥰🤩😍😍🎉🎉

Damian: Fascinating. Please do not tell me more.

Damian: And it’s “he’s”, not “his”.

Heh.

Lila: Hiii Damiii

Damian: I literally hate you so much-

[Message not sent]

Lila: Dami????

Lila: ....

Lila: Um, Damian? U there????

[Message not read]

You have no idea how, much fun making these is-

Oh, and imagine, just imagine, if Lila told him about situation in Paris.

Lila: Sorry for texting you so late, damiboo. Got caught up in an akuma attack.

Damian, who by now is replying just to humor her (plus his father forced him): A what?

And then Lila starts explaining the situation in Paris. Of course, she adds a few stories about how she was akumas’ target or how she helped Chat Noir (weirdly she doesn’t talk much about Ladybug). It’s that one of really rare times she’s not lying (well, not that much). And how Damian reacts to it?

Damian, Done with Lies™: Do you ever stop lying? Because this, all of this, is absolutely and utterly ridiculous.

Cue Lila wishing she didn’t bullshit as much as she did Damian was just a little more gullible

Anyway.

I don’t know if you remember, but in the first part I said Damian ditched Lila for Marinette (but let’s be honest, wouldn’t we all?).

To clear things up, I kinda wanted the GA students to accompany their penpals throughout their time at school. It’d be nice, right?

So the scene is:

The principal has just announced that GA students have to keep company their penpals while they’re at the GA establishment. Lila’s feeling victorious, this is her chance to get her claws in Damian and his money- I mean, to get to know her lovely penpal. Yeah...

Lila, walking up to Damian, while trying to appear sexy and shy at the same time, and failing at both: So, shall we?

Damian, ostentatiously glancing at her before going to Marinette: Bye

Now, to spice things up, I decided imma get them caught up in a rouge attack/attacked by a rouge.

So somewhere a week in their stay, akuma class is held hostage by one of the Gotham’s criminals.

Because this is Gotham, y’all. You can’t be in Gotham and NOT get attacked some way or another. It’s impossible.

[Choose your villain. I have badass Marinette though, so we all know the winner here]

The moment it starts, Damian slips away and changes into Robin.

Meanwhile:

The class is screaming and panicking.

Lila is probably in the middle of a panic attack.

Marinette’s assessing the situation before striking.

The moment Robin arrives, he gets to witness Marinette, the sweet cinnamon roll Marinette, kicking ass and taking names. Adorable. He thinks he’s in love (and he so is).

Bats come. And they’re met with the dude dealt with and trembling in fear of a petite girl with pigtails, who’s standing next to him and a lovestruck Robin staring at said girl.

A sight to behold, truly.

Also, what if Damian accidentally texts Lila instead of Marinette after the attack? And Lila is so happy, because she thinks her plan’s finally working. But ohoho, does Damian have surprise for her.

Damian: Are you sure you’re okay? The attack was really dangerous, You’re sure you’re fine?

Lila, thinking ‘yes, fucking finally. Almost thought you have no feelings’ : Oh, it was so scary !!!!!! 😱😰😨😨😨 [just hella lot of emojis. She seems like that kind to me] I was absolutely terrified!!!! I’m just glad that it’s all over. After the attack Robin came up to check up on me. He even flirted with me, i think he likes me... Too bad I already like someone else 😘😘😘😘😘😘

Lila: But don’t worry, dami!!!! I’m a little shaken up, but overall okay. But if you want to we can facetime so you can make sure I’m not injured ;*

Damian, having to physically restrain himself fro throwing his phone against the wall: ...

Damian: Fuck.

Damian: Wrong number.

Lila: ಠ_ಠ

---------

And of course I’m involving Twitter. Who do you think I am?

At first it was one of of his siblings who posted a post about how he’s seething at his phone, probably his penpal texted him something again.

But do you seriously thing Damian would pass such an amazing opportunity?

Haha.

No.

He immediately posts his follow up and it goes downhill from here. He adds shit ton of tweets about her, making Lila famous (and she doesn’t even know she is).

People don’t know whom to pity more; Damian, for having a horrible and lying penpal, or said penpal, for having an enemy in the Ice Prince of Gotham?

The hashtags #IcePrince’sPenpal #PenpalNightmare #MenaceOfAPenpal are created and are trending every day.

Many say it’s the most active he’s ever been.

---------

Lila is not stupid in this, okay? A pathological liar and a manipulator, yes, but for that you need brain and she has one. Much to Damian’s surprise. And yeah, sometimes she lets her imagination get the best of her, but she’s cautious enough and has proof to often back her up.

She knows she screwed up. Her penpal doesn’t believe her and isn’t scared to call her out.

Due to him bluntly uncovering her lies, some of the classmates see through the blinds she’d put on their eyes and get suspicious of her.

If you have mercy on them, make them come to Marinette and apologize.

...

Yeah, I’m not doing that.

The class sticks to Lila’s version of every story and they don’t believe Damian is THE Damian Wayne, even when a fricking limousine drives up to the school and a butler comes out of it.

---------

Random notes and ideas that don’t really have any sense or anything tbh, but I had them so there you go

About the attack, obviously the school has to inform the parents, right? But, if you're salty enough, you can, oh i don't know, make bustier and/or Damocles not inform them thus creating even more problems for them in the near future. (Yes, i hate bustier and damocles with passion, they’re enablers and Damocles is a gold digger tbh)

One day the french class is at a random restaurant (I’m honestly tempted to put them in Red Robin just for my own entertainment) when the Wayne brothers come in. They recognize them and Lila sees the opportunity, so she goes up to them.

Lila: Hiii Damiii!!!! [Yes, I know this is a real life conversation]

Damian, just done with her: Ugh, not you again.

Tim just kinda glances at her and decides she’s not worth his time.

Jason: What the fuck do you have on your head?

Dick: Oh, Damian, is this your crush or the penpal you despise so much?

Damian: The latter. And i do not have a crush

Lila, who totally stopped listening after she heard “crush”: That’s me!!!!

[Silence]

Damian: Marinette’s over there. Let’s go.

Lila: ;_;

Yeah, it sucks to be Lila.

[I thought I posted this a month ago. I didn’t. What the hell]

#Daminette #damian x marinette #damian wayne #maridami #mlb class salt #lila salt #penpal AU #damian hates lila with burning passion #honestly same #badass marinette #Marinette deserves better #lila ross

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