Tumgik
#girl. its literally canon? he literally talks about being 'big boned' as a way of saying he is fat bro
hexcia · 4 months
Text
friendly reminder that Sans Undertale is Fat and this is non-negotiable
131 notes · View notes
hansoulo · 3 years
Text
lead me to the promised land
part two of “Pillar of Salt”
Pairing: Boba Fett/Princess!Reader (she/her pronouns, no Y/N)
Warnings: NSFW - language, kissing, heavy petting, dom!Boba, gagging/choking, marks and bruises of the Spicy nature, hand and finger kink, allusions to canon-typical violence
Word Count: 2k
Gif Credit: (x) by @/tylowen
A/N: good day gremlins i am not very good at updating but i bring u some fun times as penance pls forgive me
༓ series masterlist ༓
Tumblr media
7:00 PM: T-MINUS 14 HOURS UNTIL IMPERIAL CONVOY DEPARTURE
You were used to being moved around by other people, poked and prodded and lifted up so that stays could be tied or burdensome headpieces be attached to your head. Shuffled around to smile and be proper, sedated by heavy skirts and perfume. It was a fact of life.
Your dress was unlaced by the mechanical hands of an attendant, the change happening quickly and without fond regard from any party. It was early evening now and the sky peeled itself into a burnt orange. If you closed your eyes, you could almost taste citrus.
“Careful, please,” you whispered with a slight wince as the woman’s thin fingers brushed against your neck, both of your reflections cast warm in the mirror you now stood in front of. They were almost-bruises. Little ghost flower petals. Delicate and pretty, trailing behind your neck and not quite noticeable.
The woman only nodded. Servants weren’t ones to ask questions.
 ⫸ ———————————————————————————— ⫷
3:25 PM: T-MINUS 17 HOURS AND 35 MINUTES UNTIL IMPERIAL CONVOY DEPARTURE
The world seemed to tip on its axis, spinning too fast and not at all. It’d only been a minute, maybe two, but Boba’s words hung out to dry in the summer air and there was nothing else to do but wait for the actions to fulfill themselves. It shouldn’t have been as easy as it was to let him keep kissing you, but you only broke away to warn in a jolted, harsh whisper when his touch became too sharp. “Don’t leave any marks.”
“Are you commanding me?” Boba sneered, his voice slightly cruel as his gloved thumbs rubbed circles into your hip bones. You didn’t bother opening your eyes to look at him, letting his mouth skid over your jaw. Your answering yes or no wouldn’t make much of a difference. You had the feeling he would do what he liked either way. You had the feeling you’d let him.
It was strange, too fast. Too fast because really, what did you know about Boba? Were you even on first name terms? He’d never called you your name, and you’d never called him his. You’d only known of him for a few weeks. Had truly talked to him for even less than that. Maybe you should stay a capitalized Princess and he should be “Fett.” For the sake of clinicality.
Letting him lift you up and onto his lap was most definitely not clinical. “That depends,” you croaked out after a moment, finally looking at his face in your half-stupor. He’d sat you up to face him and you’d gone with, pliable and keening. Being champagne drunk felt like this; like his eyes coal-black and the way he seemed to take up everything in your mind until there was no room for reason.  You traced over the scar on his forehead with a light mouth, knees bowed to nestle closer and every muscle in your body flexing, tensed as if dripped over with sunshine. “Are you going to listen?”
The smile of a predator was the only answer he gave you.
⫸ ————————————⫷
3:30 PM: T-MINUS 17 HOURS AND 30 MINUTES UNTIL IMPERIAL CONVOY DEPARTURE
Men were vile. They had clammy hands that wandered to your thighs at banquet dinners, slimy mouths when they pressed their lips to your hand in greeting. They were all insufferable and you promised never to go near one as long as you could help it. But promises were a boring thing to keep sometimes. They were much more fun to break.
Boba spoke but it was swallowed in your interlocking mouths, hungry and escalating desperate. You were still sitting with—on?—him, too cowardly to do anything more than kiss and let yourself be felt by the strength of a man’s greed. He tasted like teeth and blood and pink flesh. That was the thing that no one had ever told you about kisses; about men like him. They tasted like broken skin. 
You were eating Boba whole. He was eating you piece by piece. 
You were just kissing. Had been just kissing for what seemed like ages but was actually only fifteen standard minutes. Fifteen standard minutes for your stays to be dragged loose, your lips to be bitten plush, and both sandals abandoned somewhere in the slow scramble. It wasn’t so much desperation as it was just a sheer curiosity goading your irrationality, but the end result was the same: a man squeezing the back of your neck, calling you lovely in the same breath he called you naive. 
“Take them off,” you almost demanded, pulling desperately at his gloves as the warm leather dragged against your fingernails. Learned manners were added in as an afterthought. “Please.”
His one-handed grip on your thigh tightened. It would bruise, likely. Raise questions, definitely. You would have to chalk it up to something else. A fall. A bad trip on a set of stairs. Anything besides what was happening now. The words rumbled against your chest and registered vaguely as a threat. “What was that?”
Huffy and impatient, you answered in a much more keening, undignified echo. “Please, pleasepleaseplease—”
Boba put his fingers in your mouth.
Boba put his fingers in your mouth.
Stuffed was the more apt word. You tried not to think about how he could only fit two of them inside without hurting you. It made you feel temperature-hot, physically burning until your cheeks and your insides twisted into smoldering ash because his fingers breached the alabaster edges of your teeth until they almost gagged you on your own tongue. Boba drew his hand back only when you sighed around it, sedated with fluttering eyes and no longer asking questions. His voice seemed to get deeper, raspier around the unplaceable accent from a place you’d never heard of and probably never would. “Good girl.”
The gloves stayed on. Why they did and why you couldn’t just get him to do what you wanted like everyone else you had no idea, but your frustration quickly ebbed into hazy, sparking pleasure. He called you good. You liked being good. 
Your hips stuttered when they caught on Boba’s trousers and suddenly you were giggling into the thick muscle of his shoulder, quiet and juvenile in your own disbelief. Everything about this was absurd and inappropriate, which formed the basis of your amusement. It was something to play with. Someone. Big and shiny in the most literal sense of the word. 
The hunter let out what could be construed as a laugh but sounded more akin to a growl and two large palms settled again on the soft rise of your hips. “Not here,” he repeated into your jaw, the words that were previously muffled so long ago now clearer. Not here. Which implied a theoretical somewhere other than here where you would possibly, hypothetically be doing more than- “We need to go.”
You should go. You should be pushing him off of you and running and screaming or something equally inflammatory because this was… because his...
“No,” you protested weakly with a slow shake of your head. Your hands curled around his pauldrons and rested there, limp and slightly shaking. “No, they- they didn’t actually need me for anything. My father just had to—oh Maker-” his cuisse plate pressed up hard between the warm softness of your thighs. “—had to send someone out to search for me—” you rutted against his leg once, twice before the arms around your waist tightened again and inhibited any further attempts at movement. You recovered from the loss of friction quickly, instead letting yourself sag into his solid chest as one set of fingertips dragged along your spine. “—’s just a poor look for him not to,” you finished flippantly, barely audible from where your face settled smushed against the creep of stubble on his cheek. “Bad press.”
“I’ve still got places to be, princess. Even if you don’t.”
“Oh I’m terribly sorry,” you tried replying sarcastically as his mouth flattened against the thin skin of your neck. His lips were soft, but they pressed against you like anything but. You tried rolling your hips again but were thwarted. “Am I in the way of a prior engagement?”
“Something like that.”
“Well then,” you flattened your palms against his chest plate and broke away from the seal of his touch. It wasn’t fair. You couldn’t breathe right and looked like you’d been dragged through a sarlacc pit, but he was just sitting there. Watching you. His eyes were hungry though. “Why let me keep you?”  The words were shot through with airy exhales as you were lifted up off the smooth stone. “I was under the impression that you hated me,” you continued into Boba’s neck with hands curled around the dark curls at its nape.
You did think that, before… this. Now you didn’t know what to believe, what his intentions were. Most likely they were the same as yours. Nothing good.
Whatever either of your motivations were, they would have to be paused now. For his mysterious, vague “engagement” and probably for the betterment of your health, because you were certain if you stayed here with him, shielded away from prying eyes and marching men, your heart would burst right out of your chest and through your ears. 
Your legs wobbled slightly when he set you standing on the ground, Boba’s helmet still laying on the fountain’s edge, and you handed it to him with a reverence that belayed the previous minute’s informality. When it was restored to his head you found yourself mourning the loss of his face. You’d been spoiled this last hour. You didn’t like not seeing it anymore.
“I don’t.” was his short reply. What a wordsmith. 
“Aren’t you still my escort?” you huffed, trying to catch your breath. Your chest rose and fell in panted inhales. Wiping haphazardly at your mouth, you leaned over the fountain’s reflection and attempted to compose yourself. The circlet usually pinned neatly to your head lay crooked and loose, glimmering its delicate metals in the daylight as you fussed with it this way and that. The pool of water currently acting as a mirror rippled too much to be of any real use. You pressed your palms to your flushed cheeks and mumbled. “My penitentiary guard, more like.”
Boba turned you around to face him with his hands on your shoulders and you imagined his eyes to still be edged in charcoal embers. The last smudge of lipstick on your chin was rubbed away by a broad thumb and you watched, curious to his intentions and surprised at his actions, when he reached up to right your crown.
“Let’s go, princess.”
You didn’t argue. You’d been sated from rebellion for the time being.
 ⫸ ————————————⫷
4:10 PM: T-MINUS 15 HOURS AND 50 MINUTES UNTIL IMPERIAL CONVOY DEPARTURE
The mercenary stood by the side entrance watching you. 
“You look a mess!” your mother admonished, harried with the exertion of the day’s events that you somehow managed not to be privy to. Apparently there was to be a dinner with the guests leaving the next morning, and apparently you specifically were asked to be present. Both would be dull pieces of information on the best of days but now, after the events that had just transpired, they were positively brain-numbing. 
The queen consort motioned for you to turn around and you complied with a slow spin as your being was examined for minor casualties. Once the woman assured herself of your being alive and unharmed, barely registering the tall figure that stood mere yards away, she allowed herself more frantic inquiries as she shuffled you down the hallway. “What were you doing out there?”
“Oh nothing,” you answered vaguely, eyes trailing as far back towards the doors as they could go without actually turning your head. There was a flash of green armor. “I just wanted to take a walk, is all.” You turned to her and smiled your best attempt at a brilliant, royal-white assurance. “Clear my head.”
315 notes · View notes
5ummit · 3 years
Text
I swear I’ll shut up about this eventually but I’m still just livid about the way Marvel handled Loki’s genderfluidity (and his shapeshifting in general).
Obviously Sylvie being the only female-presenting variant we ever get to see (and the other Loki’s surprise about the existence of a lady variant) is a Big Problem when it comes to Loki’s genderfluid identity, but it’s already been talked about to death by myself and many others so I’ll skim past that for now because I have different bone to pick. Something else that's really irritated me from the beginning is the way Sylvie looks, by which I mean she looks nothing like our Loki in the slightest. Literally everything about her – height, build, face shape, hair color, expressions – is different. But why? That’s certainly not how genderfluidity works. A genderfluid individual will still generally look like the same person regardless of how they choose to identify at any given moment. So what’s the deal?
I've been trying to reserve my judgment about this because I kept expecting and hoping that by the end we would get some twist where it would be revealed Sylvie wasn’t a Loki all along. Because it’s literally the only thing that would make sense. I mean just look at how lady Loki is usually portrayed in the comics (excluding when he took over Sif’s body because that’s an entirely different thing):
Tumblr media Tumblr media
When you compare these versions to their MCU counterparts it’s almost funny how comically different Hiddleston and Di Martino are. How, if you didn’t already know, you would never be able to guess they’re supposed to be the same character.
Tumblr media
While this choice isn’t inherently bad on it’s own – he’s a magic user and in theory can look however he wants – we can’t look at it on its own because it’s part of a disgustingly pervasive pattern in media. The best example of this is the way boy and girl characters are designed entirely different in most mainstream animation. The boy is almost always bigger with more angler lines and is allowed to look more unconventional, whereas the girl is petite and curvy and pretty – always pretty. They even do it with animals for godsake, even if it doesn’t biologically make sense! For example, just like the Lokis, the Night Furies from HTTYD should theoretically look very similar, yet they made the girl dragon of the same species (yes, they are the same species because they were able to canonically reproduce) smaller, smoother, softer, sparkly, and white.
Tumblr media
Marvel could’ve made any number of casting choices for Sylvie. I’m not saying they had to find an actress who looked exactly like Hiddleston. I would’ve been fine with someone with the same general height and build (and black hair of course). Instead they deliberately chose to take this canonically genderfluid character – who should by all accounts look almost exactly the same when identifying as a woman – and reenforce gross gender stereotypes. Why? Because how will people know she’s a girl if she doesn’t look petite and pretty???
Not only does this choice reenforce the outdated gender binary, it’s also just bad genderfluid representation in general. It makes it seem like choosing to present as a one gender or another makes someone an entirely different person. Like gender is a costume you put on rather than something flexible and fluid and inherent to your being.
Now you may be asking yourself “How will people know she’s a Loki if she doesn’t look anything like him?” Apparently the answer is: Not Important!
As with the other Loki variants in The Void, I could almost excuse this choice if it had been addressed in the show. If Loki had asked Sylvie at some point why she looked so different and she replied that she deliberately changed her form so that she wouldn’t be reminded of the life she was supposed to have, it would still be a questionable casting choice, but at least it would have some in-world justification. But no, it was never brought up because either (1) the writers think this exactly how genderfluidity works or (2) having a love interest be anything but petite and pretty is unfathomable. I’m going with #2.
Of course the other obvious reason she looks nothing like Loki is that they wanted to have their selfcest cake and eat it too. We can’t have her looking too much like a Loki (or god forbid an actual man) because that would be ~icky~.
61 notes · View notes
fandomscombine · 4 years
Text
The Hargreeves Kerfuffle Part 2: Family Reunion
The Hargreeves Kerfuffle Part 2: Family Reunion
The Hargreeves siblings x Hargreeves!Reader (Familial Relationship)
BG: The Reader is Number Eight. It follows how you fit into the structure of Season 1 and the family dynamic of the siblings.
This part follows the collapse of The Umbrella Academy during their youth and having the family back together after years apart for the very first time.
I have mashed up the information and some events from both the comics and the tv series. So a heads up for readers who haven’t read the comics, it was hinted in S2 but in the very beginning of the comics, it’s canon that Reginald is indeed an Alien.
The series will consist of 10 parts. Where the reader would have a focused interaction with each sibling. (Eg. After this part, it would be Luther x Reader, then Diego x Reader and so on! –Yes Ben is included)
WC: 4786 (never had I written so much for one part before!)
Contains: Angst. Death- Reginald and Ben (so not exactly a spoiler, but while writing Ben’s scene had my eyes water a bit.) Crap childhood and the Hargreeves being a mess.
A/N: You guys are literally the best! Reading your replies and comments about how much you enjoyed part 1 and are looking forward to the rest of the series, really warms my heart!
>>GENERAL MASTERLIST<<
>>THE HARGREEVES KERFUFFLE SERIES MASTERLIST<<
READ: [PART 1]  [PART 3]  [PART 4]
>>JOIN MY WRITING CHALLENGE!<<
Tumblr media
~
March 21, 2019.  
Never had you thought that you would be back here, looking up the gates of The Umbrella Academy, 13 years later.
There was and still is so much pain associated with this building, this entity, this identity of The Umbrella Academy. That you hadn’t seen it coming- well not exactly completely blind to it. Sir Reginald Hargreeves’ upbringing of children-your siblings, your childhood- had always been shit but you had never come close to imaging it to be as emotionally and mentally damaging as it did.
Children at aged 7 finding out they had powers was great. To a kid, it was a dream come true to be a real-life superhero. It all started out as fun and games but soon, training started to be competitions to outshine your siblings-your competitors whist being told to work together at the same time. It was quite a hard concept to grasp as a young kid, but in order to get any attention and praise from a distant father, a kid would do anything.
By the age of 9, the superhero team of ‘The Umbrella Academy’ was officially announced to the world. The group consisted of the 7 Hargreeves children, publicly known as: Spaceboy, The Kraken, The Rumor, The Séance, The Boy, The Horror, and Foresight.
An 8th child with seemingly no superpower, had been secretly tucked away, hidden from the world and too, distanced away from her own siblings. It was though Vanya Hargreeves didn’t exist.
You did try your best to spend time with Vanya and keep the Sunday sister bonding time with her, but with all your training and missions, combined with all her violin lessons and some other private lessons she often go on with in long periods of time - though she wouldn’t mention what they were- there was absolutely no time to be in each other’s presence, so soon you along with the rest of your siblings slip away from Vanya.
At age 10 was a big year for the Hargreeves siblings, they had kind of successfully protected the city of Paris from the chaos of the Eiffel Tower being a spaceship- yes it did flew away but at least the people were saved- The mission became world wide news and soon every move they made caught the public’s eye. With this led to more intense training and additional etiquette workshops to better the group’s public image.
Reginald being a helicopter parent took a toll on the children, who had coped in their own ways. Luther taking the role of ‘leader’ to heart, Diego with his never ending hero complex, Allison using her power to get whatever she wanted, Klaus fell into the world of drugs and alcohol, Five-the rebel who thinks he’s smarter than everyone even dad, Ben into the world of video games, Vanya became ever more quiet and more to herself, and you-a yes person to dad who calls you his most valuable asset that has ever crossed his path, never wanting to let him down.
Things really started to get out of hand at the ripe old age of 13. Breakfast had been a mess, Five had a massive argument with dad and stormed out of the house. You ran after him, caught his coat just as he passed the gate- the very gate you are standing in front of now.
‘FIVE! WAIT!’
‘WHAT?’ He turned, looking angrier as ever.
‘Please don’t leave.’ You place your hand on his shoulder- damn when did he become taller than you? ‘You both can talk this out. Rationalized things out’ You pleaded.
He shook your hand away. ‘Talk? REALLY Y/N? You think good old dad would dare listen to someone younger than him? TO HIS OWN CHILDREN?’ He snorted. ‘You are daft y/n. I thought you were smarter than this-‘ Five sighed. ‘But a guess you are too much of a daddy’s girl to see things clearly.’
‘I know you didn’t mean that’ You stammered, not letting the tears fall. ‘that’s just your anger talking.’
‘oh but I do mean it. Now if you’d excuse me, I have to get going to prove dad wrong.’
Five makes a step forward but you blocked his way
‘GET OUT OF THE WAY Y/N’ He pushes you. ‘I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOUR FACE ANYMORE.’
As you fell to the ground, you see him blip away.
That was the last time anyone had seen Number Five and his final words still haunts you to this day.
‘get out of the way y/n! i don’t want to see your face anymore.’
To make matters worst from having a sibling disappear and to never come back was to have another sibling lose his life.
The media was quick to publish the news. It was all the tabloid and news outlets seem to care about. The headline would vary but all in all still carry the same heart-breaking news. Be it from ‘The Horror dies in mission.’ , ‘The Umbrella Academy loses the life of another of its members.’ to ‘RIP to teen superhero Ben Hargreeves aka The Horror.’
Oh Ben, dear Ben. Why must he be taken away? You thought. Why?
The mission was meticulously planned and prepared for. You were sure to have extracted all the information on what was to go down and what the villains’ moves were from your vision.
You had memorized that every aspect of that dream- you had 2 weeks to prepare. Everyone was supposed to be safe, but why wasn’t Ben?
Why didn’t reality play out as to what you foresaw? You had never slipped up before. Why had the one time you did cost you the life of your beloved brother? Why?
While sobbing your eyes out onto Ben’s grave, a memory of what seemed so long ago came rushing back.
~
>>‘I’m sorry y/n.’ He said leaning on your door frame.
‘Ben!’ You exclaimed. ‘I’m so glad you’re back up and running!’
Ben was caught off guard. ‘You—You’re not mad at me?’
‘Why would I be mad at you?’ You questioned, genuinely confused at your brother’s words.
‘Cause, Cause I almost got you killed. I am a monster.’
You sat up straight at those words, your ribs hurt a bit at the sudden movement, but you didn’t care. Your brother was blaming himself for something he couldn’t have controlled.
‘NO BEN!’
Ben jumped from your sudden outburst.
You motioned for him to come closer.
‘Ben…’ looking into his eyes. ‘Ben you are no monster.’
‘But—’
‘uuh uh I’m not done’ You held his hand in yours. ‘You are no monster what happened then was an accident, nobody knew, heck nobody expected powers to just show up. It was beyond anyone’s control. It took us by surprise.’
His shoulders relaxed.
‘It wasn’t your fault. I don’t blame you for what happened.’
He gave you a bone crushing hug. ‘Thank you y/n. You don’t know how guilty I was feeling.’ Voice muffled by your shoulder, which is now wet with his tears. ‘I kept thinking about the pain I caused you and I wasn’t allowed to leave my room even when I begged dad to see you and say sorry. y/n’
‘Shhh shhh’ Rubbing his back. ‘It’s alright Ben. What’s important is that we’re all here now. Alive, Safe and sound.’. <<
~
‘I’m sorry Ben…’ You choked out.
‘I’m so sorry Benny…’ Wiping his gravestone of your tears. ‘I—I got you killed. I am a monster. I am THE monster.’ You hiccupped. ‘It is MY job to keep everyone same, to do the reconnaissance, to ensure that everyone in the frontline is safe. It is my power to foresee what could go wrong, to avoid disastrous mistakes. And….and I failed, Ben. I failed. I failed you, dad, The Umbrella Academy.’
‘I miss you Ben so much…’ You lie down with an arm across the lawn. Picturing that is was him you’re hugging, that he is really there.’ more than your annoyingly sweet ass could ever believe. I wish you were here Ben, safe and sound. And if you could hear me Ben, I wish you could forgive me.’
Your eyes slowly fall shut from the emotional guilt you’re feeling but a warm breeze passes through like a warm embrace lightening the heavy burden within.
A soft whisper of reassurance and familiar words brings you to peaceful rest.
‘I forgive you y/n. It wasn’t your fault. I don’t blame you for what happened.’
You stirred from your sleep as you felt yourself lifted from the ground.
‘Careful Diego! You might wake her up.’ You hear Klaus say.
All this trauma, stress and was just too much to handle by minors and as quickly as all your powers came, the same goes for the people who left.
Klaus was the first to leave the academy at age 16, who choose to be self-checked at a rehab centre, stating that that was a way healthier environment then this shithole that was ‘home’.  Who could blame him? Especially when you yourself were planning to leave.
As much as you wanted to get up and leave in the dead of night, you can’t. You don’t have the heart to leave your remaining siblings behind. No, not in this environment. If you were to leave, you wanted them to go with you, to at least know they would have a good life ahead.
Under Reginald’s watchful eye, it would take time to sort the plan out, but it would be worth it.
And you know just the person to talk to.
‘Heyya Diego.’
‘You’re up to something y/n/n and I don’t want to be in any part of it.’ He says without glancing your way. ‘Not after the pineapple incident.’ Diego’s eyes finally landing on you.
Rolling your eyes, you chuckled. ‘Oh come on Diegs! That was years ago! It was just a childish prank—’
Diego gives you the finger.
‘-Oi! It is not MY fault what Luther did to you; besides you were supposed to take the EAST stairwell, NOT the West.’ You say matter of factly, shaking your head. ‘Ughh no, we are getting out of topic. Diego, I need your help and you have to promise not to tell anyone-’
‘You’re devising a getaway plan, aren’t you?’
Your brows scrunched together. ‘How’d you—’
‘I’m not blind y/n, I recognised the look of someone who too is planning to escape.’
You raise a brow. ‘Too?’
‘Yes, Too.’ Diego edges closer to you. ‘Now, why don’t we save the trouble of potentially ruining each other’s individual schemes and join forces. Team up. More brainpower. And whatnot. Deal?’ Offering his pinky out.
You ignored the outstretched gesture. ‘What happened to being a lone wolf huh?  I thought that was your thing now?’ You countered.
‘Like a said y/n, the more brainpower, the higher the success.’ He explained. ‘Say, we do manage to get out or perhaps just leave, like Klaus. Where would we go? Where would you? Hmm?’
‘I… I…’ You honestly don’t know.
‘Exactly. That’s why we team up and once we’re out of here. We stick together for a while till we get back on our feet and figure out what we want then go our separate ways.’
You nod, digesting his words. It seems like a solid plan with ample flexibility before deciding on what to do with your life after. But….
‘Okay…..’
‘Okay!’
‘…On one condition. It would not only you and me. We’ll try to get to convince the others to come along too.’
‘What?! y/n no, that’s too many people on the plan-‘
‘More brainpower, higher the success. Your words Diego. Not mine.’ You retaliated. ‘Besides, we can’t just leave everyone here. It’s miserable here. They’re family Diego.’
‘Fine we’ll tell Luther and Allison.’
‘Everyone, Diego.’ You stared him down. ‘And that includes Vanya. No buts.’
‘Ugh.Fine.’ He points a finger towards your face. ‘We tell Luther, Allison AND Vanya. But I swear y/n if anyone of them rats us out or backs out of the plan. We leave them behind. No pity if they choose to stay in this shithole of a house. They are old enough to make their own decision and to face the consequences.’ He leans back to the bed’s headboard. ‘That’s my final offer. Deal?’
‘Deal.’ You interlock your fingers, sealing the pinky promise.
It was easy to get Vanya on board, as she was the child that received the crappiest treatment from dad. Allison was hesitant at first but after convincing her the real world had so much more to give compared to that of the imaginary perfect bubble she created for herself here in the academy with the use of her power, she was on board.
Luther that ever loyal ‘leader’ of the academy would never dare cross dad, the idea wouldn’t have even crossed his mind. Diego had failed to make him see reason and so have you. Luther only came around to be a part of the escape because Allison had agreed to it.
It took almost 6 months. The time has come. You all had saved up enough money to rent a loft apartment downtown and pooled enough to last at least 3 months on your own.
At 1:00 am.  All the remaining 5 Hargreeves are to ready with their backpacks to sneak out in groups, boys and girls, and meet at the rendezvous point, Giddy’s Doughnuts. There, a van would be available for them to drive to the apartment.
The boys were to go first, as to let Diego deactivate the security features of the house while Luther stands guard.
It was only supposed to take 15 minutes tops, it was 20 minutes past now. Something was wrong.
Deciding as a team to check up on the boys, you, Allison and Vanya head down to the foyer.
Upon arrival, you see Luther with his hands covering Diego’s face, Diego who seem limp as a log.
‘Luther what’s going on?’ Allison’s voice rang out beside you.
‘I’m sorry….’ He looks down unto the unconscious Diego in his arms. ‘I just… I just couldn’t.’
‘Number Eight! How could you! How could all of you! Three! Seven!’
The room seemed to turn colder by the sound of the voice. You turn and see Sir Reginald Hargreeves.
‘Dad…’
‘YOU ARE ALL A DISGRACE.’ Reginald spitted.
‘But dad!’ Luther pleaded. ‘I was the one who informed you about their plan!’
‘ENOUGH! NO MORE OF THIS FOOLISHNESS, BACK TO BED---’
‘That’s right NO MORE dad!’ Shouted Allison. She glances at dad then at Luther. A frown etched her face as she commanded. ‘I heard a rumor that you couldn’t move your legs.’
The effect was immediate. The lower half of Reginald and Luther stayed still as a rock while they tried their best to break free. But alas, Allison had the upper hand. ‘I heard a rumor you let us go freely.’ At once, both men calmed down.
And to add insult to injury. Allison focused on Reginald and rumoured ‘And you would leave Diego Hargreeves, Klaus Hargreeves, Vanya Hargreeves, Y/n Hargreeves and Allison Hargreeves alone.’
Luther’s betrayal felt like a stab in the back.
Moving on and creating a new life from the ground up for oneself was hard but having your siblings with you had definitely made it easier.
It took a while to get the hang of things, being 4 young adults with nothing. You missed Mom and Pogo, but you knew that they, like Luther would stick with Dad.
Vanya was the first to take up stack, she provided the finance to pay rent and groceries with the salary she would get from her violin performances at the local theatre. Soon Allison would also chip in from the money she received from her acting gigs.
Diego showed interest into joining the police academy while you wanted to get away from the lifestyle as much as possible, opted to move across the country and pursue tertiary education-because that was what normal 18-year-old do right? For once you want to be ordinary and what better way than experience what student life is all about.
Though there is one teensy detail that was hindering your application. You were home-schooled by your robot mom. There weren’t report cards or grades that any university would accept. Even if there were, you wouldn’t want to go back to that dreadful house.
 Both not wanting to lose your newfound passion, you and Diego had an enormous favour to ask.
‘NO not a chance!’ Allison crossed her arms.  ‘It’s unethical!’
‘Yes we know-‘ you replied.
‘But it’s the only way.’ Diego reasoned. ‘It’s not fair for y/n and I to not be able to follow our dreams and to finally FINALLY move on with our lives, Ally. While you and Vanya get to live out yours.’
You nodded along. ‘We ask you just this one thing and we’re out of your hair.’
Allison looked between you two as if to decided whether it would be worth it. ‘Fine, just this once.’  She sighs. ’And this doesn’t get out kapeesh?’ pointing her finger.
‘kapeesh.’
~
‘I’m gonna miss you so much!’ Vanya admitted.
You pulled both your sisters into a hug. ‘I’m miss you gals more!’
Allison wipes her tears away. ‘Don’t forget us okay? Remember we’re only a text away.’
‘Tell Diego that I’m gonna miss kicking his butt when he come back from his officer training, ye?’
~
Over the years you hadn’t lost touch with your family. It’s been a while since you’ve all together physically, but you do video chat every once and a while and you have a general tab on each of your siblings. Vanya is currently the 3rd chair violin at her orchestra, Diego had channelled his inner batman and believe to be a vigilante keeping the streets and public safe.
As for Klaus, Diego had told you that he hasn’t managed to keep off his ~happy place~ and had seen him in and out of nightclubs.
Allison….Well who wouldn’t know about what she’s up to. A-list celebrity with numerous critically acclaimed movies to her name, one half of Hollywood’s hottest couple and amazing role model for mothers. Ahh Claire that sweet angel, who says that you’re her favourite aunt, that smile of hers melts your heart.
The last you’ve seen of Luther is when his journey to the moon has been televised a couple of years ago. There’s been no news since.
 The rattling of the gate brings you back to the present.
‘AH yes, Miss.y/n. He has been expecting you.’
‘Pogo!’ You exclaimed, wrapping him in a hug.
‘So I’m not to late then? Where’s mom?’
‘Grace is with Sir Reginald, my dear.’ Pogo leads you up the stairs.
Looking around, everything is as pristine as usual. ‘I see that nothing’s change’ You noted.
‘Yes, well I was asked to keep it as it always was.’
He opens the door to Reginald’s quarters. There on the bed was dad, looking sickly pale but still alive unlike to what you had seen in your vision.
Beside him wiping away the sweat on his forehead was mom. ‘Oh, my dear y/n I’m glad you could join us.’ She says as if years hadn’t gone by without your presence.
You reach the foot of the bed. ‘Dad…’ you begin.
But Reginald cuts you off. ‘Number Eight. Glad to see that logical and curious side of yours overrides that irrational emotive side.’ His voice weak yet still holds its signature condescending tone. ‘It is your disposition to the voice of reason and mysteries of the unknown that led you here, despite your supposed hatred towards me-‘
‘There’s no grey area, I do hate you.’
He waved his hand to dismiss your interruption.
‘As I was saying, it is of this reason- your control over the impulsiveness that is apparent to all of your siblings who lack control- is why you are my favourite.’
You scoffed.
‘It is true, my dear y/n.’
‘Oh please. You only see me as a “valuable asset”. Remember?’
Reginald nods. ‘I do, but I believe the exact words were “You would do great things Number Eight. To see into the future is a valuable asset to have indeed”. Thus, implying that your ability is the asset not you.’
‘Sure, just rub it in don’t you.’ Rolling your eyes.
‘I hope that you do too remember that also in my own words that you were and still are “the cleverest of the bunch”.’
‘So why am I here, you’re clearly not dead.’ You looked at him again.  You’ve never seen your dad so fragile ever. ‘….yet. So there must be something to do with that. Perhaps find your killer?’
On the bedside table, you took note of the cup of tea and medication. Your brain is in super speed, running through ideas on what could have cause him to be so sickly.
‘It could be your meds…..’ You look up. ‘Mom who else has access to Dad’s medication?’
‘Just us dear, Pogo and I.’
‘Number Eight there is no killer. I am dying because of old age, it is quite normal for-‘
‘NO No but the mortality rate is 350 years for the species of—’
‘Ah!’ Reginald’s face showed of surprise which slowly turned into cunningest. ‘so, you know then’ He chuckled.
‘Yes.’
‘Since when?’ He asked genuinely curious.
‘When we first showed signs of powers, some of your notes were written in a language I did not recognised.’ You recalled. ‘So, I did some digging, it took a while but when I found about the secret safe under this very bed and what it contained. Everything became clearer.’
‘Very good. Y/n. Nobody knew about the safe expect myself.’ He looked over at Pogo. ‘Did you know of it?’
‘No, Sir.’ Pogo admitted. ‘Not until now.’
‘Very well indeed. You knew all this time, yet you didn’t say anything. Why?’
‘Because it didn’t matter.’ You shrugged. ‘The only thing that matter in this household was our powers.’
‘Did the others-‘
‘No, they didn’t know. I hadn’t told a soul. It is not my secret to share.’
‘And soon it will be yours.’
‘What?’
‘Number Eight, it is without a doubt my time here is limited. Perhaps as little as an hour.’
Never had you seen someone talk about their death like this. You shiver at the thought.
‘By the fact that you are here now and had seen a vision of me dead means that the block I had place on you to prevent you peering into events regarding me is failing. Failing as my health is.’
You want to be angry. How dare he supress your power. But you stand still as a rock by his confession. ‘why?’ A soft whisper was all you could muster. ‘why?’
‘Because I had to keep my real identity a secret. To prevent you from exposing me.’ He coughed. ‘But turns out, you hadn’t need to use your powers to know that, as what you’ve told me.’ He looked at you with watering eyes. ‘You found that all on your own, yet you did not disclose anything.’ He reached out for your hand to which you accept. ‘For which I am delighted that at least I can say that I have one child, a daughter to be proud of.’
A daughter to be proud of.
You would like to think that you are strong and independent. And those are true. But that small child that all that wanted was to experience a parent’s love and affection. That emotional support of that small child which you thought you had successfully tucked away came clawing its way back to the surface.
‘y/n’ You had almost missed it, wiping away your tears, you leaned closer.
‘Listen carefully….’ Your dad’s chest was barely moving. It was a struggle for him to get the following words out. ‘The end is near, get the others ……and save…..the…..tttiiiimmm’
You never head what came next. Sir Reginald Hargreeves is dead.
Under the setting sun, Reginald looked at peace.
~
A half moon shines brightly above the house. It had been 3 days and 7 Hours since it happened.
Exhaustion is starting to catch up with you but there is still so much to do.
News channels had broadcasted the breaking news of your father’s death.
You had personally called your siblings to deliver the news, they are to arrive tomorrow for the funeral at noon.  
Luther who had been expecting to relay dad his daily report status on the space radio, cussed at you in anger-those were the first words you heard in 12 years- calmed down and said that he will be there in 3 days, in time for the funeral.
‘Sweetie, I brought you some tea.’
‘Thanks mom.’ You take a sip. ‘Hey mom did you think you’re gonna be alright now that you know…. That dad is gone?’
She runs her fingers to your hair. ‘I’m gonna be fine dear, I am stronger than you know.’
You smile at her. You just can’t help but to think what’s gonna happen to her now that your dad is gone. Pushing that thought away-like she said, I am stronger than you know.
 ‘Now, why don’t we get you to bed.’ She cuts you off before you can say a word. ‘Uh uh. You have done so much already. You need rest especially with the funeral in 9 hours. Pogo and I can handle the remaining task.’
‘Thanks again mom.’
She tucks you into bed. ‘Good night y/n/n. Sweet Dreams.’ She kisses the top of your head. ‘I love you.’
‘I love you too mom.’ As she leaves your room, you realised that you didn’t want to be alone. ‘Mom…’ You called out, almost childlike.
‘Yes dear.’ Grace makes her way back in.
‘Well you stay with me? Sing to me until I fall asleep?’
‘Ofcourse dear.’ She smiles, pulling up a chair beside your bed.
The lull of your mother’s voice sends you to sleep with the memories of the childhood before power. When everything was simple. When there was love in this household.
~
You awoke to sounds of screams and flashes of blue light. You hurry to your window, it shows the courtyard, a ball of blue chaos small black figures.
You pull on your jacket and ran downstairs, the clock in the foyer shows 11:37am. Crap you overslept! But that means…..that the figures you saw were your siblings. There are early….that’s new.
You arrived in the courtyard just as you see Klaus throws a fire extinguisher at the blue light.
‘What are you doing?!’ Shouted Luther.
‘What is that gonna do?’ Allison questioned.
‘I don’t know!!’ Klaus turned around ‘Do you have a better idea?—Oh hey y/n! Nice to see you!’ He ran over and gave you a tight hug. ‘What a family reunion ehh?’
Before you could reply, the ball of blue gave out a crackle of electricity.
‘Everyone get behind me!’ Luther pushes in front of everyone.
‘Yeah! Get behind us.’ Diego chimed in, pushing Vanya closer to you.
Vanya ignores Diego, trying to get a better look herself. ‘It looks like something is coming through!’
The ball of light exploded, the sudden burst of energy was blinding that you had to cover your eyes.
Then nothing, total darkness.
THUD. You heard Vanya scream.
‘Argh!’
The blue chaos had expelled something….someone.
Luther was the first to speak. ‘Who’s there?’
‘Show yourself!’ said Diego.
As a collective group, you walked towards the mystery person.
Your eyes go wide with shock. No it can’t be, it’s impossible. You must be seeing things.
‘Does anyone else see little Number Five, or is that just me?’ wondered Klaus.
Klaus looked around and saw that everyone showed that same face of disbelief. Pleased to know that it wasn’t the drugs, he snickered. ‘Now THIS! THIS IS WHAT I CALL A FAMILY REUNION.’
Little Five who didn’t seem to have aged a day since you last saw him,
It’s been years but seeing him looking like he did back when you last saw him, you recall the last words he had shouted at you.
‘get out of the way y/n! i don’t want to see your face anymore.’
Five looks down at himself drowned in tattered oversize clothes, wining. ‘SHIT!’
Something is wrong, something is very wrong and you know it.
No way was this all a coincidence for your father to warn you about some impending doom and have Five to reappear 17 years later. It must be related somehow…What’s next you thought……For Ben to come back to life too?
END OF PART 2
READ: [PART 1]  [PART 3]  [PART 4]
Taglist [All]: @gruffle1
Taglist [TUA]:@herecomesthesun1969 @alabaster1223 @ultraviolet-m @winterierwriter @lordofthunderthr @grapesauze @xbarrjallenx @white-wolf-buckaroo @yoheyyosup @infinitystones2018 @94seun @buckynatlarry @thegirlwholikestomanythings @just-some-stars @97yrm @2cuteforyourlies @e-bendy @criminallyhamilton @aqarath @change-the-world-someday @sambucky8 @spankin-soda @big-galaxy-chaos @cosmichellfire
Feel free to tell me to you want to be tagged for the series or for all/any other of my fics.
Would love to hear your opinion on the series so far too!
231 notes · View notes
clearsky · 3 years
Text
My Top Comfort Characters/Kins and My Main HCs For Them
(Note, not all my kins/comfort characters are on here, just the ones I have more than 5 hcs for)
CW: Korekiyo Shinguji (DRV3), Himiko Yumeno (DRV3), Shinsou Hitoshi (BNHA), Kyoko Kirigiri (THH), Tsuyu Asui (BNHA), Entrapta (Spop), Ibuki Mioda (SDR2), Celestia Ludenberg (THH), Funtime Foxy (FNAF), Peril (WOF)
Korekiyo Shinguji (DRV3)
Nonbinary
He/They pronouns
Autistic
Chains and loose accessories are for stimming
Likes the feeling of silk and cotton
Can't stand the feeling of anything rough or bumpy
He likes collecting small trinkets and the bones of small mammals
Can't stand anything salty. He'll eat it but he certainly won't enjoy it
Dating Rantaro
Can flirt, but only if he doesn't try
Petnames are a hell yea
Gets sunburnt really easily
Group dates with Celesnaegiri and Ikuzono
Can't cook for s h i t
Had a scene kid phase in middle school
Went to the same middle school as Celeste and Maki
Knew them when Celeste went through her "I'm not like other girls" phase and Maki was a Band Kid™
Himiko Yumeno (DRV3)
Female
She/Her pronouns
Lesbian
Can force herself to fall asleep within seconds regardless of where she is
100% forces herself to fall asleep when she doesn't wanna listen/talk to someone
Himiko/Angie/Tenko relationship. I'm calling them the Traffic Light Trio
She likes taking naps in the forest
She prefers enclosed/tight spaces more than open ones
Has several hundred stress balls and squishies laying around
She overheats easy
Shinsou Hitoshi (BNHA)
Questioning his gender, but goes by any pronouns
Knows he's Asexual, at least
Has no clue what his romantic orientation is though
The kind of person to carry treats in his pocket just in case he runs into a cat
Will stop to pet literally every cat he comes across
Great at reading people
Doesn't talk unless it's 100% needed
Hangs with Tokoyami, Jirou, and Denki most often
Aizawa has 100% unofficially adopted him
Fosters kittens
Not a big fan of physical touch
He is 100% in the bakusquad. Anyone who says he's in the Dekusquad is a c o w a r d
He and Tsuyu vibe
Knows a bunch of random facts
Dark humour? Dark humour
*skates backwards into his therapist's room slowly sipping from an absurdly huge cup of coffee* Candice you're not gonna BELIEVE the shit I just went through
In case I forgot to mention it, he skates
Kyoko Kirigiri (THH)
Mtf
She/Her
Bi with female preference
Burns go up to her shoulders/collarbone/chest
Prefers to just listen as opposed to saying anything
Knows a ton of random trivia about everyone else in her class
She keeps a notebook she fills with all the trivia
Doesn't celebrate her birthday. She just doesn't see the point of it
Doesn't hate sugar/sweets, but if given the choice she would choose literally everything else
Cuts her own hair
A cat person
Permanent dark circles
T-Tall 😳
Like,,, 6'1 at LEAST
Only person taller than her is Yasuhiro (6'3)
Canon no longer exist
Ahahaha healthy life habits? What are those?
Can't handle horror games
She's the kind of person you'd go to if you needed to rant but didn't want any advice
Polyamourous yo
Celeste/Kyoko/Makoto
She's a dom yall are just scared to admit it
Tsuyu Asui (BNHA)
They go by They/Them
Lesbian
They and Ochaco are dating
They like to hang with Shinsou
Which mainly just means the two sitting in one of their dorms in near total silence doing whatever
Can speak English and French as well as Japanese
Learned English from cartoons
Picked up French bc they thought it'd be fun
Prefers to stay neutral in the whole Bakusquad / Dekusquad thing
They're invited to all outings/events by/for both squads
They like puns
They're a dumbass but willingly, and for fun
Like "someone says they like dark humour and they'll turn off the lights before telling a joke" kind dumbass for fun
Great at poker
Likes Disney Movies
Very touchy once you get close enough
Not in a sexual way, just likes physical contact
Especially fond of piggyback rides and cuddles
Extreme fear of needles
Entrapta (She-Ra)
She/Her or It/Its
Doesn't bother trying to figure out whether she's cis, trans, nonbinary, or what
Was AMAB though
Short as fuck (4'7)
Strong as fuck though
Cuddle game strong
Physical touch is a fuck yes
Cuddles
Piggyback rides
Hugs
Anything where she's touching someone is wonderful in her book
As long as she's the one that initiates it
Anyone else touching her without her permission makes her freak
Prefers being high up
Makes it harder for anyone to sneak up on her
An ace at video games
When it comes to sexuality she just says she's Questioning
Ibuki Mioda (SDR2)
Any pronouns + Pup/Pupself + It/Its
No idea what their gender is otherwise
Biromantic Asexual
Just likes sexual jokes
Gets distracted easily
Has severe hearing problems
She's plays her instruments as loud as possible, with the amp right next to her, without ANY ear protection
It's caused some damage
She talks so loud bc she has no idea how loud is considered acceptable
Wears hearings aids most of the time
Several piercings and tattoos
Likes hearing things jingle
She has a bracelet with a few bells hanging from it
She'll shake it whenever she's bored
LOVES hair accessories
Ribbons are a particular favourite
Occasionally she'll hang little charms from her hair "horns"
The kind of person who never takes any pills/medicine bc she keeps forgetting she has to
Frequently uses emojis
Skates everywhere but she isn't very good at it
She keeps crashing into everything
Has broken every bone in her body at least 3 times
Most of which was bc she keeps trying to kick in doors and skating down the stairs
Celestia Ludenberg (THH)
Nonbinary
Any pronouns, mainly goes by She/They
Bi, 70:30
Collects mini hand sanitizers and can tabs
Has single handedly gotten Mario Kart, Mario Party, Monopoly, Uno, and Clue banned a grand total of 17 times (and counting)
The kind of person to purposefully target someone regardless of what game was being played
Favourite victim is Byakuya (bc he gets so upset about it and she finds that hilarious)
Mains Waluigi
Celeste/Kyoko/Makoto
Has several banned Twitter accounts bc whenever she's bored she'll start discourse on purpose
Hangs with Korekiyo, Ibuki, Byakuya, Yasuhiro, and Leon most often
It's a weird friend group but everyone's sorta gotten used to it
She and Byakuya gamble together occasionally
She tries to avoid it bc he'll willingly blow his entire fortune in an attempt to beat her
Autustic
Can't stand the feeling of water
Mainly bc she can't swim for shit
Horror movies? Hates them
Gets flustered super easily
Taka is her twin brother
Kotoko, Kokichi, and Gundham are their half siblings (Same father)
Peko and Toko are their cousins
She sucks ass at go fish
Fuck canon she's 4'11 now
C h u b b y
Freckles
Once she gets comfortable enough with herself she dyes her hair in the peekaboo style
Either black and red or black and blonde
Haven't decided yet
I'll be doing Celesnaegiri hcs as a seperate post but I just feel it's important for you to know that she expresses her affection verbally and is a very touchy person
Went to middle school with Maki and Korekiyo
Has horrible eyesight
She wears contacts most of the time but she always puts off buying more
After the 5th or so time she ended up blindly stumbling around a week after her contacts ran out Kyoko convinced her to buy glasses as well
Religious accessories yo
Like chokers and dangly earrings with crosses and pentagrams and shit
Likes wearing wacky earrings
Can run and do all sorts of tricks in heels
She and Mukuro are exes yo
Keeps her hair short so it's easier to manage
Hair never gets longer than her shoulders if she can help it
She seems like the kind of person who'd keep her bangs grown past her eyes regardless of how frustrating or inconvenient it is
She's a sub yall just don't wanna admit it
Funtime Foxy (FNAF)
I'm going on the record to say this
Funtime Foxy is genderfluid and that is that
Goes by Funtime
Any pronouns, They/Them most commonly
Plays music (keyboard and guitar mainly)
They and Funtime Freddy (Freds) mainly play with the kids
Freds mainly tells stories with Bonbon while Funtime more so plays one-on-one
Has nicknames for everyone
Circus Baby - Ringleader
Ballora - Bells
Funtime Freddy - Partner
Bon Bon - Bun
Peril (WOF)
I like both Nonbinary She/They Peril and Mtf She/Her Peril
They're both such good concepts
She's a lesbian, Harold
She only had a crush on Clay bc he was pretty much everything she was supposed to like in a guy
Gimme a moment while I force all my mental disorders onto this poor child
Autistic, Anxiety (Social anxiety, mainly, but she has most types), Adhd, PTSD
I'd like to reiterate yet again that She's a lesbian
Sunny and Glory were her gay awakening
Peril in Book 1: Damn, Sunny and Glory sure are pretty. Anyone would be lucky to date them. Clay would probably go for them over me. He would be stupid if he didn't. I myself would willingly date them over someone like me. They're just so pretty :(
Peril waking up in a cold sweat in the middle of arc 2: WAIT-
Rarepair alert but Peril/Sora
Peril meeting Sora: "Hmmm She's attractive. I would love to date her. Too bad I'm straight and in love with her brother lmao :P"
Peril, a mere month later, waiting for Ruby to leave Jade Mountain, pacing in her cave, running face first into a wall: WAIT-
I remember reading this one amazing story where Sora taught Peril to read/write and Peril found out she set off the bomb and comforted her/convinced her her run so that's canon now
Btw if anyone can remember what that story was called/what platform it was on and could tell me I'd appreciate it very much
I'd even be willing to draw a character of your's or make you an icon or something
I usually don't accept requests bc I get burnt out easy but this is a special case
She runs into Sora again sometime between the beginning of TOP and the end
I like to imagine she just goes wandering around
Anyway she confesses like a mere few minutes after running into her again bc Peril is just subtle like that
The actual confession takes 15 minutes and the entire time Sora is just sitting here like "👁👄👁 sure"
Bam Peril/Sora
Peril plans to keep it a secret for a little while longer but she spends 3 seconds around Clay and pretty much blurts it out
Clay, who wasn't even aware that Peril was a lesbian, is just "👁👄👁"
I wanna say Clay doesn't know what a lesbian is but in my canon Sunny is a lesbian so Starflight has already told him
Anyway he's super supportive
From that point Peril is sorta open about her sexuality?
Like, she gives Clay permission to tell the rest of the D.O.D bc she isn't about to risk being in front of them when they hear the news
(When Sunny starts actively seeking her out as a hang out buddy and Tsunami, Glory, and Starflight appear to tolerate her presence just a bit more afterwards she pretends she isn't confused by the change)
She's pink, white, and blue bc I said so
If you look at a certain angle in the right lighting her eyes, mouth, fire, and under her scales all look purple
But her fire is normally white and blue bc I said so
Also she pale as fuck bc in my canon their fire just sorta burns their colour away
You know how you leave something outside for too long and it gets sunbleached? Where it gets all washed out?
Like that but more extreme
By the age of 10-12 firescale dragons are just white with pale eyes
That's right not even the eyes are safe
Ram horns :P
I'm also fond of Peril/Sunny
Or maybe Peril/Sora/Sunny
But Peril/Sora is the main thing
On the topic of that bringing in my hc that if one sib in a sib group is fire resistant all of them are
She,,, She can change her scale colour
But only slightly and only if her emotions are strong enough
Bc I don't give a fuck about Darkstalker's scroll we were robbed of hybrid Peril
Unfortunately all of Peril's emotions are strong
Rainwing ruff along her head and neck
It's like a hood
It's mainly smoothed to her sides but when she's startled it flares out
RAINWING PUPILS
Y'all will know what those look like as soon as I get off my ass :P
She,,, She can mimic bird cries
Hates the summer
She has more than enough body heat already and the outside is just hot enough to add on and make her feel sick
She can somewhat control her heat but most of the time it's based on her emotions
It can go from standing-in-the-middle-of-a-burning-building-cant-see-your-nose-smoke-is-so-thick heat (Strong emotion) to Hey-thats-a-nice-cozy-campfire heat (Calm/"weak" emotion/Sleeping)
I'm just gonna make a different post with all my Peril hcs cuz there isnt enough room for all of them here
27 notes · View notes
Text
Chapter 1: The Crash
She was floating in space. Only it didn't seem like normal space, which she knew all about. It seemed to shine with different colors. She couldn't move much, it was almost as if she was forced into her current position. Voices of old filled her head. Voices she wanted to remember. Voices she never wants to forget. But at the same time, the voices brought back memories of a different time. A different time...
"Us kids should stick together, not stalk one another. I mean, Mafia Town can be a really dangerous place" "If you want it, we'll have to settle it in true Mafia style!" "You Moon Penguins are just gonna write some loud, noisy drivel!" "This last time piece is all for me, darling." "Your contract has expired, sleep now in the fire!" "And do it quickly pup."
Her face formed a smile, before tears started to fall. Wait... why was she...
"Don't leave us!" "Hey kiddo, let's make another contract!" "Don't you dare leave, lass!" "Let's watch our movie, darling!"
That's why... she couldn't have just stayed. She at least needed to try and get home. And her kind weren't keen on creatures from other planets... who knows what would have happened to them? But with the end result, did it even matter-
A large ringing brought her out of the space-like place, finding herself sitting on the soft surface of her bed. Glancing around as she stopped the ringing of the clock, everything was in place. Her relics on their podiums, toys she made based on her time on that planet on the shelves in her room. Most of her badges she bought from the strange badge guy on a pin board beside her bed. Her umbrella was next to her dresser with the mirror.
A glance out the nearby window showed the mostly green and blue planet. It reminded her a lot of the planet that she could now only visit in her dreams. Unlike that planet, there was little if any magic. Talking animal creatures were only heard of in movies. Ghosts were just tall tales. So similar, yet different at the same time...
She got up, yawning as she stretched and walked over to her closet. Opening it, she grabbed a purple blazer and yellow scarf. She paused, looking at them both slightly. The blazer was taller than she used to be, when she first found herself crashed on the planet...
She remembered checking the vault as she passed by, only one time piece was left. She knew that wouldn't be enough to make it home, and she didn't know if she would pass another planet she could survive on in between them. So she grabbed it, and braced for impact. The ship crashed on 'Earth' in the middle of the night, and looking back on it now, she was lucky no big place caught sight of her. She remembered bleeding, maybe having a broken or fractured bone with the sharp pain coming from the left side of her body. She found herself being too hurt to move on her own right away... it was possible that she would have died...
But then two people entered her vision as she picked herself up. Both wore hats like she did, one of them actually had two. Apparently the two hat man, Reginald, had seen the ship pass in front of his airship while it fell from the sky. The two were naturally confused on why she was there, and concerned if she was alright. She remembered them offering to take her to the airship's medbay, but she was more worried about her relics, which were not the only things she had of her time with her old friends. The one with his orange hair in a ponytail that hung over his shoulder, who called himself 'Right Hand Man', offered to do it for her. However, she took liberty and carried them all herself to the airship. Needless to say, the two were surprised by the child's strength.
She now called these two 'Dad' and 'Papa', and they called her their daughter.
She allowed herself to exit her thoughts as she pulled her brown shoes over her purple socks and pants, standing up and walking over to the door of her room. It was a new day.
"I was wondering when you were going to wake up." An energetic voice spoke as soon as she opened the door. She was met with a more-humanoid Topbot, with a face that smiled at her, and silver hair that helped make them seem more like a teenager. He wore a blue and orange jacket, with the faintest hint of a green shirt being seen, and dark dull indigo pants that ended in his metal shoes that were literally his feet.
A few years ago, Hat Girl had found herself more lonely. Her dads, while they made time for her, were often busy at work. Most of the younger kids aboard the airship didn't let her play too often, and the teenagers were often on training missions or just plain avoided her. In an attempt to give her someone to hang out with, Reginald took aside a random Topbot, redesign and reprogrammed it to act as a brother to Hat Girl. He spent so long and hard on it that it felt like part of his soul belong to the machine in the end. Which could possibly explained how Platinum wasn't just following an interactive script, but was fully self aware and alive. He did have a small panic attack at first due to the sudden self awareness, but soon after he was able to cause trouble with Hat Kid.
"You ready for today, brother of mine?" Hat Girl asked, a smile forming on her face.
"Uhh, yeah." He said, a smirk forming on his face as well.
"Good, we can get started on our prank plans after breakfast." She stated, passing him and walking down the hall, humming a slight tune as she glanced out at the seemingly-night sky.
"Aww, come on!" Platinum said, racing next to her quickly, rolling his bright orange eyes. "You always have to eat before we can have fun. I don't see what the big deal is."
"Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, Brother." She said, sticking her tongue out playfully. She never fully grew out of her childish phase. "I pity you sometimes, food is great and you're unable to experience it."
"Please. I got my Tanks and Family, that's all I need." Platinum replied, rolling his eyes as the two walked into the cafeteria area, which was currently a bit busy as you would expect from it early in the morning. "I honestly don't see why your body decides you need food. Just seems inconvenient in my option."
Hat Girl shook her head slightly with a chuckle as she walked over to the sideboard, where Burt and Fredrick were talking.
"I'm starting to get concerned over your coffee obsession, Burt." The Cheese wearing Toppat said, arms crossed as he glared at the man in front of him. The man always sounded like his throat was sore, at least to Hat Girl it did. She remembered questioning if he was alright when they first met.
"Coffee is nice, Fredrick." Burt said, the dyed orange part of his black hair covering one of his eyes, as per the usual. He always seemed to act like he had no emotions, and spent most of his days in his office or grabbing himself the drink that was currently the topic of their talk. "The fact that you never tried coffee worries me."
"I'm more of a Hot chocolate person, and besides, the smell alone is enough to turn me off." Fredrick stated, grabbing the lake of floating marshmallows in a cup along with the plate of 'Bacon, Egg, & Cheese Breakfast Bombs' he liked. "But I know all that coffee isn't healthy for you, I swear you drink more coffee then you eat actual food."
Burt rolled his eyes at the statement, before glancing around the area as he grabbed his coffee and toast. "Fine. I'll eat a little more today." With that, temporarily balancing his plate on his other arm, he grabbed one of the muffin-like items off Fredrick's plate and walked away.
Fredrick was frozen in shock for a few seconds, before huffing and glancing to the side. It was only then he realized the children of the leaders. "Oh, sorry you two, I didn't see you there. Off going to cause some trouble later I assume?"
"Possibly, possibly not." Platinum shrugged as Hat Girl chuckled, before giving her breakfast request to the cook-toppat that came by.
"I'll be taking that as a yes." Fredrick said, shaking his head. "Just uhh, do me a favor and don't go on a spree of spray-painting the inside of the vents, again. Took me and Sammy nearly the whole day to clean it last time."
"Alright, no spray paint in vents..." Platinum said, raising his arms in front of him slightly in defeat. He watched as Frederick left, before turning to his sister. "Want to finally see how many people we can surprise with airhorns tape to their chairs and doors?"
"Oh heck yeah!" Hat Girl said, giving her brother a thumbs up. And the Toppats that heard her shout began to feel a faint feeling of fear among them. They knew then that chaos caused by those two would come later that day.
-------
What they didn't know was on earth, a conversation was happening. About the true chaos.
"You sure this is... safe?" One government person asked another as they glanced at the cannon. Although cannon felt like an understatement. The place where the 'cannonball' would come out of look like it itself was 27 miles long. "For Earth I mean."
"Should be." The other replied, hoping away from the gears they were adjusting. "The material should begin to burn up after it makes contact with the toppat orbital station. The worst we should have to deal with are burning pieces of metal and stuff falling down to earth in the size of normal meteoroids."
"Am I the only one who feels this is a bit... extreme?" The first asked as they hop into the tunnel to the underground control system of the cannon. "I understand they've been a pain to deal with since they got up, but can't we just set up traps for them on earth."
"It's not just about the Toppats alone." The second stated as they followed the first, wanting to be as far away from the cannon before it blew its canon ball. "If other criminal organizations see what the clan has done, they'll likely follow in suit. Soon all crime might be unstoppable because those who caused it are up in space. Is that the world you want to live in?"
"No."
"Then we need to make a statement. And this is the only way. Now let's get to the control room, and get this party started..."
-------
Hat Girl had found herself staring out the cafeteria window as she finished her plate of breakfast, slightly blocking out what Platinum was talking about as he sat in front of her. This was a bit normal for the two, half the time they were inseparable during the day. Especially since the incident where Dad was captured, and Papa had to be turned into a cyborg to live. It was a bit of a struggle for the clan then, and even with Dad back it was a lot of work to make up all the money that had been stolen the night before they were meant to launch their station-
Her train of thought stopped as she faintly spotted something outside the window. She got off her seat and walked over to the window, placing her hand on it faintly as she glanced down at the planet they raided. There was some sort of... gray and slightly green ball thing. At first it was just a speck of dust, but it was getting bigger.. and bigger... it was coming to them, faster and faster.
"Hattie?" Platinum questioned, walking up next to his sister in confusion. "What's going on, you don't just leave a plate of food alone suddenly like that." She was a bit wordless at first, but managed to point to the strange thing. Platinum had to squint his eyes to see it. "That's... just a space rock."
"Coming FROM Earth?" Hat Girl asked, looking at her brother. "As a former space traveler, I have NEVER seen that happen, and I know that's not a normal occurrence for this planet. And not to mention it's perfectly... in the path of.. hitting... Get Dad and Papa and warn them, NOW!"
"Time to act serious for once then." The topbot said, quickly racing away from his sister and the group of toppats.
She glanced at the ball again, seeing it was getting closer and larger with each passing second. She found herself frozen like the poor souls in Vanessa's Manor, or the times she used her ice hat years ago. What was she going to do?
"Dad, Pops!" Platinum called as he reached the Cockpit of the rocket, taking an unneeded breath as he reached the door.
"Platinum?" Reginald asked, turning away from his cyborg husband as he glanced at his Robotic son. "What's going-"
"We need to move, or use Supreme Dominance." Platinum cut him off, with worry in fear shining in his orange eyes. "Now-"
At the very seconds, the 'cannonball' of metal and small bits of trash collided with the orbital station, hitting the middle of the rocket.
Hat Girl fell to her feet as the station twisted and chaos fell around her. Everything outside the window became a blur, as Toppats screamed in panic. She suddenly found her grip from the wall she'd grabbed onto slip, and she was slammed against another wall. Everything went black to her after that.
-------
It took a bit for her mind to process things as she awake, her body aching in places like she had a faint sunburn. She slowly opened her eyes with a groan, scanning the mix of dark and light. She appeared to be where the window of the cafeteria once was. Keyword there being once was because now it was a pile of glass on the grass below her. Some of the glass were close to her arms, and likely was responsible for the small cuts she saw on them. She glanced around as much as she could without getting up.
Chaos was the best word that could describe the current state of the station. Well, other then 'destroyed'. Parts of the orbital station the Toppats called home where broken and scattered across what she could only assume was a forest clearing. The earth was dragged up from a few parts finding themselves lodge into it. She was able to see a few Toppat members getting up or helping others up, while trying to take in what had just happened. Not like she could blame them, she knew exactly what happened, but was still trying to process it herself.
Their home was attacked, and was sent far from earth. Yet, judging by the fact none of them were suffocating, it meant this planet had oxygen or some other air humans could breathe in. Which made sense, they did land in a forest. But that meant they were out of the solar system...
Her train of thought was cut off by a sliver of a blur that entered her field of vision. At first she was a bit spooked out, until her vision adjusted, and she saw the familiar metal hand, only with a few faints scratches. She took the cold hand, although by now she was used to the chill, as Platinum helped her to her feet. "You ok, sis?"
"Y-Yeah." She said, letting go of his hand as she rubbed her arms slightly. She picked up her nearby fallen top hat, and made sure to check the side. She sighed in relief as her hand made badge, one that had the hats of her fathers on it, was still there, and placed that hat back on her head. "Some shards of glass cut me a bit when the window broke."
"Well... considering what just happened, it could have been a lot worse." Platinum looked around. "This is all so unreal..."
"Yeah..." She slowly walked past her brother as she glanced up at the sky, then around at all the greenery around them. Why... was she feeling like she had been here before? Her mind told her it was simply because it looked like earth, but her heart was insisting it was something more.
"Oi. Are ya ok, Reg?" Right Hand Man asked, as he helped the Chief onto his feet, worry in his human and robotic eyes.
"I'm fine. But... the others..." Reginald coughed slightly, before looking around the crash site, as much as he could without moving from his spot anyway.
As the leader of the Toppats, one skill he gained over the years was being somewhat-able to get a rough estimation of how many clan members were in his sight. And after seeing at least 100 Toppats in his vision, he knew others were likely on the other side of the rocket. Assuming at least 88 toppats were on that other side, it meant that a few were still stuck inside, likely injured or, worryingly, dead. Not to mention the children...
"Right Hand Man! Check the rumble for any trapped members!" He ordered, his voice and tone clear that there was no time to waste. He was still not fully used to his lover's cybernetics, watching his legs turn into a booster as he flew into one of the openings near the top. But he loved him all the same. He glanced at a nearby group of Toppats. "See if you can find anything from Medbay, and get it setup for any injured members!" The toppats seemed to be slightly surprised by his tone, but they quickly got to work, scanning the nearby areas.
"Sir." A voice appeared behind him. He turned around to see a man in a black jacket with his white shirt visible. "I know you likely don't want anyone else going into the wreckage, but-"
"Yes Quincy, go find the kids. Just be careful." Reginald answered, the fellow father wasting no time to do so in response, likely worried for his own daughter. The kids were in a pod similar to the leader's pod, it was one of the first things Reginald planned out when he made the blueprints. They would spend most of their days in there, it was the safest for them, especially if the place was to below up, they would already be in a pod and on their way to earth.
Hat Girl found herself walking near the nearby Woodline. That's when she noticed the traces of purple deeper down, and found herself frozen in realization.
Reginald noticed his daughter near the Woodline, and walked up to her. "Are you alright, Hattie?"
"I recognized this place." She said, looking at him. "I been here before."
Reginald's brown and blue eyes showed sudden confusion, tilting his head to the side ever so slightly. "You... what?"
"This was the planet I was on before I crashed onto earth." She responded. She then pointed out where the green of life and calmness turned into the creepy purple and black of dread and the unknown to all but her. "That ghost who's song Papa sings lives there."
"Really, the one with that Mafia, one of which went into space to try and get a toll from you?" Reginald question. He never thought his daughter was lying about the planet, but he figured he never find himself on said planet so he mostly just consider it stories.
"Yeah!" She exclaimed, childlike joy in her voice. She never really outgrew her childish side.
"Well... I suppose that means there's a town nearby, at least We should be able to get resources there." Reginald sighed, turning over his shoulder as Right Hand Man landed behind him. A look over the cyborg's shoulder showed some toppats in a little medbay-like area, some medically skilled Toppats using their skills to help the more injured Toppats, the 3rd in command Sven among them. He looked back at his partner in crime. "Was that everyone... alive in the rumble."
"Got everyone t'at was in t'e rubble." Right Hand Man stated. "Surprisingly, everyone lived."
Reginald was a bit surprised at this, but a smile formed on his face. "That's very relieving."
"So... what's the plan Dad?" Platinum asked, glancing at the Toppat leader slightly. "We can't just stay here with no place to rest, or prepare food." He paused for a second. "Well, you guys can't, at least."
Reginald brought his hand to his chin in thought, before dropping it and walking up a nearby rock. He cleared his throat, before calling out. "Can I have everyone's attention!?"
The clan members stopped whatever they were doing, except the few tending to the hurt Toppats, but he knew they were listening as well.
He took a breath before speaking. "As your Leader, I would be lying to you all if I were to claim I knew how to fix this, or the exact steps we should take next. We are the first of our kind to find ourselves stranded on a planet that can maintain life. But we cannot let this disturb us. It may be a long while, but I promise you, we will find our way home. But for now, survival is our goal, to watch after one-another, as clan and family." He paused briefly as he glanced at them all, lost souls unsure of what to do, before resuming. "Those of you who are well enough, see if you can move the walls detached from the station in order to make a temporary form of shelter. We do not know when a storm will come by, if this planet has storms at all. Look for supplies that fallen outside of the ship, only go in to retrieve items that are necessary for our survival. Go along the Woodline and look for wood for a fire. And trust in one another." With that, he backed up from his position on the rock.
Platinum watched as the clan members took a few seconds to process the orders, and the fact they were on another planet, before most started to look around. He spotted Burt and Fredrick walking up to a broken piece of wall, and seemed to start debating where the best place would go to serve as shelter. He saw Calla Fox, the one who stole the Ruby alongside Sven, slowly walk away from the Swedish man to help others look for supplies. He found himself glancing to where the purple part of the woods were hidden, his curiosity growing.
Reginald began to walk over to the wreckage that a few hours ago was the base of operations for the Toppat clan. "Hopefully we stolen enough we can sell in order to pay for what we need to fix the station..." He placed his head in his hands. "It's going to be so expensive..." He let out a muffle shout, not wishing to distract his clan members.
"Still t'ink ya s'ould 'ave let me 'unt after t'at pink-'aired government-kissin' t'ief." Right Hand Man grumbled, glancing at him. "Especially since we lost two members t'anks ta 'im."
Hat Girl watched her dads walked closer to the broken station, and went to follow them to help, before feeling a chilly hand grabbed her hand. "You said one of your friends lived in the creepy woods, right?"
She turned to look behind her, taking a second to glance at where the woods were before returning to her brother. "Yeah."
"And the creepy woods is in the direction of that purple stuff, riiiight?" Platinum voice showed intent, and seems to show he already knew the answer.
"Yea, The forest is kinda pretty in it's own way though, if memory serves me right-" She suddenly looked at him, processing the grin that appeared on his face. In response, she gave her own smart smirk. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
"We sneak away from the clan while they take care of the crash rocket mess and chill with your old pals?"
"YES!" She said, high fiving her brother as she bounced in the air slightly. "I been wanting to see them all again, but never thought I actually could until now! I just... hope they aren't still mad at me for sweeping them off of my spaceship."
"Come on, with your cute face as a child, and you still a bit childish face now?" Platinum asked, warping an arm around her shoulder. "They'll forgive you in a heartbeat."
She nodded, a smile on her face as removed her brother's arm around her shoulder. "Catch me if you can then, brother." She said, sticking out her tongue with a 'bleeh" and raced into the woods. She heard a shout from her brother, something about 'cheating' by 'not telling him' and heard his metal feet click ageist the ground to catch up to her. She let out a giggle before shouting once they were a safe distance away from the clan. "Snatcher, here we come!"
15 notes · View notes
aahsokaatano · 3 years
Note
King I would love that essay about Changing Channels
Fjdjshjdhdjd thanks for reading my tags Jesse you're the real VIP here.
Okay SO "Changing Channels" is the 8th episode of the 5th season of Supernatural. I give this information bc it's important in looking at the context of the episode - now I've complained a LOT about how SPN is terrible at giving us canonical timeframes within the episodes (y'all i was SHOCKED to discover the first season is supposed to cover a little over a year's worth of time, I thought it was like... 4 or 5 months) so I can't say for sure how long before and after the other episodes happen in-universe around "Changing Channels" BUT
The episode before is "The Curious Case of Dean Winchester" where Dean and Bobby bet years of their lives in a game of poker with a witch. The episode after is "The Real Ghostbusters" where Sam and Dean end up at a fan convention for the in-universe Supernatural novels.
Why am I pointing this out? Because it's important, please, no audience participation, this is like a Brian David Gilbert panel.
[under a cut bc this got...... STUPID long. Who knew I still had this many opinions about SPN in 2020?]
Okay first of all I wanna talk about the cinnamon topography of this episode - I love the way the first 5 seasons are shot because you really feel the americana gothic horror aesthetic they were going for (I have a whole ‘nother rant about the first 5 seasons vs the last 10 but thats for another time). Everything is a little washed out and grey-toned, the camera angles generally serve to make Sam and Dean appear even taller than they actually are (larger than life - again, another post for another time), and there’s honestly a LOT of shots from the ‘monster’s’ perspective, which is really neat! I’ve said it before (on another blog - YES i have a dedicated spn rant blog, don’t @ me hdjfhfjfh) but the episode that really got me hooked on spn back in the day was the second one, about the w*ndigo. Yes, it’s a racist, culturally appropriating shitstorm, but the way its SHOT is fantastic. I’m honestly not a horror fan, but that episode could have easily relied on jumpscares and they DIDN’T and it was scary as all fucking hell and just - fuck okay getting off topic. 
In “Changing Channels” we get that distinctive grey-washed tone in the beginning and the very end of the episode, but the middle? When they’re in TV Land? Everything is bright. Almost comically so, I mean - okay look at these two shots of Sam (apologies about the crappy phone pics, netflix won't let me screenshot)
Tumblr media
This one is from the start of the episode, in the "real" police station
Tumblr media
And this is from a little later in the "TV" hospital
Ignoring that my phone is washing him out a lot in both pics, you can still see the warmer tones in the hospital shot as compared to the cold greyness in the police station one
Okay, now look at this picture
Tumblr media
Dean inside the Impala, and those warm tones are back. Why? Because even though Sam and Dean believe that they’re back in the “real” world, they aren’t - so instead of the grey-washed shots that we’re used to, its the bright and warm shots that we see in “TV Land”! So the viewers pick up, even if its just subconsciously, that the boys aren’t out of the woods yet - everything is still too bright to be the in-universe reality we’ve come to expect from SPN by season 5
Which is also why i love this shift so much
Tumblr media Tumblr media
These shots are literally SECONDS apart. The first is in "TV Land" and the second is in the "real" world. I have some red strip lights behind my bed, which are reflecting off my laptop screen - notice how much brighter they seem in the second picture? That’s because literally all of the warm colors have been drained out of the shot. As soon as Gabriel snaps them all back into “reality,” things get so much colder.
Okay, so the second thing I want to talk about is some of the very pointed dialogue choices within the “shows” the Winchesters take part in. Not between Sam and Dan and Gabriel, but from the, for lack of a better term, NPCs within the shows.
In the hospital, Dr. Piccolo tells Sam that he is “the finest cerebrovascular neurosurgeon I have ever met - and I have met plenty! So that girl died on your table; it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anybody’s fault. Sometimes people just die.” Standard cheesy soap opera dialogue - but lemme just swap some words here and - 
“You are the finest hunter I have ever met - and I have met plenty! So that girl died on your hunt; it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anybody’s fault. Sometimes people just die.”
Or even - 
“You are the finest hunter I have ever met - and I have met plenty! So Jessica and Mary died above you; it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anybody’s fault [but Azazel’s]. Sometimes people just die.”
Keeping in mind that the NPCs are basically Gabriel’s mouthpieces, its easy to see why so many people ship Sabriel. I’d actually love to see a fic that explores them talking about this moment in particular later on and the kind of gentle forgiveness that Gabriel can give Sam... getting off topic again.
In an abrupt about-face, the herpes commercial (much meme’d within the fandom) is straight up Gabriel shaming Sam. Because if you replace “genital herpes” with “demon blood” it’s.... dark. And very intentional.
So that’s what I did! (I combined all spoken lines to make the message easier to read, rather than splitting them up across 3 speakers as in the episode)
“I’ve drank demon blood. I tried to be responsible... did I try. But now, after being forcibly detoxed, I fight my addiction every day to reduce the chances of passing back into that toxic mindset. Ask your loved ones about a demon blood intervention today. [...] I am doing all I can to slightly lessen the chance of drinking demon blood again. And that’s a good thing.”
Like... the subtext throughout this episode sure is. Something.
Okay this is getting ridiculously long so I wanna wrap up by talking about The Best Scene In The Whole Goddamn Show
I’m talking, of course, about Gabriel’s Confession
“Max,” you might be saying, “there are so many better scenes out there, even within the first five seasons!” and to that i say, again, no audience participation, please. Also, you’re WRONG and here’s why!
Gabriel’s confession hits every goddamn emotional chord that the fandom begged for on this show - fear, rage, grief, pain, guilt, and even, yes, absolution. 
Okay, here’s the scene again for those of you who don’t think about it at least once a week like me
youtube
Now this video is missing some of the conversation, but most of it is there, enough for you to see what I’m talking about. Gabriel up to this point has been, essentially, a nameless antagonist - this is the third episode he appeared in, and before this, we didn’t even know he was going by Loki. He was just referred to as ‘The Trickster’. But here, not only do we get a name (a real name at that), but we also get a glimpse of his backstory and a hell of a lot of character development in less than 5 minutes. I mean, Sam didn’t get this much character development throughout the entirety of season 1! There’s a good reason Gabriel has been a fan-favorite for a very long time, and I think a big part of it is this particular scene.
Because here, we get to see Gabriel being vulnerable. And we even see Dean show a little vulnerability, as he can empathize being the third party to explosive arguments between the two people who mean everything to him.
I mean... okay, it will never see the light of day, but I wrote a little bit of a Reverse ‘Verse fic (because I’m a sucker for Reverse ‘Verse) and this was the scene I started with. Not s1e1, not even the resurrection in s4e1, but this scene. Because this scene, more than any other, is critical to the way not only Gabriel’s (first) arc plays out, but also to how Sam and Dean conduct themselves for the rest of the season (and maybe a bit beyond, it’s been a hot minute since I watched s6 and later). Dean is angry but determined, he has a point to make, he is going to save Sammy and if he can’t do that, then he’s going to damn well die trying. But Sam... it’s after this episode that we start really seeing how bone-achingly tired Sam is. It’s after this conversation - where one of the other archangels, one of the few beings who can truly understand how powerful Michael and Lucifer are - says that there’s no other way around this that Sam seems to start inching towards giving in. Saying yes.
Sure, in the actual episode, he seems outraged by the idea, practically scoffs at it - “you want us to say yes to those sons of bitches?” - but it’s after this where Sam really seems run down.
I mean, look at the episodes before and after (HAH you thought I forgot about that first point I made at the very beginning of this post! I did, briefly, but I’ve circled back to it, thanks for being understanding). In “The Curious Case of Dean Winchester,” Sam behaves much as he did since the start of s4, which is to say, ‘annoying little know-it-all brother tossed into the middle of the apocalypse and just trying his best’ and it works well for the mad scramble for any scrap of information that’s happening in s4/early s5.
But in “The Real Ghostbusters” it’s different. This is another funny meta episode - except, while Sam and Dean are technically aware of the joke, they aren’t as amused by it as the audience is. And it’s not because of the ghosts. It’s because they’re just... done. Especially Sam. Dean has that nice little moment with the cosplayers at the end of the episode, but Sam... threatens to shoot Chuck. Sam ‘goes darkside’ more often than pretty much any other character in the show, but that moment is different. It’s a flat promise, not a threat. He’s not being an asshole, like he is after losing his soul. He’s just... done. And it’s obvious to see.
Gabriel’s confession is the turning point for Sam in s5, and it informs a lot of his behavior through the rest of s5, and possibly beyond! Like I said, I haven’t watched past s5 in a very long time, so I don’t feel confident enough to analyze that specific sort of character line, but I feel confident in saying that hearing one of the most powerful beings in the universe basically say “it doesn’t matter what you do - your destiny is unavoidable” and then he’s proven right (Sam says yes to Lucifer, and Dean eventually does say yes to Michael down the line!)... like, that’s really gotta fuck up your world view that was built on free will and throwing off the shackles of fate. Sam managed to avoid his ‘destiny’ in s2... but then it turns out that that wasn’t ever his destiny. Lucifer was his destiny.
Talk about an obscured view of the inner self.
36 notes · View notes
ganymedesclock · 4 years
Note
So... What do you think about revisiting Danny phantom in general? Revisiting the fandom I've noticed a lot of fanfic that have Danny's parents finding out his deal rather violently, or generally having more violence/angst than the original show..
I’m assuming you’re sending me this ask because of my recent burst of Danny Phantom art, so, it’s probably not a surprise to say I’m doing a certain amount of revisiting myself, and certainly not about to shame anyone else for it. It was a very dear cartoon to me in many ways and left some enduring hallmarks on my own writing, and I can absolutely understand people feeling the same way.
That said, as someone who’s been in this fandom for a while, albeit quietly- there certainly is a thread of macabre interest in fandom spaces, one I don’t always know that I agree with, especially when it comes to the Fentons.
My personal verdict on the Fenton parents specifically is I think they are not handled fairly by canon. This is a problem that Danny Phantom as a show shares with Fairly Odd Parents, though I would argue the Turner parents in FOP are quite a bit worse at this.
Roughly, I think how the Fenton parents are canonically depicted suffers from a phenomenon that affects many parts of the show: DP, as a series, has a bit of a sense of confused priorities between comedy and drama, and as a result, what’s 'real’ in-universe and what’s “just supposed to be a joke”. The kind of humor that DP tends to spring for is exaggerated or shocking behavior- it also tends to be a humor that hinges on the idea that other people are generally inconvenient to the main character. So humor-characterization is inconsistent here- Jack is negligent until it’s more inconvenient to depict him as overbearing (see: Girl’s Night Out and other cases he desperately wants to bond with Danny) he’s a recluse only loved by his wife until it’s more inconvenient to depict him as having an active social life (Masters Of All Time and that he and Maddie are going to a themed party so they’re dressed ‘weirdly’ in public)
A big victim of this is Jack’s sense that ghosts aren’t people and his desire to dissect them. Because here is the thing: it’s all talk, in the worst way. It hinges on the idea Jack- someone who knows enough of what he’s doing that along with Maddie and, in the past, Vlad- ripped two different holes in reality hard enough to permanently alter someone’s relation to undeath- has never seen a ghost before the series as he says in Mystery Meat.
The series has a big problem where it hinges on the Fentons’ inventions and expertise but also wants to treat them like idiots constantly. And if you notice how much I’m talking exclusively about Jack- that’s part of the problem. Maddie, in many ways, outside of episodes that throw her a bone, despite constantly being told by people she’s too good for Jack, is really treated as an extension of Jack. Masters Of All Time even suggests that her choosing Jack in the first place was just a path of least resistance between her two college friends, and she’d have married whichever one stuck around. 
The Fentons are not respected as experts, so Jack is given his ignorant line about dissecting a ghost. The Fentons need to remain exaggerated, ridiculous, an inconvenience to Danny- so they threaten his alter ego and point guns at him, but this is funny and not serious and not a reason to be worried about them as parents, because they are not on Danny’s level. Nobody is ever on Danny’s level. There is literally an episode called The Ultimate Enemy. The antagonist is an evil future Danny. The only person who could ever be Danny’s ultimate nemesis is Danny himself. 
And when the series stops milking the Fentons for jokes about how they’re so stupid and how Jack is an idiot and Maddie married that idiot but even she doesn’t respect him even though she loves him and dutifully follows him everywhere and god how can these people care about ghosts they’re so ignorant and out of their league- 
-then it kinda shuffles its feet awkwardly and goes, yeah. the Fentons love each other, and love their kids.
Yeah, Jack has framed photographs of Maddie, Jazz, and Danny on his personal workstation.
Yeah, in Mystery Meat Jack was seriously debating walking away from his lifework because it upset one of his kids. 
Yeah, every time in canon the Fentons find out Danny’s secret they’re immediately all in supporting him.
Yeah, even not knowing it’s Danny, Jack has an amiable conversation with him in Million Dollar Ghost and the ghost containment units designed by the Fentons get some jokes about that they’re a little cramped but they aren’t horrifying prisons of inhumanity- and as soon as Danny Phantom the ghost boy has a good point, Jack lets him go on purpose. 
Yeah, Jack is a competent ghost hunter who can take on Skulker and win as well as beat down the giant lake monster Skulker brought with him in Girls’ Night Out and would do this in a heartbeat, no jokes and no sidetracks, because that monster just chewed on his baby boy and nobody does that to his baby boy.
Yeah, Maternal Instinct is an entire episode of Maddie throwing hands with (or deceiving and manipulating) literally anything she thinks was responsible for getting Danny in this dangerous situation.
...And then the series says “but that’s not funny! Here, have jokes about the Fenton Stockades, that exist and have spikes and Jack wants to put his kids in them for time out, when the spikes apparently don’t hurt given Jack is not injured for being put in there. Here, have a joke about Jack attacking Jazz with a vacuum cleaner because he gets hellbent on the idea she’s possessed for no good reason. Here, have an uncomfortable joke about how badly Jack Fenton wants to vivisect a ghost while it screams. Funny funny funny. Why- why are you flinching?”
It basically creates a comedic situation where the show is constantly winding up like it’s gonna punch you- with the idea that the Fentons are bad parents and this has consequences for Danny and Jazz personally- and then laughs in your face if you flinch. It’ll never actually punch you- but it will sure keep swinging its hand really close to your face and laughing at your reactions.
This is, I’m just gonna say- one of the worst elements of the series, this weird relationship it has with “hahaha are we depicting an abusive family or not? ;)” where its actual point is that Jack Fenton is a person who should be shamed for being overzealous, for caring about this niche field, because nobody cares about ghosts! (unless the entire premise of the show does) Nobody wants to think about ghost science! That’s LAME! (unless Vlad does it)
So I think ultimately this creates a polarizing experience in the fandom. What part of this information do you take?
Do you take, say, my personal approach, which is: 
“Hey, so it’s pretty clear and consistent that the Fentons love their kids and wouldn’t hurt them. The Fentons are nice people. They can be obsessive or headstrong but there’s nuanced and salient ways to examine this in the basic framework that they care, both about their family specifically, and in general- and while I think they can have flaws or conflicts with their kids, and with ambient ghosts in the world, I really don’t think they’re in danger of torturing a sapient entity in their basement and it frustrates and annoys me that canon ‘makes a joke’ of them doing these things because it thinks they’re so incompetent that these things are not really malicious actions, when- whether or not you successfully shoot them, it takes a certain kind of person to point a weapon you know is dangerous at something that looks, and talks, like a fourteen-year-old, especially when you’re a parent who has probably at least once in your life worried about something happening to your kids, and the ghost of a teenager means something happened to someone’s kid, in a general sense.
So my end conclusion on the Fentons is I think they are being depicted in a kind of metatextual bad faith, that they are not cruel or malicious people, and in my personal take or understanding on the series, I’d massively dial down those elements, and if any remain, take them seriously as problems they have in their relationships with other people.”
Or do you take an approach more rooted in,
“If the Fentons are shown to be negligent parents they are negligent parents, I’m going to examine and depict them as that, and I find this very hard to forgive, so it’s going to have real and nasty consequences.”
Both are basically valid. The place where I tend to get a little uncomfortable is twofold:
First, I think sometimes people just really want some fictional tragedy to either create or consume, and to that end, you aren’t going to get much juicy drama out of the Fentons being reasonable people. This isn’t evil or unforgivable, but for me, it’s definitely my least favorite fannish content to create or consume. I’m no fan of angst for angst’s sake, and I feel like there’s enough misery and heartbreak in the world that I’m not interested in wallowing in it unless it’s got something interesting to say.
Second- and this is a point I’m gonna be saltier: A lot of abusive Fenton fics that refuse to forgive them for the poorer-taste jokes the series makes, simultaneously give Vlad a blank check, when he has done targetedly malicious things to Danny. 
Now- do I also have a more sympathetic read on Vlad, and feel like canon also gives him a bad rap? Yeah! But you can’t have it both ways. You can’t say, “I can’t forgive the Fentons for stuff that was tagged onto them because canon thought it was funny, but I’m gonna editorialize Vlad’s depiction to lionize him as the ideal parent figure for Danny to run into the arms of.”
And the main reason I get so worked up in this, is I feel like Jack in particular (when Maddie is characterized as subordinate to Jack, following his cues, etc., and that’s its own demon) is... characterized as kind of a mocking caricature of traits that I personally recognize as an autistic and ADHD person.
Because the reality is? In many practical ways, I am Jack Fenton.
I like a bunch of weird stuff people find unacceptable or gross, like bugs
I’m hyperlexic (that means I talk, a lot)
Scatterbrained, forget words or where I left something or, sometimes, to do something important
Passionate and excitable including and especially in situations where it’s not normal, or expected, to have this much energy
I absolutely can forget birthdays, even for people I love dearly that mean the world to me! It’s horrible! There’s almost nothing I can do about it! My brain refuses to hold onto this information reliably and no amount of caring fixes it.
And being this way, living like this? My worst nightmare has always been that people think I either don’t care or that I’m just too much of a stupid, flippant buffoon to get right.
The thing about Jack is he’s “a person like me” and he’s “a person like me” who was designed to be a joke. We’re clearly expected to view him as untrustworthy, stupid, just like a big dumb dog of a man who barks in the wrong directions, who sometimes, when it counts, fetches a stick like he’s supposed to. Good job, Lassie. You got little Timmy out of the well.
And I am going to say with certainty and confidence that feeling like this is how people see me is the most unbelievably crushing feeling I have ever experienced in my life. That my excitement and passion means I’m unprofessional, stupid, don’t know what I’m talking about. It’s nearly painful for me, as an adult, to watch Danny Phantom because the show can never get off Jack’s case. And the few times it does, he hauls overtime arduously to make a difference, to help, to build something that will protect others, to put his own life on the line to stop hostile ghosts.
And immediately, then he goes back to being stupid stupid dog man. ha ha. why does his wife love him? no wonder his kids don’t ever want to be seen with him. no wonder his best friend is trying to kill him and he doesn’t even know, the big idiot.
(never mind that we see a scenario where he does know. and admits he would’ve forgiven Vlad anyway. but he can’t forgive Vlad hurting Danny.)
Tumblr media
So to rein in this wild tangent: I’m not saying all must love Jack Fenton and despair. I’m not even telling people to hide their angst. If I have a sincere request, it’s this:
If you’re inclined to thinking of Vlad as a cool, troubled, complex person (as I do!) and are haunted by the implications of The Ultimate Enemy specifically for Vlad, that when Danny lost everyone else in his life that Vlad really genuinely tried to help, and was not gloating and happy and victorious to have Danny as his protege, and when that went badly, he was haunted to the end of his days by not having been able to help-
-but immediately turn around and think Jack is just a rotten awful person who’d absolutely hurt his own kid in spite of canon to the contrary (when there’s just as much, if not more, canon of Vlad being willfully hostile)
It might be good to examine why you’re feeling this way, and if this might not come down to the fact that even when canon has people call Vlad a desperately lonely fruit loop, it has a lot more respect for him than it does for Jack, and this isn’t because it’s actually taking a stance against any of the qualities it gave Jack that someone might find disagreeable- it’s because Jack’s just “a big old fat idiot nobody likes, right?”
and that’s... not something comfy to buy into.
100 notes · View notes
draggingthedregs · 4 years
Text
as i said earlier, it is an ungodly length but i hope you can enjoy my late night, book-drunk opinions anyway!
***
guess who just finished “ruin and rising”?
i’m seriously not okay. someone send help. i got lots of thoughts, none of which you are obligated to read but this seems like the best place to share.
oh and spoilers, duh.
for starters. woah.
i can’t say it was what i expected but i had known that what my heart really wanted was kinda far out of reach. the ending felt real and feasible, complete with love and loss.
in terms of “ruin and rising” alone, i think it was possibly the strongest of the three books. the pacing was good, nothing felt like it dragged on too long or went too fast for its own good. i think that was really important as well, considering the fact that there was always something going on. literally,, always. no one ever got a damn break.
mal’s “death” hurt me more then i had expected. which honestly leads back to one of my main gripes with this story. the love square (which i elaborate on later in this post, just hold on a bit). i’m not going to lie. i hated mal. through the middle of “siege and storm” up to page 168 of “ruin and rising” (and even then it was a long road from hate to crying over him). he was an ass, i think we can all admit that. for awhile there, i even jumped on the “fuck mal” train and had no plans to stop at any station anytime soon. for the longest time, the relationship with alina felt so fragile and forced, like the only reason it existed was because leigh had written it into existence. though, as i read on, i saw why it was so strained and saw the eventual resolution, which i will admit i was happy with. mal and alina, however annoying and troupe filled their personalities were, did develop as characters. and their relationship made some semblance of sense in the grand scheme of things. does that mean i forgive the “on-again-off-again”, “cold-shoulder”, “we-cant-be-together-in-this-lifetime” bullshit? no. does that mean i suddenly love mal? also, no. does that mean i ship them? ugh slightly. does that mean in a magical dream world where i got to chose what happened, they’d still end up together? impossible to say. BUT i can say, that they deserved each other. and i am happy that they got their peace together like they both always wanted (no matter how out of place it felt at any point), especially considering the fact that she literally had to kill him.
my dear dear darkling... i knew what fate awaited you and yet, when the time came... it hurt just the same.
okay,, that was a bit dramatic. but come on. leigh wrote a damn good villain with aleksander morozova. i meAN, thE lAYERS. he was a horrible person and yet, so many of us still love him. he killed for fun, manipulated no matter the cost, preyed upon the weak because he could, literally blinded his own mother and still! i can’t help but love him. there was so much human woven into his darkness. the moments of simple longing, of exhaustion, of loneliness. in all honesty, if there had been a way to humanize him, to erase or explain away his atrocities and have him just be aleksander again, i feel like i would do it. but, in the context of the story i do understand why it wasn’t possible. redemption for the darkling was off the table, no matter how much humanity still remained. but that’s what makes him such a good character. you want him to be different because you can see the good and all the potential for things to change, for them to rule ravka side by side, but at the same time, he’s the same man who is still actively creating more shadow demon creatures to eat whoever he wishes. you can’t resist him and that’s why he’s so wonderful, yet horrifying at the exact same time. (though don’t worry i am still a trash can and the darklina ship is still superior in the love square. again, i promise i will get there).
i feel like i have to talk about how much i loved the “secondary characters” (i struggle to call them that because they actually run this shit). i will say, at first, i hated zoya. i am not a big fan of the “mean girl” troupe or the “i’m-prettier-than-you-and-i-know-it” thing but... she really grew on me. i looked forward to zoyas comments and constant bitchiness, as did the characters in the books. and when she left the note and the blue kefta with alina in the epilogue,, oh god my heart. and the ragtag crew of grisha making up the remainder of the second army were amazing. their banter and dialogue were some of my favorite scenes to read in “ruin and rising” and i want books just filled with them and only them. david and genya deserve the damn world, adrik was so great, nadia and tamar are so precious, and i will miss harshaw’s weird ass more then you’ll ever know. don’t even get me started on misha and oncat. they are the true stars of this series, you cannot convince me otherwise. god i love them all so much, what a brilliant cast of characters. except the apparat. fuck the stupid ass apparat.
i know what you’re thinking. “you forgot nikolai.” no. i promise you, i most certainly did not. i just love him so much he gets his own chunk.
i mean, how could he not? he’s one of those rare, genuinely perfect characters that are impossible to not love. and i don’t mean perfect because he has no flaws or he’s written unnaturally, i mean perfect because of all of his flaws. he is arrogant and calculating, brash and unapologetic in his ways, but he’s also kind and caring, witty and charming and way too clever for his own good. i rooted for him more then i have ever rooted for someone in my entire life. he made everything ten times better. you can always count on his ass to pop up in a flying ship with a shiny pair of boots, a witty remark, a new plan, and too many ideas.
now, the important business... the ominous love square.
i think the words i used were “one of my main gripes with the story” which is true, but i think leads to a bigger issue with some of the characterization in the story. the “love square” was a term i thought of in relation to the many overlapping and confusing ships that center around alina (obviously being mal, the darkling, and nikolai). all of the ships were so entertwined and written over top of one another that there was no other way for me to describe it and the square seemed like a nice enough analogy. it just felt like way too much on everybody’s plates.
i love nikolai and alinas friendship. i mean, LOVED it. because i loved it so much, i found the little nods to a ship odd and unnecessary. their story line was very focused on the fact that ravka would need a king and queen, hence the scene where he gives her the emerald and all but proposes right then and there. however, that scene would have made scene and carried the same weight had there not been the splashes of romance both before and after. now, i understand why people ship them. and honestly, if under different circumstances, i probably could’ve and would’ve shipped them myself. they would have had one of the best marriages in a society where you didn’t get to marry for love. but it just made everything more complicated. people would’ve speculated on a ship had there been no kisses or pining, soley based on the possibility of a marriage and because of their close friendship so, why was the canon addition of it necessary? i just couldn’t get behind it when i loved their platonic relationship so much and when there were two stronger and more developed ships, waging war in the background.
now, my final bone to be picked... let’s be real for a second, alina in “shadow and bone” sucked. she was annoying and had no personality beyond being a sad, lonely, orphan in the darklings sparkly new grisha world. though i will say, in the later two books, i grew to like her. her character development did its job and i actually think she grew to be a pretty good protagonist. she did her best with the cards she was dealt and i think she did really well. however, her inability to pick a boy constantly bothered me. after being in love with her best friend for literal years, she is really ready to be be the first lady of the second army. and yes. sure you could justify it. she wasn’t getting letters in return, she’d been away for months, she was adapting to her new life, the darkling made her feel seen and wanted which is all a very new feeling to her. but then she goes right back to mal after he makes a confession that he didn’t realize he loved or needed her until she was gone for months (this was one of my biggest problems with mal. my problem only grew when he spent the entirety of “siege and storm” being a dick. but like i said,, we have reconcilied. we are fine now). there were times throughout the series where i genuinely didn’t understand why they were together, why i liked them together, or why i even wanted them to end the series together. alina even asks mal at the end of “ruin and rising” if there entire relationship was based solely on the fact that mal was the last amplifier and the fact that she even had to ask really says something. was their entire romance because of the amplifier? was it because of the “we-are-just-meant-to-be-together” thing? or was there actual chemistry? i really couldn’t tell sometimes. and the darklina ship was even more twisty and winding. he went from telling her deep dark secrets because he wanted to hear the girl he loved say his name to literally threatening everyone she loves because he wants her weak and all to himself. like,, whAt? (again,, layers) and don’t even get me started on the darkling and alina apparition interactions. those were a wild fucking ride. i felt like i was getting manipulated along with the both of them in those. but maybe that was the point of the darkling and alinas relationship. it was supposed to be so horrible yet so electric that you couldn’t pull away. but i doubt the same was meant to be said for mal and alina.
now i feel like i may be coming off in the wrong way. i loved more about this series then i didn’t. but me gushing about every fine detail and conversation that made my heart melt wouldn’t make for the most interesting read, if it was even coherent. all in all, i think it’s safe to say the grisha trilogy is great. does that mean it doesn’t have flaws? of course not. does that mean the flaws outweigh the good and the actual point of the story? absolutely not. my small complaints about a few things really do not take always from the fact that i love this series. i would love anything written by leigh bardugo, especially in the grishaverse.
if you’ve made it this far, that’s commitment. thank you brave soldier. don’t take anything i’ve said with anything more than a grain of salt. seriously. if this is your favorite series, don’t let my lil complaints ruin your day. because really, the good outweighs the bad here tenfold. i’m just a girl with a lot of opinions and a platform to share them at four am... it’s a dangerous game.
but, goodbye grisha trilogy. you have served me well and i will return to reread you soon. but for now i will do a lot of writing (i already have so many fic ideas brewing) and read all the fan fiction and tumblr posts i’ve been avoiding for fear of spoilers.
37 notes · View notes
thespiralgrimoire · 4 years
Note
Would you consider posting your thoughts on the Twilight series? Because the bits and pieces I catch on your main are HILARIOUS though maybe it’s just because I find salt hysterical LOL
Oh good grief
Under a read more for my sake if not anyone else’s
The year was 2007. I was 11 year old, in 6th grade, nursing a substantial superiority complex over my classmates, and idolizing the 7th grade girls. This is where my story begins.
Now I won’t get into all the semantics as to why I was such an insufferable little garbage person in middle school, but I will tell you that I was convinced that I was not like other girls. While this proved true, my reasons as to why were completely off the mark in my tweens. Back then, I thought it was because I was smarter, wiser, and more mature than any of the other 6th grade girls in my class.
But not the 7th grade girls. The 7th grade girls were it, man. Nobody was cooler or smarter or more creative than the handful of ladies who were blessed with the patience to put up with my nonsense in middle school. So naturally, when they read Twilight, I read Twilight.
Twilight, if you have the good fortune to not be intimately aware of it by now, is about the Bella Swan, blandest girl in the entire world, moving to a small town to live with her emotionally awkward father, where she meets the Cullens, a clan of vampires who don’t drink human blood, because they’re trying to be morally upright. Her scent is irresistible to one of the vampires, (the only single one among them because the rest are dating each other) named Edward. Edward has the ability to read minds, and Bella is the only person he’s ever met who is immune to this power. I must stress again that she smells so good that he has to physically restrain himself from eating her, and murdering all witnesses. For reasons I can’t really remember now except “because that’s what the books are about”, they fall in love.
Here’s the thing about these books: Even as I was reading them, they gave me the creeps. Something in my little baby mind was vaguely aware that Edward was a messed up motherfucker, and Bella was a one-dimensional stand-in for the reader, and everything interesting in this story was happening on the fringes, facilitated by the far more interesting side characters. There were parts of these books that were uncomfortable to read. There were parts that made me seriously question why these books were so popular. There were parts that made it physically difficult to keep reading. About 3 things happen in the entirety of this series that feels good and satisfying, and none of them are things that the author, who I will derogatorily refer to as Smeyer, meant to be satisfying.
Two things kept me reading these books. The first was, obviously, the 7th grade girls, and my other friends in other grades who quickly caught the hype wave.
The second. Was the fact. That the writing style of these books, despite being the modem for a story that is absurd at best and a giant, flaming, stinking dumpster fire of bad takes, racism, and sexism at worst, is HYPNOTIC. A lot of my opinions about this series have changed drastically over the years, but this is one that I was acutely aware of even as I was reading these books. No matter how stupid or frustrating or repulsive the things that Smeyer is writing are, her writing style will not let you put the story down once you’re invested. And since I was reading these for social clout, I was invested on page 1. I want to believe that this was a trick played on my young mind, but after reading the first chapter of Midnight Sun (the newly released book that is literally just Twilight from Edward’s POV instead of Bella’s), I can confirm that this woman’s style is genuinely Like That. I enjoyed maybe 6 sentences of the 15-page chapter and I am still frothing at the mouth to read more.
So now that I’ve justified why I subjected myself to this shit in the first place, let’s get to some feelings about it.
Edward is a CREEP. He knows this. His family knows this. His love rival knows this. The only person who does not know this, rendering the fact completely inconsequential to the events of the story, is Bella. I’m not really willing to talk about how Edward is such a disgusting model for what young girls should expect out of a partner that there was discourse for MONTHS over Fifty Shades of Grey, but.... Edward is such a disgusting model for what young girls should expect out of a partner that Fifty Shades of Grey exists. It’s literally Twilight fanfiction. Fact check me. I wish I was making this up.
Bella is, as I said before, a cardboard cutout of a human being. The book is from her point of view, and includes copious amounts of her thoughts, and yet it’s still clear that she has absolutely no personality. She is supposed to be your Jane Everywoman, and yet there is not a single relatable thing about her. Her three personality traits are Brown Eyes, Clumsy (but not in a way that matters often), and Likes Edward. That’s it. This girl has nothing going on, which only draws more attenton to the fact that literally everyone else in the story has a rich and interesting backstory. But they’re side characters and this is about Stale White Bread Bella over here, so go fuck yourself if you want more information on Rosalie using her vampire abilities to get revenge on her fiance and his buddies, who assaulted her to the point of near death, or Alice, who sees the future and spent a good chunk of her life in an asylum, or Jasper, who was a Union soldier fighting the Civil War which was ALSO the vampire war???? Fuck off with that shit, this is about Bella.
But you know who the best characters are? The werewolves. But not REAL werewolves. These are Native Americans whose initial transformation is triggered by the proximity of the vampires, because vampires once terrorized their people and now this ability to turn to wolves is hereditary to protect themselves. The fact that these fellas are not REAL werewolves, and that there are real lycanthropes of lore, is mentioned in passing in the last book and never mentioned by anyone ever again.
One of these wolves is Jacob, Bella’s childhood friend and, for the first two books, an absolute sweetheart. Just a big goofball who’s a couple years younger than Bella, and all he wants is the best for her. Real wholesome shit. When Edward leaves her because he thinks that she’s too attached (SHE IS),  Jacob literally talks Bella back from the brink. The wolf pack, and the Native American tribe, welcome her as one of them. They’re adorable. I can’t stress enough that they would have also been an excellent candidate for the focal point of this shitshow.
But it doesn’t last. Edward does some real dumb shit in Italy and Bella has to go rescue him, which tips off the Vampire Illuminati that Edward was trying to get killed by (i.e. the real dumb shit). They don’t like that Bella, a human, knows about them, and demands that she be turned. Edward’s family is divided on this. Eventually they decide that they got time because the Vampire Illuminati are ancient and don’t have a good enough sense of time to hold them accountable immediately.
So Bella is fine and Edward is fine and everybody is back in the same town and they’re dating again and literally everyone in the town is like Bella what the FUCK. Nobody likes Edward because they think he’s no good for Bella. They are written like the bad buys. Jacob especially, becomes a huge asshole. Because he decides that he’s in love with Bella now. Because werewolves can imprint on people, which is just a sloppy soul mate mechanic used for absolute evil in this story. He wants to fight Edward over her. Edward is chomping at the bit to throw down, but pretends to be the bigger person even though he’s just as big an asshole about all this as Jacob is. This is as misogynist as it sounds. From this point on Jacob is now also a creep.
Oh, but it gets worse!
I gotta talk about the last book in the series now, Breaking Dawn. Because this shit was so awful that it made me regret, instantaneously, ever second I spent enjoying Twilight.
Bella and Edward get married after they graduate high school because Edward is a religious virgin and Bella is HORNY. They go on their honeymoon. Bella gets pregnant. This is Not Something That Is Supposed To Happen.
Smeyer tells us WHY this happened post-canon. Edward, the virgin, has never nutted. Because of this, he still has living sperm in his balls. So when he boffed Bella, his 80-year-old sperm made it count. I wish I was making this up, y’all. I’m tearing up thinking about it.
Bella is now pregnant with a half-vampire baby that is destroying her body from the inside out. It is growing at an exponential rate. She’s eight months along after three weeks. Edward can hear its thoughts. It loves Bella. Bella has to drink blood or die. Jacob is like What the Fuck. I am also, pretty thoroughly like What the Fuck. A couple members of the Cullen family are, very quietly, like What the Fuck.
Queue the most forced and ineffectual pro-life discourse you’ve ever read in your life.
All is well and good until it’s not. Baby suddenly wants to get out of Bella RIGHT NOW IMMEDIATELY and thrashes so violently that it shatters every bone in her body between her ribs and her femurs. Edward has to rip her uterus open with his teeth. Baby is out. It has a full mouth of teeth. It bites Bella. Edward whips out several syringes full of his own saliva and injects them into Bella all over to make her change into a vampire. This is all written in disgusting graphic detail that still makes my skin crawl to think about. I cannot fathom why Smeyer was not made to tone this scene down.
So it takes a few days for Bella to change into a vampire, during which time the Cullens (and Jacob) have to look after her hellspawn of a daughter. Jacob decides that he must kill her, because she basically killed Bella. But--- surprise! He wasn’t in love with Bella! He was in love with the eggs in her womb-- particularly this one egg that is now a baby! No more crush on Bella! No more beef with Edward! He’s just in love with a newborn infant. I am, at this point, wondering in my little 12 year old mind, how this was allowed to be published.
Bella wakes up a vampire, and in her first display of rational thought through the entire series, does not like this. Don’t worry though, that’s quickly cancelled out by her naming her baby daughter Renesmee.
Renesmee is clearly supposed to be a sweet and gifted little angel that you’re meant to love, but frankly, all I can picture is the Chucky doll but quieter. She does not talk much, because she has the ability to share thoughts by touching people’s faces. She also grows super fast. In a few days she’s toddler age. Nobody knows what the fuck is going on and nobody has time to worry about it because the vampire Illuminati found out about this (a vampire friend of the family snitched) and they’re coming to fuck up the whole family.
There is a reason why they want to do this but it’s stupid and frankly I’m not going to explain it.
So the vampires mobilize. They call all their vampire friends because their plan is just to fight the thousands-years-old vampire Illuminati over this horrible child. For some reason dozens of vampires agree to this. They’re all smitten by Resume I guess.
So the illuminati comes, the family tells them that Ramune isn’t the problem that they think she is, and they leave.
That’s it. That’s the climax.
And then everyone gets their off-putting happily ever after: Bella and Edward can now fuck as much as they want because neither of them can die. Bella abandons her human life without so much as a second glance. Resonate will physically be an adult by the time she’s 7, which means that Jacob can start fucking her then. Bella’s dad sort of knows what’s going on, but doesn’t. For some ungodly reason I don’t make a bonfire out of these books.
You may notice, if you have any knowledge of Twilight, that there are whole plots that I didn’t talk about. That’s because I’ve surely forgotten things. While I read these books with what I can only describe as a manic fervor in my youth, I could never bring myself to reread them. On God, I tried. Multiple times in the last decade I have pulled my box set, hard covered Twilight books off my shelf, and opened them up. But I never even make it through the first chapter before I am so put off that I have to put them back. The plots are flimsy. The main characters are made of sand. The secondary characters are treated like garbage. The lore is disturbing.
And yet as soon as I heard that Midnight Sun was coming out, I knew that I must read it. I’ve made it through the first chapter. I do not know when and how I will make it through the next, but I know, for little middle schooler Theo’s sake, that I must.
Twilight? Horrible. Twilight Fandom? Geniuses.
Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
19 notes · View notes
fanficaficionado · 3 years
Text
okay, i know i said i would be starting with things i knew and loved. hell, i even had a fic from the fandom im currently ass-deep in all lined up!! but then i procrastinated, and i lost motivation, got distracted by my scheduled post-holiday shutdown, and something else finally kicked my ass into gear. so this blog's first true introduction to the world will not, in fact, be a post where i worship the very ground my favorite fic writers walk upon.
no, today we are talking about Ascent into Madness by cesium_sheep
((spoilers, obviously))
Now im going to preface this by saying that this criticism is subjective and based in my opinion. I did genuinely enjoy this story, and i did not at any point feel the urge to launch myself into the sun with nothing but the pure force of my rage, causing the sun to explode and consume planet earth in a scorching hell-blast and decimating all life on our tiny little space rock, which even some of my favorites are guilty of because in some stories characters just love to waffle about ((especially in my preferred reading material which puts romance at a very significant focus)). This story just isn't for me.
I'm going to explain why, and believe me when i say i am being as gentle as i physically can with this story because it is not objectively offensive to my very being, It's a good read and setting aside the problems i have with it i enjoyed it.
I keep repeating that i don't hate this story because i do not want to be accused of baseless hate, not because of reputation or anything but because being accused of something i know i didn't do sets off the same sensation that i get from rubbing my fingernails on egg cartons, the one of the back of my brain being assaulted by the mayonnaise-coated fingers of satan himself. Damn i should really get to the criticism before this just becomes an in depth description of my very soul's adverse reaction to the cream in queen anne chocolate cherries.
anyways.
The thing about this story is that, to me, it feels.. unfinished. Or at the very least like it wandered off its intended course. It leaves me with a feeling of mild dissatisfaction and the taste of confusion in my mouth. I think this problem is best summarized by the fact that, in the first chapter, it is set up that rose is in some sort of hospital, and that dave thinks she is in the grasp of some delusion, and the second chapter sets up the retroactive explanation for how it got to this point. See, what i expected was to be caught up to that point in the story, reach that point in time again, and then progress from there.
But that first chapter?? With the hospital, the delusions, the brick through the window with the radio attached?? Never brought up again, not even once. It is completely discarded and never even thought about. The story even stops trying to set up that scene after a certain point.
To put it in homestuck terms, because i'm a loser, a time player, and come on we're talking about a homestuck fic here you know i have to do this, it feels like we started a loop and then branched off the alpha timeline so completely we aren't even a part of the metaphorical timeline-tree anymore. It nags at my brain man, it's one of the main things that fuelled my motivation in writing this. It feels lost and wandering and it confuses me in a bone deep sorta way.
The second thing that gets to me is the complete lack of information presented about what, exactly, the fuck is going on. I have no idea how we got from point A to point B, not just because it completely disconnects from point A not even halfway through, but also because there's a lot of plot threads thrown in haphazardly and then never extended upon. There's a mention of jake and john's respective guardians knowing something about the story's big bad and all the mystical bullshit that follows along behind him, but that is never followed up on even a little. No one questions why they know, despite this information being so rare that literally only two families and a single group of aliens seem to have access to it. It just is a thing and then whoops, hand musta slipped because that bad boy is out the window and is facing the combined nonexistent mercy of gravity and this ten story drop.
The main plot has this same problem, in feeling like you get just enough info to keep it going forward. There's a sword in rose's umbrella basket or whatever the hell it's called, and it's implied a future dave put it there for his past self, but do we get confirmation that it was him?? Do we see that loop completed?? No, it is just used as a driving force for rose to try and push the fact that dave's got Timey powers. It feels like i'm being pulled by the hand through this story because it only gives just barely enough information to keep this crazy train rolling and then goes so far as to leave fucking time loops hanging there incomplete which okay i might be getting a little peeved about that but can you blame me?? Can you really blame me at all??
Maybe i am judging the plot too harshly, after all i was forewarned not to read for the plot in the summary because it's pretty slow and wandering. So let's get into something else then, yes?? Let's hop to the relationships.
The relationships, too, fall prey to this complete lack of any meaningful focus on any piece of information ever. I'd swear the writer was allergic if that didn't seem too harsh a description. It's a whole lot of telling without any showing, a cardinal sin in writing. We get a conversation with kanaya that doesn't suffer the disconnect from all things that the rest of the story seems haunted by. It's actually really a neat little conversation and i find it kind of wholesome how kanaya talks about rose and i personally think this interaction to be entirely too short. Then kanaya mentions karkat and apparently there's some of davekat's standard romantic tension happening off-screen because dave starts to get flustered and ponders what that means. And once again a plot thread is thrown to the winds because we never get another whiff of it.
Actually on the topic of davekat, dave just naturally gravitates to karkat and then they're stuck together like glue, so stuck in fact that dave dies for karkat because dave apparently forgets the golden rule of "If you have time to jump in front of someone then you have time to push them out of the way" and then ignores the added bit i spitefully wrote on the ancient stone tablet of Things That Make Sense in neon orange sharpie that says "Especially if you have time to have a discussion about your choices with an ambiguously-dead girl. Pull your thumb out of your ass, dave, nobody has to die here, magic option number three was not the one you picked."
Of course, this is a fanfiction, these are characters i already know. I know how these characters would interact, i know how their relationship develops in-canon and i know that given the chance these fuckers become goddamn inseparable. But that doesn't excuse the fact that it is all tell and no show, we dont see how it gets from "You're one of the only familiar faces in a group of strangers and i am not about to start interacting with new people unless i have to" to "Here let me die heroically for you and then be revived for no explainable reason besides Because The Wizard Of God Says So." I have no reason to be invested in this or even give a half-ounce shit despite it literally becoming something that the climax hinges on. And then rose and kanaya are just inexplicably,, together?? Right at the end?? And while i am happy that the lesbians get to be in love everything is off screen and nothing is ever explained, not even like one time, and god it's just so confusing. I am so confused.
But again, maybe i'm being unfair, once again the very tags of this fic are telling me that the relationships are not the focus and only really tagged so people can filter it out. I suppose i should judge the characters, then.
From what i remember there are sixteen characters, excluding ((who i believe to be, as it is once again not explained or explicitly stated to be)) caliborn at the end, with speaking roles. Five of those characters retain any narrative relevance for more than a nanosecond. A good chunk of the trolls arent even mentioned by name, with eridan and i think sollux being mentioned, and who i think to be sollux speaks when rose and dave are first brought to the trolls' apartment but again, the fog of uncertainty clouds all things and i don't have my handy dandy leafblower on me to airblast that shit out of my way. Of the five characters with any focus on them, two are relegated to the role of supporting character, with karkat joining that number more often than not. That leaves us with dave and rose, who are ultimately as a whole unaffected by their experiences. They do not learn anything, they do not grow or change. Sure rose freaks out about her perception of reality, but that falls flat because it's more tell and no show again. Dave freaks out, as he rightfully should in this situation, but there is no arc. There is no significant change in anything but moving toward the boss fight with the big baddie.
There aren't any particularly interesting interactions between these characters, either, i cannot recall one time in which i laughed, or felt much of anything really. They all fall into a state of Existing while also feeling like they aren't doing a whole lot. It's more noticeable in retrospect but these characters just Do Not feel alive, they seem incredibly flat at times and it's hard to notice while you're reading but looking back it stands out so painfully and it makes me very sad.
If i'm not supposed to read for the plot, and i'm not supposed to read for the relationships, and i can't read for the characters, then what is this story meant to be read for?? The only other thing i can think of is the mystery and sorry pal, but that's a plot, which we have already established doesn't really have a whole lot going for it because while your mystery sure is there it is currently stinking up that rug you shoved half the answers under because those mysteries aren't the ones you want to focus on.
Is it simply meant to pass the time?? Is there no deeper purpose besides keeping yourself entertained as the hours tick by?? Because if so, it at least accomplished that. Despite its faults, it kept my attention for the entire fifty one chapters, and it passed my time.
There are other nitpicks i have, but that's more based around the writing style on a more technical level. The chapters are too short for my personal taste, and there are far too many cliffhangers, these things i will not condemn as the writer gave a good reason for the latter and obviously no writer is obligated to churn out 2,500 words per chapter unless they damn well want to.
Ultimately, this story is neither good nor bad. It is straightforward in that it burns any other plot threads besides the main one on the sacrificial alter of The Writer Does What The Writer Wants, it's a bit too ambiguous and under-explained for my tastes, but there is nothing egregiously offensive in it. It is a story that exists. I wouldn't read it again, but i wouldn't not read it again, and i don't even come close to regretting the time i spent reading it ((outside of the fact that it is currently almost nine am and i haven't slept but that one is my own fault)).
I scrolled passed this story in its beginnings, assuming it would not be particularly mindblowing, and now that i've read it i know that i was entirely correct. Read it if you want, or don't, just don't go in expecting something life changing. I suggest picking out a spot on your schedule where you have nothing to do and will no doubt be bored out of your mind. I sincerely doubt you'll regret it.
3 notes · View notes
Text
Seating plan part 9
Alix being the best bro anyone could ask for, super squad being soft, Marinette and Felix's second date, miraculous swap
Link to part 8
After Alix fails in her plan to stop Chloe from stealing Marinette's diary and exposing her feelings for Felix to the whole class (this is way before Felix and Marinette get together) using her bunnix abilities (as a now full time part time hero she gets to keep the bunny miraculous on weekdays, Mari tried to convince fu that they should just keep them full time but his wisdom is confusing, once she’s the guardian the super squad becomes permanent) she goes back to that morning and purposefully makes herself and Mari late for school in the hopes of stopping Chloe from sneaking into Marinette’s room (she forgot about Sabrina) but once she gets to school she sees Chloe put Marinette’s diary into her bag *cue menacing butterfly* Alix is then akumatised into reverser, as reverser Alix has the ability to put whoever she zaps into permanent reverse mode, for example, she zaps Sabrina and suddenly she's walking backwards out of the school and towards the Dupain-cheng bakery to put back Marinette's diary back
cue Chloe screaming for Lb while trying to avoid Reversers zaps “hurry up! get this crazy obsessed she-devil away from me this instant before I call my father” lb smugly looks to chat and says “whats her father gonna do? fire us?” chat- “or banish us from Paris? they wouldn't last 10 minutes without you bugaboo” they both laugh and go defeat Reverser 
after the Akuma is defeated Alix goes to find Mari and tells her about the diary fief, sins Mari is totally over everyone's nonsense in my au she goes straight up to Chloe and says “I believe you have something of mine” and snaches her bag to retrieve her property, alix smirks as Chloe tries to yell and Sabrina's face goes bright red “you really wanna start yelling that Marinette is stealing from you when you literally just stole from her? are you really that dumb?”
master fu holds a yoga class for all the heroes to try and teach them how to control of there emotions betterto try and avoid any more of them becoming akumatised, Alix feels like she let Ladybug and Chat down because she wasn’t strong enough to fight hawkbitches power, LB tells her “I wish I was as strong as you Bunnix, why do you think I chose you to wheeled the bunny miraculous, why do you think I chose any of you? *talking to bunnix, carapace, Ryuko, viperion and Renard Arctique (Fox Felix)* it’s because I see how strong you all are, I know I can trust all of you, you have true hearts, never doubt yourselves....but if you do just remember that I will never doubt you, i see you” “that was beautiful my lady” *cue LB fondly rolling her eyes* then they have a big group hug and they all agree they’d never be able to do any of this without her leadership CP-“and Chats unshakable faith and positivity”, master fu smiles proudly at the group
Felix and Marinette going on there the second date, Mari face-timed Alix while getting ready because “what if I choose the wrong outfit sand he decided I'm too much of fashion disaster too date? what if he decides he never wants to speak to me again because of this one wrong decision” Alix is just sat looking at her phone screen watching Mari pace around her room like *my best friend is so blind* she eventually interrupts Mari “he's gonna love whatever you wear Mari, just because it's you that's wearing it, in case you haven't noticed in Felix's eyes you can do no wrong” *cue adorable Mari blush*
for there the second date they visit the louvre and then have a picnic made by Felix, he's trying to impress Mari so he totally watched a dozen youtube tutorials on how to make perfect bread, cookie and scones, Adrian and Nathalie had to intervene before he burnt down the kitchen but with a little help he did it (Adrian definitely sent Mari photos of felix covered in flour while struggling to roll out the cookie dough) after the picnic they walk around Paris holding hands as the sun sets 
The super squad girls love patrolling together, they have races around Paris, they talk about irl stuff (leaving out anything that would reveal there identity) and give each other advice, they practice new combat moves to surprise the guys with Bun-“Chats gonna get his ass handed to him again” *evil smirk from bunnix” Ryu- “Doesn't he always” *bunnix laughing* LB-“don’t be too harsh girls *LB smirking* it’s not the guys faults were total Badasses....their all strong too, where are all amazing” Bun-“just not as amazingly strong as us” *jokingly flexing her muscles*, one of the nights the girl hero’s are patrolling together Ryuko says “do you think you’d bring any other hero’s into the tam *Kagami is thinking about a certain blue hair friend while bringing up the question* “I have a few ideas, in case of emergencies *meaning max and Kim* then both Kagami and Alix simultaneously starts thinking about how amazing it would be to have Marinette on the team
The miraculous swap is very different in my au,well technically the actual fight is basically the same its just how it happens and the villain that's different,  Sabrina is akumatised into a villain with the ability to switch people (I can’t think of a name so let’s call her the switch witch), if she hits you with her power your physical appearances stays the same but your personalities and clothes change, she switches Chloe into a quiet girl ready to follow orders, Alya turns into a snapback wearing bro, rose is now a compulsive liar in zero pink, Alix is off building a robot and Felix is in the back of the class quietly drawing Marinette (okay he’s supposed to be swapped with nath but that’s actually very on-brand for Felix...) Sabrina is akumatised after returning to school on Monday wearing a new necklace her father bought her for her birthday, Chloe green with envy, because she had her eye on that very necklace, demands Sabrina take off “that utterly ridiculous eyesore or ill be forced to end this friendship” Marinette interjects and says “why should Sabrina's choice of clothing affect your friendship” Alix-“more like dictatorship” rose “I think your necklace is lovely Sabrina” Chloe- “No, that fashion disaster is utterly ridiculous, ridiculous I say, take it off now or were over Sabrina” Sabrina runs out of the room crying, she doesn't wanna lose Chloe (the heart wants what it wants I guess...) but she loves the necklace, her dad spent so much time trying to find the perfect git, she slumps to the hallway floor crying because just once she wishes she could treat Chloe like this, see how she likes it, see how she likes feeling bossed around and made to feel small, shes then akumatised 
during the battle with akumatised Sabrina (switch witch) LB and chat get hit with her power and switch miraculous, Ladybug is now in full black and feels the sudden need to make a pun and chat Noir is suddenly hit with the bone-crushing weight of responsibility *hehe jk...but not really* its mostly similar to canon just with a different villain and a slightly different dynamic between lb and chat, after watching the disaster interview (link to part 4 for my version of prime queen) for himself he realised how blind to lb’s feelings he’s been, he stops beings as forward, he’s decided that if there soulmate’s then it will happen when it happens...he still gets jealous whenever LB and Renard are joking around though, it’s still progress I guess
Part 10
Tags-
@bamagirl513 @persephonebutkore @charlietheepic7 @7-sage-7 @spicybelladonna @akana-sama
Edit- designs of Alix and Sabrina akumatised link here
107 notes · View notes
iheardarumorxxx · 4 years
Text
Midnight Sun, Chapter 5 - Invitations
This chapter opens up with Weirdo doing what he does best, whining.
In particular, he’s whining this time about how school is hell. Oh, it’s not boring anymore, not just a coma that he has to suffer through to appear normal, but actual genuine hell. He has to be around Bella all the time, you see. He has to exist in the same space as her and it is just misery and woe.
Except, and this is a point that I was going to make back in chapter one when Jasper was doing his freaky little spazz thing about all the tasty good hoomans around them, the Cullens don’t actually HAVE to suffer through the inane slog of Forks High. Think about it for a second. As far as anyone in town knows, Carlisle is a respected doctor (Dr. Kevorkian, but so far he hasn’t been that bad here), and Esme is a soft delicate happy homemaker mama. So why the fuck do they bother going to the public high school? Why would it be out of the realm of posibility to say that Esme home-schools the kids? It keeps them away from the teenagers who could be in very real danger having a bunch of Pire classmates, and it literally leaves them to their own devices. If they wanna spend a week up in Alaska (Weirdo) then no one is going to be the wiser, because they live on the edge of town and the only one with any actual ties to the community at large is Dr, Carlisle. 
Maybe they do it because they get bored just being around one another all the time. But everything we’ve seen in the text tells us that even at school, they only hang out with each other and go out of their way to avoid the rest of the school population. It tracks as yet another selfish thing that the Cullens are doing, putting the teenagers of Forks High at risk because they wanna go to normal school, even though they don’t have to.
I’m not even a paragraph in and I just ranted for two. This chapter recap might be a long one, guys.
I'd comforted myself with the fact that her pain would be nothing more than a pinprick - just a tiny sting of rejection - compared to mine.
This is one of those lines that SM uses to hammer home the fact that her Pires are OH SO MUCH better than you. It’s such a blatant ‘Oh, my pain and sorrow and misery is just SO BAD compared to Bella with her weak human mind and weak human emotions. She couldn’t possibly be as hurt as I, the great Edward Cullen, am.’ And it’s trash. It hasn’t been overt enough yet, but there’s still a rant coming about vampire instincts, with which I hope to point out exactly how this sentiment is wrong. 
If I was destined to love her
This is one of the main reasons why I just don’t buy the love story aspect of this series. They never talk about love in anything but ‘fate’ and ‘destiny’. Love is hard work. It’s building mutual respect and trust for one another and learning little quirks and habits along the way. It’s bumpy and messy and gross and wonderful, and most of all, it’s a choice. A choice to get to know someone, to spend time with that person and understand their hopes and dreams and wants and needs and fears and all of it, but in Twilight, it feels like the choice is taken away. Alice with her magic future power divines that Weirdo and Bella are gonna be in love, and instead of Eddie boy taking note that he barely even knows Bella, and has spent the better part of the few weeks he’s had with her making wild assumptions about who she is and what she’s like, he just goes ‘Ope, well, I guess if the future says I love her, I love her’ and that’s it. And the worst part is, even after their relationship actually begins, they don’t even try to do that getting to know and trust and respect one another thing, they just flat out keep their wild assumptions about one another throughout the entire series and rely on this ever subjective future that Alice has seen.
Wow, I’m ranting a lot today in this one. I’m not even a third of the way into this chapter yet.
Who would have ever dreamed that such a generic, boring mortal could be so infuriating?
We’re shitting on Mike Newton again, and I have to point something out yet again. Eddie, baby, sweety. You are outright ignoring Bella and treating her like she doesn’t matter in the slightest to you. You stated just before this that you were going out of your way to outwardly ignore her, even while you obsess over her in your mind. You have given only the outward indication of, if not outright disdain, then at the very least indifference to this girl and yet you’re giving Mike shit for having a crush on a girl and actually fucking acting on it. He talks to her, he attempts poorly to flirt with her and ask her out, even though we all know that she’s just as obsessed with you and compares Mike to a dog (because Bella is a piece of shit, too, so at least you have that in common). So stop shitting on poor Mike, who’s only crime is liking a girl who isn’t interested in him.
He'd created a Bella in his head that didn't exist
WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU’VE FUCKING DONE, EDWARD. And honestly? Yours is even worse because you don’t even BOTHER trying to FUCKING TALK TO HER TO GET TO KNOW HER. You just spy on her conversations with other people and assume that you know everything about her! Bella goes out of her way to put on this fake little show for her classmates and lie to them about everything she feels and thinks about them, but at least they FUCKING TALK TO HER! So yeah, I agree, Mike doesn’t have the full picture of who Bella really is (and if he did, he absolutely would not still have that little crush on her because Bella is a big fucking jerk), but at least they’re MAKING THE EFFORT!
Bella was good.
This is just not true and I have four books worth of canon to prove it.
I frequently amused myself by imagining backhanding him across the room and into the far wall...
“It helps if you think of them as people.” Remember that, Eddie??? Now here’s the thing. We’ve all had those fantasies about people. Wanting to throw them across the room or punch them in the face or whatever. The difference here? Edward is well aware that his Magic Pire Strength would genuinely hurt Mike, so much so that the very next line is about how it ‘probably’ wouldn’t hurt him fatally. Meaning that Eddie is well aware that it would hurt him, probably even break a few bones, but hey, he probably won’t die! Fuck you, Edward.
For all I knew, she never thought about me at all.
Pointedly gonna look over at Twilight now and see just how fucking much Bella is obsessing over Eddie, to the point where any thought not centered around her Woobie Pire is glossed over and ignored.
Eddie is having a jealous baby fit and once again thinking about how he would just love to hurt poor Mike for having the gall and audacity to ask Bella out. I already ranted about it up there, and I’m too tired and annoyed to do it again. Just know that Edward is a fucking asshole and poor Mike doesn’t deserve any of the shit that gets forced on him in this series.
Eddie is finally paying attention to Bella again, and wondering what she’s thinking, and he does that a lot in this book. I know that it’s supposed to be because he’s relied on his shitty vampire super power for so long, but considering how often he demanded (yes, demanded) to know what she was thinking in canon, and wouldn’t let up until she caved and told him, it feels like he’s trying to monitor her thoughts. She can’t be thinking anything that Daddy Ed doesn’t approve of, after all.
I picked the correct answer out of his head
But the Cullens are just super smart and know things and definitely aren’t cheating cheaters who cheat to get perfect grades in school.
"Are you speaking to me again?"
This is a problem with this canon. These people have had TWO conversations. In one of them, it was banal and inane small talk about the fucking weather and why Bella moved to Forks, and in the other, Eddie was gaslighting her to make her think she was wrong about what happened in the Van Of Doom(tm) crash. They haven’t talked like, at all. They don’t know anything about one another besides what they’ve crafted in their own empty heads. Bella is obsessing about how Eddie must hate her and Eddie is obsessing about how this version of Bella he’s built up in his head must be so amazing and wonderful and touting about how he loves her. There isn’t love in this relationship. There isn’t even a relationship. These people are obsessed stalkers.
I managed not to laugh.
This is another example of Edward being just... the biggest fucking jerk. Clearly, Bella is upset. She’s jumped to the wrong conclusion, and assumes that Eddie just wants her to fucking die or whatever, but she’s clearly upset and annoyed and Eddie is treating her feelings like a joke. He does that so often in the series, but hearing it from his own perspective really drives it home. 
Edward is being extremely shallow watching Eric and Tyler asking Bella out. He makes a rude comment about Eric’s skin (he’s a teenage boy with acne, oh GOD) and outright calls Tyler ‘average’ as if he knows anything about him. This is another problem with Ed and his magic surface thought listening power. I’ve already pointed out that he’s created this image of who Bella is in his head based on absolutely nothing, but he’s done this with everyone around him. He assumes what kind of people they are based on the very bare, surface thoughts they have. He doesn’t consider the people around him complex, because he isn’t diving into their more complex thoughts and emotions, and that’s just so gross and shitty.
How was I any better than some sick peeping tom?
We know what this is, right? We’re witnessing the birth of Eddie breaking into Bella’s house and watching her sleep. He’s once again acknowledging that he shouldn’t be doing it, and he knows that its wrong, so of course, that means he can just keep on doing it anyway. 
I was not the one she was destined to say yes to.
This is such a ham-fisted attempt at keeping the ‘will they won’t they’ illusion up, because its been made so obvious from the word GO that there’s never going to be anyone else for Bella. Even the attempt at a love triangle doesn’t work in the series because SM made it so clear all throughout New Moon that Bella would never choose Jacob if Edward was a choice. Everything she did in New Moon was to keep the illusion of Edward up in her mind, and even spending time with Jacob was a means to that end goal. Its not a compelling love story because, as stated, there is no love here because they haven’t spoken to one another, but their sick, driving obsession with one another is going to guide them all the way to the end. Edward and Bella are not a good couple, and I wish very much that that line up there was the truth, and that Bella discovered who she was as a person and found someone to compliment her.
My life was an unending, unchanging midnight. It must, by necessity, always be midnight for me. So how was it possible that the sun was rising now, in the middle of my midnight?
Left that full for context. This is our title drop, and as someone who has read all of Twilight, who has seen all of the horrible title drops in them, I honestly think this one might be the worst of them all. It’s just this affected way that SM writes and it really, really irks me to see it so blatantly on display combined with a ‘hee hee, Midnight Sun, get it~’ on top of it.
My self, also, had frozen as it was - my personality, my likes and my dislikes, my moods and my desires; all were fixed in place.
This has a lot of implications for the Pires that SM never even bothers to explore because she doesn’t actually realize the potential in it. According to canon, right there in that sentence, when they’re turned Pires STOP CHANGING. They don’t develop new interests or hobbies, they don’t change their taste in music, film, anything. They become truly frozen in time. That means that the Cullens should not be driving cars, or wearing the clothes that they wear. They should not have picked up all of these skills that immortality has allowed them to pick up. The should be the exact same as they were the day they were turned. There’s something really dark and genuinely heartbreaking about that, and a better author would have explored it. Unfortunately, we don’t have a better author.
if I were going to attempt any kind of relationship with her
Edward refuses to take into account that that is not solely his decision to make. Pretend for a second that Bella is a normal human with normal thoughts. All she has seen of Eddie is this hot and cold thing were he does a nice thing or has a nice conversation with her and then ices her out for days and weeks at a time. He is, by all accounts, a total jerk and kind of a weirdo. Why the hell would she (again, if she were a normal, rational person) want a relationship with him?
Strange, unfamiliar reactions stirred deep in my forgotten human core.
AKA, Eddie just felt the first stirrings of being a horny teenage boy. Gross. 
The chapter ends on Eddie asking Bella to let him drive her to Seattle. I know I’ve already made this point, but if Bella were a normal teenage girl experiencing all of this shit from Eddie, she would have absolutely laughed in his face and told him to go fuck himself on a cactus or something. He’s proven to be volitale, rude, condescending, and just an outright jerk. There is no reason a sane, rational person would want to go anywhere with him. Would want to spend any time alone with him. If anything, Bella should be thinking that Eddie wants to get her alone to murder her or something based on the way he’s acting. It’s creepy and weird. Bella, unfortunately, eats this shit up and is so excited about her date with him. 
That’s it. Chapter over. Sorry this was such a long one, folks, but I’m not sure they’re gonna get any shorter. This story makes me angry, and when I get angry, I rant. Feel free to reach out in messages or DMs if you wanna chat more about this book or offer suggestions for the next one I should do after I finally put this one to bed. 
You can also buy me a snack if you want, I have my CashApp tag in my bio. Until next time. 
4 notes · View notes
tfw-no-tennis · 4 years
Text
hunty movie 1
sooo ruth and i watched the first hxh movie holla
me as soon as we’re done w/the yorknew arc: OH FUCKY ITS ANIME MOVIE TIME
i love anime movies. theyre so often Entertaining As Hell, and also Not Very Good. its a very fun intersection 
overall this movie slots pretty easily into that category. it was a good time but nothing revolutionary. which is ok! and that makes sense bc its not canon apparently 
this movie was basically the ‘killua and kurapika have Trauma(tm)’ movie lmao 
we open w/killua having a trauma dream abt illumi, rehashing the stuff we saw in the hunter exam arc....we see this a few more times in the movie, and it really drives home how killua is still rlly scared of illumi and kinda just goes into a dissociative trauma state whenever illumi is around (even fake doll illumi or dream illumi, in this movie). poor kid :( :( 
regrettably tho ruth and i agree that illumis outfit in this movie was pretty sexy 
ok that whole beginning part where kurapikas eyes get stolen happens SO fast hvbfhdjshfsk its like ok guess thats the status quo for this movie!
jesus poor kurapika. they cant catch a fuckgin break huh
also that kid was totally the kid that was alluded to by kurapika at the end of the yorknew arc...so i guess that was included in the anime as a setup for this movie? 
also apparently that stuff was based off of a short story thing the author did a while ago which is p cool
leorios terrible drawing skills is hvhbjsdfbsdfngsjkdf
also leorio is so tender w/kurapika hhhhhhh im gonna die. im gonna gay die
and gon and killua are just. tiny soulmate boyfriends ok 
ah yes i see the obligatory movie original character who befriends the protag
it kinda cracks me up how hostile killua is to retz like vhbhskhdfbaj i get that its bc of Trauma and his fear of betrayal/betraying but it also reads as killua being a Jealous Gay which is kinda hilarious 
ruth and i when hisoka shows up: [prolonged annoyed groaning and dismayed yelling]
hisoka literally just shows up to sow chaos and throw around information to stir shit up huh
of COURSE the villain is the former 4th spider thats like. easy choice lmao 
it might just be the fansubs but i feel like there were strong implications that hisoka and 4th spider guy fucked bhjdfashfdjnakn
the most unbelievable thing abt this whole thing is that hisoka didnt kill that doll guy lmao 
ohhh shit its uvo
OHHH SHIT NOBUNGA AND MACHI....its so bad but i really like the troupe members and when they show up im like !!!!!!!
machi is so cooooool
aughhhh its like....i feel bad for nobunga for having to face down uvo like this....and THEN when pakunoda shows up too :( and nobunga tells her doll ‘rest in peace now’ or something when he cuts her down....oof. but also like theyre evil murderers so im!?! conflicted?!?!
also the shadow beast guys that uvo killed showing up and then proceeding to do LITERALLY NOTHING was kinda hilarious
and damn so technically the troupe is on the same side as the main crew, what with all of them wanting to wreck omokages shit
also omokage looks like sephiroth lmaoooo 
ill be honest i barely know what sephiroth looks like but ruth said this and i felt in my bones that its true 
ok i gotta talk abt the kurapika backstory stuff bc OUUGHGHGHGHGH my fucking UWUS BITCH!!!!
seeing a bunch of kurta was sad....and seeing baby-er kurapika OUGH and also pairo is sooo cute and him and kurapikas friendship is so pure 
kurapika is so different :( theyre like, so much more innocent and excitable....thats so damn sad bro wtf 
pairo pulling some slick moves swapping that little potion thing - all while using his blindness as a cover - was so good...no wonder he and kurapika get along so well 
also gotta say its even more brutal that one of the main reasons kurapika didnt get Big Murdered w/the rest of the kurta is bc pairo pulled this stunt - if he hadnt, kurapika wouldve failed the test and never would have left 
also kurapika saying theyre gonna find someone who can help w/pairos eyes ;_; the similarities w/leorios backstory/motivation makes me die 
and seriously im still caught up at how innocent and pure kp is oooof ough 
tho still defs the kurapika we know....theyve seemingly always had a temper, what with the reaction to the dudes in the market 
like, kurapika did NOT hold back...even after finding out that they were just part of the test! tho i do get it bc they insulted pairo...kurapika’s love for their friends/stalwart need to defend their friends is clearly a big thing 
also the market people’s reaction to seeing kp’s red eyes is rlly interesting to me...are the kurta like, known to anybody? or are they more of a vaguely talked-about group that like, ‘probably exists’? or is it that people know abt them but not the red eyes thing? it seems like these people, if any, would know, bc this market is seemingly a day’s travel from where the kurta live....i want more kurta lore bro!!
i big love pairo helping kurapika cheat like that....such an interesting twist, and makes it obvious that theirs is a friendship of equals 
anyways i loved that flashback stuff and it just drives home how absolutely fucked up and horribly sad kurapikas whole existence is, especially in this movie w/pairo’s doll being used against them
n e ways back to the non flashback stuff
i love that gon’s super nose returned for this movie omg 
im just auhghghghgh gon and killua know each other so well uwu....
aaaand illumi (well, doll illumi) is back to fuck shit up for poor killua
ugh it still gets me how clearly terrified of illumi killua is...we dont really see him act like this any other time :( and the fact that doll-illumi was able to scare killua enough to get him to run away and leave gon behind (albeit briefly) was oof 
gon jumping in front of killua and getting his eyes stolen instead....baby boyyyy oughhh
also can i just say thank fuck they didnt replace illumis eyes w/gons bc THAT wouldve been some serious nightmare fuel lmao 
cant believe killua then ran away again and walked emo-ly on the train tracks 
and THEN he saw a train coming and was like oh well :( guess ill die :/ JESUS KID 
but gon w/his Big Sniff Powers comes to the rescue!!
it was so cute how gon told killua that killua didnt run and abandon him - they were working together to fight :’) gon understands killua so well 
i love how the squad then squads up to fight omokage...with half of them being blind lmao 
and in the half that isnt blind is leorio, who STILL doesnt know nen, and literally brings a knife to a nen fight 
i totally saw the whole ‘retz is a doll and her older brother is omokage, and retz actually died a while ago’ thing coming lol but still, not bad
all omokage does is talk abt the beauty of his dolls or w/e like ENOUGH bro 
kurapika fighting pairo and killua fighting illumi (AGAIN) was all so fucked up they shouldve switched opponents for less trauma oof 
and poor leorio is literally no help vhhvdijfhjbashkj he just gets throw around this whole time
kurapikas fight against pairo was sad bc it was such a fucked up situation...kp did gr8 tho, i liked them saying that this isnt the real pairo, cause pairo would never say/do these things. still and extremely sucky situation to be in! 
meanwhile its the gon and killua vs doll-illumi rematch...and this illumi is like, a version of illumi drawn from killuas mind/heart (or something idk, it was kinda glossed over which i understand), which means that hes extra scary and focused on telling killua how much hes just a mindless killing machine who cant have friends 
but luckily we have gon here to help snap killua out of his trauma haze, which certaintly wasnt the case at the hunter exam - so it was kinda nice to see how things went w/gon around :’) they work so well together oughhhhh....and they love each other so much broo gay preteen love real 
hisoka just fuckgin materializing in the house place to help sow more chaos....unbelievable 
me: i bet hisoka wont want to fight doll chrollo bc its not The Same as real chrollo 
ruth: no i think he will bc hes a whore 
hisoka: [fights doll chrollo] 
me: oh shit u right 
kurapika: ok omogake its time for you to FUCKING DIE- 
and then killua stops them and says that he’ll do it, be he doesnt want kurapika to kill anymore :( :( :( bro im sooo fucking sad. killua rlly b out here thinking that hes already too far gone to matter when it comes to murder, but he doesnt want his friends to end up like that, so he might as well take on that burden, because whats one more person’s death on his hands? (EVEN THO HE SAID HE DIDNT WANT TO KILL ANY MORE...but theres exceptions when it comes to saving your friend’s souls and whatnot) :( :( AUGHHH
but luckily retz comes THRU with some good ole fratricide
killua: [takes notes]
the fact that the phantom troupe just fuckgin shows up and is like oh hey its you guys. this casual enemy stuff kills me lmao i love it 
then they just fuckgin LEAVE and theyre like welllll we cant rlly fight u bc of chrollo’s state so by i guess. its NOT On Sight but someday it will be! YOU TOO HISOKA DONT THINK WE FUCKIGN FORGOT ABOUT YOU. 
dramatic house burning! and rip retz, saw that one comin tho 
when they all went thru and said their life goals and then killua was like shit i dont have a cool definitive anime goal LMAOOOO
but THEN gon said his goals should be to stay by gon’s side UHMMM???? baby gays AUGHHHHH and killua is just like lovestruck AUGHHHH 
Gays Win 
then they all peace out to resume the next arc lmaoooo
and then we see flashes of other characters, like the blonde girl (who ruth and i totally thought retz was, seeing thumbnails from this movie....we were like w8 hasnt that girl not been introduced yet??? lmao)
we also see some dude w/long hair and a hat who ive never seen before but ruth went OHHH ITS SCYTHE GUY!!! so i guess hes gonna b important?? lol 
and then we saw chrollo....still in the same place the squad left him vbhajfdjkahsbfkdjabhsukfdj CAN HE NOT GET DOWN FROM THERE W/OUT NEN OR AN AIRSHIP??? THATS SO FUCKING FUNNYYYYYY ARE YOU KIDDING ME 
general thots:
so this was very much an Anime Movie, in that they cant like, advance to plot or develop the characters much, bc its a movie. and this one is non canon
it was enjoyable but i do feel like it was much more typical shounen then hxh usually is...like, i feel like this was made by the same people who make like, the naruto movies or w/e, and w/the same sort of approach/attitude 
this isnt necessarily bad - i LIKE shounen for a reason - but it was a bit noticeable bc it wasnt quite as smart as hxh is usually, and it rehashed a lot of stuff weve already seen in this show itself 
but still i think it did a good job w/what it had, and it had some good angst, and everyone was very gay which is good
the art style was SLIGHTLY wack but it wasnt as bad as i thought itd be 
overall a fun time like most anime movies. didnt reinvent the wheel but i had a good time. im excited for the greed island arc, and im also disproportionately excited to watch the hxh musical bc that is a thing that exists and i MUST see it asap bc that sounds like the kind of hilarious wackiness that appeals to me specifically
so thats it...later! 
1 note · View note
jlf23tumble · 5 years
Note
Fic rec anon here, I just read through your AU recs, and I need more, holy hell!? Do you have a similar list for canon fics? What are your favourite genres? You're one of the brave souls who posts about mpreg...what other kinks do you recommend?
Yessssssssss, a chance to do part two of my prison 25, fuck yeah!!! I edited this canon rec list down, and Jesus, that’s the hardest part of it. Luckily, I can save a lot of ‘em in other categories--and I have recs in just about any category, so lemme know if anything in particular floats your boat (I tend to bookmark/save in collections like mpreg, a/b/o, omorashi, daddy, toys, panties, phone sex, dirty talk, etc., but yeah, I can hook you up with allll kinds of fic, god bless the ao3 bookmark feature). 
I’ll put the full list under the cut, in length order...in lots of cases, the author has done many, MANY more, so I’ll highlight that, too! Enjoy! (Oh, and check out the postscript at the end, too...a lot of these are older, but if you want newer, just give me your parameters/needs, and I’ve gotcha, bb)
Hello, Heaven (you are tunnel-lined with yellow lights), by objectlesson, 2.9k words (E). Or, Louis buys Harry things sometimes.  (LISSSSSSSSSSSSSTEN, read every single fic Phoenix ever wrote, jfc, she’s so good, the stories are so good, and this particular one was a gift to me, so I’m biased, but it combines a lot of my fave kinks into one. I edited most of her stories in this fandom, which means I literally can’t pick a fave, they’re my step-children, but this one is noice)
so wicked in the way he moves, by ballsdeepinjesus, 3.6k words (E). Harry and Louis are parents at football practice. (don’t be scared; no kids, just hot van sex and banter, and this author EXCELS at sex/banter, so lots of gold here)
She Feels So Good, by zedi, 4.1k words (E). Louis knows that voice. Harry’s used that voice in his ear more times than Louis can count, said such sweet, naughty things while popping a hip out and pressing up against Louis. That’s the voice that comes out when Harry’s in a skirt, nails done and gestures soft and flirty. (Jumpsuit Harry on the Late Late Show)
like poison coursing through me, by orphan_account, 4.1k words (E). The one with copious dirty talk, Daddy Louis, and Harry wetting himself in the shower. (pee kink, but honestly, give it a try...it’s about desperation, and it’s so hot)
took me by the wrist, by tomlinzn, 4.2k words (E). harry's twenty-one; louis still loves him. there's birthday sex. (Hima’s legacy, god, it’s beautiful)
Take a Chance, Just Feed Me, by yeah_alright, 4.3k words (E). Louis needs some time alone with Marcel, and he’s hoping Harry will play along. (MARCEL COSPLAY)
Fertile Ground, by Blake, 4.4k words (E). Or, Harry doesn’t know what comes first: the lies that shape his want, or his want, which shapes the lies. He only knows that there’s lies, and want. And Louis, of course. (ANOTHER GOD-TIER PERSON TO READ EVERYTHING THEY’VE EVER WRITTEN, and this one has a big ole dose of angst, but it’s so fucking goooood, so real, sob)
You Don’t Need Me to Show You the Way, by LoadedGunn, 6.5k words (E). Or, 2011 fic where Harry rides dick for the first time and Louis appreciates technology. (X Factor era, and I think this was the fic that made me create a whole technology tag, lmaoooo)
Only Thing That Can Quench My Thirst, by eyesofshinigami, 6.5k words (E). Louis wouldn't exactly call it a thing, his newfound fascination with the curly trail that starts below Harry's bellybutton and disappears into his skinny jeans. It's definitely not a thing. It's just... Alright, maybe it's a thing. (the entire reason for pubefest2020, tbh, this is such a fave fic, sigh)
domesticated, by sky_reid, 6k words (E). nothing gets harry going quite like mentioning a marriage licence. (fluffy but still hot five times story)
Agent Provocateur, by orphan_account, 7k words (E). Harry looks like he's constantly about to drop into subspace when he's talking to Louis onstage. (you can kinda guess from the title, but this is panties panties panties, plus more)
let the only sound be the overflow, by sarcasticfluentry, 7.6k words (E; needs ao3 account). Harry and Louis explore new kinks while staying in Tokyo. (another AMAZING author, check out the rest of their fics; this one’s based on a specific video--read the notes--and you’ll never see Louis, Harry, or clothespins the same way again)
little black dress (it’s all right), by istajmaal, 8k words (E). harry is a girl sometimes. louis loves her all the time. (this one’s part of an ahead-of-its-time series featuring genderfluid harry)
horizontal like a quarter to three, by orphan_account, 8k words (E). The worst part is that Louis just wants to get really rough with him. He's wanted it right from the start, and it doesn't make sense, because Harry's always been so gentle and understanding and sweet, and yet all Louis wants to do is fuck him up. (some serious kink exploration nicely done)
give you my fever, by beautlouis @thelovejandles, 10k words (E). x-factor era. harry's never had an orgasm before, louis gives him his first (it is as it says, and it is INCREDIBLY hot/well done, as is everything beautlouis has ever written, immediately finish this one and then go read everything else)
shit, i still love you (still see you in my bed), by wankerville, 10.9k words (E). it's valentine's day and harry wants to be fucked in his gold boots. (another author I adore!!! this one is as it says, and wow, so visual)
Let Me Be Good for You, by onlyhuman, 11.9k words (E). Niall's only birthday wish is to go clubbing with his boys in Vegas. Harry ruins it all by wearing that god forsaken black sheer shirt. (I love some good hair-related porn!! This one features the bun, sigh)
Autumn at My Window, by TheCellarDoor, 20.4k words (E). a lot of pining, Louis' addiction to Harry's scent, and a whole lot of sexual tension that might just snap loose when they decide to spend some time together all on their own. (this is one of those canon-compliant AUs where you’re meant to ignore A LOT, but it’s still a good lil story with a lot of pining)
Maybe I Miss You series, by 13ways, 26k words (E).  Louis is on his way back to London after the Hits Live Birmingham concert. Harry is flying to New York for the Met Gala. They connect. (a newer series that does a good job of weaving in all kinds of real emotion for an ultimately happy ending)
Nothing You Can Do (But You Can Learn How to Be You in Time), by Teumessian, 28k words (E; needs ao3 account). Louis braids Harry’s hair. There are good times, bad times, fancy houses, supportive bandmates, secret boyfriends, small rebellions, bigger revolutions, some nail varnish, ribbons, cute clothing, and a Pinterest. (THE PINTEREST FIC!!!! and another admittedly canon-compliant semi-AU...but then again, most of them are, right?? idk, idk, i just know this one’s very visual and oh so soft)
(your heartbeat) rang true inside my bones, by flimsy, 32.9k words (E). Harry goes as Louis' date for a weekend wedding. He ends up taking the role a bit too seriously. (touch o angst, but it kind of is as it says)
Drifting, Weightless, by @dinosaursmate, 41k words (E). Harry and Louis are exes with benefits until they're not, and the Mediterranean Sea might just be the perfect place to work through some unresolved issues. (this is actually a really funny one, in addition to being emotional and hot, plus I for one would take a One Direction cruise when they get back together in 15 years, sob)
the dark and the dentist, by sunshiner, 66.2k words (E). An account of the events of November 2014. (there are actually a few really big monster fics/series that cover this particular time, but I occasionally skim this one because I like the flashes of random domesticity)
To the Ends of the Earth, by stylinsoncity, 68.4k words (E). During a yearlong hiatus, Louis visits Harry at his cabin in Idaho, where long-buried feelings ignite like the fire keeping them warm. (THE IDAHO CABIN FIC!! And if you haven’t read it in a while, check out the new epilogue from earlier this year...or buy the whole thing on Amazon! Another great one that’s emotional, angsty, soft, and hot, all in one snowball)
Untangle Me, by suicxne, 100k words (E). The one where Harry and Louis finally get it right. (this is another one where you have to ignore A LOT, but it’s like reading a beautiful movie, jesus, I’m still so weak for this fic!! One of the first ones I read in this fandom, and I still randomly think of it every now and again)
Obviously, lots of old and gold here, but that’s because it’s the canon all stars, or whatever...I love a TON of newer fic for all kinds of reasons, so if you need some recs, say the word!
26 notes · View notes
frasier-crane-style · 5 years
Text
Let’s talk about Treks baby
Tumblr media
The One Where Riker Stars In The Grey.
When Riker is reassigned to go over a terraforming colony bedeviled by pesky, genetically engineered wolves, a new first officer is assigned to the Enterprise. And he’s kwazy.
The irritatingly named Quintin Stone is sort of the Nick Locarno to Peter David’s later Mackenzie Calhoun. Brooding rogue, troubled past, gets the job done, you know how it goes. It’s a pretty unabashed power fantasy/Mary Sue in New Frontier, but there the whole thing is so over the top and tongue in cheek that you really can’t take it too seriously. Quintin, on the other hand, is more played for drama--for most of the story, there’s a question as to whether he’s outright homicidally insane. Luckily, Troi is on top of things, checking on his mental well-being and also kinda being his love interest, like a literal version of this gif.
Tumblr media
Spoiler alert: It turns out he’s deeply traumatized by a not wholly believable incident in his past*, so good on ya for catching that one, Troi. 
Looking back on it, this book would almost seem to count as a deconstruction of the ‘broody antihero’ trope, showing that the character type just doesn’t work in TNG. He infuriates most of the cast and doesn’t get the girl, while those who are taken in by him are presented as saps (yup, Wesley). 
Speaking of New Frontier, with the self-aware jokeyness and tongue-in-cheek acknowledgment of Trek’s campier elements, would it be fair to say PAD was ahead of the curve in predicting the modern incarnation of Trek? Its take on Star Trek would definitely fit in with the Kelvinverse movies and especially with The Orville, which is pretty much the people’s choice for Trek these days.
*Okay, I get the interpretation of the Prime Directive as not interfering or revealing yourself to alien cultures until they develop warp drive, at which point they’re going to figure out you’re there anyway. And if you can stop an asteroid from wiping them out without them knowing about it, fine. Cool. I get that. But I don’t get Star Trek stories where the PD means you can’t interfere with the Romulans’ development, even though they’re showing up on your doorstep every other week and shooting at you. It’s like saying if Hitler 2.0 showed up in Germany and started amassing power, the US shouldn’t try to discourage that shit or, I guess, engage in any diplomacy whatsoever. It’s mindbogglingly isolationist. And isn’t it arguable that part of a culture’s natural development is interacting with other cultures? Like the back and forth between America and Japan driving forward the medium of animation?
Tumblr media
The One Where Picard Nearly Bangs Guinan’s Sister
This one has a bit of nontroversy attached to it, because it came out while Star Trek was still kind of hashing out the Borg, so there’s a disclaimer at the beginning basically going
Tumblr media
The gist of it is that Borg aren’t supposed to have gender (a bunch of people with blue hair just had their ears perk up, didn’t they?), but PAD here has a drone that gets detached from the Collective and is a girl. It seems pretty self-evident to me--Picard gets assimilated, they get him back, he’s still a dude, so why wouldn’t it work that way with a chick? But this is back when assimilation wasn’t the Borg’s m.o. the way it would later become. They assimilate a Ferengi in this book (yup) and it’s kind of a big deal. Oh, and as you might’ve guessed, Girl Borg bears a few similarities to Seven of Nine, who would show up later in the franchise, although PAD’s take on it is more “we rescued a girl from a serial killer’s basement after ten years and she’s totally catatonic,” less “what is this human emotion you call ‘kissing’?”
Good thing we have Deanna Troi, a counselor, to ease Girl Borg through the healing process. Oh, wait, she basically takes one look at GB and goes
Tumblr media
Thanks for the help, Troi. I guess this subplot is supposed to prove that it’s pointless to try to save any assimilated person other than Picard, because mentally they’re already dead, so might as well just have a bunch of fun guiltlessly blowing them away
Tumblr media
(And that goes for you too, audience.) But still, bit of a downer. At least Spock would’ve tried a mind-meld.
There’s also this chick Delcara, who in a pretty XXtra Flamin' Hot narrative choice is like Picard’s soulmate and he’s sort of in love with her slash obsessed with her after having a psychic vision of her in Starfleet Academy and y’know? TNG might’ve opened the door to this by having Crusher bang a ghost, but we should close that door. We should close it right now.
(By the way, in case you’re wondering if this Guinan’s sister business means Picard is down with the swirl, it turns out she’s Guinan’s adopted sister, so is it just me or is that weirdly ambiguous? She’s a beautiful black woman and Picard wants to do her. You can come out and say it, book. No one minds.)
Anyway, Delcara is piloting one of dem planet-killers from back in TOS--in hindsight, it’s weird that the Abrams movies never did anything with the one big Death Star-y thing that actually is canon to TOS, isn’t it? They gave Khan and Nero ridiculously super-sized ships, but the one kaiju that’s actually in continuity, nothing--on a vendetta against the Borg, who basically killed her family twice over. Man, if only there were some kind of psychologist on board the Enterprise to help her through that trauma.
Tumblr media
I sense she feels great bitterness, Captain.
Yeah, why does she get a seat next to the Captain again? Let Worf have that seat. How is it fair that he has to stand around all day, he actually does stuff!
Anyhoo, as you might’ve guessed from the opening set on a holographic rendition of Don Quixote, with a Data Discussion(tm) of quixotic endeavors... and the fact that Delcara intends to totally wipe out the Borg, gosh, I wonder if she’ll succeed--this one’s something of a downer. It does give the promised Planet Killer on Borg Cube action for those fanboys who’ve wondered who would win in a wrassling match, and Picard learns a valuable lesson about not pursuing suicidal vendettas against the Borg, which he definitely takes to heart...
Tumblr media
(Wow, he did that one-handed? What kind of gains does Sir Patrick have?)
But still... bit depressing.
Tumblr media
The One Where Bones Becomes A Space Pirate
Another giant novel, I’m surprised this one never got raided for parts in any adaptation. Even on the page, it’s pretty breathtakingly cinematic, and yet, the only part of it that’s really been used is, if you squint, Bob Burnham in Discovery being a disgraced Starfleeter.
The premise is that, some months ago, the TOS Enterprise crew was involved in a breaking of the Prime Directive that resulted in the destruction of a world and the ‘Enterprise 5′ of bridge officers blamed for the tragedy being shunned and hated wherever they go (ah, that utopian Star Trek future, predicting an entire population that’s politically engaged). 
Now, with the command crew scattered, everyone’s trying to get back to the planet where it all happened to find out what tf went down for reals. In a bit of a stretch, this is really hard for them--no one seems to be able to call in a favor or hire Han Solo to take them there or anything, which I suppose is in keeping with Star Trek 3′s similar situation six years prior. They don’t have to go so far as to steal a Constitution-class this time. I suppose it’s fitting for the wild and woolly TOS era. In TNG time, they’d probably be able to dial a Space Uber. (As it turns out, it seems like if they’d just coordinated their plans, they all could’ve hitched a ride with Spock, but then there’d be no book, much less a Giant Book.)
Anyway, Kirk’s been court-martialed and is working as an asteroid miner, Chekov and Sulu fall in with Orion pirates, Spock is challenging the whole thing in court, and Uhura’s in jail........oh. It’s like that, huh, Starfleet?
Tumblr media
Like I said, most of the plot involves the crew going off on all their separate adventures, eventually getting the band back together and figuring out what went down. Apparently, the book was criticized for its nonlinear structure, but I think it worked out really well. Starting months after the incident, with everyone disgraced, gets you pumped to find out what happened. Then when they flashback to the shit going down, there’s a great sense of foreboding because you know something is going to happen, just not what exactly. 
If I can make a criticism, it’s that after some great build-up, the ending seems a bit anticlimactic. The nature of the threat requires some unbelievable Hollywood Evolution to buy (nothing new for Star Trek, admittedly, and this is a crew that’s fresh off meeting Apollo and Abraham Lincoln) and while it is fitting that they’re able to resolve the situation without blowing up anything or punching anyone (Star Trek loves to talk the talk about how anti-military it is, then end their movie with some Klingons getting blasted), it still seems a little... dry. You’re not going to have Kirk hang off of anything, story? Not even a little? Okay. I still had fun. 
And you’ll note that once again, Deanna Troi was of no help whatsoever. Geez, woman, you’re oh for three here!
11 notes · View notes