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#exile was literally what got me wanting to write my own IF story cause i wanted to give alph a cushy life
deathbecomesthem · 14 days
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Hardy fuckin' har Thanatos...
I went through my archive last night for TBT and was like "ah exile in guyville. so special, such a beloved tale of mine how have I missed it so far on this nostalgic go-around?"
Well I passed out at like...9, so I was gonna do it this morning.
IMAGINE MY SURPRISE WHEN ITS NOT REUPLOADED YET. I know you're literally the busiest and truly who gives a shit about Tumblr when you're out there doing the good work but I still miss it and I will be rereading as a lunch treat.
So anyway.
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If anyone wants to read this masterpiece.
YOU CAN FIND IT ON AO3
Love youuuuuuuuu!!!
Ok. So. I've been sitting on this ask for a while, because I needed to actually put some words down about this story before bringing it up on this blog.
Exile in Guyville is on my AO3 (BustyStClaire), and it's my the Eddie Munson series I've been writing the longest. I will bring this story onto this blog. For now, please enjoy a little scene between EIG!Eddie and one of his exes: Jessica. The first in a series of vignettes about Eddie's relationships. Until we get to Steve.
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A summer morning, that’s how he sees her. Warm and calm, but there’s always the possibility of a storm rolling through. So far, it's been nothing but peaceful sunrises, but he feels a cold front sneaking in. There’s a chill in the air that trails behind her when she moves through the apartment. 
Jessica is sitting cross-legged in the papasan chair in the corner. The arms of her fern brush along the top of her head, and Eddie’s eyes are focused on the way the sun shines on the small hairs, backlit by its rays. A halo. What else could it be? A perfect angel, a giver. She got him off the smokes and the booze - mostly. As far as she knows.
“So, have you decided about Sunday?” Jessica’s eyes are focused on the needle and fabric held taut in her hands. She doesn’t look at him, but he can see the way her face is set - frozen - icy thoughts have crept into the muscles of her jaw. She’s clenched tight. 
Looks like you could use a little meditation time, huh? Eddie thinks this, but doesn’t say it. A taunt. Childish. He feels like a child right now, though. He wants to cause a scene. He wants to mock and throw verbal punches. He wants her to leave. 
“Sunday?” Eddie asks even though he knows. Sunday. Lunch at Jess’s mom’s place. Meeting her parents. 
Jessica doesn’t try to hide her disgust. The corners of her mouth dig deep, not a frown, but grimace. The worst part is that she knows that he knows. He’s been putting her off about this for weeks, and now it’s the Friday before. She’s told her mother that Eddie, her boyfriend of 18 months, will definitely be there. He will definitely, finally, meet her and dad. He will definitely not cancel last minute. Not again.
“For fuck’s sake, Eddie. Yes or no? Are you going with me or not?” Eddie’s not watching her face anymore, he’s watching the wooden hoop that holds the small piece of fabric bounce on the wooden floor. Once and then twice. 
“I -” Eddie shakes his head. He knows what he should say, the words are there. Worse still, the intention is there. Because Jess has been good. She’s been very good. In every way. He eats fresh fruits and vegetables every day now, and the meditation practices have cut down on his panic attacks. Eddie knows that he’s better with her. The “yes” is right there. It’s vibrating at the back of his tongue, it’s moving along the roof of his mouth. He opens his mouth to release it, “ - I’m not going.”
Jessica doesn’t say anything. In fact, Eddie never hears Jessica’s voice again. When she looks at him, all of the heat escapes her body. Her tongue is a block of ice against the back of her teeth.
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purpleglitch · 8 months
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I've been insane about roleswap ever since taxolotl made fanart about it. Whenever someone mentions it my brain explodes. So many things could change, because, in the lore, Dream's reputation as this scary unbeatable guy iinfluences how things play out. Not only because of him being the creator of the server but because of manhunt, so maybe george would have to "prove" that he's strong and SHOULD be feared. The ways he could do this are alarming, considering how smart he is and how little he cares about consecuences. Also, george and dream approach roleplay pretty diferently, so I think A LOT of relationships and events can change. How would have exile been if george was the one in charge? would rs!rivals be mortal enemies because of techno being an anarchist and dream a king?
Idk there's just so much, but anyway DNF ANGST.
OH ANON YOU'RE SO SMART I LITERALLY GASPED WHEN I FINISHED READING
YOU'RE SO RIGHT so many things could've gone differently because of how their roles changed and i didnt think about this when writing that brainrot post, love the idea of rs!george proving that people should fear him, and without the "dream will protect me" dynamic from c!dnf it's so interesting to think about what would happen, rs!gnf has the power to make c!gnf's "destroying the smp" dream come true and i feel like because his "apathy" or how he hids his emotions/attachments, he could fit the monster title that people gave c!dream, like emotionless, apathetic, how he doesn't care about the consequences, idk how to explain it but im shaking with excitement. also this got long again but here are more thoughts xD
For those events, i'd say first that exile could've happened from a different cause, i think tommy could've been one of the people that knew about george's actual feelings towards dream and viceversa so maybe he could've used dream as leverage against george (maybe for the discs?) or straight up harmed him which made george very angry and instead of putting obsidian walls around new l'manberg like c!dream, he could just threaten to blow it all up again unless tubbo exiled tommy, what if instead of the "spirit speech" is george laughing at tommy thinking dream is important to him and pretending he's only threatening destruction because he harmed the king of the smp which was against their "allyship" with l'manberg. During the actual exile, i think george could've been more mischievous and pranking tommy destroying his stuff and laughing at him for his situation, while also throwing comments that it was tommy's own fault for what happened, and whenever tommy tried to rebel against him i imagine george would be like "aww tommy don't do that... you don't want me to blow up your city with all your friends in there, do you? remember that poor tubbo only has one life left!" all with a fake sad voice(??)
As for rs!rivals..... oof, that's a bit more complicated like you said their political stances are very different, and i remember that clip of c!techno killing c!george on the throne room and.... yeah.... but maybe since they know each other from other servers they could have talked privately about dream's role as the king and how it was george's idea for him so he could relax and not be as involved in the story as before, techno would also be one of the people that know about rs!dnf feelings about each other since dream brings george up in almost every conversation they have, also i feel like techno would throw jokes like "dream you're copying my fashion style look at you, cringe, wear something else" and maybe it's my rivals bias but i want them to be at least in friendly terms 😭 george and techno would be not as close as rs!rivals but they teamed up for doomsday and i think techno would find amusing george's crazyisms and when the prison arc happens and dream finds out i think he would plead to techno to help george somehow, he tells him he's no longer king, hasn't been for months but he's worried about his boyf- george and either (1) knows about the favors between them and he tells techno he's using george's favor to help him or (2) maybe before the smp rs!rivals already had some favors going on so dream uses his so techno helps george. and techno reluctantly does, he clearly doesnt want to make his friend happy, shut up chat.
but i'm also interested in your thoughts of rs!rivals being mortal enemies!!! 👀👀👀 sorry this got too long LMAO didnt proofread this so sorry for any errors
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gncrezan · 3 years
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hi u totally don’t have to answer this if it’s too in-depth or whatever but i love ur art & ocs and was curious was IF games you’ve played & if u could give us a quick run-down of ur MCs & who your main ROs were <3 love u
YES I CAN ..... any excuse to drop random info abt my ocs/mcs LOL... under the cut bc im insufferable and talk abt it forever…. since this got a tiny bit (very) long, i just bolded the info you actually asked for AHAHA
in order of what i played:
wayhaven chronicles !! i played aliyah rana, and now i’ve gotten past the honeymoon stage of “wow this was great!” ive decided im taking ub and running from the author... and ali romaced felix !
they take after rebecca more than rook, but their similarities towards rook is where it counts (in the friendliness, charisma, kindness etc) !! their relationship with rebecca is a little distanced bc neither of them really knew what to say, but they're trying to patch it up now <3 views bobby as a nuisance that calls them every so often LMFAOO
mind blind !! @/sysba the absolute legend recced this (who you can blame for getting me into IF in the first place) n i’ve got two mcs for this! niko romanced gray bc i adored the mutual cookie baking scene, and once i realised kenzie was in fact a dog person, i immediately went back to make a new mc and so laila romanced kent!
laila is quiet and both methodical and very VERRYYY smart! being a genius made them a little overconfident, and so they take failures horribly… think gifted kid burnout except laila is still overachieving on fumes 😭 these wisemans also grew up in a multifaith household (jewish and nepali hindu) so they’re insanely busy in oct/nov/dec LMFAOO …
niko is loud and very funny. while laila is trying to cover up being a little insecure in how she fits into her ment family, niko actually doesn’t give a shit LMFAO… being a zero sucks, but he learnt to live with it: niko genuinely doesn’t think he have anything to prove as a wiseman ! he’s a social butterfly and extremely charismatic, similar to nick in a lot of ways, and would have been rly popular had it not been for the zero
a tale of crowns !! i am so obsessed with this seriously i changed my URL FOR THIS !!! my mc for this is niyaz who romanced rezan ! if ur brown you deserve to read this like LORD it made me insanely happy like just go read this please
niyaz's has charmed their entire way through life and as crown they're abt to charm their way out LMFAO... they're hyperaware of how others perceive them, and try to say the right thing to the right person, even if it doesn't exactly align with their principles, which can backfire. have a nervous habit in scratching at their eyes. their affinity was death of the sun!
body count ! no romances locked in yet bc there is just ... so much to choose from i feel bad for picking one person AHAHA!! it does look as though carmen is going to accidentally trip and fall for nyra, and i have no idea abt cameron . he coupled up with ellis and i will never forgive this website for killing off my themboss...
cam and carmen are competitive with each other and if they had been in the villa together, they would have been mortified LMFAOOO neither of them expected the other to join anything like body count ... cameron studied physics while carmen studied languages and were very good at that until life fucked them over and they didn't land a job related to their major
the two of them dyed their hair blond separately bc they wanted to stand out from each other, and when they found out they were STILL matching, you would not believe the amount of arguing in the family group chat
cameron joined the show on a whim and doesn't know what the fuck he's doing </3 carmen joined because she loves money and loves women... they're very different in a lot of ways, but one thing they do share is they want to be perceived as good looking . LOL
the exile !! alpheus is dear to my heart cause he was a dnd oc first that i threw into the exile for fun and i rly should have realised this was a angst filled plotline otherwise i would have never done this to my boy 😔😭 he’s currently romancing veth and had a will-they-wont-they with sabir !! but the others LIs make me think so hard OTL so this is due to change
borrowed things from his dnd characterisation... he's extremely family oriented and has a great relationship with esme and emeline, even if his relationship with marcelle is a little strained ! he's sarcastic and was popular pre-exile because of his bleeding heart and kindness. values peace and really wasn't built to be a general, even if he's good at killing :( misc things include pheonix blood infusion, fighting with a scythe and being a horse girl at heart <3
faith of gods !! kelsang dorji my beloved.... i draw them often since they were an oc first and i haven’t been able to draw him in a fog-specific context ... and i’ve yet to rly romance anyone 😭
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i’m a little in love with cian but kelsang is not (arthur fist)
kelsang is also religious, and i rmb praying to one of the gods but the name escapes me... i've gotta go back and play it again bc i think the concept is so cool !
i'm also trying to rehash them and give them more personality bc kelsang was a character design thing first and is pretty much a blank slate LOL
i also don’t think i can romance flor cause that’s my best friend’s name and i can’t reconcile that LMFAO
my to read list includes northern passage, mage reborn, citadel, atollo, wayfarer, ofna (MR BHATRA...) and when twilight strikes ! plus more that i don’t rmb bc i always forget to note down what i want to play ! if anyone has gotten this far and wants to rec smthn, feel free to drop that in the replies 👀
and i’m also waiting for (unreleased as of now) golden harp, redwood and eye of the moon ! eotm releases literally this friday tho 🤩
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some-dr-writings · 3 years
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SDR2 guys x intimidating looking but sweet S/O
Hajime Hinata:
·       You had been Hajime’s best friend for as long as he could remember. You were always so smart and the top in your class. Truthfully Hajime expected you to be invited to Hope’s Peak, but… you were always rambunctious. As smart as you were, you didn’t care for rules that existed outside ones of safety. You were labeled the school delinquent, getting into fights, breaking most rules for the sake of breaking them, doing whatever you could to get a reaction from others, all the while smiling and laughing away having the time of your life.
·       “Ah! Hajime! That’s amazing!” “Y/N!?” You scooped him into your arms, lifting off his feet, spinning around and around. “MY boy, going to HOPE’S PEAK ACADEMY! This is amazing!” Suddenly your spinning came to a stop, stomping a foot on the ground to do so. “Hajime. Hope’s Peak is far, so you’ll be moving right? If that’s the case, you better text me every day! Okay, you don’t have to if you don’t want too, but at least keep me informed of the big stuff like how your first day was or the school festival or at least the sports day! Or, OR! If you’d like, maybe I could move with you, somewhere close to the school and I’ll just get a job in the area so you could just talk to me in person! I would visit, but even by train it’s a two-day trip and I’d probably get board at some point and get kicked off, and there’s also studying for school or work or whatever I do.” A light pink dusted Hajime’s cheeks, feeling a bit flustered at how excited you were, still effortlessly him closely, high off the ground. He swore his heart began to race seeing your absolutely beaming smile which seemed to shine brighter than the sun to him.
·       When with his friends he’d speak of you often, not to the point of annoyance, just enough for them to know he clearly missed you. From how he described you, you seemed to be the sweetest, most wholesome person in existence despite being a bit rowdy. So when Kazuichi caught Hajime holding hands and appearing to be going on a date with a person covered in scars exposed by your unbuttoned shirt, haired dyed a bright blond, scary tattoos, spiked jacket and boots, even having a mask covering you face, nobody believed him till Hajime walked in on the conversation, saying that was you. After that they insisted on meeting you, wanting to know such a seemingly contrasting person existed, and when they did meet you, they gave Hajime their approval, even if he didn’t want or need it.
   Izuru Kamakura:
·       Many things Izuru found boring, but if he had to choose one thing he found more boring than anything else, it’d have to be the baseless rumors surrounding you, his partner, all because you had a scary face. It was so ridiculous he couldn’t even entertain the idea of you secretly being the heir of a yakuza gang or something so off the wall even he couldn’t recall. Whenever he heard such rumors as he walked down Hope’s Peak’s halls, he thought he may just fall asleep from how tiring it was, thinking about the mental gymnastics people had to go through to even come to such conclusions.
·       It was another day and again he heard of your imaginary exploits of having killed a man in cold blood for money or some such and instantly he just felt exhausted. He continued to walk till he stopped before a door and knocked. “Oh, hey Izu-baby. What brings you here?” “… I just found myself here.” You chuckled, simply opening the door, taking your boyfriend’s hand and leading him in.
·       You promptly plopped him into a seat, going off to get something, Izuru had the chance to examine the many brushes, hair products and hair accessories spread out on the counter. There were even several sticky notes on the edges of the large vanity mirror, neat writing noting some appointments you had. Seems like he had come in when you were cleaning between appointments. “I found a new brush and I think it should work well with your thick long hair.” You placed your a hand on one of the back rest corners of the chair, leaning a little over him, smiling as you held said brush before him. “Then test it.”
·       You giddily collected his hair, your touch occasionally grazing across his skin. Your hands though covered in cuts, slightly dyed from all your hair styling work, and probably tired from having worked for almost six hours straight according to the sticky notes, they still were ever so gentle, making sure to not get caught on or pull any knots. Then you began to brush, starting from the bottom and working your way up. “Izuru, you have a few split ends, and it’s been a while, mind if I give you a light trim while I have you here?” “You have an appointment in forty-three minuets.” “Hmm… Yeah, I can get this done in time.” Once you reached the top you gave his hair a few extra strokes from top to bottom, making sure you got everything. “Oh, I also found a new shampoo which can help your hair. It’s still so dull, but at this point it might be because of your diet since I can’t seem to find anything that can work for you. Have you been eating? Has the staff been testing you on talents again and not feeding you?” “No.” You were going to ponder for a moment, to try figuring out what your boyfriend’s problem could be when said boyfriend placed a hand on your cheek, lightly pulling you beside him. Closing his eyes, he leaned in and kissed you on the cheek. “You’re so exhausted you forgot we spoke of this very subject yesterday.” “Huh?” Your entire face flushed a bright red, still unused to Izuru’s sparce displays of affection. Then to your confusion he pulled you onto his lap. “I-Izu-baby?” “You are taking a nap.” For some reason in that moment of seeing you so flustered he recalled the rumors. The thought of you even harming a fly was laughable, you were the absolute sweetest, kindest, caring person he had ever met. Holding you close he simply leaned into you, thinking you could both use a nap together.
   Nagito Komaeda:
·       You made your own rumors. The ones about you secretly being an assassin, you started it. The one about how you once were an international thief, you did it. The one about you selling drugs, that one was actually an accident, you were just getting a friend their pain meds, but you spread about a few more stories like it not long after. Why purposefully spread rumors many would wonder… well… there were two reasons.
·       The first, you found most people annoying and simply didn’t want to deal with them, content with your small, very close friend group. It was the perfect way to get people to back off so you wouldn’t have to deal with them in their first place. You also found some fun in seeing people run from you from your presents alone, made you feel like some cartoon super villain which you found quite amusing.
·       The second reason… You had always told your boyfriend the first one, but to his confusion, you’d always avoid telling him the other reason. Nagito knew you’d had to have your reasons for not telling him, but… well you were his partner, of course he was going to worry a little even if it seemed you knew what you were doing.
·       But he could ignore it no longer when you took the blame for him. Nagito came up with a plan to blow up a building, forcing the exams to be delayed so his classmates could have more time to prepare for them… and you took for the blame for it, being expelled for a time, but not forever. You couldn’t even stay on your dorm on campus, winding up staying in some cheap hotel paid by the school.
·       “Why did you do it?” “Eh, Nagito?” “WHY! Why did you take the blame for me!? I was trying to get you more time so you could show off in glory, but now you’re stuck here. Why did you do it?” Nagito was always so calm and composed, likely from facing disaster after disaster caused by his bad luck, but he was actually troubled, he was upset, but not even at himself like he always did thinking himself trash, no, he was legitimately upset with you. “… Normally people greet their partner with a ‘hello’ or something.” The last thing you were expected to be greeted by your first morning exiled from school was your boyfriend in such a state. “I- No. Y/N, tell me, why?” “… I…” You couldn’t tear your eyes away from him, this new side you had never even thought existed, yet you also couldn’t bear to look at him either so instead you looked to his feet. “I don’t want to lie to you, but… I don’t want to tell you the truth either. But! What I can tell you, is that this is fine, I chose this, I wanted this. So, you don’t have to worry about me, this just means I have even more time to develop my talent.” You tried giving him a smile, but it just ended up strained seeing that didn’t placate him. W-why? He always saw everything ultimates did was amazing and respected even the worst of decisions, yet… he was mad, and sad, and so many other things you couldn’t pinpoint not being able to bring yourself to study his expression for long.
·       “No, this is not fine. What you did is not helping you. This is only a detriment. I-I-I, I just can’t understand! I can’t understand why. How did this turn out so wrong?” “… the other reason.” “Huh?” You spoke so quietly, it was but a whisper, Nagito had just barely caught it. “The other reason… It’s why I NEED a bad reputation, not just something I want for the fun of it.” You sighed, preparing for the inevitable Nagito calling himself trash and you trying to comfort him song and dance. “You’re such a volatile wild card. I never know what you’ll do next. Nagito, you literally tried to blow up a building with people inside, I know your luck probably would have saved them or something or you assumed the ultimates inside would save the day, but… that’s not healthy! You’ve been through so much and need help. I, I want to help you, but I just don’t know what to do. So… to me, the best I can do is try to protect you.” Even as his eyes widened, realizing what happened, you continued. “With a bad reputation, rumors of all sorts, both extreme and little, it can be expected that I can do anything without it being out of character. I can take on anyone’s bad actions and call it my own and all will believe it… Even if I can’t protect you from the insanity that is our life, the very least I can do is protect you from yourself, the consequences of your actions. I can’t get you to at last see yourself as decent, I can’t stop your luck from torturing you, this… this is all I can think of for what I could ever do for you… it’s the only kind of affection I can give without you saying or thinking you’re unworthy of it… though I guess I don’t even have that now, but… I don’t know, maybe this was-”
·       …
·       He hugged you. He didn’t know what to say. He took in everything you said, yet his mind was just blank. He had so much to say, yet he just could… All he could do was just nuzzle into you, one who was just so sweet and kind, and… he needed to better for you, Nagito at least new that for sure.
   Imposter:
·       Imposter wondered how they ever were lucky enough to find a partner like you. They never thought they’d find anyone who could get them to see themselves as a person even without the disguises, let alone a whole class at one point. Yes, they still disguised themselves, but when they were just with you they felt okay to not keep the make-up, wigs and costumes. They were just… whoever they were without being someone else. Their own identity was something they still struggled with but working on it with your helped.
·       Individuals who could stay true to themselves no matter what were people they respected highly, that was probably what got them to fall for you in the first place. No matter who avoided you, the children who cried from seeing your large, buff figure, no matter the sports nuts who insisted on you joining their team, you always were the shy Super High School Level Flower Shop Keep who loved exercising.
·       When they first met you, they were masquerading as Beyakuya Togami, not exactly the most sociable of personalities, so they thought they scared you away. When first meeting a person you didn’t speak much, instead you’d gift flowers and spoke through flower language. “Oh, well… there’s a lot you can say with flowers. I’ve just always liked them. I just like being outside, so I exercise a lot! But then I got toned, and already being on the bulkier side some people find me scary… Ah, but if I give the children flowers, they usually stop crying… unless a bee comes by, then they cry again.” Even though you were so soft spoken when you did speak, it was still rather intimidating. There was just so much power in it.
·       They rather enjoyed how you’d decorate them with your beloved plants, whether it be placing them behind their ear, in their hair, or in their breast pocket. They also adored each bouquet you gave. Very quickly their whole dorm room smelled of fast-food and a light floral perfume. They pressed and kept every last flower, preserving them all even the ones from when you first met.
·       You were so open and honest, even though you tried hiding it they knew when you had a crush on them- or well Beyakuya… They had no identity outside of whoever they were impersonating, but… the thought made their heart ache. So, when you came up to them with giant bouquet filled with tulips, purple roses, red roses, alstroemerias, and baby’s breath they could easily see even as you hid it behind your back, a bright blush on your cheeks, they knew what was happening, and rejected you before you could give them the flowers and confess. You hugged the bouquet close as they explained their situation, and even after, you still held out the flowers to them. “So, your identity is more complex than I knew, but all our time together still happened. And if you change identities, it’ll be like a change in color. Definitely different, even changing the meaning, but the base is still the same, you’ll still remember our time together even as someone else.” And since that moment, no matter what came, you never left them.
   Gundham Tanaka:
·       The moment Gundham met the Super High School Level Vet, Gundham fell head over heels for them. They were an intimidating, brutish, scarred from battles past, every last feature was terrifying, their features sharp, everything about them commanded the respect of all, even getting his Dark Devas to be weary of them at first sight.
·       Caring for animals was a tricky job, it often involved getting scratches and bites, but you also needed to be patient and kind. You needed to be respected but also not appear hostile. A balance you embodied, looking fierce, yet you were so gentle and sensitive to others around you.
·       The pair of you always spent time looking after his many animals, tending to any injuries or illnesses they possibly could have gotten.
·       You also tended to Gundham Tanaka himself, much to his flustered, blushing protest. “I have no such injures of which you speak!” “Tanaka, you can’t even hold a pencil you hand is hurting so bad. Please let me at least look at it.” He kept refusing till some students came by asking if he were alright, fearing the scary looking person who kept looming around him all day. “Pathetic! Of such a low level you can’t even decern one’s true nature!” Then he stomped off till finally he found you. “My Emperor!” “Hey Tana-” “I seek thy aid, for only one of your caliber could even remotely stand a chance of resisting my poisoned skin, let alone tent to the curse that plagues this mortal form!” You just silently stared at him for a moment before you started fussing over him, clutching his jacket since you wanted to hug him. “What happened!? Did it get worse!? Tell me EVERYTHING about how you feel! Do you think it’s infected!? How does it hurt!? Does it sting or burn, or what!?” Gundham himself began to panic, unsure as to how to calm and put you at ease, never before seeing you worried to the point of tears forming in the corners of your eyes! However, you did quickly settle down, getting serious tending to his wound…
·       And even as you did so, you avoided touching him. If you needed to apply ointment, you’d use a q-tip, you’d do anything you could to not touch him… Even you tending to him sent his heart racing, showing vulnerability, he was used to giving the care, not the other way around. He felt vulnerable in a way, he showed you he was hurting, but you were so gentle with him, so aware of him, even stopping and giving him a moment to pause and collect himself.
·       Someone so attentive and understanding… He groaned, embarrassed at how giddy, and excited, and nervous even the mere thought of you made him.
   Kazuichi Soda:
·       He was terrified of you at first, even going so far as to actively avoid you. But then he met you. The moment he did so he was so confused as to how he found you scary? After actually taking to you, he found you, looks and all so adorable! He’d gush to anyone and everyone about how kind and amazing and sweet you were. He’d defend you to the death if a person even made the smallest negative comment about you, much to your complete embarrassment.
·       After becoming your boyfriend Kazuichi would always hang around you, cooing over everything that was you, shattering any intimidating precents you had with the man hugging your arm, speaking in such a sickeningly sweet tone with sparkling eyes.
·       Feeling like the world was against you, Kazuichi spent all his time with you to make up for it. No matter how many times you told him he didn’t have to he insisted on giving you all the affection you so rightly deserve!
·       When you weren’t embarrassed by the man’s antics you’d be just as affectionate in return. As he tinkered on whatever you’d hug him from behind, sighing, and nuzzling into the nape of his neck, tickling him, distracting him from his work. He’d giggle, giddy out of his mind at having someone so sweet and adorable love him almost as much as he loved you!
·       If Kazuichi caught even one person giving you a funny look, he’d just hug and snuggle you with a pout, glaring at others.
·       “Kazu, you don’t have to defend me from everyone. I know I’m not exactly the most approachable looking.” “What!? No! You are gorgeous! Adorable! Beautiful! Don’t self-deprecate yourself!” “I’m not, I just… I know you’re affectionate, but you don’t have to be so protective, I appreciate it, but you don’t have to do this every time. I just want you to enjoy yourself not feel like you have to be my knight in shining armor or something.” “Well, I can’t enjoy myself if others are being jerks!” Kazuichi would never admit it to you, but he felt guilty. He knew what it was like to be bullied, for others to make comments. He also felt guilty for judging you so much before meeting you. he was once scared with a person he instantly fell in love with after finally talking to them. He just wanted to make up for that, he wanted to say he was sorry… And feeling you hug him, thank him for being your knight, he was reminded all over why he loved such a sweet person so much, and he was determined to give you all the love he could to make up from being so cruel before.
   Teruteru Hanamura: part 1
·       Teru had a rather interesting relationship with the new delivery person. You weren’t mean, but your whole aura was rather intimidating with your cold demeanor and with how muscular you were. Yet of all people, you were warm and kind to him. You merrily chat about your day, or about anything. You’d get a laugh out of his flirting, even try and miserably fail at flirting back, something Teru found endlessly endearing. Whatever made Teru special he honestly didn’t care, just enjoying your company so much.
·       After your hard work, well hard for most but for you it was just seemingly light stretches, Teru would cook a hearty meal for you to keep you going for the rest of the day! It was his favorite thing to do before opening the restaurant, just that single quiet moment of enjoying a meal with you.
·       Teru could find something attractive about anyone, but with you… well you were certainly attractive, a stallion, a ten out of ten to him, but he found he so quickly grew feelings for you. True a person’s personality or voice could be sexy but there was something different about it with you. But whatever it was, didn’t matter to him, all he knew was that he just wanted to spend more time with you, and whatever you did together didn’t matter to him, as long as you were together.
·       You sighed, taking another bite. “Is something the matter?” “I’m just going to miss this.” “What?” You didn’t even glance his way, simply continuing to enjoy your meal. “Yeah, I gotta move soon. I’ve actually stayed here much longer than I should, but… I just couldn’t resist sticking around longer ‘cause of you… again.” “Ah, well… that’s too bad. It’s been rather fun having you around.” “It’ll be alright. I know you’ll be fine without me. Actually, I’d like to ask you to make a promise to forget me.” “Forget you!? How in tarn- AH I- Ahem- How could I do that!?” You simply smiled and laughed, just as you did before. You placed a hand on his cheek, gently caressing him with your thumb. “You’re the only person I can call a friend. I know you can keep this promise, that’s just the kind of person you are. Sure, you’re a bit raunchy, but you truly are kind and care for others. You could never let me feel guilty about leaving you behind.” Teru was silent for a moment, just taking in what you said. “When will you be leaving?” “Uh… I should say tomorrow, but I’m thinking a week.” A week? Teru could work with that!
·       “Please go on a date with me!” “… Huh?” In complete bafflement you just let Teruteru take your hands into his, a determined glint in his eyes. “If you’ll be leaving I want to make the most of the time we have left!” “…oh… uh… o-okay, we could do that.”
·       And so, the week was filled with date after date, going all out with no inhibitions doing anything you could think of from watching a movie to sky diving. Wherever you went Teru always had a packed meal on hand for the pair of you to enjoy. It was honestly the best week of either of your lives. And all too quickly it had already passed you by.
·       Standing on the bridge in the park you stood side by side watching the sun rise. “Well, that’s it, I better get going. I really enjoyed this, just as always. Thank you.” “Now hold on a moment, you can’t go just yet!” He held out a small plastic container to you. “You need a good meal for the road! Don’t know where you’re going, but wherever it is, it’d be a downright shame if I left you hungry along the way!” You simply stared at him for a moment before the softest, most earnest of smiles he had ever seen creased your lips. So tenderly you took the container. “… Some things never change I suppose… At least I know you can still keep that promise.” Then without so much as explaining your strange words, you disappeared as if you never even were there. It was sad for Teru, yet something in him knew he’d see you again, and that thought let him go back to his everyday life as if you never appeared, yet after that life just seemed more lively to him, just like those later years back in Hope’s Peak, though as to why that time seemed livelier he couldn’t quite remember.
  Nekomaru Nidai:
·       Being a rather intimidating looking guy with a heart of gold, Nekomaru took to understanding your situation quickly. Both of you being athletic and getting rather larger builds it just kinda naturally happened.
·       Being the exceedingly kind individual you were others often took advantage of that. Even if you knew it was bad you couldn’t bring yourself to not help others in need for even the smallest of things. This was not something Nekomaru could stand, but finding you standing out in the rain for two days straight was the last straw and the man insisted on training you! You were a bit nervous at first not wanting to take up so much of your best friend’s time, but with some reassurances Nekomaru managed to warm you up, both literally and metaphorically to the training.
·       At some point the training turned into days out, going hiking up mountains, or jogging on beaches, swimming in lakes and doing crossfit, sometimes going out for walks in the night, exploring the city looking for things to do, perhaps some karaoke, some slow dancing by moon light, and yeah you two just ended up dating without meaning too.
·       The pair of you always came up with excuses like the slow dancing was training in balance, no you totally did not want to dance because it was a beautiful night and you could hear ballroom music not far in the distance, no that was totally not it, that’d be dumb… or so you kept telling yourself in these moments so you would not confess to the man fearing he really did only see these outings as training and nothing else.
·       That was till you overheard Nekomaru chatting with his classmates, one of them asking how his ‘date’ with you went and he spoke of your beautiful hike up the mountains, not even batting an eye at their wording. Did… did he not notice, or just not care? Did this mean he liked you too? Or did you mishear? Quickly getting frustrated with this line of thinking you decided to just settle this!
·       “There you are-” “I have something to tell you!” The man silently stood there, just waiting. Okay, this was it, and you took a deep breath. “I… I REALLY LIKE YOU!” “I REALLY LIKE YOU TOO! YOU ARE A CHERISHED FRIEND OF MINE!” “NO, I MEAN- I-I-I LOVE YOU, I THINK!? I DON’T KNOW!” “I LOVE YOU TOO, A LOT IN FACT!” “N-NOT AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU!” “OH YEAH!?” “YES! SO MUCH!”
·       Screaming your feelings for one another was a very common occurrence in the relationship. Even if one of you simply caught sight of the other off in the distance you’d yell ‘I love you’s, which more often than not scared or startled the people around you hearing such loud, booming voices out of nowhere.
·       Life with Nekomaru could be a bit much at times, but it was well worth it for such an amazing guy.
   Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu:
·       You were perfect for him.
·       You didn’t have any reputation really, but wherever you went people knew not to mess with you. Your mere presents not much but if one got close, they could feel this unsettling air about you making them go away. You, being the Super High School Level Street Fighter knew how to defend yourself from most attackers so Fuyuhiko didn’t have to worry about your safety like he’d have to with most others like the majority of his old classmates like Hajime.
·       You were also the most kind and sweet person he had met. Behind closed doors you’d always have you arms open for Fuyuhiko. You’d hold him close, just let him listen to your steady heartbeat and make him feel so safe and secure. His favorite thing was to just cuddle with you.
·       He also liked you being by his side, it served a dual purpose. One: if somehow when meeting some rival gang his reputation didn’t precede him, you were enough to intimidate them at a glance, despite his own baby face. The second and much more important to him, just being with you. True you were well equipped to handle yourself, but you were still human can had come back home to him plenty of times with new scars not from your usual fights, so by your side he and Peko could protect you.
·       He also liked how you were with his subordinates. You were strict, showing no signs of weakness, more than willing to put them in their place should it be needed, yet that didn’t stop you from being kind. You’d do research for days on end trying to find the perfect birthday gift them. You’d train their kids by hand in all ways of fighting, but not for attacking but self-defense, their parents were in a dangerous job so your ‘day job’ of being a children’s fighting instructor helped to place their minds at ease a little.
·       If he could he’d go on for hours singing your praises. You were perfect for him in every single way without a single doubt.
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wolfish-trickster · 3 years
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I HATE YOUR FICS.YOU WRITE LOKI AS SOME SWEET UWU BABY WHO DID NOTHING WRONG. HE TRIED TO KILL THOR! HE TRIED TO KILL HIS DAD AND MOM! HE TRIED TO DESTROY EARTH! HE TOOK OVER ASGUARD! HE DOESNT HAVE HEART ONLY BLACK WHOLE IN HIS CHEST! HE'S EVIL AN DEAD ANYWAYS. HE WAS NEVER A GOOD PERSON! GO LIVE IN YOUR LIES BUT DON'T WRITE LOKI SOFT!!!!!!!!!!!
All caps huh? This will be fun...
I love arguing with people especially when I know I'm right.
First: I never said he did nothing wrong. All I ever said was I understand why he did what he did. He did a lot of wrong things, but so did the 'heroes' aka Avengers. Bruce is out of control everytime he hulks out, Tony was selling bombs and explosives, Steve fought in WW2 where he wasn't exactly a gentle fighter, Clint shoots arrows (and he never misses his targets), Thor tried to commit a genocide on Jotunheim all because he got called princess and Natasha literally set a hospital on fire. None of them are saint. All of them killed. But all of them were forgiven because they are the heroes™. Loki wasn't because he's the scapegoat of the MCU. Plus it's canon he was mindcontrolled when he invaded Earth but I'll get to it later.
Second: When exactly did he try to kill Thor? If you're gonna tell me that horrible snake story I'm gonna yeet you out of the window because that's the most ooc thing for Loki to do. In 2011 he tried to fight Thor on the bridge, but not to the point of killing him. His emotions were a mess, he was a mess, he was crying the whole time. To top it all off he was willing to kill his entire race (Jotuns) in order to be the 'worthy son' in Odin's eyes. The next time that comes to my mind is when they're on the Avengers tower and Loki stabs him with that teeny tiny push dagger that's practically a toothpick to Thor. He could've used any other knife but he chose the smallest he had instead.
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(Plus notice how small part of the blade is bloody meaning Loki struck it deep enough to cause pain but no serious damage, but then again that could be just the lighting of the scene)
Third: He never tried to kill his dad. He lead Laufey to him when he was in Odinsleep but he killed his own biological dad so Odin could see him as worthy son. That's all he ever wanted from him. And for Frigga: yes, he did tell Kurse to take the stairs to the left (or right I can't remember which one atm) but did he know Frigga will be there? I don't think so. Frigga died protecting Jane, not because Loki send the monster after her. Besides, he was raging when he found out she died, that's not a propriate reaction for someone who tried to 'kill his mom'.
Fourth: He never said he wants to destroy Earth. He only ever said he wants to rule us. That's a difference. Plus it's canon the mind stone in his scepter was influencing him too and on top of that The Other was threatening to kill him (torturing him even) if he fails.
Fifth: He didn't take over Asgard. With Thor in exile and Odin in Odinsleep Loki was next in line, Frigga gave him the Gungnir (that big golden spear) and made him king in deleted scene. He never took the throne, he accepted it. He even said so himself:
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Sixth: About the heart thing: he does have one. He can't just have empty chest cavity now, can he? How else would all the blood get pumped into different parts of his body?
Seventh: He's evil? Bitch where? When he saved Thor and Warriors 3/4 from Jotunheim in first Thor movie? When he saved Jane when he didn't have to and could escape in TDW? When he saved Thor in the same movie? When he returned to Asgard with that bigass ship for everyone to escape in in Ragnarok? (I don't like that movie that much but at least they got something of Loki's character correct)
He was a good person. He still is, he just has very tall walls around him and acts cold to protect himself. And you can bet your ass I'm going to write soft Loki as much as I can because that's how I like to write him. Everyone gets soft from moment to moment, even such a hurt and complex character like Loki. He deserves some softness in his life.
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middlenamesage · 3 years
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Black Moon Lilith and Lilith the Character Archetype: My Reflections Coming out of Black Moon Lilith Conjunct the North Node
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Following the astrological transits, both the collective and my personal, I have for a while noticed that when Black Moon Lilith is at play, it’s really hard for this to go unnoticed in my life. I always could sense this energy, I knew what it felt like, but used to find it hard to describe, or at least to dissect enough to understand with any valuable meaning.
Physically speaking, the astronomical point known in astrology as Black Moon Lilith is the point along the Moon’s orbit that is farthest from Earth (the lunar apogee), a point that changes position in the zodiac along with the changing orbit of the moon. To me it makes sense this point can be so potentially relevant to us, as all living beings are very much guided by the Moon, who keeps us in connection with each other. Out where the Black Moon is, in this metaphorical place of exile, it’s more of an “every man (or woman!) for himself!” vibe. Lilith is very much about the instinct of self preservation. It’s about resisting control or exploitation by others (and/or internalizing its effects). Often the two occur together as two faces of the same trauma. Black Moon Lilith represents the areas where life has taught us that we absolutely must advocate for ourselves. However, she can also bring shame and denial of wants wherever she is placed, or transiting, because this is something that generally develops where we have been told or shown we can’t have something.
Black Moon Lilith is in fact named for Lilith in the old testament/Jewish folklore, and the way we have come to make sense of its effects (rather, its correlations to our lives) is in considerable measure inspired by this character, and her archetype- who has many interpretations. Lilith was Adam’s first wife, before Eve, who left his ass! She refused to lie beneath him during sex, saying they were created equal. I think we can interpret this metaphorically, of course, as resistance to being controlled in many potential terms… but also literally, as there is a focus of unconstrained sexuality concerning Lilith, which I have observed has some definite relevance to the Black Moon too, but is far from the only or even the most important way to understand it.
Various legends say that after fleeing Eden, Lilith went on to become a she-demon/succubus/baby kidnapper/baby killer/so on….. (those are just the accusations I’m recalling off the top of my head). But over these many years, Lilith has picked up many other story lines, provided inspiration for phenomena such as Black Moon Lilith, and gained many evolving faces and interpretations. Other than being a religious figure, and/or a she-demon, some of her contemporary associations include witchcraft/dark magic, creative renditions in fantasy and horror, gothic culture, and the biggest switch of all, her status as the first feminist.
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As a potent force from the most distant shadows of the Moon’s reach, where connection to one another is compromised and we must turn to ourselves to defend our basic natures, I’ve found that Black Moon Lilith can have both positive correlations- such as going one’s own way where it truly benefits one’s life, putting one’s foot down to mistreatment, and stepping into one’s personal power- and negative correlations such as pushing away and/or disregarding other people, general concern with defending one’s own initiatives, to the point where it is premature or anti-productive, and the shame, denial and/or rage that many have developed from being disallowed their power by others.
How we express Black Moon Lilith can be instigating healthy boundaries on one hand, and setting up unnecessary walls of defense on the other. It can be self respect on one hand, and self obsession/failure to consider others, on the other. It can be self protection on one hand, and self sabotage on the other. It can be shame and denial over who we really are/what we really want on one hand, and it can be where we liberate ourselves from shame on the other. Very often, it seems to dole out as a complicated mix of both the “bad” and the “good”.
It used to be that reflecting on my own experiences, despite my fascination with it, there was very little “good” I saw about the Black Moon’s correlations in my life. I came to associate the energy of Black Moon Lilith with a few of my “trauma responses” that have caused me to sabotage relationships. I felt she had helped me stand up for myself/walk away from people a few times when I actually needed to, but for the most part, she seemed to just make me quick to unconsciously wreck budding relationships, reject others, put up lots of walls, or not want to cooperate/compromise with others- even though this was also betraying my own desires deep down to be close with others. My natal Lilith is in Libra in my 7th house, so the relational element of her is especially relevant.
I think that this Black Moon wound of mine in the realm of partnerships has several big origins/perpetuators I can site, but one of the first and biggest that I can consciously analyze, is having internalized the messages I was told by a parent growing up (not necessarily said in as blunt of terms as I received them) that no one would ever want to be with me because I am too difficult to live with. (I was also shown this when my parents sent me elsewhere to live.) Internalizing this message about myself stripped away my personal power when it comes to partnerships. For so long I approached all relationships assuming they were damned to end before they ever got too serious (something I still do struggle with), and I long believed, a belief that at some times was not as much conscious as it was confirmed with my deeply engrained unconscious behaviors of sabotage, that a ‘true’ and committed relationship is simply something I can’t have. This long internalized belief has given rise to many of my independent behaviors in relationships... both in destructive ways that compromise my connection with others and/or alienate them, and in positive senses that protect my individuality and self respect.
Here’s the thing. I was never wrong to see my trauma responses in the force of Black Moon Lilith. Black Moon Lilith and Lilith the archetype are in fact rooted in trauma. We mustn’t trivialize that part. The defense mechanisms, rage, shame, denial, sabotage, the desire to leave people and things behind, and the general mechanisms for self-preservation which can accompany Lilith stem from instances where we have felt held down, lead to believe we don’t have power, mistreated, and in some cases even horribly abused/violated. But the reality of Black Moon Lilith’s painful origins does not make it all a bad thing! It can be a very empowering thing potentially, because where we are hurt is also where we can find the avenues for healing, and for gaining acceptance of our most authentic self and desires. And there is a very good reason we develop many of these less than savory reactions from traumatic experiences and messaging. Lilith teaches us to recognize our boundaries, and to reclaim the personal power that once was lost! - even if at times we may run too far with these prerogatives in stubborn quests for independence and personal autonomy wherever she resides.
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Though I have been fascinated by and intent to ponder Black Moon Lilith for probably over a year now, my reflections on it, and later on the character Lilith for which the lunar apogee is named, have really gained a lot of new ground during this last month+ of Black Moon Lilith’s conjunction to the North Node. (Which is currently separating, but still in effect.) The Lunar North Node is another very important point in relation to the Moon’s orbit, which shows the path forward. Black Moon Lilith with the North Node in Gemini has proven too be so ripe with many new experiences for me to learn about Lilith. It’s hard to say if anything has actually changed about my relationship with Lilith, or if I am just starting to see more of the positive in her that was always there, instead of just noticing and perpetuating the glaring negative. Also, I decided it was about time to accept Lilith as a part of who I am. I can’t deny the power the associated energies and the archetype has had on my life, so I might as well embrace it- both the good parts and the parts that are a work in progress. (And that is the story of my new little stud earrings with the Black Moon Lilith symbol!)
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One aspect of my relationship with Lilith that I think actually has started to bloom forth in more of a clear-cut positive way with this Lilith-North Node transit, is finding the power to actively and productively embrace a part of myself, via finding/claiming opportunities to keep cultivating this part, even though it’s meant having to disregard my reservations, and even fighting through some shame. I can see now that there is a whole world of great personal empowerment to be tapped into with Lilith, and not just in the ability to leave people behind. (But of course leaving people behind is one means she’ll employ, if it is necessary for stepping into her power!)
I have always seen myself as a writer. It’s not even by choice, and a great deal of the time, for a very long time, I have really resented this natural compulsion of mine. You see, I have a deeply complicated relationship with writing, one that undoubtedly needs some healing. Well, this Black Moon Lilith/North Node conjunction in Gemini, moving through my 3rd house of communications (and as I only found out the other day, also conjunct my natal White Moon Selena, i.e. the lunar perigee/polarity to Black Moon Lilith) ended up bringing me my first opportunities ever getting paid to write… something I guess I just used to assume I couldn’t do, due to my lack of a college degree, as well as the difficult relationship with writing and my paralyzing perfectionism. But with this transit, I placed aside my assumptions of what wasn’t possible for me, and I have some hope now that accepting the opportunity to write for other people, on subjects that generally don’t even mean anything to myself, may just turn out to be the good dose of objectivity needed to help restore some healing to my writing relationship.
Once again, where you’ll find the wounds in your relationship with your personal power, is also where you’ll find how to heal them, and use them to empower yourself and others- and that healing is really what Black Moon Lilith conjunct the North Node has been trying to facilitate for us all. Of course, the process is basically never straightforward and easy, nor all enjoyable. This transit has brought a wide range of Lilith experiences in my life to comment upon.
Some other occurrences have been: abruptly ending an extended off and on relationship with someone where there was always a good deal of power struggle (and would have been power imbalance if I had not stood my ground in a lot of instances), unconsciously driving away or creating distance with a few friends, being consciously and stubbornly persistent in putting more distance between myself and my family than ever before, and facing a couple situations providing awkward trial and error experiments in how I communicate my dissatisfaction to others who wronged me. But I know that all of these experiences are helping me to evolve, and to better understand my responses which stem from wounds that have set into me with the nature of Black Moon Lilith.
And I marvel at the fact that millions of other humans have also been going through experiences which are forcing them to confront and/or evolve their own instincts and behaviors associated with the Black Moon, whether they realize it or not.
Lilith says, “These are my boundaries[or conditions]. You will respect them, or I am outta here.” She says, ‘I know what I am capable of, so I’m gonna fight for it- even if I have to shut out other people.” The placement of our natal Black Moon Lilith shows a prominent area where power has been stolen from us, whether through physical or psychological means (and where the Black Moon is transiting can bring up these issues in other areas, as well). Lilith develops from a wound, and her determination to not feel the powerlessness again can serve as either the healing or the perpetuation of it.
* * * * * * * * * * *
P.S.
For any astro heads reading this with this knowledge of their birth chart, I welcome you to comment or reflect on where 5° Gemini falls in your chart. This is where the (currently separating) conjunction of Black Moon Lilith and the North Node occurred, so the house in your natal chart where it’s transiting, and any natal placements that may be in aspect to this point, especially conjunctions and oppositions, may be able to show where/how you have embodied or encountered Black Moon Lilith energy in recent times.
NOTE :
If anyone is wondering which “Lilith” in astrology I have been referring to, since it is a fairly infamous fact that there are actually 4 things bearing this name in astrology… I have for the most part only followed the mean calculation of Black Moon Lilith (and with Black Moon Lilith’s conjunction to the North Node, mean Lilith is what I’m referring to).
There is also Osculating Black Moon Lilith (aka True Lilith), which is a different calculation of the same concept I have discussed with Black Moon Lilith. A calculation that is actually technically more precise about the moon’s orbit, for the moment that it is taken, as the lunar apogee technically jumps around a little bit a whole lot… yet I have personally found Mean Lilith to be more worth following, especially when following collective transits, if trying to examine the effects of something lingering over an extended period of time, or if conceptualizing Black Moon Lilith’s cycles throughout the entire zodiac. I don’t doubt that the calculation of osculating Black Moon Lilith (which often is not too far from the mean calculation) has a lot of validity to it too though, perhaps especially for natal chart interpretations, and progressions.
As for the other two Liliths, there is the asteroid Lilith- but that is named for a French composer, not the Lilith archetype as we know her. Not saying it isn’t something worth looking into, it just hasn’t been a point of focus for me. And lastly, there is Dark Moon Lilith (aka Waldemath Moon), which is said to be a dark body of unknown origin revolving around the Earth- but there is a lot of debate as to whether it actually exists. I don’t have an opinion one way or another, and I haven’t followed it in transits. However, its placement in my natal chart, with an opposition to Black Moon Lilith for one, does peak my interest.
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kae-karo · 3 years
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fic writer interview!
i saw @prince-liest do this and thus i will take ur 'tagging anyone who wants to do this' seriously lmaoooo (also hi btw hope ur well!!! 💜💜)
How many works do you have on AO3?
ahaha,,,,,159 lmao
What's your total AO3 word count?
fdsjkkjlsfdklj as of today, 2,089,769
How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
only three fsdjkldslfkj the phandom (dan&phil), bnha, and genshin!
What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
chosen (x) - zhongchi (genshin)
to love (and be loved in return) (x) - kaeluc (genshin)
little bird (x) - dabihawks (bnha)
feet don't touch the ground (x) - xiaoven (genshin)
i knew you were fire (x) - dabihawks (bnha)
honestly none of that surprises me except that little bird is still up there, although i think i owe that to sif (@the-final-sif) for sharing it around the time it got posted since it was partly inspired by her raptor stress grip post!!
the rest are all chaptered fics, which is mostly what i expected to be in the top 5 lmao
Do you respond to comments, why or why not?
yes!!! always!!!! no matter what u comment, i will respond!!! and if i don't, it's probably cause ao3 didn't notify me properly or i didn't see it in my inbox or something
as for why, it's mostly to do with like...i know how hard it can be for some people to comment, even just a bunch of heart emojis or a 'i loved this!' or something short and simple? and it means a lot to me that ppl are going out of their way to say something nice, no matter how small, and it's really really important to me to acknowledge that
What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
hmm,,,,,this is a hard one, cause for a very long time, my policy was that my fic would always have a happy ending? and for a long time, that was true!! but the dabihawks interaction (during the raid) broke me, and from an emotional standpoint, i think freeing icarus (x) is probably the one that has the angstiest ending of the two or so that i wrote in that time?
Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?
u know i really haven't written any crossovers? it's normally not my thing cause my brain typically focuses on a single thing and doesn't really have the capacity to think about more than that, so i end up writing just au-style or fusion-style (shoutout to that one bnha but it was scooby doo fic i wrote - x)
i don't think i'd be opposed to writing a crossover but i'd have to be SUPER inspired by the idea and both fandoms lmao
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
aha yes, i have. the only straight up hate i've received was on a kaeluc fic (surprisingly not because it was kaeluc, but bc i was 'mistreating' kaeya in the fic) - to be entirely fair, the commenter pointed out something that i hadn't realized myself, and it led to a second piece of the story that helped me tie up some loose ends, but...let's just say they weren't very kind about their feelings lmao
other than that, i had someone very upset because i didn't tag which character was bottoming in a fic (valid if that bugs u!) and they read through most of it before getting to the smut (and said that they enjoyed everything up to that point) then said they were 'disgusted' by it. i have opinions on that and a few other comments they made, but i will keep them to myself lmao
and beyond that, just a few ppl on my xiaoven fic saying that they were unhappy about the background kaeluc (which is tagged lmao) - really no hate whatsoever til genshin, honestly, which is...very hmmmm :) lmao
Do you write smut? If so what kind?
yep!!! mostly vanilla or vanilla-adjacent lmao i'm not super into heavy kink, although i know if epi reads this she's gonna call me out for being a monsterfucker bc of my dragon!zhongli smut :) lmaoooo but really i tend to write pretty vanilla smut! i also prefer to avoid any noncon/dubcon or hate sex or anything particularly angsty, just not my jam to write!
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
hmm i don't think so? although i don't heavily monitor ao3 (or wattpad/ffn), so i can't really say that for sure lmao
Have you ever had a fic translated?
yes!!! i've had a few fics translated to russian (little bird is one of them!) which is very sweet and i hope that anyone who prefers to read in russian has been enjoying those fics!!
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
alksdfjklsdf only once, and it's deadass how me and rose got together. we decided to co-write a podcast au fic for the phandom (x) and ended up flirting via google docs asldkfjkldsfj
What’s your all time favourite ship?
what a horrible question, making me choose between my children like this!!!! sdlfkjdskf tbh i'm not sure i have a real answer bc it changes as i go? and 'favorite' is so vague,,,,,favorite to read? to write about? to think about? asdklfjkjsdfk i really don't know if i have an answer, but i'll maybe say kaeluc for now lmao
What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
well first and foremost, with only 2 exceptions, i never post a fic unless it's done. i tend to follow wherever my passion leads my brain, so i'm notorious for jumping around between stories and taking breaks from long fic and returning later on to finish them, and i know that i would not do well under the pressure of posting something unfinished and trying to finish it in a timely manner
that said, many wips sit in my google doc folder, but one is Well Known as the one that has followed me through both the phandom and bnha (rose keeps asking who i'm gonna switch the chars to in genshin, but i think it suits bakudeku too well to do that) - only the lonely survive. it sits at like 36k in my wip folder, and i adore the story dearly and i want very much to finish it, but it never makes it quite to the forefront of my motivation, and so it rarely if ever gets worked on...i hate the idea of 'never' finishing it, but it's unfortunately quite likely that i won't 😭😭😭
What are your writing strengths?
emotion!!! and immersion!!! it's my goal in a fic to make it as immersive as possible and saturated with emotion to help convey that feeling of being in the place of the pov character, and i think i do it pretty well. also just bc i feel a little obligated to say it - another strength is actually sitting down and putting words down. i know that's a struggle for a lot of writers and i often get,,,,lovingly bullied? i guess? lmao for being able to bash out a few k in a day most days
What are your writing weaknesses?
this isn't so much a weakness i guess but i am basically incapable of treating crack fic as crack. if i have a cracky idea, it will, without a doubt, end up turning into a Perfectly Serious fic somehow (notable 'crack treated so seriously that it's no longer crack' fics include: todoroki doing the freeze-the-ocean thing from frozen 2, 'shmigaraki', todo and denki get together bc of vine references, the league sells feet pics, shiggy and natsu own a nightclub/bakery, scooby doo but make it bnha, and dabi getting his ears pierced at claire's)
but in all seriousness, i think my main weakness is that i often get comfortable? and i'm not one to typically push myself forcefully out of my comfort zone when it comes to stories that i come up with on my own, which often means that ideas inspired by discussions with others are what prompt me to branch out and try new things?
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
i think, like anything, it has its place? there are certainly stories where it makes sense to do that and even adds depth to a story, although i personally am not exceptionally comfortable enough with other languages (except maybe asl) to do that in fic myself without the assistance of someone very comfortable with that language lmao
What was the first fandom you wrote for?
the phandom! not really my jam to write rpf anymore but it definitely got me started and i'm really grateful for my time writing there, as everyone was super supportive and kind, and it was really a perfect place for a beginner to get comfortable and practice
What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?
again, forcing me to choose between my children...i really don't know that i can pick one fic bc they all exist in such wildly different spaces? i poured my worldbuilding soul into the king of disaster series (mainly dabihawks - x), exile (dan and phil - x) was my first massively long fic, our hearts are heavy burdens we shouldn't have to bear alone (chayea - x) is probably my favorite character/character dynamic study, i'm exceptionally proud of the smut in chosen (zhongchi - x), the list goes on and on and on lmao like. i could probably list half my fics as favorites in some regard dsflkjdfsjkl
anyway, tyty bellamy for putting this on my dash so i could do it as well!!
tagging: literally anyone who wants to do this, i have so many writer friends slkdjfjklsdf but please please tag me if u do it so i can read urs!!! 💜💜💜
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themysteryofwriting · 4 years
Text
Masterpost
Sanders Sides OneShots
What Happened Before Accepting Anxiety - what I think happened that caused Virgil to sink out
The Creativity Split -my interpretation of the Split.  Warning for slight U!Pat and gaslighting
Analogical Clothes Prompt - some fluffy Analogical with Logan stealing Virgil’s clothes
Moceit No Mom prompt - fluffy Moceit prompt with a bit of demiboy Patton or Patton in a skirt where Patton is oblivious til the end
Royality short Pat prompt - no further explanation needed
Can’t You See It - Analogical One Shot. Virgil wants the others to know about how loving Logan is...and that he’s a giant memelord.  Is that so bad?  Hints of background Roceit And Remus being himself
Who say you have to leave your past behind you - my first one shot with Rachel. Some stuff has changed about her since this but it has a special place in my heart.  Hinted at Past U!Pat and Remus being himself. Dee speaks in lies ofc.
This is the Worst Ending - oh boy.  okay this is what I call my angst :tm: If you are senstive to any of the following: don’t read Unsympathetic Patton, multiple major character deaths, blood, Sayori like scene, string imagery, gore, depression, brainwashing, emotional manipulation,murder, strangulation, eating disorder(kinda), stabbing, gaslighting There was a part 2 but......it didn’t last long, i wasn’t proud of it
Puppet!Ray Origins - the first part of my fnaf au! (i literally only have this part and the end so far).  Warnings for U!Pat (he’s Afton), along with child death. However some cute Logan and Ray interactions
Puppet!Ray: End of Everything: continuation of FNAF AU.  This time the Henry scene at the end of FNAF 6.  The fic I got to use the tag ‘is it still fluff if everyone dies’ on.  TW: Hinted Unsympathetic Patton because of who he replaces
And They Were Roommates - a hurt/comfort fic writen for the sanders gift exchange last year.  LAMP fic, nonbinary Dee, college AU, supportive boyfs all around
Prinxiety Prompt - takes place post DWIT, Virgil and Roman talking/flirting
Moxiety, Mobster Patton - again, nuff said.  no death, actually pretty fluffy for the prompt.  maybe a little kidnapping?
Movie Night: cute fluffy LAMP
Logan Prevents A Murder: QPP Analogical, Virgil debating murdering Roman
The Bane of Protectiveness: Ray was there when Roman....and she couldn’t stop him   TW: Suicide, Self-deprecation, self-hatred
MM3: The Murder: based of a Murder Mystery from a discord server, how Talyn’s death played out  TW: death, murder, vomiting, planned murder, drugging a drink, Unsympathetic Logan
How Ray Became Anxiety: Little clip from an au of mine where Ray becomes anxiety, along with keeping protectiveness. TW: character death, Virgil ducks out, Patton and Roman are jerks
Fighting the Dragon Witch isn’t Therapy: after POF, Roman will do anything to prove himself  TW: Temporary Major Character Death
Random Fandom One Shots
Peter Meets Angel - short one shot about my oc meeting Peter (Marvel)
Mitsue Goes Off:  Mitsue was already having a bad day, so when the LOV kidnaps her, she’s going to give them a piece of her mind (MHA)
We Have Mic - Mic gets kidnapped, Aizawa has something to say bout that (MHA)
Scar to Remember - Overhaul left a mark on Mitsue (MHA)
Demise Of A Gamer (DR) - Chp5 of SDR2 from Chiaki’s Pov
Friends Protect Each Other- Tubbo goes to visit Tommy during his exile...and finds Dream with him  TW: manipulative Dream
Original Writing
Saving The Moon - a short story I wrote for a contest a few years back
Never Trust A Newbie- short story written for a writing camp
The Hug Wizard- if you know, you know
Spiritfarer Hug Wizard: o w o
Soulmates Don’t Have to Be Romantic (finished :D )
my platonic soulmates series, starring my oc Ray
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Soulmate GC
Based off my soulmate story, a gc with the members messing w/ each other. Crack fic.
Chp 1
Chp 2
Bad Things Happen Bingo
The Collector - Logan collects people. TW: U!Logan, Kidnapping, Taxidermy on a person, blunt force trauma, character death, implied use of a date rape drug, major character death
Pressure Doesn’t Always Make A Diamond: Reminding a side for their mistakes was never a good idea.  Especially when they feel guilty about it like Patton did.  TW: Unsympathetic Deceit, Unsympathetic Logan, constant guilt-tripping, self-hatred, self-deprecation, blaming someone for something that isn’t their fault 
 He’s Not Yours: Patton’s parents....aren’t the best  TW: emotional abuse, yelling, numbness
Keeping Them Pure: Patton just wanted to make sure his kiddos wouldn’t get corrupted by those nasty dark sides  TW: Unsympathetic Patton, Kidnapping, Forced holding, chains
The Past Can Haunt You: Remus keeps getting left by those he cares about  TW: Abandonment, Self deprecation, Childhood Trauma,  the split, implied unsympathetic light sides
Snakes Don’t Like the Cold: Dee is part snake...so what happens when he gets trapped in a freezer  TW: Unsympathetic Roman, locked in a freezer, hypothermia
All It Takes Is One Mistake: It’s very easy for the Ego to crack  TW: Roman angst ,cracks, roman needing to talk to people
A Game of Paranoia: Something seems off to Rantaro as he goes through this game
You Just Need a Push to be Good: Patton couldn’t let those dark sides keep corrupting Thomas  TW: Unsympathethic Patton, using shock collars as punishment
‘I’m Fine’ And Other Lies: Introduction of Mitsue, my bnha oc.  Mitsue gets hurt in a fight and doesn’t realize how bad it is until it’s too late  TW: mention of blood, hospitals
They Never Saw It Coming: a small one shot with my own sides.  Warning, the title is a really bad pun.  TW: graphic eye injury
The Collector: What Happened Before: a sort of prequel to The Collector, Patton thinking over what happened TW: hypnotism, mind control, U!Logan
Replaceable?: takes place post POF, Logan’s reaction to what Janus did 
Those Left Behind: Ray was there when Virgil left them
You’ll See: From my given to Overhaul AU: Why Mitsue works with Overhaul  TW: Forced Starvation, Kidnapping, Parents not caring
Why Roman’s Sword Isn’t Allowed In the Common Room: All I’m gonna say is this is not as much as a crack fic as it sounds. TW: stabbing, coughing up blood, fighting
Scar To Remember: Mitsue wasn’t left okay after Overhaul got a hold of her
We Have Mic: Someone kidnaps Mic to get to Aizawa.  TW: Kidnapping
Don’t Hurt Ray Or Else: Even while with the lights, Virgil is going to protect his sister  TW: Morally Grey/Unsympathetic Patton, Outing Someone, not Accepting someone,  Transphobia?, mentions of fighting someone
Even In The Face Of Death, Logan Ignores His Feelings - a day to relax goes wrong when Remus decides to mess with Logan  TW: blood, stabbing
Trapped- Virgil gets kidnapped while out in the imagination.  It doesn’t go well. TW: kidnapping, panic attack, flashbacks, claustrophobia, implied pranking, implied fighting
Who Knew Sleep Paralysis Could Be Deadly?- Talent Swap AU with Makoto and Kyoko  TW: stabby stab, K-nife, sickness, sleep paralysis
Kokichi’s Sacrifice - Kokichi’s POV of Chp 4  TW: major character death, strangulation
A Well Needed Lesson - Byakuya has had enough of the Ultimate Lucky Student, Kyoko responds in return
Oh Look, A Yandere - Mic gets kidnapped by a yandere and has to try to escape TW: Yandere, kidnapping
Bad Things Happen Bingo Part 2: New Card, New Category
To Manipulate A Protector -Orange goes after Virgil? Or is that just a trick? TW: Kidnapping, implied fighting, manipulation, being controlled
Some Apologies Go Nowhere - after chp 4, Kokichi tries to apologize to Shuichi. Key word there is try
No One Noticed...- What if Shiro hadn’t been the only one Replaced? TW: Abandonment, heavy doubt, replaced and not noticed
Of All People Why’d it have to be Deku? - Bakugou and Midoryia switch bodies. Chaos ensues. TW:… cussing I guess?
A Broken Disc- Spoilers for the March 1st Tommyinnit Stream  TW: Major Character Death, Attempted Manipulation, Flashbacks
not again...: Nagito gets kidnapped...again  TW: kidnapping, locked in small place
Goodbye Green- Who ever said the Creativity twins were supposed to be separated?  TW: Morally Grey Patton, having to leave someone you care about
One Step Behind: Phil’s POV of what happened that fateful day  TW: Major Character Death, Stabbing, Bleeding Out, Explosions
Adrien’s Realization
Lila Bashing fic where Adrien finally realizes that ‘Hey what Lila is doing to me isn’t good’
Chp 1-  TW: Unrequited flirting, unrequited crush, Lila hate(?)
Chp 2- TW:Self doubt, bad advice
Another Path
After All Might tells Izuku he can’t be hero, Izuku decides it might be better to take another path to help people. Planned mix of actual story and chat fic
TW: slight All Might bashing
Prologue
Chp 1
Chp 2
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savnofilter · 3 years
Text
TW: MENTIONS OF DISCOURSE, GR//MING, P/D/PHILIA, ASS//LT, C//NSENT, D//RK CONTENT.
- this isnt under a read more because i want people to read this, but please read past this/tread carefully if you cannot handle such topics. this is not meant to be interacted with.
I'm not sure how to really go about this. I've been overthinking if I should address this and bring up some stuff while I've been gone, so sorry the absence. I deleted the tumblr app a few days ago and I downloaded it again today so i could post this. I really don't like making posts like this because it cuts the vibe that I've been trying to portray that everything is okay and it makes me feel really disconnected to you guys. I am sorry for the abrupt absence and cutting off any source of communication between us. I knew if I left any form of direct line of talk to me that I would receive hate and I just mentally decided that I cant sit through being harassed right now.
Have you guys ever paid attention to the same people who always have a statement to say or is always in discourse? It's very telling how everyone can post about me, but I shouldnt dare post about them. I'm tired of not being able to post about what I want without people vague posting about me, bringing me up every time they start another discourse with another writer or directly talking about me. My days on here are starting to feel the same. Its good then it goes bad. Good goes bad and bad goes good. It's not even tiring, annoying, or angering -- its repetitive. When I'm not saying anything people create fake stories about me, and when i speak about it im the one starting discourse. Don't get me wrong, I'm nowhere near perfect and I have made my own mistakes. But why the fuck am I always being told to be the mature one, why am I the one who should've done better, why do you people expect so much from me. It's the fact people are always quick to say, "no one cares about you, youre fishing for attention" when they're the ones who vague and interact with me while ive been minding my business for months now. Hm. The fact people have me proudly blocked but still harass me anyways shows a lot about themselves than it does for me. How its such an issue that im a minor until it comes to demonizing, tearing down my character, gaslighting, lying and bullying. I'm a literal example of how their friend group manipulates their followers and exiles people from fandoms for not kissing their ass. except now its in your face.
Consider this my last post about this discourse. I'm not going to waste my time on people who fail to digest other peoples thoughts and opinions time and time again because theyre weak narcissists. If I so choose to decide to shit post my opinions or argue with someone, none of you should be aggravated or moved by it because youre not even supposed to be on my page. If its not something serious i will not be wasting energy that i can be using to build on myself as a growing person than on miserable old ladies that have to use fanfiction to have excitement in their pity, depressing and lackluster lives. If people so do choose to create stories or vague about me, I do not care. So I ask respectfully to people who do lurk on my page to not attempt to message, post or vague about me please. This includes sending anons to yourself to make shit happen.
Past that, something got me thinking. My (older) friend had showed me screenshots of adult writers (no one i have spoken to) that were very excited to write underaged reader with adult characters. There are other instances where writers (that you have probably read from) on here openly made reader underage while aging characters up as adults/with adults. There are many more but there's really no point in listing them nor do I really care. But least to say, the same people who are gung-ho over these pedophilic themes/stories are the same people who support predatory people.
I've been thinking about whether or not i should continue writing for the students anymore. Granted, I still think they're attractive because one snap of the fingers cant stop that. I had been teetering on this thought for awhile because of how borderline pedophilic the people are here towards my age group. I enjoy writing but not to the point of willingly being in a straight line of sight where people who are well over 16 are harassing me and lurking on my page, especially to other minors solely because they are my friends. Backtracking to the statement before, I honestly dont know if I will either stop writing or just for the students as a whole. It shows that clearly some people are using their attraction to teens with the excuse that the characters are fake. The rapid normalization on dark problematic "kinks" is disgusting and vile, and the fact that its discourse now to shame said interests is appalling. Concluding that combined with my experiences here, i feel unsafe.
***(TRIGGER WARNING)*** I dont talk about my personal life on here that much cause I dont see the need too nor do i think its anyone's business. Paired with the fact that the people i have trusted personal information with have used it against me, I will be preventing myself from opening that door. Besides that for now, I have sparsely shared I've been assaulted before. This is my first time really opening up about this and i kind of find it necessary now. Coming from someone who has been a victim of assault and CP by people my age and well over, writing nsfw has been the only way where I could feel comfortable with sex in general. I won't get into details because mentioning this is triggering already and can make people uncomfortable. It feels like anywhere I go, I'm constantly putting myself in a position to be abused. The same people who told me I didn't have to worry about my age and be judged for it, exposed the minimum comfort of keeping myself private online to demonize, judge and hurt me. People call me "extra" for being distraught about my face and age being posted because they think im trying to be sneaky which isn't the case. Its the principle that they KNEW I wasnt ready to share said things, and coming from someone who is inherently a private and closed person, she knew damn well what she was doing when posting screenshots of me on Tumblr. There is no excuse for it. The same writers who write dub/non-con can BARELY understand basic consent and its fucking terrifying. This site was the only other place I could cope without being criticized. To see people who some i was close to proudly lie on my name, (adults) say that i sent them pornographic content without their consent is so very hurtful. To watch people supposedly be victims and then use their own trauma to invalidate my own was so fucking humiliating, disgusting and nerve wracking. Although I knew I made the terrible decision to interact with stories, I have never initiated any NSFW discussion with anyone in DMs unless they did it with me first and a few times -- and trust me raise your hand I'll show you the proof. I was sure that everyone I talked to regularly knew that I was a minor, and to my general consensus, people were under the impression I was 15/16 (which I was and am).***
Whether it be victim blaming from the grooming discourse, I've been met with racism, harassment towards my friends, people wanting me to harm myself and be assaulted. I fear what will happen when i will turn 18, if the harassment will escalate and what not. A big part of me is that I'm still here anyways because it pisses people off and I don't care when I receive hate. I can take it but I don't want it. A good conscious of me knows that I should be doing what's best for me but at the end I'm still attached to my ego-self with the added fact that I sincerely enjoy interacting with my followers and posting stories.
I just don't know how the options look. I'll probably be updating my blog rules as of right now. I've been writing more sfw lately because of this and it'd be nice if you guys supported those until I properly decide. I still have plenty of requests of a bunch of characters (mostly Bakugo and Dabi) and original stuff (all sfw & nsfw) that I really wanna share with you guys. But I just ask that what I do modify that you will respect it like you would to any other writer on here.
Stay safe, keep your mask on, and thank you.
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tangledbea · 4 years
Text
Blinded By Destiny
A Blind Dark Prince AU Fanfic
Fandom: Tangled/ Tangled the Series Word Count: 2592
Ever since he was a boy, Eugene had been taught that it was the duty and the destiny of the Dark Kings and their Brotherhood to guard the Moonstone. Or, more precisely, to keep people away from it for their own good. They performed this duty to the forfeit of all else. Only the royal line was expected to get married. And while the rest of the Brotherhood wasn’t required to stay celibate, any relations they took on could not interfere with their duties.
It seemed to Eugene that this wasn’t fair.
Over the past twenty-odd years, he’d watched his father literally drive people away, sending the residents of the kingdom into what he liked to call “soft exile” to protect them from the magical stone that took up residence in the heart of the castle. Quirin, Adira and Hector shared comradery with himself and their king, not to mention Eugene’s best friend Lance (he’d gotten away with keeping him around by telling his dad that he wanted Lance to be the next member of the Brotherhood), but it was a lonely life for all of them. He missed people. Half the Brotherhood’s job was to go out and get supplies to bring back to the castle. Nothing grew in the barren lands around here. Not even grass. So even though there were six of them, most of the time it was half that.
It was three days before Eugene’s 21st birthday that he decided something needed to be done. He was a man of action, especially when it was important to him, and he was tired of living like this. Tired of being confined to the kingdom, practicing his fighting skills so that he could protect a glowing rock that no one was coming after. Tired of wondering where the hell he was ever supposed to get a bride if the only woman around was at least twice his age, like a member of his family, and also not remotely interested in him in that way (not that he was interested in Adira, either).
“I’m telling you, Lance, there’s got to be a way,” he said to his best friend as they strolled through the halls. Every now and then, it occurred to him all over again that if he really thought about it, living in a nearly-empty castle that was penetrated all over by black spikes so smooth and reflective you could potentially use them as a mirror was creepy as hell.
“Maybe there is,” Lance countered, “but you’d think if that was the case, someone in the last two hundred years would have figured out how and done it!”
“Not if they weren’t looking for it!” Eugene rebuted. “Nowhere in my history lessons has it said anything about anyone trying to destroy it, just that it couldn’t be done. Which, I guess, means that someone has tried, but no one bothered to write down what they did try, and I don’t know of anyone except my dad and… and my mom…” His pace slowed for a step or two before resuming at the previous speed. It had been fifteen years since the Queen had tried to destroy the Moonstone, and died doing so. That had been the catalyst that had caused King Edmund to send almost everyone away.
“And what makes you think that you’re the one who can do it?” his friend protested. “You lost your mom because she tried. What makes you different?”
“Because, Lance,” Eugene threw him a cocky grin. “It’s my destiny.”
Lance barked a laugh, the sound reverberating around his chest. “Your destiny?!  Ha! What, you think because you’re the prince of a rundown kingdom that your destiny is to destroy a magical artifact that’s thousands of years old and attacks anyone who goes near it?”
“No, it’s my destiny because what else could it be? Generations of Dark Kings have been leading up to me! I’m devastatingly handsome, charming, skilled, brave, intelligent, and I have a tragic backstory! How does that not make me the perfect protagonist for this story? The brave, handsome prince overcomes impossible odds to free his kingdom from the death and servitude of the dreaded Moonstone!”
Another guffaw reverberated off the walls from Lance, the sound warm and pleasant, bringing a little life to the otherwise desolate halls. “Oh wait, you’re serious,” Lance realized, sobering instantly. “Eugene, this isn’t some story! This is real life, with real consequences!”
“Oh, come on, Lance, where’s your sense of adventure? Can you imagine all the gratitude and glory that would come with it?” Eugene challenged. “I know I’ll be fine, because you’ve got my back!”
“Oh, now you’re dragging me into it?” Lance huffed.
“Is that a ‘no’?”
“Of course it’s not a ‘no,’ don’t be stupid. I’m not letting you have all the gratitude and glory! We just need a plan.”
“We’ve got a few days to come up with one,” Eugene informed him. “I am not turning another year older with all this still looming over my head.”
~*~*~
“You’re telling me that that thing blew off your dad’s arm and outright killed your mom, and the only plan you’ve come up with in two days is, ‘grab it with your bare hand’?!” Lance demanded, his voice an incredulous hiss. He didn’t trust the statues of Eugene’s ancestors not to tattle on them as they made their way across the room towards the Moonstone Chamber.
“No,” Eugene snapped back. “There’s more to it than that! And it won’t be my bare hand, I’ve got leather gloves and armored gauntlets--”
“Great, so you can get shards of metal shrapnel stuck in your hand when it tries to blow you up.”
“--and I’ve nicked Adira’s sword.” Eugene brandished the black rock blade, tilting and turning it in so that the deep blue etched lines glinted in the light.
“You got your hands on Shadowblade?!” This time it was awe that laced Lance’s voice and features rather than incredulity. “She’d never let anyone hold that sword but her! How’d you manage to get it away from her? She’s so cunning and alert and prepared and fast and strong and--”
“Yeah, yeah, you think she’s amazing--”
“I know she’s amazing.”
“-- but everyone’s gotta sleep sometime. And it just so happens that your best friend has been practicing. Adira’s not the only one who can move silently anymore.” He flipped the sword cockily, with the flair of a true adventurer. “She’ll never miss it. We’ll be in and out, no harm done.”
“I hope you’re right, buddy. Because this still seems like a bad idea to me.”
“Don’t you worry. I’ve gone one more trick up my sleeve.”
The Moonstone Chamber was enormous, though it was difficult to tell exactly how big it was. It had been formed by the Moonstone itself, centuries ago, and the castle had been built around it as a fortification. The walls were lined with the same black rock spikes as the ones that covered not only the castle, but the whole of the Dark Kingdom, and were so pitch black that it was impossible to tell how high the ceiling or low the floor that fell away from the ledge which was almost all that remained of the manmade floor were. All Eugene knew was that the lava that ran under the castle didn’t touch this room. He was pretty sure the black rocks could resist even that high heat.
In the center of the room, on a pillar surrounded by more of the black rocks, a cage-like orb sat, rotating gently on its axis. And in the center of the orb, glowing brightly enough to illuminate the immediate area, was the Moonstone. And leading to that pillar was a narrow bridge with no handrails.
“No problem,” he said out loud, reassuring both himself and Lance of the task at hand. But then, he sat down, right in front of that bridge.
“Uhhhhhh, Eugene? What are you doing?”
“Letting it get used to me being here,” he explained. “That last trick up my sleeve? I’m gonna sweet talk it.”
“... … … You’re gonna sweet talk the Moonstone?” Lance clarified. “That’s crazy! It’s not a person! You can’t sweet talk it!”
“I don’t think you’re right. Dad says it gets into people’s heads, tells them things. I don’t think it’s completely… without personality. And if it’s got a personality, it can be flattered.”
“Okay, this I gotta see,” Lance snorted. “Have fun on your date with the Moonstone!”
Eugene dismissed him with a soft, “Pfft,” before settling down. He rested Shadowblade across his knees, almost like an offering. And…
… Okay, now that he was sitting here - especially with an audience - he felt kind of foolish. He wasn’t sure exactly what to say or how to go about implementing his plan, or if the Moonstone would even listen to him. But he had to try. Adira had taught him how to still his mind and quiet his thoughts, letting none of them escape the inner sanctum of his mind. He focused for a while on the light shining through the holes in the protective shield, then let his caramel brown eyes slide closed.
“Honored Moonstone,” he began, his tone reverent, “I am His Royal Highness, Crown Prince Horace Eugene of the Dark Kingdom, Member of the Brotherhood.” Mentioning that last part made the back of his left hand itch, right where his Brotherhood mark was. He wondered if that meant something, or if his mind was playing tricks on him. “But you probably already know me, huh?” he mused and grinned charmingly across the distance, as if the mystical stone had eyes and could see him and swoon from it. “I’ve come to pay my respects, and to understand you better. My father, King Edmund, says that you speak to him, and I was wondering what great knowledge and wisdom you pass onto him.”
“Uhhh, Eugene? Something’s happening,” Lance intoned.
Eugene opened his eyes, and the first thing he noticed was that the light was growing brighter. But then he realized that it was actually the black rock sphere that was retreating from around its precious contents. With a start, he got to his feet.
“I think it’s working!” Lance stage whispered. “Keep going!”
He licked his lips and tugged the armored gauntlet to fit more snugly on his hand as he considered what to say next. “You’ve been around for millenia! You must know the secrets of the universe! So wise and so powerful. But you can trust me! I think I’m the one you’ve been waiting for!”
He hesitated a moment more, then took a step out onto the bridge, then another. In his right hand, he gripped Shadowblade. His left, he left empty to grab the stone. His mark continued to itch, and he continued to wonder if there was relevance to it.
The glow was beautiful, brilliantly blue and white, and so bright it was like staring at a star that filled the room. He reached out. “I only want to know your secrets.” Like the secret of how to destroy you.
His hand closed around the Moonstone, and the instant it did, it was like white hot fire burning, all the way through the gauntlet and glove. He cried out in anguish and alarm but his fingers would not uncurl.
Deceiver! Curse your eyes!
He wasn’t sure if the voice was in the room, or only in his head, but the pain in his hand was suddenly in his skull, and he managed to release both the Moonstone and the sword in order to hold his head, squeezing his eyes shut with the pain of it. Still crying out in agony, he could feel the energy of the Moonstone thrumming through him, crackling off his skin like electricity. For a moment, all he saw was white, and then he saw nothing at all as he collapsed to the ground. His ears were ringing so loudly he could barely hear Lance calling his name. He didn’t dare try to get up, didn’t dare move, and wasn’t sure he’d be able to if he tried.
Lance skidded to a stop beside him, gathering Eugene up with one arm and grabbing Shadowblade with the other hand. All around them, the room was trembling and rumbling, and he knew that nothing about that was good. New black rocks began to spring out of the walls and up through the floor, piercing the bridge they’d come in on. “We gotta move now!” Lance yelled, and hauled his best friend onto the bridge. No way were they staying on this spike-ridden pedestal.
Each pounding footstep brought him closer to the safety of the exit, but the road wasn’t without hazard. The narrow bridge began to crumble under Lance’s boots, and he was finding it increasingly difficult to juggle a half-conscious Eugene and Adira’s sword. In a snap decision, he hurled the blade the rest of the way across the gap, sending it spinning across the floor towards the door, and readjusted his grip on Eugene, mid-run.
“Not good, not good, not good, not good…!” he panted as he dodged dangerous spikes and falling rocks. A huge boulder came loose from the ceiling, and he got himself and Eugene to safety just before it hit the bridge, decimating the last of it and sending it all falling into the pit below. Back on its pedestal, the Moonstone was once again encased in the cage-like orb.
Not waiting to see what would happen if they stayed, Lance kicked the sword the rest of the way through the doorway and ran through himself, slamming the heavy door behind him and leaning on it. There was a crash from inside the Moonstone Chamber that made the floor tremble and Lance flinch. His anxiety heightened when King Edmund and the Brotherhood arrived at the other end of the Hall of Kings.
“What happened?!” Edmund demanded before spotting the position Lance was in. His demeanor changed immediately from fury to alarm. “Horace! My son!” He hurried over to the two young men relieving Lance of Eugene’s supine body, and Lance realized it was his job to explain what had just happened.
“He thought he could destroy the Moonstone,” he explained softly. “He wanted to free the kingdom and all of us from its tyranny.”
“Is he alive?” Hector wondered, peering at Eugene’s face.
As if in response, Eugene groaned and stirred in Edmund’s arms.
“Son!” the king breathed, elated. He gathered Eugene up into a hug as best he could. “I thought I’d lost you!”
“Dad…?” Eugene’s voice was froggy, and he blinked and opened his eyes at last. The Brotherhood and Lance gasped. No more were his eyes the color of whisky in the firelight. The electric blue of the Moonstone filled both iris and pupil of each eye. “Dad, where are you? I can’t see you.”
“I’m right here, Horace. I’ve got you,” the king assured him.
“Wait, you’re holding me? But I can’t-- I can’t see you! I can’t see anything!” Eugene felt panicked. He wanted to flail out, try to feel his way around his immediate area, but he was exhausted and ached to the bone. He was sure he couldn’t even stand right now.
Deceiver! Curse your eyes!
Had that been the Moonstone that had said that? Had it deliberately attacked his eyes instead of killing him?
“The prince is blind!” Quirin’s voice reached Eugene’s ears, and his veins filled with ice cold dread.
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bard-llama · 3 years
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WiP List
This is gonna be looooong (like, REALLY long), so I’mma go ahead and give you a cut here. But if you’re interested in what i’m working on, take a look!
Order purely based on the order my tabs are in. I’m only counting WiPs that actually have more than a paragraph written, because if I didn’t, this list would be even longer. Also, pls don’t judge me but what I name my WiPs 😂
Post-Coital Smoke
Kinda what it sounds like tbh. I just wanted Iorveth getting high and admiring Roche’s body and then Roche decided to be a tease. At some point, I assume there will be sex.
Angst: Sex object Roche
Iorveth’s POV of realizing that Roche hurts himself whenever he flirts at Iorveth. Premise is that Roche has been groomed (intentionally or not) by Foltest to be his. So when he feels attraction towards Iorveth, he needs to be punished. And obviously Iorveth helps him learn that no, that’s not okay and idk recovery???
Midwinter Feast
This idea was 100% spawned by me trying to write holiday fics, but Foltest hosts a Midwinter Feast where they close the city for 12 days, leaving Roche to get along with the Nonhuman/Scoia’tael(ish) delegation during that time. Also, Foltest might be using the feast as a delaying tactic to resupply his army. I legit have no idea where this is going, I just thought the idea of Roche and Iorveth stuck at a feast for 12 days was funny.
Solstice Feast aka To Birth a Verdant Future
This was actually an xmas gift for @lutes-and-dandelions, but I havent finished it yet 😓 But the premise is similar to the former in that it’s another solstice feast. But it’s set post-W3 with Emhyr as Emperor throwing a party in the new conquered capital of Vizima. Roche broods a lot about Foltest’s memory and how he hates Emhyr and decides to distract himself by hanging out with Iorveth and suggesting they follow an old elven tradition. And that’s all I’ll say. XD
Next Year (Solstice Feast sequel)
Literally set the next year. This time they merge their lives by merging their people’s traditions.
Lily Preserved in Amber
Okay, haven’t gotten very far in this, but I decided it was an elven rite of passage to go searching through the forest for a sign of your future. And Iorveth finds a piece of amber with a lily preserved inside. I haven’t decided if it purely means Roche or if it means his whole family with Roche and Boussy and Anais and all. So far, he hasn’t even found the amber yet lmao. But he did just discover music!
Character taking control of the other and Character B just letting go and enjoying themselves
Under the subheading “Porn Snips”, so uh, yeah. Starts with Roche and Iorveth fighting to decide who gets to top, involves Roche getting choked, and Iorveth ripping Roche’s pants off. Oh, also, they’re currently at a fancy party hiding somewhere in the garden lmao
Based on @moonlights-ordinance‘s art
Moonlight’s working on an adorable piece where Roche leans his forehead against Iorveth’s back between his shoulderblades. I decided to make it post-W3 with both of them working as paper pushers/administrators under Emhyr’s Temeria. And Nilfgaard does not believe in chairs with backs (or, really, Emhyr wanted to see how long Roche’s pride would make him suffer. It’s a long time). The idea is to show development over time as they slowly get more comfortable with touch and start using each other as backrests. And then the sweet scene Moonlight is drawing.
Eliza for @useless-empty-brain aka Can’t We All Just Get Oolong?
Next is Iorveth’s POV, but I legit cannot figure out where to start. But we’re gonna see some of his thoughts (like how Eliza volunteered him to stay in Vizima for an unspecified period of time and he said yes even though he can’t and now has to commute regularly because he doesn’t want to miss tea with Roche but also doesn’t want Roche’s spies to catch on lmao) and his curiosity about Roche and Foltest and what Roche’s mission is (which I... totally know.)
Roche’s Scars
@moonlights-ordinance sent me a great pic of a mod for Roche where he had some pretty vicious scarring/mutilation. So of course I decided I needed to tell the story of each one. But really, it’s a story about the stages of acceptance with scars. Both Iorveth and Roche start out hiding theirs, but eventually come to reveal them comfortably in public.
Vernon Roche of the Scoia’tael aka The Value of a Man
Does my title give it away? Oops? So, this is a found family fic where Roche is captured by the Scoia’tael and the elves and dwarves slowly come to see him as - well, I was gonna say human, but as a person, I guess. And start feeling really, really guilty, especially when some not great things happen to Roche. 
Oh also, Foltest is a giant dick and uh, SPOILERS he does not try to get Roche back. Which leads to a whole subplot that will end with a found family for EVERYONE, because they all deserve to be happy dammit.
All of that was just one document lmao. I have 24 documents, some of which have quite a few WiPs in them. 😱
Kiss Prompts
24. Deep kisses where they have their hands tangled in each other’s hair to pull them closer. AKA How to Fluster an Elf
When I got the idea for How to Fluster an Elf, I decided it was gonna fill the prompt dammit. And then it really, really expanded on me.
33. An unexpected kiss that shocks the one receiving it.
Roche dreams occasionally that Iorveth visits him and watches over him and sometimes speaks, but he can’t understand Elder Speech, so he assumes it’s all gibberish.
Then he finds out it’s not and suddenly he’s not so certain it’s a dream
16. One person pouting, only to have it removed by a kiss from the other person.
Okay, I literally just need to buckle down and write some good kissing. This is set in (Im)Perfect Strangers and Iorveth is pouting about them leaving the gardens, so Roche makes it up to him.
25. Wet kisses after finding refuge from the rain.
This one won’t actually be published with the kisses ‘cause it’s porn and the rest are T-rated lol. Buuuut Roche and Iorveth are trying to have a secret liaison in the forest when the rain starts. Featuring nature magic, tentacles, and Iorveth getting filled.
Scenes from Another World (aka AU premise)
Old Men in Vergen
Set during Witcher 3, but with an established relationship. Roche comes to visit Iorveth in Vergen to ask for advice on leading an insurgency. Iorveth just wants to feed Roche while he can now that he’s not the one starving in the woods.
Language Aphasia/Deal with the Devil
I wanted to write Gaunter! So I decided that Gaunter is in a mood for some mischief (he calls it being generous) and comes upon a traveling Vernon Roche who wishes that he could be understand Iorveth. Then Iorveth’s Scoia’tael find a passed out Roche in the woods and bring him to Iorveth for judgement. Only somehow, Roche only understands Elder Speech now. He can’t understand Common at all. The Scoia’tael find this very offensive and Iorveth is mostly freaked out that someone who can do THAT was wandering around his forest.
Bunk Beds: The Portrait of Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon
Based on a silly comic, Ciri convinces Iorveth and Roche to try to help her destroy the portrait. Geralt gets pissed and sends them to Bunk Bed Exile. Shenanigans ensue and somehow they start to get along.
Iorveth’s Scoia’tael Giving Him Shit For His Taste in Men aka The Lovestruck Fox
Right now, working on a piece from the POV of a new Scoia’tael recruit who is discovering that Iorveth’s Scoia’tael roast the fuck out of him over his crush on Roche. 
Speaking of, anyone have suggestions on prime roast material? I am not this creative.
Let’s Torture Roche!
No, really. This one is pretty dark. And told in kind of a different style than my usual, because I felt like it. So, premise is that Iorveth and Roche were a thing in the past, but then Roche was recalled to Foltest’s side and he went. So Iorveth is understandably pretty hurt and pissed (this was decided for a prompt of someone breaking down as soon as they’re behind closed doors). Buuut what he doesn’t know is that Roche is not with Foltest of his own volition. Hostages, blackmail, and torture are all involved and Foltest is a pretty horrible guy. But of course we need a happy ending, so eventually, Iorveth will rescue Roche and they get to recover together.
Life Debt aka Iorveth is an Asshole
The concept for this was that Roche saved Iorveth’s life and now that they were no longer enemies (set during Witcher 3), his honor demands that he follow Roche around until he can repay the favor. Featuring Iorveth being a trolling asshole, correcting the new Temerian Loyalist’s fighting abilities, and Roche being very, very tired. 
In application, it’s mostly angst so far, ‘cause I had to set up HOW Roche saved Iorveth’s life. And then I decided to really hurt Iorveth. But tbh I will probably skip ahead after establishing this stuff, because I just want shenanigans.
King and Country
I’ve got several WiPs for this one, including the Stripes’ recruitment, their decision to change sides, the Stripes being double agents, and of course, Iorveth and Roche’s developing relationship. But hey, I’ve skipped ahead to writing their wedding already, so... you know it ends happily ever after?
Friday Fight Night for Jan 29 (which I did not make oops)
So, this actually turned into a long piece that’s gonna be part of my Chronic Pain series. Basically, King Foltest is treating with the leaders of the Scoia’tael in Temeria and Iorveth is one of them. Unfortunately, he’s having a REALLY BAD pain day, but he’s also determined to be there to represent his people. Roche helps him see sense. Possibly forcefully.
Exhaustion Prompts
“If we’re both in this state, we both really screwed up somewhere huh?”
Iorveth and Roche are trapped in a dream and I got a little stuck creating the creature that trapped them there. But pretty sure Saskia is gonna interrupt their flirting by saving them.
“You were almost dead from pushing it too far!”
In which Roche has a heart attack from too much coffee. Yeah. He’s okay, though! But PT is about to blow a gasket and coffee will very much be disallowed.
Found Family Prompts
Taking Out the Trash for @useless-empty-brain
Literally a story about taking out the trash lmao. We’re gonna see if I can make this intersting.
Touch Starved for @mochii-girl
Honestly, haven’t gotten much done on this yet, but I’m thinking puppy pile cuddles in Corvo Bianco
Coffeeshop AU aka Brewing Romance and Dissent
Ooof I’ve got a lot of bits and pieces of this written, but nothing quite finished, except for the moment when things change from “we flirt as I order coffee” to “I make you special drinks and invite you to come visit me after hours”. Writing a canon coffeeshop au when I know shit all about coffee is HARD.
Curse Breaking
Omg this is one of the first WiPs I started for Iorveth/Roche, no joke. STILL WORKING ON IT! The premise is that Roche finds a feverish and dying Iorveth in an empty Scoia’tael camp, saves him with the power of True Love’s Kiss The Power of Strong Emotions, Like That Which You Might Have For Your Enemy. Then they team up to go save Iorveth’s Scoia’tael from a big bad mage and Roche invites Triss along for the ride, which totally doesn’t make Iorveth jealous. I kinda stalled out at the part where they reach the mage’s hideout and see the results of the mages failed experiments. On Iorveth’s people. It’s gonna hurt. A lot. But afterwards, there might be makeouts. And some sort of implication that they’re all down to do this (minus the horrible, traumatic parts) again.
Roche POV bloodplay
Roche’s POV starting from before his first encounter with Iorveth. Then he has a weirdly sexually arousing encounter with the elf, and tbh, that’s as far as I got. But Iorveth draws blood from Roche’s neck, presses his thumb to it, and then licks it off his thumb. Next, Iorveth was gonna be the one getting Uncomfortably Aroused, but I haven’t gotten that far. No idea where this is going overall.
Iorveth Investigates Roche
This kinda isn’t a real WiP in that idk if I’ll ever finish it. I mostly started it to do some worldbuilding about what public information there would be about Roche. 
Voyeurism AKA Eye on You
Yeah, I don’t have much for the next chapter yet, tbh. So premise is that Iorveth accidentally ends up watching Roche get off at the brothel and finds it really, really hot. Hot enough to get curious and go back for more. Next one is going to involve thigh fucking and Iorveth might possibly get pegged by Daph??? idk
Fake Relationship
Poor @lutes-and-dandelions has been waiting forever for this one and I can’t even find a place to end the scene and post what I have so far. Premise is that Iorveth and Roche are both investigating their missing men and the trail takes them to the Murivel Resort for Couples. So they go undercover. Featuring Roche’s POV of being doubtful, Iorveth using the excuse to flirt outrageously, strip gwent, and a magic amulet that hids Iorveth’s scar and that Roche hates.
Competitive Makeouts AKA The Chase
This was kissing practice and it turned into a casefic! Which is awesome because I love casefics even though I haven’t published any yet. So in this one, as Iorveth and Roche sneak off to makeout, they also end up investigating a conspiracy in the Temerian military. 
Iorveth/Roche(/Kayran) + Roche/Foltest aka Every Kiss Begins with Kayran
In which Roche accidentally walks in on Iorveth’s monthly fuck date with the Kayran and gets invited to join in. Then, somehow,  it starts to turn into a relationship. With an elf and a tentacle monster. And yet, somehow, this relationship is healthier than the one with Foltest. The contrast opens Roche’s eyes.
Pining and Poignards
In which Iorveth stabs Roche with his favorite knife and wants it back and is also maybe pining a lil bit. Meanwhile Roche is rather pissed, but also curious and begins to teach himself Elder Speech to try to read the inscription on Iorveth’s knife. I stalled out in the scene where Iorveth accidentally watches Roche masturbate in the bath.
Iorveth tittyfucking Roche
Look, it’s what it says on the tin. Roche’s POV of Iorveth’s fascination with his chest and how it makes him feel and then there is sex.
Dirty Gremlin Man
Iorveth gets off on Roche being a sweaty, stinky human. Roche pins Iorveth in a fight and Iorveth gets very distracted watching a drop of sweat trail down Roche’s face. So distracted, in fact, that he doesn’t think twice before stretching out his neck and licking it. Then, of course, he remembers where he is. Featuring a very confused Roche, a smidge of jealousy, and Iorveth stealing Roche’s sweaty clothing to do unspeakable things to it. And somehow they get together.
Want me to sit in your lap?
Geralt LEGIT says this to Roche like 5 mins into the Witcher 2 and it’s GREAT. So of course, I had to write a scene where he actually got to. This is set post Witcher 2 while Geralt, Triss, Roche, and Ves are headed back to Temeria. Triss offers Geralt a little stress relief - which involves warming Roche’s cock and watching Triss and Ves get to know one another.
Red is the Rose
So, Chapter 4 is set post-Witcher 2 and Iorveth is obsessing over the fact that the Rose of Remembrance still has not wilted. He wonders what might be possible, so when he hears a rumor that a certain Temerian Commander was taken captive by Dethmold...
Dethmold most definitely dies. But unfortunately, that doesn’t save Roche from the curses he cast. So they go looking for Geralt to find out how to fix it.
This has only been 9 of my documents, y’all. I think I have a problem.
De-Aged Fic aka The language of friendship is not words but meanings
Ugh, I lost my momentum on this one, which sucks, ‘cause the next chapter is so close to done. Iorveth just needs to do a little freaking out first. But then they will both be back to adults and have to DEAL with the fact that they made good friends and would kinda like that again. I think this fic is gonna be purely friendship for them, but they’re gonna get there.
Glory Hole
A fic for the @sugar-and-spice-witcher-bingo where Roche hears a rumor that some Scoia’tael go to this brothel on the outskirts of town and hey, he may as well check it out, right? By going undercover and working the glory hole, of course. He never ACTUALLY expected Iorveth would come, but his legendary mouth was enticing enough to draw the Scoia’tael commander out.
Snuggling
Thirteen “accidentally” handcuffs Iorveth and Roche together when they capture Iorveth. This leads to them lying on the cot in the Stripes’ holding cell, spooning. There is banter and tickling and escapes not attempted and also maybe some sex with Inexperience Iorveth (i say maybe because I already started the sex, but idk if it will fit in). 
Petals and Stripes
A weed is but an unloved flower
Okay, the Stripes are going to attempt to woo Iorveth during a battle. Also, there is a stabbing. And then a kidnapping. And then, miracle of miracles, someone actually tries talking!
One person's weed is another person's wildflower
Ves’s POV! She cleans up the mess her idiots make and terrifies the life out of one elven suitor, but first she’s gotta deal with her own conflicted feelings about her Boss, the guy she relies on to show her the shades of grey in the world, loving the elf she’s supposed to kill. 
After that, I’ve got 2 more fics planned in this ‘verse. One is gonna be a fluffy and/or sexy date after Iorveth and Roche have gotten together. The other is a Scoia’tael side story, featuring lots of gossip about the humans sending their Commander love letters.
Love Shack
The Better Part of Valor
Ugh, I’m stuck on the sex again. Roche is having a really shitty day, so he goes to the cabin and signals Iorveth that he wants a round. Iorveth offers gentle (for them) sex and praise. And at the end, there’s a very significant scene where Iorveth removes his bandana. Roche buries his fingers in Iorveth’s hair, but doesn’t actually see his face, as he’s laying on his stomach with Iorveth on top of him.
Medicine
The morning after! Roche wakes up to find Iorveth in the bath, facing away from him, and notices a new scar. Iorveth has to deal with actually revealing his scars in daylight and they discuss the significant differences in elven and human medicine. Hint: I turned my own medical procedures into elven medicine, so it’s pretty fucking good.
PWP Ovi
Set ambiguously late, maybe after Thou Art More Lovely and More Temperate. Iorveth and Roche explore what Roche can take. We start with overstimulation, go into consensual somnophilia, come inflation, breeding kink, and oviposition. Because elves reproduce by laying eggs, which is not at all the case purely because I started this WiP ages ago and was horny.
The Picture Says It All
There’s going to be 5 more pictures that Rinn draws for Iorveth. Next is Roche hard at work, hunched over a desk. Then we’re getting some shirtless Roche, for “research”, of course. Then Roche cuddling with PT and the rest of the team, about which Iorveth is not at all jealous. Then a face study of Roche during a fight and uh, Iorveth is uncomfortably turned on. And finally, a drawing of their cabin with a silhouette in the window. She knows.
Roche & Rinn: The Haunting of Barrack 8B
Oh man, I really want to finish the next chapter, because I already have the one after that done. But first, we get introduced to Adda! This ‘verse is going to feature Adda the White a lot more than any of my others have done so far and I’m very excited. Also, Silas continues to be terrified of the ghost and the ghost and Adda become girlfriends buddies.
Roche builds Iorveth a home
Set late in the ‘verse, after Roche knows his feelings, but they haven’t said them yet (not out loud, anyway). Iorveth takes a trip to go meet Saskia do things off screen and Roche ends up turning to his old hobby, carpentry, to keep himself from pining too obviously. So obviously he ends up builing Iorveth a solarium. And a pillow nest. And a scaffold so that flowers that blossom in the moonlight cover the glass and give them privacy.
I got stuck here because Rinn needs to give Roche a hint to get him to build the pillow nest, but I hadn’t developed Rinn and Roche’s relationship yet, so had to go back and do that. But eventually Iorveth returns and they have wonderful I’m-not-saying-it-but-i-love-you sex in the new pillow nest.
Foltest (WiP): Long Live the King
This is actually the last fic in the ‘verse, so I don’t want to give too much away. But actually, I haven’t figured out what the next chapter is, BUT I have the chapter after that started and it is GOOD, just you wait!! I’m very excited.
Don’t Cry For Me, Temeria
This ‘verse alone, I have 14 WiPs and a dozen more unwritten ideas.
(Im)Perfect Strangers
I am frustratingly stuck on this chapter. Theoreatically, we are going to have a check in on how the mountain and the rest of our cast is doing and then Roche launches his Wooing TM plan (aka dinner, gift, and dancing).
Between Two Fools
Yeah, Roche and Iorveth have very different understandings of what their gifts represent. There is some soft happiness and then a swift rug pulled out from under Iorveth’s feet, I’m afraid. BUT we are almost to the part where the two idiots sit down and actually talk properly.
Unlucky Number Thirteen
Not only do I have more of Thirteen’s story planned, but I have ideas for ALL the Stripes to have stories. We’ll see how that goes. But for now, Thirteen starts spying for Roche. A lot of still-nebulous stuff happens, including Thirteen’s first time, for which he asks Roche to help. Additionally, once we reach the (Im)Perfect Strangers timeline, Thirteen has a special story all his own. It involves learning to read and a secret I shall not yet reveal.
Silas
Like I said, all the Stripes are hopefully getting stories. But Silas’s is coming along nicely. He starts a new life as “Silas”, as a man, and joins the army. Boot camp is rough and awful and he’s not very good at any of it, but one day, Roche comes looking for a recruit. He needs a codebreaker to decipher Thirteen’s scouting reports (another one for pictures). So Silas joins the Stripes, but he’s still terrified that they’ll fnd out and think he’s been lying to them. Fortunately, they’ll be putting his fears to rest.
Stripes Sex aka Earning Your Stripes: The First Time
PT’s POV! The Stripes (pre-Silas) are all still getting comfortable with each other as a team. But Thirteen has known Roche the longest and in a specific capacity. So one evening when he needs to get out of his head, Thirteen asks Roche to dom him. PT is confused and scandalized and then jealous, but he gets to join in soon too. Meanwhile, Finch and Ves have fun with their bratty arsonist and Fenn is loving it.
break (v /brāk/): to destroy someone's resistance
This is very long and entirely build up to porn. And then lots of porn. A question during a random conversation leads Roche to make Iorveth ask him to take Iorveth utterly apart in a consensual non-consent fantasy set when they were still enemies in the forest.
Bath House
This was supposed to be a simple PWP where Roche talks dirty to Iorveth under his breath while the two of them are at the bathhouse with Boussy (who LOVES baths and brought them to the fancy bath house), Anais, and Thirteen (who HATE baths and react to water much like a cat). They kinda took over the story and there has been no dirty talk yet oops.
Iorveth POV: Tutti
Iorveth begins to reclaim his love for music and lets himself improvise and compose again. And he ends up writing a song that is the story of his and Roche’s romance.
Daggers, Dumplings, and Dresses
The Elihal/Hattori side story! Though we haven’t actually met Hattori yet. So far, Elihal is expounding on his past and his relationship with Iorveth (he used to make all of Iorveth’s fancy gowns for concerts). Elihal and Hattori won’t play a HUGE role in (Im)Perfect Strangers, but they will be appearing!
Ves and Ciaran aka The First Rule of Fight Club
Ves is stuck walking a very long way back to Vergen with the memory of Ciaran’s skin against her teeth. And even though elves lie like breathing, she can’t help thinking about what he said about Roche not being worth her loyalty. Slowly, she begins to work some things out.
Sex with Saskia/Dragonfucking
Yeah, it’s what it sounds like. Iorveth tells Roche that Saskia agreed to a threesome and where to meet, but he neglected to mention the rather large dragon that was currently rimming his ass. Roche gets distracted from his confusion by the hotness and watches Iorveth get fucked by a dragon (with 2 dicks to fit 2 holes, of course).
Come Inflation + Piss Play
Um. Yeah, it’s a PWP where Roche asks Triss for a potion that will make him come a lot. And then Iorveth wants more. No idea where it’s going, tbh.
Stripes vs Scoia’tael: Water Balloon Fight
Literally a water balloon fight. For morale.
Baby Mama
Uh, the title is a bit telling here oops. But let’s just say Iorveth and Roche go on vacation to the cabin on top of the mountain again when Iorveth is hit with the sudden extreme urge to breed. Roche is down, but at some point, they do actually need to talk.
King Roche aka fics where Roche is in charge and hates it. Some are more in line with this than others.
Post W3 Becoming Terrorists Together
Ah yes, the murder husbands fic. Literally, Roche gets stuck leading Temeria under Emhyr’s orders and he’s good at it, but he HATES it. Enter Iorveth, who both points out security flaws, joins Roche for a surprisingly unawkward bath, and proposes that they go hunting down war criminals on their own time. How can Roche say no?
Pre-W2 Ambassadorial AU
Different first meeting AU! In this one, Iorveth is sent as the elven ambassador to Temeria and it’s about as much fun as one might expect. Triss and Roche, the other outcasts amongst Temerian court, decide to befriend him. Well, try to anyway. idk where this is going, but it’s been fun. Also, Iorveth wears a fancy braid over his eye, because I said so. Also, I might be planning an OT3 porn scene at some point, because it turns out, elves are VERY sensitive to magic XD
Leap of Faith
Okay, yeah, this has nothing to do with King Roche, but it’s the doc I was working in when I got the idea. In this one, a mage captures Iorveth for Foltest and starts torturing him. Roche, without really thinking about it, decides the mage goes too far, so he kills them. Leaving him with an elven prisoner and a castle full of people who will consider him a traitor for that. They escape the city, but now Iorveth has gotta convince Roche that no, the King really won’t forget that whole murder and prisoner escape thing. 
The whole point of this fic was for me to write them jumping off a cliff lmao. When am I gonna get to that? Probably like last or second to last chapter, tbh. Which should be... after the next one? No, I lied, it’s next chapter! I need to get on that!
An ill-favour’d thing, sir, but mine own aka Possessive Sex
Piss Fic
Um. Yeah. Roche is really horny when Iorveth gets home and is on him immediately, which is great, but Iorveth has gotta piss. Which becomes less urgent as Roche is determined to have his face fucks, but after he comes all over Roche’s face, it’s VERY urgent and Roche is a fucking brat and won’t move out of the way. So obviously the response to this is to piss on Roche’s crotch - which Roche is apparently more than okay with.
Cum Dumpster Roche
Yeah, this one doesn’t have much yet, I literally just wanted Roche getting railed and claimed and L O V I N G it. 
Possessiveness
Iorveth spends a lot of time thinking about his enemy, his nemesis. He’s researched Roche extensively, spent hours thinking up tactics and strategies to outwit his nemesis. He literally knows what Roche named his stupid weapons, but he’s never actually met Roche.
But he’s dreamt about it. The Roche in reality doesn’t look like the assumptions he made in his dreams, but who cares about looks? Because Roche is his, and certainly not some dh’oine king’s.
Tentacles + Breeding
Gods, this one is SO CLOSE to being done dammit, I just gotta finish it!! But it’s a fun one. Iorveth and Roche are fighting, when Iorveth suddenly starts fighting plants, which are fighting back. Then the plants notice Roche and suddenly he’s tied up with vines and his clothes are getting torn off and uh, he’s not supposed to find this hot, is he? But he really kinda does. And then Iorveth goes and claims him and tries to protect him from a nearly-extinct non-sentient plant that sensed a warm spot to lay its eggs until someone else could come along and fertilize them. Iorveth is delighted to be that person.
Dream: Pleasure Slave
Yeah, Roche really likes getting claimed in these. In this one, he has a favorite dream setting where Iorveth rules some grand elven kingdom and Roche’s only role is to bring him pleasure. Not to deal with politics or nobles or policy, but just to make Iorveth feel good. So far, this features cock warming, come inflation, a leather cock cage (so to speak), prostate milking, and a very nice silver chalice that Iorveth expects Roche to fill before they’re done.
Roche wears a collar
This was gonna be a simple lil thing based on me creating Roche in heroforge and giving him a lil hidden collar. But then Iorveth decided to get really sappy and had to design and create the perfect collar for his enemy. And then, much to his surprise, he gets the opportunity to PUT his collar on Roche. Which is great, except the sight distracts him so much that Roche manages to escape.
But the next time they meet, Roche is still wearing that collar, hidden under his chaperon and armor. Iorveth has feelings about that.
Standalone
Crones fic aka And Ghosts Did Shriek and Shrill
So this is the angsty fic that started from a crack premise. Er, one of them. I seem to do that a lot. But in this one, Roche goes to the Ladies of the Woods and asks for his men back. The Ladies agree, in exchange for 6 lifetimes of service. But no creature can reverse death. Which leads to the Stripes coming back to “life” as ghosts - only Roche is the only one who can see them. Ves can’t (not at first). 
Believe it or not, the whole idea behind this was the Stripes roasting Roche as he tries to flirt (terribly) with Iorveth. But uh... somehow it turned pretty dark. Like, it’ll have a happy ending for sure, but it’s gonna be a lot about processing trauma and grief and building families and also curing a plague, because that’s the first assignment from the Ladies.
Stripes fics
Cuddles with the Commander
This is intended to be a sequel to The Pride of Temeria, but I kinda got stuck figuring out exactly how Roche should react. Tbh, I don’t have much of this written yet, but the goal is for Roche to approve cuddles with everyone lmao.
Fire Breating
Okay, this one started as crack purely because I love fire, but it’s actually been really fun. So, Iorveth and Roche are established and Iorveth has been invited to a family night with the Stripes, which is kinda a lil awkward. So they decide to showcase some of their talents - which includes Roche singing musicals and PT breathing fire.
Iorveth is horrified that humans have harnessed this skill.
Iorveth’s missing eye
This is really short and idk if I’ll continue it, but the idea was for Roche to really wonder what was up with the bandana over half of Iorveth’s face was about. And then, of course, to find out.
Iorveth Gangbang
Why is this under Stripes fics, you might ask? Well, I have great news for you. Guess who the gang is?
In which Iorveth and Roche are in an established relationship and Iorveth gets tied up in the middle of the Stripes’ camp while Roche orders his men to take him apart. Iorveth very much enjoys himself, and then when the Stripes are tapped out, Roche shows ‘em how it’s done.
Kink Bingo fics aka that event that I totally failed, but hey, prompts are prompts.
Age Kink
In this fic, Iorveth and Roche both end up captured by unknown forces and end up imprisoned together. I think the Stripes and Scoia’tael are probably working together to find them and save them, but in the meantime, Iorveth and Roche decide to get to know each other a bit better. Featuring muscle spasms, blow jobs, and pain kink.
Eskel/Lambert (okay, a little out of place here, but eh, it’s in the doc and I am still working on it)
Started for a prompt on tumblr, Eskel and Lambert end up fighting and, trying to keep the peace, Eskel casts axii on Lambert. Which leads to Lambert confessing that he bit Eskel because it’s the only way he could get his mouth on him. This leads to some dodged confessions, some frottage, and some snarky banter, because of course it does. 
Tempt Not a Desperate Man aka the Fuck or Die series that started with Devour What’s Truly Yours
Fisting
The next part of the series, where Roche struggles with the fact that he’s been high key horny ever since the encounter in the woods with Iorveth and nothing is satisfying him. Iorveth, on the other hand, is jealous and annoyed that Roche keeps going to the whorehouse.
Then Roche decides to make a potentially suicidal move and enters the forest to try to find the clearing from last time. And, as you might guess from my heading, fisting will be happening. 
Iorveth POV: The Chaperon
Okay, I don’t actually have much of this written, but it’s really cute so - Roche keeps using his chaperon as a cum rag, so Iorveth knits and/or sews him a new one.
“Human Bootlicker”
PWP where Iorveth jokingly suggestions Roche should surrender on his knees - and then Roche does. And asks Iorveth to take his prize. Featuring Roche coming all over Iorveth’s boots from getting his face fucked, then leaning down and licking up the mess while Iorveth watches and then comes over his face.
One Accidental Proposal and Five Attempts At Accepting
So one of the themes of this ‘verse is gonna be the Elven Baths where the Roses of Remembrance grow. As in, they decide to make the elven baths a place they meet up. This is the first time Iorveth takes Roche there, and Roche does not know what significance the roses have. But he DOES know that Iorveth blushes cutely when he tucks a rose behind Iorveth’s ear, so...
Iorveth would like to accept, only Roche doesn’t know WHAT he’s trying to accept.
The Legend
So in the game, there is a legend around the statue of elven lovers above the elven baths. “Legend has it the lover’s sighs are enchanted within these very stones, though only those in love can hear them.” 
Iorveth overhears his Scoia’tael gossiping about the legend and comes to an abrupt realization that Roche and him were the ones they were hearing. Oops?
Standalone Fics
Letters
This is kind of a bittersweet WiP that I mostly wrote in one go and then went to sleep and kinda lost the will for it. BUT the premise is that post-Witcher 3 Roche is in charge of Temeria and his brooding is interrupted when he receives a letter sealed with a forget me not pressed into wax. Iorveth continues to send letters describing his life as a “civilian” in Nilfgaard and how much he hates it and Roche relates a little bit too much. Then Iorveth decides to run away and live on the streets as a musician and he might inspire Roche to start learning the cello and presumably at some point, they meet.
Identity Porn
Iorveth and Roche have a meet cute in Flotsam’s tavern while the elf is listening in for local gossip and Roche is passing through on his way to meet with the other northern kings to get support in fighting against the new emerging threat of the Scoia’tael. Neither knows who the other is, but that doesn’t stop them from starting a relationship where they meet every time Roche passes through Flotsam. But their house of cards can only last so long, and at some point, they will meet as enemies. Who knows what happens then? idk, not me.
Gwent pinup calendar aka Cards Out for Your Country
Hahaha, so I started this series in response to some WONDERFUL art of Roche with his Tits Out For Temeria. And obviously we need more of that, so I created a list of 24 characters who are asked to pose for some pinup art, all in the name of Gwent. So far, I’ve only finished Dandelion’s pose/the introduction, but I do plan to do as many of them as I physically can.
Gwent Game in Corvo Bianco
Wow, I didn’t even remember this WiP, so uh... clearly I haven’t worked on it in a while. But it’s Iorveth’s POV of how surprisingly comfortable he is in Corvo Bianco and Iorveth and Geralt get drunk and play gwent.
Zoltan/Jaskier/Priscilla
A giftfic for Wibbly that involves Zoltan being sappy about his bards and then Priscilla dominates them. Featuring all my headcanons about dwarven genitalia (two holes, one with a retractible dick).
Dijkstra fics
Noticing Roche’s Fucked Up Relationship
Anyone else randomly finding themselves shipping Dijkstra/Roche? No? Ah well. For this one Dijkstra observes Roche and sees a few too many reminders of himself with Vizimir, except Foltest is no Vizimir, and Roche clearly hasn’t learned to set up boundaries. Dijkstra feels weirdly compelled to help him figure that out before Foltest destroys him.
Developing Respect Fic
Also known as “let’s torture Roche 1.0!” This fic switches between the present, where Roche has woken up in a cell somewhere unknown and it brings back far too many memories for him to be entirely sure of what is happening when. In the past, he was captured by Redania while on a mission for Foltest, long before he was anyone notable. Dijkstra comes to visit, curious about this prisoner who refuses to break, to even tell them his name or confirm his country (but he has a Temerian tramp stamp, so they know lmao). So Dijkstra decides that this is not a man who will be broken through torture and decides to try conversation instead. The idea is to show them slowly gaining respect for each other, but like, obviously Roche is still a prisoner. Eventually, he’s returned to Temeria in a prisoner exchange, but meanwhile, in the present, Roche is all alone, with not even guards around and no way to free himself.
and that’s all!! I am... legitimately scared to count, tbh. This post is so fucking long, the number cannot be good for my heart. But, that said, please come talk to me about any ideas you find interesting!! Or anything you have questions about! 
And if you made it this far down the list... wow. Thank you, you rock.
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elenajohansenreads · 3 years
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Books I Read in 2021
#83 - Shadowmarch, by Tad Williams
Mount TBR: 69/100
Beat the Backlist Bingo: Cover features your favorite color prominently
Rating: 1/5 stars
Well, that was a slog.
So I have a history with this piece of intellectual property. I was introduced to Williams as an author in college (1998) because several of the friends I made my first year were big fantasy nerds--no surprise there--and I was perfectly ready to move on from my high-school-era love of less sophisticated fantasy authors. I borrowed The Dragonbone Chair from one of those friends and off I went.
So in 2001 when news about Williams writing an online serial went around, and I saw the $15 price tag...well, I was a perpetually almost-broke college student still, and sure I spent money on books, but that was a high gateway, because a) I didn't own my own computer yet, I was borrowing friends' or using the computer lab to write papers and such; and b) sure, a chunky fantasy novel might be $7 or $8 in paperback, but it was portable, easy to reread whenever, and nobody had tablets or smartphones or e-readers yet, so an online serial publication was definitely not portable. Even fifteen dollars seemed like too much for the inconvenience of a book I could only read sitting at a computer, and couldn't read all of at once.
I was genuinely angry about this shift away from the paradigm, and much like Williams vowing this serial was online only and would never be published traditionally (which I distinctly remember but don't actually have a source for) I too vowed that I would never read it.
I held out much longer than he did, if my memory of that claim is even true. But I'm wishing now that I hadn't bothered.
This is bad. Not even close to the level of quality I expect from Williams, based on the earlier Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn series, as well as War of the Flowers--which was weird but I enjoyed it--and the Otherland series, which was even weirder and not always good, but yeah, I still enjoyed that too, for the most part.
Who am I supposed to care about in this book? I'm no stranger to multiple protagonists, but there are simply too many here, meaning none of them get the development time they would need to be interesting. I'm trying to wean myself from the complaint that protagonists need to be "likable," because a character can be a jerk and still be interesting, but few of these protagonists are particularly likable either!
1. Barrick is a whiny jerk who folds under pressure and abdicates responsibility to his sister, and then makes a spectacularly bad decision for no reason other than to set up some tension at the end, and his future arc. If it's because he's "mad," bad plot reason, and if it's because he's affected by the more general shadow-madness, well, I guess he could be vulnerable to it like anyone else, but that's pretty flimsy too. 2. Briony is a fairly standard "if only I weren't a woman, people would take me seriously" princess who doesn't fold as much under pressure but is dealt a really raw deal. I'll give her credit, she does legitimately try her best to rule her lands, but she's also kind of a whiny jerk like her brother, too. 3. Quinnitan is...pointless. Sure, I see how the end of her arc in this book echoes those of the Eddon twins, but there is no direct connection between her plot and anyone else's. And I mean that literally, if there's anything that ties her story to any other single part of the book, I simply do not see it, it's buried in lore or foreshadowing that was lost on me amid the sheer weight of nearly 800 pages of plodding narrative. I read all of her scenes constantly wondering why I should care, and the fact that her arc is a very basic harem plot, "I don't want to be a token wife but really what choice do I have?" sort of thing, doesn't help, because on its own it's incredibly unoriginal. 4. Chert is marginally likable, because he's arguably got the most defined personality and most personal growth in the book, as a person of a "little" race who is distinctly not human--I get a mix of gnome and dwarf, with a faint whiff of Podling from The Dark Crystal--and who deals with an unexpected foundling by taking him into his family and trying to make it work, even when that foundling is really a big blank space in the story who still manages to get into trouble. 5. Captain Vansen gets points from me for being the guardsman deep in unrequited love, which is a trope I would absolutely eat up with a spoon. The problem is, the object of that love is a protagonist I don't care for (Briony,) leading me to question what the eff he's thinking that he can even admire her from a distance, let alone be in infatuation/love. And his plot arc is mostly "something goes wrong that's not really has fault but everyone blames him anyway." Which got dull.
Chert and Vansen are most of the reason this book gets a second star*, honestly. Chert's scenes with the Rooftoppers are generally pretty excellent, even if they're mostly tied to a plot arc that I don't care for.
The other thing that's getting me about this is that it feels like a deliberately grim-dark retread of Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn. You've got a castle that's the seat of current government but used to belong to the enemy--the enemy that no one is sure even exists anymore, that lives in a land far enough away to feel distant but also somehow close enough to be threatening, once people believe in them again. That castle is perched upon magically important ruins/caverns, and that enemy has forms of magic/communication that affect humans and can cause or appear symptomatic of madness. There's a race of small likable people who aren't quite dwarves or any other "standard" fantasy race, but are still somehow cute/appealing. There's a crippled prince who's not really well-liked. One of the primary female protagonists is a young woman who laments the limitations of her womanhood under the patriarchal feudal system of the world.
And to someone who's never read either of these series, that list of similarities could mostly read like fairly common fantasy tropes, and I forgive anyone who reads this review and thinks that. But I've read MSaT probably ten times all the way through in the twenty-plus years since I was introduced to it, and I feel like I've just been handed the same story again, with a thick coat of gray paint slathered on it and a few details changed--and those changes are basically always for the worse. No one in this story can be said to be a direct equivalent to Simon, who gets a very clear hero's journey, but if I'm supposed to slot Barrick in as a Simon/Josua mashup (that crippled prince problem) then it takes the entire book to get Barrick out of his comfort zone and on his journey, where Simon got booted from the castle at the end of the first act of the first book.
And that gets at the underlying problem that is at least partially fueling all other problems--this book is clearly just the first act of the larger story, and yes i know! that is what first books do! but this also doesn't have a lot of forward motion on its own, and it doesn't resolve anything aside from the mystery of a single murder at that happens near the beginning. Seriously, all other plot threads get kicked down the road with the "and now they're exiles" theme that the ending has assigned to most of the protagonists. Chert doesn't suffer that fate, but the ending of his story line--also the end of the book itself--is the foundling reasserting that he doesn't know who he is, which is not new information. We've literally not known who he is the whole time, except that we do find out who his mother is, but don't find out how he was taken or why he apparently hasn't aged as much as he should have or what the Qar intended by sending him back "home." The identity of his mother is basically the least important question surrounding him.
I truly feel like I just read a 750-page prologue, and that is not a good feeling.
*Yeah, I told myself this was a two-star book, but by the time I wrote the whole review, it's not and I can't pretend I still believe that. This is a one-star book. This is so bad I don't want to go on with the series, even though it almost has to get better, now that most of our protagonists are out on their journeys. And because it could hardly get worse, right? But this already took up so much of my time (I had to take a week-long break in the middle to binge some romances, as a relief from all this grimdark toil) and even though I've managed to collect secondhand copies of the rest of the series, and they've been sitting on my shelves for a few years waiting for me to invest my energy into them...I'm giving up. Not worth it.
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siedertreestudios · 3 years
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My stance as of the last 2 Dream SMP streams (as of Nov. 29th)
Yep, we’re making another one of these folks, time to over analyze pog.
So, the last two streams... New L’manburg is in a bit of trouble, huh? And many people are torn on who to side with, so I figure I’d just lay out a couple of points.
To be clear, I do not completely agree with either side. There’s a lot of grey area, so this is really a collection of thoughts on the matter
1. Tommy shouldn’t have burned and robbed George’s house, and by extension, lied about it.
•This is bad bad news for New L’manburg. Not only is this a misrepresentation of the new government, but it’s also further slandering the Founders of the country. Wether Tommy knows it or not, he is a face of L’manburg, wether he is in power or not. He has put himself in a position where he can’t go around doing stuff like that, as VP or otherwise.
•By lying about it, he further damages his countries reputation, which is most likely why Dream is calling for a larger punishment that probation.
•I don’t think that lying about Ramboo’s involvement was a good move either. I think in the long run, if Ramboo gets involved in the story at large, he will likely betray Tommy, and pull an Eret (go with whatever best suites his interests.) That’s more a read on his demeanor so far, rather than fact, so take it with a grain of salt.
•In the words of our good President Tubbo, “Tommy shut up.” Man’s digging his own grave here, he’s way to head strong and stubborn to be defending himself in a legal setting where he is obviously guilty.
2. There are no friends in politics.
•Tubbo has also but himself in a difficult position by making Tommy VP. Tubbo will very likely have to choose between L’manburg at large and Tommy, which will be difficult in the long run. Needless to say, this will be an emotional rollarcoaster.
3. I understand where Tommy is coming from, but don’t entirely condone it.
•There is one key thing about Tommy that many people tend to forget: he only wants power when he is challenged for it. Tommy displayed literally no intentions of becoming president until Wilbur told him he couldn’t do it, and when he got it, he turned it down. Tommy, more than anything else, wants to cause a little mischief, but for the most part remain peaceful. He cannot excersize that as VP though.
•Burning and robbing George’s house was revenge, plain and simple. He wasn’t happy that George remained mostly neutral and “caused” the conflict with Schlatt (which I disagree with, at the end of the day, Wilbur and Tommy are to blame, at least partially.) Doing that as a citizen? Bad, but not something that would effect the country at large. But it leads back to his position.
•He also has a right to be a little selfish. He’s given up pretty much everything for L’manburg and has been through a lot. Now he’s shouldered too much responsibility tho, so :/
4. Dream needs to take a step back.
•This is a bit more bias of me to say, so just keep that in mind, but Dream going around and doing the same things as Tommy gives him really no room to talk in my opinion. He is the face of the SMP, and the only reason he has not recived the same scrutiny as Tommy is because he’s a. Too strong for anyone to oppose him, b. The head of the SMP, and c. The big baddie who eventually needs a power check.
So, it’s all one big mess right? I know it doesn’t mean much, but here’s what I (a stranger on the internet who’s emotionally attached to all this) would do to get the best outcome in this situation:
If I were Tubbo, I would exile Tommy temporarily, or advise him to take a step back from the government and hand off his title. Obviously, Tommy is competitive by nature, meaning he would fight this. I would lay out the benefits of him not being a government figure: him being able to cause mischief without nearly as much concequences, being able to focus more on his priorities, being happier in general, etc. Tubbo, as Tommy’s closest friend, would likely be the only one to sway him to take a break from this mess. I would like Tubbo out of office, purely because he needs a break too, but taking Tommy out of the equation for a bit would take some stress off Tubbo’s shoulders.
This does leave the problem of him still being able to damage the countries reputation as one of the Founders, but that I’m willing to debate as I really don’t have a clear solution for that problem. Also, there is debate over what Tommy would do with his time away from it all, maybe working on builds or other such things. Regardless, he’ll get in to trouble, but it’s best to minimize damage at that point. Maybe reconciliation with Techno and Wilbur could be possible, as there’s still some underlying tension there.
Again, this is all just a bunch of thoughts. I’d love to hear your stances on the subject, because I didn’t write this out just to be talking to an empty void, so please :,)
Anyways, that’s my thoughts, feel free to add on!!
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comicbookuniversity · 4 years
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My Problems With X of Swords So Far....
SPOILERS!!!!!
As of this post, we are 16 of 22 chapters into this crossover event, the first of the Krakoa Era. I want to start off by saying that I have largely been enjoying this era of X-Men overall; I came for Jonathan Hickman taking over the franchise, but spent some of my quaruntine time catching up on the other titles and mostly enjoyed them. I am by no means an X-Men expert or superfan, but I know my lore pretty well and am a fan. That being said, let’s dive into this mess.
I want to give credit where credit is due, the first half of this event has been well crafted. The writers, as apparently led by Hickman and Tini Howard, have worked to create a consistent tone across all of the books and it shows. This is clearly an event crafted with care and skill. And aside from the error on Bogdanovic’s part, the art teams have been on point delivering great looking books. Considering this, the pedigree of the teams, and again, Jonathan Hickam, the guy who Marvel trusted to end Stan and Jack’s creation in Secret Wars, leading this event- this is should by all measures be much better than it is. Even if it didn’t live up to the aforementioned event, it should still be better than what we’ve got because of the ideas we’ve got on the page. I think these are all interrelated problems with the event, but I’m going to list them individually as I see them.
The Problems
1. Pacing- This largely effects the first half of the event, considering how the backhalf has changed, but we spent nearly 10 issues of the X-Men simply gathering their prophosized swords as ruled by the host of the tournament between the two sides, Saturynye. During this time, we did not get a lot of ideas of strategy or spycraft to learn more about a largely unknown enemy. We got a lot of decompressed character introspection, and even a set up to Al Ewing’s upcoming SWORD book (looking majorly forward to that book). This meant that we didn’t learn a lot about these characters that we did not already know to try to drive up the emotional tension that I don’t believe worked as the internal stakes did not match the scale of the external threats- the end of a utopia. This might have worked more if there were less of it and thus getting right to the heart of the matter. But the event spent so much space on spinning it’s wheels for.....what reason? Why was it necessary to give so much time this aspect compared to other possibilities? This brings me to my next problem.
2. The Promise of the New- One of the great things about this event is how it rewrites what we know about Apocalypse to make him more interesting while giving us a huge new set of characters and lore to get to know and love with the revelation of a whole secret history of mutants on Earth and then the history of the exiled mutants to what basically amounts to a Hell after fending it off from taking over Earth. It’s genuinely a great addition to Apocalypse and the franchise as a whole. I am supremely excited about the future of the Arrako people, but we spent 10 issues of the X-Men gathering swords while learning very little about this new land and new people. We learned about Solem a little bit and how he relates to the rest of Arrako, but that’s basically it. We are 16 issues in and we don’t know a whole lot about this lands or even more specifically the histories of Swordbreakers of Arrako. We know a little, but in all that time where the characters of X-Men and Arrako could have been interacting and building relationships to actually have drama beyond one side is coming to dominate the Earth for ancient reasons, we got next to nothing. And even as the tournament has started, the information and drama between the new side is minimal; enough to make the move the narrative forward but that’s it. I’m not saying I need a whole history course, but I definitely feel like we should know more than we do know about Arrako. I think we’ve in fact learned more about Otherworld than Arrako, which brings me to my next problem.
3. Otherworld....Why?- Seriously, why? It’s pretty clear both before and after Secret Wars that it isn’t necessary to travel through Otherworld to travel the multiverse. So...why? Because they want to build up Otherworld as a new playground for future stories and to connect othe ongoing drama of what had been happening in Excalibur, which...ok. Look I get that it helps to develop long unused properties to breath new life into them, but what does Otherworld have to do with Arrako other than apparently you have to travel through it to get to it? That seems forced to me and it does nothing to heighten the drama of the battle between Krakoa and Arrako. It forces a war to become a tournament, but other than that....again, it really doesn’t add anything. Otherworld’s role in this story is completely unnecessary. It’s easy to imagine this story without Otherworld. If Otherworld played a less forced role and a role that made more sense to the conflict, I wouldn’t have a problem with it’s inclusion or learning as much as we have about it. But, we’ve been given more information about various parts of Otherworld that have not been important and we could have spent that time learning more about or developing the relationships of Arrako/Krakoa.
4. A Tournament of the Absurd- I know I complained about it taking ten issues just to get our two sides into the same room for conflict, but then it took another three before we got to our first conflict. We were over half way through the crossover and no one had drawn their sword against their would-be enemy in favor of an overly theatrical and long dinner where we finally got some relationship building but were still not at the main draw of this attraction- the duels or whatever type of conflict it would really turn out to be. Literrally anything that involved the swords being used for combat got pushed back until like 60% through this story, which is squandering the promise of the premise. But finally, this week get got the to the action, and it was nothing like anticipated. Our first match lasts less 3 pages, which could be exciting if we understood what was going on with how the nature of the loss, but then it ‘s undercut by a plot point that makes very little sense and does not give the characters involved any real agency. An unexpected romance or marriage is always a nice surprise in a story like this, but this crossover doesn’t earn it. The characters are literally whisked away against their wills and told to marry each other without knowing a thing about each other, nor can they communicate with each other. If the marriage was a solution because of the two sides coming to an arrangement by the two sides talking it over or if it had been the two newlyweds plan based on their own insights and choices, then this idea would have been wonderful. But again, literally taken against their wills without warning and forced to marriage for the sake of two societies without it even being clear that this really advanced the cause of or guarnteed the safety of either side. Then we move forward to a fight that has promise only to be immediately stopped from fighting to participate in a childish contest between two obviously mismatched opponents that makes the contest one sided. Like, What The Actual Fuck? Why avoid the fight in favor of that contest? One clearly has more entertainment value than the other. Fuck it, fine, let’s see if Wolverine is given a fun fight. His first match (yeah, we’re getting too much Logan here) has potential, but the creative team decides to make the fight more psychedlic to the detriment of clarity of choreography and thus removes tension. It’s a style choice that pulls away from the fight and then the victory is undermined by a bullshit twist of the rules that compounds the lack of clarity into greater frustration. Then Wolverine is transported to a drinking contest against a teammate? Like, why? What does this do for the story? There’s a brief line used to justify it and the next thing it sets up, but it’s weak. It’s fucking frustrating, because developing the relationship of these two characters could have easily been handled differently rather than wasting one of the spots in the tournament for a point that is given instead of earned. I will give the third match a pass as that was actually what the story promised; intrigue and violence between the players.
At this point, unless something major changes, I’m calling it here: X of Swords is bad. It wastes is promised premise, it wastes it’s time, and it wastes it’s potential. The problem is that this is clearly crafted by people who generally know what the hell they’re doing, but for some ungodly reason their talents are not being put to their fullest. We’ve seen all of them write better stories; heck, the ongoing stories before the crossover started were better. Even if something major happens to really hook me back into this story that will only change my opinion from bad to mediocre because we’re already 75-ish% done with story, and that means all these problems will always be true. I really hope the characters of Arrako stick around after this story, because I think they have immense potential, but this is just a bad start. I know there are people out there that are happy with this story, and I’m happy for them. But, I hope I am not alone in seeing these problems. Let me know if I am not alone.
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hermionegranger56 · 4 years
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ok lads its time for my breakdown of folklore, something absolutely no one is asking for but here we are!! this album. thIs ALBUMMMM. dear GOD. the intersection of my two favorite things, taylor swift and indie folk???? i feel like i’m dreaming. when she announced the surprise drop i literally burst into tears and evidently for good reason lol.
anywho here’s the thing. Red has been my all time favorite album for 8 years now. it holds such an important place in my life and i never thought anything she did could come close (though Lover almost did). but this. THIS IS BETTER THAN RED
the lyrical genius is unmatched here. taylor isn’t just writing songs here, this is POETRY. every song is nuanced, intricate, devastatingly beautiful, with words that’ll haunt me for a long time. and the fact that it’s stories, literal folklore, no longer just about her own life is incredibly creative and is executed so well for someone who has interwoven her life into her entire body of music thus far. folklore blends facts with fiction so seamlessly and is a true exhibition of taylor’s power as a songwriter.
and the vibessss!! from haunting heartbreak songs, to ethereal lost-in-the-woods vibes, to a comforting return to her old self, this album has everything. taylor is without a doubt one of the most versatile artists of our generation, having success and skill in multiple genres and folklore only solidifies this fact.
ALL RIGHT KIDS LETS JUMP IN
the 1: hell yeah explicit tswift give it to me lol you ARE on some new shit!! ok when i first listened to this i hadn’t read her statement about the other perspectives and i was about to RIOT about her and joe breaking up (like they could ever lol). this is such a catchy beat, such a casual?? look at such a painful feeling? a really good start to this album. the part where she goes another day waking up aLONE killlllllls me wow
fave lines: “in my defense i have none/for never leaving well enough alone”
cardigan: (don’t get me started on the mv it’s gorgeous) YES THE TEENAGE LOVE TRIANGLE suchhh a good concept!! the melody of this song is unreal, the chorus makes me want to scream it’s so beautiful, the i-i-i is SOMETHING ELSE. it’s crazy how just the melody makes betty’s pain so palpable, but so enchanting at the same time. it’s bittersweet and cinematic and i’m in love. PETER LOSING WENDY GOD. easily top 5 song here
fave lines: “when you are young they assume you know nothing”, “cause i knew you/ heartbeat on the high line/ once in 20 lifetimes i” “you drew stars around my scars/but now i’m bleeding”
the last great american dynasty: watch hill!!! her watch hill house!! i live near there!! oh i think this song is so clever and i love how it ties into mad woman as well as harkens back to starlight. i LOVE the way she ties her self in, “and then it was bought by me” like ughhh her mind? and its catchy AF
fave lines: “i had a marvelous time ruining everything”
exile: YOU KNOW HOW TO DO AN INDIE ALBUM??? BRING BON IVER INTO THIS SHIT!! wowww this song is haunting and is definitely the “i’m you but stronger” version of The Last Time. the overlap of both of them singing and their parallel lines are flawless. i could play this on repeat for hours and contemplate my whole existence
fave lines: “you never gave a warning sign/i gave so many signs”
my tears ricochet: ok somehow a track 5 with tears in the title is not the saddest song here but DAMN is it good. I love the visual of someone watching over their funeral and reacting. the music is stunningggg here. ALSO i am pretty convinced this is about the whole scott/scooter drama, like the lyrics fit so well? and she said it was the first song she wrote so the timeline kinda fits?? geniusss
fave lines: “I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace”, “and if i’m dead to you/why are you at the wake?”
mirrorball: ohhhh this one is so pretty!! it just makes me want to dance around the kitchen with the person i love??? its comforting, ethereal, happyyy ugh i love it. I also think it could be about her relationship with her fans? like her music shows us different sides of ourselves idk? or just absorbing into a relationship?
fave lines: “on my tallest tiptoes/shining just for you”
seven: i’m gonna call this now: this is going to be the most underrated song on this album. it is STUNNING. POETIC. HEARTBREAKING. the music is so hauntingly nostalgic. and the lyrics, holy absolute shit. they’re a delicate testament to childhood, memory, and innocent love. it’s gut wrenching and i love it so so much
fave lines: “i’ve been meaning to tell you/i think your house is haunted/your dad is always mad/and that must be why”, “and just like folk song/our love will be passed on”, “before i learned civility/ i used to scream ferociously” ALL OF IT
august: and now we get the girl james cheated with’s perspective, which i think is great. its sunny, wistful and sad underneath all that beautiful production. when she slides from the chorus to the “back when we we’re changing for the better” and hits that “mineeee to lose” GOD, it just fills your chest. i feel like even if you never have, this makes anyone feel like they know exactly what a summer fling feels like. one of my faves
fave lines: “august slipped away/like a bottle of wine”, “cancel my plans just in case you call/ and say meet me behind the mall”
this is me trying: the slow pacing of this melody serves to show these EXQUISITE lyrics here. this is so intimate and personal and i feel like everyone can relate to this feeling of just trying to hold on and put on a brave face?
fave lines: “they told me all of my cages were mental/ so i got wasted like all my potential”
illicit affairs: ok all you need to know about this one is a) I’m obsessed b) this is the closest she has come to creating a bridge that makes me feel like the All Too Well bridge has, like scream sobbing in the car type vibe??? its unreal. and this song makes me feel that shitty feeling of: “this was supposed to be casual but oops its very much not” hmmm maybe that’s where the scream sobbing comes from hahah
fave lines: “don’t call me kid/don’t call me baby/look at this godforsaken mess that you made me/you showed me colors you know i can’t see with anyone else”
invisible string: this. THIS is probably her most stunning love song. like. i thought it was Lover. i was wrong. this one is confidently from Taylor’s perspective, about Joe and dear lord i want a love like theirs. and shit does this song put the folk in folklore, the music is so simple and gorgeous and harkens back to her country roots without losing this new sound she has. and the first few notes remind me of Mystery of Love by Sufjan Stevens so instantly im sold. this and betty are tied for my number 1, it’s just too beautiful
fave lines: “time curious time/give me no compasses/give me no signs” “isn’t it just so pretty to think/all along there was some invisible string/tying you to me”, “cold was steel of the axe that i had to grind/for the boys who broke my heart/now i buy their babies presents”, “hell was the journey/but it brought me heaven”
mad woman: FUCK YOU FOREVERRRRRR!!! yes taylor said fuckkkk ugh i LOVE this vibe, the revenge of the mad woman that the town cast out is so eerie and powerful, i’m obsessed. it ties back into the maddest woman of TLGAD and it feels like a spiritual sequel to The Man, the same feminist thread weaving through it. the lyrics are razor sharp and biting, i love it
fave lines: “and you poke that bear/till the claws come out/ and you find something/ to wrap your noose around”, “it’s obvious wanting me dead has really brought you two together”
epiphany: so uhhh THIS is the saddest song on folklore. fight me. the seamless comparison between wartime and the pandemic and waiting for some epiphany that could make sense of all the horrors surrounding the both. idk man, as someone who’s been a covid nurse since March, i just….this one HURTS. similar to Soon You’ll Get Better tbh
fave lines: “hold your hand through plastic now/doc i think she’s crashing out/and somethings you just can’t speak about”
betty: OH I LOVE IT WITH MY WHOLE HEART! this is such a TRIUMPHANT return to old taylor, it is so joyful but sad at the same time?? the harmonica?? the last part of the love triangle?? it sounds like Taylor Swift and Fearless all grown up and it makes me ache for back then, but love where we are right now. tbh the first time i heard this i sobbed through the whole thing just out of pure nostalgia. she’s back but at the same time she never left. this feels like a love song to original fans and it. is. incredible. my favoriteeee goddd
fave lines: THE WHOLE CHORUS BABYYYYY
peace: it’s gorgeous, especially the guitarrr ugh. this feels like delicate’s quiet older sister. i think it’s definitely about joe and how taylor, despite loving him, still has these insecurities and fears about what a relationship with someone in her position could be like? like there will be struggles, but he’s her family and she “would die for you in secret”. stunning
fave lines: “i’m a fire and i’ll keep your brittle heart warm”, “the devils in the detail/but you’ve got a friend in me”, “give you my wild/give you a child”
hoax: i’m surprised she ended it on a sad one (but we still have the lakes!!) but this song is hauntingly beautiful WOW. every line of this absolutely floors me. i think this one will also be largely underrated, but it is pure poetry and deserves so so much hype
fave lines: “stood on the cliffside/screaming give me a reason/your faithless love’s the only hoax i believe in”, “it still hurts underneath my scars/from when they pulled me apart/but what you did was just as dark” “my kingdom come undone/ my broken drum/ you have beaten my heart”
ANYWHO TAYLOR HAS PRODUCED HER BEST WORK TO DATE AND IM READY FOR SAD GIRL AUTUMN
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thehighestmountains · 4 years
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taylor swift's new (now old when im writing this) album, folklore, is by far my favorite album shes come out with. dare i say my favorite album of all time.. no, no, i can’t. you know those wonderful mature songs sandwiched between all the pop-py, repetitive songs: this is that album. i do understand when people say this album is quite boring, many songs sound similar, but if you are a fan of indie folk, you will be able to pick up on the subtleness.
note: the lyrics i post below with each song, im emphasizing them for the musical moment, the way the song sounds at that point, not necessarily the words themselves.
1. peace. this is a musically and lyrically beautiful song. not only is every second of this song captivating, it physically pulls me on my heartstrings when she asks would it be enough if she could never give him peace. the vulnerability and also acceptance of the consequences of her unique circumstance is palpable - she feels it, i feel it. 
The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?
I talk shit with my friends, it's like I'm wasting your honor
2. my tears ricochet. i would honestly just paste the whole song below, because again, this entire song is interesting and flows so beautifully - the way it climaxes at the end of every bridge just rings and echos. its very moody, sullen.
And I still talk to you When I'm screaming at the sky And when you can't sleep at night You hear my stolen lullabies
3. epiphany. im particularly invested in the first half of this song, it feels like sitting in the pews of a silent, empty church with your head hung low.
Crawling up the beaches now Sir, I think he's bleedin' out
Holds your hand through plastic now Doc, I think she's crashin' out
4. the lakes. im in love with the chorus, and the first verse. its romantic, cottage core (not that this entire album isn’t cottage core).
Take me to the lakes, where all the poets went to die I don't belong, and my beloved, neither do you
5. mad woman. im literally feel angrier and sadder singing along, that women are mocked of their hysteria that you caused. shes huffing under the weight of these industry men.
The master of spin has a couple side flings Good wives always know She should be mad, should be scathing like me, but
6. illicit affairs. the way this song blossoms from shy, embarrassment to i dont deserve this, anger, is truly beautiful story telling. my only thing is that it ends quite suddenly.
Don't call me "kid," don't call me "baby" Look at this idiotic fool that you made me You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else
as you might be able to tell at this point, i really enjoy the later half of the album, and thats because i listened to the first half when it first came out over and over and over again until it was a gray snot rag. then i waited a whole month or whatever to listen to the second half. thats just how i chose to do this. so im actually sick of the first half, but i do remember which were my favorites:
7. the last great american dynasty. i think the fact that taylor was able to find a similarity, a connection with this woman who had previously owned her home and write a wonderful story about it is charming and plays until the whole folklore concept.
8. seven. the contrast between the verses and the chorus is so fun, like how is this the same song?
Sweet tea in the summer Cross my heart, won’t tell no other And though I can't recall your face I still got love for you
9. invisible string. although cheesy, the writing of this song really sells it for me. i absolutely adore the way the lyrics are in this song, the format “.* was a .*”. she retells all these lovely details. its dreamy, its a great ode to love and its complicated relationship with time.
Time, curious time Gave me no compasses, gave me no signs
Time, mystical time Cutting me open, then healing me fine
Time, wondrous time Gave me the blues and then purple-pink skies
10. the 1. this is really a wonderful break up song, when youre at stage 5 of acceptance “and it's alright now”.
I thought I saw you at the bus stop, I didn't though
Persist and resist the temptation to ask you If one thing had been different Would everything be different today?
11. cardigan. i actually bothers me that this is clearly a lana del ray song, but its none the less a good song, and when she sings “i knew you” before the start of every uniquely different chorus, i can feel her heartbreak.
I knew you Tried to change the ending Peter losing Wendy, I
12. exile. the culmination of their two voices and ballooning at the end is stunning artistically.
13. august. the first half is slightly predictable, it rises and falls exactly where you think, but the way the second half of the song does a 180, and i quite enjoy it.
Do you remember? Remember when I pulled up And said "Get in the car" And then canceled my plans Just in case you'd call Back when I was living for the hope of it all For the hope of it all "Meet me behind the mall"
14. betty. i do think this is a great complement and light hearted balance to the more serious side of the album. its kind of a fun vibe when youre in your car, singing along “will you love me, will you hold me”, but if i want teen romance songs, i prefer august over betty. 
Standing in your cardigan Kissing in my car again Stopped at a streetlight, you know I miss you
15. hoax. i dont quite understand what the song is about, where is she coming from? who did this to her? im genuinely confused, but with nearly every song at the bottom of this list, theres still moments i enjoy.
Stood on the cliffside Screaming, "Give me a reason" Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in
16. this is me trying. this doesnt do anything for me. she sings that she is trying, but is she really? im not at all convinced in fact. also this lyric is disgusting: “I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere”. ??? i still like the bridge, an escape from the rest of the song:
It's hard to be anywhere these days When all I want is you You're a flashback in a film reel On the one screen in my town
17. mirrorball. this is skippable. “You'll find me on my tallest tiptoes Spinning in my highest heels, love” is sickly sweet, this is no real backbone to this song. again, the bridge is an escape from the cotton candy swirl of a song:
And they called off the circus Burned the disco down When they sent home the horses And the rodeo clowns
jesus christ, did i do it, did i do all the songs, that was so many songs. we ended on a sour note, but i still think this album is a 10/10.
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