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#do not care about the ramifications
apollos2 · 4 months
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pure and radiant, he wields love to shrive clean the hearts of men
there is nothing more terrifying
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halfyearsqueen · 7 days
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thinking about her and her siblings
#specifically the way she doesn’t use the word treason to describe their actions even though the likelihood of them in reality being#at the least complicit in her usurpation is not a small possibility#and like not deeming their actions treason is a way that she can save them from facing the full ramifications of it without seeming weak#she kinda shifts responsibility and culpability away from them and seems to be conscious in the fact they were ? not given much of a choice#in taking part in the rivalry between her and their mother#and like her calling her half brothers half brothers to me personally is ? not a way of disavowing the blood they share and more of a way of#bringing her mother back to the forefront and the fact she IS a product of viserys’ first marriage#she’s relying very heavily on the widow’s law for legal precedence to combat mentions of the great council#and the fact her claim can’t be considered in the same sense that it might be if she was alicent’s first child#and like - she can only really do that because she was invested as princess of dragonstone#so her claim was official. it mattered in the sense of viserys made it matter#and thus couldn’t be passed over the way it would’ve been#and like with helaena she doesn’t really need to have that distinction in place because HER claim wasn’t being discussed at all#and like I do think she was serious on giving them places of honor at her court after she’d ascended#she’d just never got to that part#like it’s ? complicated#it’s ? she cares about them . she doesn’t know them
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ok so given everything went well the the Bride’s Reanimation what exactly did Dan decide to do? Because while he did agree to her creation with the agreement that she would be his replacement Meg, she’s not she has a different brain and based on what we saw a different personality what will Dan’s reaction be if she’s not what he originally wanted? Will he get discontent and look for happiness elsewhere like he did with Herbert? Will he resent her for not being Meg? Even if she was similar enough for him there’s no guarantee that she would love him back, which is extremely understandable since he is essentially her parent. What if the Bride just isn’t into Dan at all and just wants a dad? Will he leave? Will he blame her? Will he blame Herbert? Will he just lose it and try to inflict harm (he’s not emotionally stable especially not when it comes to romance) I’m kinda curious to know what will happen
#Overall the sci-fi move genre(?) of male doctors/scientists creating women in order to cure the guilt they feel for playing a role#In a lover’s death is its whole own thing and can say a lot about bodily autonomy and gender roles being projected onto the creation#Because at the end of the day these creatures are being created with the very specific goal of fulfilling a specific role#That the doctor thinks he needs in his life/overall being there to be a particular thing to the doctor#And never once does he actually stop the think about the ramifications of his actions and the effects it can have on him and his creation#Like what if it doesn’t make the creature happy? What if they can’t do it right and make him resentful? The never think#Actually this isn’t even just about creating women(or what is supposed to be a woman)#All doctors in media we see creating artificial life do it with the very express purpose that the creature will fulfill a perfect role#The perfect wife or or son or lover#Whatever this role is they all have specific thoughts on how the creature should act and want to enforce that onto them#Also let’s not even get into the problem of creating a creature specifically to be your lover because the consent there is dubious at best#Because do they have the minds of children at first? Even if not they owe you a great deal for creating them is that leveraged#Overall the whole “making a person without conception” is such an intriguing story device I could probably write an essay on this shit#Anyway rant over if you made it this far thanks for caring#reanimator#herbert west#bride of reanimator#dan cain
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becthefool · 5 months
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maybe this isn't my post to make but I hate the trend of people saying stuff like "congratulations drugs on winning the war on drugs" for shit like marijuana being legalized or companies not being as strict with their drug testing and it's like. The war on drugs was very clearly not a war on drugs, it was and is a way to justify massive police budgets, police brutality, and incarceration, to harm and kill drug users, and the specific rhetoric of the war on drugs directly exists to target POC. White people being allowed to order weed edibles via doordash in progressive parts of the world isn't like, some win over those systems. Thousands are still incarcerated for drug charges. Living in a city where the toxic and unregulated drug supply is killing thousands, including my friends, and not knowing whether or not I'm gonna see those still alive again because of the criminalization and violence of the drug war, knowing people who have the threat of jail time and violence over their heads because they're trying to keep each other safe and test and distribute safe drugs, and then seeing "haha lol we won the war on drugs" puts such a bad taste in my mouth
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questor-thews · 1 year
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okay so I’m gonna hold off on talking about the mario movie because I assume most people haven’t seen it yet BUT. I will say there is one very specific thing that I cannot wait to see other people’s reactions to. not gonna say what tho
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yeahlikethebird · 7 days
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.
#it's 1am and i'm depressed and don't want to go to bed#there's such an unbelievable amount of century-defining tragedy and horror in the world rn#and i know that’s always true but jfc we know about so much more of it simultaneously now#like i'm supposed to be chill and functional in the face of war pandemic climate change forever chemicals micro plastics and fascism?#and and and?#i'm supposed to smile and ask follow-up questions when people tell me about vacations to Hawaii#rather than shaking them and saying holy fuck stop doing that please learn about the ramifications and historical context of your actions#i'm supposed to smile and give a measured response when a new coworker asks my other coworker and me#when they can/SHOULD use generative AI *for work purposes*#rather than screaming and throwing articles at them about the environmental impact of LLM bullshit#and that's all large scale#that's not getting into the fact that there's a growing family chilliness over refusal to communicate about I/P shit#or the fact that my mom is dying slowly and hates it and is worsening her relationship with my siblings little by little#or the fact that I'm peeling away at my sanity trying to process a divorce and get healthcare for my cat and dental care for myself#or the fact that it takes hours of research to find DISH SOAP THAT DOESN’T KILL THE MICROBIOMES OF THE LOCAL WATER SUPPLY#(10/10 recommend 'blueland' for that if you're reading btw)#like i'm painfully aware of the back-patting level of efficacy that i have for buying different soap and going to the farmer's market#but there's only so much i can do so i have to try to do what i can right? but it's so little and everything is so much#and my mental health is a mess; the fact that my particular neurotype is known to get more volatile with age scares the shit oit of me#like it's this bad at 33 and it gets WORSE?#my job is great for personal privilege but so *so* meaningless and redundant#and how tf do i look at all of this and not feel fucking hopeless?#i can distract myself with my garden but the candide approach was myopic even in the 17th century so it's hard to justify now#I'm so tired#just... fuck man#tag rant#i should delete this but I'll forget if you read this far i hope it wasnt damaging to your mental health#i just had to let off the brain scream pressure somewhere
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shadow4-1 · 1 month
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I'm just imagining the 141 looking for a medic because all of the ones they sign on keep dying or getting poached by other task forces. And you're a baby medic who is shadowing your higher rank and well esteemed teacher (who is actually the one on the 141's radar). But something goes horribly wrong...
You've done everything you possibly can but he's still drowning in his own blood.
He's tried walking you through everything through wheezing, wet breaths. He has a knowing look in his eye, this isn't working and it won't work. You're in the EVAC helicopter, but the time it'll take to get you back to base is too long.
"I-I'm sorry." You whimper, tears forming on your lashes. "I'm not a very good student."
Your mentor smiles sadly, his eyes glassy. He was always sweet to you when he was no nonsense with everyone else.
"You're doing great, kid." He huffs, blood leaking out the corner of his mouth. He winces and sputters up more but you're there. You try to fill up his vision and give him something to focus on. "People crash. Don't give up on 'em till it's over."
You cradle his head, memorize every wrinkle, scar, and patch on his kit. And then, it hits you.
He's right, its not over yet.
You rip through your medical supplies with shaking hands. It feels like it takes forever but it's merely seconds before you're sticking a needle from your vein into his. You watch the bag as it quickly fills with your blood before entering into him.
Your mentor chuckles and shakes his head weakly. This is nowhere near anything he taught you. But he knows it might just save his life since you're both the same blood type.
You go through multiple more needles releasing pressure on his lungs until he's even more stable than before. He finally has a shot and that's all that matters.
You're so close. Fifteen minutes out when he starts to crash again. You've exhausted everything. Your medical supplies are dwindling. You have no more blood to give. Your teacher just continues to smile at you. And he keeps smiling at you and he keeps smiling at you. You rub at his face, his eyes are far away. You feel for his pulse.
You scream.
It's not one of fear, but a deep, mournful cry. You turned your comms off forever ago but you know everyone could hear you, even through the wind. It carries your scream off and away as the heli's motors clip around you. You feel empty. He was supposed to teach you more. He was supposed to live.
You scream again and throw yourself over him. You sob and scream and grab at him, trying desperately to look for vitals. You know you won't find one but you're delirious. He's supposed to live! You did everything right!
Tears blur your vision but you notice someone out of the corner of your eye. It's one of the members of a different task force assigned to help your squad with this now terribly failed mission. He's their Captain, you think. He tries to reach down but you hiss at him. You don't care about rank. You don't care about the social ramifications. You scream to be heard over the wind.
"DON'T TOUCH HIM!"
The man's eyes soften. You don't imagine what you look like. You probably look wild, feral, gnashing your teeth and growling. You don't care. He's YOUR teacher, he's YOUR responsibility. Quite frankly, you don't trust any of the other strangers watching you. You hiss at them too. Then you cry again.
You bury your face into your now dead mentor's chest and sob.
- - - - -
The look in your eye is like nothing he's ever seen before in a medic.
Price had watched you exhaust every possible avenue to save your superior's life. When all else failed you gave him your own blood. And when he finally succumbed to his injuries you threw yourself over him, not allowing anyone or anything to get close.
Even when they arrived on base, when your other superiors tired to swoop in, you stood your ground.
"I don't care! Even in death he's MY patient!" You yelled at your own Captain.
And surpisingly, they let you take care of him to the end. They even let you escort his body to the morgue. It's where Price finds you hours later.
You sit in a rusty old folding chair just outside the morgue doors. Your eyes are glazed over, far away, and still brimming with tears. He kneels in front of you to get on your level. He doesn't say anything, just waits for you to finally see him. You blink slowly and look up at him.
"I-I'm sorry..." You apologize. "I d-didn't mean t-"
"It's alright, Love." He hums and offers you a tight smile. "I understand."
He pats your knee in a fatherly way before standing up. His knees pop and he winces. You immediately stand up, your eyes searching him up and down.
"S' alright, I promise. Just a lil' stiff s' all." He soothes. "I need you to come with me."
He notices how your pretty lil' eyes widen. He shakes his head and offers a hand to help you out of the chair.
"You're not n' any trouble, sweetheart. I just want to talk with you."
He looks down at you with a knowing, sweet smile.
Your commitment is exactly what he's looking for.
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woodland-gremlin · 19 days
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Summoning Your Secret Boyfriend Pt. 3
This post is dedicated @fanfics-or-dragons who wrote part of the post. I will put their part in bold. I would suggest checking them out, they write some really interesting stuff.
First Previous AU Summary
“Because it is!” Constantine screams, “They literally say ‘hi’ by fighting each other. Not to mention even if they don’t try to purposely hurt you they often do due to how fragile we are compared to them. Even their weakest would be a challenge to our heavy hitters!”
Constatine tried to take a deep breath to calm down. The kids were obviously alive so they obviously haven't pissed anything off too badly over there. If anything they might have gained favor with something from there. "Kids you may have not bungled whatever the hell you got up to but I seriously doubt you understand the ramifications that can happen when you form ANY type of relationship with beings so powerful you can't comprehend it."
Constatine was actually feeling like the sheer dred was fading and that he could handle this, and then Superman had to butt in to defend his kid. "The kids obviously have not been keeping us informed of their actions as much as they should have, and that will be being addressed Supernova. But they obviously have not gotten themselves into too much trouble with how you describe the beings from this realm. And you are one to talk about dangerous relationships with more powerful beings. The team has hardly had the type of relationships you tend to favor."
Which would have been annoying enough if it wasn't followed by the robin kid bursting out laughing and falling to the ground. Looking directly at Supernova, who was suddenly looking at the ground and bursting out into more laughter. He doesn’t get paid enough to deal with this let alone teenagers.
While Constantine was reenacting the scene from the office, Supernova and Red Robin worked on controlling their laughter.
“It was from when Batman was stuck in the time stream,” Red Robin stated through his muffled laughs.
All eyes turned to focus on Red Robin the moment those words came out of his mouth. The mood turned from slightly light hearted to sullen in a moment. Most members looked like they were sucking on a lemon, remembering how they called him crazy for thinking that Batman was alive. The look in their eyes as they agreed that he lost his mind in grief was always in the back of his mind. Reminding him to be careful with who he trusted and how small that number now was. It was why he liked rubbing it in their faces that he was right, no matter how childish the action was.
“The time stream,” Red Robin continued getting up from the floor, “is a part of the realms. Batman being there was causing them a bunch of problems so they were pretty happy to hand him over after we fixed the problems his presence caused.”
“Yeah,” Supernova chimed in, “and one of their citizens that was fixing the disturbances in the time stream talked about the rules and how Batman was breaking them while they helped us hold up our part of the deal.”
Which was partly true. It was mostly Danny complaining about how much trouble the Justice League causes him and with mentions of laws he needs to study up for his coronation. Apparently every new King throws out the previous ruler’s laws and makes new ones. He decided he would instead use old laws as a framework and make them fairer. They spent a lot of time with him working on them so they have the best understanding of the laws now that their boyfriend is King.
Even without mentioning that Constantine turned from his calmer state into looking half-dead again.
“So let me get this straight,” the con man said while he rubbed the bridge of his nose, “For fixing the disturbances in the time stream that Batman caused, they returned him?”
“Yeah.” “Basically.”
“And you never thought to mention that to anyone?!”
To be continued . . .
Next
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shayyprasad · 3 months
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intellectual | peter parker
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summary: you overhear something you weren't supposed to, but it shouldn't have been said in the first place. in result, you can't help but wonder if peter wants something different.
warnings: implied smut, mentions of sex, insecurity, use of y/n
pairing: bimbo!reader x frat!peter
word count: 3.0k+ words (my longest fic yet-)
a/n: in no way is use of "bimbo" meant to be a patriarchal stereotype. please do not take it offensively, this is a work of fiction.
M.LIST | RULES/REQUESTING | ABOUT ME
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peter was totally smitten by you. really, he was. after all he's been through, it was kind of nice having someone who adores him as much as he does, even if you are... a tad bit dim-witted.
while he grew up surrounded by death, trauma, and more, you were raised sheltered, hidden away from all the bad things. and even though peter's been through some shit, he finds it to hold you so gently, like the pretty thing you are, as if you were stained glass; fragile, but so beautiful.
when he's holding you, all his soft, brown eyes can focus on are how your soft, manicured hands wrap around his rough, calloused ones. you're always careful not to hurt him with your acrylics.
even though you can be slow at times, it's almost impossible not to admire the way your clothes always hug your curves, glossed lips pulled into a pretty pout.
peter could have just about any girl he wanted on campus, but he didn't want any of them.
he wanted you, and only you.
maybe it's because you were different, and no, not in dim-witted nature. but because of how soft you were. you didn't know, and even if you did, understand the horrors he wittnessed out there everyday.
you were protected by a little (very pink) bubble that you lived in, so when he came home to you, it felt as if he was in a different world altogether. you were so damn good at distracting peter, and you didn't even know it.
you were in your own dorm room, watching a silly rom-com while peter was with his friends, he told you not to wait up for him, given that he would be up 'til the early hours of the morning. but you decided that peter and his goodnight kisses were slightly more important than your beauty sleep.
slightly.
you furrowed your neatly shaped eyebrows at something that one of the characters said, tilting your head.
ram-i-fic-a-tion? you thought, humming. pulling out your phone, you googled the word.
noun plural noun: ramifications
a consequence of an action or event, especially when complex or unwelcome. "any change is bound to have legal ramifications"
"legal ram-i-fic-a-tions?" you wondered aloud.
you skimmed the rest of the definitions, still confused. surely peter wouldn't mind if you gave him a quick ring? so you went ahead in did that, letting the sound echo in the room.
when he didn't pick up, you frowned.
"ummm..." you trailed off, calling one of his friends, spencer, instead. you weren't a stranger to him, but more of a mutual. after all, your roommate was dating him. actually, you'd ask alyssa, your roomie, but she wasn't here.
much to your happiness, spencer did pick up. "hiii, spence."
"y/n?" he said, slurring slightly.
"what does, like, ram-i-fic-a-tion mean?" you asked, careful to enunciate.
spencer was aware of... how your brain worked, and he wasn't a jerk about it (unlike some people). he was one of peter's closer friends, so you felt comfortable around him.
"ramification? oh, uh, it's like a consequence."
you frowned dumbly, "to what?"
"to an action. if you don't study for the final, you might not do well. that's a consequence to your action. a ramification."
"oh. oh! okay. thank you!"
he didn't disconnect right away, and you could hear one of his frat brothers, you were unsure who, talking. and of course, you strained your ears to listen.
"it doesn't get annoying or anything?"
you heard peter's voice come next, and instantly perked up. "what?"
"dude, be so for real. she's hot, but like, as dumb as a third grader. do you have to talk to her like that too?" he laughed.
oof, you thought, sucks to be whoever it was they were talking about.
"sometimes. she's good in bed, though."
wait. he was talking about you. your jaw dropped. i mean, you were stupid, but not this stupid. so this is what "saturday night with the boys" was all about?
you heard collective laughing. you did stupid things sometimes, but never had the mental compacity to be embarrased by them. this, though? this was different.
you trusted peter.
he was the only person who never, ever, spoke to or about you like that. in fact, it was one of the reasons you'd grown to like him so much. because he was patient, he was kind, and never did he once judge you.
well, that's what you thought.
but you were dumb enough to think that just because he never spoke about it to you, he never spoke about it all.
you immediately disconnected the call, dropping your phone. trying to focus back on the movie, you nibbled on a piece of popcorn.
but you just couldn't get over it. did it bother him?
all the questions? the dim-witted stupidity? all the pink?
reluctantly, you glanced the hot pink bowl that held your snack.
you didn't mean to be so... like that. you were just being yourself. did peter not like you being yourself? no, no, of course not. if he didn't, then why would he be with you?
a little voice in the back of your head rang out; "because you're good in bed."
maybe it wouldn't hurt to try and raise your iq?
you turned off the tv, hot pink popcorn bowl forgotten. alyssa wouldn't mind if you borrowed something, right?
you opened her room door, walking over to her bookself. wrinkling up your nose, you scanned her shelf. how could someone like reading so much?
it was so... gross.
oh, well. maybe peter was into intellectuals. and you had better become before he left you for someone like that.
your eyes paused at a book titled "the hobbit".
"what's a... hobbit?" you asked, not to anyone in particular. you skipped it, looking at her other ones.
"'twisted love', 'the fault in our stars'... what'd the stars do?" picking up the book, you read the back. "huh," you remarked, putting it back.
instead, you grabbed a couple self-help books, struggling to hold them with your acrylic nails, which, of course, were bright pink... accentuated with big charms; bows and hearts.
you went back over to your room, dumping them on your bed. checking your nails again, you drummed them against your palm to make sure they were intact.
you started reading the first one, curling up in a blanket, but you kept getting distracted. every five seconds, you look up to make sure your lashes were still in place, or that your skin wasn't to shiny, or that your hair was still perfect. and to be honest, you didn't really understand any of it.
like, who actually had the patience to read through all of it? how could a book cure all your crap?
and why would you read a book to feel better, when you could go to a spa, or a shopping spree.
credit cards were invented for a reason.
but you powered through, at the very least, you skimmed the words. there was no way you could read it word for word. but you wanted to try... for peter.
you wanted him to stick around, to love you, but not superficially. not for sex.
you stayed up until 1:30 (mostly reading, and you still didn't understand how people did this for fun), but didn't call peter. you'd talk to him tomorrow, maybe. first, you needed to get your facts straight. eventually, you got ready for bed.
this included showering, taking off your makeup, putting your hair in rollers, and your fifteen-step skincare routine.
you may have been half asleep, but you'd never skip a step.
peter came over around noon monday, when neither of you had classes. "jeez, babe," he groaned, you in his lap, "i've got so much to do. seriously, i'm never gonna get it done."
you twirled your hair, appearing nonchalant, "your mindset is either your best friend, or worst enemy."
you kept your eyes trained on your phone, waiting for peter to respond. looking up, you saw him blink. "uh... yeah. that was- that was very... un-y/n-like."
to be honest, you didn't even know what the saying meant. you just memorized it from your book. "was it dumb?"
"no, it was smart," peter replied, kissing your hairline.
"i'm normally dumb?" you asked, tearing up. lips pouted, voice moist, you made eye contact with him. you knew you were a little slow, but dumb? really?
"no! that's not what i meant. it just sounded- well, i- cause you never say stuff like that. you're my smart, pretty girl."
"oh, okay," you said, your nails tracing the curve of his back. you pecked him on the lips, but he brought you back for a longer kiss.
you giggled as he flipped your positions, peter on top.
"can i show you just how pretty you are?"
he didn't have to ask twice.
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you were in the dining hall, sitting with some of your friends, mixed with some of peter's.
they were talking as you picked at your salad, leaning into peter.
"ugh," sarah, you kind-of friend started, "my boss gave me a premotion."
"what the fuck are you complaining about?" alyssa scoffed.
"because! it means that i have to do more...! like, i'll have to get up earlier. i dunno if i'll take it. it's cooler than the one i have now, but but it's not as comforting."
you spoke up, completely confident, "commit to change. either embrace the challenge of pursuing your destiny or shy way and live in regret."
collective "oohs" and "damns" were heard around the table, and you reveled in it.
"okay, girl, you go."
"parker, when did your girlfriend get a braincell upgrade?" you looked at peter, waiting for him to shoot something back, but he didn't. you frowned slightly, going back to the salad.
it went on like that, you would pipe in and offer self-help advice (not really knowing what it meant) hoping for peter's attention. sometimes you got it, and sometimes you didn't.
it was fine, you wanted him to notice you. after all, you weren't reading for fun. you were doing it for him, so... just, like, notice already.
you'd been focusing so much on the self-help books, your nails had grown out, leaving space between your nail bed and acrylics. deciding to take some time away from the books and all their un-understandable wisdom, you wanted to paint your nails.
nothing to big, but more simple. you were finding it hard to turn the page with the large charms on the acrylics you normally had to.
you found some 100% acetone in your bathroom, so you soaked your nails, waiting for the acrylics to come off. once they got loose enough, they came off easily.
you did some prepping, then picked out two different shades of pink. you were about to start when you heard two long knocks, then two short ones.
(it was peter's special knock, so you'd always know when it was him.)
"come in!" you called out, and you saw a head of fluffy brown hair peek in.
"hey," he said, slipping in your room.
"hi, petey!"
he came up from behind you, hugging your waist. "whatcha doing?"
you opened a bottle of nail paint, "painting my nails."
"cute colors," he kissed your cheek, and you leaned in.
"right? pink is so pretty," you gushed.
"what are these?" peter asked, and you looked over curious as to what he was talking about.
"oh, just, like, lyss' books."
"yeah, but why're they in here?" he read the back of one, raising a brow.
you continued painting your nails, trying to appear chill. "i was reading them."
he seemed to do a double-take, and you frowned, "what?"
"nothing- nothing, i just..."
"i know how to read," you said, shoulders sagging. "i'm smarter than a third-grader," you didn't catch the slip-up, but he did.
that caught him off guard there, "what?"
"what?" looking up, you finally met his eyes.
"you said you- well, yeah, i know. you just don't-" he paused, "self-help books didn't seem like your thing is all. oh, is that why've you been saying all that?"
"saying what?"
"all the-" he didn't want to hurt your feelings, but if he was right, he already had. "the, um, advice?" he stammered. peter didn't trip over his words often, and you knew that.
you were sure that he knew that you knew, but you weren't sure if he knew for sure.
you shrugged, "doesn't it sound smart?"
"no, yeah, it does." he's treading very carefully. it was quiet for a brief moment; "did you hear?"
"hear what?"
"the... the comment i made?"
"oh, that one about me being stupid, but good in bed?" you said it so casually, as if it didn't bother you at all.
but it did. he knew it did.
he sighed, "i'm really sorry, baby."
"for what?"
"for saying that."
"no, you're sorry you got caught. you wouldn't have said it if you didn't mean it."
"i didn't- i was drunk," peter tried again.
"drunk words are sober thoughts," something else you read, you aren't sure where.
he was starting to get really nervous. he didn't know what was going through your head, normally he had a good idea, but it wasn't anything like this. it didn't seem like you hated him, but he wasn't about to take advantage.
"no, i-"
"it's okay. i'm working on it," you said, trying to make him feel better. as if you were the one who'd messed up, not peter. the idea itself was insane to him, and it only made him feel worse.
"angel," peter started, "this is not your fault. please don't make it your fault. i'm the one who messed up, and what i said was not okay. it was a stupid, drunk joke, and i shouldn't said it."
you blew on your nails, blinking back your tears. mascara, the good stuff, was expensive. you looked up, shocked to see tears in his eyes. you don't think you've ever seen him cry before. well, maybe once, when you watched "titanic" with him.
peter wasn't one to get emotional, he still denied ever crying over that movie.
"it's okay," you repeated again. you were dumb, you knew that. it really wasn't his fault, you shouldn't have pushed him to feel like that.
"but it's not. and i know you know that, please tell me what i can do to make it better."
"but-"
"no, it's not," he said sternly, "and i cannot stress that enough. i'm really sorry, baby."
you capped the polish, you didn't know what to say. it wasn't your fault? okay, fine.
maybe he was right.
"i got really upset," you admitted.
"i know, baby," the tears are falling, he quickly wipes them away.
"did you really mean it?"
"no, no, no, of course not. i absolutely love you the way you are, and you shouldn't have to change yourself for anyone- especially not for me."
"so you don't think i'm only good for sex?"
"baby, no, baby, no!" baby, he used that word for affection; when he was guilty, trying to prove something to you... in this case, how sorry he was. "you are good for so many other things," he paused, "okay, that didn't sound great."
he took a deep breath, taking your freshly painted hands in yours, "don't mess up the polish," you warned, even though you were tearing up.
peter smiled slightly, that meant you weren't too upset, right? that he hadn't fucked everything up by great means?
"i haven't ever met someone like you, who loves me the same back. and i don't mean generally, but romantically. lots of people can't put up with me," he started, "but you do, and jesus, baby, i'm so greatful for that- and you," peter added.
"you are the bright pink light of my life. you're so different from other girls i've been with, you see me. you don't look at me, you see me. like, okay, maybe you aren't the greatest at math, but you don't have to be a s.t.e.m. genius to be smart."
peter was getting raw, he was getting vunerable. "i don't know how to use a curling iron for the life of me, i don't know the difference between mascara and eyeliner. well, i do, but i didn't before you."
you looked at him, opening your mouth to speak. you wanted to tell him he'd lost you somewhere along the line, but figured it was important for him to get this out.
"you've got a different mindset than me, and i love that. you're the biggest feminist i've ever met, and wait until you meet may. i think it's interesting that your entire personality doesn't revolve around your degrees and resumes, because, god, people like that are annoying. most of all, you're confidence is amazing. i never had anything like that in high school."
you knew that he was a nerd, kept his head down, shoulders sagging. "i just... i'm sorry. i don't know why i said it. i'm a huge insecure jerk that thinks he can get away with crap by projecting it onto his lovely, amazing, wonderful girlfriend. you're my favorite person, and i can't help but think you'll leave me one day. i thought that if i acted like i didn't care... i don't know. i- i don't... i'm sorry."
you took moment, that's the longest he's ever spoken to you, but he wasn't done, apparently.
"also, i don't care about sex. i mean, it's nice and whatever, but what's the point of it if i don't have you. what i'm trying to say is, i'd pick you over that any day, okay? it doesn't matter to me. i'm not with you for that."
"thank you," you said, it seemed appropriate. basically, he just compliented you a whole lot, and it worked; you seem to have a thing for praising. "and i forgive you. also, i hated those stupid books, and if they weren't, like, alyssa's, i'd burn them."
you shuddered, "i can't believe i read them."
"really?" peter asked, hopeful. you kissed away a stray tear, looking into his wet eyes. "we're okay?"
"we're so okay," you paused, "but you have to watch bridgerton with me."
he groaned, "fine." (you knew he liked it, he just wouldn't ever admit to it.)
"wait, so just checking, you aren't into, like, intellectuals or whatever?"
"i'm into you," he said, "whether or not you idenify as one."
taglist: @whatsupstark @ell0ra-br3kk3r @idli-dosa @susvale @kdbsr-h @littlemsbumblebee @sflame15-blog @twinsunkithies @chocolateshepherddreamclod
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nat20composure · 5 months
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Astarion and Agency- The Necessity of Discomfort to Self Discovery and the Infantilization of Victims
Minor Astarion discourse ahead that mentions the treatment of SA victims post-abuse:
I want to open this post up just with like. The statement that I don't think there is a correct way to enjoy media and that I LOVE to see individual head cannons and takes on characters in media. I think that is also, to a degree, an integral part of video games because of how unique the experience of playing a game will be to every person who plays it. But it has been making me feel so incredibly sad looking through fan content, art, or discourse for BG3 specifically because of how many people have taken the route of infantilizing Astarion.
I understand the instinct to shield or protect an individual that you love and care for. I also understand that because of the nature of the things that Astarion goes through, a lot of people also feel very deep emotional stakes in him. I'm one of the many fans of the character who is a victim of SA and CSA, I really do get it. That is also why for me personally it is so demoralizing to watch so many people treat him like he is a child who cannot make his own decisions or stand up for himself. Part of that frustration stems from it feeling like a media literacy issue, and the other part of that sense of defeat is just because it feels indicative of a broader attitude that people seem to hold towards victims of abuse, particularly those who are victims of SA.
To explain what I mean by people infantilizing him: I see so many people refuse to allow him the opportunity to be hurt, or to feel uncomfortable. They see this character who has been through an immensely horrible and traumatic experience, and their instinct is to try and shield him from anything else that has the potential to upset him. I get that the people who want that aren't doing it with malicious intent, but frankly it is not really...Helpful? To try and prevent victims from Experiencing Discomfort tm. I also think it kind of disregards the entire thesis of Astarion's character and arc.
When you go through something that robs you of your selfhood and agency, the world can become a crushingly terrifying place. In Astarion, that fear presents itself in a desperation for power, control, and at the core of both of these desires- Safety. One thing the game is clear about is that he has a right to kill his abuser. He has a right to escape his situation. A lot of Astarion's personal arc is centered around being able to finally do that. But the game doesn't just leave it off at getting him to safety. So much of it is also about him needing to take responsibility for himself and his actions, with needing to learn who he as a person is.
The inclusion of the Gur children and Sebastian as characters is a good example of ways in which the game gives Astarion the opportunity to take responsibility. I think that if the intention of the arc was meant to be that "Astarion should never ever have to deal with being afraid or uncomfortable again", then the Ascended arc wouldn't Come with such heavy moral ramifications, like sacrificing the other people just like him, killing the victims he lured in, literal child murder. The game infers that he doesn't deserve to die because of the things he Needed to do to survive, but it also makes it very clear that there is a difference between addressing an Active Threat and using your fear as an excuse to hurt others. Breaking that cycle of abuse when he finally gets the chance to is what separates Spawn Astarion from Cazador.
Taking responsibility for himself, and letting himself sit in the discomfort of vulnerability ultimately ends up being a thing that he is very proud of and cherishes. If you tell him you will make sure nothing like that ever again he himself says that he doesn't want you to be his protector. And so it blows my mind when people go into all of these discussions about Astarion with this...Weird moral high ground for never, ever making or letting him make choices that might hurt him?
I see this the most when it comes to discussions about the possible polyamorous relationship with Halsin and the interaction with the drow twins in the brothel. So many people are just...outright angry? At other people engaging with either of those options? And I feel like that anger is one) rooted in the projection of their Own feelings on non-monogamy and what a victim of SA can or cannot look like. and two) Relies on undermining the agency that Astarion BEGS you for at every turn.
When it comes to the drow twins, the game adapts Astarion's response to them based on where he is in his own personal development (a really cool thing imo). Obviously, if he still doesn't feel good or safe about engaging with sex he declines and says you can feel free, though he hopes you aren't just doing it because he hasn't had sex with you. I think this makes sense: He's just gotten out of a situation where his Safety and worth were directly tied to him having sex. I imagine he feels afraid that not wanting to have sex with you makes him replaceable or inadequate because at this point in the game, he feels like that's all he has to offer. The interaction is relatively the same if you ask him for a poly amorous relationship with Halsin: He just asks you to reassure him that you aren't only doing it because he hasn't had sex with you, and then tells you he isn't worried about it otherwise.
A lot of people have taken the expression of that insecurity in combination with him still allowing you to go forward and do these things as him just "sucking it up" because he's afraid of losing you. (I am aware Shadowheart says he wouldn't be able to handle it when you ask her if you can date both of them- But keep in mind, Astarion says she wouldn't be able to either, and THAT obviously isn't true of her. For the purposes of this discussion I'm only including interactions with Astarion as a judgement of his character.) I understand that concern, but I feel this take disregards so many other points of dialogue, and is also continually rooted in the baseline vilification of discomfort.
To further go into it, the way that he speaks about both of these interactions changes significantly if you speak to him about it once he is completely free from Cazador, and has had time to allow himself to start reconnecting with himself and his sexuality on his terms. He has absolutely No reservations about an open or poly relationship with Halsin, and says he trusts that things will be ok because he one) feels secure in Your relationship and two) Knows Halsin is experienced and trusts him to not be a messy bitch about it.
I think that shift, in combination with the in game explanation of why he isn't ok with being in that sort of relationship with the other Origin Characters (for Lae'zel and Wyll, he says they'd never agree to that. For Shadowheart, he says she's not experienced with open relationships and that he doesn't think it'd work out. For Karlach, that it would break her heart. And for Gale, he says you need standards.) is a pretty good indicator that he doesn't actually care about polyamory or monogamy. I think the vilification of that choice relies on you picking and choosing when you do or do not believe Astarion or just outright not liking non-monogamy in the first place. This interaction has more to do with the player's choice and comfort level, and so is not as important to the broader discussion I am trying to have in this post.
The interaction that is more pertinent to not Allowing him to make decisions is, I think, the drow twins. If you interact with the drow twins after the completion of the Cazador questline, he is outright giddy at the prospect of interacting with the Drow twins. Specifically stating that he is excited to see how he likes these sorts of things now that he's free.
NOW- I do NOT think that he enjoys the act. The game makes that abundantly clear, and I'm not arguing that he has a great time. He obviously does not, and dissociates during it. That being said, allowing this interaction to happen does not make a player evil or selfish. You are not playing the hero if you decide to moderate his choices just because you do not think he is ready for it. Once again, no one is evil for Not doing it either, and I am not saying anybody has to want to. I am just saying that treating this choice like it is an evil choice to make relies on completely disregarding what He wants to do.
Astarion says so many times in the game that he is anxious about finally having the freedom to find out what he wants to do, and I think that his excitement for the drow twin exchange is one of the opportunities the game gives him to make a choice. He makes that choice- And it sucks for him. He doesn't enjoy the act, and having done it he would be able to move forward knowing that. I think it's really cool and important that the game represents that facet of recovering as a victim. While you are trying to renavigate who you are, you are going to make a million new choices you never had before. And sometimes those choices are going to suck ass. It would be a different matter if he knew these things would hurt him and went ahead and did them anyway. But so many people expect him to move forward avoiding even the Potential of being hurt, and I think that is extremely reductive of his arc and who he is.
Beyond the matter of interpersonal relationships, the choice between Ascending or not Ascending Astarion is not a matter of choosing the lesser of two evils. It is a choice between his fear and his humanity. Between letting his trauma and his fear define him for the rest of his immortal life, and allowing him the vulnerability of deciding who he is when he isn't running from the world. When he's willing to listen to the parts of himself that want to do right, that wants meaningful connection, that wants to be proud of himself. That wants to meet himself. To confront who he is when someone else isn't deciding that for him.
Astarion as a character is extremely ambitious, inquisitive, and adventurous, three traits that only become more and more evident as he breaks free from letting his own fear dictate how he lives his life. I don't understand how so many people can see him and want to take the core of his character away from him, when he spends the entire game fighting desperately to take it back.
Victims are not casts of the abuse they have gone through. Their shapes may be changed by the hands of others, they may have to relearn how to be the person they want to be. But they are not broken or irreparable or fragile. They do not need to be freed from the grip of one person to be held tight in the grip of another. It is so fucking unfair and self-important to think that your hands will be the ones that fix them. That your hands know better than theirs. I think the kindest thing you can do for a person is to trust them with themselves, and to listen when they tell you who they are and what they want. Please listen to the voices that have only just learned to speak. It is the only way they can get better at doing it.
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butchedemup · 4 months
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kristen applebees they could never make me hate you bc wdym that you’ve been going nonstop for months and went through your first lesbian heartbreak and then had to keep going and play cleric of a god you don’t really care about as much as you should because she reminds you too much of yourself. and what do you mean you’re immediately thrust into a new school year where you actually have to give a fuck because it’s important and you’re going to run for class president. and your god who you haven’t exactly been nice to finds out that you’re the constant in fucking up devout relationships to the point where the last one died. and what do you mean you still have to take care of your little brothers because as much as you had to run away from your shitty abusive parents you just kinda .. left them there still. i’m very much looking forward to kristen’s development this season and just based on how beardsley has been playing her as just unhinged and a little indecipherable that she will learn the ramifications of her actions just a little bit too late
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austinsastrology8991 · 11 months
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> moon in houses <
The moon is the real you; its the reflection you see when you look into the mirror. Its the version of you that comes out when you stop showing everyone what they want to see.
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Moon in the 1st - You are the moon and because of this, you look emotional. But you put on this face to protect yourself, but the very fact your putting on a face tells me and everyone else; that your emotional. And this should be fine but many people like to poke at defensive people for the simple fact that they are reactive. But your a comfortable person to be around... until you start getting defensive. Moon in 2nd - You are a pretty stubborn person and you get emotional if you don't get things your way. since your aware you want your way; you make sure to get your way. And so your usually comfortable to be around because we atleast know what will make you happy > your like that baby that needed its go go juice Moon in 3rd - You need stimulation to survive. So your a pretty interesting person to talk to, but you were probably an annoying kid. but now as an adult, you've kept your childlike spirit, and in all likelihood it was because of your overactive mind in your childhood. Which has stayed the same. Yay. Moon in 4th - You keep your feelings private because your emotional. This is good though because others usually respect your boundaries because they are aware it can hit a nerve. You were raised well, and it could be very emotional thing to think about, but full of nostalgia. but because of this comfortable way you were raised, your lowkey a lil soft. Ik you hated that, but people eat this shit up Moon in the 5th - Your like a painter or you own a cringe ass blog or something. You love to keep your hobbies private, because they mean so much to you. But if someone gets you talking about what you like; your very passionate. So when someone shows the slightest disinterest in something you like; you get pretty insecure.
Moon in the 6th - You need to feel useful otherwise you feel incomplete. You are always working and whether that be just ideas inside your head, or getting that bag; you won't feel satisfied unless you have accomplished something. Moon in the 7th - You are looking for emotions in others so you always show your emotions. You have a compulsive need to understand others, and a good way to do this is by getting them to open up to you. So you show a smidge of your vulnerable side to see how much the other person will show you. Moon in the 8th - You are trapped in an emotional pit of fear. And you struggle to escape your epiphanies of existionalism/ traumas of your past. You know why people are the way they are, and thats why your careful in how you communicate to others; you don't want to see them have a worser emotional reaction, when it already is bad enough (as they provoke deep unsettling feelings within) you attempt to transform others emotions in hopes it’ll change your own. Moon in the 9th - You are almost devoid of feeling, because your so focused on interpreting the deeper meaning of things, which in all honesty detaches you from your feelings more often than it connects you to it. Moon in the 10th - You are master oogway, you understand others well and know how to put others at ease. But because your so focused on your reputation, you confidently tell others you can be their confidants. And whilst you do understand psychology well, you neglect your own well being to save face. Moon in the 11th - You have many friends that are emotional/sensitive and act defensively. But I believe you meet these people so you have a broader understanding of emotions, and can connect the dots that others could not have > especially given how we are all caught in our own emotions. But this makes you relatively fearful of potential ramifications of your own emotions; because you have seen the best case and the worst case scenario many times over. Moon in the 12th - You don't understand your emotions. Or others emotions. It's kind of a sore spot for you. And because of this you may not be all that defensive towards others because you don't understand when your in a dangerous situation. and this may contribute to why you run in dangerous situations often; because you trigger people like a sensor with ur lack of awareness and clear openness
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If Geto and Gojo were so close, why didn't Geto try to convince Gojo to defect with him?
Because Geto knew that Gojo’s support would guarantee his success, but that success would come at the cost of hurting Gojo.
I believe that Geto cared more about protecting Gojo than he cared about building a better world.
..
Let me explain…
First, let’s talk about why it would’ve made sense for Geto to ask Gojo to join him:
(1) Gojo would’ve been Geto’s most important / most powerful ally
By the time of Geto’s defection, Gojo is already the strongest sorcerer in existence. He and Geto are two of only three special grade sorcerers. Having them both on the same side is essentially an automatic win.
(2) Gojo should’ve been (relatively) easy to persuade
Gojo had already told Geto that he didn't like having to save the weak and didn't care about the moral justifications for it…
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…Geto has also seen that Gojo doesn’t always value / protect human life. He was ready to massacre the Time Vessel Association without reason, but ultimately he didn't, because he deferred to Geto's judgement…
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…and, most importantly, they are best friends on a DEEP, unparalleled level. Geto is Gojo’s “one and only” best friend.
If Geto was truly dedicated to changing the world order, Gojo should’ve been the first and most important person that he tried to recruit to his insurgency / cult / mission.
BUT
Not only does Geto make zero effort to reach out to / recruit Gojo, he actively avoids him and pushes him away...
- - - - - Keep reading cut - - - - -
After he kills the 112 non-sorcerers, Geto runs into Shoko in Shinjuku. He happily approaches her and willingly answers her questions.
Look at his smiling face in their interactions:
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But, when Shoko calls Gojo, Geto leaves before Gojo shows up. Gojo tracks him down anyway and demands an explanation. Geto still doesn’t want to talk about it (“You already heard it.”)
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It's strange, right? Geto loves talking about his vision of a better world with everyone else.
Then, there is this confusing progression of dialog:
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Geto is hurt/annoyed that Gojo doesn’t believe in him, so he points out that Gojo’s argument against his plan is invalid. The plan is possible (“You could do it”), therefore (according to Gojo’s own logic) it’s not “pointless.”
In a way, Geto is admitting that he knows it would make the most sense for Gojo to join him.
But before Gojo can respond, Geto pivots to saying something extremely hurtful. He's questioning who Gojo is / would be if he wasn't the strongest. Is there really anything more to him? (See more detail in my post here).
Then, in the very next panel Geto turns and starts walking away.
In summary: (1) Geto avoids Gojo, (2) Geto only argues in favor of his plan when Gojo forces/baits him, (3) Upon invalidating Gojo’s opposition to his plan, Geto immediately puts emotional distance between them, (4) Geto then puts physical distance between them.
Why is Geto trying so hard to make sure that Gojo won’t follow him?
Is he just being prideful about doing this on his own? Is he so angry at Gojo's arrogance that he'd jeopardize the success of his life's mission over it?
These arguments aren't in line with Geto's characterization / known motivations (see the end of this post, if you're interested in more on that.)
Geto's main motivation is (a twisted form of) compassion. He wants to end the suffering of sorcerers.
He is a thoughtful, contemplative person, and would've thought about the ramifications of recruiting Gojo.
What are the ramifications?
If Gojo joins the cause, Geto’s plan would succeed, but Gojo would suffer for it.
Like anyone who joins Geto's cult, Gojo would become a pariah / fugitive from Jujutsu society. He’d kill people. He’d kill other sorcerers.
But because Gojo has the singular level of strength/ability to kill non-sorcerers en masse, he would commit the vast majority (or all) of the murder / destruction. The legal, social, and mental impacts would be most severe on Gojo.
(Also, at this point, I think Geto may still question whether he’s made the right choice. It’s difficult to go from a hardline stance on protecting non-sorcerers to wanting to gen0c1de them, within the span of a year, without any lingering ethical qualms. So he may be worried about moral costs to Gojo as well.)
Let’s remember that Geto (canonically) deeply loves Gojo. Gojo is his one and only best friend. Geto worries about Gojo when he overworks himself protecting Riko. Geto is shocked when Toji kills Riko in front of him, but he only flies into a rage when he thinks Toji has killed Gojo. (Again, see my post here for more on how much Geto loves Gojo).
So, it makes sense that Geto is ready to make sacrifices to create a better world, but it’s a cost he’s willing to put on his own head. Not Gojo's.
Ultimately, Geto cares more about Gojo than he cares about achieving the mission he has dedicated his life to.
The last thing Geto says to him is this:
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What he's really asking Gojo is: "Have you stopped loving me, now that I've committed myself to this dark path? Would you kill me to save them?"
If Gojo hates Geto enough that he’d kill him, then Geto never had a chance of recruiting Gojo in the first place.
Of course, Gojo can’t make himself hurt Geto. He still loves Geto too much.
Geto protected Gojo by pushing him away.
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Addendum:
I'll also argue against two other possible explanations for Geto's behavior.
(1) Geto is jealous / prideful /wants to build his own legacy without Gojo stealing the spotlight
Geto has clear motivations for his goals and they’re not egotistical. He wants to end the suffering of sorcerers caused by non-sorcerers’ existence (e.g., Riko’s death, Mimiko & Nanako’s abuse).
Geto’s pride isn’t hurt when Gojo becomes the strongest. The only thing that bothers Geto is that they’re getting sent on separate missions.
After Gojo becomes stronger that him, Geto still has overt affection for Gojo (e.g., he asks Haibara to bring back sweets from his mission so he can share with Gojo).
Although Geto does believe in his superiority over non-sorcerers, he doesn't feel superior over other sorcerers and doesn't struggle with his 'inferiority' to Gojo.
Does Gojo’s lack of faith in Geto’s ability (calling his goal “impossible”), spur Geto to want to prove himself? Yes, probably. But Geto had already been avoiding Gojo before he said that. And I don’t believe that wanting to prove himself to Gojo would overshadow his stronger motivation to build a better world for sorcerers.
(2) He thinks Gojo actually is too moral to join him
After Geto kills the 112 non-sorcerers, Gojo is shocked and upset by what’s happened, but not once does he insult Geto or imply that Geto has done something unforgivable. In fact, he’s practically begging Geto to explain himself because he wants to be able to justify his actions. And, again, Gojo’s argument against Geto’s plan is NOT that “it’s wrong,” it’s that “it’s impossible.”
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mochinomnoms · 4 months
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Just thinking about ocean things and how twst would be different to our world. Was watching a video of a guy finding hermit crabs using trash as their homes and remembered how I went to volunteer when I was younger to clean up the beach (I had to do volunteer hours for school) and how there was so much trash. Just... imagine going with the mer trio to the beach and it being so clean and going to a reef where everything is so healthy.
I can see MC commenting on how beautiful, untouched, just how clean the beach is. The mer trio would obviously be confused cause most beaches are like this. Even the tourist traps take care in preventing too much trash from getting into the ocean. Too much trash effects the environment plus people live there and think of the political ramifications if land dwellers dumped all their trash on the mer people (or maybe that may have happened in the past but doesn't anymore idk).
Imagine the look of horror on the mer faces when MC tells them about the floating trash island, melting glaciers, and coral bleaching. Oh God and the oil spills! Mer trio would be making sure MC never goes back there
Oh they're for sure horrified hearing about the state of the ocean on our world. It's an awful thing to imagine to them and even harder to comprehend! It's correct that the ocean in TWST is incredibly healthy and beautiful, mostly because of merfolk and land dwellers making an effort to keep merfolks' home undamaged and avoid a war. I imagine something still broke out many many years ago, especially as technology advanced and TWST entered the equivalent of the Industrial Revolution. Ideally, after a brief period of war, more magic was incorporated with technological advances (technomagic) to reduce the negative effects of industrialization on the environment. I headcanon that around this time Ignihyde would've been established as a dorm as it's students are known for incorporating technology with magic.
Moving on from that though, the Octotrio are especially inclined to keep you in their world, especially knowing that your world's oceans are dying. Why go back when you have a perfectly good world here (with them, but they might not mention that last part).
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raz-writes-the-thing · 6 months
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Something New (The Boys Drabble)
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Billy Butcher x Fem!Reader 18+ ONLY / requests are open
Summary: Slapping Billy doesn't go the way you think it would.
CW: slapping, rough sex, name calling
The Boys: (send an ask to be added to an ask list!)
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It wasn't necessarily an accident, but it wasn't on purpose either. Billy had been up in your face for the last twenty minutes telling you what a filthy whore you were for him with his dick buried balls-deep in your cunt. He was that mean kind of dominant that you lived for deep down— your best well-kept secret. 
But he was getting a little too mean, a little too cocky, and you'd slapped him. Not hard, mind you. Just a little wake-up call to snap him out of it. And the look he'd given you? Sent chills of pleasure down your spine. He stopped thrusting to look at you, a wide, massive predatory grin spreading over his features. 
"That's how you want to play, eh, love?" Punctuated with a brutal thrust right into your g-spot. "You slap like a girl. Do it again. Harder."
Your hitched breath had given way to a yelp at that hard thrust, and that cocky glint in his eye had you clenching around him tight. You slapped him again, a little harder this time. Billy shook his head and tutted comically with his tongue. 
“You call tha’ a slap, do y’ah? Pathetic.” 
You grunted with frustration, but the harsh slap to your clit that he gave you stopped that right in its tracks. You slapped him once more, hard. He groaned, eyelids fluttering with pleasure.
“That’s more fucking like it, love,” he growled, gripping you by the hips and slamming inside you over and over, not caring about the way your entire body began to shake with the pleasure of your oncoming orgasm. 
“Once more love, eh? One more and you can fucking cum like the pathetic little whore you are,” he grunted, panting and fucking himself into you so harshly you were worried about bruising on your lips. Not that you could really think about the ramifications of that behind the fuckdumb haze clouding your thoughts. 
Between your pants and mewls of pleasure, you managed to land one more hard slap to his cheek and Billy snapped, surging forward to bite down on the join between your neck and shoulder almost hard enough to draw blood. 
His hips jack-hammered against your cunt and between the relentless stimulation of your g-spot and the bite on your shoulder, you came. Roiling waves of pleasure made you scream out his name, your body jerking like a pornstar possessed. 
You couldn’t control the way you moaned and jerked against him, and when he finally pulled his teeth off your shoulder, his eyes were practically black with desire. 
“My little fuckslut, eh? Yeah, tha’s right. You know what you are,” he grunted, pressing a hand down on your chest as he got closer to his own orgasm. “Been fucked absolutely fucking dumb, haven’t you?” 
You nodded mindlessly, overstimulation starting to set in. 
And then he finally came, his chest rumbling as he fucked his cum into you. His head rolled back with pleasure as he finally let go, and the way his fingers squeezed against your chest had you grunting too. 
Fuck, you think you’ve discovered something new about yourself today. 
And possibly something new about Billy, too.
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sassasafreeaction · 9 months
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It’s time to talk about the Laudanum Lesbians, Elspeth and Wee Morag. Right away, it’s pretty obvious that you’re supposed to draw parallels between them and Aziraphale and Crowley. When the viewer first meets Elspeth, we get this gruff girl who threatens the two of them and is established to be doing something “morally wrong”. Life hasn’t been kind to her, and she clearly doesn’t trust people. To really drive it home, she and Crowley are on the exact same page while they’re talking to Aziraphale and wheeling the body to the alley. 
Then we meet Wee Morag, and it becomes apparent that every decision that Elspeth makes is to better their life together. She offers Wee Morag food (which is something our favorite demon is wont to do for his partner) and specifically oversells it as something fancier than it actually is. Wee Morag calls her an angel. It’s meant to be a little tongue and cheek since it’s in the presence of a literal angel, but it also serves as a way to show that while Elspeth may not be a Good person, that she at least cares about the person close to her.
Now for Wee Morag at this moment, we don’t get much from her aside from her obviously being the moral compass out of the two of them. She tells Elspeth that she's going to Hell literally two seconds after referring to her as an angel. The more important part of this interaction I would argue is Aziraphale’s response to Wee Morag. Some part of him recognizes a kindred spirit in her. He takes off his hat in a show of sincerity and says that it was lovely to meet her. This is important for later in the episode.
After they fail to sell the body, all three of them end up back in the alley with Wee Morag. Elspeth is again choosing to not trust Aziraphale despite his change of heart to do what he now knows is actually a good thing. Wee Morag starts off on the fence, worried about those souls that won’t get into Heaven. Elspeth tells her that she promised to help, and through everyone’s various methods of convincing (tempting may even be the better word as there is a demon sitting next to her when she agrees), Wee Morag says that she’ll do it because that’s what friends do. Regardless, she’s now had her change of heart. Although I would say hers is more driven by the same thing that drives Aziraphale to help with the Antichrist. It is fundamentally for her and Elspeth’s benefit, not the Greater Good per say, but she needs that reframing of doing the moral thing of upholding her promises and potentially helping people.
In the graveyard, Elspeth does all of the hardwork and Wee Morag holds the light both to assist how Elspeth sees, but also likely to help her keep watch. She’s filling a guardian role for Elspeth. Later when Elspeth sells her body, she even says “She only wanted to look after me.” Upon seeing the actual body (a priest’s body no less), Wee Morag realizes with horror what they’re doing - the potential moral ramifications stare her in the face. She ends up caught in the crossfire of a gun, and she dies for it.
Originally, I thought that Wee Morag’s death sets Crowley up to worry about what might potentially happen to Aziraphale in the future. In a way, I still think it does. She was the Good character helping the Bad character, and she pays dearly for it. His line “It’s a bit different when it’s someone you know, isn’t it?” while pointed at Aziraphale can be felt by everyone in the room. Elspeth has been dealing with death this whole episode, but her whole life is turned on its head when her ‘pal’ dies. Crowley recognizes that it’s the knowing part that actually causes something to hurt. (It’s one of the reasons why he doesn’t have many human friends. He does have a friend though, and it would absolutely gut him to lose him.)
The episode isn’t over though. We still have to watch someone else pay for stepping over the imaginary boundary of Good and Evil, except rather than it being Aziraphale, it’s Crowley. Like Wee Morag, he steps out of his usual role and helps Elspeth, and for that, he pays dearly. He gets dragged off to Hell to have whatever Demons do instead of a rude note done to him. After everything that’s happened, it’s no wonder why you get that panicked shout of “Crowley” from Aziraphale. They just watched the worst case scenario happen for people like them. 
Also as another quick fun aside, both sets of characters are bound by something that allows them to not be able to carry out their actual dreams and goals. Elspeth and Wee Morag were bound by poverty while Aziraphale and Crowley are bound by their respective Head Offices.
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