#cause I can Remeber how I used to look and who I used to be. but no one else can. and new people don’t know.

[natugood]

I never realized how much of a positive impact it would have on me mentally and emotionally, but I am so happy I got top surgery. Yes, I do still feel sad and miss my breasts, because they were a part of me that I grew into and learned to love. But I feel so SO much more myself without them.

I get to exist without the constant, subtle pain, the reminder that my body isn’t mine for some reason, even though I know that it is, or at least that it should be. It’s like before I was existing as myself but through a warped mirror, seeing a reflection or version of myself which I knew to be true, but also which I felt disconnected from. Like I was inhabiting an alien clone of my real self. It didn’t feel wrong because I had never known another existence, I had never seen or experienced another version of myself, I couldn’t imagine another version of myself.

I didn’t let myself imagine another version of myself, because I was afraid that the joy I would experience at seeing myself as I wanted would torment me and make my life agony. I wanted to survive, I didn’t want to live in pain. But I knew I felt wrong. I looked wrong. I was wrong. But I was wasn’t wrong, I was just me. I was trying so, so hard to learn to love me. And I still love that version of myself. My breasts were a part of me, a part of my body, and even though I never wanted them there, I accepted them, because what else was I supposed to do? I wanted to love myself, and they were a part of me, so I tried. I tried so hard, but as time went on, even though they felt more and more right, they also felt more and more wrong.

I think a part of me always knew that they were temporary, that they were visitors on my body, a necessary but unwanted part of my form. When I had my surgery, I wanted to take time beforehand to say goodbye. They were a part of me. I loved them. I was going to miss them, even if I knew I would be happier without them. They meant the world to me, even if I wanted them to go away forever. They were a part of me, a part of me that made me, me. I was sleepy that day though, and I was more anxious and uncertain about the events to come than I was about whether I would have time to take a private moment to myself, to get to say goodbye. For once, I was living in the moment. The anesthesia hit much faster than I expected too; I thought I’d have a few more minutes with them, but before I knew it, I was waking up. They were gone. I didn’t get to say goodbye to them. In our last moments together, I didn’t think about them at all.

When I woke up, my body felt strange, and pained, and lacking. As the days went by, I felt the same numbers that I had felt before, though in some ways it was exacerbated by the post surgery dressings. But beneath the numbness, it felt good. So good. It took me awhile to really register that goodness, to even register they were gone.

So much of the time they existed I tried to ignore them. Your chest isn’t the focal point of your existence anyways, so I didn’t think about it a lot, or at least I tried not to. But with them gone, it felt like a part of me had been released. The constant pain, the fear, the awareness of their existence - vanished. The surgery was not the beginning of the process. It was slow, and had been ongoing over since I got my first binder, eight years before. I’d compressed them, tried to live without them, tried to forget their existence for so so long. It felt fake that I could finally relieve myself of that burden.

And now, there I was. In my own body, but insufficient another alien body. Trying to reacquaint myself with myself, the myself who I’d know but never gotten to see, the myself who I had become. As time has gone on, I have felt no regret. I don’t see my body through a warped perspective anymore. I just see myself for who I am. I am finally myself. I get to be happy now. I am free.

#Idk what prompted this I am just rambling here but like. man #also I have a WHOLE ADDITIONAL RAMBLE ABOUT HOW MY TRANSNESS AFFRCTS MY SENSE OF TIME #ANS HOW TIME EFFECTS MY SENSE OF SELF #cause I can Remeber how I used to look and who I used to be. but no one else can. and new people don’t know. #but it’s WEIRD cause that’s true with everyone!!! not just trans ppl!!! it’s just that gender is *supposed* to be absolute and concrete. #so it feels like a secret that my past experiences don’t match the assumeptions ppl have about my past experiences #ya know? #anwyays. #I am. drunk. #googoogajoob #trans pride #trans masc #top surgery

[writingoddess1125]

Theater Brat pt. 3 🎭

Buggy x FemReader

Some more Angst then Fluff but still fun!

You felt like your head was pounding, groaning softly as you felt yourself come to. Was it the alcohol from the party in Tangerine town?.. but you don't remeber drinking that much?.. It wasn't until the image of Buggy's eyes on you that evening that everything came to and you snapped your eyes open finally.

It was almost pitch black but with a single spotlight on the ground about 10 ft from you, yourself seated on what could only be described as a wooden red throne. Sitting up you see you're dresses in a far too expensive gown, very similar to one from your favorite musicals but dyed a sky blue color as well as jewelry hanging down from your ears, neck and wrist. Even a ring placed on your hand which was gold with a sapphire in the center.

A sense of panic hit your chest as you tried to sit up- far too quickly as the ache in your head returned. Making you sit back down on the chair.

"Sorry, those Muggy Balls can cause drowsiness and headaches.. I thought I gave you the smallest one I had but- seems it was still too strong" You heard a all too familiar voice say, turning to see Buggy standing just to the side of the throne. Leaned against it as he used one of his knives to clean under his nails-

"B-Buggy what the hell? I agreed to go with you- why did you?"

"To make it easier, it's harder to sneak a person put instead of just kidnapping them while unconscious. Way quieter" He said with a crooked grin, Leaning back up and walking around the throne like chair. Looking you over like a predator who had finally caught their prey.

"And the costume?.." You questioned, swallowing thickly as you saw his eyes linger over your form.

"Just a gift, for your care of me while with the Strawhats" He said with a smile. His hands playing with your hair as he stepped to your left and sighed contently at the sight of you.

"Bring it here!" He yelled at some shadows in the corner, before a grand desk was brought out and set infront of you by two of his crewmates. The finest of pens, pencils, paints and paper also set upfront of you, as well as a bowl of fine sweets you had once expressed enjoying and even popcorn.

You couldn't help but feel both flattered and a little scared how much he had thought this threw. Your favorite snacks, your favorite drinks, he had truly listened to it all and you hadn't even realized it.

"I have prepared my best show yet, and as promised. No 'Gore' or anything to scare you Doll' He said teasingly, which surprisingly drew a chuckle from you.

"I hope you enjoy, and I do want to see what you can draw up for me" He said with a wink as he stepped back from you and into the waiting spotlight.

"Ladies and Gentlemen! Boys and Girls here to witness the greatest show of all! Buggy' Circus of Delight!" He announced, the lights coming on all around you as flocks of different acts came out in at first a symphony of chaos. Before they organized in a perfect rehearsed fashion.

Act after act was done perfectly, from the dancing Lion, to Buggy's juggling act which even included his own head that made you laugh st your seams. Musical numbers of your favorite songs, Acrobatics, Contortionist and everything under the sun.

By the end of it you were Grinning ear to ear and applauding the group.

"That was absolutely wonderful! You all are very talented and lovely, I'm impressed" You praised, which earned received smiled from the crew. Buggy walked over to you and leaned against the chair again to see what you had made, Grinning widely at the drawing you had conjured up.

"Perfect-" He muttered, You looking up at him to see his eyes on you and not your painting. Blushing a bit as you smiled.

"I'm glad you like it Buggy! I wanted the highlight the diversity and talent of your show" You said, cheerfully, however you were surprised when Buggy detached his hand and gently grabbed yours. Looking to see you had removed the bracelets and ring-

"You took them off?" He questioned, raising a brow at said jewelry on the desk.

"Oh I didn't want to get ink on them or scratch the paper" You admitted with a calm shrug. He frowned slightly.

"If they were damaged or you don't like them I'd get you new ones" He said with a shrug, Acting like the jewelry wasn't that important or hard to find.

"(Y/N) I promise I'll give you anything you wish for. Nothing is too expensive for you" He said, his eyes glowing with that same emotion as before- one you didn't know until now... obsession.

"There is no need for that, I promise. Besides Buggy this stuff is lovely but far too expensive for me. This could cost most people a fortune and I have never worn expensive things" You emphasized, but saw Buggy smile and pick back up the ring and slide it back on your finger. Giving your hand a gentle squueze.

He waved over his crew members who brought his throne over- you realizing he must have had a second throne for you either brought up or made as his own was sat next to you, his hand still holding over yours. As if also rehearsed a large meal was brought out and set on open spots of the desk. You noticed how much this seemed to be planned- the show, dress, jewelry even the lunch and snacks gifted to you... it was perfectly planned.

"Say what did you think of the juggling?-" Buggy said quickly, pulling your mind from yout questioning thoughts like he could read you so openly.

You and Buggy talked for a while, eating lunch together and tlaughing. Buggy expressing delight in the artistic rendering that you had made and even flexing his arm to show that he was way buffer then most, laughing you to break out in giggles which he clearly enjoyed

"This has been delightful Buggy, But I must get back to my crew" You said with a happy sigh having enjoyed the day greatly despite the scary start, not catching the darkened look that grazed Buggy's eyes.

"Alright, But it has been a long journey and show for you. How about you take a bath and rest a little? I have a room you can use" He said with a kind smile, which seemed off in a way. However you nodded non the less.

After the very nice bath and having a few snacks you laid in the massive bed. Dressed in the nice pajamas that one of the crew members dropped off for you.

You looked around, noticing something you hadn't noticed before. The gold looking bolts on your window so it couldn't be opened, how secure this room was and separated it was from the crew quarters. Paired with something that immediately caught you eyes- painted directly above your head was a blue bird- around its closed wings golden lines wrapped around it..

"A golden cage..." You whispered, dread filling your soul as you looked around. The expensive clothes laid in the cherry wood draws, the massive sleigh bed that was filled with the finest of of pillows and silk blankets. All the art supplies and trinkets you could ask for.. This was your cage- He wasn't going to let you out.

Rushing to the door you try the handle, feeling the door not give way and the handle not budge. Locked.. from the outside. Rapidly you started to pull at the handle, feeling tears well in your eyes as the realization fully set in.

"Oh Gods..." You gasped out, fear running through your body as you stood back. Realizing what was happening to you- A prisoner of Buggy, his own personal friend that he would never let go of-

You started to bag against the door and cry out for release but your please were ignored. Instead silence only following you- As fear crept into your system you sat at the stool near the window looking out at the sky and crying silently.

It was a few hours before you heard the sound of the door being unlocked. Watching as Buggy stepped in with a large tray of food and drinks that was clearly ment to be shared, a smile on his lips.

"I see you're settling in well- a few of my Freaks mentioned you had started to bang on the door and rattle the nob.." He said, his gaze hardening a bit while his voice stayed jovial. Watching you as you stood up from the easel and a painting you had started after crying.

"Buggy why are you keeping me here? This isn't what we agreed to! You said I could go"

"Did I?-" He said with a amused smile. You couldn't tell if this was a punishment for his imprisonment or a reward for your presence, Clearly it was as clouded to you as it was to him- He simply smiled seeing the confusion and fear in your eyes and brushed it off. Instead walking to the record player in the room and putting on one of the records, slow music began to bleed through the horn and filled the room with song.

"You're my person (Y/N) I can't let you go that easily"

Stepping forward towards your shaking form he gently wrapped one hand around your waist and another holding your hand. Guiding you to follow him in a gentle sway-

"I promise, I'll make you happy. Happier then anyone else-" He said calmly, his hand holding your tightly as the two of you swayed to the music. A few tears running down your cheek and felt his lips kiss them away slowly. Smiling against your cheek as he pulled back just enough to look you in the eyes as the music began to come to a end.

"and I'll kill anyone who dares try to get in my way"

#x reader #one peice x reader #buggy the clown x reader #buggy one piece #buggy x reader #one peice live action #one piece

[bu-blegh-ost]

Let's analyze Captain Rose's final message (ep. 113 spoilers!!!)

I have transcribed the entire thing into my notes, and there are few parts that I believe give us some subtle hints to important lore bits. So let's take a look at these fragments, shall we?

"Even with the Emperor’s gracious accommodations, I can never feel at ease unless I’m sleeping on the sea. Tomorrow, we depart this beautiful country for one last ride."

Nothing that crazy here, but now we have a better grasp at the timeline. So this confirms, that the last place Black Rose Pirates have been to, before they departed for the final adventure led by Hendrix's map was Onowa Country, and judging by what comes next, the chest was also created and left there during that last stay.

"But…if you’re hearing this, it means we all died."

If you recall, Drey mentioned few episodes back, that thier final excursion was of little significance, barely worth remebering. But here Rose is, about to embark on it, his last adventure before he retires, and he believes that he's going to die. That they all are. Rose must have hidden the true importance of this adventure from the rest of his crew. He KNEW that it's very likely they are not coming back from it, he KNEW he is not actually retiring. So, the question is, did Rose truly meant to leave life at sea for his wife and children, or did he chose to retire cause he knew he was about to die and he needed an excuse, to tie all the loose ends before he goes without alarming anyone?

"Even so, freedom can look so different for the individual. Not every pirate’s gonna play fair. I’ve been prepping for this moment a long time. The day I’d be outmaneuvered."

Something happened to Rose before that. If you ask me, something must have been put on Rose. A spell? A deal perhaps? Something must have happened between Rose and Hendrix (I can't be sure it was him ofc, but I feel like it is pretty obvious at this point). The map he gave him was a final retirement gift. Whatever happened, Hendrix surely did or offered something that made Rose unable to refuse the last adventure. Rose was forced to open the Hole in the Sea. He was forced to attempt to free the Nameless Prince, and he knew, he is bringing his crew to possible death. He knew they may not make it out of the sea in time, before whatever he had to do takes effects, before the sea turns black. I don't believe he would do this if he could find another way. This line makes me feel like he was tricked, finally cornered by Hendrix. It would also make sense why Rose never listened to Finn's warnings when he told him abt Hendrix hiding his true arcane ability. It's possible he knew already. It's possible he was already chained by it.

"Now I fear, we’ll be remembered for something we didn’t do."

The hole in the sea. The one thing people always mention when Black Rose pirates are concerned. He was right. But it only proves, that Rose in this entire game was a tool. Just a person forced to do another's bidding, to be at the right place, at the right time. A sacrifice, but not a player. Niklaus told Chip it was Rose who opened the Hole in the Sea. And he was right, kinda. TECHNICALLY it was Rose. But he was not acting of his free will. He was forced to do it. And who made him? Well, probably the one person who knows that it was him.

"Anyways, I think I should have cared about how my friends would remember me. My family…"

A beautiful comparison between Chip and Rose. Rose sought fullfillment, legacy, Chip sought to recreate his childhood, but they both realised that what they always wanted in the end was family. Rose realized it too late, Chip did so on time. And he did manage to create a family he can feel content about, be proud of. Rose's story is a reminder for him, of how things could have ended.

"If my wife is still alive, tell her, tell our child, her child, I’m sorry."

Rose left Onowa knowing he will not retire. He knew he lied to his wife when he told her that he'll raise their child with her. Did he ever mean it? Did he know that he is doomed from the start, or was there a true intention of going back to her, before Hendrix came and his fate was sealed? Also, that makes me think that Reuben is not Rose's biological son. "OUR child" refers to the kid they had together, "HER child" might refer only to his wife's son, to Reuben. Still, he must have cared for him enough to decide that he also deserved apology.

"Thanks for coming to look for us. I knew you would.

Take care, Chip. "

I wonder if he actually knew. Could Hendrix promise him that Chip would be saved? He didn't seem to expect anyone else to make it, so it's possible that either Chip was supposed to play a special role in some way, or maybe he already did, or he was guaranteed to make it out alive regardless of the circumstances to make the journey he is on now. That could mean that Riptide Pirates were truly always destined to meet.

Okay, that will be most of my thoughts! Feel free to share yours!

#jrwi riptide #just roll with it #jrwi #chip jrwi #jrwi spoilers #captain rose #jrwi captain rose #analysis #ep 113 spoilers #spoilers

[ovaova]

Oki I’ve never wrote on here before but this is just a thought I’ve had. Might have many typos but we’re just gonna ignore that 🤭 also nsfw and Bakugo is in his 30s so don’t come for me

Oki so imagineeeeee…

Airport Pilot Katsuki

Ik it sounds boring at first but just hear me out….

Okay so like imagine him being an airport pilot, cute uniform and all-

He looks so handsome in it too, CANT FORGET ABOUTT THE CAP OR THE WING PIN TOO

The uniform hugs him so tight too, especially in all the right places

Most def the best lookin pilot out of them all

He’s def one of those pilots who stand at the door and does that nod up thing to greet the people- 😩

(I’m bad at explaining but hopefully you get what I mean 🧍🏽‍♀️)

Anyways, he always goes with the navy blue suit with gold accessories and a black tie for his pilot outfits

NOT TO MENTION THW MATCHING EARRINGS CUSTOM CUFFS TOO

Kirishima is 100% his co-pilot, you already know

They used to be in the same class during flight school and at first, Katsuki ain’t like him- not one bit

But after being paired up enough, they got along 🤭

And omg lookkkkk, they co-pilots now 💕💕

Anyways, mans take his job VERY seriously. Wants nothing more than a smooth flight too and back or wherever the fuck he’s going- unless it has something to do with turbulence or a storm

OH YEAH- man fuckin hates turbulence…but who doesn’t?

Ofc he knows it’s unavoidable but he finds it more annoying than scary unlike Kirishima who always quakes but at the same time can you blame him??

“Goddamnit red, why are you shaking?? It’s just turbulence! You’re a pilot for fucks sake!”

“OKAY AND?“

I’m with Kiri on this one but anyways…

Yeah he takes his job really serious, he really don’t play Fr

But then there’s you 😍

You in your nice lil flight attendant outfit, aww 🥰

Yeah did I mention that you and Katsuki are dating 🧐🤨 yeah he’s your man mhm

And then you have Mina, Froppy, and Denki who are your coworker flight attendants, dream team Fr dealing with all those people

Okay but back to you and Katsuki, OUU you remeber when Janet said “anytime, anyplace” ? - Yeah that’s him 💀

AS SOON AS THAT FLIGHT LANDS AND EVERYBODY LEAVES THAT PLANE - ITS ON ❤️💀

Kirishima already knows that when Katsuki starts to take off his cap and jacket to “relax” , it’s time for him to leave asap

He’s already learned that the hard way 💀

It’s basically routine atp

Once the Passengers and yalls coworkers leave the plane, he’s already there waiting for you in the cockpit 💀

Mans is in his 30s but he will make do with whatever position he’s in

Mans really made you ride him in his seat 💀 WHERE HE CONTROLS THE PLANE????

In the aisle too 💀 he really does not care

But no it doesn’t end there, so Y’know how pilots/ attendants get a hotel so that they can get on their next plane/shift yeah?

Yea he always makes sure y’all get a hotel together whenever is possible and Jesus 💀

Man is making his time worth while while he can 💀

There is no use in leaving that hotel room either cause you’re gonna be too hurt to

But at the same time, can you blame him? I mean both of y’all sometimes aren’t able to get the same hotel together, y’all have to catch diff planes, and y’all both can end up super busy so 🤷🏽‍♀️

AND y’all gotta get up early, ya he’s trying to get all his rounds in before y’all separate again-

In the shower, on the bed, IN the bed, on the floor, against the wall, or anywhere else possible 💀

And then he will have the audacity to get room service just to fill up on energy again just for another couple of rounds 🧍🏽‍♀️

Yeah so that’s my take on Airport Pilot Katsuki 🧍🏽‍♀️❤️

#katsuki x reader smut #bakugo x reader lemon #husband bakugo x reader #Bakugo #bakugo x reader angst #bakugo x reader #first post #Pilot #mha midoriya #mha bakugo x reader #mha headcanons #headcannons #teehee

[the-banana-0verlord]

 Speechless (Sebek Zigvolt x reader)

Note: Gn reader, Sebek birthday special.

***

Putting up with Sebek was impossible for most people. He was loud, arrogant and annoying. You had your difficulties with him too, but you were one of the only ones who actually hangoud out with him. On his side, he tolerated you, at best.

You were also in the same class, facilitating your contacts. Today, you were taking Alchemy class and you have been designated as partners. The assigment was a simple potion that made you understand languages you couldn’t normally.

“Luckily for us, he boasted, my mentor Lilia has told me all about this elixir, as he had used it many times! The ingredient we need to add is an alligator scale!

-Uhm, I’m pretty sure the textbook says a crocodile scale...

-Nonsense, Human! It is the word of Lilia, it certainly wouldn’t be wrong!

-If you say so.”

Begrudgingly, you put the scale in the couldron. Few minutes later, the potion was ready. You read a phrase in old Scalding Sands, a phrase he was supposed to translate to you. But when he opened his mouth, no sound came out.

“Sebek, are you okay?” You asked.

He was too busy panicking and gripping his throat to respond. The professor Crewel, noticing the distress, approached the two of you.

“What is going on? He slapped his whip against his hand.

-Sebek seems to have lost his voice, sensei, you answered while the boy was silently screaming in frustration.

-Go to the nurse’s office. It’s probably nothing but it might be a symptom of something worse.

-Yes, sir.”

***

“Upon inspection, the nurse announced, it’s just an effect caused by a potion created by the Sea Witch. It should be gone in about three days. But I’m curious, how did you manage to create it? The recipee was lost ages ago.

-We put an alligator scale instead of the crocodile one in our polyglot potion.

-Ah, rookie mistake.”

Sebek looked like he was going to jump at the trhoat of nurse Gothel.

“Well anyways, there’s nothing I can do for him. I’ll write him a note exempting him of animal linguistics class.”

***

The path back to class was very akward. You were used to his constant blabbering, so it was strange.

“So, I was thinking you might need someone to help you translate things to others, so if you want I can do it.”

He opened his mouth, but closed it when he remebered he couldn’t speak. Instead, he got his phone out and typed something at the speed of light.

I don’t need a human to tend to me! I’ll be fine by myself, thank you very much!

“Oh, okay then.”

At that, you parted ways.

***

The next day, you were eating lunch in the cafeteria when Sebek sat loudly next to you. He presented his phone to you, looking away.

If your offer still stands, I’m taking it. Mind you, I’m doing this because I pity you, not because I need it.

Turns out, communicating without speaking was way harder than he thought. He was forced to admit he needed your help. His face betrayed his offense when you burst out laughing.

“Of course, Sebek the Great, I will help you.”You teased.

Malleus is the great one, not me!

***

With your assistance, the three days went by fast. By being his translator, you were able to smooth his behavior towards others.

And truth is, he began to appreciate you more. Before, he saw you as just a lonely human who stuck to him because they had no friends. Now, he respected you, and even develloped some sort of... Fondness for you. One that he wouldn’t admit over his dead body.

He was also able to have a heart to heart with Lilia about the potion ingredient confusion. The latter admitted it was a prank and didn’t think Sebek would take his word for it.

Few days later, you found the boy at your doorstep, flowers in hand. Before you could utter a word, he shoved them in your face.

“As a thank you for helping me when I was incapable of speanking, I will treat you to a restaurant. And don’t interpret it wrongly, Master Lilia made me do it!”

You carefully took the bouquet.

“Oh, they’re lovely. When is it gonna be?

-Tonight at seven. Do not be late!

-I won’t don’t worry.

-Very well, I will await for your presence!”

***

You approached Sebek, who was waiting for you in front of the Monstro Lounge. When he heard your footsteps, he turned to face you.

“Ah, Human! Do you know you’re one minute and 35 seconds late?! Of course, as I am kind, I will let it slide,but-”

He stopped mid-sentence, staring at you while a pink tint spread across his face. For the occasion, you had worn the prettiest thing in your cupboard.

“Sebek? Are you okay? Does the potion still affect you? You asked worriedly.

-N-no, everything is fine. You look... Not bad, for a human.

-I’ll take it as a compliment. Shall we go in?

-Of course!”

Together, you entered the restaurant. Feigning like he was looking the other way, he enterwined your fingers with his.

***

Have a good day/night!

#twisted wonderland #sebek #sebek zigvolt #sebek x reader #sebek zigvolt x reader #twst sebek #twst sebek x reader #birthday boy sebek #birthday special

[celticcatgirl2]

Gender and sexuality and how they can change over time can be such a funny thing so I had one friend as a kid who at the time had just came out as lesbian (tho now I think they may be transmasc of some sort ot another but I’m not 100% sure so I’m just using they/them) and I was at the time sorta trying to very awkwardly perform straight male identity^tm and like faking stuff I just wasn’t really actually experiencing to feel normal but I was also like not an asshole about gay people. So anywyas they had said soemthing when where hanging out at Barnes & noble and we where looking through calendars and there was one with some scantily clad women on it and this friend was Liek “oh I like that one…don’t judge I have needs you know!!!” And I to both try to I guess show support and also do the middle school performance of “yeah I’m totally doing the normal teenage boy things” was like “nah I get you it’s rhe same here ” even tho it WASN’T at the time like that at all a thing I was actually personally experiencing. Which feels also like an odd story cause now I DO have my own experiences of attraction and aesthic appreciation of women (albeit still probably not quite the same way due to the idiosyncrasies of my aspec stuff) that I could probably connect with more authentically.

I kinda wonder what happened to this person they where pretty cool and talked about like marvel stuff with me in elementary/early middle school we kinda lost contact and I don’t really have a way of getting back in touch r but I wish I did I kinda just in general have fond memories of hanging out as kids and kinda wonder how we might be able to relate now espically if them being trans in some way like I vaugely heard is true…

Heh this was just gonna be a funny story about childhood that’s even funnier with how the people involved’s identity’s changed over time but I I geninuely miss my old friend now….

I Remeber they were into My Chemical Romance and knew all about Umbrella Academy WAY before the Netflix show….they liked the teen titans cartoon and identified with Raven at the time (tho there’s a strong possibility this part may have changed) I hung out at their house and we watched like the 2000s X Men and Elektra movies and also scary movie I’m pretty sure, before they came out as lesbian out parents would tease us about “liking each other” but we where really just friends and it was just needlessly awkward.

At that bookstore some weirdo evangelicals tried to prostiyze to us and I was trying to comfort them after the fact and we ended up laughing at the whole concept.

We had a pretty cool music teacher we both liked allot in our small private K-8 cause liked all the DC Marvel stuff like we did (and in their case I think they knew more about like actual music stuff too lol)

I know this is a long shot I don’t even know if they’re ON tumblr but I’m gonna tag a bunch of relevant terms and see if they’re out there. If you’re NOT this person please reblog and boost this and increase the chances of them finding it…and if you ARE this person idk if you Remeber me but I’m Alex we went to High Point together, you probably changed allot from what I vaugely heard at the end and well I have too perhaps in similar ways I’d love to reconnect with you and catch up and see we’re where both at now. You were a pretty cool friend and I genuinely hope you’re thriving now I know you’ve had allot of difficulties over the years and I genuinely wish the best for you….

#shut up alex #personal #trans #signal boost #umbrella academy #marvel #dc #dc comics #marvel comics #teen titans #my chemical romance #scary movie #mcr #queer #Gerard way #raven #raven teen titans #ya #lesbian #lgbt

[cirusthecitrus]

Horde Prime's body language and mannerisms part 3/3

"Expressing facial emotion is a privilege reserved only for Prime"

Despite Prime trying to present himself as this perfect holy being who is above feelings and emotions his face is very expressive. And he's just so fun to look at! Whether he's drawn extremely goofy, unbearably cute or legit creepy

Part 1 // Part 2

1 Prolonged eye contact 👁️👁️

Prime's second favorite activity after touching people without their consent is staring intensely at them!

He can't actually "see all", but he's still trying to grasp as much as he possibly can

Prime likes to talk, but he can also be an attentive listener when he needs to. He allows his opponents speak their mind and gives them time to think and articulate themselves. All that so he can quietly observe and "read" them and find out what they actually think before they can even say a word. It's most notable with Catra. He'd often give her that "I know what you are" look X)

In some instances his stare is used to pressure people into agreeing with him and doing as he says. Or to simply scare them

Again, I've remebered HP being much more talkative than he actually is. There are many moment in the show where Prime is just... watching and patiently waiting for something. Obesrving others just to find something that can help him channel the conversation to the right direction. Like when he waited for Glimmer to try any dish on the table so he could comment on it. Or when he watched her and waited for a needed reaction when he showed her what he's been doing to Etheria

And he also often reacts without any sound or word. His true emotions are simply written on his face. They're seen in his eyes

But when HP really wants to hide them, only then does he open his mouth

2.1. The 👁️w👁️

I've talked about this before, but it was a long time ago, plus i wrote it in a reblog to another post, so now I'm bringing this back in my own post

Throughout the show Prime quite often does this one thing where he silently stares at his opponent while a knowing smile slowly spreads across his face. His eyes don't move and at no point does Prime break this intense eye contact. It looks like his whole expression changes, but the eyes stay the same. He may be smiling now, but there's still this hidden agression and venom behind those cold eyes. This is still a death stare

Most of the time Prime does this when he finds his opponents' attemts to intimidate and threaten him amusing or when he simply tries to hide his displeasure when something goes mildly wrong

But sometimes his smile is sort of a mixed signal and it's easy to read this expression wrong. One can misinterpret it as a sign that the danger has passed and Prime is not going to do them any harm after all. But in reality this smile only means that Prime has finally decided how he's going to kill them

Just like face touching, this is one of Prime's signature moves when he's trying to assert dominance, demostrate his confidense and assure that he's still in control of the situation. Or like in s4 finale scene, to warn his future victim of upcoming danger

3. "No war, no pain"

This moment has always stood out to me and all because of this face. It's such a strange almost out-of-character expression, it's both silly and a little unsettling

Here Prime is trying to make Glimmer help him find She-Ra to active the Heart - so it should be obvious that it's all bullshit and he's ready to say anything to justify his plans and made his intentions seem noble and "good actually"

He speaks in his usual voice too. But damn this manic look in his eyes haunst me to this day

Seems like he's not even looking directly at Glimmer. It's like he dissociates for a second

In this brief moment it feels like Prime is actually done with the current world and cant wait for all this "pain" to be over. What if all this time Prime was just planning to go out in style but also take everyone with him (cause how dare the world exist without him right)? This speculation contradicts his whole "Prime stays eternal" shtick, but going all this way and destroying the universe just so he can have a flashy death sounds like a Horde Prime thing to do (just remember the finale)

Or maybe he really wants to start anew and erase all the evidence of the shit he's done to the universe over the years. Or there's actually nothing behind those eyes i dunno *pokes prime with a stick* be more nuanced damnit!

4. Ears!

Sadly, we don't see spacebats move their ears much, but I think I can still work with what we got

Despite limitations in animation Prime's ears do move from time to time. And in his case they don't exactly indicate what he feels at the moment, but rather show HP's overall emotional state. His ears droop a lot during the two final episodes, and no wonder - since at the time Prime was already losing it and growing more desperate. Plus he was literally connected to the Heart of Etheria, must be overwhelming as all hell

His ears also change position in the middle of HP's passionate speeches, probably indicating that he's getting a little bit carried away - and this idea is so cute to think about :з

5. The vessel room scene

So many interesting expressions here! Probably because this is like, the only scene where Prime is all by himself (Hordak is mainly a background noise to him really). He's not as dramatic as when he's sitting on his throne surrouned by his clones or when he's tormenting his "guests" or confronting his enemies. There's no audience to act so dramatic and pretentious for

What i've noticed is how expressionless he is around his clones when no one else is watching. No smiling, no creepy touching. He's more distant and not as intrusive when its not for a show

This scene also gives a small glimpse at what day to day life of the horde clones probably looks like, as well as at their regular dynamic with Prime. And their relationship here is more mundane and cold than it is intense and horrifying. HP sees his brothers as any other tool, and just like with tools he doesnt even think about them until he needs them for something

Maybe thats what also makes Prime's touch such a powerful weapon - he doesnt normally do that. Which makes the clones both dread and crave his attention and his touch so much

I'm analysing this whole scene simply because we never see Prime like that anywhere else in the show. I mean look! I've never seen him being hesitant before and after this moment. He is only like that around his old vessel. Which again, brings up the question of his past and whether or not there is something Prime doesnt want to come back to. This body stores memories about the First Ones, his enemies, whom he himself called tyrants. Who knows what was happening back then and how it all might have affected Prime

Another small moment I like. Its so calm and quiet and lowkey almost intimate? Again, very unsual for Prime. And then there's this almost forced bitter tiny smile. It can mean two things - Prime has trouble connecting to the vessel (boo boring) or there are some memories which Prime finds pleasant. But again - they're are only memories

6. These eyes are always watching

Prime barely if ever closes his extra eyes. Well, mainly due to them not being animated - they rarely move, and never blink. Most of the time those eyes are stuck on his face like a decoration. BUT I think this only helps to reinforce the idea of Prime being this all seeing entity

No one can sneak up to him, even if his main eyes are closed... well, unless u try to come up from the left :p

7. Blink-blink

I said Prime never blinks with his extra eyes. I was wrong! He does just that in... literally only one episode. And not just blinks - some really weird shit is going on with his extra eyes during Hordak's purification scene. It looks like a nervous tic of some sorts. Nothing like that ever happens again - not in this very episode, not in any others. Why are they suddenly so animated??

Does whatever this is in the pool water hurt his eyes or is Prime just showing his sadistic excitement over his little brother being tortured?

Also, his eyes are only doing that when Prime talks about suffering and "being freed of pain" which is... an interesting reaction (especially if you remember omy previous speculations)

Well, that's all what I could find. Hope you found my HP ramblings interesting :)

#horde prime #spop #shera #horde clones #spop meta #spacebats #the galactic horde #ramblings #long post #image heavy #its doone finally #god i love this asshole

[marie76]

Season 2 Final | A through analysis on Aziraphale's behaviour in the last 20 minutes

Hi!!! Hope you're doing great. So I finished good omens a few days ago. Wanted to talk about it somewhere so I logged back into tumbler. Please forgive my broken English.

I kept thinking about the last minutes of the s2 final. My very first reaction was wtf? I usually don't look into details on my first watch and naturally I miss some important things. That's why in my second and third and forth rewatch of some certain scences Aziraphale's expressions and words kept surprising me.

Let's have a chinwag

At first, when Metatron asks him to talk, he says "there is nothing left to be said, I've made my position quite clear" It's clear he doesn't want to deal with the highee ups But the Metatron kept insisting and offers him a coffee. Aziraphale asks if he should drink it, And the Metatron says yes. Something clicked here for me. He got the coffee from the coffee shop across the street. What's the name? Give me coffee or give me DEATH. Now I don't think Aziraphale really takes it as threat. Not at that moment. But In my opinion It's the Metatron's way of saying that you don't have a choice if you want to stay intact. Remeber what he said to Nina? He asked if people really ask for death? So thoes who go to the shop don't have a choice but to buy a drink. They dont want death obviously.

Back to the shop

Before going back we see him have a brief chat with the Metatron. He is clearly nervous. He is definitly scared. He keeps looking away and doesn't make long eye contacts with him and have fake short smiles. Then he comes to the shop and I think he becomes a bit calmer. Which is kinda cute if you think It's because Crowley is there.

He manages to keep his shit together just before him and Crowley start talking. At first I thought that he was really happy. But he was not. We know how he really looks like when he's truely happy. When he wanted to be a magician or when he was dancing in the gentelmen club or when he was talking about taking the Bently. There were real joy inside his eyes, a bit cocky even. He didn't keep his eyes off Crowley. Actually, he didn't have any problem eating him out with his eyes in public. While talking about the Metatron's offer, he smiles but thoes are not smiles of joy. He keeps eye contact but there are times that he still looks away.

From now on some speculations are mixed with the analysis. You can call them delulu as well cause I'm delusional.

The Offer and The Good News

Well I think that Aziraphale takes the possibility of the Metatron listening to their converisation into consideration. That would explain why he was harsh on Crowely that much. He can't seriously think that Crowley would go to heaven without absolute urgency, hell, HE HIMSELF didn't want to go back to heaven.

As soon as Crowely's name comes out of the Metatron's mouth he tensed a bit.

The Metatron say you can make your friend an angle again. We know Aziraphale doesn't want to change Crowley. He loves him the way he is. He never tried to change him (atleast not that I remember) they talked and drinked together without trying to change eachother FOR 6000 YEARS.

(That can be the case but I also think It's possible that Aziraphale thought if they are both angles then no one would bother them like they did in the past-This part was said by a friend so Credit to my lovely Dora)

but he can't explain things to Crowely then and there because the Metatron might be listening.

Confession | The Beginning of the End

Crowley starts confessing. That's when Aziraphale starts losing his cool again. He looks the other way which I assume is the window but I may be wrong. He also look away from Crowley a few times.

When Crowley says "Just the two of us" (45:05) for a really really short time his right lower eyelid goes up a little. Perhaps I'm reading too much into it but I think he's like "are we really doing this NOW?" Which is kinda funny lol. As Crowely was saying "heaven and hell are toxic" he shakes his head nervouslly multiple times. As if he wants him to stop saying thoes. Why? The fucking Metatron

"Come with me"

Well this part is really interesting because I see it in everyday life pretty often specially during the argument. When, you ask? Well, in the middle of an argument, when things get heated, some people tend to get closer to the other person,Talking closely to another with a lowered voice with words coming out calmly is usually used to convince the other, as if to believe that if articulate calmly, the other will undrestand your point better. I think that's what Aziraphale was doing there.

When Crowley wants to leave he begs him to go with him because Aziraphale needs him, because he's scared.

" I don't think you undrestand what I'm offering you" means "You dont undrestand what I'm trying to say in codes to you" "I undrestand it a whole lot better than you" "Then there is nothing left to say" That's where Aziraphale gave up.

There is anger, desperation and sadness on his face but there is nothing else he can do.

The Kiss

"You idiot, we, could've been us" as soon as Crowely said that Aziraphale looks away and when Crowely pulls him to a desperate kiss we can see he was about cry.

This part is my favorite. He is obv shocked, but after a few seconds he closes his eyes, his hands move up to hold Crowely for a very short while but then he removes them. After the kiss is broken he still looks like he want to cry.

"I forgive you"

I legit thought he was going to say I love you, his lips movement and the sound that came out sounded like "I l..." I think a "get out" would've hurt less💀✨. It can mean I forgive you for leaving me or I forgive you for confessing now, I forgive you for npt choosing heaven (remember, the Metatron is listening) or It's his way of saying I love you because we know forgivness is Aziraphale's favorite thing (delulu)

The Aftermath

After Crowley left the shop his eyes are full of tears, he touches his lips like a little virgin receiving his first kiss but It's a painful one.

The Metatron comes back to the shop. During their short convo Aziraphale looks away multiple times, again, and where does he look at? The window, probably to see if Crowley is still out there. The Metatron asked if he's ready to go and ✨Aziraphale still tries to stay✨"But.... My bookshop" "I entrusted it to Muriel" "but..." "Anything you need to take with you?"

Oh the Metatron is not letting him stay.

That's for sure.

"We call it the Second Coming"

Lmao there is a big "fuck" written all over Aziraphale's face. He shortly looks at Crowely before going to the elevator.

So now he has a heaven to fix and a Second Coming to stop.

The Smile

Well I have to say that smile is creepy one💀 his lips moves up and down many times as if he can't control his feelings. If you look at his shoulders you can see he is breathing rapidly. I see sadness, anger, confusion, pain and "what the fuck am i supposed to do" on his face but at the end I also see determination. The determination of a man who is so done lol.

Why Aziraphale wants to make things right? Because he knows if this system stays, the earth, Crowely and himself will always be in danger ans It's only a matter of times either heaven or hell mess things up on earth. They can run away all they want but heaven and hell won't leave them alone forever. Crowley would probably say it doesn't matter, we will run again which is a cute plan but not permenantly functional.

I didn't check the theories myself but my friend shared some of them with me. I hate the coffee theory andI don't think Aziraphale is thirsty for heaven's love like an abused child. Like I said he seemed pretty determinded about staying, he didn't want to go, even when he got to elevator he didn't want to, his heart was somewhere else but he needed to stand up and do something before thoes angles mess things up.

Well, that was my analysis + delulu's. Hope you all enjoyed it. Please share your theories and thoughts cause I love reading theories.

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens meta #aziraphale #aziracrow #crowley #good omens season 2 #ineffable husbands #neil gaiman #michael sheen #david tennant

[whoreish-behaviour]

Ayo so 9ft tall hot alien colonizers am I right 👀👀💫??? Thanks sm for writing the PERFECTION that is Revenant 💕✨️💞 BTW that fic got me thinking...

So after the events of TWOW, Miles, near dead tbh, comes across a Nav'vi woman who was separated from her family when trying to escape one of his RDA raids on the villages in search for Jake. She's terrifed of him because she remebers him, but her kind soul patches him up and nurses his weak form back to health in her makeshift home. When recovered, he takes her in for reasons immediately unknown to him or her (but he tells his commanding officer some bs about gaining the hostiles trust or something).

She, being just an average ocean Nav'vi with no warrior spirit in her (kind of like a temeperment similar to Tsireya) can't understand a word of English, and Miles can only understand 5% of what she's saying. They have lost their only reliable translator (Spider), so Miles wants to learn to communicate with her directly because he hates 3rd party communication anyway (as shown by his continued attempt at learning and speaking Nav'vi). He starts to teach her English using his very limited Nav'vi that Spider had taught him.

At first she is of course terrified of him cause he just took her to a place filled with Sky People (of which her only experices with involve deaths, cruelties, and pain). She wonders why he took her with him (spoiler: he took her cause she helped him, was cute, all alone, and the lost/scared/helpless eyes she gave him when he initially came across her got to him. I imagine she looked similar to how Tsireya looked when her dad yelled at her for her allowing Lo'ak to bond with the outcast).

As Miles starts attempting to talk to her in her language and teach her his own language, she starts seeing another side of him. The side that loves his comrades, loves his son, had listened to his sons pleas for mercy on her people, has strong duty to his people (which is respected in her village), jokes around with her and his comrades, and protects her even when really has no reason to since she's technically the enemy. She has to fight this growing warmth and respect for him with the horrible things she sees him do to her people for his mission and personal vegnece against jake, and the horrible things the Sky People he has strong loyalties to continue to do to her home of Pandora. Ofc they are also both physically attracted to each other so this can be mature rated if u feel comfortable (I surely wouldn't mind a bonding ... or several occuring).

Mostly, Miles teaching her English and trying to get past her initial fear of him and all his dominating "demon" presence when he can barely communicate with her. It'd be cute if the first thing she learns to call him is "colonel" because that's what everyone calls him. And even though he later teaches her his name, she still calls him that endearingly. Like, "Miles" is for when she's mad at him 😂.

Miles is real patient with her because she is a good girl. Shes just mostly scared and confused by many things in her new environment (her own emotions most included). Miles is mostly just being himself around her, very aware that shes watching him quite cautiously and curiously. Because of her distrust of Sky People, she's by Miles' side alot, but mostly stays silent because she can't really understand what others are saying around her in rapid English so she just pretty much ignores everyone else and focuses on her Colonel. She reads his eyes, his ears, his tail, and his breathing just to know what's really going on with him. Even after she learns some english from him, she has also learned to understand Miles without his having to speak. Miles keeps his Nav'vi by his side and she answers to no one except her Colonel. Legit Miles would be mad protective of her. No one touches her but him. Real territorial ish. I'm sorry this is getting outta hand. 😂

I just love Stockholm syndrome tropes sm! And u write it so well 😆👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👌🏽💞 certified good ish. Thanks for the thought 💡.

‘Pretty much ignores everyone else and focuses on her Colonel’ BDJSHSBBFSJHDHD SO MF CUTEEE

THIS IS AMAZINGGG I LOVE IT SM

I adore the whole idea of her being able to read him without necessarily understanding the words coming out his mouth, I think he pairs so well with someone like that (lord knows that man would rather have his tail bitten then talk about his emotions).

Would 10000% be extremelyyyy over protective, that terrified expression on your face the day he met you still makes him grimace. You’d have to always be in his eyesight or tucked safely under his arm.

I also think that once you had settled down at his side, the crew would begin to accept you more - your kind nature practically forcing them to.

Like a baby sheep being taken in by a pack of wolves that absolutely adore you.

#colonel quaritch x you #colonel miles quaritch #colonel quaritch x reader #colonel quaritch smut #colonel quaritch #miles quaritch x reader #miles quaritch smut #miles quaritch #avatar x you #avatar x reader #avatar the way of water #avatar way of water #avatar 2

[drawingsfromthefrogwar]

Long ramble incoming because I'm trying to distract myself from "work"

(；￣Д￣)

Petition to allow your poor OCs a loooong term vacation in my own SCP canon. I just want to open a portal and let them in for a while. :> Is it dangerous? Big yes. Could they encounter something worse than death? Also yes. But hear me out.

-No Mickey

-A lot of people who would punch Mickey in the face

Acceptance for Monday and the rest. I mean, Seven is trans himself. And Eight is stimming (still working on this. So far I only know that he mostly has visual stimming). Aaand Twelve uses both he/him and they/them pronouns.

Protection from Mickey and who ever decided to punish Monday. This canon is a Mickey free zone.

Uh all the O5 are anomalous in some way. Four, for example, is a reality bender. The same goes for some agents and other people working for them. So someone like Jaylynn would absolutely be accepted :>

-Remeber my Bright Rewrite? The one who gave Jay a star. Cause he's also there. Smol stars for everyone who wants them. Can also make stardust. 10/10 shiny.

I'm running out of points...but I like lists.

Oh right! People who are anomalous are usually allowed to roam the foundation location they are in freely. Unless they messed up completely. And I do mean messed up big time. Lucan almost killed Eleven while he was still with the Chaos Insurgency, and they are very very close now xD. The dude basically went "yeah I know he stabbed me and all. But he got massive skills. Also he looks sad. I want him!"

-Honestly? I'm supposed to be doing something productive. ╮(︶▽︶)╭ but nah. Keeping your blorbs safe is more important.

Genderfluid ancient alien creature that is learning to crochet and is very huggable. (Mordesh is one of my favorit sillies. The O5 and other Agents: "Alright everyone, this is a highly dangerous SCP. An apex hunter... something that can survive the most deadly environments. Even just looking at it can kill you. We need to be careful."

Some random Agent: ":o I should teach her how to crochet."

A vacation in the canon could give your staff a gift made by Mordesh.

So? Vacation time? :3

Evilverse is currently killing me so sure, hands you a box full of site 600 ocs. I'd say take care of them but frankly very little effort is required to give them better conditions from where they're coming from. Have fun have fun have fun

#cross over episode.. #this is so silly thanks for telling me about your canon :0 #maggie's asks

[zainnbug]

so ….i’ve been rewatching “The Spectacular Spider-Man” and i just wanted to give my lukewarm takes on it (just my own personal opinions!) prepare for horrible analysis and alot of words!!!!!

1. THE VILLAINS LOWKEY SUCK

i say this with an open mind because Spectacular Spider-Man is a kids show… but the villains are not good. I feel like there is very little build up on these characters origin stories and why the way they act like they do. For example electro, an ordinary repair guy who is involved in a work accident while working on machinery next to genetically altered eels. for me i just couldn’t understand where all his hatred was coming from except for the fact that he is never able to go back to his life. Like this guy is traumatized and now has to adjust to a new life that harms everyone and then boom he’s evil and hates Spider-Man (Too much Spider-Man hate and not enough I-hate-the-world kind of hate! ). There just wasn’t more of a build up to it, like i wished he tried to be like a hero just like Spider-Man then completely fucks everything up while trying to do good. I know certain life altering changes completely changes someone but i still wish he tried to cling onto his human characteristics (like his morals he once had from who he used to be). It would’ve been cool if he tried to be himself again more mentally and then threw that out the window cuz it was never gonna work out)That’s also one thing i see recurring with the villains is that they just hate Spider-Man…. But I still try to keep an open mind as it is a really short show and apparently electricity is the main source for all evilness in this show (literally).

2. He’s a hoe

heavy on this one cause pete cannot choose from liz, gwen, mj, black cat or that bugle secretary. He went from that shordy who worked at the bugle to mj to liz allan to black cat then to liz again then gwen then LIZ AGAIN then gwen again? it was like every 5 seconds he was switching sides …like oh man! liz is into me.. oh and gwen too!! and then he just wouldn’t make up his mind. This guy is a man whore I STILL REMEBER THE SCENE WHERE HE FINALLY DECIDED TO TALK TO GWEN AFTER THEIR KISS AND SHE BLEW HIM OFF SO HE STARTED THINKING ABT MJ WHILE SHE(MJ) WAS TALKING TO HIM. even she told him to get it together 😔 do better peterman

3. Mjs incredible personality✨

this one’s not too much of a big deal and i can tolerate it but it still irks me. Throughout the entire time of Mjs screen time is her personality which kind of ruins her character in this show. From the way she talks to how she flirts with everyone in the show bothers me. She flirts with nearly every guy in the show and she’s just… too flirty LIKE IT DOESNT FIT HER CHARACTER. It’s not the Mj i know but i still do luv. It’s just not in her character to act this flirtatious. It’s like she has no real personality other than being hot.

BONUS:

-the villains in this show were still enjoyable like otto octavius and venom, which are my personal favs. Also seeing marko stick up for a child being bullied and saving innocent people really did it for me. I also thought he was just some mindless spider-man hater but there’s a little more to it.

- despite peter being a hoe….erm i actually cannot find something good to say abt his hoe side srry y’all….

-despite Mjs flirty side, Mj is like the number one supporter for most of the characters in this show. She’s the one constantly checking on gwen and peter while also giving them relationship advice or just advice in general. Also she’s the first person to notice something is wrong. I like to call her a girls girl cuz she really looks out for the girls in the show.

thanks for reading my horrible takes i will be posting more like follow and subscribe if y’all actually read me yapping away and stay tuned y’all 🙏

#spider man #the spectacular spider man #peter parker #otto octavius #mj watson #across the spiderverse #i talk too much #gwen stacy #liz allan #atsv

[writingoddess1125]

Can you do a Sanji x reader angst?

Done-

Enjoy DEPRESSION!

Inertia

Support me on Ko-Fi

Masterlist <<<

'Goodbye-'

He heard it every morning when he woke up from his nightmares- at this piint dreams since he was met with the same dream every night, Rolling himself up right as the sun rose forcing his day to start. Heading down to the kitchen, both his salvation and his personal prison at this point.

" Come on Sanji!-"

You cried, pulling him along to the ship that would take the both of you away. His sister saving both your lives that day in giving you all the chance to run- to free yourself from this hellish place!-

Hidden beneath the rhythmic clatter of utensils and the sizzle of ingredients in the pan, Sanji's heart harbored a constant darkness non could see. His eyes, filled with fire and sparkle, also held a subtle emptiness that went unnoticed by his comrades- A smile on his lips as he served breakfast to them all.

Laughing along with their jokes, flirting with Nami as if only to do so to keep the endless cycle going. Cook, Flirt, Smile, Train- Repeat.

"You gotta learn how to flirt Sanji!" You yelled, Sanji shyly staring at you in question. The two of you in the hall of thr shit you'd jumped to, peeling potstos to avoid the verbal abuse of the adults.

"But why?"

"Cause you gotta get girls silly! Got to make a good impression" You exclaim, rather flamboyant in your remarks which made Sanji mutter shyly about his lack of skill.

"Here just do what I do-" You clear your throat, Before giving a dramatic fluttering of your eyes and reaching forward to touch the youthful adolescents chest flirtatiously making him blush and bat you away like a startled kitten. You laughing at his reaction.

Cleaning up he made his way out to the main deck, practicing kicks and other moves with his peers. Arguing with Zoro- but it just didn't feel the same as the arguments he used to have with you.. missing the way your voice strained and waved with the force.

Before smiling at Luffy and talking with his captain- continuing his hollow laughs and empty smiles. Not long before returning to the kitchens were he prepped.

Sanji rusing as he felt the spray of the sea, the ache in his body as he clammered over the sharp rock he was stuck on. Seeing Zeff, the pirate who had taken over their ship as he rushed to him in a fit of rage "Where are they!?" He yelled at Zeff his eyes still searching for you, the hardened pirate shining the bag of food into the child's arms.

"We are the only survivors!- Now take your half and go!"

Serving dinner, he couldn't find it in himself to eat. His mouth bitter at remembering the moldy bread and salty water.

In the quiet moments when the kitchen lights dimmed, and the crew retired to their bunks, Sanji faced the hollowness that clung to him like a persistent shadow- Like you were still there wrapping your arms around him and whispering his undeserving praises.

Shaking the feeling for a moment, he stepped from the now clean kitchen. The dark night air welcoming him as they always did, the only true thing he could remeber of your scent was the constant smell of the sea on your clothes.

Looking back, Sanji was sure Zeff could hear his anguished cried for you those first few nights. His voice fading into nothing after the third day of sobbing your name and begging for you to return to him.

He stood there, Leaning against the railing in the direction of the where he knew your marker was. The one he had planted all those years ago as the place were you had been dragged away under the sea just north of the Baratie.

Pulling out a cigarette he lit it taking a deep drag as he looked out at the dark sea before him. The one who had taken you from him- Thinking of your final words, in that kitchen area when you shoved him towards Zeff as the crashing waves overtook the ship you were both in.

'Goodbye-'

#x reader #one piece #one peice x reader #one peice live action #sanji x reader #op sanji #one piece sanji #black leg sanji #sanji #vinsmoke sanji #x gn reader #sanji angst #depressing shit #one piece angst

[gildeddlily]

BSD WEEKLY APPOINTMENTS ARE DONE kill me

for the last episode they've been kind to sigma, he looks so beautiful just like in the manga

no fyodor looks like a turtle in every flashback he's in (not in mersault tho. he's the absolute bbg in there, him and dazai) (trying to understand how people can see them as a couple) (no I do but no) (everyone is about to die and they're there)

(I just know that dazai used to think ab people the same as Fyodor, but at the awful age of fifteen he met someone who can't seem to stop surprising him. guess who) (yes it's chuuya)

silly sigma (he's accepting his death and his inability to save his home. he's accepting to have no reasons to live. he thinks he has no purpose. he's dying and he's alr with that) (feral ab the way they cut off like all sigma's backstory. like he found a fucking church in the desert you're telling me? no being a literal slave, no living in the desert with no knowledge ab anything, no being saved by fyodor?)

forget ab everything I've said ab my favourite character being sigma, bram or anyone else. Hirotsu is like there being perfect and killing me with his charm and found family trope (how he said tachihara's name, how tachihara was acting with him even if he's his superior- just remeber how he talked to Dazai back then, and then how he does it with Tachihara and Gin) (happy they included the "you're the real mafia" scene cause I needed to see it)

them carrying this whole season with sigma and this guy down there

#bsd #bungou stray dogs ep 13 #sigma bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs nikolai #nikolai gogol #bsd tachihara #bsd black lizard #black lizard #bsd hirotsu #ik the low quality is top content love me #late but happy

[mejomonster]

Started reading In The Dark, first chapter Nightmares:

Interesting vibes. Before anything else, I love the descriptions in this. I've been losing my own ability to spit out what the fuck Im trying to describe when writing lately, and the slightly poetic imagery but also to the point present tense of how this is written... it's really helping inspire me. (And of course, seeing quick examples of describing characters and buildings quickly without clumsiness but also still with some emotion is helpful)

Expectedly, the leads appear to be "two hot men" as is the bl usual ToT it is what it is. I'm partial to modu's babes still, but I'll get used to a new novel again lmao (what can I say? No character in a Long While is gonna top the fucking Captain China descriptions, the personality of priests characters screaming out so much that its ultimately the feeling of the character so unique and bizarre that you remember more than actual looks).

I am hoping, somehow, this novel's gonna be written as intelligently (as in intense themes, parallels, symbolism, points to make) as a priest novel. Im spoiled cause all the other chinese bl novels ive finished reading? Fucking excellent. I think my hopes are justified, tbh. If for no other reason than this writer doing some of my favorite shit: they name dropped a japanese murder author Ive read (and mentioned a plot of it im intrigued by), and they've left a TON of potential foreshadowing threads.

Said threads: opening, character dreams of a bloody woman? Could be a Fei Du (ish) situation where he did awful stuff and blacked it out. Could be a darker situation, where he's actually the bad guy/antihero/dangerous and we get a story from THAT point of view in some regard (which is a fascinating potential).

Character meets guy who clearly matches him, was at the theater for him, stalking him? At some prior point, started watching him first? Oh you know me. I like a slow burn. I like a long history (as long as its not childhood friends anything but that), i like rivals, its giving L X Light, Beyond Evil guys energy.

The movie playing: the stranger says he doesnt like roses. And the earlier quote from the murder novel, the Xie Lanshan remebering the quote that "even a demon essentially Id still love you." My prediction: one of them believes even cruel they'll love the other, but the other believes they'd stop loving and fight each other. This of course also implies: one will go darkside/be cruel/lose themselves/already is lost, and either that same one Or the other will not be loving the other when love is whats expected. Sort of the whole "youre a monster, but you wont hurt me" then the monster DOES hurt you. Or "even though youre a monster, ill still be here with you" (which is luo wenzhou 100 percent) but with the monster going "well that was a fucking mistake cause i am killing/betraying you now." If this novel likes foreshadowing, which i like, itll play with this AT LEAST in some case long arc. And ideally itll play out between the leading lovers. Which if so, is a story Id be interested in reading

And yes, i did go into this totally blind except knowing its (probably) a dark detective bl story. So we'll see how the predicting goes lol

For real though, i do really enjoy its writing style and the way its snappy but lingers just enough on painting images emotionally.

#in the dark #lb

[clearkidhideout]

fucked up kid

pt 2. the bonfire

y/n pov

When the bonfire starts that guy gally starts handing out jars of his "secret drink" i bet you he doesn't even know what it is. when i take a swing of the drink it burns my throat. "bloody hell, what the fuck is that". it tasted good but man did it hurt my throat. soon enough i got used to the taste and was well on my way to get a fourth cup. i stare as i walk watching the other boys including newt dance around the fire. i feel someone walk up next to me it's thomas

"hey thomas"

"hi y/n, how you holding up" he asked shyly

"pretty well actually im not even drunk yet and im on my fourth cup" i say.

He laughs "no actually, how are you i know it's only been a couple of hours but are you ok"

i stare at him "yeah im fine. being surrounded by boys is stressful but it will have to do" i give him a smile just as i feel someone yank me back by the collar of my shirt.

"for fucks sake you peice of shit" i scream at whoever yanked me back. turns out it was gally .

"hey little greenie, its a tradition of ours to fight the new green bean" he smirks at me

i just roll my eyes if he wants to fight we can fight "gally are you sure i dont want to beat your ass infront of these people" i gesture around to the other boys catching newts eyes as he shakes his head at me warning me. what the hell do they not think i can win, well ill show them.

Gally just laughs in my face " aw little girl is too scar-" was all he got out be fore i kicked him in the stomach

"for the fucking last time im not scared i dont care"

he throws me down knocking the wind out of me but not for long because i sock him in the nose just as he explains that he would end me. i hear a satisfying crunch that makes blood shoot out of his nose on to my hand which might i add was a little disgusting.

"Y/N WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO" alby runs over to me and gally yelling

"I DID NOTHING BUT FIGHT HIM CAUSE FOR FUCKS SAKE HE WANTED TO FIGHT AND HE HAD TO BLAB ABOUT BEATING MY ASS LIKE SHUT UP DIPSHIT NO ONE CARES BECAUSE I WON THE FUCKING FIGHT" i yell back

alby just looks at me in disbelief because i guess no one ver talked to him in that way which they should and he called the medjacks to take alby and fix his goddamn nose. then they brought me into this coucling room told me to sit in a chair and proceeded to agree to lock me up in what ever they call is a slammer

"you can't do that i litterally just won a fight and your locking me in a slammer what the hell is a slammer anyway" furious that they would even dare to do that.

newt says "alby she's righ-

"of course i am" i inturupt

he continues like he didn't even hear me "right we cant lock her up in the slammer because she won a fight with gally remeber minho he broke gally's arm and we let him go"

alby turns to newt and sighs pinching his nose "well what do you want me to do"

"well you could um..... you could send someone to supervise her and not let her near gally" he saind blushing a flustered

"supervise me as in babysit" it still made me pissed but ill get what i can take

just then alby looks up sharply"newt who's going to watch her. i know you on top of your job keep an eye on her"

"i have a name you know not just her its y/n and if you cant call me that dont talk" i snap back

alby looks at me "shut up y/n newt take her somewhere else out of my sight"

newts pov

bloody great i got myself into this by suggesting someone to watch her and she's mad

"what do you want"y/n snapped at me "lets go"

she turns and stomps out of the homestead even when she is mad i still think that she looks beautiful

she sits down by a log and looks at me. "am i really scary you have to keep me under your watch"

i sit down next to her " i dont think your scary just tough we need that around here maybe you could help me whip the boys back into shape"

she laughs and i make it my personal goal to make her laugh like that all the time

"you sound just like my mom" she freezes and looks at me and i have a feeling my expression matches her own

"what" i say shocked

she looks at me "what dipshit"

"its just people here dont remember their life before the glade and you do" i question her

"i dont remember anything just the important stuff. like the people i know or things that happened. i dont remember any of their names though and i dont remember what happened or how i got here " she looks at me again this time her voice is laced with a tiny bit of frusteration and confusion

"thats more than most can remember you know what your friends look like i cant even remember what my life was before all this happened" i gesture around the glade

she snorts at me " like i said before newt just important people in my life but they are like blurry pictures and its only glipses here and there, other things im not willing to share are like clear as day, and i remember you" she pauses looking shocked at what she just admitted to me

"you remember me" i ask wanting to know more

"yes, just one memory though when you asked me to come to the bonfire it reminded me of a time when you asked me to come to a party with you" she looked at me shocked again

"well glad to hear that because i think i had the same memory at that time" i smiled at her

"you liked me" she states bluntly

i was surprised "i did"

she looks at me again "damn this drink, i spilled more than i wanted to, to you and it's all because of this mother fucker right here" she shakes the drink and glares down at it which causes me to laugh

y/n pov

"i think im gonna call it a night" i say to newt

he looks at me startled "what"

"it was nice talking to you but today was stressful im tired and would like sleep so newt would you like to walk me to my bed or not" i say

"um ok"

he walks me to my bed and we exchange farewells i might not trust him but i like him enough to call him a nice aquantence

#newt x reader #newt tmr

[lilveeblog]

ੈ✩‧₊˚ JJ regression questions

How did they discover age regression? due to her childhood trauma, JJ has been regressing for as long as she can remeber. it always caused some straooin between herself and her family/friends but when she found supportive friends, she excelled with them.

Age range?i have headcanons on JJ's age ranges here! she often slips between headspaces and it can be quite turbelent for herself and her cgs.

What’s their favourite age regression accessory/gear? JJ's favourite throughout all her headspaces is her bunny ! a little pink jellycat which she never lets go of. sometimes it'll be hidden in her jumper pocket or perhaps up her sleeve, but its always with her. she also loves her paci when in a super young headpsace and often in her older headpsace (although she never admits this to anyone)

Do they have a caregiver? she has a few who look after her. the whole team care for her. Elle is a main caregiver for her in the first few seasons of the show and emily slowly takes over that role more at work - however, when elle no longer works on the team, she still lives with her and elle is her main caregiver at home.

What’s their favourite toy? she loves jigsaws and puzzles. they were something she used to do all the time with roslyn (her sister) when she was younger and its like her own little mystery everytime. her nursery is full of them. she also loves toy cars and will often race them around the office with spencer or derek.

What do they like to wear when they regress? when super small, she loves wearing long t-shrirts. usually hotch's or emily's as they make her feel safe. pants are a regular no no throughout all her headspaces.

What’s their favourite thing to do when they’re small? she loves gooing to the park, walks, being active. however, she also loves laying down and having cuddles. she is often more than happy to lay on her caregiver with her cartoons and some pink milk.

How are they different when they regress? she emotions are often a lot more turbulent which is a key sign to the people aorund her that she is regressing. she will struggle to control herself / things she says and will be a lot more outbrusty with her feleings.

What does their ideal nursery/playroom look like? JJ has a nursery, at home with Elle. I have a post about it here!

Do they have another regressor they play with? she has a few little friends but she generally prefers hanging out with her caregivers, particuarly with morgan and garcia when shes playful as they play with her.

Who knows about their regression? pretty much everyone. they all help out where they can, love her nonetheless. she's very open for about it.

What triggers their regression (positive)? icecream! stickers! rewards! she loves, being praised as it makes her feel proud of herself and good.

What triggers their regression (negative)? arguing usually. thunderstommes, mentions of her sister or childhood.

What about their regression is unusual, unexpected, or non-traditional? when in her teenspace or preteen space, she can usually still work. although her contriubtions won't be as great as in her addult headspace, she can still help out, complete paperwork.

Random headcanon about their regression! my favourite headcanon about her regression is the little space she has under hotch's desk. i can't remember who started this headcanon (it isn't mine) but it's the cutest and they'll be a post coming soon!

questions by: @agerefandom found here

#little!jj #criminal minds #criminal minds agere #jennifer jareau #jj #little space #jj criminal minds #cg!emily #jj x emily #emily prentiss