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sxtvrns · 1 year

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purity and its presence in growth

🎶 now playing: my heart it beats for you - grentperez

P: Soul (Haku Shota) x Fem!Reader

S: Moving to Korea in the peak of your adolesence isn't easy. You just happened to be there to help. How can he miss you so much even though you only knew each other for an hour? Maybe exchanging numbers was a better idea than he thought.

C: fluff, cute moments, inaccuracy, brainrot, baby p1ece don't slander me, needed to get this into my drafts immediately, kinda sloppy, drabble, puppy love, longer than it should be

N: Y/N is your first name, L/N is your last name. i saw somewhere online that said soul moved to korea when he was 13 for fnc and somehow this idea began to brew in the deep depths of my strange brain. im a little new to piwon so if i get something wrong im sorry :P any ages mentioned are korean age, not international. his name means like 'child with a pure soul' so thats why the title sounds so poetic but okay enjoy the potato child content

view the rest of the conversations ☆彡

please interact if you enjoy!

After the almost 3 hour flight to Incheon, Shota stands in the airport mindlessly, staring at his phone and trying to resist the urge to call his mom. Though he knew that she'd pick up in a heartbeat if he did, he suddenly had a rush of independence surge through his veins when he stepped off the plane, telling himself every day was gonna be lonesome and that he'd have to learn how to get around. It wasn't until he got near the exit that he realized he had no idea what to do.

He should ask someone. There was a high chance quite a few people on that flight could also speak Japanese, but even so, he couldn't muster up the courage to talk to anybody. So he stood awkwardly, out of the way, watching all the people walk by and glance at him periodically.

He'd been studying Korean during his break time at school while at home in Japan, but he was afraid he'd say something wrong and embarass himself.

His eyes wandered amongst the people, and past the crowd of tall adults, there was you. A girl, who looked around his age, spacing out by some suitcases while some other adults, probably your parents, were talking to the clerks at the service deck. He took a deep breath, dragging his suitcases along with him as he shuffled past the bustling crowd and up to you.

"Excuse me." He mutters, catching your attention. "I need... to go... to this place. I.... don't know how." Your head tilts a little, confused while the cogs begin to turn in your head while he shows you the address. "You need a ride?" He nods. "Well, there's the railroad, but maybe a taxi can get you there faster..."

Now he's the confused one. "Could you... speak... slower?"

"Do you understand Korean?" You ask. He gestures with his fingers almost pinched together, meaning a little. "What other languages do you speak?"

"Japanese."

You smile. "If I'd known that, I would've answered in it then." You say, switching tongues so smoothly Shota's brain nearly fails to comprehend what just happened. "Where are your parents? Mine are taking too long at the desk."

"I came alone. My mom might come in the next few days to help me with moving. And send me off.”

"You and your mom are moving here? What about your dad?"

"No, I'm moving here. Alone. Just me. For work." You eye him and the two suitcases at both of his sides. "You look my age. How do you already have a job?"

"Um... I'm a trainee." Your eyes widen as you begin to nod, shocked. "Really? Already?" He nods as your eyes observe him again. "Cool. That's- wow, okay..." You struggle to finish your sentence, cutting yourself off. "Right, you need to get around- okay. Um, you could follow me. I know how to get the one way passes. Do you have money?" He nods. You begin to walk away as he trails behind you, following you to some sort of kiosk.

Guiding him through purchasing a pass, your parents meet with you by the railway, scolding you for walking off without informing them first before stepping on and finding seats on the train. The boy sits down next to you in the window seat, staring out at the scenery for the first time. "You could have taken a taxi, but I felt like I should've stayed with you. Y'know, so I can tell you more about how to get around and stuff."

"Thank you, by the way. I appreciate this. I think I would've gotten run over without you." He jokes lightheartedly. "No problem. I suddenly felt nice for once, so you're lucky you caught me at a good time." You send him the same energy, both of you laughing as the train begins to move. "When you get off with us, you can ask for a taxi, they'll drive you to the exact address. I’m sure you already know that, though." You add, him nodding before leaning fully back against the chair.

"What's your name?"

The question catches him off guard, staring at your awaiting face, almost forgetting to answer.

"Shota."

The way he introduces himself to you makes you smile. "L/N. Nice to meet you. It's nice having someone to talk to at my age that speaks my mother tongue. Even if all we do is just sit here and pass out while waiting to arrive." Your matching humour is something that sticks out to Shota, one that he likes laughing along to. "It must be scary, flying here alone and having to figure things out on your own. Especially with how young you are. I hope you'll do okay when we part ways."

"I'm still here for now. What are you and your family doing here?" He changes the topic, not wanting to think about you having to leave him so soon. "My dad's side of the family is Korean, so we come here often to visit them. We're considering moving here, since their side is trying to convince me to sign up for a career in modelling. They always say I 'have the visuals', which I don't see, but it wouldn't hurt to try."

"Don't forget me when you're famous." Shota says.

"I could say the same for you, Mr. Trainee. You'll make it far, I bet. I'm looking forward to your debut already."

"And I'm looking forward to seeing you on the billboards." You both smile at each other, a brief moment of silence settling between you two. Shota feels a tap on the side of his arm, head turning to look at you. You hold your phone towards him, the keypad open and empty. "Is it okay if we exchange numbers? This may be the only time we ever see each other, and I like talking to you. And you can text me if you ever need anything. I respond very quickly." Your attempt at convincing him was not needed, as he took your phone out of your hands swiftly and punched his number in. You did the same for his phone when he handed it to you, creating your contact for him.

L/N (ㆁωㆁ)

You write your name in Kanji for him, hearing him huff after you hand back his phone. You couldn't see the soft smile that adorned his face after seeing the contact name you set for yourself, as your eyes were already beginning to shut and send you into a deep sleep. For the rest of the ride, Shota looks out the window and all the buildings they pass by. Feeling a light weight against his arm, his gaze moves to check.

Your head rests against his arm, Shota listening carefully and hearing soft, deep breaths come from you. At first, he nearly freezes, but forgets about it and relaxes, letting you doze against his arm, checking on you periodically until the train reaches your stop.

Your parents are the first to see you two in that position, and while Shota's first instict is to panic and apologize, the idea quickly goes away, a smile on your mom's face as she shakes you gently to wake you up. When you first open your eyes, you see your mom, then turn to see Shota staring at you, nearly leaning against the window. You slowly begin to put the pieces together, embarrassed when coming to the correct conclusion.

When you wave as his taxi departs from the train station, reality dawns upon him. He’s alone, and he’ll have to figure out more than just how to get around since you’re gone now. He didn’t want to have to depend on you and annoy you all the time, so he vowed to himself that he’d learn and teach himself, along with the help of his fellow group members.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

After Shota settled into the dorm and was toured around headquarters, the feeling of lying in bed suddenly felt more desirable than he thought it’d ever be. It’s been a few days since he parted ways with you, and he was hesitant to text you for some unknown reason.

He stared at your open empty message box for a while, spacing out until his phone starts buzzing in his hand. He reads your name on the screen, realizing you were calling him. He sits up, still in shock at the timing that he almost forgets to answer.

“Hello?” He greets, almost unsure. “Shota! How are you? Sorry I haven’t texted or anything, I’ve been having a lot of meetings with my family and stuff.” He’s frozen in place at the sound of your voice, so gleeful than how you first met. “No, it’s okay. I spent the last few days settling in so it’s fine.”

“Are you busy right now? Am I calling at a bad time?”

“No.”

“Are you okay? You sound nervous.”

He sits there for a moment, taking a deep breath before responding.

“I kinda miss you.” It’s embarrassing for him to admit, but he really does. “Oh.” He hears you mutter over the phone, probably unaware that he heard. “I miss you too, Shota. It sounds strange, but I do get worried about you sometimes. But the fact you picked up the phone is assurance that you’re okay, so…”

“It’s a bit hard when you aren’t around, y’know? Like, I don’t know, maybe it’s because you can speak Japanese and I’m not afraid of messing up in front of you because I can speak my home language, but it’s hard to talk to other people. Even my groupmates. I can understand what they’re saying, but I’m too nervous to mess up to even say anything to them.”

“Well, you can’t get better at speaking if you don’t speak at all. It’s okay to make mistakes, Shota. I made a lot when I was learning too. At least you try.”

“Kee– I mean, one of my group members is teaching me. He had to learn it too.”

“So you’re both learning together! That’s good, you both share learning experiences. I’d love to teach you, but it’s kinda hard over call.”

“But it’s possible?”

“Yeah.”

He ponders for a moment before coming up with an idea. “I have a laptop. We can video call when I’m not busy.”

“Really? Are you okay with it?”

“I’m the one that asked.”

“Do you think we can call… for non-lesson purposes? Y’know, just to talk?”

He huffs, and thought you don’t see it, you hear a smile in his tone. “Of course. I’d really like that.”

The door to their room opens, Jongseob entering. “Hi Soul.” Apparently his voice picks up on the microphone, because you ask, “Who’s that?”

“My roommate. One of them.”

“Who are you talking to?” Jongseob asks, looking over at Soul. “My friend.”

“Who’s your friend?”

“We met at the...” Soul knows the word, but is worried he’ll say it wrong.

“Airport.” You find the word for him, saying it into his ear.

“…Airport. She helped me.” He finishes his sentence with your help.

“She? Aren’t we not allowed to talk to girls as trainees?”

“We aren’t?”

“I think so? Maybe I’m thinking of something else; I keep in touch with my friends so I think it’s fine.”

“Are they all boys?”

“Mostly. Some girls.”

“I can’t talk to you anymore?” You ask, Shota almost forgetting he was on call with you. “We can. I think. We’ll do it in secret.” He hears you laugh on the other end. “Soul?” You say, overhearing the name his friend called him.

“My Korean name. I came up with it. With my roommates.”

“It’s cute! It suits you.” For some reason, he feels too flattered at your compliment. He overhears someone yelling in the background. “I need to go and help with dinner. I’ll talk to you soon! Bye!”

“Bye–“ He gets cut off by the sound of the call ending, letting himself fall back onto the bed, arms sprawled out. Jongseob looks over again at his roommate, who’s staring at the ceiling. “Are you okay?” He asks. Soul lazily responds with a thumbs up. “What happened?”

“Cute.” He mutters loud enough for his roommate to hear. “Cute?” Jongseob questions, puzzled. Soul points at himself, the cogs turning in his roommate’s head briefly before his eyes widen in realization. “She called you cute?!”

“My name.”

“Your name? She called your name cute? Soul?” He nods, Jongseob more shocked than he should’ve been. “Don’t fall in love yet, Soul, we haven’t debuted yet.” He jokes lightheartedly before he goes back to scrolling on his phone.

For a while, you’re the one to initiate calls. You always hesitate, knowing how busy he is, but you eventually learn that he’s off on Sundays and is usually off training well past 10 in the evening. If otherwise, he calls you first.

He enjoys talking to you a lot. He’s more comfortable speaking his home language in general, and the fact he has someone to talk to in it makes coming home from practice even more exciting.

His roommates would wonder why he rushes to his room so quickly the minute they step foot back in their dorm, but don’t question it. As long as he was able to talk to you, through call or text, he was able to stay sane.

While on FaceTime with him, the door to his room opens, as it usually does when you two call, this time a different man you haven’t seen before by the door. You eventually met Jongseob, the first guy who walked in on the two of you calling, and saw what he looked like, but this guy was definitely not him. He looked a little intimidating.

“Soul, do you want anything? We’re ordering delivery.” The man asks, Soul looking back at him. “Fries.”

“Just fries? Like usual?”

“I want… the same thing as you. Except large fries.��

“Okay, sure. Who’s that?” He seems to have noticed your face on Soul’s phone screen. “My friend. This is Keeho.” He introduces the man at the door to you, the name familiar. “He’s teaching you Korean?” The man gives a thumbs up, switching to a wave. “Hello, Soul’s friend!” He greets, his smile ridding all your previous opinions of him being intimidating.

“Hello! I’m just talking to Soul for a bit. How are you?” You reply, Keeho equally befuddled as Soul when he first met you, and how you switched tongues so effortlessly. “I’m doing well, thank you. How did you two meet?”

“Airport. I helped him get around for a bit.”

“Oh, really? That’s cool. I’ll be heading out now, sorry to interrupt.” Keeho waves at the camera again before shutting the door. Soul turns back to face you. “He looked scary.” You admit. Soul seems to agree with you, given the expression on his face. “That’s what I thought too! But he’s really nice and funny.”

“How many of your roommates know about me?”

“He’s the second one.”

“And how many roommates do you have?”

“Five. Plus me, so six.”

“Six?! And you share a room with how many people?”

“3 per bedroom. The whole place is actually quite roomy.”

“I don’t think I’d survive…”

“If you’re rooming with just girls, you’ll be fine. Boys, however…”

“Yeah, I get what you mean.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“You got a haircut!”

“You noticed.”

“Of course I noticed. It looks really good!”

“I got something else too.”

“What is it?”

Soul grabs something out of frame, eyes focusing on his fingers. “Keeho and I went out today. I found these rings and bought them.” He curls his hand into a fist, showing them off to the camera. It’s a variety of different skull rings, a few on his right hand and a few on his left. “Cool! Where’d you get them? I want some for myself.”

“I can just give you one.”

“Really? But you just bought them.”

“When we meet up sometime, you can pick one.”

“Are you sure?”

“If it helps remind you of me.”

Your face goes warm. “You’re so sweet, Shota.”

“Did you cut your hair?” He asks. You’re surprised he noticed, given how subtle the difference was. “It was just a trim. And they made it flowier or something.” His head moves closer to the camera. “Are you keeping it this short?” You shake your head. “Getting rid of split ends and stuff. It’ll grow back eventually.”

“It’s very pretty. It looks good on you.”

“Thank you…” You mutter, flustered for a reason you can’t make out. How noticeable could a subtle change be that it could evoke such words not meant to be anything more than meaningful?“I really want to see you.”

“You’re seeing me right now.” He jokes. “I know, but… in person. I feel kinda limited only being able to see you on my laptop or phone screen.”

“Me too. I haven’t debuted, so it’s kind of risky for me to be hanging out with a girl. Outside.”

“They don’t know we’ve been calling?”

“They know. But it’s more discreet this way because no one can see us.”

“When are you debuting?”

“I don’t know yet. And if I did, I don’t know if I’d be allowed to tell you.”

“I’m good at keeping secrets! I still remember some from 5th grade.”

“If you say so.”

“Oh, I just remembered I needed to tell you something.”

“What is it?”

A smile slowly grows on your face. “I’m moving here.” Shota’s face is equally as shocked. “Really?”

“I got signed with an agent and got a few bookings! They’re small, but they’re something.”

“L/N, that’s amazing! You’re– you’re gonna be famous! I’m gonna see your face in all the stores!” You laugh at his enthusiasm. “Hey, maybe when we’re both famous, we can hang out in public! Maybe we can collaborate.”

It was always moments like this, purity radiated off your interactions. You’d get excited over the thought of seeing each other in person, what you’d do when you finally meet up, and how long you’d hang out together (you two always insisted on a night at your place). What you’d talk about, the kinds of pictures you’d take, what kind of food you could eat.

After all, you two were still kids.

You celebrated his 16th birthday late into the night, on voice call after his in person celebration with his roommates. He wished you were there as he blew out the candles on his cake.

“Happy birthday, Shota.” You softly greet, knowing he’s on the verge of falling asleep as he laid in bed. “Thank you.” He mutters, voice muffled, his face buried in his blankets. “I wish I could be with you in person. I got you a gift.”

“Really? You didn’t have to…”

“I wanted to. I’ll give it to you when we finally meet up.”

“We always say we’re gonna meet up, but when? I don’t know if I can wait much longer.”

“It’s only a matter of your schedule. I’m free most of the time.”

“Maybe after I finally debut this year…” Shota’s eyes widen, realizing what he just said. “What? You’re debuting?”

“I didn’t mean to say that–“ You squeal softly over the phone in an attempt to not wreck his ears. “When were you going to tell me?!”

“Honestly, I forgot. I forget a lot of things.”

You stifle a laugh. “I’m so proud of you! All your hard work is finally paying off– maybe we really can see each other! When are you debuting?”

“Sometime later this year. It’s why I haven’t been picking up your calls, I’ve been really busy recording and stuff. Sorry.”

“Don’t be. You do what you gotta do, okay? Just call me whenever you aren’t busy. Or text. Or whatever, I’m okay with anything.”

Shota softly chuckles. “So what did you get me?”

“It’s a surprise. You’ll find out eventually.”

“I’ll be 17 by the time I get that gift…”

“Keep your head up, Shota, we’ll see each other soon enough. You sound tired. Get some rest. Goodnight.” He breathes slow and deep before replying. “Goodnight, L/N.” He ends the call, taking out his earbuds and putting them and his phone on the small, crowded bedside table.

“Was that L/N?” Jongseob asked groggily. Soul replied with a monotone ‘mmm’, meaning he was right. “Who’s L/N?” Theo asks from the far side of the room. “Soul’s friend. They call all the time.”

“You talk to her like she’s your girlfriend. How you want to see her all the time and stuff. It’s cute.” Theo mutters, Soul barely making out what he said. His face goes warm at the assumption. “We haven’t seen each other… in 2 years. We’ve only met once in person.”

“And training is holding you back from seeing her? That’s why you video call?” Jongseob puts two and two together, receiving the same monotone response from Soul. “We’re off tomorrow. You can see her then.”

“But we haven’t debuted yet.”

“So? Intak meets with his friends all the time.”

“They’re all guys.”

“Soul, you can’t exactly be deprived of meeting up with your friends. And what if she’s a girl? If you want to hang out with her, hang out with her.” Theo speaks up, voice clearer now that his head isn’t buried in his blankets. “This goes for you too, Jongseob. You guys are still kids. If you’re being forced to be an adult in the industry, at least try to have fun while you’re still young outside of work.”

Soul lays there for a moment. “What if she’s sleeping?” He asks aloud. “The fact she called you this late means she’s probably still awake at this time.” Jongseob says, convincing Soul to pick up his phone one last time for the night. He opens your contact in his messages, typing swiftly.

I’m off tomorrow. Can we meet up?

By the time he falls asleep, he receives a message from you.

Yes please (⌒▽⌒)

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“L/N? You’re seeing her today?” Keeho asks, making himself a bowl of cereal as Soul eats his own. Soul responds monotone with his mouth full, his leader sitting down with him. “Do you want me to go with you? I won’t stay the whole time, I’ll just drop you off with her then walk around myself, might just get some new clothes.”

‘You bought new clothes a week ago…’ Soul thinks.

“Are you gonna get her something? How long are you gonna be out for?” Soul shrugs his shoulders at Keeho’s question. The other bedroom door opens, Jiung emerging from the dark room with a loud yawn before closing the door. “Morning.” He greets, going for the same breakfast choice as the two boys sitting at the table.

“Does he know?” Keeho points at Jiung with his thumb. “Jiung and Intak don’t know.” The boy at the kitchen counter looks at them weirdly. “Me and Intak don’t know what?” He questions, suspicious of his two group-mates. “L/N.” Keeho answers.

“Who’s L/N?”

“He doesn’t know…!” Keeho whispers.

“Oh…” Jiung says after a brief moment of staring into space. “Isn’t that Soul’s girlfriend?”

Keeho nearly chokes on his cereal. “Girlfriend?!”

“No, she’s my friend!”

“Oh, my bad. You’re always smiling at your phone and you talk so lovey dovey in your room. The walls are quite thin.” Soul couldn’t figure out what was more embarrassing; the fact that the people in the other room could hear him talking to you or the fact two people thought he had a girlfriend. “We’re still trainees, Jiung, we can’t date. Besides, he’s only 16.”

“Just saying. Maybe after we debut, you can date–“

“Jiung, if you don’t stop talking, I’m going to cut your hair off in your sleep.” Keeho threatens. It seems to work, given that Jiung begins to eat his breakfast in silence. “I guess he does know.” Soul mutters, mostly to himself.

“So are you getting her anything?” Keeho asks, going back to his answered question. “Ring.” Soul shows off the accessories that decorated his fingers. “Really? I thought you said you’d never give those away. And that you’d end the world if you ever lost them…”

“I promised. And we can match.”

“Aww.” Jiung coos, the two boys at the table glaring at him. “What?”

Keeho turns back to Soul, taking their empty cereal bowls and stacking them on top of each other. “Go get changed, we’ll leave soon.” He says, going to put the dishes in the sick.

By the time Soul gets back to his room, Jongseob and Theo are awake, their lamps on. “Morning, Soul. How are you up so early?” Theo greets, Soul shrugging in response. They watch as their early bird roommate picks an outfit, throwing his clothes onto the bed. “Are you going somewhere?” Jongseob asks.

“I’m seeing L/N today.”

They both look at him, wide eyed and now fully awake. “Really?!”

“It was your idea.” He says, referring to both of them. “When are you leaving?” Theo asks, eyes still on Soul. “Soon. Keeho is walking with me. Then we’ll be on our own.”

“So it’s like a date?” Jongseob nudges Theo hard in the side. “Does everyone think that?” Soul groans, his roommates heading for the door.“Everyone that knows.” Jongseob smirks before he shuts the door, leaving Soul alone with his thoughts in the bedroom.

On the walk there, Soul plays with his fingers, fiddles with his rings, almost too nervous to even function. Keeho seems to notice, giving him a pat on the back. “There’s nothing to worry about, Soul. You’ve seen each other, you know each other. You’ve been looking forward to this for so long, what’s wrong?”

“It’s… different in person. I’m excited, but I’m scared I’ll…” Soul looks for the word, Keeho noticing him struggling to finish his sentence. “Embarrass yourself?” Soul nods. “You’ve seen all sides of each other, Soul. I hear you laugh at like… 11 in the evening. I think I heard you fall off your bed once.”

“She’s seen that side of you. I’m sure you’ve seen that side of her, too. You’ll be okay.” Keeho’s words make up the rest of the walk, as Soul stops in his path as his eyes land on you, sitting on a park bench perfectly shaded by a tree. He stands there, simply admiring you, and how he’s so happy he’s seeing you not on his phone screen.

He pulls out his phone, opening your contact and sending you a text.

Look to your right 👀

You do exactly that, and though you’re far away, he sees such a bright glow in your eyes as you get up and run over to him, jumping onto him for a hug. Soul is surprised at your sudden gesture, but happily accepts, holding you tight and even spinning you around.

“Shota! I’m so glad you–“ You notice Keeho out of the corner of your eye, simply smiling at the two of you. “Oh, hi Keeho...” You greet awkwardly, embarrassed that he saw the whole thing. “Nice to meet you, L/N. How long are you gonna be out for?”

“Until Soul wants to go home. A few hours, maybe.”

“Make sure you two stick together, okay? Otherwise all of us are gonna get in trouble in one way or another.” Keeho says lightheartedly before walking off. You look back at Soul, who’s staring at you with the brightest sparkle in his eyes. “You look even better in person.” You say, brushing his hair out of the way.

“Are you saying I don’t look good when we call?”

“I’m saying you look good no matter what.”

“Can I say the same for you?�� He asks, as if you’re going to say no. “I actually want to show you something. And I have lots to tell you.” You take his hand without a second thought, pulling him with you. He’s caught off guard with your sudden gesture, but doesn’t protest in any way. Really, he enjoys it.

“Is this okay with you? Sorry, I forgot to ask.” Shota nods with a smile, and that’s all the assurance you need to keep your hold on his hand to guide him. “I hope we can meet like this again sometime. All the time.”

“Hey, I’m here now. Worry about that later.”

“You’re right. Come on!” You tug on his hand as you begin to lightly jog across the street, slowing down when you get nearby. “Okay, close your eyes.” He’s confused at first, but obliges. You guide him to an outside display of a clothing store. “You can open them now.”

Shota uncovers his eyes, seeing your face on display as a model for said store. “It’s you!” He exclaims as you nod off to the side. His gaze switches from you to the photo and back, and he finds himself staring at it for almost too long.

“I want a picture with it.” You laugh, taking his phone from him and snapping a few photos, switching to silly faces for the camera. “Do you like it?”

“I love it. You look so pretty. Beautiful.” Your face goes warm as you stare at him, and he stares at the photo. “You look really good.” He smiles, and your heart starts racing like never before. “Shota…” You mutter into his sleeve, holding onto his hand again. “What?”

“Let’s go. You can see my face some place else.”

“Can I get a photo with them too?”

You roll your eyes, unable to hold in your laugh. “Sure. You can take as many photos as you want.”

The day is full of you running around, taking photos, sharing food and drinks. And for almost all of it, Shota’s hand is in yours, and his grip never loosens. He never wants to let go.

Sitting at an outdoor table of a small café, you hand Shota a gift bag. “What’s this?” He asks. “Happy belated birthday, Shota.” At the sound of that, he looks through the bag, taking out a small potato plush. “Cute…!” He mutters, squeezing it in his hands. “I have one of my own. It came in a set, so I gave this one to you.”

“I love it.” He smiles, going through the bag again. There’s something at the bottom, which he grabs and pulls out. It’s a bracelet, similar to the one you were wearing at the moment. “I wanted to give you something that reminded you of me. If you ever get lonely. Sounds cheesy, but–“

“I’m never taking this off.” His dramatic reply cuts off your sentence as you help him tighten it on his wrist. “I want to give you something too.” You tilt your head. “But it was just your birthday. Shouldn’t you be the one receiving gifts right now?”

“Well, as someone once said, I want to give you something that reminds you of me.” Shota holds out his hands, showing off his rings. “Pick one.”

At first, you’re shocked. “Really?” He nods, watching as your eyes scan over his fingers. “This one.” You point. He takes it off and puts it on for you, and it somehow fits just fine. “I feel so cool now! Thank you.”

On the way back to your place, Shota holds onto your hand again, to the point where if he were to let go, you’d feel like you forgot a piece of yourself. “Are you walking back alone?” You ask, looking up at the sky, which painted a pinkish sunset above. “Keeho is gonna meet me here after you go inside.”

“I just don’t want you walking by yourself. It’s a bit scary.”

“I know. But everything is under control, so I’ll be okay.”

When you reach your home, you turn to look at your friend. “Today was fun. I wanna hang out with you like this again.”

“So do I. But I’m… y’know, I’m busy. With a lot.”

“I know you are. I’ll be waiting for you, Shota. I’m always ready.”

“Haku.”

“Huh?”

“My name. My name is Haku.”

“Haku Shota?” You clarify. He nods. “You have such a pretty name.”

“You’re pretty.”

Oops.

He didn’t mean to say that out loud. While he was embarrassed, your heart was racing. Your face was warm, and it matched the sky.

“You’re pretty, Haku. You are… very handsome.”

You understand how he feels now, attempting to return the compliment. “Am I weird for saying that? Because… I really do mean it. I’m just awkward.” You explain. “Not at all. Have I been weird? Calling you pretty…?”

“No! No– you’re, you’re okay. I liked it– I mean, um…” You stutter over your words, cursing at yourself for revealing too much. Haku laughs. “I’ll call you that more if you like it so much.”

“If you want to kill me, go ahead.”

“I thought you said you liked it.”

“I’ll die of a heart attack. I’ll die happy.”

“Soul!” Someone calls. It’s Keeho, waving at him from afar. “Thanks for today. I’m… I really liked spending time with you.” Soul responds with a long, tight hug, the feeling of being in his arms comforting. “I don’t wanna let go.” Soul mutters into your shoulder. “You’re gonna have to at some point.”

“What if I don’t?”

“Shota–“

“I’ll just stay with you so then we can hang out all the time.”

“You know you can’t do that.” You hear him sigh and reluctantly pull away. “Bye, L/N.”

“Y/N.”

“Hm?”

“It’s Y/N.”

He huffs with a smile. “Bye, Y/N.” He waves as you walk off, walking towards and with Keeho once he sees you let inside your house. “How was it?”

“Really fun. I’m already excited for another one.” Keeho looks at Soul’s hands, noticing one of his fingers bare, a bag in his hand, and his wrist adorned with a new bracelet. He really gave you one of his rings. And you gave him something too.

Though this was your first hang out in a few years, Keeho sensed something unbeknownst to Soul that was bound to bloom at some point. He just didn’t know when.

When they got back to the dorm, Soul went straight to his room and changed, lying down on the bed with your contact open. He changed your name.

L/N Y/N (ㆁωㆁ)

And sent you one last text for the night.

You have a very pretty name (*´꒳`*)

Make that two.

Goodnight (_ _).｡o○

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You find it odd that it took you two years to find out each other’s first names, but life goes on the way it always does.

You also found it odd that you enjoyed talking to Shota so much. You’ve always enjoyed talking to him, you just enjoy it a lot more now. Maybe too much.

You were the first person he texted when he debuted. You were also the first person to see any of his performance videos. One thing stayed consistent throughout:

He was wearing your bracelet.

Sometimes it would be hidden under his sleeve, the strings to tighten it peeking out just a little bit. He really meant it when he said he would never take it off, even if that meant getting into trouble with the stylists.

You were peaking in your career as well. You’d gotten a lot more busy with bookings and shows despite being so young. But despite your schedules, you always found time to talk to each other, like always.

And you even found time to hang out in person a lot more than before.

You started wearing masks in public. Sometimes you got recognized, and so did Shota. Nothing too drastic to the point where paparazzi started following you and taking pictures from the bushes. Shota was still careful, though. A scandal too soon into their debut could wreck him and his group’s career.

As careful as he was, Shota still held onto your hand in public. He was much more nervous now that more people knew who he was, and he always found himself latching onto you. The language barrier slowly began to shrink for him, his Korean improving, but he had a hard time talking to strangers. To his group, he was fine.

He couldn’t stop the uneasy feeling in his stomach the closer they got to the counter. Why was he so nervous? He felt like he couldn’t talk to anyone at all. “Could I get a 2 with onion rings?” You ask, the cashier at the till looking at Shota next. He was frozen in place, staring at her, suddenly squeezing your hand with a tight grip. “And a 5. Large fries.” You order for him, paying and taking the receipt and cups.

Shota sits down at a table by the window, ashamed and embarrassed, guilt overwhelming him. It wasn’t such a big deal, yet he felt like a failure for not being able to do something so simple. “Do you want to share?” He doesn’t respond, staring and spacing out at the table mindlessly.

You sit in the chair across from him, looking around to see if anyone is watching. You place your hand on top of his, rings colliding with each other, which brings him back to reality. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?” You ask with such genuineness that he feels guilty for even worrying over such a trivial thing.

“Nothing, it’s… it’s stupid. So stupid.”

“I can’t know how stupid it is if you don’t tell me what’s bothering you.”

Shota looks up at you with puppy eyes, breaking eye contact once he begins to speak. “I… um, I froze when we were ordering. You do it for me all the time and I wanted to do it for myself this time but I just couldn’t… talk. I couldn’t speak, I’ve been getting better at talking but I’m still scared to even order my own food– this is so dumb.” He rests his head on the table, messy black hair hiding his face.

Your hand moves from his hand to his head, fingers running through his hair as you caress him. “Don’t beat yourself up about it, Shota. I’m glad you’re trying, you’re having confidence in yourself. It’s good to take it slow sometimes. I’m always here for you, Keeho is always there for you, your group is there for you! There’s always next time, okay? It may seem like a small step to others, but all that matters is how much it means to you. We’re always here for you. No matter if it’s me or anyone from your group.”

When he lifts his head up, your hand naturally moves from his hair down to his face, your thumb resting on his cheek. “Thank you.” The sparkle in his eyes comes back, as he stares at you for a long time, yet you don’t seem to mind and reciprocate it. Noticing how you two probably look to bystanders, you pull your hand away, face warmer than it should be.

“Um, do you just wanna share? I forgot to ask for medium instead of large.” You refer to the cups in your hand, and he nods, watching as you stumble while getting up from the chair and over to the drink fountain. The cup presses against the trigger, watching as the soda fills the cup to the brim.

As you walk back and grab your order, you can’t help but overthink. Why did you do that? It looked so intimate, and if people knew who you were, if people knew who he was… you’d both get in trouble. Shota would get in trouble because of you. You knew him too well to know that he’d take the blame and risk getting kicked out not even a year into their debut.

When you bring the tray to the table, you feel his eyes on you, and your heart had no reason to be beating so fast in the moment. “Are you okay? You look worried.” This time, Shota asks you. Your head perks up at his voice, snapping you out of it. “I’m okay. Let’s just eat.”

Everything goes back to normal in your silly, lighthearted fashion. You’d steal fries off his side, he’d drink from your straw, and you two would just mess around as you always would. No one came up to either of you with your masks off, so you two continued to be yourselves in the moment, with no one staring.

You find beauty in his personality. How you get to see him like this since you two are so comfortable with each other. Is he like this at his dorm? Probably. But is he ever this excited? Maybe not. You get to see him at full energy, unhinged and expressive, a side that the public might not see in him. And you felt so incredibly lucky.

Shota liked the way you stared at him, and the way a smile would creep up on your face. The way you’d hit a table over and over again or clap your hands when you found something funny. The way you’d pick up on his subtle hints and gestures and how you’d always found a way to make him feel better, the way you’d instantly recognize what’s wrong. You were patient with him, and that’s all he’s ever wanted.

He saw Keeho like an older brother; he acted the same way you did, but there was something different about the way you approached things. The way you weren’t afraid to be so physical with him, and how he wouldn’t recoil from your touch. He loved your hugs, and the way you’d bury yourself in him whenever you did.

Soul finds himself thinking of you at the dorms. He always thinks of you, but this was thinking of you at an extreme. You were on his mind 24/7. He’d think of how much fun certain practices would be if you were there. How you’d criticize him for putting the seasoning packets after putting the ramen in the bowl. Sometimes he’d imagine getting surprised by you. What would happen if you walked through the door right now?

You two saw each other’s quirks and you loved them. You saw sides of each other that the public couldn’t, and it made you both feel special. When you felt your heart racing when you thought of him, you couldn’t help but feel full of dread.

When he saw your photos or clips of your shows, he hated that his face went warm when you came on screen. That he was so hyper focused on you and nothing else.

You were smart. Emotionally and academically. You knew what was happening, but didn’t want to accept it. Really, it was process of elimination.

You started to have feelings for your best friend.

And you hated it. You hated it because him being in the industry pretty much means that he can’t date at all. You’d have to live with feelings that would never be reciprocated, and sometimes it hurt whenever you saw his face, especially when he was looking so damn good.

So you always stayed in denial of your feelings. You gaslighted, convinced, manipulated yourself to get over it, but nothing worked. You couldn’t help that your best friend was just that talented and attractive that when he texts you, you feel butterflies in your stomach and a smile grows onto your face.

Soul, however, was much more unaware of it. He never liked anyone. He was left alone with his thoughts for majority of his childhood, and had female friends but no romantic attraction to anyone.

When he finds himself pondering at the kitchen table, spacing out as he tries to figure out his feelings, his older brother figure, Keeho, sits down with him, after noticing Soul leaving the last bit of food in his bowl and just staring blankly. “You okay?” His voice snaps Soul out of it as he nods.

Intak sits down in the other seat with his own bowl, unintentionally now being a part of the conversation. “Something’s on your mind. You can tell me, I won’t judge.” Soul knows Keeho won’t judge. Intak, however…

Soul’s gaze moves from Keeho to Intak. “Intak won’t care. What’s bothering you?”

“What are we talking about?” Intak asks, clueless.

“L/N.”

“What’s up with L/N? Didn’t you just see her last weekend?”

“Is L/N that girl Soul’s friends with? I saw her advertising a brand at a department store the other day.” Intak overhears, pitching into the conversation. “Yeah, that’s her.”

“What’s wrong? Did she insult you or something?”

The more Soul tries to think about it with the words in his head, his heart beats faster and faster that he brings his hand to his chest, feeling the rapid, strong pulse against his palm. How did you manage to make him feel like this? Like he was speechless?

Keeho seemed to notice something, because he moved Soul’s hand and put his own on his chest, feeling how fast it was beating and how powerful it was. “Your face is all red. Are you having a fever?” Intak asks, totally opposite to what Keeho is thinking.

“Oh my god.” He starts, acting overdramatic. “You like her.” When Keeho says it, it makes Soul cringe, and he hates that he came to the same conclusion. “Soul likes who?” Intak is still clueless about the whole situation, probably tired out from practice that day.

“L/N, you idiot, get your head out of the clouds.”

“I like her. A lot.”

“You like her as more than a friend?” Keeho clarifies, Soul nodding. He can see the conflict in his leader’s eyes, a sense of understanding yet a tinge of guilt. “I know we can’t… date. I really want to. She’s the first person who’s ever understood me… ever since I got here.”

His leader sighs. “I think you should tell her. But… be careful. You’re putting a lot of things at risk here.”

“I know I am.”

“Soul’s a pretty quiet person. He should be okay. I mean, as long as none of us ramble about it, we should be fine.” Keeho nods along, his face content. On the inside however, he knows damn well all of them ramble way too much.

And they could ramble about you and Soul.

“Should I text her?”

“Tell her in person. If you really like her, and you really do mean it, you need to tell her the next time you two meet up.”

“But what if I can’t say it?” Keeho is well aware of Soul’s problem with freezing up when talking to others, yet this was something bound to happen, even with you. “She’s patient. She’ll wait as long as she needs to for you to say it. You’ll be okay, Soul. I’m pretty sure she likes you back.”

“She does?”

Keeho scoffs. “Have you seen the way she is around you? Sometimes she stutters over her words when you’re around, she’s always waiting for you, she lets you take her food… there’s a whole list that goes on for a while.”

Soul’s gut feeling was right. He did have a crush on you. A really big one that would only grow if he didn’t do something about it quick.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He arranged to hang out with you the following week. His heart would not stop beating as if it was about to soar right out of his chest. He swore that if you put your thumb on the right spot on his wrist, you’d feel how nervous he was getting as time passed, and he did not want that happening soon enough.

You noticed something else. He seemed a lot more tense, spaced out, and hesitant. To be honest, you were almost the same. You hesitated to hold his hand like you usually did when you walked with him, worried someone would recognize either of you and see what was happening.

Anything simple you’d over-romanticize. He’d block you from the wind. He’d freak out and any display of you and take a picture of it, smiling as he checked them one last time for any retakes. How he’d play with your hand when you two sat together. When you’d share your food.

Everything you did normally was now something you saw as something beyond your friendship. You wanted it to be that way, you really did, but knowing Soul, as clueless as he is, he probably didn’t mean anything at all behind his actions. Everything has just been so normalized between the two of you.

Your heart raced as fast as his. One could say that if you compared both of your pulses, they would sync up, or be extremely close in heart rate. His face had the slightest tinge of pink that you noticed under certain lighting— you didn’t get to look at it long since he didn’t want to call you out for staring.

“I really like your hair colors. They’ve all looked really good on you.” You say, Soul surprised at the sudden compliment. “I’ve only dyed it once or twice…”

“And it looks good. Even your hairstyles! The braids are so cute! If it gets long enough, I should give you pigtails.”

“Long enough that hopefully I don’t get scheduled for a haircut.”

“I’d cry, honestly.”

Shota stops in his tracks in front of your place, the sudden tug on your hand holding you back. “I need to tell you something. It’s been… stuck in my head for a while.” He admits, kicking away a stone at his feet. “What is it?” The look you give him almost makes him back out, but he knew keeping it in for longer would only eat at him. And it wouldn’t be a while until he’d see you again.

“Um, I–“

“Soul!”

Shota turns around at the sound of the voice, Keeho standing at a distance and waving at him. He turns back to face you, taking a deep breath.

“L/N…”

“I like you.”

He notices the shock in your expression, your eyes widening slightly and jaw slightly hanging open.

“I like you a lot.” He continues.

Shota doesn’t know what to make of your blank stare at him, since you do so for longer than you should’ve. “I-I know it’s hard for us to do any relationship related stuff because of our careers. Um, I get if you’re worried about all of this and dating in general but…”

“Shota.” You cut him off, his eyes landing on you. You take both of his hands, thumbs brushing over the metal of his rings. “I want to go out with you.” You say so forwardly that he almost becomes the shocked one. “I really like you. I really do. I… I don’t want your career to be ruined because of me. You worked your ass off for this and God knows how much we’ve been separated because of it.”

You squeeze his hands, looking at how they intertwine. Shota speaks up. “Is it crazy that I like you so much?”

“How much?”

“That I feel like you’re the only one who’ll ever understand me? That you’re the only one I’ve ever had actual genuine feelings for? Am I too young to be thinking about these kinds of things?”

“I ask myself the same questions. Every. Single. Day.”

He giggles, feeling your head lean against him. You look up, chin resting against him with a light in your eyes he hadn’t seen before. “I don’t think you’re crazy. I think we’re two teenagers stupidly in love.”

“Soul, hurry up!” Keeho calls.

You can practically hear him roll his eyes the way he scoffs, making you giggle. “Go out with me.” He asks, more of a statement than a request. His chin rested atop your head, his hand rubbing your back with reassurance. “M’kay.” You agree with a smile, voice muffled.

“We’ll keep it a secret.”

“Even from the guys?”

“I’ll do my best.”

“Your dad is calling you.” He laughs at your joke, noticing you lost in thought. You pull away a bit, looking at the ground for a moment. In one swift movement, you tiptoe and peck his cheek. “Bye!” You briefly bid, briskly walking away. Shota raises his hand to where you kissed him, almost forgetting in his moment of bliss that Keeho had already called him twice.

The walk back is mostly in silence, Soul doing his best to stop his giddy little smile on his face from growing any more. Keeho didn’t look back at him once.

The sun is fully set by the time they arrive back at the dorms, Keeho entering with an extravagant greeting. “We’re baaack!” He gleefully exclaims. Shuffling can be heard from a distance as the boys begin to take off their shoes. “Soul, how was the–“ Theo starts, being cut off after seeing something on Soul’s face.

When he gets up from kneeling down, Theo notices a light pink mark on Soul’s face, and it for sure was not his blush. “You– She–“

“What’s happening–“ Jiung is equally as shocked as Soul walks into the main space. “Oh my god.” He mutters, hand going to cover his dropped jaw. “She kissed you!” Theo exclaims. Keeho immediately comes running over, grasping Soul’s face and turning it to find the mark. He gasped louder than he should’ve when he found it.

“Just on the cheek.” Soul felt like he had to specify, but the three boys continued to jump around and freak out over the mark. “Cute! Ugh– we need to meet her sometime!” Jiung gushes.

“She just kissed me today and you guys already want to meet her in person?”

They all nod.

“I think you guys would scare her. It’s a bit cramped in here… and we aren’t even allowed to have girls here.”

“Maybe we’ll run into her during a photoshoot! She’s getting pretty famous nowadays.” Jiung adds. “I’ve already met her so many times, just saying. She’s cool.” Keeho bragged before walking into his room.

Intak enters the living space, wondering why Theo and Jiung are crowded around Soul. Keeho goes back out to join them with his empty bottle of water, originally with the task of refilling it. Soul feels a buzz in his pocket, taking it out to see your name on his phone screen.

“She’s calling you!” Jiung gasps, Theo shushing him right after. Soul swipes right to accept the call. “Put her on speaker!” Intak whisper yells, Soul holding out his phone for his group members to huddle around it.

Jongseob comes out of his room, joining the boys even though he had no idea what exactly was going on. “Hello?” Soul greets. “Hi Shota!”

“I thought we just saw each other 20 minutes ago. Do you miss me already?” He jokes, attempting not to stutter over his words. “Oh, we’re speaking in Korean now! I see how it is.” He can hear your sarcasm over the phone, a smile growing on his lips. “What’s up? Did you forget something?”

“My parents kinda caught us outside. When I…”

“Oh. Right.”

“They want you to come over.”

“So soon?” Intak says a little too loud.

“Who was that?”

“No one– just a show in the background.”

“Oh. Well, you’ve met them before. On calls and stuff, they know who you are. You know them, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Because they saw… us… they want to meet you. I told them about how busy you were and your schedule and that it wouldn’t be for a while until you were free again–“

“Y/N.” He cuts you off for a second. “I’ll let you know when I’m free.”

“Really?”

“I want them to know I’m a good person. That I am doing my best for you.” His groupmates gush audibly, and it definitely picks up on the microphone. “You’re going to make me miss you a whole lot more if you keep talking like that.” Soul chuckles. “They’re listening, aren’t they?”

“What?”

“Your group. That did not sound like a TV show in the background.”

They all look at each other, surprised. “Um… maybe?”

“Agh– they heard all of that?! So embarrassing…”

“They wanna meet you too. My group.”

“I thought girls weren’t allowed in your dorms.”

“Outside of the dorms. Possibly in a work environment?”

“That could work! I’m already looking forward to it.”

“They’re all weird.” Soul feels everyone’s eyes on him. “A bit. Just saying.” He hears you giggle on the other end.

“Shota?”

“Mhm?”

“I love you.”

It goes dead silent for a moment, before all the boys erupt into loud cheering and hollering, Soul having to cover his ear to hear you. “Is it too soon for me to say that?” You ask.

“Did you mean it?” He answers with another question, silence on your end for a second.

“I did.”

“Then no. If anything, I think you’re 3 years too late.”

“Have you been waiting that long for me to say it?”

“Mmm, maybe just half a year.”

“Figured.”

“Y/N?” He switches back to Japanese.

“Yes?”

“I love you too.”

Though in another language, the boys can understand the small phrase, their montage of cheers going on for longer than it should have.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

As both of you had begun to become more globally renowned, so did your relationship with each other. At first, it was viewed as the two of you being very close friends. After certain interactions and nitpickings, people began to question the nature and status of your relationship.

People noticed the ring on your finger and how it looked exactly like the ones on Soul’s. When the string to tighten his bracelet was visible from under his sleeves, some made connections to learn that it looked like yours. Neither of you took it off, even during work events.

If it couldn’t be on your wrist, you managed to use your bracelet as an anklet. It was more subtle, but you ended up having to send pictures to Shota to show proof you kept it on.

Strings were pulled. Your company met with his, and despite their strict dating laws and restrictions, they managed to work around them. You just hoped they weren’t bribed in any way.

You did end up visiting their dorm a few times after the workarounds, and Shota was always there at the door to be the first person to greet you. His physical touch became more than just holding your hand. He clung onto you; he loved hugs, he loved hugging you.

You loved his hair, playing with it and tying it up into different hairstyles. Pigtails, braids, the occasional half up ponytail. You were always fascinated at the fact every single colour looked so good on him.

The rest of the boys had to get used to your presence. Given you didn’t visit often since Soul would rather visit you, sometimes the sight of you seated with Soul on their couch was a shocker to them. Keeho got used to it the quickest.

From your perspective, you were overall cautious but at the same time didn’t care if any news of the two of you happened to get out. It would be shocking from one end, but it would follow with claims saying that it was bound to happen sometime. Considering how young you were, sometimes you had your doubts. Most of the time you forgot about those doubts.

As for someone like Shota, with his growing popularity and presence in the K-pop industry, he was worried one little leak would cause him to get kicked out of his company. Until paparazzi footage of the two of you, his hands wrapped around your waist to meet in the front as you waited at a bus stop, was posted on a website.

You both panicked. You apologized, he apologized; it was a lot of back and forth. All that came from netizens was the mutual discussion of the chance that you two might be in a relationship. The girl on billboards across Korea going out with a rising star in K-pop? Both of them soon to be international? It was unexpected.

The public was pleasantly surprised. It was a match they hadn’t expected, so much so they decided to try and guess how you two met and how your relationship started. Though you never went deeper than cute photos and interactions that just had to happen in the public eye.

Soul was asked the question a few times.

“Is Y/N a close friend of yours?”

“What’s your relationship with the model?”

The members would either glare at the interviewer or look at Soul worried. He’d always respond with:

“She’s my girlfriend.”

Which pretty much revealed the terms you two were on to every person on the internet.

The boys always took pictures and videos of the two of you as well, if you were ever to end up working together somehow. If you came to the dorm, or if they ran into you two in public. You’re certain Intak and Theo have way too many photos of him falling asleep on you or vice versa.

Soul scrolls on his phone, noticing a few posts of the two of you as he goes deeper down the rabbit hole. As he goes to rewatch his dance practice of the day, he gets a text from you.

Shota

Haku

Haku Shota

Hi （╹◡╹）

I know this is gonna sound like really stupid and crazy and weird

What is it?

Is it okay if I stay at your dorm tonight

Soul looks up from his phone and the condition his shared room is in. It’s decently clean, at least his area is. Theo and Jongseob’s area is debatable.

It’s okay if not! I was just wondering

You can

Just let me ask the guys first

It’s really messy in here

He puts in his phone in his pocket before he’s able to check your next text, reluctantly getting out of bed to go and ask. He opens the door, at first sticking his head out, but then fully shuffling through the door.

“Hey Soul. I thought you were sleeping?” Keeho says, going to sit on the couch. “I need to ask you guys something.”

“What is it?” Intak adds.

“Y/N wants to come over.”

“This late?” Sometimes it surprises him how dense Intak could be sometimes. “She wants to stay over. Sleep.”

The boys all look up and around at the area, noticing the slight mess. Despite you seeing the area in such conditions most of the time when you came over, they suddenly felt obligated to do something rather than have you sleep in an environment with said mess.

“We’ll clean up. Tell her we said yes. Is everything okay?” Keeho said, getting up from the couch.

“We?”

“Get up, Jiung, and let the girl feel welcome.”

“Should I help?”

“Maybe clean our room.” Theo pats Soul on the shoulder, letting him walk back into said room.

Shota???

Are you there?

Pls respond

Sorry

I asked they said yes

I’m already on my way

We’ll talk more when I get there

I’ll text you

He can hear shuffling and commanding outside his room as he tosses the dirty laundry into their basket in the corner of the room, fixing his nightstand and somewhat making his bed since he was gonna lie down in it immediately afterwards.

By the time he gets a text, the room is mostly clean and tidy, prompting him to go and open the door for you. Your eyes meet with his, though they look dull and tired, more than they would be after a day of shoots.

“Hey.” You hide your gaze with the top of your hood. “Hi. Are you okay?”

“Let’s talk about it in your room. Is this a bad time?”

“Not at all. Come in.”

You nearly stumble over your own feet going to take your shoes off, Soul noticing there’s something more going on and it’s not just that you’re exhausted.

Not wanting to be rude, you briefly greet the rest of the boys before swiftly going into Soul’s shared room, Jongseob lying on his bed on his phone and simply acknowledging you when you enter the room, dropping your bag on the floor and plopping yourself on Soul’s bed. He sits next to you, your face covered by your hood.

He gently takes it off in case you’d stop him at the motion, seeing those dull eyes of yours, a bit pink and swollen. “What’s wrong? Is everything alright?” He softly asks, holding your hands in the same manner as his voice. “I’m having a few problems at home. Nothing with my parents. Extended family.”

“What happened?”

“My parents are having some maintenance and small renovations done on our house, so we’re staying in an extra room at my grandma’s for a little bit. My aunt lives in the other room.”

You inhale, trying to grasp onto your words.

“Um, my aunt is being,” you start, “being a real bitch. I know I can’t say that and it’s rude to even think so but God knows everyone in that room was pissed at her. She insulted my mom and her decision to move here and put me through modelling at such a young age.”

“She called me a wannabe, and that I wasn’t gonna get anywhere in life just posing for the camera. Called me a slut for allowing to be in shoots where I show a lot of skin when really it’s usually just a tank top and a skirt.”

“She said she felt bad for whoever I was dating that they had to be with a girl who loves showing herself off to the general public. Said I was practically naked if I showed too much skin.”

“So I don’t feel safe or comfortable in that house right now, and my parents were nice enough to let me stay someplace else. They agreed when I told them about you.”

Soul sat there, a silent rage burning through his veins. You had a completely valid reason to address her with such vulgarity. He couldn’t offer any advice in the moment, all that he could do was hug you.

“No wonder she still lives with your grandma.” He mutters into your shoulder, your hand hitting his back hard as you chuckle. “You can’t say that, Shota!”

“Who’s stopping me? I know you want to say it too.”

“Shota…”

“Fine. Only because you don’t want me to. Still, I’m sorry you had to go through all that. Stay as long as you need to.” Soul’s eyes meet with Jongseob’s, their stares translating into sentences.

‘As long as she needs to?’

‘Just let her. Please.’

‘Don’t ask me, ask Keeho.’

Shota rolls his eyes at his roommate, attention back on you. “I’m gonna go change now.” You say, pulling away. “Where are you gonna sleep?”

“Um, I was thinking we could share your bed. But I can always take the couch if you don’t want to–“

“Share. Yeah– yeah, we can share.”

You smile, kissing his forehead before you leave the room. Jongseob’s eyes are on Soul the minute the door shuts. “What did she say?” He meant to ask: ‘What did she say to make her kiss you in front of me?’

“She wants to share my bed.”

“You look really nervous.”

“I’m not nervous, just surprised. And I’ve… obviously never shared it before.”

“Just sleep normally, Soul. What’s so hard about that?”

“Do I snore?”

“You don’t. Theo does. Maybe get her some earplugs.”

“I don’t have any.” His roommate shrugs his shoulders.

“Jongseob…”

“Fine.” He tosses Soul a clean, unopened pair of foam earplugs. “Are you actually that nervous?”

Soul’s ashamed to admit it. “We’re close, but we haven’t been this close before. Not at all. I have no idea if I kick in my sleep– what if I kick her?”

“You kick like once or twice but not every other second. Besides, if L/N says she’s in love with you, she’s gotta be in love with everything about you. Including your sleeping habits. She’d love you regardless of what you do in your sleep.”

You come back in sweats and a loose shirt, going to lay on the bed while Shota sat on the edge. You place your hand on top of his, prompting him to turn around and look at you. “Are you that tired?”

“Korean all of a sudden?”

“I’m getting better, aren’t I?”

“By the day, Shota.”

“To answer your question, since I was crying for 10 minutes at home, yes, I’m tired. Are you gonna just gonna sit there or are you gonna get some rest?” Soul simply responds moving you over on the bed so he can sleep on the side closest to the wall. You turn to face him, all flushed and doe eyed. “Am I too close?” Your head rests against his chest and atop his arm, probably the definition of close.

“No.”

“I can always move if–“

“Just stay here. You’ve had a rough day.”

His other arm wraps around you, his hand on your back and pushing you closer to him. “Do you think we’re too young to be this in love?” You feel his head move. “What do you mean?”

“That we aren’t old enough to make bigger decisions for ourselves? This… this is a big thing. People say that we’re really young to already be dating, and I always shrug it off, but it’s bothering me. What if they’re right?”

“Are you doubting us?”

“I’m not, I’m really not! People are just overlooking what’s going on between us and they’re making assumptions and–“

“This relationship is only between us and no one else. We don’t need to worry about what others think. We only need to worry about each other.”

“You’re getting good at switching languages smoothly.” You say, trying to sneak a bit of humor in there. “I learn from the best.” His hand once on your back now moved to your head, stroking it smoothly. “I’m really grateful for you, actually. I hope you know that.” His words melt your heart as they always do, but somehow you find them more meaningful.

“When you first helped me here. When you offered to keep in touch and look where that brought us. When you don’t get bothered every time I ask you how to say something in Korean. And you still like being with me even though sometimes I can be a bit…”

“Bothersome?”

“I was thinking annoying, but what you said sounds nicer.”

“Shota, I never thought of you as annoying. You’re teaching yourself with the help of your group getting around and the culture and its differences.”

“How did you get used to it so quickly?”

“I didn’t. I’ve been here so many times to visit but living here? Oh, it was a culture shock to me.”

“So I’m really not alone in this?”

“You were never alone, Haku.”

You called him by his first name.

Your eyes meet at your mention of it, Shota looking at you with such a pure, joy filled gaze that was silent behind his irises. It was moments like this where you got to admire his beauty, how pretty he was, his features and how they worked so well together.

You’re drawn to him. So much so that you end up giving him a soft, gentle kiss on the lips.

As much as it was a moment of euphoria, the moment you pulled away, you immediately got flustered and embarrassed, turning around since you weren’t able to face him. “I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have–“ And seeing Jongseob on the other bed? He heard a lot and probably saw a lot which made the whole thing more embarrassing for you.

You kick your feet slightly, hiding your face in your hands and just then feeling how hot your it was in the moment. Suddenly, you feel his arms wrap around your waist like they did in the photos of you two at that bus stop, bringing you closer into him. “I liked it. It was my first.” He mutters, voice slightly muffled.

“It was my first too.” You reply, hands off your face and turning around to bury it in his shoulder, still embarrassed to face him. You wrap an arm around him as to hug him loosely. “I love you, Haku.” You raise your head to bump your nose against his. He giggles, hugging you tighter.

“I love you more, Y/N.”

“Even more than your games?”

“More than my games and my rings. Get some rest now.”

You want to kiss him again in that moment, but he does it for you. Short and chaste, your lips meet long enough to feel each other’s connection, but short enough that it doesn’t escalate.

“At this point, can you two just sleep already? I’d rather you hug and spoon than hear you kiss all evening.” Jongseob sneers, almost forgetting he was even in the room. Soul feels you giggle into his shoulder, having you so close being the least of his worries. In fact, it was something he cherished.

Soul never let you out of his hold, and you never let him out of his.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

☀️: guys look at this

☀️: [Two images attached]

🐿️: OMG

🐿️: THEY’RE SO CUTE

🐿️: THEY’RE LIKE CUDDLING AIDHSIDNW

🐿️: IM SAVING THESE THANK YOU VERY MUCH

🐺: theo why are you taking pictures of them while they’re sleeping 🤨

🐺: that’s a little bit weird

☀️: ok but they’re cute

☀️: you’d do it too

🐺: tbh i would

🐯: they kissed

🐺: HUHH???

🐿️: SJAODJEBDIEBDK

🐶: wait actually

🐿️: where did you come from

🐶: i was disinterested until i saw jongseob’s text

🐺: are we talking like a kiss on the cheek or forehead cuz they do that a lot

🐯: lips

🐿️: OH MY GOD WHAT

🐺: WAIT ACTUALLY

🐺: SOUL GOT HIS FIRST KISS

🐶: keeho u probably havent kissed anyone why r u talking

🐺: shut up

☀️: yeah i walked in on them

🐯: they didnt make out or anything tho i think they’re both disgusted by the idea of it

🐺: thank god

🐶: you actually thought they were gonna make out or something just from the word ‘kiss’??

🐺: hey you can never be too careful

🐿️: i understood half of what they were saying until they switched back to japanese ugh i could hear them through the wall

🐯: are the walls actually that thin

🐿️: i hear you scream at your phone every time u watch something scary

🐯: okay anyways they were probably flirting with each other

🐯: i was literally there the whole time

🍟: (*^◯^*)

🐶: oh shit

🐺: morning soul!!

🐿️: why aren’t you just talking to each other instead of texting in the group chat you literally share a room

🍟: y/n is sleeping (( _ _ ))..zzzZZ

☀️: she actually is do u guys want proof

🐺: stop taking pictures of people in their sleep theo ur weird for that

🍟: [One image attached]

☀️: and when soul does it ur not gonna say anything

🐺: soul dont do that but yall r cute okay

☀️: this is so unfair

🐯: i have a picture of him taking that picture

🐺: what

🐶: this is so confusing

🐯: [One image attached]

🐿️: trippy @—@

🐺: soul how is she not waking up while you’re texting us

🍟: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

🍟: she is so pretty (//∇//)

🐿️: UGH EILFIWRNOAN

🐶: you are so down bad its crazy

🐺: jiung is literally squealing into his pillow rn

🐯: yeah we can hear

☀️: fr tho u guys r cute

🐶: soul pulls

🍟: (・・?)

🐺: it’s okay soul you’ll figure out what that means eventually

☀️: just tell him what’s stopping you

🐺: he spends a lot of time on the internet he’ll see it one way or another

🍟: jongseob i never gave her the earplugs u can have them back

🐶: is it cuz theo snores cuz honestly thats understandable

☀️: i do not snore that loud okay

🐯: my bed is right next to yours so that makes it 10 times louder

🐯: also just leave them on the nightstand soul ill take them back thanks

🐺: is someone gonna get up or are we just gonna keep texting here

☀️: soul would but he’s too busy holding his gf rn

🐯: do u guys want more photos

🐿️: yes

🐺: jongseob and theo you two need to stop taking pictures of y/n while she’s sleeping she’s gonna think you guys are creepy

☀️: you never said no

🐺: and i never said yes

🐯: soul is shielding her face in some of them tho at least its covered

🐿️: just send them

🍟: you can send them jongseob (^^)

🐯: see even soul says we can

🍟: wanna show how pretty y/n is

🐿️: oh my god you guys are so dsibwsidhsi

🐺: jiung is freaking out

🐶: soul i think u killed him

☀️: breaking up at this point would just end the world

☀️: treat her well soul

🐶: yeah you’ve got a good one

🍟: im too in love to let go (*´∀｀*)

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

and i am but a man, orbiting ‘round your sun. and it’s you that makes my day, after day. 🎧

#soul p1harmony #p1harmony #p1h soul #p1harmony imagines #haku shota #soul x reader #fanfiction #p1h imagines #p1h intak #p1h jiung #p1h jongseob #p1h keeho #p1h theo #p1harmony x reader #p1harmony x you

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miasbby · 1 year

Text

indefinitely ours.

(teacher!reader x teacher!Ellie x Abby)

summary : You're not willing to date nor looking for anyone, but Ellie Williams, the art teacher working in the school that hired you a year ago, is making you seriously doubt that decision. With her flirting, praises and constant touches, you're all but ready to give up and ask her out. That is, until you meet her girlfriend, Abby, who to your greatest shock seems very… curious about you.

word count : 7.2k (sorry)

note : this is my first fic in the tlou fandom ever, so it'll hopefully be good and i hope the characterization is okay! i wrote this to practice writing shorter fics and failed.... it probably won't get a part 2 but who knows!

warnings : smut with a bit of plot, female anatomy reader, occasionally mean!ellie and mean!abby but they love you<3, light objectification, degradation and exhibitionism, mention of anal, alcohol use and light intoxication, sub!reader, consent is respected but there’s a few bold moments, bit of a housewife kink, crying from overstimulation, threesome.

●○●○●○●○●○●

An ordinary life is not what most aim for, but you have to be honest in that regard: there’s nothing you’ve craved to achieve more than the simple peace of life, a peace often found in modesty yet sought in extravagance.

The primary school you joined last year has fulfilled that goal in more ways than one, allowing you the safety of a job you spent years dreaming of, a kind group of colleagues that have befriended you ever since you first arrived, and a class made up of the most adorable group of pupils, all eager to learn and earn the good graces of their favorite teacher judging by how the blue of your classroom’s walls are now entirely hidden by drawings. It’s on the outskirts of the city, in a cute area where prices had not soared just yet when you first bought a house, and the neighborhood couldn’t be more welcoming.

Your time is well-spent: between preparing lessons, finding original ideas to keep a hyperactive group of six years old entertained, taking care of the renovations your new house still requires, and caring for a vegetable garden you did not expect to grow so well, it’s safe to say that you don’t have much time left for anything else, and that includes a relationship. You haven’t been looking, really, happy to settle down on your own until life picks up a slower rhythm and to make friends rather than losing yourself in back and forths. Your previous relationships were never particularly fulfilling and often ended up being on and off until you got tired of the uncertainty. You’re done with all of that.

The only person that could make you doubt the choice of celibacy, however, currently has her back turned to you, rummaging through a tiny box of chalk sticks on her desk. The kids are out at lunch and you know she tends to eat on her own in here instead of the break room where all of the teachers often meet up. Of course, you only chose to come get her because she’s been a good friend, not because of any ulterior motive…

“Planning to stay hidden in there for long or are you going to come out and eat?”

Ellie doesn’t even appear startled and you wonder if she could somehow sense your presence by the door. She throws the tiny, useless pieces in the trash, reminding you to filter through your own box of it, and turns to face you with that eternally smug smile, leaning back against the side of her desk. It’s a mess, but that’s not surprising coming from Ellie. Whether it’s because she’s the art teacher in charge in the school or because that’s simply in her nature, you’re not sure, but you know to no longer be shocked by the sight of paper and paintbrushes thrown randomly on her desk.

“Planning on distracting me for much longer or is that gonna stop at some point?” she answers back. “You can’t come in here looking like this and seriously expect me to think of lunch.”

And that is exactly why Ellie is making you reconsider your opinion on dating.

If it weren’t for the constant light flirting you still don’t know how to read into, you think that handsomely sweet face would have convinced you anyway. It’s not that Ellie is your style, it’s that you’re convinced no one on this planet could be more attractive to you. Today’s look isn’t helping either: that opened cargo shirt barely hides the simple white tank top she must own in four identical copies and doesn’t do much to conceal the tight, sculpted lines of her arms, blues veins running down to paint-stained fingers.

Oh, if only you could stop thinking about how they’d feel dipping into the heat spreading from your clit down to your entrance, filling an emptiness that rings between your legs as much as it does in your heart. Unfortunately, such luck cannot be granted to you. Not yet, and perhaps not ever.

“You’re not flattering yourself out of coming with me.” You slide your hand down to the doorknob and motion for Ellie to follow you out, but she shakes her head, grabbing her phone in the back pocket of her jeans.

“Sorry,” she says, smile dropping with hesitation before she continues. “The girlfriend forgot her lunch at home and I’ve gotta go get it for her. But I’ll see you tonight, we’re still grabbing drinks with the team, right?”

You blink, cheeks straining from the efforts required to keep your smile up even as it turns dishonest, and try to make sense of the word she just uttered, any heat in your belly extinguished by an ice storm. Did she say girl friend or… girlfriend? Why would anyway refer to their friend that way, though… Stop lying to yourself, you got the meaning right on the first try.

Your heart does not break per se, but it skips a few beats you’re incapable of missing. In the few months you got to know each other, Ellie never mentioned a girlfriend nor did she introduce anyone to you.

Well, there goes your only temptation for a relationship. Celibacy it will have to be.

“Of course. See you tonight.”

If Ellie notices the light dim in your eyes, she doesn’t show.

—

That evening, you hesitate until the very last second about going home and finding a new show worth obsessing about or going out as promised. Ellie doesn’t give you much of a choice, however, when she shows up in your classroom right after the last student filters out with his father and pulls you out of your seat, refusing to take no for an answer.

(If it’s the request that convinces you or the strong hold she has on your wrist, you’re not sure. But you still let her tug you to your car anyway.)

The ‘team’ as referred to earlier consists of five other teachers whose classrooms are all sharing a hallway with yours and with whom you spend your Friday evenings in a local beer bar next door, a place Ellie first dragged you all into when you were still relative strangers, to celebrate your arrival. Your usual table is free when you arrive, Mel and Ellie right behind you, and you suppose a beer might be the best way to forget about your stupid little crush and the shame eating at your insides for having taken friendly banter as flirting for months now.

Overall, the night is fun, and after a few well-placed jokes at your expense, you finally manage to leave what happened earlier behind and enjoy yourself. Unfortunately, whatever superior being out there who’s decided you should, after a year of knowing each other, finally get to know all about Ellie’s girlfriend, is not on your side today.

“Oh, hey Abs!” Mel waves behind where you and Ellie sit, still somehow pressed up against each other, and your friend immediately brightens up, turning around to face someone. “Have you finally decided to join us? I thought you’d never leave that work of yours for even one night a week.”

“Maybe next week if she forces me to come.” The woman comes into view and immediately rests a hand on Ellie’s shoulder, smirking down at her before her eyes travel to you and stay locked onto your own for one second too long for it not to feel somehow… knowing. “But nah, I only got here to take Ellie home. I bet she drank too much to drive and that none of you would have been able to convince her not to take her car.”

Mel laughs, joined by the others, and even you have to agree on that. Ellie is particularly stubborn on the average day, but she gets even worse after three beers and a few shots.

“I’m fine, come on… I could drive on my own, a few beers have never killed me.”

The problem is, she says that while stretching an arm over the booth seat, enveloping your shoulders and tugging you closer to her side, and the only explanation for doing that in front of that literal goddess-looking muscle-paradise girlfriend of hers has to be the alcohol. ‘Abs’ raises a curious eyebrow but her smile never dies, and you look away to focus on the bottle clutched in your hand, guts turning into a mix of nervousness and shame that does not blend well with alcohol.

Abby stays around for a bit. The whole time, her eyes remain on you, taking in the features of your face, sweeping over your figure and translating what you would interpret as unabashed attraction if it came from anyone else. It’s like she’s trying to memorize your face, your body, your soul. Like she means to lay an invisible mark on your heart you’ll feel with every beat, right next to the one Ellie has unconsciously placed there long ago.

The arm only leaves its place on your shoulders when who you now know as Abby urges Ellie to go, and you leave soon after, sitting in the dark of your car for five minutes before your head clears enough for you to drive.

That was… definitely something. But you could unfortunately not explain what in any way.

The next time you see Abby does not offer any sort of clearer explanation as to why the mood always seems odd around you and Ellie, and particularly so when she’s there with you.

She comes around for drinks for the first time in months the following week and turns your offer to change seats down, seemingly fine with sitting next to you, her girlfriend on your other side. Her presence warms the hearts of everyone around the table but yours, stressing you out beyond sanity. You know you didn’t do anything wrong and that it’s probably a good thing that you learned of Ellie’s seemingly very joyful and fulfilling relationship now rather than after an attempted kiss or a date proposal. Yet, you cannot help but feel unsure around her - like she knows, like she can read through your heart and flick through its pages until its secrets have been bared.

Abby never talks to you nor mentions you in her conversations, yet, she’s always got an eye trailed on your figure, always silently insists on you being aware that you’re taking all of her attention.

And Ellie, well… Ellie has not changed, and that’s probably where the actual problem lies.

She still smiles at you with that signature smugness you know is only reserved for her girlfriend. She still flirts and teases and touches, still makes comments about how prettily you blush and how well that shirt fits you and you never know what to answer to any of those things. This time again, one of her arms is spread over your shoulders, her fingers fiddling with the fabric of Abby’s shirt on your other side, and if anyone were to look, they’d probably think you’re dating either of them - if not both.

Your thoughts are interrupted by her voice, and you almost let go of the glass of water you requested earlier when its now familiar murmur tickles your ear. “I like this skirt. Is it me you got it for? I’m sure Abby would like it just as much.”

Poorly disguised shock shines in your eyes but Ellie appears unphased, not even bothering with a glance at where her girlfriend listens to Mel vent about a fight between two of her students. You clear your throat, avoiding the heaviness of her stare, and shake your head timidly, scared to voice out your thoughts or to be heard. The fabric isn’t anything short per se, but it rode up your thighs through the night, and you’re suddenly far too aware of where Abby’s glances might have led to earlier. Ellie’s only response is a chuckle.

You think that’s the end of it but that’s without counting on the end of the night - when everyone leaves but Ellie insists you stay around some more, and Abby doesn’t show any interest in moving away, her thighs spread and pressing you further into Ellie. The arm behind your back moves and this time, you can’t control the way your body jumps when she places a hand just above your knee, stroking the tight fabric of your skirt.

“So,” you begin, trying to break the silence. “How long have you two been together?”

Abby takes a swing of her beer and your eyes follow the bulging muscle of her biceps until Ellie reminds you of her presence by patting your thigh affectionately. “Three years now. We met when Abby came around the school to renovate the gym with her crew and ended up moving in two months later. She’s a carpenter.”

“Oh,” you exclaim, interested but also still very much nervous. “That’s definitely helpful to have around at home. How long have you been doing this for?”

It’s the first time you address her directly and the kindness you’re met with feels almost surprising. You don’t think you would be kind to someone your girlfriend is two inches away from touching inappropriately right under your nose, but you suppose you should be glad that’s the case here.

“Ever since I was a kid, really. Being a carpenter didn’t exactly fit my father’s plans but he always encouraged me anyway when I saw how much fun I had fixing things and building my own. What about you? What got you to into teaching?”

Tension leaves your back altogether when her answer reflects the smile perched on her lips and the mirth shining in her eyes. “Children, really. It started with babysitting and then all I could think about was teaching.”

Abby’s eyes dip down to your lips. “That’s cute.”

“I told you she’s adorable,” Ellie interrupts. “And beautiful too, isn’t she? I knew she’d be your type.”

Your lips part to speak but before a protest can slip past them, Abby nods, smile turning almost predatory. “I’d say she’s your own just as much. You’ve always liked your girls a bit innocent.”

“I’m not-”

“Can you blame me, though?”

Abby pretends to think for a second and gets that knowing look again, reading through the blush spreading up to your ears and the fast ups and downs of your chest in ways you fail to understand yourself. Everything’s going too fast, like a ball bouncing from one side of the court to the other, and it suddenly feels like they’re discussing you, praising you, without even including you in the conversation anymore.

“No. I think I understand.”

Ellie chuckles, inching her hand higher up on your lap, and she allows the silence to persist for a moment longer before standing up to order another round for you. Abby never looks away. You’re still trying to comprehend what just happened, still failing to make sense of why your friend’s partner is staring at you like she’s considering the interest of throwing you over the table dirty with food crumbs and alcohol spills and flexing those fingers inside of your cunt instead of playing with the tip of her bottle.

“Oh, you’ve got some crumbs here,” Abby says, eyes flicking down to wear your shirt wraps tightly around your chest. You follow her line of sight, wondering how that could be when you didn’t eat any of the fries they ordered earlier, and find nothing. “Here, I’ll get them off for you.”

Before a word of gratefulness can echo between the two of you, your lips part in shock, a hand positioning itself right above your breast and arching a curious eyebrow, staring into the depths of your eyes. There’s no hesitation in the action, but rather a sort of anticipation you find yourself trapped into. “Is this alright?” she asks, the “Yes,” out by your lips before you can even make sense of what she means.

Deep down, you know what it means. Deep down, you’ve got a feeling Abby might have been familiar with you far before your recent introduction.

Once your agreement has been voiced, Abby startles you, immediately aiming for your right breast and gripping it with the whole length of her palm. A thumb rubs at soft skin only hidden by the light fabric of your shirt, almost transparent, not thick enough to act as a proper barrier, and you can feel it all - the heat of her hand, its roughness, how it’s thick enough, big enough to effortlessly envelop all of one breast.

It’s the first time her eyes have moved away from the trance they had yours stuck into, her stare dipping down to where she pretends to rub at your shirt, only reminding you of the absence of a bra to truly cover you. Your nipple hardens under her palm and that seems to be the goal because her hand changes sides, repeating the process, teasing and rubbing, the cotton fabric too rough for the sensitive little bud. Your thighs rub against each other, failing to get any sort of release from the pressure burning your cunt, hips almost bucking in a silent plea to be filled up by those very same fingers.

Abby smiles, still kind, still honest, and shifts her hand only to roll it between two fingers, pulling a wet moan from your lips you fear the people behind you might catch. “See, that’s better now, isn’t it?” And just like that, she pulls away, hand settling back around her beer, leaving you to deal with the wetness soaking your underwear and the blush heating your face, shining like a broken christmas light.

“Y-yeah.” It’s odd that you even manage to speak when flames circle hardened nipples, driving you into unknown depths of desire, but you’re proud to say you at least manage a coherent sound. “Thank you.”

When Ellie comes back, conversation follows a course far more normal, and if it weren’t for the hooded eyes, the pulsing heat, and the hand claiming its spot back on your lap, you’d think you hallucinated all of the tension.

The state of your underwear when you strip down before a shower later that night, however, is all the proof you need. Yet, you fail to truly comprehend what happened. The innocence that almost shone in Abby’s eyes as she touched you is impossible to make sense of, and the next morning, you’re no longer sure of what her intentions truly were.

Did she mean to tease you like Ellie has been doing - as a friend, a friend who has a pretty interesting definition of the word platonic but a friend nonetheless? Or was this more?

You’re not sure, but if anything, you won’t be the one to bring up the question just yet.

Ellie and Abby are coming over to your house to help with the endless renovations you’ve been making. And no, it wasn’t your idea.

You’ve been avoiding thinking about Abby and how she’s just as illegally fine as who you already considered to be the hottest woman alive, and although ignoring Ellie is impossible, you at least made some progress this past week with accepting the flirting as some meaningless fun. When you complained about the difficulties you’ve been having with painting the ceilings of two rooms and fixing the guest room bed, however, Ellie suggested that they come over to help and, well, how could you turn down such a nice proposal?

That’s how you end up watching them by the kitchen’s window as they relax around a glass of iced tea in the garden, cheeks stained with light grey paint and arms bared, water running in the sink and acting as the background noise to your current fantasies.

The mind owns a power the heart only dreams of having, capable of eternal wanderings uncontrolled by even the strongest wills.

Yours has not resisted purposeless dreams. Dreams that once involved Ellie, a sweet craving for what could perhaps come to exist in the realm of reality - a craving for late-night guitar sessions and paintings in bold colors, for rough palms to sculpt your heart into submission and teasing smirks wiped away by kisses. Dreams that now involve someone else, a person you have yet to truly understand but who seems to perfectly fit a puzzle from which you did not believe a piece lost. Her body rings with a rigidity that’s a lot more pronounced, yet her heart appears softer, willing to lead you further into the depths of a euphoric swamp.

A blurry motion startles you out of your thoughts and you blink to find the water is still running, the time still passing. Ellie is waving at you and Abby is staring with a raised eyebrow of curiosity.

You smile, waving back, and turn off the tap.

Fantasies are just that, unfortunately. You’ll have to make do with your imagination because it seems Abby isn’t intending on repeating what you’re getting more and more convinced was meaningless teasing anytime soon.

They spend the next weekend at your house too, fixing broken cupboards and a tall wardrobe you couldn’t figure out how to close fully, helping with the garden and any heavy objects you need to move around.

It comes to a point where you decide that if you can’t have either of them, then dreaming is fine. The only problem is that you end up doing that a lot, and getting caught is inevitable.

“Could I borrow your shower?” asks Ellie once the day reaches its end, the sun freefalling on the horizon. “I don’t want to dirty your couch.” Abby has fetched a chair for the same reason but you know how much Ellie like to sit beside you. Her girlfriend’s presence has not stopped the oncoming stream of cuddles she requires from you, and you’re more than happy to be held, touch-starved since the end of your last relationship.

“Sure. I’ll get the food ready.”

You stand from the couch to head for the kitchen but before you can disappear, Ellie grips the hem of her shirt and pulls it up, revealing a glistening, tight stomach in what feels like a slow motion to you but is surely a very normal pace for anyone else. The fabric slides off her shoulders and gets thrown straight to Abby’s face but your brain is in no way capable to register anything but newly revealed skin and soft curves hidden under a white sports bra.

“Feel free to join me,” she adds, teasingly, and you know it has to be directed at Abby who, it seems, is just as affected as you are judging by the darkened gaze she keeps directed at Ellie, but if that’s the case, then you cannot explain why Ellie is staring right at you as she says it before turning around and leaving for the bathroom.

It’s that gaze you see once they’re gone that night, writhing on top of your bed, covers thrown to the floor and pillow wet with your spit. It’s that gaze encouraging a second, then a third finger to fit into your cunt, the pressure too much yet so far from what you wish for, from how well you know they would both fill you, breaching past undesired tightness and taking all that you’re willing to give.

And it’s their voices, blended in as one, whispering praise into your ear and urging you to let go when you finally fall over the edge, tears pooling in your eyes and teeth aching from the marks they’ve left in that poor pillow.

“You know,” you begin, words not slurring but speech clearly affected by physical exhaustion and beer. “I thought you were flirting with me before you suddenly mentioned your girlfriend.”

A chuckle greets you, but you can’t tell if it comes from Abby or Ellie, both of them cuddling on the couch in front of you as you lay on the fluffy chair you bought for decoration purposes but that’s actually pretty amazing to use when sleepy. The night has fallen and you spent a lot of time in the garden today while Abby watched over you and Ellie finished with painting touch-ups, explaining the tiredness numbing your arms and the effects of the alcohol.

Your eyes remain closed and you shift around when air tickles the bottom of your stomach, your shirt having ridden up to reveal skin.

“What if I was?” and this time, you know it’s Ellie - sure, because it sounds like her, but also because she’s the one who likes teasing you the most.

You huff, internally rolling your eyes. “With a girlfriend like Abby, trust me, you were not. You’d be dumb to flirt with anyone else or want to kiss anyone else,” you say, voice barely above a murmur. That second beer should not have been handed in your hand, but Ellie has always been a bad influence and Abby drinks them with little effort. Slowly, you half-whisper, “Bet her lips are so soft.”

Abby laughs this time, reminding you of her presence, but you’re too far gone to care. “I think yours would put up a great fight in a contest,” she says, the smile evident in her voice. “Maybe even win, who knows. I know I wouldn’t mind trying you out.”

“Hey!” Ellie interrupts, “I get to try her out first. I found her. You would want me first, wouldn’t you?”

It takes a while for you to register the question and understand you’re being spoken to. “I think I want the both of you… together.”

Someone’s breath hitches, but you fall asleep before you can find out whose.

All you remember the next morning is strong arms holding onto the back of your thighs and your back carrying you up the stairs, a pair of sweet lips leaving a kiss on your forehead, and the throbbing traces of a hand on the naked skin of your stomach.

That must have been a fairly nice dream.

You’re in the kitchen when things truly take a turn you did not expect to happen in reality, breaching the realm of fantasies and fully stepping into your life - your peaceful and joyful life that, as you will soon come to realize, was actually missing two precious souls to reach the desperate form of completion you sought.

Abby is drying the dishes you’re washing and Ellie is… well, she’s simply being herself, avoiding any sort of chore and whistling in the living room as she chooses what movie you’ll all be watching tonight. The mood has been particularly tense today and this time, you’re glad to say it’s not your fault. Abby has been especially attentive to you, asking about your day, your past, and the shape you imagine your future to take, casually exchanging indecipherable looks with Ellie. They’re more than familiar with your house now yet they’ve never acted more like strangers scared of trespassing.

If you didn’t know better, you would think of them as almost… afraid.

Fortunately, the tension left as soon as night fell and you all settled back into soothing habits. At least, that’s what you think, until a shadow looms over your back, blocking the naked lightbulb from shining light on the last plate in your hand, and you realize that Ellie isn’t as busy as she made it out to be.

“Dinner was great, thanks for preparing all of it again,” she says, supporting her weight with one hand on the countertop and the left one innocently resting on your hip. Her touch is welcomed and familiar, her palm cupping the curve to perfection. “Anyone ever told you you’d make the perfect little wife?”

You chuckle, rolling your eyes although you know she won’t be able to see it. “If that’s truly the case, there’d be a lot more people pilling up at my door, or at least one person. I think you two are just terrible cooks in desperate need of a chef.”

Abby shakes her head, nudging you with her elbow as she wipes water from a pack of forks. “You’re not wrong in thinking we’d wife you up in an instant if you wanted, but not because you’d be a great chef.”

“Yeah,” Ellie agrees, flexing her fingers where they rest on your hip. “I can think of a few other reasons. You’d be an amazing mother, for one, and you’re far more patient than either of us deserve.”

“And you’re ready to put up with her stubbornness, so a perfect match, really.” Abby’s comment makes you laugh but Ellie speaks again before you can tease her about her own issues with never doing as told.

“All of that, and I even bet you’d be such a pretty little thing to fuck.” Your hands freeze on where you’ve just put the plate away, tension seizing unready muscles. You blink, staring by the window, the night turning it into a mirror and reflecting the shock wild in your eyes. For a second, you’re convinced to have misheard. But the silence that follows tells the opposite story. Ellie’s close, suddenly, closer than she was before, and Abby’s hands have stilled as well, her body tight with stress. “I feel like we didn’t thank you properly for all the meals you’ve prepared for us. What do you think, Abby?”

At the edge of your vision, you can sense that Abby has given in and glances at you from the corner of an eye, the sound of her breathing audible, loud. “I think she very much likes politeness, and… it would be rude not to give back after taking so much, wouldn’t it?”

“Right. And what about you, um?” The hand on your hip slowly slides closer to your front before drawing back, again and again, in what feels like a maddening caress. “Do you think we should thank you? Together, I mean.”

Later, you’ll have more than enough time to consider just how stupid it was for you, at that precise moment, to doubt the true meaning behind Ellie’s suggestion. There’s a part of you that yearns for this to be real, for it to feel real, but that part cannot be allowed to exist because it is directly connected to a risk of disappointment you’re not sure you would survive. So, when you reply a breathy little, “Yes,” you don’t actually expect what follows.

“Good girl.”

A whine spills past your lips but the reason behind its existence is blurry - is it the praise, vibrating through your lungs and soaking your cunt, or is it the hand that fully slides against your front, rubbing at the seam of your jeans frustratingly right above your heat, the other suddenly palming the curve of your ass and roughly kneading skin? You think you’ll never know for the first moan, but the next one is inevitably due to the second pair of hands finding a place to have some fun of their own.

“I can feel how soaked you are already,” Ellie says, tone teasing, taunting and forcing past your defenses. “Are you sure you didn’t expect this to happen? How often did you fuck yourself wishing it was us, hmm, pretty girl?”

You think that question should not require an answer, mostly because you’re incapable of giving any, incapable of getting that brain of yours to think and function properly. But Abby doesn’t seem happy with your silence, and she finally decides to remind you of her presence.

“We asked you a question, sweetheart.” Her voice startles you and your head turns to face her, your heart soothed by the admiration and the awe and the desire reflected in usually tight features. She’s smiling, not that usually kind expression but one that’s almost amused, and you realize you’re in serious, serious trouble with these two. Two fingers seize you by the chin, pushing it upward, and a thumb rubs at your bottom lip. “How empty did you feel thinking about how good we could take care of you?”

“I- I didn’t-” Ellie’s nails sink into the flesh of your ass, reprimanding, and Abby tuts, shaking her head disappointedly.

“It’s alright,” she adds. “You can be honest with us. There’s not a single time we fucked since you started working here that we didn’t think about you, about how complete you’d make us.” And you’re going to process that at some point, but now will not be that time. Not when she continues to speak, stealing any hope for coherency from under your feet. “We’ll take care of you now, though. Come on, Ellie, don’t be a tease.”

Ellie hesitates, hands still, fingers flexing. They stare at each other with blazing heat in what you think could be a fight for dominance you’re not sure to make sense of when they could just take out all of that on you.

“You better beg for it.”

When the gearwheels begin to roll again, you lose all sense of reality.

It’s like they both observed you for months, like they figured out what button to push and with how much strength, what you love and what you’re too ashamed to admit you need. Chills of shame erupt on your arms at the idea, worsened by how smoothly Ellie works your body.

“Let’s get these off you,” she mutters, lips hovering right next to your nape, inches away from a kiss. “You won’t be needing them around us anymore.”

There’s possessiveness in her words and there’s possessiveness in how fast she slips the button of your jeans off and tugs on the material, slowly, as if to admire what is finally hers to worship and use as she deems fit. Abby growls, watching with a well-trained eye as the tight fabric slides over your ass, and her hand moves down to press against your throat, keeping your back shamefully arched, ass raised for their eyes to feast onto. Your pants end halfway down your thighs, and you have to say there’s nothing surprising about Ellie’s eagerness to get to the source of her desires, hot between your thighs.

“Abby told me I’d love your ass. Guess she wasn’t wrong.” You expect your underwear to follow next but she decides not to bother with that. “Ever gotten fucked there before, or are you keeping that tight little hole for when we decide to use it?”

“N-never, I- I don’t-”

Abby sighs, shaking her head warningly. “Ellie… focus.”

“Right, sorry. We’ll keep that in mind for another time, you’re ours now anyway, aren’t you? Our pretty little toy.”

You’re all but ready to cry when fingers slides into the front of your underwear, familiar roughness perceptible in the actions, immediately drenched in your desires. Your cunt aches, your core throbs, and your nipples harden. A cocktail of needs that can only be sated by much more than what you’re given. Efficient fingers part your folds before expertly reaching that little bud of sensitiveness at the top of your mound, circling it, pinching it, driving you crazy with it.

But that’s not what truly seals the first release of the night. That only comes when Abby decides to fully join in on the fun.

Fingers unbutton your shirt until it parts to reveal the pale pink bra that matches the current dark pink of your panties, only abandoning your neck until the offending lace has been pushed right under your breasts and returning to its hold. You think Abby’s going to kiss you, for a moment, but she’s only reveling in the hot puffs of air slipping past your lips and trying to swallow down the guttural moan that vibrates in your throat when Ellie decides she wants to take the next step.

The hand that had for now been palming your ass travels closer to your center and tugs flimsy fabric out of the way carelessly. You’re not given a warning when the first finger breaches past your entrance, only the sound of Ellie spitting on her fingers for unnecessary lube and that feeling of needing frustratingly more. A whine lodges itself at the back of your throat, and they both laugh, only turning your frustration worse.

You want to move and fight back, tell them you’re more than capable of taking charge yourself. But there’s something about being treated as a toy meant to receive pleasure, about being admired and taken and praised, about that second finger joining the first and filling the tightness of your cunt, that forces you into a soothing form of submission, allowing every touch and taking them willingly.

Abby palms at one breast, rolling a nipple under the strong surface in a touch that translates all of her strength. “Is that blush for us, pretty thing? You’re gonna come all over her hand like a good slut already, aren’t you?”

And, it’s cruel, but of course you do.

Ellie flexes her fingers, increasing the speed of her arm. You can’t see it, but you know veins must shy prettily all over her forearm and biceps must be bulging from the tightness required to fuck you like she does now - like she wants to pull orgasm after orgasm from your core until you no longer understand what it means not to feel the maddening pulse of a release coursing through your body like liquid fire. Abby turns meaner, rougher, pinching a nipple between two fingers and pressing the hand further into your neck, forcing you to follow its direction and standing further on your toes.

Four hands - teasing, fucking, taking.

Two souls tauntingly attracting your own into their orbit, sealing an invisible lock around your heart, your body, your being itself.

And sweet, sweet praise, whispered right under your ear, sending you into a release you’re helpless to control.

“Ellie, Abby… I-” The moan that travels from your chest and spills past your lips is rough, guttural, connected to the inhuman waves of pleasures rocking through your body. Your cunt clenches around the fingers still thrusting in and out of your center, clinging onto the digits until they’re forced to stop, Ellie breathing heavily in your ear. Abby kisses down the curve of your throat, teeth nibbling at sensitive skin and laying a mark you refuse to ever cover.

Your moan ends, broken off in tense breathing, your heart threatening to jump out of your chest, and that’s when you catch the groan vibrating Ellie’s throat. It, too, falls into silence.

Abby swears against your skin, a deep, rough “Fuck,” that sends shivers down your spine.

“Told you she’d be the cutest little thing to corrupt,” Ellie teases, slowly sliding out of you, fighting against the tightness of your walls and your eagerness to be fucked into a stupid mess. “She’s all proper and shit but I could tell she’d love it.”

“I never doubted you.” Abby says, kissing the lone tear sliding down your cheek with all of the tenderness she can conjure. “Come on, let’s get her on a proper surface.”

Heat blooms on your cheeks when Ellie steps away to allow Abby to take you into her arms, the ground suddenly disappearing from under your feet. The way they talk about you like you’re not even there, like you’re too fucked out to understand a single word, would be shameful under any other circumstance. You know it’s only a game when Ellie takes advantage of finally facing you by planting a soft kiss on your forehead, pushing away a lazy strand of hair.

They begin to walk toward your bedroom like they perfectly know the way, and your vision turns dark right as they push the door open.

“Can you hold her open for me or have you been slacking at the gym?”

Your eyes remain closed, but your brain kickstarts itself into working properly again. You can feel the familiar linen of your sheets under your ass and soft naked breasts pressed against your back, another weight shifting in front of you on the bed.

The body behind yours shakes in rhythm with a chuckle and you recognize Ellie. “Can you still eat pussy or should we trade so I can show you? Sorry we didn’t plan for your strap, I thought she might have a cock lying around but… we’ll have to take care of that next time.”

“Fuck you,” says Abby half-heartedly, the sound followed by more shifting.

You’re fully aware again when Ellie grabs the back of your thighs and tugs them, spreading your legs and allowing air to tickle the slick still running from your center, drenched folds bared for anyone to use as they please.

“Come on, get to it. I know you’re hungry.”

Another pair of hands holds you by the ass and your eyes flutter open, hoping to catch sight of what you once dreamed about. Abby barely spares you a glance before she all but leaps to feast on your cunt, igniting a fire not yet extinguished.

“Abby… Abby…” You repeat her name like a plea, like a prayer. Your hips buck and trash around, your heart pauses and starts again, your releases come and come again right after each other until you exist no more, a broken toy a kid cannot help but continue to play with.

Lips circle your clit and suck, pull and deliver rough kisses. An expert tongue gathers slicks at your entrance and spreads it all over already drenched folds, eating rather than licking, a starved woman relishing in her first and last mean. It’s all too much, too soon, too sensitive, and you’re in no way capable of pulling away, four hands keeping you all tight and secure in their hold, a prisoner to your own pleasure.

“Keep them coming, pretty thing. I want your cunt red by the time we’re done with you tonight,” Ellie murmurs in your ear before resuming the path of tenderness her mouth trailing on down your neck.

You only find the strength left in yourself to follow that order.

An unwelcomed warmth burns your closed eyelids and you shift, attempting to escape its path. To your great despair, it doesn’t budge. A tired groan echoes in the room and you blink sleep back into your body, limbs stretching and encountering a soreness that did not exist before.

Oh. Right. Last night happened and… it was not a dream this time.

Fear seizes your heart for a moment and you quickly look around, scared to find the bed empty save for your body. A happy sigh of relief marks the moment you see them - Abby clinging to Ellie’s back, still sound asleep and temptingly naked, and Ellie holding onto your waist, staring up at you with a smug look and a kind smile.

“Morning,” she says, voice broken from sleep. “You didn’t think we’d abandon you, did ya?”

“N-no I… I’m just happy to see you.” You cannot control the dumb smile that widens on your lips, and Ellie’s smirk only widens, her hold pulling you back into the eternal depths of the sheets.

“We’re not going anywhere, try to get some more sleep.”

It’s a simple sentence, meaningless on the surface.

Yet, you know it’s more than that.

It’s a promise.

A promise for more, meant to suppress the doubts blossoming in your chest. A promise that they’ll be there when you awake again, and again, and again.

#ellie williams #abby anderson #ellie williams x abby anderson x reader #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x reader #abby anderson x reader #abby x reader #the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie williams smut #abby anderson smut #ellie williams x abby anderson #ellabs

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imagine-that-100 · 1 year

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Chicken Shop Date | Part 5 |

By @imagine-that-100 and @alovesreading

Description: Matty Healy x Reader (Female) | You and your best friend Amelia came up with a very simple idea of taking celebrities on awkward chicken shop dates, and somehow, it’s managed to become both of your jobs. In the past, you’ve found sitting across from some of the biggest stars on the planet and eating chicken nuggets easy. But then Amelia manages to score you a date with the man who you’ve been obsessed with since you were nineteen; Matty Healy.

Word Count: 24.5k

A/N: Heyyyyyy, so this part is a lot. We really hope you enjoy Matty and Baby’s date! It’s finally New Year’s Eve, yayyyyyy!!! Me and A are going to go and find some holy water, but we hope you enjoy the new part and we can’t wait for your reactions. Thanks so much for reading x

| N’s Masterlist | A’s Masterlist |

~*~*~*~ New Year’s Eve ~*~*~*~

Today is finally the day.

After 3 long months, and this last week stretching on forever, it’s finally New Year’s Eve.

And you’re feeling every emotion under the sun.

Considering you love sleeping, you got such a small amount last night because of your nerves for today. You’re sure there was excitement in your system as well that made it difficult to stay asleep, but all you know for certain was that every time you woke up your heart was racing.

You think you probably got about 6 hours in total, but you were waking up every hour or so and when you saw that it was 8am you just decided to get up because there was no way you were getting back to sleep. And you willed the hours of the day to disappear, but time seemed to be moving agonisingly slowly.

Getting ready early is never really a thing you do but today after you showered, you started getting ready at 12:30 for your date which is at 4:30. It’s probably one of the stupidest things you could have done because you had already planned your outfit with Amelia the day before and it doesn’t take you a long time to do your hair or make up.

You were ready by 2 o’clock, but you held off from putting your outfit on because you didn’t want to crumple it as you sat lounging around waiting for the time to tick away. And today time seemed to be moving even slower than it had done the past week.

How you wish you had both decided to go out even earlier so you weren’t wishing your day away.

The only thing that made the time pass a little quicker was the text you received from Matty at about 2:45 saying, If you stand me up I’m coming to your flat and making you pay for it xx

That eliminated some of your nerves because in the back of your mind there was always that seed of doubt that this date might never happen and you’d get stood up. You’d been burnt before a few years ago and the worry never really left on each actual date you’d been on since.

To keep things lighthearted, you remind him of your words from a few months earlier, Like I said I’m a professional, I’d never stand someone up x

Think of my reputation, I wouldn’t damage it. You know far too many people… You also quickly add, and just to tease him that little bit more before you see him again, you send, How would I ever get my date with George?? xxx

You can picture the way he probably bites his tongue and shakes his head when he reads that last one come through on his phone. And you’re certain it probably happened like that because his response is, You’re a little bitch xx

Thank you, I know x You reply, giggling the entire time.

God, you really can’t wait to be in his presence again. It’s bad just how much you’re craving it at this point.

You decide to tease him just once more before your date because you know you’re just putty in his hand when you’re in person, so you reply, Although, depends on what the payment is because sounds interesting xx

But even his response now makes your cheeks heat up and you want to squeal into your hands, Don’t tease or we won’t make it to the date x

Grinning like a Cheshire Cat, you text him back saying, Exactly why you’re not picking me up and I’m meeting you there xx

4:30 on the dot or there will be consequences Miss Y/L/N xx He warns you again, but it makes you even more cheeky, and you can’t stop yourself from replying accordingly.

See you at 4:31 xxx

When you check the time again after that, it’s 3 and now you can’t stop yourself from getting ready. You lay your outfit out on your bed early which mostly consists of your Miu Miu clothes that you were given.

You wanted that on to tease him with, as you know that was one of your Instagram pictures that he liked. But the weather was far too cold for a mini skirt, so instead you chose black leather pants to accompany your black bralette, which pretty much acts like a crop top, and blazer.

And just to add to it, you decided the only accessory you’d be wearing would be a black ribbon that you’re going to tie around your neck in a bow, like a choker. And you’re definitely doing this because as soon as you even mentioned it, Amelia agreed.

After slipping your Louis Vuittons on, you’re pretty much ready to go. The only thing left to do is for the clock to tick down and you’ll finally be able to have your second date with Matty Healy.

What the fuck is your life?

~*~*~*~

Getting to the restaurant a little early probably wasn’t the best for Matty’s nerves, even if it only was ten minutes. Because he lives in North, he decided that he needed to give it at least an hour and twenty minutes for the hour drive it was to get to Brixton from his.

He was so eager to leave his house after getting ready though that he wasn’t fussed about the time. But now waiting for you to arrive is slowly eating him alive.

Like you, Matty didn’t sleep well either. Although, that’s quite usual for him, last night was beyond a joke. It was almost 4am before he fell asleep the first time, and he’d woken up every hour or so filled with nerves before forcing himself back to sleep.

He got a 3 solid hours of sleep in around 7am and he woke up a little after 10am feeling a little more refreshed and he decided he should probably get ready for the day. He showered, and when he was about to put the gel in his hair he stopped himself, knowing that you really prefer his hair curly and he would do just about anything to see the smile on your face like last time when you started playing with his curls.

The clock was agonisingly slow all fucking day and it was slowly driving him insane. He kept himself busy by bothering his friends, not talking about his upcoming date with anyone but George, who knew exactly why Matty was bothering him today.

Eventually the clock hit 2 and Matty got himself ready. He decided on a suit and he was going to go one better than last time and wear a bow tie instead of a plain old boring tie. But as he was attempting to do it without his stylist Patricia’s help he was failing miserably.

After a 5 minute FaceTime with her, and him attempting about 10 times and still failing, she ended up telling him to stop stressing out and just wear it untied as it still looked good. And after much internal debate when the call ended he decided that she was right, he left it hanging around his neck undone with his top button undone too.

When his taxi arrived, he double checked he had his wallet, phone, and cigarettes before he locked up. He doesn’t even care if he’s forgotten anything, he just can’t wait to see you again.

The drive feels like it takes forever, but he doesn’t care because with each passing second he’s getting closer to you. He’s really thankful he had his PA phone up the restaurant too not long after he made the reservation to ask if there was any chance the two of you could have a semi private table, and thankfully they agreed.

He doesn’t want any distractions from you today, and he’s aware you both can get recognized while out on this date so for both your peace of mind he was glad you could get a private space to enjoy each other’s company.

When he gets there, he just can't seem to stand still but he forces himself to lean against a column outside as he mindlessly scrolls through his phone to pass the time. It’s only a few minutes left until 4:30 so he knows you’ll be arriving soon and if he doesn’t distract himself then he’ll go mad over how slow time seems to be going.

Looking at the time on his phone again has him even more nervous, because it’s now eight minutes over your agreed time so his brain has him thinking of the scenario you promised him earlier wouldn’t happen.

And he knows he should trust your words but the excitement is slowly turning into anxiety and it’s not a pleasant feeling that’s gathering at the pit of his stomach.

Matty lights up a cigarette in hopes of helping him settle down a bit, and it works but not as much as a text of your coming through does.

He sighs in relief when he reads, I’m so sorry, I fully didn’t intend on being late but I’m stuck in traffic. I’m on my way xx

Taking a drag of his cigarette, he smiles to himself just from picturing you all stunning in the backseat of a taxi on your way to meeting him. Suddenly his anxiety turns into excitement again and he just wants everyone to move over so you can rush through the streets and make it to him faster.

Just imagining how you might be in the same position as him, he sends you a reassuring, It’s okay baby, I’ll be here waiting for you xx and when you get it, you feel your soul coming back to your body.

It’s not like he’d just up and leave for you being a few minutes late but there’s that constant thought in the back of your mind that loves to remind you how the whole situation is too good to be true and considering how things have gone for you in the past, your insecurities can get the best of you.

But just that one text has calmed you down and now you’re just squirming in your seat as your Uber slowly makes its way through the streets, stopping far more than you enjoy, and you’re painfully aware of every minute ticking by.

Every time the car has stopped in the past ten minutes, your heart has been going a bit faster and once the Uber driver hits the brakes again only one road away from the restaurant, you’re just completely done with it.

Your heart feels like it’s coming out of your chest when you open the door after you’ve told the driver that you’ll be getting out right there. You’d rather walk it than wait for everyone in front of you to move.

In a haste you make it out of the car right at the door of the Atlantic and you let out a shaky breath when you glance to your left and you can see the big letters of the Brixton House.

You swear you’ve not moved quicker in your life when you walk under the bridge and past a cafe, it’s just when you take a second to breathe right in front of the Brixton House that you see him waiting at the entrance of the restaurant, fiddling with his fingers and tapping his foot anxiously on the pavement.

You feel bad when you let out a giggle looking at him all nervous, you make sure your gaze stays on him as you walk a bit further just so you can stand directly in front of him across the street. And you just can’t help but admire all of him, curls perfectly untouched for you, dressed in a black suit and black dress shoes, an undone bowtie hanging around his neck, top button of his white shirt undone.

It’s a miracle you don’t melt right there and then when his eyes finally find yours and his whole face falls in such relief as he takes a deep breath and his hand comes over his chest. The biggest smile breaks on his face and you chuckle when you see him mouth a wow at you after giving you a full look.

Biting your bottom lip, you shrug as if it’s nothing to be amazed at and without wasting another second, you take advantage of the cars having stopped in traffic to cross the road and walk straight to him.

Automatically, your arms fly around his shoulders and his find their home around your waist, and the smell of his aftershave and cigarettes drowns you completely, making your head spin. It’s right then when it fully sinks in just how much you’ve missed him and your heart just grows in your chest when he clutches you a bit tighter to his chest.

“I’m sorry,” is the first thing you say, you hate knowing you’re about 15 minutes late and that he’s definitely been overwhelmed by that nagging feeling when somebody stands you up. “I truly didn’t mean to.”

Your voice sounds so incredibly worried so he gives you a little squeeze and jokes to help you relax, “It's actually terrible, and you were the one to call me out on our first date for being late. Don’t you only live ten minutes away from here?”

Chuckling into his neck, you poke his ribs to get back at him, making him jump in your arms at the sudden attack.

You take a deep breath, loosening your grip around him and he does the same so you both lean back to look at one another with your hands still on each other. “I know, I know,” You start, your hands going from his shoulders to cup his jaw and rub circles on his cheeks, “And I feel terrible.”

Matty feels like he’s putty in your hands, you make him feel so warm inside, he finds himself just wanting more of your touch. “I’m hurt.” He adds with a pout, playfully only because he wants his joke to keep going so he can give it to you like you gave it to him on your first date.

You pout back at him, continuing with your soft touches on his skin. “I’m so sorry, it’s been a nightmare.” You love the stubble he has going on right now, he just looks so good you can’t help letting your eyes wander all over his face now that you have him in front of you again.

“Do you have an excuse?” He jokingly challenges you to say something.

You look at him with pursed lips since your only excuse is exactly the one he gave you all those moons ago, “The traffic was terrible.”

“Always traffic.” He rolls his eyes and scoffs, his dramatic reaction makes you giggle and it takes only that sound to make him smile at you, “You can just admit you weren’t ready, you know?” He points out with raised eyebrows, still trying to appear serious but his elation to having you with him again has him completely failing as it just shines through his face.

You sigh, knowing that he’s joking about it all but you still feel the need to explain yourself. “Okay, god honest truth: I started getting ready at half twelve, was ready around two, but I just didn’t put my outfit on until three, so I didn’t ruin it by lounging about in it.”

You play back the day in your head and you’re almost wincing when you continue, “I was ready to leave at quarter past three but I didn’t want to be an hour early so I made myself wait, then no Uber would connect - should’ve thought about that in advance, taxis on New Years and all - then the driver couldn’t find my flat somehow and then there was just so much traffic, so here we are now.”

Sighing, you let your hands drop in front of you and start fiddling with your fingers before you add, “If I could go back, I would've set off an hour in advance, I’m sorry.”

“Okay, take a breath.” Matty’s hands are still on your waist so he pulls you in to leave a kiss on your temple, “It’s fine, baby. Let’s go inside, yeah?” He pulls back to look at you and seeing the way your face lights up has him grinning brightly.

He takes a hold of your hand and intertwines your fingers to make your way into the restaurant. It doesn’t take more than a minute for someone to check your reservation and then walk you over to where you’re gonna be seated.

What has you surprised is the fact that the hostess walks you through the restaurant and takes you away from the crowd of people in the main area, you’re actually guided through wooden doors that have a small privé written in gold in the middle of it and behind the doors, there’s only a few people in the few tables that are scattered around the room.

It’s much fewer people compared to the main area, and you notice the tables are much far apart with pieces of furniture and wine displays in between so the chatter is quiet in the background but you’re not awkwardly alone in the restaurant.

The hostess points you to your table and you almost coo at the sight of the little candles in the middle of it. She asks you which drinks you’re having and after Matty replies with some kind of wine, he drags the chair out for you to sit.

You take your blazer off your shoulders first and hang it on the back of the chair, “Private table and all?” Your eyebrows are raised and there’s a smirk on your face as you sit and you watch him take his own seat in front of you, “Blowing me away already, Mr. Healy.”

He chuckles at your words and smirks right back at you, “Just wait until I blow you away later.”

You press your lips together in surprise, trying not to smile at hearing his antics in person and not through the screen or reading them on texts, “Starting that early, are we?”

His hand goes over the table to reach yours, softly holding it and giving it a tiny squeeze to say, “We started that days ago, baby.” and finishing off with a cheeky wink that has you biting your tongue not to react.

You’re honestly not sure how you’ll survive this date knowing how he can get and just how much every single one of his comments affect you.

You play dumb, shrugging your shoulders as you say, “I wonder who started it.”

Your words die in your mouth when he looks firmly into your eyes and replies, “You did. In your room, the night before you left.”

A few seconds of silence pass as you look at him with your mouth slightly open and he’s loving it, you can see it in the way his smirk just doesn’t seem to want to leave his face so you narrow your eyes at him as if that will do anything.

It only makes him laugh and you are about to complain about him taking the piss out of you when he lifts your hand up to give it a small kiss and then softly brings it back down on the table and starts rubbing little circles on the back of your hand.

Your eyes fall to your hands and then back up at him, you find him already giving you the sweetest smile and it makes you want to hide behind your free hand.

And he only makes it worse when he is fully silent for a little bit and all that you can see in his face is adoration as he stares at you. His eyes go from your face to what you’re wearing and he does it once more before you call him out on it.

“It’s rude to stare.” You’re smirking at him, but inside you’re just screaming at the way he’s making you feel under his burning gaze.

Your whole body feels like it’s on fire when he replies, “Sorry, just can’t stop looking at you. You look stunning baby, so beautiful.”

Trying to change it back to him, you compliment him too, “You don’t look too bad yourself.”

But it’s a failed mission for him to stop looking at every inch of you because he’s giving you another look and taking a deep breath as if you’ve just stolen all of his oxygen by just being there.

He can’t even comment on the black ribbon you have tied in a bow around your neck like a choker. His thoughts went into the gutter straight away when he saw that additional piece. Not to mention the leather, again.

“I mean…” He tries to gather his thoughts but he just can’t really be coherent, “And the leather pants too? Are you trying to kill me?”

You get a little shy then, having to look away for a second and you let a few giggles escape your lips since you can still feel his eyes on you.

“Well maybe I did it on purpose.” You play, barely able to look back at him.

Matty can only smile seeing you get this flustered in front of him, and he can’t believe he’s got you finally in front of him. “I’ll die a happy death then.”

You close your eyes, unable to look at him and not squeal. It makes you shake your head, the chokehold he has you on, and when you do it, you can hear him chuckle.

“What?” He asks, amused at your actions.

“Nothing.” You reply, gathering yourself and slowly opening your eyes but they quickly move to the door the staff seemed to go through, “Where’s that wine when I need it?”

It seems like you’re saved by the bell when a waiter comes through the door with the bottle Matty asked for and a corkscrew in his free hand. Your glass is the first to be poured and you say a small thank you as you watch Matty’s glass fill too. The waiter asks you both if you’ve had a nice day and your heart feels like it's about to burst when Matty says, “It's a lot better now.” and he looks over at you.

At this point, you just know that your cheeks are going to be burning for this whole meal. There’s no doubt your feelings are written all over your face, so you just pray he takes some pity on you and you’re not sitting in your flustered embarrassment on this date.

Both you and Matty discuss the food for a little while, both saying how good everything sounds before you eventually settle on what you’re having. After you both order your food when the waiter comes back over, your eyes end up on your hands that are now interlocked across the table and Matty keeps subtly running his thumb over your skin.

It baffles you for a second how you didn’t even notice the both of you were sitting like that when the waiter was taking your orders. You’re not used to any public displays of affection really anymore, but the way this all feels so natural to you right now is really heart warming.

There's that little seed of self sabotage that has you wanting to pull your hand away from his once you realise, but you push that to the back of your mind and let yourself be happy.

Giving his hand a squeeze, you start saying, “Can you believe it’s finally New Years Eve? We’re finally here?”

“It’s about time.” There’s absolutely nothing that can wipe the smiles off your faces, and you’re quite sure no one would be able to properly say who has the biggest grin on their face.

“I feel like I’ve been waiting ages.” You admit truthfully, still pinching yourself over the fact that the day has finally come and you’re sat across from him.

Matty hums in agreement, continuing to make his touch known on the back of your hand. “Was it just me that thought this past week dragged on?”

“No, it really did.” You nod as you also have thought the same thing, like it was a poor joke made by high powers.

“I feel like Christmas was about a month ago.” Matty chuckles, and it makes you remember what you have in your bag for him.

“Oh,” You sit up a little straighter, and you very reluctantly let go of Matty’s hand so you can get your bag, “I have something for you.”

He’s a bit taken aback, scolding himself for not bringing anything to give you on the date, “Oh no, what is it?”

But he breathes a bit better when you say, “Your belated Christmas present.”

The way you’re looking at him with glimmery eyes full of anticipation has him cooing at you internally, but he’s quick to remind you of his words in the past days when you’d mentioned this very situation happening, “Baby, I told you not to get me anything.”

“Yeah okay, I get that,” You hold your hands up a little in surrender but carry on regardless, “But these really screamed you and when I saw them I couldn’t not get them for you. They’re just a bit of fun, okay? Don’t tell me off.”

You hand him the little box that’s wrapped in red and white striped paper and when he gets it, he holds it to his chest, “You really didn’t have to.”

Scrunching your nose at him because you just think he’s so cute, you assure him it’s really not a problem, “It's still not enough but I’ll make up for it with your birthday.”

“Planning on sticking with me for that long?” Matty makes it seem like he’s all jokes about it, like it’s just teasing but the prospect of you actually wanting to stay for long has his heart beating out of his chest.

You get a bit shy when you know what you suggested means, so hiding a bit into yourself you answer with a question, “If you want me to?”

He settles you rather fast when he winks at you as he says, “As long as you want to, baby.”

You shyly nod the tiniest bit before you look at the unopened present in his hands and tell him, “Come on, open it. I want to see your reactions.”

His fingers swiftly pick at the tape that’s holding the paper together and once he takes it all off, he’s met with a little box of lighters which he can see have little messages written on them and just giving them a quick glance, he’s already smiling to himself.

“Oh, these are fun.”

Matty can’t help but grin seeing what all of these lighters say. Theres five in this pack you’ve got him, and they say, Fuck your nudes send me fitpics, I wonder if life smokes after it fucks me, and, Ash is our purest form. He can’t help but think, Come on baby light my fire, is very fitting but Matty’s ultimate favourite says, If you wanna fuck smile when you give me the lighter back.

“Do you like them?” You can’t help but ask.

Matty nods, glancing at you before looking back to the lighters, “I really do.”

You then watch your date take them out of the box they came in, and he tests one quickly, something that's just as common as writing your name first when you get a new pen, and he smiles when they work. And you’re glad they do.

But then Matty passes you one with his grin getting bigger and you don’t even have to look at it to know that its the one about smiling if you want to fuck. And whilst you do, you’d like to have this date first.

“No,” You shake your head, trying your best not to laugh at him, “Not right now.”

Matty can’t help but laugh at you trying to keep the grin off your face as you hand it back to him. He pretends he’s innocent when he asks, “Why?”

He doesn’t want to take it back from you, but you’re insistent when you offer it back to him, “It doesn’t count if you do it right now.”

Matty frowns a little at that, not taking it back from you just yet. Instead, he cackles, “Since when does this have rules?”

“Since I just established them.” You raise your eyebrows at him and hold it out to him.

Matty’s frown persists, “That’s unfair.”

“You’re not allowed until later.” You shake your head, trying not to laugh at this but you’re almost failing miserably.

“How much later are we talking?” Matty asks curiously with a cheeky smile on his lips as he takes the lighter off you.

“You’re insufferable.” You laugh a little as you shake your head.

Instead of letting that be it though, Matty grabs your hand and intertwines your fingers across the table again and as he does, he raises his eyebrows and grins, “Oh am I? Tell me more.”

“How does everything manage to fuel your ego?” You sigh, not stopping the smile from taking over your face.

You absolutely adore the way he instantly starts caressing your hand.

“You should know this by now baby.” Matty smiles, and hearing the nickname he has for you again makes your heart leap.

“Right.” You nod, knowing you should. But you try to warn him off making this date too overwhelming for you, “Remember, I know many other things… So stop teasing.”

Matty knows that you’re alluding to your pictures that he likes, but he can’t help trying to make you go all embarrassed. He lets his eyes glance down to what you’re wearing again before they run back up to your gorgeous eyes, and he cheekily grins, “Don’t need your Instagram when you look like this in front of me.”

You use your free hand to rub your eyes, taking a second for a deep breath before you look back up at him. His grin is huge but you're trying to be serious when you tell him off, “Stop because I’ll combust before the starters even come out.”

“That quick?” Matty chuckles.

You bite your tongue before raising your eyebrows to warn him, “I’ll make sure to remember that later.” and both of you start laughing.

When the starters arrive, you and Matty chat about your Christmases and your families. Discussing where the both of you fit into your family dynamics is quite funny, and the way Matty describes what his family is like and how he talks about them makes your heart warm.

Matty loves hearing your stories though. Your various anecdotes about this Christmas and ones earlier in your life have him giggling and it makes him long to make memories with you.

He also loves the way you talk about Amelia. It really seems like you value her just as much as he does the boys, and the love you both have for your friends is nothing but a green flag.

After your plates are taken away, you end up talking a bit about his US tour as he had a few more funny anecdotes he hadn’t told you yet. You have your questions for him, and Matty answers them all honestly with a smile on his face, he can’t help but find it cute how curious you are, not just for the stories but how you also check if he enjoyed what he was up to.

“You know what I think is a crime?” You ask just after a question about his tour, so Matty can’t help chuckle at the complete switch in direction of the conversation.

He asks, “What?”

“That you don’t sing This Must Be My Dream live.” You call him out on it because it’s something you think needs to be addressed, for your sake and everyone else who wants to hear it.

Matty bursts out laughing at that, making you start giggling as well as his laugh is just one of pure and utter joy. You could honestly listen to it forever.

When he calms down, he asks, “Is that your favourite?”

“Maybe on that album, but don't distract me,” You smile but shake your head, not letting him change the subject, “I want you to play it on the UK tour. Preferably a day I'm in the crowd.”

Matty chuckles at that, expecting nothing less. And despite the fact it’s not going to happen, he double checks, “London, Manchester, and Newcastle, right?”

This makes you grin, finally having the upperhand with something to tease him with for a second, “And you say I'm obsessed with you? You’ve remembered all the dates I’m coming to.”

And you take a successful sip of your wine as a mini celebration for getting that in there. Matty loves the smug look you give him, but he can’t help but ruin it and bring it back around on you.

“You say that like you haven't paid to see me perform.” Matty chuckles, taking a sip of his own wine before continuing, “Which you don’t need to do… You can sell the tickets or gift them to someone if you want. I’ll put you on the guestlist.”

“Damn,” You can’t help but grin hearing that, “This must be going well if I'm already guestlist approved.”

And you really think it is going well. There’s never been a moment of silence between you other than when you’re taking a second to compose yourself after he’s just been overly flirty with you. And even then it's both of you trying not to laugh at your reactions. You love how this date is going, and you’re pleased Matty thinks so too.

“Of course.” Matty nods, reaching over the table for your hand again which you happily give him.

It really reminds you of that bit on your first date where he said ‘we’re all a bit needy’ and you really relate to that especially today. You’re glad he wants to touch you, it feels so much nicer than any other date that you’ve been on in the past.

You feel genuinely wanted by him. And that in itself makes your heart beat so much faster for him.

Matty decides to allude to something interesting that he knows you don’t know about yet. “And those shows are going to be interesting ones anyway.”

Your eyes somehow get brighter when they go wide. You have to ask, “In what way?”

“I can’t spoil the surprise,” Matty shakes his head, his curls almost going in his eyes as he does, but he’s not giving you anything. “It’ll give you something to look forward to.”

You smile, “More like it gives me incentive to come home from LA.”

“Yeah.” Matty nods.

That certainly played a little part in why he didn't want to tell you anything. Because he genuinely wants you around him for as long as possible and using your love for the band could ensure that. But mostly because he really wanted it to be a nice surprise for you.

Even though he would have you backstage beforehand, so you’d probably end up guessing the surprise. But still, the thought of you even being there backstage fills Matty with so much joy he can imagine himself trying to keep you around for as long as possible.

“I can’t believe you’re not going to tell me more.” You press your lips together and look down pretending to be hurt by it.

Matty chuckles at that, and he gives your hand a squeeze before admitting, “I like to keep you guessing.”

“Yeah,” You nod, giggling a little knowing that he really does. “So is Belfast going to be special because I’m bringing Amelia along for that one for her birthday, don’t forget.”

Your date chuckles but nods, “I’m sure we can make it special in a different way to the rest.”

Cheekily, you hope, “By playing This Must Be My Dream?”

“No.” Matty shakes his head.

You push on, “Antichrist then?”

“Woman, I will-” Matty starts warning you but you interrupt him.

“You can play Woman, that's a great song.” You fire straight back, keeping your face neutral as you add, “Entirely fine by me.”

“You know,” Matty grins, “That's the first time since our chicken shop date that you’ve gone back into your character.”

And when he points it out, you realise that you have. You drop the harder expression and let yourself smile.

“Sorry,” You shake your head a little, looking down embarrassed as you didn’t even notice, “Sometimes I just slip into i-”

“Don’t apologise, it's what drew me to you in the first place.” Matty gives your hand a small squeeze, and when you look back up at him you see his big grin as he continues, “It just so happens I really like the way you can’t maintain that around me. I like seeing you flustered too much.”

“You can’t let me just have this date where it's just cute?” You narrow your eyes like you’re scolding him for it but your features soften when he gives you a little giggle in response.

Shaking his head and smirking at you, he replies, “No, I really love making you a hot mess.” And you’re about to scoff when he adds, “Emphasis on hot.” giving you another evident glace up and down.

He can tell that the sarcastic, “Right, thanks.” you let out is only a facade for your cheeks heat up and you purse your lips to try and not give him a reaction.

But he wants to break you, to see you flustered once more because he actually loves seeing the effect of his words shining through you and he’s sure he’d never get tired of it. “Though I would love to make an actual mess of you.”

Matty makes a subtle show of licking his lips and biting his bottom lip with his eyes stuck on yours. It all just makes you hold your breath and when you realise you’re doing that, he sees the way you let out a shaky breath only to take a deep one right away.

“You need to be stopped, we are in public. Quit the teasing.” You manage to say through your teeth, rolling your eyes but still giving him a little smirk.

Your thoughts were already going crazy and he doesn’t help at all, not when he looks like that, when he smirks at you like that and especially not when he says, “You don’t know the half of it baby. I’ll have you begging soon and that’ll only be the start.”

That comment only adds to all that’s running through your head and seeing the scenario playing inside your mind has your mouth opening agape as you let out a scoff. He’s the biggest menace but you secretly love the way your insides knot and feel like they’re burning up at his words and under his gaze.

The mains arrive a few minutes after and you thankfully manage to pick your jaw up off the ground. Both of you have a normal, none teasing, conversation whilst you're eating, between moaning at how good the food is.

Enjoying yourselves so much, you even do the cheesy ‘wanna taste of mine’ and after some raised suggestive eyebrows, you do end up sharing a fork full of your different mains.

There’s a nice ambiance to the restaurant and it’s all very pretty. There are a few other slightly bigger tables across the other side of the room that gives the place a nice atmosphere, but you’re thankful you still have your privacy as there are serving stations in between you.

You talk all about what’s coming for you both next year, the continuation of the ‘At Their Very Best’ tour has both of you excited and you share the same excitement when you tell him all about the content you’re getting at the very start of the year.

You’re booked and busy. Golden Globes, the Brit Awards, your and Amelia’s Valentines Day party, recording multiple ads with different brands and various events during London Fashion Week.

It’s all very surreal to you so you ramble a little about the ideas you have to record in those events and when you mention your TikTok soon being filled to the brim with funny bits, he very quickly remembers his favourite videos you’ve posted both there and on your Instagram.

“Your latest reel made me laugh.” Matty grins, remembering it fondly.

He found your videos on Instagram and TikTok quite amusing and he found them not long after the NME Awards where you first met.

Despite being best friends, you and Amelia were quite different, especially when it came to your personal social media output. Amelia tends to keep up with the new music trends and the viral dances that come with it, and you take a very different approach to your best friend.

You’ve become known for taking the piss out of Amelia learning and practising those dances and then the camera flicks to you and of you trying and failing not to laugh. It started off with you having enough of whatever the new song was as you were forced to listen to it on repeat as she tried to learn the dances.

It left you bored or completely over it and when the camera flicked back to you from your best friend, people found it hilarious. Matty found it hilarious. And your last video could quite possibly be his favourite.

“Oh,” You chuckle at the memory, “The one where she stopped and told me off?”

Matty nods, already giggling as he remembers it, “When she threw that pillow at you, I laughed so loud.”

Your eyes go wide and you pretend you’re hurt, “Wow.”

“It was how shocked you were about it.” Matty giggles, replaying it in his mind as he grins at you, “And then you threw it back when she was dancing again and she fucking went for you and the video cut out. It was brilliant, something I would do to Hann.”

“I’m glad you find them amusing.” You smile, “Most of the time it’s the only way I can get through the time where we’re stuck together and she starts making the videos. It's the song playing over on repeat when I forget to bring my AirPods with me that kills me off. Rookie mistake on my part.”

Matty chuckles, “You never want to get up and do it with her?”

Instantly, you shake your head, “Not to shit songs like the ones that go viral.”

He frowns at you, knowing one of his songs has been quite popular in that app, “You calling About You shit?”

It’s a wonder why he even asked that when he has seen just how much you love that song.

“Clearly not, but you didn’t make a shitty dance to that song, did you?” You raise your eyebrows to make him understand your point.

He shrugs softly, understanding what you mean, “No, just to Oh Caroline.”

You scoff out a laugh, not believing he’s just said that. “That dance is far from shit.”

“You’d dance to that one then?” His eyebrow raises as if he’s challenging you to say yes.

“Yeah and I have.” You easily admit, you loved that dance so much so it hadn’t been a burden learning it.

“What?” He asks all smiles, trying to picture you dancing to it.

And you smile back at him as you explain, “Amelia asked me to learn it with her. And because I like the song, I reluctantly agreed.”

Matty loves this new piece of information so he fully states, “Now you’ve got to do the dance with me.”

But you quickly turn him down because you know you’d get so nervous dancing it with him that you’d end up messing up, and he also was a good dancer so you knew you weren’t going to live up to his expectations. “I’ll save myself the embarrassment and stick to dancing with Amelia.”

He pouts exaggeratedly, doing his best puppy eyes at you, “Who am I gonna dance with then?”

You only give him a fake pout back, sarcasm in every word you say next, “I’m sure you’ll manage to find someone, you always do.”

In a fraction of a second, his expression switches to a shit-eating grin and he takes your comment as an opportunity to tease you, “Is that a little green I see in your eyes?” His eyes narrow like that’s gonna make you admit you’re jealous.

“No.” You reply meekly, cutting his advances to get another reaction from you.

He’s not quite done yet though, so he brings back a moment to refresh your memory, “Remember when you kissed Amelia and put it on Instagram because you were jealous?”

“Oh yeah,” You nod, and after you’ve taken a sip of your wine, you fire right back at him, “Remember when you did the same when you kissed Ross the night after?”

Matty just smirks, “Bet you were jealous of that too.”

“Jealous of you, yeah.” You nod, knowing just how much it subtly enrages him.

Matty scoffs, “We’re on a date.”

You raise your eyebrows, challenging him, “And you’re bringing up me being jealous.”

“I like to tease you.” He reminds you with a cheeky smile, really trying to act like he’s all innocent and doesn’t have any other intentions.

“Yeah I know you do.” You giggle a bit and shake your head, fighting a smile breaking out on your face. “Trying to make me go crazy before the day is done.”

He loves how you’re trying to scold him for it but you’re failing miserably at keeping a stoic expression, so he points out the truth that’s written all over your face, “You love it really.”

“Mhhh.” You hum, not giving him an answer. “I think you love doing it just as much.”

“Oh definitely,” He assures with an enthusiastic nod of his head, “I’m dying to get my hands on you.”

You let out a chuckle at his bluntness, “I bet you are.” You say it in a way that seems uninterested but he knows you’re forcing it so he can’t fully see it on your face that you want it too.

“You act like you’re not thinking the exact same.” Matty calls you out straight away, “Or do I need to remind you of your texts?”

You bite your tongue and stay silent for a long couple of seconds before you can finally admit why you’re holding back. “Maybe I’d agree if we weren’t in public and you’re not trying to tease.”

He makes sure to joke about so that you get a bit more comfortable but completely understanding where you’re coming from. “You knew what you were getting into when you agreed to the date.”

“Maybe I just can’t refuse a date when one is offered?” You offer as a reason even though you’ve never been more thankful to be sitting across from someone.

Rolling his eyes playfully, he asks with sudden curiosity sparking, “Has there been any other dates with anyone you’ve been on your chicken shop dates with that you wanted a second date with?”

“Oh yeah, loads of people.” You nod enthusiastically, “Me and Amelia talk about them all the time.”

Only letting out a small, “Oh.” he keeps quiet to encourage you to continue and he’s actually intrigued now because of how fast your answer was.

Making a rundown through the memories of your chats with Amelia about this exact topic, you take a small breath before starting your list. “So I want a second date with Yungblud.”

Matty pulls a face at that name, and “Why?” immediately falls from his lips.

But you ignore him and just continue name dropping, “And I want my one with Charli… And I guess KSI, Jade from Little Mix, Bimini was a fave, Finneas too.” And the more names you list, the further Matty’s face falls. “I’m doing one with Kehlani too and I’m excited for that, and I would so go out with Phoebe again. I thought me and her made a great couple.”

“Okay,” Matty raises his finger to stop you for a moment and he says, “I thought you were just going to say one, not list your phone book.”

“Aw, are we getting a little jealous?” You pout, teasing him.

He doesn’t let a single second go by when he replies with a stern “No.”

“Oh,” You grin, knowing you have the upper hand now, “I think you are.”

When you don’t get one word from him, only that blank stare of his, you take it a bit further, “You wanna be my one and only Matty?”

It certainly reaches his ears in such a teasing tone but he genuinely answers it with, “Yeah, I do.”

That makes you melt inside, seeing the soft smile that tugs at the corner of his lips when you just keep looking at him has you needing to reassure him of it all now and remind him just how special this whole situation with him really is.

“Well I haven’t been on a second date with anyone else.” You start, your eyes solely focused on him and a growing grin on your face, “Only ever had one in my flat.” Your hand reaches out to grab his and when you do, you squeeze it as you say, “Only one has slept in my bed.”

A few beats of silence pass, both of you are stuck staring at each other and the touch of your skin setting both of you up alive. Matty licks his lips and replies, “Lucky them.”

If he wasn’t so focused on every one of your movements, he could’ve missed the little shake of your head you give him before correcting him, “Lucky you.”

You fill up with pride when you see his cheeks get a little pink and he breaks eye contact, getting too flustered under your gaze, so you take the opportunity to tease him. “Jealousy looks good on you.”

And this becomes yet again one of those instances you are reminded to not mess with him because he knows just what to say back so your teasing ends up biting you back, “You know what else would look good on me?”

“What?” You naively inquire back.

“You.” He simply responds, “Preferably with nothing on, riding me how you were going to the other night.”

He can feel the way you freeze across from him, even your breath getting caught in your throat and it’s like you have forgotten how to function after that. So to make it even worse for you, and for him to get an even better reaction, he continues to run his dirty mouth.

“Or would you prefer me on top of you?” Matty leans closer so he can drop his voice and ask you in a low voice, “Your legs wrapped tight around my waist, I can kiss and tease that pretty neck of yours until you're begging for me to put my hands to better use than holding yours above your head.”

Matty’s lip twitches up into the beginning of a smirk when he sees the way that has affected you. He can’t help but ask, “You like that baby?”

You nod aimlessly, you’re looking straight at him but you’re not really processing him. Instead you’re picturing that exact scenario he’s describing in your head and how desperate you actually are for it.

And you’re lost for what feels like a long few minutes when in reality it’s ten seconds of barely breathing as you repeat his words in your head and love the feeling of him still gently caressing your skin from across the table as if he’s not just talked about fucking you into a mattress.

But it’s like you’re jolted out of that fantasy when the waiter comes back over and politely asks, “Would you like to order any desserts?”

Matty glances at you, prompting you to speak first as if he hasn't just given you a mini stroke.

“I-” You stutter as you look from Matty down to your menu, but nothing sounds as good as what you were just offered. So you pick up the piece of paper and hand it back to the waiter with a small smile, “I’m good, thank you.”

“You sure?” Matty double checks, not wanting this date to be over just yet.

“Yeah.” You nod, and Matty realises exactly why you’ve declined when you add, “Might have something at home later.”

So without question, Matty agrees and does the same thing.

“I'm also alright, thank you.” He hands the menu back and with the mutual understanding that has just passed between you in just that glance, Matty asks, “Can we have the bill please?”

“Course.” The waiter nods and wonders back off over to the bar.

Matty is pulling his wallet out of his inside blazer pocket when he catches you lifting your bag up and he knows what you’re about to do so he instantly stops you, “Put your bag down.”

“But I-”

“No,” Matty interrupts, being serious when he says, “I asked you out, I’m paying.”

“Okay then,” You agree, because if you don’t you’ll argue over it for hours. Instead, you tell him, “But I’m paying next time.”

Matty’s grin is instant. He raises his eyebrows at you, smirking slightly, “Next time?”

You hum a little, and you play on it a little, “Depending on how your performance tonight goes, I reckon I’d go out with you again.”

As if you wouldn’t feel like the luckiest woman alive to go on another date with him.

“Okay,” Matty stands up, “He’s not fast enough, I’m going to go pay.”

You can’t help the laugh that falls from your lips, along with, “Eager much?”

Matty leans down and whispers, “For you, very.” before he very quickly presses a kiss to your neck and he walks off over to the bar to pay.

You take a minute to control the way your cheeks start burning, and you look down to compose yourself as you take a deep breath.

Your mind is echoing with a chorus of what the fuck? and the pure disbelief seems to be stuck with you and not wanting to leave. It’s a weird feeling that overcomes you as you are impatient and time seems to be going far too slow now but, at the same time, you’re feeling like there’s not enough time for you to get your wits about.

When Matty comes back over, you’ve just put your blazer back on and he takes your hand and helps you stand. He then grabs his blazer and puts it on, making sure your presents are still in his pocket before he intertwines your fingers and you both make your way out.

As you leave, you both thank the waiter for serving you and they wish you both a happy new year and you say the same back. When you get outside, it's no surprise to you that Matty pulls out his pack of cigarettes, it's certainly been a few hours since he last had one.

It had started raining since you were last outside and it's still coming down now, but neither of you mind too much. Matty pulls you out into the rain again, which has you giggling because it's all too like the end of your first date.

“Remember when you told me to live a little and stand in the rain with you?” You giggle, wrapping your arms around his neck as the rain falls on you both.

“I remember getting you all wet, yeah.” Matty grins, his hands on your hips pulling you flush against him now you’re in your own company again. But of course, he has to keep you on your toes, he leans in and quietly says, “Believe I can do it again, bit better this time.”

You bite your lip and you scrunch your face up and look down so he can’t fully see how much he affects you. Inside you're silently screaming and you playfully push against his chest, but Matty keeps you close.

He giggles, not letting you go at all, and he teases, “I fucking love teasing you.”

“Yeah I know.” You shake your head, trying your best to keep some composure when you look back up at him.

Matty can’t help but laugh at your reaction, but then he notices the rain again and he starts moving the both of you back towards the side of the restaurant as the taxi he ordered clearly isn’t here yet, “Come on, let's get you out of the rain.”

“I-” You’re about to tell him that you don’t mind, that it’s just a bit of rain. But then Matty moves you against the wall of the restaurant and he stands flush against you, practically pushing you against the wall as he’s trying to shield you from the rain. A surprised, “Oh?” leaves your lips as you smirk at the entire situation.

Matty tries not to show how much he likes you reacting to him, this time he instead takes his cigarettes out of his blazer pocket and lights up his own before he offers you one, “Do you want a cig?”

You nod, “Please.” and he offers you the pack and lighter.

After you’ve lit it, the first drag somehow calms you down a little, and you both find yourselves subtly glancing at the other like you’re not practically pressed against each other and you’ve not just been on a date.

A minute passes that's filled with noises of traffic, the relief that smoking gives you, and longing looks at each other. But when the rain starts falling a little heavier and the wind picks up, it hits the side of your faces making you scrunch your features and laugh.

Both of you wipe the water away, and Matty takes a drag of his now nearly finished cigarettes saying, "You know what we really need right now?"

"Funnily enough, I do." You nod, remembering what you brought with you and Matty watches as you reach into your bag and pull out his umbrella that he gave you after your first date.

As Matty smiles at you, you hand it back as you remind him, "Promised you'd have it back for New Years." and he laughs and takes it from you.

“Why didn't you give it me a few minutes ago?” Matty asks, putting it up immediately and standing closer to you so he can cocoon you both against the wall and away from the rain. He tuts, “You let me get all wet."

"And give up you pressing me into a wall? I don’t think so." You grin as you raise your eyebrows at him, and his smirk has you wanting to melt right then and there.

Whilst the confidence is bubbling inside you, before you back out of it, you say what you’ve been thinking for your whole date. “You look good by the way.” You say as you take the last drag of your cigarette before you throw the stub to the ground.

“Thank you,” Matty smiles, standing a bit taller at the fact you approve of his attire. “I did dress for the occasion this time.”

“Mmmh,” You hum, trying not to smile as you pretend to scold him, “Couldn’t finish it off and do the tie for me though?”

Matty smiles at you taking a hold of either end of his undone bowtie then, but instead of teasing you, he admits as he takes another drag, “Not through the lack of trying.”

“Awh,” You coo, grinning at him in a way that makes his chest ache, “Did you make an effort for me?”

Matty nods, “I tried my best.”

You hum, your eyes going from his back down to his white shirt with the top button undone and the loose tie that you have a hold of. You want nothing more than to tug on it and pull him into a kiss, but you refrain for a moment more before you look back up at him just after you whisper loud enough for him to hear, “One less thing to take off you I guess.”

At that you feel his free hand grip on your waist that little bit tighter and when he sees you run your tongue over your lips, wetting them that little bit more that somehow makes them even more enticing, he’s seconds away from smashing his lips against yours. The only thing that stops him is the little, “Oh.” of realisation that you let out.

His eyes find yours again as you offer him back his lighter with a knowing smile and a, “Here you go.” And it’s when he takes it from you, you see the wave of realisation take over his face and he grins at you seeing that he had accidentally handed you the lighter that had ‘if you want to fuck smile when you hand me the lighter back’ on it. And you’re smile is fucking huge.

Pocketing the lighter, Matty looks back into your eyes and raises his eyebrows at you, like he’s checking your earlier rules. You just give him a cheeky smirk and eyebrow raise which screams that you’re very much on board with the idea.

“Please let me take you home.” Matty pleads as he presses you into the wall a little more, his hand finding your hip again wanting to hold you.

Trying your best to refrain from kissing him just a second longer, but you’re only human. All you can do is nod before you pull on both ends of his undone tie and his lips crash against yours.

You’ve waited so long to feel this again and the way your heart rapidly beats in your chest as he freely moans against your lips has your head spinning. He tastes like the red wine you’ve both just been drinking, and it makes you pull that bit more on his tie so he can’t escape you.

You feel Matty’s free hand move from your hip to cup your jaw, tilting it up and he holds you there firmly, not wanting this kiss to end. It’s been a long fucking week and he’s been dreaming of kissing you again, among other things.

Wishing time would stop for you is clearly not enough because after a long minute of giving into what you’ve both craved for so long, you’re interrupted. Both of you pull away when you hear Matty’s phone ringing, and there’s a buzz to you both. The air between you is charged and you don’t for a second think that is going to change until you get somewhere private.

“Taxi’s here,” Matty announces, and immediately he takes your hand and says, “Come on.”

You silently giggle and follow him to the car, and he protects you with the umbrella as you move instead of himself. You can’t stop smiling at the way he opens the door for you and you get in with a small embarrassed smile and a little shake of your head. But you shouldn't be surprised when he slides in next to you, making you sit in the middle.

As you’re putting your seatbelts on, the taxi driver greets you, asking how you are and once you both tell him that you’re good, he double checks the address you’re going to, but what surprises you is that he reads out your address that Matty must have already put into the app. You’re about to correct him, but the curly haired man beside you confirms and says, “Yeah, that's great mate. Thanks.”

And with that the driver is off, but you’re left to glance at Matty curiously, and when he meets your gaze, you ask him, “I thought we were going back to yours before George’s?”

“It's too far away.” Matty shakes his head before leaning closer to say a little quieter, “Think we’ve both waited long enough, don’t you?”

The look in both of your eyes screams sin. And something in you bubbles with nerves but overall excitement.

You nod, a little short of breath but you don’t think Matty notices that, but he does steal a quick but longing kiss before you part and try to calm yourselves down. And as your date starts politely conversing with the taxi driver, asking how long he’s on for tonight and if he minds how busy it's going to be, you have a quiet moment to yourself where you let your reality sink in.

You’re about to have sex with Matty Healy.

You should know that the curly haired man can’t stop his teasing for the journey back to yours. No, you’re sure he insists on being a tease to slowly drive you insane as to what's about to happen.

At first you think it’s nothing but him being touchy with you, him once again showing his affection towards you through simple touches to the top of your thigh. You half think its because he likes the tight leather pants you have on too, but it soon becomes clear what his intentions actually are when his fingers slip to the inside of your thigh.

Immediately, you hold your breath and you can’t not watch what he’s doing, as it somehow makes his touch even more agonising. The leather does nothing to minimise his touch, and when his fingers run along the seam of the pants you feel yourself go a bit dizzy.

If his touch feels this good now, you can’t imagine how intense it’s going to be when there is no restricting material between you. And you can’t fucking wait for it, but here in this taxi his touch feels a little dangerous, something the both of you know you shouldn’t be doing, but that somehow makes it even more exhilarating.

Matty can see the way you’re watching him, and he can’t help but smile as you’re doing absolutely nothing to stop him. He fucking loves the way he can see your breathing gets a little more laboured and he can practically hear the thoughts running around your mind because they are the exact same as his own.

When you’re a few minutes away, you can’t handle Matty’s teasing anymore, so instead you trap his hand on your thigh by crossing your legs, making it so he can’t move it anymore but he’s still holding you. The way you can feel his smirk when you do that, and you can feel it as if his stare alone is making your cheeks burn.

“Tease.” You mutter under your breath.

And you can hear his smile as he leans closer and whispers, “You’ve seen nothing yet baby.”

“Neither have you.” You try to maintain your strength.

“We’ll see.” Matty backchats.

You quietly hum in response to that but let your fingertips do the same that he was doing to the top of your thigh. You trace patterns near his knee, and from your peripherals you can see your date is about to say something, but because he’d already been so chatty, the driver asks him another question about your plans for the evening. As Matty is telling him about the party you’re going to later, you continue to tease, not letting him win like he was trying to.

As he gets a little more into the conversation, you move your fingers from running up and down the top of his thigh to the inside of it and you let them reach higher up his leg. You just about see his head whip around to look at you, but you ignore him and continue.

You move back down his thigh as the driver is talking, but as soon as Matty is chatting again, your back up near his crotch and you feel the hand on your thigh tighten, like he needs to hold something so he doesn’t completely fall apart at your teasing. But that’s how you know you’ve got him right in the palm of your hand, and whilst you still have some power left, you use it to your advantage.

Doing the same thing again, waiting this time until he’s just about done talking, you move your hand right up the inside of his thigh until you grab his crotch and keep pressure on it. You can feel how hard he’s getting beneath your palm and the sharp intake of breath as he stutters to the end of his sentence has you having to press your lips together and dip your head to maintain your innocence.

The driver must start talking again but neither of you pay attention to it as Matty’s lips are against your ear in a second and he whispers, “You’re playing a dangerous game baby.”

“Think you’re enjoying it.” You whisper back and you gently but firmly squeeze just to tease him that extra bit as the car pulls over and you’re finally back at your flat.

Rushed pleasantries are exchanged with the driver, all wishing each other a happy new year before you and Matty scramble out of the car. Matty even being a gentleman and grabbing your hand to help you out before thanking the driver again and shutting the door.

Walking up to your building, you stand at the door and try to unlock it as fast as you can, but you’re letting your pent up emotions get the better of you. And it gets worse when Matty comes to stand behind you, it just makes your flustered mind even worse.

You feel Matty’s hands on your hips, but the way he then presses himself against your arse and you can feel just how hard he is now he’s standing up has your mind sinking further and further into the gutter. “You’re such a fucking tease baby.” Matty says in a low voice, as he waits for you to open the door, and he leaves a teasing kiss on the back of your neck after he brushes your hair away.

“Get used to it.” You tell him, trying not to care if you think he can see your shaky hands, you unlock the door a few seconds later and the both of you head inside. Matty playfully slaps your arse as you both head up the stairs which has you both laughing as you practically race to your floor.

You’ve never been so thankful not to live too many floors up because you can feel the energy between you now and it’s electric. You need to be inside your flat, you need his hands on you, his lips on yours. You just need him.

Once inside your flat, both of you are on each other immediately. As soon as the door is shut and locked, Matty’s lips find your own and you’ve been pushed up against your door.

Groaning into the kiss, Matty can’t keep his hands to himself. One of his hands is quick to get a hold of your waist to keep you flush against him as if there was a way for you not to be, you’re trapped between your door and him so the feeling of his fingers clutching at you makes you even needier.

His other hand cups your jaw firmly, his thumb pressed on your cheek and it seems to stay there for a while, that is until he pushes his hips into yours and you can’t help the whimper falling from your lips. That ends up with his hand slowly going down and wrapping his fingers around your neck, applying a delicious pressure that has your head spinning.

The only thing going through your head now is how badly you need him closer, and if you weren’t so overcome with lust, you’d laugh at yourself since there’s really not more space between you but it certainly feels like he isn’t close enough.

Instead of tugging him closer by his tie, you decide to move things along and push his blazer back off his shoulders. Seeing where this is going, Matty lets the material fall from him and he pulls you towards him as he moves you both further into your flat.

Your hands are cupping his face, keeping him in the kiss, making it difficult when Matty starts to push your blazer off of you too. Letting one arm loose at a time, still clutching him with your other, you let him take the blazer off you as you both blindly stumble towards your bedroom.

Just after it hits the floor, you hear Matty kick your bedroom door open and you both can’t help but giggle at the loud thud and the door almost bouncing back and hitting you. Not letting that distract you though, you kiss him again this time walking him further back into your room towards your bed.

As soon as Matty feels the mattress behind his knees, he sits down on it, keeping you in the hot and needy kiss as you come to straddle him. Both you and Matty moan when he pulls your hips down onto his, and you’re overcome with sinful thoughts when you feel how hard he is.

Thankfully, this is the time and the place to let all of these fantasies become reality. Like you did last week, you push on Matty’s chest and he falls onto his back with a groan and you give yourself a second to smirk down at him.

Just to tease, as you lean down over him, you roll your hips on top of his causing a delightful friction between you that has you holding in a moan and Matty freely gasping before he clutches your hips so he can encourage you more.

One of your hands runs slowly down his chest and your fingers deftly undo the few buttons that were keeping his shirt closed. You leave a trail of fire on his skin as your fingertips ghost over every inch of his chest, and when you reach his We Are Kings tattoo, you make sure to give it a bit more attention.

Matty grows breathless, unable to continue kissing you and it just has you smirking, lips still hovering over his.

A shaky breath he takes encourages you to teasingly trace the band of his boxers that are peeking through the top of his pants. The way he throws his head back slightly and closes his eyes harder is then permanently engraved in your mind.

His mouth is further up now that he’s moved, so you leave a peck on his chin and start making your way down his neck, leaving open mouthed kisses in your wake. That is until you reach a spot at the bottom of his neck that has him shuddering when your lips find it, and after that reaction you can’t hold yourself back from encouraging more out of him.

Pride fills you completely when you get a string of soft moans as you lick and suck on the particular place on his neck and you’re certain you won’t let up on it until his fingers tangle in your hair and he lets out a choked, “Fuck baby, c’mere.”

The husky tone of his voice has you aching between your legs and you just can’t not obey when he sounds like that.

You see his blown out pupils for a fraction of a second when he’s pulled you back up to face him but then he’s crashing his lips against yours and it’s a hungry kiss, so desperate you know your lips will be swollen but somehow that notion only gets you going even more.

The whimper you let out as you kiss him has Matty knowing you’re enjoying yourself, but he wants more. Before he can even think about it though, you distract him again. Your hand finds home around his throat, tightening to keep him in the kiss you’re sharing and it makes Matty’s body feel like he’s being set alight.

You feel the vibration of the moan he lets out under your hand and it makes you smile in the kiss, breaking it from the immense satisfaction from both what you’re doing and his reactions.

But he’s desperate to keep his lips on yours so he doesn’t waste a second to kiss down your jaw, kissing every bit of your neck he can reach.

Your breathing becomes more agitated when he gives your neck attention, that combined with the incessant rocking of your hips has your senses going out of control.

Matty brings one of his hands up and, with every passing second, it gets closer to your chest. The moment he starts groping one of your breasts and pinches your nipple over your bralette, you let out a stuttering moan.

The sound only encourages him to continue and you’re enjoying it far too much, so much so that you have to think of a way to make him stop because you know that if he keeps it up then this isn’t going to last long. And you want to elongate this as much as you can – fuck wherever you need to be afterwards, you don’t care about being late right now.

So your hands clasp around his wrists and lift them up and over his head, fingers keeping his hands on the bed and away from being able to touch you.

His eyes narrow, like he’s challenging you to actually go through with your actions and since you have no plan on giving up on them, you smirk down at him feeling every bit of power having him under you at what seems completely your mercy.

The motion of your hips becomes more intently then, keeping the pace you had but being more mindful of every sway. Matty has a half mind to give you a bit of time to soak up the feeling of power but he grows impatient and even if he likes seeing you on top of him, taking it all into your hands, he’s been quite literally dreaming of having you unravel beneath him for so long and there’s no more time he can wait for it to happen.

In a swift movement, he manages to break free from your hold and wraps his arm around your waist to flip you both over. It’s like you’ve just blinked and you’re now under him. You would complain any other time but this is now happening and you’re not doing a thing to stop it.

“Okay, you’ve had your fun baby,” Matty grins, looking down at your shocked expression, “My turn.”

Your stomach fills with anticipation hearing that, and it’s like Matty knows because half a second later you’re trapped in a searing kiss. Your fingers instantly find his hair and you can’t stop yourself from tugging on it, wanting him as close as possible.

It’s difficult to keep track of time in moments like this. It could be a minute or it could be 15 that go by as Matty teases you. His hands start exploring your body as you're happily trapped kissing him.

With the hand that’s not keeping him propped up, he lets it travel down your side, his touch leaving a hot trail of goosebumps erupting on your skin. You moan when your breasts get some more attention, him teasing you through your bralette and the curly haired man can’t help but want to hear more of your sweet sounds.

When his lips begin to trail down your jaw and neck, his hand gets lower too, moving from your tits down to your arse where he takes a handful of it and he pulls you towards him. That has you moaning because his knee is pressed directly between your legs and the friction, along with his lips now attacking to top of your breasts, has you dazed in pleasure.

There’s no way you won’t have some bruises from the intensity at which he kisses and grabs you, but you wouldn’t change anything about the situation you’re in. And Matty can tell by the way you’re moaning and tugging on his hair encouraging him that you’re enjoying yourself.

Matty absolutely loves the way you don’t even try to hold back your pleasured whines as he teases your neck with kisses. The only place he misses is where that ribbon choker of yours is tied around your neck, he wants to keep that on as long as possible so he moves the longer ends to the other side of your neck.

It’s when his lips find yours again that you lose track of time. To be honest, you wish you could stop time and keep the both of you like this forever with your hearts racing, lips getting even more swollen from the intensity of your kisses. You’d die a happy woman, but after a while it gets to the point where you need more.

With him lent forwards over you, kissing you with just as much intensity as when you started, you keep on finding your hips bucking up into him as your clit is getting the friction from you moving against his thigh. And the whines that you’re letting out that Matty swallows when his lips are against your own have him getting harder at the sound.

You need more, and he wants to give you more. So he lets his hand trail back down your body until he teases you by tracing the waistband of your pants. Only then does Matty break your kiss so he can look at you when he quietly asks, “Can I take these off you, baby?”

A small whine escapes your lips and nodding eagerly, you reply, “Please.”

His fingers very quickly undo the button and tug the zip down, and when that’s done you make sure to lift your hips up so it’s easier for him to peel the pants off you but when he goes to do that, they don’t seem to want to move.

Matty tries once more but they don’t budge, you’re about to let out a cry of frustration but his giggles reach your ears and a smile appears on your face.

“Looks like we need to stand up for this.” He looks so amused by the situation, it certainly rubs off on you and you’re both trying to hold back your laughs as you stand up and go to try again.

“Fucks sake,” You are cursing under your breath, chest heaving as you both try to pull down your leather pants but struggling with them going past your hips. “Maybe leather pants weren't the best move.” You let out a giggle, wiggling your way out of them.

“Oh no they were.” Matty shakes his head, immediately disagreeing with your joke. “They are so worth the trouble baby.”

Once he manages to pull them down further, by the time it gets to your mid thigh, the pants end up falling down on their own and pooling around your ankles. Your heels are quickly toed off then, your pants going somewhere behind you along with the shoes.

You’re so ready to resume things when he adds, “Though I prefer you without them.” And that’s enough to earn him a laugh, but he’s serious and he lets you know despite letting out a little giggle to match yours. “Look at you.” He says with his hands on your hips, his gaze going up and down your figure and he’s completely taken aback by how fucking beautiful you look even when you seem to be getting a little shy.

But you’re standing there only in your bralette, your black lace underwear and your ribbon choker tied around your neck, and the singer cannot believe his luck. There’s nothing more he wants than you, in any way you’ll let him have you.

The way he’s looking at you makes you so warm inside, feeling entirely comfortable with him despite what should have been a really awkward moment, he made it feel normal and made you feel safe with him. You cup both of his cheeks when you lean in to kiss him again and Matty’s hands wrap around your waist, pulling you back into him.

You direct him back to the bed, and Matty sits back on the side of it and you don’t hesitate to straddle him again. Matty has no issues with this at all, he takes full advantage of the situation and his hands grab your arse, squeezing it as he kisses you making you chuckle into your kiss.

As intensity builds between you again, Matty feels you lean forward into him clearly trying to encourage him to fall backwards, but he’s not having that. Instead he uses his grip that he has of you to quickly stand up with you in his arms before he moves the both of you properly onto your bed, with you beneath him how he wants.

“Nice try baby.” Matty shakes his head, and you giggle before he captures your lips again with his.

The both of you settle yourselves and you’re kissing for a while when Matty’s hips start grinding into yours and with how hard he is, your mind is reeling. You need more. And with your broken whines that he silences, Matty knows what you’re after already so he lets his hands trail down your body again.

When his finger hooks into the top of your underwear, you know what he's about to ask, so instead of him having to, you nod into your kiss and give an encouraging tug on his curls.

You thought he was going to pull them off you, but instead Matty trails his fingers down the line where your underwear meets the top of your thigh down to where you’re aching for him. He can feel how wet you are through the lace and it makes him groan into your kiss. But the way you gasp when he moves your underwear to the side and his fingers finally make contact with where you’re throbbing for him has you choking on air.

The teasing circles Matty starts leaving on your clit makes you break your kiss and you moan into your bedroom. Your reaction has the curly haired man smirking, fucking loving the way you react to him.

Matty kisses your neck when he lets his fingers tease your entrance, and the way you moan loudly when his fingers dip inside you has Matty having to bite his tongue so he doesn’t cum his pants there and then. You sound fucking heavenly and the fact Matty is drawing those sounds from you has him desperate to hear more.

Before he lets you get fully used to the sensation, he draws his fingers back up bringing your wetness up to your clit so he can carry on teasing you. This time he adds more pressure and with the way he sees your hips moving against his digits, he takes it as a cue to let you get yourself off on his hand.

Driven by the need of reaching your orgasm your hips grow erratic as his fingers are still pressing on your clit. Your face is scrunched up in pleasure, but when you open your eyes to look down where his hand is, you find him looking down at you with his mouth agape.

Little gasps leave his lips as your wetness coats his hand and you can see it written on his face how much this is sending him into overdrive but you need him inside you again, you’re getting so close to your climax that you’re growing desperate for him to resume what he was doing a minute ago.

So you bring one of your hands down to hold his wrist and, though it frustrates you for a second to have his fingers leave your clit, you guide his fingers back to your entrance.

You haven’t broken eye contact and that might be the one thing that makes him give into your wishes. He’s come to find out there’s nothing he can deny you when you’re staring straight into his eyes.

When his fingers sink back inside you, deeper this time, and his palm cups your clit, your whines and moans encourage him to continue.

“Matty - fuck, please.” And with the way you’re almost clawing through his shirt at his back, Matty isn’t one to argue with what you want.

He starts fucking you with his fingers, and he quickly gets to know what you like. You’re beyond easy to read and he loves that you aren’t holding anything back from him. He loves your whines, gasps, and moans. He’s thankful he can hear them over how loud he can hear his own heartbeat.

With all the teasing and the relentless rhythm of his fingers, it doesn’t take long for you to feel the familiar ache of your orgasm building.

Matty can feel and see how close you are. His eyes rarely leave your face, noting and memorising the way your muscles strain and the way you look when he does something he now knows you like, all bringing you towards your climax. But he uses that to his advantage, when he can tell you’re almost there, with one more curl of his fingers, Matty withdraws them completely.

“No,” You can’t help but let out a small whine at being left with nothing when you were mere seconds away from an orgasm.

But Matty doesn’t listen to your complaints. Instead, he draws his hand up from between your legs and as his brown eyes stare into yours, he instructs, “Open your mouth.”

You do as you’re told, your mind is too dopamine induced to argue, and you follow his instructions without question. You know what's coming anyway, and you’ll happily suck his fingers clean and make a show of it for him.

But that’s where you’re wrong. Instead, Matty surprises you by sucking his own fingers clean and you’re just watching him above you in awe. The way he moans at the taste of you has you staring at him and if your mouth wasn’t already open, it definitely would have fallen like that. He looks so fucking hot.

And when his eyes open, the lust he’s feeling is clear to see. But your heart stops when he withdraws his fingers and grabs your jaw, holding it open further and Matty leans down a little and spits into your mouth.

How your eyes don’t roll back in pleasure, you don’t know. You hum as you close your mouth and swallow, your hips roll in a subconscious effort to alleviate the ache between your legs but his thigh is a bit too far down for you to even get a hint of friction which makes you let out a loud whine.

“Good girl.” Matty smirks down at you, but before he can look too smug about the way you reacted you grab him with both your hands and pull him down into another heated kiss.

Your skin feels like it’s on fire now, and getting off with him is only making your need for release more urgent. Your brain continues to get more hazy with every single thing he does and the only coherent thought you can make out is the fact that you need him completely.

“Matty please,” If you weren’t so far gone by the lust, you wouldn’t have pleaded but these were desperate times now so you continue and voice your request, “I need more.”

He’s sure there’s not a day he’d choose to hear you not pleading to him like this but he still takes his chance to tease you with his words, “Greedy, greedy baby.”

Kissing his way down your neck, Matty fucking loves the way you react to his hot kisses. It’s like you can’t keep still for him, like your body is begging him to give you every ounce of pleasure.

When he starts kissing down your stomach, you know exactly what’s about to happen and your mind goes into overdrive. You can’t help but watch as the mess of curls gets lower and lower down your body, loving the feel of his lips and tongue teasing your skin as he goes.

Your erratic breathing doesn’t go unnoticed, but it only makes Matty more determined to give you the most intense orgasm of your life. He wants to drive you insane, have you so needy for him that you end up bursting on his tongue.

Matty looks up at you when he kisses the top of your thong, and once again you just nod, not needing him to verbalise the question. Although it's kind, you’re desperate for him, you would agree to anything he would offer you right now if it meant he’d be the one getting you off.

Getting to his knees, Matty pulls your underwear off you and he throws the material to the floor somewhere. As he moves himself further down the bed, he knocks your knees open and moves your legs over his shoulders, he doesn’t let his lust filled stare move from your eyes as his lips start trailing down the inside of your thighs.

If you thought he was a verbal tease, this is somehow even worse. The curly haired brunette takes his sweet time, kissing ever so slowly down your thigh before swapping to the other to repeat his actions, leaving your skin sensitive and more than likely bruised with all the attention he's showing you.

Your impatient whines as he does this have him smirking against your skin, and whilst you are loving it, the other side of you needs an orgasm after being edged earlier. You try and buck your hips up so his mouth gets closer to where you need it, but instead Matty tuts and wraps his arms around your thighs and holds your hips to keep you in place where he wants you.

“Patience is a virtue.” Matty smirks, going back and kissing over your thighs where he already has, and it has you trying and failing to move your hips to get him closer.

Slowly, you’re losing your mind though. The visual of him between your legs, the anticipation of the pleasure you’ll soon be feeling but currently being denied has you getting frantic.

“My virtue died when you fingered and edged me.” You say looking straight into his eyes, your skin still hot and heart still racing. Ardently, you demand, “Get to work.”

Matty just raises his eyebrows at you defiantly, and you know from just that look that you’re not getting anything more off him until you relent. And you’re too desperate to take any power back, so you just beg, “Please.” hoping he’ll show you some mercy.

Thankfully, he does. After kissing his way down, holding your thighs open even wider, Matty licks a bold stripe up from your entrance to your clit which has you releasing a guttural moan out into your room. The sound has Matty smirking as he starts flicking his tongue over your clit, loving the fact it’s him who’s the cause of them.

His tongue has your fingers clawing at your duvet, holding fistfuls of it as you give into how he’s making you feel. Your skin is hot, and with how sensitive everything building up to this has made you, it’s no surprise your breathing is laboured and your back arches in pleasure as he makes you feel everything so intensely.

Matty does this for a little while, teasing you, holding your thighs tighter when he feels the way your body twitches and spasms in response to his tongue. It’s not a hardship for him to learn what you like when you’re being as vocal as you are and he takes great pride in having you like this for him.

He eats you out like he kisses, like it’s all or nothing yet he’s making every effort to ensure you’re enjoying yourself, and with how wet he’s made you and the sounds leaving your pretty mouth, he knows you are. Matty’s entirely ravenous, needing to keep going and giving you all the pleasure he can, like he’s excited to finally be tasting you and he wants to keep tasting you.

Moaning against you as he sucks and plays with your clit has you having to grab onto his curls, pulling him towards you like he could get any closer. His half eyes close at the feeling, and you can’t stop yourself from glancing down at him as pleasured whines leave your mouth.

Somehow the view sets something else inside you alight. The fantasy you’ve had for so many years playing out in front of you, Matty’s head actually between your thighs looking blissed out and completely content as if there’s no place he’d rather be than here tasting you.

Matty can’t help but moan against you as you start moving your hips up and down as he eats you. The noises you’re making along with the way you’re pulling in his hair encouraging him to continue, mixed with the way you taste has Matty’s eyes closing in complete bliss.

You can feel the way he grinds his hips against your mattress, the man clearly seeking some relief as well. And you would feel bad about it but you don’t have a chance to because the curly haired man dips his head and starts fucking you with his tongue.

Your jaw drops as your thighs tighten around his head, your own falling back against the soft bedding and Matty’s hands tighten around you keeping you exactly where he needs you. His nose bumps against your clit even has you mewling small “ah”s for him.

Matty’s moans cause vibrations to run up through your body, making you pull on his hair even tighter. He goes between fucking you with his tongue and using it to tease your clit, his chin covered in your slick at this point but he’s having far too much fun to care.

Your hand that’s not rooted in Matty’s hair, you use to tease yourself. Grabbing your boob through the bralette and pinching your nipple through the material and you moan at that along with the bliss you’re receiving from Matty’s tongue. But then the curly haired brunette notices what you’re doing and he releases one of your thighs and reaches up your body to do the same to your other boob and the ache in your lower stomach starts feeling almost too intense.

“Matty,” You keep moaning but this time he knows he has you on the verge of cumming. Even though his jaw has started to ache, he doubles his efforts now, knowing he has you exactly where he’s wanted you for days, weeks, and months. And he’s not going to stop until you’re completely fucked out for him.

Your thighs are starting to tremble, and your grip on his hair is so hard he thinks you could pull it out. The stimulation is almost too much for you, it’s making your whole body feel like it’s on fire and you know well enough by now it’s because your body is dying for relief.

“F-fuck, please.” You beg, and Matty hums as he suckles hard on your clit, confirming he’s going to make you finish. And after making your back arch a few more times with his various tricks, you start to tremble and you choke on a loud moan as you come undone.

Matty can help but watch as you fall apart beneath him. He dips his head back so he can lap up your juices and he moans loudly at the taste and sight of you.

He doesn’t relent until you start pushing him off, but even then he licks your swollen clit one more time before he starts kissing his way up your body again. Even then, you're too dazed by that intense orgasm to notice the way he’s appreciating your body.

It feels like ages when you’re coming back down from your high, your chest heaving as you try to get oxygen back into your lungs and your cheeks start burning up when you open your eyes and you find him looking down at you with a satisfied smirk on his face.

Hair dishevelled from you pulling on it so much and the pink on his cheeks makes him look so fucking stunning, you’re dying to show him just how much you like him. Especially after he’s made you see stars.

You’re just dying to return the favour.

Your eyes fall down to see him and when you realise Matty’s basically still dressed, you frown at him. “You’ve got way too many clothes on.”

His shirt is still half tucked into his pants, only the buttons undone which is the one thing you managed to do earlier but even the undone bowtie is still hanging around his neck.

The smirk on his face grows bigger, “Gotta dress properly for a meal, haven’t I?” His sarcasm is heavy to tease you once more and you roll your eyes in fake annoyance.

“You’re such a little shit.” You state as a scolding, your hands going straight for his shirt to take it off him and throw it somewhere on the floor behind him.

The bowtie goes with it and soon, your fingers are working to undo the button of his trousers, tugging them down far easier than yours were. To fully take them off he stands up and you sit yourself up at the edge of the bed, watching him toe of his shoes before getting fully rid of his pants.

A few seconds later Matty is standing in front of you, only in his underwear, his taut muscles on show and his skin littered with the tattoos you’ve grown fond of over the years. You catch a glimpse of the new tattoo he got at one of the last shows of the north american tour, which reads ‘I’m a man’.

The whole view has filthy ideas sparking in your mind and you truly don’t have a filter anymore because once you see him taking the short couple of steps he has to get back to you, you let one of those ideas slip.

“I want you to fuck my mouth.” You say looking up at him with doe eyes, your mouth watering at the thought of him using you to get off.

Matty is sure his soul leaves his body when you say that and his throat dries up at the image you’ve just put in his head.

He has no idea what to say, thoughts fully gone and out of the window until you speak again, repeating what you want him to do.

Your hand comes to hold his left thigh and you teasingly and slowly let it brush upwards and closer to the edge of his underwear, “Baby, please fuck my mouth.”

Letting out a guttural groan, Matty rolls his eyes back in pleasure. You using that nickname for him always does it, he always ends up right in the palm of your hands when you utter the word to refer to him.

His hands come to cup your jaw and slightly tip your head backwards a bit more just so he’s sure he’s looking right in your eyes as he asks for reassurance, “Are you sure?”

“Mhm,” You hum in agreement, and tilt your head to the side to kiss the palm of one of his hands. With that look that you’re giving him, he can’t even think of denying you a thing and it’s like you know exactly how to get him to say yes to anything you want when you use the sweetest voice to add another, “Please?”

He wants to tell you that you don’t even have to say that word ever again but the urge to kiss you hot and hard is stronger. He crashes your lips together with such force you lean back and have to rest on one of your elbows to stay seated.

You kiss feverishly while your hands travel down his chest to his lower stomach and then slowly trail your index finger down to his hard cock.

Just that ghost of a touch has him shakily breathing, breaking the kiss as his face contorts in almost pain with the way he just wants to fully give into the pleasure but if he does then he’d burst right here, right now.

Your lips brush his parted lips as you smirk when your hand comes to squeeze his hard on and you slowly start stroking him up and down over the fabric of his boxers.

Matty lets out the prettiest sounds and you’re fucking obssessed with them so you don’t let up on your actions, only getting more intently with it, that is until he bites on his bottom lip and silences himself.

Only hearing low hums of pleasure then has you frowning because you don’t want to be deprived of the noises he makes so without a second thought you let go of him only to get rid of the last piece of clothing.

From the way he rushes through getting them off, you know he’s eager and you are too so when he’s back in front of you as close as he can get for it to be comfortable, you lick your lips and wrap your right hand around his hard cock.

The tip is already glistening with precum and red which makes you think about just how much he must’ve been throbbing, constricted in his trousers while he paid all of his attention to you.

That notion only makes you even more excited to let him use your mouth to get off and with that set in mind, you give him a few more strokes before sinking your mouth down on him.

You hum around him, your mouth being full of him and tasting him has your eyes rolling back into your head, and the loud moan he lets out only adds to it all. Your thighs clench together as you quickly get worked up by it all.

You only bob your head up and down a few times, trying to go as deep as you can and gagging around him to get you prepared for it. You breathe deeply through your nose and relax your jaw every time you go to fully take him all the way to the back of your throat, your nose almost hitting his pelvis.

Your eyes water as you take him and it’s such a sinful scene just from the sounds of your gagging and his loud moans mixing together.

One of your hands comes up to his hip then, stopping your movements and encouraging him to thrust into your mouth. He gets the instruction right away and he starts mindfully giving into your wishes. You can’t help but become a mess of moans when his hips start moving.

Matty is being gentle though, and even though he keeps grunting and moaning as he fills your mouth and your throat, it isn’t quite like you want it to be. He’s not even hitting as deep as he was when you were doing it at the start so, stopping his movements, you pull back and let go of his cock for a moment.

He’s breathless, panting, all sweaty and flushed. It is certainly a gorgeous sight seeing him all fucked out because of you but you force yourself to not get distracted when you’re meant to call him out on how his holding back.

“Thought I was clear when I said I wanted you to fuck my mouth.” Is what you say, sternly with an eyebrow raised.

He has to take a deep breath at your words but then he comes clean about his worries, “I won’t last if I do that, baby.”

And it’s true, Matty has been trying so hard to be concentrated and not cum the second you’ve touched him, it’s gonna be impossible for him to last any longer if he goes through with what you’re asking.

But you dismiss it, “I don’t care, I want you to do it properly.” And when you finish your demands with a serious, “Fill my throat.” Matty is fully gone.

His eyes darken at your words, looking down at you with pure lust and you look up at him with mischief written all over your face.

Your mouth falls open slowly and before you can pull him closer, he does by hooking his finger on the ribbon choker that’s still tied around your neck. He has his other hand wrapped around his cock which is painfully hard now, stroking himself twice before homing it on your mouth once again, and the warm wetness of it has him stuttering a, “Fuck baby–”

You’re mewling when his hips buck into your face and he hits the back of your throat, your eyes watering again, yet he still is being too careful with it. So with the intent to make him desperate for release, you bring one of your hands down to play with his balls.

That seems to do it because Matty gets louder and his pace gets increasingly faster, you’re fully just mindful now of relaxing your jaw so he can keep milking himself with the tightness of your throat.

Your hand doesn’t stop cupping and teasing his balls and that ends up making him lift his right leg up to prop his foot up right beside your hip and the new angle seems to be his undoing.

It’s pure desperation that has him going faster, tears are running down your face now and your spit is falling down your chin to your neck. You’re throbbing and the clenching of your thighs isn’t even helping anymore, so you start grinding down on your bed and it’s all that which is making you let out noises of unmatchable pleasure.

His hand comes to your head, fingers tangling in your hair so he can keep a bit of consistency in his movements which are growing sloppy when you start to feel him twitch in your mouth. When he looks down at you though, it’s like it all heightens. Seeing himself disappear into your mouth has his mind spinning and it’s a sight that will be forever engraved in his mind.

“Baby-,” He tries to talk but it’s all interrupted by his own gasps and moans, “Gonna cum.”

Your wordless answer to that is helping him achieve his climax so as he thrusts into you, you suck a little harder and tease your tongue underneath the tip of his cock and it is that which tips him over the edge. The visual is better than anything he could’ve imagined nights before when he thought of you as he got himself off or any of the dreams he’d had when you were the one to star in them.

It only takes a few more messy thrusts for him to coat your throat with his cum and you’re sure that you’ll never forget the loud groans he’s letting out.

He continues to ride his orgasm out, his hips faltering and slowing down but you have enjoyed this so much, you’re the one that continues their movements to make his pleasure last longer.

That only lasts a half of a minute though, his senses are fully going into overdrive and he cannot take any more, especially when he feels you suck him again. So with the hand that’s still tangled in your hair, he pulls you carefully off him.

Matty watches you completely dazed as you catch the last of his cum that’s dripped down the corner of your mouth when he pulled out. You make a show of sucking the finger you just caught it with, rolling your eyes at the taste of him, grinding your hips down on your bed again.

His finger comes to hook on your choker again then as he leans down to kiss you but before he locks your lips together, he looks right into your eyes and says, “You’re fucking unreal baby.”

You give him a smirk which is short lived as he attacks your lips quickly after he’s spoken. It’s hot and desperate, growing even harsher when he tastes himself on your tongue.

You’re pushed back on the bed again, and he pulls you further up as he hovers over you. One of his hands travels down to your breasts and he starts playing with them as you both get off.

From what’s just happened, you are already so worked up that you become desperate to have him do something about it. So you break the kiss, gasping for air when he pinches one of your nipples with the perfect amount of strength that has you seeing stars.

“Matty,” You start saying as you’re trying to catch your breath, but you can’t seem to find your words anymore when he kisses down your neck and starts sucking bruises onto it. “Matty-” You try once again but it only encourages him to continue more intently.

He hums as if asking you ‘what?’ but he isn’t really paying attention, he’s too focused on making you feel good after the mindblowing orgasm you’ve just given him.

You’re somehow growing hotter under him, as if you weren’t almost fully naked, and it just becomes even worse when he finishes sucking on a certain spot and he’s met with the ribbon tied around your neck, which he ends up undoing by tugging one of the ends with his teeth.

You feel a little tightness around your neck for a fraction of a second and when you see him pulling the ribbon with his teeth, you give him a pathetically loud moan in response. His hand comes up to get rid of it and throws it behind himself to continue with his attack on the skin of your neck.

You swear you’re going insane with every passing second so you force yourself to make up a proper sentence for your own sanity.

“Matty, I need you to do something.” Your hips buck up in search to grind against his but he’s purposely keeping himself hovered further up than you can reach comfortably. “I’m so fucking wet, please.”

Every one of your begs are being stored in the forefront of Matty’s mind, and it only encourages him to get more of them if he’s being honest. Yet, you’ve been so good to him, he thinks he might as well just give you something that could help you feel less frustrated.

He kisses down your chest, focusing on the top of your breasts, and teasing his tongue over your nipples over the fabric of your bralette. You whine out in frustration and he chuckles at you but his hands come under your body so he can undo the clasp of it and free you from your last item of clothing.

Once the clasp is undone, you carelessly take it off you and throw it to the floor with much more strength than necessary. Once again, your desperation has him laughing but you’re not finding this funny at all so one of your hands comes to root in his hair and tug on it, so he does something.

That has him wrapping his lips around one of your nipples and the gasp you let out is louder than you’d find needed. But you’re just so desperate for anything that his tongue flattening over your nipple, flicking it and sucking it could fully be enough to make you cum again.

And it turns out that you are that desperate because with you begging for more, Matty smirks as he continues teasing you with his mouth but takes pity on you and he drops his hand back down between your legs and he fingers you again. As his fingers carry on fucking you and his lips continue to tease, there’s no way you’re able to hold back the noises you let out as your senses are completely clouded by every bit of pleasure he’s giving you. It seems like in a matter of a few seconds you’re being completely tipped over the edge and you lose all control over your own body.

Matty watches you entirely astounded by your moans and the way you convulse and arch under him. To add to your pleasure Matty drops his hand back to simultaneously use his thumb to tease your clit, prolonging your high.

He does so until you push his hand away, entirely satisfied and a little too overstimulated. Closing your eyes and taking deep breaths as you come back around a little quicker this time and you’re glad you do because the man who’s the cause of all your pleasure decides he’s going to be cute again.

“I think I’m obsessed with you.” Matty admits as he rests himself down, half on top of you, so he can hide himself into the crook of your neck.

“Yeah,” You nod, still catching your breath. You bring your hand up that’s not trapped between Matty and your side up and route your fingers into his curls, “I think I feel the same way about you.”

You can feel Matty’s smile against your neck when you say that, and it makes you smile too as you stare at your ceiling, trying to get your breathing to return back to normal. As you play with his hair, you quickly run back through everything that’s just happened and you can’t help the small, “Holy shit.” that leaves your lips.

If foreplay and oral was that good with him, god only knows how you’re going to survive after he actually fucks you.

Matty brings you out of your thoughts though as you hear and feel him chuckle into your neck. It has you grinning at the low noise and the feeling of his lips against your neck, you can’t help but quietly ask, “What?”

“I can’t believe you were so turned on from giving me head that I just made you finish from playing with your boobs.” Matty hums, not entirely sure that he isn’t dreaming.

Despite that not being the only thing he did, you can’t believe how turned on him doing that made you. You guess it’s true what they say, good sex is psychological. And with the way you feel about Matty, it's no doubt actually having some feelings there for him has made this experience better, and you’re sure he would say the same.

But you don’t want to let him have that, so instead of agreeing, you tell him as you twist your hair around your fingers, “Don’t let it feed your ego.”

Matty hums as if taking your comment into consideration, but he sighs, “Too late.”

You’re more than likely never going to hear the end of this now, even if he’s pushing the borders of the truth. He has all the ammunition to keep you flustered at all times now. But you’ll deal with that another day.

Chuckling a little at his admission of a fueled ego, you shake your head a little as you playfully say, “You're a dickhead.”

Matty props himself up to look down over you then, and you love the way he still look a little fucked out. But clearly the man is now in the mood to tease and you know what’s coming before he even opens his mouth.

He smirks down at you, “A dickhead who just gave you an orgasm by licking y-”

Cutting him off, you lean up and kiss him so you don’t have to hear it. You know he’s joking, but you’ll take any excuse to have his lips on your own.

He kisses you sweetly and you both can’t really help the way you’re smiling into it. Happiness is exuding from the both of you, and neither of you would change a thing about this moment for the world.

Matty is utterly obsessed with you. He can’t get over the way his heart has been racing since the moment his eyes landed on you when you arrived at the restaurant.

He feels so beyond lucky he even got a second date with you, that you even have an interest in getting to know him on a deeper level. The singer does truly love your first date but this one has meant the absolute world to him and for it to finish off like this despite the both of you flirting, he really does feel so lucky.

And you’re so fucking gorgeous. Even before he got your clothes off he knew you were, but the fact he is lucky enough to see you and experience you like you are, he won't ever take it for granted. And he’s kissing you now hoping that the gesture can say all of this for him whilst he slowly gets the courage to say it outloud to you someday.

Your sweet moment together slowly turns heated again as your kisses grow in intensity. It somehow manages to go from soft and playful to you dragging groans and whines out of each other and your grasping at each other's skin. Until it goes further.

It’s still a little surreal getting off with him, making out earnestly drawing moans from him by the way your fingers tug on his hair, the way your lips meet, and the way your bodies so effortlessly turn the other on. Matty makes a show of letting his hands start wondering again, teasing your skin with gentle caresses until he has you gasping for breath again.

He takes his time edging you again, getting you close enough that you almost finish only to leave you unsatisfied and desperate for more. And he’s taking great pride in his work as you can feel his smile against your lips every time he shuts your whining and whimpering up with his kisses.

“Matty, please.” You beg, not being able to wait any longer. You need him.

“What do you want, baby?” Matty asks between kissing you despite knowing you want the exact same as him. He’s hard again now and he’s dying for you at this point, but that doesn’t stop him from demanding, “Tell me what you need.”

“Need you to fuck me.” You whine, pulling on the curls on the back of his head so he looks into your eyes as you plead, “Please.”

Matty nods, wanting nothing more than to be inside you, he asks, “Do you have any condoms?”

Whilst he did bring one just in case, he didn’t really want it to seem presumptuous by going getting his. Thankfully, you nod, and quickly reach over to your bedside drawer and Matty watches as you pluck out a clearly new and unopened box to get one out for him.

Matty doesn’t really know why he likes that you’ve got an unopened box of them. He doesn’t know if it’s because maybe you bought them especially to use with him, hoping that the date would work out well enough that you’d both get to this part of the night.

Or maybe it just makes him feel special because he’s hoping with everything he has that you hadn’t been with anyone recently. That just maybe you had been waiting for him like he had been waiting for his tour to finish so he could go on this date with you.

And it’s that tinge of what he recognises to be jealousy that pokes at his chest that makes him realise the one thing he wants is to have you only to himself. He knows it’s early and completely rushed from him but he can’t deny himself that you’re the one who makes him feel best these days and there’s no moment he doesn’t have you in his mind.

So he’s not surprised when this ghost of possessiveness comes over him when thinking of you this way with anyone else, it’s something he wishes he hadn't even thought of in the first place.

Watching you under him, giving him a small smirk before opening up the box, has him hoping with every bit of his soul that you want him for yourself the same way he just wants you.

You wiggle your eyebrows as you shake the box, the wrappers inside making a little noise when hitting the sides of the cardboard and the sight is enough to earn a chuckle from him.

“You think you’ve got enough?” He teases you, nudging your nose with his and stealing a peck before turning his attention back at your fingers getting one of the square foil packets out of the box.

“If we wanna get through what we’ve both been planning, no, probably not.” You chuckle and Matty can’t help but giggle as he traps you in a kiss after he takes the condom from you.

The box falls on the floor, the rest of the condoms spilling out but there’s no time to focus on the small mess when you’ve got Matty hungrily kissing you and your whole body lighting up once more tonight.

It’s the built up anticipation for what is about to happen that has you both desperate and, due to your previous orgasms, overly sensitive to every touch of your skin.

The way his fingers are clutching the side of your waist with such intent, you pulling him closer to you by your tangled fingers in his curls, your pebbled nipples rubbing against his chest, his knee in between your thighs propping your legs open.

Your senses are going into overdrive, both of you gasping already in the kiss and the heavier your breaths get, the less patience you both have. Leaving a few chaste kisses on your lips, Matty brings the wrapper up to his mouth and rips it open with his teeth.

You fully gasp under him, loud enough for him to hear you over his heartbeat which is ringing in his ears and that only has him needing you more desperately, he wants to draw more of your sweet sounds out of you. After tonight, he’s not really sure there’ll be a time he will have listened to them enough. Impossible.

Watching as he throws the now empty packet and rolls the condom down himself makes you subconsciously drag your fingers down your body until you can touch yourself and, with slow circles on your clit, get yourself some much needed relief.

Your relief is short-lived as your back arching off the bed when you apply a bit more of pressure has him taking your hand off yourself, wrapping his fingers around your wrist to bring your fingers to his mouth and sucks on them.

Seeing his eyes roll back at the taste of you on your fingers has your jaw dropping, and you’re so far gone by the view that you barely register him smirking as he slowly drops your hand to rest on the bed over your head, pinning it there with his left hand and taking his right hand back down around himself.

Matty brings you down to Earth again when he taps on your swollen clit with his cock, so quick they have you gasping as your attention is back on him. He chuckles seeing you fall apart so easily under him but when you glare at him, he presses his lips together so his amusement is less obvious.

“Stop teasing Matty.” Your tone stern and you’re still glaring at him to get a move on but unfortunately that only encourages him to elongate your desperation a bit more. He just likes to hear you begging at this point and pushing your buttons to see how far it takes you to reach that point is certainly something he’s really enjoyed finding out about.

He teases you once more, running the tip of his cock down to your entrance but back up to tease your clit once more which has you bucking your hips up into his. Hearing you mutter a pathetic ‘please’ again has Matty giving in to what you both desperately want.

After lining himself up, he pushes into you slowly, letting you accommodate to him as you both moan into the other's mouth at the overwhelming feeling. The pleasurable stretch of him filling you has you writhing beneath him, your nails scratching down his shoulder blade and your whines filling the room.

When he bottoms out, Matty clenches his jaw to try not to finish there and then. He focuses down on you, your pretty mouth that’s fallen open with everything you’re feeling and your eyes closed in what he hopes is pleasure.

The curly haired brunette lets his nose gently brush back and forth across yours as he quietly says, “Let me know when I can move baby.”

You hum a little to acknowledge him, and after a few seconds you nod before asking, “Please move.” at the same time your hips try to move against his own.

With how much you’ve both been waiting for this very moment, it isn’t hard for you both to set a pace that has your toes curling in pleasure. Your hips moving and meeting in the middle, his pubic bone hitting your clit at just the right intensity, your mouths swallowing each other’s moans.

In an attempt to make both of you more comfortable and change the position a little without switching completely, because you really want to see each other coming undone, he lifts one of his knees further up under yours and therefore takes one of your legs with it.

He leans forward a bit more and the new angle has you throwing your head back in bliss, unable to keep kissing him when a guttural moan comes from deep in your chest. And Matty fucking loves it, he loves feeling how you’ve lost the rhythm your hips were taking, faltering until you stop and it’s him left to keep up the pace which is now the faintest bit slower but harder.

But you’re so overcome with pleasure that you can’t seem to lift your head back up for enough time to see him or even keep your eyes open and look at him like you’d like to. He’s hitting that spot time and time again and he’s so close to you that your eyes keep screwing shut and rolling back.

And you know that looking at you is one thing he wants too because his hand comes up to cup your jaw and between grunts, he says, “Baby, look at me.” You make your best effort to at least keep your half open eyes on his face and it’s certainly hard when he’s making you feel this good but you try your best.

“Eyes on me okay?” Matty asks you again and your answer is a mewled, “Mhm.”

Staring straight into his eyes as he pounds into you makes you feel you’re having an experience out of this world. Seeing his brows furrow over his glistening brown eyes and the moans and gasps that leave his lips and hit your own open mouth, have you clenching around him.

You’re so close now, your proximity and your unwavering gaze on each other have multiplied every single sensation tenfold and you know he notices it too because he’s now the one having trouble keeping his eyes closed and not letting his head hang.

His pace is growing erratic now, trying to reach your orgasms but allowing the buildup to last a bit longer. Yet he doesn’t really know how much longer he can go when your walls are so tight around him, trying to milk him dry.

But you want to see his gorgeous eyes again, so you let your hand cup his cheek and you watch in delight as his eyes find yours again.

He dips his head a little, letting his lips find the top of your wrist so he kisses over your riot tattoo before he starts kissing his way up your palm. Smiling, you let him carry on until you end up resting your thumb over his swollen lips.

Yours are still apart, letting every noise fall from your mouth without hesitation. The way his hips hit your own have him instilling pleasure into you already, but then he goes and adds to it with another visual that is going to be burned into your retinas for the rest of your days.

Matty parts his lips as he thrusts into you, biting down on the tip of your thumb. It somehow excites you that little bit more, but what really gets you is when he dips his head further and he sucks on your thumb.

And because your hips buck up to meet his own the next time he thrusts into you, as you moan beneath him, you feel the vibration of his as your thumb presses down on his tongue.

Watching him through hooded eyes, you see his lips pursing around your finger and still sucking on it and the way he hums around it before letting it go with a pop has your mind spinning.

You can feel yourself pulsing around him now, so close finally getting relief after being denied it for what feels like an age. With your heart hammering in your ears and Matty’s moans gracing them too, it’s not long until he has you on edge.

It only takes a few more thrusts from him to have you finishing for the third time. The sound of your moans get caught in your throat as your fingers curl into Matty’s hair and your nails scratch down his back. Your back arches with the intensity of the orgasm that has you seeing white, it’s almost too much - too good.

Matty’s jaw falls open with a loud groan seeing your come undone and at the feeling of your clenching around him. It’s a miracle he manages to thrust into you a few more times without cumming himself as he wants to help you ride out your high. But the feeling gets the best of him, he finishes a few seconds after you.

He tries to hold himself up best he can, but he wants to be as close to you as possible. Without crushing you, he falls completely against you and he lets his forehead rest against yours as you both feel every ounce of pleasure as he grinds his hips against yours.

Your orgasms linger for a while, both of you sweaty messes tightly wrapped around each other, neither one of you wanting to move. When you open your eyes a little, you can’t help but smile at the closeness, and Matty’s eyes open a little as well and he whispers, “You’re unreal baby.”

Not caring about the fact that he has you chuckling, the curly haired brunette moves his jaw so he can softly kiss you again. You’re positively obsessed with his mouth and the way that even the little kisses you share have your lips tingling and heart racing.

Matty kisses you again as he pulls out of you, almost as an apology of sorts at the small whimper you released. But you don’t mind and graciously accept the kiss before Matty moves himself so he’s lying beside you and he takes the condom off and puts it in the bin.

Both of you are still entirely out of breath, now looking at the ceiling because there's nothing more either of you can do than try to control your heavy breathing. You feel like you’re having an out of body experience. That was too good to be true.

Your whole body still feels like it’s tingling, the excess oxytocin clearly still lingering in your bloodstream really making every little memory of what just happened feel great even thinking about it. Before you can mentally relive it all though, you feel Matty turn his head to look at you.

The curly haired brunette admits, “I really like you.”

His heart is hammering in his chest, from your previous activities, but also because he couldn’t keep that bit of information to himself any longer. He had to tell you, despite him not realising he’s already drunkenly told you once before.

Hearing that has you turning your head to look at him. And just seeing the way he’s staring at you with so many emotions in his eyes that you can’t quite decipher yet has your heart swelling. Because despite not being able to place every single feeling, you can tell he’s being honest and vulnerable.

So you don’t hold back for a second and you let the biggest grin take over your face as you admit, “I really like you too.”

You do see the relief flood his features then though, and you can’t stop yourself from rolling on your side towards him, forcing another sweet kiss upon him.

“I meant it when I said I was obsessed with you, you know?” You tell him, feeling the need to remind him.

“Mhhh,” Matty hums in delight, “If you keep reminding me I won’t let you out of my sight ever again.”

“Obsessed.” You grin, letting it be an accusation and confirmation all in one. You let your noses touch again, giving him an eskimo kiss before you connect your lips with his again to give him a proper one.

Matty lets you briefly escape to use the bathroom, him very much liking the visual of you getting up and bending down to collect his shirt from the floor just to put it on as you walk into the other room. What he doesn’t like is that you’ve buttonned it up a little at the front when you come back out and you’re back to hiding your gorgeous body from him.

As much as he tries to get it off you, when you lie back down beside him, he only manages a few buttons until you distract him again with rogue kisses. And regardless, you still look hot as fuck in just his shirt and he’s not complaining seeing you only in that.

He raises his arm up over your shoulder and rests it over your back, rubbing up and down your waist over the material as he grins, “You look so good in my shirt.”

You smile, not letting his words fluster you this time. Taking the compliment, you ask, “Do I now…?”

“Really fucking good, stunning.” He puckers his lips wanting you to kiss him again and you do so with a smile. He smiles into the kiss too and when he pulls away he lets his eyes run down your body again and says, “Remind me to let you steal all my clothes.”

Tilting your head to the side, you raise your eyebrows and warn him, “Don’t tempt me.”

“You’re more than welcome to, baby.” Matty grins, but then adds a clause, “Only if I can take them off you.”

Grinning, you agree not expecting anything less, “I don’t think there was ever another option.”

“Good.” Matty nods, and with his other hand he cups your cheek and lifts it a little to get a good look at your pretty face. He smiles as you look so good, but he does notice that, “You look tired.”

Chuckling a little, you nod, “Nothing new there.”

“We should nap.” Matty tells you, pulling you by your waist into him a little more, “We should skip the party and cuddle all night.”

“No, we can’t do that.” You shake your head. Although, you are quite tired after your activities and the fact you got such little sleep last night, so you give in to one of his ideas, “We can take a short nap and then we’re going.”

The curly haired brunette pouts, asking, “Why can’t we stay?”

“Because we can’t just not show up to your best mates’ New Years party.” You laugh, pecking his lips again so the pout disappears, and when it does, you add, “Plus Amelia is coming too so I have to be there or else she’ll start chatting shit about me replacing her for you and standing her up.”

Matty snorts a little at that because he playfully accused George of the exact same thing when he started seeing Charli. He loves that your friendships have exactly the same vibe, he knows for a fact that you’d all get on well together.

Despite this though, Matty still powers through, wanting to have you alone and in his arms for as long as possible tonight. “Well, you can give Amelia a lovely visual of what kept you from her and I’m sure she’ll understand.”

Laughing, you shake your head in fake disbelief, “You’re such an idiot.”

“You’re obsessed with me though.” Matty grins, stroking his thumb across the apple of your cheek as he looks into your gorgeous eyes.

“A tiny bit maybe.” You smile, pinching your thumb and index finger together so they almost touch to demonstrate how small your obsession is.

Cocking his head a little, narrowing his eyes he accuses, “Downplaying it a bit there baby.”

“Don’t start now.” You shake your head, knowing he’s trying to get you flustered for him again but you’re not having it right now.

“What?” He tries to play innocent, acting all confused about your accusations.

But you soon cut him off, reminding him, “You’re more obsessed with me so…”

And once again he has you melting into him when he replies, “Damn, you’re right. I am.”

He makes you shriek when he nuzzles his head eagerly in your neck, his nose tickling the crook of your neck and the sensation of his curls on your skin making you giggle. His fingers clutch you tight into him by your waist, his tickling on your neck stops then and it’s replaced by short little kisses being littered on your skin.

You’re grinning like a fool with your eyes almost closed when he lifts his head up to look at you. “Are you keeping them leather pants on for me tonight then?” Matty can’t help but smirk a little.

“No, I reckon they were just for you.” You smile, feeling like you should dress up a little nicer, in something that Matty will like, but that also shows “I’ll change it up.”

Matty hums, certainly interested in anything you wear. You never miss the mark, “Have anything in mind?”

Thinking about it for a moment, you pick something out mentally and nod, “Yes, but it’s a surprise.”

“Awh,” Matty coos, kissing your lips a few times to butter you up so you confess when he asks, “You wanna surprise me?“

“Not you,” You shake your head, and jokingly say, “George.”

Matty playfully frowns at you, but pretending like he isn’t the jealous one, he tries to get you to change your answer by saying, “Charli would love that, sure.”

“I would hope she does.” You nod eagerly, not being able to hide your grin when you jog his memory a little, “Remember, I’d go for both of them.”

“Would you?” The curly haired brunette gives you a look of disbelief, and he looks down and gestures to the both of you as he asks again, “After this?”

“Yes.” You confirm boldly with a proud nod.

Matty scoffs loudly, “Bitch.” before he pushes you off him and he moves so he can be the one to hover just above you for a second.

He has the both of you laughing, and he knows you don’t mean it from the look on your face and your genuine laughter at the conversation. You just love doing whatever you can to wind him up, and you’ve certainly found a way to do it and are running with it.

“Why are you so energetic?” You can’t help but ask, “Aren’t you tired?”

“Am not.” Matty chuckles, but then he cheekily gives you a knowing smile, “You were right saying you were a Grandma.”

But you act just the same and give him his banter right back, “And you really did go through with the meaning of gilf.” and Matty loves the little giggle you let out at that.

“I’m very serious about my goals.” Matty tries to keep his smirk at bay but with your big grin it's a little difficult.

You tut and shake your head dismissively, “You always have an answer for everything, don’t you?”

“You know me.” Matty cackles and you hum in agreement against his lips as he kisses you again.

Afterwards, Matty lies himself back down and pulls you against him, and he urges you to get under the covers and get comfortable which you easily oblige to. The both of you talk for a while longer, your head resting near the top of his shoulder and his arm is around your back and you chat for a while.

With you Matty finds himself never wanting a conversation to end, but he knows you’re slowly falling asleep as your voice quietens down and your responses get a little slower until they are hums filled with gibberish. But the singer doesn’t mind, even he is getting tired now after the unforgettable dessert you’ve just had.

A quick nap certainly won’t hurt anyone. He never promised George that you both would be at the party for any specific time before midnight, so he lets himself give into the post sex fatigue.

Soaking in the feeling of falling asleep with you in his arms, he feels truly content, and it only gets better when you cuddle yourself into him a little bit more when his hold around your waist tightens.

You let out a hum of bliss right in his ear and the sound is enough for him to know he wants you around for what he hopes is a while if time allows it. God help him, he really really likes you and he hopes with every bit of him that he doesn’t fuck anything up. He wouldn’t forgive himself.

But he doesn’t let himself think of things going wrong, like even the passing thought could jinx it, so he allows himself to enjoy this very moment: you laying in his arms, with your face hidden in his neck, your legs tangled together and your hand over his chest.

At first, he prays you can’t feel his erratic heart beating out of his chest, but on second thought, he actually hopes that in your hazy mind you can take in the palpable proof of the way you make him feel. He’s a complete mess for you, and he’s so eager to see where this can go.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A/N: Me and @alovesreading are going to go and repent for our sins now! See you soon for Part 6 x

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divine-misfortune · 3 months

Note

cancelling the rest of my plans for the day bc your fleshlight post about phantom has me on the floor and I can NOT get up

The post in question :))

Dew stares up at him through those pale eyelashes. A look that could have been soft, innocent. Should have been. No, Dew was watching him with the attentiveness of a hungry dog despite everything else about him being relaxed. At ease. Something Phantom was far from.

Face still colored with humiliation, Dew only sought to deepen the violet in his cheeks - he wanted his embarrassment to be vivid, the closest thing to tangible he could get.

The fire ghoul kept his fingers curled around the hard plastic regardless of his little mewls of protest. Slowly rocking it back and forth, just enough to tug at his knot (but more so to remind him of how pathetic it was to be trapped in fucking fleshlight) and let a little bit of his cum dribble out. There had been the beginnings of a wet spot on the front of his pants to begin with, a little overzealous with lube, but it was growing to become far more noticeable.

Dew smiled up at him with the faintest hint of teeth as Phantom's nails dug into the couch cushions, another sound of objection starting to bubble up but Dew hushed him before it found its way to the surface.

"Just helping bug," he shifted onto his knees. "Wanna make sure you're properly taken care of."

His pale hair slipped from where it had been tucked behind his ear as he dipped his head, forked tongue flicking out to grace where skin and silicone met. Phantom screwed his eyes shut and tried not to buck upwards at the warmth of Dew's exhale. Breath audibly hitching when he was given more, he didn't know if it was too much or not enough. It was something and he couldn't wrap his mind around it, or anything for that matter. His brain was still fuzzy, had been since he'd first popped the head of his cock into the toy now serving as a means of torture, but Dew was steadily pushing him towards having straight up static in his skull with every little movement.

When Dew kissed over his sack in an oddly sweet gesture before taking one of his balls into his mouth, it was decidedly too much. Phantom sounded wounded with his cry and Dew let out a pleased sound in response. Little vibrations to accompany the languid caress of his tongue and Phantom's eyes were nearly crossing.

"Dew - Dew, fuck, you gotta-"

He pulled off with a satisfying pop that left the little ghoul sagging into the couch.

"I know baby, i know" the sympathy in his voice was just honey masking the medicine. "Your balls still feel so full, must hurt so bad."

"Wh..." he blinked slowly, brows drawing together.

Dew tutted at him and got off the floor, finding a new home straddling his lap. Phantom couldn't help that his hands automatically went to place on his waist, his blind obedience earned him a soft chuckle. Holding the toy steady in one hand, the other came to cup his jaw and turn his face upwards before Dew kissed him.

It was no longer a gentle push towards that far away headspace, more like a full-on shove when Dew's tongue slipped into his mouth. He could taste himself, kinda salty but heady all the same, mixed with something floral lingering in the other ghoul's mouth. Kinda reminded him of Mountain's breakfast teas. Familiar and the last solid thing he could hope to latch onto to not slip entirely, but that lasted as long as it took for Dew to start shifting the toy again.

Phantom moaned into his mouth, allowing Dew to lick that much deeper. There was a bit more give to the toy now, his knot deflating slowly, slower than he'd like but too quick for Dew's liking.

He pulled back and Phantom found himself sitting there with his tongue lolling out of his mouth, fixated on the string of saliva connecting them up until it broke.

"Gonna help you feel good," Dew's thumb stroked his jaw. "Make my good boy feel good, doesn't that sound nice?"

"But...'M sensitive."

"Just sensitive cause you didn't do a good enough job, silly boy."

"I-I didn't?"

Dew shook his head and tsked. Phantom's ears pinned back at his apparent disappointment but still twitched at the slick sound of the fleshlight stroking over him. The immediate discomfort of overstimulation felt further off but still around the corner, it wouldn't take much for the pinpricks of agonizing pleasure to dig into him again.

"I'm just gonna take care of you, get that knot nice and fat so nothing spills out."

His eyes fluttered when Dew's thumb pushed between his lips, heavy head dropping against the back of the couch with a groan. Dew had found an unfortunately efficient motion. Like a more complicated handjob in a way, stroking, twisting as soon as he felt resistance to his pull. Effectively milking him for everything he had - and Dew planned on taking everything he had to give. He could feel the last of the blood in his head rushing towards his cock. Traitorously staying fat and continuing to ache, his knot threatening to swell again, Dew had more control of his body than he did.

"Wanna see you fuck this pretty little pussy full."

#hello i made it worse :)#i did not proofread this so if u see mistakes no the fuck u did not #i speedwrote this during my break and got so into it i forgot to eat my lunch ghdbdh (eating at my desk tho dw)#void writing #spicy tag #writing #answered #nameless ghouls #phantom ghoul #dewdrop ghoul #dewdrop/phantom #aeon ghoul #the band ghost #the band ghost ficlet #ghost the band

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beskarandblasters · 5 months

Text

Me and My Husband

Chapter Ten: We Nearly Drowned for Such a Silly Thing

Married!Din Djarin x F!Reader

Series Masterlist | Series Playlist

Main Masterlist | Din Djarin Masterlist

Synopsis: Din Djarin is doing what any typical Mandalorian would be doing after reclaiming Mandalore, finding a riduur and settling down. He’s still a member of the Guild on Nevarro, taking bounties here and there to support his new family. But when he meets you while you’re working the front desk at an inn on Naboo, he finds himself hooked, feeling like he’s found something new and exciting in his now mundane life. How long can he keep up appearances with his riduur? And how long can he keep his little secret with you?

Series warnings: reader is able-bodied, set post season 3, canon divergent (long live the Razor Crest), some liberties taken with Mandalorian culture/weddings/marriages, infidelity, eventual smut (starts at chapter two!), switches between Reader and Din's POV, no use of y/n

Chapter summary: Three cycles later, you and Din reunite.

Word count: 1.6k

Chapter warnings: cycles = years, alcoholism, descriptions of chronic pain, angst

Three Cycles Later

Din

Din sinks into his kitchen chair late at night, the exhaustion of the day hitting him all at once. He takes off his helmet and rests his head in his hands. This house is a skeleton of what it once was; a safe haven for you and him. Now it’s just empty and cold, all of the joy sucked out of it. He never bothered to properly furnish it. He just assumed that you’d help him with that, but of course, you never got the opportunity. So his house is stuck in the past, a mirror image of what it was like when you first stepped foot inside.

Ever since he and May separated he’s been living at his house on Nevarro full time. He works for the Bounty Hunters Guild to support himself, and also Grogu whom he has partial custody of. But… he’s struggling. He’s struggling with addiction, drinking away the pain late at night. It never fully works. The pain of losing you and his creed never disappears, it’s always in the back of his mind. So he drinks more and more, hoping that one day he’ll finally drink enough to chase away how he feels inside. He’s chasing a high that he’s never even had. It doesn’t help that his choice of beverage, Kowakian rum, causes the worst hangovers. He wakes up every morning practically unable to move from his bed, the bed that smelled like you when he got back here after your breakup. It’s wearing down his body to the point where he’s not what he used to be. He’s slower and stiffer, his body aching with every move he makes. It’s affected everything in his life, which isn’t much to begin with. It’s harder for him to go after bounties with the same speed and determination he used to have. when he comes home, it takes twice as long for his body to recover. When he has Grogu, he finds himself unable to keep up with him, the young child’s energy wearing down his father’s body more so than it already is. The truth is… Din’s in pain at every single waking moment, mentally and physically.

This physical toll on his body affects his performance at the Guild too. He’s unable to take as many jobs back to back, needing more and more recovery between them. And if a job seems like it’ll be too strenuous for him, he can’t take it, making the jobs he can choose from slim pickings. So on top of struggling mentally and physically, he’s struggling financially, too. He never thought for a second he would end up like this.

Does he regret it? Does he regret cheating on May with you? It’s hard to tell. You were the greatest love he’s ever known and part of him finds solace in the fact that he got to know that love for a fleeting moment. But on the other hand that same love cost him everything and sent him on a downward spiral though.

He is the only person to blame for all this.

“This is the only job I have and… I think you need to take it. Rent is due on your house and you’re behind,” Karga says, sliding a tracking fob across the table toward Din.

He takes a deep breath, grabbing the tracking fob with a gloved hand. He squeezes it and says, “Fine.”

“It’s on Naboo and I know for some reason you won’t go there but… I think it’s in your best interest.”

“Right,” Din says, choking back a gulp.

He rises from the booth, his joints stiff and achy. It takes him a second to situate himself before he can walk again. Karga notices and looks at him with concerned eyes, noticing how his friend used to be so strong and capable but has turned into a shell of who he once was. Din walks away, a limp in his step, and once he’s gone Karga lets out a sigh, as if he was holding his breath. Karga’s eyes are fixed on Din as he walks out of the Guild, feeling nothing but pity deep in his gut.

Din decides he’ll go to Naboo in the morning. He needs a good night's rest. This bounty is located in Theed and he’s feeling a weird mix of dread and hopefulness about going there. Part of him wants to see you. Maker, thinks about you all the time, what you’re doing now, and who you’re with. He wonders if you finally left Naboo and moved somewhere else like you always wanted.

But if he does see you he wonders what you’ll think of him, if you’ll see his weathered stare and think he’s pathetic. The rational part of him knows you wouldn’t, you’re too kind, too caring. But the mean, self-conscious part of him tells him that you’ll be disgusted with how he’s let himself go.

He’ll decide if he wants to see you or not in the morning.

He takes off on Nevarro and sends a transmission to May, letting her know that he’ll be picking up Grogu after he collects the bounty he’s going after. As for May, she doesn’t know whether or not to believe him. She just associates every bounty he’s gone after was code for seeing you. To this day, she’s never asked Din about you. She’s never inquired for a single detail about who you are or what you’re like. To be honest, she couldn’t care less. To her, it doesn’t matter if you’re the most perfect person in the galaxy because in her eyes Din is the only person to blame for what he did.

Din makes the journey to Naboo, parking on the outskirts of Theed like he did all those cycles ago. He’s flooded with déjà vu and for a split second he thinks he’s here to pick you up for another adventure but the limp in his step is a harsh reminder that those times are long gone. The walk into Theed takes him twice as long as usual, and the entire time dread and anticipation swirl in his stomach. He follows the direction of the tracking fob but to be completely honest, his find is focused on anything but the bounty right now.

And because his luck is terrible as always the first thing he sees as he steps onto the streets of Theed is none other than you, staring at him with an astounded expression on your face.

You

Standing before you is Din. You never thought this day would come, not after how you left him three cycles ago, running away from the Crest parked in the field. And yet here he is, walking towards you like he used to. Except he’s… different this time. You notice right away. He doesn’t have the same saunter in his step, instead, he’s slower, his body moving in a way that looks painful. What happened to him when you left?

Your heart hurts for him seeing him like this but there’s also a part of you that’s angry he never fought for you, that he never chased you. He just accepted his terrible fate and disappeared to wherever in the galaxy, probably his house on Nevarro you assumed. Maybe he knew deep down you’d never take him back, not after he messed up so badly.

“Hello, Din,” you say, putting on a fake smile.

“Hi, ca’tra,” he says, almost wincing at his words. You both remember the last time he called you that and how you told him to never do it again.

“I’m sorry. That was wrong. I-” he rambles but you cut him off.

“Don’t worry about it. How have you been?”

“I’m doing great. I’ve been super busy with jobs and taking care of my son.”

He’s lying. You know he is. But you let him continue his lie anyway.

“That’s so nice to hear, Din. How’s he doing?”

“He’s good. Still getting into trouble, of course.”

“That’s what sons do,” you say. It’s funny to share small talk with someone you once shared your hopes and desires with. It’s strange how life works like that.

“How are you? Are you still at the inn?”

“Mhm. I own it now. Del retired two cycles ago.”

“I’m proud of you, ca’tra.”

“Thanks, Din…”

The conversation hits a lull, neither of you knowing what to say. After a beat Din says, “Do you ever think about what it would be like if we were still together?”

You knew it was coming.

“Yes,” you admit because you do often think about the way things could’ve been.

“Me, too,” he says.

“But… Everything happens for a reason. And what we had… wasn’t realistic.”

“Oh,” he says defeatedly.

You’re hit with the same feeling like you had in the Razor Crest all those cycles ago where you feel like you need to flee, now. Being with him feels like drowning.

“It was nice to see you, Din. But I have to run to the inn now. You here for a bounty?”

“Yes,” he says awkwardly.

“Good luck,” you smile, reaching for his hand and squeezing it.

“Goodbye, ca’tra.”

“Goodbye, Din.”

You let go and walk down the street, feeling the glare of his visor practically burning a hole into you. You don’t dare to turn around to look and see if he’s still watching you, though. You blink back tears, trying desperately to hold yourself together. You can’t deny that you miss him, but the way things ended between you two was for the better.

The end

End note: We've made it to end for these two! Thank you all for following along and special thank you's to @wannab-urs, @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin, @noxturnalpascal, and @catchallfangirl for listening to me drone on and on about this series for the past three months. I first conceptualized this series back in the beginning of October when @wannab-urs made a typo on a fic rec post. And the rest was history. This is the first long term series (long for me okay😭) that I’ve ever completed and I’m so proud of myself for sticking with this. Thank you to whoever made it this far. I’m extremely grateful for you. 🤍🤍

But of course I’m never done with the tin can man, so if you’d like read another Din series from me click here to learn up my upcoming fic Was it all a dream? which is coming 1/22/24!

Graphic by @nostalxgic

Banners/dividers by @saradika-graphics

MAMH tag list: @wannab-urs @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @catchallfangirl @noxturnalpascal @nervoushottee @mandoisapunk @pr0ximamidnight @angel-in-beskar @dameron-grant-spector @xdaddysprincessxx @drewharrisonwriter @milly-louise @engie115 @survivingandenduring @unit-1021 @rentaldarling @csarab615 @swiftiegirliepop @spookyxsam @missladym1981 @sarap-77 @decembermidnight @devineconjuring @pedroslittlelady @handspunyarns @kittenlittle24 @harriedandharassed @midnightnoiserose @jbb-sgr

#mamh #din djarin x reader #din djarin x f!reader #din djarin #the mandalorian #din djarin x you #din djarin angst #din darin fanfiction #the mandalorian fanfiction #married!din djarin #married!din djarin x reader #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedrostories #starwarsficnetwork #star wars fanfiction

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missingn000 · 2 months

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a note about tpg's hiatus

hi everyone!! i've missed y'all <33 i want to share a quick note on tpg's hiatus, and how long it will last.

first and foremost, the tl;dr: i will not abandon tpg. the story remains incredibly important to me, and this hiatus is only that: a hiatus. i will return eventually, and while i am not exactly sure when "eventually" is, i hope to begin updating again soon.

now the long explanation. tpg's hiatus has lasted much, much longer than i expected. it wasn't until i took a break that i realized how mentally and emotionally drained i was after writing 600k+ in 2 years, along with being an engineering master's student then starting a job in aerospace. especially after writing sukuna's backstory (75k+ words in one month), my brain was utterly fried. all in all, it's been a lot.

as some of you may know, i started watching one piece in september. and i love it! it's an incredibly fun, well-written feel-good series. it's been a refreshing mental break to engage with a new series, especially since jjk canon has been so disappointing in both content and writing quality.

if you check my ao3, you'll notice i took a break from jjk with other series in the past: namely dr. stone, sxf, and natsume yuujinchou. this is necessary for me to remain creative and explore narrative themes that i bring back to tpg when i return to it. but by the time my recent hiatus started, it had been well over a year since i engaged with any other series than jjk, and it was starting to take its toll on me. i'm almost caught up on one piece now, which means i'll be able to focus on tpg again soon.

when i return from tpg's hiatus, updates may be slower. releasing 15k+ word chapters every 2-4 weeks was incredibly mentally taxing and required much of my time and focus to constantly be on the story. it wasn't healthy, and other areas of my life were impacted negatively. it can be easy to forget that i'm a real person with real-life responsibilities writing this story in my spare time for free -- even i sometimes forgot this.

another note on why taking a break has been so necessary is my mental health. when season 2 released and toji + satosugu was animated, the fandom exploded and tpg's readership drastically increased. while this meant an influx of amazing love and support, i also started to receive rude and hateful comments and messages.

don't get me wrong: not everyone has to like tpg. that's totally fine! but as a very sensitive person, receiving hate took a huge toll on my mental health and motivation, and i have needed time to recover from it. i've been doing better mentally lately, and have taken some measures to reduce unkind interactions. i'm working on becoming less sensitive in the meantime so i can handle it better if/when it happens again.

since i've been feeling guilty about not posting jjk content, i haven't been on tumblr quite as much, but i'm still around online on both discord and instagram. mutuals can request my priv @chiidoriii on IG, and my discord is @MissingN000 -- just shoot me a message with who you are when you request! i'll still post fic updates on both new stories as well as tpg content and previews on tumblr, so please stick around :)

thank you so much for your patience with me! i love you all so much, and truly appreciate your support. love, chi <333

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lostdreamr-blog1 · 1 year

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One of Those Days

Summary: Today your mind decided to get the best of you, but Jake was there to help you out of it.

Pairings: Jake Seresin x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of anxiety/depression, lots of fluff

Word count: 1k

A/N: Thank you all so much for reading. Sorry I have been slower to post. A new job has kept me busy. This one is short than most but I wanted to get something out there for you! Inbox is open for requests, questions, or to say hello! If you have requested something, know that it is being worked on!

Today was one of those days where the world was too loud. Jake’s alarm going off that morning was the first indication that today wasn’t going to be one of your best days. Hell, it wasn’t even going to be mediocre, but you didn’t want to jump straight to that conclusion.

The alarm that seemed to be yelling at the top of its lungs, had you reaching deep down to not get on to Jake first thing in the morning. You rolled over and threw the pillow over your head, praying sleep would find you again. But you had this feeling you weren’t going to be that lucky.

A swift slam of the front door signaled Jake had left for work and you were now alone to deal with whatever your head threw at you.

The day dragged on and you were slowly spiraling. The cars that drove by your house seemed as if they were driving through your front lawn. The beeping on the microwave pierced your ears, making you drop your glass cup on the floor. The shards of glass scraping the ground as you swept them sounded like nails on a chalk board. And the pounding of your heart soon became the only thing you could hear. The steady thumping swallowed you whole and no matter what you did, you couldn’t lessen the sound.

The world was too loud and there was nothing you could do about it.

You don’t know when or how it happened, but you were sitting on the kitchen floor, knees pulled to your chest. The front door slammed but it seemed so far away, being drowned out by the beating of your heart. You vaguely registered hands on your face and the sound of a voice you knew too well.

“Hey darlin’. I need you to slow your breathing down for me.” Their thumbs lightly brushed your cheeks in a slow, rhythmic manner. It was almost like your body knew to respond to him, because your breathing started to even out.

“Atta girl. Keep doing that for me. Just a little longer.” The voice seemed to pull you in and wrap you in a sense of comfort. It was something you didn’t know you needed but were so damn happy to have it. The sound of your heart beating dulled to a whisper, and you could feel the tears of happiness start to form.

Your glassy eyes lifted to the person in front of you and were met with a warm smile.

“There she is. You feeling a bit better?” Jake was knelt in front of you, uniform still on and worry notable around his eyes. While he held a smile for you, you knew this man too well.

“Yeah, just a rough day.” Your voice came out barely above a whisper and neither of you were convinced you were doing anything close to “better”.

“You want to talk about it?” How were you supposed to explain that your mind decided everything around you were too much? That the sensory overload which stem from literally nothing, caused you to shut down?

So, you shook your head. “I just want to go to bed.”

Jake looked you over for a few seconds and nodded his head. “I was thinking an early night as well. How about breakfast for dinner and in bed?” He helped you off the ground and wrapped an arm around your waist. You reactively melted into his touch and nodded your head.

“Pancakes?” You felt his chest rumble with laughter.

“Is that even a question? We can have whatever you want. But be warned, the pancakes will have chocolate chips in them.” You couldn’t help the smile that formed. Jake knew you didn’t eat pancakes without the chocolate chips. That was one of many things you didn’t have to remind him of.

He helped you get comfy in bed and gave you a quick kiss on the top of your head. “Don’t go falling asleep on me before I get back with the food.”

“Thank you, Jake.” He gave you a wink and walked out of the room.

The next morning you were woken up to a frantic Jake. You rolled over and saw him rushing to put his uniform on while cursing under his breath. While the sight was slightly amusing, it worried you that your normally put together boyfriend seemed to be on the verge of a meltdown.

“What’s going on?” Your voice made him jump and he hit his elbow on the wall behind him.

“Running a bit behind this morning.” You glanced over to the clock and saw it was 15 minutes past the time he was supposed to leave.

“What happened?” You sat up in bed trying to wake up enough to have this conversation.

“I didn’t hear my alarm go off.” As he said those words, you realized you didn’t hear it go off either.

“That’s strange. I feel like I always hear it. Is your phone broken?” He ran a hand through his hair as he looked for something and nearly pounced at the poor object when he found it.

“I turned the volume down.” Those simple words had warmth flowing through your body. It was days like today you were reminded how lucky you were to have Jake in your life. He was seconds from sprinting out the door when you called out, “Thank you.”

And even though he was running late, he stopped and turned around, giving you his signature smirk, “Anything for you, darlin’.”

A/N: Thoughts? Likes? Dislikes? Thank you so so much for reading!

#jake seresin x reader #jake hangman x reader #hangman x reader #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake seresin x you #topgun maverick #top gun fanfiction #hangman top gun #jake seresin #chelsea writes

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pinkishpearls · 3 months

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(boy)friend with benefits.

warnings ⚠️ : love confessions - kind of smut 🤍

You and Chris go way back. From meeting each other for the first time in a LA supermarket, he asks you where the nearest restaurant is. Guessing he was new to LA from the lines of suitcases that stand behind him, including his two handsome triplet brothers, you give him the answers which also happened to spark conversation between eachother.

“Soo C-Chris. right?”

“Yeah.”

“Your new here, hm?”

“Yeahh! Me and my brothers just moved here temporarily for our content creator job. LA looks fun, love it already! And the peopleeee! Love em’!

The conversation went something like that. Constantly firing questions at each other, sometimes even complementing one and other. The two other brothers Nick and Matt just stood there awkwardly, but after the near two years that have passed of knowing the triplets, you become closer with them.

Especially Chris.

From being good friends, to being close friends. To even flirting…

To now being naked in his bed as he thrusted his dick relentlessly into you.

This had been going on for about 7 months now, fucking with no feelings. The sex you guys had together didn’t affect your relationship and you were sure Nick and Matt knew, so you were fine with. Totally fine. Fucking with no feelings. No feelings.

So why did “I love you” slip out of you during passionate sex? You said no feelings.

“I-I love you!”

You relentlessly moan out, catching both you and Chris by suprise. Out of shock, Chris’s thrusts become slower as he starts to question you. “You what?” he asks as he examines your fucked out face which is now heating up and filling with embarrassment. “N-nothing” Nothing? Seriously?

You can’t deny the undeniable feelings you’ve had for Chris. And to be honest, they started even before the whole “friends with benefits” act. The crush just turned into love, and it didn’t get any better when you and Chris started making love. But what are you going to say to him? That you love him? What if he doesn’t feel the same way, what if he doesn’t speak to you anymore?

“Y/n. You said you love me.” he says as he carefully pulls out. “It was a-a moan. An accident.” you blatantly lie, but Chris catches onto this as his eyebrow raises up in confusion. “No one moans that. Not even me and you drive me crazy. Is there something you want to tell me?” Even in these times he still cracks a compliment and I feel my cheeks burn up, but I also feel a lump in my throat, I’m starting to cry. Before I know it, tears were streaming down my face. I start to wipe them away but Chris is too quick to act. “No no no! None of that” he coos as he watches me unravel my emotions. He pulls me gently into a hug with his warm embrace, which never fails to make me happier (and more inlove with him). After I calm down a bit, Chris places me on the pillow next to him as he bites his lip, questioning what he should say next.

“So, about t-that” you trip on your words as you feel your body tensing up. “Hey heyyy, relax. It’s fine. It’s me, Chris.” he reassures you, but that doesn’t help. You don’t know what Chris is going to do, going to say, going to act like. God, imagine if the love of your life stopped talking to you? “I just-“ and there it was, the stupid emotions that got in the way of the fucking love confession you were going to make to your friend of 2 years. You strengthen up and try again, shimmying your shoulders slightly to fling any nervousness getting in your way. “I have had f-feelings for you for the past…I don’t know. But it keeps on biting away at me. And now we have this ‘friends with benefits’ thing going on, which I like, but it doesn’t help the fact that I’m inlove with my bestfriend…”

And there it was. The truth was out. You were inlove with Chris Sturniolo and now you just sobbed and cried about how much you loved him to his face.

He looked almost sympathetic, a look of guilt but also relief on his face as he shifts his body back onto yours.

And his lips on yours.

The sweet relief knowing this definetly meant something pulled the weight of your shoulders that had been weighing you down for months. His sweet lips pressed onto yours as you both smile into the kiss. Before you guys lose your breath, he pulls away and looks into your eyes which were practically begging for him to say something.

“I love you too. I have loved you. I was j-just too scared to say anything about it.”

Before I knew it, his hypnotising lips were back on mine.

#chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets #fluff #chris sturniolo smut #christopher sturniolo

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gatorbites-imagines · 2 years

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Kinktober day 20

Bruce wayne + Hero/Villain

I really didn’t know what to do with this, so hope yall enjoy this. The reader is connected to Scarecrow in some way, no idea how but he does.

Kinktober list

- You had been a villain in Gotham for years now, having worked with Jonathan Crane before he became the Scarecrow. In the beginning you weren’t part of his villainy, but one time fear gas had spread all over your new job, and you hadn’t been affected.

- Apparently, your long past of working with chemicals and alike made you pretty much immune, at least to some of Jonathan’s earlier stuff.

- When it got around that you were immune to fear gas, people started to believe that you were working with Scarecrow or even was the Scarecrow.

- Even if it wasn’t true, people wanted someone they could target so you became their victim. You lost your job and no place wanted to hire you, you lost your apartment and even your friends and family

- That’s when your old friend Jonathan showed up and offered you a place. In the beginning he didn’t even ask for you to join in his plans, but as time passed you got more and more involved and suddenly you were a part of it.

- They called you the boogeyman. Your toxins and gasses had much longer lasting effects than Jonathan’s fear toxin. But where Jonathan’s toxin worked immediately and would wear off, yours was slower working and could lead to months of nightmares and terrors.

- But not only did you deal with fear toxins, you dealt with all kinds of gasses and liquids, affecting everything from insomnia to hunger. One of your favorite toxins made the one it was thrown on feel like they were dying from thirst even if they had just drunk something.

- One of your other favorites made the ones hit unable to sleep no matter what they did, even if they took handfuls of sleeping pills, they would not be able to shut their eyes and fall asleep. This led to many deaths from overdosing or insanity as they would go more than a week without sleep.

- You were just as feared as Scarecrow, but you never targeted the city as a whole like putting toxins in the water supply, you tended to target upper class areas, politicians, corrupt police, or people you saw as stains on society.

- You had many encounters with Batman, and you had hit him with many of your toxins over the years. It became almost a game, you would develop a new toxin, hit Batman or one of his many sidekicks and he would develop a cure.

- He had also thrown you in Arkham many times, but you always got out one way or another. Part of you found the bat endearing because he always offered to help you get out of this life, but you knew you were in too far.

- The other rogues of Gotham always joked about how the Bat seemed to have a soft spot for you, and you would always shrug and say it was because you tried to not harm too many innocent people, so you make the Bats job easier.

- It might also be because you had saved the lives of his sidekicks multiple times over the years, not that you would ever tell the other rogues. Like pulling them to safety when under Jonathan’s toxin or patching them up when unconscious.

- In the beginning you assumed no one noticed you doing these things, but Batman became less violent with you. Not a lot, but enough for you to notice. You wouldn’t be surprised if there were cameras or similar all over his sidekicks and he would have seen that way.

- It was another night in Gotham. You had just robbed another corrupt rich person blind after putting them under some new gas you had worked on.

- It was supposed to distract and stimulate parts of the brain that made you hallucinate, but unlike it being fear it would make you seem like whoever they wanted the most. It had been a pet project of yours and was still in the early stages.

- You had summed up that it didn’t work as you had planned, because the person you robbed just became unbearably horny to the point of tears, and was too busy trying to get off to notice you emptying their safe and leaving.

- The bulbs of pink gas were attached on the back of your belt for easy grabbing in battle, not that you were gonna use them. You were gonna have to work on the formula a bit more before bringing them into the field.

- That’s when the Bat appeared, and a battle began on the rooftop you had landed on. He was skilled like always, his scowl every present on his face as he tried to take you down.

- During one of these takedowns you had been thrown on your back and the bulbs containing your project shattered and the pink gas immediately scattered, smacking Batman right in the face. He immediately jumped back and covered his lower face, like he was expecting fear toxin.

- You pulled yourself into a seated position as you saw the Bat back up until he hit a wall, his legs seeming to grow more and more unsteady as he did, his chest rising and falling much faster than normal. What little skin you could see was becoming flustered, and you couldn’t help but glance down between his legs in hopes of seeing something.

- To your dismay he must have been wearing a cup or some kind of guard, as you couldn’t see any sign of an erection.

- As you got to your feet you scratched your cheek awkwardly as Batman’s knees seemed to grow more and more into jelly as they buckled. You gave a short apology at the gas, and explained it wasn’t meant to work like this, but it was still a work in progress.

- You cleared your throat and tried to adjust your stance to hide your own growing erection as Batman sank to his knees, trying your hardest not to stare as he reached between his legs to fondle at his crotch, a deep groan leaving his lips as he stimulated himself through whatever cup he was wearing.

- “Ill… uh ill go” you stiffly said, slowly shuffling around to fling yourself off the roof and get outta there, but before you can run for the hills the line of his grapple gun winds around your waist and immediately pull you back.

- The air was knocked out of your lungs as your chest met the roof and you were dragged backwards, your jacket protecting you from whatever scrapes you would otherwise have gotten from the action.

- When you were pulled back far enough, Batman grabbed your legs and flipped you over onto your back and crawled on top of you and hovered over you like some predatory animal.

- He was panting, his hot breath creating small clouds on the cold Gotham night air. You struggled and tried to roll back over to hide just how hard this whole thing made you, your face growing hot under your mask.

- You wanted to blame it on the toxin that had been spread about earlier, but you were completely immune to Jonathan’s and your own toxins and gases.

- When your mask was torn off you gasped and tried to cover your face with your hands. Sure, everyone in Gotham knew who you were, and Batman and his group had seen your face many times before, but you had grown so comfortable wearing it, that it always shook you to have it taken off.

- Your wrists were grabbed in gloved hands and torn away from your face, and before you could react lips pressed against your own. Batman’s kiss was anything but graceful, it was desperate and sloppy, and his tongue immediately pressed past your lips and wrestled with your own.

- Clenching your eyes shut you could do nothing but kiss him back, fighting not to moan as spit swapped between the both of you. The wet noises of your kissing made your hardness ache, your hips giving a twitch against his own as he sucked on your tongue.

- You were pleasantly surprised at just how good he was at kissing, and you were so taken by his lips you didn’t even notice him releasing your wrists and reaching downwards.

- It was only when you felt cold air brush against your cock that you realized. Trying to disconnect the kiss to look, you were unsuccessful as his lips followed your own and pressed you further into the roof beneath you.

- All you could feel was him moving his hands around somewhere between his legs, soon distracted as his wicked tongue brushed against the top of your mouth.

- You let out a choked noise as you felt the press of his length against your own, his skin hot to the touch and feeling like fire against your own cold body.

- Spit dribbled down the side of your face as he seemed dead set on tasting every nook and cranny of your mouth, your hands falling to the front of his suit and grasping on for dear life.

- It was good you had grabbed onto him as he soon wrapped a gloved hand about both of your lengths, his hips immediately thrusting into the grip and stimulating the both of you. His movements were quick and desperate, tiny pants and moans passing from his mouth into yours.

- Precum spilled from him like a faucet and quickly wetted his hand, making the movement slicker and even faster.

- You could barely believe what was happening as your eyes rolled under your lids and his teeth sunk into your bottom lip, his wrist twisting in skillful ways that had you wondering just how much experience Batman had.

- Moans and groans left the both of you as his hand and hips grew even quicker, his teeth sinking hard enough into you that you could taste blood. You couldn’t control your hips and started thrusting against him, your grip growing iron tight as you felt the familiar buzzing in your abdomen, the noises you made growing louder as you grew closer.

- The noise you made as you came was loud and could probably be heard all the way down on the sidewalk from the roof you were on, Batman’s hand twisting and pulling in ways that made your orgasm feel twice as long and twice as good.

- He grunted as he came, white splashes painting the front of your clothes and your softening cock, his hand rubbing it into your skin as if he was marking you.

- Letting go of the front of his suit you draped your arms over your eyes as you panted, still trying to catch up on what the hell just happened. You still hadn’t fully caught up on everything when you felt him kiss you one last time before he got up.

- Lifting your arm after a moment you saw him grapple off in another direction, his length packed away again and the man looking like he hadn’t even been affected in the first place.

- Now you really wanted to know just what Batman got up to in his civilian life. Maybe you would keep this toxin recipe, just for special occasions.

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citrusrei · 1 year

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In Every Lifetime.

Joel Miller x Reader MDNI 18+ Summary You fell for a man before the world went to hell. Nearly 20 years later, he’s there again in a different lifetime. Genre: a lil angst if you look at it right, Smut, fluff TLOU!Universe Word Count: 10.7k Warnings: Post-Outbreak!Joel, aggressive situations, a couple of hasslers, smut (piv ~unprotected~, fingering, hand jobs, creampies (again), slight breeding kink maybe? vocal dirty joel, mutual masturbation), age gap (14 years, joel is older duhh) lots of good Ol’ soft Joel, slightly possessive joel (again cause i love him), insecure joel :( happy ending cause my heart couldn’t take a sad one *please imagine whichever Joel you’d like whether it’s pedro’s or videogame joel cause I pictured both at certain points.*

AN: This is truly one of my fav things I’ve ever written lol Joel is so babygirl in it i’m crine. also this can be read as a one shot if u haven’t read the first one~ (but read the first one hehe)

pt. 1

listen to these as you read~

Life after the apocalypse was nothing anyone could have anticipated. Before the outbreak, you’d seen countless movies about zombies or the undead, or infected. But this was different. It wasn’t a virus, or a bio-weapon used to control the population. A fungus. A fungus that just so happened to mutate and create this global panic.

The night it happened you were with a friend of yours testing out a new club downtown. Everything was great. The drinks were cheap and tasty, the music was amazing, the vibe was just immaculate. You and your friend Holly danced, drank, and sang the night away. A little before 11:00pm is when things got strange. The music changed, slower now. Holly asked if you wanted another drink to which you declined, but followed her to the bar anyways.

“Another sex on the beach please!” she urged.

“You’re addicted to those, ya know?” You laughed, shaking your head.

She laughed with you, “I am not! They’re just so delicious I can’t help myself.”

As the bartender handed Holly her drink, you sent Joel a quick text asking him how his birthday was. You’d been taking things slow since the night you and him finally hooked up. He had admitted his feelings for you and you were right there with him. The both of you decided to give each other a shot. You had wanted to see him today but he had told you he was working a double and wouldn’t be home until late so you had planned something with him later in the week.

- 10:45pm Joel <3: Got home a couple hours ago. Sarah wanted to watch a movie and knocked out. Lil girl can’t run with the big dogs.

- 10:45pm Me: lol hopefully she got to see at least a bit of it! Holly dragged me to this club tonight and I’m kind of over it. Would rather be in bed with you rn 😉

- 10:46pm Joel <3: You got no idea how much I'd like that bout now darlin. You got me all weekend.

- 10:46pm Me: You better promise me that, Joel Miller!

- 10:46pm Joel <3: Promise.

- 10:49pm Joel <3: Tommy just called me. He’s in the county jail. I gotta go get him... text you in a bit.

- 10:51pm Me: You’re kidding...... jesus Tommy. But ok. Text me once you get him. Talk soon <3

You slid your phone into your bra and sighed, not surprised that Tommy found himself in a predicament like that. He was so headstrong and stubborn. You wondered what had happened to him.

“Everything okay?” Holly asked. You nodded but still you were unsure. Your eyes floated to a couple on the dance floor as your eyebrows knitted together. The woman began to twitch, her limbs snapping in different, odd directions. It continued a moment. People around her began to notice and step away, creating a circle around her. The man she was with held on to her as an attempt to keep her steady. She fell to the ground, her body still moving slightly. As this happened, the man pulled his cellphone out, most likely trying to call 911. In the blink of an eye, she rose to her feet, jumping on to the man in front of her and sinking her teeth into his neck. It physically startled you as you latched onto Holly’s arm. “We need to leave.” You said, eyes never leaving the woman, the crowd now starting to panic. People dispersed in a matter of moments. You could see someone trying to pry the woman off the man who laid what looked to be lifeless on the ground. That person suffered the same fate. She was on him in an instant.

Holly looked around and realized what was going on before pushing you towards the door. Once outside, everyone was scrambling. And not just people from the club but the man across the street, locking his bail bond business up or people fleeing from a nearby diner a few doors down. It was mania. Your heart was pounding in your chest as you looked around a moment, not exactly sure where to go or what to do.

C’mon, ___! We gotta get to my car!” You followed Holly down the street to where she had her car parked when suddenly a horde of people ran by, being chased by what seemed to be someone covered in blood. Mucous and viscera gargled from his mouth as the sounds echoed through the street. The man dove to an older woman in front of him and began his attack. Holly screamed at the event which cause the man to turn his attention to her. He swung his arm out for her, grabbing her wrist and pulling her forward. You leapt into action, grabbing her body and pulling her back to you with such force, you could feel her back pop.

“Come on, run!” You screamed. The two of you sprinted to her car, not even minding the fact that both your heels had broken off in the process. She started the ignition and sped off, driving anywhere besides here.

“What the fuck is happening?!” She yelled, checking her rearview mirror to make sure no one was following.

“I’m not sure. I need to call Joel.” You pulled your phone out and dialed his number, but it went straight to voicemail. “Fuck!” You called a few more people, Tommy, your mom, your sister. No one answered.

“I gotta get home, ___. My-My son... I left him with the babysitter.” Holly cried, tears flowing now as she thought of all the possibilities of what could be happening to her child.

“Okay- It’s okay. We’ll go get him.”

You and Holly sped to her home, not minding the speed limit as literally no one was. You both got to her house without a hitch, thankfully. However, upon arriving you noticed the door was wide open. Holly’s eyes widened.

“Stay here. I’m going to go in.” She breathed, shaking so bad she could barely unbuckle her seatbelt.

You nodded, checking your phone again and seeing you had a missed call from Tommy. You called him back immediately. It rang once, “Tommy! Hello? Can you hear me?”

“___! I can hear you but barely.” He was staticky. The call was barely hanging on. “Where are you? Are you safe?”

Tears began to prick your eyes as he spoke, his voice comforting you. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m with Holly. We’re getting her son. What is happening? Are you with Joel? Is Sarah okay?”

Tommy sighed, “I’m not sure. It’s a mad house. Av-oid downtown bu-t drive west. We’re over that w-ay. I was with Joel and Sarah b-ut I got sep-arate-d. Meet us p-ast the theater o-n the west side, okay? I got to g-” Suddenly the call dropped, showing no signal. At the same time Holly ran out with her son RJ in her arms. She set him in the back seat and jumped into hers, her tires squealing as she backed out of her drive way. Just as she pulled out, the babysitter came running out of her front door, growling animalistically. Your eyes flashed from her to RJ, checking for any wounds which you found none. He was bawling, completely terrified.

“Hey, Tommy said drive to the west side past the theater and we can meet them there!” You said, climbing into the back seat to comfort RJ. You cradled the 2-year-old and hushed his sobs. He clung to you for dear life as you rocked him back and forth. You drove just outside of Austin, avoiding the mobs of people. Many people had the same idea as you but the flow of traffic stayed decent, only stopping every so often. The three of you rode in silence until a blockade came into view. It looked like the military was stopping people and directing them east. The exact opposite of where you needed to go. As Holly pulled up to the officers, they signaled her to roll her window down.

“How many in the car?” he asked, shining his flashlight in the vehicle.

“Just us three.” She answered.

He nodded, typing something on a tablet he held, “Okay, head east 15 minutes from here. There’s a larger Military presence over there and they’re taking survivors. I’ll add 2 women and a child to the list so they know you are coming.”

“No-No, we need to head west! We have people we need to meet!” You said quickly. The officer scowled and shined his light back to you and RJ who had calmed down into sniffles.

“Sorry ma’am but you can only go east. West side of Austin is under lockdown and no one can leave or enter. You go east.” He finished, walking to the car behind us.

You set RJ down next to you, buckling him in before returning to the front seat. “We need to find Joel and Tommy. We can’t go East.”

Holly shook her head, turning her tear-soaked cheeks to you. “No, we’re going east. I have RJ to think of, ___. If Joel and Tommy are smart, they’re already there waiting for you.” You sighed, defeatedly. She was right. The Miller brothers were very resourceful. It was a possibility. Maybe they were already at the safe zone. Same with your family. You nodded, your heart twisting in your chest as you agreed with her and then you were off.

It was a 15-minute drive but you could see the lights and helicopters before you even got there. It was massive and there were hundreds of people and tents popped up everywhere. It would be forever before you found anyone. The officers let you all in, setting you and Holly into a medical tent with a few other people. RJ slept in his mother's arms as the Doctors and Soldiers came in and out of each tent. Your leg bounced with anxiety. You glanced around the tent and around the area in general. People sobbed and cried and yelled, asking where their loved ones were, or what was going on, and saying they wanted to go home. You couldn’t help but to agree. You wanted nothing more than to go home and go to sleep and wake up and have this all be dream.

Some time passed before the fedra soldiers came back with water and blankets. They said they were transporting people to quarantine zones as soon as possible. You wanted to fight back and say you had people to find, but everyone was saying that. So you sat and obliged.

Finally, the doctors made their way into your tent, checking on the other habitants first. They did a full body check on the young girl sitting on the cot. She was clean. Next was the mother, she didn’t speak any English. She cried to the doctor, “Por favor, doctor. No estoy enfermo. Quiero irme a la casa.” The doctor just looked at her, checking her body over anyways. She cried and cried and your heart broke for her. It made you sick. You wanted to go home too, desperately. You wanted your mom or your sister. Or Joel. The doctor finished his search and nodded to the soldier. The soldier came over to the woman and dragged her away. Her daughter screamed on the cot as they subdued her. You couldn’t look anymore, it hurt too much. You averted your gaze back to Holly and RJ who was awake now, rambling in her arms. She raised her hand to wipe the hair out of his eyes, and that’s when you saw it. Your eyes widened as you noticed the three scratch marks on her wrist.

Present Day. It was fall now. Mid-October. The cold decided to make an early appearance and you were thankful for the older couple you’d stumbled upon a few weeks ago. They’d stocked you up with a good amount of food and a thick winter coat. The old man had been saying it was going to be a Winter with a sharp bite and offered you the jacket. Who were you to deny an old man and his wisdom? They let you stay there a couple days. Maybe they had been too trusting. You could have easily killed them while they slept a few doors down from you. You’d even thought about it. They had plenty of food and a barn with a couple cows and chickens. You could just take it if you had really wanted to. You hated that those were thoughts you had. They were showing you such kindness and trust, hell, the older woman even baked you a pie. A fresh baked pie?! It had been probably 20 years since you’d had one of those.

The course of the last 20 years moved in a blur. From you being split from anyone you’d known and sent to a QZ in Illinois, to that said QZ being destroyed by fireflies only 5 years of being there. You’ve had to do horrible, heinous things to survive; which you hated yourself for. You searched and searched for anyone familiar. Someone you’d gone to school with, babysat, or maybe a neighbor. Anyone. And that never happened.

As you scrambled for a place to find shelter, dark storm clouds rolled in, bringing a late fall storm. The trees all shades of burnt sienna and burgundy as their leaves fell to the ground, leaving the smell of their decay lingering in the air. It was a comfort to you. You’d always been a fall type of person and being out here in Wyoming, it was almost magical. You adored the whip of the wind across your skin as the air became colder, a few drops of rain kissing your cheeks. In the distance, you could see a small shack, clearly (hopefully) abandoned. You trudged on forth, minding the ache in your knees. You’d been walking for a while now, and you definitely weren’t 22 anymore.

As the shack came into a better view, the rain began falling harder. You picked up speed, not wanting to be completely soaked and thankfully mother nature allowed you to reach your destination before it really pelted down. Once inside you looked around and no surprise, it was empty. It was a small, dusty home. Only having a living area, kitchen and bathroom with a bedroom off to the side. You sat your backpack and rifle on the couch as you sat next to it, reclining and stretching into the cushion. You were so comfortable as you listened to the rain patter against the roof. The room was dark and cold, you couldn’t help but close your eyes and drift off for a bit.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed, but when you woke up it was still raining. You stretched, shaking off any remaining drowsiness but when you went to reach for your backpack a gun cocked at the back of your head. You froze, raising your hands in compliance.

“Stay fucking still.” The voice said. You blinked, annoyed with yourself that you let your guard down. “Don’t plan on going anywhere.” You retorted.

You sat there a few moments before another voice spoke, “Hey, kid! What are you doing?” The gun’s nozzle stayed firmly planted against your skull, “She was in here asleep! I was getting the upper hand!” The other person came up to your assailant and pushed the gun away before stepping in front of you, hand at her gun on her hip.

“Who are you?” She asked. She was average height, darker skin tone and had these beautiful braids in her hair. She seemed a bit younger than you but had to have been in her mid to late thirties.

“Doesn’t matter, I’m just passing by.” You sighed, not really in the mood for an interrogation. I mean, you’d just woken up.

“Why are you in the area?” she asked, probing further. The other person, a young girl, went to stand next to her, eyes locked tightly onto you. Did you really come off as that threatening? The girl had to have been 13-14 no older than that. Maybe 15. You couldn’t really tell.

“I told you. Just passing by.”

“Maria, she doesn’t really look like much of a threat...” The younger girl hushed. The older woman, now known as Maria, sighed. “What’s your name?”

“If I tell you, will you let me leave?” You asked, your annoyance increasing.

“It’s pouring still. You want to leave in the middle of a storm?” The younger one remarked.

You sighed, “It’s ___. My name is ___. I don’t have any intention of hurting or robbing or killing any of you. Just needed a place to stay while it rained. Is this your place? I didn’t mean to intrude.”

Maria shook her head. “No, it’s not. We were out on a hunt and it started pouring. Saw this place and had the same idea as you, I suppose.” Maria relaxed, removing her hand from her hip and settling down on a chair opposite from you. “I’m Maria. This is Ellie.”

Ellie scoffed, “Maria! We could have used fake names!” You smiled softly, loving the kick-back. Maria just shrugged, relaxing further into her chair. “Where you from, ___?”

Your eyebrow quirked as you thought of an answer, “Good question. Kind of everywhere. Midwest originally. Stayed in the Chicago QZ after the outbreak. Didn’t last long. Been traveling since.” Which was mostly true. You were in Texas of course for a while, and there had been groups you stayed with since the QZ fell, but none of them worked out in the end.

“Why Wyoming now?” She pondered.

“Well, just kind of found myself here. Was with a few people and that ended. Now? Well...”

“What happened to them?” Ellie asked.

“Doesn’t matter. Looks like the rain is letting up. Am I free to go?”

Maria sighed as she hesitated for a moment. Ellie watched her intently not quite sure where she was going. After some time, Maria spoke. “Alright. You can go if you’d like. Want to follow us though? We have a town a bit north from here. Could set you up a place to stay for a few nights, get you some food, a shower...?”

“A shower?” You asked incredulously. It’d been so long since you’d had a proper bath and you knew you needed one desperately.

She chuckled, nodding.

“A hot shower too!” Ellie chimed in.

You hesitated a moment, weighing your options. One, you could go and have an amazing shower and meal and sleep in a safe place... maybe even on a bed. Or two, it was a trap and they were going to sell you off or maybe even kill you and cook you. If it were the latter, they probably would have killed you by now, so you decided. Fuck it.

“You have a deal.”

You followed Maria and Ellie a few miles until a rather large town came into view. You could see the area had power as the sun had begun to set. Lights twinkled throughout the homes and your heart almost got caught in your throat. “You guys have electricity?”

Maria nodded, “Yep. We have a dam nearby that give us power and stuff.”

You all walked a bit more before finally reaching the town. It was massive considering things. As you approached the guarded gate, you could hear people chattering and kids laughing. What were you about to get yourself into?

Maria raised her hand at the guard who stood at his post, signaling for them to open the gate. As they did, a man rushed to Maria’s side pulling her into a tight hug. You didn’t pay much attention to it as you peered into the town, eyes wide.

“Where have you been? It’s been hours! I was worried sick!” He spoke. Maria rolled her eyes, “I don’t know if you knew this but it was raining cats and dogs about an hour ago? Ellie and I found a little shack and waited it out. We found her too.” She said, pointing towards you.

Your attention was brought back to Maria and as you looked to the man in front of her, your eyes widened even further. His face matched yours as you both stared at each other.

“T-Tommy...? No fucking way.” You stood there like you’d seen a ghost. Tears pricked your eyes and you blinked them away immediately, scared that if you looked away, he’d disappear. Tommy rushed to you, pulling you into a tight hug, squeezing the air out of your lungs. You clung back to him, letting the tears fall freely.

“___… I can’t believe it.” He breathed into the side of your head, bringing his hand up to your hair.

“I’m guessing you know each other?” Ellie asked.

The two of you embraced a moment longer before he let go of you, keeping you at arm's length. “What... where... I can’t even formulate a sentence right now.” He said, tears of his own stinging the corners of his eyes. You laughed, biting back more tears that dared to spill, “I’m in the same boat, Miller. It’s been so long.”

Your heart was pounding as you reunited with your former friend, just stuck in a state of shock that after all these years, you’d run into someone like Tommy Miller. What are the odds?

“This your place, Tommy?”

He nodded, “Yeah, Maria and I oversee things for the most part. Come on, let’s get some food in ya.”

You followed Tommy, Maria, and Ellie through the town until you reached the mess hall in the middle of it. As you walked through the streets, people greeted Tommy and Maria. They were doing their duties or relaxed on their porches, enjoying their space. Enjoying their life. Their guards totally let down. It was a sight to see. Children played with each other, splashing in the fresh rain puddles and chasing each other down in a game of tag. It was almost unreal.

The four of you entered the mess hall, the smell of fresh cooked food entering your nostrils. You’d been living off canned beans and peas for the past few weeks so your stomach was instantly rumbling. Tommy sat you at a table while he went and grabbed you a bowl of chili and bread. You could have cried as you ate your first bite; it was hot and fresh. “Is it good?” he laughed. All you could do was nod, stuffing your mouth with another spoonful.

After you ate, Tommy and you caught up to date as best as you could. Ellie and Maria had wandered off somewhere else leaving the two of you to yourselves. “So, you and Maria?” Tommy smiled, “Yeah. Couple years now. Even married her.”

Your eyes widened, smiling at your longtime friend, “No shit! Wow, who would have thought Tommy Miller to be married.”

He laughed, “Yeah, yeah. Such a shock, is it now?” You just laughed back, looking down at your empty bowl.

“What about you? Anyone special over the years?”

You rolled your eyes jokingly, “Maybe a few here and there. Nothing serious though.”

“Don’t know why. You’re still a looker.” He poked.

“There’s the Tommy I know and love.” You grinned, pushing his shoulder playfully, “Not everyone has the luxury of living in a town like this one and meeting the love of their life.”

Tommy leaned back in his chair, agreeing with you. “Well, maybe it’s sudden but you know how I am. You know you have a place here with us. We’ll set you up with a lil’ house. Get you on the board for some jobs. Wasn’t a doubt in my mind when I seen you out there that I was gonna let you leave again.”

“You gonna hold me hostage, Tommy?” You laughed.

“Might have to.”

You’d be a fool to pass it up, you knew it. But you were nervous. How could you adjust to a life of ‘normalcy’ after being essentially feral for so many years.

“Mind if I think on it a bit?” Tommy shook his head, “Take all the time you need. In the meantime, I got someone you might want to see.”

Your eyebrows knitted together in thought. Who could he have been talking about? And then it hit you. In the excitement of everything that had been happening in the last couple of hours, you hadn’t even considered the idea that Joel could be there. Your heart started pounding in your chest again, butterflies swarming in your stomach as the thought of seeing him entered your mind. You’d convinced yourself that he’d died years ago. That both him and Tommy had died and Tommy was in fact here before you. It’s been 20 years and the idea of seeing Joel Miller still sent you spiraling. “He isn’t…” you began. Tommy smiled at you as he radioed someone over the talkie, “Anyone got eyes on Joel?”

Your heart hammered so hard Tommy could probably hear it. He had to have been pulling your leg. You started becoming self-conscious. You hadn’t showered in weeks, you were grimy, you had aged. You couldn’t help but laugh to yourself because when was the last time you’d had to worry about that?

“He just got in from patrol, you need him?” A man said on the other side of the radio.

“Yeah, send him to the mess. Got someone he needs to see.”

“Roger that.”

Tommy made small talk while you both waited for Joel to arrive. You couldn’t process anything though. You were suddenly so nervous. How was he going to react? Would he be just so happy and cry? Yeah right, that was so anti-Joel it was laughable. Would he just be nonchalant? Like, wow. Been a while. Nice to see you. You couldn’t even predict it. Tommy could sense you were anxious and placed a hand on your shoulder to calm you down. “Hey… it’s Joel. You know him. No need to be nervous.”

He was right. You did know him. But the keyword was did. You knew him 20 years ago. You’ve changed since then so of course he’s changed as well. What if he didn’t even remember you? God, you’d be so embarrassed. “Y-You’re right. I’m just in my head I guess.”

“Well get out of it. I think you’ll be surprised. Want a drink?” He offered.

“God, yes. What do you have?”

“Well,” he began “probably don’t got those fruity little drinks you used to like but I can sure get you a glass of whiskey.”

You laughed, exhaling a breath you didn’t even know you were holding, “Okay. Whatever you got.”

Tommy returned with the drink quickly. You downed it as soon as it hit the table, the whiskey burned the back of your throat and chest as it went down.

“Still can’t shoot whiskey, huh?” Tommy teased. Your face scrunched up into a look of disgust, “Fuck, guess not. That’s awful.”

Tommy opened his mouth to say something but was distracted by the mess doors opening. There he was. Joel Miller in all his glory. Tommy walked up to the man, patting him on the back before striking up a conversation. You were out of earshot so you couldn’t hear anything but you weren’t sure you wanted to. If you were anxious before, you didn’t even know what to call how you felt right now. You felt like you could throw up on the spot, but maybe that was the whiskey talking. He was the same. A bit aged, but still Joel. His hair was grayer, bit longer too. Still scraggly, but it’s always suited him. Maybe he was a bit more muscular but you couldn’t exactly tell cause of all the layers he had on. You stirred in your seat as your heartbeat went a thousand miles per minute. He was here, and he was alive.

Tommy led Joel over to the bar and poured him a glass of amber liquid, maybe in a way to prepare him. Joel took a sip, not noticing that his brother had signaled you over. You stood from your chair, stomach in your ass as you made your way over to them. Nothing could prepare you for this. You had half a mind to run out and never look back. But your heart yearned for him, even if it were just to be in his presence, even just to say ‘Hi’.

You reached both men, standing at the chair behind Joel who had his back facing you.

After a moment of you trying to talk yourself up, you spoke. “I’ll have another one, Tommy.” You said, sliding your glass over to him. Joel turned around, finally aware of your presence. His eyes scanned up your body until they met your face.

A chill ran up Joel’s spine as he heard a voice ask for another drink. It was a voice he knew all too well. One he hadn’t heard in 20 years, besides in his dreams. His eyes met yours for a moment, until you turned away under his gaze. No words were said and honestly you didn’t feel like they needed to be. He stood from his chair and faced you fully, eyes shimmering behind the tired look on his face. Almost like he was renewed.

“Hi, Joel.” You managed to get out, your words finally finding you again. Confidence found you too as you looked the man in the eye. He sputtered a moment, not quite sure what to say before he decided nothing was best. He wrapped his big arms around your frame, pulling you in for a hug that was even tighter than Tommy’s. You hugged back, gripping to the back of his flannel. He smelled the same with just a hint of something new. That warm, musky Joel smell that reminded you of cedar and whiskey with the added sent of pine. You could have gotten drunk off it. Not in a million lifetimes could you have imagined the day would come where you were reunited with him. You had to have been dreaming. More tears spilled and you cursed yourself, tired of all the waterworks.

Joel held on to you for what seemed like an eternity. You didn’t mind at all. In fact, you welcomed it. It’d been too long since you’d been touched in general you hadn’t realized how much you’d been craving something like this, let alone from him.

“I’ll give the two of you a moment.” Tommy said, knocking on the bar and walking over to Ellie who was coincidentally walking up to you all and pulling her away with him, “Oh c’mon, Tommy!” She yelped.

Joel finally pulled away, but still keeping you at bay, “I don’t... I don’t understand. Where did you come from?” He was breathless. He kept thinking it was a dream, you being here. He didn’t want to wake up.

“Well, that’s a long story,” You laughed, “Most recently from Colorado. But it doesn’t matter. I don’t even know how we’re both here to be honest.”

Joel smiled down to you, his grip tightening, “It’s kind of unreal, right? I kind of.... thought-”

“That I died? Trust me, when I saw Tommy, it was like I’d seen a ghost.” You recalled, eyes softening as it really hit you that Joel was here in front of you. Unchanged, just slightly grayer.

“I-I looked for you... For years. I kind of went mad about it for a while. So much happened that night.” His face twisting into a look of discomfort as he remembered the night things started.

The two of you sat and spoke for hours, catching up on everything. Joel told you about Sarah and how Tommy stopped that soldier. You cried when he spoke about her; he teared up too. You told him about Holly and how she’d been taken that night. How you looked after RJ until he got sick one winter when he was 8. He didn’t make it either. He told you about the Boston QZ and people he’d met along the way. How he met Ellie and how that went down. You did the same. A lot was similar in the way you lost people, and a lot was different.

At some point during the conversation, Joel reached over the table and took your hands into his. You couldn’t even imagine pulling them away. By the time you caught each other up to speed, the clock above the mess door said it was nearly one in the morning. At this point, it was only you and Joel in the room. It was so strange to you how 20, almost 21 years had passed and it was like you’d talked to him yesterday. You both fell so naturally in line with each other, you had no idea why you were so nervous to begin with. The two of you sat in silence while Joel rubbed circles on the back of your hand with his thumb. You hadn’t felt this kind of comfort in so long, you didn’t want it to end.

Suddenly, the doors burst open to reveal an irritated Ellie and an exasperated Tommy. “Joel, you have all day tomorrow to catch up. You promised me you’d teach me that dumb song on your guitar.” she said, throwing her body down on the chair next to Joel.

“I’m sorry, we tried everything in our power to keep her entertained. You know how she is about her Joel.” Tommy joked, pushing Ellie’s head forward slightly.

Ellie scoffed, “Yeah, right. This old man? I’m just making sure he makes good of his promise.”

“You know I always do. But, she’s right. It is gettin' late. I’m sure you gotta be tired.” Joel said, looking over at you. You nodded, finally paying attention to how exhausted your body was.

“Yeah, I am. I’ll give you Joel back, Ellie.” You said smiling to her, “Tommy, you said you got a place I can stay a while?” He nodded, beckoning you with his hand to follow him. You went to follow him but not before Joel grabbed your wrist, stopping you from going any further.

“Promise we’ll talk tomorrow?” His eyes searching yours for something you weren’t sure of.

“’Course. I’m not going anywhere.” Your answer seemed to satisfy him as he gently let go of your wrist and stood. “Alright.”

The next few days flew by. You’d gotten cozy in your tiny home. Which really wasn’t so tiny. Two bedrooms, a working bathroom and kitchen. You could have died there you loved it so much. Tommy had taken you to the pantry to get some essentials stocked up in your house. They gave you a few days to settle in before getting your answer on if you’d be staying long term. Which, of course you were. You saw Joel and Ellie every day. She was always in tow behind him which you thought was the cutest thing ever. She’d been growing on you and you hoped you were growing on her as well. She acted tough at first, almost like she wasn’t interested in getting to know you, which Joel told you she’d come around. You really hoped for that. And you succeeded.

It seemed like Joel made up any excuse to see you throughout the day. Literally the most mundane things, and there he was. Knocking on that red front door of yours.

“Tommy told me the sink has been leaking. Figured I’d come take a look at it.”

“Actually, the sink has been doing just fine.”

“Oh, well. Maybe I should take a look anyways.”

Or, “I made an extra sandwich. PB&J. Ellie said she didn’t want it. I figured we could have lunch together.”

“Oh, I actually just made some eggs. Also, aren’t you on patrol today?” He pouted, “Oh, yeah. I have a lunch break though. It’s alright if you don’t want it. Jus’ thought I’d ask.”

“... a peanut butter and jelly sandwich sounds pretty good right now.”

And even, “Hey, Maria said they’re playing that one movie you liked at town hall tonight. The one with the green guy and the donkey?”

“Shrek?”

“Uh, yeah. I think so. Want to go watch it me? Or, uh... I mean, Ellie and I?”

“Sure, Joel. I’d love to.”

It was so funny to you. But you loved it. It was so in character for him to beat around the bush or to just make the little excuses to see you or hang out with you without just plain saying “Let’s do something.” You’d come to realize Joel really hadn’t changed much at all in the decades you’d been apart from him. At least, in the ways he’d been showing you. You also realized maybe you hadn’t changed much either over the years. You found yourself falling into ‘normalcy’ easily. You lived for the moments where Ellie would come over and ask you to have dinner with them. Or the little excuses Joel made up to see you. It filled your heart in ways you weren’t even aware of. You were excited to wake up each day, knowing you were with people. Maybe even your people.

Days turned into weeks and you’d even been assigned work at the preschool during the day. Sometimes you’d take shifts at the mess halls bar, serving drinks to the men and women in the town. You figured it was a good way to make friends. Joel and Ellie always sat at a table near the bar when you'd work with the excuse of keeping you company. Not that you minded, at all.

One night, a few months after settling in Jackson, you called Ellie over to the bar, “Hey, come here. Wanna teach you something.” Ellie pointed to herself making sure you were talking to her to which you nodded, smiling to her.

“What’s up?” She asked.

“Wanna learn how to make a drink?” You offered. Ellie’s eyes lit up and she agreed eagerly, “Um, yeah, duh! What drink?”

“Well, let’s see what we got. Not much to work with but here,” You said handing her the glass, “Put some ice in it, and fill it up to here with this.”

You handed Ellie the bottle of bourbon on the shelf behind you. She opened the bottle and filled the glass halfway, eyeballing it to exactly where you had pointed. “Hmm, how about we top it off with this?” It was an almost empty bottle of ginger ale. She followed your instructions, filling the glass to the brim. “Okay, now take this spoon, put it at the top of the cup and slam it to the bottom.”

Ellie looked at you with her eyebrows quirked, “Slam it? But why?”

You laughed, “Just do it. Trust me.”

Ellie tilted her head, unsure, but did it anyways. She slammed the spoon down, causing the glass to fizz up, nearly spilling over the edge. “Oh shit... Can I drink it now?” She asked eagerly.

You laughed again, now tilting your head as you thought a moment, “Well, not too sure about that one, Ellie. Why don’t you go ask your dad?”

Ellie grabbed the glass and carefully walked over to the table Joel was sitting at. You watched from a distance as she asked the older man if she could drink her creation. Joel looked over to you and gave you that look, you mouthed a sorry and stifled a giggle. “Not today, kiddo. Try again when you’re older.”

“Oh, c’mon, Joelllll. I can’t even have a sip?” She whined. It was endearing.

You watched as the two of them went back and forth, arguing over the drink and who was going to drink it. You smiled to yourself. The moment felt so... domestic. You didn’t know what to think of it. But by the way your heartbeat picked up, you figured you might have liked it.

You were cleaning glasses and organizing the liquor when a couple of men sat at the bar, and removed the hats off their heads. “Back from a late patrol, boys?” You asked, placing cups in front of them and pouring some whiskey into it.

“Yes, ma’am. Not much out there when it’s ‘bout 10 degrees and snowing.” One of them said. He was a regular. Here at the bar every Thursday and Friday. Maybe Sunday’s. You’d picked up from his friend that his name was Luke. He was younger. Probably about 25, maybe 26. His friend, who you learned was named James was a bit older. Mid-thirties, married, had two kids. They were both nice, however, James was a flirt despite being wed. Luke tried but he was pretty inexperienced. Both alright looking though, the younger being taller and thin, blond hair and blue eyes. The older one was shorter in stature, bit thicker, with darker hair and green eyes. If you were honest, you weren’t the biggest fan of James, but a you remained cordial.

“It is a chilly one out there,” James began, “Luke needs someone to keep him warm at night. You’re single, aren’t ya, ___?” He said, smiling. His grin somehow gave you bad vibes, but you smiled back nonetheless.

“I am. But I'm not looking right now. Sorry, Luke. I’m old enough to be your mom!” You laughed, finishing up wiping a couple of glasses and setting them in a tray under the bar. “Barely! Maybe if you were a teen mom or something.” He retorted. You just smiled and went about your business.

A little while later after a few more people came and drank, it was almost time to call it a night. You peaked behind the people finishing up their drinks and sure enough, Joel was still there, with a book, listening to the random music that played on the stereo. You bit your lip, hiding the smile that adorned it. He was always there.

“All I’m saying is that, if I weren’t married, I’d be all up on that! Luke, c’mon she’s a single cougar. Get your head in the game.” You overheard James's whispering to the younger man next to him. James sighed, “I don’t know, James. She’s been seen with that Miller guy. Not Tommy but the other one. He’s scary. Heard he’s killed a bunch’a guys.”

“Oh, come on. He’s not that bad. Just an old dude. Plus look at her. She’s fucking worth it, man. The ass she has on her? God, and those tits.” James continued.

You mentally scoffed. You figured he was a slime ball but this was just flat out gross. Thank God the mess hall was closing soon because you were about ready to give the man a piece of your mind. Suddenly, James said something, attempting to get your attention but you pretended not to hear.

“Helloooo! I said can Luke get another drink here?” He repeated himself.

“Oh, sorry. I’ll pour you one more but we gotta close up soon.” You replied, filling Luke’s glass once more.

“Jesus, Luke. You see that? Dumb and hot. I bet you could convince her to get in bed with you.” This was your last straw. You get they’d been drinking but they clearly lacked common sense. You turned to the sleazy drunk, ready to tear him a new one but it turned out you didn’t need to. You stood there; arms crossed waiting for whatever was going to happen next.

“What’sa matter, baby? Suddenly want a piece of what Jamesy-boy has to offer? Got enough to go around!” Your eyes rolled as he tried again, digging himself a further hole.

“Don’t think she likes what you’re offering her, Jamesy-boy.” Joel said behind him, placing both of his hands on either of James shoulders. Luke’s eyes widened at what was happening, or at least about to. He had some decency to know what James was saying was wrong, but he lacked the balls to say something about it.

“Wha-What... How would you know what she likes and doesn’t? How dare you come up and put your hands on m-” James bit his tongue when he turned around to see a seething Joel behind him.

“Wanna repeat what you were about to say?” Joel asked, leaning down into the man's face. James shook his head quickly, struggling to move from his seat as he was so frightened.

“If I see or hear you talking to her again, hell, even lookin’ at her, I’ll mess you up so bad, your wife won’t even want what ‘Jamesy-boy' has to offer. Y’hear me?” Your eyes widened at Joel’s threats and you couldn’t help but like what he was saying. His words turned in your stomach as you felt the heat build there and further down. Only God knew what that said about you.

James nodded, trying to slip past Joel. Luke got up as well, ready to follow his friend out. “I didn’t hear you say it. Out loud, now.”

“I-I won’t talk or look at her again. S-Sorry about that.” He stuttered.

“Good. Don’t apologize to me though.” Joel said, signaling over to you.

“I’m sorry, ___. It-It won’t happen again.” You nodded, acknowledging him, waving him away.

The two of them scurried away like the rats they were. Good riddance. You looked at Joel who was now sitting at the bar. “Jesus, Joel...”

He scoffed, “What? Was that not okay? He was harrassin-”

“I think you’ve gotten softer in your old age.” You chimed in. Joel stared at you, confused as to what the hell you were talking about.

“Excuse me?” He asked. “I told him I’d beat him so bad he’d be disfigured and that was soft?”

You laughed, finishing up the last of the cleaning before close. “Yeah. The old Joel I knew would deck a guy for saying something to me.”

Joel sat there a moment as he recalled the night at the bar where he broke a man's jaw for calling you a slut. He smiled lightly, “That’s right. You’re right... maybe I have gotten soft.”

Your eyes rolled as you grabbed your winter jacket and throwing it on, “Come on, softie. Walk me home.”

Joel obliged, getting up from his seat and following you out of the mess hall. The two of you walked into the frigid air, almost instantly shivering from the lack of warmth the place provided you. The sun had set a long time ago, leaving the milky blue hues of the night appear next to the luminescence of the moon. It was a sight. You stared up at the floating rock in the sky, entranced by its beauty. If everything in this world has changed, the moon stayed the same. You were a big fan. You were so engrossed in the way the moonlight shined; you had no clue someone was doing the same but to you. Joel walked with you, paying no mind to the road ahead of him. His eyes were on your frame, on the swell of your breasts, on your lips. He noted how your irises twinkled as you peered up to sky. It caused a lump to form in his throat, his heart rate picking up as he tried to swallow it down.

“Hey, Joel?” You asked suddenly, his gaze quickly leaving you as you looked to him.

“Yeah? What’s up?” He replied, clearing his throat.

“Back there… in the mess. I could have handled that myself.”

Joel was taken aback for a moment before chuckling softly, “Oh, darlin’ I know. He should have been more scared of what you were gonna do to him instead of me.”

You laughed back, nudging Joel on the shoulder with your own, “I mean it! I would have tore him apart had you not been there.”

Joel smiled, “I know, I know. Maybe I just wanted some points in my favor with you. Make me look cooler, maybe make you like me more.” He continued.

You looked at him with a confused face, “Like you more? Joel, I’m not sure if that’s even possible. I think I like you too much.” Your nerves started getting the better of you as you realized what you’d just said. Joel’s eyes widened but only for a second. He started slowing his steps down as he turned to you, “Like me too much, huh?”

“Just forget I said it.” You piped in quickly, trying to back track.

“Don’t think I can do that, darlin’.” Joel said, stopping you from going any further. He wrapped his calloused hand around your wrist, lightly pulling you to him. Your eyes softened as you looked up to the man, your cheeks reddening under the yellow-toned streetlight the two of you stood under. You wanted to look away. You didn’t want Joel to see the way he so easily made you blush. “Stop hiding from me. You look so pretty, tonight. You always do.” Joel placed his free hand under your jaw, leading your eyes to meet his.

“Why can’t you forget I said anything?” You hushed, entranced in the way he was looking at you. Like you were the most precious thing in the world. He just laughed, bringing his hand from your wrist to the other side of your face. “Don’t want to. Think I might like you too much, too.”

You smiled, heart racing, stomach flipping; everything. You brought your hands up to Joel’s jacket, running over the wrinkles until you hit his neck and kept them there. Snowflakes began to litter from the sky and danced around the two of you, melting as soon as they hit your bodies. “Well, Joel Miller. If you like me so much, why don’t you kiss me?”

“Can I?” he asked softly, nudging his nose with yours as he closed the space between you. All you could do was nod as your words failed. That’s all he needed before his lips were on yours. His soft lips met yours, only a little chapped. You moved with him as he kissed you, one of his hands wrapping around the back of your neck while the other fell to the nape of your spine. Your own hands wrapping around his neck and lacing through the bottom of his hair. You both stood there for what felt like forever, just enjoying the embrace. At one point Joel nipped the bottom of your lip, asking for an entrance. Your tongues moved and intertwined with each other as Joel deepened it even more. You didn’t want to break away as you were quite literally seeing stars and hearing fireworks but Joel stepped away first. “We-We need to stop, baby girl.” He said breathlessly.

“Why? I want to kiss you more.” You insisted, moving your head to kiss him again.

Joel grinned, pecking you again lightly once, twice, maybe a third time. “Trust me. I need to kiss you more. But not here.” You agreed with him as you pulled him further down the street. It was a straight shot to your house when suddenly Joel stopped again.

“What’s wrong?” You asked.

He hesitated, his face etched in concern. “You’re not gonna regret taking me home with you, are you?”

Your eyebrows pulled together as you looked at him like he’d said something ridiculous, because it was. “Joel, do you think I’d regret it?”

He hesitated, unsure of himself, “Don’t know... ‘S why I’m asking you. Don’t want you mixed up with the ‘crazy old guy’.”

You paused a moment, almost laughing at how silly it was. You walked right back up to Joel, placing both of your hands on his cheeks a pulled him into you, kissing him once again. It was full of intensity. You wanted to show Joel just how badly you wanted him, crazy or not. Hell, you were old too. Joel fell naturally into it, wrapping his arms around your body. He chased your lips like he was addicted. It sent you soaring. After a moment, you pulled away, “Come on. Take me to bed.”

Joel placed his forehead against yours, holding you to his body. You could hear the heavy, desperate breaths coming from him like he was wagering with himself. Joel cupped your face once again, his lips ghosting over yours before whispering, “Let’s go.”

The trip to your bedroom was hazy. You were so out of your mind with want for this man you were shaking. As soon as you both entered your room and the door was shut, Joel was at you. He shed you of the thick winter jacket you had on and the fleece sweater under that. You did the same to him, pushing off his coat and flannel in one go. Your lips met fiercely, your hands running up his chest to his neck, pulling him closer. You wanted to be engulfed in him in every way. It scared you a bit at how much you wanted him in this moment, how much you needed him. You shivered at the lack of clothing as Joel pulled your jeans down, leaving you in your bra and underwear. He stepped away but only for a moment as he discarded his shirt and worked on his pants. His eyes ever left your body. His breath grew heavy again, watching the way his chest puffed up and down. You could see the strain of his length, begging to be released as he stepped out of his own pants and returned to your body.

Joel kissed from your clavicle to your neck, biting and sucking as he saw fit. You moaned as you wrapped your arms around him, scratching his back lightly. He grunted, shuddering from the pain as it turned into pleasure. Joel grinded against you, his erection poking your belly. Your hand flew down to it, rubbing him through the fabric of his boxers. He sighed, kissing up your jaw to your mouth as he fucked into your hand. “f-fuck, baby girl. You’re drivin’ me insane.” He stuttered, his hands at your panties as he slid them down. He left them just below your ass, gripping your cheeks and kneading them in his large hands. You moaned again, your own hand slipping into his underwear as you continued your ministries. His cock was already slick with precum. God, he was so needy for you. Never in his life had he had a desire this intense. Both your bodies felt like fire as your fingertips danced over the expanse of each other’s skin.

You were just as desperate. You could feel the wetness drip from your folds on to where your underwear sat, your swollen bud just aching to be played with. It’s like Joel could sense that, as one of his hands left your ass and dipped inside of you. He circled your clit slowly at first which you could have cried at. You needed more. You bucked your hips into his hand and he got the hint, picking up his speed. You both stood there at the side of your bed, getting each other off. Both moaning into each other’s mouth, licking up his jaw as he did to yours.

“Baby, need to be inside of you. F-fuck, I’m goin’ crazy.” He breathed; his breath muted as he spoke against your lips. You were already so close from Joel working so hard on your clit, but you knew coming around his cock would be way more gratifying. You nodded, separating yourself from him as you shucked your bra off and climbed on to your mattress, minding the way you wiggled your behind ever-so-slightly to which Joel moaned out loud at. Joel rid himself from his boxers and climbed over to you, hovering over your body as he pecked hot, open-mouthed kisses up your body.

“You’re so f-fucking beautiful.” He spoke, eyes on you. Your own eyes rolled as you wrapped your hands around his neck pulling him in for another kiss.

“Quit buttering me up, Miller.” You sighed, licking a strip up his tongue. Joel’s grip on your waist tightened. He was so hard it was beginning to hurt. “Not doing no such thing, darlin’. You’re so fuckin’ pretty. Look at how hard you get me. Been doing this to me a while now. Just lookin’ at you, I could cum.” His words went straight into your heat as you clenched around nothing. You needed him in you or you’d quite literally die.

“Oh yeah? How long you been touching yourself to me?” You asked, your hand returning to his cock as you lined him up at your entrance. Joel slid his leaking tip in between your folds, running it up to your clit, rubbing there for a moment.

He laughed softly, “Long time, baby girl. Here and there before. But now that you’re here with me again; it’s almost every night.” Your back arched at his confession. There’d been many nights you’d lay awake since you moved to Jackson. Your mind thinking of the events of the day, but they’d always end up on Joel. They way he’d sip from his glass of whiskey, or bourbon. The way he’d come into the mess hall after a patrol, always a little disheveled and sweaty. Or the way he was always so intense with you, never looking away when you spoke, when you laughed. How he’d always find a way to have a hand on you, just to be as close as possible.

“Joel, put it in, fuck- all the way. Please fuck me.” You begged, your legs wrapping around his waist.

“You ready for me, sweetheart?” He asked, teasing your needy hole with his tip, pushing it in slowly. You nodded, lips back on his. Joel pushed himself in easily. You were beyond ready for him. He gasped at the sensation. He loved the feeling of his cock being swallowed up by you. He looked down at your cunt as he bottomed out, moaning at the sight.

“Jesus... you take me so well. Y’always have. Like you were made for me.”

His words sent you spiraling, your eyes rolling back as you felt his fat cock fill you up. He started at a slower pace that was still intense. His lips on yours as he kissed into your open mouth. You couldn’t help the moans and sighs that escaped your reddened, plump lips, abused from Joel’s own. Joel pumped into you, your slick mixing with his as you both created a symphony of wispy moans and slaps against each other’s skin. It was fucking beautiful. His hand pushed the stray hairs away from your face as he picked up speed, thrusting into you as the claps became louder. “Yes-s, take it. Let me see that pretty face of yours. So fucked out ‘cause of me.”

You loved how vocal he was. It was a driving force as he slammed into you, on the edge of his high. You were right behind him, the coil in the pit of your stomach on the verge of snapping. Joel’s thumb worked on your swollen bud again, circling quickly as he wanted you to come with him.

“Joel I-I'm so close, fuck!” You cried out, your arm thrown over your eyes as he rutted into you.

“Move that arm of yours, wanna see you when you come for me.” You obeyed, your arms wrapping back around his neck pulling him down to you. Joel kept his pace steady, and with a few more flicks of his thumb, you were unraveling. Your hand flew to his hair, gripping it as you moaned, calling out his name. Joel felt your cunt tighten around him, gripping him to you. “Yes, fuck, take it! ’s all yours, baby. Always yours.” His pace slowed; you felt the hot ropes of cum filling any leftover space inside you, coating you. Tears pricked your eyes as he continued the remainder of his thrusting, everything becoming too much.

Joel’s softened dick slid out of you and was replaced by two of his long fingers, “Don’t want you to waste a drop. Keep it all in, baby doll.”

Your eyes closed; body enamored with pleasure as your legs shook from the af effects of your orgasm. Joel collapsed on to you, pecking your chest and neck with more kisses and love bites. His hands found their way up to your hair and weaved into it. He wanted you close, but you weren’t going anywhere.

The room was quiet besides the sounds of both yours and Joel’s labored breaths. You could hear your heartbeat in your ears as you basked in the comfortable silence. It was a while before either of you spoke. You actually thought Joel had fallen asleep which sucked, cause while you loved him being on top of you, he was getting heavy.

“Do you regret it?” He spoke suddenly.

You pushed yourself up onto your elbows as you peered down to the older man on you. You looked at him incredulously, like you’d been shocked. “Regret what we just did?” He nodded slowly, eyes on yours.

“Joel,” You began, fully sitting up as you pulled him with you, “Why would you even ask that?”

“I just... Dunno. Just feel like you could do better than an old, crazy guy. Lots of guys ‘round here dying to have you even look at ‘em.”

You sighed, your shoulders slumping. Your hand reached out to Joel’s face, petting the grayed scruff on his jaw. You took some time to figure out how to say exactly what you were feeling, even then it was hard to explain. “If you think that, genuinely; You really must be an old, crazy man.” You laughed, trying to lighten the mood.

“I don’t think you realize that I am absolutely in love with you, Joel Miller.” Joel’s breath hitched as his eyes widened slightly. His heartrate picked back up. He really wasn’t expecting to hear that.

“Not Luke. Not James. No one else. Ever. I get that might be a lot to place on you so sudd-”

Before you could even end your sentence, Joel’s lips were on yours again. He kissed you so deeply, so passionately, that you could have exploded. Your body was so warm even with the bite of the negative temperatures outside. He pulled you on to his lap and just... held you. He held you so delicately, like you’d break with any amount of pressure. After a moment, he broke away and maybe you were just seeing things, but you could have sworn you saw a little tear drop, threatening to fall. Your eyes glazed over, tears of your own beckoning an appearance. You truly were just so in love with him, it was crazy. You’d only been reunited a few months back but, it was as if you’d spent the last 21 years with him. It felt as though no time was spent apart at all. Things between you just worked so naturally and flowed so well. Like you were made for him, just as he said. And as though he were made for you.

Another comfortable silence lingered in the air. You both just genuinely enjoyed the presence of one another. Joels hands rested at your waist, one them made its way to your back, rubbing small circles on to your skin. His head fell into you, resting just above your breast as he breathed you in. Your own hand had moved to his hair, scratching his head lightly.

Joel sucked in a big breath of air before speaking, “Don’t think I’ve heard those words in a couple’a decades.” You nodded along with him. It’d been a long time for you too. Joel looked up to you, too comfortable to move any further. His eyes glimmered as he looked into yours. It was as if you held the universe within those orbs of yours. He couldn’t look away.

“I am absolutely in love with you too, my sweet girl.” Now it was your turn to be surprised even if you weren’t really. Not like you’d been expecting him to say it, but it was still something. You couldn’t help but smile as a tear fell. You didn’t want to cry, not at all. But you couldn’t help it. Your body swelled with emotion as every cavity of you filled with love and admiration for this worn-down man in front of you. Both of you changed in so many ways, some for the better, maybe some for worse. But when you really looked at it, not so much was different. He was still Joel Miller, and he was yours.

“Good.” Was all you could say as more tears threatened to fall.

Joel smiled, a small laugh escaping his lips. “Good.”

taglist: @paleidiot, @aestheticangel612

i hope u all like this part! soft joel is my absolute weakness and i love writing him. i think i might take some requests so if anyone has any ideas for Joel Miller or even Din Djarin :o i’d be glad to see them! also lemme know if anyone else would like to be added to a taglist <3

likes and reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed <3

#pedro pascal #joel miller #joel miller x reader #tlou #the last of us #joel x reader #fanfiction #please lemme know if yall like it hehe

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