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obeymeoasis · 3 years

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Demon Bros React: MC Is Insecure

Warnings: mentions of insecurity surrounding body image, physical appearance, self-worth.

Lucifer

It was the day after a party Diavolo had thrown at his castle. You had had fun for the most part, dancing with the brothers and eating delicious foods prepared by Barbatos.

But you also remembered how it had felt to look around the room and realize you were surrounded by gorgeous demons, not a single flaw on anyone’s face. Doubt and insecurity had begun to creep into your mind, and that feeling had carried over into the next day.

You had only talked briefly with Lucifer at the party because he was too busy interacting with Diavolo’s guests. Every time you tried to catch his eye, you noticed how beautiful whoever he was talking to was and found yourself swallowing down your greeting.

Currently Lucifer was at his desk like always, scribbling down notes and shuffling through papers. You brought him afternoon tea and sat reading in one of his armchairs to keep him company.

You had been telling yourself that you were going to ask him the question that was burning in your mind, but an hour had already passed since you first came in. You tried to distract yourself with your book but the words were fuzzy on the page. Finally, you spoke. “Luci?”

He didn’t look up from his desk when he answered, “Yes, love?”

“Do you... do you ever wish I was more beautiful?”

The scratching of his pen stopped immediately and Lucifer lowered the papers he was holding to show his face, a carefully blank expression revealing nothing. “What exactly do you mean by that question?”

“I mean exactly what I asked. Do you ever wish I was more beautiful? More attractive? As the Avatar of Pride have you ever been... embarrassed to be seen with me?”

At this Lucifer’s expression grew cold and furious. “Has someone... made you feel this way? Has someone made you feel as if you are inadequate?” You shook your head sadly and whispered, “No, just my own brain.”

“Ah, I see. Well pet, I don’t ever wish you were more beautiful because you are the most beautiful being I’ve ever seen. So it would be physically impossible for you to be more beautiful than you are now.”

You snorted. “Luci, that was so cheesy. Your brothers would throw up if they heard what you just said.” Lucifer’s lips quirked up in amusement. “Well, I’m glad I was able to make you laugh. And I do mean what I said. I’ve never once felt embarrassed to be with you; you are my pride, the source of my happiness. If anyone were to suggest otherwise, I would gladly kill them.”

“Luci, we’ve been over this. You can’t just kill everyone who is mildly rude to me.”

Lucifer went back to working on his papers but there was a gentle smile on his face. “Darling, you’ll find that I definitely can. I have a permit.”

Mammon

You were regretting tagging along to one of Mammon’s photo shoots. At first, it seemed like a fun idea getting to look at all the clothes, makeup, and jewelry. Plus, you really wanted to see what Mammon was like when he was working professionally.

It was fun at first, you cooing over how handsome Mammon looked in his outfit and watching him get all flustered and blushy. But then the actual photoshoot started and you watched as Mammon posed with a stunning model.

You tried to not let your insecurities get the best of you. You were here to support Mammon! But as the shoot progressed you couldn’t help but start to compare yourself, keeping track of how they were more beautiful and you more flawed.

The photographer stopped to take a break and Mammon immediately bounced over to you. “MC, did you see me? How does it feel to watch the Great Mammon in his natural element? I look good, don’t I?”

You caressed Mammon’s cheek and feigned a bright smile. “You were amazing Mammon! You look so handsome. And this is such a cool outfit!” But Mammon was somehow always able to tell when you were faking a good mood and he frowned. “MC, is something wrong? You look sad. Did something happen?”

You opened your mouth, an excuse ready on your lips, but found you couldn’t lie right to Mammon’s face. You gestured toward the model who was talking to their manager in the corner. “Do you ever wish I looked like that?”

Mammon cocked his head, confused. “Do I ever wish you had blue hair? Not particularly? Although now that I think about it, blue hair would look cool on you too.”

You sighed. “No, I mean do you ever wish I looked like a model? Sexier? Or prettier?” Mammon thought for a moment, processing your question, and then frowned. “Oh no no no. Treasure, what’s this all about? What happened?”

“Sorry Mams, I didn’t want to distract you while you’re working. I just got really low and insecure all of a sudden. Started thinking about how you should be with someone really beautiful, you know? And sometimes I feel like that’s not me.”

Clearly upset, Mammon rushed to give you a crushing hug, tucking your head underneath his chin. “MC I- I wish I could beam my thoughts into your head. That way you’d really believe me when I say that you’re so precious to me. Every day I wake up and think about how lucky I am to be with you.”

You chuckled a little. “I do put up a lot with you, don’t I.” Mammon gently smacked you on your back. “Hey! I’ve been good lately! But seriously MC, you are stunning. You are gorgeous. And it’s okay if you don’t believe me right now because- because I’ll tell you as many times as you need me to! I’ll tell you a thousand times a day! A million times!”

You tried to blink away the tears in your eyes and held onto Mammon even tighter. “Thanks Mams, I love you so much.”

“Love you too treasure. Your first man’s gonna take care of you, don’t you worry about a thing.”

Leviathan

Usually you liked watching anime with Levi; it was one of your favorite things to do together. Levi was always more happy and lively when watching with you because he was able to express his opinions freely without judgment. And you thought it was adorable how excited Levi got over his favorite characters and storylines.

Today, you were snuggled together on some cushions re-watching an episode of “The Magical Ruri Hanai: Demon Girl”. At first you were enjoying the episode, laughing as Ruri got used to the oddities of the human world. But Levi’s repeated comments about how cute Ruri-chan was, which you usually never minded, started to bother you a bit.

You took a quick glance around the room, noting Levi’s enormous collection of Ruri-chan posters, figurines, and other merch. Levi tapped you on the knee, interrupting your thoughts. “MC, you’re missing the best part! What are you looking at?”

You sighed a little, struggling to act nonchalant. “Sorry Levi, it’s nothing. I’m still watching.” Frowning, Levi paused the episode and turned to look at you. “Hey, what’s up?”

Taking a deep breath, you said “Levi, I’m not Ruri-chan.” He narrowed his eyes in confusion. “Yes... I know?”

You continued, “I don’t look like Ruri-chan. Does that bother you?”

“Does it bother me... that you don’t look like an anime character?” He repeated the question slowly, as if you had asked him the strangest question in the world.

Frustrated, you blurted out “I don’t look like Ruri-chan! I’m never going to be as cute as her!”

Levi looked completely bewildered, his eyes wide and staring at you in confusion. “B-But you are cute! MC, w-what are you even talking about?”

Embarrassed at your outburst you looked down at the floor silently. Levi scooted over toward you so that your knees were touching and he waited until you broke the silence. “Sometimes I wonder if I’m good enough. I think maybe you’d like it if I looked cuter or acted cuter, like the characters in anime.”

Levi hesitated for a moment before quickly grabbing onto your hand, blushing furiously as he did so. "MC, I-I already think you're c-cute. Really really cute. So don't say things like that. And also, I like you because you're you! Not because you're like someone else."

"And you make me really happy. I'm just a gross otaku. I never thought I'd be able to... to find someone like you. Someone who accepts me."

He tried to lock eyes with you but blushed even harder and stared at your joined hands. "Plus, I couldn't to-touch an anime character. But I can touch you. I can hold your hand or give you hugs whenever you need it, o-okay?"

You leaned your head onto Levi's shoulder and closed your eyes, letting the peaceful silence wash over you.

Satan

You were accompanying Satan on a trip to one of his favorite stores: an antique shop that sold all manner of rare books and artifacts. The owner, Ms. Sparrow, was a friend of Satan’s and she welcomed the two of you wholeheartedly.

Today, she looked as gorgeous as she always did. Her chic pearl dress and matching silk gloves shone against her dark skin. Not a curl in her hair was out of place and even the click-clack of her heels on the floor seemed melodious somehow.

You left Satan to look at the books and went wandering off into the various aisles of the store, marveling at all the bits and bobs. In one of the over-stuffed corners you happened to find a glittering silver key on a red velvet ribbon. Taking it in your hand, you went back through to show it off to Satan, wanting to ask him what he thought it opened.

But Satan was busy chatting and laughing with Ms. Sparrow. You watched the two of them for a moment and noticed how well they complimented each other. Both had a certain poise, a kind of confidence and certainty in their movements.

On your walk back to the dorms, you were unusually quiet and Satan noticed. “Pet, is something the matter?”

You hesitated, wondering if Satan was going to find your insecurity childish. “Satan, I’m not very....elegant.”

“Yes, I know. You choked on a piece of bread yesterday. The day before that you tripped over absolutely nothing and fell down.” He smiled, expecting for you to get riled up, but it fell when he saw that you looked dejected. “Love, what is the matter? Have I upset you?”

You avoided his gaze. “Sometimes... sometimes I wonder if I bring you down by being with you. I feel like you deserve someone elegant and sophisticated. Someone who matches you. But I’m not. I’m clumsy and messy and not perfect, like Ms. Sparrow.”

Satan’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Ms. Sparrow? What does she have anything to with this?” He turned you around so that you were facing him. “Pet, please look at me. I love you. And I’m not with you in spite of you being clumsy or messy. I love you because you’re clumsy and messy, because those are parts of you and I love all of you.”

He leaned down to press his forehead against yours. “And why would I need someone perfect? Am I perfect? Yesterday you saw me screaming at my cup because I accidentally spilled some tea and burned my finger.”

You shrugged while giggling, “I thought it was a perfectly reasonable response.” You wrapped your arms around his and buried your face into his shoulder. “Thanks, Satan. You always know how to make me feel better.”

He reached down to give you a gentle kiss. “Anytime, love. I’m always here for you.”

Asmodeus

Asmo has a lot of fans across all his social media accounts. That was made perfectly clear the first time you went on a date with him outside. Sitting in the trendy coffeeshop, several people had come up to ask him for a picture or an autograph. He was never shy about you and always introduced you as his sweetheart, cooing about how beautiful you were.

Some days it was okay. You loved seeing the bubbly social-butterfly side of Asmo. He was always so sweet to everyone who came up to him and genuinely enjoyed meeting new people. But other days, your insecurity rose up like a huge wave and dampened everything.

This particular day you were shopping with Asmo in a new boutique that had opened up. You were aimlessly flicking through the racks of clothes when you heard a large squealing.

Two demons ran up to Asmo, talking and gesturing excitedly. You could make out that they followed him on Devilgram and were asking if he was willing to take a picture with them. These demons were some of the most attractive beings you had ever seen. Their clothes were incredibly stylish and their hair and makeup were done flawlessly.

Looking around the shop, in all of the full length mirrors you could see the reflection of Asmo and his beautiful fans. And you looked out of place, like a puzzle piece that didn’t fit in at all.

Tearing up, you grabbed a random pair of jeans off the rack and ran into a changing room. You turned away from the mirror, not wanting to look at yourself, and took deep breaths to try and keep from bursting into sobs. After a few moments Asmo began looking for you, having finished taking pictures. “Sweetheart, are you changing? Let me see what you’re wearing when you’re done!”

At the sound of his voice you burst into tears and your attempts to muffle the noise were futile. Outside the door, Asmo’s voice sounded panicked. “Darling, are you okay? What’s the matter? Please come outside, whatever it is please let me help you!” You hesitated, not wanting to face him, but this made him even more frantic. He started jiggling the doorknob and knocking on the door.

You opened it, afraid that he would accidentally break the doorknob leaving you trapped inside. As soon as he saw you he gathered you in his arms and began making shushing noises while smoothing your hair. “Sweetheart, why are you crying? Please talk to me, please tell me what’s wrong.”

You tried to get the words out in between sobs and hiccups. “A-Asmo, don’t you want someone m-more beautiful? Someone who-who looks g-good with you?” Asmo paused for a moment, processing your words, and then his eyes burned with anger. “Sweetheart, did one of my fans say something mean to you? Did someone make you feel like this?”

You shook your head vigorously. “No, just me.” Asmo breathed a sigh of relief at hearing no one had harrassed you and resumed smoothing your hair. “Oh, darling. You ARE beautiful. You’re stunning, sweetheart. I wish you could see the way I saw you, how adorable and gorgeous you are. And I understand that there are going to be days when you don’t believe me, when you feel like you’re not. But at least don’t go through those days alone, okay?”

You nodded, not trusting yourself to speak without tearing up again.

"Now, let's go get some ice cream. We can eat it while taking a bubble bath."

Beelzebub

You weren’t really sure why Beel liked you coming with him to the gym all the time, even if you didn’t exercise. He said your presence was calming and that it made him focus better, which was odd because a lot of the time you just sat on an unoccupied machine and scrolled through your D.D.D.

Today was much the same, with Beel running on the treadmill and you watching some videos. The gym was pretty empty, just a few students exercising here and there.

Your eyes drifted to Beel who was running without even breaking a sweat. His body was all solid muscle: his arms, legs, and abs looked perfectly chiseled and toned. Last week you accidentally ran into Beel in the hallway and it felt like you had smashed into a brick wall. Beel, on the other hand, was completely fine.

You began to wonder what Beel thought about your body. He could be pretty handsy at times and he wasn’t shy in his affections. But what if there was something he didn’t like? Something that he thought needed changing?

He’s never mentioned anything about exercising to you before. But you thought back to the students you had seen in this gym: all of them were extremely fit with incredible bodies. You couldn’t help but start to compare yourself to them and think that maybe you were lacking.

Just then, Beel finished his run and walked over to you. You weren’t sure what kind of facial expression you were making but it seemed enough to concern him because he asked, “MC, is everything okay?”

“Hey Beel... do you ever wish I had a nicer body?”

He squinted in confusion. “What do you mean by ‘a nicer body’?”

“I don’t know... just better. Whatever nicer looks like for you.”

Beel was quiet for a moment, thinking. “No, I've never wished for that before. I still don't know what you mean by 'nicer'. I love you. And I love your body because its yours. The only thing that matters to me is whether you’re happy. And as long as I'm still allowed to touch you, then I'm happy.”

He looked at you nervously then, biting his lip. "Am I... still allowed to touch you?"

You laughed and reached to give him a hug, loving how safe it felt in his arms. "Of course, big guy. Thanks for making me feel better. You always know what to say."

Beel flushed with pride and closed his eyes in happiness, leaning into your hand as you patted him on the head.

Belphegor

You knew you were dreaming because you were sitting in a R.A.D classroom surrounded by fellow students, but you couldn’t focus on any of their faces. They were blurry, as if someone had smudged them like an artist had smudged some charcoal.

You were at your desk, looking around the classroom, when as if on cue all of the students began to slowly gather around you. They stood there silently for a moment, unmoving, and you felt a shiver go up your spine.

And then one by one the students began to hurl insults at you.

“You’re not good enough. Not good enough for Belphegor.” “You’re ugly, you’re hideous. “You’re unwanted, go back to where you came from.” “You don’t deserve what you have, don’t deserve good.” “You’re weak.” “You ruin others, you ruin everything.”

As they insulted you the students began to draw themselves closer, pushing and shoving to reach you. They almost made a cover over your desk as if to block out all the light. You hunched over your desk, shaking and panicking, trying to curl up to protect yourself.

One of the demons began shaking your shoulder roughly, you yelping in pain. He began yelling in your ear, “Wake up! Wake up!”

“MC! Wake up!”

You startled awake and looked around the room in fear. You were in Belphie’s bed, your pajamas sticking to you with sweat. Belphie was looking at you with concern, one hand still on your shoulder.

“MC, you’re okay. It’s just me. It was just a nightmare.” You let out a sob and buried yourself in his arms while he patted you on the back until your breaths evened out.

“D-Did you see my dream?” you asked. You were nervous about showing Belphie that weak side of you, the insecurities that had been brewing since the two of you had begun a relationship. He looked apologetic. “I did. You were whimpering and shaking in your sleep. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

He reached over, one hand smoothing your hair, the fingers of his other hand interlaced with yours. “None of what they said was true, you know.” You looked down, embarrassed. “I mean it, MC. You are good enough. You’re beautiful, you’re wanted, you deserve all the nice and beautiful things in the world, you’re strong. And most importantly, you lift others up. You lift me up everyday.”

He lifted up your hand and pressed a kiss against it. “You lifted me out of darkness. I love you so much. And I’ll gladly stay by your side, for as long as you’ll have me.”

You grabbed the front of his sweater to draw him into a rough kiss, lips bruising. “Forever, Belphie. Forever.”

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tantou · 2 years

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hello may i please have a shisui take because im struggling to write him and you're the authority 🥺🥺

nrjendfjdf 🥺 omg little ol me... THIS IS KIND OF A BROAD QUESTION AND I'M SOMEWHAT PEA BRAINED but I shall try to deliver. forgive me for my disorganized rambling I am extremely unmedicated.

under a read more because this got embarrassingly long

oh boy. shisui. where to start with this guy. listen I know he was on screen for all of 5 minutes but he contains multitudes inside my head and heart ok.

i'll start by listing off what we Do know about shisui!

in the databook he is described as honest and warmhearted (;-;) and I feel like that's a basic but pretty good assessment yeah. itachi himself told naruto that he felt shisui was a lot like him (you have shisui's soul) (lots to unpack there) HIS AGE IS UNCONFIRMED EVERYWHERE so we're only going off theories but I think its generally accepted that he's 3yrs older than itachi so! he graduated the academy at age 7, top of his class, and in that same year he uh. kinda sorta. let envy get the best of him and let his teammate die an avoidable death, unlocking his mangekyo. and he only revealed this to itachi when he was about to die lmao. he became a jonin at 11 and danzo ended his shit at around 16? the rest is fuzzy because kishi only created him cuz he realized he needed a way for itachi to unlock his own mangekyo sooo. that's where fanon jumps in

i think most of the fandom characterizes him as Itachi's silly little friend that follows him around and cracks jokes and that's fine and everything but! i do wanna point out that the only time we see him act in such a way is when he's around itachi and sasuke, two people he's very close with, and without any info on his mother and knowing that shisui's father was in poor health and likely passed while shisui was still pretty young, we could assume itachi and sasuke are the people he is closest to, period. so it's only natural that he would be comfortable enough to let his guard down around them like that, but the same cannot be said for random villagers or his fellow jonin etc. don't me wrong i think generally he's seen as a very kind and dependable shinobi, very loyal and always willing to lend a hand to those in need, but still yknow is competent and professional and Lethal. i mean. the guy had a flee on sight order in every enemy nation and earned a big name for himself while other kids his age were eating playdoh or making paper airplanes in class. he was a big deal, danzo himself refered to shisui as the strongest uchiha of his time (which i think is very fucking funny btw like fuck fugaku i guess jNFDJF) i am Getting Off Track my bad

ITS HARD TO PIN HIM DOWN TBH especially depending on what you consider canon or not. in the show he's fairly serious, in the ova he is a teddy bear, in the novel he's very Big Bro-like. in the novel anime fillers he is. my sweet baby angel he's very focused on mentoring itachi and its clear that shisui is very good at reading itachi from the start. across the board i wanna say he can feel the stress and stiffness radiating off itachi in waves and he just. wants to help. he knows exactly what buttons to push and how to rustle his feathers and how to set him at ease as well. oh no rox we're getting off track again fuck ITS HARD TO TALK ABT SHISUI AND NOT BRING UP ITACHI they were lichrally besties. okok.

i think the lighthearted cheeky interpretation of him is fine, I do think he's the type to make bad jokes in uncomfortable situations in an attempt to lighten the mood, but, yknow he tries to be sensitive about things either way. we're shown he's analytical and smart and fairly cautious. and he's uchiha, so he's got big big feelings tucked inside his little body. i imagine he carries a lot of grief inside that he doesn't let people see, his priority is helping others and he doesn't want anyone to fuss over him. Silly Characters That Are Profoundly Sad flavored apple juice. his teammate died because of his jealousy and his father fell ill after the war and shisui took on the responsibility of being the breadwinner of the family, which is A Lot for a young kid? in the novel he mentions that his father doesn't recognize him anymore, sounding like he's trying to fight off the sadness he feels and quickly changes the subject because he doesn't want to worry itachi. shisui takes on a lot of burdens and he would've kept taking on even more had danzo not stopped his plan to use kotoamatsukami on the clan and. brainwash them. (imagine walking around the uchiha compound knowing your clan is under an unbreakable genjutsu /you/ put them under) which is terribly fucked up but i think it shows what happens when kids are given these godlike powers? itachi and shisui were running out of time. they knew they needed to find a solution /fast/ to avoid civil war. we saw what happened with itachi and how far he went lol but shisui wasn't far behind him? it's hard to say if he would've gone along with the whole. slaughtering the clan thing. part of me wants to say he would've been naive enough to go along with it like itachi did. shisui himself said he was willing to do whatever it took to keep itachi and sasuke together as a family. maybe his idea of love was just as fucked up as itachi's? if things had turned out differently, would he have turned his sword against the clan himself? alleviating itachi of that burden, getting his hands dirty if it meant his two most important people were kept safe? he's shouldered guilt and grief before and survived, partly because he had itachi in his life, "spending time with you helped me pick myself up again, bit by bit. I'm really grateful to you,"

i don;t know if i see him being close to many people really? i think he almost doesn't trust himself enough for that.

imo he is an opportunist. he knows ppl perceive him as charming and trustworthy and he will use that to his advantage! not above flirting with people to try and get information out of them if the situation calls for it

overall i think shisui's someone that's capable of carrying a lot of darkness and keeping it hidden behind a smile. he's an uchiha, morals often go out the window when Love is involved. I JUST THINK EXPLORING A DARKER SIDE OF HIM WOULD B FUN

good god i talk so mcuh my bad DO I GET INTO THE CRACK HCS NOW? he is a MESS in the kitchen. worse than itachi, nearly sets the place on fire each and every time but somehow? the food always comes out great?? 0/10 process 10/10 result. (7/10 if u ask itachi but that's only bc he's salty about his own cooking skills)

he was always super physically affectionate w itachi and I feel like. he might've grown up touch starved himself? constantly training and taking on missions, his father was unavailable and. in my head I imagine his mother dipped soon after his death so shisui was just. abandoned. deeply lonely but tried to not make it obvious. eventually itachi takes notice of this and starts inviting him over for dinner a lot. insists shisui spends the holidays at his house so he won't have to celebrate alone. oh that's not crack that's just sad huh

is it fucked up that in a modern high school au i always imagine him being the captain of the swim team LMAO. cracking open a sugar free redbull at 6:30am. stayed up til 2am playing cod the night before. no wait he wouldn't play cod unless he's playing against obito, PERSONALLY I think he'd be into the uncharted game series or assassins creed or hades

he orders the most annoying elaborate starbucks secret menu drinks and itachi is EMBARRASSED to be seen with him in public. he's gonna ask for 15 pumps of this and 20 shakes of that but at least he leaves a good tip.

i think a lot about him and obito being good friends in an au where yknow Everyone lives and nothing bad happens. "race u to the hokages office" "who can make itachi laugh first" "bet I can drink more sake than u can" etc generally just giving itachi a massive headache

he's extremely observant and quick to pick up on any little changes or mood shifts. he respects his elders but Does like to push his luck sometimes, only because he knows he can get away with it.

he'd indulge itachi's sweet tooth a lot, take him out for dango or ice cream when he can tell itachi's just brooding at home or has been nonstop training for hours. he also strikes me as a big gift giver? he's not one to really overthink it, if he sees smth he thinks someone might like or need he'll pick it up for them. i like hcing that itachi's necklace was a gift from shisui aha </3 gifts could be anything from jewelry to a new set of shuriken to an Air Fryer or a funny-looking stuffed frog plushie.

i think my brains shutting down i've been rambling for 3hrs and I feel like I said a whole lotta nothing kJNDFDKJFN I'm sorry this is so long but this is what happens when u ask an adhd riddled gemini abt their fav boy

#[out of breath] if you.......want more.......u know where to find me owo7 #SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO ANSWER FJDJSK #and good luck writing :D!!#ask

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apriorisea · 3 years

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Ok I’m seriously convinced you’re secretly one of the members...(Joonie is that u???) loool but for real, you write their personalities so well. So not a request, but a question?? Their “concepts” aside (like, “golden maknae etc”)... key personality traits & flaws for each of the boys? Like “passionate, sensitive, a perfectionist, or overly self-critical, etc” Which member(s) is hardest to write?Hope this made sense, I’m just super interested in your take on this :)

--First off, you’re so nice!!! Thank you so much:) And also, thank you for this question! I love things like this---even though it’s obviously all just my personal speculation 😅I listed my thoughts down below, but I would love to hear any thoughts (whether in agreement or disagreement!) anyone else might have! As for which member is hardest to write, for me I typically struggle a little more with Taehyung and Hoseok. For Taehyung, I think it’s probably because our personalities are pretty opposite (again, HUGE grain of salt, since I don’t *actually* know any of them in real life, so I’m just going off the little info we have), so it takes me a little longer to write his stuff. For Hoseok, I think it’s because there is so much more to him than meets the eye and his personality is difficult for me to pin down sometimes.

Again, thanks so much for your sweet words and thought-provoking requestion (it’s a word now)! I hope you find my take interesting! 💕💜

Seokjin:

Conscientious - I think Kim Seokjin is very, VERY aware of his role in any given setting. He knows what’s expected of him and how to do it without bending any of his personal boundaries/rules.

Private - I firmly believe that we will never know the true personality of our Mr. Worldwide Handsome. I think he decided early on that to survive in this life, he was going to have to separate his stage persona from his personal life---and he guards this separation fiercely. This is also one of the qualities I admire the most about him: his unwavering commitment to keeping pieces of himself just for him. My personal opinion is that he is the member that gave up the most of a “normal” life and, while he did so knowing the consequences of this choice, he’s found ways to “rebel” and keep his own autonomy (think: responding to fans in a very “blunt” manner [Marry me? No.], cutting/coloring his hair against company wishes, refusing to give-in to fan-service he is uncomfortable with [thinking specifically of that one time the host tried to get him to kiss Taehyung and he just started yelling over them when they tried to insist], his penchant for avoiding overly ~revealing~ outfits, etc etc).

Professional - I mean, just a continuation of both of the points above. He always knows when the cameras are watching and how he should act accordingly. But---and this is important---I am in NO WAY saying he’s being fake or disingenuous. The Jin we see on stage, in MVs, RunBTS, and even Bon Voyage/In The Soop is the real Jin---it’s just not all of him. He chose the Idol Life as his career, as a profession, so he would never be caught violating the terms that he himself has set to fulfill his responsibilities. What little we know of his family leads me to believe that he was groomed from a young age how to navigate high society and the professional world; now it’s just a slightly different world and society he floats through.

Responsible - He takes the job of eldest brother very seriously. Though the baby in much of his younger life, as soon as he got 6 little brothers he stepped effortlessly into his new role. Making them food, driving them to school, helping them feel at home in a new place, providing silent but tangible support... My personal favorite is the way he willingly makes a fool of himself to relax the others, to help them calm down during stressful situations and break the ice.

Good memory - I want to be careful how I explain this, because I don’t want it to come out wrong. I think Kim Seokjin has a very good memory. If you were decent to him and his brothers during the hard times, he’ll remember that going forward. If you were cruel to or dismissive of him as a young exchange student abroad, he’ll never forget. However, I also think he’s cunning enough that you would never be able to tell which category you fall under unless he wants you to know.

Hard-worker - I mean, just the endless amounts of anecdotes we have about him practicing his vocals and choreography all night long should be enough evidence for this point, but I still sometimes feel like he doesn’t get enough credit. We all know the story of how he got placed in BTS, but I don’t think people appreciate how damn hard he has worked to grow into this life. He was a college student, set on a completely different life with completely different expectations, scooped off the street and told to learn to sing and dance and look. at. him. now. Listen to that vocal range, look at the Black Swan choreography or the way he seamlessly joined the dance break of ON---he has worked HARD and I don’t think we should forget about this. Just because something doesn’t come easy to you, if you’re not naturally gifted, it doesn’t mean you can’t work to achieve it.

Basically I just love Kim Seokjin with my whole heart.

Yoongi:

Empathetic - This word is the beginning and end of how I would describe his entire being. I think Min Yoongi is a very empathetic person. He sits back and observes, and he’s aware of everything. You know when you first get into BTS, there’s always the stories of him being the “scariest” member or the “toughest” or the quietest (especially in the earlier days of BTS, because can we just talk about how much happier he has been this last year-year.5?? How much more himself he is at all times? How much more comfortable??? We love to see it.) But I think his quiet watchfulness just gets frequently mistaken for scary or tough. In addition, his empathy allows him to connect with others in a special way, to acknowledge them and build them up (thinking of that one V-Live or whatever where Jungkook says something kind of under his breath---something about a past life?---and Yoongi not only hears him but turns to him and explicitly validates his feelings and thoughts, OR the times when he tells Jimin that he really likes his singing voice).

Protective - He doesn’t like unkindness in any way, shape, or form. He doesn’t tolerate cruelty or bullying. And let’s not forget: he sees everything. Every slight, every intentional dismissal, every dig or jab, every “diss track” lyrics. Every single injustice. Now, he can stand up for himself (when he deems it appropriate, because I also think he’s pretty good at picking battles), but his true force comes out when those he loves are belittled/threatened/disrespected. He is fiercely protective of those he loves.

Emotionally Intelligent - Obviously, I think he’s also just intelligent-intelligent, but I want to focus on this aspect for a moment, because I think this is a quality that gets overlooked in people in general. He is aware of the importance of emotions, both his own and other people’s. It’s in the way he recognized that he and Taehyung were polar opposites and made a concentrated effort to understand him better. It’s in the way he unabashedly announces that they hold hands when they’re arguing. It’s in the way that he insists that there is more to life than school, grades, others’ expectations. It’s also in the way he knows exactly how to make the others laugh, the way one of his sharp-witted comments or physical-comedy bits can break a tension or diffuse the moment. It’s all over every single one of his songs. It’s in the way he calmly handles challenges and has a unique relationship with each of his brothers according to their needs. He treats his relationships---with the members, the fans, staff, friends, family, whoever---with care and respect and maturity.

Compassionate (read also: Cinnamon Roll) - Yoongi understands darkness because he has experienced it himself, and he will do whatever he can to make sure no on else suffers in the same way. He takes care of the people in his life, usually by doing little things or quiet things (think: the reason they call him the “dad” of BTS). He’s not afraid to correct people when they’re wrong, but he always manages to do it kindly. He’s also a complete pushover for the ones he loves: think of how he each member of the maknae line has a different but special relationship with him, think of how Jungkook can basically crawl all over him and hit him and annoy him and bother him and he never bats an eye, think of the way he showed up with chicken because he didn’t want Hoseok to be alone, think of the way he goes fishing with Jin because he knows his big bro loves it so much, think of the way he never ever yells at anyone when he’s angry, think of the way he softens his tone when explaining things. Cinnamon. Roll.

Straight-forward - He’s blessed with the ability to be blunt but not cruel. I actually personally really hate the word “blunt” because, in my experience, it usually comes into play when someone is explaining that their rude, offensive, and ignorant comment *isn’t* rude, offensive, or ignorant---they’re “just a blunt person.” But I think Yoongi is someone who is actually able to be straight-forward (a much better term than the dreaded b-word) without slipping into carelessness. He says things how they are, but, using his emotional awareness and intelligence, he’s able to say it calmly and kindly. If you’ve messed up, he’s going to tell you you messed up---but he’s also going to help you figure out the next steps and volunteer to walk with you while you take them. He’s going to call out bad behavior---but always remind you that he loves you no matter what. He’s going to critique the song you wrote---but it’s going to be 90% positive comments and 10% suggestions of what could be better/smoother/more understandable. I also feel like he is someone who expects the same in return: he hates liars and has a low tolerance for bullshit.

Basically I just love Min Yoongi with my whole heart.

Hoseok:

Duality - Now, I don’t mean duality in the way you can compare his precious ray-of-sunshine moments to the times he absolutely blows everyone away on stage (though this is obviously a thing). I’m referring more to the way he can be both ray of sunshine and serious-business all at the same time. Like Jin, I think Hoseok chose an Idol persona (though I think his decision was prompted more by a desire to be uplifting and cheerful and our hope) and exists comfortably within those parameters. However, unlike Jin, I think Hoseok doesn’t mind if people see the other side sometimes, too. He’s not afraid to set down the bubbly-Hobi persona, even if cameras are rolling. He’s not afraid to be emotional, whether that’s over-the-top happiness, or genuine overwhelmed tears. He can wear a flower around his face and make cute noises and then the next second he can snap at the maknae to not fool around near a pool so he doesn’t get his clothes all wet. It’s not an act either way, he’s just both.

Good judgment - Obviously, we know that Jung Hoseok is a hard-worker. We know he’s dedicated his life to his craft, first with dancing and then with rapping. He can be an intimidating dance captain, someone who takes it seriously and pushes everyone to be the very best they can be. His work ethic is insane, and he never accepts less than his best---but, in comparison to others on this list, I think he is able to critique himself fairly and kindly. While he demands perfection, he doesn’t tear himself apart to find it. I think he has the ability to assess something or someone and come away with a fairly unbiased opinion.

Comfortable - This is hard to describe in just a word, but I think he has a way of making people feel at ease in his presence. Even as one of the biggest superstars on the planet right now, you get the sense that he never wants to make people feel uncomfortable or intimidated or uneasy. Something about his mannerisms, his bright smile, his personableness, make him seem approachable. I think it’s also why Namjoon’s been known to say that BTS couldn’t exist without Hoseok, why Yoongi values his friendship so much, why Jungkook is constantly snuggling him. My personal opinion is that he was instrumental in bridging the gap that sometimes might have occurred between Namjoon and Yoongi in the early days; his comfortable presence eased some of the tension that (I’m guessing) may have naturally arisen between two of the greatest young rappers in the game when they were first working together. Hoseok just wants everyone to feel comfortable and at ease around him.

Kind - I think Jung Hoseok is just a genuinely kind human being. I think he is trusting and loyal, but also just the sort of person who will make it his mission to make you smile on a bad day. Just the fact that he chose to make his stage persona someone who is full of hope and happiness speaks volumes. Knowing his own personal struggles, he extrapolates this knowledge to guess how others could feel, and throws himself into the role of positive, happy, sunshiney, hope. It’s his kindness that motivates this behavior.

High standards - This goes along with his good judgment, but I think Hoseok expects a certain level of competence from everyone around him, in whatever capacity they’re working. Again, this goes along with his desire to have the entire group work on a bit of choreo until it’s right. I think that, because he pushes himself to be the best and fulfill expectations, he looks for this same dedication in others (what comes to mind is that moment in some interview where Namjoon is struggling a little [cos English is the WORST, ugh] so Hoseok looks over at the interpreter like “what exactly are you doing, do your job, help him translate”).

Basically I just love Jung Hoseok with my whole heart.

Namjoon:

Unbelievably intelligent - I know this one isn’t exactly shocking, but I still feel like it needs to be mentioned first and appreciated more. Namjoon is crazy intelligent, academically speaking. He thrives on the pursuit of knowledge, on contemplating and discussing higher concepts, on learning new things that feed his curiosity and his soul. While I also think this crazy-high intellect can sometimes hinder his ability to connect emotionally with people, it’s also this exact quality that makes him so well suited for the role he has been thrust into---not just in the group, but in the world.

Nerdy - Bicycling, bonsai trees, reading, tiny creatures, art exhibits. He is unabashedly and desperately passionate about the things he likes. He isn’t afraid to love something just because he loves it. He goes all-in on things that he’s interested in, whether they’re “cool” or not. His curiosity pushes him forward, needling him to learn everything he can about things he’s passionate about. He sinks himself into these hobbies wholly (think: carrying a book or two with him everywhere so he can get some reading in, visiting as many art museums and exhibits as possible on days off, making cutesy noises at stingrays and scooping teeny-tiny crabs out of the sand to tell them how beautiful they are).

Macro-focused - He strikes me very much as the sort of person who loves to talk about concepts and ideas and philosophies in great terms. He loves clever wordplay, he likes to reflect on his place in the universe, he wants to discuss the complexities of life and human nature. His quick-mind devours these topics, and I can imagine he could sit for hours with you debating philosophy and discussing art. On the flip side, though, I think he isn’t so good with minutiae---and by “minutiae” I mean everything from being more aware of his physical surroundings to dealing with personal things. For example, I think he’s brilliant when he discusses happiness and hardship and joy and pain and love and humanity in the songs he writes...... but he’s not exactly the first person you would go to if you were having a tough or emotional personal time. Don’t get me wrong: obviously he cares about the people in his life, he cares about people in general---but sometimes all you need is a hug and pat on the back to encourage you and Namjoon would instead launch into the greater implications and consequences of human nature in an attempt to help you feel better.

Logical - I know this seems like a given, but while I think others on this list are more emotionally-intelligent, I think logic is one of Namjoon’s greatest strengths. For example: if another member is crying or upset, Jimin would notice they’re upset and immediately go and hug them and wipe their tears away; Namjoon would notice they’re upset and immediately look for the source of the problem. Once identified, he’d take the next steps to rectifying the problem, because logic dictates that if the problem gets solved, then the other member would be happier. If there was nothing to rectify, he’d attempt to comfort them with cold, hard facts. (I’m thinking about that time when Jungkook got upset because he felt like he messed up his performances, and Jimin immediately hugs him and comforts him and tells him he was great, while Namjoon assesses the situation and starts talking about how he himself actually, objectively messed up, so there’s no logical reason for Jungkook to be upset right now.) He dreams and enjoys literature and the arts---but when it comes to handling practical, inter-personal issues, he’s much more comfortable with logic.

Vibes - I really didn’t have a good word to describe this thought of mine, so let me just get right into explaining: I think Namjoon is, generally speaking, one of the smartest people---if not the smartest person---in the room. He’s aware of this fact without being arrogant about it, but it is the truth. Because of this, I think he’s frequently called on to explain things, to expound on them, to teach or interpret or decipher. I think he enjoys this role, because he loves talking about things he’s passionate about (see above: nerdy) but sometimes...sometimes I think he just desperately wants someone he can vibe with. Someone who can match his level intellectually. Someone whom he doesn’t have to teach. I think he is over-the-moon ecstatic when he meets someone he can vibe with in any way---whether that’s intelligence-related or passion/hobby-related. I don’t know, I just sometimes feel like he chooses to spend his personal time with people who can match him in some way, whom he can vibe with.

Basically I just love Kim Namjoon with my whole heart.

Jimin:

Caring - For me, Park Jimin starts and ends with this characteristic. He cares. A lot. About a lot of things. He cares about his brothers, he cares about his family, he cares about his friends, he cares about ARMY, he cares about music, he cares about his dancing, he cares about fashion, he cares about how he’s perceived, he cares about doing his very best, he cares about the future generations, he cares about those who are less fortunate than him, he just cares so much. Along with Yoongi, I think he is incredibly empathetic. How many times do we see him basically sprint across a room or a sandy beach or a campsite or a stage to get to an upset member? He reads people’s emotions and has a natural instinct to take care of them. Like anything, though, I think his biggest strength can also be a great weakness: sometimes he cares too much. How many times has he worked until his body is covered with pain patches, until his feet bled, until he almost passed out? All the weight he lost, because he cared about his appearance? How hard he worked at being “hardcore, manly” Jimin, because that’s what he thought people cared about most? All the times he cried after a tiny mistake, because he cared about being perfect, because he cared about others’ perception of him? Park Jimin cares so/too much and it’s one of the most defining things about his personality.

Social Intelligence/눈치 - One thing I love the most is how he has such a unique relationship with each one of his brothers. Now, obviously, every single combo in Bangtan is different and unique and special. But I love watching Jimin’s relationships with the others so much, because he’s so aware of what they need. Truthfully, I think Jimin is hyper aware of others in general. If you’re trying to sneaky-cry at a crowded party, Jimin is the type of person who would somehow appear at your side, ready to help you feel better. His empathy and sensitivity allow him to assess what each individual needs the most from him and act accordingly. He knows Taehyung should never be left alone when upset, knows that if Jungkook is actually crying then something is very wrong, knows that Leader RM sometimes needs to just be his one-year-older hyung Namjoon, knows exactly how far he can push Yoongi’s buttons, knows to laugh at Jin’s dad-jokes (especially when they’re for the benefit of the group), and knows that Hoseok needs to be reminded how much cohesiveness he provides the group in general.

Self-Critical - All right, I feel like this one might be a little controversial, so hear me out. Like I mentioned earlier, he cares a lot, and part of that translates into caring about himself---caring about his achievements, his performance, his appearance. It’s partly the classical dancer in him and partly just his personality. He wants to do and be his best always. But.... I do think that he has learned to be much kinder to himself over the years. Gone are the days of starving himself to get rid of his cheeks, the tearful breakdowns after a single missed step in a performance, the acting outside of his true personality because he thinks that’s what he’s supposed to be. I think we now very much see a Jimin who has come into his own, who has accepted himself for who he is (including his flaws), who has embraced every part of him. This doesn’t mean that I think he never has to fight the nagging voice in his head, or struggle with insecurities, or swallow down the urge to berate himself after a less-than-perfect performance---he still expects the best out of himself, still wants to be the best. I just think he’s found a way to critique himself without absolutely tearing himself apart.

Cunning - Yet another word that looks and sounds derogatory, but isn’t really in this context. Like a lot of other empathetic, sensitive, socially-intelligent people, knowing exactly what people need and are feeling also allows him to know weaknesses. Weaknesses he would never exploit---unless he wanted to. I actually don’t think we see much of him using others’ weaknesses against them, but in my opinion, this quality is linked to two of his other quirks: 1) his talent and complete lack of guilt for cheating at games and 2) his penchant for pettiness. I don’t really know how to explain my thought-process here---not well, anyway. But I feel like Jimin is so tuned into the important things (so concerned about the important things) that little things, like cheating at a game, don’t matter to him much. And, if he can use his usually sweet and helpful and hard-working, honest self to get away with it, even better. On the flip side, I don’t think he enjoys or endures confrontation as much or as well as, say, Yoongi might---so he expresses himself in a quieter, underhanded way. (The moment that’s coming to mind is that one time they were at an American event and he commented, in Korean, about how unorganized things seem to be.) Jimin is the sweetest, most sensitive, empathetic little cinnamon roll---until it’s time to win a game, or until he’s feeling a little prickly and petty.

Basically I just love Park Jimin with my whole heart.

Taehyung:

Individualistic - Kim Taehyung knows who he is. He knows what he likes, what he wants, what he thinks. He is going to wear whatever he wants, paint whatever he wants, say whatever he wants, and do whatever he wants. He’s a person who seems to have figured out a long time ago what makes him happy and how to be his true self around others no matter what---and this something I greatly envy. If he wants to learn the violin, he’s gonna buy a violin and play some scratchy Twinkle Twinkle Little Star on a hotel balcony---because that’s what he wants to do. If he wants to write a song, it’s going to be in his style, the way he likes it. If he wants a really cool, avant-garde piece of artsy clothing, he’s going to spray-paint it himself. If he has an opinion on something, it’s highly likely that he’s spent quite a bit of time forming this opinion---but once that’s his opinion, that’s his opinion. That’s what he thinks, there’s no need to listen to others or change. I think this quality, this ability to be himself so freely and earnestly, is both one of the reasons he’s able to make friends so easily and be beloved so quickly (see: “Bangtan’s True Baby” and “Wooga Squad darling”); and one of the reasons others (including the other members, by their own admission) can’t understand him well at first. I think it has brought many good things to his life, but has also played a significant part in some of the struggles that he has had. He’s precious, but also very easily misunderstood.

Not Very Outward-Sensing - Notice I very purposefully don’t go anywhere near the words “self-absorbed” or “self-centered”---because he’s not. On the contrary, I think Taehyung feels very deeply for the people in his life (see below: Emotional), but his ability to care for them is sometimes inhibited by his lack of outward-sensing. If Jimin is the king of 눈치/social awareness, then Taehyung is the absolute opposite (which is why it is unendingly intriguing to me that two of his closest relationships in BTS---he and Jimin, he and Yoongi---are comprised of one person who lacks this awareness [Tae] and one person who has all the awareness [Jimin, Yoongi]). He would never hurt someone’s feelings on purpose, but quite often he’s just not paying a whole lot of attention to what other people might be feeling or experiencing. He’s not concerned about walking on eggshells, because he feels that as long as his intentions are good, nobody can be too hurt or too uncomfortable with him or his behavior (A great example of this is the infamous Spring Day Dance Debate from “Burn the Stage.” In Taehyung’s mind, he saw something that should be changed and needed to be addressed, so he called it out. It never in a million years would occur to him that the way he phrased it or the way he kept harping on it could be a source of irritation or discomfort to Jin. To him, it was a very black-and-white, clear-cut situation: something was wrong, he had an idea of how it should be fixed, therefore nothing bad could/should come of him speaking his mind in the pursuit of this perfect solution he created). He seems like the sort of person who, after accidentally hurting your feelings, would sympathize with your hurt and want to make it better, but focus more on the fact that he didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, so it’s not really his fault.

Emotional - I think he is very in-touch with his emotions, which can be both a good thing and a bad thing. For example, if he’s upset, he wants everyone to know and acknowledge that he’s upset. He doesn’t like feeling ignored or passed over, and where others might let it slide, he’s not afraid to speak up about it (I’m thinking about the time there was a question directed specifically to Yoongi about being from Daegu and Taehyung immediately pointed out that he was also from Daegu, and kind of pouted a little until it was acknowledged). Also, although it’s never been said explicitly, I think he is one of the members who potentially struggles with depression. He can take things very personally and to heart. But this is likely because he has such a big heart. He loves unabashedly and he’s very vocal about who he loves---think of all the times he’s said and posted comments along the lines of “Please love all seven” and “Please love each of us equally.” He also can be very protective (thinking of that one Weverse post where he lowkey chewed somebody out for posting an unflattering photo of one of the others) and blunt when defending those he loves. I mean, he created a whole new word just to express how much he loves ARMY! When he’s sad, he cries. When he’s happy, he giggles. When he’s angry, he expresses it. When he’s disappointed, he doesn’t hide it. To me, he is a near-perfect example of someone who wears their heart on their sleeves.

Contradictory - One of his most endearing qualities. He is not very outward-focused---but he bought a pair of gloves because he remembered that Jimin offhandedly mentioned that he needed some. He doesn’t read other people easily---but he (so far) is also pretty darn good at completing accurate Vibe-Checks for those who come in contact with BTS. He doesn’t always see as much as the others might---but he also notices certain things they might miss. The beauty of his being is that he can be both things at the same time and not seem out of place.

Basically I just love Kim Taehyung with my whole heart.

Jungkook:

Confident Yet Perfectionistic - Now listen: when I say confident, I don’t mean that he never struggles with insecurities. I mean confident in the way that his whole life (at least his whole Idol life) he had 6 older brothers who encouraged him to try and do anything he wanted---and then supported him no matter the outcome. Being raised in an environment like that, where you’re encouraged to try things, where you have people who love you constantly praising your efforts and providing a safe space for you to fail, you gain a certain amount of confidence in your abilities, in yourself. I think this is actually a big part of the Golden Maknae moniker: yes, I think he is the type of person to whom things may come quite easily and who is naturally skilled in several areas---but it’s also a little easier to conquer new things when you have years of encouraged-successes under your belt. He has gained a confidence in himself over years of trying and working his tail off and eventually succeeding; he knows he can do anything if he works at it enough because he’s always been able to do everything he works at. Where the perfectionistic aspect kicks in especially is this: there are a lot of people who have a natural affinity for lots of things. There are lots of people who can pick up something new and be decent right away (I honestly think Taehyung is another person like this, someone who can pick new things up pretty easily)---the difference is that Jeon Jungkook is the type of person who takes that natural affinity and runs with it. He’s not satisfied with just being good at something; if it’s something he really wants to do, he throws his whole heart and soul and self into it. In my opinion, this sets him apart from people who could be considered “Jack of All Trades, Master of None.” He trusts his process and uses it to be the very best he can be in whatever he does.

Introverted - Obviously he’s not the only introverted member of Bangtan, but I do think that his specific life experiences require a little more discussion on this topic than the others. By his own admission, his childhood ended really early. He didn’t focus much on school because he was focused on his career; he never got to have the typical high school experiences most of the others had. At an incredibly young age he was thrust into a totally different life that required being in the spotlight---and while this definitely brought unique challenges, he loves his life as a musician and performer. I think out of all BTS, Jungkook especially lives for performing. He lights up on stage and is at his absolute happiest when performing (and performing well). And yet none of this changes the fact that he is absolutely an introvert, someone who needs to recharge with just a little alone time. Alone time. Not easy to achieve when you live in the same tiny dorm with 6 other boys. Not easy to achieve when you are constantly surrounded by brothers, staff, instructors, producers, cameras, and fans.

Maknae - I can’t explain this well, I know I can’t, but it just is such a huge part of him that I feel like I need to try. In so many ways, Jungkook is a typical baby of the family. It’s evident in the way that he unabashedly idolizes his Rap-Mon-hyung. In the way he constantly cuddles and sniffs and snuggles Hoseok. In the way he’s not afraid to pester Yoongi or tease Seokjin. He also seems like someone who is much more of a fixer than a listener; meaning, if you go to him with a problem, he’s going to be focused on how he can fix the situation, not on just listening and sympathizing/empathizing with you, a trait that I feel comes easily to babies of families (not that *all* youngest children have this, mind you) because they’re typically not the ones confided in, so if something is brought to them they want to help make it right (massive generalization, I know, don’t kill me). As discussed above, he’s also confident in himself because he’s been raised with older siblings who have always told him “yes, you can.” He’s just Baby in all the ways that stick with a person even as they grow older.

Trusting - Jungkook strikes me as the sort of person who trusts fairly easily---and, more importantly, unshakably. He has no problem admitting to millions of ARMY that he ripped his pants on stage or V-Living while drunk (I don’t care what he says, babyboy was at least a little buzzed) because he trusts us. He could easily follow Namjoon (or any of his brothers) to the ends of the earth. He takes every opportunity to speak earnestly and wholeheartedly about how much he genuinely loves ARMY, because he trusts that that love will be returned.

Basically I just love Jeon Jungkook with my whole heart.

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ak8shi · 4 years

Text

Kuroo + Iwaizumi: HQ boys as workout instructors series

Suga + Bokuto ver.

warnings: light swearing!!

Kuroo Tetsurou

Your friend somehow convinces you to go to a kickboxing class, bribing you with ice cream afterwards

You: …what do you mean I have to leave my bed

Honestly you’re scared because you’re out of shape and definitely nothing close to a regular at the gym

You arrive at the gym with your friend, and you enter the kickboxing room

There’s around 15 people in the class, but the instructor hasn’t arrive yet

You stretch with your friend, mentally preparing yourself to absolutely die LMAO

Around five minutes before the class begins, this tall guy walks in with a duffel bag

To put it simply, HE WAS BEAUTIFUL,, and you definitely weren’t the only one looking

As he puts his things down in the corner, you can see his back muscles flexing under his tight black shirt he just hits so different in all black I’m about to bark

He takes out his boxing tape, wrapping his hands in it, and then he introduces himself,,,

“Hi everyone, welcome to beginning kickboxing! My name is Kuroo, and I’m going to be helping everyone with drills throughout the class. Let me know if you need anything before we begin.”

Let’s be honest, Kuroo’s workout playlist BANGS,, he’s a big fan of Roddy Ricch, J.Cole, Nicki, Kendrick, Meg, and Travis

You, praying: can I not embarrass myself in front of this man thanks !

He puts the music on, instructing everyone through a warm-up from the front of the studio

Kuroo is such a great teacher, and he somehow makes it so fun and engaging, king shit!!

Ugh he has such great energy and gets everyone encouraged and pumped up, he’s also SO smiley and approachable

After the warm up, everyone slips on their gloves with ease, ofc,,, except for you

Dear god he’s about to start and you’re not ready

Your friend isn’t helping you, she wants you to ask for help LMAOOO

You finally suck it up and raise your hand, and he walks over to you

Kuroo: hey can I help you out with that?

You: WHY IS HE SO HOT?? AND RESPECTFUL????

He carefully helps you get the gloves onto your hands, making sure you’re comfy before jogging back up to the front of the classroom you blacked out for a few minutes

He takes everyone through the movements, starting basic with how to hit the bag, posture, and form

Kuroo eventually gives everyone drills to do, and he walks around the room to see if anyone needs assistance

You’re trying your best and really getting into it, until he walks around and gives you a cute smile and a thumbs up please how am I supposed to focus on not dying when you’re like this sir

Your friend is nudging you,,,

“dude he’s totally into you, I’ve taken classes with him before and he doesn’t do that to just anyone”

Your stomach is erupting in butterflies at her words or maybe you’re trying not to yak, but you’re trying not to get your hopes up

The class is coming to an end, and it somehow went by so fast?? Maybe because you spent half of it staring at Kuroo’s arms as he hits the punching bag

You are super sweaty but the workout was refreshing and you definitely want to try kickboxing again ,,, especially if Kuroo is the instructor

He gets the attention of the class after going through a cool-down routine

“Thank you so much for being amazing everyone! I hope to see some of you in my intermediate level classes, or just around the gym in general, don’t be a stranger!”

You start to pack up your things, everyone else besides your friend and Kuroo having left the room

Your friend suddenly: bye! It was so nice meeting you today sis! Text me when you get home!

SHE LEFT YOU I-

You’re confused for a second since she literally drove you to the gym, but before you can say anything someone is tapping your shoulder

You turn around,,,shaking in your boots,,,, Kuroo is standing there with his bag slung around his shoulder, wiping his face with a towel

He looks so good sweaty please

Him: hey, was this your first session? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in any of my classes… I definitely would’ve remembered you ;) we all know he practiced this in his head for the entirety of the class because he’s a DORK in actuality

Bro all you can do is squeak out a “yes”

He asks for your number, and offers to train you personally at the gym,, HOT

You walk out of the building a blushing mess, and then you see your friend sitting outside in her car LMAO

Her, as you get in the passenger seat: so,, did you secure the bag

You: WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME

Her: I did what I had to do get you a friend

Iwaizumi Hajime

So you’re a regular at the gym, but you haven’t really tried any of the classes offered through your membership

You sign up for a spin class that takes place every Wednesday morning, thinking it would be nice to get a workout in before work

It was not

You had to wake up at 5 am to eat something and get dressed for the class, and you find yourself dragging yourself into the locker rooms to put your things away

With sleep still evident in your features, you go to sit at one of the spin machines, resting your head on the handle waiting for impending doom

A guy walks in rocking an all-white and grey fit and puts his things down next to you, but you don’t really pay attention to him or make an effort to look at him properly

Everyone slowly trickles into the spin room, chatting amongst themselves and you’re not really sure how anyone is functioning this early

Then,, the dude next to you stands up and turns around, speaking into his head set

“Good morning everyone, welcome to intermediate spin, my name is Iwaizumi and I will be your instructor! Please be ready to go in five minutes,”

You didn’t even realize you sat next to the instructor seat lmao, and you’re stunned by how nice the man’s voice is!!! Not only did he have a nice voice, but you also overlooked him as an instructor because he was so young looking

So once everyone is ready to go, he hops onto the bike next to you

His playlist consists of Bad Bunny, electronic, and a lot of RnB the taste jumped out

As you start the machine and it shows the route that the bike is supposed to take, Iwa starts talking about the goal of the workout and the motivation its going to take to finish

We love a professional !!!

The class is hard; mostly because it’s your first time but you make it through thanks to Iwaizumi’s skilled teaching style, and the way he doesn’t leave anyone behind even if they are struggling

It also helped that he was next to you most of the session you could see every droplet of sweat on his beautiful face and tanned arms

You feel great after every session, feeling like you’re accomplishing something, and you get to see your little crush every Wednesday

It definitely makes it easier to get out of bed in the morning

You make small talk with Iwa since he’s right next to you, and slowly it progresses into a really nice friendship

You help him set-up and clean-up the room before and after class, and he brings you coffee in return (he knows your order by heart🥰)

Him: good morning

You: fuck off loser👹

Him: I brought you coffee

You: ☺️hey Iwa

He’s honestly so great at his job, and he tells you that he got into cycling because of the side-training he did for volleyball

One session near the end of the cycling classes, you were having a rough time and in a bad mood because of work, and Iwa lowkey helped you work through it within that one workout session and you felt so much better by the end of it how does he do it

You, dying: Iwa I can’t go on

Him: You fucking panini head who said you were allowed to stop

The forty year old soccer mom on the other side of him: Iwa I can’t go on

Him: You’re doing amazing sweetie! Don’t hurt yourself, you got this!😘

…t-that’s when you realize you have feelings for him, but you’re not really sure how to go about telling him

You stress over it for the next week, and in no time you find yourself walking into your last class with Iwa as your instructor sad girl hours

You had bought him a sweatband as a joke and embroidered his initials on it, and you were planning on giving it to him at the end of class

He greets you the same as usual, and then turns and thanks everyone for sticking with the class

The session is amazing of course, but you’re feeling such a mix of emotions as the seconds on your machine dwindle down to 0:00

A few people come up to Iwa to thank him, and you purposely pack up your things and stretch super slowly

Finally, you are the only two people left in the room

He finishes cleaning off the seats, and then he turns to you as you’re turning the machines off,

His steel eyes are boring into you, and he’s cracking his knuckles nervously

“h-hey, would you maybe want to go out with me sometime?”

NOT WHAT YOU WERE EXPECTING-

You blush,, but in the best way possible;

You reach over to pinch his rosy cheek, obviously saying yes

You reach into your bag and throw the sweatband at him

He catches it, laughing as he admires the stitchwork on it

Him, knowing you embroidered it yourself: omg aw did Helen Keller stitch this?😍

You: for personal reasons I will be revoking my agreement to go on any kind of date with you

Before you leave the gym with your fresh coffee, you give him a kiss on the cheek and he literally can not stop thinking about how crazy he is about you !!

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lovelyghostlyharmony · 3 years

Text

Malibu Rescue- Their little sister self-harms

Warning- self-harm

Eric- When you told Eric you had something to tell him with a serious look on your face he was immediately concerned. He sat down on the couch with you and waited patiently for you to open up to him.

"Eric lately I've been feeling really sad and lonely. And I just feel like such a failure, so I-" You were struggling to get the words out so you hold your arm out to him and he sees the marks on your arm.

"Y/n what...? Did you do this to yourself?" You squeeze your eyes shut and nod your head. You feel yourself being held in your older brother's arms. He always made you feel safe and protected and this time was no different.

"I'm sorry Eric you must be so disappointed in me."

"No sunshine, absolutely not. I am so proud of you for being brave enough to tell me about this. Asking for help takes a lot of courage and I am glad you came to me. Do you want to talk to someone? Like a professional?"

"I think I should so it doesn't end up getting worse.."

"Do you want me to call someone so?"

"Sure... will you go with me?"

"Of course sunshine. Your big bro is always here for you, you know that don't you?"

Gina- When you opened up to Gina and told her that you had been self-harming you weren't expecting your normally strong and stubborn older sister to start crying in front of you. You knew she had his own experiences with depression and you figured she was the one person you could open up to.

"Sorry for crying. You're my little sister and I care so much about you. I feel like I have failed as your older sister and can't keep you safe.." You hug her to help comfort her as well as yourself.

"It's not you Gina please don't blame yourself."

"Do you want to talk to someone? Like a professional?''

"I don't know if I am ready for that step yet. I just feel comfortable talking to you for now."

"Then that's what we'll do. Anytime you feel like harming yourself. I don't care if it's in the middle of something, you call me or one of my friends and they will get me, okay? I'm always going to be here for you and I don't want you to do something you're going to regret later... okay?"

Tyler- Tyler had seen the scars on your arm when you wore a t-shirt. He had knocked on your door and you told him to come into the room without thinking. His eyes immediately went to your arm as you had a few fresh cuts there.

"Y/n? Did you do that to yourself?" You see tears well up in his eyes instantly and you panic, running to the closet to grab a hoodie to throw on over your shirt. Tyler lightly places his hand on your shoulder and you feel tears forming behind your own eyes. When you turn around and see the look of concern in his you can't stop them from falling. Tyler doesn't say anything, just tugs you into his arms into a bone-crushing hug.

"Please y/n don't do this to yourself. If you ever feel like hurting yourself come to me, or your friends, or just anybody. You know there are so many people who are here for you and love you and don't want anything to happen to you."

"I'm sorry Tyler..."

"Shh don't apologize to me. I'm going to help you through this okay? It's my duty as your big brother to keep you safe. Even if it's from yourself."

Dylan- "Dylan what are you doing?" You see your older sister coming at you with a marker in her hand. She goes to grab at your arm and uncover your long sleeve and you immediately pull it into yourself.

"Y/n... I know okay? Just.. please let me see your arm." You shrink back but place your arm out.

"Turn your head away." You do as your sister tells you and turn your head to the side. You can feel him drawing on your arm and your curiosity gets the better of you. You turn your head to the side and are immediately scolded by her.

"No peeking until I am done!" You crack a smile and turn your head back. A few moments later and Dylan tells you it's okay to look. You look down and see your arm covered in hearts. Immediately you feel tears well up in your eyes and spill over your cheeks.

"Dyl?"

"So the next time you feel the urge to self-harm, you'll see all those hearts on your arm and know that you have an older sister who loves you and cares about you so much and doesn't want you to hurt yourself anymore.." You burst into tears and throw yourself into her arms.

"Thank you, Dylan"

"Of course. You know you can always open up to me and tell me what's going on. I will be here for you, you can always count on that."

Lizzie- Lizzie was shocked when you told her you had been self-harming. You had when you were younger but as far as she knew you had stopped for the past year.

"I'm sorry Lizzie I know I probably disappointed you so much. I was doing really well but, some people are school were bullying me and it just got to be too much.."

"Oh, y/n, I am not disappointed in you at all. I'm glad you told me. Now let me help you okay?"

"How are you going to do that?" You see Lizzie reach for a baseball bat and you tilt your head at her.

"Now give me the names and addresses of these people who are bullying my precious younger sister." You burst out laughing and scold her."Lizzie no! you can't go beating up random teenagers." She sighs and sets the bat back down.

"Thank you though Lizzie. It means a lot to me to know my big sister always has my back."

"Next time... before you do that will you talk to me, please? I know I am not around as much anymore but.. I'll always make time for you."

"I know. And I will next time. I promise..."

Brody- You were wrestling around with Brody. He had been picking on you all day and teasing you and you had enough. While you two were messing with each other your sleeve rolled up and he looked and saw the scars on your arm.

"Y/n? What are those?"

"Um... Nothing Brody just forget about it please?"

"I am absolutely not going to forget about it, what is going on? Are you hurting yourself?" You tug your sleeve back down and hug your knees to your chest.

"Yes... I only did it once though Brody I just got really sad and overwhelmed and... I don't know it just happened."

"You aren't doing it anymore though?" You shake your head.

"But you still get urges to, don't you?" You hug your knees tighter and nod your head. Instantly he wraps you in a tight hug. "Y/n please next time you feel like this tell me. You're my little sister and I love you and I never want anything bad to happen to you. Okay? Your big brother is always going to be here for you."

#malibu rescue #self harm #little sister reader #angstwithhappyending #team Flounder x reader #malibu rescue x reader #gina x reader #dylan x reader #eric x reader #tyler x reader #Lizzie x reader #Brody x reader

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calypsoff2 · 3 years

Text

One.

Licking my top lip as I walked into Tianna classroom “We have Tianna’ dad here, shall we all go outside and celebrate Tianna’ birthday” my daughter’ teacher said, Tianna pulled a face at me looking down, she didn’t want drama, so she says but it’s my daughter birthday, I’m gonna do a little something for her “yes!! Do we get cake!?” A kid in the classroom shouted, nodding my head “there is cake and food, the whole nine for her class. Tianna is paying you see” I joked, Tianna ain’t getting up from her seat to see me with her moody ass “if we all want to form a line so we can go outside and can we all thank Tianna’ dad too for doing this” making my way over to Tianna, she is either happy or moody, she is smiling either way “Thank you Tianna’ dad” the class said, crouching down to her “you not getting up from your seat, I got cake. Uncle TJ is here too, I got him to dress up as a Bratz doll” Tianna laughed “liar, that means he dresses like a girl” nodding my head “that’s because he does, I don’t get why you don’t want a party? What is wrong?” My daughters keep saying I do their hair badly; I think they are right with that point, Tianna hair is struggling “I don’t want it, I don’t want cake either” rolling my eyes “right, is that because mom didn’t FaceTime you, I told you baby. The time difference is really big, she was asleep. I mean I am not excusing her for not doing it but she knows how hectic it gets in the morning, Imani is demanding and you know that, but she will make it up to you. I am here anyways; Rylee is also coming out of class for you. You love Rylee don’t you” she nodded her head “come then, big seven for you baby. I can’t believe my baby is growing up so much” getting up from my position “I think she is ready now” Tianna is hundred percent the moody child, but I think it’s because of being the middle child and the fact she was born so close to Rylee, a year between them. She always kind of lived under that, I don’t think she got Robyn like Rylee did in a weird way, and also Tianna put Robyn’ plans back a lot and then she got pregnant again, like she was not happy about it but it happened. It sucks but it’s like Robyn is sacrificing her family time for this, I am doing it all and I can only do my best with these girls. They be stressing a nigga out, especially Rylee. She gives me heart pains and Imani; those two girls alone drive me crazy I am getting grey.

Tianna is getting shy as we made our way outside and her class started to sing Happy Birthday to her, looking down at her as she held my hand with a grip trying to hide away. Trying to pull her forward “come here” picking her up “Happy Birthday dear Tianna” I joined in smiling at my beautiful baby, she is so overwhelmed with her grumpy self picking her up “awww Happy Birthday princess, you going to blow the candles out baby, let’s do it” she’s so emotional “dad, I’ll do it for her” Rylee said stood right next to the cake “watch out, go on baby. Blow the candles out” leaning her down “hurry up Ti!!” Rylee spat; she eventually blew the candles out “yay!! Big girl, a whole seven years old” stepping back and placing her down on the ground “you like it baby? It’s bratz? You like bratz” she nodded her head, crouching down to her “you like? I’m glad you do” pressing a kiss to her cheek “TT, why are you crying for” TJ asked, wrapping my arms around her “she is overwhelmed” looking over at Rylee, she is busy wanting to eat “awww it’s ok, your friends are here” her little friends are just staring at her “why is she crying?” Her little white friend asked, “she is missing her mommy that is all, but she is ok” she moved back from me “I’m ok dad” she said that still emotional as hell “you sure?” I laughed a little “yes daddy” she sniffled; she is trying to be strong again. Rylee made her way over to me “come and eat now Ti, you are creating drama” Rylee said, she is forever headstrong that girl “she will, sit down. We will come and eat” getting up from my position, she is so sensitive this girl of mine.

I was expecting to go home but I am sat with my daughters eating lunch with them “remember, uncle is going to pick you up after school, I need to do a little interview and I won’t be able too so he will come and get you three. I will see you at home and then we leave for London, I am taking you out of school for this” Tianna clapped her hands “remember, this secret is between us. You don’t tell mommy, ok?” These girls can be such snitches, so I need to make sure they are on my side “so why was Tianna sad?” Rylee asked, “she is missing mom, we all are and it’s ok to be sad about it” I added, I don’t mind them being sad about it, I don’t want them to keep this to themselves now “mommy didn’t call” Tianna sad little voice “she called me” Rylee is a pain, side eyeing her “she called the phone, but you were asleep” I shushed her “why she call you!?” Here these two go “ok, that mobile phone is being taken off you both, you can’t share so you both not having it! Stop” girls are a pain, drive me crazy with their pettiness “dad, why Rylee call mom and I can’t?” Tianna turned in my lap “you were being a pain, remember you had to go bed early for being cheeky. Doesn’t matter now, just finish your food” I am tired, I need a break from these girls too. I am pretty much the stay at home dad, I may be in Fenty Corp, but these girls make me so busy that Jen is doing all of the work, but I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Now that is out of the way I can go to this big boy interview; I am blessed to be invited for this “how long you going to be out in London bro?” G asked, I shrugged “I am not sure, wife is just busy as hell. Like she is just throwing things out, one after another. At one point I didn’t know she was in Mexico at one point; I just know she is in London right now and I want to catch her there. It’s her Fenty clothing line fashion thing, so she’s there right now. I know she is missing us. So I will let you know” funny that she is calling when I am speaking on her, answering the call “Rabbit killer, you missed my middle pookie birthday celebrations” it sounds so busy in the background “don’t Chris, I already feel awful about this. I feel like shit already, sometimes I just think if I am doing wrong. I did ask Rylee to put Tianna on, but she said she got told off, I am missing so much Chris. I just feel stressed right now, I feel so bad, but I know if I FaceTimed her I would be crying but I feel bad, how is she?” Robyn asked; I know Robyn is feeling it, she is feeling a lot of pressure. She did have to stop and start projects, things got delayed because of her getting pregnant, and then again she did but we good over here, I mean the girls do miss her when she’s gone “very emotional, wants mommy and why didn’t mommy call and then Rylee kind of stirred the pot and said I spoke to her and I told her off, but we all miss you” which we do, I don’t want to pressure my wife like that “same, what about my little pumpkin. She’s still being the menace?” I chuckled “she’s still being the sly naughty one, if she draws on her stomach one more time, I’m gonna snap” I chuckled “you’re so good to them, I said to Rylee don’t be hard on him, she goes he doesn’t do hair like you, he isn’t you. We want you, but I said he tries but you are being the best dad ever, they are lucky” I cooed out “thanks, trying though babe” it’s hard as fuck to bring up girls, I do struggle sometimes.

Since being with Robyn, since being a father to three girls it has really humbled me so much and I’ve changed, I know I have changed a lot. I got new friends, new circle. Investing in things, I am big on social media, I do club events, not so much now but I am well known so when Big Boy asked if I wanted to come on for a sit down of course I said yes, he’s a good guy “good seeing you again” getting up from the seat and dapping him “you too, the show is about to start. I had to pee, sit down. We can have a good talk; this guy is a genius. We want to know what it is like to be married to Rihanna” I laughed as he sat down, Herb is with me here, but Big Boy is funny “in ten seconds” the producer announced, chewing on my bottom lip waiting to be counted in. Looking over at Herb “you going to spit bars?” shaking my head “that isn’t business like, we got to be professional bro. Relax” he is dumb “big boy radio, I told y’all we have everyone and anybody on the show and I have been seeing this guy a lot, you all may know him as Breezy, Chris Brown or Rihanna’ husband or for me. The luckiest motherfucker on this planet” I chuckled “we have Chris Brown on the show!” he shouted, the producers in the room clapped “what’s up?” I said smiling “we got Herb, Chris’ prodigy and friend. I just want to introduce Chris properly; I feel like I am not giving him the props and that is unfair of me. We have a young black man that was locked up, he’s come out, put his head down. Opened a clothing line, met his wife, ended up moving onto be a vice president, modelled. And then now he is moving onto handling music artists. He has given back to single fathers, you have a foundation specifically for single black fathers, I want to get into that really. How did that come about for you?” I feel proud of me, he didn’t even add Rihanna into that “erm, well I would be a hypocrite to say I know how it feels to be a single father or be in a household that has that but my best friend, my brother. He is a single father of a son. He lives in LA with his son and erm he just turned to me and said there is so many black fathers that are taking care of their kids with no help, nobody actually looks at them they see mothers. The help is always there for them, so we set up a group and we see these men just stepping up and it’s nice to see. We help them with getting jobs and stuff for the kids, tips too. It’s hard having daughters; I don’t know how anyone man does it without a woman to help them. So I have my mom come in, helps these men to do their daughters hair. She comes in every so often, because she is in VA, but they appreciate it so much. We have centres here and in New York, it’s beautiful to see black men stepping up because nobody ever speaks on them, we have that title that we don’t so yeah” rubbing the back of my head “amazing work Chris, it’s true. We don’t speak on that, we really don’t and when I read what you started, I thought yes. A black man helping other black men to rise, this is why when I saw you at Diddy party, I was donating. This is the moment, so I had to do this brother and get you on the show” dapping Big Boy as he reached his hand over to me.

“So Chris the biggest question here is, what is it like to be married to Rihanna? Come on, we all got that question, how long you been married for now? Seven, eight years now? You sure did put a ring on it quick too” I laughed “yeah, I had too. Actually it’s nine years and it has it’s testing times. Every marriage there is testing times like now, we are apart. She is in London, and I am here, I know people are saying. I say people but I know these people, they are like your home with the kids, and she is running around the country, one minute here, and the next she is in New Zealand and then China. This has nothing to do with them, I don’t mind it. My wife is living out her dream who am I to hold her back? I can work in Cali; I don’t need to be there. I can work from home and be here for the kids, why do we need to start jet setting around and disrupt the kids. I do miss her, it’s hard. Having three daughters, it’s so hard but being married to Rihanna is fruitful in many ways” I busted out laughing “as we can see, you got three kids nigga” Big Boy added “I don’t think it would have stopped, but Rihanna she had to hold back on her dream because she got pregnant again, then another year out, she released the album, and it was around the time she came back from the USA leg of the tour, she fell pregnant again, then her dream got put on hold again, so this whole Fenty Corp was in waiting for long, now I am kind of banned from sex” everyone laughed with me “I don’t blame her, how did you feel to have three girls? You must have felt damn, again!?” I sighed out “Rylee I was like yes, a girl. I am happy. Then with Tianna, we didn’t even find out, so I was like yes, a boy. Waiting there, the nurse turned to me and said girl, I was like ok I can take that, two girls. And then the third one, I shed a tear. Like not going to front, I did. But they are all my princesses, I am getting grey, quick too. I am going to die early; I am really just battling these girls. I got my youngest just being a wrecking ball, she is four and I be telling the eldest two and she is in the background just breaking the girl’s stuff, I don’t like telling her off because she reminds me of me” Big Boy cooed out “so you got a favourite?” I just smiled not saying a word “she is youngest too, so it happens brother” I miss Imani actually.

I haven’t packed anything come to think of it but I am home and I can only imagine the mess of the home, I do fucking miss Robyn. I be working hard here, it’s hard being here but I also don’t want to ask for help because it’s a think of if I ask my mom, then Monica doesn’t like it, she wants to be here too then Monica gets at Robyn because she isn’t home, she isn’t being a mother so it’s like I have to get on with it. Opening the front door, I can just hear screams of course. They are playing, it’s like schools out for them, I am taking them out of school just to go London to see Robyn, I miss her and the girls do too. Placing my car key in my pocket making my way to the noise “you kids are crazy” Imani saw me “mamacita!” she is just the sweetest “daddy” she ran to me “you been playing in dirt again?” picking her up, she didn’t answer me put yank my hat off “bro” walking towards TJ “just watching them play, they adamant they wanted to play in the pool” they really had to get the toys out “thanks for picking them up, you didn’t want to go in the water?” I asked “no!” she spat, frowning at her “I ain’t trust them with her, you know. So she stayed with uncle, didn’t you!” she nodded her head “he gave me cookies! I want juice” I bet she does after getting cookies “and what we say when we want cookies? The word” Imani played with my hat before placing it on her head “please!” she said it so I will.

These kids think they can get away with no cleaning the shit they bring out “Camron, I will whoop your ass too boy. Get your white ass outside and help” I caught him sneaking off “you know what TJ, this is the first time since Robyn left to go that we ordered pizza, I cook. Honest, but you know. It’s the night before we go so I thought why not, but once I get them all in bed then I will pack things” I dragged out, Robyn is calling. I stared at the call and then looked over at the kids “you not picking it up” I shook my head “if I do then they aren’t going to complete the task, and all they do. Including Imani will argue over the phone when she is on, I will call back when they are less hype. I am going to have it out with Robyn, not in a bad way but I want her to be at home more. Not even for me, the girls. It’s been a month now, she hasn’t been here, and they are missing her badly, I feel like I am not fulfilling their girly thing. Even Mel, she isn’t here none of the girls are so it’s like they miss that. We need to speak on it, they are growing, and they need her as much as they need me, you know” TJ nodding his head “tell her Camron does too” I chuckled “you take Tianna and I take Camron, I need a son” TJ laughed out “our kids are so lucky, I was just thinking and I am like the life they live is blessed, I am happy though. I am glad I have Camron with me” my smile grew, Rylee mean mugged me. She is Robyn, she hates when I am smiling when she is cleaning “I deadass nearly fell out laughing, Rylee came into bedroom and obviously Robyn ain’t here, so I am like clothes on the floor here and there, she goes mom doesn’t allow clothes on the floor dad, it’s a mess, pick it up. I stared at her and was like oh my god. You are literally Robyn, scary though” it does scare me “I am training Camron to look after his sisters, he got three too” I feel for that boy, even Imani bullies him so he got a lot to deal with.

#Chrianna #Chrianna FF #Chrianna Fanfic #Fanfiction #Fanfic

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dangan-happy · 3 years

Note

[PW: Beep boop, I'm stuck in a chicken coop]

(Idk what to tw/cw this as, sadly. I guess self doubt?)

To Kiibo and Kaito;

Hello, this is my first time here, but you guys can call me Fanatic Anon. I just took two tests, and the first one didn't really bother me but the second one did. The second one was a reading test, and I have a lot of trouble reading. It made me feel really bad about myself since it's a normal and easy ability that everybody should have, but I don't. I can read it, but I often can't pick up the information I get from it. I also feel bad about self diagnosing myself with adhd and ocd. I relate to a lot, if not, all the symptoms of adhd and a lot of the symptoms of ocd too. Sometimes I feel like I don't actually have it and I'm just looking for attention, and which I might not have it and I just can't function properly. I also get annoyed really easily, usually when someone says something, for example; someone can like a ship I don't ship, and it's a valid ship, and I'll just get annoyed. I just feel like I'm a bad person because of that and I shouldn't be annoyed so easily especially because it's usually something I don't agree with. Also my friends are really aggressive to me and I always end up recoiling a little in fear, and I know they're just playing, but it still scares me and whenever I tell them to stop they don't listen.

Anyways, that's all for now. Thanks in advance!

- Fanatic Anon

What's up and welcome bro!! I'm your host, Mr. Luminary of the Stars! Man, I swear I'm gonna scare people off this blog, my bad, I hope your day's going well! Fanatic anon huh?! I feel like there's some wordplay somewhere in there. Fanon, fa-non-tic, I don't know. Ok, random bullshit over, time to do my actual job! Damn, two tests at once? That's never fun, good job getting through them though! Yikes, reading. I'm not too great at reading either, don't worry. I know a lot of people make fun of reading ability which isn't cool. A lot of people have reading struggles, and that's ok. It's seriously not something to make fun of. Hey man, don't feel bad. Reading isn't easy for everyone like I said, you can't help it and it's ok. Yeah, I kinda do that with reading too. I usually have to read things two or three times over so the information sticks. From what I've heard, a lot of people do that, so maybe reading stuff multiple times over can help you out. If there's not enough time in the test for that, maybe you can ask for a time extension, there's no shame in that. You seriously can't help your reading struggles, it's not your fault and if your teacher has brain cells, they'll give you a little extra support.

Ok, self diagnosing anything is a slippery slope, but I can totally understand seeing similarities in the diagnosis and your own behavior. I don't think you're looking for attention if you're genuinely struggling. This is probably an obvious answer, but I think the best solution for this is to see if you can get tested for these things for real. If I could diagnose you I would, but like I can't do that, I'm no doctor of the stars. Do stars even need doctors?? Ok, that's a question for another time, so moving on!

Ships are crazy man, that's kind of a given. I'm not even gonna give my opinions on shipping because I'm scared I'll accidentally start something. The point is that it's ok to have your own opinion and get annoyed, you can't help how you feel. However, there's a difference between feeling your feelings and forcing those feelings on someone else. You don't have to like every ship, but you also don't have to force your opinions on everyone else. It's a lesson lots of people in the shipping community need to learn, and in my opinion you're doing pretty damn awesome bro! As long as you're keeping any annoyance to yourself and keeping things civil in public, everything seems a-ok to me.

Ok, as a friend who often takes things too far, I'm gonna assume that your friends don't mean any harm, but your feelings are one hundred percent valid. If you've told them to stop and they haven't you gotta sit down with them and have a serious talk. If these people are really your friends, they'll realize you're serious and make an effort to change things. You're not being selfish or unreasonable or anything, you have a right to be comfortable in your interactions. So advocate for your needs! Alright, I think I covered it all. You're welcome man! I'm glad you came to the blog! I know you already said you're going by fanatic anon, but I keep reading it as fantastic anon because you seem like a cool person. Ok, yeah that was really cheesy, but I'm going with it! You got this, ok? Reading, ships, friends, you can handle it all. Now get out there and be fantastic!!

----------

Greetings Fanatic Anon, it's rather nice to meet you! That aside, I would first like to congratulate you on getting past your examinations for the day. It's never easy having to get through one test, let alone two, so I'm proud of you for at least getting those finished, even if reading isn't your best subject.

Speaking of which, I should probably move onto that subject now. Well, it is completely natural for everyone to have their own strengths and weaknesses, and yours just so happens to be reading. Despite it being something that may be tedious for some, it's a challenge for you, and that's completely okay.

You may want some extra practice or even some extra time as Kaito suggested to help you succeed at the subject, and I wish to tell you that it is completely fine to ask for those things. You need to do what's best for you, and as long as you try your best, l believe that you'll be alright. Do what is best for you to succeed.

Though, there's something else that Kaito stated that I would want to expand upon further. Yes, I am mentioning the self-diagnosing. Listen, while it's amazing that you found something that describes your struggles well, it's also not best to jump to conclusions. It's probably best that you get a professional's opinion on this. At least with that, you can get more of the help you need in your everyday life, and also have some more confirmation.

I'm not saying it's wrong to relate to the symptoms nor that you're attention-seeking by any means, especially when you really do struggle, but rather that it's best that you put an actual label on it. Does that make any sense? At least, hopefully it does. I'll move onto the next subject now.

Onto the irritation, I wouldn't say that you're a bad person either for being irritated sometimes, or losing your cool at all. Of course, you can't be rude about your opinions, but that does not mean you can't feel annoyance by any means. You can't exactly control your emotions all the time, after all.

Though, I would like to agree with Kaito one last time. If you haven't already, try and be more firm with your friends. More likely than not, they're just messing around, and hopefully they'll eventually realize that you're being serious about their remarks. It could take a while for them to stop, due to habits, but they'll at least make the effort in to do so.

Anyways, I actually had a bit of fun answering this ask Fanatic Anon. Thank you for sending this in, and I really hope that Kaito and I were able to help somehow. I wish you the best in the future, whatever it may hold. Farewell.

#danganronpa #danganronpa roleplay blog #ask #Kaito Momota #K1-B0 #Kiibo #Mod Kaito #Mod Keebs

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iheartsunset · 4 years

Note

Taylor headcanons?

Taylor Papa Louie HCs

(Aaaaaaaa I love this boy so much like gosh darn he’s amazing and beautiful and second only to W A L L Y in my heart)

-Taylor Morales (sorry I love into the spiderverse too much) is a 20 year old professional dancer, baseball player, and Hotdoggeria worker who lives with his foster brother, Chuck, in their Tastyville apartment. One of the sweetest guys you could ever meet, he’s become a real pillar in his community, especially after starting a foundation helping at risk children and families everywhere. He spends most of his days lovingly daydreaming about his boyfriend and girlfriend, serving sports fanatics at the stadium, and doing stupid stuff with Chuck. He’s also studying to become a graphic designer for video games.

-He’s a generous person who is always seen with a huge dorky smile on his face. Taylor loves sports and has so much energy, he can hardly sit still sometimes. He’s also very chill and is not easy to anger or sadden at all, all qualities making him very popular around most of the people he meets. Secretly, he’s a hopeless romantic (or uh, just very romantic i guess since he did end up getting the guy and the girl?) that is practically obsessed with fairytales, rom coms, and Asian drama’s happy endings. He gets very flustered with actual romance though, and is one of the worst people in the world at flirting. A disaster bi is what you could describe him as. The only thing that keeps him calm while thinking of love is his extensive musical playlists, ones he has for every emotion he could possibly have.

-Taylor grew up in Flipline’s foster care system, periodically living with multiple families until finally staying with Chuck and his mother, Alessia. Having been raised by several indifferent strangers after his struggling parents, Taylor immediately grew close with his newfound family, even though Chuck was initially cold to him out of jealousy. The two have become the closest of friends, even calling each other brothers. After Alessia passed away in an accident during work, Chuck and Taylor have opted to stay together in the meantime. Chuck is thinking of moving to Calypso Island to be with Utah, much to Taylor’s dismay, but he’s still happy for his brother.

-After moving in with the Ferrara’s, Taylor met Cooper, an older boy who lived a few apartments down from them, and fell in love. He however didn’t have the guts to say anything until 6 years later, although he had been crushing on a certain blonde attending the same night college as him (Prudence, I should’ve just said Prudence). Chuck hyped him up one night to confess his love, only for Cooper to introduce his new coworker, Prudence, to him, causing Taylor to have a huge crisis since he fell in love with them both. Well it turns out everyone was in love with each other, so now they’re all together and they’re very happy.

-He competed on Flipline’s Got Talent as a solo act singer and a dance group member on two different seasons: the 23rd season when he was 15 and the 26th season when he was 18. Even though he’s talented in both song and dance, his acts have never gotten far in the competition, even though he is one of the more well known competitors. He doesn’t really care about winning, he just wants to show off his skills somewhere that wasn’t the street or on Tik Tok. He even made friends with lots of the other contestants (Scarlett and the Shakers, Timm, Cecelia, etc.) but not Bill and Booosy, absolutely not, just no.

-I think his voice would either be like Labrinth or The Weeknd. Maybe a mix of both?

-He watched reality shows and game shows all the time, mostly The Masked Singer, Jeopardy, Flipline’s Got Talent, and Dancing With The Stars. He also enjoys shows like Lovecraft Country, Once Upon A Time, Gossio Girl, and Friends. He just has certain media bookmarked depending on his mood and what type of season it is.

-Taylor loves to dance, but he will still sing I Don’t Dance from High School Musical 2 on the baseball field whenever he can. He’s memorized all of the choreography, lyrics, and even has the dang costumes.

-He actually doesn’t have many close friends. He gets along with lots of people and all the other workers, but he pretty much hangs out all the time with his besties Koilee and Willow as they bond over their family issues. Peggy’s another one of his besties and he’s also bro’s with Utah since she’s Chuck’s girlfriend, it Drakson and Carlo are sorta cold to him cause they’re kinda jerks. Anyways, he, Willow, and Koilee are an iconic trio with such different interests, but they’ll always do stupid shit and vibe with each other. Their outfits all clash due to their different styles (Koilee’s harajuku/decora kei/delinquent style, Willow’s gothic Lolita, and Taylor’s own athletic and baggy clothes), making them quite a spectacle walking down the street.

-He can’t hear anything most of the time cause he’s always listening to music or something on his phone, so he always almost dies in accidents he doesn’t notice or gets yelled at for not paying attention.

-All of his romantic gestures often go bad, like his heart shaped pancakes nearly burning down the kitchen. To make up for this, he writes Prudence and Cooper poems with Koilee’s help and leaves them in their bags. He’ll also do a my cosplay Cooper wants and will endure 15 hour shopping trips with Prudence. They’re just a wholesome couple I 🥺

-He and Chuck use each other as both weapons and human shields. Just imagine Soul Eater except instead of turning into a weapon, they just stay the way they are. Yeah Chuck hitting you with Taylor is not an ideal situation cause I bet it hurts.

-He often streams with Tohru. He’s into any game genre really, but he’s the best at retro games and sports games. He’s fine with playing Wadanohara, Among Us, Final Fantasy 7, Welcome To The Game, and other types of games too. He’s just the perfect gaming partner and he might even start his own channel since he’s so popular with Tohru’s fan base.

-When Chuck moves out, he’ll probably get a pet rabbit since Prudence and Cooper have pets and he won’t be left out. He might name it Batter and he’s very excited at the idea of having a floppy eared rabbit. He doesn’t realize that Chuck doesn’t mind having a rabbit around, but Taylor doesn’t inconveniencing anyone really.

-He mostly lacks common sense and has little ability to read the room, often getting him into sticky situations, which isn’t bad, but it’s inconvenient. Scooter crudely calls him a himbo and he knows what that means, so he’s started studying random trivia in order to seem smarter. Little does he know, we all love him either way.

-In a Papa’s Workers poll, he ranked 6th in popularity, after all 4 members of Scarlett and the Shakers and Carlo Romano.

-His pick up lines are really bad puns. Just go on tinder and wait for people to tell you pick up lines. Find the one that makes you want to cry the most and there’s Taylor.

-I simp over Taylor and I’m kinda ashamed of that, but yeah I do and can you blame me? He’s perfection Mr. Tony and Mr. Matt did an amazing job on him I am looking I am paying attention always have been ever since 2nd grade 👀

#flipline studios #papa louie #flipline #my hcs #prudence x Taylor x Cooper #disaster bi taylor #just like me lmao #i really dont like bill and boopsy #I love Taylor tho

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hecohansen31 · 4 years

Note

Hello love, I’d love to request a part two to the escort lady!reader Alfred imagine with the prompts 39, 109 and 5. Thank you so much and have fun writing!! 💕

WARNINGS: Mention of Oral Sex (Female Receiving), Slight Slut-Shaming, Exposing, General Angst.

“You taste like fucking candy” Alfred commented softly, as he kept on licking between your legs, and you gripped tight on his short hair.

That awful moustache of his making your thighs redden as it brushed against your tender skin when he continued on going down on you.

And you were close to reaching the stars, thanks to his gentle demonstration of affection.

Alfred was quite the generous lover, you had discovered.

And not only in the bedroom.

But you didn’t truly care about the money he’d dote on you.

You cared about the way he wouldn’t hesitate to listen to your rants, after your boiling nights together.

How he’d just adoringly look at you.

How annoyed he’d be by the fact that you had been belittled by somebody in your newest work.

He had tried to get you to let him handle the entire work prospect.

He had his own sources and might set you up somewhere that’d be truly fitting for you, instead of being a ‘coffee-bringer’ intern for ten hours a day.

But you had refused his help.

You already felt too guilty at the sole thought of accepting his money, for your time, although you insisted he didn’t need to do it anymore, since you didn’t work anymore for the agency and your appointment were all set up by you.

It had turned to being into something more than a simple agreement.

You honestly had wanted to get to know Alfred after the disastrous family event.

But at the same time you also knew better than to hope that a client like Alfred, with everything in his pockets, would fall in love with you, an ex-escort with too many problems and a reputation that was in pieces, almost as if you were a disgraced courtesan.

You should have broken the relationship, after your first encounter with Alfred had ended.

He had been staring at you from his comfortable bed, hazed by the amazing sex you had had, as you got in your change of clothes, having to go back home before it was too late, and he had persuaded softly with those rosy lips that had been on yours..

‘Stay please’.

And you had stayed with him, dangerously tiptoeing the line of professional and not.

You had thought at first that what you felt for Alfred was simple interest and a good sexual chemistry, but with time you had felt yourself slowly falling for him.

Which wasn’t a good thing.

Because he probably didn’t feel the same.

You were simply somebody who might get him and was nice for a night sex.

Whenever you focused on it, it just brought you down, ruining the few moments you stole from Alfred.

So, you always said yourself, you’d quit it, after one last night.

But you never did.

“… Gosh, I am so close” you murmured, throwing your head back on the pillow, as you comfortably adjusted, meanwhile you felt pleasure becoming stronger and stronger till it reached the faithful…

… and then Alfred’s phone rang.

You grimaced at the awful sound, and Alfred did the same and you felt it on your core, but he ignored the annoying sound, focusing as a true gentleman on working you in the earnest, pushing you over the edge.

But again, just as you were breeching heaven, again… that damned hellish sound interrupted you.

And Alfred had to relent his various attempts, laying a soft kiss on your left thigh, before he moved to collect the phone from his bed table as you crossed your arms over your naked chest, annoyed and tried to lure him back in bed.

“Alfie… I need your attention!” you screeched lightly, as he just laughed at your antics, but moved to grab the phone, immediately his expression moving in an annoyed one, meaning it was either Judith or Aethelred.

“Just give a minute, lovely” he mumbled softly, kissing your forehead, and propping himself to sit beside you, as he accepted the incoming call “… hello there, bro… what? You need to calm down I can’t understand what you are screaming”.

You expected Aethelred to either be pissed as usual with Alfred or needing a hand, but you were surprised by the fact that as soon as Aethelred’s voice slowed down, Alfred’s face became completely shadowed by worry.

“… ok I got it” he muttered, and although his brother didn’t seem in the slightest finished, Alfred closed the phone right on his face.

A few minutes before you hadn’t been able to think about anything other than having him back in your legs, but now you couldn’t help but be extremely nervous about what Aethelred had told him, as you gently moved an hand up to his cheek, surprising him with your sudden appearance by his side.

“What happened?” you breathed out, moving a hand between his hair, a gesture that always seemed to calm him down a bit.

“They found out about you and me”.

You raised an eyebrow lightly at his cryptic expression.

Of course, his parents knew about you two, so it wasn’t anything that should have come as a surprise.

“They know also about the… true nature of us two”.

And you understood his worry, but…

“… and it leaked out. It’s on tabloids already”.

Now you understood completely his bad mood.

You had ruined his reputation.

Fucking shit.

“… fucking hell” you uttered, moving away from the bed, as you moved to get your own iPhone and a robe to hide your nudity, sex being the last thing on your mind, as you moved to click around a few tabloids.

And indeed, you found photos of you two at an elegant dinner, but what was the worst was that the source that had leaked them had told them that you were nothing more than a paid escort.

You were confused about it all and your mind rushed to the person that might have said it.

Your family didn’t know shit of your job, as many of your friends and even if they knew some part of it, you kept the secrecy of your clients.

This left only the agency.

You could guess that somebody had spoken up because you had finally chosen to leave.

But again, your brain was too rushed to properly know who the hell they could be.

And you were panicking hard, when you felt Alfred’s hand, gently pushing itself on yours.

“Hey…”.

“It’s a disaster” you moved away unable to calm yourself or feel yourself able to stay near him, as you moved away from the bed, jumping up “… fuck, Alfred you should go, before the paps swam over here”.

“Hey no!” he tried to protest, as he moved to reach you, but you pushed yourself away “… we are, we can’t just ignore this…”.

“Alfie, this is the kind of stuff that ruins careers” you tried to explain at it, your voice thoroughly panicked “… you have been caught with what people think is a hooker…”.

“You aren’t a hooker!” replied Alfred, and although you were thoroughly moved by the fact that through this entire mess, he still tried to thoroughly defend your honor, you had to keep yourself rational.

And assume the worst.

“I know, but they won’t understand it” they would never have understood it.

They’d just take what some journalist had written about you.

‘Alfred York’s latest conquest isn’t what you’ll think’.

‘Hooking up with Alfred York’.

‘Scandalously at dinner’

“…yes but… “he kept on trying to speak, but you knew better.

It had been fun till it lasted.

“You have to go”.

And if he couldn’t see how much damage you had done…

… you’d do the right choice for him.

“You can’t be serious” he protested roughly, as he tried to bring you on his laps, but you pushed a strenuous resistance “… we’ll just stay here huddled together, and wait that it’ll all calm down”.

“Alfred be realistic!” you retorted to him annoyed.

Why did he have to make it all so difficult?

Why couldn’t he just see this for what you truly were: a rotten relationship.

“I am!” he moved to mimicking your tone, perfectly “… I am trying my best to stay calm, although this shit is scaring me like fucking hell”.

“… and this is why you should go” you insisted “This was a mistake that lasted much more than it was supposed to”.

You didn’t mean to be so thoroughly harsh with him, and almost went to console him as you saw the hurt in his eyes, but then stopped yourself, catching your hand just as it was lurching forward to him.

And he seemed to finally get the message.

He moved to get his clothes as a fury and put them on as you set yourself on the bed, almost wanting to stop him, to hug him tight and to ease his worry.

But you just couldn’t.

And when he was done, he just shot you one last look, before he rummaged through his pockets getting a few dollars out, as you tried to reject them, but he just threw them out onto the floor, again that brilliant rage shining in his eyes.

“I honestly have to say that I should have foreseen that this would have never lasted, honestly but to me… to me…you’re more than just a one-night stand”.

And the painful sound of the door closing behind him, was followed by the one of your screaming cries.

The following months had been thoroughly tough.

Although your name hadn’t been leaked, your newest boss had soon noticed the similarities between you and the girl on all the tabloids, not to talk about your friends and family.

Most of them had been low key supporting, you could feel their heavy judgement onto you.

Finding a new work hadn’t been easy and eventually you had had to move back home, in order to get something nice that’d suit your degree, but you were still underpaid and struggling every day.

But the fatigue wasn’t bad, even more when it helped with feeling less the breaking of your heart, as you went through the realization of having broken not solely your heart but Alfred’s, also.

Still you thought he was better off.

He would have found some pretty cute high society lady that would have given him cheek kisses and smiled at his sweet embarrassment.

But would he have been able to let out his darkest side, with her?

Would she make him feel as understood as you did?

Would he be able to have the same deep conversation you did?

… you shouldn’t have certainly over thought about it.

The most contact you had with him was checking his results, on the news.

Thankfully ‘the escort scandal’ hadn’t stained his reputation and many people had been ready to swear on Alfred’s good heart, a few online memes even pointing out that he was probably helping ‘the nice escort lady’.

And you, yourself, had laughed at it once, because it was just how he was made.

And you missed him.

With every breath you took.

So, when you had received a call from an unknown number, hearing his voice had left your breath frozen in your lungs, and you had just been unable to think that your name sounded better than said by his voice.

“(Y/N)…”.

“Hey, Alfie” you uttered back, unable to deny him your usual sweetness.

“I miss you” he breathed in, his voice so frail and shy that you almost wanted to reach out and hug him tight “… why aren’t we together?”.

“Because… because it is better off like that…”.

“Were you seriously with me only for the money?” the reply seemed almost an attack and you weren’t able to deny him the truth.

Because you owed it to me, at last.

“No, I mean… only the first time, but… then… I did it because I liked spending time with you, truly”.

“Then why did you…” you felt him sobbing on the phone and to know that you had caused him so so much pain, it broke all the stitches you had on your badly-mended heart “… why did you tell me that it was better over?”.

“Because I am a mess, Alfred” you tried to keep your tone normal, but it lightly became choked as you uttered the truth that you had kept hidden from him and also you.

Because you were truly nothing he deserved.

“… I… was in an escort agency and I barely make it through my day, each month” all the worries of lately came crashing down onto you, like a flood “… and you are the prince charming, the sweet heir to a fortune…”:

“I am also very much in love with you”.

The affirmation broke any barrier you had put in your heart.

“… and I don’t care if you are that” his voice was so sincere and broken that you thought that maybe, you hadn’t done the best thing ever in breaking up with him “… you were never that to me, and I thought you knew”.

“I just…” you bit your lips, to try to stop yourself from crying “… I thought I was doing the right thing”.

“… but is it what you want?” now his tone had grown aggressive, passion blooming under it “… because what I want right now is to fucking hold you tight, because I know that you are crying and it breaks my heart to know it”.

“I…” you were indeed breaking down.

Any barrier of prejudice and insecurity you had put up for him now falling down.

“Can I come to you, princess?” he breathed, his tone being more a demand than a question and although your brain told you to just stop the conversation, your heart wasn’t able to shut itself completely off.

“Please, come to me” you shivered as you uttered it “… come home”.

---

Smut Prompts List

Support me!

#Alfred #Alfred The Great #Alfred Reader #Alfred x Reader #Alfred Imagine #Alfred Fic #Alfred Angst #Angst #Alfred Smut #Smut #Alfred Ask #Alfred Drabble #Alfred Blurb #History Vikings #Vikings #Vikings Imagine #saxons/reader

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birlcholtz · 4 years

Note

you did bittyholtz so now how about bittyrans

bittyrans you say??? this is so fucking long it’s over 2.5k i’ve written full ass fics shorter than this i am going to bED

it starts with the PSLs, as so many things do. (do they???? idk i’ve only had like 2 psls in my life) PSLs turn into rans and bitty having weekly scheduled ‘get coffee and talk about the absolutely obscene lifestyle choices of the rest of our team,’ featuring holster and jack’s wardrobes, the green couch, and shitty’s inability to chew without talking at the same time, among other things

and THEN ‘coffee and bitch’ sessions turn into 'coffee and talk about whatever u feel’ sessions and eventually it just becomes a Thing. saturday mornings are for ransom and bitty. there’s still a lot of 'coffee and bitch’ happening, because it’s not like holster’s adidas slides and socks combo just went away, but they realize it’s not just expensive lattes and a half decent sense of fashion and hygiene that unites them.

they deal with academic pressure in such different ways that it’s almost impossible to notice the similarities until they start talking more and more and realize they both feel that pressure (ransom because everything he turns in has to be perfect, bitty because he has a ridiculously hard time concentrating on things that don’t interest him, like for instance many of his classes), it’s just that ransom has nervous breakdowns that feature a lot of crying under the table and bitty bakes things as therapy until he’s forgotten all about whatever he needed to do.

so what happens when eric bittle (unofficially voted cutest member of smh 80 times) and justin oluransi (the most beautiful man at samwell) hang out a lot?

well, the first thing that happens is that people stare at them a lot as they walk around but ransom genuinely doesn’t notice because this happens to him all the time it’s never *not* happened and bitty notices but he figures it’s just because Ransom. u know.

ransom also finds bitty’s vlog, watches like 8 videos immediately (holster: dude are u ok), and barrels into the kitchen with his laptop in hand like BITTY CAN WE MAKE THIS

and bitty’s like oh sure! and ransom’s like. no. i mean can WE make this. i want to learn to make it and bitty’s like FUCK yeah

over the course of learning to make this dish ransom successfully wheedles bitty into letting him be on his vlog, bitty’s subscribers are Shook at this beautiful man just suddenly appearing when bitty has literally never had a guest before. he and ransom struggle to call each other by their first names the entire time and it’s fun and silly and they DO actually get a decent pie in the oven so it’s a success ('teaching my teammate to bake a _____’ sorry i didn’t think of a recipe lol. fill in whatever u want)

and then the comments on that video blow up, mostly with comments about ransom, some are just about how beautiful he is, some are like eric…. >.> why is this man on your channel when nobody else has ever been. eric do you have a boyfriend and where did you find him

bitty reads all these comments and does Not mention them to ransom but he’s mildly flattered that these people just assumed he was dating rans. because it’s hard to stand next to ransom and still feel attractive oops

BUT he also gets a bunch of new subscribers, which is why he asks ransom if he wants to be on the vlog again a few weeks later and ransom is like oh HELL yes

but it’s too late. bitty’s read all the comments asking if they’re dating. he never thought about ransom in that context before but he’s read all the comments now and he can’t stop thinking about what it would be like to date him. oops

they do the second video, and bitty firmly tells himself that they’re just friends and he’s just overthinking all of those comments, but also ransom smiling directly at someone is a force to be reckoned with and bitty literally cannot stop himself from smiling back (it’s a good thing they’re the only ones in the kitchen because anyone else would probably explode from observing it. bitty smiling is much more powerful than he knows)

okay and like. if bitty thought the comments on the first video were a lot. the sECOND video with justin oluransi?? it blows up. particularly because of one part where bitty catches ransom stealing a strawberry and just gasps and goes “justin” and people lose their minds over it. eric is so appalled. justin grins in a way that is only half apologetic and immediately reaches for another one and eric literally almost yeets the pie down the counter away from him. people set it to music on tiktok (i know tiktok wasn’t a thing while they were in college let me h a v e this)

and let it be known, ransom is also reading the comments on these videos, and he sees all the ones asking if he’s bitty’s boyfriend and he’s like haha wait what and tHEn he goes back and rewatches the videos he’s been in and like?? okay he can see why they think that. bitty puts his hands over ransom’s a lot and ransom slings an arm around bitty’s shoulders a lot but that’s just normal for smh??????? right??????? RIGHT??????????

too late. they’re both overanalyzing every single interaction now

(holster: bro did you see this tiktok of you and— ransom: and bitty losing five years off his life expectancy? yeah holster: nono this one’s set to don’t rain on my parade/the sound of silence/et cetera you have to watch it)

ransom still isn’t in most of bitty’s videos because honestly most of his stuff goes way over ransom’s level of baking knowledge. but he still watches them and it’s kind of nice to watch vlogs where bitty is so obviously in his element? the way he talks to the camera is so friendly and charming and the way he bakes is so efficient and professional. and because he’s a masochist he reads the comments on those ones too and finds a lot where people are asking where justin is. but mostly he’s focused on bitty and how obvious it is that this is bitty’s THING. he just exudes confidence and happiness and it’s kind of hypnotizing honestly

(he also goes back to bitty’s earliest vlogs and is like holy shit BABY BITTY. SO SMALL. and bitty in those videos is still charming but a little less calm and collected— the editing is a little less smooth, and he can’t quite stop himself from adding editorial comments about his aunt’s and his mother’s different techniques. it’s kind of adorable. and like, bitty is still adorable— wait what just crossed ransom’s brain???)

because bitty IS adorable, just a little more put together now. he still gets more excited by discussing types of flour than anyone else ransom has ever met, and he still bops along to whatever song is stuck in his head while he bakes, and when ransom sees bitty after bingeing roughly half of his videos and feels something in his chest lighten, he figures that’s probably going to be his new normal.

and people in the comments clamor for more videos with ransom, and ransom sees these comments, and bitty does too, and ransom seeing these comments is why he pokes his head into the kitchen when he knows bitty is filming, silently waves at the camera, and then leaves again before bitty’s even noticed that he’s there. it makes it into the final cut of the video and the comments section goes wild.

ransom and bitty still hang out plenty outside of doing vlogs together— bitty eventually gets a few dollars in ad revenue from the first video ransom was in and insists that they go on a celebratory unscheduled annie’s trip. (annie’s date energy intensifies)

and while they’re at annie’s/hanging out around campus/bitty has let ransom drag him to the library for some reason bitty can’t help but wonder what it would be like if he was actually dating ransom. he can’t deny that he thinks about ransom in that way now— it’s hard NOT to honestly?? like ransom has been objectively beautiful since the first day bitty met him (and before that, but y'know, not as relevant to bitty’s life) and maybe it’s just his imagination but he thinks that ever since they’ve started making these videos ransom’s smiles have lingered just a little longer and there are more of them, too. and the vlogs have also shown bitty a side of ransom that he doesn’t see a lot, because nobody sees it a lot— ransom trying something he isn’t already good at. throwing himself into it with enthusiasm, actually, and that NEVER happens. ransom is not great at handling failure? but bitty gets to see him cut loose and relax and laugh at his mistakes and he kind of loves it and loves this version of ransom he hasn’t seen before

and ransom, for his part, has been steadily falling for the sheer force of bitty’s charisma when he’s doing something he loves, ever since he first found bitty’s vlog. and as he looks closer he realizes it’s not just the vlog— bitty has always had these depths to him, he just kind of lets them out when he’s baking? and ransom feels kind of privileged to be able to see that side of him so regularly

(also i’m just saying that ransom is very into intelligence and watching bitty fire off answers without even blinking to obscure baking questions where ransom only understands about 30% of the words is a turn on)

but ransom’s become a fan favorite on bitty’s vlog, and he keeps making recurring appearances and even improves a little at baking (which bitty always comments on when he notices an improvement— it’s half chirpy and half genuine pride), and people in the comments BEG them to do a q&a for like. a couple of months. before bitty is like uhhh if i want to make money off of this channel i gotta give the people what they want

so he makes a normal vlog but at the end ransom pops in and they’re like hey we’re gonna do a q&a for our next video where eric answers baking questions and justin is also there since y'all really want him there for some reason??? (but bitty says it nicer and less confused than that)

bitty immediately realizes why ppl want ransom to be in the q&a so bad when about 25% of the comments are about baking and the rest of them are about bitty and ransom. roughly three-quarters of THOSE fully assume they’re dating and the rest of them are just asking if they’re dating.

so bitty is like um ransom?? we should probably address this in our q&a?? everyone really wants to know if we’re dating??

and this interaction is incredibly awkward. i need you all to know that. it’s incredibly awkward because bitty is like 'okay so like YES i like ransom in more than a friend way but this is literally the worst scenario ever i literally can’t believe my subscribers are calling me out for making eyes at him’ and ransom is like 'fuck fuck fuck i want to date bitty but i don’t want to make it weird is it weird??? because of his vlog?????? what do i do??????’

but anyway then ransom is like uh yeah we should address that! and then like. says nothing

and bitty’s like uuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh. sooooooooooooo. what do we say

and ransom’s like. :0. um. (the amount of ums and uhs in this conversation are astonishing let me say) well. are we dating??

and bitty genuinely can’t tell if ransom actually meant that as a question or if it was sarcastic and he says as much and ransom is like no that was a real question i actually don’t know if we’re dating or not?

and bitty is like holy shit i can’t believe this is happening what the fuck and he says well. we should um. clear that up. before the q&a

and ransom’s like yeah we should. uh. like. we COULD be dating.

and bitty’s like ….yeah yeah we could. are we?

and ransom’s like do you want to be?

and bitty’s like do you want to be?

and ransom’s like i asked first and bitty’s like damn u got me there. and then he’s like yeah i …. kinda want to be dating and ransom is like swawesome me too glad we cleared that up, how was ur lit seminar and bitty is like HOLD ON JUSTIN OLURANSI because did that just fuckin happen??? we can’t just MOVE ON from that conversation that fast????

so they wind up talking about how basically bitty’s vlog inspired Feelings in both of them and it’s very emotional because ransom is like i love that i feel like i can make mistakes around you and bitty is like i love that you put in the effort to learn about what i care about and they go to annie’s because That’s What They Do and get matching drinks as they always do and smile at each other the whole time (bitty is also literally pinching himself because What The Fuck, how did i wheel JUSTIN OLURANSI) and then they go back to the haus and start picking the questions to respond to in their q&a

ransom does get busier and can’t spend as much time in bitty’s vlogs as usual but he helps bitty plan out what he’s going to talk about when, when to post, the ideal ratio of how-to videos versus just answering questions, and with his help bitty’s vlog starts getting a lot of attention and a lot of subscribers, like, exponentially fast

(it helps that they got memed so early on)

(it also helps that their q&a video where they confirmed they were dating was fucking adorable because they talked about how they got together and how a big part of it was bc of bitty’s vlog and it’s just the sweetest goddamn thing and that video totally blows up too)

(intentional celebrity eric bittle. accidental celebrity justin oluransi.)

it gets to a point where bitty is like. making legitimate money from his vlog and he INSISTS on compensating ransom in some way (ransom: i like helping you??? bitty: and i like making my vlog doesn’t mean i don’t like getting things out of it) so they work out a system where ransom gets some money for helping bitty plan out videos and edit and he gets some more for videos he’s in and like?? they’re icons.

some headcanons:

ransom successfully convinces bitty to wear sperrys

bitty boops ransom’s nose so often that there are compilations of it

bitty also spends a lot of time with ransom when he’s studying for tests because being just like. physically there, like leaning on ransom’s shoulder or holding his hand helps reassure ransom a little

ransom always holds bitty’s face in his hands before kissing him and bitty thinks it’s the best thing ever

there’s an entire swallow issue about them

bitty’s name in ransom’s phone is 'eric butter

bitty tells his parents ransom has been helping him with his vlog before he tells them that they’re together, and coach is like 'nice’ and suzanne bursts with such effusive joy (because ransom is great with parents) that bitty feels himself grinning

the Thesis Battle of 2017 is less increasingly sneaky methods of convincing bitty to write his thesis and more 'bitty read this article on the pomodoro method and then work on ur thesis for twenty minutes so you can bake pie later’ (dex asks ransom if they should cut off bitty’s oven access and ransom is like hmm. well if u do just make sure it doesn’t affect how the kitchen looks because if he can’t even film vlogs answering people’s questions then he’ll be really frustrated)

ransom and bitty shop for clothes together all the time and when it’s winter clothes it’s a constant battle between things that will keep them warm and things that will look cute. they definitely have discussions where bitty’s like 'okay do you think this is warm enough for me’ and ransom’s like 'no that’s warm enough for me you’re from georgia’

both of their snapchat games are INCREDIBLY strong. ransom’s stories are a work of art and bitty is a master of filters and they are constantly communicating via snapchat

ransom also keeps track of all the memes that surface from bitty’s channel and saves them to show bitty later

bitty’s channel gets bigger and bigger and more and more popular and his creative team gets bigger and more complicated to reflect that? but at the same time ransom is always his no. 1

#fun with rarepairs #omgcp #ransbits

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renaerys · 4 years

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18. “I think you’re beautiful.” (Boomer/Bubbles)

February Fic Prompt #8 originally requested by the lovely huinari.

xxx

This was, far and away, the nicest thing Boomer had ever done for anyone. And it wasn’t even for his girlfriend, but for her micromanaging older sister.

“Okay boys, you’re on in 10!” Blossom said. “Make sure you pause to pose at the end of the catwalk so the photographers can get some good pictures for the paper. Remember, this is for charity, so it’s meaningful and important work. You should all feel extremely proud of yourselves for helping out. I know I am.”

Boomer groaned and stared at his painted reflection in the vanity. His winged eye-liner, violet eye shadow, and push-up bra made him feel some kind of way, but it was not proud. As much as he adored Bubbles, and as much as he valued Blossom as a friend, he could not help but regret his decision to participate in the charity drag show, no matter how much money they were raising for the Townsville Planned Parenthood branch.

“How the fuck do girls wear all this shit?” said Floyd, picking at the tight fishnets under his miniskirt that were causing a wedgie. “It’s so uncomfortable!”

“Beauty is pain,” said Mitch, where he currently sat battling a strappy kitten heel sandal that was obviously a size too small for his foot. “Jesus fucking Christ, I’ve literally never been so close to committing shoe murder!”

“Is that a thing?” Boomer asked, pulling at his hair. He was one of the few boys with naturally longer hair, which Buttercup had curled and styled for him. The result was that he looked a little like Bubbles, save for the insane amount of theater makeup.

“I mean, is a shoe alive?” asked Harry as he touched up his fire-engine red lipstick in the mirror over Boomer’s shoulder. The dude was completely at ease walking around in Beyoncé’s Single Ladies costume.

“Of course it is! Every shoe has a personality.” Bubbles giggled as she made the rounds to all the Townsville High School Junior boys who’d signed up to participate in the charity show.

“Personality doesn’t equal sentience,” Mitch said, still struggling. “Otherwise, this thing would feel my murder intent and get on my fucking foot!”

He lost his temper and threw the shoe clear across the room, where Buttercup caught it before it could sustain damage. “Why do I feel like I just interrupted some dumb argument?”

“We’re at a drag show,” Boomer said. “How are you surprised?”

“Bro, you’re doing it wrong. You gotta tuck that shit away,” said Joey, captain of the football team and unexpectedly super down to get this show on the road. He did look rather fabulous in his leopard print romper. Objectively speaking.

“I am?” Elmer Sgloo looked like someone had used him to crack open a disco ball. He nervously examined his tight, sequined pants that left little to the imagination.

“Yeah, you know, tuck,” Joey insisted.

“But I thought I did!”

“No—here, fine, I’ll help you.”

Harry whistled suggestively. “Get a room, you two.”

“Or not. My sister will castrate all of you if you hold up the show,” Buttercup said. She held out the recovered shoe to Mitch. “C’mon Cinderella, gimme that foot.”

Bubbles laughed as she watched them all, but Boomer didn’t share her amusement. He looked sullenly at his reflection.

Butch and Brick are never gonna let me live this one down.

His brothers would be in the audience of course. Neither had been willing to participate in the show, of course, no matter what Blossom said or did. She hadn’t put up much of a fight; when Brick made up his mind, that was that. But Boomer, sap that he was, just couldn’t say no.

“Hey you,” Bubbles said softly enough that no one could overhear them. “How are you holding up? Ready to get out there?”

Boomer met her gaze in the mirror, and he just couldn’t deal anymore. “No, I’m really not.”

Bubbles’ soft smile morphed into genuine concern, and she spun him around in his chair to look at him properly. “What’s the matter? Boomer, talk to me. You look really upset. Does the dress not fit?”

He shook his head. Glitter fell from his hair, and that just made him feel even worse. “No, the dress is fine. Everything’s fine.”

“It’s not fine. Hey, look at me.”

He looked at her. She was so pretty in skinny jeans and a blazer over her 100% Human T-shirt in support of the event. Her hair was up and out of her face, professional for the evening but somehow still the cute, sweet girl he’d fallen for hard. It was stupid, he was stupid, and he knew she’d tell him as much. But damnit, he couldn’t help but feel upset knowing what his brothers and the other guys at school would say when they saw him.

“I just feel so…so ugly like this,” he whined. “Like, I know it’s for a good cause. And I really thought it’d be fun. For real. I wasn’t just doing it because you asked. Mitch ’n the guys are here too, it’s cool, just…”

“Just, Mitch and the guys aren’t Brick and Butch,” Bubbles said simply.

Boomer sighed. He wanted to rub his eyes, but the last time he did that Robin gave him an earful for ruining the makeup she’d spent so much time perfecting.

“Boomer,” Bubbles said. “I’m going to tell you something, and I want you to hear me, all right?”

“Yeah, whatever.”

“Hey.” She kneeled down so she was looking up at him and held his hands in hers. “I’m serious. Are you listening?”

“I’m listening.”

“Good. I think you’re beautiful.”

He scoffed. “Uh-huh.”

She didn’t laugh at him. Her hand pressed over his heart. “You are the kindest, most compassionate person I know. You care so much about people, even when they don’t always return that kindness. That takes an amazing kind of strength most people aren’t brave enough to have, and I think that’s super hot.”

Boomer stared at her. “C’mon.”

She tugged on his dress and pulled him closer. “I’ve never been more serious.”

He was surprised when she kissed him, heedless of the lipstick that would ruin her own makeup, but he just about lost his mind when she climbed onto his lap and made out with him right there in front of everyone. Harry whistled, and Joey and Mitch laughed and clapped.

“Get some, Queen!” Floyd joked.

“Oh my god,” Buttercup muttered. “I seriously need new friends.”

Breathless, Boomer stared up at his girlfriend as she very, very sexily wiped bright pink lipstick residue from her lips and winked at him. “If your brothers have a problem, they can take it up with me personally. I’m actually pretty hardcore, you know.”

Yes, yes he did know. He swallowed and nodded, speechless.

Blossom came back in, her eyes glued to her clipboard and a headset buzzing on her head. “Okay guys, we’re on! Harry, you’re up first, so go line up. Remember, as flamboyant as possible. This is to make people happy so they want to donate the big bucks.” She looked around the room and smiled sincerely. “You all look fabulous, holy cow.”

“I swear to god, if this doesn’t, like, end with free birth control for all, I’m officially quitting the human race,” Mitch said.

“I like your energy, Mitch. Keep that going out there,” Blossom said. She clapped her hands. “Let’s go, the music’s starting!”

Bubbles helped Boomer up. He ran his thumb over her lip to wipe away some of the lipstick she’d missed. “Well, here I go to my social suicide. Guess there’s worse ways to go that don’t help at-risk women.”

Bubbles grinned. “Your feminism is a big turn on for me right now.”

“…Wait, for real?”

“Boomer, go! Stop staring at Bubbles and get your cute butt out there!” Blossom swooped over and grabbed him by the elbow.

“Wait, Bubbles, for real though?” he called after her.

They’d talked about, you know, going all the way, but only in passing, metaphorically speaking. Could she really mean…???

The spotlight was bright and the music was loud, but Boomer forgot all about his trepidation thinking about Bubbles’ smile, the way she’d kissed him so confidently, and her genuine words. Who cared what Butch and Brick thought? It suddenly seemed so insignificant as he took the stage to a crowd of cheering, screaming people all looking for a fun night out. Joey high-fived him enthusiastically as they passed on the catwalk, and Boomer couldn’t stop himself smiling.

Maybe, doing something to help people wasn’t so bad.

#Boomubbles #Blues #Boomer #Bubbles #Powerpuff Girls #PPG #Powerpuff Girls fanfiction #February Fic Prompts #repost #i am so weak for these two

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okimargarvez · 4 years

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FIRST DATE

Original title: First date.

Prompt: Luke asks Pen a date in a particular way.

Warning: none.

Genre: romantic, fluff.

Characters: Penelope Garcia, Luke Alvez, Phil Brooks, Roxy.

Pairing: Garvez.

Note: oneshot 70 in Garvez collection.

Legend: 🐶.

Song mentioned: Persone silenziose, Luca Carboni feat Tiziano Ferro.

GARVEZ STORIES

Note: this is not about episode 15x10. I written it weeks before seeing that moment. It was just a dream (one of the little about garvez) I made.

FIRST DATE

There are some silent people, there are timid presences hidden among people... but silence makes noise, the eyes have an amplifier... those eyes that have always been used to listening...

Hearing his cell phone vibrate, for a moment Luke fears that they have a new case. He looks at the display and smiles. -Alvez.- he gasps, trying to catch his breath. Roxy runs around him, agitated by the unexpected break.

The friend on the other end of the line chuckles. -Hey, brother, how are you?- he caresses the dog, calming him down. -Am I bother you?- he sighs.

-Never! I was running with Rox!- she barks, greeting Phil in her own way.

-You really have to find a girl, Luke.- he lovingly scolds him. Latin smiles inside himself. I'm just working on it. -About this... Did I mention my physiotherapist, Lisa? She's very pretty. I was wondering... would you like to have a double date? She, Penelope, you and I.- Luke's brain freezes on hearing that name. The heart starts pumping blood again at a speed not recommended. -What do you say? Hey, man, are you still there?- he blinks several times to recover.

-Yes, yes, I’m, but... What does your proposal mean? Do you know? Is it so obvious?- he blushes, but at the same time he is unable to get that grimace of absolute joy out of his face that appears every time he accidentally thinks of her.

-I understand what? Oh, wait. I hoped I saw wrong... You like her, don't you?- Luke runs his tongue over his lips, sighs in a teenage way.

-Yeah, huh, in fact... I asked her out. Or...- he scratches his head, nervous. -Technically I wrote her a letter. So, I don't know if you can consider it…- he recognizes Phil's exclamation.

-A letter? You mean paper letter? Only you can do such an old-fashioned thing!- he struggles to stop laughing. -Let me know how it goes, heartbreaker!- he is about to hang up, but he understands that he still has a joke in store. -If it goes bad, remember that there is someone else interested, not too far away...- Luke shakes his head. He doesn’t have time to put the phone in the pocket, that it starts ringing again.

He answers without looking. -Any other ridiculous joke, Brooks?- but he soon realizes it's not Phil.

-Alvez, we have a case and it's pretty bad. How long does it take you to get here?-

People who can't speak, who put their thoughts in order, people full of fear that someone might know their little and big... contradictory thoughts!

Although not many are convinced of this, Penelope is capable of being a professional person. That's why she notices the envelope just beyond her office door. But she decides not to consider it until the case is resolved. And so, she does.

Leaning against the backrest, she yawns. Her eyes fall on that envelope, still sealed, intact. She looks more carefully at the only writing. Her name. Penelope. She recognizes the handwriting before opening it. She closes her eyes, thinking that when she opens them again, she will understand that it was a hallucination.

Instead it is always there. She starts reading.

Penelope,

I can't imagine what you're thinking right now. In fact, she has no idea what she should expect from the continuation. For this reason, she decides to go ahead. Maybe I should have started by calling you Garcia, like the rest of the team. But you are not only Garcia, for me, and especially when I think of you outside of work.

Here, now her head is definitely confused. She has to read the sentence a second time. It's the same. It is always there. She's not just Garcia for him. What else, then? I hope you are still reading it. I wrote you this letter instead of an email or a message, because I had too many things to say and I hope that a little of what I feel has been transmitted to the sheet and that you can believe me. He managed to snatch a laugh from her and he is not even physically here. She finds herself stroking those sentences with her fingers. He is really so sweet... And suited to his style. A cold email could never give her heart pounding. I'd like to go out to dinner one evening with you. She jumps, risking falling off the chair. Luke's next sentence scares her even more. He seems to read her mind. Yes, I don't mean as colleagues or friends at O'Keefe. I mean a real full-blown appointment. Considering how they have always been going around the issue, without ever taking an effective step that leaves no room for doubt... well, yes, it is quite strange. Romantic. Intimate. Just the two of us. He continues to puzzled her, every word he adds.

In case you haven't died from a giggle attack now, I'd like to try to show you that it's all true. For once he hasn't guessed her reaction at all, quite the opposite. Laugh? She is not thinking about it at all. No, rather, should this irregularity in her heart beat worry her? Is she by chance having a heart attack? Should she call someone? I have been imagining that moment for far too long (more than I would admit). Oh shit, if he goes on this log, she'll really have to call an ambulance. I see you as if you were now in front of me. I see your extraordinary beauty in every nuance. Holy crap, holy crap. Her extraordinary beauty? Was he by chance drugged when he started writing this letter? Does he really think this of her? So, this is the reason why he stares at her for so long even in the least indicated moments. And I see myself, awkwardly, with my heart rumbling in my ears and sweaty hands, forcing me to ring the bell. And listening with tension to every noise coming from beyond the door. And your steps. He is a cursed poet, a director, an artist, because he has managed to show what he has described as almost real, a film, an anticipation... a spoiler aimed at the future. And then I imagine your smile a little uncertain, as if you had feared that in the end it would turn out to be a joke. Damn profilers; how can you play with them equally? I would make a compliment, you would thank me by touching my arm, I would reach to heaven. In Heaven just for a light touch on the arm? She doesn’t dare, really, Penelope doesn’t dare to imagine what effect it would then have if she accidentally came into contact with a slightly more pushed area... like the chest. I don't want to irk you; I'll spare you the rest of the evening. Irk you; here's the mystery solved, it's a Reid joke! But she doesn't believe it, never for a second. I will just tell you that I am sure I would have a fantastic time. Just because it would be with you. Damn bastard, what creature, no matter the gender, could decline an offer presented in this way? Without feeling like an idiot.

Because you are this. When I am close to you, it is as if the words no longer want to collaborate with me and form sentences of complete meaning... She knows the feeling perfectly, bro. But at the same time, I'm fine, you make me feel good, otherwise I wouldn't want to spend so much time with you. Well, it has its own logic. When love is logical? And why she thought that damn word?

I don't want to tell you what I feel for you loud and clear. I'd rather do it face to face; however cowardly I may be. And you're smart enough (actually a genius) to read between the lines. Smart enough, he says. And she knows it's true, but she doesn't dare to make assumptions. Lie, she already did. She did so whenever their eyes chained themselves for more than four seconds. But does anyone know this rule? Luke definitely doesn’t. Over four seconds means that the person who is looking at you wants to do something more with you, besides staring at you. No, not just a kiss. Of course.

I look forward to your reply, with trepidation and I hope I haven't ruined everything. For me, even just your friendship is important, but I could no longer live without knowing the truth, without getting involved. In her heart she wasn’t convinced that he would ever be able to take the first step.

Wherever and wherever you are, I wish you a wonderful day,

Luke

She emits so many sighs that she looks like a teapot about to explode, or a steam train. Has she really read those beautiful (wonderful, other than beautiful) words addressed to her by the Newbie (which for some time now can no longer be considered such)? No, she must have misunderstood, misinterpreted something. Instead it's all there, black on white: Luke Alvez wants to go out with her, a real date, romantic, intimate. He has swept away all doubts and loopholes. And now it's up to her, to answer him.

When was the last time she picked up one of her colorful and oddly shaped pens to do anything other than close a call with the team?

Okay, come on, it can't be that hard. He exposed his soul with her. The least she can do is try to return the favor.

Luke didn’t expect an answer so soon, on the contrary, it would be more legitimate that he had not imagined to get a real reaction from his blonde colleague, only... he needed to get rid of that weight. He still felt good. He regretted to not meeting her before returning home after the case was over. It was strange, but it had already happened that she wasn't there waiting for them.

He would lie if he denied he has thinking about it until his brain went out. Or that it wasn’t his first thought when he woke up, while shaving with a little more attention than usual.

Yet he can't help but feel some fibrillation down the path to his desk. And when he sees that envelope on the smooth surface, he reacts more or less like Garcia. At first, he believes it is a projection of his mind. He must touch it to accept that it is a concrete object belonging to this dimension. Penelope imitated him in a sublime way. His name, only four letters, seems almost a drawing, traced by her fantastic hands. He tries very hard to hold back the cry of joy that has gone up to his throat. It may also contain a negative response; but he doesn’t even consider this possibility. Usually he is not a positive person, but this time... He looks around. There is practically nobody, here there are the positive sides of get there early. So how long has that envelope been there? Did she leave it here the night before? Or is Penelope already hidden in her office?

A lot of unnecessary questions. He opens it and instantly his nostrils are struck by a heavenly perfume. Gingerly, he brings it close to his nose. Yes, it is hers. Oh jeez, will he come out alive in the end? He takes a quick look. The first thing he notices is that it's much shorter than his. But didn't someone say that the synthesis is the maximum understanding of the text? Maybe he's confusing the areas.

He starts reading, calmly.

Luke,

but he bursts already after the first word, which is none other than his name again. He must close his eyes and press his fingers on his temple, to achieve a mental balance stable enough to be able to continue. wow, a letter, what... Anachronistic thing. And somehow, I must admit, fascinating. Never as much as she is, but the bottom line is that... she liked it! A good start. It is useless to dance around it: you completely puzzled me. I confess that I find it hard to believe that you want to go out with me as... As an interested man. Why does it have to be so complicated to accept? She thinks she is not live up to him? What nonsense! If anything, the exact opposite! She could have any one man, doesn't she know? But he hopes she wants only him. He wants to be the lucky chosen one, more than anything else in the world. But I decided to get involved, as you did. It seems to me a story a bit too elaborate to be a joke. Yeah, elaborate… why does he fall even deeper for her every word? And I suspected that there was a romantic under the beard and the hunter's skin. Caught, Alvez. Never been so happy to be discovered by a girl, since elementary school, when he played hide and seek. Are you glad I used your same method? And also one of my favorite pens; enjoy the perfume, and consider it an appetizer for that day... He doesn't resist, he tastes the aroma a second time, letting his lungs fill themselves with it, closing his eyes like a moron, hearing Garcia's voice in his head that repeats the last sentence. An appetizer. It is so erotic that... he is happy to sitting with the lower half of the body under the desk. And by the way: you didn't indicate a date. Oh shit, she's right! How could he have been so stupid? He blushes, cursing himself. Out of the corner of his eye he sees that Matt and Tara are entering. He must hurry to finish the reading.

I wish you and Roxy a good evening, and I apologize you for forgetting Sergio 😉 And, here is a second unforgivable omission. But no, she said the exact opposite. She's giving him a chance. For real.

Your fantastic Penny

Penny. He savors that name on his lips, slowly. Fantastic, she certainly is. He puts the letter in a drawer at random, he doesn't need to see it again, he has already learned it by heart, even if he doesn't have Reid's skills.

Luke proves even bolder than she thought. Taking advantage of the fact that no new cases have arrived, he manages to find a way to send the letter to her the same day. Now that he has received a first green light it is really difficult to refrain.

She could access the video of the camera placed outside her office to watch him put it under her door. But it would be a slightly maniac thing. So, she just picks it up from the floor and opens it with little grace. She reads all in one breath.

Penelope,

I thank you for your magnanimity. Yes, you cannot imagine what pleasure it is for me to can hold a handwritten script by your hands. Do you understand now how hopeless I am? She's starting to get an idea. They are on the same boat. Do you think that a joke would be worth this self-denunciation and humiliation? You're right, for the emotion (and stupidity) I forgot to indicate a date, or maybe I was afraid that you might be scared of it, as if I had already decided everything. Yes, it is a far from remote hypothesis. Unless we will get a case, what you think about tomorrow night? Tomorrow. Tomorrow night. Just over 24 hours from now. She strives to breathe normally. And forgive me if I haven't been able to rely on post delivery times,

your Luke

Hers! Hers! Will he ever really be hers? Her boyfriend. Luke Alvez her boyfriend. It looks like a joke. It seems too real. And it frightens her.

She spends most of the day wondering what is the best way to answer him. She discards another letter because someone would surely notice it as she leaves it on Agent Alvez's desk. A message is too little and an email... Too detached. She wastes time so long that it is the moment to go home.

She is waiting for the elevator, always swimming in indecision. And it is at that moment that fate sets in motion. Luke appears from around the corner. At first, he seems almost frightened to find her there. Then his face melts into a smile. -Hey..- he is unexpectedly shy.

-Hey.- she replies with the same intonation. They look at each other for a few minutes. Weirdly, no one, stranger or part of the team, arrives to interrupt that moment. -Okay.- says Penelope after a century. Luke's eyes widen. She approaches him slowly, and puts her hand on his shoulder. -Okay, Luke, tomorrow is fine.- she whispers, making him shiver. -But you still forgot to indicate a time.- she smiles, going away.

Luke blushes. -Oh, you're right... it’s good 8.00 p.m.? Then you should have enough time to... You know.- she nods.

-It's perfect.- the elevator arrives, he lets her go up first. They are silent throughout the journey. Just before arriving, she approaches him again and places a kiss on his cheek. -Good night, Luke. See you tomorrow.-

The next evening

And suddenly you run away... without saying goodbye. Your eyes go down the stairs... I don't know what they are going to do, if to be moved or to dream... to get angry or to meditate...

Luke manages to hold back anxiety for the first twenty minutes. After another ten he goes into paranoia. Half an hour late seems to him a socially acceptable time to lose his head and call her. The phone rings empty. He waits a few more minutes and tries again. Ring endlessly, until the voice mail goes. Damn, why the hell isn't she picking up? It is on the third call that he completely loses his mind. He presses the repeat button practically without even realizing it. He takes strangely little time to reach thirty; thirty calls.

He doesn't even think for a moment if he should call the police. If something bad happened to her, what could a policeman do more than a federal agent (not on duty)? He drives like a madman to her house; he only went once but he has already memorized the route. Like whatever concerns her. He forces himself to park in a decent way and also to close the car; if someone would steal it, he would certainly be not be very clever, in case he had to take her somewhere, like a hospital... He climbs the stairs three steps at a time. He is already ready to knock down the door, he is mentally preparing himself for the act, when it opens wide and behind it there is her, perfectly healthy, intact, except that she seems very shaken.

He can finally start breathing again. Oxygen enters his lungs violently. -Penelope.- he coughs, as an inevitable consequence.

She just stares at him with terrified eyes. -You gave me... you gave a heart attack!- she puts one of her hands on her chest. Luke notices that she is wearing an open dressing gown that reveals a pajama. Did she prepare for their date or did she never give him a real chance? Did he just delude himself? He intends to get all the answers right now.

After the relief a little anger takes over, transmitted through a pungent irony. -Why, you thought you got rid of me forever?- but he doesn't last long, because she seems really too lost and fragile to be really angry. He already knows the reason for her behavior. He just needs to hear her say it.

-What?- Penelope asks, even more confused. Luke shakes his head.

-Forget it.- but he has a spasmodic need to touch her, any part of the body will be fine. -Why did you ditch me?- he caresses her arm, that thin layer of skin exposed to the outside world, and, surprisingly, she doesn't jump, she doesn't chase him away. -I waited until eleven o'clock.- is a reproach, but he has said it in the lowest and sweetest tone that is available in his vocal range. Penelope looks at him in passing. She doesn’t let her eyes fall into male ones. They are too magnetic. And she is in pajamas. And that's enough to embarrass her. Why does he persist in staying on her doorstep? She sighs, recalling the spirit of the Garcia of the past. The queen of ice. Anything just to get rid of him.

-You and the team wanted to play a trick on me and I ruined your party... I can't say I'm really sorry.- she is an excellent actress, even though she has never been able to exploit these qualities in real, private life... only on a stage. Luke seems to have taken really bad. As if... nope. It doesn't really care. -It's life, sometimes you win, sometimes you lose...- and instead, she seems to be rotten wrong. The man grabs her wrist that a second ago he was gently stroking and drags her dangerously towards him. Now she just can't avoid eye contact. And maybe it's better to not focus on his beautiful mouth.

That is now ranting at her. -What are you talking about?- the tone seems desperate, pained. -I will have called you thirty times and surely your voice mail will be clogged.- in fact it was really so. She didn't believe he would be able to go that far and listen to him beg her to tell him if she was okay, that the rest didn't matter, that he just needed to know that everything was ok... of course he shook her. But not enough to give her the strength to answer and reassure him. Why the hell was she so stupid?

Luke doesn't seem to think this of her, but the blonde continues straight on the road that will lead her to crash and collect the pieces of her heart. -I thought you would get there alone.- the voice, however, is already trembling, and she is wavering and seeking support in the door, rather than in him.

She reads sincerity in his face, yet she is unable to do anything other than boycott her own happiness. -Penelope, let's face it: did you think it was just a joke?- she doesn't nod, nor does she deny. Her eyes speak, confess. -Really? After everything we've written to each other?- a vein in his neck throbs, his face is red and his eyes are shiny. It's the first time she's seen him so furious. And to know that she is the reason... no, it is not at all good.

Even if she tells him exactly the opposite. -You're not cute when you're angry.- she shoots before she can stop it. This is not a thought that first formed in her mind and then was came out from the mouth. No, it born of nowhere.

Luke frowns. He is so puzzled that he lets her go. -What?- and she can no longer deny. She would like to have his arms around her back and his lips on hers. By this time, she could have already gotten it, if she wasn't an idiot and a coward. Never again, she promises. Never repeat the same mistake again.

-I won't take it back.- from now on she will be 100% sincere, even if it means having to suffer. She was never able to protect herself from the feelings that people cause her before Luke Alvez appeared on her radar. Why was everything different with him right away? She already knows the answer to this question too. She looks him straight in the eye. She could so easily fall in love with him... and it probably has already happened. -I said you're not cute when you're angry.- she tries to use a firm, stable tone of voice, even if a samba contest is taking place inside her.

Luke's face darkens. -But I'm not mad at you. I'm... just sad.- he has found a way to make her feel guilty, and almost certainly he is not aware of it. Both his attitude and tone are killing her. -It was so difficult to find the courage to ask you out and...- she interrupts him, practically caught by an electrocution. For a moment she sees him kneeling at his feet. No less insecure than now, despite they having been together for years. Willing to stay with her, even if she were to say no. And she can no longer really continue to doubt.

-Oh God. You really wanted to go out with me.- she starts shaking her head and at the same time her legs melt. Luke promptly holds her up, making her rest on his chest. He sticks his fingers in her blonde strands. Just to get this, the evening cannot be considered a fiasco, for him.

-I still want it.- he whispers. Then he sees her closing her eyes and trying to reach his lips. He barely rejects her, practicing violence against himself. -No, no kisses- Penelope teases him with a lost puppy look, abandoned in a cardboard while it's about to rain -don't look at me like that, don't tempt me, it wouldn't be fair.- he feels a jerk, but he has already waited so long that twenty-four more hours won't make much difference. Quite right? He could convince himself. -I want to do things right, with you.- because she deserves it, that's what he doesn't add. Because he doesn't want too much frenzy to extinguish their flame, even if he doesn't really believe it's possible.

She tickles him on the chest through the layers of cloth. -But between us has there ever been anything normal and ordinary?- she replies promptly. And she's right. Fucking right. Her scent, the same of the letter, clouds his brain. But he holds on.

-But I'd still like to try.- Penelope nods, giving up and contenting herself with embracing him and trying to merge with the male body. -Then, will you blow me off a second time?- it had to be a joke, but she catches the few shades of seriousness in it.

She sighs, touching his neck and catching his eyes. -I can't promise you that I will. I wish I could, but my... fears, sometimes... win and...- Luke nods too, because this is a fight he has often faced, since he met a certain Penelope Garcia, BAU’ computer technician.

He takes her face in his hands. -I hope you just know that on the other side there is a man waiting anxiously and with heavy heart.- the phrase seems too retro and artificial to remain serious. Straight output directly from a nineteenth-century comedy. -Look, I made you laugh, it's already something.- he rests his lips on her forehead. -It's all real, Penelope, you don't have to be afraid you can suffer. Do you believe me?- he feels her nod.

But she understands alone that he also needs to hear it from her voice. -Yes.- even if it's a murmur, just whispered.

Luke smiles. -Well.- he's going to do something again that is against what he really wants. Kissing her, entering her apartment, closing the door with his foot, as they do in the movies and scandalizing Sergio. What would be wrong with that? -Now I go home, I have to force myself, otherwise I would stay here with you forever.- her eyes are exactly asking him why he shouldn’t. -I put almost all the cards on the table, I think I can't do more.- he comes off with difficulty, it's really a painful action.

For her too. -See you tomorrow, Luke.- she greets him only. But then the man turns, before turning to take the stairs, and then she adds a simple, very small sentence. That changes everything. -I'll miss you!-

---------------------------

TAGS: @martinab26 @thinitta @garvezz @mercedes-maldonado @shyladystudentfan @pegasus-scifichick @paperwalk @inlovewithgarvaz @the-ellen-stuff @astressedwriter @symphonyashley @veronicafiore88 @kofforever @myhollyhanna23 @tootsienoodles @centiaaa shadowdreamer5 @penelopesluke @dumbdraws @onefail-at-atime @reidskitty13 @adorarapril @princesstreaclefanfic @glocknade111-blog @magiunific @fallen-novak @dreatine @hopelessdayydreamer Tell me if you want to be removed! ^_^

#garvez #criminal minds #cm #penelope garcia #luke alvez #penelope x luke #luke x penelope #tiziano ferro #luca carboni #persone silenziose

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broadwayyaddict · 4 years

Text

Sunflowers Never Die (Part 4)

The cemetery was silent. Time still felt like it was barely moving. None of them had anything to say. The three of them felt numb and their heads were pounding from crying so much. Anthony had his arm around Jasmine and her head was tucked against his neck. Anthony was holding Star with his other arm. Her eyes were glassed over and her face was emotionless. None of them knew how to deal with this.

They watched numbly as the casket was lowered into the ground, still not fully being hit by the realization. She was wearing her favorite blue dress and the hat Star had given her when they shaved her head. The thing that shattered them the most, especially Anthony, was the promise ring on her finger that he was going to give her for her 6th birthday.

Their friends and family were standing with them, trying their best to provide support. It had been two weeks since Brooklyn had died and all of them had tried to be there for the family as best they could.

As soon as the funeral was over, they said goodbye to everyone and went right back to their car. The car ride was silent mainly because they didn't have anything to say anymore.

When they got home, Jasmine went into the kitchen to clean up from lunch. Anthony went to help her and Star stopped in the middle of the living room, looking around. She immediately burst into tears, sitting down on the floor.

"Oh baby," Jasmine said and Anthony went to pick her up.

She started crying harder, wrapping her arms around his neck. "I-I w-ant her b-back," she sobbed.

"I know bubba, I do too," he said, letting the first few tears slip out of his eyes.

He sat down on the couch and Jasmine tucked herself against him, letting herself cry too. Anthony pressed a long kiss to her forehead, resting his cheek against her head. They let themselves cry together and tried to deal with the fact that she was actually gone.

A couple weeks had passed and they decided to send Star back to school, today being her first day. Jasmine got home and went upstairs, looking for Anthony.

He was sitting on their bed, facing away from her and holding the ring box that used to contain her promise ring.

Jasmine sat behind him on the bed, wrapping her arms around him. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hey," he responded, placing his hand on hers. "How'd the drop off go?"

"It was okay," she said. "She was hesitant to leave me, but she'll be okay. Are you okay though?"

He sighed, setting the ring box aside. "She wasn't supposed to leave this early," he said, his voice cracking.

He turned to face her and pulled her into his lap, tucking his face against her neck. She felt his shoulder shaking and hugged him tightly.

"I know, I want her back so much too," she responded, letting her tears fall.

"It's just too quiet," he said. "I don't know what to do with it. I don't know how to handle this or how to move on."

"Me neither," she responded. "I can't get that image out of my head of us laying in the hospital bed a few days ago looking at her baby pictures. It still doesn't feel really."

"She wasn't supposed to leave yet Jas," he mumbled, looking up at her. "How do we move on from this?"

She squeezed her eyes shut, leaning her forehead against his. "I don't know."

They spent the rest of the morning cuddling, looking at pictures of her, crying, and cuddling some more.

However, they got a call around 1 that Star had broken down in the middle of the hallway and couldn't stop crying. When they had walked past Brooklyn's classroom, she had looked in and saw the little memorial they had for her. A single sunflower sitting it a vase.

Anthony went to pick her up and as soon as he got home, they cuddled up in their bed again. They let Star cry and just did their best to comfort her and remind her that Brooklyn loved her very much.

It was that event that made them realize she couldn't go back to school yet. She was only 8, but she was still recovering and since she was so young, she didn't exactly know how to do that.

Jasmine made eye contact with him as Star was calming down and he pressed a soft kiss to her lips. She shifted closer to him and he wrapped his arm around the two of them.

"I love you two," he said, kissing Star's forehead, then Jasmine's.

"We love you back," Jasmine responded.

Once Star had cried everything out, they went downstairs to go prepare one of the dinners their family had brought them. It was quiet at the table and Brooklyn's place was still set there, almost like they were waiting to wake up and realize this was all a dream.

Star was exhausted from the day's events and went up to her bedroom immediately after dinner.

Jasmine and Anthony cuddled up on the couch together and Jasmine asked, "Do you think she should talk to someone?"

"Like a therapist?" he responded.

"I mean, it's pretty obvious she's struggling a lot with this," she said. "And we're still grieving too. Even on the days when we try our best, we may not be able to help her. It might be better for her to talk to someone who's professionally trained."

"That's true," he said, kissing her forehead. "I'll talk to my therapist and we'll go from there."

"Okay," Jasmine whispered, tucking her head into his neck.

They went to bed a little while later, feeling exhausted by the days events as well. However, Star woke Jasmine up around 2am in tears again.

"Come here baby," Jasmine said, lifting her into the bed. "What's goin' on?"

"I c-can't sl-sleep," Star told her, clutching onto her stuffed animal. "I'm sc-scared I'm g-onna die."

"Oh baby..." Jasmine said, rocking her back and forth. "I know it's scary, but I promise you you're not going to die."

"B-But Bro-oklyn went t-to sle-ep a-and sh-she didn't w-wake up," Star cried.

Jasmine rubbed her back and told her, "Honey, Brooklyn didn't die because she fell asleep, she was really really sick."

"Am I gonna get sick?" she asked, looking up at Jasmine.

"It's very unlikely that you will," Jasmine told her. "I know it's a really scary thing, but you'll be okay."

She sniffed, snuggling closer to Jasmine. "Can I stay in here?" she asked quietly.

"Of course you can," Jasmine responded. She rocked Star back and forth, humming quietly to her. Anthony was half awake and he rubbed Star's back, kissing her forehead.

"Sleep well beautiful," she whispered. "We love you so much and promise you're going to be okay."

She made sure Star was comfortable and continued humming, glancing around the room. Her eyes settled on the framed picture of Star and Brooklyn meeting for the first time. She sighed, looking down at Star. She was almost fast asleep and Jasmine brushed her thumb over her cheek. She closed her own eyes, kissing her forehead.

They all fell back asleep and woke up again to the sun streaming in "'M glad I don't have to go to school," Star mumbled, cuddling closer to Jasmine.

Jasmine smiled, rubbing her back. "I know it's tough," she said.

"I really miss her," Star told them.

"We all do baby," Anthony said, brushing his thumb over her cheek. She rolled onto her back and they could both see the tears in her eyes. Anthony leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"She will always be here with us," Jasmine told her. "Even if she isn't here physically, her spirit is always here."

Star took shuddering breaths and asked, "Really?"

"Really," Anthony responded. "And she's always watching us and taking care of us to make sure we're okay."

They would never forget the bright spirit she had brought to them and in some ways it would never die. Because sunflowers never die.

#janthony #oneshots #fanfiction #angst #janthonywithkids #marriage

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bangtan-sonyeonddaeng · 5 years

Text

BTS Reaction: Their little sister is self harming

*Trigger warning for self harm

Namjoon

You were wrestling around with Namjoon. He had been picking on you all day and teasing you and you had enough. While you two were messing with each other your sleeve rolled up and he looked and saw the scars on your arm.

“Y/n? What are those?”

“Um.. Nothing Namjoon just forget about it please?”

“I am absolutely not going to forget about it, what is going on? Are you hurting yourself?” You tug your sleeve back down and hug your knees to your chest.

“Yes.. I only did it once though Namjoon I just got really sad and overwhelmed and.. I don’t know it just happened.”

“You aren’t doing it any more though?” You shake your head.

“But you still get urges to, don’t you?” You hug your knees tighter and nod your head. Instantly he wraps you in a tight hug.

“Y/n please next time you feel like this tell me. You’re my little sister and I love you and I never want anything bad to happen to you. Okay? Your big brother is always going to be here for you.”

Jin

Jin knew you were self harming. You always wore long sleeves to try and hide it but he was way too observant and protective over you not to notice. There’s a reason you are wearing hoodies and sweaters in the middle of summer. He doesn’t say anything at first. He’s hoping you will decide to open up to him. However when he grabs your arm to tug you into the living room and you wince he knows you’ve done something again. He sits down on the couch and immediately hugs you tightly.

“Y/n you know you can always come to me for everything and anything right? I’m your older brother and I will always protect you from the monsters. Even if they’re not physically there.” You begin to tear up when you realize he knows.

“Jin, I-”

“You don’t need to say anything right now. Just, please if you start feeling like you want to hurt yourself talk to me. I’ll always be here to make you smile and laugh and do anything I can to help. You know that right?” You sniffle and nod your head.

“Good. Please don’t hurt yourself anymore. It hurts me too.”

Yoongi

When you opened up to Yoongi and told him that you had been self harming you weren’t expecting your normally strong and stubborn older brother to start crying in front of you. You knew he had his own experiences with depression and you figured he was the one person you could open up to.

“Sorry for crying. You’re my little sister and I care so much about you. I feel like I have failed as your older brother and can’t keep you safe..” You hug him to help comfort him as well as yourself.

“It’s not you Yoongi please don’t blame yourself.”

“Do you want to talk to someone? Like a professional? You know I saw a therapist and it really helped me.”

“I don’t know if I am ready for that step yet. I just feel comfortable talking to you for now.”

“Then that’s what we’ll do. Anytime you feel like harming yourself. I don’t care if it’s in the middle of a concert you call me or one of my managers and they will get me, okay? I’m always going to be here for you and I don’t want to you to do something you’re going to regret later.. okay?”

Hoseok

When you told Hoseok you had something to tell him with a serious look on your face he was immediately concerned. He sat down on the couch with you and waited patiently for you to open up to him.

“Hobi lately I’ve been feeling really sad and lonely. And I just feel like such a failure, so I-” You were struggling getting the words out so you hold your arm out to him and he sees the marks on your arm.

“Y/n what...? Did you do this to yourself?” You squeeze your eyes shut and nod your head. You feel yourself being held in your older brother’s arms. He always made you feel safe and protected and this time was no different.

“I’m sorry Hobi you must be so disappointed in me.”

“No sunshine, absolutely not. I am so proud of you for being brave enough to tell me about this. Asking for help takes a lot of courage and I am glad you came to me. Do you want to talk to someone? Like a professional?”

“I think I should so it doesn’t end up getting worse..”

“The company knows some people who can see you as soon as tomorrow. Do you want me to call them?”

“Sure.. will you go with me?”

“Of course sunshine. Your big bro is always here for you, you know that don’t you?”

Jimin

Jimin had seen the scars on your arm when you wore a t-shirt. He had knocked on your door and you told him to come into the room without thinking. His eyes immediately went to your arm as you had a few fresh cuts there.

“Y/n? Did you do that to yourself?” You see tears well up in his eyes instantly and you panic, running to the closet to grab a hoodie to throw on over your shirt. Jimin lightly places his hand on your shoulder and you feel tears forming behind your own eyes. When you turn around and see the look of concern in his you can’t stop them from falling. Jimin doesn’t say anything, just tugs you into his arms into a bone crushing hug.

“Please y/n don’t do this to yourself. If you ever feel like hurting yourself come to me, or your friends, or just anybody. You know there are so many people who are here for you and love you and don’t want anything to happen to you.”

“I’m sorry Jimin..”

“Shh don’t apologize to me. I’m going to help you through this okay? It’s my duty as your big brother to keep you safe. Even if it’s from yourself.”

Taehyung

“Taehyung what are you doing?” You see your older brother coming at you with a purple marker in his hand. He goes to grab at your arm and uncover your long sleeve and you immediately pull it into yourself.

“Y/n.. I know okay? Just.. please let me see your arm.” You shrink back but place your arm out.

“Turn your head away.” You do as your brother tells you and turn your head to the side. You can feel him drawing on your arm and your curiosity gets the better of you. You turn your head to the side and are immediately scolded by him.

“No peeking until I am done!” You crack a smile and turn your head back. A few moments later and Taehyung tells you it’s okay to look. You look down and see your harm covered in purple hearts. Immediately you feel tears well up in your eyes and spill over your cheeks.

“Taetae?”

“So the next time you feel the urge to self harm, you’ll see all those hearts on your arm and know that you have an older brother who loves you and cares about you so much and doesn’t want you to hurt yourself anymore..” You burst into tears and throw yourself into his arms.

“Thank you, Taehyung.”

“Of course. You know you can always open up to me and tell me what’s going on. I will be here for you, you can always count on that.”

Jungkook

Jungkook was shocked when you told him you had been self harming. You had when you were younger but as far as he knew you had stopped for the past year.

“I’m sorry Jungkook I know I probably disappointed you so much. I was doing really well but, some people are school were bullying me and it just got to be too much..”

“Oh, y/n, I am not disappointed in you at all. I’m glad you told me. Now let me help you okay?”

“How are you going to do that?” You see Jungkook reach for his boxing gloves and you tilt your head at him.

“Now give me the names and addresses of these people who are bullying my precious younger sister.” You burst out laughing and scold him.

“Jungkook no! You’re 21 years old you can’t go beating up random teenagers.” He sighs and sets his gloves back down.

“Thank you though Jungkook. It means a lot to me to know my big brother always has my back.”

“Next time.. before you do that will you talk to me please? I know I am not around as much anymore because of my career but.. I’ll always make time for you.”

“I know. And I will next time. I promise..”

#bts reaction #bts reactions #bts scenarios #bts scenario #bts imagine #bts imagines #bts #kim namjoon #rm #kim seokjin #jin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #jhope #park jimin #kim taehyung #v #jeon jeongguk #jeon jungkook

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calpalirwin · 4 years

Text

Night Out

A/N: Remember my post about the high-heeled princess vs the muddy sneakers tomboy? Yeah, this is that blurb.

And away, and away we go!

~~~

“Just a Friday night with the boys,” I told my reflection, my hands gripping the bathroom counter as I tried to slow my breathing.

If it’s just a night out with the boys why are you so nervous?

Because you’ve had a crush on Ashton since you met and now you’re both finally single?

Shut up!

These are your thoughts, you know that right?

I said shut up!

“Just a Friday night with the boys,” I repeated to myself.

Oh, if only that were true.

~~~

I had first met Ashton and the rest of 5SOS at a photoshoot after my friend had called me up asking for extra help when a colleague bailed on her at the last minute.

“Please Y/N?” Katie begged me over the phone. “You know I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important.”

“And you know I’m not like you. I take photos on my phone for fun.”

“Good photos!”

“I’m not a professional like you are, okay? I’ll ruin your business.”

“No you won’t. C’mon, at least let me tell you who the photoshoot is for.”

“Who?”

“5SOS!”

I sighed. She knew that band was my weakness. “Damn it, alright. I’m in.”

“Yay! You won’t regret this Y/N!”

~~~

“So, did Katie just hire you?” the tall man with brown hair and hazel eyes asked me. He had on a white button up shirt with short sleeves and roses on it tucked into fitted black slacks.

“What?” I sputtered, looking around to see who he was talking to, because it certainly couldn’t be me. Only it had to be because it was just us in the room. “Me?” I asked stupidly, pointing at myself.

He giggled. The real-life, not from a video clip, giggle. “Yes, you. Who else?”

“Casper?”

He giggled again. “You’re funny, you know that? Name’s Ashton,” he said, offering me his- very large- hand.

“Y/N,” I choked out, shaking his hand, trying not to drool over how warm and soft it felt despite his rugged looks. The man looked like a god, not a drummer.

“Funny girl with a cute name,” he noted. “So, how do you know Katie?”

“How do you know Katie?” I challenged, my brain forgetting how to work.

“She’s my photographer…?”

“Right… um…”

“Jesus, you are new,” he giggled a third time. “Relax. Loosen up a bit.”

“I am not new. I’ve just never done this before.”

“Think that makes ya new, gorgeous,” he winked.

Oh, God… I was gonna pass out. I reached past him for the water bottles on the table, busying myself with taking a sip, trying to ignore his presence.

“Wow, you are impossible to get to know. I asked a simple question. It wasn’t a rude one, was it?”

“She’s my best friend. I’m just here to help her out,” I said, trying to appear more confident than I actually was.

“Oh, so you’re not like a real photographer?”

“Nope,” I said, popping the “p” loudly. “I’m a writer. Well, I work for a publishing company anyway.”

“Oh, that’s cool. You do know how to use a camera though, right?”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m not an idiot.”

He held his hands up in surrender. “Hey, just checking. My livelihood depends on you and Katie not making me and my bandmates look like shit.”

“My bandmates and me,” I corrected under my breath.

“What was that?” he asked, leaning down to hear me better. “Sorry, my hearing’s shit.”

“I said that’s impossible!” I blurted, my cheeks flushing as I realized I had just more or less confessed that I found him attractive.

He just giggled again.

~~~

What I thought was just a one time occurrence quickly spiraled into more. The next time Katie called me to help with a photoshoot, she jumped straight to what I needed to hear.

“It’s another 5SOS one!”

“Great, so you want me to make a fool of myself again?” I asked, even though we both knew I was going to say yes.

“Oh, c’mon! Your pictures came out great, Y/N. And the boys liked you.”

“I tripped him!” I said, meaning Ashton. It had been unintentional. I was sitting with my legs kicked out when he had walked backwards into me. He had fallen, then did a weird backwards sort of skip to get his other foot out behind his falling weight to catch himself. “Make all the men fall for you like that?” he had winked.

“Oh, please! It was an accident! That man needs to watch where he’s walking.”

“That man needs to do a lot of things…” I mumbled under my breath.

“I heard that!”

~~~

“You’re not gonna trip me again, are ya?” Ashton’s voice sounded from behind me.

I whirled to see the man sporting short sleeved white collared shirt, similar to the one he wore at our first meeting, only without the roses decorating it. “You should watch where you’re walking,” I said, using Katie’s words as I scrambled to find my own.

“You this flustered with everyone, or am I just special?”

“Don’t flatter yourself.”

This time, instead of giggling, he smirked.

~~~

“Y/N, I gotta another 5-” Katie started.

“I’m in,” I responded.

This time, Ashton Irwin would not fluster me.

~~~

“I think you were stalking me if I didn’t know any better.”

I narrowed my eyes at the man, whose leather jacket and slicked back hair made him look like a modern-day James Dean. No! His antics of riling me up ended here and now!

“Trust me, I’d rather be anywhere else,” I lied. Well, it was half a lie at least. I would rather be somewhere else- a somewhere else that included him in a bed with our clothes on the floor. But, he didn’t need to know that.

His face fell at my words. “Oh… sorry if I made you uncomfortable…” Long gone was the usual giggle and smirk of a man who knew he made heads turn. In its place was a sincere apology that he had crossed some imaginary line. Even his hazel eyes, which usually danced with mischief were sorrowful.

“Oh, no!” I rushed, feeling guilty my words gave him the impression that he had done something wrong. “I’m sorry. I just… you… friends?” I asked, biting my lower lip. Friends? Really? That was the best I could come up with?

“Friends,” he nodded, a small smile coming back to his features. “You know me and the guys really like it when you work with Katie. We, uh… might have requested you this time?” he admitted, a hand coming to rest at the back of his neck as he dodged my gaze.

“You requested me? I’m not even a photographer…”

“You do good work. Plus, you’re like really chill and easygoing. Now that we’re friends, you should hang out with us sometime.”

“Yeah, that’d be cool.”

~~~

That was when our friendship really took off.

Ashton quickly became one of my best friends and I got along really well with the other 3. They were my boys and I was their girl. I quickly earned the title of honorary bro, a role that I took seriously, suddenly grateful for a lifetime of being a tomboy.

That being said, I was still jealous as hell when I had to play his wingman, wishing that one day he would see me as one of the girls he flirted with instead of the girl-bro who helped him seal the deal.

To take the sting out of the wound, I dated around myself.

But tonight? Well, tonight Ashton and I were both single at the same time. And I was determined to get my man.

~~~

The night out had been my idea. A lie that I needed a bros night out after a hard week. In truth, I just wanted a night out with Ashton, but was too nervous to blatantly ask him out. So, I was going to hide under the guise of a harmless boys night out, and pray I blew him out of the water.

I took one last look at myself in the mirror: my hair curled, bright red lipstick drawing attention to my lips, my black dress drawing attention to my curves, and my heels giving me just enough height to hopefully reach Ashton’s lips.

“Just a Friday night with the boys,” I said one last time before heading out.

~~~

Calum let out a long, low whistle when I walked in. “You said guys night, not girls night,” he said, wrapping me in a hug.

“I take it I look good?”

“Stunning. Is this for-?” He let his question hang between us. He knew I had a crush on Ashton. They all knew. All but Ashton.

“Damn,” Mike choked from behind me. “Keep me out of your selfies, please.”

“Too much?” I asked, biting my lip, suddenly feeling very nervous I was overdoing it.

“Oh…” Mike said with realization. “Operation Get Yo Man?”

I nodded my head fast, biting further down on my lip.

“Stop, you’ll ruin the lipstick,” both men scolded me.

“Whoa, Cal got a girl already?” Luke asked, rounding the corner. “Y/N?” he gasped once he realized it was me, his blue eyes wide in shock. “I can’t… you look… wow…”

“It’s Operation Get Yo Man,” Mike told Luke.

“Yeah, I can see that. Has Ash seen her yet?”

“He’s not here!” I said worriedly, twisting my hands. “Oh, this was so stupid!”

“Relax,” Calum said, his hands coming down on my shoulders, turning me to look at him. “Ash is gonna flip when he sees you. This is gonna work.”

“Really?”

“You look like a fuckin model,” Mike said.

“Says the one engaged to a model…”

“So, who better to judge?” he asked, his green eyes twinkling.

“Okay, picture!” I said, feeling excited again as I pulled out my phone. “C’mon, you two,” I said when Luke and Mike hung back. “Crystal and Sierra are both well aware of my feelings.”

“Alright,” Luke shrugged, throwing an arm around me, while Mike came to stand behind me, and Calum threw his arm around me from the other side of Luke. “Say Operation Get Yo Man!” Luke teased, my phone in his hand as he had the longest reach.

“Operation Get Yo Man!” we grinned at the camera as Luke snapped a series of pictures.

“Oh, post that one!” Calum said, once we let go and looked at our selfies.

I quickly put the photo on my Insta-

thefaby/n: Operation Get Yo Man with the best wingmen a girl could ask for! #boysnight #operationgetyoman #myboys

~~~

“Really? You took the selfie without me?” Ashton’s voice said as he slid in the booth.

“Sorry,” I shrugged.

His hazel eyes locked with mine, before scanning my body. “Whoa…” he breathed.

“Mate, you knew what she was wearing. You saw the post,” Calum smirked.

“No, I didn’t. I saw that Y/N posted, and i just assumed… whoa…” he said again.

From across the table I could see his Adam’s apple moving as he struggled to come to terms with the girl I normally was in comparison to the girl across from him. Good. He could be the flustered one for once. “Problem?” I smiled.

“No, no problem,” he said, shaking his head, going back to being unbothered. “You look good.”

“I know,” I smirked, taking a sip from my drink, making sure he was watching as my red lips wrapped around the straw.

“So, what’s the plan for tonight, boys?” Ashton asked, drumming his hands on the table and avoiding my eye.

“It’s Operation Get Yo Man,” Mike said, throwing his arm around me.

“Oh, so we’re her wingmen tonight? Alright,” Ashton said, licking his lips and looking around the rest of the bar. “See anything you like so far?” he asked, as simply as if he was asking if I wanted him to pass over the fries.

I drummed my fingers against my chin, drawing his attention to my lips again. “You know what? As a matter of fact, I do. Cal, care to dance?” I said, offering my hand out to Calum who sat on the other side of the booth with Ashton.

To his credit, he kept his face calm as Ashton got out to allow Calum to pass as Luke moved to let me out on our side. “What are you doing?” Calum whispered, wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

“Trust me. Now put your hand on my lower back. Touch my ass if you have to.”

His arm slid down my back, giving my ass a small squeeze before resting his hand on it as we walked off. I could swear I heard Ashton mutter a “Motherfucker.”

“You know, a lesser man would be mad you’re using him like this,” Calum said.

“You’re not mad, are you?” I asked, turning and wrapping my arms around his neck as he swayed me in time to the music.

His cheeks crinkled with his smile. “Nah. You help me get laid all the time. Glad to repay the favor.”

“Thank you,” I smiled, lifting my heels up to peck his cheek. “Think it’s working?”

“If it doesn’t, he’s an idiot. So, out of curiosity, why Ash?”

“Aw, Cal, are you jealous?”

“I’d be lying if I said you weren’t turning me on right now. But, I’m more than fine with our friendship staying a friendship. If you ever wanna fool around though…”

I placed my hand on his chest and laughed, feeling him rumble with his own laughter. “I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t thought about it. But…”

“But, Ash.”

“But, Ash,” I nodded. “He just… he went out of his way to make me feel welcome. You all have. But, he did it first. And I thought he was actually flirting with me whereas you guys were just being nice to me. And just…” I sighed, closing my eyes as I collected my thoughts. “Did I misread everything? Am I only friends with you guys to get close to him? Am I only friends with him because I want something more?”

“Hey, stop,” Cal said firmly. “Whatever the original intentions were, you’re one of us now. That’s not gonna change. Yes, we all know you’re closest with Ash. But our friendships are still real friendships. This doesn’t go away if things with you and Ash go wrong. You know that right? We’re your boys and you’re our girl. End of discussion. Case closed.”

“Thanks, Cal,” I said, resting my head against his chest.

“Anytime, Y/N, anytime,” he murmured against my hair. “Oh, looks like my work here is done,” he said, his chin rubbing at my head as he nodded at Ashton walking towards us. “Hey, mate.”

Ashton nodded his head curtly, his lips pressed tightly together. He was mad. But why? I liked him, but that didn’t mean my feelings were reciprocated.

“Need something?” I asked. I wanted him to want me. But I wanted him to want the real me. Not the girl dressed up who was dancing and flirting with his best mate.

“Yeah, can we talk? In private?” His gaze shifted from mine to Calum as he asked his second question.

“She’s all yours, mate,” Calum said, stepping away from me. But not before he placed a kiss on my cheek and whispered, “Get yo man, girl.”

I mouthed a thank you as the darker man strolled off back to our booth, leaving me alone with Ashton. “So what’s up?”

“Stop playing innocent,” he snapped.

“Excuse me?”

“This act you’re playing. It’s not cute.”

“What act?”

“This!” His hand waved about my whole body.

“I can’t dress nice for a night out with my boys? You’re not my father, Ashton.”

“No, but you’re like a sister to me. And I would hope my sister’s friends would have enough sense to call her out for acting like a… like a…”

“Like a what, Ash? Like a girl?” I challenged. I knew what he was trying to say, but I also knew he respected women too much to ever say they were acting like a tramp. He was all about women being unapologetically themselves. Why was he on my case about it?

“You know what I mean. This isn’t you.”

“Spoiler alert: I can be a lot more than the girl-bro. I can be the girl-girl too.”

“Yeah. But are you doing this because you want to? Or are you doing it to impress someone?”

“What does it matter?” I continued to challenge, even though part of me knew he was right. Either he liked me for me or he didn’t. So why had I dressed up for him?

“Would you quit dodging the question and answer? Is this really a night out with your boys, or is there something more? Operation Get Yo Man? Really, Y/N? Is it Cal?”

“What? No, it’s not Cal. God. You really don’t see it. do you?”

“See what? That you’re crazy?”

“I like you, dumbass!” I blurted. “I liked you the whole time!”

“Oh.”

“Look, I get it, okay? I’m not some tight-skirt, high-heeled princess. I’m the blue jeans and muddy sneakers tomboy. Both are beautiful. Both are dangerous.”

“Both are you,” he cut me off.

My face flushed. “Both are not me. Look, I get it. I’m not the conventional beauty you normally date. But, I’m tired of hiding. So, I’m putting myself out there. Ball’s in your court, now,” I said.

“Jesus, took ya long enough…”

“What?”

“Y/N, I’ve liked you since I met you. You’ve got spunk. You’re unapologetically yourself 100 percent of the time. More than that, you’re my best friend. You see me for me. And I see you for you.”

“You like me?”

“Of course I do! God, I was so nervous around you, I literally tripped.”

“You played it off well…”

“That’s because while you make me a nervous wreck, you also instill a level of confidence in me I never knew I had.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“So… where does that leave us?”

“I think it leaves us right about here,” he said before ducking his head down to kiss me. It was soft. It was sweet. It was fierce. It was everything I dreamed it was.

“Here’s good,” I smiled, breathless once we pulled apart.

~~~

The next morning, I woke up in a bed that was not mine in a shirt that was also not mine. “Oh, fuck… what happened last night?”

“You got rip roaring drunk, and ended up in my bed,” Ashton’s voice sounded from where he was lying next to me in bed, shirtless and scrolling through his phone. “Aspirin and water’s right there for ya.”

“Thanks,” I said, quickly swallowing the two small pills with a swig of water. Waking up in his bed with him next to me was nothing new. But, given what I thought I remembered about last night… “Ash, did we… ?” I asked, both afraid of what I had done last night and what we had done.

His phone clattered on his bedside table and he rolled over to face me. “What’s the last thing you remember, Y/N?”

“Let’s see… dancing with Cal. You and me arguing. Did we kiss?”

“Yes.”

“Okay. Then what?”

“Then nothing. You continued to dance and drink, saying that it was the best night of your life. Then you asked me to take you home. You’re a very needy drunk, Y/N.”

I leaned my head in one of my hands and shut my eyes in a wince. “Oh, God… Sorry… So we didn’t… ?”

“Have sex? No,” he shook his head.

“Thanks for not taking advantage.”

“Ew, don’t thank me for doing the right thing…”

I sighed. “We don’t go back to normal after this, huh?”

“Oh, you mean back to before we confessed our feelings for each other, and you ended up safely in my bed, untouched?”

I let out a weak laugh. “Yeah, that.”

“We don’t.”

“Oh, cool,” I fake-smiled. “I’m gonna get an Uber. See ya around, I guess,” I said, offering a small two-finger wave and throwing back the covers.

“Y/N.”

“What?” I asked, the room spinning.

“You can’t just leave.”

“Yes, I can, Ash. I’ve already made enough of a fool of myself. Let me go nurse this hangover in peace.”

He scoffed. “You can barely walk. Get back in bed.”

“You’re not the boss of me,” I said, taking a few unsteady steps forward before falling on the floor. “Ow… Ash…”

I heard his giggle as he got out of bed. “Told ya,” he smirked before scooping me up like a small child and placing me back in his bed.

“Shut up…”

“You’re ridiculous, you know that? Do you know why we kissed?”

“Because I’ve been wanting to kiss you for the past year and a half?”

“Well… maybe. But, it’s because I kissed you. Because I like you.”

“Well, that’s dumb of you.”

“Hey. Be proud of yourself. Operation Get Yo Man was a success. You got him.”

“I do?”

“Honestly, woman. Am I gonna spend the rest of my life reassuring you that I’m into you?”

“Maybe?”

“Alright then. Victory selfie for my hungover girlfriend?”

“You know me too well, Ashton Irwin.”

“Get over here,” he giggled, pulling me to lay against his shoulder, phone already posed for the shot.

I closed my eyes against him, grinning and breathing in his scent, feeling his lips kiss my hair as the camera shutter clicked rapidly. “Perfect,” I said, looking at the picture of us before putting it up on my Insta.

thefaby/n: Status Report- Operation Get Yo Man: successful. #operationgetyoman #successfulmission #myman

#night out #ashton irwin #ashton blurb #5sos #galcal irwin

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