#but I do think it’s important to cut back on chemicals and processed things as much as possible!

[larcenywrites]

How would young!Tony and older Tony react upon finding you curled up in a little ball in bed whimpering and crying because your period cramps hurt so fucking bad :(?

He would would be very concerned, and with good reason. He may not know much, but nothing should hurt that bad unless it requires a doctor or something, surely 😣 and may try to recommend it, though that doesn’t exactly help right now :/ tbh he’ll definitely cuddle up to you, and will probably want to just lay on top of you if you let him 🥺 he doesn’t know if it’ll help, but he is warm and cuddly and heavy so maybe it does a little 🥺 and he’ll play with your hair or wipe away/kiss the tears on your cheeks :( he’ll probably also do a lot of research on his own to see if he can do anything! But it’s kinda hard when you don’t know exactly how it feels :( so he may feel a little shorty and useless bc if it :((

But real talk rq, it’s normal to have annoying cramping a day or two of your period, but super bad cramps (especially consistently) is not, especially if it’s also accompanied by a really heavy and/or irregular flow! I recommended starting on a vitamin D supplement + an Omega-3 (provided you are not on any blood thinners, as omega supplements can interact negatively). Of course, I can’t recommend a dosage, as that depends on many different variables like age and weight and what not, so always do research! It is always smart to talk to a trusted doctor or medical provider about awful period symptoms if available, but often times they wanna prescribe birth control first, which is fine if you’re comfortable with it and believe that it’s right for you, and also be sure to do your research on it as well as talk with the doctor! But if BC isn’t an option, many of my friends that I have recommend those supplements to have seen improvements :) though, consistence is key, and it may take 4-6 weeks to start working. I would also recommend finding a good Women’s multi vitamin (I like Garden of Life’s Multivitamin Code:Women, it says 4 a day but I take 2!) as they are created with plenty of zinc and B vitamins, which greatly nourishes the ovaries and zinc may also help suppress ovarian cyst development. I also recommend Peruvian red maca root (make sure it’s Peruvian and not the weaker Chinese version, and make sure it’s the red. I use The Maca Team company, via their website, and take 3 raw capsules a day), provided you don’t have any thyroid issues or sensitivities, but again, always be sure to do your own research and/or talk with a medical provider, and to talk with them if you have any medications or medical conditions. Maca root may be too expensive, however (especially when you’re buying it with other supplements), and multivitamins (especially the brand I use) and omega-3s can also get pricey depending on your dosage and preferred brands and where you live, but Vitamin D is often cheap and easily available, and is the best place to start, as it greatly benefits every part of the body! Another great habit to get into is making sure to work avocado, blueberries/strawberries/raspberries, spinach, and/or sweet potato into at least one meal a day, as those are considered superfoods as well as hormone balancing foods! Chicken, eggs, turkey, and low mercury fish are also very good for that, provided you are able to eat meat. Frozen and canned works just as good, as long as they don’t have too much sodium or added sugar! However, I am aware that this can be an expensive option, especially if buying with supplements. If you’ve had your blood work recently and know that the issue isn’t low levels of any vitamins or minerals, be sure to talk with the doctor, as there are some cases where BC is really your only option, but that doesn’t mean you have to take it of course. It just depends on your level of comfort with your period or with taking BC, if anything at all seems to help in any way (such as Tylenol, heat pads, etc), and whether or not you have any specific medications or known medical conditions. I also recommend non-carbonated kombucha for the bloating (among other things) 😘 provided you don’t have IBS or similar digestive distress issues, and aren’t sensitive to oxalates (in particular, getting kidney stones due to high oxalate levels). But if you’re a first timer, don’t drink more than like half a measuring cup or a single measuring cup, and don’t drink it really fast 😅 And keep in mind that while it is vegan and gluten free, there are low but existing alcohol levels, should that be an issue! And no, not enough to require an ID or to get drunk lol. Again, if you have any medications or medical conditions, always be sure to do research and/or talk with your medical care provider! And overall, be sure to stay hydrated on your period (and all the time really)! It can help with headaches and cramps, and is overall important.

I hope everyone here is 18+, but in case you aren’t, you should definitely ask a doctor before following any of this advice and also do research. Also, often times periods are most painful within the first 3-5 years of getting it, as hormones are new and constantly changing with a growing body. I also recommend you not be on this blog if this is the case 😅

I was once in a rough spot with horrible cramps to where I’d was crying or on a few occasions sick and a very heavy flow, and absent periods for up to 80 days even. It’s unfortunate how little info or care is provided to us, even by doctors :( I suffered for years until I kinda just started doing my own research and it took a good few years to get into a good spot and figure out what I needed and what I didn’t. I wish you all good health and hope you can all find the best routine and supplementation for your bodies and cycles :)

#anon #anonymous #answered #larstalks #sorry for the rant I’m a health food freak #I used to have horrible period pain until I figured out what my body needed #and so I hate to see others go through it when there may be a way to fix it :( #especially if it can be fixed a little more naturally than medications #and no I’m not some all natural freak dw I believe in meds and vaccines and all aspects of women’s health care 😭 #but I do think it’s important to cut back on chemicals and processed things as much as possible!

[raineydays411]

My fathers daughter pt 12

It all comes out sometime

"Jay?" You ask.

"Yeah its me. How the fuck did you get access to the coms?" He asks amused at your actions.

"Trust me hacking this isn't any harder than hydra files" You say passively, " Anyways that's not important, I think I can help with this Joker thing."

"Wait? Really?" He ask seriously, "Y/n, listen carefully, I need you to go into Bruce's office and find the big ass clock --"

"Yeah I already found the secret hide out" You say annoyed, "Mommy dearest kicked me out before I could tell her how I could help."

Jason sighed, knowing that his mother probably tried to use her mom voice on you. " Yeah, she told us she didn't want you to be in the whole vigilante think."

The anger that was simmering under your skin came back, but before you let it get the best of you, you continued. Knowing that this information was more important than whatever mommy issues you had.

"Right, well that's not important." You say," Listen to me now."

"I'm listening." Jason grunted, sounding like was punching someone,

"Whatever chemical agent Jackass put in his venom is the exact same stuff that was used to brainwash the Winter Soldier" You say quickly.

"Kid, I wanna believe you but how do you know that? Tim was just able to get a sample and process it."

"Because, I was told that every antidote you use only makes the effects stronger right?"

"Right" He says strained

"In order to make sure that the Winter Soldier stayed the Winter Soldier and not Bucky, Hydra had to make sure his brain produced a certain amount of hormones. And that whatever anybody used, the effects couldn't reverse. Hence chemical X."

"Chemical X?"

"The name is to long for me to attempt to pronounce, anyways, lucky for us, my daddy just so happened to create a serum that undoes Chemical X. And if I check," You pause, taking over the computer downstairs, and checking the sample Tim had sent in, " The component is there."

"Well I'll be damned"

"Exactly. Now, I need you to find a lab or something. This serum was made with the intention of being made on the fly. So everything you need should be there." You say pulling up a map of Gotham general.

"Wait, I need to tell Bruce." Jason said, " Joker said he had the only antidote and he's fighting him right now"

"No thats not possible. The only ones who know about it is my father and I." You said worridly.

Meanwhile while you were upstair lending a helping hand, downstairs Christine and Alfred were panicking because they lost control of Jason's com and the main computer.

'Alfred I can't find him" Christinen cried, " How did he just disappear like that?

"I don't know miss, there's no possible way he could've."

"Wait." Christine says looking up to the screen, " Bruce and Tim are gone"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"How did you get con-"

"It's not important" You say cutting Batman off, " Listen to me, Joker doesn't have the cure."

"How do you know that?" The dark knight asks skeptically

"Because, until my dad figured it out, there was no cure." You say impatiently, " This chemical wasn't intended to have a cure."

"But you figured it out?"

"YES" You shout frustrated at the constant repetition, " DO you want the step by step or do you want to save lives?"

"hm" Bruce grunted, " And you know how to make it?"

"I do." You say earnestly

There was a pause, you heard grunting and what sounded like fighting in the background.

On Bruce's side, he managed to get the Joker disarmed and tied up.

He searched him for what he claimed was the vial containing the cure. But upon finding it, the Joker decided to throw his head back connecting with Batman's face. The sudden impact caused him to drop the vial, shattering it on the linoleum floor. The liquid oozing out and burning a hole into the floor.

"Ooops" the Joker cackled, " Aww poor Batsy, I guess I may have told a little white lie"

As Bruce rose from the floor, Robin ran in holding another vial

"Batman, the antidote." He says with a stern look on his face.

The smug smile fell from the Jokers face as he looked at the preteen.

"Thats...that's not possible!" Joker cried out, " There is no cure. There was never a cure."

Batman looked Joker straight in the eye, " No Joker, it looks like you miscalculated."

And with that, a swift punch to the face knocked the Joker out. A breath of relief flowed from the Batfamily. Now they can focus on what really mattered, helping the infected.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back in your room you paced, after explaining how to make the cure, you hadn't hear back from the family. The anxiety you had building up in you made your heart feel as of it was going to explode.

"Y/n" Jasons voice came from your computer, " It worked."

You felt like crying, " Really? Are you for real?'

"No I'm lying and everyone died" Jason said sarcastically, " Yes I'm for real."

"Thank god" You said wetly

"Oh god are you crying?" Jason said uncomfortably

"No." and with that you disconnected, allowing access back to the main computer downstairs. After doing that you sat on your be, taking a couple deep breaths to calm yourself. But the tears kept flowing. You were so worried that you didn't get the information to Bruce on time. You were worried about the people that were exposed for too long. The ones that the antidote may not have worked on.

You may have been able to help a few but how many more could you have saved if you were listened to right away. The anger simmered back in your body.

You hated that Christine treated you as if you were a child. She completely disregarded what you had to say and took a shot at your father. At least he was smart enough to know that you were capable of more than just sitting and twiddle your thumbs.

You had half a mind to go down there and give her a piece of you mind. But before you could, a chime came from your phone

"Hey Starky! guess who's on the neighborhood <3"

Wade?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the time the Batman co. finally made it back to the cave they all were exhausted. Every single one of them wanted to get home and take a shower. Dick and Jason would be staying at the manor simply because they couldn't muster up the energy to make their respective journeys back home. Damian and Cass were knocked out in the back of the batmobile and even Bruce was having a hard time staying awake while driving.

Honestly, ever since his family was created, Bruce/Batman became less about vengeance and more about protecting the city that he and his family live and care about. And maybe, if there was anyway that he can help mend the relationship between your family and his, perhaps you can be a part of his team as well, as sad at it was to say your hacking skills were way above his and Tims.

Lost in thought, Bruce didn't realized that when he pulled in Christine was in borderline hysterics and Alfred looked a little more frazzled than usual.

"Oh! Bruce!", Christine cried throwing herself into the confused bat, " What happened?! Is everyone one okay?"

"Christine, darling what are you-" Bruce was puzzled, Christine always had somewhat of a flair for the dramatics but there should be no reason for her to be this worried, especially because she's able to see everything .

"I thought we lost you! All of you!" Christine cried, eyes welling up with tears," The coms cut our for what felt like hours and then the main computer crashed! Me and Alfred both were barely able to get it rebooted before you got here!"

"Wait, if the main computer crashed then how was Y/n able to talk to us through the coms?" Tim asked tiredly, only jolting awake when Jason harshly elbowed him, signaling him to shut up about your participation.

"What do you mean? Y/n has been in her room this whole time." Christine says with a look of confusion on her face.

The batfamily all looked at each other, silently daring each other to step up and tell the truth, and face the wrath of their mother. Even Bruce didn't want to rat you out, knowing where Christine stood on her thoughts of you being involved.

Now don't get the wrong idea, Christine is by definition an overprotective mother. Theres no doubt about that. But there is a reason as to why she wants you out of the hero life and spot life in general.

Firstly, you are Tony Stark's daughter. There is no getting around that. And being Tony Stark's daughter also means you're Iron Mans daughter. And that is the whole reason you are there in Gotham in the first place. Amidst all the familial drama, everybody seemed to forget that you are still being hunted by an anonymous group. But Christine hasn't. Every night she lies awake worried to death that that was the night they found you. That they would come for you.

Secondly, the villians that her husband and family deal with are...for lack of words psychoic. If they figured out that you, Iron mans daughter, was helping their enemy Batman there would be more people after you. And from what Christine has witnessed these people do, the horrors and atrocities they casually commit. That frightens her even more.

So, with that being said, the look on her families face and the circumstances that had just occurred, it wasn't hard for her to figure out the cause of their technical malfunctions. And what a coincidence that these malfunctions only happened after you were sent to your room.

"Bruce.", Christine said in a clam even tone, " What are you not telling me." She didn't ask she demanded.

"Darling." Bruce said in a pleading tone, " It was a long night for everybody, why don't we just discuss it in the morning"

"Discuss it in the morning?" Christine asked incredulously, " Discuss it in the morning?! Do you know how worried I was? How worried WE were" She gestures to herself and Alfred who looked mildly uncomfortable to be put in the argument, " We thought you were injured or worse DEAD!"

The kids tried to slowly back out, inching towards the elevator that you totally didn't know was there.

"Don't even think about it" Christine said without looking at them, " How dare you all? How dare you? I asked ALL of you for one simple thing. Just one. To keep her OUT of it."

"Christine that's hardly fair-" Bruce started to say before getting cut off.

"No! It is totally fair! There are PEOPLE after her. People who are still out there by the way! Tony and his team haven't been able to find them! They keep slipping away whenever they get close! They are out there, trying to get MY daughter, for god knows what!"

Bruce glances towards the staircase entrance but before he can say anything Christine goes on, " DO you understand how hard it has been to keep anything from this world from her!"

"Ma she grew up in this world, it's not fair to just cut her out" Jason cuts in, " She feels left out because we're all pretending like we aren't who we are and pretending as of we don't have The Tony Starks daughter in our house. She's not a civilian, she's in it."

"She is not just Tonys daughter she's mine too!" Christine shouts before tears start to drop from her eyes, " Shes MINE, she can't be taken from me."

In the batmobile, Cass buries her face into a sleeping Damians chest.

"Mom, do you think any of us would let that happen?" Dick finally speaks up, " I mean, come on have a little faith"

" I just wanted her to stay out of it, to get out for good."

" Darling, that girl was not made to stay out of things, look at whp her parents are," Bruce chuckled, " Besides, she's never going to come around if we don't fully open ourselves up to her as well."

"You have to admit Ma, fighting is the only way any of us bonded" Jason says, " Except me, she likes me."

"I don't know why " Dick says with a frown, still bitter at the fact that you had bonded with Jason before him.

Christine sniffled before saying, " I still need to go talk to her, the way she cut us off was unacceptable."

"But-" Tim finally spoke out but it was too late, Christine was already marching to the elevator, mind made up about scolding you for what she thought was a practical joke.

The rest of the team was left in the Bat cave shaking their heads at their mothers stubbornness.

Bruce's sighed and started to put things away, " There's going to be fight and I don't want to be in the middle of that."

The three awake boys nodded.

" Someone wake up Damian and Cass, they need to go to bed."

Jason and Dick pushed Tim forward, if there was one other thing they didn't want to get in the middle of, was those two and their sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back upstairs you were filled to the brim with anger. You had gone downstairs to greet the returning heroes and rub your success in Christines face, only to overhear what you had already confirmed.

Christine had been purposefully keeping things from you. Not only about Bruce being Batman ( Which you already knew), but about your situation.

See, when you had first moved to Gotham, you knew that there would be almost little to no contact with your family. The few times you were able to talk to someone from back home it wasn't even your parents. Something about phone lines being traceable and unreliable.

The only line of communication was given to you by Natasha before you left, a single flip burner phone that was only to be used for emergencies.

But Christine apparently was getting updates directly from your father. Updates you were sure were meant to be given to you. So not only had she had a hand in the intentional isolation of you from her family, she was trying to isolate you from yours as well.

It made you so angry! You already have sacrificed so much just to be here and you didn't even want to be there in the first place. You ripped open your laptop and went to do a little digging. Upon doing that, you found about a dozen of lengthy emails from your father describing in great lengths about your situation and details about life back home. These emails were obviously meant to be read by you and they all were marked as read and filed away. How they got to the Batcomputer was unknown to you but as you scanned each word tears welled up into your eyes, you father had not forgot about you.

You sat on the bed, taking deep breaths trying to calm down. You managed to restrain yourself and not blow up at that woman in front of her whole family and you really were trying to calm down so you can have a mature conversation about it.

You were trying.

but then, "Y/n Stark how dare you disobey your mother!"

What?

"What?" You say eyes ripping open and anger finally bubbling over

"How dare you! I asked you for one thing! All I wanted was to make sure my family would have been okay!"

"And are they dead?" You ask bluntly, " Is everyone who was infected dead?"

Christine turned red, " That is not the point young lady and I don't appreciate you talking about your family like that."

"They are NOT my family!" You shout, " You are not my family"

'Y/n" Christine start but now you were the one to cut her off

"NO, and since we are on the topic of not appreciating things lets talk about how I don't appreciate how you have been deliberately LYING to me."

"Excuse me?" Christine asks angrily, " I will have you know that I do not have to disclose every single piece of information I have to yo."

" Not even when it's about my own father." You said with an even tone, " Or do you not have to disclose that piece of information to me."

Christine lifts her chine, " Y/n I have no idea what you are talking about?"

"Oh you don't?" You ask," So you and your husband aren't hiding emails from my father to me in that big ass computer?"

Eyes widen, " How do you -"

"How do I know about that?" You mock, " So it's true?"

"Y/n that's not the point" Christine started, " Your practical joke could have seriously put the lives of your siblings in danger."

" My siblings?" You ask, " They are not my siblings! I don't even know those people!"

Christine stays quiet, then shakes her head, " If you would just come out of the room and get to know them other than Jason-"

"Why so they could tell me how great you are?' You say, " So they can tell me memories they have of you being a good mother to them?"

Christine's eyes well up with tears, " Y/n that's not fair"

"Oh that not fair to you, mom?" you shout, " And it was so fair to me when you left me to raise another kid?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the hallway Dick and Jason are paused half way up the staircase.

Dicks heart falls into his stomach at your comment, knowing that that kid you were talking about was him.

Jason on the other hand had a grim look on his face. He knew that this conversation needed to happen in order for anything to move on.He knew the years of resentment you were holding on to. It wasn't fair to you that everyone in this house had this subconscious expectation that you should just put those years behind you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"That is not what happened" Christine says wetly, " It was just hard, Y/n you don't understand."

"Hard?!" You shout angerliy, " It was hard? Hard for you to visit your daughter once every three fucking months? Was it hard for you to lead my dad on then crush his heart every time you left?"

"NO Y/N thats not true" Christine shouted but before she could continue you went on

"No???" you mocked, " Then what was it mom?"

" Everytime I went to see you, you had grown." Christine sniffs, " You had grown and had new adventures and stories and milestones that i was not a part of. I-"

"OH bullshit!" You shout

"Y/n." Christine says sadly

"NO, no you don't get to play that card! You left by choice!" You cry, " You left me by choice, you hid me away by choice! You chose this life for us."

" I loved you so much. I LOVE you so much Y/n!"

"You have a funny way of showing it." You say dryly, " You have this perfect life here. Perfect husband, a shit load of kids who adore you. I adored you. Why wasn't I enough?"

Christine's heartbroke and she couldn't answer you because truthfully, she didn't have an answer.

"And the one parent I was enough for I had to leave. I had to leave him and my mother behind for my other one who didn't want me. And I'm stuck in a house full of these kids who adore you and didn't know that I adored you well before them. And yet even though I'm here I'm alone. And that still isn't enough for you."

Christine wanted to say you weren't alone. You weren't because you have her. She's here for you, but that wasn't true. She hadn't been there. She wasn't there even when she was.

"You had to make me think my father forgot about me the way you did for what? So I can like you again? So I could forget all the times you promised you were going to come see me and you didn't? Why?"

"I..I just wanted to keep you safe.." Christine spouted pathetically.

"Safe?" You said, herding her towards your door, " No, everything you've done is because you want to look better. You're selfish. That's what you've always been"

And with that you slam the door in her face, startling the boys on the stairs and Christine as she didn't even realize that she was in the hallway.

Staring at your door she wept. For once, truly feeling the regret that she said she had been feeling. She did truly love you, she had not lied about that. To hear you finally say how you weren't enough for her broke her heart.

"Ma..are you okay?" Jason softly asked as Dick went to knock at your door, a bit angry at the way you spoke to his mother,

"Leave her be." A soft voice demanded from the hallway, " Dick, leave her be. Your mother was not the only one hurt in that conversation."

Bruce walked to Christine, and gently lead her to their room.

Upon the commotion outside, no one heard you open your window and slip out.

"It's about time, I almost died waiting for you."

"You can't die, that's your whole thing." You reply, wiping tears from your face.

"You're crying." Wade says in an unnaturally serious voice, " Do I have to kill your hot mom?"

You cringe, " No, just get me out of here."

"I could do that, actually I have a surprise for you~" He sings as he leads you to his taxi...

You heard what sounds like banging coming from the trunk and you're slightly scared to open it.

"Wade.."

"Oh don't be a pussy" He says opening the trunk.

Popping out with a gasp is

"Peter?" You say with a sigh, eyes welling up with tears again. You truly have missed your friends.

"That was not cool Wade!" He shouts, not grasping where he was, " The trunk smelled like nachos and vomit! I couldn't nngh-"

He grunts as you throw yourself into his arms, " Y/n.."

His arms wrap around you tightly, " Y/n what are you.. Where am I?"

"Gotham, now get me the hell out of here."

And with that, you're loaded into the car, taking the backseat with Peter and Wade in the front with an Indian man.

"Y/n this is Dopiender"

"Hello ms. Stark, I promise I will defend you with my life."

"Oh...well, thank you."

"This was surprisingly easy." Wade said as they pulled out of the long driveway, " Bruce Wayne should update his security."

What they didn't know, was that a pair of bright green eyes watched your reunion through the security camera in the Batcave. Squinting as they saw the tears flow freely through your face and noting the license plate and the men you were with.

#marvel x reader #avengers x teen!reader #marvel #reader insert #dc comics x reader #tony stark x daughter!reader #bruce wayne x daughter!reader #dick grayson x reader #jason todd x reader #x reader

[beanghostprincess]

Usopp's self care is taking care of his hair. He makes a whole day of it, he starts the day early dividing his hair into parts and cutting his ends. washing and detailing takes a long time after it deep conditioning and then hot oil treatment.

It's a very long tedious but very rewarding process. Some of his fondest memories with his dad was when he was doing his hair. Yasopp said to keep his hair virgin don't dye it, don't straighten it, and don't bleach or relax it! Especially the last two he did that now his hair has broken off the curls are gone and his roots are gray. It took him 7 years for it to grow back to its natural length and that's because he had to locs it so he won't mess with it.

Looking at old photos of his dad's hair and his hair now he's scared straight. He's not going near any sort of chemicals His hair is going to be natural forever. He wished he taught him how to braid/twist/loc his own hair, he had to teach himself. When they do meet up with the red pirates his dad's hair looks a lot better. It's not a deep black like usopp's It's more of a dark gray now but the curls are back and it's not brittle anymore.

During their visit Yasopp spent hours sitting with usopp on the floor locking his hair and teaching him how to do it and take care of it. The first hour was awkward and quiet but after the third hour It was like they never separated talking and laughing. The topic of sanji (of course sanuso is involved) was brought up and if he knows how to do his hair.

After a shameful 'no' he found Saji in the kitchen spying on them (he was there the whole time for 4 hours watching them) He was yelled at for not knowing how to do his life partner's hair.

'How do you not know how to do that!? Don't you know how intimate it is to have your partner take care of your hair! it's the easiest way to show affection! You hasn't been doing that?! What if you have kids!? How are you going to do their hair?! Sit down! Where's that weird flamboyant skeleton?! You're gonna learn how to do textured hair today!'

I. Absolutely. Love this.

Usopp using his hair as something he has in common with his dad is so, so sweet. He just loves it so much. He loves taking care of it and he loves following all the things his dad taught him, so when they meet again, he can proudly say he followed his steps. He thinks about his parents whenever he's taking care of his hair, and it's just so important to him. It's his favorite part of himself 100%. He might be insecure, but about his hair? Never.

He is, though, a bit reluctant to asking Sanji if he wants to learn about it. Sanji, being the clingy boyfriend he is, loves Usopp's hair. He won't stop touching it and complimenting it and Usopp easily falls asleep when Sanji does these things because it's relaxing and extremely soothing and sweet. However, Sanji is careful not to be disrespectful or cross any boundaries so he's always "your hair looks gorgeous like always, mon trésor" and a few strokes and kisses to his head, but that's about it. He doesn't push further or ask anything because he thinks it's an Usopp thing and he knows how important his hair is for him. He watches Usopp's hair routines whenever they shower together (most of the time) and pretty much keeps an eye on him whenever they go to sleep and Usopp has to do his things. It's not that he doesn't want to learn, he really does, it's just that he doesn't want to push Usopp to do something he doesn't want to. Classic miscommunication situation, because Usopp just thinks Sanji isn't inetersted and he doesn't want to be a burden and he's just fine with it.

Yasopp is not fine with it, though. So the second he finds out about Sanji not knowing a thing about taking care of his son's hair, Yasopp calls out for him (he knows Sanji has been listening. He's no idiot. Father senses) and forces him to learn how to do textured hair. Which is funny because Yasopp thinks he's forcing it on him and that he's being oh so scary and father like, but, uh, Sanji really does want to learn. He truly is excited for this! They do some lessons with Brook (who's really, really happy to help) and Usopp looks at them with such a fond look,,, He just loves his boy so much.

Then they have to say goodbye to the Red Hair pirates, sadly (sadly for Usopp and Luffy because I am 100% sure Nami is SO done with these guys already). Something changes, because now Sanji offers to do his hair when they have the time and before and after going to sleep. He now knows how to take care of it, at least, there wasn't much time for a long explanation about styling. So Usopp teaches him what he doesn't know and asks all the questions Sanji has, even if they seem dumb at first.

Usopp's favorite part of himself is his hair, and apparently Sanji loves it just as much <3

#THIS WAS SO CUTE GONNA KISS YOU ANON #this was great 100% love this so much #usopp's hair >>>>>>> #my fav thing pretty boy #one piece #black leg sanji #usopp #sanuso

[sanctus-ingenium]

answering your asks vol 3

Full context for the Inprnt issue can be found here on this post , tl;dr my shop is closed until I receive my payments from inprnt in a timely manner and essentially won't reopen unless they clean up their act. Regarding the money they owe me outlined in that post, I still have not received it and on Friday I sent a support ticket in to inprnt demanding they send it soon. Haven't heard back since. I think where Inprnt is concerned, it's worth mentioning that they no longer send promotional emails (which used to be a regular occurrence) and there seems to be a complete lack of communication and the only thing about the site that regularly updates is the sale banner (ending soon!!! 🙄)

So honestly I'm of the opinion that the print on demand bubble has burst and that this method of selling art was a very short-lived feature of an internet that doesn't exist anymore. Think about it - I make money on a sale after having spent nothing on promotion, on materials, on postage fees, etc. It's so easy to game the system using bots or stolen art to essentially print free money that I'm shocked it even lasted as long as it did. Maybe I'm wrong but I won't tie myself to another print on demand service that's just going to pull the same old shit redbubble and inprnt have done this year, or one that requires me to constantly promo it like some kind of influencer on instagram or tiktok or whatever.

Will prints come back? I hope so. I am looking into local printing shops and considering the feasibility of handling the process myself but you must understand that if I do that, the price will rise. I won't have the ability to run constant discounts or eat a loss if I order 20 prints and only 7 sell. It is what it is.

And the actual worldbuilding asks below the cut lol:

(referring to this post)

Only if you want to! I've had a few people send me cool sketches and stuff via dms and it's always nice to see but you really shouldn't feel pressured to. After all it's not like I post my rough practice here lol (that goes on patreon ;)

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I'm going to be SO real with you right now - I did not consider that at all. However I do know that tinting flames with various chemical compounds was a huge part of alchemy, part of the whole flashy show of it to impress the layperson. So sure, I bet they do throw in copper sulfate or various other chemicals to produce the coloured flames - these make a huge impression on witnesses who might not even have imagined such a thing possible, and also help identify a holy beast at a distance on a battlefield choked with smoke and dive-bombing serpents.

Fun fact, the flames come from the furnace wells, right. Each well is connected to specific systems, where it can most efficiently deliver fuel to the heart and onwards. So it is possible to 'read' the pattern of flame bursts from the furnace slits - they are not constant, but there'll be one every few seconds based on when the furnace tenders excite each well. You can tell at a distance, for example, that Leun is readying an acid spray, or rerouting power to the rear legs for a leap, or even what direction he's turning. It all runs at a slight delay, which is why the crew inside has to be SO closely coordinated.

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@absolutely-flabbergasted Knights are allowed to reproduce but not marry, because it's sort of accepted theory that blood relatives of a knight will be 'accepted' by the knight's beast when the time comes. This is not true but it means that sometimes the knight's apprentices are their own children. The other parent is mostly another member of the church and usually not identified or considered important (unless they're a smith...). There are usually a decent number of known knight bastards running about.

Smiths are not allowed to have families or marry, because their first devotion should be to their art or their beast if they are assigned to one. If one tries, the kids are taken away, anonymised with new names, and put into the pool of potential novices in some other stable. Now, in reality some stables or churches are just not that strict and have a slightly different culture, so there's often an Open Secret about some master smith's illegitimate family or a priest's secret mistress. This is tolerated by the authorities to a certain degree but if it becomes too rampant there'll usually be a change of management and some sort of crackdown.

Families who give up their second born cannot stay in contact, but if the child becomes successful in some way (say, if the child becomes a knight) the families are sent tokens symbolising this which can be placed in the family/village shrine. This can be a huge point of pride, with some people faking the tokens just so that they can show off about their successful kids that are totally knight apprentices.

The reason they don't get to stay in touch with their children is due to the secretive nature of the church and its arts. The church has been at war with the neighbouring nations for a long time and only its mastery of engine work has kept it afloat, and nobody wants these secrets to fall into enemy hands. Particularly if your kid goes on to become a scribe, which is if anything an even more closely guarded profession than that of a knight (those engine diagrams don't draw themselves). The laity are usually quite devout and understanding of this. If they aren't, they might attempt to find their child, often without success.

If you want your church kid back: it depends. If you can prove to the church authorities that you need your child's labour to stay afloat or to carry on the family line, they might take that into consideration. Of course, the only children that return are the likes of sweepers, cleaners, altar boys, pages, etc. Nobody who might have witnessed any Secrets. The church is best understood as being in the middle of a cold war for the past few centuries (and sometimes just regular war) so it's far more closely guarded.

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@kicks-tiktaalik-back-into-water

It's not likely. Even if the ventilation system worked perfectly, he is still from an older generation of holy beasts and no longer represents the pinnacle of the technology. Leun might have a less sophisticated ventilation system but everything else about him is head and shoulders more advanced - including the crew number he can take on. Leun only requires a single enginesmith in the heart, for example. This is because there's more automation of his systems, and he can actually manage to walk home from battle without anybody inside at all, just based on the knight's input (because the throne chamber is open to the air the knights are technically not inside the beasts). It's not preferable (it can damage the systems) but it is a huge bonus.

Think about how in the early days of commercial aviation, there could be as many as eight people working on the flight deck. In the 60s, a 3-person crew was standard; captain, first officer, and flight engineer. Today there are only two pilots needed. This is down to increased automation, and it means that it is cheaper to fly the plane - the airline has to hire fewer pilots, 'flight engineer' is a nonexistent role these days, and that means you need to train fewer people, have fewer people on call, feed fewer people etc etc. It is cheaper for the church to run Leun than it is to run Krokodilos and even though the church is wealthy, the money and resources are not infinite. Especially now, in times of plague. Leun, for all everybody sings his praises, is basically a reskinned Pantera with better systems - again, cutting costs, because now we can get all of Pantera's old enginesmiths to work on him instead of having to train up new ones on a brand new and wholly unique platform. It's as much a matter of logistics as it is innovation and technology.

#info asks #setting: mez #fun asks this time round .. thank you everyone <3

[hindahoney]

Do you have any tips for eating kosher food when it's not easily available to you? It's slightly easier cause I don't eat meat but its very hard and I'd like help

To anyone who wants to eat kosher, my most important advice is to start slow. It's a process. If you cut out everything at once you will get overwhelmed and quit.

My first advice is to only eat things with a hechsher on it. Because you don't eat meat, it's already significantly easier for you. The problem is finding dairy with a hechsher, especially cheese. A lot of cheeses are made with rennet, which is a part of the animal we are forbidden to eat. This is why a lot of cheese chips and snacks aren't kosher, even if they seem like they should be (doritos were SO hard to let go of for me, and I'll never forgive Sunchips for removing their hechsher). A lot of foods also have non kosher dyes that were made with insect shells, the same with sodas. Additionally, checking produce for any bugs is always a good idea!!! Even produce in grocery chains are likely to contain little bugs. I promise once you start checking, you'll see them. So many products are full of chemicals that were created with non-kosher ingredients or in non-kosher facilities, so the best way to ensure you're not accidentally consuming them is to just eat hechsher products.

For people who do eat meat, however, you can still eat most fish because it's considered pareve. Chicken used to be in this category, though this was changed over time by rabbis who noticed that people began thinking of chicken as meat. The argument proposed is that the Torah says "Thou shall not boil a kid in its mother's milk," and since chickens don't produce milk, this prohibition does not apply. Rabbis would say that the spirit of the law means it does. It is up to you whether you want to agree with the rabbis about this. For me, when I first started keeping kosher, I would allow myself to eat chicken, before I slowly removed it from my diet to abide by the rabbinical ruling. I also think the spirit of the law should apply to eating eggs and chicken (though eggs are pareve) together, if we are prohibiting eating an animal with its potential child. But I'm not aware of any rabbis who have said this (but jews talk about everything so they're probably out there.)

Eating meat or cheese plant-based hechshered substitutes are also acceptable, depending on your movement. For me personally, I will eat hechshered meat substitutes, and this satiates my cravings for meat until I can get kosher meat. Gardein is a good brand, and so is Morning Star, and I'm sure other countries have their own brands. The argument against eating meat substitutes was that the appearance of an observant jew eating what looks to be a cheeseburger could cause other observant Jews to believe the laws around kashrut have changed, leading them to break kosher. This law made more sense back then, but now I'm not so convinced, but that's up to you to decide. Eventually, I see myself no longer eating meat substitutes once I live in an area with a kosher market, but for now this has to do.

Work your way up to waiting between meat and milk. The time varies, I've heard anything from one to eight hours.

Make sure to crack your eggs in a separate clear container to check for blood. It's not common, but it happens.

Eating vegan or vegetarian while you're out is a decent compromise in the beginning until you feel ready to let go of restaurants.

Lastly, have a little non-kosher food send off. Before you start your journey, eat your favorite non kosher food and then say goodbye to it forever, at least until you can find a way to make it kosher. Eating kosher is hard. But it's a reminder of the covenant between yourself and HaShem. When you eat kosher foods, the belief is that whatever animal was used in the making has now served a higher purpose.

If anyone else has tips on how to start keeping kosher, or ways that help you, feel free to share!

#jumblr #judaism #jewish #frumblr #ask #long post #im sure i left things out #the post was already long i didnt get to talk about the kosher kitchen part #thats a whole other thing #kosher #jewish conversion

[sustainabilitythoughts]

What is sustainability?

After I wrote a post about getting started with sustainability actions, I started thinking about what sustainability means.  We hear the word a lot but how much do we know about what sustainability really means?  I looked at some definitions and thought about what I know about our planet.  Here’s what I think sustainability means. 

One article used the phrase “healthy planet”.  In the biggest sense, sustainability means that individuals, corporations, and governments make choices that support a healthy planet.  A healthy planet is one where all of the creatures (including people) and plants can live healthy lives in a habitat that supports them, for many millennia into the future.  Based on this definition, we have a long way to go to reach sustainability.  We are using irreplaceable resources at an alarming rate, polluting the planet, quickly losing biodiversity and habitat, and changing our climate.  And there is no Planet B.  I am not suggesting that everyone needs to cut back to using only enough resources to barely remain alive, because there is more to life than just existing.  However, if we make lifestyle changes where we can, it will make a difference.  Each of us needs to evaluate our own situation - what aspects of our lifestyle are most important to us and what aspects we can change.  Start your sustainability lifestyle changes using baby steps so the effort is not overwhelming.  Here is a more detailed list of aspects I would include in addressing sustainability.  The list seems overwhelming, but don’t let that stop you from taking baby steps.  I’ll write more on each of these topics as time goes by. 

Disposable items:  While many of us think of obvious items such as plastic straws, our disposable culture includes much more.  Items that are discarded instead of being repaired, reused, or recycled may be considered disposable.  Anything that goes into a landfill is actually a disposable item.  Items designed so they cannot be repaired are disposable even if you keep them for a few years. 

Biodiversity: The earth has many millions of living things with a wide variety of types and needs. All species of plants and other living creatures, including human beings, are intricately linked by their interactions with each other and the environments they live in.  Taking away or modifying habitat or the “residents” of that habitat has an effect on every other living thing in that habitat.  Healthy habitats and residents are essential for a healthy planet.  Threats to biodiversity include monoculture (large areas with only one type of plant), invasive species, and loss of habitat through human activities. 

Consumption: Manufacturing and transporting all the items we buy takes resources and energy.  Managing these items after we discard them also takes resources and energy, and some items create greenhouse gases as they decompose in landfills. 

Energy: Energy requires resources for production and use.  Even renewable energy sources require resources to manufacture and then dispose of the components.  Some forms of energy production generate greenhouse gases. 

Greenhouse gas emissions: These emissions are changing the earth’s climate.  There are many greenhouse gases, and some (methane, for example) are much more effective at increasing global temperatures than carbon dioxide.  Freon is not only a very powerful greenhouse gas but also destroys a high-altitude ozone later that protects the earth from some of the sun’s harmful radiation.

Pollution: Tens of thousands of different chemicals are put into the air and water every day and can cause significant problems.  The list includes simple things like air fresheners and complex things such as chemicals discharged into the air and water during a manufacturing process.

#sustainability #environment #environmental

[yourtoradorasextendedwarranty]

Climate Manufacturing

So I've seen a lot of amazing posts on Climate Change and things alarmists have done to screw stuff up. Here is a video detailing the fact that this whole discussion is profit driven at its core.

And another reason to add to the pile of why I don't believe that 90% of young people need to be activists. Because they tend to be loud, abrasive, and they are the easiest group to manipulate in general. Anything you tell them with even superficial evidence and they just eat that shit up whole sail. They also are not a group that suffers legal consequences.

I take huge issue with that in general because it's a weaponization of the ignorant class. But here is a video detailing the fact that fossil fuels are a ethical to use until we go to a better source like Nuclear.

But I have to go into detail into this. And I'll use Texas as an example. When the huge winter storm happened Solar and Wind was useless. Not to mention, the material cost of solar and wind in general.

Never you mind the cost to people's freedoms. Which is another important detail we don't often look at. Solar panels take about 10-15 years to recoup the amount of emissions it took to make them. Wind is about this same though I think the high end on those is 20 years or more. And that's just for one. If you build 40 of those and it takes high end values to recoup all of that you are looking at 800 years.

So in our push for "Renewables" we are actually doing far more harm than good. Hell Germany CHEERED when they started getting rid of Nuclear. Except in doing so they started moving back to coal. Rather than natural gas which is more efficient and cleaner to use than coal.

If you can't see that there are people with vested interests in the world around you looking for a pay out, who legit do not care about the environment let me point you to this:

Trees of which, actually absorb CO2 emissions. So what I'm hearing is that we need to get rid of plantlife, specifically trees for the sake of "Climate Change". Biden in the US is trying to ban (or might have already) Incandescent light bulbs, gas burners, and is going after home generators next I believe that run on gas. All for "Climate Change".

Now here's the thing. I understand that Solar and Wind are not TERRIBLE. But they also kind of are. The wind does not always blow and the sun does not always shine. And with Battery technology at a near standstill, and the fact that Solar Panels are NON recyclable, with some of the cheaper end ones being actually pretty dangerous if they break at all because of the chemicals inside. Then you have the problem with wind farms that need MILES of trees cut down in order to make room for them. Meaning animal habitats are destroyed in the process, and they kill avian life as well.

I'm not saying climate change is not real. It clearly is. However the alarmism is meant to make you be afraid. That fear is profit for some company invested in coal, or renewables.

If you really want to make changes to the grid, start advocating for Nuclear. It's cleaner, lasts longer, is safer when managed correctly, and on top of that takes up less space in general. So long story short. If you see a person that's pushing "Renewables" over Nuclear, they are either ignorant, or they are lying to you. Might be time to actually start learning facts rather than being lied to, to fill someone else's wallet. Which IS what you are doing.

#climate change #discourse #Youtube

[agent-calivide]

Okay, so I see that @anticrazed has posted some of their IEYTD OC's, and I am taking that as the go ahead to lore dump the hell outta my and my friends OC's too, as well as the extended universe we've crafted for them.

Aaaand I have no clue how to do that "post is below the cut" thing, so I apologize for the text wall if this sends as a massive block of rambling

In this universe, the cast consists of Phoenix, Zor, Fabricator, Sans, Solaris, and a few OC's in modern times.

In a desperate attempt to live a few more years after getting a lethal illness, Zor put all of their top scientists to work on trying to find ways of creating immortality.

Solaris was the first, importing her mind into a computer (a la GlaDos from Portal) and still runs experiments to this day. Most who interact with Solaris think she's a computer program like Siri, very few know she's full blown sentient. She initially experimented with time dilation, but after a... mishap, she found it distasteful, and abandoned the method.

Then, there's Daniel Sans, who uses a combination of chemical compounds and super coolants to slow the aging process and sorta preserve himself (like a mixture of Mr. Freeze and Dr Muñoz from Cool Air ((aka bullshit science is bullshit)))

Last, was the Fabricator, who chose to take a more elegant approach to it all, using a combination of Botox and a serum to slow the aging process all together. She doesn't show many signs of growing older, and has a strict beauty routine to prevent any wrinkles from forming. As a side effect, however, she has to be very careful and avoid getting injured, as injuries take forever to heal. As such, she is wearing gloves 24/7, because her hands are constantly wrapped in bandage.

In the end, a mixture of these various solutions made Dr Zor functionally immortal, or at the very least made their illness obsolete. But in the background of all of this, there was a side project in the works.

Project Puerum. A project assigned to Solaris, and where the OC shenanigans begin.

Agent Cardinal/Operative C: Dr Zor's first successful clone, the cloning process being monitored by Dr Solaris in her free time between world-destruction projects. When C was born, she was nothing short of the perfect operative, intelligent, quick to learn, very malleable. Solaris and Fabricator were like surrogate mothers to her, and the Operatives all felt like older brothers and sisters. Even Sans, the stick in the mud that he was, grew to tolerate her presence. As time went on, C grew up to be Zoraxis' most formidable weapon, being a mole at the EOD in between operations, going by the name Cardinal. After all, Phoenix was an acceptable nickname, Cardinal sounded subtle enough that she wouldn't raise brows but distinct enough that she would be respected. But then, there was the accident. An incident that no one could possibly survive, as a time dilator that the EOD got from Dr Solaris' lab blew up, putting everyone in the room into a comatose state. Including C. Decades passed, Zoraxis mourned, and everyone moved on for the most part. But Solaris, Sans, and the Fabricator never fully moved on from their grief. When C woke up, she was just as young as the day the dilator glitched, having not aged a day, frozen in time. As she came to terms with being stuck in time, she only had one person from her past still with her. Agent Phoenix. Now a retired Handler, and an Agent she worked with when they were still young. Even though Phoenix had aged many years, they were the same spunky spitfire that they were in their early 20's, just as sassy as their handler was for them. C tried to go back to Zoraxis, but she was laughed at and damn near shot for the "cheap prank". And so, she was stuck at the EOD, and to this day Phoenix is her handler. She couldn't help but pick up some of their mannerisms, Fabricator's perfectionism fading as Phoenix taught her to go with the flow, Zor's ominous presence getting less visible in her attitudes as Phoenix slouched across the couch in her office and told her to "drop the boss speak" as they so eloquently put it, even her leaning towards violence faded as she was more exposed to alternate solutions than just killing people. It was.... nice, in a strange way. Her whole life had been laid out as some successor to someone she hardly talked to, but getting to be herself, to let her thoughts of rest be more than just thought, it was novel, wonderful even one might say. But she still misses and mourns her made up family, having accepted that the scientists likely all since passed. After all, Phoenix was hardly a spring chicken, and they were young when she got frozen in time. There was no way the others were still around...

Jade Juniper: A Zoraxis Operative who spends her days working on Zoraxis missions and performing as a world class singer to rake in cash for Zoraxis. Ever since the Peacekeeper, they haven't been able to fully come out of the shadows, so they depend on Operatives like Jade to rake in some extra money to fund their out of this world projects. Jade Juniper, as her name implies, is the daughter of John Juniper, her mother having died in childbirth. John treated Jade like a downright princess, spoiling her and giving her all the love and attention anyone could ask for. As he got into Zoraxis, he was blinded both by the power, and by the Zoraxis interworkings. Namely, the odd young girl, only a few years older than his own daughter. She always was attached to the hip of some scientist, and as such Jade's attention from John started slipping. He spent more and more time at work, at Zoraxis, and Jade was left to be raised by Gibson for a long while. Any time she tried to hop in, partake in the conversation, help her father with Zoraxis work to try and spend more time with him, she'd be silenced and told to go do something else. The more time went on, the more she heard all the adults talking about this girl. "C did her first mission" "C solved my traps in record time" "C seems to be warming up to me, can you imagine?" C. C. C. Everything was about this C. It was maddening, especially as her father's attention was pulled more and more by this other girl. And the group's reaction when she tried to step up and say she could do it- it was maddening! They all laughed, laughed! Jade was consumed by a bitter, simmering rage, but over time it slowly faded as her father spend more time with her. After all, they've almost made it! Just one more week, and then her father would be hers again.... John's death crushed her. She was told that the Phoenix killed him, some EOD agent that didn't want Zoraxis to take over, and didn't want Juniper to live after what he did. All that pain, all that anger and pent up frustration from years of begging for her dads attention all collapsed at once, and Jade was lost in bloodthirsty revenge. She swore she'd get vengeance on the EOD, no matter what. She got a dose of anti aging serum herself, similar to the Fabricator's, but more refined. More effective. She spent decades selling her soul to Zoraxis, and as she worked, the more she heard about C. If she thought C was irritating before, now she was enough to drive a person insane. Every accomplishment Jade achieved, C did it faster. Cleaner. Better. C was always better, C couldn't be beat! Jade couldn't help but feel a morbid joy as C was declared dead. Revenge would have been sweeter, but she could settle for karma. And so, Jade Juniper, with the stage name Sabrina Hendrix, rakes in money for Zoraxis by day, and by night is one of Zoraxis' most formidable operatives, driven by a need for revenge, and a desire to come out on top of everyone. Especially C.

Operative 4: A hitman for hire working for Zoraxis. Having grown up on the streets and willing to do damn near anything for money, it was appropriate that he ended up in the hands of the world's most evil empire. While blood on his hands kept him up at night, he didn't have much choice in the matter. Especially these days, as Zoraxis probably legally owned his soul at this point with how many contracts he signed just to get hired. 4 was always a bit disturbed... no, horrified by the things he had to do, but he was hired to do one job, and he refused to lose it over morals, even if he spent his nights watching the backs of his eyes. One day, his mission changed. He wasn't to kill someone, or even beat them to a bloody pulp. He was to follow a lead on an operative who disappeared several decades ago. Operative C. It was an odd project for sure, and a change of pace to boot, but he couldn't bring himself to be upset over the new gig. After all, he was looking for some old woman in her 60's. He could handle an old lady blindfolded... Except C wasn't old. Far from it. No, what should've been a woman in her 60's looked to be a teen, mid 20's at her latest. And she didn't seem to care about things like morals, or giving people dignified deaths. Suddenly he was much more nervous about this mission, and he found himself treating the agent like an explosive death trap.... Probably because she was one

These are just 3 of the 7 characters of our overarching story, but they're the main characters for lack of a better term. I honestly love the thought of writing a fic of them, but I feel like there'd be no interest in it, and flooding my tumblr with a bunch of OC's mayyy not be what everyone's signed up for. This is an IEYTD blog after all

#IEYTD #IEYTD2 #i expect you to die #i expect you to die 2 #john juniper #fabricator #Dr Zor #Daniel Sans #Solaris #Agent Phoenix #OC's #Agent Cardinal #Jade Juniper #Agent 4 OC

[mikeywayarchive]

Mikey Way interview with Tina Whelski for The Aquarian | Dec 29th 2010

Full interview under the cut

When your gut says destroy the album you just finished and start over, you should listen. That’s what My Chemical Romance decided on Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys (Reprise), the band’s fourth studio album and follow up to 2006’s critically acclaimed Black Parade.

After a grueling two-year Black Parade tour, My Chemical Romance realized that what they really missed was color. So in the 11th hour frontman Gerard Way, his brother, bassist Mikey Way, and guitarists Frank Iero and Ray Toro scrapped the album they mixed with producer Brendan O’Brien and ran with their instincts. They weren’t going to be the My Chemical Romance they had been. They would be the My Chemical Romance they had become. The band rejoined Black Parade producer Rob Cavallo and weeks later turned out an album they could stand by.

My Chemical Romance bassist Mikey Way explains how the band’s hunch paid off.

What’s the biggest difference between My Chemical Romance on Black Parade and the band on Danger Days?

I think we’re the most fearless that we’ve ever been. I also think it’s the album that’s most true to us. On previous albums we only showed maybe one or two sides of the band. I mean each album is dramatically different, but I think we looked a specific way and people had an idea what we sounded like. I think now more than ever we’re like a completely new My Chemical Romance and it’s kind of a My Chemical Romance that’s been there all along. We really feel super liberated and it feels like nothing’s holding us back.

The band changed course while recording Danger Days. When did you realize that you were creating something different than planned? 

When we got off the road for Black Parade we were all very tired and there were many successes and whatnot, but there were also things that we didn’t like about how it went. And there were things that we wanted to change. So we set up all these parameters for ourselves. When we went in to write the record we were like, “It’s going to be raw, stripped down, no costumes, no concept. Just a rock ‘n’ roll album. We’re going to do it real quick. Bam bam bam.” The result at the end wasn’t something we were ultimately happy with. It just sounded like something was missing. It was literally ready to go. We’d done photo shoots and we were scheduling shows and radio stations were going to start playing songs. Then at the 11th hour we all came to the mutual decision that something didn’t feel right. And we pulled the plug on it.

That’s a real leap of faith when everything’s stacked up.

Yeah, it’s like we learned more than ever on this album to go with our guts. If you’re feeling something then it’s probably true. We’ve kept that mantra through the whole process so we’re really very aware about how we’re all feeling about things. Going with our gut has become a very important thing.

Gerard has called this album “A big pop art project.” With characters like Dr. Death Defying and the post-apocalyptic world you paint, everything seems to live together, but you don’t consider this a concept album. Can you talk about what you imagined? 

Yeah, it’s kind of exactly that. It’s a giant pop art project. To call it just an album is, I think, selling it short. There are so many different aspects and layers to it. We really wanted to use art as a weapon and use pop music as a weapon. We wanted to express ourselves in a way we’ve never expressed ourselves before and dispel anybody’s preconceived notions of what a My Chemical Romance song could be. It’s not just guitar, drums, bass and vocals. There’s so much more to it than that. We wanted to really make songs that we’ve always dreamed of making. It’s kind of like we got ownership of the band back. We released the Black Parade and any kind of misunderstanding or negativity that came out of it I think has been rectified with this album.

It was fun to see Grant Morrison play the villain in the “Na Na Na” and “Sing” videos. 

It was so cool to finally get to work with him. He’s one of our best friends and we’ve been itching to do something together. When we were coming up with things for the album we were like, “He’s the ultimate villain.” I mean he’s such a sweetheart, but if you look at him, he’s just got this amazing look about him, like he can be the ultimate Bond villain. He’s got so many different sides to him. He’s just a big teddy bear at heart but his visage is very intense.

He’s an amazing writer. What’s your favorite comic?

Oh, what’s your favorite?

I like We3 and Arkham Asylum, but I definitely want to read more.

Arkham Asylum would go down as one of my favorites. I love all his work he’s done recently with Batman. I love the All-Star Superman run he did. The Justice League run was one of the best superhero comics I’ve ever read. The Invisibles. The Doom Patrol run he did in the ‘90s. Everything he’s touched is just so fantastic. He changed comic books in the same way the Beatles changed music.

Is there a song on the record that’s more special to you?

Yeah, I think our mutual favorite in the band is the “Kids from Yesterday.” To me the song is like a time machine. You listen to it and it makes us all think about growing up and it makes you think about being a kid. And then it makes you think about being a teenager. And it makes you think about where you are now and where you’re going. It’s kind of like the movie It’s a Wonderful Life. That’s the kind of journey I go on when I listen to that song. It’s just a very somber, introspective song and just one of the most powerful choruses I’ve heard in a rock song. Another favorite of mine is “S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W.”

That’s really different for you guys.

Yeah, it shows a dramatically different side to us. You know we all have such varied musical tastes and that’s one of them. We love that type of thing. And to finally be able to put something like that on one of our albums is a huge victory.

What song will be the most fun to play live?

Wow, let’s see. We just did a tour in Europe where we got to play about four [new] songs. We were alternating which four. They were all pretty amazing. “Planetary (Go!)” has taken on a crazy new life live. It got an immediate reaction from the crowd. They reacted to “Planetary” almost like they would have reacted to “I’m Not Okay.” It was this immediate explosion from the crowd. It looked like an avalanche of bodies. They were pogoing in unison. By the middle of the song they knew the words. It was just something else.

“Sing” is also a very special song. It’s a sentiment we’ve always wanted to say, you know, to be the best you that you can possibly be on any given day. And just try to make a positive difference in your own world or in the world outside you. There’s just magic to it. And the song itself is so emotional and moving and how it was written was real special. How it grew day by day, just layer by layer. Everyone would add his own touch to it. It’s one of the songs I’m most proud of on the album.

My Chemical Romance performs at the 101.9 RXP Yule Rock in New York on Dec. 3. Learn more at mychemicalromance.com.

#mikey way #mcr #dd #cw #interview #tina whelski #the aquarian #2010 #dec 2010 #12/29/10 #text #originals

[amorasia]

lets talk about something else? 🩷

im on a new hair jurney ! let talk about it real quick...

my natural hair is curly, a volumous 2c-3a curly hair. but when i was a kid, my hair was almost straight, kinda a wavy 2a, it changed to curly when i started puberty, at 11-12 year old.

since then i had mixed feeling about it, suddenly my hair was SO curly and SO volumous? and some people tried to make fun of calling me a "lion", but some people used to like it ! but ME, myself, didn't hate my curls, it was at the age 13 to 14 i started taking care of my hair more seriously like watching videos on youtube, buying new products and started using hair masks, i was washing my hair daily, was taking it seriously washing like almost everyday, i even used to put alarms on the days i had to wash my hair. but still wanted it to be back as wavy... i remember pretty well i was obsessed with having wavy hair and how beautiful it was, maybe because i had a hair like that and missed it, i didn't like the sudden volumous hair at all, so i did some chemicals to reduce it and straightned a lot in my preteen years. due to these process, my curls were loose and my volume did reduced, i was enjoying it on how it looked at the time. feeling pretty.

at age of 15, i decided to bleach my bangs and i was enjoying it as well! who didn't had the phase to do something different at 15? hahaha but somwhow this time i didn't want to use my curly hair anymore, it was the first time in life i cried looking at the mirror with my natural hair, so i did MORE straighting to my poor hair and it was like that until the pandemic started. 2020 i was 16 years old, since we had to study at home (wich i didn't, but that's another story lol) i dyed my bangs back to its natural color, and.... this is where all the things changed.

I still remember everyhting, when i stopped going to school i started to care more about my hair since i didn't had to style it every single day anymore, and i was so shocked that it was sooo dry and the curls DIED, like fr, i was doing hair treatments at home and some oil treatments but it wasnt doing any difference... it was really annoying to me. SO in 2020 april, i decided to cut my hair at collarbone lenght by myself and all somehow... it turned STRAIGHT, like, no kidding, it was real straight i was sooo confused and didn't like it at all lmaoo (and i did get covid in 2020 but i didn't see any harm on my hair like hair loss, my hair was dry because it was fucked up from so many straightments).

my hair was suffering due to what i have had done on my poor hair the past year, in 2019, so because of that my hair was 2 textures at once, the roots were puffy to the baby curls growing and the ends were full straight and when i used my curly creams to style it didn't curly at all and it was a really damaged hair, THANKFULLY school was so over that year so i could be ugly at home only hahaha.

doing so, i got back to do the haircare that i knew, i used to put food on my hair like, you know that internet recipts to use sugar, honey, tapioca, avocado, honey, etc to """deep treatment""" your hair? yeah, 100% fake. after a while, i stopped doing that because it does more harm than good to your hair, i think at the beggining of 2021 i started to invest more in a brazilian method called "hair cronogram" wich i had to wash my hair at least 3x a week alternating hydration, nutrition and reconstruction (i was doing this at 13 already, this time i was just doing with actual hair products instead lol), so i begun to buy actual hair masks and various hair oils. oils are so important for dry scalp and ends. some tips for you reading this. buy products that are created for HAIR, not food that you eat !!! please !!

in 2021, my hair grow a lot!! it was past my chest at the time, my roots were curling again and everything was cute, i was starting to love my hair again. this time my goal was to have my volumous curly hair again. i went to my birthplace, rio de janeiro, to visit my family after my grandma's death, and there i discovered and used a lot of different hair products and it was crucial for my journey.

in june 2021 i cut my hair, it was on my shoulder lenght and my curls were so back, but did something different...

i dyed my whole hair for the first time

did i did a good choice? a bad choice?

well, at the time it was a good choice. i was kinda bored with my natural dark brown hair, so i tried to be different (again because i want to change all the time lmao). it was the first time in YEARS i loved my hair SOOO much, it was the most curly i ever seen in my life and it was SO healthy ahh it was the best my hair ever was... i died it orange, a strawberry blonde, it was p-e-r-f-e-c-t. i loved every single time in it.

unfortunately it didn't last more than a month and made a huge mistake, my stupid ass used bleaching powder on my roots.... i misheard what my hairdresser had said to me, i used a hair toner instead of actual dye and my roots were more of a neon orange and the rest was normal.... it was the wrost! i was willing to jump off a bridge, and even more sad, i had to go to school in person 2 days after.... so i had to dye my whole hair in a different color to hide it and it was succesfull... i didn't know shit about dying hair so i was really struggling and the stupid friends that i had at the time didn't help me at all. but i accepted the new color but i wanted the old tone back... i loved it the strawberry blonde so much.

on december 2021, i dyed it purple. 🤓🤓🤓 funny it isn't? yeah but i reeeeally didn't like that red hair, i wanted the orange not this one, but still, my curls were there and really good, i was loving every single moment of my curls. my hair wasn't purple after a week, it was like my natural hair, but a little lighter, so my roots were appearing. at this time my parents were talking a lot on my head saying to stop touching my hair and blabla and it demotivated me a lot, my mom once called me a retarted for wanting to cut my hair again, but i did it anyways.

I was 17, i don't remember the date, but i wanted my orange again soo bad, i dyed my hair orange again, but unfortunately it wasn't the first orange i had, i never had it again actually. this time i got sad with my hair again. the hairdresser used bleaching powder on my hair and it damaged my curls again, it had loosen my curls and reduced my volume again, awful. i wasn't happy. the products i had were or old or my mother's discards and it wasn't doing anything on my hair since it was pure damage. i was so sad that i wasn't taking care of my hair that much anymore. I focused on studying art, was dedicating all my time on it. I was dying my roots at home.

in 2022 new year eve, i dyed my roots for the last time. after some time, i realized that my roots were at least 3 different colors, i felt so bad, everything was bad again, curls damaged and ugly color. in the middle of 2023 i decided to never dye my hair anymore for 3 reasons: it damaged my hair a lot, i wasn't feeling it anymore and i was spending more money than i have in it, and it was bad, didn't had too much time as well.

suddenly my hair went to be SUPER dry hair, my ends were AWFUL, the products i had wasn't that good to take care of my damaged hair and didn't had money to buy expensive products. i dyed a darker color again but it didn't change, the orange came back. and with all the events that happen in 2023: started using birth control, was washing my hair lesser (there were times i only washed my hair 4 times A MONTH), been a stress ball, art being bad, pregnant cat and ending friendships, combining everything = depression and hair loss.

in just 5 months, i had lost ALL my volume hair, my hair kept falling, i was panicking, my hair is tiny now. i have bald spots. it's fragile, dry, curls isn't curling again, it is very bad right now. veeery bad. the most damaged my hair has been ever in my life. i was dissapointed.

so how's it's my hair now?

now, january 2024, 19 years old. i can say i am taking care of it more than ever.

in november 2023 i cut my hair again, removed most of the bleached/dyed/damaged hair that i had, and cut even more in december. my hair is the shortest i ever had in my life, is upper my shoulder. the curls are more wavy now, maybe it's the birth control (wich i plan to stop using it as fast as possible this year) or the lenght, i am washing it daily again, at least 3-4 times a week, the old products are finally ending and i bought more expensive hair products little by little and i already see such a huuge diference. i don't do the hair cronogram method anymore since i have knowledge about it so i just do what i see whats my hair needs at the day, but i'm focusing to learn more on what my hair is and how it react to products and the weather.

since i moved i'm taking care of my hair daily, i decided to study more about the ingredients of the hair products and discovered more professional and good brands (god bless brazilian hair products because we are the best), bought more hair brushes and started to use hair tonic to estimulate hair growth.

my hair's still falling a lot, but i know this is a long journey, i know for the past years how long it took to grow haha so its not new to me! fortunately my hair growth is good and my genetics is strong, but unfortunately i had lost the track on my habits in the past 2 months but i want to eat healthier combining with the gym, this year cannot fail !! it has been pretty hard since i am demotivated at everything and it's so hard to go back to the routine... but here i am ! trying hard not to fall into my stupid depressed thoughts !!

my goal now is to have my hair 100% virgin again, my roots are pretty long right now and it looks amazing in touch and really soft and shiny, i'm learning new things about my brand new hair !! the fact that it's wavier now piss me off a little bit hahaha but we'll see! maybe only in 2026 i will be satisfied with my hair and it will be healthy for the first time ever. i will just continue with my hair journey, wich i love the most to take care of! i'm loving my hair again and can't wait to it to grow long again, the last time i had it long were at 15, and probably it'll be the first time it's going to be healthy and well cared. 🩷🩷🩷

should i put this attention and care about my skin and body as well? phew i have to get rich fast

#hairjourney #the amount of up and downs i had with myself lmaaoo #welp! thats life #i can say i'm very happy with my hair now #maybe i can update about my hair in here like when i buy new stuff or if i see an improvement in my hair growth #and help people as well since i have a lot of knowledge on it hahaha but i have to have a following first so heey

[alyles52]

Blog 1 Sustainability and How Humans Interact With the Environment

In the first chapter of the text we are introduced to sustainability and how the Earth has been a sustainable system for the last 3.8 billion years. After 5 mass extinctions the earth has been able to survive and give life to an astonishing variety of life. If organisms didn’t adapt to the earth’s conditions they just died off. As humans we have taken advantage of all that the Earth has to offer. This reading opened my eyes to see how it important it is that we go back to an old way of life and examine nature more and what it has to offer. Organisms have always been forced to develop a variety of ways to find food. “ Spiders create webs that are strong enough to capture fast-moving flying insects. Bats have a radar system for finding prey and avoiding collisions. These and many other abilities and materials were developed without the use of the high-temperature or high-pressure processes or the harmful chemicals that we employ in manufacturing. This explains why many scientists urge us to focus on learning from the earth about how to live more sustainably.”. I think there are pretty clear answers and examples of how we can live more sustainably on earth as humans. We probably would have to do without a lot of things and cut out some of the comfort but to help the Earth and its future it is imperative that we go back to some of the old ways that humans used the Earth before times such as the industrial revolution. While reading I was introduced to a new term I never seen called biomimicry. Biomimicry is the effort to understand, mimic and catalog the ways in which nature has sustained life on the earth for 3.8 billion years. Biomimicry is very interesting to me as I think it very much reverses a lot of the problems that we as humans have caused to the Earth. By just examining nature, it will simply give us all our answers and tools as we can live off necessity and not want. 

The textbook gives insight as to how the Earth is used economically in service. The book focuses on three points of sustainability. Nutrient cycling, human activities degrading natural capital, and finding solutions to the problems we have caused. Nutrient cycling is the earth's ability to not receive any new supplies of chemicals but over years the plant has been able to provide and recycle chemicals or nutrients. Humans degrade natural capital by using renewable sources of energy faster than nature can restore them and by overloading the earth’s normally renewable air, water, and soil with pollutants and wastes. The third component just simply talks about people coming together to protect the Earth’s natural capital. This is where groups of people can find conflict. Economically it may be benefit some people to cut trees down for example but for the environment there is no benefit and it harms the environment. Building some middle ground is going to have to be important if we want future generations to enjoy the earth. As humans we can't let money and comfort run us off of the face of the earth.

Question: What evidence would the world have to show people that if we keep living like this the Earth will no longer be sustainable?

Works Cited:

Spoolman, Scott, and G. Tyler Miller. Living in the Environment.

[ruthiesrambles2]

And a few others! 👀🤲🧠 (for Melanie, please)

Thank you again 😊

👀 Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

@gohoubi requested Melruth inspired by Dido's White Flag "I will go down with this ship". Working on a little moment between them before Melanie leaves for Breslauer. The wounds of Melanie's lies are still fresh, but at the same time this is clearly a suicide mission so whatever they say now could be permanent. I'm feeling particularly inspired by the line "I know I left too much mess and destruction to come back again".

🤲 Would you please share a snippet of a wip?

MY FRIEND YOU CAN HAVE THREE

A not Snowpiercer one:

When she felt the intrusion into her head, she pushed back hard, more with the intention to return to the uninterrupted pleasure of her torture than with the intention to pass the training. Did she even remember the training? That somewhere just beyond the door stood General Sarah Alder? Was she the one doing it? Touching her, making her feel… Fuck. The thought that this was Sarah had sent a shock straight to Petra’s core, and a flush rose up in her cheeks, shocked by her body’s reaction.

A Snowpiercer one:

Melanie’s voice sounded far away, and it took Ruth an embarrassingly long time to realise she was being spoken to.

“Everything okay, Ruth?” the voice finally breaking through the fog. “I asked what it was you needed.”

“I…uh… I need…” Ruth swallowed, trying to compose herself. “I can’t remember.”

And another not Snowpiercer:

Alex could sympathise, though she had no memory of New York before. She knew the process though, the slow degradation of memories no longer relevant to immediate survival. Alex could barely remember her parents’ faces, pushed out by more important things, like remembering into avoid the highways because that’s where the bodies pile up highest, like remembering that you can survive without food but that one winter night without shelter would kill you where you stood. The brain seemed not to be too selective, though, as images of the dead and dying, the smell of rotting flesh and the taste of vomit welled up inside her. Alex pushed them back down.

🧠 Pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon for them. (Melanie please)

I don't know why this is my favourite but... Melanie being too anxious to visit a hairdresser. Something about the small talk, the gossip, the touching, the snip snip of the scissors, the strong chemical smells, the social expectations and the sensory overload. It's the first favour she asks Ruth, a few weeks after the freeze. Just a trim. And every few months after that. It becomes their routine, Melanie washing her hair the way she likes to, with her own shampoo, then sitting on a chair with her knees up whilst Ruth cuts her hair slowly and in silence. Melanie giving herself permission to stop thinking just for ten minutes, letting there be nothing but the clicking of the scissors and Ruth's soft breathing. But suddenly Ruth is saying "there, I think that's neat enough" and Melanie knows that her break from reality is over all too quick.

#melanie Cavill #ruth wardell

[vinnival]

dancin💃👯‍♀️

A calming atmosphere blanketed the lab room you were currently in. Lunch hour has just ended, and you were getting ready to head back into your work, albeit reluctantly. Sighing, you sat up in your chair after staring at your phone for long enough.

"Where do I even go next...?" Your words broke the silence as you stared at your progress. This experiment was a tough one so far, and you were pretty sure you'd messed up on a few variables.

Your thought process was interrupted by your phone buzzing- a message from someone?

You unlocked your phone only to smile softly when you in fact see a message-

"Yo :o)! Doin anything important?"

You smiled harder when your friend sent another message after that:

"Doesn't matter, I'm coming over!"

"at least remember to knock, hof" You replied, feeling excited that Dr. Hofnarr was coming to visit you.

"You know what, I'll knock down your door and bring in the whole circus with me just because you said that"

That made you chuckle. Finally, you had a reason to actually clean up your lab and move around! Standing up, you rushed to clean, putting chemicals away and turning on extra lights.

You were in the middle of straightening your papers after organizing them when a soft knock came from the metal door blocking you off from the rest of the building.

"Come in!" You called over your shoulder, and the familiar sound of your door opening and a pleased hum met your ears.

"I do hope I wasn't interrupting anything." Were their first words. You turned and met their cheerful gaze, grinning back at him.

"Oh, my splendid friend Doctor Hofnarr, you couldn't have come a better time!"

After a little banter, you went on explaining your current experiment dilemma. You were kind of stuck in a metaphorical hole at the moment, and Hof seemed very interested in what you were doing.

After you finished explaining, he took a couple seconds to respond.

He looked at you, a gentle smile gracing his face that was making your brain freak out at how cute he looked. "Would you like my help?"

You blinked, "Yes- yes, is that even a question?"

He nodded, and scooted you over, getting in front of your current work, studying it from all angles.

You watched as the gears turned in his brain. You almost never talk with anyone in person, so interacting with him was a breath of fresh air, since he mentioned before that he's not a social person himself. Hell, he's more outgoing online than he is in person.

Not that you were complaining, oh heavens no. You loved both versions of his personality. He's a sweetheart in person yet is actually really funny and social over the internet (and is also a sweetheart too).

He's just... probably the nicest person you've met in this damned building. You have no idea how he's so positive, so nice, especially with how he's treated. He was so... perfect.

"Hmm, yes, yes. So, I can see a probable place where you've missed something crucial-"

"Hofnarr, have you ever danced with someone before?"

Your hand flew to your mouth in shock. You didn't even think about it, it just tumbled out! What were you thinking? Now he's going to think you're rude, and-

He looked over to you, a quizzical look on his face. You didn't sense any annoyance in his demeanor, though- thank the gods.

"N-no, why ask?" His voice was quiet. He doesn't talk much louder than that unless he was talking about things he liked, or was comfortable enough around someone.

You blanked out. Why DID you ask that?

"I- I was just wondering, because y'know, it's just... a thought... that happened... in my head?" Your brain was lagging, your words coming out slowly. As long as he understood, at least?

You decided to say something extra risky.

"I... also wouldn't mind dancing with y-you," you muttered out. The room was quiet, so your request was loud and clear. Hofnarr kept staring at you, a look of shock falling onto his face now.

"I- I- I mean, if you dont want t-"

"No, no, shush," he immediately cut you off, standing up straight quickly and holding out his hands in a 'calm down' motion. You were beginning to sweat with nervousness.

His voice broke the silence again, "If you have music, I'd love to try it with you," he whispered out.

Heat spread through your face, and you nodded shyly. How were they turning you to putty so easily?

Heading over to your phone, you absentmindedly connected an AUX to the speakers held within the bottom row of cabinets lined up against your lab wall.

Picking a slow song, you turned back to see Hofnarr already standing in the open area of the room, anxiously fidgeting with their fingers and avoiding your eyes. Was this really happening?

Time seemed to move slowly as you approached the scientist, staring at him in wonder. His own anxious eyes met yours, and he cleared his throat, preparing to say something.

"Again, I- I never danced with anyone be-before, so... Please be patient and help?" His tiny voice made your stomach twist.

"Of c-course, it's been a few years myself, but I- I'll help!" You ignored your flaming cheeks and got in position, gently placing his hands where they had to go before placing your own where they needed to go.

And it began.

The two of you started out slow, Hofnarr's hands were a little clammy and shaky, and he kept stepping on your feet (followed by a tiny "eep- sorry!"), but you didn't mind. It was wonderful, it felt ethereal. You felt happy.

As he got more comfortable with dancing, he began to straighten up, looking directly into your eyes with newfound confidence and a happy smile on his face once again.

You two danced, and danced, danced until your feet hurt, until you both were breathless from spins and dips and twirls. You danced until finally, you both collapsed onto the little couch area of your lab.

Leaning on him, you airily laughed, taking in the moment. Calming down, his arm found its way over your shoulder, and you wrapped your own arm around his midsection.

"...I still have work to do," you took a second to chuckle at your not-so-funny joke. You heard a likewise noise come from Hof, and they patted your shoulder lightly. "You got this, friend. I believe in you, and I'll help you if you need it."

Truth be told, you felt so much better about working, but you wanted this moment to last forever. This was your first true friend in so, so long. They're very special to you.

"...That was fun, can we do that again sometime?" Your voice acted before your brain processed it once again, but this time? You didn't regret it.

"Of course!"

You both hugged each other tighter.

me chasing after hofnarr

#madness combat #i look at fanart of him and start crying #/hj #i cry internally #I CRIED INTERNALLY WRITING THIS #HE DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER #madness combat x reader #dr hofnarr #hofnarr x reader #i just wanna. kith #lord #I WANT TO HUG HIM #im feeding every hofnarr simp rn #finally a write a fic for my bb #my meow meow #stares directly at u

[hangovercurse]

Crash Into Me

You’d been MGK’s assistant for years, but you never thought you had a chance at anything more with him until one stoplight changes everything.

Request: “ok im so sorry if this is 2 specific but ive had this idea for ages abt pining!colson x an insecure/clueless!reader who has been his assistant forever. she gets into a car accident and calls him hours later to tell him that a temp will be taking her place for a few weeks (bc of injuries) and he's like ?? why?? she explains nonchalantly, then kells kinda freaks out and shows up at the hospital all worried”

Colson Baker X Reader

Warnings: Cursing, car accident (descriptive)

A/N: This was cute 😊

Word Count: 3185

“Alright Kells, I’m out for the night. I’ll email those tracks to the board when I get home and I’ll let you know if I get any updates for tomorrow’s press.” You told the blond man who was sitting on the couch as you put your laptop into your bag. You tried not to yawn as you heaved it over your shoulder, “anything else?”

You glanced at the kitchen clock that read 2 am and let out a small sigh. You were used to late nights given your job as assistant to a rockstar, but most nights you were able to leave before 8 pm. Tonight you and Colson had gotten really invested in the tracks you were editing and lost track of time.

“Y/N,” he turned to look at you with puppy dog eyes. He wanted something that you really weren’t gonna want to give him. “Could you come over early tomorrow to help me pick out what to wear for the Vanity Fair interview?”

You chuckled, “you know they have their own wardrobe department?”

He sighed, “yeah but you know me so much better than all those stylists. I trust your opinion more.”

You rolled your eyes as he tilted his head, begging you. “Fine, but I’m buying us coffee with your credit card.”

He broke out into a smile, “thank you, love you!” He called as you walked towards his front door.

“Whatever, I’ll see you tomorrow.” You told him, taking your car keys into your hands, and stepping out into the LA night. There was a soft breeze that shook the trees slightly, making you smile. It felt nice outside for the first time in a while.

Because of this, you decided to drive home with your windows rolled down, letting the wind flow through your hair. The roads were pretty barren by LA standards, so traffic was pretty much non-existent. You were sitting at a red light, your fingers tapping against your steering wheel as one of Colson’s songs played through your speakers softly.

You reached to turn up the volume as the light turned green. You pressed the gas, your car moving forward into the intersection. Suddenly you heard a loud squeal of brakes, looking over to your passenger window to the sight of two headlights barreling towards you. You tried to speed up to get out of the way, but it was too late.

The truck rammed straight into the side of your small car, pushing your vehicle over into the car next to you. You put your left arm up to shield you from any flying debris, but it was futile. The infrastructure of your car fell apart at the force, the dashboard collapsing onto your right leg. Luckily, your left leg managed to avoid the destruction.

You could barely feel the force of the whiplash due to the pain in your abdomen at the deployment of the airbag. Glass from the car next to you fell into your car through your open window, cutting into your skin.

And then all of a sudden, everything stopped. The truck that had hit you had stopped moving, allowing you to fully assess the damage. Your car was totaled for sure, and your leg was definitely crushed. You cried out in pain, breathing heavy and trying to see straight. You could hear the sound of sirens in the distance, giving you some sense of relief.

When the paramedics got to the scene, you were the last passenger to be taken out of the crash due to your car being in the center. A firefighter had to break the glass of your windshield, which was already cracked, in order to pull you out. When you told him your leg was stuck under the dashboard, he sent a team of men to lift it from your foot and another to pull you out of the wreckage.

They were all amazed you were still conscious but got very worried when you told them you couldn’t feel the pain in your leg. You rode in an ambulance to the hospital, the EMTs helping pick the glass from your skin and assessing your injuries. You made jokes with them to calm yourself down, something that you did with Colson and Rook whenever they got into accidents while you were out with them.

You thought about giving them Colson’s name when they asked about your emergency contact but decided against it. You didn’t want to worry him until absolutely necessary. You figured you’d see what the doctor had to say and if you wouldn’t be able to come back to work, then you would tell him.

Unfortunately, that’s exactly what the doctor said. In fact, you wouldn’t be able to leave the hospital for at least a week due to your shattered leg, bruised abdomen, and concussion.

The leg would require at least 2 if not more surgeries to repair and you would be on close watch for development of a more serious brain injury. After that you most likely wouldn’t be able to be back on your feet for another 8 to 12 weeks, which was kind of a requirement for your job.

It was almost 5am, so you weren’t necessarily thinking straight when you called Colson from your cracked phone. He answered, his voice conveying how tired he was. “Y/N? Everything okay?”

“Hey Kells, I’m not gonna be able to come in early tomorrow, or at all. I’m gonna start looking for a temporary replacement tomorrow if I’m feeling up to it. Oh! And I couldn’t send those tracks to the board, sorry.” You told him, only half registering the words you were saying.

The confusion was evident in his voice, “what? Why do you need to find a replacement?”

You realized you had forgotten to tell him what happened. “Oh, yeah! It’s kind of funny.” You started, chuckling but then realizing that laughing made your stomach hurt even more. “And by funny, I mean not funny at all. I got into a car accident. Some dude ran into my car in an intersection and now I’m in the hospital.”  

“Which hospital?” Colson asked, suddenly much more awake.

“Hollywood Presbyterian.” You told him, “why?”

He sounded like he was rushing around, which he was. “I’m coming to see you.”

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, “why? I’m fine, you don’t need to do that. You have a big interview tomorrow, you should sleep.”

Colson sighed, “fuck the interview, I’ll be there in a few.”

“Colson you don’t-“ You started, but he hung up before you could tell him not to come.

Why was he rushing to see you in the hospital? Sure, you were friends, but he had much more important things to worry about right now. And besides, you were more casual work friends. He wouldn’t even know you existed if you didn’t work for him. Sure, you had a huge crush on him, but he was your boss, you were just someone he asked to do things he didn’t want to do.

 20 minutes later Colson ran into the hospital room, stopping when he saw you in the bed. Your face was red from chemical burn and a few cuts of glass. Your right leg was propped up with basic bandaging around it. His heart broke at the thought of how much pain you had probably been in.

“How are you feeling?” He asked softly, moving to sit in the chair on your left side.

You shrugged, “I’ve been better.”

“Why didn’t you call me sooner?” He asked, eyes full of pity.

“I didn’t want to bother you unless it was serious. Figured I’d find out if I would have to miss work before telling you.” You said, squeezing your eyes shut as a headache washed over you.

Colson’s mouth gaped open, “you didn’t want to bother me? You got in a car crash and you weren’t gonna call me unless you would have to miss work?”

You shrugged again, “yeah. If my laptop wasn’t completely crushed in the accident I would’ve just found and sent a temp in tomorrow, but obviously that’s impossible.”

“Y/N you’re kidding me, right?” He asked, exasperated. You furrowed your eyebrows in response, causing a sigh to fall from his lips. “Y/N I don’t give a shit about a temp; I want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Oh, I’m fine. A little shaken and these headaches are killer, but they gave me a lot of pain medication so, I’m fine.” You smiled at him, your thoughts racing as you tried to figure out why he cared so much about how you were feeling.

He nodded, hand reaching out and landing on top of yours gently. “So, do they have to do surgery? What all did the doctors say?” He asked, worry in his eyes.

You nodded, “yeah, at least 2 surgeries. One around 11 am and then depending on how that one goes they’ll schedule the next. And they have to watch me to make sure my concussion doesn’t get worse.”

He pulled out his phone, typing away. “What are you doing?” You asked, suddenly feeling very tired.

“I just emailed the PR liaison for Vanity Fair and told them I wouldn’t be able to make it to the interview.” He responded.

“Why did you do that?” You asked through a yawn.

He looked at you like the answer was the most obvious thing in the world, “because I have to be with you right now.”

You were very confused as to why he thought he had to be here. “Colson, I’ll be fine. You should go to the interview. You don’t have to stay here.”

“I do have to be here. I want to be here.” He said, sternly.

“Why?” You asked, trying to keep your eyes open.

“Because I wanna make sure you’re okay.”

“I’ll just call you after the surgery, it’s no big deal.” You responded lazily.

He shook his head, “I want to stay here with you, Y/N. Okay? I care about you.”

You were too tired to process what he was saying at this point, so you just let out a hum. “I need to make sure you’re okay. I need to see you being okay. When you called me, I swear I was gonna have a heart attack if I didn’t see you.” He continued.

You were barely awake at this point, letting out a simple, “I’m okay” before slipping into unconsciousness.

 Suddenly you were back in your car, “Bloody Valentine” playing from your speakers. The sky was dark green, almost like a painting. In front of you, the red light turned green. Like clockwork, you pressed the gas, moving into the intersection. Suddenly, the lights disappeared, and you heard the familiar chilling sound of breaks squealing. You looked over and saw those headlights coming towards you, getting closer and closer, brighter, and brighter.

You screamed at the sight, the familiar paralyzing fear coursing through your body again. “Y/N!” Your name played through the radio. That’s not in the song, you thought. “Y/N!” Colson’s voice rang out again before the truck made contact with your car.

You woke up in a cold sweat to Colson standing over you, hands shaking your shoulders lightly. “Y/N.” He said, relieved when your eyes began to open.

Your entire body was shaking like a poodle and your arms subconsciously reached for Colson, hanging onto his shirt for dear life. “It was just a dream.” He whispered as your eyes darted around the room. “You’re okay.” He reassured you.

“I’m sorry.” You muttered, hands leaving the fabric and moving to cover up your face. “I’m sorry.”

Colson sat on the bed next to you, legs hanging off the side as he stroked your face gently. “It’s okay, baby.” He turned to the nurse who opened the door, a worried expression on her face. He shook his head at her, “sorry, she just had a nightmare. She’s okay.” The nurse nodded but stayed in the room anyways, checking your vitals.

“I’m sorry.” You mumbled again, the words seeming to be the only thing you could say.

Colson shook his head, “stop saying that, it’s okay.” You pouted at him, trying to scoot over so he would lay down next to you, but it was way too painful. “What are you doin?” He asked, a smile on his face.

You sighed, “wanted you to sit next to me but I can’t move because of this stupid leg.” You motioned to the leg in question.

Colson chuckled, “I can sit next to you in the chair.”

“That didn’t work last time.” You whined.

He looked at you with an expression that was both amused and confused. You were definitely still high on pain medication. “What didn’t work.”

“It didn’t stop the nightmare.” You frowned, hand reaching for his. He chuckled, standing up fully and looking at the nurse.

She flashed him an amused smile, “If you want, we can try to move her. I don’t know how much we can do without hurting her ribs, though.”

Colson nodded with a gracious smile, “hear that? We can’t move you because of your ribs.”

You glared at him, “I may be very high right now, but I’m not that high.” You said, making him giggle. “She said you could try.”

Colson let out an exasperated sigh, one arm going under your back and the other under your left leg. “Is this what it’s like taking care of me all the time?” He asked and you nodded your head firmly.

“Yep. Except I am much smaller than you, so you have less work to do with me.” You smiled as he lifted you off the bed, which quickly turned into a grimace. “Ow!” You yelped and Colson quickly set you down, slightly closer to the right side of the bed.

“Fuck, sorry princess. Are you okay?” He asked, voice soft.

You nodded, sucking in your bottom lip to block the whimpers of pain that threatened to escape your mouth. “You probably don’t remember, but one time you were so crossed that you called me to pick you up from a party. But you couldn’t make it out of the car, so I had to carry you into your house. And then you demanded to sleep in your own room, so you made me drag you up the stairs instead of passing out on the couch like normal.”

Colson let out a breathy chuckle, glad you weren’t hurt too much. He carefully sat onto the cot next to you, pulling up his right leg to sit on the bed. His arm wrapped around your shoulders and pulled you into him slightly. You shifted so that you were comfortable, left hand finding his own left hand and holding it. He brought his left leg up onto the bed so he was fully laying with you.

Your head rest on his chest, a soft smile on your face as his thumb rubbed circles on your hand. The nurse left, satisfied that you wouldn’t hurt yourself further. Colson pressed a small kiss to the top of your head, causing your eyebrows to furrow.

“What time is it?” You asked him, to which he responded by pulling out his phone and showing you the lock screen. 8:47am. You nodded, a frown on your face, “did you get any sleep?” You asked him softly.

“I’m fine, I was asleep for a few hours before you called me.”

You sighed, feeling guilty. “You should go home and get some sleep.”

You felt him shake his head from behind you, “I’m staying right here.”

Despite wanting to force him to go home, you couldn’t help the happiness you felt at his stubbornness to stay with you. “You know you don’t need to be here. I won’t be offended if you leave.”

He chuckled, “stop trying to get me to leave. I’m here. On my own accord, okay? I’m gonna take care of you.”

You paused, thinking about the word floating around your head. “Why?” you whispered.

Colson’s face scrunched in confusion, “what do you mean “why”? Because you’re my friend and I care about you.”

“I mean, yeah. But I’m not like a “drop everything” kind of friend, I’m just your assistant.” You muttered.

Colson made an “are-you-serious?” face and let out a snort. “Seriously? You are so much more than you give yourself credit for. You mean the world to me, of course I’d drop everything for you.”

You couldn’t think of a response, his words making your heart race. “oh.” Was the best you could come up with.

“Y/N, seriously, you think way too low of yourself. You’re amazing.” He said, nose burying into your hair.

You shrugged, “you only say that because I take care of you when you’re drunk and help you do all the things you don’t want to do.”

Colson’s expression softened, a frown forming on his face. “I’m saying that because I think the world of you. You’re the kindest, funniest, coolest person I know. I meant it, when you told me you were in the hospital, my heart almost stopped. I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about you being hurt.” He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing, “I wish you could see how much you mean to me.” He mumbled.

You were quiet for a little while, processing what he had said. “You’re only saying that because I’m in the hospital.” You muttered, a frown on your face. You were trying to keep your hopes low, knowing once you were out of here, he would regret saying any of this.

“Y/N, are you being serious right now? I’m saying this because I’ve been fucking in love with you for the past year and a half.” He said and you could feel your breath catch in your throat. “I can’t believe you don’t see it.”

You bit your lip, turning to look up to him. “I just- I didn’t want- you wouldn’t.” You stumbled over your words, taking a deep breath, and starting again. “I didn’t want to read too much into it or get my hopes up. I figured you’d never be into someone like me so I just told myself you were being nice. I thought you only treated me well because I worked for you.” You mumbled.

He frowned, holding you tighter to him, “I am so, so into you. You are the only woman in my life who has ever stuck by me through my worst shit. Like even when I was a total jackass you stayed with me. How could I not fall in love with you?”

You bit your lip, tears threatening to spill at his sweet sentiment. You’d never had anyone say something that kind about you. You’d always assumed people only kept you around because you did stuff for them, but here was the man you were in love with telling you that he cared about you for you.

“I love you too.” You whispered, leaning your head further into his chest.

#mgk #mgk imagine #mgk angst #mgk fluff #machine gun kelly #colson baker imagine #machine gun kelly imagine #Colson baker #colson x reader #colson baker fluff #colson baker angst #colson imagine

[allandoflimbo]

Ashens (Part 22)

Summary: She falls in love with Bucky Barnes from the moment she sees him. Bucky, still in love with a woman from his past, hates Y/N and plans to make her life miserable. To both their dismay, they are assigned together to go undercover into The Capitol for six months. There, they develop a heartbreaking friend with benefits agreement. Dystopian.

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Chapter Word Count: 3,600

Rating: M for Mature, E for explicit. Enemies to lovers trope, sharing a bed trope, friends with benefits trope, temporarily unrequited love, heavy and angry sex, heavy on the angst, and very strong language.

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He’s been gone all morning. You don’t know where he went and you didn’t ask before he left. Whatever it was, you weren’t too concerned, anyway. It was about time you two had some space. It helped clear your mind and helped you move on. You were moving on.

There was another reason you were thankful he had left for the morning. You could feel the chills run up the sides of your arms, goosebumps appearing where your skin was once smooth.

You eyed the closet doors curiously. It was almost eerie how quiet it was around you. You dropped your eyes for only a moment before raising them up again.

You had to do this. You were going to do this.

You finally gather the balls to do something you’ve been wanting to for some time now. It had been eating away at you like mad.

Once in front of the closet, you crouch down. You raise your left hand slowly roll the doors open, your eyes immediately dart down to the little black box on the ground. Exactly where he’d left it.

Part of you was happy that it remained untouched.

Per Steve’s orders, you had both buried any of your weaponry about a mile before reaching the wall nearly three months ago. You weren’t supposed to be bring any inside with you. It was forbidden.

It had shocked you when you and Bucky had been arguing about going after Ashen and he had pulled out a G19, angrily strapping it onto his leg to prove a point. He obviously snuck it in. At the time, you hadn’t really given it much thought. You were more shocked that he ignored his best friend’s request.

Now, it concerned you for different reasons.

You sat criss cross in front of the box, staring at it for a few more long seconds. Taking in a deep breath, you opened it. It opened with a small click.

There it was.

Matte black. Subtle but deadly.

You eyed the gun like it was a ticking bomb. You’ve never held a fire arm before, but that wasn’t necessarily why you were nervous. You were nervous to know why the hell he had it stacked away in your bedroom when you knew he didn’t even have the intention of killing anyone on this mission. He made sure to make you aware of this, many times.

You also knew it wasn’t to be used on you. There was no way.

The only other plausible reason he had it, kept you on edge.

You didn’t want your thoughts going there.

You reached slowly for the gun until you felt it lay heavy in your right hand. It was heavier than it looked. It felt deadlier than it looked.

You swallowed thickly, allowing yourself to think the worst.

Was he going to use this on himself?

You suddenly wanted it as far away from you as possible.

Your hand trembled slightly as you put it back in its place, letting your fingers linger on the ridges for just a moment.

You let out a long breath realizing.

When you had eyed the closet, you didn’t really think it through.

What were you going to do once you had it in your hands? Were you going to get the gun and hide it? Were you just curious? Was there something about it that secretly terrified you and you weren’t going to believe you really saw him hold it until you held it yourself?

You shake your head, pushing the box back into its original place. You were over exaggerating.

He probably just brought it in case you both needed it for self protection.

You looked over at your black back pack right next to it and pulled it out.

You fished inside, looking at different things you forgot you still had. You had your grey sweater, scarf, and beat up boots at the bottom. It smelled dusty.

You stuck your hand into the front pocket of the backpack, pulling out a note. It wasn’t your first time reading it, but you need the gentle reminder.

Thank you again for doing this. Thank you for helping me out and for agreeing to our plan to help Bucky be happy again. We can do this together. That plan, to me, is the most important thing right now. Thank you for doing whatever it takes to mentally convince him he deserves happiness. What you’re doing means the world to me, y/n. See you both again very soon. I’ll make it up to you. I promise.

Steve

You felt small tears in your eyes at your promise. If only he knew how it wasn’t so easy. You closed your eyes tightly together, took a deep breath, and placed the note onto your chest.

I’ll keep trying.

+ +

You didn’t understand these jobs that came with your ID. You didn’t understand most of what you were being told to do, but you did it anyway.

At the end of the day, your number one plan was to still kill Ashen. So you went through with what Bucky ordered you to do until it was time.

Your first day at the tower started off better than how you thought it would. Mr. Hyde was a old gentleman in his late 50s. He had short white hair and a nicely trimmed white beard to compliment it. He knew you were learning and that this would be your first time working up to a secretary job, so he started you off with small assistant duties like transporting paper work around the building, scheduling, and grabbing anything personal he may need here and there.

The best part was when he gave you a tour of the building, the whole reason you even were excited about it. Maybe this was why this was written into the mission.

He explained to you what each floor was but never took you past floor 15. You eyed the buttons on the elevator suspiciously.

He said that wasn’t their area and that “we didn’t need to worry about it”. You needed a special code to access those floors anyway.

You quickly made a connection. You wondered how Bucky had gotten in the other day.

The atmosphere in the elevator went cold when you stopped somewhere on the seventh floor and a man dressed in black and gold walked in. It was a fitted suit, expensive looking, and he had a cold look in his eyes. You swallowed thickly, looking away from him. You pulled your scarf tighter around your neck, trying to conceal your tattoo as much as you could.

Something about this man was off.

You heard the term Coroner a lot when you worked serving drinks. They weren’t the coroner most people knew, they were cop meets bounty hunter.

There was just something about them that left you uneasy. He stood in front of you and you felt yourself shuffle back a few inches. You looked over at Mr. Hyde and he gave you a small smile.

You smiled back.

+ +

It wasn’t until your fourth day at the building when things finally took a turn.

Bucky was going to meet you at a stairwell for floor eleven. He was going to trace Silas down once and for all. The night after the ball, Bucky was went traced them down to see where they would take the new import. According to what he overheard, there had been some complications and it wouldn’t be administered until today.

You got up from your seat, pretending you were just looking for the restroom, when you turned down the narrow hallway and went for the door that led into the stairwell.

You had three floors to climb up to meet him.

You were on the ninth floor when you turned the corner of the stairs and your heart nearly jumped up into your throat.

His face, his hair, his eyes, and his damn voice.

It all hit you at once and you turned back the direction you came from, leaning back against the steal rods. You put a hand up to your head as you felt dizzy. You could feel your heart beating away like crazy and you felt that anger you harbored down for so long.

It was him. The face from the diner and the face of the man that killed your mom and dad.

Ashen.

And he was with another woman.

“He’s our child and he’s dying!” The woman shouted. You could hear the tears in her voice.

“I know but there’s not much else I can do,” the voice. It was deep and violent. You hated it. You hated him, “He woke up this morning, cured! Without us even giving him the dose of the chemical. It’s obvious his plasma contains some kind of fending off mechanism. It took years, but he obviously survived it and no longer has it.”

You took a deep breath as you processed what you were hearing.

Had the little boy been infected with the virus, but now was doing well?

“And?” The woman insisted.

“And?” An evil laugh came from within Ashen’s chest, “We need all his blood, goddamn it! We need it distributed to our men if we want our side to stay strong once we go out there!”

“You can’t possibly still think—“

“It’s our world —“

“But we are safe here. Our son is safe here!”

“You didn’t think we’d all stay stuck in here for all eternity, did you? Hydra and Sword is to control the world, not the city. These walls kept us safe long enough and our son is well now, and we might have the cure in our hands. It’s all we need to conquer.”

You could hear sniffling.

“You can’t kill our son.” The woman begged.

“No,” he said slowly, “Not yet at least. We need trial periods.”

“Ashen, please-“

“I sacrificed everything for him!” A shriek followed by a gruntled groan came from the woman and you wondered what he was doing to her, “I cut the plan short, of us taking the capitol, because of him! I was minding my own business that night before I got the call. I took the risks, I found the refuge, I found the goods, and I called an initiative, and now look at us, we’re all safe. And our son just also happens to be the possible cure for all of this. If Hydra completing this mission requires my son’s life, so be it.”

“I won’t let you hurt him! I won’t let you pick at him with needles and knives. He is my baby boy!”

“Was, honey, was.” You could hear a loud smack, “And after him, you’re next.”

“What?”

“Now let’s get back in there and congratulate him.”

You could still feel your heart beating away inside of your ears as you heard the shuffling of their feet, followed by the closing of a door.

This was way too much information for you to process. This was too much for you. Suddenly, you cursed Bucky for making you work intel. Intel was the worst part.

You knew this information and now you had to tell him without freaking out, or worst, freaking him out.

It didn’t take much longer for a familiar face to turn the corner of the stairwell.

His blue eyes met yours over his scarf.

“What the hell are you doing here, I said eleventh —-“ his voice faltered as he watched your stricken face. His own eyes fell and he raised a hand to the back of your head and caressed it softly, “Hey, hey, it’s okay. What’s going on?”

“I—“ you whimpered out. Bucky hushed you as he leaned his forehead against yours. He closed his eyes tightly together, “I—he—“

“Breathe. Breathe. Breath for me.”

You took in a deep breath and controlled your breathing.

When you opened your eyes he was staring straight down at you.

“I saw him.” Bucky’s eyes darted over your face, knowing exactly what you were talking about. Who you were talking about, “I saw him.” You repeat again. He nods, “I can’t stay here, Bucky. Not when he’s here. He killed mom and dad, Bucky.” You whimpered into a cry.

“Hey, shhhh,” he brought his hand to your jaw and ran his thumb there gently, “shhh. I’m sorry,” he straightens his head up over yours and places a kiss on the top of your head, “I’m sorry you saw him.”

You ran your hands up his chest and softly pushed him away from you. Bucky’s face fell, along with his hands at his sides. You looked away from him, running the back of your sweater-clothed hand underneath your nose.

You needed to create distance. You and him, whatever it was, was no more.

“I overheard them.”

“Them?”

You sighed, running a hand through your hair.

“Yes, them. Him and what I can only imagine is maybe his wife? I don’t know, it was another woman. The little boy’s mother.”

Bucky took a deep breath.

“Okay, and what did they say?”

“He’s going to kill him. He can potentially save us, save all of us, but instead he’s going to kill him, I—I—“ you were freaking out as your ran both hands down your face.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“The boy!” You shouted quietly, pointing to the direction where the stairs continued. “Ashen is after the boy. He’s going to kill the mom and he’s after the boy, too.”

“What? Why? Why is he after his own son?”

You took a deep breath and met Bucky’s gaze again. His jaw was tight and he looked apprehensive.

“They think the cure is in his plasma.” You say slowly and carefully, knowing how much weight the words held.

“The cure?”

“For the virus. The boy’s blood.”

Bucky let out a long breath, running a hand through his own hair now and pulling on it.

“And why does he want the child dead? Does he not want the cure?”

“No, no he does.”

“What? He wants it just for himself?” You whined as you looked away again, “Y/N, you came on this mission for this reason. It’s for you to give me the important information you have right at this moment. Tell me, why does he want the boy dead?”

“He says he wants to make enough just for Hydra and Sword,” Bucky’s face went pale, “I’m assuming it’s because he doesn’t want anyone else after that having access to it. He kills the boy, no more cure for anyone else.”

“That,” his tongue clicks, “That’s absurd. Hydra wants to recruit more bad, not kill off the remaining race. It defeats the purpose of world domination.”

“I think they have a change of plans. They said they want to control the rest of the world.”

“With a raging virus? How is that even possible?”

“I don’t know. That was all he said before I heard him choking his wife. I don’t know what they plan to do after they go out there, protected. I don’t know.”

“And in that vile? What was in the vile?”

“I don’t know, a trial drug. But nothing as good as the boy’s blood.”

Bucky lets out a long breath as he walks back and forth, clearly stressed and overwhelmed. You watched him, intrigued. You’ve never seen him worry like this before.

“Shit, shit, shit.” he mumbles under his breath, “What do we do? What do we do.”

You stare down at his feet as they continue to move across the floor.

“I think it’s obvious what we need to do.”

“What?”

“We need to take him.” You say seriously, looking Bucky dead in the eye.

“We need to take him.” He says back.

“We can’t let Hydra have access to the cure and let the rest of the world burn and we can’t get him get killed.” You place a hand on Bucky’s arm to stop him and he looks up at you. You could practically see the emotions in his eyes, “He’s just a little boy.”

“Unfortunately, I can’t just go in there and take the kid. I can’t just kidnap someone’s child.”

“Why not?” You ask simply.

Bucky lets out a scoff.

“What?”

“Bucky look at the stakes here. He wants him killed, he’ll build an army to dictate the rest of the world. Bucky we have no other option. This is the end of the world. There is no time for common courtesy.”

“Okay. Okay, just relax. We need to plan this through, okay? So far us two and his parents are the only ones who know about him right?”

“I mean his doctor probably knows too and also the scientist he’s working with. The man who probably sent in those viles.”

“Those viles can be good too, right? We need to take those, too. At least a few. There has to be a reason they brought them in. Maybe they aren’t timely useless. Trial drug or not.”

“So we take the boy, now—”

“We can’t, y/n.” Bucky says strictly. You don’t expect his hand to cup your cheek again. It takes your breath away. Why was he behaving this way? “He said he’ll wait anyway. They probably need to run tests first. We still have two and a half months left in here. If we take him now, they’ll notice he’s gone, and Hydra’s already suspecting there’s intruders inside the wall. It’s too risky. We need to wait,” he runs his hand over your chin and tilts his head slowly to the side. A pained look is in his eyes, “I know you want to, and I want to, too, but we need to do this carefully.”

“So what do you suggest?” Your voice comes out rough.

“I don’t know, maybe we can keep an eye on him or something.” He says. “His father works here, maybe you’ll see him around. Warm up to him. Make sure he’s safe.”

“Ashen knows what I look like.”

Bucky nods.

“I know that. Maybe there’s something we can do. Maybe I can find where he stays in the building. I’ll figure something out. And you’ll be safe, I promise. He won’t see you.”

You believe Bucky’s words and you nod.

“Okay.”

“What do you think? Should we risk him seeing me?” He says with a small smile on his face.

You look at him incredulously.

“Are you dumb?”

“What?” He asks like it’s nothing.

“You’re Captain America’s best fiend. If you really think he wouldn’t recognize you right away and run and tell his dad, you’re insane.”

___

It had been a successful day. It was exhausting and you and Bucky were both clearly burnt out, emotionally and mentally. A lot happened for both of you. You both took a shower, individually of course, you had dinner and you finally got him to watch the first half of Titanic. It was a long night.

But it wasn’t the end of the day yet.

You sat on the bed crisscross and in your PJs, looking out into the city, deep in thought.

Bucky moves over to you and across the bed and you close your eyes tightly together, feeling the bed dip down. You can feel him as he puts his hand on your shoulder.

“We’ll save him, okay? Imagine how much Steve will love us when you come back not only with a life saved, but with the cure.” His words are gentle and sweet, but hold so much weight over you.

You couldn’t do this. You made that promise a few days ago.

“Look, Bucky I don’t think we should do this anymore. Our agreement.” You say quietly, your voice breaking off at the end.

He went still and you felt a cold rush where he began to remove his hand from your skin.

“Oh, I didn’t realize that—“

“Bucky—“

“I didn’t know you weren’t in the mood. I’m sorry.”

“No,” you say quietly and so heartbreakingly slow that you know he can feel it too. Why did it feel this way? “It’s not that.” You slowly turn around to face him. He’s got both arms stretched down on the bed below him, palms down, and he’s staring at you like he was afraid you would hurt him again like you did the other night. You looked away from him and pushed yourself away to give you both more room to breathe

“Sweetheart—“

“I’ve decided to go out with Pietro again,” You watch as his eyes drop from your own to the spot just next to your arm. He swallows hard and there’s a flicker of something in his eyes that isn’t necessarily jealously, “We want to see where it goes. I know we’ll only be here a little while longer, but who knows the future, right? What if I see him again?”

Bucky swallows again and clears his throat.

“It wouldn’t feel right doing that to him.”

“Oh.”

“So, uh,” he straightens himself out until he’s standing, and he pulls his shirt down in a sort of fidgety way you almost find adorable if it weren’t for the heartbroken look in his eyes, “you’re gonna date?”

You tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear, feeling a tightness in your chest that you couldn’t bare.

Why did it feel like this?

“Yeah. I deserve someone that will take care of me like that, don’t you think?”

Bucky’s eyes are unreadable at that point. This was what he wanted, right? For you to move on and meet someone better for you?

“You’ll find a guy your age, you don’t want an old thing like me, anyway.”

“You do.” It hurt him to say it. It fucking destroyed him in the goddamn core.

@snakeeatery17 @utterlyhopeful-fics , @marvelfan1017, @iheartsebastianstan , @annathesillyfriend , @redhairedfeistynerd, @perksofbeingabookworm, @amyrose051, @meegggoooo, @morganclaire4 , @captainchrisstan, @bxndys , @shoesonpointe ,  @writerwrites, @rainbowkisses31, @lindatreb , @littlemissner98 , @dezzylou24, @ayeitslelee , @hardygal69 ,  @emmabarnes , @redbarn1995@thequeenreaders@ilovemysupersoldiers@maximumplaidzonknerd@ceapa-mica @s-trawberryv-eins@buckysknifecollections@sobangie@lindatreb@theseuscmander@nervous-plant @wildmoonflower @aya-fay@appreciating-fanfics@kaitlynisinfinite@justreadingfics@kaitieskidmore1 @mrsdancing​ @everythingiloveandcherish @shinykoalacat​ @dragongirl31 @kaitlynisinfinite​ 

#bucky x reader #Bucky Barnes fanfiction #Bucky Barnes smut #bucky barnes #Bucky Barnes x you #Bucky Barnes x y/n #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction #tfatws fanfic #bucky

[wizkiddx]

ohmyword if your doing req can u pls do another fluffy, domestic one bcos honeymoon morning is some i read daily AHAH maybe like the reader gets ill and toms away or something???? pls just anything fluffy

awh thank you for being so sweet abt honeymoon morning - I do think that's one of my favourite concepts ive done!! and I hope this suits what you want, im not so sure myself but I tried :)))

summary: you try to hide being ill from Tom before he leaves but inevitably it doesn't all go to plan

warnings: mentions of being sick, I think that's all - basically just fluff 

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The night hadn’t really gone typically at all. Instead of relishing the last night with Tom for a few months, your body seemed to have different plans. Hence why now you were curled up in a ball on the sofa, staring blankly at the TV, while the washing machine whirred next-door in the utility room and the chemical smell of cleaning products enveloped the downstairs. At least when you were sick, you were a clean sick. 

You were also a quiet sick. You had been pulled from your sleep by the uncomfortable heavy sensation from your stomach barely an hour after you’d both headed to bed. Why was beyond you - what had been important in that moment was to get away from Tom. He was flying back to set tomorrow (or given the early hours currently, lunchtime today was more appropriate) and only had a single day to settle before launching back into filming. So the poor boy was inevitably, given time zones, going to be running on poor quality plane sleep for the next couple of days - you wanted to five him a final night of peace, at least. 

As a result, you’d crept downstairs and since then spent a large chunk of the night making good friends with the downstairs toilet bowl. Once you were absolutely certain there was literally nothing else in your stomach, you chucked some bleach down the loo; then stripped your *stained* pyjamas and chucked them in the washing machine; changed into some freshly washed stuff in the utility (comprising of joggers and one of Tom’s hoodies); before you could curl up in the corner of the sofa. 

And that’s how you’d been for an hour or so. Still feeling grim, unable to fall asleep as much as you were trying to and generally just lying in a ball of self pity. And that was fine… until you heard the unmistakable slow padding of footsteps down the stairs. 

“Love?… -hy’re you up?” His voice was drenched in sleep, making it pull on your heart strings, even before he had rounded the sofa and come into view. Dressed only in his heather grey joggers only, Tom’s curls sat ontop of his head wildly - sticking up at all ridiculous angles. And then there was his puffy eyes, barely open as he slowly processed the sight of you curled up on the sofa. 

“Just couldn’t sleep and didn’t want to keep you up tossing and turning. Why are you up bub?”

“Don’t sleep good without you… you know kicking me and stealing the duvet and stuff.” Never one to maintain a level of seriousness and ‘soppiness’ - it was instantly turned back to the typical relationship of the two of you. While rolling your eyes, you still chuckled at him in the low light of the TV. Tom took the opportunity to perch on the edge of the sofa, sitting so he was grinning loopily down at you. “You fancied putting a wash on too?” 

“...I don’t know just trying to be productive?” He was catching on, he was suspicious. You could tell. His eyebrows furrowed together and he delicately hovered the back of his hand over your forehead, feeling the undeniable heat radiate into his skin. 

“And bleach?”

“Toilet needed doing anyway.” You mumbled, head turning to stare back at the TV- knowing his eyes were piercing into your soul. He sighed, in your peripheries you could see him shaking his head in slight frustration, as his hand reached for yours, giving it a squeeze. 

“You’re ill aren’t you?”

“I’m alright-“ he cut you off with a low warning of your name, making you cower slightly because he’d caught you in a lie. “I threw up a couple times but now I just feel a bit ‘eugh’”. That was, to be fair, a completely truthful description of your evening and current situation. Maybe not put most eloquently but Tom definitely got the messsage, somehow reading your mind by lightly massaging your abdomen with his hand that wasn’t clasped with yours. 

“Come on... let’s get you back to bed.” As much as you wanted to argue with him, it was clear any attempt would be futile. One of things you love so much about Tom is how fiercely protective he is of those dear to him. His circles progressively shrunk as he learnt who he could trust and who ... well he couldn’t. The culling had left a handful of people who were almost central to Tom’s life - somehow you’d managed to wangle your way into these select few too. 

So no, there was not point arguing or suggesting he puts his own welfare first. 

After putting you back int the double bed, Tom had disappeared for 10 minutes or so, when he reinterred the room it was clear he’d been busy. His tongue was stuck out in focus as he tried to balance different mugs and plates on a tray to you. Even if you felt shitty, for a moment by just seeing how far this guy had gone for you - you’d never felt better. 

“Okay there’s some lemsip with honey to settle your stomach, water and a slice of toast just because you should probably see if you can keep something down.”

“You really are the sweetest.”

“And you’re the illest so get drinking love.” He laughed softly in the yellow glow of the bedside lamps that illuminated the room. It highlighted his prominent jaw line and the way his eyes crinkled in the corners and given your slightly off state, you might’ve spent a bit too long ogling at the man cosied up next to you. Never would there be a time you weren’t grateful for him. 

Turns out you couldn’t keep the toast down but the experience was somewhat less horrific - this time you were spilling your guts out into your ensuite, while Tom held your hair and rubbed your back. Eventually things settled, allowing The two of you nestle back into bed, Tom wrapping his arms round your stomach to lightly trace random patterns on the skin underneath your hoodie - as you nestled back into his chest more. 

“I really love you Tom”

“Love you darling, now get some rest and shout if you need anything.” You hummed lightly, almost letting go to sleep now your felt a bit less like your intenpstines were wringing themselves together. But not quite. 

“I’m gonna miss you and your stupid face.”

“We can talk about that when your better” It was as if Tom thought whispering and drawing circles on your stomach was going to deafen you to his words. Yes your stomach wasn’t having a lot of fun and you were tired - but you were not deaf. It was oh so predictable too, he loved to be absolutely ridiculous. Indignantly you huffed, rolling over and eyeing him intently. 

“What’s there to talk about?” 

“Just…. Just if your sick you shouldn’t be on your own. I could always just-“

“No no you couldn’t. You and me both know for a fact you do have a choice and even if you did it be pissing off a hell of a lot of people.” He pouted, you could tell even in the darkness of the night. 

“I hate having to leave you though, especially like this.”

“Yes but you love your work too. I’ll be here when you get back… maybe just with a bit less intestines.” Laughing at that, Tom pulled you onto his chest, pressing his tips to the crown of your head as your burrowed into his side. 

It can’t have taken more than 5 seconds for you to fall asleep, exhausted from the illness, the stupid time in the morning and maybe slightly for dealing with Toms idiocy.  

You were awoken in the morning to Tom stroking your hair gently, all dressed and ready for his flight - but still finding the time to fuss over you and wanting to say a proper goodbye. After practically ordering his to leave… you best believe he dropped in the fact he’d got both Sam and Harry to come round as your babysitter. 

He was an idiot. But he was your kind, caring , beautiful and loving idiot. 

#tom holland #tom holland fluff #tom holland x reader #Tom Holland blurb #Tom Holland angst