#and you have to interrogate your thoughts so much harder than anyone else in order to know their veracity

[neverendingford]

.

#like. people love to be like “deja vu” and dreaming prove that we're hallucinating the world“ as a way to come to grips with the fact #that our reality is based on perception #but it's just a funny “haha” moment because you know that you're perception of reality is consistent. #your have deja vu and immediately recognize it as such. you wake from a convincing dream and go “ahhh. that was a realistic dream” #it's only fun and cool when you can differentiate mindscape from reality. #when you can differentiate what your brain thinks it sees from what your brain sees based on actual external stimuli #otherwise it's just a constant reminder that you have to try twice as hard as everyone else to keep it together #you have to pay attention twice as much to know what really just happened #and you have to interrogate your thoughts so much harder than anyone else in order to know their veracity #anyway I miss when I was up. because I'm currently very much not up #it doesn't feel like depression. so I think mania and depression are very much not the labels I want to even consider using. #it's more like I tighten my bolts periodically and then over time they loosen #but I can't find the wrench. so I walk carefully. I hold onto them when I jump and lean over or reach for things. #I feel loose. falling apart. I'm shoulder surfing myself and the controls are laggy #the A button keeps sticking and both triggers have poor contacts and my left joystick keeps drifting to the right #playable. but so difficult. #I want things to get better again. but they'll get worse after that anyway. I'm so tired of these cycles #tag talk

[royallyjoon]

nephilim (cinq)

you know where the cred goes 💙

cult au, supernatural creature au

yandere bts x f! reader

warnings: yandere themes, physical assault, graphic descriptions of violence, manipulation, (slight) gaslighting

you were left, abandoned by mortals and immortals alike. darkness knows no bounds, and neither does punishment. there is no refuge in neither blood nor flesh from its wrath. if darkness welcomes you, should you open your arms to it in return? if darkness turns you away, does that mean you’ve won? should you choose to cast aside this lonely path of yours, and your conviction along with it, regardless of whatever other horrors lie in wait, you will be saved. 

——————————————————————

What is one to do when they hear the words they’ve feared the most leave someone else’s mouth?

The moment they graced Jin’s eardrums, he gripped his phone so tightly he could hear the glass screen crack. 

He and Yoongi had been assisting their father in the woods with preparations for the next meeting, the ominous hour approaching in no less than ten days.

He ignored Moonsik and Yoongi for a moment to answer his phone. 

“Hello?”

He could barely make out any of Jimin’s words--the boy’s blubbering masked too much of the information.

“Robotics...bathroom...”

“Jimin, I can’t hear anything over the sound of you crying. What’s going on?”

“(Y/N)...rooftop...Aemilia...”

“What are you trying to say?” Yoongi stopped talking to the older man, shifting his gaze toward his elder brother as he noticed Jin’s voice raise in irritation and concern.

“Blood...”

“Blood?!”

——————————————————————

Jimin had walked out of robotics a little early today, bored to tears.

He had felt much better after getting rid of the idiotic gaggle that dared to threaten you, and threaten him into abandoning you.

He should have known it wouldn’t be enough. He should’ve never left your side, he thought as he kneeled on the rooftop, staring forlornly at the pool of partially dried blood on the concrete.

“She was bleeding, hyung. Aemilia or her people must have taken her, but I have no idea where they went.”

Namjoon had been in the middle of a meeting with the school board, representing the student council.

Hoseok had been in the dance studio, barking orders out at somewhat competent underclassmen.

Jungkook and Taehyung were holed up in the younger’s room, playing games rather than doing any actual work.

In short, none of them were prepared. None of them had been there for you as they had promised.

You trusted them when you needed them most, and they left you high and dry.

Jimin felt like he would never be able to get the disappointment and guilt off of his chest.

——————————————————————

Namjoon bounded into the clearing, his usually polished exterior uncharacteristically tarnished. 

Hoseok appeared not long after him, having raced to the woods the moment he received the news.

They were met by Seokjin and Yoongi, who stood with their arms crossed over their chests, near a miserable Jungkook and a pacing Taehyung. Both boys had been in the house, so they were the first to arrive.

Jimin got there last, his hands and uniform pants stained red from the puddle he had kneeled in on the rooftop.

Six pairs of eyes landed on him and his appearance, confirming the worst.

“Three!” Seokjin cried incredulously. “Three of you were on campus, surrounded by a bunch of humans, and not a single one of you managed to keep an eye on her!”

“She could be anywhere,” Jungkook groaned in fear. 

“By all means, please don’t start caring now. It’s too late.” Yoongi snapped at him. “You and Taehyung drove straight home to do absolutely nothing. You could at least have offered her a ride home and ensured that she was safe. You’re just as responsible as they are.”

Jungkook’s eyes grew glassy, but only because he knew his brother was right. 

“As much as you enjoy playing the blame game, we have more pressing matters to address.” Namjoon interjected in an attempt to calm them down.

“That doesn’t even begin to cover it, Namjoon.” Seokjin’s icy tone sent a chill down their backs. “If we really wanted to play the blame game, we would have recognized how this is all your fault.”

The leader stood in tense silence.

“What did I tell you mere hours before this happened?” He continued, walking toward Namjoon until they were face to face. “I told you to get your shit together and to keep that girl in line. Hell, none of this would have happened if we hadn’t followed your idiotic plan in the first place.”

Seokjin was rarely ever angry enough to hiss in his brother’s face. They had all learned a long time ago that to provoke the oldest was to invoke Death.

“We all agreed his plan was the best choice at the time, hyung.” Yoongi cautiously approached the two and lay a hand on Seokjin’s shoulder, leveling a glare of his own at Namjoon. “We can deal with him later. We need to find her first.”

Jimin took the opportunity to step further into the clearing and brandished his phone, the device still open to his messages. “(Y/N) texted me saying Aemilia invited her up to roof and that she assumed it was for a confrontation of some sort.” 

“Aemilia doesn’t have the ability or strength to do damage like that by herself, though.” Taehyung frowned as he gestured to Jimin’s clothes. “Unless...”

The brothers looked at each other in realization and one by one, rushed out the clearing and out the forest. 

A quick drive to the center of the city and one pitifully short interrogation later, their suspicions were settled.

Hoseok growled as he re-entered the van, slamming the car door shut. “How dare he? When did he gain the courage to mobilize our own forces without our knowledge?”

“Never mind Augustus,” Jimin said, although his eyes blazed with anger. “Where would they take her?”

“That dog wouldn’t have taken her to the normal base, she has far too much malicious intent for (Y/N).” Taehyung growled.

Jungkook lightly tapped his fingers on the car door, looking out the window when the thought hit him.

“You don’t think they’d take her to...?”

His brothers looked at him in confusion, but he pointed out the window at the tree line of the woods. 

Having grown up in those woods, they knew it like the back of their hand. 

They knew the places were young townspeople would go to goof off, the places they had claimed for themselves, and the places that were...strictly off-limits.

It didn’t take much longer for the realization to set in.

Once it had, they took off in the direction of the forest.

——————————————————————

In your dream, you once again stood before Ichabod Chapel.

The Chapel, adorned with green vines, had long since been abandoned. Once, the walls must have been a beautiful ivory, but now they were a dark beige, having rotted with time.

A complete opposite to the image of the decrepit church, the seven Kim brothers stood on the ground in front of the entrance, visions dressed in various black silks.

Contrary to its original purpose, the material looked anything but light and airy--in fact, it looked as though it was weighed down or soaked, doused in some unknown substance.

You looked down to see that you were dressed in a white, ceremonial outfit. It billowed out like a ball gown, the sleeves drawing lacy patterns swirling up to your thumb. 

When you looked up, you were stunned by the brilliant, black wings that extended from the backs of the seven men before you. 

The sight of their wings enraptured you, those gorgeous appendages, feathers glossy under the moonlight.

Each of them had their own, unique set, varying in shapes and sizes, though the largest pair of wings belonged to none other than Kim Namjoon, who stood in the center of his brothers, hands in his pocket as he flashed you a familiar, mischievous grin.

Namjoon was the first to step out of the line, casually extending his hand out to you, and you hesitantly raised a dainty, (s/c) hand in return, placing it in his.

He pulled you into his arms and you felt him wrap them around you.

His brothers came to circle around the two of you, eventually joining the hug as well. 

Then, the whispers began.

Their tone was loving, though their words were anything but.

They were desperate, consuming, obsessive, threatening. 

They wanted you to love them, they needed you to love them, why couldn’t you understand? 

Your head pounded, filled to the brim with cruel promises of tenderness and affection.

The substance from their silks seeped into your clothes, rapidly staining your white outfit red.

You realized just what it was that they were doused in and tried to pull away from their arms but they surrounded you, locking you into their hold. 

The harder you fought to get out, the tighter they held on to you until you felt as though you couldn’t breathe.

Things were better this way. There’s nothing they wouldn’t do to protect you.  There’s nothing they wouldn’t do for your love.

How could you scorn their love for you? How could you treat them like this?

 They didn’t want to hurt anyone you cared about. They didn’t want to eliminate everyone you love in order to bring you to their side, but they would if they had to. 

They paid no mind to the way you were drowning in the smell of it, drowning in blood. Was it yours or someone else’s? Was it your mother’s? Mana’s?

All you knew was that they were done playing games.

——————————————————————

Your eyes flashed open and you winced as you immediately wished they hadn’t.

Your head pounded, each thump forcing your eyes shut with the intensity, still not having recovered from the several hits it received. 

For a moment it felt as though you were still unconscious and drenched in darkness, as when you tried to get a glimpse of your surroundings, you only saw shadows and moving, ambiguous shapes. 

The movement of the ground beneath you, however, quickly dispelled such thoughts. 

It appeared as though you were being carried over someone’s shoulder. Despite the extra weight, the person you currently rested on was light and quick on their feet, moving with a speed that made you feel worse than you already were.

The familiar crunching of leaves and branches on the ground made your heart beat just a bit harder. 

According to their footsteps and what you could see of your surroundings, you surmised they had taken you to the forest.

It had been mid afternoon when Aemilia and the people who worked for her and her family accosted you at the roof. Now, there was barely a hint of the moon in your surroundings.

Did she intend to have her people tie you up to the wooden pyre and set you aflame, like some sick imitation of a witch burning at the stake? Or to make it seem as though the Kims had done it?

Despite how afraid of Mayor Kim the citizens were, there was no way everyone would believe you died in such a gaudy display. 

Only the purple fire that Mayor Kim was capable of conjuring left nothing behind, after all. If they were to going to get rid of you by fire, your remains would be found.

There’s no way you could ensure that, however. 

There’s no guarantee that Aemilia wouldn’t be able to make good on her promise and utterly destroy you.

A light cough broke the silence, bringing you back to the present, and you tried to calm your heartbeat. There’s no way your captors would believe you were asleep if you kept scaring yourself like this.

You felt a tight, scratchy material around your wrists and your hands laying against your back.

You successfully clenched your hands. So they hadn’t drugged you while you were out. 

You were hesitant to shift, as you feared your captors would notice your cognizant state, so you resorted yourself to blinking at the ground and gritting your teeth from the pain and nausea. 

Thankfully, the people you were with appeared to be none the wiser. 

“Are we almost there?” A deep voice, seemingly annoyed, huffed.

“Be patient, Lee.” You felt the vibrations of the person carrying you as they replied. “This isn’t just any other job.” 

“I understand, but don’t you think Miss Augustus is going too far?”

Your captor scoffed. “If you want to question the Augustuses, thereby questioning the Kims and their authority, be my guest. I just hope you and your family will be able to deal with the consequences.”

The second captor, Lee, had nothing else to say after that. 

The quiet of the forest left a buzzing in your ears and the swinging sensation your body was making whilst strewn over the person’s back became too much to bear. 

You figured you’d just make your captor angrier if you barfed down their back and tried to shift to draw their attention, but it was too late. 

The acrid taste of bile and what you had for lunch earlier that day reached your mouth and your lifted your head, spitting out as much of it as you could.

There was a yell of anger and disgust, and your captor shoved you off of them and onto the forest floor. 

You held back a shout as you hit the ground, injuring your side even further, and let out the rest of your meal.

“What the-?! This disgusting bitch!”

Your captor launched another kick at your stomach and you fought back tears as they aggravated the wounds already in place. 

Lee stopped them after a while, complaining that another round of beating would just delay their job even further. 

You wiped your mouth off on your shoulder and grimaced.

To your surprise, you found that you could move your legs.

The first captor lifted you to your feet by your collar, and you recognized him as Mr. Byun, the man the strawberry blonde had referred to earlier. 

“Your legs still work for a reason,” he sneered and pushed you forward.

Your legs did indeed work, but were wobbly after hours of no use. 

You tripped and almost fell to the floor again, the bonds around your wrists preventing you from reaching out to break your fall, when the second captor grabbed you by the back of your shirt and held you up. 

“I’m not really in the mood for any of your foolishness, girl.” Lee glowered down at you. “Use your legs properly, or I’ll break them and drag you by the hair. It would be all too easy.”

You heard a suspicious click and your eyes flickered over to Byun, whose hand rested on his waist. In the other, however, he fiddled with a small lever on what appeared to be a firearm.

“Do you understand?” The second captor shook you and your brain protested, rattling around far too much for its liking. 

The thought of escape, which had been curling up inside you like the beginning of a fire, was quickly extinguished. You squeezed your eyes shut and nodded.

He pushed you away from him and you walked, following him with Byun at your back, trying to think of a way out of this situation.

You couldn’t tamper with the ropes around your wrist, as Byun was watching your every move. There was also the gun, and the fact that both men were trained in the use of it as well as martial arts.

Was there truly no way to escape?

——————————————————————

The three of you walked for what felt like hours, reaching a part of the woods that you had never seen before.

Here, the trees were sparse and had already lost all of their leaves. The dark branches coiled and twisted toward the sky, as if reaching for affection that would never be reciprocated. The stumps were old, the ground hard.

And then, a clearing. But not the one you were used to seeing.

Your heart dropped as you walked between two trees, noticing the view beyond them. 

You could now tell that it was well after midnight, for the sun was nowhere to be seen. Nevertheless, as always, the moon was high in the sky. 

Wylynne gazed down on the clearing with a force, as if the moon goddess wanted you to see bright and clear what awaited you.

The crumbling cliff before you overlooked a tranquil lake. Clouds hung in the distance, obscuring what was undoubtedly the outside world.

The outside of Ichabod.

Such tranquility had no business here, you thought to yourself as the pace of your breathing increased. 

Your captors had brought you to Lorne’s Ledge, also known as the edge of no return.

It was forbidden territory for any Ichabodian citizen.

Even before Mayor Kim came to town, even before the Augustus family had their reign: this was one of the oldest, most sacred spots in Ichabod.

The lady of the cliff, Lorne, saw to it that the forsaken never returned home.

You shuddered. The folklore didn’t scare you in the slightest. It would always be the work of man that you detested. 

Yet, you couldn’t help but feel some foreign, oppressive gaze resting on you now that you were here. As if Lorne herself were staring at you, waiting for you to join her in the watery depths--

That familiar click sounded again and your eyes shot to the side. You tried to slowly turn around, but the press of metal against your back forced you to stop all movement.

Lee smirked. “We have arrived at your final destination, my lady.”

“Miss Augustus was generous enough to leave you with two options. You can walk off and take a nice rest in the lake, or you can die before your body ever hits the water.” The man smiled mirthlessly down at you. “Which would you prefer?”

You blinked rapidly, mind racing. Even if you were capable of swimming, with these injuries, you wouldn’t be able to survive the fall off the ledge, 

They truly meant for you to die.

Lee didn’t seem to be in the mood for your deliberation as his cruel smile slipped into an infuriated frown. “Choose.” He growled. “My friend here would be all too happy to make the choice for you. How does a bullet in your brain and being rolled off the cliff sound?”

Byun dug the weapon into your skin and you winced, shaking your head. 

“I’ll-I’ll go. I’ll walk myself.”

Your voice cracked horribly after not speaking for so many hours, but the message was received. 

The metal was removed from your backside and you sighed in relief.

The man in front of you said nothing, simply stepping out of your path. 

You took a couple more breaths and slowly turned to face him. “C-Can I ask you to do something? As a final request.”

He raised an eyebrow at you in response.

You titled your head in the direction of your back. “Can you untie my hands? After I disappear, there might be a search for me, and someone might try to dig through the lake for my body. A suicide will be completely ruled out if they find the ropes.”

There was no way this would work. Even the Augustuses were too intimidated to bother touching the lake for fear of Lorne’s wrath. 

Besides, the police knew when and where to look, and where to say they looked. They would lie to your friends and family through their teeth.

Lee must not have been on the force for very long, however, because he grunted and pulled your hands to him. 

With a slice, the ropes fell to the ground and you clutched your wrists to your chest, nodding partly in thanks and partly in disbelief.

It...worked.

You rubbed your hands together and gently blew on them, fingers numb from the cold breeze. 

Your captors stood together between the trees, blocking the entrance. They murmured quietly to themselves and you continued to morph your face and body expressions into one of a pitiful teenager about to die, concealing the rather reckless thoughts you were having.

You finally turned around and walked back until you were in front of them, catching the two men off guard. They quieted and stared at you, hands at their weapons. 

You met each of them in the eye and bowed, lower than you ever had before, then stood upright.

They looked at you incredulously, giving you just enough time to give Lee a harsh kick between his legs and pry the knife out of his hand.

You slashed at his neck, adrenaline returning full force, and actually managed to cut the man. 

He shouted in pain and brought a hand up to the wound, trying to stop the blood.

Before you could turn to face Byun, however, the loud crack of a gunshot was heard throughout the forest and you felt a painful sting on your hand. 

You yelped as you dropped the knife.

Then, there was a second gunshot and the pain returned full force, this time on your shoulder.

The elder captor, completely fed up with your actions, slammed the gun against your head and you crumpled to the ground. 

You could feel something wet on your hand and clothes, but there was too much of it to be sweat in the midnight chill. You slowly lifted your hand, only to see it covered in a dark liquid.

Byun restrained Lee from attempting to beat you this time, barely casting a glance at your pitiful form. 

“Calm yourself. She won’t be alive for much longer.” He gruffed. “She said she would walk herself, so walk she will. We’re just here to watch and make sure it happens.”

He stood over your form and pointed the gun at your head. “What a useless attempt. Get up.”

Your shoulder and hand burned like hell, but you complied. 

You got to your feet once more and stumbled forward, every step taking you further and further away from the two. 

The barrel of the gun followed your every move.

The tears you’d been struggling to hold back ran full force now at the thought of your imminent death. But rather than let your captors feast upon the sight of your defeated form, you stopped.

You were covered in blood. Your uniform was sullied by your own vomit and dirt. 

But you straightened your back, ignoring the pain in your shoulder, and held your head up high. 

You had reached the edge of the cliff now, but your vision was too blurry to see anything besides the vast blue beneath you. 

The lake that rested below had no warmth or safety to provide for you, but neither did the forest behind you.

You considered praying to Wylynne to see if, in all her majesty and grace, she would save you.

Yet clearly, just like all the people who had come before you, just like the lady of the lake herself, the moon goddess had forsaken you.

You were tired. Too tired to fight against what some would call fate.

You whispered an apology to your mother and Mana, and perhaps even to the brothers, the reason why, you did not know.

Your eyes captured the overcast image of the outside world one last time, then you turned around and took a backward step off the cliff with a sad smile, eyes falling closed, mentally locked on that solitary picture.

Above you, you thought you heard the pained screams and grunts of your captors, sounding as though they were struggling against something or someone. 

But before you, you saw your mother with her arms outstretched, that patient, loving smile on her face. 

You reached forward, wrapped your arms around her, and readily slipped into darkness.

Above your falling form, a shadow zipped through the dawn, racing to reach you before you hit the water. 

He saw you smile and lift an arm into the air, before the smile slipped off your face and your limbs went limp.

The large, black wings at his back beat furiously and he flew faster than he ever had before until he had your beaten form cradled to his chest. 

The two of you suddenly shot upward into the air as your descent slowed, and as the first rays of daylight peeked out from above the clouds, his form hung in the air, almost frozen in time, black wings outstretched and supporting the two of you as he floated above Lorne’s Ledge. 

Kim Jimin hovered, adorned in the light of the early morning sun, peering callously down at the vermin who lay trembling between him and his brothers. 

Or what was left of them, at least.

Jungkook had managed to get his hands on the elder one, and the arm he had been using to carry the gun had been ripped clean off. 

He was now whimpering in excruciating pain, clutching at the place where his limb had once been.

The younger one, on the other hand, lay resting against a tree. 

Unmoving, his eyes unseeing. 

All it had taken was one touch from Hoseok, and the man’s life force was gone, sucked out of him before he could even protest.

He was now nothing more than a lifeless sack of meat.

Taehyung picked up the body as Yoongi kicked one of the elder’s legs to get his attention.

The others stood threateningly over Byun, glowering down at him in utter loathe, as though he were a louse.

The old man whimpered, looking up and between them, then paling in horror as he saw Taehyung and Jimin.

The younger brother walked toward the elder as Jimin gently touched down on the ground, your form still protectively pressed to him. The two Kims met eyes and nodded at each other.

Taehyung turned around and flashed Mr. Byun a crazed smile before flinging Lee’s body as far as he could over the cliff.

He gaped in horror and his voice rose multiple decibels, pleads for his life escaping before he could properly think them through.

Seokjin squatted down until he was at an eye level with him, strong, black wings threateningly displayed. He grinned. 

“If you think you have even any hope of escaping your friend’s fate,” he said as the smile slipped off his face, “you’re dead wrong.”

He glared at Byun with cold, amber irises. “But before we end your insignificant, paltry life, you’re going to tell us who sent you and why.”

They already had proof of Aemilia’s crime from Aloysius Augustus himself but they wanted to be sure.

He looked at the younger gentlemen with tears in his eyes. He fought through his pain and got on both knees.

“There’s no use in begging,” Namjoon stated, arms crossed over his chest. For the first time, he couldn’t find anything amusing in the matter.

“Please! We were only receiving orders, Miss Augustus--”

Before he could finish his sentence, Yoongi used Lee’s discarded knife and slashed it across Byun’s neck, silencing him in an instant. 

The light left his eyes and the man’s body flopped over.

Taehyung didn’t think twice about kicking him off the cliff, either.

Now that those pests were taken care of, the seven rushed to turn their attention on you. 

The bleeding from your shoulder and hand had not slowed in the slightest, and they could hardly feel your pulse.

“We need to get her to the hospital, and fast.” Hoseok said, swallowing the rising lump in his throat.

“I’m the fastest. I can take her there.” Taehyung volunteered.

The brothers agreed, and you were gently deposited into Taehyung’s arms. 

“When you’re sure she’s safe, meet us back here in the woods,” Yoongi said. “You’ll know where to find us.”

"Yes, hyung.” Taehyung spread his wings and took off into the sky.

He carefully cradled you, shifting your body into one of his arms, and attempted to heal some of your worse injuries along the way.

He pressed one hand to your abdomen and began muttering under his breath, a panicked tear slipping out the corner of his eye as he peered at the extent of the damage.

Once your ribs were mostly healed, he pulled his hand away, leaving behind a canvas of dark blue, yellow, and green bruises. He winced and moved on, pressing his hand to your head.

You made no movements, body as limp as ever in his arms. 

Taehyung touched down on the roof of the hospital and tucked those magnificent, black wings together, the appendages fading away as if they were never there. 

He held his arm out, his palm facing the door. He only meant to unlock it, but utterly destroyed it in his haste. Quite frankly, he couldn’t have cared less. 

He hurriedly walked down the stairwell and burst into the hospital’s eleventh floor lobby, reserved for VIP care and treatment. 

A receptionist was working at the front desk, typing away without a care in the world.

He was interrupted by Taehyung’s shouts. “I found her in the woods outside of our home this morning--she’s badly injured, please help!”

He looked up at the boy’s outburst, eyes widening when he realized just who and what he was looking at.

He immediately called for available nurses to bring a bed and admit you to a room, then paged any available doctors.

“Do you know who she is, Mr. Kim?” A nurse asked as she examined you for damage.

He nodded. “She’s a classmate of mine, her name is (Y/N) (L/N). Her mother also works here--please notify her of her daughter’s arrival.”

The man nodded once more, sending someone else to page Nurse (L/N) from the fifth floor.

As the nurses wheeled you away, Taehyung grabbed the receptionist by the wrist and he whipped around in fear.

“This patient is very important,” Taehyung stressed, squeezing the man’s wrist harshly. “She is being admitted under the protection of Kim Moonsik himself, at the behest of our entire family. If anything happens to her...”

The receptionist gulped and nodded. “Of course, Mr. Kim. You don’t need to explain any further. We’ll do our absolute best to ensure her care and recovery.”

Taehyung glared down at him for a bit longer before he threw the man’s wrist aside and turned away from him. 

He rubbed at his wrist, knowing it would bruise in a couple of hours, or perhaps even minutes.

The man returned to his desk, beginning to fill out the paperwork for your stay. 

When he looked up to ask Taehyung more questions about your injuries, the boy had already disappeared.

——————————————————————

In Taehyung’s absence, the six brothers stretched out their wings and flew to a certain section of the woods behind the Kim family home. 

This part of the woods remained untouched by both the Kim family and the general public. It was only the seven who came out here, and only in times of dire consequence. 

Several trees in the area had fallen over, cracked in half as though hit or pushed in anger with some spectacular force.

Leaves and branches strewn all over the ground were blown away by the boys and the sudden breeze they brought, large wings disrupting the peaceful quiet of the forest.

The early morning sun peeked through the leaves, painting a picturesque view of the woods, a sharp contrast to the heavy, violent atmosphere headed its way.

Jungkook planted his feet on the ground first, tucking away his wings until they were out of sight. He angrily flicked what was left of Byun off his face, disgusted by the thick feel and metallic smell of mortal blood. 

Jimin followed right behind him, then Hoseok, Yoongi, and Seokjin entered, Namjoon being the last to touch down on the forest floor.

Jimin and Jungkook met eyes with one another, their anger not even close to subsiding at the death of your captors. 

Yet, soon enough, curiosity and dread brought them out of their rage when they realized just how quiet it had gotten between the older members.

Jimin shifted his gaze, the frown on his face deepening when he saw the eldest brothers’ attention turn to Namjoon, who was standing deathly still, staring blankly ahead.

Seokjin raised an eyebrow as he glared down at the younger. Namjoon refused to meet his gaze.

The six of them stayed like that for a long time, even when they heard the loud beating of another pair of wings, and Taehyung joined them in the forest.

He turned to Jimin in confusion but the older simply shook his head and grabbed for his and Jungkook’s hands, squeezing them. 

Finally, after what felt like hours of silence, Seokjin spoke. 

“There is no mercy for the prideful,” he stated with finality.

Namjoon flinched away at the words, eyes stuck to the ground.

“You weren’t able to uphold your oath, Namjoon ah,” Hoseok said. His words were concerned, but his tone reeked of condescension.

“And because of that, because of your utter failure, our beloved angel got hurt.” Yoongi hissed. “She almost died.”

Hoseok, Yoongi, and Seokjin took menacing steps toward the leader. 

He heard his older brothers walking up to him, but refused to meet the wrath that was surely boiling in their gaze.

Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook watched on with bated breath, their hands still linked together.

Namjoon was frozen in place. 

As the leader of their group, there was rarely ever a moment where he was seen as weak. 

But the second he had received news of your capture, he lost even the strength to stand on his own two feet.

It was the thought of you, of saving you and bringing you to safety, that had kept him going. 

It was the only thing that had kept all seven of them sane.

Now that they knew you were going to live, he knew he couldn’t avoid his punishment any longer.

Namjoon’s facial expression didn’t change, even in the moment where, with surprising speed, Yoongi lashed out at him, decking him in the face and knocking him to the forest floor.

The student body president winced, gingerly gripping his nose as blood started to leak from it.

His older brothers stood, looking down at him in a mock semicircle.

“Yoongi ah,” Seokjin said, turning to the younger, “what is the punishment for those who commit the deadly sin of pride?”

“Being broken on the wheel, hyung.” Yoongi replied impassively. 

“Fortunately for you, or unfortunately, I should say,” Hoseok grinned down at Namjoon, “we don’t have a wheel.”

Seokjin stepped forward and lifted his foot above Namjoon’s right leg. 

“This is what happens when you place too much pride in yourself and in your actions.” He stated, then brought his foot down on Namjoon’s right leg.

He didn’t let up until there was a sick, audible crack. 

Namjoon reeled back, grunting in pain but refusing to scream. 

Yes, it hurt, but he knew he deserved it. He failed (Y/N). 

This is the least he could do to atone for his actions.

“All things considered, we’re being quite generous with you.” Yoongi stepped up next, kicking his broken leg aside to stomp down on his left one.

This time, Namjoon let out a jarring scream. 

“You still have the audacity to scream? To feel pain?” Yoongi ground his foot into the injury as though he were trying to put out a cigarette. “Imagine how much pain our beloved is in right now. Imagine what she wouldn’t have had to go through, had you done your job properly. Had you listened to us.”

The elder had never been kind or considerate when it came to delivering punishment, a fact that the younger brothers had quickly become accustomed to.

Taehyung, Jimin, and Jungkook looked on blankly, but inside they felt a deep sense of pity. 

Namjoon was their brother and their leader, the constant face of their strength.

It hurt to see him in so much pain, no matter how necessary it was. 

Namjoon sat on the forest floor, both legs twisted at an awkward angle. He grit his teeth together as he tried to control his breathing. 

He noticed no one else was approaching him, but he knew that the punishment wasn’t over yet, not so soon. He slowly, inquisitively lifted his head.

The eldest three looked at Namjoon expectedly. He pleadingly raised his eyebrows, but their stares held no mercy.

He bowed his head in defeat. 

The senior wrapped his right hand around his left forearm and squeezed until he heard something crack. 

There was the quick, soft sound of a sob coming out of his mouth, and then all was quiet. 

Hoseok went last, shuffling through the leaves on the forest floor to squat next to his younger brother, wiping away some of his tears and gently running his fingers through his hair. “We’re doing this for her. Everything we do is for her, you know that as well as we do.”

Namjoon glanced at him warily, tense because he knew what was coming next, but didn’t know when to expect it. 

“That’s why you’re prepared to face the consequences for your actions, yes...?”

With a sickeningly sweet smile, Hoseok wrapped his hands around Namjoon’s right forearm, breaking the bone in a quick moment.

Namjoon clenched his teeth together so hard, he swore he heard something else crack. 

Any movement within the top or lower half of his body left him in excruciating pain, and he stifled a scream each time.

“You did so well, Joonie.” Hoseok continued patting his head. 

They surrounded him, praising him with how well he took his punishment. 

He was only able to withstand a few more minutes of cognizant thought before his eyes rolled back into his head.

Hoseok caught his younger brother, gently laying him back onto the dirt.

The six men stood in the silence, staring at the form of their treasured leader with pity. 

Seokjin turned around and met each of his younger brothers in the eye. He then wordlessly walked away from the clearing and Namjoon’s broken body.

Yoongi and Hoseok followed him, blank expressions on their face.

The youngest brothers were all too quick to pick up on the message. 

Overstep your boundaries, and endure the same fate. 

After taking one more look at Namjoon, the youngest brothers trekked out of the forest, silently following behind the other angels.

——————————————————————

When you finally pried your eyes open, you were greeted by an unfamiliar chill.

You were cold. So cold, the chill settled uncomfortably in your bones.

White blankets were tucked around you, pristine sheets morphing to mimic your form. 

For a moment, you incredulously thought that this must have been your arrival to heaven.

Then, you soon heard a monotonous beeping and you felt the subtle prick of wires along your skin, an IV casually grazing across the back of your hand. 

It hurt to move your right shoulder, and your abdomen ached, the areas bandaged so tight you could just barely feel them. 

There were bandages around your wrists and hand as well, and the pungent scent of ointment told you those were for your rope burns and bullet graze. 

Your head injuries were also wrapped, if you deduced the source of your current headache correctly. 

You were alive. Alive, and well taken care of.

“(Y/N)?”

You winced, your head not taking too kindly to the reintroduction of noise. A swivel to your right, however, and your mother’s worried face appeared.

“...Mom?” You voice cracked horribly, and she smiled and hummed in acknowledgement, lifting a water pitcher next to her and pouring you a glass of water.

You drank as if you were Tantalus himself.

“I was so worried.” your mother stated, her voice breaking right along with yours. The sound alone nearly brought tears to your eyes. 

She lifted her hands and grasped your uninjured one, intertwining your fingers.

 “I got paged yesterday morning and asked to come up to the eleventh floor, just to find out that you had been admitted.” Your mother spoke, answering your questions before you even got the chance to ask. “And at the request of the entire Kim family, no less. Kim Taehyung brought you in himself, claiming you’d been assaulted and found outside their door.”

You tilted your head, peering at your mother in disbelief. 

She met your gaze and flicked her eyes toward the door, then back towards you without turning around. You followed their direction.

Outside the small, rectangular window of the door, there stood a tall figure dressed in dark clothing.

Your mother leaned toward you and whispered. “That woman has been standing guard since the doctors finished their checkup.”

You gulped and nodded in understanding.

“(Y/N).” Her tone shifted slightly, still holding concern but taking a solemn turn. “I never ask you questions about how school is and your life is going. We usually leave each other to our own devices, and that’s clearly been a mistake on my part. But I need you to be completely honest with me here.”

“Have you displeased the Kims in any way?” Her grip on your uninjured hand tightened to the point where all of your knuckles turned white. “If they have you here under some sort of watch until the next meeting...if they’re trying to...” 

Your mother gulped, unable to finish the rest of the sentence. 

Her voice lowered into a harsh whisper. “Tell me. I’ll go alert a trustworthy coworker, and I will have you out of this town before Kim Moonsik can utter another prayer.”

Your eyes widened comically. “Mom, no! Nothing like that happened. They saved me. The Kims saved my life.” You repeated, gripping her hands. “If they hadn’t brought me here, I would have-” 

The weight of your words finally hit you, and before you could realize, tears gathered in the corner of your eyes. “I could have...”

You fought to speak through the trembling of your lower lip. “I’m sorry I never told you about my day, I just thought I’d be able to handle it all by myself. The police commissioner’s daughter, she was trying to get rid of me and she-Mom, she-”

Your mother cupped your cheeks as your tears cascaded down your face. She gently rubbed your lower back as you muffled your cries by burying your head into her neck.

She didn’t let you go for a while, even after you managed to collect yourself. 

She poured you another glass of water and you sipped at the beverage, telling her the trials you’d faced these past couple of weeks.

“I thought it was a regular instance of bullying,” you sniffled, putting the plastic cup down. “that she didn’t want me getting too close to her crush. So I endured because I had no intention of taking anything of hers away. Who am I, in Ichabod, compared to a woman of prestige like that?” You sarcastically asked.

“But apparently, my mere existence bothered her.” You shakily recounted what had ultimately been the most terrifying moments of your life to your mother. 

You obscured some parts of the story, not wanting your mother to worry even more, and claimed that the Augustus’ men had taken you to the clearing to scare you and beat you up, and that you surmised they dropped you off outside of the Kim home afterward. 

By the time she finished hearing the whole story, her grip had embedded itself into the edge of the hospital bed. 

Your mother’s vexation was interrupted by the sound of people speaking outside your door.

“Ma’am, I apologize. By the order of Kim Moonsik, only family members are allowed to visit the patient right now.” The figure outside your door spoke with an uninterested tone.

“With all due respect, officer, please don’t assume my gender.” You heard a familiar voice snipe. “My best friend is lying in there and she’s practically a sister to me. I don’t particularly give a damn about your order. Kim Moonsik can kiss my-”

“Mana!” You yelled, trying to catch both of their attention before your best friend could get themselves arrested. 

You flipped the hospital blankets off of you and your mother helped you to your feet, then to the door. The injuries on your abdomen and head protested with every step.

The guard’s eyes widened a bit as you slid the door open, and so did the eyes of every hospital staff within sight of your room. 

“Ms. (L/N), I implore you, please go back to bed to rest!” A nurse in the hallway rushed over. 

The guard hastily nodded in agreement. “Yes, please do. I sincerely apologize for the commotion.”

You waved them off, reaching a hand out to Mana. “I'll go back to bed, but only if you let Mana in. They’re family.”

Mana stood in the hallway, hurriedly dressed in sweatpants, a disheveled oversized hoodie, and sneakers, but gingerly holding a teddy bear with a card.

The guard looked between you, Mana, and the nurse for quite some time. The nurse’s frantic expression must have convinced her, though, because she finally stepped aside.

Mana extended their arm, gently grabbing your hand in return and waltzing past the security guard with a smug expression. 

The moment the three of you were back in the room, however, they ushered you back to bed as well.

“(N/N)!” Mana said, going to hug you, then rethinking it when they spotted all the bandages. 

They placed the teddy bear in your arms and stood a card that cheerily read “Get Well Soon!” on your nightstand. “How are you feeling? I’m so sorry--I should have been there with you!”

“My head and chest hurt, but I’m alright.” You shook your head with a small smile, clutching the doll to your chest. “Don’t apologize, you had no idea this was going to happen. This was all the result of my stupid decision--I was the one who fell into her trap.”

Your mother excused herself, leaving you and Mana alone for a few minutes.

You filled them in on what had happened to you, withholding no details, and their face lit up in anger. “She ordered them to take you to Lorne’s Ledge?! That psychotic cunt! Just wait until I drag her across the square, we’ll see how high and mighty she is then-”

“Mana, calm down.” You smiled, thankful for your friend’s protectiveness, but weary after everything you’d just gone through. 

“I never want to stoop to her level,” you admitted, wringing the sheets in your hands. 

Your mother gently slid open the door, returning with water and a tray of food for you.

“I think...I’ve had enough of mind games and tricks for a while.” You whispered, then smiled at her as she lay the meal in front of you.

Mana’s gaze turned soft, and they patted your hands and back in support. 

“I don’t even want to think of what would have happened if the Kims hadn’t gotten there in time.” your mother muttered. 

You nodded in agreement. 

You weren’t particularly sure how or why, but the Kims had saved your life. 

Not only had they offered you some of the best care in the city, free of charge, but they even stationed people outside your room.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, something told you that holding them with such a mindset would put you exactly where they wanted you to be. 

Yet something else countered that thought, claiming that it was that same distancing mindset that had pushed you into the arms of danger in the first place. 

Perhaps Mayor Kim felt responsible for it because his men got usurped by a high school girl.

Or, perhaps, it was his sons who felt even more responsible.

Your mother and Mana stayed with you the rest of the night, each taking up their own positions on the furniture. Mana draped themself on the couch while your mother took the armchair.

You allowed yourself to drift off to the sound of them breathing, the chill and fear of the previous morning now a distant, foreign thing.

——————————————————————

Your mother and Mana weren’t constantly at your side, as one had to attend to her duties at work and the other had to go to school. 

There were other individuals who were perfectly happy to waste the day with you, though.

On the first day, you were visited by Jimin.

The sophomore’s usual high-energy self was nowhere to be seen as he stepped into your hospital room holding a small bouquet of (your favorite flowers). 

Jimin rushed at you, barely giving himself enough time to greet him before he fell to his knees in front of your hospital bed. 

You gasped aloud in surprise and urged him to stand, but he would have none of it. 

“I’m so sorry, (Y/N).” His eyes glistened as water streaked down his cherubic face. “If I had read your message earlier, if I hadn’t been so stupid to turn my phone off, you never would have gotten hurt like this.”

You winced as you pulled yourself to the edge of the bed, your hand only hurting slightly less than it had before. “You didn’t know at the time, I wouldn’t blame you for that. When you did know, you rushed to help me. That’s something I will be forever grateful to you for.” 

You exhaled and smiled your rare, genuine smile, a warm countenance on your face that pierced Jimin’s soul. “So please,” you held your hand out to Jimin.

The boy looked up, pitiful expression morphing into a delighted smile. He gently took your hand and stood, then ushered you to rest comfortably back at the top of the bed. 

The two of you spent the rest of the day talking, Jimin distracting you from your current situation with stories about his family and their travels. 

By the time you realized you’d never gotten answers to your questions, the sun was starting to set and you were having trouble keeping your eyes open in the middle of Jimin’s conversation.

If the raven haired boy had noticed it, he didn’t say anything. 

If anything, he continued speaking, his voice low and chiming with laughter as he recounted precious memories.

When he heard the familiar sound of your soft, slow breathing, he stopped. He simply gazed upon your visage, smiling at the way your (s/c) skin lit up in the afternoon sun and held a hand up to block the light from getting in your eyes.

He stayed that way for the next several minutes, then gently caressed your cheek, letting his hands linger for shorter than he would have liked.

Once the night was well underway, Jimin collected his things and left your side with one more forlorn look.

He shot a strict gaze at the guard, who gulped and nodded at the unspoken order.

Finally, he turned and walked down the hallway toward the elevators. 

——————————————————————

On the second day, you were visited by Taehyung. You were still asleep when he first came into the room, but your mother was sitting beside you and her eyes widened when she saw him.

Before the younger boy could even speak, the older woman bowed low in gratitude.

Few people had ever seen your mother in a vulnerable state, you included, as she purposefully made it so. 

Taehyung was a rare exception that day as he gently gripped her shoulders, feeling the slight trembles that coursed through her as he straightened her posture. 

Suppressing an amused smile, Taehyung thought of the differences between you and his supposed mother. 

While the actress trembled out of fear for her own life, your mother shook at the thought of losing you.

As expected from the woman who raised you, their perfect treasure.

“I can never repay you for the hospitality you’ve shown my daughter,” your mother whispered.

“There’s no need for such matters, Ms. (L/N). We’ll always protect and watch out for your daughter. We’re honored to have her in our lives.” Taehyung replied with a sincere tone.

She accepted the flowers he brought, carefully laying the bouquet on your nightstand, right next to the vase where Jimin’s flowers lay. 

When you did wake up, you had your own chance to thank Taehyung for finding you and bringing you to safety, along with sponsoring your stay in the hospital. 

He waved away your thanks, claiming that he was simply glad that you had turned to Jimin for assistance so that they were able to know about it.

“You know we’ll always be there for you, right (Y/N)?”

Always.

“Just say the word and we’ll come running.”

We love you.

His heart ached with the weight of the words he couldn’t say.

But you smiled in appreciation and he melted, as it was the smile they had longed to see for so long. The one that you usually reserved for your mother or Mana, the one that they had only gotten glimpses of in the time that they had known you.

He wouldn’t let you do anything for yourself the entire time, claiming you needed to rest up and heal as soon as possible. You reluctantly agreed, enjoying an unusually lazy day.

He played music for you, and soon enough the two of you were lost in a passionate conversation about your favorite artists. Funnily enough, there were several of them who you shared interest in.

Before Taehyung returned home for the day, he insisted on covering you with the blanket as well, tucking it up to your neck and pressing it in at the sides.

Your eyes were closed out of embarrassment as his form hung over yours. 

He fought the urge to bend down and kiss your forehead, for he still feared that he could frighten you away.

Instead, he reached up and switched off the light directly above your bed. With an ambiguous smile, he left, closing the door behind him.

——————————————————————

On the third day, you were visited by Jungkook.

The atmosphere was a little awkward at first, considering how soft-spoken the freshman tended to be around you.

When you tried shifting the conversation by asking him about his personal interests and passions, however, his eyes lit up.

Jungkook demonstrated several different types of punches for you in the room, even helping you weakly set up your form with your still healing hands. 

You learned much more about boxing forms and gaming techniques that day than you could ever remember, but you did leave with plans to have private self-defense lessons with Jungkook after you’d finished healing.

At some point during his visit, you had drifted off and by the time you woke up again, Jungkook was already gone. 

You panicked slightly, worried that he’d be upset and think that you wanted him to leave. As you turned to your phone, however, you noticed a folded piece of paper resting on top of the back of it.

When you opened the paper, you saw a beautiful pen-and-ink sketch of you, lying in your hospital bed and napping. 

Jungkook had somehow taken your messy, disheveled state and turned it into something that evoked a tender feeling within you.

You grinned down at the paper, amazed by his talent. Was this how he saw you? As this...ephemeral, peaceful being?

You gently stood the paper up so that it rested between the two vases that housed Jimin and Taehyung’s flowers, right next to Mana’s card.

The afternoon soon gave way to evening, then evening to night.

——————————————————————

On the fourth day, Seokjin saved you from the monotony of bland, hospital food by bringing you home cooked meals. 

The mere smell of the dishes had your mouth watering. 

He refused to let you do anything yourself, much like Taehyung had the other day. But unlike Taehyung, Jin went so far as to feed you himself.

It was embarrassing, but no matter how much you protested, he wouldn’t let up.

He sat in the chair your mother usually preoccupied and held the utensils out to you, neatly making sure you finished your meals.

At one point, he pretended the food was an airplane and you playfully slapped his arm, resulting in him dissolving into a surprising windshield-wiper-like laugh. 

Jin spent the rest of the day with you, telling you awful jokes that under normal circumstances, you wouldn’t have found that funny. 

His companionship was greatly appreciated, however, and you found that you grew surprisingly fond of his laugh.

Before Jin left for the evening, he gently lifted your hand and placed it in his lap, then revealed another bag he’d brought on his visit.

To your surprise, he clipped a small (silver/gold/rose gold) bracelet around your wrist. The ornament carried two charms: one of a well-detailed moon, the other a pair of angel wings.

You rushed to have him take the bracelet off, hesitant to accept such a valuable gift. 

Yet the look in his eyes pierced right through you, his previous joy still present and glimmering but hidden beneath the depths of something more sinister.

You leaned against your pillows as Jin gently lifted the back of your hand to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to it, just like he had the first night you met. 

“The moment I saw it, I thought of you.” He smiled, affectionately rubbing his thumb over your wrist. “Keep it. For me?”

It wasn’t a request.

——————————————————————

On the fifth day, you were visited by Hoseok and Yoongi.

You were slightly surprised at the fact that they had come together, as their outer attitudes seemed to be opposites, but you found that they complemented each other very well. 

They were extremely considerate of you, allowing you to do things for yourself but offering their assistance should you need it. 

Hoseok spent the day cheering you up by performing routines for you in the little space the room provided.

As strict as he was infamous for being, Hoseok clearly knew his craft. You were mesmerized by his movements and insisted on clapping for each of his performances, your hand healing quite nicely now.

Yoongi delighted you with tales of his rambunctious actions in high school, and some of the best well-kept faculty secrets.

There were several things you learned about Ms. Divii and Mrs. Hargrove that day that you would have been perfectly happy not knowing for the rest of your life, but you giggled and gossiped all the same.

It appeared as though the elder Kim brothers had a similar thought process, as Hoseok and Yoongi each gifted you (silver/gold/rose gold) jewelry similar to what you had received the day prior.

Hoseok looked as though we was going to cry when you went to turn down his gift.

One sharp look from Yoongi later, you closed your mouth, smiled, and expressed your thanks.

Hoseok fondly clipped the necklace onto you, his heart performing somersaults as you leaned into his embrace. 

He silently gulped, overcome by the sudden desire to press his lips to your neck. 

When he made eye contact with Yoongi over your shoulder, his face reddened slightly as the elder smirked at him.

He reigned in the perceptible want in his eyes and leaned back, flashing you his signature smile. “There you are, angel. Pretty as a picture.”

You lowered your head to hide your flush. “You guys really don’t have to bring me these gifts,” you murmured lightly. 

“With a visage as perfect as yours, we simply can’t help ourselves.” Yoongi stated in reply, lifting your ring finger to slide a band onto it. 

How unfortunate it was that it was the right hand instead of the left.

He was able to hide his disappointment from you, but not from Hoseok. 

Nevertheless, there would surely be an opportunity in the near future.

How else would all of those worthless people know that you belonged to them?

——————————————————————

On the sixth day, Namjoon limped his way into your hospital room, a grimace on his face. 

You greeted him with a warm smile that quickly shifted into a worried expression. “Oh goodness, are you alright?”

Namjoon nodded, taking the seat next to your bed. “I injured my leg, it’s nothing serious. I should be perfectly alright soon.”

Seokjin had been kind enough to heal most of his limbs, the elder worried about your reaction to seeing him in such a state. 

They purposefully made him wait in agonizing pain for nearly a week, however, to rub the punishment in, before clearing him to go visit you. 

It seemed as though the student body president had lost his usual self-assured, constantly amused atmosphere. He was strangely quiet, and his body language was similar to that of a man who’d been beaten into submission. 

That was far from the Kim Namjoon you knew.

For several moments, the two of you sat in awkward silence.

The two of you hadn’t been on the best of terms the last time you spoke. Just thinking back to that moment when he’d felt like he was on top of the world, completely in control, made him cringe. 

Then, you turned and smiled at him. “You know, if you really need to, you could always join me as a patient. It’d definitely make the days less boring.”

Namjoon knew you knew there was a change in his attitude, and rather than lording that over him, you simply welcomed him as you usually did.

“I’m so sorry, (Y/N).” The words blurt out before he could stop them.

You shook your head, slightly amused. “What’s with you and Jimin these days? You don’t need to apologize for saving me. Unless you want to, and, well, that’s a completely separate manner--”

“No!” Namjoon lifted his hands up and waved them around. “I just-"

You smiled, entertained by the frantic side of the normally suave, composed teen. “Think nothing of it, Namjoon. You have nothing you need to apologize to me for.”

Your expression darkened slightly as you continued. “If anything, I should apologize for not trusting you all more.”

Namjoon’s lips quivered, desperately wanting to form a victorious smirk, but he settled for an understanding smile.

In the end, he’d been right.

As usual.

“Who remains close to you, who you decide to trust, that’s completely your decision. You should never have to apologize for it.” Namjoon said.

You smiled in acknowledgement, then furrowed your brows in confusion when Namjoon started to dig around in his bag.

“I heard we were gift giving this week.” He pulled out a beautiful, leather bound journal and fountain pen and carefully placed the items on your lap. 

“This is absolutely gorgeous. How did you know I like writing?” You smiled. 

Of course he knew. He knew everything about you.

“I didn’t,” he replied, shrugging with a small smile. “I like to write in journals as a form of catharsis, and thought you might want to try.”

“Thank you so much.” You lifted an arm up and gestured for a one armed hug, one that Namjoon happily accepted.

Clutching the journal to your chest, you gathered the courage to ask him the question that had been running around in your head the past week.

“Namjoon?”

“Yes?”

“How did you guys find me in time?”

The elder clenched his jaw and shifted his gaze aside as if he couldn’t beat to direct his apparent anger and frustration toward you. 

“We heard from Jimin that Aemilia took you and interrogated the police commissioner about any of our private guard’s movements. He fessed and told us that Aemilia told him that I texted her, claiming that there was another soul in need of punishment.” 

Namjoon grit his teeth, vexation rolling off of him in waves as he practically hissed out his words. “He authorized members of our private force to move under her order in order to subdue you.”

Recounting the ridiculous lie that the redhead told her father, and the father’s idiotic tendency to believe her, made his blood hot.

“After we heard that, we rushed to all the places in the forest that the Augustus men might have taken you. Thankfully, we got to Lorne’s Ledge in time and Jimin was able to save you before you could fall off the edge.”

“Are you sure?” You said. “I could have sworn I stepped off...I thought I was a goner.”

Namjoon shook his head. “We definitely got there in time to save you. You sustained several head injuries, so I’d understand if you didn’t see Jimin or blacked out.”

You bit the inside of your cheek, pondering his response for several moments before nodding at his answer. 

There was no way you would ever be able to forget what happened that night.

You knew for a fact that your feet had left the ledge. 

But he was right, you did take several nasty hits from Byun and Lee.

You wanted to keep asking him questions, but the pained, forced look in his eye made you pause on that front.

Perhaps that projection you saw of your mother had actually been Jimin.

You wrung your hands together. 

“What matters now is that you’re safe and sound.” Namjoon gently placed his hand atop yours and gave it a supporting squeeze. “All you need to focus on is getting better. We definitely won’t let them get away with this.”

You nodded again, smiling slightly at Namjoon in thanks for his concern.

——————————————————————

Halfway across town, Aemilia Augustus paced around in her room, practically biting off her perfectly manicured nails in worry.

It had been seven days. 

Seven days of nothing.

Not a single word had come in from Byun or Lee.

When she arrived at school that first day and heard everyone talking about your absence, she felt pure and utter bliss. 

There was no joy like the joy she felt in that moment.

Such euphoria simply couldn’t be replaced.

The only moments that could possibly top it were her future engagement with Kim Namjoon, or the day she would take over her family business.

Because so many days went by without a single peep at your face, she thought her plan was working. 

She felt on top of the world.

But Byun and Lee were two of the most promising soldiers on the squad. There was no reason as to why they were taking so long to get back to her to confirm your measly little death.

As a result, she was starting to panic.

Of course, she had an emergency plan. 

She had no need for it, as there was no way her plan could go wrong, but she always had to be prepared, after all.

Just as she was about to take deep breaths to calm herself down, she jumped at the sound of pounding footsteps and yelps drifting into her room from downstairs.

She heard the annoying cry of her mother and father, and then the sound of several people talking.

A grim chill fell over her.

Unexpectedly, her plan had gone horribly, horribly wrong.

There wasn’t much time left now, as she could hear the footsteps get closer and closer.

To hell with her parents--their capture was inevitable.

Aemilia Augustus would not be captured like a criminal, not as long as she was alive and well.

Aemilia padded over to her bedroom door, shutting it closed as softly as possible and smacking the lights off.

She dove into her walk-in closet and squeezed herself as tightly as possible into a corner, a rack of evening gowns and day dresses covering her.

Every couple of minutes, a door would slam open and she listened, holding a hand over her mouth as the pounding feet searched every room on her floor.

It didn’t take them long to arrive at her room, and she shook as she heard them throw things around.

A rectangle of light shone into the room as someone opened the closet door and Aemilia stilled as though she were encased in ice.

It was silent for a long, dreadful moment. The officer turned their head this way and that, walking into the room and turning on the light to search.

From where Aemilia was hidden, there was no way they would be able to find her. She thanked Wylynne that she hadn’t taken up on her mother’s offer to hire a maid to clean her closet.

The officer turned away to leave and Aemilia cheered in her heart.

After the guards left the premises, she would collect as many valuables as possible from the house and run off to her family’s private home in another part of town. From there, she would plan what to do next.

Her plan wasn’t perfect, but she would be able to get away with it.

Or at least, she thought she would.

Just as the officer was about to close the door, a strong, invisible force yanked Aemilia out from her hiding spot and she came crashing down noisily from behind the evening gowns, taking a few with her.

The officer immediately turned around, beckoning his partner to get her. 

She hurriedly gripped a platform heel and attempted to plunge it in the man’s eye, but he caught her wrist and painfully twisted her arm behind her back.

The redhead screeched in fury and pain. His partner soon joined him, and they dragged her out into her room, each officer tightly holding on to one of her arms.

“What are you doing? Unhand me this instant!” She shrieked, writhing around in an attempt to escape. “Have you forgotten who you take orders from?!”

“No, but it seems as though you have.” 

She paused at the sound of that familiar voice.

Her beloved casually strode into the room in all of his glory, his head held high, that ever present cocky, amused smile that she loved so much on his face.

“Namjoon.” She whimpered. “Namjoon, they’re hurting me.”

The student body president kneeled down in front of her and gently took her chin in his hands.

Her eyes filled with tears and she stuck out her bottom lip, waiting for Namjoon to tell the men to let her go. They better anticipate the earful they were about to receive. How dare they treat their future queen this way?

Namjoon lovingly stroked her cheek with his thumb, wiping away her tear. She nuzzled her cheek into his hand, looking up at him with a pitiful gaze. He smiled at her.

Surely he would save her.

Aemilia closed her eyes, suppressing a victorious smile as she felt Namjoon pull his hand away from her face.

But rather than the sound of him barking orders, she was met with the sound of a harsh slap.

Her eyes flew open in shock.

Her face stung.

“Nam..joon...?” She whispered, stupefied.

The senior was sneering down at her, pulling a handkerchief out the square pocket of his jacket and wiping his hand on it.

“What disgusting thoughts you have,” the man spat, dropping the handkerchief in another subordinate’s hand. 

“Burn that.” He commanded.

Aemilia simply stared up at him in disbelief. 

Had he...hit her?

“Namjoon, why are you doing this?” Her voice trembled. “You’d never hit me, you’re my...we’re-”

“Nothing.” Namjoon interrupted with a disinterested gaze. “I am not your anything. I’ve never given you any inclination that could lead you to assume that I loved you, or liked you, or cared for you in the slightest.”

Aemilia dropped to her knees in incredulity. 

“That’s not true! You cared for me, I know you did! Ever since that (h/c) haired bitch appeared, you’ve turned away from me!” She screeched, her shrill voice piercing their ears. “I should’ve gotten rid of her sooner!”

As soon as the words left her mouth, all the air in Aemilia’s lungs disappeared. She heaved her chest, trying to breath, but found herself unable to.

He squatted down to face her.

“Let’s get one thing absolutely clear.” Namjoon spoke in a frighteningly low tone. “I never cared for you. You were nothing more than a useful little pawn in my game. A pawn who somehow tricked herself into believing she could become a queen.”

Her face turned redder and redder from anger, embarrassment, and the lack of oxygen.

“(Y/N) is more of a queen than you could ever be,” Namjoon stated, smiling at the memory of you sitting up in your hospital bed, grinning at him, the sun forming a halo behind your head. “She’s an angel. Our precious everything.”

He turned his gaze back to the creature before him. “She isn’t someone the likes of you can ever attempt to touch, much less harm or overthrow.”

Namjoon straightened, moving to walk towards the entrance to her room. “That’s my fault, I’m afraid. After all, I wasn’t able to properly regulate my inferiors.”

Black dots swam at the edge of Aemilia’s vision. She kept her eyes locked on Namjoon, still praying that this was all a prank or a joke, and that he would comfort her by sweeping her up into his arms.

“You truly have no idea what’s going to happen to you, do you?” He chuckled with a mirthless smile. “Don’t worry. We’ll fix that soon enough.”

Finally, her body gave in and shut down from the lack of oxygen. The redhead flopped over on her side, Namjoon’s cruel glare burned into the backs of her eyes.

——————————————————————

On the morning of the seventh day, you took advantage of your solitude by pondering the events of this week and the rather complicated emotions that came with them. 

Despite their reputation and despite your fears, you had grown closer to the Kims over the past month. 

They never threatened or harmed you or the people you cared about. They had welcomed you into their lives with open arms. 

You had kept them at an arms length in an effort to protect yourself and your loved ones. But what had distancing yourself from them gained you?

Still, there was no way your method could be wrong. It was your livelihood, your path to survival in Ichabod. 

There were rules here, rules that couldn’t be broken. 

Yet the majority of those rules had been broken the moment you invited Jimin to sit with you at lunch.

Was it even possible that an alternative path to salvation freedom existed?

Had the Kims truly provided another way? 

Your mother went around the room collecting and packing up your things for you as Mana helped you change in the bathroom, making sure to be careful of your still-healing shoulder.

When they left to fetch your discharge papers, you sat at the edge of the hospital bed and deliberated what could potentially be one of the most important decisions of your life.——————————————————————

i am so, so, so sorry for taking longer than usual to post! college and midterm season caught up with me--i’ll try not to let assignments interfere with my writing schedule in the future ;-;-; thank you so much for sticking with me through the wait! the long awaited day has finally come! revenge has never been so sweet hehe. also, the way that i have no idea how to write fight scenes--pfft. i hope you all enjoy the chapter <33

~taglist~

@melaninkpops @loserwithapen @hellaspookystudent @ecillartto @omgsuperstarg @ace-angel-judas @jjamsbangtan @lovinggalaxies @lovesick-heart0 @ksxmpoison @girlmeetsliv3 @thedarkwinterrose @purpuravm @oneweirdbean @hopelessfountainjoonie @mazmaz30 @enigmaticlove-03 @uppiespuppy @queenceline22 @kokofikats @taeyohonic @creatorspalace @supertweetycherry @anachikartadze @itsfeliciatime 

#yandere x reader #yandere bts x reader #yandere jung hoseok #Yandere jeon jungkook #yandere kim namjoon #yandere kim seokjin #yandere kim taehyung #yandere park jimin #yandere min yoongi #yandere bts au #high school au #bts cult au #supernatural creature au

[reidgraygubler]

the threat is gone (spencer reid/reader)

Title: the threat is gone

Requested: yes, was a request someone sent to @imagining-in-the-margins, but I took it off her hands :) (Reader is being threatened by an unsub and is given safety instructions by reid that she disobeys out of boredom, so when the threat is over she tries to joke/lie/argue her way out of trouble but he’s in total dead serious fbi interrogation mode and calmly hauls her over his lap and doesnt stop til she’s crying hard and has told him everything and then he comforts her n from there whatever)

Couple: spencer reid/fem!reader 

Category: angst, slight smut (either way, minors dni)

Content Warning: swearing, dishonesty, being spanked (to the point of tears), aftercare, D/s dynamic, reader being a brat, usual criminal minds case stuff, post prison & post series!reid, implied age gap (10 years),  use of a safeword

Word Count:  3,901

Summary:  Spencer sends Reader to a safe house after she’s threatened by an unsub. Reader decides to take her fate in her own hands and leave the safety. When Spencer finds out what she did, there’s hell to pay

A/N: happy easter to those who celebrate! pom (aka @imagining-in-the-margins​ )posted this in her discord and said if someone had any ideas for this, we could have it. and i loved the request so i took it off her hands. also thank you to @newportonmymind for beta reading this for me!! thank you all so much for the support! i really do appreciate it. check out my masterlist!

{***}{***}{***}

“Anderson and a cop are going to take you to a safe house,” Spencer looked down at me. I shifted on my feet as I looked up at him. My heart was in my throat. I didn’t think this unsub was that bad. 

“I’m not going to a safe house, Spencer. Being here is probably the safest place I could be. By your side… With the team,” I stepped up to him as I grabbed his hands. He looked down at me, a certain frustration in his eyes. 

“His victims are too much like you. We’re not taking that chance, I’m not taking that chance. Do you understand?” Spencer’s voice was low as he spoke. I swallowed roughly as he placed his hands on my shoulders.

“Yeah, yeah, fine, I understand,” I scoffed and shrugged his hands off my body. Spencer looked at me, watching as I collected my belongings. 

“Please, just trust me,” his voice was soft. I looked up at him, putting my bag across my body. 

“Yeah, of course, Spence, I trust you, wholeheartedly,” I smiled at him. He didn’t believe me. Granted, I didn’t exactly believe myself either. Why would I? I’m being snappy and sarcastic, and dismissive to everything he said. “I’ll be safe. Anderson and a random cop will be with me. Do not worry,” I went up to him before pressing my lips to his. 

“It won’t be for long. We’ll be back home before you even know it,” Spencer smiled, resting his hands on my hips before kissing me again. “You’ll listen to me and Anderson, understand,” he kept his tone soft and quiet, but still held authority.

“Yeah, yeah! My life is now in his hands. I wholeheartedly trust you and Anderson,” I whispered as I kept my eyes on him. He looked down at me, his honey-like hazel eyes watching every detail on my face. Part of me wondered why he stared at me the way he did. Was he memorizing every little detail of my face, just in case something happened to me?  Nothing will happen to me, that’s the whole reason why he’s having me go to a safe house with Anderson. 

“I love you,” his voice wavered slightly with his words. It was clear he was trying to not let his emotions show, but was also obviously losing. 

“I love you too,” I smiled before pressing his lips to mine for the briefest moment.

“Sorry to interrupt,” a voice came from the doorway, forcing Spencer and I to part. I swallowed roughly before turning to look at the door, seeing Anderson leaning against the doorframe. “But we’re ready to go,” he looked between Spencer and me.

“I’ll see you soon,” Spencer lifted his hand to my face, gently holding my cheek in his large palm. I swallowed roughly and nodded. “And don’t forget your promise. Follow your orders, and be a good girl,” he whispered the last part so only I would hear it.

“Ye-yeah, yeah… We’ll see you soon,” I repeated what he said before kissing him one last time. As much as I didn’t want to, I stepped away from Spencer’s body and followed closely behind Anderson. The cop that was behind us held a jacket over my body to hide my identity and keep me hidden from anyone unsub. 

“We’re going to stop at your place before we go to the safehouse, so you can get some clothes, toiletries and other belongings,” Anderson looked over at me once we got settled in the car. I glanced over at him and nodded.

“Yeah, okay,” I swallowed roughly and nodded, “Will we be able to stop at a store too?” 

“Everything you should need, food and entertainment, should be at the safehouse when we arrive,” Anderson backhandedly answered my question. I furrowed my eyebrows as I stared at him.

The rest of the drive to the apartment was tense and silent. It was almost like we were in a library. Any sound or comment that was made, any breath that was breathed, felt wrong and I should be executed for it. But, that would kind of defeat the purpose of me going to this safehouse, right?

“Be quick, we only have a few minutes. We have to be on the road before dark,” Anderson looked at me as we both walked up the steps to the apartment complex. I glanced over at him and nodded lightly.

“Will do,” I nodded as I pulled out the keys and unlocked the building’s door. Anderson stayed standing outside the building, by the door, as I went inside.

The apartment that I shared with Spencer was a mess, but to be fair it was mostly Spencer’s mess. Books, papers and files scattered over any surface. And if there was an exposed surface, it was occupied by a coffee cup. At the office and on the road, Spencer is neat and organized, but at home, when his walls come down and once he’s in the zone, the organization goes out the window. Teaching tended to take a back seat; the papers that littered the room (and office and bedroom) consisted of papers he has/is supposed to grade.

I think the only organized room was our bedroom. Even though no one else ever entered that room, he always had it pristine. He knew where everything was, and if one thing was out of place or out of line, he’d know in an instant. We had come to a shared agreement that the bedroom was for bedroom activities only. If we could keep work stuff out of our room, we would. Our room was the only truly the only place we had control, hence the cleanliness and order of it.

I was quiet as I grabbed my backpack. Shoving my clothes into it, I muttered strings of profanities. Spending time in stupid safe house sounded like pure hell, absoulte boredom. Why would he think I would be okay at a safehouse? I could be useful at the office, and safer too. What’s safer than being with the team, not to mention with Spencer?

With a deep and resigned sigh, I threw the straps of my backpack over my shoulders. Anything to make Spencer happy, I suppose. I was a brat, but this didn’t seem like something to fight him on. 

I quietly exited my home and went back outside, where Anderson was still waiting. 

“Ready,” I looked over at him, feeling a fake smile grow across my lips. Anderson looked at me and nodded before taking the lead back to the cop car. I looked over at him and nodded as the car finally jerked forward and took off. 

If I thought the drive to the apartment was bad… The drive to the safehouse was worse. If I had known it was going to be a 1 hour drive, I would have fought harder. This time around, I could sense that Anderson was trying to make some sort of an effort to make me feel better about this situation. But it was clear it was a fail of an attempt too. He kept talking about the things he enjoyed rather than common interest, or small talk. Yes, Spencer could do the same, but at least his factoids were adorable or at least relevant.

I almost felt bad, because I had honestly stopped listening to everything he said. I’m not sure when I stopped listening, sometime around the time he started talking about baseball. I take back what I said about Spencer, this was far worse. I swear, I actually liked listening to Spencer ramble on and on when he info dumps. But Anderson… 

“Anderson,” I looked over at him, cutting him off as he spoke, “Please… For the love of God… I know you love baseball… But you have got to stop talking for five fucking minutes,” I took a deep breath as I stared at him. He looked back at me before closing his mouth and nodding. 

Thankfully, the rest of the drive was silent. I almost couldn’t believe how quiet it was. And, I almost couldn’t think of a time where it was silent for such a long period of time. I suppose in the moment I was thankful that things were turning out the way they were.

“Here’s your bedroom,” Anderson spoke cooly as we walked past a room. I looked over at him, feeling my exhaustion spread through my body. “Rest all you want. There’s some books that Spencer sent over that you could read. As well as movies you could watch,” he looked over at me. I looked back at him and nodded.

“I think I’ll do that… Everything that’s happened today… I’m exhausted,” I laughed nervously as I entered the room. Anderson looked at me and nodded, watching as I closed the door. I pressed my back to the door once it was shut, clicking it locked with a sigh. 

My eyes scanned across the bland room. It consisted of a bed, a night stand, a lamp, and a window. Of course, all safe houses are basically empty homes. Fake houses that looked lived in, when in reality they were nothing.

But then I looked back at the window… We were only an hour away from the apartment… Surely I could...

“Like hell I’m going stay in this stupid safe-house with Anderson,” I scoffed before rushing over to the window. I threw it open so fast I was worried I’d broken it. I didn’t have every step of my escape planned out, but I knew I had to get out of here. I knew I could think on my feet, so the spontaneity didn’t faze me.

I had to be quick as I had to make sure that Anderson didn’t clue into what I was doing. Because the second he knew that I wasn’t in the the safe house anymore, was the second Spencer knew, and then I’d be in big trouble -- worse than if the unsub were to catch me. 

“Okay, okay,” I whispered as I patted down my pockets, feeling for my phone and wallet, trusting that everything else that I needed would be in my bags. I’d be back by the end of this case. I wasn’t exactly running away, I was just getting away because this was stupid. The safest place I would have been in was with Spencer and the rest of the team. I knew that, and I knew Spencer just needed reminding that I was right.  

‘I wasn’t running away,’ I thought to myself as I looked out the window. It wasn’t a far jump. 3 yards at least. I wouldn’t get hurt by that, should I? 

I glanced over my shoulder, just making sure no one was watching me, before finally jumping out the window. I grunted when I landed on the ground. Then, I was off.

There was a coffee shop not far from the house. That was my destination. And then from there, I’d get an uber or taxi back home, or shopping, or someplace else. As long as I was away from danger, I was okay. 

I could feel a certain anxiety grow up my throat the further I got from the safe house. It wasn’t because I was afraid that I was going to get hurt. It was because of Spencer. I just wasn’t sure how he’d take to that news -- but I could take an educated guess. It was honestly a matter of time before I go-

Spencer Calling…

I stared at the screen, looking at the picture of Spencer and I at one of Rossi’s fabulous parties. I swallowed back my fear and anxiety, and took a deep breath of courage before pressing answer.

“Hel-”

“Where the hell are you!?” Spencer growled as his voice came through the speaker. Fear… Fear grew in the pit of my stomach, and it was hard to breathe. “I swear to God,”

“I’m fine! I’m safe…” I returned as my steps slowed on the sidewalk. I didn’t totally answer his question. I didn’t really want to tell him I was at a coffee shop 5 minutes away from the safe house. Because then he’d have Anderson on my ass in a second. 

“That doesn’t answer my question, and you know that,” Spencer snapped back. I froze in my tracks, my heart beating harder than I could control. “Where are you? Make me ask again and I won’t be nice,” 

“Spencer,” I started, my voice low and shaky, “I can’t tell you,” I shook my head. I could hear the breath of air that Spencer let out, and it only scared me more.

“If you’re not back at that safe house in 20 minutes, you will have the biggest punishment. Do you understand, Princess?” 

“I’ll be safe, Spencer,” I muttered. I stared at the ground for a long time as we both stayed silent. It was hard to say how long passed, but it was a while. “Bye Spencer,”

“If you hang up, I swear,” he started but I didn’t get to feel the end of it before I hung up. I swallowed roughly before continuing my trek towards the coffee shop as my phone buzzed continuously.

{***}{***}{***}

“Where were you again?” Spencer asked, just to ask. He didn’t forget. The man he is? He’d never forget. Especially something like this.

“Coffee shop and Library, I thought you would just have Garcia track me.” I mumbled as I waited for him to unlock the door. My stomach was slowly churning the longer he took to unlock the door. Although, I was okay with how slow he was. The slower he took, the longer I had before the punishment.

Spencer huffed out a breath of air and shook his head. I stared at him, watching as the door finally unlocked and was pushed open.

“Do you have any idea how irresponsible that was?! How… How much danger you were in?!” Spencer shouted as we both entered the apartment. I glanced at him as I made my way to the couch.

"C'mon, I was probably safer at the library and coffee shop anyways! Bastard knew I’d go to a safe house and our apartment," I shrugged as I flopped onto the couch. Spencer looked down at me like he was the parent reprimanding their disobedient child. Granted, that’s kind of how our dynamic was when we weren’t at work or it was a normal day. I do have to admit though, I was wrong for not going where he wanted me to.

"You directly disobeyed me. Do you have any idea how dangerous that was?! How could you be so reckless!? You have no idea how scared I was when I heard you weren’t at the safe house,” he shouted, but as he got closer to the end of his sentence, his words got quieter and his voice cracked. I looked up at him, the feeling of guilt suddenly eating away in my stomach. 

“I’m sorry… I don’t know what else you want me to say or do, Spencer…” I muttered before shrugging. I glanced at him as he stood on the other side of the coffee table. He rolled the sleeves of his shirt, quietly muttering something as he went. “Spencer, look, I said I’m sorry… I’m home and I’m safe…” I watched him with anxiety bubbling in my stomach.

"You disobeyed me, put yourself in danger,," his voice was low as he stood up. I watched as he walked over. The hairs on the back of my neck were instantly standing, and I could feel goosebumps grow all over my arms. “Sorry just isn’t going to cut it,” he looked down at me. I looked up at him, and I knew exactly what he was about to do. So my next question was redundant.

"Wh-what are you doing?" I looked up at him. My heart was suddenly in my stomach as he lowered to my height. I tried to look anywhere but him, but that was hard when he placed his finger under my chin, coaxing me to look at him. I tried my hardest to not look up at him, but it was so hard to not look at him. He was right there and he was my favorite person to look at. But, to be fair, when he was mad it made me a little nervous.

"Well, you decided to go and break my instruction. And you know what happens to little girls who disobey their rules," he kept his voice low as he spoke. I dropped my gaze to my lap as he sat beside me. A shiver shot down my spine as I locked eyes with him… In that moment, I knew I was done for...  

"Wait, Spencer," I exclaimed as he grabbed me by the waist and pulled me so I was lying across his lap. I lifted my head and looked up at him with wide eyes “Spencer! Spencer! Wait! Please!” I struggled as I squirmed in his lap. I wanted so badly to just slide out of his arms, but the way he held me made it damn near impossible to slide away from him.

“I’ve asked for an explanation and you didn’t provide one,” he spoke cooly. He kept his hands on my back, and not going any lower than my hips. I took a moment, struggling to breathe as I thought of why I left the safe house and Anderson. 

“I was just bored, okay? I was bored. And thought it was stupid that you had me leave the office and the team to go to a safe house,” I tried to wiggle from his grip again, but failed when his hold on me tightened. I swallowed roughly, hoping my truth telling would work, but I had a feeling it wouldn’t.

“Is this the truth?” Spencer asked, his tone somewhat overly nice. I bit my lips together and nodded lightly.

“It’s the truth, I swear, Spencer, it’s the truth,” I whispered. I knew telling the truth would lessen the harshness of his punishment. And, maybe it would. He does know when to be gentle.

“I’m happy you gave me the truth. But that still doesn’t mean it was okay to disobey me, you know that, don’t you Princess?” he whispered as he brushed down my hair. I let out a deep sigh before reluctantly nodding. 

“I know,” It was inevitable at this point. I owned up to my mistake, and now I need to own up to the punishment. And I knew exactly what was going to happen. 

“I’ll go easy on you, okay?” He kept his voice low. He knew if his voice was any louder, I’d instantly back away from all of this. “I think ten strikes is appropriate... Do you agree?” 

I would rather have less, and Spencer knew that too.  But if I argued he’d only add more. Which was worse than the ten he already offered. I knew that after he’d be okay and it’d be over with.  Fuck, I already wanted it to be over.

“Yes, sir,” I sighed deeply. I lifted my hips enough for him to pull my pants down over my bottom. My chest tightened as I tried to take a deep, shaky breath as I anticipated the first strike. 

My ears could just barely pick up the soft rush of air from Spencer’s hand before it landed hard against my bottom. I took a sharp breath of air and dropped my head down to the cushion.

“One…” I whispered as my hands gripped his pants tightly. I swallowed roughly as I tried to steady my breathing. Spencer gave me a moment to breathe before giving me two and three in a quick go. Four came after a brief moment. But then… Five was when it started getting shaky for me. Tears had started rolling on my face between three and four, but it didn’t start becoming trouble till five.

“Five! I understand! I swear! I’m sorry!” I cried out once his hand connected hard with my ass for the 5th time. And, okay, that one hurt, like a lot. I couldn’t tell if it was the sting that hurt, or the repeated assault on the sore spot… But I knew it hurt. With each strike, I could almost feel Spencer’s anger and anxiety. I definitely felt bad about doing what I did.

I don’t know if I’ll make it to ten...

“Just five more,” Spencer spoke softly as his hand carefully massaged my butt-cheek. I could tell he started feeling bad. But, we both knew he had to follow through with it. 

His hand whizzed through the air and smacked against my ass. A loud crack came through the air, and a sharp gasp fell from my lips. And, that was it. I definitely don’t think I’ll make it to ten. This was it. 

“Buttercup!” I shouted as my eyes snapped open. I could still feel the tears burning down my cheeks. Before Spencer could make contact for the 7th time, he stopped. He kept both his hands away from my body as I moved away from him. With that, we were both silent for a minute, as I tried to recalibrate my breathing. 

Spencer looked over at me, sensing his sudden change in demeanor. His anger and anxiety was gone and replaced with a guilty panic. The atmosphere changed.

“Are you okay?” Spencer asked after a minute had passed. I was, painfully, sitting on the next cushion away from him. I needed my space. I bit my lips and nodded as I roughly wiped my cheeks. 

“I’m okay,” I whispered looking back at him. I watched as he slowly lifted his hands, offering both of them for me to hold. I stared at them for a while before just falling into his sigh, a shaky breath, almost a sob, going through my body.

“I got you; you’re ok, you’re safe. I was so worried. You have to understand how dangerous it was for you to just leave like that. I thought I was never going to see you again,” Spencer whispered, bringing a hand to run over my hair. I bit my lips and nodded.

“No, I know… I’m sorry for… I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you. I don’t even know… I should have just stayed at the safe house,” I whispered as I pressed my face into his shoulder. I felt as he let out a deep sigh and wrapped his arms around me, resting and hand on my lower back. 

I was happy he didn’t mention how I told him the truth a little bit ago. My body could feel the exhaustion from the whole day. It wasn’t just the punishment, or the little bit of arguing, or even the running away. It was everything combined. I needed sleep soon. Spencer knew that too.

“Why don’t we go into our room and cuddle,” he whispered as he continued stroking my hair. I sniffled lightly before laughing. Just like he was reading my mind. He knows me better than anyone. “I just want you safe in my arms.”

“Yeah, yeah, I think I’d like that a lot, actually,” I looked up at him. Spencer smiled at me before lightly pressing his lips to mine. 

if you want to be a part of a taglst or have any comments about this one shot, let me know here

taglist: @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto, @thebluetint

#shadow writes stuff #masterlist #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fan fic #criminal minds fan fic

[littlemisspascal]

Death and an Angel part 9

Helmetless + Death!Din x Cupid F!Reader

Summary:  You make a promise to Din before you leave to meet with your superiors, but will you be able to keep it?

Rating: T

Word Count: 2,976

Warnings: fluff, the angst is back people, protective and possessive Din, your superiors are assholes, overuse of italics, swearing, plot plot plot

Author Note: All the love to every single supporter out there! Don’t hate me too much for this segment please.

Links to Part 1 and Part 8 and Part 10

Cross-posted on AO3.

Photo Inspiration:

“I’m going with you, angel.”

In exactly one hour, you’re due to report back to headquarters. You’ve been loathing this meeting from the get-go, but now, after being matched with Din, the mere thought of leaving him is as painful as a physical blow. You wish you had more time to revel in his heated kisses, the touch of his hands against your skin, the low growls he elicits when you run your nails through his curls.

Deep down, you know as immortal beings you will have an eternity to experience all of these thrills together. But right now the bond you two share as soulmates doesn’t care about the future, only the present. In your mind, it resembles a sapling soaking up every ounce of affection it can from you and Din, craving more and more intimacy in order to become stronger. Just thinking about being separated from him, even for only a short while, makes your chest hurt something fierce, as if a bundle of thorns has become wrapped around your heart.

Din is not immune to the effects of the soulmate bond either. Since his return to Arvala-7 he has not let you out of his sight for longer than thirty seconds. Anyone else, you would have been annoyed by the incessant staring, but with Din you only feel desired and, as sappy as it sounds, cherished in a way you’ve never felt before.

Which makes it all the harder to meet his gaze right now, frowning as you shake your head at him.

“Din, you can’t,” you say quietly, praying your voice doesn’t break because you know it will trigger his overprotectiveness and then you’ll helplessly melt into a puddle of warm emotions. “Only Cupids are allowed at headquarters. No outsiders allowed, not even Death.”

His jaw clenches, displeased by your rebuttal, but his fingers are gentle as they trail across your cheeks. That’s another thing you’ve noticed since he’s reunited with you: his gloves have yet to make a reappearance. It’s like now that you and the universe have assured him of your requited feelings, his iron walls of self-control have crumbled to dust, revealing a lonely, touch-starved soul who has long been told he could never physically connect with someone without the risk of killing them and is now desperate to make up for the lost time.

With this in mind, each time he initiates contact, you always make sure to return the gesture with as much affection as you can muster, whether that be by deepening his kisses or by intertwining your fingers tightly with his when he reaches for your hand. Or, such as in this instance where the two of you are lying together and cuddling on Kuiil’s bed, you take advantage of him having removed his full suit of armor to curl closer against his chest, nuzzling your head beneath his chin.

The Ugnaught had taken Din’s return in stride when he and IG-11 had paused their farmwork outside to check up on you about twenty minutes ago. Upon seeing them, Din had started to untangle himself from you so he could stand to greet them. His lack of urgency to conceal his face surprised you initially, but then you recalled Kuiil already knew Din resembled a human male, meaning at some point during their friendship Din had become comfortable enough to not wear his helmet around him. Petty jealousy swirls inside of you, upset you’re not the only one who knows Death’s true face, but you squash the ridiculous emotion not even a second later. If anyone is worthy enough of seeing Din’s true self, it’s Kuiil.

Before Din could get to his feet, Kuiil had merely shaken his head, saying he didn’t want to interrupt your time together when he knew you had to leave soon. Which is what prompted Din to insist upon himself accompanying you to headquarters.

“I don’t want you anywhere near those bastards,” he mutters darkly, lines of frustration forming ridges along his forehead. He still hasn't forgiven Hess for causing you to have a panic attack.

You wrap your fingers around his wrist, not with the intention of stopping his soothing ministrations, but instead grounding yourself in the moment using the skin-on-skin contact. Perhaps, you acknowledge privately to yourself, he’s not the only touch-starved soul in the room. I don’t want to be near them either, you want to tell him. Let’s fly away together on the Crest, somewhere far, far away...

Instead, you force yourself to say with the same carefully even tone, “The meeting should just be an hour or two, then they’ll make me take a reassessment test about Cupid regulations which I’ll pass easily.” You lift your head to peck the bridge of his prominent nose before holding up your pinky finger. “And by later this evening, I’ll be right back here in your arms. Pinky promise.”

Din stares at you for several heartbeats, stubbornness lingering in his gaze before at last he exhales a quiet sigh of surrender. He wraps his pinky around yours, squeezing tightly.

“I thought leaving you behind here was the hardest thing I’d ever have to do, but this—letting you go face them alone and knowing I can’t intervene—it’s a pain I’d only wish upon my worst enemies.”

You want to say something lighthearted, a teasing remark to ease the heavy tension in the room and make that stunning smile of his light up the space instead. Maybe, if you’re funny enough, you can make his precious and lone dimple appear in his cheek so you can press your lips to it. But your words get trapped in your throat, forming a lump that won’t go down no matter how hard you swallow.

You are equally as surprised as you are grateful when Din continues to speak.

“You’re my soulmate, angel, so when I swear these next words to you, I want you to have no doubt I mean them with absolute sincerity,” he says, a possessive and darkly seductive note creeping into his voice that has you instinctively biting your lip to keep yourself from moaning embarrassingly. “If anyone dares to keep you from me even a second longer than what is strictly necessary, I will stain the ground with their blood and reap their soul from their body so slowly they’ll weep for damnation.”

~~~

Headquarters is kriffing freezing.

That’s the first thing you notice when you step inside, goosebumps immediately rising along your arms and a shiver racks your spine as you navigate the maze of hallways towards the center of the building where the conference room is located. Every footstep reverberates off the black marble floors, but the sound isn’t loud enough to prevent you from overhearing the whispering voices of other Cupids watching you pass by, gossiping about your impending interrogation. You’d be angry at them, except that would make you a hypocrite since you’ve also spread a rumor or two about your coworkers in the past. You can feel an increase of anxiety rush through your bloodstream, making you stuff your hands into your pockets lest anyone sees them trembling and laughs.

Your three superiors are already seated and waiting in the conference room when you arrive. You make eye contact with each one, bowing your head as both a greeting and sign of respect. Lang, a dark-haired man who is known for shooting first and asking questions later, offers you a jaunty salute before lacing his hands behind his head as he balances his chair on its rear legs, the image of relaxation. Morgan Elsbeth, the only female of the trio, elects to ignore you in favor of boredly drumming her fingers on the glass tabletop, looking as if she’d rather be anywhere else in the galaxy than here. Hess returns the nod with a leering grin, further convincing you he was half-womp rat in his mortal life.

You reach for the chair closest to you, planning to pull it out to sit, when Hess’ low, gravelly voice has you freezing mid-motion. “Cupid 1-1-7, you are to remain standing for the duration of this meeting.”

“Yes, sir,” you say, clasping your hands behind your back.

Hess turns in his seat towards the holoprojector that is set up on the table. He presses several buttons and a holographic figure flickers into view, dressed in dark armor with a long black cape. You recognize the seraph immediately, never able to forget the first face you saw when you woke up as a Cupid. Moff Gideon is the supreme leader of all Cupids, imposing and sharp-witted with violent powers you’ve often heard described as barbarically ruthless. Everything about him terrifies you and you’ve done all you can to avoid being in his presence.

Only now there is no escaping him. You can’t even teleport to save yourself. When headquarters was initially built, Gideon infused his powers into its structure with the intent of protecting the building from being discovered or, worse, attacked. (Though who would want to battle a bunch of Cupids, you have no idea). However, to the detriment of all Cupids currently inside headquarters, Gideon’s enchantment also blocks any of you from using your abilities. According to him, it’s to prevent any power-sensitive beings from detecting your aura signatures and you’ve never wanted to risk being murdered to try and find a flaw with that logic.

To put it bluntly, you’re a regular human in every sense except you get to keep your immortal youthfulness. Which is literally the least helpful perk you could ask for right now.

“Cupid 1-1-7,” Gideon says, dark eyes peering at you with such focused intensity you feel sweat begin to form along your hairline. “You were granted forty-eight hours to determine your client’s soulmate. Tell us, were you successful in finding his match?”

“I—” you cut yourself off, noticing his use of a gender specific term.

He chuckles at your dumbfounded expression, a quiet huff of air that you quickly deem the scariest sound you’ve ever heard. “You may have been able to conceal Death’s identity as your client from my associates, but few incidents occur in the galaxy without my knowing about them.”

Your three superiors each display unique reactions to the reveal. Morgan’s drumming stops, attention now hooked by the present conversation and she gives you a once-over, clearly reconsidering her overall impression of you. Lang nearly falls backwards onto the floor, barely managing to correct the chair at the last second to balance himself. Hess props his chin on top of his interlocked fingers, observing you in a similar fashion as Morgan, but there is an eerie glint in his gaze you don’t like the look of.

You swallow thickly, feeling sick to your stomach. “What do you want from me, sir?”

“The full and honest truth.” There is a brief pause, increasing the tension in the room. “Were you successful in finding Death’s soulmate?”

You don’t understand why he’s asking you the same question twice when he’s admitted he’s practically omniscient. And the way he’d paused just now, makes you start to worry he’s baiting you into a trap, but you have no viable means of escaping to avoid giving him an answer.

Your voice comes out meeker sounding than you’ve ever heard it. “Yes, sir, I was successful.”

When it becomes apparent after a long beat of silence you are not going to admit any further information, Gideon levels you with a stern look. “I strongly urge you to reveal their identity to us, Cupid 1-1-7, so we may make note of them in our archives as is customary for all matched pairs.”

Well now that makes you definitely feel cornered. Your thoughts are a jumbled mess inside your head; half of you is convinced he already knows you are Din’s soulmate and is toying with you, while the other half believes he actually has no idea at all and is trying to scare you into revealing the truth.

Kriff. What do you do?

You stare over their heads at the far wall, uncomfortably aware of how the silence stretches on as they wait for a name. Your name. Maker, why do you keep ending up in these horrible scenarios? Who did you piss off in your mortal life?

“If your tongue has failed you,” Gideon says, tone deceptively light and airy. “Might I suggest that an alternative way of answering would be to show us your hands.”

He knows.

Kriff. Kriff. Kriff.

You continue your staring contest with the wall, refusing to let them see any indication your blood has turned to ice or that your lungs are on the verge of collapsing. Think, you rack your brain frantically. For Maker’s sake, think of something .

“You’re already in hot water, Cupid 1-1-7,” Lang says. His southern accent softens the words, but you still manage to detect the warning laced within them. “Don’t make it worse for yourself by being stubborn.”

As much as you loathe to admit it, Lang has a point. By continuing to resist, you’re only hurting yourself by increasing the time spent separated from Din. You don’t want to break your promise to him. Or, that little voice in the back of your mind chips in, cause Din to destroy Kuiil’s farm out of a panic-induced rage when you don’t show up tonight like you promised you would.

Inhaling a deep breath to steady your nerves, you hold out your marked hand, palm facing up to clearly display the soulmate marking. The little black heart almost seems to glow at being the center of attention.

“That is impossible,” Morgan murmurs, looking from your hand to her colleagues and back again. “No one can have two soulmates.”

“And yet here we have living proof contradicting that belief,” Gideon answers, gesturing towards you grandly with both arms. There is something in his voice—awe, you identify a second later—that has your body instinctively stiffening.

“That belief is the natural order of the universe.” Morgan’s voice is snappish, but outwardly she is her calm and collected self, not a single strand of hair out of place. “She is a deviation of the norm. A glitch.”

“If other Cupids find out about her,” Hess begins, pointing a finger at you like the others have no idea who he’s talking about. Like you’re not able to hear every word. “They’ll start thinking maybe there’s a second soulmate out there somewhere for them too, someone to replace the one who rejected them in their mortal life. They’ll start questioning the natural order, the foundation of our galactic society, and all those questions will only lead to one thing: unrestrained chaos.”

“In order to prevent that unfavorable outcome, I would like to encourage a moment of observation.” Gideon looks to someone out of range of the holoprojector, nodding his head once in confirmation. “Take one last long look for Cupid 1-1-7 is a unique anomaly you may never have the chance of seeing again.”

You blink, heart going still as the implication registers. “What?”

Before anyone can answer or scold you, a purple-skinned twi'lek Cupid you don’t recognize casually enters the conference room, like she isn’t guilty of intruding on a private meeting. Almost as if...someone had summoned her. Your gaze darts briefly to Gideon, suspicions confirmed when you see his smirking face, before looking back at the twi’lek drawing closer.

“It’s time for your reassessment test. I’m here to take you there,” she tells you, baring her fanged teeth in what you think is supposed to be a smile, but it lacks any warmth or friendliness. You can only stare back at her, every cell in your body screaming this isn’t right. You shouldn’t need an escort to the testing room.

“I can go by myself,” you protest, holding your ground.

She lunges forward with lightning-quick reflexes, seizing your elbow and leaning disturbingly close into your personal space. “Pity,” she says, feigning a pout. “I thought we could become friends.”

Something sharp pricks your arm. You first notice the mischievous gleam in her dark eyes, and then when you look down, you discover a needle being pulled out of you arm. The room starts to spin, fuzzy black spots appearing in the corners of your vision, and you sag against the wall, balance failing you.

Closing your eyes, you try to focus on your soulmate bond, calling out to Din as the numbing sensation spreads to your feet and you collapse onto the floor without an ounce of grace.

Then, distant and distorted, as if it is coming from somewhere underwater hundreds of miles away, you hear a responding cry, “Angel!”

Din. Oh, thank the Maker, you think hysterically. The delicate line between reality and imagination shifts and blurs, as if it also is succumbing to the drug’s influence. You feel his hands clutch at your face, then move to your shoulders, shaking you in an effort to force your eyes open. You want to see his beautiful face, even if it is merely an illusion, but your eyelids feel as if they suddenly weigh a hundred pounds each.

“Tell me where you are,” he demands, tightly gripping your arms to the point of pain. “I’ll come save you, just tell me where I can find you.”

The answer is on the tip of your tongue, only your mind starts to drift again, pulling you away from him towards unconsciousness. Your bond's strength wavers, unable to keep the connection stable across the lengthy distance separating you and him, and it begins to curl in on itself.

Din must notice this, too, screaming so loudly it verges on roaring, “Stay with me, angel! Please, just stay with—”

The last thing you think of before everything goes black is how much you hate breaking your pinky promise to him.

Tag List: @leilei-draws​, @theocatkov​, @vintagesaph​, @stardust-and-starlight​, @adrieunor​, @remmyswritings​, @gallowsjoker​, @rhiannon-russo​, @randomness501​, @sylphene​, @softly-sad​, @maytheglitter​, @melobee​, @rogertaylorsfalsettogivesmehives​, @eleinemk​, @captain-jebi​, @aerynwrites​, @promiscuoussatan​, @stilllivindue2spite​, @coaaster​, @lin-djarin​, @becauseican2, @kay2304, @odelia-d32, @nicotinebirds

#din djarin x you #din djarin x reader #din x you #din x reader #death and an angel #my fic #Din Djarin #the mandalorian #pedro pascal #pedro pascal character fanfiction #my writing #soulmate au #mandalorian x reader

[shemarmooresfedora]

Menagerie

Summary Quote: “Don’t you get it? It’s all been a lie, Spence. Since the moment we met, our entire relationship has been founded on a carefully crafted lie and since then, we have been tricked into thinking this was love...but maybe that was a lie too.”

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem! Reader

Genre: Angst with happy ending, Fluff

A/N: this fic has already been completed! it’s 25 chapters and just over 40,000 words. i don’t plan on posting all the chapters on to here but i have included the first two and the ao3 link to the rest is at the bottom if you are interested!

Chapter 1

You woke up from your peaceful slumber to hear a loud crash followed closely by someone yelling “FBI”. You screamed, alerting the agents of your presence thinking you were in danger but once the agents had reached your bedroom, you were being put in handcuffs and read your rights.

“W-What is happening? Is this some sort of sick joke?” you stuttered.

“Do you think killing three men is a sick joke?” the muscular intimidating agent spat back.

You were in utter shock. You barely even left the house let alone go out on a murderous rampage.

“I-I don’t know what you think I did b-but I can assure you I-I didn’t kill anyone or do anything illegal,” you tried to stay as calm as possible but you were shaking profusely.

The other agent that was the back-up in your apprehension seemed to notice this and took some sympathy on you by lightening his grip on your cuffs as he led you out of your front door that had been kicked down.

-

You sat in the chilly interrogation room wishing you had something else on rather than a thrifted oversized t-shirt with stains on it that said “Best Dad Ever” and sweatpants. They removed your handcuffs, I guess you weren't considered that much of a threat in a locked room in FBI Headquarters. Although you could not see past the one-sided glass, it was obvious the agents from before and possibly others from their team were standing on the other side, observing you.

-

“Well she is definitely not what I was expecting,” Prentiss was the first to break the silence as the whole BAU team watched you through the glass.

“She was sleeping when we apprehended her. Her facial expressions and body language showed clear signs of distress but I can not be certain if it was because we have the wrong person or she is scared she finally got caught. In her apartment, we found nothing in the slightest bit incriminating, mostly just lots of books,” Spencer spoke, while he was trying to remain impartial, he had admired your taste in literature as he was looking for evidence.

“I’m not convinced. I think this is whole ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’ thing is an act,” Morgan stated as he strolled to the door leading to the room you were being held in.

-

The door opened and your eyes flickered up. Much to my dismay, it was the muscular agent rather than the tall, lanky agent who seemed a lot friendlier to you, given the circumstances.

He took the seat across from you and spoke firmly, “I am ready to take your confession whenever you are.”

At this point, you were just getting frustrated. You were ripped from your bed in the middle of the night given no explanation other than you had supposedly killed three men and he had the audacity to ask for your confession to something no one would even tell you the details of. So against your better judgment, you opened your mouth which has been known to get you in trouble from time to time.

“Well, considering no one has even told me what I am formally being accused of or the details, I can’t do that. Do you even have any evidence to keep me here? Oh wait...you don’t...that’s why you need a confession because all your evidence so far has been circumstantial. Only too bad for you...I know my rights. So, you have forty-eight hours to find some real evidence against me, that doesn’t exist if I may add, before you have to let me go.”

The agent looked back at the glass with his jaw dropped.

“I watch a lot of crime TV shows,” you huffed and crossed your arms.

-

“Okay this may be harder than we originally planned, folks. We are going to need everyone on call for the next forty-eight hours until we find some incriminating evidence,” Hotch spoke.

The agents began to depart from the room to review old case files and dig deeper into your personal history. Spencer stayed back for a few minutes and saw tears start to roll down your face when you thought no one was still watching you. You quickly wiped them away and wringed your fingers together. Spencer didn’t know if he should or not yet but he felt bad for you.

Chapter 2

The door opened again but this time, you just kept your eyes down at the table so the person could not see your watery eyes.

You have been trying to put up a brave face but every time, a different agent comes in to question you about your routine, friends, family, and personal life, you just feel exposed.

Traces of your DNA had been found on the bodies and they had all visited your bookstore but that wasn’t enough to convict you I guess. You didn’t know the victims personally but you still felt bad for them.

A cup of coffee was placed gently into your line of sight. You wrapped your hands around the warm paper cup and mumbled your thanks.

“I didn’t know how you liked it. I can add more creamer or sugar if you like,” the voice spoke.

You glanced up tentatively and it was the tall, lanky agent. Your lips turned up ever so slightly into a small smile but it was the most you could manage at the moment. You took a sip.

“No it’s fine, thank you. It really helps. I appreciate it,” you said.

“I’m Spencer, by the way”

“Y/N, but you probably already know that by now.”

He chuckled at your joke. Silence filled the room once again.

“I didn’t do it, Spencer...and I know I can’t really prove that but I wish I could. Most of my friends live in another state and so does my family so I don’t go out too often. I don’t have a boyfriend. I own a bookstore so I spend most of my time there. I don’t really know why this is happening to me,” you started to get choked up again so you stopped talking.

-

Spencer involuntarily blushed when you stated you didn’t have a boyfriend.

He really needed to get it together as much as he wanted to believe you.

You could be a murderer for all he knows...but a really pretty murderer with a great taste in literature and probably even a bigger collection of books than him.

Stop it, Spencer, get your head in the game. He smiled softly once more at you cradling your drink and exited the room.

-

The forty-eight hours were up. They had nothing solid against you. If anything, the team had less of a case against you.

The bodies were all dumped on the opposite side of town from where you lived but it was clear they had been transported there. Garcia’s digging showed you had no car and you weren’t lying when you said most of your friends and family live out of state so the chances of you borrowing someone else's car were unlikely.

Credit card receipts showed you hardly ever went to that side of town and they had profiled the unsub would know the area well.

The victims did come into your store a few times but they also visited all the shops on that street occasionally as well. It didn’t make sense for you to kill your customers. That would just be bad for business and easily linked back to you.

The team agreed that they believed Y/N was no longer a suspect.

-

An officer drove you back to your apartment where luckily, your door had been fixed.

You ordered takeout and took a shower to hopefully rid yourself of the stress of the past two days. Shortly after your dinner, you fell asleep hoping your door would not be busted down again by the FBI.

-

A few days had past and you were opening up the store for the morning. You were in the back organizing the nonfiction section when you heard the soft bell chime of the door opening.

You walked to the front expecting to greet one of your regulars. Once you saw who was standing shyly at the front desk, you stopped in your tracks.

“Spencer?”

“Uh h-hi-hello Y/N. How are you?”

“Good...unless you are here to bring me back in for more questioning”, you said half-joking half-seriously.

“Oh! Um no, you’re all set. I am truly sorry about that. But I do have a question for you”, he was nervously wringing his hands just like you do, looking anywhere but your eyes.

“It’s okay kind of sounds like the wrong thing to say because I would preferably not be dragged out of my bed in the middle of the night and then held for forty-hours but I understand, you were simply doing your job. Anyways, ask away,” you replied.

His eyes finally made contact with yours and he opened his mouth like he was about to say something but completely lost his confidence.

“Do you...um do you...do you have a nonfiction section?” Spencer blurted out.

You didn’t understand how the nonfiction section could make someone so nervous. He looked as if he was going to say something else but thought better of it.

“Of course! I was just organizing it! Right this way!” you chirped with a smile that seemed to untense his shoulders just a little bit.

Spencer perused the section a bit before deciding on a hefty book about the different plants and flowers native to the East Coast. When he made his way up to the front desk to check out, you praised his choice.

“Aw! I love reading about plants. I have some many succulents in my apartment. It's honestly more of a jungle. Have you ever seen forget-me-nots? So lovely!”

Spencer smiled and nodded, knowing if he tried to speak it would be gibberish because he could not focus on anything when he was looking at your radiant smile.

-

“Did you do it?”, Morgan asked as Spencer entered the bullpen with a brown bag.

“No but now I have a book on plants and flowers. I actually am excited to read it. Did you know that some plants like orchids do not require soil to grow they get their nutrients from-”

“You chickened out”, Derek sighed.

“She is so pretty! She was just standing there in all her radiance smiling at me and I couldn’t take the rejection. We dragged her out of her bed and put her in handcuffs only to find out two days later, she is innocent. I can hardly believe she is still being nice to me despite it.”

“Well believe it or not, the first night I met a girl, she was in handcuffs in her bed with me so it’s not always a bad thing,” Morgan smirked.

“Not appropriate, Morgan,” Spencer scolded.

“What are we talking about? I don’t like to not be included in the gossip!” Garcia ran over in her pink heels with Prentiss right behind her.

“Pretty Ricky here went to visit Y/N at her bookstore but then chickened out about asking her on a date,” Morgan informed them.

“Awwwww! I like her! She’s so pretty! Plus, I have already done a background search on her and she is squeaky clean now that we have proven she isn’t a murderer,” Garcia excitedly rambled.

Prentiss was nodding her head in agreement, grinning at Spencer.

Spencer had already chugged his morning cup of coffee during this conversation just to have an excuse to go get another cup and leave this conversation.

“You can’t run away from your feelings, Boy Wonder!” Garcia shouted.

Chapters 3-25

#spencer reid fluff #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfiction #cm fanfic #reid x reader #spencer x reader #spencer reid #criminal minds

[in-my-feels-probably]

INEFFABLE - Kaz Brekker

Chapter One - Now

If you would like to read this on Wattpad, it’s on there as well, my @ is in_my_feels_probably and there’s a few visuals and better descriptions and stuff on there. otherwise, enjoy, let me know what you think, and you can check out my masterlist for updates and more. 

don’t forget to read the prologue, it’s important to the story!

INEFFABLE – Kaz Brekker

ineffable (adj.) too great to be expressed in words, utterly indescribable; too sacred to speak of. 

Chapter One - Now

Elham gazed up from her book, sitting at the bar, to the sound of a gunshot at one of the card tables. Sighing, she got up from her seat, sliding her book to Rotty to take back to her room. And to think she was finally going to get a quiet night in the Slat, the previous night being not so quiet.

She began making her way over to the table, where Jesper was sitting leaning back, a knowing smirk on his face, his pistol smoking in its holster. Before she could reach the table, the familiar sound of a cane clicking on the ground was getting closer and closer to her. A light grin on her face, she slowed her pace, allowing Kaz to catch up, nod in her direction, and pass her.

“No loud noises at the table, Jesper. You’ll scare off the pigeons.”

Elham barely paid attention to the two boys' conversation, instead pocketing the counterfeit Zemeni coin left on the table, as well as a few Ravkan bills. Kaz was well aware she had slipped the money in her pocket, but he chose not to say anything, watching Jesper make his way to guard the door. She had been a big help in the previous night's heist, and arguing with her wasn’t worth the slew of sarcastic comments she would send his way. If there was a next time, he’d reprimand her. At least that’s how he justified it to himself. Elham knew his threats were hollow, to her they always were.

Elham trailed behind Kaz as Rotty had returned to talk to him about a missing Dekappel painting. He rambled on about how hard it must have been to steal it from the merchant, how advanced the security system was, locked down to the nines, complete with a Fabrikator made lock. She smirked to herself, eyes pointed towards the floor, trying not to laugh.

Kaz tapped the back of her leg with his cane, signaling her to go before she made Rotty suspicious, and she turned making her way up the stairs to Kaz’s office. She went straight for her chair, the one spot in the room she felt comfortable being in. This was Kaz’s space, and despite the two growing close over the years, and her constantly in his office or room, she still felt the need to confide herself to the space he had given her.

He had put that chair in by the window after he noticed how uncomfortable she looked on the window ledge when she came into his office to read, or chat about a heist. And plus, the window’s ledge was Inej’s spot, occupied by her as she came and went, feeding the crows and returning to the rooftops. Elham made herself comfortable in the chair, glancing around the room, eyes landing on the Dekappel hung on the wall.

Lifting the painting hadn’t been the easiest job. She wasn’t sure why Kaz had even decided to steal it in the first place. Nobody knew it was them who had taken it. Perhaps he did it for his own satisfaction, to prove he couldn’t be bested by some “advanced” security system. Or secretly, he had a taste for the finer things in life, and was too embarrassed to be caught shopping for a piece of art himself, and he sure as hell wasn’t about to ask Elham to get something for him. He’d never hear the end of it.

She’d like to think his reason was the latter.

Elham grinned to herself, reaching to pick up one of the books scattered across Kaz’s desk, when he walked into the room, latching the door behind him. He said nothing, only slightly scoffing at her position, curled up in the chair by the window in what looked like the most uncomfortable way she could possibly be. He could feel his own leg aching at the idea of contorting it the way she currently had hers, but she only smirked up at him, like this was the most comfortable she had been all day.

Sometimes, he thought to himself that everything Elham did was to spite him, or to try and get some sort of visible reaction. As the years passed by, his mask became harder and harder to read, and she made multiple attempts to slip through the cracks and see what was underneath. Unfortunately, this attempt was futile, and he made his way through the archway into his room, heading for the bathroom sink.

Elham, who had been shuffling her feet waiting for Kaz to finish, stood as she felt a draft hit her. She slowly made her way around the corner, only to meet his eyes already looking at her in the mirror, and then glancing towards the open window behind him. He faced forward again as he watched Elham’s lips turn up into a smile as she looked at the window.

“Hello, Inej. What information do you have for me?”

“A lead on a job. A big one. Enough money to change lives.”

Elham smirked to herself as she gave Inej a quick hug. “I don’t think it’ll take much to change someone’s life in the Barrel. I mean, look at us.”

“A million kruge?” Inej asked, smirking. Elham whipped her head towards her at that, then turned to meet Kaz’s eyes in the mirror. He gave her a nod, and she took that as her que to leave.

As the unofficial mother of the group, it was her job to round up the Crows and inform the Dregs, to make sure they were ready for a heist. Mostly, her job was to round up Jesper, make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. Jesper, of course, was at one of the gambling tables, leaned back in his chair, staring intently at his cards.

“Jesper!” He looked up from his hand and glanced around the room till his eyes fell on her. She motioned for him to follow, and he met her by the staircase leading to Kaz’s office. “We have a job. I don’t know the details yet, but just be prepared for me to come find you or Kaz to give you an order. Oh and Jesper, love, pick another game. How many hands am I gonna have to watch you play before you run out of bills? Really, it’s getting hard to watch at this point.”

She quickly took off back up the stairs before his swat could meet her arm, only to nearly run into Inej on the way up.

“Inej? What’s wrong?” Elham asked, catching Inej’s hand and giving it a squeeze.

“He infuriates me sometimes. I honestly don’t know how you deal with him.” She gave Elham a light smile before continuing down the stairs, heading in Jesper’s direction. Elham climbed the stairs once more and made her way back into Kaz’s office.

---

“You’re serious? The Fold? You know how to get across the Fold?” She gave Kaz an exasperated look. In all her years of knowing him, this might have been the most idiotic idea he’s had yet. But, with a million kruge on the table, she knew there was nothing stopping him.

“No, I don't know how to get across. But I may know a few people who do. Come on, go and find Jesper, tell him the plan. We’re meeting with Dreesen at midnight. I’ll meet you all in the alley in half an hour.”

She nodded, turning to head towards the door. “Kaz...does Pekka know about this job?”

His eyes darkened at the mention of the name, his grip on his cane’s head becoming tighter. He shook his head with uncertainty, face set with a hardened look. Elham nodded, jaw clenching at the thought. Dealing with Pekka Rollins certainly wasn’t on her to do list, and in all honesty, she was hoping to never meet the man.

Throughout the years, Kaz had told her bits and pieces about what Pekka had done to him, and she had learned for herself what kind of a monster he and his men could be. His Dime Lion’s were the reason she started killing in the first place. Pekka Rollins could count his days. With Dirtyhands and the Valkyrie after him, he was certainly doomed.

Seeing her eyes drift, her thoughts cloud, he sighed, tapping her ankle with the end of his cane, and her eyes met his. “Go on, Valkyrie. And think about losing the murderous look on your face before you scare the pigeons.” His tone was laced with sarcasm, a tactic she normally used on him.

“I’ll think about it.”

---

A few hours later, the Crows had interrogated the slew of people Kaz and Jesper knew that claimed they knew a way across the Fold. Of course, none of them had a safe way, and Elham began pondering if the million kruge was worth the imminent death. They were back in the Crow Club, sitting in a booth. Inej was twirling her knife, Elham was sharpening her sword, and Kaz was glancing around with his usual look of annoyance. Jesper finally broke the silence.

“Here’s what I don’t get.”

“We’re going to be here all night.” Inej commented. Elham let out a laugh at that, patting Jesper on the shoulder.

“Rude.”

“I’m going to have to get a drink for this conversation. Anyone want one?” Elham asked, heading for the bar. She returned to the table with shots in hand, to hear Jesper mention General Kirigan. She stopped in her tracks, setting the drinks on the table, before taking a step back.

“Are you alright, El?” Jesper asked, but she didn’t hear. Her mind raced back to her days at the Little Palace, to the warnings from Baghra about the General. Her thoughts continued tangling together, and she was unaware of Jesper and Inej’s attempts to get her attention.

“Elham.”

She glanced up at the voice. Kaz’s voice. Elham cleared her throat.

“Sorry, I’m fine. Just got sidetracked. Sorry to miss what I’m sure were your very intelligent remarks, Jesper.” She quickly changed the subject, missing how Kaz’s eyes lingered on her. She slid back into the booth, throwing back a shot. They continued their conversation, Elham quieter than before. Kaz didn’t miss that either.

“Well, as I was saying. This whole job sounds like a trap, anyways.” Jesper said, before sipping one of the drinks Elham had brought over.

“A trap would sound easy. This is something else.” Kaz remarked.

“Boss, boss. We intercepted a note from Dreesen. It’s from the Orchid. Say’s they require the services of a Heartrender. Tonight. Doesn’t say why, just that they need it before midnight.” One of the Dregs who had come running over explained.

Elham smirked. “Oh we are absolutely not letting this job go.”

“You don’t bring in a Heartrender unless you need an answer out of someone who isn’t willing to talk. That’s how we get this job before anyone else. Bring Dreeson a Heartrender.”

“Boss, just one problem. Pekka Rollins knows.”

Kaz glanced at Elham, who only looked more determined. Elham downed another shot, before standing up.

“Well. I’m feeling particularly vengeful tonight. Let’s go get a Heartrender.”

---

A/N - hi everyone, sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. i've been busy and didn't have much motivation to write, but I'm ready to go again. let me know what you think so far, and thank you for the support!

#wattpad #in my feels probably #ineffable #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #six of crows #six of crows imagine #shadow and bone #oc #series #chapterone #grishaverse

[wesimpforxiao]

Say My Name and I’ll Be There: 5.4

Darkness.

What a strange feeling it is to have your senses deprived and stolen from you.  Were you still alive, or were you also nothing in this realm of nothingness? Look at you, unable to form a coherent thought or a cry for help.  Look at how you've fallen.

You've fallen too deep this time.  Was Xiao even looking for you?  Did they manage to kill Childe?  Was Aether defeated?  Did the Fatui get what they needed from you, and discard your body in the snow?  All these fears floated alongside you in this sea of darkness, but you could not discern the answers.

Just how much time passed since you were dragged into that portal?

But as soon as you found yourself in this wretched place of nothing, something began to manifest.  A single voice found you, then two.  Soon enough they were blaringly loud and obnoxious.  But eternal sleep sounded nice.  Maybe this darkness wasn't all bad.  A peaceful end to your unpeaceful demise.

"Why is she still sleeping?"  Childe sounded a bit agitated and overprotective as he glared at Signora.  "We require her to be in good health."

"Relax, Childe," Signora lent him a faint smile.  "Do you not know that archons and adepti can hear pleas for help?  This will keep the guardian you spoke of off our trail.  Later we'll use it as bait to capture him."

"It wasn't necessary to hit her so hard," he muttered.  He could still see caked blood at your hairline.

"Now that we're back, I'll inform the Tsaritsa of our achievement.  Make sure she doesn't try anything stupid."  Signora left the cell and retreated upstairs.

Childe watched her leave and returned his gaze to you.  His fingers lightly traced your jaw.  "I warned you that things would get ugly, ojou-chan.  You should have considered an early surrender."

............................................

"I can't hear her," Xiao paced the city gates while Aether and Paimon tried to reassure him.  The worry that exuded the otherwise composed yaksha was enough to put them even more on edge.  If only he had been faster, if he had pushed off the ledge harder, you wouldn't be in the Fatui's hands now.  A part of him tore himself to shreds for his lack of agility in the spur of the moment, but he quickly silenced it.  Reducing himself to a failure would only hinder his ability to rescue you when the time came.

"We know where they're headed! They'll be in Snezhnaya without a doubt!" Paimon attempted to bring optimism to her friends.

"It won't be that easy to infiltrate their base," Aether groaned.  "We won't even know where she's being held, or if she's even there in the first place."  This comment only seemed to agitate the yaksha further.

Aether was right, and Xiao hated it.  As much as he wanted to barge into Snezhnaya the second you disappeared, acting on emotion and rage wouldn't do you any good.  The likelihood that they were using you as bait was too high.  He needed to formulate a plan, just like every other battle he's participated in.  "Quiet," Xiao ordered the two of them to shut up in a disturbingly low voice.  "I need silence."

"S-Sorry!"

The yaksha disappeared without another word, and reappeared before Zhongli in Liyue.  He was just leaving the funeral parlor after a long day.  "We have a problem," Xiao growled.

......................................

"Mmph," you slowly regained consciousness sometime the next day.  "M-my head..."  Your blurry vision slowly focused on the ground in front of you.  The amount of scum on the tile made your stomach riot, and your gaze shifted to your wrists which were chained to the ground.  "So...dizzy."

The sound of metal clinking made you look up.  A Fatui agent was unlocking your cell door, and Childe entered.  "Good, you're awake.  Someone very important wishes to meet you."  He nodded to his subordinate, who then unchained your hands from the floor and rechained them behind your back.  Childe grabbed you by your injured arm and pulled you to your feet.

"Ngh!"  The sudden rise of pain in your shoulder made him chuckle.

"That wasn't even me going all-out, ojou-chan," he spoke in a quiet voice as he guided you down a dim narrow hallway.  "That injury is nothing compared to the ones you'll soon receive."

"Shut up," you groaned, not particularly caring if it'd earn you torture later.  The two of you soon came upon a set of doors, and Childe guided you through them.

The room was grand and remarkably...dim.  The air was stale and seemed to freeze in here.  Over ten Fatui agents and skirmishers, the top of their ranks, stood on either side of the path that led to an underwhelming throne.  The blue glow that shone through the windows illuminated you much like an interrogation light.  Childe pushed you onto your knees once you reached the empty seat at the far end of the room; he spared no expense at agitating your injury, a sadistic smile spreading across his lips every time he heard your stifled groans.

A figure moved from the shadows and took its seat on the throne.  The shadows from its headboard obscured the person before you, but you didn't need to know what the person looked like to give you an answer.

"Bow," the friendly mask of Childe finally broke completely, and he forced you to the ground with a foot to your back.  "It's customary to show your respect before Her Majesty."

"Urk," your face smooshed against the cold tile.  You appreciated that it was much cleaner than your cell floor.  It was a weird thing to focus on given the circumstances, but if you were going to live in that disgusting cell the rest of your life, might as well appreciate what you have now, right?

"Rise," a powerful voice boomed through the room, and Childe yanked you back to your knees.

You're really milking this, aren't you?  You glared at the harbinger when your shoulder ached from his harshness, but his hardened expression was focused on his queen.  That's when you noticed Signora to the left, who was accompanied by two other powerful-looking individuals.  Harbingers.

I can't call Xiao here, you realized with disappointment.  Even with his years of experience, he couldn't face four harbingers and an archon alone.  If you were to call him, he'd be here instantly and without the aid of Aether or anyone else.  It would serve as a trap.  Knowing this, your shoulders dropped with the weight of an overwhelming sense of helplessness.

You were alone.

"Do you know what this is?" The figure leaned forward enough so that her gloved hand was exposed to the light, along with an object you recognized to be your vision. The panicked look you gave your empty belt loop seemed to satisfy her question.  "I hadn't realized I had gifted a vision to someone very valuable to our cause," she mused, turning the vision over in her hand.  "You see, we archons bestow visions subconsciously.  If I had known you were my target, it wouldn't have been gifted to you.  I give you my thanks for your cooperation, but you will not be needing this."  She crushed it in her hands, and let the shattered pieces clatter to the ground with the faint clinking of glass and metal.

"Wait, no!"  You threw yourself forward, but Childe's grip prevented you from moving. That was my only chance! My...only...!  Tears dribbled down your cheeks, and Childe watched you with an empty gaze.  If there was some slim possibility of getting out of here, that was it.  You stared brokenly at the pieces sitting on the floor.

"If you prove your loyalty to my cause, dearest one, perhaps you'll earn it back," the voice echoed through the chamber.  "But until then, that will pose a problem.  We don't want you to leave prematurely, do we? You had only just arrived."

"P-please," you cried.  "Please don't do this."  Childe brought you to your feet and began to escort you out of the room.  "Please!  No! NO!"  His escort was more like dragging your flailing body as you tried to kick at him.  "Noooo!"

Your screams of protest no longer echoed in the chamber once the doors shut behind you.  A few Fatui held looks of uncertainty or even fear behind their masks, but remained silent.  The room was quiet until Signora spoke.  "Who will be in charge of her?"

The Tsaritsa's lifeless eyes floated to the harbinger that stood to Signora's right.  "Il Dottore."

The white-haired man grinned manically with only half of his smile visible from beneath his mask.  "What an excellent casting, Your Majesty.  You will not be let down with the results of my research."

.......................................

Childe chained your wrists to the floor once he returned you to the cell.  He brought a stool into the room and sat on it, intent on watching you until he was called to do otherwise.  You didn't meet his eyes.  "I gave you a way out," Childe spoke as he watched various expressions pass across your face while you thought of your options of escape.  "To avoid the torment that's to come.  You have no idea what you're in for."

"Shut up."

"If you follow instructions, I'm sure you'll earn a few luxuries."

"Like a clean cell?" You rolled your eyes.  "Why would you do something like this? I don't get it."

"I owe my loyalty to--"

"No!" Your shout cut him off.  "Cut the crap, Tartaglia.  Why?" Your eyes glowed enough to illuminate the cell, then faded again.  Your determination to remain strong continued to shine in your pupils, though.  "If what you told me in Dragonspine was true, if you actually were interested in me, you wouldn't be doing this.  I don't give a damn about your rehearsed 'loyalty' line, I'm sick of hearing it.  So why?"

Childe searched your eyes for his own answer.  

"You lied to us, said that you just wanted to join us on an adventure for awhile," you continued, eyes moist with the beginning of tears.  "You ate with us. You laughed with us.  You sparred with us.  Did all of that mean nothing to you? We trusted you!"

"Sweet, naïve ojou-chan.  Trust is for children. This should've been expected."  He stood up and grabbed the brim of the stool.  He walked towards the cell door.

"Do you even care about family?"  The question stopped him in his tracks, but he didn't face you.  "You've talked about your siblings before.  Do you really expect me to believe you have family values if you disregarded mine?"

"Watch your words, comrade."  A dangerous voice left his lips, but it didn't faze you.

"How would you feel if I had been the one to meddle in your family's affairs?  To kill them?  Do they know how many sins you've committed against innocent people?  Do you tell them? Have you told Teucer, or do you continue to wear the same stupid façade of a respectable, perfect older brother?  I'd love to see the look on his face when he finds out you're nothing but a monster and a fraud."

Your head slammed into the wall behind you, and Childe's face was suddenly inches away from yours.  His hand pressed against your neck enough to deprive you of air, but it eased slightly as he continued to look at you.  "Let me get one thing straight.  I didn't kill your grandmother," his voice was quiet, with slight guilt, and at the same time full of rage.

"T-then why did you force her to sign the house away?" You gasped for air when he finally let go of your neck.

"She signed it of her own accord," he rose to his feet.

"But why?"

"She refused to give information for free, so we offered her a considerable amount of money and to buy her house so she could move wherever she'd like," Childe grinned slightly when you gave him a look of skepticism.  "In the end, she didn't have any useful information on you.  But I was more than willing to oblige her, since I respect family."  

He replaced his seat back in the middle of the cell and silently watched you once again.  You didn't really know how to respond to his words about Granny, so you just glared at the muck on the floor.

Coming up:  First contact, a plot of rescue and...a rare sight of a yaksha.

#genshin impact #xiao genshin impact #xiao #genshin impact xiao #xiao x reader #xiao fanfiction #xiao one shot #genshin imagines

[ayybtch]

The One

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader

Summary: Things are going up and down for you as you try to navigate life after your breakup with Bucky. Everything leads to an accidental run-in with him at a coffee shop that leaves you and Bucky wondering if things could have been different. Based on the song The 1 by Taylor Swift.

Warnings: This is an angsty fic. The reader is actively struggling with mental illness and a breakup. There are mentions of being on antidepressants and symptoms such as anxiety, insomnia, and sometimes not having the energy for personal care, but nothing in-depth.

Word Count: 11,261

A/N: I owe a very special thank you to @borkingbarnes​, who has supportively been screaming at me for writing this ever since I told her this idea and gave me some brilliant suggestions during her beta read. The dividers were made by the lovely @whimsicalrogers​.

“So, how have the new meds been treating you? Are they still making you nauseous after you first take them?”

You looked across the room at your therapist and shook your head, “No, they’re not making me nauseous anymore. I’ve been making sure that I’ve got food in my stomach first and not just a cup of coffee. I’ve also been better about taking them at the same time each day,” you said.

She smiled at you. “Do you feel like they’ve been helping?”

You shrugged and offered a half-smile back. Not satisfied with your answer, she continued probing. “Well, do you feel like you have more energy than on the other meds? Are you sleeping more….?” She trailed off at the end, voice hopeful.

“Oh. Yeah, I have been sleeping a little better. I’ve been sleeping closer to 5 hours each night, though it’s still taking a really long time for me to fall asleep. I’ve had more energy but I don’t know if that’s because of the meds or the sleep?” You trailed off a bit at the end, unsure of if that truly answered her question.

“It could be a mix of both. I’m glad to hear you’re sleeping more though, you weren’t getting very much when you first started seeing me.” She offered you another smile before adjusting herself in her seat and continuing, “Now, what have you been doing with this extra energy? Any new hobbies, catching up with friends, going on dates, anything like that?”

You shook your head no. “I don’t have much of a friend group anymore, not since…” your voice faded before the sentence finished. You closed your eyes and shook your head slightly. Pull yourself together. “I am meeting Natasha after this, actually. She and I were friends before everything and she’s the only one that’s really stuck around since. It’s been about a month since I last saw her so I’m looking forward to seeing her.” The therapist nodded and offered a sympathetic smile that made your stomach turn. You decided to continue before she chimed in.

“I’m running again too. I used to go on a nightly run before things got bad. It’s not for as long or as far as I used to but it’s better than sitting on the couch, I guess.”

She nodded and began writing on her notepad, “That’s wonderful. What do you enjoy about your runs?”

Her question was unexpected and it took you a minute to answer. “It’s peaceful. It’s one of the few times I can shut my brain off and zone out. Though, if it’s a bad day it doesn't always work.”

She nodded and paused, as if trying to carefully choose her next words. “One thing I’ve noticed whenever stuff comes up is that you always talk about ‘before’, but what about the ‘after’? Have you thought about trying to get back out there and start your ‘after’?” An uncomfortable knot formed in your stomach as she spoke.

“I don’t think I’m ready for that yet,” you whispered.

She pursed her lips but didn’t say anything. Eventually, she nodded and continued to make notes.

                                         ***

The session continued for another half hour before it ended with a smile and a brief conversation with her secretary, confirming your appointment for the same time next week.

As you stepped out the door, you let out a sigh of relief. Therapy sessions were hard. Even though today’s session had been relatively mild, the process was still draining and left you feeling exhausted most days. It really helped though and making the decision to go was one of the best decisions you could have made for yourself. A smile settled on your face as you pulled your jacket tighter across your chest before beginning your walk to meet Natasha.

You had discovered soon after starting therapy that walking to and from the appointment gave you the time you needed to prepare yourself for the session and unwind after. The hustle and bustle of New York created the perfect background noise for you to organize your thoughts. Most days it helped you process the questions the therapist asked. Often, you answered them a little deeper than what you had in the session knowing that nobody would know the real answer except for you.

Guilt gnawed at you as you thought about it. Wasn’t the whole point of therapy to be honest? Were you still getting as much out of it as you could if you were completely honest? You shook your head and sighed. Sometimes there were things better left unsaid.

One of the many things that had been left unsaid had to do with what you missed most about being with him. You had shrugged it off when she asked, saying it was nice having a person around because it was less lonely. While true, the full answer was more painful than you felt comfortable admitting out loud. He had understood you in ways nobody else ever had and nobody else ever would again. It gave you the freedom to be unapologetically you every second of the day. The thought of not being known like that again and having to put on a facade felt like the loneliest existence the universe had to offer. It made your chest ache.

Today though, it gave you the chance to collect your thoughts before Natasha had the opportunity to interrogate you. To be fair, it wasn’t really an interrogation. She was far too gentle when she asked you questions, though you’re sure that’s one of the many techniques she chose from. Interrogation or not though, she would be watching you like a hawk the entire meal to make sure you were actually doing as well as you were claiming.

It wasn’t long before you were standing outside Natasha’s favorite Italian restaurant. She always recommended meeting up here purely because of the breadsticks. She swore they were the best in New York and ate at least three full baskets by herself each visit. You paused before entering, suddenly nervous about how it would go. There’s nothing to worry about, Natasha isn’t going to bring him up and isn’t going to push me past my boundaries. You weren’t quite as convinced as you would have liked to be, but you couldn’t delay it any longer as you stepped inside.

A blast of warm air surrounded you as you were greeted by the hostess. It didn’t take for her to lead you back to where Natasha was sitting, a glass of wine already in her hand. A second sat waiting on the table for you.

You walked over, bending down to give her a side hug and a peck on the cheek.

“You’re late,” she said reproachfully, eyes zeroed in on yours.

“I know, I’m sorry. My session went a little over today.” You pulled out your chair and sat down before continuing, “How are you? It’s good to see you.”

Natasha smiled brightly. “I’ve been good. I’ve been really looking forward to this, I was so happy when you said yes. It feels like it’s been years since I’ve seen you.” You grinned slightly and she continued. “I’m sorry that it’s been so long since we’ve had a chance to catch up. Work has been keeping me even busier than usual. Stark has been working on all sorts of new tech developments and has somehow recruited me for testing.”

You nodded as you took a sip of your wine, “Nothing he’s made has killed you yet. That’s impressive.”

She snorted, “He’s lucky I didn’t flat out say no. His last update to the Falcon wings sent Wilson through the ceiling and landed him in the medbay for three days with a concussion.” Natasha noticed the look of concern on your face and waved her hand as she sipped on her wine. “He’s fine, don’t worry. All of the Avengers men have skulls harder than concrete.” The two of you burst into laughter at the thought.

A waiter arrived as your laughter died down to take your orders and to refill Natasha’s wine glass. You both thanked him as he turned to walk away. A quiet settled over the table and Natasha’s gaze landed firmly on you.

“So how have you been?” she asked softly, voice far gentler than anyone would expect from a former assassin. You shrugged and avoided eye contact.

“Some days are better than others,” you said, “Overall things are better than they’ve been for a while now though. My shrink has me on some new meds that seem to be helping and I’ve been working harder on doing little things to take care of myself every day, not just the good days.”

Natasha nodded, eyes still fixed on you. Slowly, she reached a hand out across the table and placed it on top of yours. “You know I’m always here for you, right? You can call me any time of day and as long as I’m not on a mission, I can be at your apartment within the hour.”

You felt a lump form in your throat at her words. You nodded quickly, eyes blinking fast to try and keep the tears that were welling up from falling. She gave your hand a quick squeeze before pulling back.

“Now where the hell are our breadsticks? This is going to be a failed meal if I have less than twelve in me before the main dish arrives.” Her words made you burst out laughing once again and succeeded in putting a smile on your face for the remainder of the meal.

                                        ***

“Are you sure I can’t drive you back to your apartment?” Natasha asked, wrapping her scarf around her neck as the two of you stepped out of the restaurant. You nodded at her and smiled.

“I enjoy walking, it clears my mind,” you said. She let out a disapproving hum but didn’t argue further. She pulled you into a bone-crushing hug before turning and walking towards where her car was parked. You watched as she stepped in and waved as she pulled out of the parking lot. You stood and watched until her car was out of sight before turning to start the walk home.

As it was on the walk to the restaurant, the busy streets provided the perfect background noise needed for you to quiet your mind. You focused on your breathing, allowing yourself to try and channel any residual nervous energy outward. With each breath, the faces passing by began to blur. Neon signs hanging in the windows of the shops you passed by became nothing more than a gentle glow in your peripheral. With each step you took, the background seamlessly blended together more and your focus on yourself heightened. A sense of calm settled itself in your chest. The feeling grew stronger with each block you passed until a small smile made its way onto your face. That feeling ended abruptly as you turned around the next block.  

There was a large crowd waiting at the bus stop, but your eyes focused on one man. You stared at his silhouette, panic building with each second. It felt like the wind had been knocked out of you and your feet had magically turned into cinder blocks. Is that...? No, it couldn’t be…

Almost as if he heard your thoughts, the man turned slightly so you could see his face, and a sigh of relief left you. You stood there a moment longer to examine his side profile. It wasn’t him; he just happened to look like him. He was about the same height and weight, with similar chocolate waves. Your eyes landed on his light brown leather jacket and a lump formed in your throat. He had worn a similar jacket the day you met. It felt like being thrown back in time as you continued to stare at the man in front of you.

Natasha drug you through a hallway, not caring about your protests to slow down. “I have someone I want you to meet.” She smirked as she spoke, leaving you to wonder what she was plotting.

A group of choices greeted the two of you as you entered the room. You waved at Steve and Sharon sitting on the couch as Natasha continued to pull you across the room to where two men were standing. One of the men was Sam, whom you had met the last time Natasha brought you to the compound. The other was Bucky Barnes. You hadn’t met him before but you knew who he was. It was impossible not to given how public everything about Hydra had become.

“Barnes, I have someone I’d like you to meet,” Natasha said, turning slightly towards you.

Bucky turned to look at you, offering a charming smile as he held out his hand. “Nice to meet you, ma’am. I’m Bucky.”

You shook his hand and introduced yourself, hoping to god you didn’t look as flustered as you felt. The pictures of him floating around on the news did not do him justice. Bucky was absolutely breathtaking. His smile lit up his eyes in a way no camera could ever hope to capture. His hair was cropped just above his shoulders, falling into a beautiful wavy pattern. You realized you were staring and felt your face get hot.

“Uh, I like your jacket,” you mumbled, hoping he hadn’t realized you were staring. The leather jacket was a beautiful light brown. It looked old, but well loved at the same time.

He smiled widely at you, “Thanks! Leather jackets are kind of my thing. Sam here thinks I have too many but there’s no such thing as too many leather jackets, wouldn’t you agree?”

As the memory floated away, you couldn’t help but think how Bucky probably would’ve gone up to the man to ask about his jacket. You chuckled at the thought. As soon as he walked away, he would’ve immediately started looking up where he could find one for his own closet. It didn’t matter how many leather jackets he had. He always wanted more.

The chuckle died on your lips and was replaced by an uncomfortable knot settling in your stomach. A heavy weight fell on your chest and you forced yourself to find the energy to trudge forward.

The remainder of the walk was a blur, but not in the same way it had been before. This wasn’t the good kind of blur that helped you to focus. It was the kind that left you feeling suffocated and as if everything would come crashing down all at once. That had been the first happy thought about Bucky since the two of you broke up. His presence in your thoughts was so strong, he might as well have been walking right next to you. You could practically feel his knuckles brushing against yours with each step you took. If you closed your eyes, you swore you could smell his cologne.

The harsh reality of how alone you were hit you as the greeting from your apartment’s doorman pulled you from your thoughts. You shot him a small smile before rushing inside and all but sprinting up the stairs. Your hands shook as you unlocked the door to your apartment, though you couldn't tell if it was from your thoughts of Bucky or from the sudden burst of energy that left you slightly winded.

Once inside, you rushed to your bedroom and changed into the first sports bra and pair of leggings you saw. You needed to get Bucky off your mind and the only way you knew how was to run. It was going to be a long run tonight.

The doorman waved at you again as you exited the building, surprised to see you again so soon. “Someone is feeling motivated today I see,” he joked. You shrugged and slowly began to jog.

                                        ***

It took a while to get into your groove, but once you were there you felt good. The movement helped settle the anxious energy that had been building since you had seen the man at the bus stop, while the steady breathing brought your focus back to the here and now just like it had before. That’s something else to mention if she asks about my runs again, you thought.  These runs bring my focus to this exact moment in time.

That thought was lost as you passed a small, hole in the wall theater. Small groups were exiting the building, each talking excitedly amongst themselves about the movie that had just finished. The nauseous feeling from earlier came back as memories resurfaced. That was Bucky’s favorite movie theater. Every Sunday they played movies from the 1920s and 1930s. He used to drag you along with him whenever he saw one he remembered from his childhood. Each time he swore up and down that you were about to experience a cinematic masterpiece like no other and that it would change the way you looked at movies. You always rolled your eyes as he said it, but the magic you felt in that theater with him was like no other.

Movies made back then were so different from the movies made now. The characters felt so much more real. They were allowed to be people. Their faults and flaws didn’t take away from the good things about them. These films never failed to make you feel all of the emotions you were meant to feel and each time you exited the theater, you couldn’t help but wish you could’ve remained in that little bubble just a few minutes longer. Those bittersweet feelings about the ending never lasted long though, as Bucky would wrap his arm around your shoulder and proceed to talk your ear off about the movie until you made it home.

“You know Doll, the greatest films of all time were never made,” he said, smiling down at you.

You just laughed and shook your head.“Bucky that makes absolutely no sense.”

Bucky rolled his eyes dramatically, making you laugh again. “Think about it though, how many movies haven’t been made because someone decided they weren’t good enough for the big screen? How many stories have been brought into existence but never been told to another living soul?”

A car horn brought you back into reality. Bitterness crept into your chest as you processed the memory that had just played out picture-perfect in your mind. Those afternoons with him in the theater had been some of the best afternoons of your life. Even if you weren’t crazy about the movie, Bucky’s sheer excitement about it was enough to convince you of how wonderful it truly was. If only he had felt that same amount of joy in other areas of your relationship.

Your bitterness slowly began to turn to anger as you thought about the last few months of being with Bucky. Sunday matinees had stopped being a regular thing as Bucky’s work schedule picked up until they stopped happening entirely. His new position training new SHIELD agents and prospective new members to the Avenger ate away at his time. All of his time. It got to the point Bucky never stopped working. Even at home, his thoughts were on paperwork to be filed, training to be planned, or meetings to be run. You’d be sitting on the couch next to him trying to talk only to receive disinterested “hmms” or the occasional “That’s nice honey.”

You tried bringing it up to no avail. He always brushed it off and said things would calm down eventually and that he just needed you to hold out a bit longer. He never outright said his work was more important to him but the implication was there and you felt the weight of it every single day. You bit your tongue and played along for a while, but after several months of hearing the same excuses, you finally snapped. Unfortunately, so did Bucky.

“All you ever do is work. I can’t remember the last time we went and did something together. Hell, I can’t even remember the last time you cared enough to even ask me about my day. It’s like you don’t even want me around anymore,” you hissed, glaring at Bucky.

“Excuse me for caring about my fucking job. One of us has to if we’re going to continue affording this place,” he scoffed.

Ice filled your veins as you stared at him, fist clenched at your side. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Oh come on, we both know you’re barely getting your work done on time. You lay here on the couch all day watching TV. You’re lucky you’re allowed to work from home because you look like a walking disaster half the time. You’ve stopped wearing clean clothes, you hardly shower, you hardly eat, and you hardly sleep. Face it, you’re depressed.” His voice was flat as he spoke.

You furiously blinked back tears that were trying to well up as you processed his words. “First of all, I am not depressed,” you muttered, “Second, if I’m such a walking disaster then what are you even still doing here?”

“I am still here because I care about you. I have lost track of how many times I have asked you to get help. I’ve been where you are, I know what you’re going through and I know what it takes to come back from it. If you never bleed, you’re never going to grow. If you can’t move past this, then we -” he paused to motion between the two of you “- can’t move past this.” His eyes never left yours as he spoke. There was no malice in them, but there was also none of the kindness or warmth you wished for. His gaze just felt indifferent.  

You remained silent as you tried to find words. Bucky continued watching you, waiting expectantly for a response. A response never came, however, and he let out a loud sigh.

“If you don’t have anything to say to that, then I think we’re done here. I can’t keep doing this anymore. I love you, but neither of us is happy. I can’t give you what you want and you can’t give me what I need,” Without another word, Bucky grabbed his coat and walked out the front door of the apartment.

That was the last time that you saw Bucky. He had sent you a text a few days later asking when a good time to come pick up his stuff would be. You responded begrudgingly, telling yourself that the sooner his stuff was gone the sooner your life could get back to normal. When the day came, you forced yourself to get out of the apartment. The thought of seeing him after what went down between you left you seeing red. When you finally went back after he left, you felt none of the happy emotions you had convinced yourself you would feel.

Instead, you felt the empty spots in the room. Every missing item you noticed felt like a blow to the stomach and caused fresh tears to well up in your eyes. Pictures were no longer hanging from the walls; random gaps were in the bookshelves; his leather jacket was no longer slung across the back of the chair he loved in the living room. You stumbled back to your room with your eyes closed, refusing to see what other memories had been ripped from their rightful homes. Once there, you collapsed on the bed and laid there for two days. It wasn’t until Natasha broke into your apartment to check on you after countless missed calls and ignored texts that you finally moved from that spot.

For the millionth time that day, your stomach twisted as thoughts of Bucky floated around in your head. Despite it all, you regretted not being there when he came to get his things. There was never a proper goodbye between you and the thought drove you mad sometimes. Maybe if I had been there, we could’ve worked this out. You scoffed at the thought, but couldn’t deny the heaviness lingering in your chest.

At times you considered reaching out to him, wondering if he would be willing to give you the closure you so desperately needed. Even if it was just over text, it might be better than the nothing you currently had. You still had his number. The two of you even still followed each other on social media. He liked what few posts you made, but you had never been able to bring yourself to look at the stuff he posted. The lines of communication were there, you just had to use them. But communication is a two-way street; if he wanted to talk to you, he’d reach out. Right? That thought had kept you from texting him more times than you could possibly count.

Questions about what could have happened that day swirled throughout your head as your feet pounded against the pavement. Could you have fixed things, or would it still have ended in breaking up? Could you have agreed to still be friends? Would you have at least been able to say goodbye, or would he have walked silently out the door again?

The thoughts continued to plague you until the ache in your legs was too strong to take another step. Out of breath, you looked around at where you stopped trying to figure out how far you had run. It wasn’t until you noticed the fountain about a dozen feet behind you that you realized where you were.

Tony had once rented out a plaza nearby for a 1920s themed fundraiser gala the first year you and Bucky were dating. The gala was the first public event you ever attended with him, though it certainly hadn’t been your last. Natasha had taken you shopping and helped you find a flapper-style dress leading up to it. The two of you did your hair and makeup together, giggling about how you felt like you were getting ready for a high school dance. When you stepped out of the room with Natasha, Bucky wasn’t able to speak. He spent the whole night staring at you like a lovestruck teenager, only to turn bright red whenever someone mentioned it.

Towards the end of the night, you and Bucky had drunkenly stumbled out of the plaza to escape the crowd and found your way over to this fountain. Rather, you had stumbled out drunkenly. Bucky wasn’t affected by human alcohol and hardly had any of the Asgardian mead Thor had so generously brought. While he was a little more cheery than usual, he wasn’t intoxicated enough to even pretend like he was tipsy.

A giggle left your lips as you stumbled forward. “Bucky, I need to find somewhere to sit down. I need to take off my heels.”

Bucky laughed at you and picked you up, carrying you bridal style. He spun around slowly as he searched for somewhere he could set you down. His eyes eventually settled on the fountain and began walking towards it. He carefully set you down before sitting down next to you. His eyes were fixed on you as you took off your shoes, a sigh of relief leaving your mouth as you did. You smiled over at him, before turning around to stare at the fountain in wonder. A giggle left your lips as you pulled up your dress and began walking around in the fountain.

You laughed any time you went through a jet of water. The temperature difference was soothing against your skin and almost left a tickling sensation as you passed. Eventually, you arrived back at where he was sitting and the smile on his face filled your stomach with butterflies. You bent down slightly to press your lips against his, your hands making their way through his hair. His hands landed on your hips and pulled you closer to him. You felt dizzy as he held you, though you weren’t sure if it was him or the glasses of champagne. You pulled away abruptly as an idea struck you, leading to Bucky’s eyes opening in confusion. His gaze fell upon the mischievous look you wore and he opened his mouth to speak. Before he managed to make a sound, your hands left his hair and were reaching down to splash water onto him.

He tried to catch your hands to stop you, but you stepped back just out of reach, but not far enough you couldn’t keep splashing him. Without a word, he reached down to take off his shoes and socks. A gasp left you as he stepped into the fountain and you rushed to hide behind the fountain’s centerpiece. He chased after you, hands eventually catching your waist and spinning you around to face him. He stared down at you, wonder and adoration written on his face. He slowly leaned forward to press his lips against yours.

The dizzy feeling from before came back, though this time you could say with absolute certainty it was because of the man standing in front of you. His lips were so soft against yours, yet still carried such a force they left you breathless. Fireworks had nothing on how he made you feel. No words could ever hope to describe the love and adoration bursting in your chest.

This time, he was the one to pull back first. He moved his lips up slightly, pressing a kiss to your nose and your forehead before leaning his head against yours. “Would you like to dance?”

You nodded and the two of you began to slow dance in the fountain. You don’t know how long you were in the fountain dancing; it felt like eternity paused to give you and your love all the time the universe had to give so you could enjoy this moment a little longer. The only sensations tying you to reality were Bucky’s warmth and the cool water moving at your feet as Bucky spun you around. You pulled away slightly and smiled at him. “We should make a wish,” you said.

Bucky looked at you with confusion. “A wish?”

You nodded, a small smile filling your face, “You know, toss some coins into the fountain and make a wish as we do.”

The laugh that left his lips made your heart flutter. “I don’t think this is a wishing-well. Although -” he paused to laugh again, “-I hardly think they meant for anyone to dance around in it either, so why not.” One of his hands left yours and reached into his pocket, looking for his wallet. He opened it and pulled out two pennies and handed one to you. “It looks like we only get one wish each tonight, so we’d better make it a good one.”

You stared down at the penny in your hand, wondering what wish could possibly be better than the night you were currently having with Bucky. The wish hit you suddenly, a smile breaking out on your face. You pressed your lips to the penny and wished with all your might, ‘I wish for us to have more moments like this together, from now through the rest of our days”. You opened your eyes and tossed the penny outward. Bucky’s coin was soon nestled safely at the bottom of the fountain with yours.

“What did you wish for?” he asked, pulling you back into his arms to continue dancing.

“I can’t tell you or it won’t come true,” you teased, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek as he spun you. “And let me tell you, I really want this wish to come true.”

Bucky chuckled, “Me too honey, me too.”

Your eyes came back into focus and a quiet sob left you. You stood in front of the fountain and cried into your hands, cursing all of the emotions you felt. That night had left you convinced that Bucky Barnes was the one. You had fallen asleep dreaming of dancing like that with him at your wedding. But now? Now all you wanted to do was scream. You wanted to scream at him, at yourself, and at the universe for being cruel enough to lead you back to this fountain without him at your side.

As the tears began to slow, a new kind of weight settled in your chest. He really could have been the one. He could have been everything you dreamed of and more, but there was nothing you could do to go back in time to change things. He decided to walk out that door and leave you with nothing more than an empty space in your heart, one to match the empty spaces he left in your apartment.

The questions the therapist had asked you started ringing through your ears as you continued to stare blankly at the fountain. What about the ‘after’? Maybe she had a point bringing it up today. You were still stuck in the ‘before’. Maybe it was finally time to start moving on. Missing items could be replaced; missing love could be given by someone else. All you had to do was make the decision to take your first steps into the ‘after’.

Your feet remained glued in place as you tried to make sense of it all.

You were confused as to where you were. Looking around, nothing seemed familiar. It wasn’t until a familiar silhouette caught your attention that you realized where you were. Bucky stood at the top of the mountain, staring down at the canyon below. Green trees and bushes lined the ground and the air was filled with the sound of birds chirping. The view was beautiful, but you couldn’t stop staring at Bucky. He looked the same, yet something felt different. Bucky seemed calmer than you had seen him in years, almost as if all of his stress had faded away. His body language was relaxed and he seemed to be in no rush to leave where he was.

Suddenly, the once green mountain top was now covered in a blanket of snow. Bucky was now wearing a thick winter coat and was strapping his feet onto a snowboard. He soon had his helmet and goggles on and began his descent down the mountain. It felt like you were flying along with him as you watched him expertly weave his way through the trees. The ease at which he moved confused you. Since when did Bucky know how to snowboard? He expressed wanting to try but never had while you were together. Confusion clouded your mind until Bucky reached the bottom of the mountain and came to a halt. He removed his helmet and a look of pure exhilaration filled his face. His excitement made your heart burst. As you reached out to try and touch him, the scene changed once again.

This time you were in the middle of the ocean. The vast expanse of blue was the only visible thing in sight other than Bucky. He was in full scuba gear, just floating there waiting. He was so still that if it weren't for the stream of bubbles that came with each exhale, you wouldn’t have been able to tell if he was breathing. Out of nowhere, a shape appeared in the distance. As it got closer, you felt your stomach drop. A large shark swam slowly towards Bucky. You rolled your eyes at the realization. Of course, he would go swimming with sharks with no safety cage. That idiot had no respect for your nerves or your -

You were woken up abruptly by the sound of your phone ringing. You groaned and cursed yourself for it somehow not being on silent. In your confused state, you reached out and slowly felt around on the top of your nightstand trying to find your phone. Once you found it, you tilted the screen so you could see who was calling. A beautiful picture of Natasha filled your screen and you sighed. Only Natasha could call randomly and happen to wake you up from a dream about Bucky. You pressed the answer button and begrudgingly brought the phone to your ear.

“Morning, you better have a good reason for waking me up,” you mumbled, letting out a yawn as you finished speaking.

“It’s past noon, you know. Most decent people are already up by now,” You could hear the smile in her voice as she spoke.

“Shut up. It’s still morning if I haven’t gotten out of bed yet. What do you want? I was having a nice dream.”

Your gruff response got a laugh from Natasha. “Well I was calling to see how your Tinder date went last night, but now I’m wondering if I should be asking what you were dreaming about that has you being this testy,” she teased.

You rubbed your eyes and groaned, “The dream was nothing special, I’m just mad you woke me up. The Tinder date was also nothing to write home about. The guy was awful. He started off super charming like they always do, but he got snappy with our waitress and then tried to get snappy with me when I called him out on it. I paid for my half of the bill and left as quickly as I could.”

“Ugh, gross. Men are actually the worst,” Natasha said. You hummed in agreement and she continued, “So are you ready for me to start setting you up, or are you going to keep giving these Tinder people a try?”

You sighed and paused for a moment to think. “Nat, I know you’re trying to help but the only people you have that you can set me up with are all SHIELD employees. I don’t see it ending well if I go down that path given my prior dating history.”

A scoff came through the phone. “He’s dating again too, so he has no right to be pissy about anything if that’s what you’re worried about. Besides, he was also the one who ended it so he doubly has no right to be upset.”

You sat up straight as she spoke, your stomach dropping at the thought. “He’s dating again?” Your voice sounded small, smaller than it had in ages.

This time it was Natasha’s turn to pause before responding. “Yes. He’s taken a few of the receptionists here out on coffee dates, but nothing seems to be sticking. If Wilson is to be believed, he’s also on Tinder. I can’t imagine that’s working out very well for him either though.”

You felt nauseous, but you forced yourself to pause to recenter your thoughts. Of course he would be dating again. It’s been almost a year since you broke up. If you’re dating again, it only makes sense that he is as well. He deserves to be happy too. A heavy sigh left you, “Well, I hope he’s having better luck than I am.”

                                        ***

You were on the phone with Natasha for another twenty minutes before she had to go. It felt nice catching up with her, and the two of you made plans for another lunch get together later in the week. The conversation had quickly transitioned away from dating, but the fact Bucky was dating again lingered in the back of your mind for the entirety of the call.

You had been on Tinder for a while now, but somehow it never occurred to you that he might be too. How does a superhero just casually join the worst dating app in existence? Do people actually believe it’s him when they come across his profile? You couldn’t help but snort at the thought. Conversations on dating apps sucked enough as it is, but having to try and prove you’re who you say you are the way Bucky must have to certainly would make it that much less enjoyable.

Almost as if it knew you were thinking about it, a Tinder notification popped up on your lock screen. You opened up the app and saw two new messages from someone you had matched with. You typed out a response and then proceeded to scroll through the list of other potential matches. Most of the profiles you looked at were immediate no’s, but there were a few you swiped right on. It never ceased to amaze you how bad the men on this app were at smiling in pictures. Most of them had only a slight grin in one or two pictures. Any profile with a man properly smiling almost always got a swipe right. The only other type of picture that had that sort of response was for cute cats and dogs.

You continued to swipe, pausing occasionally to respond to a message. Out of nowhere, a familiar pair of blue eyes started staring up at you, causing you to nearly drop your phone in surprise. Of course the day you find out Bucky is on Tinder is the day you come across his profile. You quickly took a screenshot before swiping left and exiting out of the app. You sent the screenshot to Natasha. She responded almost immediately, Guess Wilson was telling the truth 🙄

You laughed at her response as you got out of bed, ready to finally start your day.

                                        ***

A sigh of relief left you as you collapsed on your couch after spending most of the afternoon running errands. It hadn’t been anything too bad, but that didn’t stop you from being thankful it was over. You laid there for a few minutes, just enjoying the stillness and the comfort of being on your couch. Once settled, you reached over to the coffee table and grabbed the glass of wine you had poured, and opened up your phone.

You opened up Snapchat and responded to the few snaps you had from Natasha and other friends before opening up Instagram. You mindlessly watched people’s stories, skipping through any of the ones that didn’t interest you. You paused however on Bucky’s.

He was standing next to a beautiful woman, each of them holding a painting in one hand and a glass of wine in the other. Both of them had smiles that filled their faces. You stared at the picture, unsure of what you should be feeling. On one hand, it was nice seeing him so relaxed and happy. His posture reminded you eerily of how he looked in your dream. On the other hand, you couldn’t help but feel a touch of bitterness. You had practically begged him to go with you to a wine and paint night while you were together. He always used work as an excuse, either he was too tired from work or he had too much work left to do. You stared at the picture for a minute longer, wondering if they’d be going home together or parting ways for the night. You sighed, shaking your head at your own stupidity before continuing to scroll.

The wind blew violently around you as you struggled to make your way up the street. The weather turned unexpectedly as you were out on your run, so you rushed towards the closest coffee shop hoping to wait out the weather and avoid having to pay for a cab back home. The barista greeted you as you stepped inside and you offered her a smile.

“What can I get for you?” she asked.

You stared up at the menu, considering your options. “One large hazelnut latte and a cinnamon roll, please.”

She entered everything into the computer and you held out your card for her. Once your payment was processed, you turned to find a seat. The coffee shop was crowded, no doubt due to the bad weather driving people indoors. You looked around unsuccessfully and had almost resigned yourself to standing when a familiar voice called out.

You jumped at the sound. You turned around and made eye contact with Bucky Barnes for the first time since he walked out your front door. He was sitting there grinning ear to ear, almost as if he was genuinely happy to see you. The thought made your heart burst and it was impossible to hold back an equally big smile.

“Hey Bucky, how’s it going?”

“It’s going really well! Thanks for asking,” he paused and looked around before continuing, “Do you want to sit down? There’s not a lot of seating left and it’s just me here.” His hand gestured towards the empty seat across from him as he spoke.

You paused, unsure of if you should take it or continue to look elsewhere. You looked around the room for an empty seat but didn’t see any. Well, I guess we’re doing this. You stepped forward and mumbled out a thanks as you sat down.

“I’m kind of surprised to see you here if I’m honest. I didn’t think you came to this part of the city very often,” he said, taking a sip of his coffee. You couldn’t help but laugh.

“I generally don’t. The weather took a bit of a nasty turn while I was out on my run. I stepped in hoping that by the time I’m ready to leave it’ll have calmed down.”

Another smile broke out across his face as you spoke. “You’re running again? That’s awesome.” He sounded sincere as he spoke which made you smile back.

You nodded, but before you could respond the barista arrived with your coffee and cinnamon roll. You thanked her and took a long sip of your coffee, enjoying the warmth you felt as you did. An awkward silence filled the air as both of you tried to size the other up. You decided to break the silence.

“So, what’s new with you?”

                                        ***

An hour later, the two of you were still chatting away happily at the table. Once the conversation started, it didn’t stop. Everything felt like it had at the start of your relationship: easy, comfortable, and filled with excitement. The only pauses that occurred were when the barista refilled both of your coffees and brought Bucky a cinnamon roll, which he ordered after you spent five minutes going on about how incredible it was.

One of the things you had forgotten about being around Bucky was the warmth he exuded. Even on his worst days, he had the unwavering ability to make the room feel safe. You couldn’t ever quite pin down whether it had to do with his cologne being a comforting smell or if that’s just who he was. All you knew is that he always left you aching to lean into his chest and stay there until you absolutely couldn’t. Needless to say, today it left you feeling quite confused given everything that had happened between you.

The thoughts you had several months ago about getting closure were brought back to the forefront of your mind. How had things gotten so bad between you? How had both of you let this wonderful thing fall to pieces without even one final attempt at holding it together? Each little pause in the conversation as you transitioned between topics left you aching to ask all of the questions you had. Everything was so easy and so smooth between you today that you almost felt hope that things were salvageable between you. Maybe, just maybe, your fountain wish could still come true. As you were finally working up the courage to ask, his next sentence knocked all other thoughts out of your head.

“Did you hear that Steve and Sharon are finally engaged? Took that meathead long enough to ask.”

A gasp left your mouth, “No way! It’s about freaking time. Have they picked a date yet?”

He nodded. “First weekend in June. Sharon’s already picked their wedding colors too; sage green and rose gold. She explicitly said she picked rose gold because she wants to serve that rosé champagne you introduced her to. It’s still her favorite to this day.”

A bittersweet smile made its way onto your face as you thought about what he said. You had brought two bottles of that sparking rosé to a dinner Sharon hosted once, back when she and Steve were still circling around their feelings for each other. Sharon had barely taken her first sip before asking you for details on where you bought it. Ever since, Sharon always had a bottle in her fridge. Her friendship was the one you missed the most after the breakup. There had been a few half-hearted attempts from both of you to reach out, but each time her responses felt forced. Eventually you stopped trying.

“Well, I’m sure it’ll be a beautiful wedding. They deserve it,” you said. A chuckle left your lips as a new thought entered your head. “How on Earth is Steve going to choose between you and Sam for best man?”

Bucky joined in on your laughter, making your stomach do summersault after summersault. “Sam and I were actually wondering the same thing, but apparently they’ve decided to not do a bridal party. That makes things easy for me though. I get to kick back and enjoy the wedding knowing I have no responsibilities.”

The idea of Bucky having a blast at a wedding made you smile. The smile faded slightly as you realized this meant Bucky was now going to need a date for this wedding. Images of him in a fancy suit, twirling another woman around the way he had in the fountain with you flashed before your eyes. You felt your heart breaking all over again at the thought of how it could’ve been you if you hadn’t fucked it all up. How stupid could you have been thinking the two of you could talk things out after all this time. He’s probably already planning on asking that girl from the wine and paint night to go with him. She had appeared on his social media several times since that night and each time it made your chest ache a little more. Bucky’s voice broke you from your thoughts.

“Hey, you okay?”

You swallowed thickly and nodded. You tried smiling but felt yourself falter and knew he noticed it too. “Yeah, just caught up in my thoughts.” You needed to get out of here and fast. Conveniently, your phone screen lit up and you were able to fake gasp at the time. “Oh my god, look how late it is. I really should get going.”

Bucky stared at you, unsure of how to respond to the sudden change in the atmosphere. You stood and rushed to collect your things.

“It was really nice seeing you again Bucky,” you said, offering him a half-smile as you take your first steps away from the table. He nodded, still looking unconvinced.

“It really was. Maybe we could do this again sometime?” He asked, trying his hardest to keep too much optimism from creeping into his voice.

Your eyes went wide with surprise, but you slowly nodded. “Yeah, maybe.”

The same awkward silence from before filled the air, only this time neither of you seemed to know how to break it. You offered a small wave and made your way out the door, refusing to turn around and hug him despite how strongly your body was screaming at you to do so.

Bucky stood there staring after you until you were out of sight. A sigh left him after you rounded a corner and he began to collect his things.

                                        ***

Bucky had made his way back to the Avengers compound with relative ease, though his mind was still stuck back at the coffee shop with you. He had nearly choked on his coffee when he saw you walk in and hardly realized what he was doing when he called out to you. His mind had started screaming at him from the second he offered you a seat and apparently had yet to find a good enough reason to stop. Talking to you had been magical. He had forgotten how well the two of you meshed once a conversation was started. Nobody else had ever been able to keep up with his constant jumping between topics, not even Sam and Steve. You never made him feel bad for his quick transitions; you just understood and accepted that was the way his mind worked. Even after all that time, you took it all in stride.

An unexpected slam of a cabinet door caught his attention as he made his way through the communal kitchen. Sam was standing there, unloading dishes from the dishwasher. Bucky greeted the man with a gentle nod of the head as he pulled out one of the barstools to sit.

“That was a long coffee shop visit, you run into a cute girl there?” Sam teased, smirk playing across his face.

“I ran into her.”

Sam’s motions paused as he processed Bucky’s words. He looked up at his friend, who was conveniently not meeting his gaze, unsure of how to respond. “Her as in…?”

Bucky nodded and Sam let out a slow puff of air. “How are you feeling?” Sam asked cautiously.

It took a few minutes for Bucky to find the words. “You know Sammy, I actually don’t know. There are too many contradictory feelings in my head to pinpoint just one.” He finally looked up and met Sam’s eyes.

Sam motioned for him to continue.

“It was so nice to see her again and talk to her. It made me feel like things were back when we were both still head over heels in love with each other. She’s doing so well. She’s made huge progress mentally, she’s been given a promotion at work, she’s just out there living her life. It made me so happy to see...

“But the happier I got sitting there talking to her, the angrier I got with myself for being such an ass while I was with her. Who has a woman like that in their life and chooses to ignore her for work? What kind of jerk does that?” He paused for a moment, staring down at his feet before continuing.

“There was a moment where she looked at me and I looked at her and I just knew we were both wondering where the hell we went so wrong. She looked like she wanted to say something so badly, but decided against it and just...got up and left. I kinda deserved it though-” he let out a dark chuckle, “- it’s what I did to her after all.”

Sam had continued unloading the dishes as Bucky spoke, trying to keep things casual while he got everything off his chest. Once Sam knew Bucky was done, he paused and rested both hands on the counter to give his friend his full attention.

“Yeah, you were an ass who put work first. She was a great girl who loved you unconditionally. You let her down and yourself down too. But she also had her issues that contributed to what happened. It’s not all on you.” Sam shot a reassuring smile at Bucky.

Bucky nodded, knowing Sam was right. He couldn’t help but sigh and put his head in his hands though as more thoughts swirled around in his head. “I can’t help but think about how my actions probably worsened things for her though, you know? She was depressed for a while before I started acting that way, but I certainly didn’t help the situation. And just...I walked out on her. I walked out and didn’t even give her a proper goodbye.”

Sam stood still and nodded along. “You did, but what you’re forgetting is that you also did because it was also the best thing for you at the time. Both of you were unhappy with who the other was becoming at that time. Sometimes breaking up is the best route to take and they don’t always end with a clear-cut goodbye. You guys may have missed out on some closure, but if today went as well as you said it did, maybe you’ve got a different kind of closure coming down the pipe.”

Bucky’s eyebrows furrowed and he looked up at his friend. “What do you mean?”

Sam rolled his eyes and laughed softly, “Man, what did your dumb ass do with girls before I came along?” He continued laughing for a moment before resuming, “What I’m getting at is that if today went as well as you think before the awkward ending, what if there’s a possibility of reconciling? Even if it’s not in a romantic sense, you could always try and be friends.”

For a moment, Bucky’s heart surged. Maybe Sam was right, maybe things could be fixed. He knew things were going well before you got up to leave, maybe he could try and make things right.

Then, the memory of how uneasy and uncomfortable you looked at the end of the conversation replayed in his mind. He felt his throat tighten and tears well up in his eyes. You didn’t want him back. He had his chance today and he blew it.

He shook his head slowly and whispered, “I don’t think that’s going to happen, Sammy.”

                                        ***

Sam eventually let the topic drop and Bucky was free to make his way back to his rooms. A familiar meow rang out from across the room and was soon followed by the sound of excited footsteps rushing towards him. Alpine rubbed himself against Bucky’s legs, meowing expectantly. He chuckled and crouched down to rub Alpine’s ears.

“Hey there buddy, did you miss me?”

Alpine meowed, almost as if to say yes. Bucky smiled and picked up the cat before standing up. He made his way to his bedroom and let Alpine jump down onto the bed once they were close enough. His boots were kicked off haphazardly at the foot of the bed before he climbed into bed. Alpine came and curled up under one of his arms, purring slightly as he did. A sigh left him as he mindlessly pet the cat and adjusted his position until he was comfortable.

Bucky’s thoughts turned back to you almost immediately. His heart ached as he began to relive the night he knew he had fallen in love with you. How he wished he could go back in time and experience it all over again.

“So, Stark is holding a fundraiser in about three weeks. I was wondering if you’d like to come with me?” Bucky asked.

The smile on your face made his heart flutter. “Of course! What’s the dress code?” you asked. “I’m not sure if I have anything fancy enough to wear to a Stark gala.”

“It’s a 1920s theme. I’m not entirely sure what he means by that though, considering I was barely old enough to remember the first half of the decade.”

A teasing smile broke out across your face as he spoke. “So what you're telling me is the oldest man in the room somehow still isn’t old enough to remember the roaring twenties? Tsk tsk,” Your teasing tone made him laugh and lean over to kiss you.

“I’ll have you know young lady -” he paused to place kisses all over your face “- this is a completely unacceptable thing to say. Don’t you know you should respect your elders?” You continued to giggle as he continued to kiss you.

                                        ***

On the day of the gala, you were whisked away early in the day by Natasha. She claimed the whole day was needed to properly prepare, which left Bucky standing there rolling his eyes. But when you finally stepped out of the elevator into the lobby of the compound, Bucky felt his heart stop. You looked ethereal. The flapper style dress you were wearing fit you perfectly, your hair was elegantly framing your face, and your lips were painted the most perfect shade of red he had ever seen. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you the entire night.

By the end of the night, the champagne finally had gone to your head and you were desperate to leave. You grabbed his hand giggling, rushing as quickly as you could out of the reserved plaza. You stumbled a few times over the uneven cobblestones, so he kept a hand on your waist just in case.

“Bucky, I need to find somewhere to sit down. I need to take off my heels.” you giggled as you spoke, making his heart flutter for the millionth time that night. Without a word, he picked you up bridal style and slowly spun around as he searched for somewhere you could sit.

His eyes landed on a large fountain a short distance away and he began walking towards it. You settled comfortably into his arms, with one hand sneaking under his tux jacket and gripping gently onto his shirt just over his heart. Bucky wondered if you could tell it was about ready to beat out of his chest as he leaned slightly to set you down on the fountain’s edge. He had hardly sat down next to you before your heels were kicked off. It was amazing how much more relaxed you looked just from doing that.

He was so focused on how beautiful you looked he almost didn’t hear you giggle or realize what you were about to do. His jaw dropped slightly as you stood in front of him in the fountain, dress pulled up slightly as you waded in.

Bucky’s eyes never left you as you walked around, letting out the cutest laughs with each stream of water that you walked under. When you arrived back at where he was sitting and his whole world stopped as you bent forward to press your sweet lips against his. Your hands found their way to his hair as his made their way to your hips. With every ounce of his being, he wished his hands could make their home. They belonged there, allowing him to hold you so tightly against him it was almost impossible to tell where his body stopped and yours began.

It startled him when you pulled away suddenly, but the confusion didn’t last long as he was met with a handful of water and mischievous laughter. The splashing was relentless. You refused to stop despite him begging for you to quit it. He rushed to remove his shoes and socks so he could jump into the fountain with you. The excited squeal that left your mouth as you started rushing through the water trying to escape him made him grin. He was going to catch you and you knew it. That didn’t stop you from trying to delay the inevitable though. You tried to hide behind the fountain's centerpiece and to fake which direction you were going to run. When you decided to leave the safety of the centerpiece, he had you back in his arms facing him within seconds.

As he watched your face, the overwhelming urge to confess the extent of his feelings filled his chest. He loved you. He had known for weeks now, but staring at your beautiful face reaffirmed it so deeply in his soul that it felt like an integral part of who he was now. Bucky opened his mouth to speak, but the words failed him. Instead, he leaned forward and he channeled everything he had into a kiss. He wanted this to be the kind of kiss written about in fairytales; one that leaves audiences tearing up over and longing for. He hoped you felt everything he didn’t have the courage to say tonight and the small voice in his head hoped you felt the same.

He felt you smile into the kiss, making his heart swell. He pulled away gently after a moment, staying close enough to press kisses across your face. You had told him once how special you felt when he did it; now he couldn't stop doing it. He needed you to know how special you were to him, how loved you were in his arms. When he was satisfied, he rested his forehead against yours. An idea struck him and he smiled at you, “Would you like to dance?”

You nodded and he began to lead you in a slow dance throughout the fountain. He had never felt more grateful for the dancing experience he gained in his youth and that it was a skill he somehow kept throughout the years of brainwashing and torture. The feeling of your body against his calmed his mind and kept his focus from wandering back to the past. The only thing he wanted to think about right now was how beautiful you were and how lucky he was to have you.

After a few minutes of him leading you aimlessly around the fountain, you pulled away gently and looked up at him with a smile. “We should make a wish.”

His face twisted with confusion. “A wish?”

You smiled as you nodded at him, “You know, toss some coins into the fountain and make a wish as we do.”

Bucky laughed as he thought about how much like a fairytale this night was turning into. Apparently his kiss had done the trick. “I don’t think this is a wishing-well. Although -” he chuckled again, “-I hardly think they meant for anyone to dance around in it either, so why not.”

Reluctantly, he let go of your hand and fished around in his pocket until he found his wallet. He’d never felt more relieved to see pennies in his life as he pulled out the only two coins he had. He pressed one into your hand as he leaned in to kiss your forehead. “It looks like we only get one wish each tonight, so we’d better make it a good one.”

He watched as you stared down at the penny, wondering what wish you were going to make. Your face was serious as you thought but broke out into the most beautiful smile. You stood there, coin pressed to your lips, before tossing it out into the fountain. You stared up at him expectantly, waiting for him to make his wish.

He didn’t need to stop and think about his wish. He knew what his wish was from the day he met you. Following your motions, he pressed the penny to his lips and wished, ‘I wish for a life filled with more wonderful nights like this, with this beautiful woman in my arms’. He tossed the coin in and his hand found its way back into yours.

Without a word, he pulled you back in close to him and resumed leading you around the fountain. After a few moments of peaceful silence, he spoke.

“What did you wish for?”

“I can’t tell you or it won’t come true,” you said, voice teasing as you pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. “And let me tell you, I really want this wish to come true.”

“Me too honey, me too.”

As the memory faded, Bucky couldn’t help but let the tears that had been building fall. That night had been so wonderful. You deserve someone who could give you nothing but nights like that, not the heartache he put you through. He closed his eyes and whispered to no one but himself, “You could’ve been the one. You should’ve been the one...”

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel fanfiction

[aipilosse]

I don't know if you're still doing the ask prompts, but I saw you'd already filled the one I'd put for Mae Squared before so I thought I'd pick a different one so you didn't have to do the same one twice. I was thinking maybe 15? But only if you're still doing them/want to! Thanks for all the lovley writing you give to the fandom!

Yes I am! My first attempt at Maedhros/Sauron AKA Mae Squared, and the prompt ‘Out of your element’ from this prompt list. Rated Teen or so for, ya know, Angband.

There were so many different layers of misery in Angband. 

There was the misery of torture of course, of having the flesh torn from his back with spiked whips until he passed out from blood loss, only to have the whips brought out again when he was half healed. There was the horrible pain of glowing metal set to his flesh until he thought his bones must be singed, all the while his tormenters asked for answers he did not know and had never known. There was the misery of constant humiliation, sometimes as a method of torment, but also the just the daily degradation as he was denied clothes and the filth on his body built up, until he felt lower than a worm. 

He also learned that misery could be delivered just as well through neglect. At first, he thought he could bear hunger, but as the years passed and he saw his body waste before his eyes, the gnawing pain in his gut became harder and harder to bear. The pain of thirst moved faster; he soon learned that even if he had been allowed a cup of bitter, oily water, in just a few hours Maitimo’s throat would be burning. He would wait for days with his awful thirst in whatever position he had been chained in, the ache in his joints and the cramps in his muscles growing into agony.

Misery sank into his bones, until it seemed to encompass his past, his present, and his future. When they came to unchain him from the horrible crouch he had been kept in for several days, Maitimo felt a brief moment of relief despite the more logical part of his mind that told him he was being released only for further pain. The four orcs sent to escort him had to drag him; his legs refused to move after being locked in place for so long.

When the walls changed from the rough texture of the caves he was usually moved between to smooth dark stone, Maitimo felt his dread grow. The only time he was taken this far above ground was when he was taken to Morgoth, and that was the worst misery by far in Angband. The Vala’s piercing eyes and terrible burning spirit seemed able to torment his mind as much as whips tormented his body.

He wasn’t brought to the throne room. Instead, they stopped in front of a pair of iron bound double doors.

“We have a guest for Lord Mairon,” one of the orcs said.

The guard at the door peered at him suspiciously. “My lord did not tell me he was expecting any visitors.”

“Order from the Mighty One,” the orc replied.

“He’s not going to like this,” the guard warned, but rapped on the door with his spear anyway.

“What?” The flat question came from inside the room.

“Lord Melkor has sent you a visitor.”

There was a sound that seemed penetrate Maitimo’s very being; whatever was on the other side of that door wasn’t pleased. “Make it quick.”

Maitimo didn’t know what he expected as he was dragged through the door, but whatever it was, it wasn’t this. The floor was carpeted, the plush surface unbelievably soft against feet that had only felt stone for years. The room was diffused with light, the soft glow of candles magnified by crystals and colored glass. The large room seemed to be divided into different purposes — Maitimo could have sworn he saw goldsmithing tools at a workbench and another corner with glass containers filled with multi-colored liquids — before he was thrown to the ground.

“Kneel,” snarled the orc, as if it was possible for Maitimo to do anything else. He bowed to Mairon. “The Mighty One says you must interrogate him.”

“Oh really? I must interrogate him? As if I have nothing better to do with my time than question a useless prisoner? I suppose requisitions, excavations, and the logistics of arming our entire host is not enough?” Mairon’s low musical voice was at odds with the sharp sarcasm of his tone. Maitimo watched his guards shuffle awkwardly from his spot on the ground.

“Get out. And if you breathe a word of what I said, I will slowly boil you from the inside out.” The orcs beat a hasty retreat, and then they were alone. Maitimo didn’t look up; whatever horrors were in store for him would happen whatever he did.

“Well, have a seat, I’ll get to you in a moment.” That at least grabbed Maitimo’s attention. He peered up from his spot on the floor. Mairon wasn’t looking at him at all; his entire focus was on whatever he was writing. Maitimo almost gasped out loud; Mairon was stunning. Red hair, a deeper shade than any he had seen tumbled around his shoulders. The golden flame of his eyes was mesmerizing. Maitimo swallowed; he already felt horribly out of place and filthy in the rich, pristine chambers. Now he felt like a twisted creature compared to the being before him. 

But he had been asked to take a seat. Earlier, he would have fought even the smallest order in Angband, but now he knew there was no point in resisting this reasonable request. Better to save his energy for the actual questioning. Maitimo crawled to the chair, and pulled himself onto it. He winced as he sat down. His back and buttocks were still only partially healed from the last time he had been whipped, but the flinch was more so at the thought of his filthy skin touching the elegant upholstery. 

Mairon didn’t look up through the whole laborious process. He appeared to be filling in some sort of grid, carefully writing figures and occasionally tallying up the columns. Finally he looked up.

“So you are the High King of the Noldor?” He sounded bored.

“I was. I am not king of much here.” Maitimo met Mairon’s eyes, trying not to be the cringing thing he could feel himself becoming. 

“Hm, so I am to interrogate you. Are they still asking you about silima?”

“Among other things,” Maitimo said cautiously.

“I already know the size of your army, how they are armed, what they have gained, what they still lack, where you are camped, the messages that have been exchanged with the local Sindar, and who now calls himself the High King. I’m sure I know more than you at this point about the Noldor on these shores.” Mairon sighed heavily. “But I shall question you nonetheless. How did Fëanáro create the Silmarils?”

“I don’t know,” Maitimo said, reflexive terror closing around his throat and making his voice shake.

“Why did Fëanáro burn the ships?”

“To prevent anyone from fleeing, and from his half-brother from joining us.” He had agonized over letting that information slip, but it had spilled out some time ago. In the end he wasn’t sure how much it mattered. Morgoth already knew of the strife between Fëanáro and Nolofinwë; he had helped sow it. At least Maitimo had not spoken of the kinslaying.

“Anything else you wish to share?” Mairon absently flicked a contraption on his desk, setting off a tinkling cascade of chimes.

“No.”

“Well, that was a very productive conversation, a good use of time for us both.”

Maitimo felt a huff of air leave him, something like a laugh. “This is the best use of my time since I arrived.”

A corner of Mairon’s mouth rose. “I suppose it is.” He drummed his fingers against the desk. “Nelyafinwë, do you like games?”

“Yes,” said Maitimo hesitantly. 

“The only thing that’s enjoyed by folk here is base gambling. A good wager can be entertaining, but only for a moment.” Mairon carefully set the ledger to the side. “The numbers are as good as they are going to get until Langon sends his update.” Mairon stood and returned with two goblets. He handed one to Maitimo. Maitimo sniffed it suspiciously. 

“It’s water.”

After a cautious sip, Maitimo began to drink greedily, the cool, clean water soothing his parched throat and tasting sweeter than any nectar.

“If you throw up, I am expelling you immediately.” 

Maitimo reluctantly lowered the goblet, and saw a board with many glittering pieces had appeared on the desk. 

“So, you are the silver pieces, I am the gold,” Mairon began. Maitimo tried to focus on the rules, his mind still reeling from the unexpected, if temporary, relief from torment and his surprisingly charming host.

#Maedhros/Sauron #Mai squared #this was fun #thanks for the prompt! #my writing #ibrithir-was-here #askaipi

[sheerfreesia007]

Finding Love In Legacy OaIs pt. 12

Title: Finding Love In Legacy Oaks pt. 12

Fandom: Kingsman

Pairing: Agent Whiskey x Reader

Author: @sheerfreesia007​

Words: 8,768

Warnings: Fluff, mention of injury, mention of cheating, mention of mental & physical abuse

Permanent Tag List: @paintballkid711, @fioccodineveautunnale, @phoenixhalliwell, @linkpk88, @weirdowithnobeardo, @athalien

Author Notes: I’ve used the Old Farmer’s Almanac for the flower meanings since there are so many different cultures that have different meanings for the flowers. (I used a different meaning for Daisies though because I needed a get well soon flower) And I love Es calling Jack out on upping his flower game. “Tough nuggets” came from teaching myself and my husband not to curse in front of our son when he was younger, we came up with tough nuggets and the kid even started to say it which is super cute! We learn about the ex-husband, dun dun duuunnnn. He’s another piece of work just like Cynthia.

Gif Credit: Google

Stepping on the brake slowly Jack came to a stop at the guard shack as Jeremy stepped out of it early on Saturday morning with a slightly confused smile on his face. Jack lowered the volume on his radio and rolled down the driver’s side window so he would be able to talk to Jeremy as the man leaned against the doorframe of the shack.

“I thought you weren’t supposed to be home until tomorrow afternoon?” Jeremy asked curiously about the obvious change of plans. Jack nodded his head before looking over at him.

“Work wrapped up earlier and I wanted to surprise the girls. How’re they doing?” Jack replied with a question of his own. Jeremy smiled softly at Jack’s question before sighing softly, he crossed his arms over his chest and settled against the doorframe more securely.

“Well Es is still upset about Bunny breaking her ankle. Still feeling guilty that it’s her fault even though Bunny and I have told her that it’s not. Bunny’s been trying to keep her occupied and busy to keep her mind off of it. But Bunny’s drained, between the pain of her ankle and having to do things while on crutches it’s hard for her. Much harder than she was expecting I think. But you know Bunny she’s gonna put a brave face on and not show you how she’s really feeling.” Jeremy explained conversationally and Jack nodded along to his words.

“But Bunny’s big on checking in on everyone else and making sure that they’re all okay, who checks in on her?” Jack asked knowingly and Jeremy nodded his head in agreement.

“Well Penny Rogers checks in on her every once in a while and then I’ll call her at least once a week to catch up. But I don’t think Bunny has anyone who checks on her every day.” Jeremy said truthfully and Jack sat back in his seat for a moment silently contemplating that info.

“Her siblings don’t reach out to her? Or her parents?” he asked concerned and Jeremy shrugged his shoulders.

“Every once in a while but not all the time. Sometimes it’ll be months between her siblings calling her. And I think her parents call her about once a week. Her sister keeps up with her more because of her nephew but again I think it’s once a week. So she’s got people who check in but not every day.” Jeremy advised. Jack nodded his head at his words and sat there wondering if Bunny would think it weird if he began to check on her every morning or afternoon.

“Okay, well I know she’s probably gonna give me shit for it but I’ll help her out with anything that she needs done.” Jack said with a soft smirk and Jeremy scoffed before laughing knowingly.

“Oh yeah she’ll give you shit for it but I’m pretty sure you’re the right guy to put her in her place and let her know what’s what.” Jeremy said with an ecstatic glint in his eyes. Jack laughed loudly at Jeremy’s words and shook his head at the thought that he’d have to put Bunny in her place.

“Hey anyway, here I got this for you on the way here. In thanks for helping Bunny and Es out when that all went down.” Jack said as he turned to his passenger side seat and pulled out a plain bagel, some butter and cream cheese packets, as well as a large coffee and the sugar and milk containers. Handing it over to Jeremy through the window Jack smiled softly at the pleasantly shocked face of Jeremy.

“Oh wow! Thanks man, this is great.” Jeremy said in thanks as he took the food and drink from Jack.

“Yeah figured I’d pick ya up somethin’ since I stopped there for breakfast and just to say thanks and I appreciate you helping Es and Bunny.” Jack said with a shrug of his shoulders when Jeremy came back to lean against the doorframe with a soft smirk on his face.

“You care a lot about Bunny don’t you?” Jeremy asked knowingly and Jack instantly felt as if Jeremy was interrogating him. Jack looked over at Jeremy quickly who was still smirking at him. Feeling his anxiety rise slightly Jack tried to find a way to not divulge to Jeremy just how much he liked Bunny.

“Well yeah, I mean she’s been a huge help to me with Esme ever since we moved here. And she’s always so nice to everyone around here. How can I not like her?” Jack reasoned unassured as he watched Jeremy’s smirk widen on his face.

“Uh-huh, but that’s not what I’m talking about. And I think you know that.” Jeremy said cryptically and Jack knew that he had been caught out by the man standing before him. “You don’t have to on guard with me man. I’m loving that you two are feeling something out together. I think it’d be good for the two of you. I mean I don’t know your story but if you two wind up together it’d probably be great for Bunny.” Jeremy told Jack still sounding cryptic and Jack sat there wondering what he meant about it being good for Bunny to be with him. Jack also felt a seed of hope settle in his chest and he took in a deep breath feeling it start to pulse.

“I’m still trying to figure it out what’s going on between us.” Jack blurted out truthfully and looked over at Jeremy shocked. The man was nodding his head knowingly before he smiled softly down at the ground.

“There’s nothing wrong with that.” He admitted. “Plus I don’t think Bunny’s there quite yet either. You gotta give her a little bit of time to warm up to a romantic relationship. She’s been hurt really bad by her ex-husband, so she’s cautious and doesn’t trust easily when it comes to that type of relationship. So if you’re still figuring it out just know that so is she.” Jeremy advised softly and Jack got the feeling that Jeremy knew everything about Bunny’s past with her ex. He wondered silently why Jeremy knew everything and how the two had bonded over something like that to become such close friends.

“Thanks.” Jack said nodding his head as Jeremy cleared his throat softly and shuffled his feet underneath him.

“Just know that if you hurt her I’m coming after you and then I’d let Bunny adopt Esme once you’re taken care of.” Jeremy said nonchalantly as he shrugged his shoulders and stood to his full height. Jack burst out laughing at that and slid his car into drive.

“Well at least Esme would be well cared for that’s all I’d want.” Jack said jovially and Jeremy shook his head laughing at Jack. Jeremy then waved at him as he pressed the button to raise the gate at the entrance.

“Alright I’ll see you later. Tell Bunny I’ll call her before I leave work.” Jeremy said in farewell and Jack nodded as he slowly eased his car through the gate after waving at Jeremy.

*-*-*-*

Parking his car in the driveway to his house Jack stepped out of the car and stood next to it for a moment gazing around the quiet morning in the neighborhood. It was still too early for anyone to be up and about as the sun was just rising from the horizon. He smiled softly as he heard birds chirping before he saw they darting and dashing through the air. He relished in these quiet moments where he was able to reflect and just take in his surroundings as time slowly creeped by.

Shaking his head softly still smiling he moved to the passenger side of the car and opened the door so he could lean inside and pull out the bag of bagels and condiments, as well as the large bouquet of flowers he had ordered. Standing tall once more he nudged the car door shut with his hip before turning and walking across the street to Bunny’s house. Jack was reminded once again of the quiet morning as the only sound was the heel of his cowboy boots landing on the pavement of the street. It almost made him feel lonely as he listened to his footsteps, but then he heard the soft music playing as he neared Bunny’s house and he smiled as he saw the front windows were opened and he could hear Esme calling out to Bunny from somewhere inside the house.

Grinning widely he knocked on the front door as he came to stand before it. There was a loud call from inside and Jack heard running footsteps from the other side of the door. He chuckled softly when he saw the curtain on the side window shift and fall back across the window as a loud squeal was heard.

“Daddy!” Esme shouted loudly as she grinned up at him happily. Jack set the bag of bagels and the bouquet on the ground before kneeling down and opening his arms up to her. She quickly dashed forward and wrapped her small arms around his neck tightly as her small body collided with his. Jack wrapped his arms around her quickly and held her to him tightly.

“I missed you peanut.” He said fondly into her wild hair and she giggled softly.

“I missed you too. Love you lots like jelly tots.” She said softly and Jack felt his heart melt instantaneously as his arms tightened around her slightly more.

“Love you lots like jelly tots.” He whispered back to her before pressing a soft kiss to her temple. Esme took a step back and looked down at the flowers and bag of bagels before grinning up at him.

“Good thing you bought breakfast.” Esme said knowingly and Jack tilted his head to the side confused.

“Why?” he asked curiously and Esme hooked her thumb over her shoulder to the inside of the house.

“Bunny didn’t get a lot of sleep and she’s not used to her crutches yet.” Esme explained softly and Jack nodded his head in understanding. Just then there was the loud sound of crutches hitting the floor and a loud hiss of words that couldn’t be made out. Jack quickly grabbed the bagels and flowers before ushering Esme inside so he could see if Bunny was alright.

“Es, who was at the door?” came the called out question and Jack turned the corner to see Bunny leaning back against the kitchen island grimacing as she rested one of her crutches against the front of her body. Jack stood there in awe as he stared at an adorably bedraggled Bunny. She was dressed in an oversized long black sleep shirt that had the words ‘Amazing in bed, I could sleep for days’ on the front in white lettering. Her hair was piled up high on her head in a messy bun and she had a bunch of hair falling out of it around her face. Her right foot was in a large clunky white cast and the other was barefoot. Her left wrist was wrapped tightly in a bandage as she clenched and unclenched her fist. Jack’s eyes danced down her body and felt a warmth settle in his stomach as he imagined waking up to her like this every day. His eyes lingered on the lettering on her shirt as she finally looked up at him and he felt desire start to bloom inside him as he saw her eyes widen at seeing him standing in her kitchen doorway. “Jack!” she said shocked before he watched her cheeks flush with a pretty pink color as she tried to hurriedly move from her position over to him. Once more he dropped everything he was holding as he saw her try to twist and began to fall forward when her crutches escaped her hold.

Easily catching her around the waist Jack held her close to his body and gazed down at her trying to see if she had hurt herself with her movement. She grimaced softly with her eyes closed before opening them and looking up at him. He smiled softly at her and her cheeks seemed to flush once again.

“Second time you’d had to the catch me.” She said with embarrassment tinging her tone of voice as she grimaced softly up at him.

“I’ll always be here to catch you.” He promised softly and watched as her eyes sparkled with appreciation of his words. “Are you okay?” he asked as he began to straighten her posture against him. He bit his tongue harshly when he felt her soft body lean into him and he felt that she wasn’t wearing a bra under her shirt. Arousal spiked inside him and he felt the warmth from earlier begin to boil under his skin. His hands came to rest at the base of her lower back on her hip bones and the urge to drag her body into his was almost too great for his will power. But he managed to hold back on his desires as he watched her nod her head at his question.

“Yeah just a little clumsy with the crutches still.” She said a little dismissively.

“Well you did only get them yesterday Bunny.” Esme said self-assuredly and Jack was instantly reminded that it wasn’t just him and Bunny in the house. He turned his head to watch Esme set the bag of bagels and flowers on the kitchen island as she hopped up onto the stool at the island. Jack felt Bunny begin to pull away and he regretfully let her go as she took a step towards the kitchen island and grabbed her crutches again. “You still have to get used to them.” Esme said before she began pulling out bagels and the different cream cheese that Jack picked up.

“Yeah, I know. I’m just feeling sorry for myself.” Bunny said a little dejectedly and Esme looked at her with a sure confident look making Jack bite his tongue once more waiting for the gem that was going to pop out of his little girl’s mouth.

“Tough nuggets.” Esme scoffed and Bunny’s head whipped to her as she burst out with shocked laughter.

“Excuse me?” Bunny asked amused and Jack grinned as Esme squared her shoulders.

“Tough nuggets. You shouldn’t feel sorry for yourself.” Esme said assuredly and Bunny laughed happily at Esme’s words.

“Alright, alright.” Bunny said shaking her head as she held her hands up in faux surrender to Esme. “Jack these are beautiful.” Bunny said as she took hold of the bouquet and lifted it to her face to take a whiff of the pretty flowers.

“Yeah Daddy! They’re really big!” Esme said eyeing the flowers. “Bigger than the last ones.” Esme said as her eyes darted over to Jack who instantly felt like an ass for only buying grocery flowers the last time for Bunny.

Jack stood there silently watching as Bunny laughed amused as Esme called him out on his flower buying skills before she moved to the sink and awkwardly began to try and bend over to get a vase from under the sink. Jack quickly moved to grab one of the larger vases to hold the flowers. Bunny grimaced slightly and Jack knew she was feeling frustrated with needing his help so quickly. He nudged her hip with his and she looked up at him and he smirked down at her before speaking.

“Tough nuggets.” He said and her eyes widened slightly before she burst out into laughter.

“I’m gonna be hearing that an awful lot from you two aren’t I?” she asked amused and Jack grinned before nodding.

“Yep.” Esme said from behind them making Jack and Bunny burst out into laughter at her quick wit.

“Alright let me get the flowers and I’ll cut them.” Bunny said as she hobbled over to the island before leaning the crutches on the counter before moving back to the sink with the flowers in her hands. “They’re beautiful by the way. Thank you so much.” Bunny said as she set the bouquet on the counter and pulled out a pair of scissors from the drawer.

“I figured they’d brighten up your mood after breaking your ankle.” Jack said smiling at Bunny who nodded her head. “How are you holding up by the way?” he asked watching as she cut open the brown paper package and string tied around the flowers.

“Last night was rough. In a lot of pain. Had to sleep down here in the second guest bedroom last night. Wasn’t able to get up the stairs to the bedroom.” Bunny relayed to him and Jack nodded along to her explanation.

“Do you need me to move anything from upstairs down here for you? It’d probably be easier for you if you stayed down here until you got used to the cast more. Don’t want you to take a tumble down them stairs.” He said contemplatively as he looked over his shoulder at the stairs that were just outside the kitchen doorway.

“I’d have to check the bedroom to know what I’d need. I do have to go out shopping though. Get some baggy pants or shorts to be able to get them over my cast.” Bunny said as she pulled out two purple hydrangeas from the bouquet. Jack watched silently with baited breath as Bunny peered at the flowers in thought before snipping the end of it and handed it to him to place in the vase.

This past mission with Tequila had been an interesting one. They had an intel agent on the inside of a religious cult who was deep undercover and hadn’t been able to communicate with them in the traditional ways so they had to get creative. When Jack and Tequila had first visited the religious cult Jack had noticed all the large flower arrangements that filled the main building on the compound where the agent lived. He and Tequila had then put together a plan to communicate with the agent through flowers by slipping a flower of significance to reflect if it was safe to meet with them or not to relay the information they needed. Jack had done a lot of research on the language of flowers and their meanings. Which was why he had decided to order a special bouquet for Bunny.

As Jack placed the hydrangea in the vase he silently thought of what the flower meant, gratitude. He waited patiently as Bunny handed him the next bunch of flowers he had chosen. When she handed him a bunch of sunflowers he smiled down at the large flowers, adoration. Jack wondered silently if Bunny knew what each flower meant or if she just took the flowers at face value. The next bunch she passed over to him were some fern and basil leaves that he had asked the flower store clerk for specifically, fascination and good wishes were the respectful meanings of those two. Jack had to admit he had a lot of fun creating Bunny’s bouquet and felt like a secret that he had specifically created this bouquet for her, he was a little giddy that she might not know what he was saying with the flowers.

White daisies were the next flowers that she handed to him and he smiled down at the delicate looking flowers in his hand, get well soon. Jack looked over and saw that Bunny was looking down at the next bunch of flowers which were coral peonies. Jack sucked in a breath because this flower had numerous meanings to it but he was going for good fortune and compassion when he had chosen it. Bunny looked up at him with lightly pink dusted cheeks as she handed him the flowers, her reaction to the flowers making Jack wonder if she did know what the flowers symbolized. Jack’s eyes landed on the next two flowers and he felt his body tense with anticipation of Bunny noticing them. Two white gardenia flowers sat on the brown paper and as Bunny picked them up in her hands Jack avidly watched her reaction. She stood there staring down at the flowers as her cheeks heated up to a deep red color and her mouth parted softly. Her head snapped up to look at him and Jack felt like he had just been gut punched as her eyes were dilated and her breaths were coming out in soft pants. Secret love or you’re lovely was the symbolism for these flowers and while Jack was still figuring out how deep his feelings were for Bunny he had a feeling that it might easily morph into the first meaning.

“Jack.” She said softly and he smiled fondly at her waiting for her to say what she was thinking. “Do you know the language of flower?” she asked with her eyebrows slightly furrowed and he nodded his head grinning softly as her cheeks heated even more. “Oh.” She said in a soft shell shocked voice. Her eyes darted down to the flowers in her hands before looking up at him. “I-“ she began to say something and Jack rested his hands on top of hers.

“Right now I’m saying I think you’re absolutely lovely. And something is developing between us, but I’d like to take it slow if that’s alright with you. I’m still not sure what exactly I’m feeling and it’s been two years since Maria. I’d like to be close friends first before we explore this other side that I think is forming between us.” He said softly so that Esme didn’t overhear him. Bunny looked up at him with soft tender eyes and he could see the uncertainty swirling in her orbs but there was also longing at the edges of her eyes. Jack took in a relieved breath when he watched Bunny nod her head at his words.

“I’d love that.” She said softly and Jack felt like his heart just exploded in his chest with happiness. He nodded his head as he took the flowers from her hands and placed them in the middle of the bouquet. Bunny’s bright smile spread across her face and Jack watched as her eyes looked happily on the flower arrangement that he had created just for her.

*-*-*-*

“Alright so let’s talk about how we’re going to help you out with things you need done.” Jack said as he stood from the kitchen table and picked up the plates that they had used for breakfast.

“Jack you don’t have to do that.” Bunny protested as she began to ease herself out of her chair. Jack whirled around on his feet and pointed his finger at her.

“Sit. Down.” He commanded suddenly and Bunny stopped short in her ascent from her chair to stare at him with wide shocked eyes. She slowly lowered herself back into her seat and watched him silently in shock. “I got this. I think I can handle a few dishes.” He promised her.

“But Jack I’m not helpless.” Bunny protested as she crossed her arms over her chest.

“No you’re not but you’re injured and need to rest and heal.” Jack said firmly as he stared at her.

“But Jack, I can do that myself.” Bunny tried again to protest and Jack shook his head.

“Nope.” He responded. Bunny opened her mouth to retort once more and Jack shook his head quickly. “Tough nuggets.” He said before whirling on his heel and walking over to the sink. Esme’s happy giggles burst into the air and Bunny’s soft grumbling could be heard making Jack grin softly at the antics of them.

“So you’re not going to let me do much are you?” Bunny asked in a sour tone. Jack shook his head and chuckled lightly.

“Bunny, you need to heal and if you’re constantly on your feet aggravating the break it’s not going to heal quickly or effectively. You gotta let us help you as much as we can. Keep your ankle elevated and stay off your feet as much as possible.” Jack said adamantly. “I’ve broken bones before, recovery sucks but I’m gonna do my damndest to make sure that you heal as quickly as possible.” He leaned back against the sink and crossed his arms over his chest. Bunny was looking at him with soft eyes and Jack felt himself being pulled into her gaze from across the kitchen. “Besides, now Es and I can spoil you a little bit.” He said with a shrug of his shoulders. Bunny ducked her head quickly as Esme squealed in her chair with happiness. Jack smirked as he saw the soft blush on her cheeks at his words and Jack knew he won her over.

“Alright fine.” Bunny conceded and Jack beamed over at her as Esme clapped her hands happily.

“How often does Butter have to go out?” Jack asked kindly before turning back to the sink to wash the dishes quickly.

“Oh well, I normally take him around the block twice a day once in the morning and then once in the afternoon or evening. But he can go out in the backyard for now until I get into a boot.” Bunny said and Jack shook his head as he finished drying the dishes and stored them away in the cabinets. He turned and leaned back against the sink and sighed softly as he shook his head at Bunny.

“Will you let us help you? Please?” he asked softly as he looked up and over to her. “You’ve done so much for me and Es, it’s our turn to help you when you’re in need. Let us.” He implored her and she looked at him surprised. She sat there in her chair her eyes darting from him to an eager looking Esme for a few moments before nodding her head in compromise. “Thank you.” Jack said softly and Bunny pouted her lips slightly but nodded her head. Jack knew that she didn’t want to burden them and she was being stubborn but Jack was adamant about helping her and making sure that she was well taken care of. But while he was ready to fight her and glad that she was allowing them to help her, when she pouted her lips like that overtly all Jack wanted to do was walk over and kiss the pout off her mouth. Blinking his eyes rapidly he tried to erase the image from his mind of them kissing before he spoke again. “So Es and I will come over before we walk to the bus stop and we’ll take Butter with us. Same for in the afternoon.” Jack informed her and Bunny reluctantly nodded her head. Jack grinned and winked at her watching as she blushed and furrowed her eyebrows.

“Oh yes! I can totally walk Butter.” Esme said happily and Bunny chuckled softly.

“You’ll have to show your dad the doggie bags and everything.” Bunny said as she looked over to Esme who nodded eagerly. “Thanks Es.” She said softly before looking over at Jack who nodded his head. “Alright so that’s taken care of do you guys want to hang out? Or do you have things you have to get done?” she asks making Jack look at her with a disappointed look. “What?” she asks exasperatedly as she raises her hands in the air.

“We’re not done. But we do need to go food shopping. Are you up for a trip to the store or do you want to stay home?” Jack asked as he looked over at her. “Oh and we have to figure out what you need from your room upstairs moved down.” Jack suddenly clapped his hands together and rubbed them together eagerly. Bunny shook her head and Jack began to nod his head at her. “C’mon Es, head upstairs and get dressed while I help Bunny up the stairs. Pack up your stuff so that we can bring it back to the house before going out.” Jack instructed easily and Bunny looked at him offended as Esme quickly hopped off the kitchen chair and raced upstairs to her room.

Jack walked over to Bunny and set one his hands on the back of her chair, the other sat steadily on the kitchen table in front of her effectively caging her in her seat. He leaned forward and watched as Bunny took in a sharp breath as her eyes widened at his closeness.

“Look, I’m not trying to make you feel like you’re an invalid. But I don’t want you hurting yourself again because of your pride. You broke your ankle Bunny. That’s no joke and I really want you to heal. I want you in no pain. So please don’t think I’m just trying to take over here. I’m just trying to help you. I promise.” He said softly as he stared deeply into her eyes. He smiled softly as she silently nodded her head at him. He then stood to his full height and took a step back to grab her crutches for her. He stood a step away from her chair holding the crutches out for her as she stood from her chair. She took a hold of the crutches and began moving towards the stairs. When they had both reached the bottom of the stairs Bunny turned and looked up at him as she was hunched over her crutches.

“Let me try to do this. Just stay behind me in case I fall.” She said determinedly and Jack nodded his head in agreement.

“I’ll always be here to catch you.” He promised her and allowed her to do it her way.

*-*-*-*

Jack smiled as Esme chatted easily with Bunny as the two of them walked ahead down the aisle. He was stuck pushing the cart but he couldn’t complain as he was able to surreptitiously observe Esme and Bunny’s relationship right before his eyes.

Jack could feel his heart swelling in his chest as Bunny talked with Esme about everything the little girl brought up. And while Bunny was knowledgeable in a lot of things there were some topics that puzzled her. Like right now Esme was going off on a tangent about one of the shows that she watched and Jack had to bite his tongue as Bunny looked down at his little girl with a lost look on her face. He was shocked when he noticed that Bunny wouldn’t interrupt Esme in her ranting about the show and let her get it all out first. He chuckled softly when he heard Bunny begin to question Es on the show once she was done.

“So you mean her parents don’t even know that she’s a witch?” Bunny asked confused and Jack bit his bottom lip as he watched her eyebrows furrowed in confusion and disbelief.

“Yeah she’s been able to keep it a secret from them.” Esme explained, nodding her head. “She’s had some close calls where they’ve almost figured it out but not yet.”

“Oh okay, but her grandma knows?” Bunny asked, still perplexed and Jack was absolutely charmed as this woman before him took time out to understand more about his daughter’s favorite show. “Oh hold up, hey can you grab that box of crackers for me please?” She asked stopping next to the crackers and pointing them out to Esme, who eagerly grabbed the box and placed it in the shopping cart. “So how come the grandma never told the parents? Wouldn’t that be something she should tell the parents?” Bunny asked and Jack shook his head silently at the scene before him. He was relieved that he and Bunny were now on the same page for their relationship because now he was gifted with watching his two favorite girls discuss a tv show while the three of them shopped for groceries.

*-*-*-*

Jack finished putting the last box of pasta in the pantry and turned with a grin to Bunny who was leaning against the kitchen island with her crutches leant next to her hip on the island. She smiled softly at him as she shook her head and crossed her arms over her chest. He walked over to her and let his eyes dart over her face to look for any discomfort. Standing in front of her he watched as her eyes darted up to his quickly.

“Are you in any pain?” He asked softly and she grimaced slightly at the question.

“A little, I was thinking of taking one of the pain meds and then sitting out in the backyard with my ankle up.” She answered him truthfully. Jack nodded his head at her response as he heard Esme coming back into the house from the backyard.

“Do you want us to head home? Or are you up for some company for a little longer?” Jack asked as Bunny hooked her crutches under her armpits and moved to the sink and leaned up to grab her medicine and a glass.

“Oh I’d love your company for however long.” Bunny said easily and Jack nodded his head as he opened her fridge and pulled out the iced tea that they had bought at the store earlier.

“Okay we’ll stay for a little bit longer. Wanna order dinner and have it delivered?” He asked as Esme walked into the kitchen and hopped up onto the stool at the island.

“Ooooohhh! Can we order pizza?” Esme cheered and Jack laughed happily as he set the iced tea on the island before turning to Bunny who moved to the island and set the glass down on it.

“Good choice!” Bunny said happily as she opened a drawer and pulled out a local pizzeria menu. “Here, pick a pizza and I’ll call them.” Jack watched as Esme peered over the menu while he poured Bunny a glass of iced tea that she thanked him for. Jack watched as she popped her medicine into her mouth and took a swig of her drink swallowing down the pills. With a grimace she blew out a breath after swallowing the pills and Jack chuckled softly.

“Don’t like pills?” He asked understandingly and Bunny shook her head.

“I don’t like the aftertaste they leave.” She explains as she takes another sip of her drink. Jack nods his head and looks over to Esme who’s still pouring over the menu.

“So what are we gonna eat tonight peanut?” He asked fondly as she looked up at him with his question.

“I wanna get a taco pizza.” She said with a shrug of her shoulders. “It sounds cool.”

“Oh, that’s a good one. They also have a good margherita pizza. And their garlic knots and mozzarella sticks are really good.” Bunny said as she pulled her cellphone out of her back pocket and began dialing the pizzeria number.

“Hey Es, c’mon. Let’s go walk Butter while Bunny orders and then we’ll come hang out once we’re done.” Jack said as he ushered Esme to the front door.

“C’mon Butter! Let’s go for a walk!” Esme called happily as she quickly made her way off the stool and towards the front door. Jack laughed as he watched Butter leap out of his dog bed in the kitchen and ran as quickly as he could to the front door where Esme stood holding the leash. Jack looked back at Bunny and she smiled and waved at him before focusing back on the phone call.

When Jack reached the door he saw Esme with her jacket on and Butter with his leash on. Esme handed Jack the doggy bag holder that was in the shape of a red fire hydrant, Jack laughed amused as he looked down at it in his hand. Esme smiled and turned to open the front door.

“So do you know Butter’s normal night time walk routine?” Jack asked as he began walking down the steps with Esme.

“Yeah, they normally walk to the bus stop before mine and then back taking the long way around the block.” Esme instructed and Jack nodded his head as he fell into step with Esme.

“Sorry that we’ve been with Bunny all day and haven’t had much quiet time together. Bunny just needs a little bit of our help since she broke her ankle. So we might be spending a bit of time with her.” Jack said softly as he looked over at Esme. He watched proudly as his little girl looked up at him with a furrowed eyebrow.

“Daddy, I like Bunny. I like being with her. I’m not mad that we’re spending time with her. Besides, she gives us time to be together even when we’re with her.” Esme explained reminding Jack of when Bunny wandered off in the grocery store leaving Esme and Jack to themselves to talk and check in with each other.

“I know, I just don’t want you to think that I’m ignoring you or paying more attention to Bunny.” Jack said insistently and Esme shook her head.

“Daddy, I-“ Esme began to say and then shook her head silently before looking up at him with a smile on her face. “I don’t think that. I know you’re not ignoring me. And Bunny needs our help, she's hurt.” Esme reassured him softly with a shrug of her shoulders.

“Ok, as long as you know that peanut. So how was school while I was gone?” He asked softly as they continued to walk towards her bus stop.

“It’s okay. We’re starting to do some projects in Science and I’m gonna need some help with that soon.” She said and Jack nodded his head along with her words.

“Ok, that’s no problem. You let me know what you need and we’ll go pick it up. And I’ll help as much as I can.” Jack said easily. “Anything else happen while I was gone?” He asked softly trying to see if she wanted to talk about what had happened at the sleepover.

“Are you asking about the sleepover?” Esme asked suddenly after being quiet for a moment. Jack turned his head to look down at her shocked, he was surprised that she had picked up on his leading questions, but he shouldn't have been as surprised since she was his little girl.

“Only if you wanna talk about it.” Jack offered easily. He watched Esme shrug her shoulders before letting them slump forward.

“I called Bunny Mom.” Esme said softly. “I didn’t mean to and Bunny said she wasn’t mad about it at all. But Cynthia wasn’t very nice to me about it. Said that I shouldn’t be spending so much time with Bunny because then I’ll get confused.”

Jack felt his heart clench in his chest at how lost Esme sounded. He stopped walking as they came to the bus stop before Esme’s and he kneeled down to be at her eye level. He placed his hands on her shoulders gently and turned her to face him.

“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with calling Bunny Mom. I mean she’s been taking care of you while I’m away so I’m not surprised you did call her Mom. And I think that’s great that you’re getting so close to Bunny that you might see her that way. Don’t listen to Cynthia, I’ll talk to her and tell her to mind her own business. She has no right to say anything to you about that, okay?” Jack reassured Esme as he stared into her eyes softly. “I just want to make sure that you’re okay. I know we don’t talk about your Mom that much and we probably should talk about her more.” Jack said softly and Esme tapped his nose gently making him look up at her after his eyes had fallen to the ground.

“I miss Mommy. Every day I miss her and wish she was still here. But I have you Daddy and Bunny may not be Mommy but she’s a really cool babysitter and I like her being my babysitter.” Esme said softly as she smiled at him. Jack felt tears well in his eyes as Esme’s words and he nodded his head.

He knew that they should probably talk more about Esme calling Bunny Mom but he wasn’t sure of his own emotions and feelings in regards to that. On one hand it had only been two years ago that Maria was taken away from them and he wasn’t sure if he was truly ready to have another “mom” in his life yet. He was comfortable with flirting and figuring things out with Bunny right now but he wasn’t looking too far in the future just yet. But on the other hand, Esme was forming a bond with Bunny that seemed to be very deep, strong and meaningful. It was the first time since Maria’s funeral that Esme had become close to another woman that she hadn’t known before Maria’s passing.

It was a convoluted situation and Jack knew he was going to have to address it but wasn’t sure if he was ready to do that just yet. So while he was relieved that Esme was okay with her slip of tongue he would hold off on the more in depth conversation for another time when he knew for sure what he wanted with Bunny.

“She is a cool babysitter huh?” Jack asked softly and Esme grinned at him as she nodded her head eagerly.

*-*-*-*

The sun was slowly setting as Jack stepped out of the back door and moved down the back steps of the house to where Bunny was sitting in one of her outdoor chairs with her right ankle propped up on the ottoman. On the small table next to her chair sat a tray of three glasses and a pitcher of peach flavored iced tea. Esme was standing not far on the brick patio in front of her easel and paints while Butter lazed about in the grass in front of Esme.

“You gonna paint Butter for me?” Bunny asked Esme as she nestled back in her chair. Esme turned to Bunny grinning as she nodded her head. Bunny grinned as she nodded her head at Esme and rested her head back on the chair, closing her eyes slowly.

Jack felt the urge to sneak up on Bunny and press a soft kiss to her lips to surprise her, but then he suddenly felt insecure of his intentions. So he walked up behind Bunny letting his fingers trail along her right shoulder before moving to the chair on her left. He saw her warm smile as she turned her head to watch him take a seat next to her.

“This is nice.” Jack said softly as he sat back in the chair and settled himself. Bunny nodded her head as she grinned over at him. “So we talked about the whole sleepover incident.” Jack said softly as his eyes watched Esme begin painting Butter, she was far enough away that Jack felt comfortable bringing this up with Bunny.

“Does she still feel badly about it?” Bunny asked softly as her eyes landed on him and stayed there steadfastly.

“She doesn’t feel bad about calling you Mom. She feels bad about what Cynthia said to her.” Jack said with a hard edge to his voice at the end of his sentence. Bunny nodded her head in thought and Jack saw her left fist clenching tightly. Leaning over he placed a hand on Bunny’s fist and she slowly released it.

“Sorry, I just get so mad about what she had the nerve to say to Es. She had no right to make a comment and it had to be an ugly one at that!” Bunny ranted heatedly and Jack felt his heart swell once more as he saw how angry Bunny became on the behalf of his daughter. “I mean she’s already a mean spirited woman when she doesn’t get her way but to say something cruel to a child? That’s unnecessary and uncalled for.”

“I agree. I don’t like that she said something mean to Esme. Especially if it was a slip of the tongue.” Jack said as he nodded his head and watched as Bunny grew quiet and almost turned in on herself. “Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked concerned and Bunny shook her head at his question.

“It’s nothing.” She deflected and Jack grew curious of what was running through her mind but ultimately chose to table the questions for the time being.

“Say, you’re awfully good with kids. How come you don’t have any?” Jack asked curiously as he turned to see Esme giggling at Butter who began to wiggle in the grass on his back with his feet up in the air. He got lost in just watching his little girl that when he realized that he had asked a question he turned back to Bunny, surprised she hadn’t interrupted him. He saw her smiling sadly at Esme and Butter, her eyes somber as she gazed at the two of them acting silly. “Bunny?”

“Oh, uh, well, you see my ex-husband wasn’t the greatest guy to have kids with. For the six years that we were married he cheated for four of them.” Bunny said bitterly and Jack looked over at her surprised. He couldn’t believe someone would look at anyone else when they had Bunny right in front of them. “Yeah, we got married right out of college after being together for two years. We were young and dumb, thought we were in love. I mean I was, but for him it was more of a power trip. He liked that I didn’t ask questions when he said to do certain things, even though I knew that I didn’t want to do them. I always thought, I trusted and loved him why would he hurt me?” Bunny explained softly. “I slowly started coming out of the fog around the fourth year of marriage, but by then he had the manipulation so ingrained in me that I couldn’t quickly break free from it. It was a whole process of getting away from him, took two whole years to finally pull the trigger and send the divorce papers.”

Jack sat there in shock as he listened to Bunny’s retelling of her past. He sat there shocked to his core that this wonderful, confident woman next to him had been manipulated and abused by her ex-husband, someone who should have protected her from all others. But then as he thought further of Bunny’s mannerisms and character he understood the burst of confidence he would see from her when interacting with him. She was still so unsure of herself when it came to men, and he was instantly glad that he had asked her to go slow with him as they explored their relationship.

“It got really ugly towards the end.” Bunny said solemnly and Jack whipped his head to look at her. “He tired to convince me that it was all my friend’s Mercy’s fault for putting it in my head to get divorced. He lied about the numerous affairs he had and was still having. He kept telling me that I wouldn’t leave him, that I couldn’t leave him. I developed some serious panic attacks and anxiety attacks because of him, but thankfully they pretty much disappeared once I was away from him. But the worst was the night he was served the divorce papers, I had moved out that day while he was at work and the courier delivered the papers once he got home from work. He was livid, to the point that he found out where I was living and shoved himself into my apartment when I answered the door. Came in screaming and yelling about the papers, shoved me down onto the floor and the way I landed on my right wrist broke it in a few spots.” Bunny explained as she slowly and calmly took in a few deep breaths. Jack tapped his fingers along the back of her left hand that he was still holding in his hand from before, letting her know that she was alright and he was here for her.

Taking a deep breath in and slowly blowing it out she turned and looked over at him, nodding her head gratefully at him. Jack smiled softly and nodded his head at her as well. He didn’t know firsthand what she gone through but after all the missions that he had been on he had seen quite a few men and women who fell prey to their loved ones abusing them.

“Had to go through the whole divorce with a cast on my arm that he kept saying was for show. I managed to get a restraining order on him and still have it to this day because he’s tried to pop up a few times in my life since the divorce.” Bunny said solemnly and somber. Her head suddenly perked up when Esme giggled loudly as Butter began suddenly running around the backyard chasing the lightning bugs that had started appearing and lighting up. “I probably should have told you that before babysitting Es, but he hasn’t bothered me in almost a full year now.” Bunny said suddenly and quickly as she looked over at Jack worriedly.

Jack shook his head slowly as he gently cupped her hand in his, trying to reassure her. He gazed at her for a moment before clearing his voice.

“Bunny, relax. Your past is yours to divulge however you see fit. I know for a fact that you wouldn’t let anything happen to Esme if it was in your power to prevent it. I know you’re careful with her and hold her well being over your own. And I know you would tell me if something was happening that you couldn’t stop or protect Esme against.” Jack said confidently as Bunny nodded her head. “It’s alright Bunny. I’m just sad to hear that someone treated you that horribly. You shouldn’t have had to go through that. And I’m so sorry that you did go through that.” Jack said softly.

“It sucks that it happened, and I understand that it didn’t have anything to do with me that it was all him and his choices. But you gotta get through it and let me tell you therapy works wonders.” Bunny said before chuckling softly and Jack nodded his head at her words.

“Yeah, we’ve done some therapy after Maria passed to help Esme and I express ourselves properly to each other.” Jack said softly. “He really cheated on you?” He asked suddenly and Bunny chuckled softly as she nodded her head. Jack just shook his head in silence and Bunny chuckled again.

“Yeah, I know. I never understood the whole cheating thing, if you’re unhappy in a relationship just leave it.” Bunny said softly. “That’s why I don’t get along with Cynthia, she isn’t faithful to her husband and I don’t know if she ever has been. At least since I’ve known her she never has been.” Bunny said bewildered as she shook her head slightly.

“Don’t get me started on her. She’s already on my shit list for that and now for being mean to Es.” Jack said darkly and Bunny nodded her head. Jack tapped his fingers against the back of Bunny’s hand once more to gather her attention. When she looked over at him he smiled softly at her. “Thanks for sharing.” He said softly and watched delightedly as Bunny’s cheeks flushed deeply.

“Just answering the question.” She said softly and shrugged her shoulders at him. Jack shook his head at her deflection and gazed at her fully as he shifted in his seat.

“Not many people want to share that type of information about themselves.” Jack said knowingly and Bunny shrugged her shoulders again.

“Figured it’d be something to help get to know each other.” Bunny said as she turned and watched Esme dancing around the backyard catching lightning bugs. Jack watched Bunny a little longer in silence as Esme giggled while Butter barked happily in the early evening, he was surprised by her candor but he surmised that he shouldn’t be. There was still so much that he needed to learn about Bunny and so much he had to share with her. Settling back in his chair he began to look forward to learning more about her.

#my writing #kingsman the golden circle #FLILO #agent whiskey x ofc #agent whiskey

[doctorgerth]

My request is Part II of Make Me, please!!!! THANK YOU!!!

It’s FINALLY here! This was surely a beast to tackle and Hawkins is a bitch to write for, but I hope I wrote this to your liking. I can’t apologize enough for you having to wait so long, all I can hope is that it was worth the wait! Thanks for requesting a part 2. It was my first time continuing something I’ve already written and though I might have beaten my head against the wall a few times, I really did enjoy it. ☺️

description: The tension between Hawkins and a certain kunoichi breaks. They fuck. That’s the plot. (female reader)

warnings: 18+ content / spoilers (kinda?) / explicit sexual content / explicit language / switch!Hawkins / restraints / choking / glove kink (if you squint) / foreplay / unprotected sex / rough sex / possibly ooc Hawkins

Part One 

Make Me pt. II (Basil Hawkins)

(look at Eru’s amazing gif!!!!! Ahh, I love it so much!)

Word Count: 3.7k

“Tell me your plans, or else.”

Even amidst the suffocating suspense, she wouldn’t dare let him take control just yet. With a roll of her hips, she ground her sex against his, eliciting a delicious moan from deep within him. If she played her cards right, she’d have him writhing underneath her in no time, forgetting all about this petty interrogation and even his own name.

“Do your worst.”

   Hawkins didn’t need the cards to tell him that he was going to fuck her right there in the interrogation room.

   Truthfully, he had consulted the cards earlier that morning for his daily reading, and when The Lovers card revealed itself, he had wondered if maybe he had gotten rusty in his tarot reading since arriving at Wano. Hawkins had been far too occupied with headliner duties, after all. That paired with his naturally withdrawn nature, he avoided any kind of romantic interactions (or rather, all interactions that didn’t involve work) with any denizen of Wano. That certainly included the countless courtesans Orochi had insisted on offering to both Hawkins and Drake as new headliners. Knowing these things, he simply disregarded the card entirely.

   Perhaps taking up such offers from any of those courtesans would have actually proved beneficial in the long run. Because in this moment, even if the probability of (Name) escaping freely afterwards was unmistakably high, he was utterly bewitched by her. All that occupied Hawkins’ thoughts were the temptations of her clothed cunt rubbing lecherously against him. Never had he felt more pathetic, giving in to such trivial desires he had otherwise easily suppressed in the past. Yet, he didn’t dare fight it. He couldn’t. Not when it was her.

   “You’re so hard for me already, Basil.” She cooed in confidence, eyes closed blissfully as she focused on grinding against his growing bulge.

   “Don’t talk.” He hissed through gritted teeth as his fingers dug helplessly into the meat of her thighs, moving her manually. He leaned back against the chair, mind hazy with a ravenous desire he hadn’t felt in quite some time; if ever. Maybe a quick release would help get his head back on straight and he’d finally get some valuable information out of her. If he’d have any ounce of willpower after this exchange, that is.

   She hummed in delight and could feel her panties begin to dampen the more he controlled her movements with newfound desperation. His breathing became ragged as he basked in her intoxicating heat. Low groans escaped from the back of his throat into the open air as she met his movements with a teasingly slow roll of her hips, greedy for more of his erotic gasps.

   They continued like this for some time, exchanging breathy pants of pleasure as they moved in time, simply grinding their bodies against one another. The two were conscious of their delirious repressions. Stress, frustration, the looming danger that was polluting the Wano atmosphere; all of it could be felt in the way they moved against each other. Desperate for each other’s touch. Yearning for release.

   “Your subordinates could come in any minute-”

   His hand flew to the back of her neck, pulling her down until their foreheads collided with a soft thud, noses touching, “I said, don’t talk.” He growled as he drew her in, at last claiming the lips he had dreamed of all these years.

   Their lips moved together in haste, attracting each other like magnets. It didn’t take long before they had to pull away for air, only to return with increased fervor, the kiss intensifying with each passing second. His lips felt so soft, just like she had remembered. Soft and supple, with a hint of maple. An effect of his straw abilities, she had assumed. Either way, it was deliciously tantalizing and she knew she’d end the night drunk off his taste. A warm and inviting buzz was already numbing her to the core.

   His back found its way against the chair as she pushed against him, trapping him between the chair and herself. She pulled away, her lips red and puffy from the sweet abuse.

   (Name) smirked down at him, “I can’t exactly strip with my hands bound like this, ya know.”

   He inhaled deeply through his nose, and slowly exhaled through his mouth, as if attempting to regain his composure. She rather enjoyed, perhaps more than she’d care to admit, witnessing the enigmatic blonde in such a disheveled state. It was gratifying to know that she had such a titillating effect on him.

   “I suppose I could help you. Give me any trouble and you’ll be sure to face the consequences.”

   “Though I do like the sound of that... I’ll be a good girl, I swear.” She leaned down to his ear, “Unless you want me to be bad?”

   “As if I’d let you.” A sudden ripping sound brought her attention downwards and she gasped as she observed his straw powers tearing away at her clothes, discarding them haphazardly into piles on the floor. The feeling of the straw on her skin once again was strangely arousing, especially as it crept along her more private areas in teasing manners.

   He sighed in, what sounded to (Name) like, disappointment, thus bringing her attention back to him. Stiffening underneath her, his eyes flickered from her to the deep purple lingerie that she sported. He looked almost dejected, but she could never be sure with him.

   “Is this for someone else?”

   She stifled a laugh, amused by his chagrin, “Just laundry day. Don’t worry, it’s all for you to enjoy.”

   She noticed the tiniest hint of a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips and as she tried to savor it, just as she blinked, it quickly faded to his default bored, pouty lip. Hawkins seemed to be in deep thought as his hands reached up hesitantly to observe the fabric. It looked incredibly soft and intricate, he was actually impressed by the design, but more so overwhelmed by how stunning she looked in it. Hawkins was always an enthusiast of lingerie aesthetics, it truly felt as if fate was mocking him.

   “May I?”

   She yanked at his hands and settled them along her chest with urgency. He held back a contented sigh as he gently felt along the fabric, squeezing and grasping at her breasts, appreciating the look and feel of them in the seductive attire. Light mewls escaped her lips as his hands felt electrifying against her skin. Such simple touches left her frenzied with desire, and she failed to recall a time she was ever left so sensitive to anyone’s touch.

   The bra was low cut, just barely covering her pert nipples that were already peeking above the lace, begging to be released of their confines. He pulled the fabric down to just below her breasts, letting them spill out. He took his gloved hand to her nipple, intrigued to observe her reactions. Two fingers pinched at the hardened bud, rolling it between his gloved fingertips. She inhaled sharply, head lolling backwards as she encouraged him on. His hold on her nipple tightened and he pinched harder, twisting and tweaking at it with ardor.

   Captivated by the smooth skin of her stretched neck, Hawkins leaned forward to trail sharp kisses along it, undoubtedly leaving bruises in their wake. He trailed down her throat, clavicle, and finally made home at her breast as he latched on, taking the bud softly between his teeth. A loud moan escaped her now and he eyed up at her, observing how her mouth hung open and she continued to lean backwards, a silent request for him to continue his ministrations. His free hand flew to her back, supporting her and holding her in place as she opened her chest up to him.

   “Basil…” She whispered pleasurably into the air.

   He hummed in response, enamored with the way his name dripped off her lips like nectar. Hawkins wanted to keep her like this forever; her body fitting wonderfully in his arms, her skin littered in goosebumps, her siren call of his name. He took his time, making sure to capture each look she offered, each sound she made in order to store these memories into the depths of his mind.

   “Please, more.” She cried out, lifting her head up and staring at him below her. With long lashes peeking from behind blonde curtains, he looked absolutely stunning as he held her, both in his arms and between his teeth. Her cunt fluttered at the sight.

   He studied her face, the way her eyes stared down at him with pure lust. Giving her breast one last squeeze, he trailed his gloved hand down the lacey fabric, reaching behind and curving along the swell of her ass until his fingers reached her dripping core. He rubbed at her eagerly, trailing and prodding two fingers along the damp cloth. Her hips bucked, another silent plea for more. Easily sliding her panties to the side, he traced around her warm entrance before slipping a slender digit inside, taking his time in entering her knuckle-deep.

   “Mm!” She whined as her body jolted at his entry. His long finger explored her cavern as it slipped between her walls, curling ever so slightly with its exit.

   “So tight…” He whispered dreamily to himself against her skin. Resting his forehead against her chest, he slid in and out of her at an agonizing pace, simply enjoying the way she squeezed around his finger with each entry.

   “I’m tired of you hiding from me, Basil.” Her voice grew shaky as he did not hesitate to add another digit inside, “It’s no fun being naked alone.”

   It was a bit tasking as her hands were still bound, but she managed to rip his shirt in similar fashion to his ripping of hers earlier. The tattered shirt hung loosely on him, revealing smooth, pale skin that she was more than excited to get her claws on. He looked up at her, a hint of anger in those crimson eyes that only made her clamp around those fingers in wanton.

   Reaching down to his pants now, she struggled with removing the sash until Hawkins grabbed her hands roughly, “Stand up.” 

   She was surprisingly quick to comply as she rose to her feet, watching him remove his shirt swiftly, and taking mental snapshots of the dents and divots of his beautifully sculpted torso. His skin looked like marble. Hawkins was smooth and lean, yet there was still an undeniable strength evident in the curves of his muscles. He could have easily passed as a statue before her, and she marveled at him as such.

   “Turn around.” This time, she was a bit hesitant to follow orders as she wanted to spectate his removing of his pants, but she knew it’d be best to listen to him if she wanted to get her way.

   The sound of various clothing falling to the floor made her ears perk up and it took everything within her not to turn around to catch a peek. She remained obedient, however, waiting for his next orders. When the binds around her wrists disappeared, her interest piqued.

   “Turn around and remove the rest. Slowly.”

   As she obeyed, a warm heat danced in her body as she admired how nearly god-like he looked sitting in the chair, stark naked. She licked her lips at his hardened cock making itself known between his thighs. He was thicker than she’d expect for such a lean man, and the length was definitely something to boast about. Not that a man like Hawkins ever would, which, in turn, only made him all the more desirable. As if reading her thoughts, he smirked, “Don’t make me wait any longer.”

   Gathering herself, she did as he commanded and made a point to take her time in stripping for him. Unclasping the bra in the back, she allowed the straps to fall down her shoulders before swiftly discarding it to the floor. It was hard to not be distracted by the way he touched himself, intently watching her every move and giving his dick a few slow pumps. Nevertheless, her fingers hooked underneath the band of her panties and she maintained eye contact as she pulled them agonizingly slow down her thighs, then kicked them off with her feet.

   He was amused at her brazen nature. How she never shied away from him, especially now as she stood entirely bare in front of him. Instead, she allowed him to ogle her body, towering confidently as his eyes meticulously traced her every curve. Hawkins had half a mind to continue the show, observe her as he ordered her to touch herself. Though at this point, he was far too eager to do it himself.

   “Sit.”

   “My, you move fast, Basil. I don’t think I’m ready.” She had hoped he didn’t hear the nervous quake in her voice.

   “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you are well prepared.” As she approached, he swiftly flipped her around and settled her bare ass in his lap, just in front of his twitching cock. She could feel it throbbing against her backside and her entire body burned red hot in consequence.

   Gently, he grabbed her arms to lock them behind his head. He nuzzled his face into her neck, taking in her sweet scent and placing a tender kiss along a mark that had just begun to bloom from his ministrations earlier, “You feel amazing. I think I’ll keep you just like this.”

   He promptly used his powers to bound her wrists once more, locking her arms in place. (Name) gasped as the stretch was a bit uncomfortable, but she came to enjoy the warm fire that burned in her belly. He then hooked her legs over his knees, driving them outwards in order to spread her open completely. He took advantage of his abilities yet again in order to secure her ankles around his calves, ultimately granting him easy access to explore every inch of her body. His gloved fingers immediately traveled south to toy with her sensitive button, while his right hand crept up to fondle her breasts.

   High-pitched whines escaped her as she struggled against the restraints. With her hands bound behind her and Hawkins keeping her legs spread widely apart, she felt utterly vulnerable to his affections and on the verge of overstimulation. She didn’t, couldn’t keep back her cries of his name while he rubbed vigorous circles onto her clit. Her pussy throbbed, clamping down onto nothing over and over as his hand crept further up to caress her throat, squeezing just tight enough to strangle her cries yet grant her enough air to breathe.

   His damp forehead fell against her cheek and she shivered as she felt his incredibly warm breath on her skin. He plunged two fingers inside her, while using his thumb to keep special attention on her clit, “Fuck! Basil, I-I’m gonna-”  

   He squeezed tighter around her throat, restricting her airflow for only a second or two, all the while increasing the intensity of her impending orgasm, “Let go.”

   As if releasing her from a spell, she did exactly that. Coming undone on his fingers with what would have been a loud cry if he hadn’t held such a firm grip. As he loosened his hold, she focused on her breathing, whining as his fingers exited from her abused and soaked cunt. He freed her from her restraints for the second time, but she hardly had the strength to move as she fell slack against his body, still working on catching her breath.

   He couldn’t help but chuckle, “Don’t tell me you’ve given up? I’m hardly done with you.”

   After a moment, she smirked and stretched her body, turning to face him, “I say it’s time to get you prepared.”

   He peered up at her, intrigued by her statement. She licked her lips, wasting no time in taking his dick in her hands to give it a few encouraging pumps. He hissed loudly at the contact, an electric wave of pleasure shocking his entire body. She dropped to her knees, leaning down to take his cock into her mouth.

   “You don’t have to-” He choked on his words as she abruptly took him inside her mouth, enthusiastically coating his dick with her saliva. She took him in as much as possible and he gripped at her hair as he focused on not coming on the spot. Damn, how long had it been since his last release?

   She could probably tell he was close already since she only sucked him off for a few seconds more. As she arose, she made quick movements to settle herself on top of him, grabbing at his soaked cock to place it at her entrance. His gaze followed her, challenging her. It was far too late to turn back, they both were well aware. There was a brief moment of hesitancy, but as his cock twitched shamelessly in her hand, they knew they were far from throwing in the towel.

   (Name) slid down onto his member, the both of them moaning out in unified bliss at the feeling of at last being connected. They remained still as they gathered their breaths, taking a moment to adjust, and reveled in the intimate feeling of each other. She was inconceivably warm and tight. Hawkins had to mentally remind himself to breathe.

   As she regained her composure, she began a steady rhythm of bouncing in his lap, eliciting the most delicious moans she’d heard from him yet. His eyes closed tight in intense pleasure and she was confident she now had him fully under her control.

   “Still worried about my, mmm, affiliation with the Straw Hats?” She panted with a smirk, “Who knew you had a thing for sleeping with the enemy~”

   He scoffed breathlessly, securing his strong arms around her to pull her in close. (Name) couldn’t help but gasp as his soft lips ghosted over her own, seeking her out in the midst of their tangled passions. He traveled along her skin with gentle strokes of his lips and tongue, “Only you.”

   A violent shiver coursed through her as those two words echoed loudly in her brain. Had she heard him right? Just what did that mean? Her mind was now a dizzying storm of questions. Her movements had slacked in consequence, and as she realized, she forced him back against the chair in order to pick up the pace.

   Slender fingers wrapped around his throat and squeezed gently. She shivered once more as his ruby eyes offered her sweet submission and his lips curved upward into a teasing grin, “Tighter.”

   She bit her lip to suppress her whimper, all the while she gripped his throat tighter as per his request until his eyes fluttered close; a look of utmost bliss painted along his face. (Name) rode him with intensity, her lips spilling out shameless praises and calls of his name as she angled herself in order for him to hit all the right spots. Her grip remained firm, and the vibrations of his strangled moans drove her closer to the precipice.

   His grip around her suddenly tightened and his breathing became staccato, a sure sign that he was close as well. Her legs were aching, and just as they were about to give in, Hawkins adjusted his hips so he could thrust up and into her from below. The pair moaned loudly, nearly in sync as he fucked her relentlessly. She was first to fall over the edge, Hawkins made sure of that. As her tight cunt squeezed around his cock, he followed suit merely seconds afterward, pulling out to paint her abdomen white.

   (Name) fell against his chest in utter exhaustion and Hawkins held her against him. Her fingers mindlessly threaded through his hair as the pair basked in the afterglow. His thumb brushed over her lip, pulling her up to him for one last searing kiss. She smiled against his lips, savoring one last drop of him for the night. She was inebriated beyond comprehension; a little unsure if she could walk home properly. His demeanor returned to neutrality and looking at him, it was almost hard to believe she had him a moaning mess just moments before.

   “Am I free to go, Mr. Headliner?”

   He sighed, deep in concentration. Keeping her still in his lap, he reached over to gather his loose articles, or rather, what was left of them. Not much remained of her worn clothing and though his own left little to be desired, it’d be enough to cover her until she could retrieve new clothes.

   “That depends. Do you plan to return these most treasured clothes of mine? I could have you thrown in jail for collusion and thievery.” His eyes gleamed with mischief as he cleaned her off and helped her get dressed, trying his absolute hardest not to ravish her all over again from the alluring sight of her draped in his clothing. She’d surely be the death of him.

   (Name) scoffed with an amused smile, “Think you could possibly capture me again, Basil?”

   He guided her towards the exit, “I believe the probability that I’d let you escape me twice is lower than you think.”

She leaned in, tracing along the prominent red lines she had etched onto his chest. In a low, sultry voice, she whispered, “And what’s the probability that you’ll interrogate me again?”

Hawkins went ramrod stiff. His eyes were easily drawn to her lips and any second longer in that heated tension, he would have taken her right there, all over again. Thankfully, her sweet laughter suppressed the carnal desire that was threatening to consume him once more. She was somehow life and death, simultaneously.

   “Well, let’s leave all the probabilities for your cards to decide. You might like what they have to show you.” She winked before swiftly escaping through the window.

   After her departure, Hawkins closed the window quickly, placing his forehead against the cool glass. He stood like that for some time, replaying every detail of their session over and over until he became overwhelmed. How Hawkins, a dignified man dedicated to his duties, could let such a paramount criminal escape so easily was baffling. Even still, despite all consequences of his careless actions, all he could think about was seeing her again. She lingered on his skin. The touch, smell, and taste of her would not be so easily washed away. Not that he wished her to be.

   He retrieved his discarded cloak to wrap around his bare body, and as he opened the door to some rather bashful subordinates who could hardly look him in the eye, he paid no mind, barking out orders to cut through the awkward tension.

   “Fetch me some new clothes and my deck of cards. I wish to be alone for the rest of the evening.”

#doctorgerth #one piece #one piece scenario #op scenario #scenario #ns.fw #sinful #slight spoilers #basil hawkins #hawkins #female crush #make me part two #takethethirdoption

[imaginaryari]

Welcome to the Show

Part One

The prisoner looks up as her least favorite cop comes into the interrogation room. Officer Warren has awards for rounding up the enhanced, people like Silver. He walks and talks like a man the people respect and fear. Talks to the enhanced like they’re close on first name bases and revels in the fact that he put them in their cells. What she would give to lay one finger on him. That’s all she needs. Unfortunately, her hands are gloved and bound because officer Warren also knows that. 

“To what do I owe the pleasure officer.” She asks.

“How would you like to get out here?”

It’s a trap. Silver knows this. The enhanced don’t get second chances especially not from officer Warren. 

 “Wasn’t I supposed to rot in here? Just as you said?” Silver asks.

Officer Warren gives her a sick grin. “I thought you would be interested in parole but if you aren’t...there’s plenty of you in here. “

The promise of seeing the outside world again would sway anyone.

“How can I trust you?”

Officer Warren beckons one of the guards. “Remove her cuffs.”

“Sir?”

“Now, please.” Warren orders.

Silver immediately rubs her wrists when the cuffs click open. The relief is almost overwhelming. She quickly reminds herself not to do anything stupid, no matter how satisfying it would be to knock Warren’s lights out.

-

“There’s a group of enhanced kids going around and robbing people. Messing with their heads. You’re fond of doing that so I thought this would be the perfect way to end your sentence.” Warren had said as he escorted her out.

Silver squints. Nothing about that story adds up. Robbing civilians while common isn’t a team effort especially if you can mess with minds and memory. A group would actually draw more attention and a tight knit one wouldn’t take the risk of losing a member to officials. 

Unless your Silver’s ex. Hm. Things are starting to make sense. 

“You’ve tried to catch them before.” Silver states. 

Warren doesn’t even look ashamed admitting his failure. “Physical powers are one thing. Mental ones are harder. But from my experience you can catch ‘em with a little trust.” He begins to walk away, leaving Silver at the gates. “You have three weeks.”

—

It’s no fancy hotel, barely a motel, but it’s a place and it’s furnished. Officer Warren had said it was hers for as long as it took her to finish her task. Silver won’t complain, before she was arrested, she was constantly couch surfing. Never out staying her welcome and never spending too long on the streets. She had made friends this way but contacting them was out of the question. Getting caught means getting blacklisted. A means of protecting themselves. Well, Silver had been thrown under the bus. Semantics. She won’t see them again and hopefully they’re doing okay. 

She shakes her head, never mind that. She has a job to do and extraordinarily little to go on. 

The neighborhood is different. She didn’t expect it to be quite the same after lock-up but the changes are more than jarring. New buildings going up, less of the spots her old friends used to hang. Silver is so sure the neighborhood has been purged of the enhanced until she decides to hit up one of the cafés. She stares at it; upset she can’t remember what it used to be and then enters reading the weirdly named drinks on the menu.

“Are you new around here?” another patron asks.

“Not exactly,” Silver says with a shrug, eyeing the stranger. He’s handsome even if he looks like he should have taken a sip of his drink before speaking. The bags under his eyes scream exhaustion but he still sounds awake. And happy about it. “It’s just a while since I’ve been round here.”

“Ah, try the mint hot chocolate. It’s a crowd favorite.”

“Is that what you’re having?”

He chuckles. “No…this is way too caffeinated for the masses.”

“Is the inevitable crash worth it?” She asks.

“Always.” He says as Silver is called next to order. “See you around.” The stranger says exiting. She thinks about the encounter for hours afterwards. The enhanced were still around even if they were muted.

—

She finds what she’s looking for the next day, right before the sun sets. It’s a large tent set up in a nearby park. Big enough to draw attention but lacking the actual necessities to pass as a real circus. No animal trailers, no confection stands. To anyone paying attention there’s no possible way it could have been set up so quickly. Definitely the work of the enhanced. 

Civilians flock to the tent with the promise of entertainment. Silver by-passes the line and taps a potential viewer on their shoulder. “You don’t really want to see this show, right? I can take that ticket off you.” The man blinks and then hands over his ticket. Silver quickly takes it and makes her way to her seat.

-

The spotlight lowers, illuminating what has to be the ringleader. He’s barely dressed for the occasion. Top hat donned but instead of a blaring red jacket, a black T-shirt with a tuxedo print and black jeans contrasting nicely with white sneakers. 

“Hello everyone. Welcome to your wildest dreams. I’ll be your guide. Whenever you need me you can shout More!” Silver snorts at the corny introduction but still applauds with the crowd. It takes a moment but she recognizes him. The man from the café with the over caffeinated drink. Interesting. So far he’s just the host, maybe the leader of this whole operation, but Silver can’t place an ability just yet.

“Please give a round of applause to our first act, Mirage, master of illusion.”

Silver is willing to bet he’s the one responsible for the tent. His set isn’t too extravagant; he just has smoke and card tricks. It’s what he does with them that counts. Shifting the smoke to look like a bird that soars over the crowd. It lands ever so gently on the empty seat in front of one of the viewers. The spotlight shifts to them, a young boy, and he offers a nervous smile, not prepared for the attention. The guest looks to Mirage who gives a cocky smile. “Blow it away.” He instructs through his mic. With a shrug he does. The smoke dissipates to reveal a real bird. A stark white dove. The young boy reaches for it face lit up in wonder, but it takes off landing right on Mirages shoulder. He pets it to prove its real and the dove seems to love it. However, it then dissipates into smoke after Mirage blows on it. That confirms it for Silver, the dude simply makes illusions.

“I need a volunteer for my next trick.” Mirage says.

He and More look around at the audience and More locks eyes with Silver. There’s a connection, a shock of understanding, and something else she can’t quite place before he says, “You, cutie with the hood. Would you like to help Mirage?”

Silver nods unable to break eye contact.

“Don’t be nervous, it’s just a simple card trick.” Mirage says, a deck of cards pulled from his pockets. Silver keeps her head down and her hood on as she walks into the ring. She wasn’t supposed to draw attention. More finally backs away giving Mirage the stage.

It is a simple card trick, with a lot of flourish. Silver selects a card, memorizes it, puts it back in the deck. Mirage is skilled making the cards seem to dance, shuffling and tossing them even pulling some from behind Silver. Sleight of hand can be learned, however,

“Is this your card?”

“It sure looks like it!” Silver says, and the audience applauds. Her choice in words don’t go unnoticed by Mirage. He smiles, like he just learned a juicy secret and gestures for Silver to return to her seat.

More passes her on his way back to the stage and gives her a similar smile to Mirage’s. She can’t help but feel she shouldn’t have done that.

“Our next act goes by Charlie. He doesn’t say much but he’s loads of fun!”

Silver immediately understands how the next act earned his name. Charlie dances out, encompassing Chaplin’s energy. He dons a similar top hat to More, and shirt except his is white instead. More comments on this with a laugh. “Clearly one of us has to change!” As corny as Silver finds More, she can’t say she’s not amused. Charlie looks More up and down, and then gets into a stance. He’s posed like a batter on home base and leans back and forth on his toes. He swings and More ducks, his top hat flying across the ring as if a real bat had hit it. The trick ears them impressed gasps and amused giggles from the audience. From Silver it earns a disbelieving stare. She’s never seen an enhanced like Charlie yet.

Charlie continues, his set like any traditional mime. Tripping over objects that aren’t there, pushing invisible walls, overexaggerating his facial expressions. Except Silver thinks, knows, he isn’t. There is a wall the audience can’t see. Silver can’t prove it, and wouldn’t even know where to begin explaining Charlie to officer Warren.

“Give it up for Charlie everyone!” More says shaking Silver from her thoughts. Charlie leaves the stage with the same comedic swagger and a wave.

“Now our next act is unfortunately our last. But we always go out with a bang! Please welcome to the ring, Star!”

With the snap of More’s fingers the lights go out. Another snap and they’re back, along with a woman sitting on a trapeze. She’s beyond beautiful, it could be the lighting, or the slight shimmer she has, but she’s captivating all the same. Her hair is pulled into two puffs and her smile dazzles the audience. Silver notes that there is no apparent netting beneath her, that should be concerning.

The music starts, a haunting melody punctuated by a bass that Silver feels in her chest. Star is flying above the audience on her trapeze. She hangs by her legs and lets her arms hang. If Silver focuses, she can see what looks like dust, her charisma spills off of her, entrancing the audience. She makes another mental note, three out of four isn’t bad. Maybe she wrong about him being enhanced. He could just be the fall guy if this all goes to shit. Authorities like Warren wouldn’t keep a powerless civilian. It’s smart. The doubt lingers. She knows what she felt.

Silver almost misses the end. Stars trapeze returns to the ring and she waves before letting go and falling to the ground. The audience gasps bracing for an impact that never comes. Star vanishes in a puff of smoke that settles all over the ring. The applause is stuttered out, the crowd is impressed and worried.

When the smoke clears the applause picks back up as all the performers are safe, taking their bows.

“Thank you all for coming!” More says. The lights go out. When they come back on the group is gone. Well, that’s one way to end things.

-

“Like the show?” A voice comes up from behind Silver. She’s just as dazzling up close and silver can see how she captivates the audience. The charisma wisps around her like smoke. 

“Sure did. Wasn’t expecting to be part of it though.”

“Yeah, More can be a bit impulsive,” Star says apologetically. She steps closer to whisper. “But his guess was right! You are like us.” 

“All of you? Special?”

“Yup!”

“What gave me away?”

“You didn’t immediately fall for my charm.”

“...really?”

“That and More caught you using your gift to get a ticket.”

“Also caught her struggling to order at the café,” More says rounding on them. “We should stop meeting like this.”

#mine #short story #circus story #writing #a story in 3 parts #its rough idc

[jesuiscalmedammit]

Mistakes Were Made – (2) The Truth || [Russell Adler x reader/fem!Bell]

note: part 1. the first half takes place before the end game. 

“Hey, you wanna talk about what happened?”

You looked up only to find Alex sitting next to you with a surprisingly genuine smile. But what could you tell him? Even you didn’t know how to feel about this whole mess you were in. You had told Russell the truth back in the safehouse and you were ready to help but… what would happen after that? Was there a chance you could ever have a normal life? It was confusing. Also, it’s not like he would understand what you went through.

Shaking your head, you eventually let out a sigh. “No, not really,” you told him.

“I know what being brainwashed and used like this feels like.” How the hell did he know you were just thinking about that? But you didn’t really get it. How would he know? “The Russians did the same thing to me a long time ago,” he answered the question you never asked.

This was new. And the more you thought about it, the less you understood why he was still willing to do this job after going through something like this. “Did Russell tell you that there had been no need for them to do this to me? I was already–No, I was always on your side.” He raised an eyebrow and slightly tilted his head to the side as he tried to figure out what that meant. “I was always working for the CIA. Things just… didn’t end well for me. It’s a long story.”

“We have time. I’m listening.”

You looked around to see if anyone else from the group was listening, but you were alone. Woods was the only one who glanced in your way every now and then, probably just to check on Alex, but apart from that, no one really cared about you. “All right, fine. I was born in Eastern Europe, that’s true, but my parents came to the United States as political refugees when I was around two so I grew up there. When I was in college my parents died in a car accident caused by some idiot who sat behind the wheel while being so drunk he could barely walk.

A few days later Timothy Clarkson from the CIA contacted me and explained the drunk guy was actually working for the KGB and killed my parents for the very reason they had fled their home country back in the day. He believed they might try to kill or recruit me after what happened and if it was the latter, they would blame the Americans and their lifestyle for my parents’ death to convince me to join them. Clarkson offered a chance to get revenge by becoming a double agent.

He and Henry Keen were the only ones who knew about this deal, about me, and there was no physical evidence either. After a while, I ended up working with Perseus and everything went well until Adler and his team captured me. Little did I know that not long before this Clarkson had been murdered on Perseus’ orders and Keen was left in a coma after a failed assassination. Long story short, there was no living or at least a conscious person who knew about my story.

When Adler interrogated me, I immediately told him I’m only willing to talk to Clarkson or Keen. Clarkson had given me a very clear order at the beginning and that was never to tell anyone who I was or what I know except them. He didn’t trust anyone, not even inside the CIA. This is why when Adler told me what happened to them, I assumed he was lying to make me talk so I kept everything to myself.

I didn’t think they would end up brainwashing me,” you noted with a sad smile. “And I sure as hell didn’t expect Russell to emotionally manipulate me like this only to make me behave.”

“Wait, don’t shoot! Hudson got a call and they verified her story!”

You wanted to lower your gun and let out a relieved sigh upon hearing Alex’s words, but you also knew now that blindly trusting Russell was not an option. He would surely pull the trigger the moment you paid less than enough attention to the situation. There was no way you would risk dying now that you got so close to being free again. This double life you’d been living had already taken away way too much from you.

Maybe you remembered this deep down even while you were brainwashed and controlled, this is why you were so desperate to have something remotely normal in your life. Normal… like… being in a relationship. You craved the feeling of being loved and protected and for your bad luck, Russell was there to use this against you. How the hell could you fall for him?

“So she was telling the truth?” Russell asked as he finally lowered his gun.

Yes, dipshit! God, you were, without doubt, spending way too much time in Wood’s company. Good thing you didn’t say it out loud otherwise you’d never hear the end of it.

Alex nodded. “Yeah,” he said as he walked over to you and put his hand on your gun. “Come on, it’s time to go home.” He even flashed a cautious yet reassuring smile at you as he took the weapon from your hand and put it away safely.

Alex had told you he was brainwashed by the Russians before and this was enough to make you trust him. He knew what you went through and so he was probably the only person who understood how you felt now. You needed this, you needed someone who could help you get over this nightmare.

“Bell, wait!”

“Adler, I don’t think this is the right time for that,” Alex stopped him before you could react. “Believe me.”

But he didn’t seem to give up because he once again opened his mouth. This time you didn’t wait for Alex, you handled it yourself. “There’s nothing to talk about, you almost killed me. I know this was a fucked-up situation but at least Hudson did his fucking job to try and verify my story.”

“Well, to be honest, I was the one who tracked down Keen,” Alex admitted as he scratched the back of his neck. “But sure, let Hudson take all the credit.”

Both you and Russell gave him a disapproving look. This wasn’t the right time to make such jokes. Even if he was only trying to elevate the mood, this wasn’t the right way to do it. Of course, it didn’t mean you weren’t grateful because you truly felt saved by him. Still…

“Can we just go?” you asked in the end.

“Sure, come with me,” he said as he put a hand on your shoulder.

You didn’t have to look in his way to know Adler wasn’t happy to watch you leave. But what was he expecting after this madness? Yes, at the end of the day it really was a series of unfortunate events that led to this, but he could’ve tried a bit harder to make sure you were lying before pointing a gun at you.

note: this is a russell/reader fic, but i’m still thinking about alex and bell bonding over the fact they were both brainwashed before and.. wel... one more reason for russell to be mad. also, thanks for all the positive feedbacks!!!!

taglist: @deviljoonie​ @ktdragonborn​

#russell adler #russell adler x reader #black ops cold war #russell adler fanfiction #russell adler x bell #russell adler x fem!bell #black ops cold war fanfiction #call of duty #call of duty fanfiction #fic: Mistakes Were Made

[writingtoforgetreality]

I Could Never Give You Peace (Lucifer Morningstar x Reader)

[Lucifer-Masterlist]

Summary: Lucifer and you were dating but your past did not make this relationship easy for you. Your mind did not want to give you the satisfaction of being happy with another person. You were certain: you could never give him peace.

Words: 2,065

Warnings: Lucifer Season 5 Part 1 spoilers, abusive parents, abusive past, talks about depression and anxiety, panic attack, language, fluff, (Y/E/C) = your eye color (please don´t read if any of these warnings trigger you  - if you need someone to talk to feel free to message me anytime <3)

Inspired by: “peace” by Taylor Swift

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

Our coming-of-age has come and gone Suddenly the summer, it's clear I never had the courage of my convictions As long as danger is near And it's just around the corner, darling 'Cause it lives in me No, I could never give you peace

It took you long enough to finally give in and go on a date with the famous Lucifer Morningstar. You guys worked alongside for the L.A.P.D and it was clear, from the very first second, that you would eventually end up together. Despite many of your protests, you let him take you out and the rest was history.

Why were you so concerned in the first place? Well, your life had not been particularly easy to say the least. It all started when you were born. Your parents were not ready to be just that: parents. Hence why they had never given you the love you desperately crave for as a child. As you grew older and started school, you had a hard time making new friends. Again, you ended up alone, nobody giving you attention. Everyone had treated you as if you were invisible. It did not take long and you did in fact start to slowly disappear. The few friendships you managed to have throughout the years ended horribly. When you told them about your parents, how they beat you, screamed at you and so on, all they did was giving you an unbelieving look. “It´s probably because you deserve it.” As a kid, hearing so many people tell you this over and over...you started believing them.

Those events concluded to you being depressed and filled with anxiety. You swore to yourself that you would never let another person get too close to you again. The ending was always the same, there was no point in trying anymore.

Despite your hard times in high school and college, you managed to get a job at the L.A.P.D and you absolutely loved to work there. Yes, some sort of teamwork was necessary but you did not have to be friends in order to be a well working team. Your colleagues were so nice to you and you would have loved to get to know them better, become friends even but you past prevented you from doing so. This rule did not apply for every single one though. For once, there was Chloe Decker, who had helped you get settled in and always made sure to reassure you of your abilities without even knowing that you struggled to believe her. Ella made you smile and laugh uncontrollably, something you were unfamiliar pretty much your entire life. Dan was this self-love-advocate you could not be mad at. He started his days off with going around the precinct and throwing an inspiring quote at you. One person, though, was something else. Lucifer´s presence seemed to calm you every time. Feeling at ease was something you were not quite used to but when he was around, you were...happy? A feeling you had never experienced before. Lucifer read you so well, he knew your past had been bad. Your face, your flinches, the constant need of reassurance gave you away. For the first few months, he did not say anything to you. What he did try, though, was trying to ask you out. Lucifer wanted to get to know you better but you did not make it easy for him, that much was sure.

Somehow, he did get you to agree to go on a date with him. The two of you started the night off at LUX but soon the crowd was growing and you felt uneasy. Not wanting to ruin your night with Lucifer, you did not say anything and tried to hide your anxiety. He sensed your feelings and suggested to head up to his apartment which you gladly accepted.

That night changed you forever. Due to the alcohol in your system, because you never drank, you started opening up to him. At the end of the night, you were seated in Lucifer´s lap, your head buried in his chest, your tears staining his shirt. Lucifer was beyond angry when you told him everything. Not at you but at everyone who had ever hurt you. You were so precious and definitely did not deserve any of the pain you had gone through. He made it his job to be there for you, to help you through it. All he wanted to do was help.

About two weeks after this incident you guys started dating but not before you warned Lucifer.

“Look, Luci...Truth is, I´m a mess. I don´t want to burden you with my problems.” your eyes focused on the floor, not wanting to see his reaction.

“Let me take care of you then.” he said, coming closer to give you a hug that made you feel at home. Because that was what he was to you: your home.

But I'm a fire, and I'll keep your brittle heart warm If your cascade ocean wave blues come All these people think love's for show But I would die for you in secret The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?

Your relationship was well received by the rest of the department. For the first time in your life, you felt true happiness and love. Yet, the demons inside your head did not make it easy for you. The voices constantly reminded you of your insecurities. There were days you did not want to get out of bed, scared you would fuck up every little task you were asked to do. It had happened multiple times before. You simply did not want to let anyone down, especially not Lucifer.

Your integrity makes me seem small

You paint dreamscapes on the wall

I talk shit with my friends It's like I'm wasting your honor

“(Y/N)? Darling, what´s wrong?” you were hiding in one of the interrogation rooms, trying to calm your panic attack that was currently going on. That was why you did not hear Lucifer storm in. He had been searching for you and his gut feeling told him there was something wrong.

“Hey, it´s okay. I´m right here.” he started by slowly touching your shoulders, not wanting to scare you and increase the panic inside of you. His touch made you look up at him. This only made you cry harder, embarrassed he saw you like that. This was the first time Lucifer saw you going through a period like that but you had told him before that you suffered from them every since you were little. He positioned himself so you were both on the floor and hugged you close to him, whispering sweet nothings in your ear. Even though you did not really understand what he was saying, your heartbeat slowed down and your breathing came back to normal. You had never recovered from a panic attack that fast before.

“I´m sorry.” you sniffed, your eyes red and puffy. Lucifer felt a sting in his chest by your appearance. It hurt him just as much knowing that you had to live with a mind that wanted to play tricks on you.

“You know there´s nothing to be sorry about.” he smiled at you, stroking your back softly.

“You could´ve everyone and yet you´re with me. I´m broken, Luci, I´m way past being saved.” His eyes widened at you confession. How could someone as beautiful as you think of yourself so horribly. To him, you were a gift he was lucky enough to receive. He never wanted to live without you next to him ever again. Words were not what you needed at the moment so he let his actions speak. His lips crashed onto yours in such a soft and loving way that made you melt into his touch. You could feel everything he was trying to say and were endlessly grateful he had saved you. Without him, who knew where you would be right now? After pulling away, he looked deeply into your (Y/E/C) eyes and whispered something that made your heart skip a beat.

“You´d do the same for me. You saved me as much as I saved you.” it was as if he read your thoughts. Lucifer always knew what to say in such situations. Yes, he could be a sarcastic, narcissistic asshole but when it counted most, he was empathetic and simply perfect. But he was right, you would do the same for him.

And you know that I'd swing with you for the fences Sit with you in the trenches Give you my wild, give you a child Give you the silence that only comes when two people understand each other Family that I chose, now that I see your brother as my brother Is it enough?

The day he saw you having a panic attack changed something in your relationship. Lucifer watched you more closely, touched you whenever he had the chance to do so. He read you so well, it seemed like he knew you better than you knew yourself sometimes. Another thing Lucifer did, something you were not aware of, was to let Chloe, Ella and Dan know about your struggles. He did that because he wanted to avoid any triggers as far as it was possible. From that time on, everyone paid close attention and it really worked. Your anxiety was not as triggered anymore and you even let them get closer to you. As close as calling them your friends. For the first time in years you had actual friends. Friends who looked after you, wanted to get to know you better, cared for you like the family you had never had. Despite all of their love, you still had down days. Days where you could cry for hours, where everything seemed to set you over the edge, where your dark thoughts haunted you. Days that made you question your relationship with Lucifer. The voices telling you that he deserved so much better than you. Were they right?

But there's robbers to the east, clowns to the west I'd give you my sunshine, give you my best But the rain is always gonna come if you're standing with me

Luckily, Lucifer knew when you where feeling down and on those days, he made you feel extra loved. Sometimes you guys took the day off and just wandered around the city, relaxed in his apartment or just cuddled in his bed. He knew what you needed without you telling him. Something you were entirely thankful for because, sometimes, you did not even know what you needed. Having him in your life was a true blessing. Who would have thought that the devil had such a soft side for a human being? 

But I'm a fire, and I'll keep your brittle heart warm If your cascade ocean wave blues come All these people think love's for show But I would die for you in secret The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?

“Luci?” your voice was barely above a whisper. The two of you were laying in his bed, just cuddling and enjoying the silence. He hummed as a sign for you to continue. You wanted to ask him a question that had been lingering in the back of your mind for a while now. Before, you were always too scared to confront him with it, thinking he would look at you like you were pathetic. Maybe you were.

“Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?” despite your quiet voice Lucifer heard you loud and clear. He pulled you closer to him. Your head was under his chin and he moved so he could kiss your forehead. Your thoughts were running wild. What would his answer be like? Would it ruin what you had? Would it ruin the only consistent thing you had ever had? Would he leave like the others did? Would it be enough if I could never give you peace? Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?

“Darling, I feel peace whenever I´m around you. Wanna know why?” a slight movement of your head made him continue. “Because I love you.”

Published (09/03/2020) by Cathy

Tags: @my-fic-corner, @daddyissuesmademe (thanks for your support <3)

#lucifer #Lucifer Morningstar #lucifer s5 #lucifer season 5 #lucifer x you #lucifer x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #tom ellis #lucifer series #lucifer one shot #lucifer on netflix #lucifer spoilers #lucifer season 5 spoilers #one shot #imagine #reader insert #fanfiction #fanfic #song fic #taylor swift #folklore #taylor swift folklore #taylor swift peace #peace #chloe decker #detective decker #Lauren German #Ella Lopez #aimee garcia #dan espinoza

[strongsassysexysloane]

Sixth Day of Twelve - A Scrumptious Mystery

The mystery of the secret surprise gifts continue.

Previously

Gif by Regal Roni

. . . .

You were unsure how people who didn't like coffee survived with little to no sleep in their system because coffee was keeping you alive until lunch time today. Sunday at work after a long case was exhausting but the condition on getting the reports done was to be out of there by early afternoon and have Monday/Tuesday off unless a high priority case came up.

You hadn't got much sleep the night before because Jack was texting you until 2am your time which was 1am her time. She shared all the food she'd eaten and the sights she'd seen on her car rides around town with Dwayne. The tiredness made filling out reports that much harder but you didn't want to end the conversation until Jack did the night before. Ok, you had it bad and it being the holiday season only made that feeling worse especially with the current secret gift giver.

Vance may regret letting her finally got to NOLA for a case, she was raving about it over text so much that.yoy were slightly worried she wouldn't board her return flight home in a few days. She'd been begging for ages and you just know she wont shut up about it when she gets back which would mean the next time Dwayne requests her assistance her badgering will be even more relentless.

Poor Vance, you chuckled to yourself.

You never wanted Dwayne on your back, Jack on the other hand... You smirked at your thought and ran it out of your mind.

Back to work, you only had a few reports to finish because Gibbs had finally cracked the neighbour in interrogation before you'd ce in this morning. He didn't actually kill the victim but admitted to hiring someone to do it for him, it was almost a perfect murder, the only thing connecting the two was his Instagram account which Jack had found yesterday before she left.

You were all busy typing away for the last two hours, furiously getting this work done so you could enjoy some quiet time. Gibbs had just gone for a coffee run, his trash can was already full of cups. It made you wonder if he actually went home last night. He was just walking back in when you stretched in your chair, cracking your back from being hunched over your keyboard for so long.

"Your order." Gibbs placed a bag on your desk next to the photo frame and phone.

"What?" You spoke before you thought. Ripping the plastic bag closer to you and peering inside to see a styrofoam box that smelled Devine.

"Elaine said you ordered lunch." He shrugged walking over to his desk.

All eyes were on Gibbs then back to you. "But i-? Did someone put you up to this?" His flat glare answered that stupid question.

Of course, Gibbs wouldn't be apart of the rouse. Or...?

Could Jack have called from NOLA?

Anyone could've made that call but he said, Elaine said you ordered. Someone was most certainly lying.

You squinted at Gibbs but he didn't flinch, move or grunt.

Some might think that was his tell when he did nothing but right now you were too hungry and confused to figure him out.

You picked out the box and opened it to reveal your favourite, cheeseburger and fries, perfect. The grumbling in your stomach demanded to be satisfied even though.yoy felt slightly guilty that no one else had lunch. That guilt lasted all of ten seconds until you took your first bite and you were on heaven. Whoever this gift giver was, you wanted to kiss them right about now. This was perfect.

Just as you took your last mouthful of food you felt your cell vibrate in your pocket. You'd switched it to vibrate after Jack's texting last.

I bet my lunch is yummier than yours!

You couldn't help the wide spread grin on your face at the picture that was attached to the few words. Nevermind the possible clue about your gift. No, the picture was amazing. You clicked save and made a mental not to add it as your wallpaper later.

Jacqueline Sloane surrounded by assortments of various dishes, food on both sides of her cheeks, hands covered in whatever she was eating with a massive grin on her face. You could make out the side of Tammy's head and you guessed Dwayne was taking the picture.

Ellie was curious at your laughter and had walked over while you were staring at your phone. "Oh my god. I hate her." She groaned, "I'm going to get ten packets of things from the break room now." She stomped out of the bullpen and you could've sworn you heard her stomach growl.

It's a close call. I got my favourite meal and I didn't even order it. You look very much in your element, Bishop is jealous, as am I.

Send.

Before Bishop was even back, there was a reply.

That's hard to beat. The Diner's cheeseburgers are to die for. Don't tell E about dessert.

Was sent with a picture of various pies and something else you didn't recognise. There mustve been a party or something because the spread was something you'd only seen on Christmas Day.

You read the message again and again. She knew your favourite meal and where it came from. It wasn't like no one knew about it, hell every time you met up with the team at the dinner that was your order unless it was breakfast time. Not that you couldn't order it for breakfast. You and Jack had been there several times for a sneaky lunch break when it wasn't busy at work. She knew, the whole office probably knew. You groaned and put your phone down. It wasn't helping getting your work done and you needed to go home to over think this over a bottle of wine and chocolate.

. . . .

Apologies if this is shorter than the rest, hard to keep up with the lengths. Thank you to everyone that's liked and commented and reblogged!! Means a lot and helps me keep writing them :)

#ncis #ncis x reader #ncis reader insert #ncis fanfic #ncis drabbles #jack sloane #ellie bishop #ncis 12 days of christmas

[adarlingwrites]

Dormouse

Summary:

After playing a game with two of The Beach's most dangerous members, the dormouse gets her tail caught by a tiger's paw.

He’ll make a wildcat out of her.

Author’s note: I kind of regret the song choice due to its association with a certain movie but... it fits the chapter's themes. -shrug-

Edit: Changed the song I associated with this chapter because I think it suits Aguni and Yamaneko's pseudo-paternal relationship, which was highlighted more than the murder mystery on the Beach

go ahead and cry, little boy | you know that your daddy did too, you know what your mama went through | you gotta let it out soon, just let it out

X

As if a spotlight had been shone on her, Yamaneko’s body tenses at everyone’s scrutiny.

“Why does this concern me?” she starts, looking at the faces around her, all of them with varying degrees of wariness, save for her fellow militants. Her eyes flick to her father’s, and resentment blooms in her chest, spreading through her veins like bitter poison.

“She’s your stepmother,” Ann responds, examining the victim’s corpse with the purpose of scrutinizing every detail. Then, her eyes flick to Mr. Yamane, looking at him with an unreadable expression. “Though, she looks more like an older sister.”

“We weren’t close. I haven’t spoken a word to her before we arrived on the Beach.”

Ann tilts the victim’s head with a gloved hand, exposing the wound to view. “I’ve yet to examine the wound, but it’s clear that whoever killed her used a sharp object. You’re one of the few militants who exclusively carry a bladed weapon, along with Last Boss.”

Folding her arms Yamaneko was about to go off on the taller woman, but she mentions something else. ”He’s under suspicion, too,” she mentions as she motioned to Mr. Yamane. “Her body was dumped from their shared room.”

“Me? That’s preposterous! Are you suggesting that I have something to do with my own wife’s death? I’m not even allowed to hold a weapon! It’s those militants you should be looking at.”

“You know what?” Yamaneko interrupts, bringing all the attention back to her when her head whips towards his direction, and her voice drips with venom at every syllable she utters. “If you can beat your first wife and your daughters for years, and lie through your teeth every time the authorities get involved, I believe you have the capacity to be violent with anyone and lie to our faces.”

“You dare accuse me when you’re the one who carries a weapon and holds a criminal record,” Mr. Yamane spits back, pointing at his estranged daughter with a wrinkled finger, spittle flying from his mouth. “I’ve raised you myself. You’re an uncontrollable child. Disobedient. Delinquent! You dirtied the family’s name when your name showed up on the tabloids twice. It’s no wonder even your sister gave up on you.”

It took every fiber of Yamaneko’s self control to stop her from lunging at her father’s provocation. Instead, she hissed through gritted teeth. “Don’t bring Mai into this. You are the reason why I had to resort to stealing! You kicked me out. I couldn’t even find an apartment without a guarantor because I was a minor. Do you think I would resort to that if I wasn’t so desperate without a family’s support? That criminal record means nothing here anyway!”

“My, my, this is a conversation you shouldn’t be having in front of strangers. Are scandals really commonplace in your family?” Niragi interrupts, and aims his rifle at Mr. Yamane’s chest. “Why don’t we just kill the old man?”

“See?! Even the company you keep reflects who you really are,” Mr. Yamane blurts, face red from rage. “No amount of discipline I tried to instill in Minami worked to keep her in check. She's a criminal. It’s why I disowned her.”

Aguni remains stoic throughout the entire ordeal, but the last thing the Yamacorp CEO said stirred something hateful inside him. He towered over Mr. Yamane in a show of intimidation. “I thought I heard you call my underling ‘daughter’ in that confrontation I broke up. So which is it?”

And just like that, Mr. Yamane’s domineering facade crumbles, stammering to answer the militants’ chief.

Hatter holds out an open palm, motioning everyone to quiet down. “These accusations won’t get us anywhere. Regardless of who killed Mrs. Yamane, peace on the Beach has been disturbed,” he mutters, expression grim, and jovial demeanor absent.

“The number of violent cases has been rising, but we have handled them quietly. This one is a public spectacle that might send ripples of fear through the entire Beach. Aguni, tell your men to go harder on their patrols and to keep themselves restrained.”

“You’re not even going to interrogate her?” Mr. Yamane exclaims, pointing at his daughter.

This time, Aguni is openly sneering at him. “Why are you so eager to accuse my underling of a murder, old man?”

The former CEO shrinks before Aguni, and any bravado he had dissipated. Yamaneko couldn’t suppress a satisfied smirk.

“Ah, Mr. Yamane, you were some corporate bigwig before coming to this country, am I right?” Hatter asks him. “As number one,” he nearly growls, voice dropping an octave. “I call the shots here. Your daughter brought back high-value cards from the games. Any member of the Beach like that is a fine asset. Unless she’s proven to be a traitor, murderer or not, no action will be taken against her without the executive board’s say.”

“Then you’re complicit in my wife’s murder. I won’t forget this,” Mr. Yamane spits, turning around to barge out the door.

Niragi scoffs at his dramatic exit. “I really want to put a bullet between his eyes. What a bastard, shitting on the military sect like that.”

“As much as I hate that asshole’s guts, you killing him right after his wife just died would just draw more suspicion to me, and the other militants,” Yamaneko replies, folding her arms and eyebrows creased.

From the corner of her eyes, Mira glances at her with a newfound curiosity.

“I think I should also mention that he begged me for help to get out of this place. The executive board should watch out. He’s known for stabbing business associates in the back to climb the ranks. My father is highly manipulative, and doesn’t stop until he gets the result that he wants,” Yamaneko adds.

“Hmm. He sounds like a potential Heart specialist too. Perhaps it runs in the family?” Mira croons thoughtfully, looking at her with the eyes of a child examining a shiny new bug she had found in the garden. “Ah, but you’re willing to impart information about your own father for the sake of the Beach and the executive board?” she asks.

Yamaneko cringes at the comparison between her and her father. “My loyalty is to the Beach, and to my chief. My chief is part of the executive board, isn’t he?”

Mira regards the CEO’s estranged daughter for a moment, and grins.

“That’s enough. Hopefully this incident is just an isolated case. Ann, if any similar cases show up, you know what to do,” Hatter said, almost with an air of boredom. And with that, Hatter leaves, adjourning the meeting.

“I do think an interrogation is in order, though. If you would allow me to borrow her for a moment, Aguni?” Ann asks, tilting her head towards Yamaneko.

Aguni’s stony expression turns sour, but he nods. The younger militant steps right ahead. “If it helps me prove that I have nothing to do with this, sure.”

The chief backs off, and he turns to the rest of the militants present. “I want to have a word with the two of you. Now.”

As the chief goes off on Niragi and Last Boss, Yamaneko follows Ann to a storage closet for cleaning supplies, and clears her throat.

“Well? We’re clearly not here to play seven minutes in heaven, so if you have a question, shoot.”

Ann rolls her eyes, expression otherwise stoic. “Right. How do you usually execute traitors?”

Yamaneko gulps, looking at her hands. “I usually aim for the carotid, or any other large artery I can target.”

“And why do you choose that method? Are there any advantages to it?” Ann asks, taking out a notepad and starting to jot down on it.

“It puts them out of their misery fast. Plus, the blood spurts in one steady stream without much spraying. It makes cleanup easier.”

Ann nods, and flips a page on the notepad. “What were you doing at around ten thirty in the morning?”

“Grabbing lunch at the lobby,” Yamaneko responds, folding her arms.

“Who were you with? Who did you speak to?”

“Last Boss. Though, I saw my father in the lobby too.”

Nodding and writing, Ann continues. “And what were you doing around two hours before the incident?”

Yamaneko hesitated for a moment, and Ann watched her like a hawk, noting the shift in her body language. Clearing her throat, the militant stammers. “I… I was having sex.”

“With whom?” Ann asks with a completely straight face, pausing from writing on the notepad.

“Is this even necessary to ask? God… I was doing it with Last Boss, obviously. I’m pretty sure some of the people in the rooms nearby heard us too,” Yamaneko says through her teeth, shifting her weight on one foot. “Can I go now?” she asks, face red.

Ann nods, and tucks away her notepad and pen. “You’re free to go.”

The militant leaves. She meets up with the others, who were receiving a tongue-lashing from the chief, and she joins their misery. Afterwards, Aguni motions at his underlings, and they follow. As they walked through the halls of the hotel, Yamaneko felt strength in their numbers.

Then, Aguni halts. “Yamane.” Her head perks up. “How many visa days do you have left?”

She pauses for a moment to think. “More than a week.”

“You’re on patrol duty with me for a few nights.”

“Right. Understood, chief.”

“Meet me tonight at the gate. You’re all free to leave.”

Niragi went ahead and trudged off, mood sour from Aguni’s reminders on the use of violence on the Beach. After checking if no one else is around, Last Boss puts an arm around Yamaneko’s waist, eyes searching hers.

“I’m okay,” she reassures him, before pressing a quick peck on his lips.

“You haven’t been on a patrol yet, haven’t you?” Takatora asked her.

“Mhmm.”

“Stay alert,” he says, voice hinting at some softness.

“Of course.”

Takatora would be lying if he said that he’s nervous about his lover’s first patrol, but as he watches Yamaneko meet up with their leader from a window, he felt some relief knowing that she’s made it far enough to rise to number sixteen and gain some semblance of trust from their chief.

Feeling a little cold from the absence of her jacket, Yamaneko walks towards Aguni, doing the best she can to look focused. She wouldn’t want to disappoint him on her first patrol.

“Yamane, eyes peeled,” Aguni said as he drew his pistol and motioned the younger militant to follow.

“Yes, chief.”

Halfway through their patrol, Yamaneko speaks up. “By the way chief, could you refer to me with my nickname instead?”

This gains her a stern, questioning look. “I don’t want to be associated with my father’s family name anymore.”

The look on Aguni’s face softens ever so slightly, and he grunts in acknowledgment.

“You don’t have to call me chief all the time,” Aguni says to her after some time as he scanned the perimeter for any suspicious activity. His underling looks up to him, a curious look on her face. She hasn’t heard the chief say much outside of games.

“But I find it respectful,” Yamaneko replies, hands hovering near her thighs, where her knives are holstered. Aguni blinks a few times before moving again.

“With proper training, you’d fit in with the SDF. There are more female recruits now, I heard.”

“Nah. I’m too much of a non-conformist for that.”

“And what makes you say that?”

Yamaneko motions to her face with one hand. “Good luck trying to scrub all this makeup off my face, chief.”

The snort he gives her sounds almost amused, but Aguni’s expression remains stern. “That attitude of yours, did it get you in trouble with your father?”

Yamaneko is taken aback from the personal question, but nonetheless, she responds to her leader. “Well, yes. I tried to suppress it and be a good daughter, I promise. Regardless, it’s just an excuse to beat me. Everything I did got me in trouble with him,” Yamaneko says almost too casually, as if her experiences weren’t the damaging, traumatic ones that lingered for years.

Old, painful memories started to stir within Aguni’s psyche upon hearing Yamaneko open up about her own upbringing. In the young woman before him, he saw shards of his past self, the angry young man who wanted to get back at his own father, but was robbed of the opportunity due to his death. His knuckles turn white from the rage simmering in his heart.

They continued walking, looking over the fences for any possible intruders. Every now and then, Aguni would tell the young militant what to watch out for, and what to do in certain scenarios. The patrol ended peacefully, much to Yamaneko’s relief. She leaned against a fence when they got back to the gate. Aguni folds his arms and observes her.

“Is there anything else you need, chief?” Yamaneko asks, a hint of nervousness in her voice.

“Yamaneko, day or night?”

“Uh, night.”

“From now on, you’re training with me every five in the afternoon, sharp.”

Eyebrows rising up her forehead, Yamaneko has a dumbfounded look on her face. “Training? For what?”

“Do you want to gain an edge over your bastard father, or not?”

One look in the chief’s eyes, and she knew he had similar experiences in the past; of feeling small and powerless against someone who should have been one’s shelter from the world. “Yes.”

“Then don’t be late.”

Aguni leaves, while a dumbfounded Yamaneko stays in her spot, still processing the events of the day. Cold fingers trail on her good shoulder and she turns to see her lover’s face. A smile blooms on her painted lips.

“Takatora. You didn’t attend a game?”

“I was patrolling on the upper floors. I can’t leave you here on the Beach alone either.”

“Ah,” she replies, holding his hand as they walk back to their room. “I guess we deserve a little break from all the madness of the games.”

After some time, as they lay on their shared bed, Yamaneko asks her lover a question. “Are you worried about my father being here?”

He nods, and squeezes her small hand.

“Don’t worry too much. Besides, the chief said he’ll be training me every five in the afternoon. I’ll kick the bastard’s ass if he tries anything.”

Takatora tilts his head. “The chief?” he asks almost disbelievingly.

“Yeah. It’s kind of strange.”

“You didn’t do anything to earn his ire, didn’t you?”

Yamaneko raises an eyebrow. “No.”

“Good luck. He’s... strict.”

“I know, I know.”

The first day she trained with Aguni, she expected it to be difficult, but not this severe. The wildcat pants as she ran her second lap around the Beach, sweat dripping from her skin and stinging the healing burns on her left arm. Onlookers were staring, and some militants were chuckling among themselves. Niragi sees her, and yells after her.

“Yamaneko, what the hell are you doing?”

“Chief wanted me to run laps!” she shouts, voice hoarse.

“What did you do?”

“Huh?” Yamaneko asks, irritation growing. “No time to talk, gotta run!”

Hanako, the militant who once accompanied her in the dressing room, watches as Yamaneko jogs past her, raising an eyebrow. “Huh. When the chief asks us to do something like that, it’s usually because we pissed him off,” she mutters.

“She must’ve pissed him off bad, then,” Saiko butts in, passing the other girl a cigarette.

As fast as her legs can take her, Yamaneko sprints at the last few meters when Aguni comes into view. As she runs past him, she collapses and lies on the ground. Her feet ache, and it doesn’t help that her sandals aren’t made for running.

“What the hell are you doing? You need to cool down. Walk!” he barks, and Yamaneko suppresses a pathetic sigh as she forces herself up. She paces around in circles, occasionally stretching her arms and legs. Satisfied, Aguni lets her sit, and he tosses her a bottle of water. She gulps it down.

“I’m gonna hit the showers now, chief,” she pants, and Aguni tilts his head.

“You think you’re done for the day?” he asks.

Yamaneko couldn’t answer, looking at him in disbelief.

“Not yet, you’re not. You still have some grapples and knife techniques to study. Stand up!”

She swore she wanted to cry, but Yamaneko kept her mouth in a tight line, swallowed hard, and got on her feet.

“This is nothing compared to the shit I endured in the past,” she thinks to herself, and carries on.

Two. Three. Five. Ten times, she ended up on her ass, disarmed and beaten by the chief every single time. As she was starting to reconsider what she thought earlier, the chief holds a meaty hand out, and she grabs it. Aguni helps her to her feet, and pats her back, almost making her lurch forward.

Yamaneko freezes at the friendly touch. All the touches she got from authority figures, her father especially, was nothing like this.

“Focus on your footwork.”

Then, he leaves without saying anything else. Tired, bruised, but fulfilled, Yamaneko shouts a spirited “Yes, chief!” as he walks away.

Taking a deep breath, the younger militant finishes what’s left of her water, and heads back to her shared room. Takatora is waiting inside, fresh from a patrol, and upon seeing her sweaty and disheveled form, he lets go of whatever he was reading to check on her.

Yamaneko holds two thumbs up and beams at him, voice failing her.

“Did the chief go too hard on you?”

“No. Well, yes. But, it’s fine. I learned a lot,” she says as she sits next to him. “You know, he’s more of a parental figure to me than my own father.”

Takatora snorts at the idea of Aguni being a father, but the more he thought about it, the more he agreed with her. He’ll never say it out loud, though.

On the tenth day of Yamaneko’s training, in the middle of sparring with the chief, one of Hatter’s men approached them.

“Aguni. Please come with us. Take her with you too,” he says in an urgent manner, brows furrowed in concern.

“You better have a good reason for this interruption,” he growls, picking up a towel and slinging it over his shoulder.

“There’s been another killing. Please take care of it discreetly. Hatter doesn’t like it when things like this goes public.”

A lump forms in Yamaneko’s throat as she follows Aguni to the hotel room holding the victim. When they arrived, Ann was there, assessing the situation, and the victim sprawled on the floor, a diagonal cut on his neck. A few men were setting up a stretcher nearby, and they halted when they saw the leader of the militants enter the room.

“It’s similar to the previous case,” Ann starts, taking off her shades. “The wounds are consistent with the type I found on Mrs. Yamane. A laceration to the neck with a sharp object,” she continues, holding a clean handkerchief and tilting the victim’s head. “And this time, the glass fragments stuck on his skin are more obvious. Whoever committed these murders used a shard of glass as an improvised weapon.”

The taller woman turns to Yamaneko. “I’ve corroborated your statement with the other residents on your floor. They indeed heard you that morning, so you couldn’t have been with your stepmother. Your method of exsanguinating traitors before disposal doesn’t align with the ones used in these murders, either. The odds of you being the killer are low, from this information.”

“Any clue on the killer's identity?” Aguni asks, watching the corpse. The victim died with his eyes wide open, the look of terror etched on his face.

“We have a lead,” says Ann, full of cold confidence. “For now, bring her to the makeshift lab discreetly. I need to do a full autopsy.”

Boots thudding against the floor, Aguni walks towards the corpse, and hooks his arms under his armpits. Instinctively, Yamaneko grabs his feet. As they lay him down on the stretcher, the victim’s mangled arm, riddled with stab wounds due to his attempt of protecting himself from his assailant, slips and dangles off the edge. Looking around, Yamaneko grabs the end of a curtain, and puts it back in place. The victim’s Beach tag, number 28, reflects the moonlight streaming from the window, and Yamaneko’s eyes trail to the glittering mess of broken glass on the floor, which contrasts with the dark blood splatters on the wood.

“Hey, Ann,” she calls her attention. “I think I found the murder weapon.”

The taller woman hands her the handkerchief, and she picks up a large shard of glass, its pointed end jagged and stained with blood. Ann holds it out in the light, making out some fingerprints.

“Good,” she said, then she prompts them to follow.

“That face is going to haunt me,” one of Hatter’s men comments, and Yamaneko gulps.

“Me too,” she adds.

Hatter’s devotee looks at the militant, a question hanging from his open mouth, but he chooses to keep it shut. Sensing his hesitation, Yamaneko rolls her eyes and quietly gets to work.

Glancing at the dead’s face, whose eyes were frozen in an expression of distress, Yamaneko grimaces and closes his eyes with her fingers. She pulls the curtains off the rods, and covers his bloody body. The crimson quickly soaks through the fabric.

That night, the wildcat sat in the bath longer than usual.

Wading over to his lover’s side, Takatora helps Yamaneko settle into his chest as he wraps both arms around her. In silence, she mulls about her day, brows furrowed.

“You’re bothered by something,” Takatora speaks up.

“I had to carry a corpse with the chief earlier. And my father is still living on the Beach. Ugh. Takatora, I just want to get away from all this. I mean, I’m not going to leave and turn traitor. I crave some change of scenery, maybe explore some places outside the Beach.”

Playing with Yamaneko’s hair, Takatora presses his mouth behind her head. “Supply runners leave for food and gasoline at eight in the morning. I help put away the gas when they return in the afternoon.”

Yamaneko looks up to give him a mischievous grin. “Do you think we can scare them into driving for us?”

He nods, and she laughs with a childish giddiness.

“Great! There’s this place I’ve been wanting to visit again.”

#alice in borderland #aib #Imawa no Kuni no Alice #Imawa no Kuni no Arisu #last boss x oc #takatora samura x oc #oc: minami yamane #last boss #takatora samura #morizono aguni #suguru niragi #takeru danma #hatter #fanfic: dormouse #fanfiction #character study