#and it’s been like 3 since i’ve had a full blown panic attack | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fluffallamaful · 2 years

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Something admittedly does rub me the wrong way about pet!Dream apologizing to Quackity for “misleading” him. Like, the whole timeline is that 1) Quackity’s torture assisted in damaging him so much that he had no choice but to revert back to this form for an extended period of time, 2) Quackity finds him in the middle of nowhere and decides to keep him as a pet, 3) Quackity and Dream bond in a weird little dynamic where Dream is under the impression that he will be murdered brutally and painfully if he is found out and 4) Dream escapes the moment he has the chance. Frankly, I’d even say that he’d be completely in the right even if he took advantage of Quackity’s hospitality entirely instead of escaping as quickly as he could. He never really did anything to Quackity except for his (failed) attempt to destroy Las Nevadas (he blew up a path and a wall and was swarmed by an army of slime men — Charlie is the only one who actually got any sort of victory that day a la taking back his own personal autonomy from the guy who tried to shape him into his own image). And even that was in response to three months of daily torture so brutal that Quackity frequently left covered in his blood (which apparently felt like six months to him, according to Punz — and I don’t see why either of them would lie about that since I don’t think Purpled gave a shit about the actual duration — especially since it’s already been established that his sense of time had been completely screwed up in the prison) (no clock).

If I may make an alteration:

Dream is huddled beneath a bush, letting out squeaky little hiccups as the rain pours down around him. His cover is blown, his taste of family has just been shot to bits, and he’s pretty sure people are going to be coming after him soon. Which is really bad because he still hadn’t recovered fully and he certainly can’t run faster than any of them.

He hears footsteps. He recognizes them as Quackity’s immediately and begins to panic — especially when the man halts right in front of his bush. There’s no way out. He’s caught. He wonders if he’s going to make it quick and then disregards the notion entirely: Quackity enjoyed his visits in Pandora.

But instead of reaching for him, Quackity — sits down. And he begins to sing quietly.

It’s an old tune. Something cheesy and sweet, the kind of thing you’d expect to hear in an old movie about candy and flowers and true love’s kiss. The kind of thing you’d hear from your grandmother as a baby. Maybe it’s in Spanish and Dream doesn’t even know what any of the lyrics mean, but melodies are universal so it doesn’t matter.

It takes a while. But eventually Dream pokes his head out, just barely. He’s wet and he’s cold, and if Quackity reaches for him now there’s no way he’d be able to run in time, but nothing happens. Quackity glances at him with soft eyes and then averts his gaze again, continuing to sing.

Maybe he’s being stupid. Maybe he’s naive — maybe Quackity being nice to him these past few weeks has turned his brain to jelly. He’ll regret this, probably. But he stays until Quackity finally begins to trail off the melody, transitioning to watching him in silence.

It’s quiet. The rain has stopped.

“I’ve got some soup back home,” Quackity finally says. “It’s still warm. …And if it’s not, I can always heat it up again.”

He knows it’s a stupid move. But he’s tired and he’s wet and he’s cold, and Quackity’s offer is so much more tempting now that he’s had a taste of it. So he accepts.

The man sneaks him past the clearing full of people. They are still arguing.

As it turns out, Quackity was telling the truth. A bowl of hot soup is waiting for them back at his house, and he doles up a bowl and moves to sit down. He takes a spoon and carefully lifts out a bite, holding it out for Dream to take.

It’s good.

(To be clear: I’m not trying to make a personal attack against you or anything! Just something I was thinking.)

ok you have very excellent points here and yes don’t worry i understand where you’re coming from and love love love hearing your thoughts on the lore :D

(discussion nelowww)

🦙🦙…

i think that it’s kinda almost the same as the tommy apology to dream?? like i didn’t really see it as blob dream forgiving quackity,, i saw it almost as him apologising about that fact that he had hopped around to so many different server members,, and didn’t tell quackity about what was going on. but i also think that i put it in there as almost a vulnerable moment for dream. he shouldn’t really be the one apologising at all :(( and yet he’s wet and cold and there’s a million thoughts rushing through his head and he feels like he’s lost something that he actually enjoyed. and so the pitiful squeak is all that comes out of him

but i do actually prefer your ending better where dream is far more scared of quackity. where quackity has to coax him out more because dream is genuinely scared of him. perhaps there’s a moment where quackity actually makes the connection that the majority of the reason as to why the blob is beaten up in the first place is because of him. like he starts off by crouching down and being hurt about the fact that dream lied, but then suddenly realises throughout his monologue that hang on wait,, why would dream tell the truth? what could he have possibly done for dream in the past that would cause him to trust him?

like having a moment for quackity in the rain where he just goes through a mass self-reflection,, with dream still panicked, sopping-wet, and holding his breath from beneath his bush. but i guess it’s like one of those moments where characters realise that dream is just a human like the rest of them,, and really they’ve all done bad things. if what punz said about dream motives is true then quackity doesn’t really have the heart to just leave him out here

he starts singing his song (cute 🥺),, im tempted for it to be a song that he used to sing to slime? or something like that. either way the image of quackity singing a song while both of them are drenched and miserable in the rain is :( but perfect.

i also like your touch of dream crawling his way out and not being fully trusting of quackity, just feeling like he’s got no other choice. the promise of soup does sound nice.

i think that quackitys character has promise for self reflection and change. which is why it’s still cute that he’s the one that brings dream back to the community house. but perhaps it takes dream a little longer to fully trust him

🦙🦙🦙…

#llama asks #your points are always so well thought out they’re so cool #lore with llama #soup the destroyer #Soups Pet Blob AU

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moonjxsung · 2 months

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hi hi angel!!! how are you?

it’s been sorta insane for me in the worst way (things are kinda better rn). long story short, i have two classes with the same professor and we had the final project (that i clutched super insanely and got a 98!! yay we love that) but i don’t have the best grades in the other class. so the thing is that since i don’t have the best grade in that one i obsessively check for her feedback on assignments and to see if there’s new assignments posted. and i randomly check yesterday and there’s two assignments that i had never seen (but she mentioned them at the start of the semester). i click on them and the assignments were overdue by like 2 months and i start having a full blown panic attack in the class. and i wait for it to finish and i ask to talk to her and i literally start bawling bc i thought that i hadn’t sent them. and she’s just like “take a breath, don’t worry, nobody sent them. idk what happened to the platform but it seems that they were never visible to anyone.” so yeah, i had a panic attack for nothing. but i told her about how overwhelmed and anxious ive been and that im back on pills and it’s been super hard too. and, she’s very strict but she was very nice about it and told me that she was always there if i needed to talk. and reassured that i wasn’t failing.

so yeah, i need my emotional support barbie/bratz too!! let’s make them happen. i looooove barbie and bratz movies soooo much but i hadn’t found anywhere to watch them until now :((( but i shall continue this weekend!!

for my mom’s bday we ate mofongo! idk if you’ve ever tried it but it’s soooo yum.

ateez, skz and shinee comebacks are literally insane, neither my wallet or my mental health can process it. i’m so excited!!!

tattoo update: im getting it done on monday!! i’m so excited!! i rlly want a piercing too but i rlly rlly want a skzoo </3

the fact that you’ve been having shinee dreams is sooo slay!! i’ve only had one shinee dream ever and it was literally the day i first saw the ring ding dong video like in 2012. (i beg you my unconscious or wherever dreams come from, give me some minho dreams🙏🏻). and im still soooo traumatized from my hyunjin dream, i will never be able to take a nude without thinking about that </3.

(i almost forgottt!!! i had never read the tv girl felix fic!! i’ve been getting into tv girl lately bc i saw that you really liked them and i love every playlist you’ve done for your fics so i trust ur judgment. anyways, not allowed felix is my new roman empire <3)

i missed u bb! i had two frozen mochas in ur honor with my classmates <3 i hope you’re well! and that ur weekend goes sooo well and that you can give everyone hickeys <3

-🐈‍⬛

Hi baby!!!!!!! I’m so sorry to hear this week has been so stressful :((

I’m so glad your professor was so understanding about it! I looooove when professors take the time to hear you out and give you a second chance at doing an assignment. I had something really similar happen in my freshman year of college where we had these textbook quizzes that were optional, but you had to at least open it to get credit and I didn’t know they had due dates bc they were optional so I realized like halfway through the semester I was missing a good HALF of them and I cried my eyes out so hard when I found out. I talked to my professor and she was super understanding about it because I’d gotten good grades on her tests so far and I never skipped any lectures so she reopened all the assignments for me and let me resubmit them 🥹 like all it takes it some communication!! Thankful for good professors and especially ones who understand when you’re going through a rough time. I hope things get easier and I’m always here for you if you need anything at all bby 🫶💘💓💗

I’m planning on bedrotting all weekend so catch me watching bratz & Barbie movies too LMAO I need to heal my inner child 🧘‍♀️🕯️🕯️🕯️

I have never heard of mofongo but I just looked it up and it looks AMAZINGGGG oh my god I need to try it so bad

PLEASE I need to be saving so badly I am NAWTTTT ready for skz/shinee/Ateez comebacks at all!!!! I want to go to 2 cities for Ateez if I can but the prices are so much higher than I thought they would be so I think I might just try for VIP in my city and hopefully get send-off! I need to be face to face with Yeosang at least once in my life 😔🫶

SOOOOOO EXCITED FOR YOUR TATTOOOOOO BABY AHHHHHH I CANT WAIT TO SEE IT !!

Onew dreams fulfill me so much I swear I wake up with the biggest wave of SADNESSSS bc I’m so sad we’re not married irl 💔💔 he also smells vvvv good I love him so much

PLEASE not allowed Felix fic is making its rounds again since I linked it to that anon and I still hate it just as much as I used to lfmfnkdemdnmsjjfjf it’s coming up on its year anniversary so I won’t shit on it tooooo much since it was the start of this blog (but realistically WTRS was the start) but oh goddd I hate it 😭 still love TV girl tho TV GIRL MY BELOVEDDDD 😔🫶🫶🫶🫶

I missed you so much bby I’m gonna have some good coffee tomorrow in your honor and bring a cute pc!!!! Have the bestest rest of your week I love you so so so much 🫶💓💖💞💘💗💕💓👼

#🐈‍⬛ anon #ask

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deadgodwriting · 2 years

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I don’t think I’ve ever really felt love before. I know I told you I had, but I don’t think that’s true. I think that in all honesty I didn’t even know what love really was until feeling it with you. And, I think part of that is that I’ve never felt my love returned until now. I had loved but it never really grew into what it could ultimately become. Love feeling unconditional is so so foreign to me. I’m still having to get over the idea that if I criticize you you’ll lash out at me. It’s part of why I almost never argue back very hard, or if I really want to make a point I like doing it when you’re asleep or after you leave and I can send it in a message. Because in all honesty I am a very broken person at this point lmao. Like there’s no hiding it. I try tip toeing about the fact I’ve been abused a lot but I think at this point it’s just obvious. I’ve been in 5 relationships before you. Each lasting: 1-2 months, almost 2 months, 1 1/2 years, 2-5 months (2 dating, 3 fwb but mixed together), and over 5 years. And that’s only counting ones lasting at least a month. There’s 3 other people I had asked out and agreed but we broke up either after a day, 2 days, or a week. And I started dating at 13. My first kiss on the lips was actually after the first time I had been kissed on the neck to my memory. Part of the reason I don’t like kissing with tongue is it’s just a bad sensory thing and also because I had someone force their tongue in my mouth, like multiple times. That same person was my first kiss. And first groped me. And first kinda *tried* to rape me, but gave up because I looked too terrified. There was two police reports but my parents prevented me from doing anything about it and gaslighted me about it. The second person was violent. One of the first things he did was when I was telling him to stop getting into fights, and not be friends with a guy who stabbed him, etc, he said that i was lucky he loved me or liked me so much (just don’t remember) because if he didn’t he would break my nose for asking all those things of him. He started pressuring me for sex. And then after I still wasn’t willing fast enough he told me he would cheat on me if I didn’t and I think even made me cry about it. So we had sex in a park bathroom like, somewhat shortly after I had turned 14. He also knew about the fact I had just been molested by the other person. So..... that was interesting lol. I also got to have my first pregnancy scare at 14. I had to walk to the local grocery store and buy my own pregnancy tests, and on the way there I was debating whether I would keep it if I was pregnant. I had to use what little cash I had too since I didn’t have an allowance most of my life, just holiday money. My parents found out I was sexually active and put me on birth control shortly after. So. Anyways uhh. He was the same guy that hit me, and like mentally tortured me for fun. To the point I would have full blown panic attacks that then led to shutting down and like rocking in the corner of my closet sometimes without the light even on because I had no more crying left in my body. But the time he hit me uh, basically I was scared of him being violent. And it was his 15th birthday and I was over at his house and he insisted that I go look at his knife collection that I really didn’t want to see because again, scared. But I had to go look and while showing me knives he poked me under the nail with one and I jumped and got scared because it hurt. Not a lot, or drew blood, but I got scared. And he started laughing at me. Which then sent me into a meltdowm/shutdown. I startedd being very quiet and reserved and just scratching at myself like I told you I used to do. Hoping he would notice and try and stop me and comfort me about scaring me but he really didn’t care. And then his parents dropped us off at the movies cause again it was hi sbirthday. And so we sat and I kept being quiet and scratching at myself. And he finally noticed and started telling me to stop and I didn’t because I was panicking. So he stormed out, which then made me panic more because any time he was mad it would be horrible, so I followed. And when we were outside he said he was going to call his dad which I super didn’t want because he made his parents hate me and I knew they wouldn’t let me talk to him for who knows how long, so I took his phone and tucked it in my bra and kept asking him to just go back and watch the movie. But he refused, and started destroying some plants that were planted outside the movie theater. I really didn’t like seeing him hurting the plants so I started telling him to stop, and he didn’t, so I started slapping his arm/hand away when he would try. And then I guess I did it harder at some point and he got pissed and I was sobbing and apologizing and I said he could hit me back, so he slapped me across the face. Which I think made me freeze because I didn’t expect him to actually do it. And then if I remember correctly I think we argued a little more, he got more pissed, shoved his hand down my bra and grabbed his phone, called his dad, and then his dad basically yelled at me while I cried as he drove me home. And then yeah I wasn’t allowed to talk to him for a few days for “ruining his birthday”. Uh, lots of other things wrong with him. That relationship messed me up probably the worst out of any of them. The last time I saw him in person I had such a bad panic attack I literally ran away and had to lock myself somewhere to hide because I was terrified and was shaking violently. Luckily I seem to be doing a lot better because I can like see an old photo of him and not start shaking lol. But when I was talking about like being 14 and drinking gatorade mixed with extract it was because I was with him. I uh also used to self harm a decent amount. I never cut but I would like get a pencil or pen and would just draw a straight line into my skin over and over until I got through the top or more layers of skin. I have some very mild scars on my chest from it. I probably did it a total of like 30 times? Last time being like, last year or maybe earlier this year because it became a coping skill from handling abuse. Which like, my ex wife also was abusive. There were points I genuinely broke down and told her that I felt like I was being held hostage and was in the relationship against my will only because I didn’t have money if I wasn’t with her and I didn’t want to have to get rid of all my animals because I couldn’t pay to feed them. And like sobbed and begged for her to just treat me better or to help me get away from her. And I even told her that sometimes us having sex felt like I was a prostitute or was being raped cause again, I didn’t want to be in the relationship I was only there because I literally had no ability to have money otherwise because I tried holding a very part time (5 hours a week) job and just couldn’t with how sick I am, or can get during a flare up. And also like.... I may have been molested or raped before the age of 2? Complete unknown, because I have no memories, but I had weird behaviors as a kid that looking back like my mom and 1-2 of my therapists have agreed like it’s a possibility for sure? So. Anyways uh. I also wrote my first suicide note when I was like a small kid. Maybe before i entered middle school. It was on purple construction paper and had a little stick figure hanging themselves like if you failed hangman from school lol. I was a very not mentally healthy kid and started therapy and medication at either 13 or 12? And then kept getting worse because even more abuse. And there for a while I was basically just mentally Gone. Like I hallucinated, was delusional, just like mentally Not There. They even thought I had DiD at one point. Because on top of all the abuse was also the like, forced isolation from my parents. So I barely interacted with anyone and if I did it was like one of my significant others who almost always abused me. Or my parents who also abused me. So like my brain started inventing shit To Cope lol. I’m 98% better from all that shit though. Really the main thing is I still sometimes will like feel a bug on my skin that isn’t there or something. Or like I’ve mentioned a couple times I can get really scared at night trying to fall asleep because my brain will come up with images of monsters and give me really bad anxiety about it. And unfortunately the only way I ever found to cope with that is sleeping with someone because idk why but that really calms me down. I still also get like anxiety/ptsd and will easily panic from things or have a hard time trying to speak up about things sometimes. That whole Fear of Abandonment thing which I feel like you also easily get. At least from the times you completely panicked at the thought of me wanting to leave you over something. I get that really easily and also worry like “I’m being annoying, I’m talking too much, I ask for too much, I take up too much space, it’s okay if laying like this is hurting me because it’s annoying to ask to move” like my brain just insists I should make myself as small and as quiet as possible so I’m less of a burden to deal with. And I have a hard time voicing my thoughts sometimes because I worry if I do it will upset you and you’ll either break up with me which would break my heart or you’d snap at me and be angry or yell or ignore me or otherwise like hurt me and that also scares me because like? I might just let you if that were to happen. And find a way to rationalize why I deserved it. So anyways moral of the story: surprise you fell in love with someone who’s basically the equivalent of a kicked puppy who would probably start literally shaking if you yelled at me in anger. Or would shut down and immediately do literally anything you asked me including sexual things out of this ingrained fear and need to please whoever is angry to get them to stop as quickly as possible.

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i-spaced-sorry · 2 years

Text

Rough Night

Hailey x Jay x Halstead!sister When the reader has a rough day she goes to Jay but ends up getting help from Hailey. Warning: mentions of panic attacks, anxiety, mentions of self harm (not graphic more on the vague side of things)

Please know that you are loved and people care about you! If you are struggling please reach out to someone you trust!

‘Please be home. Please be home’ you thought to yourself while you knocked on your brother’s door. You hadn’t had a bad night in just a little over 3 months, but you woke up this morning and felt like it was going to be one. You had tried to enact your safety plan. You put on your comfy outfit ~ your ‘we’ll all just be skeletons one day’ pajama pants that had pockets and your oversized sweatshirt Will had given you. ~ you also tried to distract yourself the majority of the day by watching your comfort shows.

But now it was nearing 9pm and you could feel yourself spiraling and knew you had to get out of your apartment. Instead of calling Jay to let him know you were coming, you decided to just walk to his place. The walk over should have been easy, but you felt on edge and were constantly looking over your shoulder.

Now here you stood in front of his door on the verge of tears just wanting to be in the embrace of your favorite big brother.

“Y/N?!” questioned Hailey as she opened the door.

‘Fuck! Jay either wasn’t home or Hailey and him were in the middle of something’ you thought.

“What’s going on?” inquired Hailey as she saw your change of facial expression.

“Uh, is Jay here?” you felt your voice waver as you spoke.

“He actually just ran to the store” responded Hailey.

Looking behind you, you shifted on your feet before looking down at the horrid maroon carpet that was in the hallway of Jay’s apartment complex. “Oh, I’ll just go then” you said.

As you turned to walk away, Hailey called out, “Hey! You can come in if you want. He should be right back.”

You smiled and nodded as she led you inside. Once she closed the door she walked you to the couch and the two of you sat down.

“Is this a ‘only my big brother can help me’ situation, or can I get in the loop?” asked Hailey, breaking the silence.

You pulled your knees up to your chest and sighed, “I’m not sure if you would understand.”

“You could always say it to me and if I can’t help, then we can just wait for Jay.”

“Ok,” you began.

Breathing you laid back and went criss cross applesauce in your spot and began to explain.

“So, ever since I started college, I’ve been on meds for Anxiety. I haven’t had a bad day or a full blown panic attack since getting on the meds. But 2 months ago, I had a really rough night and Jay ended up walking me off the edge. I’ve been doing really well since then. I haven’t been so overwhelmed with life and have taken a step back from certain things, and I even made it one month clean for the first time in a year and half, but uh I don’t know I woke up today and just felt off. I enacted my safety plan but I just am so overwhelmed! Everyone is telling me to be happy since happy things are happening such as me graduating in a week and all of these other things, but I’m more overwhelmed and - and” and before you knew it the hoover dam in your eyes finally broke and you were sobbing.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay to be overwhelmed! I totally understand what you're going through!” soothed Hailey while pushing back your hair.

“Really? But you're so confident and badass” you sobbed.

Chuckling to herself, Hailey spoke softly, “I wasn’t always this confident. I too was plagued with anxiety and was on meds for a while.”

Wiping the back of your hand under your nose, you smiled, “really?”

Smiling, Hailey added, “really. And can I let you in on a little secret?”

You nodded.

“I’m also in recovery” she whispered.

Your eyes went wide! You couldn’t believe the badass, confident cop who was banging your brother was also in recovery, “What!?!” You exclaimed!

Hailey nodded and laughed, “yea, for 10 years. It does get easier, the urges will die down and it also helps to have a good support system. Which it seems like you have.”

“10 years?!? I can’t even envision making it past 1 year!” you whispered.

Before Hailey could say more, the door opened and Jay appeared with some milk and a grocery bag.

“I’m back! We can - Y/N!” he began before realizing you were sitting on his couch with puffy red eyes.

Rushing over he knelt down in front of you and spoke softly, “Hey, are you okay? Are you having a rough night”

You nodded and spoke, “Yea, but Hailey helped!”

Looking at his wife, Jay smiled, “Well I’m glad she could help! Since you're here, do you want to help us make cake? We were going to make some and bring some to you, but since your here”

“Sure!” you smiled and the three of you went to make cake you realized that you had a new person you could turn to when you're having a rough day!

THANKS FOR READING! THIS WAS REALLY SELF INDULGENT SINCE I WAS HAVING A ROUGH NIGHT! FEEL FREE TO REBLOG/LIKE AND GIVE ME FEEDBACK

#hailey halstead #hailey upton #jay halstead #jay halstead x reader #hailey upton x reader #one chicago imagine #jay halstead imagine #hailey upton imagine

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softxsuki · 2 years

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hello sweetheart!! may I please have a letter for your valentine's day event? i was thinking about Dabi with a villain!gn!reader who's like a sibling for him, and i would like if he call they by doll. they enter in l.o.v at the same time - with toga, so they knows each other enough to know when the other is in a bad mood. reader is in college and they are overwhelmed because all the lessons, exams coming over and the missions that shigaraki propouse to them, and dabi see they [...] - 🍇 anon

Dabi's Comforting Letter To His Friend Who's Like A Sibling To Him

Valentine's Day Letter Event Masterlist (CLOSED)

Pairing: Dabi x Gn!Reader (Platonic)

Warnings: feeling overwhelmed

Genre: Comfort

Post-Type: Letter

Word Count: 480

Summary: In which you fall asleep after having a panic attack and find a letter next to you when you wake up. It's from Dabi and he writes comforting words to you in hopes that it helps you feel calm.

[A/N: Heya 🍇anon, Happy (late) Valentine's Day! Thank you so much for your patience and understanding, but I finally got this done for you! It's been a long day. I think I've been writing now for over 12 hours, but I only have 3 more letters to edit and post after this one and I'll be done, so I'm gonna keep pushing forward. I hope you enjoy this letter from Dabi. It was nice writing a platonic letter for a change :).]

It was hours after your anxiety attack that occurred from feeling overwhelmed about your studies and your LOV duties. You ended up falling asleep and had just woken up, finding yourself alone in your room which was now dark compared to how light it was earlier.

You reach for the lamp on your nightstand and click it on as the room floods with light. A certain folded paper catches your attention on your bed, next to where you were just lying.

Curiously, you reach for it, unfold it, and begin to read it’s contents;

Y/N,

Hey doll. Just wanted to check up on you, but I saw that you were already sleeping so I decided to just leave this letter here for when you woke up. I know it must be hard keeping up with those difficult college courses along with the missions Shiggy assigns you, but you’re doing so well.

You’re like a younger sibling to me and I know you trust Toga with these things, so I’m glad you at least have someone to talk to, but I wish you could come to me as well, so I know what’s up and can help you. I’m proud of how hard you work on your studies, which you definitely don’t even need to be doing now that you’re with us, but you continue on and I admire that. Keep up the great work. But next time you feel overwhelmed, reach out to someone, I don’t care who, just don’t let it pile up so high on your chest to the point where you go into a full blown anxiety attack, please.

Anyway, it’s Valentine’s Day so I figured maybe hearing a few nice words with some brotherly love might help you feel better, so here it is…

Sometimes it’s hard keeping up with the amount of energy that you have, but it’s nice seeing you get along with everyone here and knowing that you’re enjoying yourself. Since we arrived at the LOV at the same time, I’ve seen you grow so much since then.

You look so cool whenever you get lost in doing something you love like drawing or designing; I’m sure you’ll be able to utilize those hobbies even more in the future. But yeah…I hope you’re feeling better. Let me know if you need anything.

Sincerely,

Dabi.

You never took Dabi as the thoughtful type, but you were grateful to have an older brother figure while you were here–someone to watch over you and comfort you whenever you needed it. You felt a lot lighter and ready to get back to your responsibilities after your nap and from the encouraging words Dabi had written to you.

You take a seat at your desk and continue on with your studies while gently holding onto the necklace around your neck that matched the one Dabi had.

You’d definitely have to thank him later.

EVENT REQUESTS ARE CLOSED

REGULAR REQUESTS ARE OPEN

Posted: 2/14/2022

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raisans-art · 3 years

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What the Fuck Are these Characterizations: The Essay

Full warning: This is only concerning Tommy's stream made today, 4/29/2021. I know Ranboo has streamed after Tommy but I haven't watched that.

On with the essay.

A lot happened.

Tommy tried to kill Dream, Dream actually killed Ghostbur, Wilbur is back (pog). It's a lot. A lot of plot and a lot of emotions. I will preface this with the usual "holy hell these people are pretty damn good actors for having no formal training as far as I'm aware." They get their emotions across very clearly and that's kinda why I'm making this in the first place. The way some of the characters acted in Tommy's 4/29 stream is a bit odd in my opinion.

Now, I will concede that I have not been diligent with the Dream SMP lore. I've been given broad strokes and have seen various clips but I have definitely not been on top of it. I may have missed streams entirely and you all more avid fans may be able to name scenes that I haven't seen that rationalize some of these reactions that I will be criticizing. If you can, please do so! I'd love to start a dialogue over this!

So, how I'm gonna break this all up is to take a look at Tommy, Wilbur, Ranboo, and Awesamdude and how their CCs characterized them during the stream. I'll sing praises where they are due and point out my criticisms where they arise. Then, I will try to surmise some meta as to why I think these characterizations came to be in the first place.

Tommy

Tommy, to me, has the best characterization in this. CC Tommy clearly has a very good sense of what he wants from his character and has been playing into that line of thought from the beginning of this whole debacle.

Tommy is scared, paranoid, and pissed off. Ever since he left the prison he avoids taking damage like the plague, rambles indecisively, is easily sent into a panic, and is hypersensitive to the people around him. He panics when he sees weapons out and one crucial thing that he made clear from the start was that he wants Dream dead.

Straight out of limbo, Tommy concludes that Dream needs to die. From there he plans this whole mission with Ranboo, Tubbo, and Ghostbur to get in and kill Dream. He says that Dream can't keep living with this power at his fingertips, and from before his final death, Tommy clearly wants to be rid of his abuser, adding a personal layer to his plan. Tommy is stubborn and determined since the beginning, sacrificing his life and disks for L'manberg and refusing to believe that his home is gone until the place is blown to bedrock. Of course, he would stick to his plan to a T.

Now, is this a smart decision to sneak into the highest security area in the entire SMP? Fuck no. It's a stupid idea. Even if Tommy hadn't messed up, Sam would've seen Dream die to a floating axe and kept Tommy and Ghostbur in that containment cell. It would've been a one-way ticket, especially given what we see of Sam in this stream.

But this all makes sense for the character CC Tommy is playing. Tommy isn't thinking about how smart of a decision this is and he hardly ever does when he takes action. He shoots from the hip, takes his first instincts, and acts on them.

It's easy to draw a clear line of progression of Tommy as a character from season 1 to this moment in season 3 and past Ghostbur's death. His hyperventilating as he tries to get his plan to work after it failed, Trying to save Ghostbur from what he went through, lashing out at Sam, and yelling at Wilbur. All of this in line with who Tommy is as a character and how events have changed him. This is a good characterization.

Wilbur

Wilbur has changed a lot since we've seen him last, both alive and dead. Since he's been alive, Wilbur has changed his tune from "I want to die" to "hell sucks, mate." What's particularly interesting is that this sentiment that he has from being alive carried for a long time into his limbo, as evidenced by his appearance in the season 2 finale on the bench. He wanted to "stay dead" at that point. Since we've seen him in limbo, he's gone from content in his situation and understanding why he's there and that he's there forever.

Now we have Revivedbur. Revivedbur is ecstatic to be alive again. He goes from numb to embracing feeling again. The fandom once thought that Revivedbur would be annoyed with or hateful towards Dream for bringing him back turned into joy and reverence. This is quite a drastic leap. Bad characterization.

But it isn't.

I have seen one clip from Ranboo's stream on 4/29 and that is Ranboo telling Philza that Wilbur is alive. In this bit, after mentioning that Wilbur has been in limbo for a perceived 13 and a half years, Phil says "13 years is a long time to be away... he almost certainly isn't the same person... people can change quite a lot in a single year, two years, three years, four years, even five years, Ranboo."

Wilbur has been gone for 13 years. He's been in the same place with no change other than Tommy for 13 fucking years. That's 13 years where we heard from him 2 times. We know virtually nothing about what those 13 years were like for him, but from what Wilbur has said, it was torture to him. He was stagnant, stuck in a fucking tube station for 13 years, unable to leave no matter how hard he tried.

We know so little about how his time in limbo changed him because it's such a long span of time with radio silence. I dare say this is fucking great characterization.

Ranboo

This is where I start having some issues, and this is where I have the least amount of context. From what I've seen, Ranboo is little miss angst who forgets things and is constantly on the verge of having a panic attack (hyperbole). From what I have surmised of his character in various contexts, serious and dramatic scenes and domestic ones, Ranboo really cares about the people around him and is scared of himself and his mind.

So why is it that he straight up just sneers at Tommy, saying "the hell did you do?"

I'm really just focusing on this because it just seems really off to me in the context of his character. Ranboo was in on this plan. It's pretty common knowledge that the only person with revive powers is Dream. Ranboo doesn't know everything that happened within the prison, sure, but why is he so quick to assume that Tommy was the root cause? Is it because he's been hanging out with the world's 2nd biggest Tommy hater, Niki (the character for clarification)? I honestly don't know where this jump-in assumption is coming from. Given what I understand of his character, this line and the implications I'm getting are just a bit out of character. Feel free to explain why I'm wrong because I am not in this loop whatsoever.

Awesamdude

Sam is where I have the biggest issue. How does a man go from living on an isolated island in grief over a death he could've prevented if only he had been quicker, to yelling at that same formerly dead person that he was at fault for the death/revival of another person?

Now, one thing that is strengthened by this characterization is Sam's dedication to the rules. He has his strict protocol and he is not going to let that slip up for anything. He wants to keep Dream in prison and never let him out.

But I'm just having a hard time grappling with a man so quick to blame himself last time something like this happened being so quick to place blame on a child he, from what I've seen, had a good relationship with. It feels like I'm missing something here.

Yeah, Tommy broke into the prison, but why is Sam's first thought that Tommy was trying to break dream out? This harsh turn on Tommy just doesn't come across right to me.

Why Did This Happen?

I do think there could be a meta reason as to why these don't land right to me. These two characterizations are centered around Tommy. How people are reacting to Tommy's actions. Tommy and Dream are the head of the prison stuff right now. at least as far as I know. I'm not sure if Wilbur has come back on as a writer yet but last I heard it's still Tommy and Dream handling their shit. With the writers in mind, I wouldn't put it past them to decide to add more conflict with Tommy and other members of the SMP right now. The Egg is a bit busy with other things, Jack is just running the hotel, and the Syndicate doesn't really have any qualms with Tommy on any level that they would act on. It could be the writers trying to add conflict to the prison storyline by generating conflict between Tommy, Ranboo, and Sam with Wilbur being a fuckin wild card.

I don't know mate, I just wanted my thoughts out there and maybe be fucking pounded into the ground by people more knowledgeable than me.

Have a dialogue with me I'd love to debate. (All friendly debate please I don't feel like taking this too seriously it is Minecraft roleplay after all.)

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1990jeevas · 3 years

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I love it when people talk about things they're passionate about, tell me something cool!! Anything you want, just something you find interesting or want to talk about :D

hello anon my beloved, I am in a bad mood so you will be receiving a passionate, yet lowkey of pissy rant about why villainizing bakugou makes me wanna vomit and its NOT just because I'm a dumbass kinnie :)

tws: child abuse (emotional and physical), near death expierences, bullying, kidnapping, suffocation, lots of trauma in general tbh. if you've seen bnha then basically just keep all the general triggering plot stuff in mind incase i missed any warnings

also, note: I havent caught up on bnha in a minute, I'm at like the start of the war arc but I barely remember shit there tbh so like. probs missing new stuff. also bnha spoiler warnings lol

so, for starters, the homie bakugou has like,, a good handful of issues that come from his childhood that explain why he's an ass. he was always praised and never actually reprimanded for being a twat which led to him having a huge ego that ended up fucking him over majorly. this ego was something that his mother acknowledged him having, but literally didnt try to fix it with anything other than violence. see here:

like, instead of trying to help him, she hits and insults him, which is probably what led to his weird inferiority/superiority complex. being constantly told by others that you're outstanding and one day you'll be a top hero because you're rude and aggressive and then going home and being hit by your mother for those exact same behaviors is bound to fucking confuse a child.

so like, now that we've established that its definetly canon that his mother (parents? I think he said parents at some point but masaru doesn't seem like the type so 🤷) hits him though we don't know how much or how often (though if bakugou was as much of a little shit back then ((which as far as we've seen- he was)) then it was probably often), lets talk about how regardless of all that 1) hitting your kids as "discipline" not only doesn't work but is abusive lol like idc if it's spanking/popping them on the mouth for talking shit, slapping them across the face "on occasion", etc. shits not okay 2) hitting your kids!!!! does not work!!!!!!!! it is literally PROVEN not to work!!!!!!!! hitting a child who has done something wrong doesnt teach them to stop doing something it teaches them to be scared of you, which will cause the child to withdraw, removing part of their support system (assuming said abusive parents would even offer that up) and will most likely lead to them thinking they're a bad person, not that their actions were bad, which are two different things. so, ya know, that would clearly have an effect on a kid. like, as someone with a mother who reminds me all too much of mitsuki: I have acted like a complete shitbag and taken my anger out on people to feel better in the past because of the way my mother treated me. though it was nowhere near what bakugou did, I still know first fucking hand what a mother hitting and insulting her child will do, especially if they have no proper outlet for that (friends, a safe place to vent) which bakugou never fucking had.

theres also the fact that just talking to your kid the way mitsuki does (saying it's his fault he was kidnapped because he's weak, all while hitting him) is not??? okay?????? ive seen people arguing that this was just a joke in poor taste but like her son was KIDNAPPED and even if it was a "joke" there's literally NO WAY that would EVER?? BE FUNNY??????? she just sounds like the kind of parent who at the very least says shit without thinking that would traumatize bakugou (because being told right after being kidnapped it's your fucking fault by your mother is absolutely traumatizing) but it comes across as her being emotionally abusive.

mitsukis character as a whole comes across as a shitty mom who doesn't realize she's a shitty mom and thinks bakugou being an ass isn't at least partially her fault even though she's admitted to realizing he has always had an ego problem and doing nothing to fix it except for hitting and yelling which obviously did nothing but make him just as loud and violent as she is.

this is obviously not the entire reason why he's a dick but he was never properly taught that the shit he was doing wasn't okay and people not stopping it and/or praising him endlessly even tho he was a bully is basically the same as encouraging it, thank you very much.

moving on from that, let's talk about bakugous other traumas and how he naturally responds to them. hint: it's with either full blown panic or a fight response (verbal or physical, though usually physical. also sometimes it's the panic followed by the fight response.)

so far in bnha (keep in mind that I am not caught up, I've only read up to the beginning of the war arc and i barely remember those bits so) bakugou has...

nearly died via sludge villain (he was unable to move and was being suffocated to death- keep this in mind)

lost for the first time ever and against deku of all people (this nearly sent him into a full blown panic attack, likely because of that sexy little inferiority/superiority complex combo. think of this as like. gifted kid burnout lite. he has always been the best of the best and now suddenly he is being beaten by somebody who has always been weaker than him, which immediately makes him start thinking he was never actually that good, he's actually a fucking failure, a goddamn fraud)

won the sports festival by default (bakugou counts this as yet another failure because todoroki didnt try his best. had bakugou lost to todoroki full strength, he would've taken 2nd place with a bit of bitching, but he still wouldve taken it rather than refuse the medal as it would be a reminder that he failed. instead of accepting that like UA shouldve, the staff chained and muzzled him on live television and then had all might, his fucking idol, force the medal into his mouth. remember the sludge villain incident and how he couldnt move and was suffocating to death? yeah.)

been kidnapped because of the way he reacted to winning during the sports festival (he was aggressive and tried to refuse the medal because he felt he didnt deserve it and was then retraumatized by being chained up and muzzled. his "villainous attitude" was a fucking trauma response, do not tell me otherwise)

was then chained up once again by the LOV after being kidnapped,,, do we see the "retraumatize bkg" theme yet?

"ended all might" (he literally blames himself for all mights retirement because had he just not have been weak, all might wouldve had more time, right?)

my point with all of these is that bakugou has been severely traumatized and has then had his trauma responses (aggression, fight) used to further demonize him. not all people with trauma react the fucking same and the way the fandom just refuses to acknowledge anger as a valid form of trauma response is gross as hell.

moving away from that topic, bakugou has literally never had any actual friends, they all just used him and didn't care about him which absolutely will fuck up a kid, especially one who already has all that other shit going on. bakugou deadass never had a support system or people to help him grow as a person, let alone properly work through his fucking emotions so it's not surprising that he would take out his bullshit on the one person who tried to help him especially considering he saw dekus actions as him thinking he was weak. bakugou was raised to not seek help, he thought somebody strong shouldnt ever need it, so for somebody like deku (who bakugou percieved as weak and helpless already) to offer up help? deku must obviously think bakugou is even weaker than him, what other explanation could their possibly be!

speaking of which, there's his heaps of insecurities that he basically hid by being a twat and bullying others for most of his life. kid was so insecure he bullied deku for fucking years cause he thought deku looked down on him, thought he was better than him, etc. and that only got worse bc his idol then decided to take deku in, train him and even give him his quirk. there's probably some shit im missing but still he's got issues and always has had issues. that being said, he's actually improving and working them out now which is what makes him a really good, interesting character. it's also nice to see a character who is a dick without some tragic backstory (like his backstory is sad but its not the classic "my family was fucking slaughtered and i turned into a raging bitch who murders people" type shit) bc that rarely happens and it's like most assholes don't actually have a story like that they're just assholes lol

now lets talk improvement! lil bitch has been getting better since he got into UA and im so happy abt it!! he had a rough start what with deku suddenly having a quirk and all but like he is really improving now and it highkey shows that bakugou just mostly needed people who 1) didn't constantly praise him and actually criticized him instead 2) actually fucking punished him doing stupid shit and 3) some motherfucking friends

Since going to UA he's gotten actually feedback from teachers about his weaknesses and how to get stronger, he's lost against others, hes been told he has a shit attitude and is a dick, told he should be nicer and leave deku alone, etc etc. He hasn't gotten in trouble too much with teachers but others give him shit for what he does and aizawa has punished him too, while still acknowledging that bakugou is an amazing and dedicated student, something which no one else had done up til that point. and uh???? homie actually has friends who like,,, don't use him and also call him out when he's a dick. like specifically kirishima has done this shit and him and bakugous relationship is clearly very healthy and beneficial for the both of them. makes me feel all happy n shit, ya know

bottom line is: while it is absolutely valid to dislike or even hate bakugou because he is a massively flawed person who has been very cruel to others, villainizing him for the way he acts which in large part seems to be from a lack of guidance, a shitty mother and heavy amounts of trauma, is fucking awful. his actions cannot be fucking excused, he needs to apologize and continue to grow, but he is also a fucking teenager, who is just now being told that the way he acts is unacceptable by people who dont fucking abuse him (and I swear to god if any people who think mitsuki isnt abusive interact with this fucking post I will fullstop hardblock you, I do not fucking care) and actually treat him like a normal person instead of some prodigy child or someone who needs to be fixed.

people are free to debate my points or whatever bc I know some of this stuff is up to interpretation but like. dni if you're just here to say you hate bakugou for xyz reason or that he's irredeemable. also especially dni if you compare him to fucking endeavor yall bitches make me gag.

anyways thxs for the ask anon <33 sorry this is a kinda messy info dump lol

#shit self #asks #boku no hero academia #long post #bakugou katsuki #yes i am a bakugou kinnie shut the fuck up /lh #this is all /nm btw its just so much easier to make my long posts aggressive yk #this is just how i talk irl but Better Formatted #info dump #kinz #anti mitsuki #discourse #bangerz

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eveningstar1516 · 3 years

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Rise Of The Demon King ~ Chapter 3

Rise of the Demon King

Fic: Multi Chapter Paring: MC x Everyone (Mostly Lucifer) Type: Angst with a Happy Ending Total Word Count: 26,758 TW: Major Character Death, Reader gets stabbed with a sword through their chest so…, Abusive Parents, Past Child Abuse, Demon Hunters, Loss of Control Summary: You’ve done it. You’ve finally done it. You’ve managed to anger the demon king. Now you hold your head high as he hands down your sentence. AO3 Portal: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27065362

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Previously:

“It seems you 7 forgot that you don’t dictate what goes on here. You are but a guest to the Devildom and the Sins, my subjects. MAKE NO MISTAKE! I AM YOUR KING AND YOU LOT ARE NOTHING!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 3 - Things Never Seem To Go Y/N's Way Huh? (1404 words)

“It seems you 7 forgot that you don’t dictate what goes on here. You are but a guest to the Devildom and the Sins, my subjects. MAKE NO MISTAKE! I AM YOUR KING AND YOU LOT ARE NOTHING!” The brothers jumped in front of me to try and shield me from the king while Asmo and Barbatos tried to pull me back to get me out of the room. Diavolo jumped in front of the king trying to stop his father.

“Father stop! Please! There isn’t a need for this! Y/N is harmless to the Devildom and the Lords! They are the only human that accepted us for what we are, they even BOWED down to YOU and not because of your status but because they accepted you as their king! Can you not see that this is a step in the right direction and that everything you’re doing undoes all that we’ve worked towards?”

“What YOU’VE worked towards. I am not interested in inter-realm relationships. It seems I have been too lax with you boy. I will deal with you once this human has been eradicated.”

The king snapped his fingers and purple chains started to wrap themselves around me. I felt my energy leave my body like the chains were siphoning it. The last thing I saw before losing consciousness was Diavolo kneeling before his father and pleading for my life as the others in the room followed suit then, black.

Sometime Later…

I woke up to the feeling of a cold hard floor. Snapping awake I felt a sharp pain in my right foot. Looking down I realized that my ankle had been chained to the wall. I was put into a cell that looked to be somewhere underneath the palace. Taking some deep breaths I curled up into a ball reaching out trying to feel for the connection in my pacts only to feel an immense sharp pain in my brain.

“These cells are enchanted to nullify magic, pacts included.”

The king spoke while entering and I steeled myself as I stood with as much strength as I could muster while glaring at him as fiercely as I could.

“You have made quite the commotion for a mere mortal haven’t you?” He started looking at me with a sharp look in his eyes, a sickeningly sweet smile on his face as he continued.

“To think a mere mortal of a human was able to sway the hearts of my 9 most powerful and coldhearted demons, my son included, although he always had a soft spot for the weak. You should count yourself lucky human, my son, as well as the Lords, all pleaded for your life. I have to say, I was quite disgusted by their behaviour.” He snarled at me with the most hateful expression I’ve ever seen in a demon. I tried my hardest not to quiver in front of him as I locked my gaze on him. All that time spent with Lucifer paid off as I schooled my expression into the hardest one I could muster in these circumstances.

“You’re quite lucky to have this many demons care about you. Seeing as how my son had just gotten me back, I have decided to humour him and hold a public trial deciding your fate tomorrow. If I am going to make an example of how demons should be treating humans, I might as well make it public so that all of Devildom can see that you mortals will never be able to hold such power over us, wouldn’t you say?”

He asked his question with such a disturbing smile showing off his fangs trying to get a rise out of me. On the inside I was having a full-blown panic attack, on the outside, however, I just continued to stare at him, not dignifying him with a response.

“Ah well, I didn’t really expect you to answer that. Although, before we go through with this trial, you will have to dissolve your pacts and if you won’t I will dissolve them by force.”

At this, I burst out laughing. Tears came to my eyes as I grabbed my stomach trying to stay upright while I addressed the king between laughing breaths.

“Hahaha! You think dissolving my pacts is the way to go?! News flash! The pacts are the only reason the brothers haven’t attacked you or tried to break me out! They are the only thing keeping them in line, take that away and they will have nothing to anchor them. Diavolo may have pacted with Lucifer but we both know they would side together to get me out and even if Dia were to try to stop him, he would fight it with his brothers. You’d have a war on your hands.” Smirking, I looked to the so-called “king” to gauge his reaction. Growling dangerously low he replied.

“You think me afraid of Pride and his so-called “family?”

“No, no I don’t, but it would be very hard to fight a one-sided war especially with The Morningstar leading the charge with “your” 9 most powerful demons backing him.”

I turned around and sat on the makeshift bed folding my hands behind my head, I finished speaking with a genuine smile across my face.

“The pacts will be staying and I will make sure the brothers don’t interfere with the trial. Whether you like it or not, my pacts are the one thing keeping them at bay. I’ll see you again tomorrow at the trial?”

He growled and with a scoff turned on his heel and left me alone in my cell. I let out a breath I didn’t even know I was holding, breaking down as the gravity of the situation set in. He was either going to kill me or banish me and not allow any of them to come to see or stay in contact with me. Tears started forming in my eyes as I let them fall silently not having the energy to scream. I don’t know how long I was in there for but by the time someone came to drop off my “dinner” which really only consisted of a piece of bread and some water which I guess is ideal for a prisoner, my tears had completely dried, a rock hard emotionless expression on my face had made itself at home. Ironically, instead of praying to God to help me, I found myself thinking of Diavolo and my fellow demons, wishing I could see even just one of them. I thought about the desserts Barb and I never crossed off of our to-bake list. Poison Cherry Tarts were next on the list. The pranks Dia and I have yet to pull off. We were supposed to do a lyric prank on the boys. The places I have yet to nap with Belphie. We were going to build a treehouse with Beel and sleep in there. I thought about Asmo and his make up line and how he wouldn’t be able to ask me to help him test them out anymore. Satan's birthday is coming up. I have a memory book I made for him starting from the first day I met him in the council room. A picture and story for every day since I’ve known him. The number of games Levi and I have yet to play. He recently got an escape room game based on the House of Lamentation! The schemes I wouldn’t get to pull off with Mammon. We never even caught a picture of Lucifer caught off guard! My thoughts then drifted off to Lucifer. The firstborn Avatar of the Cardinal Sin of Pride. The Morningstar. My Morningstar. I thought about the late nights we would no longer have. The brief brushing of our fingers. The caresses that we would no longer share. I remembered how he was when I first arrived. He was cold, distant, he wouldn't really give me the time of day. Now we spend late nights together. He anchors me and I like to think that I do the same for him. How will he handle it when I’m gone? Not wanting to stay in my head any longer, I drift off into a dreamless slumber awaiting the day that will ultimately decide not only my fate, but the fate of the demons I’ve grown to call, family.

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kingexpl0sionmurder · 4 years

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An Accidental Series Of Fortunate Events - Kaminari Denki - Smut

Author: @kingexpl0sionmurder Rating: NSFW 18+ Pairing: Kaminari Denki / F!Reader Words: 6,000 Warnings: Swearing, unprotected sex in an uncomfortable place (aka a vehicle), Denki is an idiot, I make a thinly veiled jab at The Walking Dead cause fuck that show, I was inspired after watching Zombieland, Kirishima with dark hair because who has time to bleach and dye when there are zombies running around?

AN: Another collab piece for the BNHarem server! This month’s theme is Apocalypse, and I got a chance to try my hand at Denki this time around. I think it came out pretty good! Shout outs to my pals @unbreakablekiribaku and @420bakubaby for your encouragement, and to all my loves over in WAP, you know who you are! <3

Check out the rest of the pieces in this collab HERE My Masterlist Buy me a Ko-Fi? ------

Denki sighed, adjusting his backpack as he trudged along the highway. It had been months since the disease had ravaged the country, a plague that no one had foreseen taking the lives of nearly every person in Japan.

He assumed he couldn’t be the only survivor, but he’d yet to see anything that told him otherwise. He didn’t even really understand how he could still be among the living if he was being honest. Denki’s life had always seemed like an accidental series of fortunate events. He got by on sheer luck. He couldn’t help but feel like he wasn’t supposed to be here.

He had tried to search for his friends with the panic hit. The chaos, the recently deceased coming back to life and hungry for humans, the whole thing seemed like something out of a terrible movie or a graphic novel turned TV show that was way too long and drawn out. The only person he’d managed to get a hold of was Sero, and their call had been cut short when the towers had gone down. And that had happened right after the entire city had lost power.

Being a pro hero, he went out into the streets to try and help, attempting to get people to safety and fighting those...things? Zombies? It felt so surreal to even say, even though he had experienced it first hand, watched as the man he saw at the convenience store around the corner from his apartment every morning full-on sprinted at the lady who always walked her Shiba Inu down to the park on Saturdays and ripped her throat out with his teeth.

Shuddering at the memory, he weaved around an abandoned car in the road, peering cautiously into the front seat to make sure that no one was hiding inside and hungry for flesh.

He kept a mental list now of things he had to do, rules he’d made for himself to keep surviving. Double-checking his surroundings was one of them. So when he heard the sound of tires on pavement, the revving of an engine from somewhere behind him, he was prepared, quick to run behind a car that was resting on its side, pressing himself against the undercarriage and listening closely.

Unless the walking dead was able to drive, he finally had an answer as to whether or not he was the last one alive. The question was, was this person going to be a friend or foe?

He heard the engine start to quiet, the sound of the vehicle slowing just beyond where he hid, and braced himself, his first unclenching as lightning coursed along his palms. He chanced a glance over the side of the car when he heard the transmission shift into park, and the sound of the truck door creaking open. What he saw nearly took his breath away.

You were standing on the road, a sawed-off shotgun in hand, your hair tied back and away from your face. Your tattered tank top was streaked in dirt and dried blood, your legs in dark jeans that were tucked into black combat boots. You were beautiful, and you were staring right at him, the gun pointed in his direction.

He ducked back down, his breathing ragged as he tried to figure out what to do now. Did he attack? Did he try to talk to you?

“Hey, Blondie! You gonna hide back there or come out and face me?”

He went rigid, eyes wide. Time to turn on the old Denki charm. He stood, breathing deeply and schooling his features, turning to face you. “Hey, sweet cheeks, what brings you to a place like this?”

You blinked at him, your mouth in a straight line, and he felt his confidence waver. “What does it look like? Just trying to survive. Are you an idiot or something?”

“Hey, no reason to be so harsh, babe. I’m just doing the same as you.” He cocked his hip out and rested his hand on it, shooting you a wink. “I was beginning to think I was alone out here.”

Your eyes drifted away from him and scanned the road, the sound of birds in the distance the only other sign of life. “You’re alone?”

“Course I am. What about you?” He didn’t dare move, trying to keep from staring down the barrel pointed at him. You were just a few feet away, and one pull on the trigger would blow him to pieces.

“There are others. I’m just on a supply run.” You were studying him, looking thoughtful. “Why aren’t you armed?”

He raised a hand, letting the electricity flow down his arm so you could see. “I’m always armed, angel.”

Rolling your eyes, you nodded. “Nice quirk.” You looked impressed, and he couldn’t help but preen a little. Your gun lowered slightly and he felt himself start to relax. “You got a name, blonde?”

“You can call me Kaminari.” He let his hand fall, chancing a step forward. “I don’t mean any harm. Like you said, I’m just trying not to die. Could you maybe put the gun down?”

“Nervous?” Smirking, you lowered the weapon, and he heaved a sigh of relief. “Alright, Kaminari. Why don’t you come with me? You hungry?”

“Starving.” He slumped a bit, finally feeling like you weren’t going to kill him. “I had some jerky for breakfast this morning but it wasn’t great.”

“Tch.” God, you sounded like Bakugou when you made that noise, and it made him miss his explosive friend. “I’ll bring you back to meet the others. If they decide they like you, maybe you could stay with us. We might be able to use that quirk of yours.” You turned back towards the truck you’d arrived in, making to get inside. “No promises, though.”

Denki hesitated for half a second. What if the others you were with didn’t like him? He knew he could be a pain in the ass sometimes. Ultimately he decided to go with you. If your group didn’t like him he could just continue on by himself.

Hurrying around the car, he shrugged off his backpack, opening the door and sliding into the passenger seat beside you. “Hey, you didn’t tell me your name, doll.”

He watched as you settled into the seat, pulling the seat belt across your chest and buckling it. Your eyes met his and you shot him a smile that made his chest tight. “It’s Y/N.”

The car ride back was mostly silent. He was itching to ask you things, the chatterbox in him just wanting to burst forth and talk at you for hours. It had been difficult, being alone, since he’d always been such a social butterfly. When all you had to talk to was yourself for months on end, things could get kind of boring.

However, he didn’t want to scare you off or make you think he was some kind of weirdo, so he stayed mostly silent. He did ask where you were from originally, and about the others you were with, but your answers were short and lacking in detail, and he didn’t want to pry.

“Didn’t you say you were on a supply run?” His eyes were trained on the road ahead, keeping a lookout for the lumbering undead.

“Yeah, I hit up a drug store in the next town over.” You gestured to the back seat. “Medicine and bandages, bottled water, and some canned food. We only take what we need at the moment. We never know how long we’re going to be in one place, so we try to keep it light.”

“That makes sense.” From what he gathered, your group wasn’t large. There were only about 5 of you, so he assumed it was easier for you not to have a large number of things to carry around with you.

“Yeah, we’ve found a house in an abandoned neighborhood to stay in for now. We spent a few days combing through the houses in it, and it looks like the area has been empty for a while.” Your fingers tapped on the steering wheel as you turned the car and took an exit ramp off the highway. “I’m kind of hoping we can stay for a while. It’s nice to sleep on a mattress, and it’s got running water.”

“Oh man, a shower sounds so freaking nice.” Leaning back against the seat, he glanced over at you. “It’s hard when you’re on your own, there’s no one to watch your back.” He shivered when he pictured trying to shower and being attacked by a zombie while he was butt ass naked. “Even going to the bathroom is a risk.”

Snorting, you made a right turn and scrunched your nose. “Imagine dying with your pants around your ankles?”

“My literal worst nightmare.” You both burst into a fit of giggles, and Denki felt the awkward tension in the car ease a bit.

You started pointing out landmarks and abandoned stores. “We’re thinking this was one of the first neighborhoods to evacuate when things got bad. The houses are upscale, so we think they might have been tipped off early. Kind of sucks that the rest of us weren’t prepared at all compared to them.”

Nodding, Denki agreed. “It was absolute chaos in Musutafu. I was on the streets trying to help and just watching people rip each other apart. I’ve never seen anything more terrifying in my life.”

“You’re from Musutafu? So are a few of the people in my group.”

Denki watched out the window as you turned down a side road, the remains of a gated communities’ security booth on your left. The door looked like it had been blown off its hinges, and the windows all around it had been smashed. “Did you check the whole neighborhood?”

“Yeah, we started at one end and searched through all the houses. We were mostly looking for survivors, but we didn’t find anyone.”

You followed the main road as he gazed at the abandoned mini-mansions. Tall grass swayed on every lawn, an obvious tell that it had been some time since there had been any landscaping done. Denki tried to picture what this neighborhood would have looked like before disaster struck, picturesque, with luxury cars in the driveways and well-manicured lawns, kids playing in the street, housewives lounging by their in-ground pools. It was jarring to think it would probably never look that way again.

You pulled the truck into the driveway of a large house at the end of the road, stopping in front of a closed gate. The tall fence connected to it wrapped around the property as far as he could see, and he could just make out a low man-made rock wall just beyond it, like someone had busted up giant slabs of concrete and stacked them all the way around, just to reinforce the fence. He had a feeling that was something that your group had constructed.

“Before we go in, I just want you to know, our self-proclaimed leader can be kind of a dickhead.” You moved to take off your seat belt and shot him a look. “He’s smart as fuck though and he helps protect us, so he’s not all bad. Just keep your head down and don’t provoke him and you’ll be fine.”

“Sounds like someone I used to know. I can handle it, don’t worry.” He cracked his knuckles and grinned at you. “I’m a pro at dealing with dudes like that.”

Eyes rolling, you shook your head. “It’s your funeral.” You got out of the truck and moved to the fence, using a key from your back pocket on the padlock keeping it shut. Denki unbuckled his seat belt and slid into the driver’s seat, watching as you pushed on the gate and walked it forward, clearing the way. Denki drove the truck forward far enough so that you could close the lock the gate behind you. He made to move back over but was surprised when you climbed into the passenger seat. “Just keep going up, we’ll park in the garage.”

He followed your instructions, creeping up the driveway and towards the house, his foot pressing on the break when he noticed the pathway to the garage was blocked.

“Or not.” You sighed. “Just stop here.”

Denki put the truck in park, eyebrows furrowed as he took in the scene before him. There was a car up on cinder blocks, blocking the entrance to the garage. Someone was lying underneath it, their jean-clad legs and black boots the only part of them he could see. He shut the car off and handed you the keys, sliding out of the car when you did.

“E, you’re blocking my spot.” You called, rounding the truck. “Come help me with this stuff and meet the new guy I found.”

“Sorry, Y/N. I’m trying to get this thing to run for us. I didn’t expect to still be working on it when you got back but I’m having trouble.” That voice was familiar, and Denki’s lungs seized in his chest. “Wait, did you say new guy?”

He watched as the man shuffled himself from under the car and stood, his hair long and dark, with red at the tips. Red eyes, pointy teeth. Eijirou Kirishima.

“Kiri?” Pain bloomed through his chest like his heart had stopped beating. He never thought he’d see any of his friends ever again, but here he was, one of his best bros in the entire world.

Kirishima looked up at him, a million emotions flitting across his face before it split into the blinding smile he was used to seeing on his friend’s face. “Denki?”

Denki launched himself at his friend, throwing his arms around him, relief flooding through his entire body. Kirishima picked him up, laughing and hugging him tightly. “Holy shit.” They stayed that way longer than necessary, swaying back and forth and mumbling into each other’s shoulders.

“Thought you were dead, dude. What the fuck?” Red Riot finally put him down, rubbing at his eyes and sniffling,

“I’m a bad bitch, they can’t kill me.” Chuckling wetly, he slapped his friend on the shoulder. “What, you give up on the box dye now that the world is ending?”

“I missed you, dude.” Kiri sighed, choosing to ignore the jab and reaching up to muss Denki’s hair.

“So...do you guys know each other?” Your voice broke them from their reunion.

He had almost forgotten you were standing there. Kiri seemed to be in the same boat. “Oh, yeah. Sorry, Y/N. We’ve known each other since we were 15. Went to UA together.”

“Does that mean-” You started, but Kirishima cut you off.

“Oh my god.” He turned to look at Denki and grinned, cupping his hands around his mouth and shouting towards the house. “HEY, SERO?!”

Denki knew he was going to cry for real now. His best friend was alive. The one person that he had been wishing to see this entire time was here, and Denki was going to get to see him again, all thanks to you. If he hadn’t run into you on the highway, this never would have happened. Swallowing thickly, trying to keep his emotions in check, he blinked up at Kirishima. “Sero is here?”

“Bakugou and Mina, too.” His formally red-haired friend turned towards the front door and threw an arm around Denki’s shoulders as they waited for the rest of the group to arrive. “The Bakusquad is back together.”

It had been so long since Denki had felt this relaxed. He’d showered and had a hot meal, and now he was lounging on a couch pressed up against Hanta Sero, his best friend. Kirishima and Bakugou were on the opposite couch, leaning against each other. Even though Bakugou had his normal stoic expression on his face, Denki knew he was happy.

Mina was at his feet, chattering on and telling you about UA, and how Denki used to go stupid when he used his quirk too much. Her story came complete with her shooting a thumbs up, crossing her eyes and crying WHEEEEYYY, which had Sero and Kirishima in tears of laughter. Bakugou even cracked a smile, and Denki kind of wanted the floor to swallow him up.

“Hey, do you need to tell her that, Mina?” He kicked his foot out, toes connecting with her back.

“Aw, are you embarrassed, Kami?” Teasing him, she poked his shin, before turning her gaze back to you. “Last I remember, our little Chargebolt here was in the top 20, so I’d say he’s got a handle on his quirk now.”

Denki felt his ears get hot, and he chanced a glance over at you, blushing even harder when you smiled at him. He’d only known you for a few hours and he was already smitten. Sure, it had been a while since he’d had any human contact, and it was hard to jerk it when you were fearing for your life at every moment. So it was only natural that he wanted to catch the attention of the prettiest girl he’d laid eyes on in months, right?

Sero pulled him up not long after, pushing him from the room and out the back sliding door. He leaned against the railing on the wooden patio, his neck craned so he could look up at the sky, and Denki settled beside him, mirroring his posture.

“I can’t believe we found you, man.”

Huffing a breath, Denki nodded. “Yeah, I know. I thought everyone I knew was dead. When we got cut off, I went out to help and figured I’d run into you, but shit was so crazy and I just...I don’t know. I wasn’t ready for that, dude. I became a hero to help people, not kill zombies. I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that I had to take their lives, even though it was clear that their humanity was gone, you know?”

Humming, Sero bumped their shoulders. “I get you. It’s fine. We all had to wrestle with that. It was hard for all of us.” Sighing, he gripped the railing and hoisted himself up to sit on it, swinging his feet. “The four of us were together, so we decided to stick that way and headed out of the city. We tried to find you, and I was looking for Shinsou too but, we didn’t want to stick around too long.”

A comfortable silence washed over the two of them before Sero continued.

“We found Y/N not long after that, holed up in a convenience store, wielding a shotgun like a champ. She’s badass.” Sero let out a low whistle. “Man, she gave Bakugou the business as soon as he opened his mouth to snark at her. I’ve never seen him shut up so fast. Even Kiri can’t get him to be quiet like that. That’s when we decided to join up with her.”

Denki snorted a laugh, leaning back on his elbows and looking at his friend. “She pointed that thing straight at me and I panicked and called her like 6 different pet names.”

“You’re lucky you’re alive, Kami. She must like you.”

It had been two weeks since Denki had met you on that deserted highway, and you’d reunited him with his friends. Bakugou had been talking about moving on for a few days, but the rest of the group seemed to be comfortable and happy in the house, so he hadn’t been pressing the issue much.

There hadn’t been one attack since Denki had arrived, and from what Mina had told him, they’d only seen a few of the undead since they’d found the place, so no one seemed to be too bothered by it. It still left him feeling uneasy, so used to having to be on alert at all times.

That was the least of his worries when he got to spend time with you, however.

He’d become your official partner when you went on your supply runs, under the guise of keeping you company in the truck when you ventured out into the world. He really just wanted to spend time with you and get to know you better. You had opened up to him more once you realized he was trustworthy, his friendship with the rest of the group enough to prove that to you.

The crush that he had developed on you that first day just seemed to grow more as time went on. He was in too deep, and he knew it, but he couldn’t stop himself. In any normal circumstances, you would be completely out of his league, so he knew he had to take this opportunity while it was in front of him.

He really did like you, situation aside. If he wasn’t constantly holed up with you in that house, or that truck, watching your back as you raided abandoned pharmacies and big-box stores for food and clothing and medicine, spending most of his waking moments in your company, he still would have grown fond of you in the way he had. It might have taken longer, but when every day could possibly be your last, there was no reason to pussyfoot around.

Unless your name was Denki Kaminari and you were a goddamn coward.

He was tired of hearing Mina and Sero complain that he was being a pussy, and that he should just make a move. He knew they were right, but there was this little voice in the back of his head that kept repeating the “what if’s”. What if you didn’t like him and you left the group because things got too weird? What if you did like him and he got nervous and fucked shit up? He needed to get out of his own head and just...do something.

He didn’t expect that you were going to beat him to it.

“So,” you said, one hand on the steering wheel and your other elbow leaning against the door as you drove, the window cracked enough to let the breeze blow your hair around. “Are you ever going to kiss me, or are we just going to play this waiting game forever?”

Denki choked on his own spit, sputtering and coughing. “I’m sorry, what?”

Shaking your head, you paused, and he assumed you were waiting for him to stop wheezing. “I mean, am I reading this wrong? You’re into me, right?”

Pushing his hair back from his forehead (which you had generously cut for him the day before), he chanced a glance over at you, steeling himself. ‘Well, yeah, ever since you pointed a gun at me and almost made me wet myself.”

You snorted, rolling your eyes. “Don’t be a wuss, Denki.”

“I love it when you insult me, baby.” Wiggling his eyebrows, he licked his lips. “So, what? You’ve been waiting for me?”

“Well, yeah. I mean, I didn’t want things to be weird, but I knew I couldn’t be wrong. I see the way you look at me when you think I’m not paying attention.” Biting your lip, you turned to look at him for a moment. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since you shot me finger guns and called me babe.”

Rubbing at the back of his neck nervously, he hummed. “Most of the time that scares women away. Are you sure there’s nothing wrong with you?”

“We’re all a little crazy, I guess. I think that’s why we’ve survived this long.” Your smile was contagious, and he couldn’t help but grin back, his arm moving across the center console, his hand open and palm up.

You adjusted your grip on the wheel to the other hand, reaching out with your right and letting your fingers slot between his. He squeezed your hand, his eyes fixed out the windshield as you took the familiar highway back towards the house.

The ride back was comfortably silent, your fingers intertwined the whole way. Denki’s heart was pounding against his ribcage as he tried to think of what to do or say next. You, however, had other ideas.

You turned onto the main road that led into the once gated community. He furrowed his brows, confused when you make a left down an unfamiliar street. The houses here were just as abandoned, all of their front doors marked with a spray painted red x.

“We marked them after we went through the houses, so we would remember where we’d already checked. It took us about a week to get through the entire neighborhood.” You explained, somehow knowing what he was thinking.

The road ended in a cul-de-sac, and you pulled the truck around in a circle until it was facing the exit, letting go of his hand so you could shift it into park and turn off the engine. He watched as you unbuckled your seat belt and shifted the seat back away from the steering wheel, his lungs seizing as you climbed over the center console and into his lap.

“Not that I’m complaining, but-” He hands moved to grip your waist and keep you steady as your straddled him, your knees on either side of his hips.

“I’m going to get my kiss, and I’m not going to do it in that house with the rest of those idiots around.” Your hand moved to his hip, fingers pressing the release on his seat belt. He let go of you long enough to pull the offending nylon belt off of him, the sound of the metal slapping against the door as it sprung back into place nearly startling him out of his skin.

“Yes ma’am.” Swallowing thickly, he pushed a piece of your hair away from your face and tucked it behind your ear.

The next few moments were in slow motion, eyes fluttering shut, and chests pressing together as you moved closer. His palm slid to cup the side of your neck, your head tilting slightly as your lips finally met.

It took Denki every ounce of control he had not to let his quirk discharge when he finally got to taste your lips. It was everything he’d been hoping for and more. You tasted like the Dr.Pepper you’d gotten when you’d stopped at the pharmacy, and he could smell the scent of your shampoo now that he was close enough. He was addicted almost instantly.

Your lips were soft and pillowy, and he pressed you closer, wanting more. The feel of your hands on his shoulders, nails raking down the front of his t-shirt, and the quiet moan that left you when his right hand squeezed your hip was almost his undoing, but he held on. He would take this at whatever pace you wanted. You were in control.

You pulled away, gasping for air, your nose brushing against his and breath mingling. “You okay?” It was probably a stupid question, but he had to ask. If you felt anything like he did, then you were doing just fine.

“Mmm.” His sentiments exactly. Your tongue darted out to wet your lips, a smile gracing them. “I kind of want more. Is it too soon? Maybe.”

“Well,” his voice dropped to a whisper. “I’ve been telling myself for weeks that we could all die tomorrow, and that I shouldn’t be scared and just go for it, so if that’s what you need to hear…”

“Yep, that’s what I needed.” Blinking at him and biting your lip, your hips ground down against his, the sound of his groan filling the truck. “Fuck it, right? You only live once, and all that shit.”

“Fuck, yes. Bless up, Drake.” He let his hands dip under the hem of your t-shirt, the calloused pads of his fingers sliding over your soft skin.

You sat back and ripped your shirt over your head so suddenly he wasn’t prepared for the movement, and he grabbed your waist again to steady you. “I’ve waited too damn long, Denki. Please, I need you, okay?”

Nodding, he swallowed down his nerves, wanting to show you how much he needed you, too. “You got it, princess. Whatever you want.”

“Shirt off. Pants, too.”

As hot as the moment was, the next few minutes were filled with a lot of giggling and awkward movements as you both tried to undress in the passenger seat of the truck. Denki had the advantage because he was still sitting in the seat, and he just needed to pull his pants and boxers down around his thighs.

You, on the other hand, had your ass pressed against the windshield as you pulled off your boots and tried to tug your skinny jeans down your legs. He tried to help as best he could, keeping you upright and tugging on the denim one-handed until you were able to step out of them. Black lace panties followed, and then you were back on his lap, your mouth pressed to his as your hand wrapped around his aching cock.

Breathless and still laughing, he moaned as your tongues battled for dominance, his hands roaming up and down your sides as you tugged on his hair. Warm fingers moved between the apex of your thighs, dipping through your folds, causing you to break the kiss, throwing your head back. Denki took the opportunity to mouth at your neck, teeth grazing along your skin, biting and sucking marks into your flesh. He inserted one finger inside of you, groaning as your body squeezed around the digit. You were warm and so wet, and he imagined what it would feel like, your muscles clenching down around his cock when he was buried inside of you.

He timed the thrusting of his fingers with the slow drag of your hand around his cock, your moans filling his ears as you rocked back against his hand. He inserted a second finger, scissoring them and stretching you out, taking his time to prepare you. He wanted this to be good, but with the way you felt around him, the way your body felt pressed against him, and the noises you were making, he wasn’t sure how long he was going to last.

Thumb rubbing against your clit, he added a third finger, the lewd squelching noises coming from your cunt enough to make his eyes roll back. You were chanting his name in his ear, your forehead pressed against his shoulder as your body rolled against him, your strokes losing momentum. He couldn’t wait any longer.

Pulling his hand from you slowly, he lifted you to sit back a little, adjusting himself and guiding you back towards him. You raised up on your knees, hands on his shoulders to steady yourself, cheeks flushed and lips swollen from biting down on them. You looked so beautiful, and he thanked whoever it was that put him right here in this moment with you.

You smiled at him, and he heard your shaky intake of breath as you lined yourself up and sunk down on his cock. You moaned in tandem, your nails biting into his skin as your grip tightened, hips stilling as he bottomed out inside of you. Denki was grateful for the cracked windows because the breeze that blew through the car felt nice against his burning skin, the beads of sweat dripping down his temple turning cold, and making him shiver.

The realization that even though the windows were cracked open, there was no one around to hear the two of you. Grinning, he thought of all the ways he could make you scream once you were ready for him to move, and he couldn’t wait to hear you cry out his name.

You didn’t keep him waiting long, your cunt squeezing around him was all the indication he needed to start moving. Holding onto your hips tightly, he bucked up into you, reveling in the way you moaned, his toes curling as your hips ground down in sync with his.

Your body welcomed him in with little resistance, gripping his cock, the warm and wet slide as he plunged in and out of you making him dizzy. He focused his attention on unclasping your bra with one hand, pulling it down your arms and letting your breasts spill free from their confines, his head ducking down and his mouth immediately latching onto your hardened nipple.

Your moaning became louder, pussy clenching around him like a vice, unintelligible babbles spilling from your lips as he sucked, teeth grazing the hardened bud, his other hand massaging your other breast.

“Denki, Denki...please. Fuck, I need to come, please.”

Grunting in response, he let your nipple go with a pop, back straightening as he sat up. His fingers brushed along your cheek, turning you to face him properly, his thumb pulling on your bottom lip. “Need to come already, Y/N?”

“Yes, fuck, feels so good, Denki. Please.” Your tongue darted out to lick the pad of his thumb and he shivered again. He could feel the blood in his body traveling south, the wrecked look on your face as you bucked down against him driving him to the edge.

He used his now spit slicked thumb to rub against your clit in tight circles as he slammed into you, teeth nipping on your earlobe as he rasped in your ear. “God, fuck, come for me Y/N. Come on my cock, baby.”

Later on, he would tease you and tell you that even though you were a few blocks away, he wouldn’t be surprised if the rest of your group didn’t hear the noise you made when you reached your end. Your entire body locked up, trembling violently, the cry of his name that left your lips throwing him over the edge as well. He buried his face in your shoulder, his arms wrapping around you as his cock twitched, filling you with thick ropes of cum. It was so much that he felt it leaking out of you as you slumped together to catch your breath, even though he was still inside you.

After a while you sat back a little, peering at him with your face still flushed, tears clinging to your lashes.

“You alright?” He brushed the wetness away with his thumb, biting his lip as he gazed at you fondly.

Nodding, you pushed your hair back from your face, a small smile on your lips. “I’m great. That was perfect. God, why did you wait so long, Denki?”

Rolling his eyes, he leaned forward to kiss you softly. “Good things come to those who wait and all that, you know?”

“Okay, but you were just scared I’d reject you, weren’t you?” You pinched his arm playfully, giggling at him when he winced and rubbed at the red mark you’d left.

“Maybe, but it was worth the wait, wasn’t it?”

“You could say that.” Reaching up to pat down his mussed up hair, you fixed him with a serious look. “At least if I die tomorrow, I’ll know I was given the best dicking down I’ve ever received, and that it was from a top 20 pro hero to boot.”

“You just want me for my hero status, babe. Admit it.” He grinned, tickling your side.

“You caught me, Chargebolt. Now, let’s get cleaned up and get back before Bakugou comes looking for us and finds out we fucked in here. He’s going to be so pissed.”

“Let him be pissed.” Denki wrapped his arms around you and pulled you back to him, his lips finding yours again.

And for a few moments, he forgot that the world was ending and that the two of you could be ripped apart in seconds by hungry flesh-eating zombies

You were another accidental fortunate event that he’d stumbled into, and if that’s all that his life was meant to be full of, well, he didn’t mind it at all.

#kaminari denki #kaminari denki x reader #bnha x reader #bnharem collab #kaminari denki smut #mha x reader #mha smut #mha #bnha smut #bnha #kingexpl0sionmurder writes #denki kaminari #denki kaminari x reader #denki kaminari smut

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meganwritesfanfics · 3 years

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Fresh Bruises (Josh Lyman x Reader) Part 3

Warning this story contains mentions of Domestic Abuse

It was another half an hour to almost an hour before Abby reappeared. Donna had fallen asleep her head resting on Josh’s shoulder. He knew he should be tired, he should be exhausted, it was 3 in the morning, and he had only gotten maybe an hour of sleep the night before. But he couldn’t sleep, he barely blinked because all he could see was Y/N lying motionless in his arms.

“Josh,” Abby started when suddenly a dozen secret service agents came into the waiting area. The staff knew what to do as they quickly ushered everyone in the room to a different waiting room, the commotion waking Donna.

After the room had been secured President Bartlett and Leo walked in, and Josh quickly rose to his feet.

“Sir you didn’t have to come,” He started but Bartlett just pulled him into his embrace.

“Nonsense Josh, have you heard anything?”

“The surgery went well.” Abby said and Bartlett quickly patted Josh on the shoulder with a smile on his face.

“But,” Josh said noticing that Abby’s demeanor wasn’t a happy one.

“But, her head injury was worse than they had originally thought.” Abby said and Josh sat back down looking up at her as a child would look up at a parent. “She’s in a coma Josh.”

Josh just stared at Abby, mouth agape.

“Oh Josh,” Donna said her voice cracking hard as she wrapped her arms around him, trying her best not to cry.

“What are our options, are their specialists we can see what…” Jed started as he and Abby walked down to talk.

Josh wasn’t sure when Leo sat down next to him, but the next thing he knew Leo was grasping his hand tightly. He didn’t say anything, didn’t try to tell Josh everything was going to be ok. He just sat with him, letting Josh know he was there.

More time passed and Josh hadn’t spoken, hadn’t moved, hadn’t cried since Abby told him the news.

“Josh,” A voice spoke softly and he turned to see Leo still sitting next to him, but now he had a cup of coffee in his hands, Josh noticed there was another cup sitting on the table next to him. “Abby said she doesn’t think there is going to be anymore news for a while, why don’t we take you home so you can shower.”

“No, I have to stay, Y/N might…” Josh wanted to say wake up, but he couldn’t bring himself to because he still hadn’t fully processed everything that was happening.

“Abby is going to stay with Donna, they will be here when we get back, but Josh I think you would feel much better after a shower and a change of clothes.” Leo insisted

For the first time since they had gotten to the hospital, Josh finally looked down at himself. He was covered in blood, his white shirt was stained red and his shaking hands were caked with Y/N’s blood.

Before he even had a chance to say anything else, Leo was pulling him to his feet and ushering him out of the hospital.

Neither of the men tried to speak as they made their way to Leo’s car nore did they speak on the drive to Josh’s apartment.

Josh stayed staring at his hands trying to get them to stop shaking. His breathing was erratic and he was trying not to have a full blown panic attack, but it was incredibly difficult as he sat with the blood from the love of his life covering him.

“Josh,” Leo said as he looked over at him noticing the sound of his breathing. “Josh, you need to breath.”

“What if she doesn’t wake Leo, she is my whole world. I can’t…”

“Don’t think like that Josh, Dr. Bartlett is making sure that we get every specialist in the country on the case. Y/N is going to have nothing but the best care, Jed has insisted on it.”

“The President can’t…” Josh started.

“Josh, you are family, he’s going to do whatever he can to help you.”

The young man couldn’t help but get choked up hearing this. He had always considered the staff of the rest wing and the President to be his family. They had all been through highs and lows together, but actually hearing the word family come out of the Chief of Staffs mouth, really solidified everything.

By the time they had reached the apartment Josh had calmed down. He felt like for the first time that whole evening/morning he could breath.

The two men made their way into the apartment. Josh quickly rushed around picking up the papers and boxes that littered the apartment. He couldn’t remember the last time Leo had been to his place, or if he ever had, but he didn’t want him to see how terribly disorganized he was.

“Josh, I have seen your office, I expected your house to look much worse, Y/N must be a good influence on you.” Leo laughed causing Josh to stop looking back with a smile on his face. “Now go shower and get changed.”

Josh started his way towards the bathroom, but as he passed each room his mind began to flood of the memories he and Y/N had there.

It was 2 am by the time Josh had finally gotten home from work, and instead of going to bed, he immediately made his way to the couch pulling out the files he had brought home, to read over them before he had meetings the next day. He probably had gotten through 10 pages before he was passed out on the couch.

“Josh,” He heard someone whisper but he didn’t move he just kept his eyes closed, his hands barely hanging onto the files. Someone sighed as they reached down to grab the files out of his hands, and then he felt a blanket be placed over him.

In an instant he opened his eyes to see Y/N standing above him and he smiled as he grabbed her waist pulling her on top of him causing her to squeal.

“Why didn’t you come up to bed.” She said as she snuggled into his chest as he wrapped his arms tightly around her.

“I had some stuff I need to finish before my meetings tomorrow.” He yawned kissing the top of her head.

“You know that if you try to read those files this late that you are just going to fall asleep. You always do.” She giggled.

“And you are always there to tuck me in. Maybe that's the real reason I do it.”

“You are quite a frustrating man Joshua Lyman.”

“But you love me none the less.”

“Oh I do love you, I love you so much.” Y/N said looking into his eyes with such love that Josh thought he might cry.

“I love you too Y/N, more than I ever thought possible.” Josh said kissing her.

The two spent the night on the couch, and although he woke up sore, Josh still credited it as one of the best nights of his life.

Josh couldn’t hold back his tears as he continued past the kitchen

“You are not the only one with a career Josh!” Y/N screamed as she turned back to look at the food she had cooking on the stove.

“I’m not saying you don’t I’m just saying…”

“You are just saying that your career should always come first and that I should drop every single thing that I am doing to support you in your career.” Y/N hissed as she aggressively turned the stone off, turning back to look at him.

“Well yes since my career actually m…” He started but his eyes went wide when he realized what he was about to say.

“Because your career actually matters, is that what you were going to say Josh,” Y/N said, the anger completely gone from her voice. “Go ahead and eat. I'm not hungry anymore.” She said as she stormed upstairs.

“Shit,” Josh thought as he made his way after her.

As he cautiously made his way towards their bedroom, he could hear the sound of Y/N crying and he quickly walked in.

“Y/N,” He started and that’s when he saw her packing. “What are you doing.”

“I’m going to go stay with Ainsley,” She sniffed wiping the tears from her eyes.

“You would rather stay with a republican than with me,” Josh teased but Y/N just gave him a devastated look. “Y/N I’m sorry I didn’t mean what I said.”

“My job matters Josh, I know its not the life altering decisions like you make but to those kids, the ones whom I am their only voice during a time that is extremely traumatic for them, it matters.” Y/N said her voice cracking hard,

Josh quickly rushed to her side putting his hands on her face. “I know that honey, I do. I was just upset I really didn’t mean it. Your job absolutely matters. I am constantly in awe of what you do and how you help people. I brag about your job to everyone. My mother when she calls she asks how your job is going long before she even asks about me.”

Y/N laughed as she wiped her tears away.

“I was just upset because I really wanted you to come to the gala with me. I feel a lot more confident when I have you next to me.”

“Josh, you were plenty confident when I met you.” Y/N said as she back away turning back as she started to unpack the suitcase.

“It was a nice little act, but in realty, I feel my most confident and strongest, when you are by my side holding my hand, because I know if I have you I can face anything.” Josh said as he wrapped his arms around her waist burying his face in the crook of her neck.

“For how often you are an ass, you really know how to make up for it.” Y/N sighed as she turned around kissing him softly as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

“I’ve learned to admit when I’m wrong. Because I would rather grovel for your forgiveness than lose you.” He said seriously.

Y/N smiled as she ran her fingers through his hair.

“You won’t ever lose me Josh.”

By the time Josh made it into their bedroom he was a sobbing mess. Every room in the house gave him flashes of the beautiful memories he had with Y/N, and he felt like everything was slipping away.

Josh slowly rolled over, for the first time in a long time he had actually slept well. And he knew exactly what the reason was. As he opened his eyes he smiled looking at the beautiful girl laying next to him asleep.

Last night was the first night Y/N and Josh had spent together. And as Josh took in the sight of her snuggled up next to him, her beautiful Y/H/C against her Y/S/C, he realized that he was in love with her.

“You are staring, Joshua.” Y/N smiled as she opened her eyes smiling at him.

“It’s hard not to stare, you are so beautiful Y/N.” Josh said as he leaned forward kissing her.

“You are just saying that because I am lying naked in bed with you.” She laughed.

“You could be wearing 30 layers of clothes and I would still think you are the most beautiful woman in the world.”

Y/N kissed Josh again as she pulled him closer.

“I mean I’m not saying that you being naked in bed with me is a bad thing by any means.” Josh laughed as he flipped over so he was on top as he kissed Y/N passionately.

He kissed her for a while before the two broke apart and Josh stared down at her. She looked up eyes filled with curiosity.

“What’s wrong Josh,” Y/N smiled.

“I love you.” Josh said. “I love you Y/N.”

Y/N stared at Josh for a moment eyes wide. “I love you too Josh.”

As Josh got in the shower and he watched as Y/N’s blood dripped off of him and down the drain, he let out a devastated scream as he pounded his fists against the tile.

#josh lyman #josh lyman x reader #west wing #fanfiction #imagine

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emeto-things · 2 years

Text

Trying to calm down from a full blown panic attack. I felt a bit n*, but n* comes and goes sometimes so I was trying not to stress it. I put on my pressure point bands. I felt like I needed to use the bathroom, so I had a BM but it was a bit d*. Then I still felt n* and then I had that thought of, “Oh god, what if this is a SV*?” And panic ensued. The n* increased so I ran to take my Promethazine. I took off my pants because I was suddenly so hot and put an ice pack on my chest. I’m listening to the anti-n* frequency and smelling the essential oil inhaler. In a fit of rage and frustration, I started to cry. I can’t live like this forever. I absolutely dread the day my kids get a SV*. I don’t know how I’ll survive it. My husband suggested going back into therapy, maybe even into looking for ways to cure it like hypnosis or something. And I think that is a really good idea. I’m 13 weeks and 1 day so luckily the symptoms are starting to subside as I enter the 2nd trimester. I lower my Celexa dose to 5mg when I’m pregnant for the baby’s sake, but I may increase it back to 10mg. Because I can’t live like this. I’m having panic attacks at work. Mild, and short, but they’re there. I’ll have thoughts like, “I’m kinda n*, what if I get s* in front of a client?” And then I have to finish the transaction and try to pretend like I’m not absolutely fucking freaking out and struggling to swallow and breathe. In that moment I feel trapped, like I used to in high school in the classroom. An absolutely awful feeling. I almost want to take a day off tomorrow, having someone watch Autumn so I can just rest. And look into therapy options. I haven’t taken a sick day since September 2020. And that was just the 1 day. I think I’ve only taken like 2 or maybe 3 sick days since the 3 years I’ve been at this job. I won’t do it though. I don’t have the guts. I don’t know. I’m also just struggling mentally still with the loss of Willow. I’m so afraid something will go wrong again this pregnancy. Every appointment feels like a death march. I hear stories of babies’ hearts stopping at 20 weeks, 28 weeks, stillborn babies. And I think god, it will be a miracle if this baby is born alive. I’ll say this, if something (god forbid) WAS to happen again, I am never going through this again. I am not going through morning s*ness, all of that, for nothing. I can’t. I have a living daughter and she will be enough. Anyway, thank you for listening to me rant. It’s therapeutic to write it all out. I hope everyone is doing well. - Kaitlyn

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jokertrap-ran · 3 years

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(光与夜之恋 Light and Night) Main Story Chapter 3-5: 海水与火焰 Seawater & Flames Translation

"It is only this sort of unbridled, unbound, soul-freeing freedom that suits me.”

*Light and Night Master-list *Spoiler free: Translations will remain under cut *Join the Light & Night Discord (＾▽＾)~ ♪ *Main story tag will be #For Light and Night

Following Osborn down the auditorium, we entered the team's resting area.

Tall glass display cabinets lined the wall, and displayed within were trophies that the race team won and photos of victory. They were all arranged by year. The spotlight shone downwards, making those glorious awards through the years appear even more dazzling. It made strolling down the stretch of display cabinets feel like stepping into an illusion of the past.

A familiar photo caught my attention: Osborn was standing on the podium, his helmet sandwiched between his arm and his side.

MC: This is the picture that An'an showed me back then…

I couldn't help but stand on tippy-toes to get a better look at it.

Osborn: The real deal's right beside you, why are you getting all besotted by a photo?

Although that's what he said, he still opened the glass door of the cabinet and took the photo down for me.

MC: When was this taken?

Osborn: When I first won the R1 championship.

He looked pretty young and inexperienced in the photo, with his head raised and an intent stare at the camera. It was almost as if he was gazing into the distance, at the era that would eventually belong to him.

MC: Osborn? What made you want to become a racer?

Osborn's eyes swept past the glass cabinet before falling back on me.

Osborn: Why do you want to be a fashion designer? My answer's the same as yours.

MC: Same as me? For passion?

Osborn: Every aspect of life requires me to endure and think things through; racing is the only thing that allows me to proceed onwards.

The same sharp glint in the picture that had been in his younger self's eyes was back in full force.

I couldn't help but snap an immediate shot of that.

Osborn: Come on then, let's head outside.

We headed out of the rest area and came to the first row of the auditorium. Coincidentally, another mock race was currently in progress.

❖☆———————————★❖

I didn't quite feel it back when I was still viewing from a distance, but now, standing here, I finally experienced what lightning speed truly felt like.

The wind rushed at us, vehemently blowing against our coats, making it flutter violently in the wind. My hair flew every this way and that from violent gusts, and I suddenly got the illusion that even all my troubles could be blown away...

The scene before me had already long since blurred away. I closed my eyes, embracing the world with my senses. At that moment, I heard the forceful thumping of my heart and the rushing of blood in my veins.

I couldn’t help but stretch out my arms, feeling like I was a bird who’d just escaped from the confines of its cage, or like a Père David's deer who’d broken free of its reins, bounding through the snow. The sheer joy of moving forwards without looking back at all was a marvellous one.

MC: I think I now understand what you were talking about earlier.

The look in his eyes suddenly grew more profound, with the vast blue sky reflected within his orbs.

Osborn: It is only this sort of unbridled, unbound, soul-freeing freedom that suits me.

MC: Freedom...

That’s right. I’d also ran back here from all the way abroad in search of freedom. This was the life I chose of my own accord.

I suddenly recalled the look of yearning that had been on Lin Yao’s face the other day when she mentioned the word “freedom” when she saw the race.

Somewhere in my heart was a little crevice that had been moved by that. Looking at the light reflecting off the race team’s logo, I was suddenly hit by a flash of inspiration.

MC: Osborn! I think I can make a collection of outfits with racing as the main theme!

MC: Representing danger and boundaries, there's a nearly crazed kind of romance in the freedom it brings!

MC: And at the same time, it also represents one moving courageously forwards, pushing through until the very end!

MC: If you're alright with it, I want to go to the rest area for another—

Suddenly, I realized that I'd been going off on my own tangent and had literally info-dumped him with my thoughts. I hurriedly zipped my mouth shut, offering him an apologetic smile.

MC: Sorry. I want to go to the rest area to snap a couple more shots as reference material. Can I?

Osborn nodded with a smile.

Osborn: No problemo.

❖☆———————————★❖

It was already near noon by the time I finished taking all the photos I needed. My original plan was to head home, but Osborn said that he too, had something else on, so he had to leave and could spare me a ride back, asking me to wait for him.

Walking up to the entrance, I suddenly saw a thinly built man standing at a distance not too far away. He wore a hat, and his silhouette was a tad familiar.

MC: I feel like I've seen him somewhere before…

Just as I squinted in an attempt to better make out the identity of the person, a sound suddenly sounded from the grass by my feet.

??: Meow!

MC: !

I took a step back, only to see a small white cat looking up at me with its big round eyes. It immediately started circling my legs the moment I lowered my head, turning my attention to it.

MC: So it was you, little one. You nearly scared me half to death!

I knelt down, picking up a green foxtail to poke fun at it. The cat happily stood up, waving its two small forepaws in the air as it batted at it. Much to my astonishment, I found that it had deep gashes on its paws; and they were still bleeding.

Then, in the next moment, it let out a yowl, nabbing my finger and biting down before it quickly fled into the grass with lightning speed.

MC: Ah!

Small drops of blood beaded from the wound on my fingertips. I quickly took a tissue from my bag and pressed it against the wound to stop the bleeding.

MC: I'm glad I got that tetanus shot back then…

My heart gave a few uncomfortable lurches. I didn’t understand why the cat had suddenly gone all feral. Then, the sound of heavy and ragged breathing suddenly sounded in the direction that the cat had fled!

A shadow fell upon me, shrouding me within its shadowy cloak as a pair of feet, belonging to a man, entered my field of vision.

MC: !!

I raised my head. It was the man I was scrutinizing earlier! He looked very haggard, with messy hair covering his face and features.

I suddenly realized where I’d seen him beforeー He was the bodyguard who’d walked out of Lin Yao’s dressing room back at the studio the other day and bumped into the set! What’s he doing here?

An inexplicable sense of panic reared its ugly head. I turned around with the intent of fleeing, but the man swiftly reached out and lunged at me!

MC: Hel—

❖☆———————————★❖

My cry for help never left my throat, for he’d already constricted my airway. I struggled vehemently against him, but to no avail. My vision started growing blurry.

The man leaned greedily into my neck as if it was some sort of delectable delicacy.

Man: Finally… Finally, I can live…

In a flash, I suddenly recalled the “vampire attack” incidents that An’an had previously told me about!

My heart suddenly froze in my chest as the chills started to spread. It was getting increasingly harder to breathe, and I was running out of energy to even put up a fight, fast. No… I can’t give up! Never!

However, the terrifying blow of pain that I’d been expecting never came to pass. With a wail of pain, the man let go of me. Gone was the pressure that had been on my airway earlier.

I fell into the warm embrace of a pair of arms.

❖☆———————————★❖

Opening my eyes, my vision was enraptured by a clear blue light that I’d never seen before.

Osborn was hovering protectively about me, his eyes fixated on the back of the figure that made a break for it. Blue flames burned bright within the confines of his palm, flickering and swaying.

Osborn: You good?

I incredulously widened my eyes, thinking that everything I’d just experienced, and everything I was seeing right now, was just part of a dream.

However, the throbbing pain that lingered on my neck and the strange sight before me both told me that: No, this was not a dream. Not in the slightest.

MC: Blue… flames?

Something flashed within Osborn’s eyes. He was seemingly just as surprised by it as well. Then, the blue flames died down, disappearing from his open palm.

Osborn: Are you hurt?

MC: No… Thank you.

I raised my hand to touch my neck; the fear within my heart still lingering.

❖☆————— ⊹ For Light & Night⊹ —————★❖

Previous Part: (Chapter 3-3) | Next Part: (Chapter 3-8)

#光与夜之恋 #Light and Night #Otome #Translations #Tencent #萧逸 #Osborn #齐司礼 #Sariel #陆沉 #Evan #查理苏 #Charlie #夏鸣星 #Jesse #For Light and Night

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