#also feel that Luther doesn’t drive either

[pearl-stonecutter]

I love how in the beginning of the first season Klaus cons Diego into giving him rides place because he says he can’t drive.

Then proceeds to drive an ice cream in the later half of the first season and then drive regularly throughout season 2 and 3

The point I am trying to make is Klaus just wanted quality brother time with Diego and Diego is to much of a softie to say no to everyone’s favorite brother.

#klaus hargreeves #diego hargreeves #the umbrella academy spoilers #the umbrella academy #i think Alison would give him a ride if he asked #Viktor obviously because he gave the whole fam a ride to sissy’s place #honestly surprised five didn’t drive on their road trip #umbrella ben would be driving if he wasn’t you know dead #ben May have only been sixteen when he died but I know he thinks of himself as a better driver than Klaus #also feel that Luther doesn’t drive either #moon buggy is one thing car nope #five hargreeves #allison hargreeves #luther hargreeves #lila pitts #lila tua #lila and Klaus shouldn’t be in a car together

[andro-dino]

for the oc ask. axel. 8 for luther, 16 for ezekial, and 38 for any of your ocs!

for creator asks, how about F?

What were they told to stop/start doing most often as a child?

I think probably a lot of what you’d kinda expect from someone in Luther’s kind of situation. A whole lot of “toughen up” “stand up straight” “treat this more seriously” that sort of thing. But in the more specific, probably more concerning areas, some “Stop showing your feelings so much” “Don’t get so attached” and “Don’t look away.” that last one particularly haunts him.

What makes their stomach turn?

At first, Ezekial was most put off when he started realizing what made Luther anxious. When they were waiting to get picked up from school and Luther would smile and wave goodbye when he walked away from him, but seeing how his face turned to stone as soon as closed the door of the sleek black car that always picked him up, when Luther would suddenly become panicked and jittery when that same car passed by them when they were out. At one point, it was the way Luther leveled out his voice while he lied to his face with frozen eyes that refused to tell him their secrets. Now, it’s not the way Luther speaks to him; he’s okay hearing Luther say how much he hates him and wants him gone because he knows it’s not true, and it’s not the way Luther treats him either; he’s endured enough that getting punched and kicked and thrown doesn’t really phase him anymore, no, what really makes Ezekial feel particularly sick now is having to watch what Luther’s become. It’s the same face he’s always known, if maybe a bit more refined, the same face that used to be so kind and bright, but now won’t even show so much as a quirk of the corner of his lips. It’s the same voice he’s always heard, that’s always laughed and joked with him and sung his praise and support, but now it’s lower, more level, never daring to ever be any louder or more expressive unless it’s to yell at him. It’s the way that he has to wonder what Luther has had to do, to experience, to force himself to commit to, that makes Ezekial particularly uneasy.

What memory do they revisit the most often? 

Axyl often tends to think about the first time they “quit” beyblade. When they took the tear stained wooden practice bey Ryo carved for them and threw it right back at his chest, vowing they’d never pick up a bey again, and the talk Hyoma and aer had later. In contrast, it also often thinks back to the way they were first drawn to its gemios. How they felt compelled to pick it up in the sand and how well it fit in aer hand.

Essi tends to dwell a lot on the first time she lost to Gingka and felt good about it, and how that was what lit the fire in her to keep going and continue to become stronger and stronger.

Ezekial never forgets his and Luther’s big argument. It haunts his every living moment, it’s his biggest regret and fear and strongest driving force. He remembers how Luther yelled at him like he’d never yelled before and how quickly his attempt at a solemn face broke into frustration and hot, angry tears. He will never stop thinking about the moment Luther finally turned away from him.

Luther doesn’t dwell on the past.

What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

I think it changes for every one of my characters.

For Juno, I kinda just always “IBWIBWIBWIBWIBWIBWIBWIBIIIIII 💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞” whenever I think about her. She makes me extremely happy and I want to put her on a little velvet cushion in a glass case and display her on a shelf in a big fancy main hall of a big fancy palace.

Essi I want to squish and roll out like a little ball of play doh. She brings me joy, though also kinda hits really hard when I think about her primary conflicts and how heavily and personally I project onto her in those regards.

Axyl i tend to kinda be embarrassed about because I remember that he’s a character that is a very obvious beyblade self insert and I go “this is so cringe” but I’m also very affectionate towards him because despite being a very close self insert he’s also very much his own character and I enjoy getting to take the things I think and experience as the person I am and flesh them out and voice them on a vessel besides myself. It’s very therapeutic but also just an interesting story for a character. I feel like media tends to focus a lot on characters who are very skilled and strong already getting stronger and more strong and I constantly want more serious focus on characters who actually kinda suck and what they do and are weak and lame because that’s kinda what I am at most things, and Axyl’s kinda my opportunity to see that. I enjoy fleshing out its character because it gives me an opportunity to write something I wanna see more of.

Kosuke brings me psychic damage most of the time tbh. I’ve had kinda bastard characters before but I have no idea how he specifically morphed into the bastard he is today. It is literally so far off now from what I originally wanted him to be and I’m not entirely unconvinced that it wasn’t his own doing and willing their being into existence thru sheer freak energy alone. I like that other people are interested in him but he’s become such a freak at this point that I don’t even know what to do with them. They are more of a weirdo than any character I’ve ever had and I feel like that’s saying something. They’ve become more powerful than I am at this point. I’m kinda afraid of him, but they’re also stupid and dumb and I very frequently slap him against the wall like a wet wad of spaghetti in my head.

Ezekial is interesting because I feel like I’ve only recently started to take him more seriously. Looking back at a lot of old doodles of him and revisiting the ideas I had for him is interesting bc he used to be a lot more goofy and comedic all the time and while that is still partially a part of his character, it’s a lot more sad now and he just makes me sad /pos. He’s such a poor wet dog trying to make the best of what he can and he makes me so upset and I want to tuck him gently into bed and give him a cup of hot cocoa but I know very well that that is not what I’m going to do. He’s an interesting character to write and think about and he’s just so incredibly upsetting.

Luther I want to squeeze aggressively until his eyes pop out of his head like one of those pencil toppers you’d see at school book fairs. He’s so repressed and sad and pathetic and has so many problems and he’s so infuriating and dumb. He also makes me immensely sad, with how messed up his backstory is and how is present actions are very much a reflection of everything he’s endured and how long it’d take for him to recover, if ever. There’s one scene specifically that I probably won’t share publicly for a very long time if at all that is such an emotional rollercoaster with the false security it brings at first and HEAVY emotional drop at the end that just. ourgh. ourghhh. a lot of emotional scenes with him in them make me feel like that. I love writing him so much but oooooooouuuuurghhhh he hurts me so bad.

#mfb oc #ocs #ezekial and luther #axel’s silly little thoughts #long one here #I really liked writing Ezekial’s bit smile #these guys make me feel sooooo many feelings

[phoenixes-and-wizards]

tua headcanon (amusement park day!!):

it takes them approximately an hour to leave, and it's all because of klaus who keeps on adding all sorts of ridiculous things to their itinerary

and they don't plan on doing so, but somehow they all end up wearing something blue, so yay team

"are we there yet" "i sWEAR TO GOD IF SOMEBODY ASKS THAT ONE MORE TIME--"

"ARE WE THERE YET!!!!!" "jesus, klaus, what the fuck is wrong with you?" "you didn't say exclamatory sentences weren't allowed, allison"

ben just rolls his eyes and mutters "lord give me strength" under his breath

most of the time, luther's too big to go on the rides so the duty of guarding their stuff falls to him instead

after the third ride, ben notices the sad slope of luther's shoulders and opts to keep his brother company instead. when luther tells him to "go on ahead, i'm fine," ben just gives him a Look™️ and plants his butt into the seat next to his brother, making a big show of feeling pukey and pulling out the books he'd brought for the long ride

throughout the day, they make a contest out of trying to make ben smile. obviously this ben isn't as cheery as their ben, but he's still ben, if that makes any sense, and that's good enough for all six of them

surprisingly, it's five who insists on taking pictures everywhere. when they catch him buying a photo album from one of the many souvenir shops scattered around the park, none of them say a word

vanya is surprisingly hyperactive, darting here and there like a squirrel all hyped up on sugar. they don't blame her; their father never took her on "family vacations" and even if he did, it was only so someone could watch the room while they frolicked on the beach

when diego dares klaus to ride the fastest roller coaster in the park--twice!!!--in exchange for shotgun privileges later, klaus all-but drags diego onto the ride and throws his hands up the entire time. diego ends up vomiting all over klaus' shoes as a result

when they stop for lunch, allison insists that they take a proper family photo. while they wait for their food, allison edits it properly and immediately sets it as her wallpaper

the haunted house is wide enough that even luther can enter, and they all laugh when diego scares five and he teleports to the end of the hallway with a strangled yelp

"very funny diego" "oh i assure you it was, five"

ben smirks but hurriedly covers it because he wants vanya--who is slowly shaping up to be his favorite sibling--to win

there's a particularly hilarious photo of diego with his mouth wide open on the jungle jam, water spraying his entire face, and his siblings decide to get one copy each for blackmail material

they end up getting matching ugly headbands from the souvenir store. vanya and klaus wear theirs with pride throughout the park, and even though diego makes a big show of calling it ugly, he doesn't take his off either

ben spends the entire day getting to know his siblings. for some reason, he already knows a couple of the things they tell him even before they finish their sentences; an unshakable feeling that goes all the way to his bones. it's slightly unsettling, but also easy to forget when he sees the way allison's eyes light up when he somehow remembers that she's allergic to mangoes and peaches

allison practically falls over herself with delight when somebody's dog trots over to her and demands a belly rub

all of them end up being pretty attached to the dog, so discussions to have a team pet are brought up once more

"save it for the team meetings, guys" "you're the only one who actually listens to those meetings, luther" "we'll be talking about getting a dog--" "say no more”

they all tease vanya when one of the guards mistake her for a kid and almost forbids her to ride on the second tallest roller coaster in the park

luther jokingly asks her if she'd like a ride on his shoulders, and is even more surprised when she agrees, and that's how they end up walking around the park with vanya perched atop luther like a particularly huge five-year-old

five buys her a balloon to add to the joke, but soon, klaus starts complaining that he wants one as well, so five buys another and forks it over: a large bear cub that klaus names "davey" and doesn't let it out of his sight for the rest of the day

diego manages to capture a snapshot of vanya smearing chocolate sauce all over ben's cheek. he doesn't tell anyone else, but he keeps it in his wallet for a good amount of time and calls it his lucky charm

the ben contest ends when klaus swan-dives into one of the fountains, and when one of the guards try to call him out, klaus simply runs away and pretends he's a completely different person when he rejoins them, and it's so stupid but ben can't recall the last time anyone was ever this silly and fun around him, and so he snorts, and klaus immediately starts to crow because "ha, that counts!!! in your face, diego!"

they stay for the fireworks show, and when it finally starts, all seven of them sprawl out on the grass, crane their necks back, and cheer along with the rest of the crowd at the pretty lights

after a few seconds, ben realizes something’s up with klaus because his eyes have gone all glassy and not-quite-there, and when he lays a hand on his brother’s shoulder, klaus grabs his shirt collar none-too-gently before he slowly comes back to the present 

five recognizes all the signs of ptsd because he’s had them before, and before klaus can protest, he eases his brother’s head down into his lap and cards his fingers through klaus’ curly hair until he calms down. he’s still a bit jumpy every time a particularly loud one pops overhead, but he’s definitely more relaxed now that there’s something familiar to ground him

allison decides it’s been a long day for everyone after that, and no one disagrees because the sooner they get home, the sooner they can make cocoa for klaus under the pretense of being unable to sleep themselves

there's a pretty intense game of rock-paper-scissors in the parking lot over who gets to drive because all of them are bone-tired and want to nap

when luther loses, everyone mysteriously gets re-energized, and soon enough, they're singing cheesy 2000s pop songs at the top of their lungs

five keeps rolling his eyes and saying "i can just teleport home, you know" but klaus latches onto his right arm and vanya his left, and so he stays. they're still holding onto him when they fall asleep later, their heads pillowed on his shoulders, and although he makes a big show of displeasure at being used as a human stuffed toy, he rests his head against klaus' and only moves again when they're turning into their street

the next day at breakfast, klaus is still wearing the stupid headband

#the umbrella academy #tua #ua #umbrella academy #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #five hargreeves #ben hargreeves #vanya hargreeves #tom hopper #david castañeda #emmy raver-lampman #robert sheehan #aidan gallagher #justin h. min #ellen page #spaceboy #the kraken #the rumor #the seance #the boy #the horror #the white violin #tua headcanons #tw: ptsd #tw: panic attack

[fiveisnumber1]

Timeless - Five Hargreeves x Reader

Main story parts:

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30

_________________________

Pt 30 - Countdown to Chaos

After Five had vanished to go make a deal with the devil, you stood in the emptiness of the night staring at the spot where he had been. You weren't sure how you thought the night was supposed to go but it definitely didn't go the way it should've. It was a mess, an absolute clusterfuck, and yet, you weren't surprised. Of course, the Hargreeves were going to have a hard time confronting their father. They hadn't seen the man in years, especially Five, who had seen him last when he ran away from home and got stuck. You knew their trauma was long-lasting but they could've worked together rather than working against each other. And now here you all were, separated again and having to go down even more risky channels to get out of this god-forsaken timeline. You shook your head and let out a sigh as there was nothing left to do tonight but go home. Slowly you turned away from the building and walked the block slowly to where Charlie said he'd be parked. As you approached you made your way over to the passenger side and opened the door. Charlie looks over towards you and immediately notices the look on your face.

"Oh it was BAD bad, wasn't it?" He asks

As you got in the passenger seat you slumped down in it and replied,

"Immensely so."

"I called it. I knew having them get together with their dad was going to be worse than yesterday." Charlie comments as he starts to drive away

You knew he was right and he did call it but this was not the place to be doing so. The world was on a collision course and you were right in the path of destruction. You turn your head to look at him as you state,

"This is no time for bragging Charlie, things got really messed up."

"Well, it's not like you revealed your powers," Charlie says nonchalantly

You place your face in your hands as you slump further into your seat. Charlie takes a glance over to you as he drives and questions,

"You didn't reveal your powers, right?"

Taking your face out of your hands you look towards him with an awkward grimaced expression but don't say any words. Charlie glances back over and you and when he realizes you're not saying anything he slams on the breaks stopping the car. His eyes go wide as he quickly states,

"(Y/N), this is bad."

"I know!" you exclaim

"(Y/N) this is really bad. How did this happen?" He replies, a hint of panic in his voice

"I didn't really plan on doing it but then Reggie was going on a tirade at Diego and Diego was getting so sad and so I got mad and I threw a knife at Reggie and became visible and then I had to explain myself and then I got angrier and started showing off my powers and now he knows I have powers and I really fucked up." You rant frantically

"Oh no, this is bad...this is bad."

"That's not even the worst part." You complain

"What could be worse than showing your powers to Reginald?!"

"HE SAID HE WAS MY FATHER!" You yell

"Oh god, that IS worse!" Charlie exclaims back "Oh this is so bad. This is really really bad (Y/N)."

"I know and like...I love all the Hargreeves dearly, even Luther who is being a dick to me right now, but holy shit when everyone gets together everything falls apart and so fast. Like surprisingly fast."

"What do we do? Do you have a plan? You have a plan right?" Charlie asks distressed

"Well, I don't think I can get Allison to rumor him into forgetting I have powers because that would require getting her to see him in person again and having the two of them talk long enough that she can rumor him which seems unlikely. So in terms of a plan...we have no plan."

"No there has to be a plan." Charlie remarks "Okay okay. What if we all go to Europe? You, me, your boyfriend, and all of his family just up and leave for Europe right now. We'll change our names and start new lives."

"No that wouldn't work."

"Why not?"

"Those people can not effectively gather together even if their life depended on it and I'm pretty sure only you and I have passports at this time so we would be the only ones allowed outside of the country."

"Damn, you're right. "

"Also, on a lesser note, the world is ending in a few days so even if we did all manage to go to Europe it probably would be all for naught."

Charlie sucks in his breath before letting it out defeated. Plopping back into his seat, he looks at the roof of the car before asking,

"So what do we do now then?"

"We go home." You reply quietly

Charlie continues to look up at the ceiling for a bit before letting out a huff. Tilting his head back down to look at the road, he places his hands back on the wheels and slowly starts to drive back to your house. You shook your head disappointment across your face as you thought about the predicament you were in. The predicament you all were in. As you continued to lean back in your seat as you looked at the passing flashes of street lights above. Everything was moving so fast. You knew you would get home at some point no matter how slow Charlie drove or how long the path he drove took and you were worried about what lied at the end of that drive.

Five was not happy with what lied at the end of his journey either. His siblings couldn't keep it together for one evening. Not even an hour. It was ridiculous how unreliable they were. And yet, here he was making his way to the second to last person on earth he'd ask for help to try and get them all back to 2019 where they belonged. He needed to get all of his siblings out of this time but he especially wanted to get you out of here. If he could get everyone back to 2019 then things would be okay and the two of you could have the life together that you deserved.

Five's mind was filled with the thoughts of you. He needed to get you out of this timeline, especially now that this version of his father knew you had powers. He didn't think that his father would hurt you, especially since he had called himself your father, but Reginald was still Reginald and Five was worried about what would come next. You were probably on your way back to the house you shared with that man and any number of things could happen between now and the time he saw you next. He needed to get this contingency plan over with and fast. Arriving at the hotel the handler was staying at he made his way up to the second floor to room 217. As he approached the double-doored room he felt a sense of deja vu. It was only five days for him since he had last met up with her at a different semi-formal hotel room. Five paused in front of the door and took a breath. Raising his hand up he knocked on the door and within seconds the double doors opened to reveal the handler standing behind them. it was as if she knew he was coming. The handler had her signature smile on her face, one that looked happy but hid a sinister nature behind it.

"Ah! Just in time for a nightcap." She commented before heading into the room

Five hesitated for a second before cautiously stepping into the room. He took a look around and the place and once he felt he had scoped it out enough turned around and shut the doors behind him. A critical look was on his face as he approached where the handler stood. With two drinks in her hand and a cigarette between her teeth, the handler turned to look at Five.

"To be clear, I take out the board you get me and my family home. No more doomsday, no more apocalypse. Is that correct?" Five questioned

With a drink in hand, the handler walked over to a nightstand by the bed and picks up a piece of paper before proceeding to slowly lay on her side across the bed. She looks up at Five and replies,

"That's the deal."

Five bites the inside of his cheek as he looks around the room. He really didn't want to do this. He knew that working with her was never going to end well and yet the desire to save you and his family was worth the risk that might come with this deal. Looking back at the handler, Five states,

"Then I'm in."

The handler twiddles a piece of paper in between her fingers before extending it out for Five to take. Five doesn't move from his spot trying not to get any closer to her but leans in slightly so he can grab the paper. Once he takes it from her he unfolds it and reads what it says.

The Lonely Lodger Inn.

Oshkosh, Wisconsin, 1982.

"So how do I get there and back?" Five questioned

"I have a briefcase for you. Specifically, programmed for two trips. One to take you to the exact time and place listed on that note where the board is and one to take you right back to Dallas, on the morning of November 22nd, 1963."

Clever. Of course, she wouldn't just hand him a regular briefcase, then he would be able to bring everyone back without having to go kill the board. Five hated how she was one step ahead of him.

"Where is it?" Five asked

"Oh, the briefcase is in the corner over there." The handler replied taking another puff of her cigarette

Five looked towards his right to the corner of the room she had gestured to and saw a briefcase sitting there. Carefully, he made his way over and grabbed it. As he did so he could feel the handler's laser-like gaze on him, boring into his back. It sent an odd feeling down his spine that he didn't appreciate. Picking up the briefcase, he pocketed the note she gave him before turning around and heading towards the door. As Five reaches out for the door handle, the handler comments,

"Y'know Five, I'm getting pretty tired of not getting to meet your sweet little girlfriend in person. I'm sure you're doing this for her, aren't you?"

Five turns on his heel and with vile in his voice retorts,

"My reasons for doing this are none of your business and you will never meet her."

"Aw, don't be so harsh. I just want to see her up close and take a look at that pretty face you happen to love so much." The handler teases

"If you so much as lay a hand on her I will personally make sure that when you are killed you stay dead this time." Five rebukes

He was done with the handler's games. He hated the way that she talked about you, it made his blood boil, and if the handler wasn't the person he needed to help get everyone out of Dallas he probably would've killed her on the spot. He just hoped that you'd never have to see her in person. Turning back around Five opens the door and starts to walk out. From behind her Five can hear the handler call out,

"We'll see Five. I have my ways."

Not looking back Five stated,

"And I have mine."

And just like that, he was gone and on his way to get back to you as soon as possible.

Soon was not soon enough though because with each minute you got closer and closer to arriving back home at the mansion in Dallas. You and Charlie drove down the road towards the house quietly, nervous tension in the air. Both of you worried about what might occur next. As you passed the estate in which Klaus lived with his cult you knew the drive was almost over. Mentally you tried to prepare yourself as the car rolled up into the driveway of the house. Slowly the car came to a stop in front of the main door. You and Charlie both looked towards the door but didn't move from the car. You weren't nervous per se but this was uncharted territory having someone other than Charlie know about your powers, especially since it was Reggie. After a moment the two of you carefully opened the doors to the car and step out. Closing the car door you stare up at the house that only a few days ago you'd comfortably enter and exit with ease. Charlie makes his way around the car and stands next to you. The two of you continue to look up at the towering building as Charlie states,

"We can dip if you want."

A small smile came to your face and you felt a bit better hearing your friend correctly use one of your future words.

"Good usage." you complimented

"Thank you, but I'm serious. We can go. I'll speed us back to town we can find your boyfriend and just...I don't know do something."

You paused for a second. You could run but it wouldn't be like you. You had been in worse situations in life. You had jumped through time and started over when you were 13, you had fought criminals on multiple occasions, you had almost died, and then jumped through time and started over again. A fire built within you as you remembered the fact that you had lived with since you first met Reginald. You were stronger than this man, he had no hold over you.

"No, Charlie. I've been in worse situations. Whatever lies for me on the other side of that door I can deal with it."

Charlie looked towards and saw the determined look in your eyes as you stared at the building. A smirk came to his face as he could see the fire of courage radiating off of you, but Charlie's smirk faltered though. From the start, your strength had always impressed him, and yet even with your evident bravery he couldn't help but worry for you, his only friend. Charlie let out a breath he didn't know he was holding in before saying,

"Okay, let's go."

You gave him a small nod and the two of you walked into the house. As you arrived in the foyer Marie approached you with a smile on her face. With her hands clasped together in front of her, she greeted,

"Welcome home, (Y/N) and hello, Charlie. Sir Hargreeves has requested to speak with you in his office at your earliest convenience."

"Oh, thank you. We'll head there straight away." You formally replied

You and Charlie started to walk in the direction of his office but Marie stepped in front of the two of you blocking the path. A smile still on her face as she added,

"Alone, miss (Y/N)."

You turned to look at Charlie and you could see the concern in his eyes even if the rest of his face looked blank. Turning to your friend you looked up at him and calmly say,

"Go to my room, Charlie."

Charlie looks at you and his mouth opens a little bit as if he was about to say something but you place a hand on his shoulder squeezing it tightly as you look him in the eyes. In a steady tone you direct,

"Go to my room, Charlie."

Charlie lets out a sigh before giving you a small nod and turning away. You watch as he walks up the foyer stairs to head to your room before turning away and walking towards the office. When you arrive at where the office was you see the door is already open and Reginald is sitting behind his desk vigorously writing in his notebook. Stepping into the doorway you speak in a flat tone,

"You requested my presence?"

"Yes. Take a seat." Reginald replies not looking up from his writing "And get the door will you."

You let out a small huff before walking into the room and closing the door behind you. Approaching him you sit in a chair on the opposite side of the desk, displeasure on your face. You watch as he continues to write not saying anything or even looking up at you. Rolling your eyes you start the conversation,

"Why am I here Reggie?"

Placing his pen down, he stops writing in his notebook and looks up to focus on you. Clasping his hands together he places them on his desk as he responds formally,

"I have questions."

"About what?" you question unenthused

"You, for one" He states, "But also my apparently seven adopted children, and this awful future you all seem to mention."

Your head tilts to the side curiously as a wry smile appears on your face. Crossing your arms you lean back into your chair and look at him. A Latin phrase you had heard many times came to your mind.

"Saepe ne utile quidem est scire quid futuram sit," You spoke

The phrase meaning, often it is not advantageous to know what will be. There was an irony to the words as the person who had said them to you so many times was the man sitting before you. Granted, he had said this to you during the years you lived with him in the future, but it was ironic nonetheless. Reginald's eyebrows raised at your words, looking almost impressed with your response. Leaning forward slightly Reginald replies,

"Sapiens autem semper ad futurum parari."

Knowing Reginald, he would figure out the answers to his questions by whatever means he had to. You were not a fan of the idea of talking about the future with him but if you answered his questions you could at least shape the narrative. Letting out a small breath you uncrossed your arms and sat upright. Reluctantly you nodded towards him, agreeing to whatever line of questioning he had in mind, but added,

"I'll answer questions but I get to decide on how much information is given."

"Fair enough." He responds, reopening his notebook "You were born on the same day as my alleged children?"

"They are your children." You state "and yes, I was on October 1st, 1989 at 12 p.m. sharp like all the others that day."

"But you mentioned you had a father back at dinner." Reginald comments

You paused for a moment. It had been so long since you fully stopped and thought about your dad. It was so long since you last saw him, almost a decade at this point, but you did have a father, and he was the best one you could've asked for. Speaking up again you said,

"I did. He was not biologically related to me but he raised me as if I was. All the children born that day were spontaneous. The women were not pregnant when the day started but by noon all of them had given birth."

"Curious." Reginald remarks

He takes down some notes before looking up at you again and inquiring,

"So if you had your own family, how did you come about mine?"

"Accidentally." You answer curtly

"Elaborate." Reginald requests

You paused again to think about how to word the information he was asking for. You and the Hargreeves had already left an impact on this timeline which made you concerned about the impacts on the future. Although there was a chance everything would be normal upon your return to 2019, you still wondered what could happen given your involvement in the 1960s. You had to be careful with how much you spoke because if the timeline was changed you suspected he might try to find and adopt you. It's not like your mother would even consider giving you up, nor did she ever report the details of your spontaneous birth to anyone other than your father, so you were not one of the 43 he would know about but still...it was risky. You needed to express enough information to quell his curiosity but not enough to implicate yourself and your family.

"My family was around the mansion up north, close enough that the rumors of an eccentric billionaire adopting seven mysterious children, born the same day and time as me, who never left the house, made their way to my parents' ears. They outright told me not to go near the house but curiosity got the best of me and I went anyway." You explain "I used my powers to get through the gates and became invisible to sneak into the courtyard. I just went to have a look around but instead, I was accidentally pushed over a bench and that's when I first came in contact with your family. Specifically, your son Five."

"The one you're partnered with." Reginald certifies

"Correct." You affirm

Reginald turns back down to look at his notebook and writes more in it. You couldn't really see what he was writing but the number of lines of words appearing down on the paper made you both curious and concerned.

"A peculiar first meeting, but I've probably heard worse," Reginald utters as he continues to write

"Oh, thanks." You remarked sarcastically, rolling your eyes

No matter the situation or person he always seemed to find a way to criticize things.

"And the rest of them?"

"I had been using my powers to spend time with Five without being noticed but at some point, we were found out. We came clean and soon after I was introduced to the rest of the children." You say, recalling that first meeting with his siblings

Oh, how simple times were when you were all small and young and the biggest problem you faced was getting enough time to hang out between you going to school and them fighting crime. Things were better back then. Easier. And once again you wondered what life would've been like if Five hadn't jumped all those years ago. You were pulled out of your nostalgic thoughts when you heard Reginald go,

"Interesting."

Placing his pen down Reginald turns back to you.

"I'm assuming the children were under my instruction with their powers, so why are you more powerful and less problematic than them?"

It took a second to register his words but when you did you tilted your head and furrowed your eyebrows at him. Did he really just ask that? How dare he speak about them like that. You knew that he had only met them in passing so it was infuriating to you that he'd to even be making such statements. Now, was he technically correct? Yes. But it didn't give him the right to do so because he didn't know them so he had no basis to talk about such matters. You let out a huff as you started to explain,

"Why am I more powerful? Well, for one I kind of won the power lottery. The power to manipulate molecules, the things that make up our existence, generally can cast a wider net of potential abilities than super strength or rumoring people to do things. Their powers are valid and useful but it's hard to diversify those assets."

As you thought about how you needed to explain this to Reginald you could feel a fire build within you. You sat upright in your chair, with your shoulder back and your arms firmly seated on the armrests, hands forming into fists. You stared him down as he waited for more of a response and when you had formed your thoughts you chastised,

"On top of that, I chose to develop my powers naturally. My parents helped build a foundation so I wouldn't blow the house up or get stuck in a wall but after that, I dictated if I wanted to learn or not. There was no forcing, coercion, or expectations. I learned because I wanted to and my parents supported my efforts with love. It might sound cliche but love truly is the most powerful force in this world, and I'm less 'problematic' as you put it because you didn't raise me. I was raised with that love."

Reginald looked at you quietly, readjusting himself in his seat before saying,

"Are you insinuating that the reason that group was an uncouth disgrace to my legacy was due to my parentage?"

"Insinuating? No. Stating? Yes." you retorted

"Oh really now?" He questioned

"Your children have their issues, but it was of no fault of their own. It was you who instilled these deep-rooted traumas and conflicts in them and provided them with no parental guidance on how to deal with these issues. They had no support system. They were child soldiers rather than children. You gave them numbers one through seven and reduced them to a ranking scale." You berated

You stared at Reginald intensely and he could see the fire in your eyes. Literal fire in your eyes that were red and flickered like glowing embers. Your emotions boiling over to the point where you were starting to physically express them with your power. Reginald's eyes widened as he saw the power you held. Picking up his pen he began to take more notes, but you felt as if you were going to explode if you continued to sit in the chair across from him. Getting up quickly you walked away from the seat and across the room to look out the window. Facing away from him you continued to say,

"And when they were all gone you gave me the number zero because you thought I was better than them. I rejected that number because I am a person and I am not better than them. But the reason you like me so much, the reason you've always liked me better, placed me higher, whether you explicitly showed it or not, is because I'm everything you wanted them to be that they never became. And why is that? Because I was raised as a human not an object of violence."

"So I'm the problem," Reginald replied

"Yes, and the problems only got worse after the incident." You stated

"Where Five ran away into the future and brought you with him?" Reginald suggested

Your eyes went wide as you whipped around to face him, the angry fire within you building as you demanded,

"How do you know about that?"

Reginald looked at you calmly and said,

"He told me when I pulled him away to chat."

You stopped for a second as you processed his words. You didn't expect Five to tell him about that but perhaps he felt open enough to do so. You thought about that day, the one where everything changed, and everyone was put into a more difficult situation than before. Your anger started to fade as you thought about your darker days post jump and the horrors Five had dealt with. Letting out a breath you started to calm down and looking towards the ground you quietly explained,

"Well, yes that was the incident. He got stuck in a wasteland, I was dropped into 2013 where everything that I knew was gone, and the rest of your children had to deal with the fallout of Five's rash decision."

"Unfortunate." Reginald curtly commented

You looked up towards him and looked back towards you. You could see some type of shift in his demeanor before he continued,

"He also mentioned that he spent 45 years in said apocalypse and is most likely older than I am now. Was that in jest? Because it didn't come off that way. And if so I don't know how comfortable I am with you dating someone almost 3 times your age even if he is both my son and the most competent boy I've met so far."

Oh god, not this again. He was acting as a parent. As your father. Disgusting. Your anger and sadness completely faded away and your witty and sarcastic demeanor returned in full swing.

"That's too bad buckaroo." You responded "He looks my age and that's what people are going to notice. Also, he's my best friend, you don't get a say in my dating life, I do what I want."

"Ugh, insolent child. Whatever will I do with you?" Reginald asked rhetorically as he shook his head in disappointment

"Not sure, but something is comforting about you sounding just like the Reggie from the future Umbrella Academy. But let me be honest here, Umbrella Academy is kind of a stupid name. I mean it's on-point branding given your business but it doesn't inspire anything." You explained in a joking yet critical tone

Reginald sat back in his chair as he listened to you rant and criticize the academy he had created. Picking up his pen he began to jot down notes about the criticisms you were giving.

"And don't get me started on that dumb motto. Ut Malum Pluvia." you rant "When evil reigns? I mean I appreciate a good play on words and I can commend you for that but it's so...depressing. You expected your children to save the world with such a hope-crushing motto sewn on their uniform?"

"Well then what would you do?" Reginald asked looking up from his writing

"If I was the parent of seven super-powered children and created an academy with the purpose of saving the world I'd probably take some influence from my mom because she was so bright and hopeful for me before the incident happened and that hope she instilled in me kept me going after."

"So what would you call your academy then?"

You thought for a moment about your mother. The one who unexpectedly gave birth to you and yet called you her own the minute you were born. The one who gave everything to make sure you had the best life. The one who raised you to be the best you could be. The same one who loved and protected you, and whose memory helped to keep you going after you had both disappeared in your own ways. You faded into your thoughts as you recalled the many experiences you shared with her and settled on the one that stood out most.

"The Sparrow Academy." you answered genuinely "My mother used to take me out on summer nights and early mornings before the sun came up to hear the sparrows sing. They were her favorite bird and she always told me that a sparrow's song in the dark leads to a brighter future."

"Canticum in Tenebris." Reginald spoke

"Yes, a song in the dark. Every little bit would all be influenced by her. I have loved many people in my life but if I had to be a part of some academy of children, I'd do it if it was in memory of her."

Reginald finished penning down all that you had said to him and looked up towards you once more. Looking back you broke the silence and asked,

"Do you have any more questions?"

"No."

"Well if we're done here I will be heading to my room because, in all honesty, you terrify Charlie and the longer I stay here the more he'll probably assume I'm dead."

Walking towards the door of the office you hear Reginald's voice from behind you,

"Goodnight, (Y/N)."

"Goodbye, Reginald."

As you walk out and close the door to the office you make your way back to the foyer so that you could head upstairs to your room. As you do so you see Grace standing in the foyer looking at some piece of paper. When she looks up and sees you she folds the paper up and places it in the pocket of her cardigan.

"Hey, sweetie," She greets

"Oh hey, mom," you respond

"I saw you came from the direction of Reggie's office. Is everything alright?" She asks

"Oh yeah, we were just discussing my new car." You lied

Your mom didn't seem to pick up on your lie though. Instead, she looked around the foyer before taking a step closer to you.

"Well, that's nice." She said "You know what I was thinking? How about you and I pack up all our stuff and take a long trip?"

You were confused as to why she was speaking in a lower tone of voice. It was as if she was trying to hide something or keep others from listening. You lowered your voice a bit as well but tried to act as if everything was normal.

"That sounds fun. Is Reggie coming?" You inquired

"I have to talk with him about his work and then we'll see if he comes along." She answers

"Oh. Alright." You said

Your mom took another step towards you and leaned in closer, cupping your face in her hands. There was a smile on her face as she held you but the emotion in her eyes was less so of happiness and more so of concern. Looking you directly in the eyes your mom quietly states,

"Great, now you go pack everything. Okay?"

Her tone of voice was less like a suggestion and more like a command. And the way she emphasized the word everything took you back a little bit and sent a small chill down your spine. You looked at your mom for answers but she said nothing more.

"Uh." you paused before hesitantly continuing "Okay mom."

Your mom let go of your face and pulled you into a tight hug. Without another word, she walked off towards the living room and you headed up to your room. Opening the door you see Charlie sitting on your bed vigorously bouncing his leg, his hands clasped together so tightly that his knuckles were turning extremely white. When he heard the door open his head shot up to look at you and he sprang off the bed. You entered the room and closed the door behind you before turning back to your friend.

"Are you okay?" He questioned concerned

"I'm fine. Although I did just have a very odd conversation with my mom."

"What happened?"

"I'm honestly not sure. She seemed slightly paranoid and told me to pack up all my stuff. It's not like her." You explained as you paced about your room

"Is she trying to make a run for it with you?" Charlie asked

"Maybe? I don't know." you answered "Although I don't even know what would have her so worried that she wants us to run away, especially since she was completely fine this morning."

"That's very odd." Charlie comments "So what happened with Sir Reginald?"

"Quite a bit. Why don't you take a seat." You suggested

Charlie sat down on the foot of your bed as you paced in front of him recounting as best as you could what had happened in your meeting with Reginald. As you started to detail the events, Five had finally finished his journey to get to you. It took a bit given the fact that where you were and where the handler was were practically on the opposite side of town. The hotel the handler was staying in was nice enough but it still was on the lesser side of Dallas, while you were living in the more affluent area. Five had to navigate his way across town but at least he knew exactly where you were. When he had found the invitation to the Mexican Consulate the address listed on the envelope was not that of 82 Olive Street where the D.S. Umbrella Manufacturing Company was located so he assumed it was sent to the house in which you lived. Carefully, he made his way up the driveway making sure to not be seen by anyone. As he did so he saw Charlie's convertible parked out front confirming that you were here. Making his way around the back he stood in the cover of the trees as he looked through the windows to see if he could find you. On the backside of the house, he could see you in what he assumed to be your room pacing about the place. He needed to get your attention but didn't want to accidentally startle you and alert his presence to the whole mansion and he didn't even know if you were alone in the room as well. Looking around for something he saw some pebbles on the ground. Picking one up he threw it at your balcony door.

From inside, you and Charlie stopped talking and both turned your heads toward the balcony as you heard a small sound of something outside.

"What was that?" You asked

"I don't know." He responded

The two of you stayed quiet as you waited for anything else to happen. After a few moments, the sound of a small ping on the glass of your balcony door could be heard. Charlie stood up from the bed and two of you looked at each other for a second. Slowly, you both approach the balcony doors and as you did another ding could be heard. Looking down onto the balcony you saw a few small rocks scattered.

"Someone is throwing rocks at your window," Charlie said

"Well, as long as it's not Hoyt's son Halvor outside I think it'll be okay." You commented

"I now hope it's Halvor." Charlie replies "I want a Romeo and Juliet scenario but you outright insult him instead."

You rolled your eyes at Charlie as you carefully opened the doors to the balcony and stepped onto it to look down at the ground below. Fortunately, it was not Halvor and instead was your beloved Five. Turning to look back at Charlie you stated,

"It's Five, Charlie."

"Aw man," Charlie says disappointed "It's just regular Romeo and Juliet for me I guess..."

"You're a dork." You replied

"Hey!" He exclaimed

You ignored him though and turned to look back at Five who looked up at you with a smile on his face.

"What are you doing here?" You asked in a hushed tone

"I have a plan to get us out of here." He replies mimicking your tone as he holds up a briefcase

You take a look around outside to check that no one is around before waving your boyfriend up to you and whispering,

"Come up here."

Five nods his head and spatial jumps up to the balcony and steps into your room. You close the door to the balcony behind him and close the drapes so no one can see into your room from the outside anymore. Looking at Charlie you command,

"Lock the door."

Charlie gives a quick nod and heads over to the door as you turn your attention back to Five.

"You got a briefcase to bring us back to 2019?" You question

"Well, it's a bit more complicated than that..." Five replies "Like I said I went and made a plan with the devil and I got this briefcase but it's programmed to bring me to a certain time and place and then back to Dallas."

"Why is it programmed like that?" Charlie questions as he approaches the two of you

"I have to go and kill the board of directors for the commission and she said she'll give me a briefcase to take us back to 2019 with everything as it should be and no apocalypses in any timeline." Five explains

"I have no clue what any of that means," Charlie replies

"It's alright, Charlie." You comfort before turning back to Five "Are you sure you can trust her on this?"

"I'm not sure but it's the only option we have to get out of here."

"Alright. I'm coming with you then."

"What do you mean?" Five questions

"I don't trust this woman one bit so there's no way I'm letting you do this alone." You explain before turning to Charlie "Charlie, I never knew when this would happen but it's time."

"Oh shit," Charlie exclaims

"Time for what?" Five questions

"THE plan." You say as you head over to your closet

Crouching down you push some boxes to the side before using one of your knives to unscrew the vent in the back. Reaching in you pull out a box before resetting everything to look normal. Grabbing the box you stand up and bring it over to your vanity table. Five and Charlie both make their way over to you and you start to explain the plan.

"Charlie and I came up with this plan a while ago in case I ever needed to sneak out unexpectedly. I knew you would come back so we set this all up in advance if I ever needed to leave to do something like this with you." You detail as you start to take stuff out of the box "I have a note that I'm going to put on the door that says I went to bed early and not to disturb me. The door will stay locked so no one can come in and if someone tries Charlie has time to prepare a story."

As you unpack some more items you quiz Charlie a bit about the plan. It had been about a year and a half since you came up with this thing so you wanted to make sure he still knew what to do.

"Typically the latest I get out of bed is 11 am so if I'm not back by then what should you do?"

"Take the note out of the box that says you left early to on a walk down the road and take my car saying I'm heading to find you. Then I'll drive off to town for the day and wait near a central location for you to come back." Charlie replies

"Correct." you state before adding "If anything else happens you have all the contingency plan materials in the box."

You take the note about going to bed early along with a piece of tape and unlock your door, hanging it up on the outside. Closing the door again you lock it and turn back to the boys. Five looks on with pride at you. You were so smart and always so prepared, but more so you were so sure of yourself that he would return for you that you had put plans in place to be able to leave on a moment's notice. You amazed him more each and every day and reminded him why he had done all the things he did and all the things he was doing now. Finished up with the box you turn to Charlie and state,

"Charlie I believe in you."

Charlie nods his head before wrapping you in a hug and replying,

"Come back soon."

"I will."

Stepping out of the hug, you turn to Five and extend your hand out towards him.

"Ready to follow me?" Five questions

"Always," you answer

With that Five takes your hand and in a flash of blue energy, the two of you travel away out of your room and through time to where you needed to go. When the energy flashed again you were in a completely different place. Steadying yourself you took a few deep breaths. Compared to the last time you time traveled the molecular disturbance didn't hurt as much. Maybe you were getting better at redistributing them. Even though you felt alright Five looked at you with concern. He held your hand a bit tighter and you could see the worried look in his eyes.

"Are you okay?" He questioned

"I'm alright darling. I'm getting better at managing molecular disturbances...I think." you explain

"That response does not fully fill me with confidence."

"That's too bad, we have a job to do." you remind

Five rolled his eyes at you. He didn't understand how could you just wave off the disturbance you felt like it was nothing, but you made a good point. You had a job to do and the quicker it was over with the better. Five pulled the note out of his pocket that had the place of where the board meeting was happening listed. Looking up at the building in front of the two of you, he confirmed that it was the place. Putting the note back in his pocket he took the briefcase and stashed it behind a large shrub on the backside of the building. With all of that done the two of you made your way to the front of the building. You looked around and saw many people in traditional clothing and the sound of polka music echoed from the building. Five grabbed the door and held it open for you to walk in with him following after. The two of you looked around the place checking to see if anyone out of the ordinary, commission-looking types, were around. You didn't see anything odd, except for the overwhelming amount of polka dancers inside the lodge. You follow Five as he walks over to a woman and says,

"Excuse me."

The woman turns to look at him and replies,

"Uff da. You snuck up on me there. If you're looking for the cookies, we don't put 'em out till 3:00."

"Ooh cookies," you exclaim

No. Wait. You had to focus on the task at hand. No cookies.

"We can hardly wait." Five comments "Uh, do you happen to know where the Midwest Soybean Society is meeting?

"Sure do. Muskellunge Banquet Room. You looking for your parents? They in for the convention?" The woman responds politely

Instead of answering her questions, Five looks off in the distance. You couldn't quite tell what he was looking at but the woman looked at the two of you for a response.

"Yes, our parents are prominent members of the society." you confidently lied

Five looked back towards the woman and held out a dollar before asking curiously,

"Hey, could I get some change?"

"Oh, sure, I'll just look in my purse." She says as she opens a fanny pack "Only a nickel and a couple of dimes. Oh! You... are...in... luck, mister."

The woman hands a few quarters to Five and he takes them in his hand. He looks off to the side as if he was deep in thought and says,

"You know some say the best luck is to die at the right time."

Five then walks off towards where the banquet room was as you and the woman both look on confused. The woman looks back to you and you shoot an apologetic look.

"Um...my boyfriend recently started taking a philosophy course at school. I'm trying to work with him on when it's appropriate to bring up philosophical statements."

The woman silently looks back at you confused and you walk away from her and follow your boyfriend. You can tell there's a shift in his body language as he walks towards the vending machine. He stood up straighter and his movements were stiff. He looked around before starting to place to coins he received in the vending machine. As he did so you approached him and stood by his side. You could see an angry and frustrated look on his face. You watched as he typed in the letter and number combo necessary to get a fudge Nutter Bar.

He loved those immensely. You were the one who introduced those to him when you got a bunch trick-or-treating on Halloween years ago. You knew he and his siblings wouldn't be able to go so you stole a bunch of candy to give to them and jumped over to their house later at night to distribute the sweets. You had given Five a Fudge Nutter bar to try first from the bag of candy and he became obsessed. He took the rest of them before his siblings even got a chance to try but you thought it was cute.

Coming out of your thoughts you notice your boyfriend getting frustrated at the machine. His eyebrows start to furrow and he tenses up more as he aggressively presses the buttons. He then tries to reach his hand through the vending machine door to try and get the bar he paid for out.

"Five what if I-" You start to say

You wanted to suggest using your powers but before you could fully get your words out your Five started to vigorously shake the machine.

"Come on!" He angrily exclaimed

"Uh- Five?" You try again

It is to no avail though as he steps back and starts to bang into the machine with his shoulder in his attempt to free his bar before shaking the machine again but harder. You knew your boyfriend was under an immense amount of stress given back-to-back apocalypses in about a two-week time frame and this stubborn Fudge Nutter was probably his breaking point. Now you knew you could step in and probably ease his tension with some love and compassion but you also had a weird curiosity to see what would happen. As he continued to shake the vending machine Five yelled,

"Stupid mother Fudge Nutter! Fuckin' Fudge Nutter!"

And taking a step back he kicked in the glass on the machine. Realizing what he did Five stopped and scratched the back of his neck. Taking a deep breath he turned towards the doorway which led to the banquet hall the board of directors was meeting in. Walking that way he dragged a finger across the side of a cake resting on a nearby table picking up some icing. You followed behind pulling out a knife and holding it in your hand preparing to fight. Five licked the icing off his finger before looking around and seeing an ax on the wall he grabs it and readjusts it in his hands. You could tell from the everything that he was displaying a high amount of frustration and although given the context it was an understandable expression of his feelings you knew it could lead to are more arduous killing process. You noticed as he started to prep himself to walk in the doorway that lead towards the hall but before he could step through you teleported yourself in front of him. Before he could react you grabbed his face tightly with your free hand pulled him into a forceful kiss. Pulling back and letting go of his face you watched as he blinked a few times in surprise.

"Oh- wow." He commented, "I was not against that in the slightest but um is there a reason?"

You twiddle with your knife as you reply,

"I thought that would be the best way to steady you. From my own experience kills are quicker and more effective if you have a steady balance between your erraticism and logic."

Although he kept a calm exterior, Five was screaming on the inside. His heart racing as if he had just run a marathon. Everything in his logic screamed that this was not the time to be feeling like this. The board that needed to be killed was just around the corner and the time was counting down to another apocalypse. And yet, every other part of said this was the time and screamed for more. Five collected himself and removed one of his hands from the ax to readjust his tie and jacket. Although alarm bells were still going off in his head a smirk appeared on his face as he suggested,

"Well, then I'll have to come to you for steadiness more often then."

Catching his drift, you take a step closer to him and use your free hand to grab him by his tie and pull him closer to you. A playful smirk resembling his own appears on your face as you whisper to him,

"Well how about this, the sooner we get this done and return to 2019 the sooner I'll provide you with some more...steadiness."

Everything screamed louder as a fire built within him. He was going to kill this board as if his life depended on it.

"I like that plan."

You let go of his tie and take a step out of the way of him. He raises his ax back up and prepares himself as you state,

"After you then mon chéri."

A wide smile appears on Five's face and there's a determination in his eyes as he walks through the doors and marches down towards the room that held the board of directors. You turned yourself invisible and followed after him. As Five steps through the door to the room, he can see AJ turn to look at him. There was something about seeing the people whom he both had worked with as a murderous pawn but also was left alone in the apocalypse for decades by that sent him into a rage.

"You!" AJ exclaims "Call security!"

A woman pushes her chair away from the table and towards a phone on a nearby desk. Five quickly takes a swing at her cutting her arm off. While still invisible you decided to turn her brain matter into liquid better her die quickly than slowly bleed out with a chance of survival. From the opposite side of the table, you see a man start to stand up to head towards Five but before he does so you throw your knives at him and land one through his eye socket into his brain and the other in his heart. Transporting yourself over to him you twist both knives in a circular motion ensuring lasting damage and no chance of survival. Revealing yourself you pull both knives out causing blood to splatter on your face and clothing. The board looks at you in shock and you turn to Five with a sadistic smile on your face and ask,

"What? You thought you could have all the fun without me?"

"Never, darling." Five replies, a twisted smile appearing on his own face

The two of you turn to look at the living members of the board for a moment but within seconds start jumping around the room taking board members out. Blood and carnage covered yourselves and the room as corpses were littered around the place. With the rest of the members taken out, you went to stand behind AJ while Five stood on the table in front of him. As you looked up at Five, ax in hand, and covered in blood, with a chaotic fire in his eyes you could not help how attracted you were to him at this moment. As Five towered over him, AJ questioned,

"She sent you, didn't she?"

"Does it really matter now?" Five replied

"Whatever she offered you, I will double it, triple it," AJ begged

"I'm not doing this for money." Five exclaimed as he lifted the ax to swing at AJ

Before the ax could connect with the fish tank of a head AJ had the lady from earlier tackled Five to the ground.

"Get off me!" Five yelled

"You're gonna pay for that vending machine, little mister." The lady said as she grappled with him

With the sudden action, you were pulled out of your thoughts and say AJ start to run away but also Five on the ground. As much as you wanted to help your boyfriend you knew getting AJ was better and ran after him. Having him in your sights you used your powers to make his legs denser, slowing him down followed by throwing knives into his thigh and shoulder.

Back on the board room Five continued to grapple with the lady.

"I don't wanna hurt you, all right?" Five tried to explain

The lady punches him in the face before angrily replying,

"Hurt me? Oh, I ain't afraid of you, you little pus ball."

Five was tired of dealing with the woman though and punched her back knocking her out cold. Getting up he takes a look around the room and sees that neither you nor AJ was in the room.

"Shit." He says aloud

Grabbing a rugby-looking paddle off the wall he flashed out of the room and flashes in front of AJ. As he does, he notices how slowly AJ is moving, as if his legs were made of concrete. Looking up he sees you leaning against a nearby wall nonchalantly eating a piece of cake. Looking over to him you say,

"Oh, hey babe. I saved him for ya."

You had never called him babe before and it was not helping him deal with the intense feeling of screaming going on within him and yet it also did. With that one word, he could feel a rush of adrenaline coursing through his veins. He felt...powerful. Cocking his head to the side he looked at AJ maniacally as he held the paddle in his hand.

"Surely we can come to some form of agreement that benefits both parties. Quid pro quo? What do you say?" AJ suggested

"Why not? Here's your quid." Five says hitting him in the side

"Here's your pro." Five adds catching him with the paddle in the knee

"No! No! Please don't!" 

"Here's your quo." Five stated firmly

Swinging hard he smashes the glass head that contained AJ in it leaving water and glass everywhere. Five takes a few deep breaths as he stares at the flopping fish on the floor. As he does so you see two girls in polka dresses walk out and see the scene before turning back into the dance hall. Placing your slice of cake down you summon all your knives back before heading over to Five and placing a hand on his arm grabbing his attention.

"We need to get out of here."

Five looks around at the scene and grabs a nearby plastic bag before picking AJ up off the ground and placing him in it. Five looks back to you and states,

"We need water."

You look at the air within the bag Five was holding and in a matter of seconds, you converted a portion of it into water. Five knew that was something you could do and it was something you had been able to do for a long time nevertheless, it still amazed him. Holding the bag with AJ in one hand he took yours in the other and held it tightly. Five spatial jumped the two of you out of the building and towards the shrub he had stashed the pre-programmed briefcase in. Handing AJ to you, he grabbed the briefcase and set it up so that you could get back to 1963 Dallas. Taking your hand once more you could feel the briefcase start to disturb the energy around you and with one more flash the two of you were back in the alleyway in Dallas covered in blood. The two of you looked around and everything seemed to be the right time and place. As you stood there in the alleyway the briefcase started to make noise and you could feel its molecules moving faster signifying that it was heating up. Grabbing it out of Five's hand you threw it on the other side of the alley and watch as seconds later it blew up. 

"What the fuck." You exclaimed

"Programmed to self-destruct after its purpose was done...clever." Five commented

You turn towards your boyfriend who seemed to be utterly unphased by the whole thing and say,

"I hate your former employer. I hope I never have to interact with them."

"Well, I don't want you to and because of that, I need you to go inside. She could be here any minute and I don't know what she could pull nor do I want you around her." Five explains "Also, it would make me feel better if you were inside. Okay?"

You nod your head at him and quickly make your way inside the back door to the building but don't head up the stairs to Elliott's apartment. Instead, you stay close to the door to be able to get to Five quickly incase he needed you.  Five crossed his arms as he turned away from the door and soon enough he heard the recognizable sound of heels clicking towards him.

"Well?" The voice asked

Five held to bag for her to take from him without looking back at her.

"AJ!" The handler exclaimed taking the bag

Five turned around and looked at her with an emotionless expression. 

"You know, you're really starting to fill out those tight little shorts of yours." The handler commented, "I'm sure your girlfriend is happy."

Five was always so disgusted when she talked about you. He could deal with comments made towards him, they meant nothing to him, but comments about you filled him with repulsion and rage. He kept quiet as he narrowed his eyes at her.

"Why so quiet? Thought you'd be buzzing after this morning's slaughter." She questions

Five looked off for a second. This killing, he didn't do it just because, he did it because he wanted to protect his family, you, and the world you all existed in.

"All this killing..." Five pauses "I'm done with it."

"What?" The handler questions "Am I supposed to take that seriously?"

"What I did today, I did for the people I love. I did it to save the world." Five elaborates emotionally

"Please. Spare me your little assassin with the heart of gold routine, will you?" The handler replies before picking up a briefcase from the ground "Here. Per our agreement, this will get you and your siblings back to 2019."

Five takes the briefcase from her and as he does she adds,

"You have 90 minutes."

Panic rushes through Five and as the handler starts to walk away he yells,

"You said nothing about a time limit."

"Actually, you have 89 minutes and 30 seconds. Better hurry."

"This is impossible, okay? My siblings are scattered across the city." Five exclaims as he approaches her

"Nothing's impossible. You proved that this morning when you killed the board."

"I need more time."

"Any more time, and people will start asking questions. The sooner you get home and out of this time period, the better off we'll both be, so, ticktock, ticktock." The handler finishes

Angrily, Five spatial jumps away from the handler and into the back staircase where you were. You look at him and see something is wrong but before you can say anything he grabs your wrist and spatial jumps the two of you up to the apartment. As the two of you arrive you see from the balcony three words written on the floor in blood. Öga För Öga. Eye for an eye? Before you can process that whole mess you hear Diego threaten from the kitchen,

"You killed one of ours, Olga, now we're coming after you. You will be dead by nightfall."

Five and you head towards the kitchen and see Diego on the phone with Luther nearby. As Five takes off his jacket and vest he explains,

"Hey. It's Öga För Öga, idiots. Swedish for an eye for an eye. It means the Swedes killed Elliott."

"Wrong number. Have a lovely day." Diego says in a chipper tone before hanging up the phone

Your eyes go wide as the situation before you triggers a strong feeling of deja vu within you, almost instantaneously followed by a strong visceral memory of your friends comes to mind. Quietly you whispered to yourself,

"Du sang pour du sang."

Five turns to look at you and asks,

"Why did you say blood for blood in french?"

"I'd love to explain but we do NOT have the time for it right now," you state

"Uh, you guys have some blood on you. A lot of blood, actually. What did you do?" Luther questions

Instead of looking to Five for answers, Diego comes over to you and starts looking you over for injuries.

"Are you okay? This is a lot of blood." He asks concerned

"I've said this many times before in my life but it's not my blood and that's all that matters." You respond to him

He looks at you confused as you walk away towards Five in the bathroom. Using your powers you specifically remove the molecules of blood on both of your clothes and skin before placing them all in the sink and washing them down. As both of you fix yourself up in the bathroom Five starts to explain, 

"So I found a way home."

"What? How?" Luther questions

"All the details are irrelevant, but...I made a deal to get back to our timeline."

"What about doomsday?" Diego asks

"Won't happen."

"And the 2019 apocalypse?" Luther inquires

Five was getting frustrated with his siblings. Their questions pestered him, especially because he killed a bunch of people for the opportunity to get everyone home safely and their time was running out fast.

"Everything will be back to normal. All right? Now, no more questions. We gotta go. We have to find the others, alright?"

Five walks out of the bathroom with you following behind him. 

"Yeah," Luther says

"Luther, you get Allison. Diego, Klaus. (Y/N) and I will get Vanya. Now, we meet back in the arrival alley in 77 minutes." Five details before heading over to a table and saying "Here. I've synchronized these watches."

Picking the watches up from the table he pockets one before handing the other two to each of his brothers.

"Okay, let's do this." Luther states

With Luther's confirmation, Five turns away from them and grabs your hand about to flash the two of you away but is halted when Diego questions,

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on. You show up with my sister completely drenched in blood and expect us to believe everything's gonna go back to normal if we go home now?"

You nodded your head a little bit at Diego's statement. If the handler had already tricked Five with a briefcase that has a 20-minute timer how could you know that this wasn't a trick again.

"Elliott just got killed because of us." Five exclaims gesturing to the body hidden underneath a sheet

You nodded your head once more because that was also a good point but you still did agree with what Diego had said.

"What about Dad? What about JFK?" Diego questions

Nevermind.

"Diego, we have a chance to go home and make things right. We are taking it." Five demands

This was wasting time, precious time that could be used to get back to their lives but also save the world.

"I have to say goodbye to Lila." Diego states

"Lila doesn't give a shit about you, Diego! She never did. She's one of them. She's a member of the Commission!" Five yells

"No way. Not possible."

Now you were starting to get frustrated with Diego. How could Diego be so stupid, so blinded by her? If she worked for the commission then she did not matter. She was bad from the start and deserved no sympathy for using your brother in the way she did. 

"She was just using you to get to me. You're the Oswald of this story, my friend. The goddamned patsy." Five frustratedly explains

"You don't know what you're talk-"  Diego to starts to retort

Five spatial jumps over to right in front of Diego and firmly states to him,

"If you don't do this, I'll kill you myself. Got it?"

"No. I don't take orders from you." Diego states back

That was it. You were done with the back and forth of bullshit as it was taking away time from the opportunity to get home. Pulling one of your knives out you quickly approached Diego and held it at him accusingly.

"Diego Hargreeves, this might be our only chance to get out of this god damn timeline and back home. And as your little sister if you care for my well-being as much as you say you do then you will not seek out this walking bag of lies and will go and get Klaus so we can all go home." You demand before exclaiming angrily "If you don't...I swear on our mother that I will take every one of your knives and will use them to dissect you limb by limb and organ by organ before using my powers to blow EACH ONE UP INDIVIDUALLY!"

The three boys looked on at you in horror. 

"Holy shit..." Luther quietly commented

"Do I make myself clear?" You ask

Diego quickly nodded his head and you pulled the knife away from them and back in its holding place on you. Turning around you walk away from him and extend your hand out to Five. Five takes it and the two of you flash away to outside the building. Looking around you and Five find a car that had the keys just placed on the driver's seat. Sharing a knowing look the two of you use your powers to get into the car before putting the keys in and speeding off to get Vanya. As you travel on the dirt roads leading to the farm Vanya was living on you started to head around a curve. As you did so you and Five looked over and saw Vanya in the car passing by. Vanya stopped her car as Five stopped yours. You both quickly rush out of the car and over towards Vanya who had gotten out of hers.

"What are you doing here?" Vanya questioned confused

"Looking for you. We're going back to 2019." Five states quickly

"What are you talking about?" Vanya asks 

Five pulls the watch out of his pocket and looks at the seconds counting down before replying,

"Look, I don't really have time to explain right now, but I found a way home. All right? We have 30 minutes to leave."

Five starts to walk away thinking Vanya would follow but instead she exclaims,

"What about my friends? I can't just leave them here."

"Vanya, you don't have a choice in this, all right? Doomsday will happen if you don't come with me." Five explains turning around to face her again

"Okay, then I'm bringing them with me." Vanya states

"They belong in this timeline." Five replies

"Says who? Sissy deserves a life where she doesn't have to pretend to be someone she's not. And Harlan There's a name for what he has. We can get him the help he needs." Vanya yells angrily

"Vanya." You called softly, trying to ease the tension

For a second, your calmness seems to work as Vanya adds,

"Look, a mom and her eight-year-old son are not gonna screw up the timeline, Five. They're insignificant."

Five looks on at Vanya and you can see behind the frustration and panic there was sadness in his eyes. He doesn't want to argue with his sibling and he never would purposely try to hurt his sibling in the way Vanya might be feeling, but they were running out of time to get home and if they didn't the whole world could end. Even in his panic, Five attempted to speak more calmly,

"No one is insignificant. I'm sorry, all right? But we can't take that risk. They have to stay. Come on."

"Why do you get to decide? You're the reason we're stuck here in the first place." Vanya rebukes, her anger returning

"If I did nothing, we would all be dead right now, thanks to you!" Five yells back

"They're coming with me." Vanya demands

Five could not deal with this stubbornness anymore. It was the same stubbornness that caused the last apocalypse because Vanya refused to see other people's perspectives and played the victim card time and time again. He loved his sister, that much was true, but he was not going to deal with another apocalypse just because Vanya wanted to bring some people she had known for a month along. Taking a step forward towards her Five stands his ground and firmly commands,

"Vanya, do not test me right now."

Vanya takes a step towards him in the same manner and in a low voice replies back,

"That's funny. 'Cause I was just about to say the same thing."

You can see the anger build between them but you can feel their power build as well. The disturbance they created crashed over you like a powerful wave during a storm. You tried to do what you always did to help ease the disturbance by breathing it in and then pushing it out. But this was different. Some time travel or explosions didn't do as much harm as they used to but Vanya's powers were like Kryptonite. And with the addition of Five revving up his powers, it was a bit more than you had been exposed to in a while. For a second you were able to manage pretty well but as they grew stronger it got harder to breathe. It was as if your throat was closing up on you and without being able to breathe the feeling of the disturbance got worse. You dropped to your knees as you gasped for air and when Five heard you struggling he immediately stopped his battle with Vanya to rush over to you. Helping you to stand, you took in deep breaths of air, and as Vanya powered down you started to feel better.

"I'm so sorry. Are you okay?" Five apologized as he pulled you into a hug

"I'm fine," you reply between breaths and you hold him back

From behind the two of you, you can hear Vanya say,

"Fine."

"Fine, what?" Five asks

Five pulls out of the hug to look at Vanya but keeps one of his arms tightly around you worried that if he lets go you'll collapse again.

"I'll be there, but I need to say goodbye first." Vanya answers

"Oh, Vanya, we don't have the time." Five explains

"Well, it's either that, or I'm not coming." Vanya states

Five looks towards you. There was no use fighting with Vanya on this and honestly, if he was in her place he'd want to say goodbye too. He never got the chance to say goodbye when he left. Looking back towards Vanya he nods his head and commands,

"The alley. 27 minutes. Don't be late."

With that Vanya goes and gets in her car while you and Five get in yours. Not letting go of you, Five walks you. to the car and helps you in it even as you protested saying you were feeling better. Turning the car back on Five whips it around and heads back towards the alley. When the two of you arrive you park the car and immediately jump out rushing towards the alley. As you arrive Five quickly opens up a dumpster and pulls out the briefcase he stashed there. Running from out of the apartment you see Luther approach you two and questions upset,

"Hey. Where is everyone?"

"You're the first." Five replies to him

"What?" Luther exclaims

"Yeah." You reply

As the three of you stare down the alleyway you can see Klaus approaching, which was surprising in and of itself but what was more surprising to you was that Ben was standing within him. As Klaus' body approached it exclaims,

"Hey! Hey! We made it!"

"What do you mean, we?" Five asks

The three of you then watch as Klaus contorts his body in odd ways and while Five and Luther were generally confined you were trying to process all that you were seeing. What looked like odd contortions to the other two was really Klaus trying to push Ben out of his body. Was Klaus possessed? You then watched as Klaus projectile vomited an extreme amount on the ground and along with it was Ben, who was now also covered in vomit. How did that work being a ghost? You didn't know and it wasn't important enough to ask at this moment. Klaus collapses to the ground and you look directly at Ben to say,

"I don't know what you did to cause that to happen, but it was gross as hell."

Luther, unknowing of Ben being there looks at Klaus. How is it that out of all his siblings Klaus was the one to arrive on time. An anger wells in him as he shouts,

"I can't believe it. I mean, you're here."

"We've got eight minutes left." Five states panicked as he looks at the watch

"I just had the strangest dream," Klaus mumbles from the ground 

"Where are the others!" Five exclaims as he continues to look down the alley

You continue to wait there and minute after minute the time ticks down until there were only sixty seconds left.

"We've got a minute left!" Luther yells angrily as he slams his hand down on the dumpster denting it

"What's going on, guys? Are we going somewhere?" Klaus asks from the ground

You watch as your boyfriend paces back and forth angrily ranting,

"It was a simple task. It was a simple task! All we had to do was be here. Didn't have to fight a giant sea monster, no. An army of mutants? Nein."

"I can't believe this." Luther comments

"It was handed to us on a silver platter." Five continues

This was bad. Allison, Diego, and Vanya had yet to show up and you couldn't leave with only five of you here. You shook your head as disappointment and anger flooded over you. This family would be the death of you.

"Could you just moan a little softer? My head is killing me." Klaus complains as he starts to sit up

"Listen to me, you useless puke bag, we just blew our chance to save the world!" Five yells

As he finishes saying that you can hear a sound coming from the briefcase but can also feel it as well. Five's head whips over to it and sees that the briefcase was about to go. 

"God damn it." Five states

"Shit," Luther adds

Five had no choice but to get rid of the briefcase. Picking it up off the ground he throws it into the air and far from any of you. You all watch as it disappears in a flash of blue and your chance of getting home had been lost to time. Five shakes his head and turns away from the group heading back towards Elliott's apartment.

"We were that close. That close." He states

You stared up at the spot where the briefcase had flashed and as the residual feeling of the disturbance, it caused disappeared faded you wondered if your chances of ever getting home had too.

 ________________________________

Taglist: @xplrreylo @joebob15274 @insatiable-ivy @fruitsaladtree @angelpeachamber @academy-umbrella @lizziel1410 @ir3neeee @faith-quake @aliens-with-colas @sunsetcurve-1995 @lady-celeste25 @im-dead-and-hurting @nerdypinupcrystal @cherry-ki-d @anapocalypseinmymind @vicassa @2cuteforyourlies @taylorsmakingfuckingmacandcheese @n1ghtsh4d3-67 @cheshire-salvatore-mikaelson @shadowycreationcupcake @emily-hargreeves @metor-showers1994 @fivehargreevesforthewin @rinko-san @supernovavision @cicilisthebest @flickbix @hi-v-juice @magykal-777 @zosiaduda @thethirdwheelfriend @mysticracoon @isnt-it-loverly @officiallydarkgeek @lady1505 @always-the-very-worst @tinypandagirl @libidinexx @lemongrabbuns @itwasallred @deadandoverit @shlokage @keksi249 @theoriginalkat @we-stan-fiction @bi-idiot-fanfics @annnagennnie @izzyjojo4 @megasimpleplan4ever @flowertoty @grabthemoneyandletsgo @itsametaphorbriansblog @vanillacaramelhoney @satvaldiva @disaster-magician @margotsfandoms @emily-b-m @bluechildrenlickmytoes @soft-slytherin-sweetie @oceanspray5 @im-here-for-fanfics @thebloodrobin @freestarlight @starcurrent @lilacs-lavender @moatsnow @give-the-boy-a-hug @narikyuwu @whenyouregrungeaff

#Umbrella Academy #The Umbrella Academy #five #number five #five headcanons #five hargreeves x reader #five hargreeves #tua five headcanons #tua five #tua five hargreeves #tua #tua fanfic #UA #the umbrella academy five

[nomadicauthor287]

Wild West AU

Sorry this took so long y’all! Enjoy! Be sure to like and reblog!

In the year of the force 1865, the great civil war came to a close. But with the end came a great cost, although the separatists lost, the republic lost as well with the mass execution of the generals for reasons of treason against the president. The republic was burned and a new order rose from the ashes. The Empire took over different territories claiming it was for peace but little by little it turned into tyranny.

Wrecker: Luther “Wrecker” Warner

Echo: Lewis “Echo” Sloan (Pair of revolvers)

Hunter: Bernard “Hunter” Spence (knives, knives, axes)

Crosshairs: Julius “Crosshairs” Spears

Tech: Irving “Tech” Bullock

Crosshairs is a Lieutenant Colonel in the Empire. A ruthless man is known for his remarkable marksmanship. Troops on both sides called him an angel of death because he just needed one shot to kill his target.

He rose through the ranks with his ruthless nature until he made his way up to Lieutenant Colonel.

But only a few people know about his one weakness. His little sister, Omega, is only 7 years old but smart as a whip and prodigy at strategy games.

Crosshair doesn’t trust anyone with his youngest sister. While he is an angel of death, she is an angel of life

Her brother tests her by challenging her to either chess matches and with hypothetical situations of battle with dioramas she made

Those tests were actually plans he uses to train his troops for battle

Also, battle strategies he uses

When Omega finds out what her strategies were made for battle and saw what happened to the systems after they swept through she was horrified

Lately, the Empire has been dealing with bandits that have been intercepting telegrams to steal supplies

Weapons

Food

Crosshair is tasked with the capture of these bandits

Some time passes and Omega makes a plan to escape

When she does escape her supplies and horse are immediately stolen once night falls

So she walks to town where she sells her headband given to her by her governess (Nala Se)

She walks into a local saloon and gets some grub

There was no other place to sit except next to this group of mercenaries talking about their next job

They question her why she’s sitting next to them and why she doesn’t move

She says she feels comfortable around them and the bespeckled fellow comments that that has never happened before

Their longhair leader questions her on why she’s here and where her parents are

She tells them she’s on a mission to save her people in the village she ran away from

She follows them to a saloon run by Cid

She’s one of the most successful women on that side of the West

They do jobs for ammo and supplies

She stows away on their wagon the next day when they go on a job

Wrecker is a wild man who loves nature and all her creatures

has a burro named Burrito

A Jackalope named Lula

Hunter is their big brother and leader of the group

Sometimes he doesn’t know what he’s doing

Echo is handicapped from the war but that doesn’t mean he can’t fight

He may not look it but he’s got plenty of fight left in him to find out what happened to his brother

Tech is the smartest and dumbest one out of all of them

He can tap into telegram lines as well as make all their equipment

The job they go on is to track someone who’s been kidnapping people

Zygerrians trying to bring slavery back

Omega makes herself useful and helps them recover the kidnapped people plus their target, Muchi

On that job she claims a bow from a boy who thanks her for saving him

Wrecker decided to let her stay with them

So they let Omega stay with them

Some time passes and Omega learns new skills from them

How to change a wheels

How to lasso creatures

Tap into telegram lines

Cook

Pan for gold

Next job they have to retrieve stolen resources

This time they enlist the help of the crew called the Green Phantoms

The Green Phantoms- (my OCs)

[I’ll do a character board soon]

10 members in all

They were an elite team made by a third party

They thought if kids with mystic powers were trained from infants they would be stronger

With training and surgical enhancements, it would make them stronger

They were said to be myths because there was no proof they existed because most targets associated with them were killed by “natural” causes or went missing

Luna Blade

Othed Dragoah

Verk Wress

Cam Tretey

Barux Rhitron

Ser Limser

Vonich Jhuc

Res Blonir

Ciara Blade

Koji

They track down the supplies to a remote part of the west in a canyon

They make Omega the lookout in case something goes wrong

There it’s rumored that there is a whole family of inbreds who ride on the backs of keeradaks

Once they have a visual on the supply cart they hold the Patriarch at gunpoint and tell him to bring out the rest of his family with their hands up

Turns out that wasn’t a good idea because his whole clan comes out

Someone fires a shot but it wasn’t anyone on the ground and the bantha pulling the wagon freaks out and runs

Tech and Ciara drive the cart while the others fight off the clan

The family chase them down on keeradaks

Some of the family board the cart and attack the drives until Hunter and Luna on horseback fought them off while the rest of the Green Phantoms fight off those on top of the cart

During all of this though Barux was negotiating moonshine prices with the matriarch

Rango - Water chase

The family starts tossing dynamite at them

Then Koji gets lasso’d off the wagon which helps her board and then rides the keeradak

Towards the end of the line, someone shoots one of the wheels off of the wagon and it comes to a stop

Turns out the cart was a trap and was full of imperial soldiers

All of them are captured and are put under arrest by order of Lieutenant Colonel Julius Spears or Crosshair

He beats both Luna and Hunter for the location of his sister

“Is this any way to treat your brother Julius!” Luna spat

Omega who was hiding in the distance with Burrito

“Brother?” she questions

She was shocked that the men who took her in were actually her brothers

Luna causes a distraction that lets Hunter, Tech, Echo, Wrecker, and Ciara escape with Omega

They all run away to a ranch run by their friend Cut where they hideout for a few days

End of part 1?

@soundwavetherav @zaffur @echoy-naak @eyecandyeoz @dreamy-day-daze @kratosfan6632466 @agentmarymargaretskitz @itsjml

#bad batch #i did a thing #clone trooper crosshair #clone trooper tech #clone trooper wrecker #clone trooper hunter #clone trooper echo #bb theme headcannons #ocs #wild west au

[in-tua-deep]

Oooooo the red bock au sounds so interesting! Does Five caught himself thinking of his brothers just as numbers and weapons like Reginald talks in his book? Does he read Vanya book to remind himself that they are still human even though he reads it through lens of someone hurt by them all? And I feel like the handler would know either way about the books but o it's so much fun to see five being paranoid

I think having both books and both perspectives reminds Five that... he’s getting some very biased accounts of his own siblings. I think that when he’s still young, he writes down as many memories as he can remember because... he starts to forget, at some point. 

Vanya’s book talks about how volatile Diego and Luther’s relationship is, and so Five writes down the time Luther and Diego teamed up to toss Five off a balcony when Five kept switching the pens in their hands with pipe cleaners during a lesson (and he will maintain until his dying day that he was just practicing his control, c’mon guys!)

when Reginald’s notes call Allison an “insufferable, narcissistic creature,” Five remembers Allison bribing him to cause trouble and distract Reginald so that she could use the microwave unobserved to heat up some water bottles as makeshift heat packs for Luther’s sore muscles

when Vanya calls Ben “easily manipulated,” Five recalls Ben arguing theories with him at 2am after one of Ben’s training sessions where Ben almost flipped his bed when Five jokingly suggested that he could use the horror’s tentacles to bounce up and down like a pogo stick before Ben tackled him and tried to beat Five to death with an encyclopedia of sea creatures (affectionately)

I think having Reginald’s journal actually helps in a lot of ways, because Five automatically autocorrects literally all of Reginald’s thoughts to be like, mostly inaccurate and much harsher than they need to be. So when he reads Vanya’s journal he also autocorrects and is able to recognize that it is a very biased and somewhat harsh view of his siblings

(he doesn’t distrust them as much as he does in canon, with only Vanya’s harsh words to cling to with no reminder that they were all raised by a man capable of unfathomable cruelty, no reminder that authors can be oh so biased)

outside of his equations, there’s notes to himself written in the margins of Vanya’s book. Sometimes they’re just small, pointing out that Klaus had fought to include Vanya in trap week (Klaus then proceeded to team up with her and managed to catch Five in a snare - he actually still has a scar around his ankle from his upsidedown thrashing before he managed to steal one of Diego’s knives to cut himself down) or pointing out that Luther’s chilly attitude when they were ten was probably the result of Vanya outperforming him in every standardized test they took because of Luther’s ridiculous inferiority-superiority complex

at the very least he has comparison, because Reginald’s book calls Klaus an absolute failure while Vanya’s book called him “sweet, as a child at least”

As for the Handler... she’s aware that he has Vanya’s book and a red notebook, but I don’t think she actually knows what’s in the red notebook! Reginald was notoriously secretive, after all

So the Handler assumes that the red notebook is where Five keeps his time travel equations because aw, he hasn’t given up! how cute!

She makes an assumption that, logically, makes sense. Of course Five is still trying to figure out time travel, no matter how much he denies it! Of course he’s writing the equations down! What a silly boy, thinking that he could hide this from her, of course she knows about his little plans to save his siblings ;3c

And because she’s so powerful and knowledgeable and one step ahead all the time, she makes an assumption and assumes that it is fact. Because she’s so smart, of course she isn’t wrong! She’s had Five clocked from day one!

(The Handler thinks she has Five all figured out, a creature so based in sentiment. Why would he carry a book around that details the torture his siblings went through? He hates his father, why would he ever carry around his father’s notebook! The Handler has a fatal flaw, and it is that she doesn’t understand loyalty and sneers at sentiment and those are two of Five’s most powerful driving factors. Five lives for his siblings and would die for his siblings, almost his entire life has been dedicated to saving them. Not the world, just his family.) 

(She understands that Five considers his family to be exceptionally valuable, but doesn’t comprehend that Five is 100% willing to die for them should it come down to it. Why on earth would anyone value something like siblings over their own life? Absurd. I genuinely believe that the Handler thinks she could get Five to betray his siblings with the right leverage, and so she fundamentally does not understand Five as a person)

To be fair to the Handler, the whole academy’s morals and just. completely and utterly fucked. Luther condemns the murder of innocent civilians even if it would save the planet but doesn’t blink an eye at killing the ‘bad guy’ Commission agents. Diego stabs criminals as a pastime while still holding himself at a moral high ground for saving people, despite the fact that too many criminals are forced into crime by unfair circumstances. Allison used her powers to bolster her career without even blinking but now refuses to use her powers at all because of the manipulation of one (1) child, not even against ‘bad guys.’ 

I mean. Vanya wrote an entire salt book without consulting her siblings that had lasting impacts on at least one of her sibling’s career in the public eye and potentially impacting her siblings relationships with everyone who had every read the spark notes on her book, without the opportunity for reprisal. Publishing your entire family’s dirty laundry as personal emotional catharsis is... kind of a dick mood, lets be real. Especially when you were all abused children raised in an environment of excessive violence and rigid structure. 

Like yeah, of course Allison is good at manipulation and lying - she grew up with an abusive and over-controlling father. She probably lied as easily as breathing about where she’d been, who she was with, what she was doing, etc. The only privacy they got in that household was what they seized with their own hands and carved out for themselves! Is it fair to say that Allison’s superpower is dishonestly?

Is it fair to say that Klaus got crueler as he grew? He was tortured and turned to drugs as an unhealthy coping mechanism, and then he sat down at a table and looked at all the other little kiddies who did not get locked into a crypt overnight. In fact, there was one child who never got any extra training at all! Can you imagine the jealousy? The bitterness? Klaus might have been exceptionally cruel to Vanya as a teenager, she had everything he wanted and dared to complain about it. Can you imagine listening to someone wistfully wish they could join in on missions when you know that the cost for doing so has been carved out of your soul?

My point is, none of these little bitches have anything that resembles a sane moral compass. They’re unpredictable as fuck! It’s like herding cats! You never know what they’re going to do next! Oh? Are they going to investigate in any logical pattern? No, because Diego just remembered Patch exists and helping her print flyers for the annual police ball is more important than saving the world or whatever lol

Luther is over there investigating the moon! The moon! Meanwhile Allison is breaking and entering her sister’s student’s house because she got shady vibes off of him one time and she has never heard of a proportionate action in her life. 

Meanwhile Vanya is going through the phone book trying to call up psychiatrists who have any familiarity with whatever fucked up meds Dad put her on because like, she would like to Not Be On Them (fuck you dad) but also understands that danger of quitting cold turkey something you have been taking for years and would like a professional opinion on how to safely decrease and eventually eliminate her usage, thanks (Klaus is hanging over her shoulder pointing out the ones who will sell you non-prescription drugs for a price and Vanya mentally crosses those ones off of her list to call)

Five is probably joining on the breaking and entering because Allison promised she would sweet talk to eye dude if he did her this solid 

(Five complains at length about how investigating the apocalypse should not be a solid because she would 100% die as well if the apocalypse came to pass)

#the red book au #plus like. some thoughts and opinions lmao #look Vanya's book was healing and cathartic for her #does that mean it should have been published? #FUCK NO #it's biased as all fuck for starters and could genuinely impact her siblings jobs and relationships #anyway the hargreeves are all cats #they do their own thing regardless of what they should be doing #their orders of priorities are fucked tbh #what do you mean vanya's job isn't equally as important as saving the world? #she has to pay rent somehow five !! #klaus is down to go threaten a seedy dude but can they investigate dad's will after pretty please? #maybe there's a clue! or numbers about inheritance! #if dad disowned them then diego is forging the will tbh #not because he wants the bastard's money but it's the PRINCIPLE of the thing #Anonymous #long post #far tua long

[alexiethymia]

just five things

I am perhaps overanalyzing, but what the heck.

Underrated Five and Allison moments, because the whole fandom knows if they properly teamed up no one would survive. Allison is the only semi-functional adult in that lot. Five...is the farthest thing from functional, but at least he's driven and doesn't get distracted. Anyway, when he said he wanted to live long enough to meet Claire. Either Claire was mentioned in Vanya's book or he actually took the initiative to find out her name. Their combined snarking towards Diego. He was the one to stem the blood from her throat. The way he was as eager as the rest of the brothers to donate blood. Luther and Klaus are givens. Deigo is too, but Five was interesting to me. We know he loves his family, but he's also pragmatic and practical, and yet the way he said 'I will', he seemed just like a boy rather than a weary old man.

Five and Guilt. Although he doesn't show it, it's pretty obvious to the audience that he feels an immense amount of guilt towards his family. Is it guilt for leaving? Does he think that him jumping contributed to the apocalypse? And then there was the fiasco of them jumping back, even though that was the only choice at the time. He never blames Vanya for the apocalypse, and yet when she alludes to it being his fault they're in the 60's, he loses control and lashes back. Even as he grumbles, I think it's that guilt that makes him so driven to save his family. I mean we know he's obsessed with the apocalypse, but to him stopping the apocalypse equals saving his family. So he's actually obsessed with the latter. In fact he makes his priorities clear actually, 'I did what I did today to save my family, and to save the world.' Saving the world comes second for him I think. Even as he snarks and insults his siblings, there's always that hefty feeling of guilt and duty towards them. That's always been so fascinating to me about his character.

The Handler thinks he's just like her, cold and prgamatic, but when it comes down to it, he's not pragmatic at all. Sure, his means may be practical, but his priorities and core is emotional. Again, that's just amazing to me. He had a chance of a semblance of a normal life with the Commission. He'd never have to face the apocalypse if he was out of time. In addition, the Handler even offered him a chance to return to his original body AND his family's safety. But again he doesn't even think about it, doesn't even consider it, doesn't even trust the Handler to ensure the safety of his family in exchange for lifelong servitude. He begins plotting immediately how to use the opportunity to his advantage and get back. So again, I think it's more than just his family's safety or his personal safety. For all his griping, he'd rather return to them and work out a solution together. Given a choice of sacrificing himself to ensure his family's safety, he chooses and wants to be with them still. Not a pragmatic choice at all.

But it's not just duty at all. That scene with Vanya and everyone in the car makes that clear. Vanya says he doesn't have to, and Five says I know, meaning he knows he doesn't have to, but he wants to help, acknowledging that for all he says he feels like a hostage (of familial love maybe), he saves and helps his family not because he has to, but because he wants to.

I always wondered, if the Handler gave him the choice to keep his family safe by employing them at the Commission and taking them out of time, would he accept? If given the choice of the fate of billions and his six siblings, which would he ultimately choose? I always wondered. But ultimately, I think no. He wouldn't want them to end up like he did. And he wouldn't want them to have to leave their loved ones either, like he did. So again, saving the world and stopping the apocalypse drives Five, because it means saving what's precious to him, his family, but also saving what's precious to them.

#tua #the umbrella academy #five #five hargreeves #hargreeves #the hargreeves #tua meta #character analysis #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #ben hargreeves #vanya hargreeves #we stan one gremlin old man child who loves his family #ramblings about tua

[shirtlesssammy]

1x20: Dead Man's Blood

Guys! We really wanted to save this VERY SPECIAL episode until the end, but it’s just SO special we couldn’t wait. It’s the episode that all mythology of the show balances on --John being a deadbeat on his own hunts, JENNY!!, and vampires (aka, the one thing Dean can’t kill and also something this family has never run into before so, you know, John could HAVE never described masked ones in his journal)

Fun fact: Jenny isn’t actually named in this episode (because woman don’t matter enough to name, silly!) Giving this character a name is the slowest burn storyline this entire show had!

Then:

John Winchester: Father of the Decade

Now:

Manning, Colorado

Mr. Elkins sits at a bar, pouring over his hunter journal. Some rowdy newcomers appear. 

Mr. Elkins takes off for home --a run down cabin in the woods. One of the bar newcomers is waiting for him. Her eyes flash and he throws a knife into her torso. She pulls it out without issue and chases him. He runs to his safe and pulls out the Colt (do we know about the Colt yet? Whatever, spoiler!) but it’s too late, he’s attacked by a couple of other dudes that fly in from the ceiling. Dinner time for the monsters!

At a diner, Dean suggests they head east to find Sarah Blake again. 

Sam dismisses such foolishness (because the idea of Sam ending up happy with a woman that we know and like is pure nonsense!!) and mentions the death of Daniel Elkins. Dean remembers that name from John’s journal. ‘

The brothers head to Colorado and check out Elkins’ home. Dean finds Elkins’ journal. 

They also find the place torn apart --and weird scratches on the floor. Dean takes a rubbing and realizes that it’s a message for a post box. They head there next and find a note for ‘JW’ in the box. 

Before they can open the letter, good ol’ John Winchester appears. He tells them that he saw them at Daniel’s place. Sam asks why he didn’t come in. “You know why. Because I had to make sure you weren't followed.” LISTEN, asshole, these two brothers are doing JUST FINE without you. 

John tells the boys that he knew Daniel, but they had a falling out (Jesus, who didn’t you fight with back in the day, John?) John reads Daniel’s letter to him.

John asks if they saw a gun at Elkins’ place. Nope. John rushes out insistent on catching the things that killed Elkins. Sam and Dean ask what they are. 

Vampires!

Sam and Dean are shocked that they’re real. John goes over the lore for this show. 

We watch the vamps hunt for dinner. A couple is stopped by a body in the road, and while the dude goes to check it out, the woman calls 911. The dude doesn’t last long (and the lady probably doesn’t either.) 

John hears the news on the police scanner. Without explanation, he tells his sons to follow him to find the vamps. John confirms that they’re on the right trail for the vampires but Sam wants proof. 

He found a fang. They head out --but not before John gets a dig into Dean about how he takes care of his car. 

While driving, Sam and Dean break down their mutual feelings about having John back. Dean’s the little soldier and Sam is not. (And Sam is driving, like Dean can’t even be in control and drive the car he loves so much because he can’t truly handle his father’s overbearing abuse?)

At an abandoned barn, the vamps party it up while the couple stay tied up and freaking out about their fate. Then the Keifer Sutherland of the group arrives, giving them permission to feed on the dude. 

Kate tells Luther about Daniel Elkins, and he gets upset. More people will track them now. He then sees the Colt. “This is no ordinary gun.” 

On the road, Dean tells Sam to pull over because John said so. Sam gets pissy and has a little drag race with pops. And that’s the last time Sam ever drove the Impala. Sam gets in John’s grill about the gun and what they’re doing. 

Dean tries to play peacemaker, but it is REALLY TOUGH with these two. John accuses Sam of leaving. Sam accuses John of shutting him out. Dean just wants a HAPPY FAMILY. 

Kate and Luther attack the lone surviving victim, Jenny, feeding her Kate’s blood. Somebody wrote on Tumblr recently about this scene and I had blocked it out. Pretty sure I’ve only seen this episode a few times and BELIEVE IT OR NOT Jenny’s fate just did not stick with me. I’d forgotten how highly sexualized they’d made this vampire scene, and then gone further and draped it in assault. Jenny “dies” terrified, victim of one of the few same-sex kisses (on screen) in this entire damn show. Excuse me while I stomp around for a while rending my hair and hurling curses!

Later outside the vampires’ lair, the Winchesters surveil the place. Vamps CAN walk in the sunshine and they do NOT sparkle. John reveals his intricate plan: just...walk into the barn while they’re asleep.

For Still Beautiful, Still Dean Winchester Science:

John fills them in FINALLY on the Colt. Samuel Colt made a gun on the same night as the Battle of the Alamo. Sorry. Just. This is such a random story detail that has literally nothing to do with the Colt? Anyway, Colt made the gun for a hunter and gave him thirteen bullets. The hunter disappeared with only half the bullets used up because the FIRST RULE of the elder wand - I mean, the Colt - is never to brag about the Colt, probably. 

The kicker is that the Colt can purportedly kill anything! Like bigfoot! Or God! Or the legendary, rumored-to-be-extinct vampire! (Or, sure, the demon that killed Mary Winchester.) John is hinging their demon-killing success on getting the Colt. The potential vampire killing is just blood-red icing on the cake. 

In the barn, John creeps up slowly on the sleeping Kate and Luther, eyes set on the Colt dangling on their bedpost. Meanwhile, Sam and Dean stop their search for the Colt when they realize that there are people trapped for food in the barn. (Good beans!) They work to set them free when Jenny wakes up. She immediately lets out an inhuman roar as soon as she sees Sam.

Luther wakes up and chucks John across the room. He shouts for them to split, and the Winchesters flee. “Once a vampire gets your scent, it’s for life,” John explains. [insert Benny/Dean joke here] 

While Dean’s raiding a funeral home, John “bonds” with Sam in the motel. He reveals that he put $100 in a college fund for Sam and Dean when they were born. He did that up until Mary died, and then he shifted his focus to raising his boys to be soldiers. (So literally just $100 for Sam’s account, then.) “Somewhere along the line I stopped being your father.” NO SHIT, JOHN. 

Sam tells John that he used to think they were different, but after Jess died he’s wholly in the fight. They bond over their twin quests for revenge and when John reveals that he spent his boys’ college funds on ammunition, Sam laughs. What a Hallmark moment! Dean returns with dead man’s blood, and they get to work.

That night, Dean gets dangled out as bait: the dude-in-distress bending over a “broken-down” Impala. I just. Can’t even. With this show. 

Kate finds him and they trade witty banter. She also kisses him which…. Excuse me, I’m going to stare into the middle distance for a while, grinding my teeth. 

Arrows thwack into the vampires’ chests just in time, I guess? The dead-man’s-blood soaked arrows start to leach into their system, slowing them down. The Winchesters capture Kate, and kill the second vampire. 

Sam confronts John about his plan to get the Colt and then scuttle away from his sons again. “You can’t treat us like this. Like children.” 

“That’s crap,” Dean calls out John. “You know what Sammy and I have been hunting. Hell, you sent us on a few hunting trips yourself. You can’t be that worried about keeping us safe.” John’s got to do the hunt ALONE! It’s the only way! 

Back with the vamp family, Luther learns about the hunters who’ve captured Kate (and severed their first head). 

Luther zeroes in on John’s truck, tearing down the highway. He can tell that Kate’s inside it. And sure enough, Kate starts to wake up next to John. The vamp squad pursues the truck. 

At the barn, Sam and Dean break in to confront the lone, possibly drunk vampire. It’s time to go antiquing! ALSO Dean Winchester breaks out the blood prisoners. “I told you I’d come back!” Readers, I love him.

With the vamps, John demands a trade: the Colt for Kate. He almost gets the Colt, but Kate overpowers him, knocking him out. It looks like the end for John Winchester EXCEPT an arrow thwacks into a vampire out of nowhere. Cue triumphant music, for it’s Sam and Dean Winchester to the rescue! Sam gets captured in the fight, and John blows one of the Colt’s precious bullets right into Luther’s forehead. The vampire dies in slow motion dramatic glorious fashion.

Jenny takes off to - APPARENTLY - live on in infamy on the back end of the show. John tells his kids that they are, in fact, stronger as a family. It’s time to hunt the demon together! Aw, bonding time! 

Buffy the Vampquote Slayer:

Vampires? I thought there was no such thing

Revenge isn't worth much if you end up dead

We’re stronger as a family

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive! 

#spn recap #dean winchester #sam winchester #john winchester #JENNY #spn 1x20 #dean man's blood #supernatural season 1

[twoidiotwriters1]

Lost time (Diego Hargreeves x Fem!Reader

A/N:  In honor of the premiere of the second season of Umbrella Academy  we have something ... I don't know, I just wanted to write and share this hahaha. I hope you like it- Val

Words: 2,765

"Why is it so difficult for you to admit that you’re still in love with him?" Allison asks with a funny smile.

"Because that, dear friend, would be lying,” I point out sitting down in front of her on the bed. She laughs.

"Oh come on Y/ N, we’re no longer thirteen, when you blushed every time someone said his name,” She scoffs and I roll my eyes.

"It was just a stupid teenage crush, Al," I sigh. "And what about you?" I argue back.

"Me what?" She says nervously.

"Where's Luther?"

"No, don't try to change the subject, you cheater–”

I laugh and shake my head.

"That song is already over, I don't feel anything for Diego, at least not like I used to.”

I lie in bed and sigh as I remember when we were 13 years old.

The boys at Umbrella Academy were very famous, all my classmates knew about them from the comics and the news, but nobody knew them in person, only me. Living close to the academy, I could hear how they laughed, played or trained.

Right on their thirteenth birthday, Allison, Klaus, Diego, and Five planned to leave the academy without their father knowing. That day I met them.

The four of them entered my parents' shop, a well-known bakery. That afternoon I was helping out at the cash register. Allison was very kind, Klaus looked adoringly at the cookie decorations on the counter, Diego stuttered when he saw me, and Five looked around him in detail.

To their bad luck, some children recognized them before I could give them their order. Without realizing it, the store was already full of guys asking for their autographs. My father had to get them out and try to control the situation, while I guided them to the back of the store. My father didn’t have the best attitude and knew he wouldn’t help them.

I knew all the streets in the neighborhood by heart, so it was easy to lose the crowd. On the way back to the academy, I got to know them better. Allison and I connected quickly, I was amused by Klaus's funny comments, Five's sarcastic attitude and I was touched by Diego's shyness, which changed when he had more confidence.

Later, I picked up his order and went to the academy to deliver it with a small note, which I hid very well.

'I hope to see you soon.’

"Girls," says Luther, entering Allison's room. I sit up in bed watching the big man's worried expression.

"What's going on?" Allison asks.

"We can't find Klaus.”

"Again?" I raise an eyebrow. Klaus was clearly not a person standing still. "Surely he’s with his dealer, or in a club.”

Luther shakes his head. "Five already looked for him everywhere and nobody has seen him.”

I sigh and get out of bed, and the three of us walk out of the big Hargreeves Mansion, across from Allison's car. Five appears next to me, scaring me a little. I can never get used to his teleportation power.

"Any clues?"

"We just have to search the streets" answers Allison.

"Look at you, worried about your little brother," I say to Five with a laugh and he rolls his eyes.

"If he's just taking drugs, I'll kill him," He replies and then gets in the car. I follow him in the back, Allison drives and Luther is co-pilot.

We searched for Klaus for several hours, but we couldn't find anything. We asked some people, but we're just wasting time, until my phone rings. A message from Vania.

‘I found Klaus, but I need your help.’

Then she sends me his location and I give it to Allison.

When we arrived at the place, the sun was already setting. We all get out of the car and see Vanya on the sidewalk.

"And well?" Five asks her.

"They saw him come in there," she says, pointing to the end of an alley behind her.

We looked out, everything was dark and you could only see a white door at the end, but everything made sense when feeling the vibration of the music.

“Great."

"How did you know it's here?"

"My contacts saw it," says another voice.

Diego comes out of the shadows looking at us with a smug smile. At that I feel a slight push to my right.

"Shut up,” I whisper to Allison, although I also say it to my heart, which is beating so harshly I fear will be heard by the others.

Diego fixes his gaze on me, but I lower my head avoiding his eyes.

"I guess I will have to kill him," adds Five.

Luther opens the great door to the club. I narrow my eyes when the colored lights hit my face, but even as I get used to the change, my eyes can't believe that so many people are gathered in this place. Finding Klaus won't be easy.

"We better split up," says Luther, looking at us. "Allison, you will come with me on the right, Five and Vanya in the center, Diego and Y/N, you on the right," before anyone could reply, Luther enters followed by Allison.

"Stay close," Diego whispers in my ear, causing a chill throughout my body, I ignore my reaction and follow him.

It’s difficult to walk among so many people and on several occasions I almost lose sight of Diego, until a huge man staggers behind me and hits my foot, causing me to trip, but before I could fall, Diego's strong arms hold me.

"You're good?" He yells at me above the music. His arm wraps around my waist and his other hand touches my cheek. I nod and pull away from his grasp feeling my cheeks burn. I hope the lights hide it. Diego smiles sideways when he notices but says nothing.

He turns to continue, but not before taking my hand tightly. Unable to avoid a smile, I intertwine our fingers and walk close to him.

For a few minutes we could only walk aimlessly, until I fixed my eyes on the bar to my left. A slim man with tattoos, a skirt and a colorful shirt is dancing on the bar.

I stop and give Diego's hand a squeeze, he turns and I point to the highly drugged Klaus. As we get closer we notice that around Klaus, a group of people are making fun of him and clapping for him to continue dancing. The boy doesn't seem to be aware of this and follows the rhythm of the music until he sees us and smiles.

With difficulty he kneels on the wood of the bar.

"Guys! You’re finally together!” He shouts, pointing at our clasped hands, I follow his gaze and when Diego and I realize what he's talking about, we all jump apart. Klaus laughs and raises his arms. "Long live love!"

"Klaus, come on, get down from there,” I say approaching. He laughs again.

"Come with me, Y/N. it's so much fun here.”

"Get down from there, brother. Before you break your neck,” Diego repeats when he sees Klaus wobble a little.

"I don't want to,” He pouts and returns to me. "Tell your boyfriend not to be bossy.” I roll my eyes.

"Hey," says another thicker voice. A huge guy -perhaps the size of Luther- approaches us. His tattooed arms tighten on his chest. "You can't take our big star," he says mockingly.

"Uh, sir… Sorry, but we have to,” I say as kindly as I can, ignoring the fear in my voice.

The man steps forward and I step back. Who wouldn’t? This guy can break me in seconds and use me as a stick.

"Wow, stop there, King Kong,” says Diego standing in front of me. "Your star has to go. He's my brother, not a stunt.”

I walk away a little, letting Diego distract the mastodon and return to Klaus.

“Klausy, darling, please come down from there.”

"But I’m having fun!”

I growl at his childish attitude, I know this may take time and Klaus will either stay the same or try to run away. I look to my right and now the big guy wants to face Diego.

“Shit," in that an idea comes to me. “Klaus!” I called out to him and he watches me as he drinks from his glass -which I didn't know he had- "I promise as soon as we get home, I'll make you waffles!" His eyes lit up. Bingo.

"The ones I love?"

“Until you can't eat anymore, but please get down from there. We have to go.”

He nods and staggers off the bar. He puts his arm around my shoulders and part of his weight falls on me.

"And what will you do about it, pretty boy?" I hear that the man, still talking with Diego.

"Oh, I'll show you," He replies, pulling a knife from his harness. With Klaus on me I drag him towards them.

"Hey, we don't have to go on with this fight!” They both stop, but they don't take their eyes off each other. "Come on, uh, huge man,” I continue nervously. "You don't want to dirty your... nice tattoos with this boy's blood!" It seems that it distracts them and now they watch me.

"What are you saying, girl?"

I push Klaus a little to cix his posture, who is still in his own world. “Please, it shows that you’re a– uh… professional, and surely you have had a hard week. You came here to have fun, not to destroy the body of a boy in disguise.”

I know my words are going to bother Diego, but now I'm only interested in leaving here with the two brothers. The guy observes Diego's outfit and laughs out loud.

"You may be right, girl.”

"Sure I am," I laugh nervously. "Just look at it, who wears a harness and leather these days?" The man laughs again and turns around, surely to mock him with his friends, but I take this as an opportunity to walk away. I see Diego, who is frowning.

“Diego," I call him and he looks at me. "Come on," I wave to him and he nods, taking Klaus's body from my shoulders.

The three of us walk towards the exit without looking back. I sigh in relief as I feel the fresh air in my face.

"That was close."

"What a fun night, we should repeat it, Diego,” says Klaus looking towards a wall. I look at Diego and he stares blankly.

“Diego?”

The presence of the others distract us. Allison hugs Klaus, Luther and Vanya scolds him and Five threatens him with death... again.

"Hey, stop yelling at me!” He pouts and turns to see me. "Can we eat Waffles now? You promised.”

It seems that this caught the attention of others and I tell them what happened - omitting Diego's humiliation. They laugh, but all like the idea of ​​waffles.

We divided ourselves between Allison's car and Diego's and we all returned to the academy. As soon as we arrive, we go to the kitchen -except Diego- who goes up to his old room.

Grace helps me make dessert and we all eat happily. The Hargreeves siblings tell stories, joke and quarrel from time to time, but I can't stop thinking about what happened at the club. When I think no one notices, I get up, put two waffles on a plate and leave the kitchen.

I climb the stairs and stop outside Diego's room. I knock on his door and wait. When I don't get an answer I decide to enter, finding the room empty. I sigh and put the plate on the nightstand, I go into the small place, but the sound of the door makes me jump.

I turn and see Diego shirtless and his hair wet. For a moment, my words get stuck in my throat.

“Can I help you?" Normally he would make fun of me, but his tone is sharp and annoyed. He walks to his closet ignoring me.

"Diego, what I said at the club–”

"You would’ve told me before, I know that," he growls without looking at me.

 My heart shrinks when listening to it, it's been a while since I heard it. I work very hard to avoid it.

"No, that's not what I meant."

He turns and confronts me with his arms crossed.

"I don't want to know, Y/N.”

"Everything I said is not true, Diego. I only said it so that the man wouldn't hurt us, it wasn't my intention to hurt you.”

He snorts and comes closer.

"You didn’t do it.”

"I like your costume,” I feel my cheeks burn. "although it’s a little strange, but…”

"But?" The anger disappears from his face. I roll my eyes.

"I said those things so the man wouldn't kill us, okay? You don't have to get upset,” I cross my arms. He laughs and I look at him confused. “What?"

"I didn't remember how easy it was to make you blush,” ​​I blush. Again.

“Classic, first you get mad at me and now you make tease, you’ve always been like this, since we were children.”

“You haven’t changed either. Always getting us out of trouble, when in reality we’re the biggest problem.” We both laugh.

"They keep me busy," I shrug. Diego goes to a wardrobe and takes out a black shirt and then puts it on. I almost pout. Almost.

"You know? When we were kids I had a huge crush on you,” He says, turning his back on me. And while he searches among his things I am having a breakdown.

"What?"

"Yes" He chuckles. "I thought you were pretty and you always supported us in our adventures, but that was a long time ago…”

What? He liked me? I can't believe Allison was right, that she's always been right.

“A-And now?" I ask approaching him.

"What?" He turns around and jumps a little at the proximity.

"Do you have feelings for me now?"

I look directly into his eyes and see a cute blush on his cheeks.

"Uh, I don’t– I don't know.”

“Where’s that confidence of yours, Diego?" I smirk and he smiles. "I had a crush on you too," I whisper.

I don't let him answer and I lean up to kiss him. Diego kisses me back almost immediately, then I feel his hands wrap around my waist to get closer to his body and I wrap mine around his neck.

“Wait…” He whispers, pulling away a little. “Why do you like me?"

I frown.

"Why not?”

“I thought that… I don't know, I thought you would want some other, one of my brothers or another boy. I just stuttered and trained with my knives, I didn't-"

"I always thought your stuttering was adorable, plus you put a lot of effort into everything you worked on, you keep doing it,” I support my hands on his chest. "Your brothers I get along very well. It's different with you.”

He leans in and puts our foreheads together.

"I'm a jerk for waiting so long," He says, making me laugh.

"We are."

I kiss him again, but this time with more intensity. Then I feel his arms on my legs, he helps me jump and I wrap my legs around his waist.

"Wow, those waffles are magical."

I jump away from Diego at hearing the voice. We both turn to the door only to find his siblings are standing in the hall, the door wide open.

"It was about time,” adds Five drinking from his cup of coffee.

Again I feel my cheeks burn.

"I knew it," says Allison.

"Alright, the show ended, get out!” says Diego and they complain.

“Be safe!" Klaus yells as he closes the door.

When we’re finally alone, Diego carries me again, we began to laugh and I hide my face in his neck, I feel his chest vibrate with laughter.

"Only they can find us like this…” I move away a little and reconnect my gaze with his.

"Maybe next time it won't be in this position," He answers, raising his eyebrows making me laugh.

Before I could answer, he walks over to the bed and throws us into it. I squeal in surprise, but laugh again feeling his weight on me, not hurting me. Diego adjusts himself by leaning his arms to the sides of my head.

"Ready to make up for lost time?"

“I’m ready.”

#Diego Hargreeves #Number Two #Umbrella Academy #Umbrella Academy fanfic #Diego x reader #twoidiots writing #Diego Hargreeves x reader

[rappaccini]

I love your metas and thoughts and analysis on tua! So I wanted to ask you what you thought of the romance and pairings canonically portrayed in the show. Were any done well or written well, in your opinion?

thank you!

and, honestly, i think it’s a real mixed bag, skewing towards ‘not really?’

tl;dr, only alluther is consistently good. the rest is either so-so or weighed down by bad execution.

for season 1:

allison and luther are the only romance i’d say were implemented and executed well.

their actors have great chemistry, and their characters are written in such a way that a slow build between the two towards a coupling feels both inevitable and even natural; to put it in perspective, the first time i watched the show, i entered it hating the thought of them being a couple. i saw the locket and the handhold and thought ‘dear god don’t you dare’, and by the end i loved them together.

the show characterizes them as two people who are perfect for each other. their personalities compliment each other well, they have a genuine bond that extends far beyond attraction (and is the only real thing in allison’s life, a brilliant change to the source material), so not only do i buy that they want to be a couple, but that they’re wonderful partners too. and what they need most for their respective journeys the other can provide. it’s good. it’s very, very good. these are two characters who should end up together. to such an extent that if they don’t, something is fundamentally wrong with the story.

the story is also incredibly balanced with how it handles their romance; it doesn’t dominate their plotlines; luther’s is still primarily discovering that his father is an abuser, and allison’s is... a mess, but hammers out to humbling herself in order to become worthy of returning to claire. and they use their romance as an anchor for their respective plots, a mutual system of love and support. but it’s still vital to the plot both for those arc-satisfying reasons, but because luther’s love for allison is what motivates him to lock vanya up-- without alluther, the story doesn’t work.

and from a selfish perspective, i love how fem gaze their romance is. they are so soft and tender with each other, and i love how allison is the one who sets the pace of their romance. she makes the moves, and he is deeply respectful of her physical space, her emotions, and he is completely accepting about her marriage and child-- and even wants to meet said child.

i also love how they take it slow. neither of them is in the right state of mind to be in a relationship, so they slowly acknowledge their feelings, but don’t blast off into a tumultuous romance. i really love that.

i think the phone booth confession is a little clunky, but that’s just down to the writing.

vanya and leonard.

solid b. and by that i mean, this is not an endgame couple. this is a relationship that is a pitstop for the characters, so they can provoke what the other needs in their respective character arc.

and they do. leonard awakens vanya’s repressed powers, repressed sexual drive, repressed confidence and talent, and her repressed anger at the family.

the lack of chemistry between the actors, imo, caused too much harm to this plotline, because for it to work as well as it needs to, you need to buy that vanya is attracted to leonard. and to do that... she needs to seem like she’s attracted to him, and something in the directing/acting just didn’t land. 

so simply put, the issue with vanleo isn’t so much the relationship, because it accomplishes what it sets out to do, but the casting. someone else needed to play vanya, and someone else needed to play leonard.

hazel and agnes.

i thought it was a sweet, surprising, believable romance. but i don’t have much to say about it. they were good... but that’s really it. i think that’s more of them being side characters than anything.

hazel and cha-cha.

 yes, the intent according to the powers-that-be was that cha-cha has unrequited romantic feelings for hazel (and even had a deleted scene where she... masturbates to the thought of him), which does not land at all.

this is a problem because their entire conflict revolves around cha-cha being jealous of hagnes, so if your audience isn’t sure whether cha-cha has feelings for hazel or not, you fucked up. so, they fucked up.

klaus and dave

... were together for two minutes of screentime in a montage. we don’t know a single thing about them, and then they bury the gay. woo, accept the glaad award.

and their relationship exists to make klaus want to be clean, which, honestly? you could have him come to that conclusion in another way, so their relationship isn’t even that necessary. 

it sure is... there.

allison and patrick.

i’m counting it. and i think it’s an incredibly interesting dynamic, but i hate how the show paints patrick as the bad guy for trying to protect his kid from the mother that rumored her and him. allison was the bad guy and they treat her like she isn’t.

as a pitstop couple, us realizing that allison rumored patrick is incredibly effective-- especially contrasting a/p to a/l, and showing how much she’s grown... but not owning up to allison being the worse partner is not good.

diego and eudora patch

have really strong chemistry, and i buy that they were a couple at one point in time but fell apart because of differences in their personalities (so i feel like the intent was carried through pretty well there).

but the way the show just kinda breezes over how he keeps harrassing her at work is not sexy. also, the fridging is just... ugh.

the vibe i have is that they could’ve been a good pitstop couple if they’d done something with diego’s denial about his selfish hero complex being explored through his dynamic with eudora. but they don’t... so it’s just kind of a waste.

season 2

allison and luther

again, the only romance tua can write well.

i think it’s a massive missed opportunity to sideline their relationship for ten episodes (probably because of fan backlash) instead of exploring the conflict that would arise from them being an interracial couple in the pre-loving v virginia south, but this season is still dripping with alluther.

the show makes it clear that their attraction is as mutual, balanced and healthy as it was in s1. you immediately know that they’re still in love, pining for each other, and they handle the complication of allison’s marriage with an incredible amount of respect. once again, allison is the one who sets the terms of the relationship, and luther is deeply respectful of her.

them finally getting a canon kiss was steadily built up to from the first minute of allison’s screentime, when the moon motif is used to clearly establish that she still pines for him (they have a motif now!).

and once more, they’re it. they’re who should end up together, even more than before, because now we have the context of ‘luther is the only man allison can be herself around’ with measurable proof in how allison behaves around raymond.

allison and raymond

okay. so. allison and raymond have great chemistry, and i appreciate that we get to see them have a life together beyond just being attracted to each other. i buy that they would fall for each other in the right situation.

the problem is, this is the wrong situation. allison doesn’t need a husband right after her divorce. allison shouldn’t have just given up, forgotten about claire, and settled into dallas. in all honesty, they should never have been a couple in the first place; ray is here to keep allison out of the way of the plot for eight episodes, and that never should’ve happened. and honestly, he’d be far more effective as allison’s friend.

however, there was a way for them as a pit stop relationship to work: again, allison is still lying to her husband, performing for him as she conceals her true self and her trauma, and doing so fucks the relationship over.

problem is, they never do anything with that. it suffers the same problems as vissy: a hollow relationship built on trust issues with a transactional core is fluffed up and has its flaws brushed over as said flaws cause the relationship to implode, as the hargreeves sister destroys her lover’s life. and this was all ignored because a decision was made to prioritize fanservice over character development.

we’re told allison and raymond are a great team, but he takes credit for her work and then throws her under the bus when it doesn’t end well. we’re told they trust each other, yet allison has told him nothing about her and ray immediately abandons and turns on her when she’s slightly suspicious. we’re told ray loves her, but how? if he knows nothing about her and never bothered to learn. we’re told allison loves him, but how? if she’s lying to him constantly and has got one foot out the door as soon as her long-dead crush who she hasn’t even kissed comes back.

they’re not a happy couple, but the show frames them like they are, which confuses the audience. the more you look at it, the more it falls apart. and the writers, actors and directors definitely didn’t plan that.

also... raymond is fucked and it’s all allison’s fault. and the show kind of doesn’t seem to realize that. so she essentially used him up and threw him away with a little ~hey, it gets better~  message. the fact that she married him and proceeded to do All That kind of shows that she hasn’t learned from patrick; she has regressed, and it was accidental on the writers’ part.

klaus and dave

i don’t ship klave but i feel a little sorry for folks who do because goddamn did the writers try to murder this ship with a vengeance. they retconned dave’s age so he’d be a teenager, they gave klaus a creepy vibe around him, they made their reunion a split-second ‘there they did it, you happy?’ rather than a prolonged arc and they had dave commit a hate crime against klaus that’s played for laughs.

it’s a pit stop relationship, so they can’t and shouldn’t end up together, but good lord it deserved a better send-off than that.

vanya and sissy.

thanks, i hate it!

so first off... the show had to jump over the ‘this character shouldn’t be in a relationship in this season hurdle.’ and they tripped over it. vanya’s just come off of murdering her abusive boyfriend, and she’s immediately jumping into another relationship instead of taking a break to process her shit? huh???

truly, vanya should have never had a romance in season 2. it just shouldn’t have happened in the first place. it isn’t necessary.

but okay. so, i buy that they have chemistry, and that they are attracted to each other. and it could have worked, if vanya didn’t have amnesia, and if you played up the flaws. but she did, so... big sigh.

again, like with allison and raymond, the priority was using the coupling to justify getting the hargreeves sister out of the way of the plot for the season, while making the relationship as loveable and fanservicey and ~yay look at us for doing a representation, aren’t we special, don’t you love us~ as possible, at the expense of ignoring the point of the relationship within the narrative itself: it’s doomed to fail and filled with serious fucking problems that destroy it.

not only is their relationship based on infidelity and mutual lying and manipulation, but vanya and sissy have nothing in common except sex, being nice to harlan, and wanting to leave their situation. yet they’re treated like this pure, perfect bastion of love, and there’s this vibe of rainbow capitalism threaded through their relationship that poisons it: they can’t make the queer couple complex and flawed, because they’re more profitable if they’re sugary and sweet.

and they end it on a note full of mixed messages: sissy says ‘hey, you’re too damaged and i don’t trust you around my kid, but don’t move on, fix yourself and then come back, because i’ll be waiting, and i won’t move on either. remember, i want Fixed You!’ but it’s scored and acted and directed as sweeping and romantic. then we see sissy weeping, driving into a dark desert, so it doesn’t seem like her ending was happy based on how it’s framed. yet it’s all unacknowledged.

also... vanya doesn’t grow at all. all the development is given to sissy, the side character here for one season, instead of vanya, the protagonist of the show.

and vanya’s abandonment complex probably should’ve been worsened by watching her girlfriend literally reject her because she couldn’t stand who she truly was but i’m guessing the writers kinda forgot about that, like how they forgot about her personality.

basically, they learned nothing.  it’s a pit stop that did nothing for ten whole episodes.

lila and diego

so i went on a journey with these two. i first came out of s2 liking them, but now i decidedly don’t. like with vissy, the hurdle to clear is the ‘don’t give him a romance’ fence and they flopped hard over it.

ritu arya and david castaneda have spectacular chemistry, but i credit that to them being an irl couple and not to their characters.

because the romance itself... honestly feels rushed and disingenuous, like they just wanted to pair diego off with a female character as fast as possible to pair the spares and keep diego straight.

i think the relationship could have worked if they took it slow over several seasons (say, saving the reconciliation for the end of s3, after they have a whole season of time to detox from the betrayal and develop genuine feelings for each other). but they rushed it, so now imo it really doesn’t.

it feels like they were going for a enemies-to-lovers becoming-the-mask romance but i think they really botched the landing there because they fast-forwarded through it. i sincerely do not buy that these two people could possibly love each other, because they don’t know each other at all.

and the logic of diego totally forgetting about the ex he was supposedly deeply in love with who died violently and immediately leaping into a stranger’s pussy.... huh??? like, if the point was ‘this is fucked-up because she’s manipulating him in a moment of vulnerability’ then yes, it works. but it isn’t, so it doesn’t and it makes diego seem... not good. like, damn, he really did not care about patch at all, huh.

and the logic of diego declaring that he loves lila and wants her to join his family... after knowing her for like a week, during which time she’s just been lying to, manipulating and trying to kill said family? diego, who holds grudges? huh???

the vibe they have is ‘number eight au fanfic where the author’s oc is the Most Powerful member of the umbrella academy who also dates ooc diego, but it’s canon’ and i kind of hate it.

and i hate it because it could’ve been great. it had all the potential, but they fucked it because they went too quickly and were more invested in fanservice and flashy action than letting the characters organically develop and cope with the consequences of their trauma.

also, honestly... the romance isn’t even necessary. you can go through the entire plotline, without the romance, and not only would it have more room to breathe, but diego wouldn’t come off as a callous dickwad who just forgets about his previous gf and throws away his principles for a girl he fucked once.

ben and jill

what. what in god’s name.

it’s weird, there’s no chemistry, it’s literally just ‘ben wants to FUCK this girl he’s never spoken to’ and it’s idiotic that that seems to be the crux of his possession plot.

like yes, i get that jill is meant to motivate ben into wanting to interact with the world but how on earth isn’t ‘i want to speak to and touch my family again’ not the motivation. what the fuck.

also a part of me is like.... ‘is this here because the writers wanted to make it clear that ben likes women?’ because this feels like it’s here because they want to make it clear that ben likes women.

why is this here.

#asks #tua s2 salt #tua salt #tua tv

[itsthenovelteafactor]

Superhero Gothic

Thanks to everyone who responded to my previous post (special shoutout to @jeyfeather1234 💛 ) about superheroes and gothic media! I know it’s been, like, a month, but here we go.

Here’s a bit of a look into some common gothic themes, and how they apply to Doom Patrol, The Boys, Watchmen (2019), and The Umbrella Academy. This one’s a bit long, not gonna lie, but I hope you enjoy! 

Part I: Let’s Talk About Gothic Media

There is not actually an all-encompassing definition for gothic media, or even a universally agreed-upon one. You’re probably familiar with some well-known gothic works (think Dracula, Frankenstein, Edgar Allen Poe, Stephen King) but there is a lot of debate on what exactly makes them gothic. 

There are some common themes in gothic works, though: families/characters under the control of a tyrannical paterfamilias, the crumbling of the established order/estate, long-buried secrets that have consequences in the present, and supernatural events that are stand-ins for/reflective of the emotional state/past actions of the characters. 

(Note: these aren’t all the themes of gothic works or even most of them, but for purposes here, I’d like to limit this analysis to them. I’d love to talk about other themes/ideas, though, if anyone has them. 😊)

So… superheroes (quick overview in case you haven’t watched any of them… spoiler warnings for the rest of this discussion)

Doom Patrol:

Five misfit superhumans attempt to rescue their mentor figure when he is kidnapped by an old enemy.

They are very, very bad at it.

Also features a singing horse head, a sentient nonbinary teleporting street (who is by far the best character) and the narrator is the fourth-wall breaking series villain. 

Beautifully weird but will also emotionally devastate you. Criminally underrated, tbh.

Watchmen (2019):

Story takes place after the canon of the graphic novel which is too much to summarize.

Alternate history (that should really feel more fictitious than it does) where white supremacist organization the Seventh Cavalry, masked police officers, and former superheroes in hiding all collide in Tulsa Oklahoma

Swept the Emmys this year and ABSOLUTELY DESERVED TO

The Umbrella Academy:

Washed up former child superheroes are forced to reunite when their father dies under mysterious circumstances 

Time travel, dysfunctional siblings, and a killer soundtrack

Basically a family drama with the superhero story as secondary (complimentary)

Probably the most obviously gothic of all of these it is aesthetic AF 

The Boys: 

Superheroes exist but they are corporate sellouts under the control of evil company Not-Amazon (AKA Vought)

Regular human protagonists try to hold them accountable for their actions with varying (read: usually minimal) success

Yes, it’s the one from those weird ads earlier this year

Billy Joel!! 

Part II: Niles Caulder, Ozymandias, and Other Terrible Father Figures

The Tyrannical Paterfamilias: 

Does not always mean a father figure explicitly, often relating to the notion of a patriarchal tradition, or family inheritance that plays a role in controlling the main characters. 

Sometimes, it is a father figure. 

Sometimes, it is a representative of patriarchal tradition/male head of pseudo-family unit.

So, uh, role call: 

Reginald Hargreeves (even in death) holds power over his children, and has shaped all of them into the adults they have become, and that drives the majority of the conflict. Each of the major character individually grapples with the after-effects of his abuse. Luther feels the need to be the leader and protect everyone and alienates his allies as a consequence. Diego constantly asserts himself as a hero (often to dangerous extremes) because it is the only way he was ever valued. Allison has to teach herself boundaries and responsible use of her powers after he encouraged her to abuse them for years. Klaus turns to drugs to cope with his childhood trauma. Five disobeyed his father with disastrous consequences and is constantly fighting to not become him. Vanya spent her entire childhood in the background, and never learned to assert herself in a healthy way. Thanks, Reggie.

Homelander says that The Seven are like a family. While whether or not this is accurate (it isn’t) is up for debate, he does occupy the tyrannical paterfamilias roles incredibly well. Homelander controls every member of the Seven, threatening them and their loved ones whenever they step out of line (read: do not do exactly what he wants in the exact way he wants them to do it.) He is also very closely tied with conservative/patriarchal rhetoric in-universe and at one point dates a literal Nazi. 

William Butcher less evil than most of the other characters on this list but the bar is also like, on the ground. Butcher tries to control the Boys in a similar way (Butcher and Homelander are character foils, okay? it’s actually pretty neat). He’s perfectly willing to sacrifice them in pursuit of his own goals, disregards their points of view and the well-being of their loved ones, and tries to cut loose anyone who disagrees with his methods (recall when Hughie tried to rescue his friends at the end of s1 and Butcher… punched him in the face? Yeah, that.) The difference is that the Boys can push back against his without being, you know, brutally murdered. (And also the Butcher isn’t a literal monster; I’m not anti-Butcher, okay? He’s an interesting character and the fact that he seems constantly on the verge of becoming that which he hates most is part of what makes him interesting.)

Guess what, folks? It’s hating Niles Caulder hours. He engineered accidents to turn the main characters into his test subjects, and then kept them conveniently hidden away in his large manor. Stole their autonomy and independence but paints himself as a benevolent father figure. And that’s not even including what he does to his actual daughter, Dorothy. He’s terrified of her growing up (read: becoming a young woman) and so he locks her away for almost 100 years and, when she is freed, yells at her constantly and makes her terrified of showing any signs of maturation (even though she’s 111 and clearly tired of being written off as a child).

The relationship between Ozymandias and his daughter, Lady Trieu, is integral to the final act of Watchmen. Heralded as the “smartest man in the world,” Ozymandias refused to acknowledge his daughter as his until he needed something from her. While Lady Trieu is more self-sufficient and independent than some of the applications of this trope, she goes to great lengths to prove herself, first to him, and then to herself when he rejects her.

Part III: Been a Long Time Gone (Constantinople) 

Gothic fiction is often associated with change, and particularly, the collapse of established systems of power. For example, many works like The House of the Seven Gables and The Fall of the House of Usher take place in old, crumbling manor houses. There is a reason for this! These kinds of estates are remnants of a past that is irreversibly gone, and their continued presence in decrypt forms serves as a reminder. 

Each of the four series takes place at a moment, either on a wide scale or on a personal scale (or both!), in which an established order is being questioned, and the constant reminders of that failed order are used to gothic effect.

The Umbrella Academy plays this most directly (In fact, there are TONS of parallels between the end of s1 of TUA and House of Usher that I don’t have the time to get into right now... lmk if you want that meta). We can see the Hargreeves mansion as a very literal example of this. While not worn down, the house is notably both very large and very empty. Shelves are filled with merchandise for a superhero team that disbanded over a decade prior, and portraits of a family that no longer speaks to each other. None of the family members ever seem truly comfortable or at ease in the house, and for good reason - every back corner is a reminder of their incredibly traumatic childhood. 

In The Boys, the story begins with the fridging death of the main character’s girlfriend, Robin, at the hands of a member of the Seven, a group of heroes so ingrained in the public consciousness that when they later hide out in a costume shop, literally every single costume is for one of Vought’s heroes. The Seven represent the system in power, which, at the disposal of Not-Amazon means corporate greed, shallow altruism, and the cultivation of public personas at the expense of actual humanity. 

From that moment on, the sheer presence of The Seven on everything from public billboards to breakfast cereal is a remainder for Hughie (and the audience) that this established system doesn’t work and is based on lies, which serves this effect on a personal level. In the broader scale, however, we also see that the Seven themselves are fracturing under an unsustainable business model. Even their name, “The Seven” starts to seem a bit dated when halfway through season one through the end of season two there are notably... less than seven of them. 

The main characters in Doom Patrol are all in recovery after the accidents that irreversibly changed their lives. We see through flashbacks the people that they used to be, and the difference is striking. They were each established in their own elements: Cliff a famous race-car driver, Rita a world renowned actress, Larry a hero pilot, Jane was involved in counter-cultural movements, Vic was a student and athlete. The foundations upon which their worlds were established are completely decimated by the accidents, and now they (save Vic and sometimes Jane) live mostly in isolation in Niles’ manor house, an estate that is far larger than would be necessary to comfortably house a group of their size.

And you feel the emptiness, both in the manor, and in the lives of the characters. They have barely created a shadow version of their own existence when the series starts, so fragile that a simple trip into town devolves into utter chaos. 

Angela Abar of Watchmen has also constructed a life following the terrifying act of terrorism on the White Night. It’s a bit of a double life, and we see that the balancing act is challenging for her, even before the story truly begins. The death of Judd Crawford, and the revelation about him that follows is not only traumatizing on a personal level (but it definitely is that), but also upsets her understanding of the world. People she’s come to trust are not just dishonest but truly monstrous. And the more Angela learns about what has been happening, the more her understanding of the world begins to unravel. Her memories, and the memories of those around her are cast in a much more sinister light, and the effect is genuinely chilling. 

Part IV: “I’m the Little Girl Who Threw the Brick in the Air”

In episode 3 of Watchmen, Laurie contacts Dr. Manhattan on the cosmic phone booth to tell him a joke. It’s a version of what TVTropes calls the “brick joke,” and it relies on set up taking place early on, other stuff happening, and then the response coming at an unexpected moment. 

So, yeah. Events of the past/buried secrets resurfacing with consequences in the present.

Continuing with the theme from Watchmen, the entire series is punctuated with the way the past and the present intertwine, with elements from both the original Watchmen graphic novel, and actual American history. One of the things we talked a lot about in my gothic lit class was the manner in which the overhanging specter of past atrocities casts a shadow over the present, and how many works cannot help but have gothic themes because there are so many horrifying things in the past that cannot be ignored, and provide both context and nuance for the discussions we have in the present. No series tackles these topics quite so directly (and with as much care) as Watchmen. (note: it does not always make for easy viewing, but if you’re in a place where you feel like you can engage with that kind of material, I highly recommend the show.)

In Doom Patrol, the past actions of the characters very much control the storyline (see: previous discussion of Niles Caulder), but the character whose storyline I want to talk about here is Rita (partially for plot reasons and partially because I just love Rita, okay?). We learn when we first meet Rita that in the past she was... not a great person. We know that the trauma of the accident that gave her her powers has changed her, we also know that she still holds on to the guilt and that her guilt has limited the scope of her world for years, but we don’t know what exactly it is that she’s done. 

Enter Mr. Nobody, all-powerful narrator who is not just aware of Rita’s greatest sins, but perfectly capable of manifesting reminders of them into the story. She is confronted with empty cradles, and the sound of crying children in the background of many scenes and we see how much it effects her, without a full understanding of why it does (see: The Tell-Tale Heart). Her past begins to haunt her physically, and she begins to crumble in response to it, until finally she is forced to confide in a stranger (and thus the audience). The past actions do not just inform the audience of Rita’s character - they show up to influence her behavior in the present. 

The ending of The Umbrella Academy season 1 is super evocative of the gothic genre with Vanya breaking open the soundproof chamber (wherein she was silenced for years) and rising from the basement to destroy the last remnants of the Hargreeves legacy (which would be awesome if the last remnants of the Hargreeves legacy didn’t include the rest of her family). Pretty much every mistake the siblings make over the course of the season feeds together to create the finale, but the primary cause isn’t something any of them actually did. It all ties back to Reginald Hargreeves’ complete inability to be nice to children. Any children. His own and random strangers that need help. 

In The Boys, while the extent to which people are making f-ed up choices in the present cannot be expressed enough, we see through the characters of Homelander that many of the present difficulties are a result of past mistakes. Particularly, the profit-seeking corruption within Vought. We learn in s1 through Vogelbaum that Homelander was raised in a lab by Vought as an experiment, only to be unceremoniously thrust into the spotlight and told he was a superhero (which... does not justify a single one of his actions but is still a major yikes). As the head scientist of the project, Vogelbaum is very aware that ignoring his conscious if the name of research has essentially created the biggest threat their world has ever seen. 

(Seriously y’all just stop raising your super kids in isolation) 

Part V: Put Them Together, and They’re the MF-ing Spice Girls 

Having the environment respond to characters’ emotions/mental states is pretty common in gothic works (it was a dark and stormy night = someone is probably not doing super well). One of the advantages of the genre’s tendency towards the supernatural is that, often, those elements of the stories, as well, are reflections of the main ideas of a work of fiction (see: Stephen King’s really unsubtle period metaphors).

Because all of these shows have a ton of supernatural/scifi elements by virtue of being, well, superhero shows, I thought it would be easier (and more fun!) to come up with a short list of elements, what they mean, and what cases they might apply to.

1. A Nonlinear Experience of Time

The Umbrella Academy: legitimately about time travel. Characters are attempting to fix the timeline but are unable to because they are both mentally and sometimes literally stuck in the past. 

Watchmen: In the episode This Extraordinary Being, Angela experiences firsthand the experiences of her grandfather, under the influence of a drug called Nostalgia. The episode touches on many themes, one of which being the impact of generational trauma in marginalized communities. Throughout the series, Dr. Manhatten is cursed with experiencing all time at once, and the episode A God Walks into Abar illustrates that, because of this, he is constantly facing the consequences of particular actions before, after, and while he is preforming him.

Doom Patrol: Mr. Nobody is able to physically travel to one of Jane’s flashbacks via his fourth-wall breaking powers, and gives Dr. Harrison an ultimatum for the future. 

What it implies: Events, particularly events that evoke guilt or conflict, are not as rooted in the past as one would like to think.

2. Powers/Abilities that reflect personal trauma/failings

Doom Patrol: Larry’s abilities/bond with the Negative Spirit have made it so that he is constantly covering himself with bandages/avoiding other people, which reflects his experiences having to hide his identity as a gay man in the 50/60s. Rita forced herself to walk a thin line, betraying everything in pursuit of her image; her abilities require constant effort to keep her entire body from becoming misshapen and out of control. Vic’s father with boundary issues can literally control his perception of the world through his cybernetic enhancements. Dorothy’s abilities manifest as imaginary friends because she was kept isolated for years at a time. 

The Umbrella Academy: pretty much all of the kids’ powers are representative of the interpersonal skills they were never able to develop. Luther is super-durable but also the most emotionally vulnerable of the group. Five can teleport and time travel but always seems to be too late to stop things. Diego can manipulate the trajectory of projectiles but cannot escape the path his father set out for him, not matter how much he resents it. Vanya always forced herself to stay quiet until the sound literally explodes out of her.

The Boys: Annie’s abilities allow her to control light, but she struggles (in the beginning) to bring to light the horrible things done to her behind closed doors. 

Watchmen: Not technically a power, but Looking Glass’ mirror-mask is a constant reminder of the hall of mirrors that both saved his life and traumatized him forever. 

What it implies: from a story perspective, these allow for an exploration of trauma/guilt to occur on a scale much larger than people simply talking about their problems (as if anyone on any of these shows knows how to talk about their problems...) It also means that the trauma/guilt of the characters takes on a physical form that is able to haunt them, and constantly remind them/hold them accountable for their past actions.

3. Diluted Sense of Reality:

Doom Patrol: The first season is narrated by its main villain, and throughout the season we see that the act of narration itself has an impact on the story.

Watchmen: The event that kicks off the plot of the story is hinged upon a paradox introduced by Angela near the end of the series when trying to speak to her Grandfather in the past through Dr. Manhattan.

The Umbrella Academy: The pair of episodes in season 1, The Day that Wasn’t and The Day That Was take the same point in time and explore two possible avenue for the future from there, with The Day that Wasn’t ending with the events of the entire episode being completely erased from the timeline.

What it implies: you can’t necessarily trust everything you see, even from the audience perspective, giving them a position not unlike that of the characters. The character’s uncertainty and confusion is magnified and reflected in the world that surrounds them.

Other examples: an apocalypse (The Umbrella Academy, Doom Patrol, Watchmen (of a sort)), ghosts (The Umbrella Academy - hi, Ben!), immortality/invulnerability (Watchmen, Doom Patrol, The Boys), and characters that look significantly younger than they actually are (The Boys, The Umbrella Academy, Doom Patrol). 

Part VI: Why Did You Write a Literal Essay Don’t You Have Real Schoolwork (yes... shhhhh...)

And... there you have it. I don’t really have some grand conclusion here. This is (clearly) far from a complete analysis but it is the most my finals-week brain can concoct at the moment. 

If you have other ideas, let me know! You can always add to the notes or message me – my inbox is always open!  If you got this far, thank you so much for taking the time to read this! Much love! ❤️

#the boys tv #doom patrol #watchmen 2019 #the umbrella academy #the boys #doom patrol hbo #watchmen hbo #tua #meta #tv analysis #gothic literature #gothic media #long post #Watchmen meta #TUA meta #The Umbrella Academy meta #The Boys theories #The Boys meta #Doom Patrol meta #started writing this #had a breakdown #bon appetit #seriously though this was so fun to write #I have to go do chemistry now aaah

[calmturquoise]

for the ask meme: diego hargreeves 🥺

1. on a scale of 1-10, how ticklish are they?

A solid 9.5.

2. where are their most ticklish spots?

By FAR his most ticklish spot is his belly button, followed by his belly, sides, and ribs.

3. which spots are they not ticklish?

Diego’s basically ticklish everywhere, but his knees are one of his least ticklish spots.

4. what is their laugh like?

It’s so dependent; he squeaks at certain spots, especially when he’s tickled by surprise, but when his worst spots are tickled he turns into a shrieking, babbling mess. On his more mild-moderate spots, he tends to be very very giggly.

5. do they enjoy tickling? if yes, is it a fun platonic/familial thing, or kinky thing to them, or can it be both depending on the circumstance?

Yes to everything! He definitely loves tickling even if he pretends not to, and tickling can be either platonic (when he’s with his siblings) or kinky (when he’s with a romantic partner).

6. are they more often a lee or ler, generally?

He usually ends up as a lee, both because he secretly loves it and because everyone knows just how incredibly ticklish he is, he just has major Lee Energy.

7. who is someone in their life that they tickle often?

Klaus! He tickles Klaus a lot because Klaus a) is very ticklish and b) likes tickling so c) doesn’t fight back too much.

8. who is someone in their life that they get tickled by often?

Basically everyone, but especially Luther, Allison, Ben, Five, and any romantic partner as soon as they discover just how ticklish he is.

9. does the word “tickle” or any variation of embarrass them?

Yes omg Diego is so WEAK for hearing the t word, he blushes immediately and denies that he is ticklish or has ever been tickled. Tickling? What’s that, never heard of it.

10. are they embarrassed about their ticklishness, and do they try to deny/hide it?

100000% yes.

11. would gentle tickling or rough tickling affect them more?

Both, but depending on the spot! Rough tickles are perfect for his feet or underarms but not great for extra sensitive spots like his belly button, where gentle tickles are enough to drive him CRAZY.

12. is there a specific spot that they enjoy being tickled, either exclusively or more than other spots? what is it?

Basically his entire midsection! His belly/ribs/sides are super ticklish and even though he complains and begs non-stop he loves being tickled there because he completely loses control and it feels amazing.

13. is there a spot that they can’t stand to be tickled, either because it’s just too sensitive, or it’s uncomfortable/painful/etc? what is it?

He kinda loves having his belly button tickled but he also can’t stand more than a few minutes of it max. because he’s just too ticklish there, he’d die.

14. would they ever purposefully bug a friend/partner/sibling into tickling them, and if so, how would they go about it?

When he’s in a restless mood he’ll sometimes go bug one of his siblings into tickling him, usually by hitting them with small objects using flawless aim until they finally lose it.

15. does teasing affect them?

YES he cannot handle any teasing, he immediately turns bright red and loses any ability to speak or move or think. If hearing the word “tickle” is embarrassing, teasing turns that embarrassment up to 5000.

send me a character and i’ll share my tickle headcanons

#omg my child i love him #The Umbrella Academy #TUA #Diego Hargreeves #ask meme #ticklishhargreeves

[honeytea8]

Here I am again with some HC’s you ain’t ask for (except maybe @redbeanb0i 🤣), so just go with it! Shoutout to the anon(s) who said that Avdol listens to Lizzo lmao this is for y’all too!

✨Stardust Crusaders and Their Song Picks✨

(based off SOME of my playlists/tastes)

Muhammad Avdol 🔥

Ngl, I see him as someone who likes anything with a nice beat and a tempo he can vibe to. He and Oldseph have literally the same music taste, which you will see later, but Avdol’s definitely more modernized. He has a jazz and soft rock collection which is cool and all, but sometimes, you just wanna a lil some-some while you feed your chickens 😂 (which is also why I have a few afrobeats in here for him too!).

“Truth Hurts” — Lizzo

“Candy” — Cameo

“Creep” — TLC

“Good as Hell” — Lizzo

“LOVE. FEAT. ZACARI” — Kendrick Lamar

“Mad Over You” — Runtown

“Skin Tight” — Mr. Eazi

“Adorn” — Miguel

Jean-Pierre Polnareff ⚔️

Polnareff sits in that limbo/middle ground between hype and chill. He mostly listens to upbeat songs that have him either bumpin his head or dancing like a fool; has the occasional turn up song too, of course. I think he’s probably the most accepting of other music genres as well, so his tastes would be all over the place. Polnareff listens to whatever his ears enjoy the most! Actively seeking for new music too omg!

“Level Up” — Ciara

“Tempo” — Lizzo

“Hotline Bling” — Drake

“Way Back Home” — SHAUN

“Adore You” — Harry Styles

“MONOPOLY” — Victoria Monet

“Captain Hook” — Megan Thee Stallion

Bonus: “WAP” — Cardi B, Megan Thee Stallion 😈

Kakyoin Noriaki 💚

The Chill Shit™! Basically songs he can play in the background while he sketches, reads or writes. I strongly believe that he and Jotaro prefer LoFi beats/game instrumentals/anime OP or ED’s. But based on what I listen to, I’d say his tastes are really soft vibes, though I can totally see him dipping into Polnareff’s playlist too. Prefers chill rappers like Childish Gambino and soulful RnB singers.

“Sober” — Childish Gambino

“Get You” — Daniel Caesar

“The Weekend” — SZA

“Reborn” — Kid Cudi

“NO HALO” — BROCKHAMPTON

“I Want You Around” — Snoh Aalegra

“Forrest Gump” — Frank Ocean

“Eternal Sunshine” — Jhene Aiko

Old!Joseph Joestar 🦾

Only the classics baby! The stuff that makes him feel young again; funky, groovy beats, or smooth and soulful ballads. That’s the stuff that has him pulling Suzi Q close and giving her a giant smooch, then twirling her around as they dance in the middle of their living room 🥺🥺😭 (tbh, I can see him really liking Usher too)

“Never Too Much” — Luther Vandross

“PYT” — Michael Jackson

“What You Won’t Do For Love” — Bobby Caldwell (this!!!!)

“September” — Earth, Wind & Fire

“Get Down on It” — Kool & The Gang

“Confessions Part II” — Usher (I swear I’m not trying to be funny or ironic....okay yes I am LMFAO)

“Ordinary People” — John Legend

Jotaro Kujo ⭐️

Kind of a tough cookie, ngl. I feel like him and Kakyoin are similar in tastes, but he wouldn’t appreciate some of the soft songs I have on my playlists. Like I said, LoFi beats are his go to, because they’re easier to tune out and he doesn’t get bogged down with lyrics. If he had to choose, here’s what I think he’d select. Also don’t see him as a rap fan that much, but if he listens to it, it’s 1000% because the lyrics resonate.

“Home” — BROCKHAMPTON

“Selfish” — Jordan Rakei

“Drive Safe” — Rich Brian

“Cocoa Butter Kisses” — Chance the Rapper (irony aha)

“Acid Rain” — Chance the Rapper

“instagram” — DEAN

“Apparently” — J. Cole

Honestly, I could go on for forever, especially considering this is mostly one genre of music and totally not all they listen to. If y’all want a Spotify playlist including other genres, lemme know, I feel like that would be super fun to do.

Also, should I do Bucci gang or the Morioh peeps next?? 👀

#stardust crusaders #jean pierre polnareff #muhammad avdol #joseph joestar #kakyoin noriaki #jotaro kujo #jojo #jjba #sdc #jojo’s bizarre adventure

[thewatermelloncat]

Excuses   (part 1)

Summary: Written playing on the idea of sick Little!Five (sort of) based on a prompt by Anonymous. Also paired with a prompt by another Anonymous wanting more of the doting Allison dynamic with Five.

Author’s Note: I’m sorry, I have no idea where Vanya and Ben went in this one. Couldn’t find a nice way to put them in.

☆ For writing this all in under two hours, I’m pretty proud of it  ☆ 

Warnings: Swearing

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The whole ordeal started with a sentence.

“Can I stay home from school?”

For the life of him, Five doesn’t even know why he asks – he is much older than any of them. He knows even less why his question was directed at Luther.

“Why?” Luther’s tone wavers like a warning.

“I feel sick” Five states simply, not seeing the need to elaborate.

Keeping the same wavering tone Luther then pronounces, “how?”

Five draws out a sigh as he leans against the kitchen doorway. “Don’t know, just feel off.”

This time it’s Luther’s turn to sigh as he leans back in his chair. “That’s not a very convincing reason, Five.”

“Sounds like making excuses to me” Klaus says from further down the kitchen table, not looking up from the comic book in his hands.

If he had looked up then, he would have been met with Five’s glare as it attempts to melt him to the bone.

Turning his gaze back to Luther, Five sees him gesture towards their brother.

“He has a point you know... for once” he seems to add as an afterthought. “You never want to go to school anyway.”

“That’s because I already know everything!”

“Well, I don’t know. Learn some social skills. You’re lacking in those” Klaus looks up this time when he speaks to him.

“Hey!” Diego interrupts before a fight can breakout. It’s too early in the day to be bothered with that. He turns his head to Klaus with a warning look before moving on to Five. “Does your head hurt?”

“Yes.”

“Does your stomach hurt?”

“Not really” it doesn’t but Five still doesn’t feel like eating.

“Eat something, you’re probably just hungry” Diego tells him before returning to his own breakfast.

“I’m not hungry.”

“Your loss” Diego ignores the bite in his brother’s tone. “Car leaves in ten.”

“I’m not driving with you” Five rejects. There is no way that he wants to be around any of them if they don’t believe him.

“How else are you going to get there?” Diego scoffs.

“I’ll blink in” Five shrugs before pushing himself off of the wall.

“No” Luther warns pointedly before Klaus cuts him off.

“If you really feel sick, you won’t be able to do it.”

“Try me, Klaus” Five snarls at him.

“No!” Luther reasserts, drawing all eyes to him. “We agreed that you would go to school like someone your age” –

“I’m not fucking fourteen, Luther!”

“Fine, someone who looks like your age!” Luther corrects after Five interrupted him. “And no powers would be used because everything needs to appear like it’s normal.”

“Right, that’s it!” Diego stands out from his chair, hitting his hands on the table. “Car is leaving now if you want a lift.”

“Don’t bother, I’m walking” Five huffs before stalking away up to his room to grab his things.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It should have been a whole ‘fuck you’ moment when he climbs into the car outside of school, but at this point he can’t be bothered.

Half a day of sitting through classes with his teachers giving him disapproving stares because of him not paying attention could have ended badly – and it almost did. He knows the look his history teacher gives students before they are sent to the Principal’s Office. It was only, he thinks, when they saw his fever spotting on his checks that they decided to send him to the Nurse’s Office instead.

From there it was only a quick call home that had Diego hopping in the car and driving to pick him up. Neither of them said anything as Diego took his bag from him and they made their way to the car. Only after they climb inside and Diego starts the engine does he find the time to speak, “buddy, I’m sorry we didn’t believe you.”

Five rolls his eyes as he leans his head against the window. Closing his eyes at the coolness of the glass against his skin. “Don’t talk to me” he says weakly.

“Okay” Diego accepts and leaves it at that, pulling the car out onto the street.

Neither of them says another word on the way home.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

As soon as Five steps through the doorway Allison is in front of him. In an instant she has him stopped in the foyer with one hand on his shoulder and the other on his cheek. Her look of sympathy quickly changes into one of disapproval as she turns to Luther watching on from the lounge.

He seems to shrink under her gaze, and rightfully so: a conversation appearing to continue silently between them.

When Allison turns back to Five her glaring look is gone. “Go get changed and come back downstairs.”

Five wants to question why he has to come back downstairs when he could just stay in his room. But then he figures that he can’t be bothered listening to whatever reasoning she has waiting for him. So, instead he nods his head slightly and walks up the stairs.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“The one time I choose to sleep in, and you guys all mess up” – Allison halts her rant, spotting Five wander into the lounge. But it doesn’t matter since he understands the basis of her anger, and it would have brought a smug smile to his face if his lips had the energy to move.

Around him everyone in the room seems to freeze and then reanimate while he makes his way over to sit in a chair at the edge of them.

“Couch is yours, mate” Klaus nods his head to the empty seating which he now realises has been equipped with a pillow and a blanket.

Five shuts his eyes, hating the prospect of getting back up. Then he opens his eyes again to Klaus’ guilty look and knows he can’t ignore him. He also wonders whether Klaus had meant the things he’d said that morning or if he just wanted to gain attention by saying something controversial. Either way he gets up and moves slowly to the couch.

In the following three minutes it’s a fight for him to stay awake as he holds the thermometer Allison had given him between his teeth. Even when time is up and he goes to close his eyes, Allison holds a glass of water out to him with a tablet of Panadol. He wants to scream externally but he knows it will only take a few seconds to complete and takes what she gives him.

While he swallows back the tablet, he hears the verdict.

“39°C” Allison reads before moving to the sink to wash the thermometer off. Stalking away like the disapproving mother she appears to be.

“Five, I think I speak on behalf of all of us when I say that we’re sorry for” – Luther begins before Five cuts him off.

“Honestly, Luther. I don’t care” he means it more in a way that it doesn’t matter than as a means to ignore him.

“…feel bad and we’re sorry” Luther continues to try and make amends.

“Luther” Five sighs with a little more bite to his words this time, closing his eyes in the process. “I’m tired and I just want to sleep instead of listening to you talk on about something that doesn’t matter anymore.”

He opens his eyes again to find Luther looking back at him like he wants to protest and justify the things he said.

“I don’t care” Five repeats as he lowers himself down onto the couch, silencing any further argument.

Within seconds he drifts off, and between spells of unconsciousness he wonders whether they will fight over this later – probably. Despite Luther’s attempts at an apology, he knows he’ll be angry about the whole ordeal eventually. But right now, he’s too tired to care.

part 2

#tua #umbrella academy #umbrella academy fanfiction #five hargreeves #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #sick #sick!five

[in-tua-deep]

Daemon AU? Yes PLEASE!

I will give u the pre-canon material exploring Five and his daemon’s relationship ;3c 

---

Pancha prefers small forms. Five never knows for certain why, and when he asks her she just tilts her head and shrugs at him because she doesn’t know what to say, either.

She likes being a hummingbird, flitting around Five’s head and hovering in front of his face before nesting in his hair. She likes being a mouse, scurrying up Five’s arm and tucking herself into the pocket on the front of his blazer.  She likes being a rabbit, feet thumping against the floor as she zoomed around the room at top speed.

Five never knows, or maybe just never vocalizes why the representation of his soul prefers to be small. 

But when Reginald Hargreeves gives him scathing performance reviews, his cane clicking against the floor in time with the soft clicking of Aryia’s claws as they look down their noses, as Five stands with his back straight and proud while - 

While Pancha curls up tight in his pocket, a mouse biting the end of her own tail so that she would not whimper aloud. They know then, even if they never voice it aloud. The reason that Pancha prefers to stay small.

---

The thing that people learn early is to watch daemons. Not directly, that would be rude, but to keep them in the corner of your eye and observe. Daemons are the representation of a person’s soul after all, and souls can’t lie. 

If someone is nervous, their daemon will shuffle anxiously. If someone is angry, their daemon will puff up in fury. When someone is scared, their daemon will cringe and cower. It’s easy to spot a liar in a world where the heart lays outside of the body.

Five’s very good at lying with his own body. He stands up straight and proud. He bares his teeth in furious smiles, licking blood from his lips and refusing to back down. He speaks loudly, with purpose, with challenge in his voice and in his words. Five is hard-headed. Five is disobedient. Five is an unruly little monster.

Pancha shifts into a hummingbird, because everyone knows hummingbirds flit around to keep aloft. It doesn’t look like nervous energy when it’s for a purpose. Pancha shifts into an australian tiger beetle, because they don’t have lips to draw back in wordless snarls. Pancha shifts into a gerbil and hides in Five’s pockets, because what you don’t see cannot betray you.

They call her adaptable, laugh when their siblings’ daemons begin to settle. They tolerate the speculation about who is going to settle next and what they will become.

They both dread the day Pancha will settle, even if they don’t say anything to one another. They don’t address the fact that she changes from one form to another, cycling through dozens within the space of a day even though their siblings stick to perhaps three. They don’t talk about the buzz under their skin that drives Pancha racing around their room at top speed until they crash on the bed panting together with something clawing desperately inside their soul. 

They don’t talk about a lot of things, but they don’t need to. They’re two halves of the same whole. 

---

Luther snaps at Five for cheating, for running ahead on a mission. They’re twelve, and Andromeda looks down on Pancha with something cold in her eyes and says, “Of course they can’t obey. They’re still unsettled.”

She says it like an insult, lip drawing back to show off too sharp teeth, says it like it’s something for Five to be ashamed of. Says it like what she’s really saying is that Five is a child. Like they aren’t all twelve-years-old and just settling into their own skins. 

She says it like it’s Five’s fault that Pancha can flit through forms like she can’t shed them fast enough. Even as Andromeda speaks, Pancha is a bat, is a wren, is landing on Five’s shoulder as a sugar glider, is curling around his neck as a ferret.

She says it like it’s his fault that he’s twelve-years-old and his daemon is unsettled. Like half the twelve-year-olds running around aren’t doing so with daemons just as unsettled as his. 

(Five read once, in a book, that trauma can make daemons settle earlier. There are so many cases of children as young as nine, seven, six with daemons tiny and scared and permanent.

The same book mentioned that abused children’s daemons often fell into one of two categories: large predators, to protect themselves and bare their teeth and intimidate any who try and hurt them. And the small ones, who are tiny and scared and do their best to be beneath notice.

Luther and Diego’s daemons are large, with teeth that can tear flesh and muscles beneath their skin.

Pancha likes to take small forms. Five doesn’t think about it too much.)

Five curls his lip and snarls back at Andromeda in a way that he never does when they’re in front of cameras, because etiquette says that people don’t talk to other people’s daemons, “If you weren’t so slow then maybe I wouldn’t have had to go in alone.”

Pancha shifts from a ferret to a squirrel to a kangaroo rat. The others are used to her rapid changes, but they also mean that they can’t pin down Five’s mood based on his daemon’s body language. She’s shifting too rapidly for that, clawing down his jacket as a hispid cotton mouse and settling into his arms as a pika, as a pygmy rabbit, as a stoat.

“Maybe I should hear a rumor about everyone calming down.” Allison threatens, her hands on her hips and tapping her foot impatiently. Amraphel is wrapped around her shoulders like a scarf, lazily flicking his tongue out.

(Allison has been of ill temper and short of patience ever since Raph settled a month ago. The whole house had heard her shouting about it, and none had dared to address it when they came down to dinner with Raph draped over the back of the chair instead of his customary place in Allison’s lap. 

Raph and Allison haven’t sat properly together since he settled, and no one talks about it.)

But Allison’s words settle Andromeda and Luther, both of them backing up in a way they wouldn’t for any other sibling. 

Pancha is a bush baby now, climbing up to Five’s shoulder and tugging lightly on the hair behind his ear. 

Five holds his hands behind his back and twists his fingers together to the point of pain.

“No need for that.” Pancha says, voice clear and level and almost haughty. “They’re only jealous they can’t be as adaptable as us.”

Luther snarls and lunges forward, only to be blocked by a bristling Andromeda. “They’re not worth it.” She growls, low and deep in her chest with flashes of white teeth. Luther and his daemon try so hard to be respectable, to be cool and aloof like their father and his daemon. It’s almost sad, really.

Pancha is a manipur bush rat, scurrying to Five’s other shoulder. Five untwists his hands from behind his back and reaches up to grab her when she shifts into a black jackrabbit. 

“Have you looked in a mirror lately?” Five says, with all his twelve-year-old wit, “Your face isn’t worth it.”

The black eye he sports for three weeks is, in fact, worth it.

---

Pancha is the last one left unsettled. It shouldn’t bother them, they don’t even really want Pancha to settle, but it does in some terrible inexplicable way.

Pancha flits between forms, and none of them feel right.

“We’re obviously going to be something that can jump properly.” Five muses, tapping a pencil against a little black notebook as he thinks. “You said the kangaroo mouse didn’t feel right?”

“Nothing will feel right until the moment we settle.” Pancha points out, flicking the tail of her current ginger-tabby-cat form back and forth, “Val was definitely a wolf a few times before she settled.”

“Yeah, well, I’m like 90% sure Val settled out of pure competitive spirit.” Five dismisses rolling his eyes. 

Valencia had settled two hours before Andromeda had, and has lorded it over the other daemon ever since. Diego still preens about how he was the first of the siblings to settle before even Luther.

(Five kind of wants to tell them both that Tamaya settled a week before Valencia and Andromeda both. No one noticed because Ben hadn’t brought it up, and Tamaya had always favored hiding to confrontation. Instead, Tamaya ‘officially’ settled around three days after their siblings.)

“I’m probably not going to be a big animal.” Pancha says, her claws pricking into his skin through his pajama top as she leans against his shoulder to peer at his list. “You can cross kangaroo off.”

“I thought you said you couldn’t be sure?” Five says, eyebrow raised.

Pancha just stares at him blankly. He stares back. Pancha shifts into a Florida king snake.

“Not having eyelids is cheating.” Five scowls, crossing his arms.

Pancha easily swaps into a possum, shaking out her fur. “It wasn’t cheating, it was adapting.” She tosses his words back in his face, “Besides. You thought I could be a kangaroo.”

Five grudgingly crosses an entry out. “Well why are you a possum now?”

Pancha shrugs as well as she can as a possum. “Dunno. It’s a marsupial or whatever, isn’t it? Besides, I’m sort of digging the fingerless gloves aesthetic.” She offers a foot out for Five to inspect.

“You look like you just climbed out of a trash can.” Five informs her.

“No, that was last night.” Pancha shoots back, shifting into a pine marten to crawl into Five’s lap and bat at his notebook. He just holds the notebook a little bit higher, making her huff in irritation. 

“Dad really needs to feed us more.”

Pancha nuzzles against Five’s stomach as comfortingly as she can, even though she can feel the slight pang of hunger gnawing at her belly as well as he can. Their power takes so much out of them sometimes, it’s difficult to justify taking more to a man who sees them as an experiment instead of a person.

“I could turn into a tiger and eat Aryia.” Pancha offers, shifting into an otter and making another grab for the notebook that Five easily avoids.

“You don’t like taking big forms.” Five dismisses easily, as though it’s nothing. As though it isn’t something they don’t discuss between them.

Pancha is silent for a few minutes, and even Five stops scribbling away as he waits for her response.

Finally she says, very carefully, “Just because I don’t like to, doesn’t mean I can’t.”

They both are silent after that, Five lowering his arms to curl around Pancha’s latest form in something just a little bit too loose to call a hug. 

“It’s safer.” Pancha whispers, breaking the silence between them, “I don’t know why, but it’s safer this way. Smaller daemons - they aren’t looked at as closely. When a tiger daemon bristles, people pay attention. When a mouse daemon bristles, no one even notices.”

“Is my soul really mouse shaped?” Five huffs a laugh, but they both know that he wouldn’t be disappointed in her being a mouse so much as he would her being trapped a mouse.

Pancha nudges at his chin with her broad muscular head, “Hey, don’t knock mice. They’re survivors. Practically anywhere you go, you’ll find mice. Inside, outside, they know how to get around.”

Five hums, dropping his notebook on the bed and bringing his hands up to run them through Pancha’s fur.

“Maybe we should be something with a beak.” Pancha whispers, knowing that Five will hear her no matter how softly she speaks. “No one bothers to look at bird daemon expressions, either.”

“Maybe you’ll be a swan, able to break someone’s arm and look pretty while doing it.” 

Pancha snorts, “Yeah, you’d like that wouldn’t you. Vicious representation of our soul, that.” 

Instead of saying anything more, Pancha shifts from an otter into a meerkat. She curls into a tight little ball in Five’s lap.

“Not this one either, then?” Five says with a smile.

“Shut up.” Is Pancha’s intelligent response. “Next time you ask, I’m going to bite you.”

---

The moment they figure out what they can, theoretically, do, the buzzing under their skins gets louder than ever.

“Ask dad again, please.” Pancha begs, shifting from a budgie to a canary to a superb fairy wren as she flits about close to the ceiling of their room.

“You ask Aryia!” Five shoots back, bouncing lightly on the top of his bed even though it’s sort of childish. If anyone comes in though, he’ll just say he was trying to catch Pancha and they’d probably believe it.

Pancha turns into a magpie and immediately tries to divebomb Five in irritation, who stands there unimpressed and she’s forced to veer back towards the ceiling or crash into him. “You know she’s a mythic bitch!”

“And you think dad isn’t?” Five asks incredulously, bouncing a little more frantically.

“You don’t get lectures on how you’re -” Pancha flies to the floor and shifts into an impressive rendition of a marble fox identical to their father’s daemon, “Still unsettled Pancha, honestly, I expected better of you. Why can’t you be like the others, you’re so unruly and disheveled and I have no idea why dear old Reggie didn’t do away with you long ago -”

Five is cackling, his bouncing having come to a stop so he could slap a hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter at Pancha’s, frankly, spot on impression of their father’s daemon.

Pancha grins, shifting from a fox into a jack russell terrier and jumping on the bed with Five. “Spot on, wasn’t I?”

“Absolutely impeccable.” Five manages, sticking his nose haughtily in the air, “Why, I almost thought our dearest Aryia was in the room with us!”

Pancha nips at his heels, making him flop down onto the bed with her automatically. The shift in weight and position makes them both bounce a few times before they settle down. They’re still buzzing with energy though, even sitting still.

“I bet time travel would fix us.” Pancha says finally, voice strangely serious in the face of their previous jostling and cheer.

“We aren’t broken.” Five says equally seriously, watching as Pancha shifts into a grey collared chipmunk, then a harvest mouse, and then an antelope jackrabbit. She uses that form’s legs to launch herself from the bed to the desk across the room and back again. 

“There’s something wrong with us, Five.” Pancha corrects him fiercely, clawing up his arm as a pallid bat to his shoulder. “The others weren’t like this. We’re thirteen, now. Statistically, we should have settled by now. Or - or slowed down at least.”

Now she’s a margay, precariously balanced on his shoulder with her tail whipping into his face. Five brings up a hand to gently grasp at the twitching appendage, “The average is twelve to fourteen, technically.” He corrects her gently, “We practically just turned thirteen, we have time.”

Pancha hisses, hopping down off his shoulders in the form of a mongoose. “If we just - we have to try, Five. Can’t you feel it?”

Five bops her gently over the head, half scolding. “Of course I can, I’m you aren’t I?”

The buzz under their skin gets stronger by the day, and Pancha hasn’t been able to hold a form for longer than five or ten minutes in almost a year. It takes more effort not to jump than it does to actually jump, these days. Pancha shifts into a brush rabbit and levels him with an unimpressed look.

Five heaves a sigh, foot bouncing against the floorboards as though Pancha has transferred her nervous energy to him. “You know what dad’s gonna say, anyway.” He brings a hand to his chest and put on a nasally fancy tone, “Maybe we can revisit this topic when you’ve matured a bit, Number Five.”

Pancha gnashes her teeth together as a beaver. “You know what that’s code for.”

Five’s look is just as bitter as his daemon’s tone. He does know. Everyone knows. It’s a whole thing - people have weird ideas about what it means to settle. That it means, in some weird way, that it’s a transition into adulthood and responsibility.

How many hospital dramas and detective shows make it a point to draw attention to a child actor’s shifting daemon? How many true crime shows have grieving parents wailing about how the daughter or son wasn’t even settled yet, as though it might have been less of a tragedy if the kid’s daemon had been permanently stuck as a woodchuck. How many courtroom dramas have dismissed eyewitness testimony on the basis of the kid isn’t even settled yet.

Five and Pancha thinks it’s stupid, the emphasis put on settling. Thinks it’s dumb that he’s somehow considered less mature than a nine-year-old with a settled hedgehog daemon, even though he’s thirteen. But his age doesn’t matter. Just his daemon’s settled status. 

“What if time travel fixes us.” Pancha proposes again, fluttering over to the desk in the form of a cardinal. “What if it helps. What if it’s what we need to - ”

Settle, she doesn’t say. Because to settle is to know yourself, and they don’t even know they extent of their powers.

Five shakes his hands out, blue sparks flying down his wrists as he does so. Anything to try and get the buzz out from under his skin. 

“I’ll ask dad again tomorrow.” Five says finally, “And if he says no - ”

“Then we do it anyway.” Pancha is a coyote, lips pulled back in a wordless snarl before blue lightning runs down her form and she’s suddenly pressed against Five’s side.

“Then we do it anyway.” Five confirms, grim.

---

Time travel does not fix them.

Time travel breaks them.

They stand in the rubble of the end of the world, howling for their family with something that tastes like desperation on their lips, and no one answers. Dust swirls across the ground, glittering and gruesome as the smoke chokes the air from their lungs.

They claw through ruin until they find what they’re looking for, until Five shoves a piece of debris off of a face that belongs to a wrist with a black umbrella inked upon it, dark and final.

He finds Luther. He finds Allison, finds Diego, finds Klaus. He does not find their daemons.

Pancha is a falcon, is a racoon, is a wolf howling desperately into the crackling air, hoping, praying for an answer. But the only thing they hear are the quiet roar and crackles of the fires and their own footfalls.

It’s eerily quiet, at the end of the world. There’s no movie soundtrack, or screams, or howling winds. It’s just the pops of distant fires and the sound of rock across rock as their feet dislodge pieces of the wreckage.

“We can fix this.” Five says feverishly, “We have to go back.”

“It’s not working.” Pancha grits her teeth, pushing and pushing and pushing against the wall of their powers. It’s about as useful as trying to break down a brick wall with her shoulder.

“We’ll make it work.” Five vows, “We’ll go back. We’ll save them all.”

Pancha nods, equally grim and equally serious. 

“What we need,” Pancha says slowly, sounding out each word. She has Five’s full attention on her, “Is an equation.”

Math isn’t something they technically need anymore. It’s a crutch from their younger days, something that soothes them and calms them and helps them focus. They can jump without it, their brain doing most equations automatically.

But when they’d first been figuring out their limits on distance, when they’d first figured out the differences between jumping in water and jumping in air - they’d used math. When they were figuring out time travel was possible, they’d looked at the math.

“Okay.” Five says, breathy and small and scared, “Okay.”

---

They don’t figure out until a week in that the buzzing under their skin is - not gone, but lesser somehow. 

In their defense, they have a lot bigger things to worry about.

Five is scooping cold spaghetti-o’s directly into his mouth with a spoon he’d buffed against his shirt when he finally looks at Pancha and realizes that she’s been a barbary macaque for… hours now. She has a box of children’s sidewalk chalk by her side and is concentrating fiercely on writing while Five takes a break.

“Pancha - ” Five starts, and then finds himself at a loss for words when she looks up at him. 

“Hmm?” She asks absently, little monkey face still scrunched up in concentration. Five can’t help but wonder when the last time Pancha stayed in one form long enough for him to pick up proper expressions from her face.

“...Never mind.” Five says, and watches Pancha turn back to her work. 

They have more important things to worry about now anyway.

---

“This is a bad idea.” Pancha informs him, tongue lolling out the side of her mouth as she pants in the scorching heat. She’s a dingo today, has started experimenting with bigger and bigger forms.

(Five is seventeen-years-old. She still hasn’t settled.)

“We’re literally starving to death, Pan.” Five says dryly gripping bright packaging between thumb and forefinger like he would prefer not to be touching it himself, thanks. “Look, I definitely remember something about these things never going off.”

“That doesn’t sound right.” Pancha frowns, “But then again, I don’t know enough about twinkies to dispute it.”

They both look at the innocent little treat that Five has managed to unearth from inside of what looks like it used to be a child’s backpack. They don’t think about the child the backpack might have belonged to.

“Don’t those things have like, cream in them or something?” Pancha asks doubtfully, leaning forward to sniff the treat suspiciously, “Pretty sure anything with dairy in it went off like, years ago.”

“They’re like, 90% preservatives probably.” Five says, bringing it closer to his face so he can sniff it as well. “What do you think?”

“I think this is a terrible idea.” Pancha shrugs, which looks strange with a Dingo’s shoulders, “But then again, we are starving to death. Not sure we can afford to be picky.”

“We also can’t really afford to be sick.” Five points out sensibly. 

They both take another pause to consider the twinkie. 

“We’re so going to regret this.” Pancha sighs, laying down and putting her head on her paws. “But hey, if we die, we die.”

“We’re not going to die.” Five scolds her, peeling open the twinkie finally and giving it a distrustful look, “We totally aren’t going to regret this. Power of positive thinking, right?”

They absolutely regret it.

They don’t die, though.

---

The bright side of Pancha being unsettled is that she’s actually very useful in the apocalypse. She can take on the form of an elephant, acting as a one-daemon construction crew to clear out debris when they need a place to stay. She can run through the rubble as a mouse, squeezing through cracks in search of anything useful.

She takes the form of a chameleon, snagging insects from the air and offering them to Five when his skin starts looks paper thin and his ribs stick out prominently. 

Pancha lays in the body of a tiger, curled around her human to protect him from the cold nip of the night air. The weather is turning, and soon enough there will probably be snow on the ground.

“We’re twenty-one this year.” Pancha says quietly.

Five hums, fingers twisted into her fur. “Five more years and then we’ll have officially been here longer than we were there.” 

“Doesn’t matter how long it takes us.” Pancha says, squeezing her paws around his shoulders in warning, “We’re going to get back to them.”

Neither of them are sure they really believe it anymore, but oh how they want to.

They let the silence sit for a while between them before Five speaks up with a snort, “Not this one then?”

The question is almost an old joke at this point. Thirteen was a late bloomer. Sixteen was maybe-we-should-get-you-checked-out territory. Twenty-one was practically unheard of.

Pancha gives him a punishing lick with her sandpaper tongue over his forehead, making Five squawk with outrage. “Don’t ask questions you already know the answer to, idiot.”

“You know, calling me an idiot is really only calling yourself an idiot.” Five bites back, but they both know he’s not really offended. If he was, he wouldn’t still be cuddled into Pancha’s fur. Even their arguments are performative these days. 

“I can call you scruffy without offending myself, I suppose.” Pancha says dryly, “What is wrong with your face.”

“If you can find a good razor kit in the apocalypse then be my guest.” Five says grumpily, but he ruins it by nuzzling his face into Pancha’s chest fur making her huff with laughter.

Pancha squishes him closer, mindful of her big paws and powerful muscles. But even in this form - her hip bones are too prominent and her ribs can easily be felt through her fur. They’ll go out scavenging again tomorrow, but for tonight they can just… lay here. Bask in one another’s company. 

“Stop thinking so much.” Five draws his head back a little to sleepily scold his daemon, “You’re going to keep us both up.”

“Shut up then.” Pancha shoots back.

“Night, Pancha.” Five’s words are muffled against her fur, but she hears him loud and clear.

“Night, Five.” Pancha says softly.

---

Pancha hops tentatively through the first snow of the season, her white fur blending in well. “Five,” She says, not sure how she’s planning on following up.

“I know.” Five says quietly, reaching down to pick her up. She rubs her face under his chin comfortingly, feeling the scratch of his beard across her fur. “Happy birthday to us, I guess.”

“Twenty-six.” Pancha whispers.

“It was - it was 2019, right?” Five asks suddenly, “When the apocalypse happened?”

“April 1st, 2019.” Pancha confirms solemnly.

Five hums. “They’d have been, what, thirty?”

“It was still April.” Pancha corrects, shaking her head gently, “Our birthday is in October. They’d have still been twenty-nine.”

Five is very quiet for a long time, and Pancha keeps her own silence as they trudge through the wasteland. They’ve been doing a little better food-wise recently. They’ve discovered that while Five doesn’t get much out of Pancha eating, they get something out of it. She’s taken to wearing herbivorous forms and munching on grass and other plantlife where she can. The coming winter may make that trickier, though.

“If we go back before we hit thirty, we’d be about the same age.” Five says finally.

Pancha hums in agreement.

“But - ” Five hesitates, “We have to go back to, to before Ben dies, right?”

“They were what, sixteen?” Pancha taps at Five’s chest in a request to be put down, which he readily complies with. “Maybe we could get them out. Be the responsible adult.”

Five snorts, “Adopt our siblings?”

Pancha grins, “Hey, don’t tell me you wouldn’t enjoy the hell out of bossing Luther and Andromeda around.”

“We’ll see who’s the kid then.” Five chuckles before they both fall silent.

After all, Luther’s entire thing about Five being a brat was because - well. Pancha silently shifts into a husky with thick fur, coming over to nudge at Five’s leg as they walk side by side.

“We never really talked about what we’d do about - about me once we get back.” Pancha says carefully, warily.

They don’t need to change like they used to. Don’t shift between forms with the blink of an eye. They’re more solid now, Pancha tends to take a form for hours or entire days now unless she finds another form more useful to their current situation.

But they aren’t settled.

Five offers her a strained smile, “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.”

“Maybe if we get back, it’ll fix us.” Pancha offers, but her voice is soft and a little bit wistful. She doesn’t believe what she’s saying any more than Five does. They already travelled down that road before, and look where it got them.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.” Five repeats firmly, before his face softens a little bit, “Happy birthday, Pancha.”

“Happy birthday, Five.”

---

“Do you remember how old we are now?” Five whispers, his hair and his beard have gotten streaked with grey. Pancha’s not exactly a spring chicken herself anymore, allowing Five to card his fingers through the feathers in her wing and straighten them out.

“Too old.” Pancha complains, “What’s the point in keeping track anyway? It’s not like we know what day it is.”

“We should probably keep track in general.” Five sounds amused, “Gotta remember how far to go back after all.”

“Fuck it.” Pancha declares, nipping at Five’s fingers when he’s a tad rough with a tender spot, “Just overshoot. Either we’ll pop out when the family are babies, and we can just steal everyone, or we don’t and bam we’re right on track.”

“You’re suddenly finding a motherly bone in your body, somewhere?” Five removes his hands from her wings to brush them off on his pants. Pancha gives them an experimental flap or two. “I, for one, could not be paid enough to deal with a baby Diego. Can you imagine?”

“He’d have fantastic aim when he’d throw his toys at you.” Pancha snickers.

“Can you imagine baby Allison?” Five demands, and they look at each other for a heartbeat before they both break down into laughter.

“Oh my god,” Pancha gasps, burying her face into her own wing, “Can you imagine what she’d rumor? Everyday would be Disney world day and she would be the prettiest princess of all.”

“Ruling the world with an iron fist and a sparkly tiara.” Five manages to get out, his own face buried in his hands as he wheezes.

“Klaus would be right next to her, tiara and all.”

“Fuck you’re right.” Five laughs, a deep belly laugh they neither of them hear very much these days, “There would be so much glitter.”

That statement makes Pancha dissolve into giggles again where she was just getting control of herself. 

“If we ever get back, I’m going to buy both of them the sparkliest tiaras available. No, wait. Gonna buy the whole family a bunch of those little kid birthday tiaras, and never explain why.” Five declares, grinning, “They’d be so confused.”

“When.” Pancha corrects, and the mood suddenly turns serious. “When we get back.”

Five doesn’t apologize, doesn’t sputter or claim it was just an error of speech. He just inclines his head a little bit and says, “Right. When we get back.”

---

They’re old and broken and creaky and tired when their endless days of bouncing math off of each other and testing at the boundary of the blue that stays frustratingly solid to them changes.

Five’s hair is entirely grey now, and his beard is long and scraggly where he hasn’t taken a knife to it in a while. 

Pancha is a european hare and she’s the one that first senses danger.

The thing about living in the apocalypse, is that it’s quiet. There’s no hum of electric lights. There’s no brawls between stray cats or dogs. There’s no squirrels or rats or mice scurrying around. 

So when Pancha’s sensitive ears pick up the sound of footsteps she feels such an intense sense of - of something that it makes Five drop his chalk and swing around to look at her with alarm.

She’s glad her form today is swift, because she’s across their little ‘camp’ in seconds and in his arms, clawing her way up to his shoulder to press her mouth to his ear, “There’s something out there.” She whispers, somehow terrified and she doesn’t know why.

To his credit, Five doesn’t even hesitate despite the impossibility of her words. He scoops her under one arm and turns and picks up the gun (they don’t talk about why they have a gun) with the other. He turns around and points it at - 

A woman. They both freeze like deer in headlights.

“Hello!” The woman calls, picking her way down the debris in high heeled shoes.

“Five.” Pancha swallows, making her human look at her, “Five, where’s her daemon.”

Five’s head whips back around, and they both stare. It’s entirely possible that the woman’s daemon is just small, just out of sight and out of mind. It’s even possible that she’s a witch, and her daemon is off gallivanting about.

But Pancha can feel a scream trapped behind her teeth, feel her ears go back as she fights the urge to run run run away from this terrifying woman who tastes of empty empty empty. Something is wrong. 

She can see the way Five’s fingers tremble as the sense of wrong wrong wrong reverberates through their bond. 

“Who the hell are you!” Five snarls out, and Pancha takes the opportunity to squirm and wriggle so that she’s balanced precariously on Five’s shoulder, freeing up his other hand to steady the gun.

“I’m here to help.” The woman says brightly, still picking her way towards them.

“Five.” Pancha whimpers, and as she feels her paws tremble she watches his hands go still and steady.

“Tell me why I shouldn’t just put a bullet through your head right now.” Five raises the gun further, but the woman doesn’t even hesitate. 

“Because,” The woman says, smiling a carefree smile as she adjusts her hat and pulls her sunglasses from her face. “Then you wouldn’t hear the offer I’m about to make you.”

Five and Pancha are more tense than they’ve ever been before in their lives, and considering some of their childhood missions - that’s saying a lot.

“Which would be rather tragic given your…” The woman looks around and even though she doesn’t look disgusted the implication is there anyway which makes them both bristle, “...Current circumstances. I work for an organization called the Commission. We are tasked with the preservation of the time continuum through manipulation and removals. 

“Why are you telling us this.” Five manages to grit out, never letting his gun drop.

The woman just looks at him like he’s a child and she’s disappointed he asked such an obvious question.

“I’ve come to offer you a job, Number Five.” She says simply. 

They don’t miss the way she only offered the job to him, not to Pancha. 

There’s a lot after that. The woman explains that she wants to hire him - them - to, to eliminate threats to time caused by humanity’s free will. She tells him that her organization has had their eye on him. That he has potential. That Five can retire with a pension plan for the low low price of his soul.

Well, he’s paraphrasing. 

She at least allows him a moment of privacy to discuss things with his daemon, telling him that she will be back in an hour to pick him up and that he should take the time to gather what possessions he wishes to take with him. She seems awfully confident he will take her deal.

“She doesn’t have a daemon.” Pancha shudders against him, “She’s so empty inside. She scares me, Five.”

“I know.” Five says, smoothing his hands over her fur comfortingly, “But - Pan, the chance to get out. If they know how to properly time travel - ”

“Then we can finally get out of here.” Pancha says softly, longingly. “It’s been so long, Five.”

“I know.” He whispers. 

“She wants us to kill for her.” Pancha tells him, “Removing the problems - she just wants us to become an assassin. She wants us to be a weapon.”

“Would we kill to get our siblings back?” Five asks, but it’s a rhetorical question. They both know that they’d probably let the world burn all over again if only it meant saving the people most important to them. 

“We’d have food.” Pancha offers finally, “If it’s a job, we’ll have money. No more scavenging. We could focus more time on, on - you know.”

Five nods solemnly, “So, do we take the job?”

A shudder ripples through Pancha’s body, “What about me, Five?”

“What about you?” Five asks, brow furrowing.

“I’m not normal.” Pancha states tightly, watching Five’s face light up in comprehension. It’s been a long time since they discussed Pancha’s ability to shift. After so many years, it almost seems normal. “She’s already seen me as a hare. So do I just - pretend to be a hare?”

Five bites his lip, “Just until we figure out how to get back.”

They both know that’s not a real answer. They both have no idea what they’re going to do when they show up, old and decrepit and still unsettled. 

“She can’t know.” Five says, because at least that much is certain. “She doesn’t have a daemon. She can’t know.”

Pancha sighs, but they both already know what their choice is going to be. “Okay. Okay let’s become assassins.”

---

They’re in a hotel room, and Pancha shifts a few times just to prove she can. She likes being a hare, but sometimes it just gets itchy. Wrong. Sometimes she needs wings, or fangs, or something. 

She feels like she needs fangs a lot around the Handler. Or like she needs to be something small, like a mouse and curl up in Five’s pockets again to hide away. Usually she just hides behind Five and lets him deal with the woman, which is perhaps unfair of her but Five hasn’t protested yet.

(Actually, Pancha doesn’t speak to anybody. Not after the doctor and his capuchin daemon looked entirely scandalized when she addressed him instead of his daemon. Apparently missing out on socialization for an estimated forty-five years led to… some not so great manners.)

Five methodically cleans his gun as Pancha shifts from a lion to a gazelle to a pallas cat and back into a hare to jump onto the bed with him. 

“Today?” She asks him.

He looks up at her and frowns, his hands pausing.

“Something feels different. More right.”

Five tilts his head a little bit in though and then nods. He’s been quiet, since they got back. When they’re alone together at least. The opposite of Pancha. Sometimes she wonders if they’re just switching off, the way they do when it comes to shows of emotion sometimes. 

Pancha crawls into his lap, nudging at his hands until they put the gun aside and bury themselves in her fur. 

“We’re going to save the world, Five.” She says, projecting as much confidence as she can into her voice, as much confidence as she can into him. “We’re going to save them all.”

Five’s hands tremble in her fur, and they both politely pretend that they don’t.

“You aren’t going to do this alone, because you have me. We’re a team.” She cranes her head back so she can offer him a smile, “Team Adaptable, right?”

“Right.” Five rasps out, touching the silver patches in her fur. 

And then they get up, and move out. They’re on a mission now.

#daemon au #yeAH #long post #far tua long #i started writing it and then got super busy oops #but this probably would have been the first chapter #just establishing five and pancha as the main characters #and their whole relationship #and what it means that pancha is unsettled and why she hides it #there's a level of shame involved in a world that treats settled as matured #i'm 100% sure there are parties thrown when a kids daemon settles #like it's a BIG deal in this au #and they don't want to settle because they're so adaptable #but they also desperately want to fit in rip #the handler does not have a daemon and pancha is terrified of her #dolores is not super necessary in this au bc they have each other #i only have like six and a half more google doc pages written tbh #and they're not great bc writing the coming back was awkward #me: i struggle with juggling a lot of characters in a scene #daemon au: oh? double the amount of characters you said? #Anonymous

[b-rainlet]

Just want to say I love your blog. Your TUA content is lovely and I can't say what a breath of fresh air it is to find another Luther champion. The fandoms treatment of him, istg, some of the most ludacris nonsense I've ever had to read. Especially love how you point out he's ALWAYS been so sweet and selfless when it comes to Allison and her personal happiness. Anyway I saw you say you seem confident alluther will actually happen. I sure hope so, but why do you figure? The antis are so loud.

Awwwww, thank you anon, you’re so sweet! Yeah, this blog is on 24/7 loving Luther lockdown! I feel like the antis are easing up a little bit after S2 aired because most of Luther’s scenes were used as comedic relief and the faves he was clashing with (Diego and Vanya) seem to have a better relationship with him now, so it’s not as bad anymore, but I have to admit I never ever go into the main tag so I can’t be 100% sure. 

Maybe you should try looking through the ‘Luther Protection Squad’ tag to find some more like-minded people? I swear there are more of us out there!

But to come to the Alluther question: 

I know that the antis are loud and I’ve noticed that most of them have counted S2 as a win for them, talking about how Allison ‘moved on’ and how Alluther won’t happen but I disagree (and I will now launch into a rambly post about why lmao).

WARNING: CONTAINS S2 SALT. PROCEED WITH CAUTION

All of this is based on the assumption though that they will be somewhat consistent in their writing regarding Alluther and S2 taught me that that isn’t very likely, so maybe I’m completely wrong and Alluther will never ever be mentioned in S3, but based on what happened so far, I could see them as an endgame couple. 

I mean in S1 they were a pretty big plot point so I don’t think I have to say anything about that but even though the Alluther scenes have been toned down in S2 they were there. 

Let’s see what antis would say about why Alluther won’t happen: 

Allison is married

And? Allison has been married before and still mentioned comparing every man she ever loved/dated to Luther. Allison has been married and she has had a kid with another guy and still Alluther was going strong. 

Not to mention that the end of this season has made it very clear we won’t see Raymond again.

Raymond (and Sissy) are temporary love interests for this particular season and both of them cannot leave their timeline without majorly fucking things up - at least according to Five, but the whole timetravel rules can change at the drop of a hat - but more importantly, both of them had a talk with their respective lovers about wanting to stay in their timeline. 

So unless Allison will return to the 60s (which doesn’t seem likely tbh), Raymond is gone for good. 

 Raymond was her true love tho! Like Klave!

I don’t think antis actually word it like this but I’ve noticed how all of them hopped onto the Almond train immediately and keep gushing about how good and cute they are and that’s great! You can ship what you wanna ship! But I think a lot of the love for this ship has to do with how it prevents Alluther from happening. If Allison is deeply in love with this wholesome man, she can’t ever like her brother. 

But tbh….I didn’t buy Almond. For two people who are happily married they crumble and burn awfully fast. 

And tbh, I was thinking about making a post about this so I’m gonna add this rant here but I just wanna preface this with the fact that I don’t hate them and I don’t hate people who ship them, I’m just….using this opportunity to poke some hole into their relationship. 

I think it would’ve been more believable if Raymond and Allison would be in the early stages of dating while all of S2 goes down. Think about it.

They are married? After one year? I mean, as far as I know, Allison has been in the 60s for about two years - since Luther was the first one who arrived and he spent 3 years there??? But I am not fact-checking this, so correct me if I’m wrong - so she had time to get used to being there, adjust to having no voice, meet Raymond, fall in love with him and get married to him. 

And considering she could already talk again it must’ve have been a while before she started talking to/dating Raymond? I don’t think a wound like that wouldn’t take a while to heal but with this show’s consistency, maybe it did. 

I was actually hoping Allison would stay mute for a while longer but alas

So, they got married pretty fast imo, and you could argue that it’s the 60s but 

Allison isn’t from the 60s

Allison just got out of a bad marriage. There’s like, a year?? maybe?? between her first marriage and her second one and tbh, I don’t think Allison would get married again so fast, tying herself to someone again almost immediately, especially if you consider what getting married in the 60s means for a woman and her personal freedom (it’s hinted at with Sissy but not with Allison and even though Raymond was probably a good husband who let her have her freedom and her say in things - as we can see with their movement - it’s still the 60s. Women couldn’t earn their own money. They couldn’t even spend any money without having to ask their husband. They were basically property of their husband and I can’t believe Allison would immediately jump back into being married, no matter how nice and good the guy is). 

“That just means it’s true love! That’s why their marriage may seem rushed!”

Yeah true love. I also keep secrets from my true love.

I mean, I understand that Allison couldn’t start talking about time travel or Raymond would’ve started thinking she’s crazy or something - and maybe would’ve sent her to a mental institution as is his right as a husband, so good idea getting married! - but she didn’t mention stuff like “I had a child.” or “I lost my family.” either and those are vague enough to not raise questions.

I mean, she could’ve lied! She could’ve said Claire is dead, which considering the apocalypse was what they were escaping is true!

She could’ve talked about how she had a family, but they kinda lost each other - maybe talking about how they all moved away and she doesn’t know where they are now, even though she misses them terribly. 

I mean, I simply can’t believe that she had to grief for her own child all on her own and she didn’t even tell her husband (and she couldn’t even properly be sad about it since Raymond and her lived together, so she probably didn’t have many moments where she could think about the future and the things she lost without the possibility of being walked in on). 

And how much it would’ve meant if there would’ve been a scene of her crying over Claire when she thinks she’s alone, but alas.

Then there’s also the whole added drama to their relationship. Which was btw, so unnecessary.

@showwriters: Why do you establish a relationship you obviously want to be viewed as full of love and instead of letting it be the steady rock the character can lean on during all the already ongoing chaos, you add drama to it and let it fall apart as a side plot which immensely suffers from not being shown/explored enough. 

I mean, we already have relationship drama with Vanya/Sissy and that relationship feels more natural because their obstacles are outside forces and not...one of them distrusting the other. 

You know, I get why Raymond is suspicious, I totally do! I just don’t think it makes the relationship believable. 

Once again, if they would’ve been in the early stages of dating and suddenly Allison’s weird brothers appear and she seems to be in cahoots with the cops, I would also think ‘???’ and it would’ve made perfect sense for Raymond to be confused and distrustful and not want to talk to Allison. 

But they’re married. They’re married and they vowed to love each other in sickness and in health and yet Raymond immediately jumps to ‘Allison is a spy’.

The woman you love enough to marry. That’s your first thought. Okay. 

(And if you wanna compare that to Vissy...Vanya suddenly drives off in the night to meet her family and disappears for a while and she apparently did something to Harlan and now he’s behaving weirdly and has powers….and she’s talking about taking Sissy and him to the future…..and yet….Sissy trusted Vanya). 

And tbh, I was done with their whole relationship the moment Allison spent the whole night calling every single hospital, trying to find out whether her husband was in one of them - was even alive - in tears and close to breaking down because the last time she saw him they were both involved in a riot and the possibility of him being in jail or hurt is very high only to find out…..

…..he had a meeting with their group without telling her because he doesn’t trust her. 

And what? He couldn’t have called her to at least tell her he’s okay and he’s gonna stay somewhere else overnight because shady shit did just go down that they need to discuss but he wants to be alone for now? That’s the bare minimum and yet he doesn’t do that. He doesn’t even call to make sure she is okay since running away doesn’t mean she couldn’t have accidentally been dragged into a brawl and hurt. 

Once again: They are married. 

So tbh, all I got from this relationship is the feeling that Allison simply didn’t wanna be alone in this new timeline and that isn’t an explicit point against Alluther. 

Okay, but….Allison moved on! So she still won’t get with Luther!

Did she? Did she really? I don’t think so. I mean, one of the first things we get from Allison aside from ‘She’s married’ is ‘She looks at the moon so often, her husband notices and gets her a book related to that’. 

That’s one of the most blatant ways they could’ve said: ‘She misses Luther.’

And Luther only. Not the whole family, Luther. If they wanted to somehow make this platonic or familial, they wouldn’t have taken the character she is canonly interested in romantically (which she is and has been since S1, no matter what antis say). 

I mean, if they only wanted to show ‘She misses her family’ they could’ve added a scene where she listens to the kid next door playing the violin or sees a boy in schoolboy shorts or maybe mistakes someone for Diego or whatever, endless possibilities. But they didn’t. 

They made it very clear she misses Luther and I don’t think she had a scene that shows her missing any of her other siblings in such a way (which is btw paralleled by the scene where Luther mistakes someone for Allison, which is also the only scene where he’s shown thinking about one of his siblings to the point he thinks he sees them - as far as I remember). 

But that’s probably only a coincidence, right?

Then there’s them meeting for the first time. I mean, they hug and the rest of the world disappears.

They took the time to shoot/cut this scene in a way that, when Allison and Luther hug after years of not seeing each other, everyone else isn’t in the shot anymore and it’s just them. Because they tried to make this as platonic as possible. 

(In comparison, Allison and Diego don’t even hug. And Klaus and Allison do hug and it’s a happy moment but there is no romantic music and it’s more focused on them being happy to see each other and not framed as a romantic scene. I mean, I have no clue regarding things like ‘motifs’ and ‘scenery’ but just watch those two hug scenes back to back and you know what I mean). 

Then the scene proceeds and they talk and sit down and Luther mentions her marriage and Allison tries to apologize. 

Just think about that. She doesn’t outright apologize but she does try to explain why she got married by saying how hard it was and is only stopped by Luther telling her he’s glad she wasn’t alone. 

How….how can you read that as a platonic convo between brother and sister? Just replace Luther with Klaus. Why would she feel the need to explain herself and seems guilty about being married? Is it because it implies she gave up on finding her family? If so, that would be her reaction with every sibling but she is explicitly like this with Luther. She tells Klaus she’s married too, and in that scene it’s definitely a ‘siblings catching up’ moment and it’s a happy moment and she doesn’t seem apologetic about being married. 

She is with Luther. 

Because they both know that there’s something between them and has been for a long time, to the point that Allison is visibly jealous when Luther has other relationships (his one-night-stand in S1) and this is the second time Allison has turned towards another man instead of waiting for Luther. And that’s why she tries to apologize. That’s why she tries to explain that she couldn’t know whether they - whether Luther - would ever show up, so she tried her best to move on - but she didn’t really, hence the moon scene. 

(This is also the scene where Luther could’ve been angry with her - and she probably would’ve thought he’s in the right - since during the days leading up to the apocalypse it seemed like they were slowly working towards being together - even if the kiss never happened, there’s still the phone booth scene which is basically Luther confessing his feelings - and now she once again leaves him standing alone, waiting for her to possibly return to him. 

But he isn’t, he just tells her he’s glad that she wasn’t alone. Because he is the actual embodiment of a gentleman and this world doesn’t deserve him). 

And this is just what I remember from watching the season once and then not really engaging with it, I can’t understand how antis can see those scenes and come to entirely different conclusions. But I guess, you really only see what you wanna see, huh?

But, but…...Incest is disguting! Even their siblings think so!

They don’t. They really don’t. There’s a gifset on tumblr somewhere compiling the scenes in S1 that show how chill the sibs are with Alluther, but let’s disregard those and just focus on S2 since they changed up a lot from the prior season and antis seem to think S2 was them finally saying ‘No Alluther’. 

I guess there’s the hair salon scene where Vanya, Klaus and Allison talk about relationships and Klaus lightly teases Allison for liking Luther. 

Now, he mentions Allison crushing on their brother in the same sentence where he talks about Vanya and her ‘Farmfrau’ and unless I missed it, he doesn’t change his voice. He doesn’t suddenly sound completely disgusted, or like he wants to vomit or whatever people think, so either, he thinks Vissy is as ‘disgusting’ as Alluther, or, he thinks both are simply relationships his sibs are interested in pursuing and he teases them about them like a sibling may do. 

And then you have Allison’s reaction. 

She doesn’t go: ‘Oh yeah, that was gross, what was I thinking’, she doesn’t make a face or disgusted noises or what, no, she tries to defend herself and her feelings. 

Which tells us: 

Despite popular belief to disregard Allison’s say in the Alluther relationship, she wants the relationship and she is obvious enough about it their siblings know (and Klaus makes it a point to say ‘Allison is into Luther’ and not ‘Luther likes Allison and Allison tolerates it). 

Alluther is brought up while they talk about current relationships, implying Allison still feels this way (especially because the way she reacts doesn’t make it seem like it’s a long over relationship with no longer relevant feelings. But again, I watched the season once and I don’t remember everything that was said. I think this is telling enough though). 

So..tell me again how everyone thinks Alluther is disgusting?

By now anon is thinking: ‘What is the point of all this rambling?’ 

And yeah, I am sorry for going way too into detail but I just wanted to make it clear that if the writers were intend on killing Alluther off in S2 - like antis believe - then everything I just mentioned wouldn’t have happened.

(And that’s without even mentioning the cpr scene). 

Alluther did get reduced but it didn’t vanish even though they decided to completely erase other things (like Claire and Eudora who are barely or not at all mentioned or things like Kliego being very close). 

This would’ve been the best opportunity! They re-meet in the 60s and Allison is happily married and takes the time to tell Luther he should move on. Or both are single and Luther tries to ask where they’re standing and whether she would like to try with him and she goes ‘This would be a mistake’ and that’s it.

(I am making Allison the one who ends things because it would be ooc for Luther to just end the possible relationship after waiting for Allison for years and there needs to be some consistency even in the mess that was S2). 

But! This didn’t happen!

Alluther is more or less back where it was in S1. Allison isn’t in a relationship anymore and won’t get back with the guy and Luther loves her no matter what. And the cheek kiss seems to leave them both on a hopeful note of finally getting together. 

So unless they use S3 to once again redo the show, it feels like Alluther is set up to be endgame. Like, I am getting ‘star-crossed lovers’ vibes where you’re just waiting for them to finally get together - because they just belong - but things keep getting in the way.  

You could compare it Diego/Lila in that regard, I think it’s pretty obvious those two are gonna end up together too. 

I have another ask about how they could get together, where I will definitely ramble more, but this shall be it for now. I hope it was halfway consistent. (And doesn’t have too many typos, I’m too lazy to check).

Also the formatting is shit but idc, I spent like two hours on this

#Alluther #tua s2 spoilers #anti tua s2 #Long post