#I don’t exercise. I don’t leave my room. I barely drink water. I have an eating disorder | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hwaberry-dreams · 2 years

Text

FIVE: taste like strawberries

Warnings: suggestive, very brief dry humping, a little over the clothes touching, brief mention of mental health (no details)

word count: 6.2K

Waking up to my first morning in the apartment was strange. For starters, I wasn’t used to a large bed. My old bed was a mattress on the floor that I would fold up during the day. The large window was on the other side of the room than my old one and the sunlight was coming through it too. It was actually nice to wake up to the early morning sun shining through the net curtain. And somehow during the night, I had lost both my pillows to the floor. Only my cuddle plushie was still on the bed.

I put on my glasses so I can see where I am going as I do that morning zombie shuffle into the bathroom. I quickly wash my face and brush my teeth before going back into my room and pulling some clothes out of my suitcase.

My usual morning routine is going for a run. I just put my headphones on and block out the world for a little. I had struggled for a couple of years with my mental health and with the help of my uncle who runs a fitness centre; I found exercise helped me. It was now something I did most weekday mornings.

I throw on a beanie hat to cover my wild hair before leaving my bedroom. I jump slightly as I walk into the lounge to see Yeosang there. It is 5.45am; I wasn’t expecting anyone to be up yet.

“Morning Luna.” he smiles at me

“Morning.” I reply gruffly, my voice still is ‘morning voice’ mode so I clear my throat to sound less manly.

“Did you sleep well?” he asks, standing up from the sofa

“I did. The bed was really comfortable.” I answer.

“We are going to get you some new furniture for your room next week.” He says.

“Oh, I don’t need anything new.” I say.

“You do. Everything in there is old. Plus, you need to make the room your own. It is your own space in the apartment so it should be somewhere you love.” he says.

I already know it will be useless to fight them on these types of things. 8 against 1 is not a fair fight, anyway.

“Do you want a coffee?” he asks, moving into the kitchen as I follow him

“No, I dont normally drink coffee, unless I have barely slept and need it. I was actually planning to go for a run around the block a few times the now.” I say. “Would it be ok if I took a bottle of water from the fridge?”

“Of course you can. If it doesn’t have a name on it, it is up for grabs.” he laughs, getting a bottle for me.

“Ah, I guess that makes sense with so many of you living here.” I laugh too. “I’ll make sure not to steal anyone’s food then.”

“I don’t think you will need to worry about that. None of us would mind if it was you.” he smiles at me.

He reaches out to me, holding the bottle of water and as I take it, my fingers brush against his, causing us both to smile shyly at one another.

“Do you need the code for the door?” he asks, rubbing the back of his neck briefly

“Oh yeah, I will do. I never thought of it.” I say.

Just as well he was here, or I would have been locked out of the building.

“Let me see your phone. I’ll put the codes into your notes for you.” he says.

I pull it from my hoodie pocket, unlocking it and passing it over. I see him type stuff in before handing it back to me.

“I have put the main door code and the apartment code in a note file. I have also put my number into your contacts too.” he says.

“Oh, thank you.” I smile at him.

“There is a park across from the building. It has a trail around that a lot of joggers use. There is also a gym on the 2nd floor of the building that is free for residents to use. So if you ever want to use that too, you can.” he tells me. “It is good, a lot of high-tech equipment and even the basics. We all use the gym, some more than other, so if you need any help just ask one of us.”

That is really good to know, and handy too as I hate running in the rain. I used to go to the small gym a block away on the rainy days for the treadmill but having a gym in the same building will be so handy.

“I dont know if you drink them but there are protein powders in this cupboard too. They are free to use by anyone. The only rule we have with that is whoever is the person to use the last scoop buys a new container.” He continues, opening one of the kitchen cupboards to show me. “That rule won’t apply to you. If you use the last scoop, just tell me and I’ll pin it on Wooyoung.” He adds, causing me to laugh.

He seems amused that he has made me laugh, then quickly goes shy again.

“We have manual shakers here, or if you prefer a blender, it is in the corner.” He adds, pointing to it.

“Thanks for letting me know some rules. I’ll need to find out the other rules too soon.” I say, “Anyway, I better go for my run now or I won’t have time for breakfast.”

“Enjoy your run and if you get lost or need anything, just call me.” He says giving me an awkward side hug, which ended up being a shoulder bump instead, but I appreciate it the sentiment.

Yeosang was right. The trail around the park was good for running. It was quiet, apart from the odd dog walker. After a few laps, I head back to the apartment to get a shower, then something to eat. I enter the apartment door code and walk in, sliding my sneakers off. I feel really energised for the day ahead. I pull my headphones off and walk into the kitchen to put my water bottle in the bin. Seonghwa is sitting at the dining table eating some food while Mingi is making himself a protein shake. They both greet me.

“Yeosang said you were out for a run.” Mingi says as Seonghwa comes over, “How was it?”

“It was so good. That park across the road is perfect. It was quiet too, only a couple of dog walkers.” I answer, opening the recycling bin.

“What do you want for breakfast?” Seonghwa asks.

“I usually just have some toast and jam with a cup of tea.” I say, looking around, not really sure what to do.

“I’ll make it for you.” Seonghwa smiles. “What flavour tea do you want?”

“Flavour? Oh no, I mean British tea.” I laugh. “My mom always sends me tea bags every month. I’ll go get them.”

As I walk over to my bedroom, Wooyoung is lying on the sofa, one arm draped over his eyes. His breathing is steady. I figure he has fallen asleep, so I walk as quietly as I can so as not to disturb him. Once I get the tea bags from one of my suitcases and my special mug, I go back to the kitchen. Mingi is on the sofa, scrolling through his phone and sipping on his shake.

Seonghwa is making my toast. The kettle is boiling and I can see there are a range of jam jars on the counter now, all different flavours. I make my tea when I feel a pair of arms surround me from behind.

“Are you ok with this?” Seonghwa asks

“Of course, but I haven’t showered yet, so I am all sweaty from my run.” I warn him.

“I don’t care.” he mumbles, his nose burying into my neck as my hands automatically resting on top of his. “I like your mug.” he comments

“Thanks, I love it. My sisters bought it for me one time they visited. They knew how much I love the Tangled movie.” I reply, smiling down at the mug.

“That is really sweet.” he chuckles. “How was your first night?”

“I slept well.” I answer, as he gently turns me to face him.

“I didn’t know you wore glasses. You look really cute with them on.” He smiles down at me, his fingers delicately pushing them up my nose.

“You will see me wearing them a lot. I always wear them when I am home. As soon as I finish work, the contact lenses come out.”

“Can I kiss you?” he asks

“Are you going to ask me every time?” I ask back, grinning at him, moving my hands to his shoulders.

“I won’t assume I can just kiss you whenever I feel like it.” he replies

“You can. I won’t ever stop you.” I say, “Unless you annoy me, but even then I will probably let you do it because you are far too cute when you look at me.” I add, giggling.

There is that silly giggle again! What is wrong with me?! I am never this sickly sweet either.

“I will make sure to never annoy you then.” he says before leaning down and capturing my lips

Just like last night, it feels comfortable and natural, but it is also soft and it feels like something we have been doing for years, which I will admit freaks me out slightly. He pulls away from my lips but he keeps me close, in his arms still.

“I checked my schedule this morning and I have tomorrow night free. Would you go on a date with me?” he whispers against my lips, his nose nuzzling against mine.

“Yes, please.” I reply, nodding slightly.

“My girlfriend is so cute.” he chuckles, kissing me again

We are so lost in a little bubble of soft kisses that we don’t even notice Yunho has come into the kitchen until I hear the fridge door opening beside us, causing me to pull away from Seonghwa.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you two.” Yunho says, “Just getting myself a drink.”

He quickly grabs a juice from the fridge before walking back out of the kitchen. Seonghwa still has me in his arms and I can feel my face burning. He chuckles lightly, commenting how cute I look when flustered as I hide my face in his chest.

“It isn’t funny!” I pout. “How is this going to work?”

“What do you mean?” he asks, pulling back a bit more so he could look at me, but I am still secure in his arms

“Isn’t it going to be weird for you guys if you walk into a room and find me kissing with someone else?” I ask, feeling my face get hotter. “For example, what if, after last night, you were to walk in here this morning and see me kissing with Yunho? You just called me your girlfriend. Wouldn’t it be weird?”

“I wouldn’t mind.” he replies, shrugging his shoulders as I raise an eyebrow at him, “Not to say that I don’t care about you, because I do. We all do. But honestly, I wouldn’t mind it. We all knew what we were agreeing to with one another before Joong and I even spoke to you. We had many conversations about it.”

“Really?” I ask, my hands playing with the fabric of his fluffy pyjamas

“Yes. We had to get it right between the 8 of us first. There would be no jealousy, no time sharing either, such as having certain days unless they are planned, that it was down to you who you spend time with and when, and definitely no bragging.” He answers.

“And what about when we have sex? Would you still be ok if I were to be kissing someone else the morning afterwards?” I question. “I just don’t want things to get messy, or to ruin anything between you guys.”

“You won’t. We are 100% on this, if we weren’t we wouldn’t be doing it. Please don’t worry about this.” he says.

I know I am overthinking things, so I decide to listen to him, and not worry, especially about things that haven’t happened yet. Seonghwa gives me another kiss before asking me which jam I want on my toast. It is always strawberry for me, something that makes Seonghwa smile when I tell him.

After he makes the toast, he gives me another kiss and goes to get ready for the day as I sit down at the dining table to eat. The apartment is quiet despite 8 men living in it. I can hear the low sounds of the TV from the lounge and some movements from upstairs.

When I am finish my breakfast, I wash my dishes then head back to the lounge. Wooyoung is now awake but still lying down watching tv.

“My lovely Luna.” He smiles lazily at me, sitting up.

“My whiny Wooyoung.” I smile back at him as he playfully scowls at me.

“I am not whiny.” He pouts, grabbing my hand as I walk past and pulling me down onto the sofa.

“You just whined right there.” I laugh.

“You need to give me a cuddle to make me feel better now.” He says.

I playfully roll my eyes before jumping on him and put all my weight on top of him as he laughs. We fall back onto the sofa with me lying on top of him, completely dead weight.

“If you think this is a punishment, my dear, you are sadly mistaken. This is heaven to me!” He replies, making me laugh more as he tickles me. “Oh, are you ticklish?” he adds as I try to squirm away from him.

“Wooyoung, I am warning you now. Do not tickle me as I kick and punch!” I say, “Usually in the balls.” I add, making him let go of me.

He sits up, his arms keeping hold of me, so I am now straddling his lap. It doesn’t feel awkward, so I don’t move away.

“Ok, but give me a kiss on the cheek.” He says, turning his head and poking his cheek.

I lean forward and just as I am about to kiss it, he quickly turns his head, so I peck his lips instead, causing him to laugh.

“You are mean!” I gasp, pushing him playfully.

“Either way, I got a kiss.” He laughs.

“Just so you know I am writing your lesson plan for tomorrow, I might give you extra homework just for that!” I say, my arms snaking around his shoulders.

“Oh, will you keep me after class if I don’t do it? Spank me, teacher?” He teases, wiggling his eyebrows and his hands holding my waist.

“You are going to be trouble Mr!!” I laugh

I love it really. The banter we have with one another already. It feels nice. I know he is only teasing, but I also know there is also a small part of him being serious, too. Being near him once again was making my tummy flip. Especially as he is giving me that eye contact again and his hands move from my waist to my lower back.

“I need to go for a shower.” I gulp.

He nods, but his eyes are staring at my lips and I can’t resist him any longer, so I lean forward to kiss him. He kisses me back and his hands pull my body closer to his. His tongue slips into my mouth, causing my arms to tighten around his shoulders.

“That was unexpected.” he says when we finally pull away to catch our breaths.

“Sorry.” I say.

“Never say sorry for kissing me. You can kiss me as much as you want. I just didn’t think you would be the one to make the first move.” He chuckles, “I am glad, though, because to be honest, I was scared shitless to kiss you.” He adds.

“Why?” I ask

“I was worried you would reject me.” he answers, his eyes lowering

“I never would.” I say, placing a hand on his cheek.

Wooyoung looks back up at me, and he looks so shy. It is the polar opposite to the Wooyoung I know. It makes me realise there is more to him than the loud, confident, and mischievous man everyone else sees. I smile as he leans forward.

“You taste like strawberries.” he smiles just before his lips connect with mine

This kiss is more assertive from him. His hands move down to my ass and he gives it a squeeze, causing me to giggle into the kiss.

If it hadn’t been for the lift doors opening last night, I definitely would have kissed him then, so it was inevitable it was going to happen soon. I am not a person who holds back either. If I am sure of the situation, I will go for it.

“I really do need to go for a shower now.” I mumble against his lips, not wanting to leave his embrace but knowing I have to.

“On you go then.” he says, one of his hands friskily hitting my ass. “I am definitely going to be needing to take a cold shower.”

And there is cheeky Wooyoung again. As I go to move off him, he helps me up by holding onto my hips. I notice him awkwardly reposition himself on the sofa, and that is when I noticed the tent in his shorts. It is a bit of an ego boost knowing that a kiss causes this type of reaction in him. Same with Seonghwa last night.

I go into my room and have my shower. Afterwards I blow dry my hair, put it in a half up half down style. My hair is naturally curly, but I use my curling iron on the part hanging down to make the curls more defined and less chaotic looking. I get dressed and head back into the living room to see most of the guys are sitting on the sofa.

“The cars should be here soon.” Yunho says to me.

“Cool, is it ok if I sit out here?” I ask.

“Of course. This is your home, too. You don’t need to stay in your room.” he replies.

“Thanks.” I smile as I sit down.

“Any plans for tonight Luna?” Mingi asks

“I am meeting up with some friends after work.” I answer. “Unless I need to be here, that is.”

“No, go out with your friends. Have some fun.” Seonghwa says.

“What are you doing?” Jongho asks.

“We are going to a PC cafe for some food and gaming, then probably karaoke rooms afterwards.” I say.

“You play games?” Yunho asks.

“I do, spent most of my free time in the cafes when I was in college.” I laugh. “Still do, to be honest.”

This seems to excite them as they question me about what games I play. I know the guys are big into their gaming, so I feel it is something we have in common.

When it is time to leave, I am in the car with Seonghwa, Hongjoong, Jongho and Yeosang. Hongjoong immediately pull out his laptop and put his headphones in when he sat down. Seonghwa was sitting beside him and I was in the back, between Yeosang and Jongho. Yeosang immediately fell asleep when the vehicle started moving.

“Are you coming to watch us during dance rehearsal after lunch?” Jongho asks me.

“I wouldn’t want to disturb you all or get you into trouble.” I reply.

“You won’t. It would be nice if you were there too.” he smiles at me.

“Then I will be there.” I reply.

“I like your outfit today. It is more you.” he comments. “Not that what you wore before to work wasn’t nice. I just think you look good in these types of clothes. You know, casual clothes. Not that I’ve been staring at you.” He stutters

“Jongho it is fine. I think know what you are trying to say.” I say to him.

His face has gone a shade of pink, but he lets out a little sigh of relief, too. I have not seen him flustered before. It is kind of cute. Today I had dressed more casually. After seeing other staff members’ daily outfits, it was relaxed and casual. I hated wearing the dress trousers and shirts, anyway, but I was used to wearing them when I worked in the hotel. So today I was wearing baggy jeans, a cream t-shirt, the front tucked into my jeans and an oversized cardigan. Honestly, I feel so much more relaxed wearing this, too.

“You look beautiful, is what I was trying to say.” He says quietly.

“Thank you.” I say back, feeling my cheeks heat at his compliment.

Jongho and I have spoken the least, and always during group conversations, so it is nice to speak to him 1-1 like this. We continue to chat away to one another for the entire journey to the office, and when we arrive; the guys go straight to the studio. I usually work in one of the conference rooms, so I make my way there.

“Luna!” I hear from behind me

I turn around to see Hongjoong jogging down the corridor towards me.

“Everything ok?” I ask as he stops in front of me

“Yeah, I meant to tell you before we left the apartment, we have an office for you now.” he says, “It is beside my studio.”

I follow him towards the studio, which is on another floor.

“I am sorry I haven’t spoken to you properly yet.” he says as we wait for the lift

“It is ok. I know how busy you are.” I reply.

“That’s no excuse, though.” He says as we get into the empty lift. “Yeosang was saying you were up early to go for a run this morning. Is that a regular thing?” he asks.

“Yeah. Most weekdays I will go for a run. Weekends I don’t, unless I feel the need to. It is something that helps me.” I answer as he nods his head, keeping eye contact with me. “I had a rough couple of years a while ago. My Uncle Jihoon helped me through it. He got me into therapy and took care of me. Encouraged me to exercise when I felt better.” I add.

“I am sorry you had to go through a struggle. Are you doing ok now?” He asks as we step into the empty lift.

“I am. I have days where I am a bit withdrawn but nothing to what I was like before.” I say, nervously rubbing my arm through my cardigan sleeve.

“Do you find the exercise helps?” He asks.

“Definitely. I just put my headphones on, block out the outside world and focus on myself.” I answer, “Before I hated exercising but I find it therapeutic now.”

“I didn’t like to exercise either. But last couple of years I have been, as have the others. It is definitely good for mental health.” He comments, “I am glad you overcame your struggles Luna. If you ever need to talk about anything or need any help, I am here, as are the others.” He smiles at me.

The doors open and we go down the corridor towards Hongjoongs studio. He unlocks the door to the room beside it and we go in. It is a small space, but it’s nice. It has a desk in the far corner from the door; it has a computer on it. It is perfect for work.

“You can decorate it however you want. The company will cover the cost of any furniture or equipment you need. The computer is brand new, there is a new iPad too, and the company has ordered a new laptop for you as well. It should be here by the afternoon.” He says as I look around. “You can give your lessons in here or any other room. It is up to you.”

“Thank you Hongjoong. Honestly, it is far too much, but I appreciate it all.” I reply.

“You are welcome. I am glad you are here, with us.” he smiles at me. “I should get going before Eden scolds me for being late. See you at dance rehearsal later on.” He adds before leaving.

I guess Jongho told Hongjoong I had agreed to go watch the dance rehearsal. I sit down at the desk and boot up the computer and putting my laptop beside it. I am excited about getting started properly. I work with a smile on my face.

Before I knew it, there was a knock at the door. It makes me jump slightly as I wasn’t expecting it. I rush over to open the door and see Seonghwa. Shit, is it that time already? I think looking at the clock to see it was, in fact, right. I had got lost in my work, time went so fast.

“Hello teacher.” he grins, bowing to me.

“Oh, stop it!” I laugh, moving to let him in. “Are you ready to get started?”

“Very ready Miss Lee.” he replies

“Seonghwa!” I say as we both laugh

We sit down and begin the lesson. I had been really nervous for my first proper day of teaching; I don’t know why because it was easier than I had imagined it to be. Seonghwa was very focused on the work. He was eager to learn and enthusiastic, too. It made the lesson easy.

“You are a good teacher.” Seonghwa smiles. “No joking intended. I mean it.”

“Well, you are a good student.” I reply, putting the textbooks and my notebook away.

“So it is lunchtime now. You know what that means?” he says, coming closer to me. “No work, just play.”

He pulls me towards him and kisses me passionately. I return the kiss just the same. It is incredibly hot as he backs me into the wall. For the first time, Seonghwa feels me up and I don’t stop him. His hands are under my t-shirt. One hand grasping the skin on my lower back, the other moving up towards my breast. He cups one over the bra and his thumb rubs my nipple through the material, causing a small moan to escape me.

I can feel him smile into the kiss as my own hands feel under his top. He presses his body into mine so I am sandwiched between the wall and him. His hips subtly grinding into me, effectively dry humping me. I can feel his bulge rub against me and it feels good, but then I remember what he said last night about wanting to do things properly. Reluctantly, I pull away from his lips.

“You are so fucking hot.” he says lowly, placing kisses down my neck. “My beautiful girlfriend.” he adds in a whisper, his lips against my skin.

The flutters I was feeling in my stomach at his ministrations and kisses instantly disappear when he says the word ‘girlfriend’, replaced with guilt. I think he knows because he pulls away to look at me.

“What’s wrong?” he asks softly

“I kissed Wooyoung this morning.” I say, looking down at the floor through the little gap between us.

This was the moment of truth. I would find out if this could work. Seonghwa is my boyfriend now, and I kissed someone else. In a normal situation, I would class this as cheating, but this is not a normal situation. So I don’t really know how to feel about it. All I know is I enjoyed it and that makes me feel guilty.

“And how does that make you feel?” he asks, cupping my cheek

“Like a cheat.” I reply in a low voice.

“Darling, look at me.” he says, gently lifting my head. “It isn’t cheating. And I don’t want you feeling this way. Was kissing Wooyoung nice?” he says as I close my eyes, “I am not prying and you don’t need to answer me either.”

It was. Kissing Wooyoung was nice, and it felt easy too, but so does kissing Seonghwa. My head feels so confused by this because part of it is telling me how nice and natural it feels, while the other part is screaming at me that this is cheating. I nod my head in answer to his question and feel the pit of my stomach burn.

“I am so sorry!” I say quickly.

“I don’t want to hear any sorry’s. I am glad it was nice. All we want is for you to be happy.” he says.

“I don’t want you guys thinking that I am easy or a slut.” I say.

“Hey, you are neither of those, and we know that.” He says, looking into my eyes. “We understand this is not a normal situation and we will go at whatever pace you set. Just because you have kissed some of us doesn’t mean others will expect the same or the ones who have will expect more from you. This is all at your pace. Remember that, my darling.” he says, kissing my forehead.

I can’t help but to smile up at him. He always knows the right words to say. His forehead leans against mine as we smile at one another.

“Thank you, Seonghwa.” I say, tilting my head to kiss him.

It isn’t a passionate kiss like before; it is sweet and reassuring. That was until my stomach growls and ruins the moment, causing us both to laugh.

“Come on, let’s get that tummy fed, so it stops shouting.” He chuckles.

Seonghwa gives me a final kiss before letting go of me and we leave my office, keeping a respectable distance apart so we look like 2 coworkers and not 2 people who were feeling each other up minutes before.

We go down to one of the conference rooms and I see a ton of food placed on the large table in the centre of the room. The other members are already there except for Hongjoong. They are opening the containers and sorting drinks out. Seonghwa closes the door behind me and his hand immediately goes to my lower back, guiding me to a seat. I am sitting between Mingi and San.

“We told the company about your seafood allergy, so they ordered lunch from somewhere that doesn’t have any seafood products.” Mingi says.

“We weren’t too sure on what foods you can have and what foods you even like, so we ordered a selection.” San adds.

“In Korea I am rather limited to what I can eat when I go out because a lot of Korean dishes have fish ingredients in them. I love fried chicken. It is usually the safest bet when I go to restaurants or takeaways. Western foods like burgers and pizzas, too.” I answer him.

“Well, we got a lot of chicken here.” Wooyoung smiles at me, passing it over.

Everyone tucks into the food. I pick up my chopsticks and have some chicken. It tastes delicious. My eyes connect with Yeosangs who is making the same face as me as he eats the chicken too. He wiggles his eyebrows at me and makes the chef’s kiss sign, causing me to laugh lightly.

“Where is Hongjoong?” I ask, feeling guilty about eating without him.

“In his studio. He won’t come out until it’s time for the rehearsal.” Yunho replies.

“Should we take him some food?” I ask.

“Nope, we value our lives too much.” San says, making everyone laugh, as I don’t understand.

“Hongjoong scolds anyone who interrupts his studio time.” Mingi says when he sees my confused face.

“Aaaah right. Well, I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of a Hongjoong scolding either. I can imagine he is scary when angry.” I laugh.

“I doubt he would scold you if you took him food.” Yeosang comments.

“I wouldn’t risk it. Like you all, I value my life.” I say as the others laugh.

We spend the rest of lunch eating and talking. When we finish, the guys complain they’ve eaten too much.

“My stomach hurts!” Wooyoung whines, rubbing it

“We have 2 hours of dance rehearsal to do as well.” San joins in. “Look at my stomach!” He says, pulling up his t-shirt to reveal a bump.

“Aw a little food baby!” I chuckle

“A what?” Mingi asks

“Oh, something my mom always said. When our stomachs go round from too much food, she calls it a ‘food baby’. It is something that unfortunately I now say too, clearly without realising it.” I reply, feeling a blush in my cheeks at them all looking at me. “Sorry.”

“No, I like it.” San chuckles. “My food baby.” He adds in a cute voice, rubbing it like a pregnant woman making me laugh.

“We all have food babies then.” Yeosang adds.

After we let our food settle for a bit, we tidy up the containers and rubbish. I help despite their protests to sit down; I ignore them. When the room is tidy, we make our way to the dance studio. On the way, Yunho tells me they are preparing for their next comeback so would go over the choreography for the new song.

“I wish I could dance. Unfortunately, I inherited my dad’s 2 left feet, his ‘dad dance’ moves plus his clumsiness.” I say.

“I am sure with practice I could get you dancing minus the dad moves.” He says, “If you want to learn, that is.”

“I do, but you will have your work cut out with me. I have terrible coordination.” I laugh. “Are you sure you want to put yourself through that?”

“I taught San when he joined the company so I am sure I can teach you.” he smiles at me. “You can’t be any worse than he was.”

“I heard that!” San says from behind us

“Yunho is only stating facts.” Yeosang adds as we all laugh.

“He is right.” San playfully sighs. “I was horrific at dancing before we trained in America.”

Hongjoong is already in the dance studio as we walk in. I haven’t seen in here yet; I am surprised to find it more spacious than it looks on their YouTube videos.

“You can sit over here.” Yunho says taking me over to a small sofa at the side.

“Are you sure I won’t be in the way?” I ask him. “I don’t want to get you guys in trouble with me being here.”

“Of course not. We want you here with us but only if you want to.” he says. “You know you don’t have to be here if you don’t want to. If you would rather do something else, that is ok.”

“Are you kidding me? Of course I want to be here! I enjoy spending time with all of you.” I smile. “I love watching you guys perform. You were all mind-blowing in concert.”

“You came to see us in concert?” he asks, smiling down at me

I actually hadn’t meant to tell him that. It just popped out. Something that often happens when I get excited or nervous. I talk without thinking. I didn’t want them to think I was some crazy fan.

“Erm, yeah. My friend and I went to 2 of the Seoul concerts earlier this year.” I reply. “I bought tickets for day 1 for her birthday as it was the same day and she bought tickets for day 2. Neither of us knowing the other was buying tickets. It was just as well we got different dates.”

“Wow, I hope we were worth 2 nights of your time.” he chuckles.

I notice the tips of his ears are turning red and he is avoiding my gaze. Without thinking, I reach my hand out to his own and hold it softly. His eyes connect with mine and I feel his fingers intertwine.

“Yous definitely were.” I answer, smiling at him.

And they were. Best 2 nights of my life, to be honest. I had been a fan of their music before, but seeing them perform live was just incredible. Their talent for singing, dancing and performing was clear to see. I was excited to see their new dance and to hear the song. We spend a few minutes just smiling at one another, enjoying this little moment between just the two of us.

“Yunho!” we hear Hongjoong shout from the other side of the room.

“I better go over.” he says softly

He gives my hand a little squeeze before letting go and going over to the others. I sit down on the sofa and pull my legs up to sit cross-legged so I can watch them. My first day of proper teaching and being with them has gone as well as I could have hoped for, and as crazy as it may seem, it makes me feel optimistic that this could work.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Song recommendation: 'strawberries and cigarettes' by troye sivan

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Taglist: @kiwibaekie @fudgeflyssworld

#ateez #ateez smut #ateez ot8 #ateez ot8 x fem!oc #ateez fluff #ateez angst #ateez romance #kim hongjoong #park seonghwa #jeong yunho #kang yeosang #choi san #song mingi #jung wooyoung #choi jongho #utopia #utopia ateez fic

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freezing-kaiju · 7 months

Text

Will you send your sea angels?

Biotober prompt 11: Abyssal

warnings: body horror, brief mention of self-mutilation, religion, thallassal horror, transhumanism or perhaps dehumanization.

---

It’s as clear as the day is long; I don’t belong down here.

I found out that the second sub was gone today, it’s long since been gone, and I can’t launch it alone anyway. The stuff I found...Jenkins’s watch, Rhys’s horrible little brand of hairgel, Schumacher’s chair, right where everyone leaves everything. Their spare stashes of underwear, too; not much fits, but I’ve made do.

There will be energy still; generators bolted to the vents, gaining and maintaining power for so long as they keep running. Desalination plants, that give me water enough to bathe in and drink, all without my maintenance. I can adjust them, I can make demands, but...

I sit on my heels and I pray for rescue.

---

I sit on my heels as I pray for rescue. I’m getting paler every day; when they haul me up I’ll probably burst into flames from the sun. Swear I can see my veins sometimes. It feels like there’s people out there sometimes. Wish I could just slap on a wetsuit and head out there, but the pressure wouldn’t do me any favors. I’m staying active instead, running sprints, trying to remember what stretches help. Calisthenics, right? Is that what it’s called? Keeping my everything in… in shape. The protein powder’ll help too! Maybe Chase’ll think it’s sick when I show up just completely roided up. Mr. Mechanic, I need to get jacked. Hulk Hogan type body.

Good lord, I’ll never get American Made out of my head now…

Maybe I should try writing my own.

What was that Sherlock Holmes thing, learning new things that aren’t essential shoves old things out of the mind? I forgot my phone number today. Finally remembered which doors lead to the chemical storage straight from my room, though, so that has to be connected.

---

I sit as I heal and I pray for rescue. No fat to make soap; I've cut off all I care to of my own. The water will do. It’s done enough, it’ll do more, but somehow it got a little sweet. It’s enough. My food’s getting low enough to carry all together, the sixth month has to be up sooner than later. That’s good though! As long as I ration it properly, I can make it two more months. Exercise’s paying off; I found a spare propeller in one of the crawlspaces earlier and, wouldn’t you know, it’s light enough to use as a baton! I...do need to be careful, though. Scarred the ceiling a couple times. If enough damage happens, the air’ll all get out, and the facility’ll become one big water damage souffle. All the salt’ll kill my plants too.

Humans go insane without plants, so really, I’m lucky I’m alone here. Rhys’d kill the whole crop and put his head through the window by the end of week 1.

I sit and this heals and I pray for rescue. I tried drinking the hair gel and, honestly, it helped. I feel crisper. Sleeker! Like a cat. I can get a cat someday, can’t I? It kind of feels like there’s some of them outside. I swear I can hear coyotes out there sometimes, yowling in groups of three that prance around the station. Sometimes, I can see them. But I can cover the portholes and keep them away. It’s not like any light’s getting through anyway.

---

I sit, and I heel, and I prey for rescue.

---

And I pray, and prey, and pray, and prey, because God will feed me soon. My family will come and feed me soon. I can almost see them out there, in a tin can just like my own, reaching out for me. I wish I knew what it’ll look like. I should greet them. I should swim out and greet them.

Fuck, I wish I could swim out. When they pull me out of this, I’ll have to go through decompression, and...hell, I’ll be grateful. The pressure down here gets so bad I can barely walk anymore. That’s why nobody’s found me, it has to be, I’m just so close to the earth’s core that gravity’s pulling me down. It’s useful for praying, though. My legs don’t get numb anymore.

Is god feeding me?

---

I... I looked in the mirror today. I...

My eyes are gone.

---

I’m still human, aren’t I? I....

Something happened to me. Something...happened...to me, but.

But I tried it out. It’s been forever since I spoke to someone else but I can still sing my prayers. So I tried it. Went...went back to a mirror and looked at.

Myself.

I can still speak.

Hey, how are you, my name is Janet, I’m a human being, just like you. I was left here. Something happened to me. I’m doing alright but I’d like to try...a cupcake. Some apples. Anything edible that wasn’t meat. I... these teeth, the teeth I have left are-- no, looking closely, my molars are still there, it’s just that the front ones got...longer... I. Those....weren’t my hands, though.

I... I don’t think I want to look in the mirror anymore.

But if I can speak! I can shout, even, I can still manage a great big HIIII HELLOOOO NICE TO SEE YOUUU that echoes through the whole station! So they won’t shoot me! I’ll just...stay a bit away from the front door, and greet them, and ask that they don’t shoot me, and say my name and maybe some identifying characteristics. Like...like cheating at the mile run in the third grade and crying to my parents about it.

If they do bring guns... I don’t think I can run anymore.

So...so, I kneel, and pray, that they’ll bring me home.

#thallassal horror #body horror #halloween #mutation #deep sea #biotober #creative writing #writers on tumblr #writing #ocean horror #my writing

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mateusboga · 1 year

Text

Characterization Exercise for T&Z

THIAN:

I wake up with a rumble in my stomach. I lift my arm to try and reach my RCD, but I barely have the strength to do that. “Kalipso, what time is it?” My vox assistant responds, in a synthetically sweet voice: “Good evening, Thian. It is 16:49.” I groan, rolling around in my sheets. I overslept again. I feel like if somebody stabbed me right now I wouldn’t protest. Maybe I would even thank them. But I have nobody to give me that coup de grace I desperately need. Minutes pass, or hours, I don’t know anymore. I eventually get up and go to the bathroom. I turn on my chamber and my computer, the usual ritual, and it would take little to call it satanic all things considered. Oh yes, the rumble in my stomach. I forgot to eat. Again. I put on some less disgusting clothes and get out of my apartment to go get some “fresh” GulgSok. Usual blend. I drink the green liquid. The chemically enhanced flavor is barely noticeable to me anymore, just tastes like tap water with gasoline and sugar. It does make my eyes open up a little more though. That’s what I pay them for. I go back home and check my inbox. 15 unread messages from work. Ugh, bosses really must be a different species of human, that do not understand the concept of a “holiday” and need homo sapien interns to feed them pre-masticated worms and wipe their ass. I blast some of those funky emowave riffs that are the only thing keeping me alive at this point. My neighbors should thank me for my new sound-proof walls. I find myself doodling some stupid toons on a blank piece of paper to get me through the awful workload. I hate this fucking job so much, but what can I do? They pay me for my medication, my bills, my chamber, etc. I even have a free VIP helipod travel card for like a million places, but I don’t want to leave the comfort of my room, so that’s useless. I hated living with other people, so having a new apartment where I can be all alone is refreshing in a way. I can thank them for that. But at what cost? What am I even doing with my life? My parents say they’re proud of me, but why do I feel so empty inside? I’m doing alone in a week what a team of 50 people couldn’t do in a year, yet I feel stupid and useless. I look at the awards on my shelf. Dust has settled over them. They’re just pieces of metal anyways. I try to shove away the bad thoughts, I feel that black cloud suffocating me again. I drink the rest of the GulgSok, along with my meds. It helps. I begin the process of entering into my workflow, and once I’m in it, nobody can get me out. The monotony of daily life has a certain bittersweet feeling. I hate it, but I hate it a lot less than the hellish pit inside my mind. May the neo-industrial megalodon wash those thoughts away.

ZARVIN:

I wake up to the rays of sun shining through the polarized glass. I jump out of bed, put on my favorite blouse, pants, kickers, clean my teeth, style my hair, and I’m off to one more trip to the station. In my bag there’s everything I need: my music player, my earphones and my notepad. Instinctively, I grab my RCD, and I stop for a moment. I haven’t used this thing in so long, it’s probably full of unread notifications, a distant relative sharing a holo of their cat dressed as a cowboy, or scam crypto ads. Will it be today that I break my vow and turn it on? No. Not today. I throw it aside, put on my earphones, and step out into the real world. I inhale a bit of the gasses in the air and I feel a convulsion. The pollution is really bad today. Still, I press on. The things this world throws at me don’t phase me anymore. I’ve gotten accustomed to the smell of nitrogen. To the distant, demonic roar of the city. To the sleepless, anxious, or grim faces I see on the street. To the angry yelling of passengers in traffic, and the fights in the bus stop. I have found my way through the monotony of the city, and found my little corners, where some rare quiet beauty still survives. I look at the time and I see I’m early again, so I stop for a few minutes, sitting on some degrading fibrocarbon box, appreciating the old architecture and the plants in a stray garden, yellow from the fumes, but still alive, and for a moment I forget everything. I lose myself in the tiny breeze that gently caresses the leaves, a sweet kiss of courage, inspiring it to not give up, and keep fighting despite it all. Then, a buzzing brings me back to my senses. I look at the bus stop, and I see my railbus departing! Guess I have to wait for the next one. I couldn’t care, though, because I saw an old friend, Martin, sitting on the bench. We talk for a bit, about the new Finglecunk album, then my bus arrives and I have to end it short. The trip to the station is quicker than usual. Perhaps the fumes kept most people at home today. Or maybe it’s some religious holiday I don’t know about. Regardless, I arrive 2 minutes late to work, and I quickly swipe my HoliDeck card and enter the pad. My helipod is waiting for me, with a fresh paint of glittery violet and tan undertones hiding the fact this model is almost 20 years old. I don’t want a new one though. This one works flawlessly, even if it’s a little chunkier than most. Nowadays it’s all AI-assisted and digital. I don’t wish to give the reins of my life to ones-and-zeroes. Luckily, my boss is very patient with me, and she got me a special deal where I get to keep this one but have to pay for the expenses. I enter the cockpit and begin heating the motors. I feel lucky that I have this job, where I get to drive across the skyline for hours, sometimes passing over a surviving patch of bornean forest to go deliver mail to some old lady on the 193rd floor in another city. People make fun of me for liking Gen Alpha, but I don’t get the joke. They have so many stories of the past they can tell us about. Sure, you can read about the Texan-American War on the holodocs or join a simulation of The Tronsborgle Crash in a chamber, but to talk to somebody who was actually alive when these things happened, has memories of the event, and was affected by it directly, is just… different. I can’t explain it well. Even if I could, I feel people wouldn’t listen to me anyways…

#cyberpunk #futuristic #creative writing #character writing

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theramseyloft · 3 years

Text

Beginner’s housing for a pet pigeon

We can go into the complexities involved in housing multiple pigeons at a later time.

Right now, we’re going to focus primarily on setting up for a single bird who is intended to be a companion animal.

The biggest problem you are going to run into is that the housing commercially available for birds is designed either to display a finch or a parrot.

Finch cages make excellent hospital cages for pigeons, but that is their only useful application.

A Hospital cage needs to be small to discourage the bird from moving around too much and doing anything other than eating and drinking, so that their recovery, be that from disease or injury, can progress with as few delays as possible.

A healthy bird cannot tolerate this degree of confinement for long.

Parrot cages are huge and expensive, but too narrow for a pigeon to be physically able to use.

The bare minimum requirements for any cage a pigeon will be housed in for more than an hour a day is that it be two inches wider than the full wingspan of the bird at the narrowest point, to allow their wings at least an inch of clearance on either side.

They are cliff nesters that don’t roost on branches. Round perches hurt their feet, so they need either flat platforms or square perches.

Pigeons cannot climb the way parrots can. They can only walk or fly, and they cannot comfortably fly if their wings will clip into things like hanging toys or ramps.

So they tend to prefer their enclosure be as uncluttered as possible.

Socialization is best done outside the enclosure, so that’s where most of the toys should be.

Dog kennels set up like this one above are kinder to both the pigeons and the wallets of their care taker than pretty much any indoor bird cage available.

A Labrador sized (usually marketed as a “Large”) kennel will fit bird about homer sized and smaller.

Larger breeds or breeds with longer flight and tail feathers will need a larger size as a base line.

These are very simple to modify.

The nest box is a bunny/ferret corner litter box, about $8-10 at most pet shops. Easy to clean and comfortable.

The perch is a garden stake cut to length, about $5 from the garden center at Walmart or a hardware store like Lowes or home Depot.

Honestly, if I had this to do over, the birds would get a wider, shallower food dish.

Pigeons are ground foragers. It’s easier for them to eat comfortably from a shallow dish than a deep one.

The water dish can be as deep as the pigeon can reach the bottom of.

This is the upper level of a ferret nation Double modified for my first breeding pair of Lucerne waaaay back before my loft was built, when I had a grand total of four breeding pair of pigeons and 16 pairs of Ringneck doves.

This one also has a garden steak cut to fit as a perch.

Their nest box is a large dog bowl full of timothy hay.

Notice that this enclosure has a single hanging bell toy exactly at standing head height for the birds, well out of the way of their wings.

This probably looks unbearably spartan, especially if you come form a parrot back ground.

Remember that pigeons cannot climb and will not fly in a space where their wings may bump into clutter.

The cage for an indoor pet pigeon should serve the same function as the kennel does for an indoor dog:

That is NOT where the dog lives!

At most, it’s where they sleep at night, and where a puppy stays when they can’t be supervised until they’ve learned the house rules.

Pigeons are absolutely smart enough to learn house rules just like a dog or cat.

And pet pigeons are happiest when they have the freedom of motion to exercise, play, and interact with their human flock mates at will.

While they can free fly an entire house, a single bedroom is enough space for most breeds to move around happily.

Pigeon proofing is pretty simple.

They aren’t capable of chewing like parrots, so no need to worry about your electrical chords being damaged and your bird giving them self a nasty shock.

They can’t damage wood or drywall or fabric by chewing.

Pigeons don’t eat plants, but do like the feel of ripping them and will use strips of leaves as nest bedding, so house plants may need to be protected by glass covers.

Things displayed on shelves in the room or rooms the pigeon will have access to need to be heavy enough or well enough wedged in that the bird can’t pull them down if they land awkwardly on them or push them off if they bump into or try to squeeze past them.

Papers need to be stored where they won’t be scattered by the wind that their powerful wings kick up in flight.

Any crevices too high or awkward for you to easily clean need to be blocked some how.

Poop is simple.

The poop of a well fed, healthy pigeon with a good diet should be round and solid enough that it can be easily picked up with a square of toilet paper or a tissue when wet or vacuumed up when dry.

Once you know your bird’s favorite perches, you can make clean up even easier on yourself by laying down puppy pads under them that you can just change out as often as needed.

Once a pigeon has mastered the house rules, you can do away with the cage entirely.

This is the feeding station we set up for Ankhou and Bird-bird.

On the little feed tray for cats were the feeder and waterer with oystershell offered free choice from a dish between them.

Pigeons are one of the very few animals that recognize their reflection in the mirror as a a reflected view of themselves, instead of another bird.

Most like to practice dancing, strutting, their sweeping charge, and bow-cooing in front of mirrors, so those are excellent enrichment for them.

Being cliff nesters, bricks are simply the most comfortable thing for a pigeon to stand on.

Strutting back and forth on the rough surface in front of a mirror will help them keep their claws blunted.

The bricks are holding down a crinkle sack for cats, laid out flat.

Pigeons love noise stims. Particularly crinkly, jingly, or chiming.

The noise it made made dancing in front of the mirror extra fun on the crinkle mat.

The dead keyboard serves a similar function.

This beans box from Walmart full of straw served as Bird-Bird’s nest box.

She laid eggs fairly regularly, and slept in there most of the time.

Ankhou was a man of simple tastes.

This baby doll blanket on the nightstand at my bedside was where he slept at night.

Social bird was social and wanted to be as close as possible to us at all times and involved somehow in everything we did.

Pigeons like to take baths, and our free flying pet liked to be offered the opportunity to take one when we showered, but did not like to actually be in the shower with us.

So we got him a little pyrex casserole dish about as long as he was that stayed on the side of the bathtub and made a habit of filling it for him before we got into the shower.

Anhkou didn’t care much for forage pans or puzzle toys, but many pigeons do and they are very simple to make.

A pan or tray with a few fists full of straw, paper strips, sand, or a mix of all three with a high value treat like Safflower seeds sprinkled in to find mimics the way rock doves would forage for seed in the wild.

Puzzle feeders for pigeons are as simple to make as crumpling a sheet of paper with a few high value seeds inside.

Pigeons love crinkly sounds and tugging on the crumpled paper or blowing it around by flapping at it will reward them with a few spilled seeds and a fun noise.

The little wicker balls for kitties with a jingle bell inside complete the holy trinity of stick-texture, shiny, and jingly, and many pigeons love to kick, peck, and toss them.

They like to pick up and shake and toss bread ties with a small jingle bell fastened to the end.

Bird-Bird’s favorite toy was the bell intended to go on a kittens collar.

She liked to strut around with it holding it by the loop by which it was supposed to fasten and very softly jingling it.

Q-tips with the cotton tips removed and toothpicks with blunted or clipped ends are basically pigeon Legos.

Miniature wind chimes like this little angel and her harp are fun auditory stims too.

If you can swing it (ha!), pigeons enjoy swings, as long as the perch is flat.

Experiment with your birds and see what kind of enrichment they enjoy. ^v^

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starshipsofstarlord · 3 years

Text

Legs

Pairing | Brie Larson x reader

Summary | your housemate Brie wants to be left alone so that she can focus on doing yoga, however, you want her to pay attention to you.

Warnings | includes smut, tribbing, sexual tension, mouth spitting, swearing

Requested ✖️

Quick link to my masterlist, if you’re interested in reading more of my crap 😬

Situating her leg into a stretched position, Brie strained her muscles upon the yoga mat, positioning her arms in front of her, as her air pods played her playlist for these particular workouts.

Though, with her music blaring directly into her ear canal, she could not hear your footsteps streak through the hallway, as you carried the bag of groceries.

As you peeked into the living room, you licked your lips at the sight of your roommate, there was sweat straining in the dips of her muscles, and she absentmindedly licked some that was resting on the top of her lip.

Brie looked good, it had always been clear that she was fuelled by her work and career to stay in shape, but damn.

Tilting your head, your heart almost jumped out of your chest as her face turned towards you, surprised by her blatant expression that had seemingly sensed your presence all along.

Shaking your head, you left the room, going to put away the groceries, and take a cold drink of water, to cool yourself off, despite the lack of exercise that you had committed to.

As you were gulping and quenching your thirst that the sight of your roommate had brought on, you heard the kitchen door open, and in policy, you turned, watching as Brie damped her towel, and patted her forehead with it. It was as though she has forgotten that there was a bathroom just the room beside.

“It’s rude to stare y/n.” She cocked her brow at you, watching as you tensed up at her words. “If you wanted me to teach you yoga, you could have just asked.”

A smirk riddled its way onto her face, causing your breath to hitch, knowing that she was teasing you, and was getting a hell of a kick out of it.

“Yeah, that’s what I wanted.” You bit your lip, feeling your veins flush with surpassed embarrassment. “I have groceries to put away though, so maybe another time.”

“Or you could join me afterwards, and I can show you the way to bend your body into the correct positions. But if not, then I suggest you don’t disturb me again, otherwise it won’t be worthwhile.”

She reached into the paper bag, pulling out an apple, biting in it, before walking away with it in her hand, leaving you once more to your lonesome.

Altogether, her exit was a relief and a displeasure. You pondered on her previous words as you grabbed each individual item, putting it where it belonged, before you concluded yourself to a great decision.

You would accompany her in the ways of bodily art, and learn how to cope with seeing so much of her skin and restraining from doing anything rash.

You hung your coat up by the front door, before going to your room to change into more flexible attire. Brie did not seem surprised in the slightest to see that you had indeed taken her up on the offer, and chosen to join her.

“What do I do?” You asked her, paying much attention to the way she splayed her strong legs far behind herself, managing to balance her weight with their self forced partition.

In attempt, you tried to shadow her movements, copying them with your own limbs, you could only imagine how awkward you looked whilst doing so.

There was no coordination within your movements, which caused Brie to incessantly roll her eyes at you.

That made you more aware of what you were doing, and thus, you tried to change the direction of your knees, causing the blonde to audibly sigh.

“Let me help you, then we might actually get somewhere.” The actress insisted, collapsing her form so that she could sit beside you, as she grasped at your hips, roughly moving them to tilt upwards.

The action on her part caused a moan of emotional surrender to pivot out your lips, and once you realised what you had just done, your eyes went wide.

However, Brie remained the same, still touching you as she stroked her marvellous hands across your waist, that was slumping under her physical pressure.

“You have great structure, if you had been silent for the last few months, maybe I’d have noticed. Perfect for doing more than yoga.”

“Are you hitting on me?” The question came out as a sonorous gasp, Brie’s hands raking down to drag over your ass, causing you to lose your balance, and flop against the floor.

If the situation was any different, you were sure that you’d feel embarrassed though right now, you were more focused on how tentative she was treating your body.

It was no secret, that when you had first decided to room within the same residence, the two of you happened to clash. At first, you had thought it to be your personalities repelling each other’s, yet after time, it became clear that the two of you easily managed to frustrate the other.

And soon it became clear that such annoyance has turned into a sexual categorisation of stress, it flowering like a budding rose, naturally consuming itself in the air with its scent, although, the affects pricked like the rope of thorns, leaving you with a false facade of resentment towards the beauty of your two’s relationship.

“Always so naive, and I think instead of bracing me with various, pointless and dumb questions, you should do as I say, and keep quiet, unless you are moaning for me. Am I understood y/n?”

Biting back a whimper, you nodded, bracing yourself on your forearms as you rolled over to be on your back, closely watching her and whatever she had in mind.

“Take that sports bra off, it’s doing nothing for your figure.” Her tone was more of a snap, her penetrating eyes scouring into you as you did as she asked, lifting the article of clothing over your head, and tossing it onto her yoga mat.

Next your leggings were told to be dismissed of, causing you to become very aware of how you ahead decided to forgo panties, having priorly thought of how you it had entered your mind that it would be easier to move into tight and confusing positions if you were bare underneath.

And in some way you had been right, considering that you were being told to strip anyways. It seemed that Brie seemed rather impressed to see your cunt uncovered.

She licked her lips, and for a moment, you thought that she was going to move forwards, and eat you. But you found yourself to be rather wrong, when she pushed you down, and straddled you.

Her head moved down, suffocating your mouth with her own. Using her tongue, she pried past your lips, enforcing you to moan within her mouth, frowning as she leant back, only to grasp the sides of your mouth, and drop a bead of spit into it.

Without any hesitation, you swallowed, hardly keeping your mouth closed as she trailed her fingertips down, only to rub circles upon your clit, making your body writhe from the stimulated sensation. “Brie- fuck.”

“Want me to show you my favourite position?” She asked endearingly, and for just a second, you were confused, thinking that the two of you had moved past the concept of yoga.

And then you realised, when she unclothed herself, leaving you in a state of admirable awe, what the position was. Brie pushed your legs to acquire her body between, turning it to the side, as she raised her cunt directly over yours.

Slowly she lowered herself, situating her pussy against yours, both of your clits evoking a wave of sincere pleasure out of you. Her leg went over the top of your thigh, planting it on the ground beside, rutting her hips to blend your juices in a sweet matrimony.

“I always knew you’d feel this good.” Brie huffed, placing her hands upon both of your tits, one on each, to aid herself with leverage for her movements.

A slight sound could be heard, induced by the pressing of your cunts, as she rode your cunts, your lips spread open by her own. It coaxed noises of complete euphoria out of you, as you tugged on your own hair, almost pulling a few strands out.

“Holy shit Brie, so fuckin’ good. Mmm.” A light scream stumbled out of your moth afterwards, being a say all to you being close to reaching your peak.

“Be a good girl and cum. Cum you annoying bitch.” She squeezed your breasts harsher, bringing you somewhat pain, as you fell over the edge. “Good girl baby, so wet.”

She ground harder, until she too released upon your pussy, giving a couple more fluid motions until she moved off of you, pulling her juicy cunt away from your own, and rolling beside you, going to tug her clothes on. “We may have to practice yoga together more often.”

“Yeah.” You muttered, finally upholding your tight grasp upon your hair. It was a definite consumption to satisfy your frustration with her again, after all, you were roommates, and that meant plenty of opportunities.

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fortuositywritings · 3 years

Text

I Said No (Wanda x R): Pt 6

Summary: You kissed Wanda. Where do you go from here? Camping. You go camping is where.

Challenge: Take a shot of preferred drink (water for you youngsters, stay hydrated) every time you read "s'mores".

Pt. 1, Pt. 2, Pt. 3, Pt. 4, Pt. 5

Wanda is beyond frustrated. It has been eight hours since you kissed her on the ferris wheel. Eight painful hours of rewinding the moment in her mind over and over again, wondering what it means because you haven’t said anything about it. You acted no different when you met back with everyone else. No different when Laura asked with a knowing smile how the view was from the top. No different on the car ride home nor when you said goodnight to her like you did to everyone else even if she had lingered behind a little longer in case you maybe wanted to say something while no one else was near.

It’s like it never even happened and now she’s wondering if she’s somehow messing with her own mind.

No, it definitely happened. Maybe there’s a reason. Maybe you’ll explain. Maybe she needs to sleep.

She can feel Nat stirring beside her, signaling her to close her eyes and feign sleep.

“I know you’re awake, Wanda. You’re going to have to do better than that,” Nat says. Wanda huffs. She should know better than try to pretend in front of the spy. “What’s wrong? You’ve been tossing and turning all night.”

Wanda doesn’t think Nat would like to hear the reason for her restlessness, but she also knows she can’t get away with lying, so she chooses to say, “I don’t think you would want to know.”

“Wanda,” Nat sighs, almost defeatedly, “I know I have my reservations about you and Y/N but I meant what I said. You are both adults who can make your own choices and if this is really something you both want then I’ll be here for you and her both. I know you might not believe this, but I’d much rather be here to help you prove me wrong than you two go and prove me right.”

Nat is lying on her back now staring at the ceiling waiting patiently for Wanda to say something. Wanda follows Nat’s lead and stares at the blank ceiling trying to get her thoughts in order. Wanda doesn’t like talking about her feelings. She’s one to figure things out on her own but if she doesn’t get answers soon, she is going to go insane. Nat knows Y/N well enough. Maybe she knows why Y/N acted so indifferent. So Wanda decides to trust Nat. “She kissed me.”

Wanda turns her head to see Nat’s expression. Nat’s face remains stoic. “Are you mad?” Wanda asks warily.

“No, but I am surprised,” Nat says with what Wanda could swear is amusement. “I didn’t think she had it in her to go against anything Clint or I say.”

Wanda smiles, “You don’t give her enough credit.”

“Maybe. I think I also give you too much credit. I thought it would be you to do it. You Maximoffs tend to be relentless until you get what you want.” Wanda chuckles acknowledging that sometimes she and her brother annoy the rest of the team until things go their way. “So she kissed you. What’s the problem?”

Wanda’s good mood comes back down as she falls back to reality. “I don’t know if there is a problem is the problem,” Wanda groans in frustration.

“You’ve lost me.”

Wanda can’t have this conversation lying down so she sits up. Nat does the same, giving Wanda her full attention. “It’s just, it’s so push and pull with her. She flirts and I flirt back. Then she says she can’t so I let it go, but later she pulls me in again but then reminds me we can only be friends only to kiss me at the fair. And now she’s acting like it didn’t even happen and it’s all so frustrating,” Wanda vents.

Nat takes a moment to process everything. “You have to keep in mind that Y/N doesn’t do the whole relationship thing. She tried it once and well it didn’t work out. Now when things get serious, she likes to ignore them or as I’m sure you’ve noticed she likes to joke her way out. So if you want to work this out, you’ll have to find a way to talk to her without her freaking out,” Nat advises.

The mention of a past relationship piques Wanda’s interest. “Y/N’s been in a relationship before? She’s never mentioned it.”

Nat smirks shaking her head, “Of course out of everything I said, that’s what you got. Tell me, have you told her about the robot boyfriend you had not too long ago?” Wanda looks down at the bedsheets in embarrassment. Nat wants to laugh but decides to give Wanda a break. “Look, if you really want to know you can ask Y/N later, okay? Now get some rest. You shouldn’t let guy, girl, or robot problems keep you from sleeping,” she finishes chuckling and gets up from the bed.

“Where are you off to?” Wanda still goes to lie down but looks up at Nat with tired eyes.

“Going to go for a hike with your girl,” Nat teases as she grabs her clothes and clothes for you.

“She’s not my girl,” Wanda says, tucking her head into her pillow to hide her blush but Nat still caught it. She also catches when Wanda mumbles, “yet.”

“And there’s that bratty Maximoff attitude. I see you’re feeling better now,” Nat laughs and leaves the room without giving Wanda the time to respond, not that Wanda was planning to because Nat was right. Wanda was feeling better now having talked it out with someone. She’ll do as Natasha said and ask you later. With that she closes her eyes and tries to get some sleep.

You didn’t fare too well last either, much like Wanda. You were trying so hard not to think about your kiss with Wanda, but it’s all you could think about. You don’t know what possessed you to do it, but you know you should not have done it. You should not have done it because now all you can think about is doing it again, about doing it again and letting her kiss you back. You shouldn’t have kissed her because you don’t want to get anyone’s hopes up, including yourself. It’s happened to you once before and you’re scared because it is happening to you again.

So, you tried to play it cool. If you act like it was a friendly kiss that didn’t really mean anything, then Wanda will take the hint and when she inevitably goes, so will your feelings. No harm done. Friends kiss sometimes, right? At least that’s what you’ve been trying to convince yourself all night until you fell asleep.

You awaken from your two hours of Wanda-filled dreams by gym clothes smacking your face. You groan, “No, please. Not today, Nat. I barely got any sleep last night.”

“Oh, not you too,” she comments, rolling her eyes at you. You lift your head at that to look at her confused by what she meant. “Come on, some exercise will take your mind off whatever kept you up,” she continues with a knowing smile as she takes a sip of her coffee. You narrow your eyes at her but eventually give in. Maybe she’s right and it will help you take your mind off of Wanda for even a moment.

You still need the energy though, so you steal her coffee as you pass by her with your clothes in hand.

The one time you actually hoped Nat would be right, she wasn’t. You’re an hour into your hike and your brain has no vacancy for anything other than Wanda. You want to scream. Instead you push yourself harder. Another hour goes by and your head is still spinning, except this time it might also be because of the lack of oxygen reaching your brain. You go to lay on the dirty ground and attempt to catch your breath. Nat stops, not hearing your footsteps behind her.

She looks at you a little worried. You are heaving and you are sweaty and you are frustrated and it’s official; a pretty girl named Wanda Maximoff broke you. You start chuckling and soon a full resounding laugh comes out of you like you heard the funniest joke. Nat goes to sit by you warily but doesn’t say anything.

Your laughter dies, replaced by a solemn attitude. You sit up, your shoulder touching Nat’s. She still doesn’t say anything and you’re thankful for that. Without looking at her, you tell her earnestly, “I really like her.”

“Yeah, I know,” she sighs.

“She told you,” you say, no surprise in your voice. You were clued in this morning with Nat’s knowing smile. Nat hums in confirmation. “I know you and Clint warned me, but-”

“But we were wrong,” Nat cuts you off. That has you looking at her, your eyebrows raised in shock. You never thought you’d hear her admit being wrong so blatantly. She laughs, “Don’t get used to hearing that. Seriously though, you don’t need someone telling you what you can or cannot do. It wasn’t right for us to try. So, I’ll tell you what I told Wanda, whatever happens, I’ll be here if you need me.”

“Aww, look who’s taking accountability. Little Romanov is all grown up!” you joke. She rolls her eyes and nudges you saying, “I guess serious talk is over.”

She knows you too well. You smile anyway in appreciation. You both get up and start making your way back to the car. You feel lighter after that conversation. On your walk back, you begin to think, maybe you can give it a shot with Wanda now that it seems Nat and Clint are giving into the idea of you two together. You smile at the thought of you and Wanda together. You can make it work, you think. That is if you can allow trust in yourself to not hurt her and trust her not to do the same. But you have time to work on that.

When you reach the car, a daunting thought stops you. You don’t have time. “She’s leaving soon.”

Nat opening the car door simply says, “Yeah, guess you have to decide what you want to do quickly.”

“I’ve decided,” Clint says to everyone at breakfast. When you and Nat had gotten to the house, almost everyone was still asleep. You and Nat only saw Sam and Laura up in the kitchen. You’d guessed the fair wore everyone out yesterday. You and Nat helped Sam and Laura make breakfast. Well, Nat helped. You had been told to sit at the table and let the adults do the cooking. How were you meant to learn if they didn’t let you? At least Wanda had let you help.

Wanda, as if summoned by your thoughts, had appeared then. You saw her hesitate walking into the kitchen. You knew you messed up by ignoring what happened between the two of you. You gave her a smile and patted the seat next to you hoping to alleviate the tension. Luckily for you it seemed to do the trick. You two were back to your usual selves though you both knew you would have to talk about what happened at some point.

Everyone came downstairs one by one and when breakfast was ready, you all headed into the dining room to eat together. Everyone was having their own side conversations but they all hushed down when Clint spoke up saying he decided something.

“And what did you decide?” Laura asks him. You try hard not to laugh, recognizing the same tone she gave you two days ago when you told everyone you were going to the fair. Wanda sees you try to hide your amusement and pinches your side to get you to stop. Being ticklish, you nearly squeal but hold it in. By the way Wanda’s eyes spark up, you know she noticed. You give her a warning stare and mouth “no”.

“My sweet, beautiful wife,” Clint begins sweet talking your cousin, but you’re not paying too much attention as Wanda is trying to tickle your side discreetly with one hand and you are trying hard to keep it away. Across the table, Pietro is not paying attention to Clint either, instead watching you and Wanda interact. He feels so dumb for not noticing it before, but seeing you bring out the playfulness in Wanda, which he hadn’t seen in the longest time, you could make him feel like the dullest bulb in the box and he wouldn’t complain. All three of your attention is brought back to the subject at hand when Clint says, “I’ve decided we’re going camping today!”

The kids, Peter, Sam, and you let out a cheer. You squeeze Wanda’s hand that you managed to catch in yours. You don’t feel any excitement coming from her so you turn to her. She looks discontent at the thought of camping. “Oh, come on. Don’t say you don’t like camping.”

“Pietro and I have not gone camping but the thought of bugs and sleeping on the ground does not sound appealing,” she says tentatively.

“Thank you. She gets it,” your cousin says and Nat nods her head in agreement.

“Don’t listen to the two buzzkills. They never want to do anything.” You ignore the scoff and “excuse me” they give you to instead try to convince Wanda. “I promise it’s going to be fun,” you look into her eyes, practically pleading with her. She huffs, closes her eyes, and says, “Fine.”

“Yes! What about you Pietro?” you ask her brother though you already know where one twin goes the other follows. “Yeah, let’s see what camping is about. Maybe we can share a tent,” Pietro flirts throwing a wink your way, mostly teasing to see his sister’s reaction. You ignore his last comment and start chanting “Camping! Camping!” until Peter, Cooper, and Lila chant along. You don’t notice the glare Wanda throws her brother or said brother trying to hide his smirk.

You take two cars like you had yesterday. This time you ride with Nat, Sam, Wanda, and Peter. Cooper and Lila refused to let Pietro ride in Nat’s car, wanting him to ride with them. Nat is driving with Sam sitting in the passenger seat after having called shotgun. You sat in the middle between Peter and Wanda, having offered her the window seat. The ride to the lake where you usually went camping isn’t long, only about an hour and a half away, but you find yourself falling asleep twenty minutes in when Wanda rests her head on your shoulder to take a nap.

You and Wanda wake to the car door slamming shut. You both look out the window and see you’ve arrived and it had been Nat who stepped out of the car. From the car, you can see her stretch and take in the view with a disgruntled face.

“Well someone’s excited,” Sam said sarcastically, having noticed Nat’s attitude toward this trip also. All of you in the car watch her as she sprays a ton of bug repellant on herself while grumbling, “Stupid Clint. I should be relaxing somewhere with AC. But nooo, Mr. ‘I’ve decided we’re going camping’ and Ms. ‘I promise it’s gonna be fun’ want to go camping. Fun my ass.”

You can’t help but laugh when she mocks you and Clint, and everyone in the car joins in. Nat turns to glare at all of you through the windows. “Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up. Just don’t come crying to me when you can’t stop scratching your legs tomorrow. Now chop chop. We’ve got things to bring out.”

She leaves to help Laura out of the family car that just pulled up beside Nat’s own. She’s always so grumpy when you go camping. At the thought, a joke pops in your head that you can’t help but repeat out loud, “Yeah, she’s never really been a happy camper.”

“Did you just? Nice one!” Peter gives you a high five. Wanda and Sam shake their heads at you but you can see Wanda trying not to smile. Sam catches it and throws his head back groaning, “Bad puns? Really? I gotta start writing things down.” He pulls out his phone and goes to his notes to start a list. “Okay, confident but geeky, talk about Star Wars, bad jokes. Am I missing anything, Wanda?”

You and Peter look at her confused. You are especially intrigued to know what Wanda has to do with whatever the hell Sam is talking about when she flushes and kicks his seat. “We should go help now,” she says, opening the door and hurrying out. You follow behind asking, “What’s he talking about, Wanda?”

She ignores you. Peter reaches you and says, “I thought it was a good joke.”

Everyone helps out setting the tents, Clint wanting to get that out of the way first. No matter how much of a downer Nat can be on camping trips, you’re always glad she’s there or no tent would stand a chance holding upright. There are three sturdy tents set up a little ways away from the dock by the time you finish. Peter, the kids, the twins, and you run over to the dock in excitement, you pulling Wanda along with you. None of you are in the proper attire to jump in as Laura points out. “Hey, go put on your swim suits if you want to get in!” she shouts from where the rest are setting up everything for grilling.

You all turn back around to put on your swimwear. Best not to anger the pregnant lady. Before you can take a step forward, you feel like someone sweeps you up in their arms but it happens too fast to be sure and suddenly you are falling into the water. Everyone turns back around at the sound of you hitting the water. When your head springs from the water, you look for the culprit and see him smiling at you next to Sam. You do the only thing you can think of as revenge. You pretend to drown. “Help! I can’t-” you spit water everywhere waving your arms hysterically. You can hear footsteps running on the dock but ignore them to see Pietro’s reaction. His eyes widen and in a blink he is gone.

You hear a splash. Correction, you hear three different splashes. You knew one had to be Pietro and you’re right. He pulls you into him with one arm, saying, “I got you. I got you.”

You turn in his arm and say, “No, I got you.” He looks confused and you take the opportunity to wriggle loose and dunk his head in the water. The second and third splashes had come from Peter and Wanda, you note, when you hear them behind you say, “Y/N!” and “Are you okay?” You can’t answer because the sight of Pietro coming back up spluttering has you cracking up.

“I thought you couldn’t swim,” Peter says. This time you do answer, “I told you guys, I was learning on the job.”

Peter starts laughing then, swimming towards Pietro, who took it easy laughing as well. “She got you so good. You should have seen your face,” Peter chuckles. You grin, but that smile falls when you look at Wanda and find her glaring at you.The joy on your face morphs into confusion. You ask, “What’s wrong?”

“That wasn’t funny, Y/N.” She leaves you there with your mouth agape and heads to the shore without another word, swimming past Peter and Pietro who are basically water fighting. You float there for a second wondering what just happened. You don’t know what to do but you think you have to fix it somehow.

You swim after her. Pietro and Peter stop splashing water at each other, turning their bodies to look at you as you pass by them now able to touch the ground with your feet. Pietro teases, “Oooh, someone’s sleeping on the couch tonight.”

You wanted to point out that you have been sleeping on the couch the whole week and that technically you’ll be sleeping in a tent tonight. Instead you splash some water at him behind you and try to walk faster against the water to catch Wanda. When you are close enough, you reach out and pull on her wrist to get her to stop walking. You walk around her to stand face to face. She pulls her arm free from your hold and crosses her arms in front of her body looking everywhere but at you. You see her clenching her jaw in irritation and if you’re honest with yourself, you find this angry Wanda pretty attractive, but you remember she’s mad at you and you focus on the matter at hand.

Unbeknownst to you both, everyone’s watching. “Oh, she’s mad mad. Let’s see Y/N try to joke her way out of this one,” Sam says chuckling. Clint and Nat turn to him, Nat smirking and Clint chuckling. Laura is preoccupied putting sunscreen on the kids to be aware of what is going on.

“Oh, come on. Sure, Y/N is smooth but I know Wanda, and that girl is stubborn as hell,” Sam says confidently, remembering the time Wanda had not spoken to her brother for three days because he went to a party with some of the guys forgetting he was supposed to go to the movies with her.

“Want to bet?” Clint says.

“20, easy.” Sam shakes Clint’s hand. Off in the water, Peter and Pietro are having a similar conversation. Peter asks if Wanda is actually mad. Peter doesn’t live on the compound and has not had much interaction with Wanda, so it makes sense to Pietro why he would ask. Pietro laughs, “Oh, yes. One time I forgot to go to the movies with her and she did not speak with me for days. She has the same face now.”

You don’t really have a plan here, so you start the way you always do, using humor. “Wanda, are you actually mad? Am I in hot … water?” you flick some water for effect. She doesn’t find it amusing. She scoffs at you, but at least she’s looking at you now. “The water’s cold and jokes won’t get you out of this one.”

“We’ll just have to sea about that,” you try again. You didn’t think she could look more peeved, but look at you making the impossible happen. She says, “It’s a lake,” unamused, and she moves to go around you. So humor is a no go in this situation.

“What did I tell you,” Sam boasts, seeing Wanda look more irritated. “Easiest 20 dollars, I made.”

“Just wait,” Clint says. Laura goes to sit beside him and asks, “What’s happening?”

“Wanda is mad at Y/N. Sam bet Clint 20 dollars that Wanda will stay mad at her,” Nat explains. Suddenly, Sam doesn’t feel so confident when Laura shakes her head at him like he just got played and says, “Oh, Sam.”

“Okay, wait, wait, wait.” You step to the side making sure Wanda doesn’t leave. “I’m sorry. It was just a dumb way to get back at Pietro. I didn’t mean to upset you or freak you out,” you say, pulling her arms apart from where they are still crossed. “The last thing I want to do is make you mad or sad or any of the -ad’s.” You see her tense shoulders loosen up so you add, “You already know how I feel about Brads.”

You know you made the right choice when you hear her giggle at your last comment. You smile and tug on her arm. “So are we good? Or do I have to pull out the famous puppy dog eyes?” you jest and she gives you a real laugh when you actually go for the puppy dog eyes along with a pout. She shoves you playfully and you nearly stumble backwards but you hold onto her arms and pull yourself forward. In consequence you end up closer to each other and Wanda takes the opportunity to pull you into a hug.

“Just don’t do it again,” Wanda says. You wrap your arms around her waist, welcoming in her hug. “Wouldn’t dream of it. Now let’s go swimming,” you say quickly. She barely catches what you say before you pick her up and take off back in Peter and Pietro’s direction, Wanda laughing the whole way.

“What the hell was that?” Sam refuses to believe what he just saw.

“Easiest 20 dollars I ever made,” Clint chuckles.

“No, see she’s gotta have some kind of persuasion powers or something. Why isn’t that girl on the team? We could just give her a microphone before we go fight and have her convince the bad dudes to turn themselves in,” Sam says as he reluctantly takes out a twenty dollar bill and gives it to Clint.

Pietro is very much on the same boat as Sam. He decides he needs to learn your secrets. Peter says, “Maybe the movie she wanted to watch was really good?”

You have your fun in the water, especially when the kids and Sam join you deciding they want to play chicken fight. Cooper goes against Lila and despite her being younger and smaller, she manages to push Cooper off Sam’s shoulder. Pietro holds Sam up as he goes against Peter. Sam cheers when Peter falls backwards into the water. Most would be surprised by the win but it was mostly your fault, not having a good stance when trying to hold Peter on your shoulders.

You go to fight against Wanda next; she takes Sam’s place on Pietro’s shoulders and you sit on Sam’s shoulders. Cooper and Lila count down and when they yell go, you and Wanda are pushing each other’s shoulders. Wanda removes a hand from your shoulder and reaches for your stomach, but you catch her arm quickly. “Not today. You’re going down, Maximoff!”

“Yeah, we’ll see about that-” Wanda begins but doesn’t finish. You can feel her grip loosen on your shoulder when she gives you a look of befuddlement. “Actually, I don’t know your last name.” You smirk, taking this as your opportunity, and say, “Good. Now you can see how I felt.” Then you push her shoulder and she loses her balance. You can smell the victory, but the smell wafts away when you see what looks like a red mist coming from her and hurling towards you. You are practically flung from Sam’s shoulder into the water.

You resurface, spluttering water. You look around for the person of interest and head towards her when she gets up beside Pietro. “You cheated!” you yell. You’re not actually mad but you are a sore loser. She sees you coming toward her and Wanda can’t help but laugh at how silly you look trying to stomp over to her intimidatingly when you are moving so slowly against the water. “I thought you and I had agreed on no powers.”

“No, you said no more mind reading,” she corrects you with a pleased smile on her face.

“Well new rule, no powers in general and wipe that grin off your face, no one likes a smart-ass,” you huff. She replies whilst giving your cheek a poke, “Then wipe that pout off your face. No one likes a sore loser.” You shake your head to get her finger off your face, making her laugh again.

Pietro challenges Wanda next and before either of them have a chance to decide who will be carrying them, you dive under Wanda and between her legs, making her yelp in surprise as you lift her up on your shoulders. You hold on tight to her thighs and then reach for her arms to keep her steady. She giggles when she looks down not able to see you behind all the hair in your face. She helps you out and pulls your hair back out of your face. You look up at her, who keeps her hands on your head, and smile in thanks.

You look at Wanda’s opponent. Pietro, who is situated on Sam’s shoulders, is already looking at you like he’s thinking something over. Then he looks above you at Wanda and challenges, “If I win, you have to tell me what Y/N said to not make you angry anymore.”

Sam under him adds, “Yeah, I wanna know why I lost 20 dollars!” You give him a look of bewilderment. Wanda thinks it over and decides, “Okay, but if I win, Sam has to stop trying to be geeky like Y/N and Peter.” You pinch her thigh and Peter shouts “Hey!” at being called geeky. She ignores the two of you, continuing, “And you have to stop flirting with Y/N.”

“Why? Are you jealous, Wanda?” her brother baits her. Your ears perk up awaiting her response.

“No, you’re just annoying,” Wanda says trying to sound nonchalant, but Pietro knows her well. He continues badgering, “Well, what if Y/N likes it?”

You decide to partake in his teasing her and add, “Yeah, Wanda. What if I like it?” You look up at her with a cheeky smile and find her already looking down at you with an eyebrow raised and her tongue poking at her cheek, a look you feel says “you don’t want to test me”. Gut feelings shouldn’t be ignored, you think, so you look back to Pietro, “Sorry, I guess I don’t like it.” You follow with a dramatic whisper, “Totally jealous.” She tugs your hair in retaliation for your comment.

“So, is it a deal or not, ‘cause my shoulders are starting to hurt,” Sam says. The twins agree and you are thankful Sam got the ball rolling because you didn’t know how much longer you could hold up Wanda. Peter counts down this time. It’s over in less than 3 seconds. It seems Wanda likes to cheat. Everyone sees the red mist fading after Pietro falls into the water.

“That’s not fair. You used your powers. That’s cheating,” Pietro says when he comes back up and Sam nodding in agreement while Wanda defends herself saying they never said they couldn’t use powers. You tell Wanda to take a breath and close her nose and then fall backwards to get her off your shoulders. Another few minutes of swimming pass by before Clint yells for all of you to get out and go eat. You all head to the little cabin that has the restrooms and showers. Laura meets you there with towels. Those of you that jumped in the lake enter the showers with clothes and all to wash away the lake water and then head outside to rinse off.

Clint watches you hand your towel to Wanda for her to dry off first. You say something that makes Wanda let out a resonant laugh and in turn makes you smile vibrantly. He’s only ever seen you look at someone like that once. He grimaces at how that turned out. And Wanda he’s actually never seen act like this, so jubilant and lively, playfully rolling her eyes and pushing you away after you make a stupid joke. It brings a smile to his face despite the voice in the back of his head saying this can’t end well.

As everyone eats, they unintentionally group off to have different conversations. Clint, Sam, and Peter stand by the mini grill, Laura and Nat sit in some camping chairs complaining about the bugs, the kids are drawing things on the ground with a stick they found, and you, Wanda, and Pietro are sitting on other camping chairs.

Pietro and Wanda tell you stories of when they were children, both their eyes seem to almost glaze over as they reminisce on fond memories. Though their storytelling styles differ, Pietro with his animated gestures and Wanda with her attention for detail, they both have you captivated. You offer them a few stories of your own childhood, including the ones you found embarrassing like the three different times you called one teacher “mom” and the time you walked straight into a pole talking to your crush in middle school.

“So you weren’t always so smooth as I hear you are,” Wanda comments through her laughter.

“Nope, this awesome personality took years in the making,” you joke, making Wanda shake her head at you. Pietro comments, “Yeah, not everyone can be born with it like I was.”

Wanda laughs at this, which offends Pietro and soon the twins are bickering much to your amusement. Wanda recounts times Pietro was very much not so smooth with the ladies including things he’s done that caused certain girlfriends to leave him, Pietro obviously having excuses as to why something happened. He fires his shot at her when he tells her she can’t begin to talk about relationships when she’s only had one and it was 3D printed.

You tune them out after this due to shock and confusion. You’re shocked that Wanda’s only ever dated one person. You never really thought to ask about her exes because you thought it might bring up some bad memories knowing she had just gone through a breakup not so long ago. So you also find it shocking that she was so brazenly forward about wanting to try something with you if she doesn’t date like her brother does-like you do which you don’t even consider dating. You kind of want to smile thinking about it. You just know that she has people left and right who would kill for a chance to be with her, but she likes you. You are trying hard not to let it go to your head but can already feel your ego growing in size. The confusion comes from the 3D printed comment. You’ll have to ask about that later.

“-ask Y/N.” You bring your attention back to the conversation when hearing your name.

“She doesn’t do relationships. She’s too busy playing the game and winning,” Sam chuckles standing between the twins’ chairs. You hadn’t even noticed when he joined you three. You don’t know where they were in the conversation and don’t want to explain what you were thinking about if you ask them to repeat the question because you were distracted, so you decide to go along with Sam. You fake a laugh and say, “Yeah, tried it once and it wasn’t for me.”

“You? In a relationship?” You nod at both of Pietro’s questions. “With who?”

“Her name’s Skye and no, she doesn’t live here so don’t try going around town asking about her. I may not have known you for long, but I can just tell you’re both nosy.” You point at Pietro and Sam.

“Then don’t leave us wondering. What happened?” Sam asks. From the look in his eye, you know he won’t let it go. You don’t feel like recounting the details of how you were falling for someone who left you saying they couldn’t do relationships because they were distracting her from trying to do something important. It was a blow to the gut then; you’re sure your face would show it. You don’t want to be a drag.

“Nothing exciting. She told me relationships weren’t for her at the time,” you say nonchalantly, shrugging your shoulders like it doesn’t still hurt to think about.

“So you decided relationships weren’t for you,” Wanda speaks up, her stare hard on your profile like she’s trying to figure you out. You think she reads you too well already, there can’t be anything you hide that she won’t find.

“If you can’t beat them, join them,” you say, trying to look unfazed by it all. It seems to work because the guys move on, Sam joking saying that was the reason you partnered with Wanda after you lost the chicken fight. Wanda, however, is still staring at you, trying to decipher your words. You try not to focus on that. The guys laugh when you say that technically you won because Wanda cheated using her powers.

“So it is cheating! If you say you won, that means Sam and I won, so Sam can try to be geeky and I can flirt with you and you have to tell us how Wanda’s mood changed so fast,” Pietro says matter-of-factly. Now this gets Wanda to quit staring at you. Instead she turns her head to Pietro to give him a glare when he mentions flirting with you. You don’t know too much about Wanda’s powers but you would not be surprised if one was killing someone with a look; Pietro would be pulverized from being on the receiving end of her glare and you from how attractive you found it.

But now is not the time. As much as it hurts your ego that has now flown through the roof, you reach your foot over to loop your ankle around Wanda and say to Pietro, “Okay, then I didn’t win. It was a draw.” Wanda turns her attention back over to you when she feels your ankle against hers.

“Oh, come on! Just tell us how you did it,” Sam says.

“Guess she just likes me more than you two,” you offer with a cheeky smile. You miss Wanda blushing when Sam says, “That’s for sure.” You didn’t even catch that because the smell of marshmallows roasting called you. You look over Sam’s shoulder and see Clint helping Cooper and Lila make a s’more. You notice Peter talking to Nat and Laura sitting around a small makeshift fire pit starting to poke marshmallows on the ends of some steel sticks Clint must have bought. “Um, what the hell, guys? Was no one going to call us for s’mores?” you yell more so towards your cousin.

Everyone turns to look at you but your group who look over to see the reason you were yelling. Your cousin gives you a well-job-done look when Lila says, “Ooo, Y/N said a bad word.” As your group heads over to the rest, you give your cousin your don’t-worry-I’ll-fix-it look you’ve given her countless times and tell Lila, “Yes, I did but you can’t. Not until you’re ten.”

“Y/N!” Both Clint and Laura yell while Nat actually tries to fix it and says, “Y/N was just being funny. Don’t listen to her.”

“But you say Y/N is never funny,” Cooper chimes in. Everyone stifles a laugh when you scoff. “That’s because your Aunt Nat wouldn’t know a joke if it bit her in the ass,” you say the last part directly looking at her. You hear Clint say something like “not this again” while most are saying “oooh” including the kids but they say it to point out you said another bad word.

“I don’t know about that one. Why don’t you bite mine and I’ll tell you?” Nat comes back at you and so do the oohs from everyone and a bonus “burn” from Sam. You reply, “No, thank you. Wouldn’t want to accidentally bite into the stick stuck up there.”

“DAMN!” Sam says and before Nat could respond from what you’re sure would be what ends you tonight, your cousin cuts in. “Enough! I thought I would be raising 3 children. I didn’t sign up for 5. Lila, don’t listen to Y/N about the bad words and if she and Aunt Nat keep arguing,” your cousin threatens, “neither will be having s’mores.”

Both your and Nat’s eyes go wide at that. One thing you and she will never argue about is how s’mores are one of the greatest contributions the US has given the world in terms of culinary delicacies.

“That got them quiet very fast. How good can s’mores be?” Pietro asks. You and Nat gasp so dramatically one would think Pietro insulted your mothers. “You’ve never had a s’more?” you ask both him and Wanda who shake their heads.

“Why was I never made aware of this?” Nat reprimands them as if it’s the twins’ fault they’ve never had s’mores. “Someone get these two a stick and some marshmallows ASAP,” Nat snaps, and you fetch four sticks and the bag of marshmallows, handing Nat, Pietro, and Wanda a stick each.

“Prepare to have your mind blown,” you say dramatically. Wanda finds your passion for s’mores adorable. She gives you a smile in thanks when you stick two marshmallows at the end of her stick. Pietro is excited to try s’mores after you and Nat having raved about them; he can’t help but wiggle the stick back and forth while you are trying to put some marshmallows on it. You and Nat are helping the twins make their first s’mores when Wanda asks, “Why don’t Lila and Cooper call you Aunt Y/N?”

“Because children recognize children,” Nat jests, but your cousin says her name as a warning anyway in case you two started up again. You call over Lila and Cooper for them to answer the question for you. Together they recite verbatim what you had told them to say when someone asked. “Aunt is for when you are old, boring, or married and Y/N is young, cool, and single.” You mouth along and give them a proud smile after.

“Exactly! Thank you, critters.” You give each a high five and they run back to their dad. Wanda looks impressed as do the rest. Nat, on the other hand, looks ready to argue again. “Excuse me, so which of the three am I, huh?”

“Well, you’re not married yet, so you take your pick between the other two choices.” Your eyes shimmer in merriment when she says nothing, opting to glare at you. Sam laughs and asks, “How long did it take them to remember that?”

“A whole summer two years ago. I told them I’d buy 4 pints of ice cream to whoever memorizes it first,” you explain. Everyone enjoys their s’mores, Pietro eating too many for his own good, as the sun disappears below the horizon. It’s not too long before Nat starts complaining about the bugs again. She’s cut off by her phone ringing. She stands off to the side to take the call. You joke around with Wanda saying it’s Bruce calling and you play out the conversation you think they’re having. Wanda laughs at your terrible attempt to mimic Nat and Bruce’s voices.

Nat comes back with news. “So, Rodgers can’t pick us up this weekend. He was called on a mission and had to take the jet, but Tony arranged for two agents named Bobby and Daisy to pick us up in 5 days.”

“You’re staying longer?” Lila asks and when Nat nods, she runs to hug Pietro cheering. You and Wanda look at each other after the news, both trying to see the other’s reaction. You give each other a shy smile. Wanda is happy to have more time with you. She was not ready to leave so soon not knowing when she would be able to see you next. You didn’t really know how you felt. You’re suddenly aware of your heart pounding aggressively against your chest. You were dreading your time with Wanda coming to a close but you were also somewhat prepared to hang on until the weekend without messing anything up. Hearing she’s staying for longer is a relief but you are not sure how long you can go without breaking and kissing her again, getting both your hopes up only for it to all come crashing down when she inevitably leaves.

Nat interrupts your internal turmoil by ways of complaining again about the bugs. “Okay, this is not gonna happen. Clint, let me see your keys.” Clint tosses her his car keys. She pulls the house key from the key ring and tosses the car keys back to Clint. “Cool, see you all at the house tomorrow. Whoever wants to sleep on an actual bed and not in this AC-less mosquito infested site, you are welcome to tag along.”

Laura stands up way too quickly for someone who is pregnant and says she’s going with Nat. Lila tags along, apparently not wanting to sleep here without her mom. “What a baby,” you say shaking your head as you watch Nat’s car’s lights disappear.

“Well at least now you’ll have more privacy in the tent,” Sam says, smirking at you and Wanda pointing out that you’ll be alone with Wanda in the tent, which you hadn’t put together until this moment. If your heart wasn’t beating like a drum before, it sure is trying to beat out of your chest now. You gulp at his insinuation. Maybe it isn’t too late to run after the car.

“Ew, I don’t want to hear anything,” Pietro says, Sam and surprisingly Clint agreeing by nodding their heads. Wanda rolls her eyes at him and Peter on the hand is blushing, trying not to look at you or Wanda like he’s already seen something. You’re suddenly aware that all of them are heading to their tents. The fire had been put out and all the leftover food had been put away sometime while you were watching Nat’s group drive away. Pietro and Peter share one tent and Sam, Clint, and Cooper another.

Wanda stands and looks down at you expectantly. You see she’s holding the lantern Lila always uses cause it’s in her favorite color of blue. “Do you plan to sleep outside?”

You roll your eyes and stand up to follow Wanda into your tent. There are three sleeping bags rolled out in front of you. “Guess we won’t be needing one of those,” Wanda comments behind you. The comment itself should make you nervous but what actually does it is the sound of her zipping the entrance closed. You gulp and can only let out a simple, “Mhm.”

If that alone had you acting this way, you didn’t want to find out what actually looking her way would do to you, so you quickly move, back hunching, to the back pack you brought. You kneel to comfortably search it. You gave her a better answer, clearing your throat. “Actually, Nat was right about the hard ground. You could use it as a double layer.”

“Or we could share it?” Wanda suggests. You stop digging in the bag as your breath catches. You reply, your voice an octave higher, “No, that-that’s okay.” You clear your throat when you notice your pitch and hope Wanda hadn’t. “I’m used to it, but I wouldn’t want to give you a bad impression of camping.” Wanda had. You are back to searching your bag for the sweats you had brought to sleep in.

Wanda notices you seem a little tense, having dug around that bag for awhile. She walks up to you and places a hand on your shoulder. Your body stiffens like a board under her hand. She has to ask, “Are you nervous?”

“Nervous? Pft, why would I be nervous?” You finally find your damn sweats. “I’ve done this a million times.” You are quick to change the subject when the only clothes apart from Nat’s you find beside your sweats are some pyjama shorts and a tank top. “Is this all you brought to sleep in?”

“I didn’t think we were going to be camping when I packed,” Wanda replies to your inquiry but she still has questions of her own she’d like answered. For example, why are you so nervous and what did the kiss yesterday mean for you two. “Y/N, we need to talk.”

“Luckily, Nat left her stuff so you can wear her clothes. Here.” You hand Wanda Nat’s sleepwear. She can obviously tell you were avoiding the conversation. “You can change. I’ll face the other way.” You turn around and change into your sweats. You would have to leave your top on not having planned for it to have gotten wet. You try not to let the sound of Wanda’s quick intake of breath make you blush knowing you didn’t give her any warning. You try really hard not to guess what Wanda is doing based on the sounds you’re hearing when you think she begins changing but your mind tends to wander especially when it comes to the girl behind you.

“I don’t see why you have to turn around. I’m sure you’ve seen plenty of women undress.” The sound of clothes falling to the ground makes you gulp. You are never so nervous and it’s killing you. You try your hardest to find something funny to say but come up empty. Wanda is still waiting on a response, so you say facing a tent wall, “None of those women are you.”

Your words spark something in each of your heads- a decision. You decide to take a chance with Wanda because you do believe it in your heart. Wanda is not like any of the other women including Skye. Even though she has to leave in five days, you can make it work. Wanda, however, is reminded of how she isn’t like other women. She is reminded of what Nat had said before. She decides maybe Vision was right.

As much as you wish you could avoid a serious talk, you know you owe it to her. They do say the secret to a good relationship is open communication. The term relationship usually makes you want to run for the hills but when you think of it tied to Wanda, a flutter tickles your stomach. It’s a feeling you never thought you would welcome again and you have to suppress a smile.

“Okay, you can turn around now,” Wanda says. She notices you hiding a smile and she’s wondering what brought it on. Wanda watches you move Nat’s sleeping bag under the one meant for her and then settle into your own. Your kind consideration makes her smile weakly, thinking of all the things she’ll miss such as you opening doors for her or letting her have your blanket and remain sitting still for the sake of her comfort. You stare up at Wanda who you see is lost in thought but staring in your direction and finally manage to act like yourself. “I’m sure the view is nice from there, but I can assure you I look good from all angles,” you joke and pat her sleeping bag beside you.

The sound of your hand patting her sleeping bag brings her out of her head and when she processes what you said, she rolls her eyes at you. She grabs the lantern, setting it a little aways from both of you once she gets into her sleeping bag. Both of you turn onto your sides placing your hands under your heads to face one another. You stare at each other for a while before a question pops up in your head. You ask, “What did Pietro mean by 3D printed?”

“Sorry?” Wanda looks confused so you clarify. “When you and your brother were arguing, he said your last relationship was 3D printed.” A light bulb goes off in her head, now knowing you were referring to Vision. “That was just Pietro being a jerk,” Wanda says and then she goes on to explain her relationship with this synthetic being to you. You try really hard not to let the fact that this ex-boyfriend of hers quite literally has a connection to her because how were you supposed to compare to that.

You shake that off and scrape every corner of your mind for any trace of confidence and gather that to work up the nerve to say, “Off topic, or maybe on topic, but I feel like we need to talk about yesterday on the ferris wheel.”

Wanda sees you struggle trying to start a serious conversation. Trying not to have you freak out, as Natasha had implied would practically be impossible, Wanda meets you in the middle. She tries a bit of humor, something you are more comfortable with. “You mean our friendly date?” She adds in a chuckle so you would know she is kidding with you.

You smile, appreciating her trying to make it easier on you to talk to her. If she’s trying for you, you can try for her, you think. You sober up and a more serious expression falls upon your face. You want Wanda to know you mean everything you are about to say next. Wanda, however, misreads the intent behind your expression. What she sees is you finding the words to let her down slowly again. You had said relationships weren’t for you and talk of past flings proved that, so she took a page out of your book- if you can’t beat them, join them. She can play nonchalant too.

“Yeah, about that. I’m sorry I acted so weird after, like it didn’t happen. The truth is I tried to ignore it, but I can’t because it’s constantly replaying in my head. All I can think about is doing it again and I know I said we could only be friends, but-”

“You were right.” Wanda cuts you off early. “What?” you ask thoroughly confused. She continues, “When you said we should just be friends, you were right. It was silly of me to even suggest anything. I mean I’m leaving in five days, so what is the point right?” Wanda reasons with you and as you are about to rebut to say you can make it work, she continues, “I mean I’m probably not in the right headspace to start anything serious. Vision just broke up with me like a month ago.”

You are starting to feel like you were gathering up courage for no reason, Wanda not letting you speak and stepping on every butterfly that had flapped its wings in your stomach with every word she says. “I came here to take my mind off of it and like magic, you appeared at the door- the perfect distraction.”

That is the blow to the gut you thought you could forget. You thought Clint was the one with perfect aim but Wanda impresses you with her accuracy, choosing the exact word that kills the last bit of hope left in you. On her side of things, Wanda thinks she is doing the right thing even though it kills her to push aside her feelings. Wanda thinks she is sparing you from having to turn her down again and sparing her feelings from having to hear you reject her once more.

“So don’t worry about the fair. I can definitely say I was not thinking about Vision on the ferris wheel. You are most welcome to do it again anytime.” Wanda forces out a laugh. You didn’t think the sound that would always make you smile would ever make you want to cry. No, you were not going to cry about a girl, especially in front of said girl no less.

You are angry with yourself. Angry for being so silly as to think this wouldn’t happen. You really played yourself here believing she would be nothing like Skye. It’s not Wanda’s fault. You know this. Still, you can’t help but place some blame on her, her and her stunning smile and her witty remarks and her gorgeous hair and her soft hands that would hold yours or playfully punch you when you joke around. You are angry and upset, and there are normal ways to deal with those emotions. You could yell, you could cry, you could mope and eat all the ice cream you wish, you could even, god forbid, go for a run, but all of those options are too rational for someone with impulsive tendencies.

Instead, you blink away the tears that were forming, from anger or sadness you don’t know, and move exceptionally closer to Wanda reaching out to run your fingers through her hair. Her breath catches as she watches your eyes take in every inch of her face with a look she can’t quite place. Her heartbeat paces quickly when she catches your eyes glancing down to her lips and then coming back up to peer into her eyes.

“Friends kiss friends all the time, right?”

You hardly give Wanda any time to nod before you crash your lips onto hers. This time you give her time to respond and the second you feel her kissing you back, you push her to lie on her back.

If a distraction is what she wants, you’ll show her just how distracting you can be.

______________________________________________________________________

One eternity later... je suis retournée! Thank you kind person who asked about me. I’ve been busy with school stuff but I’m done and graduating in two days so I finally have time to get back to this. So next update will probably be Sunday or Monday. Two more chapters left.

Next chapter: ;) (aka writer struggles to describe things having no experience of doing such things)

Taglist: @madamevirgo @marvels-writings @gayarchnemissis @myperfectlovepoem @purplemeetsblue @magicallymaximoff @b0mbdotc0m @helloalycia @ironscarletwidowsoilder @cantcontroltheirfear @trikruismybitch @your-my-mission @imagine-reblog @fayhar @idek-5 @causeitswhatjesuswouldfreakingdo @bemyvitamin

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff imagine #wanda maximoff x you

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lovinghaikyuu · 3 years

Note

Sweet! So do ya think ya can do a Sakuatsu poly where gender neutral or male reader is overworking? To the point of just plain exhaustion where they fall asleep literally standing? Thank you!! <3

-🏵

Sakuatsu x gn!reader

Warnings: brief mentions of not eating enough

It’s Friday, a day that usually brings you comfort and relief with the nearing weekend, but today all you feel is on edge. Has the week gone by that fast? Every day feels the same. With work, exams, and your personal life, it seems like you haven’t had even a moment to spare. Your sleep schedule is nowhere to be found, and you can forget about proper meals. Who has time for that when there’s so much to be done?

How long this has been going on you have no idea, it’s been a normal thing for a while. Go to classes with barely three hours of sleep? It’s become easy for you. Work yourself to exhaustion with no breaks? You’re used to it by now. You thought it wasn’t a big deal, or that no one would notice, but you’ve been proven wrong on multiple occasions.

You and your boyfriends are exceptionally close, nothing goes unnoticed between you three.

“Have you eaten anything today?” Sakusa always asks you.

“You should really take a break,” Atsumu tells you every day without fail.

Their little reminders bring you out of your unhealthy routine and remind you to take care of yourself; you’d be a mess without them. You’re especially thankful for them on days like this. The days that are particularly tiring, but you continue your habits as always.

You had just got home and went straight to your room, not wanting to waste a moment and getting right to work. Have my professors always assigned this much? you think. After all, four essays and multiple exams to study for does seem a bit excessive. But you don’t complain, and instead focus on getting the work done.

However, after a short while your concentration is disrupted by a knock at your door. You reluctantly get up from your desk to answer it, not wanting to stop working just yet. But when you open the door and are met with your two favorite people, you’re glad you did.

“Y/n!” Atsumu’s booming voice greets you, Sakusa doing the same with a warm smile.

“We’re going to the park downtown, wanna come with us? It’ll be fun,” Atsumu asks.

“To play volleyball?”

“Yeah maybe, whatever ya want to do, really,” He says with a smile, Sakusa nods in agreement.

“I don’t know, I have stuff to do-”

“No, you’re coming with,” Sakusa interrupts you. “You need to get out of the house, get some exercise.”

“Not to mention some fresh air.”

You look at them and can’t help but smile, they know what you’re going through. You three are very good at understanding each other, to the point where sometimes you don’t have to say anything at all.

“Yeah, okay.” You figure you can take the rest of the day off for them, and you gladly do.

And so, you make your way over to the park, holding hands and chatting about your days. You really love times like these.

“Hey look,” Atsumu points to a nearing food stand, “Wanna go get somethin’ from there?”You all agree and hurry over, eager to fill your hungry stomachs. But when you get there, there’s a relatively long line.

“Should we just come back later?” Sakusa questions.

“Nah don’t worry, the line will move fast,” Atsumu reassures him, “Plus I’m starving, I think I’ll die if I wait to eat any longer.”

You and Sakusa look at each other, rolling your eyes before laughing at Atsumu’s dramatic behavior. The time spent waiting in line seems like forever, and your lack of sleep starts to catch up to you. This is the first time in days since you’ve had an actual break, and you begin to drift off, leaning on Sakusa’a shoulder as a pillow.

“Hey, you okay?” He nudges you, momentarily pulling you out of your sleepy daze.

“Yeah, just a little tired.” He nods and wraps his arm around you, making sure you won’t fall if you begin to drift asleep again. And you do, this time not waking up until Atsumu returns with your food.

“Y/n, are ya good?” He asks, gently shaking you awake. “You fell asleep, how much sleep did you get last night?” You look up at him, truly not knowing the answer to his question. “We should go back,” he says, “you need to rest.” Sakusa hastily agrees, and you three begin the walk back to your place.

When you finally arrive home, they immediately take you to your room.

“Are ya comfy?” Atsumu questions while tucking you in.

“Yeah, thank you,” you mumble, letting the the warmth of the blankets overtake you.

“Do you need anything? Water? Medicine?” Sakusa asks.

“No, I’m fine,” you say, giving him a smile. He leaves the room anyway, and heads to the kitchen to get you a cold glass of water.

“Why didn’t you tell us it was this bad?” Atsumu asks you, concern present in his voice. “If we had known you were this stressed, we would’ve helped you.”

“I’m sorry, I just didn’t want you guys to worry. It’s fine, really”

“No it’s not,” he pauses, seemingly deep in thought. “Next time, do ya promise you’ll tell us? We want to make sure you’re okay.”

“I Promise.”

Sakusa returns with your water, making sure you drink some before kissing your forehead. After making sure you’re alright, they make their way out of your room to let you sleep.

“I love you guys, thank you,” You tell them as they leave.

“Love you,” They say in unison, turning the lights off and wishing you a goodnight.

I hope this lived up to your expectations! This was my first time writing for both Sakusa and a polyamorous relationship, so I really hope I did them both justice <3

#haikyuu x gn!reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu comfort #haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu imagines #sakusa x reader #atsumu x reader #sakuatsu x reader #you’ve got mail

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arizona2004 · 3 years

Note

Hey can you please do a azriel x reader where the reader is struggling with bad mental health (maybe an Ed) because I’m struggling myself rn and alsao there’s not enough of them :). I can totally understand if you didn’t feel comfortable doing it

Okay, here it is. Everyone responds to their eating disorders differently, especially depending on the ED and severity of it. I hope this has what you’re looking for, though.

Azriel x reader

Word count: 1499

Warnings: Eating Disorders! The reader struggles with an ED and some depression and anxiety and a little OCD. Please don’t read if you think reading the unhealthy thoughts of someone with an eating disorder may cause you to relapse. It is not healthy to think about food and eating in this manner. Love you all. Don’t forget to eat something and drink some water.

Waking up, I immediately don’t want to get out of bed. I pull the covers over my head, keep my eyes closed, and scrunch my legs up to my chest. When I wake up again, it’s only a little later in the morning. I still don’t want to pull myself out of bed, but I can’t fall back asleep. So I just lay there. Turning to Azriel’s side of the bed, I notice he’s not there. Well, of course not; he’s already left for work. I stare at the spot he usually occupies before finally sitting up and checking the clock. It’s 10 am.

Standing, I wrap my robe around myself and walk out of the room, refusing to look in the mirror. I practice breathing evenly and focus on my routine. I need to eat breakfast. I spend nearly 20 minutes in the kitchen, moving around, deciding what to eat. I’m opening cabinets and closing them, finding nothing satisfactory. Eventually, I decide to make some bacon. The stove is on, and bacon is sizzling. The scent of bacon is wafting toward me, and I feel like being sick. I can’t eat bacon; it’s greasy and fatty. Toast, I think, I’ll make toast. So I put the bread in the toaster and let it cook. It’s only when the toast is cooked that I start thinking about the carbs that go into it. I haven’t been exercising enough recently. I shouldn’t eat so many carbs. I throw the toast out with the bacon and decide to make scrambled eggs instead. Whisking the eggs and milk together, I turn on the stove, letting the skillet heat and butter melt on it. When I turn, bowl in hand, ready to pour it into the skillet, it slips from my hand, spilling all over the floor. Anger and frustration wash over me; I guess I just shouldn’t eat this morning.

After cleaning the mess: doing the dishes that littered the sink and picking up the mess of eggs on the floor, I walk back up to my room. My head is pounding, and everything feels like it's crashing in on me. My heart is racing, and I just want to scream. My mind keeps flashing back to last night. We went out to Ritas, and it was supposed to be fun. But I just had to ruin things for myself. I barely ate. I stopped drinking early into the night. I wish I could have forgone the entire night. I wish Mor wasn’t so perfect. She has curves in all the right places and not a single flaw; I hate her for it, I think. Passing the floor-length mirror in my bedroom, I stop to look at myself. It’s been so long since I’ve looked in the mirror and liked what I saw. Why can't I have a body like Mor or Feyre or Amren?

I sit on the floor, just picking apart all the pieces of myself I hate. Thinking about all the insulting things people have said to me. Tears are streaming out of my eyes until I can’t even see my reflection. I’m clutching my chest as I struggle for air through my sobs. Why? Why? Why?

It’s an hour later, and I’m just lying on the floor of my bedroom, staring at the ceiling. I pushed my earlier hunger away, so I can’t feel it anymore. I wish I couldn’t feel any of it. The tears on my face have dried, and I’m breathing normally again when a small piece of folded paper falls next to me.

The Note reads: Meet me at my office at 11:30?

Azriel. I turn my head to look at the clock hanging on the wall. It’s nearly 11:20: a choked sob leaves my throat. Standing quickly, I rush to the bathroom to put myself together. In 10 minutes, my face is washed, and I’m wearing enough makeup to cover any signs of my tears. And I brushed through my hair and threw on some clothes. Rushing out the door, I head for the House of Wind. In the time it took to get to the door of his office, I’ve done breathing exercises to even out my breaths and slipped on a smile.

Knocking on the door to his office, I peeked my head in. “Hey,” I say, biting my lip.

He looked up to me, a grin spreading across his face and arms opening for me. I walked in, shutting the door behind me, and sat on his lap. He wrapped his arms around me, resting his head on my shoulder. He breathed in deeply, taking in the scent of me. “You smell wonderful, love,” he murmurs against my neck.

“Hmm,” I hum, holding him tight.

“Are you feeling alright?” He asks, pulling back slightly to look at me directly.

“Yeah,” An unconscious fake smile blooms across my face, “why wouldn’t I be?”

He just stares at me for a moment longer, eyebrows bunching, when he asks, “have you eaten today?”

“Yes. Breakfast this morning,” I say, “when I woke to an empty bed,” I try steering the question away from myself.

He knows I’m lying, “are you hungry? We could get lunch.”

“It was a big breakfast, Az,” I say, “I’m not hungry right now.”

He grips my waist and pulls me closer, wrapping his wings around us, “What’d you eat?”

“I made toast, scrambled eggs, and bacon,” It’s not entirely a lie, I think to myself.

He puts his forehead on my shoulder, resting it there for a long few moments, “baby,” he mumbles, “please don’t lie to me. We’ve been through this before: I can help, just talk to me.”

My lips start to quiver, I’ve upset him.

“I’m with you through all the good And the bad,” he says, head still down, “please tell me the truth about how you’re feeling,” he lifts his head to look at me, and the worrying features of his face make me sob again. “Hey, hey. It’s okay,” he consoles, wiping the tears from my face, “deep breaths.”

I take a deep breath in and out, and he does it with me. My tears start to slow, and the shuddering breaths even out. Az is running his hand up and down my spine, soothingly and when I’m ready, I explain everything, “I guess- things started getting bad yesterday. I didn’t really like the way I looked in that dress, and I just felt… off? Gross? I don’t know,” I take another breath in, “then Mor showed up, and she just looked so good in that dress; she’s so beautiful. And she ate and drank so much,” I’m ranting now, “Does she ever gain weight?!” I stop talking, trying to calm myself, and tears well up again, but I push them back. Looking back to Az, I start talking again, “I shouldn’t be jealous. I’m a horrible friend for being mad at her, but I just can’t stand her sometimes. I’m a horrible friend.”

I’m looking down between us now, but Az coaxes me back, “look at me,” he holds my face between his hands and pushes our foreheads together, “You are not a horrible friend. You are wonderful and kind. It’s okay to be jealous. You still love her, and you’re still a good friend. Now, tell me the rest.”

I shake my head holding back my tears, “It’s just the same thing. I just- it’s everything combined. I feel like I ate too much yesterday, and I haven’t worked out regularly this week. Then everything last night. So when I woke up this morning, everything was too much. Seeing myself in the mirror and thinking about how much I don’t deserve you. I’m not pretty enough. It’s all just so much. All at once,” my breaths come unevenly again, and tears are running down my face.

He doesn’t say anything for a long moment; his hands drop from my face and pull me into him. His hands run through my hair, and he just soothes me quietly for a few minutes. When he pulls back to look at me, he says quietly and calmly, “You’re beautiful, love. And I know me telling you that isn’t just gonna take all the bad thoughts and feelings away, but I need you to know: No matter what you see in the mirror or what your mind tells you, you are so beautiful. You have your ‘flaws,’ but that’s okay. You just have to learn to love them the way I do. And I’ll help you with that; I’m here to help.”

I nod, tears still streaming down my face, and lay my head on his shoulder, breathing him in and calming myself.

“Can we go eat food now,” he asks quietly. I nod letting myself feel the hunger I pushed aside and relaxed further into his arms. He lifts me with him as he stands and walks us to the kitchen.

#azriel fic #azriel x y/n #azriel x you #azriel x reader #acotar fic #a court of thorns and roses #mental heath awareness #azzie

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youngbeezer · 3 years

Note

Holding my hand while he’s in the front seat and I’m in the back with Bowen Byram (if you can!)

hiii kelly thanks for sending me a request<33 sorry this took so long!

Referenced Post

Prompt-- 10. Holding my hand while hes in the front and I'm in the back (w Bowen Byram)

A/N: Here's another blurb from the 14 oddly romantic things blurb set. Thanks for requesting this, hope you like it :)

Word Count: 1249

Warning(s): mention of nausea, car sickness, a few curse words; Tyson Jost & Cale Makar are both mentioned (just in case you do not like them :/)

join my taglist :)

‘u okay?’

I am only able to get a quick peek at my phone to read the text message that comes from my boyfriend, who is sitting right in front of me in the passenger seat, before I feel another wave of nausea hit me. I continue doing my breathing exercises to try and calm my body down, and so I don’t make a scene in front of the other two people in the car with us.

Right now we are currently on our way to the lakehouse my brother, Tyson, rented out for the week. In the car we have Tyson driving (recklessly may I add), Bowen sitting next to him, and another one of their teammates, Cale, sitting beside me in the backseat. There are two other cars following behind us filled with some more of Tyson’s teammates and their significant others. They all figured they should have one last hoorah together before they all part ways to their respective homes for the offseason.

Now everyone on the team just expects I’m coming because Tyson is my brother and I wanted to spend more time with him. But, the actual reason is I just wanted to be able to spend some time (albeit most of it will be with others around) with my boyfriend Bowen, which no one knows is actually my boyfriend. We have both decided to keep it on the down low for a while to figure out if this is something that can potentially grow serious, before we tell my crazy overprotective brother, who will most likely throw a huge hissy fit.

I’m abruptly pulled out of my thoughts when Tys makes another sharp turn. I let out a low groan when I lurched forward as far as my seatbelt could take me, and bile started to climb up my throat. Cale notices my uncomfortable expression and gives me a worried look.

“Hey, are you alright y/n?” He cautioned, not sure what was going on.

Tyson’s eyes meet mine in the rearview mirror with a matching worried expression. Once he sees my distraught look, he looks back at me for a quick second before averting his eyes back to the road.

“y/n/n what’s up? You’re looking a little green.” Tyson commented.

“Can you pull over?” I croak out.

Tyson lets out a dramatic sigh. “C’mon we’re almost at the cabin.” He drawls out. “You’ll be fine. Just take some deep breaths.”

“Well then can you stop driving like a fucking maniac. You know I get car sick.” I snap. I see Tyson huff a little through the rearview mirror, but thankfully I do feel the car slow down a bit.

Bowen turns around in his seat to face me with a pained expression once he sees how much discomfort I am in. He tries to give me a little smile, but all he gets in return is a little shudder from me as I rest my head against the cool window.

“Here, you wanna try drinking some of my water?” He offers.

I take the bottle out of his outstretched hand and mumble out a quick, “thanks.”

As Bowen turns back in his seat, I just barely notice the slight eye roll that comes from my brother. I try not to focus too hard on what that could mean and instead focus on taking some deep breaths. Another low groan escapes my lips during a sharp turn, and that’s when I notice the hand peeking through the passenger seat and the door. I immediately go to take Bowen’s hand and instantly find comfort in his touch. His thumb rubs soothing circles onto the back of my hand that actually does wonders to calm me down.

For the rest of the car ride, Bowen and I keep our hands interlocked with each other-- him continuing to rub those soothing circles and every once in a while giving my hand a little squeeze when Tyson pushes down on the gas a little too hard, or we take an unnecessary sharp turn. And if Cale notices are conjoined hands, he doesn’t say a word.

Eventually, we made it to the cabin, surprisingly all in one piece.

“Remind me to drive back with Mikko and the others please.” I semi-jokingly say to Cale. He lets out a little chuckle, whereas Tyson just gives me a little glare from his seat.

Bowen and I finally part our hands once Tys takes the keys out of the ignition. Everyone then starts making their way out of the car, myself taking it a little bit slower so I don’t end up throwing up everywhere once my feet hit the ground.

As we are getting all the luggage out of the the trunk of the car, Tyson turns to both Bowen and I and surprises us with his next words,

“Byram, help y/n take her stuff up to your guys’ room?” Both of us raise our eyebrows and try to act confused at his words.

“Sorry?” Bowen squeaks out.

“You guys are sharing a room since you’re dating,” Tyson states matter-of-factly. “You are together, correct?” He says it so smugly, knowing that he has caught us in a lie. Obviously we weren’t as inconspicuous in our sneaking around as we thought we were. Bowen just clears his throat awkwardly before taking my bags and moving to stand next to me. I see him give me a pleading look, urging me to be the one to say something.

“How’d you know?” I questioned.

Tyson lets out a little scoff before replying, “You guys aren’t as slick as you think you are.” Out of the corner of my eye I see Cale nod his head in agreement. I meet Bowen’s eyes and let out a breathy chuckle while shaking my head.

“So you aren’t mad?” I pondered to my brother.

He let out the littlest sigh and approaches me to put his arm around my shoulder.

“Nahh. First off, you’re kinda grown up now so I can’t really tell you what to do anymore. And second,” he pauses and looks over at my boyfriend, “Byram’s a good guy, so I trust him.” They both smile at each other and do that little bro hand shake thing. Tys still has a grip on Bo's hand though when he warns, “But, if I hear a single noise come out of that room, I will beat your ass.”

Bowen clears his throat before pulling his hand away from Tyson’s and moving it to scratch the base of his neck awkwardly. “Noted.” He stutters out.

Both Tyson and Cale then leave us alone to make their way into the cabin. Bowen closes the gap between us two to bring me into a hug.

“Feeling better?” He mumbles into my hair, leaving a few kisses as he does.

I lift my head off his chest to meet his eyes and give him one of the biggest grins ever. “So much better now.” I smiled.

He gives me a quick peck on the lips, since Tyson was still in range of view. With a tiny smirk forming on his face he grinned, “Let’s go to our room then, eh?”

I grab ahold of his hand and let him lead me into the house, smiling at the fact we don’t have to sneak around anymore and I get to openly enjoy our time together with the love of my life.

This week just got a whole lot better.

Taglist: @joelsfarabees @heatherawoowoo @barzy-xoxo @barzysandmarnersbitch @hockeyplayerstories

Tagging some mutuals as well,,, @tessisawriter @luukasreichel @lovereadinghockeyy @carepriceisgoodathockey @2manytabsopen @frederikanderson @bb-nhlqueen7 @gigissports @jamiesdrysdales @heybarzy @cherrylita @cherrybarzy @prettyboyjackhughes @kentjohnsons

#bowen byram #colorado avalanche #bowen byram imagine #bowen byram x reader #bowen byram blurb #nhl #nhl imagine #nhl blurb #nhl fic #hockey #hockey imagine #hockey blurb #hockey fic #my writing #hope you liked it :)#14 oddly romantic things blurb set #tyson jost #cale makar #mikko rantanen

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persimmonteas · 3 years

Text

take a good look

4 times you gaze at him + 1 time he gazes at you

fic cowritten with @shinaus, art by @annypuff <3. you can buy mel a coffee and anny a coffee. please support them! their work is banging and i love them 🥺

pairing: vampire!shinso x f!reader

word count: ~4.5k

genre: slice of life fantasy (a tinge of coffee shop!AU), fluff, mutual pining, smut

cw: dom!shinso, size kink, daddy kink (inspired by toshi anon), praise kink, some degradation (he says slut 3x), fingerfucking, nipple play, choking, hair pulling, mirror sex, mating press, hickies everywhere, a cunt slap, overstimulation

first time: the coffee shop incident

Of course your favorite coffee shop is swamped. This place is the only good thing about waking up close to dawn, with drinks always better than what your office has to offer and not to mention the pastries they make fresh.

Letting out a small groan, you decide to wait it out in the line and do your best to hurry with your breakfast before heading into work. Thankfully, you always leave yourself with enough time to actually sit and enjoy whatever you decide to buy that day, opting for it over greasy break rooms or stuffy smoking areas.

Once the warm mug is in hand, you make quick work to try and find your usual spot only to find it occupied. While you won’t act possessive over a public seat of all things, losing the chance to enjoy glancing out the window and munching down your croissant seems to screw with your brain.

You act without thinking, making a sharp turn to go sit somewhere else only for your knee to make contact with the underside of another table. Shit, you think to yourself, hearing the clatter of their cup. You helplessly watch liquid run down the table and into the person’s lap.

You expect them to flinch, dart up from the table or, hell, even yell at you for your carelessness. He doesn’t yell at you and you don’t expect to see the colour of the liquid running down the table onto the floor to be red. Blood red. Fuck. A vampire. Hopefully, one who doesn’t eat you for your stupidity.

Just as you feel your heart sinking down to your stomach, your eyes flick up to meet the man whose day you likely ruined. You don’t see a hint of anger on his attractive features. In his defence, it’s probably because he’s busy looking at the way you’re gawking at him.

His unkempt hair and the deep eye bags adorning his sculpted face somehow make him look all the more endearing. It even looks like he’s wearing the smallest hint of eyeliner. Or are his eyes just naturally like that? Hard to tell.

You’re pulled out of your thoughts (and staring session) by him breaking eye contact with you to clean himself up, before rising to his feet and doing the same to the table. It makes you come back down to Earth, and thereby remembering your clownery

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to—” you start, but are met with a hand held up in front of your face. You furrow your brows in confusion, having assumed his lack of aggression would mean he’d be more understanding but nope.

“No issue,” he grumbles in response, giving his trousers one last wipe down before swiftly weaving through the others in the coffee shop, flipping his hoodie up and taking his leave. Now, you’re even more confused.

Sure, you spilled something over him and the table, but you would have bought him another one? Paid for his dry cleaning or something maybe? Yet, off he went, moving so quickly you couldn’t ever hope to catch up to him. Fucking vampires, man, you shake your head.

The confusion eventually fades but not completely. You help one of the baristas doing the last of the clean up before settling into the strange vampire’s seat and letting your mind wander as you eat your breakfast.

second time: gawking at the gym

It’s a common occurrence for you to make it to the gym right as the rush of 9-5s ends, the perfect time in your opinion. Nobody hogging any of the ellipticals, the water cooler always left unoccupied and nothing but time for you to get through your usual routine.

With this in mind, you can confidently say that nothing out of the ordinary ever happens at the gym. Well, could say.

Carefully bringing your leg around to meet the other on your way off of the exercise bike, you're momentarily distracted by the sound of a nearby treadmill whirring so much hard that it sounds as though it may break.

Lifting your towel and water bottle, you make your way over in curiosity. It almost seems as if whoever is on the treadmill moves even faster as you approach. Once you make it there, you’re met with the man who seems to be continuously haunting your surroundings.

Despite his unruly purple hair in a band and all-black gym attire, vamp man still seems out of place. The athletic wear is a complete change of pace, considering the hoodie and leather jacket he was wearing during your first encounter.

You rid yourself of any wandering thoughts about the man and focus on him being the reason that the treadmill is about to be on its last legs. You can’t bring yourself to look away from him; the sheer speed of his legs is mindblowing. And a little ridiculous looking if you’re honest with yourself.

The moment is short lived when he slows to a stop, probably thinking the same thing that you are about the poor machine not being able to last another mile. He looks like he’s barely broken a sweat. Fucking vampires, you repeat to yourself.

Just your luck, he notices your presence as he dabs the side of his not-even-sweating face with his towel. He begins to smirk at your eyes on him.

“Little rude to stare, isn’t it?” he wonders aloud, voice much deeper and more luxurious than what you remember. Getting caught fills you with deep embarrassment. You stutter out a quick apology before making your way over to another machine.

Even with your back facing away from any passing people as you continue your routine, you can practically feel his eyes boring into you.

A few minutes is all it takes for you to turn to check if your suspicions are correct. You’re met with his shameless stare. He’s not even making an attempt to hide his gaze either, leaning on one of the back walls as he watches you, large arms crossed over his broad chest somehow making the skin-tight shirt he’s wearing even tighter.

This is torture, you think to yourself as you give him a polite smile, only to hear him chuckling at your strained smile.

“What? So you can stare but I can’t?” he tries, fully getting your attention once more as you stop what you’re doing. Sighing and smacking your machine, you come off of your machine and make your way back over to him.

Your confidence about approaching decreases as you see the full height difference between you two. You’re a fair bit smaller than he is. He looms over you even with his back still leaning against the wall.

“If you’re trying to stalk me, you’re doing a bad job. It should be me, after all. I’m the predator,” he lightly mocks you.

You almost stomp your foot. “I am not stalking you!” you protest. “It isn’t my fault that you apparently go to the same coffee shop and gym as me.”

He levels you with a delighted look. Humans usually don’t take his teasing well but you seem so much fun.

Throwing an annoyed peace sign at him, you make your way out of the gym.

third time: literally just that scene in the first twilight movie without edward doing donuts in his car into the lot

“What’s a pretty thing like you doing out at this time?” The low voice comes from your side, making every muscle in your body suddenly jolt. You just left your friends. Why do creeps seem to have a radar?

Even as you pick up your pace and ignore the question, it only seems to egg him on more. Right as he starts talking to you again, he’s swiftly cut off.

Feeling a small gust of wind at your back despite the calm night, you turn in confusion. Where did the creep go? Your question is answered when you watch him get slammed against the nearest storefront’s shutters. A much taller figure overshadows over him, hand around the creep’s throat.

Even in the darkness, you can see the purple hair, unruly as ever starting from the collar of his coat. You stride over and pull on Shinso’s coat sleeve in hopes of ceasing his threatening actions—no matter how much the creep deserves the vampire’s ire. After all, you don’t want Shinso to end up with a track record after, like, a century (you’re guessing) without one.

“Shinso,” you say, eyes pleading as you look up at him—unaware of how much he enjoys hearing you so naturally say his name. He meets your stare briefly then rolls his eyes and releases his hold, watching the man scramble away. The chuckle that leaves him at the scene makes you wonder if he’s a sadist.

Before you can wonder much more, he grips your hand tightly in his own as he leads you farther down the street. The clasp strangely comforting to you despite his freezing skin.

“You really need to stop being so irresponsible,” he tells you, tone almost mocking as he (somehow) takes every right path to your apartment building. There’s no point in questioning how he knows this. After all, for some reason, the world keeps leading you to him in an array of coincidences that are starting to feel less and less coincidental.

When you let out a scoff, his hand seems to tighten further and you reflexively try to yank your hand away. He just stops in his tracks and turns to face you. There’s a look in his eyes you don’t question, especially since he speaks up before you do.

“Don’t make me have to watch your every move to keep you out of trouble, I’d like to have a social life too, you know,” he grumbles, before turning to walk away. It leaves you a little dumbfounded to say the least, since you’re not exactly stopping him from having a life. Y’know, with, how totally unplanned these encounters are and all.

fourth time: the confrontation

Apparently, not one thing can be your own anymore. Not that you’re complaining, of course, but the sheer number of coincidences between you and Shinso is extraordinary and only seems to escalate. You keep running into him even in places so busy that you think there’s no chance of running into anybody you know.

Now that Autumn is in full swing, the nights are colder and the leaves are dappled in brown and red shades. The perfect time to start going on walks through some of the bustling parks you live near.

You love the scenery, especially the large lake that lies in the middle of your favorite park. As dusk rolls around, you take the chance to get a walk in to enjoy the now barely visible sunlight and to ponder a certain vampire.

Not even one lap into walking around the lake, you catch sight of the colour that’s been plaguing your thoughts in your peripheral.

The deep indigo colour is hard to miss, especially when it’s on the head of the vampire you keep running into. Though this time feels a little different since you finally catch him when he’s unaware of you.

Sitting on one of the benches facing the water, he’s wearing his typical hoodie and leather jacket and is holding what looks to be a book. What kind of book a vampire reads is beyond your imagination.

All you know is that you finally have the opportunity to take the upper hand. Every time you see Shinso, he worms his way out of your questions. Or he leaves in an ominous distinctly vampire fashion.

There’s no reason for him to be everywhere you go, unless ... You want to confirm your hypothesis.

The plan is simple. You’ll act like you're still out on your casual walk and you’ll walk up to the bench and sit down in a non-suspicious way. You nod to yourself. Perfect, flawless plan.

It shockingly works … his book must be really good. You get all the way up to the bench without him acknowledging you. Since he’s only taking up one side, you don’t wait for verbal permission to sit down alongside him.

He still makes no indication that he notices you. His eyes never leave the book he has in his hands. You fixate your eyes on the silver ring on his index finger as he flicks through the pages.

You lean in close and try to keep your smugness about finally startling him from bleeding into your voice when you speak.

“You know, I’m starting to think you’re conveniently everywhere I go on purpose.”

For the first time ever, he’s the one caught off guard. Shinso flinches away from you and brings his eyes to meet yours. Without his signature smirk or witty comments, he simply gets up to take his leave.

Well. This certainly isn’t going the way you want.

After your many encounters, you can pick up on his overall mood through his reactions to you. Though, he’s never reacted like this. At least not since the incident at the coffee shop.

The dismissal ignites irritation in you. Why is up to him whether or not you interacted? Taking the opportunity while you still have it, you follow him.

It isn’t until he passes a large tree just off of the main path that you completely catch up to him. You realize he’ll easily slip away if you don’t move quickly. So you do, hand coming up to hit the tree trunk and essentially blocking his way.

His eyes widen at you. However, he makes no attempt at escaping.

“Why do we keep running into each other?” you ask with exasperation, eyes still on him as he moves to lean against the tree. You don’t move your hand, using it to grasp some control of the situation.

“You’re everywhere I go, it doesn’t matter where or when. You’re always there.” The rant is far from needed for him, he knows this already. But, you keep going.

“What is this? Were we lovers in a past life or something? Do you have some unresolved feelings?” The way you’re rambling makes you impossibly endearing to him. His classic chuckle slipping out stops you in your tracks.

“Nothing of the sort,” he curtly replies. You cross your arms over your chest at his usual demeanor returning. “No such thing as reincarnated soulmates, at least with what I’ve experienced in my lifetime. Though, the feelings department…” As he continues, he leans closer to you. So much so you can almost feel his breath on your face and smell his warm, spicy cologne.

“Is there a problem if I do have feelings for you?”

You blink at him. What? You don’t think you’ve ever been so caught off guard.. Feelings? Is that what this has all been about?

Every previous encounter begins to run through your head and you start picking out small things that back up his statement. The lingering stares, teasing words, protective nature. You groan and drag your hands down your face. Man, you didn’t pick up on any of his hints. He must think you’re an idiot.

Before you can give him an answer, he pushes off the tree, standing over you at full height. Assuming he’s about to attempt to leave once more, you’re surprised to see him turning back in the direction of the bench. When you make no effort to move, he reaches out and pulls you by your coat until his hand is in yours.

“I’ll take that as not a problem.” A smirk still on his face due to you indirectly feeding his ego.

Although, now walking beside him, you don’t miss the way his free hand reaches up to rub at the back of his neck. A gesture you recognise as one of his nervous tics. Did you do that to him? You grin at the idea that you make the great vampire feel that way.

“There’s a scooter rental place down by this side of the lake.” His voice brings you out of your thoughts, realising he’s been trying to hold eye contact with you. “I’ll make a deal with you, if you let me take you out on a ride around the lake, I’ll answer any questions you have, deal?”

The way he’s practically bargaining with you makes you want to laugh, but you keep your face neutral as you agree to his offer. Who turns down taking a romantic scooter ride with a hot vampire? Nobody.

Of course, he takes any opportunity to tease you, so he rents a smaller scooter so you have to cling onto him.

You don’t complain though. How can you as you enjoy feeling his back muscles flex? Not to mention, he keeps his promise and answers any and every question you have about himself or his past. And, wow, he has an interesting and long past.

As the sky turns dark and drips stars, you’re left with a feeling rising in your chest that you certainly don’t reject and with the hope of meeting him again—on purpose, this time. A planned event seems likely as you clutch the torn-out blank page of his book with his phone number scribbled across it in your fist.

one time: he gazes at you

“Hitoshi. You already have better night vision than me. This is so extra!” you protest, stumbling through the dark apartment as your vampiric boyfriend maneuvers you to ... his room, you think.

Hitoshi just rubs soothing circles on your back and you just know the fucker is smirking. You hear the light click on.

“You can take the blindfold off.”

Tugging the blindfold off, you stare at the new object Hitoshi bought for his room.

“Baby, this is a mirror.”

He nods while leaning against his bed, looking infuriatingly pretty per usual.

“You can’t even see yourself in a mirror. Why?” You arch an eyebrow in Hitoshi’s direction, trying to explain your absolute bafflement at his purchase.

“In case you’re here and want to check yourself out.”

You see nothing but innocence plastered on his facial expression but did you trust it? No.

A mindblowing second later, he stands in front of you, caressing your face with calloused, cold hands. A nice contrast to the sweltering temperature in his room he set for you. Hitoshi leans in to kiss you, gentle but firm. Your hands go up to fist his shirt as he intensifies the kiss.

He slides his hands down your cheek to stroke your lip and then slowly skims down your body.

“It would be a great idea to take this off,” he whispers, playing with the hem of your shirt.

You eagerly nod as he strips you out of your shirt and pants. Awareness of his plans finally clicks when he turns you to face the mirror.

The remark on the tip of your tongue dies when Hitoshi rolls your nipples through the thin lace of your bra. You arch into his touch as he gently pinches and pulls them. God, your panties are already drenched and nipples hard.

“Fuck,” you moan as Hitoshi slides your panties to the side. Letting you lean against his corded chest, he hitches one of your legs off the floor.

“Go on, spread yourself open. Let me see how wet your slutty cunt is,” he murmurs into your ear.

You hard swallow as you spread your glistening lips open for him, strands of your arousal clinging to your fingers when you pull them away. Hitoshi digs his hand into your thigh.

“Did I tell you to stop?” He sounds amused as he uses his other hand to pull your hair by the roots.

“No, no, daddy, I’m sorry,” you apologize and move your hand back to where it belongs.

“Good girl, look at yourself. Wrecked without even being fucked.” You stare at yourself in the mirror with a half-lidded gaze. He’s right. With your heaving chest and puffy, soaked pussy, you look like you’ve been railed. But instead, you continue to spread open your aching pussy for your fully clothed boyfriend.

“Daddy, daddy, please touch me,” you plead as you grind against his hard bulge, desperate for any kind of friction.

“Are you going to be a good girl for me?” If you were any more lucid, you’d have smacked Hitoshi for his lilting tease.

“Aren’t I always a good girl,” you whine, hands clambering at his thighs.

He chuckles at that, kissing your head before somehow gracefully crumpling to the ground with you in his lap. In a blink, he has you spread out in his lap as he plays with your clit. He slides a thick finger inside your tiny cunny as he grazes your shoulder with his canines.

“Look at you,” he coos. “You look so good like this, my darling little slut.”

You don’t even have a retort, too enraptured by the sight of Hitoshi fingerfucking your sopping cunt with his invisible hand. The way your cunt opens for him and gapes in the mirror spellbinding for both of you.

You moan as your hips jerk up. There’s not much more he loves than how your lips part and your legs shake at how he strokes his finger inside of you.

“More,” you beg. How can he resist your dazed expression?

“Such a needy baby,” he tsks as he scissors you open with another finger.

Another strum of your clit and pinch of your nipple and you’re gone, eyes squeezing shut. Your juices surely ruining his pants as you writhe in his lap.

He cradles your cheek and then grips your chin to turn you back to the mirror.

“Look at yourself, pretty girl. Such a fucked out mess.”

You gaze at the bruises blooming over your shoulders and down your neck and shudder, pleased. The aftershocks of your orgasm leave you warm as you languidly suck your juices off Hitoshi’s fingers.

“Toshi!” you squeal as he gently deposits you on his bed and pulls his clothes off. The bed is purely decorative and for you considering he doesn’t sleep. Although, even with a bed, you guys still fuck over every surface in his apartment.

Your sensitivity protests fall to deaf ears as he bends your knees to your chest. This time, Hitoshi is the one to spread you open. He slaps your cunt and you claw at the sheets. Pumping two fingers slowly in and out of you, he uses his other hand to roughly pull down your bra.

His chapped lips wrapping around your nipple and cold fingers groping your other breast feel overwhelming. Hitoshi cages you in, sucking wet kisses over your tits, leaving you no room to evade his overstimulation as you squirm to get away from his fingers fucking up into you.

Your sore nipples and cunt get a moment of reprieve as he moves down to concentrate on marking bites all over your plush thighs. Instantly, you miss being full.

When he passes your empty, clenching cunt for the third time to suck bruises on your inner thighs, you burst.

“Daddy, please, please, fuck me!”

Hitoshi trails kisses up your heated skin to your throat, laving over the hickies he left.

“Beautiful,” he croons as he finally positions his tip against your hole and pushes in. The praise and stretch make you whine. He stills as your tiny cunt clenches around him. Your warm, drenched walls wrapping around his cock makes him toss his head back in pleasure.

“My patient good girl,” he groans, pulling at your nipples.

“Fuck—more, daddy, more,” you curse as you squirm, your hips rocking up to meet his shallow thrusts. He doesn’t reply and grazes his fangs over your pulse point as he holds your hips down.

Your breath hitches—and he abruptly pulls back.

“Did my baby think I was going to bite her?” Hitoshi gives you a lazy smirk as he keeps his vexingly slow pace, watching his cock drag in and out of your creaming cunt.

His large hand wrapping around your neck makes you squeak and suddenly tighten around him. Your favorite necklace. Knowing he’s using an insignificant fraction of his strength to please you makes your eyes roll back as your breath stutters.

“That’s it, cum for me, pretty girl.” Hitoshi starts a punishing pace as he strokes your clit with his free hand. His dark eyes never leave his hand wrapped around your throat, your ravishing lightheaded face and your bouncing tits. Hitoshi’s furrowed expression as he drags his tongue over his canines in concentration makes you whimper.

You buck against him, gushing around him and crying out his name.

The way you cum so prettily for him has Hitoshi hissing your name in your ear as he thrusts deep into your spasming cunt, chasing his own release. Intertwining his hands with yours, he presses you into the mattress to pin you down. Before long, his orgasm washes over him.

You gaze contentedly at Hitoshi as he pulls out, feeling empty already—and then you realize.

“Hitoshi! I swear to god if I look like a grape again,” you threaten as you try to stand up to head to the bathroom.

You don’t even take a step before he whisks you into his bathroom, laughing at you and kissing your forehead.

Well. You suppose looking like a grape isn’t that bad.

#bnha smut #shinsou smut #mha smut #pomoboba writes #pomoboba.nsfw #shinso smut #hitoshi shinsou smut

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chudleycanonficfest · 3 years

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More or Less

Day 17, Story #2 is by @bavalon18

Theme: You Did What?!

Title: More or Less

Rating: Teen

Canon Pairing: implied Harry/Ginny, Ron/Hermione, Trio Friendship

Summary: Harry engages in some “locker room” talk and immediately regrets it.

Trigger Warning: A character makes a comment that is homophobic or at the very least, implies being LGBTQ+ is a choice but that character is an asshole.

Harry groaned, stretching his neck and pulled his robes out of his locker.

“Not the young guy anymore, hey Potter,” asked Sam Abears, his dueling partner from that morning with a smile.

“Oi! I’ve barely cracked my twenties,” Harry laughed. “But yeah, that last jinx kicked my arse. Nice one.”

“Thanks,” the younger auror smiled. Harry chuckled to himself. Given how much he had enjoyed leading the DA, he shouldn’t have been surprised that he got a lot of satisfaction out of the mornings he spent training the newest recruits. Being Harry Potter was a real annoyance at times but as he got older, he had learned how to use his influence and reach. Deserved or not, he knew that his praise resonated strongly with these trainees and it seemed to motivate them through some of the tough stretches in their training.

“Out of practice, Potter?”

Okay, so not all of the trainees were impressed with him.

Abears rolled his eyes at the voice. “I was giving him a hard time, Moore. He was probably taking it easy on me.”

Mathias Moore strutted into the locker room, towel around his waist. A Slytherin four years behind Harry at Hogwarts, he didn’t share the Death Eater sympathies that many of Harry’s classmates had but he shared many of their personality traits. He was part of the same training class as Abears and was, to put it kindly, a total prat.

“Maybe it’s more that he’s out of shape. Not getting the same exercise he was before,” Moore smirked.

Of course, Moore’s big mouth attracted the attention of several others in the area. “He’s getting the same exercise as you,” piped up another auror, Titus Learn. “You think Potter is shirking the exercise regimen?”

“I mean, we all saw that article right? Potter’s girlfriend is sooo busy, off with the other little Harpies,” said Moore.

Harry sighed. This was always the road of ribbing that Moore went down. Ginny had been incredibly busy but even with the busy road schedule, ambitious training and all of the press coverage, she made time for him and kept their relationship a priority. Not that it was anyone’s damn business.

“Not to overstep Potter but she looked pretty amazing in that Quidditch Weekly spread. I’m a bit jealous,” said Learn. A couple other aurors made noises of agreement.

“She did that shoot with that hot new blonde chaser who was bragging that she’s into birds. Maybe Potter’s girlfriend stayed on the Harpies but switched teams.”

“Ugh, not okay mate,” said Abears.

“I’m just saying, three years on the Harpies… maybe she’s more into quaffles than brooms now,” snickered Moore.

“Don’t worry Moore, Ginny is spending plenty of her time riding on my broom,” Harry shot back. The group that had been observing him and Moore burst into laughter and catcalls.

“Harry!”

Harry froze at the sound of the voice, sharp and familiar over the laughter still surrounding him. He was a complete idiot. In his anger, he had completely forgotten the fact that his best friend would likely be using the exact same locker room. Harry slowly turned around. “Yeah?”

“Stop yapping and hurry up,” barked Ron, running a hand through his wet hair. “Hermione’s going to have my bollocks if I’m late to meet her for lunch. Meet me outside.” And with that, Ron left the locker room.

Fuck.

+++++++++++++++++++++++

Five minutes later, Harry slunk out of the locker room to find his friends talking quietly. Maybe Ron didn’t even hear what I said.

“Finally,” huffed Hermione. Ron was next to her, frowning. Oh yeah, he heard me. “You know that if we wait until noon to leave, the waits at all the restaurants are a nightmare.”

“Sorry, sorry,” apologized Harry, falling into step behind them.

They all entered the half full lift and Hermione pushed the button for the main lobby. As the lift whizzed through the ministry, Hermione seemed to have relaxed and was happily chattering about a meeting that she had that morning. Harry studied Ron carefully. He seemed okay now; in fact, Ron was gazing at Hermione with the lovestruck look he always got when she went on a particularly passionate tear. I'm such an idiot. Moore’s comment was so ridiculous; I should have just let it go. But no, I had to shoot my mouth off. Maybe I should consider bowing out of lunch. Give Ron an opportunity to be totally distracted by Hermione and he’ll forget I said -

“Harry! Come on,” said Hermione, looking exasperated.

Harry’s shoulders slumped. There was no way out of this now. Hermione was irritated and if he tried to stay back, she was going to demand to know why. Defeated, he trailed after them.

As they stepped on the streets of Muggle London, Ron slung an arm around Hermione and they resumed their conversation with Harry quietly walking alongside them.

“Mortimer’s?” Hermione asked, pointing at the small sandwich shop they were in front of.

Harry was about to agree but then looked at his friends and a memory sprung to mind. “Uh, no,” he cringed.

Hermione let out a growl of frustration. “Harry…”

“What about the curry place you like two doors down?” Harry suggested quickly. He really couldn’t afford to piss Hermione off as well. He needed her on his side when Ron inevitably went off.

“I thought you weren’t a fan of that place,” she replied, looking at him with narrowed eyes.

“Sounds good today,” Harry said. Hermione glanced at Ron, who shrugged and led the way.

A few minutes later, they were seated and Harry was looking at the menu when he felt eyes in him. He glanced up to see Hermione studying him intensely. He gave her a weak smile and took a sip of his water.

“Harry, what is going on? Are you okay?”

“Uh, yeah, yeah, I’m fine. No problems here.”

“Did something happen at the training session?” Hermione asked.

Harry looked down at the menu and shook his head.

“Did something happen at the training session?” Hermione repeated, this time looking at Ron.

“No,” said Ron, looking at Harry for the first time since they sat down. “It was completely norm—oh.” Something seemed to click and Ron rolled his eyes. “Harry, I know you’re shagging my sister.”

Harry immediately began to choke on the water he had been sipping.

“Ron!” Hermione exclaimed.

“That’s what he’s being weird about,” Ron insisted. “Isn’t it?”

Harry took a long drink of water and managed to get his throat cleared. “Look, I swear mate, I didn’t mean to say anything like that. It just slipped out.”

“What slipped out?” Hermione asked.

“One of the trainees was making these jokes about Ginny and her teammates and… I got defensive and made some stupid broomstick joke,” Harry said, feeling his face get hot.

“I get it,” Ron said. “I figured it was Moore being an arse. He’s so weirdly aggressive about everyone’s sex life. Every Auror gets caught up with Moore and says more than we intend to at some point. I don’t get why you’ve got your wand in a knot. Just because I don’t want the details of what you two get up to doesn’t mean that it bothers me that it’s happening.”

Harry stared at him.

“It’d be worse if it wasn’t happening, I reckon,” Ron contemplated, taking a sip of his own water.

“What?” said Hermione, looking almost as surprised as Harry.

Ron shrugged. “If you and I weren’t having sex, we’d be pretty miserable, wouldn’t we?”

“Yes, I suppose,” she agreed. “And likely making everyone around us miserable.”

“See? I don't want my sister or my best mate trapped in a miserable relationship! What kind of life is that? Why are the two of you acting so weird about this?”

“I would give anything for a Time Turner and a portable Pensieve so I could show your sixteen-year-old self this conversation,” Hermione pointed out.

“Yeah, well, that prat wasn’t regularly shagging his dream girl so he was a bit uptight,” Ron grinned. Hermione rolled her eyes but bit her lower lip, which made Harry cringe. These were classic flirting signs between the two of them and he now really regretted not skipping lunch.

“Wait,” said Hermione suddenly. “You said that ‘every Auror has got caught up’ with Moore and said ‘more than we intend’. Does ‘every Auror’ include you?”

“What’s that now?” asked Ron, ears turning red. “Uh, let’s place our order, yeah?”

#submission #canon fest platonic #hp canon pairings #canon fest romantic #chudleycanonficfest2021 #HP fest #ron x hermione #ron weasley #hp fanfic #hermione granger #harry potter #trio friendship #hinny #tw: implied homophobia

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shirophantomvox · 3 years

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Chrollo, Hisoka, and Illumi Headcanons

Chrollo, Hisoka, Illumi, and Leorio headcanons

Hello, anon! I am so sorry for taking longer than usual to respond to this post. I have been so busy with A LOT lately but I have time now! I don’t know if you want N/SFW, romantic or non so I’ll go based on what comes to mind! I know many Tumblr users have made these types of assumptions for them a lot but I wanted to join in. I started writing this last night so forgive me if there are any unbearable grammar errors. I hope you like it anon, I tried my best. I have to work on my headcanons for them because I try to keep them in character. Since we don’t have much background info on ⅔, I have to keep it as realistic as possible. FYI N/SFW content is mentioned.

Discord for Voltron and HxH fans

Let’s start with Chrollo.

Chrollo (SFW)

I’ve seen on here that a lot of you headcanon Chrollo to be an understanding man when it comes to feelings for his significant other. Given his soft voice and calm demeanor, I’m sure that is somewhat true.

It seems like Chrollo isn’t on board with over-the-top PDA meaning he would agree to hand-holding and his arm around you but nothing more. He saves the...other stuff for when you two are alone. Because of Chrollo’s past, it seems like he wouldn’t want to be seen in public that much because that can cause him to get caught by the authorities.

He takes your safety very seriously. You understand that when he is with the Phantom Troupe that you are not to interrupt until the business is over. He doesn’t allow you to get involved with the missions because of how dangerous they can be (example: the auction). He knows you can handle it, he prefers for you not to be involved. Feelings and work can make things difficult.

Although Chrollo hides in the shadows, I imagine he lives in a penthouse with expensive furniture, white and black color pattern, and large windows that have an astonishing view of Yorknew.

After you both have worked long and hard, you open the door just to see the lights dimmed so dark that it matches the night atmosphere. There are rose petals leading to the bathroom where a bubble bath is waiting. As you enter the bathroom, your boyfriend is waiting there, submerged in bubbles sticking his arms out. Candles light up the tiny room casting a romantic shadow from your body. You grab his hand and gently sit in the tub. The warm water felt amazing; it helped your aching muscles (from exercising) feel better. Chrollo gently grabbed your arm and pulled you into a warm, loving embrace. He wrapped his toned arms around your body and rested his chin on your shoulder. He didn’t say a word but instead breathed heavily, kissed your shoulder, and leaned back against the wall. On days like this, he didn’t say much but his actions spoke louder than words.

Chrollo NSFW

I think Chrollo is a passionate lover. This assumption comes from his calm demeanor. He seems to be incredibly patient so if you aren’t positioning yourself the right way or something, he’ll work with you to make sure you get it and you are comfortable.

He is touchy. That means during the nitty-gritty, he likes to touch your face, chin, lips, and your torso as a way to show more affection.

When he is in the mood, he moves slowly then very fast. He cannot resist the urges and feelings he has for you.

He loves to do this while the drapes are open although you have expressed that you like your privacy. It’s ironic. He doesn’t like extreme PDA but is ok with sleeping with you while the lights from the city shine near your penthouse window. Ah, guys are confusing.

After the climax, he lays flat on the bed and pulls you close. He leaves about an inch in between because heat is still radiating off your bodies and it’s summertime.

Hisoka (SFW) If his significant other was shy.

People have mixed feelings about Hisoka, feelings, and whether or not if he is gentle or not. I don’t think that Hisoka is gentle but begins to lay off the harsh jokes or pranks as he sees that you both have fought before and you’re not as weak as he thought.

Unlike Chrollo, he is all for PDA. This ranges from hand holding to playful kisses to passionate kisses. When I saw Hisoka for the first time, I immediately thought he was a fuck boy. A fuck boy is a boy that is only interested in sleeping with someone and doesn’t intend on pursuing a relationship.

He’d take the pleasure of appreciating your presence as well as testing your patience. If you are shy and are easily flustered, he will change that. He’ll do things like kissing you, calling you affectionate names, or anything that will cause you to respond. You hit him jokingly. Still not getting the message, he continues and you hit him harder. This is where he releases a medium moan which causes everyone to look in your direction. You freeze; face flushed and he’s laughing his ass off.

“What’s the matter,” he asks, covering his mouth. “You look flushed~♥.”

“You’re doing too much. Stop playing around! People are staring~💯.” You cover the side of your face. True enough you were a little mortified but in a good way. You knew he did this because he liked you but sometimes he played too much.

This is when he pulls you closer to his face, your ear next to his mouth, and whispers something in your ear that sent chills down your spine that made you blush more than before. He nearly puckered his lips as he spoke. He took his index finger and thumb to caress your cheek.

“Raising your voice at me? That simply won’t do. Aren’t you aware of the consequences~♥?”

You knew better than to not say anything because he would cup your cheeks and pull you into a deep kiss, and wouldn’t let go until he was sure that everyone was looking.

Both of you enjoy red, white, and rose wine. To him, wine equals classiness and sophistication. After fighting each other for hours (which he considers training for you and exercise for him) drinking wine and watching Lifetime (television for idiots) is a great way to end the night.

NSFW

As stated above, I originally thought that Hisoka was a fuck boy, so I am going to roll with that thought. This man has the potential of being rough and if he is too rough this is the time where you can speak up and say so. He’ll listen to you. Similar to Chrollo, he can be very romantic if he wants to. The rose petals gimmick was played out.

Instead, he hides in the darkest part of the living room waiting for you.

You turn on the lights and immediately head to the kitchen to drink a bottle of ice-cold water. Summer nights in Yorknew were hot and humid, almost unbearable. It felt like you were being suffocated. Becoming impatient, Hisoka clears his throat loudly causing you to nearly jump out of your skin; choking on the water you were drinking. He released a sexy chuckle. When you turned around, there stood your chiseled buff boyfriend bare with a ribbon tied in various directions around his body. Your birthday was two days ago and he was your gift. Although you have seen him like this before, for some reason you were too flustered to make a move. He already knew that you were tired from work, so he carried you in his arms to the Exercise Room and laid you gently on the floor. You smiled as a rush or passion took over your body resulting in you tearing off the ribbon tightly wrapped around his body. Since this was your birthday gift, he made it a night you’d remember forever! Surprisingly, no roughhousing, just soft and gentle. This proves that Hisoka has the capability of being humane. His strokes were to your liking and the gazes that you both exchanged were mind-blowing. Why couldn’t he be this way all the time? After it all, you fell asleep at her quickly. You were on the floor but now on top of your king-sized bed, with the message control on high. He stayed awake, watching TV, and thought about how he was going to pick a fight with you at the crack of dawn.

Hisoka’s ability to flirt and send the intended person swooning is a talent of itself. Lots of people do not possess this talent. Sometimes it's intentional and sometimes it's not. He speaks softly and smoothly, are he has to do is ask and it shall be done.

Illumi SFW

Illumi gives the impression that he is a “quiet” freak. This means that true enough he is focused on his job but if the moment comes along he will give in. He isn’t into PDA at all and if he does feel like showing some affection it will be done in private. Even though he appears to be a zombie, laying on or even cuddling with his significant other will help him relax for once. Imagine having to complete many missions in a day, exhausted, and have a wonderful person waiting to act as a human pillow for your weary head. Even Illumi can’t resist that.

If he likes you and plans to marry you, he will make that known to everyone to avoid confusion. Illumi represents the stereotypical shy boy; he is anti-social, prefers to only be around people he knows and trusts, and carries out the duties of his job.

After everything has been completed for the day, he wouldn’t mind ( and secretly begs) for silent cuddles with his significant other and to just fall asleep. At this point, you are used to it so this is all you want and you are satisfied. When he does talk, it’s usually about something he found out from work that he knows should be kept quiet but he tells you anyway. Late nights are the time of day where Illumi vents for a few hours. The details of these vent sessions could range anywhere from “I wish you were there to see it” to “No, it would be too much”. As quiet and reserve as he is, his love is shown in a unique way that you have grown accustomed to.

NSFW

When the urge slaps him across the face like a sack of rocks, he cannot resist. Usually, he fights off the urge by exercising (mainly because you are out of the house or sleep) but this time he couldn’t shake it.

Before he gets started with anything, he styles his long hair in the shape of a bun so it doesn’t get in the way of action.

Although he is portrayed to be an emotionless zombie, he has some feeling deep inside him that he unleashes just for you. This is shown by gentle moist kisses being placed along your neck and once he reaches your shoulder that is when you wake up. Halfway through your sleepy eyes, you see a man with a devilish smile painted across his face. Who is this man? This couldn’t be your boyfriend. No way, no how.

Once he sees your sleepy smile, he just releases so many kisses that you throw the blanket off and he pulls you in closer.

Illumi will allow you both to switch the roles meaning he is in charge one time and you are on another day. Since you were still asleep, he decided to take on the role. He is surprisingly gentle in the beginning but as soon as it takes off, your ride him like a donkey. It ironic; he releases more noises than you! You have to remind him that noise travels! Great, you’re doing your job well! While it is important to take your job seriously, you need to have time to release that stress.

He uses his large eyes to stare into yours; you always found yourself lost in his gaze.

After it all, you lay back down waiting for your boyfriend to return from the kitchen. Illumi craves food like crazy after a good session. What’s better than donuts at 3 AM? COMFORT FOOD!!

These urges also come when you two are training together. Several times he’s had to guide you from behind on how to aim his needles. This time you noticed the packing of his pants which surprised you.

“Any questions,” he asked in a monotone voice.

“Yes. Why did you wear jogging pants? You’re giving yourself away.”

It was at this moment, he knew he fucked up. But let’s be honest, ok? He is standing behind the most beautiful person in the world, nostrils full of perfume, hair tied up, and has his left hand placed loosely on your thigh?! What was he thinking by wearing jogging pants when he was with you? He acted as if he didn’t know what you were talking about.

“You really don’t know?”

You kicked your backside out against him causing him to fall to the ground.

“Wow! Your legs are like jelly!”

“Why tease me,” He asked breaking out a small smile.

“You’re the one denying it.”

“Just get to it. I can’t wait any longer or else I’ll explode.”

The quiet ones are always the freakiest.

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pianorexic000 · 3 years

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Sweetspo Saturday

Hi y’all, so today is sweetspo Saturday.......

it speaks for itself. By the way, none of these are mine. I take no credit I have 0 creativity.

I dream of collarbones and thigh gaps, of hips jutting out and ribs just visible, casting shadows on porcelain flesh. I dream of crop tops and denim shorts, of thigh highs and sugar highs. And when I lay in bed at night, counting the calories of the day before my mind can’t help but wander, and I press into my doughy stomach, feel the hips hiding underneath, and remind myself how far I’ve come, and how far I still have to go.

Please listen, I know, I know it’s hard but listen, focus, you, you the most beautiful person on this whole entire planet you are going to make it, I promise you sweetheart, you’re going to make it. Think about it, think about how skinny you’ll be, how happy you will be, how you are going to be able to wear what you want, how you are going to be able to eat what you want and no one is going to make you feel bad for eating, no one. They’re going to be jealous, so fucking jealous, jealous of how you look and how you feel. They’re going to envy you. So stand up, keep your pretty head up and go. Exercise, drink water, eat less, eat healthy, sleep, do yoga, dance around. Get skinny and be finally happy. Please be finally happy.

You’ve been so disappointed in yourself lately. You’ve cursed those girls with a fast metabolism and regretted so much, sweetie. Countless of times you’ve thought, planned and wished to be skinny. I know you want this so badly, honey. But it’s never going to be given to you, sugar. You have to work for it and make yourself proud! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و

I know you’re very impatient with your weight-loss. You want to lose it NOW and would do anything to wake up tomorrow at you ugw. But that’s never going to happen, doll. It’ll take time, but you will get there, sweetie. You just have to be persistent and never give up. The road is very long, and there will be days where it’ll feel hopeless, angel. But i promise you that those days where you feel incredibly sexy and comfortable in your own skin are just around the corner. You’ll get there baby, but it’ll take time. So don’t beat yourself up.

You’ll look good in everything; you remember that bikini with the cute print? yes, you’ll look beautiful in it. you won’t look like a fat pig.

people will be jealous; they’ll envy you. you’ll become thinner while others are getting fatter.

you’ll be dainty; you’ll be the lightest in the room. everyone will be able to pick you up effortlessly.

others will compliment you; people will look at you and say “wow, have you lost weight?” “you look great!” “i wish i looked like you.”

you won’t be able to keep more than a cup of food down; you’ve trained your body, you and your body both know its limits.

you’ll have power; you can can control how you look, you’ll have control. self control instead of eating everything in sight. you’ll be proud when you refuse a chocolate bar someone is offering.

are you going to keep saying “i’ll do it tomorrow”

or are you going to start today?

you’ll get there sweetie, make them regret the day they dare call you fat; they’ll start talking GOOD behind your back; “she is losing so much weight omg” “ i wanna look like her.” “im so jealous of her tiny waist.”

make it happen, you cause the gain of weight

and the loss of weight.

It's Okay!

You were really bad this weekend weren’t you? You ate fatty food and cheated on your diet? I know you bash yourself for pushing yourself further from your goal, but it was just Easter and you were enjoying spending time with your family. Unfortunately that included eating. Thin is all you think about cutie, why would you stuff your face uncontrollably like that, sugar? You can’t stop now, i know it’s hard but it’ll be worth it in the end.

Meanspo

Dear You,

You’ve grown up being the “big” girl. You’ve grown up being the “I want seconds” girl. You entered college being the “let’s eat out because it’s easier” girl.

When will you be the “I eat healthy” girl? The “people can pick me up” girl? The “I love my body” girl?

Today? Oh, right, you say tomorrow. Funny, that’s what you said yesterday.

It’s YOUR fault you’re fat. You don’t control your fatty urges to binge and stuff your face. One day, you’ll regret that. And that day is TODAY. If you regret it, then make a change. Skip that meal. Eat less calories. Exercise and burn what you have consumed and stored from your past pathetic eating habits. Get rid of your fatty urges. BECOME SKINNY…Become beautiful. Because if you don’t start today, you’ll only hate yourself tomorrow… again.

Do it. Do it so you can wear cute short shorts without everyone looking at your thighs and being disgusted.

Do it for that bitch who always called you fat at middle school.

Do it for that fuckboy who never looked at you as girlfriend potencial.

Do it so you can be confident.No seriously you’ll never be confident with that big tummy dude.

Do it so you don't ALMOST DIE in fitting rooms.

Do it for the cute clothes.

Do it for the summer.

Do it for the pool parties and how all of your friends will be SHOOK at your perfect body.

Do it for that life little baby. You deserve it. You deserve so much happiness.

Imagine you’re sitting at your desk in your perfectly decorated bedroom. You’re doing school work (all A’s of course), and since the lighting is good, you stop studying for a second and take a selfie.

You notice your collarbones are perfectly peaking out, and your chest bones are slightly visible. You have no makeup on but you still look absolutely gorgeous. Your flawless skin (that you got from not eating junk food all the time) looks great on your camera. Your thin arms look especially toned in this picture, and your smile is unforgettable.

You decide to post it to Instagram, and it instantly gets likes and comments saying how gorgeous you look. You want to keep studying…but the amount of likes and attention is distracting!

You think to yourself “Amazing how my life has changed. 30lbs ago I barely got 30 likes. My grades were bad and I had horrible acne…it’s so great what being thin can do to a person”

One day I won’t have to suck in

One day I’ll sit down and not have belly rolls

One day my thighs won’t touch

One day I’ll be able to see my ribs

One day I’ll step on the scale and smile

One day I’ll be able to smile at my protruding collar bones

One day I’ll wear the clothes I want

One day I’ll be confident

One day I’ll be skinny

do it for the boy who leaves your snapchats at read. imagine how quickly he’ll reply when he sees how good you look in your new body. do it for the girls you envy, the girls who show up in crop tops and short shorts whilst you hide behind a baggy sweater. imagine how proud you’ll feel when you can finally wear what you want and look just as good, if not better than them. do it for the people who bullied you about your weight and the boys who turned you down because of it. watch them gawk and whisper among themselves at how much weight you’ve lost. do it for the mean girls, the ones that walk around school like they own the place, the ones who’s parties you never get invited to, the ones that all the boys want. prove yourself to them. soon they’ll notice you and you’ll be too proud to care. own your new found confidence, throw your own parties, feel wanted. do it for the boy you’ve been crushing on since the first time you met. make him want you just as you wanted him. laugh at yourself as he chases after you. watch him suffer just as you did. do it for the bikini you’ve never had the body to wear. make your old self proud. wear that bikini. finally feel good in it. go to the beach and the pool and show it off. it belongs on you. do it for yourself. do it for your own happiness and do it right now. you deserve this. it might take some time and maybe you’re growing impatient. but it’s okay, everything good takes time. so be safe, stay strong, and don’t give up. this will be worth the wait. trust me.

I literally cannot fucking wait until I’m thin. I can’t wait to not feel like the outsider in my friend group. I can’t wait to not feel like the ugly friend. I can’t wait to be as thin as my best friend and for people to not see me as a charity case. I can’t wait to be able to go shopping and not worry about what will hide my fat. I can’t wait to see my collarbones and feel great in shorts. I can’t wait to be able to post selfies confidently from any angle and get as many likes as all the thin girls from school. I can’t wait to be someone else’s thinspo. I can’t wait to be happy with myself. I can’t wait to be thin.

Okie lovey, I know you might have had a rough couple of days or maybe you’ve been doing everything right and you just need a little pick me up. That’s okay too. I’m here for you, maybe not there physically but I’m still here. Make some tea, and take a bath; while you’re in there light a few candles and take time for yourself. Paint your nails read a book or simply think about bettering yourself. You’re almost there, I’m so excited for you! I’m going to be there when you cross that finish line (UGW). Finished with tea? Are you hungry? No. Exactly, chin up sweetheart, you got this. I love you

10 Reasons I want to be Thin

1. A flat stomach looks so good in anything. 2. No more armpit fat. 3. Finally have a thigh gap (again). 4. Feel beautiful and in control 5. people you already know will ask you how you did it, new people you meet will fall in love with you. 6. Go on adventures and have fun without worrying about your fat jiggling around. 7. Tan outside or at the lake without wanting to die because you’re too fat for a bikini. 8. Going out to parties and making friends because you’re confident and beautiful. 9. Not wanting to cry every time you see your full body in a mirror/ reflection. 10. Not crying in general anymore. Finally being happy.

11 Reasons Why I'm Doing This

1. To be the skinny friend

2. So I can be lifted up and be called light

3. To wear anything and still look cute

4. To have pretty bones to show off

5. To hear those words; ‘Have you lost weight?’

6. To not feel guilty when having a sweet treat (occasionally!)

7. To wear tight jeans and not have a muffin top

8. To not want to cry every time I look in the mirror

9. To not feel embarrassed in a bikini or swimsuit

10. To sit on someone’s lap without fear of crushing them

11. To finally feel happy with myself

They are in the kitchen making dinner. It smells so good, and all you want to do is have some. But would that make you happy? Would that food actually do anything for you? Sure, it would taste good. But as soon as you swallow, it would be gone. You’d take a drink of water, and the taste would wash away. Five minutes of fun, and then you’d be full. Full of food, regret, hate, shame, and disgust. Today would be yet another day wasted. So go ahead, eat the food. Be the fat tub of lard you always have been. Or don’t. Don’t eat the food. Be a day closer to your goal.

The choice is yours.

#sweetspo #proana #anorexia #edthings

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