Tumgik
#I do understand the worth of pure joy but I do need a bit more. emotional balance
aroaessidhe · 9 months
Text
Tumblr media
2023 reads // twitter thread
Catnip
space explorer goes to restore an abandoned Venus colony, falls in a vat of nanites turning her into a catgirl
about coming to terms with being a trans woman & also falling in love with the perviously-dormant lesbian AI from the station
8 notes · View notes
kisakis-boyfriend · 6 months
Note
May I request something with dragon Freminet? I’m not… entirely sure how do to this, but a friend introduced me to the concept and it won’t leave me alone now. Dragony boy, like Neuvilette- or maybe Yanfei would be a more apt comparison, for a part human one. Something soft if possible? Headcanons or some sort of scenarjo
Dragon Freminet
Tumblr media
Pairings: Freminet x reader
Warnings: GN!reader, Dragon!Freminet, all fluff + a tiny bit of hurt/comfort
Genre/Format: Fluff; Headcannons
Author's Note: Oooohh Dragon Freminet is a cute idea! I took a few liberties with his design, though he is still depicted as mostly human. I hope you enjoy these, anon :3
Please check my blog title to verify whether requests are closed or not! Thank you!
Tumblr media
Cryo Dragon Freminet who's such a sensitive soul. He's only capable of partially understanding human emotions, though when he does feel them they hit him hard. Overwhelming waves of sadness, joy, despair, anxiety, or love that empty his mind of anything else
Oftentimes you're the only person who can help him deal with these emotions. Helping him through bouts of despair or profound sadness, sometimes prompted by insignificant things such as accidentally dropping something. It's enough to bring forth a flood of tears from the poor boy, but you're more than willing to help him
You'll reassure him of his worth, tell him over and over again that he is not a failure. Remind him of how strong he is while cupping his freckled cheeks, kiss his pretty lips and nose until that smile that you love so much comes back
Dragon Freminet who is the biggest cuddle monster of them all. Especially when he has a loving partner to cuddle up with! He basks in your warmth and comfort whenever you're kind enough to indulge his needs. With arms wrapped around his torso and your legs tangled with his, resting underneath his favorite blanket that his Father gifted him, Freminet purrs from deep within his chest
It's a deep rumbling unlike anything else in this world. The content (or distressed/threatening) sounds of an elemental dragon can influence a human's emotions, causing the human to either feel complete relief and safety or fear/terror, if the dragon is threatening them
Dragon Freminet who's embarrassed by your endless stream of compliments about his draconic features. You ask him to open his mouth a bit so that you can catch a peak of his terribly sharp fangs, carefully tapping their points with the pad of your thumb as you admire them. Or staring into his gorgeous blue eyes, memorizing the swirls of multiple colours mixed in
Even finding the time to coo about how cool his true form looks! While Freminet is quite small compared to other dragons and dragon adjacent beings, he is massive compared to humans, easily towering over you like a god. You stare up at him during one of the rare moments when he actually reveals his true form, wide-eyed and unable to move in pure awe at the sight of your boyfriend before you
Dragon Freminet who adores winter activities, as most of them make him feel connected to his element, cryo. He begs you to play in the snow with him, or to teach you how to ice skate! You do have to remind him that your human body can't withstand the cold in the same way that his can though...yours needs breaks to warm back up unless you want to get sick...
And Freminet will happily oblige, bringing you back inside and hugging you tightly to help you warm up. He'll breathe on your icy hands and envelope them within his own, covering your fingers with his until your skin is pleasantly warm. If he's feeling particularly bold Freminet might pull you closer and breathe down your neck, hot puffs of breath that cause you to warm up incredibly quick, especially your cheeks
Dragon Freminet who keeps multiple hordes of items. Collecting different mechanical parts and scraps that catch his eye, broken down gardemeks, gears, and children's toys that are no longer on the market. He also has a more intimate horde of things related to you in some way. Things that you give him, trinkets he thinks you would like, even a few things from your past that you gifted to him specifically for this collection. These things are his most precious treasures, besides you of course. You'll always be his number one treasure 💙
Tumblr media
Reblogs are extremely appreciated <3
149 notes · View notes
throneofsapphics · 6 months
Note
Hii, I love your writing 🫶🏻
Could you write something about lidia cervos X reader once you finish the crescent city series plss?? ( she’s in the second book).
It’s impossible to find stories with her
cruel kindness  
Summary: You and Lidia are in a secret relationship. 
Warnings: maybe angst-ish
A/N: sorry this took months, here’s a drabble! I’m a bit nervous about this but excited to write more with her! especially after the third comes out
You were her safety. Her salvation. Her light in the darkness. You knew exactly what she was, and stayed. Lidia could never understand why. It haunted her mind at night - she should tell you you’re wrong for her, leave you for her own safety. Selfish, she’d told herself multiple times and visited with the intention of leaving permanently but the pure joy radiating from you each time you met … Lidia couldn’t bring herself to break that. To shatter your heart. It was a different kind of cruelty. 
The two of you were lucky if you could meet three or four times a year, and she cherished every minute. You’d asked of him, of what she had to sacrifice. The Hind didn’t harbor many fears, but your discovery was one. If anyone somehow figured out what you were to her, the fallout might be the thing that broke her. You were so dangerous for her, for what she worked her entire life for, but she couldn’t stay away. 
She rolled over in your bed, a plush and soft mattress, assorted blankets piled over both of you to take the chill off. You were splayed on your stomach, soft lips parted and hair covering half of your face. 
She carefully pushed a few strands from your face, brushing her thumb across the soft skin of your cheek. Her amber eyes softened, lips curving into a gentle smile - one you may be the only living person to witness. 
You wrapped your arms around her, squeezing tightly. A bright smile shone on your face, so full of love and joy. Weight lifted from your shoulders as she tucked you back in. You didn’t comment on the stray tear dripping down your shoulder. Seven months, the longest you’d been apart so far and only eighteen hours together this time. Lidia had set a timer on her watch for the moment she needed to leave and swore she wouldn’t look at it. 
You dragged her inside. New decorations - assorted paintings and different pillows lining the couch. Her eyes swept the room and you let out a low laugh. “You never miss a thing,” you teased her. Her mouth curved into a smile and she pulled you close to her again, breathing in your nutmeg and honey scent. 
Dawn rays peeked through the curtains casting a warm glow over the room. You didn’t stir at the small buzzing of her watch and her eyes shuttered closed. A slow breath later, she slipped out of the room - feet silent and steady despite the pain in her chest. A note pinned under the salt shaker, and Lidia shifted. 
-
You blinked your eyes open, still heavy with sleep and frowned at the empty half of your bed. She warned you she would be gone when you woke, but you still hated it. 
Twenty five years of secrecy wore you down but Lidia was worth it. There had never been a doubt in your mind. This love was cruel, a teasing example of what life could be like in a different world. You took a few breaths.  What was a few decades compared to centuries? Lidia had promised you’d be free together one day and she’d never broken a promise to you. Whatever she did to make that happen, you never asked. Like you never asked about her … work. The Lidia you knew was different and you prayed you’d never meet the time. Of course, you didn’t hate what she did to survive, but seeing the cold and bored look in her eyes - the casual cruelty, might make you do something drastic and stupid. 
30 notes · View notes
lt-catbolt · 6 months
Text
I've been thinking a little bit about how my OCs love
Not like, romantically. Just how they love, how they grow attached to things or people. It can be such a fundamental part of a character, but I feel like it's something that doesn't get talked about a lot. So here, have some of my OCs as an example.
Melatron loves out of fascination. He loves things because they're quirky, or different, or stand out. He loves things he can't understand, because quite frankly, there's so much about the world he doesn't understand. He loves the thrill of watching someone solve a Rubik's cube, the high of meeting someone unpredictable, the chaos of improvisation. Oh sure, the randomness of it all can catch him off guard, but deep down he loves the unpredictability because it's what he longs to be. Different. Special. Something worth remembering.
Silvern loves out of conviction. He loves things because he believes that all things deserve to be loved. He loves without exception because he knows that oftentimes, exceptions are the ones who need the love the most. He loves rusty swords and torn sleeves, the joy of prying a smile out of a stern face, the little beautiful things all around him that deserve the attention they never get. Oh sure, sometimes his passionate adoration is met with cold steel, but he keeps trying because it's what he'd want others to do for him. Love, without prejudice or condescension.
Cooper would have you believe he doesn't love anything, but that's a lie. He loves out of honour. He loves those who have earned his respect, not by fearmongering but by honest identity, because he knows how much it can cost to be yourself. He loves a well-made instrument, a fine blade, and seeing people truly in their element, unafraid of him or his reputation. Oh sure, he'll never show it outside the most select of circles, but he cares deeply for those who know who they are, because he doesn't have a clue. Who is he, if not a monster?
Gilden loves out of wonder. They love anything that is pure or kind, because they have seen so much that is neither of those things. They love the soft downy feathers of baby birds, the innocent laughter of children, the generosity in small gestures of kindness. Oh sure, there is plenty about the world not worth loving, but that only makes them more determined to guard what little innocence still persists. Keep it safe, so it need never be burnt by fire as they have been.
Jazz loves out of excitement. She loves things because they distract her from the burdens of reality, and give her a taste of a better life. She loves the adrenaline rush of a good heist, the thrill of learning new skills, the heat of fire as it breezes past her cheeks. Oh sure, sometimes she'll get her caught red-handed, but what good is a gamble without any risk? If pursuit of knowledge doesn't involve a high-speed chase, can you really call it a "pursuit"?
anyway this has been Cat infodumping about her OCs, thank you all for sticking around-- and if you got this far, reblog this with how your OCs love, i'm curious 👀
8 notes · View notes
justanisabelakinnie · 6 months
Text
Tumblr media
I hate this fucking picture so much you guys have no idea. It completely misses the point of each of these princesses' movies. Ik we've all seen this shitty image before, but I'd still like to deconstruct each of these messages one-by-one:
Let's start with Snow White: "At first it may seem terrible, being so beautiful that other women get jealous enough to try and kill you. But don't worry, once your beauty attracts a man, he'll protect you." Totally fucking wrong. While I do concede that Snow White gets almost killed by the Evil Queen for being more beautiful than her, and how this can send a sexist message about women's motivations and relationships with each other, Snow White was far from relying on a prince to "protect" her. Sure, she sang about wanting her prince to come, but she spent a large portion of the movie living with the seven dwarves and cooking and cleaning with them. She showed a lot of inner strength for a fourteen-year-old girl who was hiding for her life because of a vindictive and jealous queen. She was strong-willed, kind, compassionate, charismatic, and found the beauty and joy in the simple things in life. And once again, she sings about wanting her prince to come, but what's the matter with that? In my mind, this is a sign not of her passive domesticity or sign as a damsel in distress, but a display of her unwavering optimism and bravery, her ability to see the silver lining in a situation and look forward to a more hopeful future, a better tomorrow, is what makes her a strong female character in my eyes.
Next, Cinderella: "If you're beautiful enough, you may be able to escape your terrible living conditions by getting a wealthy man to fall for you." Not at all what fucking happened. Cinderella didn't escape her abusive household just by batting her eyes at the prince. She got out because of the help of her fairy godmother, and because of her strong will and ability to stay pure and kind even with all the horrible stuff that she went through at the hands of her evil stepfamily. Cinderella's movie does NOT teach that a princess' only worth is the ability to look pretty and snag a man. It teaches the importance of kindness and perserverance, and, similar to Snow White, of being optimistic and looking forward to a better life than the one you have, not letting the horrible circumstances you are under get you down. I'm getting really tired of people acting like Cinderella's message is only to be a dutiful housewife and scrub floors until a man saves you from your dreadful existence, when it is quite literally the opposite.
Sleeping Beauty: "Pretty girls don't even need to be alive to get some hot princely action." is such a disturbing way to look at the movie and also such a narrow thing to focus on. While, yes, I can understand being disturbed by her being kissed while she was asleep, true love's kiss is a trope that has been around since the invention of fairytales, it's not meant to justify sexual assault, it's meant to be a show of...well, true love. And while I don't blame anyone for being uncomfortable with it, it is still leagues better than what happened in Sun, Moon, and Talia, the original version of this fairytale. Seriously, go look up what happened there, if you don't know already. Traumatized much? I will admit though that it can be frustrating to not see Aurora do much but snooze throughout her movie, but she still shows way more personality than just being a slumbering damsel in distress; she is shown to be sweet, idealistic, humble, kindhearted, a little bit mischievous, and also somewhat sheltered and mistrusting of strangers. Plus, Enchanted Tales gives her more of a fun-loving, dorky, and silly personality, and sure, a lot of people shit on this portrayal(as seen here), but we should all be glad that they gave Aurora more of a personality than just being the perfect, swan-like, graceful princess that she was often seen as prior. I mean, it makes more sense that she would act like this, as she's not quite used to being a princess yet.
Belle: "Appearances don't matter, what counts is what's in your heart. Unless you're the girl." Oh really? Then clearly we weren't watching the same movie. Belle has never been reduced to just her appearance. She has been shown from the onset to be a smart, independent, bookish, dreamy, and adventurous young woman. While it's true that the other townspeople say she is the most beautiful girl in their village, they also spend a lot of time gossiping about how weird and strange she is for liking to read, which was seen as rather unbecoming of a woman in that time period. The only one who objectifies her and reduces her to just a pretty face is Gaston. He only "loves" Belle and wants to marry her because she is the most beautiful girl in town, and the only one "as beautiful as him". He's beautiful, she's beautiful, therefore they are a match, and for no other reason. Belle was never reduced to just her appearance, and in fact it was quite the opposite, with Belle's kind and compassionate heart being what wins over the Beast and breaks the spell. Or are you just mad that she wasn't the one who became a big, ugly beast? Which, btw, is also ignoring the point and themes of the movie?
Ariel(holy shit this is my LEAST favorite one): "It's okay to abandon your family, drastically change your body, and give up your strongest trait in order to get your man. Once he sees your pretty face, only a witch's spell could draw his eyes away from you." I am so sick of saying and repeating this, but Ariel did not give up her voice and seek humanity only to chase a man. I AM SO SICK AND FUCKING TIRED OF PEOPLE CONTINUOUSLY PARROTING THIS LIE!!!! Ariel has always been shown to have a keen interest in human life and becoming a human herself even before she met Eric. Or did we all just sleep on "Part of Your World"? Hmmmm??? And furthermore, Ariel did not get Eric just by having a pretty face. Sure, she didn't have a voice, but they became lovers because of their similar tastes, Ariel's thirst for adventure, her dorky and curious personality, and ability to be friends with everyone she meets. She was not just a boy-crazy ditz who only cared about snagging a bite of that man-candy, and I am going to start biting and maiming the next person who dares slander my girl Ariel with this fabrication of an event that didn't actually happen.
And finally, Jasmine: "As a woman, your political worth is reduced to your marriageability." I...I just...*sigh* You really didn't pay much attention to the movie itself, did you? Jasmine's entire plot was that she didn't want to be reduced to a bargaining chip, with no power or worth of her own other than being the wife of a Sultan. She wanted to marry for love, to be more than just a prize to be won. And in the end, she gets that through marriage with a man whom she actually loves, Aladdin. She is not reduced to her marriageability, because in the end, she actually gets a CHOICE on who she marries. She gets some free will and is able to make her own decisions. She becomes more than a prize to be won, and only gets with a man because she wants to, not because it's been decided for her. She gets her happy ending because she FIGHTS for it, not because it's all she's worth. For Pete's sake.
Another thing about these shitty complaints that they ALL have in common is that they reduce all of the princesses down to their physical attributes. As if the movie is sending the message that your beauty is all that matters when you're a Disney Princess. Which is NOT FUCKING TRUE. While, yes, all of these princesses are beautiful, and their beauty is a large part of their character, it is not the only part of their character, it is not even the biggest part of their character, and none of these women are reduced to being just pretty objects for a man to win. They all have personalities and goals and messages to send that are about more than their appearances, or that even critique the idea that their beauty and status as princesses are all there is to them. They are not just bubbleheaded bimbos who wait around for man all day and look cute. They are SO MUCH MORE than that, and quite frankly, the fact that you are cherrypicking details from the movies to show that their looks are all that matter in their storylines shows that, in truth, YOU are the one boiling these women down to nothing but being beautiful. Not the movie. But YOU. YOU are to blame. I won't say that these movies are above criticism, but also have some self-awareness and critical thinking skills, and quit projecting your own misogyny onto these Disney Princesses, who are all remarkable heroines/characters in their own right.
I can't stand it when people slander the Disney Princesses in such shallow and misogynistic ways, and will defend them until the end of time.
7 notes · View notes
Note
hi! do you have any tips for a new/just starting out royal simblr? anything you can tell me is greatly appreciated.
also, one more thing: any tips for how to place/adjust tiaras using the hat slider? i’m seriously losing my actual mind over here trying to position tiaras and i don’t even know if i’m doing it right 🤣 ty!
Hello Friend!
First, let me just say how wonderful it is you're wanting to create your very own story and share it with the world! It's truly so much fun, so welcome aboard! I'm happy to impart some wisdom and knowledge, as best as I am able!
Here are some tips:
Make sure to tell a story that is for you. It's not wise, or advisable, to come in with a mindset to tell a story to try and get likes and to please others. For at the end of the day, you are your biggest fan. You are the one who will live and breathe your characters, your storyline, and everything in relation to it, so it is important to keep yourself in mind when writing/creating. For me, I am a storyteller at heart. I live, breathe, eat, sleep everything that is Thornolia and its characters. Just today I wrote a scene what takes place 20 years in the future, because I couldn't stop seeing it in my mind. And just the other day I spent time doing some research for worldbuilding purposes that will help my understanding of events to come. I love my story so much that it's what keeps me motivated to continue, even when I have to take breaks for real life things.
Remember that it's alright to take breaks. Breaks are important for many reasons. But in the realm of simblr and storytelling it can be a lot more effort than you can bear sometimes, and its alright to walk away for a bit. I'm not sure if you were around when I accidentally deleted my blog and lost an entire years worth of storytelling last year, but shortly after that happened, I took an extended break that took me away for months. Not only to mourn the loss of all my work, but also because there was major league real life drama happening in my life that needed my immediate attention. But taking the break allowed me to regroup, refresh, and come back with a clear head. After all, we are not robots. We all have lives away from our screens, and no one can expect you to always be here. Just know you are allowed to take as many breaks as you need and for as long as needed. Don't worry about numbers, those who adore you and your wonderful story will still be waiting for you.
Have fun. After all, I'm assuming that is what has inspired you to create in the first place! Using this platform is a great way to showcase that pure joy, talent, and imagination, in front of those who wish to join you for the ride! So remember to always enjoy yourself! <3
As for you question regarding tiaras and hat sliders...I can only tell you how I do it...though not sure if it'll be any use.
Generally once I've chosen a tiara, I adjust the height and width from the front by clicking on the neck and moving it up and down (for height) or moving in and out (for width) to match with the hair I've chosen.
If you need to angle it, I go into the right side view, and by click the neck again, I can adjust the angle and how far back I wish to have it. I find this side to be a bit more fiddly, but in the end I usually prevail.
I make sure the bottom of the tiara is just within the hairline, so that it looks as if it's been pinned into the hair.
A word of caution (though if things have been updated feel free to correct me): You can only adjust one hat at a time. If you are trying to create multiple outfits in CAS with different tiaras, you will find that your tiara's are in the same place as your original one throughout all the outfits. So it's best to only have one tiara/hat at a time on an outfit, lest you'll suddenly find someone who was wearing a feather in their hair that had to be massively lowered looking perfect, and then watch as they change into their winter outfit and find their hat is now coming out of their face (not speaking from experience....no....).
Hope this helps! <3
10 notes · View notes
kenobster · 1 year
Note
✨ 🎶 🦅!
Thanks for the ask ^_^
✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉
My prose is pretty. So pretty that I won't let go of certain scenes or paragraphs sometimes, even when I really should. xD
🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?
answered here
🦅 Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?
Any time in my life prior, I would've said seat of my pants... but lately it's come up in a new way.
In the past, outlining has sucked the life out of my ideas. It has ruined all the surprises, emotional twists, and lightbulb moments I get while writing. So I haven't outlined, and I've become very good at mapping out a story (even a long one!) simply by writing the first draft and revising stray plotholes in earlier scenes later.
It's been interesting writing my big bang fic tho bc it has required a bit of outlining (purely for the sake of the event organizers or artist to understand wtf is going on lol). After not risking outlining for so long, I've been shocked to find that outlining doesn't feel the same way it did when I was younger.
I think, when I was younger, outlining ruined my inspiration because my mindset was always abt the end goal, the end scene, the finale. Why continue working on a question you've already answered? But going to university (and taking an advanced literary seminar focused solely on Ursula K Le Guin's work) kinda changed my viewpoint on narratives and how the end isn't everything - how you can revisit and revisit and revisit and revisit. These days, it's not just about the overarching structure to me; every single scene, paragraph, sentence, word feels like a question in need of answering. An experiment worth conducting.
In other words, the joy of writing is not in the explicit summary but rather in the details. And because of that mindset, I'm finding that outlining does not suck the life out of my ideas anymore. Each bullet point is an individual question rather than another answer in a series, and it's fun to see what words/shapes/tones/methods are used to convey them! So idk, maybe I'll start outlining more. ^_^ It's been a fun revelation.
3 notes · View notes
scytheknite · 1 year
Text
Dating In the Modern Age, A recollection of My Lust filled Nights
I’ve been struck with the idea to experience dating freely. Simply for the fun and joy of being with and around different individuals; possibly resulting in a consistent arrangement or just a blissful experience.
So far it has been quite intriguing; an old friend, a gay man, and an athlete. Each experience- different and of its own. I would have to say my favorite date thus far was the calmest. Although it ended poorly, of some fault of my own- it was not a complete loss. I did gain a renewed love for reading and writing. 
Simply put, my uncontrolled energy can be a complete deal breaker. At this point I've begun to realize that being one’s true self on a date isn't exactly acceptable. It does seem men do not like challenges. At least these days. 
Regardless of age- anything short of an easy dip into your panties is not something they are interested in; those that are interested in more seem to have a finite expectation of what they are looking for.
Shall we begin?
The Hometown Love- As if from a hallmark film, I reconnected with a past love… Leaving myself in a very confused and annoyed state. As blissful as the night was, it culminated in me feeling rejected and as a bit of a slut. His interest in me was purely physical; even after a long evening of conversation and understanding of one another.
I believe I expected to have my feelings considered in the decision making process and was sent home in a rather unexpected way. Safe to say as attractive as he is there will not be a second date.
The Gay Man- A kind friend: he did not seem to truly understand his sexuality; only that he was interested in the taboo. A gay play was his favorite experience- A far step from mine. I will say it was fun, quite colorful, and all too emotional. My understanding and consumption of the taboo world is a conversation for another time.
His friendship is a quality I have come to appreciate over the past few weeks. 
The Athlete- Intriguing at face value, the lack of compatibility is quite apparent. Our last date ended with me in tears and uncomfortable with myself; resulting in a possible realization that I am not what he wants, needs, or would truly be happy with. 
Coming to understand these things was upsetting, yet eye opening. I would refuse to change the small bits of myself that are exciting and slightly masculine to be a subdued little princess. 
As a Queen does not allow a man- any man- to make her feel indifferent about herself.
The truly upsetting aspect of this arrangement was the undeniable chemistry. The desire we had for one another was intense… Our ability to work with and around each other was also quite beautiful. I truly enjoyed every part of the experience; aside from his inability to show true excitement and his rejection of my own. Having become fearful of my intoxication at any point- If and when I began to show any form of excitement he would immediately reject my emotion. Almost as if I had to be the perfect, calm, quiet angel; which is far from who I am. I am left in confusion as each touch was pure bliss, each moment appreciated, and each interaction was left with the desire for more. Perhaps I am not ready to change for someone else; perhaps he was not prepared to be with someone as outspoken as I.
In all three circumstances I am left with one question… Am I enjoying myself and is it something worth continuing? I would have to say yes, it is. I have thoroughly enjoyed getting to know myself through this experience. However, I shall protect myself in the future. Leaving less of myself in the conversation and simply enjoying the experience itself.
As elusive as rules can be it is clear to me that there is a distinct line of what is accepted and what is not in the world of dating interactions. Uncertain that I will find what it may be that I am looking for- I have forgotten myself in the past and shall not do so again. This experiment is ultimately about my happiness and clarity of self. Listening to my inner intuition and regaining control of my life, I feel as though this has been a successful beginning of a new age. Looking forward to the future and cheering on the new year as I reign in my own realm.
Until we meet again, A Goddess of Knite
1 note · View note
kendrixtermina · 2 years
Text
The Shadow Elements of the Types
Welcome to Today’s episode of ‚I read & extract useful stuff from enneagram literature so you don‘t have to’.
The Shadow, in the jungian sense, consists of attributes and perceptions that are unwanted & disallowed and hence not fully allowed into awareness, perhaps because it is perceived as somehow dangerous.
This can happen by just not registering it (denial) or explaining it away when it is very noticeable (distortions) – like it wasn’t even reflected in your eyes.
Generally we think of the shadow as containing hidden fears or flaws or aggressions, but for some of the types it can take a rather different form.
1
- any sort of ambiguity, uncertainty or doubt (since the ) feels compelled to imediately ‚sort‘ all inputs
- anger (there was this impressive anecdote of a guy who watched other children playing while he was stuck inside cleaning and before he knew it he’d pulled the courtain of its hinges)
- their own harshness (probably doesn’t register because they’re just as harsh on themselves or the need to appear well-intentioned)
- what’s going right in a given situation – since they’re focussed on the flaws.
2
- ambition – often present but disowned as ‚selfish‘.
- the benefits of boundaries & independence, as well as worth independent from others (since they’ve essentially cut off/ renounced the function of independent action/strenght) – hence they may legit no understand why others want more space & experience fluctuating self-worth dependin on wether others are responding positively or not.
- their expectations of reciprocity – may legit not be noticed until they suddenly feel slighted
- whatever emotions, preferences and opinions the person in front of you don’t like are temporarily tuned out – especially anger.
3
- whichever feelings, opinions and preferences are incongruous with the persona that is currently being embodied are temporarily tuned out.
- inacceptable experiences of insecurity, loss or failure are sometimes staved off by burying oneself in work & activity
4
- good traits of oneself, others or situations – focus is on negative data. So, kind of the reverse of a regular shadow in a sense
- sometimes belief in one own’s lack of loveability can cause them to disregard signs that they’re genuinely loved or accepted, leading to blocks & conflict – you start to think there must be an ulterior motive, that they don’t know the real you (that would invariably repulse them), or that there must be something wrong with them if they like you
5
- there is a tedency to err on the side of underestimating one’s ressources, so you might be able to handle just a little bit more exertion, excitation or interaction than you think you can
(Personally, I found that I was able to accustom myself to taking daily walks around the block and sharing a flat with a partner. The first months of either endeavor were purely godawful with no redeeming features and I was constantly tempted to quit, but I did eventually adapt to the point that I was able to be baseline ok with it & find joy in it.)
- one’s capabilities and skill (it never feels quite enough)
- unwanted or unacknowledged desire for connection
(at which point you’re probably thinking, ‚and your hidden potential is… clingyness? What a con. Do not Want.‘ - and honestly, same,  but it’s actually something a little more complex that also mentioned in the OG Naranjo texts – for example you might feel that ‚X person probably wants XYZ from me‘ but if the person hasn’t actually done very much to suggest it, you might actually be picking up some latent urge of your own. This needn’t be a gotcha, after all you don’t have to act on it just because it’s there, but it may be helpful to own that shit, & subtract that layer from your perception to more correctly assess the situation without such bias.
To give an example, the afore mentioned live-in partner liked to walk around & sleep in the nude in the summer, & I’d find myself thinking ‚Is he gonna want to screw at any moment now? I need to concentrate!‘. But he hadn’t said anything & had in fact asked my permission to ditch his sweaty clothes. In hindsight, the truth was probably that I found myself distracted by an attractive naked man, because after all I wanted to be working undistracted & minding or even reacting to his preference in any way would have clashed with my view of myself as open-minded, undemanding and unconventional.)
6
-  awareness of past successess – focus is on negative data
- ones own capacity, competency and influence (which is threatening because what if it goes to your head and you mess up?)
- impulses and instinct (the base animal nature in self and others is feared & mistrusted – however, this means its unavailable for quick decision making)
- feelings, especially relating to an inner sense of ‚badness‘. Depending on how self-aware the person is they might oscillate between seeing themselves as the only sane man & terrible self-judgement, or arrive at a fairly integrated middle point of ‚I‘m a flawed regular human’
- whatever you didn’t pull out of the grab-a-bag of 6 traits. If you’re very aggressive, you might have latent fear; If you’re very fearful, you might have latent aggression. Likewise, if you are very certain you might have latent doubt, and if you’re very sceptical your desire to belong might be off the radar.
7
- pain and fear – there’s a tendency to read it as boredom or restlessness
- the value of negative emotions such as creating a sense of meaning & catharsis or serving as a warning
- your actual capacity for seriousness and resillience
8
- generally remarkably unrepressed – self-interested motivations are completely owned, for example. However, there are still some blindspots, such as:
- weaknesses and limitations
- contrary information to their viewpoints or evidence of failure
- the impact of their actions
- reasons for their excesses, such as hurt feelings
9
- aggression – there can be a delayed reaction with this
- opinions, desires and feelings can take some effort to locate, especially if they could cause division in the current situation
- need & desire for change (because this would require rocking the boat)
- accomplishments and desire for recognition
0 notes
Text
Love Conquers All
Zuko x Male Reader
Word Count: 1856
-------------
Y/n could understand where Zuko was coming from, but he knew he wouldn't be surprised if it didn't go as well as he had perhaps envisioned.
It was all very well and good that he had finally found his way, but he had hurt the Avatars group a fair bit before finding his way. Y/n also knew that as someone who had been a part of Zuko's attempts to hurt them, he had no leg to stand on in helping smooth the situation over. He hadn't been as single-minded in his focus on capturing the Avatar, but he had only cared because Zuko cared.
He didn't think that would matter to them, but then, Y/n didn't particularly care one way or the other how they felt about him. The only person who mattered to him was Zuko. Well, and Iroh, but that was a given of anyone who had met the calm old man.
When they made it to the kids campsite Y/n hung back, staying by the exit. It wasn't that he didn't trust them not to ambush him and Zuko, oh wait, it was that. Never mind.
Y/n watched the exchange carefully. He could feel it in the air mere seconds before she struck.
Faster than their eyes could follow, Y/n moved. By the time that everyone had caught up with the events, Y/n was standing in front of Zuko, sheathing his sword after having deflected Katara's water whip.
Silence reigned for a single heartbeat. Then Katara shrieked in outrage.
"How dare you!"
Y/n was sure she was still speaking, but he had a habit of being selectively deaf when it most benefited him.
And then, with almost no warning she was throwing water at him with increasingly wild movements.
It was no match for Y/n's technique.
It wasn't common knowledge, in fact, he had hidden it for most of his life, but Y/n was an airbender.
Yeah, literally the biggest lie in their world was that there were no more airbenders. The Air Nomads had had the practice of removing non-benders from their society and giving them to the other kingdoms.
What they didn't know was that all it took was for the right circumstances to happen and suddenly you had airbenders in the descendants of those non-benders.
It didn't change much ultimately, they were so few that they wouldn't ever be considered a threat to anyone, not that the Air Nomads had been when the Fire Nation had attacked them a hundred years ago.
What it all came down to, was a confused child suddenly developing powers that no one was able to control anymore.
Luckily for Y/n, the only person who had been around the first time he had bended was Zuko. As secrets tend to do, it had bound the two closer together than anyone would have thought ever since that day.
It was a loyalty that had seen Y/n stowing away on the ship Zuko had been banished on, and one that had been returned by Zuko had never once considered that the apparently Fire Nation child could be the reborn Avatar.
What it came down to, was that Katara was having no luck besting Y/n. Much as he wanted to put her in her place properly, Y/n knew that what they were trying to accomplish here would be hurt by that. From the looks of things though, they might have lost that chance.
Y/n stayed on the defensive, letting her tire herself out instead of outright attacking. He was worried about the look the Avatar was giving him though. That wide eyed expression couldn't mean anything good for his secret. He had always known that it would come out eventually, but he had hoped it would last longer than this dammit!
"Katara stop!"
The kid was trying to get in between then now, but the water tribe girl was apparently past the point of caring. She was just not backing down.
"Wait, I wanna talk to him!"
"No! They need to get out of here and never come back!"
Y/n was sure that her words might have been more intimidating if she weren't so clearly out of her league. He decided to ignore the voice in the back of his head that whispered that if he had used even half of his abilities properly before this they might have caught the Avatar long ago.
The element of surprise couldn't be taken for granted after all, and judging from the kid's reaction just now, all they would have had to do was show him Y/n's powers and he probably would have stayed on the ship that first day.
Y/n pulled himself out of his thoughts with a shrug. It was a bit late for that right now.
The Avatar had managed to get between Y/n and Katara, and seemed to be trying to talk her down from her rage. Y/n watched, only mildly interested. This wasn't how he had thought today would go.
He turned to Zuko, who was still standing behind him.
"Are you okay?"
He just looked Y/n over, head to toe looking for injuries.
"I'm fine, but are you sure it was a good idea to show them that? I could have taken a few hits. I've had worse before, you know that."
Y/n clenched his jaw at the reminder.
"I know. I'm sorry. You know how I feel about you willingly putting yourself in danger though. You didn't even try to defend yourself. Don't think I didn't spot that."
Y/n leveled a flat stare at Zuko.
He at least had the good grace to blush in shame and hide behind his fringe.
Y/n turned back to the group of kids gathered in front of them.
He gave them his best blank stare. He had nothing more to say to them, this was about Zuko teaching the Avatar firebending after all.
Besides, he was sure that anything he said would be twisted around and spat back at him by the water tribe girl.
"You're an airbender!"
Y/n refused to give up his secret that easily.
"I don't know what you're talking about."
The little blind girl perked up.
"You're lying. You are an airbender? I thought they were all wiped out."
Y/n stubbornly refused to respond. He could see the water tribe girl's eye narrow at his silence. She was just about to explode on him again when Y/n felt a shift in the air. Less than a second later he felt Zuko's hand on his shoulder.
He slumped slightly. Damn Zuko's soft heart.
"Yes. I can bend air."
The shout of pure joy that the Avatar let out was enough to make Y/n feel slightly guilty about keeping it from him the whole time he had been after him.
"I'm not alone! There must be more, right? Some of the monks survived and hid right? Please tell me!"
Man, this kid was excitable, and as happy as he was, Y/n didn't want to be the one to tell him that he was wrong. He couldn't take the soft option of letting Zuko tell him though, they would probably turn on the both of them and Zuko wouldn't be able to fulfill his destiny.
"No."
"No you're not going to tell him?"
That girl was really starting to get on Y/n's nerves.
"No, they didn't survive."
That shut her up.
It also made the kid tear up, but there was no point building a lie just to make him feel better in this moment. That would be more cruel than the truth.
"The only reason that I exist right now is because of your ancestors though. Your people had a practice of testing their babies for airbending potential."
The Avatar was nodding along. Good, this wouldn't be a surprise to him.
"Well, when they showed to be non-benders your people gave them away. They were sent off to the other kingdoms, not welcome in, nor considered to be, a part of the Air Nomads."
"Air Nomads are airbenders, so if they aren't airbenders they aren't Air Nomads. That's just the way things are."
Y/n grit his teeth. It was an old hurt, but it still stung. He pulled in a deep breath and the only thing that stopped him from screaming about the injustice of it all was Zuko's hand that was still on his shoulder lending him the strength to continue.
"Your people were wrong. Occasionally their methods would be wrong, and they would let a bender slip away into another kingdom. But more than that, its in our blood, in the thing that makes us who we are. When enough of your ancestors were born from the Air Nomads, no matter whether they could bend themselves or not, you have the possibility to end up as a bender."
The Avatar's jaw was hanging open as he stared in horror at Y/n.
"But, they couldn't possibly have known that! If they had, maybe they wouldn't have done what they did."
Y/n's eyes shone with a dark light. This was something he would ultimately have to give up, but it was worth planting the seed if he could.
"So your saying that the only possible use non-benders have is the possibility of benders being born from them?"
The Avatar stopped cold and stared at Y/n in horror.
"What? No! Of course not!"
"Then what? You had no problem with the idea that they would be thrown away like yesterday's garbage up until now. The only thing that's changed is this piece of information."
Y/n pulled back as he saw the tears form in the Avatar's eyes.
"Think on that for a while. You have a non-bender in your group. Do you consider him to be useless?"
The kids all looked like they had been hit over the head.
Y/n was sure that this would be the end of their interaction for the day.
"We'll come back tomorrow. Maybe then we can talk without resorting to violence."
He turned back to Katara who looked like she was getting ready to unleash whatever thoughts had been happening in that head of hers.
"Before you put your foot in it, consider this. We have two things you want. One you desperately need, the other, something you desperately want. Have a good night."
Zuko turned and walked back the way they had come, with Y/n bringing up the rear. He didn't trust them not to attack them from behind.
Y/n hoped that with the reminder that they needed Zuko to teach the Avatar firebending, they would be more open to meeting the next day. If that weren't enough, then there was the added bonus of Y/n being the only other airbender that they knew. He was sure that the Avatar wouldn't be able to resist the pull to be around someone who was like him for long.
Either way, they still had a long way to go to convince them that they didn't want to hurt them and that this wasn't a trap.
'Oh well,' Y/n thought as he lay sleepily beside their fire, 'things always look better in the morning.'
420 notes · View notes
thebeautyoffanfics · 3 years
Note
TBHK boys get break up pranked by reader ?angst to fluff please!!😢👉👈
kou minamoto x gn!reader, teru minamoto x gn!reader, akane aoi x gn!reader, tsuchigomori x gn!reader, hanako x gn!reader, tsukasa yugi x gn!reader, mitsuba sousuke x gn!reader
a/n: heck yea, we love angst to fluff!!!! Thank you so much for requesting <33 (also, by tbhk boys, i just kinda,,, threw my favorites, and some characters that seem to be requested fairly often in there! If i missed anyone you particularly wanted to see, feel free to let me know, and i’ll gladly add them <3)
Also, I’m sorry that these are so short,,;; i’m not entirely sure how to lengthen them;;;; and I’m not sure how well they fit into angst to fluff,,,, i’m really sorry;;;
warnings: none <3
word count: 1,939
Kou Minamoto <3
“Kou, I… I’m sorry, I don’t think it’s going to work between us. I think we should break up.”
Please, don’t make me describe his face… please, don’t do this to me… my heart, my heart hurts just thinking about it. But- his heart hurts worse.
His eyes will widen, but they won’t be filled with the usual sparkle of joy he gets when looking at you. His usual smile and blush will quickly drain from his face, as he narrows his eyebrows in confusion.
“H… huh-?”
“You heard me, Kou. Don’t make me say it again.”
He does his best not to cry on the spot, and you’ll instantly start to feel guilty. You try not to let the guilt get under your skin just yet- it’s a prank. You know it’s a prank, but Kou doesn’t.
“Why? What- what did I do?”
“It’s nothing you did, Kou. We just… can’t work out. Really, it isn’t you.”
His mouth forms a straight line, slightly panicking, but he’ll nod. That… makes sense. No- no, it really doesn’t- not for your relationship. You seemed happy, didn’t you? Did he say something? Did he hurt you? What happened-??
“No, wait, Kou, no- don’t cry, don’t cry-”
“I’m not! No worries, (Y/N), it’s fine, I’ll-”
“It’s a prank, Kou! Please, don’t cry-”
He’d pause, blinking a bit, then tilting his head slightly- confusion written all over his face.
It settled in for a moment, as you hugged him, Kou hugging back instantly. Once it clicked, he was instantly relieved, tightening the hug a bit and huffing.
“You scared me, (Y/N)... I wasn’t crying though. But you did scare me- please, don’t do that again.”
“I’m sorry, Kou, I’m sorry. I won’t do it again, I promise!”
Teru Minamoto <3
“I’m sorry, Teru, but I don’t think things can work between us anymore. It’s not you, I just… think we should see other people.”
He’ll raise his eyebrows, then narrow them, confusion evident on his face, much like his brother reacted. He wouldn’t lose his cool- he wouldn’t get emotional. However, he did feel his heart aching.
“Ah… alright. I’m sorry if I did anything, (Y/N). Is there any way we could make things work? Talk to me.”
“You didn’t do anything, Teru. I just- I just don’t think it can work. Sorry.”
Teru bit his lip a bit, nodding. He turned, planning to walk away, but-
But you wouldn’t let him walk away :)) so, you grabbed his wrist.
He’d turn around, offering you a confused expression, the hurt still evident on his face. Honestly, he really needed to get home to sort out his emotions. “If you would, please, let go, (Y/N).”
“Sorry, sorry, Teru! Can’t do that!” You chirped, tugging him a bit so he’d face you.
Our boy is so confused- why are you suddenly in a better mood??
OH-
“It was a prank!” You declared, tossing your hands up, “don’t be mad, please!”
Teru sighed, placing a hand on his chest. “Oh, thank goodness, (Y/N). I was so scared… of course, I wasn’t about to let you go that easily, but, still-”
He pulled you into a hug, resting his head on top of yours. Expect a slightly more affectionate Teru- he’s gonna be a tad bit paranoid now. No way is anyone gonna take you from him >:((
Akane Aoi <3
“Akane, I think we should… break up.”
Panic. Instant panic. You can see the panic on his face immediately, as his eyes widen.
No, no way. This couldn’t be happening to him- years of pining after Aoi, only to have you introduced into his life. You were someone he loved as dearly as he did Aoi. Someone who returned his feelings.
Having you love him was the best feeling ever… this, on the other hand, was anything but nice.
“Break up-? Why??”
He’ll reach for your arms, heart breaking when you stepped back, looking away from him. To him, you were looking away because you felt bad for having to split up. In reality, you were looking away to avoid the guilt slowly bubbling up in your stomach. It’s a prank- that’s what you had to tell yourself. In just a few moments you could hug him and smother his precious face in kisses.
“Because… you’re,” You stepped forward, booping his nose, “too cute!”
“........(Y/N), I promise you, if this is a prank-”
“It’s a prank~!”
Akane groaned, rolling his eyes, but placing his head against your shoulder. “(Y/NNNNN), honestlyyyyy.”
You patted his back, then wrapped your arms around him, kissing the side of his face gently. “I’m sorry, Akaneeee...”
“You’re fine…” He responded, wrapping his arms around you. He may sulk just a tiny bit, but he won’t be like that for long. By the next day, he’ll be acting normal- though he may use that prank against you lightheartedly.
Tsuchigomori <3
“Tsuchigomori… I’m sorry, but I think we should see other people,” You spoke. Goodness knows you had to put all of your acting skills into this one, since Tsuchigomori could see through lies easier than anyone else you knew.
“You’re lying.”
“I’m not.” “(Y/N), you literally cannot keep secrets from me. Lying is no different. What kind of prank is this? A trend?”
You sighed, running a hand through your hair- your reaction brought a grin to your spider-like boyfriend’s face.
“For what it’s worth, I’m sure I would have been fairly hurt if you were being genuine, so… don’t bother with jokes like that.”
(Actually, there was a part of him concerned that you were being honest. But! He trusted his instincts, praying that you were just joking. He had never been happier to tell truth from lies.)
Hanako <3
“Hanako… I’m sorry, I don’t think things will work between us. We should break up.”
“Hah?”
A million thoughts run through his mind, despite his somewhat unreadable expression. Was it because he was dead? Of course- he knew it would happen. Who would be willing to date a ghost? A murderer at that. He was unlovable. He knew it.
“...I understand, (Y/N), but… don’t play with my heart like that.”
“I’m not playing around, Hanako. Stop taking everything like it’s a joke.”
Hanako shrugged, ignoring how his heart ached. “I think the joke is you not considering things like the obvious before you accepted my confession. Dating a supernatural is clearly not easy, and you walked into this knowing that.”
This time, you were the one with an unreadable expression. What… did he mean? Was he scolding you? Or… rejecting your rejection-?
“What do you mean?” You sighed, faking annoyance as you placed a hand on your hip.
“I mean, you got yourself into this relationship, so you should be willing to stick with it until the end~. I get it though, so, if you really didn’t think that far, then so be it-”
“Fine, I give in.”
Hanako raised his eyebrows, holding a hand to his mouth, curious as to what you were about to say. Did he really just uno reverse your break up?
“It was aaaaaa prank,” You added, pulling your lower eyelid down and sticking your tongue out. It was impressive- you almost seemed similar to him! Impressive indeed!
Hanako grinned, the pain on his heart being suddenly lifted as he basically tackled you into a hug. Kisses were placed against your cheek, before he nuzzled the side of his face into yours.
“I knew you couldn’t do me like that, (Y/NNNN)~.”
Did he really know that? Of course not. And that fear would never leave him, worrying that he would one day not be enough for you. But! For now, the two of you were together, happy in the relationship you were in. That was enough for him <3
Tsukasa Yugi <3
“We should break up, Tsukasa. I’m really sorry, it just… can’t work.”
Won’t let you break up with him. He won’t- he genuinely won’t.
Clings to you, pouting up at you, as you look down at him, feigning sadness.
“I’m sorry, Tsukasa- please, let go of me.”
“Nope! You’re mine, (Y/N). You can’t break up with me!! You’re mine- forever and ever, no matter what!”
(His expression was wide-eyed and somewhat innocent, but thinking about his words… they were certainly questionable.)
You tried to play along a bit more. Telling him you were serious, attempting to push him away. But, that was to no avail. Tsukasa wasn’t giving in, so you eventually had to-
“Alright, alright. It was a prank, Tsukasa… though I guess it didn’t get far with you.”
“Haha! Nope! And you won’t get far either <3”
“Huh?”
“Hm?”
Honestly? Who knows what that meant. You didn’t get it, and you couldn’t be sure Tsukasa understood either. All he knew was he loved you- therefore, he wouldn’t let you do something so silly like break up with him! Like Tsuchigomori, he's virtually impossible to break-up prank- like Hanako, he's virtually impossible to actually break up with.
Mitsuba Sousuke <3
“I… I think we should break up, Mitsuba. It’s not you, really-”
“Tch. Of course it isn’t me, idiot,” Mitsuba interrupted. He wasn’t there to listen to the extent of your acting skills (though he didn’t realize you were acting). “If you’re gonna split up with me, just get it over with. We should break up? Fine. Not like a pervert like you deserves someone as cute and pure as me anyway.”
Despite his words and furrowed eyebrows, his eyes alone showed how heartbroken he felt. His lower lip trembled a bit, though he attempted to stop it by pouting. No, he wouldn’t be the one crying in this situation! Not yet, at least-
“Great then. I’m glad we’re on the same page.” You retorted, laughing bitterly. Ahh, no, this was getting too real for him- you were serious, weren’t you? Could this be a joke?
Mmh, who cared? Mitsuba was here to defend himself, even if it was at the cost of your feelings. If you were going to hurt his heart like that, then he’d do his best to take a jab at yours- or at least your ego.
“Great. Then, why are you lingering? Getting a last look at my cute face?”
“Hm… yeah-”
“Pervert.”
“Excuse mE, let me finish,” You sighed, ruffling his hair lightly, “surprise! It’s a prank!”
His face was honestly golden- his reaction to hearing that it was a prank even better than his reaction when the prank was in action. Eyebrows furrowed in confusion, though watering just barely from the previous aching in his heart, mouth agape slightly.
Then, his eyebrows furrowed deeper, displaying anger. The way his shoulders sank for a moment showed his relief, though they tensed up quickly, as he prepared himself to yell at you. “Idiot! Pervert! Who do you think you are, trying to play with my heart like that?! What right do you have to-”
You cut him off by cupping his face, pouting slightly- his face burned as he avoided eye contact, hand raised slightly as if contemplating pushing you away. It was clear he didn’t really want you to stop though.
“Sorry, sorry~. I just wanted to get a reaction out of you, Mitsuba. You’ve got very cute reactions, you know?”
“Hmph. You sound like you’re quoting porn-”
“Mention porn one more time and the prank won’t be a prank anymore-”
“Liar. Idiot. Stupid pervert, you’re a liar.”
You laughed lightly, squishing his face as you closed your eyes. “Maybe I’m a tad bit of a liar. But, when you pretend to not be upset, I’m sure you’re lying as well~.”
“Hah. I don’t lie.”
441 notes · View notes
lipstickstainz · 3 years
Text
true lies - s. r. (1/15)
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader
Series Summary: Spencer is furious, when you rejoin the team after a year and after you left him, when he got arrested. Little does he know, that you leaving him was the only option to ever get him out of prison.
Chapter Summary: Spencer and you have your first encounter, after you left him a year ago. Spoiler: it doesn’t go well. 
Warnings: angst, secrets, swearing I think, typical criminal minds stuff
Word Count: 2.6k
A/N: tadaaaaa. it’s finally here! my first series! tell me if you liked it! love you! gif not mine.
Series Masterlist
Tumblr media
The first thing you notice is the complete silence that takes over the room. The last time you had been here, it had been crowded and so noisy that you could hardly understand your own words. People had been everywhere, talking or exchanging theories, but your gaze was fixed on the desk overflowing with books. Now there are only files, carefully sorted and stacked on top of each other.The office is empty, no agents, no witnesses.  No one. You take a deep breath.
It's been some time since you've been here. Almost a year, but everything in this building is all too familiar to you. The coffee maker just waiting to be used in the kitchen. The law books gathering dust on a shelf. It feels like you've never been away.
"Y/N," a woman's voice snaps you out of your thoughts. You have to tear your gaze away from the desk in front of you, and your eyes find a tired, yet incredibly good-looking Emily Prentiss standing outside her office door, smiling at you like you just saw each other yesterday.
"It's good to see you," you say, and she wraps you in her arms after she closes the office door behind you. It feels good to finally have her by your side again; after all, you had been best friends before you left. You hug her one last time before carefully pulling away from her and sitting down in the chair in front of her desk.
"It's good to see you, too," she replies, dropping into her chair. She places her hands on the desk and interlaces her fingers. "Of course, I'd love to know how you've been this past year, but I'm afraid that will have to wait." She opens a drawer to her right and reaches for a file-your personnel file, you realize-and lays it open in front of her. "I've been informed that my request has been approved and you'll be rejoining our team," she says, smiling briefly at you. "It took a favor, but you're well worth it to me."
Your stomach tightens at the thought of Emily owing someone. You swallow the sour feeling spreading down your throat and nod at her. "Thank you, Emily."
She tilts her head and her gaze slides from your face to your kneading hands. "You're not happy with this, it seems. What's wrong?" Emily doesn't need to profile you to know something is bothering you. She knows you too well to miss the change in your behavior.
"I don't know if this is a good idea," you confess.
"And why is that?" asks Emily, but she already knows the answer. She knows what happened a year ago, and she certainly knows more than you do, because she had been here for the last year, after all. Before you can answer her, the door opens and a colorful person comes in.
"Good morning, my beautiful and strong boss," the one and only Penelope Garcia speaks without looking up from her iPad. "We have a new case that I would like to discuss with you before the whole team arrives. It's about -" When Emily doesn't answer her, she looks up and her gaze immediately lingers on you. You're surprised she doesn't drop the tablet on the floor as she rushes toward you to yank you out of the chair and into her arms. "Y/N! What a relief for my tired brain to see your beautiful face! Am I dreaming?" She breaks away from you and gives Emily a look. "Please tell me I'm not dreaming. I couldn't take it."
A smile spreads across Emily's face. "You're not dreaming, Pen. Y/N is actually back."
"Oh, how wonderful!" she squeals, pushing her glasses back up with her index finger. While she says something else to Emily, you look at her. She really hasn't changed in the last year. She's still the colorful bird of the BAU, and that's a good thing.
You notice yourself starting to smile, but then she utters the thing that erases the smile from your lips. "How's Reid doing? Have you guys talked yet?"
Emily makes a hand gesture for Penelope to drop the subject, but your expression has instantly changed when she said his name. It stabs you in the heart and cold shivers run down your spine, and only with difficulty can you suppress the tremors that want to overtake your body.
"I'm afraid the team is already here," Emily interrupts the silence and casts a glance out the window into the open-plan office. Even if you want to follow her gaze, you don't dare and your body is still in rigidity. She gets up from her chair and walks towards the door, but before she opens it, she turns to you once more. "If you need more time, that's fine. Take all the time you need. But your place is here with us, Y/N. We're your family." And with that, she and Penelope leave the office.
She's right. The BAU is your family - even if you hadn't seen or spoken to any of the family members in the last year - and walking out now wouldn't change the situation. The circumstances under which you left - had to leave - were anything but normal, and you hope that your decisions would be met with understanding, but you can't count on that. So you tighten your shoulders, push through your back, and follow them into the conference room. Your heart beats up to your neck and your hands sweat as you stop on the doorstep.
Your gaze fixes on the youngest team member, except for you. His brown curls are a little shorter than they were a year ago, and it doesn't take you ten seconds to notice that it's not the Spencer Reid you know sitting at the table. The year had changed him. Your absence had changed him.
Rossi is the first to notice you, which is because he glances over his shoulder. "Who do we have here?" he asks playfully, before rising from his chair and taking you in his arms. But you're only peripherally aware of that. Your concentration is on Spencer, who stares at you unblinkingly before jumping up and storming out of the room. JJ, sitting next to him, reaches for him, but he wriggles out of her grip and he runs past you so fast that it's easy to call it an escape. JJ smiles weakly at you before putting her hand on your arm. She doesn't need to say anything, her look tells you that she's glad you're back, but you're also aware that she wants to take care of Spencer, so you nod at her and wordlessly she follows the genius of the team.
The rest greet you with great joy, Rossi presses a kiss on your cheek and Alvez puts his arm around your shoulders, but you look out the window and see Spencer and JJ talking. His face is red and even though you can't hear his words or read his lips, you know exactly what it's about. The blonde tries to calm him down, wanting to put her hands on his shoulders to make him stop shaking, but he avoids her and takes a step back. The gesture is enough, as she drops her arms and doesn't follow him either when Spencer leaves the bullpen. You know he won't be back in the next few minutes.
Garcia tells you about the case and you try to focus on her words as best you can, but again and again your mind wanders to Spencer. His reaction to your return is understandable and you don't judge him for it. You have no right to do so; after all, you are responsible for his condition. You hope that soon there would be a quiet moment when you could talk about the past, but you are not optimistic. He pushed JJ away from him a few minutes ago, which is definitely not a good sign. You try to push the thoughts of him to the back of your mind; after all, there's a case to solve, and although the current situation isn't ideal, you're looking forward to it. It's been a long time since you've worked properly.
"All right," Emily says, snapping you out of your thoughts. "Wheels up in thirty."
"Hey," JJ addresses you as you freshen up in the ladies' room. You glance at her in the mirror and she smiles at you. "Are you okay?" You both know this question is purely rhetorical. She is, after all, Spencer's best friend. Aside from the two of you, she probably knows best what's been going on, but still not everything.
You turn around and lean against the edge of the sink. "I'm trying to get used to everything," you reply, pursing your lips into a thin line. "It's changed quite a bit while I was gone."
She nods. "Yeah, it did." She takes another step toward you. "Look, you have to give him some time, all right? This year hasn't been very nice to him. I hope you can understand that." She sounds sincere and, above all, concerned, which is why you don't resent her little speech. Of course, you're already aware of all this, but hearing it from her confirms your suspicions.
You are to blame for Spencer's condition. And there's no way you can straighten things out anytime soon.
Spencer rejoins the team only on the plane, but he avoids your proximity or your glances at all costs. He takes the seat next to Alvez, which is almost at the other end of the plane, and he is completely silent. The others, of course, notice the tension that has spread through the group since your arrival, but they all have the decency not to bring it up. But by their manner they let you know that they don't stand between you. You had been gone a long time, and they know halfway what had been going on, but they didn't take sides, and for that you are infinitely grateful.
"Alvez, JJ, Simmons. You guys talk to the families. Find out if the victims share any common traits that might connect them," Emily says, dividing the team into focus groups as usual. She glances around the group. "Rossi, Reid, Y/L/N, you go to the coroner's office while -"
"No." It's the first word Spencer has uttered since you boarded the plane. You expected his voice to be weak or to reveal any other signs of uncertainty, but the word came from his lips in a firm tone, leaving no room for discussion. Spencer looks up from the paper file and before he looks at Emily, his gaze brushes yours and at the coldness in his eyes, your blood freezes in your veins.
"All right," Emily says without elaborating. "Alvez, you switch places with Reid. Tara and I will go to the local police department and talk to the detectives. Let's catch the killer."
To say the mood on the plane hit rock bottom would be an understatement.
Forensics helps you out a bit. The victims were drugged before they died, causing hallucinations, which is probably why they self-inflicted injuries. Also, both victims have the same cut wounds in the same place. Definitely not a coincidence. Alvez has Garcia dig up some information on the way to the police station, which is why you could briefly organize your thoughts, but Rossi tells you about a new dish he'd like to cook for you sometime, and you'd been gone too long to block out your work dad. Besides, your mind would only be on Spencer and that's not moving you forward either.
"According to the relatives, none of the victims were unpopular, loners, or even depressed," JJ begins as the team gathers. You take a seat in the chair facing Spencer. When he notices, he gets up and sits somewhere else. The main thing is to get out of your sight. You sigh imperceptibly, but Luke turns in your direction and raises an eyebrow. You shake your head.
It hurts that Spencer doesn't want to be near you. In fact, it almost breaks your heart, but you can get used to that. He should go ahead and hate you. You could handle that.
The day flies by and when the team checks into the hotel in the evening, Spencer grabs one of the keys and leaves without another word. Sadly, you watch him go and Emily puts a hand on your shoulder reassuringly. Eventually, it would get better. Later on, you sit on the bed with her and tell her about the year you've been away, the people you've met, things you've experienced, but each anecdote brings you back to the one topic that makes your heart skip a beat.
"You have to tell him, Y/N," Emily suddenly says seriously, and you shake your head.
"No." It sounds almost as harsh as Spencer on the plane, but there's still some pain hovering in the air with you. "I'm not going to tell him, Emily."
"He thinks you left him because he went to prison. In his mind, you basically left him at the altar," she tries to change your mind, but to no avail. She would not succeed. You had sworn to yourself that this matter would remain a secret, something you would both take to your graves. And you have no intention of breaking that vow. "You were engaged, for gods sake" Emily's tone sharpens. "Don't you think he deserves the truth?"
"I'm not going to tell him. It's for the best."
Emily looks at you incredulously, but also knows she can't change your mind. "Best for whom?"
That night, you lie awake, tossing from side to side but unable to find sleep. You don't feel guilty about what happened. You don't question your decisions you did back then. It was the right thing to do. It bothers you because of Spencer, because of his reaction to your return, because of his hostility. JJ had asked for your understanding and you would do anything to mend fences, but you're not sure that's Spencer's intention either.
After two hours, you get up and slip into sweatpants and a sweater before leaving your room. As if of their own accord, your feet carry you down the hallway, to a destination you shouldn't be going to. As you turn into the hallway where Spencer's room is, you stop, rooted to the spot.
JJ is standing on the doorstep to his room, saying something to him before he leans down and pulls her tightly into his arms. His hair is messy, and even from this distance you can tell Spencer is leaning on JJ with all his weight. You have to swallow. How much you want a hug from him.
JJ is the first to disengage, saying goodbye to him and disappearing in the opposite direction, while Spencer stops and watches her go. There is a small smile on his face and he looks more relaxed than he did earlier in the day. As he turns to go back to his room, his gaze lingers on you. The smile disappears and his body is tense to the breaking point.
Time seems to stand still. It feels like an eternity that you stare at each other without speaking a word, but there is so much coldness in Spencer's eyes, so much pain, that you can hardly stand it and want to look away. But you're transfixed. Your hand raises of its own accord, as if in greeting, and your mouth opens, but before you can say anything, Spencer takes a step back and slams the door behind him. Only then do you realize that you've been holding your breath.
next part
- tags - 
@obsssedwithjustaboutanything // @ashwarren32 // @slytherinbth // @rexorangecouny // @candlemouse // @cloudybau
1K notes · View notes
lupically · 3 years
Text
#FEF5F1 | DILUC RAGNVINDR.
genre | fluff
word count | 1825
warning | none
note | i finally wrote something for my top husbando :’)
Tumblr media
it came to you as a surprise that diluc, at all, sleeps.
there has always been this fantasy version of him in your head, a fantasy that lacked the great ideals and bright adventures most fantasy novels you have read consisted of. in contrast, your fantasy of him was insulting and otherworldly at best—someone restricted to the rules, a personality as plain as a dull purple doormat, a total stick in the mud that kills joy at the mere sight of it, an emotionless robot that has no use for human necessity such as the bathing and sleeping.
does diluc even need to consume food? you have literally never seen him eat or drink anything before. has he ever taken off his gloves to pick up a hamburger—oh, archons, you just realized now that you have never seen the skin of his hands before. he always has gloves on! was it to hide something?
"oh, wow," you exclaimed lowly to yourself as you leaned forward to examine the hands of the very annoyed red-haired man before you. your long-term question was finally answered. "fascinating... so you do have hands!"
diluc spared not even a glance toward the limb you were so interestedly staring at. he kept quiet for a moment and peered down at you from his bed, one leg propped up and the other stretched out—a rather awkward position he had no time to get out of after he almost burned you alive for sneaking into his bedroom in the winery.
"what drunk wind blew your incompetent self here?" he asked, ignoring your remarks about his lack of real and human hands. whatever you meant by that? you were always spilling weird things out of your mouth, you might even be worse than venti, he reckoned. 
you glared up at him after hearing his mindless insult. you were only fifty percent sure (which was already a lot in your book!) diluc never actually meant those hurtful words, that they simply fly out of his mouth due to his weird need to make sure everyone around him knew that he leaves no room for unnecessary sentiment. 
being kind blatantly was not his thing, and he has no intention of being applauded for being a decent person. why that was, you couldn't be sure. you had your assumptions, but kaeya turned out far too different than diluc that you weren’t sure if you should put your finger on the assumption. you also didn't dare dive deeper into it because (a) you just weren’t invested enough, and (b) by then, it would be a family business you would hate to indulge yourself with.
"kaeya dared me to take a picture of your sleeping face in exchange for some wine. our good friend, the honorary knight's smaller friend also wanted it as a possible blackmail souvenir," you told him honestly.
diluc immediately murmured something you couldn't quite hear, but he looked more confused than annoyed when he glared down at the mattress of his bed. he grumbled something along the lines of how the roles were definitely reversed. you didn't press further about that.
"if that is what you came here for, your best bet is to leave the way you came," he said after a moment, pointing a cold hand toward his bedroom window. "you're not taking any pictures of me."
you snorted, holding up your kamera and tapping the lenses. “uh, i think i came pretty close to taking a picture of you sleeping, diluc.”
“i had woken up the second you walked through my bedroom door. you could never,” he said.
you hummed under your breath, eyeing him suspiciously. he was probably telling the truth. he barely struggled in surprise when he grabbed your hands in the dark; was it pure luck that he perfectly found where your kamera was on the first try or does diluc secretly has night vision? your guess was as good as the unknown. 
not to mention, he looked normal, just like someone who may be in the know of your intrusion. he appeared grumpy but that was just his normal state. you could barely get him out of a frown even if you pay him, mainly because he wouldn’t need your money, but also because he was stubbornly against smiling, it appeared. 
"you know, i was surprised at first. i didn't know you sleep at all! i always thought you kind of just shut down, or maybe you have stayed awake all your life," you said with a shrug, and when he deadpanned at you, you defensively waved your kamera around. "i'm sorry! i just–you don't strike me as a person who sleeps!"
"so dead, then?" diluc asked calmly, although there was very little calmness in his facial expressions, especially those judgemental eyes of his.
"not dead! just... not really human–" you paused and pressed your lips together, thinking back to what you said to him and realizing that he might have a point. then you turned to him. "you also eat, right?"
“are you leaving or not?” he asked, a hint of flare in his voice that if you looked closely, you may see fire emerging from his body.
being stubborn as ever, and knowing that diluc would never really hurt anybody he knew to be good people, you feigned thoughtfulness for a second. tapping your finger against your chin, you scrunched your nose and shook your head. setting the kamera lumine forcefully had to borrow you between your crossed legs, you flashed him a mischievous grin. 
“no,” you said. “i am getting that picture out of you!”
“like i said,” he said, “you will never.”
“fine! then i guess i will just have to sit here and wait for you to fall asleep on me,” you said, slapping your hand down on his soft mattress. “don’t try to force me out of here! i will make it way worse for you!”
diluc furrowed his brows, wondering if you meant what you said. when his questioning gaze couldn’t get even an ounce of budge from you, he could only sigh in frustration. if you planned to sit on his bed until he doze off, then you would definitely make it worse if he tries to dump you out of his bedroom through whatever means you could.
he may be a skilled swordsman and a vision bearer, but unfortunately, he was not immune to bullshits from the likes of you.
diluc closed his eyes to savor the tiniest bit of sleep he managed to get before he heard your extra loud footsteps creeping around his room. he was supposed to get a good night's sleep, which was something he hasn't had in a while because of all the business schedules and his side vigilante job.
he was supposed to rest tonight, and there came you.
there always comes you.
dilly-dally, unpredictable, the epitomie of 'knights of favonius... always so inefficient,' letting klee out of solitary confinement and causing a ruckus amongst the responsible adults kind of irresponsible, has paid for his wine at least a zero number of time kind of broke, and was just always here to ruin his mood at the tavern every single day. 
most of the time, diluc thought about you in a negative light, much like he did with everyone around him and the entirety of the knights of favonius. but there was a version of you in his head that painted you as somebody different—somebody respectful, somebody worth keeping around...
somebody he likes, perhaps.
after all, joy was never prevalent in his life. it used to be, but that was a past he has long forgotten the details of. even if he wanted to remember them now, he could only remember snippets that wouldn’t guarantee him a good nostalgia. he may just end up feeling worse at the end. the only constant influx of distraction he has now seemed to be either you or venti, and with the godly bard as his other option, he would much rather choose you. 
but it was not because that venti was too hard to confine in. you were just as hard to talk about problems with considering your optimism and fickle attitude. 
what diluc wanted was permanence; a train that never stops, a bottle of wine that continuously refills, dandelions that do not stop flying even after it reaches celestia. and venti was too understanding and abstract to be one. as interesting of a character he may be, venti knew when to leave people alone. or, occasionally, he just cared too little. after all the city of mondstadt didn’t lack a god because he was responsible. 
you, though. diluc could never pinpoint if you were as dense as you appeared to be, or if you did know how to read the room and simply chose to ignore it, but you never leave people alone. you never left him alone; you unknowingly pick a petty one-sided argument with him all the time, you get drunk at the tavern and somehow has never let anybody take you home but him, you barge into his bedroom in the middle of the night because of some stupid dare his brother made you do and you still refuse to leave despite being sleepy.
you give him a way out, whether he likes it or not.
arms crossed in front of his chest, he deadpanned as he watched your head drop lower and lower to the mattress. soon enough, you were snoring away on his bed with the gadget discarded by your feet. he watched you in silence, your cheek smushed against the surface and the intensity you always radiated lessening from your body. you looked normal now; not energetic, not talkative. just sleeping peacefully, the way he always made sure you were after carrying you home. 
diluc’s heart was finally softening under the knowledge that nobody was watching him anymore. the pessimistic monster that often emerges from him was still here, but in the face of you, it has painted itself pink and it has forgotten vengeance and retribution. in the face of you, it has been dragged out from the death it once laid and became forgiven. 
carefully laying your head down on the pillow, diluc draped the blanket over your shoulder to tuck you into his bed. after making sure you were fine and well, he placed the kamera on the desk in the room, somewhere visible you could find once you wake up, and he left for one of the guest rooms in the mansion. 
tonight was the first time in a while when he has forgotten about all the problems he’s had. something that wasn’t about wine, the family business, or the abyss order. it wasn’t the rest he wanted, perhaps it was hardly any rest at all, but he was glad he got to think about something else.
of course, diluc would never tell you that.
150 notes · View notes
k3rm1e · 3 years
Note
heyo!! i was wondering if you would mind writing hc’s for a reader who just had a major accomplishment but their parents don’t really congratulate them or anything, and then philza celebrates with them instead and tells reader how proud he is. i kinda want some dadza comfort rn :’) anyway, thank you sm!! have a great day <3
accomplishments
heyo!! i was wondering if you would mind writing hc’s for a reader who just had a major accomplishment but their parents don’t really congratulate them or anything, and then philza celebrates with them instead and tells reader how proud he is. i kinda want some dadza comfort rn :’) anyway, thank you sm!! have a great day <3
hello anon! i’m sorry i took a while to answer this. i went a bit off track with this and got A LOT more angsty, so i’m really sorry about that. If you want me to make a much more fluffier or mellowed-out version, i’d be happy to. please, read the trigger warnings before reading this.
i don’t plan on writing more angst-y things like this, especially not this angsty, so don’t worry. once again, please, if you would like me to rewrite this into a less emotional version i’d be happy to
cw: swearing
tw: talk of god and the church, slight manipulation, repetition of words
accomplishments:
  holy shit. you were in disbelief. a state of shock. one million twitch followers. one. million. followers. you were silent. shock can have many effects on a person. some scream and laugh out of joy, or a misplaced sense of mania. others cry, because they cannot handle it. some remain confused, because their brains are unable to conceptualize the event. you were silent.
  what should you do? would a “thank you” tweet be good enough or would it come off as insincere? should you wait to stream? or would that make people feel you didn’t care because you took so long? through the anxiety you could feel the true realization that you now had one million followers. like a truck, you were hit with the most excited feeling ever. getting up, you jumped around your room. you spun and jumped and cheered and whooped and yelled and smiled and danced and were overflowing with joy, with the acknowledgement that you had done it, you had really fucking done it. 
  opening the window above your desk, without a single fuck, you screamed. “WHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! FUCK YEAH!!!!!!” let’s just hope your neighbors don’t wake up.
  you stayed up all night, celebrating. tweeting out a thank you, you received congratulations from your fans and friends while you talked with the people in your discord vcs.
  in the morning, your mother and father had woken up. with a newfound determination, you ran downstairs. streaming was your passion and you wanted to tell the world what you had done. but, because of limitations, your mother was your metaphorical world.
  “mom! mom! mom! mother, mother, mumther!!” you shouted, dashing down the stairs, tripping over your feet. stupid wood flooring and slidy socks.
  from your place at the bottom of the stairs, you heard her sigh, “yes, sweetie?”
  you bounded over to her, setting your arms on the kitchen counter. from the hallway you could see your dad, who was sitting on the couch drinking his sunday morning coffee. “mom! guess what?” without giving her time to respond, you shouted, “i hit one million follows on twitch! one freaking million!”.
  your mother didn’t seem as enthusiastic as you. “is that why you were causing such a ruckus last night? and, watch your mouth, even though ‘freaking’ isn’t a ‘true’ curse, i don’t want you swearing. especially not on the lord’s day. i couldn’t fathom going to church everyday, only to allow you to have a mouth like that.” she continued to stare at her work papers.
  “oh, uh, okay mother. dad? did you hear me? i hit one million on twitch.” you awkwardly turned your head over to your father.
  “she’s right, you know that, don’t you sweetie?” your father stood up, and made his way into the kitchen. “language like that, it’s shameful. surely, we don’t need you to have a private session with father paulson, do we?” your dad stood next to your mother, rubbing her back as he stared at you.
  “no, no, of course not. um, i’m gonna go upstairs now.” you turned around, wishing you could simply disappear.
  “without breakfast? are you truly that upset with us? we can’t have you ending up like those people, committing sinful acts and going to hell. god would never forgive you. we’re already taking a risk allowing you to stream, putting yourself out there.”
  both your mother and father stared at you. your blood felt like ice in your veins. the white walls of your house seemed so much brighter, yet duller at the same time. everything felt a white-pure-pink-orange. your breathing got uneasy. choppy. in, out, out, in, in, in, out, in, in, out, out for different increments of time. 5, 3, 2, 7, 10, 9, 6, 4, 1, 6, 8, seconds, over and over and over.
  “we just wanna protect you, dear. we love you, don’t you get that?” your mother stared at you.
  you felt like a scene in those movies. the ones that directly cater to teens who thought their lives were shit when in reality they just hadn’t grown up enough to make sense of something yet. were you one of those teens? or is this actually wrong. you don’t think it is, but you don’t talk to others about this. family matters stay in the family was a common phrase repeated in your household. the church was family, they could know. your mother and father, they could know. others, they must not know, never know.
  “of course, mother, father.” you wanted to force yourself to speak, but syllables were incapable of getting past your lips. your mouth was full of peanut butter from the sandwiches served in your elementary school cafeteria. but, the partly frozen chocolate milk always washed it down. “of course. i love you guys too. love you.” you smiled, a disgusting smile that felt violating to exist on your face, violating, violating, violating.
  you dashed up the stairs, to your room, up, up, up. running in, you wanted to slam the door, scream out the window, puch your pillow, smash your pc, cry, whatever you could do to get out your emotions. but instead, you lightly shut your door and slowly walked over to your desk chair to see who was online. you would go live later. it was only 5 AM, after all. they could wait. at least, you hoped they could.
  opening discord, just to see what everyone was doing, you saw philza minecraft was online. you went over and messaged him, ‘phil. philza. philza minecraft. vc please?’ in response, you received a short, ‘sure m8, gimme a minute’ you waited, until you heard the noise confirming he had joined.
  “good morning phil.” your energy from before had receded back into the confines of your chest. the prior excitement was gone and replaced with a feeling of fatigue.
  “morning mate, how are you? congrats on the one mill!” phil sounded excited, happy for you. you smiled, chuckling a bit.
  “i’m alright man, just tired. how are you? and, thanks for the congrats.” you smiled, feeling the fatigue set in.
  “i’m good. but you, you don’t sound very good. couldn’t sleep, could ya’? that was how i was when i hit one mill. way too excited to sleep.”
  “yeah. yeah, i’m just tired.” you were getting a bit too tired to talk. the day had barely started, and yet the full-body emotional exhaustion had set.
  “‘just tired’? the hell happened kid?” phil’s voice sounded concerned. fuck. the last thing you wanted to do was worry him. he had his own life and you had already caused enough trouble today.
  “it’s nothing big phil, seriously. just my parents.” there, a slight bit of information. family matters still within the family, just a few words.
  “they being shitbirds? or are you lying, and something big did happen?” he was being inquisitive, which was dangerous. questions were dangerous.
  “no, why would i lie?” his inquisitiveness would continue, you knew. so you spilled the metaphorical beans. “they just, just weren’t as supportive as i’d wished they were when i told them. i was really psyched, y’know? and them, just sort of, not giving a shit? i don’t know man, it just feels bad.”
  “i get you. it’s shit, when people don’t care about your accomplishments. my parents never really saw streaming as a true profession in the beginning, which led to shit like you describing. i promise it gets better though, even if it feels like shit now. and, for what it’s worth, i’m proud of you.”
  “it’s fine phil, you don’t need to try to make me feel better. i’m okay, seriously.” you didn’t need or want his pity. accepting it would feel patronizing.
  “no, you need to understand that i’m not fucking around. one million is a big fuckin’ thing, especially for you who hasn’t been streaming all that long to achieve. it’s fucking amazing, mate. be proud of yourself, for christ’s sake.” his fake anger chimed through your headphones. even though you were being berated, you still felt better.
  “thank you, phil. i needed that.”
  “your welcome, mate. and look, anytime your parents are being shit, don’t try to hold it all in. call me, or wil, or someone, okay? don’t hold that shit in.”
  you fake sighed, just to piss him off. “okayyyyyy….”
  “good. now, go take a nap or some shit. i love you, kid.”
  “love you too, dadza.” this time, your words didn’t feel forced. the smile on your face wasn’t violating, but an invitation to better times. it would be alright. okay.
370 notes · View notes
kikyan · 3 years
Note
Thank you for all your work! For the Obey Me boys, could I request some hcs for all of them with a Plus Size!Reader?
OMG OFC YOU CAN!! As someone who is also plus size, it’s nice to see that people are requesting this! This leaned a bit more on the insecurities and struggles that we tend to face because you know people always have smth to say and comment even when we didn’t ask for them. Those reminders that pop in last minute because it’s a rough life. Idk, I was just hella depressed a couple days ago because of this but this lowkey cheered me up! 
Tumblr media
Lucifer
He worries a lot and takes on multiple responsibilities, but one of them is to take care of you and remind you how much he loves you for you. If this was based on appearance I can most DEFINITELY assure you that obey me would be a short game with little to no character developments and I stand by that comment. Lucifer was the last one whom we got a contract with but he was one where we fully impressed him and reached out to him.
He cares a lot about you, you helped him see things from a different perspective and relatively are living proof that he did not fail his sister or brothers. He did good, his hard work paid off. He isn't a failure. He'll do the same to you. If you ever felt upset or insecure, he'd remind you of your worth. There is no price because you are priceless. You're his greatest treasure and he loves you.
He'd love and appreciate hugs and cuddles because they feel so comforting. So much to love and so much to hold, you do things to him you know. Anyone dare talk shit or say some mean and rude things? He's on the way to scold them and make them eat those words because here they are, judging one without really knowing them.
Mammon
He'd pull stunts for you to scold him and then cuddle him afterwards because hugs >>>Mammon, being the sweet little tsundere he is and your first will always be around you. He wouldn't treat you any different than he would any other person, but here is a sad headcanon because I enjoy making myself cry. He could care less what others say and think of him, even his own brothers. He won't let anyone say anything bad about you though, not his brother, Lucifer, anyone. He doesn't want you to experience what he does constantly so he would do anything to make it all go away.
Someone spreads a rumor about you? He'd literally risk expulsion by fighting someone over rude comments or risk losing whatever money he has to ensure that those hurtful comments go away. It's sad because it's the 'I rather be hurt than let others be hurt' concept.
It hurts because I have that same concept and while it hurts me so much, it's the pure joy that we get when we see the ones we care about happy. Mammon would sacrifice any and everything to ensure that your life is as peaceful as he could possible make it. He wants you 25/8 around him because he lives off and for you. He loves you so much.
Leviathan
He is on the internet 25/8, he knows how it really is out there and he is the first one to defend anyone against these comments. He also understands what it's liked to be judged for his anime obsession, appearance, and his 'normie' comments. But you won't ever be bullied. While it takes him time to be fully pissed off, he won't hesitate to fight on your behalf and share his wrath with others.
He understands the struggle of not finding anything in your size so he himself, yes this otaku, will take up the amazing job with pride of making you a cute asf cosplay costume. He'll help you realize that you're perfect just the way you are. Also this man will have you near him for cuddle time which is all the time
Satan
Satan, like Lucifer, learned A LOT about himself. Mc taught Satan that he didn't have to be bound by what brought him. Essentially, he may have been born by Lucifer, but he isn't Lucifer at all. He is Satan, he is his own person and should not be tied down by this. He wants to ensure that his S/O understands that too.
He'll remind them that they aren't what people think they are and that they are special. They mean the world to him, like a good book that you can't put down, he will NEVER stop loving you and cherishing you for the entirety of your life.
Would love it if you sat on his lap while he read you a story or read together. He wants to have that moment, that experience of reading together which is cute ngl, but it's hard to have someone read from your side. Get on his lap, he wants you to be on his lap and read with him.
Asmodeus
Your personal hype man. He honestly doesn't care or give a damn what other's think. He'll tell you that you're perfect just the way you are because you are. Those comments? It's the haters and that's all they will be. Asmo doesn't want his S/O to feel insecure so the moment you're down, he'll stop talking about himself and focus on you. He knows what being insecure is, but rather than hiding it he much rather you feel better and feel confident..
The moment you're down, it's all about you. What do YOU want to do? Stay home? Okay, at home spa or simply relaxing. You want to go out? Where? Shopping? A cute pastry place or whatever they have at the devildom, idk.
Beelzebub
Beel is very adorable, please he doesn't overthink things and he is a man of action. All the brother loves you the way you are, but Beel might not understand insecurities at first because he sees nothing wrong and will never understand comments like that. He respects any and all opinions you have about yourself minus the negative ones because he cares a lot about you and it hurts him to hear you be mean to yourself or others to you. If you want to work out or anything, he'll be down to assist and help you. You don't? That's okay because there is no need, it's all about loving yourself and feeling comfortable with yourself.
Beel loves cuddles (who tf doesn't) and would request them constantly, especially when you're sleeping. While some think that Beel is 'dumb' it's because he doesn't tend to think things constantly. He's an outright person who says what they want to say and that's it. What would he say to you? That he loves you <3
Belphegor
We'd make great pillows so you can already tell that Belphie would also tell us that he loves us for who we are and not how we look like. Sure we beautiful and STUNNING, but he loves us a lot more because we are ourselves. He loves the cute stories we say when he's snoozing off on us, the hugs we give him when he wants them.
He hears any negative comments, he would not hesitate to invade someone else dreams and haunt them from within or unleashing hell on them. What do they know about his darling? Nothing, so they should say nothing as well.
260 notes · View notes
sergeanthopeless · 3 years
Text
female Byleth S-supports ranked best to worst
(keeping my personal feelings about the pairings themselves to a minimum)
(Gilbert and Alois omitted, since those are platonic S-supports)
(warning: long post)
1. Seteth 
This S-support is about as romantic as it can get. This thing just makes my heart flutter every. dang. time. and it’s easily the best S-support in the whole game for female Byleth. There’s a REASON why a lot of people hop aboard the Setleth train after witnessing this masterpiece.
Sure, Seteth lectures his way in and out of the proposal, but let’s be real, if it was any different it would be out of character, and acting the responsible advisor is just part of his charm. Plus, he pledges utter devotion to Byleth for the rest of his existence, and we essentially get wedding vows out of this one. It doesn’t get better than that!
He’s so self-assured during this S-support, and that’s sexy. But he is patient and affectionate with her, and takes the time to make sure there’s no room for confusion. He clarifies that his feelings are not those of duty (which is a problem with some other S-supports), or an interest in perpetuating a Nabatean or Crest-rich bloodline. It’s very clear that he just wants her, and that’s it. But where others put Byleth on a pedestal, this S-support feels like an exchange between equals.
Byleth’s reaction to this one is particularly noteworthy — there’s an unusual amount of emotional expression from Byleth during this S-support, INCLUDING A FRIGGIN BLUSH! Byleth does NOT blush often during these supports. Plus, Byleth asks Seteth to promise that he’ll follow wherever she goes. Unlike some of the other S-supports, it’s very clear that she’s invested in him and wants him.
Favorite quotes:
“I cannot conceive of a world without you in it.”
“I love you, deeply. Will you marry me?”
“From this day forward, I will always be at your side. Through good or ill fortune. Through the greatest of joys and the worst of woes. No matter how daunting the task, I will be there.”
“Courage, my love. Let us go forth and face the world - together.”
2. Hubert 
I was genuinely caught off-guard with Hubert, especially since I haven’t played Crimson Flower yet and have gotten all of my impressions of Hubert from the fandom. A pleasant surprise, though, and pleasant enough to snag the #2 best S-support!
He starts with advisor nagging, which is no surprise since that’s his character. However, he doesn’t take too long to get to the point of the conversation, and everything is straightforward yet sweet. It’s very cute how he flustered he gets in the beginning, and his self-consciousness about his suitability as a husband is really sweet. But what really clinched this for me was the privilege of seeing a BLUSHY HUBERT! This surprisingly lovable psychopath gets so dang worked up and excited over Byleth giving him a ring and proposing to him right back.
Favorite quotes:
“[I’d] rather you be with me rather than some dubious individual.” (Yes, I altered the quote, but let’s be real, he wasn’t talking about Edelgard there.)
“I once thought killing you would be a great challenge, but the real difficulty was declaring my love.”
3. Ignatz 
This S-support starts with an angry Ignatz, which had me worried. Ignatz is one of those characters where I expected his apparent youthfulness to cause a problem in his S-support (it definitely causes problems in other S-supports), even though he’s actually 17 at the start of game like Felix, Dimitri, Claude, Raphael, Ferdinand, and Edelgard. So I was pleasantly surprised by the sheer maturity of his proposal!
While he’s definitely self-conscious and doesn’t even expect Byleth to accept his proposal, it says a lot that Ignatz still had the guts to do the proposing. While he expresses surpassing admiration toward Byleth as someone who supported him through troubled times, he’s not dependent or subservient. Yes, there is a prominent fixation on Byleth’s beauty, but he’s an artist, so I think that adds more meaning to what would otherwise be an extremely shallow point to make during an S-support.
Favorite quotes:
“You are my goddess.”
 “You soothed my troubled soul.”
“My beloved goddess.”
“I want to love you for all eternity.”
“I love you with all my soul.”
Hoo boy, this boy’s got a serious SILVER TONGUE on him! *fans self*
4. Lorenz 
Regardless of how you feel about Lorenz, you’ve gotta admit this is a pretty flawless proposal. He reminisces about and apologizes for the trouble he used to cause as a youth, has a smooth transition into the presentation of the ring, and then his composure falls apart when Byleth reveals she’s been wise to him all along. He’s such a perfectionist, and his determination to propose perfectly is very consistent with his character. But I also appreciate that he made sure of Byleth’s feelings before actually asking her to marry him (ring presentation aside).
This S-support makes it very clear just how much Lorenz admires Byleth, which I feel is extremely important in context of his character. He can be incredibly self-centered to the point of being downright irritating, so the fact that he’s now talking about her and is focused entirely on her shows the sincerity of his feelings and how much Lorenz has grown as a person.
The bit at the end where he gets overexcited and uses his full name is hilarious, but I’m glad the S-support doesn’t end there, which would have taken away from it. Instead, it ends with Lorenz swearing to make Byleth happy and work with her in making the world a better place. Equal partners!
The last thing that really made this S-support for me was the voice acting. The broken voice, trembling, and stammering really added emotional depth to Lorenz’s character in this critical moment, and really brought everything to the next level in terms of overall impact.
Favorite quote: “Pedigree and status are no longer priorities for me. I now know that what matters most is the worth of an individual’s soul.”
5. Felix
The moment I noticed that this S-support was taking place at the training grounds, I knew it was going to be good. And it goes exactly as you would expect with our favorite tsundere, flustered and deflecting and all, but the sheer effort that he ends up putting into it is so endearing. And I adore how Byleth messes with him the whole time.
It starts rough, let’s be real. He just hands the ring to Byleth and tells her to “take this.” Oh, Felix. This poor boy is so. friggin. hopeless. You can practically hear his thought process leading up to this point. “How do I make sure Byleth never leaves?... Ah, marriage — yes, that’ll lock her in!” *facepalm*
But Felix’s body language is what really makes this S-support, starting with the finger point and then ending with the kabedon. Plus, we get a glimpse of something very rare: blushy Felix!
Favorite quotes:
“Fight me for the rest of my life.”
“I want you to be my wife. Please say yes. Let’s get married and stay together until we die. I love you.”
6. Balthus
I really didn’t know what to expect with this one, although to be honest, what expectations I did have were fairly low. Yet despite his faults, Balthus managed to scrape together a rather charming S-support! His nervousness and stuttering is adorable for such a big, tough-talking guy, and I love that we actually get an impatient “Just say it already,” from Byleth.
It was nice to see Byleth’s good influence on Balthus, although I’m not a fan of the woman-redeems-man trope. And considering that Balthus asks for up to 5 years to get his act together…that wasn’t exactly a point in his favor.
What made this S-support for me was all of the classic lines. Balthus isn’t necessarily a smooth talker, but it would be wrong to say that he doesn’t know how to talk to a woman. The proposal itself had me ROLLING: “Marry me, pal!” The voice acting was flawless, particularly when he said, “my love.” Balthus, I’ll say this on Byleth’s behalf: please stop trying so hard. And never say that again.
Favorite quotes:
“It’s time to take the biggest gamble of my life.”
“Comfort be damned! I need you by my side. Always.”
“Let’s get hitched right away! I know a guy.”
“To look after you...and be brave enough to let you look after me. that’s what marriage is all about, right?”
S-support portraits shouldn’t really matter here, but I’m going out on a limb here and saying that Balthus’ portrait is the best one of all Byleth’s S-supports.
7. Dorothea
I have a lot of Dorothea feels, okay? She’s my baby girl. And by this point in the game, she’s so jaded and used to disappointment that it just breaks my heart. So when Byleth proposes to her, you can hear the genuine emotion in her voice. She’s so in love with Byleth, but clearly talked herself out of it long before this moment. “You won the war. You could pick anyone in the world. Why would you…?”
And then she’s so happy. It’s not fancy, but her pure happiness really makes this for me. The hopeless romantic finally getting her happy ending is just really lovely.
Favorite quote: “I starred in so many operas where I captured the heart of my beloved. But I never dreamed that it would feel this wonderful when it actually happened.”
8. Ferdinand
Oh boy, Ferdie. There wasn’t much of a preamble, and the presentation of the ring wasn’t anything special. He’s still full of himself: “You hear noble Ferdinand von Aegir declare his love for you, and all you say is, ‘I understand’?” and this S-support is more focused on him than it is on Byleth, which is exactly the opposite of what happened with Lorenz’s S-support, even though they’re similar characters.
That being said, this S-support has its moments. We get a good reaction out of him (even though it’s over the top), and we get a sign of his personal growth when he reins himself in. The trembling and feeling faint is very cute (10/10), and considering his ambitious nature, him saying that he considers winning Byleth’s heart to be one of his greatest accomplishments is sweet, as is the way he dreams about their future.
In other words, this one starts rough, but ends sweet.
Favorite quote: “I need you as much as I need my next breath — more, even.”
9. Dedue
Can we just appreciate that Dedue chose to leave Dimitri for Byleth? That is so meaningful. Dedue spends the entire game unhealthily attached to Dimitri, and finally he finds something that he chooses for himself. Of course, there is the concern that he will become unhealthily attached to Byleth, but I don’t get that impression from his S-support.
There are so many wonderful little details in this S-support. The tiny, modest ring. The straightforward proposal. Both of them gazing at each other in loving, comfortable silence afterward. Byleth’s blush. And DEDUE’S LAUGH. Just. the laugh. It’s important.
Finally, Dedue invites Byleth to come with him to visit Duscur. TAKE NOTES, CLAUDE!! Anyway…
10. Edelgard
*takes a deep breath and sets aside my feelings about Edelgard’s stance on the Children of the Goddess*
Alright, so this S-support is significant because it’s one of the few where you can tell that there is genuine affection on Byleth’s end. She really takes charge of the proposal, going so far as to use Edelgard’s nickname, “El,” to convey affection and intimacy.
At first I was concerned when I heard Edelgard say, “This ring…thank you, my dearest friend,” and I was like HOLD UP – did Byleth just get friendzoned?? But Edelgard clarifies by expressing that she has romantic feelings too, which saves the scene. But while sweet, the rest of the S-support focuses on Edelgard’s ambitions and generally lacks romance. Fitting for her character? Yes. A satisfying S-support? Not really.
11. Dimitri 
It’s clear from the beginning of this S-support that Dimitri and Byleth have become close friends. I appreciate the way they talk about their wounds, and although talking about Dimitri’s nightmares is far darker than I expected from an S-support, it shows just how much Dimitri has improved.
What disappointed me about this S-support is the lack of emotion on both sides. Sure, the “my beloved” pet name is wonderful. And sure, Byleth isn’t very emotional as a rule. But Byleth shows more emotional in other S-supports. And there is not nearly enough of a reaction on Dimitri’s side. Come on, dude. You’ve been aggressively simping over Byleth since Day 1, and you’re just taking this proposal in stride?? You should be unconscious right now.
12. Mercedes
I’m so proud of how far Mercedes has come at this point. She’s determined to live in a way that makes her happy, outside of her Crest or anyone else’s expectations. That being said, a lot of this S-support feels more like it could have been an A+ support.
Major points to Mercedes to being the one to do the proposing. A lot of people mistake her kind nature for being demure, which is not the case. She is bold, speaks her mind, and knows what she wants. And in this case, that’s Byleth. Her proposal is gentle and respectful, if a bit bland, and her reaction to Byleth’s acceptance is absolutely adorable. She’s so happy yet insecure, and I wish there was more communication from Byleth to reassure her.
13. Hanneman
Hanneman is an academic through and through, and his nature as a scholar comes through strongly in his S-support. He tries to approach things pragmatically, almost ruins things by talking about Byleth’s role in his research, but fortunately realizes that’s the wrong way to do it and takes a new approach with more feeling. It’s very similar to Linhardt’s S-support, but less self-centered and overall better. Hanneman treats Byleth as an equal, and shows enthusiasm in his own way.
Overall, this is an extremely pragmatic S-support, but it’s not without its charms. That being said, it definitely requires an interpretation of Byleth’s character where she has developed a taste for academia.
Favorite quotes:
“I suppose there’s no reason to hold ourselves back any longer.”
“I don’t want the power of your Crest - I want you.”
“I can’t wait to see the results of this undertaking.”
14. Yuri
This S-support is very consistent with Yuri’s character. The scene opens with Yuri trying to repay his “debt” to Byleth, which definitely lacks in romantic vibes, but works in context. It’s nice to see Yuri nervous and out of composure, but I admit I had been expecting…more…from him with how charming he’s supposed to be. Then again, like Sylvain, maybe the fact that he’s dropped the façade is supposed to make it meaningful. At least he blushes! Blushy Yuri is something I didn’t know I needed. The bit at the end where he whispers his true name in her ear is very nice, too.
But yikes…Yuri talks about his death. And considering that in most of the routes, Byleth ends up being most likely essentially immortal, this hits HARD. She is definitely facing the death of her lover in a few decades at most, and that is not something she wants to think about during a proposal.
Favorite quote: “In return for this ring, I ask for you.”
15. Raphael 
Raphael is a pretty clueless, non-romantic kind of guy. But the sudden proposal is very cute. Considering how awful he is at expressing himself, it works really well with his character to simply have him jump right in and get it over with.
That being said, I couldn’t help but feel that his reasoning for getting married was just a little loose. He always wants to be with Byleth and expresses that he wants to serve as her knight. Uh, you realize you can do that without marrying her right, bud? Byleth didn’t seem to be very into this proposal either, although she does have a wonderful little smile in the S-support portrait, which makes up for that. I love how the portrait emphasizes Raph’s size and strength by having him lift her up bridal style. It’s an actually flattering portrayal of him, too.
Favorite quote: “And…I’ll love you. Forever and ever. And ever!”
16. Sylvain 
Ah yes, Sylvain. Our favorite train wreck. The good news is that he’s finally taking charge of his life, and I like that he’s straightforward in this S-support rather than flirtatious, which means that you know he’s being sincere. It’s cute to see him genuinely happy, and his statement that “I’m going to spend the rest of our lives together trying to make you happy,” is very good.
However, the “If you told me you never wanted me to look at another woman, I’d go blind for you” is going too far. I know it addresses his skirt-chasing character, but I just don’t know if they could have a healthy relationship. I know this is rating the support scene, not the ship itself, but I don’t think that’s a positive indicator for the future.
17. Claude 
This S-support gives me so many bad vibes. Yes, he expresses his love for Byleth as well as his utmost confidence in her, but dude, actions matter more than words, and your actions speak VOLUMES. He’s the only one to just run off at the end of the S-support, and while I understand his reasoning — I really do — it’s clear that his own agenda and ambitions will always come before Byleth.
This is what I heard: “Right now, Fodlan is like a newborn... so that’s why I’m leaving, so you have to do all the hard stuff yourself. See ya, sucker!!” Ah yes. Prime husband and father material there. Obviously.
“I’m sorry that I won’t be by your side at such an important event...” Uh huh, yeah right. You’re obviously itching to get out of there.
I’m sorry, Claude stans, but giving Byleth an engagement ring and then running away for who knows how long is LAME.
18. Jeritza
The first thing that struck me about this S-support is the fact that it takes place in the Agarthan HQ, Shambhala. This is super meaningful because it means that Byleth and Jeritza go there together to use their killing prowess to take out Those Who Slither in the Dark post-Crimson Flower. It’s a nice way to tie up the route. The portrait is super dynamic and unique, too. That being said…
He’s still fixated on killing Byleth. If that’s your thing, then hey, I can’t judge. At least we all know that if he hasn’t killed her by now, it’s never going to happen. It’s such an empty threat it’s probably an inside joke by now. But Jeritza’s clearly still figuring out his feelings, which means I’m not sure it really counts as an S-support (it would have made a better A+ support imho). There are also things about this pairing and S-support that have some serious implications for who Byleth has become by this point and what the future is likely to look like. Good storytelling, yes, but as an S-support…not my favorite.
Favorite quotes:
“It is you alone who can slay the demon inside me.”
“To the very depths of hell, I will tumble down with you.”
19. Linhardt
This S-support falls flat for me. It’s like Hanneman’s, but worse because it’s super self-centered. I feel like it’s a really bad summary of Linhardt’s character because so much more could have been done with it. Linhardt has lots of good traits, and this S-support ignores all of them. Instead, we have a one-dimensional S-support that focuses on Linhardt’s laziness and penchant for napping. He’s so self-centered and consumed by his own interests, so saying that he wants to study Byleth for the rest of his life makes her more like an accessory to his life plans rather than a central component. At least when Hanneman says he wants to study Byleth, he makes it very clear that he loves her and wants her as a person.
And the line where he says "I didn’t honestly think you’d reject me” is just…wow. Much disappoint. If I were Byleth I would turn him down on the spot just for saying that.
20. Ashe 
Ashe’s S-support comes off to me like he’s pledging himself to her as a vassal more than actually proposing. Yes, he does take initiative and does the proposing, which is consistent with the fact that Ashe is a gutsy little guy. But he’s so stuck on being helpful that the S-support ends up feeling immature. Plus, Byleth doesn’t seem very enthusiastic about the proposal compared to other S-supports, and overall Ashe’s worship of Byleth comes off as more dependent than romantic.
21. Caspar
We’ve reached the bottom four S-supports, starting with this disaster. Caspar is juvenile, reckless, and oblivious. (Don’t get me wrong — I adore his character and see him like a little brother.) Byleth has to take charge of the proposal, which is not a problem in itself, but then Caspar confesses that he hasn’t even thought about marrying Byleth — or anyone at all! asaslkjasdflk FAIL
At least the victory shout is kind of cute…if painfully cheesy.
And they get worse from here…
22. Rhea
I don’t have a lot to say here. I know I said that I would keep my personal feelings about the pairings themselves out of this, but I feel like there are certain things about this particular pairing that need to be addressed along with this S support.
Age gap aside (because frankly with immortals, age doesn’t really matter anymore), Rhea CREATED Byleth’s mother, essentially making herself Byleth’s grandmother. Incest vibes, yo. Plus, she fully intended to sacrifice Byleth’s life in order to bring back Sothis — which, granted, is a sentiment that wears off, and Jeritza is just as bad in terms of original intent to kill Byleth. This makes any kind of romantic revelation on Rhea’s side just…weird.
There are some good quotes in this S-support, and we get a ton of reveals about Rhea’s character development in a short amount of time. She’s self-conscious of her other form as a dragon, she acknowledges the wrongs she did in the past, and she expresses a desire to repent. She acknowledges the pivotal role that Byleth has played through her choices and accomplishments, rather than attributing them to fate and the “flow of time.” But honestly this would be more appropriate as a final scene at the end of the game, not a romantic S-support.
23. Cyril
Oh boy. Where do I start with this one? It’s so bad...
This boy is BABY. 19 years old after the war? Sure. Attractive design? Yes. But still, he. is. BABY. And the S-support portrait makes it so much worse by making him look freaking TEN.
And he’s so, so oblivious. Even worse than Caspar. He barely has a personality as a character outside of being committed to the servant mentality, and he has had no opportunity to discover himself as a freaking person outside of his obsession with Rhea. It should be illegal to even consider this kid for S-support. One thing would be if it was platonic, like Alois or Gilbert, but Byleth gives him the ring, and that means it’s supposed to be romantic.
Plus, Cyril says that he loves Byleth, but it’s super casual and comes off more like familial or friendship love rather than romantic love. Unless I missed something, I don’t think Byleth ever says that she loves Cyril in their S-support. And the end is just the worst: “Love ya, see ya in the morning.” That’s IT???? There is absolutely no indication of a mature relationship, and that’s just scary and gross.
I just…really hate this S-support. There’s only one S-support that’s worse…
24. Sothis
Forget everything that I said about keeping my feelings about particular pairings out of this ranking. This is a TRULY CURSED S-SUPPORT.
I don’t care that Sothis is technically a goddess whose age is beyond counting or mortal comprehension. All that matters is she looks like a child. She is lolibait. And to top it all off, she doesn’t even have physical form (thank goodness) — she’s just an apparition in Byleth’s head!
And this quote? “I love you deeply! Overwhelmingly! passionately! Ours is a love without an end!” I only have two words: PEAK CRINGE.
It would be one thing if Sothis came back in her adult form. Or better yet, if she had always been in her adult form as portrayed in the fresco in the reception hall. You can do something with that. But that’s not the case, Sothis is portrayed as a pre-pubescent child in both appearance and personality, and that’s just pedophilia vibes, y’all. I can’t believe this is a sincere S-support option.
102 notes · View notes