#I adore his habit of finishing a conversation minutes or hours after the topic was dropped

[wearecrowley]

They love them, and it’s good for them too.

#good omens #crowley #anthony j crowley #shax #goodomensedit #my gifs #tvgifs #tvedit #I adore his habit of finishing a conversation minutes or hours after the topic was dropped #it's also sweet how he cares about the ducks #I bet he's the only demon in all of hell who cares about some random ducks

[astaroth1357]

Demigod MC Series: Demeter

Have I been using this series to vicariously punish Belphie for the events of Season 1? I cannot confirm nor deny that statement.

Demigod MC Series: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter

Lucifer

Didn't think too much of the "human" when they popped out of the portal. Sure they had a straw hat and a huge basket full of produce but it wasn’t like they were… Wait… No… Were they…?

Oh no. Oh nonononono, this is not good…!!

Demeter is notoriously doting and protective of her children (see her freakout and breakdown after Hades abducted of Persephone as proof) and they've pretty much done the EXACT. SAME. THING. here!!

It was a mad scramble by him and Diavolo to contact and appease their godly Mother Bear before she came roaring down to Devildom herself to turn them all into barley. Thankfully, Zeus must have intervened at some point because though she was indeed PISSED, she didn't threaten to barge in… yet.

She made one thing very clear. Bend so much as a single hair on her precious child's head and there would be WAR…

The MC received a 24 hour security detail after that. Just Mammon wasn't going to cut it, he needed NO chances. It was a full rotation of Mammon, him and Beel for the entirety of their stay (Asmo and Levi both threw hissy fits at the prospect of babysitting, Satan couldn’t be trusted not to kill them just to irritate him, and Belphie was out for… obvious reasons).

In some ways, it wasn’t so bad. The MC was a very mild sort of person, rather even tempered. He’d dare say they were pleasant, mostly content to just tend to their gardens and be out in the moonlight…

But the problem was, he just could not convince them to stay OUT of nature. Including the forests, which were full of hellish beasts fully intent on gnawing their flesh from their bones… and their specialty was plants, not animals, sooo…

Their habit of sneaking out to wander the woods got so bad that he very nearly considered pulling a Belphie 2 and locking them in the basement for their own good. But Devil knows what damage their mother would do if she found out…

At least they make for pleasant company… And Diavolo seems to like them quite a bit himself so the mortal gets a pass from him. Now if they’d only consider their own safety for a change…

Mammon

They make him a KILLING.

Like, no seriously. Their produce is insane!! He’s never tasted food so good, especially stuff that’s come fresh from the ground! It only took a few berries for Mammon to throw on a straw hat himself and start harvesting! He’s a farmer now, baby!!

Weeellll not quite. He’s still absolutely only in it for the money, but anything he brings to a farmer’s market goes so fast that he can hardly care about the labor! He’s never made this much Grimm in his life!! And it’s totally legit for a change!

He bought himself another car, paid off half of his debt, and even got Levi back that 2 or 3 grand he leant him centuries ago. Really, Mammon’s living his best life and it’s all thanks to MC!

It’s a good thing his blatant grifting doesn’t hurt his relationship with them at all, in fact they seem to enjoy having his help regardless. They bring him drinks on hot days or invite him on picnics and stuff, it’s… it’s really sweet. They’re very nice to him and he appreciates it…

But… COULD YA JUST STAY PUT ALREADY???

It drives him INSANE that they won’t stay out of dangerous places!! After he started caring about them for more than just a meal ticket it only got even worse!!

He’s not usually one for monitoring someone’s every move (that kind of control freak behavior is more a Lucifer thing) but he eventually had to set up familiars around the House just to keep them from sneaking out at night...

What was so interesting out there anyway?? There wasn’t any kind of plant that he could bring them himself! They didn’t have any need to be out there!! 

They’d keep telling him they’d be fine but it’s not like he’s going to actually buy that. They were too… nice to be dangerous or anything so why would he believe them?

No more running off, MC! Please, he’s beggin’ ya!!

Leviathan 

Wait, gardening? Like, being outdoors and stuff? Ew. No thanks, he’ll pass.

That was more or less his first reaction when they showed up and it never really got much better than that…

He admits that they’re friendly and it’s not like he dislikes them or anything, but their thing so far from his thing that they just don’t have a lot in common… you know?

For starters, they get So. Antsy. when they’re inside for too long! He tried to invite them to a marathon once, but they could hardly keep still and kept looking around like they were searching for a window… He said, “to jump out of.” They insisted just for some fresh air, but he didn’t buy it...

They’re nice enough to listen to his rants, but they’re barely ever inside for him to do so and like HELL is he going to leave his room and stand around out there for that long. Ranting is at least a one to two hour engagement! What if he gets hot out there? And have you SEEN Devildom bees?? Hell no!!

He has, however, asked them on multiple occasions to reproduce flowers he’s seen in different anime, especially ones that have a very unique look and they’ve done some real wonders with that!

He can now claim to be the only person to ever own a Ruby-Jade Vine plant, straight from the pages of TSL when it was used to brew tea for the Lord of Lechery during his brief illness and-is anyone even still listening anymore?

The point is, it’s a flower so rare it was imaginary but now HE has it!... or had it for about a week until his utter incompetence of all things plant killed it…

He begged the MC for another but they were out of the plants they needed to make it and would have to go back to the human world to find more… He’s still mourning his loss… Poor Henry 4.0…

Satan

Well… He’s called this MC “salt of the Earth” and he does truly mean it. Take of that what you will.

He doesn’t get much in the way of intellectual conversation out of this mortal UNLESS he’s talking about plants, farming, or botany… Interesting topics and complex in their own right to be sure, but that’s pretty much their wheelhouse and they like it there.

That being said, the feats that they can perform are genuinely mind-blowing! They are the ONLY person he has ever met who can cultivate the Devildom’s own ultra-rare Phantom Orchid, a plant only blooms when it reaches a perfect state of undeath (i.e. both taken care of and neglected just enough so that it's only barely alive. The balance is so tricky to master that one hasn’t bloomed down there for centuries!)

There’s also something just genuinely relaxing about watching them work or helping them in the gardens… More so than he’d ever expected from such a simple activity.

He admits that he’s taken quite a few strolls through the flower-filled courtyard of the Demon Lord’s Castle just to admire its beauty... But anything that they can grow just blows all of that out of the water!

They even taught him several magic botanical techniques so now he can grow some pretty mad plants himself. Lucifer never expected to find that giant Venus Flytrap in his closet, but one was there regardless. 😏

Just… out of curiosity one day, he asked the MC if they could make him a new kind of catnip. Not for any nefarious reason! You know… just for research purposes…

The nip they made was so effective that the House grounds were FILLED with nipped-up cats for a whole month! He was in Heaven!! (and Lucifer practically wiped those plants from existence so he couldn’t get any more… asshole...)

That must have inspired them because they apparently made a demons-only version that they told him about WELL after the fact. Had he known, he probably would have burned the stuff on principle... Do you know how dangerous demon-nip could be to them? Experiment responsibly, MC!

Asmodeus 

Ehhhh, gardening SOUNDS like one of those things that should be super Devilgram-able, but then you realize how sweaty and dirty you get in the process and it’s a huge turn off… Sorry MC.

When they first came down to the Devildom, he thought two things: 1) Such a sweet little flower child, as adorable as they were, would never survive; and 2) even if they could, he would never ever see eye-to-eye with them on the “wonders” of getting all up in the dirt.

Well, he was right about 2, but certainly not 1. Personally, he thinks his brothers worry about them too much, they ARE still a demigod.

At one point he saw a pack of hellhounds almost trample one of their vegetable gardens and they lost it. Word to the wise, never try to take on a child of Demeter in their own garden. Those hounds were wrapped up in rose vines before they could even yelp...

Yeah, the MC would be fine.

That being said, while everybody else clamors over their produce, he thinks that their flowers are really where it’s at!

Taking just five minutes in one of their gardens is something else... He’s never seen blossoms as healthy and immaculate in all the Devildom before! Their beauty could (almost) rivals his own! What they do isn’t just a hobby, it’s an art.

He’s taken multiple pictures with their blossoms and they go viral every time. It’s so rare to actually see gorgeous, petal-filled flowers in the Devildom, most of the native plants are of the man-eating variety.

His only complaint about this MC is that they seem to feel much more at home in work clothes and dirt than they do in any sort of party-look he tries to give them… Cute as they are, they can afford to gussy up sometimes can’t they? Mud and grass stains don’t make for a good look, sorry.

Beelzebub 

Beel gardens and the MC gardens as well. Add on that they seem to be able to grow all manner of fruits and veggies and he likes this one. A lot.

They had just finished apple-picking when the portal nabbed them so they had a massive basket of apples at the time. Naturally, Beel more or less stole the thing on sight, but the apples inside were so juicy and good that he almost shook them down for more on the spot!

Imagine his surprise when they, half pleadingly, explained to him that if he got them some seeds they could just grow more… and it wouldn’t even take that long.

To be clear, the formula he saw was this: Get seeds > bring seeds to mortal > mortal grows seeds > mortal makes endless supply of food….

Congratulations MC, you’ve now earned the sixthborn’s eternal loyalty after a grand total of… two minutes. He didn’t even know their name, but he was willing to take a bullet for them (provided he got more of those apples).

The next several months were spent with Beel attached to them to the hip in some way, but honestly? It was just so wholesome anyway…

If he’s helping in the garden, he never complains. He does most of the heavy lifting and actually likes being out there with them (unlike others...)

Many afternoons were spent sitting under fruit trees and talking. Sometimes, they go to the trouble of preparing a picnic or something but it would always inevitably end with Beel plucking the whole tree clean of whatever ripe (or unripe) fruit he can get his hands on with a smile. 

The MC never minded though. That’s just another excuse to grow more, right?

His only problem was when the MC would sneak out to the forest… especially when they get too antsy and just go alone. 

He HATES it when they do that! How is he supposed to keep them safe if they just wander off?? He knows that they have a special connection to nature and all, but it isn’t safe…

He’s flown in and scooped them back up to the House on numerous occasions and his “talking tos” get sterner after every rescue... Please stay put, MC! He’d have so many reasons to be sad if you were eaten… 😔

Belphegor 

Okay, he was looking for a capable, if not gullible, human. Not a shoeless flower hippy!

He honestly wasn't expecting much out of this one... Damn their little heart because they did genuinely believed his lies, it’s just that they weren't… well… They were really good at gardening.

… And it grew kind of hard to keep hating them whenever they'd show up just to give him fresh berries or a bouquet to see him smile… He may claim that his heart is made of nightmares and orphan tears, but who doesn’t enjoy being given a batch of flowers? 

Damn their sweetness too… Right to here.

When it came time to kill them he had a heavier heart than he thought he would, but kind of saw it like putting down the sacrificial lamb. Gotta be done to reach better goals... Stiff upper lip and all that.

Unfortunately for him, they had taken to carrying packets of demon-nip with them as a self-defense measure…

He wasn’t exactly sure what he expected when they shouted “Get nipped!” at him mid-attack, but it wasn’t a face full of some smelly herb! Like, really smelly…! Actually, that smelt kind of good… Hold on.

Turns out murderous rage really doesn’t last long after you get what is effectively ultra-strong catnip thrown in your face. They ended up having to go and tell Lucifer what happened themselves because Belphie was way too blissed out on the floor to do anything... They were legitimately worried they might have fried his brain...

He’s told the effects of the demon-nip lasted three days. He doesn’t know, because he hardly remembers any of it... They described him as like he was high on “weed” and “ecstasy” at the same time but he doesn’t know what either of those are either so it wasn’t helpful…

Truthfully, they were so nice to him while he was recovering that he couldn’t even be mad afterwards so all's well that ends well? Either way, he’s sleeping under their orchard trees from now on. It’s peaceful out there...

They burnt all that nip though. It’s some strong stuff...

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me demigods #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios

[patchofsunlight]

Back to You | Zuko x Fem!Reader

SUMMARY: Fire Lord Zuko falls in love with one of the Kyoshi Warriors sent to protect him. Thankfully, she falls in love with him too.

WORD COUNT: 5.2k I wanted it to be shorter than Pretty Eyes and succeeded... kind of

WARNINGS: okay so there’s some kissing, some swear words, some obvious mutual pining, some frustration, and that’s it. it’s pure fluff ngl

I hope you all like it! I actually had a lot of fun writing this and I think it came out pretty nice. Also requests are open! Thank you for reading and here we go.

“Hey, Fire Lord, your date is here.”

“Y/N, we’ve talked about this. You can call me Zuko, and it is a diplomatic meeting, not a date.”

“You sure? He’s wearing such nice clothes. I can do your hair real quick if you want, get you ready and cute in like five minutes.”

“No, Y/N, thank you. You can let Ambassador Gamu in.”

“Okay, okay. I’ll be just outside the door if you need me.”

“Of course.”

Zuko tried to ignore the cheeky blink the Kyoshi Warrior sent his way before leaving his office, a teasing grin adorning her painted face. When Suki told him she would bring the most experienced and talented of her warriors alongside her to protect him and serve as his guards, he definitely did not think he would have to deal with someone like Y/N.

He knew she was, for sure, a strong and intelligent fighter, being Suki’s second in command and impressively skillful with every single one of her weapons. He had watched her spar with her companions more than once and seeing Y/N fight never failed to take his breath away until his lungs were filled with only admiration and pride. However, one could call her less than professional, and her treating of the Fire Lord troubled most of the palace’s staff. And yet, to be honest, Zuko found it really hard to pretend he didn’t absolutely adore her.

Y/N felt like a breath of fresh air, like sunshine on a cloudy day, like seabreeze. He loved the way she always teased him and tried to make him laugh, loved the way she seemed to brighten up every room she walked into. Somehow she managed to bring joy to the same place he always associated with sadness and anger — every corner of the palace was happier with her around. That’s why he chose to keep her as his closest guard, even after every single one of his advisors told him time and time again to send the disrespectful Kyoshi Warrior away. Zuko knew he probably should, but he was slowly learning how to accept and cherish the things that made him feel like smiling, and Y/N was undoubtedly on that list.

He refused to admit how in love he was with her. He had convinced himself it was nothing but a crush, some sort of appreciation for her amazing fighting skills, but a small part of him knew that was not true. He had it bad for her and would kill a man to keep a smile on her face any day of the week.

“It is very good to know the Earth Kingdom is so willing to tighten its relationships with the Fire Nation, Ambassador Gamu. I hope I can assist you in every way possible to guarantee a brilliant future for all nations.”

The Earth Kingdom official smiled politely, “thank you very much, Fire Lord Zuko. Nevertheless, it is crucial you are made aware that not all our citizens are happy with the new… Arrangements between our countries. I heard you have had a similar problem here, haven’t you? I truly hope the Kyoshi Warriors have been good servants and protectors, sir.”

Zuko couldn’t help the upwards movement of his lips as he gazed at Y/N’s silhouette through the door crack. “They certainly have,” he watched her look behind her, probably feeling his stare, and grinned when she shot out her tongue at him in an amusing manner, “I am extremely grateful for having them here with me.”

-----

“Hey, Fire Lord, your date is here.”

He glanced up from his desk and furrowed his eyebrows at her, “it’s Zuko, and I don’t have any meetings scheduled for today.”

Y/N beamed and he was sure his heart did a somersault inside his chest, “I know! I was talking about me. I’m your date.”

He lightly blushed, “what?”

“Come on, Fire Lord, you’ve been working for hours on end. You need to take a break,” she scratched the back of her neck in embarrassment and thanked every spirit there was for the white paint hiding her reddened cheeks, “I thought we could take a walk around the palace, y’know? I’ll be beside you doing the whole protecting thing and you can rest a bit from the whole rebuilding the Fire Nation thing.”

Zuko hesitated, “I don’t know, Y/N. I really need to finish this,” he gestured to the awaiting letters and reports in front of him, “I can’t simply leave. I have obligations as Fire Lord and—”

“I’m aware of that,” she bit down on her lower lip teasingly and he couldn’t help but think about the inevitable gasps she would have earned if anyone else heard her interrupt him like that, “but you shouldn’t overwork yourself. Besides, I’m tired of standing around doing nothing. Please? It will be so fast no one will even notice you’re gone!”

He sighed, “Y/N…”

“Please, Zuko?”

It was probably the first time she had ever called him by his name. She knew how much he hated being called Fire Lord, only accepting it during important gatherings, assemblies or introductions, but insisted on calling him by that anyway. Zuko was absolutely sure she only did it to spite him and had to admit it was kind of endearing — he loved the small ways she found of constantly challenging him. However, he quickly learned he loved hearing her say his name a lot more.

He sat up suddenly, “five minutes.”

Y/N grinned so brightly he had to bit back his own smile, “fifteen!”

“This is not a negotiation. Five minutes and then I’ll come back to my duties as a leader.”

“Okay, okay. Ten minutes then.”

“What? No, I didn’t agree to that.”

“Oh? I’m sorry, Fire Lord. Fifteen it is.”

Zuko opened his mouth to oppose when he heard her chuckle in amusement before taking a hold of his arm and pulling him towards the gardens.

“We could feed the turtleducks, but I don’t really think that’s a good idea,” she chattered lightly, somewhat begrudgingly letting him walk arm in arm with her instead of keeping on dragging him around, “I already did that earlier today.”

He wrinkled his nose and stared at her with a silent question in his eyes, “why did you feed the turtleducks? We have people here to do that.”

“I know,” Y/N shrugged her shoulders, “but they are cute so I asked to feed them,” she threw him a smile, “I’m pretty sure they liked me.”

Zuko shook his head cheerfully and smiled back almost instantly, “Of course they did. How could they not?”

She turned her head to look at him so quickly he wondered how she didn’t get whiplash. The Kyoshi Warrior smirked, “are you flirting with me, Fire Lord?”

There was a tingling session going through his body as the color red creeped upon his neck, face and ears. Zuko wanted to say something smooth like “yes, I have been for a while, haven’t you noticed?” or “how could I not flirt with such a pretty lady like you?”, but he only managed to stutter, slightly panic, and then answer in a high-pitched voice, “what? No! What?”

Y/N lifted her free arm in surrender, trying not to laugh at his reaction, “alright, sorry for asking,” she smirked again before muttering, “I wouldn’t mind if you were, though.”

The Fire Lord’s eyes widened in surprise at her words, his tone now back to normal, “what do you mean?”

For some reason, his inquiry seemed to make her self-conscious of their conversation topic. Zuko wished for nothing more than to punch himself in the face. “It’s nothing. I was just joking.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Okay.”

“Great. Look, it’s been five minutes already!” she stared at her wrist so confidently he almost didn’t notice the lack of anything to actually check the time there. “You must go back to your Fire Lord things, right, Fire Lord?”

“We can still go see the turtleducks if you want?”

“Don’t worry! We can do that another time, when you’re not busy.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I am. Hey, that’s Suki! I need to talk to her! Bye!”

“What? Y/N—”

“Bye, Fire Lord!”

Y/N was going absolutely crazy. When Suki first brought her to the Fire Nation to protect the so-called revolutionary and strong new Fire Lord, she had been skeptical. After all her years training and helping people around the nations with the rest of the Kyoshi Warriors, she couldn’t care less about the damn Fire Lord — she had spent a long time locked up after Azula and her stupid gang captured them and no new or old Fire Lord had come to their rescue. In conclusion, the bitch could catch on fire himself and be an On-Fire Lord for all she cared (she had spent too long thinking about that joke but that definitely did not matter), even though Suki had told her she knew the guy and that he was a great person or whatever.

Now she was biting her own tongue and trying to keep from flirting with him. In her defense, though, Zuko was a thousand times more good-looking and a billion times nicer than she expected him to be. She couldn’t help but always look for ways to make him smile, loving all his little quirks and habits, and suddenly found herself by his side a lot more than she needed to. She constantly acted as a personal guard, waiting outside his door during private meetings and accompanying him on walks, assemblies and gatherings in a somewhat intimate manner. She didn’t need to be right beside him the whole time — she could protect him from afar and maintain her distance like the other Kyoshi Warriors had chosen to, but Y/N simply didn’t want that. The stupid feelings she was slowly building towards the Fire Lord were dangerous at worst and annoying at best, constantly distracting her from her duties and responsibilities as Suki’s second in command.

It was infuriating, since love and relationships had never been really the type of stuff Y/N liked to partake in. She was good at fighting and giving witty responses and making jokes, but not at liking someone. Specially not liking Fire Lord Zuko, who was one of the most powerful people in the world and would certainly end up marrying some rich Fire Nation girl to guarantee a great and honorable successor to the throne or something like that.

When she finally went back to her individual palace room after a long day of trying not to embarrass herself in front of Zuko anymore and just all-around avoiding talking with him, she sat down before the mirror and started to take her facepaint off. That part of her routine, alongside putting on the paint in the mornings, had always felt like a ritual of sorts, calming her down and enabling her to let go of any unimportant worries. 

Y/N let out a tired sigh, stared at her bare face and grinned. She might have fallen in love with the Fire Lord, but at least living in the palace allowed her to sneak into the kitchens in the middle of the night and steal some fruit tarts. She got up from her spot in front of the mirror and exited the room as quietly as possible, strongly believing that eating something would take her mind off the Fire Lord and his beautiful golden eyes. 

-----

After another full hour of fruitlessly waiting for sleep, Zuko decided to put on an old cloak and walk around his palace. Pacing had always made wonders for helping him collect his thoughts and calm down from whatever it was that troubled him that day. It was not the first time he took on that habit and it would not be the last.

He honestly didn’t notice the person creeping up on him until he was pinned to a wall, an arm to his throat not pressing hard enough to hurt him, but enough to quicken his heartbeat. Zuko stared at the one responsible for the assault with confusion shining in his eyes, unable to recognize her without her greasepaint until she blinked and stepped back.

“Fire Lord?”

He widened his eyes, “Y/N? What are you doing here?”

“I was headed for the kitchens. What are you doing here? Did something happen?”

“No. I just couldn’t sleep.”

“I see,” she nodded and yawned, averting her eyes from him, “you shouldn’t be out and about without a guard, tho. You know that.”

“I’m pretty capable of protecting myself, Y/N.”

“Yeah, yeah. Sure.”

He crossed his arms in defense, “what is that supposed to mean?”

“Do you want to go grab some snacks with me?”

“I—” he stared at her, for the first time seeing her blush under his gaze, “okay.”

“Great! Let’s go, Fire Lord.”

Zuko stayed quiet while they walked through the palace. He watched Y/N greet every single night servant they met on their way, earning big smiles and excited waves. For some reason, knowing how loved she was by his workers made his heart swell with pride. She would make an excellent Fire Queen someday. Or Fire Lady. Was there an official name for the Fire Lord’s wife? He couldn’t remember.

Zuko felt all the blood in his body drop to his feet when he noticed where his thoughts had wandered to. He shouldn’t think about Y/N as his wife — she was merely a protector, the help. He was not in love with her and therefore should not deliberate such things, not even by accident.

But he had never seen her bare faced before and he couldn’t help but take note of how alluring she was. He had always considered her pretty, but now he could really see her and she was so much more than just pretty.

“Come on, Fire Lord. I’m sure they have fruit tarts.”

He smiled as she sneaked inside the door to the kitchens, following soon after. In a matter of minutes they were sat before each other on the ground, sharing a bunch of fruit tarts Y/N had found hidden inside one of the cabinets. There was a comfortable silence surrounding them and Zuko appreciated how easy it was to be near her, without expectations or curious looks. Whenever he was next to the Kyoshi Warrior, he came close to forgetting his titles and obligations, satisfied with being simply who he was.

It felt nice.

“You look good with your hair down,” she announced suddenly, unaware of the thoughtful look on his face, “I like it.”

He felt his cheeks burn, “thank you, Y/N,” the young Fire Lord inhaled deeply to gather the courage necessary to express the response that came to mind, “you look good all the time.”

She stilled her movements with a fruit tart inches from her mouth, eyes blinking in surprise. After a tense moment, she grinned and lowered her arm, “do you really think so or are you just being nice?”

“I mean it, Y/N. You are… You are absolutely beautiful.”

The pair studied each other for a few instants, eyes sparkling with a breathtaking feeling both easily recognized but were not ready just yet to deal with. Y/N beamed at him, her face pink at the compliment. Zuko could feel his heart twist and turn inside his chest, butterflies flying in his stomach. “Why, thank you, Fire Lord. For the record, I have found you beautiful since I first saw you. I was expecting some rude and cranky old guy and there you were, with your pretty eyes and nervous smile. It was pleasant in a very surprising way.”

The Fire Lord was pretty sure she could hear his heartbeat as she leaned in almost subconsciously, her smile brightening up every small spot his eyes could see of the dark kitchen. 

He was, indeed, very much in love with her, and there was no use in denying it, not while she averted her gaze to his lips and seemed to get closer and closer until their noses touched. Zuko’s breath hitched inside his throat as her lips ghosted his, eyes fluttering close before a loud bang sent them jumping in opposite directions, searching the source of the noise.

“Y/N? Is that you?”

The Kyoshi Warrior scratched her neck shyly, adamantly avoiding Zuko’s stare, “yes, Izum. How are you?”

The servant walked up to her with crossed arms, “I told you to stop invading the kitchens at night! You’re gonna put an end to our fruit tart stock, young lady.”

The Fire Lord watched the interaction curiously. Y/N and Izum smirked at each other as if they were old friends. “Well, if you don’t want me to steal your fruit tarts, you should maybe stop making the best fruit tarts in the entire universe.”

“Flattery won’t get you anywhere, honey.”

“You sure?”

“Yes! Fire Lord Zuko will be alerted about this.”

“I think he might already know.”

The young man seemed to finally notice Zuko’s presence, widening his eyes in surprise and bowing respectfully, “I’m so sorry, sir. I didn’t see you there, it’s too dark and—”

“It’s fine, Izum, don’t worry. We’ll be off your kitchens in a second. Right, Y/N?”

“Of course,” she brushed the dust off her pants and walked to stand beside the Fire Lord, ignoring her friend’s raised brows, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“You will,” Izum looked from her to Zuko and then back to her, a teasing smile on his face when he greeted them goodbye, “good night, Y/N. Good night, Fire Lord Zuko.”

“How do you know him?” the Fire Lord asked after they left the kitchen, some sort of discomfort growing inside him at the way the Kyoshi Warrior had interacted with the servant.

“Oh, Izum is a good friend. He regrets deeply telling me where they keep the fruit tarts, but it’s too late now. We met during my first week here.”

“I see.”

“Let me take you back to your room, Fire Lord. It is already very late.”

Despite his unacknowledged jealousy, he wasn’t fast enough to bit back his smirk, “shouldn’t I be the one leading you to your room?”

“I am the guard, Zuko. I am the one taking care of you, not the other way around.”

He chuckled, “right.”

“I can put you to bed if you want, I used to do that to my younger sibling sometimes.”

“Shut up, Y/N.”

She threw her had back in laughter and he grinned.

They didn’t ever talk about what happened (or more accurately didn’t happen) during that dark night in the kitchens. Zuko was progressively busier with meetings and peace treaties, slowly putting the Fire Nation back in good rails. Y/N would routinely force him to take a break every once in a while, be it by leading him outside his office or taking his attention away from work and starting conversation.

Spirits, he was so in love with her.

It was during one of those breaks that one of her fellow Kyoshi Warriors knocked on his workroom’s door and entered with a nervous look on her face, nodding at him in respect before turning her attention to her friend, “Y/N?”

The young warrior smiled, “hey, Naya. Is everything alright?”

“Suki wants to speak with you. Privately.”

Y/N’s expression was instantly filled with worry and concentration. She gripped her katana tightly, walking towards the girl, “I want three warriors guarding the Fire Lord at all times, we are not taking chances regarding his safety. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Y/N.”

“Good,” she turned to Zuko, her stone-cold face easing momentarily. She marched up to him with conviction before planting a kiss on his cheek that made his body burn with surprise and happiness. “Be careful, Fire Lord. I’ll be back soon, okay?”

“I—I… I mean… I’m—” he kept on stuttering, unable to form an entire sentence with his feelings all over the place, “You… I—”

She smirked, walking away backwards, “see you, Zuko.”

Naya looked at him with a cheeky smile after Y/N left the room, crossing her arms and staring in a teasing manner. Zuko was still rooted into place, widened eyes and reddened cheeks watching the now closed door. “Are you alright, Fire Lord Zuko?”

“I—yeah. I am. Yes,” his tone was definitely not as certain as he wanted it to be, “of course.”

The girl giggled, “sure.”

The Fire Lord would only see his favorite guard again on the following day. She came to visit him in his office and had a gravity to her eyes that he was unfamiliar with, lips pressed together in determination.

“What happened?” he immediately asked, the letter he was working on quickly forgotten. “Are you okay?”

“There have been attacks to the warriors in Kyoshi Island,” she declared, “not everyone is happy with our new arrangements. People think Earth Kingdom fighters shouldn’t be helping the Fire Nation in any way.”

“Oh,” he managed to answer, anxiety building up inside him at her hardened expression. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, Zuko,” she looked away from him, “but we can’t leave our companions to fend for themselves.”

He could feel his heartbeat pick up, “I see.”

“Suki is sending me back to Kyoshi Island,” Y/N confessed, a hint of sadness to her tone, “I’m her second in command and I should be there to help our warriors through this.”

A heavy silence fell upon the room, tension sparkling between the couple. He knew what that piece of information meant, knew what it would cause.

“You’re leaving.”

She softened almost instantly, taking a step closer to him and then hesitating, “no!” he stared and she sighed, “I mean, yes, but I’ll return when it’s over,” she looked at him with some sort of desperation, eagerly searching for something she couldn’t find, “when everything’s done and dealt with, I’ll return.”

Zuko nodded, a disheartening sting running through his chest, “I understand. Leaving is your duty as a leader.”

“I’m not leaving, Zuko,” another step, “I’ll come back. I’ll—” she hesitated, taking a final step towards him and reaching for his hand uncertainly, “I’ll come back to the Fire Nation,” she interlaced their fingers carefully, “I’ll come back to you.”

It was his turn to step closer, bringing his free hand up to her face and sighing when she leaned onto it, hopeful eyes shining at him. When he finally spoke, his voice was a whisper, “will you?”

She chuckled sadly, moving to rest her forehead on his, staining his face with the white paint and rubbing circles alongside the back of his hand with her thumb, “I will. You are not getting rid of me this easily, Fire Lord.”

“Good. I didn’t want to.”

She smiled. On that exact moment, Suki opened the door and studied the scene before her with a bittersweet gaze, “Y/N, it’s time to go.”

His chest clenched in pain and distress, glancing from Suki to Y/N with anguish, “you are going now?”

The Kyoshi Warrior distanced herself from him and Zuko could’ve sworn he felt physical pain at the space between them, “I’ll come back, Zuko. I promise.”

-----

It was like he had a constant sunshine right beside him and now it was gone. He was pretty sure every single person in the palace had noticed the liking he had taken to moping around and staring sadly at the turtleducks, missing the one he had come to love. He thought his feelings for her would subside after her departure, but, oh dear, was he wrong. The deep ache that settled in his chest was enough to constantly remind him of how much he liked her, how much he missed her. Not having her around hurt so much that it became inconvenient, making it difficult to work and complete his responsibilities when he was constantly thinking about her safety and about what could have been if she had stayed just a little longer. Zuko thought they had finally reached the start of something new but she wasn’t here anymore and he would have to wait to find out.

Suki tried to report to him what was going on at Kyoshi Island whenever she could. Y/N was working hard to calm down the conflicts while at the same time training the new and old Kyoshi Warriors as well as possible. Suki told him it would take a while until things were okay enough for Y/N to return to the Fire Nation, but it would happen eventually.

He was so desperately in love it was embarrassing. He craved her presence, her voice, her laugh, her touch. He wondered if she felt the same and concluded that no, probably not. To be honest, however, he would accept anything coming from her, even some second-hand love. He would still be happy if she decided to settle for him after being made aware of his feelings.

The Fire Lord was adamant on telling her everything he felt when she came back — and she would come back, she had promised —, because being away from Y/N made him realize how much happier he was with her and he refused to let her leave again without knowing that he just absolutely adored her.

Meanwhile, Y/N felt incredibly overwhelmed. Between helping train the Kyoshi Warriors and trying to solve any misunderstanding with the Earth Kingdom citizens in a diplomatic way, she found it hard to breathe. It was somehow good, to be honest, because it didn’t leave her with much time to think about him. And, Spirits, did she think about him when she could. She was extremely excited to finally go back to the Fire Nation and just be by his side again.

There was a part of her that worried. Even though they had had multiple moments when she truly believed he felt the same, they never really spoke about it. Zuko didn’t seem the best at communication, and Y/N generally chose to joke around and tease instead of actually voicing her emotions. 

“Miss Y/N, you must understand—”

“No, Mung, you and your so-called rebels are the ones who are not understanding. Fire Lord Zuko is trying to rebuild and strengthen the ties with Earth Kingdom in a healthy way for both nations—”

“But Miss Y/N—”

“—and the Kyoshi Warriors are collaborating with that by being a part of the official guard. How, for Spirits’ sake, is you attacking my warriors a good way of achieving anything you might want to achieve?”

The man swallowed harshly while he fidgeted. Y/N had worked hard to get a meeting with the rebels on Kyoshi Island, but was pleasantly surprised to notice how unorganized they were. “The Kyoshi Warriors shouldn’t collaborate with the Fire Nation, Miss Y/N,” a young man guarding the rebel leader’s door interrupted their staring contest, “the Fire Nation has done nothing but cause destruction and suffering. We won’t have our beloved warriors being corrupted by such a horrible mindset as the Fire Nation’s.”

“I appreciate your concern, but Zuko,” she cleared her throat in embarrassment at the verbal slip, “Fire Lord Zuko is different. He cares about people and he seeks redemption for Fire Nation’s wrongdoings. Having a good relationship with him is a great deal for the Earth Kingdom, believe me.”

The two men exchanged a look before returning their gaze to her. She tried to bit back a smile when she noticed the meaningful expression on their faces, signalizing she might finally be able to go home.

She tensed at the thought. Was that what Fire Nation was now? Home? 

Or was she ready to admit the real home she had been thinking of was a certain Fire Lord all along?

-----

It was a hot day in the Fire Nation and Zuko was busy with his daily amount of sulking and missing his favorite girl when he heard a commotion going on somewhere near him. He confusedly followed the sound, finding the Kyoshi Warriors gathered around and talking loudly. The Fire Lord furrowed his brows.

“Is everything okay?” his voice quieted them down and he watched while the young fighters exchanged knowing looks. “Did something happen?”

“Yeah, Fire Lord, it did,” his heartbeat picked up immediately and he turned towards the voice he had fallen in love with, finding her dazzling smile. Y/N crossed her arms in a teasing manner, “told you I’d come back.”

Zuko stared at her while the other warriors scrambled towards somewhere else, aiming to leave the couple alone. He smirked, “you did tell me.”

She walked closer to him until they were chest to chest, and he wondered if she could feel his jumping heart against her, “I think I even made a promise.”

“You surely did.”

Y/N grinned, “well, then I guess—”

“I’m in love with you.”

This was not in his plans. He meant to say a lot of things about how he slowly fell for her during the months they spent together, but Zuko simply couldn’t help from blurting a confession out like a dumbass. He had craved being around her so much during these weeks apart and now she was finally there, just within reach. He couldn’t take any more dancing around each other.

She beamed, “that surely makes this less awkward.”

“Wait, what?”

Before he could wrap his head around her words, Y/N took a hold of his collar and pulled him to her, gazing at his lips as their noses touched, just like weeks ago in the kitchens. She smiled softly, eyes fluttering close, “I’m in love with you too, Fire Lord.”

“Oh, thank the fucking Spirits.”

The Kyoshi Warrior laughed against his mouth, sending a tingling sensation down his back. His hands held onto her waist, extinguishing any space between them before he kissed her deeply, relief and happiness flooding his senses all at once. His own personal sunshine was finally next to him again and he revelled from the pure warmth she provided, chasing all insecurities and fears away until only his love remained.

“I missed you,” he mumbled on her lips, so intoxicated by her presence he could have forgotten how to breathe.

He could literally feel her smile between kisses, “I missed you too, Zuko,” she moved slightly away so to be able to stare at his eyes, “but don’t you worry, Fire Lord. I’ll always come back to you.”

Zuko chuckled, “you’re so cheesy.”

“You love it. Can I be even cheesier?”

“Go ahead, pretty girl.”

“Hey, Fire Lord, your new permanent date is here, and she’s not leaving.”

“That was horrible, Y/N. But good to know.”

He attached his lips to hers again and, for the first time, Zuko didn’t have a single worry for the future or for his fate. For better or for worse, he had his favorite guard by his side, and that was enough.

ATLA taglist: @bottledcostcowater​ @officiallydarkgeek (for some reason I can’t tag you I’m sorry??) and @beifongsss​ and @azucanela​ I know you didn’t ask to be tagged but you didn’t seem to mind last time so here I am again?? if you don’t want to be tagged anymore just lmk!!

I hope you liked it!!

#atla #atla x reader #zuko x reader #zuko #zuko imagine #avatar the last airbender #avatar the last airbender x reader #suki #zuko x fem!reader #zuko x f!reader #fire lord zuko #fire lord zuko x reader #suki x reader #kyoshi warriors #kyoshi warrior reader #this was kinda cute wasn't it #i'm lowkey proud of this #ngl

[confinedmadness]

ChroNoiR Moments I Love

I did not include anything from videos linked in my post on favorite ChroNoiR collabs.

I included moments where ChroNoiR isn’t together but the two of them are talked about or have some sort of interaction.

I included habits or things that both of them do repetitively.

Keeping this at 10 because if I don’t put a limit, I’ll end up linking every single video where ChroNoiR is so much as mentioned.

★ Kanae Immediately Understanding Kuzuha’s Message

This is from the 2019-08-18 Project Winter collab with Sasaki, Lize, Ange, Fairys, Tsukasa, Shiina, Kuzuha, and Kanae. Most of the time, when talking about ChroNoiR in this collab, people mention the match where both of them were traitors and perfectly coordinated to win. 

While that was great and exciting, my personal favorite ChroNoiR moment in this collab is when Kuzuha chilled Shiina, and Kanae, who saw that, immediately understood that Kuzuha was trying to tell them Shiina was a traitor. From Kanae’s POV, this is around 40:30, while in Kuzuha’s POV, this is around 40:45.

If you watch from Kuzuha’s POV, you can also listen to him just praising Kanae and saying how he knew if anyone were to understand it would be Kanae.

★ Kuzuha’s Perfect Kanae Impersonation

This is from a PUBG collab with Ran, Sentan, Kuzuha, and Akabane. When Kuzuha comments that the others’ impersonations of Kanae were off, they ask Kuzuha for an example of what a good Kanae impersonation would be. Kuzuha delivers with what is now one of his memorable lines 「SE方面敵いるよ葛葉」(”Kuzuha, there’s an enemy in the SE direction”), and the other three, as well as the comment section, erupt in excitement over it. It’s around 52:45 in Baneki’s video.

Later, in the last ChroNoiR.tv episode, Kanae says the same line at around 15:00 as Kuzuha and the comment section note that they’re finally hearing the real version. Kanae even includes the “kyaaaaaaaaa” reaction from the original collab above.

(Note: Kanae actually says 「方向」while Kuzuha said「方面」but the phrase means basically the same thing.)

★ Kuzuha Talks About Kanae Tweeting a Formal Apology

In his solo stream, one of the topics Kanae talked about with his viewers were gropers and their victims. Unfortunately, some people interpreted part of his words negatively, so Kanae took down the archived video later on and also posted an apology on twitter.

Kuzuha, in his own stream , laughed when he saw Kanae’s apology, saying that he’s sure it’s because Kanae said something easy to misunderstand again. (Timestamp: 11:20:38) When his own viewers explained what caused the buzz, Kuzuha said that he can’t believe this is what the VTuber world has come to, and says that if the internet pitchfork mob is after Kanae for something like this, then they should come for him as well.

Personally, I thought it was really nice that Kanae tried to understand why it isn’t easy for victims to call for help. Yes, he did say he couldn’t understand why they couldn’t do something that seems easy, but it’s also true that he discussed these and listened to his viewers’ explanations with what I thought was a very genuine desire to understand. A Japanese viewer even commented that as a victim, she was glad Kanae had this conversation. 

★ Kuzuha Blaming Kanae for Something He Said

Kuzuha mentions in his solo stream (1:03:03) that his image of guys who play guitar are those who like hitting women. Upon realizing that he said something that could be taken negatively, he immediately backtracks and puts the blame on Kanae saying, “it was Kanae who told me that, but he probably won’t remember.” (Kanae’s character is someone who supposedly has amnesia)

In Kanae’s solo stream (26:05), his own viewers let him know about what Kuzuha said. Kanae only said that “if Kuzuha says that I said so then maybe I did, but I don’t remember”.

At the end of their ChroNoiR Donkey Kong stream (2:05:55), as Kuzuha jokingly blames Kanae for various things again, Kanae brings up the guitarist line blamed on him. As Kuzuha emphasizes that Kanae is currently confused and asks him to talk to his lawyer, Kanae responds with a threat to sue him and the stream ends with Kanae saying “see you at court”. This last interaction was especially funny for me.

★ ChroNoiR Introducing Themselves as Each Other

In ChroNoiR collabs, Kuzuha and Kanae frequently introduce themselves as each other. I just find it cute, especially when they both make fun of each other during the impersonation.

In one of these instances, Kanae tries mimicking Kuzuha’s introduction line but accidentally says 「ヴァンパイア吸血鬼葛葉です」 (Literally “I’m vampire vampire Kuzuha”) instead of the actual 「吸血鬼VTuber葛葉です」(”I’m vampire VTuber Kuzuha”). Unfortunately, I can’t find the original stream when he said that.

In an ARK collab (7:20:15), when Kanae successfully introduces himself as Kuzuha with the correct introduction, Kuzuha notes that he got it right this time. More recently, during their 2020 Christmas collab (0:27), Kanae once again introduces himself as Kuzuha using the wrong version (this time seemingly on purpose).

★ Kuzuha is 7 Hours Late; Kanae Gets Strawberry Au Lait

At their 2018 Christmas collab, Kuzuha is 7 hours late to their agreed meeting time (1:35). Later on (6:20), when Kanae says that wants one of the 3 cups of strawberry au lait that Kuzuha has, Kuzuha didn’t want to give one to him but relented in the end because Kanae reminds him that he was late. Because of this, Kanae is sometimes referred to as “the man who forgave 7 hours of lateness with a cup of strawberry au lait”.

★ Kanae Praising Kuzuha’s Singing

Kuzuha mentioned before that he doesn’t like singing in front of other people because of a previous experience where someone he called “Mysterious Mushroom Man” corrected his singing while they were in karaoke. So I actually love the times when either Kuzuha or Kanae mention that they went to karaoke together. 

My favorite is this moment in one of their Apex collabs where Kanae mentions this one song Kuzuha sang in karaoke that he considers his favorite among the songs Kuzuha sings. Kuzuha admits that he was happy to hear Kanae tell him his singing was good, and that he ended up singing that same song a lot in karaoke since then. It’s around 1:38:10 in Kanae’s POV and around 1:36:14 in Kuzuha’s POV.

★ Kuu-chan and Kanakana

Kanae sometimes calls Kuzuha “Kuu-chan” in order to tease him. This happened more often early in their careers, but still happens every now and then. Aside from the cute name, there is also the fact that Kuzuha will always reply with「やめろその呼び方」(”Don’t call me that.”) like clockwork.

Kuzuha doesn’t allow anyone to call him Kuu-chan. In fact, the only one in Nijisanji he has given explicit permission to use -chan with his name is Moira who calls him Kuzuha-chan. On the other hand, Kanae is called by a lot of nicknames, both by his collab partners and his fans. The most common one is Kanakana.

During one of Kanae’s chat streams (18:49), one commenter asked how he would react if Kuzuha called him “Kanakana”. In response, Kanae says that he probably wouldn’t be able to take it *insert disgusted noises* and just die on the spot. 

I find it so cute they hate the nicknames, especially from each other. And personally, while I love Kanae teasing “Kuu-chan”, I do adore the fact that they call each other by name.

★ "Because it’s Kuzuha”

This is from one of the CR cup practice matches when Kanae was part of Kanaminto (Kanae, Admin, Kamito). When Kanae’s party encountered Kuzuha’s, Kanae asked for time from his team to execute the finishing move on Kuzuha (1:25:03). “Because it’s Kuzuha”. Hearing the reason, his teammates immediately agreed as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.

During their team practices, Kanae did in fact tell his team beforehand that he would like to perform the finishing move if they encounter Kuzuha. It was so cute how excited he was to be able to actually do it.

★ Kuzuha Not Realizing that Kanae was Streaming

This apex stream is definitely one of the most memorable even just for the fact that Kuzuha was unaware that Kanae was streaming for a whole 30 minutes. Kuzuha joined the voice chat at around 27:25. When Kanae informs him that he’s streaming, Kuzuha asks to confirm that he really is streaming, but mishears Kanae’s answer「うん、そう」(”Yeah, I am”) as「嘘」(”That was a lie.”).

They continue to talk, with Kuzuha mentioning some unusual food preferences among others, until finally at 1:00:25, Kuzuha realizes Kanae is streaming when Kanae tells him about something from the comment section. The sudden change in Kuzuha’s energy was amusing to watch. It was probably partly due to the shock because Kuzuha mentioned he was just about to talk about confidential matters right around the time he finally realized.

.

.

♥ ChroNoiR ♥

#posts #nijisanji #vtubers #vtuber #chronoir #kanae #kuzuha #にじさんじ #くろのわ #クロノワール #叶 #葛葉

[softyoongiionly]

BlackHeart Bakery

Who says Halloween can’t be romantic?

Pairing: Emo! Jungkook x Reader

Word Count: 3.7k

Genre: fluff

A/N: HI OMG IM SO SORRY THIS IS LATE. I love you, I hope you like it. I’m sorry it isn’t longer but, I still can’t wait for you to read it.

-you never imagined that the quirky lil bakery down the street from your university would change your life  

-But it did

-“Omg shut up, you’re so dumb.”

-“Rawr xD”

-“Did you just say rawr xD out loud??? That totally defeats the purpose of its existence...”

-“Don’t cite the deep magic to me witch, I was there when it was written.”

-“And now you’re quoting the chronicles of narnia- alright just go back to sleep you big dummy...”

-“Mmm but you married a big dummy so what does that say about you”

-“Jungkook don't spoil it oh my god!”

-“Like they don’t know what’s coming already- spoiler alert losers! I get the girl.”

-“I hate you...”

-“Mm yeah- I love it when you talk dirty to me baby. The last time you said that- we ended up fuc-“

-“Ok! That’s enough! Our story begins...”

-Jungkook’s bakery was quite famous around your city

-If people didn’t come for the gaudy Halloween decorations  

-They came for the music  

-Exclusively pop punk, if you’re wondering

-It was like 2009 everyday  

-Which was comforting, considering the world has gotten a little

-Tricky

-Since then

-But anyways

-If they didn’t come for the music or the decorations

-They came for the AMAZING espresso  

-And the spooky themed treats

-But if you’re being honest

-You think the main thing that keeps them coming back

-Is Jungkook  

-If his sweeping black hair didn’t get you

-Or the adorable cheeky twinkle in his eyes

-It was the tattoos and the piercings  

-He looked like he walked right off of a black veil brides music video set  

-He was hot

-This was obvious

-But he didn’t seem to think so

-You had come to the conclusion that he was oblivious  

-he shoved his feet into his big black doc martens every morning  

-Slipped on his beaded bracelets and studded chokers

-Pulled his fall out boy t-shirt over his

-Massive

-Tattooed

-Biceps

-And just thought hm

-I’m pretty average I guess (lol)

-That’s a direct quote from him btw

-Men truly are hopeless

-Jungkook opened the bakery two years ago

-He had mentioned to you that he had saved up money from his 3 part time jobs to put a down payment on the building  

-Which was wedged between a sex shop

-And a thrift store

-And honestly his bakery

-Blackheart Bakery, if you’re being specific  

-Fits right in

-Jungkook refuses to hire new staff

-“They won’t do it right.” He whined to you one day

-“One time I tried to hire this guy and he put the sugared googly eyes on the cookie skeletons ALL WRONG”

-“How do you put googly eyes on wrong?” You had giggled

-“you just do- i- See? This is exactly why I can’t hire anyone...”

-You had started chewing on the end of your pencil in the midst of your laughter

-It was an unconscious habit

-And it makes Jungkook shift uncomfortably, his hands moving off of the top of your table

-“Don’t do that...” he had muttered, smirking to himself as he walked back behind the counter  

-he did that a lot

-He’d mutter something  

-Mildly flirtatious under his breath and then  

-Just walk away

-It was quite confusing

-But honestly you had a feeling he was just a filrty person  

-You certainly weren’t the only girl he smirked at

-Not that you pay attention

-Ok  

-Maybe you do  

-Kinda  

-Pay attention  

-but it’s not your fault!!!!  

-You just  

-Can’t help but feel a little jealous

-You kiiiiiinda have a little thing for him

-Ok

-Maybe it’s a big thing  

-Maybe it’s a massive

-Gigantic

-Towering  

-Crush  

-But look at him!!!

-You simply couldn’t be blamed

-It was his fault  

-Yep

-That’s what you’re going with

-It was Jungkook

-And his tight t shirts

-His ripped jeans

-His dangly earrings

-His tattoos

-His big

-Stupid boots

-Ugh ok

-Focus  

-You have work to do

-The whole reason you began coming to Jungkook's cafe was so you -could find a consistent place to study for your exams

-You were in school to become a teacher :)  

-And teachers have to study very very hard  

-Educating the youth is no easy feat  

-Jungkook had asked what you were studying during the first week you arrived at his spooky house of baked goods

-“Oh I’m an education major”

-“Ahh so you’re getting an education about...education.” He concludes

-“I love it.”

-“So meta.”

-“Are they educating you on the disparities between impoverished children and wealthier children?”

-His wide eyes were brimming with genuine curiosity  

-You kind of got a kick out of how candid he was about such heavy conversation topics

-“Not as much as they should be but, I’m actually writing a paper on a similar topic right now...”

-This caused a brilliant grin to come over his face

-It was almost blinding really

-And it made your heartbeat all wonky  

-“Of course you are. You look smart like that...”

-He had backed away from your table then, seemingly satisfied

-Had you passed the vibe check?

-“I’ll leave you to your paper.” He nodded to your laptop but as he walked away, he pivoted back towards you on and the heel of his combat boot, “welcome to Blackheart Bakery by the way, let me know if I can get you anything.”

-Another brilliant smile is sent your way  

-“Thank you.” You had smiled back, sending a tiny wave his way

-Which in turn, made HIS heartbeat all wonky  

-You’re cute

-Like really cute

-And despite how often it may seem like his eyes are elsewhere

-They are ALWAYS on you

-Every chance he gets he is glancing your way

-Smirking to himself at how endearing you are

-Brow furrowed

-Lips pouted in concentration  

-Completely oblivious to his gaze

-He has to remind himself to look away  

-He doesn’t want to be a creep

-“Creepy men deserved to get kicked in the teeth...”

-He’s said this to you before when another patron had made you uncomfortable

-Jungkook kicked him out immediately  

-“If you don’t leave, I’ll have no choice but to kick you in the teeth. One, because I can’t compromise my personal philosophy and two because you’re making my favorite customer uncomfortable.”

-Oh look there goes your heartbeat again

-WONKY

-The guy leaves in an angry rush, flipping Jungkook off in the process

-Saying something about leaving a bad Yelp review  

-He doesn’t care tho

-He definitely doesn’t want to be a creep

-You’re just so  

-Pretty

-Ugh

-He rolls his eyes at himself behind the espresso bar

-The latte in front of him neglected  

-In need of a bit of foam

-“Focus Jeon, she’s just a chick...”

No wait

-“She’s just a woman. A woman who I respect, like I respect all women...”

-He’s been watching a lot of feminist theory on YouTube

-He likes staying educated  

-And also fuck the patriarchy

-The man waiting for his drink has arched a brow at this point, wondering if his barista has lost his mind

-“Uhhh medium...” he checks the cup for his awful hand writing, “ghostly toasted marshmallow latte!”

-“Thanks.” The guy mutters, throwing a judging look Jungkook's way  

-He gives him a lazy salute as the guy struts away with a briefcase in tow

-“Thaaanks.” Jungkook mocks him, his face scrunching up in annoyance  

-Stupid man

-With his stupid briefcase  

-As Jungkook is pulling out a batch of cream cheese frosting stuffed pumpkin muffins  

-Or as Jungkook calls them

-PUNK-in Muffins

-Movement at the counter catches his eye

-is that

-”oh shit...” He grunts, hastily wiping his hands on his apron and rushing over to the counter

-normally he would meander

-stroll

-or even slump to greet any new guests at this hour

-and by this hour

-he means 45 minutes before closing

-Jungkook’s bakery is open til midnight on weeknights

-9pm on Sundays

-and 3am on Saturdays (for the culture of course, gotta keep it spooky)

-tonight happens to be a Friday night and the person awaiting his assistance is

-you

-”You’re still here?” He gawks, the black polish on his nails glimmering as he punches in a few keys on the register

-You offer him a tired and slightly amused smile, “No. Y/N died around 4:30, you’re speaking to her ghost. Please leave your message after the tone.”

-Jungkook cracks a smile, his palms resting on flat on the counter, “Do ghosts check their voicemails?”

-“Oh of course not but, I will be checking yours because you have access to caffeine.”

-Jungkook laughs

-no...he giggles  

-and it’s fucking cute

-but you digress

-“I feel like I should cut you off...this is your 4th latte; I’m pretty sure you’re 80% caffeine at this point...”

-“Noooo, don’t do that.” You whine slumping against the counter, “I just need to finish this one page...”

-He quirks a brow as he scribbles something on your cup, unimpressed with your statement, “You said that three hours ago. I’ll make you another one but I’m not putting an extra shot in.”

-Your face turns up in protest but he click his tongue against his teeth , shaking a manicured finger at you

-“Ah ah- nope. I don’t want to hear it. You either take that or I’m making you a hot chocolate and shutting the buildings power off.”

-With a dramatic sigh, you concede

-“Ugh fine. Here-” You go to hand him your debit card but he shakes his head

-“Put that away.”

-You want to protest but given the fact that he’s made the rules thus far during this interaction, you doubt you’d be able to stop him.

-A smile appears on your face then, appreciative of his generosity

-“Thank you.”

-He merely grins, waving you off before rolling up the sleeves of his black Blink 182 shirt

-as soon as his tattoos are out

-all the moisture leaves your mouth

-you try your hardest not to stare at him

-expertly, he eases the espresso shots into the milk, tongue poking between his lips in concentration

-and you

-being sleep-deprived

-and a little loopy

-decide to  

-flirt????????

-if you could even call it that

-which you could but you shouldn’t

-“For the record, when I finally dig my way out of this of mountain of death I’m stuck in, I will definitely take you up on that hot chocolate...”

-Jungkook’s brow quirks at the tone of your voice, his hands suddenly itching with nerves

-was that

-was that flirty?

-should he flirt back?

-“My hot chocolate is legendary. You won’t be disappointed.” His lips display a small grin as he places the lid atop your finished latte, “Also mountain of death is a great name and I WILL be stealing it.”

-You giggle

-again

-“and I WILL be suing you for copyright.”

-He laughs now, wiping up the bit of milk he spilled

-the sinewy muscles in his forearm tensing and untensing

“Good luck getting me to show up to court.”

-and that’s kinda how it was between you and Jungkook

-for like six months

-it was a little bit flirty but never anything to push either over you over the edge.

-and speaking of being on edge

-recently, you had gone from vacationing in your timeshare on the edge

-to signing a 35 year mortgage contract  

-4 bedrooms

-2.5 bathrooms

-of pure

-unrelenting

-stress

-you could feel it in the middle of your back

-shoving itself up between your shoulder blades

-your body seemed to ache with it

-the worst part being

-it was Halloween

-You should be out with your friends, having fun

-wearing itchy costumes and drinking sugary drinks

-but instead, your headed towards the bakery to work

-Jungkook was behind the counter, smiling happily at a family dressed like the cast of scooby doo

-from what you could see he was wearing a skeleton onesie

-his jet black hair tousled perfectly above his head

-he looked adorable

-(and hot)

-He notices you instantly, his face turning up in surprise

-you offer up a small wave and head over to your table

-you know he’s going to say something about you being there but

-you don’t really have much of a choice

-this work has to be done

-it takes him a second to spot you but when he does

-he seems to perk up

-his smile brightening as he looks back towards his customer

-as you’re setting everything up, you feel a presence (not the spooky kind) at the end of your table

-it’s Jungkook and he has your regular order in one hand, along with something wrapped in skeleton-patterned parchment paper

-“I know, I know.” You acknowledge before he’s even able to chide you for being here

-He smirks “What are you doing studying on the holiest day of the year??”

-You giggle

-“The holiest day of the year huh?”

-“Of course. Halloween is the one night a year that the homies can dress like total -sluts and no one can say anything about it.”

-This makes you giggle again

-“And you went with slutty skeleton huh? I love it- it’s like as naked as you can possibly get.”

-He chuckles, gesturing to his costume

-His floppy black hair getting in his face

-“Damn right baby.”

-The way he grins tells you the pet name is a joke

-But the deepening of his voice gets to you anyway

-“Thank you for this. I promise I’ll get out of your hair early tonight.”

-“The only thing I’m worried about getting out of my hair is this white spray paint. You’re welcome to stay as long as you want.”

-He’s put a streak of white spray paint in his raven locks

-Why? You’re not certain

-Does it look good on him, like everything else does?

-Absolutely

-Its been a few hours since your night of studying began

-Jungkook’s dropped off two free lattes since you’ve arrived  

-As well as a slice of his ‘I write cinnamon not tragedies’ bread

-Which was equally hilarious and delicious

-You caught him glancing over at your table a few times but you didn’t think anything of it

-He’s probably just checking to make sure that no one needs your table

-His bakery is packed most nights but Halloween is a special night at Blackheart Bakery

-He has a trick or treat counter set up with free (homemade) candy

-A photo op complete with a fake haunted house backdrop

-A Halloween playlist

-And a bunch of discounts on his signature lattes and food

-you watch him amongst the chaos

-He is completely unfazed

-He seems elated at the amount of customers he has

-he grins and laughs at something a man dressed like Thor says at his counter

-he seems entirely in his element

-you realize that the denial tactics you’ve been trying out haven’t been working

-because this floppy haired, tattooed, slutty skeleton/baker kind of has a hold on your heart

-you’ve been friends for a long time now

-he always makes sure you’re taken care of

-he always asks if you’re ok

-he always gives you this little grin

-it feels like a secret sometimes

-but maybe it’s been his way of letting you know where he stands

-he’s been bringing you lattes and pastries for months now

-he never charges you full-price

-he always reminds you not to work too hard

-he

-fuck

-he likes you doesn’t he?

-you look back over at the counter to see him bending over and handing a skeleton cookie to a little girl dressed like Captain Marvel

-he laughs at something she says

-his eyes focused entirely on her and whatever she seems to be proclaiming to him  

-your heart goes wonky again

-alright

-enough is enough

-you’re doing this  

-Jungkook’s done so much of the work thus far

-it’s time for you to seal the deal

-and if he rejects you, well…

-you can just crawl into a hole and never come out again

-easy peasy

-You can feel his eyes on you as you get up to take your place in line

-luckily there isn’t anyone else behind you

-rejection with an audience would certainly be worse

-Jungkook has his witty comment ready for you as you approach the register

-“I know for a fact you haven’t finished your third latte and I’m not making you another one until-“

-“I’m not here for another latte.” You laugh, trying to ignore the thrashing of your heartbeat

-“No? Well, are you finally going to try my Welcome to the Blackened Chicken Parade Burger then? I’ve been asking you for like three weeks…”

-god he’s fucking cute

-“I’m here to ask you out.”

-Jungkook swears he feels his heart stop

-“You’re here to…”

-He repeats the first part of your response as his he didn’t hear you

-his black fingernails anxiously tapping against the countertop

-“I’m here to ask you out- on a date.”

-Jungkooks face seems to go through various stages of confusion before a shy smirk presents itself on his pretty mouth

-“Me? You’re asking me-“ He places a hand on his chest, “-out on a date?”

-“Yes!” You laugh, slapping the counter a bit too hard, your nerves getting the best of you, “Are you down?”

-He shakes his head but his answer contradicts his movements

-“So down, beyond down. There is no one on Earth who is more DOWN than I am. Yes. My answer is yes. 50000% yes.”

-you can’t help the smile on your lips

-“great. So are you free next Friday then?”

-He grins with his teeth this time, nodding emphatically  

-“Consider the shop closed.”

-and so it was

-you returned to your table moments later  

-feeling on top of the world

-you did it

-you asked Jungkook out

-and he said yes

-and now you

-NOW YOU HAVE A DATE WITH JUNGKOOK

-LOOK AT YOU GO

-TAKING CHARGE

-you try your best to engage with your studies but with Jungkook on your mind

-its really hard

-roughly two hours later, things at the bakery have finally started to slow down

-“Hey uh- Y/N?”

-Jungkook's voice that pulls you out of your studying trance

-he’s standing at the entrance of his back room, waving you over with his hand

-and who are you to deny him?

-you make your way over there, annoyed at the instant increase in your heartrate

-he stands awkwardly to the side and gestures to the boxes on the metal rack

-“I just remembered that I’ve never given you a tour of the place. I give all my regulars a tour of the stockroom and my office and uh-”

-he cuts himself off and clumsily cups your cheek

-he pulls you into a kiss

-a really good kiss

-his lips are so warm

-he smells like cinnamon

-you could literally die happy

-The ridiculous nature of his first attempt to kiss you, makes you giggle into his mouth

-you feel him smile, his hands smushing your cheeks together as he pulls away

-“Ok I lied. There is no tour. I’ve just been watching you focus on your computer for the last two hours and you’re just really fucking cute and-”

-this time, it’s you who cuts him off

-“You better give me an actual tour next time. How else am I going to steal your secret recipes?”

-he scoffs in mock offense

-“Ah ha! So that’s the only reason you asked me out huh? Should I be calling you Plankton instead of Y/N? Ew no wait- that would make me Mr. Krabs and he’s a dirty capitalist...”

-You laugh, “Oooh good point. Guess you’ll just have to be Karen, my computer wife.”

-This makes him laugh now and the sound warms your soul

-“I could live with that- I like your last name better anyways.”

-with another kiss, your adventure with the emo baker of your dreams begins

-It may have been Halloween but it sure felt like Christmas to you

#headcanonween #jungkook #Jungkook fluff #Jungkook bts #bts jungkook #Jungkook 2020 #emo! jungkook #boyfriend! jungkook #Jungkook fics #Jungkook fic recs #jungkook cute #Jungkook hot #tattoos jungkook #Jungkook tattoos #fluff #bts #bts fluff #bts fics #bts fanfic #bts fic recs

[mxvladdy]

I can't stress enough 'wows' in tve way you write along with the fact that it's you first few posts (i think? Pls correct me) can you do luci mammon and satan with a reader who takes naps bc of overthinking? They just tug their sleeves and shot them a tired look, while looking down shying away. Also, have a nice day and take the time to be yourself!

Aw thanks fam! I am fairly new to posting my works, I tried twice before this with two different writing blogs but I deleted them both bc I felt discouraged. I’m older now and I feel a lot better about my writing, so third time the charm and all that lol! I’m so glad you like my writing! I know I need some work on grammar and expanding my vocabulary.  

This was a super cute prompt ;.; I hope I did it justice!

Lucifer

He is a mix of jealous and pissed. He wishes he could fall asleep so easily when he gets inundated with too many things at once. But also- just don’t do that? Where were your manners?

He starts noticing your little peculiarity in class. Specifically that you tend to nod off in advance alchemy and rune scripting. You were being so studious, jotting down notes, ask great questions. Next thing he knows you're out like a light.

He is shocked for a moment before he will wake you up. Your wide doe-eyed frown does nothing to him. JK his hearts clench at your wounded look.

He makes the other brothers report to him about your behavior and odd sleep habit. Were you ill? Was this just something humans did? Devils, was Belphie rubbing off on you?

They all say the same thing. One moment you are working hard or talking to them about a topic you are passionate about, and the next you are yawning hard enough to pop your jaw and shyly asking to lay down.

Well-he can’t have that.

If you are going to fall asleep around anyone it’s going to be him.

He sets up remedial lessons with you after dinner to make up for the work slept through. You sit by him at his long ornate desk while he tutors you on what you missed.

You weren't having any problems,  you even finished a few pages. He is proud and then-

“I can almost hear those gears slowing my dear.” Lucifer interrupts himself mid-explanation of Zosimos of Panopolis and Maria the Prophetess's theories of alchemy in human medicine.

You jerk awake and turn to him blinking owlishly. "Yeah, I just need to lay down." You admit.

Lucifer eyes you critically. This was sudden, were you ill? You had been fine moments ago, bright-eyed and enthusiastic. He cups your face, turning it from side to side. "So suddenly? We haven't even discussed the properties of mercury yet." You hum letting your eyes droop. He was always so warm.

"Hour nap break? Please?" His stern gaze softens at how your nose scrunches up cutely as you yawn.

“Very well.” He relents letting you slick over to his couch. You flop over face first with a grunt of satisfaction. You toss and turn for a while, moving his pillows around unsatisfied.

“Luci-” You call in defeat. He ignores you at first. If you wanted to nap fine, he would get some work done in the meantime. “Luci~” You say again. You could see his brow twitching. “Lu-”

“My dear,” He shoots you a withering look. “You are treading a thin line. If you have the energy to call for me you have the energy to study.” You say nothing at his brisk tone, instead of opening your arms to him to join you. “You tempt me.” He purrs hiding his smile behind his paperwork.

“Learned from the best.” Lucifer shakes his head laughing at your smug reply. He glances over you to his grandfather clock. Hmmm-perhaps he could spare a few minutes. He rises elegantly discarding his tie and waistcoat to his abandoned chair. Running a hand through his hair he snorts at your little whistle.

“Move.” He commands. You shake your head patting your belly. “I will crush you.” He laughs but lays over you regardless.

“Good-you’re warm.” You say muffled in his shirt. Wrapping your arms around his middle you drift off. Lucifer holds you close, running a still gloved hand up and down your side. Perhaps he should bring out some more complex topics next time. If this was the outcome-

Mammon

He noticed you get drowsy before in class. Your cute little head jerks as you nod off, hands rubbing at your face as you fight to stay awake before giving in to the need to sleep. It was adorable- not that he was watching you because of that! He was just doing his job of looking out for you

Ye-that was all.

Honestly, he thought you were just like him. He never cared for the books being forced on him in class. Boring useless crap in his opinion. He much rather sleep through a lecture on stats too.

Now books on photography? That's where it's at. He has a legitimate passion for it.

He likes being behind the camera just as much as he likes being in front of it. Though he doesn't snap photos often.

He doesn't need more beratement from his brothers than he already gets. Sides, he just feels like they would look down at this like everything else he does.

He'll share his hobby with you though. You at least seem interested in it. He'll show you his collection of vintage to high-tech cameras and talk your ear off about the makes, models, and features.

You nod along and ask questions from time to time, smiling along with Mammon while he prattles on about color theory next to you on the floor.

He was just getting to Auguste Lumiére when he feels a gentle bump on his shoulder.

"O-oi!" Mammon starts, shaking his shoulder to rouse you. You look up at him, blinking the sleep from your eyes. "Was...was I that boring?" He deflates a little, all previous excitement gone in a flash. You had seemed so interested...

"What? Oh, no. No Mammon I'm sorry. It's really all fascinating," You grab for his sleeve so he couldn't run away. "It was just a lot of information all at once. I just got a bit overwhelmed."

"So you fall asleep?" He raises a brow not believing you for a second. Who falls asleep when something is interesting? He'll admit he's fallen asleep while listening to Levi talk about a new anime or Asmo with a make-up release.  But that's because it had been boring. "Is that like a human thing?"

You shrug snuggling closer. "I don't know- but it's a me thing. Give me five? I'd love to hear you talk more about your collection, promise."

Mammon glows scarlet at your words. "Of course you do!" He puffs out his chest excitedly. “I got great taste.” You nod into his shirt before drifting off again. He tilts his head slightly to look at you chuckling internally when your breathing and heartbeat slow down. Damn, out in seconds. Well, better get comfortable.

Uncrossing his long legs he picks up the camera he had been showing you. The old Polaroid lens reflects his face back at him. He remembered the day Land had debuted this marvel of engineering. He just had had to get his hands on one. It was useless now, he had much better quality cameras than this old thing, but he remembered you reminiscing about your human friends and their portable camera. Would you take some pictures with him too? He would take one now, but the sound of the flash would definitely wake you up.

He fiddles with it for a few more minutes, opening and closing the film canister and checking for any parts that needed fixing as he waits. You stir at his side a few minutes later with a little mew of satisfaction. Mammon hears your joints creak and pop as you stretch. "Morning." He says sarcastically, earning himself a light punch to his shoulder. "Ready to continue?"

You nod eagerly, perky and aware. At least for the moment.

Satan

He didn't really notice at first the pattern of your behavior.

You would come over for book club. Which was really just him reading his current novel and you picking something at random to gain a little random knowledge.

You would find a comfortable position on his bed, curl up nice and small and read. Then after a bit yawn and start to snooze.

He first thought it was the atmosphere of his room. It was quiet, warm, and the sound of flickering candles and the rustle of paper sometimes caused him to doze too.

But when it starts happening outside of class he notices.

Hmmm….this is new.

He looks it up in his human anatomy books and finds nothing.

He's not particularly worried about you per se. You always bounce back quickly after a quick snooze.

Then you start dozing when he is talking… >:(

Like his brother/dad he is a little miffed at first but then your behavior reminds him a cat and he loves you 10x harder now

Satan stops in his pacing of the back gardens. His book of poetry hanging limply in his hand. He had been reciting some of the most fascinating lines of work from Lord Byron's later works and wanted a human's perspective. He had thought you were interested. You never complained before when he asked you out here. Perhaps you were just being polite all those times before. Anything to soothe wrath. He snaps his book shut sharply, take some perverse satisfaction in the way you start out of your light sleep at the noise.

"Why'd you stop?" You ask wiping at your face.

"No point talking to someone that doesn't wish to listen." He snaps tersely.

"Oh-Satan, no I was listening. It...it just got to be so much so fast." You flush. “You had some great points going, I just needed a minute.” He watches your eyes grow heavy again, and it dawns on him.

"Do you just sleep when overwhelmed?" He asks incredulously. In all his years with humans, this was new. You shrug making grabby hands for him to move closer. He scoffs but moves into your space. You grab at the hem of his shirt and pull him down to sit next to you. He goes willingly getting comfortable by your side. You eye his lap longingly, hands clutching around his coat sleeve. “Fine-” He rolls his eyes. “Come here you odd thing.” You smile in triumph and crawl into his lap. Once settled you nuzzle into his warm chest.

“Wake me up in ten? I want to hear more about your conversations with Byron.”

“I’ll hold you to it.” He kisses the top of your forehead, opening his book to read again with one hand. You hum at his soft kiss, returning it sleepily with one of your own before passing out again. Ten minutes go by in an instant and Satan looks down at your peaceful face. He smiles to himself, perhaps he’ll let you sleep for a little while longer. You’d need it for his next point.  

#obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me satan #obey me prompts #cute!

[craftypeaceturtle]

Distanced, part 1

Summary: A group chat fic! How shall these useless students cope with daily life.

Note: This is my first attempt at anything even remotely like this! I have no idea how this will turn out so feedback is greatly appreciated! Intrulogical. 

Next part here!!

.

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Tuesday, 16:15

Hello. This is Logan Sanders from Prof. Smith’s seminar. Do you have any suggestions for how we should go about completing the upcoming assessment?

Remus Prince: who dis

I literally just stated it. Logan Sanders.

I wear the tie.

Remus Prince: OHHH

Remus Prince: Well 1stly

Remus Prince: What’s the best planet in the solar system?

Pardon?

Remus Prince: i LitERaLlY JuSt stAtED iT

That has nothing to do with anything, we just need to get through this project.

Remus Prince: if u want to work then u have to answer

Jupiter. 

Remus Prince: cool.

Remus Prince: You’ll do.

Remus Prince: My name is Remus.

I know. We did actually swap phone numbers. We in fact discussed which topic we would be doing for over fifteen minutes in the seminar. So we have indeed met. If you continue to be obnoxious then this will be a easier project. 

.

MESSAGES: To Remus Sanders (Presentation)

Tuesday, 16:22

Why did you ask that question?

 Remus Prince: I asked my brother that question and he answered earth

Remus Prince: I’ve had trust issues ever since

Roman’s favourite planet is Earth? 

 Remus Prince: HAH

Remus Prince: ye he’s an idiot

Remus Prince: I’ve gotta test everyone now.

Remus Prince: You passed btw

Remus Prince: WAIT!

Remus Prince: Do u know Ro?

Yes, he is my friend and roommate. 

Remus Prince: What was ur name again????????

You can literally scroll up and reread it. I refuse. You got into university for a reason and so you can manage my name.

Remus Prince: jk

Okay then. Do you want to discuss how we should go about creating this powerpoint?

Remus Prince: what’s there to ‘discuss’?

We can separately conduct our research however it is regrettably better to meet up in person to practise not only giving the presentation but also the construction of the presentation itself.

Remus Prince: man you just love sending essays huh

I have written out longer messages. I don’t understand the point of sending a sentence at a time and risk getting interrupted. Plus at least my texting doesn’t seem all like an assault of constant notifications. 

Remus Prince: fair

Shall we say that we should aim to get our presentation research finished by two weeks (15th). That leaves us another two weeks to construct the powerpoint, gather more research if necessary, then practise presenting. 

Remus Prince: k

GROUPCHAT: Goths, Emos, and Remus

Tuesday, 16:26

Octopussy: can I vent for a sec

Octopussy: So! I’m just sitting here. Y’know. Vibing. 

Octopussy: Then out of nowhere the nerd from my class starts messaging me about the group project that’s due a month away

Octopussy: like wtf

Octopussy: nice to know the nerd thing isn’t just appearance

Vigilant: help

Octopussy: he made a big deal about meeting up as well to do this!

Octopussy: No one in the class even cares!

Octopussy: No one is even remotely

Octopussy: Not even close

Octopussy: To thinking about that project right now!

Octopussy: We’ve got ages!

Vigilant: oh sweet jesus

Octopussy: Like! We’ve got a month!

Octopussy: AN ENTIRE MONTH

Octopussy: Like he also wants to meet up as well to practise

Octopus: Like ew.

Top-Hat-Gay: Are you done?

Octopussy: ye

Octopussy: he’s a dick

Vigilant: oh thank god

Top-Hat-Gay: Ha, as if you believe in god.

Vigilant: If it stops Re from not spamming us then I’ll believe whatever. 

Octopussy: rude

Vigilant: bitch

Top-Hat-Gay: On an actually important note, which one of you last used my nail bag?

Octopussy: me!

Octopussy: you need more green 

Top-Hat-Gay: No I fucking don’t!

Top-Hat-Gay: There was an entirely new bottle in there!

Octopussy: I said what I said.

Top-Hat-Gay: I hate you. 

Octopussy: Thank bby

Octopussy: ALSO!

Octopussy: I found out the nerd also lives with Ro.

Top-Hat-Gay: So?

Vigilant: hE’S FORBIDDEN

Top-Hat-Gay: Wait so the nerd is Logan?

Octopussy: He is!

Octopussy: not that it seems to be having any effect on Ro. he’s as dense as a brick.

Top-Hat-Gay: I saw him today going into Remy’s. 

Vigilant: Why are we even talking about him

Vigilant: Like who gives a shit.

Octopussy: dunno

Octopussy: just thought it was weird

Top-Hat-Gay: Maybe you should switch partners. Especially if he wants to meet up at some point.

Octopussy: nah

Octopussy: not worth it

Top-Hat-Gay: A teacher wouldn’t care. They only want to see good grades. They won’t mind moving stuff around for you.

Octopussy: He seems harmless. 

Vigilant: you literally called him a dick after one conversation.

Octopussy: he is a dick

Octopussy: he seems stuffy but just a nerd through and through. He’s not going to be a prick or anything.

Vigilant: This isn’t really about him. He already got you talking about you know who in your first ever conversation. Maybe you shouldn’t hang around him.

Octopussy: I just thought it was interesting

Octopussy: It doesn’t mean jack shit

Octopussy: Not everything I talk about has some grand meaning.

Octopussy: I just thought it was weird that this nerd I share my classes with also lives with my bro. 

Top-Hat-Gay: And that’s perfectly fine Re.

Octopussy: soz V

Octopussy: didn’t mean to blow up in your face

Octopussy: just annoying to feel psycho-analysed 

Vigilant: soz

Octopussy: okay! 

Octopussy: that’s proof enough!

Octopussy: we can behave to each other so ice cream plz!!!!!!!!!!!

Top-Hat-Gay: JESUS CHRIST I SAID THAT AS A JOKE LAST YEAR

Octopussy: I will eat V’s posters unless you give us reward good boy icecream

Vigilant: chocolate pls

Top-Hat-Gay: jesus do you lot know how long it takes for me to put on my cape to go shopping

Vigilant: yes

Vigilant: we are precisely aware of exactly how long it takes

Vigilant: that’s why we don’t go shopping with you

GROUPCHAT: THE FAM ILY

Tuesday, 16:38

Pat-on-the-back: Heya guys, are we all in for dinner tonight?

Logan.S: I am.

YourHopesandDreams: I will be in at 7. If you could be so compassionate to push your meal back until then, I would be truly indebted to you.

Pat-on-the-back:  Fine by me!

Logan.S: I am agreeable.

Pat-on-the-back: Also Lo! Are you finished with your work?

Logan.S: I have finished my to-do list so I am available if I’m needed. 

Pat-on-the-back: No, you’re all good! I just wanted to check. It sounded like you were doing work for like four hours straight.

Logan.S: It took three hours thank you very much. 

Logan.S: So what are we doing for dinner?

Pat-on-the-back: I was thinking lasagne! 

Pat-on-the-back: also! Don’t think I’ll notice that change in topic!

Pat-on-the-back: I thought we all agreed on two hour stretches of work with a 15 min break at least. I mean... it’s even written on our calendar! There’s no way you forgot, did you Mister! 

Logan.S: It’s fine Pat.

Logan.S: Just let it go

Logan.S: I needed to get it done

Logan.S: I don’t need to be babied. 

Logan.S: I’m taking a break now. I’m okay.

Pat-on-the-back: I know, I’m sorry. I just want to make sure. As long as you feel okay then everything’s alright! How was your work anyway?

Logan.S: Fairly ordinary actually. I had to go through some of my notes and rewrite a couple of pages then I had to organise a group project due the 2nd of March. 

Pat-on-the-back: Sounds productive!

Logan.S: Thank you.

YourHopesandDreams: Ew. Group project. Who’s your partner?

Logan.S: We are in entirely different courses, why do you think you would know them?

YourHopesandDreams: Everyone knows the drama students know everyone. 

Logan.S: I’m working with Remus.

YourHopesandDreams: You should ask to swap partners. 

Logan.S: I won’t do so unless I have a genuine reason. I’ve not had any interactions with him previously and while he did seem half-hearted and obnoxious in his messages, he seems harmless. If he messes everything around then I will but I won’t make a fuss unless I have reason to.

Pat-on-the-back: That’s fair but please make sure to tell us if he pulls anything.

YourHopesandDreams: Your loss. 

.

MESSAGES: To Nerd

Wednesday, 3:02

hey u awake

Nerd: What on earth are you doing up at 3am? 

Oh

Soz

Wrong number.

MESSAGES: To Nerd

Wednesday, 3:12

Nerd: What is your favourite planet?

wha

Nerd: I figured it would be fair to ask your test to you. For all I know you could be as uncultured as your brother.

can we not talk about him

I dunno really

I wanna say pluto because they deserve it

but I kinda like saturn best.

Nerd: Any reason why?

Just kinda interesting

Big, lots a moons, ring. 

It’s just a cool planet. 

Nerd: Fair enough.

Do you have a reason to like jupiter?

Nerd: If I’m being honest, my science teacher absolutely adored Jupiter. I don’t know why but that memory of him ranting about how cool it was just really stuck with me. I was only about 8 years old. But I found myself agreeing with him. Back then my fascination was a lot more childish. I thought it was fascinating that since Jupiter was a gas planet it hadn’t been blown away yet. I grew up from that view but the interest never left.

ew that was almost cute.

Nerd: I concur that was very unprofessional.

WAIT

WAIT

HOLD ON

Why hasn’t Jupiter blown away!?!?!?!?!??

Nerd: Excuse me?

8YR OLD YOU IS A GENUIS 

Nerd: There’s no atmosphere in space!

But there’s pressure and junk isn’t there? 

Nerd: The pressure is pulling the mass into the centre which keeps the planet whole.

Do you think we could step on Jupiter?

Nerd: I don’t know.

I thought you knew space!

Nerd: I do biology! To get into a biology degree, I did a bunch of biology based subjects! Why would I know anything about space?

I dunno.

I guess if you look like a nerd people just presume.

Nerd: I’ve personally found it’s the confidence. If you act confident enough then everyone presumes you know exactly what you’re doing and you’re in control, no matter how out of place you look. 

I’ll drink to that!

Wait, in what situation would you have learnt this!?!

Nerd: I have a bad habit of accidentally going to the wrong class and just going along with it rather than anything else. Although I should say I did fantastic in that architectural history class. But this habit has caused some awkward situations. I have also impersonated a store manager to explain why me and my friend were there when really he ran into the warehouse searching for a kitten. 

HAH

That’s brilliant

Using your nerdy powers to overthrow society.

Does this mean you’re a liar?

Nerd: I call it ‘managing life’. 

HAH

Sounds about right.

Why are you awake at this time?

Nerd: I could ask you that.

#sanders sides #logan sanders #remus sanders #My writing #roman sanders #patton sanders #Janus Sanders #deceit sanders #virgil sanders #group chat fic #fluff

[tchallasbabymama]

M’Baku’s Love- Chapter 8

Hey y’all, so um...let just pretend there were a few years between Black Panther and Infinity War. K? Check out my masterlist HERE to catch up and check out my other stories. FYI, when this one finishes I’ll be starting up “Ménage `a Trois”, a T’Challa x  OC x M’Baku throuple fic. Check out the preview here!

As usual, let me know if you want to be tagged in anything (even though my tags don’t seem to be working right now😒.)

Enjoy!

CW: Smut, Infinity War spoilers...kind of? 

Word Count: 5,719

Monday morning at the Outreach Center, Monae and M’Baku were the main topic of conversation. People had always speculated about the two, but seeing them leave the gala together was kindling for the gossip flames. Before they even arrived word had already gotten around about them, but when the volunteers saw them pull up together it spread like wildfire. 

“You think they know?”

“I do not know, nor do I care,” he leaned down and kissed her cheek as they entered the building, coming face to face with Neicey. “Ah, Neicey...how are you today?”

“I’ve been better,” she eyed Monae with a smirk, “but I see you don’t waste any time.”

“Yes, well-”

“No need. Y’all are cute together, by the way.” she said as she sauntered off towards her classroom.

“Well that was uneventful,” Monae said under her breath and M’Baku playfully nudged her as they walked up the stairs to the third floor and he gave her yet another kiss as they separated to go to their respective offices on opposite sides of the Center. When Monae reached her office and turned the doorknob she was met with the sight of dozens of white roses. She wanted to run down the hall, jump on M’Baku, and kiss all over his handsome face, but had to remain professional while at work. She set her stuff down and picked up the card from the bouquet on her desk.

“When did he even have time to do this?” she mused to herself out loud.

She opened the card and the smile on her face grew twice as big.

“A mountain of snow-white flowers from your favorite Jabari chief.”

She held the card to her chest and sighed before moving a couple of the bouquets around to get to her desk. She settled in for the day, but got almost nothing done because she kept looking at the clock, waiting until lunchtime to see her man.

M’Baku was just as distracted in his office as Deontae tried to hold his attention on the task at hand.

“M’Baku, hello?”

“I am sorry, please continue,” he shook himself from his daze.

“That’s the third time you’ve done that in the last five minutes. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong,” a smirk creeped up on his face before he could tamp it back down.

“Mmmhm, if you say so,” Deontae side-eyed him and kept shuffling through papers, looking up at M’Baku from time to time to catch him staring off in the distance with a half-smile on his face.

When noon came around he jumped up from his desk and almost ran over Deontae on his way out the door. He made his way down the hall until he got to the art wing of the center. There she was, his love, coming out of her office just as he rounded the corner.

Their eyes met and he pulled her in for a quick kiss before grabbing her hand and walking her towards the stairs and down to the first floor.

“What are we having today?”

“Sushi? I’ve been craving fish and there’s that one place you like with the veggie rolls.”

“Sushi it is, then. How has your day been…” he trailed off at the sight of Deontae with his mouth wide open.

“I knew something was up with you,” he said excitedly, happy to have been right. “So this is a thing now?” He gestured between the two of them and smiled.

“Yeah it’s a thing,” Monae wlooked up at M’Baku and they smiled at each other. He put his arm around her shoulder and kissed her temple, pulling her in close.

“Awww, y’all are cute...and reminding me I’m tragically single,” he sighed, putting his head back down into his tablet and bidding them adieu, shuffling back in the direction he came from.

By the time the two got back from lunch, the whole Outreach Center was abuzz with the news of the new couple. So much so that when M’Baku visited her classroom before the end of the day, even the kids knew, though they always suspected. 

As the days passed by, M’Baku and Monae formed a routine. He basically moved into her apartment and every morning they would wake up and have slow and steamy “good morning” sex before showering and cooking breakfast together. They’d arrive at work and go their separate ways before meeting up for lunch around noon, then he would stop by her class before the end of the day. Every time, the kids greeted him with their bright, snaggletoothed smiles and a chorus of “Hiiii Mr. M’Baku!” before he took his place in the back of the class and watched her do her thing. Every now and then Kehinde would ask M’Baku to sub in for him on the drums and he’d gladly oblige. After class, they’d go home to her apartment and one of them would cook for the other or they’d order in. Their nights were spent either passed out on the couch with the tv watching them, or staying up all hours exploring each other’s bodies. 

She kept the thermostat low for him, but he noticed she looked uncomfortable all bundled up around the apartment in her fuzzy socks and old college hoodie, so he turned it back up for her one day while she was out running errands. When she came home and felt the temperature, she was worried that he was maybe sick or something, but when he explained the change to her she had to take some time to compose herself upon realizing just how much he cared for her. After a few days, he got used to the sparing use of the air conditioner. Especially since the warmer it was, the less clothing she wore around the apartment, and he loved seeing her in little skimpy outfits or nothing at all. Even when it wasn’t sexual, the sight of her body warmed him from the inside out.

They even got to know each other’s families. M’Baku called his mother, Ada, once or twice a week to check in, and one day Monae loudly ran into the room fussing to him about some dance competition show kicking off the best contestant and Ada heard everything. She was tickled by her vivaciousness and the two of them spoke on the phone. Now every time M’Baku calls his mama she wants to speak to Monae. She was quickly becoming her favorite and it only slightly annoyed M’Baku.

A month into their relationship, Monae’s sister Jazz came to visit and he moved back into his place for the weekend so as not to crowd the small apartment. Neither one of them got much sleep, both missing the feeling of their lover’s body pressed up against theirs through the night. Jazz and M’Baku got along great, though, and Monae often caught herself wondering what it would be like if the three of them could be one small happy family. She shook the thought out of her head every time, reminding herself of his duty to his people. 

Their relationship wasn’t all sunshine and roses, though. Monae had a nasty habit of pulling away from him at times when she got sad thinking about his eventual departure, but that always came to an end when M’Baku fucked the attitude right out of her. He tried his best to not think about leaving, even though the date grew closer and closer, but it constantly crossed his mind. He was just better at hiding it. 

Almost every night they laid curled up in bed, talking the night away and stealing every last second they could with each other, but for some reason this night was different. When she climbed off his still throbbing dick and plopped down next to him, he could tell something was bothering her.

“What is it, my love?”

She looked at him with the saddest eyes he had ever seen.

“That right there. ‘My love’,” a single tear rolled down her cheek and he reached out to wipe it away, but she turned her face away from him as more tears appeared.

M’Baku sat up against the headboard, already aware of where her mind was. He was there too. They only had a week left and both of them wished they could stop time to avoid the inevitable, but it was coming fast.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to cry-”

“Babygirl, it is ok to cry about it,” his voice cracked and she looked up to see tears threatening to fall from his eyes. She curled up on his lap and the two of them sobbed into each other for what felt like hours.

“Do you...do you think you’ll come visit the Center?”

“I do not think I will be able to make it often, but I will visit when I can,” he kissed her temple and rested his cheek against the top of her head as she sniffled. 

“Y-you’ll have to get married to some beautiful warrior princess and she’ll give you a bunch of big ass Jabari babies-”

He chuckled and she smiled at him before her face turned sad again.

“I don’t want you to forget me, but I know you’ll have to.”

“I could never forget you, Monae,” he tilted her chin up towards him and kissed her lips softly. She pulled back and stared into his big brown eyes, reddened from his tears.

“M’Baku, I need you to do something for me…”

“Anything, my love,” he pecked her lips.

“I-I can’t see you off...I can’t wave goodbye while you take off in the Talon, I don’t think I can do it. I need you to be ok with that, I can’t watch you leave me.”

He nodded in understanding and wiped her tears.

“I understand, babygirl.”

He stroked her hair softly and the two of them stayed silently cuddled up all night, until they drifted off to sleep.

--------

“A little higher on the left, Rodney,” Monae instructed and she stood back, looking at the banner the kids had painted for M’Baku’s going away party. He adjusted his side and she took another look at it, giving him a thumbs up. “Perfect!”

Rodney hopped down off the step ladder and dusted his hands off before taking a look at the banner, himself.

“You know, he’s gonna love it,” he said, turning to Monae and flashing his adorable crooked smile. She wanted to smile back, but the most she could muster was a lazy smirk. She was still worried about making sure every little thing was in place for his going away party, but she knew he’d love it. Some of the older kids had drawn “We’ll miss you, M’Baku!” in graffiti on the banner and the younger kids had added their colorful handprints.

“I hope so,” she whispered under her breath and let out a sigh. 

“Rod’s right, you gotta relax Monae,” N’Jadaka came up on her other side.

“I just want it to be perfect for him, is that a crime?”

“No, but you know he’s a simple man. It’s the thought that counts and you’ve really put your heart into this,” he said as he watched the kids rehearse their choreographed Jabari dance. Their faux fur-accented costumes looked so cute and Monae had a few volunteers and other instructors to thank for doing such a good job on them. N’Jadaka’s eyes met hers and he grinned, “You know he’s gonna miss the fuck out of you, right?”

“Yeah I know.”

There was silence for a moment before N’Jadaka cleared his throat.

“Anyways, just give me the signal and I’ll go grab him and bring him down here,” he said before walking away to sneak a snack from the refreshment table.

Monae smiled warmly thinking about the royal family’s willingness to help her plan M’Baku’s going away party and how they helped keep him busy over the past week to keep him from finding out about Monae’s surprise. She shook herself out of her thoughts for a moment to do one final check of the party before she had N'Jadaka go retrieve M’Baku. 

The vegetarian-friendly snack table was fully stocked despite the prince’s best efforts, and the kids’ mountain range and gorilla-themed art hung proudly on the walls. Volunteers, staff, and some kids and their families had gathered at the Center after hours to say goodbye to M’Baku who had quickly become a favorite among the kids and adults alike. 

“Ok,” she took a deep breath, “I think we’re ready...I think I’m ready.”

She went to go find N’Jadaka and let him know it was time, and the prince disappeared to go collect M’Baku. He texted her when they were almost back and she queued up Rodney and Kehinde on the drums. M’Baku walked in the room to see  her leading kids of all ages in a Jabari dance he had taught her. His smile was so big it probably reflected all the way to Jabari Land, and a tear came to his eye as he took in the banner above their heads. He watched as Monae and the kids’ feet stomped in rhythm to the drums and as the performance came to an end he was the first to applaud, clapping harder than everyone in the room. He went over and lifted her in his arms, spinning her around and planting a kiss on her lips, ignoring the chorus of “ewwwwww” coming from most of the kids and “awwwww” from most of the adults. When he put her back down she wiped away the tears that had escaped from his sad eyes.

“I’m glad you like it,” she smiled warmly at him, biting her bottom lip.

“I love it,” he kissed her again.

“I have a gift for you when we get home.”

“This was not enough?” he laughed and she playfully slapped his strong chest.

“No it wasn’t. I think you’ll like that one too.”

“I am sure I will love it,” he kissed her nose before they separated to give other people the chance to say goodbye to him too. She brought him a plate from the refreshment table and he kissed her cheek to say thank you while he spoke to some of the parents he met several weeks ago at the Open House. He had made quite the impression on a lot of people and those people all wanted to tell him goodbye, so the party went pretty late. As the numbers dwindled Monae started to clean up the space before a voice interrupted her.

“Why don’t you let us handle it?” Shuri offered, seemingly coming from out of nowhere with her cousin begrudgingly following behind her.

“Are you sure?” Monae was hesitant since this whole mess was her idea in the first place.

“Monae, go be with your man, we can handle this,” said the princess, taking the trash bag from her hand without waiting for a response.

Monae smiled at Shuri and thanked her before sauntering back over to M’Baku as the last person left the party.

“Ready to go?”

“More than ready, talking to so many people is exhausting.”

She giggled and they made their way back to her apartment, stealing glances and kisses whenever they could on the car ride home. When they got to her apartment he attacked her mouth with his and pushed her back against the door.

“Thank you. You did not have to do all of that, but you did and it was beautiful. Seeing you dancing like that turned me on so much,” he buried his head in the crook of her neck and kissed her softly before licking a stripe up to her ear and biting her earlobe. She let out a whimper before weaseling out of his grasp, making his eyebrows furrow. 

“Uh-unh, not yet Daddy.” She dipped into the second bedroom, that she had turned into her work space, and returned with a large gift-wrapped box that looked to have some weight to it. When she set it down on the kitchen table he looked at her questioningly. “Don’t just stare at it,” she laughed and pulled out her phone to record him. 

He tore at the paper and ripped the tape from the box before opening it. When he saw the contents more tears came to his eyes. She had given him her copies of all the books from their “Captain America Lists” plus a couple of her favorites.

“I thought you’d like my old beat-up books since they have my notes and scribbles in the margins. It’ll be like we’re reading together.”

He reached his hand out for her and she took it, intertwining their fingers as he pulled her into him for a hungry kiss.

“I love it, thank you Babygirl.”

Her hands rested on his chest as his arms circled her waist before their foreheads connected and they began swaying from side to side. He started humming and she recognized the song, but couldn’t quite place it.

“What is that? It sounds familiar,” she said, resting her head where her hands were and moving her hands to around his broad shoulders.

“Remember Nia’s party?”

“Mhm.”

“It is the song we danced to in the hallway outside her apartment, I looked up the lyrics and found it online. It is ‘Collide’  by EarthGang and Tiana Major9.”

She beamed against his chest, “I love it.”

M’Baku tilted her head up towards his and looked her head in her eyes, “And I love you.”

“I love you, too...more than anything.”

Their lips met in yet another hungry kiss and she jumped into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist as he carried her to the bedroom. He carefully laid her down and kissed down her body before she brought his face back up to hers.

“I want you inside me.”

He obliged, undressing himself slowly and watching as she did the same. When their lips met again he climbed on top of her and slowly pushed her back into the pillows. His fingers traced her lower lips and found their way inside her, getting her ready for him until she grabbed his wrist and shook her head.

“Now.”

M’Baku lined himself up with her opening and slowly slid in until he was fully sheathed inside her. Neither one of them moved, imprinting the feel of the other into their brains and bodies forever. When their hips both started to roll into each other slowly they both moaned in unison and he pulled his dick most of the way out before entering her again as deep as he could. He did this over and over, rolling his hips and hitting that spot in the back of Monae’s pussy that made her mind go numb.

“M’Baku, baby,” she moaned as she felt him deep in her soul and he growled into her upon hearing the way his name tumbled from her lips, picking up the pace but still digging impossibly deep inside her. “Oooh Daddy, you’re so deep.”

She wrapped her legs around his waist, not wanting to ever let him go as he grinded his hips into hers, making tears fall from her eyes from both pleasure and sorrow. He kissed them away and continued to rock her world. 

“I-I’m-”

“Mhm, I can feel it, come for me,” he leaned in and whispered in her ear, “Cum for your chief.”

That sent her over the edge and the tingling feeling she felt in her pussy gave way to a flood as her body tensed and released. She pulled him in deeper and her nails clawed at his back as she spasmed beneath him. Feeling her contracting around him almost sent him over the edge with her, but he wasn’t done with her yet. She released her legs and he pulled out, immediately diving between her legs to clean up her mess. The moan she let out was so loud it had to have woken up the neighbors, but his tongue continued to circle her overstimulated clit until he latched his lips around it and she came in his mouth. He tongued her into one more orgasm before flipping her over and raising her hips. She stuck her ass out for him and he wasted no time getting back inside her. 

This time he wasn't so gentle. He grabbed her throat, pulling her back into him, deepening the arch in her back until she lifted completely from the bed and leaned back into his chest as he gave it to her good. One of his strong hands pulled her hips back into his as he whispered sweet, filthy nothings into her ear.

“I love you, Monae.”

“I love how you feel around me.”

“I love how you say my name when I hit this spot right here.”

“M’Baku!” she yelled as his hips dug deep and his dick hit right where he said he would.

“Mhm, just like that.” 

She stroked the back of his head as his left hand came up and around to play with her nipples before trailing down and rubbing circles over her clit.

“Cum again.”

And she did, over and over throughout the night. He somehow held off, and it wasn’t until she took control and lowered her ample hips onto his dick that he began to feel his composure slipping away. She bounced herself up and down, flexing her kegel muscles around him and paying special attention to the tip of his dick before corkscrewing her hips down so that they met pelvis-to-pelvis. M’Baku let himself go and succumbed to her charms, moaning her name as he released deep inside her. Her hips still moved in circles, draining him of every last drop as she leaned down to lock lips with him. Their kiss was slow and deep and her hips continued to wind on him, pulling whimpers out of him that she had never heard before.

“Monae, please,” he begged, which only egged her on more. She hopped off his dick slowly, tightening her pussy walls on the way up just to fuck with him, and dropped to her knees before taking his throbbing dick into her mouth.

“Ah, fuck!” his legs shook and he came again down her throat as she sucked him dry, jaws working overtime to incapacitate him. Once she was satisfied, she reached her hand out to him and he sat up, disoriented from his orgasm. 

“You ok?” she giggled.

“Yeah, yeah, I am...girl you almost killed me,” he said with a laugh, which she joined in on as she sashayed into the bathroom to turn on the shower. They both got in and scrubbed down before M’Baku took it upon himself to eat her pussy again, wanting to taste her one last time. Monae was thankful that the water hid her tears as she held onto the back of his head, wishing she could feel this feeling forever, but knowing their time was at an end. When she came she burst into tears and without a word he finished cleaning her up before carrying her from the shower. He dried her off and lotioned her up before sliding one of his t-shirts over her head.

She sniffled and looked up at him as he cared for her with tears in his eyes, too proud to fall at this moment. She placed her hand on his face and the dam broke, sending tear after tear from his eyes.

She returned his favor by getting him ready for bed as they both cried and sniffled before crawling into bed and curling up with each other. She buried her face into his chest and swung her leg across his body while he ran his fingers over her hair and his other hand traced symbols of love and protection into her thigh. They both silently prayed over each other, wishing the other to find happiness, before dreamland confiscated their consciousnesses. 

Monae could barely sleep, instead choosing to stay awake and listen to his soft snores. Around 6am he started to stir as usual, so she closed her eyes and pretended to still be asleep when he carefully unwrapped her arm and leg from around him. He slid from under her and sat on the side of the bed just staring at her face as she breathed in and out. He got up momentarily and pulled something from the drawer he kept his things in, which had been emptied out a couple days ago with the exception of a couple things Monae wanted to keep. She felt him sit on the end of the bed and heard the sounds of a pen on paper. It took everything in her to not open her eyes and say something, but she had told him she couldn’t watch him leave and she still couldn't even though her lack of sleep forced her to hear him leave her instead.

He finished scribbling on the paper and placed it on his pillow before leaning over and lightly kissing her forehead so as not to wake her. It took all of Monae’s strength to keep her tears from falling as he walked across the room and shut the door behind him. She opened her eyes and stared at the paper beside her as she heard him sniffling in the hallway. She heard Juju meow and he let out a little laugh as he reached down to say goodbye to her.

“Take good care of her for me,” he said to the cat, who purred at him as he scratched her head. 

She heard him pick up his bags and it wasn't until the front door closed behind him that she allowed herself to break down. Tears flowed from her eyes as she sat up in bed and held her knees to her chest, wailing as she finally allowed herself to feel the pain of him leaving her. She wasn’t sure if she’d ever see him again, but even if she did he could never be her M’Baku again. He’d have to be Lord M’Baku, Chief of the Jabari, Husband to _____. He’d have to produce heirs and she would just have to go on about her daily life like she never fell in love with the Great Gorilla. She curled up into a ball and reached for his note to read it as best she could in the sliver of sunlight that shone into the room, when she noticed something roll off the pillow onto the bed. It was a small ring made of Jabari wood that was just the right size for her, so she slid it onto her ring finger as she looked down at the note.

My Chieftess,

I am sorry for leaving you this way, but I cannot say goodbye to you either. I really do not know what to say here other than I love you and I always will. I will miss you with my whole heart, Monae, but you will always have a piece of me with you. This ring is an exact replica of my chief ring, but in your size. Wear it and think of me, as I will think of you every time I look at mine.

Until we meet again…

Yours always,

M’Baku

Her eyes overflowed with tears and her body jerked as she sobbed even more, careful to not cry on the page that she’d keep forever. She stared at the ring on her finger and felt like she was floating among the clouds with him instead of being dragged down by the weight of it like her previous ring from the nonfactor named Derrick. Looking back, she couldn’t believe she thought that was love, but now she knew what real love felt like and she could never go back. Though it was hard to picture herself with someone else, she knew it would probably happen one day, so she silently thanked her big mountain man for teaching her how she deserved to be loved. 

--------

Two months passed by and M’Baku still could not get her out of his head, even as the council paraded eligible bachelorettes in front of him on a daily basis. Ada said nothing because she knew of the situation, but she also knew M’Baku was well aware he would have to pick a wife soon. Most days he sat on his throne with a pout on his face, barely listening to whatever the current discussion was and daydreaming of his love.

Monae wasn’t doing much better, but the kids knew why she was sad and did everything they could to cheer her up. Of course their smiles made her happy in the moment, but when she went home to her apartment it just felt empty and sad. She had been toying around with the idea of visiting her great aunt, Sarah, back home for a change of scenery and finally decided she’d take off for a couple weeks to get her head back on straight. 

The Outreach Center was running just fine, even though M’Baku’s presence was missed, until one day N’Jadaka and Shuri were called back to Wakanda for an emergency. T’Challa had Nakia stay in Oakland because someone had to run the Center in their absence, but Monae secretly wondered if it was more for her safety than anything. She had asked Nakia what was going on, but even the queen of Wakanda had no idea. Monae closed her eyes and said a quick prayer for her friends and her love to stay safe, but when she opened her eyes the sight before her shook her to her core. 

Children and workers were disintegrating before her eyes and screams rang out among the untouched. Monae reached out to grab a volunteer as she slipped away, but all she felt was dust. She and the few adults left tried to calm the children, but it was no use since they themselves were horrified by what they had just witnessed.

They heard honking from multiple cars and screaming before a van crashed into the front lobby, no driver in the seat. The children clung onto the adults as everyone tried not to panic. 

Nobody knew what happened, but half the world's population disappeared in the blink of an eye. Monae’s sister and great aunt were untouched, but her friends were gone. Juju made it, but most of her neighbors had been taken in what the news was now calling “The Blip”. 

T’Challa had lost his sister and his mother in The Blip, which in turn caused the Center to lose the heads of its Social and STEM programs since Nakia decided to stay in Wakanda. When he and N’Jadaka returned to take in what was left of their staff and kids, they decided it was best to close the Outreach Center’s doors until they could find more staff and department heads. Most of the kids had disappeared and the few that remained were too traumatized by what they saw there to want to stick around.  

When they visited Monae’s office they found her frantically running around trying to organize her things to keep her mind off of the chaos going on around her. When T’Challa cleared his throat and she looked up, she made eye contact with him and she knew by the look on his face...he was gone.

Monae decided that with the Center closing she would move back home, so she packed up all her stuff, and she and Juju went on a cross-country roadtrip from Oakland to Nashville. When they arrived at her Aunt Sarah’s house she was so thankful to be in the arms of a loved one that she broke down into tears. They both held each other and cried, and when Jazz showed up a couple days later the three of them hugged each other tight, not wanting to let go of the only family they had left. 

About a week later Monae realized she hadn’t gotten her period yet, but chalked it up to the stress of The Blip and moving across the country. Another week passed and still, no period. She began to worry and then Aunt Sarah made an announcement at breakfast one morning.

“One of you is pregnant.”

Both girls narrowly avoided a spit take.

“Excuse me?”

“What do you mean ‘pregnant’?”

“I had a dream about fish last night...so which one of you is it?” she asked, looking from Monae to Jazz and back again, waiting for one of them to say something. Silence stretched over the table and when Jazz and Monae locked eyes, she broke.

“I think it’s me. I-I don’t know for sure yet, but I’m late.”

“Aww baby, it’s ok,” Sarah said as she reached out and comforted her niece.

“No it’s not, M’Baku he...he’s gone.”

“Yeah, but if you tell him-”

“No, Jazz he’s gone gone. The Blip took him,” she hung her head and played with the wooden ring on her finger.

There was silence around the table again, but this time Aunt Sarah broke it.

“So do you want to keep the baby?”

The two younger Johnson women looked at their great aunt in shock, surprised she would even ask instead of just assuming.

“I don't even know that there is one yet.”

“Chile between my dreams and your period not showing up, you’re pregnant. Go pee on one of them lil sticks, you’ll see. Now, what are you gonna do, baby?”

Monae thought about her options. Even though her mom had two kids by the time she was Monae’s age, she didn’t feel like she was ready to have children yet. Had the father been someone else, she wouldn’t even have to think it over, but this was M’Baku’s baby. She had a chance to have a little bit of him with her always, and especially now that he was gone forever she couldn’t help but want to have him around in whatever way she could.

“I’m keeping it.”

Aunt Sarah nodded in understanding and Jazz squeezed Monae’s hand.

“I’m gonna be the best Auntie I can be to that little Jabari.”

“Second best,” Aunt Sarah said with an attitude as she got up to hug Monae close. “We’re here for you honey.”

Next Chapter

Taglist: @devnicolee @maddeningmayhem @theblulife

#cecewritessometimes #black panther fic #black!oc #m'baku #m'baku's love #m’baku x oc

[shessoparticular]

Blurred Lines | Part 1 | #ShawnMendesWritingCircle

Thank you @saysweartogod-og​ for starting this #ShawnMendesWritingCircle challenge!! Hope ya’ll enjoy the first part of my shawn x pa! reader fic!

Being the personal assistant to one of the biggest popstars in the world was a busy job whenever Shawn was doing press or touring but you seemed to just be “one of the boys” whenever Shawn was recording new music. He now owned a small cottage just outside LA that he used exclusively to record all his new stuff, staying away from the now notorious cabin the woods where he recorded a lot of his earlier stuff. It quickly became one of your favorite places to spend time with one of your favorite people in the world.

You had all but moved into Shawn’s recording cottage to be on hand whenever he or his writers or producers needed anything. Shawn had insisted on you taking the guest room, claiming there was absolutely no reason for you to spend money to rent a place when he had the whole place to himself. Part of the deal was that you’d have to be on hand basically 24/7, not just for him, but for the whole team. If they wanted coffee, you got it. If they wanted any type of food, you got it. If they wanted a specific notebook, you got it. You had been Shawn’s assistant for two years and knew his favorite brands and items without giving it a second thought, stocking up on things you could’ve been asked for which made the number of times you’d actually have to leave the house minimal. Shawn This led to getting an insight into Shawn’s writing and producing habits for up to 10 hours a day. Recording time was the best time to spend around Shawn as you were free from a lot of the authoritarian figures who watched over the two of you constantly.

You knew it was inappropriate but of course you had a little bit of a crush on Shawn, who wouldn’t? Constantly throughout your working relationship, you had forgotten that he paid your bills and he was actually your boss, although he treated you like you were friends. Andrew and the team had specifically hired someone around his age hoping that they’d be able to work well with Shawn, but they never imagined that you’d have as good a relationship as you had now. You’d stay up together on the bus in the middle of tour, talking about absolutely nothing but somehow, you’d never run out of things to say, often chatting your heads off until you saw the sun come up through the front window. You’d often end up asleep on random couches in expensive hotel rooms when you decide to binge watch a movie trilogy or a season of a random show. You’d even snuck out without the others knowing, seeing the sights of whatever random city you had found yourselves in. The one thing the two of you never discussed was a kiss you had shared after a night out in Europe. You were both under the influence of a hell of a lot of alcohol and agreed to never speak on it again, Shawn saying it was a mistake. You definitely didn’t agree, it was now like it never actually happened, despite how much you wanted it to happen again. The lines of a working relationship were blurred a long time ago.

“Hey y/n, can you grab me a new bottle?” Shawn asked, holding up the empty flow bottle, distracting you from your thoughts as you sat on the beanbag placed along the wall of the small studio room. “Got you” You laughed, standing up and grabbing a new bottle from the fridge next to you, tossing it to the tall boy situated on the chair close to the desk holding a heap of expensive recording equipment. You had been too distracted by your own thoughts to see that he was staring at you before he asked the question, with the same look you would give him whenever he wasn’t looking, a look of adoration.

Shawn had developed a crush on you as well. It was kind of inevitable for him, spending all this time together, feelings were bound to appear. He was professional though, and never let himself cross the boundaries though, except for that one night. He valued your friendship too much to let anything get in the way of you keeping your job. He was happy to have you around in any capacity.

“What’s on the agenda tonight, popstar?” You asked as you took a sip of the bottled water you’d gotten out for yourself, plopping yourself back down on the beanbag. Sunday’s meant Shawn was working by himself in the studio, free from the distractions of the other producers and writers, allowing him to be the sole creator of any ideas that came to mind that day. This was your favorite way to watch Shawn work. “It’s like 6pm and I’m honestly nearly done here so what do you think about some UberEats, that beer in the main fridge and whatever new Netflix standup comedy is out?” He asks, playing around with some buttons on the panel on the desk in front of him. “Only if I get to pick where we order from” You laughed in response, pulling up the app on your phone to search for your favorite fast food burger joint. “I think I can deal with Chick-fil-A again” He chuckled. He knew you a little too well. 

Shawn returned to whatever he was creating on the sound desk in front of him, leading you to unlock your phone and open up the photos app. You spent the next however many minutes aimlessly looking at all of the photos of the two of you together, silly selfies when you were both going insane on tour and the typical tourist photos in front of landmarks all over the world featured, your mind going back to every moment you’d captured together. You smiled to yourself thinking of the memories you’d shared together.

Three hours later the two of you were curled up under blankets on the L-shaped couch, chugging your beers, chowing down on the chicken sandwiches while a Netflix standup special was playing in the background. You and Shawn rarely ever paid attention to what was playing on the TV, too engrossed in your own conversation. The two of you had discussed any random topic you could think of while consuming a copious amount of alcohol. The two of you both hadn’t had alcohol for a while, so it was affecting you a lot more than it usually did. “So… is there a girl yet Mendes?” you giggled, the beer finally making you a little bit buzzed. You were always pretty professional around Shawn and he rarely ever saw you under the influence. In the two years you’d known him, he’d never had a girlfriend. Of course, there were girls around, look at him! But they’d never stuck around. “Why do you ask me this when you already know the answer is no? We spend all our time together, I don’t have time for anyone else” He laughed, taking another swig of his fourth beer. 

“So, are there any boys?” He retorted while you rolled your eyes at him. “Yeah there’s one annoying one who depends on me for everything, his name is Shawn” you cracked yourself up, you and Shawn knew at this point the alcohol was overwhelming you. You had stayed up for another few hours, finishing off a few episodes of Jane The Virgin. “I think it’s bedtime for you, look at you” he snickered while he cleaned up the leftovers and empty bottles. You were still laid up on the couch, but now half asleep. “Only if I get to stay in your bed” you replied with a giggle, looking up at him while he stood over cleaning off the coffee table in front of you. Drunk you had a lot more courage than your sober self. “I suppose, only if you stay on your side” He laughed, obviously a bit tipsy as well. You helped him scoop up the rest of the mess before you headed towards his bedroom door instead of your own.

“So, what are we gonna talk about? I haven’t shared a bed with a boy since you started cockblocking me two years ago” you teased, looking at him from across the bed. “Cockblocking?” He asked while confused. “Yeah. You think any guy is gonna wanna try and get with me at a bar when I’m always with this extremely good-looking tall dude scaring them off?” You replied truthfully, the alcohol had obviously worn off by this point of the night. “You think I’m good-looking?” he teased, poking his tongue out at you. “Of course I think that! I’ve only had a crush on you for the last eighteen months” you finally admitted, afraid of his reaction. “That’s the alcohol talking” He sighed, with a slight look of disappointment on his face. “It’s really not. I just don’t want to risk my job, Shawn. We’ve been so professional together, trying to not break any rules. I never wanted people to think that I got to where I am by sleeping with my boss. I’d never go against Andrew or your label, Shawn. I love our relationship and how we are together so much. I’d never risk that because of a stupid little crush” You were almost crying at this point, wiping away tears as you sat up in the bed. 

“It’s not a stupid crush y/n. You know heaps of people around me have said that we look like a couple. I like you as well, you must know that already. I have for ages, that’s why I’ve never dated anyone since we got to know each other. We just can’t act on it; it would be so unprofessional” he admitted. “I wish we could, I really do. You have no idea how much I want to kiss you right now. But as you said I would hate for people to think any less of you because of it” he continued. “That’s what I thought, I want more than anything for us to actually be together and I’m annoyed that it took alcohol for me to tell you. Do you even remember when we kissed in Germany?” you asked him. “Of course I remember it. I think about it all the time” He exclaimed. “We can’t be talking about this y/n” He sighed, looking over at you. “Can’t talk about what, Shawn?” You sassed back, your sadness quickly turning to anger. “Us. There can’t be an us” He stated simply. “Then stop leading me on Shawn! You can’t treat me like more than a friend and turn it around on me when it suits you. It’s embarrassing. I don’t know if you remember, but you kissed me Shawn, not the other way around. If you want me to just act like your employee, that’s exactly what I’ll do” you yelled almost quietly, taking your pillow and storming back into the guest bedroom. You made sure to slam both his and your door as loud as you possibly could.

The next morning you made your way out to the kitchen to make your morning coffee before Shawn joined you. “I made you a coffee, boss” you sassed, passing him the extra cup you had just poured moments before he entered the kitchen. If he wanted you to act like an employee, that’s exactly what you’d do. “Thank you. I ordered from that breakfast place you like down the road. I just have to make a phone call; can you just go to the door and grab it? It should be here any minute. Then I want to actually discuss what the fuck actually happened last night.” He stated, finishing his iPhone out of his pocket. “Sure” you replied, heading to the door quickly, with your coffee still in hand, to meet the delivery driver. You grabbed the food and tipped the driver before heading back inside the door while Shawn finished off his phone call. 

You didn’t want to listen in, but you couldn’t help it. “Yeah, yeah of course” he replied to the person on the phone. “No, I’m definitely single. I’d love to take you out once you get to LA” he told the person on the other side of the call. You couldn’t help but freeze in place when you heard what he said, dropping the coffee cup, allowing the liquid to spill everywhere and the porcelain to break all over the floor, tears filling your eyes. “I’ve gotta go” He hung up quickly before looking over at you near the entrance. “y/n?” He questioned as soon as he saw the tears in your eyes. “Yeah, I heard that Shawn” You replied angrily, dropping the bag of food on the kitchen bench before storming off into your guest room, locking the door behind you.

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes angst #shawn mendes imagine #ShawnMendesWritingCircle #shawn mendes x pa! reader #shawn mendes x y/n

[d0llpie]

Tendou x reader

 Part 1    Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5

Warnings: angst, mentions of insecurity, self harm (not explicit), sexual assault, ooc ushijima and smut, please let me know if i missed anything

Word count: 2.7k

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You woke up and took a shower, as you were getting ready you decided to text Asahi to let him know what you were up to

y/n: Hey Asahi, i'm going out for brunch with a friend, hope you had a good practice and tell the team i said hello :)

Asahi: Who's the friend? Do you have enough money? I can pick you up later if you need

y/n: it's Tendou, the red head we saw on moving day, he's on the boys Volleyball team, it's okay :)

Asahi: Text me after and keep your location on

y/n: i will, love you <3

Asahi: i love you too <3

You put on a black tennis skirt, white collared tee and an oversized navy blue sweater on top. You put on some simple jewellery and make up before tying your (h/l) (h/c) in a half up half down style. After checking yourself in the mirror you wondered if you were too dressed up. You heard a knock on your door which brought you out of your thoughts and you opened to see Tendou. He was wearing black dress pants, a striped long tee with a thin collared jacket and some rings on his hands. His hands. You noticed his defined hands and how attractive they looked decorated with rings.

"N/n-chan.." he pulled you out of your thoughts while he looked you up and down blushing

"Ten-chan, you look great! I thought i might've been dressed up but it seems we have similar style" you smiled sweetly at him, feeling your heart beating faster than usual.

"You look great too, shall we head out?" he smirked grabbing the door handle behind you and closing your dorm door.

The walk to the cafe earned you both many stares as people in the streets gawked at you both who seemed caught up in your own world.

Tendous POV

This was going to be harder than expected, he felt so carefree around you and he wanted to push his doubts away and trust you just wanted to be with him, friend or more, just him. But deep down he doubted you and he hated that he did. You were holding his arm walking, talking mindlessly about different topics, he watched as you rambled on and he felt comfortable being the less energetic friend for once. You matched his energy and for now he was satisfied seeing you be the ball of energy.

"Would you get any piercings ten-chan?" he snapped out of his thoughts and looked down at you who was still clinging to his arm.

"Oh i have my ears pierced i just haven't worn them in a while, see?" he showed the 3 holes in his earlobe and y/n looked up at him surprised with a smile.

"Woah, you should've worn them today" she looked up at him and he searched her eyes for any tell that she was joking, any sign that would give him an excuse to push her away, he found none. They arrived at the cafe and sat in a small booth by the window, the sun catching y/n's hair and making it seem to glow. Tendou looked in adoration as she read the menu, why did you have to be so cute, he was still prepared, prepared to hear you say it, to say that you weren't interested in him and wondered if Ushijima was single. He'd heard it all before and was no longer shocked at the lengths girls had gone to in order to try get with the captain.

"I'll have the french toast and fruit salad please" he looked up at you and realised he hadn't even read the menu yet.

"Uh me too, thank you" he said to the waitress before handing over the menu. He heard y/n chuckle from across the table and shot her a teasing glare.

You watched as Tendou seemed to zone out while staring at you, you wanted to know what he was thinking, after all, being the only two in your dorm building would be difficult if you weren't friends.

"Tendou, are you alright?" you asked sweetly

"I'm great n/n-chan, are you?" he looked relaxed but his eyes gave away that he was avoiding something, he wouldn't even look directly at you

"Sorry if i'm wrong, but i've noticed you tense up a lot and zone out, are you sure you want to hang out with me?" He looked into her eyes and once again saw nothing but sincerity, he was so worried about her using him he had barely spoken to her all day, he hadn't even been trying to consciously push her away but it had become habit. He felt awful

"What? You're amazing i'm just, i guess i was wondering why you wanted to be friends with me" he started twirling the rings on his fingers

"Oh c'mon don't doubt yourself, you're so nice and always take me to practice, plus you're the first friend i've made at this school and your style matches mine, it was just made to be" you said dramatically, looking at the ceiling. He laughed and felt his worry release.

Back at the dorms you asked Tendou what he liked to do and he started talking to you about Shounen Jump, he seemed so excited and you wanted to share that with him

"Could i maybe borrow yours and read it?" you asked

"Yes i'll go get it right now!" his face lit up and he ran off to his dorm room, after a few minutes he ran back and handed it to you, you laughed at his excitement.

"You're beautiful you know that?" he said staring down at you, you blushed and looked up at him not knowing how to respond, before you could he went back to his dorm with a smirk on his face.

y/n: Asahi i'm back at the dorms

Asahi: are you okay? how was brunch?

y/n: it started off a little rocky but it was really fun :)

Asahi: that's great, do you want me to come visit you tomorrow?

y/n: if you're free that'd be cool, i have a question tho

Asahi: what's up?

y/n: back at the dorms Tendou called me beautiful and then just walked away..

Asahi: you cannot get a boyfriend after a week of school y/n

y/n: i never said anything like that

Asahi: introduce me to him tomorrow okay?

y/n: ugh okay, bye <3

Asahi: goodbye <3

You changed into some shorts and top before lying in bed and reading shounen jump. You heard knocking on your door but you snuggled deeper into your bed. You don't remember falling asleep but you remember you were almost finished shounen jump at some ungodly hour in the morning. Asahi was knocking on your door and calling out to you

"y/n open the door" he groaned as he'd been waiting for 10 minutes now

Tendou had woken up to the banging down the hallway and looked out to see Asahi outside your door. He made eye contact with the male and started to worry as he walked towards him, he assumed this was your brother but he seemed frustrated.

"Hi..um Tendou? is it?" he rubbed the back of his neck as he spoke to the redhead

"Yep, you're y/n's brother right? the ace?" Asahi looked up at him and smiled,

"Haha yeah i guess, is y/n in her dorm?" he asked

"Yeah she should be" Tendou said before walking towards your dorm with Asahi following. He knocked on the door and heard some shuffling before y/n opened the door.

"Asahi can you relax i'm coming-" you looked up and saw Tendou and blushed before you saw Asahi behind him

"Oh sorry, um, come in" you moved out of the way and they both walked in, Asahi watched tendou before he wrapped you in a bear hug, suffocating you.

"Asahi- let go" you squirmed and laughed as he put you down. Tendou was sitting by your desk holding his shounenjump manga and watching you, he saw how cute you looked in your pyjamas and he smirked, admiring you.

"N/n-chan, did you start reading it yet?" he said snapping you and Asahi out of your greetings.

"I actually finished it last night, that's why i was still asleep this morning" you smiled at him blushing, Asahi noticed.

"n/n-chan?" Asahi looked between you and Tendou.

You both just laughed and Tendou was smiling like crazy, ushiwaka had never read shounen jump and he never had anyone to discuss it with.

Tendou left and you and Asahi started talking

"so y/n, that's Tendou" he started the conversation

"yep, do you like him?" you asked nervously

"well do you?" he suggestively asked, you slapped his arm and rolled your eyes

"We're just friends Asahi, don't worry" you rolled your eyes at him

"But about what i said, he called me beautiful...what do you think he meant?" you looked up at Asahi

"I think he likes you, please get to know him more though, i barely even know him" Asahi sounded protective but you knew he was a big softie that would support you no matter what.

"Thanks Asahi" you smiled

After Asahi left you caught up on some homework, watching more anime than working and took a shower.

Over the next few weeks Tendou let you borrow his Jump magazines and you discussed them when going to and from practice. One of his practice matches was coming up and he invited you to come watch him play, you accepted of course.

At training he would always put his arm around you when talking to his teammates and Semi, the setter, seemed to find it amusing how smug he acted around them. You didn't mind, you enjoyed talking to the boys team and you noticed when tendou would tense up at the interactions you and Ushijima shared. You brushed it off and tried to avoid making Tendou uncomfortable.

At the practice match against some college team you sat with the girls volleyball club, next to Miki the captain and Yachi the setter. You stopped chatting when you noticed the boys team walk in, Tendou looked so laid back especially in comparison to Ushijima who looked more serious than usual, something you thought was impossible. Tendou looked up at you and dramatically waved while smiling, you laughed at him and waved back being just as dramatic. Yachi elbowed you lightly and raised her eyebrow suggestively, you rolled your eyes in return.

You watched as Tendous face changed when he made eye contact with the players in front of him, he was filled with so much intensity and he really did suit the name guess monster. Every spike he went to block he ended up killing it, he was insane. You smiled at him in amazement and he glanced up to see you looking at him from the stands, his heart fluttered and he stared back more demonic looking than ever.

They won both sets easily and as the game ended you ran down to the gym entrance ready to congratulate the team, particularly Tendou. You looked around for the tall redhead as Shirabu and Goshiki walked past, you smiled at them and gave them small congratulations as well as the rest of the team.

Finally Tendou began to approach you with Ushijima and you ran up to him and wrapped your arms around his neck giving him a hug and mumbling congratulations into his chest.

You stepped back after realising how long you'd been hugging him in front of the doorway and you looked up to see him blushing.

'cute' you thought.

"Thanks n/n-chan" he said and you smiled at Ushijima congratulating him too, he smiled back at you earning a shocked look from both you and Tendou.

You waited outside for Tendou to get changed and finish up with team, after he did you walked back towards the dorms. He noticed you started to shiver and he grabbed your hand, enveloping your smaller one in his much larger one. You looked up at him and grabbed his arm, cuddling into his side with your head resting on his shoulder as you walked. Both of you lightly blushing and enjoying each other's company.

"Y/n, do you wanna go out with me this weekend?" Tendou asked squeezing your hand lightly

"Yeah sure where do you wanna go?" you replied obviously not realising what he meant. You both hung out together often and went to the cafe down the road several times a week, but Tendou wanted to take you on a date.

"I was thinking dinner in Tokyo, there's a nice restaurant near my mums work, i've been there before and the prices aren't too bad" he hand subconsciously brought his hands into his jacket pockets, bringing yours with his, you blushed at the gesture.

"Wow Tokyo, that's fancy, are you gonna propose?" you beamed at him dramatically while giggling. He smirked at you and you answered 'yes of course' and you arrived at the dorms a few minutes later.

"Well goodnight n/n-chan thank you for coming to the game" he took his hands out his pockets and noticed he was still holding yours.

"Of course, you really were incredible out there" you said and hugged him again. You felt him tense up against you and you pulled back not wanting to make him uncomfortable but his hands snaked around your waist and pulled you back in as he held your head. You wrapped your arms around him and smiled into his chest.

"Goodnight ten-chan" you looked up at him before walking back to your dorm room feeling excited for your date in the city. A date. You hadn't confirmed if it was a date or not, you didn't want to assume so you decided to text him after your shower.

y/n: Hey Tendou

Tendou: Already miss me?

y/n: shut up

Tendou: hahaha whats up?

y/n: so this weekend..is it a date?

Tendou: Do you want it to be?

y/n: Do you have you answer everything with a question :(

Tendou: Alright, lets call it a date :)

y/n: okay :)), also i finished your other shounen jump can i borrow the next one pleaaseee <3

Tendou: Of course n/n-chan, i can bring it over now if you're too impatient to wait ;)

y/n: >:(

Tendou: i'm kidding i'll bring it to you now :)

Not long after their conversation y/n heard a knock on her door and she opened it excitedly and invited Tendou inside. He stood awkwardly by her desk while she grabbed his last copy

"Tendou.." you looked at him with a scared expression and he began to worry

"please tell me he isn't dead" you looked up at him dramatically while gripping his weekly jump copy. He relaxed and began to laugh at you, he'd never had anyone to discuss his interests with besides volleyball, and with you he could discuss both freely.

"You'll have to find out-" he was cut off by your snatching the next copy out of his hands and running to your bed, he giggled and began to leave when you looked up at him

"Don't you wanna see if he dies?" you knew he knew the outcome but you wanted to talk to him about it and he knew this too, he turned around and hesitantly sat on ur bed and watched you read.

After a while Tendou was sitting against your headboard and you were in between his legs with your back to his chest reading the manga. He was following along the storyline occasionally and playing with your hair absentmindedly. It was around 3am when he noticed you slump further down, you had fallen asleep.

He watched for a while as you slept in his arms, your chest rising a falling peacefully, he knew he should head back to his room so you wouldn't be startled when you woke up so he lay you down under the covers and grabbed the manga from your hand placing it next to your bed. He pressed a small kiss to the top of your head before returning to his room and falling asleep.

#hq #hq angst #hq fluff #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #haikyuu comfort #haikyuu #tendou #satori tendou x reader #tendou comfort #tendou satori x reader #tendou satori #tendo x reader #tendou x reader #ushijima #ushijima wakatoshi #tendou fanfiction #tendou fluff #tendou angst #tendo satori #asahi azumane #asahi fluff #asahi-nii

[carnelianns]

May I request headcanons on what ikesen warlords would do to spend time, bonding with their toddler daughter, who just barely passed the first step but eager to play with their father.

Nobunaga Oda

“It seems the little one is taking after you, fireball. I’ve never seen someone so eager to get to me, other than yourself.”

The ever sadistic critical warlord would first want to test the limits of his daughter. With every step she’d take, he’d move one back. It’s infuriating for even yourself, though your daughter’s determined face says it all.

He’ll finally stop once he deems her successful enough and when he sees you ready to give him a lecture, letting the tiny one fall into his chest.

He would then proceed to do just about anything with her, from his work, to his training, even bringing her to war councils at times. Her cuteness makes it hard for the other warlords to focus at times.

And, of course, he’s a loving father, past all the push and pull. He humors his adventurous daughter, spoiling her rotten and showing her the affection he never got from his family.

Hideyoshi Toyotomi

“Don’t go around saying I’m the Mother Hen here because I am not.” He says, disheveled, holding his daughter in one arm, a dirtied towel used for her snot in the other, and with pink clips in his hair.

It’s a miracle in itself that she can take a few steps because rare are the days that Hideyoshi is seen without his daughter in his arms.

He.. never lets go. Literally. His favorite pastime is to simply cuddle with his daughter.

A close second would be simply watching her play with one of the many toys he’s gotten for her. The sweet smile on his face, the indescribably look of love in his eyes, and the soft sigh he emits says all that is needed.

Masamune Date

“I can see this lass turning into a handful once she grows up.” He laughs out, playing his fourth round of tag with the toddler.

Masamune would absolutely love his enthusiastic little girl, and often would the Date Manor see him chasing her around, or even vice-versa.

His favorite thing to do with her, though, is to bring his daughter out to the flower fields and just laze around.

Though he is and will always be reckless and adventurous, he finds that spending time with the two people he loves the most, surrounded by sunlight and nature and warmth, is rather calming.

Ieyasu Tokugawa

“Walking causes... accidents.” His poor excuse causes you to go silent for a few minutes.

Though he says that walking too much is dangerous for a child her age, you’ve translated it into “I don’t want her to get hurt so we’re shutting out all the possibilities of pain in her life.”

It takes a while for you to coax him into it, and he only relented when you made a compromise that either he or you should be with her when she walks.

The sight of your daughter with her hand around a steely yet blushing Ieyasu’s pinky is now a norm in the Tokugawa Manor. He quite enjoys going on walks with her.

Mitsunari Ishida

“I believe you’ll be a genius when you grow up, princess!” You don’t have the heart to tell him she doesn’t understand a word he says.

At first he doesn’t know why this little child insists on walking when her legs are barely able to. Once you explained to him, he dropped all of his work and focuses on playing with his daughter. It could go on for hours. 

By far, his favorite thing to do is to read to her. Whether it be story books or reports or even war books, he finds joy in seeing her content smile as she leans her tiny head on his chest.

His favorite story to tell, however, is slightly advanced. 500 years too advanced, for the matter...

Mitsuhide Akechi

“Must you deem it unruly when I am simply spending time with my beloved daughter?” He asks, not once breaking eye contact, as your giggling daughter dangles on his arm, wriggling all around.

The cheeky thing has a horrible habit of stealing your daughter away without telling you, which can last for hours. You, however, don’t have it in you to get mad at the smirking man, or the sleeping beauty in his arms at the end of the day.

He’d find teasing his daughter quite amusing as well, and, much like Nobunaga, would step back whenever she’d take a step forward. Though his predilection stems from simply wanting to tease her.

Mitsuhide carries her around on his shoulders quite often. He doesn’t want to admit that it’s because he dislikes seeing her struggle too much.

Kenshin Uesugi

“... I don’t enjoy spending time with this little demon.” The fact that he’s been cooped up in your shared room with her for hours says otherwise.

He loves his daughter dearly, just as he does you. Which is.. Not exactly the best due to his “She wants it? It is hers.” attitude. 

More often than not, what the little girl wants is to simply spend time with her father, which is why situations like the aforementioned one happens.

Many times have you opened your bedroom screen to be welcomed by your daughter holding what appears to be a mini-weapon with Kenshin standing above, high and proud.

Shingen Takeda

“My, darling, we were simply having a little conversation. Care to join us?” 

… Is what he says after your daughter finishes babbling her gibberish, Shingen nodding seriously as if he understood what she said.

Though he finds her determination to get to him absolutely adorable, he’d rather not let her suffer that much and instead makes his way to her.

Their little tea parties are quite popular in the Kasugayama Castle. Sometimes, even a few soldiers and vassals join. The little rascal doesn’t mind -- the more, the merrier. 

Shingen doesn’t either. Her expressions are, by far, the most amusing.

Yukimura Sanada

“.. What does she want from me?” Not everyday do you see the man pointing at your stumbling daughter from a few feet away, eyes moving rapidly between her and you.

His rashness does make his daughter cry at times… Although he makes up for it by being by her side 24/7.

He doesn’t like to admit it, but he can’t hide all the careful glances and the not-so-secret kisses, and the ever-growing pile of toys.

Begrudgingly, he always ends up a doll when he’s with his daughter. Yukimura can’t say no to her tiny hands, or the makeup being smeared on his face...

Sasuke Sarutobi

“So then the shuriken is made not to hurt the opponent, but to — oh. Hello there, darling.” Sasuke would instantly hide the ninja star in his hand as he holds eye contact with your intense gaze.

Babbling to his daughter about ninjas and warlords and whatnot has become his favorite pastime. The young child doesn’t understand much, though the nods and giggles she lets out are, admittedly, quite adorable.

Sometimes, when he’s sure you’re not listening, his babbles would turn towards the topic of you. Of how great you are, how wonderful you are, how kind you are…

He’s so grateful. For you and for his little girl. For her adorable, tiny feet that always manage to catch up to him, and for your adorable scoldings.

#ikemen sengoku #ikesen #warlords #headcanons #nobunaga oda #hideyoshi toyotomi #masamune date #ieyasu tokugawa #mitsunari ishida #mitsuhide akechi #kenshin uesugi #shingen takeda #yukimura sanada #sasuke sarutobi #first req uwu #writing

[nothing-but-dreamy]

TRUE COLORS ~ Ch. 3

You want to start the series? Chapter 1

Pairing: DBH!Connor x OC!Maya

Words: 2325

Warnings: none; Connor is adorable

After another long day at the Chicken Feed truck, Maya was glad to be back home. The neverending rain got replaced by soft falling snow, how it got announced. As she entered her apartment, Maya shook off the snow from her cost and got greeted by the soft female voice of her intercom. A nice warmth and her favorite ambient music were flooding her own four walls. That was home.

The tall skyline of Detroit rose behind the windows, its lights sparkling like million candles in the distance. One by one, Maya switched on small lamps for more indirect light and atmosphere. It was just past eight but already dark. From the right, she heard a low plop.

"Hey, Trevor. You're awake. Good morning, little one.", Maya said and greeted her small, nocturnal gecko in its terrarium. The small creature croaked happily as it saw its owner. Maya sprayed water for more humidity and removed an old leaf.

"It's freezing cold outside. You can be happy to be in there where it is so warm.", she said low, closed the glass door of the terrarium and decided to take a bath. A long, hot bath would be the right thing to end this long work day and to start her evening.

*

"You have a visitor.", the intercom announced. Maya lowered her pencil and looked confused at the digital clock of her stove.

"Now? Who would visit me now?", she asked into the empty apartment. Trevor had no answer. It was past 2 AM and there was no one who would visit her to such an hour except Gary, who would have some kind of trouble. Maya sighed, stood up and answered the door. Surprise wouldn't be even the right choice of word to describe how Maya felt as she opened the door.

"C-Connor? What...what are you doing here?", she asked, still with the handle holding in her hand to close the door whenever necessary.

"Lieutenant Anderson suggested that I shall visit you.", Connor said and looked kinda lost. He had followed Hank’s instructions and yet, it seemed to be wrong again.

"Visit me? Why?", Maya asked puzzled. She watched how Connor, whose hair and shoulders were covered in snow, looked at a point in the distance. His LED flashing yellow.

"To talk about emotions.", Connor answered and looked back at Maya. She knew that she still looked at him with confusion.

"Okay, help me a bit here. I'm confused and have no idea how I could help you. Is it because of your case? Happened something there?", Maya asked directly and noticed how Connor relaxed a bit. That was a field he could control. Suddenly, she felt the coldness of the hallway on her naked feet, so she stepped aside.

"Come in. It's getting cold.", Maya said softly and let the android in, “What happened?”, she asked, closed the door and followed Connor.

"We were chasing two deviants and I...I had trained my gun at them. They were right in front of me but...", Connor started his explanation while he stepped into her living room.

"But you haven’t shot them?", Maya asked as he didn’t end his sentence. She tried to keep the nervousness out of her voice but held her breath.

"N-no... I... I couldn't.", Connor answered and looked at the ground while his LED was spinning yellow. Maya released her breath and relaxed. But she was also concerned about the state of the android.

"So, you didn't shoot them and that troubles you?", Maya asked softly. Connor nodded and this time, she gave him the time to speak when he was ready. He stopped at the wall and looked at her paintings.

"I got sent by CyberLife to investigate the spreading deviancy. The phenomenon that androids seem to start to feel. I got programmed to hunt and to stop deviants before it’s too late. To prevent something bad from happening.", he said automatically as if he was just repeating something he had said hundreds of times or what was an essential part of his code.

"But you couldn't shoot the two androids even if they were right in front of you? You acted against your program?", Maya asked, slowly understanding what the android's problem was. Connor was shifting between fulfilling his mission and obviously developing emotions on his own. For him it was problematic to process everything properly. Maya was sure that there was nothing in this world that would be more difficult for him right now.

"I... I don't know how that could happen.", Connor said and looked back at Maya who leant against her couch with her hands shoved into her front pockets.

"Can you tell me more about the androids? Or the case?", Maya asked calmly.

"It were two girls from the Eden Club. One of them killed a guy... accidentally.", Connor answered, remembering the early evening.

"Why did she kill the guy?", Maya asked, now, truly interested. Until now, she had just heard a few rumors about androids developing emotions. But murder was a whole new level.

"She said she was just defending herself as the victim started to hit her. She feared that she would die and so she... She...", Connor said and stopped.

"She defended herself to run away with another android?", Maya asked and connected the dots.

"Yeah... Lieutenant Anderson said the two girls seem to be in ... love.", Connor said and drew his brows together as he processed the said. Since he had started to talk about the case, now, it was the first time where his LED circled rapidly in a blinking yellow and a hint of red. For Maya the indicator that this was his main problem.

"They were in love? And as the one told you why she did it you couldn't shoot her?", Maya asked and Connor nodded. Once again, the android looked through her apartment to distract himself.

Connor scanned the area out of habit. The gecko croaked as it watched, very interested, how the android walked through the apartment. Next to the terrarium was a desk with sketches scattered over it. A bigger pad laid in the middle of the desk. A sketch of a person was drawn but it wasn't finished, just the outlines, so Connor had no idea what it would be later. Next to the desk was a canvas stand with a painting in the making. Several shades of green were smeared across the canvas and created an illusion of depth.

On the wall behind the stand, Connor saw finished, colorful paintings. They were paintings of geckos and plants like copies of the plants that were spread in the apartment. Connor scanned the plants. All of them were real and healthy with the right hydration. Another painting of her gecko hung at the other wall and Connor was looking at it for a few minutes. Maya walked over to him. His LED had calmed down back to blue. She was glad to see the android to be more relaxed again.

"You're very talented. Are you a painter?", Connor asked, looking at Maya with curiosity.

"Yeah... I'm currently studying art to get my bachelor's degree.", Maya said and looked at the painting one last time before she walked over to the couch. She signaled Connor to follow her. Maya sat with crossed legs in one corner of her couch and Connor sat next to her, well-behaved like a kid with his hands folded in his lap and with a straight back.

"So, how I see it, you have troubles processing the fact that you couldn't shoot the deviants how you should have.", Maya said cautiously. Connor nodded but stayed silent.

"Was it a conscious decision you made?", she asked further. Minutes were ticking by before Connor looked up at her. His brown eyes looked soft but sad. His face held a confused expression. Maya laid her hand reassuring on his arm and she noticed how his LED circled yellow. Maybe processing her question or her touch.

"Take your time to answer. We have all the time in the world.", Maya said low and softly with a smile.

"It was a decision I made. I decided not to shoot because...", Connor admitted finally.

"Because?", Maya asked softly. Connor looked from her hand into her eyes.

"I saw no reason. I knew I had to shoot them because my program, my mission, demanded it but I... I didn't want to.", Connor admitted low and blinked several times as he realized what he had said. Maya smiled softly at him.

"You made a decision on your own, Connor. It was your own decision to spare these girls because their death wasn't helpful for your mission."

"But I.. that must not be! I have to fulfill my mission to stop the deviants.", Connor said troubled.

"I'm convinced you will be able to find a way to solve this case without killing someone. There is always an alternative. To spare someone's life is always better.", Maya said and watched how Connor calmed down. His LED turned from yellow back to blue and slowed down.

"You said something about love earlier.", Maya asked and tried to guide the conversation to the next important topic. The reason why Hank had sent this android to her in the middle of the night.

"Y-yeah... Hank said the androids, the two girls, would be in love.", Connor explained and looked confused again. For Maya, he looked totally cute like this but she had to focus back on the current situation to keep a clear mind.

"You now, love is a good thing. There is no need to stop it. Love is the biggest power in this world.", Maya tried to explain a complex emotion.

"But they're androids. They don't really feel something. Their emotions are just errors in their software. They're emulating them.", Connor said, what sounded more like instructions in a manual.

"Do you really think that?", Maya asked, interested in his answer. There was something in his eyes that betrayed him.

"I.. yes.", Connor said but Maya saw the insecurity in his eyes. It had been a mechanical, programmed answer which would come automatically.

"What is love?", Connor asked suddenly.

"Oh, uhm... you can't explain that easily but I will try it. Love connects people in a powerful way. There is the bond between parents and their kids. Between siblings and of course, between two people in a relationship. When you love someone, they are the first thought in the morning when you wake up and the last before you fall asleep. You are willing to do anything for the one you love. Sometimes you fear to lose them because without them you wouldn't feel complete. There are people who would die to save the one they love. Or kill each other because they can't be together like Romeo and Juliet.", Maya tried to explain as best as possible. Love was a complex structure which wasn't easy to explain within a few minutes.

"That's a dramatic reaction.", Connor said serious as he processed the information.

"Love can be magnificent...or even disastrous. But if you love, you know that because the other person is everything you can think of. They matter more than your own life and you just want to be with them. Suddenly, there is someone in your life who seemed to be more important than yourself.", Maya closed her explanation. Connor inclined his head to one side.

"Have you ever been in love?", he asked interested. Maya was friendly and calm and the complete difference to all the humans he had met so far. He watched her bright eyes sparkling in the half dark and her hair falling over her shoulders like soft waves. For the first time, he noticed such things on someone else.

‘Software instability…’, the note popped up in front of his eyes.

"Oh… uhm…not really...not how I have explained it but in some way...yeah-", Maya explained stammering.

"But you're alone, aren't you? Or do you have a partner at the moment?", Connor asked further. Now, more interested in her than before.

‘Software instability…’, once again the note was showing up.

"No, I.. I'm single, at the moment. I had a few relationships but nothing too serious.", Maya answered, shifting uncomfortably.

"Haven't you loved them enough that they left?", Connor asked and Maya felt more uncomfortable under his intense glance which was innocent at the same time. She understood that Connor was like a child at this point. If he wanted to understand, he had to ask questions that came to his mind.

"Unfortunately, it's not that simple. There are different factors for people to stay together and sometimes... it's not enough to love each other. Sometimes even loving someone isn't enough that a relationship works out.", Maya tried to explain but she saw that Connor had difficulties to follow.

"Okay, look, I will try to explain it to you.", Maya changed her sitting position closer to Connor. He followed her lead and it seemed that he made himself more comfortable.

***

As she awoke, Maya realized that she must have fallen asleep on the couch. Slowly, she remembered how she had tried to explain love to an android the whole night. As she sat up, Maya noticed the blanket covering her.

"Connor?", she asked sleepy into the apartment but there was no response. She wasn't surprised but she smiled softly about the memories of how they had talked until she had fallen asleep against Connor's shoulder in the early morning hours.

Feeling wonderful, Maya pulled the blanket closer to her chest to keep the warmth a moment longer. That was it that a small piece of paper fell to the ground. Maya leant forward to collect it. It was just a small note but the words let her smile:

I had to leave and I didn't want to wake you. Thank you for … everything!

#connor #dbh connor #detroit connor #dbh connor x reader #dbh connor fluff #connor dbh #detroit become human connor #detroit become human #game #writing #gaming #video games #love #fanfic #fanfiction #fandom

[nad-zeta]

Match up | (• ◡•)| (❍ᴥ❍ʋ)

heya!! tysm again fr the ikesen matchup, i loved it sm ♡ sooo now could i pls get a matchup for ikevamp, if its ok? 💞 (ps i hope ur doin ok!!) here’s the info again!!

bi girl, i prefer guys! ambiverted intp, gryffindor or ravenclaw, neutral good, scorpio. i have an older twin sis n i love/hate her sm!!

medium-length straight-ish black hair (side bang to the right) & dark brown eyes!! 5'5-ish, filipina! im getting glasses soon~

complex daydreamer- i crave affirmation/praise!! anxiety, i overthink sm! quiet w/ others cause idk what to say. im like half funny/playful & half deep/awkward- easily annoyed but guilty after cause im soft-hearted. i have a way w/ words, poetic? hopeless romantic! i tend to be quite chaotic? sorta socially anxious-

not innocent/naive but ppl think so at 1st! i look fine but im a big mess. superiority complex, insecure- smart n knowledgeable. passionate! a kid w/ my twin but w/ others, mature. its hard to friend ppl! dramatic but rather closed off. its hard for me to ask fr help- opinionated but i try to understand. i need lots of space,,,

i like to have fun n loosen up but would also just cuddle n have long convos. forgive but never forget- realist but rather optimistic. good w/ technology! imaginative/creative. near-sighted! rather selfish, i put myself 1st. love language is words of affirmation/quality time- stubborn! observant- sensitive.

a habit- i tend to drift away n just think? i care a lot abt how i look! i like bein the best so i get competitive. keyboard smashes!! i swear quite often. i like bein organised! i like makin faces!!

fun fact: math/history r my faves. sometimes im rlly hyper n say the most random things? i fear judgement, future, unknown, n failure. bilingual, learnin french! fr pda only hand-holding?

likes: gaming, affection, jokes (stupid/puns), space (stars), weapons (swords/guns), music, instruments (piano), animals, movies, books, philosophy, psychology, writing, exhilirating stuff, astronomy, mythology, etc.

dislikes: heat, presentations, naivety, stupidity, blind faith, stereotypes, being pressured, etc.

tysm!! shjsjsjs i changed it a bit- anyway, stay safe!! dont forget to take care of urself 💞

Hehe, you are most welcome dear!🥰❤🌻 I’m so happy you sent in another request! You are honestly so sweet! ❤🥰Soz for taking sooo long! I hope you enjoy this dear and I hope you are looking after yourself! Sending lots o hugs! 🌻❤ @x-joie-x

So I match you with………….. Napoleon

The first time Napoleon meets you was when he legit grabbed your hand and pulled you along with him, as he tried to get you out of the mansion. It was not safe for a human in a mansion full of vampire, and this soldier wanted to get you out before it was too late. But alas it was just that, too late. By the time the two of you had arrived at the door from whence u came, it was sealed shut, and no amount of tugging or pulling could get it to open.

Comte, who had heard the commotion, stepped into the hallway to see you and Napoleon trying to open the door. He strode over to you and placed a gentle hand on your shoulder as he led you and the soldier to his study so he could explain. After a lengthy explanation about your current situation he named Napoleon as your personal bodyguard to help you navigate, the Paris of the past

To say you were starting to overthink and get anxious would be an understatement. Napo looked over at your quiet demeanour and scanned your face to find a glimpse of anxiety. After the conversation with Comte was over, Sabastion came to escort you to your room for the night.

The next few days you spent cooped up in your room. Too anxious to leave, u needed time and space to sort through your feelings. 

Your stomach started grumbling, but you just ignored it, cause honesty you were just too stubborn to go downstairs and ask for help. Napo had been pacing outside your door, trying to figure out the best way to coax you from your room. That’s when he heard the rumble coming from your stomach. He gently opens the door and strode into your room, “come nunuche, I made too many pancakes this morning, And I need some help finishing them.” Just as you were about to refuse your stomach gave another loud growl, cue Napoleon bursting out into laughter, “I think its best we feed that little bear before it gets angry.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle at Napo, as the soldier went from scary and intimidating to boyish and playful in 0.2 seconds. You smiled as you watch the former Emporer of France try to catch his breath through his full body laughter fit. He finally calmed down and grabbed your hand, pulling you towards the dining room. A new fit of laughter erupted from the man as you couldn’t help but crack a joke on your way there. The rest of the afternoon was spent cracking jokes and eating pancakes.

Napo found you incredibly amusing, especially how you could go from funny and playful, to awkward in 2 seconds flat. He loved to joke along with you and then tease you whenever you would turn into an awkward mess the second one of the other residents entered into the room. 

Especially Arthur, you would often get annoyed at his flirty comments and pick up lines, you absolutely left Napo in stitches when you made a sarcastically awkward comment back to Arthur on afternoon. Napo had learned by now that you were actually rather soft-hearted so the minute he saw the guilt flash across your eyes for being annoyed at Arthur’s comments, he squeezed your hand in reassurance, “don’t feel guilty nunuche, trust me he deserves it. Plus if you don’t believe me, just ask Isaac.”

Napoleon would invite you with him every day to help teach the children at his makeshift school. At first, you were somewhat socially awkward, but thanks to Napoleon and Isaac’s encouragement, you actually started teaching a class of your own. Napo loved how smart and passionate you were. You gave your all in teaching the children various topics, and honestly, Napo couldn’t help but fall in love with you. You taught them everything from maths to history, and the children absolutely adored you. So did Napoleon tbh, the man would take sneaky glances just watching you in your element. When stealing these little glances of you, a lovestruck foolish smile would dance across his face, which most certainly didn’t go unnoticed by Isaac or the children.

After class, Isaac would go off to his second job as a professor of the University, leaving you and Napoleon up to your own devices. Napoleon seemed to bring out that playful side of you, as the two of you goofballs would grab lunch at a nearby cafe. Or have a little picnic in the park, and just spend the entire time quick-firing stupid puns and jokes at each other. You sometimes get super hyper and start saying random words, which leads the two of you to have loads of random conversations. And TBH the two of you are always pulling silly faces at each other just for laughs. You live for those moments when u make a joke or pull a face, and monsieur de Whaha starts erupting with laughter. It is a true sight to behold, the way his whole body shakes, and the sight alone is enough to prompt you into your own laughing fit.

The day Napoleon knew you were the one and only woman for him, was the day he found you in the training hall. You loved swords and weapons so when you were helping Sebastian with housework one day, and you came across a vast display of swords, you were absolutely ecstatic. You wasted no time in picking up one of the swords and swishing it around. Napoleon walked into the room just as you pick up one of the swords and his eyes went wide, “pfft what in the world are you doing?” You narrowed your eyes at the man, as he chuckled, “practising, obviously.” 

Napoleon’s eyes lit up as he strode past you to pick up a sword of his own, “then I shall be your partner.” You smiled a broad smile as you went on the offensive and attacked Napoleon. The two of you spent the next few hours smack-talking each other as you fought. Napoleon enjoyed every moment of your fight and the way you were determined to win. He found that competitive side of you rather sexy, so much so that he decided to confess his feelings.

After you had beaten him, he proposed a rematch, but this time he raised the stakes. He went on the offensive, and just before delivering the final blow, he dropped his sword and grabbed hold of you. Smouldering jade blue eyes met your brown ones questioningly, and once he found his answer, he leaned down to kiss you.

The former emperor of France was utterly head over heels for your stubborn optimistic, competitive personality. He absolutely adored what a walking contradiction you were, being both a realist and optimistic, being organized yet messy at the same time. Napoleon had noticed early on in your relationship that you were rather closed off and slowly, but surely he managed to get you to open up to him. The two of you have had many a deep conversation while cuddling. 

He found that whenever you were snuggled in his arm, it was easy to pry information out of you. Especially when he would tickle you. He found out a lot during his cuddle interrogation sessions like how you feared judgement, the unknown future and failure, like how you actually care about your appearance and that you have a superiority complex. None of which scared him off, if anything he loved you more for it! Being sure to curb and banish all your insecurities with the sweetest words of affirmation and praise.

Napo like you, is also a bit of a romantic so this dork will 100% plan dates under the stars, especially after he found out about your love for astronomy and space/stars. He will definitely plan small quiet dates for the two of you, away from the loudness of the mansion. This boi will burst into your room in the afternoon, drag you to the stables, plonk you on top of a hose and before you know it you are sitting in his arms reading or chatting about anything from philosophy to psychology under the shade of a willow tree, surrounded by flowers.

Napo loves your writing, and this boi will insist you read him your fics whenever you finish them. He will spend the next ten days bragging about how amazing your writing skills are to everyone, even going as far as to say your a much better writer than Arthur. 

Knows you need space and alone time and will give you as much as it as you need. He knows you will come and find him once you want some company again. And once you do seek him out, he will crush you in a warm embarrass and whisk you off on some exhilarating adventure.

Mornings between the two of you sweethearts consist of soft, heart-melting moments. Naturally, the first thing Napo does when he wakes up is, plant a loving kiss on your lips. He will tighten his embrace around you as he cracks open his eyes to wish you a good morning all while nuzzling your neck. He knows you are a sucker for sweet words so he will be whispering the sweetest of endearments to you, in between lazy morning kisses. Best be sure this boy will complement and praise you every single day of your life.

Other potential matches…………….. Dazai

I hope you enjoyed this dear! 🌞🌻and I hope you have a super good day! ❤❤🌻

#matchups #matches #match ups #ikesen matchup #ikevamp matchup #ikevamp match up #ikevamp napoleon #napoleon ikevamp #napoleon bonaparte #ikemen vampire napoleon #ikemen napoleon #submission

[castielismyfavouriteangel]

Gentlemen

It was a habit he picked up during his time with Lisa. He opened the car door, he pulled out the chair, he helped with the coat. He just couldn't stop it. But also didn’t really notice it.

But the small smiles it put onto Cas face were worth it. He never said anything, but the fond smiles made Deans knees go weak all the time.

So after a successful hunt Dean - as always - opens the car door for Cas to get in.

“May I ask you something, Dean?” Cas asks.

“Well, technically you just did, but you can ask me another question.” Dean says and winks at Cas while getting into the car himself.

“Why do you always open the car door for me? Or any other door for that matter. I’ve never seen you doing that for someone else, like Sam or Jack. I think the only time I’ve ever seen you doing that, was when you were with Lisa and I was watching over you. So why for me? Is there anything special about me? Don’t you trust me not to scratch the finish of your precious car?”

With every word Cas said Dean felt his heart sink even lower. He hadn’t even realized he was doing all those things. And now that he thought about it, yeah, the only time he did something like that was when he was involved with someone romantically. Was his subconscious trying to tell him something? Did he have deeper feelings for Cas than he thought he had?

He had always deemed Cas somewhat good looking, with his tousled hair that never seemed to stay in one place, the strong jawline with the everpresent stubble, those plump, chapped, pink lips that no chapstick in the world could smooth out. And then there were his eyes. Those beautiful orbs of the bluest blue Dean has ever seen as an eye color.

Holy Crap!!

Dean was in love with Cas!

How come he never noticed it! Cas was his best friend, the one guy that promised to always be there for him, to never leave him. Would it be so bad if there was more than friendship involved? Would Cas even want anything more than friendship?

Dean was majorly freaking out, at least internal, on the outside he’s been sitting in Baby’s drivers seat for the past 5 minutes, staring into the abyss.

“Dean? Are you alright? If I said something to upset you, I’m truly sorry. I didn’t even wanna mention it, but I was wondering what’s going on but I really didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything. I’m sorry, Dean, please forgive me.”

Cas’ voice carried Deans thoughts back into reality.

“Yeah, no problem, Cas, I was just thinking. Put your seatbelt on.”

Bam! Another detail he usually only tells his s/o.

“Dean, I’m an angel, even without all my powers I couldn’t get killed or even hurt in an car accident.” with a sigh he tried to put the seatbelt on, but struggled until Dean lent him a helping hand.

“Yeah, that might be, but when the police stops us I have to pay the fine for you not being properly beltet.” Dean tells him while putting on his own seatbelt.

On the whole ride back, which took several hours, the two didn’t say a single word, but Dean was thinking a lot. Thinking about all the times he was alone with Cas and what he did, that he usually only did if he’s in love with someone. And the list was long, very long.

Apparently he’d been falling in love with Cas without even noticing. But when did that all start? Was there ever a time he wasn’t like this? Did he fell in love at the very beginning? But he wasn’t gay? Well, maybe he was a little gay. There was his Dr. Sexy obsession and that guy that kinda catfished him with the Golem, what was his name? Aaron Something. It didn’t matter.

But how would he talk to Cas about that?

Hey, Cas, just uh, I think I’m in love with you, so...you wanna make out or something?

Yeah, no, that was bullshit. He had to smooth into that particular conversation, it was a sensitive topic after all, he could lose his best friend about this.

Dean let out a heavy sigh when he finally parked Baby in the Bunker’s garage.

“I’m sorry, Dean, I really didn’t want to upset you with that question.” and without a look in Deans direction Cas got out of the car and into the Bunker.

Dean let his head fall onto the steering wheel.

Great!

This was going to be one hell of a conversation.

The next evening Dean made two large cups of hot chocolate, he knew how much Cas loves that stuff, and went over to Cas room to have a - probably - rather unpleasant conversation.

Since his hands were full with the cups he used his foot to knock, it kinda worked, after all Cas opened the door, even if with a puzzled look on his face, which quickly turned into a happily surprised one, once he noticed what Dean was carrying.

He took one of the cups out of Deans hands and waved his arm into the room to invite him in. Dean did, sat down on the foot end of Cas’ bed and patted his hand on the empty space besides him, so Cas would sit down there, which he promptly did while sipping his cocoa.

“What brings you here bearing gifts, Dean?” Cas asked, again with the puzzled look on his face.

“Well, I need to talk to you about something.” Dean started but Cas interrupted.

“Is it about the question I asked you yesterday? If so you don’t have to say something, I understand.” now it was Dean’s turn to be surprised.

“You do? But how? I only just realized it yesterday myself? How could you have known about this?”

“I know a lot more about you than you think, Dean. I just don’t understand why you wouldn’t just tell me you just like to be a gentleman from time to time? It’s not like it’s a big deal or anything and I really appreciate the gesture.” Dean actually snorted with laughter.

“You…” he fell into a giggle fit. “You thought I just wanna play the gentlemen once in a while?”

“Well, yeah. Sam would just give you a hard time about it and Jack wouldn’t know how to appreciate the gesture, he does kinda lack the knowledge about some finer social norms.” Cas did his adorable head tilt while saying this and Dean’s heart began to practically glow.

“I’m sorry, Cas, but you’re very far away from the truth here.” Cas brows furrowed while still having his head slightly tilted. Dean just wanted to kiss him then and there, but he first had to finish this conversation.

“The actual truth is...I don’t even know how to start with this,” Dean paused for a moment and recollected his thoughts.

“You made a comparison yesterday, that you only ever saw me doing that when I was with Lisa. And after some thinking I came to the same conclusion, I only ever did all that with someone I was romantically involved with.” he put some emphasis on that word specifically, hoping Cas would get the hint.

“Well, yeah, I know what I said. But that just fits into my conclusion. You miss having someone you can care about and - well - pamper a little, so you took me as a substitute. I don’t mind it, Dean, I rather really appreciate it.” there was this amazing Cas-Smile Dean could never have enough of.

“No, Cas, you’re still wrong. I don’t ‘use you’ as a substitute for something I’m missing." he actually did the air quotes.

“It’s rather I realized you have kinda become that kind of person I usually do all those things for.” he smiled at Cas who was still looking at him with furrowed brows.

“I don’t think I can follow, Dean. What kind of person did I become? I’m fairly sure I’m still the same person I was when I raised you from hell. I didn’t change. Well, I did change periodically, but I always became myself again in the end, didn’t I?”

Internal Dean was laughing, but not to hurt Cas’ feelings he kept his outside face straight.

“Cas, stop thinking so hard about this. What I was trying to say is, I think you’ve become the kind of person I’d like to be with. Like, really be with. Be with in a romantical way.” Dean couldn’t look at Cas any longer. The fear of seeing his face change into something like aversion or even disgust was too much to handle for him. He flinched when he felt Cas hand on his chin, guiding his face so he would look at him again.

The look on Cas’ face was nothing like what Dean was afraid of. It was soft and pure and Dean would’ve sworn he even saw the glistening of tears in the corners of Cas’ eyes.

“Oh Dean.” it was just shy from a whisper.

“Why did it took you so long to realize this? I always told myself you don’t feel this way about me and that I should stop hoping for you to come around.” Cas thumb was slightly caressing Dean’s jaw while he was talking.

“You wanna know why I volunteered to get you out of hell? I’ve been watching you, or rather watching over you, for quite some time already, and when you went to hell I was heartbroken. But then we got the command to raise you and I couldn’t have let anyone else get you out of there. And ever since I’ve been secretly pining for you, hoping that one day you’d return my feelings.”

There was a look on Cas face Dean had never seen on him before. It was a look he had last seen on his mother’s face. It was pure and unconditional love.

“I fucking love you, Cas” was everything Dean was able to say before he took Cas face into his hands and kissed him with a passion he never even kissed Lisa with.

@bend-me-shape-me @helianthus21 @pray4jensen

#Monday 2: Gentleman #Fanfiction #Fanfic #Ficlet #SPNStayAtHome #Writing #My writing #Destiel #Fluff #Castiel #Dean Winchester

[amyscascadingtabs]

i’ll walk through hell with you

chapter 6. i’ll be your arms, i’ll be your steady satellite

read on ao3

read earlier chapters

The Santiago Siblings with families spend a weekend together, Amy’s feeling weird, and Jake’s getting suspicious.

september.

Amy throws out the ovulation tests first. Then, most of the pregnancy tests.

She keeps a few, in case of emergencies, but she hides them so far inside their bathroom cabinet, buried underneath boxes of band-aids and disinfectant wipes, she tells herself it’s the same thing.

 She also throws out the vitamin supplements and the gross herbal teas, and puts the cherished pages of the fertility binder through her paper shredder while Jake shakes his head at her.

“You’re being crazy,” he states when she empties the paper confetti in the trash, immediately tying the bag shut and placing it by the door.

“Nope,” she responds. “I’m finally being sane.”

She stops doing yoga, not that she got into a habit with it in the first place. She goes back to her usual diet and coffee habits. She deletes every fertility-related bookmark off of her computer and unfollows all the Instagram accounts she once tried to find support in. There’s a smidge of panic and hard-hitting grief the first few times she sees a pregnant person somewhere, a harsh pain that comes with knowing for certain she’ll never experience it again, but most of all, Amy feels free. As heartrending as the knowledge is, she’d take it over uncertainty any day of the week.

 Her days of the week are moving quickly, too. It's like the moment she stopped being consumed by this, the rest of her life caught up with her, and now it’s speeding past. Leah starts her first Tiny Tots preschool class, and her parents cry for a good ten minutes after dropping her off the first time because their baby is growing up and it’s all moving too fast. They start doing proper research on allergy-friendly cats and even schedule a visit at a cattery. Work speeds up and she has to work overtime for more days in a row than she's done since having a kid, making her fear their apartment will fall into pieces and her daughter forget who she is, but she comes home each night to dinner on the table and Leah in pajamas begging her to read a bedtime story. She makes sure to thoroughly thank her husband, especially the night when there’s a takeout box with potato pancakes waiting for her, and promises him a proper reward once the weekend rolls around.

“Cool, cool,” he mumbles half-asleep as he makes himself the little spoon in bed. “Also, while we’re on the topic, those potato pancakes definitely weren’t because Leah and I had ice cream for dinner. In case you were thinking that.”

“Jake.”

“Mm. Goodnight, babe.”

 Even without the fertility treatments, her free time between work and family life remains strictly limited, but she does manage to squeeze in something much needed. Every other Thursday night at eight o’clock sharp, Amy finds herself outside the door to Rosa’s apartment, and every night Rosa cuts right to the chase.

“You’re not pregnant?”

“Nope.”

“Not taking any fertility medication?”

“Stopped them all.”

“Take a shot, Santiago.”

She’s decided not to tell more people about her experiences, doesn’t see the point when all she wants is to forget, but every other Thursday night, she vents. Rosa lets her speak, sometimes offering commentary but mostly just nodding, and Amy’s pleasantly surprised to discover it helps.

She’s not alone, and most importantly, she’s going to be okay again.

 ~

 october.

As the end of October arrives, it becomes time for the weekend with all the Santiago siblings and their families renting a cabin upstate. Tony calls it a tradition even though it's the first time they're doing it, but when Amy points this out, he simply shrugs and says it's important to have goals in life.

At first, she's skeptical about it - spending four days in a cabin with fifteen adults, thirteen kids and one dog feels like a polar opposite to the relaxed family time she craves - but it's been forever since she saw them all and she supposes she could use some time away from Brooklyn’s buzzing city life, so they decide to go. She nearly regrets it after three hours in the car with the Frozen-soundtrack on repeat, but then they reach their destination, and all is forgiven when Leah runs to hug all her cousins.

 Friday morning, they arrange a big leaf fight in the yard. At first, it's kids against adults, but as more and more children drop out, it becomes Santiago siblings against partners, and as more and more adults drop out too, eventually it's just Amy and Julian against Jake. The fight lasts until Jake starts complaining about there being leaves in his ear. At that point, Amy's laughing so hard her stomach hurts.

“Loser does all the dishes after lunch,” Julian grins, and Jake looks like he's about to cry.

Amy checks in on him after ten minutes. His shirt is wet from the soapy water and she can see the terror in his eyes as he looks to the mountain of dirty plates, glasses, and cutlery, but he’s scrubbing hard at them one by one with furious determination.

“Need any help, babe?” She sneaks her arms around him from behind, pressing a kiss to his neck and pulling out a small twig that’s still stuck in the back of his hair.

“Desperately,” he groans, wiping his hands on his jeans and facing her. “But I have to prove my strength to your brothers.”

“Actually, I’m pretty sure Julian just wanted a reason to see you in a wet t-shirt.”

“He could have just asked.”

Amy laughs, shaking her head. “I’ll help you out.”

He squints. “Are you sure? You look kind of... tired.”

She raises an eyebrow.

“Not like that,” he says, rolling his eyes. “But you look a little - I don’t know - pale? Did you not have coffee this morning?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t finish it. Creamer tasted weird.” He opens his mouth to say something, but she shuts him up with a glare. “I’m fine. Come on, I’ll help you finish these.”

 -

 They manage to get done right on time for a family walk in the woods. Leah makes it about a quarter of a mile before she starts complaining, so Jake carries her on his shoulders, which results in immediate chaos and tears from David’s twins when they demand the same and David can’t carry them both. Amy helps her brother by carrying Samuel on her shoulders, but the kid must have dog hair on his clothes from playing with Julian's dog, because her nose gets stuffy after only a minute. If it weren’t for the animal being straight-up adorable, or for Leah's excitement when Julian asks her if she wants to hold Oscar’s leash for a minute, Amy swears she would be yelling at this dog, too.

 The stuffy nose lasts for the entire afternoon, and she curses the fact that she forgot her allergy nasal sprays at home. Luckily, she’s surrounded by plenty of good distractions, and the afternoon disappears in a jumble of trying to keep different children from hurting themselves or others while also trying to make sure they’re happy, and if she’s not watching any kids, she’s trying to keep up with what feels like a billion different conversations going on at the same time. It’s enough to make anyone exhausted. She tries to have another cup of coffee, black this time to avoid the probably-bad creamer, but she only gets down a few sips before her throat goes all dry and she has to breathe real hard for the nausea to pass. She pours out the rest in the kitchen sink.

 Despite her tiredness and stuffy nose and sudden coffee aversion, Amy has a lovely day. When afternoon becomes evening, everyone who isn’t cooking dinner makes their way down to the nearby lake to watch the sunset. Leah’s in Jake’s arms with her head on his shoulder, looking all cozy in her purple fluffy hoodie as she sings the lyrics to Moana in the wrong order, and Amy can’t fight the urge to kiss her sweet little face until Leah grimaces and says stop, mama, hiding her face in Jake’s shirt as he laughs.

They’re her favorite sight in the world - the love of her life, and the child who’s held Amy’s whole heart in her hands since the first time she waved to them on an ultrasound screen over three years ago. Jake whispers something to Leah that Amy can’t hear, the girl giggles, and her heart aches with how much she loves them. She may never get the kids-plural family she pictured in her younger days, but she gets this, and it’s better than anything she could have imagined.

 -

When all the kids have gone to bed - save for seven-month-old Charlie, who’s wide awake and happy to get passed around between different pairs of arms - the adults gather in the living room for a chance at uninterrupted conversation and a glass of wine. Amy finds space in the corner of a couch, with Jake on her left and Tony’s wife Clara in an armchair on her right, and gratefully accepts the glass of red wine Lucas gives her. She takes a sip, first enjoying the taste, but the second sip tastes off and the third is awful. She tries to hide her grimace as she puts it down on the side table and asks for a glass of water instead.

 She's not really listening to the conversation, zoning out and just enjoying the comfort of Jake's arm around her shoulders, but Clara nudging her arm gets her attention.

“Do you want to hold Charlie for a while, Amy?”

“I’d love to,” she says, and the next second there's a baby in her arms who's shooting her the brightest of toothless smiles and reaching for her necklace. Charlie’s chubby fingers try to grab the L and J-pendants, so she gently separates his hands from them and he starts playing with a sling of her hair instead.

“Oh, you're strong,” she laughs as he grips it. “Wow.”

“Tell me about it,” Clara laughs. “Sometimes he’s lucky he’s cute.”

Amy smiles. The baby is already snuggling his head into her chest, making himself comfortable. He's truly adorable with round cheeks and light-ginger hair, melting her heart as he grips onto her shirt.

She's missed this. Still, it’s less painful now that she knows - she might never have more babies of her own, but she’ll always have plenty of nephews and nieces to hold, cuddle and play with.

“You're adorable,” she whispers to Charlie with a kiss to his forehead. “Yes, you are.”

“Hey, Amy?” David catches her attention from the opposite couch. “Aren't you guys going to have more kids?”

She can feel Jake freeze next to her.

“We’ve thought of it,” she says calmly. “But we landed on one kid. We’re happy with that.”

Jake squeezes her shoulder.

“Really? Huh.” David nods in surprise. “Don’t you want more kids, Jake?”

“It's not my decision to make,” he shrugs, like it was an obvious fact. “I'm just hoping we can get a cat soon.”

 Charlie falls asleep in Amy's arms, staying there even as people begin to drop out and head to bed. She gives him back to Tony when it’s time for a diaper change, closing her eyes and leaning against Jake's chest once her arms are free again.

“You okay, Ames?”

“Yeah,” she promises. “Just sleepy.”

“You didn't drink anything,” he notes, nodding to her untouched glass.

“Did you try the wine?” He nods. “I hated it. I think Julian has crappy taste in alcohol.”

Jake shrugs. “It tasted fine to me. Maybe your taste buds are being weird.”

“Or I have better taste than you.” She kisses him on the cheek. “Let's go to bed, babe.”

 -

 She’s barely closed her eyes before Leah climbs into their bed, full of energy as she makes space between her parents.

“I wanna go outside and play,” she insists, and when this doesn’t garner enough of a response, she frowns. “It’s morning!”

Amy reluctantly opens her eyes to reach for her phone, reading the time. “Half-past seven.” Weird. They went to bed at one a.m. and Leah’s slept through the night, yet it feels like she was woken up after ten minutes.

“Hey, I have an idea,” says Jake, pulling his daughter close and tickling her neck. “How about we play in here for a while? I have a great idea for something.”

“What?”

“Well, you see, bumblebee, you’re a super brave space pirate. This bed is your spaceship, and mama and I are your innocent, weak humans that you’ve captured.” He yawns. “The rules are that we have to lay still. If we move, we’ll fall out into space and, uh, die.”

“Okay! Dada, still!”

“I love this game,” Amy mumbles, pulling the covers closer around herself.

 The spaceship game lasts a full ten minutes before Leah tires, deciding that her parents are too boring captives for her taste and starting a new game that circles around her trying to jump from the bed onto her mattress in increasingly creative and less-than-safe ways. Jake defuses the situation before she tries to do a backflip, suggesting that they get out of bed and see if any other cousins are up yet, and Amy tries to open her eyes again. It’s painful - her body screams for more sleep, and she channels this into the pleading look she gives Jake.

“Can I get another half hour? I feel like I’m going to collapse if I get up now.”

“Huh.” A line appears between his brows. “Are you sure you’re fine?”

“Yeah,” she yawns. “I just need thirty minutes, like I said.”

“Okay, I’ll wake you up when there’s breakfast - Lee, wait!”

He disappears out the door chasing after their daughter, and Amy sighs in relief as she lets her eyes fall closed again.

It still feels like no time has passed before Jake comes to tell her the thirty minutes are up, but she forces herself to get out of bed anyway. They have a long day ahead of them, and Amy’s not risking getting teased by her brothers for wanting to sleep in. Instead, she throws on a hoodie to hide the fact that she’s freezing, and pours herself a big cup of coffee at the breakfast table. She manages four sips before it threatens to come back up again. Luckily, one-year-old Milo chooses that exact moment to almost choke on his piece of toast, and no one except for Jake seems to notice the gagging expression on her face as she tries to swallow everything back down.

 She must be getting the flu, or maybe she’s picked up some other bug from her daughter. She’s cold, a little dizzy, and the stuffy nose refuses to pass even though she keeps away from the dog. They go to play in the woods while the sun is still shining, and Amy’s enjoying herself as she watches Jake run with Leah in his arms towards a tree, touch her feet against the wood and yell Parkour! only to make the girl lose it with laughter every time, but she’s so tired when they get home, she’s barely sat down in an armchair before she’s nodded off again.

 “Hey, Ames.” Jake’s firm hand on her shoulder makes her return to consciousness. His mouth is set in a hard line, and there’s a seriousness to the way he watches her that reminds her of the way he gets whenever she’s really sick, all worried and overly protective like he thinks she’ll instantly drop to the floor if he’s not right there. “Can we talk in private?.”

She nods, following him back to their bedroom where he closes the door. He sits down cross-legged on Leah's mattress, and she takes her chance to lay down on the bed, propping her head up with two pillows. “Okay. What’s up?”

He gives her a scrutinizing look. “Are you sure you’re just tired?”

“I mean, I feel a little off, I’m sort of dizzy and my allergies are annoying.” She sniffles. “Probably coming down with some bug. Why?”

“Your immune system is way better than mine, though. I’m always the first one to get sick after Leah and I’m fine. I don’t even think she’s been ill in weeks. Isn’t it weird that you’re the only one feeling sick?”

Amy shrugs. “Exception that proves the rule?”

“Yeah, or you’re not sick.”

“What do you mean?”

“Ames,” he says in a low voice, his tone slightly hesitant. “You don’t think there’s a chance you might be - I don’t know, pregnant?”

“Come on. How would that have happened?”

“Uh -”

She rolls her eyes. “Sure, but I think we established my body didn’t want it to happen for us again.”

“Maybe, but face the facts. You’re exhausted, your taste buds are funny, and you were like, seconds away from throwing up your coffee this morning. You’re cold, you’re dizzy…” He counts on his fingers as he lists the symptoms. “It sounds a lot to me like before we found out you were pregnant with Leah?”

“Or it sounds like it's been a couple of intense months, my body's fighting an infection and I’m getting ill once I'm relaxing.”

“Have you gotten your period this month?”

She glares at him. “Stop.”

“Well, have you?”

She sighs and pulls out her phone from her pocket, opening it to her period tracker. Current Cycle - day 33. “It's a few days late.”

Jake’s eyes go wide.

“No.” She shakes her head before he can say anything. “Nope. That doesn't mean anything. My cycle got screwed up after the treatments and they said it could take months to return to normal.”

“Yeah, but…”

“No. Seriously. We both know I’m not pregnant.”

He squints. “We do?”

“Yes. And I can’t let myself think about it, Jake, because if I do…” She bites her lip at the crystal-clear memories of ovulation strips, shots and negative pregnancy tests, of feeling betrayed by her own body time and time again. “I’ll start to go crazy. I just got away from that obsessive headspace. I can’t go there again, I can’t have another negative staring me in the face, I just… can’t.”

He nods slowly, gaze still full of worry as he sits down next to her. “Okay. I just thought I’d ask.” His hands rub soft circles on her neck to ease the tension there, his lips brushing against hers for a few seconds. “Love you.”

“Love you too.” She sighs. “God, I need another nap.”

“I’ll make an excuse for you,” he says, and she swears she’s never been more in love with him in her entire life.

 -

 Jake doesn’t bring it up again, and Amy’s grateful. It's not that she doesn't wish for his suspicions to be true - her falling pregnant naturally would be a miracle - but she can't let herself think about it, let alone hope. She spent a year hoping and it led nowhere. This isn't the first time she's imagined symptoms that turned out to be nothing. If she lets herself have hope another time, only to be faced by cruel disappointment, she's certain she's going to shatter.

The weather changes from gorgeous sunshine to heavy rainfall, effectively locking every present Santiago family member inside of the cabin and creating yet more chaos. Luis and Christian organize a game night for the kids, first consisting of child-friendly memory-games and puzzles, but as more and more kids go to bed, eventually the adults drag out Monopoly and get drunk. They also get insanely competitive. When Simon starts threatening Tony about having him do another challenge for his YouTube channel, and Tony threatens to wrestle Simon right there on the floor, the game is quickly changed to Cards Against Humanity which soon becomes a dangerous game of Never Have I Ever. Amy opts for alcohol-free wine, and it’s probably lucky, because her brothers are ruthless. Never have I ever had a catastrophic double date - drink. Never have I ever made out with someone at work - drink. Never have I ever accidentally startled a man with a genetic heart condition, resulting in his immediate death - drink, remind Julian he’s an asshole, and come up with a good revenge question. She’s relieved they go to bed before anyone can suggest a game of truth or dare.

 The next day, she's feeling much better, and manages almost half a cup of coffee without nausea. She must've been right about it being some kind of infection, she thinks, pleased that it seems to be passing.

The weather isn't improving, so she teams up with a few of her brothers and their families to go to a nearby, kid-friendly, museum while Jake, Julian, and Simon visit a sneaker outlet. Leah finds an activity station and plays there for nearly fifteen minutes with her cousins before breaking down in tears when someone takes a crayon from her, and after it’s been another ten minutes of crying, Amy eventually chalks the child’s sudden fury down to low blood sugar. She ruffles through her bag for a snack and finds an unopened bag of dried mango, and two slices later, Leah is back to normal. Amy also finds an unopened tampon package, giving her a nudging reminder that her period’s still nowhere to be seen, but she shakes away the thought. Had this been a couple of months ago, she would've been rushing to take a test, and she gives herself a mental pat on the back for acting so calm about it now. She knows this means nothing and she's not stressing out. There’s this tingling, cramping, feeling low in her stomach anyway, aching for a moment before immediately fading. Surely that must mean her period is coming.

 They go to bed early on their last night away, ready for the drive home the next day. Leah wakes up crying about a nightmare, so Amy ends up sleeping next to her in their bed with Leah's little legs curled against Amy's stomach and her hand gripping her wrist. As far as sleeping positions go, she could think of far more comfortable or ergonomic ones, but there's no denying the coziness of it. Leah snuggles her nose into the crook of Amy's neck, and Amy falls asleep just smelling her head, and if she’d ever been asked to describe the word peaceful with one situation, she would have chosen this.

 -

 At first, she thinks she's dreaming about a real past event. She's back in the bedroom of their apartment, with Jake sleeping on her right and Leah asleep in her room, but Amy's awake. She can't tell why, isn't fully aware of the narrative here, but she can tell that dream-Amy has an instinct. Something is causing her to get out of bed, walk towards their bathroom and grab a pregnancy test - one of the cheap paper strip ones - from a visible spot in the bathroom cabinet. Something is making her take it. Dream-Amy watches the test, sitting perched on the toilet and staring intently at the first line, and after what feels like the blink of an eye inside of her dream-reality, a second, faint but clear, line shows up.

Even though it's a dream, the explosive happiness is every bit as real as if she'd been awake. She takes the paper strip, wrapping it in a bit of toilet paper, and is about to go ask dream-Jake if he can see it too when she’s pulled out of the dream and back to reality.

“What the hell,” she mumbles as she opens her eyes. Jake and Leah are still sleeping, and it's every bit as dark outside as when they went to bed, but Amy's wide awake and officially weirded out. She's never been one for dream analysis or seeing them as omens of any kind, but something about the realistic feeling has caught her attention, leaving her confused and wondering if there’s any truth to it. She tries to repeat to herself that there isn’t, she isn’t pregnant and should go back to sleep, but her mind is reeling. She tries to do some breathing exercises to force her mind and body back to a relaxed state, but it’s out of reach. The what if-narrative plays on repeat in her head, and eventually, she accepts that she’s going to need to at least outrule the possibility. She’s pretty sure there’s a spare test left somewhere in her bag.

Carefully, she frees herself from the three-year-old’s grip and climbs over Jake instead. He grunts and opens his eyes for a second, but closes them again in the next.

 Amy uses her phone’s flashlight to dig through the contents of her bag, finding her calendar, pencil case, notebooks, and a crossword magazine. Headphones, painkillers, an extra phone charger. More snack bars and packets of dried fruit. Wet wipes, tissues, hair ties, and some makeup. She moves on to the inner pocket, finding allergy medication, tampons, even an expired condom that seems to have nestled its way into the bottom of the bag and stayed there for years, but no spare pregnancy tests. She almost thinks she’s found one, but a closer look tells her it’s an ovulation indicator, and she groans with disappointment. She could have sworn she left one for emergencies, but suddenly it’s gone, and she could wait until tomorrow and buy one, but she wants - scratch that, she needs - to know now.

 “Ames? Are you looking for something?” Jake’s voice is raspy, a mix of surprise and pure confusion in his tone, and she hums vaguely without looking back at him.

“I thought I had something in here,” she says in a whisper. “But I can’t find it. It’s nothing, you can go back to sleep.”

“What’re you tryna find?”

She sighs. “I had a weird dream, okay? So I want to take a pregnancy test, because I just need to know it wasn't real so I can go to sleep. I thought I had one in here, but I don’t, so…”

He yawns, and then, in a movement far swifter than she would expect from someone barely-awake, he gets out of bed and walks over to the plastic bag he brought home from the sneaker outlet.

“Jake, I’m sorry, but I don’t care about your sneakers right now,” she wheezes. He shakes his head and brings out another, smaller CVS plastic bag.

“I know,” he says, “but you might care about this.” He throws her a familiar, pink-and-white carton, and she’s not even caught it before she knows exactly what it is.

“You bought a pregnancy test.”

He nods.

“What - when - why?”

“There was a CVS close to the outlet, I told Julian and Simon I needed to buy some Aspirin, ran in and got this. They didn’t see it,” he assures her, noticing the worry on her face. “I was smooth. And as for why - I know you said you didn’t want to hope, but I thought in case you changed your mind and wanted to know, well... “ He shrugs. “It would suck if you were stuck here with no way of finding out, even if it was just another day. I know how much you hate not knowing.”

She twists the carton in her hands. “I really do hate it.”

“So, are you…”

“I’m going to take it. Now.”

“Now - now?”

“Now.”

 There’s a beat of silence, and then they’re silently racing each other out the door.

 Amy’s so used to the steps at this point, she doesn’t even feel the anxiety kick in until she places the test on the sink and nods at Jake to start the timer. There’s barely space for them both to sit on the floor of the tiny bathroom, so they’re squeezed together, him stroking her hair and holding her hand as she focuses on keeping her breathing steady.

It doesn't matter what it shows, she tries to tell herself without success. It’s just to check.

And yet, there's this odd sense of hope in her heart she doesn't recognize from the last months.

 “How did you guess?” She asks Jake, and he wrinkles his forehead, so she clarifies. “You remembered all the symptoms.”

“Oh.” He blushes. “This is going to sound bad, but… do you remember before we found out you were pregnant with Lee? There was like a week before you took a test, where you kept complaining about how it felt like you were getting the flu, or some kind of infection, because you were feeling off.” He draws quotation marks with his fingers. “You kept repeating that. And I was so proud of myself, because I'm always the first one of us two to get sick, but I was feeling fine. I thought I’d finally get to brag, and I was so excited, but then we found out you weren't sick.”

“Just pregnant.”

“Yeah.” He smiles. “Which, of course, was so much better. Except I never got to brag. It's haunted me since then. So this time, when you said you were feeling off and like you were getting sick… I remembered, and I made a guess. Also, I’ve read the list in your binder. But honestly, it was mostly the first thing.”

Amy laughs, genuine and hearty despite her nervosity. “You're ridiculous.”

He puts his arm around her shoulders. “And yet you keep wanting to have kids with me.”

“It’s like I must be in love with you or something.”

Her comment makes him snicker, and she thinks, not for the first time, that there could never be another person she'd want to do this with - no matter the results on that test.

 The timer rings. Jake turns it off.

“Do you want to check, or should I?”

“I don't think I can see another negative test,” she whispers, the fear making her heart beat out of her chest, and he nods and tells her to close her eyes. She hears him fumble for the test, and then he finds it, and there’s a moment’s silence that drives her crazy.

    “Ames?”

    “Yeah?”

    “What’d you say two lines meant, now again?”

    She opens her eyes, immediately snatching the test from his hands. “No way.”

    It’s faint, but there’s an obvious second line.

Amy just stares at it. She's worried it’ll disappear, like her mind’s playing tricks on her, but it stays.

“This is crazy.” Tears of happiness flood her eyes once she speaks. “This is - this is absolutely insane.”

“Told you so,” says Jake in an attempt of sounding smug, but she can tell he’s about to tear up, too.

“This is positive.”

“Sure is.”

“Oh my god.” She can’t tell if she’s laughing or crying, but she’s shaking, unable to believe her eyes as she looks from the test to Jake and back at the test. “Oh my god, you’re going to brag about this forever.”

He grins. “Consider the fact that I won’t to be a testament to how much I love you.”

She’s too overwhelmed to know what to say, so she just hugs him, smiling into his chest as he peppers kisses to the top of her head.

“Hey, Ames?”

“What?”

“We’re having another baby.”

She’s spent a year wishing for it, getting used to the thought in her desperation to get there, yet his words are impossible to take in. Another baby.

“Seems that way,” she whispers, and he laughs.

 There’s a second test in the carton, and Amy wants to take it right away, but Jake convinces her to save it for tomorrow so they can go back to bed before anyone notices they’ve been occupying this bathroom for a suspicious amount of time.

She doesn’t think she’ll be able to sleep, not when a thousand thoughts are running laps in her head and she’s so in shock she thinks she might still be dreaming, but then Jake’s hand sneaks under the hem of her t-shirt and rests low on her stomach to make sure they're warm, he mumbles, and she places her own hand over his and relaxes.

 ~

  november.

Logically, Amy knows she’s pregnant.

All of the tests, a new one every day even though Jake tells her she’s being crazy again, are coming back two dark lines and plus signs and bolded words Pregnant, and the expensive test with the week indicator which shows how long it’s been since ovulation changes from 1-2 to 2-3 and 3+ Weeks. The fertility clinic gives her a blood test, confirms it’s a healthy pregnancy and schedules an early ultrasound two weeks later, which feels like an eternity. Time is moving excruciatingly slow, even slower when the nausea fully kicks in and she wants to spend as much of the day as possible laying down. She’s secretly happy she’s feeling terrible because that means the hormone levels are rising, and Jake insists on high-fiving her after the first time she throws up, but it does make the days feel even longer when all she wants is for them to pass.

Emotionally, the knowledge is much more difficult to wrap her head around. She’s terrified, analyzing every minuscule shift in her body in fear of there being something wrong and checking for blood in her underwear several times a day. She’s short on distractions, because she’s exhausted and moving too much makes her feel sick, so she’s mostly stuck on the couch after work watching movies and cuddling with Leah. They're not telling her yet - they're not telling anyone, except Rosa who figured it out soon as Amy declined a tequila shot - and Amy feels like a shitty parent who doesn't have the energy to run around and properly play with her kid right now, but Leah seems to get that her mom’s not feeling well, because she's more than happy to read books together and watch iPad until Jake comes home and takes her to the park for a bit.

 She wants to be happy, and every time she adds another positive test to the growing collection, she is, but she’s also dreaming nightmares and waking up in cold sweats in fear that this will be taken away from them. It’s too good to be true, the kind of happy ending you read about but never experience, and she can’t for the life of her try to fathom that it’s real. In short, she’s so hormonal she cries at stubbing her toe in the doorway, so nauseous she has to force down the few things she can consider eating, feeling guilty over how little energy she has to give Leah and how much responsibility this puts on Jake, and she can’t even allow herself to trust that they are having another baby.

 “This isn’t forever,” Jake tells her on a particularly exhausting evening after she's cried in his arms and eaten three lemon popsicles because they're the only thing that tastes remotely good. When she's cried a little more, about her fear and bad conscience and the deep shame in not being able to feel happy about something she's dreamt of for a year, he tells her, “just three more days until the scan,” and that does help.

-

 Amy doesn’t want to exaggerate, but she’s pretty sure the hours between six a.m., when Leah wakes up, and nine a.m., when the ultrasound appointment is, are the longest three hours of her life. Mornings are enough of a struggle to get through with a stubborn three-year-old who’ll put up a fight about anything from clothes to breakfast to brushing her teeth if she’s in the wrong mood, and they’re not made any easier when Amy’s feeling like this, but it’s moving particularly slow today when nearly all of her focus is divided between worrying about the scan and trying to keep her breakfast down. In the end, Leah doesn’t brush her teeth this morning and she has a yogurt smoothie in the car, but they manage to drop her off in time and she gives them a long hug each, so Amy considers it a success.

 Unfortunately, it’s a temporary one. She’s so nervous she can’t think straight, can’t focus on the Taylor Swift-tunes playing in the car or reply when Jake asks if she’s excited. Her head is playing possible nightmare scenarios on a loop, of there not being anything there, of them not seeing a heartbeat, or something else that will leave them no choice but to terminate the pregnancy. Taylor Swift sings something about cloaks and daggers and bright mornings, and Amy tries to see if she can memorize the lyrics for a distraction. She doesn’t get far before they get stuck in a traffic jam, though, giving them no option but to drive a few feet at a time, accelerating and braking on repeat.

 She knows that Jake tries to drive as smoothly as possible. He’s a good driver. She doesn’t have a problem with his driving, but the constant starting and stopping, the inevitable jerking movements, is absolute hell for her morning slash all-day sickness and suddenly all her focus has shifted to trying not to throw up in a moving car.

“I’m really sorry, Ames,” says Jake after casting one glance at her pale complexion, and she doesn’t dare to move her head but she mumbles a ‘not your fault’ before she goes back to taking deep breaths.

 She makes it through the congestion, and the nausea’s easing as they drive the last stretch to the clinic, but then there’s a slight bump as they drive into the parking lot and the fight is lost. She stumbles out of the car in search of a trash can, but it’s too far away. Instead, she has to publicly humiliate herself by throwing up right there on the curb just as another couple is walking out of the clinic and giving her what she assumes are grossed-out looks. She feels Jake’s hands on her shoulders as she coughs up the last bit, grimacing at the foul taste.

“Everyone’s going to think I’m hungover,” she mutters as he leads her to a spot further away, urging her to sit down.

“Oh yeah. That’s definitely what they think about all the women who puke outside of fertility clinics.”

His comment makes her laugh, but the laughter makes her feel sick again, so she stops.

“You okay?” He asks, carefully scratching her neck with one hand as he digs in his messenger bag with the other. “I have water if you want to rinse your mouth, and I’m pretty sure I have gum somewhere.”

“I’ll take water,” she says, accepting the green kid-size bottle that was definitely originally Leah’s and taking a cautious sip. “Sorry about this.”

“You’re sorry?” He lifts an eyebrow. “Damn, queen of unnecessary apologies. It’s okay.”

“I feel like crap,” she groans, ignoring him. “Sorry for whining.” “Okay there, ridiculous. Stop apologizing. It’s not something you can control.”

“But I don’t want to whine about this,” it comes out of her before she can stop it. “I don’t want to be sad, or scared. We fought so damn hard to get here! It fucking sucked! And now - I guess we’re having a baby, but I don’t know how to believe that, and I have to deal with the fact that pregnancy sucks, too!” She shakes her head, instantly regretting the quick movement but continuing to speak anyway. “I just want to be happy, and grateful, and I am. But I’m terrified. I can’t trust that it’s really happening, that it won’t be taken away from us again, and on top of that I feel awful all the time. I just… thought it’d be different.”

 Jake looks a little taken aback by her sudden outburst, opening his mouth before closing it and watching her with that same worried look she’s seen way too much during the last weeks.

“It will be,” he promises once she stops talking. “You’ve done this before. You know it gets better. You get a baby out of it, which - there are worse deals.”

“Yeah. But it feels so far away. It doesn’t feel remotely real. I wanted us to be happy now, to relax and enjoy this, but it feels like everything sucks.”

“Isn’t that just life sometimes, though? It sucks, and then there are awesome parts, and then it sucks again, and then there’s more awesome stuff.” He grimaces, looking down at the curb before meeting her eyes. “I know you feel like crap. I know you’re scared. Honestly, so am I. But we’re about to see our baby for the first time,” he smiles, “and that’s at least one of the crazy awesome parts.”

She nods. “It is.”

“Yeah.” He reaches for her hand, squeezing it. “I just think that… there’s always going to be shitty things, right? Sure, this year was rough, and I wouldn’t want to do it again, but we also had a million amazing moments with Leah, and together, in-between the bad parts. When this baby comes,” he nods to her still-flat stomach, “we probably won’t be sleeping and everything will be nuts for a while before we figure it out, but we’re going to have two kids and it’s going to be the best.”

“I know.”

“I’m going to tell you something I heard from a very smart person once,” he grins, looking proud of himself. “Life is unpredictable, but as long as you’re with the right people, you can handle anything.”

“That person sounds smart. Did they also make a butt joke after that?”

“Sure did. Made me cry, and everything. But what I was actually trying to say was…” Jake blushes, and she can tell there’s a moment of emotional sincerity coming. “I’m with you. I know that. I also know that as long as I’m with you, all the bad stuff is survivable, and all the good stuff is a million times better. And I’d rather have hard days with you, and Lee, and I guess soon whoever this is,” he holds his hand to her stomach through her sweater, “than good days with anyone else.”

“Me too,” she snivels, having to wipe the tears on her shirt sleeve because of course, this is making her cry. “How’d you get so wise all of a sudden?”

“Married you,” he shrugs. “And had kids. Also, I got hella old.”

“You’re forty-two.”

“Exactly. Shh.”

Amy laughs, with tears in her eyes because he’s hitting that perfect spot between wisdom and humor that’s one of the many reasons she loves him so much, and the smile on his lips grows wider once he sees that he’s made her laugh.

“I love you so much,” she whispers, cupping his face with her hands.

“I know. Love you, too.” She kisses him, and he kisses her back for a second before immediately pulling away and scrunching his nose. “Okay, ew, no. Vomity breath. Gross.”

“I thought I wasn’t supposed to apologize,” she teases. “But I’ll take that gum too.”

“Let’s just go inside and look at our baby,” he says as he hands her the packet, and she doesn’t protest.

 There are some routine questions and another blood test, and then they’re ushered into the ultrasound room. She’s nearly holding her breath as she lays down, eyes glued to the screen and Jake’s hand squeezing hers so tight she thinks he might stop the blood flow if he squeezed any harder.

At first, she’s scared she was right and there’s nothing in there, because everything is blurry and she’s not sure what’s what, but then it clears slightly and the ultrasound technician points out a white blob the shape of a lima bean, and there are tears of relief running down her cheeks.

 The technician says and here’s the heartbeat, and Amy has to clasp a hand over her mouth to keep from crying harder than she already is when a whoosh-whoosh-whoosh-whoosh-whoosh sounds through the room in quick little beats.

She could listen to that sound forever.

 They get printed sonogram pictures of their fetus, which is slightly over an inch and just looks like a white blob but is well and truly perfect according to their doctor, and then they’re advised to go home and celebrate. They both have to stop crying first, though, so they stand outside the clinic for another while, just hugging without needing to say anything else.

 “So,” Jake says when Amy’s finally found space to breathe again. “How do you want to celebrate?”

“Do you want to go to Target and look for another shirt that says Big Sister and some stupid cute tiny clothes?”

“Oh, you know I do.”

 They get a long-sleeved pink shirt for Leah, six pairs of baby socks with animals on them and tiny pajamas with rainbow stripes, and then they buy alcohol-free champagne.

 ~

#my writing #b99 #brooklyn 99 #brooklyn nine-nine #peraltiago #jake x amy #b99 fic #brooklyn 99 fic #brooklyn nine-nine fic #b99 fanfiction #brooklyn nine-nine fanfiction #jake x amy fic #jake x amy fanfiction #peraltiago fic #peraltiago fanfiction #iwthwy

[13-reasons-ideas]

Finding Peace in Another Part 17

I’m so sorry for the break you guys. Life got in the way and then I had writers block because Monty was being a cranky cranky man and not giving me any information as to what was going on in his head. This chapter went differently than I expected but it turned out really well I think. TW: discussion of the aftermath of death and suicide. Please note the ways of dealing with death in this chapter are from my personal experience and they vary from person to person. Feedback is appreciated. Much love!

Word count: 2640

I met him at home after school and we spent a relaxing hour or so making dinner, joking around with each other. It was nice that after the last few days, we were able to fall back into the lighter side of our relationship. From the way he wrapped his arms around me when I stirred the pots and pans to the soft hip checks while we prepped ingredients, we seemed to be falling back into our usual habits. Our silence was once again comfortable rather than tense and awkward as it was this morning.

I deliberated when to bring up dinner with Scott while we cooked as well as when to ask what Zach had said to him earlier. As we sat down to eat, I decided to broach the Scott topic first and deal with his temper rather than have a civil conversation and then rile his temper again. I began cutting my pork tenderloin as I again deliberated how to best broach Scott and my plans for tomorrow evening. He took another bite and I decided to take my chances at that moment, “hey so this morning Scott walked me to class and we made plans to go for dinner at Rosie’s after practice tomorrow.” I said casually. Monty coughed slightly before he took a second to ensure what he heard is in fact what I said. His face set into a blank stare.

“Why? And when exactly were these plans made?”

“Because he asked me, and I want to go. Like I said, this morning when he walked me to class. You were cooling off and talking to Zach about stuff.” I replied in a bored tone while I pushed my food around.

“Do you know why he asked you Becks? Did you consider my feelings when you agreed?”

“Uh, I guess because he can?” I replied, trying to keep my tone in check. I ignored the latter question, which he didn’t seem too pleased with.

He sighed before responding again, “Well did you? Or do you not remember when we talked about if we are exclusive?” His tone was beginning to become clipped again. Jeeze. Its dinner. Its sandwiches for crying out oud.

“I remember, yes. What I don’t remember is agreeing to not see people of the opposite sex outside of school. Which, might I add, you don’t seem to have an issue with when it’s Tony or Justin and Clay. You don’t even comment when I go to Alex’s place anymore. What makes Scott so different?” I knew I was egging him on but at this point I didn’t care.

“Because Becca, it’s Scott. He’s my best friend.” He told me, as if that explained anything.

“So? He’s my friend too. It’s just dinner Monty, it doesn’t mean anything.” I countered.

“Does he know that?” He asked, his brow arched. So that’s what this is about.

“Yes Montgomery, he does. Besides, I think he’s beginning to suspect something is going on between us. If he’s your best friend, do you really think he would make a move if he even suspected there was something going on between you and I?”

He made a noncommittal sound and was silent as he ate for a moment. His silence only intensified my annoyance. “You know, I only told you because it’s courtesy. I didn’t have to tell you at all.” I told him shortly. He dropped his fork and looked at the ceiling shaking his head.

“That’s not the point Rebecca. You really don’t think Scott has a thing for you? Because he does. We talked about you before you and I became a thing.”

“Okay? Well I have some news for you. If I was interested in Scott like that, I would be with Scott. But I’m not interested him like that. I’m interested in you Monty. I like you.” I huffed. He sighed but did not continue. “I thought you would be happy I’m trying to get to know your friends. I don’t think Scott would make a move or anything if he suspects we have a thing.”

Monty was silent for a while as we ate, the only sound was the metallic scrape of our cutlery against the tempered glass plates.

The silence was beginning to get to me, so I decided to be the bigger person and apologize first, “look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to catch you off guard and spring it on you. It’s honestly just a dinner between friends. He knows I’m not interested in being anything more than friends with him. And besides, it’s you I am coming home to at the end of the night.”

Monty didn’t look up from his plate but I caught a small smile, which he tried to hide. My man and his lack of ability to emote. He really is adorable. “Okay. I’m sorry I snapped at you. I just wasn’t expecting that. I trust you.” Woah. It was my turn to be taken aback. He had never actually said that to me before. Sure, he had done things to show that he trusted me, but he had never said it outright, in as many words. I wasn’t sure what to say so I reached out and took his hand, squeezing it a couple of times, firmly. He looked up then and smiled a very shy smile at me.

“I trust you too. Completely.”

The Scott situation now sorted; we finished our meals in a once again comfortable silence.

It wasn’t until after we were relaxing on the couch that I brought up the fight this morning and what he and Zach talked about. “Monty? Can we talk about what happened this morning? With Tyler and Zach?”

Monty sighed and I was worried I pressed too hard too soon. “We can talk I guess, yeah.”

“Okay. Do you want to tell me what the fighting was about?” I asked, moving to sit so I could face him.

“Nothing really. Like I said at lunch, I was in a bad mood.”

“So you gave Tyler and them a hard time because…?”

“They were there? I don’t know. I can’t take it out on you or the guys so I don’t know what else you expected? I go talk to Porter? I’m not sure if you have noticed, but the guy isn’t the greatest at his job.”

“No, I don’t expect you to talk to Porter. But you could have talked to me. Or Zach. Or Scott, if you left out the me being your girlfriend thing. Or hell, if it meant you would have talked to him about it, tell him about us.”

“I could have talked to you? And said what?”

“I-I don’t know Monty. That’s the thing. I don’t know what’s going on in your head. I’m trying to understand. But I can’t do that if you don’t let me in. You tell me whatever you need to tell me. I’m here for you. No matter what. You can tell me anything.”

Monty sat silently for a whole five minutes, absorbing what I was telling him. Finally, he spoke, “Okay. I guess… yesterday was a lot of information Rebeca. When I asked about a shirt that morning and you said… I just wasn’t exactly expecting that to be the situation. And I don’t want to call it a situation because that’s not what it is. I really don’t want to say the wrong thing here. And I know you’re probably sick of hearing this from everyone, but I am sorry for what happened and your loss. So trying to process and make sense of that was a lot. And then Zach just showing up kind of… set me off? I knew I couldn’t really do anything about it then, but I also knew it was only a matter of time before I snapped.”

I nodded and put my hand on his knee, urging him to continue. This is good. He’s talking. When he didn’t, I decided to speak up, “that is all fair but Montgomery, you can’t just hit people or lash out when you have an emotional response to something. It’s not healthy.”

“I know. And I am trying, I swear. It’s just hard. But anyway, I didn’t know how to react or what to say to you. And I knew you and Zach were close, I guess it just never occurred to me that you were quite that close. He has a freaking key to your house Becks. Before you say anything yes, I understand why, and you explained it well enough yesterday. That’s not the point. The point is it was a shock and I didn’t know how to process it. So yeah. I lashed out. And it just happened that Tyler and them were around and hell, they’re easy targets. The kid doesn’t fight back. So I took it out on them.”

“Alright well, I guess that makes sense. Chad said it wasn’t as bad as it normally was. Is that because of me?”

“I mean, I guess yeah. You… you make me want to be better. No one has ever made me feel this way. You make me feel so… important. I matter to you.”

I nodded, afraid that if I tried to speak that I would cry. I took a moment to collect myself before asking the question that had been plaguing my mind all day, “What did Zach say to you this morning? I saw him pull you aside after you took a breather. I wanted to ask earlier but I never got the chance.”

“Oh that. He just explained some stuff to me is all. Helped put things in perspective.” I nodded again, wondering if he would continue. “Do you really want to know what he said?”

“Yes.”

“Alright then. He told me to get my shit together first, but then he explained some of what he went through when his dad died. The closest thing I can compare your loss to is maybe when Jeff died, but even then, it’s not the same. That team is my family and he was my brother but it’s different than what you went through.”

“I’ve never said it before and I know I didn’t know him and he was before my time, but I really am sorry that he died.” I interjected, feeling a need to say something, anything to convey my feelings for him, to show him that he isn’t wrong to trust me. He smiled at me before continuing.

“Zach explained that you not telling me about Jake and what happened, wasn’t because you don’t trust me or that I did something wrong, but because you are still working through it in your own way. I knew it wasn’t an easy thing to talk to people about. He said that when you lose someone suddenly, it’s something that knocks you off kilter and you need to work harder to right yourself than when you expect it in some ways. I’m scared I’m going to say the wrong thing here so if I do, I don’t mean to but I’m just going to say it. The most experience I’ve had with,” he paused, unsure of how to continue or how to phrase his thoughts in a kind way.

“You can say it. It’s not a dirty word. It’s a fact. It was suicide.” I cut in.

“Right. I wasn’t sure. The most experience I’ve had with suicide was Hannah Baker and if I’m being honest, it didn’t really affect me that much. I didn’t like her. I didn’t care to know her when she was alive, so it was just… a thing to me. I know people deal with death in their own ways. Zach explained to me that part of how you process it and deal with it, is by not talking about it. Or when you do talk about it, you’re very blunt about it. When I asked if it was like you were moving on, he said no. You just see it as a fact that cannot be changed, so there is no need to tiptoe around it. Which is fair. Not… not that a different way of processing it is not fair as well. Just….” He stopped and looked at me, scared that he had just ruined everything.

“No, no its okay. I know what you mean. Zach is right. We have talked about it in the past and I think that’s part of why we connected and got along so well. We have both experienced tremendous and unspeakable loss, that can’t be explained or understood by other people. He lost his dad, I lost my mom and my brother. Losing her sucked but I had Jake to help me get through it. And then I lost Jake and suddenly I didn’t have my person anymore. My friends and stuff tried to understand and talk to me about it, but the only person I wanted to talk about losing Jake with was Jake. And the thing is, for Zach and you and the team, his dad and Jeff died in car wrecks. Still extremely tragic. I hate that he lost his dad and that you lost your friend and its awful. But when someone dies in a car wreck or they’re sick or anything like that, people don’t have opinions on it. But when someone commits suicide, suddenly everyone has an opinion they want to share with you. The first reaction in both situations is ‘I’m sorry for your loss.’ With a wreck, the next question is ‘can I bring you a casserole?’, with a suicide, the second question or comment is along the lines of ‘the person was selfish and didn’t think about their family or friends’ or, and someone did in fact say this to me, ‘you’re better off it seems like. Now they won’t bring you down with their mood.’ As though my brother didn’t just die, and my dad didn’t just lose his son. The grief and pain you feel, gets minimized and discounted because of people’s perceptions and preconceived notions about suicide and mental health. That’s part of why I don’t tell people. Like I said last night, it’s not because you have ever made it seem like that is how you would react or anything, it’s just in my experience, that’s what happens.” I explained, hoping I conveyed my point appropriately. He nodded at me and checked his watch before standing up and leaning down to place a kiss to my lips and pull me off the couch with him.

“As much as I don’t want to leave right now, I should probably head home soon baby girl.”

“Okay.”

He pulled me into his chest and enveloped my tiny frame in his arms. He placed a gentle kiss to the top of my head.

“Thank you for explaining stuff to me today.” I spoke into his chest, my voice coming out muffled against his shirt.

“No problem. And I’m sorry for making the Scott thing such a big deal, even if I’m not exactly thrilled at the idea, I understand you have your own friends too.” Montgomery took a step back before leaning down and kissing me deeply. “I should get going before my mom sends the cavalry to find me.”

“I know. Just wish you didn’t have to. My bed is so cold without you now.”

“I know Becks.” He hugged me tightly again, before we walked to the door together. “I’ll see you in the morning. Our spot?”

“With a black coffee with your name on it, promise.” After we parted, I watched him drive down the street and got myself ready for bed, thinking of just how important the last few days were going to be to our relationship going forward.

#finding peace in another #monty x reader #monty de la Cruz fanfic #monty imagine #montgomery de la cruz imagine #montgomery de la cruz x reader #montgomery de la cruz #montgomery de la cruz x oc #monty x oc #13 reasons why #fanfiction #fanfic #trigger warning #FEEDBACK PLEASE #zach dempsey #Please be kind #please be respectful