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just-dreaming-marvel · 2 years

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The Bond Between Us ~ 45

THE BOND BETWEEN US MASTERLIST

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Word Count: 2,765ish

Summary: You are tortured and seen as a prize to those who run the Empire. Obi-Wan spends his days working and watching Luke.

Warnings: torture, unwanted touching, loss of hope

You quickly found out that Vader cared more about finding Obi-Wan than Tarkin did and that Tarkin simply enjoyed torturing you. It was clear that you were his prize. For some reason, they weren’t willing to kill you just yet but they also weren’t questioning you too bad when it came to finding Obi-Wan’s location.

The torture varied from day to day. Sometimes it was starving you or using electric spears or toxic gas to try and suffocate you. Other times it was electric whips or Darth Vader’s use of the Force. Even with your increasingly weakening state, Vader could not penetrate your mind. He would often quickly grow frustrated, choking you until you passed out and then storming out of the room.

You were ever-growing weaker, and you knew that much of it was because you had broken your bond with Obi-Wan. The bond gave you so much more strength than you ever realized until it was gone and you were dealing with the torture yourself.

During meetings with the Emperor and his council, that included Tarkin and Vader, you would be dragged out. You were tortured in front of the men, proving to them how weak the Jedi were and for simply entertainment. The Emperor was hardly ever physically in attendance, but when he was, he would join in the torture with Force lightning. Sometimes, after the meeting was over and you were basically out of it, the men would be allowed to touch you. They never were allowed to go very far, everything happening over your clothes, but it was still unwanted and would throw you back into the memories of your rape.

Proving to you that Anakin was still deep down inside of Darth Vader, he was the one who would stop the other men from going further than touching you over your clothes. You were thankful for even that little bit of kindness.

Your torture went on like this for years. Eventually, since you were refusing to give no information about anything that had to do with Obi-Wan, the Emperor ordered you to be moved to the Fortress Inquisitorius. There, there was a tomb of Jedi and other Force-sensitive beings. You were thrown in a room near the tomb to basically be forgotten about except for when some of the Inquisitors needed to have some fun.

One day, a younger Inquisitor entered your small prison. You looked up from where you lay on the ground, unimpressed.

“Get up,” the woman demanded. You didn’t move. “I said,” the Inquisitor began choking you with the Force and pulling you off the ground, “get up.”

The Inquisitor set you down on your feet and let the pressure around your neck go. You started coughing, almost falling to the ground again when the woman pinned you against the wall.

“Tell me where Kenobi is,” she demanded.

“They’ve kept me as a prisoner for nine years,” you replied, clearly exhausted, “and I have never once said anything… what makes you think you’re so special?”

“So you do know something?”

“I.. never said… that.” Breathing was hard, having no medical care done to you in the last nine years was taking its toll.

“It’s clear that you are not his weakness, like once believed to be. He would have come after you by now, to save you if you were.”

“You know… nothing… about me and Obi-Wan.”

“Oh, really?” She laughed as her hand came up to toy with the ring around your neck. “Then what is this?” You glared at her, unresponding. “If you are not enough to draw Kenobi out of hiding, I need to know what is.”

“I am afraid… you are speaking something quite impossible…”

“I am not so sure. Everyone has a weakness. And I will find Kenobi’s, whether you help me or not.”

You studied the woman in front of you, feeling something familiar about her. “Do I know you?”

She scoffed. “You’re not so powerful as everyone believes.”

“Or maybe… this is me showing my power… that this has always been the plan… me being captured and tortured… to allow others a chance…”

She growled. “I will have Kenobi and I will bring him to Vader, if it is the last thing I do.”

~~~

It had been almost nine years since Obi-Wan felt you last—since your bond was severed. Since then, Obi-Wan’s hope and ability with the Force slowly faded. He kept himself busy with work and watching over Luke, never making any friends or willingly interacting with more people than he had to. Without you connected to him, guiding him, he realized that they had really lost. The time of the Jedi was over. What kept him watching over Luke was making sure that the Empire didn’t find the boy if he became Force-sensitive. And he couldn’t handle disappointing you. Even if he believed you were to be dead.

It took years for him to recover from the pain of the bond being severed. Obi-Wan still wasn’t fully recovered. Due to the amount of pain he had felt, he was convinced that you were dead. It was the only thing that made sense to him.

His lonely nights in the cave in which he lived were the hardest. His dreams were filled with you and Anakin—mostly surrounding the fall of the Republic and the Jedi Order. Obi-Wan would often wake suddenly, calling out for you or his old Master, Qui-Gon Jinn. Before Obi-Wan had left Yoda ten years old, Yoda had told Obi-Wan that Qui-Gon had training for him and yet, nothing had happened over the span of ten years, leaving him continually disappointed.

Tonight was no different. Obi-Wan’s mind relived memory after memory, ending when you leaving him behind on Bail’s ship. He inhaled sharply and he woke suddenly. Breathing heavily, he looked around his cave, silently wishing you would just appear to comfort him. He sat up from his mat and ran his hand through his now longer hair. Glancing up at the ceiling, he called out.

“Master Qui-Gon.” He was met with silence. “Master?” Again silence. “Y/N.” He tried. “Please, little star…” Nothing.

Obi-Wan sighed, his head falling into his hands as he was at a loss of what to do.

~~~

The next day, he didn’t have to work. Obi-Wan decided that he would check on Luke. He rode his Eopie over to his usual spot close to the Lars moisture farm. Climbing onto a small ledge, he got his binoculars out and watched as Owen and Luke worked together. Eventually, Luke ran off somewhere. Owen began to worry.

“Luke?” The man called. “Luke!”

Obi-Wan began to widen his scope, trying to see if he could find Luke.

“Luke!” Owen shouted.

“Did he go back inside?” Beau asked, coming to her husband.

“He’s run off. Luke?”

Obi-Wan caught sight of Luke on the other side of the home entrance. He was on top of the dome building with goggles on, pretending he was flying a ship. Slowly, the hand Obi-Wan was using to hold up the binoculars fell to his lap. He was stuck in the past as an image of a younger Anakin doing the same thing filled it. He couldn’t help but feel saddened by the sight before him, thinking about what could have been.

Once night had fallen, Obi-Wan rode his Eopie over to the Lars’ and left a bag with a gift for Luke on the doorstep. He wanted to do what he could—what he knew you would have done. Then he snuck off and back onto his Eopie. He was riding it home when he heard rustling and could sense that someone was following him.

“Master,” a younger man stumbled out in front of him. “I thought I saw you in the town, but I wasn’t sure. I didn’t think you’d survived.”

“You’re making some kind of mistake,” Obi-Wan responded, trying to make it clear that this interaction was unwanted.

“I’m sorry, my name is Nari.” Nari pulled out his lightsaber. “Um, there’s no mistake.”

“You’re looking for somebody else.”

“What are you doing here, Obi-Wan?”

“My name is Ben.”

“Come on, please. Please… you have no idea what I’ve been through.”

Looking at the young man, Obi-Wan knew Nari wouldn’t leave easily. He commanded his Eopie to lay down and Obi-Wan rushed off of him and over to Nari.

“You must leave,” Obi-Wan stated. “You’ll draw too much attention.”

“But I have nowhere to go,” Nari replied. “They’re hunting me. You have to help me.”

Obi-Wan glanced at Nari’s hands and took the lightsaber from them. “You want me help? Take this. Walk into the middle of the desert and bury it in the ground. Stay hidden. Live a normal life.” He pushed the lightsaber back into Nari’s hands and turned to leave.

“What about the people that need us? What about the fight?”

Obi-Wan turned back to Nari. “The fight is done. We lost.” He got back on his Eopie.

“What happened to you? You were once a great Jedi.”

“The time of the Jedi is over.” He commanded his Eopie to stand. “Go back to the town. Let it go.”

~~~

After another long day of work, Obi-Wan found himself walking through town to reach his Eopie so that he could head home. He had just arrived when something clattered at his feet. He looked to see it was the gift he had left for Luke. His eyes moved up to see Owen standing there.

“I want you to stay away from him,” Owen demanded. “We don’t need anything from you, Ben,”

“It’s just a toy,” Obi-Wan responded as he picked it up.

“It’s a lot more than that.”

“There’s more to life than your farm, Owen. He needs to see that. There’s a whole galaxy out there.” Obi-Wan came closer to the man.

“I’m asking you to leave us alone, Ben. I mean it.” Owen turned to leave.

“Is he okay?”

Owen turned around, clearly irritated. “You don’t care if he’s okay. You care if he’s showing.”

“He’s my responsibility, Owen.”

“I’m his uncle.”

“We talked about this. When the time comes, he must be trained?”

“Like you trained his father?” Obi-Wan fell silent. “Like how his aunt was trained?”

“Y/N is no part of this—“

“Anakin is dead, Ben, and I won’t let you make the same mistake twice. So, leave him on the farm with his family, where he belongs.” Owen walked away.

~~~

After Owen had left, Inquisitors appeared and were threatening people for knowledge of Jedi whereabouts. A female one, Reva, threatened Owen. Eventually, the Inquisitors disappeared into an alleyway. Obi-Wan quickly left town and back to his cave for safety. He was sitting outside of his cave, watching over the desert, when a device began beeping from inside the cave. Slowly, he stood up and walked over to where the noise was coming from. It was in a chest, buried down within it. The device was for emergencies, the Organa’s having the matching one.

When he finally gained the courage to answer it, Obi-Wan was quickly informed that Leia had been taken.

“We don’t know who it was,” Bail’s hologram said, his wife standing at his side. “No ransom, no leads, Whoever they are, they knew where she would be. They… they were waiting.” Bail cleared his throat, clearly getting emotional.

“She needs you, Obi-Wan,” Breha said. “We don’t know how to get ahold of Y/N and we can’t trust anyone else.”

“What about the Senate?” Obi-Wan asked.

“We cannot let this become public,” Bail replied. “It would draw too much attention.”

“Well, your guard then? Or a bounty hunter?”

“Only you and Y/N know how important she really is, Obi-Wan. If Leia is discovered—“

“I can’t leave here, Bail. My duty is to the boy—“

“What about your duty to his sister? She’s as important as he is.”

Obi-Wan sighed, trying to think through it all. “It’s been ten years. I’m not who I used to be... Find someone else. She’ll be better off.”

Obi-Wan ended the call. He went back out to looking at the desert. He stood with his feet shoulder-width apart and his hands behind his back as he often saw you and Anakin do. As he thought of you, he knew that you would have dropped everything to go and find Leia and would be yelling at him for not doing the same. But in the past ten years, Obi-Wan had changed. He was not connected to the Force like he used to be and was not strong enough. Besides, with the Inquisitors on Tatooine, he could not leave Luke.

~~~

After work the next day, Obi-Wan saw that Nari had been killed and hung as a show in the town. He felt bad for not helping Nari but knew it would have only cost him more. Upon arriving to his cave, the droid Obi-Wan had hidden under the sand to sense intruders to his cave glowed red. Obi-Wan was immediately on alert. He carefully entered the cave to see someone in a cloak looking out over the desert.

“She’s headed for Daiyu,” Bail stated, pulling down his hood and turning to face Obi-Wan.

“You should not have come,” Obi-Wan said.

“They hid their signature behind a freight transport. The ship is on its way there now.”

“I can’t.”

“She’s my daughter, Obi-Wan.”

“I told you… I’m not the man you remember.”

“Well, you’re going to have to be!”

“I can’t leave the boy.”

“This isn’t about the boy, and you know it! You’ve made mistakes. We all did. It’s the past. Move on. Be done with it. You couldn’t save Anakin… but you can save her.”

“And what if I can’t?”

“There is no one I trust more with my child than you and Y/N… Please, old friend. For her… One last fight.”

Obi-Wan looked away. “Y/N is dead.”

“What? How did you—“

“I felt it… nine years ago… that is why you cannot find her. She’s gone.”

“Obi-Wan… her death is not your fault. She left to protect the children and she did her part. Do not let her death be in vain.”

~~~

Bail had left before Obi-Wan climbed onto his Eopie and headed into the desert. He did so with a speed he had never before. When he reached where he wanted to, his Eopie laid down and Obi-Wan pulled out a small shovel. He knelt down and began digging. It took him a few minutes to reach the wooden box that he was looking for. He pulled it out of the hole and set it down.

Opening it, Obi-Wan looked at the canvas cloth and pulled it open. His own lightsaber stared back at him along with Anakin’s and yours. His hand reached up and held the ring dangling from his neck as if to ask you if he should go through with this. Though a part of him didn’t want to, he knew he should. He took his lightsaber out and placed it on his hip, where it used to constantly reside. He was about to close the box and rebury it when he felt something in the Force telling him to grab yours as well. With furrowed brows, Obi-Wan took your lightsaber by the hand and slowly attached it to his other hip.

Obi-Wan buried the box before heading back into town. He bought himself a ticket off the planet but stopped before he reached the ship. Looking conflicted, he twirled the ticket between his fingers.

“Well?” A woman called from a few feet ahead, noticing his conflict. “You coming or not?”

Taking a few more seconds, Obi-Wan gained the courage to walk up to the woman and turn his ticket in. With a deep breath, Obi-Wan walked forward to the ship.

~~~

Something had shifted in the Force, you could feel it. Even in your weakened state. You were close to giving in, to letting yourself be one with the Force and be free of the pain of torture. But now something was telling you to fight, to stay alive just a little bit longer. That it would all be over soon.

next chapter >

TAGLIST IS CLOSED - Taglist Information

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burnwater13 · 1 year

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So Ahsoka Tano wanted to test him, Grogu thought to himself, a little annoyed at the concept. Of what utility was that? What did she hope to learn? What would her test encompass? How long would it take? Would he need his datapad?

None of those questions were answered but Grogu was patient. He could wait to find out. After all, he’d gotten so good at pretending to sleep that Ahsoka hadn’t realized that, as soon as she started talking, he woke up long enough to hear her and be annoyed. Of course he went right back to sleep after that, annoyed or not, he was tired.

He wished he had stayed awake. He would have avoided dreaming that way. Normally, when he was with the Mandalorian, his dreams were all about piloting the Razor Crest or learning how to fly a speeder bike, or seeing Din, without his helmet blocking the view of his face. Those were pretty nice dreams.

Sometimes he even dreamed about being back on Sorgan and playing with the kids and catching frogs and eating them fresh and whole (the best way). That dream always looped back to the beginning and never included the bad stuff with the bad people. The nice lady at the tavern would give him endless cups of broth and that was pretty great too.

But this dream was different. It started with him at the Jedi Temple. It wasn’t a bad day. It wasn’t that bad day. It was a regular day. He was with the other younglings. Master Beq was there providing instructions. They were learning about the basic principals of lightsaber construction and the importance of selecting an appropriate kyber crystal. That had been a good day.

The Librarian hadn’t pinched his cheeks that day. None of the Masters had scolded him for having snacks in his floating chair. And he hadn’t been left behind by accident when they went to the courtyard for ‘play’ time, which was really ‘walk around quietly and don’t bug anyone’ time. So, overall, a good day for Grogu.

But the dream took a turn. A turn that Grogu didn’t like at all. Every time he turned around they were there. Obi-Wan, Anakin, and Ahsoka. Grogu couldn’t get away from them. They stopped by the training sessions. They popped in during meals. They told stories at bed time. It should have been fun and interesting but it wasn’t. It was awful.

It was awful because Grogu didn’t see the versions of the people he knew and met at the Jedi Temple when he was a youngling. No. The people in his dream were the older versions. The tired versions. The angry versions. The sad versions. The Darth Vader versions.

He didn’t know how that worked or why it worked that way. The Force was strange and mysterious and it liked to tell you things you wouldn’t understand for years or even a lifetime. But he knew that he didn’t like it when the Force showed him things that he didn’t want to see.

He didn’t want to see a heartbroken, tortured, Anakin. He didn’t want to see the Obi-Wan who had to give up so much of who he was to follow a path that was so hard. And he didn’t want to see Ahsoka so bitter, so angry, so full of loss that she had no way to manage it other than to hide it from everyone. Or try to hide it. You couldn’t hide anything from the Force. And the Force wanted Grogu to see it.

Was that the test then? The real test? Was the Force testing Grogu’s ability to be kind and considerate? Was it testing him to see if he could put aside his pain and suffering and recognize what had happened to others and do what was best for them? Was it checking in on him to see if he had learned enough from the Mandalorian to know that good people were everywhere and you just had to give them a chance to show you their better nature?

If that was the test, then Grogu was ready for it. Dreams or no dreams, Grogu knew that he had learned many things from Din Djarin. He had learned that found family was family. He had learned that people could change given the opportunity to do so. He had learned to trust again. He had even learned that attachment did not define you, but it defined your values. Grogu valued the people he could call friend and the Mandalorian because he called him family. Because Grogu called Din Djarin ‘Dad’.

He hoped that Ahsoka was ready to test him and he also hoped that she would learn something from the test as well. It couldn’t be easy carrying around the burdens she wouldn’t share with anyone else. At least Grogu had his dad.

#the mandalorian #grogu #din djarin #calendar prompt a day #ahsoka tano

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maulusque · 3 years

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Hey d'you know the origins of Quinlan Vos/Fox ship? I keep finding it and I'm curious if it's one of those Fan Things that took off or if they went on an adventure together at some point.

To my knowledge, they have literally never met or even been in close proximity in canon. I remember last, like, April or something @forestgreengirl went full Galaxy Brain and decided that Vox would be a thing and single-handedly paddled that canoe into fandom’s collective consciousness.

As for why they work so well together, I think it’s partially a matter of feasibility (Fox never leaves Coruscant, the only Jedi who seem to never leave Coruscant are like, really really old, but Quinlan could feasibly spend a lot of time there because he’s a Jedi Superspy and he doesn’t have his own battalion of clones (at least, not in current canon)). Quinlan shows up for his one (1) clone wars arc and seems imminently shippable, but the only clone he interacts with is Cody, and fandom has decided that Obi-Wan has near-exclusive Cody dibs (the other obvious choice is Fandom Bicycle Obi-Wan Kenobi, and there are a fair number of quinlan/obi fics). Most other clones tend to get paired off with their Jedi, but Fox doesn’t have one of those, so he’s single and ready to mingle, so to speak. So it’s partially a case of Pair the Spares.

Also it has to do with personality. Quinlan is, in disney canon, a relaxed, easy-going, hypercompetent, humorous guy who’s also kind of an asshole. Fox has absolutely no canon personality, BUT he certainly has a fandom-assigned personality. Fox’s fandom-personality has changed over time, which was kind of interesting to watch. A while back, Fox was characterized as proud, brash, in-your-face, kind of a slut, cocky, etc. Now, he’s uptight, repressed, extremely stressed and sleep-deprived, cares deeply for literally everyone even though he hides it, slow to trust, doesn’t open up easily, kind of acts like a dick, is really abrasive, and really, really needs a hug.

I think the change was due to some Fox Discourse that went down where some people reacted to people basically hating on Fox for arresting Ahsoka and wanting his men to shoot to kill when they hunted her down, killing Fives, and serving Darth Vader. There was kind of a tidal wave of posts defending Fox, and at first it was like “Fox was following orders, it wasn’t his fault, and of course he would have his troopers shoot to kill Ahsoka, he thought she was a murderer and he knew she was armed and dangerous, and he killed Fives because he was doing his job and he saw Fives reaching for a gun, that’s not unreasonable even though it is tragic” and then it quickly progressed to “Fox was probably mind-controlled by Palpatine when he killed Fives” and “Fox flinched when Anakin yelled at him to he’s probably used to people hurting him” and all of that resulted in the New Fox Personality, as well as several things that we have zero evidence for in canon but Fandom accepts as Fact:

-all the other clones hate/strongly dislike the Coruscant Guard

-Fox constantly has to forge the chancellor’s signature

-Fox is terrified of Palpatine, and he Knows that he’s Evil

-Palpatine is mind-controlling Fox and Fox has memory gaps where Palpatine takes over

-Fox is ridiculously stressed and sleep-deprived and constantly on the verge of a breakdown

-Fox is constantly abused/yelled at my senators and he hates every single one of them

-Fox tries to keep secret exactly how stressed and fucked up he is

-Fox has between 0 and 1 (one) friends

don’t get me wrong I FUCKING LOVE these Fox tropes it’s just kinda funny how we’ve built this whole narrative framework by wholesale pulling it out of our collective asses (fun fact: Old Fandom Fox had a lip ring, New Fandom Fox has graying hair).

anyway, laid-back, relaxed, funny guy and upright asshole who secretly needs a hug is like, one of the top three ship dynamics in existence so when people saw Quinlan Vos paired with New Personality Fox, they were like “oh that is some GOOD SHIT” and anyway that’s my thoughts on how Vox became a thing thank you for coming to my ted talk

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thessalian · 2 years

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Thess vs ‘Reviews’

So I haven’t watched the Obi-Wan series yet. Though I am considering resubbing to Disney+ for it. It’s a thing.

What I did do, though, is see the review of the first two episodes in the Guardian, and now I kind of want to slap this guy. Probably with something soft-ish. Plush lobster, maybe.

Why have I taken against this person? Not because he disliked it - not exactly, anyway. But because he was talking about how “unnecessary” it was and how it was clear that Disney was scraping the bottom of the barrel and making snide remarks about how that person you saw for five seconds has a series upcoming with their full backstory Because Money.

To which I say FUUUUUUUUUCK THAT GUUUUUUUUY.

The question was, more or less literally, “Who cares what Obi-Wan got up to between Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope?” and my answer is “...Dude, did you see the reactions to his showing up in Rebels? Everyone who loves the GFFA cares what happened to Obi-Wan between Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope!” The whole point of the GFFA is that it is a galaxy, and it is very big, and in all that vast space there are characters we love and were very important but we lost a big chunk of them to time-skip and we want more. It’s like this guy doesn’t get emotional investment in characters at all.

And the thing is, with every movie and series and even game that’s come out, we just have more questions. Obviously some Jedi survived Order 66 - how? And what did they do after that? How did they stay hidden while still being able to, like, eat and stuff? We saw how some new characters did it - Kanan, Cal Kestis - but all we knew was that Obi-Wan was out there, someplace. Yes, we want to know what he did to survive. We want to know if he had any contact with either of the Skywalker twins, however indirectly, beyond Luke’s mention of ‘old Ben’. Was he hunted? If so, how did he deal with it? When did he find out that Anakin survived as Vader, and how? How did he process the destruction of everything he knows?

But this guy didn’t really care about any of that stuff. No, he was only there for Ewan McGregor elbowing people in the face, apparently. Because that, according to this reviewer, “justified the series’ existence”.

Bah. They really need to get people who actually give two shits about the Star Wars universe as a whole to do reviews like that. Not one that’d give anything that actually made the show crap an unearned good review, but at least one who didn’t think that a story about a character so central to the GFFA as we know it was somehow ‘unnecessary’. Patching the holes a time-skip leaves in our understanding of character growth? That is basically the jam of most Star Wars fans - and fans of almost everything else. Either they’re lore junkies or the kind of person that fills in plotholes with the tarmac of fanfic like most people breathe. Or both. Often both.

So yeah, might actually have to watch that just to spite this guy. Because I didn’t see the prequels but I still want to know what happened to Obi-Wan before he rescued Luke and R2 from tusken raiders.

#Thess has opinions

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qqueenofhades · 3 years

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so…now that we all know what you DISLIKE about star wars (and 400% fairly so, you have my full support here)…

what drew you into the universe, what keeps you around?

favorite characters, ships (OTPs or actual spaceships lol), overall themes, do you have a favorite random weird creature or robot that you adore? whatever you wanna talk about!

go off honey (again, but supportively 💖💖💖)

tax paid: the very nerdy star wars punk vest i made and the even nerdier matching vest i made for starsky

Lmaooo, entirely valid. You were like "star wars?" and I was like the drunk person at the bar who can't stop shouting about how much their ex sucks. But now that I have gotten all that off my chest, let's talk about why I love it (since if I didn't love it, I wouldn't have such strong opinions). Basically my feelings on the OG SW trilogy are similar to my feelings on the OG LOTR trilogy, as that tumblr post floating around somewhere put it: sure, they have flaws, but also, they're perfect. I have a complicated relationship with the prequels, as do we all, since George Lucas cannot write dialogue or direct actors to save his life (stick to what you're good at, George, hire other people to do the rest), but even they have their moments. Like. Hit me with that "Across the Stars" love theme, John Williams. Gahh. Just like that.

Because... Star Wars wasn't actually this omnipresent corporate global entertainment monolith when it started out. It was a dorky low-budget indie sci-fi film in the 1970s which everyone thought was going to bomb. But it told a simple and compelling story in an interesting way, everyone agrees that ESB is one of the best films/sequels ever made, and then ROTJ gave it a happy ending while it was still okay to do that. My main thematic gripe with the Disney trilogy (I will try to keep those to a minimum, lol, but I have to bring it up to compare) is that it very clearly fell into the "actual happy endings are naive and unrealistic and a cynical postmodern audience won't accept anything less than things being Bad" trap that, yet again, we have GOT to thank for. It obviously existed to some degree before that, but GOT blew it up to huge levels, where the only valid situation or character is that which is Grimdark and Depressing. Which, in my view, misses the heart and soul of what SW is all about??

Like. ESB is genuinely dark. ANH was this fun plucky little sci-fi film where the scrappy good guys won the day against the Nazi stand-ins, as they were supposed to, and then ESB comes along (speaking of John Williams, let us all chant together, DUH DUH DUH DUHDUHDUH DUHDUHDUH, DUH DUH DUH DUHHHH DUHHH DUHHH DUHHHH) and things go... wrong. Leia and Han are on the run for most of the movie, then get captured and tortured by the Empire and and betrayed (however unwillingly) by Lando. The Rebellion is attacked on Hoth (I tell you, those fuckin AT-AT walkers were SCARY when you see it as a young kid for the first time), and forced into hiding. Luke loses his hand, doubts Obi-Wan and Yoda and realizes that his mentors are fallible, makes dumb mistakes, and of course gets hit with The Most Famous Line In Movie History. But it's also just adrenaline and excitement. THE ASTEROID FIELD! THE HAN-LEIA BANTER! THE FIRST LUKE-VADER DUEL! THE FACT THAT YOU HEAR TWO FRICKING NOTES OF THE IMPERIAL MARCH AND YOU'RE JUST LIKE OH YEAH OH YEAH OH YEAHHHH!

But also then... Return of the Jedi. It gets shat upon for the Ewoks and reusing the Death Star as the Big Bad and being supposedly cheesy and not as Thematically Dark as ESB. Which is all kinda silly, in my opinion, but also, can we talk about Luke Skywalker's character arc and how he chooses possibly the most radical compassion ever demonstrated by a hero in an action movie, let alone a space opera. He insists that Anakin Skywalker is still in there somewhere and puts his own neck on the line to prove it. Luke doesn't save the galaxy by being a Badass Jedi. He saves it by throwing away his lightsaber and saying "I will not fight you, Father." He saves it by trusting that even in the depths of darkness, Anakin can come back from the charred ruins of Darth Vader and finally do what he was supposed to do all along. He can end Palpatine for good and all (we don't talk about "Somehow Palpatine has returned" because it's nonsense, obviously). Anakin can avenge the Jedi and what was done to him and all the lies he believed and the pain he wreaked on the galaxy, even then. It's not too late. It's not too late. Like. I don't care if this is Lightweight or Childish or whatever. It makes me CRY every time I watch it. Especially the moment where Luke takes off Anakin’s helmet and sees how ruined he actually is under there, and yet the downfall and death of the trilogy’s chief villain is not triumphant at all but instead utterly heartbreaking. “You were right about me Luke... tell your sister... you were right.”

Excuse me, I need to just /CRIES INTENSELY/

Luke won't be tempted to the dark side for his own sake, but Leia's ("If you will not join me, then perhaps she will"). I likewise hold firmly that Anakin/Vader is one of the best movie villains/antiheroes of all time and likewise have many feelings and Strong Opinions about his arc, prequel writing clumsiness and eye-rollingly tepid love story aside. (See: he and Obi-Wan were deeply in love and in a way they still are, don't @ me. I have no problems with Padme and obviously stan Natalie Portman at all times, but Anakin and Obi-Wan’s relationship is the real love story, the heart of the prequels, and in some ways even the subsequent movies, the end.) And “so this is how democracy dies, with thunderous applause” is... raw af as a line. For being in a Star Wars prequel movie. What?? (Also, the Revenge of the Sith novelization had no business being as good as it was. If only that dude had also written the movie.)

Anyway, my point is: the OG trilogy had plenty of moments of staggering emotional weight and where things genuinely sucked for the good guys and the outcome wasn’t entirely clear. The difference is that it didn’t choose to dwell on them, and it allowed for a transformative fictional space where a happy ending, fiercely fought for and squarely earned, was the right outcome. We didn’t need to go back thirty years later and make everything suck for fear that a cynical modern audience couldn’t connect with it otherwise. (Like I said, we didn’t need the new movies at all, but Disney heard that Cha-Ching of the Almighty Dollar). Star Wars was sci-fi, sure, but it also had the fantasy elements that allowed a happy ending to be the right choice for what we saw the characters go through and the philosophy that carried us through the original trilogy.

Likewise it’s just... Peak as far as dynamics go. C-3PO the fussy metal butler who worries about Everything and R2-D2 who is the droid embodiment of YOLO? Flawless. Sassy scruffy space pirate and badass politician warrior princess bicker constantly, butt heads, drive each other crazy, and then fall in love? Iconic. (And has shaped my ship tastes for... all of eternity, oops.) The above-discussed transformation of Luke Skywalker, whiny ordinary teenage kid, to the truly great man who fulfills what Obi-Wan, Yoda, AND the rest of the entire Jedi order couldn’t manage to do, because of their own flaws and blind spots and black-and-white moral views that didn’t know what to do with a man who loved as passionately as Anakin Skywalker, for better or for worse? The guy who managed to save the galaxy with love? STAN.

So... what? The Disney trilogy decides to retcon all that, throw everything that they’ve fought for out the window, make Han, Leia, and Luke miserable and rejecting the roles they grew into in the original trilogy, and die without ever really reuniting or seeing each other again as a trio? The underlying message was that “these happy endings aren’t satisfactory/realistic/sophisticated enough” and idk, maybe it’s just the shitshow of the last few years, but I’d like to see some entertainment that had the cojones to tell me that despite all the darkness and despair, maybe there’s a chance for hope. (”Rebellions are built on hope,” thank you Only Valid New Star Wars Movie Rogue One.) And Rogue One worked so well, despite being utterly GUTTING as all the heroes died one by one, because we knew what was coming next (A New Hope) and that their sacrifice was going to be worth it. I don’t care if that’s “realistic” or not. As I’ve said before, that’s what stories are for, and if I only wanted things that were Real Life, I would only read the news. Besides, the idea that happy endings never happen in reality is equally bullshit. We as a culture need to accept that more, instead of finding reasons to tear everything down.

So just... yes. The original trilogy might have flaws, but also, it’s perfect. And do I want to rewatch it all now? Kinda.

(Anyway. I warned you this was gonna be long. Oh look, it’s long, and I’m sure there is even more I could say, but still. Ahem.)

sleepover weekend asks

#buffaluff #ask #star wars #long post

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gffa · 4 years

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THE JEDI AS NATURAL, INSTINCTIVE TEACHERS IS A FUNDAMENTAL TO WHO THEY ARE AT THE CORE. For @jedijune‘s theme for Saturday, June 13th: Teaching/Learning

Taking a Closer Look at the Jedi Order in Star Wars Canon [Meta/Reference Guide]: Chapter 3: Teaching Is A Central Theme To The Jedi

Teaching is a central theme to the Jedi: Obi-Wan: “You’d make a good teacher.” Anakin: “No thanks.” Obi-Wan: “Anakin, teaching is a privilege. And it’s part of a Jedi’s responsibility to help train the next generation.” [Star Wars: The Clone Wars movie]

“Master Yoda said we never stop learning. Perhaps the Master is meant to be as much a student as the Padawan. I may not be the teacher that Qui-Gon was. But I am the one that Anakin has.” (–Obi-Wan Kenobi, Age of the Republic: Obi-Wan Kenobi #1)

Henry Gilroy and Dave Filoni on establishing Yoda as a teacher early on: Gilroy: "There were elements that we really wanted to explore, and that was things that were classic to Yoda, as a teacher. We thought this was a great opportunity to show how the Jedi interact with the clones. Specifically Yoda in a teaching role, of the clones, who were socially new, who were created to fight, and he really broadened their horizons, and helped them realize there was a great big universe out there that was bigger than just fighting and killing.“ Filoni: "You see Yoda teaching the clones, much like he taught Luke, ‘cause that was kind of natural for them, a natural instinct to take these clones like their students. And it really allowed Yoda to have a scene that was reminiscent of a scene we both liked growing up, when he was teaching Luke.” (Star Wars: The Clone Wars, “Ambush” commentary)

George Lucas on education (who believes it is the most fundamental issue): “Plato didn’t teach [in the sense of drilling answers into them] people anything. All he did was ask questions. The process was asking questions–'Why is the sky blue?’ It was purely a reverse of us feeding you all the information and [instead] teaching the kids how to learn.” I find this is often the answer for why Yoda or the other Jedi don’t just lecture on the answers re: Force theology, because the narrative believe/creator’s belief is that it’s more important to teach how to ask a question than to drill in an answer. A direct example is Yoda’s teachings to Ahsoka in “Teach You, I Will” getting her to think for herself and how George Lucas talks in an Empire Strikes Back documentary about Yoda’s bizarre speech patterns being about getting the audience to really stop and think about what the weird little frog man is saying.

JEDI PHILOSOPHY + TEACHINGS:

The Jedi did not see themselves as infallible or that failure was something any of them could avoid, even for their most esteemed Council members: Depa Billaba: "We cannot deny, Masters, that I failed you. Failed you on a massive scale.“ Obi-Wan Kenobi: "A lack of failure has never been a prerequisite to service, else none of us would be here. Welcome back to the Council, Master Billaba.” [Kanan: The Last Padawan]

The Jedi do not see themselves as a source of the light side of the Force, but rather the other way around. In Darth Vader: Dark Lord of the Sith, Jocasta faces off against Vader and says: “You are [Palpatine’s] tool. Little better than a droid, set to stamp out the light side of the Force. But this is impossible. The Force is eternal. It cannot be ended, it cannot be stopped, not so long as life exists.“ showing that, even if all the Jedi were dead, they knew that the light would still find its way in the galaxy, because the Force is eternal, the Force is in all life, the light is in all life, so long as that life exists.

“The Jedi can guide. We can teach. We can help people to help themselves. But we are not an army. If a people are truly determined to write themselves out of existence, there is little we can do.” [Obi-Wan & Anakin]

Questions are shown as natural and a good thing: “A child, Anakin remains. His path before coming to us, difficult. His questions, natural.” [–Yoda, Obi-Wan & Anakin] "I have no issues with Anakin. He is asking questions, as he should be at his age.“ [–Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan & Anakin]

It’s not just younglings that should be asking questions, but everyone: "Answers, did you find?” "I did. And as often is with the Force, more questions.“ "Mmmm. Good, questions are. Ask them we must. Certainty in our understanding, to arrogance it leads. To the dark side.” [–Yoda, Qui-Gon, Age of the Republic - Qui-Gon Jinn #1]

Questions and determining your own path tend to be a big theme with the Jedi, that everyone must determine what they want for themselves, what they understand the Force has laid out their path to be and whether they want that, like with the above, and when it’s woven into the very decision that Ezra has to make, that Kanan can’t just tell him what to do on this: “Which way is the right way? “The wrong question, that is.” “I’m sorry. I don’t understand. To be honest, I don’t even know what I’m doing here.” “A better question, that is.” “Kanan said I was gonna be tested, but he never said what for or why.” “And your Master tell you everything, must he?” “Well– No.” “Your path you must decide.” [–Ezra and Yoda, Star Wars Rebels, “Path of the Jedi”]

Obi-Wan taught Anakin that things should not be trampled just for acting according to their nature, instead (when they can) use the Force to move them along: "These beasts are nearly mindless, Anakin. I can feel it. They are merely following their nature, they should not die simply because they crossed our path. Use the Force to send them on their way.” [Obi-Wan & Anakin]

Henry Gilroy says a similar thing with: "Obi-Wan truly is a Jedi in that he’s like, ‘Okay, I’m not going to murder these creatures [in the Ryloth arc of The Clone Wars]. They’re starving to death. They’ve basically been unleashed against these people as a weapon, but it’s not their fault. They’re just doing what they do. They’re just animals who wanna eat.’ [Aggressive Negotiations Interview]

Ezra says he saw his parents and Kanan tells him what the Jedi teach: "I saw them, Kanan. My parents. I-- I can't explain how." "The Jedi teach that life doesn't cease at death, merely changes form in the Force. Your parents are alive inside you, Ezra. They will be. Always." [Star Wars Rebels, "Legacy"]

JEDI AND THEIR STUDENTS:

A great emphasis is placed on teachers and students working together: “Yoda cocked his head. ‘Adapt he must as well. Cooperation is learned not through individual effort. Only together can you progress.’” [Master and Apprentice] Yoda also says the bond between a Master and a Padawan is sacred. [Dooku: Jedi Lost]

Jedi are never really done being students/being tested, even when they become teachers and Masters themselves, that students teach Masters just as Masters teach students, and their tests reflect this: "But surely I should have been informed if you were testing my Padawan?“ "Who says the lesson was for him?” Bant said, smiling at her old friend. Obi-Wan’s jaw dropped. "You were testing me?“ "For both of you, the test was,” Yoda told him. Mace nodded. "A reminder that while Padawans must listen to their masters…“ "Teachers must also listen to their pupils,” Bant concluded. [Choose Your Destiny: Obi-Wan & Anakin]

“This is why we study. Why we learn. Skill is the child of patience.“ [Obi-Wan & Anakin]

"Your mission was never about [bringing back] the book. It was about everything you did to find it. All the challenges you had to face along the way. And you overcame them all.” "It was a test.“ "It was a journey, the next step in your training, and you succeeded in every way that mattered.” (–Luminara Unduli, Barriss Offee, Star Wars Adventures #20)

EARLY JEDI TEACHINGS/JEDI PHILOSOPHY 101:

As an overview of what Jedi teach as the early and foundational lessons, across multiple media, we see that meditation and self-reflection are just as important as bonding with their sacred crystal and practicing with their lightsaber, which then also connects with how so much of the early teachings Kanan gives Ezra when they're just starting are just as much/more focused on connection and understanding of self. (As detailed below this!) [Age of the Republic: Obi-Wan Kenobi + Kanan: The Last Padawan + Obi-Wan & Anakin]

One of the very first training sessions we see Kanan giving to Ezra–and thus informing our understanding of the foundations of Jedi teachings–is to have Ezra doing a handstand and tells him to, “Focus. Focus on letting go.” Eventually, trying to toss objects at him to get him into letting the Force move through him, hear its whispers instead of shouting at it. Before Kanan brings out his lightsaber to practice with, he wants Ezra to first mentally focus. [Star Wars Rebels, “Rise of the Old Masters”]

Another one of the earliest lessons Kanan teaches Ezra, putting it as one of the foundations of Jedi teachings is how they're connected to other beings: “Step outside of yourself. Make a connection with another being.” as he teaches Ezra to connect with a loth-cat. “I just don’t see the point of this.” “The point is that you’re not alone. You’re connected to every living thing in the universe.” [Star Wars Rebels, “Empire Day”]

When Kanan first starts training Ezra, he repeats Yoda’s saying of, “Do or do not. There is no try.” When Ezra questions it, Kanan says that he really doesn’t understand it, either. By the end of the episode, after Kanan realizes Luminara can’t train Ezra, that he has to commit to Ezra instead of half-assing this, he says: "I– Ezra. I’m not gonna try to teach you anymore. If all I do is try, that means I don’t truly believe I can succeed. So from now on, I will teach you.“ [Star Wars Rebels, “Rise of the Old Masters”]

Another early lesson is that Ezra must be honest with himself to advance as a Jedi: “Ezra, you’ll never advance as a Jedi if you can’t be honest with yourself, at least.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” “It means Tseebo matters to you. You do care what happens to him.” [Star Wars Rebels, “Gathering Forces”]

Which is then reaffirmed later in that same episode: “I got news for you, kid. Everyone’s afraid, but admitting it as you just did makes you braver than most, and it’s a step forward.” [–Kanan Jarrus, Star Wars Rebels, “Gathering Forces”]

Ezra has trouble moving forward in the first season because discipline and focus are fundamental to being a Jedi: “But you said I was a Jedi. Why else would you be training me?” “I never said you were a Jedi. I said you had the potential to become one. But you lack discipline, focus.” [Star Wars Rebels, “Path of the Jedi”]

JEDI CULTURE:

Jedi younglings (at least the diurnal ones) wake at dawn to meditate on the three pillars–the Force, Knowledge, and Self-Discipline. Then they go to the refectory for lunch, where Dooku always likes to sit next to Sifo-Dyas. [Dooku: Jedi Lost]

The Jedi have a strong aesthetic that echoes the deepest parts of the Force–all circles and lines. Time and the Force and the Jedi are all connected circles and arcing lines.

“You must not grow too attached, too fond, too in love with life as it is now. The emotions are valuable and should not be suppressed… but you must learn to rule them, Padawan, lest they rule you.“ (Kanan: The Last Padawan)

“This man is perverting our sacred teachings to prey upon a vulnerable people. I can think of little my tongue could say better than my saber in this instance.” “Dissolve your hostility, Padawan. Channel your frustrations into an appropriate emotion. Violence, as always, is a last resort.” “Of course. Apologies, Master.” “A fire burns inside of you, Padawn. That, in itself, is not inherently wrong. It is my job to help you temper it.” [Jedi of the Republic - Mace Windu]

JEDI AND FACING THE DARK SIDE:

“The fact that everything must change and that things come and go through [Anakin’s] life and that he can’t hold onto things, which is a basic Jedi philosophy that he isn’t willing to accept emotionally.” (George Lucas, Attack of the Clones commentary)

The Jedi test from the Rebels episode “Path of the Jedi” novelization on facing their fears/the dark side within them: "This test was not designed solely for the apprentice. It was also a test for the master, for facing one’s fears was a lifelong struggle.” (Ezra’s Duel with Danger)

The test is specifically designed by the Jedi–as is the same test on Ilum for the Jedi younglings that they all had to face–to face their fears, because it didn’t just happen one time, it was something they faced all their lives, younglings and Knights and Masters, all of them. This is why Ezra has to face it in Rebels, why Luke has to face it on Dagobah, why Rey has to face it on Ahch-To, the Jedi have always had to face the darkness within themselves and work beyond it.

Kanan also says it plainly as they enter the Temple: “In here, you’ll have to face your worst fears and overcome them.” It’s pretty obvious that’s what happening when the Temple shows him a vision of the Grand Inquisitor killing Kanan and Ezra has to pick himself back up, admit what he’s feeling so he can face the fears again, and understand that he has to let them go and then it cannot hurt him here, the Grand Inquisitor’s blade passes right through him. It’s then Yoda’s voice calls to him and we see that Ezra letting go of those fears allow him to move forward: “Big fears have you faced, young one.” “Yes.” “Hmm. For what lies ahead, ready are you?” “I am.” “Come. See more clearly what you could not see before.” [Star Wars Rebels, “Path of the Jedi”]

When Cal is struggling with facing his fears and needs to create a new lightsaber, Cere gives him a pep talk and they head off to Ilum, where she tells him: “You will be tested. I don’t mean just here [on Ilum]. Every Jedi faces the dark side. And it’s very easy to fail. We will always struggle. But that is the test. It’s the choice to keep fighting that makes us who we are." [–Cere Junda, Jedi: Fallen Order]

THE THEME OF GEORGE LUCAS’ MOVIES:

George Lucas says, “All of my movies are about one thing. Which is the fact that the only prison you’re in is the prison of your mind. And if you decide to open the door and get out, you can. There’s nothing stopping you.“ –George Lucas (American Voices, 2015)

Which is reflected in the teachings of the Jedi, which further shows they’re in line with the narrative intentions of Star Wars: Petro: “You-you said we would be trapped.” Yoda: “Not by the cave you were but by your mind. Lessons, you have learned. Find courage, you did. Hope, patience Trust, confidence, and selflessness.” (The Clone Wars, “The Gathering”)

#jedi order #jedi june #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #mace windu #ahsoka tano #luke skywalker #george lucas #meta #long post

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helbertinelli · 3 years

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I wanted to see the new Jedi Order AND the New Republic in the sequels. But no, instead we got A New Hope 2.0, Luke 2.0, and Darth Vader 2.0. This is so disappointing.

Yeah, the sequels were disappointing. There were so many better ways to continue the story of SW (although personally I think they shouldn’t have continued it), but they chose to go about it in the worst way possible. They had no idea why SW was loved and they focused on the absolute worst things and then switched to new things when the first thing didn’t work rather than to try to fix the thing that didn’t work.

Like they were for sure that people loved SW for Vader so they gave us a guy who wore a costume that looked similar to Vader’s, but the character himself had no personality, he had some lame motivation to join the dark side, and he wanted nothing more than to stay evil. People didn’t like Kylo and then they were like okay, well Palpatine was in all 6 films, they have to like him. And then they brought back Palaptine.

But they missed the fact that the people loved Star Wars for the story. That the characters in SW were just characters without the story to tie them all in.

Everyone loved Luke saving Vader and Vader wanting to be redeemed. The sequels tried that story with Rey and Kylo, but 1. There was no reason for Rey to want to save Kylo. He wasn’t her father, he had no relation to her other than the fact that he killed Han in front of her and he tortured her and her friends. 2. Kylo didn’t want redemption. Every time he was offered the chance to do something good he turned it down and it was like 2 or 3 times that this happened. Vader didn’t. Yes, he didn’t accept Luke’s help at first, but he did in the end. And after Palpatine died, Vader wasn’t like “Okay, I’m taking his place now. Join me or you’re nothing to me“ to Luke. Vader did want to rule the galaxy with Luke right after he found out he has a son, but he gave up on that and realized that he needs to come back to Luke rather than to have Luke joining him. He realized he needs to make the right decision because his son is important to him and he can’t lose his son. Rey wasn’t important for Kylo. She was literally no one to him. They had no relationship at all, except what Kylo said: “My grandfather worked for your grandfather so we’re a dyad” (I legit had to pause the movie because I couldn’t stop laughing... they even ripped off Space Balls omg). Maybe the sequels would have been better if the two were related (either siblings or cousins). But they were just strangers and Rey just decided one day that she wants to save Kylo for some reason and then she decided that she’ll go back to trying to kill him and they kinda switch back and forth between that and it’s just a complete mess and doesn’t even come close to the story of Luke redeeming Vader that they were trying to rip-off from the OT.

People loved Vader being mysterious and intimidating and they loved the idea of this powerful Sith lord wearing a mask (like the Sith of the Old Republic did). And the sequels tried to copy that aesthetic, but then they reveal Kylo’s face right away and he’s not intimidating at all and the whole mystery around his identity behind the mask goes away too. And his entire thing is to be whiny and throw a tantrum when things don’t go his way and destroy everything around him. I guess they were trying to copy Vader choking people with that, but the scary thing about Vader was that he would choke people but he’d put no energy into it and he’d stay calm and it was kinda unnerving how calm he was when he was choking the life out of someone. This is why Vader was intimidating and menacing. He didn’t lash out like a spoiled child and destroy his toys. He was in control even when he wasn’t and he was calm and made it seem like taking someone’s life was no issue to him.

Anakin’s backstory is loved by people. The way someone who was a Jedi and good became a Sith and took down the entire Jedi order and basically destroyed everything his world was about in the process was extremely complex and well-written and Anakin is somewhat of a sympathetic character because a lot of people can see that he made the wrong choices for all the right reasons (he just wanted to save his wife and their unborn child... children as we later find out). Kylo’s turn to the dark side is just he was contacted by Snoke, who whispered bad things to him about Luke, and for some reason Luke decided that the only way to deal with this is to for some reason kill Kylo in his sleep??? (yeah I also don’t understand why the guy who spent 3 movies trying to redeem Vader and refused to fight Vader and was about to let himself get killed by the Emperor because he was convinced his Sith lord father was actually good and would save him, is now like “You know, my nephew has to die. He can’t be redeemed.”). And then Kylo’s immediate reaction to this was to kill everyone else in Luke’s temple because I guess they also needed to rip-off Order 66 (out of all things that happened). Kylo isn’t sympathetic in this way because 1. He had a loving family and a good support system with Han and Leia and even Luke to some extent. He wasn’t like Anakin who never had anyone to talk to and who had to keep his life a secret from the Jedi and who grew up a slave and who was desperate to save the only family he had left. Kylo’s life was good and they said it was good in the sequels too. 2. He got threatened by Luke and his very next choice is to go kill a bunch of innocent people. He never showed any ounce of remorse for his actions. At least with Anakin, we see that he’s torn apart when he’s pledging himself to Palpatine and he’s basically hurt and haunted by his actions starting from then on. Kylo just killed a bunch of people and he’s going around like “yep, just another Tuesday...“

And aside from just doing a bad rip-off of a story that was already presented in the same universe, they also messed up with other characters that were beloved.

Luke, who never gave up on his father and who even abandoned his training (I think) to go save his family, is now the guy who wanted to kill his nephew at the first sign of the dark side and then his solution was to leave his family behind and never see them again.

Han is a deadbeat dad who left his wife when things got hard and went away on a road trip with Chewie to avoid any responsibility.

Leia is always sad and she desperately wants to forgive Kylo (they basically gave her Padme’s personality for some reason, when she’s more like Anakin). Like I can see Han forgiving Kylo (because he does have a big heart despite his rugged exterior), but giving what we know about Leia’s character, she wouldn’t forgive Kylo. It took Leia a long time to come to terms with forgiving Anakin and she wouldn’t even talk to his Force Ghost when he came to apologize, even though she knew he’d never see him again. There’s no way that she sees Kylo basically turning into Vader 2.0 and she’s like “there’s still good in him.“ Like he destroyed an entire system of planets, that had to bring back some painful memories for Leia. She actually had to watch Alderaan be destroyed. And he killed Han. I know their relationship was ruined in TFA, but TFA also made it clear that Leia and Han were still in love. There’s no way she would have forgiven Kylo or thought he was still good after he killed his dad and her husband. And he tried to kill her too if I remember correctly. He fired on her ship, which made her float out into space. Leia isn’t like Luke or Padme. It would be difficult for her to forgive Kylo for basically turning into her worst nightmare and taking her family away from her and killing so many other people too.

And then they bring back Palpatine too because I’m guessing their thought process was “well he was in all 6 movies that people loved, we do need a good villain.“ And it made no sense. Palpatine died like twice in ROTJ. He got destroyed by the reactor that Vader threw him in and then the entire Death Star exploded into tiny particles. There was no way for the Death Star to be crash landed on Exegol since it basically blew up in all directions in the middle of nowhere in space. Bringing him back basically invalidated all of Anakin’s story because him dying to bring balance to the Force was for nothing. He didn’t balance anything, Palpatine was never defeated. They really didn’t need Palpatine to be the villain of TROS. You could replace him with any other random villain and nothing changes. They only brought him back to make a reference to the old movies and have people watch their movie for nostalgia. But I honestly don’t know who was nostalgic for Sheev.

Anyway, it’s embarrassing that they had a good story that they tried to rip-off and they still managed to fuck it up. Like how hard it is to rip-off Star Wars and still have a good story? Didn’t Disney actually accomplish it before in a Phineas and Ferb special? I don’t know why they couldn’t do it this time around too.

But for real, they should have showed the New Jedi Order and the New Republic and show us how Luke and Leia were changing the world for the better and how they were fighting to keep the world a better place rather than to give us a watered down version of the First Galatic Empire vs Rebels but with worse characters and a worse story this time around.

#thanks for the ask #anti sequel trilogy #Anonymous #ask

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glimmerglanger · 4 years

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Whumptober2020 - Day 5

We’re right around the halfway point for the oof!au as of today! Life continues to be awful for Obi-Wan and the 212th. All general warnings still apply. Specific to today’s entry: strangulation (with the Force), torture, mistreatment of prisoners, brief mention of non-con, branding. Still jumping around with the prompts.

Oof!au basic information: Post-Order 66 Vader-Captures-Obi-Wan AU. Eventual happy(ish) ending. Past/eventual Codywan. One-sided Vaderwan.

No 24. YOU’RE NOT MAKING ANY SENSE Forced Mutism | Blindfolded | Sensory Deprivation

Obi-Wan stared across at the wall in his cell for a long time, after the med-droids pulled him from the bacta. He had not thought while submerged in the tank. It had been a relief. All his memories were waiting for him as he came back to consciousness, every burning moment of them.

There was no way to pretend, even for a moment, that it had not happened. The brands across his back pulled each time he tried to move, remaining even after the bacta treatment. He could not see the marks well, not even with his arms free, as they were most of the time in his cell. He shuddered to think what Anakin had burned into his skin, what marks he would bear, for however long he remained alive.

He had known, when he antagonized Anakin, that the results were unlikely to be.... Pleasant. But he’d had no choice. Allowing Anakin to consider too long Padmé’s fate, the fate of his children…. It risked too much. The safety of the children first and foremost.

There was comfort in imagining Luke and Leia safe. Far away from the violence of their father. Obi-Wan would keep himself between them and the rage burning within Anakin, until it consumed him outright. He could keep Anakin distracted, keep his thoughts away from the children, from everyone who needed protection. Obi-Wan knew he could continue making Anakin angry. It had never been a difficult task, and it was significantly easier at the moment.

He closed his eyes and then opened them again, because there was nothing he wanted to see in the dark of his own mind. He’d been aware of Anakin’s….occasionally lustful thoughts for years, since even before Anakin had been Knighted. Anakin had watched him. Wanted him. But he’d never imagined Anakin would--

Well. There were so many things he’d never imagined Anakin would do. Forcing his way into Obi-Wan’s body was hardly the foulest of his actions of late. Compared to genocide, it barely counted, he thought, laughing alone in his empty, barren cell. The alternative was weeping, and he wouldn’t do that.

He knew well enough he was being monitored, ever and always.

It was strange, he considered, absently. He’d felt like a sleep-walker for years, living on Tatooine. He’d gone through the motions of living, a part of him stuck and held back on Mustafar, in that awful instant when he had turned and walked away from Anakin, all of his failures curdling in him.

Obi-Wan felt awake and like himself again, sitting in a cell, subjected to one hurt after another. He knew how to handle torture, knew only one way to deal with it, and it felt natural to fall back into sharp, ill-advised words, to goad his captor, controlling them without them ever realizing what he was doing, to feel almost… confident that he would escape.

He always had before, after all.

He needed to balance himself, if there was to be an escape. Needed to prepare for whatever Anakin intended to do to him next. Luke and Leia were depending upon him, after all. There was no way to reach out and touch the Force, no way to draw comfort from his connection to the universe. There’d not been much comfort there, of late, anyway.

He leaned his head against the wall, stared at nothing, and tried to focus on breathing exercises. He told himself, eventually, that he started to feel better.

Anakin left him alone, for days. Long enough that Obi-Wan suspected he’d been called away on some other mission, dancing to the whims of his Master. There was no way to adequately track the days in that featureless cell.

Troopers brought him food, sometimes. Well, they brought him nutrition, anyway, some kind of mush that was grey-ish brown in color, contained in a tube. One of them would hold his hair and jaw while the other forced it into his mouth, giving him no choice but to swallow or choke.

They always dragged his arms back and bound them, first, forcing him face-down against the cold floor, before pulling him upright once more, like he was little more than a sack of cargo.

“Delicious, as always,” he rasped, after they finished one day, specks of whatever the food was caught across his chin. It tasted vaguely of dirt and always set heavily in his stomach. They did not reply, they didn’t even look at him, his men who had been--

Been turned off, inside. Not even their expressions changed, as far as he ever saw. They were blank-eyed marionettes. Like droids, except droids had personality, even with a control bolt.

Obi-Wan swallowed, his throat tight and pinched closed, wondering if all of the troopers had suffered the same fate; if they’d all been killed, for all that their bodies continued walking around. He’d grieved for his people, for the Jedi, after the genocide…

He hadn’t realized that he had the eradication of two entire peoples to mourn. “Alzo. Booster,” he said, because someone had to remember their names for them, had to remember who they had been, now that they’d had their identities taken away. He supposed he might be the last person in the galaxy who both could and would. “I’m so sorry. For what they did to you.”

Alzo didn’t turn or hesitate as he walked through the door. Obi-Wan thought Booster did, thought he froze, for just an instant, but… Well. He knew he was looking for shreds of hope, regardless of whether or not they actually existed.

The troopers cared for his other physical needs on a sporadic basis. Sometimes they dragged in a hose and sprayed him down, the water icy cold and stinging across his skin. The pressure was so high that he had to turn his shoulders against it, but at least it cleaned him off.

Sometimes, they held him in place and shaved his face, uncareful with the razor. They did not trim his hair; it grew down over the tops of his ears, lower, shaggy. He doubted he’d recognize himself, without a beard and with such tangled hair, but that mattered little. There were no mirrors, in his little cage.

There was nothing at all to offer a distraction, just his healing wounds and the weight of wondering what Anakin had planned for him, next.

Obi-Wan felt almost certain weeks had passed by the time the troopers dragged him from his cell again. He’d gotten familiar with the walk through the halls of Anakin’s mountain fastness, to his throne room. He made absent conversation as they walked, the utter silence of his companions a weight in his chest.

They seemed to have grown used to his chatter. Or, at least, they no longer struck him for it. Perhaps Anakin had reprogrammed them.

Considering that option distracted him, if nothing else, from what he could guess was coming. Anakin waited already in the room for him, sitting on his throne, one leg crossed over the other, expression hidden behind his dark mask.

He was speaking to Cody, as Obi-Wan was dragged in, Cody standing there at attention before him, straight-backed and blank-faced and-- It was all wrong, all of it, even just catching the end of a conversation where Cody reported what had happened in Anakin’s absence. Obi-Wan wondered, fleetingly, if Anakin really left Cody in charge, if it were only another barb, meant to cut into Obi-Wan.

The...harness they’d chained Obi-Wan to last time remained where it was. It pulled at his attention, heavy as gravity. Obi-Wan fought to control his expression as Anakin stood and said, “Restrain him.”

“You don’t have to do this,” Obi-Wan said, speaking as Cody walked over to him, though he expected no answer. He fully anticipated that he would be ignored utterly, and so he was not disappointed as his arms and legs were dragged into position.

“Aren’t you going to tell me I don’t have to do this, either?” Anakin said, the mechanical sound of his voice still jarring and wrong. He’d stood and crossed the room, apparently, staying behind Obi-Wan’s back.

“Would it do me any good?” Obi-Wan asked, as the wall-covering raised across the room, revealing the fires of Mustafar, so far below. The lava fell in the distance, leaving Obi-Wan feeling cold.

“No,” Anakin said, leather-covered fingers trailing across the top of Obi-Wan’s shoulder. “I’m no longer swayed by your lies.”

“I’m not the one lying,” Obi-Wan said, and Anakin snarled behind him, stepping away. Obi-Wan felt the heat when the furnace opened. He wondered how much of his skin Anakin intended to burn this time. He kept talking, because he knew no other way to be, “Successfully murder anyone for your new master?”

The pain was sudden and swift, directly over his spine, the metal so hot it felt almost cold as ice, at first, tendrils of agony spreading everywhere. “I protected the Empire,” Anakin snapped, leaning his weight against the brand, “I made people safer! Secure!”

The brand came off his skin, though it really changed nothing about the level of his pain. He listened to the metal clatter across stone, considering, bitterly, that once he would have hoped desperately for Anakin to find him, in this situation. Once, he would have held out hope that Anakin - above all others - would rescue him.

He said, around the bitterness in his throat, “Ah. The way you made our people safer?”

“The Jedi weren’t my people,” Anakin snarled back and - and the next burn was higher, still on his spine, a blaze of agony. “They were nothing but a corrupt cult. Religious fanatics who went power mad during the war. They were traitors--”

“Traitors to what?” Obi-Wan cut in, the lies pouring from Anakin’s mouth too much for him to take. He panted, twisting his wrists against the bonds, body shaking as Anakin pressed a fresh brand to his skin and it hurt, Force--

“To the Republic,” Anakin spat, and Obi-Wan laughed, shakily.

“Oh,” he gasped, his thoughts getting sharper with pain, “the Republic you destroyed? That Republic, or do you mean--”

“Shut up!” Anakin snarled, and made his point by curling tendrils of the Force around Obi-Wan’s throat, squeezing. Obi-Wan sipped at the air, unable to breathe deeply, feeling his pulse pounding against his skin, giving a strangled cry as Anakin burned him again, Force, he’d almost reached Obi-Wan’s neck--

“The Jedi betrayed the galaxy. They were dangerous. Self-centered. Even before the war, they - they only cared about themselves. But I saw through them, with the help of my new Master. And - and we stopped them. We gave the Jedi exactly what they deserved, Obi-Wan. Just like you’re getting what you deserve.”

He released his choking grip, finally, and Obi-Wan slumped, gulping at the air, smelling the burned char of his own flesh, shivering all over and unable to stop it. He’d gone into shock, he knew. There was no way to avoid it without the Force to draw on, the tell-tale signs of it a betrayal by his own body.

He thought how fortunate it was that he seemed to have set Anakin off on a speech, one that did not require further input from anyone else. “It was right, what I did,” Anakin was shouting, pacing, by the sound of his voice, no longer right at Obi-Wan’s back, “Necessary. And - and my success proves that the Jedi deserved it. The Force smiled upon me. Blessed my purpose. It was the will of the Force. Their - their death proves that.”

Something shifted in Obi-Wan, beyond the pain, beyond the numb horror of the past years. Something that had always been within him, a fierce little ball of whatever made up his soul, stirring his tongue, knowing it would drag Anakin’s attention back, knowing it would mean more pain…

“By your logic,” he panted, inhaling the smell of char and ruin, unable to stay silent while Anakin deluded himself even further, “I suppose that means what happened to your mother was the will of the Force.”

There was a moment of utter silence. Utter stillness. Obi-Wan’s mouth twitched up in one corner as he stared out into the falling lava, bracing with a jagged grin.

Anakin snarled, something low and deadly in his tone, “What did you just say?”

Obi-Wan wetted his bottom lip, unblinking, deliberate in each word he spoke. “I said: you must believe, then, that the successful murder of your mother proved that she deserved--”

Anakin made an awful sound, bestial, and something gripped around Obi-Wan’s throat, his mouth, the Force digging into bone and muscle. “Take it back!” Anakin roared, even as the shackles around Obi-Wan’s wrists tore open, pried apart with the Force.

Obi-Wan slumped, opening his mouth to refuse, but no sounds issued from his throat, Anakin’s grip only tightening, crushing things--

“I said: take it back!” Anakin snarled, grabbing his shoulder, jerking him around and the first blow caught Obi-Wan by surprise, spinning him and dropping him to the ground. Anakin followed, fingers in his hair, tilting his face up into another blow.

“How dare you!” Anakin spat, following one blow with another and Obi-Wan lost track, the impact of metal against flesh felt almost like it was happening to someone else, someone far away from him, Anakin’s continued demands that he apologize, that he recant everything, take back his lies, were barely even noticed.

He could not speak anyway. Anakin was… crushing things. In his throat. Tearing them to pieces. He could not make a sound, not as Anakin bodily lifted him, throwing him against the stockade, pressing him into the sharp edges of the metal, and all the pain blended together into one huge, twisting nightmare.

Eventually, the dark reached up and took him away, even while Anakin was still thrusting into him.

Obi-Wan fell into the black and appreciated the relief.

Obi-Wan woke up in his cell, most of the hurts gone. For a moment, after waking, he considered that perhaps he’d only dreamed his last run-in with Anakin. But his throat hurt, still, strange and deep. He cleared it and tried to rasp out a “hello” to no one. He made no sound at all, and shuddered.

He did not bother trying to leverage himself up off of the floor. He lacked the energy for it.

He wondered, smelling bacta drying in his hair, why Anakin had simply not killed him.

He was still wondering when Tich and Sweeper brought his breakfast. Obi-Wan nodded at them, old habit, since he could not offer a proper greeting. They alternated his care, the men on the base. Obi-Wan believed there to be around three-dozen of them, but… Some had disappeared, since he’d been delivered.

He shuddered to think what had happened to them.

Tich and Sweeper shackled him and hauled him up, pushing his shoulders against the wall. He leaned against Tich’s hand, when Tich gripped his jaw, helpless to stop himself looking for some scrap of comfort, and Tich’s index finger tapped, blaster-fire fast, against his cheek.

He wanted to say: I tried to ask for help, but trying to speak at all was a fresh agony. He winced, used to the fingers in his hair by now, and said nothing. They wouldn’t have done anything, anyway, even if he’d been able to plead for assistance.

And so Obi-Wan just stared forward, waiting for whatever they were going to do to him next.

Days passed. Vader had him dragged in and dragged out, but seemed to grow irritated and distracted when he realized that Obi-Wan could not speak. It took… significant effort before Vader believed that Obi-Wan was not just refusing to make a sound. Once he did, Vader ordered the troopers to take him back to the medical bay, for repairs.

Obi-Wan laughed soundlessly as he was dragged along. He’d always assumed Anakin would be pleased to never have to listen to him again. There was something amusing, darkly, about Anakin’s drive to return his voice.

Perhaps it was only because he hadn’t yet heard Obi-Wan screaming.

Nor would he, even if Obi-Wan’s voice were returned. Those thoughts chased each other around Obi-Wan’s head as they got closer and closer to the medbay. He hung between Cody and Booster, too damaged to walk under his own power, his legs giving finally halfway down the hall.

And it was a surprise, strange and jarring, when Cody hesitated and then shifted, movements oddly fluid for how stiff he normally moved, and just… lifted him. Cody had carried him off of battlefields before, too many times.

He’d joked, towards the end of the war, that it was getting to be a habit.

Perhaps it had. Perhaps it was muscle memory, the way Cody just pulled him up. It certainly was habit that had Obi-Wan dropping his head onto Cody’s shoulder, taking comfort in the familiarity of the contact, his eyes burning, all at once.

He wept not in front of Anakin. Wouldn’t. But the tears streaked down his face, unheeded, as Cody carried him into the medbay, finger tapping erratically against Obi-Wan’s skin. And Obi-Wan wanted to tell him it was alright, that Obi-Wan would find a way to get them all free, but he had no voice, no way to speak the words into being.

#whumptober #no.24 #forced mutism #clone wars #fic #non-con #non-explicit #branding #strangulation #torture #my writing #oof!au #codywan #vaderwan #troopers trying very hard to wake up

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padme-amitabha · 3 years

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Not an attack, just a question; Reylo is awful without a doubt, but do you acknowledge Anidala has big problems too? Not that it's nearly on the same as Reylo, but surely you know Anidala isn't flawless, right?

Okay here’s the thing: no relationship is without flaws and neither is Anidala but it’s nothing “big” or problematic. It’s the circumstances that made it end terribly. The relationship suffered because both characters are flawed individuals, especially Anakin. Anakin had a lot of unresolved issues and wasn’t mentally stable. He was completely off edge on Mustafar - he would have killed/attacked anyone not just Padmé.

Anakin and Padmé’s love is genuine and it’s about two people from two different worlds who find themselves trapped in their roles . I have said multiple times TCW doesn’t get Anidala right or Disney canon in general but the original relationship was never abusive. If you are talking about TCW Anakin’s jealousy and possessiveness, yeah I agree it’s not healthy and I don’t ship TCW Anidala either. Anakin couldn’t bear to lose Padme - it’s not really about romantic jealousy or about other men stealing her away.

Whatever issues movie Anakin had, it could have been fixed by therapy and by acknowledging it. That was the problem in the relationship - they were naïve and they idealized each other. Padme overlooked Anakin’s flaws to the point she was heartbroken in ROTS. Anakin in his rage could never rationalize that Padme would never betray him. As I mentioned earlier (and it is confirmed by other books), if Obi Wan hadn’t showed up on Mustafar, Anakin would have never attacked Padme. Despite all that, Vader still regrets hurting her. Which is because he never intended to hurt her in the first place. I obviously don’t support this and I can tell you no one likes him choking her - but Anakin’s crimes weren’t just against her. It was basically him (and Palpatine) against everyone he knew. He even did those because he had no choice and the fact that he sacrificed his morality for her and yet she betrayed him was what made him so upset. Padme could have easily blamed Obi-Wan for sneaking into her ship without her consent but Padme is a loyal person just like Anakin which is why she was the one who suffered the most. Her compassion was her undoing.

Anakin went to the dark side out of fear of losing his wife. The Jedi viewed this kind of relationship as possession but for Anakin it was over-attachment. Which is completely natural. The only other person who he loved as much was his mother and she died horribly. He thought he couldn’t cope with loss. The only problem is Padme had no idea how far Anakin could go for that. I don’t think it’s Padmé’s fault in any of this. She didn’t encourage Anakin in any of his crimes and the only thing she did was to try bring him back to the light side (like Luke). Notice he had softened after hearing her on Mustafar before Obi-Wan ruined it. Besides, Padme had loved ones who were alive and healthy. It would have been very difficult for her to understand the extent of Anakin’s desperation.

Anakin was attached to his mother in the same way too - I don’t really view it as a bad thing. He wasn’t making them stay against their will - he just couldn’t afford to see them die. We are all attached to people in some way - it’s just not natural for Jedi to be overly attached to people. Anakin just didn’t know how to deal with this fear of loss and did everything because he truly believed Palpatine could save Padme. Another argument is if Vader would have forced Padme to stay with him against her will had she survived but that would have never happened either because Padme was always on his side. I don’t really view Padme as completely “good” - she prioritized Anakin on multiple occasions and it really wouldn’t have been very different from if Luke had joined Vader.

As I mentioned here, Anakin and Padmé trusted one another and didn’t keep secrets from each other till the very end due to circumstances. And despite their differences, all they were loving and compassionate people who wanted to be together and have a family. There’s nothing non-consensual, toxic or abusive in their relationship. It’s not without its flaws but the prequels are a tragedy so there has to be some flaws (and it was mainly because of circumstances than anything else) for something to fall apart.

#ask #anidala #anakin x padme #vaderdala

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anghraine · 3 years

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@laufire tagged me in a fic meme!

The Game: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favourite opening line. Then tag some authors!

1. Even in Gondor, Éowyn was cold.

Tolkien, WIP: an AU take on the Éowyn/Faramir hair mingling scene with f!Faramir/Fíriel. I’ll probably fold it into daughters of the great at some point, but haven’t yet.

2. Elrond did not call the Council.

Tolkien, WIP: a (new) AU where Faramir is the one sent to Rivendell. I’m not writing it in a long fic sense, but I do have some snippets.

3. Gwen did not often dwell on life before the Searing.

Guild Wars, WIP: a canon-compliant one-shot focused on Gwen Thackeray’s last day before the Searing, ft. the GW: Prophecies PC (here, Irene Fairchild).

4. At least, Lady Georgiana thought, Darcy had the mettle to write to her of his engagement himself.

Austen, WIP: a canon-compliant fic dealing with the responses of Darcy’s canon and headcanon relatives to his engagement/marriage. This first bit is posted here.

5. The Steward was fortunate in his children.

Tolkien, WIP: an AU take on Denethor and Faramir’s relationship, with f!Faramir. Another piece of the Fírielverse.

6. Faramir was born under the Shadow, son of a weary father and wearier mother.

Tolkien, WIP: a canon-compliant take on Faramir’s childhood and his first dream of Númenor.

7. My dear Edith,

I hope you and your brother are well.

Guild Wars, complete: a canon-compliant epistolary take on the GW: Prophecies’s PC’s last day before the Searing. Here.

8. Eldarion had no queen.

Tolkien, complete: a canon-compliant fic where Eldarion has an arranged but happy marriage to Faramir and Éowyn’s younger daughter + lifespan angst. Here.

9. “Is there no deed to do?”

Tolkien, WIP: the opening to we also are daughters of the great, a Fírielverse fic with Éowyn and Fíriel first getting to know each other. I wrote and posted the first part a longggg time ago; the newest section begins with:

Fíriel was easy to talk to, Merry found.

10. “But Lizzy, you can tell us whether it is like or not.”

Austen, WIP: the opening to tolerably well acquainted, a fic that was originally tracking the development of Elizabeth’s feelings for Darcy at Pemberley, and then kept going. The current chapter’s draft begins:

By the time that Elizabeth reached the signature, she could nearly have crumpled the letter in her hand.

11. I always thought of myself as Ascalonian first, and Krytan second.

Guild Wars, WIP: a slight AU of GW2 from the POV of the human noble origin PC w/ missing sister storyline, where making the PC/her sister proud Ascalonians has a significant impact on them and their choices. I’ve been poking at the fic, pro patria, for years, but the current section begins:

I’d opened my mouth to ask something else, but Frazarblade suddenly interrupted me, slightly raising her voice.

12. If Darth Vader did not avoid the sight of his daughter in carbonite, he certainly did not seek it out.

Star Wars, WIP: the third part in an AU-of-the-OT f!Luke series. This part, The Jedi and the Sith Lord, follows Lucy and Vader after she’s captured by the latter in Cloud City (for AU reasons I won’t get into here). Like the last few, I started this a long time ago, so the beginning of the new section is:

Anakin didn’t hesitate.

13. In the first few years after his escape from Yakone, Noatak drifted: from place to place, from name to name.

Avatar, WIP: from One More Tomorrow, an Amon-centric f!Tarrlok fic (...I do understand that this is a) very predictable for me to write and b) of very limited interest to other people). It’s actually part of a longer series, though not nearly as lengthy or the f!Luke one or as involved as the f!Faramir one. The new section begins:

Amon had already stopped walking.

14. Boromir and Fíriel could both command man and beast alike.

Tolkien, complete: a short Fírielverse fic about Fíriel grieving Boromir/meeting Pippin. Here.

15. In her heart, perhaps, Fíriel knew what must happen.

Tolkien, WIP: a Fírielverse fic about Fíriel after the destruction of the Ring and Denethor’s death in battle, deciding what to do about Aragorn’s claim in the midst of grief for her father and uncertainty about her future. Here.

16. When Leia told them the truth, Jyn and Cassian said nothing.

Star Wars, complete: a Leia/Jyn/Cassian fic set after Leia finds out that Vader is her natural father. Here.

17. They escaped the way they arrived.

Star Wars, complete: AU Jyn/Cassian fic where the main cast of Rogue One makes it out of Scarif alive, and it turns out everyone has assumed Jyn and Cassian were in a relationship. Bonus grey-ace!Cassian and autistic!Jyn. Here.

18. Jyn never forgot the moment when her mother’s body slumped to the ground.

Star Wars, WIP: AU Jyn/Cassian fic where Jyn, Cassian, and Bodhi make it off Scarif together, only to get sucked into the Death Star and forced to pass themselves off as Imperials without getting caught. Another one that I started a pretty long while ago; the most recent part of it begins:

As Jyn made her way back to the hold, she caught the murmur of voices.

19. Augustus Jones was a gentleman.

Austen, WIP: an AU where Wickham gets murdered after the Netherfield Ball and the cast of P&P are suspects. Darcy/Elizabeth, of course.

20. Jyn imagined herself with Princess Leia, sometimes.

Star Wars, WIP: a Leia/Jyn/Cassian Everyone Lives AU where Jyn struggles with being into Leia and Cassian at the same time.

I think that’s about the right fics, anyway! Basically: now and then I jump straight into the story, but most often, I begin with a statement that’s kind of ??? in terms of where the story is going, but then ‘zooms in’ to provide some context/background/revelation of what’s going on before we head into the story proper. I think of it as orienting the reader, basically, and I’m usually a bit ????? unless I can think of a way to do it. I didn’t include my original stuff on this list, but I generally do the same thing there.

My fave of these is probably:

In the first few years after his escape from Yakone, Noatak drifted: from place to place, from name to name.

It does the thing where it starts from this kind of distant perspective in order to narrow in later, but I think it does a much better job than usual of giving an idea of the story’s focus, and I like the phrasing.

tagging, if you want to do it ... umm, I’m not sure who has this quantity of fic, but: @ncfan-1, @ladytharen, @kazaera, @brynnmclean, @irresistible-revolution, @steinbecks

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hahaha1d0that · 3 years

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I agree with many people that Anakin’s story was kind of poorly developed, especially in the movies. However, I think what we have seen shows how his motivations were strong enough to join the dark side and become Darth Vader.

Anakin had no father, literally, and only had his mother until he was ~10y/o.

He and his mother were slaves for Watto.

When Qui-gon discovered how high his midichlorian count was, his force sensitivity was made into a big deal.

Qui-gon believed very early on that Anakin was the Chosen One and that he would fulfill the prophecy of balancing the force.

Anakin had to say goodbye to his mother and leave the only home he ever knew to live with and be trained by strangers.

When Anakin was first brought before the High Jedi Council, they refused to allow him to be trained. His confidence was built up and broken down within such a short amount of time.

As one of the only men that believed in him and cared for him up until that point, Qui-gon’s death must have been heartbreaking to Anakin.

The only reason Yoda agreed to let Anakin into the Order was because Obi-wan basically threatened to leave the Order and take Anakin with him and train him without the council’s supervision (and because he trusted Qui-gon’s judgement).

Anakin was raised by Obi-wan for the next 10 years, but probably in a very by-the-book way because Obi-wan was dedicated the the Jedi Code.

During this time, he was probably judged by everyone else in the Order. Everyone expected him to be the Chosen One. What do you think happened when Anakin failed at something? Made a mistake? He was probably held to such high expectations the rest of his childhood.

When he was 19, he saw force visions of his mother dying. He went back to Tatooine to find her just in time for her to die in his arms. He killed the entire village of Tusken Raiders out of rage, probably because he never had a place to vent his anger before. Jedi are taught not to let emotions control their actions, but for the first ~10 years of his life, he was raised differently. He probably had strong emotions but had to hide them to avoid further disappointment from his peers.

It is implied that Anakin was knighted because the Jedi Order didn’t have enough Jedi knights to serve as generals in the Clone War. They admitted that he hadn’t passed all of the trials but knighted him anyways. One of the most important achievements in any Jedi’s life was falsified in Anakin’s case for the council’s gain.

When the council entrusts him to train Ahsoka, and after he warms up to the idea of that responsibility, he grows very attached to Ahsoka. So when Cad Bane almost threw her out an airlock, she was almost killed by the Blue Shadow Virus, she was possessed (and killed¿) by the Brother, she was kidnapped by Trandoshans, she was framed for murder, she was expelled from the Order, and when she left the Order and Anakin behind...Anakin felt responsible, heartbroken, and maybe even betrayed. He missed her and resented the council for her deciding to leave.

Not to mention when the council decided to have Obi-wan fake his death and go undercover to prevent Eval from kidnapping Palpatine. Anakin genuinely thought his master, the man who raised him, “the closest thing [he had] to a father,” was dead. They had a funeral that Obi-wan’s closest friends and peers attended under the impression that it was real. After the mission’s success, Anakin finds out that the council lied to him in such a horrible and kind of unnecessary way.

Anakin also saw force visions of Padmé dying. Not only was padmé his wife and the love of his life, but she was also the mother of his unborn children. He wasn’t just trying to save her, he was also trying to save the twins from dying. He had three lives at risk that he was desperate to save.

When Anakin is inducted into the Jedi Council, he isn’t given the rank of master. This is the first time in the Jedi Order’s history that a member of the council was not ranked as a master. If Anakin wasn’t ready to be a master, he shouldn’t have been accepted onto the council. Later, Windu tells Anakin that if his intel is correct then he will have “gained [his] trust” meaning that Windu never truly trusted him before that.

So when Palpatine promises to help Anakin save Padmé, supports Anakin’s decisions throughout the war, and seems to want to help him, Anakin grows close to him. Anakin depended on him.

In the end, he was deceived. Padmé was dead (he probably assumed his children were dead by extension), the Jedi were dead, he believed his former padawan was dead (probably at the hands of Rex, who he also probably thought was dead), his master had left him to die, his life was basically ruined, and all he had was a man that engineered his suit to constantly cause him pain to ensure that he would never overthrow him.

Anakin’s story is a tragedy, and it’s shown beautifully if you pay enough attention.

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ariainstars · 4 years

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Ben Solo - A Sad Star Wars Story

Warning: longer post. (And possibly, a few unpopular opinions.)

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For a start: I’m not here to say I like how the sequels ended with Episode IX, in particular the way they handled their protagonist.

It sucked, to say the least.

I am writing this because looking back now, I can hardly imagine how the authors could have wrapped up the sequel trilogy with the happy ending we expected.

Let’s start with that word: happy. Honestly, did anyone want Ben to be “happy” with what Rey has become? I did expect her to fall down the rabbit hole. We repeatedly have witnessed how aggressive and judgmental she is; and by all logic, she had to meet her own Dark Side in order to realize that she has no right to judge the man she first knew as Kylo Ren. The moment I heard Palpatine’s evil laugh in the first trailer, I figured he had come to pursue Rey, not him. Unfortunately, her moment of shock was short and she hardly learned from it; if anything, since Luke sent her right back into the battle. This scene may have been what fanbros expected from Luke, but honestly, it was ridiculous. It did not fit to The Last Jedi’s Luke and it did not do Rey any favor.

And: had Ben emerged victoriously, found his happy ending, how would the title “The Rise of Skywalker” be justified? He is a Skywalker by blood, but in fact he is a Solo.

Wrapping Up the Saga

The sequels were received with mixed feelings from the start. Fans of old were angry at The Force Awakens since it seemed to say that history was repeating itself; that the heroes or the original trilogy had brought down the Empire but not managed to preserve peace. We saw them separated from one another as they once had been, disillusioned and worn out. Not the mention the wasp’s nest that was raised by The Last Jedi! If the Prequel Trilogy dismantled the illusion that the Jedi were perfect, the Sequel Trilogy definitively does the same with the Skywalker family. Both messages are clear for everyone to see, provided one is ready and willing to see them.

If Star Wars is a tale with a moral - and given its approach and the fact that it was handed over by Lucas to Disney of all studios it is - then the authors are trying since the 80ies to teach our minds to a compassionate approach on both villains and heroes. One of the main reasons why many fans dislike the prequels is that they expected to see the Jedi and Anakin / Vader being cool; they felt let down by witnessing the Jedi’s narrow-mindedness and Anakin’s strong emotionality. The affronted reactions to The Last Jedi were on the same line of thought. The prequels showed that the Jedi were not the good guys, and for the observant viewer this is already clear enough in the original trilogy. But it was only with The Last Jedi that the elephant in the room was finally approached.

Through Rey, The Rise of Skywalker makes clear that wanting to be a Jedi does not entail actual heroism but the conviction of being a hero. And Rey’s dyad in the Force, the tragic figure of Ben Solo, warns about the dangers coming from a child and teenager no one believed in as a person because everybody only saw his powerful potential.

The Jedi’s Failure

Neither Luke nor Anakin nor Rey needed the Jedi in order to become heroes. They already were good-hearted, brave and idealistic when we first met them. The Jedi ways did not make any of them happy; they learned to use their powers and employed them for short-lived “victories”, but they never found lasting peace.

Not a few fans have wondered how Luke Skywalker, who believed in his father despite all, could give up on his nephew that fatal night (even if it was only a moment of panic). Simply put: as strong and mature as he is by the time of Return of the Jedi, Luke suffers from a father trauma, and he desperately wishes for Vader to become Anakin again, his father, who used to be a hero. When he asks Vader to leave and come with him, it is not out of pure idealism but also a personal request. But Luke did not need his nephew. The moment he had at the temple was a personal issue, it had little to do with Ben’s strength in the Force or his status as Luke’s model student: Luke was afraid that Ben would be the end of everything he loved. Luke, Leia and Han were thrown together by a trauma bonding; Ben had no place with them because he hadn’t been through the same.

The actual tragedy in Ben Solo’s life was the bitter realization, over and over, that he was not needed by anyone (except for being abused, e.g. by Snoke). Ben desired Rey even before he had met her because she was powerful but unexperienced, and he hoped to find sense and belonging by protecting and instructing her. No wonder Rey’s rejection in the Throne Room drove him out of his mind with rage: it was another confirmation of what he had experienced all his life - that people can do without him. So he decided, bitterly and sullenly, that he could do without others as well. But over and over, he had to realize that he could not escape his want for connection. He kept hunting for Rey; and he was very conflicted both when it came to his father and his uncle, letting on that he did have an emotional connection with both of them although he didn’t want to accept it.

Ben’s tragedy was that he did not want to be special at all, and that contrarily to his uncle and grandfather he was aware of it. Ben simply wanted to belong somewhere.

It is an intrinsic part of the saga that a hero is never a hero “because he is superior to others for… reasons”: Star Wars does not bow to that cliché. Some people are born with the capacity to tap into the Force, but not all of the saga’s heroes have it. The morally good qualities a person has, the right decisions they make are not inborn but passed on, learned, communicated. In A New Hope Luke was saved by Han, to whom he had offered companionship and set an example by trying to save Leia. In Return of the Jedi Vader was won over by his son’s loyalty and sacrifice. For an average action film hero, this kind of attitude or outcome of his adventures would be unacceptable: a hero is expected to be triumphant, not saved by someone else. And I know enough fans who don’t understand Luke and prefer Han or Vader to him, who are both cooler and more predictable.

In film, where characters need to be introduced to the audience within the scope of minutes, narratives are applied in a way that the general audience gets them quickly. The downside is that this goes at the expense of nuances. Fans don’t like to see Anakin being passionate and stormy because as Darth Vader he was coded as brutal but cool; they don’t get Obi-Wan’s many mistakes because he was coded as a hero, or Yoda’s arrogance due to his status as a wise old mentor. The sequels brought this dichotomy to a new level coding Rey as the heroine although she has a bad attitude and comes from bad blood, and Ben Solo as the villain when his attitude is conflicted at worst, and who is the offspring of the original story’s heroes. The difference lies in their intentions - hers are good, his are bad. This is interesting because it makes us, the audience, question ourselves as to how and why we believe we can tell good from evil.

You could probably say into a megaphone that the Jedi are not the good guys who always win, that the Force is not a superpower belonging only to the Jedi and that there is no simple Dark and Light but that the Force needs balance: some viewers will never get it. I guess everybody feels the saga’s subtext on a subconscious level; but woe betide if someone like Rian Johnson brings it up to the surface for everyone to see.

Narrative Key

One of the main reasons why The Last Jedi is so divisive is, I think, that its major theme connecting all of the others is communication. While the prequels told much about miscommunication or lack thereof, Episode VIII is packed full of beautiful examples of what happens when people actually manage to communicate; and even when they do not, they learn from their misunderstanding one another (e.g. Poe with Admiral Holdo).

It is a common but major mistake not to question the narrative key to a story. Many Star Wars fans believe the story is simply about the good guys defeating the bad guys, so they overlook the deeper themes of the saga and respond with outrage when the authors try to humanize their heroes, bringing them down from their alleged pedestal. It is e.g. helpful to know Joseph Campbell’s monomyth theory; to consider that a film saga is not the same as a TV show and that therefore if the characters go through changes these must be significant from one instalment to the next due to the time limitations; to watch a few films by Akira Kurosawa, in particular The Hidden Fortress, to understand the significance of a major event seen through different eyes; or consider the prequels’ parallels with legends, classic literature, or the Bible - Lucifer’s fall, Romeo and Juliet, the tales of King Arthur. Star Wars is a conglomeration of many narratives, from Western films to the Japanese to French fairy tales to Greek mythology to Shakespearean drama. Who approaches these films expecting mere “action” is bound to be disappointed. It is understandable, however, that if you are used to certain kinds of stories, you will assume that every story should basically follow the same lines, and you will have difficulties accepting anything that is different, or believe it’s just badly made.

I still remember the (sometimes vicious) quarrels I followed in an online forum a few years ago about a Japanese mecha anime who some fans by hook or crook wanted to fit into the structure of a French novel. Of course, those two narratives don’t fit together: no wonder most of the other fans didn’t accept that kind of interpretation.

The Phantom of the Opera’s film version of 2004 was largely a failure both with regard to quality and audience appreciation because it made a tacky Byronic romance of a story that actually is a mystery thriller, probably expecting that it would be more appealing that way. What the filmmakers accomplished was making the story flat and the characters annoying by stripping them of the drama behind the original story.

Filming Rebecca’s film version from 1940 Hitchcock managed the transition excellently maintaining the storyline of the original novel; but Daphne duMaurier’s book is a coming-of-age story, and who expects a crime thriller may feel irritated by the narrators’ meandering and detailed inner monologue.

Game of Thrones also could not culminate in “all’s well that ends well”. The last season was not well-made, but I think now that was not the whole reason behind the audience’s disappointment. The show always was very crude and included loads of horrific events; even the worst victims of the war, who seemed to have a justification for their actions and seemed well-meaning, at times did terrible things. It would be a misfit to apply a happy ending to a “sex and violence” narrative as with another martial epic, like Aeneid and Iliad. Who waits for happy endings ought to avoid this kind of story from the start. (Yes, I know, I should listen to my own advice - had I imagined how depressing Rogue One is, Star Wars fan or not, I would probably have skipped it.)

Stories of this kind can be dissatisfying because as an audience, we follow our heroes’ adventures, sometimes for years, and we usually want to see them to find their happiness in the end. But in all honesty: we should have imagined.

That is why I think it was naïve to believe that the sequel trilogy would lead Ben to a happy ending with Rey. I have read more than one fanfiction which irritated me at first, until I realized that they were told on the lines of Fifty Shades of Grey, or Pride and Prejudice. That may work well for a fanfiction, but Star Wars is not a mere romance. Even if there was a hint of the overture to Romeo and Juliet during the abduction: couples based on that trope are not destined to end well. I myself was hoping for a happy ending due to the fact that the saga’s rights were in the hands of Disney of all production companies; and giving that the Skywalker family is one of the most famous in pop culture, I was certain they wouldn’t wipe them out. However I was not quite sure how they would do that and make it convincing, and I was wary when it came to the assumption (which many Reylo’s took for granted) that the love between Rey and Ben would be strong enough to save the galaxy and give them a happy ever after.

When a guy is introduced by murdering a defenseless old man, letting an entire village be wiped out with practiced ease, going on with torturing another guy both physically and mentally and climaxing with the horrible crime of patricide, one can hardly expect a happy ever after for him; even less since so very little was explained in terms of his childhood and adolescence. Some viewers identified with Ben Solo and saw his abandonment and abuse issues; many others didn’t, and none of the sequel films really thematized them. That he made peace with his parents and died to save the girl he loved is sufficient for a convincing redemption arc, not to offer him a happy closure.

The Trope That Comes Closest

There were a lot of speculations with regard to the trope Ben (Kylo) and Rey were actually modelled on. Romeo and Juliet, Hades and Persephone, Pride and Prejudice or Beauty and the Beast, and there were probably more. Rian Johnson is known for loving The Phantom of the Opera more than any other musical. I don’t think that’s coincidental.

- The phantom is disfigured by birth, Ben is extremely powerful by birth; and Ben also gets disfigured by Rey during their duel. (Vader’s sunken, charred face under the mask was, for a long time, how I imagined the phantom unmasked by the way.) - The phantom is highly intelligent and has huge musical talent. Ben was born with a strong power in the Force. - Both wear masks and look much less threatening without them. They also wear a cloak, and black clothes. - The phantom had committed terrible crimes both to protect himself and to punish a world which would not accept him. Sounds familiar? - In the musical we do not get to know how he became a ruthless monster in the first place. Ditto. - The phantom dies (or disappears, in the musical) because only the girl knew that he was lonely and unhappy and that he still had goodness inside him. She had forgiven him, but the rest of the world wouldn’t have believed her or forgiven him.

Both Kylo Ren and the Phantom are creatures who are at the same time terrible and wonderful. The normal world, populated by average people, cannot accept them because they are both too fascinating and too terrifying. In order to find lasting fulfilment, Ben ought to have found back to humanness. The phantom couldn’t due to his disfigurement and his criminal past; and though Ben loses the scar on his face, the Cain’s mark of the patricide he committed, his deed and his former status as Supreme Leader of the First Order never would have been forgotten.

“Yet in his eyes all the sadness of the world Those pleading eyes that both threaten and adore…” Christine in The Phantom of the Opera (on the rooftop)

Heroes: Dynamic and Static Characters

A general rule of storytelling is differentiating between dynamic and static (also called “impact”) characters. A static character is like an anchor for others: while they live through crises, learning and maturing, this character always remains his old self and always stands for the same values. He may be misunderstood, opposed and belittled, he may lose the battle, but never the war; and after having helped others through their troubles, he usually is on his own. (Cue: cowboy riding into the sunset.)

Superman stands for peace and justice, Jack Sparrow for freedom, Peter Pan for the innocence of childhood, Paddington for faith in people’s goodness. No wonder they are so popular: it is familiar and reassuring to follow the adventures of someone who is always like a rock in a storm. Static characters are in essence childlike, two-dimensional; which is probably why our child self easily gets attached to them and may be outraged at the idea of them changing, or maybe (gasp) being wrong about something.

But George Lucas developed his saga along the lines of personal growth, and by exploring its themes: thankfully, otherwise it would have become as boring and repetitive as so many other franchises. To continue a story you can either make it dynamic, or press the repeat button over and over. The Skywalker men with their strong emotionality may be unusual heroes, but much more interesting than other, “cooler” guys whose actions are more or less foreseeable. So, I can understand the Disney studio’s choices. On the other hand, it is not surprising when fans of old get angry when their supposedly unalterably perfect heroes make mistakes: everybody wants to know that some things (or persons) never change. Even if on the long run, change might be for the better.

I think one of the sequels’ most important messages was that the Skywalker-Organa-Solo family failed their heir precisely because their mindset did not change. Ben grew up in another world than they did; obsolete political structures, dictatorship or rebellions did not matter to him. But his family wanted him to adhere to the ideals that had gotten them through the war against the Empire, discouraging him from searching and finding his own place in the world, a world that now was very different both from the old Republic and the Empire.

Whether a static or dynamic character is more relatable to the audience is a personal matter. Many fans adore Darth Vader, Leia and Han Solo etc. precisely for the fact that basically they always remain their old selves. Padmé also is a favorite, probably due to the fact that she does not change considerably. Anakin changes a lot, which is perceived as a sign of weakness. Some fans may relate more to Luke, who undergoes serious trials and emerges from them stronger and wiser, far away from the greenhorn he was in A New Hope. And yet Luke’s final decision to throw his weapon away before Palpatine is often perceived as weird to this day. It’s not “heroic”.

The outraged fans who ranted at Luke’s portrayal in The Last Jedi did not realize that Luke was doing something both Obi-Wan and Yoda, or the other Jedi for that matter, never had done: he took responsibility for his actions. In this context Ben was the audience’s self-insert, he was as appalled at Luke’s misstep as we were. Such a blow is enough to send someone on a lonely island to meditate about his mistakes for years, convinced that the world is better without him.

But for the action film audience, that is not acceptable. If you have a light sabre and the Force (an alleged superpower), what do you need responsibility for? You can’t do wrong if you’re the hero, right? Luke also was the only character from the original trilogy who underwent character growth, which makes it all the more ironic that the many, many critics who tear the sequels to pieces are fuming at how Luke could be so “defiled”. Luke grew beyond the person he had been in A New Hope; these fans obviously did not. Which is why the studios thought they had to produce The Rise of Skywalker in order to “appease” them and to give them the Luke Skywalker they wanted.

Where Does the Galaxy Go From Here?

A conversation between my husband and me, about a year before The Rise of Skywalker came out.

Me: “I hope Ben Solo will survive at the end of the trilogy.” Him: “I do hope that, too. But they won’t give him a happy ending.” Me: “Why?” Him: “He killed his own father.”

I hate to admit it, but he was right. I’m not aware what ethics code is under use in the film industry now, but in any case, the horrible crime of patricide was done; even if it was under coercion, the son traumatized by it, and it ultimately brought him back to redemption. You can’t make a patricide, the former right hand and for a time leader of a terrorist organization a hero and give him a happy ending; in particular when you are Disney of all film studios. (Not to mention that he killed Han Solo, a very popular character.) And from exchanges with other viewers I am aware that many do not understand how Ben killed Han under Snoke’s coercion, and the implications that led him to kill Snoke: they believe he simply did it because it’s something an evil, power-hungry person will do.

Ben dying without anyone knowing that he was not a villain at heart and worse, leaving the fates of the galaxy in the hands of a young woman whom we often saw giving in to evil influences again and again within the scope of minutes was a dangerous turn. If he was but “a child in a mask”, Rey is a child who believes to be a Jedi. How is Rey supposed to be a heroine, with the other half of her soul gone? She and Ben fitted together perfectly because she had the good intentions but a violent attitude, while his intentions were bad but his attitude desperately conflicted because inherently good. Rey came from evil blood but was kind-hearted because she believed in her parent’s love. Ben was the heir of a family of heroes but did not feel loved by them, which made him lonely and bitter. What good is Rey on her own, even more so when at the end of Episode IX she deliberately leaves her friends and goes to a literal desert? The little girl inside of her is still starving for connection, and neither being a Jedi nor a “Skywalker” will appease her. She had to meet Luke to realize that he was a good man but still just a man; a lesson she didn’t quite internalize yet. The sequel trilogy wasn’t her story because her personality hardly developed. It was Ben who went through hell and back.

Films (and film sagas) have a determined length and as a film studio you need time to explore all themes, which in Star Wars are quite complex. The worst mistake I found with Episode IX was that it broke the Campbellian monomyth in favor of a Marvel type B-movie to appease the fans of old who had hated The Last Jedi. Which is understandable from their point of view, but went at the expense of quality. The Rise of Skywalker may have quenched the fire a little, but as a film, it’s frankly forgettable, and compared to the other films from the saga, I doubt that it will age well. Had the sequel trilogy continued Rian Johnson’s approach instead of putting a band-aid on The Last Jedi, it would have been good enough to make a cultural impact the way the classics did. If the sequel trilogy was meant to follow The Hero’s Journey, no one completed it: Ben died and Rey went into exile, and no one brought any kind of elixir or salvation into the world.

All of this is not to say that I have grown to like The Rise of Skywalker and that I am not disappointed about the ending, or no longer sad about Ben Solo’s death. I hope that the next trilogy will give him a second chance: I am still convinced that his ultimate fate should have been to bring lasting Balance to the Force. If I am wrong and his existence practically cancelled the past without improving anything, the whole saga loses its sense. I think that by now he atoned more than enough for his sins.

When I learned that Rian Johnson had negotiated his own trilogy after The Last Jedi, I remember wondering what it would be about. After all, almost everything had been said about the Skywalker saga, hadn’t it?

It hadn’t. I had naively assumed that like with Episodes III and VI, the final revelations were preserved for Episode IX. By now it seems to me like The Rise of Skywalker is meant as an appetizer for the next sequel. It can’t be that the studios unlearned how to make good films in so short a time after The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi, also considering that everything else they made about Star Wars in between (Rogue One, Solo, The Mandalorian) is solid work and not by a long shot as flat as Episode IX.

The studios assuredly will keep their secrets as long as they can. The Mandalorian was met with huge expectations, yet nobody knew about Baby Yoda before the first episode was aired. Due to their depth and love for details, Star Wars films can be watched and discussed over and over, and the message regarding the necessity of Balance is still widely unknown or not accepted by the fans. If this is supposed to be not only an entertaining but also an educational tale, authors must give new fans room to get to know the saga, and old fans time to let the new ideas sink in. Lucas and his collaborators have taken decades trying to teach us that morals are not black and white. But still when The Last Jedi came out, the message was utterly hated.

Whatever Johnson’s trilogy will be about, it can’t be a part of the Skywalker saga any more: they are all dead. Even if Ben is brought back somehow, he is a Solo, so this time it would be the story of his own family. The Skywalker saga was basically Anakin’s, and by reconciling with a Palpatine and giving his life to save the woman he loved his grandson ultimately made up for his sins. The Last Jedi was a bold move; but what are “bold moves” supposed to be good for if they are not followed through? Apart from the fact that the sequels weren’t even exactly bold but drawing sums from what we already could see in original trilogy and prequels about the Jedi and the old Republic.

Family Is the Key

Star Wars is a family tale. It is for families and it is about families. One of the most frustrating things about The Rise of Skywalker was, for me, that the “new” heroes didn’t make any kind of home or family of their own; and a Star Wars film or series never works without a father figure at its heart. I am sure Ben Solo was ultimately meant to be a father figure; the sequels couldn’t work without even giving him the chance to be one. Anakin and Luke both founded a family - one through marriage, the other befriending many different people. The third generation did not even get a chance either way.

“I believe that you are redeemed by your children.” George Lucas

In Star Wars, children always have to pay for their parent’s sins, and only they can make them atone. Which makes it all the more tragic that Ben is not a father; by this logic, only his child could have saved him, or an adopted one. On seeing the enslaved children of Canto Bight, of whom one is Force-sensitive, I was convinced that the sequels would be the children’s trilogy. (I might have accepted Ben dying had he saved and left them with Rey, who also is an abandoned child and so would have found a meaningful task.)

What the galaxy needs most are not heroes but people. Heroes exist to save desperate situations; lasting peace can only be made by normal people. With Luke becoming a hero in the original trilogy and Anakin a villain in the prequels, I was expecting Ben to find back to humanness. Since we have another trilogy to look forward to, I do still hope Ben will get another chance and this time he will find his happiness; but I also believe that he will have a long way to go before that. By the end of The Rise of Skywalker he is a hero, but in order to be happy he would need to learn how to be fully human, realigning both sides of his personality and healing the gap between them (the way Anakin couldn’t). And you don’t learn how to embrace your humanness quickly after having lost it within the scope of years and years. Ben wanted Rey because she was the only person in the galaxy with whom he could be completely honest. But being human also entails bonding with other people, not only with one’s significant other.

Ben tried to pull off the “bad guy” role and failed because it’s not in his nature. A lot of fans see him as a loser, because whether good or evil, a male protagonist is supposed to be always unfazed. The gentle, nurturing and emphatic personality that comes out in Ben when he is balanced is not that of a warmonger but of a peacekeeper: I see nothing inacceptable or emasculating in that. Unfortunately, who has Luke, Anakin or Han as blueprints for “real” men, won’t accept someone like Ben Solo. I hope that in time, he will be more appreciated, and that his life story will be a warning both for the audience and for the saga itself, i.e. that it is more to the point not to punish a criminal but to prevent him from becoming that way in the first place. Which brings us again to the topic of children and a better way to raise them, Force-sensitive or not.

Rey and Ben both are children with unhealed wounds. Their brief moment of harmony during the Force connection on Ahch-To was so powerful because both were speaking to each other’s inner child: Ben saying to Rey that she was not alone, Rey offering Ben an understanding he had not known before. Padmé also always saw in Anakin the good little boy she had first met; one of the reasons of the unbalance in their relationship was that he felt powerless to do something for her in return.

I think that the sequel trilogy of the Skywalkers wanted to tell us is that even if you save the whole galaxy, it’s not sufficient if afterwards you can’t support and protect your own offspring. When we met Han, Leia and Luke again, their personalities were pretty much as we left them; their mistake in handling Ben can’t have been something they actually did to him, the blunder must lie somewhere in their attitude. All three of them were traumatized by cruelly losing or never having known a healthy family life, so we must assume that after the war against the Empire, they tried to build a new world that would fit to their needs. But if adults build a home, they must do so thinking first and foremost not of themselves but of the ones who need it more than them. Children shape the future, not a victory of “good” over “evil”. And I find it interesting that the codebreaker DJ, who had such a pragmatic view of war, was also someone we met on Canto Bight, like the children. He was a traitor, but as everyone in the saga, even he had a point when he said that ultimately, wars are useless because they always flare up again.

“Good, bad, made-up words. You blow them up today, they blow you up tomorrow.” DJ in The Last Jedi

The last scene of The Last Jedi showed us a Force-sensitive boy sweeping an open space before looking up at the sky and dreaming about being a Jedi. I still believe that this scene’s meaning was “Clear the stage, it’s time for us - the children.”

The Jedi, respectively Force-sensitive creatures, must find new and better ways if they want to be advocates for peace and justice. No institution can claim to have a moral standard if it does not protect, nurture and encourage their most vulnerable and needful members, i.e. the children. Watching the prequels it is shocking to follow how the intelligent, brave and affectionate child Anakin could become the most hated man in the galaxy, crushed in the powerplay between the “good but narrow-minded guys” and the “bad but not always wrong” guys. Both his and his grandson’s dark fate could have been avoided, had it not been for the Jedi mentality based upon the conviction of having the right to destroy everything that does not (or does not seem) to line up with them.

The Star Wars saga told us over and over that power is not what it takes. The Jedi lost the Clone Wars; Vader was a lonely, bitter guy (not to mention Palpatine); Kylo had all the power his grandfather never had and it did him no good. Anakin, Han and Ben all were loved most by their women when they were at their weakest. And this brings me back to what I stated above: stories can be interpreted in different ways, but what about the message the author actually wanted to convey? If I am not getting it all wrong, it’s that compassion and not power is the key to everything good.

Episode VII and IX mirror one another, only VIII hints at a possible balance. Star Wars has a cyclical narrative; Anakin / Vader had his happiest moments and successes in his youth, while his grandson in his own youth hit rock bottom and committed his worst sins. If Kylo Ren’s destiny, as per Adam Driver’s words, is supposed to be the opposite of Darth Vader’s, how can The Rise of Skywalker really be the ultimate ending for him?

P.S. What do you think, could baby Yoda and Ben meet? Then Obi-Wan and Yoda would be together again in a new way. P.P.S I would also like to see the Force, for once. I’m sure it’s not black and white at all. How about a rainbow? (Does anyone have Rian Johnson’s e-mail…? 😊) P. P.P.S. On the other hand, if the next film starts with Rey being pregnant and not knowing how, I might be sick… ☹

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violetnotez · 4 years

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Disneyland and Lightsabers- Kaminari x Reader

Because there is never enough Kami fanfic and Im missing Disneyland ;(

Also, Kaminari and Izuku are definitely Star Wars nerds. Fight me not really pls i have noodle arms

Kaminari x reader

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 1250+

Warnings: some cussing

Summary: Kaminari and you visit Disneyland with Class UA and your boyfriend becomes a mega nerd in the middle of TomorrowLand

One Shot

Everyone had been so excited for the trip to Disneyland-especially you and Kaminari. You being the mildly obsessed Disney freak that could sing every song without fail and Kaminari never have gone, you both were psyched to experience the magic of Disney. You spent weeks planning, researching, and discussing what rides to ride on, what group pics to take, and what yummy foods to gorge yourself with.

Now you were here, and you couldn’t be more ecstatic.

All morning you were having the best time of your life. Your group, which consisted of Shouto, Midoriya, Uraraka, Sero, and Mina, were having the best time running into rides and taking dumb pictures around the park. But as the midday rush came and the sun was beating down on your group, you all felt like you were living in a sauna.

“No gonna lie,” Mina huffed out under the sheen of sweat trickling down her face, “I don’t think I can do this-how are wearing black Todoroki?”

Todoroki shrugged, not a drop of sweat evident on his face even with an adorablely clingy Izuku latched on to him as your group walked down the packed lanes of Tomorrowland.

“I’m cold blooded.”

“Wish we were back in Space Mountain,” Uraraka added tiredly, her bangs starting to stick to her forehead, “it was so cold.”

You looked at the tired faces of your friends and sighed. You were trying so hard to be the optimistic, happy one of the group that kept everyone on their feet and moving. But you had to admit that you were extremely hot too. You looked around as you dodged strollers full of children, hoping a nice quiet spot to rest in the shade was open-to no avail. It seemed like every family had taken a spot that was out of the hot California sun.

You sighed.

“Why don’t we just go into a store? There’ll be some air conditioning in there.”

“Can we please?” Mina begged, Sero nodding frantically as his bangs, too, began to stick to his skin.

You laughed exhaustedly from their childish desperation.

“Hey look,” Kaminari pointed, “that store sells lightsabers!”

Kaminari and Izuku looked at each other, a common love arising on their faces. Izuku finally clung off of Shouto and Kaminari let go of your hand, leaving you and Shouto to watch the two nerds run in like 5 year olds.

Shouto looked at you and shook his head.

“Nerds.”

The store was a noticeable few degrees lower than outside, even with the hoards of families walking inside. The whole group sighed in relief, allowing the rush of cold air to sweep over your bodies.

After that relief, you began to look for your fanboy of a boyfriend.You walked past bundles of children and Star Wars merchandise, puzzled on how you couldn’t find either boy.

You turned to Uraraka (who was obviously in awe by the store), confusion plastered on your face.

“Where do you think they-“

“OH MY GOD DUDE THEY HAVE COUNT DOOKU’S LIGHTSABER?!?”

You heard Kamianri yell a few octaves too high as he pointed frantically at a wall of lightsabers.

You smirked.

“Never mind.”

You walked over, a sly grin plastered on your face as you snuck up on Kami as he was gushing over the toys with Izuku, tapping your finger against his shoulder lightly.

“Having fun over here?” You asked, a smile playing on your lips.

Kaminari slightly jumped, surprised his quirk didnt go off and shock you from the scare. He felt his heartbeat go up, chuckling at your obviously smug face.

“Yeah,” Kaianri sighed, breathless with excitement, “it’s just-these are so cool! I’ve always wanted one of these since I was a kid.”

“Really, Kami? I thought you had a bunch of those things,” you said, remembering the bucket of old toy lightsabers you found at the back of Kaminari’s closet.

“Yeah I know,” he agreed,” I just-always wanted a real one-one I could build myself, ya know? Be a real Jedi and do what they did.”

“Oh,” you nodded as you agreed, giggling at his adorableness.“Should I sign you up for the Jedi Training here too?”

Kami’s face light up, grabbing your shoulders and shaking them slightly.

“Oh my god could you please?!”

You laughed, brushing your finger on the bridge of Kaminari’s nose, something you loved to do because it made him a blushing mess.

To no surprise, his checks turn a soft shade of red.

“Believe me Kami, I would if I could.”

You both look at the lightsaber station and the group of crazy kids becoming their own Jedi as they meticulously built their weapons.You turned back to Kami, the softness in your eyes making his heart thump. He loved when you looked at him straight on-he could look and appreciate every facial feature that made you you- the color of your eyes, the shape of your nose, the outline of your lips: everything about you he found cute, beautiful, and attractive, and he loved to absorb it all in.

“What color do you think you’ll pick?” You asked.

Kami blinked his eyes a couple time, his daze being broken. “Huh?”

You giggled, making his checks warm. He always felt sheepish when he realized he had been staring at you.

“I said, what color are going to get?”

You bopped his nose again, making his checks go redder, making his bright yellow eyes stand out.He fumbled with his hair, giving you a cheecky grin.

“The blue one, obviously!”

“That’s so basic Denki!” You laughed.

“It’s the best color though!” He argued happily.

“Obi-Wan used it-well, until Darth Vader killed him-oh and Qui Gon-until Darth Maul killed him too…Anakin- he turned into Darth Vader and got a red one-and Luke…except when Vader cut his hand off he got a green one…”

You looked at him, you eyebrows raised in concern and amusement, a comment on your lips that you were holding back to spill.

“What?” Denki asked, Noticing the look you were giving him

You smiled wide. “Nothing….”

“What?” he chuckled, trying to get your thoughts out of you.

He grabbed your hand as you turned away to hide your smile, making you look at him as a laugh escaped out of you.

“No, I’m not gonna tell you!” You shouted, crinkling your eyes closed. Kami’s face was right next to yours, your hands on his chest. Being so close to Kaminari was nerve racking, and the feeling made you feel like being dropped from a 4 story building, the smell of his cologne making you feel warm.

“Come on-please tell me,” He asked as his fingers sat dangerously near your ribs-your tickle spot. His fingers brushed against your skin, sending rivulets of energy up your spine, making your head shoot up.

You looked at him, eyes wide.

“Denki I swear to god-“

“Hey love birds!” Sero yelled as Mina raised her chin as a greeting to you two, “come On! Our Fastpasses to Star Tours are almost up!”

You looked at Kaminari, an evil grin on your face as you poked his stomach on the side.

Kami grabbed his stomach instinctively, even though it didn’t hurt at all.

“You’re mean.” He said with a fake pout.“

“And you’re a nerd.”

“But you already knew that about me,” he replied, making you shake your head.“

”I guess,” you replied smiling,

“Wait-,” you asked, “didn’t you want to buy a lightsaber?”

“Yeah… Maybe I can-“ Denki began, but the sight of Sero frantically waving him down and pointing at the time on his phone made him think otherwise.He sighed.

“I guess I can get it later.”

“You sure?” You asked, knowing how much Kami wanted that toy.“

“Yeah, Yeah,” He reassured you, “I can get it later. Besides- we have all day.”

You looked back at the table, trying to make a plan that would satisfy everyone.

“Well what if I stayed back and got you the lightsaber?”

“Wait no y/n I can’t let you do that!” Kamianri protested. “We said we were going to do Star Tours and try to get one of us to be the spy, remember! I dont want to ruin our plans because of this.”

“But-” you protested.

“Please, I don’t need it-lets just go-I’m fine, seriously!”The more he talked, the more desperation played in his voice.

You gave him an unconvinced look. “Are you sure??”

“Yeah, Yeah,” He said in a fake airy manner, “I’ll be fine-I’ll just-get it later.”

He shrugged his shoulders and grabbed your hand, leading you to the group, Izuku back to being latched on to Shouto and everyone looking way more energetic than before.

“Lets go fight some space baddies!” Mina yelled, Uraraka and Sero cheering as they jogged out of the store, you four following behind.

————-

Later never really came. Ride after ride after ride, and it seemed Kami was never going back to that shop.

Night had now fallen, and you felt Kami’s hand fidget in yours.

“Do you think we’ll be able to go back?” He asked, his big puppy dog eyes boating into yours.You wanted to go back, but your call back time for the adults to drive all the students to the hotel was in 10 minutes, and you were a whole 2 lands away from the designated meet up spot. There was no way you could convince the group to walk more, and no way to expect to buy that lightsaber in that time.“I don’t know…” you said, not wanting to bring his hopes down.

You know Kami would try his best to not look disappointed, but he never was very good at covering his emotions up.

As expected, you watched his face fall a little.“Awwww...I guess I’ll just have to do it next time…”

Even though you thought it was slightly childish to want a toy so badly, you thought it was cute and adorable, and it broke your heart a little to see the one thing he wanted to go unfulfilled. It was like watching a kid on Christmas not receive the one gift their heart desired so desperately-it was heartbreaking and little guilty to watch.You grasped his hand, rubbing your finger against his skin, wondering how you could fix the situation. That’s when a light bulb went off.You turned to Denki, false distress on your face. You let go of his hand, turning to the group as you yelled, “I gotta go to the bathroom-I’ll met with you guys later!” And instantly running off, completely startling Kami and everyone in the group.

Everyone was focused on their bloated bellies, tired feet, and sleepiness, so the sound of your voice breaking their quiet self muddling completely startled them shit less. Kami shook his head as he tried to comprehend what happened in his worn out state,watching your back as you ran off.

Uraraka walked up between Kaminari and Sero who had took your place next to Kami, pointing at a crowded corner a few feet away from the trio.

Uraraka cocked her eyes, asking, “She knows the bathrooms there, right?”You were nowhere to be seen, and Kamianri looked around confused. “Where did she go?” He asked, completely bewildered by your actions.

After Izuku reassured Kami that you would come back after a few minutes of him yelling frantically for you like you were a lost child, they rushed back to the assigned meet up spot. The night air drifted coolily through Kamianri’s hair and clothing, cooling his warm body. The sound of crickets chirping on the ground and the soft blinking of lights in the trees made him feel like he was in a dream like state-until he thought of you. When he finally realized you hadnt made it back, his heart rate shot up, his senses going into overdrive. Instinctively, he began to think of every possible bad scenario-you somehow getting so lost you wouldn’t make it time and get in trouble, you getting hurt, someone Kidnaping you… the scenarios went on and on, becoming more ridiculous and more scary nevertheless. He stood there, deciding to call you and ask if you are okay, until he finally saw you running up, a Disneyland bag in your hand as you desperately tried to shove it in your backpack with little success.

He jogged up towards you, smiling slightly as he breathed a breath of relief. His face took in a serious note as he asked, “Where did you go?”

You cocked your eyebrow mischievously, giving him a slight grin.

“Nowhere-Just the bathroom.” You stated matter of factly, disguising your smile by tying up your hair.

Kami could tell you were lying just by the pitch of your voice-it always went up slightly because you were excited or nervous to tell him something.

He chuckled as he shook his head.

“You are a-terrible liar,” he laughed.

“Oh don’t act like you’re any better Denki,” you smiled as patted his cheek.“Now come on,” you grabbed his hand tenderly, “we got a bus to catch.”

————-

He didn’t see you the rest of the night after roll call. Kami sat next to Sero the whole ride back due to the stupid “gender-with-gender” rule they have on school trips, and checked into his hotel room with him. He sat on the bed, sending you a good night text as Sero changed out of his clothes and fell asleep in seconds.

Denki stayed up, waiting for your reply. He wasn’t worried that you were taking awhile because he expected you were taking a little more time going to bed. His eyes began to become more droopy, and before he knew it he was fast asleep.

Morning came, Kaminari stretching up with a loud yawn. The warm California sun flitted through the curtains, blinding him. He rolled over, checking the time on his clock: 6:15 am.

He groaned, rubbing his eyes: damn this bright light waking him up so early. He debated whether on not to just suck it up and close the curtains, but he knew if he did he would wake up and be screwed the rest of the day.

He laid on his back, thinking quietly as Sero snored in the bed next to him. A smile dawned on his face- if he could sneak into your room, he could go and snuggle with you and go back to sleep. He knew that you were bunking with Uraraka- but- she wouldnt mind right? Nah.

He got up, stretching, and grabbing his pillow as he opened the door. To his surprise, though, right in front of the door was a blue Disneyland bag, the castle adorning the front as Tinkerbell happily tapped the tallest tower with her wand.

He looked down, confused- the hell left this here? He looked at his sleeping friend, racking his brain to remember if maybe Sero bought something yesterday that he left on the floor when he feel asleep. Kaminari couldnt remember, confusion plastered on his tired face.

He bent down, feeling his sore feet as he checked the bag. There was a single note on it, the stationary having the name of the hotel at the bottom. He noticed it was your handwriting, immediately recognizing the loops and angle of the words that made it yours.

The note didn’t have much to read. The only words written on it were-“Sorry not sorry ;)”

He smiled, shaking his head, setting the note down as he pulled out a blue lightsaber out of the bag.

Kamianri gasped in shock and excitement. He already had a feeling what was in the bag you had earlier, but he was so tired he didnt even think twice to prod you anymore about it He bite his lower lip, his heart swelling with love. He didn’t know why you went through all that trouble for him. His smile widen, his body giddy with excitement.

If he could, he would go and propose to you right then and there.

————-

Should I write more Disneyland stories for the boys? Cause this was fun!

(RULES | MASTERLIST| REQUESTS OPEN!!! :))

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citrusandbergamot · 4 years

Text

so I haven’t watched the untamed yet

but in typical me fashion I have started reading fanfiction what is my problem I have so much due tomorrow the fuck

and I know, in the depths of my stupid emotional heart, that Jiang Cheng is my fave

the same way that Anakin Skywalker is my fave. I mean, I love Luke more than anything, and Obi-Wan is the best the BEST for loneliness!angst and survivor’s guilt and also the dry goddamn wit and the “how far can you push one person” levels of endurance

but Anakin Skywalker is my fave

if the troubled birds quote “he had an uncontrollable temper that made him literally insane when angry but he was good-looking” can describe them, then yes, they are my fave.

also worthy of consideration - I like Caranthir, Celegorm, and Maedhros the most out of all the Feanorians. Caranthir and Jiang Cheng give off the same energy, except Jiang Cheng is probably worse because he’s the youngest child, and being the youngest child myself, there is miles and miles and miles of entitlement to attention and preference, and soooo many feelings of inadequacy that nothing you can do can ever change (so why bother, right? I mean, I am beyond glad I’m not a middle child, I have enough issues thank). I love feral!characters who are angry and do bad things and hurt people and I also love the characters who are proud, who will not apologize or bend even though they do more damage to their loved ones and to themselves by refusing to change. (Interestingly enough, I find angry!Dean winchester to be fascinating to watch, basically cause his competence at killing things is sexy but I do not consider Dean to be a fave character. Angry!Sam though, he would fit into what I’m saying. But Sam had the anger Cage!bent out of him and so *shrugs*) I just... it’s one of the things I love about stories with characters who do bad things. They’re not just faceless monsters, they’re not cartoon villians. They are people who hurt, and want, who have been hurt by others, who think they HAVE to do what they are doing, and so they do what they have always done. Because if they stop, if they look for one second beneath the anger and the pain, they would drown. You can’t go back, and so the path that you walk is the path that will dominate your life, for the rest of your life. How can you apologize when you keep doing the thing that is causing harm?

if you can change, than you could have changed before. if you were better, you never would have fallen so far. but there is something monstrous inside, and it eats away every soft touch, every outstretched hand, every hope. better to embrace the truth, better to push everyone away, better to hold onto anger. then you can fight, then you can stand tall, then you can survive; you can rage against the unfairness. It has made you bitter, it has made you cruel. You can make them all hurt. where else can that hurt go? The hurt that is inside? The hurt tearing you apart? Better to rage than to give in, better to hate than forgive. Better to hate than need forgiveness. What could forgiveness count? too much has happened for forgiveness. There is no way back across the river Sirion, as a Feanorian would say.

you have to keep your anger wrapped tightly in your fist. hold on to the hurt. How else could you stand it? How else could you ignore the howling emptiness inside you, the well of grief that has no end?

I added a couple paragraphs of Stars Wars Return of the Jedi Anakin Skywalker fanfic because I had things to say and it seemed like Anakin could say them, so that’s under the cut. Whoops.

I think about Anakin Skywalker, trapped in a suit, unable to feel the touch of another’s hand, unable to feel the light of the sun, unable to feel the whisper of a warm breeze. Unable to smile, to see through his own eyes. Unable to turn from his dark path.

Until the end. When his son said, I need you, Father help me. Father, father, how could he be a father? He was a monster, burned and shattered, and held together with pain and a promise of vengeance. He was a faceless horror, attack dog and executioner. Kinslayer (ha!). Who would claim him as family? How could this boy claim him as family, while his friends died in the battle around them?

But he did. Father, help me. And Anakin Skywalker, the boy born in the light of the twin sons, the boy who wanted to be loved, who wanted family and safety and peace, looked out through Darth Vader’s mask and saw his son, his son crying for his help. Saw his master, with lightning at his fingertips and sadistic delight on his face. Father, I need you, help me.

My son. Padme’s son. What heart did Darth Vader have to give? What heart could survive in a Sith? What could he do to stop his master, what could anything amount to, after so long?

Father, there is still good in you.

Darth Vader could do nothing.

Anakin Skywalker could save his son. His son, his son, he had promised to love his son. His hands had trembled against Padme’s belly when she told him the news. Her hands had stroked his hair. They had laughed. They had been so young. It had felt like flying when Padme placed her hands in his, the weightlessness of hurtling over an edge, leaning into the fall, daring the ground to meet you, daring gravity to catch you and pull you into the crash, her hand in his, his heart full of sunlight. what could gravity do to such a heart? what force could stop him? Anakin, you’re going to be a father.

Anakin was motionless, trapped in the center of a deadened husk, the ground rushing up to meet him. What force indeed. He had been falling for so long, he was insensate to it, the sickening lurch of nothingness beneath him, of nothing that could stop him. How much further could he fall? What would ever be enough? There was nothing there, nothing beneath him. Some days he was glad, because he would shatter such a foundation upon impact. Some days, he could convince himself the fall was over, a headrush, a bad dream. How could he still be falling if the abyss was all he could see? Father, help me. Please.

Once, Anakin had known. Once, Anakin had leaned into the fall and dared gravity to reach out its hands and pull him to the ground and slipped, laughing, laughing, from its grasp. Once, Anakin had loved, and was loved in return. His son, his son, his son had a smile full of sunlight and soft eyes. His son had a face etched in pain. His son had spoken without bitterness, without weapon. His son, letting go of his rage, His son, palms upturned.

His son, reaching out. There was the ground, after decades of the endless, bottomless dark. Anakin had longed for it, dreaded it, feared it, He had been afraid for so long. How had he done it, once? How had he leaned into the fall, unafraid? He had been falling for so long, what could lift him from it? He was pieces frayed and shattering, what could catch him? What could stop him now, with a heart full of hatred and hands made of ruin?

Father, please.

There is still good in you, I can sense it. The conflict.

Let go of your hate.

He was so weary. His hands shook. How could the sense memory that overcame him then, how could it still be his? his hands, his real hands pushing the controls of his pod-racer forward, knowing that he had to win. Knowing that he would. His hands on Padme’s skin, leaning into her kiss. She would recoil from his touch now, and she would be right to do so. What could he feel, through murderous, monstrous hands of her softness? He had held her tightly, in the fist of his love, his desperate, violent love pouring from his fist, outstretched. Fire raged around them. Fire raged within him, from him. Her words of love choked in lies. Her lies suffocated by his love, his powerful love. Padme’s hands rising, useless. Padme’s hands, curled-in.

Luke’s hand, outstretched. Padme’s son, his, theirs. He had a son, still; still, after everything, even though his son knew. Obi-Wan would have told him everything, everything that Anakin had ruined and yet his son could not hold onto hate. It was such an easy hate to hold; it fell from his grasp (human, mechanical, like Anakin’s own, Anakin who had maimed his son, his son, who looked to him for salvation; his son, whom he could save, if he could just, if he just could...) as water falls from hands clean. His son, after such grief and betrayal, with a heart made full in sunlight, asking --

Anakin leaned into the fall and was saved.

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