#「 crack 」

[vildo]

Analysis, Mr Spock?

#star trek #star trek tos #don’t know why I made what I made #james t kirk #captain kirk #spock #mr spock #spirk #star trek: tos #st tos #star trek the original series #tos #tos spirk #the original series #memes #kirk #kirk/spock #kirk x spock #space husbands #tumblr trash #shitpost #crack

[incorrectbatfam]

Ok so since Bart was raised in a video game and Kon spawned like 2 days ago, imagine if they never got the queer romance DLC uploaded into them. So when Tim starts dating Bernard they think that's just something they should be doing too because Tim's the smart one after all. Monkey see, monkey do… with each other. And then they're confused when Tim loses his shit and they're like, "We thought we were supposed to??? Why kiss boys if you don't want us doing the same??? We are lemmings, Timothy"

#tim drake #red robin #conner kent #superboy #bart allen #impulse #bernard dowd #timbern #konbart #young justice #young justice 1998 #superfamily #flashfam #batman #superman #the flash #batfamily #batfam #batboys #batbros #batkids #batsiblings #batman family #dc comics #headcanon #crack #batposting #shitpost #tw swearing

[guess1mjustheren0w]

The one where Husk is a tired of life in his 30s bartender in a gaybar falling for twinky Angel in his 20s who comes in every night to flirt with him. Husk is annoyed with himself for falling for Angel btw cause he does NOT have the energy but he'll try.

Background Bar owner Alastor X Lucifer who comes in every weekend to cause a bar brawl. It's the highlight of both their weeks.

Nifty is the bouncer no questions asked.

Vaggie is a part timer but comes in for fun too. Charlie's trying to flirt with her but is failing- She word vomits and Vaggie is obvious. They need an intervention it's been months.

Should I write?

#hazbin hotel #chaggie #radioapple #crack #hazbin lucifer #hazbin alastor #hazbin husk #hazbin hotel au #hazbin angel dust #huskerdust #shitposting #vaggie #niffty #hazbin charlie

[fanaticalthings]

Jason only resorts to his emergency signal when he's 0.1 seconds away from death and only when he's 100% reaching raw desperation levels of survival

BUT he also uses it when he's faced with the most mild of inconveniences, so the batfam are always stressed when they get his panic signal because is he about to fucking die or was he just locked out of the family Netflix account?

And obviously they can't take ANY chances, so it's always a 50/50 on whether the night ends with the fam huddled in the medbay of the cave, or whether all of them are fully costumed, weapons sharpened and ready to throw hands in Jason's apartment and Jason's just casually lounging on his couch like "Oh hey guys, I'm out of flour, can one of you run to get some?" with the most annoying shit-eating grin you've ever seen.

#imagine being a gothamite and watching each and every one of the batfamily single file entering and exiting a random flat #and batman's just fucking lugging 5 bags of flour like the world's fate is dependent on the delivery of those 5 bags of flour #ofc he only pulls the joke emergency signal when he KNOWS the fam have their own plans at that exact moment. #just to mildy annoy them #tim: i had a DATE and i dropped EVERYTHING to save your ass #and ur tellin me u just wanted someone to hold a flashlight while you repair your SINK?? #jason: so what im hearin is that your date is more important than your poor dead brother? i see how it is. #this is just jason's way of spending time with his family because he's too shy to just ask upfront #bruce might seem annoyed but deep down he's always glad jason is doing well and takes it as a sign that Jason just wants to see them #jason todd #red hood #batman #bruce wayne #batfam #batfamily #batkids #batbros #dc #crack #fanatical posting

[waytooinvested]

J'onn: Kara doesn’t think straight when it comes to Lena. The Superfriends: ... J'onn: Maybe I should rephrase that. Alex: Oh no, it’s out there, you can’t take it back. Nia: We were all thinking it

#supercorp #kara danvers #lena luthor #supergirl #incorrect supercorp quotes #incorrect quotes #crack

[crybabycunt]

Kate: I would never say, not even as a joke, that my wife is a bitch and I don't like her. It's just not true.

Kate: My wife is a bitch and I love her so much.

Kate: She is a dynamite, five-foot-three, Russian bitch and she’s the best.

Yelena: (blushing) Awww... detka.

#bishova #bishlova #yelena belova #kate bishop #hawkeye #black widow #incorrect marvel quotes #incorrect quotes #marvel incorrect quotes #funny #crack #bishova incorrect quotes #bishlova incorrect quotes #yelena belova incorrect quotes #kate bishop incorrect quotes #inspo: the mayor of nothing

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

Vaggie: Charlie said we can have as many kids as I can carry.

*camera zooms out to show Vaggie carrying 8 giant kids on her back, hips, shoulders, and arms*

I took that as a challenge.

Bonus:

Charlie: *rushes in holding a blanket bundle* Oh, Vaggie~

Vaggie: Hm? Ack! *grabs the bundle between her teeth and eyes widen when she sees a baby doll wrapped in it* HUH?!?!?!

Kids: *all lean in to see the bundle and squeal with delight*

MAMA'S PREGNANT AGAIN!!!!

#chaggie #rainbowmoth #fallenstar #charlie #vaggie #stop accepting the challenge vaggie #babies #crack #hazbin hotel #incorrect quotes

[wilsons-threelegged-siamese]

I should totally do art for a living.

#house md fanart #kinda #not really #crack #hilson #house md #james wilson #gregory house #i love these two #my babiiiiiiies

[woppsvt]

Smut texts with hyung line

title : needy S/O VS frustrating svt part. 1

genre : smut, funny, fake texts

tw : mention of sex, part of bodies, illness

#svt texts #fake texts #lemon #smut #seventeen texts #seventeen #kpop #blogging #crack #relationship #scoups #jeonghan #joshua #wen junhui #hoshi #wonwoo #woozi

[iamnmbr3]

The fact that by book 2 Harry thinks of Draco as his nemesis just delights me. Draco clearly decides if he can’t be Harry’s friend he’ll be his nemesis. You’d think this would flop epically because his competition is Lord fucking Voldemort but he succeeds because he really does live rent free in Harry’s head. Wild.

#drarry #humor #crack #Harry Potter #Draco Malfoy #my post

[kikaichuno]

I'm not going to explain the lore behind this one.

#ooc #crack #Shino Aburame

[piltover-sharpshooter]

'I hope you die': Weak, Overused, Meaningless, Implies Nothing.

'I hope your Champion gets an Infernal skin': Brutal, Devastating, Soul Crushing, Threat evident.

#occ #crack #league of legends

[cilil]

In a video I just heard a story about some influencer lighting lots of candles for a photoshoot only to discover a spider somewhere and decide to spray insecticide on it, which, you guessed it, is flammable and did the classic flammable thing where the entire room gets lit on fire, and all I could think was "lmao Melkor"

#melkor #morgoth #crack #shitpost #silmarillion #at least the spider was dead at the end

[soobwery]

TXT: WHEN YOU ASK FOR A SELFIE (with a lil twist)

genre: smau, crack, 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴 hour💯

warning: freaky (not really), mention of cheating.

masterlist

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content under the cut.❀

✎ Soobin☆

✎ Yeonjun☆

✎ Beomgyu☆

✎ Taehyun☆

✎ HueningKai☆

⊹₊⋆.˚୨୧⋆.˚₊ ⊹⊹₊⋆.˚୨୧⋆.˚₊ ⊹⊹₊⋆.˚୨୧⋆.˚₊ ⊹⊹₊⋆.˚୨୧⋆.˚₊ ⊹

#txt smau #crack #boyfriend texts #kpop smau #kpop #soobin x reader #yeonjun x reader #beomgyu x reader #taehyun x reader #hueningkai x reader #txt x reader #txt #tomorrow x together

[fanaticalthings]

Jason being the easiest kid is super funny. Bruce looking at Jason and remembering Dick at 18: “we can work through this. He’ll come around if I don’t give up on.”

Bruce, watching over a freshly street-snatched Jason: Why is he so calm

Having Dick as the rambunctious, feral, and unhinged first child must've given him SO much whiplash once Jason entered the picture. Lil guy just vibed in his own world. Just reading books and doing schoolwork. Baby Jason hurt nobody.

Bruce will just be going over the ground rules of the manor, remembering all the chaos Dick brought upon the household.

Bruce: No swinging from the chandelier.

Jason: ?? I wasn't planning to?

Bruce: No murder.

Jason: What? That never even crossed my mind-

Bruce: And please, for the love of God, don't sneak out and try to beat up the nearest criminal on our block

Jason:

Jason: WHO is responsible for these rules being created??

Bruce will just come home from a long day of work. He's tired and just wants a nice, quiet evening, but he's subconsciously psyching himself up to prepare himself for the chaos he'll witness once he enters the manor

but then Jason's just quietly doing his own thing, maybe even helping Alfred with some chores, reading, or just lounging about in the manor. In general, just causing no trouble and Bruce just turns to Alfred, all worried like, "Is he sick? I don't think children are supposed to behave this way."

#Bruce putting 'No chandeliar swinging' before 'No murder' speaks volumes of the battles he's faced #baby jay was just a lil guy :') #Bruce having a wholesome relationship with jason from the very start: I didnt know this was possible #Bruce and robin!jason were so soft like please read the 80s comics they were SO cute fnksjvkosk #Dick visiting for the very first time since he left home: Why the FUCK is it so peaceful here #Dick not being angry about Jason becoming robin but instead being angry that his new brother isnt driving Bruce up the wall: #'are you even WORTHY of being my successor?? WHERE is your drive?' #jason todd #bruce wayne #batman #red hood #robin!jason #dick grayson #nightwing #batfam #batdad #batfamily #batkids #incorrect quotes #dc #crack #fanatical asks #fanatical posting #sidenote anon i am so sorry for not answering this earlier i always forget to check my asks ;-;

[lurafita]

Drunk Alec

Alec being a completely ridiculous person when drunk.

Alec: "Magnus! Quick! Pretend to be my boyfriend so I can shake off that woman who has been flirting with me for the past five minutes!"

Magnus: "… Alexander, we are married. I'm your husband."

Alec: "So you won't pretend to be my boyfriend?!" shocked pikachu face

#magnus bane #alec lightwood #malec #shadowhunters tv #malec headcanons #crack #alec can't handle his alcohol #drunk alec is hilarious #at least he is in my mind