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vote-gaara · 1 year

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Tips For Writing Dialogue for Gaara - An Essay

Hello fic writers, today we're going to be taking a class on writing dialogue for Kazekage/Adult Gaara.

One of the biggest tragedies of the entire Naruto series is that we never actually got a good, solid chance to see Gaara interact on a personable level which leaves us having a hard time understanding how Gaara would react in friendly situations.

From canon and filler content, we get a glimpse of some of his communicative tendencies:

He's bad at interpersonal relationships and for that reason he finds them bothersome.

He's reserved, almost to a fault.

Uno reserve that and he trauma dumps/overshares to anyone and everyone no matter how inappropriate or weird the situation.

Often says some ambiguous and philosophical statement that kinda makes you wonder what the hell he's thinking.

(My favourite) He's super polite at times but extremely sassy at others.

From these tendencies, you start to get a image of a character who's actually kinda polar opposite of themselves.

How can you have someone who cares so much about protecting other people, yet finds engaging in interpersonal discussion or small talk with these same people cumbersome?

How do you have someone who is so taciturn and yet is so willing to lay their soul bare, sometimes for the world to see?

How do you get someone who is so professional and polite, and yet could roast you like you're a turkey at Thanksgiving?

Nature Vs Nurture

The answer lies in the "nature" of that person, and in this case, we're talking about Gaara's true nature. The one that you see when he talks to Yashamaru as a child, the person who tries to help the children of the village so that he could be their friend.

The true nature of Gaara is someone who wants to connect and socialize with other people. That's where you see the politeness, the philosophical and deeply honest emotional statements, and the person who wants to help and protect other people.

At his core, Gaara is a social person, so why isn't he? Why does he struggle so hard in communication to people outside of business related socialization?

You probably guessed it. The way Gaara was raised works against his inner nature which makes for an interesting character dynamic.

Immovable object, meet the unstoppable force.

One of the themes in Naruto is how shinobi should suppress their feelings, that only those who feel nothing can truly be strong. This is why Naruto himself was such an underdog. He was constantly putting his friends and ideals first, and his missions and his power last.

Gaara received this same training, but in a way that would inevitably break him. Mix that trauma with isolation and the result is someone who has an underdeveloped inner nature that is still in there, but is like a broken bird who can't fly...

Essentially you get Gaara.

Writing Dialouge for Gaara - Some Tips & Pitfalls.

Why is all the above important?

Well because Gaara happens to be an extremely tough character to write for, especially in fics where you are trying to develop him romantically or as a friend.

How can you strike this balance between Gaara's nature and his traumatic nurture? Here are a few things to think about...

Pitfall #1: Mute & Emotionless

Most people tend to make Gaara too mute, or they mistakenly attribute his quietness for him being emotionless. This is not true. In fact, everything about Gaara's character suggests he's more emotional than not.

Having a stoic demeanor does not equal inhuman levels of emotional numbness.

How to avoid:

When you're writing dialogue for Gaara, ask yourself if this is important? Does this thing that is being said by him need to be said?

Gaara finds friendly conversations and small talk bothersome, not because he doesn't want to be part of these conversation, but because he's bad at them.

When writing for Gaara, let him state things that are important first. Give him time to warm up before having characters encourage his emotional side. With the right coaxing, he will be able to have a perfectly normal conversation, albeit a little sentimental.

Example:

"What's the whether like today?"

"Very low chance of sandstorms, so your mission shouldn't be hindered." Gaara said without looking up from his paperwork.

"I wonder what the clouds look like today, I've always found them calming."

"I see," Gaara's attention finally pulled from his work as he looked up.

"Do you ever look at the clouds and look for shapes?"

"Sometimes..." Gaara said, "On missions, Temari would sometimes point up at the sky and would tell us what shapes she saw."

"That sounds really cute."

"It was nice. I cherish those memories."

Pitfall #2: He doesn't yell

This is going to sound super strange, but please let Gaara yell. LET HIM YELL...Or...at the very least, let him raise his voice.

This leans on the habit people have of making him emotionless or overly stoic. Let the boy be unhinged sometimes, please.

How to avoid:

Gaara has and does yell in the series, but in very specific circumstances.

Gaara remains cool under the pressure of battle, and he's also very calm when his own life is in danger, but he does get loud when it counts. For example, when he's rallying people or when someone he doesn't expect to show up at the battlefield shows up *cough cough* Naruto *cough cough*.

Just know that if you are giving Gaara the opportunity to be a little melodramatic, make sure you center him just as fast as the emotions came on. Gaara had excellent emotional control, so when the big ones do burst through, he's quick to seal them again.

Pitfall #3: No sense of humor

If you think Gaara doesn't have a sense of humor, I feel for you because he's subtly quite hilarious...albeit in a very mean-spirited way. If you like sass, you're gonna love the deadpan, dry-humored, high-brow comedy that he has hiding behind that poker face.

Also, he likes puns. He actually LOVES puns, and most of his jutsus (and his favourite food) are puns.

How to fix:

If you're not quick, you'll miss it because Gaara doesn't laugh at his own jokes and he offers those roasts served cold, on the deadest pan there is in the kitchen.

Honestly, just write him being sassy and then when a character asks "are you serious D: ?" Just have Gaara say "no."

It is also a little trial and error as to if Gaara is joking or not. If Gaara says something that kinda sounds like a joke, have your character laugh, if you have Gaara respond irritated, he wasn't joking; if he let's your character have their chuckle, he wasn't serious and is probably secretly pleased with himself for making someone laugh.

Also, if your character does laugh at something he says and Gaara is irritated with them because he wasn't joking, just have your character laugh harder. Why? Because what are you even doing if you're not writing to torment Gaara in social situations?

Besides, the hell is he gonna do about it, anyways?

Pitfall #4: He's become too talkative.

Now you're meeting me on the other side of the spectrum. The side where Gaara goes from robot to overly emotional and talkative.

Let me be frank with you, writing Gaara is a delicate balance that is super difficult because you could justify a lot of actions....under the right circumstances.

Yes, Gaara is an overshare-er sometimes, yes he sometimes natters on and on like a fool, yes sometimes he even says something way out of left field and everyone is like "we have to pretend we understand we know what he's talking about because he's Kazekage and it's polite."

Here' my tip for you:

Be clumsy with it.

Gaara tends to overshare when he feels someone is similar to him, he also tends to air his dirty laundry when something is really important and he wants someone to understand exactly how important that thing is. Gaara gets talkative as a polar opposite to his quietness in a way to demonstrate emphasis.

It's like when someone you know who never swears suddenly drops an F-bomb in a sentence and your ears perk up because there has to be a reason why your wholesome friend just channeled their inner-sailor.

Gaara talks a lot when he's trying to emphasis something important. Mostly these long monologues will be about Naruto, or his past, or something really emotionally biting. Sometimes they're in really weird moments with no regard for who's within ear shot.

Now there's another side to Gaara.

There's another internal chatterbox that can come out of him sometimes, and it's always really adorable when it does.

For those of you who have social anxiety and who overcompensate by chatting on and on and on....You feel me, and you feel Gaara, too.

Gaara is really bad at social situations, and for that reason he will flounder and get all flustered, and he will talk...And he'll talk...And he'll TALK in a loop he doesn't want to be in.

Did you want to know how far the price of iron fell in the Land of Wind's market?

No? Me either!

And yet Gaara has been monolauging about it in immense detail for the past 3 minutes. You don't want to hear about it, and he doesn't even want to talk about it himself, but it's too late. The flood gates are open and it's like a ball tumbling down a hill....Down, down, down it goes into conversational hell.

Is it awkward?

YES

Will Gaara plant himself in the corner and not talk for the rest of the social situation after he finds the courage to close his mouth?

YES

It it necessary to write him in these situations?

YES!

Do it. Condemn him to his corner of embarrassment for his social blunder, because honestly, that's why we love him. We love him because he's literally no different than any other human being who acts clumsily in a social situation for no reason other than that day they woke up unable to word-mouth-noise right (ever have those off days?).

The Golden Tip: How to force Gaara to talk instead of staying quiet.

This is actually a really fun tip, but if you're writing dialogue for Gaara in your fic, and you're unsure what you want him to say, pretend the conversation is taking place over text message instead.

This forces Gaara to talk, and also helps you to explore different ways Gaara may communicate with your character.

For fun, here are a few examples with an OC named Kaiya:

Hope this helps!

Happy writing dialogue for Gaara!

#gaara

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mediaflamingoos · 12 days

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Frieren: Beyond Journey's End is a Modern Classic By Savio Shi

Anime is now more popular than ever, with many titles such as My Hero Academia, SPY X FAMILY, Bocchi The Rock and Jujutsu Kaisen garnering mainstream attention. However, for every Death Note there’s a “I’m a Loser Who Does Nothing But Play Video Games All Day and Now I’m Reincarnated As a Super Powerful Half-Demon Half-Angel With The Power To Destroy The Universe With Only a Fart” (This is a parody of many trashy self-insert, wish-fulfilment “Isekai” animes where the protagonist gets transported to another world and becomes ridiculously overpowered and is surrounded with attractive women who fall head over heels for the protagonist despite his lack of any positive personality traits. And yes they really do have titles like this.) While there’s no shortage of good anime, great anime can be hard to come by. Friern: Beyond Journey’s End is one of them.

Frieren has one of the most memorable opening episodes of any shows I’ve watched, period. It begins with the end of the journey, after Frieren and her party of heroes successfully defeated the demon king. Here we’re introduced to a lovable cast of characters, including Eisen the steadfast and stoic Warrior dwarf, Heiter the alcoholic human priest, and Himmel the human Hero, the leader of the party. Frieren is a cold and detached elven mage, and the protagonist of the series. As an elf, her lifespan is extremely long, which has caused her to perceive time much more differently than her peers. After Himmel’s party is celebrated for their monumental achievement, they part ways, each having new goals and aspirations. Many years later, Frieren revisits her old friends only to find that they’ve all grown old. Her friends have all missed her greatly, but Himmel in particular had missed her the most. Himmel had always paid special attention to Frieren, and the two shared a special bond, though it was a somewhat one-sided one. After the four went out to see the shooting stars one last time, Himmel the hero passed away.

It was only at his funeral that Frieren suddenly realised that she hadn’t treasured her time together with Himmel. Tears fall from her face as she regrets not getting to know him better when she had the chance. It was an extremely profound and emotional moment that moved me as well. This prompted Frieren to change her perspective on life. She begins to realise that her near immortality has caused her not to value her often short-lived connections with humans, and so she embarks on a new journey, making new friends while reminiscing on her past friends, keeping them alive in her memory and carrying them onto the future.

Frieren: Beyond Journey’s End is about a lot of things. But its most powerful theme is that ultimately, we are the culmination of the people in our lives. This resonated with me deeply, as I’ve been fortunate enough to have made many meaningful connections with people from all ages and backgrounds. Some helped me understand myself better, some taught me things I never would’ve known, and some stood by my side in times of need. I may not be as long-lived as Frieren, but in my short 20 years I feel as though I’ve already made a lifetime of wonderful connections. Some of those connections will last longer than others, but just as Frieren realised, it is not the amount of time spent together that matters. If you treasure the time spent together, it will stay with you for a lifetime. I am Savio, but I’m also a collage of all the people who’ve been kind enough to let me be a part of their lives, and words cannot express how grateful I am for everyone who has made me the person I am today, but I’ll still give it a shot: Thank you.

word count: 639

#media studies #sousou no frieren #friendship #anime #fantasy

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ichayalovesyou · 2 years

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Bro can I hear more of your Una headcanons bro

OH BOY I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED! 🤩

Una Headcanons!! 💛

Like I said in my Una Loves Puzzles post I strongly headcanon her as autistic, or at least the Illyrian equivalent.

Autistic Una Headcanons/Character Analysis

I think she was absolutely a hyperverbal (as in talking full sentences by age two) and lining things up kind of autistic kid (which is my kind lol). She’s learned to reign it in a bit obviously but the organizing oh my gawd

I mean, have you SEEN how bubbly she gets at the prospect of organizing files?! Same vibes when I decide to rearrange the dvds or books in my house lmao. She clearly deeply enjoys repetitive/tedious tasks most people find boring or unpleasant. “Where fun goes to die” for YOU maybe! Chin-Riley and I are just built different. Spreadsheet nerd solidarity!

I know part of why people find her intimidating is because she’s first officer and tends to keep her distance (plus most people would look stern next to Chris let’s be real). She’s shown that’s she’s a gentle and caring person after you move past that though! I think the other part of it is that she comes off as stoic and hard to impress because that’s straight up just her face, her emotions and facial expression don’t always connect in a noticeable way. Another autism mood!

Probably had that more tender, friendly side of her on display before she had to hide her identity from Starfleet Academy. She seems lonely and wants to make genuine connections with people. She even got really chipper and funny by singing with ensign babey Spock in the turbolift in Short Treks. She starts letting herself do that outside of La’an with her blooming friendship with M’Benga. But it was really hard for her because she didn’t wanna out herself by letting people get too close. But since M’Benga knows the truth it’s easier.

What seems to be her absolute core motivation, for joining Starfleet, for connecting with people, for unraveling mysteries is this INTENSE and all-consuming desire to understand. Understand the world and the people around her, perhaps partially to help her better understand herself! Which is again, 100% a huge mood. It seriously informs how she interacts with people:

She has a natural affinity for closed off people, people with secrets, it’s why she’s good at keeping other people’s secrets and her own. She has a habit of gravitating toward people who are hurting very badly but doing a great job of fooling everyone else. Without exposing them in an uncomfortable way. It’s how she gets La’an to start therapy, gets M’benga to tell her about Rukiya, and gets Chris to question his complacency in his own future.

She shakes people up and makes them curious as to why they are the way they are. Her compassionate curiousity via not being 100% on conversational boundaries when she feels close to someone is genuinely infectious!

The Origin of “Number One”

Either her name was already Una and she changed her last name to sound more human (I bet we’ll get a real last name reveal after the whole court martial thing blows over). Or she changed her name to Una knowing that it meant one and started encouraging #1 as a nickname (I mean she even signs the scorch with it lol). That OR back during Academy days she didn’t know and Chris noticed and joked about it and it’s stuck ever since! Either option is absolutely freaking adorable!

Other little things (+more Autism lol):

She’s 110% a dog person, or a dog-like creatures person lol

NEEEEEEDS schedules and checklists, they’re the best thing ever invented, she has hundreds.

Extremely competitive in that she doesn’t care about winning, but she hates hates hates losing.

She hates the texture of the normal uniforms which is why she wears the jacket skant 90% of the time.

Is either a secret goth off duty or full on bright colors and clashy pattern and texture mixing to match her equally wonderful eccentric 60s inspired hairstyles. Possibly both! (Which, again, MOOD.)

Would double lace her boots if her boots had laces. Combat boots or light up sketchers, no in-between.

She does elaborate hair and makeup as a routine thing to keep her hands busy in the morning.

She’s messes with her hair as a stim which is why she keeps it out of the way so often, also Bouncy/Swingy Leg!

Might start holding back less with her ridiculous strength, maybe even be a lil’ bit of a show off. I’m just SAYING, she might be able to lift Chris (I’d kill to see that even once.)

She loves dad jokes and would make more if Pike wasn’t constantly generating a massive surplus. Pretends to not be amused because then Chris would be Too Powerful.

She unintentionally gets really loud when she’s happy. Seems like she’d do the happy flappy arms stim too.

Strawberries may be her favorite but I bet she’s a sucker for rhubarb pie!

Also I’m willing to bet money that she’s bi! 💖💜💙

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space-writes · 10 months

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for the weather asks: snow, sleet and fog!

hi fox!! ty for the ask (for this ask game)

❄️ Snow - Who is your coldest / most stoic character and how do they express themselves (if at all)?

Vren, probably. He's very closed off and blunt, more than cold. He's very awkward with words when I do make him actually deal with feelings, so he's much better at showing. Like he'd find it way easier to murder someone for you than say how he feels.

Fortunately (or unfortunately) Sorrow is into that.

Also you know how fucking stoic Rizeth is. Idiot emotionally repressed man with too many feelings my beloved. <3

Rizeth also shows his feelings through actions, but that's only because he's too much of a coward to act on them (<-i am yelling this at him through the window of his enclosure). He pays attention. But when he does express his emotions in words, it will be his usual to the point manner. He's not going to wax lyrical, he's just gonna say true things.

and one day so help us all that thing will be 'i love you, ashenivir'

🌨 Sleet - What's the most you've ever written in one sitting?

I HAVE RECORDS FOR THIS HOLD ON.

Nano 2021, drafting Renegade Prince, I got my first (and only) 10k day! I felt so fucking powerful let me tell you. Best I've done since then was some 7-8k days, and honestly, despite the high they give, i don't recommend them. They are extremely draining TT_TT

🌫 Fog - What was the hardest part of your WIP to write?

The ending of RP was a struggle. It's a big fight with a lot of moving parts, and just trying to visualise it all and get it all down was extremely hard for me, the person who cannot visualise well. Reading it back, it's way better than I thought when I wrote it though, which is nice.

#ask games #weather ask game #writeblr #valloroth blogging #obedience fic blogging #c: vren #c: rizeth velkon'yss

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mirajanefairytailmage · 1 year

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Rambling About a Show (02/09/2023)

⚠️SPOILER?!⚠️

😭 The last like five or so episode had me bawling so hard.

I seriously love how Orchid and Dongfang Qing Cang/Moon Supreme/Big Blockhead went from ‘don’t fall in love with me I like someone else’ and ‘there is no love between us’ to ‘I love you so much that I will sacrifice myself just so that you may live on’. 🥺 They were both willing to go through hell just to prove how real the love is. They didn’t care that they’re from rival realms. I felt a little heartbroken when it was revealed that Lady Arbiter was banished for falling in love with someone she wasn’t supposed. Poor Orchid was told that her master was traveling the world. They didn’t tell her the truth. However, it’s good to know that Moon Supreme and Orchid weren’t the only ones that had a forbidden love. Not only Lady Arbiter but also Li Yuan falling in love with and having children with a woman from the Moon Tribe. That was a twist I wasn’t expecting. Also can’t forget about the time Moon Supreme threatened to invade and conquer Shui Yun Tian and also get rid of anyone who dared to bully or harm Orchid. That was extra, but very like him. Well, the beginning version of him. Thanks to Orchid he slowly becomes more compassionate, understanding, patient, and loving.

Another thing is I ended up becoming more interested in Shan que and his budding relationship with Jie li. Poor Jie li felt she didn’t deserve his love because she was deceiving him. Granted she was doing it to survive because her heart was poisoned. Also, finding out she is one of the daughters of Li Yuan was a bit of a shocker. Wasn’t too surprised though. Especially when they showed Li Yuan’s secret about Dan yin. I thought Shan que proposing and Jie li saying yes was the most adorable scene. The way he lifted her up and spun her around out of happiness. So, of course I was heartbroken when at one point she said it was all fake and a lie. She only said that because of her circumstances. I’m glad that these two sorted everything out in the end.

Rong hao... I felt he was a shady character. However I didn’t expect him to be the Lord of Haishi. He had his reasons, but that doesn’t excuse his actions or his behavior. Also, not sure if his feeling for his master was familial or romantic. That wasn’t very clear. I mean, he did mention that he would do anything to bring back his master. Who happens to be the former God of War Lady Chidi.

As I was watching this, I couldn’t side with the fairy realm at all. The way most of them treated Orchid, before she risked her life to save them during the Immortal Examination was heartbreaking. Not only that but I thought it was extreme that they wouldn’t allow interracial marriages or love. Another thing that has been on my mind is why did Dongfang Qing Cang say he was the one who killed the Xilan people? Because if I remember correctly that was Rong hao’s fault because he was looking for the Goddess Xiyun. Because she was the only one that could bring Lady Chidi back to life. Which she turned out to be Orchid in disguise for that very reason.

I was living for all the silly parts between Orchid and Dongfang Qing Cang. When Orchid had to sacrifice herself I cried so hard. Also when Moon Supreme broke her heart just so that she would stop loving him. Because that was the only way for the Bone Orchid bracelet to be removed. That scene alone was hard to watch without crying. Then there’s the fact that she chose him over Lord Chang heng. Another scene that had me crying. Listen, this show had me all sorts of emotional from beginning to end. I loved every bit of it.

I forgot to mention that I love the duality of Dongfang Qing Cang and Orchid when they switch bodies. Because it's absolutely hilarious how he can go from stoic and stern to silly and adorable. Then Orchid goes from silly and adorable to stoic and stern. 🤣 It's just fantastic.

#rambling about a show #cdrama #chinese drama #love between fairy and devil

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creativebrainrot · 1 year

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I don't know your OCs very well, so I'll say this is for whomever you want to talk about most right now! 💖 🍊 🧡 😊 💧

thank youu <33 ill answer with Maelgwyn since i dont talk about him enough despite always thinking about him!

💖 Has your OC ever been in love, be it romantic or platonic or otherwise? Who with and did they ever express their feelings or keep it private? How long did these feelings persist / do they still feel this way?

(Romantically) Twice. For the very first time with a woman from Amnoon. It was an extremely natural progression, she was first to confess, but they both knew they loved eachother a while before that. They met eachother early on in his bounty hunter days. She was working at the Definitely-Just-A-Bar joint he frequented for work. The two parted ways when her and her family were accepted as refugees in Lion's Arch. She gave him her favorite earring, and he gave her his favorite ring. They always hoped to find eachother again. Maelgwyn just isn't willing to leave Elona. Neither ever stopped loving the other.

The second time he fell in love, it was with the Pact Marshall, Trahearne. (he lives in my lore.) It was one of those "maybe this is just a crush" > "oh no oh god oh fuck feelings oh n-" slowburn things on Gwyn's end. Trahearne was the first to confess his love, Maelgwyn was first to realize he was in love. They are still in love (post EoD) and live in the Crystal Desert together.

🍊 What is your OC’s favourite meal? Snack? Dessert? Drink? Any reasons behind this besides liking how it tastes?

any hearty meaty meal with vegetables and breads. curries, pot roasts, 1-pan fried meals, he fuckin' loves em. he really really loves curries. also really likes fruits. papaya & dragonfruit are favs.

🧡 Who is your OC’s favorite person? Why is this person the top of their list and have they actually met them (an idol or rolemodel or celeb can be someone’s favorite after all!).

Gwyn has two absolute favorite people in his life currently. The Bartender at his main haunt, and Trahearne. The Bartender- Zefiro, because he was like a father figure or an older brother. He tried pretty hard to help Gwyn with, life, basically. Zefiro and Gwyn are still close friends, and Gwyn still goes to that bar often.

Trahearne because when Gwyn met him he seemed to have everything under control. That cool, calm, collected Leader's demeanor was impressive to him, considering the pact's goals, and how many people looked up to Trahearne. Later, when Gwyn's tree became stronger and called him back to help the other Dusk Firstborn, Gwyn had no fuckin' clue about any of that firstborn shit. Trahearne helped him, a lot. (Gwyn was also very unprepared for having siblings, he spent his whole life convinced he'd be alone with only one person that got, understood, him.

😊 What can make your OC smile even when they’re feeling down? What cheers them up and makes everything feel better for them? Is your OC generally a happy person and do they enjoy making others smile? What about your OC makes others happy?

His raptor Cricket, who is just a goofy bigass golden retriever disguised as a raptor. Good food and a good hunt. Gwyn is very stoic but on the inside he feels emotions a bit more vividly than other people. He's not happy-go-lucky at all but he's not a somber stick-in-the-mud like he looks like he'd be. In the right environment & mood he knows how to have a good time. Gwyn is very protective and kind underneath his exterior. He'll leave home-cooked lunches on his friends' desks after they've had a bad day, or slip a trinket they were admiring at the market into their bag. Just Because. (also prone to innocuous comments others find funny)

💧 What is the earliest memory your OC can recall? Do they know what their first words were or remember where they took their first steps? Do they have any mementos of their childhood they’ve kept such as a stuffed toy or tiny baby clothes?

Gwyn's earliest memories are his name and it's meaning being said, the cavern he woke up in, the strange and withered tree in front of him. Gwyn's first five years alive were the worst of his life, he's kept nothing from this time.

[Ask Game]

( @sleepysshadows )

#thewordboxresponse #SORRY FOR THE SUPER LATE ANSWER @-@#TYVM for the ask!! <3 #maelgwyn #oc: maelgwyn (he/any)

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star-anise · 3 years

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I'm up around 3am, thinking about incels and tradwives. (Note: If these are movements you're a fan of, or if you just want to fight with me generally, I will block you if you annoy me, and even if you behave there's a $20 fee if you expect me to actually reply to you in any way.)

This got started because of Khadija Mbowe's and F.D Signifier's videos about Black patriarchy, which has led me to pick up bell hooks' 2004 book The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love.

The thing that hooks says that really knocked my socks off in a "how dare you notice that" way is that a lot of people, men and women alike, are angry not just because of the male violence they've experienced, but because of the lack of male love they've experienced.

Which like, part of being human means that being seen and cared about is pretty viscerally equated with survival in our brains. We want it, we need it, we suffer when it isn't there. To be seen and genuinely loved by the people in our lives matters, so we are always affected when there's someone important to us who doesn't seem to see us, to love us, to care about our wellbeing, or to be proud of our accomplishments. It matters to be disregarded, rejected, or shamed by someone we want to love us.

But no power in the world can compel another person to give a shit about you—a truth most of us spend our lives frantically suppressing because being unloved is terrifying, so we work at being better, more attractive, smarter, more accomplished, more charming, sexier, or to be brutally honest, more lovable. But when we do experience a lack of love, a lot of us take that anger and decide to opt for second best. If we can't be loved, we can at least be powerful. Power can take a lot of forms, but because the lack of male love often goes hand-in-hand with violence, people who face it generally want, at the very least, to not be hurt anymore.

But there's another element in play. Patriarchal gender roles divide behaviours and skills in a very particular way: Boys and men are expected to use power to dominate, and girls and women are supposed to use emotions to tend and nurture. Anyone who fails to perform those roles gets harshly punished. Terrence Real talks about how this leaves men with very limited knowledge of their own emotional needs or how to communicate them to other people, and Paul Kivel talks about how boys are taught that this is women's work—that if they are masculine enough, they will attract a woman who will make sure that they feel loved and cared about. How a great deal of men's anger towards women is the feeling that women are witholding this essential service, or failing to fully handle men's emotions (which is pretty damn common, since humans aren't telepaths so it's basically impossible to reach inside someone's head and change their emotions for them).

So hooks notes that women are just as likely to uphold patriarchal gender roles as men, and one element of that is women's anger when men are emotionally vulnerable. Men who confess to their partners that they feel lost and ashamed and unworthy of love are doing exactly what women keep saying we want men to do, but the reaction many women have is a kind of incredulous frustration—"You want me to handle all this? Fuck no, I'm busy!"

Part of that reaction is that in patriarchal gender roles, it is a woman's literal job to completely soothe and manage her male partner's emotions—to diligently praise him, make him feel more accomplished, and to reassure him of her ongoing love and admiration in all things. And that is a lot of work that is quite likely not to succeed because it's really hard to talk someone out of a self-hating funk. (There's also an element of just plain sexism. Even without the implied demand for help, some women just think men's vulnerability is pathetic or laughable.)

The feminist response to this that hooks, Real, and Kivel advocate for is to spread the load a little more evenly; to work to reduce the violence with which gender roles are policed, to allow men to be soft and emotional, but in the process, give them the emotional skills to handle the shame and dread we all feel sometimes about not being lovable or or worthy, and empower them to form many different emotionally fulfilling relationships.

So the thing about incels is, they tend to be obsessed with finding a woman who will make them feel worthy, sexy, accomplished, admirable, and dominant, like a "real man". The prospect of getting a woman is the single potential oasis of love and support in an incredibly bleak desert landscape in which a romantic partnership is the only possible source men are permitted to seek love and care from. A man who hasn't gotten a girl is a pathetic loser whose life is meaningless.

What that entire worldview takes for granted is how the desert became a desert in the first place. How boys learn to fear the violence and rejection that comes from stepping out of their gender role by being emotionally vulnerable or by emotionally nurturing somebody else; how emotional knowledge and expression are punished by a system that says men should always seek to dominate. The desire for a female partner rests on a bedrock of learned fear and contempt for the idea that men can or even should have the kind of emotionally close and supportive friendships among themselves that women tend to have with each other.

Incels are the fucking allegory of the long spoons in action. They gather in huge numbers to discuss their pain, frustration, and disappointment about their difficulty attaining a relationship that provides emotional fulfillment, but it's impossible for them to try to seek or offer that kind of relationship with the many many people right there also looking for love, because violating the gender rules means inviting violence and ostracism. Affection and mutual esteem between men is super gay and doesn't count, especially when it's provided because of a mutual vulnerability instead of admiration for achievement. So it's incredibly hard for incels to in any way break out of the mental cage that says the way to be loved is to be as masculine, as stoic and unemotional and successful and admirable and dominant as possible. And because being dominant tends to require people to be better than, incels spend a lot of time criticizing each other for failing to be masculine enough, and therefore not worthy of love.

Meanwhile... tradwives.

If you're into men, the dream of being truly loved by a man who will take care of you and make your life materially better is fucking amazing stuff. That's just... that's just The Dream, okay? The romance industry's extreme popularity decade after decade will tell you what bell hooks also notes: Women who are into men want to be loved by men SO MUCH.

So it really seems to me that the basic appeal of being a tradwife is managing to be submissive enough to get the men they love to genuinely show up and fully commit to loving them. If conflict in relationships happen because men feel threatened in their masculinity or not fully loved by their wives, then gosh darnit, these women will plaster themselves over the cracks to make sure there are absolutely no problems. That will earn them a relationship where they are truly loved and appreciated.

(It's a trap. I hate to say it, but we're not a telepathic species, and you will never manage to be good enough to actually change what someone else feels. No matter how hard you submit, your husband will still feel moments of doubt and fear and inadequacy, because he's human and we're built like that. It's the cross we have to bear as a species. And it does not go well at all if both of you are used, in those moments, for blaming you for whatever you "did" to "make" him feel that way.)

#long post #staranise original #feminist discourse

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lokiskitten · 3 years

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I NEED a part two of “first time”

Loki Laufeyson | first time pt2

Loki Laufeyson x fem!reader

plot : ( refer to pt1 ) after experiencing a first intercourse together, Loki insists on crossing the path towards the end. With only the fear of being seen by the other variants holding you back, you end up agreeing to follow the excited man’s proposition.

warnings : smut, extremely short moment of none-con followed by a consent check up, mention of virginity loss ( male ), unprotected sex ( pls for the love of god wrap it ) and lowkey sub!Loki.

“Now that was... ah. Nice.” You affirmed tiredly, knees colliding with one another though your feet remained slightly parted. Your organism was still trying to wash away the orgasm you had just reached with Loki’s divine help. Meanwhile, the god of mischief carried on staring at your body, resembling a scientist who led an experience on the human anatomy. He wanted to ask a thousand questions, but didn’t feel brave enough to dare to open his mouth just yet. In fact, he felt as if he was disturbing an intimate and personal moment of yours. It nearly managed to make the god feel flustered and awkward.

Looking closer, Loki was able to spot your own love juice dripping out of your entrance, coating your swollen lips and settling a deep emotion of lustful hunger within his soul. He wanted more, he needed more- and only you could potentially satisfy his crippling and frustrating sexual appetite at the moment. His hands rested on your knees, forcefully parting your thighs before he allowed himself to slip in between. Upon feeling a weight suddenly add up against your own mass, your eyelids moved open which allowed you to make eye contact with Loki. You felt surprised to see him there, and even more surprised to witness him behaving in such a way.

“What are you doing?” You asked, attempting to move your chest up with the help of your elbows- which led Loki to back away to sit down on his knees between your legs. “Well, I’m doing the thing. Isn’t that what people do next?” He explained, earning a frown from your shocked self. Though, you were still willing to be patient with him. “No, you always ask. Always. Do you understand?” You affirmed seriously, earning a shy nod from the demigod who didn’t really enjoy to be treated like a child. Though his aim wasn’t to ruin this moment by starting unnecessary drama- especially as he appeared to be in the wrong. But once this small moment of embarrassment had passed by, Loki felt like explaining the reason to why he appeared so frustrated.

“Look, I have a very painful..” he began, only to end up being cut off by your staring self who admired the long shape traced from within his pants. It was too big to miss. “Boner.” You finished before looking up at him, earning an embarrassed gasp coming from the demigod. “And I really want you.” He finished on a nearly sorrowful tone adding up to a puppy face- a note that managed to reach your heart. You shot a glare at the small wooden cabin in which Mobius and the other variants were having dinner, anxiety taking over your organism at the thought of potentially being seen or caught by them. “I don’t know..” You explained, earning a frown from Loki sitting before you who didn’t appear to understand why you were refusing the offer after you had both experienced such fun.

“Aw come on. What could possibly go wrong?” He cheered, giving your shoulder a gentle fist kick in order to lift the mood. Unfortunately, you couldn’t help but remain stoic. “Well, loads of things in fact.” You responded, leading Loki’s smile to drop instantly. “What if we get caught? That would be an embarrassment I’d never be able to get over. Not to mention the whole pregnancy issues if your princess self isn’t capable of pulling out at the right time.” You carried on, offering Loki multiple exemples to why this upcoming sexual intercourse could possibly go wrong. Ironically enough, he appeared more concerned and offended over the fact that you had just called him princess rather than getting worked up about the horrible consequences program you had just settled.

After spending a couple of seconds making useless eye contact with the raven haired man, you ended up breaking this one in order to shoot another glance towards the wooden cabin. The surroundings appeared calm, which managed to ease your anxiety. Besides, after leading you to cum in such an incredible way, you believed that maybe Loki deserved a release too- adding up to the fact that you’d feel proud to be the woman who would take care of breaking through his virginity. Turning your head back towards his, a nod was the only gesture that escaped your body. It instantly managed to lift the demigod’s mood. “Really?..” Loki asked, and that in order to make sure you weren’t tricking him, the most famous trickster.

“Yeah, lets give it a try.” You responded on a friendly tone, a discreet smile adorning your features as you watched Loki summon a blanket for the two of you. He had probably noticed the way you appeared to avoid dust with the help of your pants, and wanted to offer you better then this piece or clothing to protect your sensitive skin. However, he appeared to organize this upcoming event in quite a religious way. He made sure to keep the blanket flat against the floor, brushing away the wrinkles until you finally stopped him by taking ahold of his wrist. “This is the part where you take your clothes off.” You affirmed, underlining the fact that he probably should stop worrying about the wrong matters especially as you were running out of time.

“Oh, right right.” He answered politely, taking a seat on the green pled before he began to precariously unbutton his TVA shirt. You watched as his tone muscles were revealed, his abs shifting as he got rid of his upper piece of clothing for good. This checkpoint led you to look up at his greenish eyes again, the two of you exchanging a smile before he began to go for his belt. The shape of his hard member was still visible through his trousers, a length that would soon be set free once Loki would finally get rid of his pants. No shame or embarrassment seemed to fill his organism upon his lower clothes being pulled down to his knees- his crotch being revealed to your respectful sight. In contrary, Loki appeared more than proud of himself for finally getting to go through such a thing, which held him back from accumulating negative emotions.

Your two naked selves then laid down on the blanket, wrapping your arms around one another’s body and engaging in a rather friendly but passionate hug. You enjoyed this warm and safe physical contact, and you expected Loki to enjoy it too. The sensation of his moist tip rubbing against your stomach only made it better- as you still felt amazed regarding the size of his member. It combined both generous length and girth, and was also gifted with the perfect shape any woman, or man, could ever ask for. “You smell nice..” he affirmed, his nose being stuck to the crook of your neck as you happily passed your hands through his black hair. He ended up looking up at you, pressing a shy and respectful kiss to your lips. You smiled.

It didn’t take long for the two of you to roll around, switching to Loki now resting on top of you. He smiled down out you out of pure excitement, his tip already trying to find a way into your entrance- as clumsy as his hips could be. After taking notice that he appeared to have a hard time lining himself up with your hole, you slipped a hand down between your legs and gave his balls a gentle caress, earning a couple of sensitive moans coming from your excited partner. However, your hand then proceeded to slither it’s way up his shaft, delicate digits wrapping around this one’s girth in order to move it to where it should and wanted to be. When you felt like Loki was now ready to carry on on his own, your hand made its way back up to his shoulder before passing underneath his arm and wrapping around his smooth and muscular back.

The raven haired man looked down at you with slight panic in his eyes upon being aware that a single hip thrust of his could begin the intercourse, his shoulders now having to carry a great responsibility he simply wasn’t ready to fail. Unfortunately, Loki once again appeared to struggle with pushing himself in. Even when looking down at your crotch, he still didn’t manage to properly slide inside of you. However, upon taking notice of his distress again, you agreed to slip your hand back down to his groin, taking a gentle hold of his shaft which you locked between your thumb and index finger before offering him a little bit of help regarding penetration. Thankfully, his cock was now able to slide inside of you on it’s own even if it remained a slow process.

Moving your hand away, you allowed Loki to fully take over the penetration process as you watched his facial expressions clench and contract. Eventually his eyelids shut close, hips colliding with yours as his tip dangerously brushed against your sensitive cervix. You could tell that this was brand new for him, and that he visibly had a hard time handling it. “You’re doing amazing.” You affirmed empathetically, your hand gently caressing his flexed biceps. Meanwhile, Loki couldn’t help but focus onto the warmth your walls provided him, his brain still attempting to process how nice it felt to finally get to be coated in a woman’s love juices. It was tight, moist, and warm- long story short : the perfect environnement for his needy member.

“Maybe try to give moving a try..” you proposed shyly, your organism beginning to feel more than overwhelmed by Loki’s filling presence inside of you. After hearing about this offer, Loki began to slowly back away from your crotch, shiny length, which was coated in your love juice, sliding out of you with relative ease. The two of your moaned, though you appeared calmer than your friend at first- who you didn’t forget was currently going through his first intercourse ever. Therefore, judgment wasn’t present. It didn’t take long for a regular thrusting process to take place, your overly sensitive walls nicely reacting to the friction caused by Loki’s cock especially after getting to orgasm beforehand. Your arms remained wrapped around his back, the two of you rocking back and forth against the green blanket.

“You’re doing so good..” you whispered in his ear, eyelids remaining closed as your hand had now taken ahold of his long raven hair. Your main goal was to enhance him through this event, and give him the happiness and recognition he clearly deserves as a bed partner. However, your natural tightness adding up to the more than large size of his girth was overstimulating Loki’s genitals, sending shockwaves of pleasure down his shaft and straight into his tensed balls which repetitively bumped against the area located beneath entrance. “Don’t forget to- to pull out.” You begged breathlessly, his thrusts becoming more primal and intense now that he had gained some extra self esteem regarding the situation.

You couldn’t help but grow worried and work yourself up over this intercourse’s potential end, wondering if the man on top of you was going to be able to control himself and pull out before his cum could penetrate into your womb. Thankfully, this annoying state didn’t last for long and you soon found yourself lost into lust again. Your arms wrapped around his neck, teeth gently biting down onto his earlobe as you allowed yourself to tug on it in a primal yet harmless manner. Loki seemingly appeared to appreciate this move, another wave of moans exiting his mouth as he unexpectedly pulled out of your cunt in order to allow his own hand to wrap around his shaft.

A couple of pumps were enough to see white liquid spring out of his urethra, the sperme landing on your stomach and staining your delicate skin. You were both left breathless, for nearly the exact same reason as one another. Resting your hand onto your chest, you panted whilst looking down at the substance on your tummy which appeared surprisingly appetizing. “Loki..” you moaned gently, fingers brushing against one of the stained parts of your stomach before you brought your digit up to your lips. Even if you hadn’t tasted many, his cum appeared different than the rest on the gustative level. “That was amazing.” You affirmed with a smile, extending your arm for him to join you on the blanket. You were craving for his touch, more than you had ever craved anything before.

[ part one available right here ]

As requested, here’s part two! I hope it was enjoyable for you guys to read. Don’t hesitate to leave feedback, it means tons. Stay safe and happy❤️

#loki #loki laufeyson #loki laufeyson fanfic #loki laufeyson fluff #loki laufeyson imagine #loki laufeyson smut #loki laufeyson x reader #loki laufeyson x you #marvel #marvel imagine #tom hiddleston roleplay #tom hiddleston imagine #tom hiddleston x reader #tom hiddleston smut #tom hiddleston au #tom hiddleston fanfic #tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston fluff

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nygmobblepot-trash · 2 years

Text

You all thought the Isabella plot line was hard to sit through? I'll show you true pain without throwing in some random bullshit just to stop the gay agenda or whatever.

If I wrote for the show I'd make you all suffer more. I know I've talked about this night many many times, but there's so many good options. So sorry if some stuff is from past posts. I enjoy tweeking scenarios over and over again.

Ok so here's how the so called "Oswald's confession dinner" would go down. After being asked to go to dinner Ed immediately knows what it is about. Ed may be terrible at paying attention to emotions but Oswald is incapable of feeling anything that isn't extreme. Yes we all love oblivious Ed but the man doesn't shut up about love and we know he loves mind games. He's been gaslighting Oswald ever since his first sentence to the man.

Anyways. Ed dressed up real nice and gets an expensive wine. He arrives at the dinner and Oswald is at a lost for words which is common when he around Ed. Unfortunately it is because of the mind games Ed plays whether it is stunning Oswald by saying something out of left field (Aka their first meeting) or just being intimidating. The second one is new but Ed does love how the game has changed. Both stokes his ego and that's the most important part. The thing that turns Ed on? Simple. Making the king of Gotham turn into a shaking mess in his presence. The fact he can do it when he's 'oblivious' is all the more fun. Ed watches Oswald struggle to get his confession out. He doesn't let Oswald find an easy way out.

Oswald tries to look away because he can't bare to say it while looking into Ed's eyes. Ed strides over, uses his hand to gently lift Oswald's chin up so Oswald is forced to look at him, "Mr. Cobblepot is something wrong? Why can't you look at me? You know I'll fix anything for you, right?" Ed swore he saw Oswald's soul leave his body. He didn't get to savor the reaction very long as Oswald bolted to the bathroom. Even over the water running Ed could hear Oswald losing it.

Now a nicer person would have stopped the game and let the serious shit happen. But as we all know Ed doesn't concede and frankly honey if you can't win the games you don't get to be with him. So Ed decides to be even more cruel. He knows Oswald is in there giving himself a pep talk. He'll pump himself up until he's a mess of emotions then he'll storm out of that bathroom on a mission. The second he sees Ed he'll yell it out and put it all on the table. And that's a problem for Ed. He isn't done being an asshole. In his opinion that's cheating and he can't have that. So Ed does the unspeakable, he takes off his suit jacket and slightly undoes his tie. To Ed this is very scandalous.

Then as if on que Oswald does as expected and busts out of the bathroom yelling. "OKAY ED. I'M READY. DON'T INTRUPT ME I HAVE TO DO THIS. ED I- ... why did you take your jacket off? Oh and your tie is... um."

Ed bites him bottom lip to stop from grinning. "The fire" he gestures to the fireplace behind him "it has made it awfully warm in here. I thought you were having the same issues as your face has been almost as red as that fire the entire night. I can put the jacket back on if it is making you uncomfortable. I guess I felt comfortable enough around you to relax a little.'

Oswald didn't pay attention to a word he said. Ed has never had even a hair out of place. Ed taking off his jacket and loosening his always very tight and perfect tie was very new. Hell Oswald was sure that Ed slept in a suit. He knew this was false as he had gone through Ed's stuff when he was living at his place but he couldn't actually picture Ed wearing any of it.

Ed savors Oswald self-destructing for a little bit before he decides to add more pressure. Ed gets up from his seat yet again. No timid Ed in sight. It is intimidation time aka stoic Ed. Edward Nygma strides up to Oswald who's brain is still melting and towers over him. Ed states back down at him with no readable emotion. Oswald is terrified and starts to back up until he unfortunately hits a wall. Ed does the move, you know the one, he puts his hands above Oswald's shoulders on the wall and slightly leans forward closing the already short distance between them. "You're acting strange Oswald."

"W-What are you talking about?"

"You brought me here to tell me something, something obviously very important, but all night you have failed to say it. The Oswald I know doesn't have this issue. Last time I checked the king of Gotham isn't afraid of anything. But I guess I was wrong." Ed wants to see how far he can go.

At first Oswald had the urge to grab Ed by his stupid tie and kiss him but as Ed's speech went on he wanted to punch him. But the asshole did have a point. He was Oswald fucking Cobblepot, king and mayor of Gotham. Why was this tall, skinny, nerd pressing his buttons? Who did this dark haired, intelligent, handsome, and apparently strong - hey wait! Oswald needed to focus but couldn't. Turns out Oswald doesn't like Ed when Oswald thinks he can easily crush him. Nope. Turns out Oswald enjoys whatever the fuck this is. Sure at first his fantasy was making Ed a blabbering mess as he shoved him into a closet to make out with him. No this was much better except Ed hadn't moved, or rather made a move. Not that Ed would, he doesn't know how Oswald feels right? He may be a genius but he's terrible at emotions right? It's not like he's been talking about love non stop. And now that he thinks about it Ed is wearing a brand new suit. Ed has cycled through the same 7 suits for ever since they met. Why the new one now? Speaking of the suit why did he take his jacket off? Oswald craned his head to face Ed's emotionless face. "Hey Ed. Why did you take your jacket off instead of turning off the fire? You thought I was hot too and that would be the most logical option."

It was quick but for a second Oswald saw panic in his eyes. "I wear a suit all the time. It was getting stuffy so I took off my jacket and loosened my tie. Why are you trying to avoid the issue here?" Ed said matter of factly.

Oswald smiled. "Because Edward Nygma, you're fucking with me."

"Am I?"

Oswald shoved Ed away and sighed, "Yes. You almost won too. You got too cocky, like always. You know why I asked you to be here and you decided to make me look like a fool. You hid your emotions pretty well but not good enough. Your actions and eyes betrayed you. You had no reason to undress like that and I could see the look in your eyes. It's the same look you give anyone lower than you when you're showing off."

Edward stared back dumbfounded. He never saw this coming.

"When I'm around you I'm not as confident as I usually am. You took advantage of that. I may not have enough courage to say what I want to say or even do what I want to do, but you're the same as me. At least when it comes to doing. You're all bark and no bite. Let's face it. You make me just as nervous as I make you, Ed. I win."

Suddenly Ed kicks back on. "Are you calling me a coward?"

Oswald pushed himself up to whipser to Ed "Kristen kissed you first, didn't she?" A wicked grin was plastered to his face.

Before Oswald or even Ed himself realized what was happening, Oswald was shoved hard back against the wall. They were in the same position they were in minutes ago. Ed's mind was racing and he breathed hard and fast. While Oswald held on to his. Then Ed did what Oswald thought was impossible and grabbed onto Oswald's tie and angrily pulled it as he brought his face to Oswald's.

As it turns out Ed is a good kisser... an impossiblely good kisser. Oswald doesn't know if it is due to Ed being pissed off or what. Oswald had even made a bet that Ed was a terrible kisser. This was the first time he was happy to lose money.

Unfortunately the only bad thing was the kiss didn't last long enough in Oswald's opinion. Which of course would be never. They had to breathe eventually. Turns out that was a new games as well. Both men tried their best not to be the first one to break. Oswald lost but he was holding his breath before the kiss so that isn't fair.

"I win." Ed said out of breath and let go of Oswald.

Oswald choked on his own laughter. "Are you kidding me?! If anyone won it was definitely me. I only said that shit so you'd do something and guess what, you did it!"

Oswald watched as Ed tried to compute that information. When he did his eyes went wide. "You manipulated me."

"You did it first to be fair, I just ended it. I always get what I want in the end, my dear Ed."

"Damn it. No matter what I do I play into your hands."

Don't say it Oswald. Don't say it.

...

Fuck it.

"What are you going to do about it? The great Riddler defeated by the Penguin."

Ed said nothing as he he grabbed Oswald by the wrist and almost ran up the steps to Oswald's room. Where they had a nice conversation and nothing else :)

#gotham #edward nygma #nygmobblepot #oswald cobblepot

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ink-on-the-brink · 3 years

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Hi I really love your writing!! Do you think you can write more for medic or sniper how they’d act in a relationship? I really like how you write them and I’d love to see more! (:

Ayo, my first ask! I'm glad you enjoyed my interpretation, it's good to know my stuff's entertaining! Anyway here's some quick headcannons for them in a relationship ^-^

Medic

Now Medic isn't really the type of person to get into relationships much. He's often too busy with work for such things. However, that doesn't mean he's immune to the love bug.

Chances are if you're dating him it's because you two work together or have the same fascination with the human body. It's practically a deal-breaker for him if you're squeamish. He loves his work, so if you don't also find at least a little interest in it he's most likely not going to see you in a romantic light.

When he does end up in a relationship though you can bet your entire ass that it's all but conventional. It's either a Bonnie and Clyde situation or he manages to find someone who dulls down his more psychopathic tendencies. Either way each day with him is sure to be one hell of a trip, for better or worse.

Despite his apparent love for gore and mutilation, he can be somewhat of a lovesick puppy once he's far enough into a relationship. Often seeking the attention of his lover, despite his denials of doing such a thing.

This man has three modes, blood-covered psychopath, professional doctor, and absolute dork. The changes between the three depend entirely on who he's with and what he's doing. You most often than not will see his more dorky side. His cute ramblings and wide smiles as he's around you. The other two are mostly saved for his work. So depending on how involved you are in the actual gravel war you might end up not even knowing how terrifyingly creepy he can be.

His love language is time well spent. Gifts are nice sure, and he would never deny the comfort of hugs and kisses, but he's more into spending time with his lover. He loves the long conversations late at night and the comedy of inside jokes more than anything else.

Despite this, getting him away from his work to spend time on something else is a rather hard task. He's often so enamored and intrigued with whatever he's working on that he doesn't really want to do much else besides that.

That is when you learn that the only thing this medical man loves more than experimentation is some high-quality dark chocolate. One glimpse at the sweet treat and he's hooked.

You might just wanna ignore the fact that you are literally using treats to lure a grown man from his room and just focus on the fact that it's working

PDA isn't exactly something he cares about, nor does he really think about it. He's not going to get more or less touchy in front of people and he has absolutely no problem with you showing your affection in front of others.

Him? Jealous? Oh don't make him laugh! He'd sooner put Scouts head in his fridge than feel jealousy! (He saids as he's in the process of tearing the guts out of the person who dared to wink at you)

If you are up for it he will 10000% involve you in his experiments. He'll make sure not to do anything too extreme but small things couldn't hurt, right?

Overall excitable and sweet...in the 'I can't give you my heart because I kinda need it to live but would a stranger's heart be an okay replacement?' Kinda way.

Sniper

Okay look, man's super insecure. It might not be noticeable, and he sure as hell won't tell you, but he often doesn't feel right loving himself, let alone loving someone else. He's maybe been in like one romantic relationship. And it probably ended because he was too nervous to say much and put on a stoic face of silence that bored whoever he was dating.

You wanna date this man? You best go buy a pickaxe with how many walls you're going to have to get through first. You'd have to be a very close friend before he even considered anything more.

If you manage to meet that requirement though and he actually ends up catching feelings it can become pretty obvious. The one cool, calm and collected exterior he used didn't work once you knew him well enough and it only became more clear with his mumbled sentences and averted eyes that something was up.

Once he manages to land himself in a relationship though, whether that be by a few accidentally spoken words or you managing to push an answer out of him, it can become rather evident why he didn't want to tell you in the first place.

It's time to bust out the pickaxe again because it looks like you're going to have a few more walls to break through.

At the start of the relationship he's completely silent. It's rare to hear more than a few words from him. It'll take a lot of patience and time to make him comfortable and help him understand that there's no reason to be that way around you.

He isn't a very needy lover. He doesn't expect (or want) to spend every waking moment together. He likes his time alone and he will always respect yours. He's not a very big fan of overly clingy people, it overwhelms him.

You get to see a very different side of Sniper than really anyone else has seen, besides his parents that is. To others he's calculated. He's efficient, polite, and has a plan to kill anyone he meets. You, on the other hand, get to see the outcomes of someone who doesn't tend to express their emotions well. You see the breakdown after each fight he gets involved in and the almost obsession he has with each negative comment thrown his way. He'll act stoic in the moment, maybe throw back an insult or two, but you know he cares a lot for what everyone thinks of him.

Surprisingly his love language is touch. Now it is going to take a long time to get to this point, but once you do it's possibly one of the best parts of your relationship. He loves to hold you and be held by you, to intertwine your fingers with his, to bombard you with sweet kisses all over your face as you squirm beneath him. He SUPER touch-starved and really just wants a hug whenever he sees you.

PDA is a HUGE nope from him. Under no circumstances does he want to do anything in front of anyone. He was comfortable with you and you alone and would probably melt into a puddle of embarrassment if any of the people around you tried to force you two to kiss or hold hands. Luckily for him, most people probably wouldn't even be able to tell the two of you were in a relationship with how much he enforces that rule.

He has two modes when jealous. Fury and silent turmoil. Mode one is when someone advances on you and you want absolutely nothing to do with it or if they end up touching you. He'll most likely tell them to piss off and if they don't he isn't averse to beating a bitch.

Mode two however is the one you have to really worry about. It happens when he notices or perceives someone as flirting with you and you either don't notice it or brush it off as a joke. He kinda always has the fear that you'll leave him for someone better so it certainly doesn't help if he sees someone flirting and you seem okay with it.

He loves sharing hobbies with you and will be absolutely elated if you're more of an outdoorsy person. You two will take vacations all over the world to the most remote places just exploring and camping. It's one of his favorite things to do with you. The two of you will often spend weeks with only each other and if only for a while he can pretend you and him are the only people that exist. For him, that's about as comforting as it gets.

Overall he's a secret mess of a man in great need of someone despite what you may initially think. He's the epitome of 'don't touch me but also I need a hug' and 'people don't mean shit but also please don't leave"

#reader x tf2 #tf2 #tf2 x reader #medic #sniper #tf2 sniper #tf2 medic

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sagefzy · 3 years

Text

PART ELEVEN: THE PERFORMANCE

perfectionism | prev | next

After sitting down for about ten minutes, Atsumu redirected his attention to the now dimming lights. The once lit up auditorium was now only being illuminated from the light appearing on the stage. There was almost an entrancing aura in the room, everyone gathered in the same room for the sole purpose of watching people showcase their musical talent. Though completely different activities, he couldn't help but be reminded of the similar feeling when watching a volleyball match.

Although Suna had mentioned to him many times that he and you had two very distinct and different personalities, he couldn't help but disagree. From the little he'd observed, you both had strong passions that you had dedicated your whole lives to. Even though you two may approach situations differently. You both have a mutual understanding of the thrill that comes with pushing yourself to the limit for something.

He had never really chosen to get to know another person on a deeper level. Of course, there was Osamu, but that didn't really count since that was his brother. Additionally, his friendship with Suna was only a byproduct of Osamu's friendship with him. Atsumu constantly had girls throwing themselves at him, and even though he enjoyed basking in their attention, he knew that they were only in love with the idea of him.

Outside of volleyball and his family, he never got the chance to have a close relationship with someone, but that was something he was willing to sacrifice for the sake of achieving his dreams. Not to mention, he always had the lingering fear that, in the end, people only hung out with him to get close to Osamu. He really hoped that you were an exception to that case.

The competition had to at least been going on for an hour now, Atsumu thought to himself. When he imagined attending a piano competition, he envisioned a relaxing show that he could attend for free, but that wasn't the case. Instead, he spent his time watching musicians attempt to play grand, complex pieces to perfection, but at most they only achieved mediocre performances. Just how long was it going to take for you to come on stage?

"Now presenting contestant 105, l/n y/n. Playing piano concerto number one in E minor, opus eleven: two. Romance larghetto."

His eyes were directed to your figure that now walked onto the stage. Your head held high, your footing confident. Atsumu grinned, noticing that you were sporting that perfect smile of yours. He watched as you took a deep breath while fixing your stool.

Before your hands touched the keys, he observed how, for a quick second, your eyes changed from confident to anxious when studying the crowd. Your eyes were glued in the same spot briefly, however they were quickly averted back to the instrument. Could it be that large crowds made you anxious? No, it couldn't be, you seemed way too confident walking out on stage. He wondered just what made you apprehensive.

He continued to watch you intently.

Your fingers graced the keys. They quickly found their tempo and danced to the rhythm. You didn't miss a single beat nor note as you played. Everything was played to perfection, just as it always was.

Your smile disappeared, only to be replaced with a face of precision and focus. Your hands produced a soft melody, making the sound glide into his ears. No previous performer enchanted the audience like you did. The notes danced and swayed in the air.

Your song had so much power to it. It was as if a mystical spell was casted in the room the minute that you started to play. Atsumu's eyes widened as he watched you get lost in the song. There was absolutely no hesitation as you played. Your body was completely in tune with the instrument.

Although you weren't saying anything, you were telling a story to everyone in the room, captivating them. It was all perfect. Your rhythm, notes, tempo, and tone- it was exactly as written on paper. You quite literally were playing the piece perfectly. However, the story you were telling with your music, wasn't quite your own, but rather the composer.

You were guaranteed a first place win since you were playing a technical piece perfectly, but it lacked the emotion. You played it exactly as the composer intended, nothing more, nothing less.

Atsumu recognized the seemingly stoic look on your face. It wasn't something he could decipher easily at first, but now hearing you play, he could understand it. You were so obsessed, so intent with playing it perfectly, something he often found himself partaking in when in an important match. You were perfect, but at what cost?

There was no denying that you were extremely talented, certainly more talented than himself, he thought. But, he could only imagine how much more captivating you could be when expressing your own emotions with your talent.

As your song neared its end, the whole room stood up in applause. You stood up, knowing you played it perfectly, but you still felt empty. You remember a time where you used to love savoring the gratification from an overwhelmed audience. Now, however, you stood in front of everyone clapping for your perfect performance, and you couldn't feel less accomplished. Perhaps you were being too hard on yourself. When did playing piano turn into a chore?

You glanced to the top of the audience, the same place you were looking before the performance, and locked eyes with your dad. The same unreadable expression was present on his face. He shook his head and walked out the exit door. Your chest grew heavy, trying its best to hold in your tears in front of the audience.

You bowed in front of the audience, trying your best to conceal the emotions running rampant in you. You swiftly paced yourself offstage, running past your mentor who was there for support and into the backstage bathroom.

Your back leaned on the heavy door, all of your bottled feelings washing out. You looked at your face in the mirror, placing two hands over your heated cheeks. Your eyes started to sting, but you still stared into the reflection. Anger, disappointment, humiliation, vulnerability, and most of all, loneliness. You let it all spill out at that moment.

There was so much more you wanted to do with your music, but at that moment no amount of praise could convince you that it was worth it. All in life you ever wanted to do was make your dad proud, show him that you are worthy enough to be your mother's daughter. Was anything you did ever going to be good enough for him?

"y/n, it's Haruka-sensei." A voice from the door knocked. "I thought you played the piece perfectly, I'll be in the lobby, so come out when you're ready."

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. Your hands made their way to your face again, this time cleaning up the tears and smudged mascara. Looking up one last time, you smiled into the mirror. Over the years, you convinced yourself that if you faked being happy enough, eventually you will be. It's not like anyone could tell the difference from it anyways.

You opened the door slowly, trying to gain your composure again. You bumped into many kids roaming the halls backstage looking anxious to perform. The maze of people was something you were now used to navigating.

The lobby was empty with the exception of your sensei and dad, everyone else still in the auditorium watching the final stretch of the performances. Haruka-sensei and your dad didn't get along for the most part, which is why you weren't surprised when you saw them standing in completely opposite areas of the room.

Your dad was first to approach you. "What did you think that was?" His voice was laced with alcohol. Your gaze met his. His eyes filled with resentful judgement. "You think you can get away playing like shit and make your way to the top?"

Droplets of tears fell to the ground once more. "I asked you a question!"

You looked to the ground. "No, I know I'll never be good enough." You sniffed harshly, still trying to maintain your composure, but failing. You hated crying in front of your dad. It was arguably the worst feeling in the world, like you were being isolated in a dark void with nothing but disappointment.

He watched you cry. You could feel his gaze burning into the top of your head, which still faced the ground in fear. All of a sudden, you felt a harsh grip on your wrist that was sure to leave a bruise.

"And don't you ever forget that," He spat. "I bet your mother is even more repulsed by you than I am. It's a joke that you think you'll ever be anything great." He shook your arm firmly, forcing you to see the aggravation displayed on his expression.

"That's enough," Haruka yelled, shoving your dad to the side. She might've been a small lady, but she sure did know how to stand her ground. "I can't stand hearing you spread such bullshit hatred to your own daughter. You make me sick. Why don't you go and get yourself even more drunk. Maybe you'll wake up and find yourself passed out on a park bench."

He rolled his eyes and scoffed. He left the building, leaving just you and Haruka.

"Listen, y/n, I think you played beautifully. Your technique was perfect, and with just a few tweaks here and there, I'm sure you'll be more than ready to take the top spot at nationals." She praised. She gave you a genuine smile and pulled you into a hug.

Feeling overwhelmed, you started to cry for the third time that hour. "Shh- don't worry about your dad, he's just a loser-asshole that projects all his issues onto you." You felt comforted by her embrace. Although she'd only known you for about a month now, Haruka had quickly become one of your favorite piano mentors. She had the loving presence and embrace of a mother, something that was so foreign to you at first.

After your heavy tears and emotions subsided, you re-entered the backstage hallways. You sat in the corner of the hallway, directing your attention to a boy- who couldn't have been any older than twelve. He sat next to his mom, holding her hand as he kept on muttering about his nervousness.

You watched as the mom eased his nerves with a single statement. "My child, I love you now, and I'll still love you after you go out and perform." The words warmed your heart. The affection from a mother was a distant memory in your mind. You could never recall a moment you were sad around your mother. Why did she have to leave so soon?

Before the kid could respond, he was called out to perform. He hugged his mom quickly and scrambled to the stage. You sat there lost in your thoughts, imagining what life would be like if your mother didn't pass away so early on.

You sighed. There was no use in fantasizing about a false reality even if it brought you temporary peace from your discomfort. What only mattered now was the present moment.

You noticed that the boy was back, a giant grin plastered on his face as he met up with his mother, it'd only be a few minutes until the winners were announced. Soon enough, all of the competitors were asked to reconvene at the stage.

You looked out at the audience again, but this time it was different. Rather than feeling anxious when meeting the gaze of someone, you felt content. Atsumu flashed his famous smirk and displayed a thumbs up, only to be quickly smacked down by Osamu. The two seemed to get into an argument after that, making you look at Suna who was now a giggling mess. The whole event made you laugh, momentarily forgetting about the heavy reign of disappointment on your shoulder.

However, the three of them got their act together once the top three standings were being announced. This part always made you fidgety. The uncertainty of the outcome always twisted your stomach in knots. Once second and third place were announced you took a deep breath, hoping that you were to be crowned first.

"And-" Here it was, you thought. The moment that decided whether or not you'd go to nationals. "-first place for the Hyogo Regional piano competition goes to-" You could feel your heart beating out of your chest. Your nails dug into your arm, the tension eating away at you. "-l/n y/n."

You almost jumped to the front of the stage when they announced your name. You did it, despite what your dad said, you did it. And it didn't matter what hateful words of disappointment he spat at you because in that very moment, you were enough.

Atsumu watched as you were handed a certificate. A radiant smile now present on your face. This smile was different, though. The one he was used to seeing was the seemingly perfect one, the one so perfect it was almost fake. The one you wore right now was one of genuine, heartfelt joy. Was this the real you? Just what else were you hiding under that perfect smile?

Osamu tapped his shoulder. "Stop staring at yer little girlfriend and let's go to the lobby before it gets too crowded. Suna said we're going to go out for udon."

"Yeah, yeah 'm coming," He muttered, never once taking his eyes off of your smile.

fun facts !

Osamu and Atsumu are notorious for always being late for everything, whether it be 10 minutes to an hour.

Atsumu daydreams when he's bored, only paying attention to what he wants to.

Every time Osamu cooks, he always puts on music in the background and it always differs depending on his mood.

perfectionism ©

smau written by @sagefzy

taglist: open just send an ask :)

@shephard17895 @art-junkie-13 @vhsryuu @qualitygiantshoepsychic @everytimeswift @kritiiiii @why-couldnt-it-be @sunahyejin @jbsonelesslonleygirl @tanakasimpcorner @iwasunshine @succulentmom @ashy-lyn @bakudummy @rinsangel @kachuuha @sakusasimpbot

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nikakistos · 3 years

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Mikasa will kill Eren

With the series ending in only three chapters at the time of writing this meta/prediction post, i want to share my thoughts about how the battle between the Alliance and Eren will conclude. More specifically, i will analyze all the reasons that make me believe that Mikasa will kill Eren and put an end to this battle.

Mikasa’s character arc

The first important reason that made me reach to that conclusion is non other than Mikasa’s phenomenal and, in my opinion, underrated character arc. So, let’s get to know Mikasa.

Mikasa starts the story as a sheltered kid. She lives in the mountains, far away from any other kids, with her mom and dad being her only company. Her mom and dad were her entire world. She was a naive, innocent little girl who used to overlook the cruel nature of the world, focusing entirely on it’s beauty. She was content living like that with the people she loved the most, without having any grandiose dreams of her own.

And then, reality ensues. Three human traffickers kill her family and try to sell her as a sex slave. Mikasa, being only a child and alone was about to surrender. Without her family she didn’t have a place in the world. She didn’t know how to live without them.

Until Eren comes to save her. Out of the blue he kills the first two of the traffickers and unties her. However, the third one appears and disarms Eren. Before blacking out, the young boy tells Mikasa the words that later became her mantra “Fight! If you don’t win, you die. If you win, you live. If you can’t fight, you can’t win!”

That is the moment that Mikasa’s survival instincts awaken her Ackerman powers. The moment that she accepts that this world is kill or be killed and realizes it’s true nature. And the moment she learns the truth of the world she finds the strngth to kill her assailant. Mikasa kills so that she won’t be killed. And the moment her enemy falls, the old Mikasa dies.

Broken and homeless, Mikasa asks Dr.Yeager what she should do now that she had no one. How could she live on her own? She never learned how to do that. Mikasa, from the very beginning of her life, is a codependent person. She thinks that she can’t go on alone. And at this moment of sadness comes Eren and wraps a muffler around her neck to protect her from the cold. Both from the physical cold, but also from the cold, hard world that took her happiness away. He offers her a home. Their home.

From that moment onwards Eren became Mikasa’s world. He replaced her parents as her new family, alongside with his mom and dad. Mikasa, realizing that Eren was no more than a troublesome kid with a knack for getting into troubles, decides to be by his side forever and protect him. Partly out of gratitude for saving her and giving her a home, parly because it was his mom’s wish, partly because she is in love with him, but also in order to protect herself and her own peace of mind Mikasa latches onto Eren. And she makes the same mistake as before. She starts viewing Eren as a wholly good person. She keeps the image of the scarf and forgets the violence that came before. She projects onto Eren all of the beauty in the world.

After Carla’s death, Mikasa’s overprotective attitude only worsens. She resolves to follow Eren at all times and be there for him, without considering his feelings. She actually had a habit of misinterpreting his sentiments about her clingy nature quite often. Whoever threatens her life with Eren becomes an enemy. So, Mikasa, who never got over her trauma, thinks that Eren is the most important part of the world and that without him she can’t go own. To that end she joins the military, when in reality she never cared about humanity’s struggle against the titans. Mikasa was fine living an uneventful life with Eren and Armin.

However, those sentiments are not fit for a soldier. As a person who dedicated her heart for humanity’s survival, her first priority being Eren becomes a hindrance. A soldier should always put his feelings second. Fulfilling the mission should always be first. While Mikasa proves herself to be extremely effective in the Battle of Trost initially, with her stoic and direct nature saving hundreds of lives, when news of Eren’s death reach her she breaks down completely. She convinces the rest of the cadets to fight, while not being prepared to do her duty. She gives up and she is ready to die, until Eren’s memory and her desire to not forget him help her pull through and fight for her life. This marks the first instance of Mikasa’s growing maturity. She finds a reason to keep moving forward even without her family.

Mikasa is a survivor. Keep carrying on and living even after the deaths of her beloved people has always been a part of her. And this is not something that comes directly from Eren, but from her own self and love of life. Her Ackerman powers only activated due to her own survival instincts. Not from Eren’s orders. While she hasn’t realized it yet, Mikasa takes pride in being alive. In a world where only the strong survive, she feels proud of counting herself amongst them.

Of course, the revelation of Eren being alive makes Mikasa regress. She continues with her overprotective behavior and with her reckless, emotional behavior. Her desire to exact vengeance on Annie causes her to jeopardize the mission to retrieve Eren and sideline Levi. Mikasa was hurt by Annie, becaue Annie exposed her again. She showed her that she is not entirely capable of protecting Eren. She also showed her once more that fighting impulsively and allowing feelings to interfere when in a mission puts her life at risk. The first time, she was saved by Eren. The second, by Levi. So, Mikasa resolves to do better next time. She resolves to become a better soldier. Her sense of responsibility over Levi’s injury pains her and she tries to make up for it. She scolds Eren for not fighting her, despite her having killed numerous Survey Corps members. Her effots pay off and this eventually leads to Annie getting captured.

Unfortunately, Mikasa’s feelings have continued to resurface in critical moments. And those feelings did not concern Eren entirely. Despite Mikasa claiming that she only cares about a small amount of lives, specifically Armin and Eren, perhaps she hadn’t realize that she cares for far more people than she initially believed. Even after promising Levi to not make any more blunders, the only reason that Reiner and Bertholt escaped from her was the bonds she had created with them. She saw them as her comradres. She later tries to make up for her failure by trying to make the rest of her comrades see Reiner and Bertholt as enemies of humanity and prevent them from hesitating like she did and putting a tough front against Ymir, but again, the damage had already been done.

Mikasa had grown to care for more people than Eren and Armin. Mikasa during the Battle of Trost threatened Dimo Reeves who was delaying the evacuation process, because he was getting more of her comrades killed. She saved innocents and civilians. She was angry at the Female Titan for killing so many of her comrades. She created strong bonds within the 104th unit. She even showed consideration for Levi, even though she disliked him for beating up Eren. More importantly, as the series progress, Mikasa starts caring more about the world in general. The little girl who only cared about herself and her family members has now become a soldier who fights for the entire world. She even develops a sense of belonging to Paradis, viewing it as her homeland, when she wasn’t even willing to fight for the island 4 years ago. Her cold exterior starts to crumble and she opens up. She protects a child who killed one of her best friends, a stark contrast to the earlier version of Mikasa who nearly ruined a mission by trying to have her vengeance against Annie. The Mikasa who simply cared for her small world and had no ambitions of exploring the outside world easily embraces the volunteers from Marley and becomes optimistic about their intergration to Paradis. The exact opposite of Eren.

This gradual “defrosting” of Mikasa and her repeated failures, along with the realization of the inferiority feelings she was causing him to have, force Mikasa to alter her treatment of Eren. While she was constantly nagging and smothering him, she starts to become more supportive of him, encouraging him and helping him believe in himself, just like she did with Armin. Not only that, this enables her to become a better soldier as well. While the Mikasa of the first few chapters was willing to disobey orders if that meant being close to Eren, she starts trusting the leadership of Levi, whom she resented, and entrusts Eren to Armin in the Battle of Shiganshina. She understands that she has a role to play as a soldier and that Eren can take care of himself either alone or with the help of other people, without her being near. This results in a huge victory in Shiganshina.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that she has changed completely. Mikasa still refused to obey Levi’s orders and attacked him when he tried to revive Erwin instead of Armin, Despite all, her feelings for the people who are closer to her, Eren and Armin are still too strong sometimes and overpower her better judgement. However, it was at this point exactly, that Mikasa received her second warning. She has to keep moving forward with the knowledge that all the people she knows will eventually die. And she did. Mikasa did give up in the end during the Serumbowl. She has matured.

Unfortunately, Mikasa’s love for Eren is still hindering her. Even now, after all that, Mikasa’s sole dream is living with him forever. She is in love with him, even though he has commited horrible crimes that go against her values. Her introverted, shy nature plus her fear of losing him do not allow her to express her true feelings, but she does have them.

And here comes Mikasa’s greatest flaw. Despite all of her development, she still thinks that without Eren she is lost. She has no goal left. She never learned how to live as an individual and as an independent person. That’s why she believes his lies so easily. She doesn’t recognize her sense of self without him. She still ties her identity to Eren. She has all of the foundations for living as a complete and healthy human being, but her inability to separate herself from Eren is destroying her and clouding her judgement. That’s why she asks Armin what to do in chapter 125, that’s why she tries to stop Pieck from killing Eren in chapter 135, that’s why she says she won’t kill him. And most importantly for her, that’s why she couldn’t admit that she is in love with him in chapter 123. Mikasa simply cannot handle rejection from Eren. She can’t think of a future for her without him by her side. She almost reconsiles herself to loving him from afar.

It is very evident and telling from her reaction to Louise and her first talk to Annie that Mikasa is actually ashamed for prioritizing Eren over anything else and simply following his footsteps. In reality, Mikasa doesn’t want that. She wants to be her own person. She wants to be Eren’s equal, not his follower. That’s why she doesn’t wear the scarf anymore.

Well all these need to and will change. Mikasa has to put her feelings aside one more time and act as a soldier and finish off the threat to humanity. She needs to stop tying so much of herself to Eren and realize for good that she can live without him, despite wanting to be by his side forever. And in order to do all that, she has to stop lying to herself for good. She has to admit her feelings, her true feelings not solely to her, but to him as well. And judging by her own regrets, she will.

Mikasa’s character arc has her going from a happy, naive little girl, to a broken, gloomy, stoic person who only cares about a couple of people to a proper soldier who cares and fights for the entire world, friends and foes included. She opens up, makes friendships, develops a more pacifistic worldview compared to her survival mindset of old. But most importantly, she will become a normal, functioning human being.

Nature of the conflict

Moving on from Mikasa’s characters arc, i believe that the nature of the conflict of the series in and of itself points out towars Mikasa killing Eren. The first and primary conflict in the series is the fight between Humans and Titans. The world has expanded since the first chapter. The series has become more complex. And yet, in the final battle we see some people fighting to protect humanity from the hordes of titans that want to trample the remaining human race outside the walls of Paradis.

In this exact setting we have the Survey Corps, the group of people that from day one fights for humanity’s survival and liberation from the terror of the titans fughting against the biggest symbol of oppression and enslavement in the entire series. The Wall Titans.

The Scouts dreamt of an idealized world when fighting against the titans. And still, even after this world was revealed to be quiet different than they imagined, more disappointing, they still don’t give up. Because they understand that the world is a cruel place, but it also very beautiful. The person who best represents this theme in the series is none other than Mikasa Ackerman. And she is fighting for the Scouting Legion against the person who showed her both sides of the world in the same day. That person has renounced all the beauty in this world and focused only on the ugly side. And he fights for the Titans.

In a series about humans fighting against titans, Mikasa is a character associated with human strength.

While Mikasa (and the Survey Corps in general) is associated with human strength, Eren on the other hand has been constantly referred to as a monster. A devil. Something inhuman. Now of course, technically speaking Mikasa is also part titan and Eren is also part human, however this symbolism still exists.

Judging by the narrative and the themes of the series, an Eren victory is downright impossible. It just doesn’t fit for the titans to defeat humanity. The story has put so much emphasis on the creation of a better world, free of curses and hate. Eren, being the physical manifestation of both can’t win. He has to die. And in such a story, is there a better way to topple the biggest titan of all time, using the trademark weapon of humanity? That it the ODMG.

Foreshadowing

In this part, i will let the pictures do the talking. It is evident from all of them and from my previous analysis of Mikasa’s arc that a full blown conflict between her and Eren is bound to happen. And Mikasa killing Eren has been referenced way too many times for that to be a coincidence.

Every single time in this latest arc that Eren being killed is mentioned, Mikasa is at the forefront. Isayama focuses on her too much in these scenes. Considering the fact that now that Gabi has realized what the true nature of the titans is, the fact that they have wrapped the explosives around Eren’s neck, Armin going Colossal being foreshadowed over a billion times, Eren seems to be in huge danger. Killing the Source of the Titans would likely kill Eren, seeing as how he is nothing but a head without a body. And it doesn’t look like he can regenerate. Stopping the Colossals might only be possible by killing the centipede that is tied to Eren’s survival. And for all the reasons i have mentioned, i believe that Mikasa will be the one to kill it.

#snk #aot #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #mikasa #mikasa ackerman #eren #eren yeager #eremika #snk meta #aot meta #attack on titan final season #attack on titan season 4 #character analysis #character development #snk spoilers #attack on titan manga #attack on titan predictions #shingeki no kyojin analysis

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shihalyfie · 3 years

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An analysis of Iori and his character arc

Iori has a particularly interesting position in 02′s narrative (and, even more widely so, in perhaps all of both Adventure and 02) in that his base profile is rather unusual-looking even from the get-go -- the youngest child in both groups, yet with a (seemingly) mature demeanor that surpasses even his seniors. On top of that, Iori ends up having a very deep relation to 02′s themes and plot itself in a way that isn’t initially apparent, but actually makes him a very vital centerpiece of 02′s story.

Before we get into Iori’s role in 02′s actual plot, it needs to be established that a very, very large amount of Iori’s character is heavily shaped by his family background and upbringing. Prior to the start of the series, the Hida family had a large void in it, with Iori’s father Hiroki having been killed in the line of duty. Being a mere five-year-old child who had lost his father barely into actually being sentient and basically had to live the following three years going off hearsay on what he was actually like, Iori ends up raised by his mother Fumiko and his paternal grandfather Chikara.

While not in exactly the same way as the Takenouchi family (which is literally working in cultural preservation and study), the Hida family is very traditionalist Japanese -- Fumiko makes traditional Japanese food and snacks like kanpyoumaki and ohagi, and a lot of attention is given to the butsudan altar in their house where they honor the late Hiroki (also note the tatami flooring). That, combined with Chikara’s naturally strict personality, led to Iori being raised with “very strict manners”, and by a set of very firm guidelines on honor, respect, and the like.

Having been raised into this kind of formality, Iori speaks almost exclusively in polite-form Japanese. This happens to initially make him come off a bit like Koushirou -- likely a deliberate parallel, given the Knowledge connection between the two (being the kind of person who admits that you don’t know everything and wants to know more requires a bit of humility, after all). That said, Iori’s way of doing this has some key differences from Koushirou:

Unlike Koushirou, who was largely polite out of an attempt to keep distance from everyone and thus had a streak of being somewhat non-confrontational, Iori is perfectly willing to say harsh or critical things -- in other words, his way of speaking is formal, but it’s not necessarily polite, and in fact Iori is probably the single most passive-aggressive person in this cast. He has absolutely no qualms about dunking on whatever he feels truly deserves the dunking, and he’ll certainly do it with a lot of grace, but he is very capable of being extremely cold when he wants to be.

Koushirou stuck to formality out of detachment and intimidation, to the point that, as per Adventure episodes 38 and 54, he was compulsively unable to bring himself to speak casually unless he forced himself. Iori, on the other hand, often “slips” -- on top of willingly defaulting to casual form whenever he’s talking to himself or (occasionally) to the Digimon (who are outside Japanese levels of propriety), he also has a tendency to start using casual form whenever he gets particularly emotionally compromised. (While it doesn’t quite come off in the translation, the above screenshots from 02 episode 10 are an example of this, with Iori losing his temper at the Kaiser and slipping into casual form -- and a bit of fun foreshadowing, guess who’s the one to successfully calm him down? Takeru. Remember this for later.) In other words, Iori’s formality is not compulsive, but a conscious thing he tries to maintain as he holds himself to high standards, and is unable to completely uphold during times his emotions get the better of him.

Ultimately, Iori may come off as “mature and composed”, but he’s still an impressionable nine-year-old child, who’s effectively parroting the rules his grandfather instilled in him because he sees it as The One and Only Guide to Living Life. In trying to figure out the right thing to do in any situation, Iori ends up constantly trying to fall back on “this is the right way to do things!” and taking it rather badly whenever things start falling outside of the expected pattern. Despite being the one responsible for Iori’s tightly principled life to begin with, even Chikara himself comments that Iori’s not being flexible enough in his thinking in 02 episode 5 -- because it’s not like he’s expecting Iori to be like this, but Iori is simply having a hard time applying these principles practically when he’s working with the limited range of being a nine-year-old child.

And as much as it may be tempting to see Iori as stoic, watching his expressions and way of emoting throughout the series, he does very much have the full range of emotions and curiosity and even cheer of a nine-year-old child -- it’s that he’s just constantly holding himself back for the sake of being principled and well-mannered. This has the unfortunate side effect that Iori is, as the Animation Chronicle calls it, “clumsy at expressing himself as a child”. Because he’s constantly restraining himself like this, he has a hard time expressing himself or letting himself enjoy things in the way a normal child would.

It also goes a long way in explaining why Iori is never seen hanging out with any other peers his age, and is exclusively depicted in the company of either the rest of the 02 group, or his own family. While part of it is simply because (as per Japanese school procedure) he’s too young to be formally enrolled in any clubs, 02 episode 3 goes out of its way to show Iori being left alone in the classroom with only a teacher stuck supervising him, as he tries to force himself to finish his lunch due to his stubborn adherence to principle (even though he seems to hate tomatoes). In other words, it’s heavily implied that Iori’s own behavior ended up isolating him from his peers. Considering that the 02 group is generally made up of kids who are socially displaced in some way, it naturally follows that, despite being significantly older than him, they end up welcoming him into their friend circle and treating him as an equal.

When the series starts, Miyako and Iori seem to have gotten a certain degree of closeness (with Iori as one of the only people Miyako drops honorifics on). It stands to reason that Miyako, being open-minded towards people and rather aggressively friendly, would be willing to befriend her neighbor despite the three-year age gap between them, and so they already seem to have developed a rapport where Miyako’s willing to come over to his place to help work on the Hida family electronics in exchange for food.

So, you know, this and that happens, Iori becomes a Chosen Child, and this is the start of where Iori’s “principles” start coming into conflict with each other. The nature of the Digital World crisis is a no-brainer -- the Kaiser is doing terrible things, and Iori’s just been given the tools to do something about it, and so for him, upholding his principles to do the right thing means proactively doing something about it. But getting involved in this territory war will mean “fighting and hurting other people” (bad) and “hiding things from his family and sacrificing obligations to them” (also bad). Chikara advises him in 02 episode 5 that he still needs to be the one to decide what he wants and needs to do at any given moment, but it’s clear that this is still a new concept for Iori to swallow.

It’s also important that 02 episode 5 is also the episode that introduces Jou, who very much understood the dissonance between “adhering to principles in spite of how practical that may not actually be”, which means the two of them end up bonding over...ditching real-life obligations to come to the Digital World. This bonding happens despite the fact that they have the largest age gap out of any two given kids out of the Adventure and 02 group (Jou is 15, and Iori 9) -- and yet, they’re able to bond over being like-minded like this. And while they come from different contexts, there’s also a parallel drawn between the two on “the importance of personal choice” -- because back in Adventure, Jou’s story involved channeling his desire to help others in a way different from his usual expected path as a doctor or as a Chosen Child, and, likewise, it will be up to Iori to find his own way towards what he thinks is right.

Iori’s “adherence to principles” also needs to be distinguished from Jou’s in that Jou was someone more likely to be stuck to “practical” rules (one might call him Lawful) such as waiting for adults to help them with things, or what to put on eggs. Iori, on the other hand, has self-enforced rules that are far more ideological -- he doesn’t actually care that much about institutionally-enforced rules (note how he has absolutely no issue with sneaking into school with his friends in 02 episode 6) as much as he enforces a moral code on himself about “the right thing to do”. For instance, that he has to show his respect to Jou by formally finishing his introduction, even if it’s clear they know each other by now already.

But, again, it bears repeating: Iori is a nine-year-old child. The rest of the kids respect him enough to not treat him like a younger child -- other than a brief moment of emotional compromise that Daisuke quickly apologized for, the group is never really depicted as paying particular mind or care to the fact that Iori is so much younger than them, and for the most part treat him like an equal. But Iori himself is conscious of this -- after all, it’s why he’s constantly speaking politely to everyone all of the time, but 02 episode 16 also implies he’s very self-conscious about this. The plot of the episode kicks off when Iori momentarily gets caught up in his excitement about potentially getting a new Digimental, and, once things start going south, he starts blaming himself for causing all of this and lashing out at the others for (at least, in his mind) singling him out to be the one to escape on the grounds of being the youngest. After all is said and done with the incident, Submarimon lets Iori have a moment of something Iori really does need: a bit of a chance to actually get to enjoy himself as a young child instead of restraining himself so much.

Speaking of 02 episode 16, this is also where we first get to see how the pressure of maintaining Iori’s moral code starts to emotionally tear at him. It’s the first time we see Iori lose his composure this much. To everyone else here (and, perhaps, the audience, to some degree), Iori’s making a mountain out of a molehill -- he’s calling himself an unworthy person for telling a lie that even Jou himself clearly didn’t mind. But remember, Iori is someone who’s still learning a lot about how the world works at such a young age and is inclined by default to fall back on whatever his grandfather’s told him (to a point that even said grandfather considers to be overdoing it). Right now, Iori has basically built his entire view of morality based on this kind of thing, so putting a dent on it is like encouraging a slippery slope of potentially falling into moral depravity.

The reason why I say Iori’s character arc has a lot to do with Adventure and 02’s storytelling itself is that it’s a surprisingly pragmatic series when it comes down to it -- “it’s okay to lie, sometimes” is not exactly the kind of moral you’d expect out of your average kids’ show, but, perhaps a bit unusually, this series prefers to skip all of the preachiness and focus on pragmatics. (After all, back in Adventure, a lot of the final arc revolved around the question of “is fighting the right thing to do when there might be casualties?”, with the probably-kind-of-uncomfortable-but-frankly-very-practical answer of “it certainly beats having more casualties that would happen if you sat around and did nothing.”) Iori’s character arc is, effectively, this in a nutshell -- what’s the “right” thing to do when following principles alone doesn’t seem to be doing it? In the end, both Adventure and 02 are big on this -- preachy words and moralistic principles mean nothing in the face of striving to practically minimize damage and help others.

And so, Jou -- who himself grappled quite a bit with the dissonance between principles and pragmatism back in Adventure -- is the one to successfully reframe it in a way that Iori understands: most of all, Iori doesn’t want to see people get hurt, and whether “lying” or “not lying” is the right thing to do is not as relevant as “whether people are getting hurt”. Iori not lying would have caused a great deal more of hurt than lying, and it’s through understanding this kind of principle that Iori accepts that he still has a long way to go in terms of exercising his duty to others. The secondary Digimental arcs have a heavy theme of “acknowledging your deficiencies and resolving to improve”, and in the case of Iori and the Digimental of (this thing has been translated half a dozen ways, but, effectively, honoring your obligations to others), it involves his first major moment of coming to terms with the idea that the principles on paper he’s been stubbornly following aren’t going to do it by themselves.

Once the Kaiser arc concludes and the group is posed with the question on how to handle Ichijouji Ken, Iori’s reaction to him is the most infamously extreme: Ken is a Bad Person who is completely beyond forgiveness, and Iori wants nothing to do with him. It probably needs to be made clear that Iori’s stance on not wanting to forgive Ken is not inherently unreasonable. Ken really did some awful, horrible things in the first half of the series, and it is completely within Iori’s rights to decide that he doesn’t want to forgive or like Ken thereafter.

The part where Iori’s behavior starts posing issues is not the part about whether he likes Ken or not, but rather that Iori gets so hung up on that lack of forgiveness that he becomes very bad at observing the practical reality in front of him. Or, in other words, Iori gets so fixated on the principle of what happened in the past that he’s unable to make good judgment calls on what should happen going forward. It is abundantly clear to everyone by (at the latest) 02 episode 26 that Ken is not going to easily lapse back into his old ways and would like to make an effort to repair the damage he caused; regardless of whether they like him or not, it’s in their best interest to cooperate with him and let him help out (and even keep an eye on him to make sure bad things don’t happen again!), especially when the factor of Jogress comes into play and turns out to be a very valuable asset in the fight ahead. But Iori has a a rather squeamish, petty response when he tries to claim that they shouldn’t need Jogress (in the midst of everyone else being excited about the possibilities it poses, even without Ken in the equation) in 02 episode 28, and even when he does go along with everyone working with Ken in 02 episodes 28-29 during the Giga House Incident, he approaches it like he and Ken are bartering favors and that he’ll have to “repay” Ken before he can properly return to pigeonholing Ken as an Unequivocally Bad Person.

And so the issue here is: Iori being so determined to fixate on trying to stuff Ken into a neat box of a Bad Person isn’t good for himself, either, because it basically means he’s going out of his way to run pointless mental loops and maintain the feeling of stewing in a grudge against him, even when it’s helping absolutely nobody. Note the metaphor drawn when Iori practices kendo with Chikara in 02 episode 24 -- he keeps doing the same motion over and over again despite the fact it’s clearly not going anywhere, and Chikara has to warn him that doing nothing but aim for the head isn’t how you’re supposed to do it. Right now, Iori is having a hard time parsing things in ways besides shoving things in neat boxes of black-and-white morality, and this lack of flexibility is severely restricting his ability to be productive.

What starts to really cause Iori to make a major shift in his thinking process is none other than his connection with Takeru, a subplot that had already started kicking off all the way back in 02 episode 19, when Iori witnesses Takeru suddenly taking a violent shift in mood against the Kaiser to the point it scares him. Iori, of course, considers Takeru to be a “good" and “kind person”, but someone like that should (in his mind) logically not be making sudden, violent outbursts like that -- and especially once he starts advocating for BlackWarGreymon to potentially be killed if it comes down to it, going very against Iori’s fundamental principle that killing anything that’s sentient is unforgivably immoral.

This “contradiction” is what leads Iori to realize that he needs to do much more if he wants to understand Takeru properly, and it’s also the start of how Iori grows into the trait of his first Digimental, “Knowledge” -- or, more specifically (as defined by Koushirou in Adventure episode 24 and 02 episode 2), “curiosity and a drive to know more”. In the case of Iori, this manifests in “I want to know more about other people.” It’s Iori effectively understanding that his very limited view of the world and how people work isn’t sufficient in itself, and this concept becomes the crux of his character arc for the rest of the series.

After tussling around and getting increasingly confused about Takeru’s seemingly paradoxical behavior, Iori finally goes directly to Yamato to consult him about it in 02 episode 35, and Yamato explains the backstory behind Takeru’s trauma from losing Angemon back in Adventure episode 13, as well as a reminder that as much as it may have been his own fault, Ken technically went through some pretty similar trauma, and everything that’s happened since his fall from being the Kaiser hasn’t exactly been sunshine and roses for him either. Iori reflects on this as he goes home, with the important statement attached: he understands Takeru’s feelings. He’s now able to understand why Takeru acts the way he does, not on the grounds of principles of what’s right or wrong, but based on the fact that Takeru’s simply a very messy human being who’s not handling his own tendency to suppress his emotions well.

Because Takeru is such a convoluted person, and because Iori’s fundamental issue with approaching things involves unraveling some very deep-seated tendencies in his mentality, the way the two finally connect in order to properly Jogress requires something a lot more convoluted than just happening to clash in a single magical moment like Daisuke and Ken or Miyako and Hikari did. Iori starts off the episode catching himself when he’s about to fall back into “principles over practicality” again -- he starts railing on the others for (in his mind) taking the impending BlackWarGreymon fight too lightly, before Armadimon reminds him that he’s hungry, and Iori realizes -- again -- that he cannot effectively enforce “the right or wrong thing to do” without taking other people’s feelings properly into account. Realizing that this is is a barrier between him and the others, especially Takeru, Iori tries to adjust his thinking pattern and even becomes the one to advocate that everyone get some proper food and rest instead of charging into the fight unprepared.

The meal results in Iori getting yet another rare moment of letting himself truly enjoy something without restraint, and is also followed by Takeru speaking openly to him about their potential Jogress -- openly, honestly, not covering it up, not even with the same light playfulness he would usually put on (including what he had with the very same topic at the beginning of this episode). It is an acknowledgment from Takeru’s own part that he’s been watching what Iori’s doing and also wants to connect, and an open and serious statement from someone who had constantly tried to cover up everything with a smile up until that point, and, with the two reaching an understanding, they finally achieve their Jogress at the end of the episode.

This connection with Takeru, and the understanding that came from it, is what allows Iori to start applying a bit more flexibility towards approaching other situations. 02 episode 38 has him finally accepting Ken’s invitation to his Christmas party, after so many episodes of despising so thoroughly -- because now that he’s taking Ken’s position and feelings into account, he’s able to properly recognize him as someone doing his best to make amends going forward and be friends. Later, in 02 episode 44, despite having originally been the one more staunchly against it on principle, Iori handles the shock of having to kill an enemy with somewhat more grace than Miyako does, because not only had he already started considering the difficulty of fighting an enemy that cannot be reasoned with and wants nothing but wanton destruction (back during the end of 02 episode 29), Takeru is there to remind him that their priority must, first and foremost, be “saving lives” -- like, for instance, the girl in a wheelchair in front of him.

And so, the final episodes of 02 put everything Iori’s learned to the ultimate test, when he learns that the major perpetrator behind it all is none other than a friend of his departed father.

Up until this point, much of Iori’s mentality had been shaped by the rather saintlike image everyone had put up of Hiroki -- it’s almost certain that he must have had his own flaws as a person, but the resistance to speaking ill of the dead, and the generally positive influence he’d had on his friends and family and his untimely death by “protecting someone”, painted him as effectively a perfect, impossible ideal for Iori to strive to. Much of Iori’s justifications for his own behavior had consistently been reliant on “my father said this” or “would my father would have done this?”, such as his reason for forcing down his lunch in 02 episode 3, or using him as a mental model in 02 episode 44. For Iori’s former mentality of “good person” and “bad person”, this is the ultimate contradiction that threatens to rip apart everything Iori had built his own values system on -- that someone so incredible and saintlike and virtuous would be friends with someone so unambiguously doing horrible things like Oikawa. Iori, taking this as an awful emotional blow, parses this with a desperate desire to understand the motive behind why someone would do this, because it’s not enough for him to continue until he does.

And in 02 episode 49, we see Iori effectively forced to confront the fact that he can’t keep relying on the model of his father anymore as the sole basis for his way of life when, in the end, his father will never return. Iori doesn’t even know him that well; he can’t conjure up an image of him talking, or anything beyond just a flat, serene smile. And when the image of his father finally disappears, Iori almost immediately accepts it, as if he’d known the whole time.

It’s also significant that Iori declares that what he’ll do next is introduce Armadimon to his mother -- because, in the end, Iori is at least now capable of “moving forward”. He can’t get his father back, and the best thing he can do is make use of his existing support group and keep pushing forward with the people he does have in his life -- quite the opposite of Oikawa, who responded to the loss of that exact same person by clutching onto the remnants of the past they shared, and never becoming able to move on.

Hence, 02′s finale ends on none other than Iori, and when you think about it, this is actually a pretty unusual position to be in for someone who’s not the lead protagonist (Daisuke) nor the most prominent focus of the story (Ken)! But it’s a testament to just how important Iori is to this narrative on a thematic level -- all of the struggles about the morality of fighting and the disparity between principles and practicality (which dated all the way back to Adventure), and 02′s prominent theme of coping with loss and regrets and figuring out how to best move on, are all tightly entwined with the character arc of this nine-year-old child. (If you want to take the parallel between the Adventure narrative and Iori even further, Iori and Armadimon sharing the same voice actress is possibly one of the most prominent ways of indicating how a Digimon partner is fundamentally meant to express one’s inner self.)

And especially since Iori is the person who should have been the most vehement about having any kind of sympathy or compassion towards Oikawa -- just remember how determined he was to be cold towards Ken only half a series ago! -- and it leaves a strong impression of the huge, huge journey Iori had gone on through this series. Iori’s arc closes on him understanding the nature of what Oikawa had wanted this whole time, and understanding exactly what it meant for him to make that sacrifice right after finally meeting his partner, and ends the story the most emotionally affected by it -- because, after all, that’s the sort of truly kind person Iori is.

Iori after 02

By the time of Spring 2003, when Iori’s had some time to reflect on it, we learn from Iori that he still does not forgive Oikawa. That in itself is fine; remember, Iori is perfectly within his rights to not do so after all that he’s done. However, again, a distinction must be drawn between whether Iori forgives him, and whether he still considers it to be important to understand the mentality behind why Oikawa did what he did, and to reflect meaningfully on that instead of running himself in circles fixating on a grudge. Again, it’s about going forward with what he knows and has, instead of getting fixated on past deeds -- and with that, Iori resolves to “study”.

In The Door to Summer, we also learn that Iori allegedly has a “girlfriend” -- or, at least, someone Daisuke calls his girlfriend (Daisuke is a bit of an unreliable narrator here, given he’s also totally blown Hikari’s “rejection” of his beach hangout offer up as if it were a full-on total rejection of him completely). It is, perhaps, interesting that Daisuke is capable of getting this impression about Iori’s relationship with someone outside the 02 group, given that he’d been rather isolated from his peers all the way back in 02 episode 3...

Iori occupies an interesting position in Kizuna, because we only have one point in time where we got to intimately know him, and that was back when he was only nine years old -- and between that and Kizuna, there is a massive eight-year timeskip. He's 17 now, and we don't get any kind of catch-up period in the middle like we did with Takeru and Hikari in 02, and that is a time period where a lot of changes in demeanor could have happened with him compared to all of the others.

At first glance, it seems that he’s gotten much more stoic -- but this is actually something that should reasonably be expected, because now that he’s a teenager, it stands to reason that he would be much better at actually controlling his emotions and not necessarily get overwhelmed as easily. Plus, it’s not like he’s shown to be completely emotionless throughout the movie; he’s just doing a much more graceful job of holding himself back (look carefully at the credits and you can see him sweatdropping at Armadimon barging in on his practice), and moreover you can still see him deliver some pretty direct bluntness about the ramen in New York. Still with formal language, but nevertheless, no flattery is to be had here; Iori will dunk on you if he thinks you deserve it (even if it’s to do with mediocre ramen).

But there are some other interesting observations -- for one, the official website profile states that he’s actually settled on his future career in law at this point, and has made himself extremely busy in order to do so. (On top of that, he at least seems to be on friendly enough terms with his peers at school that they’re happy to greet him on their way out.) The drama CD indicates that Daisuke considers him the busiest out of the entire 02 group -- yet he and Takeru went out of their way to pick him up from school, because he’s that important to them. (Think about it -- how often do you see university students going this far to go retrieve a high school kid to hang out with them?) And likewise, Iori doesn’t even hesitate to state that he’ll make time for them, and throughout the movie he’s conspicuously seen in his school uniform, implying he really is moving things around to make it happen, because they’re that important to him.

He also engages in the single most chaotic action from this group, which is getting Armadimon to break into Menoa’s lab. It’s not that he’d inherently been against this kind of thing before, especially for something important (recall that he’d been happy to sneak into school for Golden Week with the others back during 02 episode 6), but it does beg the question of where and how he got this information that Armadimon could break electric locks. Perhaps he’s become a bit more, ah, pragmatic of a person since 02...

So, in the end, Iori does become an attorney, and specifically a defense attorney (the Japanese law system does draw the distinction). The person who once wanted to stick people he considered to be doing wrong into a “bad people” box and call it a day eventually came to embrace a career that involves understanding people and advocating for their perspective, or at least bargaining for something other than defaulting to the harshest assumption and a solution that allows all of the parties to best productively move forward.

He also has a daughter, who seems to have been raised to be as well-mannered and formal as he was. But, thankfully, he himself is there to help raise and guide her as she grows up.

#digimon #digimon adventure 02 #digimon adventure last evolution kizuna #kizuna spoilers #hida iori #iori hida #shihameta

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murder-raven13 · 3 years

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My Haikyuu Ships pt. 2

A/N: This is the continuation of my Haikyuu ships and the reason I ship them.

Warning(s): cursing, somehow these kind of turned into small relationship headcanons for some of them, not proofread, looooong

Word Count: 2,373

Part 1 Part 3

Yaku x Lev

Honestly, the height different is a big deal for me. So fucking cute, like...just what? Plus, Yaku is a grumpy smol and Lev is a happy toll and I just-

But Yaku is grumpy chaotic and Lev is puppy [and a little oblivious] chaotic and them together is just adorable chaotic. Lev irritates Yaku so much in the beginning [which, like, understandable; Lev’s a cocky idiot], but manages to learn how to deal with him. Develops an exasperated fondness for the giant. Lev learns how to control himself a little because of Yaku [this is partly because now Lev has a singular target for his mischief]. They’re just so cute and Yaku is so done [was highkey mad at himself when he caught feelings]. Lev was definitely to type to fall in love at first sight.

Suga x Oikawa

Okay, Okay, so like I don’t know how this one started for me. But I love them, okay? They don’t like each other at first because they’re rivals, not just because they’re on different teams but because they’re both setters. But then Oikawa also thinks Suga is unfairly pretty [who doesn’t?] and Suga returns the sentiment [the level of pretty in this relationship should be illegal; it has reached critical mass]. And then Oikawa finds that Suga is an instigating little gremlin who physically abuses people as a form of affection. And Suga finds that Oikawa is super dedicated and a literal perfect director when it comes to people [he can literally make anyone sing any tune he wants with his smile]. So, these two get along like a house on fire. Two manipulative meanies. They get into so much mischief together [Iwaizumi swears he’s going to kill them or himself]. But they also are just really soft. Like, Oikawa will burrow himself into Suga’s side no matter where there are or what position they’re in [clingy baby]. And Suga will bury his hands in Oikawa’s sweater whenever they’re cold [loves the way Oikawa will shriek if he touches his skin with his cold hands]. They leave sticky notes in each other’s bags or random places for the other to find [eventually] with little compliments or things on them. Just, they’re conniving, adorable bastards and I hate them.

Terushima x Daichi

This is another one where I don’t know where the fuck it came from. I’m not even sure I have a reason behind this other than Terushima being a smug asshole and Daichi having none of it. Terushima is a ball of reckless energy and he doesn’t take anything seriously despite being ridiculously intelligent [boy is in Class 7]. And Daichi, bless his soul, is a dad. All he does is take shit seriously and chorale reckless idiots onto the right path. So, when they get together, Terushima ensures that Daichi lets loose and doesn’t forget to take care of himself [by making sure he’s not too stressed or overworking himself]. And Daichi is, like, all of Terushima’s impulse control. Honestly the only reason Terushima doesn’t die. So, they keep each other on track and make sure that each is happy and doing their best. Just a very chill, well-balanced couple.

Ushijima x Tendou

These are both my babies and I cannot with them. Their cuteness hurts me. Ushijima is so stoic and so single-mindedly dedicated to the things that matter to him and the list of things that matter to him is short: volleyball, his family, and Tendou. That’s it. Man is legit just completely dedicated to Tendou, no questions asked, would help him bury a body. But he sucks at communication and showing his emotions. And that’s never been a problem with Tendou. Tendou never got tired of talking to him, never stopped trying to include him, was never bothered by how little Ushijima talked and Ushijima literally loves this man so much. And Tendou, my adorable little baby, was so lonely and so insecure. He expected everyone to judge him for his appearance or to leave him because he’s annoying or a freak. But Ushijima literally does not care about Tendou’s looks not being conventional; he thinks he’s attractive all the same and has no problem telling Tendou this. And Ushijima has made a sustained effort to interact with Tendou’s interests because he knows it makes Tendou happy [Tendou talks to him about his interests, so Ushijima makes sure he knows all of them so these conversations can happen]. Just, they’re so perfect, I can’t.

Tendou x Semi

Big, energetic Tendou with grumpy, stoic Semi. Gives me life. Semi acts irritated with Tendou’s antics, but he loves them, really. And Tendou knows it, too. Teasing little shit; Semi never gets a break. Tendou helps Semi whenever he’s feeling down because he’s not doing as well as he hoped [Semi wants to be the best but being the best is hard]. And Semi helps Tendou remember that opinions don’t matter; that he likes Tendou for all those weird, annoying qualities Tendou sometimes hates. They’re very sweet and, surprisingly, Semi is the one that initiates most serious physical contact [he initiates their first kiss, their first real hug, their first cuddle session, their first time, all of it] because Tendou wants to make sure that everything is going at Semi’s pace since Semi isn’t as comfortable with touch or intimacy. A very sweet, yet playful couple.

Shirabu x Goshiki

The small, itty-bitty amount of information I’ve been given about these boys is criminal. But I’ve seen enough to ship this. Goshiki is overzealous and a people pleaser; he just wants to be good enough to be great. One of the ones that wants to prove himself more than anything else. Praise is received extremely well. Shirabu, on the other hand, wants the opposite. He doesn’t want to be the best, he doesn’t want to be the one everyone relies on. He wants to be more of an invisible support beam, a minor cog in an overall grand and powerful machine. He’s not very forthcoming with his emotion, unless that emotion is annoyance or disdain. Goshiki tries to be cool, but can’t really keep his emotions in check very well. So, they, as a couple, play a kind of tug-of-war. Goshiki constantly pulls for more and Shirabu constantly pulls for less, which keeps the two of them balanced, putting out just enough that they’re constantly improving, just in subtle ways instead of grandiose ones. Shirabu tries to pretend he’s not a softie, but he is [only for Goshiki, though, who basks in the little moments Shirabu lets him have of uninhabited affection, whose rarity makes them worth the world to Goshiki].

Nishinoya x Tsukishima

This one came about because of the lowkey abusive relationship Noya has with Tsukishima. Noya is like 5′2 and Tsukki is like a whole foot taller. Yet Noya can and will stand up to Tsukki and let him know when he’s being an ass, physical methods used as necessary [most of this is limited to hitting his side or messing with his glasses if Tsukki’s face is within reach]. Noya will also mock Tsukki, playfully, and reminds him of his age, which is good for Tsukki because he’s chronically withering inside his little tsundre shell. Noya is also highkey really supportive. Whenever Tsukki does something good, no matter how subtle it is, Noya is there to give him recognition for it, which, again, reminds Tsukki that he can be nicer and that Noya can see him even when he’s trying to hide. And Noya has fun with Tsukki because he keeps him on his toes; they have a fun relationship built of just the right amount of trust and ‘lets remember to have fun’.

Daichi x Kuroo

My captain babes. Daichi and Kuroo both have very forthcoming personalities. But Kuroo is much better at remembering that it’s important he acts goofy and stupid sometimes because he’s a student, a kid, and carry a lot of stress. Daichi isn’t so good at this. He’s gotten so used to dealing with reckless children that need him to be a serious iron fist that he’s forgotten that he needs to let go sometimes and that that’s okay. Kuroo helps him remember this. And their relationship is built around understanding. When one needs help or a little space to deal with their serious stuff, the other is right there to be the pillar they need. If they need to goof around and forget a little, they’re there and prepped with hot chocolate and bad trivia games that Daichi sucks at. When they’re both stressed under piles of work, they never forget the other. They’ll sit next to each other at the table, on the bed, on the couch, the floor, with their legs or their shoulders or their feet lightly touching, just as a reminder that they’re there. If one falls asleep, the other will save their work and haul them to bed because sleeping slumped over isn’t any good. Out of my ships, this is definitely one of the best, in terms of matching and functionality as a serious couple.

Kuroo x Bokuto

They’re relationship isn’t as serious. Bokuto is a refugee for Kuroo, a place where he can unapologetically turn his brain off. He doesn’t have to be a captain or responsible or the top of his class. He can just be Kuroo and Bokuto has fun with him. They go on adventures and play volleyball together, experimenting with new moves or ideas all the time. Definitely the couple that would regularly go to the amusement park or the fair. Kuroo gives Bokuto his undivided attention whenever they’re together and spoils the hell out of him and Bokuto’s mood swings don’t bother him, he knows what to do. Boys are very committed to each other; they can’t imagine ever not being together because their relationship is just so fun and comfortable. It’s safe and loving, without a doubt, because they are, first and foremost, best friends.

Yaku x Kuroo

Hated each other at first because their middle school teams were rivals. And Yaku’s a grumpy little gremlin that can be a little too serious sometimes. But that’s just until he relaxes. Once he’s comfortable with people, he gets a lot less serious and just a little less grumpy [he’s an angry smol and my mind cannot be changed]. But he loves Kuroo. Can’t help snorting at Kuroo’s god awful chemistry pickup lines; they’re just that bad. He loves them, though. And he can throw them right back. They have chemistry and physics debates all the time, often while doing something completely non-serious, like Twister or that headband game. Kenma can’t stand being around them because they throw insults at each other like they’re compliments, loving voices and touches and all. Kuroo is always touching Yaku, will literally reach for him completely subconsciously, a fact Yaku mocks him ruthlessly for despite that fact that he always adjusts himself to fit the contact better [because he’s just as clingy as Kuroo, just not as openly]. Sickeningly cute behind closed doors, only mildly affectionate in public.

Oikawa x Kuroo

A couple that met later in life. I ship them as college students, to be honest. But they would be cute. Kuroo is goofy and a science nerd; Oikawa would alien talk him into a stupor. Iwaizumi is just glad he is no longer the sole participant in Oikawa’s space conversations. These two would casually come up with plans to demolish their opponent’s spirit and have fun doing it. Plot murder together on a regular Tuesday night. Would definitely be able to calm the other down when they began to take shit too far.

Ushijima x Oikawa

[Can y’all tell I’m a whore for the enemies to lovers trope?]

Ushijima is a huge ball of attractive stoic that doesn’t know how to properly act on his feelings. Has always admired Oikawa as a setter [legit has crushed on this boy since the first time they plated a game together in middle school and Oikawa vowed to beat him]. Ushijima has no problem telling Oikawa how much he admires his playing, his skill, and his determination to win no matter what. Oikawa had no idea in high school that Ushijima’s interactions with him were Ushijima’s way of showing he liked him. He saw it as antagonization because Ushijima thought he was better [Ushijima thought they would have been their best together]. His growing feelings for Ushijima forced Oikawa to face some of his own securities and grow as a person. Had to go through almost an entire identity crisis when he realized he was in love with Ushijima of all people. Iwaizumi wanted to throw his entire phone away Oikawa called him to whine so much. And Oikawa’s lack of understanding Ushijima’s advances forced Ushijima to become more adept at reading others and expressing his own feelings in a concise, clear way.

Kenma x Yamamoto

This is my favorite Kenma ship and one of my favorite overall ships. Let me tell you why. I did not ship them until season 4 because I didn’t know much about their relationship until then. But Tora and Kenma are another set that didn’t get along at first. Their personalities makes them natural antagonists to the other. Yamamoto is a try hard and always gives 120% in everything he does. Kenma is the type to give a very efficient 70%, meaning that he finds the best ways to get the same results 100% would have gotten, just without as much work put into it. And they have such a grudging respect for the other at first, once they begin to come to terms with the other. That respect grows and becomes the foundation for their relationship. They know that the other is going to do their job and they’re going to do it well. They have complete faith in the other and when they work together, their personalities become magnified. Kenma relies on Tora to be forthcoming and Tora expects Kenma to find the best way to do things. They just, they’re perfect, and I love them. Please, why is there so little content for this ship?

On that note, Imma end this. There will probably most definitely be a part 3 to this because I don’t have free time, but that’s never stopped me.

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i-prefer-the-term-antihero · 3 years

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Additionally, your thoughts on Dracula and Adrian from the Netflix adaptation of Castlevania? I find Dracula really tragic, and the ending scene of Season 2 crushed me because I was not expecting Adrian to cry. He’s usually so stoic and calm that I didn’t think he would weep, I expected him to just shrug it off like heroes usually do, but no, when given time to process everything, the first thing he does is break down into tears. Sypha was right in calling him a brooding teen in an adult body.

Ohh man. If you just take a look at my writing blog (or anywhere I post my fanfiction) it’ll become pretty clear pretty quickly how I feel about them XD So far all my Castlevania fics have been about the Tepes Family. Adrian and Drac are my favorite characters in the series!! (Though I do love pretty much all the characters in it.)

YES YES YES!!

They did an incredible job making Drac sympathetic and tragic. I don’t know if you know anything about the games, and granted, they couldn’t put a lot of story stuff in the games, but (at least as far as I’m aware) in most of them it’s like “ya, he was an evil dude who did evil things because he was evil.” So it actually would have been pretty accurate to the source to make him just an unsympathetic, irredeemable villain, but they didn’t and I LOVE them for it. Playing Symphony of the Night (Alucards game) after watching the series l was almost longing for that Drac I know and love from the series, (though it’s fun to see evil Drac too).

As I’ve said, I adore redeemable villains, and they did an amazing job with him, to the point where pretty much everyone in the fandom adores him, which is extremely tough to accomplish—even if you write a redeemable villain well, often large parts of the fandom don’t see it and hate the character. I knew that the point was that they were going to defeat Drac but I have to say, especially since I originally knew nothing of the games, I was hoping they’d save him by the end.

I think the fact that he liked and was kind to Hector and Isaac was evidence that he wasn’t too far gone. I mean, the only two people he genuinely trusted and liked in his court were human…that’s so interesting, I wish it was at least talked about, either in the show or in the fandom. I think he actually liked humans, partially or especially because of Lisa, he just...was so angry, and needed someone to blame. He probably ultimately blamed himself for not being there to save her, and it was just easier to blame the humans he once hated/didn’t understand, even if in reality he didn’t hate them as much as he thought he did...

Doing more thinking and research into the show for my “If These Walls Could Talk” fic I recognize now that symbolically it made sense even within the show that he died when Lisa died (which I can explain more about if you want but id probably end up going off on a long tangent so I’ll save it)...but I still thought practically, in the show, he could have still been redeemed.

Omg I LOVED that. The longer I take to sit with it, the more I realize just how much I loved that they put him crying instead of shaking it off.

It’s very interesting that Drac and Alucard are more openly emotional characters. I might be totally wrong, but as far as I remember, they (...and Lisa when she dies, and probably Isaac in a flashback), are the only main characters we see openly cry. It’s a pretty bold move to make any of your characters emotional like that, but especially your villain, and your bold handsome hero. It’s sooo easy to get emotional characters and emotions wrong…or just offputting to some people...but more on that later.

I think Adrian and Drac are both rather sentimental, in an odd way. Much of Drac’s motivations in the show and even in the games (the times his motivations are explained) had to do with his wives (yes he was married before Lisa in the games...unless Lament of Innocence was retconned...) which is interesting. So many of his decisions are based on emotion. He lets Lisa in just because he likes her, he goes to war with the world because of Lisa, he sits in his study mourning her loss, he let’s Alucard kill him… I also notice very often he digs his nails into his palms until they bleed, presumably because if he didn’t he’d hurt someone else (in the scene where he hurts Alucard, he does this). His sentimentality doesn’t diminish is power as a villain, which is SO difficult to accomplish.

I am emotional myself so I absolutely love to see emotional characters, but for most people, seeing even a normal character be emotional diminishes them in their eyes, or makes them whiny, so making your villain even a little emotional, and having that not take away from the audiences perception of their power as a villain is sooooooo hard to do, and I applaud them for making a so well-beloved, and still villainous and intimidating, but also emotional (at times) villain.

For Alucard. I don’t see any problem with him being emotional, but it makes even more sense if he’s a teen in an adult’s body—which was indeed portrayed quite well.

Yes that was interesting when he cried when drawing his parents!! I wasn’t expecting that when I saw him drawing them. I was enjoying and intrigued by his story so much, then when he started crying I was caught off guard—but in a good way. It really made me feel for him, and understand that he was still grieving his mother, and that knew the gravity of what he was currently doing.

I think it’s kind of important to show that kind of thing in a situation like this. It’s easy to think Alucard hates his dad, and they need to show the emotion of the situation to make it clear “no he doesn’t hate his dad, this actually breaks his heart, he just knows he has to do this.”

I loved when he was telling Trevor and Sypha about how much the world would lose by killing Dracula. It’s really interesting that he hides his emotion with them, and that Trevor and Sypha are so stoic. The son of Dracula isn’t the guy you expect to be the only hero who cries.

In “For Love” when Trevor’s like “Don’t get weepy about it” I was sitting there, sobbing, like “No, please get weepy about it! Let the boy cry for goodness sake!! Give me some emotion!!” But I too was not expecting him to cry like he did, and in grieving the death of his parents...

I knew the crying scene was coming because I’d seen pictures of it on here and pinterest, but I had no context for it. In the end it wasn’t just the weeping itself that made the scene so impactful, it was everything surrounding it. I didn’t know it would happen when he was completely alone (and would be for the foreseeable future), and in grieving his parents, or about the ghosts/flashbacks before it (cementing his grief), or that it was literally the last scene of the season, or that there would be no music for both the scene and the credits thereafter.

And that was what really got me.

Because, firstly, we never got to see any flashbacks to his childhood, and that was what I was begging for the entire series (and hence why its what I write about). To finally get it, and it not to just be something the audience gets to see, but something Alucard himself is seeing... a happy memory he’s seeing when he knows that is completely gone, he cannot hope to have it again, and for him to now be in his father’s place…that’s heartbreaking. Like just having your character cry—let alone those kinds of full-on sobs—is painful enough, showing a son grieving his parents is a particularly heart wrenching kind of sadness, but showing that he is haunted by memories of those parents he lost—not only lost but one of which he killed, and, if SOTN is canon for the show, the other of which he could have saved—of a happy childhood, and he is alone with these memories for the foreseeable future...that is truly heart wrenching.

Also the scene with Trevor and Sypha in the wagon earlier in the episode was super sweet, they could have easily put the Adrian crying scene earlier, and had the Trevor and Sypha scene be the last scene of the season (and Trevor’s game actually does end with them looking into the sunset, so ending with the last scene of “For Love” would be accurate as well), and left it on a positive note, and the audience would have been left with a completeness. But they made a conscious choice put his crying scene last, and it was so powerful, because it made you remember that at the end of the day, he isn’t just our bold handsome hero, he was a son who lost both his parents, and that, to him, this isn’t really a triumph, but a loss. It also kinda confirmed that Drac wasn’t an "evil guy, end of story". That there was reason to grieve him, and to show his son grieving, and to leave it there because of it. It was a personal gravity too

In the end, it was the lack of music in the scene, and even more so during the credits, so theres only his tears, and all you are left with in the end is this amplified emptiness that really did me in. I think I literally sat there, tear tracks on my face, my mouth open when I hit the credits.

Playing Symphony of the Night after watching the show is really interesting in exploring his character. I knew there was very little story, so I wasn’t expecting much from the story, but I actually found that I was beyond excited whenever there actually was some story, and the few lines they did say are stuck with me.

Maria comments early on that Alucard’s not very good at talking. At first I just chalked it up to...weird translations or whatever. But the more I played the game and the more I thought about him in the show...I think she’s right. He’s not very good at talking, yet if and when he does talk he’s quite eloquent, and precise with his words. (This actually makes him a somewhat difficult character to write). I wonder if perhaps this has some connection to his emotionalness. He’s very careful with what he says, and this may spread to what he does—such as being careful when he shows emotion. I’m curious why he’s like this. It could just be his nature, but I wonder if as a kid he was ever hated because he was a vampire—maybe people made fun of him, and he cried, and they made more fun of him because of it—and he learned both to hide his emotions, and that he had to be very deliberate and show people he didn’t mean any ill will with his words. (And he looks older than he is so people might call him immature for acting his mental age). All very speculative, of course. But it’d be fun to write about!

Also, another thing from SOTN that is related to this topic, there was a fight that really struck me (enough I actually wrote a fic about it (inverted recurrence)). SOTN takes plays 300 years after the events of The Netflix Series (aka Dracula’s Curse). Most of the bosses don’t seem to have a lot of meaning story-wise, they’re just there for you to fight. The other day I (Alucard) walked into a boss room...and there were Trevor, Sypha, and Grant (who was omitted from the Netflix series). They were fake versions of them, of course. And there’s no dialogue in the fight so maybe I’m just speculating, but what struck me was that the fact that Dracula could use them against him probably means he still cares about them, even after 300 years. It probably also means that they’re some of the only friends he’s ever had. Granted, he was asleep for a good chunk of those 300 years, still. It goes back to that sentimental-ness I was talking about earlier.

I few years ago I watched the Gravity Falls commentaries, and from them I got a lot of the writing advice I still think about and use today. Alex Hirsch said something on this subject which I really liked which is “Hold your tears.” When a character cries they’ve broken, that’s as far as they can go. So if you make a character cry when the audience themselves doesn’t feel the weight of the scene, or it doesn’t feel like the character has broken yet, it can feel like too...much/cheesy, and distance the audience. especially with cartoons where the way it’s drawn can actually affect your sympathy for the character (it can look weird or accentuated).

They did such an awesome job with this by literally holding his tears until the very end. I don’t know how other, non-emotional people felt about it, but Ive don’t know if I’ve ever seen tears used so well in a show, pack such a punch. To have it not just be a part of the scene but literally the focus, and at the end...it was powerful.

Sorry for the long response, and more importantly, I’m beyond sorry for taking so so SOOO long to respond. I hope you enjoy my response, if you see it <3

P.S. For anyone else who made it all the way to the end, I actually have a Castlevania sideblog now: @symphonyofthewrite !! I’d be beyond happy to recieve asks like this over there, if you’d like to hear more of my thoughts!!

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