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3d-wifey · 3 years

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NSFW Alphabet: JD Edition

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Pillow talk galore. And he's surprisingly cuddly afterward.

B = Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partners)

He's pretty proud of his brain. Not to toot his own horn, but he's a pretty clever guy. He's a quick thinker and he managed to plan and execute three murders while making them look like suicides.

He's awfully fond of your hips. How nicely they fit your jeans, how his hands look on them, the noises you make when he squeezes them a little too tightly.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum, basically)

I can't see him ever remembering to wear a condom and having a kid is not in his cards (yet), so he's definitely pulling out. He likes to finish on your face or your stomach. It's almost like he's marking you. But, if you're fucking in public, he'll cum in your panties and he expects you to walk around in them.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Not inherently sexual, but he's been looking for ways to tie you to him since he met you. He always thought marriage was a shame, too easily broken. So getting you pregnant after high school seems like the perfect plan. Of course, he's not getting your opinion on it beforehand. That's why it's a secret.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

None, considering he was a virgin before you. Surprising since he's so good-looking, but he's not the type to be attracted to people he can barely stand. You're the only person he actually liked being around in, well, ever. So, anything he does sexually is based purely on instinct and what you tell him you like.

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying)

Any position where he can have a good look at your face. He's pretty partial to you being on top of him though.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

Jason's a pretty intense guy with a dry sense of humor, so I can't see him making any jokes during it.

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Hates being clean-shaven. Something about being bald down there doesn't sit right with him, and it's way too much work. He doesn't grow a lot of hair in the first place, but he'll trim it down if it bothers you so much. But not without some bitching on his part.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? The romantic aspect.)

Jason isn't a romantic person by nature, at least not in the traditional sense. However, he's very attentive in his own way. If it's anything other than a quickie, you'll find he's pretty focused on your pleasure, your reactions. Some might even say obsessed.

J = Jack off (Masturbation Headcanon)

He doesn't really have a reason to when he could just pull you into an empty classroom or something. However, he'll do it if you're nowhere around and he can't, for some reason, sneak over to your place. But considering he's around you almost 24/7, it happens less and less.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Blood. Not your own, but he likes seeing other people's blood on you. I could totally see him fucking you in front of a dead body if it didn't get incriminating fluids all over the crime scene.

Choking. Going both ways. Not to the point where you might pass out, but he's aiming to leave bruises. He definitely wants you to wrap your hand around his throat until he goes lightheaded.

Hickeys. I know what you're thinking and I want you to stop thinking it because you're wrong. He wants you to mark him up. He's a very pale boy and he bruises easily, so you can apply the slightest pressure and he'll look like a leopard. He likes to show them off and the dull pain that comes when he presses on them shoots straight to his dick.

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere, anytime. He doesn't much care about getting caught. And it's not like he can't take care of anyone who saw something they shouldn't have.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

You, wholly and completely. He's a teenage boy in love, you could wear a nun outfit and he'd still find it sexy.

N = No (Something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

He's a part of the anti-mommy/daddy kink club. His mommy and daddy issues are both too strong for him to view those words in a sexual light. Just the thought of them is boner repellent.

He's also not doing anything that could seriously wound you, on purpose or by accident. So, knives are out of the picture.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Likes giving and receiving pretty equally. However, there's something about being in between your legs and knowing that he's the one pulling those sounds and reactions from you.

It's borderline euphoric.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He doesn't really have a set pace. It usually depends on his mood, which is ever-changing.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Like I said in the Stamina part, he has a stupid high sex drive, so quickies are his best friends. In your car during lunch, in storage closets in between classes, etc. Name a place and he's doing you there.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

He'd do just about anything you asked of him. He's a murderer, there's no bigger risk than that.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

I'd say 2 rounds (3 max if you're riding him). And how long each round lasts depends on the pace he's going. All in all, definitely nothing to spit at.

T = Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He definitely doesn't own any toys of his own, his hand gets the job done just fine, thank you very much. But I can see him using toys on you if you ask. He's really only doing it to humor you.

U = Unfair (How much they like to tease)

He can't dish it or take it. He thinks he's a totally tease, and he does so good at first, but he always gets too horny to actually go through with the plan. He gives in too easily.

Teasing doesn't work on him either, because as soon as you make the smallest hint that you're in the mood, he's ready to go. Whenever, wherever.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He doesn't moan often, more into groaning and grunting. But the man is a talker.

W = Wild Card (A random headcanon for the character)

Something about you acting aggressive or violent really gets him going. Murder's his foreplay, babe.

X = X-ray (Let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Above-average at about 7-7.5 inches with a slight curve to the left. He's longer than he is thick and he has a cute beauty mark at the base of his shaft. Like I said earlier, he's not clean-shaven but he'll reluctantly trim for you if you want him to.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He's a healthy, teenage boy. And like most teenage boys, he has an overactive libido. So, he's ready anyplace, anytime.

Z = Zzz (How quickly they fall asleep afterward)

He actually isn't that tired after, assuming you've only gone one round. But if you're both pushing into oversensitivity, he's cuddling up to you and passing out right after.

#jd x reader #jd heathers #heathers #jason dean x reader #jason dean #smut

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faulty-writes · 3 years

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This is a little different than most of my other works, but I'm trying to branch out and write for more of the secondary or minor characters. I actually adore the Todoroki family, especially Fuyumi and Natsuo. So I hope you guys enjoy this little appreciation piece featuring Natsuo who no doubt deserves more love considering he's a very interesting and complex character, at least in my opinion.

[ Natsuo is known as 'the nice guy' on campus despite also being recognized as a "Todoroki" and many knowing of the relation he holds to the number one hero, Endeavor. He's had plenty of experiences where people have used him because of this, but the latest one leaves him a tad heartbroken. What other choice does he have but to run to you? ]

The sound of his abnormally thick tears landing on the tiled flooring of the hallway faintly echoed as he continued on his way. Ignoring all the looks and obvious gossip that would come with the fact he was so shamelessly crying in the middle of a school day.

A sniffle came as Natsuo reached up and with some force, wiped his right eye with the end of his signature gray hoodie sleeve which he normally wore on campus. The very campus he had grown to love over the past year and the one Fuyumi had insisted he go to in order to study medical welfare.

It was funny, he could still hear her words echoing in his head, ‘Leave our family circumstances to me and go do what you want to pursue,’ and that he did. He knew he shouldn’t have been surprised that his sister offered to take the brunt of their family problems and encourage him to do what made him happy.

But at the same time, Natsuo hadn’t originally wanted to leave his sister or youngest brother behind. He didn’t trust their well-being with ‘Endeavor’ around, despite his mother having long since recovered from the mental and physical abuse the so-called "number one hero" put her through.

Since the death of his eldest brother, Touya. He couldn't shake this protective and anxiety-ridden feeling that had been slowly growing inside of him. He'd be damned if anything happened to his remaining siblings, even if it meant he'd experience more emotional trauma in the long run.

Much like today. College was supposed to be a fun time, and while Natsuo understood that some enjoyed ‘experimenting’ and partying rather than studying. He was never much of the party type and while he knew he was attracted to other genders, he never outwardly acted on it.

Knowing how his father treated his mother was the one thing that drove him to desire a true romantic relationship and that was what he thought he had. Unfortunately, there was a cruel reality that came with being the son of Endeavor, and while he should be used to people trying to get close to him when they found this out.

He never thought they would sink so low as to try and date him on the off-chance they'd get to meet the number one hero. His fingers sunk into the front of his hoodie, twisting the fabric as a soft ache coursed through his chest.

Which he could only describe as a broken heart and despite wanting to go back to his own room, bury his face into a pillow, and hide under his covers. There was one person he wanted, no needed, to see. It wasn’t his mother or sister, not even his youngest brother. It was you.

Strangely, since the start of his first year in college. He seemed to gravitate towards you, at first he believed it was only due to the fact that you were also studying something related to the medical field. But as your friendship continued and he got to spend more time with you, he realized that he genuinely enjoyed your company.

The fact he found himself telling you things, secrets that he wouldn’t have thought of sharing outside of his family was a pleasant surprise. Maybe you were just easy to talk to? He wasn’t sure, but he did know that unlike most.

You weren’t going to use him just because of his relation to Endeavor, though he knew you were interested in hero studies. There was no worry in his mind that you’d use him for some hero-related advantage.

Another sniffle came before he reached up to once more wipe away his tears, even if his effort was in vain considering more just came. He took a deep breath, trying to both collect and center himself. ‘Man, this backpack feels heavy,’ he thought as he clenched his jaw and focused his attention on the floor.

Counting the familiar shapes in the tile that he knew would eventually lead to your room. The logical reason for his backpack feeling so heavy was due to the fact it was filled to the brim with various textbooks and a few notebooks that were scribbled with his writing.

He could feel the slight bitter sting of frost beginning to grow on his tear-stained cheeks which he ignored for the moment. Still, he wiped his eyes once more before picking up his pace. He soon began to speedwalk which turned into a jog which eventually led him to frantically running and accidentally stumbling into your door.

Once more, he seemed to get stares from the passersby. But in a way, he couldn’t blame them. He wasn’t even sure how he looked slumped against another student's door with his arms stretched above his head and his hands closed into fists.

His forehead was pressed against your door and his tears continued to slowly fall. His eyebrows came down and for a moment, he wondered what he was doing before the door suddenly opened. “Hel-” your sentence came to a stop when the white-haired boy stumbled forward and your hands instantly grasped his arms.

Your stance stiffening as you unconsciously seemed determined to stop him from falling. One of your legs was bent back, and the other bent forward. An awkward silence filled the air before you heard the soft sound of something hitting the wooden floor of your room.

It reminded you of water and a few seconds later, Natsuo lifted his head. You instantly noticed those tears and felt his hands curl into the front of your shirt, funny you hadn’t noticed or felt the pressure of his hands there before.

But in a way it made sense, Natsuo was always very gentle. Even when handling the few people who volunteered to pretend to be "patients" during his medical welfare classes. In fact, it seemed he was downright cautious when it came to others.

Never necessarily wanting to cause trouble and sometimes acting rather shy unless you happened to bring up a topic he didn’t like. You had long since learned the reason why he preferred to keep the topic of ‘family’ out of conversations.

Yet, you wondered if Natsuo was crying because of something related to just that. But you knew you shouldn’t jump to conclusions just yet. Still, you couldn’t help but look into those blue orbs of his. The look of hurt was clearly visible, not only in his eyes but also indicated by the way his face was twisted.

Then he leaned forward, allowing a soft whimper to escape in the process. Partly burying his face into the front of your shirt as he lifted his leg up. Then without warning, he slammed his foot against the floor. Which caused you to jump, but you didn’t dare release Natsuo.

Especially as his tears soaked into the fabric of your shirt, unlike most Natsuo's tears were always cold. You assumed it was due to his quirk, but before you could say anything the sound of Natsuo’s cracked and broken voice caught your attention.

“D-Damn it,” the stuttered words filled the air and you frowned, wanting nothing more than to run your fingers through that white snow-like hair of his before you glanced back up. Noticing a few people staring into your doorway, you honestly didn’t know why they were staring or why they weren’t minding their own business.

But you did know that something was clearly wrong with Natsuo and whatever that something was caused this reaction. You shot the bystanders a glare before focusing back on Natsuo. You opened your mouth to speak, but were interrupted by the sound of his voice once more.

“I...am so sick of this,” his words, of course only confused you. What was he sick of and how did it relate to his current state? You managed to straighten out your legs, however, Natsuo continued to cling to you.

His tears hadn’t ceased nor those soft almost desperately gasps for breath. “I’m sorry,” he suddenly said before he turned to look over his shoulder. His hands remained curled into the front of your shirt as he looked at the many people staring at the two of you.

Some seemed curious as to what was happening and others amused to see the almost grown man crying in the arms of his friend. With more strength than he intended, he once more lifted his foot and slammed your door shut.

The noise it created echoed through your room and though Natsuo felt guilty for having treated your door in such a manner, his chest was already aching profusely. When he turned back to face you, the fact he had small bits of ice underneath his eyes and on the skin of his cheeks didn't go unnoticed by you.

Your hands left their position on Natsuo’s forearms to gently cup his face, it shouldn’t be a surprise that he was cold to the touch. You knew that was yet again another semi-harmless side effect due to his quirk, despite the fact you had never actually seen him use it.

Part of you wondered why that was. Still, you couldn’t help but allow your thumbs to run over those specs of ice stuck to his moist cold cheeks and the desire to get a warm hand towel to clean his face was strong.

You weren’t sure if you wanted to ask what happened first or calm him down enough so he would tell you with as little of a fight as possible. Your touch was welcomed as Natsuo reached up and laid one of his hands over yours.

“Do you...want to sit down?” you questioned and Natsuo looked momentarily confused before he glanced away as if he were thinking about something. Sometimes when he acted like this, it annoyed you. You knew how guilty Natsuo could feel over things that he either shouldn’t or weren’t even his fault.

He was here crying into your arms, but you knew somehow he'd make up a reason to feel guilty about it. ‘Well, that isn’t going to happen today,’ you thought as you released his face and reached down to take hold of one of his hands.

Even though they too were always cold, you couldn't help but find some odd sense of comfort when you were holding him by the hand. Despite the fact, Natsuo was significantly larger than you. But, you assumed that was only due to the fact that he physically took after his father.

The fact he went to the gym daily only added to that overall intimidating stature of his. Regardless, you squeezed his hand in reassurance as you guided him towards your bed. He made no move to resist your guidance and once you had him sitting down, you gently laid your hands on his shoulders.

Those tears were now single drops that slowly slid down his icy cheeks and you'd be lying if you stated it didn't hurt seeing Natsuo like this. You took a deep breath. “Stay here,” you instructed, “I’m going to get a warm towel, you have ice on your face,” Natsuo seemed rather surprised and reached up to touch his cheek.

Using his thumb to glide along the skin and sure enough, he could feel the smooth surface of the small patches of ice. “Oh…” he said before a sniffle came. “Sorry,” though most would know not to apologize for something beyond their control.

Still, he couldn’t help but fold his hands into his lap. Squeezing them between his thighs. His feet were nervously tapping against the floor, creating a rhythmic pattern and if one listened carefully enough, they’d recognize it was the pattern of a standard heartbeat.

In a way, it was amazing how much subconscious knowledge you could obtain. Natsuo failed to notice the rhythmic pattern, but you could hear it clear as day even from the bathroom where you proceeded to ring out the warm hand towel.

A soft groan escaped him, and his thighs were the only thing keeping his hands in place. Else he would be running them through his unusual spiky hair and possibly pulling it out. ‘What am I even doing here man?!’ he frantically thought.

‘Y/n...is always the person I run to, I keep bothering them but I’d rather be like this than…’ his jaw clenched when the thought of Endeavor entered his mind and a soft growl rumbled in his throat before he heard your footsteps which prompted him to raise his head.

You noticed he was looking at the wet towel you held with an expression only a curious and slightly confused child would make. “Mm,” once more he looked away, feeling the guilt continue to build as you sat down next to him and laughed.

"Don’t tell me you’re feeling guilty again,” you stated, and not to your surprise, Natsuo turned his head to look at you. His tears seemed to be completely dry and you wondered if that was because he was here with you or that he simply overworked his tear ducts.

“Sorry,” he muttered, still focused on the towel you held and the small amount of steam that seeped from it. “I...get it's kind of crazy for me to keep running to you but-” you shook your head, quickly interrupting him.

“But nothing,” you replied as you leaned forward, “that’s what friends do and you and I have been friends since the start of our freshman year,” that had to count for something, right? You reached over, cupping one side of Natsuo’s face.

“Now stay still, I want to get that ice off your face, and then you can tell me what’s bothering you,” the words left your mouth almost like a friendly command. But like most of the time, Natsuo didn’t seem to take offense.

He simply nodded and gave you a look that you knew meant he understood. Very gently, you pressed the towel to his face. Applying some pressure to ensure the bits of ice chipped off and sure enough, you could see the clear cold pieces slowly begin to melt.

When you began to wipe his opposite cheek, you couldn’t help but raise the question. “Hey Natsuo,” you began, effectively catching his attention and the soft, “Hm?” he responded with. “I’ve never seen you actually use your quirk,” you pointed out.

“Is there a reason for that?” a gasp came when Natsuo suddenly jerked his head away from you. “Uh…” blinking once or twice. You lowered the wet towel to your lap and grasped onto it. Twisting the fabric between your fingers to allow the now lukewarm droplets of water to soak into the pajama bottoms you were wearing.

Maybe you crossed a line? Did this have anything to do with his family? As far as you knew, his mother possessed a rather powerful ice quirk. Was that the reason he never used it? You weren’t sure, but usually, when Natsuo acted in this closed-off manner it was related to his family.

“Sorry,” you said, “I didn’t mean to pry, I was just curious,” the explanation was simple and you hoped Natsuo would believe you. He took a deep breath and let out a sigh before bringing his hand up, running his fingers through his hair.

“It’s fine,” he replied, though you could tell his voice was a little strained before he turned to you. That’s when you saw the frown on his face and his eyes looked misted over as if he were going to cry again. You really didn’t want that.

“Natsuo are you-” though the answer was obvious, he wasn’t okay if he had come running to you in tears. But even so, Natsuo nodded. “Yeah…” he reached out, grasping the wet towel that you were previously holding before he got up.

You wanted to ask where he was going, but it was clear he was only heading to the bathroom. “It’s just…” you heard the wet plop of the towel landing in the sink before Natsuo walked back out and once more took his seat on your bed.

You reached out, laying your hand on his thigh. “You don’t have to tell me,” you offered with a kind smile, but Natsuo shook his head. “It’s fine,” he repeated yet again before allowing his hand to rest by his side.

“Big bro Touya and I used to play around with our quirks, but Touya was always so serious about his,” you watched as his expression grew dark and a clear hateful glance appeared in his eyes which seemed distant at the moment.

This was more than likely due to the fact that Natsuo was picturing his late brother alongside his father. “Uh…” you glanced down and watched as the hand that laid by Natsuo’s side began to curl into a fist, though you knew he would never actually raise that fist or cause harm to you.

It was just shocking how the subject of his family brought out this side in him, but you remained quiet and continued to listen. “Because of that...bastard and I hated seeing Touya like that!” he suddenly exclaimed, leaning forward as his fists began to tremble, and without much thinking, you laid your hand on his back.

"Natsuo…” you said, hoping your voice would bring him back out of the hateful moment he was in. His jaw was clenched and a shiver ran up your spine when you felt Natsuo’s trembling hand take a grip on your upper arm.

But there was still that familiar gentleness to it which indicated to you that even when Natsuo was temporarily blinded by this hatred, he was still aware of his surroundings and those that were important to him.

This was only confirmed when he lifted his head to look at you with a smile, though it was small. It was still present and seemed to put you at ease for the moment. “I’m okay but…” he once more turned away from you and a sigh escaped him.

“I convinced big bro to have fun with our quirks instead of doing what the old man wanted him to, but since he...died. I...I couldn’t bring myself to use my quirk again and I’m sure sis feels that way too,” your frown deepened, ah so that’s why.

Maybe he fears he’ll lose the memory of his elder brother if he were to use his quirk again? “What else happened?” Natsuo looked back at you, confused for a brief moment before, “Oh...right,” he said as if he had almost forgotten he ran to you in broad daylight with tears streaming down his face.

He turned, bending down to slip his shoes off before he slid his backpack onto the floor. Then he proceeded to climb onto the bed or rather proceeded to crawl over to your pillows and plop himself down.

Being surrounded by your familiar scent eased him as did the fact he could stretch both his arms and legs out. You looked at him all sprawled out and comfortable. ‘Well...I guess if it makes him feel better,’ you thought as you watched Natsuo stare at the ceiling.

His face twisting with a variety of emotions that made you wonder just what caused him to cry in the first place. He didn’t deserve that, or at least not in your opinion. “She broke up with me,” he suddenly said, his voice somewhat quick and you barely understood what he said.

“Who?” you questioned as you got onto your knees and pressed your hands into the mattress, looming over Natsuo much like how a dog or loyal companion would. "My girlfriend…” he muttered as he once again looked to the side, you assumed it was an attempt to look away from your gaze which was a mess of confusion.

“Why did she break up with you?” It was said that getting your heart broken was hard to handle, but there had to be more behind this. You sat on your knees, placing your hand on your hip as you looked down at Natsuo who slowly turned his gaze back to you but seemed to avert it just as quickly.

Despite his overall twisted expression that laid somewhere between sad and angry, you also noticed the faint pink tint to his cheeks. Was that from anger or embarrassment? You honestly couldn’t tell. But Natsuo normally didn’t get embarrassed around you and you knew he knew he could tell you anything.

‘It must be from anger,’ you concluded as you continued to wait patiently for his answer. “I’m so tired of it,” he said in a soft voice which prompted you to lean closer. “Tired of it?” you repeated, clearly not understanding where that was coming from.

“I’m sick of being recognized just because of the old man's last name!” he exclaimed once more, though his voice wasn’t raised too high. It still caused you to jolt back, then again you should have realized this whole thing had something to do with his family.

Natsuo turned to you and impatiently pressed his hands against the mattress so he could sit up. His jaw was clenched again and his eyebrows slit in anger and the way he kept his eyes locked on you made you feel a little uncomfortable despite the fact you knew his anger wasn’t directed at you.

Then a sigh came and Natsuo’s head dropped. You saw this often when he was trying to collect or calm himself down. It honestly worried you that he was always going between emotions, trying to keep himself in check for the sake of others.

His eyes were closed, but when he opened them once more you could see the absence of anger. “I wanted to study medical welfare to actually help people…” he confessed as he brought his legs up to his chest and you watched as he wrapped his arms around them.

Those long sleeves of his hood concealing the contraction of his muscles and biceps. He seemed to stare off into the distance once more. “I wanted to make a difference in the world so the name Todoroki could actually mean something to me, unlike the tie it has to that bastard,” he hissed and like a switch, that anger was back.

You could even hear that soft rumbling of a growl threatening to admit from his throat. “I don’t want to be recognized as a Todoroki just because of him!” you opened your mouth to speak, but all thoughts and actions escaped you when Natsuo turned to look at you.

Once more sporting that angry expression which was terrifying in its own way. But then, it slowly began to fade into sadness and he lowered his arms. Allowing his hands to fall back onto the mattress, you couldn’t help but glance down when you felt his fingers brush against yours before you looked back up.

“I don’t want people trying to get close to me because of him either,” Natsuo stated and you gasped when you felt his cold hand engulf yours, taking firm grip as if he was silently gesturing to you that he needed some form of physical comfort.

“But that’s exactly what she did,” you felt that hand begin to tremble and you quickly gave it a reassuring squeeze. “She used you to get to your father?” you questioned, a little confused but still showing an effort that you wanted to get the story correct.

Natsuo nodded. “She’s an inspiring hero I guess," he said with a shrug, "and wanted to get close to me so she could have the chance to speak to my father,” his tone sounded like he had given up as he tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling.

That ache in his chest returned, but somehow your touch prevented it from growing any further. “Guess I was more interested in caring for her that I didn’t see it,” he commented before tilting his head back down. “Just tired of it,” he repeated.

"I wouldn’t introduce my father to anyone I’m with...they deserve better than to be exposed to him!” you could imagine that’s how the rest of his story went then. His ex-girlfriend trying to pressure him into introducing her to Endeavor only for Natsuo to express his concern and reasons for why he couldn’t.

Then from there she must have gotten angry and confessed the truth. The whole situation was unfair and you could feel your own anger brewing, using people was one thing. But using them for your own personal benefit, pretending to love them?

That wasn’t exactly forgivable in your book. No wonder he was crying. “I’m…” would saying you’re sorry even do anything? You knew Natsuo wouldn’t take offense, but it seemed unfitting for the current situation. Instead, you found yourself leaning over.

Releasing his hand in order to wrap your arms around him, nuzzling your head against his shoulder as you embraced him. Natsuo while not overly shocked at your friendly gesture, crossed his legs and wrapped his arms around your waist before pulling you even closer.

Though your back slightly hurt, you didn’t mind. Natsuo, while not completely touch-starved, still melted into anyone’s affection. You felt his stiff body finally relax and the cool touch of his cheek against your ear as he nuzzled the side of your head.

“Thank you,” he whispered, despite the fact, there was no one else around to hear you two. “I know I keep bothering you whenever-” you reached up to tug on the back of his hair.

“You’re not a bother,” you said in a stern tone, “and you should be happy that girl is now your ex, you didn’t deserve what she put you through,” your arms tightened around him just before you pulled back and grasped his shoulders.

Making sure he was looking at you before you continued to speak, “No one deserves that, you’re a wonderful person Natsuo and I know there are others that won’t care that you’re a Todoroki or that will help you make it into a name you can be proud of,” you assured him and watched as the faintest expression of hope washed over his face.

Just that alone meant the world to you and while you knew Natsuo didn’t need any protection, you still wanted to try your best to be there for him. “Come on,” you insisted as you crawled over him in order to reach the opposite side of your bed.

Though Natsuo took up most of the space, you managed to lay down and offered him your hand. That smile of his seemed to grow and as expected, he gently grasped onto your hand as he laid down by your side.

“You can stay here if you want, it’s still daylight and I don’t have any more classes for today,” you insisted and hoped he’d take the bait because you didn’t exactly trust he wouldn’t get emotional again later.

Natsuo always seemed to overthink things and maybe that’s where his sense of guilt came from. “Hm?” he glanced away and you were quick to speak. Taking a firm grip of his hand, you slipped your fingers between his and gave him a stern expression.

“Don’t let your guilt tell you that you’re going to be a bother, I want you to stay,” your words were accompanied with another reassuring squeeze, and once more his gaze was directed back on you.“...Okay,” he replied, you smiled and turned your attention to the ceiling.

Allowing your intertwined hands to remain nestled between you. Your mind was free of any thoughts, unlike Natsuo who was debating how he could even thank you for everything you did for him. Just listening to him was enough, but you went the extra step to dry his tears and invited him to stay for however long he wanted.

Was it that you knew he found comfort in you, your scent, your presence? Is there any way he could express his gratitude? Suddenly his own words came back, echoing like thunder inside his head. ‘I...couldn’t bring myself to use my quirk again,’ he held his breath and slowly lifted his free hand, turning it so he could gaze at his palm.

The sound of his and Touya’s laughter now softly echoed alongside his words. ‘It’s been years,’ he thought before he turned to glance at you, but ended up flinching when he realized you were already looking at him.

“Are you okay?” you questioned, now that everything was off his chest he should be, right? Then again, you have been wrong before. Natsuo almost seemed to be in a trace, though his eyes hadn’t left yours and his hand remained lifted in the air.

‘Would I even know how to control it? I can’t risk hurting Y/n but if this proves how thankful I am to them then…’ he finally seemed to make a choice and he slowly turned on his side causing the bed to shake along with his movements.

“Can I see your other hand for a moment?” he questioned, knowing that if anything did happen to go wrong with his quirk that he could use the basic knowledge he learned from his medical welfare classes to hopefully undo any damage.

“Hm?” you seemed a tad confused by his request and why he was holding his hand up, but once more you reminded yourself that Natsuo had no ill intentions. You maneuvered yourself on your side much like him and slowly held your free hand out.

Natsuo smiled and carefully connected your fingertips, then he took a deep breath. Channeling his long-forgotten quirk to the center of his palm, though he could feel the cold rush. It came as a surprise to you. In fact, the sudden drastic drop in temperature coming from Natsuo's hand was an utter shock.

Even knowing quirks existed, this almost seemed impossible. “N-Natsuo?” you worried something was very wrong when you felt it, the cold rough texture of tiny ice crystals growing across your skin. You almost wanted to pull away as there came a slight pulsing pain with the bitter coldness that was Natsuo's quirk.

But instead, you looked to your hand, your jaw was clasped closed and your eyes were wide. Too focused on those ice crystals that continued to grow and slowly frost over the top of your fingers. You stared in amazement.

“I...b-but you…” your words were all jumbled together and you almost missed the fact that Natsuo’s palm was covered in a thick lining of ice and how red the skin surrounding it was. Still, even if this brought him some minor discomfort.

He couldn’t help but smile as he watched your reaction, the small feeling of heartache numb for the moment and replaced with a small dose of happiness. Partly due to you and partly because he was relieved he could in fact control his quirk even after years of refusing to use it.

“I just wanted to say thank you for being there for me,” he stated and though still astonished, you glanced back at him. Even though the small mishaps would more than likely continue to happen as well as people that would attempt to use him for their own personal benefits. You somehow knew he was going to be just fine.

#natsuo x reader #bnha x reader #todoroki natsuo

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blacksunscorpio · 3 years

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Hey, I'm so happy that I found your blog, your work and dedication are superb, you are such a special human being for helping some many people with their inquiries ❤ I don't know if you had already talked about this but I'd be curious to see your opinion on Pisces descendent

Ascendant/Descendant Axis

In the natal chart, there is an intersection of the Ascendant (Asc)- Descendant (Dsc). These are located in the 1st house and the 7th House. Also known as one of the two “angles” of the chart. They are both Cardinal by nature.

Your ascendant is the mask your wear to the world. Your “face”, essentially. It’s how you project yourself and even how you appear physically/your aesthetic. Like a mirror to the Ascendant, the Descendant reveals the qualities we would like to reflect and project into others. It describes how we feel attracted to other people as well as the traits we also have, but which need to be developed within the self or through relationships. The following can help illustrate the magnetic parallel between the two points and how they reflect yourself vs your relationships.

Aries Ascendant /Libra Descendant

In tight partnerships, one is preoccupied mostly with personal image and can often take the blame if a relationship does not work out. This native often asserts their independence. They prefer to get their own way, and if they don’t there can be displays of anger. Too much pressure for relationship outcomes to go their way can cause disharmony. They want their partner to consider their needs but often, the same is not reciprocated. If a relationship does not maintain their interest, they can move on to the next without a second thought. They need stimulation to keep their interest. This is because they seek excitement. Boredom feels physically painful. They tend to attract partners who let them make the decisions. This can be good because they like taking charge but bad because they don’t care for codependency. They often favor relationships where the partner has some level of independence. They admire strength and integrity. To maintain balanced relationships you must learn to be less self-centered, more sharing, and more considerate of your partner’s needs; then your relationships will be balanced and rewarding.

Libra Ascendant / Aries Descendant

You need to share your life with others in a peaceful and harmonious way but in marriage and other close relationships, you are being taught to stand up for yourself because you can feel dominated by the strength of your partner or other people’s characters. People with this placement often think “I want my needs met but I’m not sure how to do it without rocking the boat or stepping on toes.”

Fuck their toes. You need to learn to become independent and make your own decisions. The good news is, more often than not this will be exercised and learned by proxy via your partner and others. If the lesson to become independent is not learned, the fear of being dominated in close friendships, relationships, and marriage can become self-fulfilling prophecies. If relationships become unbalanced or a sense of diplomacy is not recognized, these natives often do everything in their power to restore said sense of equilibrium and harmony. Take care not to keep going back to unhealthy or toxic relationships because of your deep need to keep the peace. Setting a hard line is integral to keeping you safe from abusers/or relationships where you’re being run rough-shod on.

Taurus Ascendant / Scorpio Descendant

From a very early age, one with this placement might find that others aren’t as forthright as they should be with them. On one hand, their loved ones can show gestures that make these natives feel deeply appreciated but on the other hand, they can feel nebulous over other acts that challenge their sense of security and trust. Native’s are passionate and feel deeply especially once they do fall in love. Depth is something they easily comprehend however, jealousy and/or possessiveness can make them deeply insecure. You have a strong desire to develop your personal resources in order to contribute to close relationships, and you will work very hard to achieve security in any close partnership. They’ll do their best to be supportive of those they love but their sense of stability can be overtaken in the two-way pull of other people’s interests. Lovers who are co-dependent may try to tighten their hold on you when they sense any sign of retreat or independence. This can lead to unhealthy power struggles, manipulation, or a “push-pull” dynamic that can become very unhealthy and at its worst, dangerous. It's imperative to know that you can love and trust. Once this is accomplished, one with this placement can experience and enjoy deep, intense relationships that are at the same time, stable and lasting.

Scorpio Ascendant / Taurus Descendant

With this placement, natives play to your strengths to diminish weaknesses. They do their best to not use their powers for destructive ends. In relationships, they deeply care for others and will often try to provide for their lovers but this can lead to either their partners being co-dependent and too reliant or they can rely on other people which can deplete inner resources. You are likely incredibly influential among your peers- and it’s important that you pull away from the urges to use this for your own material gain exclusively. They are in a constant state of evolution and learning. They are never the same person over long periods of time which can cause lovers to not evolve with them. Trust issues live here. They often shield themselves from their emotions but they will care deeply for the emotions of others. They need to take care not to swing too far one way or the other because they can go to extremes. Shut people out and be unable to relate or overextending themselves. There’s a powerful presence than sort of emanates off of you but that can also cause you to draw in leeches who leave you feeling hurt. You can also have issues with jealousy and possessiveness when you do fall deeply. If you unite your resources equally with your partner and others, then you can have deeply rewarding relationships.

Cancer Ascendant /Capricorn Descendant

This placement requires emotional stability through harmonious family relationships. Quite protective of those you love but in your attempt to protect those you love- they can, by proxy, control you. The partners you attract can be very executive, business-minded, and ambitious. If the proper boundaries aren’t set, they can feel trapped in domestic day-to-day while your lover is out pursuing their own interests. If marriage occurs, they will do their best to nurture it to the best of their ability. They want success in love. They want security in love. There’s a strong need to keep the family close and thick as thieves. Sometimes this even involves sacrificing their own happiness. They may face issues of security and control in their immediate and extended familial ties, included but not limited to their partner’s family or closely associated family connections. It’s important to find balance. You can’t be everything to everyone all the time. If you nurture and care for your family and build your future security with your partner and family, then you will have enduring and long-lasting relationships.

Capricorn Ascendant / Cancer Descendant

Family values are paramount to those with this placement. They’ll base the way they approach said relationships on family conditioning. Look to their relationships with their family for a good look at how they’ll treat you. Your partner may find it difficult to get along with family members which can make things tense...even awkward. You might find yourself the one trying to keep the peace and understand everyone’s feelings. Law and order sort of come in here. At least in your approach to family and relationships. The influences of your partner’s early childhood can have an emotional effect on your relationship with him/her which can leave you trying to keep control in otherwise uncontrollable situations. Often this native will look to their partner to gain support in the familial sense. This works because they have a practical, logical approach to life. Their relationships will mimmick this. If you’re looking to soften your approach, your partner can help you with this as they will typically be the nurturing type. Conflicts in your relationship with your partner can arise when love and affection are denied through family conditioning. Break those chains/generational curses. It only takes one person to change lifetimes of habitual toxicity. The welfare of your relationships should not revolve around confining and limiting rules and regulations. Matters of emotional security and family control will have to be balanced. If you find the balance, love will endure through the difficult times in life. For better or worse, richer or for poorer.

Gemini Ascendant / Sagittarius Descendant

From an early age, Intellectual exchange is paramount. However, approaching the opposite sex might not have been an easy feat. You like to know the very fine detail of your interpersonal relationships. The inner workings and minutiae. Why? Because dialog is important to you. Both Gemini and Sag like to talk. Use their minds. The lower and the higher. This is displayed in relationships. Intellect and reason are utilized when one with this placement faces relationship problems, but with your own freedom in mind. You put a lot of thought into resolving relationship issues. Words are important to you and you operate on that frequency, so those who stimulate your mind are among your favorite to interact with. But your zealous approach to defending your points may come off as dogmatic. You tend to judge situations and give your opinion spontaneously which can lead to hastiness in others’ reactions towards you. Your nature is to sort out problems through gaining as much information as you can in order to reach intelligent conclusions. However, too much mental sparring can lead to hard feelings between you and your lover if things are left to go overboard. Here lives a sapiosexual. One who is turned on my knowledge and intelligence. A fair soul lives here. Or at least, one who strives to be. It’s imperative to look beyond your own opinions and give credit to others' opinions, then you will have balanced and rewarding relationships.

Sagittarius Ascendant / Gemini Descendant

Being confined is not your forte. In fact, you refuse to be. By anyone. The free spirit of Mercury and the expansion mindedness of Jupiter are living together here. This is the type of person that may often do the “Irish Exit” at a social event. Your partnerships often being mental. Through dialogue and interaction on a thoughtful level. However at times due to Jupiter’s penchant for excessiveness, your opinion can dominant conversations which can leave your partner feeling resentful. Your nature is fire. And just as your relationships are lively, dramatic, and exciting, the confrontations can be as well. Appreciations for others' opinions and ideas from an objective place can salvage relationships when fights and dogma ruffle feathers. Not everything is a personal attack. Take care not to jump to conclusions as this placement has a tendency to do so. Preachiness when not monitored can turn partners/friends off. Expect a “tell it like it is” approach here. Sometimes the native can be so strong-minded tact is often forgotten. Relationships are strongest when one remains free-spirited, optimistic, and understanding. When the mind is satiated and free thought is encouraged, your relationships will prosper.

Leo Ascendant / Aquarius Descendant

The kind of love this native thrives on is all-encompassing. They want to feel adored but affection can also take a more detached vibe. There’s a deep warmth to you and your love for people in general, the collective, and beyond is hard to miss. one with this placement may know many people. Get along with many and have a large social network. Your partner may be starkly different in that sense. They may have a completely different social circle. At times you may feel your light doesn’t shine. You can be the one to take initiative and set plans between you and those you love. You often have to operate on your partner’s wavelength to understand their thoughts or get yours across. Though it’s almost second nature for you to befriend people, only the meaningful and worthwhile connections are save for your partner to be witness to. Your partner is more detached than you so it can frustrate you when you've seen as the type to put on a show by them. They will opt to walk away and not engage in conflict to keep the peace. When you were young, you had a vision of all-consuming love, but you may feel life has dealt you a raw deal, often giving you the opposite of what you crave. However, if you find the balance in friendship and love, your partner can be your best friend and everything you could wish for.

Aquarius Ascendant / Leo Descendant

You look at life through a kaleidoscope lens. Nothing is black and white to you. You give free thought and entertain multiple perspectives and enjoy engaging with others who do the same. You like to look at everything from different angles. You need the freedom to pursue your own community interests and goals outside your relationships, but this can lead to difficulties within your relationships. Though you can understand and identify with emotion, you do not live in this space. Your emotions are detached and you see everything from an objective point of view. Your amiable manner attracts large groups of people but your partner may try to get you to be more emotional. This is something you’re not readily comfortable with. Be careful because they can take your desire for space as disinterest. They can mistake your free-loving nature for abandonment. Balance is needed in regard to your partner's interests and yours, otherwise, relationships may feel unlively and lackluster. You’ll be craving something else or more excitement. However, you’ll be very loyal as long as your partner respects the fact that emotional displays and dramatics will have the adverse effect they’re seeking. Keep it real. And don’t forget to sympathize.

Virgo Ascendant / Pisces Descendant

In love and partnerships, you may see the “idealized” version you've created for others rather than the reality of them. This includes but is not limited to, placing them on pedestals, or pinning fantasies on them that they may not live up to. This can cause you to feel disillusioned if balance isn’t met. Be compassionate with yourself just as you are compassionate and sensitive in your personal life. Health and/or work issues or issues having very much to do with the 6th house may present themselves in the love life. You have a natural penchant to set very high and at times impossible standards for yourself. You also love to set a pristine environment for your lover or those you love in general. You love to organize which your partner will appreciate. Partners may show your love by giving you creative gifts or even serenading you. You may even attract an occasional crooner/musician/artist. High expectations are natural for you to have in relationships- so much so that if the object of your affections doesn’t meet them, you can criticize them. However because you are service and work minded, you’ll often stay dedicated to your relationships. Your life is one of service. You may often have a savior complex or others may perceive you as someone who can “rescue” them. You attract the down-and-out types. An underdog. Take care not to allow yourself to be the martyr as you often put others’ needs ahead of your own. Do not allow this to go too far or else sentiments of resentment and being “taken advantage” of may rear their heads. If you stay organized and learn to be realistic in how you demonstrate and expect to receive love, setting firm boundaries while being compassionate as well, your relationships will thrive and stay on the healthy road.

Pisces Ascendant / Virgo Descendant

Your personality can be malleable due to your mutable nature. Sometimes you’ll chameleonize yourself to fit the mold your loved ones want you to fit. This placement can make one impressionable or there can be a mysterious vibe here. However, your interests at work can match those you fall for. Idealism is your strong suit. On the other hand, more often than not, your partner may be a realist and quite diligent at work. You are extremely empathetic, almost to a psychic degree. This is typically why people are drawn to you. You have an uncanny knack for making others feel like individuals. As if they are special. Take care not to try to be everything to everyone or you’ll end up raining your energy stores. Being an idealist, you prefer to avoid conflict as you are more passive by nature. Arguments and beef give you anxiety. Just remember that a practical approach is necessary otherwise you can find yourself jaded. Things can be confusing to you sometimes and you can have a hard time making sense of things because Neptune which dissolves is on your rising. Your out of the box and otherworldly thinking can break down the most regimented person and new solutions can bring harmony and love into your relationships. Natives with this placement need to take care not to allow others to define them. Be your own person. As a result, your relationships will bear healthy fruit.

Nadir/Midheaven Axis in Astrology

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xaibaugrove · 3 years

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Addressing the Casual (and Direct) Biphobia in the Korrasami Community

So this will either get a lot of flak or fade into obscurity. I am a member of the Korrasami community who has not been here for nearly as long as the more notable members and I am not very active to say the least. But this platform gives me the ability to speak my mind and after letting this topic fester within me for as long as I’ve been in this community, I am going to speak my damn mind because this shit needs to be said.

The Backstory

I won’t bore anyone with my whole confused bisexual life story, because this isn’t about me. But just for some background here, I was a confused bisexual for my entire life until Korra and Asami basking in the light of the Spirit Portal made me see the actual light and recognize my sexuality. Which was a little crazy for me to realize that, yeah, there is a way to be attracted to men and still be attracted to women.

I saw so much of myself in Korra. She was super awkward around guys she thought were cute, she was buff, she was tough and sometimes she just blurted out all her deep seated feelings towards guys she just met and you know, I felt that. She also fell in love with her female best friend and I felt that, too. Naturally after rewatching the series as an adult, I wanted to see if there were others out there who appreciated this couple as much as I did.

The Issue

While I found a vast online community that had as much love for Korrasami as I did, I quickly found that there were a large majority of lesbian/WLW fans who didn’t have as much love for Korra and Asami’s very real attraction to Mako.

Take a look at the Korrasami AO3 tag. I’ve actually had someone tell me that no one who reads Korrasami fanfic wants to read anything featuring Korra or Asami with Mako. I’ve seen fics that have a timeline that starts with both women being toddlers growing up into adults without one single mention of them being attracted to boys or men at all, nonetheless attracted to Mako. And in the rare scenario that a relationship with Mako or any male is mentioned, then comes the frustrating storybeat that they either dated men because they were too shy/scared to approach each other (thus rendering the men as just things to do in the meantime) or worse yet, because they were CONFUSED OR CONFORMING TO SOCIAL/GENDER NORMS.

In the 3 or 4 years I’ve been part of the fandom, I’ve had actual conversations with lesbian friends who have found every way possible to wave away Korra and Asami’s attraction to Mako. Or even reacting in disgust to Makorra or Masami at every mention of it. Which is fair, if you’re a KA fan of course that’s an expected reaction to another ship involving your OTP but, to completely dismiss the importance of it...? There are those who would call those parts of the series “pointless” or “ridiculous”. It’s really disheartening to know that a lot of lesbian KA fans consider the queer rep in the series soured by the 2 seasons where they had to watch Korra and Asami, two bi women, be attracted to a man.

It was jarring to say the least, to have conversations with friends where I couldn’t bring up Korra or Asami’s relationships with Mako during discussions about their development without being shot down and having the relationships be dismissed. The reaction to Korra and Asami’s attraction to men was so strong that I even started to feel ashamed about how “frivolous” or “trivial” my own attraction to men was perceived.

Not too long ago, I saw a meme on Reddit that sent me over the edge and inspired me to write this post. The user has since deleted the post, but I remember it very vividly, only because I’ve seen some version of it many times before. The meme basically referred to how frustrated the viewer had been after being told that TLOK had great queer rep, but feeling as though they were cheated having to watch them “fuck around with guys for 2 seasons” (their words), only to be saved at the end, when Korra and Asami finally get together.

When I saw it, I was immediately fuming. Because at that point, I had seen this shit so much, it hurt more than anything else. And the pain mixed with the rage but...I think the pain still comes through in my reply to the post.

I’ve seen sooo much content and sooo many posts or comments where a user asks whether TLOK has good LGBTQ+ rep, only to have someone reply that it’s a letdown because the queer rep doesn’t happen until the finale. Another all too common discussion I’ve seen is where fans call Korra and Asam’s bisexuality into question. One example

I understand that it sucks that we didn’t get more romantic interactions between the two women during the show for external reasons outside the creators’ control. I wish there had been a kiss here, more blushes there. But the crushes on Mako were real. And their interest in each other, albeit all too short in its depiction, is also real. And that means something to me, a bisexual woman. To say the rep is a letdown is...sad. Because Korra is featured in every episode starting from the first and Asami is featured in every ep from the 4th or 5th episode. And they’re both wonderfully, beautifully bisexual. Seeing that mattered to me.

So, to anyone who is a lesbian or WLW and a Korrasami fan and you’re reading this post and feel attacked, just stop instead to examine your language within the fandom. I understand you want “pure” WLW content or whatever... but just stop making me feel ashamed for being a wlw who is also attracted to men... and please stop erasing that attraction from two of the few bisexual characters I have that are like me... I’m tired, so tired of having to defend my attraction to both sexes with people outside the LGBTQ+ community and those within it.

#don't even get me started on the other aspect of bi erasure in the community #such as...labeling Korra and Asami as lesbians....#that's a story for another post #korra #asami sato #korrasami #avatar: tlok #the legend of korra #tlok #bisexual awareness #bisexual #bi representation #wlw #bi erasure #lgbtq+#lgbtqia representation #discourse

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lizzybeth1986 · 3 years

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Hi! I was reading your Hana essay and in one section you implied that you disliked that people considered some Choices LIs to be player-sexual; can you elaborate on why you dislike that term? I myself thought that LIs in gender-choice books and gender customizable LIs were player-sexual unless explicitly bi (like Emma) because of the way that PB tends to write romances as straight and avoid discussing queerness, but hey, maybe I could be wrong or I'm missing some important nuances. Enlighten me?

(To learn more about the term "mechanical bisexuality", I highly recommend this fantastic video essay by verilybitchie. In the context of this post, the anon's ask stemmed from an essay on Hana I wrote titled "Protagonist Centered Sexuality")

That's an interesting question, and perhaps if someone is new to the fandom itself (not necessarily you anon - since idk how long you've been around - but newcomers who use "playersexual" to indicate the dynamics of a game that often uses the "mechanical bisexuality" model) the pushback to the term itself might sound baffling. While "playersexual" itself may be considered harmless as a term (esp since the mechanical bisexuality model itself places the burden of generating any discussion on sexuality in-game, on the player), the history of how it's been used in fandom is a thorny, bitter one.

Your framing of it in the ask acknowledges that the root of it all is PB wanting "to avoid discussions of queerness", and I think that's as good a start as any. There is a distinct discomfort in discussing queerness and a strong leaning towards straightness in the way PB plans and writes these characters, especially their favourite ones. They do seem to make more of an effort sometimes for an audience that is uncomfortable with queer relationships or expressions of love, while still making a song and dance out of their "inclusiveness and diversity". What does that result in? LGBTQ+ players often letting go of the game in frustration. Who may get attracted to such content? Players who may feel emboldened to put their discomfort with gay/bi/pan/ace/queer characters and relationships on blast. And there have been plenty of the latter in this fandom's history.

This was especially obvious with very popular male LIs. For instance, even the suggestion that someone considered Jake or Damien bisexual would elicit a strong reaction, and the term "playersexual" was often a front for taking offense at the character being called bi at all.

We would also see this term bandied about even before you could find canonical evidence of their bisexuality. For instance, try to remember when Emma was established as bi? More than halfway through the third book of HSS. Even Damien, whose ex mentioned partners rather than girlfriend/boyfriend and who fanboy-ed over Matt Rodriguez every bit as much as his sisters did ("who do you think suggested the tent?") got these indications much later on, and until then players who were aware that the story was still ongoing and that they didn't know much about the characters yet, would still insist on using "playersexual" to describe the character's sexuality, and continue to do so even after these hints of their sexuality (as in the case of Damien) were given. We may agree or disagree on this, but a lot of the "playersexual" takes I did read at the time reeked of biphobia and a distinct discomfort at the possibility of a favourite LI being bi.

Allow me to briefly pivot to irl for a bit. Bisexual life experiences can come in many ways and forms. Some have an open history of relationships with both/all sexes, some have a history relationships with just one but are aware of their attraction to other sexes - and their bisexuality is just as valid. Unfortunately, if someone of the latter category has more of a history of relationships with the opposite sex and identifies as bi, they tend to face bi erasure as well - they are often disbelieved, scoffed at, accused of lying - their identity constantly questioned. I am a bisexual woman who often faced that kind of erasure, from straight and gay people alike, and it is quite an alienating experience. So of course that history, too, is going to colour the way I view these discourses - and a lot of the playersexual discourse in the past has read as desparate attempts to erase even the possibility of a character being bi, to me.

PB also has strengthened it's leanings towards mechanical bisexuality in recent years. For instance, coding the gender of an LI's ex/other partners to the gender customizable MC (the person Dallas loved in BSC, or Sora and the person Ethan and Tobias fought over in OH) wasn't this intense earlier, and it leads to a situation where the characters involved can only be viewed as queer IF the player makes those choices. And while we can never be sure whether this is directly related to the playersexual discourse, we cannot deny that PB often pays silent attention to arguments here and elsewhere, and they often make decisions based on what they think will make their core audience comfortable.

Sadly, it really is a case of PB pandering to the audience that's not comfortable with discussions of queerness while still trying to get money and clout from queer players, and that can lead to an environment where "playersexual" can become shorthand for "I'm biphobic".

#ask me #ask lizzy #choices fandom #discussions on mechanical bisexuality #bisexuality #being bisexual

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patandpran · 3 years

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The Taekyung Effect

Summary: A character study from Shinwoo's perspective on how his feelings developed for Taekyung and his internal conflict about whether to reveal his feelings or not.

How could Shinwoo find this awkward, overly blunt and honest, try-hard so hard to ignore?

But that was just it. It was as if Shinwoo’s mind had already made up his opinion of Taekyung before he could even rationalize the thought. His pull toward Taekyung was so immediate that it turned him into a bumbling idiot from their very first (rather unfortunate) interaction.

When Taekyung had showed up in the student council room, Shinwoo wondered for a moment if had slept past his alarm that morning and was still fast asleep in bed. It just felt so implausible. And yet, there Taekyung was.

Shinwoo had barely participated in a full conversation with Taekyung and he already wanted to know everything about him, despite the act he put on. The resistance and wall that Shinwoo threw up between them was for both of their sakes. He didn’t know Taekyung well enough to trust him yet and Shinwoo sure didn’t trust himself not to let his guard down considering the feelings that were already brewing inside him.

Whenever his eyes landed on Taekyung, it was like his chest caught on fire and he had a hard time catching his breath. The effect was so immediate it was almost blinding so Shinwoo had to rely on his defense mechanism to keep Taekyung at arms length.

But that didn’t even keep Taekyung away.

The more resistance that Shinwoo put up, the more that Taekyung tried to break down his walls. The fascinating thing about Taekyung was that he clearly had a difficult time navigating social cues and dealing with lack of clarity so he couldn’t help but push and push and push to build sense into his every interaction.

….So by trying to push Taekyung away, Shinwoo was really pulling him even closer.

Every time that Shinwoo was faced with Taekyung, he was surprised by how unpredictable Taekyung was. It was part of why Shinwoo was so drawn to him. There was no fakeness about Taekyung, he was meaningfully authentic. Every thought, worry, idea that passed through Taekyung’s mind was shared if it seemed relevant enough. No question remained unanswered and even though that didn’t always work out in Shinwoo’s favor, he found that quality in Taekyung incredibly refreshing.

It brought a sense of balance to their group. Daon was the president and people pleaser who would rather say ‘yes’ to everything than disappoint even one person. Shiwoon was the class clown who could bring positivity into the most tense situations while knowing everything about everyone. And finally, there was Shinwoo, the quiet one who made the hard decisions, made sure everyone stayed on track with their tasks and didn’t take ‘no’ for an answer (all while hiding how he actually feels under the surface).

Enter Taekyung and everything felt different.

But it was for the better. After Taekyung commented on how Daon seemed to be overscheduling himself because he couldn’t refuse people’s requests, Daon actually started to turn people down. When Taekyung asked why Shiwoon always needed to be on his phone when they were supposed to be accomplishing things for the council, Shiwoon started to pocket his cell as soon as he walked into the council room. Taekyung’s obsessive inquiry into why Shinwoo ‘hated’ him slowly made Shinwoo more and more comfortable with letting Taekyung into his world.

The dinner with Mr. Seo really solidified that in Shinwoo’s eyes. He felt himself smiling and relaxing for the first time in weeks and he couldn’t help but attribute that to Taekyung’s influence and presence.

Even if things weren’t entirely clear between them. Even if Daon and Taekyung’s closeness ignited jealousy in Shinwoo that made him wish he was as brave as Taekyung to ask him how he felt about Daon… There was still a sense of completeness between the four of them that had arrived when Taekyung arrived in the council room.

The thing between Daon and Taekyung didn’t shock Shinwoo but he wasn’t exactly a fan of it either. It wasn’t Daon’s fault that he oozed charm and was the epitome of kindness. Nobody could seem to be strong enough to escape the pull of Daon and, for some reason, Daon seemed to like having Taekyung tucked close under his wing. Shinwoo figured it was because, 1: Daon loved how honest Taekyung was, and, 2: Taekyung was undeniably adorable.

The latter reason was a recent discovery of Shinwoo’s.

Because their interactions had been so hostile up until recently, and because Shinwoo was always on high alert when Taekyung was within a close vicinity, Shinwoo had not allowed himself to really examine Taekyung closely or question what was so different and distinct about him.

Taekyung had an inquisitive stare that was hard to decipher. Shinwoo wondered if he intentionally masked his emotions or had learned over time to read people and gather the ‘appropriate’ reaction before displaying how he felt physically. Shinwoo had an innate sense that social situations made Taekyung overwhelmed and often just left him confused. But Taekyung also had the tools, if he wanted to put in the effort, to be able to focus enough to engage in social interactions.

Shinwoo figured this must be an exhausting endeavor for Taekyung, though, which is why he had isolated himself for so long. Shinwoo could relate to this as he was an introvert himself. If he was around too many people for too long, he often needed to distance himself from the situation to re-charge or feel like himself again. He sometimes found it difficult to be in the student council room when Daon and Shiwoon were blabbing away loudly so he was thankful that Taekyung seemed to be drained by socialization as well.

But the side of Taekyung that Shinwoo savoured the most was his soft smile. Taekyung’s smile never showed his lips, it appeared slowly and surely, tugging at the edges of his mouth until it formed into a recognizable grin. It was never forced and, because of his innate honesty, his smiles were always authentic. Their appearance brought something to the surface that both terrified and comforted Shinwoo.

There was also something undeniably otherworldly about the way that Taekyung looked, as if he had stepped out of the pages of a fairy tale or came from a land far away. Shinwoo knew it was a ridiculous thought but he couldn’t help but wonder where Taekyung had appeared from, as if he was a figment of someone’s vivid imagination.

And yet, that was the best part. Taekyung was real and tangible.

Although there was a part of Shinwoo worried that their friendship was so fragile, as if it could slip between his fingers and shatter into a million precious pieces. He would try desperately to gather them all up despite the pain and crimson that would spring from his fingertips to save whatever shreds he could.

But the truth of how Taekyung made Shinwoo feel would do just that: ruin everything.

So, Shinwoo had to stay silent.

Not only for his sake, but for the sake of the group. He knew what it was like to be ostracized for being different. History seemed to be repeating itself as feelings that reminded him of middle school were bubbling to the surface.

Shinwoo had been able to muffle that part of himself for so long, refusing to let himself feel anything other than platonic friendship for anyone. He had boxed that part of him away into a dark and shadowy corner of his mind and besides his middle school friends showing up out of the blue to harass him the other day, he had refused to acknowledge that part of him even existed.

But, of course, Taekyung yanked this part of Shinwoo to the forefront. The effect was visceral and undeniable. Shinwoo couldn’t ignore his attraction and feelings for Taekyung even if he wanted to. The panic that surged through him, which slowly settled into a warm sense of rightness whenever he was around Taekyung confirmed Shinwoo’s worst fears.

He had fought so long and so hard to silence this part of himself, to bury it and pretend it didn’t exist… and yet, somehow, being around Taekyung made a part of Shinwoo wonder if he should take a risk and be brave and honest for once about how he felt. Taekyung was the epitome of honesty and every song that Shinwoo spent with him convinced him that honesty was a much healthier way to live your life than suffocating a part of himself.

But what if the same thing happened as the first time? What if Shinwoo convinced himself that someone felt the same way and that he could trust that person with the truth? What if he went out on a limb and exposed his feelings, only to be violently rejected, mocked and shunned by the entire student body? What if the bullying got so bad that he didn’t want to go to school anymore and begged his parents to send him to a new one?

What if… what if… what if…

The ‘what ifs’ were what kept Shinwoo silent and as much as he wanted to think Taekyung and the other members of the student council were different, the reality was that Shinwoo would rather keep things hidden to keep their foursome together. He couldn’t lose his friends, not for a stupid crush.

But Shinwoo knew his feelings for Taekyung ran deeper than that.

It was as if Taekyung had infiltrated Shinwoo’s every breath and thought. Whenever Taekyung wasn’t around, Shinwoo was wondering what he was doing and what their next interaction might look like. Would Taekyung smile around him again? What did Shinwoo have to do to make sure that happened? Because there wasn’t anything better than Taekyung’s smile.

And this was where he was left; Shinwoo was at a crossroads with no sure path to take. He was helpless to his feelings and the effect that Taekyung had on him, as much as he tried to keep them at bay. He knew it would be better for them to be friends but every second they spent together just convinced Shinwoo of how special Taekyung was and made him fall harder.

But he couldn’t surrender to his feelings or let them be seen by anyone. He could be the victim in secret but he couldn’t reveal how he felt about Taekyung. To make sure of this, Taekyung made sure that the two of them were ever alone and always made a point of pretending to be involved in his work or on his phone whenever he had to witness Daon and Taekyung interact.

Because Shinwoo knew he had no right to be jealous. He had no claim over Taekyung and he had no right to control the nature of their friendship or whatever else might develop between Taekyung and Daon. If anything did, he would have to swallow the pain and shower them with all the support in the world, swallowing any sense of regret and putting it in the same place with his quieted feelings.

Being close to Taekyung was enough. Being Taekyung’s friend was enough. It had to be.

….No matter the effect that Taekyung had on Shinwoo.

#light on me #shinwoo x taekyung #korean bl #korean drama #kdrama

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all-about-seggs · 3 years

Text

Gojo Satoru Relationship headcanons -

Satoru is a guy who have many different sides to him so he's definitely a catch.

(P.s LOOk at his Lips)

His type of s!o :

💜 Many people consider him attractive and he knows it but that's not a criteria he considers when it comes to love.

💜I can see him being attracted to someone who can stand up for themselves or atleast be independent. He's not someone wholl be able to entertain a clingy s!o for a long time because of his work and the goals he has set for himself, so relationships are already in the backburner for him.

💜Would be a plus is you have a sassy/ sarcastic side. He LOVES friendly banters and back and forths, Satoru's a tease and he'll let you know that form the start.

💜Someone who tries to pry or force him to tell something that he doesn't want to is gonna be a difficult match for him. He may love you but he wants his space as well.

Catching feelings :

💜He has to be really in love to pursue a relationship with you because of all the danger that comes form him job he'll try not to get too involved with you if his feelings are not that strong or if there is no initiative from your side.

💜Years of training has made him become the master of his own emotions so if you don't want to let him slip through your hands you better act first. He'll probably tell himself to forget about his growing Love for you and might try nonchalantly refusing to meet you by making work an excuse.

💜If you decide to work for it and the time is right, he'll tell you in the most casual tone that he is in love with you. Tbh I think he'll definetly refrain from using the word love( even tho he feels it) since it's a very heavy term for him.

💜It's not because he has commitment issues, it's just that he finds it better to keep it solo. It's easier to overthrow the sorcerer's higher ups committee when he doesn't have anything to lose even if things go downhill.

💜In the end, it'll be your persistence that makes the relationship happen. And he'll secretly thank you everyday for sticking with him:).

The start :

💜 The type of boyfriend who shows his affection by teasing you. Whether it is by finding your tickle spots or by his words, he'll find every tiny pet peeves you have and use them strategically to annoy you.

💜 He would make the most sickeningly innocent puppy dog face afterwards that'll make you reconsider wopping his ass.

💜 Satoru's playful, flirty and annoying when things are going good and there is no death threats looming over the both of you.

💜 Makes indecent sexual innuendos at random intervals during the entire day( a bonus if you're easily flustered bc then he JuST WOnT STop).

💜 He is talkative when he wants to be and with you he can talk about almost anything, the new movies he watched, cafes he saw while slacking off at work, some sweets or snacks that you should try. He's a chatterbox and can keep any sort of conversation going.

💜 Satoru prefers to keep things light so he won't talk about his work all that often. If you ask, he'll just keep it to all the funny embarrassing stories of his students but that's the extent to it.

💜 It's not because he doesn't trust you, it's his own sense of responsibility towards you that makes him want to protect you from his dangerous lifestyle. You know what you were up for before entering in a relationship with him and that's exactly why he wants to make you happy by keeping you in the light.

💜 Although Satoru seems like the tough love kinda guy, he's occasionally soft for you. So expect a bit of coddling at the beginning atleast. He'll eventually tell you all about the Jujutsu world if you're just a civilian and the other things that you're not aware of.

💜 Probably tries to act cool and flex a little when you're with him and his students. Megumi gets exasperated really quick because of his exaggerated reactions and cheesy talk( yep he is and he does it on purpose).

💜 Loves making his students uncomfortable with a extra amout of pda when you are around. Otherwise, he holds back on physical affection when you're outdoors, just to be on the safe side.

💜 Expect a lot of snacks and sweets as souvenirs whenever he goes on his ' business trips' (he never goes into details about where he's going tho).

💜 Movie nights are a given everytime you get together on a weekend. He loves watching those dark movies where the main character gets an untimely and gruesome death or just straight up trashy horror movies that serves as a comic relief ( He never stops chatting during these but you don't stop him cuz his comments are just too funny).

💜 He's dramatic and goofy everytime you go on dates and tries to pull cringey pick up lines just to make you laugh but you know how much of a smooth talker he can be. Tho he'll never stop calling you dessert based nicknames (the guy's got a sweet tooth afterall).

💜 May have tried to make you jealous on purpose by reacting to a couple of girls that tried to hit on him. (Pls don't get actually angry he was just trying to see if you were the jealous type or not). If you are though, then boy does it inflat his ego or what. He'll tease you constantly about it.

💜 Usually doesn't plan dates he's more of an impromptu or just go with mood kinda guy. So your date spots are gonna be pretty random. But hey, the foods always good.

💜 Most of your dates are during the daytime cuz he's running his shady errands at night but when he's free during that time as well, he'll take you stargazing or someplace high with a good view and just relax.

💜 Overall Satoru is a pretty easygoing guy who both is casual and passionate in a relationship. As a naturally calm and level headed person he never steps out of line (atleast not on purpose). Fights are not a common occurrence between the two of you cuz he hates the thought of it. And even if in a situation where you are upset with him, he gives you space and talks it out whenever you are ready. He's a patient guy.

A/N: Hello! Thank you for reading this, I might make some changes in this later if i feel like I depicted him wrong cuz I've only seen the anime. If you have any ideas or suggestions of your own please leave a comment!

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk gojo #gojou satoru #gojo satoru #satoru #jjk headcanons #headcanons #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #fluff #ramblings

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frostops · 3 years

Text

I have some thoughts about how FGO has handled trans and trans-adjacent characters, and I’m frustrated how many people talk about the mishandlings without discussing the transmisogyny in it, but this is long as fuck, so its under the cut.

Its a good thing that FGO is having more characters with the genderless trait who aren’t given that trait for shitty reasons, but framing this as FGO being better at handling nonbinary characters, while technically true, ignores what caused many of the early issues. That cause is often transmisogyny.

Transmisogyny has been an issue in the game since Da Vinci’s introduction. Da Vinci doesn’t have the genderless trait, but she’s still important to discuss to understand FGO’s mishandling of trans characters. Mash and Romani are both angry at the idea of Leonardo Da Vinci not being a man, and call her a pervert, among other things. This is immediately after both find out King Arthur was actually a woman, but neither seemed to care then. Its understood by the writing that some believed to be a man turning out to actually be a cis woman isn’t deserving of malice, but that person turning out to be a trans woman is. The writing surrounding Da Vinci slowly got better, with characters being less shitty about and eventually respecting her gender. While Da Vinci initially describes herself as beyond gender, she says so in response to Roman and Mash’s reaction to her gender, where as whenever she is referred to as a woman (Lancelot saying he couldn’t hurt a beautiful women in Camelot, Napoleon calling her mademoiselle in LB2), she eats it up. Her early description of being beyond gender feels more like a tongue-in-cheek way of degendering a trans woman. While overall the writing treats Da Vinci better now, there are still times where it gets shitty, even as recent as the event where Van Gogh was introduced, where Hokusai talks about both Da Vinci and Van Gogh having an inherent maleness that bleeds into their art. This event did have a guest writer, but it was still allowed into the game.

The first character to have the genderless trait is D’Eon. Historically, D’Eon was intersex and trans feminine, and very likely a trans woman, but the fate version is introduced saying they were crazy in life, intended to be in reference to how they presented their gender. They are also presented as caring more about loyalty to France than what gender they are seen as, when the real D’Eon blackmailed the king into legally recognizing them as a woman. Transmisogyny, as well as intersexism, is pretty obviously what made Type-Moon take reduce D’Eon to just jokes about gender. D’Eon feels degendered in way similar to how Da Vinci is at time, though D’Eon gets it worse

Astolfo debuted in Apocrypha, where their presentation is used for a joke where Jeanne, believing Astolfo to be a girl, freaks out when she sees that Astolfo has a penis. The joke is that it is such a horrible thing to find a penis on some you think is a girl. I shouldn’t need to explain the transmisogyny behind that, or that Astolfo ostensibly not being a trans woman doesn’t make the joke less transmisogynistic. There are other, better things about Astolfo in Apocrypha, but most of their writing in FGO is in the same vein as the joke with Jeanne. This is crystalized in Agartha, where both Astolfo and D’Eon were used for many transmisogynistic, intersexist, and homophobic jokes.

The third, and for a long time last, character to have the genderless trait was Enkidu. They are given this trait due to changes to their myth. In Fate, Enkidu is made of clay, and had a nonhuman appearance until meeting Shamhat, and modeling their appearance after her. They don’t have a physical sex, but, due to originally being a male character and appearing feminine in fate, the writers and fans alike treat them similarly to how they treat Astolfo and D’Eon, though less aggressively. Usually when Enkidu appears in a fate work, one character has to talk about how they can’t tell whether Enkidu is a man or a woman, before settling on neither, but only reach that conclusion because they don’t have a physical sex. The transmisogyny isn’t as strong in Enkidu’s writing, but its still there.

Until LB3, no other character would be given the genderless trait, and what all 3 of them have in common is being AMAB or originally male characters who present femininely. Technically Da Vinci fits this description as well, but her body is considered female by Type-Moon’s standards, so she gets the female trait. Also, with the exception of Astolfo, have bodies that wouldn’t considered male of female by most people. In Deon’s case, this is the result of intersexism, and even more frustrating when you remember that D’Eon blackmailed the king to be seen as a woman. I’d wager the reason Astolfo is grouped with the other two is itself a continuation of the joke from Apocrypha. It’s a coy “We all know what Astolfo’s ‘real’ gender is, but we’ll play along with the joke.”

I think this also explains other characters who, arguably, could be included in the genderless trait, but were not. Nezha, like Da Vinci, only got a “female” body after dying, so they get the female trait too, despite not really being comfortable with any gender labels. Mordred, who consistently gets violently angry at being called a woman, and whose bio states that they don’t like being referred to as a man either (though this wouldn’t be implemented into writing until LB3, where they are clearly far less bothered by being referred to as man) also has the female trait. King Hassan’s bio has his gender listed as “?????” but he is treated as male by the game and has the male trait.

None of the newer genderless servants fit the same description of amab/originally male and presenting femininely, which does show a more nuanced understanding of gender identity and expression, but it doesn’t show anymore respect towards trans women and transfems. Both Shi Huang Di and Douman have somewhat androgynous presentations, but we still don’t really have trans fem character whose gender and presentation is treated respectfully other than Da Vinci, and that’s frustrating. For the most part, though, these characters are all pretty well handled.

Two of them, Mao Nobu and Romulus-Quirinus, are new versions of characters who already had the female and male trait respectively, meaning the game has at least someone moved away from equating the genderless trait to a character’s physical sex, but not entirely since part of the reason Shi Huang Di has the trait is their inability to reproduce.

There is some disagreement about how Caenis is handled, and I do have thoughts on that topic, but if I talked about that this would be twice as long. The short version is that the necessity to make characters fit into fanservice, something which negatively affects all of the characters I mention here, limits the ways in which Caenis’s relationship to their gender can be explored. Its also why we have Caenis and not Caenus, and why Caenis is rarely allowed to where a shirt.

There is also Dioscuri, who is two characters, one man and one woman, who are collectively on servant, so even though they have the genderless trait, they're not really relevant.

We do have more originally male characters now in female bodies. Vritra and Van Gogh, who were added recently (Vritra’s bio says she was originally male and now has a female vessel and Van Gogh is Vincent Van Gogh in Clytie’s body), Kama, an originally male deity possessing Sakura’s body, is being added to NA this year, and even back in part 1 we had Quetzalcoatl, another male god in a female vessel. All of them are given the female trait, and Quetz in particular seems to be very comfortable being a woman, but this still feels like what happened with Nezha, where the “physically female” body matters more than the identity of the character, especially with Van Gogh, who had no choice in being put in Clytie’s body.

Mechanically, the gender traits only affect certain skills and nps, having extra or stronger effects. The genderless servants are exempt from the extra effects, with one exception. Once of Blackbeard’s skills has an effect for female servants, but D’Eon and Astolfo (And maybe also Enkidu, but I don’t remember) were included in this effect as well. The joke here was that Blackbeard is written to be reflective of the worst qualities of weebs and otakus. many of whom would refer to those two as traps, a transmisogynistic slur, so Blackbeard is into them in the same way. Servants with the genderless trait added afterwards weren’t included in this effect, even though some of them (the ones who transphobic fate fans consider to be women) would still be seen as attractive by Blackbeard. So rather than coding each one individually to be included, they added a new trait, the female looking trait, for Blackbeard’s skill. The genderless servants included in this one all present feminine, but the inclusion of this trait is to make continuing a transphobic joke easier, which almost feels like a step back from some of the previous progress in handling trans characters.

I also think some people are a little too eager to give FGO credit when it may not deserve. For instance, a lot of people liked Douman being included in the genderless trait, and on its own it fine, but the my room line where Sei talks about trying to check under Douman’s robes concerns me. Many people took it as Sei just being horny for Douman, but it could easily be intended as Sei trying to check what’s really in his pants, especially since the canon reason Douman has the genderless trait is that he combined himself with some spirits and deities, one of which is female.

None of this is to say its wrong to view any of these characters as nonbinary (I do view most of them as nonbinary), but I don’t think we should view the genderless trait as equivalent to nonbinary. Not only are there characters included in it who probably shouldn’t be (like D’Eon) and characters who don’t have it who probably should (like Nezha), doing so treat nonbinary as a third and wholly separate gender. And if you’re going to talk about the transphobia of FGO, please be willing to use the word transmisogyny.

#transmisogyny #transphobia #fate grand order #fate/go

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obeiii-mee · 4 years

Note

Hi I hope you're fine! Can you make the reaction of the brothers to a Mc who managed to overtake Salomon and made 100 pacts, the 100 th being ... Diavolo himself ?! (idk if it is really possible) Thank you love on you

I don’t really know if it’s possible either but I gave it a go anyway! I love this concept tho because MC, being the powerhouse they are, now has absolute control of 100 demons one which is actual prince of hell. Idk why I find that funny tbh.

I hope you’re well too and that you enjoy reading these HCs!

————————————

The Brothers Reacting to MC who made 100 pacts:

Lucifer:

-*Surprised pikachu face*

-I’m sorry, w a t?

-Not only did an average human,with no magical capabilities whatsoever, beat a spectacular sorcerer in the span of just one year and managed to make 100 pacts before him

-But they also made a pact with Lord Diavolo as a grand finale??? (MC knows how to leave DevilDom with class holy shit)

-If you look closely enough, you can see Lucifer’s wheels spinning inside his head

-And here he thought you were going to get eaten in the first few days

-He needs to sit down for a few moments, his fucking logic has decided to take a walk

-He really went 0-0

-And on one hand, he’s totally impressed and actually very proud of their little exchange student

-But on the other hand, when tf did you have the time to make 100 pacts??

-You talked with at least 92 other demons and didn’t get murdered?

-Are all humans this hard to kill off or it just you?

-Taking aside his confusion and the way he worries like a middle aged parent, he’s actually pretty boastful about your situation

-Pride on another level, I’m telling you

- Pretty smug about it to Solomon too which is concerning because he isn’t really supposed to have favourites in the exchange program

-But he totally does

-“MC, you’re full of surprises aren’t you? You’re ability to adapt here is very impressive. Just don’t get too reckless, I don’t want you getting hurt.”

-Aw your tsundere and arrogant boyfriend actually really cares about your well being

Mammon:

-“But I’m still your first man, right?”

-Literally the first thing that leaves his mouth when he finds out

-Doesn’t matter how many pacts you make, he’s always going to insist he’s your first and therefore your best pact of them all

-He may freak out a bit at first because he doesn’t like the idea of you possibly chatting it up with other demons but he’s pretty chill

-Until you tell him about Lord Diavolo

-“Guess who just made a pact with Lord Diavolo!!”

-“Is it someone famous?”

-He’s a bit scared because the price you have to pay to be in a pact with Lord Diavolo is pretty damn high

-But if you keep insisting you will be fine, his worry will subside

-He’s a bit smug, like Lucifer, knowing you beat a powerful sorcerer in a non existent contest that he just made up in his mind

-Like “In your face Solomon, MY HUMAN got to make 100 pacts before you had the chance. Haha what a loser.”

-I feel like the brothers sometimes wish to just abandon Mammon somehowere so they don’t have to deal with this

-Dude doesn’t care how many pacts you have or with who as long as you remember ‘he was your first man.’

-Of course you of all people would be able to attain such a significant achievement

-You were his human after all

-No matter what you do, he will be even more smitten with you than before

Levi:

-“That’s cool. Will you pass me my headphones.”

-“....”

-“Wait....you did whAT?”

-You’re telling him that he barely has the courage to step outside the House of Lamentation but you can go right ahead and start making pacts with demons like it’s nothing???

-Did he just get beaten at life by a normie?? His normie even??

-He’s really panicking because the shit you’d have to deal with when making that kind of bond with Lord Diavolo is apparently very terrifying and he’s scared something bad will happen

-Pacts also mean markings on your body, so his whole jealousy thing kinda sparks here

-Because ‘it’s not fair you have all these people’s pact marks on you while mine is barely visible!”

-Even though his is like, really obvious too???

-Other than that, he just feels like you’re gaining EXP and getting stronger, like a video game character which is cool

-I want him to show up whenever MC gets in a new pact and just shout ‘Level Up!’ at the top of his lungs lmao

-He doesn’t have that much of an opinion on Solomon, besides his cooking, but he’s impressed and a bit scared that you can outdo a human like him in something as dangerous as this

-Lololololo, Solomon got wrecked by a human normie what a noob XD XD #badassnormie #solomoncanteven #gameoversorcerer

-The brothers seem pretty adamant at rubbing the salt into Solomon’s wounds, can we get an f in the chat for our white haired wizard boi

Satan:

-He knew that humans were capable of a lot of things but what the fuck?

-How is that even possible???? What is the likelyhood of a random human managing to make 100 pacts???

-He is probably the most unsettled because he relies on probability and logic to get him through his day to day life

-And that shit don’t make no fucking sense

-He’s not agitated, just very shocked

-And then he realises the potential threats you’ve been exposed to considering all the demons you’ve had a chat with

-So now he’s just thanking Lord Diavolo that you weren’t eaten alive by some lower level demon scum

-Don’t be surprised if he asks you how you went about when you started making pacts with demons

-You were always a bit of a special case and you certainly stood out from the very beginning but this was something completely different

-For a human like you, that is a very respected achievement you’ve unlocked

-Satan figures that since you made pacts with him and his brothers, you would try to do so with Lord Diavolo too

-But he actually accepted?? You just kinda gave up part of your soul to the demon prince and now you have full control over him???

-It’s amazing how easily you could make demons of all things to trust you

-He respects that and also appreciates your tactical approach to this as well

-It’d be pretty easy to summon a demon to get your ass out of danger if the need arises

-He has no idea what you do to him but it’s strange he would rather let you ramble on about the backstory of every pact you made in the past year than read his collection of books

-Wrath certainly isn’t the only thing in his heart right now

Asmo:

-#conflicted

-His partner beat his ex fuck-buddy at making a pact with Lord Diavolo

-Asmo knew you were special ever since that retreat at Lord Diavolo’s palace when you managed to summon him with such power

-But he definitely wouldn’t have guessed you would be capable of something like this

-Your bravery when it comes to this sort of thing endears him a lot

-He will probably want to see all of your pact marks now (haha you’re in danger)

-Unlike his brothers, he knew damn well why you had managed to make around 100 pacts in just one year

-Demons aren’t used to anything genuine or with good intent

-So, it makes sense they would be attracted like magnets to you and your approachable, kind nature

-After all, demons can’t deal with temptation very well

-Solomon is cunning and ominous, not that different from anyone else down there and it’s a fact the brothers don’t even trust him that much

-But Lord Diavolo?

-“MC honey you hit the jackpot! Tell me every little detail!! What happened? How did the topic of a pact come up?”

-He’s not worried about you overall

-Not because he doesn’t care but he believes that if you can survive for a year with the seven avatars of sin and also convince 93 other demons to make a pact with you, then you can handle whatever Lord Diavolo throws at you

-He probably buys a bunch of revealing clothing you can show off all of your marks because they look ‘fabulous’

-It’s the only think he’s gonna talk about for a while because how many other humans can say they have control of the prince of Hell???

-Asmo also acknowledges that Diavolo must have trusted you a lot for him to agree to this which he thinks is incredible

-He will definitely listen if you have any stories on the pacts you made because he finds them very thrilling and he loves the sound of your voice!!

-Again, he doesn’t need human souls, just a mirror, some skin products and drama to survive

-And you, if I had to guess

Beel:

-The calmest our of the seven about it

-You made a bunch of pacts? Cool, it just shows how strong and independent you are

-Which made him respect you even more to be honest

-He flinches a bit when you tell him about Lord Diavolo because he knows that the prince isn’t the type to agree to anything without being given something in return

-Even if he knows you can handle yourself, he will be right there beside you to help you out

-Also, uh, don’t tell Belphie about the pact thing Diavolo. He might blow a fuse

-You guys work out together sometimes and he is usually utterly mesmerised by all the pact marks you have on your body

-He kinda wishes you would have asked him or one of his brothers to come along with you when you made your pacts

-Just in case things went wrong

-He regrets a lot of things that had happened until now, but one thing he absolutely cherishes is the pact you made with him

-Beel is aware that his brothers think the same and if you think you can deal with the pressure of having some many demons under control, then he won’t nag you too much about being careful

-As for the Solomon thing, he doesn’t have much to say

-I mean, yeah, he is a sorcerer and you’re just a human but if you could make a pact with Lord Diavolo in such a small time frame before he even had the chance to?

-It means you’re just as special as he is

-And definitely a better cook

Belphie:

-ok maybe humans aren’t as stupid as he originally thought them to be

-Making pacts with so many demons is something that takes strength and intelligence, so props to you

-He would never admit it, but you being able to do all this shit without batting an eyelid is seriously restoring his love for humans and their culture

-might take a while tho

-He also wonders when you had the time to make so many bonds, considering he spends most of the day with you at RAD and at home

-Eh, he was probably asleep

-His view of you before the incident did a full 180 degrees

-This sort of thing in DevilDom is something worth praising, especially for an average human like you

-And ‘I guess you don’t look all that bad with so many pact marks on your body *angy boi blush* but I still like mine best!’

-It might be best not to mention the Lord Diavolo thing, otherwise his brain might snap in two

-But turns out, he seems pretty relaxed about it

-Too relaxed, I would say

-“Hey do you think you could use your pact with Lord Diavolo to do something that would tarnish his reputation and maybe embarrass Lucifer while you’re at it, idk.”

-Ah, so that’s what it was

-He’s such a mischievous, spoiled brat

-“No Belphie shush.”

-“I’m just saying-“

-Despite him hating humans way less nowadays, he still holds somewhat of a grudge against them

-Old habits die hard I suppose

-Especially for Solomon whom he never liked in the first place

-He finds it very amusing when he figures out you just beat Solomon at his life’s work in under a year

-He has a good chuckle about it but never actually brings it up in front of him

-Because he knows you’re gonna flick him over the ear for it

-Belphie is the youngest sibling and therefore the spoiled child, can’t change my mind

(Ok so poor Solomon, I kinda want to give him a hug now lol. Hope I didn’t make these too repetitive or short. Thank you for reading!)

Al~

#obey me #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me imagines #obey me leviathan #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me satan #⭐️ requests #🕯 general #☂️ demon brothers

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bthump · 3 years

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I know this is very nitpicky, but what do you think is the level of awareness Griffith has during the stairwell scene? For a very calculated and rational guy like him, it's hard to imagine that he hasn't even tried to decipher where these strong reckless reactions come from. I mean... even king of denial Guts has reflected a bit on it. Enough to ask Griffith about it. I know yoy mentioned in a recent answer to an ask, that you don't headcanon Griffith as pining, so would you say that you (cont)

Would you say that you imagine that he compartimentalizes his thougts and represses to the point that he doesn't aknowledge at least to a certain extent, that his feeling for Guts are more passionate, than what he feels for other comerades. The fact that he fully realises the depth of those feelings once Guts leaves is clear. But Idk the stairwell scene makes me think that he is at least aware, that he has a bit of a crush, but choses to not give it much importance. Curious about your thoughts

hmmm. okay first off I just want to say that I can see multiple possibilities, from full on repression and denial, to recognizing his attraction but not acting on it, to knowing he cares for Guts and wants him as a True Friend(TM) but often downplaying that because he believes Guts sees him mainly as a superior officer. But yeah I do prefer the denial and compartmentalization explanation and I want to go into why, because I think it’s fun to talk about lol.

So the big reason I read Griffith as refusing to acknowledge his feelings to himself is because that’s how he deals with all his other inconvenient feelings, like his guilt and fear and the fact that he cares about the Hawks. Like eg when he tells Gennon that he doesn’t feel a single emotion about him whatsoever, or when he tells Casca that he doesn’t feel guilty over the deaths of the Hawks, I don’t think he’s just lying to them, I think he’s convincing himself too, to the point where he really believes it.

It’s sort of hard to explain how I see this working in Griffith’s head bc it feels v intuitive to me but I know that’s not the case for everyone. So yk it’s not that I think he like, eg makes himself forget that he nearly had a breakdown in a river, but I think he doesn’t ask himself why he nearly had a breakdown beyond maybe a shallow ‘sex with gennon was unpleasant and made me uncomfortable for a couple hours but i’m completely fine now’ and doesn’t think about it afterwards if he can help it.

And when he tells Charlotte he doesn’t have any friends and tells Guts he belongs to him during the second duel, I think he’s telling himself lies/rationalizations he genuinely believes there too. In fact, I think his denial of his own feelings is straight up meant to be his tragic flaw, which is why he’s only able to finally acknowledge them in the torture chamber, after it’s caused his downfall.

In the torture chamber we see him remember the face-off with Zodd and acknowledge that it was an irrational thing to do and wonder why Guts is so important to him, and I think part of the reason the monologue works so well is because it’s the first time we see that kind of self-reflection sans lofty rationalization from him, because before he ended up trapped in his own brain for a year with nothing to distract himself in between bouts of torture he didn’t really ask himself these kinds of questions. If he had, things probably would’ve gone better for everyone.

And like, I don’t think this makes Griffith less intelligent, or negates his rationality in other areas of life. I don’t see a contradiction in someone being able to analyze a battlefield or read other people well but avoiding genuine soul searching whenever possible and lying to himself a lot. I think it’s actually pretty realistic - I don’t think very many people fully understand themselves or their feelings, even really self-reflective people, and it’s very easy to rationalize away inconvenient cognitive dissonance. and I include myself in that lol.

Griffith’s life is kind of a contradiction that would really fuck him up to untangle (he sends people to their deaths to achieve a dream for the sake of assuaging his guilt for sending people to their deaths to achieve a dream), so he doesn’t try to untangle it, he avoids the question and hides behind a philosophical ideal. And his feelings for Guts add to that cognitive dissonance because if he values Guts over the dream, that kind of proves his entire defensive life philosophy is bullshit and his whole life plan is built on a precarious house of cards, so it makes sense to me that he’d avoid examining those feelings closely too.

And you can look at Guts too, who does navelgaze a lot and tries to analyze his own feelings and motivations - when he’s faced with a contradiction (I want to become independent of Griffith and do my own thing solely to gain Griffith’s approval) he actually notices it and briefly questions himself... and then he still puts it out of his mind and continues pursuing his contradictory goal anyway, and manages to stay in denial for 3 days even after learning that Griffith ended up in a torture chamber because he left.

Along those same lines, Guts eg realizes that he kills things because it makes him feel better but he doesn’t make the connection between his irrational urge to fight powerful enemies and his childhood trauma the way the readers can, the King didn’t acknowledge his incesty feelings til Griffith shoved them in his face, Count Slug kept denying having human feelings til Puck went on a tirade against him and he couldn’t sacrifice his daughter, Casca lies to herself about her feelings for Griffith for a long time before finally acknowledging she’s in love and then doubles down on her Griffith feelings when her newer feelings for Guts threaten them until she has a breakdown and admits some things to herself (I mean I find that last one disappointing lol, but it’s also a really straightforward example of someone living in denial of romantic feelings and therefore a good comparison point to show that Miura does this on purpose), etc. So I think this interpretation of Griffith is also consistent with how Miura just like, tends to write people.

Like imo Griffith has moments where he comes close to self awareness and could’ve started potentially reflecting on his feelings and coming to better, more accurate conclusions, and those moments definitely include the Zodd conversation (as well as the river scene with Casca, and “do you think I’m cruel?”) but none of those scenes lead to useful self-reflection because they all go wrong. Casca tries but fails to reassure him bc she’s out of her depth, Guts reminds him of his dream, the King interrupts their conversation and Charlotte reorients Griffith towards his goal so he can move on from that moment of irrationality and refrain from thinking about it further for a while. Even after the duel Griffith tries to avoid self-reflection by fucking Charlotte imo (”take all the sad and frightening things and cast them into the fire” ie hey girl wanna repress some shit w/ me?), and imo his previous ability to do that makes it all the more impactful when it doesn’t work this time and he breaks down.

BUT YEAH all that said I don’t think this is the only reasonable reading of Griffith’s awareness of his feelings lol, it’s just the one I like best and consider the most satisfying and interesting and fun to think about. And honestly that’s partly because I love dramatic irony and have a real thing for characters who lie to themselves, so I’m biased in favour of it too. Nothing about Griffith being good at denial contradicts the idea that he could still be aware of an attraction to Guts (in that case he’d probably just write it off as irrelevant and deny the associated internalized-homophobia-related self-loathing lol until it all pours out while he’s projecting at the King), and he could eg be aware that he irrationally cares about Guts above and beyond anyone else and just doesn’t even try to reconcile that with his dream, ie compartmentalization in another way.

But I think the idea that he only fully admits it to himself in the torture chamber is just very narratively satisfying.

#Anonymous #ask #griffguts #ty for the question and giving me an opportunity to go on about this #a #b #character: griffith #theme: coping mechanisms #theme: repression #ship: griffguts #headcanons #character thoughts #arc: ga

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cellard0ors · 3 years

Text

Ficlet: Beneath The Blue

Mermay isn't over and people enjoyed Part 1, so here's some more...

Rhett has a bit of a gambling problem.

No, that's not quite right. More like a gaming problem. He likes games. He likes the rush of winning and it's not so much about money as the thrill of nailing a dart on a bullseye or getting a hole in one or - well - being right.

He really loves that one. Trivia, guessing games, riddles - lucking out on the right answer or just knowing it, always makes him feel fantastic. He's had marginal luck in his life. With basketball, with singing, and now - with his new current career - fishing, but games?

Rhett's always mastered those, rarely ever a loser. But the thing is, to do those things, he tends to have to use cash as an entry to play, thus - a sort-of-not-really gambling problem.

And winning in those kind of situations is also a problem, because, after some time - it tends to attract...attention. And usually the bad kind. Recently it was very much the bad kind, because he was at The 101, engaging in his normal play only to be snatched up by some very rough looking characters.

Ones who took him into a backroom and decided to skip right over the 'broken knuckles' threat and jump right into the 'you're going to go sleep with the fishes' threat.

To be fair, they probably went quickly into the decision once he started fighting back. Rhett's not much of a brawler, but he's a big guy and that in and of itself can create...issues. Especially if his temper is up.

Long story short - Rhett's bit of a gambling problem led him to being clonked over the head (more than once, matter of fact) and taken out to sea. His last real memory before hitting the water was that he'd been amazed at the boulder they'd found to attach him to - where had they gotten such a huge rock from? A landfill?

Not that it mattered - rock, rope, and Rhett all went overboard and into the deep. Rhett tried not to hold his breath, to struggle enough just to get loose, but, in the end - he'd been lost.

Except he hadn't been.

He'd awoken to find the setting sun bathing him in golden light and, above him, an angel. Because only an angel could have such eyes. Eyes as blue and deep and mysterious as the sea he was supposed to have died in.

His throat ached from damn near drowning but he'd still managed to ask the angel for his name. And he'd gotten it.

Link.

But then the angel had turned, vanished, and Rhett had seen that - while he was right about his mythical savior - he was not at all right about what kind.

Because Link had a tail.

A fish tail.

One as sparkling blue and captivating as his eyes and he'd disappeared into the surf so fast, Rhett began to question his sanity.

Had he imagined it all? The entire experience had been traumatic as heck - maybe it was just a coping mechanism for his mind? But then, far out, he'd seen a head appear above the waters.

Seen it and a shy wave and he'd waved back, because what else could he do? He wasn't dead and he wasn't crazy. He'd been saved. Saved...by a mermaid (merman?) named Link.

Which leads to now and his camping out full time on this small rocky stretch of lonely beach. Rhett made sure to check in with the local marina, see if it was okay for him to dock his tiny fishing boat, The Bluegrass, nearby. And 'nearby' was about a mile or so away, because this bit of land is pretty unoccupied and small.

...the perfect place for a merman (mermaid?) to drop off someone they saved. And, hopefully, return to? Rhett's not sure - honestly, this whole thing might be a fool's errand, but either way - he has a tent pitched and is waiting.

Waiting to see if Link returns.

Night after night seems like a failure. Still, Rhett doesn't mind. He can be patient. His last haul (fish-wise, not gambling-wise) earned him a considerable amount, so there's no harm in waiting.

Still, as he sits here now, the sky a lovely lilac as the sun dips low beneath the horizon, he can't help but feel like time's running out. Honestly, what did he expect? For Link to return and want to...what? Be best friends?

The person...creature...per-creature? Did what he could and Rhett should just be grateful and move on. But there was something about him...and those eyes...and that voice...

Rhett cracks open another can of soda, takes a deep sip when he hears it. The water's waves have become almost a white noise at this point, so consistent, but this...this is different. Just a little splish. Or splash. Or whatever.

And it's close. He puts the can down and quickly surges to his feet, looking out intently over the water and then he sees it. Just the top of someone's head. His head. Dark wet hair and blue eyes behind...are those glasses? And Rhett can't see his nose or anything else, but he can see enough to cry out, "Hey!"

The head rears back, sinks some, and Rhett feels a surge of panic, not wanting to lose this opportunity, "No! Wait, wait! Link! I-!"

The head stops, goes still. Rhett continues on, desperate for this to continue, "Please...don't go."

He doesn't.

Bolstered, Rhett continues, hoping he's heard, understood, "I...I just-? You saved me."

Link simply blinks.

"Thank you."

There's a bobbing in the water around him and Rhett's pretty sure Link nodded. Rhett edges just that little bit closer, "I...I'd hoped you'd come back. Not only so I could thank you, but so...um...maybe-? Maybe we could-? Could talk-?"

Link sinks a little more again, but Rhett can still see his eyes and, as long as he can see those, he feels okay, "I mean...you-you came back. Right? So-so maybe you'd-? You'd like to talk too?"

Link's head disappears.

Rhett feels his heart break. But then he notices that the water is moving. There's a rippling, the kind he sees when fish swim close to the surface. As if to punctuate that thought, the broad tip of a blue tail rises up and out, pushing against the waves.

He's swimming closer!

Rhett resists the urge to hoot in delight, to pumping his arms in victory, as Link pushes forward and, on the next movement of water, he surges upwards - his whole head visible now.

Link's entire face is nice.

A strong jaw, a good nose, a very fine mouth and yeaaaah, Rhett doesn't want Link to swim off, so he's going to do his very best not to focus on that mouth too much as he says, "I'm-I'm Rhett."

Link licks his lips, dips his head shyly, "I'm Link."

"Y-Yeah, you-you said..."

They both just sort of eyeball one another, both clearly unsure of what to make of the other. Of how to proceed. Eventually Rhett does, "So, ah, you're-? You're a mermaid?"

Link's eyebrows rise.

"Merman?"

"Just Mer," Link clarifies, "Our kind doesn't really attach those bits on the end there."

"Really?"

Link nods, "Humans came up with that one."

"Oh? We-we did?"

Another nod, "Back when we first used to come across one another."

"...take it that doesn't really happen now?"

"Not really. No."

Another awkward silence falls. Rhett scratches at one cheek, struggling for something else to say when Link blurts, "You're hairy."

Rhett lowers his hand and - much to his own surprise - he bursts out laughing. Link colors some and he gives a bashful smile and okay, Rhett said he wasn't going to pay too much attention to that mouth, but it's hard when it's so danged cute, "Yeah, yeah I am, brother."

"Bro-ther?" Link repeats and it's clearly a word he's unfamiliar with. Rhett beams, "'Brother'. We use it for family members. Y'know, the boys born from the same Momma and such. Can be a term of endearment too."

"Oh..." Link seems pleased with this and Rhett grins, "You got one?"

Link's eyebrows knit together and Rhett explains, "A brother? Or-or some other family or-?"

"I was spawned from another Mer. She came to shore to give birth to me."

Rhett's eyes grow wide, "You-? You were born on land?"

Link nods, "Most of us are. Mers walk between both worlds more often than not."

Rhett lets that one wash over him even as Link comes closer. Rhett can see his tail better now. It's amazing. Glossy and sparkling blue, the scales tightly knit. Rhett's first reaction is wanting to touch it but he quickly shutters that idea - recognizing it as beyond rude. They've just started talking to one another, for goodness sake!

Still, seeing it rest against the wet sand of the shoreline is tempting and seeing it move, more so. It slides and slithers, but in such an enticing way. Rhett moves a little closer, foam teasing at his toes as Link looks up (and up) at him, "Hard to talk at this level..."

Rhett realizes he probably looks like a giant at Link's angle, the Mer practically lying at his feet, so he lowers himself down until his butt hits the sand, crossing his legs at the ankles, "Better?"

Link nods and Rhett does a bit of a wiggle backward to avoid getting his khaki cargo shorts wet. There's an amused smirk around Link that says he recognizes that action. But of course he does - Mers, apparently, can traverse between land and sea.

So, Link is probably aware of how clothing works. Has he ever worn clothing? Come to the shore? Rhett wants to ask so many questions, but isn't sure what's appropriate and what isn't, but Link beats him to the questioning, "Are you a fisherman?"

Rhett lets out a strained 'Ah-?' as he immediately realizes that the true answer will no doubt insult his new acquaintance, but, again, Link beats him to the punch, "You've got the attire for it. Flannel shirt, baseball cap..."

Rhett frowns, "You think fisherman have a particular attire?"

"To my recollection..." The remark makes Rhett chuckle again, unable to help himself, "'Recollection' - you sound so danged southern. Just like me. I was born and raised in North Carolina."

Link beams, "That's where I was spawned! My sire came from the same location. Not all Mers are from the sea. Some reside in lakes, rivers - any water deep enough to conceal us, but a lot of us return to the ocean, considering its the biggest body of water."

Rhett lets that sink in even as Link again asks, "So, you are a fisherman, right?"

"Um-?"

"It's okay if you are," Link assures him, folding his arms and resting his chin there, "It's not really a proud profession amongst my kind, but it's understandable."

Rhett's lips twitch from side to side, "So I'm not, like, catching up your friends or something?"

Link snorts, "What - you think we talk to them?"

"Heck, man - I don't know how it works," Rhett lets out a peal of nervous giggles, getting the idea that Link is teasing him. Link returns the laugh and Rhett relaxes as a realization settles in.

Whether or not Rhett wants to admit it, he did want Link to return. He wanted him to return and be his friend and it appears that that is indeed what is happening.

It's happening and Rhett couldn't be any happier.

#rhink #mermay #mermaid!au #my writing #randl

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13eyond13 · 3 years

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Do you really think Takada could have gone against Light's wishes or used him in return in a way that made sense with the way she was written morally, politically and personality-wise? How do you imagine that could have gone? What could she have wanted to do, achieve, or how could she have gone against his wishes? And do you think it would have been more morally related, like Mikami killing people that didn't fit Kira's criteria, or more at a personal level? Both?

I would also like to know if you think Light liked Takada to some extent or even harboured some feelings for her, despite his ultimate coldness, and if you think their relationship gets a different treatment in the manga and the anime.

Hello again! Thanks for both of your asks. I am only publishing this one with the questions, but I liked and agreed with all the insights you included about Kiyomi, Misa, and Light in the previous ask too. And I'm very impressed that you re-read the entire manga in such a short period of time! Please be warned that I'm too tired and lazy at the moment to reread anything myself lol, so I am basing this off super distant memories of last reading and watching the successor arc approximately 3 years ago now...

(under a cut bc it's a bit long)

Do you really think Takada could have gone against Light's wishes in some way? Or used him in return in a way that made sense with the way she was written morally, politically, and personality-wise? How do you imagine that could have gone? Would it be more morally-related, or on a personal level, or both?

I think yes, it could've been possible for Ohba to write Kiyomi that way instead while still keeping her in-character. But he normally isn't too concerned with emotionally developing most of the characters apart from Light. And any drastic changes in behaviour like this for Kiyomi in the second half would probably be more effective if Ohba had been consciously setting her character up from the very start to return again later on, or to play a role in the narrative of that sort. And apparently this was not the case. Ohba said in the behind the scenes book that he never originally planned for Kiyomi to return at a later date when he first introduced her; I think she was initially just meant to be one of the many expendable female classmates whom Light was camouflaging his social life with while being tailed at school. Indeed, barely anything of significance happens in Kiyomi's introductory scenes to even really warrant introducing her character by name. So when she was brought back as Kira's spokesperson later on I don't think it was because Ohba had some strong desire to further develop her emotionally. Maybe he was mostly just wanting to flesh out Kira's posse and the overall worldbuilding a bit more. This is typical of the series in general though, as most of the characters stay pretty static in their stances and their motives and emotional journeys apart from Light.

I don't have a ton of energy to come up with a lot of specific scenarios for Kiyomi to do something differently right now, and to be honest it's kind of even slipping my mind how the whole thing even was working between Light and Kiyomi plot-wise in canon as it was. Like I'm totally forgetting now what kind of faking they had to do initially with each other and the task force listening in on their meetings and Light secretly being Kira and such, lol.

But anyway, here are some things that maybe could have been done differently with her character:

SHE DIDNT ACTUALLY LIKE HIM BACK THEN -It could've been revealed that Kiyomi hadn't actually had sincere feelings for Light when they were dating back in the day at all, and that Light's vanity about his usual popularity with girls somewhat blinded him to this fact. I think this would be just as realistic as Kiyomi secretly holding a flame for him all these years and then agreeing to be his mistress, for sure. And it would make sense to me that she is equally as opportunistic and shallow and image-conscious as he is when it comes to who she dates, both in the past and in the present. Especially because apparently she was the one who made the first move and asked him out. Even if this didn't affect the plot all that much, I still think it would be funny and a bit of a refreshing break from everyone always drooling all over Light

SHE DID LIKE HIM BACK THEN, BUT SHE DOESN'T LIKE HIM NOW -She could have maybe genuinely liked Light when they briefly dated at school, but him being kind of a dick to her back then means that she no longer feels anything for him when he looks her up again. She could still act like she is interested in rekindling their romance, but really only be doing it for utilitarian and selfish motives of her own. Maybe career-building motives or ideological ones or personal ones, or a mix of them all, who knows. But she would be secretly playing him the entire time he's playing her; inwardly looking down on him for his vanity and his arrogant assumptions all the while he is secretly looking down on her for apparently being so gullible. It could possibly be pretty funny to watch

SHE LIKES HIM AGAIN, BUT THEN SHE CHANGES HER MIND - She could still be genuinely into it him when they reunite, but then experience something traumatic or shocking like the kidnapping a bit earlier in the plot that she survives and that radically changes her views. It could make her completely lose her faith in her Kira ideals, or her attraction to Light, or both. Or maybe just something like the grim reality of Light asking her to personally murder people with the notebook could cause her to rethink things that she previously stood for, because it all becomes a lot more scary and gruesome and real. She definitely had a horrified reaction when faced with the task of committing any murders herself, but she still went along with it anyway. That easily could have been a personal crisis that set her off down an entirely different path

I would also like to know, considering Takada's relationship and parallelism with Light, and how Light seems to treat her marginally better than he treats Misa while with her, if you think Light liked her a bit or harboured some kind of feelings for her, despite ultimate coldness, and if you think their relationship gets a different treatment in the manga and the anime.

I think Light treated Kiyomi with a bit more attention than Misa mostly because she is higher maintenance in the respect she requires from a romantic partner in order to feel trusting of them and devoted to them. But he still mostly looked down on her inwardly, and seemed to barely even pay enough attention to her to develop any feelings for her otherwise. All of Light's thoughts about Kiyomi are dismissive and mocking and unkind, no matter what kind of flattering and admiring things he's saying to her to win her trust. I don't think he particularly hated her or anything like that; but he clearly didn't ever respect her or find her very interesting, either. I think this is because he could successfully fool her with his manipulation, and because all he ever really cared about whenever he was interacting with her was using her to achieve his own goals.

Their relationship was depicted pretty similarly between the manga and the anime, I think? But it's been so long now since I've read or watched it that I can't really confidently say what the major differences between the anime and the manga for this relationship are now, sorry. I haven't been keeping fresh on canon these days, because I'm spending all my time this year trying to read and watch new things instead

#kiyomi #light yagami #misa amane #kiyomixlight #ask #anon #p #i hope this is coherent hahaha i am half asleep #also maybe a little stoned #meta

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majesticbrownjawn · 4 years

Text

Delicate Part Three

Part One

Part Two

They rode quietly back to their side of town, Violet in a contemplative state of awe the whole way.

How'd he know her name? Maybe it was a freaky, weird coincidence.

She was completely taken by E. How'd he will her to give herself to him so quickly? She hadn't done anything like since her 20's. Her entire being wanted to stay there in Oakland, which let her brain know she had to do the opposite.

She had to stay away from him.

"You have to stay away from him," Trina said as she was climbing out of Violet's car. It was like her best friend had heard her thoughts and repeated them to make sure your got the picture.

"What?"

"He's no good, Vi," she asserted.

"How would you know? You just met him yourself." Violet's tone was defensive and she didn't know why, but Trina was absolutely right.

"I-I just know his type...AND know he had you with your drawers hanging around your ankles when I found you," she answered with an air of satisfaction in her voice. "God knows how many other women he's had like looking that."

Violet's eyes bulged in horror. She was always the more level-headed of the two. Sensible and practical were her middle names. Her role in their relationship was the responsible one. Violet relished in being the wise friend who always seemed to have it together and just a few hours with E was already tarnishing her image.

"Did you see him though?" Violet was trying her best to appeal to Trina's weakness for attractive men. She couldn't pick a guy with character to save her life, but they were almost always fine, and Violet was an eyewitness to Trina's inventory of E when she introduced them at the party.

Trina huffed and folded her arms at Violet disapprovingly.

"Fine. I already decided I would stay away from him. That's why I ran out of there so fast."

****

Violet loved food.

It was no wonder, though. She didn't just magically wake up one day in her pillowy-soft body.

But she turned that love for food into a craft, and studied culinary arts in Paris. Chef V's years of experience working under the best chefs in Europe made her a shoe-in for one of the few Michelin-starred restaurants in the States. She was the only Black woman executive chef of a restaurant of this caliber, which was both an honor and a shame to her. She wanted nothing more than to help other Black women in the her industry come up, but found the balance of trying to stay on top of her game and making time to give back a challenge. Doing anything other than working was a challenge for her. Maybe that was why she was so easily swayed by someone like E.

Her thoughts briefly went back to that day, now two months in the past—and she shuttered a bit at the thought of him. She would have been lying if she said she was glad he never contacted her. But she knew not hearing from him was for the best.

The sound of clanking fine china and sizzling kobe beef buzzed around her as she stood in the center of an upscale kitchen barking out orders like Gordon Ramsey. This kind of power gave her a high that was as exhilarating as it was exhausting. Everyone looked to her for direction and approval, a position she was quite familiar with.

Her younger siblings looked to her for guidance after her parents' death as a teenager and from then on, people kind of just sensed the leader in her. She was forced into being this person at a young age—maybe too young – but eventually embraced it. The consequence was that she came off as a snobby, slightly controlling bitch who thought she was smarter than everyone else.

Almost everyone.

Violet ran a tight ship and mistakes were not tolerated, so when her sous chef Suzie ran into the kitchen with beet-red cheeks and a half-eaten plate, she was curious as to what the flustered woman would say.

"There's a man out there," Suzie whispered.

"Speak up, Suzie. I can barely hear you."

"He said his steak is undercooked."

A collective silence fell over the kitchen as everyone stopped to see what Chef V would do next. She jerked her head back and studied the steak on the returned plate.

It was cooked to perfection.

She smacked her teeth before heading to the kitchen doors to peer out of its circular windows. She scanned the restaurant briefly, trying to pick up on who she thought the picky customer might be. She usually had an eye for patrons who liked to complain in hopes of a free meal, but she couldn't quite figure it out tonight.

"Who sent it back?"

"Him...over there at table 46."

Table 46 was the best table in the house. You could see the entire city skyline from its positioning and it was purposefully tucked away for the sake of privacy. Violet had served numerous celebrities and wealthy diners at table 46. She didn't think to look over there initially. When she did, the silhouette of strong, broad shoulders caught her eye. She pushed the doors open with frustration, ready to take on this tasteless customer, but as she marched forward, more of the man's physique came into focus. And the man's physique was familiar.

His hair—locs – specifically, was finally what caused her to stop dead in her tracks. Suzie, following a bit too closely, crashed into Violet, sending the returned plate cascading to the floor. The commotion caused half the restaurant to look in their direction and had Violet not been so caught up in the man, she would have been embarrassed.

But she was caught up.

Violet audibly gasped when he turned to face her. But it wasn't him. It wasn't E. As she dismissed herself back to the kitchen, she felt a bit of sadness that the picky customer wasn't the man who so easily made her feel open enough to do things she'd never done, but always dreamed of doing—especially as it pertained to sex. Unfortunately, there was a side of her that she'd never explored. She'd never found the right person she felt safe enough to do those things with, so she fantasized about them instead. That is, until she met him.

"Just cook him another one," she flatly told Suzie, completely defeated. Her sous chef quickly got to work on a replacement steak, while Violet slipped away to her small office in the rear of the kitchen.

"You would work at a bougie ass place like this, wouldn’t you?”

His voice caused an immediate reaction from her body, though she refused to let him know it. Part of her was angry, seeing him after all this time, smiling smugly at her in her office. She stared at him sternly before speaking.

"How'd you get back here?"

"You thought that nigga was me, didn't you?"

"Ye—you didn't answer my question."

"You didn't answer mine, babygirl." Her stomach fluttered at that name. Then she thought about him figuring out her real name.

"How'd you know my name?"

"Lucky guess," he smirked. "Your name is really Violet?" He said sarcastically.

She huffed and pointed to the embroidered script of her name and title on her chef coat.

"Lucky guess, my ass. How'd you get back here, E?"

He took a seat in front of her, as confident and fine as ever. The fitted turtleneck he wore had her feeling vulnerable. A bearded gentleman in a turtleneck was something she could hardly ever resist. So this man, though far from what she considered a gentleman, would certainly be a challenge to overcome. She'd already succumb to his charm once and she couldn't blame that time on piece of clothing.

She remained standing in between his obnoxiously widespread legs. He leaned back into the cushiony chair, totally relaxed.

And in control.

"One of my girls—" he cleared his throat unnecessarily. "I know one of the hostesses."

"Why are you here? Did you know I worked here?"

"Why you asking all these questions? You not happy to see me?" He leaned forward and rested an elbow to his knee.

"I don't have time for this. You come up in here playing games on the busiest night of the week. You can see yourself out, E."

She quickly side-stepped his legs on a mission to make it to the door, but he caught her hand just before she was out of reach.

"Where are you going, Violet." His question wasn't a question at all.

"What do you want from me?" She was sincere in her query. Why'd he show up here, two months later?

"I wanna fuck you, girl. Make them pretty ass eyes roll to the back of your head again."

Them eyes—her eyes, broke contact with his and drifted to his crotch. His dick print was visible on his inner thigh. She wanted to touch it so badly. She hadn't gotten the chance to the first time.

"You see it," he smirked.

It was hard to miss.

"Got me hard as fuck watching you do your thing, Chef V," he teased.

His hand led her back in front of him.

"Maybe I'll let you boss me around one day like you do these peons in yo kitchen."

She gulped loudly when he stood up, his physical presence looming over her making her feel small again, just how she liked.

E kissed her with enough power to topple her over, but the desk was there to catch her.

He didn't stop when her position suddenly lowered under him, he just readjusted and leaned down into her. She moaned shamefully when his tongue wiggled into her mouth and his hand groped her breast. The thick chambray material of her chef jacket was getting in the way of her feeling the full sensation of his hands and it frustrated her. The way his adept fingers teased her nipples the day they met was all she could think about when she moved his hand under her top.

"I guess you did miss me, Chef V."

"Shut up," she groaned. She didn't need him reminding her of the obvious. Reminding her what she was doing was uncharacteristic and stupid.

"I missed you."

Did he really just try that playa shit on her? I missed you? The sirens she heard when she met him at his house party had officially made their return.

"I said shut up."

"Aye," his voice was calm but his eyes were ablaze.

There was a passion in them that quickly reminded her of E choking her in his workroom. She was terrified at first, but when he realized it was her and his hands loosened around her neck, she realized she very much liked the way they felt. Warm and firm.

Invigorating.

"I said you could boss me around one day, not

TO-day."

His hands roughly gripped the back of her knees and pulled her closer. Their middles met and she couldn't help but grind up against his erection as he nibbled and sucked on her lips.

"You really just came here to fuck me, E?" She managed to get out.

"Yea."

Violet didn't expect such a direct answer. She kind of wished he'd lied to her. That he told her she was special and that he wanted to get to know her.

But who was she kidding?

She didn't really want to get to know him. He was dangerous and not the type of man she could settle down with. This was all they could ever have.

Good sex.

No—great, amazing, superb sex.

Top two, not two sex.

The best sex she'd ever had.

She prayed it wouldn't be the best she would ever have. But was fantastic sex worth the space he took up in her head the last few months?

E started kissing her again, successfully distracting her from overthinking. He'd started unbuttoning her jacket when a loud knock on the door startled her. She stared at him like she was looking for him to tell her what to do. He shrugged and kissed her again.

"They'll go away," he whispered.

Another knock.

"Hold on!" She yelled, trying her best to quickly button herself back up. E rolled his eyes as he watched her frantically try to gather herself.

"...Stay," he said, calmly unbuttoning each button right after she'd fasten them. He hoped a kiss to her temple would convince her to remain in his presence a while longer. She contemplated it until she saw the handle of her office door turning.

She yanked herself loose from his grasp and stormed out of her office. She didn't even look at the person who'd been knocking. All she saw was a blur of someone in black. Violet didn't even get mad that they'd opened her door without her permission. She was grateful in a way. Grateful for an escape. God knows how long and how loud they would have been in there hunching.

She took a moment to compose herself before returning to her duties. Violet was literally hot all over. She stealthily grabbed a cup of ice from a machine towards the back of the kitchen. There was a spot just past her office that was a hideaway for her when she didn't want to be found by the few people brave enough to knock on her door, which made her wonder who knocked on her door tonight. It wasn't someone from the kitchen. All of her staff wore white. The thoughts of what the mystery person had interrupted with E quickly flooded her thoughts.

The few top buttons of her jacket were still unfastened thanks to E. She slid a piece of ice up and down her neck and across the top of her chest. Her mind raced back to him. His hot hands grazing her flesh, inching closer to her breasts. Her mind was gone and her hands, with the ice in them, were making circles over her sensitive, hardened tips. She wanted to cum so badly. She focused on him. The way his turtleneck clung to his muscular arms, hinting at the wonder that was his scar-laden body. His scent was still on her from being so close moments ago.

Mahogany.

Coconut.

Cedar.

The way his tongue explored her mouth. The way he grabbed her like she belonged to him. The ice between her fingers soon melted and her digits quickly found their way into her panties, hungrily applying pressure to her clit. It didn't take much effort to make herself cum after being deprived of him for eight weeks. The thrill of seeing him was more than enough to excite her in ways she'd never felt before.

But why?

She chuckled to herself as she washed her hands before heading back to the main area of the kitchen. He had her acting totally different and part of her liked it.

The look of relief on her sous chef Suzie's face was comical as he drew close to her.

"Thank God you're back, Chef V."

"Everything okay?"

"Yea, I guess. You know I just get nervous without you here. I just don't want anything bad to happen when you leave me in charge."

Suzie was a young woman in her mid-twenties. Violet took her under her wing because she had great potential and because she was Black. Mentoring her was the least she could do to give back to the next generation, but sometimes Suzie was a worrywart and annoyed Violet to no end. She could already feel the high of her orgasm wearing off.

"Did you remake table 46's steak?"

"Yes. He loved it."

"Okay and did the kitchen catch on fire while I was gone?" She looked around in an extra manner for added effect.

Suzie shook her head no.

"See? Everything is fine. You need to relax."

Violet took her place back at the center of the kitchen, putting finishing touches on plates in the special way she's been gifted to, and even took moments to praise or constructively critique the work of her staff. She could see how pleased they were to have her working side-by-side with them and made a mental note to have more nights in the kitchen like tonight.

Minus the part with E.

And her private moment with the ice.

***

The restaurant was not only heralded for some of the best dishes in the world, but it was also home to one of the country's most expensive delicacies—a chocolate cake covered in gold leaves. It was rare someone ordered it, because despite the wealthy clientele they served, a $15,000 dessert wasn't something people ordered every day. When Suzie told Violet table 46 had ordered the expensive ass cake, she gave her an impressed look and headed for the refrigerated safe where they kept the golden flecks.

She made her way to the back of the kitchen, just past her office and private corner. As she strolled back by her office with the gold leaves in hand, she thought she heard something — a voice — on the other side of her office door. She brushed it off and kept walking, but then remembered she never saw him leave. But to be fair, she never saw his creepy ass enter the kitchen in the first place, so whatever she thought she heard had to be her mind playing with her.

Violet dropped the leaves off with her pastry chef and tried to busy herself with work that did nothing to keep her brain from thinking about who may or may not be still in her office. Finally frustrated enough with herself and him for making her crazy, she marched back to her office, her chest filled with air and ready to go off of need be.

She flung the door open but was quickly deflated by the sight in front of her. Her eyes immediately zeroed in on E standing in the corner of her office with a woman on her knees in front of him. His brows were knitted together tightly and the intense look of pleasure on his face made her pussy throb with want. E slowly brought his eyes to Violet standing at the door watching him getting his dick sucked. She knew that he knew she had been there a few moments before giving her his attention. It felt like he knew she'd arrive at the exact time she did. Just in time for his show.

Violet stood there frozen, mouth slightly agape in a mixture of shock, jealousy and desire.

The woman on her knees wore all black and was sporting hair extensions that trailed down her back. Violet concluded she was the woman who knocked on her office door earlier, likely the hostess E slipped up and called one of his "girls." Violet could see why she was. She could suck a mean dick. The woman's mouth slowly trailed up his shaft, saliva dripping down her chin. The chef looked in awe at his cock, seeing him fully hard from this vantage point had her wondering how she took him so easily. E's dick disappeared into the hostesses' throat and it was enough to make him groan.

"Yea. Just like that." He was staring at Violet when he said it, like she was the one on her knees in front of him. The hostesses moaned at his praise, but he wasn't talking to her.

Violet had quietly closed the door behind her and was palming her sensitive breasts. Her eyes closed as she listened to the sounds in the room.

His labored breathing.

The hostesses' lude slurping and gagging.

Her own barely audible mewls.

"Look at me."

Violet knew he was talking to her without opening her eyes. Somehow, the hostess was still unaware of a third party in the room with her and E, stealing his attention from the good work she was doing on his dick.

Violet's eyes remained closed.

"Open your eyes." His command was surprisingly sweet, but laced with urgency.

"Iljshfhro," the hostess garbled. Violet assumed the woman was trying to tell E was indeed looking at him, but the hot dick in her mouth was prohibiting her from being fully understood.

Violet's eyes opened involuntarily from quietly laughing at how ridiculous the woman on her knees sounded. E smirked at Violet, unable to control his smile as he looked at her amused expression.

"C'mere, baby."

The smile had widened across his face, making the caps on his bottom row gleam against the soft lighting in the office. Perhaps the warm smile he gave her was the trick to getting her close to him. He felt relieved when she took a step forward, he was growing impatient and was dangerously close to begging her to come to him. E's desire for her had ballooned over the course of eight weeks and was on the verge of exploding. After meeting and subsequently fucking her that day, his mind frequently revisited their dalliance, sometimes in the most inopportune moments, like when he was blowing the backs out of other women. The most recent time it happened, he went fully soft inside one of his favorites when he looked down and realized she wasn't Violet.

He thought not only of the way her ample backside bounced beautifully against his scarred flesh, but of her wit and bold personality. Then there was the way he naturally felt possessive of her. E's teeth gritted together when he thought of how his homeboy looked at her gripping onto his bannister as they had sex. He came to the conclusion that he had to have her again, despite the nagging voice in his head telling him otherwise. At the least, he hoped sexing her again would get her out of his system. But in the moments when he was honest with himself, he knew the opposite was a more likely outcome.The hostess' head shifted in the direction of the door, but E's voice stopped her before she saw Violet approaching them.

"Don't look at her," he told the woman. Her head snapped back to its original positioning. E said it like he wanted to protect Violet. Like he knew Violet wouldn't be ok with the thirsty hostess knowing she was just as parched and needy for him.

E looked back at V with more tender eyes than he'd just had with the other woman. Violet was unsure if she was okay with his tone with hostess, even if it was to her advantage. Nevertheless, she moved until she was standing in front of him, the hostess wedged between them on the floor and looking to E for permission to do anything.Violet was captivated once again by his masculine beauty. And she didn't know it, but he was just as taken by her. He licked his lips as he stared at her plump ones, longing to tug and taste them again. He broke eye contact with her to look down at the pitiful soul under him. Waiting for direction on what she should do next.

"Get back to sucking my dick. Now," he commanded.

He shoved the woman's head into his groin and she happily continued gagging on him. Violet stepped even closer to him. Close enough that her stance called for her to straddle each of her feet just outside the hostesses' legs. Ever the obedient sub, the woman never looked behind her to see the woman hovering over her. She only did want he wanted, and E wanted her servicing his dick at the moment.

E reached out to grab the back of Violet's neck and kissed her feverishly. Her hands instantly found a place on his pebbled chest. The sensation of his scars against her palms sent tingles throughout her body and she fleetingly wondered again just what they meant and how he got them. She watched as he painfully pulled himself away from her and took a long look at his dick making its way in and out of the hostesses' mouth. He watched it like he didn't recognize it as an extension of himself.

"You see how fat my shit is for you?"

Violet didn't answer. She only continued staring with her lip wedged between her teeth at the scene she'd now become a part of. Her eyes struggled to keep focus on just his dick, though. E was too entrancing just to focus on one thing, even if that thing was his long, thick and currently, sinfully shiny dick.

Violet watched the way his fingers massaged the hostess' scalp while she swallowed him, making his biceps flex in a way that made Violet want to snatch the other woman off of him and take her place on her knees—mouth open and tongue out.

"You wanna suck it, don't you?"

"Yes," Violet squeaked before she realized what she was doing. E really had her caught up. She covered her mouth in shame.

He shook his head at her, laughing at her slip up. "Not yet, babygirl. Sit your cute ass over there."

Violet quickly plopped down in an upholstered chair a few feet behind her.

"Pull them titties out for me. I want to see you play with them while I cum for you."

V felt an uncontrollable shiver come over her that literally rattled every muscle in her body. It felt eerily similar to the feeling she got right before she orgasmed. She unbuttoned her chef coat and just barely touched herself. The light passes over her nipples were sending her in a way that felt as intense as squeezing them normally would. The sight before him was too much for him to hold on to any longer. E's mouth curled into the shape of an 'O' before his eyes briefly fluttered shut.

"I'm bout to cuuum...Gotdamn, shit baby."

His eyes opened to look at Violet and he pulled himself out of the hostess' mouth, preferring to use his hand to finish himself off. He tugged at his dick while looking at her gently rolling her fingertips across her engorged nipples. The waitress knew him well enough to calculate the exact moment he would cum. She stuck her tongue out in excitement and anticipation of his seed, admittedly in love with the feeling of his hot cum plastered across her face and tits. It was always her reward for being a good girl for him.

But she wouldn't enjoy one of her favorite parts of sex with him today. Instead of painting her with his orgasm, E shot his cum over her shoulder and in the direction of the woman sitting in the chair behind her. It shot out of him like nothing Violet had ever seen, so much so that some of it landed on the hem of her top. She stared down at the creamy substance and licked her lips, tempted to taste it.

"Get out." E's voice was low and void of energy. That nut took a lot out of him.

Violet remained in place, fixated on the jizz on her jacket.

"Babygirl," he called again. Violet looked up at him. His eyelids were heavy, but the look was sexy on him. He tilted his head and looked at her for a moment before shifting his head in the direction of the door. "You should leave."

"But I—," she started. He shook his head at her, silently telling her not to speak. In this moment, Violet didn't care about the waitress knowing who she was. All she cared about was staying with him. She knew what eight weeks without him was like and the yearning she felt for a man she'd only been around for a few hours was agonizing. And pitiful. She stood her ground—silently–for a few moments, hoping he'd demand the other woman to leave instead.

"Go," he told Violet once more. This time she finally turned to make her way to the door, but not before giving him a pout that she was completely oblivious of. Her feet were going one way, but her head was turned and looking at E. He kept eye contact with her until the hostess tugged on him.

"Why didn't you give me your cum?" the woman whined. "Wasn't I good for you?"

E let out a sigh, but it didn't feel like a frustrated one.

"We need to talk," he told the hostess as Violet reluctantly left them alone in her office again.

————————

I low key have no idea where this is going lol. It was a supposed to be a one shot. We’ll see what happens. Thanks for all the love on this series so far🖤