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lovelybrooke · 1 year

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Human Sully reader meeting the Metkayina Tribe.

This is how I would image the reader acclimating to the Metkayina.

Honestly, it was kind of a struggle to get the reader to Awa'atlu. While the Sully's definitely wanted to bring you, there was barley a discussion, they just knew they couldn't be without you.

However, Max and Norm didn't think it would be smart to take you with them. They knew the Metkayina wouldn't be too happy out a human being brought into their clan, so they didn't think it was safe for you.

At this point however, they didn't really have much of a say in where you go. Jake and Neytiri very much consider themselves your parents, so they feel as though they have complete authority over where you go. They knew they could take care of you, regardless of where they went. It was getting too dangerous in the forest, and Jake didn't want his family there anymore.

Like I said, there wasn't much discussion about you leaving with them, it just happened. Jake made sure to stock up on spare oxygen masks and any other things you needed before leaving. Since you didn't have an Ikran, you rode with Jake, even though it causes a fight between Lo'ak and Neteyam, who wanted you to ride with one of them.

It took a while, but once you arrived at Awa'atlu, you were instantly not welcomed. The Metkayina were not happy to see forest Na'vi, especially ones with demon blood. The moment they saw a human was brought along, they instantly wanted to send you all away, mainly Ronal. She was not a fan of humans due to what they had done to her people, and if it wasn't for Tonowari, you would've been killed right then and there.

It was safe to say that you were not welcomed in the clan. Even though your whole family wasn't welcomed, they eventually were able to become somewhat acclimated. You, however, were a human. You couldn't breathe long underwater, couldn't bond with an Ilu, and overall was completely isolated. Your siblings knew what you were going through, and always there for you. Kiri specifically would take you on walks around the shore so that you weren't stuck in the Marui.

It was during one of these walks that you met the younger Metkayina. Tsireya was very nice, which was a nice change of pace from the hatred you were getting from everyone else. Tsireya had this childlike curiosity towards you. She, unlike most other Na'vi, thought you were super interesting and quickly became close friends with you.

Tsireya was the one who introduced you to Aonung, who was not a fan of you. He, like he mother, hated the sky people, and didn't want them anywhere among his clan. He was smart enough not to mess with you in front of your siblings, but when you were alone, he did not hesitate to voice his hatred for you. He would pull your hair, prod at your body, poking fun at how small you were. He would even make fun of your poor Na'vi speak. He and his friends made a lot of your days miserable, but the worst was that you couldn't tell anyone about it due to the collective hatred surrounding you and your family.

Speaking of your family, you did a good job hiding the abuse you suffered from them. That was until Lo'ak got in a fight with him when he witnesses him messing with you, resulting in Jake getting upset. While he was happy his son was defending you, he knew he had an image to uphold, and attacking the chief's son was not a great way to gain the people's trust.

Aonung's bulling eventually died down, due to both Lo'ak and Tonowari. His father, while also not trusting of humans, knew that it was wrong what his son was doing. You were just a child and didn't deserve the treatment you were receiving, regardless of your heritage. Tonowari was more sympathetic to your plight and was grateful his daughter was there to befriend you.

Ronal despised you. She did not want you or your siblings anywhere near her children. She didn't understand Jake's and Neytiri's obsession with you, you were some random demons. In her mind, she saw you as someone trying to destroy her home. It didn't matter what Tsireya told her, in her mind she would never trust you.

Eventually, you were able to build a strong relationship with Tsireya she would take you out on her Ilu's and explore the reefs with you. Tsireya was more patient with you, knowing your limitations and would carefully guide you through the reefs and help you find pretty shells. Aonung did eventually become your friend but would still tease you, just not as much as before. Aonung and Lo'ak became your bodyguards, going everywhere with you. Lo'ak was always protective of you and was not afraid to hide it. Aonung was more embarrassed about protectiveness over you. He didn't understand, you were a sky person, a demon. There was no reason to be so hung up over you. But he couldn't help but become jealous when he saw you hanging out with one of the Sully children or with his sister. It all culminated with him basically demanding you to be his friend and ever since you were always with him.

Tonowari is a good father. A good mate. So, of course he feels bad when he sees you and feels a sense of yearning. He wonders if this is what Jakesully felt when he saw you for the first time. If he felt the same care and longing. He knows it's not right, to care so much about a demon, but he can't help it. Tonowari worries about you always and will always keep an eye on you whenever you travel into deep water with one of his children.

Regardless of how much he cares for you, he will never act upon it in respect for both his mate and Jakesully. He knows what fatherhood can do to a person and would never take that away from him. He instead, chooses to remain content protecting you from the sidelines and making sure no harm ever came to you.

A/n: Please send me any ideas you have for the Metkayina, I would love to hear it.

#yandere x reader #soft yandere #platonic yandere #yandere sully family #sully family x reader #sully family #yandere avatar way of water #avatar way of water x reader #yandere avatar #avatar way of water #avatar

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rendezvouz-fling · 1 year

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Astro observations #8

• Taurus suns with Virgo moons & Taurus risings were those people who when home alone would cook and then go eat in their rooms and stay in their beds all day watching funny/charismatic YouTubers like Lily Singh back in 2016-18.🌚

• Earth moons’ love language is softening up to people and sharing their food with them after they’ve made that person mad.

• Pisces suns with Earth moons especially Taurus moons have sweet earthy singing voices! • Also most people with Pisces in their big 6 especially Sun & Moon tend to be really good singers because they tend to start singing from a very young age specifically when they’re still toddlers. E.g. Michael Jackson (Pisces moon/rising) who first appeared on tv at 10-11 years old & Leon and Charmaine Sylvers (Pisces suns) who first toured with Ray Charles and sang on the Groucho Marx show while they were still little kids.

• Aquarius sun girls in school are either those popular girls who wear a lot of makeup, spray perfume on themselves and around them every 5 minutes, are unnecessary loud/pick me types and love taking selfies OR they are the outcasts who don’t wear makeup, are very friendly, chill & nonjudgmental, are somehow friends with everybody? And are usually seen as a little “weird” or “awkward” by the majority of other people. There is NO IN BETWEEN whatsoever.

• What’s up with underdeveloped Fire venuses and dating their siblings/friend’s crushes/ex’s?🧐 Like, they literally can’t know that you like somebody they’ll go fleeing to that person or if you’ve broken up with somebody they’ll go date/sleep with that person. Even if you have an old crush and you say you don’t like them anymore, these people WILL make sure they have SOME sort of connection to them.

• Nah because Fire/Water suns with Air moons when underdeveloped WILL use people, lmao. Fire suns/Air moons will come on strong, bold & fiery and best believe they’re the types to set people up or be nice & encouraging and then talk the most shit about them behind their backs. While Water suns will jump from friend to friend and be more secretive about their motives. They’ll also have a very much “Obliviously have people wrapped around my fingers.” type personalities and keep things cordial but then go and betray them.

• And if there’s ever a union between Water suns/Air moons and Fire suns/Air moons–while they’re both underdeveloped then the Water suns get charmed up and backstabbed while the Fire sun underestimates the Water sun then gets finessed!

• Underdeveloped Fire moons will think they're better than everybody and will dismiss others’ opinions/emotions if they don’t see fit. They also love to rub their underdeveloped knowledge in people’s faces but will also have little to no tactics and might overreact and end up breaking connections with people then regretting it later.

• Underdeveloped Air moons will think they know it all because they’re very mentally intellectual beings but they can exude very cocky “I’m better than you” and “you’re not on the same intellectual level as me so you can’t compete where you don’t compare” vibes and might play on sarcasm a lot! They’ll also ghosts their friends or isolate themselves then complain about being lonely. • Underdeveloped Earth moons will be overly possessive over their own and other people’s materialistic things and have a selfish “my way or the high way” demeanor anddd they will act greedy and hide things then be upset if they find out others ‘hid’ things from them. They’ll also call you out a lot even for the smallest things like the way your tone changed when you talked to them and will act super paranoid about getting things done.

• Underdeveloped water moons will play the victim in most situations at least 9 times out of 10. Even to the point of selfish pity party ranting that’s a completely twisted different version of the real story and they’ll go as far as crying theatrics in front of people while lying to them to manipulate others into being on their side and feeling sorry for them.

• Aries Mercury-Libra Mercury best friend duos are one of the best, hands DOWN!!! Although Aries mercuries tend to be more aggressive, energetic and straight to the point type people they teach Libra mercuries to be more upfront about voicing their ideals & concerns while Libra mercuries tend to show Aries mercuries that good mannerisms are more likely to get you places in the long run and they might also teach them about thinking things through more.

• Scorpio moons/mars parents love language is being harsh to their kids especially making fun of their sensitivity yet they’re emotionally immature themselves. They usually tend to have kids with Fire/Air mercuries!

• 5th house suns are so dramatic and I am so here for it!!😂

• 3rd house placements are very mentally active people and might be underestimated depending on their other placements but are very smart even if they have Pisces/Sag mercuries! Also into poetry and reading!

• Virgo sun Aquarius moon men will act like total fucking crackheads!! Even if they have a Virgo mercury—These people have NO CHIL!!😂😭

• Scorpio suns with Scorpio risings and Water risings in general tend to have the fakest friends that won’t hesitate to hurt them or belittle them. Some people don’t deserve to have you in their lives and it’s totally okay to cut people off gorgeous! <3

• Cancer suns with Capricorn sun mothers tend to not be too affectionate..

• Scorpio suns in the 5th house with Virgo moons are super expressive and tend to be either on paranoid overthinking-whole-existence mode or laid back hilarious storytelling mode. • 5H Scorpio suns are also tend to say funny stuff out loud out of nowhere too.😂

• Scorpio moons are very caring affectionate friends too, they’re the types to give you cute nicknames and always ask how you’re doing & they tend to be genuinely concerned if you’re not doing well. 💜

• We all need an inspirational Aries sun in our lives who will have our backs and be very loyal friends. They also give good advice and encourage you to come out of your shell more if you’re shyer then them. 😩❤️‍🔥

• Gemini placements 🤝 self sabotaging because of their overthinking issues.

• Taurus placements tend to be flat out truthful and sometimes bold people despite being shy especially risings!✨

• Scorpio suns with Sag moons>>>>

• Tbh all placements are equally important/relevant. I don’t get the tearing down certain placements and glorifying others when all placements have their pros & cons! Just because you’re a Cap/Aqua moon or a Scorpio moon doesn’t mean you’ll always have a bad or overly detached relationship with your mom. Or that you’re too ‘cold’ or have no feelings.🤨 Same goes for a lot of negatively stereotyped placements.

• Fire venuses 🤝 picking on/teasing/bullying their crushes.

• Water venuses 🤝 getting easily attached then not being able to properly let go of those people.

• Air venuses 🤝 falling for mentally active/funny/charismatic people in their friend circles.

• Earth venuses 🤝 going out of their ways to do little things for their partners.

#astro placements #astro observations #astro posts #astro community #astroblr #fire mercury #fire moon #water moon #water rising #air rising #air moons #earth moon #earth placements #water placements #rendezvous-fling

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kissesforsatoru · 1 year

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WANT YOU SO BAD | wc : 4.4k

BULLY! HANEMIYA KAZUTORA x FEM!READER

₊˚⌗ you hate him. you hate him. he ruined your life, so you should hate him. kazutoras specialty has always been getting his way by changing the minds of others, though.

⤷ cw : general yandere themes, vague bullying, social isolation and social anxiety, dub-con, semi-public sex, soft sex but also rough sex (???), oral (receiving), marking/love bites, dirty talk, teasing, degradation, praise, way too much kissing, kazutora being a bit of a sadistat first, then he gets soft, then he's back to being a sadist, slightly delusional reader (they’re kinda into it even though kazutora ruined their life)

notes : at long last, it's finished and at 2:21 am 😭 GUYS I HAVE TO BE UP EARLY TOMORROW BUT SOMETHING OVERCAME ME AND I JUST HAD TO FINISH THIS TONIGHT IDK

i honestly don't know how i feel about it, but whatever. i hope you guys are able to enoy this because it was honestly a bitch to write 😭

you anxiously gripped the hem of your shirt as you walked down the halls of your school, eyes cast down to focus on anything other than the fact that you were surrounded by lots of other students. you avoided getting too close to any of them, opting more to stay closer to the wall while simultaneously shrinking into yourself to look as small and unnoticeable as possible.

you didn't have to look to know where you were going, so to keep your anxiety addled brain at bay, you kept your eyes on your feet. one in front of the other, one in front of the other. you just wanted to get to class as quickly as possible and preferably without any sort of incident today.

as much as you had hoped and willed the whims of fate, every single day at that, nothing every favored you or what you wanted.

you bit your lip and turned your head to the side as you rounded a corner, bumping into someone as you did. all of the books and papers fell to the floor along with you, regrettably scattering everywhere. you whined weakly as tears welled in your eyes at the pain that shot throughout your body.

your lip quivers as you brace yourself with your hands, looking up at the person you'd run into—a boy, someone you weren't familiar with, though. he looked you over with a countenance of disgust before quickly turning to walk away, biting harshly to 'watch where the fuck you're going'.

you sighed, leaning over to collect your fallen things. your body shook as you moved around on the, still weakened from the impact of falling.

nobody stopped to help you—nobody even acknowledged you, for that matter. not that you expected anyone to, because ever since kazutora spread rumors about you nobody wanted anything to do with you. not even takemichi, who was usually so sweet to you. it was pathetic, really, how easily your life had come to ruin over one little mistake you made: underestimating how serious kazutora's threats were.

you were well aware he hated you from the moment the two of you met, he made that very clear, but you never knew how deeply that hatred was rooted. you didn’t know he was being serious when he told you to stay away from tekemichi, and now you’re here, very much aware, but it's far too late for it to even matter anymore. your reputation was trampled and ruined so effortlessly that nobody dared to associate themselves with you anymore—except for kazutora, who was the one person you actually wanted to leave you alone.

"hey!" a gruff voice called from behind you, and you tensed, eyes widening as you picked up your things faster. you could only hope that the voice wasn't calling for you as you stood up and practically ran down the hall, no longer caring about the pain or if you drew unnecessary attention to yourself. at this point, anything was better than whatever it was that kazutora wanted, because no matter what, it probably wasn’t good for you.

you gasped and once again all your things dropped to the floor as you were suddenly grabbed and shoved against a wall. you grimaced, looking away and sliding down to the floor as a pained sob escaped your lips. kazutora glared harshly down at you as he put his arms on either side of you, caging you in and blocking any chance you had at escaping--which would have been futile even if you did attempt to run again.

kazutora huffed at the sight before him, mocking you as you practically shivered in fear. nothing brought him more satisfaction than seeing you like this—completely helpless and at his mercy. he liked that panicked look in your eyes whenever you saw him, and he liked the way you anxiously shied away from him whenever he was close. it made him feel so powerful and superior.

kazutora doesn’t know why he liked it so much, because he’s never enjoyed this kind of thing outside of his delinquency, but the way you reacted to him drew him in and made him yearn to control you in every way. it was exhilarating, really.

"why the hell were you running away from me, y/n? i know you heard me calling." you flinched, falling further down the wall as a sob escaped your lips again. you wrapped your arms tightly around yourself, scratching your nails into your clothes as kazutora held your waist and gripped your chin.

he was close, far too close for your liking—though any distance from him wasn’t far enough for you, because no matter what, kazutora would always find you. it was like he had a leash wrapped around your neck, suffocating and inescapable. your many futile attempts to get away were pitiful and laughable at this point.

"fucking answer me, y/n." kazutora growled out slowly, his grip on your waist growing tighter with each second you remained silent. kazutora isn't a very patient man as it is, but whenever it came to you, he seemed all too pushy and demanding more than usual.

“i–i," you stutter pitifully, lip quivering as kazutora draws his face closer. "class–it… it starts soon." you spit out an excuse that you knew kazutora wouldn’t care for, but it was better than not saying anything.

he hums, grip loosening as he nods his head slowly. you almost sigh in relief, but you know better than to expect things to go off so simply. kazutora doesn’t care about class, or you getting there on time—your attendance records were proof enough of that. there had to be a catch of some sort, it was just a matter of figuring out what it was.

"you make a fair point, y/n. but you can't go to class looking like this…" he trails off, leaning back to rake his eyes steadily over your body. you wore a cute little skirt that came up to about mid thigh paired with a plain white shirt and light brown sweater vest on top. kazutora was more interested in the white knee high socks you were wearing, though. it made the outfit much more alluring, and dare he even say slutty.

kazutora grazed the soft skin of your exposed thigh with his finger tips while using his other hand to pull you closer by the waist. a little whimper escaped your mouth, and kazutora smirked as he saw how flustered you were getting.

kazutora’s never really touched you like this before, but he knew you were incredibly reactive to him anyway—always making small noises and gestures that were very telling of how you were feeling. he's always wondered how far he could take those reactions, and now he been given the opportunity to explore it thoroughly.

"kazutora, sto–mmh–stop." you choke out as you try to suppress the noises that threaten to spill from your lips. using one hand, kazutora pins your wrists to the wall while the other continues to feel you up. you can’t do anything as his cold fingers trace your skin salaciously with a certain slowness that makes you shiver under his touch.

"y/n… '' kazutora calls your name teasingly. "you’re dressed so slutty, you know? how can you expect me to control myself?" the question was met with watering eyes and a small whimper. for the first time since kazutora had ruined your life, you dared to look him in the eyes. it caught him off guard; his movements pausing and breath catching in his throat as he stared into your teary eyes—kazutora was pretty damn sure he might’ve just fallen in love again.

you were so fucking pretty. everything about you was just so captivating and attractive.

small noises escaped your lips as you wordlessly pleaded with him, but it was clear to kazutora that you weren’t exactly sure what it was you were pleading for.

he smirked, releasing your hands only to pick you up entirely to walk somewhere that you can only assume nobody will find you. you wrap your arms around him hesitantly, sniffling and biting your lip as you rest your chin on his shoulder. his grip tightened ever so slightly as you began to relax in his arms. you don’t know what’s happening, but honestly you don’t have the strength to question kazutora right now.

it didn’t take kazutora long to get to his destination, which you figured out was the gym supply closet after he sits you down on one of the cold mats.

a weird feeling in your stomach made you shiver as you shyly grabbed the hem of your shirt. kazutora spread your legs, shoving his larger body in between them while placing his hands on either side of you again. he was close, still too close for your comfort, but you weirdly felt okay with it now—the intention was different, now more of a hungry lust rather than aggression.

you flinched when you felt a hand press against your cheek and then a few seconds later a muffled gasp left your mouth when you felt soft lips press against yours. you place both your hands on kazutoras chest, not to push him away per se, but to ease the pressure of his lips against yours that were all too hungry and consuming.

you don't pull away either, despite being a little but confused and definitely scared. instead you allow kazutora to lead the kiss while you hesitantly following along—tried to at least, because you were sloppy with it. kazutora doesn’t seem to mind though since he doesn’t pull away and complain like you expected him to.

and inkling of doubt and worry slowly consume you as the kiss drags on, because this could full well just be another one of kazutora’s sick jokes. yet, there was a part of you, the part that kept you from thrashing and demanding to be let go, that wanted to believe that wasn't the case.

kazutora finally pulls away when your rhythm begins to slow and your body grows limp. soft little pants fill the room as you try to catch your breath, still holding tightly onto kazutora’s shirt that you ended up grabbing in the midst of the kiss. kazutora admires the look on your face in the meantime, all flushed and dazed like you’d just taken some sort of addictive drug that gives you a pleasure high. kazutora likes that thought—you being addicted to his kisses.

after a few minutes, kazutora pushes you down flat on the mat and crawls on top of your body. bracing both arms on either side of your head, and his knee between your legs, kazutora traps you beneath him. smirking as he leans down, kazutora revels in the sound of your whimper.

"you look so lewd, y/n. is this what you wanted, hm? for me to fuck you senseless for being a little slut in that outfit you've got on?" kazutora whispers against your neck, the warmth of his breath on your skin causing you to squirm. you turn your head away, embarrassed by his words.

"yeah, that's definitely what you wanted. you were practically begging me to fuck you with your pretty eyes earlier." kazutora licked the shell of your ear, nibbling gently at the top, dragging an airy gasp from your lips.

"no–mhph, please!" salty tears begin to steadily drip down your cheeks and between your parted lips, causing you to choke on your pleas. kazutora grabs your face and tilts your head so that he can lick away your tears.

"shh, you’re such a good girl, so pretty for me." he whispers as he starts rubbing your thighs again. he goes slow, more focused on intently watching you—the way you struggle to catch your breath and how your body continues to shiver ever so slightly as he drags his fingers along your skin lightly. every small noise that leaves your lips doesn’t go unnoticed by kazutora, and neither do any of your cute expressions. he takes them all in and commits them to memory, no doubt to think of when he jacks off when he's at home later.

“just wanna touch you a bit and make you feel good,” he whispers between licks and kisses to your tear stained cheeks.

you feel as kazutora trails his fingers over your body, spending extra time in the areas that make you gasp and whine. your body is all hot and all tingly, practically pulsating with pleasure as you squirm in anticipation of where he’ll touch you next. maybe your neck, where you’re most sensitive, or your thighs that were mushed against kazutoras leg in a desperate attempt to keep your wetness at bay. and while you would enjoy him touching you in those areas, you really hoped it would be in the place that you ached most for him, which was the one place he seemed to avoid.

your breath grows quick and ragged as kazutora drags his finger slowly between your breasts and down your tummy, continuing until he reaches the hem of your skirt where he stops to flick it up and reveal your already soaked underwear. an airy moan-like gasp leaves your lips when he suddenly presses his thumb onto your fluttering cunt.

“that’s right, little baby. you like that, don’t you?” he coos, tracing your bud teasingly a few times before rubbing it with a little more force. you close your eyes and nod curtly with a groan, much more focused on the way his thumb teases your pussy in all the right ways.

kazutora huffs at your reaction and pulls his fingers away, which draws a needy whine from you at the loss of contact. he shuts you up with another kiss, one that lasts only a few seconds as he's pulling away to kiss your cheek, then along your jaw and down to your neck where he sucks lightly in a few places.

he licks, sucks and kisses down the rest of your body, only stopping to take off your sweater vest and undershirt before he leans back down with desperation to kiss you more. he bites teasingly on your collarbone and licks his way down from your chest to your left breast that he latches onto easily. he sucks softly as he swirls his warm tongue around the bud, coaxing another sweet moan out of you, along with the many more to follow. you thread your fingers through his hair and tug on it gently whenever you jolt in pleasure.

kazutora pops off your nipple, licking it one last time, then he tilts his head and settles his mouth on the neglected one, intent on giving it the same attention. you begin to pant softly, hot and bothered by kazutoras stimulation. he suddenly bites your bud and tugs on it for just a second, causing you to arch your back and wrap your legs tightly around kazutoras waist. your wet cunt brushes against kazutoras hard cock, and he groans against your tit.

"mmh– ka–kazutora!" you moan, and you can feel as he smirks against your skin with a huff. he then pulls away, to which you whine, but he shuts you up with a kiss for the second time.

your tongues swirl together and drool seeps from both of your mouths. kazutora was determined to learn each and every part you you and engrave it permanently into his memory. he wants to know exactly what makes you feel good, what tips you over the edge and makes you scream out as your body convulses with pleasure. he wants to make you feels so good that you a cry and pass out, and he'll do just that.

kazutora pulls away and admires the way your tong lolls out of your mouth as you lean up to chase his lips. he coos, grabbing your chin to tilt your head up so he can place his tongue against yours; you squirm and whine beneath him in response.

your breath hitches and you make a strained noise when kazutora's fingers trace down your thigh and between your leg to press against your aching pussy lightly. you're even more wet now, and it has kazutora cursing beneath his breath as he feels his cock throb uncomfortably. he ignores it in favor of putting a bit more pressure on your clit, watching the way you shutter as he then begins to rub on it just a little bit--not enough for you to feel satisfied, apparently, because you buck and wiggle your hips to create more friction.

kazutora hums and lets you try to please yourself, but a lazy smile graces his lips when you quickly grow restless from the lack of pleasure you were receiving in your pursuit. you huff and whine, flicking your big, watery eyes to kazutora to give him a pleading look, but he only continues to watch you pitifully chase the little pleasure you got from your movements.

"please," you eventually mutter out in a half whine.

"hm? what was that? you have to speak up, pretty," he says lowly, tilting his head. you huff and whine some more out of frustration and kazutora's smile stretches wider.

"please," you repeat, this time louder, "want you to touch me," you decidedly add.

kazutoras smile is now a full-blown smirk as he eagerly pulls your panties off of you, putting your pussy on full display to him. pretty and all slicked up, practically begging to be eaten like a full course fucking meal. he doesn't touch you yet, though. instead, he grabs both your wrists to pins above your head, while with the other hand he spreads your legs further and slides his body down yours until his face is right in line with your cunny.

the warmth of his breath against your sensitive clit makes you mewl in anticipation. you moan loudly into the air and throw your head back when kazutora finally—finally—licks a stripe from your seeping hole to your puffy clit. then he does it again, and again, and again until he's slurping sloppily as he laps up all of your slick desperately, like a man starved.

you cry, whine, moan, and sputter any possible noise that you can as he mercilessly eats you out, letting go of your wrists to wrap his arms around your legs and hold you against his mouth as you try to buck and ease the pressure his tongue puts on your pussy. he latches onto your clit after he's satisfied with drinking up your wetness, sucking on it gently and swirling his tongue over it every now and then. he's driving you crazy; it feels so good, so, so good, but you're greedy—you want more.

“ahah— mmh, kazu–kazutora” you moan his name so sweetly; there’s a high-pitched, whiney edge to it when you do that makes you sound utterly wreck—it drives kazutora mad with hazy lust—makes him hold you down against the mat more firmly as he presses his tongue so expertly against your clit, drawing from you more delicious moans of his name.

he smirks against you as you come easily undone, and his eyes flick up to catch your pretty eyes roll back as your mouth falls wide open, a broken, yet completely enthralling slew of noises fall from between your bruised lips as you orgasm. kazutora doesn’t pull away though, despite the way your grip on his hair has becomes unrelenting from the overstimulation being forced upon your poor, spent body; he only does when you sob weakly and begin to pant heavily.

kazutora releases your hips and pulls himself up so that he’s hovering above you. you look so fucking perfect like this—fucked out, from just his mouth, drool seeping from the corner of you parted lips.

“fuck, baby. you’re such a naughty girl, huh?” he asks, but you don’t respond. he doesn’t expect you to anyway considering the kind of state you’re in; it’s no wonder that all you can do is whine and tug on kazutoras shirt like a needy fucking slut. he leans down to kiss you softly, simply enjoying how pliant you are for him right now. you kiss him back messy and lazy, but it doesn’t matter. kazutora doesn’t mind doing all of the work for the both of you.

when he pulls away, you're practically asleep, lying limp on the mat, eyes fluttering between opened and closed as you breathe airily. kazutora won't allow you to slip away though, not until he's done fucking you senseless.

you gasp, yes widening as you quickly sit up after you feel something penetrate you. kazutora smirks as he works a finger into you slowly, tauntingly, watching your face carefully. he lets you catch your breath for a second before he pulls out and plunges his finger back in, and oh, you breathe so enchantingly as his long fingers reach deeply inside of you.

he keeps his eyes on you as he stuffs you with a second and then a third finger, watching intently as you gape your mouth and your eyes begin to water--it's too much, he gathers, but continues nonetheless. his fingers and mouth are nothing compared to his cock, so you'll have to get used to it.

kazutora only pulls his fingers out when your walls begin to tighten around him, indicating that you're close to another orgasm; he wants the next time you cum to be around his cock. kazutora pulls his fingers out and licks his fingers clean, to which you fluster over, before he takes off his clothes. he hisses as he grabs his painfully hard cock, stroking it a few measly times as he crawls back over you and aligns himself to your entrance. he slips in just the tip, and the moan that escapes your pretty mouth is just as sweet as the rest of them.

he hungrily leans down to swallow the rest of your moans that follow as he slides himself all the way in. you grab his shoulders with a jolt as the tears finally begin to slowly drip down your already tear stained face. kazutora holds your chin in place while he drags his tongue along your cheeks, drinking up every tear that spills from your pretty eyes like a man that's been dehydrated.

kazutoras base presses firmly against you at last, and with a strained groan, he pulls out and then pushes back in, this time with a little more force then before. you clench around him, mewling so innocently, unbeknownst to the amount of control kazutora has left--it's a miracle that he does have any left when you're sprawled out on full display for him, but if you keep making those noises and fluttering around him so generously, he may full well end up fucking you like a rabid animal, and that is not what he wants at all—not for your first time at least.

trust him, he would more than love to hold you down and pound himself bruising into you until he's satisfied, but right now he just wants to hold you in his arms as he pleases you, take his time with it and make you feel loved. the threads of his patience are wearing, though.

you throw your heard back as kazutoras hips connect with yours, demanding and desperate, yet gentle in intention. every little movement he makes has you squirming in pleasure, eyes glassy, lips plump, and tongue lulled out of your mouth like a dumb cock-drunk whore. it's a sight that has kazutora shuddering and groaning lowly into your ear, which only does to make you more like putty in his hold. it feels so unbelievably good to have his body above you, caging you in as he fucks you steadily; it makes you want to cling onto him and beg for more, more, more, because you will never be able to get enough of it.

"fu—mmh—fuck, please! tora, tora i need it— need you," you babble on, writhing as that familiar coil in your stomach makes itself known. he smirks lazily above you, eyes hooded—there's a darkness to them now that wasn't there just a second ago, you note.

"hell, you sound like a proper whore, y/n. are you really that fucking cock hungry?" you choke on a moan at his words, but mostly due to the sharp thrust he does against your sopping cunt. you nod pathetically, slurring 'yes, yes,' even though his question was rhetorical. he snorts with a shake of his head as he leans down to nibble on your neck, no doubt leaving a mark, then he trails his nose up until you can feel the warmth of his breath on your ear.

"yeah, that's fuckin' right. who's making you feel this good?" he whispers and your thighs clench around his legs to keep even more slick from seeping onto them.

"you, you're," you say breathily, words slurred from the amount of overstimulation and pleasure you're feeling. a whine breaks from your lips when kazutora slows down and holds your wiggling hips in place.

"say my fuckin' name, call me tora or i won't let you cum, pretty baby," he growls, biting your neck in warning.

"you're makin' me feel so—hah—so good, tora," you choke on a weird moan-like sob when he shifts, sending a jolt through your body. "please, tora, don't stop. want you to make me cum," you finish, and he curses lowly into your neck. you sigh in content when he begins to thrust again. there's a little more force than before, but it drives you mad as your body pulsates with heat every time he drags his cock out and then straight back in.

"don't you ever fucking forget it," he mouths, almost high-pitched and whiney, "'m the only one that can fuck you like this, understand? you belong to me."

one of the hands on your hips comes to cup your clit, just for a second and then two of his fingers are rubbing on it at a pace that has you convulsing and crying in pleasure as you orgasm a second time. you call his name over and over again, once for every thrust that meets your hips, and you tug on his shoulders to bring him impossibly closer to your body.

kazutora curses and quickly pulls out of you before he cums, the warm liquid splattering on your heaving tummy, and he collapses on top of you, the both of you panting hotly as you come down from your pleasure highs.

#yandere #yandere thoughts #yandere imagines #yandere x you #yandere tokyo revengers #yandere tokrev #yandere tokrev x reader #yandere tokyo revengers x reader #yandere bully #yandere bully kazutora #yandere kazutora #yandere kazutora x reader #yandere kazutora hanemiya #yandere kazutora hanemiya x reader #yandere tokyo rev #yandere tokyo rev x reader #yandere tr

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anassemblageofpassions · 29 days

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Honestly repo man showed the difference between sam and dean’s hell trauma better than nearly anything else could have and shows how neither of them will ever exactly ‘understand’ one another’s experiences.

Because deans abuse was not personalized the way Sam’s was. It was very much black and white, pure horror, pure pain, no room for grey. It was horrific. It was 30 years of being tortured and 10 years of torturing. It seems to have been mostly physical, with I’m sure plenty of verbal abuse.

Lucifer’s torture of sam was personal on every level. It was an undisclosed, impossible amount of time spent torturing sam in every way, physically, mentally. Lucifer knows every inch of sam. He and sam have been each other. And while sam hates and is traumatized by it on every level, he’s also bound to it, to him. There are shades of grey.

At the end of the day, dean has no bond to Alastair other than victim and pupil. He’s able to get out of hell with no warm feelings towards him whatsoever. At the end of repo man, dean is utterly incapable of understanding Jeffrey’s relationship to the demon, and callously blurts off ableist rhetoric at his actively hallucinating brother.

But Sam understands Jeffrey. He understands wanting your abuser, even loving him on some level. He understands understands loving being possessed. Sams mind literally could not function without some version of Lucifer around to be a presence in his life so it literally created one for him.

And I think this serves to isolate sam even further from dean, I think it’s the final straw that makes sam “want” Lucifer. Because he doesn’t have dean, he doesn’t have a “stone number one” who could ever understand his point of view. The only one who does is Lucifer. And that knowledge is enough to finally make Sam’s mind decides to amp it up, decide that it’s time to die, because he is truly, truly alone in this reality. He cannot live without Lucifer because he has to live without dean. Dean will never understand.

And I think that fundamentally is a big part of why we see the beginnings of Sam’s quieter demeanor from now on, and possibly a part of why he didn’t actively look for a way to resurrect dean. Season 7 is about completely isolating sam from everyone. And this isolation remains for the rest of the show.

And that’s the thing, from season 4 onward sam and dean fundamentally do not quite understand each other anymore. Oh they know each other better than anyone (except Lucifer on Sam’s part), they do get each other, but at their core they do not understand each other. Sam cannot understand what Dean went through, more torture than he could comprehend, and dean cannot understand what sam went through, because he experienced more torture than the human mine can comprehend and it was so fundamentally different. Sam is bonded to Lucifer in a way dean was not to Alastair.

And this misunderstanding drives the remaining conflicts of the series. Dean cannot live without sam, he would do anything to bring him back, sam can live without dean because he understands that he is alone in a way that dean doesn’t, he can abide by their promise to one another in a way dean could not. Dean doesn’t understand Sam’s complicated relationship with possession and its association with personalized abuse, he doesn’t understand how violating gadreel is.

Neither sam nor dean see themselves as people, but where sam sees himself as a someone else’s possession, dean sees himself as a weapon. Even in how their respective titles as vessels, dean is Michael’s sword while sam is Lucifer’s true vessel. Dean is a weapon, Sam is an empty shell. And season 9 illustrates that fundamental difference, sam yet again as a vessel for someone else, dean becoming the ultimate weapon with the mark of Cain. Dean became a weapon in hell, and sam became whatever Lucifer wanted him to be. Dean spends the rest of the show a weapon and sam spends the rest of the show molding himself to whatever others need him to be while simultaneously being no one. A vessel and a weapon.

And then Dean gets a hint of personalized abusive connection with amara. Dean gets possessed. And then he realizes he’s not in control of his own life. Late seasons dean is realizing what sam learned long ago. And he fights kicking and screaming to regain that semblance of control that he always had, a fight sam already fought in season 4 and 5. They still don’t understand each other. They still react in such fundamentally different ways.

And it also all comes down to how they were raised. Dean a weapon, Sam a vessel. John a weapon, Mary a vessel. And despite all of that, he developed his own sense of self Dean never had. So in a way, supernatural is about dean having accepted himself as a weapon from the start and ending the show viewing himself as a person. Sam starts the show viewing himself as a person and ends it as a vessel. Maybe it’s something he escapes in those years after deans death. But I’m inclined to doubt it, at least truly.

Sam and Dean love each other more than anything, but they will never understand one another, and that chasm only grows as the show goes on. Even after dean goes through some of Sam’s experiences, and even after sam goes through some of deans, neither of them will understand. At their core it is how they were raised, how they were created and conceptualized.

In the end, it comes down to chucks finale quote: “dean Winchester, the ultimate weapon.” And he doesn’t add anything for sam winchester. The ultimate vessel.

#supernatural #sam winchester #dean winchester #this kinda went off the rails #spn meta #but yeah I hope this makes sense #my meta

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marinetteplztakeabreak · 11 months

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The arc with the resistance in ml season five???? Is so good????????????? The way that???? Its been going on low-key for a while????? But theres this Massive Shift this season where literally the entire miracuclass stops running away from akumas or hiding???? And its like???? The fear is GONE by the end of the season???? Theyre not scared anymore theyre just pissed off????? At the system???? Not at the akumatized victims???? But also its not a “babying the akumas” thing either like when gabe is akumatized theyre like “WRONG BAD” at him????? Same with chloé???? But like the entire class will see a butterfly and start running TOWARDS it because theyre like “oh no someone needs help goddamit i gotta get there before hawkmoth” and they dont always win and they dont beat themselves up about it???? Like in confrontation, Juleka got akumatized despite their best efforts and theyre all like “ugh this sucks” but no one’s giving up hope or anything???????

And!!!!! The way that the anti-akuma charms work in that episode??????!?!??!?? The way the fandom has this trend of thinking like,,,, the only way to escape akumas is to push emotions away deep deep down,,,, thats how marinette and adrien have kind of been operating?!???? But then it’s revealed on no uncertain terms that the powerups of the anti akuma charms are reactive to emotions?????!?! That pushing things down doesnt help?? you have to Fight Back and FEEL on your own terms and accept others’ help and feelings?????

Juleka shutting down and curling up into a ball and trying to disapear didnt work!!!but her yelling about how its not fair and shes proud of mr damocles despite it all???? like??? Catalyzed the entire anti akuma charm shield thing???????

The way that this season has shown time and again that it’s okay to be mad and frustrated and hate the system and its okay to feel trapped and scared but you have to learn to reach out and find a good outlet for those emotions even if that outlet is yelling with your friends???? instead of isolating yourself and pushing away people who have your best interest at heart????? And lying and pretending it’s okay doesn’t help but looking for bits of real joy and support amidst the chaos does???

The way that ladybug and chat noir started this season as The Most Alone Theyve Ever Been with the miracle box stolen??? and realized by the end that no one needs powers to be heroes??? they just need to be able to trust each other and take turns carrying Hope for the group and remembering whats worth fighting for!? and as long as theres a drive to fight theres always little victories to celebrate??????????!??

(Also the way that Nino—who heads the resistance—literally calls everyone in his group including Bustier Comrade and the way that they talk about how sometimes it feels like no one’s listening and revolution is the only way?? and the way they address fears about spyware and technology only benefitting the elites and the school system being designed without students’ well-being in mind and environmental terror and the police being corrupt and they take all of that and they say “it is Still a worthy battle and it sucks but you are going to be okay,,, just do not give in to hopelessness… find the people who will help you keep fighting and keep believing in a better future and Cherish Them”)

People complain about this show going “off the rails” as it’s switching its target audience and addressing more “mature” themes or whatever but like do you guys understand how much every single narrative decision makes me scream

#ml spoilers #ml s5 spoilers #nino lahiffe

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nerdyenby · 8 months

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Seasons one and early two are Lloyd being a kid and getting to be a brat sometimes.

Late season two through season seven are Lloyd being forced to grow up too quick and not allowing himself to process literally anything, devoting his entire being to becoming who destiny told him to be.

Seasons eight through ten are Lloyd having literally having all of his trauma shoved back in his face but worse. Not to mention his dead dad isn’t dead anymore, isn’t his dad anymore, and is trying to kill him, whilst 83% of his support system is presumed dead. Also the girl who emotionally abused him dies for realsies.

Seasons eleven through fifteen are Lloyd trying to figure out how to address all the shit he’s been through without letting it consume him. It’s him leaning on his friends, allowing himself to confide in others and finally acknowledging how much that stuff fucked him up. It’s him accepting that the world can be cruel and it’s him choosing to believe that people can still be good. It’s him learning to trust again, and it’s him allowing himself to feel his hurt while still finding a way to live in spite of it.

Crystallized is Lloyd giving up. Everything he has he loses, everyone he loves leaves — by choice or otherwise. Just like Kai, he internalizes this loss by rationalizing that he wasn’t good enough to save them. He walks away. He tries to live a normal life for a bit. It isn’t enough. He can’t not do anything. He can’t leave the family he’s found, the family that found him. No matter how much it hurts to lose them, he will never stop fighting to find them again. Even if he has to face everything he hates and fears about himself, even if he has to confront the man that was once his father, even if he has to willingly step into what he fears most — letting his anger and hurt consume him, becoming just another perpetuator of violence and loss — he will never stop fighting to protect those he loves. He can’t cross that line. He could if he wanted to, but he can’t and he never will, but loss of any kind is not something Lloyd is willing to take sitting down.

And then in the Merge, Lloyd loses everyone all over again. He’s entirely and undeniably alone for the first time in years, but why does it feel so familiar? He’s mourned so many loved ones so many times, but why does this feel so different? But he’s not alone, not entirely. The others could still be out there, and there are still people to be saved. Loss is an old friend of his, but she never sticks around. In spite of it all, Lloyd keeps living. He keeps fighting and he keeps loving. He stays isolated in the monastery, but the doors stay open. He’s learned to keep his heart open, even when heavy with loss. He continues to look for his family and he continues help people where he can. He remembers how lost he has been, how lost he once was, with nowhere and no one to call home, and he will never give up until no one is ever that alone ever again. Lloyd has lost so much, but he’s learned to never stop letting people in. Arin and Sora remind him so much of himself — two kids left to fend for themselves, no family to be found but each other, unnoticed by the world at large until their potentials show themselves — and there was never a world in which Lloyd didn’t take them in with open arms.

Was written in response to this post by @alizibtheterrible but it quickly got out of hand and I didn’t want to hijack their post lol

#ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago dragons rising #lloyd garmadon #*candace voice* MOOOOOOOOM NERDY’S BEING ABNORMAL ABOUT LEGO NINJAGO AGAIN #nerdy’s ninjago rambles

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gartenofbanny · 10 months

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Let's talk about something different today. Jasper from Steven Universe is my favorite antagonist and I'm just going to casually explain why. So starting off with why I love her as an antagonist is that, Jasper is a huge threat, while she wasn't really much of an active threat she was still a huge threat ngl.

In her debut episode, Jasper managed to solo the Crystal Gems, poofing the strongest gem (at the time) Garnet and imprisoning the two other gems, Pearl and Amethyst while knocking out Steven in the process. When I first saw that when I was a kid, I was REALLY surprised because the crystal gems are extremely powerful in their own right but realizing that one gem took down the crystal gems with minimal effort shows how threatening Jasper is and how more threatening Homeworld as a whole is.

While Jasper was later on defeated by Garnet, it's still impressive because no other gem in Season 1 was really able to hold off Garnet, who was the strongest crystal gem at that time. So it takes a fusion between two gems to defeat Jasper which was shown consistently throughout Steven Universe. Not to mention the iconic battle in Steven Universe that somehow has fewer views on YouTube than the Undertale parody lmao. 💀

But then we move on to Steven Universe Future. After training a teenage Pink Steven for a while, Jasper with no hesitation fights him after Pink Steven challenges her. Let it be known that Pink Steven was gaining powers from his mom's gem who is Pink Diamond and despite the fact that Jasper was shattered in the end, she was still able to hold her own against a Diamond essentially.

Jasper is definitely the strongest lone gem I've seen since she's able to mop the floor with other ordinary gems and only loses against Fusions or Diamonds. But it would be really interesting to see her fight against Spinel or Bismuth.

Another reason why I like Jasper is that to me, she's a foil to the three main characters Steven, Garnet, and Amethyst.

Jasper is big, tough, and strong while Amethyst is small, not as durable as Jasper, and definitely not as strong as her. Jasper is the perfect version of Amethyst, physically even Jasper points out multiple times in "Crack the Whip" and "Earthlings".

She constantly looks down on and berates Amethyst for being physically inferior to her, but Jasper doesn't have the meaningful relationships that Amethyst has. So Jasper has power, but no friends, and due to her lack of teammates she always loses against others who have teammates.

In Garnet's case, Jasper forces gems to fuse with her in order to become more powerful which can hurt the gem she's fusing with in the process and even herself. Garnet is a fusion out of the love of two gems and she's able to handle that form for a long amount of time as opposed to Jasper who was able to withstand a fusion with a corrupted gem for like a few minutes at most.

Jasper does not know that fusion requires consent or love, when she fuses with another gem she's essentially using them to gain power which led to gems not wanting to fuse with her or forcing themselves out of the fusion with her.

Steven's case, she's a foil to his belief that everyone can change. Jasper in Steven Universe Future was the only character who for the most part did not change, she still remained a gem who worshipped their diamond regardless of the other gems aren't doing so anymore, she still remained violent and alone because she trained nonstop in a forest in isolation, and she still viewed power over everything.

She's also the opposite of Steven in one way because she tells Amethyst "Fighting is my life!" And Steven Universe isn't much of a fighter more like a pacifist.

So yeah that's really why I love Jasper and why she's my favorite antagonist in Steven Universe as a whole...but there is one thing I will say that I don't really like.

I don't like the fact that Jasper was brought back from being shattered just to do nothing after she was shattered. It immediately removed the tension that Gems can be erased due to the fact that Steven was able to repair and revive Jasper hours after he shattered her.

It would've really been disturbing if they just kept Jasper shattered because not only is the danger of shattering still..dangerous, but it will also somewhat work thematically with Jasper's character. Jasper is the only gem who didn't change their violent tendencies from the start and because of that, Jasper's fate couldn't be changed after she was shattered. But then again SU Future also showed that Yellow Diamond was able to repair shattered gems so it's possible that Steven doesn't even need the essence of all the diamonds to repair a shattered gem.

Would I be sad if Jasper stayed dead? Definitely, but it was pretty underwhelming to see her again just not do anything after she was repaired but then again what could she have done when she was repaired? Y'know?

Anyway, that's all for today. Thank you all for reading and I hope you all have a nice day! ❤️

#steven universe #su #steven universe jasper #jasper #antagonist analysis #villain analysis #steven universe criticism #steven universe critique #jasper steven universe

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duckiemimi · 9 months

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Hi!!! i hope i'm not bothering you with this but i really like your thoughts and reasoning about jjk especially the last chapter, i recently saw this post and i was wondering what you thought about it.

https://twitter.com/gurokenn/status/1705203046597132589?s=19

oh, this was such an interesting read!

now if we strictly go by the nature of his character (especially when he was younger), i would somewhat agree. op made great points about the perception of power between two of the most powerful characters in jjk. they’re similar in so many ways!

though i’d argue that gojo did not become powerful because he consciously developed a complete sense of self; he was born with power (both politically and physically), and so that complete sense of self came naturally, along with the isolation and alienation. he didn’t have to work to shift the balance of the world. we don’t know much about sukuna when he was a sorcerer, but perhaps he had to consciously work towards a sense of self, and that’s why he was able to explain it to jogo so succinctly in that particular scene. this chapter is the first time gojo ever talked about the distance between everyone and him and though he said it so casually, there’s an underlying sense of frustration or regret behind those words.

i also don’t necessarily agree that gojo only worried about himself—i’ve made so many posts about this (this is one of them), but the way he expresses care is different from the people around him because of that distance of power between everyone and him. he does care. his love for people (geto, his students, his friends) is his biggest weakness (and strength!) and it’s been shown time and time again. the chains that bind him to the system are, as well (i made a post about how even without it, it must be difficult for him to see himself out of the box they’ve built around him), but he could’ve grown past them, especially with the system virtually being nonexistent now.

it’s why i found this panel frustrating because is that really what you wanted to do?

it felt like character regression, in a way, because i assumed that in the scene after the timeskip (where everyone pat his back), he’d finally realized that he was never really alone. but these recent lines imply that he still felt alone and out of everyone, he chose sukuna (sukuna! possessing his protégé’s body!) to connect with. did you learn nothing from the timeskip we were so conveniently given? are you that desperate for connection that you forgot all the other connections you’ve forged throughout your life, and especially the ones you rekindled after being unsealed?

“sorcerers are supposed to die without regret.” i think this line isn’t supposed to be read quite literally because there’s so much subtext behind it. they die like this not to push themselves to the limit, not to test their powers. they die like this because their life spans are short. this career path isn’t for people who have attachments. it’s for disposable machine parts because once you die on that battlefield, someone will replace you without even time to spare for your own funeral. it’s an allegory for our real world. (i made a post semi-explaining my thoughts about this here and here.)

to make gojo die with only the realization that he’s not the strongest, albeit poetic, should not be his conclusion. being the strongest (singular) should not even be important anymore. why would you foster allies if that was the case? why were you so hungry for change before?

anyway, i think op made a lot of interesting points that made me think and i have to agree with sukuna’s characterization! but the difference between gojo and sukuna’s characters is that sukuna is a human who became a “god” while gojo was born a “god” who wanted to become human.

#this is a little messy im sorry #jjk #jjk leaks #jjk 236 #gojo satoru #gojo #sukuna #jujutsu kaisen #asks

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mmhcs · 10 months

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Sun Comes Out Again

Miles Morales x PTSD!Reader

Foreword: I know that everyone’s experience is different but these are just my headcannons of how I think 1610!Miles would handle a partner with trauma

Warnings: Mentions of PTSD (uncomfortable feelings, mood swings, unhealthy coping mechanisms, etc.)

When (and if) you tell him, Miles, while shocked, tries not to let that be the only emotion he conveys in the moment. He tries his best to listen, letting you explain the situation, your feelings, etc.

To be really honest, he's just been under the impression that you're anxious (like him) about making sure the relationship is going well and that the other feels loved and appreciated.

Miles knows a lot about mental health, but he also doesn't really know a lot about mental health. Like, don't get me wrong, he's most definitely an emotionally intelligent guy and he's the number one advocate for mental health, especially that of his fellow Black boys. But when it comes to learning about the specifics of how to deal with triggers and flashbacks...He's still some ways to go. But, despite not knowing everything, Miles tries his best.

Despite him having Spider-sense, Miles is not a mind-reader. (I mean, have you seen the movies? He's emotionally intelligent but you have to remember that his brain mainly thinks when necessary). He notices your shifts in mood, yes, but you have to communicate with him. If you tell him what you want or need, he'll try his best to give it to you.

^You need reassurance? He'll make it a point to start slipping in more compliments and reminders that he's so thankful and grateful to have you in his life. You feel anxious and like the world is too big? Depends. If you want company, he'll sit with you, put something on and just sit with you. No words need to be exchanged. However, if you want to be alone? That's cool, too. He'll probably send a text or two (the first just saying that he hopes you're okay and that you'll get through this, the latter being a good night text where he emphasizes the same thing).

For my readers that tend to isolate themselves: he's okay with you needing your space. But Miles knows that difference between when you're not at 100% and need some time and when you're purposefully isolating yourself as a punishment, self-harm, because you feel unloveable, etc.

^If you tend to isolate yourself, Miles won't force you to do anything that feels uncomfortable or too much for you. If anything, he'll simply come over (or invite you over to his place) and go about his business while you do your thing. If you're up for doing anything, however, then you best believe that he's making plans, getting ready, texting his parents, saying that he might not be home for dinner...No matter the circumstance, he just wants you to know that you're worthy of love and shouldn't have to go through what you're going through alone.

Miles tries his best not to take anything personally. Like, if you two are cuddling and suddenly you don't want to be touched anymore or it all feels like too much and you want to be alone, it's not biggie to him. He'll find other things to do (draw, bake, annoy his parents and/or friends at the Spider Society).

Miles hates seeing you depressed. When he sees you like that, he feels sad (he's a Certified Empath, okay?). He wants to make you feel better and take away all your sadness but he knows that it doesn't work like that. So, he does the next best thing and helps you power through it.

^Asks if you've taken your medication, does regular checkups to see how you're doing, encourages you to go out, do your hair, dress up, be happy or, alternatively, encourages you to cry, wallow, be angry, take a break. He's very big on feeling what you're feeling and letting it out.

^^ Supports you on your healing journey. If you decide to go on medication, he's cheering you on, sitting beside you as you weigh the pros and cons, giving you advice and suggestions. If you (also) go to therapy, he's sure not to schedule dates that interfere with appointment times, reminds you of your upcoming appointments (I would say who needs a calendar when you have Miles but he probably uses the calendar to remember your appointments, too), and always, always, always asks you how you feel after each appointment.

^^^"Do...Do you feel like that [therapist/psychiatrist/psychologist] hears you? Because, you know, it's okay if you don't; we can always find a new person for you!"

After hearing and listening to you, Miles starts to think that he, too, may have PTSD. And, I mean, he probably does. Did y'all see how that boy became Spiderman? I don't think an adult could handle all that and my good sir was how old at the time? Fourteen? Fifteen?

Miles would be hesitant to talk about it at first (whether or not you know that he's Spiderman) because he doesn't want to feel like he's "piggybacking" off of you and also is he really traumatized or just overreacting?

He'd eventually tell you, though. If you know that he's Spiderman, he tells you the story of how it happened and if you don't know then he focuses more on the part about losing Uncle Aaron and how things have seemingly been constantly changing and stressful since then.

With your help, he would formulate a plan to talk to Rio and Jeff (or should I say Mr. and Mrs. Morales? Rio, please don't hit me) about starting therapy.

When he finally does tell them, Miles is scared out of his mind. Like, he's having an about-to-faint anxiety attack during the whole conversation. And what makes it even worse is that instead of giving an immediate response, his parents tell him that they're going to "talk it over" with each other.

^^During the first second that she and her husband are alone, Rio is advocating for Miles to go to therapy. Jeff agrees and has no problem with it, but Rio closes the door and says something like, "Start researching counselors," like they just didn't tell Miles that they were going to talk it over.

Rio knows her son and she's noticed the shift in his behavior ever since he's started attending Brooklyn Visions. She doesn't know if it's the school itself or something else going on behind the scenes and sometimes it drives her crazy at night. It hurts a little that her little man doesn't want to tell her but make no mistake, that's still her baby and she'll do anything for him and his happiness. So, if he wants to try therapy, then best believe, she'll be all around the hospital, asking for recommendations.

Miles is a nervous wreck before his first therapy session. He's hyperventilating, scared, rethinking everything. But once you (and his parents) come in to calm him down and remind him that this isn't weakness; it's a bold and brave decision that he made, he starts to calm down.

Y'all share coping mechanisms that you learn in therapy. Y'all make a commitment to learn more about each other's triggers and how you can best help each other through your rough times. Y'all regularly remind each other that you are not broken, not damaged, and worthy of all the love in the world.

You two most definitely have a secret spot that y'all go to when one or both of y'all are not feeling it.

Overall, Miles loves you and through your love, he has learned about himself and is happier and healthier than ever.

Bonus: Imagine Miles as Spiderman, screaming from a rooftop, "Mental Health Is Important!"

I had fun with this one.

To anyone struggling right now: Keep going, you're doing amazing. You are so loved and I'm proud of you for deciding to embark on this journey. It may not feel like you're making progress or like you don't know what you're doing but you'd be surprised how much of healing is throwing stuff at the wall and seeing what sticks.

And to anyone currently going through it: It will be okay. I'm so darn proud of you for persevering and remember, when you sink to the bottom, the only way left to go is upwards. You're so loved.

If you need someone to talk to or just want to chat, you can always send a message!

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the-ellia-west · 6 months

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Merry Christmas Everyone - Character Trauma

Sorry, Y'all. I'm a day late.

I wish I could have posted yesterday but this wasn't on my mind at all lol. I was very sick yesterday, but at least I'm alive!

Here's my Christmas gift to y'all!

Harsh characters vs Kinder Characters - These are general vibes --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kind/Cute Characters -

Constantly Apologizing

Trying to help people 24/7

Always worried about Disappointing people

Constantly avoiding answering questions

Lying about being okay

Blaming themselves

Always Guilty

Jumpy

Always inches away from crying

Always doing favors for others

Doesn't take care of themselves

If they do, it's only to keep other people from getting worried

Running away from problems

Constantly overreacting to minor inconveniences

Harsh/Reserved characters -

Violent outbursts

TRUST ISSUES

No emotions

What am I?

Breakdowns

Silence makes them irritable

Too much noise also makes them irritable

Hyper-activated Emotions

Emotionally or Physically abusing self on a bad day because it already sucked

Violent intrusive thoughts or words become normal

Pessimism

Constantly overly alert

NO RELAXATION

Trouble relating to anyone in any sort of way

Extra: Dreams

PTSD dreams are usually never anywhere close to the actual events

Flashbacks usually happen when awake

Often dreams are based on the type of trauma

Soldiers are more likely to see blood in dreams

Sexual abuse survivors are more likely to have people attacking or violating them in dreams

Physical abuse survivors are more likely to have loud sounds and other events related to their abuse in their dreams

Of course none of these are specific to each type, and you SHOULD mix and match, but these are generally more likely

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Different people have different trauma reactions, and so should characters. This sounds pretty obvious, but it's rather hard to do in my experience. It also goes to show that different types of trauma or traumatic events will make a different type of character

For example, I have a few of my characters and their trauma responses because Idk how else to explain it.

Character 1 - Marril - Experienced Physical and Emotional abuse, as well as witnessing several deaths and killing several people.

As a Child he used to be very exposed and unable to hide with short hair and a home that was generally very safe and quiet until it wasn't.

He has a tendency to break or destroy things out of resentment or just as a way to make himself feel better. He also generally obsesses over keeping things clean, because it usually meant better treatment at home. He also generally stays away from children because they remind him of the first person he killed. He also sometimes hallucinates blood on his hands, and isolates himself for fear of hurting them. He hides his emotions until he can't anymore and generally has very extreme negative emotions.

He is often mistaken to be much older than he actually is, and is generally very quiet. He also grows out his hair to distance himself from his past and to give himself an easy hiding place when he needs it. He hates people grabbing him, moving quickly, or touching his hair, and sometimes he will hurt or yell at people when even slightly provoked. Silence often triggers overthinking which brings guilt and bad memories, while sudden loud noises cause screaming, fight or flight, or even flashbacks.

Characters 2 & 3 - The Twins, Xhaazi and Kasi - Experienced emotional and Sexual abuse

The two of them have varied Emotional responses. Kasi tends to hide her emotions and act overly aggressive or overly friendly. She tends to be very tense and in many occasions, fight first ask questions later. She cannot tolerate being alone oftentimes and is sometimes clingy. She hates being restrained in any way and is prone to panic attacks and separation anxiety

She's generally a little reserved but becomes a little clingy when she finds people she likes. She is also over-apologetic and tends to cry around people she trusts for no reason. She always has nightmares and tends to enjoy loud noises because they distract her from her overthinking and anxiety.

While on the other hand, her Brother Xhaazi

He was the one who got it worse. He often injures himself when he's alone, hides his emotions extremely well, and tends to enjoy being alone or in silence. His tactics also amount to fight first ask questions later, but he is always in fight or flight mode and never trusts anyone unless given a good reason.

He tends to get very clingy to those he trusts and hates loud noises. He also tends to have a lot more nightmares than his sister and tends to cover up every single emotion he's feeling unless he thinks people will like it. He has depression and a lack of self-preservation along with extreme separation anxiety for his family and no one else when he can't easily get back to them.

So uh... Yeah? Have fun torturing your babies! Just make sure to differ their trauma from one another even if they experienced roughly the same things.

#creative writing #fiction writing #writing community #writer things #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #writeblr #writing #writing trauma #writing tips #writing stuff #writer stuff #on writing #merry christmas #sorry

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buckysmischief · 1 year

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shadow of mine [2/2]

druig x f!reader

wc: 3.4k

summary: druig was getting bored of babylon, he was ready to take on more adventures. but the shadows in his mind led him down a path, one he never dared to speak out loud (except for maybe to kingo)

an: another thank you to @stuckonjbbarnes, i wouldn't know what to do without you 🩵

masterlist | part one

1523 AD

It had been almost 200 years since Druig had seen you. Not even a glimpse. He had started to wonder if something had happened to you, if he had somehow fucked up with you too.

Not that he considered what happened at Tenochtitlan a fuck up, but after being alone for two years he started to feel some of the ramifications of his actions.

Alone wasn’t the right word, Druig had been surrounded by the hundreds of people he saved from themselves. Isolated, that’s what he was. He wasn’t quite sure how to handle the situation he created. He stepped in more than he ever had with the humans, but he felt it was best to live in the shadows for a while.

Two years without the Eternals was one thing, the break was truly needed. But two years without you? It certainly wasn’t ideal, not anymore. There were so many things he wanted to know, getting to know more about you was what he was looking forward to the most. Druig had done his best not to create his own narrative about you, which was extremely difficult when he’s only had two conversations with you in the last 2,000 years.

Instead, though, he started to wonder what all he didn’t know. What was being kept from him. Not confronting Ajak took more self control than he knew he had, unfortunately he couldn’t control his irritability. Once all the Deviants were gone he didn��t have it in him to care about anyone else’s grand plan, and he was done listening to someone who wasn’t being honest with him or anyone else.

“Are you going to be in everyone’s head this whole time or should I come back another time?” You stood behind him, a flower crown in hand.

Druig was so out of it he never even noticed you were there.

He turned around and smiled for the first time in what felt like centuries. “Is that for me?”

“I don’t just go around making these for everyone.” Just like the last one, it fit him perfectly. “Did you miss me?”

He grabbed your hands and brought them to his face, needing a way to know you were real. “It felt like I lost my shadow.”

You smirked at him, “A bit dramatic, don’t you think?”

“No.” That’s exactly what it felt like. You were always there, following him everywhere he went. A part of him, but not really. Always slipping through his fingers.. “Dramatic would be blowing in like the wind and disappearing just as easily.”

He let go of you but kept you close, debating to himself if he should enjoy the moment or jump straight to the questions he’s kept to himself all these years.

“So I was thinking, I know you must have about a million questions,” could you read his mind too?, “what’s stopping you from picking my brain yourself?”

He had thought about that a lot after you left the last time and he always came to the same conclusion, “I don’t know you as well as I wish I did, but you’re special to me. I’m not sure I could ever use my powers on you.”

You flashed him a devilish grin, “What if I asked nicely?”

He rolled his eyes, accepting then and there that you were going to be a handful. “Alright, next question. I’m assuming you’re also an Eternal?”

“Yes.”

“What’s your special power? Show me.” He hoped to start out with something fun, not too serious. There was plenty of time to get into that.

You gave him a quick smile before disappearing and reappearing behind him. He turned to face you and you were gone again, sinking into the darkness, making a game out of it.

Druig watched you emerge from several different places before finally realizing how you were doing so. “So I was spot on when calling you a shadow? And you called me dramatic.”

You rolled your eyes as you walked back to him. “Yes, well, I couldn’t just admit you were right so easily could I? That wouldn’t have been fun.”

If he had to narrow down the second he knew he was a goner, it would have been right then. He had no business falling for someone who easily could have been a figment of his imagination. What if it was really Mahd Wy’ry? No, Druig refused to even entertain that idea. He could smell you, touch you, taste you. Theoretically that is. There was no way you weren’t real.

He pulled you closer to him again, intertwining his fingers with yours, and began to walk to the river. “Not to ruin the mood, but did you find anything out? About why we were separated?”

The look of frustration on your face gave him his answer before you even started to speak. Is that why you were back so soon? Because you hadn’t found anything? Was it just another thing Arishem decided because he could? “I can’t find out without drawing too much attention to myself. But in my search I found another Eternal who has his own agenda but is willing to help me find answers.”

“His?” Druig’s jaw tensed. He’d never been the jealous type, but the thought of someone spending all their time with you while held on to the mere moments he got was unsettling at best.

You couldn’t help but chuckle, “You’re welcome to join us, take on a new adventure.”

“Now’s not the right time.” The thought of leaving with you had crossed his mind a time or two since he last saw you, but he couldn’t just abandon his people now. It didn’t feel right, not yet. “But one day I’d love to travel the galaxy with you. Get lost in the cosmos together.”

Druig thought about that often too, anything that involved spending more time with you. Truth be told he was jealous that he couldn’t remember what his lives were like with you, just another thing Arishem took from him.

By the time the two of you had made it to the river the sun began to set and Druig only had one more question to ask before he moved onto the more personal ones. “How did you find me? It couldn’t have been easy.”

You sat down on a log and pulled Druig down to do the same, to relax and enjoy the sunset. “I have a million memories of us watching the sunset together, none of them are as beautiful as this one.” It wasn’t until the sun had disappeared below the horizon that you answered his question, no matter how cliche the answer was.

“I felt you. Once I left the planet I was assigned to I followed that feeling until I landed here. It took me some time to track you down in Babylon, but not much. I wish I would have told you everything then, it’s not like I have many more answers now than I had before.”

Druig didn’t quite know how to respond to that. On one hand he was upset the way you handled it. The way you came and went for centuries without saying anything, he thought he made everything up at one point. He might not have had answers but at least he’d have you.

On the other hand, he knew you were only doing what you thought was best. It’s not like being separated from someone you were designed for, someone you didn’t know even existed until one random day was a situation that was easily prepared for.

At the end of the day, Druig was just thankful you found him at all. He never let himself wonder what it would be like if you didn’t.

“We have each other now, or at least until you have to leave. Which is..?” As much as he hated it, he knew it was coming.

You pouted and looked down at your feet, not having the heart to look him in the eyes. “I have until morning. We have a lead on where another group of Eternals is, apparently they haven’t heard anything from Arishem in over 5,000 years. Hopefully one of them knows something.”

Instead of dwelling on the few hours he had left with you, Druig brought you back to camp. He wanted to create as many memories he could with you since neither had any idea when you’d be back.

He introduced you to the few people that were still awake, they had a fire going and invited you to hear about how Druig saved them from themselves. While you listened, he went to grab dinner for the two of you.

What he saw when he returned had caught him off guard. Not really what he saw, but more of how it made him feel. The way the fire hit your features just right, the way your laugh filled the air, how easily you seemed to fit in.. it filled Druig with a happiness he never knew before until then.

“You’re absolutely breathtaking, you know that?” He asked after you excused yourself from the group, not giving you time to answer. “Come with me.”

The two of you spent the rest of the night telling each other all there was to know about each other. About how when you started getting your memories back your team was convinced it was Mahd Wy’ry and instead of wiping your memories, they took pity on you and let you leave the planet.

You told him about how you began to resent your powers at one point. Hiding in the shadows was all fun and games until you learned about the dark things the people on your planet did to each other and you could do nothing about it. In return, Druig told you that was also a struggle of his and played a big part in him leaving.

What he didn’t tell you was that it was your last visit that made him really start to doubt Arishem and gave him the strength to start doing what he thought was best for the people of this planet. Or at least a small portion of them.

By the time the sun started to rise Druig was really starting to talk himself into leaving with you, but he didn’t. He had to have some self control when it came to you or else he might accidentally lose himself.

“Hopefully the next time we see each other I’ll have more answers.” You stood in front of him and tried not to cry. So badly you wanted to stay but your search for answers, the time you lost, it had to mean something.

He titled your head to look you in the eyes, both of you lingering on each other's lips a little too long in the process. “As long as you come back to me.”

You started to disappear into the shadows, but Druig wasn’t ready. He had to do one more thing before you left.

“Yn! Wait!” He called out, hoping you’d reappear.

“I’m still here.” You whispered behind him. Desperately trying to keep your tears from rolling down your face.

Druig didn’t say a word, he didn’t have to. He turned around and opened his arms and you quickly jumped into them. Time felt like it slowed down. His hand gently rubbed the small of your back while you wrapped your arms around his neck, neither of you wanting to let go.

You pulled away enough to look at him in the eyes again, getting one last look before you had to go.

“Kiss me.” It was all he needed to say for you to close the gap between you two again, pressing your lips to his.

After what felt like centuries and no time at all, Druig no longer felt you in his arms. You were still in the forest, though, he still felt you there. He stayed in that spot until he knew you were gone, regretting not leaving with you when he had the chance.

2023

“It’s been weeks,” Makkari signed, “we haven’t heard from any of them. It’s like… they’ve disappeared.”

It had been almost just as long since the emergence, since Ikaris tried to kill him. It was selfish of him, he knew it was, but all he could think about was you and where you were. How long it would take to find each other again. His friends, his family, were missing and all he could think about was you.

“Arishem.” Thena said out loud what he had been thinking the whole time. “We have to go back.”

Just as Druig was about to agree with her, again for the most selfish of reasons, he began to feel a familiar pull. It was different from all the other times, it felt wrong. Whatever it was, Thena felt it too. She conjured her weapons and waited. He wanted to suggest she back down but it was Thena, that would never happen.

“I felt it too.” Makarri signed. Druig was less confident it was you then, none of the others have felt you before.

“What?” He didn’t have to act confused, he genuinely was.

Thena and Makkari walked closer to the flickers of light that appeared at the end of the corridor. Druig couldn’t move from where he was sitting, he couldn’t think. He felt the pull become stronger, his senses were blown.

Just then, a small troll was spat out from the light. Druig tried to focus as he mumbled something about drunk teleporting.

“Um..” Thena began, but was rudely interrupted.

“Hang on, hang on.” The troll cleared his throat and began to introduce whoever was stepping through next, “Behond, the royal Prince of Titan…”

“Enough Pip!” Another voice shouted, pushing the man and troll out of the way. “Eros’ ego is big enough and I promise you none of them care.”

Druig jumped from his seat, earning quick and confused looks from both Makkari and Thena.

“Hey, you.” You smirked at him, not knowing what else to say. Not in front of the others.

“You know these people, Druig?” Thena asked, weapons still in her hands.

He never took his eyes off of you, “I don’t know who the fuck the lads are, but this is Yn.” It came out a little more harsh than he meant it, or maybe he did. With everything else that was going on that was the icing on his world ending cake.

Thena and Makarri looked even more confused than they were before. They knew better than to push Druig for answers when he looked as serious as he did.

Eros and Pip stood behind you, they knew exactly who everyone was and what events had unfolded in the weeks prior. It turned out yours and Eros’ interests were more aligned than they had thought.

“So this is who you’ve been traveling with?” Druig thought to you, “A pretty boy and a drunken troll?” He tried his best not to come off jealous but he was doing a terrible job.

“You say that like there’s not two beautiful women behind you that you’ve been traveling with.”

He didn’t have to read your mind to know nothing had ever happened, but to finally see the man who had been helping you… using his powers to tell them to jump out of the Domo felt like the right thing to do.

“So you must be the famous Druig!” Eros went to shake his hand but was ignored. “Yn never shuts up about you.”

He hated to admit it, even to himself, that that statement had put him more at ease. “Talk about me a lot do you?”

“More than you have obviously.”

“Kingo knows. He even made a movie about it.”

That’s when Makkari got in the middle of you two, “Enough with the telepathy! Who are these people? How do you know her?”

Druig explained everything to them. Well, everything he knew. Makkari felt so sorry for you both, though she finally understood why he was the first to lose faith in Arishem.

Thena finally disarmed herself, if Druig said they weren’t threats then she trusted him. She looked to you a moment before asking, “So did you find anything out or were you just checking to see if Druig was alive?”

He watched you carefully, looking for any sign that you had found some answers. If you had then that would mean all of the time away from each other would have been worth it.

“Both actually.” You smiled, almost forgetting why you were even there. “We were on our way to Earth when Eros saw strange activities going on, not long after that I didn’t feel you anymore. I thought the worst. Looking more into it we realized the emergence had started-”

“You knew about the emergence and never said anything?” Druig interrupted.

“Your takeaways are the worst, you know that? I thought you died.” You shot back angrily. “Like I was trying to say.. I found out about it through my research and my memories. It’s why I believe Arishem separated us, we always found out just before they happened and tried stopping them. We came close to succeeding the last time, obviously Arishem didn’t like it then and definitely doesn’t appreciate it now if taking your friends is any indication. Congratulations by the way, I wish I could have been there.”

“You would be proud to know he almost put Tiamut to sleep,” signed Makkari, “until Ikaris tried to kill him.”

Druig winced at the memory, relieved that you weren’t there to see that. He could tell that you were proud of him but also slightly put off about the almost dying part. He stepped closer to you and pulled at your wrist, “I’m sure you two can handle these lads, there’s a few things Yn and I need to discuss in private.”

He pulled you out of the corridor and down a hallway, finally choosing a room that was far enough away from the others.

The last time he saw you was in 1523, you didn’t check in a single time. He wanted to look in your mind for himself to see what all you’ve been up to more than he ever had before, find any reason he could to validate how upset he was.

Druig wasn’t even sure he knew why he was upset. A mix between not seeing you for so long, his regret of not going with you, everything that had to do with the emergence, Eros’ existence. He just really didn’t like that guy.

“I’m so glad you’re alive.” All of those feelings were gone the moment your arms wrapped around him. “I’m sorry it took so long, we ran into a bit of trouble..”

“No, no. Don’t apologize,” he pressed his forehead to yours, “just tell me this is done. Promise me you’ll stay with me this time, no more leaving.”

You pulled back from him, giving yourself a clear view of his face. “You’re stuck with me for all eternity I’m afraid.”

He knew they were on a mission and his friends were quite possibly in more danger than they’ve ever been in before, but all he could think about was leaving it all behind. To find some corner of the universe where you and him could just exist together without another soul around. He deserved a chance to create his own memories with you, you deserved a chance to have your own set of memories from this lifetime. Arishem had taken enough, Druig didn’t want him taking any more.

No matter how badly he wanted to follow through with that plan, running away together, he couldn’t do that to his family. “After we find the others, I think we should find somewhere to call home. A place that doesn’t need protection, that isn’t incubating a Celestial. Just me and you.”

He didn’t know just how ready you were for that reality, how ready you were for it to be just you and him.

You parroted his words back to him, leading him back the way you came. “Just me and you.”

#druig x reader #druig x f!reader #druig x y/n #soulmate au #fluff #angst #marvel #eternals

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purpleleafsyt · 2 months

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Apologies for not maintagging these other posts but for this AU post to make sense you need to read this post and ESPECIALLY this one so go do that.. be aware of the warnings though

So hey hi hello I'm making my own Hanahaki AU since I was the one who sparked up the conversation initially by reminding people that platonic hanahaki can exist :D

In the second post I went over motivations behind Soul, Whole, and an overview of how the headspace works for my HMS.

I mentioned Heart and Mind too, so, I want to go over more with them in this post because they're ALSO interesting

Warnings for everything under the cut: Self harm/destruction/sabotage, Unreliable narration in the form of poor mental ideologies, isolation, suicidal ideation, and gore/body horror. Hanahaki in this AU is a physical representation of issues found in poor mental health so anything that can spawn from that can here!

Unlike Soul, who started having typical symptoms early in the loop, before it developed into something more, Mind jumped almost immediately into the blossoming stage. It couldn't tear through metal, but vines, stems, and flowers certainly found it's way through the exposed parts of her joints. She knew early on that something, fundamentally, was wrong with her

It hurt, more than anything she can remember, to feel it wrap into and tear through her wires. She cursed herself for relishing in the pain, however. It makes her closer to being human, and thus real, if she is feeling pain, does it not?

The divide of being alive and nonliving is something she struggles with a lot, because she finds herself able to logically thing through both. She is a fracture to a whole, who is alive, and yet she is a robot, inorganic, an automaton freak

But that's besides the point. The flowers are confusing, inconvenient, and is halting any progress. How they're even able to grow within her mechanics is beyond her. The flowers make her weaker too, and is sometimes she cannot let her thirds be aware of, lest they take advantage of that said weakness(Because after all, why would any of them inform the others of their condition?)

She, despite everything, wants to understand them. She removes them, because she has to, and repairs herself. She's alone, so while difficult, it's safe. She experiments with the carefully removed flowers, and finds they can continue to grow apart from her so long as she continues to cultivate them. It's a distraction sure, but there has to be an answer somewhere in there. Besides, her garden is her own, hidden, safe, and the flowers are oh so beautiful thanks to her efforts

On the flip side, it took Heart longer to figure it out(Mind found out first, and Heart last. It left Soul, the root cause, in the middle, as usual)

He formed in the new loop, and got progressively sick. It caused agitation, as he kept getting worse, but he pushed through. Eventually, he threw up petals, and was rightfully horrified.

By this point, Mind and Soul had effectively isolated him(themselves, truly, but the real reason didn't matter) so the thoughts were free to creep in, he wasn't needed by them, nor wanted. It doesn't take long, due to the circumstances, for him to enter the blossoming stage.

The removal of the flowers is a violent act, as it always is with him, because like hell is he going to let his thirds see it. They're already treated like a burden to their thirds, why would he let them know it's worse? It's agony, but he does it anyways, all the while hiding himself further

He notices, despite the torn and ripped petals, that the flowers never wilt if he stays by them. They simply do not die in his presence, in his care. From what he can tell, they're vibrant and beautiful too.

He's allured by the flowers. He's not sure of his worth, or his life, but it becons him to take care of it, so he does. Because after all, he needs purpose, and if his thirds clearly do not need him anymore, then he can yield. He devotes himself to his garden, staying alive for the flowers to remain vibrant and beautiful.

The thirds still have to see each other because, after all, if one suddenly dissappears for too long it can cause suspicion to rise, but all of them remain unaware of each other's plights.

(That is, until very specific events happen, which I may go deeper into with another post. This one is dedicated to rounding out motive)

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padfootastic · 7 months

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Lily’s dorm mates eventually were just passively arguing that her friendship with Snape was genuinely dangerous for her, because by that point not one of them held out hope that she’d listen and had more or less resigned themselves to her dying before graduation because people are dropping like flies by that time and the Muggleborn with a baby Death Eater best friend has a life expectancy of like a month (really, people are more shocked she survived ending the friendship and graduating than anything else that occurred at the school). They remain polite because otherwise the dorm situation will totally suck for several years, but they’re all privately wondering why the hell she is like this; they get that this friendship was all Lily had for a while, but they genuinely cannot understand why she’s clinging so hard to someone who is expressing beliefs that are getting people like her killed every week. But anyways, it’s pretty icy up in the dorms for several years, there’s the other roommates with Lily very much on the outside.

and the thing is--she doesn't even realise it for a long time!!! lily doesn't realise the level of animosity that's being cultivated between herself and the others, because she spends her time w snape or in the library or sitting somewhere. i do also think she had some friends here and there, in other houses etc, so she wasn't alone. or entirely isolated. but it wasnt enough for her to realise how dire the situation w her roommates was.

she also kept making it worse by insulting james, who was, in my mind, a castle favorite. he was a golden boy--always helped people, took care of the younger ones, protected the weaker students etc etc the kind of person who helps old people w their groceries ykno? lily always saw the worst side of him and never acknowledged the good and that antagonism didnt help her reputation at all.

(and this isnt even me going into the potential politics of a muggleborn snubbing a pureblood and how that would reflect on her in such a stratified society, both amongst the traditionalists and the more liberal ones bc like. thats a thing that happens. marginalised people 'acting above their station' is very much a perception weaponised against them but im not going there)

but when people see her mouthing off against james, calling him names and all, well--they're even less inclined to like her. she doesnt really mind it, until she does. after the mudblood incident when she's w/o her closest friend for the first time and cannot be insulated anymore. she has to deal w whats happening.

and i think that's when she really realises the true state of affairs.

#james potter #lily evans #i know there's also potential gender dynamics here #but i hate gender #and i hc the WW didnt have it (contrary to canon i think)#so i dont like thinking or talking about it #also fair warning. disclaimer? most of this IS hcs #i dont even believe it most of the time #just one potentail scenario bc its fun to mess w lily lol #pen’s asks

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whinlatter · 9 months

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3, 4, 14, and 37 for dean and seamus

my darling boys! 🥹 dean and seamus, off we gooooo. thank you @valfromcall!

3. Obscure headcanon

obscure headcanon 1 - dean thomas was born may 10th 1980, the day west ham won the FA cup. that west ham have never won the cup since remains a source of great regret for east london's golden boy. unfortunately may 10th also happened to be the day in 1997 when gryffindor won the house cup and harry potter scooped his ex from right from under his nose - a bad birthday for the ages. seamus tried to cheer him up by reminding him that may 10th is also the birthday of a proud son of ireland (bono from U2), which dean said was 'not helping'

obscure headcanon 2 - this is dean and seamus' son:

also this isn't obscure but their first kiss was 100% in the finnigan tent at the quidditch world cup after ireland's stonking victory over bulgaria

4. Favorite line

for seamus, it's probably when they're all in the dormitory in GoF and dobby rocks up and seamus nonchalantly goes 'someone attacking you, Harry?' aka mr finnigan giving precisely zero shits about whatever main character moment harry is having and thereby failing his audition for inclusion in the golden trio. bonus special mention to the world's worst pep talk in PS/SS:

“Harry, you need your strength,” said Seamus Finnigan. “Seekers are always the ones who get clobbered by the other team.” “Thanks, Seamus,” said Harry, watching Seamus pile ketchup on his sausages.

can't a man enjoy a condiment anymore smh

for dean, it's either "send him off, ref! red card!' from PS/SS or this from OotP:

"Well, [Moody] turned out to be a maniac, didn’t he?" said Dean Thomas hotly. "Mind you, we still learned loads."

14. Most heroic moment

seamus 'harry's a liar' finnigan getting beaten to a pulp and unrecognisably disfigured by the carrows. king shit

dean is being the biggest bravest boy in the world all on his own on the run leaving his mum and sisters behind and not being able to have a cuddle when he's lost and alone and scared and hungry all through DH :(

37. What they really think about themselves

i think, as teenagers, seamus was the one with a lot of insecurities and self-loathing: struggling with the knowledge that he was gay and a bit in love with his best mate and not really knowing what to do with it, in conflict with his mum and wrestling with who he was going to be in this big war that seemed to be looming, not the cleverest or the sportiest or the anything-est and generally a bit aggy and restless. dean was the much more relaxed one of the two. he had a strong sense of right and wrong, was sure the goodies would prevail before anything got too out of hand, was content with his kind of chill blokey vibe and got a fit girlfriend that meant he could park any of the slightly confusing feelings he was feeling for shay.

after the war, though, they swap roles. seamus has quite a settled sense of self after his school years - like, he got his fuck up out of the way (not believing voldemort was back, having his big sulk), but then redeemed himself, was on some real hero shit and really became close with the other DA lot, getting a lot out of the prestige of being an auror for a bit, no longer felt like he had much to prove, and felt loved and confident enough to come out. dean, however, really struggled with the impact of the war, feeling an intense sense of isolation and distance from the other's wartime experiences, and both envying seamus' confidence to come out but struggling to accept that he might also not be straight, like it was just another thing that would mark him out as Other. i basically think seamus and dean were hooking up a lot immediately after school and in their early twenties, but always in secret, while dean kept dating muggle girls and playing out this big tension he feels in his own identity, between the muggle and wizarding worlds, as well as over his own sexuality and internalised homophobia. i reckon seamus was the one to (eventually) recognise this was self-destructive and breaking his heart, and ended it. cue the wilderness years!

they obviously get back together eventually, though, hence west ham son (yes i'm obsessed with this child), although seamus threatened to break up with him when dean argued he should be allowed to put the imperius curse on declan rice to stop him moving to arsenal and betraying his beloved hammers in summer 2023

#these boys! break my heart everytime #i knew following UK football by osmosis would come in handy #deamus #dean thomas #seamus finnigan #headcanons #ask game

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cartoonrival · 11 months

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like sasuke is clearly deeply unhappy in boruto which is fine, i honestly think its GOOD that he's not just like suddenly content with his life and himself after the finale of shippuden, its just also sort of insane that the post canon where he is no longer the focus is one where he's so potently miserable. he's clearly still reluctant to really face konoha. he still feels like an outcast or a bad apple, he still thinks he needs to atone for what he did as a teenager, despite the fact that he's been actively atoning for like a decade. but it'll never be enough. the only person he is not afraid to face and does not think he has failed is naruto, but even then he is still eager to isolate himself again, and i KNOW that its isolating and not just "being by himself" (sasuke has never been an outwardly emotional person (except under major duress), and while i believe a lot of this is repression its also just how he is, so no amount of healing would make him as open as, say, naruto, but i digress) because these are not the words of a happy man. "if she hates me its fine, because at least the future will be bright". "this is also a journey of atonement." naruto WANTS him to stay, believes its been long enough, the people of konoha don't hate him anymore (not sure how true this is but it's what naruto believes/wants to be true), but sasuke says they should stick to what they're meant to do, which means naruto as the hokage, because he is well loved and good with people, and sasuke in the shadows, because he is meant to be alone and unrecognized.

tbc i don't think that sasuke could be happy "settling down," i don't think he DOESNT like being on the move all the time, but the scene with naruto where he leaves konoha without saying goodbye to anybody is clearly not a scene where sasuke is content with his life in the way naruto is. he isn't doing this because he wants to, its because he thinks that he has to suffer in order to be good, and that the people of konoha wouldn't accept him any other way. it IS TRUE that sasuke has always been a big believer in sacrifice for the greater good and wouldn't consider his own happiness to be important compared to the missions he needed to go on, regardless of how deserving of happiness he considered himself to be, but i absolutely refuse to believe that, if he DID believe he deserved it, there has been NO TIME EVER that he could come home and just be regular. just for a little. there is absolutely something that is pushing him out of konoha, unrelated to "i have a mission to go on." there's still a disconnect.

WHICH. unfortunately. brings me to. end of shippuden. he receives a letter from naruto praising him for protecting the village even without being there, he thinks, "maybe it's time to come home." sometime before he comes home, he catches wind that naruto is getting married. he sends a letter with nothing on it other than "congratulations," and he does not come home. for like 4 more years. next time he's home for an extended period of time it's when sakura has already giving birth to sarada and he's helping raise her until she's juuuust old enough to start retaining memories before he fucks off again.

he doesn't want to be around sarada and sakura. he doesn't want them to worry about him or concern themselves with him. he doesn't want to be affectionate with sakura, who clearly DOES want to be affectionate with him. he considers the fact that he and sakura had a kid together to be the thing that most connects them, which is only significant in this case because anyone with eyes can tell that they are not really connected in basically any other way. it's like the ring he gives her in that dino arc. clearly since you wear a ring now to show we're married it means that we're married even though i'm not doing any of the other things a husband should do, but this ring makes up for that. clearly since we have a kid our hearts are connected and we really do love each other, even though i'm not doing any of the other things someone who really loves you would do. you could argue that his refusal to make any contact with sarada and sakura IS out of love, that he's afraid of hurting them and thinks he's protecting them by staying out of their lives (this is most likely what kishimoto intends), but this claim doesn't have any actual PRECEDENT outside of the fact that i'm being told that sasuke apparently loves her, the evidence for that being well they got married and had a kid. off screen.

i think he feels guilty that sarada even exists, because it's his fault she has no dad and it's his fault she inherited the uchiha's massive capacity for grief and love, it's his fault that sakura is raising her alone, and he's running from this because hopefully he can make up for it by doing good for the whole world since he cannot bring himself to make up for it by being there for his wife and daughter. "she has sakura, she'll be fine" because sakura is more her parent than he will ever/could ever be. he doesnt HATE sakura or sarada, to be very clear. he cares about them both as people, he fully respects sakura's strength, is proud when he sees sarada fighting well, he wants her to be happy and wants her to like him, he wishes he could be a better father and husband to her and sakura. just without having to be their father and husband.

boruto is not good unfortunately but due to the fact that naruto IS good and sasuke's characterization is very lovingly done in the original series it's critical to me (because i am not normal) that i figure out how to connect pieces that kishimoto could not be assed to properly connect. he seems to RECOGNIZE that he's betraying sasuke's characterization by making him have a kid w sakura due to the fact that everything sasuke does after that is p much exactly what i would expect him to do if, through some freak incident, he ended up having a kid with sakura. Anywho

#txt157 #ENOUGH BRTO ANALYSIS!#nrto #copy pasted a reply to lorillee in the last paragraph sorry i felt that it was importnat to explain why i even bother #bc sske ISNT ooc. it is just this one specific moment that is very difficult to rectify and makes him into a huge asshole afterwards #i imagine he is ooc later in the series though bc he does come back to stay at least to some extent #but im not going to look into that i dont frankly care #meta157

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