#tw mention of voilence

[desultory-suggestions]

Your partner should never punish you for your mistakes. You deserve a loving conversation where you can work on your worries, not a test or abuse. 

#suggestion #suggestions #suggestion blog #tw abuse mention #abuse recovery #abuse #relationships #domestic abuse recovery #domestic voilence #reminder #communication #unhealthy relationships #healthy relationships #healing #boundaries #q matter

[schrijverr]

Shapest Tool in the Shed

A look into Eliot and how he views himself, his past and his intelligence.

On AO3.

Ships: none

Warnings: suicide ideation, self esteem issues, guilt, mentions of violence

~~~~~~~~~

Eliot never graduated high school. He has always looked old for his age and army recruiters with quotas to meet are more than glad to pretend they believe the kid in front of them claiming they’re eighteen.

So, Eliot disappears into the thrum of the army when he is sixteen – sixteen and a half, as Eliot will point out often to his mother back when he still calls home. Though, those calls end quickly, he has nothing to go back to anyway.

Quickly – quicker than someone his age has any right to do – he starts climbing ranks as the missions he gets send on get more and more dangerous. Eliot, however, doesn’t care. He’s proud of himself, of his skills. He might not have been the smartest in school, but he has found something he is good at and he relishes in it.

Joining the army at such a young age means that it is made difficult to develop a conscious. The violence is encouraged, ruthlessness rewarded and death is seen as natural. So, Eliot never really does.

He just moves into ops so special that he’s not even sure the president knows about them, doing things no human should be capable of doing without feeling remorse. There are truly two types of ways to go from there: wetwork or suicide.

Eliot rolls from specialized missions into wetwork with the ease of a seasoned professional at age 23. Seven years he served his country and now he serves his own bank account.

In his time in the army, he was often the youngest on the team and people always treated him like the baby, until they were out there in the field. Eliot had the experience to back himself up and while he might not have known what the hell Einstein or Newton are on about, he picked up enough skills to survive and those are way more valuable.

Those survival skills also include how to remain under the radar. How to function without being seen by the government when they have to be able to deny your existence. It’s knowing how to remain invisible, how to hide money, how to find water and food in the wilderness, what danger to avoid and how to blend in.

Eliot does not view himself as intelligent, but he is smart and he knows what he needs to get the job done. He picks up the skills he needs to survive. It’s either that or get killed, nothing special about it.

It takes him two years to build up a solid reputation in his line of work. Two years of staying out of sight of those that want him in prison and in sight of those that want to pay for his services. Two years before he ends up on Moreau’s radar.

Damien Moreau.

Somehow, it feels unavoidable that he ends up in front of the man. Anyone, who is someone in their business, has heard of Damien Moreau. Every hitter worth something has a job for this man on their resume. It’s been a build up. Something that had been coming for a long time.

So, Eliot finds himself in front of Damien Moreau. He’s still young, no longer naive, but with more confidence in himself than is probably good for him. It’s only much later that he’ll realize that taking his first job for Moreau is the stupidest thing he has ever done in his life.

However, Eliot does not realize that just yet, so he accepts the job from Moreau with a grin on his face, the amount of zero’s behind the number flashing in front of his eyes.

Eliot works together with Moreau for three years. In those three years he gets closer and closer to the man as the jobs he does get more and more brutal. He adapts to the work, growing to feel secure as he succeeds. Soon Eliot Spencer is the best in the business. No one to fear.

Being on top of the game, however, comes with an unforeseen setback. Eliot has never really been the best at something. He was good at a lot of things, physical things. But suddenly, he’ll look at the younger recruits and cringe at their mistakes, mentally mapping out how their behavior is going to get them killed one day.

For Moreau, these are the grunts that will do the less intricate work. He does not care if they live or die. Those who will serve him well, will live, those that will not, won’t.

Eliot then also realizes that he is their leader. He is the one in charge to organize their stings and these kids are the ones, who are supposed to have his back.

If there is one thing the army taught him, it’s that the people you’re attacking with can make or break a mission. Eliot might be skilled, very skilled, but there are certain things he can’t do alone and if these are the ones to have his back, then he’ll be screwed.

He’s going to have to take these kids under his wing and teach them at least basic skills, if they all want to make it to tomorrow.

Taking those kids under his wing backfires in the oddest way.

He starts to feel responsible for them, starts to care about their well being. Starts to care if they die. He has built these kids from the ground up, taught them what they needed to survive and when they don’t, it falls on him to carry that blame.

So, his road to redemption starts selfishly. It’s heartbreakingly in character for him and he’ll hate himself for the rest of time for it. But it is the step he needs.

The first time, one of his men dies on a mission and he feels guilt about not being able to return his body to his family, Eliot knows he is screwed. He hasn’t made the effort to bring a comrade’s body back home since he was 21 years old. He hasn’t cared about anyone dying since he was 22. Now at 28, he’s suddenly thrown back into caring; the emotion foreign to him.

Suddenly, Eliot starts to feel the need to get out. To get away from Damien Moreau and his entire operation. It’s not even that the man asks him to do worse, he has already done his worst and at the time he didn’t care a bit, didn’t flinch at the innocent blood on his hands. It is only in hindsight that he starts to feel sick at his actions.

Sparing the General had been self serving. Eliot might have regained guilt, but he still is a selfish man at heart and the General is his ticket away from Moreau.

So, he gets out.

He flees.

And then he hides. He hides and tries to deal with the fallout of getting slammed out of that disassociative uncaring state he has lived in for many years now and into a life of shame and guilt and fear. A life of revulsion at the person he has become.

Eliot has to find peace in what he has done, knowing he can never undo all the hurt he caused and never repent for all the lives he took. That he can’t go back to that kid from Oklahoma, who thought the army would save him from the horrors of high school.

He also has to come to terms that he never thought he would feel like this. That he had convinced himself he was above what he had seen break so many others in his line of work. Much like leaving the army, those in wetwork had two endings: remain uncaring till death or loose your mind and take your own life.

Right now, he is leaning hard against that second option, the first forcefully taken from him, all by that stupid kid. That kid, who had been so proud the first time he won a fight, who always managed to make a joke despite the danger they went into. Who looked with unseeing eyes and a bullet hole in his head.

But he also knows, that taking his own life, would be a coward’s way out. And Eliot prides himself on not being a coward. He is going to live through this, that he vows. He’s going to make it through and not let Moreau win, not let him take the rest of his life.

However, this is the moment where he realizes that taking that first job for Moreau, has been the stupidest thing that he has ever done.

Not just because of the destructive path the man lead him on, a path Eliot had already been walking before him. But also because Eliot has intertwined all of his being into Moreau’s business and now, he has not a cent to his name and will have to look over his shoulder for the rest of his life. Maybe if he had gotten that diploma, he wouldn’t be here now.

He has no skills next to death and if he wants to see his redemption through, he will need money, a job. Saying yes to the contract to kill again, weighs heavy on him, but he doesn’t see another way to be able to move on.

The compromise he makes himself, is no guns. If he is doing this, he is giving his opponents a fair chance and himself room to get defeated, to take the punishment.

Eliot will never be sure what Toby sees in him that night, when he is looming in his kitchen, knife in hand. Lurking and waiting for the lone cook to return for prep tomorrow. Doesn’t know why Toby would quirk a brow at him and merely say: “Your knife form is all off.”

But Toby does and Eliot is shocked to the core. His skill in weaponry is one he is proud of, the only one he has developed over the years and to hear it be critiqued piques his interests. That curiosity leads him to ask why Toby would say that and Toby merely informs him that he’ll be cutting no food if he holds the knife like that, before showing him how cooks use their knives.

It is the second time that Eliot does not complete his mission, that he does not leave his target behind dead and bleeding. Toby lives and this time, it is not out of a selfish reason. It is hardly anything, but it feels like a big step for Eliot anyway.

He stays and talks with Toby for the rest of the night, learns the other has been to prison and the hit on his head is from a former gang buddy of his. Learns that Toby now teaches other ex-cons how to cook, so they can make something off themselves. Learns that Toby has an empty spot for him if he wants to take it.

Eliot knows that he is no ex-con. What he is, is way worse and integrating back into society will always be out of reach for him. But he is closer to them than most other people. Ex-cons often don’t finish high school, get caught up in things bigger than them until they don’t know how else to live, they know violence and the fear of getting caught.

So, Eliot stays and Eliot learns.

Cooking, as it turns out, is something Eliot is good at. It’s something he enjoys and something he can use to push out all the emotions that threaten to overtake him. He can put the guilt of what he has done into pasta, wrap up the shame in the dumpling dough, mix the fear into the sauce he’s stirring and display the revulsion at himself on the steaming plates.

His 29th year on this planet is the first in twelve years wherein Eliot Spencer does not take a single life.

He has learned a non-violent skill and feels human again. Hell, he just feels again. He knows that he has more skills than the killing he gave himself credit for. He can fix cars, has picked up multiple languages and can plan like the best of them. However, Eliot will never feel smart again, fears giving himself that label, because it makes him blind.

Eliot is just a guy with plenty of skills. These skills are limited to the physical for the most part, not things that he can put on a resume, but they’re enough to market himself. Like he had already suspected, Eliot is not cut out for the civilian life. He has tried it, but he will always feel like he is putting those around him in danger.

He only stays with Toby those first two months, skipping town after the man who put a price on his head died in a shoot out with the cops. Then he travels around the world, picking up more ways to cook food and hiding from those that still have it out for him. His name carries enough weight that many don’t try, but he is intimately aware of the ax hanging above his head and the lack of funds that can carry him to safety.

So, he decides to go in a different direction. Retrieval is close enough to his old job that his skill set and reputation come in handy and pays well enough for him to rebuilt the safety net he used to have.

When changing career paths Eliot also decides that he will no longer kill and no longer use a gun. The two rules have kind of already existed in his own mind, but he makes them explicit to himself and people looking to hire him. He is turning over a new leaf.

Of course, Eliot knows that he cannot undo what he has done. He cannot make up for it and he cannot pay the universe back what he has taken from it. Eliot Spencer is a terrible man and he is aware of it. He is not looking to make up for what he has done, he just doesn’t want to make the bloodstain on his person bigger. He allows himself to be stupid enough to believe that that will be enough for him.

Retrieval can be kind of fun. It feels less intense than wetwork, while giving the same adrenaline kick and good enough pay. People will never pay the same for a statue than a man’s life, however, the amounts would be enough to send a normal person spinning.

In his new line of work, he also encounters one Nate Ford. By the time he gets into working with artifacts at 29, Nate already is an established name to watch out for and by the time Eliot turns 31, the man has chased after him on a few occasions.

And Eliot must admit Nate is good at what he does. However, Nate should also be lucky that Eliot isn’t doing his old job anymore, because he is terrible at securing a place and often times it would have been easier to eliminate him as a threat than try to work around him, but Eliot manages.

Well, he manages most of the time. Nate never catches him, but he does outsmart Eliot and gets the stuff Eliot stole back. It’s infuriating, but Eliot knows he is not the most intelligent out of the two of them. He’s not the most intelligent out of most people in the world. He didn’t even finish high school.

Then Nate Ford disappears from the scene, falls off the face of the earth for a few months. Then falls into a hole of alcohol. With a man like him, people talk and Eliot heart aches for the loss Nate endured. Eliot knows what inhumane looks like – he still calls back on that part of his life to dole out threats he won’t live up to – and what IYS did to Nate is inhumane.

However, Eliot can’t ruminate long in what happened to Nate, nor does he care very deeply. He isn’t the man’s friend, hardly knew him.

Plus, while retrieval isn’t the same as wetwork, it is still very dangerous and with Eliot’s past, he continuously has to be on high alert or it will all come crashing down on him again. And selfishly, Eliot wants to live. He is starting to like who he is becoming and starting to be at peace with who he used to be.

So, he doesn’t really think much of what happened to Nate Ford until two years later, when the man is in charge of a job.

Eliot can be honest with himself and admit it is a surprise to see Nate playing for their team. He has always been as honest as they come and Eliot knows that what they’re doing now is far from honest work, but with the turn his life had taken, Eliot can’t blame him for taking the payday and he hears how the man justifies it to himself.

Eliot can also be honest with himself and admit that Nate is good at what he does. He is obviously very clever and a good strategist. When it all goes south, the way he plays Dubenich right back can only be described as masterful.

And another thing Eliot can be honest to himself about, is that taking down Dubenich felt good. Really good.

It felt good in a different way than a good, clean kill used to feel, different than what winning an evenly matched fight feels like, different than what a good retrieval feels like. It felt like he is actually making a difference in the world. Taking down a scumbag like Dubenich prevents people getting hurt in his path, instead of Eliot hurting people. He’s protecting them.

The payout they get from the job also doesn’t hurt. The amount makes Eliot’s head spin and his head is hard to spin after all the payments he has been offered for his services throughout his lifetime.

That check, which Hardison hands to him, is his ticket to safety. There is still the chance people will come after him of course, that will never go away. However, he’ll have the funds to disappear if they do. And what this money really does, it ensure that he can say no to whatever job he wants. It is retirement money. Eliot will never have to fear again that he’ll have to resort to wetwork to keep himself alive.

With that safety, he craves to feel more of that good feeling. He has always resigned himself that he’ll never be able to make up for what he has done and, while he still believes he won’t, the work makes him feel like he can at least turn the ocean of blood into a pool.

And it seems Eliot isn’t the only one who felt good while on the job, because all of them return to Nate, ask him to lead and want them to be a team.

Eliot Spencer is pretty sure that coming back for the second job, is the only smart thing he has ever done in his life.

Working with the team is the best thing that happened to him. All of them are highly skilled in their areas and Eliot learns more than he is willing to admit from just watching them. From being allowed on their team.

If he allows himself to be honest, he can admit that he isn’t sure why they’d want him there. He has never been a good person and they’re aware of it, at least on some abstract level, so why they would even want to be near him is beyond him.

However, he can recognize special, so if he can take the hits so they don’t have to, then he’s more than happy to protect them. He has always been better at taking this hits then thinking.

He is more than happy to protect the team, to feel like he’s keeping this bit of goodness alive. To feel like he’s doing good by keeping them safe, instead of keeping safe the riches of someone who got them through carnage. Just the fact that he is protecting instead of hurting is more than enough, he can take the punishment, repay the hurt he doled by getting hurt for them.

And he is grateful that the team lets him, that they recognize him to make the calls he has to make and that they trust his judgment in the situations he knows best.

It’s not that he’s smarter than them, he tells himself. He knows he isn’t. Grunts like him just repeat the same steps over and over again, see what works for others and what doesn’t. It’s one big dance they all do.

But that doesn’t mean everyone knows the responses, Eliot does. Eliot knows risks, one of the only things he has had to get good at. One of the only skills he honed.

So, he knows it’ll be safer for him to take the beating from Tank, rather than risk the team in one of Nate’s convoluted last minute plans after they’ve already been made. And he knows how to respond to the kidnappers when Nate and Maggie are taken.

What throws him for a loop about it all, however, is that the other seem to respect him, seem to think he is knowledgeable.

Sure, Hardison continuously makes fun of his punchy hands and how he doesn’t understand tech and Parker gets an odd amount of joy of poking at the bruises he got by trying not to kill anyone as he fights, while Sophie calls the fighting barbaric and Nate uses him as human shield more often than not.

However, when Nate puts him in as a grifter, no one questions his choices and they all assume he can do it. When a new language pops up they turn to him to see if he speaks it and when it all turns south, Nate refers to him to get them out and everyone follows what he says.

A part of Eliot can’t help but think of those kids he was in charge of under Moreau. The ones that didn’t make it on the dark days. How much it hurt to loose them. How much worse it will be if anything ever happens to the people under his care now. How easily they trust him with their lives when he isn’t the brightest out there and one mistake can end up with them dead.

Eliot feels like he doesn’t deserve their trust, but revels in it anyway. Feeling human is something he hasn’t done until he was 28 and feeling positive about being alive is a novel experience that has only come once he met the team.

Slowly, he starts to feel like maybe he doesn’t have to get their trust, their faith in him. He just has to accept it and play his part in keeping them alive.

Naturally that means it come crashing down. He already doesn’t deserve the trust they put in him and now he’s lying them and putting them all in danger by allowing them to go after Moreau without speaking up. Without warning them of the dangers of that man. Without telling them all he knows about how Moreau runs his operation.

The guilt is eating at him and he makes another stupid decision. His whole life is already made up of stupid decisions, what’s one more? He’s only ever done one smart thing and that is stick with the team, he’s not putting them in danger when it is his past haunting them.

He decides to go after Moreau himself.

Of course he still has the team’s back while they go after his former boss, he is just also going behind it, so they won’t ever get to their final destination.

Eliot reasons that if he can kill Moreau, before they get close, then no one but him will ever have to know about his past. About how stupid he has been. How many people he’s hurt. No one but him and Moreau, who’ll have a bullet in his head.

Moreau loved having him as a secret weapon, few people know he worked for him and his leaving Moreau’s side has been kept under wraps to avoid Moreau seeming weak. As far as the dirty underbelly is concerned, Eliot is still out there, doing Moreau’s bidding.

It’s not a reputation Eliot is a fan of, but it helps. He knows how the silent shadow of Moreau has kept some people off his back these past five years. Let him be peaceful. Allowed him not to have to kill again.

He will have to kill again.

Yeah, he knows that is a pessimistic way to look at it, but there is no other way to defeat Moreau and he knows it. He has spend years in the man’s operation, he knows how hard it will be to come close to toppling it over. How smart Moreau is. Should he live, he will find a way to break out and rise to power again. It’ll only be a matter of time.

So, Eliot has resigned to breaking his no-kill streak to take down Moreau. Anything to protect those who have taken him in, who somehow see good in him.

Finding Moreau isn’t hard – Eliot has kept tabs on him ever since he left – it is finding an opening to take him out that is difficult. If he had Hardison at his back to track Moreau’s digital moves or Parker to look for unseen entrances or Sophie with her way of getting close unnoticed or Nate’s planning, he might be more successful, but he can’t involve the team in this. He’ll have to do it in his own stupid way.

Not that he isn’t cautious, of course. Eliot’s one skill next to violence is risk assessment, as stated before. He knows how to not rush in unprepared. How to not get killed. It’s the whole thing that got him in this mess in the first place.

Just like he knows it’s easier if you have good people at your back, but how those people will be at risk of dying if either of you don’t know how to assess the risks. If either of you do something you shouldn’t have. He can’t risk the people at his back again, when he has the most experience in what he is doing. When him dying matters less than them dying.

Eliot works alone, he knew that back then too and if he involves other people in that sort of job, they get dead.

Naturally, this plan of his also doesn’t work out for him. The pressure on the team gets bigger and before he can take a shot on his own, Nate is already hounding Moreau and will not be swayed differently. Eliot understands Nate not listening to him about it, he doesn’t have the mastermind’s brain and he never tipped his hand as to why he might know how dangerous this is.

A part of him knows that if he speaks up, they’ll think twice about it, but then they also might just kick him to the curb. He would get that. But then they would go after Moreau without him there to keep them safe and why he might be dumb, he isn’t stupid enough to let that happen.

So, Eliot stays quiet and Eliot plays along.

However, he makes sure to get assigned to get the auction details from Moreau and volunteers Hardison to with him. He is the smartest person Eliot knows and he needs some smarts at his back before he does something stupid again. Plus, Hardison trusts him the most. He hates himself for it, but Hardison is the one that won’t question him if he has to do something and who’ll play along if needed. Eliot wants him there.

At the elevators Eliot realizes that if he doesn’t take charge now, they’re never getting in and if they do, they’ll be blown in seconds when he is recognized. So he does something stupid and gives the guards his real name and hopes Hardison’s smarts will balance it out.

Standing next to that pool, Eliot realizes that thinking he would be able to face Moreau again is one of the dumbest things he has ever done.

Fear grips him as he is face to face with the man, who made sure Eliot would never find peace ever again. It takes all his energy not to let it show. To not let slip how terrifying is of Moreau in front of him and for Hardison in the pool behind him.

Eliot will say yes to anything if it means Hardison will be able to come up for air again. If the other dies due to Eliot’s own stupid decisions, he’ll never be able to live with himself.

So when all Moreau wants is to have some General dead, then Eliot will do that without any hesitation. He already knew going after Moreau meant ending his no-killing streak.

In the end, he doesn’t kill the General. It’s almost ironic that the two times he thwarted Moreau it involved not killing a General.

More surprising is the fact that the team doesn’t immediately send him away. Not even Nate, who has witnessed the carnage that can be Eliot Spencer. The person he used to be without a soul, without remorse or a conscious. That heartless killer.

They’re a little mad at him of course, but they seem to understand why he didn’t want to tell him, how much Moreau scares him.

And when they keep him away from Moreau during their second con they run on the man, it doesn’t feel like distrust. Instead it feels like they’re keeping him away from his personal devil, so he won’t have to go through that again. It feels like he’s being protected and no matter how much his mind screams at him that it should be the other away around, his heart can’t help but feel safe.

After they take down Moreau, Eliot throws himself into keeping these people safe even more than he did before. Putting his body on the line is the only way he knows how to make up to them for the man he used to be.

He scales a mountain, getting Parker back safely. He takes a carnival ride to the face, because Nate told him to do his worst. He takes on a cartel to get Hardison back. Subjects himself to torture because Nate asks, goes back to his roots and tortures the interrogator right back when Hardison is taken again. He even contemplates killing again, so Nate won’t ever have to come close to being who Eliot used to be.

He doesn’t, though. He doesn’t, but it’s close.

When he holds the gun to Dubenich’s face his hand is shaking. Killing in that warehouse took more out of him than he thought. Not killing has soothed his soul like nothing else has ever since the kids under his command died.

Eliot knows that he will give up that peace of mind if Nate asked it of him. If the man wanted someone dead, Eliot would pull the trigger.

But Nate hasn’t asked for this death.

Sure, he wants the man dead. Hell, he wants to kill him himself. A thing Eliot can’t let him do, because he knows what it will do to Nate and he doesn’t deserve that. And if Eliot does it now, he will save Nate that fate.

He should do it.

He should go back to that far away state where he didn’t really exist in this world and neither did his actions. He should pull the trigger and kill Dubenich. Protect Nate from becoming anything that is close to what Eliot is.

However, his hand is shaking and selfishly he disarms the gun instead of shooting it as he prays that Nate will be smart enough not to do what Eliot did.

As Eliot prayed, Nate does not kill someone. The two end up dead, but Nate is intelligent and he doesn’t need to get his hands dirty for the world to do as he wants. Doesn’t have to use brute force to bend it to his will. Doesn’t have to be stained like Eliot is. A part of him hates Nate a little for how easy it comes to him.

The team moves to Portland and Eliot follows without question. He would follow them anywhere, no questions asked.

The others probably know that, so Eliot is a little surprised at the Brewpub and state of the art kitchen Hardison has waiting for him. As if Eliot needs an insentive to stay, even as Nate and Sophie start to drift off and it becomes clearer and clearer that five are going to be three soon enough.

Eliot isn’t stupid enough not to see how Nate tests their abilities more and more. How they fill the gaps Nate and Sophie will leave. Can’t help but wonder why Nate think Eliot will ever be enough without them. Parker and Hardison are smart, but Eliot’s stupid might weigh them down. Wonders if Nate is assessing if he can handle it or if he’ll be a liability.

Fuck, Eliot doesn’t want to become a liability.

Nate and Sophie deserve a good retirement, so Eliot tries his hardest to prove that he’s good enough to be an asset. He takes all the hits that come his way, works on characters with Sophie and tries to think what Nate will do when a mark just won’t bend.

The most obvious move Nate makes is sending the three of them to DC for a small con, even Eliot can’t miss that one.

The con they’re there to run goes off without a hitch, but before they can skip town and avoid consequences for their crimes Eliot gets a Call. The capital is completely deserved there, because it’s the type of call he used to get before. Before the team, before his conscious, before the lives of others became valuable to him.

Eliot can’t ignore what is about to happen. Can’t ignore that someone is going to die today unless he does something about it. He is a good guy now. He protects others. It might be stupid, but he tells the others as much and they, maybe equally stupidly, trust him enough to come with to stop it.

A part of Eliot blames himself for not walking away when he had the chance, because what they uncover in the end is way bigger than any of them can handle. Eliot knows that, the second he sees who is on the hit list. And it becomes even more clear when Vance fills them in on what needs to be done.

Vance is a military man, who Eliot worked with between 21 and 23. Vance might have been older than him, but at the time Eliot had more experience than the other. Eliot went into wetwork, while Vance was smart enough to accept a suit position before his hands were so stained, he no longer felt the need to serve.

Eliot knows what Vance has done. Knows how smart the man is and how he uses it to get people together and dance to his tune. Knows that people die under Vance’s command, just like they’d done under Eliot’s.

Hardison and Parker cannot, under any circumstance, die. Eliot won’t let it happen.

However, Eliot also isn’t as bright as either of them and maybe he has grown soft with having people to fall back on. People who are so intelligent and who have the skill to get Eliot out of situations he can’t get himself out of. So, Eliot lets them stay.

With every new thing they uncover about what is happening in DC, Eliot regrets bringing the two with him, but sending them away is impossible. This needs to be stopped or they’ll be at risk anyway and Eliot knows this is beyond his own capabilities to stop. He punches problems, not solve those that are unpunchable.

But when Hardison panics, a small part of Eliot wants to validate that fear and get him to run and not look back. Get him to leave Eliot here while he can get out of harm’s way.

But at that point they know there is no getting out of harm’s way. They either stop it or are all in danger, no gray area to operate in.

So, Eliot is more open about his feelings than he has ever been before and tells Hardison how smart he is, how amazing his brain is and that he just needs Hardison to point him in the right direction so he can solve this problem in the way he knows well: with a good punch.

It is enough to calm Hardison. They both know this is how their team works. Hardison the brain, Eliot the punch and Parker with solutions to the problems they didn’t foresee.

He fears for her life, but god is he glad she is there with them. That she is smart enough to board the train, to bring that diamond to cut the glass, that she knows to keep Hardison safe, that she remembers how fire kills it.

Eliot doesn’t mind getting shot twice to keep them safe. He can take the punishment and he can protect the people who do the good, who are righting the world. He can aid in their struggle for justice, even if it will never cleanse him of his own sins.

The three of them work well together and he has no issue saying no to Vance when he asks. Nate will be leaving and these two will need someone to point in the right direction so he can punch the problems that are punchable.

It’s only when they get to their hotel that Eliot’s worldview comes crashing down yet again, much like it had back when he was 28. Now at 38, ten years later, it happens again and in a very different way.

After throwing away his crutch – which isn’t the smartest thing he has ever done, but not the dumbest either – Hardison and Parker have supported him all the way back to their room until he can collapse on one of the beds.

He is exhausted and glad to sit down. The other two are clearly still too wired from their day to even think of taking it easy, both still buzzing with excess energy, which they try to pour in fussing over Eliot.

On an abstract level Eliot appreciates their concern, but it’s quite unnecessary. He tells him as much and they ignore him after giving him a look.

Luckily, they ease up a little bit anyway and when they deem him cared for enough, they go back to poking and ribbing him. Parker is poking his shoulder, while Hardison sends him a smug look and says: “So, I’m the smartest man you know, E? I’m flattered.”

Eliot bats Parker’s hand away and plasters on his best grumpy expression. He can’t let Hardison know how high he has him in his mind, the other will become insufferable. No need to show any genuine emotions, he thinks as he grouches: “It’s all comparatively, Hardison. I never even graduated high school, not that hard to be smarter than me.”

Instead of gloating further, like Eliot expected, Hardison frowns, smug face gone, and asks: “What do you mean by that?”

Later Eliot will blame the blood loss, but in the moment, the question just catches him off guard and without meaning to, he replies: “We both know I ain’t smart, just ribbing you back a little.”

Hardison’s frown deepens and he says: “Eliot, you’re very smart, what are you on about, man?”

Next to him, Parker nods and repeats: “Very smart.”

Eliot meanwhile can only look at the two with, what must be, shock on his face. There was a time Eliot considered himself to be smart, but with hindsight he realizes he has made too many stupid decisions to ever be it. He has made peace with it. To hear from two of the smartest people he knows that they think he is smart is tilting his world.

Much to his horror, he can feel a flush overtaking his cheeks and he looks away as he tells them: “No need to lie to me. I’m a little hurt, not in distress. I can handle the truth, you know. I punch things, you guys just point me to who. I don’t mind. We all have our things.”

“Are you playing with me? Is this a joke?” Hardison asks, practically demands. “Eliot, you speak multiple language and are skilled in so many martial arts, not to mention all your culinary knowledge and frankly terrifying Rolodex of distinct features, sound etcetera. And your grifting manipulation skills.”

“Those all require smarts,” Parker adds. “And you are very tactical, good at coming up with exit strategies and plans of attack. That’s not easy either.”

Eliot blushes deeper under the praise, but waves it away in the end as he shrugs: “Those are just skills, both of you have basic criminal skills. I’m not a mastermind like you’re shaping up to be Parker or a literal genius. I’m just a guy who joined the army before getting out of high school.”

“You keep bringing up high school like that is a measurement of any form of intelligence instead of just if you can remember stuff,” Hardison says. “Not to mention that Parker never even went to high school and-”

“She’s street smart,” Eliot protests, because no one will insult Parker’s intelligence when he’s around, not even Hardison.

“I know,” Hardison rolls his eyes as Parker points out: “So are you.”

Before he can protest more, Hardison says something that shuts him up. “And – as I was saying – I also never graduated high school.”

“What?” Eliot can’t help but exclaim, never seeing that coming.

“Yeah, man,” Hardison shrugs like it’s nothing. “Me and school didn’t really jam and Nana could use extra money more than anything school could teach me. I dropped out to help, then never really looked back. Not like I needed a degree with my job.”

Eliot’s whole view is shattered like that. It isn’t like he didn’t know that high school wasn’t indicative of much, but a part of him assumed that those around him had more education than him, that his failure started there. But that internal bias has just been shaken up.

“What you do isn’t easy, E,” Hardison tells him intently as if to drive the point home, just in case Eliot missed it. “You’re one of the smartest people I know.”

“I’ve always thought you were very smart too,” Parker agrees. “You know things, makes me feel safe that you’re there to help me find a way out. You think like me. We’re us. I like us being us together.”

And Eliot really hopes the blood loss is substantial enough that he can blame the moist eyes and choked up voice on it as he says: “Thanks, I- uhm, I’ll try to see it like that.”

“We’ll be here to remind you,” Parker informs him happily as she crawls into bed next to him and snuggles into his good shoulder.

“Yeah, man, we won’t let you forget you’re our own smart ass,” Hardison smiles as he sits on Eliot’s other side, letting their legs press together while being cautious of his injuries.

“You’re the smart ass,” Eliot ribs, aware that Hardison probably let him have that easy comeback so they could leave the emotional talk behind them if he wanted too.

“And still you put up with me,” Hardison says, letting his smile turn back into that smug little grin from before.

“Sadly,” Eliot grouches, but he doesn’t mean it and they all know it.

So, yeah, Eliot never graduated high school. He has made some stupid decisions in his life and lived the consequences, but he has learned from them too and picked up all sorts of skills that make him a smart hitter, who made it to 38 already.

Eliot hasn’t disappeared into a shallow grave before he could reach proper adulthood like so many around him have. Instead he found a family who want him there and make sure he has them to come home to, alive and well.

Quickly – quicker than they had any right to – they made themselves comfortable in his heart and he can’t be mad, because the work they do feels good and they all work well together, both as five and as three. They have found something they’re good in and they relish in it.

Nate and Sophie leaving when they do means that the others have to refind a balance. But they have been taught and mentored, given room to learn how to swim, before getting thrown in the deep end of the pool. So, they’re prepared to say goodbye when the moment comes.

And when they go, Eliot feels comfortable in promising that he will keep them safe till their dying day. That he has the skills and intelligence to keep Hardison and Parker alive until they all retire together. It took him a while to get here, but he is finally comfortable with who he is and what he can do. What he does.

Eliot is smart enough to run with the best thieves in the world that more than counts as being intelligent in his book. And it’s not like Hardison or Parker let him forget it, they’re stubborn like that.

#rr writing #tw: suicidal thoughts #tw: self esteem issues #tw: voilence mention #eliot spencer #damien moreau #alec hardison #leverage parker #nathan ford #nate ford #sophie devereaux #leverage fic #leverage #leverage tv

[samijami]

My father just threatened to beat the shit out of my brother, throw a remote through my mother's head, and then kill himself

He just threatened to do all of that shit

And said he wanted to die, couldn't wait to die and said he'd stop taking his medication to just fucking kill himself

OVER A FUCKING ICE CREAM

#tw child abuse #child abuse #tw mention of suicide #verbal abuse #physical abuse #domestic voilence #personal vent #tw vent #vent post #vent

[can-ya-guess-my-curent-obsession]

Hiii! I hope you’re doing well! I was wondering if I could request Gorillaz x Singer!S/O? Like, they have a solo career, and occasionally collab with the band? I hope you have a great day, and thank you for your time whether you write this or not!<3

Gorillaz with soloist Singer S/O

WRITERS NOTE: Thank you so much, i hope you have a great day as well. Sorry about the bad grammar, my mod at the time is not active and sorry if I got to off track with the headcanons. Either way- I am so excited for my first request!

All art on this post is mine

Edited: At this time no, but will hopefully will be later

TW: Curssing, Drinking, Trama, Voilence, if I missed any tell me please and I will add it

Characters:

/Gorillaz/

Murdoc

Murdoc straight up jokes about you replacing 2D(often right in front of 2D). And sometimes it doesn't feel like hes jokeing even if he is

He likes to chill back stage with you- which he expects automatically that he gets to be in the back because he's his S/O's boyfriend and because he's the leader of the greatest band ever- his words not mine

If/When you collab he was iffy on wether he wanted you to duet with 2D at first because he's a bit jealous

But he can't argue with what sounds good, and the voice of his amazing S/O, and the voice of the singer in HIS BAND is something that is he needs for his next album

Murdoc will always talk about how he could go solo too if he wanted to, once he learned his S/O was a solo act

If he drinks too much when you guys are hanging out he will start singing himself, and encouraging his S/O to sing with him

When recording he will give you as nice of criticism as he can if your not hitting the right notes or arn't in the right pitch- but satan forbit one of the others try to give you constructive criticism, especially 2D

Whenever he has nightmares about his childhood and his dad, and his S/O's around he finds it comforting if his S/O hummed to him but he won't ask you to hum to him though because he's scared that you'ed think he's weak

And if your not around when he's haveing a nightmare, he'll listen to one of your songs to calm himself down

If his S/O's a smaller and less well known singer- he will often tells his S/O how he can hook them up with good produser(even if S/O already has one) and anything that you as a smaller creator may not have access to, and will promote you sometimes like on an interview

And even if you are just as popular he can be a bit stuck up and will be like 'Yeah but, Gorillaz is little bit more popular'

Murdoc has mentioned before that he's glad that your a soloist, because he would feel bad for your band mates because of how bad you would out shine them

He wants to lay his head on you, and let you sing to him but he's to nervous

"Dove you have quite the voice, I'd love to have you on my next album."

Noodle

Noodle is can be quite the extrovert, so she would love to go out and do karaoke with her S/O

Noodle was so excited when it was decided that her S/O and Gorillaz was going to collab, cuz it means being with her adopted family and her lover at the same time- she was just so happy to have the people she loved most in the same room

She almost tears up duing a live performance collab because everthing feels so perfect and amazing at that point in time she can't help be a bit emotional

Noodle will travel the world to see her S/O preform at concerts

She would be absolutely in love if her S/O could sing in different languages

She has all your albums, murch- everything

Noodle would be delited to help write your songs

ANY ONE WHO CRITICIZES HER S/O'S MUSIC WILL FACE HER WRATH, it doesn't matter if she likes the kind of music her S/O makes she will beat the shit out of anyone who is rude

She is your personal body guard, like why would you need a body guard when you have a Noodle

She introduced you to 2D and Russel before the collab because her S/O and 2D are both singers and she thought 2D needed a singer friend that wasn't connected through work, and Russel is her dad who did the most parenting so it was like a meet the parent situation Sorry Mudoc :/

She will ask her S/O to sing to her somtimes, most often when you two are alone

Noodle has a LOT of respect for her S/O because managing a music career by yourself can be quite hard, especially to her because she grew up in a band with other people so she could never imagine doing it alone

She like catching her S/O singing to themself when they are alone, because she loves to see her S/O flustered, and if you don't get flustered she still likes to see them surprised to see her

"Hey S/O, about our date- I was thinking.... karaoke!"

2D

2D is ecstatic to have a S/O that is also a singer

He is just so happy to have someone to relate to

Before 2D even starts dating his S/O(like in crush faze) he would have already asked S/O to do a collab as a way to get closer with them

Like Noodle, 2D owns a lot of his S/O's merchandise not as much as her but still a lot

He likes to atend his S/O's concerts but prefers to watch back stage because while he loves his fans and fan interactions he also hates the idea of taking attention away from his S/O at his S/O's concert, and due to his very recognizable appearance he is likely going to draw attention to himself in a crowd of people

2D will blab to anyone who will listen about his S/O and their solo career as a singer, this is the case often in interviews where the interviewers ask about y'alls relationship

When talking with his S/O and his S/O's career as a singer he has forgoten he was a singer himself

2D tends subconsciously sing or hum to himself, and if his S/O joined him in his little tune he would melt into putty- though it would take him a hot second to realize that they where singing with them

He's fascinated by the fact that his S/O's are a solo singer, and often asks you about it, though he often gets off track with his questions

PLEASE write a love song about him, if you do his heart will die of happiness

When it comes time for the collaboration 2D gets distracted constantly, by his S/O, and their voice specifically

While 2D getting distracted in the studio isn't new, but him getting distracted while recording is, as he tends to hyperfixate on singing when recording- but now half way through the lyrics he just slowly stops and stares at his S/O like nothing else in the world exists- with a goofy euphoric grin on his face, and when S/O stops cuz he stoped he'll mutter out praise about S/O's voice/singing Much to the others dissmay

"Wow... ya have such'a pretty voice luv"

Russel

Russel is a very supportive boyfriend

Out of all of the band mates he's the one that doesn't mind watching from the crowd the most- but much like 2D he doesn't like taking attention away from his S/O

If you show him the lyrics to a song you are working on he likes to suggest beats that might sound good with it

While Russel was happy to collaborate with his S/O, he's the least thrilled about it in the group- as he likes to balance his work life and home life as much as he can even though its really hard to so bring his love life into work life isn't exactly thrilling for him I mean did you see how it worked out for 2D

Russel is also the most professional when it comes time to collaborate with his S/O, like I said he tries to separate home life and work life and he does this by acting professional and trying to ignore the fact he is dating the person he is working with

Whenever the bands on tour and he misses his S/O he likes to listen to S/O's music even if it's not his type of music, but he usually won't really listen to the collab music at that time because it only makes him think of work(also no one but Noodle knows he does this)

And to add on to him and his S/O's music, Russel likes to suggest his S/O's music but he's very sublet about it

Besides actually collaborating as a work thing, he likes to help his S/O with their songs, whether it be helping with lyrics, what instruments to use, or with beats- though he rarely does this as he is usually he is exhausted with making music from work

He's overall just really chill about it in general, he's doesn't mind that your a soloist, and out of everyone he's the most neutral in that category

Though Russel sometimes jokes about how he's jealous that you don't have to deal with band mates and that he wishes he was a solo act or that he was in a band with his S/O instead

I mean Russel loves his band mates but sometimes they can be down right obnoxious *cough* 2D *cough* Murdoc

Also Russel likes helping his S/O pick out their stage outfit/make up for live performances and/or music videos

"Look'in and sound'en great hun."

#gorillaz x reader #murdoc x reader #noodle x reader #stuart pot x reader #2d x reader #russel hobbs x reader #russel x reader #murdoc niccals #murdoc gorillaz #noodle gorillaz #2d gorillaz #stuart pot #russel hobbs

[kpopjust4u]

Life changing situations.

Post Date: 24th July 2022 Content: Angst - EXO Baekhyun x Reader (DNI if voilence, pregancy etc is a sensitive topic for you) WC: 1.4K  TW?: Fuck Boy! x Mafia! Baekhyun/ Pregnant Reader/ Mentions of Abuse/ Mention of Abortion/ Arguement/ Lack of Care/ Unestablished Relationship/ Slight Suggestiveness/ Mention of Violence/ Name calling/ Controlling Request?: Yes Masterlist                                    Prompt list

At was all fun and games when you had Baekhyun up against you in the alleyway behind the bar, kissing all up and down your neck, making you hungry for his touch and attention which you have fought for all night with various women who were clingy themselves off of him. You couldn’t blame them, he was stunning and yet intriguing. He didn’t seem the type to work for an office or anything, he was kitted out with the most expensive suits, and watches, and always made sure that his jacket covered something in his belt. Something about his secrecy drew you into him, making him irresistible.

“Let’s take this back to my place,” you wink at him and he willingly agrees, wondering where the night would take him. Though what you didn’t realise then was that he wasn’t going to be around for the long run, that you were just one of his toys to play with. To pick up and then dump whenever he pleases, without any questions or explanations given to the plenty of women he’s had a rep with. 

However you felt special, he made you feel like the only one, carrying you through your front door, kissing all over you and was incredibly good with his hands, and his mouth. The way he worked on you, made you feel like he couldn’t get enough, wanting to come back to that a lot more often, however, a month later, you’ve rarely seen him. Especially since you noticed the gun on his belt the morning after, panicking that he was planning to murder you, but found himself reassuring you that he had no intentions to, just part of his job. 

It’s been a month, a month and things felt worse off than they should. You realised that you’d never get to see him again, but what else has he done to you. The constant sickness, headaches, backache... you couldn’t be. A one-night stand wouldn’t result in pregnancy, however, tears flooded your eyes as you stare down at the positive stick in your hand, shaking profusely at the answer handed to you. It seemed impossible but the umpteenth time you take that test, it all comes out with the same answer. 

Days later, after isolating yourself away from everyone, you had to find out where he was, hoping that the bar you had met him in a year ago, would hold him there. Well, the women to hold him there, as god knows who else he’s got under his belt. 

As you walk in, things seemed off, and suspicious, it was barely full and you notice two of the bodyguards whispering to each other in front of a door, a sign stating ‘PRIVATE’. God knows what Baekhyun does as a job but you knew there was something behind that door to explain it all. After pushing past all the anxieties, anger fills you, remembering that he left you thinking you’d see him again, and now you’re pregnant with his child. 

“Excuse me, is Mr Byun in there?” you ask, facing the bodyguards who tower over you, smirking down at you as they admire what a pretty little thing they thought you were, “What’s a pretty one like you doing in here?” one mutters, smirking as he watches you slowly get anxious in front of them, as the other answers your questions, “Mr Byun doesn’t want to see anyone at the moment. Can I leave him a message for you?”.

You roll your eyes incredibly hard at the response, attempting to push past them to get through the door but they grab you, holding you inches above the floor by your arm and back, pushing you back towards the stairs. “I said Mr Byun doesn’t want to see any-” one of them starts to growl, coming to silence when hearing the lock of the door behind them clicking, brushing up their act as if nothing has just happened. “What’s going on out here, boys?” Baekhyun asks, unable to see you behind the tall, broad guard, nodding to his clientele goodbye as they dash out of their office, looking extremely suspicious with their large bag. 

“I want to speak to you,” you call out from behind, the guard shifting over slightly to expose you to Baekhyun, who smirks but says nothing, nodding to the guards to back down their guard, flinching his head towards the inside of the room for you to access, pushing past him as you do. “Well, well, well. Look who’s back for another round, my gorgeous little thing,” he growls, locking the door behind him, eyes gawking at you as you turn around, followed by a hard slap across his face as he tries to place his arms around you. 

Expecting a negative response, you flinch backwards, but all he does is clutch his cheek, scoffing in amusement as he lets go of it, bringing his hands together to clap, as if to applaud you for such a great slap. Seconds later, he’s weakly holding his hands up, “I get it, I haven’t been in the best of contact with you. But I’m a busy man, doll”. The name doll makes your stomach churn, realising that he has absolutely no shame at all. 

With anger building up inside of you, and with the other hormones from being pregnant also present, you get ready to raise a hand to slap him again but back off, trying to keep a steady breath as you try to get ready to announce the news to him. “Now why did you want to see me? To get more of me, or thinking about a new job option?” he asks, tone calm but enticing, but you try not to fall into the trap that he set up the first time. 

“Neither, I’m here because I’m pregnant. And it’s your child, Baekhyun,” you bite accidentally, watching his face go dark, his eyes dropping as if he’s about to lose it. With a loud bang, his fist makes contact with his desk, shaking his precious belongings that lay on it. “How dare you come in here and lie to me!” He shouts, bringing tears to your eyes as you try to stay strong, to hold your ground.

“That isn’t thing isn’t mine, you filthy whore!” he barks, and you couldn’t believe it, how could the lady man, the beautiful human be so vile? “It is! You’re the only person I’ve slept with in the last two months!” you cry, trying to get him to back down but see no avail. “Take this money, go get an abortion, now!” he continues to shout, making your bones shiver, a massive sum of money being forced into your hands. 

“I will not! I haven’t thought about whether or not I’m keeping it yet! And you don’t get to make that choice for me!” you angrily slam the cash down on his desk, but with a quick swift force, you’ve been pinned up again the wall. “Either you get that abortion, or I’ll kill that thing myself. You got me?” his voice is dark, growling into your ear before placing a soft kiss on your cheek. You choke under his hold around your throat, coughing for air the second he leaves go, falling to the floor. 

“Get her out of her, make sure she takes this with her,” Baekhyun calls to his guards, you force the money into your back and they manhandle you, dragging you out of the room and out of the bar. Sitting on the sidewalk, tears create a puddle beneath you. Trying to come to terms with what just happened, you’re unsure of what to do now, there was no point in convincing him that you’re going to have the baby whether or not he likes it, but you didn’t want to get an abortion just in case you regretted it later down the line. 

Whilst in your train of thought, you felt a strong presence behind you, grabbing you by the hair and pulling your head back, Baekhyun lowers himself behind you. “I have two options for you, drop everything for me and have the possibility the baby stays alive, as well as you...” he scoffs, laughing at himself knowing his own tricks too well, “Or you’ll lose everything, along with that child”. Of course, you knew what option you had to go for, not knowing whether or not to trust him, but you just wanted to live, your baby too. Any chance was now worth the risk. . 

#kpop #kpop blog #kpop reactions #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop fanfic #exo #exo reactions #exo scenarios #exo imagines #exo angst #exo baekhyun #exo baekhyun imagines #baekhyun imagines #baekhyun angst

[ao3feed-tedlasso]

weave your little webs

by floweredhalo

“Sorry,” Sounds more like sorreh, “can you uh, stitch me back up again?” Roy can now see the large gash across his stomach and the cut on his jaw. He hisses through his teeth and winces in solidarity with the man. Roy just stares at him. Spiderman cocks his head and puts a hand on his hip as if to say well?

“Yeah yeah, come on then.” Spiderman trails after him, thankfully not dripping blood on the wood floors. Though Roy thinks he wouldn’t mind cleaning up the mess. “Spidertwat.” Spiderman laughs at that.

another 5+1: 5 times Roy patches up Spiderman and the 1 time he patches up Jamie (Or the one where Jamie is Spiderman and he keeps showing up hurt.)

Words: 12929, Chapters: 1/2, Language: English

Fandoms: Ted Lasso (TV)

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: M/M

Characters: Roy Kent, Jamie Tartt, Coach Beard (Ted Lasso), Colin Hughes

Relationships: Roy Kent/Jamie Tartt

Additional Tags: hello hello hello !!!!!, spiderman!au, Hurt/Comfort, Pining, jamie is pretty much always bleeding so tw for wounds stitches blood etc, anyway, once again my pretty baby agenda lives on, Protective Roy Kent, Roy Kent Needs a Hug, another 5+1, mentions of o’brien and bumbercatch and trent, jamie’s spiderman was bit by a spider n has webs that shoot out of his wrists, because lets be real that boy is not mixing up formulas and making web shooters, no real scenes of voilence, only the after bits, beard sees all, neither is a footballer, jamies just spiderman, and roy owns a gay bar and is grumpy, typical, i will update tags with chapter 2, but roy is not a footballer so hes a bit more emotionally available

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/48696487

#Ted Lasso #Ted Lasso Fic #ao3feed

[twilightprince101]

In case anyone wants my opinion on all the current events going on, I think these protests and riots deserve to happen. If you’re wondering why, let me give a play by play of events from the past few months:

-Quarantine goes into effect, leading to countless people losing their jobs and those who didn’t are considered “heroes.”

-The same “heroes” have their pay decreased, so those who didn’t lose their jobs can’t even get by anymore.

-Marginalized groups are hit especially hard, especially black people who already had to face discrimination at work through lower pay (and likely were the first to be fired by racist bosses) are hit even worse.

-The government rolls out a stimulus check to people (which barely isn’t even that much), but landlords and debters refuse to freeze rent and payment, causing these groups to get into worse debt or even become homeless.

-Hordes of white nationalist protesters show up on government property with several guns and harass police and officials to protest against quarantine. Yes, there are members of those protesters who genuinely needed their jobs back, but there were also several that protested just so they could get their hair cut again.

-These protesters who threaten government officials with guns on government property are waived as peaceful protesters, since a gun wasn’t fired.

-George Floyd, a man accused of shopping with a counterfeit $20, is handcuffed, forced to the ground (with a police car over his body so he couldn’t fight back) and choked for over eight minutes as he pleads with the officer that he couldn’t breathe. 

-A Black Lives Matter protest for George’s death, with little to no weapons whatsoever, is met with tear gas and rubber bullets for blocking the roads.

So yeah, I think that this stuff deserves to happen. The drastic difference with how the police treat the different protests and the manner of how George Floyd was killed, it’s painfully clear that black people are fed up with how they’ve been treated. They deserve to be absolutely fucking furious.

They’re raiding stores and ATM’s because they need the money and supplies for their families to survive. They lost their jobs and begging for charity does next to nothing. Don’t agree? Try putting yourself in their shoes: your family is starving and there is no way for you to earn money. If you wanted to keep the ones you loved from starving on the street, you’d do whatever it takes.

I don’t like the fact that these riots are happening, but I feel like they should happen. They have tried peaceful protest countless times, but they were doing next to nothing and people weren’t listening. 

And don’t try to invoke the name of MLK or Ghandi or whoever the fuck you point to in the name of peaceful protest. If any of those people you point to were alive today in America, they’d be killed for the sole charge of resisting arrest.

Peaceful protest is no longer working to fight against the injustice. These riots have been a long time coming. 

#black lives matter #george floyd #voilence mention #violence #gun mention #gun #gun tw #violence tw #protests #riots #pandemic #((Don't preach the name of Ghandi in the country where he'd be choked for resisting arrest)) #((And also keep in mind: This is coming from somebody who "has it good #I was lucky to be born into a family that doesn't have to worry too much about getting by #But looking at the rest of the world and the people who are suffering? #They deserve to be mad))

[im-a-goat-in-disguise]

Respect Pan people or you’ll be hit with a pile of lava-hot lasagne they cooked up on their pans. Respect Bi people or you’ll be returned home Bit By Bit. Respect Gay people or fear the leprechaun. Respect POC or starve. Respect those with ODD or face the guillotine. Respect those with Autism or be turned into asparagus. Respect Lesbians or leg it, I'm coming for you. Respect Disabled People or be Destroyed by a Disaster. Respect Trans people or take a Trip to hell. Respect Asexuals or be Assaulted. Respect Gender-nonconforming/fluid people or be liquidised. Respect Questioning people or become a Cracker.

#voilence tw #food mention tw #death tw #harm tw #implied harm tw #ask to tag

[theartofruling]

Jacques + Toby 

@etherealfaefolk​

Once he’d attended to making sure the people that he loved were safe, Jack unbuttoned the cuffs of his shirt, pushing the sleeves up his arms. He’d left his jacket with Aida in case she was chilly, and now was the time for him to exact revenge on the man that harmed his sister. His wings were glamoured so that he could blend with the humans at first glance. That would be all he needed. Just a moment. 

It didn’t take long for him to find the man, because he questioned and tortured every human he came into contact with. Some of them would be able to live to tell the tale, some of them...well they were now dearly departed. He left a mess in his wake, dropping bodies. Making sure with each one, to clean the mess from his hands, make sure not a hair was out of place. 

He was methodic as he hunted down the man. His mind on a singular focus. His sister’s words ringing in his head. I want him dead, Jack. The rage that often lay dormant within him was out in full force now. Bodies, blood, watching the life leave their eyes as he made his way to the man that had caused his rage was completely and utterly satisfying. It was freeing even. With each blow to those that got in his way, he grinned, laughed even. Normally reserved, Jacques was having a blast, leaving a trail of blood and bodies in his way. 

When he finally found him. The one responsible for his injured sister, he walked up beside him, hand gripping the back of his neck, ramming him hard into the nearest wall. “Hello there, I’m Jack. Happy to make your acquaintance.” He punctuated the sentence with a powerful punch. “I’ll be your waking nightmare for the rest of your short life. You hurt my sister, and now I have to introduce you to death.” 

#+jacques #+jacques:toby #ahqevent2 #tw voilence #tw blood mention #tw murder #//let me know if this is good!

[ghoulia-roborts]

I can never be something like an assassin or a hit man because my hit would be like "NOOOO DON'T KILL ME" or something like that and I'd be too polite to continue my work.

"you didn't kill them because they said no!?"

"hey no means no okay"

#haha #lol #raindrop thoughts #random post #murder mention tw #voilence

[fuckyeahasexual]

I love how aphobes are like "nobodys ever been killed for being ace" when like im sure we have been, murder after corrective rape happens, people and doctors constantly telling us theres something wrong with us can drive us to suicide. Just because it happens less often, doesn't mean it doesn't happen at all.

I’m also only posting the hate ask below because it’s proximity to this one.

You cannot go on about “nobodies ever been killed for being ace” and then go on to make reference to a homophobic meme with a slur in the original about swap it out about running over aces.

“But Rose, they aren’t the same people.”

I don’t care. One person says it’s okay to harm another group and then another person does it.

It’s not funny, and “”joking”” about harming lgbtq people is not activism, it’s social violence.

#tw for ts #acephobia tw #death mention tw #voilence tw #blue space #rape tw #suicide tw #violence tw #helps if I spell it right huh

[mafiapriincess]

“Please hang on for just a few seconds longer!”

[ @im-the-strongest || Meme || Accepting ]

“I…I don’t think I can…” Her words were quietly mumbled as she tried to look at Saeran. Her vision was already BLURRY and she knew that, in a few seconds, she would fade into the world of darkness. Mary always had been scared of dying, no matter the circumstances. She knew that a live among crime would lead her to such a dead end sooner or later but she never thought it would be this soon. There were so many things she regretted and so many things she wanted to say and do. However, the time was slowly slipping through her hands just like the BLOOD that had colored her white shirt into a crimson red. 

Was this what dying felt like? She was scared but for some reason she managed to stay calm.( It could be because she was slowly losing her energy to breath or because she wasn’t alone.) It was strange, the whole situation. In the one moment she was still trying to fight against someone and tried to PROTECT Saeran and in the next moment she laid on the ground, bleeding. 

Without realizing it really, she closed her eyes. This was a fight she was going to LOSE but maybe there was the chance that she really could be saved before it was too late. With the last bit of her power remaining, she smiled at him. “It’s….okay…” Her words were just below a soft whisper before she finally fell into the unknown pitch black darkness. If nothing would happen in the next few minutes she would die for sure. 

#im-the-strongest #;TW: Blood #;TW: Death Mention #;TW: Death #;TW: voilence #//I hope I didn't forget to tag anything! #//ALSO YOU WANT ANGST YOU GET ANGST #┌ █ ▌ ♔ ╳ The Answer hidden in mystery┊ ┐ ~Answered

[n-naturely]

If anyone wants to know what's happening in my life someone on social media said they're gonna shoot up my school tomorrow and if they did I wouldn't even be shocked because it happens all the time, someone almost shot up the our neighboring school

Living in America is awesome

#it could've been another school because the school name mentioned was an acronym #like a shortened version of the school name #so there are other schools in my state that the person could be talking about but like there's a chance its mine #honestly the sad thing is its probably fake and its being treated like a joke #when literally a school in Michigan got shot up and they literally got a warning before #the reason the school didn't close? #they had gotten so many fake threats they couldn't tell what was real #even though it might be fake if that isn't confirmed by tomorrow morning I swear I might not go even though there'll be police #tw gun #tw gun violence #tw school shooting #tw voilence #random

[deathlessdamned]

screwthejob said: “I don’t think a band aid is gonna fix this…”

‘Probably not...’ { DISCOMFORT ran through taut muscles; blade lodged deep deep between the ribs bordering on excruciating. ( Dean’s voice was like white noise, fading in and out with each passing second. Cain released a gasp; knowing that time was slowly ebbing away. ) Counting down the time until his temporary demise. Ah well - it had only been a matter of time. } ‘So I’ll be back shortly then.’

#voilence tw #knife mention tw #screwthejob #† | Yeah it's way too many feels ; way too much emotion. ( Roleplay Prompt. )

[kiame-sama]

I don't know if anyone has asked this yet or not, but how did your OCs ask their darlings out or if they did at all? And they did ask them out,I would love to know what the date was like.

Walter can be quite the romantic at heart and will do all in his power to convince his darling to be with him.

Once he has established a generally positive relationship with his darling, he will begin gently prompting and prodding. "Would you like to get dinner with me one of these nights?" If his darling doesn't pick up on the hints, he will progressively become more forward and to the point. "I would love to take you on a date, or several." "We should date." "I want us to be in a romantic relationship."

He will do what best fits his darling when it comes to dating. Would you like to go somewhere fancy and get all dressed up? He can do that for you, let him make the reservations. Would you like to have a small date of food and watching a meteor shower? Walter will religiously check for the next meteorological event and will plan all you need in advance. Just let him show you his devotion to you, please.

He will do what he can to insert himself into your life and will suggest things like play-dates for your pets all so he can win you over. Ideally you have just as intense of a respect for life as he does, and he will try to interest you in walking around the research and rehabilitation center that is his countless acres of land. "You know, it is fun to feed the tigers when they are being playful." "Do you know many people don't realize the care needed for wolf-dogs?"

He will do as promised and take you on your first date by visiting the different creatures he takes care of. From the tigers, to the mustangs, to the elephants, even all the way to Mimis the house serval. He will introduce you and- depending on the animal + their mood- let you be up-close and personal with the animals. The elephants love you and the matriarch of the herd grows a particular fondness towards you.

Really, it all depends on if he has already kidnapped you or not. If he has kidnapped you already, you are basically forced to attend your dates with him, every exit blocked by armed guards and your captor watching every bite you take with a bit too much interest.

If he has not yet kidnapped you, he goes about it more of a traditional way. Exchange numbers, text and get to know each other- even though he already knows most if not all there is to know about you- and then asks you on a date to a nice little restaurant that he owns. It is there he suggests a longer relationship with you, your answer determining if he keeps up the docile approach or flat out kidnaps you.

Jackson tries very hard to get you to like him before he suggests a date, not wanting to push you into anything too quickly and risk the chance that he could lose you. When he does manage to get you on a date with him, he will take you out to go star-gazing and to have a little picnic dinner with him. The date is crashed by a group of drunk men who take too much of an interest in you. Jackson will try to stay calm, but the moment they try to touch you is the moment he snaps. After he has finished dealing with the trash that is the drunk men, he will apologize, legitimately upset with himself that they managed to ruin the date. He practically begs you to let him take you on another date and try again, wanting the picture-perfect date he has dreamed of taking you on.

Amira will actually ask you to attend a hockey game or a football game at her university with her, trying to make it seem like leas of a big deal than it actually is to her. She will have a great time with you and is happy to talk with you during the entire game if you get bored with whatever sport is being played. She would prefer hockey because that gives her an excuse to stay cuddled close to you seeing as it is very cold in the stands of an ice-rink. Kiss cam will put you on the spot and will only encourage her to just take her chance and go for it.

To Kaya, a date is studying the unique stress response of a rare island plant when presented with a plant-eating insect or parasite. She really finds those kinds of subjects to be the most fascinating way to have a date. Tea, anyone? Botanical gardens and letting her spout off the random facts she knows about whichever plant has her attention at that moment. She is so excited to show you everything she knows that she may even forget it is supposed to be a date and not a botany lesson. Her love of plants is clear and she wants to show you that she has the same love- maybe even stronger- for you.

Julie is an artist and she loves seeing the personality of a person in their art. Even if you are not particularly artistic or have only had a few moments to actually focus on art, she will do her best to make sure you have something you've made yourself come the end of the date. A painting, a clay figurine, glass work, anything you choose to work on, she will cherish and help you through the process. If you are an old art pro, she is just as happy to give you the materials and let you create. The joy of expression through medium such as art is Julie's ideal date.

Aquarium time! Ever been behind the scenes at an aquarium and allowed to play with the dugongs? Well, you can now. Hada is a fairly respected marine biologist despite her younger age from those who have dedicated their lives to the research they conduct. She will get everything set up before asking you on the date, making sure you say yes so she can show off her intelligence and research that she has conducted herself. She is proud to share this knowledge with you and share as many experiences as possible with you.

What is this "dating" thing you speak of? Ollphéist is an elder God and sees no point in restraining themselves from you and the joy your presence alone brings them great comfort. You are the main object of this elder God's affections and you will have to live with that because they will kidnap you the moment they get the chance. Better to just let yourself become removed from it all and let Ollphéist do as they wish.

#x reader #yandere #kiame-sama #yandere x reader #reader insert #my oc #my original characters #yandere oc #jackson locklear #carlos vargas #evan rothchester #walter woods #amira woods #hada yamare #kaya braziel #julie winter #my ocs do not steal #tw yandere #tw mention of kidnapping #tw mention of voilence #tw toxic relationship

[pantton-sandacers]

Virgil: Hey, you know who's gay? You.

Roman: *stabs Virgil with a sword*

Virgil: Aw, c'mon.

#source: asdfmovie #my quotes #quotes #anxiety sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #princey sanders #stabbing mention #voilence tw #thomas sanders #sanders sides #pantton-sandacers posts