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#the legendary sass master
blippin · 1 year
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simpforfandom231 · 4 months
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Jealous golden retriever
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paring: Rachel Zegler x Fem!reader
Summory: Rachel and Y/N are doing the red carpet for the new movie when suddenly a cute boy tries to flirt with Y/N. Let's say the red carpet becomes a comedy show on it's own.
A/N: it's a bit similar to the one with lucy gray but who gives a fuck, both are just sassy queens and I love a good old jealous fanfic.
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It was a glamorous night at the movie premiere for Rachel Zegler's latest blockbuster. The red carpet was rolled out, cameras flashed, and Hollywood glittered in all its splendor. Rachel, the perpetually bubbly and cheerful girlfriend, bounced around like a ball of sunshine. Y/N, on the other hand, exuded an air of confidence that dared anyone to mess with her.
As they mingled with the A-list crowd, Y/N's protective instincts kicked in. She kept a watchful eye on Rachel, navigating through the sea of people with a no-nonsense attitude. Little did Y/N know that the night was about to take an unexpected turn.
Enter the cute boy, possibly an actor, who sauntered up to Y/N with a smug grin. He started laying on the charm thick, blissfully unaware that he was treading on dangerous territory. Rachel, witnessing this from a distance, felt a pang of jealousy that sent her into action.
In her attempt to shoo away the boy, Rachel chirped, "Um, excuse me, Mr. Smooth Operator. She's taken, and trust me, you're not her type. Her type is more 'I'll break your nose if you mess with my girlfriend' kind of guy." The boy, seemingly immune to Rachel's warning, continued his pursuit.
Undeterred, Rachel turned to Y/N with a faux-sweet smile. "Sweetie, should I fetch the newspaper to swat this pesky boy away?" she quipped, batting her eyelashes. Y/N rolled her eyes, suppressing a smirk.
But the boy, as if on a mission to test Rachel's patience, kept pushing his luck. Rachel's golden retriever charm started to wear thin. In a tone that was more lioness than puppy, she warned him, "You really shouldn't mess with me. I once stared down a raccoon for stealing my sandwich. You think you stand a chance?"
As the red carpet spectacle unfolded, the cute boy persisted in his pursuit of Y/N, seemingly oblivious to the protective force that was Rachel Zegler. Rachel, her golden retriever vibe now hanging by a thread, shot him a look that could have melted steel.
Undeterred, the boy smiled at Rachel, cocky as ever. "Look Sandwich girl, Didn't know I needed your permission to talk to your girlfriend." Rachel's eyes narrowed, but her comeback was ready.
"Listen, Romeo, the only permission you need is to exit stage left before things get Shakespearean," Rachel fired back with a playful yet pointed warning. The co-stars, catching wind of the banter, started chuckling, sensing the impending showdown.
One of Rachel's co-stars, a witty sidekick in the film, joined the fray. "Hey, buddy, just a heads up, Rachel here once arm-wrestled a bear. And won. So, tread carefully." The boy, not one to be outdone, retorted, "Yeah, well, I once beat a cockroach in a staring contest. So, bring it on, Grizzly."
The banter escalated, with the co-stars now taking turns jokingly warning the boy about Rachel's legendary protective streak. Meanwhile, Rachel, still trying to skedaddle the boy away, threw in her own snarky remarks. "Oh, so you beat a cockroach? I've beaten Monopoly in under an hour. Try me."
But the boy, seemingly unfazed, made a daring move. He circled back for round two, confident smirk intact. This time, Rachel's golden retriever patience had run out.
She leaned in, eyes ablaze, and said, "Look, buddy, I've got a black belt in sass, a PhD in sarcasm, and a master's degree in making people regret their life choices. So, take a step back before you become the subject of my next blockbuster – 'The Boy Who Poked the Wrong Golden Retriever.'"
The co-stars, now in stitches, egged on the boy, goading him with laughter. Undeterred, he shot back, "You know, grizzly girl, I thought your job was acting, not barking."
Rachel, now fuming, unleashed her snarkiest warnings yet. "Oh, honey, you're about to witness a performance that won't win me an Oscar but might earn you a one-way ticket to Regretsville. Population: you."
As the banter reached a crescendo, Y/N, thoroughly entertained, watched the showdown unfold. The co-stars, realizing the comedy gold they were witnessing, cheered Rachel on, knowing that the boy had just stepped into the ring with Hollywood's sassiest protector.
the boy decided to up the ante. In a misguided attempt to provoke Rachel, he leaned in to kiss Y/N's cheeks, a move calculated to get under Rachel's skin. The co-stars, now aware that the boy had just taken a leap into a lion's den, exchanged amused glances, silently acknowledging that he was now on his own for this reckless maneuver.
Rachel, witnessing the cheeky move, shot the boy a look that could freeze lava. With a sarcastic smirk, she commented, "Oh, how original. Did you come up with that all by yourself or did the cockroach coach you?" The co-stars erupted in laughter, sensing the brewing storm.
The banter escalated, with the boy making a snarky comment about Rachel being a "pocket-sized powerhouse." Rachel, embracing her inner stand-up comedian, fired back, "Well, at least I can fit into a purse. Can you fit your ego into one?" The co-stars erupted in laughter, their appreciation for Rachel's snark reaching new heights.
But the boy, perhaps fueled by a misguided sense of invincibility, went further. "You must get lost in crowds. How do you even find Y/N?" he jeered. Rachel, her humor now veering into dangerous territory, replied, "Oh, it's easy. I just follow the sound of Y/N shouting my name in bed every night. Works like a charm."
The co-stars, now holding back tears of laughter, watched as the boy's cocky demeanor began to crumble. Frustration and annoyance painted his face. "What's the matter, Goldilocks? Can't handle a little friendly banter?" he taunted.
Rachel, her patience finally snapping like a twig, shot back with a dangerous edge, "Friendly banter is like a two-way street, sweetheart. What you're doing is more like a reckless joyride in the opposite direction of a cliff."
As Rachel warned the boy, Y/N, sensing the rising tension, tried to ease her girlfriend. The boy, seizing the opportunity to throw more fuel on the fire, commented, "Aww, isn't that sweet? Little Rachel has her knight in shining armor."
"Did he just....he did say that didn't he?" Rachel was fuming and ready to actually kill the boy and when Y/N sensed the shift in Rachel she stepped in. "look boy, just go because if mama bear here explodes nobody will lift a finger to help you." Y/N said and actually scared now, the boy backed away. As the night progressed, the battle became a story in the history books but Y/N could not be prouder.
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princesscolumbia · 6 months
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So about the musical episode...
This is specifically geared to "Subspace Rhapsody," which if you haven't watched it shame on you go now and watch go go go go!!!
So by the end of the ep everything goes back to normal and it turns out the real musical ensemble was the friends we made along the way etc., but what if it didn't?!
Yes, there'd be immediate consequences; highly classified secrets getting out, relationships starting and ending, etc.
But humans adapt, and since the other species in the galaxy are the same kind of "fuck you, I'm surviving!" results of evolution, they'd all adapt, too.
First off, the big one: It'd be like that post where somehow Anakin and Obi-wan can hear the musical score an realize Palpatine is a sith lord; the bad guys would be outed, like, the SECOND their musical number started up. Khan would have been identified before the Enterprise even finished scanning the Botony Bay, the Prime Directive would have to get a big 'ol asterisk pointing to a clause describing the specific mathematical properties of different types of music the crew can expect to hear when approaching a potential first contact. Science experiments would be (metaphorically) killed on the spot because the "mad scientist" theme would start playing.
But a century on? Well, everyone would have adapted...
The Vulcans would have come up with an entirely new discipline; Rhythmic Logic. Rather akin to rap, it'd be syncopated speaking with periodic inflections to denote emphasis on certain points, and the passive aggressive sass levels would be off the CHARTS. Counterintuitive to most Vulcan training for centuries, to properly learn and master this new discipline, the Vulcans would need to induce moments of high emotion to properly initiate the musical triggering conditions, but once started their logic and ability to freestyle would then be put to use to focus and direct the song.
Andorians would be less about the singing and more about choreography. Their troop movements would be works of martial art and their ability to synchronize with each other during operations (any operation, whether medical, business, black-ops, etc.) would be legendary throughout the galaxy. When xenoanthropologists start proposing theories, the truth is swiftly buried for the sanity of the galaxy; since the "musical universe" is based on human musicals, Andorian affinity for good choreography is rooted in figure skating.
Tellarites would unabashedly embrace Weird Al as a sort-of prophet/god once they figured out that parody is the sincerest form of insult. Whatever musical number you're performing, the Tellarites will ride on top of it and twist it in crass ways until the song they sing drowns out whatever they're parodying and is considered the superior work. This, amusingly, results in relations between Tellar and Earth to improve as "bards" of both races across every strata of society compete to see who can make the better parody.
Romulans would lean into the villain pieces, like, unironically. Go to a diplomatic party on Romulus and you're beset by a massive orchestral work of interweaving harmonies as a melody of every big number and quiet ballad are melded together in a symphony of intrigue, emotion, politics, and betrayal. Yes, there's good Romulans, but because their music is JUST as "villainous" as the heroes, it's nearly impossible to tell them apart. Somewhat ironically, it's That One Romulan who only sings spritely songs in a major key that turns out to be the baddest, most lethal Romulan of all.
Klingon society would fracture into new houses based on musical style. The "Old Guard" would be the Klingons who break out into Klingon Opera on the regular. K-pop would be known for being vicious berserkers. Shakespere may be beloved by the Klingons, but the Soviet Anthems would become THE way to unify the Klingons during the "cold war" era.
Once the effect stretched into the Delta Quadrant (nobody in the quadrant knows why they've suddenly started breaking into song, and it isn't until well after Voyager returns home that someone in a university history department is given access to the full history of the Borg's interaction with Starfleet that they realize that it was Q launching the Enterprise D into the Delta Quadrant that created the contact), the Hirogen would come to be known for their absolutely epic power-metal ballads. Their "hunting axes" would become some variety of electric guitar almost overnight.
Because Voyager's crew had grown up with the "random" musicals, Voyager has a leg up on the entire Delta Quadrant, further solidifying Janeway as an unmitigated badass when she uses her absolute mastery of the musical forms to kick ass in every genre.
Cultures that had been introduced to warp flight badly (turns out the Federation had the right idea with the Prime Directive, just not for reasons that anyone could have ever predicted) can always be identified as being...cut rate. It'd be like going from a Broadway Musical production of Hamilton to encountering that one "Christian" production where they butchered the lyrics and the "b-list" actors were the best they could get.
Cardasians would be all about the martial themes. Even their counterculture movements would be all about the percussion-heavy 4:4 musical numbers.
Bajorans would be split between Broadway Musical-style numbers that seem to take inspiration from plays like "West Side Story" and Epic Battle Hymns sung by every Bajoran involved in a given conflict that reach deep into your soul and make you feel simultaneously victorious and deeply sad for reasons you can't quite identify.
The Borg would be EDM for some reason. Nobody is quite sure why.
Even the species that sent the whale probe in the 23rd century wouldn't be spared. Dubstep...dubstep everywhere!
Section 31 and the Tal Shiar would be in a black-ops weapons race to see who can weaponize the musicals the most effectively.
Time travelers would have a blast. Turns out the big reason for the Temporal Cold War was to stop a massive Temporal Prime Directive violating wave of time tourists who just want to go back to a time before musicals were a fact of life. Mariner and Boimler wouldn't even realize they hadn't broken out into song once until they returned to the 24th century.
Humans would be driving everyone nuts. A species that had adapted to using Rent-style musical numbers to form social collectives that were so "in-crowd" that nobody else could even think of joining would suddenly find this one asshole human that picked up on it and was fitting in perfectly. Klingon slasher ballads would be met with children's cartoon bubbly pop music. Andorians would be simultaneously overjoyed at having companions that could work so perfectly with them and appalled that another species dared to get on the ice with them.
The only beings immune to the whole thing would be the Q. The reason Q was the one interacting with Picard? He's the only Q that can stand the whole universe turning into a musical! He's "the band nerd" in Q high school, the one that'll break into a situationally appropriate musical hit number from that one Broadway play when nobody wants to hear you singing Q! Q doesn't have to sing like the lesser species, but by golly he WANTS to and he's GONNA!
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skyloftian-nutcase · 3 months
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Zelda: According to the ancient texts, the legendary hero has always appeared initially in as one of these roles; a knight, a farm hand or a blacksmith. He also usually resides in some kind of forest area, so that's where we're going to look next.
Gerudo Link: *Rolling his eyes* Going by that logic should we also check the skies as well if we're going for any hero sightings in the last... Oh I don't know, 100,000 years or so?!
.......Cut to a small village in the edge of a forgotten forest........
G!Link: You seriously think that one of your 'legendary heroes' is going to be here?
Zelda: Just shush and help me look...
Villager: *Approaches them on a chestnut mare with a white mane and tail* Are you two lost?
.....The villager is a young man around the age of the fabled hero with a sword strapped securely to his back....
G!Link: Got any heroes around here?
Villager: None who would be taken with any measure of seriousness, why?
Zelda: Aha! But there's one!
Villager: you're free to look around. Just don't cause trouble.
......The villager leaves leaving the two to look around....
G!Link: So I asked around and the villagers had some pretty interesting things to say about our friend with the horse.
Zelda: Go on...
G!Link: Well for starters he protects this village from the surrounding monsters.
Zelda: mhm...
G!Link: He works on the local ranch using his horse to help with the herding.
Zelda: mhm! Mhm!
G!Link: The sword he carries he forged himself.
Zelda: That's it! He has to be the legendary hero we're searching for!
G!Link:...the legendary hero YOU'RE searching for...
.......They approach the villager in question.....
Villager: can I he-
Zelda: *cutting him off* I do believe I have finally found one worthy of wielding the blade of evil's bane!
Villager: What are you-
Zelda: No no. There's no need to be modest about it. I've been searching for one with the hero's spirit for some time now! And out of everyone who I've encountered you fit the bill entirely!
Villager: Umm... *Looks to G!Link who offers no help*
Zelda: What's your name? Oh who am I kidding you're obviously named Link!
Villager: I'm not-
Zelda: Come, there's been enough time wasted already we must move to collect the Master Sword and awaken you to the powers that lie within the hero.
G!Link: Zelda... Maybe let the guy speak?
Zelda: Oh, right... Say your piece hero.
Villager: I don't think I'm who you're looking for...
Zelda: But you're the perfect match! A young warrior who protects the people with the spirit of courage!
Villager: What?
Zelda: Your name's Link... Is it not...?
Villager: No... My name's Daniel... If you want Link he's at the ranch.
....Zelda goes to the ranch....
Zelda: I'm here to see Link.
Ranch owner: Uhh.... Sure, he's over here.
....The ranch owner walks over to a blonde hylian boy who's brushing a goat...
Ranch hand: Well Link, you've got a visitor.
Zelda: *Rushing to the blonde* Link!? Oh this is great I knew visiting this village wasn't a complete loss.
Ranch owner: *Laughing* Your highness. The boy isn't Link.
Zelda: He... Isn't?
Ranch owner: No! Link's the goat.
Zelda: WHATT!?
....Cut to the inn....
Zelda: *wrapped up in a blanket sniffling* So far... So very far... A five day journey... FOR A GOAT!!
G!Link: you know... Link, The Goat of Legend has a nice ring to it.
Zelda: *Throws a pillow at him* Oh shut up you!
G!Link: You could always try convincing the other forest guy with the dog again.
Zelda: 🥲
-🦆
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AJFKSLJEIWOAJGKDLSAIHEOWTJFDKSAJFDLSAGKHDAS LINK'S THE GOAT I AM WHEEZING
"Link, The Goat of Legend has a nice ring to it" JFIWOAJTEKWAJFDSIOAJF I LOVE GERUDO LINK'S SASS
This is amazing XD XD XD Exactly the kind of chaos I'm looking for with these gremlins
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Toss a coin- disclaimer and character info
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-I don't own anything but the oc [sadly T-T]
-Don't own anyone mentioned, I only own Guinevere (yes, she will be the sister of the Legendary Geralt of Rivia. This is a crossover after all)
-Will have some, not all, Dsmp events. So Ranboo, Tubbo, and Tommy will all be kids of young age like 10 years old which is the main plot change so everyone else will be their normal age but them and didn't participate in any wars and such because of it. This is also sbi family au, you know the drill.
-This is for to honor Technoblade, Rest in Peace dear legend. This is also entrainment purposes.
-No sexual content (may allude to sexual stuff however and there may be sexual jokes)
-16+
-Strong Language
-Cringy and corny = [onto Guinevere]
-
Name: Guinevere
Title: Guinevere of Rivia/Gwen
Species: Witcher
Hair color: Milk-white
Eye color: Golden/Amber
Age: 100+ (physically 20 years old)
Status: Alive (immortal)
Gender: Female (she/her pronouns)
Height: 6'2 (Techno will be 6'6)
Measurements: Bust 94 cm Waist 52 cm Hip 90cm Bra Size 46E Cup
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[Appearance]
Guinevere is a beautiful young woman with a slender yet curvaceous physique, a big bust standing at around 6 feet 2 inches tall. She looks a lot like her dear brother Geralt of Rivia, she has long, milk-white hair which she wears in either a bun or ponytail her bangs fall around and frame her face. She has a scar on her jaw and the other under her eye, resting from the top to her cheekbone to a few inches above her jawline. She has beautiful golden/amber glowing eyes. She also wears a Wolf medallion around her neck.
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[This is what she looks like. Yes this if a female Geralt from the Witcher but that's besides the point. I don't own this]
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Personality: Most of the time, she can be apathetic, cynical, and threatening. Despite her outwardly cold nature, Techno noted that behind her exterior was hiding a fiercely loyal friend, and a woman of good humor and as someone not indifferent to suffering. Guinevere has many good friends such as, Techno, Philza, and __________ and _______ (you'll find out who they are later). She is also very protective of and loyal to her friends and companions and is willing to go to great lengths for those who mattered to her. She can be kind-hearted and caring to the people she loves.
Guinevere has also shown to be extremely adept at allaying intense, and at times bleak, situations and as a woman who would much sooner have everyone return home than draw their swords. Her lifespan made her a world-weary woman, often expressing disdain and circuitous insults to those she considered cruel, foolish, etc. She may have risked L'Manberg future to save Technoblade from the Butcher Army.
Guinevere frequently shows remorse and has revelations in her life. Other times she's had complete emotional breakdowns, even giving up being a witcher in general and dropping her morals at one point, but she prevailed and kept her life as a monster hunting witcher.
Guinevere is also known for her shape tongue and quick wittiness. Once she is insulted, she will insult back but 100x more effective. You can't out-sass the sass-master. You can't outwit her either. Guinevere is also very clever and sly.
Guinevere is shown to be tough and brave, but Techno always mentions she has a charm-like aura with a gentle voice. Guinevere is a rational person and often thinks head over heart.
Guinevere's humor goes to other great lengths, her most iconic trait is her consistent deadpan face and manner of speech regardless of her emotional state. She's rather stoic and will often voice whatever she has on her mind with a calm demeanor. Guinevere is a socially isolated and has a calm and emotionless demeanor and speaks only when she really needs to convey her thoughts. Her manner of speaking often makes people misinterpret what she means. Despite her detached nature, Guinevere harbors a strong ambition to hurt those who've her either her or those she cares for. Guinevere is also not afraid to show her more playful and lecherous side and will often make blunt and straightforward lewd remarks to some of the guys she interacts with such as Technoblade and at times her brothers (the other Witcher's minus Geralt) who does the same towards her. However, these comments are mostly jokes she directs at others, and are by no means ill-intended.
All in all, Guinevere's personality can be summarized as being incredibly selfless, kind and helpful, but also very snarky. She's often blunt, cold, harsh, honest and straightforward with everyone, and She is quick-witted, with a sarcastic streak, yet has an immensely good heart, and has a taste for blood and fighting.
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ohmyquiznacks · 6 years
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low quality doodles of some high quality space bois
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serenity-songbird · 2 years
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RULES:
(Requests are now Closed...)
So within my first two days I have gotten so many requests and I realized how much I love answering them. So, I have decided to spread my horizon. I will do requests fooor:
Acception (Webtoon)
Avengers
Avatar: The Last Airbender
Be More Chill
Brass and Sass (Webtoon)
Danny Phantom
Demon Slayer
Down To Earth (Webtoon)
Ducktales
Game of Thrones
Garten of Ban Ban
Hetalia
Hogwarts Legacy
Homestuck
Is It Wrong To Pick Up Girls In A Dungeon?
Jujutsu Kaisen
Kingdom Hearts
Komi Can't Communicate
Legend of Korra
Let's Play (Webtoon)
Lore Olympus (Webtoon)
Mage and Demon Queen (Webtoon)
Miraculous Ladybug
My Hero Acadamia
My Little Pony
Muted (Webtoon)
Mystic Messenger
Naruto
New Girl
Peaky Blinders
Poppy Playtime
Rising Of The Shield Hero
Seven Deadly Sins
Soul Eater
South Park
Spy X Family
Steven Universe
Stranger Things
Teen Titans
The Disastrous Life of Saiki K.
Undertale
Voltron: Legendary Defender
Welcome Home: The Puppet Show
The Witch and the Bull (Webtoon)
Young Justice
-I will do headcanons, one shots, and scenarios.
-I will no longer do NSFW. The previous works will still be available, but any new requests will be deleted.
-I honestly do not do Yandere. (I personally dealt with one in a previous relationship and it will trigger bad memories). I'm sorry I wont do it.
-No more than 4 characters at a time.
-I am very open-minded and I believe in Love is Love. Any character you can come up with I will do.
-I'm also open to draw, buuut I'm not exactly a great drawer so it will take some time and may or may not look exactly like you wanted. (Don't say I didn't warn you).
Those are my rules. Thank you for reading and requesting. Have a wonderful day!!! 😊😊😊
~Master List Link~
NOTE: I will do characters not the list as well. I just inputted the names at the top of my head.
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elliemmarrs · 7 years
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How did I just now think of this...
If Keith and Lance actually get together in the show I want Pidge to say “I’m just surprised it took this long.”
The same thing she said when Hunk threw up in the blue lion!
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chaiscentedcandle · 3 years
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Triwizard Tournament (part 1/2)
𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: George Weasley x fem!reader (reader is implied Gryffindor house)
𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: the reader, along with Harry, gets picked for the Triwizard Tournament and has to save George during the second task!
𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭: yes/no
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: none, I think maybe curse words?
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3,839
𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: so, I started from the “beginning” and it’s getting long so I decided to make this into two parts!
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The train cart rattled as it rode along the tracks, the twins including Lee chattering about something. The newspaper Y/n was reading would sometimes make noise occasionally when the cart shook, she was reading about the attack at the Quidditch World Cup, she had been their with the Weasley family, same with Harry and Hermione. It was a blur but what she distinctly remembers is running the wrong direction and coming face to face with a group of people wearing all black, their faces covered by gold skeleton masks and their hats were very pointy.
They had no business with her so they let her take off in the other direction, luckily she ran into the back of Fred. Turning around the Twins faces folded with relief as they didn’t have to worry about you and Ginny.
From the distance you could hear the trolley lady, her voice stretching far. Her slightly squeaky wheels bouncing off the walls, soon enough she was stood in front of their cart “anything from the trolley, dears?” She asked like always. Giving a quick glance up, Y/n reached into her pocket and pulled out a little pouch filled with galleons and some sickles, tossing it to Lee and hitting him square in the chest “get yourself’s something, I’m not hungry” she stated, George asked a weary “are you sure?” Before they crowded the opening. Enough money in the pouch to buy them each a thing or two.
“Are you done reading the bloody paper? It’s almost like you’ve been giving it bedroom eyes since you first saw it!” George said, a piece of sweets falling from his mouth to his trousers before he picked it up and but it back in his mouth. Sparing another short glance, Y/n responded “don’t talk with your mouth full, and no I have not, I’ve just decided to read the news for once” a bit of sass laced in her words.
“I agree with George, you haven’t taken your eyes off it, there’s not much in the paper about it” Lee added, and if Lee added Fred wanted to add too “yeah, I mean why read about it when you lived it?” He had a point, doesn’t mean it was a good one.
Y/n just rolled her eyes, Fred wasn’t done talking yet, as always “I mean think about it, it’s probably one measly paragraph or two, it’s a brief topic, why read that when you were in front of a actual death eater!” He said rather loudly with too much enthusiasm.
“You try seeing a death eater Fred, I’m pretty sure you’d wet yourself, plus it wasn’t a long encounter and I didn’t want it to be” George and Lee let out a few chuckles when Y/n said Fred would wet himself. They don’t know if it’d be true, but it was funny.
Lee whistled, catching George’s attention and tossed Y/n’s pouch to George who caught it mid air, beater skills. George placed it in her lap “there’s a few galleons left, Lee wasn’t too hungry either” finally Y/n fully took her eyes off her newspaper, setting it besides her, grabbing her little pouch she picked up her bag and stuffed it in, as she was distracted George took his opportunity to snatch the newspaper from her side.
Upon hearing the crumble of paper and seeing her newspaper gone, Y/n reached to take it from George, who only held it high “come on, George, give it back” Y/n told him, instead he stood up and held it above his head, Y/n followed ahead and tried to reach for her paper, alas she was too short. “George, give it back” she said sternly, he shook his head “no, you keep reading the damn paper over and over again, you’ve probably memorized every word by now, what good is coming out of it?” He asked, Y/n just glared up at him while George smiled a goofy smile at her. Planting her feet and putting her hands on her hips, Y/n was ready to tackle George, true it was just a piece of paper and it was a brief topic but she bought it with her own money “what do I have to do for you to give me back my bloody paper” jokingly George tapped his cheek with his free hand and bent his knees a little.
Y/n stood on her toes and gave him a quick peck on the cheek, George was stunned as he thought she would’ve given up, but when he froze Y/n took her chance and snatched the paper out of George’s hand, folding it up.
Everybody had gathered in the courtyard to see the foreign visitors. Y/n being squashed between the twins tall figures.
Hagrid stood down below with two giant paddles in his hands to direct the pegasus pulling a carriage in the air, it seemed to be going well until Hagrid turned his back and turned back around at the perfect second to doge the carriage. Some people let out gasps while others laughed or said “woooah”
“Well! There’s something you don’t see everyday!” Fred said, George responded with a laugh. Then Y/n spotted just the crows nest of a ship sticking out, pointing and leaning her body out a little she said “look! That’s the crows nest of a ship” George grabbed her hips “woah there! We don’t need you falling out” a hot flash of blush spread across her cheeks, as if on cue the tip of a ship shot out and fell forwards to reveal a whole ship. Another course of “woah” was let out, McGonagall walked out to the courtyard and called to the students “please go to your houses and get dressed in your robes, meet back in the great hall, we have an announcement to make!” With that she turned away and made her way back inside.
It wasn’t long before students began to fill the great hall, a few stragglers here and there. Y/n sat In front of George and Fred, next to Angelina, Neville sat across Y/n. They gave each other warm smiles.
Everyone watched the first years being sorted, Gryffindor gaining a few.
Dumbledore made his way to the stand, quieting the Great Hall. “Well now we’re all settled in and sorted, I’d like to make an announcement” just after saying this the Great Hall door opened and in running came Mr.Filch, Dumbledore continued “this castle will not only be your home this year, but home to some very special guests as well” Most of the students had their eyes on Mr.Filch as his heavy breathing echoed even though it wasn’t quiet. “You see, Hogwarts had been chosen-” Mr.Filch finally made it to the front, interrupting Dumbledore, they whispered about something before Mr.Filch took off running again, Dumbledore resumed “so, Hogwarts has been chosen to host a LEGENDARY event” he paused “The Triwizard Tournament!” People whispered among themselves for a bit, the twins whispering “brilliant” between themselves.
“Now for those of you who do not know, the Triwizard Tournament brings together three schools for a series of magical contests, from each school a single student is selected to compete, now let me be clear” his tone turned to serious “if chosen, you stand alone and trust me when I say these contests aren’t for the faint hearted” then his tone changed back to happy “but more of that later, but now please join me in welcoming, the lovely lady’s of the Beuxbations Academy of Magic!” Just before he was about to finish the doors swing open “and their headmistress, Madam Maxine!” Beautiful, fancy women decked in blue walk into the Great Hall, their hands behind their backs, all proper. They walked before they stopped a let out a sigh, leaning to the right and putting out their hand, they walked again and repeated the same thing before speeding up to the front, most of the boys staring at their bums.
Y/n looked up at George to see him staring as well, she smacks him on the arm and give hims a look, he turns to her with a look of confusion “what?” He asked before turning back around.
Everyone was watching as Madam Maxine made her way through, down the table a bit you could hear Seamus Finnagin say “blimey! That’s one biiig women!” A little girl was in a different outfit and doing flips, along side her another, older, girl who looks similar to her. They get to the front and bow, most boys (and some girls) clap, stand, cheer or all three for the lady’s. George and Fred being one of those boys, Y/n and Angelina give each other a look, Y/n let’s out a “hmpf” and lean her head on her hand, a pout upon her face, George noticed and asked “what’s wrong?” Getting no response she just turns her head away from him, leaning over to look at Angelina, she just gives him a straight smile and raises her eyebrows before also turning away.
Dumbledore put his hands up to silence everyone. “And now our friends from the North! Please greet the proud sons of Durmstrang! And their high master Igor Karkaroff!” Y/n faces twisted a little, Angelia nudged her “what is it?” She whispered “Igor Karkaroff served you-know-who in the Wizarding War” she whispered back, Angelinas face began to twist as well. Just then a loud bang came from the front, well fit men walked with staffs, banging them on the ground and chanting, sparks coming from the bottom. They spun and twisted the staffs before some of them abandoned them and made a sprint for the front, some lady’s letting out a gasp and standing to get a better look. Y/n and Angelina begin apart of that, Y/n caught a look at George and it seemed he wasn’t enjoying it too much.
Soon legendary Bulgarian seeker, Viktor Krum and Igor Karkaroff entered, people began to whisper “look!” “It’s krum!” Y/n turned to Angelina, a small smile on her face “I have to admit he’s quite cute!” Angelina let out a laugh, George elbowed her. She turned to George with the same look he gave her “what?!” She gave a little more sass, Neville let out a giggle. She went back to looking at Krum till he caught her eye, giving a wink then looking straight ahead. Heat coated her cheeks, Y/n gushed to Angelina “did you see that?” Angelina and Y/n freaked out amongst themselves for a little.
George rolled his eyes “personally I don’t think Viktor is all that great” he said to Fred who only laughed at his brother.
Everyone began to talk, chatter filling up the Great Hall or eyeing some of the food in front of them, some people paying attention to people brining in a big gold structure. Dumbledore stood next to it “your attention please!” The crowd went silent “I’d like to say a few words” he placed his hand on the gold structure “eternal glory! That is what awaits the student who wins the Triwizard Tournament, but to do this that student must survive three tasks, three EXTREMLY dangerous tasks” Y/n could feel her heart begin to race but she didn’t know why, George looked excited while Fred looked smug “wicked” they both said. “For this reason the ministry has seen fit to impose a new rule, to explain all this we have the head of the department of international magical corporation, Mr. Bartimus Crouch” the ceiling begin to rain and a lighting storm, a pretty bad one at that.
Some students began to scream before a red bolt in the corner up at the teachers table was sent out and it was back to normal. A wet, crazy looking man was putting his wand away. “It’s him” Ron said “Mad-Eye Moody” his voice low “Alastor Moody” Y/n said “the auror?” Hermione asked “auror?” Dean Thomas questioned “EX-auror, dark wizard catcher” Y/n said “filled up half of the cells in Azkaban thanks to him” Ron finished “he’s suppose to be mad as a hatter these days”.
The students watched the exchange between Mad-Eye Moody and Dumbledore. The minister Bartimus Crouch began speaking, his arms out and playing with his fingers as he spoke “after due consideration, The Ministry has concluded that for their own safety, no student under the age of seventeen should be allowed to put forth their name for the Triwizard Tournament” Mr. Crouch began to raise his voice as students started to get rowdy and yell “this decision is final!” Students started to get louder and louder, making Mr. Crouch having to speak louder. George and Fred got angry, screaming “that’s rubbish” and booing.
“You don’t know what your doing!!” George yelled, Y/n slapped his arm again “George! Be civil!” She told him, he ignored her.
Students still screamed and protested until Dumbledore screamed “SILEEEENCE!” There was still some murmuring before everyone stopped talking. Dumbledore raised his wand and lowered it, as he did the gold stand began to disappear and a big golden cup appeared, a small blue flame appeared above it which turned to a bigger blue flame. “The Goblet of Fire” Dumbledores voice rang throughout “anyone wishes to submit themselves to the tournament nearly write their name upon a piece of parchment and throw it in the flame before this hour on Thursday night” he paused “do not do so lightly! If chosen, there’s no turning back, as from this moment the Triwizard Tournament has begun” Dumbledore finished.
Y/n could hear the roaring of the fire, it was loud in her ears, her heart beat faster then a pixies wings when it’s was flying. All throughout dinner her hands where shaking, Neville was the first to notice.
“You alright, Y/n?” She casted her eyes up to him, shaking her head “no” and that was the last thing she said for the rest of dinner.
For Y/n it was a short time before it was Wednesday, the day before the picking of the champions, a couple of people including her sat in the room with the Goblet, a blue hue throughout the room. She stared at the cup, as if it would tell her all its secrets, a anxious feeling sitting in her stomach. Hermione sat below Y/n, she was calling her name but Y/n didn’t notice until Hermione was shaking her knee “you alright? You’ve been staring at the cup for a couple of minutes” Y/n blinked a few times before she shrugged her shoulders “I’m scared, I feel like something terrible is going to happen, but it’s hard to explain” just then George and Fred came running in, yelling and laughing, a vial in each of their hands.
“Well lads! We’ve done it!” George said to the few people in front of them “cooked it up just this morning!” Fred added, Hermione turned away from them “it’s not going to work” she sang, George and Fred gave each other a look before each twin was on either side of her.
“Oh yeah?” Said Fred “And why is that Granger?” George asked. Hermione huffed “you see this?” She said sassily and motioned to the blue line around the cup “this is a aging line, Dumbledore drew it himself” she told them “so?” Fred responded, Hermione scoffed “SO, a genius like Dumbledore couldn’t possibly be fooled by a dodge as pathetically dimwitted as an Aging Potion!”
“Oh but that’s why it’s so brilliant” told Fred
“Because it’s so pathetically dim witted!” Finished George.
“Ready, Fred?”
“Ready, George!”
They locked arms and said “bottoms up!” Both downing the potion before jumping inside the line, nothing happened. Some students cheered and the twins let out a victorious “yeah!” With a little pep in their step they placed their names in the goblet, letting out a another “yeah!” And high-fiving, unfortunately for them the cup went crazy and flung them out of the ring, landing hard in the ground.
Y/n let out a gasp as she stood up, as the twins sat up they both sported long grey hairs and breads to match “you said!” Said Fred “you said!” George repeated, then they began to brawl, rolling and tackling on the ground, everyone cheering.
“Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!” It started to die out.
Viktor Krum and Karkaroff entered the room, all eyes on them. Viktor entered the ring and placed a piece of parchment in, undoubtedly his name, as he was leaving he eyed Y/n and Hermione. This wasn’t unnoticed by George, who was still an old man, and his noticeable anger didn’t go unnoticed by his brother.
Thursday. Finally the name drawing of the three champions. Y/n hands wouldn’t stop shaking, her and Neville made their way to the Great Hall “are you okay, Y/n? You’re shaking like you’re freezing cold” he asked, she shook her head “I don’t know why, but I’m so scared, I’m getting terrible anxiety” she told him, he rubbed her back and pulled her to his side “you’ll be alright, you’re underage, you can’t get picked” she nodded her head, he was right, of course he was right, she’s only sixteen, shes too young. Neville held her hand to reduce her shaking, it helping somewhat.
Everyone stood in anticipation, eager to see who’d been picked. Y/n never took her eyes off the goblet, not until George nudged her “you okay?” He asked, she shook her head again “no, why does everyone keep asking me that? Don’t I visibly not look okay?” She said a little annoyed, George raised his hands in defense. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into his side, just like Neville.
Soon the staff and Dumbledore entered. “Sit down! Please” he said. Hurriedly everyone took their seats, Y/n sitting next to George with Fred next to her. “Now the moment you’ve all been waiting for!” He paused to build tension “the champion selection!” Quickly Dumbledore turned around, his arm raised as he dimed the fire around the room.
Y/n heart started to beat faster, she wrapped her arm around George’s and curled into him, turning to her he gave her a kiss on the top of her head to calm her. Dumbledore made his way over to the goblet, same hand raised. Once he reached the goblet he set both hands on it for a few seconds then took it off and backed away, the flame turned bright red and he shield his eyes from the brightness, a piece of parchment flew out from the cup, catching it Dumbledore turned it over and read the name. “The Durmstrang champion is....Viktor Krum!” Cheers rang throughout Durmstrang and Viktor mumbled a happy “yes!” fist bumping the air, getting pats on the shoulder he stood up, shaking hands with Dumbledore and moving to the front.
Next was Beauxbatons, Dumbledore turned the fancy blue paper over “the champion for Beauxbations is..Fleur Delacour!” The Beauxbations women cheered and clapped for her, not as loud as Durmstrang, Ron eyed Fleur. Gross.
Next was Hogwarts. “The Hogwarts champion” Dumbledore turned the parchment over “Cedric Diggory!” Hogwarts cheered for Cedric, his friends cheered louder. Y/n let out a sign of relief, maybe she was just overthinking, Neville placed his hand in her shoulder “see! I told you you’d be alright” she gave him a smile to which he returned.
“EXCELLENT!” Dumbledores voice reached throughout the whole room “we now have our three champions!” Y/n could feel the pit in her stomach grow small, but it was still there “but only one will go down in history” Dumbledore continued “only one! Will hoist this Chalice of Champions!” Bartimus Crouch brought in something big, covered in a piece of fabric, he placed it on a stand “this vessel of victory! The Triwizard Cup!” Dumbledore turned around and pointed at the cup, the piece of fabric flew off and relieved a big blue glowing cup. Students began to clap and cheer for the cup.
Snape started to eye the goblet weirdly, the students near the entrance saw the goblet begin to go crazy like when George and Fred tried to put their names in. Dumbledore turned around quickly, the clapping stopped and he made his way to the goblet, it began to grow red like before when the names flew out. The red fire shot up and another piece of parchment flew out, grabbing it Dumbledore turned it quickly to find a name. “Harry Potter...” he mumbled, looking up hastily around the room he repeated once more “Harry Potter?” Students started to look around the room for Harry, Harry sat back down, not wanting to go up or be seen. Hagrid was shaking his head and mumbling “no...no”. Dumbledore grew angry “HARRY POTTER!” He yelled. Y/n could feel the pit in her stomach begin to grow again. Hermione grabbed Harry’s shoulder “come on, Harry” he didn’t move, she grabbed his shoulder and tried to move him “Harry for goodness sake” she said. Harry stood, Hermione shoved him lightly a few times, Ron had a very sour look on his face, Harry made his way to Dumbledore, who didn’t look so please and only shoved the parchment with his name to him, hesitantly taking it Harry made is way to the front, students protested. They were getting angry “he’s a cheat!” Someone shouted “he’s not even seventeen yet!” Someone else said.
Neville tapped Y/n on the shoulder “do you think that’s what you could’ve been feeling?” She shrugged “I don’t know, maybe” she looked back up at the front, only for the goblet start to go wild again, Dumbledore covered his eyes but that couldn’t stop his face from getting more angry. Just like Harry, another parchment flew out, angry enough, Dumbledore snatched it from the air, turning it over to read the other name “Y/n L/n?” He called quite loud. Y/n stomach sank, this is what she had been feeling. Just like Harry, she froze, somehow Dumbledore had found where she was sitting and his face showed he didn’t want to go through with this again. “Y/n come on, don’t make him wait” Neville whispered to her, with wobbly knees she slowly stood up, her hands violently shaking. George stood up too, blocking her from moving “George, what are you doing?” She asked, he just stared down at her, Y/n pulled him in for a hug, something they both needed in the moment. They pulled away and she made her way to Dumbledore, who also pushed the parchment her way but with a little more force, he was more than just angry. Students started to get angry again, two students had been chosen for the tournament who were underage, it was a champion for THREE people but somehow there’s five champions, it was an outrage.
Y/n followed where Harry went, he was technically the only other champion she knew. Following him, he leaned in, nervous as well “doesn’t feel great, does it?” He said, she wiped her sweaty hands on her skirt “no, no it doesn’t”.
Tags!: @the-romanian-is-bae @deadpoolgirl23
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kunoichi-ume · 2 years
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WIP Whenever
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@cinlat and @starknstarwars​ both tagged me in this recently, thanks! I haven’t been doing much writing lately (or this year really, its been a rough one and writer’s block is a pain). I have been editing and doing small rewriting of the next chapter of Behind the Trigger, my companion fic to Cinlat’s Heart on a Trigger because it’s easier to play in her story instead of writing my own haha. 
I’ve rewritten a lot of this piece but this part, that I know I’ve shared with Cinlat is still my favorite part of this piece. This particular scene is actually the one that started this whole idea and while I’ve only posted about 8k words of it I have actually written close to 30k in this story.... so yeah. Here’s a little bit of it when Noara is working on reestablishing her connection to the Force after joining the Alliance. Blocking it off for a few years out of fear gave her some unexpected issues to work out. 
"That is a highly advanced skill. Might I suggest a smaller task first? Then you may work your way up."
"What do you suggest, Master? I am pretty good at throwing things, it is the more controlled actions I struggle with." Noara could feel her face flushing in embarrassment admitting that to a Jedi of Master Carlo’s calibur. The mystical side of the Force had never been her strong suit but Master Carlo’s expertise was legendary.
Waving her hand to the side, several fist sized rocks floated toward Notiac and landed on the ground between the two Jedi. "Simply put, this is my suggestion. Collect rocks and arrange them in an inverted pyramid." As the Master spoke, the rocks lifted into the air and arranged themselves into a perfect pyramid, upside down and floating several inches off the ground.
Leaning forward, Noara examined the structure of the figure. It sounded simple, but she could already imagine the strain on her concentration this would take. "And when this is practiced and done with ease?” 
"Get heavier rocks."
Noara sat back up and looked at the Master incredulously. "That's it?"
The woman nodded serenely. "Your body weighs more than the rocks; how do you expect to lift it when you cannot consistently do this?"
Noara eyed the Master and the floating rocks for a long moment before sighing. "Why do I get the feeling this is like that test on Tython? Where you levitate the rock with nothing under it because the real test was with yourself?"
Notiac smiled. "Because all of life's real tests are against yourself."
She didn’t openly roll her eyes, but Noara had a feeling the Jedi could sense the sentiment coming off of her. Especially when the woman frowned in her direction. While 
Noara expected a reprimand for her sass, something Master Doran had often gifted her with what the Jedi said instead surprised her.
“Where is your lightsaber Noara?” 
The question was asked in a soft, comforting voice but it still felt like being struck. Noara clenched her fists to distract herself with the bite of her nails into her palms before she let slip just how much the question hurt. “I lost them,” she confessed, looking down at her lap in shame. A lightsaber was more than just a weapon to a Jedi, it was part of their rite of passage. The last thing an Padawan did before being bestowed the title of Knight was being allowed to craft their own lightsaber. Noara’s eyes burned and she blinked back the tears threatening to fall. She would not cry in front of another Jedi. In front of anyone.
So absorbed in trying to rein in her emotions, Noara didn’t notice Notaic leaning toward her until a soft, warm hand landed on one of her clenched fists. 
“Don’t despair Noara,” Notaic said, squeezing her hand comfortingly. “No material item dictates your worth, not even a lightsaber.”
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chocolateslatte · 4 years
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🚨The Rise of Skywalker Detailed Review and Spoilers Ahead🚨
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George Lucas: “If the boy and girl walk off into the sunset hand-in-hand in the last scene, it adds 10 million to the box office”
The “fairytale” we got: A long long time ago in a galaxy far far away, there was a curse of pain and death in a family that just went on and on.  They were never able to break it and they all die, the end. 
Well, you did it JJ, you little punk...you ruined 40 years of cinema. Kids are coming out of theatres crying, they can’t understand. I guess this was the “fun and hopeful ending” you were speaking of during the press tours.  Are you on crack or something, or just sadistic....why would you promote it like that!? Did you forget Star Wars at its core is a story of hope, light, a fairytale in space for children? They did it...they united Reylo’s and Fanboys through hate. 
JJ you do realize tragical romances are only tragically romantic if there was romantic buildup? Romeo and Juliet married in secret, Anidala did as well and flirted in the fields. How was this supposed to be satisfying? A five-second beginning, middle, and end. How this went through multiple execs is beyond me.... I would have understood if Reylo was Rian’s creation. BUT JJ LITERALLY was the one who told Rian to go forth with it...he created Reylo so you can’t say the last Jedi derailed things on that front. JJ wasn’t brave enough for his own vision. This movie was like “the crimes of Grindlewald”, a lot of stuff happening that made me feel nothing. 
Okay, first things first. The OG trilogy was necessary, the prequels were necessary to set up that Vader did not start off bad. What was necessary about the sequels? They just dismantled everything the Skywalker family worked for. Why did we have to see ALL of our favorite characters die? Was the aim that a villain can only be redeemed through death? How original. I’m convinced what they were planning for since force awakens was a journey from villain to hero...but instead we got this a 10min redemption resulting in death a la Vader. Why call Adam Driver’s character a “Disney Prince”?When did Happy endings become so controversial? We go to the movies to feel hope, to escape reality...George Lucas understood that. JJ’s trilogy is uninspired, bland and contributes nothing to the saga. JJ went as far as to recon his own “The Force Awakens”.It had the chance to define generations but no. Literal and utter garbage. Rian made some odd choices but he was bold, unafraid and had the vision. HE knew emotion was at the heart of Star Wars.
WHERE DID THE SKYWALKERS RISE? MORE LIKE RISE OF PALPATINE,  HE BLOODY WON
BUT my problem is not with the ending, it’s the bloody entire movie. This movie made me realize that it's not Reylo that I am a fan of, it was Ben, Leia, Han, Ani, Padme, and all those other characters. I’m upset because this movie is not my Star Wars: of family, love and above all else hope. This is just a 2.5-hour video game with no emotions. This trilogy was all angst with NO payoff.
Okay, you will never ever convince me Palpatine was planned the whole time. This whole movie was retcon for the Last Jedi that pissed off the fanboys. Lucas films did not have an outline for the three films and Rian derailed whatever they wanted to do....except they didn’t even tell him what they wanted! This should be a cautionary tale of why you need to plan. Kylo ain’t bad, Snoke is gone....well pull out Palpatine I guess. This whole film is JJ’s mad scrambling.  Alright, I will humor you, tell me how Palpatine came back when he fell down a shaft and exploded....not *boom boom because of force*. The force in this movie is not canon George Lucas force, it’s just an easy out whenever JJ wants one. 
1. Opening Crawl: As soon as I saw this I knew all the leaks were true, I wanted to bolt from the theatre. When I saw them in August I laughed cause it was so ridiculous it couldn’t be true. How could Disney let a whole movie leak? The plot seemed like a bad fan-fiction. Actually, fanfics are way more true to lore. Anyway, so Palpatine “announces” that he’s back. Is this the shrewd Chancellor Palpatine we know? Certainly, not...why in the world would he announce it rather than keep on the DL and just attack. Yo Palps ain’t this dumb why would you let them (the resistance) prepare?? Because of plot...well okay. 
2. Did Last Jedi even happen:  this film is the sequel to the force awakens, like TLJ never happened...except it’s acting like there was some movie in between that JJ made. Okay, so why is Kylo trying to run Rey over with his tie fighter...he doesn’t really want to kill her. It’s just meaningless action shots.  And don’t get me started on exposition, the dialogue: “hey look its the Knights of Ren”. Except they do nothing. Cool cool.  Kylo’s character goes back to Force awakens era like no development had occurred...except he’s not even there he’s just messing around not even being a real villain.  JJ’s specialty is set-up and he does this beautifully....but he can not wrap up and follow through. 
3. Rose Tico: yup last Jedi never happened, she has nothing to do. She and Finn are irrelevant. Finn has reverted to being obsessed with Rey. Cool Cool.  I honestly feel so bad for the lovely Kelly Marie Tran. How did you relegate a relatively big character into the sidelines?? Why introduce two new characters this late. Rose could have filmed in for them...but alas we must snub Rian at every turn because that’s just how petty JJ Abrams is. ( don’t get me wrong Jannah was cool)
4. The Rise Of Poe Dameron: Finn has been relegated to a side character who does nothing and just yells “REY!”. It was a great setup, a stormtrooper who was force sensitive but doesn’t want his life to be fighting for nothing. You could have explored trauma, the discovery of the light but nope nada. Tell me the point of his character journey. So flat and static. And with Jannah and the ex stormtroopers they could have gone with the arc of these lost, sad kids coming together to find family. 
5. Leia:  Okay you’re telling me our Princess would give up on her son before he was born, just throw away her lightsaber and accept Ben’s fate? Cool alright. And she knew about Rey Palpatine and didn’t say anything...my princess would never.
6. Mary Sue Rey: Ahh Rey this girl feels no emotion in this movie...just like the audience. Sure she’s trained but she can just do stuff with the “force” that even Jedi masters can’t. Stopping a whole starship, something even Yoda could barely do...yup she can do it. Beat Kylo all the time except one, yup she can. Manipulate the force in mind-boggling ways, heal people...sure Luke couldn’t but Rey certainly can.  Cause she is the chosen one...hell even Ani wasn’t this talented and he had years of training. Poe and Finn have a genuine connection, Rey just seems disjointed (totally understandable why)...but if so the ending is even worse. She doesn’t even find peace with her friends. She’s not realistic and human like Luke and Leia were. 
 Force sensitivity in the galaxy:  What a perfect setup, the boy with the broom at the end of TLJ that was force sensitive. The message is that the power to use the force was spreading through the galaxy. No longer confined to the elite. People were hearing of Luke’s battle of Crate and rising.
7. Kylo/Ben: I still maintain that he, other than Ani was the most nuanced character in the whole saga. His arc from Force Awakens to Last Jedi had progressed. How great that even someone from the legendary line of skywalker and solo could fall to the dark again. He wasn’t flat, he was a tortured boy that was conflicted since the first movie. How great would it have been to see him as a conflicted supreme leader, which was set up in TLJ. But *gasps* a plot of his very own, no can do, this is the nature of JJ’s crush on Rey and Daisy. 
Disney released comics that made us sympathize with him, to see that all along he was manipulated by Snoke, and Palpatine the voices in his head. Neglected by those who were supposed to love him. Adam Driver was cast perfectly, he had almost no lines that weren’t related to Rey’s charcater arc. If he were a woman I’m sure everyone would be offended. That single line’s delivery “Dad-”
Come on Poe had more lines than him, and Driver according to JJ was half of the protagonist. He was pitched an arc opposite that of Darth Vader that’s why he signed. Man JJ really did do everyone dirty. 
8. Ben had no lines while redeemed other than “ow”...I am so sorry ADAM that this nasty ass JJ did this to you...this part was 100% improv by Adam, I am willing to bet my life on it. You know why “ow” was brilliant? Cause it meant he felt pain and emotion, he was no longer hiding behind the hardness of Kylo REN. Adam’s performance as Ben left me speechless, he was convincing as Kylo, intimidating...but as BEN he shines in the way only Solo’s can. The way his eyes become determined once he accepts he must give his life, and he does so happily for the love of his life. His soulmate. Star Wars and JJ never deserved the talent that is Adam Driver.
9. They are supposed to be equals in the force yet they missed the opportunity to fight Snoke together. Tell me how they are equals. He existed only to further Rey’s plotline. 
Oh and the other Jedi including Anakin whisper and help Rey...when his own grandson has been asking for help in distress for like 30years. Nice real nice.
10. Finally Reylo:  it felt unearned cause there was no buildup, JJ just threw it in for kicks forgetting all the P&P parallels he was shooting for. An afterthought. Driver and Ridley’s acting saved the day, they had no lines.  Adam Driver is truly one of the finest actors. You could see the difference between Ben and Kylo in his subtle gestures...the sass was pure Han Solo.  
11. And then the death: I wouldn’t even say we won, but at what cost. We won in no way. Had he died fighting I would have understood, but this death was so unnecessary and put in just for the fanboys. Let me say again I would have been okay with death had it been justified.  How is this any different than Vader x Luke. JJ can only copy not create. How crazy that you can just bring people back from the dead...Anakin is here like, am I joke to you? I could have brought Padme back say what???? What was the point of his whole fall to the dark. The force is infinite, that’s the whole point...once you know how to use it you can’t run out of it like juice. Oh, and Ben did not become one with Rey but rather the Force according to the Disney website. So why pray tell did he not appear as a force ghost? I’m convinced JJ was on crack.  
12. No Mourning BEN no acknowledgment:  5 seconds! And then she moves on from losing her soulmate, half of her soul. She loses it over Chewie but nothing, no emotion not even a second over her other half. Seriously? No one ever knows Ben came back...nada. JJ set up Reylo, time and time again he has said that he crafted the story around the romance. He was left scrambling after Last Jedi and this was a last-ditch shock ending. No Reylo theme song, no across the stars
13. Last Jedi told us you don’t have to come from a powerful family to be important. THE WHOLE thing was that you could be force-sensitive and be a nobody. Nobodies can become somebody. A Hero is not born but made. The force lives in all beings, not just powerful families. It inspired me, what a great message to young guys and gals. Kylo’s line, “you come from nothing, you are nothing...you have no place in this story” finally turns out true. You have to come from something to have a part in the Star Wars story. And Rey had darkness inside her cause she was human. Because none of us are pure, we are shades of grey. But no, it’s cause darkness only runs in families. In the Last Jedi when she wants to see her family all she sees is herself and a shadow (Ben) who joins with her. Please do explain this JJ. And if this granddaughter thing was set up I would have had no problem...but they pulled it from their asses. You can have nothing but mean something. But no pander to the fanboys. In the end, a Palpatine lived and all the skywalkers ended....and we are supposed to have hope. Palpatine really did win. 
14. Rey’s biggest fear was ending up in the desert alone, we were told “the belonging she seeks is ahead not behind” and “there’s someone who could still come back”. They mentioned she felt just as alone with the resistance. Only the other half of her soul understood her. This is truly tragic and sad...I am so heartbroken for her. And don’t tell me she isn’t there to stay...the soundtrack is called “a new home”. Enjoy the rest of your days being exactly where you started Rey....but hey at least you got a droid boo. I’m convinced this is not the balance JJ envisioned in the first movie. At one point in TFA Rey looks up sees an old woman alone, scavenging in the desert. This rattles her to the core and it starts her journey of wanting a better, different life. I am so sorry Rey. Okay so you may say she has the resistance and her friends...but let’s consult the last Jedi. In the end when everyone is on the ship...Rey is surrounded by friends yet looks more alone than ever. No one but Ben, maybe Luke, Leia, and Han understood her pull to the dark.
How sad that these two hopeless souls who had never known a moment of belonging and true love, found it for all but a few seconds.
I will quote: “preventing female characters with strong, compelling narratives from experiencing love, intimacy, and affection is just as regressive as reducing them down to sexual accessories. Assumes that women must choose between a romantic interest and depth of character”
Men really can not write good female characters, can they? A woman really can’t be a badass and end up with the love of her life
15. The Skywalker’s and Redemption: How truly truly sad that Han and Leia gave their life for their son who also died at a young age. ALL the Skywalkers and Solo’s have a tragic end. This is not what George Lucas wanted. What a tragic way to end this saga...they weren't able to break the curse. AND to all those troubled kids out there that lashed out and made terrible mistakes in their youth....doesn’t matter what you do dying is the only way out. You could have exiled him, made him pay in other ways. Nothing can be done to make up for your sins but death, no amount of good means that you can come home. To the young boys that get wrapped up in terror organizations, sorry the only way you can be redeemed is death...don’t bother changing and coming back. They could have exiled him, had him start an academy with Rey for Jedi kids. He could have spent the rest of his days redeeming himself. Why tell us he was literally preyed upon, haunted, and manipulated as a child. Even in a fantasy world, a victim of mental illness and abuse can not catch a break. Ben as a child could not fall asleep due to the demon-like voices in his mind. Everyone abandoned him in his time of need. Ben never desired power like Anakin, he went over to the dark because “the voice” of his grandfather promised belonging. I am shocked that this is the message Disney sends us. Oh and yeah you can totally take on the Skywalker name for kicks...the disrespect I swear
16. The worst bit is that I am 90% sure there was another ending that was scrapped.  There was a promo shot of Jannah in a field, soft lighting, lush planet. It was exactly like P&P. Daisy Ridley said the lasts scene was known to only Her, Jannah on that panel (Driver was away). Convinced Jannah was looking at Rey and Ben starting a new life away from the desert which she and Luke hate so much. Hence the production of “A New Home” soundtrack. Hence why the “Farewell” song played behind Reylo kiss was hopeful. Why Luke’s soundtrack when he became part of the force was not triumphant. Why the death scene was sudden and cut weird and no sorrow from Rey. CAUSE THEY SCRAPPED THE ORIGINAL ENDING LAST MINUTE.  Everyone knows JJ was still editing one month before. The concept art which was supposed to be released this month has been pushed to March. Why you ask? They need to remove the pages with a happy ending. He just didn’t have the guts, pandered to everyone and yet no one. He was successful in creating a beautifully filmed action-filled movie with none of the heart of Star Wars.
And then she goes and buries Anakin’s saber on freaking TATOOINE. He HATES Sand and Luke wanted to get away from there as soon as possible. Of course, a Palpatine would torture them that way. But nostalgia is the cash cow so. JJ can only generate nostalgia, not create original stories. IF he had any creativity she would have buried it at Padme’s grave.
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The fanboys say “leave the romance for the romance movies”....have you seen the original trilogy or the prequels? Star Wars has always had hope and romance entwined with it. 
SO AFTER 40 YEARS...PALPATINE WINS...HIS BLOODLINE LIVES ON
...and people thought the prequels were bad 
JJ you also said that your goal was for people to come out of the movie feeling more hopeful and happy then they went in...yet here I am. My roommate literally had to console me and buy me ice cream. I am just so numb. I am sure the casual fan will enjoy this, as seen from the rotten tomatoes ratings. I think the critics were too generous with this one, 
Star Wars is very simple at its core, Good vs Bad and Dark vs Light. The kids are expected to understand that a Palpatine being the only one who lives is hopeful? That is the conclusion of three generations of Skywalker sacrifice...
This is how the Skywalkers are remembered...In Tragedy and Curse??
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magicalfxgirl · 3 years
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LO Characters as Pokemon Trainers: The Nymphs
The Nymphs teams are based on LO, and their origins in greek mythology. Anything else is pure fanfiction. Please enjoy.
Daphne
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Her Bayleef, Bloom has been with her since birth as the two were born in the same field. The two are extremely close. Bloom has hated Apollo ever since she first met him. Literally attacking him with razor leaf and vine whip when the two first met. Apollo has avoided Bloom at all cost ever since. The pokemon Bayleef gets it named after bay leaves which are part of the laurel tree family. The tree which she turns into in the original myth. Her Bellossom, Bella was given to her as an Oddish by Persephone when both Persephone and Daphne were children. Persephone later gave Daphne a Sun Stone to evolve Bella from a Gloom into Bellossom. As Gloom smell bad and Persephone knew it would hurt Daphne to have to leave Bella behind when Daphne left to start her carrear. Bella is always seen dancing on Sprouts its sings. The two are close as they have been with Daphne the longest. Bella evolved from a Sun Stone that Persephone gave her. Bella spied on Daphne's and Apollo's date's in order to protect Daphne as Bloom could not. Bella has also appeared in some of Daphne's photoshoots. Her Frosmoth, Silk a gift from Thanatos as he is associated with moths or butterflys. Silk is often mistaken for a beautiful bow as she loves sit on Daphne's head. Pumpkin, her Pumpkaboo initially was in the care of Thanatos. Thanatos cared for Pumpkin, but feared people would think he was getting soft so he gave Pumpkin to Daphne. Although Echo thinks it was just so he had an excuse to visit Daphne. Her Finneon and Goldeen are a reference to orignal origins as a water nymph.
Echo
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Echo is ace is obviously Chatter, her Chatot who often repeats what is ever said around him. Daphne calls Chatter, Echo Jr or Echo's shadow as the two are never far a apart. Something useful as Chatter repeats Hera's commands in order for Echo not to miss a word her mistress speaks. Hera has mixed feelings toward Chatter as realizes he is useful, but he also never shut up. So she is on the fence about him. Her ditto, Daffodil, is a reference to Narcissis the man fell in love with, but was more in love with her own reflection. Her Vaporeon, Vapor can literally become one with water. Another reference to Narcissisus. Her Misdeavous, is known for mimicing people. Her Gogoat, Fauna and Pikapek, Reed were both gifts from the God, Pan, who loved her. She also has Audino, its just not on her team.
Aetna
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Aetna has only had 3 apparences so far, but her team will definetly leave an impact. Half her team is based on her appearence in LO, while the other half is base on her portray in Greek mythology.
Hephaetus gifted her Rotom, Virus and her Porygon Z, Update. As he was worried she was lonely being limited to the web. Technically Aetna recieved Update through trading a Hepheatus another Rotom, but that was just done so she would have a Porygon with better graphics. Charjabug makes sure the computers she uses stay powered even during blackouts. Her Octillery, Palikoi, is known for hitting enemies with blasts of hot water. He is named after the greek god of geysers and hot springs. Depending on the myth on Aetna is the mother or grandmother of Palikoi the greek god of geysers and hot springs. Stakataka, an Ultrabeast looks like a building come to life is reference to Mount Aetna which shares her name. According to greek mythology Zeus threw Mt. Aetna on top of father of monsters Typhoon. According to pokemon canon Ultrabeast are not legendary as there more than one of each as they come. Her Camerupt, Mountain is another reference to Mount Aetna.
Thetis
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When I said Zeus had a type well Thetis is the secound mistress of his that has a Malamar as her one of her Aces. Thetis is no where near Leto's level, but she is still a master manipulator. Manipulating both Zeus and Minthe. Her Malamar, Malice will do whatever it takes to get what it wants. Even framing Thetis' other pokemon in order to remain on top of Thetis' team. That being said it is still number two Thetis' true Ace, Yuki-Onna, the Frosglass. Its Moon dex entry explains its spot on Thetis' team "The soul of a woman lost on a snowy mountain possessed an icicle, becoming this Pokémon. The food it most relishes is the souls of men." Beautiful, yet vicious nature of Thetis's Yuki-Onna makes it easy to understand why the pokemon is her ace. Jaws, her Sharpedo, was a gift from her parents as Thetis is a water nymph who always had men after her. Her Leipard, Leila hates that it is third place in Thetis' team. It is well known that Thetis' Liepard considers Hera's Persian its rival. Something that Hera's Persian seems indifferent too which just makes Liepard angrier.Gossip, her Nickit often helps her steel Zeus' phone, when Thetis wants to hurt Hera.
Leila and Gossip happen to be friends. As Gossip will help steal food for Leila while Leila protects Gossip from getting attacked by Thetis' other pokemon. Her Huntail, Glow, was from a trade that went wrong. Zeus was susposed to trade her Clamperl with a Deep Sea Scale so she would have a Gorebyss. Instead it was holding a Deep Sea Tooth and evolved into a Huntail. Wierdly enough Jaws and Glow are close friends and help keep each other safe from the infighting within Thetis' team.
Minthe
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As master manipulator of men from Thanatos to Hades it makes sense her main ace would share the same skill. Salazzle rules over the male salandit and destroys any female who threaten her rain. Her Salazzle, Sass is just vicious as her trainer. Most people in Underworld corps think its fiting that one of Minthe's ace is Gorebyss. As it's pokedex entry states "Although Gorebyss is the very picture of elegance and beauty while swimming, it is also cruel. When it spots prey, this Pokémon inserts its thin mouth into the prey's body and drains the prey of its body fluids." Her Gorebyss, is named Siren. Ironically Siren was gift trade from Hades who traded to her a magickarp in order to make it evolve. Minthe literally drains the life of those around her be it Thanatos or Hades. She uses her beauty to bring them in before draining them completely. Her preference for poisin types continues with her Dragalge, and her Victreebel. Her Carnivine was gift from Thanatos who wanted to impress her. It did not work. Her Poliwag was gift from her family and her only connection to time as simple water nymph. It is also where Hades got his pet name, tadpole from as Poliwag is the tad pole pokemon.
Nymphs are done. Who is next, but the most feared beingings in LO, the Titans.
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a-tale-of-legends · 2 years
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Idea! The twins get the idea to ask N for help with communicating Eternatus, with potential extra complication if Eternatus did temporarily possess Leon.
N would be very confused when he talks to Eternatus and can get the gist of feelings but no clear message. They are not from Earth, after all, and spent the last millenia asleep / in stasis. Not many chances to learn the local language of the Pokemon.
Alternatively, Eternatus can speak telepathically and sounds like they have a British / Galarian accent, plus some English slang. XD From the ride in Leon's head.
Ooooh interesting! I wouldn't be surprised if N has been to Galar at some point in his journey, so he would definitely know where to meet the twins. Him not being able to understand Eternatus clearly is a good concept! Kinda puts a limit of how much he can really use his abilities.
He does get some feelings, like you said, but without a clear message it's hard to translate. Sadness, anger and loneliness are the main one he feels/ can be a decent gist, and N's old frustration with humanity is brought up again. It's one thing to defeat a wild pokemon- wild pokemon fight each other, and from his understanding, the circumstances were that Galar would possibly be destroyed if they hadn't called the Wolves. That he can understand and accept. What he cannot and will not accept is the fact is that a fucking business man capture a defenseless creature into your custody and force said creature wishing stars in this master plan of ' saving Galar' or some bullshit. At the very least with Maxie and Archie, they were ultimately unaware of the harm that would happen onto Hoenn and the legendaries. Rise knew what he was doing and Eternatus' anger soon becomes N. Fortunately the twins and Leon are their to remind him of the good in humanity- Leon wanting to befriend Eternatus and wanting to work together to get a better sense of their powers, even after being possessed ( which btw!!! Is a formula N never even thought of!!!! So he's pretty excited!!!!). A and E in general and N trusting them so much more than he used to( and of course seeing the good of humanity with his own eyes). So yeah. N would translate the vague feelings he's getting from Eternatus.
Now I'm not gonna sit here and pretend that I know British slang, but after possessing Leon, if Eternatus can speak telepathically, then that is a big yes. I like to imagine Eternatus, being so out of it, doesn't really have a filter, so they just go off most of the time. They are mindful of Leon's emotions, having literally know more than anyone else ( which is kinda a scary thought. A Pokemon that possessed you knows more about you than your friends and family. Quite possibly yourself), but also you can't tell me Eternatus wouldn't engage in some playful ribbing of the man. Both N and then would be having a field day with the sass and harmless gossip, much to the twins and Leon's dismay lol.
I hope these answers suffice! I'm not sure if I answered them well, haha.
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Season Three Pidge is FANTASTIC. 
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damnrightshow · 3 years
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13. Oct ’21 Damn Right Show ~Wednesday Relaxing Freestyle Funk Selection...
 Wednesday show is the flavor of laid back, relaxing 2 hours freestyle funk selection. 
Today's show is, I think freestyle Soul selection is fit for playing. 
35 tunes played with relaxing flavor. Please try it your own time schedule.
Please enjoy the show everybody.
Here is the playlist.
"Any Day Now" BEAU DOLLAR & THE COINS (Prime)
"Love One Another" RAW UMBER (Virginia)
"Make You Mine" PUZZLE PEOPLE (AMG)
"In The Daytime And Love You At Night" MASTERS OF SOUL (Duke)
"The Next World" LOVE FOR DOLLARS AND CENTS (Co-Co)
"Razzle Dazzle" RICKY LANCE (Alglobe)
"Yes It's You" SWEET CHARLES (People)
"Both Ends Against The Middle" RICHARD POPCORN WYLIE (Abc)
"Can You Feel It" SOUL (Musicor)
"You Can Be" THE PROPHETS OF PEACE (Maxx)
"You Know You're Wrong Don't You Brother" WALTER HEATH (Buddah)
”Your Love Keeps Drawing Me Closer" JOHNSON, HAWKINS, TATUM & DURR (Capsoul)
"We're In Love" THE DECISIONS (Soul Direction)
"(I'm Waiting For) Sweet Harmony" 7 SOUNDS LTD. (Sounds Unlimited)
"Gonna Make You Mine" ANGLO SAXON BROWN (Atlantic)
"Love Notes" THE LEGENDARY BEYONDS (Albina Music Trust)
"Think About It Girl" SOLID SOLUTION (Silver Spoon)
"He's Always Somewhere Around" DONNY GERRARD (Greedy)
"No Matter Where" G.C. CAMERON (Motown)
"Direct Me" CLYDIE KING (Lizard)
"Just Kissed My Baby" THE KILLER METERS (Scenario)
"Trying To Survive" LES STELLARIANS (Holygrailien)
"Dance The Night Away (Do It Disco)" MYRON & E (Timmion)
"Witchoo" DURAND JONES & THE INDICATIONS (Colemine)
"Rendezvous" WILL SESSIONS & AMP FIDDLER feat DAMES BROWN (Sessions Sounds)
"Too Much Of Anything (It Ain't Good)" CHANTIQUE (AIP)
"Hold On" THE RIGHTEOUS BROTHERS (Haven)
"Where Is The Love" JACK SASS BAND (Visa)
"Choosing You" LENNY WILLIAMS (Abc)
"Because You're You" MAGGTAPP (Preservation Project)
"P's & Q's" THE SUMMITS (Soul Direction)
"Mister Magic" KELLEE PATTERSON (Shady Brook)
"Hurt So Bad" BYRDIE GREEN (Prestige)
"I'll Be Forever Loving You"EDDIE HOLMAN (Abc)
"Alone Again" BOBBY OROZA (Big Crown)
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animebw · 3 years
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Binge-Watching: Pokemon Master Quest, Episodes 47-50
In which we’re basically running on fumes at this point, and there’s little left to do except wait for things to finally end.
Getting There
At this point, I’m genuinely unsure what’s left for me to say in regards to Pokemon. We’ve spent over 250 episodes following this journey through all its highs and lows and everything in between. We’ve done basically everything we can with Pokemon as a show, at least until the Hoenn reset wipes the slate clean and gives us a new sandbox to play in. At this point, there’s nothing meaningful left to do except take Ash to the Johto League and play out one last tournament arc before saying goodbye. And I get the sense that the show is pretty much aware of that fact. It’s doing its hardest to drag things out just a little longer with the usual time-wasting shenanigans, but it’s really just going through the motions at this point. Have a reunion with another one of Ash’s old Pokemon you haven’t seen for a while and likely never will again! Have another Protect the Egg subplot that lasts all of one episode before the egg hatches and gives Ash a new Pokemon (Though I will say, Ash pouching Larvitar’s egg like a kangaroo was a welcome touch)! Have another lackluster run-in with a legendary Pokemon who was way cooler in his movie appearance that goes noticeably unnoticed! The most I can say in terms of novelty is that the episode where Larvitar’s sick as a result of in-egg trauma is noticeably more intense than this show usually gets, with dark shadows and a sense of real medical danger to the poor baby’s condition. Also, Larvitar makes a decent metaphor for social anxiety and the importance of respecting boundaries. but we already know how good this show is at characterizing its Pokemon. We’ve seen these tricks countless times already; there’s nothing I can say about them that hasn’t already been said. All we can do is wait out the clock until the endgame and see how things wrap up.
Thankfully, we’re not far away now. There’s only fifteen episodes left in Pokemon’s original run, after which it’ll have its first big production reset to begin Gen 3 on a clean slate. How things change from there, if at all, I don’t know. But I hope the team takes some time to shake up the old formulas and go in new directions. Because after 250 episodes of this show, I could definitely use something new.
Best of Team Rocket
-On a crab robot: “I knew it was a good idea to model our robots after my moods!”
-”Then it’s full scheme ahead!”
-”To denounce the evils of a string bikini!”
-”Watch it, this rebel’s not without claws!”
-Was... was that a Heidi reference?
-WHY ARE YOU PLAYING ROCK PAPER SCISSORS WITH MASTER HAND I SWEAR TO GOD
-”Well, the good news is that we’ve got 100 gallons of banana smoothie!”
Odds and Ends
-So...is no one gonna bring up how Ash and company are the only audience in this giant stadium?
-”Well, if you ask me, not that you would-” Alright, Dorian, turn down the sass a little.
-”You’d think all that blasting off would teach those three a lesson.” Lol, fat chance of that.
-”Now for something completely different!” When suddenly, Misty Python’s Flying Circus.
-It’s confirmed, Misty would actually jump on a grenade for Psyduck.
-Jeepers, those are some nasty waterspouts.
-”And her mouth moves when she speaks!” dskjfhdf maybe lead with that one next time Brock
-I wonder what kinds of lives the professors and Ash’s mom live outside the screen. We need a sitcom starring them stat.
-”No one ever solved a medical mystery on an empty stomach!” Ash’s mom is great.
-So now Ash has psychic dream connections with Pokemon? Weird.
-Woah, sudden Mistreavous!
-This episode is all over the place. Hot sprints, chasing Entei, Larvitar’s shyness, and now Pineco evolves? Where’s the throughline?
Almost there. See you next time!
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