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#the good stuff but I also need an easy distraction from being anxious and sad all the time so I just end up in a cycle of
spicyicymeloncat · 11 months
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Forgive me but *villain arc*
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redriotinggg · 4 months
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related to Sanji and Usopp taking care of Zoro when he pushes himself too hard in a fight- do you think there are specific times Zoro and Usopp take care of Sanji? Or Zoro and Sanji caring for Usopp?
extra: Does the care for each person change based on what they need or generally stay the same? Is there stuff that works for one person that doesn't work for another/makes things worse for another? (Ex. Maybe Zoro loves having comfort food, but when Usopp's worried out of his mind he's way too nauseous to eat)
Once again, I have So Many thought about this so thank you for asking!
Sanji and Usopp both have attachment issues related to fears of abandonment and loneliness. Physical touch and verbal reassurance that no one is going anywhere or being left behind are the best ways to help calm them down.
Usopp was always prone to nightmares, but after Boin they get really bad. He often wakes up panicking and feeling the same type of fear he felt during those two years of constant fighting for survival. He often wakes up trembling, thinking that he’s alone and wondering if it’ll be the day the island makes a meal of him. It can be really hard to get through to him and bring back to reality. When he gets like this, talking to him only overwhelms him—makes him think he’s hallucinating like he did on Boin sometimes. Instead, they just stay in his line of sight and provide him with a grounding touch until he comes back to himself. Lots of kisses and cuddles ensue afterwards, and Zoro and Sanji are sure not to leave him alone through the day.
All three of them overwork themselves all the time so they’re often helping someone relax and/or get out of the negative space that might’ve caused them to overwork in the first place.
Sanji’s partners knew before they started dating that he is chronically allergic to taking it easy and it only got worse when they got together. As their boyfriend, it’s his duty to wait on them hand and foot. It’s his responsibility to put their needs before his own. If he doesn’t, then he’s failing them. Gently, they remind him that he doesn’t need to earn their love—he already has it and always will. Zoro and Usopp have learned that forcing him away from his work only causes Sanji more stress and anxiety, so they simply keep him company and massage his tense muscles when he finally allows himself to rest. They also make sure that he cooks himself something he enjoys so they can feed him and ensure their chef is well-fed and cared for.
Usopp gets stressed out when he feels like he isn’t contributing enough to the crew. The days where he wakes up anxious and paranoid. When he can’t seem to catch a single fish, successfully make any new ammo, or make progress on his inventions. When he tries to hide away in shame and self-punishment, his partners remind him that his value doesn’t lay in his contributions or what he can do. They distract him by retelling stories from their past or attempting to make something up on the spot.
Words are hard for all of them, sometimes. Sharing their feelings or hearing reassurances can be overwhelming for each of them. But physical touch—kisses, bone-crushing hugs, gentle hands cradling faces or carding through hair—are almost always welcome and make them all feel loved and appreciated.
“I wanna be alone.” TOO BAD. If anyone is sad or overwhelmed, they’re getting company. Whether they end up talking it out or sitting together in silence, no one is allowed to sit and wallow in their thoughts by themselves.
I’d definitely agree that food is always a way to comfort Zoro but may be too much for an anxious Usopp. They’re all pretty good at knowing what each person needs depending on what’s wrong.
NSFW: the sweet treatment Zoro gets after a tough battle is often accompanied by loving sex with his boyfriends, where they whisper to him—complimenting his muscles and physical strength, kissing over each and every scar and thanking him for his constant sacrifice. It always leaves him satisfied and reassured.
NSFW: dom!Usopp usually comes out after Sanji and Zoro have exerted a lot of mental and physical energy in a fight. He takes the lead and gets them to stop thinking and empty their heads, giving them both exactly what they need and letting them come back to the crew refreshed.
That’s all I’ve got for now, thanks again for the ask!
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manonamora-if · 6 months
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i dont know if u feel up for it to answer but like... how do u handle negative comments and ratings and just people being negative about ur stuff? bc i have someone just being rude in comments or like notes and game folders on itch and its making me want to just delete everything and never show anyone anything anymore. or even have an acocunt on itch either.
Hi Anon,
I'm sorry you've been dealing with this, and that it took me so long to answer. I've been thinking about this for a while honestly. I've been writing a bunch of drafts for this one, because my answer seems to change with the day or my mood. Some of my stuff have had some strange interactions lately that's made me question whether I should stay on itch myself. I mean, I don't think I'll ever leave... there are too many fun jams I want to participate and, you know, to force people to play my weird stuff. But I've been more anxious about new stuff or updates I share recently.
I don't blame you for wanting an out. Some users will poison one's experience of a platform, that even opening the site would give them anxiety. It doesn't take much to have events or projects soured. Often, just a few rude words is enough to make accounts disappear without a word. And many platform don't have good safety nets (blocking, moderation, reports) to temper or avoid these situations. Many will have half-ass solutions that, at the end of the day, still allows interactions from blocked users. It's easy to wonder if all of this is worth it...
Anyway, the very boring and short answer to your question: it depends.
The probably as boring and long one is a bit of a ramble:
It depends on the day, or the mood I have. It's easier to deal with comments when I'm confident and things are going find; but I'd feel more hurt or have a harder time dealing with them when I'm a bit more morose (I think most people feel this way). I'll disregard any (even barely) negative points some days, only to take it into consideration a few days later. <- this especially during jam/comps time, just need time to digest criticism of any kind.
It also depends on the content of the comment, their tone, and intent of the commenter. Not all negative comments are on the same level. I've had negative comments in the past where the commenter was genuine, and really gave my stuff a shot, bringing interesting points or important concerns. And though it hurt a bit, because being told you made a mistake sucks, those helped me grow. But those are the good kinds of comments...
On the other hand, I try to disregard the trolls, and the abusive comments (towards my work or me), the ones where the engagement was clearly not done in good faith... you know, the ones who will literally tell me I've made the world worse by uploading my games on itch. Doesn't mean that it doesn't affect me at all*. Some of them really hurt or made me angry and frustrated, some have lingered for hours or days in my mind, a few made me close to delete stuff as well. Words are not just empty things without meaning... *I've had to block a few people both here and other places recently because of it, they had become so insistent on wanting to engage with me while bashing most of my work, my values or the few aspects of my identity that I've shared online.
It would be easy to say I just don't give them the time of day or any of my energy, or that I pretend they don't exist, because, if I do, then the trolls win. But that would be lying. Obviously.
Screaming to the void/a pillow or ranting to friends have helped get rid of my anger and frustration. I've laughed with others about some comments I got (usually the bad faith ones, some of them are funny in how sad/bad they were). I think what worked best for me was just turn off the computer and go outside for a bit. Or turned off the internet and play silly games on my phone. Or picked up a book. Or watch a movie. Essentially, any activity that would distract me from it and force me to take a break. And when none of this worked, because some trolls are just that insistent, blocking/deleting stuff*. *unfortunately, it's not always possible, see second paragraph again.
It does suck that you're kinda forced to grow a thicker skin to enjoy or even exist in those spaces, and I wish those would be friendlier... but I don't think social platforms/the internet is going in that direction anytime soon.
Maybe not super helpful to your decision, but borogove.io hosts IF games (without ratings or comments, though people can download the files), so does the IFDB through the IFArchive (but there are ratings/reviews there, also can be downloadable). I've seen other peeps host their stuff on neocities (no ratings/comments). None of those platforms are like itch, in the positives or the negative. Or just be old school, and email stuff.
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tentacle-stylograph · 2 years
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:) i finally collected some stickers to put on my calendar to note when i worked on what i want to and other things. took a while. had episodes two and three of The Sandman playing in the background as i cut out surroundings for stickers and put protective tape over the semi-smaller ones, like the unicorns and the hearts and rainbows. the Demencia and 5.0.5. stickers are too big for that, but i eventually decided those didn't even need the "peel off and put on plastic backing step."
(unfortunately not too interested in The Sandman. there aren't any characters in particular i'm interested in... other than Abel and Lucienne, but they don't get enough screentime lol. i'm wondering if i would have been more interested if the story started with episode 3 and worked backward to develop context; an exorcist messing things up by successfully exorcising a demon is interesting.)
anyway.
personal training was good today. there's been definite strengthening in the past few weeks, most notable in that it was PRETTY EASY to hang from the grips for 20 seconds three times. originally even doing only 15 seconds three times was a struggle. but my hands CLAMPED today, which was surprising, instead of quickly starting to slip. super satisfying. my last hanging set i went to 31 seconds.
the ":(" for today is about how distracted i was. did zero homework and cooked zero food, which isn't good. finished the last steak i have in the fridge for lunch. lots of bad self-talk and lots of self-doubt kept me doing things that are 100% doable but not particularly important, like queueing, reblogging, and watching YouTube, instead of what's actually important and what i would have rather have been doing.
that part of the day was deeply miserable. almost just made this all a ":(" entry because of how miserable i was at myself that whole time -- wasted almost the whole day after 11:30 -- but the morning was good, and i was able to at least convince myself to do the sticker stuff. and shower. also bought two more jugs of protein powder in the morning since i'm almost out. need to buy more milk tomorrow
was reminded in training today that, if i really do have ADHD (seems likely -- my mom, brother, and i are all borderline through the questionnaire, and my mom gets tired from caffeine), then maybe caffeine will help me CALM DOWN and focus, rather than energizing me / getting me anxious
-sigh- it's 11.12 pm and i need to floss. haven't brushed my teeth since, uh, yesterday morning, i think? i would like to figure out a sticker system, too, like what stickers mean what and stuff like that. otherwise, it'll just be confusing and demotivating
anyway.
again, glad i got that done. sad i spent so many hours miserable at myself and not having done any homework. worried about the semester, but again glad to have that sticker sheet done. i'd been wanting to do that for a bit
__
...okay, just had the thought:
rainbow, Reginald (the eldritch fella), unicorn, and insect stickers = normal day accomplishments. one per hour of classwork
hearts and flowers = birthdays
Demencia and 5.0.5. = every fourth day of an hour of schoolwork (or projects, like days for weekends), with Fives being for the last ones in the month first coming after the first three Dems and then after the last two. (there's five Dems total and two 5.0.5.s; the others are already on the calendar)
shark = the last few days of the month :3 __
this is liable to change, especially the 5.0.5. and Dem system, and especially with how 5.0.5. works into it. reaching 5.0.5. might eventually feel like an unobtainable goal, so i just quit. ...or how 'bout after three Dems i get the first 5.0.5.? :) yeh, something like that for now
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honeyabyss · 3 years
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When Mc gets sick
Lucifer:
will scold the hell out of you
"didn't I tell you to take care of yourself?"
you can have only a slight cold and he will insist on you staying in bed for the rest of the week
humans are weak and die easily, and you're apparently stupid on top of that for getting sick even after his warning
will constantly sigh, scold and act like it's a huge nuisance taking care of you
says he doesn't care
actually cares a lot
keeps his brothers away from you, so you have peace and silence to recover
if your condition worsens he will grow panicked, he doesn't want to lose you!
will take you to a human world doctor so you can get the right treatment
after your recovery, he will be so paranoid and overprotective for the first few weeks, will wrap you up in blankets, constantly makes sure you drink and eat enough, will put his coat over your shoulders if he even just gets the idea you might find it cold
Mammon:
"that's your own fault!"
someone like the great Mammon would never get sick
leaves the room only to come back half an hour later panting and packed with bags full of medicine and other stuff you might need
he didn't know what you need so he got one of all
there isn't the right thing among it? oh well no worries he'll get you whatever you say
after all he cares a lot for his human, even though he denies it
he will keep you company and try to distract you from your pain through telling you about his new money making schemes, or try to get you to laugh through telling you about stories where he failed and received Lucifers punishment
he doesn't like that you  have to go through this so he tries to help you however he can
if you'll ask for some quiet time, he will struggle, it's not like he doesn't want you to have some rest to recover, it's just he is so worried and confused, he feels more at ease when you talk to him or laugh about his stories, if you answer that is prove you're still alive and breathing
once you've recovered everything goes back to normal, Mammon will be confident in his ability to take care of you...for now that is, it's probably diffrent once you're actually sick again
Leviathan:
stupid normie! An otaku like him doesn't get sick, because he never leaves his room and avoids interactions with others
he, of course, secretly cares though
"Mc? I brought you these anime that we can watch together to pass the time"
"oh and in case you want to rather read something in silence, I brought you some manga recommendations, but please don't sneeze all over them..."
does the online RAD lessons with you as he stays at home almost everyday anyway, so he can show you how they work and help you
he will awkwardly sit next to you on the bed, trying to keep a small distance between the two of you A) because he is shy and nervous and B) because he can't get sick, he would miss all his in-game raids
will ask if you want to play games as well, but soon realizes that you two won't be making much progress with your current reaction time, so he chooses an easy and fun game for you
he wouldn't admit it but he might have set the game to the easiest settings and he himself plays slower for you
he is actually kind of disappointed when you recover so quick, he will miss you now that you visit RAD again instead of doing the online lessons with him, but he is glad you're feeling better again...maybe you could stay home more often with him though?
Satan:
he will buy and read every single human medicine book so he can find the best solution to your illness
will obviously read them in your room, because he can't leave you alone in this state
makes sure to keep you warm and makes you herbal tea depending on your symptoms
will skip school in favour for your well-being, especially keeps this behaviour up when Lucifer gets mad about it
will yell at everyone who dares to try and enter your room while your still sick, how dare they disturb your rest
will get embarassed about yelling and actually being the disturbance to you himself, will apologize and leave your room to keep reading somewhere else, still checks up on you occasionally and brings you light novels to read so you don't get bored
will come in stumbling into your room with the perfect medicine to cure you, only to find that you're already feeling better
gets embarassed yet again, but says it was worth reading all these books as he can now react faster the next time you get sick
will keep a check on your health and make sure you're always taking care of yourself
Asmodeus:
keep your snotty face away from him, but also come cuddle
he is very conflicted, because getting sick is not good for his skin, but he also wants to make you feel better with his hugs
will wear a mask so he doesn't get infected that easily
Asmo doesn't know much about medicine but he knows that certain herbs are good for your health, so he'll make you a nice herbal bath to boost your healing
also will take over your skin care routine and adjust it while your sick so your skin doesn't get worse, says he will only buy a refreshing face mask, comes back with more stuff though... I mean what did you expect from him?
will stay in bed with you and constantly cuddle so you don't feel lonely
he will most definetly whine if you ask him for some space or alone time, but does comply...fo at most half an hour, look this is hard on him too! His darling is sick and he can't do anything but be a moral support for you
if you thought he stops to cling to you once you've recovered, then you're mistaken, he will give you so many kisses and hugs having missed being able to do that
Beelzebub:
"Will food make you feel better?"
"You don't feel like eating?"
the poor boy is so confused, you're going to die if you don't eat! He will ask Satan what humans need when they're sick
will make yoou the perfect meal based on your symptoms, he'll even hold back on eating from it
he has a huge smile on his face while he watches you eat what he prepared, he is so proud that you like what he made you
eat as much as you can, Beel will eat everything you can't, all this boy wants for you to eat at least a bit so you have enough strength to recover
you get cold? cuddle time!
there is no way Beel will leave your side for as long as you're sick, he'll hold you close and share all his warmth and food with you
is so happy when you're better again. Will celebrate it with inviting you to a restaurant
Belphegor:
being sick is like being sleepy right?
he will just go back to sleep next to you as if nothing happend
wakes up because of your coughs and pretends to be annoyed, but is actually worried
will leave the comfort of the bed to get you some medicine, before wrapping you up into a blanket burrito and cuddling into you
don't expect to be getting up any time soon, he wants to sleep...you better not have to go to the bathroom
sleeping is best medicine but Belphie takes this a bit to literally, you two will almost only sleep
once you're better he will still want to sleep using you as a pillow, good luck getting out of that situation
Diavolo:
"Are you dying Mc?"
"Barbatos turn back the time before Mc got sick! -Wait you're going to be okay?"
Don't scare him like that! He is always ready to save you from death!
He will let you live at the castle for the time being and appoints the best doctor to take care of you, because he still isn't completly convinced you're going to make it
Does his work in your room, so he can keep a check on you
will not do much work much to Barbatos dismay, Dia is just so worried about you and will constantly ask if you need anything
his breaks consist of hugging you gently and drinking some tea with you
he will literally cry and almost crush you in his hug, when you're finally healthy again. This man was so anxious about losing you, even thugh he could've commanded Barb to just turn back time
Barbatos:
*smiles*
he knew you were going to get sick, so he's prepared
knocks on your door in the house of lamentation, before you're even able to tell anyone that you're sick
made himself a very strict schedule for everything so he can help you and still attend to his duties as a butler
gives the brothers various tasks so they can indivdually take care of you in the time he isn't able to be there for you
he will get back to you in the evening after having finished all his work for the day
will make you a light dinner and sit next to your bed
stays with you until you fall asleep stroking you hair and holding one of your hands, when you wake up the next morning Barb await you with a small breakfast, if he stayed over night or left and came back in the morning will stay a secret of his
is relieved and at the same time sad when you've recovered, will miss coming over and seeing you, maybe you can return the favor and visit him at the castle sometimes...
Solomon:
is a human so he knows what to do...
but magic is quicker!
he tries to heal you with a spell, but he just end up making it worse
"Oh no Mc I'm so sorry! Let me make it up by taking care of you!"
undefined matter soup a la Solomon, "eat this", he said, "You'll feel better", he said ...you don't feel better...
the brothers will get so angry and throw him out of the house, he is only allowed to come back once you've recovered, actually scratch that he's not setting foot anywhere near you again if it were for the demons
but Solomon finds his way into your room through your window...will stay over the night, cuddling you and constantly apologizing
will laugh about the whole ordeal once you've recovered
Simeon:
he is so calm, like yeah? Humans get sick, but they recover soon if taking care of correctly
Simeon is just the best!
he knows the right food to make for you, will give you the best medicine and make sure you're taking it at the right time
will make sure you're always comfortable
bored?  "let me get you a book!"
tired?  "let me fluff your pillow so you can sleep better!"
he will sit next to you the whole time looking so calm and confident
he will pray for you to get better quick so you don't have to suffer too long
promises you to take care of you again if you get sick in the future, this man just wants to be there for you
Luke:
"Are you dying Mc?" Version 2.0
no seriously are you? Will you become an  angel? We can live together in the celestial realm and bake desserts for Micheal!
Mc why are you so angry? No you misunderstood I don't actually want you to die!
Is so sorry he couldn't protect you from getting sick, he will feel so helpless
Simeon and you will cheer him up and tell him there wasn't anything he could have done to prevent it
Luke will bake you light desserts so you can eat some sweets while recovering
will visit you daily with Simeon after school and tell you about the day
crushes you in a big hug once you're healthy again
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leejeongz · 3 years
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fluffy a-z SUNGHOON (enhypen)
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requested: yes, by anon
🔅the comeback!!???!!!?! amazing. i just had to write this today i just HAD TO. this is really long but nevertheless i hope you enjoy🔅
A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
he loves holding your hand even at the most random times. if you seem anxious or upset, his hand slowly creeps closer to yours, just to remind you that he’s there. he’s not a fan of pda, but holding your hand is just fine :D. (taken from my enha as boyfriends post)
he messes up your hair (but only when he knows it’s okay to do so, he knows his place lol) when you do something silly or cute. he also does it when he’s first introducing you to people too. he’ll be all like “this is y/n, my gf/bf/partner” and then ruffle your hair, just to once again show them that you’re his.
similarly, he loves when you play with his hair. he’ll purposely rest in head in your lap so that your hands naturally fall to his hair. sometimes, he accidentally drifts off to sleep like that and then wakes up a few minutes later all smiley hehe.
B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)
you don’t have the chance to meet up a lot, most of your contact is via text since he doesn’t have the time to call you all day, every day. he’s super supportive of you, he’s your wingman, your hype man and your parent all in one. he looks out for you as much as possible and (even if you’re not younger than him) he treats you like his younger sibling.
there’s always a lot of laughter when you two are together that stems from the assortment of inside jokes that you share. you can talk for hours despite neither of you being the talkative type (mainly about other people lmao.)
as a pair, you’re often misunderstood. people never associate you with each other but you just know that you don’t always need to be with each other to still be the closest of friends. when you are together, you’re an intimidating duo that people often avoid through fear, but you’re actually really nice 🥺😔
C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
he uses cuddles as a way to distract you and/or annoy you. can and will be the big spoon every time you cuddle. he loves cuddling with you, holding you or just touching you, he’s just shy okay. he loves having you in his arms and holding you, especially when he knows you’ve chosen to cuddle with him over doing something important. cuddling with him just makes him want to cuddle all day :((. so if you start cuddling at 10am, except to still be in his arms at 7pm. more so than cuddling, he likes draping his legs over you “to irritate you” (he just wants to be close to you hehe). it makes him feel like he’s protecting you without it being too hot and stuffy and oppressive.
D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
there’s no time frame for him when it comes to settling down. he wants to settle down but there’s no deadline for him. he’s not actively looking for the love of his life at any point, he’s never going to force himself to be in love just for the sake of creating family. he thinks about settling down a lot, he wants a pet with the person he loves for sure, he’s excited for that day to come, but it doesn’t have to happen soon.
cleaning, he’s fabulous at. the house or apartment is minimalistic anyway, so things that are out of place are easy for him to spot and move. he almost enjoys doing chores with you even, just because he’s spending time with you. when it comes to cooking,,, like sure he’s confident which is so sweet but that doesn’t always mean a good meal. but please don’t tell him that else he’ll get really sad and disappointed in himself.
E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)
if he was to break up with you, it would probably be a “right person wrong time” kinda thing. he wouldn’t get into a relationship if he didn’t see a future with that person, he’s very picky to find the perfect person for him. you’re definitely the right person, but he’s just too busy right now being an idol. he feels guilty for not spending time with you and so he wants to let you live you life, without being tied down so early on. he’d hope that you’d wait for him, but he’d understand it if you didn’t.
F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)
commitment is a big part of the relationship for him. he would want commitment from day one, even if he's not officially your boyfriend yet.
he doesn’t care when you get married, but he definitely wants to get married someday. he likes the idea of dedicating one whole day to celebrating your love for each other, and sharing that with friends and family too. it would quite literally be the best day of his life. he’d propose to you pretty quickly into the relationship, but at a time that felt right. you both knew it was something that you wanted, that you dreamed your relationship would last forever, so why not propose?! he doesn’t mind eating years for the wedding though, it’s a big deal and everything has to be perfect.
G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
emotionally, he acts quite tough. he doesn’t want to be seen as weak, but at the same time he wants to show his emotions to let you know that’s he’s mature, and that emotions aren’t a sign of weakness. he often keeps really troubling things to himself until he can tell you and you only. you’re the only person who knows him truly, you know everything about him because he’s only willing to share this stuff with you. when it comes to things in your relationship, he also isn’t afraid to speak his mind. he’s not trying to be gentle or tough with his emotions when it comes to you, everything seems like a natural reaction, he’ll cry when he wants to and he’ll be stubborn when he wants to.
physically, of course, he’s very gentle. every touch feels like feathers, every kiss, every hug, every smile, it’s all just very soft and gentle. you notice that he talks to you differently too. his tone with others appears harsher and more blunt than with you. with you, it’s like he’s talking to a baby (in a non- condescending way ofc he’s very mature and you’re not allowed to forget that)
H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)
when he’s congratulating you on something, when he’s proud of you for something, he hugs you. it’s better for him to communicate using hugs rather than telling you because he’s a little shy saying it, even though he means it.
he likes when you rest your head by his neck, while his arms are holding you close. he kisses where your ear is through your hair or your head while you’re hugging and (when he manages to finally say it) whispers a little “i love you”. it’s a tight hug, but it doesn’t last long. when you pull away, he reaches out to hold your hand, he doesn’t want to separate just yet.
if you initiate the hug, he laughs and grunts and lot just to tease you, but don’t be fooled he’s really happy that you are hugging him!!!
I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)
oh you pair beat around the bush a whole lot. it’s pretty much unspoken for the first year or so. although you never said it to each other, you both knew.
it wasn’t until sunghoon had left you for a little bit while he went on tour (not left as in broke up, just went out of the country lmao idk how to write that in a coherent sentence big sorry) that you realised that you should probably say it. he returned home and it was on that day that you told him you loved him while nestled against his chest in a satisfying hug after such a long time apart. he said it back straight away, looking down at you and waiting expectedly for your lips to meet with his.
he was always waiting for you to say it first, there were moments when he thought he should just say it, but he wanted to wait, he wanted to hear you say it.
J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)
he gets jealous quite quickly and he always makes you aware of his jealousy no matter how petty the situation may be. he wouldn’t try to hide it, or compromise with you, he wants you all to himself so if there’s even a chance that another boy could possibly be flirting with you, he’ll be mad.
that being said, he’d definitely voice his opinions in a mature and well thought through manner. he would think of how to say things to make you understand where he’s coming from without trying to guilt trip you into unfriending that person, he doesn't want to be THAT guy. he’ll just explain his side and wait to hear your response, and often times it turns into a sarcastic, inside joke which reassures him a lot. he’s just like “fine, go to the cafe with him, but he wouldn’t know which smoothie you like best, would he?!”
K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)
him initiating kisses? few and far between. but when he does, you know he means it. he loves all types of kisses, he just wants to cover you in kisses sometimes, but he’s gotta keep up his image of course. pecks on the lips and longer, more passionate kisses are his favourites though, he just can’t get enough of your lips. (taken from my enha as boyfriends post)
as i mentioned in the hugging part, he likes to kiss your head or place a kiss where he thinks your ear is while hugging. it sends a rush though the both of you, it just really makes you both think about how lucky you are to have each other.
L = Little ones (How are they around children?)
a little awkward at first. he’s not sure how to talk to them, and every time he speaks the kids are just like ”??” because he says things that are a little too mature for them.
it will take him some time to be comfortable and confident around the kids, but he wants to be liked by them and he wants them to be happy so he will not give up until that happens.
although, it does have to be said, he’d much rather have a pet than a kid 😳
M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)
usually, sunghoon wakes up before you. he gets up before you wake up too, and sits and stares at the wall with a blank mind, just to wake himself up a bit. once you get up, he’s gonna ask if you wanna go back to bed again and cuddle and/or watch some tv together when he has a day off. if you agree, he’d bring some toast with him for you both to eat. but if not, you’d just grab some cereal together and eat while sat around your dining table in silence because he does not want to talk first thing in the morning (valid,,, extremely valid)
N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)
sunghoon is a big fan of evening dates as opposed to going somewhere during the day. everywhere is quieter and this is usually his free time so you have him all to yourself, you can do whatever you want together. as much as he enjoys going to fancy restaurants, bars and what not (which usually take you into the late hours of the night), he’d still rather spend some time at home with you.
on those nights that he can spend at home with you, he likes to just rest with you. chilling on the sofa just watching some episodes of your favourite show, ordering a takeaway. you share your thoughts about the show and that’s all you really talk about while it’s on, but afterwards you talk about your day and head to bed, where you cuddle until you both fall asleep (which is pretty quickly since you stayed up late to watch more tv)
O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)
like anyone, he overshares when you first start dating due to nerves. you learn a lot about him through this and he’s actually pretty grateful that you do the same thing. you pretty much know everything about him before actually getting into a relationship. throughout the relationship, he’d never try to hide his feelings about certain things and would be pretty hurt if you used things that he’d told you against him.
P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)
with you, he doesn’t get that angry. you’d have to do something really vile for him to show actual aggression and disappointment. with other people, it’s not so simple. he finds a lot of things that other people do irritating but he wouldn’t show his anger there and then. he’s more likely to go home and get angry there. he’d appreciate someone to talk to about it, a shoulder to cry on perhaps. definitely an angry crier (cries when he’s angry) and likes to slam doors to make a point.
he’s not afraid of confrontation when something that someone did is actually wrong. he will stand up for what he believes in and it’s worth putting a friendship on the line given their opposing opinions.
Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)
this bitch acts SO dumb when you ask him stuff but he knows… he knows everything. everything you’ve ever said is stored in his brain, probably written in his notes app as a back up. he’s ready to spring this knowledge on you at any point. he knows exactly what you like and what you dislike, important dates, about your childhood, he even remembers how certain things he did made you feel, so he could do them more or avoid them in the future. but of course, if you ask him, he knows nothing.
R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)
you weren’t even together officially at this point, but when he turned up at your place on prom night. he’ll never forget how stunned he was when he saw you looking all glamorous that evening. you had some photos taken as a pair, egged on by your friends of course because you’d never normally do that, and he looks at them a lot. he can’t help but think how great you look as a couple (and how you two are going to look on wedding photos 🥺). he had a rose prepared for you, a white one because he knew it would go with your outfit, whatever colour it was and also because of its symbolism. he really wanted to confess when he handed it to you, but he over thought it a lot and the moment ended up passing too quickly. that’s his favourite memory. something that he’ll never forget.
S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)
i know i said he got jealous a lot, but he’d distance himself when it actually came to it. he’d be jealous in his own space until you two were alone rather than being protective while the act that made him feel that way was ongoing. as i mentioned above, he does indeed want you all to himself, but he’d hate to cause unnecessary drama and have you lose friends over a silly misunderstanding.
if you were clearly very uncomfortable around someone, he’d be there with an arm wrapped around you. you’d both like to think that his presence alone is intimidating enough, but sometimes he has to resort to harsh one liners to get them to back off.
i don’t think he’d ever get into a physical fight. it’s not that you’re not worth it, but he just feels it would make the situation worse.
T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
he really wants to put a lot of effort into your dates, but he finds it difficult because one, he has no time and two, he doesn’t want to disappoint you/organise something you end up hating. most dates are spontaneous and on a whim, but also like… planned in both of your minds. like you know you want to go and you know he wants to go, but it’s not confirmed that it will actually happen until the time of the date if that makes sense. when it comes to it, he gets really shy asking you out on dates, so you’ve kind of just started to read each other’s minds lmao.
he never forgets your birthday or your anniversary. he makes a big deal out of your anniversary because it’s a celebration of you both, he wants to make you feel special and will do everything he can to do so. you pair make your own traditions when it comes to days like that, and he looks forward to them a lot. your birthday is pretty much left down to you (other than his gift for you of course). he doesn’t want to do a poor job of planning anything for your special day so he just leaves it and hopes that you do something instead, if you wanted a party you should have organised it. he would help you plan it thought, anything you want he’d do for you.
his gifts are always things that you like. things that you can treasure and things that you can display and show off are his go to. jewellery is a common gift that you receive from him and every single piece that he’s picked out is so delicate and beautiful.
U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)
when you pair are out with mutual friends, he likes to tease you. sometimes he takes it too far without realising it, the atmosphere becomes tense and he becomes even more awkward and wants to leave the situation just to apologise to you but realises it will probably make everything 10 times more awkward.
V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)
he’s a handsome teenager surrounded by other pretty people of course he’s gonna have some concerns about how he looks. actually i don’t think concerns would be the right word. he’s very confident in his appearance, why wouldn’t he be, but he also thinks that everyone else should be too, everyone is attractive in their own way. in reality, he’s very humble about how handsome he is despite constantly flexing his visuals lmao.
W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
you do a lot for him, not just as in help him out with cooking or whatever, but his mental state. you’ve allowed him to mature a lot and he’s become more emotionally intelligent with you.
he’d hate to think of how his life would be if he wasn’t with you, he wouldn’t be the same person at all.
X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)
one of the first dates you went on was to build a bear, it was his idea surprisingly (he wanted to see which animal/character you picked out, okay?!) you stuffed each other’s teddies and returned them to each other in time to name them. you named yours sunghoon first, he followed by naming his y/n. you both sleep with them on the bed and hug them tightly when you’re not together :( (but your never tell each other that’s what you do lol)
Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)
people who are all up in his face. just back off, yeah? chill out for a second. he gets that you’re excited, and he wouldn’t want to bring you down, but you don’t need to get up in his grill. personal space is a big one for him. if you don’t respect that, then he’s not gonna have any time for you.
Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)
the prettiest sleeper on the planet. his lips are slightly separated and his eyelashes often flutter as if he’s about to wake up, but it’s actually just a sign of him having a really pleasant dream.
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miracleonice87 · 3 years
Note
anything with matty tkachuk! but maybe a fluffy one where it’s your first season living together after being long distance for awhile and it’s like the moments you guys go through? first fight, first night together, new game day rituals, etc.
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a/n: the last of the requests for the moment! I’ll probably open them back up soon. here’s a piece with a few vignettes referred to in the request. enjoy! 
warnings: partners arguing, brief mention of sex
_____
Firsts
first night…
“You’re going to throw your back out.”
Matthew scoffed. “You think you’re so heavy but you weigh next to nothing,” he insisted, scooping his arm beneath the crooks of your knees, the other steady beneath your underarms as he lifted you off the ground.
You chuckled, covering your face with your hand shyly.
“Matthew,” you whined. He shook his head.
“Nope, we’re doing it,” he told you, walking toward the front door. “You’re finally moving in with me. We’re doing the cheesy ‘carry you over the threshold’ thing.”
You couldn’t argue with that. Smiling, you looped your arms around his neck and resigned to his resolve. A few yards more, and Matthew was kicking open the door with one foot.
As he stepped into the house, he let out an adorable “ta daaa!” and beamed at you.
“Welcome home, princess,” he said sweetly. You leaned in to kiss him and pinched gently at his cheek.
“Thank you, my love,” you said. Matthew put you down carefully and closed the door behind him. As you stepped forward into the living room — your living room — you spotted not only a gorgeous bouquet of blush pink roses, but also an overflowing gift basket filled with an array of your favorite items. The jasmine candles you always burned in your own apartment, the lavender tea you drank each night before bed, your favorite shampoo and conditioner, the shower gel you always stocked up on at your favorite St. Louis boutique — all of it, and more, was tucked inside.
“Baby…” you began breathlessly, running your hand along the perimeter of the wicker. “What did you do?”
Matthew approached from behind with a smile, wrapping his arms around your middle and burying a kiss in your hair.
“I just wanted you to have some things that’ll hopefully make you feel at home here,” he said somberly. “And I gotta admit, Taryn helped me track down the stuff from St. Louis,” he added with a chuckle.
You turned in his hold to face him, and he noted the glistening in your green eyes as he reached for your face.
“You are so sweet. Thank you, baby,” you said, pressing your lips against his. When you parted, Matthew noticed the way your bright smile had faded. He knew why.
As thrilled as you were to be moving in with Matthew at last after a full year of dating long distance, you were still anxious leaving your hometown of St. Louis. You couldn’t wait to start your life in Calgary with Matthew, but living so far from your family and childhood friends had you battling homesickness from the second you took off from Lambert. The reality had caused you to break down on the plane and was bringing tears to your eyes once more.
“You okay?” Matthew asked kindly, kissing your forehead repeatedly. You held his wrists and nodded.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” you said.
“I know it’s not gonna be easy, sweetheart,” Matthew said, pulling you closer. “But your parents are welcome here anytime, and you can go visit them literally whenever you want. And you know my parents are gonna be up here way more now that you’re here. We all know they like you better than me,” he told you, pulling a giggle from you as you looked up at him with a smirk.
“There’s a smile,” he said. You nodded, sniffling.
“Trust me, Matthew, I’m so happy to be here with you,” you assured him. “This is where I’ve wanted to be for so long, and you’re so gracious for having me here. And I can’t believe how thoughtful these gifts were. The excitement I feel to start my life with you outweighs any sadness I’ll feel. Trust me on that.”
Matthew grinned, and you couldn’t help but reflect his joy in your own expression.
“I love you, princess,” he said, hugging you tight. “Welcome home.”
“I love you, too, Matthew,” you said against his shoulder.
_____
first fight…
It had taken a few weeks, but you soon settled into your new life in Calgary with little trouble. Spending every day with Matthew felt like a dream — you were both giddy when you hopped into bed together each night and woke up next to each other the following morning.
As Matthew began training camp, you found your own routine with your work as a freelance graphic designer. You only put in about twenty to thirty hours per week, which Matthew knew you did because you wanted to, not because you felt you needed to. He reminded you every so often that you could quit at any point if you no longer felt the need to work — though you told him not to hold his breath.
Matthew refused to let go of his housekeeper, as he wanted to save you from doing all of the chores, though you did insist on taking over the bulk of the household duties because you actually found them enjoyable — scheduling, grocery shopping, meal planning, cooking, laundry, and paying bills.
It was that last little item that caused the first tiff between you and Matthew since you had moved in with him — in fact, the first tiff the two of you had had in months.
One afternoon, after Matthew returned home from practice, he kissed your cheek and grabbed a glass of water before sitting down at the kitchen table to chat with you, as he did almost every day. As you worked on a logo design for a client, Matthew sat scrolling through his phone; then, eyebrows furrowing, he paused.
“Hey, babe?” he began. You acknowledged him with a distracted “hmm?” without looking away from your screen.
“It’s no big deal if so,” Matthew spoke, “but did you forget to pay the water bill this month? And maybe… maybe the electric bill, too? I don’t see that they’ve been deducted from my account yet, so I just wanna make sure they’re not late.”
Heat crept up your neck and chest as you slowly closed your laptop, pursing your lips to the side. When you didn’t respond right away, Matthew looked at you curiously.
You took a deep breath and pulled your legs underneath you, curling up and wishing you could hide from this altogether.
“Don’t be mad…” you said softly.
Not a good start, Matthew thought to himself. He clicked his phone to lock it and set it aside, folding his arms on the table.
“Babe…” he said, a warning in the single word.
You picked nervously at the seam of your leggings. “Okay. I kind of…” you cleared your throat, stalling. “I kind of paid those two out of my own account. But just those two. I swear.”
Matthew rolled his eyes, pushing himself out of his seat as he muttered, “oh, my god.”
Yep, he was pissed.
After pacing for a few moments, Matthew crossed his arms against his chest and faced you.
“I thought we talked about this,” he said, clearly frustrated.
You dropped your head. “I-I know…” you said timidly. “We did. I just-“
“And you paid them yourself anyway? Despite having already discussed it?” he questioned, his volume rising.
With lightly shaking hands, you tucked some hair behind one ear and swallowed hard, unable to meet his gaze, which was sure to be intense.
“Yes,” was all you could manage.
Matthew tossed his baseball cap on the table and sighed loudly, resuming his pacing across the hardwood.
“Baby, we can’t start out like this,” he said firmly. “I didn’t ask you to come live with me so we could split the cost of living like you’re some random roommate of mine. I asked you to move in because I want to share my life with you — I wanna share everything with you. I make more money than I’ll ever be able to spend, and you should not be spending your own money to pay our bills.”
As he spoke, you chewed anxiously on the inside of your cheek. When he paused, he sighed once more.
“Can you look at me, please?” he requested.
With a shaky inhale, you did as he asked, and his gaze softened the moment he saw the unease on your face.
“What’s goin’ on here, baby?” Matthew asked. “You’ve gotta talk to me. We’re partners.”
You pulled the sleeves of your sweatshirt down to cover your closed fists as you considered how even to answer him. Finally, you decided on a simple response.
“I feel like a mooch,” you said quietly, your eyes traveling downward again.
Out of your frame of vision, Matthew’s face fell. He felt sick at what he had just heard. He crossed the room swiftly, easily pulling out your chair and turning it to face him. He knelt before you and gathered your hands in his own.
“Princess… hey,” he said gently as he reached to smooth his hand over your hair. “Look at me.” This time, it wasn’t a question.
You forced yourself to look at him, finding immediate comfort in the tender way he was now looking at you as compared to before. He squeezed your thighs soothingly as he spoke again.
“You are anything but a mooch,” he said with conviction. “You are my girlfriend, who I love — who I’m obsessed with. You’re the person I want to spend my life with. I wanna take care of you in every way I possibly can, including financially. You know what I mean?”
You nodded slowly, unable to think of a convincing argument against him.
“I don’t want to fight about this with you,” Matthew continued, shaking his head. “We shouldn’t be fighting about money. Listen, if you want to spend your money on things that are only yours, that’s fine. Even though I really wish you wouldn’t even do that.” He muttered the last part and you offered the tiniest smile. “I don’t want you footing our bills, babe. You don’t need to worry about that. Okay? I want you to let me take care of all of that. Please?”
You nodded slowly. “I’m sorry,” you whispered. “I didn’t want to go behind your back. I just felt like I wanted to contribute.”
Matthew gave you a disbelieving expression. “Contribute? Babe, you contribute so much. You’ve barely been here a month and shit around here is more organized than it’s ever been. You’ve already got this place running like a well-oiled machine,” he told you as you breathed a chuckle. “You take care of me in countless ways. Let me handle the money. That’s the easy part.”
You let your head roll back with a sigh, knowing that Matthew was being the logical one in this instance. “Okay,” you agreed as you wrapped your arms around his neck. “I will. I’m sorry.”
Matthew shook his head, kissing the tip of your nose and then your lips. “Don’t be sorry,” he said. “Let’s just go upstairs and have make-up sex since this was our first fight in forever.”
You threw your head back in laughter. “You are something else,” you told your boyfriend, who was already picking you up out of your chair and toting you upstairs.
_____
first game…
As you stood in your closet selecting an outfit for Matthew’s home opener, you felt a familiar pair of arms snake around your waist and a set of lips you knew well come to rest on your cheekbone. A grin overtook your face.
“Good morning, sunshine,” you teased as Matthew relentlessly planted kisses on your skin. “How was your nap? I didn’t wake you, did I?”
You turned his direction, and Matthew shook his head. You smoothed the short curls atop his head and he nearly purred, making you laugh.
“My nap was good,” he said with a yawn. “And you’re gonna make me fall asleep again if you keep doing that.”
You snickered, kissing his jaw, before you turned back around and reached for a couple articles of hanging clothing.
“Once you pick what you’re wearing, can you make me a cup of coffee?” Matthew asked from behind.
Your brows pulled together, puzzled, and you cocked your head as you turned back toward him.
“Are you really that helpless?” you said in your best teasing tone.
Matthew rolled his eyes lightheartedly and said, “No, I can make my own, but I don’t want to. We’ve got a good thing going.”
You shook your head, amused. “Okay, I’m lost,” you told him, hanging your outfit on the back of the closet door to steam later. “What are you talking about?”
Matthew followed you out of the closet and toward the hall.
“You made me my coffee before the last three preseason games at home, remember? And we won them all,” he said matter-of-factly. “So yeah, if you don’t mind, we’re gonna keep that going. Unless you wanna be the reason we lose…”
“No!” you exclaimed immediately. Matthew laughed — he knew that would do the trick, as you were nearly as superstitious as he. “I’m going now,” you said. As you turned to descend the stairs, you glanced back at him, batting your lashes. “Cream and sugar?” you asked sweetly. 
Matthew laughed hysterically and tickled your sides as he followed you down to the kitchen, thankful once more that you were here to share not only his home with him, but his life. 
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supercorpkid · 3 years
Text
The price of magic.
Supercorp, Kara Danvers x Daughter!Reader, Lena Luthor x Daughter!Reader
Word Count: 2210.
Turns out the price of magic was higher than you had anticipated. You’ve been away for more than a year, but for your family it was nothing but a week. Sure they’ve missed you and they were out there looking for you with no clue of where you could have gone. But for you?
A year in Storybrooke was experiencing your life as you’ve always imagined. Being yourself in its totality. No Luthor name hanging over your head, no hiding yourself behind glasses or a red and blue superhero suit. It was being both Kryptonian and human at the same time, with no fear of judgment or dislike.
Storybrooke was like going on a super long vacation; so long it made you forget all of your problems. But that doesn’t mean that your problems went away. They came back as soon as you stepped foot in National City.
The price of magic was feeling guilty for being happier somewhere else. It was walking into your bedroom and feeling at home but also somehow not at all. It was walking around the craziness of National City and feeling suffocated like you’re in a crowded room full of empty faces. It was missing the words ‘honey’ and ‘sweetheart’ when people were referring to you. It was having a crazy number of options of take-out food but wanting nothing except the food in Granny’s diner.
And you weren’t the only one to pay the price. You can feel how high it was for Kara and Lena too.
“Mom?” You sit up on the bed, looking at Lena standing in your bedroom watching you sleep. “What are you doing creeping over my bed at-” You look at your alarm clock. “3 in the morning?”
“I had to be sure you were still here.” Lena says, sounding small and scared.
“Mom, I’m not going to disappear from my bedroom in the middle of the night.” You say, trying to reassure her, but it backfires you.
“You can’t blame me for thinking that, because you did.” She holds your arm, and you hear the cry in her cracked voice.
“Would you feel better if you stayed here with me?” You make space for her. Lena hum in agreement, lying next to you. “I’m sorry.”
“I’m even more.” She kisses the back of your hand. “A whole year without us. You were probably so scared we weren’t looking for you.”
“I knew you were.”
“You got so tall, and we weren’t even there to see it!” Lena complains and you give her a sad little smile, even though she can’t see your face at all in the darkness of your bedroom.
“Well, I chose a weird age to have a growth spurt .” You joke, but you don’t get a laugh in return. You sort of always knew when you would get taller. It was the same with Kara. You were always very anxious to turn 17, because that was the age she actually grew more. But the weird thing is that you’re not really 17 now. Like Kara is not really 70.
“Come here.” Lena hugs you and you settle back. You’re almost drifting off to sleep when she whispers. “Don’t ever leave again.”
You can’t promise that you won’t. Stranger things have happened in your life, you don’t really feel like you have control over that anymore. And weird as it may seem, you also don’t want to have control over that. Because if you had, if you could have chosen, you probably wouldn’t have met some of the people that you love so much now.
“Hey!” You walk in the kitchen, to both Kara and Lena still having breakfast despite how late already is. “What are you two doing?”
“Having breakfast.” Kara explains, like it isn’t obvious.
You look at the clock. “It’s nine.” You raise an eyebrow at them. “And it’s Monday.”
“Yes.” Lena agrees.
“On Mondays you go to work, and Kara does her usual Kara’ stuff.”
“You were gone for a week. Even if L Corp burned down in flames I wouldn’t leave your side today.” Lena answers you, and you smile softly. You look at Kara next.
“Oh, well, if L Corp was burning up in flames I probably would have to go to put out the fire.” She says but adds in a hurry. “But I would be here five seconds later!”
“Ok.” You chuckle. “I thought I would go see Jamie and Maya on their lunch break, but if you two want me to stay-”
“No! Baby, no. Go see your cousin and your girlfriend. They were missing you too.” Lena hands you your phone. “There’s a lot of texts from them.”
“Oh, a phone! God I haven’t had one in a while.” You smile scrolling through your messages, ignoring your moms questioning looks.
“So, maybe you could tell us how was your life there.” Kara asks, but you’re too distracted with your phone to notice. You haven’t used one in a while, not because there weren’t phones in Storybrooke, but because you didn’t need them. It was a super small city, you could find anyone easily, and because Emma and Charming were sheriffs, you all used radio transmitters to talk. “Hey? Little one, helloooo.”
“Sorry momma.” You put your phone down. “What did you say?”
“We want to know about your life there. I mean, for us it wasn’t that long, but for you it was a whole year. You probably did lots of things.” Kara says and you agree with your head.
“Yeah, I guess.” You shrug. “I used to help mom Emma out with the saving, and oh, mom Regina helped me with my panic attacks. And I’m a lot better at controlling them! Henry and I used to watch this awesome TV show that I probably won’t ever know how it ends now. And grandma taught me archery.”
“Oh, that sounds-” Lena thinks about it for a second. “Fun.”
“Yeah. It was so great. And every night all of us would get together at Granny’s diner and talk about our days, and sometimes I would go hang out with Belle in the library, so I read all the books there. And if I had stayed a little bit longer and turned 18 there, then grandpa would’ve taught me how to use a gun.”
“A little bit? It would’ve been a whole other year!”
“For me, I guess.” You shrug again. “Just another week for you. And I would’ve been cursed anyway, so it wouldn’t feel so bad.”
“Wait. Wait. Wait.” Kara stops you, looking confused. “You wanted to stay?”
“No!” You think about it for a second. “Not stay. No. Just-you know-If I had perhaps stayed longer then yeah, it would’ve been fun to learn that.”
“You can learn how to use a gun here!” Kara says, and Lena furrows her brows.
“No, she can’t.” She looks at you. “No, you can’t. Maybe when you’re older.”
“Right. Moms wouldn’t let me touch a gun either.”
“We are your moms.” It’s out of Kara’s mouth like she hadn’t given much thought to it. But you know she has, because she looks stung. You’ve noticed how she flinched every time you referred to Regina and Emma as moms, but it’s out of your mouth before you can stop yourself to think about it. For a year that’s what you’ve been saying every day. It’s hard to call them just anything else. Almost disrespectful even. But you don’t want to make Kara and Lena upset, so you have to watch out for that.
You try to say something after that. But it’s like your mind keeps erasing itself. ‘Ok, fine, sorry, sure you are momma!’ are all things that almost make it out of your mouth. Instead, you settle for, “Can I have some M&M pancakes?”
“Sure, babygirl.” Lena gets up and gets behind the counter. You go back to your phone, too embarrassed to look at Kara again. She doesn’t say anything about it either.
You talk about other things. They tell you how crazy it was to find you, and what they did all week while you were gone. Apparently it was mostly crying and blaming themselves for your disappearance.
“Hey, where are you going?”
“To school. To see Jamie and Maya.”
“Where are your glasses?” Kara asks and you touch your face to realize that you haven’t been wearing them at all.
“Ugh.” You grunt and mumble right after. “I hate those stupid glasses. Can’t believe I have to wear them again.”
You run to your bedroom and find an old pair tossed around. Stupid disguise. Stupid glasses. Stupid secret identity.
“Ok. Can I go now?” You ask when you make it back to the living room.
Lena lets out a forced smile out of her lips, and Kara gives you the most awkward thumbs up in history. Well, there’s a lot to unpack there. So maybe leave it for later.
“Hey!”
“No way in hell!” It’s Jamie’s first response when she sees you in front of your old school. “You grew taller in a week?”
“Something like that.” You smile finally looking down on her. Rao, it feels so good to finally be taller than Jamie. You’ve been hearing about it for years! “Hey, babe.”
“Holy fuck, look at you!” Maya says with the biggest smile on her face. “I don’t see you for a week and you show up here looking like a superhero!”
“Well…” You give her a little side flirty smile. “Is that a good thing?”
“You look great, babe.” Maya’s arms go around your neck and she tiptoes to kiss your mouth. You hold her by the waist, making it easier for her to kiss you.
“God, I’ve missed kissing you.” You let out after you part your lips.
“It’s been a week, stop being so melodramatic.” Jamie rolls her eyes, and you smile, letting go of Maya to hug her too.
“I’ve missed you too, dipshit.”
“Oh.” Jamie lets out a surprised sound. “I guess you’re not so dramatic then.”
You want to tell them, right there, about how it was not just a week. About your different life in the past year. But the girls from your school who used to bully you pass right next to you, and your heart beats faster anticipating the teasing.
But they don’t say a thing. In fact, what they say after they pass you, and you catch using your super hearing, is that you must be a new student. You smile, relieved. Getting taller and cutting your hair. You wish you had known it would make your life a lot easier.
“Ice-cream?” You smile at them and get positive responses at that. Two hours with them and it feels like you’ve never left. Feels good to be with them. It makes you remember that even though your life in National City is not always easy, it’s still pretty great. And that you shouldn’t take that for granted.
You and Jamie walk Maya home, and you’re not even scared of her parents' reaction anymore. It’s not like they’ll recognize you, anyway. And later, you fly Jamie back to her house. You say a quick hello to Alex and Kelly, then fly back home.
“Hey.” You throw yourself on the couch between your moms, with a smile on your face. You look at the box of donuts in front of them, just sitting there waiting for you to arrive and your smile grows wider. “Sorry I was gone for a while. But can I make it up to you both with some hugs and forehead kisses?”
“Oh! Me first!” Kara asks and you smile, throwing your arms around her, and resting your chin on her shoulders.
“You’re my mommy. No one will ever take that away from you.” You whisper in her ear, and feel Kara’s body fully relax in your embrace, while she lets out a relieved sigh.
“I love you more than words can explain it, kid.” You smile and let her go a little, just to look into her eyes.
“I know the words.” You rest your forehead against hers and smile. “You’re my heart.”
“You’re my heart, little one.”
“Can I get a sweet moment like this too?” Lena asks and you chuckle, pulling her close for a tight hug.
“You also don’t have to worry about anyone taking your place.” You say softly in her ear. “You carried me inside of you for nine months, and I’ll carry you inside of me for the rest of my life.”
“Oh God.” Lena says, choking up and wetting the back of your t-shirt with her tears. “I swear this is the loveliest thing someone has ever told me.”
“It’s true.” You smile and kiss her forehead right after. “I love you mom.”
“Oh, I love you, babygirl.”
“And we’re stronger together.” You say, and feel their arms go around you at the same time, in a family hug.
Sure you will miss being called ‘honey’ and ‘sweetheart’, but nothing beats being called ‘little one’ and ‘babygirl’. And nothing ever will. National City may not make you feel as good as Storybrooke did, but the people here surely make up for that.
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Omg do you have more cute hcs with the lov and class1a/1b
I dont care how long or short it is, I ABSOLUTELY LOVE READING THEM 💕💕💕💕💖 😊😊
Theyre so comforting <333
YES I HAVE A BUNCH. COME TAKE IT ALL.
Tomura is an expert in video games, right? Well, he's currently working from afar with Hatsume and Melissa to create a VR system to help the kids at UA train.
Everything because the first thing he did when meeting Nezu was telling him the UA system sucked.
No more public exposure, no more simple barriers keeping away the villains from the kids, no more pushing them to dangerous places with no proper supervision.
The new job of the League when it comes to working is the UA is keeping the place as safe as possible and helping the kids recover from the trauma of the war.
Dabi doesn't like working directly with the kids, so his job consist on patrolling around the UA. In case a crisis is reported, he's the first at the place and his job is to keep the crisis on minimum 'til the teachers arrive.
The funniest part is the type of crisis he has solved so far. They include:
Helping people with their crushes because they tried to confess and caused an accident. (Dabi has the fun of his life with it, being honest).
Accidents in the kitchen. (No much he can do except using Shoto as a way of taking down the flames).
Stupid fights (He is banned from helping in those since he cheered for Shoto when he was fistfighting Iida for saying something to Midoriya).
And his favorite: keeping Mineta at bay. Dabi is not the type of gentleman that defends women constantly, because he just doesn't care about helping anyone. But Mineta is a type of gross he would have incinerate in the streets if he was a man and not a kid. So instead, he just walks from a safe distance and keeps scaring the kid when he's about to annoy one of the girls.
Tomura always find Dabi is the halls complaining about the no smoking rule
They make fun of each other a little until they realize they should be working and there are kids staring at them.
Class 1-A talks about Dabi like the older brother who was in jail.
Oh, but Dabi told me...
They are actually well informed about a bunch of stuff and they know how to take care of street criminals better now.
Ah, but they're also the ones who check if he is not drinking too much, if he's having proper rest, if his burns and staples are taken care of, if he's not too anxious or depressed, if hes' taking his meds...
If he's not following one of those, they call Natsuo. Oh man, Natsuo has become the emergency contact of half the League somehow. Maybe because he has a golden heart or maybe because they all are scared of Fuyumi by some weird reason.
Shoto is the other emergency contact when it comes to Dabi, hmmm, but sometimes he just follows Dabi bad example and well.
Dabi is the anti-Santa. He's gonna give you that one gift you wanted but everyone said no because it's dangerous.
"Dabi, I'm trying to make a safer space for the kids" , "Tomura, I'm trying to make them relax".
After getting fired twice by Aizawa, Dabi is finally behaving.
This has nothing to do with the fact that he's finally dating Tomura tho.
WHICH TAKE US TO: SPINNER, THE BROTHER WHO ACTUALLY ACKNOWLEDGES HIS RESPONSIBILITIES.
Spinner works in the same thing as Dabi, but he's the reliable one.
Getting Uraraka down when she starts floating on her sleep, calming people down when they're having anxiety attacks, noting when someone is having a bad day and requesting the teachers to let the person rest...
Spinner is the one actually helping them with their ptsd. He makes everything so easy and pleasant. It's like they're just kids taking classes and having fun.
Besides, class 1-B knows he is amazing at cuddling and people love his hugs. Just by seeing Spinner, they cheer up.
He and Shinso are responsible for the purple hair tendency among the kids of General Studies. Their heroes.
He's also the one who helps the kids with their training sessions when they need a partner but there's no one else to help them.
He became one of the official bus drivers of the school after taking some lessons and requesting a license.
He sings with them while they travel, he always has snacks in case someone is hungry and he has pills in case someone is motion sick. Well, a bunch of pills since Dabi is always motion sick.
He had a crush on Tomura but he realized it was more platonic than anything.
Now now, Tomura and Spinner have matching gamer tattoos that said Player #1 and Player #2. Dumbasses in action.
If Dabi is the problematic uncle and Spinner is the responsible uncle...
That leave us with: Compress the artistic dad and Kurogiri the dad who's always working far away but you can totally rely on.
THE VIDEO CALLS WITH KUROGIRI AND COMPRESS ARE SO CUTE.
101 Flirting with Compress.
All the kids in all courses have a personalized mask. Compress is addicted to creating them.
His beautiful, mischievous kids that once, trying to distract him, stole his prosthesis and kept it going around the school from room to room.
Turns out it was a surprise party, but man if it was fun because Compress pretended the whole time he was a pirate looking for his long buried treasure.
HE GOT A PARROT AND HE NAMED HIM RED BEAK.
Bakugo almost exploded the whole place after hearing such a ridiculous name.
Well, Red Beak loves making fun of Bakugo, repeating everything he says.
RED BEAK AND KIRISHIMA ARE BESTIES. YES YES.
The Bakusquad would kill for Red Beak.
Sero is teaching him Spanish, Mina is teaching him to dance, Denki is teaching him bad jokes and Jirou is teaching him to sing.
Tokoyami is the official protector of Red Beak. Koda is the translator.
On the other hand, Kurogiri always gives them some honey and other things when he visits the school.
He congratulates them on their achievements, he hears them for hours talking about their adventures and he is the old friend you call when it's 3am, you're feeling bad but you don't want to worry no one else.
If you want to solve a problem, call Kurogiri. He's gonna give you the clues but let you solve it yourself.
The award for the dad with more patience goes to: KUROGIRI.
If you really really need to run away from some hours, he can use his quirk to rescue you and he would prepare some tea for you, wrap you in a soft sweater and walk with you through his yard. You can pick flowers or fruit with him until you calm down. Or you can watch old movies with him. Or bake. Being with him is like floating around in the sky, no worries, just clouds and stars and soft noises and lights.
The school always knows when it happens and they are okay with it. Mostly. Just don't do it too much.
Toga is another good option if you need to talk but you don't know with who.
She's actually a great listener and an expert on making things look less stressing than they are. You see, she pays attention at your triggers and moods and if she sees something is bothering the students, she finds a way to distract them immediately, while letting the teachers deal with the problem.
Ah, the queen of gossip.
If you want to know something about someone you need to pay the prize, tho. And she won't even tell you if she considers the secret must be guarded 'til the grave.
She's the one who takes the messages to the parents because she's fast, can hide at plain sight and doesn't put them in danger.
You never know where Toga is. She someone studies like the rest of them, but she's like, selected to secret missions. She has a lot of info but they all trust her somehow.
Maybe is the fact that she would kill and take a stab for you. And that she would never put Deku or Ochaco in danger. Or her family.
She's also Mineta's biggest nightmare.
Try sexualizing the girl and win a terrifying week, courtesy of Toga Himiko.
She won't let you sleep, she won't let you eat, you're gonna wish you were never born. She can make you feel as sexualized, observed and stalked as you make the girls feel. Oh, she's gonna show you exactly how it feels to be a girl.
Also don't sexualize the boys around her either. Stabby queen is not gentle to those who are not gentle with her friends. Period.
Friendly reminder: 0 stabbing accidents since she started studying at UA.
BECAUSE THEY GAVE HER A RUBBER KNIFE.
And finally, the Tomura headcanons.
He's always falling asleep on odd places. The kids have a new name called "let's put a blanket on Tomura".
And then they call Dabi or Spinner to take him somewhere more comfortable.
He's working so hard. He's really working so hard on redeeming himself, even when everyone has already forgiven him. But he has this fear of being a failure or being too much...
The kids are also well trained on how to help him through his anxiety or panic attacks. Even more, some of them have always a pair of gloves in them just in case.
Momo is more than happy to make him more.
It's kinda sad how much he's suffering even now. That's way they all do their best to let him know his doing great.
Kisses in the cheek, compliments on how he's looking, new products to his hair and skin, playing the games he recommends, telling how badass he is when he trains them...
Somehow being around Tomura has help them realize how important is communicating stuff. They all are way healthier now.
Tomura is just... So sincere. He's been instructed to share his thoughts, because he had a problem before with communicating properly. That means he used to forget saying certain information because it was obvious to him, but not to others.
He doesn't mean to hurt people. He's just saying what he thinks. Which also means he offends a bunch of people not by accident. And he doesn't apologize because he is just doing what he's been told.
Midoriya and Shigaraki's discussions are epic. And so are their fights. Yes, they fight like siblings. Which is crazy funny because they are like "friendly reminder you tried to KILL ME" and "WELL YOU DESERVED THAT FOR BEING A DICK".
They've finally found out that you can complain to him or get a little violent and he's not gonna even blink, just hear you out.
It was because Bakugo got a little violent with him and yeah, he just stared back waiting.
You can't imagine Dabi's anger when Tomura told him about Kotaro. He was frustrated because at least Tomura did step on Endeavor and humiliated him for life, but him? He is angry with a man that's dead and gone.
Okay no, the whole League is angry about the things that has happened to the whole League. That's the thing with finally being able to relax and feel. It all comes back in a flood.
They have prohibited being around school when the parents visit. Specially because they are no very civil to shitty parents.
And if a kid confess about having shitty parents, oh boy. The League is gonna BE PISSED.
The UA is still a total chaos, but now in the right ways. They have more normal problems, they don't have to win war and kill evil lords, they complain about not having money to go out and forgetting their homework. And the ex-villians can complain about life being boring a needing more action.
That's a good thing. That means they all are healing, together.
They're gonna be fine.
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amiedala · 3 years
Text
Something More (the mandalorian x reader)
CHAPTER 4: Protectors
Rated: Explicit (we’re FINALLY getting to the actual explicit stuff y’all!)
Warnings: descriptions of violence, mentions of stalking/hunting, descriptions of sexual activity
Summary: “Too bad,” you manage, finally, hoping that your voice doesn’t break, “you protect me, I protect you, give and take, Mando, that’s how this works—”
And then you stop because his hands are on you. So fast. Lightning quick. One grabs at your side, thumb pressing lightly against where your scar bottoms out on the left of your abdomen, the other on the right side of your face, fingers tangled in the mess of your hair. You gasp, shudder, and breathe out as he grabs you. As easily as he squeezes, though, his grip detracts to barely there at all, and he slowly pushes you back against the wall. Every nerve on your body is on fire. You breathe, uneven and desperate, as his grip on your hip trails up your side until he has both big hands cupped against your face.
He’s eclipsing you. All you can see in your line of vision is him, and, peripherally, the distorted reflection of your heaving chest pressed up against the cool beskar, everything swallowed up by him. It’s devastating. It’s everything. You can barely breathe.
You dream about him that night.
Well, you’ve dreamed of him every night. It started when you fell asleep face to face, and now he lives in your head. You think some crucial part of it has been wiped clean simply for the sheer space of memory that’s just him. You don’t even know his name. You don’t know how old he is. You don’t know anything about him except that he’s a Mandalorian, he seems to have had adopted the child, and that he has thrown himself directly in harm’s way for you twice now.
Thoughts like that live on while you sleep. Vibrantly so. Sometimes, the dream changes and you’re on top of him, or those huge hands are inside you, or you hear him gritting out your name through the modulator as he—
Somehow, you always seem to wake up before anything in the dream can finish. It’s maddening, to say the very least. Everything with him seems to overlap until it doesn’t.
It’s been a handful of days since your narrow escape on Coruscant, and both of you have healed from your injuries on the planet’s surface. You haven’t been as close to Mando since you slept face to face that night, his head slipped down on your shoulder. When you had woken in the morning, he was gone, and you frantically searched the entirety of the bottom half of the ship for any trace of him leaving before you heard him playing with the baby up the ladder, and when you ascended into the cockpit, you were back in hyperspace.
You’d been in the air for the most part, only stopping briefly down on planets to refuel and replenish whatever stock of food the three of you needed on the ship. You weren’t sure where you were going next. You don’t even remember asking him where the next planet was, just that you knew you were going somewhere. The two tracking fobs he had left to complete before returning the bounties to the Guild blinked from the dashboard, stuttering out of rhythm ever so slightly. You watched them in the dark, sometimes, when you slept upstairs in the cockpit and tried your best to not let your mind wander to the man sleeping a level below you.
Sometimes, more often than not now, your hands would slip absentmindedly into your pants and you’d find yourself conjuring up the gruffness of the Mandalorian’s voice when you touched yourself. Twice now, you’ve finished to the memory of him saying, “where did he hurt you”, and it’s an instinct so natural you don’t even realize that you’re getting yourself off to the rhythm of his words until you’re done. Once, he climbed the ladder almost immediately after you finished, and you had to wipe the warm slick off your fingers on your pants when he asked you to hold the baby. They’re still stained, and the thought of him noticing it—or walking in on you while you’re in the act—has occupied almost all of your waking hours.
It’s better on ruminating on how narrowly you escaped getting hurt by the thug a few weeks back, or on your mind reliving every single memory of how badly you handled being alone on Coruscant the last time you were there—two thoughts that you tried very hard to push away—until the Mandalorian brings it up, almost a full week later.
“You did good,” he says, and you have no idea what he means. For a split second, you think he’s talking about you touching yourself last night, and you have to stifle a yelp when you ask him what he means. “Back on Coruscant. The ship doesn’t handle easy.”
“Oh,” you say, “thank you. I think the Crest has something against me.”
He doesn’t laugh, but you almost think you’re hearing a lighter voice coming through the modulator. “It’s old.”
“As old as me?”
He looks back at you, and you swear you can feel his gaze locked on you again. “How old are you?”
You swallow. “Twenty-five.”
The Mandalorian keeps his visor on you for a second, and then turns back to the front, focusing on the space you’re hurtling through.
“The ship is older than you,” he confirms.
“Explains why it’s so cranky.”
He looks back at you, and you giggle. A few moments pass, and he says, “so am I.”
You don’t know what you’re supposed to do with that information, quite honestly. Are you supposed to ask him how old he is? Maybe he’s seventy under the armor. Until you saw his stomach back on Coruscant, you often wondered if he looked exactly like the baby under there, or if he was a Quarren or a Gungan or something else entirely alien.
It takes you a minute, but you finally ask, “Are you younger than the ship?”
“No.”
“Are you twice the ship’s age?”
The Mandalorian looks back at you again, and if you weren’t hurtling through hyperspace and the Razor Crest wasn’t mostly running on autopilot, you would have cracked a joke about distracted driving.
“No.”
“But you’re older than the baby,” you joke.
He pauses again. “The kid is fifty.”
“What?” you shriek, and turn, betrayed, to the little green child hovering innocently in his egg next to you. He coos. You look back and forth between them, incredulous, and then a laugh filters out of the modulator.
“I don’t know how he ages. But he’s definitely still a baby.”
“Maker,” you say, still flummoxed. “Baby, you don’t look a day over thirty.” He coos at you, and you grin, folding your knees up to your chest in the chair.
“The kid is older than me,” Mando says, and then all attention is on him again.
“Well,” you manage, “then we’re working with a gap of twenty-five years.”
It seems the conversation is over, and you’ve been preoccupied with the kid, when Mando finally speaks again.
“I don’t know,” he says, and you look at him, curious, confused, “how old I am exactly.”
You’re about to ask what he means when the ship lurches again, and both of you are thrown sideways. You had strapped yourself in this time. You didn’t want a repeat of Coruscant, in any capacity. The way the Crest handled was atrocious. It was an old, cantankerous piece of junk, and it seemed to defy every other order either of you gave it. It also decided to blindside you out of nowhere, which was… well, it was like both your dirty subconscious and your conversations with Mando that teetered on something more, right before you hit the impact. Mando hauled the navigation drive up, and suddenly you were all right side up again.
“What was that?” You manage, blowing rogue hair out of your face.
He pointed. “Asteroid field.”
You squinted out the window. “Where are we?”
The Mandalorian was silent for a minute, and you didn’t push him. You weren’t in any rush for him to leave again, if you were being quite honest with yourself, and were soaking in all the tiny moments of the two of you cohabitating the ship for as long as you possibly could.
“Jakku.”
You hadn’t ever been on Jakku. You knew that it was a dry, hot wasteland like Tatooine, but that all the Rebel connections here had dried up over the years, and it had lots of small outposts where scavengers could bring practically anything dug up from the sand to make a little money. It was also worlds away from Coruscant, which was probably why it had taken so long to get here. Truthfully, it sounded dangerous in ways that you’d always feared the heat for, and your stomach flipped over a little in the recognition that he was probably going to leave again. You had been so spoiled with the last few missions—they had taken hours, and not one had swallowed up a full day, let alone weeks. He had warned you when you first joined that he could be gone for a week if he were tracking someone particularly difficult to locate, and the small sadness that pained in your gut when you barely knew Mando was a blip compared to the wrench you felt whenever he left your line of sight now. Seeing him get hurt, having to pull him back from that—you hated it. You hated knowing that he wasn’t infallible, regardless of that big shiny armor and the combination of his stealth and quickness. You wanted to tell him it, sometimes, that you hated seeing him leave, but there was still that anxious twang that came attached to how deeply you felt every single interaction, how you make things out of nothing, and you don’t think you could take it if he ever rejected you.
“Is the bounty…difficult?”
Mando seems to deliberately not hear your question, and something flares deep inside you, allowing you to pretend his resistance is because he doesn’t want to admit he doesn’t want to leave you, either, but you swallow and try to be patient.
“Not as difficult as the last one.”
“How dangerous is he?”
Mando takes a second with that one, too, and you aren’t prepared for him to turn towards you. His visor pauses on you, just for a moment, and you offer up a half smile. You have no idea if he’s reciprocating under the mask, when he finally answers.
“She’s nothing I can’t handle.”
She? That tiny, betrayed part of your mind screams, and you have to fight the urge to physically kick away your jealousy. He’s hunting her. Hunting her down, whoever she is, and bringing her back to the ship in shackles. Stop it, you chastise yourself, what, do you want him to hunt you down? Get it together.
Yes, your traitorous, primal possessiveness taunts. Yes, you want him to hunt you.
Maker. You were going to have to square up with this needy, animalistic part of yourself the second Mando left. You were going to kick its ass, because this was absolutely ridiculous—you still hadn’t responded to his last comment.
“You’re objectively…better than her, right?”
He looks back at you. “Expand.”
“You aren’t going to get shot again?”
Mando’s gaze fixates on you yet again. You swallow dry air.
“A blaster’s not really her speed.”
What did that mean?
The baby babbles. He’s reaching out his tiny green fingers for the ball that rests, perennially unscrewed, on top of one of the levers. Absentmindedly, Mando pops it off and hands it to him. The baby coos as he plays with it, trying to teethe on its smooth metal surface. You watch him as he finds so much joy from one small object, not paying attention to how quickly the Crest is dropping onto Jakku’s wasteland surface.
You don’t say much. Mando doesn’t say anything. If you try hard, really hard, you can imagine that he’s regretting leaving you and the kid as much as you’re dreading it. You don’t know why you can’t voice any of this out loud. It should be easy, by now, you’ve pretty much become a permanent fixture here. He fell asleep with his head on your shoulder, your fingers intertwined, a few nights ago. He’s offering voluntary information about himself to you now, which is a complete 180 from how stoic in his silence he was when he first brought you on board. He offered up safe delivery out of Nevarro and then refused to let you leave the ship anywhere dangerous. He let you fix a wound on his bare skin—something you know goes against the rumored Mandalorian creed. There’s all these signs, blinking and humming in the back of your mind, that the way you feel around him—something earned, something real, something more—is mutual. You know you attach big stakes to everything, that you think the galaxy has been leaving you signs, when there’s no higher power orienting you to some elevated purpose. But the way the air burns around him, how right you feel with Mando and the baby…you’d bet your life that he felt it too.
Even just a fraction. Even just in the back of his mind.
When you make your landing, the ship stubbornly creaks into the uneven sand, and you’re glad you’re still strapped in. The Crest had it out for you. You loved it in the way you’d love an old house—broken and creaky around the edges, but warm enough to still call home. The Mandalorian didn’t ask you to follow him down the ladder this time, but you did anyway, out of some habit you’re trying to force. The baby toddles around the lower deck as he flings himself to his father’s shoes, and you scrunch up your lips to the side, a sore attempt at mimicking his expression. You can’t ask Mando not to leave. This is his job. You’re lucky he didn’t let you get taken out by either of the men that tried to hurt you, or leave you for dead on Nevarro, or kick you out on Coruscant.
But stars, you want to.
Somehow, he breaks the silence first. “I’ll be back within a few days.”
Your heart sinks. “Days?”
He looks at you, the visor suddenly impenetrable. “She’s dodgy. I’m not expecting to be gone more than three.”
“What if you are?”
Silence swells up in the air around you both. Your amateur handling of the Razor Crest on the last planet was only possible because you barely had to get anywhere. Jakku was huge, and incredibly desolate, and you didn’t trust yourself enough to figure out exactly where Mando was if there was a dire emergency. And he’d never told you what kind of quarry he was tracking before, which gave you a sinking suspicion that he wasn’t confident that he’d come back completely unscathed.
“Here,” he says, finally. His voice is softer through the modulator. He hands you the commlink again, and you wrap it around your wrist, intentional. “Remember—”
“Only for emergencies?” you interrupt, and give him a soft smile. You can be lenient. You can pretend that you won’t be staring at it for days on end, waiting for his deep voice to crackle across the stars to you.
“Good girl.”
He turns, quickly, like ripping off a bandage, which is probably for the best, because you don’t want him to see your knees going weak at his two words, or how that heat he gives you rushed deep down in between your thighs, warm and wet enough to line your underwear. You stand there, mouth open, just gaping at his retreating figure as he walks out into the sand.
The baby pulls at your leg, and it takes you an embarrassingly long time to yank your jaw off the floor and pay attention to him. He’s started begging for lullabies now, with his big bug eyes, and so you oblige, singing past the devastation and tingling that the Mandalorian has left behind in his wake until the kid is finally asleep. You think he does it so much to self-soothe when his daddy leaves, because he’s usually always awake in his presence. You usually don’t like when the little guy fades off when it’s just the two of you, because at least while he’s awake you can talk out loud to him and not feel like you’re going crazy being cooped up inside the ship, but right now…right now, you have other priorities.
You make sure that the kid is sleeping soundly, and you walk up the ladder as quietly as you can, trying to get snug under your blankets in the makeshift bed you’ve made in the corner, and when you finally get yourself comfortable, you play the words good girl over and over again in your mind while you slip your fingers down your pants and into the slick between your legs. You try to picture him in your mind, the way he looks under that mask, his eyes trained on you—what color were they?—and rub tight little circles to the sound of his voice, etched in your memory.
Nothing comes. You can feel it building inside you, that gold rush that sends sparks down your body when you usually orgasm, but right now, it’s like you’re teetering right on the edge. You throw your head back in desperation, in frustration, and you remove your shaking hand for just a second to refocus on him, and when your fingers return to your clit you think this is it, this has to be it—Nothing.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me,” you exclaim, pressing both hands to your eyes as if the stars to explode there instead. You can feel it building, still, even while there’s absolutely nothing in the way, and no matter what happens, you can’t cum.
You’re frustrated. You’re very frustrated. In every version of the word. You huff, yanking up your pants too roughly and pacing around the ship’s dark hull. This is all you’ve wanted for days, this small moment of release, and he just gave you the words to get yourself off by just thinking about it, and…nothing? Really?
You pace and then slide back down the ladder. Maybe you can get outside, just for a few seconds, feel the heat on your face, and maybe that’ll force it to come somewhere else, and you’re tiptoeing past the baby and getting your blaster from the armory, and then you pass the alcove where Mando’s cot is hidden away in, and you’re about to open the airlock—
Wait. Mando’s bed.
Your heart catches in your chest, skips a couple beats. This is not good. This is wrong. This is a horrible, dirty, depraved, very bad idea.
But before you can stop yourself, you’ve pressed your trembling fingers to the button that reveals his bed, and the doors fly open. You throw yourself in quickly, as if that’ll lessen the impact, and you throw yourself down on your back, looking at the ceiling.
It’s so dark in here. It smells like him. It’s like his soap has scrubbed down the bed, the way it’s wafting through the air. In here, it’s like a holding chamber. If you close your eyes hard enough, you can imagine he’s right there with you, his body large and uncloaked of armor, his skin exposed everywhere but the helmet, his hands on your hips while you’re straddling him like you did the other day to patch up his wound, him saying good girl as he moves inside you—
Well. Your fingers didn’t even have to slip back into your pants for you to cum this time.
You bite down on the back of your hand as it ripples through you, your ears absolutely deafened by the way your body vibrates like static. You clap your other hand over the one you’ve sunk your teeth into to simply drown out the sound in hopes that it’ll recede.
It takes probably five minutes. You sit there, in complete darkness, shell-shocked. The embarrassment and the shame you feel of getting off in someone else’s bed doesn’t even compare to the feeling of doing it. Maker, you’re going to bad places when you die. Bad, dark, awful places. The internal chastising you’re trying valiantly to give yourself fades off into the background as you relive it over and over, imagining him telling you you’re a good girl again, back in this bed, wearing considerably less, when he comes back to you. Visions of him telling he’ll never leave you again dance through your head when, suddenly, you fade off into nothing.
  You didn’t mean to fall asleep. You don’t remember doing it.
But you wake up, and you’re still in Mando’s bed. You’ve pulled his blanket up around your shoulders, and it’s rough and tattered compared to yours, but you don’t even care. Your skin easily irritates when it’s against fabric that hurts, but you’ll take on the rash for this. You are so snug, so warm, and then it hits you that you’re sleeping in his bed, the same bed that you came all over last night, and you sit up in a panic.
You check the sheets, and there’s no mess. You haven’t really disturbed the bed at all, really, come to think of it. You lay back down, still groggy with sleep. He said he was going to take a few days. There’s no reason why you couldn’t sleep here tonight, too, maybe you’d even take the baby in here with you—
The baby. You shoot back up in a panic, suddenly completely awake. When you throw open the door, and launch yourself out of the bed, you find him toddling around on the floor, with that little silver ball he loves so much in his adorable stubby fingers.
“Baby.”
He turns to look at you, making noises of recognition when you fall out of his father’s bed, and you pick him up, swinging his tiny green body through the air.
He coos at you, pulling on the blanket that is somehow still around your shoulders. Dank ferrik. That wasn’t supposed to come with you. You gingerly pry it from his grip. He looks at you, back at the blanket that’s been put back into the alcove, and then his big eyes well up and he starts to cry.
“No,” you whisper, and then, louder, “no, it’s okay, baby! You don’t need to cry! I’ll—here, I’ll sing you some nice little tunes, and we can dance—”
At this, he wails even harder, and you wipe away the array of tears with your free hand. He claws towards something, and you pull him into your chest before you realize he wants the blanket. You pull it back out and drape it around his tiny body. “Hey, bug, it’s okay.” You swaddle him the best you can, and then he wipes his tiny nose against the tattered thing, and you try to pull it away before you realize he’s not wiping his nose. He’s sniffing the blanket. The blanket that smells like his dad. And, more recently, you.
“It’s okay,” you say, soothingly, swinging him from side to side, bringing those big eyes in towards the crook of your shoulder. He clings to it, just a little, but it’s enough to know he wants to stay nestled up there. “You miss your daddy, huh, sweetness?”
He coos, muffled, against your neck.
“Me too,” you admit, with no one but the kid and the dark hull of the Crest to hear you.
  Another day passes. Then another. You’re starting to go a little stir crazy. If Jakku didn’t scare you, you would have gone outside and taken the baby for a little walk, but you’re still nervous, jumpy leftovers from the last man who had boarded the ship, not to mention that it’s a desert, foreboding wasteland everywhere you could possibly go. You bring him outside at least once a day, though, not even fully on the ground, just down the gangplank, so that you can both have some fresh air and touch something that isn’t shiny metal or whatever scraps of food you’ve been feeding to you both.
You like the baby. Love him. He rocks. He’s the cutest thing in the entire world. You had sworn off starting a family back when your parents died, because missing them hurt too much and you didn’t want another possibility to make that hurt permanent, but you would sign adoption papers tomorrow if you meant you got to care for the little one forever. His dad was just the bonus, you’d almost convinced yourself, to satiate that hungry, aching, nervous pit in your stomach that grows bigger and bigger every hour Mando’s still not back.
You’ve cleaned the interior of the ship. Three times. Yesterday, you used the fresher twice, simply for the acoustics of that room, so you could sing and pretend you were giving a show at a cantina, and okay, maybe a little bit for the smell of Mando’s soap on your skin.
His bed is much more uncomfortable than the nest you’d been sleeping in on the floor, but it smells like him, and it’s warm, and if you close your eyes and push up against the wall, you can imagine it’s him in the beskar enough to get you to sleep. Worry aside, you’ve slept better the past two nights than you have in what feels like years. It’s partly because you’re imagining he’s there, partly because you know you’re safe in here, and partly because this place feels more like home than any other one you’ve ever belonged to.
You’re starting to get worried, though. You know he insisted that the commlink was only for emergencies, and you didn’t want to distract him on his mission. Or bother him, more likely, the Mandalorian wasn’t a man who got distracted easily, but still, you thought about it. Distracting him. The baby wakes up sometimes, and you pretend to be completely engrossed in attending to his every need, because when he falls asleep or shows more interest in his ball than you, the silence and fear creeps back in.
Another day passes before you’ve gone on long enough without hearing word.
“Hey,” you whisper into the commlink. You’re in his bed. Again. You’re not proud of it, but you can’t pry yourself from it. “I don’t know if you can hear me, but—it’s been four days, and she’s dangerous, and I—the baby misses you.”
You press the button. You hope that’s sufficient. You just sit there, staring at the artificial light in the darkness, tummy flipping over every second that passes where you don’t hear from him.
It’s been full minutes, and you lay back down. You pull his itchy blanket up to your shoulder, huddle on your side. You’ll keep your wrist next to you in sleep, so he can talk in your ear and wake you up if he needs to—
“Are you there?”
His voice is quiet. Through the modulator and the link, you have to strain your ears in the vibrating nothingness to make out the shape of his words.
“I’m here,” you answer. It spills out of you, too fast.
“No emergencies,” he says, and you can feel your cheeks flush with the reprimand before you realize it sounds more like reassurance.
“No emergencies here either,” you manage. “The baby is still as cute as ever. You parked near a good radio station. I’ve been singing to him—”
“Careful,” he warns, and your heartbeat quickens before you can ask what. “The first word that comes out of his mouth is going to be sung, not spoken.”
You giggle, the air cutting through the darkness. “Would that be so bad?”
He’s silent for a minute, and you relax back into his pillow, the commlink pressed up against your face.
“I don’t think I could handle having both of you singing,” he says, and his voice rumbles through you in a way you can’t place until you remember the baby is fifty and hasn’t even spoken his first word yet. The Mandalorian is signing on for years with you, then, maybe full-on decades, maybe for life, with how slowly the kid progresses—you have to bite down on your lip.
“Maybe I’ll shut up when he starts.”
You can hear him shifting. He’s still so quiet. You wonder where he is. You wonder if he’s gotten close to his bounty yet, if she’s anywhere near him—that unfairly jealous part of you roils in your belly, and you push your fist into it as if to shove back the unreasonable thought.
“That’d be a shame,” he finally says.
“Do you like my singing?”
He’s quiet again. You listen through the silence. He speaks so sporadically, it shouldn’t surprise you, but being in anticipation of what comes next is almost as good as the words themselves. “I like your voice.”
Your voice. That could mean anything. That could mean your singing in the shower or the questions you ask him or the way he makes you giggle or the way you’d moan out his name, if you were ever lucky enough to learn it—you realize you haven’t spoken. “I like yours, too.”
He’s quiet. He doesn’t speak again. You know how late it is. “Have you slept?” you ask, quietly, just in case he’s fallen asleep.
“A bit.” You can hear him adjusting. “I’m close to town. I tracked her here.”
You nod, forgetting he can’t see you. “When do you think you’ll be ba—will have completed the mission?” you ask. You bite your lip in the surrounding silence.
“By sunrise,” he says. “You better fall asleep. I want you both awake when I return to the ship.”
Your stomach flips over in excitement, then in dread. “Do I have to hide from her?”
He’s silent. You slide your thumbnail between your teeth, breath bated in anticipation of his answer.
“Just be ready,” he finally says. “Don’t hide unless I tell you to.”
“I’ll anticipate it,” you counter. “I’ll be awake at sunrise.”
“Set an alarm.” His voice is quick, but you can feel the lightness to it. “Or three.”
“I’ll have you know,” you say sleepily, “that I can be wide awake at the first alarm when I need to be—”
“And,” he adds, interrupting you, “stay near my bed in case you do need to hide.”
Before you can say anything in response to that, the link clicks off. You’re in the darkness, again, that swell in your legs, the buzzing in your ears, the excitement in your heart. The last thing you remember before you fall back asleep is, he’s coming home.
  Your name comes from seemingly nowhere, and you jolt up from where you’ve been sleeping. Very comfortably. You wipe sleep from your eyes as you fumble around from the source of it.
It’s the commlink. Of course.
“I’m here,” you manage, through your very groggy morning voice.
“I’m almost back.”
You dig a heel of your hand into your eye before all the moving parts click together in your mind. That’s Mando’s voice, and it must be close to sunrise, because if he’s heading back, he’s definitely got the bounty.
“I—where should I go?”
You don’t hear anything for a long moment, and you hurriedly slide out of his bed, trying to arrange the blanket and pillow in the same formation that it was before you defiled it, and can’t remember enough what it looked like almost five days before but you hope that Mando’s memory has been distracted enough by his hunt that he won’t notice. You find the baby, place him back in his egg, and shake your head firmly when he gives you his big eyes pleading to get down.
“Where are you?”
You sleepily survey your surroundings. “I am against the wall.”
He sighs. “Which wall?”
“The one across from the fresher. Near your bed.” You feel your cheeks flush with that admission, even though he can’t possibly know that you’ve holed up in there since he’s been gone.
“And the baby?”
“He’s beside me.” You pull your gun out, too, and loosely holster it in the belt around your leg. “And I have my blaster.”
“Good,” he says, and no girl follows it, and despite the circumstances, you feel a twang of sadness.
“How close are you?”
The link goes silent. Again. It’s become his modus operandi to just leave you in the lurch, right when you’re on the edge of the conversation, and while it’s hard to get frustrated with him when that pull of sureness inside you is always tuned to the highest frequency, you want to whine about it.
You cut yourself off. Nope. He’s bringing back a bounty. You cannot get distracted, not now, no matter how bad you want him. Not the time. On a whim, you run into the fresher and you splash water on your face, enough to wake you up and keep you alert.
There’s a noise outside the ship, and you immediately push the baby’s floating cradle behind you, fingers on your blaster. You could handle whatever was happening. You actually had your fingers on something tangible, and you were a good shot when it came down to it.
It turns out, the reason why the Mandalorian didn’t tell you how soon he’d be coming back because he was already pretty much there. You tense, then relax upon the first glimpse of the beskar on his helmet you got, and then tens again when the gangplank is lowered down to the hot sand of Jakku.
She…looks dangerous. She’s a Twi’lek. Long, and slim, a very dangerous shade of purple. The first thing you notice isn’t how alien she looks in comparison to the sand around the gangplank, or how she moves with a confident, seductive swagger, but the way her tongue dances in circles around her teeth. Her canines are sharp, pointed, hungry.
You didn’t scare easily. You had worked hundreds of jobs with people who had every intention to double-cross and discard you. You faced off against the intruder on the ship with your only instinct to protect the baby in mind, not your own safety. That’s why Mando had brought you aboard.
But you look at her, and you’re scared. It’s her teeth and the way her eyes lock onto you, immediately, dangerously, like she knows she could intimidate you. And then probably flog you within an inch of your life and leave you for dead. You’d been there before. You knew how it looked.
“What do we have here?” she purrs, turning around to face Mando. He shoves her, once, roughly, and she steps forward so that his blow won’t hit as hard, tongue tracing the outline of her teeth. “You got yourself a little pet.”
Your eyes glance in fear to the baby, but the way he looks back at you makes you realize that she was talking about you, not the kid. You thumb your blaster, stepping forward, trying to remain impervious.
“Hello, there,” she whispers, and you could feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. You didn’t want to look away from her—you can just tell, instinctually, that she could strike instantaneously, just lying in wait for a moment of weakness—but you can’t help it. You look at Mando, hoping your raised eyebrow signals your fear and your level of discomfort, and the way his visor locks on you is enough to know he had calculated the risk and knew he could beat her. His hand is still outstretched, slightly, as she meanders over to you.
“Look, Mando,” she hisses, pointing back and forth between the two of you. Instinctually, you push the baby’s cradle back even further, putting your full hand on your blaster. You glance up at him again, and then catch a flash in the low light of the ship, and realize she’s handcuffed. Even shackled, though, you can see how her sharp teeth glint, how her eyes hold venom you’d never even seen. “Have you taken your helmet off for her yet?”
He stands there. You have absolutely no idea what you were in the middle of, but suddenly, it felt like you were the outsider here, not her. Your stomach flipped over with the possibilities. Had he taken his helmet off for the bounty? Had he betrayed his creed for her? You swallow, grit your teeth, loading your tongue behind them just in case whatever she gave you next could be responded to.
“She’s pretty,” she appraises, tongue finding her canine, and before you can react, she lunges close to your face, close enough that you can feel the hot wash of air, clicking her teeth menacingly right in front of your nose. You don’t jump, but the flinch of closing your eyes felt bad enough. You knew it was the wrong move the second your eyes squeezed shut. “Aw, look at that.” She sniffs. You don’t move. “She scares like a little Ewok, Mando, is that why you keep her locked away on the ship—"
Suddenly, a flash of beskar moves through the air between you two, and the Twi’lek is snapped back, recoiling and hissing at how hard he hit her.
“I don’t need to remind you that I have no issue bringing you in cold.”
You recoil at that, how detached and distorted his voice seems. You know that the modulator evens it out, for the most part, and that you tend to imagine his voice comes out softer and warmer to you than anyone else. But right now? Right now, his voice is stone cold. He sounds murderous. Dangerous. Scary. The kind of threat that scared off the man on Nevarro. The kind of threat that you know he gives to his bounties. The kind of threat he’s never once showed to you.
You swallow.
“I dare you,” the Twi’lek says, and she turns from you, just for a second, to slide up to him. So much of her skin is reflected in the beskar that it’s turning the entirety of the interior of the Crest purple. “Try to kill me. We both know you need me, whether you like it or not, that I’m still the best you’ve ever had—”
Before you can react, before you can do anything, the Mandalorian has a knife against her throat. You have no idea where it comes from. You want to react, to say something, to not sit there bumbling like a faulty droid, but you’ve got nothing. Zip. Zilch. Nada.
“Slice me with my knife,” she whispers, taunting him. “Do it. Put on a show for your little weakling girlfriend behind me and kill me. We both know you can’t—”
You unfreeze, suddenly, so quickly that you don’t realize what you’re doing, until you yank her slender shoulder back away from the knife Mando has in his grip and shove her headfirst into the carbonite chamber. She howls, but you press the button—that’s your one move, slamming your hands against things and miraculously making them work in the moment of truth—and her terrifying, hungry face gets swallowed up in the gas. You shove her backwards—well, the block of her—so that it slams into the other bounties that have been frozen in time in between your last trip to Nevarro, and it’s only when you’re sure she’s completely immobilized that you finally exhale, hands on your knees, chest heaving. The world around you is spinning. You check your arms and throat frantically, just to make sure she didn’t nick you with something sharp while you were frozen.
When your breathing regulates, and all your bumps and bruises only tally up evenly to the ones you had before today, you look up at Mando. He’s seemingly stuck, too, the sharp knife still in his gloved hand, completely immobile. You tap his outstretched hand to be sure you didn’t accidentally catch him with your fairly heroic carbonite rescue, and he only becomes responsive to your touch on his gloved one.
“Hey,” you say, softly, to not startle him anymore, “I’m okay—are you? Are you okay?”
“Thank you,” he says, gruffly, his fingers still clenched tight around the knife that came out of nowhere, and you just know that underneath his glove, his knuckles are white. You can hear it in his voice.
“What—oh. You’re welcome. I’m sorry I didn’t react sooner, that I let her go on like that—”
“I was going to kill her.” Even through the modulator, you can hear there’s something complicating his voice. You move forward, gently, trying to pry his fingers off the knife. Your body is so close to his, your neck straining as you look up from his hand to his helmet. You don’t know why this is so difficult for him to reconcile, when you’ve seen him take out at least twenty people, easily, since you came aboard. You don’t like the killing, but you understand his necessity, sometimes, and his disconnect from it. It’s what he does, it’s his job, his survival. You don’t know why this one was so different. “If you didn’t—I was going to slit her throat.”
You’re the one who’s silent, now. You have absolutely no idea what to say, especially considering that him needing solace over the thought of killing someone—not even actually killing them—is completely foreign to you. You inhale, exhale, and then take a half-step closer, moving his last finger off the knife. “You didn’t,” you whisper, earnest, slipping the knife out of his grip and reaching in closely behind him to put it safely in the armory. “You didn’t.”
He looks at you. Up and down. It’s dark in here, but you can track his visor. You have absolutely no idea what’s going on behind it. Despite all of this, despite the way you had both been moving in sync lately, despite how you felt the magnetic pull of the universe with him, he just went radio silent. None of this seemed in character. For the first time since you met him, you felt like you were in over your head.
“I was going to,” he repeats, and you nod, slowly. “She’s not worth anything to the Guild dead, but I would have done it in a second—”
“—You didn’t,” you interrupt, enunciating each syllable, “it’s okay, you can turn her in frozen like that, and we can get far away from her, you don’t have to be—”
“—to protect you.”
You come to a full stop, breath catching in your throat.
“I would have spilled her guts all over the floor in front of you—in front of my kid—to protect you. And then you protected me instead.”
You can feel your mouth falling open in shock. The baby, funnily enough, has decided to move his floating egg upstairs, and you’re glad he’s getting out of the line of fire. You swallow, looking back at Mando. “I did.”
“That’s not your job.”
You have whiplash. His voice has gone from detached to emotional to brash. You have no idea what you’re supposed to say to that, to say to any of this. You feel a familiar, dizzying rush, the beginnings of tears pinpricking at the corners of your eyes.
“Too bad,” you manage, finally, hoping that your voice doesn’t break, “you protect me, I protect you, give and take, Mando, that’s how this works—”
And then you stop because his hands are on you. So fast. Lightning quick. One grabs at your side, thumb pressing lightly against where your scar bottoms out on the left of your abdomen, the other on the right side of your face, fingers tangled in the mess of your hair. You gasp, shudder, and breathe out as he grabs you. As easily as he squeezes, though, his grip detracts to barely there at all, and he slowly pushes you back against the wall. Every nerve on your body is on fire. You breathe, uneven and desperate, as his grip on your hip trails up your side until he has both big hands cupped against your face.
He’s eclipsing you. All you can see in your line of vision is him, and, peripherally, the distorted reflection of your heaving chest pressed up against the cool beskar, everything swallowed up by him. It’s devastating. It’s everything. You can barely breathe.
“That’s not your job,” he repeats, but now his voice is almost as ragged as yours is, and so you nod.
His helmet comes forward, slightly, and he presses it into your forehead. “What is my job?” you squeak out, trying to not go cross-eyed as you try to catch any glimpse of his eyes under the visor. You can’t, so you close yours, in desperate anticipation.
He removes his helmet from against your forehead, and you sway forward, already missing his grip against you, until, suddenly, his head is in the hollow of your neck. Your breathing hitches again. You try your very best to not imagine what his voice would sound like without the modulator, what his lips would feel like pressed up against your skin, when his hand drops from your chin and trails back down your body, past your scar, past the bruises on your belly, and then it pauses.
“To take mine,” he grits out, his voice swelling up against the skin of your ear, and then your body slumps against the wall, and before you can beg for it, for anything, his hand rises, meeting you in the middle, fingers fitting perfectly between your thighs.
***
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CHAPTER 5 COMING SATURDAY JANUARY 23RD EST!!!! i hope y’all enjoy!!!
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multi-fxndom446 · 3 years
Text
Do you notice?
Mammon X Reader
When I tell you this one was literally haunting me and I couldn’t sleep till I wrote it- it is 4am rn. I guess I’ll see if I still like it tomorrow anyways I hope what I said under this made sense👇🏻👇🏻
If the words look like this it’s what’s currently happening.
If they look like this, it’s mammon’s thoughts.
If they look like this is flashback
~~
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Mammon stood in front of you at a loss for words. He was pacing alone in his bedroom just moments before this before he decided to hype himself up enough to come to you and tell you what he wanted to say. But now, looking at you and how how your confused gaze burned holes into him, he realized maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.
Baby when you sleep do you dream of me?
And when you’re awake, do you think of me?
“I need to know how do you feel?” He had finally gotten out, yet still refused to look you in the eyes. And even with that sentence it wasn’t everything his head was telling him to confess to you.
~
You and mammon were in your room like always yet it somehow felt calmer then usual. Maybe it was the fact Mammon was being oddly silent or that you were just to tired but as you fell asleep next to him, you realized it was because Mammon was focused on helping you rest.
He didn’t want to say anything to distract you from sleep so he stayed quiet. He had seen how tired you were at RAD, how overworked you seemed. So when you all got home and after you ate dinner he made sure you went straight to your room and locked the door so his brothers wouldn’t come in and keep you from the sleep you needed.
He ran his fingers through your hair which was something he knew you enjoyed and watched as it eventually lulled you to sleep. Even when you were asleep he didn’t stop playing with your hair.
His hands were gentle as they carded through the soft strands and he smiled to himself. He almost wondered what you dreamed about, if you ever did dream.
He took the time to admire you, as if he didn’t admire you enough at RAD that same day.
~
“Mammon?”
Before you could continue to ask something else he continued.
“Cause baby when I sleep I dream of you and when I’m awake that’s all I do.” He took a chance to glance at you, you seemed stunned. “Think about every detail you have.”
~
He’d often watch you in class, the way you focused on the lesson or the way you tried not to fall asleep. He never seemed to be able to focus even before you arrived in Devildom but since knowing you it’s gotten worse.
He’d spend most of his time in class admiring you, seeing every detail about you that he already has memorized. He watched with a loving smile as you’d turn to Satan for help or how you’d lean into Asmo to hear what he knew about the other demons in class. Stuff that usually made him jealous, he couldn’t seem to find it in him when he saw how happy you were.
Walking in the halls though if you weren’t walking with him he would definitely be a little disappointed. Especially if you chose to walk with Lucifer instead.
He’d watched with a frown on his face as you listened to whatever his brother had to say, you seemed so invested. Nothing he ever said to you had you this invested.
He almost turned to walk away in his fit when you saw him in the corner of your eye and you turned to him, giving him the most loving smile and immediately he melted.
He really could never get you out of his head.
~
Do you notice when I get mad, I clench my jaw?
Do you notice when I get sad, I tend to fall?
“Do you look at my words I say to you?”
~
Sometimes Mammon would wonder if you picked up on small details about him, details that’d he’d know about you.
He wondered if you ever noticed what he did whenever he got nervous, or jealous or mad. He was wondering that now as he watched you joke around with Beel and he clenched his jaw in anger.
He seemed to keep it that way for longer then he’d thought because next thing he knew you were in front of him, cupping his jaw and immediately he relaxed.
“You okay?” You asked him and he could only find it in him to nod but you looked down at his hands to see him starting to crack his knuckles, something he did when he was anxious.
So you smiled softly and brought both of your hands to his to hold them still. He stared at you wide eyed as you kissed his knuckles softly before you were pulled away by Levi to go play a new video game.
~
“Cause I notice when you get mad, you close your eyes and I notice when you are sad you let out sighs.” He looked to the floor again before quietly saying, “I need to know, are those sighs ever over me?”
You were on your last straw and Mammon could tell. His brothers all had been bugging you all week over different things, getting mad at the others for trying to steal you away and you were caught in the middle of there annoying bickering.
He noticed you close your eyes in anger. Something you did to try and stop yourself from yelling or arguing.
“Oi! Leave y/n alone!” Mammon started to shoo them away, “shes had a long day you can hang out later.”
When they all looked towards you they realized for once Mammon was right and all of them begrudgingly walked away.
He sat next to you on the couch in silence, noticing you start to play with your fingers. A thing he noticed you did when you got overwhelmed or nervous. But he also knew if you kept playing with them, they’d become raw from how much you rubbed them.
So quietly he put his hand in your lap and immediately your fingers went to play with his and twist his rings to distract yourself.
He glanced at you from the corner of his eye to see you let out a sigh and his heart ached. He wondered if he ever overwhelmed you like his brothers did.
~
Finally he looked you in your eyes as you stared at him with confusion. You seemed stunned, at a loss for words for what you were hearing. He was losing it, his words weren’t being clear, or not as clear as he wanted them to be.
So he decided to blurt out what he came to say to you in the first place. “Do you know how in love with you, I am?” He held his hands up to his chest, “do you see how in love with you, I am?” He clutched his shirt in desperation for the words to get through to you, “everything that you do it makes my heart stop.”
Oh it stops
“So baby when you sleep, do you think of me?” He seemed to calm down but he seemed almost sad to you now.
His hands dropped to his sides and once again he refused to look at anything but the floor. Almost expecting you to slam your door in his face.
“Mammon,” immediately his head shot up when he heard the crack in your voice and he felt guilt course through him when he saw tears in your eyes.
“What-?! I didn’t mean to make ya cry! Wait y/n I’m sorry! I didn’t mean-“ but before he could finish his sentence you lunged at him, wrapping your arms around his neck. He slowly wrapped his around your waist, scared this was some kind of dream.
You laughed through a relieved sob, “I’m in love with you too!” His eyes widened before his own tears came to his eyes and he hid his face in your neck.
“Of course you do.” You could only laugh before pulling away from him to wipe away the tears on his face and he did the same for you.
“See how easy that was?” You teased and his face flushed red as he muttered ‘shut up’ before cupping your jaw and leaning down to connect your lips.
It was a short kiss, one to basically confirm that this was real and that this was happening and when you kissed him back he felt his heart do flips.
When you pulled away you leaned your head against his and his fingers went to twirl the ends of your hair, “I love you Mammon.” You whispered softly
“I love you too y/n.
~~~
83 notes · View notes
mimisempai · 3 years
Text
Home is where our story begins
Summary:
Mobius and Loki will finally move in together, will the cohabitation be as natural as the rest of their story?
Notes:
Still not having the real name of Hunter B-15 and the story taking place post canon, I found it odd to keep calling it that. But I didn't want to invent a name for hher, so I chose HB, if Marvel were to give him a name later, I would change it here of course.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/32628412
2871 words - Rating G
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"So, soon the big day? I hope you're happy about it, even if it's new for you."
Mobius sipped his Josta, wondering what the best answer was. Yes seemed too restrictive, but it wasn't as if he wanted to go into details about his new living arrangements with Loki. Yes, he was happy to move in with Loki, of course, but...
"Mobius?"
"I'm... cautiously optimistic. You know me."
HB nodded. "For you, it's practically effusive." Chuckling, she took another pretzel. "I'm happy for you and Loki." Her smile faded briefly, "If our variant condition has taught me anything, it's to take happiness where it lies. I'm glad you decided to give your relationship with Loki a chance."
"There was nothing to decide because everything happens naturally between us," Mobius mumbled.
HB frowned. "Hm?"
Mobius cleared his throat. "It's nothing. I've talked too much."
"Talked too much?" HB laughed. "When it comes to explaining the logic of a mission strategy that sounds crazy, yes you could be accused of talking too much, but when it comes to your personal life... but I understand what you mean and to me who has been watching you a bit since the beginning of this relationship, it is clear that things are natural between you. Although I am curious about one thing."
"Which one?" Mobius prepared himself.
"How will you manage living together, as you both have your single habits, not to mention your lifestyles which were rather... different".
This question kept going round and round in Mobius' head. He was ready to compromise, but he wasn't going to change who he was either. With the personalities they both had, it might seem insurmountable from the outside, but Mobius had a deep conviction that it could work.
"I guess we'll see as we go along," he replied confidently.
"You know where to find me if you need to talk."
The friendship he had formed with HB, was one of the surprises that had come with Loki's arrival in his life.
Before they were just colleagues who worked well together and had the same dedication to the TVA and now having shared the same experience of losing everything, a real friendship was born.
"Thank you. But let's stop talking about me, how's it going with the new recruits and training?"
The TVA, purged of old influences, had returned to its primary function: to monitor realities across the multiverse and attempt to reduce temporal interference as much as possible. Mobius was the leader. Loki, Hunter B-15, now HB and other agents formed the core team.
They had completely restructured the organization, recruitment and training.
"Well, there are several young recruits who are promising, and I must say Mobius, that Loki is not only a very good teacher but also very well liked."Loki had volunteered on his own to handle the training of the newbies on the field.
Mobius, however, was not surprised at his success. As he had told LOki in the early days, he could be anyone he wanted.
Once HB left, the afternoon passed without surprise for Mobius, who was eager to get home. He found it hard to concentrate, looking forward to the changes that were coming.
**********
Loki was waiting in Mobius' living room when Mobius returned home.
"Mobius!" he exclaimed happily as he stood up and walked over to Mobius to kiss him. Mobius thought he wouldn't mind this kind of action if it became part of their routine in the future.
As is often the case when they haven't seen each other in a while, things heated up quickly between them and they were both panting when they parted.
"How was your day? HB told me she told you about my work? Is everything okay?"
That, too, was something nice -even if he found it annoying at first, this talkie-talkie thing, this incessant stream of words from Loki. He had realized that Loki's questions were always sincere, his lover expected answers and never asked them out of politeness.
"A lot of paperwork as you can imagine, I miss working in the field, fortunately once this is over I will be able to accompany you again and see the excellent work you provide with my eyes, if I believe what HB told me", Mobius said quietly while pushing aside a strand of Loki's hair that was falling on his forehead. "What about you? How was your lunch with Casey?"
Another unexpected relationship, for who knew Loki. He had formed a bond with Casey, an ordinary administrative employee. Loki had told Mobius that it was nice to have a friend whose reactions he didn't have to weigh, because Casey was spontaneous and naturally trusting.
"Fun. He's excited for us, well for me because I'm going to live with the great Mobius." Loki chuckled before continuing, "I expected the opposite, but you're his idol, I'm just the god of mischief who taught him what a fish was."
Mobius raised an eyebrow. "Really?"
"Yes, I swear." Loki smiled. "He even offered to help us move our stuff in once the apartment was ready."
Mobius shook his head. "He's really supportive."
"Absolutely," Loki smiled, "He always surprises me with his candor."
Loki pulled Mobius to the couch and sat him down. Then he lay down in his favorite position, with his head on Mobius' lap. Mobius, as always, couldn't resist the impulse to put his hand on Loki's silky black hair and began to stroke it gently. In response, Loki made a sound that closely resembled a purr.
**********
Turning his head to Mobius, Loki asked, "Are you really happy that we live together?"
"Of course Loki," Mobius murmured as he ran his hands through Loki's hair, enjoying sliding the strands between his fingers. "I am, but you know it won't necessarily be easy right?"
"Hmm." Loki nodded and smiled sheepishly. "I know I'm not easy to deal with."
"Hey Sweetheart! That's not it at all." Mobius protested. "I just think we're from two different worlds and it's going to take a little adjustment and patience."
Loki nodded.
"Besides, we're going to be together a lot. Between work and home," Mobius said.
"Yeah." Loki looked up and smiled at Mobius. "This is going to be great!"
"We'll see," Mobius said, finally realizing that it wasn't he who was afraid of being disappointed, but that he was afraid of disappointing Loki.
After a few moments of silence, he decided to put his fears aside and enjoy the moment.
"Now, have you thought about what you want for dinner?"
"No." Loki pressed himself against Mobius, "But I know what I want for dessert."
"What a coincidence," Mobius muttered as he slipped his hand under Loki's shirt, "I think we both have the same idea.
These kinds of little moments between them, these little habits, made Mobius think that maybe he didn't need to be anxious about their future shared life.
**********
A few days later, Mobius was up to his neck in paperwork and couldn't take it anymore. He threw his pen away and leaned back on his chair.
"Mobius?"
"I'm here."
When Loki entered and saw the state Mobius was in, he locked the door behind him. He walked up behind Mobius, put his arms around his neck and kissed the top of his head. Mobius leaned back even more and closed his eyes.
"It's going to be hard to keep working if you make a habit of doing this," he whispered.
Loki's hands slid over Mobius' shoulders and he began a firm massage. "How about this?"
Mobius sighed, "It's not good for concentration either... " as Loki's skilled fingers had encountered a particularly knotted muscle.
"Oh, is that so?" Loki rhythmically pressed his thumbs into the back of Mobius' neck and it felt so good that Mobius moaned, "It doesn't seem to bother you that much."
"You and your distracting hands mustn't be around too often," Mobius said, "or I'll never be able to work properly, a massage like this, on the other hand, is... effective. I didn't know you knew how to give massages." Mobius was always happy to learn new things about Loki.
At Loki's silence, Mobius turned his head and was surprised by the sad expression on his face.
"Loki?"
"Um... this is something my mom used to do for me and my brother..."
"Oh Loki... I'm sorry." Mobius reached for the hand that had remained on his shoulder and squeezed it.
"I miss her..."
"I know, sweetheart, believe me, I know." replied Mobius gently.
After a moment of silence, Loki kissed Mobius' head again, "Sorry, I didn't mean to distract you. It's just so nice and strange to have you just a few steps away from me all the time."
"Why strange?" Mobius turned in his chair to look at him.
Loki shrugged, "I usually store all the things I want to tell you later in my memory, but now that we're in our new home, and we both work together a lot, I feel like I have access to you all the time and it's..."
"Different."
"Yeah. And tempting. And distracting." Loki licked his lips. "I want to see you all the time, not just talk to you, if you know what I mean..."
"Yes, I know exactly what you mean" Mobius cleared his throat, fighting the mental images that Loki's words evoked. "However, I think we're going to have to set some rules, no matter how nice it is, we're both still at work."
Loki nodded, "Yes, we really should, if only for my sanity." He bit his lower lip, and when Mobius saw him do it, he thought that it wasn't just for Loki's sanity that some rules had to be set.
"Maybe later, if you want Mobius? Or tomorrow?"
"Why tomorrow?" Mobius raised an eyebrow. "Why not now?"
Loki smiled "Because I'm excited now, and you're tired of paperwork and I think you need a good distraction."
Mobius rolled his eyes "You're insatiable."
Loki pretended to walk away, saying, "I can leave, I wouldn't want to distract you from your duty..."
Mobius grabbed him and pulled him against him. "You think you can light a flame and not blow it out?!"
"And what about rules and work?" asked Loki, raising an eyebrow.
"That can wait until tomorrow." replied Mobius, pulling Loki's head to his and silencing him in the most effective way he knew how.
**********
For some time, Mobius had been catching scrutinizing glances from the recruits, some even giggling after running into him.
"I feel like they're staring at me," Mobius said one night as he sat on the couch with Loki in their usual position.
"You can't blame them for being curious. After all, the God of mischief and the famous Agent Mobius, we're legends. And also... um... I may have been showing off a bit for a moment or two about your... prowess. Nothing graphic, just little details," he hastened to add when Mobius' mouth opened.
"Little details," Mobius repeated.
"Oh, but nothing, just that I'm satisfied, that's all."
Hiding his face in his hands, Mobius groaned, "Loki, tell me you didn't discuss our sex life in front of your students!".
"Uh... you want me to lie?"
"Loki!"
"Mobius, people think I'm not mature enough for you. That you're too serious and I'm not enough, that you have more integrity and I don't. Personally, I don't care what other people think. But I want people to know that you are as good to me as I am to you."
"And that requires you to tell them the intimate details of our sex lives..." Mobius mumbled.
"No, no, you don't understand," Loki said, clearly struggling to express himself. "I tell them little things that humanize us. That you like my cooking, that you like jet skiing, that I think you're sexy in the morning when you wake up, nothing too intimate..."
"Only in the morning when you wake up?!"
Count on Mobius to have kept only this part of Loki's answer.
"Even sexier than usual."
"Aaaah, that's the reason for these morning quickies," Mobius replied.
"You don't like it?"
"That's not the point, Loki."
"I know what the point is. The point is, I just want people to know the real you. Let them see you the way I see you."
"And for that, you have to tell them we screw every morning?"
"It was just one time, and it was Casey's fault. He said he didn't picture you as a sex beast."
"It gets better and better."
"Mobiuuuuus. I didn't say anything more than what I just told you, I promised! Now they know why we're perfect together."
"Because I give you satisfying orgasms when I'm barely awake."
"Because you're brilliant, and caring, and yes, incredibly sexy."
Lifting Mobius' hand to his lips, Loki kissed his fingertips and whispered, "And because I love you."
Just like that, Mobius' irritation disappeared. He took Loki's face in his hands and ran his thumb over his lower lip. "And I feel the same way. But Loki, I also wish you wouldn't talk too much about our intimacy, even with your closest friends."
Loki replied with his most mischievous smile, "You think I want to tell them how perfectly your lips fit my mmph."
Mobius had just closed Loki's mouth with a kiss and after that, Loki wasn't articulate enough to list Mobius' bedroom qualities and Mobius unapologetically left his book aside.
After all, it was important that he lived up to his reputation.
**********
"You're looking fine, Mobius. I guess everything is okay with you and Loki? I feel like the cohabitation is going great," HB said as she walked into his office.
Nodding his head, Mobius couldn't help but smirk, "Everything is going very smoothly, yes."
"Clearly." HB smiled. "You look... satisfied."
Mobius' eyes narrowed.
"However, given the bags under your eyes, may I recommend that you rest tonight?"
Mobius widened his smile. "I'm sure I'll rest... someday, even if it's not tonight. As I told you before, Loki can be... enthusiastic, and we're enjoying a bit of a second honeymoon right now."
Chuckling, HB shook his head. "And like I said, enjoy the moment. Even the enthusiasm of youth is wearing off."
"Indeed, it is." He paused before continuing, "Do you need anything?"
"Do I need a reason to visit a friend?" asks HB.
"No, of course not. I even enjoy our little early week dates. You know I like talking with you. After all, you and I have pretty much the same background. We've done well."
HB nodded, "Yes. You're right, but I admit I also stopped by because I need you to validate the latest new recruit evaluations."
Mobius chuckled, "I'll look at those afterwards, and send them to you when I'm done."
"Take your time, you can return them to me next week.
They chatted about various things, then HB got up to leave.
"I'm going to start reading these evaluations, unless my insatiable partner decides to show up...I'd hate to disappoint him you know...."
HB shook his head. "Lovely. And since I'll see you Monday to pick them up, You can give me all the details then. Don't let him tire you out too much!"
"That' s not up to me..." Mobius said, and smiling he pulled the first evaluation toward him. He raised his head and looked at the door, aware of a presence in the room.
Loki, standing in the doorway, was grinning from ear to ear.
"Aha! So it's not just me. You do it too!"
Mobius raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"
Reaching up to him, Loki touched Mobius' chest with his index finger.
"You also tell your friends intimate details about our relationship!"
"I certainly don't."
"Oh, I think you do. I just heard HB teasing you about my 'youthful enthusiasm' and telling you to rest because you look tired." Loki's eyes danced with joy.
"I-" Mobius sighed, "Okay, I guess I told her a couple of things about our life together - Hmph!"
Loki threw his arms around Mobius and kissed him deeply. Mobius, surprised at first, put his hand on his cheek, answered the kiss with the same passion, carding his fingers in Loki's hair. Once things calmed down, they parted, breathless.
"What was that for?" asked Mobius, tucking a strand of hair behind Loki's ear in a gesture so familiar now.
"You're talking about me to people, bragging about me." Loki's eyes glowed. "That means you're proud to be with me."
Mobius blinked. "Of course I am. How can you doubt it?"
Loki pressed another kiss to Mobius' mouth. "You can be quite a hard man to read sometimes."
"Not at all," Mobius whispered, as he gently patted Loki's butt. "I'm an open book."
"You are..." laughing, Loki rolled his eyes. "You're not at all." His expression softened as he looked Mobius in the eye. "But I think I can read you."
"You're the only one who can do it," Mobius acknowledged softly.
He wondered how long it would take Loki to see in his eyes the infinite love he had for him, and if he would be able to surprise him with the ring he had in his pocket.
________
Whole series of one shot here : Together, for all time, always
As always, bear with me as it is not beta'd I hope you enjoyed it 🥰
22 notes · View notes
cabinofimagines · 3 years
Text
Connor’s ABCs
A/N: The boy is back -Danny
Request: In that case can I request Connor ABCs??? I didn't see your other fics of him so ill go read them now 👀 // Hey I love ur blog and I was hoping u do a stoll brothers (separate) abcs please ❤️
Words: 1,129
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Activities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?
He tries to have his camp duties aligned with yours so you can spend more time together! Although it tends to be a bit distracting, and it takes you longer to finish lmao
Watching youtube videos or listening to music is also great.
Beauty - What do they admire in their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?
I think he really likes the fact that you call him out on his bullshit lmao he admires your bravery, he also loves your eyes.
Comfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?
His mind goes straight to the food stuff, he’s got you covered, any sweets, any junk food u want, he’s got it. There’s nothing like healing your heart with them quality snacks.
Dreams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?
He wants to travel the world with you. So much to see and so little time to enjoy it, he’ll make sure the rest of your life is one huge adventure
Equal - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?
It’s a relationship that doesn’t need a lead, you two work together in everything, there’s nothing you guys don’t talk before making an important decision.
Fight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?
Connor is stubborn af, he won’t give in and he won’t let you walk away from the argument, it can last for hours. He is a bit childish when he gets mad, he sulks and pouts and ignores you until he cools down, then he silently looks for you, he has a hard time being the bigger person, but he has a good heart.
Gratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?
Sometimes he takes things for granted when he’s too comfortable, but if you ever ask for recognition he gives the world to you, be patient. He’s a bit dumb sometimes but he really wants to give you the best of the best.
Honesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?
Connor shares everything unless it’s a silly practical joke he wants to pull, then you have to watch your back and start planning a way to get back at him. 
Inspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?
He’s definitely more mature after you two started dating, less impulsive as well. You’re starting to like practical jokes and stupid puns but that’s not necessarily a good thing you should be careful with that
Jealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?
Oh yeah, but only bc he’s very aware of his shortcomings. He knows others could be way better matches for you, but he won’t admit it to anyone, only you. He usually tries to outdo himself so he impresses you, it usually pays off. 
Kiss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?
He was a bit clumsy at first, but he’s a fast learner.
Love Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?
It was the first time the campers saw him act all anxious and shy, biggest simp ever and that’s very valid.
Memory - What’s their favourite memory together?
The first time you told him ‘I love you’ because then it was your time to look anxious and shy.
Nicknames - What do they call their s/o?
Probably cheesy annoying names he knows you despise, he’s still a little shit at heart so, understandable. It’s all ironic until he’s using them without even being aware of it lmao
On Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?
It’s really transparent, but he knows how to hide it from his crush, at least up until he decided it was time to be honest. After that he’s very honest about what he feels all the time. He’s all silly smiles and ‘you’re so cute’ every five minutes.
PDA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?
He brags BIG TIME, everyone collectively groans and walks away when he starts.
Quirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.
He’s really good with languages and knows how to tell you how much he loves you in six different ways. He also teaches you how to do it bc that’s cool
Romance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?
He’s really creative! Very romantic as well, would adapt his ideas to your liking.
Support - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?
He’s supportive, honestly your significant other should alway be supportive, if not then DUMP THEIR ASS
Thrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice up your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?
He loves the thrill and adrenaline that comes with adventure, routines are a solid no for this guy.
Understanding - How well do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?
The empathy comes a bit short, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t know how to make you feel better, he only needs to know your ways and your likes and dislikes and then he’s all ready to be your perfect comfort.
Value - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?
The most important thing hands down. He has you right there above everything.
Wild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.
He likes to throw you surprise birthday parties, you have to be careful during the week prior your birthday bc you don’t know when will your friends jump on you when you enter a room.
XOXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?
Big fan of hugs and kisses, will spoil you with both if you let him.
Yearning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?
Becomes very quiet and somber. You make sure to send him voice notes or iris calls so he doesn’t completely turns into a sad vegetable.
Zeal - are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?
Controversial but he would sacrifice the world in order to save you. 
Taglist:   @beneaththeiceandsnow,  @bandshirts-andbooks
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infernalrevenge · 3 years
Text
I’ll Cover You, My Love
Fandom: Choices - Foreign Affairs
Pairing: Ayna Seth x M!MC (Magnus Quezon)
Rating: T (for some self-deprecating stuff)
Summary: Ayna feels guilty about Magnus taking the brunt of the scandal, but he is having none of her negative talk.
Notes: Ayna betrayal plotline? Who's that? Never heard of her. That never happened. I don't know what you're talking about. Anyway, here's a comfort fic for my favorite TA, because I will not take any Ayna slander, not even from Ayna herself. I would just like to say that before I locked in my scandal partner, I had such a hard time picking between Ayna and Blaine, but I went with the latter for maximum drama. Doesn’t mean I still can’t ship my current MC with Ayna though, because I can do what I want. I hope y’all enjoy!
Also hi, I know you asked to be tagged in this :P @robintora
----------
Ayna leaned against her hand propped up on her desk, the words on the paper she was reading starting to blur as she tried her best to stay awake. Ever since she saw the front page cover of the stupid tabloid and Magnus had been the talk of the proverbial town, she hadn’t been able to get a good night's rest as she was wracked with anger and guilt.
Anger at the people who have passed judgement on him so quickly, who decided they knew exactly what kind of person he was based on one stupid picture and the speculations not just on the company he kept, but also on his character...
...and guilt for not being there to take the fall with him. A part of her kept wondering what might have happened if she didn’t get the chance to cover her face the way she did that night. Another part wondered what would have happened if she had just come forward earlier, but Magnus quickly shot the idea down. He explained to her that it was for the best, that he wanted to protect her from the scrutiny.
"You don't have an entire PR team that can spin the story around or make sure it gets buried. This won't just ruin your image -- if you lose your job because of this, it could ruin your life. Please don't say anything to anyone. Let me do this for you, I can handle it," he told her the last time they talked in person. She knew he was just trying to reassure her, but even she can see through the sadness and stress in his eyes, despite the smile he gave then.
At the moment, she simply was not in the best state of mind, and adding to the pile the other things she had going on in her life... she was damn near close to bursting. She was just about to take another sip of coffee, desperate to stay awake, when she heard a knock on her office door. "Come in."
In popped up a familiar head of fiery red hair, his eyes seeming to dart around cautiously before realizing she was alone. A bright smile shone on his face as he came in, waving off to someone from behind the door.
"Magnus, what are you doing here?" Ayna yelped in surprise, standing up.
"I came to see you," he said like it was the most obvious thing, slowly closing the door behind him to make minimal sound.
"What, w-what if someone saw you? Someone might've tailed you o-or people might get suspicious--"
"Hey, don't worry," Magnus stepped toward her, laying his hand on top of hers. "If anyone saw me, they might just think I needed to talk to you about something -- you're also my academic advisor, after all. Plus, Tatum checked and not many other people are out there. I told him to take a short walk so people won't suspect that I’m here for too long."
"Yeah, but we need to be more careful still, I don't want you to--"
"Ayna, I promise I've got it covered, okay?" He squeezed her hand in his, and laid the other one on top. "Just trust me."
She looked up at him, sighing wearily as she let her shoulders relax and sat back down. The young man offered a smile of reassurance, taking a seat from across her desk and carrying it over to the other side to sit next to her. “So, how’ve you been?”
“Honestly? Not great,” she replied, leaning back as she glanced at her laptop screen, multiple windows and tabs opened. “This manuscript isn’t exactly easy to write,” she added with a chuckle. Working on it had been her way of distracting herself from other problems recently, but it wasn’t entirely successful. Her mind had still been brewing with “what-ifs” -- it was much easier to be told not to worry than to actually do it. But she didn’t want to dwell on herself for too long.
“What about you, though? I know the last few weeks have been...” she trailed off, looking down as she was unsure.
“It hasn’t been all bad. I did get Joaquin, after all.” Ah yes, that lynx he got at the pet store during that live interview. Ayna had tuned into it then, and she remembered her fists clenching when the host brought up the scandal unprompted. She almost wished she could have told off that nosy woman to keep out of his personal life, but the way he was able to take back control of it was quite an admirable sight.
“You wanna see pictures?” He excitedly brought out his phone, leaning closer to show her the whole album he had dedicated to the small feline.
“You’ve had him for all of two weeks and you’ve already taken, what, a hundred pictures?” She couldn’t help the amused laugh that escaped her, listening to him coo at nearly every photo he swept through -- some of Joaquin jumping around, some playing with toys, and even some with Dionne in the frame. She had to admit, the combination of the adorable pictures and the equally adorable sight of him describing each one did help lift her spirits a little.
“I can’t help being a proud papa now,” he said, stopping on the picture of the one he took of Joaquin’s first day in the suite. “He’s been helpful in... distracting me, I guess. He somehow just knows what I’m feeling, coming in to comfort me at the right time. The break from reality is always welcome.”
Magnus looked at the woman, noting how her eyebrows furrowed and the frown she wore as he talked about his experience. “Sounds like you might need a break too.”
“This dissertation isn’t gonna finish itself.”
“You know that’s not what I mean, Ayna.”
Guess he managed to learn a thing or two from the lynx then.
“I know you said not to worry about it, that you’d handle it, but...” she sighed, shrinking into herself as she avoided his gaze. “I can’t help it when it’s about you. I can’t even imagine what you’re going through, having thousands of eyes watching you, like they’re waiting for you to slip up.”
The Rutherlandian reached around and wrapped an arm on her shoulders, pulling her closer. “It’s not really anything I haven’t dealt with before. In a way, I’ve kinda gotten used to it.”
“But a scandal of this proportion? That... that has to be different,” she replied, trying to allow herself to lean into him, but not feeling like she deserved his comfort. “It’s not just people waiting for you to mess up now, because they already think you have and they want to watch the whole downward spiral.”
Magnus knew she had been feeling guilty over not getting to step forward and take part of the “blame” (if one could even call it that), but he had no idea how much this was eating at her.
“I can’t help but feel awful that you’ve become the target of such harassment. It wasn’t even your fault! And your mother shouldn’t blame you for everything either, you’re just living your life!”
“Ayna--”
“And here I am. I’m not the one being swarmed by paparazzi and having personal details of my life picked at, but I’m the one who’s stressed and anxious about it. God, how fucking selfish is it of me, feeling sorry for myself when you’re the one dealing with it all. It’s stupid of me to just--”
Ayna felt her face turned up, a gentle yet firm hand cupping her cheek as she met another pair of brown eyes. Anything else she might have wanted to say died off as they looked at each other, but she felt grounded by the way his thumb caressed her cheek.
“You don’t have to feel bad for worrying about me. I love that you care,” he said softly, a small smile playing on his lips. “But it’s not your fault either. What happened already happened, we can’t change that.”
I still wish I could.
The teacher’s assistant let out a shaky breath, leaning into his touch as she brought her hand up to cover his. “I... don’t deserve you, Magnus.”
“No, no, don’t say that. You are kind and beautiful, and you just have-- you have such pure intentions. I know you want to weather the storm with me on this, but I’m doing this for both our sakes. I want you to come out of this safe. Even if they did somehow know it was you, I’d still be keeping you out of it. You shouldn’t have to go through what I do.”
She shook her head, her eyes starting to look glassy as she took in his words. She wanted to believe what he was saying about her, but it was so hard. She didn’t know how he could see those things in her, especially now, vulnerable as she was. She could feel her throat start to choke up, but she spoke anyway. “I wish you didn’t have to... go through it alone. This... this isn’t worth it.” I’m not worth it.
“It is worth it, because you are absolutely worth going through this for.” He started to brush away the tears that rolled down her cheek, before digging into his pockets to find a handkerchief.
“And I’m not going through this alone. I still have you here with me,” he patted her face dry gently, wanting to let her absorb the meaning of his words. He wanted her to know that he meant every word -- that he was sincere in his feelings for her. “Even if you’re not out there with me, knowing that you have my back helps give me the strength to get through another day.”
His patient reassurance lightened the burden inside, if only a little. He knew it wouldn’t be so easy to get her to believe it all, but he would make her see it someday, no matter how long it took.
“I care about you so much, Ayna. You mean more to me than you know.”
Even though it didn’t fully relieve her of the heaviness, those words struck her in a way that helped pull her out of her head. For the first time since the day started, she smiled. A genuine, loving smile through her tears, from knowing that the person she adored so deeply felt the same way about her. If earlier her heart ached with sadness and guilt, now it ached with affection and love for him.
“I care about you too, Magnus,” she said with a sniffle, clearing her throat as it came out rather soft and high-pitched. “I care about you so, so much. I just kinda wish... I could, like, smack away every paparazzo trying to get near you right now.”
Magnus laughed at her exclamation. Sure, he expected that kind of outburst from his friend Blaine, but from Ayna? It was both amusing and endearing.
“Well when we become public, maybe you could. Tatum might even help you with that,” he replied, giving her the handkerchief.
A simple word gave her pause, making her look up at him again, a hopeful glint in her eyes. “When?”
“Well yeah. I... I really like you, Ayna. And I’m not just saying that, I really do. I was kinda hoping that, one day, when things are more, uh, quiet, we could actually be... you know, like, together together.” If his arm wasn’t around her then, he would have been wringing his hands together out of nerves. Was it too soon to bring up that kind of talk? Too soon for them? What if he just jumped into this? He hadn’t even considered if she wanted a relationship yet. Wait wait, he should backtrack--
Ayna pushed forward to kiss him, hands cupping his face as she kept him close. It didn’t take long for Magnus to fall into it, returning it just as eagerly. He could practically feel her smiling against him, a light and fluttering sensation filling his stomach. After a few moments in bliss, they slowly pulled apart, a wide smile on both their faces.
“I would love to be together together with you,” she teased, earning an exasperated sigh from the First Son.
“I get the feeling you’re not gonna let me live that down, huh?”
She only laughed in response, pecking him quickly on the lips again. “Thank you for everything so far, Magnus. I hope I didn’t seem ungrateful for your protection.”
“Not at all, don’t give me that talk.” He rested his forehead onto hers, his gaze turning soft. “You know I’d do anything for you.”
Her thumb gently caressed his cheek, smiling fondly at him. “Would you... let me meet Joaquin some time?”
Needless to say, he said yes.
.
.
.
(The next time Magnus visited her, he came in with an odd lump tucked in the front of his hoodie.
“You know, when I asked to meet Joaquin, I didn’t mean you had to sneak him into my office.”
“...do you want me to go then?”
“No, show me the kitten.”)
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sword-brainrot · 3 years
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Oh, um! May I request a matchup? I know these can be draining to do so feel free to skip me if you want!!
So, um hi! Im a 19 yo translation student! Everyone uses she/her when talking to me, but you can use whatever you like, I dont mind pronouns! Im really shy and kinda anxious when talking to people, but I'm completely see-through ;; cant tell a lie to save my life haha Im super curious abt practically anything and I love to learn new things! When I have to get work done, I make sure it looks shiny and perfect! (even tough I procastinate on it until there's almost no time left,,,,) I prefer indoors because loud sounds make me somewhat panicky??;;;; and in my free time I play games, learn useless stuff and sleep... y'know, the usual ^^;
As for what I'd like in a parter.... I want someone who cares about me ;; I know it may be a bit too much but I guess I can dream right? :') As for myself,,,, idk id be a completely mess ;; Im good at listening I think! but when it comes to affection Im at a loss and I just get embarrassed,,,, I blush at everything and when Im put in a spot I try to laugh it off ;;
Um, also... Im sure you already noticed but I have some self issues so you may want to take this into consideration???? maybe???? Im sorry I had to bring this up;;; i tought it could help you get a better picture of myself haha???? uuu;; (um also i apologize for this huge wall of text, i know its all over the place.... dont know how to organize it;;;;)
Oh, and I don't care about sword types nor I have a preference! I love all the slashy boys equally ♡
Thank you for taking the time to read this, I really appreciate it 💖💖
Oh I would never skip your request! If I ever get drained, I would take a small break. I wanna do your requests dear! Feel free to request as much as you want, I have a blast whenever I can write and make someone smile because of it. Don't worry about bothering me or anything, seeing requests always makes me smile and excited to write 💖🌺
I Match You With...
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🌸 Ishikirimaru 🌸
♡  Ishikirimaru is a very calm and friendly guy, he would understand very well how scary social interaction can be for some people. He would never push you too far and make sure he knows your limits. He would offer you to have tea with him or help him clean just so you both can bond together and let you know what he does want to be around you. He doesn't mind if you don't talk much because you are shy! Ishikirimaru doesn't talk too much in general but doesn't mind starting the conversation and having a short discussion about things that may interest you or your thoughts on things.
♡  Don't worry about ever making him angry or annoyed, it is very hard to do that. He is very easy going and cares a lot about other people. The only way he would ever get actually angry at you is if you say something insensitive about how people's lives in war don't matter or something along those lines. He was a sword kept in a temple that often got prayed to for healing the warriors who came back from battle with deadly wounds. That is the only thing that would actually get under his skin. He cares a lot about the people around him and even the people he doesn't know, he prays for all of their well beings. Even yours. He cares about you a lot as well and will tell you often that you matter to everyone. He is aware that you would never say something to upset him on purpose. As long as the two of you talk it out and apologize to each other, he will forget it even happened. He wouldn't let one slip of the tongue to ruin the relationship.
♡  He tries hard to make sure he never upsets anyone and thinks over his words carefully, but even he makes mistakes and words don't come out how they planned. He will make the most effort to apologize and make sure his words didn't hurt you badly. If they did, he would spend hours on end talking it out and making sure you know that he would never mean anything that would hurt you. He cares about you a lot and your smile is his favorite.
♡  Ishikirimaru might be a little pushy when you talk badly about yourself. He loves everything about you and it hurts him when you think you are lesser than everyone. He will often try to stop you before you go too far with talking down upon yourself and give you plenty of compliments, even if they embarrass you. He wants you to know that you are deserving of love and that you are much better than you give yourself credit for. You have your own talents and people cherish you for being you. They want you in their life because you are you.
♡  "Aruji, I haven't been human long but I understand that being human is a complicated task. The mind can be a cruel one and the deadliest thing to our souls. My words may not mean much but please trust me when I say that you like you for you. You will see things you do not like about yourself because you are stuck with yourself constantly so you will pick up things that others will not. We are all hard on ourselves. Life is even worse on us. So take a deep breath and let yourself receive a little kindness. You deserve it. You give out so much to everyone so you need to know that it is okay to love things about yourself and be proud of who you are. You will make mistakes and not everyone will be your friend but that is okay, because you are human and you have your own life. Surround yourself with people that will love and appreciate you for who you are now. I love and appreciate you for who you are, aruji. So.. Don't be so hard on yourself, alright? It hurts my fragile heart when I see you beat yourself up for small mistakes. It's okay to stumble at times, just get up again... okay? I'll lend you my hand as well."
♡  As you can tell, Ishikirimaru is a very good listener. His whole life as a sword was to listen to those of the pained and give guidance. Even if he couldn't exactly do that in his sword form, he can do that now! He will listen to everything you have to say. Don't be shy to ramble to him. He will give you a happy smile as he listens. Tell him about the things that make you happy, what make you angry, what makes you laugh, and what makes you sad. Ishikirimaru will be right by your side, offering tea and a shoulder if you need it. You aren't alone and he will make sure you know that you don't have to face these thoughts alone.
♡  Just as how you are see through and can't lie, Ishikirimaru has a similar issue. He has a very hard time ever lying and chooses to never lie. The only time he will lie is if it is to protect others. He will often put himself in the painful position in missions so others don't have to face the hardship. He tries to not do it often because he knows that people care about him and he doesn't have to face things alone, but he would rather not see anyone sad if he can help it!
♡  He finds your embarrassed face the cutest thing in the world. Don't be scared to tell him to stop if the compliments become too much for you to handle! He will laugh it off and apologize for going too far with his comments. As stated above, he doesn't lie. So just know that every compliment he gives you is a very sincere comment that he means with his whole heart. Ishikirimaru doesn't need much affection, as long as you show that you simply care about him, he is happy. He would like to hold your hand from time to time but otherwise, he wouldn't force you to do anything you don't wish to do. Go at your own pace in the relationship, he won't rush you!
♡  Ishikirimaru will tell you anything you wish to learn! He might not have a library of knowledge of the past due to being stuck in a shrine for most of his life but he had also studied and learned about the history he came from. If you take an interest in his prayers and religion, he would gladly tell you all the tales he is aware of and teach you the cleansing sermon he often does to give positive spiritual energy. It is something that brings him peace of mind and makes him happy to talk about, so if you are willing to learn about what makes him who he is today and what makes him happy, he would be overjoyed to share all his knowledge to you.
♡  He understands very well the appeal of getting work done to the best of your ability and making it look the best you can. He wouldn't label himself a perfectionist but he does want to do the best he can. Often with cleaning. You will often see him stuck in a room all day because he wants to make sure it is spotless before he comes out and continues work else where. Though... by the time he is done... It is dinner time. Perhaps the two of you could work together and get work done to the point you are both happy with it.
♡  Ishikirimaru is also someone who happens to stay inside for the most part. The only time he goes outside would be to enjoy tea in the sun or if he has to work the field/horse keeping. Ishikirimaru is a very soft spoken and gentle man so you don't have to worry about him every raising his voice and scaring you. If there is ever a loud noise, whether it is other swords or a storm outside, he will gently hold your hand and try to calm you down. He will assure you that it's okay to not like loud noises but he will make sure that nothing hurts you. He will even try to lead you away to somewhere that may be a little more quiet. Giving you a distraction to get your mind off the noise. He wants nothing more than you to feel comfortable and safe.
♡  Depending on the game, he may want to play with you! He tends to like card games even though he is very easy to read and often loses. He tends to laugh about it after when he realizes that he was accidentally showing his hand every time he set down his cards to get a sip of tea. If it's video games, he would prefer to just watch you play and talk to you while you enjoy the game. He isn't the biggest fan but still enjoys to watch! Ishikirimaru is a pretty good teacher! So if you wish to study with him, he would be flattered that you wished to study with him out of everyone. He is very understanding that some material is hard to memorize out of no where. He would just softly correct you and tell you to work on it a little more. He rewards you with sweets every time you do really well on any test he gives you to test how much you remember.
♡  Ishikirimaru would be the most understanding and gentle partner. He wants nothing more than you being comfortable and happy. He would work hard on you slowly forgiving yourself when you make a mistake and love yourself a little more. He would never give up on you and be there if you ever needed.
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nellie-elizabeth · 3 years
Text
Grey's Anatomy: It's All Too Much (17x08)
I don't know... this one kind of just rolled right over me. Not in a bad way, not in a good.
Cons:
DeLuca's death is stupid, and the legacy of it here is still stupid. They had so much they could have done with his character, and now having everyone go through their tepid, repetitive grief routine is just tiresome. They gave most of the grieving material to Teddy, who I hate, and to Bailey, who I love, but I don't really like the response they gave her. She decides to order an autopsy and do an M&M about DeLuca's death to make sure no mistakes were made, but Richard tells her she's causing harm to the living, that no mistakes were made. It was just a tragedy. I don't know... does this seem like something Bailey would do? It felt like a more transparent excuse than usual, to have two characters standing in a room yelling at each other.                                                
And Teddy, with that whole thing where she keeps glimpsing DeLuca all over the place? It's really annoying and why would I connect with her grief over the loss of Andrew? There are other characters who I wanted to spend more time with. This was emphasized at the end when we had the memorial and we didn't get to hear what people were actually saying about DeLuca, because honestly most of these characters didn't have a personal connection with him... and the ones who did, didn't have a lot of screen time to deal with it. Then we end with Owen carrying Teddy home at the end... and the trailer showing a Teddy-centric episode next week... gah. No THANK you. I don't LIKE you, Teddy. Sorry not sorry.
The pacing was... strange during Link and Amelia's argument scene. I can't tell if I'm supposed to be worried about Link's drinking. Do I want to do a whole alcoholism story-line with him? No, no I don't. Link and Amelia are like a safe haven of more relatable stress on this show for me this season. I'm hopeful that this story is just about the stresses and conflicts that come from their situation, and that they'll weather the storm as always. They seem to show that in their last scene, but I don't know... I just didn't like their fight scene.
Pros:
Schmitt is my favorite. His speech to Bailey about how he feels like a bad Jew but how the ceremonies and traditions are really helpful to him... that was so sweet. I loved his moments with Nico in this episode too, where we got this acknowledgment that the problems in their relationship stemmed a lot from Nico's numbness. Then there's that moment during the memorial where Nico initiates a hand-hold. I'm so back and forth with these two. Ultimately I want Nico to pay a bit for his poor treatment of Levi... but they're showing that he's softened, that he is acknowledging his poor behavior in some small way... I don't know. I just want Levi to be happy.
So, the memorial was kind of a miss for me. Sure, I got misty-eyed whenever the camera focused on Carina, and when Andrew's interview video popped up there were a few tears. But overall the music and the sad panning camera over everyone's faces... it just didn't quite land for me. It's the smaller moments, really, that worked in terms of highlighting the grief, and for that we should turn to Maggie.
Maggie didn't have a ton of screen-time in this episode, but she made me cry twice. The first was at the beginning, when Winston (Maggie's bf, I finally learned his name!) is dancing with the kids to distract them from Maggie and Amelia having a moment. About DeLuca, and about Meredith still being so sick. Maggie is sitting on the chair crying while the kids are goofing off with Winston, and it was so poignant. The second was towards the end, when Helm admits that she had no compassion for DeLuca when he got sick, and now she's feeling so guilty, and she just wants the touch of another person. Maggie tells her to stand up and turn around, and then they just stand there, back to back, touching but not breathing on each other, and Helm allows herself to cry. So good.
I love Jo, I love her giggly, hysterical way of processing grief. I love the scene of her, Link, and Jackson just sitting around and drinking and complaining about their various woes. I'm not really on board the Jackson/Jo train because I think it's kind of lazy to pair them up, but I do think they have a natural, easy chemistry that reminds me of how much I've liked Jackson as a character over the years. Same thing goes for Maggie and Winston. Man, Jackson and Maggie really did just drag the worst out of each other, didn't they? I'm happy they're no longer together!
And then we've got Meredith. She's on the beach, deciding whether to live or die or whatnot. Derek is there again. Hearing Derek talk about Ellis was really heartwarming. I mean, it's always kind of hilarious how little the characters in Grey's are actually around for their children, but they have really tried to step up the importance of the children this season. I love that Zola is becoming more of a character in her own right, and even though we don't see much of Bailey or Ellis, their presence is certainly felt. Apparently Zola writes letters to her dad in her journal! And Ellis is the serious one, so much like her mom. Just... excuse me while I weep! And then you have Hayes coming in to talk to Meredith where she lays in bed, still on the ventilator, and he's encouraging her to wake up for the sake of her children. Meredith is anxious about Derek, but he says not to worry, that he'll be right there when she needs him.
Like, all this afterlife/seeing dead character stuff... it's undeniably incredibly cheesy. It's also... really working for me, not gonna lie. I'm enjoying seeing Meredith get this weird, unconventional peace. She's fought so hard to be content with her life, and I want her to wake up and keep living it.
That's all for now! It's still bullshit that DeLuca is dead. I'm pissed about it. And I'm already preemptively frustrated by the Teddy-centric mess we're getting next week. But all in all, this episode was perfectly alright.
7.5/10
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