#some of you have already seen this but i'm posting it anyway bc i love it and maybe posting it will inspire me to write more of this fic | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rkvriki · 1 month

Text

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ enhypen obliviously in love

hi.......lmfao i keep disappearing i swear i'm alive but my isnpo has been going down the drain but i got this cute lil idea also to take a break of all the smutty things i've been posting lolz... anyways hope you enjoy this one !

make sure to leave feedback and reblog! my requests are closed and my talk box is always open so lets talk!

WARNINGS ! none really i think?? this is just not my best work im sorry </3 word count: 1.9k a/n: sorry that some of them, mainly hee's, are smaller than others, my brain isn't functioning and i had a writer's block during this and if it's not goo it's bc i quite forced myself to write this bc i wanted to post sth :(

୨୧ LEE HEESEUNG ! - trying to hold your hand and failing

you and heeseung met through mutual friends in your first year of college and you became almost inseparable ever since then. in the beginning of it, you would only be together when the whole group was, but as time went by and you both started feeling more than just platonic feelings you two started hanging out alone as well. it was usual for heeseung to walk you to your apartment after classes and today was no different. you two walked side by side, the sun almost setting behind you. it was mostly quiet except for the background chatting and the small talk you two would make about something you saw. you could feel heeseung’s hand brushing against yours from time to time and you were internally cursing him out for not holding your hand already. after a few moments of silence, you heard heeseung sigh as he gained courage to hold your hand. his hand got closer to yours but- oh! a light post came between you two. needless to say heeseung was a blushing mess while you laughed at him.

୨୧ PARK JONGSEONG ! - confronting you about it

anyone had to be really blind to not notice the romantic connection there was between you and jay. it was so obvious you were both in love with each other, it was almost painful how one of the sides didn’t notice. that side being you. it’s not like you didn’t like jay romantically, because you do. a lot. but you felt like he just saw you as a best friend he tends to protect a lot. jay didn’t really show it, but he gets really frustrated when he tries to make a move on you in a subtle way, only for you to put him in the friend zone, but it’s all unintentional. every time someone tells you “jay totally likes you.” you’re quick to dismiss them because he would never see you like that. even though you’re the one saying it, it breaks you inside. until one day, you’re both in a diner, sharing fries and a milkshake and you can see jay fidgeting nervously and bouncing his leg repeatedly. “you’re restless, what’s going on?” you ask him, worried. jay sighs heavily and props his elbows on the table, staring at you with a serious expression. “look, i don’t know if i should just give up, because at this point you have to be pretending not to know.” he says “T-to know what?” he laughs at that. “that i like you, dummy.”

୨୧ SIM JAEYUN ! - tries to kiss you and fails

as childhood friends you and jake were always expected to end up dating by your fellow family members. you would always brush off any comments about you two (deep down you wish they were true) while jake just smiled like a fool while looking at you. it was no surprise when jake told his friends he liked you. it wasn’t hard to notice how he felt about you, seen the way he looks at you with glimmering eyes as he took in every word you say. he has never really tried to hide how he felt about you. he wasn’t ashamed of it and couldn’t wait for the moment you realized he liked you, because deep down he knew you felt like him too. it’s funny to him how he’s always making flirty comments and giving you kind of romantic presents and still you just thought he was playing his role as your best friend. but still, even though it was all funny and entertaining to watch, jake was tired of waiting and he decided to just directly show you how he feels. so that’s how you find yourself sitting in the park bench with him as layla plays around. jake takes a quiet deep breath as his hand comes up to brush your hair from your face, making you face him. he takes that as an opportunity to lean down. you, thinking he was gonna whisper something, turned your face to the side, making him bump his head against you. he starts laughing at you, making you confused. “you can’t really see it, can you?”

୨୧ PARK SUNGHOON ! - misunderstanding gone right ?

no one who knew you two understood how in hell you and sunghoon weren’t a couple. it was so obvious you both liked each other but still none of you seemed to do anything about it. you two were your class’s representatives so you two were almost always together and it wasn’t too hard to notice the lingering touches or stares you shared. but something the other students didn’t know was that you two had actually talked about your “feelings”. one day sunghoon almost overheard you telling your friend you liked him. “you like me?” he had asked “no! no, i don’t like you, sunghoon.” you answered trying to play it off. he nodded, his lips pursing. “good, then because i’m in love with someone else.”. it was something along those lines and you two had never talked about it again, but the tension never left. it felt heavy on you and it was painful to spend time alone with sunghoon so you settled that you were gonna tell him the truth. “remember that day you asked me if i liked you?” he hummed as he stopped in his tracks. “well, i lied. i like you, actually. i don’t want things to get awkward because you don’t feel the same but i needed to be honest.” his eyes widened as he stared at you like you were crazy. “are you kidding me? i only said i didn’t like you because you said you didn’t like me.” you gasped and pointed an accusing finger at him “why did you lie then? you said you were in love-” “hey! don’t put the blame on me now you lied too.” “well, we still can fix it right?” you said laughing making him do the same.

୨୧ KIM SUNOO ! - “PFT! who would ever like me?”

you and sunoo weren’t the closest people ever but you two spent a lot of time together since pretty much all of your friends were mutual. still, that fact didn’t stop you from developing a silly crush on him that quickly turned into something more serious the more you got to know him in the very few times the two of you were left alone after a group hangout. no one knew about it except for your best friend. you never told sunoo, not because you were afraid of rejection or him being rude because with how sweet his personality is, he would’ve rejected you in such a friendly manner it would make you think he’s reciprocating the feelings, but because no one like him would ever like you, he was way out of your league. so, confessing was definitely out of question, no matter how much your best friend would insist you would simply not do it. but in reality, it wasn’t really like that. one day you were hanging out with sunoo and your best friend at a cat cafe when suddenly in the conversation you said something along the words of “who would ever like?” and bold sunoo, was not afraid to hide his sincere feelings and answered with “i do.” he smiled while you looked up blushing furiously. your best friend laughing maniacally. “w-what?” sunoo chuckled at your reaction. “i thought i made it quite obvious that i liked you, silly.” oh! who would’ve guessed!

୨୧ YANG JUNGWON ! - heard you liked “someone else”

you and jungwon had met each other in sophomore year of highschool and it was safe to say there was a connection instantly that was more than just a platonic one. you two quickly became attached at the hip. if jungwon said he was going somewhere it was sure that you would be here two, if you were being invited somewhere they could already expect the “can jungwon come along?” question, and vice-versa. it wasn’t strange when people came up to either you or him and asked if you were dating each other and it honestly shocked everyone when you both would always answer no to it, even your own girlfriends found your “friendship” strange. they did not find the idea of a boy-girl friendship weird or impossible to exist but they just couldn’t see your dynamic as friends so it was bound for them to question you. you heard the question so many times you decided to just tell them “fine! yes, i like him so, what?” you saw their shocked faces but they weren’t looking at you. you looked behind you seeing jungwon behind you. when you locked eyes he was quick to turn his back and walk away making you panic. a few days have gone by after that and you decided you needed to talk to him. “i’m sorry i didn’t tell you sooner. i didn’t want things to get ruined by this.” jungwon stared at you “who even is tha guy?” he asked making you look at him as if he had three heads. “what?” you asked “what what?” “jungwon the guy is literally you, i thought that was settled already.” jungwon stayed silent before laughing like a maniac. “if you’re here to make fun of me you can-” jungwon shut you off with a kiss, making you relaize where things went wrong.

୨୧ NISHIMURA RIKI ! - i don’t even know how to word this one

let’s settle one thing. you two knew you both liked each other. romantically. you just don’t bother on labelling it or directly showing it to each other. everyone around you found your dynamic honestly weird but to you two it was more simple than people put it to be. it all started when you were really oblivious about ni-ki’s feelings for you so he decided to hint that he liked you more than a friend. like one time you were walking to his house and he just shoot “you look cute.” but you didn’t quite hear what he said, distracted by a dog “what did you say?” he sighed “i said you look like a fruit.” “riki that does not make sense, but whatever you say.” and he started gradually getting bolder. “i can’t get this song out of my head.” you told him during class “i can’t get you out of my head.” oh! that was new information for you “thanks…?” at this point you were acting dumb for him and he couldn’t take it anymore so he got even more straightforward. during one of your daily walks you were rambling about a flower you saw on the way and he just let you talk as his hand sneakily grabbed yours, making you stop talking and falter in your steps “what?” he asked as if it was nothing “n-nothing!” he smiled as he kept walking along with you. after that day he noticed a change. a good one. and that’s when he realized you had realized so he decided to just get to the point “is it weird if i kiss you?” he asked when you were eating lunch in the school garden. you put your drink down and turned to look at him. “honestly, riki? yes. do i care? no.” so with that he grabbed your face, kissing you as he smiled against your lips.

1K notes · View notes

highvern · 7 months

Text

Lucky Me

Pairing: Kim Mingyu x fem reader

Genre: idiots in love, fluff, established relationship

Warnings: sickening sweet tooth rotting fluff, kissing, tears, brief mention of illness, in this lore Seungchoel is a married man and off the proverbial streets

Length: ~1.4k

Note: Drunk Goggles couple's first L-word! post Discovery by like a few weeks lmao. I'm actually crying in the club bc Mingyu is my ENXJ kindred spirit so i wrote this in the most self serving way possible lol

read more here

“Can’t believe you’re not picking up your phone right now. Really selfish of you. What if I was dying in the street and you didn’t know because you ignored my call? What then, huh? Your poor boyfriend just wants to talk to you but I guess you hate me now.”

You chuckle at the sound of your Mingyu’s scolding. Always one for dramatics, that one. Toweling off your hair, you move to tidy the discarded packaging from the decorations you spent hanging all afternoon. Mingyu’s voicemail plays through the speaker of your phone on the counter as you work to clean up before people start arriving.

“Anyways! I picked up the cake for the party tonight, and some more snacks and beer just in case. The lady at the bakery said the cake took her all morning because the picture I sent of Jihyo kept making her laugh. Hate to say it but I think you have some competition. I can already see us getting married and being her sugar baby.”

Everytime an old lady even compliments Mingyu he tells you to watch your back because they want to steal him from you. Your eyes roll at his comments but they humor you nonetheless.

“She’s nowhere near as pretty as you though, so she's gonna need to step up her game. Alright, I’m gonna stop at my place to shower and grab some clothes and then I’ll head your way. Text me if I need to get anything else on my way, okay? Love you, bye!”

You freeze, plastic bags and towel dropping to the floor with a wet thud.

“Shit.”

You hear his faint curse through the speaker as the voicemail ends.

Heart squeezing as you replay his words over and over, you plop down on your butt to the hard wooden floor. Love you, bye! Love you, love you, love…

He loves me.

Oh boy.

The new information is magical, twisting your insides in knots as you think of all the times you’ve wanted to say those very words you’ve buried in your chest over and over. The times he makes you laugh so hard you think you might pee your pants, his own giggles pulling him to the ground; when he cleaned out space in his dresser for your stuff, buying duplicates of your toiletries so you could come over whenever you wanted and feel at home; when your car broke down on the side of the road and he came to pick you up, racing across town in the dark of night to get you; when Wonwoo told you he’d never seen Mingyu so happy since you’d started dating; the time he cried when Seungcheol recited his vows to his now wife; how he always pulls a extra mug out of the cabinet when he makes his morning coffee, leaving it next to the machine with a sweet note for when you get up.

I love him.

Oh boy, indeed.

Standing, you grab your phone from the counter. Mingyu called almost an hour ago meaning he will be at your apartment any second. You use the few minutes you have left to calm your breathing, praying your hands stop shaking and the blush you feel dissipates as you open the freezer and pludge your face into the cold air.

A clunky knock at the door startles you. Sprinting to unlock it, you nearly fly face first into the door knob in your haste.

On the other side is your boyfriend, thick waves of stress palpable as they roll off his body. Mingyu’s hands are full with groceries so you snag the cake, planting a quick kiss on his chin in greeting.

“Hi,” he mumbles, fear evident on his face.

“Hi!” You beam, dazzling smile thrown over your shoulder as you walk back toward the kitchen.

“Ugh, did you get my message?”

Mingyu pauses to kick off his shoes by the door, nervousness firing through every fiber of his being. He meant what he said on the phone, but you've only been dating for a few months and he doesn’t want to mess anything up by being over eager. Correction: he can’t mess this up; he’s certain the heartbreak would kill him.

Mingyu prides himself on all the times he’s reigned in those three little words from slipping past his lips. Whenever he’s drunk and sees you smile, whenever he’s sober and sees you smile; when you cried about your shitty boss; when he cried at Seungcheol’s wedding, imagination running rampent; every morning when he wakes up next to you and every night before falling asleep in the same place; when you took care of him when he had the flu a few weeks ago; the first time he saw the new toothbrush you bought him to keep at your place, sitting in the cup on bathroom sink right next to yours. The list is endless.

He can’t help that he’s built to love so deeply; his friends, his family, all of the important people in his life have their own space carved in his heart including you. Even before you started dating he cared for you. Your name has been branded in his chest since day one and inferno has only grown as his fondness expands with each moment.

“Yeah, I did. Sorry I missed your call, I was in the shower.”

“It's okay! I just know you like to be kept updated.”

After placing Jihyo’s birthday cake safely in the fridge, you turn to face your boyfriend. He looks like he might actually throw up, hands shaking as he unpacks the bags he’s brought in and eyes refusing to look in your direction. You can tell Mingyu is watching you out of his peripheral, waiting for you to comment on his confession with bated breath.

You stride around the kitchen island to stand next to him, helping sort the different treats he bought in silence. The juxtaposition between you two is almost laughable. You’re all shy smiles and flushed cheeks, unable to control the wild thump of your heart; while Mingyu looks like he might sprint out the door and into traffic at the drop of a hat.

Once all the bags are discarded, food lining the counter to be prepped, you turn to rest your back against the edge of the cool marble, your soft gaze focuses on his face. Arms crossing in front of you, you watch as he pretends to be busy to avoid meeting your eyes.

“I love you too.” You confess shyly, sides of your mouth quirking upwards.

Mingyu’s head shoots up so fast you’re afraid he might give himself whiplash. All you can do is smile demurely, embarrassed by the way he stares at you with wide eyes and an open mouth.

“Really?”

Biting your lip to control the grin attempting to split your face in half, you nod gently.

Next thing you know you’re consumed in a tight embrace, squashed into his chest as he squeezes you so hard you might explode. The smell of his cologne and laundry detergent waft of his shirt, soothing your own nerves as you relax in his hold. You can hear his heart racing in his chest, thundering below your ear; your own echoing in response.

“Say it again.” Mingyu sighs into your hair.

You can’t help but laugh.

“I love you.”

“Oh my god.” He gasps.

“Say it back.” you pout, chin digging into his pec as you peer up at him.

For a second, all Mingyu can do is stare at you, face soft with emotion, eyes cataloging your features. In his wildest dreams, he never thought he’d be fortunate enough to feel this way about another person. How lucky is he that the person he loves loves him too?

“I love you. I love you. I love you.” He says, hands moving to cup your face as he emphasizes a different word with each repetition, tip of his nose rubbing against the side of your own.

“Baby, are you crying?”

“I can’t help it! I love you! And you love me!” He wails, pushing his face into your cheek. “I think I’m gonna faint.”

“Aww, Gyu!” You coo, turning your head to kiss away his tears as they fall.

Mingyu catches your lips with his, needing to show you how much he cares for you rather than just tell you.

But one more time doesn’t hurt.

“I love you.”

#svt x reader #kim mingyu x reader #mingyu smut #svthub #kim mingyu #seventeen smut #kim mingyu smut #🫡 highvern #svt #dghe couple #svt smut #svt fluff #mingyu fluff #kim mingyu fluff

531 notes · View notes

kitskiis · 1 month

Text

The most kills each player has gotten on another person in the life series (excluding real life smp)

Someone has probably already made this before but I've never seen it so I made this mainly for my own convenience but I'm posting it here anyway. Some of these kills are technicalities (and others were also excluded bc of technicalities) so some numbers on this list are debatable but I tried to make it as accurate as possible

Scott: Joel - 7 (Ngl I laughed. The entire reason I made this list was for this statistic I wish more people acknowledged how comically violent scott's retaliations are against Joel's antics sometimes. Literal tom and jerry moment)

Joel: Cleo - 6 (really surprising actually. I've watched all of Joel's povs like twice and have never realized how often he killed Cleo)

Grian: Scar - 5 Jimmy - 6? (one kill is questionable due to it being the warden kill in SL so if anyone should be credited its Etho, which is why I'm still including Scar on this list)

Scar: Etho - 6

Etho: Scar - 5 (worlds healthiest father son duo)

Martyn: Tango - 4 (this number + how much their characters clash make me think these 2 would have an incredible alliance. and by incredible I mean it would crash and burn and I would love every second of it)

Pearl: Cleo - 4

Impulse: Pearl - 3

Ren: Cleo - 3

Bdubs: Impulse, Grian, Skizz - 2

Gem: Scott & Pearl - 2 (Technically also Etho if including LimL)

Skizz: Bdubs - 2

Bigb: Scott - 2

Jimmy: Lizzie - 2 (you could probably make some kind of canary narrative out of this but I'm kind of a vocal hater of the 'the curse got passed on to lizzie' concept so I'm not gonna be the one to do it)

Cleo: Scott - 2 (both of which were on request of Scott)

Mumbo: Joel, Bdubs, Impulse (Scott and Scar could also be included) - 1

Tango: Joel, Jimmy, Etho, Martyn, Bdubs - 1

Lizzie: Pearl, Jimmy, Bigb - 1

#trafficblr #scott smajor #smallishbeans #grian #ethoslab #gtws #only including the first 5 names on this list for my own sanity #life series #traffic SMP #also I will never get over how funny real life is as a name for this smp #ooc it sounds so bad

87 notes · View notes

emry-stars-art · 3 months

Note

Oooh do go on about raven neil and jean 👀 (if you’re so inclined ☺️) - @neil-jostenminyard

*chanting* raven Neil raven Neil raven Neil (and lots of Jean) (quite possibly even jeaneil) (although most of the thoughts are post-ravens lol)

So my personal thoughts about this are also mostly thanks to chats and inspiration/prompting from @jtl-fics and @greenautumnleaves so if you see any additions from them on this post it's most likely also thoughts I adore lol

Anyway this got kind of long so:

I ALSO latched onto Sakavic's statement that Neil wouldn't leave Jean in the nest bc yeah it makes sense and also ow

But just the two of them being partnered up like Riko and Kevin as is common in these aus, and then after Kevin gets out first, they have to stick together and rely on each other even MORE because Riko is pissed that Kevin is gone and probably takes it out on the next closest two idk

But in our imaginings, Renee or Andrew get Jean out quicker than in canon, again because Neil would refuse to leave Jean behind and I can only imagine he'd go so far as to trick or manipulate Jean into leaving. Maybe by being at a certain place at a certain time to get picked up, however he can make it happen. But the issue we run into is that once that's done, what the hell would Neil have left at Evermore, besides Exy that maybe he still loves deep down. But Exy's been so warped being raised on it at the nest that at that point his obsession is barely recognizable.

Kevin might recognize this, because he knew Neil in the nest. Or at least he knew the person that Neil presented himself as. But it's probably more likely that Jean recognizes this, and yeah things are super rocky and weird but Jean can barely even function without Neil. So back a fox goes to rescue their second raven's partner.

They bring Neil back to Palmetto and he and Jean are completely inseparable. Emotionally and physically. Neither of them act like, feel like, or even call themselves "touchy feely" or "clingy" people but as soon as Neil is treated for various intense and mysterious injuries, they're curled up in some hidden place for hours. Even the short time having left Neil behind made Jean almost too anxious to leave his room. Even the short time without Jean - now with more punishment for aiding Jean's escape - was enough for Neil to consider something drastic.

(side note: Andrew now has not one, not two, but three gorgeous tragic boys under his supervision and I'm sure he's handling that totally normally lmao. But it's so obvious to him that Jean and Neil have something going on that any ideas for himself aren't worth entertaining.)

So it's a little easier to ease out of various habits and thought processes because Jean and Neil are doing it together, with outside help. They fix their sleep cycles/rhythms, try a slightly more normal college diet, and most slowly lose their "win or die" mindset in practices. They're still never seen without each other - Wymack had a talk with some of the school board about their schedules and dorm arrangements for the first semester. In reality, he's not sure if he should have them go cold turkey on raven habits or if he should take it slower, but he's doing his damn best to get these boys adjusted to life outside a cult. And Neil and Jean, whether or not they actively realize it, find that step to be the one they absolutely cannot take. Why would they go through the agony of learning to live separately if they don't have to. When no one else understands them like the other, when they've already seen each other's worst so nothing else is worth keeping secret between them. Who else is Jean going to go to when having a better life makes him feel like he more deserves death or punishment and the guilt hits him so hard he can't breathe, much less sleep. Who else is Neil going to go to when he can't let go of his birthright - if he isn't good at what he does (Exy) he literally could just be shot like a lame horse - and he's not allowed to go practice Exy against a wall to the point of tearing himself apart anymore so he forces his feet away from the court to find the only person he knows he'll listen to when they say no.

Kevin, of course, is keeping a close eye on the two, whether unintentionally or on purpose is unclear. Neil still has a mouth on him, he sometimes plays mind games with the foxes like chess against himself, and most of all does not allow anyone to get too close to Jean. Jean is still quiet, having learned not only to take a punishment without resistance but also that Neil will speak first. Neil will resist so Jean doesn't have to. He's safer in Neil's shadow.

Maybe it's a phrase or warning that Neil uses and that Kevin recognizes. Maybe it's a gesture between Neil and Jean that Kevin oversees. Maybe it's just the general demeanor of the two. But whatever it is is familiar to Kevin, not in a "I remember this from them in the nest" way. He can recognize by now that Riko was not good to him, he can acknowledge it even if the rest of him hasn't caught up. He looks at Jean in Neil's shadow and remembers himself in Riko's.

As if Butcher's son Nathaniel Wesninski wasn't already scary enough on his own.

But Kevin won't allow this kind of thing on his court, and he's not good at it but he is still trying to let go of unhealthy raven ideals. If Neil is holding onto some fucked up dynamic, Kevin is going to put a stop to it.

He pulls Jean aside, a miraculous feat. He asks what Neil has done.

"Mistake" might be an understatement.

It could very easily be the longest string of words Jean has said to anyone besides Neil. Kevin doesn't know near as much French as he does in canon - Neil is the one that shares that secret defiance - so it's all clear English, Jean making sure Kevin understands every word. Kevin should never speak about Neil that way again. He knows nothing about them, he shouldn't so much as pretend to understand Neil. Neil is the only good thing that ever happened to Jean. Kevin never cared enough to bring it up in the nest, so he has no right to start caring now.

It isn't great for their already tumultuous relationship. Kevin wonders for a bit if Jean would tell Neil about it - then next practice Neil doesn't even try to work with Kevin, even after the two had made it a point as strikers to figure out how to. He ignores the other strikers entirely, falling immediately and seamlessly into perfect synch with Jean behind him, speaking hardly a word of English the whole practice. Because he knows that will make Kevin even more angry than Neil being actively hostile to his new teammates.

Kevin isn't sure what he was expecting. Chances are Jean hadn't even needed to bring it up for Neil to notice something was off.

As for Andrew, I think he could still pick up a game of truths. He'd need to offer a similar deal as he did for canon Neil, this time for Neil-and-Jean, the entity of the two of them together. I think he could ensure some cooperation by saying he won't force Jean and Neil apart from each other the way some others have muttered about doing. Even if Neil knows by now the codependence isn't healthy, neither of them are ready to give it up.

It probably really throws Andrew to hear that they don't consider themselves to be an item. They're together, sure, but for a raven that doesn't always, maybe even rarely, means "in a traditional relationship". Neil and Jean definitely never offer any clarification. That's no one else's business, even if they could explain it so that a non-raven could understand. Generally I feel like if this is an andreil universe, it's an even longer, stranger, more winding road to get there than in canon.

I'm almost CERTAIN there's more Im forgetting about rn but this has been my taster on raven Neil+Jean, I hope it was at least a little bit coherent, and greenautumnleaves - I hope this comes anywhere close to your galaxy brain ideas on these two lol. Maybe I'll be back with other thoughts later who knows

#maybe i lied. maybe i will make raven neil/jean art of my own accord #because if any other pairing in the series drives me crazy it is whatever tf these two have going on #thank you for allowing me to text dump lmao #not art sorry guys #neil josten #jean moreau #jeaneil #nathaniel wesninski #raven neil au #oh also. i had to throw andrew in there not because of my vanilla shipping tendencies #but because theres far too many ways for things to go so wrong and end so badly for him in universes where he doesnt have neil #so he at LEAST has a bit of something. does this make sense

85 notes · View notes

yandere-arts · 10 months

Note

Have you seen the incident of the girl who took a picture with the help of a knife on social media? How would Ghoat.Konig.Alex.Graves. Soap.And Roach (if you're writing for him) react if they accidentally saw us doing this? (Note, we're not dating them) and I'll even send you the makeup photo with the knife I'm talking about. (this is a headcanons request) have a nice daaayyy 🥰

(For female reader)

A/N: thank you so much for your patience sweetheart! Sorry it took so long to get these 😔 I appreciate the request — it was quite interesting to write 💕 for future ref, I don’t write for Roach or Alex Keller (unless you meant Alejandro 😭 ) since I don’t really know much about them 😅 I also decided to do these in yandere! versions as we discussed and some are post-kidnapping bc I had no ideas for pre

TW: yandere stuff, punishment, torture, cursing, stuff that makes the reader cry, assorted BS, König is horny asf but yk me too 😭 — you know the drill :), DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT

YANDERE GHOST. 💀

Oh, sweetheart. He’s probably THE WORSF GUY TO DO THIS WITH.

I mean, you probably picked up the knife with intentions other than doing your makeup. Even if this is after his year of endless torture just to « train » you, and you’re completely loyal to him (meaning Stockholm Syndrome has already set in), he’s still going to be furious. He’ll definitely think you were trying to leave him.

He likely went looking for you once he realize you weren’t in the bedroom or the living room, and of course he didn’t want to be late to the « date » (in his mind, at least) that would change both of your lives eternally, but when he saw that hunting knife, HIS hunting knife, pressed dangerously close to his favorite part of your face, he forgot about the little velvet box in his pocket.

Ghost probably acted without thinking and snatched the knife away from you instantly, pressing your body into the cold glass of the bathroom mirror. He’ll hold your offending wrist, a grim look in his eyes.

And all the while, you’ll plead and ask, « why? »

His eyes will snap up, a new fire blazing because of your words. « Why would you ever use a knife to do your makeup? Are you crazy, darling? Need to be retaught how to act normally?» (You probably do after everything he’s done to you 😭)

Overall, a very terrible experience. Likely the worst, and he’ll definitely retrain you as a result of this incident. You lost your proposal and « honeymoon bliss » privileges, and now you’re under this vigilant, cold gaze 25/8. It’s for the best, after all, as he doesn’t want his darling s/o hurt.

YANDERE KONIG. 💣

Two simultaneous thoughts. #1: Oh, how lovely, my little Maus is doing her makeup even though she’s so beautiful! #2: What is that in her hand.

And after he « gently » grabs your waist (darkening already present bruises), he demands to know why his knife is in your little hands. He’s angry. He’s furious. And he’s delusional.

König cares far too much for his darling and certainly believes that they are some sort of goddess or angel descended from the heavens. He simultaneously feels that they are too precious and beautiful for this world, but losing them would result in a bloodbath, no matter whose fault it is.

König will be sitting you down after this to talk about why you shouldn’t lay your hands on his filthy weaponry and why you should just keep yourself within his embrace, tucked away from all of reality. (He does the latter speech at least once a day anyway.) He may also express his dissatisfaction more… intimately later. (He likes the way you were gripping the handle of HIS knife.) It depends on if you’ve tried to escape recently or not or if this incident is just another slip-up in a series of unfortunate events (from his perspective.)

Oh, and don’t worry, with this man’s wealth, you’ll probably have some neat tool from Sephora to help with straight eyeliner in a day or two.

So not the worst experience, but still pretty bad and will result in an irritated König (though some of you probably think that’s a good thing…)

YANDERE GRAVES. 🥧

(Yes, I did make his emoji American Apple Pie, and yes, I do think it’s funny asf. Leave me alone.)

« Watcha got there, doll? Seems a little much for a little lady like you to handle. Here, lemme help, » Dumbledore he said calmly.

Of course, he’s no happy camper when he sees that knife in your hands, but are any of them???

Graves would be one of the most calm of the COD boys in this situation. He’s upset, that’s for sure, and you can feel his pine aftershave burning your nostrils as he snatches the blade away. His tone is neutral but the tightness in his neck and jaw give away his anger. Tread lightly.

This would probably serve as another example to him of why you were so fragile and needed to be locked away in the first place. If he hasn’t taken you already, it’ll happen soon.

Graves would have a very strict ideology of « I’m the only one who can hurt her, and that’s final. » He doesn’t even want you to have control over yourself. He’s so possessive that he doesn’t even want you to be controlled by anyone other than him. (Which also means cutting ties with your friends/family, getting fired suddenly from work, and him always breathing down your neck (sometimes literally.))

You’ll see repercussions for this, but he’ll still go light on you. Don’t forget that he’s a hardened solider, though, so his definition of light might be completely different from any civilian’s.

YANDERE SOAP. 🧼

Probably has the best reaction out of all of them. He won’t be very happy, but he’ll still find the situation a bit funny.

He stands there completely in shock and in awe and a bit frightened of you, but it still brings a chuckle out. Soap will make you think that it’s all a game and you’re just the silliest girlie on the planet until you put that knife down to do mascara and suddenly it and every other sharp object in the house is gone.

I think Soap would be a more laid-back yandere, so he’ll only react poorly if you act poorly (meaning you present a threat to yourself or him.) He’s very lenient though, and once or twice let his guard down for longer than usual. But the minute you do something stupid, he’s internally panicking and scolding you and himself.

Don’t give this poor guy any more problems, please.

Like the others, he’ll have a chat with you. He’s lost a good number of important people in his life and certainly doesn’t to lose another, so if you truly care about him, you’ll listen. That’s his reasoning.

But if you value your freedom and sanity, maybe it’s best to not look a wooden horse in its mouth and allow for an incident like this to happen again. Soap is soft and bubbly around you until he’s harsh and rough.

#yandere cod #yandere ghost #yandere konig #yandere soap #phillip graves #yandere headcanons #literally several months late and i severely apologize but i got sick and work sucked my soul out like a damn hoover

304 notes · View notes

usereddie · 1 month

Note

Please with a cherry on top 🍒💕 tell us all about your little aus you have for bucktommy.

Especially the season 1 divergence 💛

surely i will!!!! this got very long btw so i'm putting it under a read more but the aus i mentioned in the tags of this post are

model au

college au

neighbor au

canon divergence s1 meeting

okay here you go:

model au: this is the one that sparked that entire post bc i saw those two photos and went "wait....." anyway. buck and tommy meet on a shoot and buck is immediately reduced to a giggly, blushing mess. he's new to the modelling industry but so ridiculously pretty he's already getting booked left and right. tommy's been in the game for a while, and he's so comfortable in his skin in front of the camera that it has buck watching him in awe. a bts video of a shoot they did together blows up on twitter, people talking about their chemistry, how hot they are together, and it gets people talking. buck is terribly, terribly embarrassed, worried tommy's gonna realize buck's got a huge crush on him, but then tommy doesn't mind at all, and is actually really, really on board with buck's feelings if the hickeys the makeup department have to cover the next time he's in front of a camera are anything to go by

(also, buck discovering he loves being behind the camera and getting every candid of his boyfriend possible. the professional, smoldering, glamour shots are nice, yeah, but the one of tommy smiling when he realizes buck's been taking pictures of him? those are his favorites.)

college au: listen, i know hs/college au's aren't for everyone but i love them. the frat parties, the "we kissed the day before christmas break and now i don't know how you feel because we're not talking and i can't just show up at your dorm" angst, their friends pestering them about the obvious feelings they have for each other. come on!!! buck and tommy are both freshman though tommy's a bit older because he took some time between high school and college to get a job so he could pay for his school. buck thinks tommy doesn't like him very much but tommy's kind of in love with the guy, but the way he shows his affection and his teasing attempts at flirting are clearly not getting the message across. so he kisses him in the front lawn of a frat house during a party because obviously they're in frats and buck doesn't get it, thinks tommy's doing it because he found out buck likes him and is making fun of him, and tommy doesn't even let him finish angrily confessing his feelings before he's tackling him onto the lawn and kissing him stupid.

neighbor au: they both work odd hours. tommy's still a firefighter but buck's a nurse and they've seen each other a few times on the job, enough that buck's coworkers always let him know when the hot firefighter came by, but they have no idea they're neighbors because their hours just never. line. up. until one day buck's sick to the point not even he can justify going to work and tommy's got his day off and they run into each other in the hallway of their apartment complex when buck goes out to get his door dash. he is immediately horrendously embarrassed because ohmygod the hot firefighter knows what i look like in spongebob pajama pants. tommy doesn't mind though, clearly, because a few hours later he's knocking on buck's door and handing over a tupperware of homemade cookies. tommy doesn't stick around very long because buck is clearly super tired, but when buck opens the lid there's a note with tommy's number and a 'next time we have off on the same day, you wanna grab coffee?' the smiley face is lopsided and uneven but it makes the biggest grin appear on buck's face

(also, they have dogs in the selfies i used in that post and i like to think their dogs are also dating thanks)

canon divergence: oh man i LOVE canon divergence in general, but s1 bucktommy would go so hard. like au where tommy doesn't leave the 118 so he's there for buck's probie year? incredible. tommy, for starters, wouldn't be able to stand buck 1.0 and buck, like the oblivious bisexual he is, wouldn't understand why he cares so much. slowly, buck starts trying to get his attention. talking to him, getting to know him. tommy's still in the closet and trying to keep from losing his mind because the pretty playboy who sleeps around is suddenly no longer hooking up with women in favor of trying to get to know him. tommy knows he should tell buck to stop because there's no way this won't end with his heart broken (who hasn't fallen for a straight person and cried to sad ballads about it? queer culture), but buck is actually sweet and he's not funny because his jokes are terrible but he makes him laugh and tommy's determined to introduce him to all the best, classic romcoms (the man's favorite movie is love, actually, c'mon). the more time they spend together the less buck goes out, and after a long shift, sitting on the floor of tommy's living room eating pizza, when tommy starts leaning in, buck doesn't think twice before closing the distance. tommy pulls back, asks if he's sure, if this is okay, and buck, who hasn't had sex since he realized he wanted tommy in a big, bad, really really gay way, kisses him breathless.

tommy doesn't want to pressure buck, doesn't want to move too fast because he really, really likes him. buck is annoyingly charmed by it because he's never had a meaningful relationship and as weird as it is to want that with a guy he really does want it with tommy (but he also obviously takes it as a challenge to see how far he can push his boyfriend's buttons before he bends him over the back of the couch).

okay yeah these are my bucktommy au ideas i love them very bad thanks mwah!!!

#bia gets mail #anon #bucktommy #evan buckley #tommy kinard

64 notes · View notes

melodic-haze · 26 days

Note

you’re cooking so hard w those fics,,, may I request some sub clorinde?

one of the scenarios in the fic can be where she wears a vibrator on her shift 🙏 (semi-public ofc)

☆ — DEMO TRACK: sub!Clorinde x dom!Reader

☆ — TYPE: NSFW

☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: semi-public 🫶, use of toys (the vibe's silly and magical bc this is a magical world and I can do what I want), consensual sexual corruption

☆ — NOTES: Why is this so long anyway DUDE THANK YOU 🙏🙏🙏🙏 I try my best to hashtag serve the cuntry. I somehow brought Navia into it as well I hope you don't mind 😭😭😭 NOT in the pair though, just like a chunk of the post ig

Ohhh my god Clorinde looks SOOOO fun to toy with 🫶🫶🫶 your MIND anon

She takes her job so seriously but when she's off the clock she's so silly she's so unserious like just LOOK at her with Navia???? I love her

I think you two joke around when it's just the two of you in the comfort of your own home when the whole matter pops up. Maybe she's like prepping dinner for the two of you (if you can cook as well you probably have a rotation) as it happens

It was therapeutic, watching Clorinde practically glide around the kitchen in such an organised manner. She often said that her skills as the Champion Duelist and her skills as a home chef were synonymous together in multiple ways, though despite her meaning it as a jest her proficiency with both activities was undoubtedly unmatched. She said you were a bit biased too, but you paid no heed.

"..You look so much more relaxed here, compared to when you're out for work," you muse as you observed her.

To which she looks up at you momentarily before looking back down at the vegetables she was chopping up, her speed and efficiency not slipping up in any way despite the light distraction, "A guard cannot necessarily be seen as.. well, whimsical in order to be taken seriously."

"Yeah, but you're THE Champion Duelist. Surely that allows you some form of leeway towards having to act all serious every time."

"I'm afraid not, mon ange." She shakes her head with a small smile, "What brought this up all of a sudden?"

You shrugged, "I dunno. I guess whenever I see you around, I always see you so.. focused and stoic."

"You mean to say I'm boring when we are outside?"

"You aren't? But you could do with some loosening up."

She looks up again with an amused eyebrow raise, "Between the two of us, my body is much more limber compared to yours."

"You ass!" You scoffed, crossing your arms in mock annoyance, "Go back to cutting carrots instead of taking potshots at me."

"Taking shots is my specialty, though? And I was already done with the task."

"Clorinde!"

The electro wielder chuckled lightly before moving to pour the vegetable mix into the pan, "Still, I fail to see your point."

"My point is," you push yourself off the wall you had been leaning on and move closer to your girlfriend, "I wanna see you all cute during your job at least once."

"Am I not 'cute' enough for you?"

"You are! But I feel like I should be intimidated too. Because, you know, I don't really want to be put in the spotlight for some kinda crime."

"Uh huh. Say I do agree with you then; what do you propose I do?" She is genuinely curious at first, but when she sees you smile the way you do that's when she gets suspicious, "..I know that look, mon cœur. You want to do something risqué."

You hum as if pondering your next response while your arms wrap around her waist, though with the way she turns around with a knowing look and a swift move of turning the stove strength all the way down, you know that she doesn't believe that innocent bout of 'thinking' one bit.

"Do I? You really think so?"

"I know so." And she leans to kiss your cheek, "My skills in observation combined with my knowledge of your every habit isn't useless, you know.

"Hmm... Well, then." Your fingers snuck underneath the fabric of her shirt and traced nonsensical shapes on her skin as you spoke, "I did find something—an item—that could help you.. de-stress during work."

You know she took the hint when you looked her vibrant purple eyes. Perhaps you could've sworn them glow like the element she has command over.

But when she asks you of it—

"And what may this.. item be?"

—you both know full well that that is the only thing she has control over when you're involved.

When she finds out that you want to stuff a vibrator in her for the whole day as she works, she has to give herself time to process it. Like, really? While she's supposed to stay vigilant in case something wrong happens??? Like be serious wth is she gonna do when she's all dumb and distracted and something goes awfully wrong??????

All you say is that while you'd wanna try it out to see what happens, you won't force her to do so.........and against her better judgement, she takes it back. Not only does she want to make you happy and that she wants to prove that she isn't a coward, she.. is a little (a lot) interested in what may happen. Plus "it will prove to be somewhat of a fun challenge", she says, which yk whatever works for her

She learns to regret that come (lmao) the next day when it's actually put into practice

You found this specific vibe from a wandering seller, you see. Powered by a mix of different elements and with the usage of their reactions, it came in a pair—one that was now deep inside her and the other in your pocket, ready for you to hold onto and simply think on the intensity of the bullet's vibrations and effects

Its control range was rather far too, so it's not as if you even had to be in the city to control it. You wanted to see how she deals with such a situation though, so the most you do is carry on with your day instead of constantly following her around (but you do bump into her 'on accident' quite a few times though)

At first it starts out relatively fine for her. It's a manageable feeling, with it interchanging between a weak pace to something slightly faster—she can ignore it with her masterful discipline. Hell, she's even thinking that you might actually be taking it easy on her bc of her earlier concerns which.. how nice of you!!!

Except she's WRONG❗️❗️❗️ You're not being nice, you're biding your time. She probably should've been suspicious but she trusted you unconditionally which would be so cute and flattering at any other moment.........but right now it was so deliciously naive of her, to just let her guard down with you like that

You're slowly but surely testing the waters by playing with the intensity beyond its lowest settings; having it slowly incline nd decline, making it spike up, even manipulating the pattern of its vibrations within your mind. And you can tell that every mental command is successfully transferred when the gem you hold pulses with a faint feeling of warmth that passes after a very brief moment

You can't see her half the time whenever you're off doing something else but maybe that's what makes it better, especially when you see her and you make a point to keep out of her line of sight. She looks around for you like a frazzled animal that's trying to seem composed and yet you know she's becoming anything but from the way she subtly jolts to attention every time you change the vibe's directions, all endearingly paranoid over what you do next as you change the settings again and again and again

Despite the risk and the paranoia and everything though? As much as she wants to deny it, there is an ever increasing pool of arousal in her panties. It's not just from the vibrator, however—it's from the possible risk of getting caught partaking in the sinful act of walking around with a sex toy stuffed inside of her. She can't believe it, but the thrill of the risk and the overthinking is definitely not doing her any favours in terms of trying to keep calm

It's when she has a certain exchange that has her ABSOLUTELY ruined. She had spotted Navia during one of her breaks the same time that the other had clocked onto her too. The head of the Spina di Rosula walked up to her with a smile and a friendly greeting and in no time at all, they get to talking the minutes away

Catching up to Navia again without such dreadful tension from before was definitely a relief. It was as if they had chatted about everything and nothing at all at the same time, with the both of them laughing lightly. The exchange was certainly a welcome distraction, both from her job and the bullet-shaped vibrator that hit and teased her sensitive spots every now and again—you had definitely become braver as time went on, but you weren't going to break her composure just yet.

..Or well, really, she realised that she probably shouldn't have given it any thought when her eyes see you watching her at a distance. She trails off in the midst of her sentence as time seemed to slow to a stop when your lips curl up into an all-too-familiar expression.

Before Navia can even ask her if she's okay or try to break her out of her sudden reverie, Clorinde flinches and almost keels over at the sudden EXTREME increase of speed and force and-- is that a temperature increase too? She doesn't react quietly either—she bites back a yelp, managing a strangled gasp instead. Was this what you were aiming for the entire time? To build it all up until the most inopportune time??

Navia was undoubtedly worried, her hands immediately dropping her parasol to hold her friend steady, "Clorinde?! What happened? Are you hurt?"

The duelist shook her head in an attempt to clear her head but the ever-shifting movement inside her didn't allow that. So instead she tried her best to answer as unaffected as possible, despite her seemingly dramatic display, "Yes, I-- mm.. I'm alright. Just a sudden migraine, is all. Perhaps I've been-- working too hard."

"Whatever did I tell you about working yourself to the bone," the blonde asks, though she doesn't look fully convinced that it's just a migraine, "maybe you should retire for the day. I can tell your--"

"No! It's alright," she rushes out, "I will be fine after some time, you need not worry about me."

"But--"

"Do you not think I can handle myself?"

"I do, but if a migraine gets you such a violent reaction, then surely that's a cause for concern. Are friends not allowed to be worried for each other?"

They are, except this isn't really a migraine she's suffering from!!

(She doesn't know whether she loves or hates the fact that her not being able to say anything about her predicament to her good friend gets her going even more.)

"She probably needs a little rest, somewhere where the sun isn't hitting her eyes."

"Y/N!"

Clorinde looks to you approaching behind the blonde and making yourself known with a happy greeting and she can't help but narrow her eyes at you despite the vibrator in her cunt trying to take all her focus away from her.. or maybe it was due to exactly that, to which your smile widens just a tad further at the effect you have on her.

"Yes, that would be a good place for me to recover. In fact," she keeps her eyes on you as she speaks, "they can take it-- mnf.. take it here."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, no need to worry. I will talk to you again s-- ..soon, Navia."

Soon enough, you all part ways (you with Clorinde in tow), leaving a very confused and suspicious Navia alone where you once stood. Neither of you say anything, though as you both reach a deserted alley somewhere, sun blocked by the towering buildings around you, that's when she snaps.

And it is such a lovely thing to witness.

By snapping, I don't mean that she cums right away. I mean she's all over you, gloved hands grasping onto your body and hastily pleading for you to finally help her take the edge off

You're so absolutely mean for doing what you did!!! She says she regrets ever saying yes to this plan and entertaining you like this, to which you laugh at her face. Sure, it would've been a cruel reaction to her distress.. if she weren't so addled with lust; her eyes dark and pupils blown wide, her panties unbelievably wet

It gets worse when you whisper things to her as well such as "you definitely enjoyed it" and "do you think Navia knew? Would you have wanted her to know?" bc even when she shakes her head vehemently and denies it, you can feel her pussy pulsing as you taunt her.........

But then you pull your hand back and Clorinde's looking at you in a mix of frustration and confusion, a complete far cry from her ever-so-composed demeanour on a normal day

She asks you why. Does she need to beg even more? Do you want her to do anything else? She needs this but she's also very aware you're still outside, despite this corner of the area being practically abandoned, so it both gives her a thrill AND a sense of urgency

Your answer? Not one she expected, but should have probably saw coming from a mile away: you want her to cum with the toy and herself only. She's right, this IS still a public space.. so obviously such close proximity would be VERY suspicious, right? And nobody would be able to see the toy buzzing in her, so surely it'd be the best solution

She tries to protest, but you don't budge. Hell, threaten to turn it off for the rest of the day and she'll keel over and do exactly what you ask her to do

So you manipulate the vibrator, up close and personal this time, and you relish in the restricted moans and desperate breaths she lets out as she essentially fucks herself in the alleyway with your help. As the vibe bends to your will within her in different ways, she took her glove off one of her hands with her teeth in a desperate attempt to not dirty her visible clothing before her now-ungloved hand darts into her panties to rub her clit and pleasure herself to you

It's not long when she practically explodes as the setting goes the highest it's ever been, her orgasm SO intense that it has her seeing stars and actually dropping to the ground if it weren't for you immediately rushing over to catch her on time (and maybe you get a light shock of electro too, much to your chagrin, but really it's technically your fault so 🤷‍♀️). You use the control gem to help her with her high, slowly decreasing its intensity until the after-shock is reduced to a few twitches from her here and there

She's practically a lifeless form for a few mins and you can't help but laugh at the situation. She lifts her head up, absolutely unimpressed at your amusement, though a small smile makes her way onto her lips anyway

When she's gained enough strength to hold herself up without falling (mostly bc you whine after a while ab how she's heavy, to which she slaps you up in the head lightly and tells you it's your fault lmao), you both make sure she looks presentable enough to actually go back in public again. You asked her if she wanted to skip instead but she's so duty-bound that she doesn't gaf if she feels fucked-out, she WILL continue her duties

But like. Let's be real though. Esp when you told her she could take the toy out bc you're more than satisfied but she wanted to actually keep it in? You both know that not only will you both have a round two of sorts when you get back home, but this won't necessarily be the last time you'll use this toy after today

You could say she found a love for it 🤷‍♀️ not like she'd ever explicitly admit it when she's not all dumbed out for you in the comfort of your own home

She doesn't even really need to, not with that display earlier

117 notes · View notes

ssa-atlas-alvez · 1 year

Note

okay but- cowboy!reader having like a lot of scars bc no self preservation y'know. i feel like he'd cover some of them up with tattoos but some are just too delicate. im just imaginin' the team of seeing like a sleeve of them for the first time or maybe he has a lot on his back and everyone just wants to know what they mean and when the heck he got all of them and yeah. also my poor boy you're really runnin him through it

- 🦦

Description: scar reveal

Warnings: scars, abusive backstory

A/n: I know, I kinda feel bad but also there's so much more to come for him and I some of it (if I decide to post it) is really harsh and it will just shatter him bless him but again idk if I'm gonna post it so we'll see aha!

Taglist: @xweirdo101x @xdark-acadamiax @ara-a-bird @heidss @chubbyboyinflannel @pendragon-writes @migwayne @bigolgay @technikerin23 @supercriminalbean @honestlycasualarcade @caffeine-mess @1s3v3n1 @oddmiles @kevyeen @stealing-kneecaps @criminalskies @woodandwaxwings @wizardmon3 @aphroditeslovr @ducks118 @azeal-peal @13thdoctor-run @introvertpan84

You didn't really think about the scars most of the time. Sure, some of the bad ones haunted you at night, or with raised voices, but they weren't bad. Most of them didn't hurt anymore. Some of them did, emotionally, anyway. These ones you got covered with things you loved. The butterfly, for example, sat on your chest, a small Palos Verdes Blue Butterfly for JJ. Big enough to cover a particularly painful scar without drawing attention. Meaningful enough that it made you feel warm inside when you saw it, rather than the dread and fear that used to build up when seeing the scar.

Some, however, you couldn't cover. Most days, you forgot they existed. Others, they were all you could think about.

The bad ones, that is. Not the ones you got from falling out of a tree at the age of seven, or off a horse at sixteen. No. The ones you got when you pissed your foster parents off enough for them to create a permanent reminder.

The ones on your back bothered you. You didn't like that it was a part of your body that everyone but you could see. They would witness some of your worst memories laid out in front of them, some of which you had never even seen.

The ones on your arms were mostly covered, at least the ones on your upper arms and shoulders. They were easy to cover. The forearms you struggled to cover, not that there were many here, that would have been too visible.

Not all of these scars were linked with sadness. Some were happy. Some were from you being reckless (like daring your older brother that you could jump from the treehouse and land on your feet unharmed - you broke your arm. You were seventeen.). Some were from clumsiness growing up (tripping over the corner of a rug when running to watch the football with your brothers). All in all, they told your life story, from the scared little boy to the rebellious teen to the loved young man to the brave man that stood up for those that need it.

So yes, it made you feel vulnerable at times, but most of the time? Most of the time it made you happy to be alive. To be the person you were today.

You knew the team had already seen your tattoos, from a slight distance. They either hadn't seen the scars, or had decided not to ask about them. Either way, you weren't going to complain. You'd tell them or they'd ask eventually.

It was JJ who noticed first, the pair of you sat in the roundtable room, everyone else had gone home. She had gently brushed over a scar on your arm with a curious look. "I got that from trippin' over a rug to watch football," You said, giving a small smile. Her hand moved to one just below it, "Fallin' off a horse," She fingers traced the next scar mid way up your arm, the curious look turning to worry when you tense.

"Does it hurt?" It looked painful, still raised after years.

You shake your head, "Not anymore." You said truthfully, "They used to. Now they're just there, constantly reminding me."

"Except for the ones you cover,"

"Except for the ones I cover." You corrected yourself. Your eyes darted back down to the scar she was tracing. A particularly painful memory. You looked back up, giving a shy smile, "I really do love you, you know."

"I should hope so," She smirked, "We have been dating for over six months now."

"It never gets old, hearing you say that." You answer.

"Good, because I don't plan on stopping any time soon," She winks, gently pressing her lips to yours.

297 notes · View notes

frankiensteinsmonster · 9 months

Text

ID in Alt Text!

Hey, sorry I haven't been doing my daily outfit posts lately-- I guess I never mentioned why I started them, but it's this personal project that I'm working on where I take a picture (though, in all honesty, it's a lot of pictures lol) in whatever I'm wearing and I feature my cane to promote awareness and give representation to other cane users and members of the cpunk and Physically Disabled community. I'm working on building up the courage to take these pictures outside as well, because I do them on campus, but we deserve to see ourselves outside as well!

The reason I haven't been keeping up with it is because my partner and I have really been really struggling financially as well as with our mental health (and me with my physical health as well, obviously lol) we moved across the country to go to school and it is So Hard-- I had to drop three out of five of my classes because the course work was just too much in volume and I need a job really bad (which is going to be Hard to do since we don't even know why I'm in such chronic pain yet 🙃 it's hard not to feel defeated!)

Either way, I think going to start posting them with the tag #TheVainCanes and #MobilityAidVainity but I'm also going to host a poll for some options bc I want this to be a widespread community thing!

I'm choosing these names because I've seen from both ableds and disabled elitists this idea that we and our mobility aides need to look like they're fresh out the hospital for us to be Believed and deserving of respect, and anything beyond that voids our suffering and invalidates our experiences-- and I think that's reductive, harmful, and just plain wrong! Our mobility aides are an extension of ourselves and we deserve to dress them up however we want. We deserve representation, and the normalization of Joy and Having Personality While Disabled.

This will be intersectional as well (bc. I mean look at me. Also I don't need a reason!) , people from all identities are welcomed and encouraged to join! This is meant to be a celebration of Us, Disabled, BIPOC, LGBTQIA2S+, and All That Jazz! (If you use a mobility aid, you're in!) We're beautiful gorgeous handsome devils and I think we'd do good seeing how good we all look in a designated tag

Also my cash app and Venmo are @/cherubpunque 👀 if anyone has some spare change I could have that would be an amazing help towards feeding me, my partner, and our two cats!!

To kick things off, I am a 2S, Afroindigenous person (Gullah and Kanien'kehá:ka!) who experiences chronic pain and fatigue. I have PTSD and a few other brain things going on, less than perfect eyesight, and a great passion for Art, Music, Subculture, and Helping Others whenever and however I can! I'm majoring in art and am working towards becoming a published graphic novelist. Idk I just have a lot of love and support to give, and a big need for love and support for myself as well, and I'm hoping to offer us a good opportunity for us to connect in a space that's just for us! We're already living outside of society's expectations for health, so why should we let these folks decide the way we look while doing it? Express yourself! (I'll also be tagging myself in future as #mothie so you can find me in the tags! Anyways, I gotta go lay down. My back hurts.)

114 notes · View notes

unclewaynemunson · 9 months

Note

Jeff is one of my favorite characters and I think we should start a post of all our favorite Jeff headcanons. He and Freak get left out in almost every Eddie-centric fic I read, with his "best friend" being either Gareth or Chrissy, and I'm tired of it. Jeff is wonderful. Here's my hc's:

- Jeff and Eddie have been best friends since middle school. They started CC and Hellfire together.

- they went to the Snowball together and rigged the bubble machine to spew bubbles during the slow dance songs. The dance had to end early and Jeff and Eddie never got caught

- Jeff's parents loves Eddie. They used to have sleepovers at each other's place almost every weekend.

- Jeff was the first person Eddie came out to. Jeff tried to be surprised and "that's great, man, thanks for telling me!" But Eddie saw right through that.

- Eddie is afraid of geese and spiders. Jeff thinks this is fucking hilarious.

- post-Vecna, Jeff is the one Eddie reconnects with first. Eddie tells him everything, despite the NDAs and Steve's warnings. Jeff believes him, because he knows there's wacky shit going on in Hawkins, and he's seen Eddie's wounds.

- they have that kind of friendship that nothing can break. Even if they don't see or talk to each other for years, because Life Happens and people lose touch, they'll always have part of themselves carved out for their best friend.

Ok, that's all I got for now, and sorry for the long ask! I just love Jeff so much and he (and Freak, too, because Freak gets ignored because of fatphobia) deserves just as much love and attention as Gareth gets.

What are your Jeff and Eddie headcanons?

I am loving this Jeff love and your headcanons, thank you so much for sending this to me!!! <3

I think with Unnamed Freak things are a bit different bc, yaknow, he doesn't have a name. For me at least that makes me hesitant to write about him so I don't wanna go as far as to say it's all bc he's fat (even though I'm not gonna deny that that probably also plays a part in how popular he is in this fandom urgh). Anyway, yes this fandom certainly does Jeff dirty. I think it's this gross combination of racism and people copying a lot from already existing stories, characterizations and headcanons without much critical thinking of their own (which baffles me, if you're creative enough to write a story please use that creativity for some originality ffs). Anyway, this is gonna turn into a rant again can you tell I'm still annoyed? so let's turn to something more positive now, like my headcanons for our beloved Jeff:

He was the first person in Hawkins (after Wayne obviously) that Eddie got close to. For Jeff it was kinda the same, being a black, nerdy boy in this town had been very isolating for him and Eddie was his first real friend.

Unnamed Freak made their duo into a trio a bit later. All the others in the group (including Gareth) were Eddie's "lost little sheepies" who he sought out to protect. This means that Jeff and Unnamed Freak are the only people who don't borderline worship Eddie but see him (and love him) for who he is including all his flaws. They're also the only ones not afraid to call him out on his bullshit.

Jeff's mom is really cool. Her name is Pauline and she's not like Jeff at all (she was a cheerleader in high school). Despite their differences they love each other a lot. (Jeff's mom is actually heavily featured in one of the fics I wrote so I got her all fleshed out lmao)

He has two little twin sisters. They're friends with Erica, one of them is one of her friends we meet in the mall in s3. He has this typical hate-love relationship with his sisters: they fight a lot, but at the end of the day, he would die for them.

HE'S BISEXUAL

While he can't wait to get out of Hawkins and to a place that'll be more accepting of him, he doesn't want to move too far away from his family.

He's the most loyal friend in the world, 100% a ride-or-die kinda guy

While he does love metal a lot, his guilty pleasure is Tina Turner

Tell me all your Jeff headcanons i wanna hear more about him!

#don't mind me rambling about stranger things #jeff stranger things #corroded coffin #stranger things

107 notes · View notes

ambrosiagourmet · 4 months

Note

i'd love your analysis and opinions of the lovely izutsumi (izutsumi) for the character meme :3c

Izutsumiiii~

First impression

Once again tbh my impression of her was formed from Fandom Osmosis before I actually encountered her. In this case: The Best Take on a Catgirl Ever

Impression now

Yeah hi this ask is what prompted me to write this post about my thoughts on Izutsumi's role in the story

Anyway in addition to that... I love her. I really appreciate how her trauma and coping mechanisms are handled, and I adore the Cat of it all. Some of my favorite panels are just the ones where Izutsumi is in the background doing cat things. She's got so much spirit and she grows so much and she's got so much future ahead of her... ahh... Izutsumi...

Favorite moment

I was going to say the entirety of the succubus fight, especially the two hearts bit. And that probably IS my favorite moment, but I'm going to highlight this detail instead bc it's easy to miss and so beloved:

She wipes their faces clean and gets her kitty hairs all over them....

Idea for a story

Hmmm... I mean really any kind of post-canon exploration of her would be so good. There are already at least a couple of good oneshots I've seen doing that, but honestly I'd love something LONG and just... about her figuring herself out. How she decides where to fit in, what she does with her relationships, what she does with her freedom.

I guess really what I'm thinking of is something that captures the "healing isn't linear" experience of trying to move on from as much trauma grief and isolation as Izutsumi has experienced. I think a story where she has room to backslide and move forward and fail and apologize and forgive herself and forgive the people around her... those ups and downs would be cool to see played out in full.

Unpopular opinion

??? She's kitty. We all are in agreement on this one, I think

Favorite relationship

Okay this is actually hard because on the surface level it's definitely of course her and Marcille. BUT... I have also been really enjoying revisiting tidbits of her and Senshi (especially the way he makes her food the chapter when she joins...), and I want to explore more of her and Laios too...

I'll still just stick with her and Marcille though, because they are very sweet and fun and good.

Favorite headcanon

I can't track it down right now, but there is a bonus comic doodle that's like "what was everyone doing at 13?" and Izutsumi's response is like. Pshh?? 13? That was four years ago how am I supposed to remember" and like. My girl has SO many trauma repressed memory issues. [Izutsumi voice] what to do mean you guys have clear memories before 15.

#ask #ask meme #<3 <3 <3

46 notes · View notes

gaycrashbandicoot · 2 months

Text

I don't know why (actually i know exactly why) cis white gay men act like they are the face of the lgbt community or the be all and end all of the lgbt community. to some extent cis white lesbians as well. whenever someone posts anything lgbt the cis white gay men love saying "I'm gay but this doesn't apply to me" to distance themselves from us so they can be one of the normals and we are the weird freaks.

like someone posted on smth recently how a pride parade wasn't gonna go ahead in their city and a cis white gay man commented "I'm gay but I think the government should spend the money on better things" like. okay ??? its not for you.

also even more infuriatingly that Instagram account that posts news with the spongebob fish made a post saying that Joe Biden has declared trans day of visibility is on the 31st March and people are pissed bcs its the same day as Easter. which is so not a news story because Joe Biden didn't declare shit, trans day of visibility has always been the 31st March, Joe Biden didn't invent it also who the fuck cares, Easter is on a different day every year and trans ppl being visible is not gonna ruin ur Easter plans fuckheads. but anyway so many cis white gay men in the comments were like "this is so unnecessary we already have pride month" or "I'm gay but this wokeism has gone too far"

I know this is very much a foot on the ladder of privilege and automatically push other people down type shit but cis white gay men don't just have a foot on the ladder they have been on the ladder and push the rest of us down while complaining about being oppressed. not to make this the oppression Olympics and shit but cis white gay men being the most privileged queer ppl with the most rights and the most support but still being the face of the lgbt community is what leads to things like gay marriage being seen as the be all and end all of lgbt rights and pride being seen as a party rather than a protest but what a fucking nightmare all round.

48 notes · View notes

yellowloid · 7 months

Text

my experience at am's show (3arena, dublin, 15/10/2023)

starting to write this post while stuck waiting at the airport, after somehow managing to get rid of my sleep deprivation headache through an overpriced orange juice. (edit: it's been two days and i'm stuck at home with a cold and it's all their fault) (jk) (i mean i guess that's giving me an incentive to finish writing this post so yknow. silver linings)

i'm sorry in advance because i know this is gonna be super long (and probably less cheerful than my other recap posts because i'm opinionated) but i swear i'm gonna try and not be insufferable (said as i obviously lie)

• SO let's start off by saying that we made it right in time for the start of miles' set (we were looking for our seats as he came on stage) and thank god because i was shitting myself and almost throwing up thinking we were gonna be late bc the bus we were supposed to take never showed up and we had to take another one. we literally SPRINTED up the stairs once we were in and heard he was coming up

• seeing miles open for them was moral compensation for his milan concert that i wasn't able to attend despite having tickets in 2022

• he had a very short time slot as usual with opening bands :/ and unfortunately that led to everything feeling a bit rushed :( like i'm not sure how he's been playing songs like cry on my guitar or the wonder at his latest gigs but they were SO DAMN FAST like please slow down i want to let my fav omb song sink in 😭

• still i absolutely LOVED his set, especially colour of the trap (which was AMAZING live), rearrange, come closer and inhaler. his energy was through the roof, he was literally buzzing and if you can already see how much he loves performing via video, it absolutely shines through when you see it live like. bro's literally a ball of light and energy and like. the sun personified l??? he's got so much charisma and a great stage presence. he was all smiles and really really tried to get the crowd hyped. loved him loved his set

• speaking of the crowd. it was absolute bullshit they had ZERO idea how lucky they were to have tickets to one of those four dates and how iconic it was that mk was opening for am after all these years. or maybe they just didn't care idk but i swear to god it wasn't even the usual "crowd who's not interested in the opening act" which. again. do you know how lucky you are you're seeing them both on the same night. don't let yourself be fooled by that cott video with the phonelights on, that was the only thing they did to show miles at least the tiniest bit of support - they were fucking dead otherwise, which is so weird because if you know am at more than a surface level you most likely know who miles is, and you probably know at the very least some of his songs... and yet they were so fucking quiet it was honestly painful to witness. most people there really had no idea how much lore was behind those gigs and it shows

• but again, it wasn't even that they weren't interested in the opening act. because they were fucking dead even during the main set. my section was full of drunk guys who were kinda hyped but very annoying (we'll come back to this later) but even in the pit which is supposed to be the most active area it looked like everyone was asleep and woke up at random times remembering they were at a concert and they were supposed to cheer and sing and just act accordingly ??¿¿??

• not even dancefloor or diwk managed to wake them up......DIWK. that's like. the song that's guaranteed to make the ground shake. i've seen am three times this year and in both paris and rome the crowd was usually only dead during the car songs (and tbhc depending on the song) - but they were INSANELY active during other songs, both oldies and classics. but this crowd was so disappointing literally snork mimimi-ing their way through the show

• anyway. miles should have played wrong side of life just for me and he also had the opportunity to do the funniest shit ever and play killing the joke or see ya when i see ya but alas one cannot have everything

• he did do something very......interesting during cry on my guitar (and i think also during one man band? but i'm not sure). my guy pointed at the mirrorball while singing "late night, all night, miss your kiss" which was kinda insane and i lost my mind a little but anyway

• as we all know there was no tlsp because he removed aviation first and then sntm which particularly hurt because he did it just a couple of hours before the show and when i saw that i just Knew. i knew shit was rapidly going downhill but still i was holding out my hope!!! i thought well there's still 505 or maybe they're saving sntm for later!!! i chose to keep being delusional!!! and boy was i about to get slapped in the face!!!

• now before we talk about am's set allow me to tell you a funny story. as i said my section was full of men who were very hyped (especially for wpsia/fwn/am songs) and the guy right next to me in particular (who was there with some other male friends) was, to put it shortly, a fucking annoyance. i was there with my brother and as we were waiting for the start of am's set he went to get us some water; so i was there alone minding my own business when the guy next to me immediately started hitting on me (he literally waited for my brother to leave bc he probably thought he was my bf lmao real smooth man). he was trying to make conversation asking me where i came from or things about the band, if it was my first time seeing them and what song did i think they were gonna open with and internally i was like BITCH who do you think i am. i literally know their setlist by heart. you and me are not the same

when i told him sculptures was gonna be the opener he was like 'mmmm idk' and i was like shut the fuck up. he was so condescending and patronizing about it and mentally i was like honey trust me we're not the same kind of fans i know much more than you do. anyway spoiler: of course they opened with sculptures

(he was also from england and told me he saw them in london at emirates stadium and when i asked him if he saw them on THE night when miles joined them he was like 'haha no' at which i was mentally like bro you didn't even see them on the right night why are you pestering me with your lame ass attempts at hitting on me. and he was so close too and already tipsy and basically just a stereotypical english dudebro and i swear the whole scene literally looked like this

but anyway then my brother came back and he finally shut up

• the problem is. this guy and his friends then started chugging on their beers and getting really drunk and the whole show this fucking idiot had no idea what personal space was because he kept invading my section and kept moving around drunkenly and i couldn't even fully enjoy the concert because i was so fucking scared i was gonna get elbowed in the face sooner or later, and i even tried to push him off because he kept bumping into me with his clumsy ass drunk moves but he just kept fucking being a nuisance the whole show and i really really wanted him gone from planet earth <3

• this went on to the point that i was dreading the fast and more active songs because this guy would just start being really frantic and overexcited and i literally feared for my life but even during the calmer songs he was fucking annoying like bruh. i appreciate the enthusiasm but i promise you don't have to throw it back to cornerstone like calm the fuck down or at least back off and stay in your fucking lane or i swear i'm gonna bite your head off

• anyway now let's talk about the actual show

• let me start by saying that yes i may have some complaints but regardless of everything it was (as always) a fucking great show. no doubt about that. i very much enjoyed it and i'm also very happy we were the first crowd to experience the strings live. i definitely got some better setlists (rome's lives in my head rent free), but it is what it is. beautiful show but well, it's always a beautiful show with them and we all know that. i may have mixed feelings about some things but these are just my opinions so please don't come at me lmao

• about the setlist: i definitely would've appreciated if we got a bit more tbhc (we only got the title track and that was it... i mean at least i got to hear it live, for the first time if i remember correctly, but still..... i'm mourning the loss of 4/5 and star treatment) (we didn't even get the iwby x star treatment x jet skis mashup which i was really sad about because i LOVE that mashup and i would've loved to hear it again); for the car, i'm so happy i got to hear hello you (we'll talk about this more later) but i also would've loved to hear perfect sense again because </3 sir that's my emotional support favourite the car song </3

• i was also thinking we'd get a bit more wpsia since originally it was the uk&ireland tour and back in june they played some more songs from that album, also because usually the closer they get to home, the more they go back to the origins... i was so hoping for mardy bum, a certain romance or ritz but instead we only got the view from the afternoon (not complaining about that tho) and dancefloor (please for the love of god remove that song from the setlist forever thank you very much)

• also if you want to give us sias (good) then why would you choose to give us don't sit down.........give us hellcat.......give us the title track........anything but That One...................

• however i got my beloved cornerstone (<3), 505 with the new string outro (but at what cost) and also all the car songs with the orchestra so that's a win

• as usual the crowd was kinda dead during the car and tbhc songs but again. they were already dead so they only became more dead during those songs

• they didn't really interact that much with the crowd, nor with each other; alex limited himself to the usual ("good evening dublin", "how you feeling/are you enjoying us dublin", "thank you", a couple of "terrific" here and there but that was it) + he did a shout out to jamie during cornerstone ("it's jamie cook here on his electric guitar!") and i think they scissored at some point during the body paint outro

• the transition from teddy picker into crying lightning was absolute FIRE my ass was shaking

• now for some silly antics

• after the piano interlude before high he said "why'd you only call me when you're high........" in the lowest saddest way ever as he usually does. okay man 😃👍

• he introduced arabella by going "i'll tell you about a girl that i made up......real character......arabella" like bruh we got it we understand you totally made her up and she's 100% not real like i promise we Get It we really do. why do you always feel the need to reinforce that why are you so adamant about it ESPECIALLY when in the presence of a certain someone......you're so sus

• "and it sounds like..........THIS" before the arabella guitar solo. literal chills

• "let's bring this party down to the cornerstone.........woah 😯"

• he always adds this thing during cornerstone i remember he also did it in rome and then i forgot to post the clip but i swear i never understand what he's saying i've seen some people transcribe it as 'ken barlow' but to me it sounds more like 'jenny ballow' or smth like that which doesn't make sense either way but still. does anyone know what i'm talking about and wtf he's on about

• nothing to say about cornerstone. beautiful beautiful beautiful as always <3 he also did the "squeezed me very tightly" bit that he always does and it was the cutest thing

• he sang the last line of the song so cuntily it was like. 'yes 😗 you can call me anything 😏 you want 💅' if it slayed

• after the song ended there was a moment of silence after which he went "......they kept in touch" and i felt the need to put him in a blender and drink him whole

• "from our first LP wpsiatwin, the view from the afternoon......."

• he got on his knees during pretty visitors. where he belongs

• we also got knee socks but there was something wrong because his voice cracked multiple times on the higher notes, he didn't even finish singing some lines - he just stopped, shook his head and then tried the next one... idk what was happening but he really looked like he was struggling during that song :(

• at the end of fluorescent adolescent he sang "remember when you used to be a rascal....... ~do you remember?~" which i saw he also did at last night's show and idk man that was kinda sus

• the strings were absolutely amazing showstopping spectacular and really put a nice ribbon on the songs they were used for (especially 505 and hello you) but that just makes things even more infuriating because why did they only get the whole orchestra there for the last four shows which weren't even originally supposed to happen.......... are you telling me if alex hadn't caught laryngitis we never would've have got them or what. like what's up with that

• anyway up until this point despite the lack of sntm i was still a sweet naive summer child who had some hopes left for 505. but the moment the music started playing without miles having been introduced to join them i knew. i knew we wouldn't get shit

• the 505 outro with strings was amazing tho......so melancholy and beautiful and just sososo pretty i loved it. would've loved it even more if miles and alex smooched right there and then

• as i said the crowd was dead even during diwk which was absolutely embarrassing lmao like wtf. not only was i the only one popping my pussy to the car and tbhc songs i also was the only one doing it to the most basic ahh song (still a banger tho it's always so powerful live 10/10)

• i can't believe the biggest milex interaction we got was alex saying "let's hear it for miles kane" right before body paint... i nearly lose my mind there and he literally just said his name (not a dedication like some people said) but i mean. that was at least acknowledging each other so i'll take that (said as i rip my hair out and bite my tongue and roll on the floor hitting myself)

• i was so delusional at that point when i heard he said his name i thought well maybe they're gonna be random and he's gonna join for body paint!!!!! which in hindsight i'm like. girl do you have any idea how insane you sound rn

• "thank you for having us dublin, it's been lovely" said with the most 'i'd rather be anywhere else than here rn' face and tone ever :/

• btw his little HA! was very <3<3<3 and at some point he was like scratching his head in such a cute way i almost forgot how mad at him i was (emphasis on almost)

• "just a trace....... just a trace....... just a traaaaaaceeeeeee....... just. a. trace. on your legs~ and on your arms~ and on your face........ your faceeeeee"

• when they left the stage before the encore the crowd was shouting "one more song" but all i wanted to hear was "miles, miles, miles fucking kane" because who knows maybe that would've shook them up and they'd spontaneously decide to call him on for the encore (incredibly delusional)

• hello you as the encore opener was fire, i'm so glad i got to hear it live AND with the strings too, it sounded just like the recorded version and you could hear the improvement in the live version so clearly compared to when they first debuted it; the mirrorball still hadn't dropped and since i haven't been watching many videos from the north american tour i was like ??? i thought it was maybe malfunctioning bc only the little one at the back was shining before but them BOOM the main girl dropped during hello you and it was crazy beautiful!!!!!

• "i bet that YOU look good on the dancefloor, dublin"

• at the end of the show he was blowing and catching kisses, they were bowing and waving to the crowd and that's when i realised it was my last time seeing them this tour and you could see the exact moment my heart cracked i was desperately hoping they'd never leave that stage </3

• it was an amazing night but it very much left me with a bittersweet taste in my mouth - because, as i've been saying, the vibes felt so off and i don't even know why. i can't exactly point out what was wrong, because really we have no idea what goes on behind the scenes; and i'm not even talking about it through a milex lens or smth like that. i mean, i was absolutely disappointed that nothing happened - no sntm, no 505, nothing -, but when i say the vibes were off i don't mean it in a demon way. i'm talking about the band. they really looked like they didn't want to be there, probably because they're tired and burnt out and can't wait for the tour to be over so that they can have a much-needed break. they must be exhausted and i get that, i really do; but still. it was a bit disappointing and i hate that i can't fully put my finger on why it felt that way, what was wrong, why did everything feel so rushed and why the well-oiled machine feeling translated into 'we're gonna play this show so soullessly it's gonna fly by more quickly' but it really felt that way. also mind you, i'm not even saying this as the 'tumblr fan who follows every show they play and knows all their antics by heart so that's why she notices perfectly normal things no one else notices' (like i remember the discourse back when they played glastonbury, and that really made sense because ofc casual fans are not gonna notice everything we notice) - but no, i'm not doing this that way. because my brother, who's very much a casual fan who knows nothing about the lore or the usual way they play shows (he saw them with me in paris so he had some kind of basic for comparison but that's it) said THE EXACT SAME THING. he agreed that the vibes felt very off, he also had to listen to me angrily ranting about it all the way back to the hotel and once again he agreed that the show felt, to put it very simply, kinda weird.

• now speaking of miles not joining them... the fact that he removed sntm at the very last minute was one of the sussiest thing he's ever done because why would he even add it to the initial setlist only to remove it just before the first show. it literally doesn't make any sense but i'm choosing to believe there were some technical problems out of their control, no time to rehearse or something like that... they're still best friends and if they weren't okay they wouldn't even have asked miles to open for them. i do find it weird and stupid that they'd miss this opportunity and i'm so angry at them for being dumb and not doing anything with it (unless something happens tomorrow), i'm very much heartbroken and my mind was and still is wandering trying to find more or less rational or delusional reasons why they didn't do it. i was drowning in grief after the show and the day after because i simply couldn't wrap my head around it all, but that's on me for having expectations i guess. i know they're still best friends. they're also never beating the divorce allegations. the two things can and should coexist when you're in an obsessive codependent homoerotic friendship and you're constantly having filthy telepathic sex with each other

• someone please get them to therapy or lock them in a room and throw away the key until they talk and sort their shit out and it stinks of sloppy nasty make-up sex in there because at this point it feels like we're fucking intruding on their fucked up psychosexual games and i'm SO TIRED of being a child of divorce. please we know you know everyone knows you're obsessed with each other just stop being insane (barely acknowledging each other) and start being insane (having crazy gay sex again). i promise all your problems would be solved if you just fucked each other into oblivion like the good old days

• ANYWAYS. i'm still kinda sad and angry over the way the show unfolded and it's not really helping that it's dawning on me that there's only one show left and then they're gonna disappear for god knows how long. i still loved the show, don't get me wrong, and i'm very grateful i got to see them again before the end of the tour and also to see miles for the first time during the same night. i do feel very lucky and despite the fact that we got no tlsp reunion or 505, the fact that miles was opening for them after YEARS of this not happening is still very much history in the making. iconic in and of itself. i'm also happy i got to visit and fall in love with a new city, i'm missing dublin so much and i miss THEM so much and i'm feeling so sad and bittersweet and heartbroken and ugh. i swear i can't even explain it to the full and i can't believe the tour is almost over </3 but that's a thought for another post..........

• for now i just want to see what happens at the last show and enjoy it to the full because yes we might have complained about some stuff along the way (i know i just did it myself lmao) but it's been such an amazing and memorable tour i just wish it'd never end </3

#i don't even know what to say in the tags like. they got me speechless this time i guess i can only shut up #i'm gonna add some more thoughts if i manage to get them in a coherent written form but that's it for now #they're such fucking idiots but they're MY idiots and i'm afraid i love them too dearly #(is also still pissed at them and can't bear thinking about them too deply rn)#arctic monkeys #alex turner #miles kane #the car tour #dublin night 1 #my show

65 notes · View notes