#some of u genuinely don’t give a fuck about whether or not there’s anything of interest or merit within a work just as long as it’s gay

[splorpo]

What are you hating on lately? Not judging I want to join you

can we kiss on the mouth

#I JEST I JEST my actual answer rn is people who are into our flag means death and good omens are driving me up the wall #i am willing to entertain that either show might be good but the way people talk about them is so goddamn annoying that it has guaranteed #i won’t be watching them anytime soon #all i hear is ‘uwu my gay babies’ this and ‘uwu my gay babies’ that #can we PLEASE start liking things for reasons other than there are gay characters. PLEASE. #some of u genuinely don’t give a fuck about whether or not there’s anything of interest or merit within a work just as long as it’s gay #stop recommending me shit just bc it’s gay #is it also GOOD? did u think of that?? #these types of people appear to be the primary fanbase of these two shows #and were also annoying as fuck during the writer’s strike #genuinely makes me ask what year it is #it’s like superwholock in here #splorpo answers

[badchoicesworld]

Can I request headcanons of Hobie Brown reacting to his gn s/o being startled when he kisses them whether it's on the lips or even on the cheek or forehead? Not only do they never kiss anyone because they never dated anyone before him, the slightly cold feeling of his lip piercing surprises them! Does this makes sense XD *Cough* totally not me about his lip piercing * Cough*

hobie notices how startled you get when he kisses you (gn!)

hobie brown x gn! reader

established relationship

hello i’m here to be ur bad influence, get a lip piercing if u want one, become the hobie brown in this scenario

warnings: none

pairing: hobie brown x gn! reader

requests: open, i wont be caught lacking

it was a moment of weakness

★⋆ ⋆☆⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆☆⋆⋆★✧

ok so i think that we all agree on hobie being very into physical contact and touchy feely

it’s nice to have a reminder that someone’s there for you physically, things like leaning on each other of just linking a finger while walking are super significant to him cause it shows you’re not afraid of being close together, y’know ? i image that’s pretty crucial to him if he’s ever in a relationship

at the same time, if it’s not present from the start, i think he’d be more than willing to teach someone what it’s liked to be physically loved and appreciated

he doesn’t know what’s gone off in your life, if your lack of experience is due to some sort of trauma or it’s as simple as you’ve never had the chance to be close to someone in that way, he won’t hold it against you

maybe tease and taunt you a bit

he’s definitely respectful and drops topics like a pin if prompted, and will easily respect personal space if anyone ever seems a uncomfortable by his closeness

no questions asked, he’s unbothered and keeps his hands to himself

if you seem a lil peeved more than anything he’s probably a bit more persistent cause he’s a cocky bastard at times

but if you express that you wanna be close to him but just aren’t used to it, man’s all over it

not all over you though, he won’t rush you

this shit boutta be GRADUAL and LOVING

ANYWAY to the actual scenario

there’s no way you’ve managed to avoid the magnet of affection that is hobie brown, but if things like arms around your shoulder and waist, hugs and cuddles don’t bother you then he’s unsuspecting for now

but if one day you’re just chilling, doing your own thing

maybe in spider society if you hang there, perhaps at either of ur cribs

and hobie just passively walks by or maybe you two have been hanging out all day

he sees you busy, wants to remind you he’s there

gives you the quickest little muah ever on ur temple or smthn

it’s casual to him, but he sees how ur expression immediately changes to a slightly started one, mixed with whatever else you’re feeling in that moment

it crosses his mind that you two have literally never kissed which is wild, now he’s amused by this revelation and is like “what?” (whot) while scheming and plotting in his head

you have your own reaction (or lack of) and hobie’s mildly entertained depending on it

just mad flustered ? he will weaponise this

if you seem genuinely uncomfortable by it then hobie’s gonna apologise and just wait for you to bring it up again before tryna kiss you again, he’s unbothered

if you explain that it’s just the piercing that caught you off guard and how cold it was, he’s laughing

like yeah, valid

likely knows he’s your first s/o or whatever you call yourselves, but you’ll tell him again that he’s your first

grins at all the innuendos he could make but voices none of them

you’re fine with it ? the coldness just caught you off guard ?

cue him wrapping both of his lanky ass arms tightly around your shoulders and just smothering the side of your face in kisses, really making sure that his cool lip piercing is making contact each time

he loves to be a fucking nuisance

irrelevant but i think hobie has a tongue piercing, anyway

even if you eventually get used to kisses, he still loves to see your reaction to the sudden freezing cold piercing

especially in the mornings, cackles when he watches you try to withdraw from him in the morning because of how cold his piercings are

imagine what it’s like when he fuckin nuzzles his face into you

two eyebrow piercings, one nose ring, lip ring- personally i would cease to a exist if i’m in that groggy state and that cold ass metal even grazes me, i’m gone and never coming back

he’ll sometimes kiss you just for your reactions, you aren’t safe

easily his favourite spot is the neck, imagine putting on a freezing cold necklace

yeah, it feels like that when he kisses you a certain way

in conclusion, your reactions enable him, please stop

★⋆ ⋆☆⋆ ☠︎︎ ⋆☆⋆⋆★✧

#across the spiderverse #headcanon #spider man: across the spider verse #hobie brown #hobie spiderverse #atsv hobie #imagine #oneshot #ask #hobie brown x gn!reader #hobie brown x reader #spider punk #hobie x reader

[starrylayle]

Soman’s failed POC and Queer rep in the SGE saga — And why criticism is essential to the movie (franchise)

[repost]

Before I start though, I’d like to say that if you have any argument about forced representation, dni. I don’t give a shit that ur faves aren’t white anymore — and please stop fucking harassing Soman and the cast about this non-issue.

Now onto the racial criticism of Soman’s work, which I don’t see talked enough about.

Being a person of colour does not mean you are exempt from racial criticism. I’m sure this is known by now, but in the books, literally everyone is white. Like EVERYONE. And not only that, the beauty standards he portrays and tries to critique (but then fails miserably at unfortunately) are so Eurocentric it’s quite disheartening actually - pale skin, small noses, coloured eyes, etc. The themes are also quite Eurocentric as well — if you had told me that the books were written by a white author, I would believe you.

Now, I’ve always given him the benefit of the doubt here, considering he was writing a middle grade series as a marginalised author, which was a lot more difficult at the time, and because he does genuinely try to improve his POC rep in the later books (even if that does include retconning character’s previous descriptions lol). In that same vein, the cast is also noticeably more diverse, and I truly applaud Soman for that. However, he has not said anything in regards to the racism the cast have been getting, which considering his influence on the fandom, would have been much appreciated. (The only casting choice he actually spent some time defending was brunette Tedros 💀💀 — like mate, get your priorities together!). Also, since whiteness is quite intrinsic to the core themes of the story (I’ll make a separate post on that later), I worry that the movie will unintentionally be pushing it. And if that’s the case, people should be allowed to critique this (hypothetical) poor depiction of race, without it being considered racist. (As previously mentioned — this excludes those fucking weirdos who just hate on the cast coz their faves aren’t white anymore 🙄🙄)

Ok so, in regards to the queer-coding/queer-baiting:

Just like being a POC doesn’t mean u can’t have internalised racism, being queer doesn’t mean u can’t have internalised homophobia, especially to other members of the community. I don’t know why exactly Soman struggles with writing queer rep so much (I mean I can understand in 2013 — but now plenty of middle grade books include queer characters), but he barely has any canon gay rep.

Tristan/Yara, who is not even specified whether they are gay or trans, is one of the first characters to die, with absolutely no resolution to their arc whatsoever - and their queerness is never mentioned again. The next confirmed queer couple are two backgrounder guys who barely have any significance to the story. The couple after that are two evil white boys, who are only confirmed to be queer after they both die. They are are the only relevant gay characters at this point — yet ofc they’re dead, white and evil. This wouldn’t be a problem if there were other (good) queer characters, but since that is not the case, it just comes off as rather… icky.

Now notice how all these couples, as poorly written as they are, are all (white) gay men? There are hints that Hester and anadil might be in a relationship, but it’s never explicitly confirmed.

In addition, sophie and Agatha are explicitly queer coded — (I made a post about it on my acc for anyone’s interested) — they even kiss!! Of course people are going to be mad that they were baited into a relationship that ended up being incesteous! Especially, ESP, considering that Agatha is now a Black girl in this adaptation. We barely see any white canon wlw couples in media — Black sapphics are almost unheard of in the mainstream, especially as leads. first kill, one show that featured a Lesbian Black girl lead (a Dark-skinned one at that!)— got cancelled. And this happens all the time. Lesbians/sapphics, esp sapphics of colour, ESP Balck sapphics are barely given any time of day in our media in favour of centring gay white men in queer narratives, and thus they have every right to be upset at the queer baiting.

I’m not Black, but as a queer woman of colour, Agatha’s character has always been very special to me. I’ve always thought she should be a POC considering how different her and her mum are from the rest of her cookie-cutter village, and queer because she did not fit into conventional notions of femininity. It would be so awesome to see Agatha, a queer woman of colour, as the lead in a high-budget fantasy series. But alas, that is too many marginalised identities for the general audience.

Not only that, the twin reveal was just plain bad writing. It had absolutely no bearing at the story whatsoever and is never mentioned again. It was just done purely for shock value, and for that, I will absolutely critique Soman.

I know that this discourse is tired and worn out — and understandably so, it’s been years. However, now that this movie is approaching mainstream — At worst, this queer baiting can already add to the whole ‘lesbian relationships aren’t serious’ and other terrible stereotypes. At best, it deprives sapphics of much needed representation in mainstream fantasy films.

Remember, unlike with the books, we as fans have the power to influence the story. If the creators see how unpopular the twist is with the public, they can probably change it. We can make a difference! Btw, this doesn’t mean sophie and Agatha should be endgame — I’d like for them to be in a short term relationship and be confirmed as canonically queer — Tagatha can still be the end couple! (Not hophie tho, coz sophie is a lesbian and I despise Hort lol).

#the school for good and evil #sge #agatha of woods beyond #sge movie #representation #school for good and evil #agaphie #sophie of the woods beyond #the school for good and evil movie #agatha of the woods beyond #tagatha #sophie x agatha #representation matters #lesbian #bisexual #gay #queer #idk why Soman refused to give us queer rep #in the og series #but we have a chance to change that now !! #my stuff #sge movie spoilers

[thatanimewriter]

THIS, IS A WORK OF ART.

➳ request: Hello, can I request some headcanons for Free! boys' reaction when they see their s/o wearing revealing clothes? Soft or suggestive it's up to you. Thank you for doing my request 💘

➳ character/s: nanase haruka, tachibana makoto, ryugazaki rei, hazuki nagisa, matsuoka rin

➳ warnings: swearing, suggestiveness, dumb tiktok references

➳ notes: i decided to tell this through stupid tiktok audios and then jump into what they actually do. this is fluff, crack, and suggestive so beware for chaos. this post will expose my tiktok fyp..

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 / 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭  / 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬 / 𝐰𝐢𝐩 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭  

── 𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐒𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐔𝐊𝐀.  

‘what on earth, is going on... in the house of commons?’

he probably came back from, like

a swimming practice

n he’s tired

he doesn’t have the mental capacity to comprehend this

and just... stares

like

you’ve genuinely broken him

but when he does return to earth

he puts his team japan swimming jacket over your shoulders

and continues to stare at you before asking you to just come to bed with him

with a small pout on his lips

and you can’t say no

so this outfit remains for his eyes only

though idk how much sleeping you’ll be getting tbh

── 𝐓𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐀 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐎𝐓𝐎.  

‘i am calm... i am relaxed... i am a happy tree... YOU ARE MAKING IT VERY HARD TO BE A HAPPY TREE >:((’

he’s trying just to keep it together

and you’re making it difficult

for him not to freak out

and ask you - very panicked - if you plan on going out like that

he’s not gonna stop you if you were

but he’s concerned for creepers on the street

and he doesn’t want you feeling uncomfortable ;v;

he’s very much worried for your safety because he doesn’t trust others

you are indeed making it hard for him to be a happy tree

because you’ll send him into a spiral of anxiety

he can’t deny you look absolutely fucking amazing

so he does give you a lil extra attention

just a lil bit

to convince you to stay with him and the cats in the neighbourhood

── 𝐑𝐘𝐔𝐆𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐊𝐈 𝐑𝐄𝐈.  

‘it can get weirder. i just washed my hands, that’s why they’re wet... no other reason.’

THIS BITCH WAS READING SMUT

he looks between you and the book over and over again with a bright red blush

covers his face with said book

and is conflicted about whether he try to cover his crotch

or not draw attention to it

when you do point it out

S T U T T E R I N G

he cannot explain it to you coherently

if he does

it sounds so sketchy

and entirely unbelievable

because he failed to keep anything undercover

so here you are, wrapped in blankets he draped over you

lookin like a gremlin

── 𝐇𝐀𝐙𝐔𝐊𝐈 𝐍𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐒𝐀.  

‘on a scale of one to ten, my friend, you’re fucked :))’

he will 100% join you

playing dress up is his JAM

he comes back wearing a crop top and mini skirt

some thigh high socks (you don’t know where he found those-)

and takes his phone out to take photos with you

then he pushes you away to the bedroom-

to cuddle you to keep you from going out looking too good for the people

get your mind out of the gutter

but if you do want to go out somewhere like that

he’ll come with

just so he can say

‘they’re staring at US, babe’

what an icon

he would never let you do anything on your own

── 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐎𝐊𝐀 𝐑𝐈𝐍.  

‘MOMMY DON’T KNOW DADDY’S GETTING HOT-’

the most sexual one

you’re not walking the next day

the FATTEST smirk you’ve ever seen

and a very husky murmur in your ear

plus some roaming hands

‘where do you think you’re goin?’

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

you’re done for

sorry not sorry

your neighbours hate you

he will ask you to wear it again

especially after you guys get a thorough session in

because he can see all the hickeys and marks along your skin

and this bitch is PROUD

what an attractive asshole

#free #free iwatobi swim club #nanase haruka #tachibana makoto #ryugazaki rei #hazuki nagisa #matsuoka rin #free x reader #free iwatobi swim club x reader #nanase haruka x reader #tachibana makoto x reader #ryugazaki rei x reader #hazuki nagisa x reader #matsuoka rin x reader #free imagines #free iwatobi swim club imagines #nanase haruka imagines #tachibana makoto imagines #ryugazaki rei imagines #hazuki nagisa imagines #matsuoka rin imagines

[desmond69miles]

YOOOO =3

can we get sfw + nsfw headcannons of ink demon bendy with a s/o with a really gothic style & is selectively mute? ( bonus points if Sammy constantly bugs them )

im genuinely curious abt how u would think abt it :0

[ take ur time answering this!! no rush at all by the way!! ; also sorry if my grammars kinda bad iys 3:37 am where im at rn + sry if i seem hyper to im just rlly excited rn😭

i’ve been gone for butt fuck long, my bad! I'm in the process of moving and lifes been a bit hectic. Hopefully im back now!

anyway, thank you anon for the bendy ask!! love writing for this inky-ass man.-

NSFW is under the cut!

-

[-: If we were to give bendy preferences, I know he'd go for a gothic s/o who is on the chubbier side. I say chubbier because A) body warmth, Bendy's a cold-blooded creature and he liked the feeling of your warm body and B) He likes your squishy thighs and tummy. And I know he’d be attracted to the darker, more gothic style. Inky black colors, blood red dresses, he likes the colors. 

[-: I think the ink demon would be good with someone that was mute or had periods of time where they were mute. Whether it be due to anxiety, overstimulation, or you just don’t have many words one day, I think he’d be understanding and would work around it. For many years, he didn’t have a voice, resorting to scribbling messy letters on walls and papers to communicate. If you want to talk while your mute, he’d simply lend you his hand so you can scribble on the wall with it; or he’ll carry around a sketchbook for you to write in, but more often than not he just makes you write with his claws. 

[-: I like the idea of Sammy bugging you all the time because he's interested in your music. It's so different from a classical tune, the drums and guitar, the vocals. He’d constantly be asking about your music. And since goth is a music-based subculture, you have a lot of music to show Sammy. 

[-: Going back to Bendy liking your style, he’d fiddle around with your clothing or accessories. He likes the bling of your necklaces and rings, and often plays with them when you are sitting together. He tries not to break anything, but accidents happen when you have sharp claws. If you do rat-nest hair, rest assured Bendy is curious on how you get your hair to do that. 

[-: I feel like Bendy would find you some victorian or romantic gothic outfits around the studio. He likes taking you to the costume department and letting you run around, picking up some of the black clothing used for character study. Another thing is that he collects small trinkets he think you would think is cool. Sometimes it’s a small rock, other times its a shiny gem he found in a pipe. 

[-: Bendy and Sammy get into a lot of fights around you, for your attention. Sammy wants to learn more about your subculture and what you remember from the outside world while Bendy wants to draw or walk around the studio with you. Good luck time managing. 

[-: Bendy is very interested in your makeup. Please let him draw on you! Speaking of drawing, he also likes to sketch you. His drawings are a bit blotchy and inky due to his skin, and often he'll mess up on a part by lingering too long and having ink form a puddle.

NSFW

[-: He chokes you with your necklaces, not to the point of them breaking but just enough so the chains and pearls dig into your throat.

[-: oh my god he loves your thigh highs. He nibbles around the soft flesh, forked tongue darting around and leaving opaque trails of ink behind. Just no promises that he won’t tear the thin fabric off!!

[-: Relating to the one where he draws on you, he’d love to lightly drag his claws over your stomach, back, or thighs and create delicate drawings onto your skin. Take this as a form of foreplay. (Which bendy isn’t exactly fond of, hes too impatient to go through it.)

[-: Bendy has a scent kink. I believe that he’s blind/has very poor eyesight and relies on noises and scent to find his prey. And his scent is very sensitive. He’ll ask if you can use non-strong soap or something that doesn’t upset his senses. Besides this, he likes to smell your clothing or even your undergarments.

Since i’m nice i’ll give you some elements of a fic i’m working on…

[-: Bendy’s ink that comes from his tentacles and/or cock act as an aphrodisiac. Providing a muscle relaxant and lube, it makes it easier for him to fit more and more of himself into you. He’s a big guy! Ranging at almost eight feet, it’s no surprise that he’s packing something big.

[-: Bendy’s big on CNC/Predator/Prey play. When you talk with him about safe words and the proper measures to have a safe time during CNC, Bendy gets really excited. He’s a demon, creatures of carnal lust and sin.

[-: He also loves to be worshipped. As Sammy has taught him, he’s somewhat of a god to this inky realm and he expects to be treated as one. Sammy does annoy him with his constant spouting, but he’s not opposed to you calling him Lord.

thank you for your request <3 My ask box is always open!! Feel free to send in batim requests.

#bendy and the dark revival #bendy smut #bendy x reader #bendy and the ink machine x reader #batim x reader #ink demon x reader smut #ink demon x reader #the ink demon

[theinfiknight]

On a similar vein as the other post, here is a list of top ten Bleach characters who fuck the LEAST, in descending other of how little they fuck. Again, this is based on vibes alone and not canon.

10) Renji

It's not that he hasn't got game!!! Renji is pretty hot, all said and done. It's just that he would probably collapse into a quivering wreck or straight up run the fuck away if anyone so much as looked at him romantically. Man could not muster up the nerve to ask someone out to save his life. This is a man who is forever doomed to want and be wanted without anything ever actually happening.

9) Urahara

This man is a human wreck far too traumatised to allow any genuine human connection, on top of being generally less organised than your average five year old. He'd respond to any interest by making a bad joke and then backflippng away. He'd probably break down into tears if exposed to any actual intimacy.

8) Byakuya

Wet blanket ass mf with the personality of a wet paper towel. Whatever charm he had died with his wife. If you asked him what his hobbies are he'd probably say some shit like "meditation" or "taxes". Anyone who initially thirsts after him in Seireitei immediately withers up inside after a single conversation. Itachi Uchiha ass mf.

7) Captain Unohana

Iirc she's a 1000 years older than everyone else except kyoraku, ukitake and genryuusai. And besides I don't think she'd be very interested in that sort of thing. Again though, this is just vibes.

6) Kenpachi Zaraki

This is the face of a man who does not give a single fuck about sex. Gokupilled Zorocore king. All he cares about is whether you can put up an entertaining fight. I very much doubt he'd give the time of day to anything else.

5) Ulquiorra

Hi my name is Ul'quiorra Quarto Espada Arrancar Cipher and I have powerful ebony black reiatsu (that’s how I got my rank) with purple streaks and green tattoos that reach my chin and icy green eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like L Death Note (AN: if u don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to Aizen-Sama but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m an arrancar but my hollow is smooth and round. I have pale white skin.

4) Kurotsuchi Mayuri

This man is a sex offender. He's on every registry that soul society has. Anyone with ANY self preservation instinct keeps far far far away from him. When he dies, I sincerely hope Nemu is the one who gets to kill him.

3) Chad-kun

Gay but more repressed than Sasuke Uchiha. This will never change.

2) Soi Fon

Girl, she doesn't like you back. She is never going to like you back. Get over it. Move on. Find something to do with your life.

1) Ichigo Kurosaki

Aroace king. No further notes.

#bleach #renji abarai #kisuke urahara #bleach ichigo #kenpachi zaraki

[phantomphangphucker]

Phic Phight - Sing-U-Lator

For: @thefalsefangirl @higgidigs @briarlovesu @bibliophilea @idiot-cheesehead-archenemy

Song inspiration: Addict - Vivziepop and Alastor’s Reprise - Vivziepop Vlad and Danny have a proper talk but it's not really a talk or proper

Danny roughs up his hair, frustrated, why did Lancer always have give such open-ended ‘up to your imagination’ projects? Sure Danny didn't lack creativity but his creativity wasn’t exactly… normal. Plus, how was he supposed to make a song prompt without ripping off Ember? Sometimes being friends with a singer was a major double edge sword.

He’s half tempted to just call Vlad, dude gave some solid advice… even if it sometimes seemed slightly sketchy. What would he know about this though? Maybe he writes poetry in his rich person free time?

Thumping his head on his desk a couple of times, fuck it. Flipping out his phone and leaning back, “hey yo, Vladdie”.

“Daniel? Is there an issue. I am rather… preoccupied at the moment”.

Danny snorts at that, “I’d say with what but you're still all mysterious half the time. Anyways, my homework isn’t home working. Know anything to do with music?”.

“… I’m beginning to believe that you have a very concerning sense of timing, my boy. I’ve rather recently… acquired a seemingly ectoplasm infused music generating bow tie”.

Danny blinks hard at that, not for the first time since meeting the man, Danny’s had the feeling Vlad had sticky fingers or something. Sure, Danny also stole stuff… and maybe did so more now than he used to -which now that he thinks about it, might be ever so slightly due to some Vlad-related encouragement. But that’s a thought for another day- but Vlad was way more sticky fingered. “Why? Though I guess that could just make my music prompt for me”.

Danny jumps at a sudden voice, “that could be quiet a good idea. You are rather bad at this”.

Danny whirls around, “eh yo, what the fuck?!?”.  It’s goddamn GhostWriter… Well at least it’s not Walker, or Boxy, or Skulker.

The GhostWriter seemingly ignores the teen, eyeing the paper instead, “you clearly have no love for the written word, as painful as that is, can’t have you embarrassing ghosts with your lack of lyrical diction”, summoning out his keyboard, fingers flying.

Danny groans loudly, “oh come on! Not this shit again”.

“Language, Daniel”.

The GhostWriter narrows his eyes at the phone, “and I would appreciate my artefact returned”.

And suddenly Danny gets hurtled out his window, half shrieking, “VLAAAAAAAD!”, angrily all the while. Granted… he couldn’t blame his -sometimes sketchy- mentor too much; Danny was usually the one who caused issues and Vlad certainly wasn’t immune to trouble making. Vlad yelping, “butter biscuits!”, on the other side of the line at least means this was probably going to be both of their problem(s).

The two halfas groan and push themselves up from the hard smooth ground.

So they weren’t outside on the dirt/grass. Good to know.

Danny grumbles, “I don’t know whether to blame you, blame GhostWriter, blame you, blame myself, blame you, or blame Lancer”.

Vlad giving a very dry reply, “funny, I was thinking something very similar”, then chuckling faintly, “perhaps halfas merely attract ill luck”, glancing around as he stands and brushes himself off, “we appear to be in some sort of cafe”.

“Ah fuck yes, tell me there’s coffee”.

“Language”, Vlad shakes his head, “you consume enough of that stuff to kill you a few times over”.

Danny snorts, “aw, you’d miss me”.

“But of course”. Vlad’s voice is genuinely fond, making Danny mutter, “I know it’s 🎶till death dooooo us part,  but we're already past that phase🎶”.

Both of them stop at that, Danny looks insanely confused and slightly pissed off; Vlad quirks a single eyebrow. Quirking another eyebrow at the bow tie, which is apparently tied around his wrist now, as it starts making music, a electronic piano beat, “I don’t think this is going to end well”.

Danny grumbling, “sounds like the story of my half life. Shit always so seems to be going south since the whole dyin’ while tryin’ to be helpful thing”.

Vlad eyes him, “but 🎶this could be a brand neeeew start🎶”, grimacing a little after because seriously?

Danny huffing, yeah sure the whole dying thing really legit could have effectively given him a new ‘lease on life’ as it were, but instead he’s just spending all of his time fighting and anxiously hiding his shit. Even if he legit honestly likes the way he is now, he had cool powers and stuff. Grumbling, “tell me about it. 🎶I think I deserve some praise for the way that I ammmmmmmm🎶”, gesturing around a bit ridiculously because he might as well just go along with this and no one else was actually here from the looks of It to witness this bullshit. Being a ghost was fucking great okay? Regardless of his parents anti-ghost ectophobia bullshit.

Vlad glances around and shrugs, he’s been involved in stranger, sitting down in a random chair, “🎶despite becoming a ghost, and ending up nearly comatose🎶”; Vlad was still baffled by how severe Danny’s portal-related accident was. The fact that his body survived getting blasted by an entire dimension worth of ectoplasm and being electrocuted by over four lightening bolts worth of electricity was impressive and a bit horrifying.

Danny rolls his eyes at that, flicking his wrist pointedly at Vlad as the bow tie adds in fucking finger snapping to its tune, “🎶I don’t give a daaaaaaaamnnnnnn🎶”, eyeing Vlad with a bit of a smirk, “what about you?”.

Vlad snorts and stands up, “🎶I let my emotions go, and fudge being a sober hoe🎶”. Danny looks a little scandalised by Vlad’s almost swearing but takes the offered flasks because at this point, fuck it.

The GhostWriter is one hundred percent manipulating this into a musical or some shit, and no one wants to deal with that shit fully sober.

The two taking steps, gesturing, and dancing a little while their hands are almost connected due to holding the flask. Singing together, “🎶this is the maaaantra, this is the liiiiife🎶”. Regardless of anything Danny liked the way he was and he damn well knew Vlad did too.

Separating and twirling, still singing together, “🎶we’re playing with our lives noooooow, till the end of every niiiiiiiight 🎶”.

Vlad eyeing his flask, “🎶eventually surrounded by fiiiire🎶”.

Danny laughing, “🎶my fighting passion igniiiights🎶”.

The two eyeing each other and grinning a little, “🎶a hit of the heaven and hell, a helluva hiiiiigh🎶”. At this point they were in this shit together, even if Danny had a feeling that Vlad was a less than stellar influence, and Vlad knew that Danny might one day force him to reconcile with his ‘old friends’.

Vlad turning away, “🎶I’m addddddicted to the madddddness🎶”, he knew damn well all the crime and less than legal stuff he did was something he got a massive rush from, and what did he care if he screwed a few people over for his own personal gain?

Danny turning away as well, “🎶this tooooown is my atlaaaaantis🎶”, this town, Amity Park, was his Everything and he was protective as Hell of it. It was nice that a lot of the town was starting to actually view him as their protector, made him feel like his purpose was actually being seen.

Vlad chuckles, eyeing Danny quickly, “you do a lot of rather illegal things to protect ‘this town’, you know”. Danny chuckling right back, “as if you don’t do the same to satisfy your possessiveness”.

Danny puts up a fist for a fist bump and Vlad rolls his eyes though supplies him with his requested fist bump, the two singing together again, “🎶we’re forever gonna have a fucking/fudging reason to sin🎶”.

Vlad glares at him a little over the swearing but everything help him if he didn't already know that Danny had a bit of a foul mouth and that it was kind of pointless to correct the boy. Besides, Danny’s ‘soul’ or whatever was a lot cleaner than his own, “🎶let me leaaaaaave my soul to burn🎶”,

Danny pointing at him agressively, “🎶I’ll be breathin’ it in🎶”, then making a face, “I mean that your mentorship is actually kinda good, not that I’m going to literally breath in your burnt ashes, what the fuck GhostWriter”, and glares at the ceiling; faint ghostly laughter could be heard.

Vlad can’t help grinning at that a little, “🎶and I’m addiiiicted to that feeeeeeling🎶”.

Danny gesturing up, “🎶then get hiiiiiigher than the ceiiiiiling🎶”.

Vlad nods curtly, because as not harmful as this was, it was still annoying.

The Ghostwriters voice comes down from the ceiling, “🎶and I’m neeeever gonna want this feeling to end, just conceeeeede and give in to you inner demons again🎶”.  Vlad fires a blast at the ceiling while the bow tie adds in a metallic drum beat for a bit before slowing to a more soft sound.

Danny eyes Vlad a little, “you know I know what you ‘inner demons’ are at this point, right? Your thing for mom?”, cringing and rubbing his neck, “and I mean sure,  🎶yeah, you fell in loooove. But-🎶”, gesturing at the flask, “🎶-you fell deeper in a piiit🎶”.

Vlad blinks, sure he knew Daniel would figure that out eventually but this was definitely not how he wanted that to come out. But what were ghosts if not their past regrets and obsessions? He couldn’t give up on her, not yet, maybe not ever. Throwing a hand out to the side and trying to hide that that comment hurt a little, “well 🎶Death didn’t get us aaabooove. So count your blessing because this is it🎶”, that came out more bitter than he really meant it.

Danny quirks an eyebrow at him and moving to get a bit in his face, “🎶sooooo you’re not letting goooOooOOOOoooOoo🎶?”.

Vlad shrugs, taking a swig from his flask and eyeing the musical bow tie with contempt, “🎶so what if I misbehave🎶”.

Danny huffing, crossing his arms, “🎶I guess it’s what everybody craves🎶”, then pointing at Vlad, “but, 🎶look around and you’ll already knooooOoOooOOOoow🎶”, pausing and rubbing his temples, “it ain’t gonna work out for you, you know”.

Vlad shrugs more vulnerably than he really means to, “I know, I really do. You think I can’t tell, Daniel? Meeting you and seeing them again makes that so clear. But-”, eyeing the boy, “-an apprentice changes a mentor as much as a mentor changes their apprentice”, holding out a hand, “🎶so, come if you’re feeling brave, and fancy yourself a mentor🎶”.  Bow tie beat picking back up again.

Danny chuckles, okay Vlad’s thing for mom was weird and would never work out but if Vlad was content to redirect himself towards mentoring Danny himself then who was Danny to argue against that? Heck! It was probably a really good thing, plus Vlad was -maybe? Possibly?- morally questionable enough that he wouldn’t take Danny’s shit but also wouldn’t question him about being socially unacceptable. “🎶you want it, I got it. See what you liiiikeeeeEEEeeEe🎶”.

Vlad nods, when he first met Danny and realised what he was, a fellow halfa, it was just a maze of endless possibilities. When he realised that Daniel not only formed as a ghost at a far higher ectoplasmic level but also had more room for growth, he was amazing. Daniel could beat Pariah some day, if he tried. Having that boy as his was far too tempting and far more enticing than any amount of money or Maddie. Daniel could take the world if he wanted, and Vlad could guide that, could stand beside him, “🎶we could have it allllllllll, by the end of any niiight🎶”. If Daniel tried he could probably take over the entire Infinite Realm today if he so desired.

Danny snorts, waving him off, “I can’t tell if you mean this world or the afterlife. But here it would be, 🎶your money and power🎶 and in the ghost zone it would definitely be, 🎶my sinful deliiiight🎶”, chuckling, “you know how much a lot of ghosts hate me at this point”. Him chuckling again, “🎶I’mma hit of that heaven and hell, a helluva hiiiiiigh🎶”.

Vlad can’t help chuckling himself at that, Daniel had managed to piss of an impressive amount of ghosts in a very short amount of time, “🎶it’s like you’re addiiiiicted to the maaaadeness🎶”.

Danny waving him off, “🎶this tooooown will always be my atlaaaaantis🎶”.

Vlad ruffles up his hair, “🎶we’re forever gonna have a fudging reason to sin🎶”.

Danny collapsing over a table dramatically, “🎶let me leave my soul to burn, I’ll be breathing it in🎶”; which Vlad rolls his eyes at.

Vlad pokes the boys forehead, “🎶you’re addiiiicted to the feeeeeeling🎶”, Daniel was more combative than Vlad would actually like. Obviously he didn’t really have to worry about Daniel getting hurt but it really was like he was addicted to getting into fist fights sometimes.

Danny bats his finger/hand off, “have you seen the amount of ghosts that show up to cause problems? It’s a perfect excuse to 🎶get hiiigheeer than the ceeeiliing, and I’m never gonna want that fucking feeling to end🎶”.

Vlad sticks his hands out to the side, “🎶so you’ll just concede and give into your feelings again🎶?”.

Danny glares at him and pushes himself up from laying down on the table, “oh like you don’t constantly, 🎶concede and give into your inner demons again🎶”.

The two stare at each other for a bit, definitely recognising that they were both a bit fucked up and their mentorship/apprenticeship thing was extremely all kinds of fucked up. But neither of them could deny that it was good, they bounced off of each other and called out each others shit. They were both better for it. Vlad’s Obsession over Maddie had dwindled some and Danny had an actual adult to turn to. It was good, they both needed this more than either one was willing to admit.

Then the GhostWriter decides to be an asshole again, piping up from the ceiling again, “🎶you should never want this feeling to end. Just concede and give into your inner ghosts again🎶”.

Danny and Vlad both glare at the ceiling, Vlad firing off a pink ecto-blast for the point of it, the bow tie giving a more mellow beat in response like it was mad at them.

Danny eyeing Vlad, “you really have a problem with my mom,  huh?”.

Vlad rubbing a hand down his face, “I used to think that if it wasn’t for my accident we would have wound up together but…”.

“Mom and dad love each other?”.

“Indeed. Though well, I am a ghost”, looking at Daniel, “you and I both know how hard letting go can be. It’s like 🎶I’m addiiiicted to the soooorrroooowww🎶”.

Danny nodding, leaning against one of the tables, “you'll get there, I think. But yeah, it’s like with all the fights I pick even, 🎶when the buzz ends by tomorrow🎶 and every fight after that, 🎶is another rush of poison flowing into my veins🎶”.

Vlad sighing, “giving both of us 🎶a dose of pleasure that resides by the pain🎶”, craning his neck, “🎶I’m addiiiicted🎶”.

Danny pushing himself up off the tables and gesturing agressively at the windows leading out to Amity Park, “🎶I’m deeepeendaaaant🎶”.

Vlad runs a hand through his hair, smiling a little, “🎶looking awwwwwwsome🎶”. While Daniel leans against the cafe/club window, “🎶feeling heeeelpleeess🎶”.  Vlad glancing back at the teen and not for the first time realising that Daniel, maybe, wasn’t really okay… and honestly? Neither was he. Vlad sighing and walking over to the boy, “🎶I knooooooow I’m raising cain by every highway in hell🎶”, he was thinking that maybe he could move and become the mayor here, “🎶maybe things won’t be so terrible inside this home town🎶”; it would be good for Daniel and maybe it was a change that Vlad himself needed.

Danny jerks while the bow tie tune picks up again in a more fancy dancing manner, “you’re thinking of moving here?”. Vlad nods, so Danny continues, “I think that would be good, honestly. 🎶’cause we’re both one of a kind🎶”, Danny making a mocking gesture at him, “and I’m sure I can 🎶give a burning fool a place to dwell🎶”.

Vlad grabbing his hand an twirling him around ridiculously, “🎶and your ideals are just laughable, but hey kid what the Hell. We’re both charming ghost beaux🎶”.

Danny laughing and going along with the twirling, “🎶’cause inside of both of us is just a lost cause🎶”.

Vlad chuckling right back, “🎶but we’ll dress us up for now with a smile🎶”.

The GhostWriter adding in, “🎶a wicked smile🎶”, with an eerie laugh.

Vlad nods to himself, officially making his decision. This town could not survive with just Daniel and was definitely going to need someone with deep pockets who could manipulate the government into giving them money for all the insane damages. “🎶I’ll show these simpletons some proper class and styyyyyyleee🎶”.

Danny snorting, “🎶and I’ll chlorinate your closets with some punny flair🎶”. That feels ominous in Vlad’s opinion.

They nod at each other, speaking in unison, “🎶here in this spooooooooky town, we’re sure our plan is sound🎶”, both of them pointing up, “🎶and our little annoyance will be fooooouuuuund🎶”, which promptly results in the GhostWriter falling through the ceiling due to the songs/GhostWriters keyboards manipulation of reality, and the two halfas outright pounce on him.

His shriek is very girly and their maniacal laughs are very… maniacal.

Danny stuffing the ghost in his thermos and ‘Vlad’s’ artefact too for good measure after yanking it off the other man’s wrist. “So you’re really going to just, try to become mayor here and move?”.

“There’s not much else for me to do with my time and someone needs to keep an eye on you”, Vlad sighing, “and maybe being more exposed to the way Maddie really is will help things”.

Danny chuckles, “good vampiric mentor”.

“I will decide you need a lesson in endurance”.

“Oh be still my fucking tits!”.

“Daniel!”.

Danny just pouts exaggeratedly at him as they try to sneak out of the restaurant/cafe/club without being noticed. That predictably doesn’t go as planned, with Valerie poking her head around, “I have a lot of questions about that opera bullshit”. Oh Ancients, she saw that shit.

Vlad puts up his hands, “now Valerie-”. But Danny cuts him off, dramatically putting a hand to his chest, “are you cheating on me”; this situation was beyond un-fucking-salavagable. Making both his mentor and his friend/fellow ghost hunter look at him like they both bit lemons. Danny rolling his eyes, “what? The only reason for Vladdie to not be super freaked out is if Valerie here already knew about him and no way he would tell anyone other than an apprentice or maybe close friend”.

Vlad shrugs very awkwardly, “I’m not one to put all my eggs in one basket”. Both Valerie and Danny glare a bit murderously, before punching him in the face. Vlad just sighs, “I suppose I deserved that”.

Both of them snapping, “you think?!?”.

Valerie looking at Danny, “who did you even think got me into this?”.

Danny shrugs, “I thought you were just following spontaneous murderous desire all on your lonesome”.

“You’re a fucking idiot”.

Vlad sighing, “yes, and a fool that should dispose of a certain someone before he causes us any more issues”. Danny rolls his eyes, “at least I got help with my project out of this… kinda”, then actually moves to meander off like he’s told, shouting behind himself, “still good for training tonight?!”.

Vlad eyes Valerie, who shrugs, so Vlad shouts back, “as always, though you’ll have a sparring partner this time and finish that project first! I don’t want you wasting this evenings absolute mess!”.  Danny holds up double thumbs up before tripping over his own feet and falling to the ground flat on his face.

Valerie facepalms, “what have I gotten myself into?”.

---

Mr. Lancer was later both very confused and impressed with the… odd direction of Daniel’s song prompt project. It was like one part theatrical musical, one part taking out some kind of issue(s) with song, and one part spite? It was creative though, which is what he asked for. Full marks and maybe a side note about seeing the school therapist.

End.

Prompts: Write a fic inspired from any song released in the last six years. and Danny has to go to Vlad for help and Lancer gives the class a project that Danny finds a very ghostly solution to. and Try as he might, Danny can’t think of a prompt for his creative writing homework. So Ghost Writer decides to step in, and do the writing for him. Shenanigans ensue. and AU where Vlad isn't blatantly evil in Bitter Reunions, and Danny initially sees no reason not to accept his mentorship and Vlad was starting to regret stealing his current artifact.

#Danny Phantom #phandom #phic phight #phic phight 2023 #danny #vlad #ghost writer #crack #singing #mentor vlad #fan fic #phan phic #my writing #have a fic suck my dick #phantomphangphucker #gothmoth

[brookheimer]

Dfunk anon (off anon now bc who givea a fuck) from earlier love uuu thank you for validating my takes <3

Yeah obviously i dont mean the if you love roman dni shit seriosuly lol. Thags gow it is with this show today we hate em tomorrow we love em again, they contain multitudes. Its the awful people show, we were doomed from the start what else did we expect et cetera

One thing that did shock me was shiv's pregnancy reveal to tom, do you have any thoughts on what the fate of tomshiv might be? Ifl at this point shes too far gone sges gonna do everyhing in ger power to "win" and if she doesnt at least shell bring everyone down with her.. ita gonna get ugly methinks. Anyway i understand if you gotta go to sleep i should too its been real gn

YOOO DRUNK ANON REVEAL !! hello and thank u for the asks they were a joy truly. no bad takes in sight!

and yeaaaah the tomshiv moment this ep really really Got me — personally found it like 10000x more affecting than the screaming match last episode. one of my fav tomshiv convos ever maybe? like just so devastating bc they just fundamentally do not understand each other the way they want to be understood. but as for ur question yeah i can’t really see them ending up in a happy marriage to say the least! i do think there will be attempts at reconciliation probably from tom’s end — once it really sinks in that she wasn’t lying about the baby, i think he’ll try to talk to her. i mean, from his perspective, shiv came up to him to try to sweettalk her way back into his life after their blowup last night not bc she actually meant her apology but bc she wanted an in at ATN on election night, and she used the one thing tom has explicitly wanted more than anything else in their relationship — a baby — against him as a manipulation tactic to try and reel him in. like, his response to her was genuine and hurt; it wasn’t an attack so much as a deeply sad “you’re…. seriously going to do this to me? this is what we’re doing?” and of course shiv is horrified and furious he doesn’t believe her (understandably so, i know i would be too), and everything goes downhill from there. i think yeah, it’ll probably get ugly, but just in general i’d be a little surprised if the ending were like insanely bleak. the show cares too much about its characters for that, which is a good thing — they won’t receive unrealistically horrible endings to hammer in The Satire, because yes succession is a satire, but it’s also a character and relationship study. they’ve never sacrificed that for satire before (except for greg but who gives a fuck its greg) so i don’t think they will now. i don’t think there will be a happy ending but i do think it’ll be open ended enough that some form of reconciliation or at least like peace (as in even if they’re not together i think there will be a sense of self-assurance, in a way, that there isn’t right now) will be visible somewhere off in the distance. whether or not the characters will actually ever reach it is anyone’s guess, but i don’t think succession will revel in their misery in a Boom Haha Satire Fuck Em way. i don’t think it’ll be a hopeful ending by any means, but i do think it’ll be an ending that holds room for some distant hope, rather than snuffing it out entirely (cough veep cough cough)

sorry that was much more of a general / thematic answer than specifically tomshiv related but tbh as of rn i have no fucking clue how the show is going to end — it just feels like there’s too much left, like there’s so much more i want to see. i’ve gotten a lot of asks along the lines of like “you’re so good at predicting things! any predictions for the ending?” (which, first of all, thank u <3) but my ‘predictions’ are really more about following the latest narrative threads than anything else. like, ask me again next week LMAO bc it’ll all depend on what happens in the coming ep. i have a broader sense thematically on the tone i think the show will try to strike but as for details im totally lost — it feels too far away! how can it end so soon there’s so much left! but ya know. we shall see >:)

#sorry for lowkey hijacking this ask to answer OTHER asks in my inbox. o would copy paste to those asks but i am lazy and on mobile so it #would b hard #is this comprehensible? dunno. brain mush. post #succession #succession spoilers #succession speculation #asks #loversneverlose #long post #casey shut the fuck up about shiv roy #. kinda

[bisluthq]

This question occurred to me very randomly, but I was trying to figure out who I think has a higher body-count John or Jake, and while I think it's almost definitely John, I also don't think there is THAT much of a gap between them. Like in terms of highly-publicied hookups, they're actually pretty evenly matched, and even on the less notable front, they both have had "entanglements" with PLENTY of people.

Idk, I think a lot about the differences between these dude’s including on the sexual front. And I think like, as you've been saying on the whole Joe V Matty V Travis thing, I think they're like different archetypes of dude.

Like Joe reminds me of Jake in the way that Matty reminds me of John. And as you've been saying, I think Joe and Jake are probably pretty evenly matched (aka are genuinely quite good) but the difference in Taylor's experience probably played a big role in her enjoyment level. However, despite their presumed skill, we don't have like 100% confirmation of it (outside of like reputation for Joe😭). Like to my knowledge, none of Jake's exes have ever said much about his *skills.

Whereas with John and Matty, though they both kind of give me the vibes of dude’s who think they're better in bed than they are (which could very well be true) they both have like confirmed exes going on the record being like, "The sex was fantastic." And the thing is I don't know, nor do I want to know (though John did give some insight. "When I’m fucking you, I’m trying to fuck every man who’s ever fucked you, but in his ass, so you’ll say “No one’s ever done that to me in bed.” It’s all about geometry. I’m sort of a scientist; it’s about being obtuse with an angle. It’s sort of this weird up-and-over thing. You gotta think “up and over.” - which to this day still confuses me) what exactly it is these men are doing, but evidently it's working.

But again, as you said, I don't think a 19 year old Taylor Swift was looking for like *wild sex (outside of the wall-fucking context) and therefore probably didn't have as good a time with John as she did with Matty.

That being said, I don't think John is like *bad in bed. If he is, several of his ex-girlfriends are lying, lmao😭 and I think the whole hero worship thing probably helped (ew). Like by the description given by Jessica Simpson, it seems like John really makes a Thing of it, which I think would be overwhelming in either a very positive way or a pretty negative one.

Anyway, I've just spent way too long Ranking about the skills of Taylor Swift's exes boyfriends. What else is new?!

But WAIT also I was also thinking about whether I thought Taylor or Travis has a higher body-count. My money is honestly on Taylor even though I feel like Travis is a more frequent enjoyer of like casual sex.

didn’t Katy Perry say sex with John is mind blowing? Which like… gross lol but yeah. There are the rumors of him doing the “safe sex” masturbation thing so his BC might not be as high as we think tbh. But yea it’s supposedly very good which like… gross. I don’t want to think about John in bed. Tbh I didn’t want to think about Matty in bed either so fuck u Tay for doing this to me, really.

The rest sounds about right.

re Travis and Taylor BC idk I rate it’s fairly evenly matched and agree if anything it skews marginally higher to Tay.

[teddybeartoji]

hi mickey!! i’ve been on an off adhd meds for about 4 years so i’ll tell you my experiences with the two i’ve been on ☺️

the first one i was ever on was adderall and the first day i took it i genuinely got the worst stomach ache of my life. had to leave school early it was sooooo bad. but that happened ONCE and then never again so it was all good. genuinely helped me focus, for the 2ish weeks i was on it i did really well in school which was abnormal to me. i was on the lowest dosage though and i felt like i became kind of immune to it very quick so they upped me to the next dose and i unfortunately cant remember how that went at all but i figure it didn’t do much for me bc i switched meds.

the med i’ve been on longer is vyvanse which i have a love hate relationship with…bc. well. it makes me genuinely sick, like it just completely gets rid of your appetite. the idea of food, smelling food, looking at it, eating it. just can’t do it. i either eat before it or when it first kicks in bc unfortunately if you don’t eat while you’re on it the effects are worse. like you have to fight through the sickness so you don’t feel sicker? it also makes me wayyyyy social, takes away so much of my anxiety and makes me feel happy. my therapist said it’s because adhd can manifest as anxiety often times so it’s counteracting that. i don’t have an active prescription but i had one last year so literally like 2 weeks ago i had to do a shit tone of homework and i took the rest of my pills over the course of the week. and i got soooooooooooo much more work done than i did all quarter so that was great.

the crash after is INSANE though. it’s not uncommon to feel like super sad when it wears off and i vividly remember crying in school at the end of the day once bc it was wearing off and i started having an existential crisis. the nap after also crazy like just totally knocked out for hours. and the focusing and happiness will be gone but the icky stomach feeling will linger until u eat.

that’s just my experience but i hope it helped a bit :)

HII RO<333333 THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS WITH MEEE!!!!!! it's so good to hear genuine experiences bc they can just differ so so so much. i had never heard about vyvanse so i wrote that one down for myself.

it sucks that the side effects can vary so much........ like damn can the medication just be Medication instead of taking away one thing and replacing that with like three smaller things??????? pls. when i got my antidepressants my friend told me all about her first two weeks (we had the same meds with the same dosage). she was like yeah you definitely have to eat before you take them or you'll get super sick, you have to take them almost at the exact time every day or you'll get sick + she had like stomach aches and she felt like she was gonna throw up a lot so she was just constantly chewing gum for the first two weeks and that scared the fuck out of me. bc. that's a lot of things lmao like is it even worth it all of that???? but then i had absolutely none of that NONE OF IT. the only time i feel sick is when i forget to take them...... but it's still good to know how it is for other so i can atleast BE READY FOR IT.

ok but you don't take them daily though right? just when you know you're gonna be more busy? is that just because you don't feel like you have to take them daily or you don't want to? my friend kind of does the same but the thing is... i am literally unemployed rn and i don't have school or anything but i still feel like i can't focus on anything so i'd probably be taking them on a daily basis anyway.. and i'm just wondering whether that's a bad thing or not. maybe it just depends on how well they actually work and whether or not they give me any big side effects............ sighh it's so upsetting that you just have to Try Them. pay for the session buy the meds probably suffer for some time just as an experiment lmao i love it

it's really good to hear that it helps with your anxiety too btw!!! i didn't know that it could do that and this is just making me wanna try it out even more i'd love to Not Be Anxious. whew what a crazy thought.

but i am very very very scared of the appetite loss though bc well...... i struggle with that anyway i just kind of forget about it and it's such a big task so the thought of taking something that could possibly make that even worse.............. is scary lmao this was one of the things my psychiatrist warned me about too

oh and also the crash after it......................... MMMMMMMM yeah that's a bit scary too just considering i tend to go through every single feeling and emotion on a daily basis anyway thanks to my good old friend autism. SIGHHHHH WHY IS IT HARD BEING OFF MEDS AND WHY IS IT HARD BEING ON MEDS PLSSSS

oke i kinda yapped but genuinely THANK YOUUU FOR TELLING ME ABOUT UR EXPERIENCE!!!!! now i know what to expect a bit more!!!! i hope you're having a good good day<333 love u MWAHH

#THANK UUUUUUU #i appreciate u sm!!!! #gonna go and look for an appointment time rnnnn #sigh i love being an experiment #ro <3 #friends!!

[x3rrorx]

She didn't just come to me out of the blue. I followed her after I got the anon messages and the next day she reached out to me saying she figured the day would come that his fans would find her. That she wanted to be left out of it.

I felt bad cause I had zero intentions to talk to her.

This was my response to her after she reached out to me.

After reading what the anonymous messages were sent to me. She said she was having anxiety over it after reading the messages and she felt she need to clear up the misinformation. I told her she didn't owe me or anyone else anything and it was no one else's but her and Noah's business. She felt she could talk to me so she did. I didn't pry and I didn't ask personal questions. I just let her talk and tell me what she was comfortable telling me.

And to be clear, I never said it was weird to talk to his ex's. It's weird that an ex would go out of their way to find fans and tell them about personal stuff and trash on him. Then come back again 3 years later to do it all over again. It's weird that his other ex is going out of her way to get in with his fans when she clearly has a vendetta against him. At least this "ex" has respect for him. OG doesn't want to be in the spot light. OG has stated over and over that Noah was a good guy and that she wishes him well and a happy life. They truly are not the same.

OG also isn't gossiping about Noah or their sex life with fans. So idk man... it's massively fucking different.

"You're weird as fuck for giving this person any of your time" and why does what I do with my time bother you.

See some of y'all are pissed cause I don't give you info. Some are pissed that I do give info. Some are pissed that I would talk with an ex. Some are pissed that I wouldn't befriend the other ex.

Like some of you are so truly fucking weird. If what I do is such a bother to you personally, you do not have to be here. If I was doing something wrong in general, that's fine. But it sure seems there's just a select few who are bothered about every single thing I do. At this point, it's you babes. Just get off my page. It's truly not a hard concept. But you won't.

I’ve stated that I didn’t care who followed her, multiple times actually. But the people following her just to get in her circle and then going out of their way to talk about me and attack me or other fans… sorry babe. That’s not the fucking same. I have friends that followed her and stayed neutral because I genuinely just didn’t give a shit. I don’t care who followed who. The only thing I care about is people talking shit about me and spinning lies, spinning the narrative. Going out of your way to attack me.

Yeah, I had a problem with those people. Those are the only people that I have ever called out or tweeted back to and said we’re a problem that we’re on Carolinas “side”.

There are people that have came to my messages and sent in anonymous messages saying they don’t necessarily agree with what I am doing but they still talk to me like a human and I respected them. I responded back to them saying that is fine and I never bashed on them because they were giving me the same human decency. They weren’t bashing on me. They weren’t picking on me. They weren’t bullying me. So I gave them the same treatment that I was given. I gave them respect back.

That’s how I’ve interacted with every single person. I gave back the exact treatment I was given, whether it was someone being a c u n t to me, I gave that back. If it was someone being respectful, but still didn’t agree with me, I gave that respect back. 

You can go and spin it however you feel, that is fine, but they are so fucking different and I don’t know how much more I can express that. If you can’t see it, that is not my place to lead you — It is not my place to open your fucking eyes. 

I have also stated over and over that Carolina isn’t a bad person for trying to clear her situation up that fans maybe were also spinning the narrative. I even told her that she’s not a bad guy for doing so, but how she handled it. How she went out of her way to befriend fans publicly over the Internet, and talk publicly about an ex even though she didn’t need to. 

She wanted to be in the spotlight. She came back three years later to talk about the situation once again, finding fan pages to talk about an ex. OG isn’t doing that. OG doesn’t want to be in the spotlight, Caroline does. OG isn’t seeking out to find other fans of Bad Omens, Carolina did. OG literally doesn’t want anything to do with this, but Carolina does. So I don’t see how you guys think it’s the same thing.

I can understand you being like “why would you be friends with an ex?” Because this ex has moved on from Noah. This ex is living her life outside of Noah and doesn’t care for him to come back into her life. But if it happens then she wants it in a friendship sense and she doesn’t want there to be this negative situation between them two. Carolina doesn’t give a fuck and that’s clear with the way she has gone about it all. She wasn’t ever a bad person for expressing her feelings of an ex or talking about the situation, but the way she went about it, the way she handled everything, the way she has attacked multiple fans, not just me! She has attacked MULTIPLE fans.

So I’m sorry, but I genuinely do not see this as the same fucking thing because OG literally wants nothing out of this. She wants nothing to do with any of this, but Carolina does.

“Noah blocked his Pinterest after you followed him” it’s clear you are within the MG group as they have made it obvious they stalk everyone who follows me or I follow on everything. Either that or you’re looking through Noah’s following… which is just as fucking weird 😂 (but yeah I’m the weird obsessive fan 🥴)

Actually no, Carolina exposed his Pinterest on her tumblr blog. Must have forgotten that one huh. Y’all always twist and spin the narrative. Others have stated that fans started following him Pinterest more, so no… not just me.. clearly you were on there too if you knew I was. How hypocritical… oh right, that’s just me huh. Never you guys. 😂 what a damn joke. The MG group truly is messed up in the head. You spin absolutely everything I say and you guys never see what problems you have caused. That’s actually hilarious yet sad.

Also love the two messages are from usernames with 666… multiple accounts babe? Don’t you know how much Carolina hates multiple blogs??? 🫣

[elysianslove]

oh boy idk if you’ve ever talked about this before (i’m new to the blog, and you’re so very talented!!! you make my dumb horny heart just 🦋🦋) BUT what are your thoughts on which of the haikyuu boys are best/worst at being edged? like who’s begging and crying after 20 minutes and who’s able to hold out for hoouurrs before getting just a touch whiny. i. need to know. for science 🤲🏼

thank you so much!!! welcome to the blog my love 🥺 but omg. thoughts. so many. 

HAIKYUU BOYS THAT CAN HANDLE EDGING 

matsukawa issei; he’s purely holding out this long out of spite. as if he has something to prove, which he very much does. he’s barely bucking up into you, trying his best to hold his pants and his hisses from how borderline painful this is, but you can see how tense he is. his abs keep spasming, his biceps flexing as he fists the sheets. he keeps his legs spread for you though, lets you suck at his cock, fondle his balls, stroke at the base and squeeze at the tip with your much smaller hand. he lasts a good an hour and 10 minutes. honestly, genuinely impressive. he won’t let you get off easy though, good luck with that. 

oikawa tōru; originally, i’d think he’d be so bad at this, but honestly, oikawa’s orgasm control is so impressive? even when he’s fucking you, he’s lowkey edging himself because he always holds off until you cum. so letting you edge him isn’t too much of a problem. he definitely cries and begs like a bitch, but he lasts, oh he lasts. approximately 35 ish minutes. definitely cums without warning and without permission, and you can’t decide whether he did it on purpose to piss you off or because he genuinely couldn’t continue. it’s okay, just overstimulate him till he’s crying all over again. tōru’s a very pretty crier, after all <3

kita shinsuke; oh my god, the best boy. he’d last days if you asked him to. he’ll be quietly, as quietly as he can, panting and whining and groaning, silent tears streaming down his face every time you pull away from his cock. every time he bucks his hips up, it’s followed by a trail of “sorry, sorry, m’sorry,” that it’s just so adorable. has you cooing at him, soothingly rubbing at his thigh and murmuring that it’s okay, that he’s doing so good. he lasts around 45 minutes, but when he cums, he promises to do better next time, to last longer. anything for you <3 

sugawara kōshi; this fucking masochist. he likes it. he likes the pain. probably was the one to suggest it to you. he sits between your spread legs, back pressed to your chest with your hand stroking his dick from behind. you stroke at him until he’s so close and pull away, watching as his cock bobs desperately, and he moans for it. he’s so vocal about it, begging and pleading, but when you go to ask him if he wants to cum yet, he tells you, “no, no, i can— more, more.” he lasts 2 whole hours. it’s like, kind of scary. he does pass out after and actually scare, but he gets up a minute later with a cheeky smile like, “again?”

miya atsumu; like oikawa, he will cry and sob so fucking much, and he’ll make such a mess, but god, does he last. atsumu thrives off of praise, and having you tell him how good he’s doing for you, such a good boy, atsumu, all for me? has him drooling for it. both him, and his cock. he’ll get a little dumb halfway, almost just letting you use him, but he does whine a lot, crying and pleading for you to let him cum, but it’s all bark and no bite. it barely has anything to it. i firmly believe he’d be one of top, lasting around an hour and 30 minutes, just because atsumu gets so lost in everything, including giving up control. 

kuroo tetsurō; another one to last mainly out of spite. he wants to prove to you it’s not much, it’s not that bad, it’s easy work. you quickly make him eat his words by the third time you pull away, and it just dawns on him that he’s the one that put himself in this position in the first place. it’s no one’s fault but his own, and because he doesn’t wanna seem like a coward, backing out so quick, he lasts at least 30 minutes, and gets through it without begging, only spitting out curses and panting and groaning deeply. 

akaashi keiji; sweet boy keiji definitely lasts, all for you. he’s not too vocal either, just light curses to himself, muffled moans, broken, bitten down sobs. he genuinely does love to let you have your fun with him, because submitting to you is just so satisfying. and i can see akaashi loving edging so much because of how good the orgasm that eventually comes is. like the moment you give him permission to, he’s seeing stars, and it’s why he lasts as long as he does, why he tries to push for longer. he lasts a good 45 minutes, and he’s been trying to beat that record for a while now. don’t worry, he will. 

sakusa kiyoomi; is so fucked out, so far gone, to the point that you don’t even think he’s in control of his own body anymore. even if you told him to cum, he wouldn’t. he’s so deep in this headspace of being under your control it’s incredible. it’s mesmerizing. he looks so pretty, cock so red and wet and hard as ever, painfully so, against his pale skin, twitching and bobbing and begging for attention. he lasts 40 minutes. it’s the most gorgeous 40 minutes of both your lives. 

asahi azumane; so good! such a good boy!!! doesn’t last so long, but definitely tries his best for you. it’s some 20 or so minutes in that he cums, but he immediately starts chanting out apologies, begging for you to forgive him, to give him another chance. he continues to try until he can last so long, but it’s the fact that he’s willing to that has your heart soaring and your body heating up. 

HAIKYUU BOYS THAT CANNOT, WHATSOEVER, HANDLE EDGING

bokuto kōtarō; baby boy is crying 10 minutes in. he can’t handle it. if you tie him up, he’ll rip through them, flip you over, and fuck into you till he’s filling you up. he won’t even try. he watched a porn video where a person lasted an hour and thought, oh must be worth it, and asked you to try it on him. just. it’s just not for him. he prefers the pain of overstimulation over edging, forever. 

iwaizumi hajime; please he lasts like 2 minutes. he just hates it so much. on him, at least. he can edge you for hours, and he’d the most satisfied man on earth. but sit between his legs and tease him by sucking at his cock, only to pull away just as he’s about to cum? somebody clearly has a death wish <3 but do bring it up and ask to try it! he still won’t last lol. but make him last. watch him cry. make iwaizumi hajime cry. make him. it’s beautiful. 

kageyama tobio; mannnn kageyama can cum untouched, hands free, if you really tried. grind down against him for a minute and he’s cumming in his pants for you. he has no concept of orgasm control whatsoever, and if you tried it on him he’d just get angry at you??? like fine no sex for u tf. he lasts a good 5 minutes, so good for him or whatever. 

kozume kenma; he wants to last. he wants to. but you have him crying, sobbing, 20 minutes in, and he just unintentionally spills down your throat without warning. of course, you’d felt the twitch of his cock, but you’d wanted to see where his head was at exactly. after he came, he felt so humiliated, but he still forced eye contact with you and went, “do it again. i’ll last an hour this time.” like ok no problem for me :) 

ushijima wakatoshi; doesn’t realize he’s being edged, and when you pull away just as he’s about to cum he sits up and stares at you with a deadpan face like, “that was not very nice of you.” he just. finds it boring honestly. he doesn’t want to drag something out like that for so long. he indulges you, sure, but for like 3 minutes, before he’s like alright time to fuck you. 

hinata shōyō; hinata’s just way too overexcited. he really does put his mind to it, but i think he gets too in his head about it that he just ends up cumming right away. but it’s a ruined orgasm, cause you pull away just as he’s cumming, so it’s so not satisfying, but for some reason, hinata loved it? so yeah, lasts 0 seconds, but discovers new kink! 

HAIKYUU BOYS THAT CAN, BUT JUST DON’T WANT TO

suna rintarō; oh he most definitely can. you cannot convince me he wouldn’t be able to. as much as suna is lazy, he’s just as impatient, and he can barely handle how foreplay seems to drag on forever. he wants to be inside you, and he wants to be inside you now. it’s ridiculous. if he could though, he’d last a good hour probably. he just really doesn’t want to. 

daichi sawamura; could 100% do it if he really put his mind to it, but just. why? what’s the point of not orgasming? he just doesn’t get it </3 you can try to convince him by making him do it on you, but chances are he’s gonna realize how much he loves to do it to you only. daichi’s so possessive it’s crazy, and he gets this mischievous glint in his eye whenever he realizes how good something makes you feel, especially if it’s pain. he is a dangerous man. 

miya osamu; most definitely would be able to last hours, but again, he just doesn’t want to. it’s also not one of those situations where he prefers overstimulation either. like osamu’s plenty kinky, sure, but those two aren’t what cross his mind when you say, “let’s change things up a bit.” it’s not that he gets bored of it either. he just. doesn’t wanna do it. like he can spend time making you feel good, and vice versa, with way more different things. and he seems like a very in the moment guy, like choking you in the moment or making you squirt. yk :) 

satori tendō; oh tendō loves edging, just on you. he never really gives you a chance to ever try to with him, honestly. he just loves, loves, loves to edge you, but not because he wants to purposefully hurt you, but rather to praise you, to tell you how good you are for him, to make you feel so good when he finally lets you cum. if you were to edge him, he’d honestly probably last over two hours. like not even exaggerating, he probably would. but no, you’re more fun! 

#haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader #matsukawa smut #oikawa smut #kita smut #miya atsumu smut #sugawara smut #kuroo smut #akaashi smut #sakusa smut #asahi smut #bokuto smut #iwaizumi smut #kageyama smut #kenma smut #ushijima smut #hinata smut #suna smut #miya osamu smut #daichi smut #tendo smut #sal's thirst tag <3

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 23: PRETTY BOY

emotions run wild when everyone is drunk and hardly coherent. quackity is always loud, but tonight is a full on assault on the senses (the ears, in particular). bretman simps for corpse too much for your liking. rae is happy for once. there’s a confession of love somewhere in there. sister james makes a very good impostor, but that’s old news, the real question is who gave you a knife? a new persona emerges that leaves the roaches quivering in their boots.

─── corpse husband x reader, a lil bit of everyone x reader (because she’s a queen) ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: a lil over 7k.

author’s note: it’s the way i can’t follow a fucking calendar for me. sorry guys, i swear to god i thought i had one more day before thursday . the idiot award goes to me and i accept it with pride. anyway, i was excited to write this for a while! quackity is in mexico, that’s why he drinks, too. my fic, my rules, he’s too funny not to include. im also working on an extra w dream and mr quack so look forward to that, too! hopefully u like this part ily xx and as always lmk wat u think!!

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The outfit for today was picked with care and consideration. Hot, as always- you had forgotten your roots, your hoodie and sweats lay hidden in the bottom of your drawer never to be worn on stream again. You’ve changed. Clout really does that to people. Some viewers, naturally, find your hotness near insulting: how dare you rub your beauty in their faces, and so unabashedly, too?! If only you had a twinge of self-awareness, perhaps you would tone it down. But you don’t, and whether that’s by choice or not is the mystery the whole internet tries to solve (ARMY has been working diligently, and you admire their effort, though in the end their tireless labor brings no tangible results). 

You went from hot to hotter. In all truth, the fires eating away at California can be blamed on you. You carry this burden in stride, in your platform overpriced shoes some girl scammed you on Depop with, in your fishnets, in your skirt, in your corset, in your rings and necklaces and chains. You woke up today and chose violence. Decided your existence will be a plague to the rest of the populace, and meant it (that, maybe, you took inspiration from a certain faceless Youtuber that so happens to be your boyfriend or whatever). You feel powerful. Like you could step on the world and the world would let you. You decide that it’s the way it should always be. 

The smile on your lips informs of nothing good to your quaint, small audience of 40k. You change the lighting in your room from the soft cherry blossom pink to menacing violet. As fitting for a villain.

Perhaps California’s hellish sun has finally purged you of your bubbly, docile nature (arguably, you had never possessed it to begin with); perhaps it’s the forth mimosa you’re mixing as people slowly trickle into the lobby. Who knows?! Not you, definitely. What do all of those boring dead white European philosophers say? Embrace the unknown? Cheers, you’ll drink to that.

In stark contrast to your appearance, your room is a fucking mess. A war-zone of epic anime scale. Everything is scattered, well, everywhere. A perfect representation on what’s going on in your mind, always. You don’t like how people focus on your surroundings-- you’re the main attraction, hello? Are you not enough to sustain them? Must they beg for more?! Totally ungrateful. You shake your head in disappointment, as if a mother scolding her children. 

noooooo! mom pls forgive me i will never ask abt anything ever again T_T

yall looking at the room? lol couldnt be me

feels like im five and my mum just told me i cant eat a pretty rock i found on the pavement:(

You can’t contain your sly grin. Eyes twinkle with a purplish hue, appearing all the more menacing. You tricked them once again, oh how absolutely evil of you. In your blind delight you accidentally spill champagne on your lap.

“-Oop, fuck.” You snort.

why does she sound like goofy 

The scandalous drunk Among Us stream is about to start. You had been eerily silent through the greetings, and those that chose to approach you were met with a cold shoulder and minimal replies. All on purpose, of course. You wish to plant a seed of unease within them, and so far, it’s working. There are questions unanswered, jokes unsaid, Quackity unteased. It breaks your heart, but it must be done. You look into the camera, all vulnerable and devout, as if to say: I’m doing this for you, all for you.

pack it up yandere simulator

idk whats going on but i think im into it?

villain arc villain arc villain aRC VILLAIN ARC

“Hey, guys,” Corpse’s voices rings in your headphones, and not a blink later his astronaut appears in the lobby in a cloud of smoke, “Hi, Y/n.”

More sharp, excited hellos follow after. You merely hum, though give no further reply. As Corpse strays to your side, Charlie steps in in front of him, “BDA access only. You have a permit, bitch?”

“Y/n is being quiet-she’s being quiet, guys!” Quackity helpfully informs, as if the rest failed to notice your cryptic silence, “Don’t be sad Corpse, man, Corpse don’t be-she didn’t say shit to me either.”

“Y/n has decided to not waste her breath on the SDS.” Charlie voices, “And you know what? I actually agree with her for once.”

“SD-what now?” Dream questions.

“The Small Dick Society.” Charlie explains, noting Dream’s whine of protest, “Oh no, don’t give me that shit, weren’t you bitching about not being invited and not belonging to exclusive clubs? Congratulations, you’re finally part of one.”

“Wait!” Quackity interjects, “Am I part of it too?”

“Guess, Sherlock.”

“I’ll drink to that.” Corpse says. You nod to your audience, like he just spoke the God honest truth, and follow in his example. Your tentative sip unexpectedly turns into a greedy gulp, but you’re not complaining. The only slightly coherent thought that rings in your mind is drink tasty.

“Ignore them,” Rae chimes, “Y/n’s probably plotting something and using Charlie as a cover up.”

“I’d never.” The words slip past your lips before you can stop them.

“Well you sure are very quick to deny it.” You can hear her smirking, can hear the proud lilt in her voice, like she caught onto your silly little scheme, like she has you all figured out. Your eyes narrow dangerously. The night behind your window pools dark, with far away city lights glimmering before they, too, seem to dim. 

Your roommate is back on your shitlist. How her name was missed among the rest.

“I’m defending my honor.” You yelp, the playfulness back in your voice along with your sunny smile, “I can’t have my wifey slandering me online. At least do it in private, geez.”

If Rae’s such a good detective, you’ll give her a good chase. Perhaps you’ve been laying it on too thick. Made her too suspicious. She can’t out you yet--not when your plans are so grand, so fun. It would be a waste.

“Why weren’t you saying anything then?” Quackity questions.

“Do I need a reason not wanting to talk to you?” You shoot back. Your friends laugh and he tries to shriek something past their cackle. You lean back into your chair, the tension from Rae’s confrontation finally easing. You wink at the camera and bring a finger to your lips. The roaches swear to secrecy, elated by your wickedness. As appropriate, they spam devil emojis and various renditions of evil hohohos and hehehes. The apple truly does not fall far from the tree. You had raised them well. You raise your glass in solidarity. A few donations fall into your pocket, easily summed up as: make them suffer.

Muting the discord call, you give a single response, “Oh, I intend to.”

i hope this doesn’t awaken something in me

^already too late for me bro

As caught up in wreaking havoc among your viewers as you are, you miss Sykkuno’s entrance, though from what you can tell, Charlie gave a stern warning to back the fuck off to him, too. He’s playing into your plan so beautifully. Truly, you couldn’t do this without him. Back to stalking the chat you go.

Your eyes flicker to the game upon Bretman’s signature drawl and “Hi, daddy.”. You have no time to get offended at Corpse’s sweet “Hi, honey” back, because the next person to join the discord call and the lobby leaves you speechless. You knew, of course, you had been informed of the line-up, but still, you had never expected yourself to be so close to Jomes Chorles himself. You make a weird gesture with your hands, half wave half excited wiggle, as if you’re telling the audience to calm down, when, in fact, it is you that needs calming.

He goes saying his hello’s like doing a public service, name by name, before, lastly, uttering, “Hi, Miss Y/n. Loooove the vids.”

He’s a roach in disguise, who could’ve known?! Your audience is so diverse and unexpected, gosh, you’d shed a tear if the mascara wasn’t so expensive.

“Hi!” You reply with a grin, and it’s genuine this time, a glimmer of your old self, “Hi, I love your videos, too. It’s like, really cool to finally meet you.”

“Oh my God, you too!” Is his enthusiastic reply, “Okay, the energy in the studio today? Love it.”

“Is this all of us?” Quackity asks.

“Sadly.” James says with a note of disappointment.

“HEY!”

“Okay, guys!” Ash chimes, “Let’s do this! Proximity Among Us, round one, go go go!”

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Luck does not shine upon you during the first round- you are stuck as Crew Mate, your life cut short by Bretman who had the audacity to bite your head off. You’re positive Ke$ha wrote her hit single Cannibal about him, and if she didn’t, she definitely had a That’s So Raven moment and predicted it. It’s also insanely suspicious as after you are eliminated he sticks real close to Corpse, feigning innocence (and this is a controversial opinion you do not endorse) better than even you. It wounds your pride, having been picked off so casually, so quickly, and now stuck a ghost you roam the halls of the dying spaceship, lost, confused, heartbroken.

Charlie runs past you, not once even glancing in your direction. “Brother...” You mutter sadly, “Do you not see me here? Do you not feel... the loss of your twin’s heartbeat...?" Damn, these mimosas really are making you emotional. You sniffle and take a sip to calm the storm within you. No rage, just sadness. You are still processing your own tragic demise.

Suddenly, a meeting is called. There’s a horrible red X on your astronaut. You are the only one dead so far, and of course the rest won’t vote out the fucker. How bitterly you sit! With your arms crossed over your chest and your glare sharp enough to cut through glass. Fuck the sad shit, now you’re just angry. At the very least, the second Impostor could’ve given you some company!

“I knew something felt off.” Charlie is first to speak.

“Who the fuck killed Y/n?” Corpse questions, and his voice ignites a whole discussion that lasts much too short. The others skip, having no suspect yet. It’s much too soon to start pointing fingers, but you still feel like they should have at least tried. Pouting, you fix yourself another drink.

“Stop drinking!?” You gasp, exasperated at your chats demands, “I’m dead! What else should I do, the tasks?! Nah, fuck that. I’m done. I’m out. Charlie better employ his fucking detective skills because if the Impostors win, I will literally quit the game--yes I will, no I’m not bullshitting, fucking watch me.”

Thankfully, Bretman was caught venting, and you didn’t have to end the stream prematurely. The second Impostor, your roommate (oh, the betrayal, Rae, how could you?!) was voted out due to Corpse’s suspicion. Victory to the Crew Mates! The game restarts and you find yourself back in the lobby.

“Miss Y/n,” Bretman says, “I am sooo sorry for killing you first, baby. It was just too easy. I couldn’t pass it up.”

Giggling, Quackity chimes, “Sister slaughtered.”

“Oh my God,” James groans, “shut up!”

“Yeah, Y/n.” Charlie speaks, and there’s an accusatory note in his calm voice, “Why the fuck did you allow yourself to be eliminated first? Real noob shit, I expected more of you.”

“HUH?!” You frown, “What’s with the victim blaming?! I literally was doing my task and Bretman snuck up on me. It’s not like I had a weapon to defend myself!”

“You have been avenged,” Corpse states, “and that’s all that matters.”

“Thank you, Corpse!” You say, “At least someone cares.”

“Hey, I helped, too!” Dream pipes up.

“No, you didn’t.” Corpse shoots him down, “I was the only one.”

“You were not--”

“Literally was. Isn’t that right, Sykkuno?”

“Uhhhh-” Sykkuno trails off, “Well, we-we all helped!” You can hear his shy smile, and you just know he’s bobbing his head up and down at this exact moment, “We all helped. Team work!”

“Team work!” The rest echo, save for yourself, Corpse, Charlie, and the two Impostors. Silence speaks more than a thousand words or whatever. You pray to any higher power willing to listen to finally assign you the role of the villain, the one you were born to do. 

Sadly, higher powers must have either shitty customer service or are in need of hearing aids, and you almost scream in frustration when your astronaut appears along with the others, the bold CREW MATE title chipping away at your master plan.

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

“Hey, Y/n, hey! Hey, Y/n!” Rae finds you in Cafeteria, where you, metaphorically, are eating your feelings. Not that she needs to know, of course. She sounds chipper, a bit ditsy, and that must mean she’s sufficiently tipsy. You store that information for later, and forget about it as soon as you notice Dream and Sykkuno, like her very own personal bodyguards, trailing after her, “Wanna play a game?!”

“Is this Saw?” You inquire, somewhat lazy. You’d be lying if you said the alcohol wasn’t affecting you, it’s just instead of making you bubbly, it makes you mellow. This was supposed to be fun, you were supposed to terrorize everyone and laugh as they perished by your hand, yet here you are, wallowing in self-pity. The roaches start worrying. The donation jingle chimes.

BEATINGS & SLUTATIONS yns_fishnets donated 5$ mom just wait it out & dont worry youll get your vengeance soon lead them on!!!!

Your fishnets have a point! 

“Saw?--No, no, haa, no it’s a drinking game.” Dream sounds like he has had one too many rounds of this mysterious game, and naturally, you are intrigued.

“Where we drink!” Sykkuno clarifies. Right, well that explains everything! If you had any questions, you surely have none now.

“Okay, so, name a category, and you have to, like, say a word associated with it...Or something along those lines.” You hadn’t even agreed and Rae is explaining the rules already. She knows you too well. It’s both a blessing and a curse, “Can be anything! Okay, Y/n, Y/n, Y/n start!”

“Uhh--” If only your brain computed as fast as she spoke! “Song lyrics! Wait--who drinks?”

“You fail, you drink!” She hurries, “Choke me like you hate me but you love meeeeee. Syk, go, go go!”

“Uhm, ah, I don’t wanna feel like this, uh, fuck?” He laughs--it’s a raspy, embarrassed little sound, “I don’t...wanna look like this? Dream, now you!”

“Wait, we’re singing Corpse’s songs?”

“Any song!” You urge him quickly, “Hurry! Or drink!”

“She say I kill her cat like I'm Luka Magnotta--”

“Hey! That’s cheating! You can’t use my song!” Rae protest.

“That wasn’t in the rules!” He counters.

“Y/n! Time’s running out!” Sykkuno exclaims.

“Oh, uh, will-will the real Slim Shady please stand up!”

NOT EMINEM WHAT THE FUCK

MOOOM WHT THE HELL THIS ISNT 2008 T_T

“Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Russia’s greatest love machine--”

“All...All the other kids with the pumped up kicks better, uhh, run better run, faster...-faster than my gun?”

“Uhh, shit--fucking hell.” Dream laughs, and Rae practically screams at him to keep going, “Alright! Okay! I’m singing--uh, you’re so golden, na na na na?”

“I tell you what a woman loves most,” You chime gleefully, “it’s a man who can slap but can also stroke.”

finally, the mother mother representation we’ve all been waiting for

i aint exactly gay but i aint exactly not gay >:)

the bis won

“I steal a few breeeeaaaths from the woooorld for a minute--”

“Mitski?!” You question, eyes bulging, “Baby, who hurt you?”

Even if you can’t see her, you know she’s waving her arms around and shaking her head, “Not the point! Sykkuno!”

“Uh, I-I, uhm, I don’t--”

“Drinnnnk!” You all chorus. 

“It was a good concert,” You say, “Syk, I’ll drink with you.”

“Thank you, Y/n. That’s very kind of you.” He says softly, with a smile lining his lips. You grin.

“Oh, fine. Everyone, bottoms up!” Rae decides, and no one protest. A moment of silence passes, then, “Well, GG, GG, let’s do some tasks?”

Your enthusiastic Ariana Grande-esque “yuh” is cut short by the second meeting of game two being called. The first one to go had been Ash, voted out during a bathroom break as a joke, and you still feel a bit bad about that. Now, you notice Charlie has been eliminated. A sense of righteousness fills you--while you mourn for your brother from another mother and father and family tree, you feel like this is divine punishment for slandering you before the start of this round. Karma. Nothing much is discussed, and the meeting ends shortly with everyone skipping. 

You spend a good ten minutes wandering around with Dream, who’s mission appears to be convincing you to join his Minecraft server, and really, there was no need for him to try so hard. You failed to provide him with a concrete answer only because it would've been to humiliating to admit that you agreed instantly upon hearing the word Minecraft.

That’s when things get fucking weird. Another meeting is called whilst you’re in the middle of fixing lights, and once the board with the members appears you audibly gasp. There had been 8 living, breathing astronauts rushing around the map, and now only 4 remain. You, Corpse, James, and Alex. 

“What the fuck--what the fuck?!” You screech alarmed, noting Dream being among the perished crew, “I was just with Dream fixing the lights, I was just with him, what the fuck--”

“Okay, no one panic.” James says, “Let’s figure this out. Okay? Okay. Who else is close to Electrical?”

“I’m at Nav.” Quackity says.

“I’m at Cafeteria, but Y/n--” Corpse starts, “kinda weird that Dream died when you were with him?”

“I didn’t fucking kill him, I swear to God, Corpse, why are you accusing me?”

“Don’t be so defensive.” He says smoothly, “I’m just pointing out the obvious. We all have a reason to be sus, no? Considering you were right with him.”

“...It is suspicious.” James agrees, and a part of you dies inside. You understand their hesitance to trust you, but it doesn’t make it any less frustrating!

“Guys, I didn’t kill him, I swear. He invited me to play Minecraft, I wouldn’t do that to him, not after that!”

Corpse merely hums, and it brings no comfort what’s so ever. The situation is spiraling, and not in your favor. Trying to salvage your chances at freedom, you try again, “Wh-James, James, you called the meeting, right?”

“Yeah, I found Rae’s body near Medical.”

“So I couldn’t have killed her and Dream at the same time!” You latch onto that piece of information, hoping it will save you.

“You could’ve vented.” Corpse points out, “Plus, there’s no telling how old the body is.”

“Killing five fucking people? It’s the work of one person, or else the game would have already ended. As it stands, I am no way sober enough to think all of this out.”

A brief silence hangs in the air; your lungs constrict from tension, from spilling words so hotly. You grasp your glass, as if for emphasis, and take a shy sip. It taste sweet, a bit too sweet for your liking. Must be your nerves. You drink again to wash the taste out of your mouth, which, surprisingly, doesn’t work. You whine a little, stomping your feet like a child about to throw a temper tantrum.

“...I believe her.” Quackity says. You breathe out a sigh of relief.

“Alex, thank youuuuuu!” You gush, batting your lashes as if he could somehow see you and that would somehow portray your innocence, “I knew I liked you for a reason!”

He mutes his mic, his spill of words lost to your ears, but chat helpfully informs that he’s screaming because you don’t hate him. 

y/n out here collecting men like pokemon cards

Now all that’s left is to convince the others. You start with the one you know will work, “Corpse,” You address him in your sweetest voice.

“Y/n,” James warns, “don’t you dare--”

“Baby, I didn’t kill anyone, I’m crew mate, you gotta believe me.”

“She's innocent.” Corpse declare, thoroughly convinced.

“Oh my fucking God, you fucking simp!” James laughs, “She’s obviously manipulating you!”

“No, no, she isn’t. She’s innocent, I agree with Quackity. Now, it’s either you or him.”

“Could be you for all we know!” Alex accuses.

“Guys, time’s running out.” You mutter fretfully, noting the seconds tick by from white to red. 

“I’m voting Alex.” Corpse says.

“What?! Fucking traitor! Fine, I’m voting for you.” Alex hisses.

“Ugh, hate agreeing with Quackity, but I’m also voting Corpse. Sorry, hon, nothing personal.” James says. The VOTED icons pop up beside their characters and you panic, pressing your mouse idly but it’s too late, there wasn’t enough time, and you cry as Corpse is thrown into lava. The chat spams F, and it feels like salt on a fresh wound.

In a second you’re back in Cafeteria, shell-shocked and trembling, and Quackity cusses because the Impostor is still among you. His frustration doesn’t last long as you watch in horror as Jams Chortles, beauty guru supreme, murders the only other crew mate in cold blood and all you can do is gape and let his cheerful laughter fill your ears. The screen bleeds red, informing of Impostor victory, the second one being Ash. Looks like you voted her off for the right reason, but little difference did it make.

“Corpse!” You yell past the cacophony of voices, all in varying forms of excitement or anger, beelining for his in-game figure, “Corpse, I’m so sorry, I panicked, I tried pressing the button but I wasn’t quick enough--”

“It’s alright, baby. Don’t worry about it.” He’s so calming, so gentle, you might burst into tears again. What did you do to deserve him? You wish he was with you so you could smother him in a hug. Alas, all you can do now is say “I kith you, mwah!” and rush to the other side of the lobby, as if to hide from such a bold display of affection, even if it was a joke (it wasn’t).

yall say corpse simps for y/n but the reality is y/n simps for corpse harder

queen stop its embarrassing

bhaddies can simp!! i wouldnt but its her choice <3

More deliberations, commentary, and short breaks. Once everyone has returned, the countdown starts. You’re still reeling from the chaos of emotions, the five stages of grief you experienced in 1 second upon Corpse’s unjust demise, that it takes you a moment, a single heartbeat to realize what you’re seeing on screen.

The letters IMPOSTOR hang above your astronaut, with Dream standing just behind you as your newly appointed partner in crime. And suddenly, all the sadness and the tenderness and sympathy vanish with a curt exhale. You slowly turn your head to the chat, muting the Discord call, your soft chuckle of disbelief turning into a full blown laugh.

it’s happening!!!! 

omg omg omg omg

VILLAIN ARC VILLAIN ARC VILLAIN ARC

You slap your palm over your lips, trying to contain your wicked smile, to tone down your broken giggles, “N-No, I can’t laugh yet,” shaking your head softly, you look into the camera, “they’re all going to die.”

pack it up light yagami

this has awoken something in me.

^ same

The crew mates go their own ways, rushing to do their tasks like the diligent little workers they are. How adorable. Their grim fate is still miles away from them. The shit you’ll pull will be for the history books. Much like your outfit, which you picked keeping in mind your newfound thirst for blood, you had devised your plan of action with care and consideration. You had been mulling it over all day, drawing on paper like the absolute madwoman you are; hell, you even made sticky notes on who to go for first and what to say. Sure, being moderately drunk hinders your memory slightly (an understatement of the century), but you got a feel for what you’re going to do. It’s nothing short of evil.

Dream and you don’t exchange words, you merely nod at him-- which he, of course, can’t see-- but your criminal bond enables telepathic communication. You can hear his thoughts, ones that strangely sound like drink drink, drink drink. And really, who are you to refuse such an enticing offer?! As he fucks off to stalk his victims, or play pretend, you take a sip. The cocktail is still sweet, but this time it’s not the icky sweet you had tasted prior. You glance at your sticky notes, ones the roaches can’t see, and nearly spill your drink for the second time today as you jerk.

“Fuck!” You exclaim, shoving your headphones off and spinning in your chair. You hastily stand up, wobble -- the world is pleasantly funny right about now -- and giggle. Stepping past the mountains of abandoned clothes and pillows and blankets and anime plushies, you maneuver your way to your bedside table and yank it open, nearly taking out the whole drawer with you. In the mess of old diaries and bad drawings, pencils, jewelry, and stickers, you fish out something you should not be wielding in your inebriated state.

It’s a knife.

In midst of teenage angst you had ordered it off of Amazon with your mom’s credit card, all the while whining that it’s not a phase, mom, and it’s what all of my cool kid friends with fried hair have, and don’t you want me to fit in, don’t you want your daughter to be happy?! You think it’s about that time, the time of too much uneven eyeliner and black eye shadow, that she took to calling you little raccoon. Trash rabbit was your personal favorite, but she used it sparingly. When you presented your Macy’s outfit, holding up a fucking butterfly knife, to your dad, asking if it was a look, he glanced up from some boring business magazine all boring business dads read and said, with a bright smile might you add, “It’s a something!”.

Oh, how it gleams in the lilac light. You used to do tricks with it, back in eight grade maybe, and--what the fuck? Why did you parents allow you to buy it in the first place? Well, because you’re the only child, the only one important, of course they got it for you and clapped enthusiastically at your performances, because why wouldn’t they? The whining they’d face otherwise would’ve been harder to endure than a whole dance number to Panic! At The Disco’s greatest hits. Broadway looked so fucking shabby in comparison. Your mom said so, so it must be true.

Stumbling back to your extremely confused viewers, you take your seat, feeling a bit more grounded now that you’re not standing on your platform shoes anymore. Putting on your headphones, you grin at the chat that starts swimming, and not from too much drinking either. You do a quick flick of your wrist, one that thankfully doesn’t end in injury, and the sharp tip of the exposed knife points upwards, glimmering. It’s a rainbow colored one, because one, it’s pretty, and two, you weren’t hardcore enough for the jet-black or straight up military ones the other emo kids had. Cute and dangerous, just like you.

So you just sit there, holding it up, looking somewhat sly as the roaches capture this momentous moment with screen-caps. Someone definitely clipped you trudging past the obstacle course to obtain a weapon of mass destruction. You must be already trending on Twitter, though you can’t exactly log on and confirm your suspicions. You just feel like you might be, like you should be, because your audience wouldn’t let this slide. Thankfully, your friends don’t have time to check social media, or you’d be outed in an instant.

“Y/n?” Your roommates voice booms from your headphones, and you perk up with a stupid realization that you completely forgot about Among Us. Stuck at the start, at the lobby where Dream had left you, you see her astronaut waddling to you, “What are you doing here? Wait--Have you not moved from the beginning?” She can barely finish the sentence without giggling. 

You grin, “I was looking for something.”

Your voice is soft, too calm for your usual frantic spill. You gently set the knife down, hand coming to rest on your mouse, fingers idly, slowly, bouncing on the buttons.

“...What were you looking for?” She’s none the wiser, the numerous drinks consumed tonight numbing her sharp mind. She would have noticed. Your eerie composure would’ve given it away in a heartbeat, or at least hinted at something being objectively wrong. But she sounds curious. Poor girl, hasn’t she heard? Curiosity killed the cat.

“A knife.”

“A knife?!” There’s something about her tone that implies a mental clicking, the puzzle pieces falling together, “You have a knife?!”

“Yes.”

“No!”

You think it would only be appropriate that the random sequence of killing animations renders the backstabbing one. You grin, biting your lower lip with a quiet snicker.

i love women

if evil bad...why seggy?

You take your time leaving her there -- in true serial-killer-to-be fashion, you stick around for a bit longer, admiring your handiwork, or more like the chat singing your praises. You joined today with the intent of making an interesting stream. You have no doubt in your mind that now it will be legendary.

You move down the hallway, and you let your imagination wander: you can almost feel the stuffy air of your helmet, can almost hear your loud footsteps echoing in all this hush, can almost see your reflection in the spotless tile floor. It’s not long before your second victim makes an appearance, running circles in Cafeteria. You hear his voice first before you see him, recognizing Alex by his unhinged screech of “Let’s go, let’s go, let’s goooo!” 

“And what’s got you so excited?” How cool and collected you are, gosh, you barely contain the quiver of excitement that threatens to slip out. 

“Y/n!” He exclaims, rushing to your side like a lost puppy--he’s really making this easy for you, he’s not even trying, “You just missed--Oh my fucking God, you just missed James, he-he called me tall, he called me fucking tall! Let’s go, let’s gooooo!”

“Well, you are tall, aren’t you?” You chime sweetly, almost as sweet as the drink that lingers on the tip of your tongue, “Real 6′3 energy, no?”

“Yes, yes, exactly! You get it, you fucking get it--” Once again, his mic goes mute, and you glance at the chat for help.

hard to transcribe what hes saying but hes taking shots and yelling that he loves you good job mom

hey, queen! girl, you have done it again, constantly raising the bar for us all and doing it flawlessly

mom plz dont kill alex hes too cute hes all uwu rn

Oh, how you’re about to break his poor little heart. If you had any good left in you, you’d spare him. You don’t, and you’re not taking requests at the moment, so all you do is smile at your chat and they know. They just do. Hive-mind shit, you’re all two-faced little fuckers.

You giggle, and it sounds a tad fake, “You’re so weird, Alex,” You start, and he’s back in the call, a sound of confusion echoing in your ears, “but I get it, you know. You’re weird. You’re a weirdo. You don’t fit it, and you don’t want to fit in. I mean, really, has anyone even seen you without your stupid hat?”

“...Do--” He sputters, bellowing a laugh, “Do you have that whole fucking monologue memorized?!”

“Is it because you’re bald?”

“I’m not fucking bald!” His giddiness is quickly replaced by anger.

You hum, pretend to think, lastly barking a “Liar.” before you kill him. His scream is cut off, leaving only deafening silence at it’s wake. Unlike with Rae, you don’t stick around. You didn’t appreciate how little he enjoyed your recital.

You run into James near Navigation, most likely on his way to Cafeteria. He ends his song mid-note, and you breathe a sigh of relief, “Finally! Someone! I’ve been looking all over, where the hell is everyone?” You question, blocking his way, lest he accidentally stumbles onto the crime scene and easily pins it on you. You’re not done yet.

“Honestly? No clue. I’m searching for them myself, like, everyone’s scattered. I hope no one died.”

You smile. You tried not to, but you can’t contain it, “Me, too.” You echo the sentiment, urging him to join you, and he does. Too trusting. Everyone in this game is too fucking trusting. You lead him back to Nav, feigning that you have a task here. As you pretend to move the spaceship, you can’t help but ask, “Hey, James?”

“Yeah?”

“What’s your favorite scary movie?”

A beat of silence passes, “Oh no, fuck that, I don’t like this at all.” He states, about to spin on his heel and bolt like he should do, but you’re quicker-- killer instincts and all-- and he’s dead before he makes it out the doorway.

“See, after your No More Lies video, I figured you’d only tell the truth.” Yes, this is the part of the anime where the villain monologues, only the hero in this case is an astronaut cut in half, and not exactly alive to listen to you. You hope James’ ghost sticks around, “Case in point, why the fuck did you tell Quackity he’s tall?” You eye the chat, which’s mostly spamming W and comparing you to Ryo from Devilman Crybaby. “Such a shame...” You murmur, pressing the REPORT button.

“What?! How are so many people dead?!” Ash gasps, her kind voice tinted with fear and confusion. Your three kills, like military stars on an uniform of a distinguished officer, are displayed on the board. Dream appears to be slacking, having yet to take a life.

“Someone’s been real fucking busy.” Charlie observes. It’s true, you have been.

“I found James in Nav, but holy shit--” You begin, exasperated, “--what the fuck, guys, how did we miss this shit? Where is everyone?”

“I’m at Electrical.” Corpse voices.

“And I’m with Corpse.” One sentence is all it takes to figure out your next target: Bretman. Revenge for being killed first in the first goddamn round, and for spending so much time with your boyfriend.

Eep!!! Boyfriend boyfriend boyfriend!!! The word even makes you forget your thirst for blood, that’s how whipped you are. Sadly, it’s time to return to reality, to this grave situation.

“And what have the two of you been conspiring?” You keep your tone level, but that alone is enough to set everyone off. The unease you had planted within them before the game started is starting to bloom. However, if they suspect you, they don’t speak up, not yet.

“Fishnets, mostly.” Corpse says.

only partly a lie he was mostly talking abt u queen <3

corpse simping for y/n is the sweetest thing ever

the times corpse used y/ns name when talking abt y/n: 1. the times he used baby or my baby: infinite

“I’m wearing them right nyoooow.” Bretman drawls.

You hum, “What a coincidence. I am, too.”

“Wait--For real?” That seems to catch Corpse’s attention, because of course it does, you picked them with him in mind, after all.

“No peeping.” You tsk, obviously referring to his tendency to hop onto your stream unprompted. Whether he actually listens to your demands is beyond you, “Peeping means cheating.”

“For the love of fuck all, can we get back to the three dead bodies, please? Because I’m about to have a second coming of Christ moment and taste my consumed, digested beer for the second time.” Charlie interjects.

“I mean, anyone have any ideas who’d do this?” Dream takes hold of the conversation. Quiet, disappointed nos greet him. They have nothing to go on, no clues, not even a subliminal message. With everyone scattered, there is no way of locating the actual bodies and drawing a long red trail leading back to you. 

You’re too good at lying, and Dream is too good of a publicist. People tend to trust his judgement, which is his main asset (besides his calm demeanor of course). When the Among Us gods chose you as Impostor, they made sure you had every advantage. 

“Who-Who do you think it is, Dream?” Ash questions, “I trust you. I do. Just know that.”

“No fucking clue.”

“Y/n?” She tries again.

“Same. I’m a bit worried, though.”

“Let’s, uhhh, let’s skip?” Sykkuno offers. The consensus is to start voting at six. Your new mission is to make sure you dwindle the numbers down drastically before that can happen. You have no qualms about sacrificing Dream in order to meet your goals, either. Absolutely cold blooded.

Back at Cafeteria, there are words exchanged about Quackity’s body just laying there, forgotten. Blame is shifted: how come we didn’t notice sooner? Where’s Rae? And you mindlessly go along with their mourning, not really paying attention. Dream leaves with Charlie and Sykkuno, Corpse requests you stay with him and you sprout fake apologies. Not his time yet. Us girls need to stick together!, you sing, following after Ashley and getting further and further away from him, going deeper and deeper into the labyrinth of the spaceship.

You find yourself in Security with her, her cute astronaut pressed to the cameras, watching the live feed, “Let’s lurk here, okay? Maybe we’ll see something.” If only she saw who was standing behind her. 

“Who do you think is the Impostor?” You ask, standing in the doorway, “Or, more like, who are the Impostors?”

“Honestly?” She ends her word with a little sigh, “I think it might be Corpse and Bretman. I haven’t seen them at all this game.”

You smile, raising your brows, tilting your heard, and you sound so kind, like a dear old friend about to deliver a tender message, “...Have you seen me?”

“SHIT!”

Too late. In one smooth motion she joins the afterlife. You cut the lights, venting mindlessly till you spot Corpse and Bretman panicking in Weapons. Your existence is still a mystery to them.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck--” Corpse mumbles, “Bretman, don’t you dare fucking kill me right now.”

“I’m not Impostor!”

“Okay, I’ll drink to that.”

They rush out of Weapons, most likely on their way to Electrical, and you trail after them like the Grim Reaper itself, biding your time till you can deliver the killing blow.

“Corpse?!” You call out, mild panic ringing in your voice, “Is that you?”

“Shit, Y/n? Where are you?” He questions. Crew vision is so sad, so small, how can he not see you standing almost right next to him? “Where’s Ash?”

“I dunno,” You say, “when the lights went out I ran. Please don’t kill me.”

“I’d never do that, baby.”

Too easy. They’re all too fucking easy. You bite your lower lip, trying to stop the laugh bubbling in your chest, to stop the lightheaded dizziness that overcomes you with a rush of excitement. 

“Thanks, pretty boy.” You mutter, and it sounds a bit lower than you intended, a bit darker, something sinister lurking underneath cotton candy words. It instantly clicks in Bretman and he makes a noise, something like a whine, and you see him backing away, “I know I can always trust you.” 

Whether Corpse notices the odd shift in tone, he doesn’t show it, “I like it when you call me that.” Is all he says, and you hear the smile in his voice, the appreciation. The trek to Electrical is all but forgotten. You slowly make your way to Bretman, “Where are you? Come here.”

“Just a minute,” You say cheerily, “I just need to kill Bret first.”

“Holy shit.”

“N-” Your victim’s sentence is cut off in a second, and you can’t contain your manic cackle this time, because the screen bleeds red, the words VICTORY splattered on it, depicting yours and Dream’s sneaky astronauts. You’re still laughing as the voices of your fallen friends ring in your ears.

“Y/n, what the fuck, you’re an actual monster.” Dream says, but there’s no actual weight behind his words, each syllable punctured with a laugh.

“I knew the second she asked me about my favorite scary movie that I’d get the chop.” James states.

“Wait, Y/n, did you kill everyone?” Corpse questions.

“She fucking did!” Dream answers for you, “I got Charlie and Sykkuno, and barely at that. What the fuck.”

“I’ve been waiting so fucking long for this.” You admit, giggling, raising you glass, “I toast to you, Dream. My perfect partner in crime.”

“I didn’t really do shit, but cheers.”

Quackity heaves a heavy sigh, “Y/n, Y/n, you don’t actually think I’m weird, right? Right?”

“No, she does.” James chimes.

“WHAT THE FUCK DID I EVER DO TO YOU, DUDE?!”

More commotion, more noise, and you just sit there, buzzed, snickering, reading the chat as the rest agree to play another round. You thank the people who donated that you had accidentally missed among the, you know, murder, reply to a few questions, bow dramatically to the many praises and invisible flowers you receive for such beautiful assassin work. When you look back at the screen, you throw your head back with a maniacal laugh.

Impostor again, only this time it’s with Charlie. Family bonds are often restored when united under a common goal. You’re so happy. So happy. You weren’t done terrorizing your friends yet.

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos​ - @fairywriter-oracle​ - @tsukishimawh0re​ - @ofstarsanddreams​ - @bbecc-a​ - @annshit​ - @leahh19​ - @letsloveimagines​ - @bellomi-clarke​ - @wineandionysus​ - @guiltydols​ - @onephootinfrontoftheother​ - @liamakorn​ - @thirstyfangirl​ - @lilysdaydreams​ - @pan-ini​ - @mxqicshxp​ - @tanchosanke​ - @yoshinorecommends​ - @flightsandfantasy​ - @liljennyx3​ - @bingusmode - @unknown-and-invisible​ - @sinister-sleep​ - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat​ - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit​ - @unstableye​ - @simonsbluee​ - @shinyshimaagain​ - @ppopty​ - @siriuslystupid​ - @crapimahuman​ - @ofthedewthesunlight​ - @mythicalamphitrite​ - @artsyally​ - @corpsesimpp​ - @corpsewhitetee​ - @corpse-husbandsimp​ - @hyp-oh-critical​ - @roses-and-grasses​ - @rhyrhy462​ - @sparklylandflaplawyer​ - @charbkgo​ - @airwaveee​ - @creativedogs​ - @kaitlyn2907​ - @loxbbg​ - @afuckingunicornn​ - @fleurmoon​ - @yeolliedokai​

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

#corpse husband #corpse #corpse husband x reader #corpse x reader #corpse social media au #corpse husband x y/n #corpse husband fic #corpse husband social media au #social media au #myso #make you say oh #quackity #dream smp #corpse x y/n #imagine #imagines #reader #xreader

[babyboibucky]

Salt, Sugar and Viruses

Pairing: Office!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You’ve been secretly making coffee for Bucky at the office.

Word Count: 1,962

Warnings: Two idiots just doing idiot things

A/N: This was done in a haste so I kinda hate it lol but I can’t get this story out of my head and thanks to @bitchassbucky for pushing me to write a full fic of this 🥰 luv u 🥺

MAIN MASTERLIST

"You have a crush on Barnes' grumpy ass?!" Sam choked out.

You angrily hushed him and frantically looked around the pantry to make sure that your secret was still safe. Fortunately, only you, Sam and Nat were inside having your respective afternoon breaks.

"What? He's nice. And cute." you told Sam as you stirred your coffee, smiling to yourself at the thought of your office crush, Bucky.

"How'd you even meet him, he works all the way at the IT department." Sam asked.

Nat snorted recalling the encounters she witnessed for the past few months. Some of which were unintentional but most of them? You had carefully planned out just so you could come up with an excuse to request for Bucky's assistance.

"She might have gotten viruses in her computer once...or twice. Or thrice." Nat teased.

The first time you met Bucky was when most of your files suddenly got corrupted. It was hella embarrassing because you didn't know shit about how computers worked and well, you've been illegally downloading torrents since the office's internet connection was a gift from the internet gods. Without a doubt, your computer was a nest for viruses.

Bucky showed up in your floor that morning and you almost sunk into your seat from shame. You'd heard the IT Department complain about everybody else in the office messing up their computer systems. When you turned around, Bucky greeted you with a charming smile and soft hello. You could still remember how he felt when he stayed behind you as you sat on your chair, bending over to take your mouse in his hand.

God, he smelled so good you almost turned your head to nuzzle your face into his neck.

He was very soft-spoken you realized; Bucky was kind enough to walk you through the process and to be honest, you couldn't recall a damn thing he said. Something about firewalls? And shields? Whatever, you didn't really listen. You just stared at Bucky as he explained everything, solving your problem in less than fifteen minutes.

Since then, your crush for Bucky grew bigger. You'd entered the elevator together a couple of times, shared small conversations that made your heart flutter. When those little moments didn't seem enough, you started your devious plan to fuck up your computer a bit. By the third time Bucky fixed your computer, he was already comfortable enough to tease you for being a "virus magnet".

"Hello? Young lady, come back to earth." Sam snapped his finger right in front of your face, interrupting your thoughts.

You clicked your tongue at him and swatted his hand away. "If you ever tell this to anyone, Wilson. You are dead." you warned, poinitng a finger at him.

Sam rolled his eyes, "It's so unfair how he's kind to you. Last time I requested for his assistance he got all smug and grumpy at me." he complained.

Nat shook her head in amusment, "That's because you've been downloading porn. You know the IT department can access our browser histories, right?"

You choked on your coffe, "WHAT?!"

Nat narrowed her eyes at you, "You been up to no good for you to react like that?"

You faceplamed, "I've been stalking his Facebook account."

Sam chortled, "What are you, in high school? Jesus, calm down. You're gonna be fine. Why don't you just tell him you like him?"

You made a face, "I'm not Nat to have the guts to do that."

Nat hummed, bringing her mug to the sink to wash it. "Why don't you start by making him coffee?"

"I don't know how he likes his coffee."

You received a pointed look from both your friends. You groaned in defeat, "Okay, fine. I know how Bucky likes his coffee."

Nat smirked, "Stalker."

-

Bucky always arrived in the office half an hour before nine in the morning. This gives him time to settle into his cubicle, buy a sandwich at the stall downstairs and to make himself a cup of coffee. It was his daily routine and upon going back to his desk after buying his breakfast sandwich, Bucky was surprised to see a cup of newly brewed coffee on his desk.

He looked around but there were no signs of anyone. There wasn't even a note of some sort. Carefully, he brought the cup to his face and inhaled its scent. Shrugging, he took a tiny sip.

-

"How's the little secret admirer doing?" Nat asked, grabbing a chair and sitting down beside you.

You deadpanned, "I've been leaving him his coffee for an entire week now and nothing's happened yet."

Nat frowned, "Are you kidding me? Why would you expect for something to happen when you haven't been leaving any clues?" she said.

"I'm shy, okay?! Maybe I should hide somewhere, check for his reaction. See whether I have a chance." you shrugged.

It was stupid of you to leave the coffee on Bucky's desk. You never stayed to wait for him. You just left it there without a note or anything that would even give him a clue about you and your little crush on him. You knew the reason why, of course. You were afraid of rejection. Sometimes, you'd feel like you have a chance with him since he was always so kind and warm to you. Not to mention, everyone in the office knows him to be grumpy but around you, he was totally the opposite of that.

But then again, maybe he was just nice to you because you were nice to him too.

-

One morning after leaving Bucky his coffee, you finally decided to leave him a note. You ran back to your cubicle to get a post-it and a pen. Before you could even walk around your desk, you spotted Bucky headed over to the pantry, the cup of coffee in his hand.

"Fuck, okay. Maybe I should just directly ask him out?" you thought to yourself.

You quickly followed Bucky into the pantry and almost whined when you saw that Sam was inside as well. You widened your eyes at him, signalling for him to leave but Sam was preoccupied on observing Bucky who seemed to be in a bad mood.

"Rough morning?" Sam just had to ask as you awkwardly stood by the doorway, finding the right timing to butt in.

Bucky's forehead creased as he let out a huff, "Rough weeks, actually." he answered.

You opened your mouth to say something comforting, wanting to lift Bucky's spirits up but he turned around and glanced at you and then back to Sam.

"Does anyone hate me in this office?" Bucky asked.

You and Sam exchanged looks, both of utter confusion before shaking your heads in unison. "Why'd you ask?" Sam asked.

Bucky lifted the cup of coffee that you made, "Someone's been making me coffee." he stated.

You cleared your throat, "...is it bad?" you asked.

Bucky made a face, "Terrible actually."

Ouch.

"I mean, the first time I saw it I was actually flattered. And then I took a sip and it's just...salty." Bucky said, pouring the coffee into the sink before throwing it into the bin.

Sam's head snapped towards your direction, his face almost red from biting back a laugh. Your face heated up at the realization that you've been putting salt into Bucky's coffee instead of sugar. All this time. You wanted to disappear right then and there. And Sam had to be the one to witness your huge failure.

"I thought it was a mistake since the next day, there was another coffee on my desk. I tried it out and it's still salty. It lasted a week, you guys. And I was dumb enough to keep on tasting it in hopes that it might have been a genuine mistake. But now I'm starting to think that someone hates me that much to fuck my coffee up." Bucky explained, face scrunched up into a mixture of irritation and curiosity.

Sam failed to stifle his laughter and exploded, "Funniest shit I've ever heard." he told Bucky before standing up and making his way to the door where you stood.

Your face was red and if the salt and sugar mishap was already humiliating enough, Sam decided to make things even worse for you.

"You really need to check the labels before pouring shit into his coffee." and with that, Sam gave your shoulder a squeeze before leaving the pantry.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath and tried to calm yourself. When you opened them, Bucky was staring at you with an expression you couldn't paint.

"Did you...were you the one leaving me coffee?" he asked.

You secretly pinched yourself in the arm to check whether you were just dreaming. Fuck, you hoped you were having a nightmare but the pain that you felt made it clear that you totally fucked up.

You nodded in embarrassment.

"You hate me that much?" Bucky asked in disbelief, as if he was offended that out of all people, it had to be you.

You quickly shook your head, "No, God no! I just...it's because I..." you stammered, trying to find the courage to spit out the words you've been dying to tell Bucky.

Bucky tilted his head, "Because you...?" he urged.

Your hands balled into fists as you let out another deep breath. Bucky probably hates you right now, but whatever. This was your only chance and to hell, you were going to confess.

"Because I like you?"

You didn't think that Bucky's confused look could even turn more...well, confused. But he was looking at you incredulously as though you've grown a second head, or a third head.

"You like me so you decided to put salt in my coffee?" he asked again.

You honestly didn't know who sounded even more stupid now, you or Bucky. Because if he still didn't understand what was going on, he was dense as fuck.

"No!" you explained. "I wanted to make you a decent cup of coffee but I guess I was too careless and didn't realize that I've been putting in salt instead of sugar." you said.

Bucky didn't say anything after that. He just stared at you, but he didn't seem confused anymore. If any, he looked like he was processing the entire situation.

"You like me." he stated again.

Will your embarrassment ever end?!

"Yes, Bucky. And I messed up my chance and you know what? I'm just going to show myself out and leave you alone." you told him and forced a fake grin before attempting to walk out.

A hand gripped your wrist, pulling you back into the pantry. This time, Bucky was the one who looked embarrassed.

"I might have...done something pretty stupid too." he said, avoiding your gaze as he rubbed the back of his neck.

You eyed him suspiciously, "What do you mean?"

"I uhh...I did something to your computer...the day before you requested for my assistance for the first time." Bucky admitted shyly.

It was your turn to get muddled at Bucky's confession. "But why?" you asked.

Bucky offered a shy smile, "Because I've been seeing you around the building and thought you were cute."

And then everything clicked. It was a light bulb moment for the both of you.

"Oh. Ohhh okay. I see." you said before suddenly breaking into laughter.

Bucky joined you and scratched his head, "I guess we're both idiots." he said, placing his hands inside his pockets as he stared at you.

"This went...way more interesting than I thought." you said with a nod.

There was a pause before you decided to speak up, "So, do you want coffee?"

Bucky beamed at you as he nodded, "As long as you'll use sugar this time."

-

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#bbbwrites #oneshots: bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky x reader #bucky x you #sebastian stan #bucky #bucky fic #bucky barnes fic #bucky fluff #bucky barnes fluff

[workofheart]

eren jaeger relationship hcs

eren’s turn! modern relationship hcs. nsfw under the cut as per usual <3 levi ver.

really clingy. when ur away on a trip or something, he definitely cuddles your pillow and buries his head in it. might also spray your perfume on his hoodie so he can be reminded of you throughout the day (as if you aren’t already on his mind 24/7)

on that note, LOVES seeing you in his clothing. i feel like for most guys this is true and people mention it all the time, but eren especially. it makes him feel mushy and horny at the same time (more on that later) bc it just drapes over your shoulders perfectly. like he sees you and has to suck in a breath and look away to collect himself or else he’ll just become a puddle on the floor

likes hearing verbal affirmations. when you compliment him, tell him you’re proud of him, he gets all warm and fuzzy inside. it means so much coming from you and he knows you're genuine

really goofy, this is to be expected - tries to get you to laugh bc it raises his self esteem and confidence. he just likes looking at you being happy and smiling, it makes him feel so warm inside

definitely hides behind corners when he hears you walking or coming down the stairs so he can jump out and scare you. don’t worry though, because he always proceeds to hug you and kiss your forehead or temple to say he’s sorry but only kind of bc ur reaction was priceless. the little whack u give his arm in annoyance? he lovessss it bc it’s like he knows u still love him even when he is a little obnoxious

eren is definitely one of those enemies to lovers kind of guy bc he desperately wants someone to love him not necessarily in spite of his flaws, but with his flaws. he needs u to acknowledge that he’s far from a perfect person but still love him regardless

his favorite kind of dates are park dates. he likes going on warm & sunny days to throw a frisbee around with you in the open fields. i feel like he’s a basketball guy so he’ll bring you onto the court and play knockout... when he loses, will tell you he let you win on purpose for the sake of his ego 

lolll imagine him critiquing your free throw form or something and coming up behind you to fix it (it wasn’t actually that bad, he just wanted an excuse to be near you)

really needs physical touch. he’s the kind of guy who will always be in contact w you in some way or another. when driving, his hand will be on your thigh or holding yours on top of the center console, same for if you’re out at restaurants but under the table. he’d definitely try and play footsies with you if you’re sitting across from him rather than beside him. when sleeping, he holds you really tight and won’t let you roll over so you better just get comfortable. 

doesn’t mind being ur photographer and taking pics for you. he takes some time to learn the methods for the best pics but he eventually gets it

this is kind of random but when playing minecraft, he always blows up creepers and never fills in the creeper holes :| sorry. to make up for it he’ll get you music discs. also likes just going on little adventures to find a sand biome two thousand blocks away and just walking with you in game

on this topic actually i LOVE the idea of gamer bf eren. like not the league-and-monster-drinking kind but sumn about him in a headset and sitting at the edge of his bed... but he’ll definitely teach you how to play shooter games and will be so nice about it, won’t get mad at you, will give you little kisses when you’re not doing well and getting frustrated, and if you’re playing in online lobbies together he’ll stick by you the whole time and carry you

always sending you tiktoks & tries to get you to do all the trends with him. they never go viral but he goes back and watches them when he misses you

i peg him as a cat guy! really good with animals in general. i think most people would expect him to be a dog person since he can be loud and rowdy and excited, but on an emotional level i think he also just likes to be calm and relaxed and would get along with cats well. also teases you when animals reject you for him.

definitely writes about you in his journal. he jots down funny things you say or do or moments you shared so he never forgets any of them, and when he misses you he’ll read through them :( imagine when you’re so much older and he has documented proof of his love for you back when he was young please it makes me cry

also writes down little poetic words or things that remind him of you. he’ll hear a quote in a movie or a book or a song that instantly makes you pop into his head and he just has to write it down. he’s probably tried writing poems or songs about you, but he keeps those really secret because he’s embarrassed

this is kind of random but i think he’s a total beach person! likes going to spend days in the sun, builds sand castles and asks for your rating, drags you into the water to swim with him, will dive under and grab your ankles to freak you out, also looks really good in swim trunks but that's besides the point

he hates to see you upset and tries to cuddle the sadness out of you. when needs be, he’s a really good listener and doesn’t mind letting you just vent. when you cry, he pulls you in for a really tight hug and cradles your head - also because if he sees you crying, he’ll start to cry too because he genuinely feels for you 

tries his best to take care of you when you’re sick. not really a good cook or anything, but he’ll make you a grilled cheese or a pop tart, albeit a little crispy even though it’s his third attempt. doesn’t mind being near you and isn’t afraid of getting sick so he’ll cuddle you anyway

loses focus when you’re talking to him sometimes but it’s not because he’s not listening, it’s because he just gets caught up in staring at you and how you look when you talk bc he just adores you. when you snap him out of his, he always gets all red and blushy :(

nsfw under the cut (18+)

really likes sending & receiving nudes/lewds. he always goes for the torso selfie to show off his chest/abs when sending, and it doesn’t matter to him what you send back because he’ll like anything you have to offer

and his responses aren’t lame either. NOT the type to send you a thumbs up or a “ayo you sexy as hell fr doe” - he will hype you up with dirty talk because he seriously means it. honestly might just send you a voice message, or call you if you’re alone and available bc while he might look at pics of you from time to time for aesthetics, the majority of the time he’s jacking off

so you know how i said he likes seeing you in his clothing? he especially likes nudes of you in his clothes. send him a pic wearing his zip up hoodie & nothing else and he’s yours 

he prefers being in control/being on top but doesn’t mind if you want to take the reigns every once in a while

throws his head back and groans when u give him head. that's the image.

one of his favorite positions is when you’re in doggy but he pulls you up by the arms so your back is against his chest. he’ll snake a hand around to rub tight little circles on your clit, might put his hand around your throat if you like it. heavenly.

reallyyyy dirty mouth omg. asks sooo many teasing questions, likes hearing you say his name. “you like that, princess?” “louder for me” “who’s making you feel this good?” ugh and it’s not awkward either he makes it sound so good

has a lot of energy and a lot of stamina. stroke game will make you pass out, he’s so smooth and sets such a rhythm with his hips

things that get him going: kissing under his jaw, especially up by his ear. sucking his fingers. tugging on his hair. running your nails down his back.

pins your thighs to the bed when he eats you out. likes to make you squirm and loooves to edge you. super teasing in every way

can we just talk about his voice for a sec... he has the prettiest moans and isn’t afraid to let you know how he’s feeling. when you’re in missionary, he’ll hold himself up with one elbow, hold your hand with the other, and will lean down to moan right in your ear. sometimes does it on purpose bc he knows it turns you on from how you clench around him

usually has a death grip on that sensitive spot between your hips and your waist so he has something to hold on to while he pounds you

when he cums, he 100% buries his face in the crook of your neck, might even bite down from time to time 

can totally see him going harder if he knows there’s people around, he doesn’t care who it is that’s outside the door but they’re gonna hear how good he’s making you feel whether you like it or not

wants to see your face when you cum. will definitely tell you to cum for him and keep your eyes open when he’s really feeling it - your expression makes him nut so fucking hard lawwddd

daps u up after sex just cause he’s weird like that lol

#eren jaeger x reader #aot x reader #snk x reader #eren jaeger fluff #eren jaeger smut #eren jaeger headcanons #eren jaeger hcs #eren jaeger imagines #aot imagines #snk imagines #aot headcanons #eren hcs #eren headcanons #eren fluff #eren smut

[hansolmates]

distance learning (m)

banner done by the beautiful @eerieedits​

summary; after their first hookup, jungkook isn’t so sure whether you’re serious about being exclusive. after all, people say things during sex. jungkook takes it in his own hands to figure out where you stand, and he realizes soon enough that eavesdropping is a bad habit pairing; neighbor!jungkook x (f) reader genre/warnings; fluff, humor, crack, insecure!jk, unresolved sexual tension, stressed!mc, this is really just unnecessary drama bc drama is fun™, sexting, dom kook’s still a meanie in control, posession kink, cock slapping, a blowjob, cockwarming, unprotected, creampie, squirting, (wrap the pickle before u tickle folks) and of course the excessive use of the petname [redacted] w/c; 6.1k a/n; haaaaaa three months later im finally posting pt 2! i figured that no matter how many times i edit/reread at this point i think it’s time to finally let this beast go!!! enjoyyy click here for part 1: remote learning drabbles; 01

if you enjoy this, please considering giving our pasta couple a like n’share💚

It’s been a week since the thing.

The remote-controlled vibrator thing. 

The whole sappy-love-confesion-during-sex thing. 

Jungkook is antsy, tail tucked in, perpetually wondering whether he went too far. You seemed to like it, and Jungkook definitely loved it. It was spicy and dirty and hot, and at the same time Jungkook thought he really made progress in expressing his feelings for you. Not only that, you said you liked him back!

At least, he thought you did. 

“I really said I’d feed her lasagna and cum in the same sentence,” Jungkook bemoans into his pillow, which still lingers faintly of your Redken shampoo. “I’m disgusting. She thinks I’m disgusting.”��

People say things during sex, Jungkook knows that. In the throes of passion and pleasure, people will say anything that comes to their mind, anything that fits the mood. Of course, you’d be tied in and say you like him back. But did you like him back as a friend? As a fuckbuddy? As something more? 

“Fucking text her,” Taehyung is tired of Jungkook’s wallowing, everytime he checks in on the app developer he’s brooding in one of three places. Today’s his bedroom. Taehyung dips under the blankets, and steals Jungkook’s pillow right under his nose.

Jungkook suppresses a whimper, face melding into the blankets. Now that pillow is going to smell like Taehyung.

“Text her what,” Jungkook replies despondently. 

“I don’t know, something along the lines of ‘I wanna follow through with my proposition of feeding you my cum and lasagna—not simultaneously. Wanna go on a date this weekend?’ It’s that simple,” Taehyung gets up in Jungkook’s face, dark eyes forcing him to bore right in. “Want me to do it for you?” 

“Noo, I’m an adult I can—”

“I did it for you.” 

Jungkook nearly knocks into Taehyung’s hard head, sitting up straight when he notices his phone behind his roommate’s back. This is what he gets for sharing passwords. Thankfully, the message is cleaner than Taehyung’s words, and you’ve already replied. 

[1:23] Jungkook: would you like to go out for dinner this weekend? pasta and wine?

[1:25] You: it’s a busy week this week 🥺 raincheck? 

“Was the sex that bad?” Taehyung frowns, reading the message twice. 

“N-no,” Jungkook is sweating. He isn’t sure anymore. 

Taehyung hands Jungkook back his phone, slowly, as if you’ll reply back with a change of your mind. Jungkook is a deflated balloon on his bed, feeling like a bum in his ratty sweater and a dateless weekend. 

“It’s just that,” Taehyung puts a hand on his lip, mulling, “busy people don’t reply that fast. Like even if she wasn’t busy, there’s a fifteen-minute leeway before replying.” 

This silly rule overrides Jungkook’s mind for the rest of the week. 

The gyms have been reopened for months, and Jungkook’s trainer misses him dearly. Jungkook meets with Saeroyi in the morning, eager to get a few jabs in with some fresh equipment. He tries to move on, distract himself with a couple of pumps and a match with Saeroyi. It feels great to sweat it off, but it doesn’t help sway Jungkook’s incessant thoughts. 

The ball is in your court now, Jungkook has nothing to do but wait. Some people are just bad texters, maybe you just happened to have your phone near you when Taehyung sent the message. Maybe you just wanted to cut Jungkook off as quickly as possible so you decided to reply fast and rip the band-aid. 

No, you’re definitely not that cold-hearted. 

Re-entering his apartment complex, his eyes linger towards where your room lies on the first floor. It’s all the way at the end of the hallway, and he’s tempted to just confront you and make sure that what you and him really had is indeed, over. Conversely, you could just really be having a bad week and you genuinely do want a raincheck. 

Jungkook’s eyes trail to his form. Still in his gym clothes, and a little sweaty from the travel time. If he gets caught, he can just tell you he’s doing a cooldown by running across the hallways. Not the first time it’s happened, afterall it led him to you at one point. 

He breaks into a soft jog, making a beeline to your front door. His feet squish against your old welcome mat. You haven’t changed it since Halloween, and he smiles fondly at the black scripted “Boo Y’all” written in script next to a chibi-ghost. 

His heart beats faster as his hand lingers by the door, ready to knock. Deep breaths. Who knows, he could just be overthinking (like usual.) 

“Fuck, Hobi!” 

Jungkook freezes, his knuckles a centimeter away from your door. He backs up as if he’s been burned. His heart has fallen all the way down to his ass, and intends to stay there because now he feels like a damn fool. 

The bed is creaking relentlessly, a rhythmic pattern that has Jungkook’s face crumbling at every spring. Jungkook’s face hovers over the door, his ear brushing against the wood. 

“C’mon, bunny,” the male voice is teasing, “you know you love having me over. It would satisfy both of us if you’d just let it go.” 

Bunny. A cute pet name, for sure. The way it rolls off the stranger’s tongue is natural, as if he’s been saying it for years. But what about being his doll, is that not good enough? 

You’re huffy, taking deep breaths. He doesn’t want to hear anymore. Jungkook has put himself through enough self-wallowing for the week. What if he was just a stepping stone to meeting new people that will satisfy you better? What if you just needed one good orgasm to get your flow back, and Jungkook’s job is done? Sure, there were no strings attached when he proposed to have sex with you, but he thought… 

No more thinking. Jungkook jogs away from the door, even going so far is to jog all the way up to the penthouse. 

He hates this. 

You hate this. 

It’s been five days since Hoseok’s arrival, and you are going bonkers. Why couldn’t he get a hotel or an AirBnB? Because he’s cheap as fuck, that’s why. Your dinky cousin has been clinging to you like a lonely koala, and while you found it cute in the 5th grade, it doesn’t translate well nearly two decades later. 

Every morning is the same. You make a subpar toast and Nutella breakfast, letting Hoseok’s slices go cold as you log in for work. You’ve been clocking in earlier in the hopes to finish the majority of your tasks before Hoseok wakes up, because by then you can barely function. Once he wakes up, he’s relentless, bouncing on the bed and talking your head off while you try to concentrate on whatever your boss is telling you. Whenever he jumps too hard, your cheap mattress causes your laptop to fly, and the only thing you can do is curse him out. Sometimes he plays Disney movies and sings in tandem, choreography and all. 

You know that Hoseok is stressed and this is his outlet, and you don’t have it in you to stop his incessant habits. He’s visiting your area because of a lucrative job offer nearby and the interviews are sporadic, making Hoseok linger in your apartment for hours at a time until he’s summoned for whatever test they want to throw at him. 

Most of the interviews are in the evening, and it’s when you can clock back in and finish your leftover assignments while Hoseok is also working. By the time he returns, you’re dog tired and so is he. 

Every night, you try to move away from Hoseok’s clingy self, as he grapples onto your waist and slings a thigh over your belly. You wish it were someone else sharing the bed with you. 

If you bring Jungkook into the picture however, you’d be burnt for the week. Complete crumbs. It would be too much stimulation for you, having to balance work, Hoseok’s incessant attitude, and putting on a face for Jungkook. Your relationship with the penthouse neighbor is barely budding, hardly watered considering Hoseok’s sudden visit. You cling to the fact that in a couple days you would be giving your undivided attention to Jungkook, most of your priorities out of the way, and most importantly, you’ll have your own room back. 

Maybe you could surprise him by giving him a pasta dinner, just like he proposed. 

Unable to get the thought out of your head, you blindly reach for your phone on the nightstand. It’s late, very late for a workday. The blue screen burns your eyes a bit, but you're determined to at least check up on Jungkook. You can’t take too long, otherwise you won’t be able to sleep and get him out of your head. Dear, unassuming cousin Hoseok is fast asleep next to you, due to the fact it’s nearly midnight. Making sure not to disrupt him, you carefully cup your phone in your hands, putting it on the lowest light setting. 

[11:54] You: hey, hope work hasnt been as draining for u as it’s been for me  ☠️  what’s your opinion on pasta sauces, red or white? 

Jungkook is normally a fast texter, at least from your experience. It’s you that’s the sporadic texter, sometimes taking hours to reply, other times in seconds. It never really mattered until now, however. But it takes five, ten, and finally fifteen minutes before you get a response. 

[12:09] Jungkook: ??? 

You frown, wondering what you said wrong. 

[12:10] You: do you not wanna do pasta anymore? Are you craving something else now?

[12:10] Jungkook: i don’t think it’d work out 

[12:10] You: why? 

[12:11] Jungkook: im sure you know why, bunny. 

Strange. He’s never called you bunny before, and in your opinion you think he’d be the bunny in the relationship—soft and cuddly on the outside, and an absolute horn ball in bed. Is this some sort of weird power play? Is he being passive aggressive on purpose? Whatever this game is, you’re not into it. Grumbling under your breath, you snake out of bed, looking blindly for your slippers in the dark. You’ll be in and out of Jungkook’s apartment in ten minutes. 

Just as your hand brushes the doorknob, your new roommate calls for you. 

“Bunny?” Hoseok calls blearily, and you’re staring straight at his cookie-printed eye mask, “what time is it, where are you going?” 

“Um, out,” you reply shortly, “I forgot I left my laundry in the dryer.” 

“Oh, m’kay. Come back soon, y’know I can’t sleep alone.” 

It’s then you realize. Bunny. Jungkook thinks that Hoseok and you are a thing. He really needs to stop eavesdropping on you. 

You feel your pussy frown. Your cousin is such a cockblock and he doesn’t even know it. Without an answer, you slip through your door and into the first free elevator. As you zing up the floors with the magical 1234 code, you work and rework your hair in and out of its style, wondering if you’ll look more presentable with your hair messy or thrown back. 

As soon as you reach the penthouse, you burst into action. “Jungkook!” you cry, pounding the front door, “it’s a misunderstanding, open up!” 

The door immediately swings open after the first three knocks, and you punch Taehyung in the chest. 

“You look awful,” Kim Taehyung drawls. Taehyung is wearing nothing but a cranberry red silk kimono, and you have to avert your eyes and focus on his face, which is even worse because he’s looking at you like an all-knowing psychic. 

“Gee, thanks,” you try to move past him, but he’s blocking the door. 

“Jungkook’s in a meeting with some foriegn developers,” Taehyung talks with his hands, pretending like he has any idea of the nature of his roommate’s job, “when it’s this late he doesn’t leave his office until morning. Door’s locked.” 

“Well then, can you relay a message?” 

“Depends, is this message going to hurt him further?” 

Oh my goodness, when Taehyung wants to be he is such an enabler. “Tell Jungkook he’s done wallowing. Instead of jumping to conclusions, maybe he should’ve just asked me why we couldn’t go on a date this week.” 

“You could’ve also just told him you have a man on the side.” 

“Ohmygod you two are two iotas of a combined braincell!” you shove your hands in your pocket, hotly scrolling through your phone so you can shove a picture in his face. “This is Jung Hoseok, my cousin who derailed my plans this week by crashing in my too-tiny apartment and forced me to raincheck with Jungkook. He’s a blabbermouth and would tell everyone—my parents, my grandparents, my great-aunts—about Jungkook if he found out I was dating, and I’m not ready for that,” you zoom in on the picture, despite the fact that the screen is practically touching Taehyung’s nose, “and the reason Hoseok calls me bunny is not sexual—you two are fucking gross—I had front tooth problems in elementary school and I had a brace on my two big teeth, it was not pretty.” 

“Ah, bunny.” Taehyung echoes with wide eyes, looking at you as if you’re now the one with sage wisdom, “it all makes sense now.” He gulps, taking in the old photo of a mini-Hoseok and you, yourself frowning to cover your huge braces and Hoseok trying to pull your gums apart with his greasy little fingers. 

Satisfied by Taehyung’s evident squirming, you decide you’re too tired to further this interaction. “Tell the other half of your cell for me, will ya?” You’re already turning away, pressing repeatedly at the elevator button, “I would love to go on a date with him as soon as he gets his head out of his ass.” 

Jungkook is tired, but not tired enough to murder Taehyung and make it look like an accident. 

When he has late meetings, Taehyung is usually quieter around the apartment, and even gets Jungkook a hot meal once he wakes up in the afternoons. Today, Jungkook slept through and through. Normally he’d wake up midway to Taehyung’s television dramas, or the clanging of last night’s dishes but nope, not a peep. 

And today’s hot meal is takeout from Jungkook’s favorite ramen restaurant. That only means one thing—something has gone to shit and Taehyung feels guilty. 

Jungkook sips his tonkotsu impossibly slow, hearing Taehyung’s words—your words from last night—clear as day. Taehyung even describes in detail where the nickname bunny comes from, down to how miserable you looked in the photo with your monstrously metal-bent teeth. Oh, how he wishes he can swaddle you between the blankets, hold you and comfort you while you deal with your family. 

[2:45] Jungkook: doll, im so sorry

[2:45] Jungkook: please, i booked us a weekend at that new spa that just opened downtown. The tickets are flex, so if your cousin doesn’t leave by then week we can always reschedule 

[2:51] Jungkook: baby doll… 

This is far worse than believing you didn’t like him. Now Jungkook is antsy, knowing you deserve all the space in the world because of how silly he was being. You owe him nothing. If he just waited it out until you were ready, he wouldn’t be in this mess. He’s potato-esque throughout the day, thankfully Taehyung gives him space as he watches hours of mindless television. 

You don’t reply until very late into the night. 

[10:10] You: IM ALIVE--barely!! And mr. jeon, you’re not only a triple texter, but an ellipsis texter???? You’re asking for trouble

Jungkook has no shame, immediately texting you back. He can’t help it, he’s smitten. 

[10:12] Jungkook: taehyung explained everything. It’s all his fault. Don’t ask why, it’s his fault. Im so sorry. 

[10:12] You: mm, it’s okay. Just a misunderstanding. I was pretty upset last night, but i’ve been pretty tired this week so my fuse is short. 

[10:14] Jungkook: you should go to sleep now, doll. We’ll have time together after your cousin leaves

[10:14] You: just a couple more minutes. Miss u and your cute face 

[10:16] Jungkook: 

[10:16] Jungkook: will this hold u off until saturday?

Jungkook is a pile of goo. Pink, warm, happy heart-glittered goo. It takes a minute for you to reply, and for that whole minute Jungkook is kicking his legs under the sheets of his bed like an eager five-year old who just gave his crush his Valentine. Maybe it’s taking you so long to reply because you’re trying to send a selfie of your own, running off to the bathroom to take a cute selfie if your cousin is asleep in bed. 

[10:19] You: fuck, i kno that’s supposed to be a cute selfie, but i want you so bad. I want to sit on your face, let your lips glisten with my pussy as i cum all over that pretty face

[10:19] You: i wanna touch myself so badly but fuckin’ hoseok is out here snoring like he’s gon hack a lung. Panties are so wet 🥺🥺 your doll is needy for you, wanna be played with

[10:20] Jungkook: lfjsdl;fkjs;fjsoisfoisljsdfsdklfjsdklf 

He throws his phone across the bed, feeling himself twitch in his red flannel pyjama bottoms. The thought of you so hot and needy when you’re ten floors down has Jungkook absolutely livid. He doesn’t know how he’s going to talk to you, comfort you without missing you like crazy. 

Jungkook thinks back to what he has in his fridge. His contractor sent him a cheese assortment, maybe he can bring it down pretending to be a friendly neighbor. Maybe Hoseok can go to the convenience store to conveniently grab a bottle of wine. He can make both of you cum in five minutes, flat. 

Akin to a dumb, horny teenager, he sighs. He rubs his palm longingly over his member. He’s horny, but he’s also eager to see your face. Talk to you, get reacquainted with your routine and sneak his way into it. He wants to be a part of your life, and he’s hoping you will too. 

[5:02] You: Jungkook, you left me hanging last night

[5:05] Jungkook: baby doll… i wouldnt have been able to handle myself if we continued

[5:06] You: so you decided to dip :( 

[5:06] You: could u play with your doll a lil bit, kook? Hobi left for another interview

[5:08] You: PNG.0901

Jungkook was a fool to believe that you would drop him like that. No, Jungkook can see now that you two are a match made in heaven. You have a bite, never afraid to speak your mind when needed. This translates to a hunger you shamelessly share with Jungkook, both sexual and romantically intimate. He almost wishes he could’ve seen you act like a bitch to Taehyung last night, he can only imagine how sexy you looked telling him off. 

He has the technology to blow up your picture, the one that’s currently having him close his laptop and shove it to the side. He spreads his legs further across his glass desk, trying to find comfort between his tight pants as he absorbs every bit of your skin. 

It’s nothing too risque, but it’s nothing short of sensual. The room is dark, but it’s very clearly a picture of your hand between your thighs. Again, you’re between your wall and bed, squished between your office chair with your legs spread as far as they can go. Your skin is so soft looking, plush as you press two fingers between your damp panties. Adorable. 

[5:12] Jungkook: you know why i never replied last night? Because i was too busy jacking off to your dirty words doll. U really need your mouth washed

[5:12] You: wanna wash it with something else🍆

[5:12] You: please kook, i need something. Hoseok will come home soon and i might rip his head off. Help prevent a murder

Jungkook chuckles, clutching his phone closer to his body. He loves how much you’re opening up to him. Last week feels like so long ago, how you were all flushed and wide-eyed at the proposition of sex. He thinks you two can have a lot of fun getting to know each other, both emotionally and physically. 

[5:15] Jungkook: i was gonna wait until i sent this, but i think my doll needs it. Here’s what i was doing last night

[5:17] Jungkook: MP4.13

He… has a meeting in five minutes. A very important, very serious meeting. Jungkook jacked off enough last night, now it’s your turn. He hopes you like it. It’s not a very long video, barely a twenty-second clip of him fisting his cock. Taehyung was still home at the time, so he had to keep quiet. However, he couldn’t get the image of you out of his head that night, rubbing your thighs together in a cramped mattress as you try to erase the dirty thoughts of him. A murmur of your name, and the image of his precum dripping down his knuckles. You hope it’s enough. 

[5:34] You: u make everything so much easier💜✨

[5:35] You: MP4.234

Two minutes. The video you send is even shorter than his, barely fifteen seconds. You’re in a much more comfortable position, horizontal on the bed. Your shirt is ridden up to the underside of your breasts, one hand clutching your bare breast so hard he can see your cotton plush skin bulging between your fingers. The other hand has your panties shifted to the side, three fingers in your sopping cunt. 

“Mmh—fuck, f-uck Jungkook—” the words are mere breaths, puffs of air as you reach your orgasm. 

His call connects. He nearly drops his phone on the glass.  

“Jungkook!” Andreas from Germany wishes him brightly, “you look great, glowing even!” 

Jungkook blushes, and mutters something about having to go to the bathroom before they start. 

Taehyung makes himself scarce on Saturday. He packs a duffel bag for himself and takes the PlayStation, knowing it’ll be a long weekend at Jimin’s. 

Jungkook is on livewire for the morning. He even express-delivers a pasta roller to his house, and he spends all morning testing out the perfect pasta dough. His black apron is covered in flour, and he can barely comprehend the tutorial that’s teaching him on his flatscreen. 

He’s on autopilot. He hasn’t contacted you since he sent that selfie, and he doesn’t intend to. Jungkook understands why you made yourself scarce in the beginning of the week, preferring to raincheck and pin your relationship for a better time. Jungkook’s brain is overridden with you, swollen with thoughts of you. You would never be able to focus if you kept in contact like you did last night, especially if you can’t get away from Hoseok. 

Absence surely makes the heart grow fonder. 

Slapping his hands against his trousers, he surveys his handiwork. His pasta is appropriately floured and wrung, each handful of fresh dough wrapped in little nests. Off the stove is a bechamel sauce, a base ready to be cooked in whatever kind of pasta dish you want. He thinks the two of you would have fun making your own non-traditional pasta dishes. 

The soft knocks on his front door interrupts his train of thought, and he knows it’s you. 

You stand in front of the door, impossibly small in a large shirt and a plain pair of leggings. At the sight of Jungkook, a smile as warm and sweet as hot chocolate worms its way to your face, and you collapse into his arms. 

He sighs gratefully, sinking into your small body. When he pulls away, he can’t help but frown at your apparent exhaustion. You must’ve come back from something tedious, because sweat dots your brow and your eyes are still puffy and dark. Your chest arches bonelessly into his, hoping to melt in his embrace. 

“Hi,” you say.

“Hey,” he replies. 

“It’s Saturday.” 

“It is Saturday.” 

You rub your nose between the fabric of his button down, “I should’ve been more specific when I wanted to raincheck on you,” you murmur into the white cotton. 

“No, I’m sorry for jumping to conclusions,” Jungkook whispers, even though you’re the only two people on the floor, “I’ll make it better, yeah? I’m going to love you so good tonight, won’t have to lift a finger—” 

You shake your head, looking at him calmly. “Jungkook, it’s been a long week. Hobi got the job, I spent all this morning moving his two-ton speaker set into his new apartment. I don’t want anything gentle. I want you to rail me into next week,” Jungkook chokes on his saliva when you reach to cup his dick through his pants, already sporting a chub, “fuck me breathless. I want—no, I need this.”

Anything for you, but Jungkook isn’t going to let your mouth runneth over that easily. He wants that too, obviously. But again, you’ve made him wait. 

Bending slightly, Jungkook whispers darkly into your ear, “Who said you can decide the rules here, doll?”  he’s been waiting all week to slip back into this persona, one that has you shivering delightfully under his touch. A small, secret smile tucks itself under your lips as you tilt your head down, but Jungkook catches it. It shows you’ve missed it too. He lets your sneaky smile  slide for now, only because he’s missed you so much and you’ve had a long day. 

“If I wanna fuck you rough, I’ll fuck you rough. If I want to edge you until you're sobbing on the corner of the kitchen table, I’ll do it,” Jungkook spits every declaration into your skin, biting at your shoulder so hard you cry deliciously. 

He drags you over to the living room, and he could sing at how easily you follow directions. Both of you have been tied up this week, and some hard sex would definitely ease that frustration, “Knees,” Jungkook commands, and you waste no time sinking to the floor, hands atop your knees. 

You look up through your lashes, eyes big and glassy. His poor girl is tired, and he finds it all the more attractive that you’re willing to push that aside to make eachother feel good. 

“Pretty, pretty,” he chants, pulling down his pants and letting his dick spring free, “suck.” 

You waste no time, and he watches as your eyes dilate over the expanse of his cock, half-hard and ready for your mouth. Your nails dig into your knees as you start with featherlight kisses, finally turning into sloppy smacks as you lick all over his dick. 

Jungkook groans, weaving a hand into your hair to force his dick down your throat. You gag at the sudden intrusion, but it doesn’t stop you from taking it like a champ. Hard, deep thrusts that he’s sure you can feel all the way in your stomach. You gag at each thrust, but don’t let up as your hot tongue wraps him up and licks at the pre-cum. 

“Fuuuuck, doll,” he rips you away, his now hard dick springing away. He’s a little shaky on his knees, but he plants his feet down as he grips his cock, slapping the tip of it across your cheek. It smears your face, glossing your flushed cheeks in a mixture of your saliva and pre-cum. “Are you trying to make me cum first? So sweet, you don’t even care if you cum tonight, hmm? You owe me, making you believe you had another man.” 

This isn’t true, of course. The both of you know it was just miscommunication, but it doesn’t hurt to play it up for pleasure. 

“N-no Kook, I’m yours,” you grapple at his pants, pulling them down so he can get them off completely. 

“Right. You’re. Mine.” With every punctuated word is a light slap to your cheek, and you take it. His cock bounces right off of you, until you finally move your head to suckle at the engorged tip, “I’m keeping you forever, doll. Don’t you know that?” 

Throughout this whole process, you don’t move, other than the minute clawing at your knees. You’re so good to him. Jungkook pulls away and ignores the ache in his member for now, taking off your clothes for himself. It’s like unwrapping a gift, revealing every bit of skin reserved for his viewing. “So sexy,” he remarks once he’s got you bare, pulling you onto the couch. He’s still in his button down shirt, his date night shirt, sleeves rolled up to the elbow. However, he lets your hands inch under the stiff fabric, feeling for his taut muscle. 

He guides your aching cunt to his cock, sinking you down. It’s a tight fit, and you both moan at the brush of contact. Despite not being prepped, you’re still slick, and it makes up for it. He doesn’t thrust up or anything, just guides his lips to yours with a threadbare brush of his finger. 

“Kook, d-do you want me to move?” you mumble against his cherry-flavored lip balm. 

“Good dolls don’t move until they’re told,” your eyes widen innocently at the statement, and you crumple against his mouth, at his next words, “cum like this.” 

“Awh shit, please no,” you tear up, burying your head between the crook of his neck, “I can’t wait.” 

“Thought you wanted me to fuck you into next week. You can’t do this one little favor for me?” he’s being so mean, and you hate him for it. Haven’t you earned it? “C’mon baby, I thought you wanted me?” 

It’s silent, save for the soft Italian restaurant music playing from whatever tutorial he’s hooked up to his television. It’s terribly cliche, like you’re in the porno version of a European romance movie. He thinks nothing of it, not when your juices are dripping on his thighs, your skin soft and pliant in his grip. Jungkook drums his fingers against your spine, seemingly uncaring that you’re stuffed deep into your womb. 

On the other hand, it’s the only thing you’re acutely aware of. His thick, warm cock is nestled between your folds, right where it should be. You clench once, twice, thankful that this isn’t some crazed wet dream. States of sleep and consciousness have blurred this week, you’re lucky that you made it all the way up to Jungkook’s apartment. 

You can’t cum like this. You need to bait him. You moan, the sound slow and rumbly against your throat as you weave your fingers through his dark tresses. Moving the strands aside to kiss his cold metal earrings you murmur, “I love this, Kookoo. I’ve wanted you all week, I was going crazy. I kept playing last week in my head over and over. I even put in my little vibrator, hoping you’d pull up the app.” 

Jungkook’s teeth clench, and his grip is borderline painful as it digs into your hips. 

“I haven’t been able to cum all week, and I want to do it all over you,” you husk, playing with the roots of his hair. 

You can feel yourself dripping, wetness lubricating you even further and probably staining his thighs and couch with your arousal. Every second that passes is killer, and the fluttering towards your pussy tighten further as Jungkook’s cock twitches in response. Your pussy continues its ministrations, butterfly-like flaps against his hot member that have you vibrating.

“Mm, oh, I’ll cum for you,” and surprisingly, you might be able to. All this dirty talking has gotten you riled up. Just a little bit more and—

Jungkook shoves you off his cock, forcing you to land on the couch. 

“No!” you cry, wiping your face. Your cheeks are ruddied, and you’re annoyed. The coolness of the autumn air has you feeling chilly, and you want to scream at Jungkook for disrupting your orgasm. You feel empty. 

You’re not annoyed for long however, as Jungkook flips you on your back and gives you what you’ve been craving. 

“You glide right in, don’t ya doll,” the friction is deliciously blazing, his hands pushing you further into the large couch as he takes you from behind. Hot, fast smacks against your ass come from the way his balls bounce back and forth as he pistons his cock in and out. “F-fuck, you’re so good to me. So good, I love having you like this. All pretty and dripping, you really know how to make a guy wait, huh?” 

“Mmph! N-no—hng, but I’m y-yours, Kook,” you garble out, and you’re practically eating the throw pillow you’re propped up on as he slams you further into the cushions, so hard you may fall off, “all yours, honey. N-no more waiting. I want you, want you so badly—ah fuck!” 

“It’s worth it, you’re worth it,” he says over and over, his thrusts becoming sporadic and losing their rhythm once he feels you clenching uncontrollably. He presses his two fingers to your sloppy bud, swirling around the juices eagerly. “C-cum, baby doll. You deserve it, yeah? Cum on this cock, let go.” 

You’re starting to see spots, black and white alike. Finally shying away from his cock you rest on your back, but Jungkook doesn’t stop his fingers from flying across your clit. One look at his face and you’re gone. Pretty brown eyes, overflowing with affection. The feeling is different, and it’s the acute pressure between your stomach and pussy that makes you notice what’s going on with your body. The pressure finally releases, your eyes fluttering shut as you rest your cheek on the cushions. You dissolve, a mess on the couch as white hot liquid ejects from your body, spraying Jungkook’s thighs and cushions. 

“Y-you just,” your lover’s mouth is parted open like a baby kitten, uncaring as to how the dark liquid stains his couch fabric. 

“Squirted?” you answer breathlessly, a melty smile on your lips, “y-yeah.” 

 It sets him off, a button left dormant until now. The thatches of hair that surround his cock are dripping with your mess, a cold reminder that he got you to this high. He doesn’t hesitate to slip his cock back into you, and you gasp at the overstimulation. You try not to focus on how your body is a bundle of lit nerves, only to help Jungkook reach his completion. 

“S-so perfect,” he warbles, pressing kisses to your jaw, chin, lips. Each thrust is deep, thick and heady with emotion. “Mm, I wanna cream this pussy sooo badly—mm, all mine, all wet and warm and so so sweet—” 

He cries out your name, biting into your shoulder as your walls fill further with his hot cream. Your thighs are shaking from sensory overload, and Jungkook has to hold you down and soothe you into a state of reality to cling on. 

Satiated, he nuzzles into your chest, feeling absolutely featherlight. 

“T-thank you,” you say gratefully, when at least three out of your five senses return to your body. Your hands dip down to clutch his cheek, pinching lightly at the warm skin.

“Don’t thank me yet,” Jungkook exhales into your breasts, “d-didn’t even feed you my cum yet.” 

You scoff, pinching his cheek again. You’re aware of his softening cock between your folds, ready to seep the efforts of today’s coupling, but your stomach says otherwise. You crane your neck to make note of the kitchen island, staring curiously at the metal pasta roller and the little nests of carby goodness that decorate the cutting board. 

“Feed me pasta first, please. You have all night to feed me dessert.” 

Jungkook giggles into your stomach, he doesn’t mind feeding you in that order. 

bonus.

“So.” 

“So?” you have cream sauce on your lips, happily slurping on an angel hair. 

“You haven’t told me you liked me back yet,” Jungkook rests his palm in the swell of his cheek, content with watching you eat from where he’s standing on the counter. He leans his upper body across the marble table, muscles rippling against his white shirt. 

“Oh, I did!” you’re affronted, swinging your legs on the high chair, “I totally did last week!” 

“Yeah, well. Can you say it while I’m not inside you?” 

“Okay,” you blink, quirking him with a simple smile, “I like you.” 

“That was anticlimactic,” Jungkook jokes at the brevity of your confession, yet his heart betrays the charm he finds in the three words. 

You scoff, jabbing your fork in the little next of springy noodles. “What do you want to hear? I’ve wanted you since I’ve moved in? I think you’re really handsome when you pace the hallway doing work on your phone? I like the way you cook?” 

“Keep going,” Jungkook sing songs, walking over to hug you from behind.

The stool swings back and forth as he rocks the two of you, softly and slowly so you don’t throw up your dinner. He noses into your neck, inhaling your scent and committing it to your memory. 

“Mm, dessert first,” you insist, twirling around the stool so you can wrap your legs around his waist. “And then I can tell you exactly how much I like you,” your fingers play with the buttons of his shirt, walking the pads of your fingers across his chest. 

Jungkook grins, hands reaching to cup your bottom and bring you to his bedroom. Of course, he’s always willing to satisfy your insatiable appetite. 

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