#school trauma

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Too many autistic people are so traumatised by school, that they can’t attend at all…

Neurodivergent_lou

#autism #actually autistic #school #trauma #school trauma #anxiety #executive dysfunction #communication difficulties #masking #special interests #neurodivergence #neurodiversity #actually neurodivergent #feel free to share/reblog #neurodivergent_lou (Facebook)

[coyote-in-the-mirror]

Maybe I want to be a damn beast.

Maybe I want to feel strong and scary and powerful when I've been nothing but small and weak.

Maybe I want to strike fear into the hearts of others because everyone scares me.

Maybe I want to hurt people because they've hurt me, and I'm tired of just brushing it off so I don't get hurt further.

Maybe I want to be a beast to protect the pup who lives inside me still, who couldn't protect himself. Who no one protected when he needed it the most.

#otherkin #therian #alterhuman #therianthropy #werewolfkin #wolfkin #I had my typical school nightmare but instead of accepting being yelled at I began to crush the windpipe of the teacher #I was screaming and crying and trying to kill her #I want revenge for the traumatized kid I still am #trauma #school trauma #orias snarls #I've probably posted something similar before please bear with me lol

[bunnighost]

#school violence #bullying #school trauma #actuallytraumatized #trauma vent #upl #vent edit #traumacore #childhood trauma

[gloomyhours]

#wish my brain didn’t make me think about this #but moreso than that I wish my teachers didn’t traumatize me #:/ #depression #anxiety #adhd #autism #trauma #neurodivergent #neurodivergence #school trauma #adhd meme #autism meme #neurodivergent meme

[noballoonsinspace]

Just saw someone defend an abusive teacher by saying “pretty sure you wouldn’t get into teaching if you didn’t specifically care about children and want to help them” and while this may be true it is dangerously dismissive of the fact that many adults have quite frankly very fucked up ideas of what is helpful to children

#child advocacy #social responsibility #helping kids does not include punishing and reprimanding and disciplining and scolding!!!! btw #complex trauma #school trauma #childhood trauma #autistic trauma #parental trauma

[everything-i-long-to-do]

I fucking hate that every fucking conversation about PTSD from childhood trauma is completely dominated by people who were abused as children. OBVIOUSLY they have every right to be in the conversation but I never hear anyone talk about anything else.

And it’s always the parents too. It’s never teachers or other classmates of yours. Because only your parents abusing you is bad enough to cause you lifelong crippling trauma and self esteem issues.

I wish it wasn’t always about parental abuse. I wish people talked more about the long term traumas of your family being poor, and of the trauma of being autistic or mentally ill or the trauma of being chronically ill or even temporarily ill, the trauma of medical treatment, the trauma of near death experiences, the trauma of having phobias, the trauma of social pressures, the trauma of fucking everything else that ever traumatizes a kid.

Yes, abuse survivors belong in the conversation. Absolutely. But I don’t see people acknowledge enough the other survivors of traumatic circumstances.

I have felt so much pressure to scrutinize my parents parenting to explain why I’m so fucked up and I can’t. They were great parents. It’s the trauma I got from everyone else that was the problem. My teachers, mainly. The other students (yes, other children. Yes, bullying is traumatic and can be just as extremely traumatic as parental abuse). My psychiatrists and therapists.

And I can’t say any of them outright abused me either. People can traumatize you without abusing you, too.

And sometimes it’s not people. It’s the world. It’s being in pain. Just being in pain as a child is traumatic.

Actually, being a child period is traumatic because of how helpless you are to literally every adult ever because they have complete social and legal power over you and do not see you as as much of a human being as they are. Even if you are human like them, you’re still inferior because you’re dumb and weak and sensitive.

Ugh. I’ve felt so pressured to have some Freudian explanation of why I’m so fucked up and insecure, and it’s just not there. Some people are born mentally ill, Mary. Some people have fucking OCD.

I wish people talked about the trauma of school more. If they did, maybe there would be eye-opening studies about how much it messes you up, and how much trauma it causes people.

But because it’s a mandatory institution, and it’s 'normal', people won’t believe you. No one believed me no matter how much I told them that school was making me suicidal. No one cared.

#vent blog #trauma #childhood trauma #ocd #autism #bullying #school trauma

[puppyboycunt]

When you have autism, people think you operating at 110% is actually around 70-80%. The extra work you put in to look put together, proactive, confident, normal, is all for nothing. They still ask for more, actually, they expect more.

I wonder how much better my school experience could have been if I didn't have to work so hard? When an unusual proficiency with science couldn't make up for proper studying and learning techniques, my teacher called me "stupid" and "lazy". When I couldn't ever nail down an encyclopedic memory of my times tables, I was embarrassed in front of my peers for not being "smart" enough to remember them.

Adulthood didn't get easier, I just got used to constantly being tired.

Projects at work turned in early, getting orders filled fast, all it does is place an expectation on you for more, more, more. What do I do when I don't even have the energy to do the things I want?

We're not made for it.

#autism #autistic adult #autism thoughts #burnout #vent post #vent #academic trauma #school trauma

[handprintt]

i just want someone to gently hold me with a hand on the back of my head and tell me it’ll be ok

#actually traumatized #traumatized #emotional neglect #emotional abuse #trauma #childhood trauma #actually traumagenic #traumagenic system #traumagenic #school trauma

[moonshadow-thoughts]

Can we stop blaming people who were bullied for the bullying?!?!

When you were the one who was bullied, people always blame you. Somehow its always your fault. When you were quiet when you were bullied then you "should have spoken up about it", when you were scared when you were bullied then you "need to toughen up" when you got angry and defended yourself its also your fault because "you were just provoking them to bully you".

Can we stop blaming people who were bullied and finally start blaming the people who's fault it actually is! The people who bully, the people who witness the bullying but decide to look away, the people who support the bullies!

#bullying #getting bullied #school bullying #thoughts #my thoughts #introvert #introverted #trauma #post traumatic stress #school #isolated #childhood trauma #school trauma #mobbing #hate

[forget-the-feeling]

“Fuck being the bigger person”

Why was I supposed to be the mature one? Why was I expected to let others walk all over me?

#traumacore #ventcore #childhood trauma #angercore #school trauma #parental trauma

[milowithani]

I spent my childhood rushing to become an adult because I thought it would help me escape a dark place. Now I'm an adult, trying to catch up on the childhood I lost.

#childhood ptsd #childhood #childhood trauma #cptsd #complex ptsd #religious trauma #religious schooling #school bullying #school trauma #mental health #just cptsd things #living with cptsd #ptsd recovery #actually autistic #mental health relapse

[bunnighost]

#actuallytraumatized #traumacore #trauma vent #childhood trauma #trauma edit #bullying #school trauma

[bullied-and-traumatised]

The trust issues you develop when specifically interacting with people your age and younger after surviving childhood bullying is wild.

The way you assume that every person who comes up to you has bad intentions. The amount of anxiety you feel having to talk to anyone who looks young. Immediately assuming every negative comment a person makes is about you, even when they're not talking to you and you're never mentioned. Every laugh is laughing at you. Every person whose nice to you is just waiting for the punch line where you become the butt of some elaborate joke. Even positive comments you take as backhanded. Nice people are always secretly condescending.

If you're still in education, even after you leave the school it happened in, entering another academic institution brings those feelings straight to the front of your mind.

This sort of thing doesn't just go away when you leave the place it happened. It stays with you for a very long time, sometimes your entire life. Random tones, words and settings will trigger feelings of fear, alienation, dread and anger without you even knowing why.

And this is just the social, emotional and verbal bullying. Physical and sexual bullying are a whole other nasty beast. How do you even begin to unpack this?

#bullying #bullied #school bullying #school trauma #peer abuse #social anxiety #childhood trauma #trauma #complex ptsd #trauma recovery #ptsd recovery #actually traumatized

[bitter-and-angry]

It isn’t safe here! Please let me leave!!!

#actuallybullied #actuallyanxious #actuallymentallyill #actuallytraumatized #actuallyneurodivergent #trauma #mine #school trauma #peer abuse

[eye-of-enigmatic-thought]

They tried to push me down But I just wiggled around until they couldn't hold me Years and years, they couldn't hold me

More vent art with Crocrow, this time with a younger me as well. Based on one childhood trauma from when I was a young teen.

A uh, explanation under the cut plus resources if you are also someone suffering from abuse and want an escape, I swear I'm doing okay! This art is to just put old feelings to rest!

I can't remember my age (most likely an early teen) or the full details, but once when I was a teen, I was in the middle of a breakdown in class and was dissociating, and the teachers then didn't let me leave even after class and were constraining me, out of instinct, I bit down hard on her arm, unlike this artwork i didn't cause her to bleed, but I remember her afterwards saying that if I actually did break skin, she would've called the police on me. I remember then saying, in my dissociation, who I'm sure now was Crocrow back then, "I am proud, because I can hurt you."

That scared them good.

I don't entirely know why we said that to her, but if I had to guess... I've dealt with a lot of lack of control as a kid, I felt that I was often dragged into awful situations and I often didn't have the ability to fight back, so when at one point I did fight back, and managed to cause damage enough that a teacher, a authority figure that normally had all the power over me, was scared of me enough to threaten the coppers at me, I could only feel pride, because now there was less control over me, now I knew that I could fight back, and that if anyone wanted to hurt me, they'd get consequences for it.

Uh, whew, sad kid Tara momence amirite KJKJDSHKSDHKSD

But anyway, one final thing I want to say, if you are in a situation of abuse, whether it be under parents, school, in work, or so on, one where you have no control over, I want to tell you there is a way out of them, you won't deal with it forever and happiness is always in reach. Hell, you don't actually have to bite people's arms to necessarily fight back, sometimes just living, and finding ways to make yourself happy is the bravest and most powerful thing you can do.

Because when under all the pain that abusers give or have given you, and you choose to keep surviving, it shows that despite everything, they don't control you, because you are a survivor.

Have some resources to help you if you need them, I will add more if asked, please feel free to send me!!:

www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/abuse/

www.domesticshelters.org

www.bacaworld.org

www.helpguide.org/find-help.htm

www.unicef.org/child-protection

#my art #oc #digital art #krita #crocrow #plural #plurality #childhood trauma #vent art #trauma art #trauma #collage #digital collage #digital painting #child abuse tw #school trauma #blood #violence #school #avian #black dresses #wasteisolation #wiggle

[traumamagpie]

You're always told where to be and when to be there. You're told what you're going to do and with whom. You have to ask if you're allowed to pee, can only eat and drink when allowed, only enjoy the media allowed by those above you. You're constantly punished for not living up to their standards. You're left hungry and exhausted with absolutely no remorse. There's no escaping the punishments. There's never an escape.

And they still try to tell me it's not traumatic.

#magpie screams into the night #school trauma #post traumatic stress #actually traumatized #neurodivergent #neurodivercity