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fullmetalgirl98 · 1 year

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Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...

Hi! First of all, thank you for asking me this question, I'm really glad! ^^ (and no, no one had ever asked me this before ahah).

So....mhm...I have to say it's really HARD to choose, because I'm into a lot, really, A LOT, of stuff lol. But I'll try to choose among the riffraff the most iconic ones... despite that, I think it's really impossible for me to rank from 1 to 10 in the ascending (or descending) sense of the term, so please don't consider the characters I'm going to list as places within a ranking ahaha 🙊

Xerxes Break (Pandora Hearts, manga by Jun Mochizuki): Break is a wonderful character. His attitudes may make him seem like a superficial, clownish person, but he’s actually an extremely troubled man with very solid moral values, ready to do anything for those he loves. Break is a character I really can't help but love, I won't go more into his analysis because I want to avoid spoilers, but he’s such a troubled and controversial character, I really love him with all my heart. He needs to be protected adjkhgal.

Vanitas (Vanitas no Carte, manga by Jun Mochizuki): as I said for Break, Vanitas is also an extremely controversial character. Sarcastic, witty, extremely sensual, and defiant, he apparently gives the impression that he’s the kind of person who only exploits others for his own purposes, but this is actually not the case. Vanitas has suffered so much in the past, he creates on purpose a wall around himself to avoid making connections that could hurt him again someday, or hurt those around him. He’s more aware of what is happening around him than he wants to give it away.

Dice Arisugawa (Hypnosis Mic, multimedia project): I LOVE Dice. There’s a reason why he’s my favorite character in the Hm universe lol. He's that kind of person who's silly and funny, but would do ANYTHING for the sake of the people he loves. Loyal and sincere, he loves to take risks (way too much, I’d say) but he can also be serious and reliable if the situation calls for it. In addition, his rapping skills are SUBLIME.

Toma Hikage (Paradox Live, multimedia project): Toma is a character who has very recently entered my heart. Initially I thought he was the typical vain pretty boy, but I found out quite soon that there's actually a very deep motivation behind this such a seemingly frivolous behavior. Toma is a person with a heart of gold, ready to do anything to support the other members of VISTY. Also, I can't help but love that so special way he accentuates sentences ahaha. Also I love his voice in the songs, it's really pure and melodic! **

Rin Matsuoka (Free!, anime): Rin is cool and has style, no doubt about this. But beyond physical appearance, he's a guy who knows what he wants, fights and works hard till the end to achieve his goals. You can always rely on him. If you need help, you can be sure that Rin will be there for you to help, always. Despite the big muscle mass, Rin is a big softie and does not hesitate to dissolve into tears quite easily too, he is adorable ahah

Tsurugi Kamiya (Servamp, manga by Tanaka Strike): I have to admit that I couldn't stand Tsurugi at first, but the deeper I got into his story, the more I fell in love with him. Tsurugi made me cry more than once while reading. He comes across as a very strong character, but internally he's an extremely fragile person. I want to hug him ;^;

Gojo Satoru (Jujutsu Kaisen, by Gege Akutami): you can't help but love Gojo: I won't dwell on his physical appearance (as his charm is there for all to see), Gojo is a man who is apparently very superficial, with a very sharp tongue and always with a ready wit, but again this is only a facade: Gojo is extremely witty, as well as being damn strong. Everyone relies on him. Never make Gojo angry.

Osamu Dazai (Bungo Stray Dogs, manga by Kafka Asagiri & Sango Harukawa): what I've already said about Gojo applies somewhat to Dazai. It's impossible not to love Dazai. He's the perfect combination of seriousness and deficiency, if you need to break the heaviness of the moment, count on Dazai. If you need reinforcement, count on Dazai. If you need someone to properly blow up your nerves, count on Dazai.

Percy Jackson (Percy Jackson & The Olympians, book series by Rick Riordan): most of my peers grew up with Harry Potter. Well, I grew up with Percy. Thanks to him, over the course of many years and MANY books, I’ve been able to immerse myself in a wonderful world, a world, that of Greek mythology, which has always fascinated me so much. I really owe a lot to Percy.

Ophelia (The Mirror Visitor, book series by Christelle Dabos): Ophelia is also a recent addition. I finished reading the second book of the series just yesterday and I must say that I haven't met such a valid character for a long time. Ophelia is that kind of girl that, at first glance, you wouldn't value at all: scruffy, petite, "anonymous". In reality, she's a girl who really goes through all sorts of things, both to assert herself and to protect those she loves. Although fragile, contrary to what everyone might think, she's endowed with an iron will, a strong personality and also great courage, but it's not a snooty courage, as often happens to be seen in fictional characters, but it's a courage that she was forced to build, sometimes even against her own instincts to run away. I really admire her for that.

So... If it wasn't clear, I like very controversial and complicated characters LOL

I hope you found my answers somewhat interesting and thanks again for asking! ^^

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greensaplinggrace · 3 years

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honestly THANK YOU for saying all that abt baghra bc i thought i was going crazy from not liking her??? bc i haven't read the books and only summaries of them on wiki and like. i dunno why ppl like her actually even in the show bc this guy, her son, is like "i wanna make the world better for us grisha" and she's just like "no." even tho he sees that she's MAKING HERSELF SICK from suppressing her powers! she's literally like in bed coughing in the flashback yet seem much healthier at the little palace. also like after everything, after her disapproval, after the fold, after centuries of waiting for the sun summoner.. he never abandons her. he makes sure she's cares for. he doesn't harm her. and i have to wonder if baghra has ever thanks him for that, for just not leaving her alone. like i dunno how im suppose ro believe aleks is a heartless villain when he still cares for his abusive mom like this. like has baghra even told her she loved him (honestly she reminds me of a classic emotionally unavailable asian parent but maybe that's just me). also im wondering if baghra ever told aleks that he had an aunt.. bc like.. now that u bring up her isolating him it's like hmmmm...

not at me being like alina... why do u trust the bitter old woman who literally beats u with a stick and verbally abuses u every chance she gets.. just bc she showed a bad painting... like.. pls use two braincells to see that who u figured out as his mother... is also using his protection..

like baghra could've upped and left with alina. but no. she stayed bc she knew she was safe under aleks's protection.

alsoim just impressed that after his first friend tried to drown him and harvest his bones... he didn't go into hiding???? he still wanted to make a safe heaven for grisha!!! HE STILL WANTED TO PROTECT GRISHA EVEN AFTER HIS GRISHA FRIEND TRIED TO KILL HIM FOR HIS FUCKEN BONES. like... this is the guy im suppose to believe is the villain???

honestly i feel like part of the reason why LB's plotlines seem so bad and disconnected (and sometimes outright racist but that's another rant) and why darkles is disproportionately more violent and villainous in the later books is bc she didn't expect the darkling to be so popular and wanted to stick with her guns of making him the villain. but also wanted the money from aleks's popularity. but like you can't have ur cake and eat it too.

Well thank you for sending this ask! It's very sweet and very passionate. I'm glad you liked my post! I didn't put as much thought into it as some of my others lol. I kind of just talked. But it was nice to be able to finally talk about some of the problems I have with both her character and the fandom/author's perception of her.

HERE is the post this is referring to, in case anyone's wondering.

👀👀 You've hit the nail on the head for so many things, here!

Baghra is extremely emotionally unavailable, basically to the point of neglect. She's also verbally and physically abusive, traits which I doubt were only reserved for her students and not her son. Baghra claims she would do anything to protect him, but I've known a lot of parents who have that mindset and yet still harm their children because they think it's "good for them".

Aleksander stays at Baghra's side for years, and even when they're opposing each other she's never too far away from him. Idk if you've read the books but he does eventually hurt her. And as much as I don't like Baghra, I think his actions were horrid. But I'm also honestly kind of surprised it took him so long lmao.

Yeah I mean, in terms of isolation, let's not forget that she never wanted to introduce him to his father, either. Baghra's sense of eternity clouds a lot of her judgments on relationships, which means she views most people as dust and therefore teaches her son to as well. The problem with that is that he's a growing child, and he needs those social and emotional attachments for healthy development.

I would bet quite a bit of money that Baghra has either never told him she loves him or she has told him so few times it's practically forgettable.

And everything becomes more complicated because so many of Baghra's actions are understandable because of her life and her history, but the impacts they have on the people around her, especially Aleksander, are permanently damaging. And the fact that that's never gone over in critical depth in the books or how it's glossed over in fandom is just very disconcerting. Like, acknowledging Baghra's failings doesn't mean we're excusing Aleksander's actions, it just means we're holding Baghra liable for her own. Which the fandom should be doing, considering she's the epitome of an abusive parental figure.

And Alina trusting Baghra over Aleksander is even more confusing! Especially in the show!! This is the woman who beat her and abused her and tortured her friends when they tiny little children (and who probably still does so now that they're adults). This is the woman who mocks you and harasses you and insults you on a regular basis. Why does Baghra revealing she's Aleksander's mother make Alina change her mind?! Like fuck, I'd just feel bad for Aleksander. No wonder he kept it a secret, I would too! And that painting is enough evidence?! Really?! A random painting shown to you by this abusive mentor that's been making your life hell. That's what you're going to betray your new lover over?

The friends trying to harvest his bones thing is a good point, too. I think Aleksander, especially show Aleksander, is incredibly idealistic. I think he cares too much for others - those he's deemed worth his care (a sentiment given to him by Baghra). Despite everything she's tried to teach him about hiding and abandoning others and never caring and never doing anything to help or reach out or connect with people, Aleksander still continues to do so. It's likely because he never got it from Baghra growing up, and so is desperate for those emotional needs to be fulfilled elsewhere.

His turning point, when Baghra tells him it was understandable that those kids tried to kill him because the world is such a hard place for them - that's crucial. And the reason it's possible as a motivating factor is because of that idealism and that desire to help and that desire to be everything his mother isn't. Baghra tells him this trauma he just experienced was because of the oppression of his people, and instead of following her lead and accepting that, going into hiding and abandoning everybody to their misery, he goes I can do something about that. I can make it so this never happens again. Which is usually how trauma like that combines with one's core personality traits at a young age, especially when there's none of the essential support systems in place to aid in recovery (ie, the role Baghra should have been filling but wasn't, because she decided to exacerbate the problem instead).

And yeah, one of my biggest problems with the ham-fisted "beating you over the head with a sledgehammer of evil deeds" look-how-bad-this-character-is! portrayal of the Darkling in the later books comes from the impression I get that Bardugo doesn't trust her readers. She's so desperate to have us hate this character and think him an irredeemable villain, not trusting any of her readers to engage critically with a morally gray character, that it feels quite a bit like condescending fucking bullshit. Which ew, I know how to engage with literature, thanks.

She really does seem to look down on a large part of her fandom, and imo, the infantilization of the female characters in her books seems to carry over to her impression of most of her female readers as well. Which is why the Darkling's character arc gets fucking destroyed. But he's still a good cash grab, of course, so she'll shake his dead corpse in front of the fandom for money every time she wants something from it.

Also! Another reason I think her plotlines feel disconnected (I'm sorry Bardugo I respect you as a person, but shit-) is because the writing in SaB is just bad. I mean, nevermind the absolutely nauseating implications of the way she portrays the Grisha as a persecuted group who's situation is never actually fully addressed as it should be, considering Grisha rights is what her main villain is fighting for (imo for a series called the Grishaverse, LB seems to be pretty anti Grisha), but her characters and story alone are just wrong for each other. They don't fit together.

And the ending is one of the main pieces of evidence in that regard! You can’t say the ending where Alina isn’t Grisha anymore is her “going back to where she started” when she’s always been Grisha. She just didn’t know she was Grisha because she denied that part of herself that she was born with.

Alina is reluctant to move forward or change, she struggles with adapting, and she’s very set on the things she’s grown attached to throughout her life. She also has some latent prejudices against the Grisha, and so denies the possibility of being Grisha for those reasons as well.

Alina’s lack of powers in the beginning of her life because she willfully doesn’t learn about them to avoid change versus her lack of powers at the end of the book when she’s accepted them and then they’re stripped away from her by outer forces are two entirely separate circumstances. You can’t make a parallel about lost powers and lack of Grisha status bringing her back to the start when she was always Grisha and she always had powers and she simply refused to come to terms with it because of personal reasons.

The first situation is an internal conflict that indicates a story about growth and a journey of self acceptance. Denying herself the opportunity to learn about her heritage and to find acceptance with a group of people like her because she’s tied to the past and because of the way she was raised is the setup for a narrative that tackles unlearning prejudice and learning how to connect with a part of her identity that was denied her and learning how to grow independent and self assured. It’s the setup for a different story entirely. The second situation is an external conflict that centers around the ‘corrupting influence of power’... for some reason.

In a world where Grisha do not have social, political, or economic power and they are hunted, centering your heroine’s journey of self acceptance and growth around an external conflict about... the corrupting influence of power (in a group of people that don’t actually have any power?!) just doesn’t work. It is literally impossible to connect the two stories Bardugo is trying to push in Shadow and Bone without seriously damaging the main character’s developmental arc.

The only way a narrative like this would work, claiming that she has gone back to where she started, is either a) if the Grisha weren’t actually a persecuted group and instead were apart of the upper class, or b) if the one bad connection between the two instances is acknowledged - that Alina denied a part of herself crucial to self acceptance and growing up, and that losing her powers at the end has also denied her. It is a tragedy, not a happy ending.

Alina suffered because she didn’t use her powers. She grew sick. It was bad for her. This was not a resistance to 'the corruption of power and the burden of greed', it was her suffering because she couldn’t fully accept herself.

Framing the ending as a return to the beginning can’t be done if you don’t address how bad the beginning was for your main character. You brought her back to a bad point in her life. You regressed her. This should be a low point in her arc. It should be a problem that’s solved so she can finish developing organically or it should be something that is acknowledged as a tragedy in it’s own right, for the future the world (the writing) denied her.

This is a ramble and it makes no sense and I’m really sorry, but my point is that Bardugo put the wrong characters in the wrong story. The character arc required for organic development doesn’t match the story and intended message at all. The narrative doesn’t fit the cast. She's got two clashing stories attempting to work in tandem and she ends up with both conflicting messages that fans still can’t comprehend in her writing and an ending that doesn’t suit her main character to such an impossible degree that it’s almost laughable.

So yeah, there's a few reasons why I think the story and the plot feels so bad and disconnected. I hope you don't mind me making this answer so long! 😅 I was not expecting to write this much.

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vs-redemption · 3 years

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This was part 2 of request but for separate. I promised I’d throw in Bakugou so can we imagine our Firecracker x reader who’s quirk is like Wonder Woman??? (Don’t ask me why’ve I’ve been stuck on marvel/dc x mha lately! Lol)

~🐱❤️

From Cindy: Thank you for the request 🐱! I decided to stick with just wonder woman’s natural abilities. She’s already so powerful even without the whip and bracelets. When I was looking up her abilities I was shocked. I had no idea she was almost as powerful as Superman. Wow! I wouldn’t want to mess with her. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

Wonder Duo (Bakugo x Fem!Reader with a Wonder Woman quirk)

It hadn’t even taken you a single month after getting your hero license to make it onto the international news for single handedly taking down some insanely strong villain along with their entire group of underlings. Even before you’d graduated from your high school hero course, agencies from around the globe had been clambering over each other to try and recruit you, willing to pay almost any price to have the peace of mind you’d bring knowing you’d protect them and their homeland. And with a quirk like yours, it was no surprise that you were in such high demand. Unparalleled strength, flight, and superhuman speed were just a few of the abilities you possessed that had caused fans to emerge from all walks of life to support you. Everyone seemed to eat up any scrap of media attention you appeared in hungrily, except for one particular guy named Katsuki Bakugo.

The hero known as Dynamight endured your existence with a growing resentment. Despite never having met you, he still hated the fact that you were hogging the spotlight. You were gaining popularity faster than what seemed possible, and soon enough you’d even overtaken his spot at the top of the Billboard charts too. Over the years, he’d accepted that he’d have to compete with his old classmates to be the number one hero in the country, but to him you were just some random extra that had come out of nowhere. To say that he was unhappy was an understatement.

“What do you mean she’s coming here?!” He had half a mind to blast his PR manager into next week for even suggesting to invite you to his agency. “I never consented to that! What the hell?!”

“A team up with her is going to give your own ratings a huge boost, sir.” The poor employee reasons. “The public loves her, and you’re one of the only pro heroes she’s even agreed to collaborate with. On top of that, it would be rude to retract our offer now.”

“I can boost my own ratings,” Bakugo growls as he stomps around the office, palms crackling with mini explosions. “It’s not like she knows this area anyway, so she’ll probably just get in my way!”

On the fated day of your introduction with Bakugo, the meeting did not go anything like either of you had planned. It was no secret that Bakugo was competitive, but the last thing you had expected the moment you saw him was for him to issue a challenge without so much as a ‘Hello.’ And the last thing he’d expected was for you to calmly accept without blinking an eye. He wasn’t stupid. He knew you’d be able to beat him in both speed and strength, but he couldn’t stop himself from at least trying. He had to know the difference in your abilities so he’d be able to find a way to reduce the gap somehow.

Nobody was going to try to stop either of you when you both were obviously hell bent on seeing how far you could push each other, and it would’ve blown their minds if they knew Bakugo had developed a little crush on you within the first couple hours of sparring. Sure, you were better than him at a lot of things, but not all. Not everything could be accomplished with brute force, and Bakugo was a quick strategist, He was already thinking of ways to capitalize on your strong points and work them into his own fighting style. He was surprised when you asked him for any advice or tips he might have after you’d sufficiently worn each other out, and it made him like you even more that you respected his opinion despite the obvious advantages you had over him.

“So, how long are you staying?” He asks you at the end of the day, hoping it wasn’t obvious that he was already calculating you into his future plans.

It only took a few simple patrols for you both to put complete trust in one another. Bakugo never doubted that you’d have his back, even if he rushed into a situation without giving you any sort of warning. And you were the opposite, remembering to hold yourself back just in case Bakugo had noticed or thought of something you hadn’t. By the end of your time at his agency, the crime rate in the city and surrounding areas had decreased drastically. Nobody wanted to risk having to deal with the two of you.

“Go kick some ass!” Bakugo grins at you when it’s time for you to leave. “And you better not make me wait too long before coming back.” He hated to let you go, but there were other places that desperately needed you. And while he used to complain every time your face popped up on the TV or in a magazine, now he just bragged about how many kilometers per hour you could fly or how he’d seen you lift a 60,000 pound semi-truck over your head with one hand. In interviews, you both had nothing but positive things to say about each other and the admiration between the two of you was obvious.

Whenever possible, you both met up to spar again to make sure the other person hadn’t been slacking off with their training. Bakugo loved how you kept him motivated and pushed him to improve, and you loved the challenge of trying to figure out what tricks he had up his sleeve and attempting to outsmart him. Neither of you could deny the intense chemistry you had and soon Bakugo was asking you to be his. He had never dreamed he’d end up with someone stronger than him, but he still considered himself the winner just by being the one to have you at his side. You, on the other hand, were just happy to have found a partner that wasn’t intimidated by your power and that treated you like an equal. Once the news of your relationship got out, you both went from being the top two heroes in the nation to the number one power couple in the world practically overnight.

#Katsuki Bakugo x Reader #Bakugo x Reader #Bnha x reader #mha x reader #Katsuki Bakugo #bnha #mha #Cindy's Writing #🐱 anon

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wanderingchocolateeclair · 3 years

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How about how the top five kinda acts like a family? I’ve kinda seen them as such and noticed one of your previous drawing was like that. What little things do they appreciate about each other? Or tiny things they do for each other.

Ahhh! Thank you for providing me with something to ramble about!

Honestly I just think that they would just get up to some really troublesome stuff together, whilst still doing an amazing job at being heroes. I’ll write some random headcanons about them in a moment but I think I’ll just give like some little points about the others from each of their own perspectives first? (None of this is in a particular order by the way)

Endeavour -

Well he’s.....himself?? Believes that the other four are just annoying “kids” that pester him for no reason, doesn’t enjoy their pranks and mischievous antics however always manages to get roped into them (most of the time by Hawks and Miruko)

To him, Miruko and Hawks are the annoying kids who always manage to challenge him into doing stupid things, Jeanist is the bothersome pest who has a really annoying way of turning whatever he says into a cheeky insult whilst still managing to have more common sense than the other two, and Edgeshot is just that really mysterious guy that he’s slightly wary of yet can tolerate more than the others because he can be kinda scary sometimes.

Despite this he does recognise that all of them are incredibly strong individuals who all really do take their jobs as heroes rather seriously.

Hawks -

Oh boy he loves pestering Endeavour. Miruko is the only one who will straight up join him in doing so, closely followed by the useless “supervision” of Edgeshot and Jeanist.

Obviously he really looks up to Endeavour and that’s kinda obvious, Miruko is the “fun one” in his own words as they make the most chaotic duo out of the whole of them, and actually he sees the other two as two kinda fatherly figures in a way, being two people that he’s probably known from a young age and he knows they’ll give him serious advice when he needs it - although most of the time he’ll just say that “they suck the fun out of everything”.

On the other side of things though, he does know that if he ever has an issue that he’s unsure of how to handle, or he’s feeling bad about something, he can go to any of them to ask for advice, talk or even just a hug. Because they understand.

Miruko -

Ah yes. She will never pass up an opportunity to pester one of the older heroes with Hawks. It’s way too much fun.

In her eyes, Endeavour is just a competitive fiery flamethrower who will sometimes actually say something that makes sense, Hawks is the one she can do anything stupid with who occasionally supplies her with new challenges, she finds Jeanist a little annoying in the way he words things but knows that he’s always willing to join her in sassing the hell out of Endeavor, and she will not hesitate to tease Edgeshot about whatever she can - probably the only one out of the lot of them that isn’t at all fazed by his death glare.

She sees them all as a group of chaotic adults that will happily provide her with whatever support she needs in return for her keeping an eye out for them whenever she can.

Jeanist -

He really enjoys making whatever cheeky remarks he can to annoy Endeavour. But does know when not to tag along with the other two in some of their more stupid ideas. And will no doubt comment about one of their choices in clothing about two times a day at least.

He sees Endeavour as a cranky old man who needs to lighten his temper and his manners quite a bit but does hold respect in the fact that he is older and still a very powerful hero, Hawks is basically “his child” and he knows that despite how childish he may be at times he still does know how to make his own fairly reasonable desicions, he acknowledges how strong Miruko is and is kinda terrified about getting on her bad side - but still knows she comes up with some stupid ideas with Hawks and joins in with them for the fun of it, and well Edgeshot is the only one who he’ll listen to when it comes to doing anything stupid because that man can be really scary when he wants to be.

But really he knows that each and every one of them will be there for him to lean on as a support on those days where he needs it, and he’ll always provide help for any of them when they need it.

Edgeshot -

He has to babysit 4 grown adults...but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t actually enjoy the chaos. Occasionally he’ll help out with the stupid ideas, but only when he knows it isn’t a dangerous idea. Most of the time he’ll just stand by watching it happen.

From his point of view, Endeavor is a strong hero that acts like stroppy child with bad manners most of the time but he never really tries to do anything to annoy the older man - that’s the others’ job, Hawks and Miruko are the troublesome kids who always manage to come up with ideas that are so stupid yet something that he actually really wants to know the outcome of, and Jeanist is a man of many talents but incredibly unable to keep any of his secretly stupid ideas hidden from him (and he is the only person out of the lot of them that somehow actually find Jeanist’s stupid puns funny - he won’t admit it though).

Aside from all this, he is very aware that these people will stand with him to protect whatever they must, he trusts these people with his life as he hopes they would do the same in return.

Some random headcanons:

They will have regular meet-ups outside of work at one of their agencies where they just chill out and chat. These are usually at rather random times of day.

These meet-ups usually consist of hours of Hawks and Miruko doing something very stupid and Edge preventing Jeanist from winding endeavour up to the point that the building burns down.

Sometimes, it’ll end up just being a whole day where they catch up on all the sleep they’ve missed and end up basically having a massive slumber party in the middle of their office. Until one of them notices the time and they have to dart off to their individual patrols.

Jeanist has somehow managed to persuade endeavour to let him do his hair...twice, and Edgeshot has it all on camera.

This led to a series of makeover sessions where Hawks and Jeanist made Endeavour wear neon yellow eyeliner, Miruko suddenly had pink hair and Edgeshot spent the whole day in pigtails (much to his dismay)

They treat Hawks as the baby - literally will do anything for him - but tease him with stuff like “oh it’s way past your bedtime Hawks” or “sorry Hawks you’re too young to do that well tell you when you’re older” and he HATES it.

They all gather gossip from their interns and sidekicks over the week and end up having competitions to see who has the most shocking news.

So far Edgeshot and Jeanist are tied with first place.

They are also completely fine with showing the other 3 their faces so they are fully aware of how they look like.

Most of the time these meet-ups will be fairly chaotic and cheerful, but on the occasion it may not be.

Being a hero comes with the knowledge that you cannot save everybody. And they all know this. And so when these moments happen and they feel as if they need a break, these are the best times for them to come to terms with what happened on maybe a patrol that evening, or a mission that didn’t end well.

Because they understand each other completely, and know what that feeling is like.

These meet-ups normally just consist of a lot of silent discussions, hugs and often tears.

Where they all get together to comfort the one who needs it the most. Putting their plans on hold for them and listening to their troubles.

Because even Endeavour would feel bad refusing to console a Jeanist who was distraught over being “too weak” to save a single person who was in a completely different location than himself.

Or a timid Edgeshot who’s past was hovering over his mind more than usual, preventing him from focusing properly on his evening patrol.

Or a gloomy Hawks who feels as if his decisions are always wrong and feels like he can’t do anything right.

Or even a stressed out Miruko who feels as though she did a bad job at saving someone just because they were disrespectful towards her “careless” methods.

And of course they all are aware of the heavy expectations of being number 1, and know that truly this unusually silent Endeavour is human just like themselves and will feel just as anyone else would.

Even top heroes need to have these moments where they can break down in front of the people they trust, in order to keep their own sanity from crumbling apart.

And really that’s what they all collectively like the most about their little “family”.

Between all the fun and chaos.

It’s the ability for them all to lean on each other at times when they need it the most, and they definitely feel that’s a good thing.

Wooh!! There you go! A nice long list of headcanons of my favourite lil group of chaotic characters.

Sorry for getting a little sad at the end there, but if you know me by now I’m pretty sure it’s obvious that a ramble written by me wouldn’t be complete without it lol

Thanks again for the ask @ohpleaseiwillendyou it really gave me some happy things to think about and really cheered me up, which is exactly what I needed right now aha.

Please feel free to send me asks or suggestions to write about! I’m currently quite motivation-less and I really need things to ramble about to make me feel better :)

~Eclair

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stray-tori · 3 years

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TPN S02E04 - Initial Thoughts (anime-only)

viewing + post-ep talk with my friends: Google Drive (sorry, youtube denied me again)

(i) Translations are in the English (USA) CC (including the english bits as well for those who struggle with the audio/language, etc.)

pls validate my efforts and watch it.

there’s some anime-only talk about the adaptation towards the end, I wasn’t trying to be arrogant, just mention it to my friends based on some things I’d heard and without spoiling them about what is different that I do know of specifically. But if you want to avoid that, feel free to!

I definitely said it a bit too in favor of the anime, and obviously my friends’ just got my simplified thoughts on it? Like when they said it makes sense for the anime to move on quicker, but that’s not really what’s different.

So yeah, please forgive the dubious things in that segment, I really just didn’t think about my words a lot.

. Random thoughts

The fish bug scenes were delightful TvT Also the animation during them trying to grab them???

The OST during Isabella’s scenes???? take me

I think we also heard the OST sneak peak from a while ago during the cave confrontation with the army force human

Don is a useless nightwatch, goddamn it Don

Don is an epic chairman.

Loved the shot of Ray shooting at the big demon (why didn’t Emma get a cool shot? :THONK:), very dynamic, very epic.

Also them running together to push the man off the cliff was... something haha.

I’m losing my mind that we’re actually just ending on the way ep1 started. Same animation loops too, eh. to be expected, and obviously adjusted for different clothing and items but. still as someone who wants to praise for not re-using animation, rip.

EMMA HAVING SLEEPING CHILDREN AROUND HER AWWWW

Eyy Ray took a bath with the others too, yay

. The bunker

So, the twist was that there was really.... no twist at all. Minerva was a good guy, he tried his best, he got discovered and chased.

And yet, I don’t think the bunker was previously discovered by the farms, which would at least warrant a “scare” like that, effectively making it a trap. They may have been aware of a shelter’s existence, but I don’t think they’ve been there before.

You could probably assume that the Troup that attacked our characters may have also removed the previous escapees from the scene --- but if that was the case, why leave all of the letters and other things in place. Not getting there immediately is understandable, they seem to arrived by foot (what? do you plan to keep an eye on the children the whole like 5 day march back or however long it took?? dang). So that’s not it.

So: what caused the HELPs? the person writing in the book seems to have been abandoned or more likely, are the only survivor of their group (maybe the only person in the group at all). Now it’d be an option for them to have found this safe haven and decided to just spend their days there, slowly losing their minds and doing the things on the wall. But then the message in the book, on the other hand, seems traumatized and sad, but not as lost as the carvings on the wall.

So either, they calmed down after going crazy and then once they did, they decided to leave.

Or it’s from two different people (or multiple), the one after the “HELP” one probably leaving the uplifting message in the book nearby of the scribbles.

I’m not sure which I’d find more likely, but all in all, I’m not sure why they didn’t just have the demons already know of the place and just have the letter (they probably wouldn’t have searched everything in the place) not be as obviously placed and then boom, they could still have made all discoveries they needed and when they found the help wall, it would have been from children trapped in the room while the men searched the bunker, wanting help.

* Clearly that’s not what they were going for, since there’s also day-counting things, but even that you could have explained by saying, they missed a child and the other escapees convinced them that they died, somehow and so they were left behind, traumatized by their friends being taken back and giving up for a while. It still runs into the same “but how can it be the same person?” doubt that my friend brought up, but I think that it’d justify the shock value of the wall more. Still not really making the whole “HELP” thing add up though, since that just sounds like there’s an immediate threat, when there isn’t. The only other thing I can think of is that the entire wall wasn’t one instance, so the counting could be solitude, the HELPs acute danger and the names probably also solitude. The drawing on the right also makes me think it was probably a child as well, fairly young. Poor kid.

Unless there’s something more to it I feel like it makes a little more sense, but still not a lot (WHY’D YOU LEAVE YOUR SNACKS, BRO) but seeing as we’ve left, I don’t think we’ll get to know.

I’m assuming the way the farm knew now is either a) they were aware but didn’t see any reason to go there unless there were children there, b) they saw the coordinate carvings (thanks Ray) or c) the pursuers contacted the farms (which would make sense, and again, thanks Ray).

.. the farm has a military force???

I also find it kind of funny that the farms have a military force??? Because so far, we’ve never seen them use guns to do anything. Which makes me think they might not be farm-intern but from an outside force, maybe the humans who are more “on-level” with them?

Like, what do they do all day. They’re probably not part of the buff demon guards and.... idk man haha-

. Isabella

Ahh I was happy to see her! I was even happier to be like “hah, prison. Knew it.” and then later reacting to the offer, even though that wasn’t exactly what I called, but damn. the pride. my fucking expression too lol, i couldn’t hide it at all pff.

Her jump in motivation is a little weird, but I do see it as, someone who has basically accepted their fate, and when that gets challenged, the will to live takes over.

I’m also not quite sure how she’s supposed to capture them if she can’t leave?

And then of course there’s whatever they promised her aside from “freedom” (which, if that just means being let outside, good luck ma’am there’s demons everywhere) - or is the transportation to the human world included? :D

Based on her clothing in the OP, I might have guessed it’d be “become a grandma” but that doesn’t really go well with the promise of freedom so.... I don’t know where that entire thing is going pff-

We don’t know a lot about what drives Isabella but one of the few things we do know is a) will to live and b) Leslie (????), hence the lullaby in “stressful” situations.

She already got the will to live with the baseline deal, so the only thing I can think of that would make her react more than freedom would be that Leslie’s alive and she can see him if she helps.

I’m not sure if she’s interested in anything else, like how the world works or what she can do for anyone, like.... hm. Of course it could totally be something that we just don’t know yet but yeah I guess that’s my guess.

They probably won’t give up Ray and seeing as she’s more concerned about his brain than anything, I don’t think even if they did allow her to take him with her, it probably wouldn’t mean a lot to her. Plus, why lose another high quality cattle.

I guess it could be, she did seem she wanted to be a proper mother figure, but idk something tells me it’s probably not something like that.

It would also be more “???” than “OHHH” of an reveal. Then again, Leslie is also an obvious choice so.

Maybe it’s something entirely new, we’ll see :D

. The possibily wrong date

So when Anna writes a journal thingy, we see this

And, well, their escape happened in January 2046, so... for that to be true, somewhere along the line, an entire year would have had to pass.

I’m assume this is a production error because

they didn’t get to harvest once

they wouldn’t wait a year to talk about the plan to go back

Ray wouldn’t need an ear patch for so long, he only has a cut

the montage only showed 22nd and 23rd, if an entire year had passed, we’d have been shown more varied dates, etc.

then it makes even less sense for why the army shows up one year later out of nowhere :D

...

Smh, CloverWorks, what can you even do right.

Yee, thanks for reading!

#tpn anime #tpn s2 #tpn anime-only #tpn isabella #tpn anime spoilers #tpn #tori has opinions #tori talks

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clearturtletrash · 3 years

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Horikoshi’s writing of Shouto and the problems I have with it

If you’re a fan of the way Shouto’s treated in the manga, don’t read, we’ll end up disagreeing on everything and you’ll probably end up offended lol. Because I’m not (satisfied, that is).

This post is spoiler-heavy for anime onlys, and for manga readers not up to date with the last arc (and last chapter for that matter, which is 301).

So, about Shouto and how he’s handled, along with ‘his’ story.

I don’t get how Horikoshi, whose writing I respect immensely, managed to depict such an incredible and alluring storyline with the Todoroki family, with some of the most complex character writing I’ve seen, but fumbled the one character he had to actually focus on.

Literally more than half the people in the Todoroki storyline are more interesting and more developed than Shouto at this point. Hawks, Endeavour, Dabi, Rei… a good bunch of fans are way more invested in their story than his, and I am too. It’s really sad, because if you asked me two years ago Shouto would have probably been one of my favorite character. But he was completely shafted, given no internal conflict, and at this point, I have the same interest in him as I do for Fuyumi and Natsuo, which basically means his only interesting feature to me is that he’s Endeavour’s child (oh, and he does have a cool design, but that can only get you so far).

Deku and Katsuki are more popular than him by a landslide compared to before if we believe the Japanese popularity polls, because Hori actually bothers to give them focus, conflict, and cool moments (even though, sometimes I feel like Horikoshi forgets Deku’s his main character lol). It’s a testament to how great Shouto was and how much potential had that he’s still that popular despite everything. Because, let’s be real, Endeavour and Dabi have taken the focus because they have much more emotional energy, while Shouto is just stuck in the crossfire, as a punching ball and stress relief (and eventually as the person who’ll save him I guess) for Touya (see how he was relegated to first aid during the big fight against Tomura? how he did absolutely nothing against Touya who was burning him alive? And how Touya had no interest in Shouto outside of the fact he was Endeavour’s son? Story of the way Hori treats him). He has no particular interesting insight to give on the Todoroki family either as he was too small to remember the important events, so even on this point we can’t count on Horikoshi to write something for him, everything comes from Fuyumi, Natsuo, and Rei. He's really had one great moment in S2 and S3 and that’s it. The way Horikoshi struggles to give him a personality doesn’t help either (he admitted some time ago he was hard to write sometimes, and… yeah, I can see that). I’m really trying to like his character but the manga gives us nothing, and keeps developing Endeavour, Dabi, and Hawks, which is great (I really love all three of them) but makes no sense given who’s supposed to be the main focus.

In the Endeavour agency arc, Endeavour’s thoughts and struggles were heavily touched upon, and Bakugou and Deku are in sync for 90% of it while Shouto’s just… there. as fodder for Endeavour, and maybe as a link between Endeavour and Bakugou/Deku too. He’s supposed to be a part of both these storylines, but instead, he just ends up as a way for them to overlap. we don't even take a peek in his thoughts, even though it's supposed to be an arc about the Todorokis!

I say all this as someone who eagerly waited for the day Horikoshi would portray Shouto, Katsuki, and Deku as a trio, but yeah, Shouto feels more like a third wheel than anything. if he wanted to establish them that way, he should have done it right after the sports festival arc, but after this arc, they have no scene together, and the focus shifted on Deku and Katsuki. Too little too late I guess.

To come back to the Todoroki storyline, I feel like Horikoshi simply woke up one day and decided Endeavour was more interesting to write lmao. at this point, it’s more Endeavour’s storyline than Shouto’s, even though Shouto’s supposedly one of the main characters. it has come to a point where, even though I know it ought to focus on Shouto because he’s (at least he should be) the main focus of this particular storyline, I’m hoping it won’t, because that’s just the least interesting aspect of this whole thing.

I’d say even Ochako’s treated better by the story, because at least Horikoshi tries to challenge her views and beliefs (even though for now it’s not very conclusive), while Shouto’s inner growth hasn't been put into question in how many chapters?

(btw, by inner growth, I’m not talking about his problem with his fire side, because that’s just been rinse and repeat for more than 200 chapters. I mean, srsly it’s been already 3 times since this problem has caused him to lose/fail... and it's not even satisfying like Katsuki or Deku (except for the first time in the sport festival, because that was when his character was still handled very well by Horikoshi). Why? Simply because when he loses, the stakes aren’t high, it’s all training or exams, so he’s just like, "oh, I have to maybe learn how to deal with it!", but there’s no real pressure he’s under. It’s not like Deku, who, if he does not progress, will break all his bones, and who failed to rescue Katsuki because of his broken arms (=and had a mental breakdown immediately afterwards and blamed himself). It’s not like Katsuki either, because Katsuki has a personality that makes low stakes feel like high stakes, which isn’t the case for Shouto. just compare Shouto's reaction when he loses because of his setbacks to Katsuki's reaction when he lost to Deku the first time (mental breakdown), or when Katsuki failed the provisional license exam (another mental breakdown, not caused just by his failing, but yeah). And anything else about Shouto's inner growth is tied to his reaction to Endeavour’s arc, which isn’t a flaw, and 100% depends on the way Endeavour acts. Apart from this, he has 0 internal conflict).

Sorry, I’ve gone off on a tangent lol.

To get back to the point I was making, and to further develop my analogy with Ochako, let’s look at their relationship with Deku, because there’s a major difference there, which is clearly in favor of Ochako. Deku has a big impact on Ochako, yes, but the reverse is also true. People complain she’s all about him (which, yeah, probably), but at least, she made a big impact on him too. She was the main reason ‘Deku' became his hero name. Shouto and Deku have a nice friendship, and Deku clearly considers him one of his best friends. but... it’s all one-sided in terms of impact, I can’t think of a single thing Shouto has done who changed/motivated Deku, while Deku literally changed his life. Because of this, he’s not one of the people who’s intrinsically tied to Deku’s character development, because he’s not Ochako, Inko, Katsuki or All Might (and probably soon Tomura).

His writing feels so fast compared to the others too. Shigaraki / Deku and Toga / Ochako have been paralleled for ages, have had a conversation at least once, and have had deep encounters early on. Nonetheless, both Deku and Ochako are just coming to terms with the fact these villains aren’t so different from them. However, Shouto’s only interaction with Dabi is a ten second eye contact when Dabi kidnapped Katsuki. Dabi had more interactions with Endeavour for fuck's sake! Shouto then learns Dabi’s Touya, and speed runs the development of Ochako and Deku. He doesn’t even need 10 chapters to process they’re ’the same'. Where were all the reflection and doubts? Okay, it’s his brother, so the parallels are easier, but still, it shows Horikoshi doesn’t allow Shouto to have that much introspection, and I feel it’s because Horikoshi just doesn’t care that much. Even worse! Horikoshi introduces another hero parallel to Dabi in the character of Hawks. A parallel much more interesting and compelling, because it parallels Dabi MUCH BETTER. They’re opposites in every ways (particularly in regards to their relationship with Endeavor), and know each other. Touya and Shouto don’t even seem to have spoken to each other...

And so, the only thing that still was interesting and that Horikoshi still bothered to develop was Shouto’s relationship with Endeavour, but in the end, even that was overshadowed by the much more complex, fucked up, and challenging relationships of Endeavour and Touya (and Endeavour and Hawks) as seen in 301 and before. Clearly the one Dabi’s fixated on is Endeavour.

one last thing: Shouto's stuck in a weird loop where Horikoshi kind of makes him comes close of the Bakugou and Deku duo, and then when we start to think they’re an actual trio, he does everything in his power to make it very clear how that’s NOT where he belongs either, since OFA/All Might/Deku/Katsuki is another storyline. It’s as if Horikoshi doesn’t want him here (see: how he decided the ‘win all might’ scene didn’t have to include him), but puts him there sometimes anyway. It’s probably because Shouto’s so popular, which, yeah, would be fine, if he could stick to it!

His supposed admiration for All Might (I feel like everybody forgets it's a part of his character, and I don't blame them) is brought up once every blue moon, which compared to Deku and Katsuki, is just ridiculous. And, once again, All Might has a much deeper and more interesting relationship with Endeavour than with Shouto. At this point, I don’t even know what Hori could do to make me want to read about him. I much prefer the dynamic of Hawks/Endeavour/Touya and Katsuki/Deku/All Might.

I hope the future will prove me wrong for his character. Actually, I hope everything I’m saying is wrong and idiotic, and Horikoshi will make every scene I criticized worth it and a means to an end. I mean, he clearly has the talent and writing ability to pull off some of the best character development I’ve ever seen, so anything’s possible. but yeah, I don’t really believe it for now, and I’m frustrated, because Shouto had so much potential.

tldr; I liked Shouto as a character, but he dwindled after some time, and now I feel as if he’s not the focus of his own storyline, because this place is occupied by the much more dynamic relationships of Endeavour, Touya and Hawks. And I’m not even mad, because their dynamic is much more interesting. However, I feel like Horikoshi grew bored of Shouto, and has put much more soul into Katsuki and Deku as of late.

I’m welcoming any responses, if people are seeing an aspect of his character I don’t, please enlighten me! I miss enjoying his character, and I’m not opposed to seeing him in a different light. I just needed to put down my thoughts in writing to make sense of them lol.

#bnha manga spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha 301 #todoroki family #endeavour #todoroki shouto #todoroki enji #todoroki touya #ochako uraraka #I guess #im kinda new please inform me if I'm crosstagging I swear its not on purpose #todoroki shouto meta #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #boku no hero academia #my hero academia

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scribbledquillz · 3 years

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I was tagged by @m-m-m-myysurana for this AO3 / fanfic author meme - thank you so much for thinking of me, my dear!

How many works do you have on AO3?

I'm currently sitting at twelve, though two of them are long fics that I've unfortunately had to abandon. I also have a one-shot that I initially thought would only be a drabble I'll most likely be posting there once it's complete, but we shall see.

What’s your total AO3 words count?

Oh man. I've never actually looked at this number until now. My total word count is 142,894. Holy cow.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Yikes. So I've only recently gotten back into writing fanfic regularly again, which means my new main work (Your Fire Burns in my Veins iffin you'd like to check it out. ;3) which I'd say is the best show of my current writing skill is not among the fics I've gotten the most kudos on. What I'm getting at is if you click on these, know I'm really glad that you're interested in them, but also wincing, lol.

1. Under The Stars - An old fluff piece from the very beginning of my infatuation with Revka and Zevran as a ship. Written as a "drabble" prompt that got out of hand fast.

2. To Conspire With an Antivan - Alas, one of the two long fics I needed to abandon, hence why I won't link to it. It had promise, but my writing and pov on so many things have grown past what I was doing in this fic, and I'd rather let it lie than try to go back in to fix it or start over.

3. Acquiescence - Ohhhhh thar be F!Hawke/Fenris angst here. I wrote this for a kink meme fill (are those still a thing? am I just showing my age here?) forever ago.

4. In Plain Sight - I've written a lot of smut in my day, but I'm only now realizing how little of it I've actually posted. Aside from needing to fix that (I'm shameless) this is one of the few that was shared - another Revka / Zevran piece pre reworking both of Revka's origin and timeline. Still plenty spicy - Zev gets some special attention behind a tapestry. *wink wink*

5. No Way Out - Ok. Look. I love zombies. And what do I love more than zombies? Writing F!Hawke and the Kirkwall crew in an apocalypse. I regret nothing.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Absolutely! I want the readers who take the time to comment to know how much their words mean to me and how big a motivator they are for me to keep writing when I doubt myself or the stories I'm telling.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Well, given that my fic where my mage Hawke is captured after the Chantry explosion and made tranquil is one of the two long fics I needed to abandon, I'd say Acquiescence would have the most angst. Though I wanted to go out of my way to show there was no bitterness or anything of the like involved at the end - more just sad acceptance. That being said the rest of my fics do (and will) continue to end with a more hopeful conclusion.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Since I haven't finished YFBimV (and won't for some time) I'd have to say it would have to be my one-shot Reassurances. It was a gift fic with an OT3 of Hawke, Fenris and Isabela, and was just such a nice, soft moment for the trio to reaffirm they're all exactly where they want to be.

Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you’ve ever written?

I haven't as of yet, and most likely won't. It would have to be a very specific type of crossover.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Oh thank God no. I've got a thicker skin than I used to when it comes to my writing, but I'd definitely still cry like a baby.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Heh heh heh. Yeeeep. And I intend to write more. >:3 I've done mostly f/m smut, but also f/f as well.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No, and ngl I think I'd be more flattered than angry if I did - not flattered enough not to report it, but still flattered.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not a fic, though the timeline of YFBimV was developed (and continues to be developed) with the help of my friend @pathosian, who was so kind as to let me borrow her Kerrigan Hawke to play Barbies with.

What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Zevka Zevka Zevka Zevka Zevka Zevka Zevka Zevka

But I also deeply appreciate any Zevwarden ship out there because my man deserves happiness. I also really love Fenris/Hawke (especially mage Hawke), and am getting more and more invested in Varric/Adaar as I think up my new Inquisitor. Out of DA fandom I am also an unrepentant Zuko/Katara shipper. But lbr - I love ships in general.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Ahhh I mentioned them above. Some things just aren't meant to be, sadly.

What are your writing strengths?

I really feel like I do a good job at nailing down character voices. The way they speak, their body language, the expressions they tend to make, and if writing from their POV what their internal monologue tends to be in any given situation.

I also feel really confident in my ability to write highly emotional moments; describing the physical response an emotion brings out in a character, how they react internally vs how they express their reaction outward, that kind of thing. It's my favorite part of writing fic.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Ugh. Action. Not just in fight scenes (though those are a hell of a struggle) but in calmer moments too. I always second guess myself if something is too detailed or not enough when it comes to writing out how something happens.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

It doesn't bother me personally. I do use it a little myself, but generally only as flavoring, or (favorite trope ahead) when a character isn't ready to give words to how they feel about something/someone and so say it in their native tongue instead. *cough* Zevran *cough* I use it pretty sparingly, though.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

I'm having a sudden, violent flashback to 12 year old me giggling to myself as I write bad Harry Potter fanfic under my blankets at 1 am on a school night.

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

Oh gosh. I had the most fun writing No Way Out (because zombies) but is it tacky to say Your Fire Burns in my Veins? I've been shipping Revka with Zevran for aaaaaages now, and it's really satisfying to finally be putting the whole of their story to word rather than just bouncing around disjointedly in my head.

Thank you so much again for the tag, @m-m-m-myysurana, this was a lot of fun to do!

I'll go ahead and tag: @heniareth, @lorioganneb and @calebara as well as anyone else who wants to have a go at this! Please tag me, I'd love to read your answers. :3

#about lilou #lilou writes #the total word count blew my mind #I've done. a lot of fic writing. lol

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lordeasriel · 4 years

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hdm theory: the Thuringia Potash company is owned by the Delamares

I was just ranting on discord but @cozcat convinced me to post here too, so here we are, buckle up for some long ass post. Spoilers for The Secret Commonwealth. Keep in mind this is a theory, which I don't do often, but yes, this one feels unusually solid. This also goes a little further than just the company ownership, I do not know the concept of “direct and precise” lol

So, here's the thing:

We know the men from the mountains were blamed for the attacks on the Tashbulak station (the one Anthony Hassall came from, about the roses) and the attacks on many gardens across all over Central Asia. They are considered fanatics, many dialogues confirm the legitimacy of those claims (albeit there are a few things to consider, such as Magisterium Christians being prejudiced, the fact the men from the mountains are likely an ethnic group and most of the claims come from White Europeans and so on). Despite these, there are enough claims by many different people about how these men truly believe a different Creed and they are harsh about it.

Marcel is after the roses in the name of the Magisterium, the why doesn't really matter at this stage. He knows a lot more about the men from the mountains than he lets on, which we later learn. He already knows about the Tashbulak station being attacked before the merchant tells him about it. He becomes President of the High Council after the Patriarch gets killed by alleged men from the mountains (and I don't believe they truly were men from the mountains, he just made it look that way - keep this in mind).

Godwin learns that a Pharmaceutical company called Thuringia Potash seems to be funding the men from the mountains, which Malcolm later learns from the only survivor of the station, that these men were ridiculously well-armed for tribal folk living in the desert. Godwin's contact points out the benefits of funding this particular group, and as a result of their attack on a research station that harboured scientists from several different countries (many of these, related or absolutely ruled by the Magisterium), could not only give the Magisterium a casus belli to invade Central Asia (the Karamakan being ruled by a minor king, vassal of the Emperor of Cathay, the equivalent of China), but could also incline these countries that lost scientists, to support the Magisterium in the war effort.

He points out how Brytain could be a strong candidate for this request of aid (especially because they are trying hard to keep peace with Geneva), as the Magisterium has made considerable political moves within the country, most likely to prepare it for its future request of men and water canons. He points out that there's talk of minerals and chemicals being abundant in the desert, which is drawing the attention of the Pharmaceutical companies, but the information is not quite reliable.

“There’s talk of a source of valuable chemicals or minerals or something in a desert in the middle of some howling wildernesss, and it’s a matter of strategic importance for the Magisterium not to let anyone else get at it before they do. There’s a very strong commercial interest as well. Pharmaceuticals, mainly. It’s all a bit blurred, to tell you the truth.” TSC, ch. 29.

Anita Schlesinger then claims that she did a paper on TP, that was never published; they were an old company, very powerful and practically involved with everything economically worthwhile.

"But about twenty years ago TP began to diversify into manufacturing as well [weapons, explosives and chemicals], because that's where the profit was. Arms and pharmaceuticals, mainly. They're enormous, Malcolm, and they used to loathe publicity, but markets don't work like that, and they're having to adapt to new ways of doing things. (...) They're privately owned, no shareholders demanding dividends." The Secret Commonwealth, ch. 29.

“Times change, and understandings must change too.” Marcel Delamare, TSC, ch. 1

Okay, so considering all these points, what if Thuringia Potash is actually owned by the Delamares?

The avid interest by the pharmaceutical companies in the rose oil is a recurring comment throughout the book. Miriam tells Lyra that her father is struggling to find a good source for the roses to make his products and that “apparently the big medical companies are buying everything up before anyone else can--” (TSC, ch. 2).

She doesn’t really specify which company, but she says it in plural, which means that many of them are after the rose oil, any roses and rose oil they can acquire. Roses and rose oil seem to be very popular in Lyra’s world, specially in what I’ll call the posh community lmao like academics, aristocrats, not to mention that people use roses to make perfumes, rose water and so on. Both Marcel (under the Magisterium banner) and TP seem to have an interest in securing the rose oil dominance too, each of them for their own reason. Marcel wants to do something dogmatic with the roses, he talks about changing the truth at its very core, his motives seem to serve the Magisterium more than himself personally, although is difficult to make this claim with 100% certainty because the information we have is very slim.

“First, we could suppress all knowledge of it, by rigorous investigation, by ruthless force. (...) The second possibility is to go to the root of the problem and wipe it out. (...) The amount of rose oil that’s ever come this far is very small; supplies of it would dry up and cease altogether, and the problem would wither away. That solution would take longer and cost more than the first, but we could do it, and it would be final. (...) There is a third option. We could embrace the facts. The roses exist; they show us something we’ve always denied, something that contradicts the deepest truths we know about the Authority and his creation; there is no doubt about that. So we could admit it boldly, contradict the teachings of millennia, proclaim a new truth. (...) I haven’t told you the fourth option. Revealing the truth in the way I described would not work. There are too many habits, ways of thought, institutions, that are committed to the way things are and always have been. The truth would be swept away at once. Instead, we should delicately and subtly undermine the idea that truth and facts are possible in the first place. Once the people have become doubtful about the truth of anything, all kinds of things will be open to us.” Marcel’s adapted speech. TSC, ch. 16. (It’s adapated a bit because it’s too long and too dialogue driven, but it’s quote on quote)

I’ve highlighted the lines I think are more relevant to this particular theory, and it shows that Marcel has already used pretty much all of the methods he suggested, in different ways and order, but all focused on getting hold of the roses. He wants them for a philosophical, dogmatic, even social purpose. He wants to rebuild the truth in a very particular and precise way.

But the rumours around the big pharma is that they want to control the production of attar of roses for profit, which makes no sense if they are working together to seize Karamakan. Their aspirations do not align at all, especially if Marcel wants to seize the roses to reinvent the creed of the Church.

During The Cafe Cosmopolitan chapter, when Simon Talbot is talking to some of the men who attended the Magisterium gathering, he meets an executive of TP who talks good things about Marcel, and somehow even endorses him. Talbot thinks he is responsible for such a thing, but I entirely disagree: I think the executive praises Marcel in a room full of Magisterium leaders, so openly and so ridiculously intentionally, as he says the future is with young men when the Magisterium is essentially made up by very old leaders, because they are executing Marcel's plan.

“It’s the younger men who hold the future,” said a man in a dark suit who was an executive of Thuringia Potash, one of the corporate sponsors [of the Magisterium congress], a powerful pharmaceutical company. “Such as the Secretary General of La Maison Juste.” “(...) An extraordinarily able man.” “(...) He seems very keen to promote this idea of a council,” said the Preceptor. “Well, frankly, so are we,” said the Thuringia Potash executive. “And I think it would do well to include your Monsieur Delamare in its ranks.” TSC, ch. 14.

The sudden addition of Marcel’s name to the conversation of potential council members is absolutely unprompted. Until that moment, they had only spoken about older and more traditionalist members. He is hardly remembered by other men in the room, except for Talbot who is on his payroll and the executive for, well, another set of reasons this theory mentions, such as they are in cahoots.

Being backed by someone outside the Magisterium, someone whom he had no connection to, was beneficial to how Marcel was perceived. Suddenly, he wasn't just a power hungry young leader suggesting an almighty council, he doesn't even allow himself to be elected as president at first (he understand that it would make him seem too eager to get power), but the TP executive praises him and his youth and his work for the council, which creates the idea of "maybe Delamare is the right man for the job”.

They, of course, elect the Patriarch, who is a saint, a modest, and very old and traditionalist man. It's not a surprise, but when he dies, they elect the very opposite of the Patriarch, someone young, new, with more unorthodox ideas, a fresh leadership. All with the backing of a company whose commercial interests seem to conflict with the Magisterium’s (more like Marcel’s, truth be told) desire to get ahold of the roses.

In News from Tashbulak, Godwin is told about how the men from the mountains are funded by Thuringia Potash, although not entirely openly. By giving them weapons, TP enables them to attack the gardens and the research station (an international collaboration, as I pointed out earlier), murdering people while on a crusade against the Church's truth and giving them a reason to strike back, although the Church doesn’t really care about them specifically. While there are claims of men from the mountains attacking the Patriarch, I do not believe this was enticed by their fanaticism. In fact, I think it's even possible these were hired guns, dressed to be identified as men from the mountains, but not really them. And that's because killing the Patriarch doesn't seem to align with their hatred for their roses, but it does align with Delamare's rise to power. (it is essentially canon that he did get the Patriarch killed).

“So he was elected unanimously. With sorrow and reluctance he accepted the great responsibility, proclaiming his unworthiness in phrases so perfectly turned they might almost have been composed in advance of the terrible and utterly unpredictable events in Constantinople.” TSC, ch. 22

It’s all very convenient that TP just seems to be funding a sort of terrorist group, whose every move somehow benefits a rather small Magisterium leader in the middle of Europe. While it makes sense for companies to back political groups and leaders, TP’s ultimate goal for the roses is a commercial kind of goal; they wish to make profit out of this situation, by being sole owner of the rose strain or at least sharing it with as few competitors as possible. The Rose Oil’s properties really can benefit and interest many different people (which I might talk about in another theory post later), but ultimately it’s a matter between the philosophical use of it and the proper, commercial applications of it. Which is why I think that TP’s interest in the rose oil is just a façade to divert the idea that maybe, just maybe, they have some sort of deep involvement with Marcel.

Anita claims that TP got involved in manufacturing weapons and chemicals in the last 20 years (just coincidentally with Lyra’s birth *cough* lmao), and how they hated publicity and now they've changed, and they're openly doing stuff like promoting themselves and backing random Magisterium leaders, huh. Maybe it's just smoke and mirrors, to prevent a connection to be made between the Magisterium and the company.

More importantly though, Marcel being funded by a company that cannot be tied to him, furthering his agenda, is a lot more appealing as a concept, especially if he is the owner of the company. Why would they back him, politically, at the risk of being backstabbed (which would likely happen, because they want different things for the rose business, not to mention Marcel’s bad habit of getting rid of loose ends)? They risk a lot to benefit Marcel by funding the men from the mountains, and having executives praise him and his righteouness and his visionary vibes and all that. It’s a lot for a company that has no proper ties to him, the excuse of simply “Business” does not feel enough to justify their actions.

So, what I propose here is:

Thuringia Potash is a company owned by his family. With his father gone, his mother likely was in charge of the company, but she doesn’t strike me as a CEO type of woman, so she just left people in charge and chose a more hands-off and private approach to the business, hence the dislike for publicity (a very old people mindset of business style tbf). But, during the events of TSC, we learn she’s been very sick, perhaps for an even longer period of time, which could mean Marcel now had to take care of the company himself, despite having his own career in the Church. Marcel, unlike his mother, is a man of many avenues and he sees an opportunity in the company - that has little to no ties to him in a meaningful way. I mean, considering how Marisa just made up names for herself, it’s not far fetched to think they could have a different name in ownership of the company. That’s easily done, in my opinion, and in character for the Delamares. Besides that, Marcel is a man who takes great care of his public persona; it would be reasonable for him to dettach himself from the company in order to preserve a clean image of himself. He is considered to be a modest, uninteresting and dull man, and he seems to go to extreme lengths to preserve that image of harmlessness and disinterest.

With that in mind, owning the company, Marcel now has the means to fund directly an armed militia to suit his goal, which is to arouse unrest in Central Asia, and create a political incident to justify the invasion by the Magisterium. Unlike the previous war, which seems to have been focused on taking control of Brytain, this war is all about the rose garden and the rose oil itself, with a philosophical theme underneath. Invading a desert is no small feat, and from what we gathered from the text, Marcel is still trying to find where is the garden/the red building (and there is also the fact that it’s a 2-way journey, so good luck with that babe).

This is an important thing, because if Marcel changes the perception of the truth, and that could be many things but I’m leaning towards “Dust is not actually Sin but in fact our very nature”, people would perceive the rose oil usage as something to be done by priests and preachers and by the Church alone. The attack on the rose farms show that these men from the mountains are being organised by a higher force (which likely is headed by The Brotherhood of This Holy Purpose), making claims about evil roses and wanting gardens destroyed, but with no actual fundamentals to it. Destroying all the gardens doesn't affect the actual attar of roses thing, because the proper oil hails from the red building and it’s said that the proper “magical” oil hasn’t been widespread, but it does create an atmosphere of hate and fear around the rose oil, or even better, it leads you to think that if extremists and heretics want to destroy it, then it must be a good thing. People would flock towards the Magisterium in search for the truth.

This does align with one of my theories for Marcel: that he wants to make the Rose Oil something to be idolised and those that consumed it, to be considered true prophets. By having the men from the mountains wanting the roses gone, once the Church comes forward and claim the oil is actually good and divine, people will take that answer adamantly and it could even justify why the Church is so protective of it, keeping it from the public. It's a similar process of how they turned Dust into sin: by creating fear and twisted truths around it. If Marcel manages to capture the garden, the Magisterium will hold the rose oil that has a direct correlation to Dust, while TP would have seized all the other rose supplies from the East, allowing them to profit from traditional rose oil business or simply acting as suppliers.

I genuinely do not think Marcel has a money interest in all of this, although money wouldn’t harm him much. This idea also aligns with my second theory for Marcel’s goals (the one I’m more inclined towards, to be honest), which is to democratise the Truth by proving the existence of Dust and then disregarding it, but this is a little tricky so I’m leaving this one out for now. Thanks for coming to this TED talk lmao

#his dark materials #the book of dust #hdm meta: marcel delamare #hdm meta: delamare family #hdm meta: rose oil #i need a better tagging system for this lmao #pls i know philman is just gonna absolutely forgot about this plotline but here i am #let me know if u have any thoughts on this #meta by effie

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pandas-pandemonium · 5 years

Text

Per Sempre Insieme

Pairing: Yandere!Team Buccellati x Fem!Stand User!Reader

Warnings: Violence, Yandere (in later chapters), Slow Burn, Angst

Setting: Post-Vento Aureo, Everyone Lives!AU, Post-PHF

Chapters: 1, 2, 3 , More to Come

Summary: Catching the eye of the new don of Passioné was the last thing a hitman like yourself wanted to do, but what's worse is that you capture the attention and hearts of five other men too. Along with trying to avenge your sister's death, as well as dealing with six lovesick men, how will you ever survive?

1.6k words

Chapter 1

June 2003, Naples, Italy

Summer, the time of the year Giorno both loved and hated at the same time. Summer was great, mainly because he had summer vacation, allowing him to focus on running Passione during the next three months. However, he couldn’t find the heat enjoyable in the slightest. With the burning sun out at 11 in the morning already, he was regretting his decision to personally visit his favourite restaurant to collect the protection money. Heck, Bruno himself offered to do so, and so did countless other members of the mafia. But for some reason, he denied their offers to perform the task and headed there himself. It wasn’t like there was much danger anyways, few people knew the new don of Passione's face. He did however, bring along Sheila E. as his bodyguard, just to give Bruno peace of mind. The older man just wouldn’t stop insisting he bring someone along for his protection.

He was about halfway to the restaurant when a blur of [H/C] flew right by him and into the alleyway the two happened to pass. Fortunately, the Don recovered quickly enough to see a girl, perhaps not much older than him, pull open a door from the wall and disappeared in a blink of an eye.

“A stand user?” He wondered to himself under his breath. His interest in the passing stand user did not go by Sheila’s eyes as she tilted her head and looked up at the taller male.

“Is there anything you would need me to do, D- Giorno?” she asked, catching herself from addressing her boss by his title just in time. Giorno’s blue eyes shifted to the smaller female, and smiled gently.

“Not at the moment Sheila…Perhaps after we finish what we came here for, then we can look into that…incident,” he said. The girl nodded and resumed walking towards the restaurant.

After an hour or so, the duo walked out of the restaurant, stomachs full from the early lunch they just had, and headed to the alleyway they last saw the [H/C] girl disappear in.

“Sheila, I would like you to use your stand here, so we can figure out who that stand user was, or at least, their motives. It’s been two years, but new stand users are always an asset,” the blonde said. Wordlessly, the bodyguard nodded her head and withdrew her stand, Voodoo Child. Immediately, the stand got to work, furiously punching the wall and ground hard enough that it began to crack open. After a few moments, lips formed from the cracks and began to speak.

“Damn it, when the hell is that darn geezer gonna bank in my pay?! I took out the guy just like he asked me to!”

“Ah man, setting up house here is the worst idea…It’s got the worst view ever! I can barely tell evening from day in the mansion.”

“Ugh! Some assholes decided to spit in front of my doorstep! I swear if I catch them, I’ll beat them to death for it.”

Giorno held up his hand, and Sheila stopped the voices.

“Well, I wasn’t sure what I was hoping to find out, but at the very least it doesn’t seem like the user has left. Perhaps if we stay out here long enough, she should come out again. I would like to see how her stand works, it could be useful for the transportations team,” he said. Giorno then clapped his hands together and headed to leave the dim alleyway, his bodyguard trailing behind.

Upon reaching the Passione base, Giorno immediately called two men to keep watch over that particular alleyway, and to bring the stand user to him directly. It wasn’t much, but he was glad he trusted his intuition to go out this afternoon. After all, if his men succeed in locating and retrieving the stand user, Passione could only benefit from it.

~~~~

It was past two in the morning when you finally finished your job; exterminating a mole in some big business you barely cared for. The CEO paid you big bucks for it, and that was what mattered. You found it amusing how willing the rich and powerful are to go to such dirty means to prevent their secrets from getting out. Now, you were on your way down a street of Naples, heading towards your temporary hideout. Sure, you could simply set up your house any where you want, but the alleyway you chose was near one of your favourite restaurants, which was convenient.

Just as you were approaching the dark alleyway, you froze. There, sitting on a wall, was a man clothed in black, almost unnoticeable for someone who wasn’t trained to see in the dark. You backed up, holding your hands up in a fighting position, ready to defend yourself if necessary.

“Who are you and who sent you?” you demanded, trying to keep your voice level, as to not betray your feelings. Truth be told, you were nervous. Were you really that careless? Who in the world could have sent someone to catch you? Aside from those who related to those who were killed by your hands, you doubt you made many enemies. You were a paid hitman, and you always made sure to cover your tracks so people don’t come after you. So far, no one has traced the assassinations back to you, so who?

The man spoke soon enough, “The Don of Passione wants to recruit you. Consider this a personal invitation into the mafia. Lucky you, you don’t even have to pass a test.” You raised an eyebrow.

The Don of Passione? The new one? Last you heard, Passione changed bosses and the one leading the gang currently was a young man who took over the position as Don when he was only a teenager.

“What the hell does a mafioso want with me? Does he even know who I am?” you asked. The man jumped down from his position and sighed.

“Who knows. What he does know however, is that you may have a pretty useful stand he could have use for. I’m just carrying out orders. If you refuse to come with me, I’m more than willing to use force,” he said, arms crossed. You swallowed. You really had been careless. You completely forgot that there were bound to be other stand users roaming streets of Napoli, and of all people to catch sight of you using your stand, it had to be freaking Passione’s don?

You laughed, “If he thinks I’m going to comply so easily, he mustn’t have very good judgment.” With that, you pulled out your gun. As if you were going to reveal your stand this easily. If the don was that serious about recruiting you, he better had sent one of his best.

“Oh, sweetie, you really think that gun is going to protect you. If you’re a stand user, make it a stand fight!” yelled the man. From the corner of your eye, you saw light grey humanoid-ish shape seep into the pavement below you. Hurriedly you jumped back, your eyes scanning your surroundings, watching out for any signs of attack.

“It’s useless, miss. Once Penny Lane’s taken over any object, there’s no way of avoiding it,” the man calmly spoke. Just then, the concrete under your feet began to warp, slowly melting into a liquid form. Panicking, you searched for higher ground. You had to get off the concrete fast, and uncover his stand’s secret. Internally, you cursed. Of course, an offensive stand type user is sent to get you. Tonight, really wasn’t your night. The ground was rapidly turning to liquid and so were other things around you. If you didn’t get out of the stand’s range fast, you’d be trapped in the concrete.

“Well? Will you draw out your stand or will you keep trying to run through liquid cement?” taunted the man. You cursed under your breath. Well, if the gang member had shown his, you might as well right? So, you turned around, as quickly as you could, as your pants were caked in cement, which was drying fast.

“If I show you my stand you’ll stop right?” you asked, holding up your hands in surrender. The man nodded and you took a deep breath, allowing the light golden spirit to appear beside you. Its eyes were a blank white, and it appeared to be wearing a butler’s suit.

“This is Soul’s Mansion. It’s not a fighting type stand, so don’t worry about me trying to attack you. Now, will you stop this?” you asked as you let your stand disappear. The man shrugged and recalled his stand back. Unfortunately for you, you had made an error in your request. You had asked him to turn the cement back into concrete but had forgotten that you would be stuck ankle deep in the pavement. Flushing an angry red, you panicked.

“W-wait! Turn it back into liquid, I need to get out of here!”

The man raised his eyebrow, “And let you escape? Of course not. You don’t have to worry though; my partner will get you out of there. I hope to see you back at the base,” he called out as he turned to leave, leaving you stuck in the concrete. Just as he left, a woman of significant height walked towards you from the other side of the road.

“It’s a shame it ended so quickly. I was really enjoying seeing your panicked expression. Anyways, as per the boss’s orders, let’s you take you back, shall we?” she said with a smile, her light blue eyes twinkling under the dark sky. You swallowed thickly as you stared up at the woman, a deep feeling of dread pooling in your stomach.

~~~~

A/N: I thought I'd just drop this lol. I was too impatient, and it'll be one thing less on my mind while I work on the other requests. Feedback and questions are greatly appreciated! So are likes and reblogs!

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thesunnyshow · 4 years

Text

Name: Emmy

Writing Blog URL(s): @pastelsicheng

What fandom(s) do you write for?: NCT

Age: 19

Nationality: Canadian

Languages: fluent-ish in English, French, Urdu, Hindi, Pujarati, Punjabi, Arabic (listed in order from languages I can speak/read/write in, to languages I can't write/read/speak but can understand)

Star Sign: Aries

MBTI: INFP-T

Favorite color: I like most colours but I always just say purple

Favorite food: Khow Suey. Idk how to describe it in English but it’s like noodles that you mix with like thick yellow curry and chicken tarkari, and you can put fried onions on top and what I call samosa crumbs (basically the crunchy dough you use for samosas, it’s like the dough fried alone and you just crush it and put it on top), and I add a bit of ketchup too cause its noodles and it's so good

Favorite ice cream flavor: Cookies and cream, or just basic french vanilla

Favorite animal: I love most of them hahah but I will say elephants

Coffee or tea? What are you ordering?: Coffee most likely but I love tea more

Dream job (whether you have a job or not): Open my own cafe

If you could have one superpower, what would you choose?: Control time

If you could restart your life, knowing what you do now, would you?: No thank you I don't want to live through this again

Would you rather fight 100 chicken-sized horses or one horse-sized chicken?: 100 chicken-sized horses because I heard chickens eat people so uhhh no thanks

If you were a trope in a teen high school movie, what would you have been?: The overachieving nerd/student council president. That’s literally what I was

Do you believe in aliens/supernatural creatures?: Yes. Aliens and ghosts and demons, they’re all real. Not fairies and vampires and werewolves tho.

Do you have a role model? If so, who?: There’s definitely people I look up to and try to learn from for various things, but I don’t think I have like one solid role model

Fun fact about yourself that not everyone would know?: I used to be a tomboy when I was a kid, and probably still am deep inside

When did you post your first piece?

January 2020

Why did you start writing on Tumblr?

I found it easier to gain feedback and find an audience of readers on Tumblr, plus the site was just easier for me to navigate compared to like Wattpad

Do you write fluff/angst/crack/general/smut, combo, etc? Why?

I write anything I feel like writing, and am open to trying new stuff. I just won’t write smut. I don’t feel comfortable writing or reading it

Do you write OCs, X Readers, Ships...etc?

I write x readers

Who is your favorite person to write about?

I don’t have a favourite person, mainly because I pick people based on who I think would fit a certain concept best. I guess my favourite would be y/n LOL because y/n is in every fic and I put myself into their character.

What inspires you to write?

I just like writing. I get a lot of ideas of stuff I want to write, and as a kid I wanted to be an author, but that obviously isn’t happening anytime soon so I just write fanfics. They’re easier to write because characters are already developed for you, and they don’t have a word limit to how long and short they need to be compared to actual OC fics

What genres/AUs do you enjoy writing the most?

Anything that relates to normal people, I enjoy writing. I like to insert my own experiences and thoughts in my stories so I write scenarios that I can imagine myself in or things I’ve experienced already, stuff like that

What do you hope your readers take away from your work?

I just want them to enjoy what I write. I’d like for my fics to be memorable, but idk if they are lol

What do you do when you hit a rough spot creatively?

I just don’t write. It’s bad but I don’t want to write something that I don’t like so I don’t force myself to write when I don’t feel like it. If it takes me months to get out of that rough spot, then oh well. I don’t want to force myself to do anything that would make me hate writing, since it's one of the only few hobbies of mine.

What is your favorite work and why? Your most successful?

Most successful is murder replay. My favourite is an unreleased fic that I’m still working on. It’s pretty self-indulgent, and I talk about internal conflict with sexuality and not knowing what you really want, alongside being insecure and having mental illnesses. It’s angsty but it’s one of my favourites because of how much of myself I’ve poured into it

Do you think there’s a difference between writing fanfiction vs. completely original prose?

It’s the same. Aside from the character being a real life person, fanfiction is the exact same as prose because it’s completely original ideas and thoughts, completely original sentences, and in general just the exact same as original prose. There’s like no difference.

What do you think makes a good story?

A writer who enjoys what they’re doing. It doesn’t matter your skill level or your language skills, or whatever. If you are passionate about what you write, then it will be evident in the story, and it will be a great story. There’s other things like the story idea and genre, but that’s all dependent on the reader. What I think makes a good story is different from what someone else thinks makes a good story. But in general, it’s the author that makes it good. You can tell if the writer really liked what they were doing, or if they were just writing for the sake of throwing words on a document and then calling it a day.

What is your writing process like?

Get an idea. Make a doc with that idea. Either immediately try and develop details, or leave the idea as is for months, maybe years. After developing the details, write the beginning of the fic, a few scenes I really liked, and then call it a day and never open the document for a few months again lol. Then I wait until I’m in the mood to write for that specific fic, and then I will write as much as I can. Finishing fics is a struggle, I’ve yet to finish my longer ones lol. I have a terrible writing process. The only way I really finish is if I already told my followers i will post it and theyre all waiting for it. Then I feel bad leaving people hanging and so it motivates me to finish. But yeah once I actually finish it, I throw it into grammarly and some other editors, fix stuff up, and publish.

Would you ever repurpose a fic into a completely original story?

Doubt it. Once I’m done with a fic, I’m done. I don’t really want to go back and change anything. Even the longer fics that I love, I get sick of them and so I just dont want to touch them once they're done.

What tropes do you love, and what tropes can’t you stand?

I’m a huge sucker for childhood best friends to lovers lol. I have gushed about this on my blog a few times. Just the fact that you know someone for that long, and even been through arguments and times of not talking to each other, just to still come back to each other, thats real love even if its platonic. I’m just a sucker for that stuff. I also really enjoy anything that I, as a normal person, can relate to so high school AUs, college AUs, platonic AUs, anything real life based. There’s no tropes that I can’t stand, just tropes I don’t find interest in or don’t read much.

How much would you say audience feedback/engagement means to you?

Depends on how long i took to write the fic. If it’s a short piece ranging between a few hundred words to maybe a couple thousand words then I don’t really care much because chances are I didn’t take long to write it. My pieces that are longer than 5k, I care about because those are usually the ones more close to my heart, and the ones I spent way more time than necessary working on. Even just one reader telling me they enjoyed my story makes my day

What has been one of the biggest factors of your success (of any size)?

I know murder replay which is my current biggest story blew up, and I feel like part of it was because of the frequent updating I did. I kept a schedule and made sure to stick with it, even changing parts of the story to fit feedback from readers. Consistency was definitely key, and also engaging with readers. Replying to all their reblogs even if it was just tags they added, constantly expressing how grateful I am, stuff like that because it makes people feel that they’re validated as well. And I guess the general idea/trope of the fic was interesting to people too

Do you think fanfic writers get unfairly judged?

Yeah lol. It’s definitely something I hide from everyone I know in real life because I dont want to be looked down on.

Do you think art can be a medium for change?

Yes!! Art defies boundaries set by language, especially visual art. Stories are a good way to express things to people who don’t understand why something is the way it is, it’s literally what has been done by humans since the start of time. We pass down stories explaining things.

Do you ever feel there are times when you’re writing for others, rather than yourself?

Yeah, sometimes when I felt really burnt out, I felt I had to post an update or something just so that my followers got what they kinda signed up for when they followed me. It was partially just the pressure I put onto myself I guess because my followers are always supportive and understanding when I say I cant post an update. I’d also say in general there’s a part of me that wants to write for others too. I would be lying if I said I only write for myself because that’s not true. The whole reason I write and post is because I want some reader interaction and feedback, and if I truly did only write for myself I wouldn’t be posting.

Do you ever feel like people have misunderstood you or your writing at times?

Not yet! And I hope I don’t have to experience that lol

Do your offline friends/loved ones know you write for Tumblr?

Nope. No one does. It’s something I wanna keep to myself. Even some of my other internet friends don’t know.

What is one thing you wish you could tell your followers?

I purposely send a bunch of messages because I feel bad leaving people on read so I just keep sending hearts and stuff to express my love but also just so that you can end the convo when you feel like.

Do you have any advice for aspiring writers who might be too scared to put themselves out there?

Go for it! It might be scary to get criticism, but I promise there are way more nice people on Tumblr than there are mean people. In fact I haven’t even interacted or met with a mean anon or person on here yet. Also the only way to really start is to go for it. I get anxious too every time I post something, even now, and honestly its just a feeling ya know. Its just chemicals in your body. So don’t stress, and if you always need someone to boost your ego and promote your work you have me!

Are there any times when you regret joining Tumblr?

Nope

Do you have any mutuals who have been particularly formative/supportive in your Tumblr journey?

The memorable ones are Mimu, Nini, Gwen, Philo, and Krystal who were supportive of murder replay. Also sunflower anon and peace sign anon, and recently Jo has been really supportive.

Pick a quote to end your interview with

“...the universe is basically like a machine. I don’t know who made it, if it was the Fates, or the gods, or capital-G God, or whatever. But it chugs along the way it’s supposed to most of the time. Sure, little pieces break and stuff goes haywire once in a while, but mostly . . . things happen for a reason.” Leo Valdez in The House of Hades (so technically Riordan lol)

BONUS: K-POP CONFIDENTIAL

Interested in your very own episode of The Sunny Show? Find out how to apply here.

#@pastelsicheng #thesunnyshow #featuredauthor #episode 19 #nct

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princesscandijane · 4 years

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How do you feminize you? I've tried many times without success :/ so sad

I will tell you it was not an overnight thing, and it did take some work. In fact it took me years to get to this point. Somethings were certainly easier than other. These are the things that I did and if you are able to, I would suggest the same. Being a sissy is all mental, so much that I still have so much to learnFirst and foremost go at your own speed. Don't rush into anything that you are not comfortable with. Treat this like yoga, push yourself, but if it is too much take a step back. This applies to everything I mention below. There is still so much I have to experience but I am going at my own speed, and that's ok.Next thing is CHASTITY!!! I cannot stress this enough but take that little clitty of yours and lock it up 🔐 It intensifies the feeling by sooooo much. If you are new to chastity then start off slow. It may feel a little uncomfortable at first, so take it an hour at a time, and work your way up. When I started I had no interest in chastity, but after hearing from so many to try it out, I finally did, and it I haven't looked back. Best purchase for any sissy. I doubt you will find a sissy that has tried chastity that will say otherwise. These days chastity is my natural state, and couldn't be happier 😄 How deep you want to go is up to you, but be careful you may find yourself at the mercy of merciless key holder 😧Another thing that helped was filling my sissy hole. If you are new to this, take this slowly, do research, do not be stingy with the lube, start small and work yourself up. I started with a finger, then got a butt plug, then bigger butt plugs, then dildos, then... we'll see lol John Mulaney does a great job describing the first time something goes up there https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNlyZSvsNjw The first several times I put things in my bum, it was not comfortable, butt after a little bit it starts to feel pleasurable. Thanks to toxic masculinity, a male experimenting with anal pleasure is less than man, great for a sissy mindset, but horrible for society. You don't have to be a sissy, gay, you can be a 0 on the kinsey scale and enjoy some ass play, and it certainly won't make you any less of a man. I do remember the first time I used a butt plug I was a little sore the next day, walked a little different, and couldn't shake the thought that my bum has been filled. Don't focus so much on having the elusive sissygasm, and just enjoy the feeling. Besides sissys don't always get to cum.Speaking of cum, EAT IT. That is one of those barriers a sissy needs to break. Start with your own cum obviously. It is something that all of sissys want to do while we're horny and touching ourselves, but once we blow our load we feel super deflated and lose our nerve. I started with lifting my legs in the air and trying to shoot it in my mouth. I got some in my mouth, but a lot on my face, I had to scoop the rest off my face and eat it. I went from finding cum to be 🤢 to 🤤🤤🤤Go smooth. This one took me longer than it should of. It is not weird to be male and be smooth. I get advertisements on Hulu about manscaping. If nothing else shave your clitty. Even if you want to be the manliest man, or whatever, anyone sucking your cock and balls will appreciate not getting hair in their teeth. I certainly don't want to deal with an amazon to suck cock lol As far as legs, arms, torso, arm pits, tell everyone you think it is disgusting, because it is. Steve Carrell or check out Hugh Jackman's legs when he's deadlifting vs any movie with Ryan Gosling, Matt Damon, or any other modern sex symbol topless. What I'm getting at is you can be smooth and manly in public, yet also get the wonderful feeling of being smooth as a sissy. The feeling over anything over freshly shaved legs feels amazing, you would be surprised on how much feeling hair interferes with. Once I put stockings on my freshly shaved legs, I never wanted to be hairy again. Get and wear clothes that make you feel sexy and cute. This seems easy, but is super tough. At least for me it is. I don't know fashion at all, and I am learning that what is amazing on the model will not work for me, so much wasted money lol #sissy struggles The important thing though is that it makes you feel sexy. A good wig also helps, anytime you can look in the mirror and see the sissy you envision the better. But do not be critical. Every sexy photo, or even unsexy photo you see of mine is picked from a lot of really bad pics. There's angles and lighting and things I don't know 'cause I'm not a photographer. Practice giving a blowjob. You don't have to buy a dildo, though you should lol but go to the vegi department and pick up some phallic veggies treat it like a cock. Suck it as if it were a cock, I learned from Fast Times at Ridgemont High https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZ-MY6zjRHU you don't have to deep throat, but learning is such an accomplishment, certainly has made me hungrier Exercise, being a sissy should be a motivator to exercise. Exercersing isn't the funnest thing, it's tough to do, and really hard to keep up with. A sissy needs to take care of themselves, there are so many programs out there and gyms, and ways to keep in shape. I am a bit of a fitness person and so it is certainly easier for me. There are a lot of programs out there, but what you need to find is something that you can reasonably do forever (insert for-ev-er meme). It doesn't have to be anything super cazy, but if you can find 20 minutes 4 times a week to workout than you will be on a great path. Working out is exausting, you will sweat, you will get sore, you will feel discomfort, and at times it is not fun. Fight through those down swings, think of your goals. Having a sexy body does take work. Anyone that you idolize online, or invision yourself is probably someone that takes care of themselves and spends time suffering at the gym. I say suffering, because sometimes it is, but find an exercise routine you like. And do not worry about gaining muscle and being unsexy with muscle. First you need to gain some muscle, muscle is healthy and burns fat, and is sexy. You can have muscles, be a sissy, and be healthy at the same time. I am 130.8 and I do all types of exercises. I did and still do have to work on having this weight, at one time I weighed 160lbs. There are plenty of exercises out there, most important is to find one that you can foreseeably doing for the rest of your life. But all your exercise is nothing without the next part and that is. If nothing else, do some yoga. The benefits to a sissy should be pretty obvious lolLearn to cook and diet: Out of everything in the world, not just sissy, but the world, well not the whole world, actually the first world this should be done. Only in the first world do we have these problems, but that is what you eat. They say "abs are made in the kitchen" for a reason. You can't reward yourself from a hard exercise with a double cheese burger, large fries, and a beer. Find a diet that you can sustain for the remainder of your life. There are so many amazing recipes out there that are healthy and delicious. Stay away from refined sugars, simple carbs, and all those bad foods, use a food app, don't cheat yourself, because that's the only person you are cheating. And learning to be a good cook will certainly make you more desirable for any mate.Celebrate the small victories. Progress can be slow at times, but it is still happening, be sure to acknowledge and internally celebrate. If you see any progress be it lb less on the scale or taking that bigger plug, be happy about the progress, and do not ruin it. Start Today. Anytime I want to make big change, I like to say things like "tomorrow I will", "after this last ...whatever", "when the universe gives me a sign." Those are only excuses I give myself to not do something. You don't have to do everything today, but start with something. Got super high and mas drunk sense I started so this may not make sense nos more

I also used sites like these which were super helpful http://sissy-university.com/ and https://sissylover.com/sissy-school/

My Goddess thinks I may be over explaining lol

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kpop---scenarios · 4 years

Text

Lost In The Stars (6)

Warning: Violence

Word Count: 1.5

A/N: I'm sorry it's shitty, I tried. Lol

“What the actual fuck" Hoseok hissed as he replied his managers words through his head. He couldn’t understand what went through that girls head, other than she was clearly delusional. Hours ago she had just been here trying to sell that story to him and he called her out on her lies. So what was the motive here?

“She was just here” you chimed in. “A few hours ago, trying to tell Hoseok he was the father". His managers eyes went wide.

“Why didn’t you tell me! I’m supposed to handle this shit so it doesn’t get out like this"

“I didn’t tell you because I had thought I handled it. If she is pregnant, I’m not the father. I didn’t sleep with her. “ Hoseok explains. “I thought I got rid of her when I called her out on this bullshit.”

“Well you didn’t. I need to do some serious damage control" he sighs, answering his phone with an angry Hello. Walking up to Hoseok, you wrap your arms around him as you hear your phone buzzing non stop. You bury your head into his neck as you let out a small groan of frustration. What now? You drag your feet to the side table to pick up your phone. Opening it up, you’re astonished at the amount of texts, calls and mentions you had received. Most of the messages were from your friends and family, asking you what you had gotten yourself into and if everything was true. Confused you opened your twitter account, only to see your name being dragged through the mud because of two tweets, from one lying psychotic bitch.

Your stomach sank as you read the things these people who didn’t know you were saying. You hadn’t done anything wrong, but you were a nobody, so who would believe you?

“Hoseok..” you whisper, scrolling through the mounds of hateful messages. He walks over to you, just before you drop your phone. He grabs it, only reading maybe one tweet before tossing it aside and embracing you.

“I’m so sorry. I’m sorry. I’ll fix this. I promise” Hoseok whispers in your ear.

As much as you want to believe him, you’re not sure if he will be able to fix this problem.

A few hours later, you’re laying in your bed, scrolling through your phone, looking at all the tweets that are still being posted about you. Your heart hurts as you read them, you’re not that person. You would never wreck a relationship had they actually been in one. Hoseok had left, his manager wanting him to meet with a PR person to come up with a statement to release about the whole situation. You glance at the time on your phone, seeing it was almost 10pm and you knew Hoseok would be home much later, you decided to just close your eyes and try to dream about something else, anything else but this nightmare that you were currently living. A few hours later, you’re awoken by the sound of things crashing in the living room. You sit up in your bed, your heart racing as you hope its Hoseok just being angry.

Getting out of your bed, you slowly creep to your door, opening it slightly hoping to see whoever it was through a crack in your door. Unfortunately you had no such luck with seeing anyone, so you sneak out of your room, quietly creeping down the hallway. As you peak around the corner you see an unknown man standing in the living room, his body shaking seemingly with rage. Before you can creep back into your room to lock the door, he spins around, locking eyes with you. Even from a good distance away you can see the rage in them, the darkness. You gasp as you turn to run back to your room. He acts quickly chasing after you. You get to your room, but not in time before he grabs a fist full of your hair, yanking you back towards him, wrapping his arm around your neck. You fight as he drags you back to the living room, his arm tightening around your neck making it hard to breathe. Once in the living room, he releases you, tossing you to the floor with a hard thud.

“What do you want!” You cry, your arm aching from landing on it funny.

“What do I want?” he chuckles. “I want you to suffer for what you did to my beloved Mia. How dare you take her babies father away from her.” He snaps.

“I didn’t! They were never together. It’s not even his child, if she is even pregnant" you yell.

The man chuckles. “She would never lie about that. She’s amazing and truthful, unlike you, you lying slut" he snaps, stomping towards you. He brings his leg back, swiftly kicking you in the stomach. You gasp for air, as he knocked the wind out of you while also hitting your ribs. “You’re going to pay for what you did to her. And I’m not going to be the only one to do something to you.” He bends over, grabbing your by the hair again, your scalp tender from before.

He yanks you up, facing him, bringing his hand back, he slaps you hard across the face. Your tears falling from your eyes as your cheek burns from the hit.

“I didn’t do anything" you sob. He brings his hand back again, ready for another hit. Before he manages to land one, you bring your knee up, connecting with his stomach causing him to falter back, bending over to catch his breath. You take this chance to run to your room but he recovers quicker than you expected, running after you. You make it into your room, he slams the door open with his shoulder before you get a chance to close the door fully. Diving, he grabs a hold of your ankle, pulling you to the floor, making you hit your head on the hard floor. The man shimmies his way on top of you, raising a fist this time, landing a blow on your face, almost knocking you out.

The man lands a few more hits and kicks to your stomach. You hear and feel your ribs breaking for sure, something now not right inside you. You cry out in agony, praying for Hoseok to get home soon in your head. Like magic your prayers are answered as you hear Hoseok’s voice calling for you from the living room. Hoseok's stomach sinks as he looks around the room at the broken glass on the floor.

“Help!” he hears you scream. He quickly runs to your room, seeing a man ontop of you. Hoseok grabs the man by the back collar of his jacket, pulling him off of you in one quick motion.

“What the fuck do you want” he growls.

“Justice for Mia you piece of shit" the man snaps, trying to fight his way out of Hoseok’s hold.

“Y/N, call the cops" Hoseok yells. You do your best to scramble your way to your phone, still laying on the side of your bed, your body in so much pain. With shakey hands, you unlock your phone, quickly dialing 1330. “

1330, what’s your emergency?” the woman asks.

“S-someone broke into my apartment” you stutter and cry.

“Are you injured? Do you need an ambulance? What’s your address ” she asks.

“Yes, I think I have a few broken ribs” you cry, your body feeling weak, you’re out of breath and dizzy. “My address is.. *your address* “Officers are on the way” she tells you.

“is there anyone with you?”

“My.. my boyfriend just got home and has him pinned down" you say, trying to keep your mind right and your eyes open.

“They’re almost there, stay with me" she says.

You wheeze into the phone. “I think.. I think I’m going to…” you say, passing out before you can finish. Before Hoseok can react, he hears yelling from the living room, the police had finally arrived.

“In here” he yells. The officers come into the room, Hoseok releases the man as the police handcuff the man, yanking him up. The paramedics rush in with a stretcher, loading you up swiftly. Hoseok doesn’t care about anything but you, leaving the mess for later or the cleaning ladies. Hoseok holds your hand the entire the entire time, his head leaning against your hands as he whispers quiet apologies to you, regretting that he wasn’t there to help you or protect you. They rush you into the hospital, the doctors rushing to you immediately. They quickly examine you.

“She has massive internal bleeding and a punctured lung. We need to get her into surgery now" the doctor yells, pulling you away from Hoseok and begind doors he wasn’t allowed to enter. Hoseok sinks to the ground, his heart breaking. This was all his fault. He put you in this danger by being stupid and not admitting his feels for you when he knew they were there.

Now you were facing emergency surgery and he couldn’t do anything to help you. The only thing he could do, was take down Mia. And there was no doubt about it, he was going to destroy her.

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fontofmercy-archived · 5 years

Text

Understanding BvS’s Lex Luthor: CSA and Repressed Homosexuality

(Re-posted with minor revisions after I moved accounts and accidentally deleted this post)

Lex’s motivations are quite explicit in BvS, he has a whole speech explaining why he is doing what he’s doing and what he says is consistently shown throughout his screentime. But I think there is a lot unspoken beneath the surface that most people wouldn’t think of, based on my observations I think that BvS’s Lex was molested by his father and that he’s sexually attracted to Clark, and that his issues with Superman partially stem from the duality of desiring Clark and being afraid of him. That may sound strange, especially the csa bit, but hear me out because there is quite a bit of evidence and it may give you a clearer perspective on the character.

NOTE: I just want to clarify that it is not at all my intention to equate homosexuality with CSA nor demonize CSA survivors, I’m simply observing this particular character who happens to be a villain. Lex being attracted to Clark doesn’t make him villainous, the way he deals with it because of trauma and internalized homophobia is the problem.

1.) Daddy’s Abominations?

“No man in the sky intervened when I was a boy to save me from daddy’s fists and abominations!”

This is quite self-explanatory, Lex just said that his father sexually abused him. The only other possible interpretation I could think of is a more general ‘my dad made me evil because he was evil’ but that’s a really weak explanation especially since the line is equated with the trauma of being beaten by his dad and the way he is very visibly triggered saying that line. When he finishes “abominations” he immediately flinches away from Superman and shakes his hand in front of his face as if desperately trying to erase what he just confessed.

2.) Lolita + Alice in Wonderland

“Plain Lo in the morning, Lola is slacks -“

“Late, late says the white rabbit”

Lolita and Alice in Wonderland...those are interesting choices of literature for a supervillain to quote. You’d think something more threatening and/or pretentious would be an obvious choice for a traditional mastermind-type supervillain rather than two obscure (not very masculine) classics that only have one thing in common: themes of sexual obsession and pedophilia.

Lolita is the story of a pedophile who uses his power as a step-father to groom and sexually abuse a child. Alice in Wonderland, while not having explicit pedophilic content, was written by a suspected pedophile and is obsessively focused on a child that there are photographs of the author kissing on the mouth. These are the two novels Lex relates to enough to quote them casually off the top of his head.

3.) The “it’s cherry” scene

So this is obviously a sexual innuendo but the question is, why this guy? This character is utterly unimportant on his own and this doesn’t affect anything plot-wise which means this action is entirely about characterizing Lex. What are they trying to communicate here? This guy represents a figure similar to Lex’s father, an older businessman who behaved as if he had authority over Lex, and Lex’s instinct to that is to assert dominance in a sexually suggestive manner. This establishes Lex as a character who uses sexuality to dominate and make others uncomfortable, and relates it to a man who who represents his father.

4.) Two Versions Of The Same Scene

Lex caressing Zod’s face directly parallels him caressing around Clark’s face, even the framing is identical. I think these are two versions of Lex confronting Superman, one with the actual Superman where he has to keep his distance and put on a callous front, and the other with a Kryptonian corpse he can project Superman onto. The scene with Zod I think shows how Lex truly feels about Clark. “You flew too close to the sun” he’s saying this and crying as he’s creating a monster to kill Clark which makes me think those words were not for Zod but the god he feels he has to kill. There’s no reason for Lex to cry for Zod, Lex has no relationship with him, it’s much more coherent that this scene is using Zod’s body as a substitute for what Lex can’t express to the real Superman.

EDIT: Upon rewatch I noticed a small moment where the Jolly Rancher Dude (I don’t think he has a name lol?) says with a smile “You want Zod’s body?” and Lex goes “Okay”, it’s a very playful interaction and it I think strengthens the connection between Zod’s body being an implied sex symbol of Superman.

4.5.) The Sexual Tension In The Rooftop Scene

Every moment of the rooftop scene (and all of this film) is so multilayered and intense, I could talk about it for hours but I want to talk a little more about the moment in the above gif.

Seconds before this, Lex was wagging his fingers inches for Superman’s glowing laser eyes but now when he knows Clark isn’t going to attack him, he won’t touch him? Lex is less afraid of having his fingers burned off than he is to touch Clark’s head knowing that he won’t do anything. Because Lex would be happy if Superman burned him, that would prove him right and give him an easy category to put Clark in but letting himself touch Clark in an ‘affectionate’ manner is terrifying.

A straight male villain that just wanted to use physical contact to assert dominance over the hero would have touched Clark here (and also would have no reason to caress Zod’s dead body) but Lex can’t even though he’s literally trembling with desire to and we know for a fact he’s not afraid of invading Clark’s personal space in an even more physically dangerous moment.

5.) The Dual Realities Of An Abused Child

“If God is all good then he cannot be all powerful.”

Now, I’m not an expert in psychology but I will do my best to articulate this. When someone, especially a child, is abused by someone they love it creates an extreme paradox in their mind. They love this person and they have to trust them but they also have to fear them, their brains are forced to compartmentalize when this person is a threat vs when they are a protector. In some cases, like Lex’s, this can lead to someone entirely thinking in absolutes and dualities.

It’s a consistent theme in Lex’s dialogue that he thinks in absolutes. The cornerstone of his ideology is people have to be “all good” or “all powerful” when really no one is either, there arguably is no such thing as either.

It’s also a theme that he has dual views of people in his life, the most prominent being his father and Superman. In one scene he’s reminiscing about wishing his dad would come back, in another he’s emotionally describing the abuse he inflicted. And Lex does the same with Clark as explained in point 4.

Lex even seems to have a dual view of himself. In the rooftop scene he points to himself as “the evil in the world” but his speech about Prometheus at the party is clearly meant to illustrate that he sees himself as a misunderstood savior of humanity (this is even confirmed in the bonus material).

6.) Internalized Homophobia

“I don’t hate the sinner, I hate the sin.”

Two things are important to me with this line. First is that it reinforces point 5 but also this is a very, very common phrase in homophobic rhetoric so for him to say this and gesture to Clark’s body as the “sin” has implications. And yes, yes, I know he meant that Clark’s powers are a sin but things can have double meanings and I sincerely doubt that anyone making a movie in the western world’s current political climate wouldn’t realize that phrase is strongly linked to homophobia.

To elaborate on how it reinforces 5: Lex is openly saying that he doesn’t hate Clark, he just hates his power, which brings us back to the idea of an abuse victim’s dual reality. It’s Clark’s power that is the threat to him but he can still love Clark, same way his father’s abuse was a threat but he can still love his father. Note: Lex calls Clark “my friend” and “Clark Joe” and similar affectionate names throughout their interactions which I think suggests that Lex sees Clark as partially a person.

7.) Conclusion

DCEU’s Lex Luthor was a fresh, contemporary take on the character so it was a jarring difference from the Lex we’ve seen in other recent mainstream media. I also think it was upsetting partially because it took away Lex as a male power fantasy; a buff, suave billionaire who’s hyper masculine and doesn’t let anything get to him including his canonical abuse. Now we’ve got this definitely charming and silver-tongued but effeminate and deeply traumatized Lex that I think is much, much more dynamic and compelling (and definitely fits this universe) but was uncomfortable for people that were attached to the charecter as a male power fantasy.

Nevertheless we need more villains like this. That can be both intimidating and vulnerable, that are human and offer a real ideological opposition to the hero. BvS could not have been the story it is without this Lex. BvS is a brilliant and nuanced film about how fear and trauma affects people’s worldviews, which is an important thing to explore when you have a Superhero that is the embodiment of hope. It’s important to show that not everyone can have hope so easily and to humanize those people.

Anyways this post is really long and I could literally talk for days about DCEU and this film especially so thanks for reading, please be respectful in the notes.

#dc #pro dceu #dceu positivity #bvs positivity #batman v superman #dc meta #my meta #lex luthor #lex luthor jr #clex #clark x lex #txt #my post

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bigskydreaming · 4 years

Text

@lwoorl

indigo-glasto Fuente: bigskydreaming so what you're saying is next time i write dick under the influence of fesr gas i should make him see himself killing his family or maybe just believing that if someone touches him they'll die and then running away from everyone so they dont get hurt noted

Copying your tags for this post since they spell out one of the exact scenarios I default to for this, lol.

I mean, pretty much the latter is how I tend to view it, yeah. Like, I think when he was still growing up, there was a lot more variation and he saw y’know, people falling, or various villains that had been responsible for his traumas, like a lot of other people do under the influence of fear gas. But by the time he’s an adult, most specifically at any point after Blockbuster/Chemo, I think this pattern has recurred enough in his life that its kinda crystallized as what I laid out there. And so as an adult, I think his standard reaction to fear gas is like....a fucked up game of Keep-Away, where he’s desperately intent on getting and staying as far away as possible from his family, friends, innocents, etc....until the effects of the gas wear off.

Problem is, without having the specifics of what Dick’s seeing and why he’s reacting the way he is....its absolutely understandable that the rest of the Batfam, based on their own various reactions to fear gas, would likely assume that he’s running away from them because the fear gas is twisting how he sees them. They assume he’s viewing various villains or dangers in their place, and that’s what he’s running away from. So it might simply just not occur to them that he’s the threat, the danger, the problem that has to be isolated....to protect everyone else.

Something somewhat tangential to this, but still related, is the fact that there’s canon references to Dick having at one point been a candidate for Hal’s Green Lantern ring. And a central part of the Green Lantern mythos is that Green Lanterns aren’t chosen because they don’t feel or experience fear, have nothing they’re afraid of....rather, they’re chosen for their ability to overcome fear, to not be motivated or driven by it.

So in a way, I still see that as somewhat relevant to Dick’s characterization here.....because obviously Dick has fears, beyond just what I’ve outlined in my headcanons here...but to me it makes a certain kind of sense that like Green Lanterns, Dick’s primary response to fear gas isn’t even just a reaction/him being motivated by fear itself.....his reaction is the bone-deep desperation to protect people from what it is he fears....himself.

And theoretically, this opens up a lot of opportunities to explore his character and his relationships with the rest of his family in other ways too. For instance, all it really requires is one occasion where one of his family, while pursuing him to try and contain him or give him an antidote, ends up in the right place at the right time to hear him say something or react to them in just the specific right way - that it clarifies for them that all these times, he’s not running away from them because he sees them as a threat to him, he’s running away because he sees himself as a threat to them.

Because suddenly that casts a whole lot of other things that they tend to assume about him in a totally different light. For instance, various characters in canon often point out his constant relocations, especially right after a trauma, crisis or conflict of some kind, and condemn this as his habit of ‘running away from his problems.’ But looked at through the lens of ‘he views himself as the problem, the single common denominator at the root of all these various traumas/conflicts that hurt others as much if not more than him (in his POV)’.....and suddenly everything flips. Because if Dick’s true greatest fear is that he himself is the problem in everyone’s lives, the thing that doesn’t fit, the gum in the works.....then his constant relocations aren’t him running away from his problems, they’re him running away from whomever he thinks he’s a problem for.

Its always struck me as odd that people so habitually refer to Dick as a people person and someone who seeks and takes comfort from others, being surrounded by people he cares about.....and yet default to viewing every time he isolates himself from those very same people as somehow an inherently selfish act (ie ‘running away from his problems instead of facing them like an adult’).

That doesn’t really track to me, because if being surrounded and comforted by people he loves and values is what’s ideal for him, what he truly needs or craves....then how does removing himself from their presence so many of the times he’s hurt or traumatized or struggling....make things better for him? IMO, it doesn’t....its just I don’t think that’s what’s actually driving his thought processes at those times, what he’s prioritizing. He’s doing it because he’s more focused on doing what he thinks is best for them.

And to be clear, I’m not suggesting all of this as evidence that Dick is just so inherently noble or more selfless than other characters and blah blah blah, lol, since that kinda would defeat the whole point of that post I made yesterday about how I’m not a super-fan of emphasizing his innate goodness as like, what ‘defines’ him.

All of this, to me, has just as much to do with a lack of self-esteem/insecurity about himself and his own worth comparative to what he feels his loved ones deserve. If you look at the pattern of Dick’s conflicts with his family and friends over the years too, in addition to this, one of the most common denominators that pops out there is that a huge underlying source of conflict for him.....is literally just...his insecurity about how they see/value him, his place in their eyes/lives.

Him not knowing where he stands with them, basically, and so defaulting to assuming the worst and operating based off that assumption. Hence why Dick equates the two times Bruce didn’t want him as Robin anymore as being the same thing as Bruce not wanting him around at all, Dick’s need for a tangible sign of how Bruce views him via an official adoption, how he retreats when family or friends he’s reached out repeatedly to keep rejecting his help or contact....its not necessarily ‘sulking’ so much as insecurity as to whether their rejection stems from not seeing him or his help/contact as worth anything, etc.

Dick, IMO, is someone who deep-down values being needed, just, in any way. Like, I think he’s literally internalized that as being a big part of his purpose, or just his very reason for existing. He doesn’t see a scenario, a life path for him that isn’t about helping other people....being of help to other people....because you gotta remember, this is a guy who since his literal formative years as a child, has defined himself by his vigilantism, by his service to others, his protection and guardianship of others.

But the inevitable flip side of that, to me, is that when he doesn’t see any indication that his help is wanted or needed or valued by the people he most wants to value it, the people he most wants his presence to be a help to.....that’s when he starts to flounder, to spiral....because it makes him doubt what he’s even doing there...and if he’s even wanted there, or should even be there. And when nothing changes or something else happens to make him conclude that he shouldn’t be there, that he’s become more hindrance than help.....he goes elsewhere.

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stories-you-wont-hear · 5 years

Text

– precedence. pt 1

hey everybody! it’s ya girl! back at it again! with a new story! in lieu of the final part of due process! i swear it is slowly coming together, but i want to be able to do justice to the characters in the story and give them an ending that’s neither cotton candy and butterflies nor... slushy snow and subway rats (does my idea of the bad end of things give away where i’m from lol).

aNyWaY here is part one to what will mostly likely be a mini series/prequel to due process in which we find out why y/n is the way she is and how billy came into her life.

bear in mind that this is the same reader from due process, but i don’t think you have to read due process to understand things here, however certain characters will cross over. i hope you all enjoy this, and please give me love! it is so difficult to find motivation to write things when no one pays any attention. i know i write for myself, and for the fun of it, but it can be tough TT enjoy! xoxo mira

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There was a special place in hell for the person who decided Latin would be so heavily incorporated into the American legal system. Was English not enough? You secretly figured the people who set up this whole shebang got into a pissing contest with each other and resorted to using fancy Latin phrases to try and one up each other, and as a result, you were sitting at your desk and poring over legal Latin phrases.

You were not about to be the next associate fired for fudging up Latin in a brief that ended up being presented in court by a senior partner, who got an earful from the judge and ended up losing the hearing on a matter of technical wording. That day had been about two weeks ago and since then, every single associate at your firm, Wesley King Randall, had been brushing up on terminology.

Every free moment was spent scanning through reference books and a study guide someone had made, and all that was saying a lot since associates at any big law firm barely had time to breathe. From the corner of your eye, you saw one of the name partners making their way towards the area where the associates were situated and you quickly slipped the papers you had been studying from into your bag and turned to the papers on research about property law. Apparently not everyone had sensed the shift in the air as several other associates still had out their Latin books.

“Didn’t you bumbling toddlers learn what mens rea means in whatever law school your daddies bought your way into?” the woman said as she walked through the playpen of associates, causing a wave of frazzled yuppies to quickly shut their books and turn towards the woman who would fire each and every one of them without a moment’s hesitation.

“A guilty mind,” one particular young associate said. Big mistake.

“Is that what your copy of Legalese for Dummies says?” she replied, eyes piercing through the man who had had the audacity to reply to her. The poor kid was now probably kicking himself for not interning at Landman and Zack. You sucked in your breath, unsure what his fate would be until another man walked towards the bullpen area.

“Eva, you came to choose an associate, not to choose a lamb to slaughter,” Richard Wesley said, his teeth sparkling as he came in, shaking his head as if to admonish the woman with whom he shared the name of the firm.

“It’s not my fault they’re all sheep,” she replied back bitterly, her mood seeming to worsen with the addition of her colleague.

“How about Monty?” Richard suggested, gesturing towards William Montgomery Jr., who immediately stood up when his name was called. “I’d prefer someone who won’t call me a frigid bitch behind me back, Dick,” Eva deflected. Monty's face immediately reddened as Eva reiterated the words he had used to describe her last week at an associate's happy hour outing.

"The walls have ears, Mr. Montgomery," Eva cautioned, her eyes scanning the faces of the associates, who were all probably trying to hide either their fear or their contempt of the female third of the law firm.

Eva King was many things. She was poised, she was ruthless, and she did not give a shit what people thought of her. And now, Eva King was looking directly at you. "You," she said, and you immediately rose up, hand reaching for your bag without a word as she beckoned for you. Eva turned to leave without so much as another word, but you caught the look Richard Wesley was giving the rest of the associates, namely the male associates in front of him.

It was a look that was meant to pacify them. It wasn't that they weren’t worthy, Eva chose you because you were a woman. At least, that's what those man-babies would tell themselves as they nursed top shelf liquor tonight after work. It was the same reason why Richard Wesley doubted your ability even though you had just wrangled a property case for him just last month.

"I don't have time to coddle you," Eva said as you followed her through the firm, heading for the elevator. "I don't need you to," you replied, stepping into the enclosed space behind her. "That's what I like to hear," she said, granting you a look that was probably as close to warm as she could get.

"You were the one who figured out that clever little loophole in the Grant case will, weren't you?" she asked after a moment of silence. You attempted to pull back at the grin that wanted to pop up on your face, it was the very case Richard Wesley had taken as a favor for an old family friend, making sure that man would get every pretty penny from his grandmother's will. It was also the case that some second year associate had gotten the credit for just because he was being groomed for Wesley's good old boy club. Yet, Eva King knew what you had done. You had barely had a conversation since you started here three years ago, but she knew about you.

"Yes," you replied, hoping your faux indifferent tone was masking the fact that you were internally jumping for joy. "Don't be humble," Eva insisted, "Every goddamn thing you do here, you write your name in big bold letters on. You don't do that and some ass with a trust fund is going to write his own name on it." You attempted to take in her words as the elevator dinged, marking your arrival to the third and most prestigious floor of the firm.

The desk at reception was marked with the names of the partners in silver lettering and the woman behind it stood up as the both of you stepped off the elevator. "Mr. Russo from Anvil is already waiting in your office, Ms. King," the receptionist called as Eva brushed past her. "Of course he is," Eva muttered under her breath, heading towards her office.

"Stay sharp," was all that Eva supplied before she stepped into her office to find the man you presumed to be Mr. Russo going through the books she had arranged on the bookshelf behind her couch. You could've sworn that her office was probably just as big as your apartment, her desk facing away from the lounge area each name partner had in their office. Eva's was tastefully done, and was as chic as she was. "I think this Camus guy is pretty bleak, don't ya think?" were his first words as he turned towards the two of you, holding up a copy of The Stranger. "Sorry, I'll have Forrest Gump playing for you the next time you visit, Mr. Russo," Eva responded.

The man, who you couldn't help but ogle, was dressed impeccably in a suit you had worked long enough at this firm to know was worth your entire month's paycheck. "Billy Russo," he said, putting the book back on the shelf to step towards you, his movements precise as he offered his hand to you. You shook it, hoping you weren't still ogling him. "Y/N Y/L/N," you supplied.

"Have a seat, Mr. Russo, Y/N," Eva chimed, waiting until the both of you sat before she took a seat a few feet from you on the couch. "What's going on, Russo?" she asked almost immediately. Eva certainly did not beat around the bush, even with clients. "How I love your hospitality," Billy commented with a chuckle. "Can I get you anything?" Eva said exasperatedly.

"Just some fine legal counsel," Billy quipped back as you looked between the two of them. You had always seen Eva as a powerhouse, not taking shit from anyone, but this kind of exchange was almost like banter. You were seeing a new side of her.

"Well, it's a good thing you came to a law firm, isn't it?" Eva shot back, but this time with the tiniest of smiles. "I hear you lot are pretty decent, any truth to that?" he said, this time directing his playful quip at you. "That suit you're wearing isn't cheap, and neither are we," you responded.

"I like her," Billy said, turning to face Eva, who was nodding at you with a look of approval. "So do I," she began, avoiding eye contact with you as she said so, "And she's right. So we can keep making small talk for as long as you want, Billy." Billy smirked, and you knew he had the pockets to keep you and Eva here all day if he wanted. You certainly didn't mind the view.

"What was that joke?" Billy began, "What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer? A bad lawyer can drag a case out for a year and a good lawyer..." "A good lawyer can make it last even longer," you offered. "Bingo!" Billy grinned. Eva's expression turned to one of weariness, and you cleared your throat, not wanting her to regret her choice.

"Sorry, Eva," Billy sighed, "I just can't help myself around beautiful women." His grin was wide as he leaned back against the arm chair he had chosen to sit in, and suddenly his face clicked. You had seen him in the papers and perhaps once or twice in the office on the rare occasion you had to visit the third floor. He was the CEO of some private military firm and had deep enough pockets to keep Wesley King Randall on as legal counsel. "Try," Eva replied dryly.

Billy's entire demeanor changed within seconds, sitting up and dropping the grin in exchange for an intense look as he pointed towards the file on the coffee table. "This is a contract that I made with a domestic company to provide accommodations to my men out in Iraq. They're set to go weeks from now, and then this son of-" Eva cleared her throat, raising her brow at him as she leafed through the papers. "Sorry," Billy mumbled, before shaking his head as if to clear his thoughts.

"Now they're telling me they can't provide me the service, and I've got men going out there with no place to go," he continued. "They called you and told you that?" Eva asked, her eyes scanning the pages in front of her. "Yeah, the guy didn't even have the balls to tell it to my face. Let me tell you what I would've done if he had had the gall to walk into my office and tell me that." "Please," Eva cut in again, "If it's not legal, don't tell me." Billy sighed, shrugging his shoulders a bit. He looked tense, his concern for the people who worked for him apparent.

"Fair enough," he sighed. "I just don't want my men out in the cold." You nodded sympathetically, eyes turning to Eva who had set the contract back down on the table. "Does this have anything to do with the fact that the wife of this company's CEO was the one you were laying it on at the gala last weekend? she asked coolly. Billy froze, the epiphany he was having drawing a a slow nod as Eva spoke. "I didn't know that was her!" he cried, "And I can't help it if my natural state of being is pure charm." Eva scoffed, and even you couldn't help but chuckle in reply to that comment.

"What am I supposed to do now? Wait until my men are out there without so much as a roof over their heads?" he said, turning back into serious Billy.

"It's an anticipatory breach," you spoke up, looking up at Billy. Eva nodded in agreement, her eyes on you as you spoke. "You don't have to wait to take legal action until they actually breach the contract. He already told you that they can't honor their part of the agreement. That in turn will affect your ability to complete the job your company was hired for. They could be held liable not just for what you paid them, but for the entire contract."

Billy turned to look back at Eva, who sat up straight, her expression unable to hide the fact that she was pleased with you. "That's right," she agreed, "We can hold them as liable before they actually breach. Do you have proof that he called and stated that on the phone?" Billy nodded, explaining that he'd need to get the recording of the call from the secretary who kept those sort of logs.

"Great," Eva said, standing up to follow Billy's movements as you did the same. "Get that to me and I'll have his head on a platter for you," she said as she began to walk him out. "Thank you, Eva," Billy said, tipping his head in thanks. "And thank you, Y/N," he said with one of those smiles. "It's my job, Mr. Russo," you replied. With that, he was off and you wondered if Eva wanted you in her office as she had taken a seat at her desk.

"Should I-" you began until she gestured for you to take a seat across from her. "You did good," she praised, and for a moment, you wondered if you were in a dream. Eva King, the woman who all the associates called an ice queen, was praising you while you sat in her office. "But you have to be the best," she continued, her eyes set on you. You tried to maintain eye contact, but her gaze was too intense and your eyes dropped to your lap. "I'm serious, Y/N, you have potential," she said, a bit gentler this time. You nodded, thanking her for the opportunity as you sensed it was time for you to return to your regular old cubicle three floors down. "And," Eva called as you got to the door, "Next time don't make it so obvious that you're ogling him."

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and boom! so that was mainly to introduce the story and the characters and of course, billy. let me know what you think and i hope to have the next part of this as well as the last part to due process out soon. much love, mira

#stories-you-wont-hear #stories: precedence #billy russo x reader #billy russo imagine #billy russo fanfic #billy russo fic #reader x billy russo

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