#or just in general that I’ll say something that will make me seem cruel or ignorant about the situation

[raybutani]

I have gotten a few anon asks with people’s feelings re: Israel. I am not equipped to, nor do I desire to engage in conversations or debates about it.

Every time there is major global unrest in the news, I come back to this poem. This is how I’m feeling.

#I feel heart-pounding anxiety that some anonymous internet stranger is going to send me hate #or just in general that I’ll say something that will make me seem cruel or ignorant about the situation #these are the kinds of trivial worries I get to have while people are being killed and terrorized #and it’s just awful #I do not deserve this comfy life more than anybody else #poetry #ilya kaminsky #israel

[munsonslove]

Open Drawers

(18+ only)

summary: You forget to close the drawer to your nightstand and your best friend accidentally finds your vibrator.

wordcount: 4.3k

tags/warnings: fem!reader, slight softdom!eddie, friends to lovers, smut, use of sex toys, praise kink (good girl), very slight degradation (he calls you a slut once), pet names (sweetheart, princess), spit used as lubricant, edging, overstim, no use of y/n

a/n: i teased this fic a while ago, sorry it took me a bit to actually post it but i hope you like it anyway!! requests are open and much appreciated, if i know someones actively waiting for me to write something for them i’ll be more likely to not spend a whole ass month on it lmao

It’s been weeks of torture. Ever since Eddie found out about your ‘little secret’ he’s refused to let it go, bringing it up as often as he can just to humiliate you further. It was cruel behavior, especially from the man you consider your best friend. Though you can’t be too surprised, considering he’d always had an affection for teasing you. In the past it had always been rather playful and innocent- maybe just ever so slightly suggestive- but you were generally able to ignore his flirtatious comments and retain your close relationship (no matter how much they made your pining heart flutter). It had been almost a month since everything changed.

Nobody was home when you returned from your shift, and inspecting the refrigerator revealed a note left to you from your roommates stating that they would be gone for the rest of the night. The news was passed along through phone call to your best friend before you even changed out of your work clothes, and within the hour Eddie had arrived at your door with a six-pack of beer and a relaxed grin. He entered without knocking (having been given a spare key from the day you moved in) and found you sprawled out on the couch, movie just starting with a large bowl of popcorn already made. You don’t even bother sparing him a glance up as he kisses the crown of your head before plopping down directly on top of you.

You try and fail to kick him off. Admittedly you may have been able to muster more strength for the task if you hadn’t been laughing at his typical antics. Failure becomes even more set in stone when his hands find their way to your sides and you dramatically call out “uncle, uncle!” in hopes that he will mercifully cease his relentless tickling. Thankfully, he does seem to be feeling benevolent this evening and climbs off, allowing you to sit up as he takes his place next to you. After ripping a can from its plastic rings, you pop open the tab and take a sip while Eddie grabs fistfulls of popcorn and shoves them into his mouth with a total lack of manners. You conclude that something is definitely wrong with you for finding this somehow endearing, and you gaze at him longingly until he turns to you with a mock-disgruntled eye roll. 

“John Hughes?”, he complains, mouth still half full, “Can’t we watch something else?”

You smirk at his predictability. “I knew we wouldn’t make it past the opening scene,” you respond while tsk-ing at him and shaking your head. “I rented a couple of cheesy looking b-movies just yesterday. You know, slasher flicks that for sure spent all their budget on fake blood?”

He smiles big and jumps up off of the sofa. “Aw, my favorite! You do love me!” he exclaims with sarcastic sentiment, “You remember to stash the tapes somewhere your thief roommates couldn’t find?”

“First of all, stop calling my friends thieves. That was one time,” you say while slapping lightly at his leg from your lowered position, “And second, yeah. They’re next to my bed.”

He nods and heads to your bedroom, not wasting time to ask permission seeing as after so many years you both had developed a ‘me casa es su casa’ type of unspoken agreement. After a few more sips of your beer and picking at a partially popped kernel, you notice that Eddie is taking an unusual amount of time retrieving the tapes. You were sure that you had left them on your nightstand, you even remember seeing them while in bed this morning as you were reaching over to-

Oh. Fuck.

The can drops from your hand and falls to the floor, spilling light amber liquid onto the hardwood. Rushing into your room, you see Eddie standing in front of the drawer you had forgone closing while leaving earlier, looking down into it with a clear view of your 18th birthday present to yourself. He whips around, jaw dropped in shock. There’s an unreadable look in his eyes as he stares you down, and you realize that you have no idea what he’s thinking about. Probably all the new ammunition he now has to use against you during one of your future banter sessions.

You run forward, shoving him sideways onto the bed and slamming the drawer shut. He lands with a huff- his back on the mattress- before propping himself up onto his elbows, still looking at you with that confusing expression. His silence so far is honestly more nerve wracking than him ruthlessly making fun of you would have been.

“I’m so sorry,” you apologize frantically. “I completely forgot I left this open, and I didn’t know we’d be hanging out tonight, and when I sent you in here I didn’t even think about it, and I never want to do anything to make you uncomfortable, and I-”

“Woah, princess,” he cuts off your rambling, using that nickname that he’s been using ever since the two of you met back in school. It usually brought a warmth to your cheeks, but given that you already felt sick to your stomach the sweet moniker was not appreciated. “It’s fine, I promise!”

“Fine?” you cry out, the sound muffled by your palms as your heated face is now buried behind your hands. You turn your body to face away from him, and he pushes back with his arms to sit up the rest of the way, then reaches forward to grip your elbow and spin you back around.

“Yeah, I swear! You didn’t make me uncomfortable or anything,” he consoles. “I was just surprised, is all. I just… wouldn’t have expected… you… to have that.” As he speaks the final word, he gestures to the freshly closed drawer containing your magic wand vibrator. The room falls quiet once more as he stares blankly at the offending table, seemingly lost in thought.

You shove his shoulder a little more harshly than you mean to, and he blinks back to consciousness and rubs where you met contact before re-meeting your eyes. “Don’t look at it like that!” you chastise, ignoring the fact that he technically wasn’t looking at ‘it’ like anything, seeing as it was now hidden out of sight. Your head falls into the cover of your hands yet again as you groan out, “Ugh! You probably think I’m some kind of slut now.”

“N-no!” he’s quick to deny, shaking his head. “Of course I don’t think that about you! I mean, come on, give me some credit. It’s the 80s,” he counters, with emphasis on the last word, “guys can be progressive now. I know girls masturbate too!”

“Please don’t say that word,” you reply, your hands still hiding your face but compromising by peeking out through your fingers.

“What?” he questions with a smirk, “Masturbate?”

“You’re completely impossible,” you state, giving in and dropping your arms to your side. You pick up the videos from your messy nightstand and turn on your heel to walk out the door, not even stopping as you shout out “Are you coming or what, Eds?”

Behind you, Eddie takes the opportunity of your back being turned to adjust himself in his pants and prays that he manages to keep it down throughout the duration of movie night.

That was almost an entire month ago. While Eddie took pity on you for the remainder of that night, the very next morning began his onslaught of mockery. Although, perhaps mockery wasn’t quite the right word, because you know all his jokes were meant to be lighthearted and fun. You know if you told him he was making you uncomfortable that he would stop in a heartbeat, so the real problem you’re facing is that you don’t want him to stop. Every time he shows up unannounced and slyly asks, “I wasn’t interrupting anything, was I?” with that knowing gleam in his eyes, you’re not sure if you want to scold him for his teasing or jump his bones. Him speaking so candidly about something that’s always been so private should be embarrassing- and it is- but it would be dishonest to say the butterflies in your stomach are only there because of your modesty. Truth be told, he was turning you on every time he hinted at the fact that he knows all about your favorite form of self care.

Not only were the teasing comments nonstop, there were also the questions. Eddie was relentlessly curious about the process (which confounded you considering you thought the situation was pretty straightforward) and he never seemed to run out of things he wanted to ask you.

“How long have you had it?”, “How many settings are there?”, “How often do you use it?”, “Do you need it to get off?”, “What do you think about when you use it?” (definitely couldn’t answer that one honestly), and finally, “How exactly do you use it?”

According to him, he wanted to know the ‘right way’ to use one on a girl for future reference. One day, the frustration of constantly having to dodge his incessant questions became too much, and without thinking you blurted out, “If you’re so curious about how to use it, why don’t I just teach you?” Understandably, your outburst shocked the both of you. What shocked you more was when Eddie quickly recovered and excitedly agreed.

That was how you found yourself spread out on your bed with your best friend on his knees in between your thighs. Your most private area is only covered by your hands, and your discarded panties are tucked in Eddie’s back jeans pocket.

“How am I supposed to do this if you’re hiding, princess?” he asks, observing the toy and turning it over in his hands, “Don’t be shy. It’s just me.”

That was the problem. It was him, your friend that you’ve been harboring a secret crush on for years. Now you’re in a position with him that you’ve fantasized about so many times, and you don’t know what it means for the future of your relationship. Above you, Eddie fiddles with the two buttons, figuring out the mechanics of what they do. He discovers the bottom button turns it on while the top changes the speed. There are three settings, and after cycling through them all it starts back at the beginning, only turning off by pressing the bottom button once more. When he’s done figuring out how the toy works, he powers it on to the lowest setting and looks at you expectantly, eyes flitting between your hands and face. You turn your head to the side, take one final deep breath and move your arms to your stomach, revealing yourself to him.

The air is cold on your exposed center. Other than your shaky exhaling and the humming of the vibrator, it’s quiet. You realize with embarrassment that Eddie has stopped breathing, and when you steal a glance back at him he’s staring at your bare center with an unreadable expression. You instinctively hide your face in your hands, and your thighs involuntarily twitch to close. Of course, they can’t fully shut with Eddie sitting in between them, but the movement does stir the boy from his trance. He pries your hands away from your face and you’re forced to confront his inspecting of you.

He kisses a wet peck to the tip of your nose like he’s done so many times before, and just like always your entire face scrunches up with a smile. With eyes now closed, you start to feel giddy and you can’t help but giggle at the absurdity of the situation. You half expect Eddie to start laughing with you, but no sound comes from your friend. Suddenly- and without warning- he presses the vibrator directly to your clit. Your eyes snap open, rolling back in both shock and pleasure as a humiliatingly high pitched squeal escapes out of your slack-jawed mouth.

“Such a pretty sound from such a pretty girl,” Eddie says, barely loud enough to hear considering the buzzing raised in volume due to being pushed up against something. It’s almost like he was more absentmindedly commenting to himself rather than purposefully complimenting you.

You’re only capable of responding with moans as your legs fold into your torso and your toes start to curl. It’s still set to the lowest vibration option, but your aforementioned nerves and arousal were making you much more sensitive than you would otherwise be while using the toy alone. Eddie’s empty hand moves to stroke your inner thigh, before inching toward your center slowly. He seems to be asking permission to touch you himself, and the fact that he still thinks to wait for consent while literally sitting in between your legs after taking off your underwear almost has you laughing again. Instead, you simply nod your head. Eddie’s fingers immediately spread your lips further, allowing the head of the vibrator to be able to hit your clit more directly. The buzzing becomes higher in pitch as he goes up one setting, and the sensation becomes too much to handle.

“Sorry,” he whispers when you whine and start to squirm away, “I’ll be nice.”

After positioning yourself back into place, you mumble out, “Sensitive…” as an explanation. Your voice is surprisingly weak.

“I know, sweetheart,” he says, though you doubt he actually feels regretful, “I know.”

The sound of clicking reaches your ears as Eddie toggles the toy back to the first setting. His thumb briefly brushes over your clit, causing you to shiver and gasp, and he breathes out a quiet laugh before pressing the vibrator against you once more- this time more gently. The vibrations are more bearable this way, and you feel the pleasure slowly start to rise and rise until you become a moaning puddle beneath the metalhead. Just as you’re crying out his name- a warning that you're about to cum- he pulls away, cruelly laughing at your protesting.

“Eds, what the fuck?” you shout, frustratedly. “I was so close! Why the hell would you-”

“Calm down, princess,” he interrupts. “You know I’ll get you there. I just wanna have some fun along the way.”

And you do know. You trust him more than anyone else- you’d trust him with your life- but you also know that he’s a little shit. “Please, Eds. Please just get to it,” you beg.

He stares at the head of the toy for a moment before lifting it to his face. His tongue parts his lips, swollen and pink from him biting them, and your eyes widen as he slowly licks directly where the silicone was just touching you. He moans, and his eyes roll back into his head. The sight only drives you more wild, and your hips start rocking the bed as you wait for him to continue.

He starts to bite his lips again as he watches you grind against nothing, desperately searching for friction. “Maybe I was wrong before,” he says slowly with a teasing lilt, “maybe you are a slut.” He had a look in his eyes that you had never seen before.

Your entire body raises in temperature. “Eddie…” you whine, surprised by how much his rudeness is affecting you. “Please…”

“So fucking wet, dripping all over your sheets,” he continues distractedly, paying no mind to your pleading as he caressed up and down your slit, collecting your juices. When he pulls away, you notice the lights of your bedroom reflecting off the glistening moisture on his fingers, and you resist the urge to hide again. “Such a pretty pussy. The prettiest. She’s not used to being treated so nicely, huh?”

As usual, his confidence blurs the line between incredibly sexy and incredibly annoying. His words are making your insides flutter, and probably worsening the ‘dripping all over your sheets’ problem. Still, you can’t help but feel your frustration grow. “Please, Eds, make me cum. Please make me cum,” you beg some more as you scoot down the bed. Your thighs no longer have the room to be laying on either side of him. Instead, they are now resting atop his own thighs, with your pelvises almost meeting making contact.

“So desperate for your best friend to make you cum. Are you always this wet, princess?” As he asks this, the vibrator meets your center again. He rubs it back and forth vertically in quick motions, and you groan in relief.

You answer by shaking your head no. It definitely wasn’t always like this. In fact, it was never like this. The toy slid so effortlessly between your puffy lips, massaging your sensitive nub directly and bringing tears to your eyes.

“Aw,” he cooed, “so it’s just for me?”

As embarrassed as you feel, you figure there’s no use in denying it now. “J- just for you.”

That familiar feeling of climax starts to creep up on you once more, and once more you cry out in annoyance when Eddie eases up the pressure before pulling off entirely.

“No!” you sob, “Eddie please, I need it so bad.”

“You’ll cum when I’m ready for you to cum,” he says, though the dominance in his tone is betrayed by the lust in his eyes. “I just want to play with you for a little longer. You’ll be a good girl, right?”

You suspect that he won’t start up again until you agree, so you do so without a second thought. “I’ll be your good girl,” you promise, “I’ll be good.”

He smiles wide at you before spreading your lips apart and leaning down to spit directly in between them, not that you needed the extra lubrication. Feeling his saliva make contact sent shockwaves through your body, and your back arched just in time for him to harshly press the vibrator back to your clit and start rubbing it in fast circles. This time, the orgasm doesn’t so much creep up on you as it does jump out in front of you, and you’re about to give in until you hear Eddie’s voice behind the haze.

“Hold it,” he orders. “You said you would be good, so be a good little slut and hold it.”

Your head is already thrown back, and you squeeze your eyes shut in concentration. Every fiber of your being is focused on not cumming, wanting to do as Eddie wishes so you can please him. Noticing your efforts, he lifts the toy off of your aching clit and allows you to catch your breath. With your newfound relief from the strain of resisting climax, you notice that Eddie’s free hand has left your waist, and you look down to a glorious sight.

Eddie’s palming himself through his jeans. The image burns itself into your eyelids, so not even blinking becomes an escape from what you're witnessing your best friend do to himself (not that you’re complaining). You silently observe in awe as he attempts to shove his hand down his pants, and struggles on account of them being too tight. To remedy this, he unzips his jeans and slides them down just far enough for you to catch a glimpse of his hard cock straining against the fabric of his boxers. There’s a wet patch where his head was leaking precum, and a clear imprint of his impressively girthy shaft. Once the pants are out of his way you see his hand disappear inside of his underwear as he wraps it around his member and starts jerking harshly, not fully able to stroke up and down his length given the obstructive clothing.

The pure, unadulterated lust that’s consuming you is overpowering any shyness you previously felt. “Eddie,” you say his name, but he ignores you considering you’ve been a constant stream of “Eddie, Eddie, oh Eddie,” for the past ten minutes. “Eds,” you try again, “you can take it out.”

All movement inside his boxers halts. “Huh?” he exclaims with wide eyes, “A- are you sure? This was supposed to be about you.”

“I’m sure,” you confirm. And you lift up your t-shirt to reveal the white lacy bra underneath as you elaborate, “I want you to finish on me.”

His forehead wrinkles as his eyebrows shoot up in shock. With his wide eyed staring, it almost seems like he can’t believe what you’re saying. Drool pools in his open mouth before he composes himself with a head shake. Wordlessly, he sets the still vibrating toy down on the mattress and lifts your thighs off of him, before sitting up enough to pull down the sides of his boxers. His cock springs up the second his underwear is out of the way, and -without thinking about the consequences- you spit into your palm and reach out to tentatively wrap your fingers around him.

The strangled noise that leaves his mouth is the sweetest sound you’ve ever heard. He instinctively bucks his hips, but freezes, waiting for you to make the call. You start stroking him hard and fast, not bothering working up to a quicker speed when you were already so desperate for release and wanted him to cum with you. Eddie can apparently relate to said desperation, and hastily picks up the toy back up. Every muscle inside of you clenched as he started rubbing the tip against your clit in small circles. You strained to prolong this moment, knowing your eventual orgasm would be much more rewarding if you could see his face as he came all over your hand and stomach. 

“God, sweetheart,” he groans, “So fucking good. So much better than my hand.” 

The mental image of Eddie touching himself has you cursing out loud. “Really?” you ask, the pride getting to your head, making you feel light and floaty.

“You have no idea,” he responds. “Been fucking my fist nonstop since that movie night. Couldn’t help myself. All I could think about was you getting off, moaning my name.” You wonder if he knows just how real his fantasy was.

His free hand gently caresses the lacy undergarment covering your chest, his touch so light you barely register it. The uncertainty in his actions is clear, so in lieu of giving verbal consent you simply take his hand in your own and guide it to be fully on your breast.

“Can I pull this down, princess?” he practically begs, and you answer with a nod. He immediately tugs the breast cups downward, revealing your naked chest. Your soft, unmarked flesh is framed by the bunched up fabric of your shirt that’s been gathered at your clavicle, and the lacy material of your bra being held below by Eddie’s trembling hand. His hips are now moving in time with the rhythm of your strokes, and the rocking is causing your tits to bounce in a way that has his angry red tip spilling precum all over your hand as he attempts to hold off his release. The sight has you imagining what he would taste like, with you on your knees in the back of his van, and that thought has you hurtling toward the finish line at an embarrassing speed.

“Cum for me,” he orders. The second he gives you permission, you feel the damn break. As you're busy crying out in pleasure, you faintly hear Eddie in the background. “Good girl,” he grunts, “That’s it. That’s my girl.”

You cum with his name on your lips. The intensity of this orgasm is unfamiliar, and you realize with bitterness that the edging you were forced to endure was truly worth the end result. With your mind elsewhere, your stroking halts and you hear the creaking of your bed as Eddie starts to violently thrust into your fist until he meets you in orgasmic bliss. Warmth falls on your naked torso and you look down to see that he’s angled his cock to be aiming at your stomach, fulfilling your earlier wish of him finishing on you. The sight of him using your hand to milk himself dry combined with the buzzing still pressed hard against your clit has you cumming harder than you ever have before. Your hand falls from Eddie as his high comes to an end, but he does nothing to pull away the toy and offer relief to your achingly sensitive core. Any attempt to wiggle your hips free from his hold seems to go unnoticed by his strength, and you have no choice but to take the unrelenting vibrations. The overstimulation has tears falling down the side of your face as your shoulders raise from the bed, the top of your scalp pushing into the mattress as your head is thrown back. Eventually, you are able to move away, and Eddie turns off the toy and chucks it off the bed before climbing on top of you and finally kissing you on the lips.

With both of you breathing heavily into the other’s open mouth, the kiss isn’t exactly how you always imagined your first kiss with your best friend to go, but it’s perfect nonetheless. Your hands find their way into his wild hair, while his tighten their grip on your waist. His tongue in your mouth just barely has the taste of you on it from him licking your toy earlier, and as his thigh brushes your middle small aftershocks rush through your body. You stay like this for a while, lazily making out and feeling each other’s bodies, until he breaks off of your mouth to kiss down your jaw, to your neck, then back up to the side of your face.

When he reaches just under your ear, his lips part from your heated skin to whisper, “So we’re doing that again, right?”

Grabbing a tuft of his hair, you guide him back to your mouth, and with your lips moving against him you answer, “Definitely,” before deepening the kiss. You’re still unsure of what this exactly means for your friendship, but that can be talked about another time.

#eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson smut #stranger things x reader #stranger things x you #stranger things fanfic #stranger things smut

[zealousllamawolf]

Book Club (Alastor x Reader)

Parings- Alastor X Reader

!!Minors DNI with this post. R-18+!!

Summary- Reader unknowingly drugs tea for themselves leaving them vulnerable in the presence of Alastor

Word count- 5.5k words

Tags- bloodletting, p in v, rough sex, masturbation, crush against Alastor, drugged slightly. First time Reader, bondage, SMUT SMUT SMUT.

~~~

   It’s been ages since you could curl up somewhere quiet with a book. You struggle just to find time to be alone with the constant chaos of the other residents at the hotel. So, when Charlie announced at breakfast that everyone was welcome to come to dinner with her father, Lucifer, at his manor you were excited to decline. 

  You had just been given a new book by Angel that seemed interesting and romantic. Romance books held a special place in your heart even when you were still alive. You could see yourself as the main character being loved by someone to the fullest and that was all you needed for the most part. You never had a lot of romantic experiences on earth and surely not in hell. You did not trust anyone enough to be that vulnerable in front of them. 

  Well, that is not entirely true. There was Alastor, but it is not like you could trust him, you had the tiniest infatuation with him. He was always slithering out from the shadows invading your personal space. Even though you didn’t mind the close proximity whenever Alastor came up behind you to grab something that was in front of you, he would lean down close to your ear apologizing, “I am sorry for the intrusion, darling’’, only his voice was deeper than his usual charming range, while his tone scratched a deep itch inside your body. You can never help the heat building between your legs when you feel his breath on your neck as he slips away grinning triumphantly.

  Every time you felt his presence in the room you tried to keep yourself from trailing him with your eyes as he struts proudly with Charlie helping her with whatever she needs for the hotel but in most cases, you could not keep your eyes to yourself. Sometimes Alastor senses your heavy gaze so he turns and looks at you but instead of looking away he just stares at you his grin growing when warmth spreads to your cheeks leaving you hot and flustered forcing you to break from his stare. 

  None of this matters anyways it is not like he means anything by it. It is all just a part of the cruel game he plays to find enjoyment in the suffering of lowly demons. You sigh and shake your head, sitting up straighter. Looking around your plate is full while everyone else’s is almost finished.

  “Are you okay dear? Your plate seems… untouched” Alastor asks grinning, but his smile did not reach his eyes, seemingly concerned, his question forcing all eyes on you. “Wouldn’t want my little helper to starve now,” he said statically, preceding to stare you down.

  “I- um... I am not hungry this morning. I am fine, thank you,” forcing yourself to only look at Alastor for a moment before looking at Charlie. You squeeze your legs tight trying to refrain from thinking about Alastor ‘s back, flush with yours, cursing yourself for thinking about him in that way. “I was actually thinking about staying back while you guys go to dinner.” 

  Charlie frowns for a second before whipping up a reassuring smile “Oh, that’s okay! We will miss you but sometimes you just need a good RnR,” she smiles and finishes the last bite on her fork.

  “Yes, thank your princess,” looking at Angel, wiggling your eyebrows. “I am going to spend the night reading the book you gave me.” You playfully say with a smile barely able to contain your excitement bouncing up and down slightly. 

  Angel cocks an eyebrow at you. “Oh sugar, I am not sure that’s going to be very relaxing,” chuckling the spider demon smiles not willing to share his thoughts on the book further. 

  “Reading in general makes me relax I am sure I’ll be fine pretty boy,’ you giggle at the pet name and smile back at Angel who in return gave you a toothy grin. 

  “If you say so (y/n),” Angel says, picking up his plate and walking towards the kitchen. 

  Alastor grin softens as he sees how excited you were, hoping you would turn to look at him with the same sparkle your eyes gave Angel. Grin widening further he had an idea.

  “If you would not mind, dear, I would love to join you while you read. I have a couple radio show ideas that need to be put on paper,” he asks charmingly.

Just the thought of sitting next to Alastor made your cheeks flush and heartbeat rapidly. “Well, by all means come along, I-I wouldn’t mind the company,” you stutter slightly as the last part rushes out of your mouth, unable to control yourself.

  ‘How bold of you’, you thought to yourself, bringing your cold hands to your face trying to settle the burning heat you feel on your cheeks. ‘Why did I say that?’ You ask yourself, quickly coming undone when you think about being alone with Alastor. Temporarily unable to breathe you force yourself to cut up some of the cold food on your plate. A meaningless task you thought ‘Why did he even want your company?’

  “Very well, dear,” Alastor says as he gets up from his seat walking to your chair, only to stop a couple inches from where you sat, he leaned down and spoke softly in your ear. “Now, finish your breakfast darling.” You inwardly groan as his breath whisps past your neck. All you could do was sink slightly further into your chair and nod.

~~~

  You spend the rest of the day doing your laundry coming to and from your room on the second floor to the basement. Grateful for the mundane task you sigh contently thinking over your love life. Why hadn’t you branched out and at least experienced someone giving you pleasure? You always became hot and bothered from reading about love and sometimes lust, why could not you indulge with someone tangible. Your attraction towards these fiction man had overpowered any attraction for anyone in your real in your life. No one ever came close.

  Your mind drifted to Alastor, the sound of his voice or his closeness brought a flood between your legs and a small knot of tension in your stomach every time you saw him. It is not like you’ve never felt arousal before, buts it’s never been this strong for someone you could interact with. You shake your head and let out a frustrating sigh, trying to clear your thoughts as you gather up the rest of your last load, making your way back up to your room carrying your laundry basket.

  You decided once you reached your room to take a shower to try to clean off the dirtiness of your mind, swearing Alastor had a sixth sense for that, never failing you use it against you to make you flustered.

You take a short shower coming out of your bathroom wrapped in a towel as you make your way to your bed covered in folded clean clothes. Wrestling up some comfortable shorts and a large long sleave-shirt you get dressed without putting on a bra. Why would you? When you were alive that is how you dressed when you were lost in a book, why not be comfortable allowing yourself to let go today.

  Standing up off your bed you go to your bookshelf grabbing your Angels book and start to head downstairs to the kitchen to make tea and milk, your comfort drink for reading. When you make your way downstairs in the lobby, you are greeted by the crew getting ready to leave for Lucifer’s dinner.

  “Wow, you all look amazing.” Looking down at your lounge wear you suddenly felt embarrassed with how you were dressed.

   “Thank you (y/n), you look very comfy!” Charlie smiles as she bounces up and down while Vaggie tries to calm her, giggles some.

  You blush looking down to rub your feet together as Angel comes over grabbing your hand, raising your arm up and spinning you around with a twirl.

“Now, this is what I want to be wearing”, you giggle feeling the blush lift, Angel always making you feel instantly better. He reminded you a lot like a friend you had when you were alive, making you feel safe.

  “We should probably get going, don’t want to worry Dad.’’ Charlie chuckles as she practically out the door with Vaggie in tow, while everyone is waving and reciting their goodbyes the door finally closes behind them.

  Standing alone in the lobby you are left feeling empty, second guessing yourself on staying home. ‘Maybe you should have gone with them instead,’ you shook your head, chiding your own thoughts. ‘No’ you needed this; you have not had a real escape since showing up in hell.

  You skipped your way to the kitchen to prepare your tea. After successfully having the patience to wait for your tea bag to seep you poured what tastes and smells like milk into your tea, not noticing the label that fell to the floor reading ‘Property of Angel DO NOT touch’, gathering your book and mug you head to the bar.

  You grab a piece of paper and pen so you could write a note to Alastor letting him know where you were in case, he would hold to his word, which you were still unsure if he really meant it or if it was a part of his game.

I will be on the outside patio.

Waiting patiently

(y/n)

  Satisfied, you grab your things and make your way to the patio, a place you often came for some peace. You smile when you realize the fading light will be enough to read naturally for a little bit before the lights around the patio will turn on and the fireflies will be flicking just past the garden’s tree line. After a long gulp of your tea, you grimace at the overwhelming sweet taste, placing your mug down on a side table next to the comfortable outside couch. ‘Must have put too much sugar in.’ Shaking your head.

You settling down with your back leaning against the cushioned arm, you stretch your legs out before bringing your knees up close towards your chest allowing space for you to curl up with your book. Before you could start, you hear static in front of you and the air chilling around you slightly. You look up to see Alastor appearing with his shadows fading away around him as he sat with his legs crossed with a pen and pad laying on his lap.

  “Good evening, darling,’’ Alastor immediately noticed how your cheek grew into a deep crimson, but that is not all he noticed. Your feet were slightly apart and with the way your knees were placed you gave him quite the view. Your shorts had bunch up outlining your cunt perfectly, your puffy lips outrageously enhance by the middle seam of your shorts.

  “Hello Alastor,” looking down you flip your book opening it, holding in a moan since saying his name had influence on you making you clench your core suddenly heat spread between your legs.

  When Alastor saw your cunt clench, he almost let out a groan feeling rapid swelling against his pants. How did you have such a hold on him? He wanted to grab your ankles, pull you to him and rip off your shorts so he could finally taste your sweet-smelling core.Tearing his gaze away he sat there lost in his mind before you broke him of the spell you had on him.

  “If you’re okay with it I am going to start,’ you say as you flip to the first chapter, you look up and see Alastor’s smile stained. “Hey Al… you are doing, okay?” You ask though before you could start worrying, his smile changed softly.

“Go ahead darling, I am okay I am just thinking though some interesting ideas for my radio show.” You nod, returning your focus to your book.

  You and Alastor sat in silence for a while as you read long enough for the patio lights to have turned on. The tone of the book was unbelievably sexual from the first chapter. Graphic depictions of the two lovers sex life were… well it was making you more aroused. The male companion was exactly what you would want in the bedroom. Something you have fantasized repeatedly but you could not help picturing Alastor as the main male character. You being chained and dominated under him, wrists tied to a bed unable to do anything while you were being taken.

  Your core ached desperate for some attention, it had become overwhelming to say the least, your cunt clenched over nothing countless time. How could I get this horny after reading this book, it felt unreal, the aching increase and you almost let out a moan. ‘Oh my god what has gotten in you?’ you start to question reality now. Trying to clear your head you shifted slightly drawing Alastor’s attention back to you while your mind was captured with the scene being played out in your head unable to focus on your book.

  Alastor’s gaze shifted from your blushing, sweaty face to your cunt that was already beginning to leak with your arousal causing a wet spot on your shorts clearly, the fabric becoming slightly transparent forcing him to know the color of your panties. He felt his cock twitch aching for some friction. All he wanted to do was run a finger down your wet shorts, just to see what type of reaction you would make. Suddenly you throw your legs over the side of the couch, planting your feet on the ground unable to control your shaking legs. Alastor quickly looks down at his notepad afraid of getting caught looking at your cunt rubbing a hand across his face to try to mask his flustered face.

 Panting slightly, with your head hanging low you try to catch your breath as the aching became too much. Every part of your body felt sensitive like it was on fire and needed a release. You had to get away from Alastor and quickly, he could not see you like this. Lifting your head, you look in front of you noticing the fireflies pulsing in the distance. Perfect. Unable to think rationally you hop up on your feet and turn to Alastor.

  “I-I am going to go um… L-look at the… um fireflies! For a minute,’’ panting you try to regain your composure but Alastor sensed something was wrong, so he reaches out and grabs your hand sending electric shocks up your arm. You flinch and pull your hand back throwing it up to your mouth coving a small barely audible gasp.

  “Are you okay dear? You seem…wound up’’ his voice dropping an octave, your core throbbed at his voice wondering if that’s what he would sound like fucking you dumb.

“Y-yess, I am fine” sucking in a breath, you say, “I just need a minute to take a break.’’

  It takes everything in you to not run as fast as possible to find cover somewhere you could relieve the heat that was continually bubbling at your core. Finally making your way past the tree line and out of Alastor’s line of sight, crouching down on the fountain in the middle of the garden you collapse to the ground to your knees bracing yourself on the stone edge.

  Confused Alastor he picked up your book wondering if it was the cause of your sudden mood shift, peeking through a couple paragraphs only to find a complete description of a couple in an intimate moment. He looked up to where you had gone, a thought peeking is interest. He follows after you staying back some to see what you would do.

  Stuffing your hand under your panties, you instantly find your throbbing bundle of nerves and start to rub in circles causing you to moan loudly, confident you were out of ear shot from Alastor so you felt free to let go.

  You need more. Quickly you pull your shorts down a little with your spare hand, giving yourself a little more room to move further to your cunt entrance.You slide a finger down your slit and circle around your core getting your finger wet before entering yourself. “Oh… fuck,” you moan again.

  You have never felt anything like this before, everything feels more intense and sensitive. It would normally take minutes of fingering yourself to even reach this level of pleasure, but this was something different. Your walls clenched as you go deeper and found your sweet spot gently pressing back and forth, with this you are melting further down, unable to keep yourself up.

Alastor’s grinning face flashes against your tightly shut eyes like it has so many times before when you have touched yourself. You could not help but moan, “A-Alastor…” saying his name made your core tighten and started to spasming around your finger reaching your climax.

“Oh, you have been a naughty little girl’’, you gasp hearing Alastor’s voice behind you. Panting still coming down from your orgasm, you turn slowly facing him pulling your hand out of your shorts quickly.

“OH my, Alastor I-“

  “No need to explain dear’’ his smirk widening. “I did hear my name though. Were you touching yourself at the mere thought of me perhaps?”

  How did he hear that? Was he standing here the whole time?

  Bashfully you say in a quiet voice, “Y-yes’’ unable to hide your lust and desire throbbing from your inflamed cunt, you lower your head hoping he wouldn’t notice.

  Alastor’s in front of you in seconds using his staff to lift your chin forcing you to look at him. “It’s quite alright little doe” he leans down at the waist inches from your face making you squirm feeling his breath on your lips. “In fact, I have wanted to sample your taste for some time now,’’ with a strained smile, “All you have to say is one word, and I could help with your…” shifting his staff he trailed it down your stomach stopping right before he reached your cunt. “Problem.”

  Shamefully you could not say no so you whisper “Yes,’’ breathing out.

  Immediately after you respond he’s pressing his lips to yours, licking his tongue at your bottom lip you, asking for permission before proceeding. You moan against his lips finding yourself lost as he enters your mouth as his tongue searches yours, teeth lightly nipping at your bottle lip.

Your body lights up in that moment, you lean forward and wrap your hands around his neck pulling him closer as you rake your fingers though his hair. Stifling a moan, air whips around both of you, next thing you know, you find yourself on top of something soft. Your head starts to swarm, and your body starts to heat up just like before, telling you it needed to be touched.

  You break the kiss and lean your head back, breathing out as Alastor trails kisses down your jawline stopping before latching on to a sensitive spot. “Alastor… please I need…” You voice catching when he drags a claw down your side until he reaches the hem of your shirt. You shudder as his hand moves under slowly and slides up over your bare rib cage before stopping just under your breast.

  ‘’You need what, (y/n), be a good girl and use your words.” His hand moves up cupping your breast and runs a finger over your hard nipple making you moan and lean back forcing him to straddle one of your thighs with his knee pressed up against your cunt. You grind yourself against his leg, groaning as your eyes cloud with lust at the much-needed friction.

“T-touched. I need to be touched more.’’ It was all you could make out before Alastor rubs circles around your nipple making you shiver all over.

  “As you wish my sweet girl.” Alastor snaps and you are laying there completely bare in front of him. You let out a yelp and instinctively try to cover your mound with your hands before you could reach green chains appeared around your wrist pulling them over your head. You whine and try to close your legs even though it was helpless since his thigh was still pressed against you.

  “N-no one has ever seen…’’ you stop for a second so you would not sound dirty. ‘’Me before,” your face starts to burn in embarrassment. Alastor notices and trails his claws up your neck grasping your jaw to make you stare at him though half-lidded eyes.

 “Ill be gentle my sweet,’’ with that you nod allowing your legs to open wide letting Alastor have a full look at your glistening cunt. You hear his suck in a deep breath before lowly saying “You are perfect, and this is all mine to enjoy, no one else has even glimpsed at you.” He groans closing his eyes at the thought, using his spare hand and slides a finger though your slick folds, you hike your hips against his finger at the instant pleasure. “How far have gone before?” It takes you a second to respond, all you could focus was Alastor’s fingers gingerly touching your entrance. You glare at him for a second after registering what he said.

  “I’ve taken more than just my fingers Alastor,’’ you say faking anger. “Just not with anyone real.”

  In response to this Alastor’s thrusts his finger into you, curling up and presses down causing you to moan loudly at the sudden pressure on your sweet spot. His finger pumping faster as he adds another digit inflicting your walls to pulse over his fingers.

  His eyes shift to yours full of desire and command, “What have you used on yourself then?” Alastor’s eyes dart down to your cunt pressing his thumb against your clit, circling slowly.

  You jolt your waist up your whole body flares with heat. “A toy!” you practically yell in pleasure. Commanding your breath to return you say, “A six-inch p-plastic toy” tears forming in your eyes, choking more words out. “It was all I could manage.” You whisper, tears spilling over to the sides of your face, falling into your hairline.

  His grip gets tighter making his claws dig into your inner thigh, forcing small droplets of blood to rise to the surface. You wince at the pain, but surprisingly it increases your pleasure, making you rut your hips further on his fingers. Alastor moans while chuckling. “So, you do like pain too…” Gliding a third finger into your heat. “Oh, darling you are going to have to take more than six inches.”

  Your brain goes into over-drive as you start to feel pressure building in your lower stomach “Alastor please I need more” begging as more tears fall.

  ‘’Mmh, good girl. I want you to want me and me only, by the time we are done you are going to beg for me to stop.” He leans over your chest and takes a nipple in his warm mouth biting just enough to inflict pain, but he quickly runs his tongue in a circle causing you to moan his name. “Oh, you’re so reactive, every touch so far. I can’t wait to hear more of your precious sounds.”

  “T-that’s new…I’ve never felt like this before, the intense heat feels so.” You voice trailed off as Alastor leads kisses up your neck, he brings up his bloody claws up to his mouth, taking a taste. He groans loudly closing his eyes at the taste of your blood. You watch him open his eyes franticly looking at you with a need for more, your words fall out of your mouth. “Un-natural.”

  Alastor kisses your neck and nicks the soft skin, lapping up your blood feverishly. Your walls tighten around his fingers, feeling yourself close with an orgasm. Right before you get your release, he pulls his fingers out of your cunt, bringing them to his mouth he licks one digit clean before bringing them to your lips forcing them open. You lap up your own juices on his fingers making Alastor moan. Shutting your eyes as he sucks harder on your neck trying to draw out more blood. You hear his buckle coming undone as Alastor takes his fingers out of your mouth, in an instant he is fully undressed.

  You open your eyes at the touch of Alastor’s cock gently tapping your clit. You look him up and down, your eyes tracing his chest. Surprised to see a puffy patch of black and red hair, thinning out as it reaches his stomach leaving a happy trial of red leading down to his cock. You are left breathless as you gawk at the sheer size of him alone. Your eyes dart up and he's looking down at you with a mischievous grin as he slides the tip of his cock down your slit getting himself lubricated with your juices, stopping just before entering your heat.

  You fiddle with the chains restricting your movement and you whine, wiggling your hands. “Please Alastor, came I have my hands back, I want to touch you.” Moaning as he presses the tip of his cock into your cunt. You squeeze your eyes shut at the intrusion that came along with a burning sensation around your tight ring.

  “Oh, darling I think not. I happen to look though your book earlier, and it included bondage little doe.” His voice dropping the way you always fantasize over. Alastor gives you a moment to acclimate to his size before pressing further into you slowly, “and domination,’’ he says as he magically pulls the chains tighter. You gasp as he fills you more, filling you to the point you thought you were going to burst, you clench down hard around Alastor shaft resulting in his cock twitching inside you. Alastor moans and presses a hand on your lower stomach right over your uterus making you gasp not knowing that pressure would give you such an intense pleasure. “Just relax, you going to take all of me.” Alastor growls saying the last part as he reaches under one of your knees lifting it over his shoulder, pressing forward when he feels you ease up around his cock.

 You bite your lip hard trying to hold in a moan, enough to break the skin making your mouth fill up with the taste of iron. Some of the blood pooling around your mouth before falling slowly down your chin dripping on to your chest.

  Alastor looks down at you with lust filled eyes widening at the sight of your blood. You could see his composer failing, so you take your tongue and wipe it across your lip sucking in the blood you had on your lips. That sets something off in Alastor as he plunges the rest of his length flush with your hips. Surprised at the feeling of being completely filled and the force of the thrust you yelp in pleasure as his cock twitch against your cervix. Your cunt spasms around his perfectly snug cock making you shudder.

   Nothing has ever been inside you this deep before causing our cunt to burn as his cock stretches you beyond the breaking point, well past the three-inch girth of your previous toy.

  Straining against the chains you whisper breathlessly,” oh Alastor please move. I need more” you beg, grinding against his cock.

  “You are taking my cock like a good girl.” Alastor coos as he pulls back his hips pulling out enough to still have his tip buried inside you and thrust softly so you can get used to the movement. Moaning, you arch your back at the sensation of his cock pushing though your gummy walls.

  “Alastor,’ you growl pulling on the chains even though they dig into your skin leaving your wrists raw and red. “You don’t need to be gentle with me” sucking in your breath as he slides slowly into your cunt again. “I can take it.’

  “Don’t worry little doe you’ll get what you’re asking for,” thrusting into you with more force before he starts to take a brutal pace bruising your cervix each time, he pounds into you. Your vison starts to blacken around the edges as you are quickly approaching your release. Alastor grabs your other knee and forcing them to your chest gaining an angle that allows him to fuck you deeper. You could not hear yourself anymore for your mind was overloading with the pleasure he was encouraging and fucking into you.

  “Al-Alastor, Alastor… oh my s-stars. Alastor please.” You moan his name like a chant over again sometimes you could not make yourself speak but continued saying Alastor’s name in your head. Alastor lowers your legs and raises your hips higher making him hit your g-spot with each thrust. “Please d-don’t stop” you beg, rolling your hips trying to match Alastor’s speed feeling the coil at your core tighten further making your walls clench down in return Alastor moans at your sudden tightness.

  “Good girl, beg for my cock to make you cum” you shudder as he rapidly increases his pounding.

  “P-please Al-Alastor I n-need t-to cum’’ you sob stumbling though your words from the roughness and speed he was fucking you at.

 “Yes, doe, cum on my cock. Show me how much you want it.” Alastor leans down and kisses your collarbone and he bites hard leaving an outline of his teeth without breaking the skin.

The chains disappearing around your wrists, he slips his hands under your each of your arms pulling you up, wrapping his arms around your shoulders, latching on to your neck sucking so hard blood rises to the surface just under the skin.

‘’Bite me’’ you whine and slamming your hips against him, grinding on his cock. Wrapping your arms around his neck running your fingers through his hair before you reach his growing antlers, you grasp the for some support forcing Alastor’s thrust to sputter when your made contact with them.

Alastor bites down on to your shoulder, pain knocking the breath out of you as he breaks the skin but not enough to tear around his teeth. He pulls back for a moment to watch the dark red blood rise and bubble over before any bit had a chance to drip, his mouth cupped around the bite mark, the sweet liquid flooding into his mouth. Alastor’s body starts to react to the blood fucking you harder he starts to feel you tremble as your body tightens.

Your orgasm rakes though your body with such power you start to go limp, your walls pulsing around Alastor’s cock. He releases your shoulder with a pop and groans as you milk his cock making him reach his climax, sputtering thick chains of warm seed into your womb. You let out a whimper as he slows his thrusts before thrusting into one more time resting his already softening cock inside your heat not wanting to leave.

  Alastor lowers your upper half back onto the bed and stares at your weak twitching body. Adoring the way you looked, shoulder oozed slowly, lip ripped and completely fuck dumb. You sigh in contentment as you raise your hands and rub your face smiling, looking up at Alastor, his face reflecting the one you had.

  With one last thrust he pulls out of taking a moment to watch his seed leak out, groaning satisfied he conjures up a warm wet rag, cleaning you up as your eyes flutter shut still trying to catch your breath.

  Chuckling, Alastor tosses the rag near the end of the bed he leans over your bloody body and press a soft kiss on your lips feeling your smile grow against his.

  ‘’I am yours; I don’t want anyone else,” you whisper softly opening your eyes to gage how he would respond.

  With Alastor’s face so close to your he leans down planting another kiss on your lips and says, “So you will be, mine for the taking.” He settles down next to you and pulls you up to his chest resting your face against his chest. You sink your hands in the puff of fur and close your eyes drifting off to sleep as you listen to Alastor hum a song from his time.

~~~

Later that evening you go back down to the kitchen to rinse out your coffee mug and see a thin piece of paper on the ground near the fridge. Reading it you immediately you text Angel.

(y/n): Angel was this on a clear jug with milk in it.

Angel: Yes, it was can you tape it back to the jug, I don’t want someone to get drugged. <3

(y/n): Drugged with what?

Angel: A drug that makes sex feel more intense, Val gave it to me to use for the next shoot, something about having bigger, better reactions.

You quickly make your way to Alastor’s room not bothering to knock you barge in and announce, “I was DRUGGED, my tea was spiked.” You proceed to show your messages to Alastor and explained you had used the drugged milk in your tea.

Alastor looks at you with a mischievous smile and says, “Well I guess we have to do it again to be sure you know exactly what I gave you tonight.”

You couldn’t help the heat that burned your cunt at the thought of fucking Alastor again.

~~~

A/N- This is my first time writing a fanfic and having the courage to post it, I hope it’s okay!! Request are open I’ll be posting the parameters later but feel free to ask! Feel free to voice your opinion <3 Thank you for reading 

#alastor smut #alastor x reader #alastor #hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel fanart #hazbin hotel radio demon #hazbin hotel smut #alastor x y/n

[onlyhuis]

the king's gambit: en passant (teaser)

member | seungcheol x f reader teaser genre | angst (kinda), enemies to lovers series genre | smut, angst, fluff, happy ending; one-sided enemies to lovers, mafia boss!cheol, ceo!cheol, sugar daddy!cheol word count | this teaser - 0.7k; full fic - tbd (estimated 25k+) synopsis | Millionaire CEO Choi Seungcheol has never relied on anybody: not his parents, not his friends, no one. The only person that’s gotten him through life is himself and the power his name holds. But even now, with everything he could ever want at his fingertips, his life lacks purpose… until he meets you. teaser warnings | mention of alcohol series warnings | murder, gun violence; poisoning; kidnapping/hostages; mentions of blood; descriptions of sex workers/sexual acts for money; unprotected sex, BDSM elements; mentions of food and alcohol; warnings are subject to change as i continue writing! notes | this is a very short teaser for the 95z collab i'm doing called the king's gambit! there is no completion date for this yet as i'm still working on it (and struggling quite a bit— plot is not my usual thing lol). i've got a solid 13.1k down for now, which is by far the longest i've ever written, and there have been a lot of challenges getting to this point but i'm so excited to give you a little snippet of what's to come! once it's completed i will also be posting this fic on ao3 for readers who find that platform easier to use. i hope you enjoy, and if you do, don't forget to add yourself to the taglist for more updates!!

collab masterlist • taglist form • my ao3

it’s no surprise that seungcheol finds himself back at the casino, making his way over to the bar.

there’s not as many people in the casino at this hour of the morning as there were last night, but even still, most of the machines are full and a few of the blackjack tables are crowded with people eagerly awaiting their turn to waste away all their money.

you scoff when you see him sit down at your end of the bar. “damn, you look rough, mr. choi.” he hates the way his name sounds in your mouth, sarcastic and cruel. he hates that you don’t even know him, yet you already think you have him figured out. “did you have another long and tiring morning of partying?”

he growls under his breath but lets the comment slide, not wanting to do any more fighting today. he’s had enough of it as it is. “if you make me a bone dry martini i’ll give you a thousand dollars, right now.”

“of course, sir. anything for the vip paying customer.”

he sighs, pulling out his phone and setting it on the counter. “if you drop the snarky comments i’ll make it five thousand.”

you pause, the bottle of vodka in your hand. he sounds genuinely exhausted, and you almost feel a little bad for him. you don’t doubt that he has that much to spend, but that much money just for you to stop berating him seems a little extreme. “coming right up,” you say softly, grabbing a glass from the sparkling silver rack. “and you can keep the money.”

you finish pouring the drink and set it on the counter with a cocktail napkin, and he pulls out a thick stack of crisp hundred dollar bills from his wallet. you try to refuse him again, but he slaps the bills down, grabbing your hand and placing it on top of the money so you can’t pull away.

after a second he lets go of you, picking up his drink instead. “i’ll transfer the rest to your account today. go buy something useful.”

you look up at him with wide eyes. “mr. choi, that’s really very generous of you, but i don’t think—”

but cheol interrupts you, sighing again. “just keep it. don’t argue with me. please.”

you study him for a second, noticing for the first time the dark circles under his eyes and the way his hair is mussed like he keeps running his fingers through it. you nod silently, sliding the bills off the counter and pocketing them in your blouse pocket.

cheol’s eyes watch your movements closely, studying you in return. “don’t you have a safer place to hide that? casinos can be a dangerous place.”

you almost want to tell him, what on earth would he know about danger, but you bite your tongue and keep it to yourself. he’s had a long enough day on his own, it seems like; he doesn’t need to hear about all the times you’ve been catcalled and harassed, just inside his own casino. though, even if you did, he doesn’t seem like the type to care.

you shove the cash in your drawer beneath the bar and cheol nods, downing the rest of his drink with surprising ease, considering how strong it is. he sets the now empty cocktail glass down, wincing a little before he slides off of his stool and starts to walk away, leaving without another word.

“wait!”

he stops and turns around, waiting. 

you freeze, standing there in silence. you hadn’t expected him to stop. you don’t even know why you’ve stopped him. to ask him if he’s okay? clearly he’s not. to tell him to be… happier? to cheer up? you sigh. this was stupid. “nevermind, i’m sorry. have a nice day, mr. choi.”

he gives you a halfhearted smile and a wave. “yeah. you too.”

you watch him walk away, shoulders hunched and suit wrinkled. you can’t help but be curious about what he’s been up to that’s made him so exhausted, and you begin to wonder if maybe there might be more to this millionaire ceo than you first thought.

> no taglist since this is just a teaser; but, you can join the main taglist here!

> please consider reblogging + leaving feedback! this is the first time i've attempted a longer story like this and it has proven incredibly difficult for me, but knowing you guys are equally as excited for it as i am helps me stay motivated to keep going :)

#[📌] — june.writes #[✏️] — the king's gambit #scoups smut #seungcheol smut #scoups scenarios #scoups imagines #scoups x reader #scoups angst #scoups fluff #scoups fanfic #seungcheol imagines #seungcheol fanfic

[imnotselfryed]

Another child? [d. djarin]

word count: 1.1k (is this even a drabble??)

content/warnings: daughter & father relationship after a bit, mini Ahsoka mention (i had to), din being softer than usual bc grogu softened him up 😭, a sprinkle of angst. Italics means flashback, gif not mines, not proofread :)

☆♫☆♫

“I can bring you in warm, or I can bring you in cold.” The Mandalorian said to his daily bounty. He’s a busy man and he needed those credits now that he has a small someone to take care of. This bounty though seemed…a bit younger than usual. “Seems fun” You said with all the calm in the world.

“You’ve got 10 seconds before I end this conversation.”

“You could try but I want to get this over with.”

Mando sighed as he gripped your arm harshly. “Let’s go kid. I’m not here to play games.” “Kid? I’ll have you know I’m a grown adult thank you very much,” You said with the best “adult” voice you’ve had. You’ve been on the run after your entire world fell apart. You learned to adapt to your surroundings and environment. It’s a cruel world, galaxy even, so you’ve learned to not be the child you actually are. Mando sighed again as he threw her in the ship. “Well, wow. This is a humble abode.” 

“It’s not that impressive. It still works perfectly even though it's probably thousands of years old. Just sit down and be quiet, kid. I’m actually being generous.”

“That's probably the coolest thing you’ve said this entire time.”

Mando stayed silent as he punched in the locations. He had a sad and weird feeling that you were not the adult you say you are. He didn’t exactly want to bring you in, for someone else to potentially hurt you. The mandalorian spoke up, “Well, you don’t see many..smart..bounties, like you, kid. Most end up dying from stress.”

“D’aww you called me smart! I’m so honored” You said sarcastically. It's one of the only ways you have survived all these years, or at least how you survived for the little years you lived. “You must really like sarcasm huh?” “Oh I love sarcasm.” 

The Mandalorian continued, “Now tell me…why were you taken in as a bounty? You don’t seem too much of a criminal.”

“Well….Since I was so depressed about…something personal that happened when I was younger, I kind of had a “villain arc” you could say but..I’ve changed. Still sad about it though.” You answered sadly while reminiscing about your past. It all felt like yesterday. “Someone..killed my mother. The only piece of family I’ve had.”

It was a normal day, you were around 8 when it happened. You and your mother were collecting your daily food at the market because everyone was fleeing for their lives. The empire was about to harm everyone and everything that comes in their way, and your planet blocked their view. Your mother on the other hand though, was as calm as you grew up to be. After that, both of you rush outside to see the sky reddened. Your mother crouched down to match the height of you.

 “Dear, I love you. You know that right?” She smiled sadly. “I know, Mama.” You say somber, knowing what was about to come next. A bomb, not too far from you and your mother blew up on the ground. Everyone was panicking, trying to evacuate but you really didn’t care. All you cared about was your mother. “Baby, please. Promise me you’ll take care of yourself, find someone that’ll protect you, please be safe,” she said, tears glistening in her eyes. “I will, Mama, don’t worry. Maybe we can find eachother again!” A tear ran down your small cheek as your mother wiped it away. “I hope so.”

A sympathetic look crossed the Mandalorian’s face. Out of all people he definitely knew what it was like to lose a loved one. “I know how difficult that is. I lost mine when I was just a boy. Are you still struggling with your loss though?” Mando sounded softer than usual, he wasn’t as big and bad as he was when he first met her.

“I am…and I’m still so young. Everything happened so fast. I like to act older than I am because It makes me forget about the past. I am actually just a kid.” “I understand. Life can change on the whim of a moment. But, kid, don’t hide your inner child. The galaxy needs some more happiness in it.”

You nod as you stare at your hands, wishing you were stronger and that you were actually able to save your mother. You clench your hands in worry, and in anger. Mando notices this and felt bad for you. “Is..everything okay? Is there something you want to share with me?”  “No….it’s alright. I’m alright,” you say sadly while playing with the small ring on your finger, the one your mother gave you. “Look, I’m sorry for your loss, kid. I know you’re trying to stay safe for your sake but holding in that pain isn’t the right answer.”

“I know it’s just…I’m not sure how to talk about my feelings really. I’ve been keeping it all in my entire life.” Mando had a small idea, (eureka /j), something that would protect this young one, and control her stress. “I know just the person to help you with that. A Jedi who guided me through struggles of my own loss. You should find her someday. She can help you kid, I know it.” “Yea…but I’m not Jedi material..plus I don’t want to be one. I think it’d just give me even more stress. They probably wouldn’t be able to handle my sarcasm either” You chuckled. “You’re stuck with me now anyway, Metal man.”

Mando sighed, “So be it.” You smiled a small grin. “So what can I call you anyway?” 

“People call me Mando. It’s something I was sworn to be. I have dedicated my life to serve the clan of Mandalore.” “Woah! So your a Mandalorian? That’s so cool!” You said fairly quickly. “I’m just..alive, I guess. Sometimes I wish I was cool,” you sighed as you stared at your ring. “You are pretty cool, kid. Don’t let your past define who you are, you define that, and what future you will have. What will it be,” Mando said, actually curious.

You stayed silent as you thought to yourself. “Find someone who will protect you,” your mother had once told you. You are only 13 now, and have nowhere else to go anymore. You couldn’t survive on your own. The Mandalorian is the only one who could protect you now. “Could I maybe…stay here?”

Mando looked back at her in shock, why would she want to stay here? He thought but she was only a child, he couldn’t just abandon her. He had the same choice with Grogu and he’s like a son to him now. He patted her head, unsure of what to do. “Sure, kid. I promise I'll protect you. We’ll have other adventures also. How does that sound?”

☆♫☆♫

#mandalorian #din djarin #starwars #star wars drabble #din djarin drabble #child!reader #fluff #angst #fanfiction #star wars fanfiction #din djarin fluff #mandalorian fluff #mandalorian x child!reader #mandalorian imagines #star wars imagines #imagines #blurbs

[kaliii-is]

The stars above us

Pairing: Regulus Arcturus Black x reader

Summary: After all sneaking out isn’t that bad.

A/n: First fic that i ever post!!! Tell me what you think, i did my best writing this. If there’s any mistakes pls lmk💕

The corridors always tend to get silent at night, especially on a school night, reason is the students get scared of getting caught. But there always will be some little rebels who think of themselves above the rules, and you definitely weren’t one of them, well that’s what you tried to convince yourself as you were currently drawing in the astronomy tower.

The previous day had been a particularly, let’s say stressful one,as your O.W.Ls were approaching, everyday seemed to get busier, and of course shittier, every week was getting more tiring, more exhausting, you practically reached your limit. And deep down you knew that if you continued at that rate, you would surely be the death of yourself.

So after such a day, you found it only fair if you dedicated some time to yourself without having to worry about what you would do next. After what you thought was 30 minutes, you finally checked your watch, realizing that it has been 2 hours, and even though you would’ve loved to continue the drawing that you started, you followed your better judgement and decided that it was finally time to go back to your dorm.

You packed your stuff and went down the endless stairs that led to the tower, you then were silently walking through the corridors, doing your very best to not draw any attention to yourself, and you succeeded, you were finally able to perceive the door of your house’s common room, and just as you were about to open the door, you felt a harsh tug on your wrist, making you turn around. You searched for the person’s eyes, and when you did find them, you were met with grey eyes. Very uncommon right? Well that definitely wasn’t your first thought, the first thing that you noticed was their undeniable beauty. No living creature could resist those gorgeous eyes, it’s like they were the perfect mix -

- What are you doing here at such an hour?

- I’m sorry?

- What are you doing here? It’s practically one in the morning, you should be in your dorms. Is there a party somewhere or something?

- A party some-? No no, i am alone, look i’m so sorry is there any possible way that i could get my way out of this?

- Really? That’s the best you can do?

- Look i’m not one to usually sneak out-

- But you did it this time, which gives me full power to either take out house points or give you detention.

- How about none?

- This really is your first time huh?

- I told you!

- Look, i’m feeling quite generous right now,so just tell me why you snuck out, and if the reason is good enough, i might let you go with no consequences.

- Really?

- Hurry up i might change my mind.

- Fine, okay , i had a very shitty week, and i didn’t have much time for myself or for anything other than studying actually, so i finally had some time to draw, and i used it. But i can only draw when i’m in the astronomy tower for some reason.

He seemed to consider wether or not he should let you go, but after what felt like forever he finally said.

- Okay, fine , but -

- Oh come on!

- Let me finish or i’ll send you in detention; he stopped waiting for an answer, you obviously gave him none; like i was saying, i’ll let you go if you give me your name.

- Really? That’s it ? Perfect! My name is Y/n L/n. What about you?

- Regulus, Regulus black.

I do not see Timothee Chalamet as Regulus in this fic, first because i want to give total freedom to the reader, and second due to his latest announcement about the ongoing war in Gaza ( he made a joke about the war). It may seem futile to some people, but when you know that no one dared to make a joke about the war in Ukraine, and that 10 578 people have died during the last month. It’s not funny, it’s cruel.

#regulus black x reader #regulus black #harry potter #hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry #hogwarts legacy #harry potter x reader #golden trio era #fanfic #romance

[breakonthroough]

Parallels in Trigun and One Piece.

Today I would like to share my thoughts about the parallels and references in One Piece, which I noticed for myself when watched the anime Trigun — both versions old and new (and yes, I came to them after I caught up with OP ongoing). I may have imagined something, but some parallels suggest themselves. I think Oda-san, like many other mangakas, took a lot of inspiration from Yasuhiro Naitou's classic work.

Analysis may and does content ! spoilers !

1. First of all, from the direct references and easter eggs of Oda-sensei, I would note the similarity of Sanji holding a wounded Zoro on his shoulders, bandajed like a cross, in the Wano arc with Nicholas D. (!) Wolfwood, with his big weapon-cross at the ready. It was a funny gag from Odacchi :)

2. Then, the "Sandsteamer" in Trigun reminded me very much of the "Sea Train" in OP. I don’t know if this is a reference or not, but they definitely have something in common. The principle of movement of steam vehicles in an atypical environment.

3. Another point - the antagonist character of one of the episodes (just about the Sandsteamer), Brilliant Dynamites Neon, very much reminded me of Arlong, both with his toothy design and his charisma.

4. Well, the gang of the Donquixote family reminded me in many ways in its diversity of Knives’ organization “The Gung-Ho-Guns”. (And also it reminded me the BB crew too).

5. Well, the most important parallel for me is the clear and definite similarity of the story and the contrast between the main characters of Trigun - Knives Millions and Vash the Stampede with the Donquixote brothers. I’ll go into more detail here, because there are plenty of references, besides the fact that each of them is a handsome blond.

💙💙💙

▪️If Vash, in fact, bears little resemblance to Rocinante, except for his wounded and scarred body and the fact that, unlike his brother, he is also kind and soft-hearted. Both of them often play the fool, posing as awkward, stupid simpletons (with different goals, of course), and at the same time almost never show outsiders their deeply sad soul, traumatized by losses and experiences.

▪️Doflamingo personality as character imo was largely inspired as personality of Knives, as it seemed to me. The parallel is that he and his brother are similarly representatives of a superior (in their opinion) race, but they only treat ordinary people differently.

▪️Knives and Doflamingo, unlike their kind brothers, are evil incarnate. Proud, arrogant and cruel. Intolerant and merciless towards human weaknesses and any manifestations of kindness and gentleness. Both have a justified and (from their pov) very logical reason to hate people as a race and the whole world order.

And both also have a plan to destroy the world that does not suit them and build their own, ideal one. Both of them are involved in the murder of people dear to their brothers (father for Roci, Rem for Vash). Well, in both cases, the good brothers are trying with all their might to prevent the implementation of the grandiose plans of the evil brothers.

▪️Well, I must say that the showdown between Vash and Knives ends in the anime much less disastrously than that of Doffy and Roci. But even in the general plans of these scenes, analogies and parallels are visible, as it seemed to me. 😢

Well, as you know, the brilliant refers to the great. I'm glad that for all their similarities, these stories and characters turned out to be different. Oda may have been inspired by the work of his predecessor, but he created his own epoch-making story with a great plot and beloved, touching characters.

Russian translation below 👇

Параллели и отсылки к Тригану в One piece.

Сегодня я хотела бы поделиться своими мыслями насчёт параллелей и отсылок в One piece, которые отметила для себя, когда посмотрела аниме Триган — обе версии (да, я дошла до них уже после того, как нагнала онгоинг Куска). Что-то, возможно, мне померещилось, но кое-какие параллели напрашиваются сами собой. Думаю, Ода-сан, как и многие другие мангаки, немало почерпнул для вдохновения из ставшей классикой работы Ясухиро Найто.

1. Прежде всего, из прямых отсылок и пасхалок Оды-сенсея я бы отметила сходство Санджи, держащего на плечах раненого Зоро, перемотанного как крест, в арке Вано с Николасом Д. (!) Вулфвудом, с его оружием-крестом наперевес. Это был смешной гэг от Одаччи:)

2. Затем, Песчаный Пароход мне очень сильно напомнил Морепоезд. Не знаю, отсылка это или нет, но что-то общее в них точно есть. Принцип движения парового транспорта в нетипичной для него среде.

3. Ещё один момент — персонаж одного из эпизодов (как раз про Песчаный пароход), Brilliant Dynamites Neon, очень сильно напомнил мне Арлонга, как зубастым дизайном, так и своей харизмой.

4. Ну и банда семьи Донкихот мне во многом напомнила своим разнообразием организацию Найвса "The Gung-Ho-Guns".

5. Ну, и самая главная для меня параллель — явная и определенная схожесть истории и противопоставления главных персонажей Тригана — Найвса Миллионса и Вэша Урагана с братьями Донкихот. Тут остановлюсь подробнее, ведь отсылок, помимо того, что каждый из них прекрасный блондин, предостаточно.

💙💙💙

Если Вэш, по сути, мало чем напоминает Росинанта, кроме израненного и покрытого шрамами тела �� того, что он, в отличие от брата, также добрый и мягкосердечный. Оба они часто придуриваются, изображая из себя неловких глуповатых простаков (с разными целями, разумеется), и при этом почти никогда не показывают посторонним свою глубоко печальную и травмированную потерями и переживаниями душу.

Дофламинго же, как мне показалось, во многом списан с Найвса. Параллель в том, что они с братом аналогично являются представителями высшей (по их мнению) расы, только относятся к обычным людям по-разному.

Найвс и Дофламинго, в отличие от своих добрых братьев — воплощённое зло. Гордые, высокомерные и жестокие. Нетерпимые и беспощадные к человеческим слабостям и любым проявлениям доброты и мягкости. У обоих есть обоснованная и очень логичная с их точки зрения причина ненавидеть людей и существующее мироустройство. А также есть план по разрушению не устраивающего их мира и построения своего собственного, идеального. И тот, и другой причастны к убийству дорогих для их братьев людей (отец для Росинанта, Рем для Вэша). Ну и, в обоих случаях, реализации грандиозных планов злых братьев всеми силами пытаются помешать добрые.

Ну и, должна сказать, разборки между Вэшем и Найвзом заканчиваются в аниме куда менее плачевно, чем у Доффи и Роси. Но даже на общих планах этих сцен видны аналогии и параллели, как мне показалось. 😢💔

Что ж, как известно, гениальное отсылает к великому. Я рада, что при всей своей схожести, эти истории и персонажи получились все же разными. Ода, возможно и вдохновлялся работой предшественника, но создал свою собственную эпохальную историю с великолепным сюжетом и любимыми, трогающими за душу персонажами.

#analysis one piece #character analysis #analysys trigun #comparison #one piece #one piece and trigun parallels #donquixote family #doflamingo donquixote #doffy #donquixote rosinante #donquixote rocinante #donquixote corazon #donquixote doflamingo #knives millions #vash the stampede #trigun vash #vash and knives #analysis #my thoughts #trigun stampede #trigun and one piece #meta breakonthroough #meta op #one piece meta #trigun

[not-available-for-comment]

I’m always a little amused when people assume that something very commonly enjoyed by a lot of people is actually a government/corporate plant because they don’t personally enjoy it.

“Gift wrap is a big business conspiracy” Actually people have been wrapping gifts or putting them in fancy boxes or bags for millennia before capitalism existed but now I know not to gift wrap your presents so at least there’s that I guess.

Not quite the same thing, but I had a conversation at a bus stop a few months ago where a man told me that the rich people in my town hated homeless people so much that they’d intentionally blind them with bright headlights at bus stops.

Me: Or… they don’t want to run anyone over?

Him: Well that’s just what I’ve been told

Me: It just seems like a lot of work…

Like, I actually get how this happens. You experience enough adversity in life, due to being neurodiverse or homeless or part of a generational cycle of poverty or subject to systemic racism, and it gets hard to believe that things can be this consistently fucked for you without it being personal. People don’t like gift wrap, or small talk, or other small social gestures, it’s actually Big Business manipulating the people who expect them of you, or a cruel joke they’re playing on you, specifically, because they hate neurodiverse people. Ultrabright headlights aren’t a known problem on roadways due to various social and economic pressures, people are just blinding you, specifically, because they hate you.

And there’s often a kernel of truth in these things! Some people do use details of social interactions to make autistic people miserable, intentionally or not, because their own inflexibility refuses to meet people halfway. Like, if you don’t like gift wrap then I’m going to start just handing you shit, rather than insisting you like my wrapping job. And I’ll work with you to find super easy and non-stressful wrapping solutions for when you do need to give wrapped gifts. But there are people who would insist that you continue giving and receiving gifts Properly, because you Need To Learn, and that’s still not big business manipulation but it *is* shitty.

Rich people in my town *do* kinda hate homeless people actually. They’re just probably not intentionally blinding people who wait for the bus in the dark. Because rich people hatred is usually disinterest and carelessness, not intentional malice.

I could go on with more examples, but my point is that whenever I encounter these messages from bizarro world where everyone has conspired to convince you that [gift wrap][saying hello][driving with headlights on] is a good thing when they all secretly hate it and/or you, I always have two reactions. One is to laugh a little, because dear god no one has that kind of time, buddy. Most of us are just living our lives in the best way we can. Vast and deeply pointless conspiracies aren’t fun and are a waste of time. Why would we live like that?

But the other reaction is always to be a little sad. Because life has to have hurt you for you to start believing this stuff. Has no one ever explained social interactions to you, to the point you’re assuming gift wrap is a practical joke? Have you received so much heartless cruelty in life that the idea of being intentionally tortured at a bus stop is more likely than “people trying to see in the dark”? How do I show you the world is kinder than that, when you have so much evidence to the contrary?

#rocky rambles

[thewritetofreespeech]

Hello! Can you please write angst with Mammon who was a giant asshole towards MC in the beginning but soon became infatuated with her. But when he finally asks her out, MC rejects him saying that she hates him for being a cruel asshole and calls him a monster. After that he goes right back to being a self centred scumbag but never gets over her.

This is my first time asking for a request so I hope I didn't mess this up. But I really am a sucker for Mammon angst 😩. Please ignore this request if you don't want to do it. 😇😇

Mammon + Reader rejection

Mammon took a deep breath through his nose. Wiped his hands on his slacks. Then straightened his back.

Ok, he was ready.

He had been planning to tell [Y/N] how he felt about them and ask them out on a date. He figured it was time. Trying to ignore them or brush them off didn’t seem to quell his feelings, and every day they seemed to be getting stronger and strong. Which led him to being more and more irritated with them that he couldn’t make it go away. So, he figured that he needed to confront his feelings and [Y/N].

Walking into an open classroom where [Y/N] was getting ready to leave for their next lesson, the demon puffed up his chest and came over to them, “hey [Y/N]!”

“What do you want Mammon?” They asked in a surly sort of tone, but with a brow furrow that just made his heart race.

“What? Is that anyway to speak to the Great Mammon?!”

“I have to get to class.”

“Wait don’t go!” Mammon urged. Reaching out to stop them, but not actually touching them. “I mean…I’m willing to let it slide, since I’m such a generous demon. In fact, I’m even willing to take you out next Friday to this show I got tickets for.”

“No thanks.”

The demon balked at their refusal, but quickly regrouped. “I don’t think you understand. This is a VIP experience. The club owner gave them to me because I’m so awesome.” He wanted to let them know that he was admired by others. “So, what do ya say? I can pick you up at your room at 9.”

“I said no thanks.” [Y/N] repeated.

Mammon clicked his teeth and growled. “Why not?!” He was really trying here. He was being nice and generous and they still didn’t want to go out with him.

“Are you serious? You mean besides the fact that you’ve been treating me like I’m some house pet since I got here, or some dumb human despite getting better grades on the tests than you?” He flinched at that. That was…harsh. “You’ve never treated me with an ounce of kindness since I got here. If you acknowledge me at all. Now I’m supposed to be grateful your inviting me out for a night? No. Besides the fact that I don’t trust you, I’m not going to spend my night with someone like you. So can you please just let me go to class?”

The demon felt like his heart was breaking. A new sensation, since he wasn’t aware he had a heart to break. It really hurt.

“F-F-Fine!” He shouted back. Because when he was hurt, he got angry. “See if I care! I tried to do something nice for you, but this is how you’re going to act then I don’t need ya! I’ll find someone else, someone better, to go out with and they’ll appreciate what I’m trying to do for them!” He stormed out of the classroom and down the hall towards the exit.

It hurt. It hurt so much. He’d been rejected before, by nearly everyone, but being rejected by [Y/N] hurt like never before. He needed to get out of here. He needed to get away.

Out of the school and into the courtyard Mammon shifted into his demon form and literally flew away from the school. He didn’t come back home for a few days. And when he did, he was his usual scummy-older brother self to everyone. Especially [Y/N]

#obey me #obey me scenarios #obey me imagines #obey me mammon #mammon x mc #mammon x reader #mammon #obey me mammon x reader #obey me mammon x mc #scenarios #imagine

[rphelperblog]

Brigid Kemmer Quote RP Meme

NYC best selling author who is most famous for her fantasy series-inspired by @multistoty​ and @for-the-king-x​

“Not all scars can be seen, my lady.” 

“I will not take from those who have nothing.” 

“I can appreciate that he wants to do it himself, but I'm kind of done with prideful men” 

“Because despite all outward appearances, I’m not cruel. I don’t delight in pain. I don’t delight in any of this.” 

“When there are calls for revolution, we should be riding at the front, not hiding in the shadows.” 

“Scars mean you survived something terrible.” 

“Unfortunately, the desires of rulers are not always the desires of the people.” 

“She's not the type to swoon for pretty lies.” 

“Never offer blindly, my lady. Not for your family. Not even for yourself.” 

“Do not fault yourself for choices you believed were right in the moment. It is not princely.” 

“I often find comfort in the thought that fate has already drawn a path beyond what seems impossible.” 

“I’m not sure precisely what has changed between us, whether it’s trust or respect or simply the ability to see each other in a different light.” 

“One poor choice shouldn't undo a thousand good ones.” 

“You have an unusual definition of luck."

"Spoken like someone who lives in a castle with an endless supply of food and wine, but calls himself cursed.” 

“True strength is not determined by how brutal you can be,”

“True leadership is not determined by killing those who oppose you.” 

“I could have chosen no one better, my lady. Truly.” 

“He looks like revolution. He looks like compassion. Blue eyes and gentle hands and quick feet and a core of strength and steel.” 

“Fear makes people act in ways we'd never expect.” 

“I'll take anything over days of silence.” 

“Kindness leaves you vulnerable. I learned that lesson years ago.”

“I’m not a killer. I heal people; I don’t harm them.” 

“Our relationship seems to tick forward like the hands of a clock, always changing in relation to each other.” 

“I’ll never be free of this. Of who I am. This will be my life as King’s Justice: the most feared man in the kingdom, and somehow also the most alone.” 

“Have we spent so long seeing each others vulnerabilities that we forgot each others strenghts?” 

“Knowledge should not be greeted with scorn.” 

“There are too many layers here. I thought it was as simple as right or wrong . . . ​but it’s not.” 

“ It is meant as a mark of respect. When you travel with me people will assume you are a lady, a servant, or a whore. would you prefer one of the latter?”

“If I put a crystal goblet in this one's hand, she'd likely smash it and use the shards to cut me.” 

“Reading is not unproductive.” 

“I have heard every manner of scream without flinching. I have listened to promises and threats and curses and lies—and occasionally, the truth. I have never hesitated in doing what needs to be done.” 

“I´d like to kiss you,"

You are not a weapon,”

“She trusts me. I trust her. This feels more monumental than love. More precious. More earned. I keep my hands to myself.” 

And acting like a prince generally means acting like an arrogant know-it-all, so you shouldn’t have any trouble at all.”

“He has this uncanny ability to make his words a veiled threat and a whispered promise at the same time.” 

“Whoa. I have no idea what I expected him to do, but that's even better.”

"Choices are never easy. There are good and bad options, but the most dangerous is to not make any choice at all.”

“Today, guilt is a thorn I cannot remove.” 

“Right now, in this moment, I would grant her my kingdom if she asked.” 

“When I was young and I’d wake with nightmares, my mother always used to say, All you have to do is think of me, and I’ll appear in your dreams. I’ll help you chase the nightmares away.” 

“They're being such idiots. They should have just talked to each other.” 

“Have you not figured it out yet? The curse torments us all.” 

“A spark of rebellion is all it takes to defy the night.” 

"That monster killed them all.” 

“You are merciful and kind. But kindness and mercy always find their limit, beyond which they turn to weakness and fear.” 

“You said that not every problem can be solved by the end of a sword. I have carried those words with me for days... Since you made me realize that I am no longer a weapon to be wielded by another.” 

“I’m not going to fall in love with you,” 

“I know trust is not something you win once, but is instead something you must earn over and over again.” 

“The enemy of my enemy is my friend.” 

“I keep hoping for peace. I keep longing for empathy. I keep expecting people to act as I would.” 

"Have mercy, my lady. I know your soldiers are said to enjoy tearing men limb from limb, but----"

“There was something about knowing how long you have to suffer that was better than just waiting.” 

“I think that very few people truly deserve what they get.”

“I’m confident in my strengths, but that doesn’t mean I don’t think about my weaknesses.” 

“I was born this way and I'm going to die this way, so teach me to work around it.” 

“While your weakness may be a disadvantage in some ways, it is an advantage in others. One I think you could use to your benefit.” 

“Mind your mettle”

“To whom it may concern: I’m not involved.”

“Ah yes, the most dangerous person at the party is always the girl sitting alone with a book.” 

“It is not weakness to wish for peace.” 

“When a man no longer deserves your loyalty, it is not a failing of yours” 

“It [is] possible to be strong and yielding at the same time.” 

“I haven't gotten in a fight yet this year!

It is not the moment of passing that is most important. It is all the moments that come before.” 

“Failure isn’t absolute.” 

“If you can't fix what went wrong, then fix what you can make right.” 

“One day isn't your whole life. A day is just a day.” 

“The choices we face may not be the choices we want, but they are choices nonetheless.” 

“You make your own path.”

"Yield to yourself. Yield to forgiveness. Yield to happiness. Yield to this moment. It's not hers. It's yours. It's mine. It's ours.” 

"Because that is all that exists at the end of this path. I am sure of it. This was never a curse to be broken. This is a death sentence. The true curse has been the thought that we might find escape.” 

“Fury and fascination wage war in my thoughts.” 

I want so desperately to turn it into more, to see where this blossoming attraction will lead.” 

“I didn’t realize it was possible to be strong and yielding at the same time.” 

“I hope she does come here. I hope she comes to this room. Because I don’t care what I have to do. I’m going to end her.” 

“I am crying because you are a prince,'and I..'I am not a princess.” 

“This early in the season, the other girls would sit by the hearth and gaze at me over crystal goblets, while I’d pour wine and tell stories with just enough devilishness to make them blush. If I put a crystal goblet in this one’s hand, she’d likely smash it and use the shards to cut me.” 

“Girls are more likely to stay if you don’t fight with them.” 

“Failure isn't absolute, just because you couldn't save everyone doesn't mean you didn't save anyone.”

“Words spoken in the dark in the middle of the night always feel so much heavier than they would at any other time.” 

“I think I’m going to need you to run that by me again.”

“I am always surprised to discover that when the world seems darkest, there exists the greatest opportunity for light.”

“Choices are never easy. There are good and bad options, but the most dangerous is to not make any choice at all.” 

“...while ruthlessness may have its place, I believe your brand of strength would garner greater loyalty. That is what makes you dangerous. Not because you would ride in with a blade and take control, but because you could quietly sit in this chair, in the dark, with your book...and you could determine the best way to achieve what needs to be done.” 

Do you want to hit me back? You can."

“He stalked across the room like he wanted to wage war, but he kisses me like I'm the most delicate thing in the castle.” 

“My left leg is clumsy and about to give way, but I mentally threaten to cut it off if it doesn't get me out of here. It listens.” 

#open to all #open to anyone #open rp #ask meme #rp meme #open meme #open to anybody #roleplay meme #ask prompt #memes #open starter #fantasy starter #fantasy rp #open fantasy roleplay #open fantasy starter #historical rp #open historical roleplay #open historical starter #book quote meme #booktube #ya books #book rp meme #brigid kemmerer #a curse so dark and lonely #a vow so bold and deadly #defy the night #defend the night

[davidjrpalos]

♡

If it wasn’t obvious I’ve been feeling very reflective lately and I kinda just wanna talk about the changes I’ve gone through in the past year. Almost a year ago, after doing odd jobs inconsistently since I was a teenager and relying on what I made off just my artwork, I took a stab in the dark for some financial stability with the intention of eventually leaving town and going back to the city. I took a normal job working nights about five minutes away from my house. At that point I was very guarded, distrusting of others, had zero intentions of putting any emotional investment in the enviornment around me. I’d been isolating myself more and more and just overall hated my life, living situation, being away from my best friend and not being closer to where I was raised. I spent my late teen years and emerging twenties chasing a false sense of comfort I thought I lost in my childhood. I thought the only way I could get it back was to run from my present, unknowingly going backwards, it never worked and I felt wronged and resentful over how my life was leading. As deeply uninterested as I was in others around me at my work someone somehow managed to wake my interest and make me think differently. For some reason I still try to understand, something about him made me question and confront myself and my beliefs, and for an even wilder reason I thought if I had a chance with him that I really needed to be better and stop wallowing in my own pity, stop letting my bad moods keep me unapproachable, just generally not be the human embodiment of my pain and not be the person my loved ones were always concerned for. I had the realization that if i wanted something nice then I needed to take care of myself, be more patient with myself, and believe I actually deserved something good if I wanted to be able to care for another. A realization I’m still grateful I chose to pursue today. The thing with trying to handle years of trauma and undo every terrible belief and self destructive habit you taught yourself to cope is that it absolutely can’t be done alone, after never even earnestly attempting recovery in my life i thought i could carry this unmeasurable weight I’d accumulated and try to ‘fix’ myself on my own. I made a lot of mistakes, was presumptuous, unclear, naive, strange, the list goes on. After months of self reflection, and some genuine progress mixed with some failed attempts at communicating myself properly I hit complete burnout. It was discouraging to see how I ended up back deep in my depression and anxiety, feeling sick, stuck, suicidal, especially after trying my hardest to show myself some empathy and actually seeing growth. As I’ve talked about in the past few months I finally reached out for help, went to inpatient psychiatric care, started medication, did intensive outpatient therapy for a little over a month and have been regularly attending traditional therapy since. It’s the best thing I’ve ever done for myself in my life. The genuine peace and patience I feel for life and myself is something I never could have imagined achieving, especially in just shy of a years time. I’m really happy and proud of myself for the person I’m turning out to be. The pain it took to get to this point was hell, it felt endless until it wasn’t. I’m understanding that recovery is an ongoing process, but one I fully believe I have what it takes to manage.

As for the boy I feel helped spark this unimaginable growth, it just doesn’t seem to be happening, and i can finally say I’m okay with that. Ive learned tough lessons and harsh truths throughout my life through cruel and unjust means and this wasn’t one of those. I can honestly say I’m grateful for how this year has transpired, I’m grateful I learned what I have this way, I’ll always have a soft spot for him, I felt a range of untapped emotion I didn’t know I was capable of, i would’ve very much loved to express this to him and what it’s all meant to me, but I think what I’ve gained is fulfilling in and of itself. I operate from a more loving and faithful place. I didn’t have to burn bridges or hurt others to get here and that’s something I’m very proud of. I’m doing things the best way I can, the way I want to, it’s tough, it requires endless patience, but it’s been immensely rewarding. It’s been an odd year, one I had no idea would ever turn out this way, I’m a little tired but I’m okay and it’s been worth it in more ways than I could say

#text #very long post #felt like I can finally look back and see this moment in its full

[worldwithoutmiracles]

ADHD Coping Strategies

these are the things that have actually genuinely worked for me. I’m not guaranteeing they will work for you (I hope they do!) but I am guaranteeing I will not put “buy a planner” on this list.

okay, I know I said no planner talk, but I am religious about my phone calendar app. I put everything in there the second it occurs to me - appointments, sure, but also vague things like “call Grandma” or “post office?”. seeing it on a calendar instead of a list works better for my brain. whenever something I need to take care of within x amount of time occurs to me, it gets written down. I have stopped mid-sentence to pull out my phone and schedule “shower” for the next day (can you believe it took 28 years to get diagnosed lol). the key is not what tool you use, it’s finding one that is convenient, and then not being ashamed to use it (and never telling yourself “oh, I’ll remember without writing it down”)

let one task bleed into another, and try to separate your body from your brain. this one is huge for me, and might be tough to describe. basically, when I am avoiding a task and stuck in a phone scroll loop, I cannot get my brain to switch from Task A to Task B - it just won’t happen. so I try to bypass the switch altogether. I try not to consciously think of “starting” anything, and I bring Task A with me as I move a little. so, I’m sitting around rewatching a YouTube video, avoiding a shower (you know the mood). without thinking about the shower, I will continue to watch YouTube, but just stand up. basically, I don’t tell myself “okay, I’m stopping now” and “okay, time to start!” I just sort of...blend the two together. ease the transition. I’m still scrolling through twitter, but I move from the couch to the floor to prepare to work out. the TV show is on and I’m still watching as I move toward the kitchen. without me noticing, Task B has started, and with the worst behind me, I can finish doing it. (I can also sometimes just make my body do things physically without engaging my mind, but this might be an acquired skill and doesn’t work every day. mentally, I’m still in bed, but physically I’m now standing in the bathroom, huh weird, better start getting ready for the day.)

care about how you feel as much as you care about what you do. due to low self-esteem, I seem to think it’s okay for me to spend literal DAYS in agony because I can’t do a 15 minute task. when you think about it, it’s such a cruel and narrow way to live. why am I okay with feeling afraid and guilty all day, but I’m not okay with just giving myself permission to put this task off until tomorrow (or even just sitting down and doing it now, so I can feel happy and proud for the rest of the day)? why do I see my life as just an endless series of to-do lists instead of an experience to be lived with joy and by my own values?

separate moral judgements from your actions. this is a HUGE thing that came up for me in therapy. I am always judging myself as a good or bad person based on, like, productivity and my to-do list? which is so stupid. and I know, consciously, it is stupid. but I also, unconsciously, think about myself in these terms ALL THE TIME. my therapist started pointing out every time I used “should” or “supposed to” when I spoke, and it was almost every sentence. I’m always acting like I’m performing for some moral authority, like I’m being graded (burnt out gifted kids who were raised Catholic say ‘heyyy’). you are a good person. you need to find a way to make yourself believe that without an outside authority.

subdivide the day into smaller chunks. if I meant to get out of bed and run errands at 8 AM, and it’s now 1 PM and I’m stuck in a shame spiral and haven’t left my bed, it’s easy for me to just write the day off as fucked and give up. it’s really, really powerful if you can stop measuring time in units as large as a day. generally, I like to think of the day as split up into 4 segments. now, if I waste the morning and afternoon, that’s okay! I can turn the day around now and decide to make the 3rd or 4th part of the day better. shower at 3 PM and put on clean clothes like you just woke up. run errands at 7 PM if the store is still open. write the email at 2 AM (and schedule it to be sent at a normal time - shhh night email is my little secret). just begin again. you can always begin again, any time.

please, for the love of god, find ways to be nice to yourself, to consider the best possible scenario, to forgive yourself, to believe, truly, that you don’t deserve to be sad and scared and stressed all of the time. your life should not be something you feel you are avoiding or missing out on. please imagine a better life for yourself, and take the time to remind yourself that you deserve goodness and kindness and grace, especially from yourself. be gentle.

medication and therapy. I know this isn’t feasible for a lot of people - I couldn’t afford it for a decade. but if you have the means and have just been putting it off because “it’s not that bad”, please go. I thought I was doing “fine” because I had been worse. meanwhile, I had stopped even imagining my life could be better. turns out my “fine” was leagues below where I deserved to be and how I could feel about myself.

becoming aware of the way I think about myself has been such a powerful tool for managing my symptoms over the last few years. it often feels like my lack of productivity makes me feel bad, but the reality is my symptoms worsen when I already have something I feel fearful, anxious, or ashamed of, so thinking about the way I think has helped me tremendously.

sorry I can only write long posts. 

#adhd #actually adhd #adult adhd #neurodiverse #neurodiversity #text #note to myself for later

[astorythatwritesitself]

Hell why not I’ll roll again: shrios sorry brainrot + Only Poppies Grow Where I Last Saw You

Contemplating this as Halcyon plays, clearly this is supposed to be the angst mines, right?

... anyway this immediately puts me in the mind of my like - one of my little monkey's paw 'Thane Lives' scenarios for post ME3 - man's alive and well, but Adrian's.

Officially. MIA.

Realistically, presumed dead by virtually everyone except like a third of current/former Normandy crew, and Thane is... well, both channeling his grief and doing what he can to confirm things one way or another; he's on Earth, aiding the search for bodies, and perhaps, survivors. The blast from the Catalyst has severely fucked most tech, so it's a long, tricky job. Heartbreaking - but occasionally, almost miraculous, it can be like seeing the dead come back to life.

And yet he does not - cannot - believe the reports from a seaside camp, that they found Commander Shepard washed in with the tide.

That's what the dogtags say, anyway; and while lab tests against prior samples are a bust due to records getting scrambled, they do have both elder Shepards present to test DNA against, and it is a match. And - look, a full on clone couldn't fool Thane, he knows it's her.

Which, great! Cause that makes one of them!

Yeah, while there's a little bit of patchy recall - she recognizes her parents and Joker fairly ok & feels some empty recognition towards her crewmates- it's very quickly apparent that Adrian's lost most of her memory prior to like, her very early 20s. So, you know, very fun times for everyone involved, particularly the guy who's already been half mourning and trying not to totally lose himself in what memories were there - now she's there, but sees him as little more than a stranger. 🙃

And beyond that - the general consensus is, well, try to fix that, right? But there's a few members of the crew (Joker, Ashley & Tali, probably) who are hesitant - and Thane is trying to figure out how to articulate that forcing Adrian to remember would be straight up cruel, and yes it's painful but gods be damned, he loves her and knows what it's like to keep reliving the worst day of your life, if Shepard can finally have some peace, then let her.

Shepard, meanwhile, is like. Mostly focused on physically recovering and re-learning how to walk after having about half her body rebuilt again, and doesn't have any helpful answers regarding the mental part of her recovery. On the one hand: clearly she is Someone Important, these people hanging around seem to Mean Something, and even if she can't remember why... there's that hollow little ache every time she sees them, like taking a step without realizing you're going over an edge (to badly quote lemony snicket lol).

On the other: the bits she's picked up of Shepard's life sound like way more of a burden than she wants to bear. So, she politely yet firmly asks everyone to fuck the hell off for a little while and let her breathe for a few.

It could just end there...

but I'm a sucker lol. The setup lets Thane still be around as Adrian’s recovering, and as she has some time to just. Fucking rest for once without a bajillion nightmares, she decides... yeah, if things return naturally, fine, she'll take it. But if Shepard’s life was half as fucked up as it feels, just learning them as facts without the experience recall, she'd rather let that go.

That doesn't mean she's necessarily letting the people go, though; it becomes a sorta slice of life/recovery fic, Adrian slowly re-learning about the people in her life and how those relationships might or might not change -

But also a strange, sweet little journey with Thane. He remembers plenty of course, and tries to keep his distance at first because yeah he's alright at looking calm but internally his emotions are a wreck... but it's almost like the first time, quick talks that stretch a little longer, not-at-all subtle looks (Adrian may not recall much, but her tastes haven't changed & she's still weak for dark eyes and a cool coat lol); support when some things do start coming back - Akuze does return, a few scattered pieces through the first battle of the Citadel, some elements of Virmire - but relatively muted, compared to how they affected her before.

She never does remember their first courtship, but she likes spending time with Thane after all, especially once she's cleared to start getting some time outside - he's sweet, good to talk to, and she did very much appreciate that he seemed willing from the start to accept if she didn’t want to focus on recovering things. Idk man just increasing Soft moments, and yes it hurts Thane, knowing the Shepard who awoke him is essentially dead... but he's coming at it this time with a different perspective too, no longer expecting to die any time between now and next Tuesday, y’know? It's not like he's quite exactly the same man Shepard left on the Citadel.

So it's different - but maybe a bit of a gift, getting to fall in love all over again and dream of a future together from the very start.

#shep tag #ask #korblez #shrios #SORRY IT'S ALL OVER THE PLACE im cursed by the tired sleepy #also somewhere in there: Adrian in a Funk & thane just 'ok all protocol be damned i have an idea' & just #breaks her out of the hospital to go to the seaside for a bit & he gets to see the unabashed /adoration/ she has for it #that. was there before but also yknow beaten down by. -gestures at ME series- #and by 'unabashed adoration' i mean the man gets an hour long infodump about ocean facts #then gets to explain why a pretty seashell makes her Extremely Sad but y'know #anyway i'm a simple beast I project my severe memory issues onto every character of mine ever

[notisanto]

— 𝐇𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐲𝐚𝐦𝐚 𝐊𝐚𝐨𝐫𝐮

Fluff/slight anxious feeling/moment with Kaoru to let him know his loved and corresponded… (and kissy moment with Kaoru at the end)

— You’re the owner of a Cafe, which has been going through a rough time. Curiosity is a very strong feeling, specially when a man with a incredible white suit stars coming around to the place. Curiosity killed the cat, they say! Would you get involved with him?

(This is how I wanted to make a headcanon about Kaoru and ended up with a one shot🧍‍♀️)

It has been some time since you started dating this well known yakuza. You two got to know each other at the cafe Kaoru frequently went to, you were the one who would get close to the table he was at, besides the other girls who also gave him the attention (and , but one thing is certain, he would speak to them to tell them his usual without even looking at then, he just played with the Menu or the bottoms of his glamorous purple shirt.

One day, one of the workers who usually frequent Kaoru’s table was late, and he already arrived to ask for his usual.

Being pushed around by your workmates wasn’t your cup of tea to say the least, specially hearing the screeching whispering -Screaming in your ears telling you to go and take his order. Is not that you’re afraid of him or anything, it was intriguing actually! It’s not everyday you get to see someone look so intimidating.

Making your way to the man, you stood at the side of the table, putting on your best "I was forced to do this, but I don’t wanna lose my job" voice.

First, he looked at you, and something felt weird about it, this was not suppose to happen.

"What would you recommend?" He asked while resting his face on his fist, looking straight into your eyes. Sharp, that’s perfect to describe his eyes.

Days went by, and you were now put by the most of the workers at the cafe to take care of the yakuza.

(And it actually didn’t go badly)

You got to know him as the time passed. He leaves very generous tips, and with generous I mean it SERIOUSLY. You even got to pay all your debt’s, of course when this first happened you thought that he might actually drop it accidentally and he didn’t notice, so you waited for the next day for him to appear. You were so nervous, that was a whole package of cash to had in your hands, how can someone have so much money?!

"I’ll never accept back the money or kindness that I give out."

Even by his words, you still tried to give him back the money he left. It was just too much…

You would spend days just watching the cash laying on your table and thinking if it was worthy or some kind of cruel joke, at the end you ended up using it when things weren’t that good around you. And it was just as if he was informed somehow and he would leave the tip again. One day it was not only the tips, sometimes he would ask you to sit with him to talk, he asks about how have you been and some other things to know more about you.

Between those talks you confronted him about the money and he would just lightly snort while looking at you and resting his hands on his thighs.

Exhaling, he seems to think for a moment before answering. "I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable with that. But I do things with a purpose… for me it’s just leaving a tip.

"It’s not only that… I appreciate it, but that’s too much"

He just looked straight at you, almost analyzing. He taped his fingers against the table softly and proceeded to ask. "Has it helped you?"

You searched for comfort while looking around the place, appreciating that the place he usually chose was kind of blocking the view for others, specially to your workmates.

"I would be lying if I said no, sir…" you responded facing him.

"Drop the formalities, there’s nothing to worry about… name’s Kaoru. Hanayama Kaoru."

Since that moment, you made a friend, someone to rely on, but soon to become lovers…

You two talked almost every time he came to the cafe, you actually guessed that he may be putting on excuses just to come to the cafe.

"It’s just that I like the pastry that you sell here"

"Kaoru but you have only ordered drinks…"

At the end he let you know that he would only come to see you. That day was your favorite, thinking about going back in time only to have him say again that it was for you.

One night it was your turn to close the Cafe, you were surprised that Kaoru didn’t even arrive today, thinking about calling him, you had an uncomfortable feeling on your stomach. Maybe something happened? Should I call him? He gave you he’s card number so you could reach to him at any time, you remembered when a friend of yours warned you about him after he saw the card that was in your hand.

"You don’t know who that man is?! Be careful you! He’s a yakuza, man’s got a whole group out there trying to get a piece of him… Do not get involved with him! Gods know what would happen, Y/N…

You really got your doubts, you were drowning in them. You thought about him that he might have a very good position at some company, but not being a yakuza…

Of course there was the worrying feeling in your chest moving side to side, but also the adrenaline making your body shake, and the fluttering of your heart that would take over you while being around him without even caring about his hours out of the cafe. It’s just enjoying being close to him…

Not going further with the thoughts, you found yourself jumping in your place, hearing the door of the cafe being abruptly opened, only to take a deep breath when the well dressed man walked inside the place, searching with his gave around while accommodating his hat (that looked like a version of his classic suit).

The rain doing his job with leaving Kaoru’s clothes drenched, but thank god he was covered with a large black gabardine.

"Oh my, Kaoru!" You walked to him to take a closer look at him, almost searching for any injury. He seemed relieved when he spotted you, watching make your way to him.

— Sorry I didn’t pick my usual today… I had to deal with some things at work.

He said looking at you, he seemed kinda gland, he had those glossy eyes again and that pretty little smirk on his plump lips. You on the other hand were trying to remember if there was enough towels to cover him up, why does he have to be so gigantic?!

— If there was so much trouble in your workplace why did you come? You know it’s okay if you don’t have your usual everyday, besides, trying to catch a cold just for a drink… Is even that good?

You lost yourself at the tornado of thoughts, maybe being around him isn’t that good if I’m going to be feeling this way…

Before you could keep on complaining, hands were placed at the sides of your face. Looking up at him, his face was even closer, his eyes were calm… it washed your body with a warm, feeling so small in front of him. Detailing and appreciating each part of your face, he thought about how beautiful you looked, he knew some time ago that you were holding his heart on your hands, and you take such a good care with it.

Caressing your cheek bones with his thumbs so softly he wanted to spill his feelings right there, but the feeling of you might getting scared of him was painful, but he’ll respect it if that’s your decision…

Your hands were on his wrists, making your way to try and cup his hands, the numbness in your mind got you getting closer to him,

Does he… want what I want? Is it ok? Is any of this ok?

Plagued with questions, he freed you from those insecurities giving what both craved most. His lips against yours felt so sweet, the contrast between his cold ones and yours, flushed together. That big scar that comes across his lips wasn’t even a bother, but just for a second you separated from him just to leave a slow but chaste kiss on the corner of his lips. His breath quicken for a moment, you thought that he might pull away from you but that kiss would not end there. Picking you up from the ground by putting his arm around your waist, you found yourself being at his height, your feet comically balancing in the air only to be pulled again into a kiss.

Your arms find their way around the back of his neck, hugging him, getting to feel the hardness of his chest agains yours, not having enough consciousness to even worry about your clothes getting wet too, too occupied to notice Kaoru’s hat falling to the ground. When the time came to separate, you were just too happy to finally have shown your feelings. Leaving more kisses around his face, a smile growing on Kaoru’s face with each kiss, noticing, you tried to let him know how happy you were right now.

— … I didn’t thought that this was going to end up like this.

He whispered, his voice being so deep that it sends shivers all around your body.

— Is it bad?

He looked at you surprised, only to catch you with that playful expression on your face which you failed at hiding. Smiling, he placed a kiss to your cheek and another close to the ear.

— I just needed a moment to look at you…

#baki hanma #baki the grappler #hanayama #kaoru hanayama #anime #hanayama kaoru #hanayama kaoru headcanons #kaoru hanayama headcanons #hanayama headcanons #kaoru headcanons #hanayama kaoru one shot #kaoru hanayama one shot #hanayama one shot #kaoru one shot #hanayama kaoru x s/o #kaoru hanayama x s/o #hanayama x s/o #kaoru x s/o #im falling asleep #story #hanma

[allthingsencanto]

I cannot express how much I love the near opening scene with Mirabel and Abuela, the scene where she sadly tells her granddaughter to step aside and let the family do what they need to do. Sounds weird to say I love a scene that’s as sad and toxic as this? Well I love it for an important reason, a reason that I think a LOT of people overlook, and I mean a LOT.

This scene is more important than people think, and no, not just because of how toxic Alma was here. For starters I’ll say the obvious, one of the reasons why I do love it is because you feel SO damn bad for Mirabel here, the pain in her face, the way she tries to keep a smile, even though her own grandmother who she loves very much is not seeing her worth at all, and practically telling her to stay out of the way. It’s the starting point of Abuela’s toxic behavior for the audience, as well as the starting point for the audience to know just how much Mirabel is struggling with this title of not having a gift. Heck, it’s even more sad because we all know that Mirabel wasn’t doing anything wrong in this scene, she was just trying to make beautiful decorations for each of her family members. It really gets to you as the audience, it makes you feel for Mirabel, and of course, heavily dislike Alma with the film making you realize that she isn’t really the thoughtful and generous woman we saw in the very beginning. HOWEVER, now we’re on to the MAIN reason why I love this scene, the important reason that almost the entire fandom overlooks and doesn’t really seem to comprehend. I chose this pic of Alma because the focus is on her, not Mirabel. So are you ready? Here we go…..

The main reason why I love this scene, the main reason why this scene is SO important is because Alma was NOT DELIBERATELY trying to be cruel towards Mirabel here, and she honestly NEVER was. Now before people jump at me and wring my neck, yes….I KNOW that does not in ANY shape or form whatsoever excuse ANY of her actions. What Alma did was wrong, and it will always BE wrong, wether she had ill intentions or not. HOWEVER…..my point still stands, and the reason why I say all of this is because the fandom ALWAYS acted like Abuela HATED Mirabel’s guts, despising her for not having a gift and……that’s just not true guys, so let me explain why this scene is so special. In this scene where Abuela confronts Mirabel after she puts the decorations out for Antonio’s upcoming gift ceremony, I want people to just LOOK at Alma here, pay attention to her. Look at her facial expressions, her body language, her voice. If you do, (which is something I don’t think the fandom did pay attention to) is that she is a NOT stern here, in fact, this is the only scene in the entire movie of modern Alma, where she is NOT stern towards Mirabel. Her face, her voice, it all kills me, because the truth is, she’s being gentle, she’s being soft spoken and most importantly, she’s being GENUINE. When she starts the conversation, she speaks to Mirabel in a kind way, instead of demanding. She says “Maybe you should leave the decorations to…someone else?” Instead of dismissing her immediately. After Mirabel accidentally catches Alma’s decoration on fire, that’s when Alma puts it straight, telling her that she knows she wants to help, but she wants the ceremony to go perfect, because everyone relies on them, more importantly, their gifts. Again, makes you feel really bad for Mirabel I know, because it’s clear that Alma at all isn’t being considerate of her granddaughters feelings, and insensitivity tells her to step aside, but the important thing is HOW she does it. You can clearly tell that how gentle her voice is, how her facial expressions are, you can tell that she isn’t TRYING to be mean, and what’s more important, she clearly doesn’t KNOW she’s being mean. When she’s telling Mirabel to step aside, even if it’s a mean thing, you can tell she means it in the best way, even if it’s not. The biggest thing worth mentioning is that after Mirabel nods her head in response, the camera pans back to Alma, and before she notices Pepa’s cloud, you can see a SMILE on her face, in response to Mira showing that she understands.

And this gets me because it’s not even a sinister or negative smile, it’s a soft, happy smile. To me, it shows that Abuela is thankful for Mira accepting what she said, and the reason I bring this up is because this scene ALONE shows you that even though Abuela was in the wrong, even though she’s stern and strict and her behavior towards Mirabel is not okay, people STILL need to understand that Abuela DOES love Mirabel. I thought it wouldn’t be that hard to comprehend, but apparently like I said before, so many people interpret Alma as someone who hated Mirabel to the core, and I absolutely loathe that because y’all are wrong, I’m sorry. This of course falls into how people see Alma as a one note stereotypical bitch instead of the complex layered woman she is, and it always irks me. Abuela NEVER hated Mirabel, nor did Abuela not LOVE Mirabel. We clearly see in the opening scene how close the two were when she was sharing the story of the miracle to her then 5 year old granddaughter, and even though their relationship changed for the worse after Mirabel didn’t get her gift, even though Alma’s brain slowly turned stern and toxic over the years, doesn’t mean that Abuela deep down didn’t care for Mirabel. Sure she was stern, and yes, you could argue that the film was leaning towards the reveal that Abuela didn’t really see Mirabel as part of the family anymore, but she never WANTED to be mean to Mira, it’s just how her toxic mindset had become. And no, I’m again not excusing ANYTHING, but some of y’all really need to stop acting like Alma downright loathed her granddaughter. The whole point of the film was that Alma didn’t see Mirabel’s WORTH. She didn’t see that Mirabel was fine the way she was, that she didn’t need a gift to be accepted. Alma herself painted the other family members as their gifts, so since Mirabel has none, her toxic mindset just couldn’t SEE her, and while that is Alma’s own fault, this scene in particular shows you that she does care about her granddaughter, she’s just blind, and doesn’t know that what she’s doing is wrong. In Alma’s perspective, she’s just telling Mirabel to step aside, and caring for her family, making sure everything is in check. Of course though, in OUR perspective, she’s being cruel and insensitive, which is true, but again, what is this film about? PERSPECTIVE. I said this scene was important because she isn’t TRYING to be mean, she doesn’t know that what she’s saying is deeply hurting Mirabel, all she sees herself as is someone who is taking good care of her family, and that’s it, and guess what? People need to accept that. There are real life toxic people in the world, and some of them don’t KNOW they’re being toxic, because their brain is convincing them otherwise. This scene perfectly shows you that Alma is complex, it’s not like she had harsh intentions here, or hated Mirabel, she just can’t see her worth as I’ve said, which only makes the scene where Mirabel blows up at her the more satisfying, because Alma had finally gotten the wake up call she needed to truly learn that she was in the wrong.

So that’s why this scene is so important my friends. Even though we all know Alma was in the wrong, the fact that she wasn’t purposely trying to be cruel here, the fact that she spoke softly and as kindly as someone like her could speak, the fact that she smiles to Mira even though what she said was so wrong therefor showing us that SHE herself doesn’t know that she’s in the wrong, proves that she’s not a one note character who simply hates on Mirabel because she doesn’t have a gift. She’s MORE than that, so much more, and even though none of us condone her behavior, I think it’s worth appreciating that she isn’t shallow, and never had the intention to be.

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