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jahayla-parker · 2 years

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The Dark War: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: 11.3k wc, Reader is Wanda’s little sister. And like her sister, she’d had her fair share of struggles. Including watching her sister and boyfriend Peter “die” from Thanos’s snap, being cared for by Tony only for him to die getting the others back, losing Peter again after NWH, and all of her existence being corrupted by Wanda after she takes the Darkhold.

Warnings: mentions of trauma, PTSD, death, blood, fighting scenes, curse words.

Request: Tysm! May I please request some angst between Peter Parker x maximoff! reader, (y/n) is the younger sister of Wanda and even has the same powers as her. . (Y/n) didn’t even blipped in Infinity War when Thanos snapped his fingers. She was terrified at that time and the one who took care of her was Tony. She nearly did enslave a town just to have a fake reality but Tony was there to comfort her. After the events of Endgame, where (y/n)’s sister went missing after Tony’s funeral and they were invited by their classmates at the Avengerscon. they both didn’t even wear costumes because they were still trying to get over Tony’s death. Now, Peter and (y/n) promises not to leave one another. Even though in No Way Home, after Dr. Strange Spell was performed. Peter left her to keep her safe while (y/n) was corrupted by the Darkhold because of Wanda’s doing. Oh I think the ending is (y/n) never remembered Peter and when (y/n) finds out about Wanda wanted to harm America. (y/n) wants to stop Wanda, that's why Wanda mind controlled (y/n) and even changed her memories which results in corrupting her mind. i would love some lovers to enemies trope. By: @oyasumimosura

If the order/flow seems off at first, it’ll make sense, plus it is done to show Peter and y/n recalling their experiences in real time.

———

“I really don’t see why we need to be here” y/n gripes, tugging on the strings on her hoodie.

Well, Peter’s hoodie she was wearing; but, still.

“May said it’ll help us look at the positives of the job” Peter sighed, rubbing her back.

Y/n turned to him, a small frown on her face but nodded.

He gave her a sympathetic smile and secured his arm around her waist as they continued walking into the AvengerCon building.

Y/n froze as soon as she pushed door open and screams were all she could hear.

There was no way anyone recognized her or Peter as neither were in the mood to put on their suits.

The couple had been through a lot lately.

———

When Thanos did his snap, Peter blipped.

To make matters worse, y/n had to watch it happen right before her as his body in her universe seemed to disintegrate in her hands.

At the time she had no way of knowing he’d be back, or that anyone who disappeared was still alive.

The grief of that battle was unbearable.

She lost her older sister Wanda, who raised y/n since she was an infant.

She also lost her sister Wanda’s partner Vision who’d become like an older brother to y/n.

But at least Wanda had Vision.

Y/n wasn’t so fortunate because in audition to countless family members, coworkers, fellow Avengers, friends, and classmates blipping… she also lost Peter.

She’d been holding his hands tightly in her’s as he fought to stay with her, both of them crying and visibly shaking; but it hadn’t been of any use.

She also lost May, MJ, Ned, and so many others.

But even when combined none hurt nearly as much as Wanda’s and Peter’s perceived deaths.

Tony had been the only one who took the initiative to step up and help y/n.

Everyone was dejected after the battle and while Tony tried to coax y/n into returning to the headquarters with him to determine their next steps, she couldn’t.

It felt as if her brain was on fire.

She kept seeing their deaths before her very eyes over and over as if someone was performing some sick vivid puppet marionette show inside her brain.

It began as soon as the snap ceased and everyone took in what had happened.

They knew it was a possibility; hence why they were there in the first place.

Y/n knew she very well could have died that day.

She’d considered and prepared for that.

But what y/n hadn’t considered was watching her only remaining family and the love of her life disappear before her.

She felt powerless and her body shut down.

She wished her brain would follow suit so that the flashbacks would stop.

But they didn’t and she knew Tony had been working on some therapy glasses for his own PTSD and she didn’t want him to know and try them on her.

He wouldn’t do anything to intentionally hurt her, but she also didn’t want to risk losing the last pieces of her loved ones she had left; even if it was just the memory of their deaths.

As painful as it was, it allowed her to see them; to feel a nonexistent version of them present.

She knew it was all in her mind.

It was one of the downsides of her and Wanda’s powers.

Everything they saw -whether in reality, peoples’ fears, their own nightmares, or something else- was remarkably graphic and detailed.

It was nice when it came to happy memories, but when it came to challenges and turmoil it became a heavy burden.

While anyone in their position would have PTSD or other trauma symptoms from what happened that day, the mental picture would be infinitely more severe and aggressive in y/N’s mind.

She was only a teenager when it happened, when she felt as if she’d watched her life turn to dust around her rather than the bodies of those she cared about.

She knew denying Tony’s offer of support was inconsiderate and futile but she desired isolation.

She wanted to get as far away from the loved ones she still had left because what she wanted to do was not going to be safe.

She wanted to get home and find a safe place to let out her anger and pain.

Following the battle, she used her powers and fled the scene and returned to New York.

Her flight had been done subconsciously as her brain was still beating itself up with the visions of the battle that night.

As a result, she hadn’t realized her subconscious mind led her back to a familiar place.

Consciously she had intended to land on one of the uninhabited small islands just outside of NY, where she would be safe to scream, cry, throw her energy blasts and have them land in the surrounding water rather than on people, etc.

However, that plan was ruined the moment her feet hit the ground outside of her house.

Still in costume, she numbly walked through the streets her and Peter used to walk on a daily basis.

She decided if her own brain would let her release her pain the way she wanted, she might as well just go through the motions and ignore what she was feeling.

A voice in her mind kept screaming that the concept was easier said than done, especially if she wasn’t going to let Tony help with the flashbacks she was already having less than a few hours after.

Plus, she wasn’t even sure what those motions were.

Was her brain wanting her to somehow heal, release the chaos inside her, or what?

However, she no longer cared.

The pain inside of her was far too great to think about anything else other than wanting some kind of relief.

She still had a small strand of cognitive function left that allowed her to remain in control around the citizens of NY.

Many of whom eyed her as she walked down the street in her torn and dirty costume, blood dripping down her face from a cut she sustained above her eye.

She could tell some were relieved, glad to see at least one Avenger had made it through whatever had happened.

She wanted to hit the ground under them with so much force it would knock them all down so they understand she wasn’t the one they needed to have survived.

After all, she had been unable to do anything as millions of people died within seconds.

The world deserved better than her and her failed attempts to keep them safe; to keep Wanda and Peter safe.

Others watched her in horror or anger, their blaming of her projected in their icy stares and balled fists.

Y/n kept taking choked breaths of air as she kept her eyes on the ground beneath her feet.

She couldn’t blame them or their anger, they were right; she was at fault.

Most people though seemed to be lost in their own worlds, hurting and grieving for those who disappeared.

Some people were posting missing flyers, others talking to police officers about trying to find their loved ones, etc.

Y/n fought the urge to crumble the ground and let the balled up powers she’d been resisting release.

How could they all be so dense?!

She wanted to scream that their loved ones were dead. Not missing, dead.

How could people not see that?

She had literally watched and felt Peter’s body turn to cremations before her.

How is that missing?!

She shook her head and pushed on, hoping to get to the train station and then decide where to go.

She didn’t even know what she was to do anymore or where she was to go.

But behind the painful scenes playing behind her eyes still, barely noticeable beneath the shared sobs from her and Peter, was a longing sensation.

She had the memory of that night, but she needed more.

She needed something to cling onto that reminded her of him.

Technically everything reminded her of him.

But she needed something that was special to the two of them, something that would elicit such a joyous memory that it might pause the echoing one currently playing.

Her hands shook as she let her subconscious mind lead her unstable legs towards the stop number it wanted.

It was pointless, the subway cars had stopped moving as people panicked.

She sighed and rested her body against a support as she hesitantly looked at the sign to see where she was going.

The burning in her chest grew as fresh tears rolled down her cheeks.

Of course.

The irony made her want to laugh had it not been for the pain.

She was headed to Tony.

Well, to Stark Headquarters anyways.

That had been where she and Peter first met.

————

They both, although neither one was believable, lied about being interns for Tony rather than part of his team.

It hadn’t taken more than a few days before Tony introduced the two, exposing their lies towards the other.

From that moment on, they agreed to not attempt to lie to one another again.

A promise they’d kept…

Until today.

Y/n had begun to attend school with Peter instead of just homeschooling in order to benefit from them science and mathematics program they had.

Therefore, she and Peter had been on the bus together when his Spidey senses (or Peter tingle as May often joked) were activated.

She and Peter promptly made eye contact and silently agreed to get Ned to cause a distraction so they could handle whatever was going on.

When they made it to where Tony was that morning, after much resistance on Tony’s part, he promoted them to discuss the seriousness of the issue together as he had with Pepper previously.

Y/n and Peter promised, as they always did, that they were in this together and no matter what happened they’d accept the procedures and outcome and move on.

When exchanging these promises, they’d mostly referred to not holding grudges over something the other did during the fight (usually when one would panic about the other’s safety being risked in order to do that behavior).

The outcome part had meant that even if the villain got away, they would accept it as it was an move on without blaming themselves or each other.

They started to make these promises years earlier at Tony’s suggestion.

He’d picked up on their relationship and connection before even the two of them did.

He knew the wreckage this line of work could cause and he wanted to help them prevent it.

The self blame aspect had been a big issue for them both at the time, something Tony knew very well.

However, he wanted them to also agree to not blame each other for the outcome.

He knew just how easy it could be to convince yourself to blame someone for the things you saw and did on this job.

Peter and y/n began the promises out of obligation but as time went on they soon understood the importance of it.

While they’d not been on many missions for the avengers directly, they’d had side projects for Tony and around their neighborhoods they worked on together.

Tony had been right, it was easy to want someone to blame when things didn’t go right; whether that was yourself or the other person.

These promises helped them stay accountable to the other person all because of their decision to not lie to each other again; and to them, breaking a promise was doing just that.

Therefore, immediately prior to taking on the wrinkly purple giant named Thanos, the two had promised this once again to each other.

The scene unfolded before her as she recalled staring into his beautiful eyes and holding his hand intently.

As she watched Peter tell her he promised, she sobbed loudly in present time, feeling a wave of guilt take over her.

She’d broken her promise to him.

She’d lied to him.

To be fair, she had no idea at that moment what she was truly promising.

She didn’t know she would be promising to accept the fact that he died.

That was never part of the plan or the promise, right?

She supposed in some way, it was.

While neither felt comfortable admitting it was a constant possibility in their work, they both knew it was.

That’s why they’d made the promise right?

Knowing that it might all go to shit.

That the outcome could be something devastating.

However, not even in her darkest moments did she ever truly believe she’d watch Peter die.

That she’d watch her sister Wanda die.

Wanda had shown y/n how to use her powers in such a profound way it made y/n confident that she would, could, do whatever it took to keep Peter safe.

She’d been willing to sacrifice her life for his, any day, at any time.

So if the fear of losing him ever creeped into her mind during these promises, she was too cocky to acknowledge them and accept their weight.

So as she watched Peter kiss her forehead after his promise and reassurance, she let her knees buckle as she fell to the cement flooring of the subway.

Not only did she let Peter down, let him die, but she also had to live with the fact she broke their promise.

The last promise they made to each other.

In fact, they’d made that promise twice today.

Once when Tony prompted but again when Peter noticed what was happening.

Promising him came as second nature to her at that point so it hadn’t even crossed her mind what exactly she was promising.

She was too caught up in the moment, in the feeling of his hands flaking and crumbling in her grip, the sight of his rosy cheeks splintering and turning to dust.

She would have told him anything, promised him anything in that moment if it eased his pain or her’s.

Instead, it caused her to now feel so much worse as the last thing she’d ever say to him was a lie.

There wasn’t even any choice in the matter.

She couldn’t keep the promise.

She couldn’t not blame herself for what happened.

After all, she’d survived but he didn’t.

It wasn’t fair, it wasn’t right.

She couldn’t accept the outcome.

How could anyone expect her to?

She lost her sister and her boyfriend in a matter of minutes.

Not to mention the countless other people she cared about.

And she sure as hell couldn’t move on.

In fact that notion made her want to throw up whatever was left in her stomach.

She couldn’t live a life without Peter.

A life without Wanda.

And certainly not a life without either of them.

The longing within her that had pulled her to the subway station in the first place intensified as she nervously racked her brain to find a way to feel their presence.

She knew she’d never get over the guilt of breaking this promise to Peter, but it couldn’t be avoided.

She refused to accept it and move on; whether that was selfish or not.

———

“Hey, are you okay?” Someone asked, causing y/n to return to the present moment.

One in which she found herself curled up in a ball, her face smashed against the cold disgusting cement, hands pulling at her hair, as sobs shook her body.

Taking several ragged breaths to calm herself enough to uncurl her body and remove her hands safely from her head, she forced a tight nod.

She used both hands to repeatedly tug on the hem of the top of her costume, afraid they might begin releasing energy bursts if not actively doing something else.

“I take it you lost someone” the person said quietly, looking towards the subway line.

Y/n glanced up from the ground to look at the person before her; finding a girl roughly her own age.

Wiping her eyes quickly before clenching her hands on her hem again, she sighed.

Who had this girl lost today?

The heartbreak on her face was clear and yet her she was trying to help y/n face her own losses she knew nothing of.

Y/n was supposed to be the hero.

She was the one who should be taking care of this person, even if they were the same age.

Yet, despite dressed in her superhero costume and still having her abilities, y/n felt like she might as well have been a piece of gum stuck to the floor she’d laid on moments ago.

Something everyone should just step over, or even step on.

She hadn’t felt that weak since the first day of training at the headquarters.

———

Wanda had prepared her some, but y/n was severely out skilled by the other avengers.

It took a serious hit to her confidence which only made her worse and her moves slower.

Peter had noticed her change and confronted her, shock written on his face.

When she explained what happened, he reassured her that he was in awe of her skill but still offered to help her however he could.

From that day on, she never cared what anyone else thought.

Why would she when Peter was always there to shut the self doubt and sense of inferiority down?

However, Peter was gone.

She had to face these feelings alone.

And the reason she had to, the reason he was gone, was a direct result of her incompetence.

———

“I lost my boyfriend… I think, I haven’t been able to reach him” the girl added causing the waves of panic in y/n to pause briefly as she snaps out of her dissociation.

Y/n bit her lip and tried to offer a sorrowful look towards the girl; the best comfort she could offer in her state.

“You?” The girl asked, clearly desperate for a connection in this new world.

“M-my sist-sister” y/n choked, her voice frail, “a…and… my-“.

“Oh my god!” The girl screamed, running to someone or something behind y/n.

Clumsily turning around, y/n watched as the girl embraced with a boy their age, both in glee as they pulled each other in for a kiss.

“My Peter” she whispered to herself as she closed her eyes and dug her nails into the palms of her hands in an attempt to maintain control.

Y/n rushed up the stairs of the subway entrance, nearly tripping on each step.

She took shaky breaths as she literally dragged herself towards Stark Headquarters, using anything around her to grab onto with her hands and pull herself that direction; allowing her to keep moving and also keep her hands busy.

She wasn’t sure how long it took before she reached the building, but she felt herself collapse upon the field of grass outside.

Tony’s security system alerted him to her presence and he and Happy rushed out to help her in just as the black spots in her vision merged into total darkness.

———

As she slept on his couch, Tony prompted Happy to make sure the room he had for her was ready for her arrival.

Tony had secretly designed rooms for each avenger within the facility, as he had with the former Stark Tower.

That way, should anyone need a place to stay, escape to, or simply rest after a battle they had one.

Pepper made some tea as quietly as she could, constantly glancing over to y/N’s unconscious body next to Tony.

He put his hand on her back and sighed, rubbing his other hand over his face.

“Do you think it’s her sister or the kid?” Tony asked, more to himself than anything.

“Both Tony. You know that” Pepper responded, pouring some tea into a mug for y/n.

Tony shook his head, “I never should have let them come and fight”.

“Stop. You know that wouldn’t have changed anything. The same people would have blipped. The only difference is that it would’ve happened a bit sooner had it not been for the two of them” Pepper reprimanded kindly.

Tony groaned and nodded, his guilt still not subsiding.

“I have to help her” Tony whispered.

Pepper placed the cup next to y/n on the coffee table before rubbing Tony’s shoulder, “we will.”

“I feel like crap the kid is gone” he said, still referring to Peter with the nickname he used for him since day one.

Pepper nodded, sitting on the edge of the table to be near them both.

“I can’t even imagine how she feels” he added, noting how y/n looked in pain even as she slept.

———

When she woke, it was like her body was a rubber band that had been stretched to its max before released.

Her upper body immediately snapped forward, in a dizzying pace.

She scanned the room in alarm as she tried to make sense of everything.

She knew she’d had a horrific nightmare, one where the unthinkable happened.

But she wasn’t sure how she got here, to Tony’s couch in the Stark Headquarters.

Had she been training when she suffered a concussion and he brought her here to rest?

It would explain the pain in her body, the burning in her brain, the terrible nausea and headache, and of course the nightmare.

But she couldn’t recall; although if it was a concussion that too would be explained.

“Woah, woah. Take it easy y/n” Tony suddenly said, approaching her from where he was seated on his recliner.

She squinted at him before looking around for Peter.

He had to be here somewhere.

She knew he wouldn’t leave her alone after a concussion, but where was he?

Maybe the nightmare wasn’t a nightmare after all…

No, that’s impossible.

She shook her head to try and clear her mind.

She noticed it didn’t make her dizzy or hurt the way it did after her last concussion.

She began to feel her breathing quicken as she tried to wake up more and understand what was going on.

“Y/n who… who or what are you looking for?” Tony asked, uncertain if she was awake enough to recall what happened.

“P-Peter” she said, and as soon as she did, before Tony’s face even had time to display his sorrow, she felt a tearing pain in her chest.

She scratched at her chest as tears began to form, “it… I had a nightmare… he… he…”

She stumbled with her words a bit longer before she muttered, “i-i-it wasn’t a nightmare… was it?”

She knew the answer, the pain in her whole body was screaming it at her.

But she had to hear it from someone else.

Tony was silent for a moment, hesitant to respond.

When he did, his voice broke as he struggled to keep his composure, “no. It wasn’t. He… he’s gone. They’re gone”.

Y/n pulled her feet under her butt and aggressively stood up and stepped off the couch.

She began pacing across the open living room, hands pulling at her hair.

Her eyes picked up on the color of her hair flickering by her face, the same color as Wanda’s, just as her brain caught up on her memories from earlier and her journey here.

She wanted to burst, to let whatever energy had been forming inside of her flow even if it meant it tore her apart in the process.

To Tony, the girl looked frozen in shock.

Internally she was fighting to not release the pain in here, especially after Tony had seemingly taken her in immediately when she needed.

As a result she froze her whole body as her muscles formed a metaphorical wall around the surging energy beating against them in an attempt to be released.

“Umm… Pepper said that… you might want to have some of their stuff…” Tony mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck as he approached.

“I told her it might be too soon… you know? But… she said to let you choose…” he said, looking over her face.

The resistance she was using against herself paused when the energy’s flow seemed to halt.

It was as if her brain clung on to whatever comfort Tony was trying to offer her.

He noticed her eyes refocus and look at him, making the corner of his lip curl a little.

“Here, Happy boxed some stuff and put it on your bed” he said, opening the door to what must be her new bedroom.

Ignoring the meaning behind that for the time being, she stepped in and rushed to the box on her bed.

She cautiously removed the lid, as if it was chemistry class and the contents inside were dangerous chemicals that couldn’t be mixed.

Tony watched, leaning on the doorframe as he felt himself tear up as she went through some of the items.

He noticed how careful she was with every item no matter how durable it might be, the way her eyes scanned them as if memorizing every detail, the lowering of her chest as she placed each one down and let more tears fall.

He sighed and decided to let her process her thoughts without a babysitter.

However, just as he’d made it back to the living room, he heard the most heartbreaking wail come from her room.

As he rushed to her, he saw her holding a necklace and a small note in her hand, her body on the floor, the room suddenly a mess as things had been knocked over.

Tony panicked and raced for the button to prompt his suit to fly to him, but he wasn’t fast enough.

As y/n cradled the necklace against her chest, the note firmly in her hand, her sullen eyes looked up and she soon flew out of the room.

Tony sighed as the suit finally reached him and Pepper and Happy not far behind.

“Tony. Let her go” Pepper sighed.

“What?!” He snapped, pointing towards the direction she left in.

“She’d just a child!” He argued.

She nodded, “I know. But right now she needs time to grieve. You should know first hand that sometimes that’s easier alone. She’ll be back”.

He sighed and nodded, she was right.

He couldn’t do much to help her until she’d processed what happened.

He slumped into his chair and scowled at the wall.

———

He’d sworn to keep her and Peter safe, and he’d told both Peter and Wanda he’d of course always make sure y/n was okay and safe.

Wanda made him assure her before even letting her sister near him.

Peter however, asked as he clung desperately to Tony one night when the two had gotten beat up on a mission.

Peter had never been so afraid in his life.

Y/n had managed to get hit by s stray bullet, and while she assured him it was minor, he worried constantly until she healed.

When she was getting stitched up, Tony had come to scold the two for being vigilantes but instead was faced with calming Peter down and swearing he’d take care of her no matter what.

It was something Tony had already considered and planned on, for both of them, but seeing the desperation in Peter’s eyes that night reminded him how important it was.

It somehow felt even more important now, now that she’d lost Wanda and Peter.

———

However, perhaps Pepper was right.

Maybe she would benefit from some time alone to process what happened.

He’d check on her again soon if he hadn’t heard from her in a day or two tops.

———

“Go” Pepper said, stepping out of y/N’s empty bedroom.

Tony gave her a thankful smile and kissed her softly before entering the suit he left in the living room so he wouldn’t have to wait when the time came.

He sighed and told his command to turn on the GPS tracker.

Just as he had with Peter’s, he placed a tracker in y/n’s suit for her protection.

Tony raised his eyebrow as he looked at the map that showed she was in a small town just outside of Rhode Island, unsure what lead her there.

Tony’s eyes widened in awe, horror, and downright disbelief at the sight before him.

There was this glowing dome-like feature starting to form over the rural town before them.

Y/N’s hands were still waving back and forth rapidly, causing the energy to stretch and the dome’s roof to expand to cover more of the town.

Tony wasn’t quite sure what she was doing, but he was sure it wasn’t good.

She looked in worse shape than she had been before, and the area surrounding the town was burnt to a crisp with only marks of her energy bursts left behind.

“Y/n, you need to stop” he demanded.

She paused briefly but didn’t turn to look at him before resuming her energy manipulation.

“What is it you think you’re doing?” Tony asked, trying a different approach.

“Fixing it” she said, the tone of her voice emotionless.

“Fixing what? What’s wrong with the town?” He asked.

“Nothing. That’s just it. They’re all happy and have their family and boyfriends and all of that” she said, her voice going up an octave.

Tony gulped as he looked between her and the town, “So you’re going to put them in a force shield? So they’ll be safe?”.

She didn’t respond which caused him to sigh, “That’s sweet, y/n. But it isn’t needed, they didn’t ask for this”.

“No, but they have enough to share. I’m just asking for a small part “ she frowns.

“What?” Tony questioned, not understanding what she was getting at, “share what?”.

“That happiness. I can start over here. Peter and I can have a new start. Wanda too. You can come if you want” she said, seeming far off.

“Y/n that’s not possible. I’m sorry, but they’re gone. You can start again yes, but it’ll be without them “ he frowned.

“No! I -I can’t. I won’t. I’m not doing this without them “ she said, her voice breaking as the energy over the town shook.

Tony slowly drifted to her, hoping his presence was comforting.

“Doing what, exactly? You can’t start over with them when they’re not here. So what are you doing?” He asked.

“I…I…” Tony noticed she paused as if considering her own behaviors for the first time, “I am making a new reality. One I can control. I’m tired of being unable to protect those I care about “.

Tony squeezed his eyes shut momentarily, understanding her desire but also knowing unlike him she’d be able to accomplish it due to her telepathic abilities.

“I understand. But y/n, you cannot enslave a whole town” he argued.

She glared at him, “they’d still be happy. I’m not cruel”.

“No, you’re not. Which is why I need you to ask yourself, why are you doing this?” He asked, holding up a finger as she begun to answer.

“Because Thanos took away your control hm?” He said, making her remember how Thanos used the time stone to freeze her movements as she tried to attack him.

If she’d not been frozen in time, she’d have had his gauntlet melted within seconds.

She sobbed as she nodded, the energy over the town still there but not growing.

“Because you know what it felt like to not be in control of your body, your life, your situation. It’s not fair to do that to them either” he said, his hand on her shoulder as they floated above the dome.

She turned and broke down crying in his arms as she lowered her shield over the town.

———

Every day since that night Tony had been there to help her deal with the loss of Peter and Wanda.

Morgan, Happy, and Pepper were big in her recovery as well but no one was there like Tony was.

He understood her pain in ways they hopefully ever would, he knew Peter and Wanda the best out of everyone who remained (which allowed him to comfort her and also keep her in control of her emotions got too much), and he cared for her as if she was his other daughter.

He had more than taken her under his wing that night, he made her his family and she was eternally grateful.

Which is why his death had hit her so hard.

While she was elated to have Peter and Wanda back, she now lost Tony.

The person who’d been there for her during the most painful 5 years of her life.

Sure she was happy to have her loved ones back.

But part of her was mad.

It was like he didn’t even consider what his death would do to her.

He knew how badly she was handling Peter and Wanda’s death and then he just sacrificed himself?!

But at the end of the day, the anger was really just a band-aid for void in her chest.

It was like a piece of her was gone.

Except this time, there was no genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist to undo his death the way he had theirs’.

———

“Come on” Peter sighed, having caught y/n spacing off while staring at a poster of Iron Man.

“How can you do this Peter?” She whispered, her voice cracking.

Peter frowned and pulled her to him, placing a kiss on her forehead, “I was only pushing through it for you… cause everyone said it would help. Do you want to go?”

She nodded against his chest, her hands griping the back of him.

Peter kissed her forehead again before softly guiding the two of them to the exit.

“Wait!” Someone shouted, causing them both to stop and face the voice.

Fortunately they weren’t calling for either of them.

However, as they turned back around, they can face to face with a fan dressed as the Scarlet Witch.

Y/n instinctively clung on to Peter as her eyes stung with tears.

Wanda had come back too, another result of Tony’s sacrifice.

However, she had her own burdens and left y/n behind suddenly.

———

It was the night of Tony’s funeral when she last saw her sister.

That night, y/n was curled into Peter’s side as they did their bests to comfort each other while simultaneously both grieving.

As she watched the memorial float away from the cabin, she turned to make eye contact with her sister only to find her missing.

Peter had helped her for hours until they stumbled upon a note that infuriated him.

Wanda had left, with nothing but a note saying she loved y/n and goodbye.

Peter wasn’t sure about showing her the note but he knew he couldn’t lie to her so he caved.

Ever since that night, he regretted showing her the note.

He watched as she retreated inwards and away from everyone.

He knew she no longer trusted that people wouldn’t leave her.

After all, he had, Wanda had -twice now-, Tony had, and so did many others.

It took him months to get her to believe he wasn’t going to leave her in the middle of the night as they slept; cuddled together in his twin bed at his aunt May’s house.

———

The look he saw in her eyes tonight seeing the fan dressed as her sister made him wish he was in costume so he could swing her out of there and back to their home.

“I know” he coos softly, holding her tightly to him as he takes the brunt of the bodies bumping them as they move.

“Don’t leave me please” she whimpered, hiding her face in the hood on his hoodie she had on.

“Hey, y/n, I promise you, I’m never leaving you. Remember?” He asks gently, opening the back door and letting the cool air hit them.

She sniffles and straightens her back as she nods and untangles herself from him.

“Hey, y/n/n,” he says, pulling her to him by her hands.

She peers into his adoring eyes with her tearful ones.

He smiles softly before tenderly stroking her cheek, “I promise there’s only one way I’m ever parting from you and I don’t intend on that happening to either of us for a long time until it’s natural from old age”.

She giggles softly as he repeated the long version of the promise he began to make to her months ago.

———

While he changed a few words since then, she knows the sincerity is there.

He memorized it from the start, having only changed a few words to avoid directly mentioning death for the time being.

———

She nods, her palm cupping his cheek.

She gasps as she feels how cold it is and she shakes her head, pulling the hood of his jacket up to shield his face from the NY air.

He blushes but it does little to warm his cheeks and she noticed.

She smirks and rolls her eyes playfully as she cups both cheeks between her hands this time and lets some energy flow.

She doesn’t let the energy go into him, just in her hands under her skin as to not be too warm.

The heat radiating off her palms warms his face quickly and he gives her a knowing smile.

She lowers her hands and leans her head on his shoulder as he protectively holds her waist while they walk.

“So, MIT still the plan yes?” Peter asks as they make it to the school rooftop.

“As long as you’re coming too Pete” she smiles, sitting down with her legs stretched before her.

Peter chuckles, sitting behind her with her in between his legs, arms wrapped around her upper body, “I promise, I’ll follow you wherever it is you want to go. I promised you, you’re stuck with me for eternity babe”.

She laughs and leans back to stare up at him, a wide smile on her face, one he hasn’t seen in a long time.

He smiles back and kisses her nose, making her laugh more before she looks back to the city.

“Then MIT it is handsome” she whispers closing her eyes.

Peter smiles down at her, more than pleased to see her so relaxed.

———

The scene of that night played over and over in Peter’s head as he splashed his face with cold water.

He never intended on breaking his promise.

But he did.

At least it was for a good reason, right?

That has to mean something, doesn’t it?

Besides, at least she didn’t know he broke it.

After all, Doctor Strange’s spell made her not even know he ever existed.

He’d simply wanted to help her get into MIT as they planned, as she deserved.

But it all quickly went sideways and the next best outcome became everyone, including y/n, forgetting Peter ever existed.

He hated the idea of her not knowing him, and him not being able to be with her.

But, he hated the idea of having to explain to her their past and that he had left her, more.

Plus, it has been nearly a year since that night by now.

Confessing now would only make her hurt even more, right?

It would mean she had to recall and therefore relive the moments of him leaving her.

During the battle with Thanos, after the spell, and technically another time after the spell when he decided not to fulfill his promise to make her remember.

He sighs and pushes away from the sink.

At least she could try to be happy now right?

Peter tried to convince himself, as he had this whole year, that his presence would only cause her harm and that every time she looked at him all she saw was her bad memories.

But he knew that it was a lie he made up.

He could see the way she looked at him, with so much love and compassion even when she was hurting.

The way she would run to him for protection or support.

The way she … the way she kept having him promise to not leave her.

Peter bit back his tears and sighed as he wondered how he was to ever move past this.

He’d tried nearly everything, even considered asking Doctor Strange to make him forget his past but he knew that was unlikely.

Plus as much as he was hurting he didn’t want to forget her.

He wanted to forget the pain he caused and the broken promises he made, but not her.

Never her.

It was a constant war in his mind as he struggled to cope.

He glanced at the notebook page he ripped out of his spiral notebook the other night when he couldn’t sleep.

He’d jotted down ideas on ways to get through this, most of which he learned online.

He crossed off nearly all of them.

All but one; make amends.

The only way he could do this was by facing her.

Facing the truth of his actions and seeing the hurt in her eyes.

The hurt he recognized all to well but never thought he’d be the cause of.

But was it really fair to drag her into this just to make himself feel better?

And even if so, what would happen after that?

Would he push her away again, only increasing the number of times she’d been left behind, the number of times he’d left her behind, the number of promised he’d broken to her.

He clenched his jaw and crumpled up the paper, tossing it to the corner of the room where his waste basket was.

He couldn’t do that to her.

Besides after promising he’d be there to help her through all of life’s problems and breaking it, he deserved to deal with this pain alone.

———

Peter begrudgingly grabbed the pizza box from the counter, about to step outside to make another delivery when his body turned to stone.

There she was.

Y/n.

Standing outside, looking at the surrounding area hesitantly before focusing on the building number above the door to his work.

His breathing stopped as he took in how beautiful she always is, even as she stood there scowling at the building for some reason.

Peter frantically turned around only to see his boss glaring at him from behind the counter, the pizzas in his arms already late for their delivery window.

He turned back just as frantically only to not see her anymore.

Maybe it was all in his head, his brain’s latest way of torturing him for his choices.

He let out a sigh and resumed his exit.

“You” he heard as soon as he stepped out of the door.

He closed his eyes and begged his mind to be playing some elaborate game because unless his brain was tricking him into hearing things, the voice he heard could only belong to one person.

Peter turned, his breath catching in his chest as he made eye contact with her.

“Are you Peter Parker?” She asked, calmly despite her arms crossed over her chest.

Did she know?

Did she remember him?

If she did, how was she so calm?

He wanted so badly to embrace her, to feel her hair against his face as he breathed in the fresh scent of her perfume and conditioner.

But the realization that she would then remember the pain he caused her kept him from doing so.

He swallowed painfully and nodded once.

Her calm demeanor changed in an instant and for the first time in his life, he was scared of what she’d do to him.

He always knew how capable she was, hell he’d been the one to remind her of this.

But he’d always known it wouldn’t be directed his way.

Until now.

The look in her eyes was something he’d never seen before.

They were so dark, they were almost… black.

Yet he could see the fury and pain inside them and in the way she stood.

———

He always teased her that when she was fighting to hide her emotions, her left foot would turn in ever so slightly.

He found it endearing and appreciated that it would always alert him to her true feelings.

———

However, in this moment, the force behind it, and it being directed towards him made him want to die.

He caused this anger, this pain inside her.

“Listen, y/n, I-“ he began, his voice rough as his throat was suddenly dry.

“Oh” she laughed, but it wasn’t her normal laugh, the one he fell in love with.

It was instead this cynical, dark laugh.

“So you do know who I am” she smirked, “good. That’ll save us some time”.

Peter’s eyes widened in both shock and confusion.

Time for what?

“Wait, jus-just wait” he rushed, setting the pizzas down on the bench beside them.

She rolled her eyes, “why?”.

“Because I’m confused. I know I don’t have the right to be the one asking the questions here after what I did” he rambles.

“No shit” she scoffs.

“But, please. Just explain to me what’s going on” he sighs.

She groans, “fine. I suppose it’s not a true battle if you don’t know why you’re fighting”.

“Wait what?” Peter froze, but instead of responding, y/n waved her hands and a scene unfolded in his mind.

Their surroundings remained the same but she’d begun to display the visual component of the explanation to him within his mind.

———

Peter watched with stunned tears in his eyes as he began to understand the intensity behind her anger.

Before him he watched as she showed him an image of what appeared to be himself, standing before her with Thanos’s gauntlet over his Stark tech suit.

The depiction of him snapping and Wanda and others turning to dust was so surreal, but he knew it hadn’t happened that way.

Yet, it was just as vivid and flowing as the memories she used to show him; memories from her life before him.

No wonder she was so mad, she believed these depictions.

Peter wasn’t sure what caused them to form, if it was a result to the trauma she’d endured, somehow a glitch with the spell from Doctor Strange, or something else entirely.

But here they were, as if actual memories formed from real events.

He tried to catch his breath but another scene began.

There he was, this time the others had returned and it seemed to be taking place during the last match with Thanos; the one they won.

However, instead of showing Tony sacrificing himself, it showed something much more troubling.

There was Peter, in his suit -his face hidden- likely a result of the spell as he didn’t recall having his mask on that day, standing over Tony.

He gasped as he watched y/N’s memory version of Peter reach out and kill Tony.

Again, he knew it wasn’t real.

But it felt so real, so clear, so upsetting.

———

Finally she dropped her hands and the scenes before him stopped as well.

“He was the only person I had left and you took him from me” she said, her voice firm.

Peter gulped and took a slow step back.

Clearly she did recall some aspects of reality.

Tony had in fact been the only person she had left after the blip.

But, the rest was wrong.

The cause behind it all was wrong.

He could understand if she blamed him for Tony sacrificing himself to bring him and the others back.

But thinking he was the one who caused it all, the one who killed Tony, made Wanda leave…?

That was incompressible.

He’d never do any of that, especially knowing what it would do to her.

She had to hear that.

“Y/n, I- I wouldn’t do that. You know… well you knew me… I wouldn’t hurt you like that” he stuttered, trying to find the right words.

After all, this was his fault; just not in the way she thought.

She laughed darkly again causing his fear to increase and his body to tingle.

“Y/n/n please!” He begged, eyes widening when he saw a flicker of hesitation in her gaze.

Was she still in there?

Was his y/n, the one who knew him, still here, buried under these false memories?

“Enough” she shouted, raising her hands.

Peter sighed but knew better than to try and stand there and fight.

If he wanted her back, he’d have to survive her attack first.

He ran down the street, down the alley, up a wall, and around a corner before taking the time to grab his handmade suit from his backpack.

As he zipped it up, he was nearly hit by another cosmic orb thrown at him.

“Y/n, I know you’re in there” he said, not caring if he sounded crazy.

He wasn’t going down without a fight, without giving them a fighting chance.

This time he’d keep his promise, he’d be there for her no matter the cost.

She ignored him as she levitated closer to him, the rain of bright red orbs of energy leaving her hands not seizing.

He threw himself back and forth as he avoided most of the shots, a few causing him to lose his breath.

“Y/n I don’t know what happened to make it like this-“ he admitted, trying to web her hand.

“Yeah well, sometimes, everything shifts in the snap of a finger” she smirked, snapping her own finger.

Suddenly the ground under Peter gave out and he fell through the building.

Fortunately it had been under construction so no one was inside.

He groaned in pain as he stood up to brace himself for the next attack.

“If this feels personal, that's because it is." Her voice echoed around him.

He looked around, unable to see where she was.

By the time he saw her eyes in the puddle of water leaking from a broken pipe, it was too late.

She used an energy surge to send Peter flying across the debris and into the opposite wall.

Peter rubbed his head as he stared at her in surprise, “since when can you come out of water?!”

She smirked and rolled her eyes, “my sister might’ve taught me some new tricks. You'd be wise to never underestimate me again."

Peter frowned, his eyes scrunching as he glared at her, “I never underestimated you”.

She scoffs, “really? Then why’d you break up with me? You said it was because I wasn’t strong enough, that I would always get in the way and always had to do the right thing”.

Peter’s jaw dropped as he tried to piece together where the hell she got that from.

“Well, how’s this for doing the right thing?” She asked, her eyes closing briefly as she lifted him into the air with her powers alone.

Peter glanced at the floor before looking back at her, “y/n. I would never say that. There’s nothing wrong with doing the right thing! And you’ve always been strong, more so than any of us. These memories are all wrong!”

“I will not allow myself to be gaslighted by you Peter” she snarled, letting go of her hold on him and letting him drop.

Peter quickly shot a web out and swung to the nearest support beam.

“Hmmm” she sighed, sounding bored, “what do you think Tony was thinking about? You know, when he died?”

Peter wasn’t sure how to respond to that.

Especially not when she had a corrupted recollection of his death.

“Since you seem to be too simple minded to respond, I’ll answer” she said, her voice sounding much like someone Peter couldn’t quite identify.

“You. He was thinking about you Peter. Always you, no matter who else was in his life” she said.

Peter couldn’t refute the claim, had she read Tony’s mind that night?

He didn’t know, but he did know she wasn’t recalling most details correctly.

If she was, she wouldn’t have been mad enough to get revenge on him over Tony’s last thoughts being of Peter if that were even truly what they were.

She might’ve been hurt or mad for awhile at the implications of it all, but she’d never do this.

It was then that he realized who her voice sounded like.

It sounded like y/N’s sister, Wanda.

Not the voice itself but the tone, pronunciation, emphasis, and verbiage choices.

They weren’t y/n’s, they were Wanda’s.

Peter glared into the distance as if doing so would let Wanda know he was going to deal with her soon.

That he would not let this go and he would address what she did to y/n.

Just as soon as he got his girl back, out of the rubble Wanda seemed to have formed in her mind, and back to reality, back to him.

“Y/n, please hear me out” he softly requested.

“Why should I?” She asked, her hands raising again, “you killed him!”

“I didn’t. I don’t know exactly what happened to make those memories. But I know the you that knows I wouldn’t do any of that is still inside of you” he sighed.

Was he though?

How was he to know that the version of her that remembered him and his actions would ever be reachable?

Not only had he allowed Doctor Strange to alter her memories, but seemingly Wanda had followed suit.

Was there anything real left?

It was hard to say and he wasn’t very hopeful until he recalled the hesitation he saw in her earlier.

It was as if she was reanalyzing him, their situation, and possibly reality as a whole.

He’d taken it as a small sign that maybe she remembered him.

But maybe it was more than that.

He had to try at least.

When she didn’t respond, he felt another crushing wave of hope hit him.

Sure she hadn’t agreed and come to her senses, but she hadn’t thrown another strike and hadn’t argued.

He could sense the fragment of her that he so desperately needed to find and secure.

“I know you’re doubting me and I get it. But it’s me, Peter and I do love you. I’ve never stopped loving you, and I know-“ he began but she cut him off as she shot a bolt of energy towards him, cutting the web he was holding onto.

“The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person” she sighed, watching as he dropped closer to the ground.

Peter’s web barely gripped the corner in time to have him slam into the post rather than drop to what would likely be his demise.

“You’re wrong” he mumbled, pulling himself up to the ledge despite the atrocious aching in his body.

“Tony loved you, M-May loved you, I love you” he said, “so it can’t be true. If it were they wouldn’t have loved you back. I wouldn’t still be in love with you”.

Peter aggressively wiped away his tears and sweat as he stared down at her and waited for her response.

“Oh but that’s where you’re wrong Mr. Parker” she smirked and raised herself to his level.

Peter’s heart clenching as she referred to him by Wanda’s nickname for him, one y/n had never called him before.

“See, it doesn’t matter if you love me. Because it … it didn't … it didn’t mean anything to me.” She said, and while Peter wanted to collapse in on himself at her statement, he let himself hope one last time.

He saw the resistance she had to say those words, not just in her tone but in her eyes, and in the way even when levitating her foot turned inwards.

She had no reason to be mad or emotional about that statement unless she remembered.

Unless there was a part of her angry for saying it.

Even if it was just her being mad she felt that way, it was something.

It showed him that she had some, tiny as it may be, recollection of their past, of him meaning something to her.

“I don’t believe you” he said, stepping closer to the ledge to be near her.

He watched as yet again something flickered in her eyes, beneath the blackness.

“Are you that insane? I saw the fear in you earlier, the fear still there now. You’re scared of me, which you should be” she laughed darkly.

“And you’re clearly in pain because of me. And I’m not even done yet. Yet, you still think I ever had feelings for you?” She rolled her eyes.

Peter clenched his jaw and nodded, “yes I’m scared and in pain. Because the scariest and the most painful thing is to be hated by someone you truly love."

She stared at him for a moment in silence as he breathed loudly due to the pain in his rib cage.

Peter watched as she closed her eyes and her body tensed.

He quickly shot out a web to stabilize her as her body began to sway, her levitation wavering as she kept her eyes closed.

She seemed to be focused on something internal.

Whether that was the fake memories, the few remaining real ones, combing through the two, or something else, he had no way of knowing.

So he just watched and waited for her to come around.

As her eyes reopened, she shook her head, one hand tugging on her hair; a habit he picked up on her doing when confused as she hated being lost and unsure.

“I’m here. I know I … “ he swallowed, accepting his guilt, “I know I broke my promises to you. But if you come back to me, I won’t ever leave you alone again”.

She stared at him silently and he nearly gasped when he saw her eyes were not quite as dark as they were moments earlier.

“Come back to me, please. I’m here. Tell me what happened, what she did to you, I’ll find a way to fix it” he offered, reaching his hand towards her.

He knew very well if the wrong side of her won, she’d easily be able to grab his hand and throw him to the ground.

But he didn’t care, he needed to make this right.

This was how he was going to make amends to her, by being there for her when no one else was; when he should run and hide, he’d stay.

Y/N’s hand shook so hard Peter thought it would snap off, but eventually she had her palm in his.

His heart dropped as he looked at her hand, seeing the tips of her fingers were now black.

“Y/n?! What is this?” He asked, holding her hand tightly.

“D-dark-“ she mumbled causing him to look up and see she was still fighting something inside her head.

No, not something, someone.

There was only one person he knew capable of entering her head that way.

If Peter had her capabilities, he’d have bursted into the sky that moment and hunted Wanda down.

But he didn’t and he didn’t know how, or even if he could help.

Whatever hold Wanda had over her sister was clearly still wrecking havoc on y/n even more so as she fought back.

He watched as her body slowly slumped more and more.

Peter quickly used his free hand to form an ugly but sturdy connection between the ledge he was on and the web he’d shot under to to steady her earlier.

He had barely crossed the gap between them when she dropped into his arms.

Peter hadn’t even realized he started to cry, it was as if his heart knew what was coming before his brain figured it out.

“Y/n, please, you can do this. I told you, I’ve never underestimated you. I know you can do this” he encouraged, sinking to his knees as he held her.

It had all happened so fast; for him anyways.

He knew the war inside her own mind must’ve felt centuries long.

———

He’d seen the sisters in a big fight before and knew they had the ability to communicate to within the other’s brain rather than out loud.

It had only happened once as y/n begged Wanda to never do it again, her fear of not being in control of herself being crippling.

Back then it hadn’t been done with true malice, the way Peter figured it was now.

Instead it was a fight between siblings that got out of hand.

And Wanda kept her word and never forced her way into y/N’s mind again, at least not that he was aware of.

Until whatever this was, that is.

———

He��s not sure when or how it happened, but she’d gotten back in and manipulated y/N’s mind.

That much he knew for certain.

Why or how she’d grown this strong was beyond him.

She’d been able to show people their fears before, as had y/n.

But he’d never seen either sister twist someone’s memories or corrupt their emotions.

“I’m going to get you back where it’s safe and we’ll figure out a way to get her out” he said, noticing her staring at him.

“You can’t” she sighed.

“Yes, I can. And I will, I just need to-“ he began but she weakly squeezed his hand.

“She has the Darkhold” she whispered.

“The dark- what?” Peter asked, brushing hair away from her eyes.

“Darkhold.” She squeezed her eyes together as she shook her head, groaning softly.

“Y/n” Peter whimpered, staring at her hopelessly as he waited for her to once again deal with the war seemingly happening inside her mind.

When she opened her eyes, they were glazed and she looked ready to sleep at any moment.

Peter wasn’t sure what this Darkhold thing was, but he was going to learn.

He had to know what was causing the one he loved to appear weaker than she ever had been and yet when taken over by Wanda even more powerful than before.

Peter had seen y/n fight plenty of villains and even her sister in both mental and physical sparring rounds at Mr. Stark’s headquarters but she never looked this diminished.

Either the Darkhold made Wanda stronger, y/n weaker, or both.

Regardless it was now his mission to learn everything about it and make this better, to make her feel better.

Y/n sighed, “I can’t beat her. Not now, not with the Darkhold over her. I tried. I tried to stop her from hurting America Chavez and this is what happened”.

To say he was confused would be a huge understatement but Peter nodded, kissing her forehead tenderly, “you’re stronger than you let yourself believe y/n”.

She let out a gust of air and shook her head, “it’s not my self doubt this time. That’s the point of the Darkhold, no one can beat her right now “.

Peter frowned, his heart breaking at the defeated look on her face.

“So we wait” he said, “we wait until we can”.

She laughed softly, not the dark one he didn’t recognize, but not the one knew to be genuine.

No, this was a pity laugh, he realized.

“She won’t let me Peter. It’s literally killing me to resist this much, I can’t “ she said ashamed.

“So stop resisting!” He begged, propping her frame up.

She shook her head slowly, “if I do we’ll go back to being enemies. I’ll disappear into the darkness again. She’ll win the war. And you’ll be in danger. I’ll put you in danger”.

Peter fought back tears as he tried to reason with her “then let’s be enemies. Just for a bit as I figure this out. Then I’ll come back, I’ll find you again and pull you back out”.

She let her eyes get heavy again, “Peter promise me”.

He flinched as he recalled how he’d broken his last promise to her and yet she still wanted one from him.

“I promise, I won’t stop fighting to bring you-“ he said, pausing when he saw her tense.

She mumbled something he didn’t quite understand, something about him but she’d used his name making him realize she was trying to speak to Wanda but as her powers diminished she was struggling to do so without verbalizing it as well.

“Wanda. Please! You don’t get it” she responded, and the pain in her voice infuriated Peter.

He closed his eyes tightly as he held her to him.

“Is that all it was? Why you did this. Were you hoping to raise me into being your super weapon?” She asked, trying to form a sarcastic tone but failing.

Peter’s eyes broke open as he stared in shock down at her, watching as a few tears fell from her eyes at whatever Wanda’s response was.

Peter wanted nothing more than to get y/n back to his apartment, let her rest and find Wanda and fix this whole mess.

But as he stared down at her, his brain finally caught up with the sinking feeling his heart felt minutes before.

She wasn’t going to make it.

He didn’t want to admit it, but as his eyes looked over her, he knew it was true.

There weren’t even any wounds he could apply pressure to to help her.

They were all mental, all done by the dark war inside of her mind.

Looking back at Peter, she sighed “no. I need you to promise me th-tha”.

He nodded rapidly, “I promise, love. That’s what I was saying, I promise. You have to let go, let her win this fight. We’ll win the war”.

She pouted, “stop. That’s not it. Promise me you won’t touch the darkhold”.

“What?” He asked, shaking his head in disbelief that that was her main concern right now.

“Peter!” She groaned, shutting him up.

“Fine, fine, fine. I promise, I won’t mess with whatever that is” he agreed, “now please stop fighting her”.

“Promise you won’t intentionally let her touch you with the darkhold magic” she added, reaching for his face.

He watched his tears bead off his cheeks and down onto her’s, mixing together with her own tears, “I promise. Now, y/n please end your resistance and we’ll figure this out”.

She gave him a smile, one that no matter the circumstances, made his stomach flip every time.

“I’m sorry Peter. I won’t let her overpower me again, I won’t. This dark war between us is over. I’m sorry you were dragged into it” she says, the last part almost missed behind Peter’s broken sobs.

Peter’s upper body collapsed over her’s the moment her eyes closed and her chest stopped raising.

———

Peter felt something cold against his cheek, pulling back, he saw the necklace he got her years ago around her neck.

It felt odd seeing it there, knowing she was wearing it while not remembering him when controlled by Wanda.

Especially when the locket had a picture of them together on it and a small scrap of paper he wrote her a note on folded up and tucked into the frame for the other side.

He shakingly opened the locket, needing to see the picture one last time.

Peter’s grip on the necklace doubled as he felt his muscles turn to steel.

The picture had been removed, replaced by one of Wanda and Y/n.

He knew he’d regret it, but he had to read the note and see if it was his small love letter to her or something else Wanda corrupted.

His eyes hardened as he read the fake note she used to replace his.

In his he’d talked about how much he loved y/n, well as much as he could fit onto the small paper.

In this one, Wanda wrote ‘War takes no pity on family’.

He numbly stood up, fists clenched at his side.

“You want a war Wanda?” He asked to the room that was empty apart from himself and y/n’s body.

“So be it” Peter murmured, “I’ll give you war”.

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jahayla-parker · 1 year

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Crushing Plans: Peter Parker x Reader

Part Five

Description: 4.2k wc, Crushing Plans part 5, y/n has a crush on her bestfriend Peter but he’s interested in their friend MJ. Meanwhile Peter and Y/n have to decide if they want the responsibility that comes with their powers (while also trying to keep these powers a secret). To make matters worse, y/n’s powers are impacted by her emotions; including jealousy. How will their class trip to Europe go with all of this going on?

Warnings (for series as a whole): Mention of injuries, villains, far from home spoilers?, evil, witches, magic, powers/abilities, jealousy, hurt-comfort, I think that’s it!

Click Here For Previous Parts and Series Masterlist (5 parts plus the story continues in Bewitched Love (No Way Home wip w/ the same characters as a story continuation)

When they arrived, Mysterio’s display was already in effect; Happy was very surprised it wasn’t real.

Peter glanced y/n’s way once more, nodding at her before slipping his mask on as he exited the plane.

Y/n could hear Peter’s voice through the earpiece in Happy’s ear, but not enough to know what he said.

She watched as he swung closer to the projection.

Happy seemed to be promising Peter he was doing -or perhaps would be doing- whatever it was Peter had said.

Y/n beamed as she watched Peter already making headway in his fight.

~~~

“You’ve come to your senses” Agatha grinned wickedly.

Y/n focused her thoughts on Peter liking MJ, allowing Agatha to only see her emotional pain and assume it was the reason she was now complying.

“I’m still worried” y/n stated, suppressing a grin at how convincing her tone was.

“Of course you are sweet child, how can I help?” Agatha said, unrealistically sweetly.

Yn glanced around the park to get her bearings but let Agatha believe it was over fear of others learning her secret.

The fact she was donning a mask worked in her favor to convince Agatha.

Her mask should be appearing to Agatha as a bland, white, scrappily made disguise; thanks to an easy image modification spell Y/n had cast on it.

But, in reality, it was a radiant azure blue; Peter managed to adjust the hue on the Stark product generator enough to match her cosmic glow coloring exactly.

Her clothes should be seen by Agatha as the same set y/n wore when they last saw each other; Yn not wasting energy or time constructing some new fake outfit just for a distraction.

Much like her actual mask, her actual outfit was azure, fit to her in a way that allowed her to move, and had discrete padding on her knees should she collapse again.

Her clothing included a contrasting dark black cloak-like item, one merging the designs of other witches; Agatha and Wanda included.

Except, the bottom inner workings of hers, the side presently resting against the back of her legs, was a shiny silver lining, embossed with swirling stitching.

“If I… if I let you have my powers, how do I know I’ll survive?” Y/n asked, hiding her thoughts as she began calling upon her energy.

“Oh hun, you have my word” Agatha said.

Not wanting to give in uncharacteristically fast, y/n hesitated.

“I did tell you the truth about your origin didn’t I? Why would I admit that but lie now?” Agatha argued with a soft voice.

Y/n knew the reason but kept the thought from her mind.

“Okay…” y/n slowly agreed.

Agatha smiled but Yn saw the evil glint in her dark irises.

As she felt Agatha’s cosmic presence reach hers, y/n whispered “pari mensura” before having her mind wander back to her unrequited crush on Peter.

She bit her lip as she kept her lips from moving and exposing her nearly inaudible spell repetition.

The pain also helped subconsciously remind her that there was a purpose behind the torture of her own mind she was doing by focusing on her doomed situation with Peter.

pari mensura

....

pari mensura

Y/n echoed, encouraging and directing her energy heading towards Agatha to match the force Agatha was using.

Agatha fell for the sensation, believing that she was truly pulling the energy from y/n; rather than y/n sending it to her.

It wasn’t an easy task, keeping her confidence up despite replaying Peter and MJ’s flirtations.

Let alone simultaneously hiding these underlying thoughts, her mind having to both actively think and not think at the same time.

She still couldn’t explain it, but she could feel the thoughts almost filed into different places in her brain.

She’d never compartmentalized her thoughts this way before, much less in so many different subjects at the same time for such a long period of time.

She had to pretend she was thinking about MJ and Peter but not truly think about it.

She had to hide her thoughts about her actions and newly found confidence.

She had to pretend she was thinking about how it felt to have her powers pulled from her while being sure to not truly believe the illusion herself.

It was a lot, and her underlying concerns over how things were going on Peter’s end didn’t help.

She wanted to quickly look over to see how it was coming, but she knew she couldn’t risk the brief lapse in concentration.

Especially as she already felt the ache in her head returning at her attempts.

While Agatha wasn’t truly absorbing y/N’s energy, y/n had knowingly gone into the battle on a nearly empty basis.

Technically speaking, witches had an almost infinite supply of cosmic energy at their disposal.

However, it took much more energy to produce it without thinking about it.

And even more to actively focus on something else while using it.

It didn’t help that it took practice to get to the point of being able to utilize the endless access to energy waves; practice y/n didn’t have.

She felt her eyes droop as Agatha increased her strength, somehow having noticed something was off.

Irritated, y/n wanted to scream, having been nearly ready to strike Agatha prior to this sudden detection from Agatha’s end.

Her illusion was faltering and she would soon lose her chance to strike if she didn’t quickly adjust.

Y/n attempted to once again match her force by sending her own equally balanced force back, “pari mensura”.

She hadn’t realized that she forgot to keep her voice low when reciting the spell until she saw the fury in Agatha’s eyes.

It was too late to put her defenses up by the time she saw it, but fortunately, Peter had detected it.

His spider senses had tingled in an attempt to alert him to an issue around him.

He instantly scanned the area in search of y/n, his webs shooting across the street and toward the park in mere seconds upon seeing y/n’s genuine struggle.

The signs of Agatha’s realization of the illusion soon followed his release of web fluid.

Peter squinted as he waited for the seemingly long time it took for his webs to reach Agatha.

To anyone else, it was merely a matter of 2 seconds; feeling longer to Peter due to the scene being slowed down by his ‘spidey senses’,

As the webs wrapped around Agatha’s wrist, y/N’s panicked eyes turned his way.

Peter tugged on the web attached to his subject, trying to knock Agatha off kilter enough for y/n to compose herself.

Y/n forced her legs to hold her tired body steady as she pushed back against Agatha, starting to increase her force.

She wasn’t sure how much more she could do though.

Agatha’s detection was earlier than y/n had anticipated, or perhaps y/n hesitated too long to strike.

Either way, it wasn’t going to plan and her confidence was weaning as a result.

Peter having to step in and help her despite his own battle going on fueled her embarrassment and disappointment in herself.

She knew she had to change her thought patterns if she wanted to have a chance at overpowering Agatha; she had to regain her confidence somehow.

Once her legs felt semi-steady beneath her, y/n glanced over at Peter in hopes of an encouraging smile or nod to drive her confidence back up.

However, her eyes were instead met with a burst of energy shooting across the scene and throwing Peter backward into the brick siding of the bridge.

Y/n felt a sudden force deep in her bones, it had a slightly familiar feeling to it but was otherwise an unknown sensation.

The sheer volume of cosmic current flowing through her body lifted y/n into the air.

Y/N’s spell that’d previously been masking her new ‘hero’ suit dissolved before Agatha’s eyes.

Without any hesitation, y/n let the new, stronger, faster, thicker, flow of energy do as it wished.

The only thing her mind focused on was having witnessed Agatha hurt Peter.

Y/N’s eyes fell closed as the current tore through her and shot across the park to Agatha.

Agatha howled loudly as her skin flashed blue, y/N’s energy hiting deep.

Yn pried her eyes open enough to check on Peter, giving him a grateful nod before turning back to Agatha.

She could tell if she kept going at full force, it would be the end of Agatha.

And as much as she wanted to tear her apart for harming Peter, it wasn’t in her to kill someone.

Y/n was pleasantly surprised when her energy ebbed at her unspoken limitation.

She might not plan on ending Agatha’s life, but she was going to make sure Agatha was no longer a threat.

Y/n didn’t want, nor did she think she needed, Agatha’s energy.

Even if she relished the feeling of such a strong force inside herself, she didn’t want any possibly tainted cosmic energy in her.

So, she began contemplating spells that would keep her enemy alive but deplete her power.

“Vivit et impotens” y/n stated, frowning when nothing happened.

She took a deep breath, reminding herself she could do this.

Staring at Agatha, hands stretched out to her, “vivit et impotens”.

Once again, nothing.

She racked her brain for more traditional ways to say her goal.

Chest held high, she loudly declared, “reducendus au homini”.

Y/N’s fingers stiffened as a dark aura flowed between Agatha and y/N’s hand.

She gritted her jaw as she focused on directing her own energy to shield herself from any damage and form an orb in her outstretched palm.

Within three minutes, y/n stood on the ground, holding a black and purple ball of cosmic forces in her palm.

Agatha lay on the grass, visibly defeated and weeping in sorrow over her loss; but, she was alive.

Pleased in completing her task so quickly, she gazed at the ball as she contemplated how to destroy it.

Y/n felt a sweltering heat radiating from the orb and saw the very tips of her fingernails starting to darken from the insidious and dark power Agatha’d absorbed in her attempt at managing the darkhold.

Without needing to search for the words, her mind began chanting a spell she wasn’t familiar with.

In its attempt to guard y/n and her untainted energy, her mind screamed “eliminate ab existentia”.

After five repetitions of the phrase, y/n saw her fingertips return to normal as a burst of blue energy erupted, blinding her momentarily.

Y/n rubbed her eyes and smiled proudly to herself.

However, her focus quickly shifted to finding Peter.

As she whipped her head around, her eyes landed on Peter.

He let out a visible sigh of relief and slightly slowed his approach to ease the pain in his leg.

Despite his attempts to mask his pain, y/n noticed his limp and rushed over.

Peter smiled as he hugged her, pulling her to his chest as soon as she was close enough.

“You’re hurt” she whispered, stepping back after a few moments.

“I’m okay, it’s over” he huffed, eyes checking her face for any cuts.

“Can I… May I…?” Y/n mumbled hesitatingly.

“Y/n, you don’t have to be nervous around me” Peter grinned, “what are you trying to ask?”

Y/n bit her lip, looking up at him sweetly, making his legs feel weak.

“I’d like to try a spell to help your leg” she stated.

“Is this okay?” She asked, stepping back more.

Peter nodded without hesitation, completely trusting her.

She smiled, squatting and delicately placing her right hand on his kneecap.

Her left hand shyly rested against his hip, intimidated by the intimate location.

Closing her eyes, she focused on keeping her energy warm enough to relax his muscles but not too hot to hurt him.

“Okay… lenire et confirma crus” y/n whispered, letting her energy flow from her hands into his upper leg.

Peter let out an audible release of air and Y/n felt the tension leave his leg muscles.

Yn removed her hands from his body and stood back up, smiling softly, “any better?”

Peter grinned widely and nodded, his cheeks red, “very. Thank you”.

She nodded timidly, her smile widening.

“And you? You’re not hurt?” Peter pondered, his slightly bloodstained hands cupping her face as he analyzed her skin closely.

Y/n swallowed thickly, trying to ignore the warmth of his breath hitting her face and the close proximity of his lips to hers.

“Y/n?” Peter asked, stroking her cheek just below her eyemask when he found a faint blemish.

“I’m good,” she nodded, gazing into his painfully pretty, umber eyes.

Peter blushed as he noticed how close he was upon feeling himself relax after her assure she was unharmed.

“Thank you for your help back there” y/n said, waving to the park she left minutes before.

“It wasn’t a big deal” he smiled

“Yes it was, you got hurt, because of me” she shook her head as guilt flooded her voice.

“Y/n, I swear, I didn’t mind helping” he promised, voice thick with sincerity, “I wanted to make sure you were safe”.

“Because if you I was. You helped me more than you’ll know” she hummed.

Peter watched inquisitively as y/n’s eyes began to scan his mask, left to right and top to bottom.

“The blood… your hands. You said-“ she whispered, her voice tense.

“It’s not mine” he rushed out in assurance before repeating the words remorsefully as he felt their weight.

Y/n gave him an apologetic glance, “okay. We can talk about that if you want, when you’re ready”.

Peter nodded, “thank you. I could use that”.

She gave him a timid smile, but Peter noticed she kept scanning his face.

Peter looked around before pulling his mask up and off of his head, “I’m okay y/n”.

He felt his breath hitch as she furrowed her eyebrows, the tip of her middle finger slowly sending a calming warmth to seep in through his skin as her fingertip traced a minor scratch he had obtained in his fight.

Much to Peter’s disappointment, she soon leaned back, hand lowering to her side after the scratch disappeared.

Peter lifted his hand up to feel his skin where she’d touched it, a dorky smile on his face.

“Y/n,” Peter began, his need to confess his feelings shaking violently in his chest.

Y/n sensed something hanging in the air and sucked in a deep breath.

She noticed the gentle glow of his eyes and how he seemed to be radiating nervous but excited energy.

“Peter?” She asked, trying not to get her hopes up as to what he was going to say.

There was something in his gaze that made her melt, desperately hoping she was correct in seeing the love behind it.

Peter’s cheeks were nearly as red as his suit as he gave her a lopsided smile, mentally cursing himself for not pulling it together.

His hesitation made her look around, her heart plummeting to her stomach as she locked eyes with MJ several feet behind her.

MJ hadn’t noticed them, but it was clear Peter noticed her; his lovey-dovey trance now making sense to y/n.

“Oh, “ y/n breathed, taking her time as she turned back around to face Peter, “right. Umm, you can go”.

Peter’s lips parted as he stared at her with a blank expression.

Y/n rolled the rushing energy in her, picturing the blue life source loop over itself and flow in the other direction; moving along the lines of an imaginary infinity sign.

It was a technique she’d learned years ago to stay calm.

She hadn’t been in such a soul crushing situation where she needed it in a long time.

But her -albeit brief- moment of hope over her seemingly unrequited feelings actually being requited after all drove a stake into her soul as reality emerged.

Peter rubbed his neck, his eyes never leaving her face as he tried to understand why she suddenly appeared shut down, “y-y/n..”

She shook her head, wanting out of the situation rather than letting it drag on longer.

“Look, Peter… it’s okay, really” y/n said, causing Peter even more confusion.

Before he could even think of a response, she continued, “just..”.

Y/n let the calming resonance of the energy flowing in her remind her of her accomplishments today.

She may still have been in a hopelessly doomed position with her crush, but at least she could rely on him; and herself.

Allowing her confidence to drive her towards one final courageous act, y/n closed the distance between them.

Y/n way too quickly pressed her lips against his cheek and pulled away, “thank you again for helping”.

Peter’s teeth shined as he grinned like an idiot, his face felt so hot he swore he was going to catch on fire soon.

However, as y/n walked away from him, his lips instantly fell into a pout.

Without thinking, he reached for her hand, halting her departure, “where are you going? Why are you leaving?”

She couldn’t turn back to look at him, instead squeezing his hand kindly, “she’s waiting for you, go on”.

Peter tightened his grip and tugged on her hand, pleading her to turn around and explain, “who?”

Y/n squeezed her eyes shut, wanting to tear his hand off and run until she couldn’t feel his presence near her.

Not that her currently exhausted body would even let her if she asked.

“Y/n” Peter whined, lost and upset over her sudden change in demeanor, “talk to me”.

“MJ” y/n whispered, making a resounding rush of guilt surface in Peter.

He’d forgotten y/n had known a tiny bit about his plans to act on his feelings for MJ.

Her voice sounded sad and distant to him.

Had he not noticed she was seemingly harboring feelings for him too?

How long had they been there?

His mind played back the last week, his guilt only growing as he found all the signs he’d missed.

“Pe-“ y/n began, finally facing him.

“No, please, “ Peter hushed her, his sorrowful eyes trying to lock with her irises but her downwards crooked neck prevented it.

Y/n remained silent but removed her hand from his, fingers trailing slowly across his palm, driving him insane.

“I need to tell you something…” Peter whispered.

She nodded, gaze still focused on her boots.

He swallowed, “I uhh… I clearly should’ve told you this before… or umm… well yeah…”.

Laughing softly at his own nervousness, “I like you. Like, really like you…. Not just as a friend.. I like-“.

Y/n gritted her teeth, “don’t. Peter. Please don’t”.

“W-what?” He inquired.

“I can’t do it Peter. I don’t want to hear it” her voice was stiff but he could hear the way her pitch wavered between words, “I’ve wanted to hear you say it, but not like this”.

Peter sighed, taking in the scene around them.

He knew it was far from romantic and certainly less than she deserved, but he hadn’t wanted to keep it in any longer.

If he’d learned anything this trip it was that life was unpredictable, terrifying, and short.

He didn’t want to waste any more of his hiding from his feelings.

The feelings he felt for her were far more intense than any he’d ever had towards MJ and he needed her to know how he felt about her; romantic scenery or not.

“You’re right, I should’ve -“ Peter apologized, bashfully rubbing the spandex covering his arms.

“I don’t want you to say it like this. Don’t tell me you like me when I know you like MJ, I can’t handle that” she whimpered, “certainly not right now”.

“Y/n, I don’t want MJ” he swore, his fingers twitching to touch her and pull her in for an embrace.

Y/N’s newly born confidence spoke up, “I don’t want to be someones backup or second choice. I’d rather just not be chosen”.

Peter felt a tinge of pride in her standing up for herself despite his heartache and guilt over her feeling this way.

“Y/n,” he hummed, “It was always you."

Y/N’s eyes snapped to his, anger flashing through her y/e/c eyes, “don’t pity me Peter. I can take you liking MJ. But I can’t take you toying with me. I know about your crush on MJ, you know I know about it. I told you I knew before we even left New York”.

Peter nodded, his eyes not leaving hers despite the hurt in them making him feel like he was the biggest villain they’d encountered on this trip.

“I did like MJ” he nodded, being sure to not leave much time between the conclusion of that sentence and the start of the next.

“But, I don’t anymore. Even when I did,” Peter shook his head softly, “it wasn’t the same”.

“I… I don’t follow” y/n admitted, eyes no longer displaying hurt or anger but rather confusion.

Confusion Peter could fix!

He had no problem taking however long it took to explain to her why the way he felt about her was different and far better than what he used to feel for MJ.

He would willingly go on and on about it until she understood.

“When I picture myself happy... It's with you” Peter told her, “I’ve not had that with anyone else”.

Y/n unintentionally caused a tiny whistle as she sucked air in through her barely parted lips, “…n-…not MJ?”

Peter held her gaze as he shook his head definitively, “no, never for MJ”.

She nodded slowly, still uncertain.

“I should’ve realized it that day, when you joined our school. I could sense something was different, not just about you…” he mumbled shyly, “but towards you. Sure I knew I found you attractive, but that was given”.

Y/n giggled softly as her lips curled up at the edges.

Peter blushed upon hearing his own confession repeat in his head, yet he continued for her sake, “I was too scared to approach you, and the feelings I had seemed too unusual.. I… couldn’t trust my senses at the time so I dismissed it and told myself I still had a crush on MJ”.

Y/n’s eyes scanned his face for signs of deception as she listened closely.

He sighed at his own behaviors, “to be fair, I still did. Or so I thought. Because, if this” he signaled between their bodies, “is what having a crush on someone truly feels like, I never actually had a crush on her then”.

Y/n felt a tear roll down her cheek as she took in his words.

Peter tenderly wiped her tear from her face, “y/n… I get it if I’ve missed my chance. But…There is something between us and… it is the most magical thing I have ever felt."

Y/n paused, her eyes distant as she visibly contemplated something, “ yeah, well.... you know… maybe I accidentally-“.

Peter chuckled, tilting her head towards him, his fingertips encouraging her to move face closer to his, “No y/n. I don’t mean actual magic”.

“Are you su-“ y/n worried.

“Yes, I know what your magic feels like, and as … strong and comforting as it is, this is different; better” he promised.

“So… now what?” Y/n asked, “what all does this mean?”

“Well, it’s a two part-plan. First, I'm gonna find an excuse to kiss you. The second step is asking you to be mine” Peter admitted, cheeks crimson.

“You don’t need an excuse to kiss me…” she whispered shyly.

Peter chuckled quietly, “no? Cause…You do have something in your hair, umm... Do you want me to get it out?"

Y/n wasn’t sure if there actually was something in her hair or if this was his attempt at finding an excuse like he planned to do, but she couldn’t care less.

She shook her head, her fingers grabbing the collar of his suit and pulling him closer until their lips met.

They smiled against each others lips before parting.

"Your lips are really warm." Peter blurted.

“Oh..sorry?” Y/n asked, her fingers feeling her bottom lip.

“No I liked it” he admitted, the words rushing out awkwardly.

She giggled and nodded, looking at her boots, “good….Me too, Uhh. err- the kiss, I mean”.

Peter grabbed her hand, “Wanna, like- I mean, I know the whole class is all going but ….for the flight home… maybe… We could sit together?“

Y/n nodded rapidly, gazing up at a smiling and blushing Peter.

So, her crush wasn’t doomed after all.

The trip hadn’t gone the way either of them planned.

But it was far better than they could've envisioned.

----Post Credit Scene----

Stay tuned for more of Y/n and Peter as they continue their adventures in Bewitched Love where you can read about the same characters as they handle the events of No Way Home!

Bewitched Love parts can be found on the series masterlist!

SERIES MASTERLIST/NAVIGATION

PETER PARKER MASTERLIST/NAVIGATION

TOM HOLLAND MASTERLIST/NAVIGATION (INCLUDING CHARACTERS)

MY MAIN MASTERLIST/NAVIGATION (ALL MY WORKS)

Peter Parker Taglist (comment here to be added): @galaxyholland @fishingirl12 @raajali3 @justapurrcat @natswife-marvelicious @directioner5life @ell0ra-br3kk3r @theslayerofthevampires

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