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mingishoe · 4 years

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Secret Santa

Summary: Secret santa but yall got each other even though you two don’t like each other

Pairing: Reader x Yunho (ft. Seonghwa and San)

Word count- 11.8K unedited… oops

Smut with too much plot (Subs: reader and Yunho, Doms: Seonghwa, San, and reader to Yunho) *Yunho is a sub and no one can change my mind*

Smut Warning: exhibitionism, oral sex- M receiving, degration, dirty talk, car sex?, use of pet names, soft cute sex, sex that’ll make someone feel sore for days, unprotected sex (don’t be silly, wrap your willy) Marking, cream pie, and more that I can’t remember…

25 days of christmas: Day 6

12-27-19 pretend it didn’t take me 20 days to write this ah ha ha

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Christmas time in your office was probably the best time of the year. Everyone was in the Christmas mood and there were decorations hanging everywhere.

In your office floor, everyone was pretty much friends so you all had secret Santa and drew names out of a bowl.

Your friend Mingi called everyone around the desk that had all the names in it. Mingi lowkey had a secret plan for you to get a certain person.

It was known around the office that you and Yunho just didn’t get along for whatever reason. No one else besides you and Yunho knew why you didn’t like each other.

If you were being honest with yourself, it was silly. You knew it was silly and even Yunho probably knew it was silly.

Basically you and Yunho used to be really close friends a long long time ago in elementary through highschool until you got a boyfriend.

It was in your freshman year in Highschool and you got your first “real” boyfriend. During the time you and Yunho were best friends and sure, he was happy you had a boyfriend and you were happy. It was a good happy time for all three of yall.

After awhile you assume Yunho just got jealous and he brought up the “Your boyfriend is toxic and doesn’t love you” talk and at the time it was a H U G E deal to both of you.

So fast forward Yunho started to ghost you and you ended up breaking up with your boyfriend at the end of your sophmore year around your year and a half mark, and you and Yunho had started to fix your friendship but neither of you were able to stay 5 minutes without arguing.

Fast forward even more you and Yunho practically hated each other for the rest of highschool and once you got into college you had just started to think you got away from him.

But guess what? With your shit luck, once you got your office job the next day- Yunho was in the space next to you.

At that point you honestly thought the world was just against you.

Like sure you weren’t really mad at Yunho anymore, it was just kinda annoying.

That leads to where you’re at now, standing next to your friend Wooyoung as Mingi is making his way around the room letting people draw.

Mingi doesn’t have either your name or Yunhos name in the bag just so you two would get each other. You’re the last person to draw, besides Yunho since he’s in a meeting, and you grab one of the last papers already overcome with a sinking feeling in your stomach.

You have the paper in your hand eyeing Mingi suspiciously.

You slowly unfold the paper and as soon as you see the “Y” your heart drops, “Mingi- you son of a bitch! Wooyoung, wanna trade? please?” Wooyoung and Mingi exchanged a look before Wooyoung simply said no and walked away.

“Mingi, why are you such a pain in the ass,” you rested your head in your hands. “Look, maybe it’s just your shitty luck because I did nothing,” you’re about to say something but you get cut off as you see Yunho wrapped his arm around Mingi’s shoulder.

You looked away awkwardly as Mingi hands him the bag to pick the last name out of the bag. He snaps his head up looking at you and you stare at him with wide eyes, “W-What?” he turns his head to mingi while responding, “none of your business,” you scoff while rolling your eyes as you turn to go back to your work space.

You sat down with a huff, you were pretty sure he got you and that’s why he made such a big deal. It wasn’t that it was hard to get him something, yall are together everyday and even after work since you both have the same friends. It was just the whole secret Santa process. When you give your gift you have to spend the whole day doing stuff and at the end you give your gift and reveal you’re their secret Santa (it was honestly a long process that was kinda burdensome for anyone involved) and with Yunho it would be way too awkward.

It was after work and you usually walk back to your place with Seonghwa since you both lived on the same floor(Yunho and San both lived in the same building as well).

It was a bit awkward for you both when you found out. For the first month, you both thought that the other was following the other. And you both happened to confront each other at the same time and had a good awkward laugh after. After that you two waited for each other after work but never talked as you walked next to each other. It literally took months for you and Seonghwa to start a conversation, a simple “Hi, how are you?” Small talk, eventually you two became really close friends.

“Hwa, I’m being serious,” he was looking at you completely unamused, already tired of your whining. “I need you to trade with me,” “Look, Y/N, I know that whatever feud you have with Yunho is a big deal or whatever but either way unless he trades with someone, which no one is going to, you’re gonna he stuck with him all day anyways.” You know he’s right, but you’re really not having it. “Sweetheart, you’re just gonna have to be a big girl and suck it up,” Seonghwa wrapped his arm around you as he pulled you into him and kissed your cheek.

You and Seonghwa didn’t date, which surprised everyone who asked, you two were just overly flirty but had no real interest in each other.

You both walked hand in hand and side by side going into the building and of course(with your shit luck) Yunho was there with San talking near the entrance.

“Oh! Y/N! Seonghwa!” You sighed loudly and rolled your eyes which caused Seonghwa to squeeze your hand tighter warning you to stop. He steered you towards their direction, and by steered I mean dragged.

“Yunho. San.” Seonghwa addressed them awkwardly.

“San…” you smiled at him gently.

San looked between you and Seonghwa awkwardly as you two were still holding hands and you were practically leaning on him. You let go of Seonghwa’s hand but still kept your position next to him.

You glanced to Yunho and saw him looking away with his jaw clenched,

“How about we go get dinner together?”

“Ummm… you know… I’m not really hungry…” you were honestly really hungry but you didn’t want to go eat with Yunho. “No come on! I’ll buy?” He hit your weak spot and he knew it.

“Fine… but I want ice cream after.” San rolled his eyes but agreed and made everyone pile into his car.

You sat in the back with Seonghwa while you drove to San’s favourite restaurant that conveniently was on the other side of town during traffic hour. You were getting bored since your phone died at work earlier in the day.

After about 10 minutes of staring out the back window at the traffic Seonghwa gave you one of his earbuds so you could listen to music with him. You leaned against his shoulder and closed your eyes since it felt like you were gonna be stuck in traffic for forever.

Eventually you got to the restaurant since Seonghwa woke you up saying we have to hurry before San orders without us. San was long gone and it was only you, Seonghwa, and Yunho in the car. You blinked at him confused, “cute” he winked at you and pecked your lips. You jumped as you heard the car door slam shut as Yunho walked into the restaurant.

Seonghwa chuckled and opened the door to go in the restaurant. You sat there for a second completely confused, Seonghwa has never kissed you in front of other people before so that really messed your mind up.

No one other than you, san, and Seonghwa knew about you two. You were best friends but sometimes there would be a few hookups here and there. It wasn’t really that serious between you two, and there was no romantic feelings between you and Seonghwa. It’s just… sometimes when he spends the night… it’ll be a little more than sleeping… but that's no ones business… except San… because he’s joined before…

After you got over your little moment you got out the car yourself and caught up with Seonghwa.

You were honestly confused about what was happening and why everyone was acting funny but you decided to just push it to the back of your mind and just enjoy the dinner.

It was a cute diner that’s been here forever, and you and San usually come alone but since everyone is deciding to be an ass the whole world had to join as well. You got your usual, a waffle (even though it was dinner time) and Yunho got what he always used to get when you came in high school, a bacon cheeseburger with curly fries. San and Seonghwa both got a whole pizza.

Everyone was talking besides you, it honestly wasn’t because you were uncomfortable, it was it just because you missed being able to do this. You missed going out with your friends and not having to worry about Yunho picking on you every 5 seconds.

You found yourself staring at Yunho. This was the first time you both came back here after fighting and declaring you both hated each other.

Even though it was on the opposite side of town, Yunho had a license and always drove you two to get burgers and share a milkshake.

You’re probably being over emotional but you start to tear up and Yunho isn’t completely oblivious to you so he notices and stares at your teary eyes not knowing what to do.

You pull yourself together once you get your food, “Y/N- you’re such a loser, why do you always get breakfast?” San eyes your waffle suspiciously. “Is there Crack in it or something?” You fling some of your tea at him, “No you idiot, I just like waffles…” he rolls his eyes and shrugs as Seonghwa asks for you to feed him a bite of your waffle.

You stare down at your plate contemplating if you really want to share your waffle but in the end you agree and cut him a piece and feed him the waffle.

“Mhmm, it almost tastes as good as you…” you snap your eyes to Seonghwa as he winks at you. You hear someone suck in their breath and you’re literally so confused on what is wrong with everyone. You decide to ignore Seonghwas comment and go back to eating your waffle silently while Seonghwa and San talk with Yunho occasionally adding his input.

You were honestly eyeing Yunho’s curly fries the whole time since you literally haven’t eaten them since high school. You’re looking down at your waffle and you see Yunho grab a handful of his curly fries and place them onto your plate. You look up at him and you send him an appreciative smile and he could see back when y'all were 16.

If you were to ask Yunho what happened to your friendship, you’d get a completely different answer.

Back in 9th grade when you got a boyfriend, he was honestly truly happy for you. Sure he was jealous that he didn’t have you to himself but it was to be expected.

One night someone came to his house really late. It was Felix, your boyfriend. As soon as he opened the door, a fist came in contact with his nose. Long story short Felix told him to stay away from “his girlfriend” because you are “his” and he can’t afford losing you to “someone like him.”

After that he didn’t go to school for the next few days because of the bruising, avoided your calls and texts, then after awhile completely pretended you didn’t exist.

He knew how much it hurt you. 9 years of friendship, down the drain. Just because of some stupid boy who doesn’t even know how to treat you. Yunho loved you. He had been in love with you since he could remember. You obviously didn’t like him because you two were best friends, but to Yunho it was okay. He was okay with just being friends because he didn’t want to lose you.

After you broke up with Felix, you tried fixing the relationship between you and Yunho, but he had built his walls back up and started arguing with you as a defense mechanism. It wasn’t the healthiest of all things to do since it caused the both of you to completely stop talking until you both somehow got the same job.

It leads to now, where he’s giving you all his fries because he knows they’re your favourite. It doesn’t matter how much you two argue, he always gives you what you want, even though you don’t know it.

Everyone is done with their food and you excuse yourself to go outside. While you were coming in you saw this store that sold different paintings and posters. There is customised art you can make with an audio and they will paint the auto waves.

You sent the artist a voice message that you still have with Yunho. It was you apologising after one of the first fights you had. The whole voice memo was basically you telling Yunho how much you love him and you’ll be his friend forever while sobbing.

This was basically going to be your “Look I don’t know what happened, but let’s start over because I still love you so much” gift.

You quickly placed your order and went back to the restaurant and saw San paying. You wrap your arms around Sans shoulders, “Thank you San-a. You’re the best.” He turns around and brings you into a hug, “So… how about the icecream now?”

You quickly pull away, “Okay! Let’s now!” San and Seonghwa both laughed as Yunho rolled his eyes in the back while hiding a smile. Everyone knew ice cream was your favourite, chocolate chip cookie dough, that’s the one you always got.

The 4 of you walked to the ice cream parlour on the next block. San and Seonghwa were immersed in a conversation walking ahead of you and Yunho.

You and Yunho were walking side by side completely quiet, the tension was so thick you could physically feel it.

“So, who’d you get for secret Santa?” Yunho slowed down a little bit for the both of you to talk. “Oh, umm it’s called secret Santa for a reason, it's a secret” you look up at Yunho with a small smile. “Mhm… that’s fair I guess” he says with a small laugh.

“So… what about you? Who’d you get?” He laughs loudly at your question, “What?! I thought it was a secret? You’re not gonna tell me yours but you want me to tell you mine? What a cheat!” You elbow him in the side and roll your eyes.

“How about… we both give hints?” At this point you were both aware you got each other, and you were both just picking for fun.

He Yunho pretended to think for a few seconds, “okay, fine… so… the person I got… SHE is someone I care about. Like a lot. And I don’t think she knows it anymore but maybe after I get the gift she’ll remember all the good things that happened with us…” you both had stopped waking. You could feel your heart beating faster and you could feel yourself breathing harder.

You nodded, “y-yeah. Mine. Umm… is also to a person I care a lot about… and I hope after I give him the present it’ll clear things up… you know? And it might not be a lot, but it was really fucking expensive so he better appreciate it.” You told Yunho before winking at him.

You were walking off to catch up with Seonghwa and San who didn’t even notice you two were gone.

“Wait!” You turn around to see Yunho jogging after you. “What?” You stop and turn around. “You already got your present? We just got our people today,” you smiled at him, “No, I placed the order already. It should be ready to get picked up in a few days.” Yunho blinks at you confused but nods anyway.

You and Yunho are still walking side by side as you both enter the ice cream shop, “You want the usual?” You agree without even thinking about how Yunho knows what ice cream you get.

You go to sit with Seonghwa at the booth at the back of the parlour.

Seonghwa sits staring at you for a good 30 seconds before you break, “What are you doing? Why are you eye fucking me? You and San have both been acting weird all day.” Seonghwa looks behind you quickly before leaning in to the point where your noses were touching. You involuntarily look down to his lips and you can feel your cheeks start to get red, “I really don’t know what you mean Y/N. Can I not just appreciate my best friend?”

He licks his lips as he tilts his head. Your lips were brushing and you could feel his smirk against your lips, “I mean, when you’re practically making out with me… isn’t that a bit more than appreciating?”

“Here’s your ice cream Hwa,” San came rushing to the table practically throwing Seonghwa’s cup to him.

You pulled away from Seonghwa and turned your body the opposite direction to calm yourself down. You rested your cool hands on your burning cheeks as you saw Yunho wasn’t far behind San.

You’re not really sure what Seonghwa is doing but it’s most definitely supposed to make someone jealous, you’re not completely oblivious to what’s happening. You’re just not sure who… Either San or Yunho, and you don’t understand why he would ever try to make San jealous, so it had to be Yunho.

You were really confused but decided to play along with whatever game San and (mostly) Seonghwa were playing. All you had to do was flirt shamelessly, right? It couldn’t be that hard, you just had to pay attention to Yunho’s reactions at the same time.

Yunho handed you your waffle cone and you took it with a smile. You exchanged a look with San that told him you knew what they were doing. He looked at Seonghwa, who was looking at you, and elbowed him in the side. Seonghwa smirked at you and looked back down at his ice cream. You looked back at San and kicked him on his shin as a warning.

The whole time Yunho was looking between the three of you trying to figure out what was happening. Yunho decided to ignore whatever was happening but made a note to ask San about it later.

Yunho wasn’t particularly fond of Seonghwa. But Seonghwa was your best friend and he had no control over it. There wasn’t any need for him to be that flirty with you. I mean yeah, all best friends are like that but you don’t go kissing your best friend for no reason. Right? Yunho could tell you were kinda confused on what was happening as well but he also saw you went along with it. So it obviously wasn’t unwanted… Yunho was just really confused. He was jealous too. He knew he had no right to be jealous because he wasn’t dating you, you couldn’t even really call each other friends anymore.

You looked around a little to see if anyone was paying attention to you. San and Yunho were in a conversation about their upcoming project for work, and Seonghwa was sitting on his phone.

You move move your foot to start rubbing on Seonghwa’s lower leg. He looks up at you then to Yunho, who’s not paying attention, then back to his phone.

You continue to eat your ice cream pretending that you don’t know what your doing, you have to be really careful. San probably won’t notice, but Yunho is sitting right next to you and has a clear view of under the table.

You stop, but leave your foot where it is. You finish the rest of your ice cream, and decide to keep messing with Seonghwa.

Your legs are a lot shorter than you originally think, so you scoot forward causing Seonghwa to put his phone down and look at you. You look at him as innocently as possible as he shakes his head in a warning.

You slide your foot up to rest on his thigh. Seonghwa looks at you with a smile before bouncing his leg causing you to bang your knee on the underneath of the table, “ow fuck!” Yunho and Sans attention turns to you, and Yunho looks under the table to see your foot on Seonghwa’s thigh. He looks between you and Seonghwa, “you good?” He asks you awkwardly, “She’s fine.” Yunho looks to you and you nod in reassurance.

Yunho looks at you a little bit longer then turns to continue his conversation with San. Seonghwa is laughing to himself as you get a surge of confidence and place your foot on his crotch. He groans loudly with wide eyes and once again, all the attention is on you two.

You quickly move your foot back to his thigh, and you look at Seonghwa with wide eyes. San and Yunho both snap their heads to Seonghwa and you look around pretending you didn’t hear anything.

San looked at you with wide eyes. You shake your head knowing what he’s asking. He raises his eyebrows at you and you bite your lip while looking down. San snorts as he’s looking at Yunho’s confused expression, “So, Seonghwa… how's your project going?” San winks at you as you move your foot to go back to his crotch. Seonghwa looks between you and San and if looks could kill, you’d both be dead.

“Umm… you know, we’re almost done. And I-It’ll be d-done probably by F-Friday.” You’re putting more pressure on his length with your foot and you start to move it slowly.

You can see Seonghwa’s face start to get red. His fist is clenched on top of the table and you can see his knuckles turning white.

“Are you okay… Seonghwa?” Seonghwa lifts his face from his hands and shoots Yunho a look, “I’m fine.” Yunho nods and gets on his phone awkwardly.

Seonghwa nods his head towards the restroom with raised eyebrows. You shake your head not wanting San to know what’s going to happen and leave Yunho confused. You contemplate if you should actually get up or not, but in the end you decide to go to the restroom, “Hey, I’ll be right back, I’m going to the restroom.” Yunho nods while San is looking at you with a knowing look.

You get up and go to the single-stalled family restroom to wait for Seonghwa. You take a second to look at yourself in the mirror and you can see your flushed cheeks and your dark eyes looking back at you. You see the door open behind you and before you can even turn around the door is locked and there’s a hand around your throat.

“You’re such a fucking slut, you’re really trying to get me off when there are people next to us? Huh? What if Yunho saw? What if San tells him what a fucking whore you are?” Your breathing becomes heavier as Seonghwa speaks in your ear.

“See, look at yourself in the mirror. Don’t you look like a whore letting me touch you in the restroom?” Seonghwa’s hands are moving lower down to your chest. “Answer me, Kitten.” You whine softly as you feel his mouth on your neck.

“Y-Yes. Yes, I’m being a whore for letting you t-touch me in the restroom.” Seonghwa starts leaving small marks on your neck.

“Mhmm… right, my whore.” He turns your body to where you’re facing him.

“I’m gonna tell you what’s gonna happen okay?” you nod as you move to attach your lips to Seonghwa’s neck. “You’re gonna suck me off, then we’re gonna go back and pretend this didn’t happen, yeah? Then when we get back to the apartment, I’ll take care of you. Deal?” you start to argue but stop since you know it’s not gonna get you anything so you agree and continue to mark Seonghwa’s neck with your pretty pink marks.

Seonghwa runs his hands down your hair, he grabs a chunk of it and pulls you back, “You better hurry kitten before Yunho notices we’ve been gone for too long.

You sink down to your knees and unbutton Seonghwa’s pants. He’s already hard so you can see the strain left on both his jeans and boxers. You look up at him once more for conformation, and once he nods his head you reach to grab his length from in his boxers. You stare for a second before tightening your grip and moving your hand slowly.

You hear Seonghwa groan from above you and it only gives you the confidence to bring yourself closer and place the head on your tongue. You smile as you can feel the weight of him on your tongue and you look up at him with the most innocent look you can give.

You close your mouth around the tip and he moves to hold your face in one of his hands. “Fuck, you’re so pretty kitten.” You smile softly while taking more of his length in your mouth.

You feel him grab the back of your hair and take that as a cue to move your hands to his thighs. “Tap my thighs if you need me to stop, okay?” You close your eyes and he takes it as an okay to continue.

He strokes your hair softly for a few seconds before starting to slowly move his hips. He’s holding your head with both of his hands and started to go deeper and faster. You could feel your eyes start to water already and you quickly thank yourself for not wearing any makeup today.

Seonghwa was getting desperate. His precum coming out more frequently, he was snapping his hips harshly as wet, gagging sounds filled the air around you. He pushes your head all the way down his cock until your nose was touching his pubic bone. You gripped his thigh tighter as you focused on breathing through your nose.

You opened your eyes for a second, catching Seonghwa’s eyes as he was looking down at you. He throws his head back as he moans your name loudly. He was so close, you could feel him twitching in your mouth as he held your head still.

You tapped on his thigh a few times and he immediately pulls out of your mouth. You take in a big breath as you see a string of saliva connecting from the tip of his dick to your lips.

He was looking down at your fucked out face. Your checks were tinted a rose colour, your eyelashes were wet with tears, and your swollen lips wet with saliva.

He moves his hand from your head and holds your face gently in his hands, wiping your tears from your face.

You move to take his cock in your hand once again and this time your both a lot more gentle. He watches you softly as you slowly kiss down his length before carefully placing the head back in your mouth.

You suck softly on the head and you’re starting to find it hard not to touch yourself. You whine as your taking more of his length into your mouth, “I know kitten, we’ll go back soon. I’ll take good care of you kitten, just wait okay?” You nod softly as you grip the rest of his length.

“Gonna let me cum in your mouth? Gonna swallow it all like a good kitten?” You look up at Seonghwa and whine loudly. You pull off his cock with a popping sound as you look up and open your mouth for him.

He looks down at you with your eyes on his face and your mouth open ready to catch all his cum in your mouth like a good kitten.

He grips his cock and continued to get himself off in front of your face. “S-such a good kitten, good girl. Fuck, let-letting me cum on your face in the restroom. S-so good… sucking my cock like a little whore in the restroom, t-then going out and talking to o-our friends. I-It's okay right? B-because you’re my whore right?” You felt like you could cum untouched at this point.

You moaned loudly and that was all it took for him to cum. You were able to catch most of his cum in your mouth and some sprinkled your cheeks and chin.

You waited until he gave you the okay then you closed your mouth to swallow. You opened your mouth to show you swallowed and Seonghwa strokes your hair, whispering praises.

He tucks himself back in his pants and gives you a hand to help you up. He looks around for a second before getting a paper towel and wetting it so he can carefully wipe the cum off your face.

“Turn around kitten,” you turn around and you get a good look at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes widen as you see how you look. “S-Seonghwa… it looks like I just got fucked in the restroom,” he laughs as he’s trying his best to fix your hair. “You’re not wrong,” you turn around and snack his chest.

You look back in the mirror and you see the hickey’s covering your neck and jaw. You start whining about the marks but then see you see the marks you left on Seonghwa’s neck so you stop.

“I tried my best kitten, you go first,” he kisses you gently and he brings his hand down to cup your crotch, “I’ll take care of you in a minute, just be a good girl.” You let out a quiet moan and move so you can unlock the door and walk out.

Seonghwa looks at you with a smirk as you pause to look out the door to make sure no one is there. You look back at Seonghwa and he nods at you to go. You look at the clock on the wall 8:58, you’ve been in the restroom for around 25 minutes. You walk back to the table thinking of excuses to tell if they ask, even though San was well aware of what you were doing.

You sat back down next to Yunho awkwardly trying your best to cover the right side of your face with your hair.

“Why were you in the restroom so long?” You snapped your head up in San’s direction. “What?” He’s such a little shit, “you heard me,” you looked towards Yunho and he was scanning your face expectantly. “Umm… you know… girl problems…” he pretended to nod in understanding. Yunho looked back down at his phone with cheeks red with embarrassment.

After a couple more minutes Seonghwa comes back to the table, “So, are we ready to go?” You look down with a smile. “Where were you?” You roll your eyes and look up at San. You turn and see Yunho scanning Seonghwa, his eyes widen and he looks over at you with the same expression.

You’re completely aware they can both see all of Seonghwa’s hickeys and if you’re not careful, they’re both going to be able to see yours too.

Seonghwa completely ignores the question and gets up, “Alrighty, I don’t know about yall but I’m tired so we should get going.” You nod and get up to join Seonghwa. When you get up you shuffle uncomfortably, your underwear is sticking to your core and you can feel how uncomfortable it is.

San and Yunho are both blinking up at you two and Yunho shrugs and stands up as well. Seonghwa starts to walk out of the shop and he puts his hand out for you to take it. You grab his hand and walk quickly to catch up with him.

Neither of you are really paying attention to if Yunho and San are behind you. You’re both walking really fast towards the restaurant that’s down the street so you can go to sans car.

“Are they dating?” Sans head turns to Yunho. “Sorry, what?” San looks ahead to see you and Seonghwa walking hand in hand. “Umm… no… They’re just really close. Best friends.” If he was being honest, he has no idea if yall were dating. He thought it was just hookups occasionally, but sometimes you two look like a couple.

“Are you sure they’re not more than friends? Like… you know… you saw his neck.” San had no idea what to tell him. Yunho had told San about what had happened between the two of you, and he told San that he really likes you.

San sighed heavily, “Yunho, you shouldn’t ask questions you don’t want the answer to.” Yunho looked at San, “Really? Is that what they were doing in the restroom?” Fuck. “You know, Yunho, I’m not sure. Maybe. But look, they’re best friends. They’ve been best friends for over 5 years now. They’re closer than anyone else. Yunho they’re probably closer than you two were. But I can tell you right now, yeah they might hookup every once in a while, but there isn’t any romantic attraction.” Yunho is staring at the two of you like he just saw a ghost.

“How, how are you sure about that?” San rolls his eyes, “You really need to stop asking questions. This thing between them has been going on for maybe 3 out of the 5 years they’ve been friends. They’ve both dated since they’ve been friends, it stops. When y/n got a boyfriend last year, they stopped hooking up. If there were romantic feelings, they wouldn’t have dated or they would be dating each other.” Yunho nods but he really doesn’t look so sure. He feels a pang of jealousy as he sees Seonghwa lean down to whisper something in your ear.

“How do you know so much?” San ignored Yunho’s question and kept walking. “No san, I’m serious. Do you… do it too… with Seonghwa?” San still didn’t answer his question, “Yunho, what did I just tell you? I just told you to stop asking questions you don’t want the answer to,” Yunho sighed heavily, “Why?” San looked at him like he was crazy, “what do you mean why?” Yunho rolled his eyes, “you know exactly what I’m asking San. Is it the same as Seonghwa? Just to hookup?” San nodded, “look, I don’t like her as more than a friend. None of us do, just you. And if you choose to pursue your feelings, then go for it.”

“Seonghwa shut up they’re gonna hear you,” the whole time yall were walking Seonghwa was saying what he wants to do to you out loud. Seonghwa smirks as he sees the car in the parking lot. He turns around and sees Yunho and San are a significant distance behind you two. As you both approach the car he grabs your hips and pushes you against the car.

“Hwa, they're gonna see us…” you moan loudly as he sticks his knee between your legs. He presses his knee against your core as he leans forward brings you into a kiss. Seonghwa is softly rubbing at your side as he brushes his tongue against your bottom lip.

You always forget how good of a kisser Seonghwa is, his lips are soft and it always makes you feel like you’re in heaven.

You whine as he takes his knee from between your legs. “Hwa please, I cant… fuck,” you needed to be touched so bad. “Kitten, do you want San and Yunho to see? Maybe you do huh? Are me and San not enough? Do you want Yunho too? Do you want Yunho to see what a little whore you are? Want him to fuck you too?” You shake your head, “N-no I just, I just need you to touch me” he rolled his eyes looking down at you. “If you don’t stop being a brat I’m not-“ he got cut off as you heard the car door unlock.

Seonghwa cupped your core again, “you’re gonna sit with your legs open, okay kitten? So everyone will be able to smell how sweet you are.”

You opened the door and scooted to the end. Seonghwa came in after you and sat in the middle. He pulled your leg to go over his and he rested his hand on your inner thigh. You looked towards him as he laughed, “I can smell how wet you are,” you looked at Seonghwa before you stuck your hand in your pants. Seonghwa immediately grabbed your wrist and tried to take your hand out of your jeans, “what the fuck are you doing? You groaned, “touching myself since you’re not touching me.”

When you heard the door open you took your hand out of your pants, “oh my god, you’re such a fucking brat” Seonghwa said while Yunho was getting in the car. Seonghwa left his hand on your thigh, part of his hand resting on your core.

San got in the car shortly after Yunho, “What’re y'all in such a rush for?” San turns to see if any cars are coming and he sees Seonghwa’s hand practically on your crotch. He snickers and goes back to pulling out of the parking, “Umm… no reason in particular, we’re just tired.” San hums in understanding, “I’m pretty tired too, how about all four of us go take a nap together?” San winks at you in the rearview mirror. Seonghwa laughs next to you as your cheeks turn red.

“Answer him.” You turn to Seonghwa and you shake your head. San looks at you in the mirror again with that stupid smirk, “Umm… you can join if you want…” Yunho looks to San with a clenched jaw now that he knows what they’re talking about.

“I will if Yunho joins,” you whine softly as Seonghwa rubs up and down your clothed core. You reach a red light and San turns to watch what Seonghwa is doing.

You can sense that Yunho is probably uncomfortable so you try your best to ignore what’s happening. You close your eyes and bring your hands up to your face, “Y-Yunho probably doesn’t want to.” San bites his lip and turns to Yunho, “Do you want to?”

You’re fully expecting Yunho to say no since he probably already knows what’s happening. Seonghwa places pressure straight on your clit and starts to make small circles. You’re still parked at the light even though it’s now green. It’s past 9 and there are no cars out on a Wednesday night.

“Y-Yes I’ll Umm… I’ll join…” you whine loudly and close your legs as you were so close to cumming. “S-Seonghwa, I’m- I can’t, please,” he strokes your thigh softly, “I know kitten it’s okay, go ahead.” You see San look towards Yunho. Yunho is still looking forward, probably out of embarrassment. “Wait, Seonghwa, scoot over so Yunho can see Y/N,”

Seonghwa moves to the other seat so you can move and be in the middle. “Yunho, why don’t you look and see how pretty my kitten is?” Seonghwa tells Yunho to look in your direction. Seonghwa unbuttons your pants and sticks his hand into your underwear.

Seonghwa runs his fingers down your slit, collecting all of your juices on his fingers. He pulls his hand out of your pants to show his wet fingers.

Yunho looks back in time for Seonghwa to offer his wet fingers to San who’s now palming himself. You watch San suck on Seonghwa’s fingers with a whine. “You wanna touch her?” Seonghwa asks San as he pulls his fingers out of his mouth. “I can wait, wanna touch her properly,” Seonghwa looks to Yunho and as expected he shakes his head.

Seonghwa shrugs as he sticks his hands back in your pants, this time inserting a finger into you. You start to whine and moan loudly, “Fuck, Seonghwa please. I need to cum. I’ll be good now, I promise.” You can feel all 3 pairs of eyes on you. Seonghwa and San are both staring at you with zero hesitation and Yunho is taking glances at you every few seconds, “Kitten, your such a whore,” Yunho’s eyebrows shoot up as he hears Seonghwa calling you names. Seonghwa adds another finger and starts to move them as fast as he can with your pants constricting his hand. “Fuck, San, look at our whore, how she’s begging to cum like a little bitch. So desperate kitten. You like the attention don’t you? Me and San just weren’t enough to please you huh?” You’re moaning uncontrollably now as Seonghwa looks up to Yunho, “Now you need Yunho too huh? You need Yunho to help us fuck you right?”

Yunho is looking at you and Seonghwa with wide eyes then turns to look at San who has a smirk on his face. San looks down at Yunho’s bulge. San grabs one of Yunho’s fists that’s resting on his leg and moves it to press on his bulge.

The pressure that San adds to Yunho’s hand makes him whimper. San freezes and looks at Yunho with a shocked expression, “Did- did you…” Yunho flushes red as he continues to palm himself.

Your eyes shoot up to Yunho when you hear the noise he made, “fuck fuck fuck,” Seonghwa himself is shocked but he’s more focused on you right now, “You didn’t answer my question kitten, You weren’t satisfied with the two of us huh? You want yunho to join so he can help us fuck you. Since two cocks isn’t enough for you.” You nod vigorously, “Fuck, yes. I need Y-Yunho’s cock too. I need 3 cocks t-to make me S-satisfied cause I’m a wh-whore.”

Hearing you say that made Yunho start to moan loudly, “F-Fuck, Yunho” you’re staring at his face. He looks so pretty with his cheeks flushed and his mouth open to let out his pretty moans. “You S-sound, fuck, you sound so pretty,” he bites his lip to keep his smile from showing.

Yunho lets out more of his pretty moans and you can’t hold it anymore. Your legs start to shake as you cum, hard. You’re letting out pornagraphic moans and you can’t stop.

Seonghwa kisses your forehead and San strokes your calf. You eventually open your eyes and see Yunho biting his lip with a pained expression on his face, “Y-Yunho?” You started carefully “I wish you could see how pretty you look… You look so pretty right now, you’re doing so well.” Everyone’s eyes are on Yunho but he doesn’t even notice.

Seonghwa carefully buttons your pants back up and you sit up with a grimace. You scoot up the seat and you take Yunho’s face in your hand. Yunho starts to breathe louder and his whimpers become louder, filling the car. You look to both San and Seonghwa who are both looking at you and Yunho intently, you hesitate before you say “puppy… can you be good and cum for me?” You hear Seonghwa take in a breath behind you but you’re focused on how pretty Yunho is. Yunho lets out a choked moan as he cums in his pants. You whisper praises to him while playing with his hair.

He opens his eyes and you kiss him softly on his forehead, “you okay?” He gives you the softest smile and nods. You move back in your seat and you look at San, “did you…” he knows what you mean and chuckles, “yeah, like 5 minutes before you did,” you roll your eyes and laugh, “should’ve known, you’re always first.” Laughter fills the car clearing away any awkwardness left. You turn to Seonghwa and ask the same question, “nope, I’d rather cum in you” he tells you with a wink. You turn away without saying anything to look out the window with your flushed cheeks.

San finally continues driving after 30 minutes of sitting at the light, “So… Yunho…” he turns to give Yunho a knowing look. Seonghwa laughs next to you knowing what San is gonna say. “You’re a sub huh? And a bottom?” You bite your lip to contain your smile as you continue looking out the window.

Yunho clears his throat, “I- I don’t know what you’re talking about…” San and Seonghwa both snort loudly as you try your best to control your laughter. “Yeah, right… puppy…” he groans loudly and covers his face in his hands. You giggle softly, “Leave my puppy alone San, you’re just jealous I don’t call you anything cute.” Seonghwa rolls his eyes at the both of you, “y'all are idiots, stop the car, I'd rather walk back.” San jokingly pulls over and stops the car, “okay, bye.” You watch as Seonghwa stares at San with wide eyes. “W-wait… I was just kidding, I love you both” you start laughing and hitting Seonghwa.

Yall continue driving in a comfortable silence. Everyone’s heart is beating a little faster as you get closer to the apartment. The car is starting to fill with a sexual tension you could practically taste. You were all shifting uncomfortably since you all, besides Seonghwa, came in your underwear at some point.

San pulls into his parking spot faster than he’s ever had. All four of you practically jump out of the car and run to the elevator. The four of you all have rooms on different floors of the apartment. Yunho was about to ask who’s room but when Seonghwa immediately presses the floor to your place he looks at you confused, “I have the biggest bed, it usually fits us three but I’m sure it’ll be fine with you.” Yunho nods in understanding. “Yeah, she really splurged on her bed! It’ll fit all four of us just fine.” San has always loved your bed. He always came over for sleepovers and movie nights just so he can lay on your bed.

The elevator opens and you all just stand there waiting for the first person to walk out. You roll your eyes and walk out first taking the key from your bag and going to the end of the hall to go to your place.

Everyone follows behind you as you walk inside your apartment. San and Seonghwa practically live here with you, but Yunho has never been here before so you try and give him a quick tour. “Umm, so Yunho, let me just give you a quick tour. This is the kitchen here to the left. Then this is the living room.” You gestured to the area around you. You walked further into the room and lead Yunho into the hall where all the rooms are. “The first door to the left is the guest restroom. And the door at the end, on the left is the guest room and the one on the right is the master bedroom, my room, with the master bathroom.”

Yunho looks around trying to take in the information, “I don’t know about you two, but we’re gonna go fuck now.” Seonghwa takes your hand and leads you to your bedroom. He leaves the door open as he picks you up and places you in the middle of your bed.

You wrap your legs around his waist as he starts to kiss down your neck to your chest. “Seonghwa! Why are you so impatient? I haven’t touched her all day.” San came into the room complaining. You opened your eyes to look at San. You smile as you signal him to come towards you.

You look back once again and see Yunho standing by the door, not sure what to do. If you were being honest, you didn’t really know what to do either. It was always just Seonghwa and San, and now that Yunho’s here too you feel the need to pay extra attention to him.

Seonghwa is already lifting your shirt to kiss your stomach. “I- Yu- fuck… Seonghwa-” he lifted your shirt completely off and started to suck on your chest through your bra.

“W-wait Seonghwa…” he stops and looks up at you, “G-get off for a second…” he complains but gets off anyway. He moves to lay where San is sitting as you sit up.

You look up and see Yunho staring at your chest. You smile, “Yun- Puppy, come here please.” He looks between you and the two boys next to you. “It’s alright, they won’t say anything…” he nods and walks towards you and sits right in front of you. “Are you, Are you okay? You don’t have to stay if you don’t want to.” He looks at you and nods while looking at your lips. “I need you to use your words puppy.” He whines quietly, “I-It’s okay. I want to stay.”

You nod and push him back softly so he’s laying down on his back, “Tell me if you want me to stop, okay puppy?” You hold his face gently in your hands. You’re straddling his waist and you take a minute to look at him. You missed Yunho so much. You were staring so intently and lovingly into his eyes, and you knew he knew what you were trying to tell him.

If you didn’t do something, anything, you were going to start crying and no one wants a shirtless crying girl to be sitting on them. You lean down to take him into a kiss.

Seonghwa and San are both giving each other a look knowing this could most likely be the last time this is going to happen, unless Yunho is into that…

You take Yunho's bottom lip into your mouth and you suck on it gently. Yunho starts to breathe heavier as he opens his mouth to allow access to your tongue. You and Yunho both know why you’re being so gentle, you’re trying your best to make up for everything that’s happened.

Yunho whimpers quietly as you pull away. He chases your lips and you peck his lips softly. He has his fists clenched beside him as his eyes move down to your chest and stomach. “You can touch me,” he slowly places his hands on your waist, “Y-You’re so pretty.” Your heart felt like it could burst. You were looking at Yunho with the biggest heart eyes, “Not prettier than you puppy,” his cheeks tinted with a pink as he looks away from you.

You look towards Seonghwa and San for the first time. They both pulled their length out of their pants and were watching You and Yunho while jerking themselves off.

You smile to yourself again while watching as Yunho’s breathing becomes more labored. You scoot yourself lower and feel Yunho’s bulge on your crotch.

You reach to pull Yunho’s shirt off and as your taking it off you can see all of his pretty flushed skin. He covers his face with his hands, “Don’t cover your face puppy, you’re so pretty. Look at how pretty you look right now, you look so fucked out and I haven’t even touched you properly.” You move to kiss down his neck and to his chest and stomach. As you make your way down to his stomach you leave marks all the way down to the top of his jeans.

“You okay puppy?” He moans loudly as you take your tongue and lick between his nipples. “Mhm, I’m okay.” You could feel his hips struggling not to move against your core. “Do you want me to touch you?” Yunho have you a small nod in response, “I need you to use your big boy voice puppy.” He looks at you with pleading eyes, “I- Uhh… I want you to t-touch me p-please.”

You look back over to where the two boys are, “you think I should touch him as he pleases?” San pretends to think, “you know… I wouldn’t… I’d make him wait…” Seonghwa shrugs, “I dunno, but I wanna touch you, so that’s what I’m gonna do.” You squeal as Seonghwa pulls you off of Yunho and pushes you down harshly on the bed.

You roll your eyes at Seonghwa, “You're so impatient, you can’t even wait 20 minutes.” You gasp as Seonghwa pulls down both your pants and your panties at the same time. “F-fuck. Come here Yunho,” San told Yunho to join the three of you. Seonghwa had completely pulled off the clothing on the bottom half of your body, and he was now holding your legs open. San moves to the top part of your body and reached down to undo your bra.

Seonghwa is holding your legs open so Yunho could see the juices soaking your core. “You can touch her, you know. I promise she’ll like it.” Yunho looks at me for conformation, “It’s okay. You can touch me puppy.”

San was looking at you with an amazed expression. He’s never seen this side of you, your Dom side. They never really gave you a chance but he’s never really seen you as someone who could Dom because you look so soft.

San never took Yunho as a Sub either. But when he was laying underneath you and even now when he’s asking you for permission, it fits him. Yunho usually has this strong boy persona when he’s with you and it’s his first time seeing him so… desperate.

Yunho carefully takes two of his fingers and runs then up your core. You moan loudly and try to close your legs but Seonghwa is holding them. San and Seonghwa are both staring at Yunho as he’s staring at your core like it’s not real.

Yunho slowly inserts two of his fingers into you and you arch your back softly starting to grip San’s thigh. “Is- is it okay?” Yunho whispers as he starts to move his fingers slowly. “S-So good puppy. You’re doing so good.” You’re moaning quietly as you’re looking down to his chest and stomach.

“puppy, can you take off your pants for me?” You look to Seonghwa and he has a smirk on his face, “it’s okay puppy, I just wanna see how pretty you are.” Yunho looks to San and he nods to give Yunho some reassurance.

“Kitten, I’m gonna tell you what you’re going to do okay?” Seonghwa speaks up as Yunho starts to take his pants off. “You’re going fuck Yunho, then you’re gonna let me and San fuck you like the whore you are. And you’re going to let all 3 of us cum inside you.” You nod mindlessly as you’re watching Yunho slide his pants off. “And you’re going to cum for each of us.” Your head turns to San, “w-what? No, I won’t be able to…” San grabs your face in his hand, “yes you can, and you will.”

You turn back to Yunho and you keep your eyes trained on his bulge. You look back at his face when you hear a whimper come from his pretty lips. You sit up and you run your hands down to the waist of his boxers. “Can I?” You ask Yunho. “P-please.”

You smile softly at him and bring down his boxers to expose his length the the three of you. Your mouth drops slightly and you lick your lips. “Puppy, you’re so big…” he covers his face again as you softly graze his length with a finger. “Don’t cover your face or else I’m not gonna touch you, okay puppy?” He whines but takes his hands off his face and looks back at you.

Yunho was bigger than both San and Seonghwa. You grab him carefully and your fingers don’t even touch. Your heart is beating hard against your ribs and look look over to San who’s looking between Yunho and his length.

“Y/n?” You looked up at him “yes puppy?” He hesitates for a second before he finally says, “C-Can- Can I please you?” You let a huge smile come over your face, “come here puppy” you lay down on your back and bring him to lay on top of you.

You try to mentally prepare yourself, but you find yourself unable to contain the loud moan you release when you feel the head of his cock prob at your clit.

Yunho looks at you with his length in his hand, “C-Can I?” You nod as he grabs one of your hands in his.

Yunho readjusts himself above you, he lines up his erection with your entrance and you hold your breath. You feel the stretch of your walls and it’s something you haven’t felt this strongly in years. You squeeze your eyes shut and you squeeze Yunho’s hand tighter.

Yunho whines loudly as he first enters you but stops as he feels you tense up. “A-are you okay?” You nod, “y-yeah, fuck. Y-you can k-keep going.” Yunho slowly pushes himself all the way in and stops so you and adjust to him.

Yunho is whimpering above you and your rubbing his side softly, “y-you can move p-puppy.”

Yunho is moving slowly trying to let you get used to the feeling, “d-does it h-hurt?” You shake your head to get him to continue.

Yunho finally finds a comfortable pace and he held your hand and was staring at your face with the most loving look. You’re looking up at Yunho and he looks like he’s biting his lip so hard it’s going to draw blood, “P-Puppy, don’t- don’t hold your pretty noises in. I wanna hear you.”

He finally starts to let his noises out. His soft whines and moans were making your core throb as he was moving at a faster pace.

The room was being filled with moans and whimpers coming from you and Yunho, and groans coming from San and Seonghwa who were watching the two of you from the other side of the bed.

His thrusts become quick and sloppy, and the sound of skin slapping can be heard throughout your whole place. Everyone can tell your close, Yunho can feel you clenching around him and your moans become louder and more frequent.

Yunho brings himself down so he can go to kissing and sucking on your neck, and that’s it for you. You see stars behind your closed eyes as you feel waves of euphoria come over your whole body. His name comes out of your mouth like it’s the only word you know.

You can hear Yunho moaning above you as he stilled inside you. “F-fuck, puppy, you’re doing so well for me.” He slowly starts to move again and you wrap your legs around his waist trying to ignore the overstimulation.

You can hear his quiet moans in your ear and it urges you to want to make him cum, “You’re such a good boy, you’re doing so good for me. You sound so pretty. I wish I could hear your pretty moans all day.” You clench around him, Urging him to cum. “C-Can I c-cum please?” You smile and rub his back in a comforting manner, “yes puppy, cum for me please.” As soon as you gave him permission you felt his seed release inside of you.

His strength gave out as he let all his body weight go on top of you. His heavy breathing was all that could be heard as he places his head in the crook of your neck.

You bring one hand to rub his back and another hand to play with his hair, “You’re okay puppy. You did so well for you. Did such a good job for me.” You tilted your head so you can place kisses on the top of his head and on his forehead.

He carefully takes his head out of your neck and looks at you for a minute. You smile at him and place a kiss on his nose then down to his lips.

He pulls out of you with a grimace and you subconsciously clench to keep his cum inside you. Yunho moves to the side and San quickly replaces Yunho’s spot.

San reaches down to collect the cum that was coming out of your entrance and shoves two fingers into your core to put it back, “Hope that was nice, now I’m gonna fuck you like the whore you are.” San immediately puts his whole length into your entrance and starts moving right away.

He pulls out to see a mix of yours and Yunho’s cum on his cock. San flips you over so your laying on your stomach “gonna fuck you so hard you’re not gonna be able to walk tomorrow.” Your clenching around him impossibly hard as you can already feel the coil start to build in your stomach.

San grabs a chunk of your hair and pulls you up so you’re now in doggy style. Your arms are barely able to keep you up, “you like it don’t you? You like us fucking you like the whore you are. You like for us to treat you like the whore you are. I can tell your close, you gonna cum for me?”

Your arms gave out and the only thing holding you up is sans grip on your hips, your letting out muffled moans into the pillow. “You’re gonna cum whenever I tell you to okay? I want you to wait until I cum.” You try your best to nod your head.

You’re so close to cumming. You start to bring your hips back to meet Sans thrusts, “San, please… can’t, I- I need… fuck” your blabbering incoherently as San moves his hand down to rub your clit. “F-Fuck okay baby, c-cum- cum for me” you let your orgasm take over your body. When San let’s go of your hips you immediately sink into the bed. You feel San kiss down your back telling you praises.

Seonghwa flips you over carefully, “can you cum one more time for me kitten?” Your eyes are starting to become heavy but you nod anyways. “Use your words Kitten.” You whine from overstimulation as Seonghwa is rubbing his cock up and down your slit watching it get covered in the mixture of cum. “Y-yes. I can take it.” Seonghwa nods as he slowly sinks his cock into you with a groan. “If you need me to stop kitten, what’s the safe word?” You grip Seonghwa’s shoulders, “p-purple” Seonghwa kisses you gently “Good kitten.”

Seonghwa was being gentle. If you noticed it so would San, and probably even Yunho if he was paying attention earlier. He started off with a slow pace making sure to kiss every part of your face. Your heart was beating so hard in your chest that Seonghwa could probably hear it.

Your core was throbbing as Seonghwa was reaching deeper inside of you causing your orgasm to build up again.

“Fuck kitten, I’ve been waiting all day for this. How are you still so tight after being fucked so much?” Seonghwa was struggling to keep his Dom persona up. Seonghwa was breathing hard and his thrusts were begging to get sloppy.

The room was filled with Seonghwa’s heavy breathing and your moans, along with the wet squelching noises coming from your bottom half.

“S-Seonghwa, I’m gonna-” he nodded and kissed you softly. “It’s okay kitten. So am I.” You pull him into a kiss. You clenched around him as you came for the 4th time that night. His lips were muffling the moans that were spilling from your lips. It wasn’t long after you that he came, his lips still on yours.

Seonghwa pulled out of you carefully as he grabbed a tissue that was on your bedside table to wipe the mess of of his length. You heard both San and Seonghwa get off the bed and Yunho sat beside you playing with your hair.

You heard the water running and some doors open and close as Seonghwa came back with a wet towel to clean you off. He brought the towel in between your legs to clean all the cum from off your thighs and your core.

San came back with some fresh sheets and Yunho picked you up bridal style so San and Seonghwa could take the soiled sheets off your bed and place them in your laundry. San and Seonghwa quickly replaced the sheets on your bed and Yunho placed you back in the middle, “Kitten you need to go use the restroom,” you shake your head, not wanting to get up and go to the restroom. “Kitten, you really have to go. You know that.” You complained but got up and walked the best you could to the restroom.

Seonghwa and San both put their boxers back on and laid down on the bed, “Are you gonna lay down too or are you just gonna stand there?” San asked Yunho while rolling over to cuddle Seonghwa. “Umm… yeah I guess…” yunho already had put his boxers on so he walked to the other side of the bed and laid down a significant distance away from both San and Seonghwa.

You walked out of the restroom and grabbed someone’s shirt from the floor and put it on. You crawled onto the bed and laid down in between Yunho and Seonghwa. Seonghwa grabbed his phone from the bedside table and started scrolling through his social media.

“Hwa what time is it?” You asked with a yawn. Yunho had rolled and rested his head on your chest. You started playing with his hair as you were falling asleep, “11:42” Seonghwa replied.

“Oh shit, I gotta go, I promised my roommate I’d be there my midnight to watch a movie with him.” Everyone nodded and he said he’d lock the door on his way out. It was just you, Seonghwa, and Yunho laying down on the bed. You and Yunho were both half asleep and Seonghwa was on his phone.

After about 5 minutes Seonghwa said he was gonna head out too. He kissed you on the forehead and said bye to Yunho.

“Should I Umm.. should I go too?” Yunho whispered to you when Seonghwa had finally walked out of your place. “No it’s okay. U-unless you want to leave…” you felt him shake his head, “No. I’ll stay.” Your heart was beating against your ribs and you were certain Yunho could hear it since he was laying on your chest.

Yunho started to hold you and you rubbed his back and played with his hair. “Y-Yunho?” you whispered quietly. “Hmm?” You weren’t sure if this was the best time to bring this up, when you were both half naked, “I… I missed you. Like a lot. And I just wanna say I’m sorry for anything I ever did… And I know it probably doesn’t mean much to you… but I still love you so much and I’m so sorry I let anything get in between us.” You were tearing up and yunho pulled away from you to take your face in his hands.

“No no no. It wasn’t your fault.” You sat up and you just let the tears fall from your eyes, “No, it is Yunho. If… If I didn’t like you the way I did, I wouldn’t have said yes to Felix when he asked me out.” You looked down and played with a loose thread on the shirt you were wearing.

“It- it still isn’t your fault y/n. Look at me please.” You looked up to see Yunho looking down at you. “The only reason I stopped talking to you… I just gave up… Felix… Felix knew I liked you as more than a friend.” You looked at Yunho confused. “One day, he came to my house and when I opened the door… he punched me. He punched me and told me to stay away from you because “someone like me” doesn’t deserve “Someone Like You”” you blinked up at Yunho. “And after that I just gave up… I knew you were never going to like me because Felix was popular and smart and funny… and I was just me, your best friend.”

You hold Yunho’s face in your hands, “Yunho I liked you so much… I loved you… and I was just too embarrassed to tell you because I didn’t think you liked me…” Yunho scanned your face for any sense of you lying to him, but when he saw your teary eyes he knew you were telling the truth.

“And… Yunho… oh my god I feel like I’m in middle school again… I still like you a lot and I just… I don’t know. Never mind I’m being stupid.” Yunho shook his head and he pulled you into a kiss. Your heart felt like it was going to explode.

“Look, we can talk about it tomorrow okay? When we’re both dressed.” He pulls you back down so you can lay down.

You both lay in a comfortable silence, “Yunho, on Friday night, do you wanna go get dinner?” You feel him smile against your collarbone, “are you asking me on a date?” He asks while poking your side. “Mhm… then since I’m your secret Santa… we can go get your gift.” He laughs softly, “I would love to go on a date with you… and get a gift the same day? That sounds like a perfect day to me.”

You smile against the top of his head. You’re happy everything is back to normal, even after 6 years of “hating” each other, everything finally feels back in place now that you have Yunho by your side again.

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streetsofsecretswegone · 3 years

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@tcpimpabutterfly said : ✩—Nick & Janie

Under the cut because long!

Disagreements:

Who is more likely to raise their voice? Janie when she is entirely sick and FED UP of Nick’s trifling ways.

Who threatens to leave but never actually does? I know in my heart that Janie has no problem turning her back on Nick when she feels enough is enough and Nick, who believes he will get over her and look back on her as a fond memory -- has a hard time getting over her. So, yeah, Nick can’t find himself leaving if he says he’s done with all the “crazy shit.”

Who actually keeps their word and leaves? Janie!!

Who trashes the house? An argument can lead to Janie trying to get physical with Nick, him restraining her, her fighting back - things fall and get broken along the way. Chowder is barking and also ready to whoop Nick’s ass.

Do either of them get physical? ^^ Nick would NEVER hit Janie unless he thought she was going to try to kill him forreal. Then he has to knock her out.

How often do they argue/disagree? Nowadays? Their relationship is fucked up so they argue more often than not. Like, “Nick get off my property.” “Nick don’t post my picture on Instagram.” It’s been a long time since they’ve been civil with each other.

Who is the first to apologize? Nick!!!!! He’s out here like Usher releasing his woe in confessions, or Jay Z apologizing in 4:44.

Sex:

Who is on top? Varies, but usually Janie.

Who is on the bottom? Varrieesss.

Who has the strangest desires? Janie be on that freak shit.

Any kinks? So, Janie’s into safe knife play and rope play. Nick was cool with rope play, handcuffs, but then Janie whipped out the knife and he was like 😲

Who’s dominant in bed? You know powerplay is probably a big thing with these two.

Is head ever in the equation? I honestly feel like Janie isn’t into giving head, like regardless of if she loves her partner or not. I can just envision her pissed at Nick over something petty and she’s like, “my tooth hurts.”/“I’m trying to sleep, leave me alone.”

If so, who is better at performing it? Nick. He felt like giving Janie good head could put him on her good side.

Ever had sex in public? Yes, it leads to some AU babies.

Who moans the most? Janie.

Who leaves the most marks? Janie.

Who screams the loudest? I mean Nicky’s the one getting sliced.

Who is the more experienced of the two? I feel like the two have them have gained a lot of experience from being each others firsts in a lot of ways. They explored kinks together and what not.

Do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’? Fuck.

Rough or soft? Rough as hell.

How long do they usually last? It ends when Janie’s sadistic ass says it ends. 💅🏾

Is protection used? Sometimes. Typically. If they were to fuck now, I can imagine Janie telling Nick that she doesn’t know where he’s been so he needs a condom.

Does it ever get boring? Nope!

Where is the strangest place they’d have sex? Strange by JANIE’S standards would be when she slept with Nick at the house he and Jerrold were sharing at the time. Jerrold was gone, of course, but Janie was still trying her hardest to conceal her sneer.

Family:

Do your muses plan on having children/or have children? In a better AU, Janie’s twins were the result of a PRISON VISIT. Nick always wanted to have a family with her, though. If so, how many children do your muses want/have? In main, Janie and Nick have Simone who tells Janie that she’s NOT her mother. In a better AU, Janie and Nick have Leticia and Levi. Nick has brought up the potential of them having a third kid but, I don’t know. Janie has strong reservations with Nick’s record of legal troubles. Who is the favorite parent? Both Nick and Janie are loved well by their kids. Though, granted, Simone loves her dad more on default. Who is the authoritative parent? Both - but in different ways. Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? Nick! Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isn’t around? Also Nick.

Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support their children? I can imagine it can be difficult for Janie due to work purposes, and Nick has missed out on a few things due to his prison stint when the twins were 7 years old. There are fill-ins though, like Louis will pop up. Jerrold too because he views these kids as his niece and nephew!! There’s also Sal and Delores of course.

Who goes to parent teacher interviews? Janie has had to go to some alone when Nick was i n c a r c e r a t e d. 😔

Who changes the diapers? Both, because Cassandra specifically told Nick: “how the fuck do you not know how to change a diaper?”

Who gets up in the middle of the night to feed the baby? Both, but mostly Nick since Janie is getting ready for work by 4 AM.

Who spends the most time with the children? Nick...because he would have tea parties with Leticia or take her on her annual Friday shopping spree at Toys R Us. Plus, he’s bound to go see the latest superhero movie with Levi, if not play video games with him. He gets really engaged in doing whatever the kids wanna do, and he will be offended if he’s disrupted by it. I mean really, Sal can say: “the warehouse is on fire!” and Nick replies, “I’m paintin’ baby girl’s finger nails!!” Who packs their lunch boxes? Janie. Who gives their children ‘the talk’? I feel like Janie would jump on it, because she has to tell Leticia to cut their hands off if things are no longer consensual. Who cleans up after the kids? Janie...has spent some time doing that. Nick isn’t as prompt as he should be. Who worries the most? Nick gets paranoid sometimes. He tends to be paranoid with a lot of things. Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from? From............someone in the family. (Cassandra/Cassandra’s kids)

Affection:

Who likes to cuddle? That’s pretty much Nicky.

Who is the little spoon? 😌 Janie because she lowkey likes to feel safe.

Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? Nick tends to initiate this shit lmao

Who struggles to keep their hands to themself? Nick.

How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? You mean how long can they cuddle until someone has to go to work or someone calls or he tries to initiate sex.

Who gives the most kisses? Nick.

What is their favorite non-sexual activity? Going out to eat Italian Food.

Where is their favorite place to cuddle? The bed!

Who is more likely to playfully grope the other? Nick, though I feel like this question is dangerous.

How often do they get time to themselves? You know in main she ain’t trying to be around him!! But even aside from that I feel like they find the right space and time to be together.

Sleeping:

Who snores? Nicky!

If both do, who snores the loudest? ^^

Do they share a bed or sleep separately? This is verse dependent. Cause they are not at a living together stage yet in main.

If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? Dependent. Who talks in their sleep? Neither.

What do they wear to bed? Night clothes. Pajamas. What else? 😤 Are either of your muses insomniacs? Nick can be sleep deprived sometimes, but not a insomniac.

Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? I’mma say nah. Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? Varies! Who wakes up with bed hair? Nick’s been bald for some time now and, I’m certain Janie wears a bonnet. Who wakes up first? Janie at 4 AM! Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? Nick would. 😍😭 What is their favorite sleeping position? Nick likes to lay on his back with Janie slightly on his chest. Who hogs the sheets? Janie. Do they set an alarm each night? Yes, Janie has a alarm set for work. Can a television be found in their bedroom? Yes. Who has nightmares? Both. Who has ridiculous dreams? Nick. Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? Nick is guilty of this. Who makes the bed? Janie - because even though she leaves first, Nick isn’t the best at getting the sheets together. What time is bed time? Janie has a more set bedtime than Nick does. Because the night, for Nick, can mean he has some serious work to do. Any routines/rituals before bed? Janie does what she has to do, while Nick kind of just flops in bed.

Who’s the grumpiest when they wake up? BOTH.

Work:

Who is the busiest? I feel like they’re both quite busy. Janie at the news station while Nick is (at certain point in times) a nightclub manager. These are equally demanding occupations. Who rakes in the highest income? I’d say Nicky. Especially since he got that $cozzari money. Are any of your muses unemployed? Nope. Who takes the most sick days? Nick. Who is more likely to turn up late to work? Nick. Who sucks up to their boss? Nick is his own boss soooooooooooooooooo probably Janie. What are their jobs? Janie is a reporter who also moonlights as a serial killer, Nick is a nightclub manager who is also a high-ranking gangster. Together they’re quite the pair! Who stresses the most? Nick, he’s always obsessing with thinking three steps ahead of everyone else. Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? Yes. Are your muses financially stable? Yup!

Home:

Who does the washing? Both. Especially when it comes to getting blood out of their outfits as soon as possible-

Who takes out the trash? Nick.

Who does the ironing? Both, Nick a little more.

Who does the cooking? Nick REALLY likes to go out to eat.

Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? Nick, especially if he gets distracted by the kids, sports, or an invasive Jerrold.

Who is messier? Nick.

Who leaves the toilet roll empty? Nick.

Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? ...Nick.

Who forgets to flush the toilet? Neither, Nick has been scolded by his mother -and sisters- for forgetting to put the toilet seat down all his life.

Who is the prankster around the house? Those darn twins!!

Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? Neither, they’re very prompt when they have to get out or get the fuck out.

Who mows the lawn? Nick - or Levi.

Who answers the telephone? Both, but Nick is more inclined to.

Who does the vacuuming? Both, but catch Nick doing it when he’s trashed the house too much while Janie is away and its important that he speed cleans.

Who does the groceries? Janie.

Who takes the longest to shower? Janie.

Who spends the most time in the bathroom? Janie x3!

Miscellaneous:

Is money a problem? Not one bit.

How many cars do they own? Janie has hers, Nick has his - so two.

Do they own their home or do they rent? Own.

Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside? Neither.

Do they live in the city or in the country? New York City Baby 😜

Do they enjoy their surroundings? Nick can’t imagine being nowhere else, personally. Yet even with that said, I can imagine that Janie hates half of the population. She’ll find some reason to hate. Some way.

What’s their song? Nick’s so in love with Janie that it isn’t uncommon for him to hear a song on the radio and think about her. I mean, this is a man who made her so many mixtapes in high school. At the moment, Nick lays in bed and thinks of Common’s song “Faithful.” He’s also stared out the window while Jaheim’s, “Find My Way Back” plays. 😔 The main song that made him realize he was in love with her was, “All I Do Is Think Of You” by The Jackson 5 and it still rings true to this day smh

What do they do when they’re away from each other? Work and kill. Kill and work. Janie also bonds with Chowder while Nick bonds with Louis and Jerrold, who are not nearly as wonderful as Chowder!

Where did they first meet? HIGH SCHOOL, English Class!

How did they first meet? They had some boring classroom introductions on day one but Nick didn’t pay her much of any attention. Afterwards, He heard the name Janie said by the teacher, but he thought that the teacher was mispronouncing the name of another girl, Janet. Later, when Janie rose in the class to read something he would realize that she was, in fact, not Janet. Later on they would have their first actual conversation when Nick asked to copy her homework. He had to work a little charm on her too. 😏 because she was like :| “No.”

Who spends the most money when out shopping? Janie. Nick isn’t much of a materialistic man. This was a guy who wore bootleg Bart Simpson shirts when he was a kid.

Who’s more likely to flash their assets? Janie.

Who finds it amusing when the other trips over? Janie because she’s evil inside.

Any mental issues? To the roof. Who’s terrified of bugs? Janie!! Who kills the spiders around the house? Nick has to! Their favorite place? Spaghetti Warehouse because that’s where they had their first date back in the day. Also, there’s specific areas in Florida they love. Who pays the bills? When they’re living separately they pay their own shit. When they live together, Nick has no issue making sure Janie never spends any of her hard earned money. Do they have any fears for their future? Janie may fear going to jail for her murders when she has her kids rgbmvfg Nick doesn’t fear a damn thing. He has a tattoo that says NEVER SCARED because he’s been through so much. Who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? Nick all the way! Who uses up all of the hot water? Janie. Who’s the tallest? Nick at 6′0. He’s even taller than his dad! Who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other? Nick, but he second thinks that a lot. Who wanders around in their underwear? Nick. Who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? jkhnk Nick, especially when those oldies come on. What do they tease each other about? I don’t think Janie necessarily teases, I think she complains about certain things like Nick’s music tastes, his grumpiness with the youth, all that. Who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times? I think Janie would get so tired of seeing him in that same damn leather jacket. Do they have mutual friends? Chowder is their mutual friend. :) No one else. Who crushed first? I feel like Janie had a crush on Nick that she effortlessly brushed off because he would always do something dumb to ruin it. Like flirt with some other girl in their class and that reminded her men ain’t shit. Any alcohol or substance related problems? No. Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? Nick. Catch him drunk calling her like, “i’m just sayin’ you could do better........” or, “I NEED TO APOLOGIZE”

Who swears the most? Nick doesn’t swear as furiously as Cassandra, but I feel that he does more than Janie all the same.

#tcpimpabutterfly #tcpimpabutterfly : janie.#rel : nick & janie.#answers : nick.

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thirsty-x1 · 4 years

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Make My Day | Lee Hangyul

Request(s):

Hi~ Thank you for your hard work. Can i request 'Your birthday with Hangyul' or vice versa. Have a nice day/week and take care of yourself 💕💕💕😊

Hi again~ Can I request a scenario of Hangyul and you playing with kids. I need more fluff, please and thank you. Take care~ 💕💕😊

↬ Pairing: Hangyul x gn!reader. Lowkey grown ups au?

↬ Genre: Fluff.

↬ Warnings: none.

↬ Word Count: 1.5k

The night breeze was nice as you walked home, Hangyul apologizing for not being able to pick you up after an emergency took place suddenly. You understood, the shared apartment wasn’t very far anyway and it was a rather safe zone, besides you appreciated the alone time it gave you. It had been three years since you two were together now, and you couldn’t help but to laugh thinking back on all the things both of you had gone through. Supporting each other in your hardships, fights and discussions that would always end up with both apologizing and hugging each other shortly after, getting to know each other’s secrets… It wasn’t an easy ride, but it was worth it. Now everything was finally settling down, both getting used to the way the other reacted and managed certain situations, trying to talk things out instead of bottling them up, complementing each other in order to make something better. Hard work paid well.

You went upstairs until reaching to your floor, a sigh coming out of your lips while unlocking the door, flinching when you heard a loud pop followed by multiple cheers.

“Happy birthday!”

There was so many people in the small apartment that you could barely see the furniture. Your friends came up to hug you and congratulate you, followed by the ten boys you would recognize anywhere, and finally your boyfriend, with a playful smile dancing on his lips before pressing them against yours.

“Was this your so called emergency?”

“Maybe.” You chuckled at his reply, getting inside and greeting everyone, looking around you to appreciate the decorations that painted the whole place.

Hangyul loved celebrating birthdays. He enjoyed parties in general, but there was something special in the way his face lighted up whenever he got to hold the cake so that someone would blow the candles, or when he put up the ornaments, even inviting people to come over and planning different games to spend the time. It was adorable to see his child-like enthusiasm when surrounded in that atmosphere, always trying to make everyone happy. He was always good to the rest of the boys, trying to get closer since the beginning. Sometimes you wondered if the reason behind him acting like that was to hide his naturally intimidated expression…

“Y/n, won’t you play with us?” Dohyon’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts, redirecting your attention to the cards that were set on the table.

“Ah, of course, I have won against Hangyul multiple times.”

“You are attacking me ignoring the fact I prepared this magnificent celebration? I will never forgive you.” You laughed at him before placing a small peck on his lips. “I take that last part back.”

Everything seemed to be in slow motion: Dongpyo complaining when you pulled a +4 on him, Eunsang sighing frustrated whenever Hangyul made him skip a turn, Seungyoun screaming as he won the first round easily, Yohan stepping up to protect a pouty Hyeongjun from losing, Junho quietly winning the second round with Minhee staring at him in shock (“how are you so good at it?”), a shy Seungwoo writing his name with his butt as a punishment for being the worst at the game, the idea being suggested by Wooseok as Dohyon tried to deal with the second hand embarrassment through loud squeaks. It was definitely a beautiful scenario, but it still felt like there was something missing…

The rest of the night proceeded like that, with high pitched laughs, karaoke and dancing competitions and a few drunk members, the noise going down a bit before receiving a complaint from the next apartment, the younger ones letting out drowsy giggles. Your friends left first, followed by Seungwoo and Wooseok saying that the kids needed to get proper rest, including a blabbering Seungyoun that was about to chug another glass of alcohol before Hangyul stopped him, cringing at the sudden outburst of aegyo from the older.

“Did you have a good time?” His voice sounded a little bit hoarse while making the question, doing the dishes as you picked up the leftovers from the party.

“I had the best time.” Right after putting everything in the trash can, you hugged him from behind, smiling as he laughed breathily. “Thanks for another amazing birthday.”

He finished, turning around to embrace you, saying nothing but rather trying to study your expression.

“There is something you are not telling me.”

It was impossible to try and hide your smile. “Actually, I want to go somewhere tomorrow…”

As you looked in the box a thousand times, you couldn’t help but to get nervous. Hangyul would laugh at you and brush it off, but what if he didn’t like the gift? What if it was too much or even worse, not enough? The three of you met a year ago, but maybe it was too soon…

“It’s going to be alright, he will love it, really.”

“Okay yes, that’s nice, but what if he doesn’t?”

“Then we apologize, simple as that.” He always had an answer ready and that was annoying, mostly because he was right. “Now get out of the car, I’m sure he’s waiting.”

You felt your heart beating faster with each step you gave, the ominous door that usually made you feel warm was now standing firm and causing chills to run up and down your spine. The second it opened, you froze in place, melting immediately as you saw his face, having him run towards you before feeling the impact of his hug.

“I thought you weren’t going to come! Took you long enough.” His words were like arrows, making you feel guilty for doubting so much. “Happy birthday!”

“Happy birthday to you too, little one.”

“Is that for me?” His curious eyes lingered on the box you were holding before smiling mischievously, almost grabbing it before Hangyul snatched it and held it high.

“For later, first we have to eat the cake.”

“Cake?! I love my birthday.”

The three of you got inside, you paid attention to the kid blabbering right beside you while Hangyul stayed back to talk a little with the woman that was in charge of everything. The little steps and jumps that the kid gave while talking to you made you smile, feeling more at ease as you saw his sparkly eyes while telling you what he did today, the surprise that the rest of the kids had prepared for him, how despite enjoying it he was dreading to spend his birthday with you two and especially you, because he liked the fact that both got to share that special day (“it feels like we were destined to meet, doesn’t it?”).

“That’s settled, then.” Hangyul announced as he got in the room, expression changing when you shoot him a glare. “The cake. The cake is settled.”

“Yeah, duh, we had to prepare it because you wouldn’t come.” The mocking tone that the boy used made you feel a little bit proud, patting his back as if saying he did a good job.

Hangyul close the door, cautiously checking that any of the other kids weren’t around and finally sat on the table beside the birthday boy, fixing the two numbered candles while muttering how he definitely was the birthday expert and not you two. Both started to sing the traditional song, giggling when he got shy before he blew out the candles.

“You are eleven now, what’s your take on this?” Your question seemed to put him deep in thought as Hangyul cut the cake.

“It’s pretty good… I haven’t received any letter confirming I’m a wizard but there’s time.”

He was always like this, joking around, smiling and even acting a little bit sassy on everyone around him, but both of you knew he had an amazingly kind heart, acting older than his age often but none of you ever told him that. In a certain way, he reminded you of Hangyul, some other times you saw yourself in his attitude… maybe that was what had pushed you to make the final decision.

“Ah! I have a gift for you, wait a second.” He disappeared in a flash and coming back with what looked like some bracelets. “I made them! There’s one for Hangyul too.” You thanked him and felt a knot in your throat as you saw that the little beads spelled his name next to yours, doing the same with Hangyul’s. “I didn’t know what to prepare… But I wanted to give you something since we got closer during this past year.”

Since you couldn’t talk, Hangyul did. “Actually, we have a gift for you too.”

He put the box on the table, both of you staring anxiously to the boy’s expression as he opened it, your tears spilling involuntarily as he read the papers over and over again, looking at you and then back at Hangyul before simply covering his face. You hugged him, holding him closer when you felt his breathing shaking. After a while, he calmed down, trying to pull himself together, letting out a choked laugh.

“Not the letter I was expecting but still it’s so much better… I don’t know if I’ll get used to call you 'my parents’ and all that, though.”

Hangyul nodded and started giving life lessons as if nothing, the little boy rolling his eyes at it, and you could only stare, trying to burn this moment into your memory as the start of a new family.

This one sucks a whole ass lot, like I pictured it so nicely in my head but it doesn’t reach that image at all... Maybe I’ll edit it in the future so that it’s at least a little bit better but... sigh... I don’t know why I chose a boy either?

Anyways, I stan the idea of Hangyul adopting a kid that’s not so kid because he knows how fucking hard it is to go through it, especially for the more grown ones and now I’m crying, bye.

~Nani

| Masterlist |

#not the daddy we were waiting for but the one we need #lee hangyul #hangyul #lee hangyul scenario #lee hangyul fluff #lee hangyul imagine #hangyul scenario #hangyul fluff #hangyul imagine #x1 #x1 scenario #x1 fluff #x1 imagine #x1 hangyul #x1 lee hangyul #mbk #im

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toxicxxmyth · 5 years

Text

The Truth Untold; Sebastian Stan

Sebastian Stan

Summary: Y/n Y/l/n, born and raised in south side Chicago. Now raising her five younger siblings, she’s not even sure if some of them are actually related to her. But she takes care of them nonetheless, as best as she can. While her drunk father continues to make their life harder. And her drug addicted mother comes bursting through the door once every to years. Its a chaotic life for a 23 year old, but she made it work. Until one day, the most notorious mob leaders of the country shows up to do some business in the south side.

Au: Shameless!Au, Mafia!Sebastian

Warning(s): Cussing, slight smut, poverty, drugs etc

Word Count: 3,047

A/N: This is literally a Shameless fanfic, if you’ve seen the show, AMAZING, if not than you should because its amazing.

A/N 2: Plus this lowkey kinda sucks lol, so watching the show will make up for it.

A/N 3: I didn’t write the whole smut cause i suck at it, but i’ll try my best if you guys ask for it.

prima întâlnire

The whole club glowed with blue and green laser beams shooting out from the rotating lights on the ceiling. Smoke coming out of both ends of the dance floor, the bar area seemed to be the only calm part of the club. It was Friday night and the club was beyond packed with people dancing dirty in the middle of the club. The air was thick, a mixture of the fog machine and marihuana clouds. Making it slightly hard to breathe. Everyone seemed to be having a good time.

Except you, apparently. Stress radiated off you as you sat, tensed at the bar. Watching as the bartender scrambled back and forth to take orders from everyone who crowded the bar. You couldn’t possibly have fun when your father arrived after months of his little rendezvous of drugs and alcohol. Causing even more chaos in your home.

“Y/n, I’m going to need you to get off your ass and start having some fun” Camille stutters over to you, making you lose your train of thoughts.

“Nah, I think I’ll head home for the night” You shrugged, grabbing your purse and downing your drink.

“What!? The whole point of taking you to the club was for you to loosen up, Y/n/n” She whines, bringing her hands up to rub your bare and tensed shoulders, a pout adorning her red lips. Making you shake your head with a slight smile at the drunken state of your best friend.

“I have to get back to the kids. It’s kind of hard to have fun when all I can think about is Ethan blowing up the kitchen” You sigh, wincing at the thought of your little brother destroying your kitchen for one of his stupid experiments.

“Fine, I’ll take you. It’s no fun without you” She huffs while turning around dramatically. Causing a giggle to rip from your throat. “Don’t move, I’m getting my stuff”

“You don’t have to though, I can just take the bus. You should stay and have fun with your coworkers” You reassured her as she raised an eyebrow at you.

“At 1:34am, Y/n, I think the fuck not” She gave you a look as if warning you to stay put.

Your lip caught between your teeth as you watch your best friends stumble across the club, a smile on your lip as you thought how lucky you were to have such an amazing friend like her. Grabbing your purse to take a few dollars out to pay for your drink, your felt lips against the shell of your ear, and with a husky voice, he spoke.

“I can feel your stress all the way across the room”

You turned around quickly, eyebrows raised ready to tell the guy off, only to stop and gasp loudly. Your eyes wide and mouth agape, lucky for you, the music was booming loud so the chance of him hearing your deep gasp was slim to none.

He’s beautiful, to say the least. The lights didn’t seem to bother you anymore as you analyzed every feature on the man. He had deep blue eyes, ones you could easily lose yourself into. Prominent cheekbones, his facial hair was growing out, causing your thoughts to wonder off to inappropriate scenarios. His lips where a light shade of pink, looking delicious as ever. He was older, maybe in his thirties, but you couldn’t tell. His whole body covered in black designer, he was expensive.

“Um, I-” You stuttered, brows furrowed in confusion, you’ve never seen this man in your life.

“What is it? Cat caught your tongue” He smirked, bringing his glass full of scotch to his lips. Cocky motherfucker.

You scoffed at his attitude, biting your bottom lip to surpass a smile. You didn’t know if you wanted to punch him or ride his dick into the sunset.

“And who the hell are you? My stalker?” You asked, raising an eyebrow as you gained your composer as you got a clue on what type of guy you may be dealing with.

“No, no stalker here. I couldn’t help but notice your lack of interest of for being here tonight” He smiles kindly, catching you off guard.

“Yeah, well clubs aren’t really my thing, feel like I have better things to do” You nod your head, turning away from him, looking at one of the bottles that was placed on the wall along the others as if it was the most interesting thing there. Anything to look away from the beautiful stranger.

“Yeah? Like what?” He asked, downing his drink while calling over the bartender to order a new one, you assumed.

“Finding a job without having to blow the manager” You simply stated. Causing him to chuckle. His smile was absolutely breathtaking.

“What’s you name” He asked, which felt more of a statement, actually.

“Uh Y/n. Yours?” You looked up at him, only to be met face to face with his beautiful eyes.

“Sebastian”

Sebastian, even his name is attractive.

“So what brings you to south side Chicago?” You asked. Interested in why such a wealthy looking man would end up in this dump.

“Business.” He shrugged, voice lowering as he said it. Eyebrows raised at you as if warning you not to ask anymore, which exactly what you did. You wouldn’t show it, but his demanding tone scared the shit out of you, but weirdly enough, it turned you the fuck on.

“Let me buy you a drink” He offers.

“I can’t, I uh have to get back to my kids” You shake your head and getting up from the stool. Ready for his surprised face a stuttering words at the mention of five kids. But to your surprise, he was unfazed.

“Kids?” He asked, pulling out his wallet, taking out big cash as he dumped it on the counter for the barista to take. Making your eyes wind just a bit.

“They’re actually my siblings, but they’re still kind of my kids” You confirmed while nodding your head. His eyes ranking your body, you felt small under his gaze, making you feel insecure.

“Let me guess” He began, clearing his throat as he ripped his gaze away from yours.

“First born, OD’d mom, alcoholic father. Leaving you to raise your siblings, you had to grow up at a young age, at maybe” He stops and raises his hands in defense “and this is just a guess, 13, maybe? Didn’t finish high school cause of your deadbeat parents and you’re currently jobless, stealing and scamming for food and clothes in the meantime” He finishes while looking at you with a small smile.

You couldn’t help but scoff in disbelief. Wondering if you should be offended by the assumption or impress by how spot on he was.

“Mom didn’t OD though, haven’t seen her in years. But I do know that she’s out living her best life. And I was actually 6 when I realized my parents didn’t give a shit. Ended up raising my two brothers. Then came the rest” You sigh, somewhat sadly at the situation you were in at such a young age, but you loved your siblings nonetheless.

“Must’ve been tough” He gave you a sad smile, taking a sip out of his drink.

“Yeah, but I got used to it pretty quick”

“Well it seems like you know everything about me, so why don’t you tell me about yourself. I bet it’s much more interesting than my shitty life” You chuckled, hoping to get some kind of information about what kind of business he was running here.

“It’s really crawdad in here, let’s go outside” He moved his head to point at the door.

“No” You simply stated. Earning a look of shocked and surprised from the dominant male. Which boosted your ego just a little.

“This is how things work. I walk out with you, you tell me your oh so tragic childhood which causes me to pity you. Soon, once I’m under your spell, you chloroform me and a white van appears out of nowhere and I’ll be part of a illegal sex and drug trafficking ring” You smiled innocently at him.

“I’d actually be much more creative in kidnapping people”

You didn’t know if he was being funny or serious, but it made you feel a mixture of fear and desire.

“I’m from Romania, actually. Born and raised, came to America when I was 16, pretty hard to adapt to a new life. But I managed it” He offers a smile before continuing. “Dad took off with some young blondie, claiming he was in love with her” He used his fingers to quote on “in love”, “And mom got sick, and with dad gone, I couldn’t take care of her properly. So I dropped out of high school and got a job, one that paid extremely well. And I became good at it, really good, actually. So that’s me. A Businessman taking care of his family” He smiled at you, playing with the drink he had, one that you didn’t notice before.

“Is your mother okay now” You asked, your ears on full display for him.

“Yeah, she’s fine now”

You nodded your head in understatement, but a question kept bugging you, so you asked hesitantly .

“And your dad?” And just like that, his whole body tensed up, eyes darkening at the mention of him. Mentally cursing yourself for being so damn nosy.

“I’m so-”

“No, its fine. He’s out of the picture, for good. Has been for years” He had a sinister look in his eyes, which caused an uneasy feeling to burst in your stomach.

“I can take you home” He smiles, kindly, this time.

This caused you to furrow your eyes in confusion, until you realized that you claimed to leave and go home when he first arrived.

“I’m not going to hop in a strangers car and ditch my drunk best friend” You smirked, yet your hand didn’t dare move out of his grasp. And he noticed two due to the smirked that was placed on his lips. Before you knew it, you were pulled into his arms, making you gasp and pull away quickly. It felt incredibly nice feeling his lean fit body against yours, but pulling always was basic reflex.

“Feisty” He chuckle, tongue swiping across his lips as his ring covered fingers traced your features. The whole mood went from a pity party to testing both your sexual desires. The softness of it all made you lean in while closing my eyes. It’s been a hell of a while since you’ve been touched, even slightly, especially by such an attractive man.

“And you’re incredibly cocky”

“I am, aren’t I?” He laughed, and actual laugh. Which left you slightly confused.

---

Before you fucking knew it, your back was being pressed against the dirty walls of the most disgusting public bathroom you’ve probably ever been in while your neck was being devoured by a stranger you met 20 minutes ago. Your hands were firmly pressed against his chest, head tilted to the side giving him as much access to your neck as he needed.

“Fuck, Sebastian” You couldn’t help but moan as you felt his growing dick press against your underwear. Your dress pulled up to your waist, making you feel like a cheap whore. But the feeling of Sebastian’s lips sucking roughly on your collarbone, his beard scratching against you and his growing dick rubbing against your slick underwear made you forget about your pride.

His hands found their way to your exposed ass, squeezing them as hard as he could. His nails and cold rings digging into your skin made push your body harder against his. Your breathing was erratic, your hands couldn’t seem to find a place to rest upon. So you ran your fingers through his hair, tugging at it so you could look him in the eye, which were now a dark blue. Pupils slightly dilated, lips bruised and painted by your pink lipstick. The sight alone could’ve made you come undone.

Sebastian had other plans, while you were admiring his features, his hand pass your underwear, pressing harshly against your clit. You gasp loudly as you hold onto the back of his neck for some sort of support.

Dragging his fingers down your slit, he collected some of your wetness and brought it back up to your clit, so it be easier to play with you. All while biting the shell of your ear.

“So wet, so delicious” He praised while slamming his lips on yours. The kiss was sloppy, but none of you minded it much.

His touch were soft, yet he had you rolling your eyes back as he rubbed you clit in circles.

You were so caught up in your own bubble of pleasure, you didn’t notice him using your thigh to rub his closed dick on. And smirked formed on your lips as your hand reached down to roughly palm him. But before you could do anything else. He grabbed your hand and turned you over the sink. Taking your hair into a makeshift pony tail, forcing you to look at yourself in the mirror, all while grinding his dick on your bare ass.

“I promise, next time, I’ll fuck you somewhere less disgusting, and more expensive, but for now, you’ll have to deal with this” He growls against your cheek.

Next time...

Staring at the blank walls of your room at 6:50 became some sort of tradition. Sleep was nowhere to be found as your thoughts kept you up every night. But lately, the only thought on your mind was Sebastian, and his beautiful blue eyes, his ring covered finger and his delicious lips. Fucking asshole.

It’s been exactly a week since you your encounter, and to be honest, you were devastated, especially after he gave you the best fucking orgasm you’ve ever experience in a smelly bathroom than any guy in your bed.

Sighing for the 20th time, you decide to get up from your pity party and head downstairs for a glass of water. A sleeping pill would be great if you didn’t have five kids to look after and figuring way to get. You only had 10 minutes before waking everyone up and cooking breakfast. And preparing their lunches for school. A headache already forming at just the thought of it, but you knew it was just lack of sleep.

Half way down the stairs, you heard a loud knock on your door, causing you to stop and furrow your eyebrows in confusion.

“Who the hell could that be?” You thought out loud as you reached the end of the stairs, grabbing the robe that was left on the couch and wrapping it over your semi naked body.

“Delivery for Y/n Y/l/n” Was the first thing that came out of the man’s mouth as you opened the door half way.

“Delivery? What do you mean delivery, from who?” you asked, opening the door wider and wrapping your arms around your freezing body. Today was Sunday, there are no deliveries on Sundays. Though, the fact that today wasn’t supposed to be mail day, it was the least your worries. What worried you most was the man delivering it. He was dressed in all black, hair slicked back and tattoos adorning his face. A cigarette handing from behind his ear, though it wasn’t enough to surprise or worry you.

“Delivery from Mr. Stan” He coughs nervously, as if saying the name will cause a curse for all eternity.

Confused, you take the heavy box into your arms.

“Who-“

“Have a good day, ma’am” He smiles and walks away, leaving you confused, and slightly scared of what might be in the mysterious box that looked to be more expensive than your whole house.

“Ma’am? Who the hell are you trying to fool here” You questioned, mostly to yourself as you shut the door close.

“What’s that?” Came the voice of the second oldest, Jeremy, as he slouched on the couch, lighting up a cigarette as he did so. Causing you to groan in annoyance while ripping it out of his mouth.

“I have no fucking clue. Go make yourself useful make breakfast.”

“Like what?” He groans, not really paining attention to you.

Like cereal” You ordered as soon as you heard the alarm from one of the room upstairs, knowing everyone will be down soon.

“There’s no milk”

“Then use water”

Once upstairs, you closed the door, locking it before throwing yourself on the bed with the box in your lap. Pretty stupid of you to accept a box from a drug dealing looking kid, but here you were. Half way opened, you noticed a card sticking out from the side. And saw a neat handwriting, one that you could’ve sworn you’ve seen before.

“No legacy is as rich as honesty”

I know you’ll probably think I’m an asshole for this. But here’s a little something for you to get by. I’ve been in the same situation, though, I took a dangerous root. So in the meantime, here’s a gift to help you and and your family. Don’t make a fuss, and burn, just enjoy it. And I’ll see you soon”

Sebastian.

Beyond confused, you opened the box only to find a shit load of money stacked on top of another. Maybe, 9, 10 grand? You didn’t know, but you panicked. Your eyes wide in shock, your hand covering you mouth as, your hand covering you mouth as our mind tried to process what was happening.

“What the fuck, did you rob a bank or something?” Jeremy gasped as he busted into the room, staring at the money. You crumbled the note and placed it in between your legs so Jeremy didn’t notice. Once you were calm enough, you took a deep breath and closed the box calmly

“Count the money. We’re giving it back”

“Who the hell did you get involved with, Y/n?” Jeremy asked, sternly, this time. He closed the door and grabbed the box, making sure the other didn’t hear or see.

“I have no fucking clue, but that money is not staying”

#sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan headcanon #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan fanfiction #sebastian stan imagines #bucky imagine #bucky x reader #sebastian stan au #sebastian stan #sebastian stan smut #bucky barnes #avengers imagine #marvel imagine

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heyyyharry · 5 years

Text

My Girl Series: Chapter 9 - Bambi

…in which the little girl next door isn’t so little anymore.

Series description: Y/N falls in love with the older boy next door who doesn’t feel the same, years later they meet again at a funeral.

AU: actor!harry, older!harry, younger!y/n; (4-year age gap)

Chapter 8: Without The Love - Harry wants what he shouldn’t, and now he cannot leave.

Warning: smut (yes guys, finally), and also mistakes because my eyesight got blurry after going through 7k words lmao.

wattpad link

"But boys don't like little girls."

"That's not true. I'm a boy and I like you."

"You do?!"

"Of course I do. You're my girl."

With a faint smile, fifteen-year-old Harry headed back to his front porch. He thought about the look on Y/N's face when he called her his girl, oh how happy she must've felt, and that made him feel special too. As the boy sat back down with his study group, his eyes still followed the girl until she was finally out of sight.

"Are you dating an eleven-year-old?" The fat kid named Brian said, pulling Harry's attention back to the skeptical stares everyone in the circle was giving him. They all cracked up at that one question, causing the poor boy to shift uncomfortably in his spot.

"She's just my neighbor," he said, but nobody seemed convinced.

"I think she has a crush on you," said the pretty blonde sitting right in front of him. When she pressed her lips into a smile, Harry swore that his heart might've just skipped a beat.

Her name was Kathy — the most beautiful girl in school. Earlier that year, there had been rumors going around that she secretly liked Harry a lot, but she hadn't found the courage to ask him out yet. And frankly, who wouldn't want to receive attention from such a beautiful girl? So when she assumed that his little friend might have a crush on him, he couldn't let her believe that was true, not even for a second.

"I think she only sees me as her big brother," he reassured Kathy.

Another smile formed on her lips as she combed her fingers through her golden locks.

"Trust me, I know when a girl likes a boy," she said, batting her eyelashes at Harry, who could only hope it wasn't obvious how red he had become.

"Dude," another kid spoke up, gaining everyone's attention at once, but he was only talking to Harry. "That kid was so excited to tell you about her first period. Talk about being obsessive! I can see her hanging your photos everywhere in her bedroom."

Everyone burst out laughing at what that boy had just said, everyone including his crush. So even though Harry didn't find any humor in the mean joke, he cracked a nervous grin. He felt so guilty afterwards though; if his Bambi had been there and they had said those words to her face, he might've reacted differently. But she wasn't there, Kathy was, leaving him no other choice but to play along.

When Harry looked up and met Kathy's blue eyes, she gave him a shrug as if to tell him to just ignore his friends. But how could he when they were all laughing at him? For a teenage boy, having a good reputation mattered a lot; and without a doubt, having a lot of friends was more important than having a real one. So those simple words the other kids had said caused him to overthink for the rest of the day. And from that day, the way he saw his little neighbor had also changed.

All of a sudden, he felt like it was inappropriate for a fifteen-year-old to spend that much time with an eleven-year-old. First off, people would make fun of him. Second, girls like Kathy would assume he wasn't mature enough for them. It was such a shame that both of those reasons were about him, and not Y/N. He didn't bother to think about how it would make her feel when he decided to keep his distance with her.

At that point, Harry didn't know how much he would regret it later on.

Checking his watch for the third time or so, Harry leaned back against the car, sighing as he looked up. He tried to find the window on the fifth floor that was Y/N's bedroom only to see if her light was on. It showed just how impatient he was getting. Fifteen minutes more and he began to fear that she might've forgotten about their "date" to the musical. So he decided to send a quick text to make sure she remembered. It didn't take more than a second for the word seen to appear and three dots to pop up in the chat box.

⌲ Bambi: The show starts at 9. It's only 7PM now?

Shit. He thought to himself and quickly opened the photo of the tickets she'd sent. She was right. He was too excited to see her that he thought the show started one hour earlier. Embarrassed, Harry quickly wrote her another text.

⌲ Sorry. But I'm here anyway so can I come up?

⌲ Bambi: Wait. I'll be right down with you.

⌲ Bambi: Btw, park your car somewhere. We'll walk.

Y/N suggested that they go for a drink first and then to the theater. He hadn't seen her so excited in a long time, she talked and laughed a lot. It wasn't her everyday personality but he thought he liked that side of her, he liked it a lot.

They walked side by side, two meters apart, him having both hands in his pockets and her with her arms folded to hold onto herself. Those defensive gestures might keep them from running into each other's embrace, yet it didn't stop their thoughts from wandering way too far from reality. He took a glance at her and turned away as she did the same. They had been walking for five minutes without exchanging a single word, and the silence had become way too suffocating.

"Why is this street so dark?" Harry finally spoke as he looked around and realized there was no one else but the two of them. The moon was nowhere to be seen, and the only source of light there was a dim streetlamp which went on and off every second.

Harry had checked the weather forecast before leaving his house and it said there was a 70% chance of rain that night. No wonder the stars in the sky were nonexistent, same as the moon, they were all hidden under thick blankets of dark clouds.

Not answering Harry's question, Y/N walked fast forward, taking a turn into an alley as she nodded her head, giving him signal to hurry along. She told him they couldn't take the direct route to the bar because it would be suicidal to walk down the street together at London's most busy hour. When they went out for dinner with her father and Marcy, they had tried to be as lowkey as they could've, but somehow still ran into his fans. This time, they had to be even more secretive, though it was admittedly tiring to literally hide in the dark.

"Do you always walk that far when you're out with a girl?" Y/N pointed out, making Harry realize he was keeping a considerable distance from her.

"Yeah, well, I don't even hold hands on a date unless it's for PR."

"Sucks to be you." She laughed. But he agreed. It sucked to be him sometimes.

In silence, Harry followed the girl as they walked along the rough cobbled road that caused his feet to ache. The abandoned blocks on both sides were tight together and loomed over the pair, creating an illusion that the alleyway was longer and more narrow than it actually was. The sounds of their footsteps ricochetted from one wall to the other, somehow causing his heart to beat in sync with his steady paces.

In the half light of the alley, his Bambi appeared so small. To answer the question in his head, she broke the silence, "I don't usually take this route when I go out alone at night."

"Good." He breathed out a heavy chuckle, feeling relieved. "I meant to ask."

They carried on walking, taking a few more turns. All those narrow streets looked almost the same, all dark and grey, causing Harry to think if Y/N had left him there to walk back on his own, he would've spent the rest of his life searching for the way out.

"We're almost there," she assured him.

Soon he noticed the yellow beams of the only lamppost ahead, and Y/N sighed in relief as she pointed to the metal door at the end of the road, saying that was the back entrance of the bar. She walked in without hesitation, pulling Harry along, so he assumed she had been there plenty of times before.

The place was hundreds of conversations told in loud voices, all mixed up with the loud rock song blasting on the speaker which nobody really paid attention to. Y/N made her way through the sweaty bodies, making sure her fingers stayed locked around Harry's wrist as they headed straight towards the counter to order some drinks.

"Andrew!"

"Little girl!" The big fat bartender laughed loudly when he spotted her face in the crowd. "I can hardly recognize you when you're sober."

Y/N rolled her eyes as she huffed and pulled a chair to sit down, telling Harry to do the same. It took the actor a moment to figure out why Andrew and everything there looked so familiar. That was the same bar he'd come to pick her up when she was shit-faced on that counter and threw up all over his shoes. He opened his mouth to speak, yet was interrupted by the loud bearded man.

"Glad to see you two back together again," said the man while looking at Harry. "The last time you broke up, she literally turned my bar into her second home."

"But we never dated."

"Don't fool me, little girl." Andrew scoffed, pointing a finger at Y/N. "If your pretty boyfriend hadn't come save your ass, I would've tossed you out on the street that night."

Harry and Y/N exchanged funny looks in silence. Instead of trying to explain, they just let Andrew believe what he wanted to believe and ordered a pint of beer for each.

Most of the people at that bar were blue-collar workers and middle-aged men who'd had too much to drink to remember who they were, let alone recognize movie star Harry Styles sitting just a few feet away from them. For the first time in the longest time, Harry finally felt like he was invisible and he actually loved the feeling of it. It seemed like Y/N was the only one there who knew him, and he felt free to drink as much as he liked and laughed as hard as he wanted. They sat and talked about life, his movies, her job at the library, and many other things that mattered to them. Then it was finally 8:30, they paid for the drinks and said goodbye to Andrew so as to get to the show on time.

Once again, the pair took the same dark route they had before, but this time instead of walking far apart, she had her arm around his waist and his on her shoulders. They were singing random songs out loud, knowing the only creatures they might disturb on that abandoned street were the rats and cockroaches in the sewers. But their ignorance didn't get to last for too long. As they took the final turn to get back to the main street, Harry immediately spotted a familiar face.

Under the lamppost stood a man, tall and slim, with a cigarette between his lips. He was too busy talking on the phone with someone to notice them. So Harry grabbed Y/N by the arms and pulled her back into the dark alleyway. She intended to ask when he pressed her against the wall, but with a finger to his lips, he signaled her to stay silent. Slowly, he poked his head out to check on the stranger, making Y/N frown in confusion.

"That man out there works for an online magazine that write gossip about celebrities," he whispered, now turning back to her, one hand resting on the wall by her head, the other on her neck. "Maybe we should wait a bit for him to leave. Can't let him see us together."

Y/N pressed her lips into a firm line, nodding her head to let him know she got it. She fought him a lot, so it was nice to see her listen to him even just for once. And she looked too cute for him to feel unfortunate that they got stuck in that situation.

For a moment, he got lost in the hues of her eyes. He told himself to stay calm, still couldn't fight the urge to caress her lips with his thumb. He thought about chewing on them if she would just let him kiss her. But knowing her, he didn't have much hope for getting a taste of those lips anytime soon.

Just as a drop of crystal-clear water appeared on his skin, Harry quickly lifted both hands above Y/N's head to shield her from the raindrops coming down. She gave him a smile, as if the thought of a rain excited her as it used to when she was a child. He watched her beam grow, unable to stop one from forming upon his face. However, the drops became heavier really soon. Harry poked his head out of the alleyway once again, but the annoying reporter was still standing there because he was safe with the roof above his head. Harry sighed in frustration, but Y/N only giggled. The sound of her laugh eased his mind as he stepped closer, almost sandwiching her between his body and the brick wall so the rain couldn't drench all of her, at least not as much as it was doing to him.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, their faces so close that even with the sound thunder, he could still hear her breath get caught in her throat. Y/N cupped his face, wiping the wet strands out of his forehead. Her eyelids flutter as she stared at the droplets running down his pink lips.

"Why are you sorry?" She asked, laughing nervously when her body shivered from the cold. Even though it was pointless at this point to shield her from the downpour, Harry still kept one arm above her head, his other tightened the grip on her waist.

"I ruined our date."

"Our date?"

"Oh, fuck...I mean..." He squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head and laughing lowly. "Shit. Never mind."

Y/N said nothing. The girl couldn't come up with anything to speak so she pulled him in. The water ran down their faces to where their lips collided. Neither seemed to care as they tasted the cold drops against the tips of their tongues. Harry pushed his lips in more firmly, and the intoxicating wave running through him caused his head to spin in circles. There was something so heavenly about a kiss in the rain, a tender yet intense moment that just wouldn't wait. The couple melted into each other, letting the water soak through to chill their skin, like a rebellion act against nature.

The universe could bring the storm, but the sunshine within could come through just as strong.

When Harry pulled his car over in front of his house, his first instinct was to look up at the highest window next door to check if Y/N had gone to bed yet. It was almost midnight then but he could still see her shadow pacing back and forth inside her room, and so he assumed she must've waited until the last minute to prepare for an exam again.

"What is it?" Spoke the girl sitting in the passenger seat, as she leaned over to see what her date was looking at, and why he was smiling. Harry just straight off told Kathy that it was nothing, and got out to come open the door for her. His mum was already asleep, so he asked Kathy to be quiet as he took her hand and led her into his house. The teenagers headed straight to the backyard, where they could be alone and didn't have to worry about waking up Anne.

Turning on the fairy lights on the porch, Harry set up two chairs looking out to the garden, and asked his date to sit down with him. But that wasn't what Kathy had in mind. Her attention was on something else. With a smile she pointed to the big tree standing right by the fence, and asked him, "is that your treehouse?"

"Yeah. My dad built it," he answered.

Harry almost included 'before he left', but he didn't think Kathy was ready to hear about his family drama when it was just their first date.

"Let's go up there."

"Go up there?" Harry widened his eyes at her suggestion, yet the girl already seemed so excited.

"Yeah. I wanna see your treehouse." She giggled and leaned in to study his facial expression, probably wondering why he seemed so unsure. "Do you have secrets that you don't want me to know?" Kathy joked, laughing slightly, but Harry only shook his head as a response. "Or am I not special enough?"

"You are, you are special," he said fast, laughing nervously.

Without a doubt, he liked Kathy very much. He would be insane if he didn't, because she was the definition of perfect. She was beautiful, and sweet, and smart, like the main girl in those romantic movies he'd watched and books he'd read. And to have someone popular and pretty like her as a girlfriend was certainly a dream come true. However, nobody else had entered that treehouse but him and Y/N. It wasn't just his treehouse, it was theirs. So even though Y/N was studying in her room and wouldn't be able to see him bring Kathy to their fort, he felt guilty about it still.

"I'm too exhausted to climb all the way up there," he lied. But Kathy just breathed out a laugh and took his wrist as she told him he was just lazy.

"Come on, Harry. Let's go," she urged him, pulling the boy with her before he could come up with another way to say no. And Harry didn't make an effort to stop her then. He let her get on the robe ladder first and followed right after to make sure she didn't fall. When they finally got up there, he switched on the lightbulb and stepped aside for his date to enter the world that was initially just his and Y/N's.

"Wow, 'do not enter'. Trying to be badass, huh?" Kathy giggled as she read the messy handwriting on the door. Little did she know, it wasn't Harry's.

The girl took a look around the tiny space, observing every little corner that belonged to her date's childhood, everything that used to matter a lot, or still mattered to him. It didn't take her too long to spot four simple words carved onto the back entrance.

"Y/N and Harry only?" She squinted her eyes, and turned to give Harry a questioning look. "Is Y/N that little girl who lives next door to you?"

"Yup." He shrugged, shoving both hands into his pants pockets. "This used to be our treehouse."

Used to. Harry couldn't believe he'd said that. If Y/N was there, she would be so upset, and the thought of it made him feel terrible.

"Our?" Kathy playfully stuck out her bottom lip, pouting as she said, "so I'm not the first girl you brought here?"

"She's just a kid." He chuckled, shaking his head, and the smile soon returned to Kathy's face. Slowly, she walked up to him, wrapping her arms around his neck and Harry felt his heart racing faster as his arms finally tightened around her small waist. Their foreheads rested against each other; and he let himself get carried away by the deep blue of her eyes.

"Sit. I have something for you." He sat down on the floor, pulling her down with him and reached out to grab the dusty guitar he'd left in the corner for too long. The last time he picked it up was when his Bambi asked him to play her a song. Of course he didn't mention it to Kathy, so the girl assumed she was the first and only girl he'd ever sung to.

The sad truth was, she wasn't even his first love, or even his love. She was just a girl he had a crush on at seventeen, the age at which not everyone could tell the difference between love and physical attraction. Harry and Kathy had their first kiss that night in the treehouse, but a few months later, they called it off because their feelings just weren't the same anymore. After the breakup, they never spoke to each other again, and it didn't take Harry too long to erase most memories he had with her.

But somehow, he couldn't do the same to the little girl he had abandoned.

The rain came in waves, splattering across the pavement and beating down on every hard surface. Soon the entire city had been hidden by silver sheets of water. As pedestrians dashed for cover, the hiss of car tires on glistening roads was competing with the wild howling of the wind. The scene was pure madness. But right there, in Harry's car, was the opposite of what was happening outside in the pouring rain.

He kissed her and the world fell away. Their heavy breaths had fogged up all the windows, obscuring the movements of two soaked body in the backseat of the steamy vehicle. She was sitting on his lap, grinding against the hard bulge under his wet jeans, earning a heavy groan that got stuck in his throat when he tossed his head back. His fingers pressed hard onto the exposed skin above the waistband of her tennis skirt.

"That man took too long to leave," she moaned into his mouth, hands hiking up his shirt as she was desperate for some skin contact. The thin fabric of her panties didn't really do its job because he could feel her heat burning through all those layers and knew she wasn't just dripping from the rain. It was killing him to not tear off her clothes and take her right there. He desperately wanted to, he knew she wanted him to. His mind tried to reason with him that once they'd had sex, they could never go back. But now she was moaning his name non-stop as he was sucking on her neck, it was impossible for them to stop at this point.

"We can't...not here." His breath hitched up as he clung to her hips, trying to push her away, but she grasped his neck harder, forcing him to open his eyes and look into hers. The look she was giving him could melt him into the puddle that had already formed on the leather seat because of their drenched clothes.

"Want you now," she begged, hot mouth sucking the spot right below his ear, causing him to moan out, and the sound to Y/N was just like a ballad made from heaven.

"Bambi-" She cut him off by kissing his lips. He kissed back, both hands moving to her neck and hair.

"Want you to fuck me," she whispered, pouting like a little girl, but now he knew she wasn't one anymore. "Don't you want that? To fuck me?"

"I do, fuck, I do." Harry loved and hated her dirty mouth at the same time, but he still managed to use a fraction of self-control he'd got left to reason with her, as well as himself.

"Just...don't want our first time to...god...to be like this. Not here." He tossed his head back when she kissed his jawline, neck, and collarbone. "Let's get you home." He shook his head, one arm squeezing her torso, but she only kissed him harder, leaving him breathless. "Baby, be good."

Y/N's lips curved into a smile as she heard that nickname. That was the first time he'd ever called her "baby" and she almost begged him to never stop repeating that word.

"Shh." She brought her finger up to his lips and kissed them again, before pulling away a bit so she wouldn't forget to breathe. "Don't worry about me. I've done this before."

"Fuck. No need to remind me that." He released a rough groan when she bit his earlobe, trying not to think about all the other men who had felt what he was feeling then. Their breathing then became rough and fast as she tugged on his shirt, and finally pulling it over his head to do the same to her sweater. She didn't have her bra on, so Harry's eyes nearly fell out when he saw her bare chest for the first time.

There was a vulnerability in Y/N's eyes as she felt him gazing at her naked form. With that look on his face, it almost felt like Harry had just seen a woman's breasts for the first time in his life, so she couldn't help but giggle lowly. His eyes didn't linger too long there, just enough for her to know how beautiful she was to him. She was literally trembling when she took his hand and placed it on one breast. He squeezed it gently, feeling the softness of her skin which was turning warm under his palm. One hand at the back of his neck, she urged his face down. Soon he opened his mouth and gently suckled, causing his name to spill out from her mouth, mixing up with wet moans that got his jeans tightened even more.

She was his drug. All it took was one touch and the intoxication was instant. Her scent became more prominent in the tiny space of his backseat and the fragranced hot air got all the blood in his body rushing to one body part.

Before they knew how it happened, they were both naked and their bodies were moving softly together as if they were one. Their tongues entwined in a sloppy kiss when he was finally inside, changing her breathing with every hard thrust as if her moans fueled him to go harder and deeper.

"No...don't...Bambi, look at me." He held her face to demand eye contact, not slowing down as she begged him not to. She struggled to keep her eyes open but never gave into the temptation to get carried away all at once. He watched her face twist with pleasure as his lips parted, hands guiding her hip to move her faster ontop of him.

"Feels good."

"Yea—Yeah? " He furrowed his brows as she did the same, clutching his hair a bit tighter.

"More." She moaned, nodding fast, not to look anywhere else but his green eyes.

"Such a good girl for me. Almost there, baby. C'mon," he coaxed her, capturing her mouth with his own and she caught him by surprise by nipping his bottom lip between her teeth. He was weak for her, entirely defeated under her. If she wanted him to beg, he would, as long as she promised to never stop until they both came undone.

When it happened, Y/N almost forgot how to breathe. She slammed one hand against the foggy window on her side, arching her back when he pounded into her. She couldn't care less if her scream could break the glass as she tossed her head back and dug her nails into his back. Harry released into the condom just a few seconds after her as he finally slowed down and kissed her hard on the lips. The stayed there, panting until they caught our breaths, sweaty foreheads against one another.

It was insane how they managed to get back to her flat, let alone strip each other down again once they had entered the living room. This time, he took her hard against her bedroom wall, still in their dripping clothes, too aroused to care or even make it to the bed. After the third orgasm that followed right after her second, Harry had to catch Y/N's limb body before she collapsed and carried her to the shower. They just stood there leaning onto each other for support, her head on his chest as he washed her hair, letting the warm water run down their flushed skin to wash the rain water, sweat, and the smell of sex all down the drain.

It wasn't until they had returned to the bedroom and began drying off that realization sank back in for both. They just stood there, staring at one another in silent. Harry had only a towel wrapped around his waist now that his clothes were all wet. And Y/N was wearing just a t-shirt big and long enough to look like a dress on her. The feeling was strange, yet new, and exciting.

It was Y/N who took the first steps forward, closing the distance between them two to hug him tight. Without saying a word, he did the same, sniffing in the apple scent of her still soaked hair.

"Stay the night," she said at last. And he happily nodded, squeezing her warm body tight.

Harry had been pacing back and forth for nearly a minute before he finally gained enough courage to ring on his neighbor's doorbell. The boy blew air through his mouth, hollowing up his cheeks as he heard footsteps coming his way. And when the door opened, it wasn't the fourteen-year-old he was there to see, it was her mother. Tam Y/L/N greeted the boy next door with a casual, yet heart-warming smile.

"Harry, look how grown you are! I haven't seen you around in so long," she said. He already knew that it'd been a while since he last came here, but to hear it from someone else made him feel worse somehow. "I heard you got the scholarship that you wanted. Your mother must be so proud."

"Thank you, Mrs. Y/L/N...Is Y/N home?"

"Yeah, she's upstairs. Want me to call her for you?"

"No." He stopped her just as she turned away. "Uhm...I'm leaving tomorrow. I think I should let her know. Can you tell her that for me?"

"Sweetie..." The corners of Tam's lips sank into a frown. "She doesn't even know about the scholarship."

Right. Of course she didn't know. The last time they talked was a year ago when she asked him to take her to that concert but he refused. He couldn't believe it had been that long. They had been two strangers for a year now, so to see her again and tell her he was gonna leave Holmes Chapel and wasn't sure when and if he was ever coming back would make him seem like a jerk. So even though Harry's initial intention when he rang the doorbell was to talk to her in person, but now the thought of it scared him a lot. Harry stood there, stuttering in front of her mother, trying to come up with an excuse so she would help him out by breaking this news to Y/N.

But the woman spoke before he could, "Harry, you know her. If she hears this from me she'll assume she doesn't matter to you." Then came a pause. "Do you care about her?"

He didn't answer that inquiry. But he didn't have to.

"Then I think you should tell her yourself. She really misses you," Tam said, giving the eighteen-year-old boy another smile.

She was right. Even though he had been keeping distance with Y/N for that long, he couldn't walk away knowing she would hate him and think she didn't mean anything to him. After all, she was still the girl he'd got into a fight for and risked getting sick as he walked in the rain to keep her safe. Even if his head told him she didn't matter, his heart knew she did.

After a moment, he finally nodded, and Tam didn't hesitate to turn her head and shouted upstairs,"Y/N, Harry is here to see you!"

"Wait," he spoke after a second thought. "Can you...can you tell her to meet me at our treehouse?"

"Sure, love," the woman said without asking why.

Harry thanked her and walked away quickly before Y/N came down and saw his face. He needed time to think about how to break the news without breaking her heart, and maybe his own.

It had been so long since he last visited their treehouse, and it was quite embarrassing how he had to struggle at first because he'd forgotten how to climb. He sat there on the floor like the night they first met, but this time he was nervous because he knew she was coming.

Harry turned his head as soon as he heard Y/N's voice at the entrance. He got up from the dusty wooden floor, smiling at the girl. Her eyes were still as bright as he remembered. He'd never told her, but all the emotions she was trying to hide always showed through her big eyes and gave away what she was actually feeling. But this time, it was hope that he saw in them. And he knew the goodbye was gonna be twice as hard as how he'd imagined it would be.

They sat down side by side on the edge of their little house with bare feet dangling in the air, listening to the cricket singing their summer song. He knew he was going to miss this, he was going to miss Holmes Chapel, and mostly he was going to miss her. Y/N seemed pretty quiet that night, so Harry had to initiate a conversation, asking her about school, about Celine, about her parent's constant fights. He also filled her in with most of the things that had happened to her in the past year, and kept her updated on his sister and his mum.

But eventually, he must say what he was there to say, "I'm leaving tomorrow morning. To London."

From the way her body stiffened as she heard those words, Harry had expected a different reaction from his little neighbor. However, she only laughed and asked him if he was joking. He wished it had been a joke, then it wouldn't have killed him to say it out loud. He told her about the scholarship, about being accepted into his dream school, and now he could finally follow his dream to become a famous actor. But she was quiet the whole time. He didn't know what she was thinking, he never did.

"I'll come back and visit you next summer," he said, not even sure if he could stay true to those words. But at least they would ease her mind. "I wanted to see you one last time before I left...Bambi, say something."

His Bambi turned to look at him with glistening eyes, and he silently begged her not to dissolve into tears because he wouldn't know what to do. But knowing Y/N, he was sure that she wouldn't allow herself to cry in front of him now that he was basically just a familiar stranger.

"I'm really happy for you, H," she said at last, putting on a smile. So he smiled back at her, reaching out to tuck a strand behind her ear. He told her to be strong when he wasn't around, and take care of herself, though she'd been doing just fine without him in the past year. And deep down, he hoped she would find a boy who wouldn't mind getting a black eye to make her happy. He couldn't be that boy, not anymore.

"This treehouse is all yours now," he told her. "Please look after it?"

"I will," she gave him her words. From the determination written on her face, he knew she would keep her promise, and somehow that made him happy. Maybe because he knew she didn't hated him like he assumed she would.

It was getting late, and he had to catch a train before sunrise. So Harry said his last goodbye to his little neighbor, telling her that they both should get some rest. But instead of letting him go, she cut him off just as he tried to say something else. "Harry...Can I ask you for one last favor?"

"Anything, kid. Tell me."

"Can you...Uhm...Will you..." She exhaled deeply and took his hand in hers. "Will you be my first kiss?"

The grin slowly faded from his face when he realized she was actually serious. "I don't think I should be your first kiss, Bambi. You should save it for the boy you like."

"But you...are the boy I like."

Harry was surprised to hear those words, yet not really. A part of him had always known she'd had a crush on him, but he assumed it would just disappear into thin air real soon. But after a year of acting like they didn't know each other, how could she still call him the boy she liked?

He wanted to lighten up the mood without hurting her feelings, yet he struggled to come up with what to say. But Y/N was impatient as always. She couldn't wait for a reply, probably because she knew she would never get one. So she just followed her instinct and cupped his face to bring her lips to his, only to pull away a second later. It was barely what one would call a kiss, but Harry was in shock and he couldn't even flinch. A fourteen-year-old had just kissed him on the lips. How could he possibly react in this situation? So he chose not to react.

He just sat there and watched her run back to the rope ladder. And the next moment she was gone, for good this time. He didn't think too much about the kiss even though it did put him in shock. But maybe it was for the best if her last memory of him was their moment on the treehouse and not him leaving her without saying goodbye. At least now he knew she wouldn't hate him forever.

She had been a big part of his childhood, and would always be a part of him. So as Harry watched her run back to her house, he truly hoped if they never met again, she would keep him in her memory if not in her heart.

For him, he would also do the same.

Harry woke up in the middle of the night, reaching for the warm body lying next to him, only to find the bed cold and empty. In an instant, he became frantic, thinking Y/N had gone. But it took him a second to calm down and remember he was at her place, not his. The girl hadn't even left the bed. She was just sitting up, holding her knees to her chest and staring at the window. She stayed very still when he crawled to her side.

"Bambi?" His voice was dreadfully quiet. "Are you...Why are you crying, love?" The left side of his chest ached when he saw a tear running down from the corner of her eyes. Slowly she turned to look at him, her lips trembled and her shoulders heaved with emotion when he pulled her to his chest.

"Is it because of me?" He sadly questioned, assuming it must be him. Maybe he shouldn't have been too rough when they had sex, maybe she regretted sleeping with him, maybe she was gonna tell him to leave and never see her again. His whole body tensed up in fear thinking all of those maybes could be true. But eventually, she shook her head no.

"I forgot my cup of tea," she whispered.

That answer left him confused. "Your cup of tea?"

Y/N nodded, staying utterly lifeless in his arms. "It keeps me from having nightmares."

"Is that why you always drink tea before bed?"

"Hmm," she hummed and buried her face into his chest, inhaling his cent as if to remind herself that she'd still got him. After a moment of silence and ragged breathing, she told him, "I saw my mum. She was standing right by a car. But before I could get to her, the car exploded, and all that was left was fire and smoke and the sound of my own screams..."

"Shh." He stroked her hair, pressing butterfly kisses to her forehead. It was then that he realized she was clinging to the locket he'd given her, somehow it put him at ease knowing his birthday gift could lend her some kind of emotional support when she felt afraid. "Want me to make you a cup of tea, love?"

"No. Just...don't let me go."

"Alright."

Harry laid her back down, this time with her back to his chest. When they clasped each other in a warm hug, Y/N could finally be calm enough to listen to the sound of the gentle night rain outside, feeling his chest rising and falling against her back, their breaths in unison.

For a second, Harry wished they could share their hearts as easily as sharing their body heat. He couldn't remember the last time he let another get close to him like this, but Y/N was special; though at the same time, being with her felt like carrying a time bomb. One wrong move and he was a goner, yet every time she tried to leave, it was him who convinced her to stay.

"I'll go to the wedding with you." Her voice pierced right through the silence of the room, causing his eyes to fly open. Y/N thought he didn't hear her, so she repeated the sentence once more, adding, "if your offer still stands."

"It does." He chuckled hoarsely. "What changed your mind though?"

"Thought I should stop running away from reality." That was her answer, nothing more. He didn't really get what she actually meant, but he didn't think she wanted him to ask, so he decided to let it go.

"When are you gonna leave?" She asked.

"Not tonight. I'm staying tonight."

Harry wasn't sure if when she said "leave", she meant him leaving her flat before she woke up, or him leaving her for good. But it didn't really matter. That answer would do for both meanings. Because no matter what happened to them in the future, he knew it wasn't gonna end tonight.

"Good," Y/N murmured with a tiny sigh, making Harry chuckle. His eyes gradually slipped closed, and a few minutes later, he went limp.

#my girl series #harry styles #harry styles smut #harry styles writing #harry styles imagine #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagines #harry styles fanfics #harry styles fanfictions #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles series #actor!harry #older!harry #younger!y/n

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bluepluto03 · 4 years

Text

mcu spiderman rewrite/au i may or may not do

ok so first quick disclaimer! i do not hate the mcu spider man movies in any way!! i actually enjoy them quite a bit and have seen homecoming like 4 times! and i absolutely adore all the actors in the movies, especially tom, zendaya, and jacob

but the problem w/ the mcu spiderman movies is,,, they’re just not spiderman. at least from a writing/thematic perspective, which sucks bc so much other stuff about them is great! like tom holland is the perfect peter parker, which is why it seems so close to being right, but with the way the script is actually written... it’s just. not spider-man.

i feel the need to explain all this/my problems w/ the movies b4 i get into the actuall au idea/plot, so please bear with me for a sec

for context, I’ve loved spiderman my whole life. i’d watch the cartoons when i was younger, and then went back and watched them all again when i was a bit older and figured out how to pirate stuff lol. i didn’t really know how to get into the comics, so i just kinda read wikis and got second-hand info from fanfics and the other movies

to me, spiderman, (at least, peter parker spiderman,) was always about like... a kid, who saw the world was broken and fixed it because he could. he had the power to fix stuff, so he did.

as a kid w/ mental illness and a not so great home life... that was something really really important to me. to see another kid out there, who’s been through some shit, but finally has the power to make stuff better, so he is! and it would make me think, maybe i can change stuff for the better, someday, if i just get my chance

but,,,,, the problem is mcu peter parker isn’t that.

instead of becoming spiderman bc he knows there’s bad in the world and wants to fix it, suddenly his motivation is impressing tony stark?? and don’t get me wrong i don’t hate tony, but the way they wrote his and peter’s relationship basically trapped peter. he could no longer be his own hero, bc he was tony’s successor. and that's never who peter parker’s spiderman was?? he was never a follower, he was a trendsetter. he didn’t become spiderman for approval, hell he had dozens of newspapers constantly slandering him.

honestly the following in someone else’s footsteps thing was always a miles morales thing. he had to step up to the plate and fill the shoes of a spiderman who had already existed for years and was beloved by the whole city. obviously thats not all he is and simplifying his character to that is incredibly obtuse, but i bring it up bc tbh alot of stuff w/ mcu peter parker is just straight-up ripped off from miles morales. like how peter now goes to a fancy private school, is no longer poor (which is a huge thing w/ peter parker’s character in like every other incarnation), has a living father figure, and is bffs w/ ned, who is a straight-up rip off of miles’s best friend ganke. (for the record tho i adore ned and jacob i’m def keeping him in my rewrite,,,, also i’m glad he’s in the movie bc having a plus sized poc protagonist thats not constantly mocked is incredible)

so, i’m complaining about all this stuff lol but ur probably wondering how exactly how i wanna fix it lol,,,,

first, give peter an arc thats more than just..... i want tony to believe in me. my idea for that is basically a type of thing where he learns to rely on others! bc like... peter isn’t good at working w/ others lol, he’d much rather do it all himself so no one else gets hurt. (like in the andrew garfield movies where he just,,,, webs his gf to a car so she can’t run into danger lmao)

the plot would start at a similar ish position to homecoming, though tony never recruits peter for civil war. tbh not sure if it even happened but we’ll disscuss that later

peter’s been spiderman for a few months, after a trip to oscorp left him w/ a radioactive spider bite. currently no one knows about it, and he’s doing a pretty ok job of dealing w/ everything on his own. until he takes down a big bad, lets say rhino for now, and gains a ton of publicity. after stooping a hudge disaster he’s suddenly in the limelight, and catches the attention of one norman osborn, aka the green goblin

now, quick sidenote. green goblin is genreally seen as pretty goofy, but there are comic versions of him that are legit terrifying. if im being honest i didn’t even know about that version until i read aloneintherains fic birds eating other birds so ig thats kinda ish how i’m imagining this version of norman? though alot more composed, like the man who could someday turn into that

so norman becomes intrested in my boy peter, and starts sending ppl after him. possibly the sinister 6, but uhh maybe not bc tbh i think this “rewrite” needs to be split into 2 “movies”/works and i might wanna save that for the hypothetical pt2 (btw if i write this it won’t b for a while cause i got other stuff going on but ig if ppl are intrested i might write some snippits/make more content for it)

so basically the main plot is peter dealing w/ all these big bads on his own, doing ok at first but later getting really fucked up, and eventually revealing himself to ned and mj which ends up being the only way he can save the day in the end. by relying on others! yay!!

thats it for the main plot, but don’t worry y’all we got other stuff going on too lmao

so, for one. my boy peter is realizing he has a crush and just,,,, freaking tf out. (i have yet to decide if it’s on ned or mj. or both. sue me) the crush isn’t definitely resolved in p1, but i imagine there’d be some cute thing of him suddenly realizing and freaking out and almost revealing his powers.

thing 2! tony stark! he is still in here, and still a mentor to peter, but in a pretty drastically different way. one, he doesn't know about peter being spiderman. he doesn't even suspect it lmao. he just gets involved bc of.... some sort of reason bc peter is so smart. do i know why just yet? no. does it matter? probably but i’m writing this pretty late after i had school all day so i’m too tired to care

bc tony basically gives peter a real internship/mentorship type thing, peter now has access to all this tech!! and all these funds!! fucking lit!! so he changes from his pajama suit to the fancy one, tho he actually built it!! which i feel like him making his suit is a really big really important part of his character. so it doesn't really have all those random things tony added, tho peter might add stuff himself. he gets Karan as a like assistant ai as part of his internship but she never gets put into the suit

for the fist part tony plays a super minor role but like,,,, the first part is about osborn taking an intrest in him, and him confiding in ned and mj. the second part norman is become progressively more dangorus and peter has to fight him and stuff, kinda proving he is strong enough to be spiderman/be trusted to the whole world, beyond just ned and mj. also him actually getting together w/ either one or both of them bc...... bc i want that.

oh btw idk if tony finds out or not in p2? if he does it’s either at the end or in a scene like the one w/ may bc like. please imagine the shenanigans of peter and ned (who both have high intellegence but low wisdom) in tony’s lab, obviously trying to hide the fact that peter’s spiderman. like he walks in on them and peter looks all frumpy bc he’s been trying to change real fast, and ned’s shirt is messed up bc he just stuffed the mask down the front of it, and mj is just. chilling behing them. so tony just like assumes stuff and is like....aight.... have fun....

oh btw the last big change that i didn’t really have anyway to insert natrually into this,,,, so remember how i said ned was kinda a ripoff of ganke? well, the writers claim he’s a “composite character” so i figured, why not give him traits from other famous spiderman side character so he actually is a composite character!

so like,,,, throughout p1 it’s referenced that ned has a kinda dickish estranged ish dad that he hates and his mom doesn't really like but kinda forces him too... theres some mentions of his dad wanting him to transfer to a private school and being kinda rich, bur he dosen’t want to bc he knows his dad is a total dickead,,,, anyway end of the movie we find out norman osborn is ned’s dad, and ned hates him even fucking more bc it’s like bitch?? u tried to get my (maybe) bf murdered?? tf?? and its lowkey bc he can’t reveal peter’s id, but then in p2 after norman takes matters into his own hands and tries to kill peter on his own ned just fucking yells at him while the man is in jail and is like fuck u lmao

soooo thats my really messy au idea!! i’m really tired sorry if this is hard to understand or rude! for the record i have nothing against the ppl who adore these movie’s, i just think they could be better!

#spiderman #spider man homecoming #spiderman homecoming #peter parker #tony stark #michelle jones #ned leeds #parkerleeds #spideychelle #peter x mj x ned #marvel #pls rb i worked p hard on this #my post #my writing #norman osborn #green goblin #mcu spiderman

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eimagines · 5 years

Text

love drug // jeff pfister

pairing: jeff pfister x reader genre: smut summary: after bringing the two crackheads their coffee, you bite off more than you thought you could chew with a certain blonde scientist. warnings: rushed spicy stuff, drug use. bratty sub behaviour? idk I ain't good with defining sexy stuff lmao word count: 2900

a/n: lowkey a joke. highkey not.

“If you can get four, then get four,” Mutt spoke down the phone.

“If I get four, then I'm having one,” you responded as you stood in a slow-moving queue, scanning the list of coffee sizes and flavours.

“I gave you the money for me and Jeff, not for you,” Mutt responded to your growing annoyance.

“So you can spend grands on cocaine and hookers but refuse to by your own sister a cuppa’ coffee? Really great brother you are,” you replied, your voice oozing sarcasm, ordering the four coffees and waiting for them patiently, “I’m not your assistant Mutt, next time you can get your own damn coffee.” You hung up before he gave you another snarky response about not needing to do anything himself. Sighing, you thanked the cashier and left the aroma filled coffee shop, four caramel macchiatos in hand.

You loved your brother, but he was an asshole.

The walk to the Kineros Robotics building wasn’t far, and with the weather warm on your skin as you walked, you’d much preferred it to driving. Mutt has offered to let you take his car, but you preferred the simplicity of walking and pretty much hated the extravagance of Mutt’s new lifestyle choices.

The sleek elevator of the building took you down to Mutt’s place of worship, the modern minimalistic white walls bright and often headache inducing. Splashes of colour from the lady in purple was the only thing that stood vibrant amongst the desolate canvas of white, the sound of your boots on the floor and tapping of computer keys the only noises to bounce of the plain walls of the eerily long corridor.

“Hope you like macchiatos.” You said as you casually placed a coffee cup in front of Miss Venable, the purple of her clothing against her bright orange hair complimenting but making your eyes sore.

Miss Venable has an authoritative God Complex, but she never managed to intimidate you. She could tell you to get out as much as she wanted and you could simply laugh in her face, acting sickly sweet always furthered her annoyance. You would be kind where you could be, knowing that working for your brother and his idiot friend Jeff all day every day was probably the most frustrating job in the world.

“I don’t see the need to take pleasure in caffeinated drinks, especially when at work.” She responded.

“Stop living like a robot for once, it’s only coffee,” You responded with a sigh and a smile, “I won’t tell anyone, promise, plus, it’s on Mutt.”

As you strolled past the large glass windows and into Mutt and Jeff’s office you spotted the orange-haired lady in the reflection of the glass, sipping quickly at her coffee. You gave her a sly smirk, shaking your head and rolling your eyes. Typical.

Huge mountains of white powder littered the room, Jeff and Mutt sat at their desks, typing away at their laptops furiously.

“I think if I stay in this room long enough I’d breathe in enough cocaine to kill me,” You sighed as you sat Mutt’s coffee down in front of him, throwing your tote bag from your shoulder onto the floor next to Jeff’s desk, “You guys are so gross, how long have you been in here?”

“What only one coffee?” Mutt asked ignoring your question, his attention turning from his computer coding onto you as you passed Jeff’s coffee over to him as well. Jeff gave you a small smile.

“You want me to pour that coffee all over your head or are you gonna drink your one coffee and shut the hell up?” You asked Mutt, throwing his bank card at him as Jeff peered over the top of his computer screen to watch you both, chuckling under his breath. Mutt gave you a glare as you hopped up onto Jeff’s desk, leaning over him slightly to inspect his work.

“What are you working on?” You asked, looking at his computer interested. You spotted the way his eyes left his computer and stalked across your legs, resting his gaze on your thighs for a moment. You rolled your eyes with a smile.

Hopping off his desk, you lowered your voice as not to gain the attention of Mutt who sat barely meters away, “Y’know, if your gonna keep staring at me you should try not being so obvious about it.”

It wasn’t hard for you to get under Jeff’s skin. You’d managed to rile him up a fair few times in the past, even managing to give him a boner at a family party. Jeff wasn’t exactly what you looked for in a partner; a cocaine addiction was bound to warn anyone away. You still found yourself looking forward to winding him up when you came to visit Mutt. You found yourself thinking about him more and more. You’d even caught yourself on a couple of occasions feeling annoyed if Mutt would mention Jeff sleeping with an escort or fucking the accountant from the building across the road. You took pleasure in watching his face turn red and him shuffle in his seat when you teased him.

“What are you doing today?” Mutt asked as you wandered around the room aimlessly, poking at their robots in both disgust and amazement.

“Nothing,” you responded in annoyance, “I was supposed to be working on some installation in Florida this week, something to do with a string of murders in the 50′s but the guy running it decided to go get himself killed, so now I’m free all week.”

“How compassionate of you.” Mutt said sarcastically. You snarled at him, sitting in one of the many spinning leather chairs across from him.

“What are you guys working on?” You sighed, still interested, screwing up a little ball of paper and throwing it at Mutt.

“Just coding some updates,” Jeff replied, inspecting the realistic robotic doll hand on his desk. You rolled your chair over to watch him. “People are complaining that the speeds aren't varied enough and the wrist movements aren't as natural as they should be. Assholes. They never stop asking for more.” He sighed as you watched him play around with some wiring.

“Pffft. Like they’d even know. They're paying for a fucking sex robot, I doubt they’ve ever been near a real woman.”

“Hey! Don't disrespect the craft or the customer!” Mutt shouted, sniffing a line of already finely cut cocaine from off the table in front of him. Jeff followed suit and you shot them both a glare.

“You’re both so fucked up.” You rolled your eyes, as Jeff watched you stand, his eyes trailing down your body slowly. He didn’t know if it was the cocaine making him more sexually aroused but he knew he’d always found you attractive. Watching you saunter around his office aimlessly drove him a little mad with excitement. He wished that Mutt wasn’t here, that he had the office to himself and he was free to do whatever he wanted with you and you with him. You were a forbidden fruit, consistently teasing him into taking a bite for himself.

“You ever think about making a male version of these things?” You said lifting one of the robot's arms up and letting it go so it fell at her side.

“Be careful with her!” Mutt looked at you annoyed.

“Why would we do that?” Jeff asked.

“Cause there's just as many sad lonely sexually frustrated woman out there wanting to fuck as there are men,” you watched Jeff wriggle in his seat as he listened to you, “You guys could really expand your audience.”

Mutt laughed. “We’re not gonna spend our valuable time making huge man dicks for horny old women.”

“Fine.” You shrugged, sipping at your coffee and eyeing Jeff up who stared at you intently as you sucked on your straw teasingly, “But you perverts are missing out on a plethora of nerdy virgin and milf porn with those camera vision things. Just saying.”

You grabbed your jacket and coffee in your hand and started to make your way out of their man cave, “I want 20% of your profit if you do it or I’ll sue you both.”

“Whatever,” Mutt called, without turning to say goodbye, his focus still on his computer and mountain of cocaine.

“Bye nerds.” You called, giving Jeff a sly wink as he watched your figure disappear behind the white corridor walls.

You were in the bathroom when you realised you’d left your bag in the office. Jeff, however, had realised you’d left your bag immediately - hoping you’d done it on purpose so that you’d come back afterwards when it was just you and him and he could fuck you on Mutt’s desk.

He’d eyed it for a while. Staying silent in-between line after line of cocaine up his nostrils and a few taps at his keyboard. He couldn’t concentrate on anything; you had preoccupied his mind and filled all the spaces with images of you moaning beneath him. He tapped his pen against his smooth white desk, biting the pen lid between his teeth, his eyes focussed on your bag.

‘If she left it accidentally she will be back for it soon,’ Jeff thought to himself, frustration building up in his mind.

Jeff had everything he’d ever wanted, everything other than you. With that thought in mind, he decided to go for it; to hunt you down with the gentlemanly excuse of returning your possessions and attempt to sweep you off your feet in the process. He was tired of being tormented and teased. And what was the worst that could happen?

He took to his feet quickly, mumbling an excuse to an uninterested Mutt, and sweeped the bag from off of the floor, darting out of the office quickly.

“You seen [Y/N] around? She left her bag.” Jeff asked Miss Venable in a desperate tone.

“She excused herself to the bathroom. I can take that off of your hands if you wish?” She asked, suspicion running through her cold voice.

Jeff shook her off, stalking towards the office bathroom just around the corner without another word. His body, and nose, were filled with false confidence. His heart felt like it had come out of his chest when he saw you leaving the bathroom, jacket thinly covering your shoulders. You stood, both staring at each other at opposite ends of the corridor. He felt like no amount of cocaine could give him the confidence he needed to be able to do what he wanted to most.

“Jeff.” You called to him, a small smile on your lips. You felt a little excitement flare in your chest, wondering what sort of divine entity had managed to bless you with Jeff stood awkwardly by himself in front of you.

“[Y/N],” He responded quickly, his legs moving him towards you before he knew what he was doing, “You left your bag.”

You smiled at him suspiciously, surprised at his genuine gesture, “Thanks. You didn’t have to.”

“I know, I wanted to.” He replied staring at you, his eyes obviously lustful and frustrated. You were both silent for a while, just staring at each other.

“Well, if there's nothing else you want,” You said, delicately grazing your fingers over Jeff’s hand as you took your bag from him, teasing him even more, “I’ll see you.”

Jeff wrapped his hand around your wrist as you attempted to walk away from him, causing you to shoot him a look of both confusion, annoyance and lust.

“You know what I want.” Jeff breathed out heavily, seriousness riddled in his voice, his eyes even darker than usual. You could feel your heart quickening as the grip on your wrist got tighter.

“And what is that?” You teased him further.

He didn’t reply, simply dragging you back into the toilet cubicle you had exited from. He ignored your huffed laughs and weak protests as he locked the door behind you both, pushing you against the nearest wall and pressing his lips against yours desperately before you could question his actions.

You couldn’t think at first. It felt like your mind went blank as Jeff pinned your body against the cold tiled wall behind you. You grabbed his face, deepening the kiss, smiling at how easily you’d managed to get him right where you wanted him and eagerly sucking at his bottom lip.

Jeff broke the kiss first, taking off his shirt and throwing it to the floor. You followed his actions, taking off your thin jacket and connecting your lips desperately once more as you clumsily backed him against the sinks and attempted to unbutton his belt.

As you fiddled with his jeans he fiddled with yours, pulling off your shirt and shuffled his jeans down to his ankles. Each item of clothing that was pulled off sent lust to pool between your thighs. Each kiss of Jeff’s lips against the hot skin of your neck sent tingles down your spine.

"Fuck,” He cursed as he spun you around to face the mirrors that hovered over the sinks. He was behind you and you watched as he sucked purple spots onto your exposed flesh, your hands finding their way into his hair as his found there way into your underwear, “You’re so wet.” Jeff took this as a personal achievement, his digits sliding across your heat as he watched your mouth open and a moan slip out.

“Do you have any idea what you do to me?” He said, frustration clear in his voice, his growing excitement rubbing against you as he bent you over the sink harshly, his fingers leaving your warmth and pulling the thin fabric down your legs and away from your body. You were exposed to him, finally at his mercy.

He took his length out and pumped himself a few times, sticking one of his fingers inside you as you bit your lip in excitement and pleasure. The hurriedness of the situation and the worry that filled you both in case you were caught, it turned you on more than anything you’d experienced in the past.

“You have to stop teasing me, [Y/N],” Jeff said as he replaced his finger with the tip of his dick, rubbing it against your folds, eager to turn the tables, “How would like it I left you here now? Horny and alone. Humiliated. You’d hate it.”

“But you wouldn’t do that.” You hummed knowingly, moving your ass back and desperate for more contact.

“You think your smart to tease me the way you do?” Jeff said, taking a handful of your hair in his hand roughly, “You’re such a little brat.”

“Jeff, shut up and fuck me.” You shouted, causing him to laugh lightly, yank your hair up and pull you onto his thick throbbing length.

You both let out a moan of satisfaction. He never let you adjust to his size, slamming into you fast and hard, in and out, the sounds of skin slapping on skin bouncing off the small enclosed walls of the bathroom immediately. His fingers let go of your hair and grabbed at your thighs, driving his hips into yours fast and hard, his thumbs digging into you harshly and the cold feeling of the sink digging into your front. You watched in the mirror as Jeff fucked you from behind, his face contorting in pleasure, his eyes catching your own with a devilish smile.

“You like watching me fuck you, huh?” He asked, grabbing at your neck and pulling you up so your back was pressed flush again his chest, his cock still driving in and out of you fast, both of you watching each other in the reflection as Jeff kissed sloppily at your neck, using his free hand to rub circles on your throbbing clit.

You moaned at the feeling, Jeff’s name spilling from your swollen lips. The sound of his name from your fucked out tired voice sent him crazy, the pleasure from your tight walls wrapped around him giving him an experience that no amount of drugs could compare to.

He kept on at your clit, surprisingly accurate for a man who loves cocaine and maths a little too much. The feeling off his throbbing cock deep inside you, his fingers rubbing at you sensitive nub, the way his hips snapped into yours and his hand grabbed at your throat was too much for you. Your legs were becoming weaker and the coil in your stomach was about to come undone.

“Don’t stop Jeff, oh fuck,” You moaned out, grabbing at his strong thighs behind you leaving little nail marks in your fingertips wake.

“You gonna cum?” Jeff asked confidently. You nodded taking your bottom lip in your teeth to stop yourself from moaning too loudly, the feeling of euphoria erupting from your stomach and spreading through your body.

Your legs quivered as your orgasm pulsated throughout your core, you walls contracting around Jeff’s cock. He moaned at the feeling, fucking you through your orgasm, letting go of your throat and pushing you against the sinks once more. You gripped onto the sinks to keep your tired body up as Jeff continued to pound into you, soon pulling out and finishing on your back with a loud groan of your name.

“Fuck.” He swore breathlessly, his hands rubbing at your thighs fondly, placing a sweet kiss on the nape of your neck, a harsh contrast to the Jeff who just fucked you into the bathroom sinks a couple minutes ago.

“You better clean that up.” You shot him a smirk.

He shot you a smirk back through the mirror, looking at your flushed red and sweaty face. He could definitely get used to seeing you in this manner.

“You should leave your bag in the office more often.”

A/N: I decided to have the reader not sniff cocaine cause not everyone is comfortable with that shit and also its lowkey triggering for my cocaine habit lmao. Cocaine is a hell of a drug kids I suggest not indulging in it what-so-ever; also I think Jeff would be emotionally all over the place cause of all the drugs so I wrote him in a way where he’s confident and then not it’s because that’s something it will do lol. Also, coke affects your sex drive so if this was irl he’d likely be struggling to even keep it up, gonna thank satan for that one. Also, yes I think Jeff is a talker and a little bit rough; stereotyped but he is a Satanist after all!

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thvodora · 4 years

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hello !! i’m luna, from the est, and i use she/her pronouns !! this is my baby theodora (aka dory but can also be called theo/thea/teddi/etc. skjdfjks) !! below i have a whole summary of her bio and personality, and also some ideas for connections if you’re into that !! if you’d like to plot, please message me on discord @luna#6219 or like this and i will come to you (most likely on discord, but tumblr im also works) !! if you have time to read things that are way too long, feel free to peek at her biography, statistics, personality traits, headcanons, pinterest, and playlist !! okay let’s dive in !

( lee ji-eun, cisfemale ) hey ! have you seen THEODORA KWON around ? SHE works as a ICE SKATING INSTRUCTOR at big bear resort, but they must be off their shift by now. well, if you do see them can you let me know ? they’re 20 years old & they’ve been working here for FOUR MONTHS. they tend to be +AMBITIOUS & +FASTIDIOUS, but can also be -DOGMATIC & -PREDICTABLE. the other employees have labeled them THE POLYMATH. thanks a lot ! ( delicate fingernails painted red grazing over a piano, wilted flowers resting in the sunlight, elaborate sand sculptures washed away by the tides, ripples in otherwise perfectly still water, & tea-stained book pages )

biography (tw: car accident)

theodora basically grows up w/ two controlling parents who are doctors, but she has a relatively ok childhood where she spends most of her time with her brother. she reads a lot, does well in school, takes some piano lessons, all that jazz

then her mother has an affair and so her parents divorce when dory’s 10 y/o and she’s pretty distraught, split between households. she’s especially spiteful of her mother and her mother’s boyfriend.

her brother leaves for harvard, which sets high expectations for her to excel similarly. but this absence + anger from the divorce + pressure to do well culminates into her accidentally falling into the Mean Girl™ clique at her high school. they basically rebel, party hard, and are super condescending to/basically bully others but all this peer pressure and social conformity is enough for her to ignore her Bad Behavior

she crushes on and later dates the whole ringleader of the clique’s/her bff’s crush. she’s so in love but then at a party she finds her bf + her bff kissing and its just rly bad. her bff has pretty much spread rumors about her, her boyfriend ridicules her, and dory’s effectively thrown out of the social circle.

now with an outsider’s perspective she realizes how terrible she’s been and succumbs to her guilt. she becomes super introverted and only sticks to studying hard and reading books and playing the piano. she tries to apologize to the ppl that she used to bully and tries to insert herself back into high school society but it doesn’t rly work

so she carries on like this, fighting with her parents yet adhering to their expectations + virtually outcasted but sticking to her studies. then her brother comes home over break and gets into a really bad car accident. he ends up being hospitalized and paralyzed waist down.

dory’s pretty angry so she ends up tracking the case and watches it happen in court, but the judge/jury/lawyers suck and nothing really happens to the drunk driver who caused the accident

this spurs her into an epiphany that she can right her wrongs and right these wrongs by becoming a lawyer herself, taking justice into her own hands. her parents hate the idea because they don’t think that dory has what it takes + try to persuade her not to, telling her it’s dangerous, unstable, time-consuming, etc. she doesn’t care anymore, though, and seeing how her brother has decided to take a gap year and travel, she frees herself from her parents and goes off to yale for pre-law.

then her dad is diagnosed with early on-set dementia and she decides to move closer to his home to take care of him. she transfers to a uni in colorado, and then gets a job at the resort to a) get that $$$ to help support her dad + her education and b) she’s gone to the resort b4 as like an annual family vacay and is a lil sentimental !

she visits her dad a bunch but it’s a lowkey secret, she feels slightly embarrassed and also is just generally quite private

so that’s it! she’s basically just a hell of a mess who still hasn’t forgiven herself for all her mistakes in high school and still feels like she needs to conform + control everything as much as possible + be “perfect” .... but more on that in the next part

personality

my gal dory is the . most . uptight perfectionist ever . she’s super detail oriented and will undoubtedly nit pick at everything she can, both about others + herself. she’s the type to always take control in a group project because a) it has to be done in a specific way for her and b) she doesn’t really trust other people with her grades.

she’s super pragmatic and is super frugal. she hates people who talk their way around things and would rather just have direct communication and be to the point. she’s so honest and brutally critical that it gets her into a bunch of confrontations but.. she doesn’t really mind it. she lowkey loves arguing and asserting her opinion (cause she thinks it’s correct), hence the whole lawyer thing

curious about everything and if you know her well she can ramble on about an insane amount of topics if you give her the time. but like if you know her well... don’t give her that time sdkjfnsk

stubborn and holds grudges, doesn’t forgive easily aka if you lose her trust it’s pretty hard to get it back. super hard to sway her in your favor/opinion. like try to get her to spontaneously go to a party night of? sorry she hasn’t factored it into her planner two weeks in advance and also she hates parties ksdnfgks

loves playing the piano!!! is currently trying to figure out how to dj!!! but she keeps it lowkey

learned to skate when she was pretty young!! by no means an olympic skater but she does like skating bc its v graceful and she loves 2 be on the ice

basically. self-critical, hates Fun, perfectionist who is the embodiment of an istj, enneagram type 1, slytherin, & capricorn sun so....... enjoy

this is a terrible summary please go read her headcanons + personality traits page its so much more well written skfnksndfvbs

wanted connections !!

here’s a link to a tag i have for some ideas and also here’s my connections page w/ some wanted connections but i’m down for anything we brainstorm!!

#❝ ♤ ┊ ◜ᴀʜʜ ꜱᴛᴏᴘ ɪ ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ'ᴠᴇ ᴅʀᴏᴘᴘᴇᴅ ᴍʏ ᴄʀᴏɪꜱꜱᴀɴᴛ◞ 》 ooc.#bigbearintro

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queen-rogah · 5 years

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Friendly Gesture (Gwilym Lee x Reader)

Summary: Gwilym takes you to his parent's summer cabin and everything just got carried away.

Warnings: sexual references, SMUT and mini fluff :)

Word Count: 5k+ words

gifs not mine! All credits to those who made it!

MASTERLIST

"Gwil! I swear I don't wanna go! Like ever!."

You stomp around your room as you argue with your bestfriend for almost years that you can't count. Both of your mother's have been the best buddies in their highschool days and guess what, they got pregnant at the same year too, specifically when they are both at 23 or so. And then the friendship began because of those little play dates that your mother would set up with Gwilym. Then years have passed, never really believing why you're still friends with him because he's a total jackass, a prankster, a total asshole. But god knows you still love him like that.

"It's just for three nights Y/N! We'll stay at my parent's cabin by the lake where we both used kayak for the first time when we're like...I don't know-- 10 year's old?. I'm just gonna visit my grandmother's place just close to the cabin and I'll be giving the gift that mom is giving. Is that clear?." He said while laying on the edge of your bed.

You huffed in annoyance, his ass won't let you go with this mini trip because you let him in your house and you know he will never ever leave the place when you can't agree on something he says, "Fuck you Gwil. I'm gonna fucking pack my clothes for this fucking trip." You grumble and faced your closet, taking some of your clothes and put it in a backpack.

"I fucking love you Y/N, thank you!." He said as he suddenly hugged you, squeezing you as you groaned. But you broke a smile, since you have missed him hugging you like this again.

"Why aren't you asking Natalie for this trip? You could have asked her to stay with you." You said while packing. You got no response back, so you turn your back around to see him texting someone on his phone, smirking and biting down his lip like he's watching some porn or something.

"Hey! I'm talking to you!." You shouted and he whip his head at you, looking so dumbfounded.

"What? What did you say?." He asked. You just have to open your mouth to say your question again but he looks back on his phone again. You rolled your eyes and continue packing until you are done with all of your needs for this three day stay in your asshole of a friend's family cabin.

You stood up from the carpeted floor and sat beside him, peeping on his phone to surprisingly see a picture of a girl holding out her boobs in front of the mirror, wearing nothing but a thin laced panties. And yeah, it's Natalie, his girlfriend, "So that's why you're looking all so aroused or some other shit."

Seeing nude pictures of girls in his phone was totally normal for the both of you, "I actually heard your question earlier about Natalie." He smirked and you looked at him in menace, feeling so irritated right now.

"I tried asking her for this trip, even luring her in saying that I can fuck her in those three days in our cabin but she can't." You grimaced at that but he kept going, "She said that her sister will come home from work."

"So it's gonna be me." You said in your monotone voice. Getting used in being the second choice, which is your biggest pet peeve. You don't want to be the second best, especially when they think of you as a damn replacement. But you're just doing this for your friend here and you lowkey wanna meet his grandmother again since she liked you more than her own grandchild.

"Yeah. It's you and me again." He said and pushed you here, letting your whole body forced down on your bed. You grunted and pushed him too, making him lie down your bed as you are still laughing, straddling his lap as you tickled his sides, watching him squirm underneath you and letting out uncontrollable laughs and screams. When something is suddenly poking the inside of your thighs, since you're just wearing a thin cotton pajama shorts, you screamed as you quickly got off his lap, your butt meeting the ground with a loud thud.

"Fucking hell I just felt you close to my vagina!." You shouted and that made him laugh like crazy. You're definitely blushing in front of him, aside from being embarassed, the wrong thing is that you're growing wet in your panties. You lowkey dry humped him there!

"And what's wrong with that? Natalie caused this with her picture. Fucking hell." He said and stood up from your bed as he helped you get up from the floor. You try your best in hiding being so remorseful on what happened and what you've felt about it.

"I'll be picking you up by 8 tomorrow morning. See you peach." He said, calling you in the old nickname he used to call you. When he left your room, you lie down your bed as you touched your panties inside your shorts, still feeling wet as you cursed in discomposure.

"Stupid fucking hormones."

...

You are now walking towards Gwilym's car with your bag hanging in one strap on your shoulder. You hop in and shot him a small smile before saying goodbye to your mother by the front door of your house as he drive away from the street and to the cabin for you to stay for three whole days. Why that long?.

"Why three days?." You asked and he chuckles, glancing at you as he still focuses on driving.

"Maybe I'm gonna say that it's just gonna be two days and one night since we'll be staying there by night later. Tomorrow, we'll be visiting grandma and the next day, we'll be doing whatever we want in the cabin. Swim at the lake, ride the kayaks and start up a bonfire. You know, like a small bonding of you and me as best buds for years." He said and you smiled in delight on his plan. You kinda like his plan for the stay there.

Then suddenly you heard his phone ringing from his pocket as he groaned, "Fuck, that's Natalie. Can you get my phone in my pocket and answer it for me?."

"What? No! She hates my guts, still assuming that we're both messing around behind her back even though it's not. So, no, I won't talk to her." You said but Gwilym didn't care on what you just said.

"Please Y/N..." He pleaded.

You sighed in defeat and took his phone from his pocket, answering the call, "Hey Natalie." You annoyingly responded. Glancing over to Gwil who's smiling at you as wriggled his brows before looking at the road again.

"Oh Y/N! Surprising to hear from you again! Where's Gwilly?." She asked. You cringed a bit at that nickname.

"He's driving, so I'm holding his phone right now." You said, tapping your fingers on your thighs, wanting to end this conversation with Natalie.

"Turn to speaker phone." She said and you did. Letting him to talk.

"Hi baby. How are you?." He asked and hear her giggle in the other line.

"I'm fine Gwilly, just here to say take care for the trip to your grandma's. Tell her I say hi." She said.

"I will baby." He replied. Your hand started to ache on holding it up for him, so you rested your elbow just beside the hand brake of the car.

"And I touched myself thinking about you earlier." She seductively said and that made you roll your eyes again. Here we go again.

"That's hot baby, I wish I was there to help you out." He smirks. Never caring that you're here, holding his phone as they start sex calling in front of you.

"Am I just gonna remind you two that I'm here hearing those fucking words out of your mouths?." You spoke in your silence and that made Gwil smirk beside you as he stopped talking.

"Oops sorry Y/N, just reminding you too that I already have my fingers on my pussy right now. I--" You ended the call and put the phone down on the dashboard of the car. Feeling so uncomfortable right now.

"Why are you acting so bitter when we're talking about sex? You're not like that before, you used to laugh at me and joke about it." Gwilym said and you huffed out some air from your lungs.

"And why do you care?." You bitterly responded to him and he widen his eyes at you.

"Are you on your period or something?." He asked, feeling so amused in what's happening now.

"What? Fuck no! I'm not in my period right now, what are you saying?." You said, stuttering in your words too. Now he's making you nervous, you don't know why.

"What I'm saying that you're acting bitter and angry when it comes to sex. You're not on your period, maybe you're pregnant." He guesses and your eyes widened.

"I'm not fucking pregnant you dumbass! I haven't got laid since--" You trailed off and stayed silent. Now Gwilym is gonna tease the life out of you.

"Don't you say that you had your last orgasm when you still had sex with your ex-boyfriend before. Like...three years ago?." He asked, with a growing smirk on his face.

"It's two years Gwil! Not three, but that's too long. But I just had a steamy make-out session with a random guy I've met at a pub before, I don't remember him anymore. Honestly, I didn't got in any relationships after Kenny. I haven't found a guy in my life." You said and he clicked his tongue.

"That fucking sucks." He remarks and that just made you frown and look away from him.

After an hour of driving, Gwil finally stopped his car in front of the cabin. Still looking the same from the outside but different on the inside since you see the interior on the glass windows of it. When you both left the car and entered the cabin, you let out a gasp to see the inside looked beautiful. It finally have this modern design and new furnitures. It's like the cabin you see in movies or tv shows.

"Wow. It became so beautiful." You said, dropping your bag on the couch. You want to live here forever if it's possible.

"It is. Mom made a great job." Gwilym says beside you and lead you to the kitchen, offering you as glass of water from that one hour drive. He sat on the stool and drank more water than you.

"And your father did a great decision in building a cabin like this. And now it looks like a damn cabin that celebrities own is just the bestest thing. I wanna stay here for much longer than three days but too bad I hate being with you." You said as you shot him a smirk, making him act like a knife got stabbed in his heart.

"You'll never hate me if I'll take you here by every month." He smirks too and you chuckled.

"Is that a threat or a treat for me?." You teased and he lean in to you, too close like he's inches away in kissing you. The red color around your cheeks began to fade in again.

"Maybe both Y/N Y/L/N. Maybe both."

...

"Gwil!."

When you both entered his grandmother's house, she stood up from her rocking chair as Gwilym made his way towards her, giving her a sweet kiss on her cheek. You just stood behind Gwil, with a smile on your face as you see his grandma again for three whole years. You can't tell how glad you still see her so energetic and well, since she's now 86 or so.

"Hey there." Gwilym replied to her as he gave her a hug once more before beckoning you to come close. You shyly took steps closer to them and felt his hand snaked around your waist, presenting you to his grandmother again.

"Who's this Gwil?." She asked, putting on her eyeglasses to see you clearly.

"It's Y/N, nana." You chuckled and see her facial expression changed a bit when you mentioned your own name.

"Y/N! I haven't seen you since you and Gwil graduated in your college years! How are you my dear?." She asked, holding your hand as she motioned you to sit down on the couch.

"I'm fine nana, I have missed you too. You remember saying to me that you like me better than Gwil?." You said and that made Gwilym hum beside you, remembering those times.

"I remember that! And until now I still like you more than Gwilly here. I just can't believe I didn't recognized you when you walked in here. You looked ravishing, more beguiling than before." She chuckles. Tapping your thigh as you began to blush on her remark. No one called you beautiful like that, only lovely old ladies will see that beauty and it's just adorable.

"And how's your life after college dear? Any men besides that bloke you are crying to me before because he broke your heart." She said, reaching out for your hand as you sigh.

"I work at a local recording studio back home, I was kinda the assistant of the producers there and I got my own flat, my mother's staying there as I stay with Gwil here and...I don't have a boyfriend." You said as you laugh at yourself. You have felt that your life is okay, you have your job and bought your own place. But you can't stay alone for the rest of your life.

Your conversation with Gwil's nana goes on until the evening came. You and Gwilym helped her cooked dinner, and now you're eating dinner, sharing stories and laugh about the past. After that, Gwilym helped you in washing the dishes.

"I'm actually enjoying this trip so far, since I've met nana again for almost three years." You said to Gwil, handing him the plate as he dried it off and put it on the cabinet.

"I do too. I'm glad I pushed you to this trip because if I got alone here, it would be fucking boring." He chuckles and you rolled your eyes.

"Well, you have pushed me to do it even though I don't want to in the first place." You replied, still not looking at him as you continue washing the dishes.

"I would like to return the favor that you came with me here."

And now you're facing him, with a distinct smile on your face, "And what would you do Mr. Lee?." You taunt at him, scoffing afterwards when he's thinking of something that would return the favor.

Then something came in his mind, he knew this would be the worst thing ever to you. "What if I'll give you the orgasm you need as a friendly gesture?." He casually said and that made you suddenly swallow your own saliva and widen your eyes at him.

"Give me--what? Fucking say that again?." You stutter, not sure if you really heard that from him.

"Orgasm, since you haven't been laid for two whole years, I'll give you that as a friendly gesture." He said that again and you have felt your head spinning. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath.

"You wanted me...to have sex with you...as a friend?." You asked him and he smiles at you, nodding at your words. You dried up your hands and put them on your hips, still staring at Gwil if he's joking or not.

"Please tell me you're pranking the hell out of me again." You said. You wait for him to laugh his ass off at you for believing on his lies.

But he said, "I'm not kidding Y/N. Do you want me to give you the best orgasm or not?." He said that in conviction. You can't believe this is happening.

"You have a freaking girlfriend for Christ's sake! What's going on your mind Gwil?." You raised your voice at him and that gave him a start that you are agreeing with him.

"So you're agreeing on it? It's just between us, I'm doing that for you as a friend!." He said and you shake your head.

You wanted to, but doing it with Gwilym, it would be the most awkward moment of your whole damn life. "Fine but--"

"--I'm gonna give you the best orgasm Y/N, take note of that. That Kenny asshole would fuck himself." He said and you want to hide a laugh, but you failed miserably.

"I can't believe you made me laugh in dissing my ex-boyfriend, I mean...he's good in bed but he's just the worst thing ever when we broke up." You chuckled and he lits up a smile.

"Come here." He said and gave you a warm hug.

"That deal will be just between us. Nothing will happen after that thing, but fucking tell to Natalie. She'll chop your dick off and would kill me." You said and he looked down on you, since you're just little in his height, and gave you that cheeky smile.

"Sure do."

...

You woke up with the sun blaring inside the cabin. Today's the last day here in the summer cabin and he said that we'll do anything today. Do some outdoor activities and cook some barbeque. You haven't plan for today, so you just stayed here on this comfy bed for a few minutes. You finally stood up from the bed, fixed the sheets and decided to take a shower. You took your towel, made your way downstairs and to the bathroom. You open the door then suddenly screamed when you see Gwil showering inside, seeing him completely naked even though it's steamy around here.

You quickly turn around but you clumsily bumped on the titled wall as you turned around and slipped, your butt landing on the dampened floor, creating a loud thud.

"Oh god, my head." You groaned and touched your forehead. You really bumped that wall pretty hard, you feel like a lunatic that haven't seen a goddamn penis before.

"Fucking hell Y/N, are you alright? I should've locked the door..." He said but he's letting out a small laugh as you slap his bicep.

"Well you should lock the motherfucking door if you're showering dumbass! I didn't know you're in here! I fucking saw your--"

"--you saw my...?." He smirks. You just noticed him just wearing that towel around his waist and now he's teasing you again. Definitely blushing in front of him.

You scoffed and stood up from the floor, "Fuck off Gwil." You replied as you leave the bathroom, deciding that you should shower later.

"I can't believe you saw me naked." He said while chuckling. You rolled your eyes at him as you watch him got upstairs to change up. You got inside the kitchen, preparing some breakfast and cooking it. When you have finished cooking it, you set up the plates and see him enter the kitchen, looking at the breakfast you've made today. It just seems like nothing happened earlier.

"You're definitely a wife material Y/N. No lies." Gwil said as he eat his food. You smiled on his remark, eating down on your food too.

"Guess I am."

"What about our deal now missy? You thought I haven't remember it." He said, bringing up that forbidden topic you don't want to talk about. You agreed to him and he will forever remember that you've said yes.

When you're both done eating breakfast and just stayed silent right here, he coughed to get your attention. You've been overthinking on something that is silencing you, which is pretty odd.

"Y/N, I really want to return the favor and give you that orgasm. As I have mentioned, it's just in a friendly way." He said and you looked back at him.

"I can't believe I'm doing this but..." You said, standing up from the stool as you approached him, propping yourself between his legs. "Let's get this over with." You said.

Then you cupped his face, leaning in to kiss him. When the kiss lasted for seconds, you pull away from him, but he pull you in again as he kisses you, adding his tongue in. You open your mouth to let him tongue meet with yours. The heated making out really made your breathing erratic and your heart rate gets faster.

You both pull away again and now he also stood up from his seat and hold your hand, leading you up his room. You're getting nervous but excited because you're finally getting laid but it's just weird that your own bestfriend is gonna do the job. You watch him lie down on his bed, still fully clothed but you can see him through his jeans that he's hard. Something in you sparked when you see him hard.

"Why are you still standing there?." He asked, propping his elbows up to support his body in looking up at you from the edge of his bed.

"Oh! I was supposed to go there? You didn't fucking tell me." You startled and took your sandals off, then just sat on the edge.

"And why are you sitting at the edge?." He rolled his eyes and you tried to hide your enthusiasm in seeing him a bit pissed. So, you finally calm him down as you straddle his lap again and connect your lips once again.

"I can't stop kissing those lips. I never knew my best friend have nice lips." He smirks at you and pushed him on the bed. Disconnecting your lips again, looking down on his lips as well.

"You have nice ones too." You smirked at him then kissed him again. You have felt the power of you above him, his hands touching you everywhere then sets it on you butt, giving it a soft squeeze as you pull away from his lips and plant more kisses on his jaw and neck.

He then took your waists and switched your positions. He's now ontop of you, watching him take off his shirt. You also sat up and take off your top, you trail down your shorts but, "Hey hey, I should be the one that would take that off." He said and lay down between your legs.

You lay on the pillows as you wait for something to happen and also thinking that you fucking have your best friend between your legs, ready to give your pleasure and now you're here, letting the awkwardness and even insecurities eat you up. You can't imagine Gwilym to do this, but here you are.

When he pull down your shorts, lifting your hips up to help him to his work and now you're blushing hard. You're half naked in front of him.

"Are you fucking blushing Y/N?." His voice let you prop your elbows on the bed to look him over, even blushing hard to you just noticed him left on his underwear too. So you're both even.

"I can't help it! You're fucking...between my legs! It's just so unimaginable Gwil! You're my friend and it's--oh god--it's killing me." You stammered, but he just let out a chuckle then kisses the skin just above where you're sensitive right now. Fuck.

"It's just sex in a friendly way. Come on, I'll take your knickers off now." He said as you feel his fingers pulling down on the thin cloth covering your private area. But you suddenly gripped his biceps, causing him to stop on his tracks, looking at you as you are now sitting up on the bed.

"What? What's wrong?." He quickly asked, sitting up also as he cups your face. He have this worried look on his face, showing that he really cares about you and serious about this. Your tensed shoulders relaxed and your harsh breathings earlier slowed down.

"Just...be gentle. It's been two damn years." You stifled a laugh as he smirks at you, giving you a kiss on your forehead as he pushed your back on the bed. You lifted your hips again, letting him take off panties then his large hands spreads your legs apart, hearing him hum between your legs.

You watch him stuffed his middle and ring finger in his mouth, wetting them with his saliva before he inserted it in you. Causing you to let out a soft moan, feeling his fingers thrusting in and out of you was pleasurable. Since you're just touching yourself sometimes, your fingers are too small, but Gwil's fingers are immensely long and thicker than yours. That's why it's a damn euphoric sensation.

"You're goddamn tight, oh fuck--"

"--two goddamn years Lee, am I gonna fucking repeat it again?." You moaned out your words as he continues his rhythm. When you have felt the right spot as he perfectly hits it, your back arches as you let out a loud moan. "Ah fuck! That's it Gwil, fuuuuuck."

"Is that the spot? Hm?."

"Do it again."

He thrusts his fingers, curling it inside of you as he hits the spot again.

"Fuck! Fuck...that's feels good. Oh god." You whimper. He let you be worked up and ready for him as he still continue to finger-fuck you in a moderate pace. He repeats his actions, until you're feeling that you're close, making you grip on the sheets underneath you.

"Gwil--fuck...I'm close Gwilym!." You moaned again, your eyes rolling back in pleasure. You finally came around his fingers, beads of sweats rolling down the valley of your breasts as you see him licking his fingers that are inside you earlier.

"You taste good. Proud of you, finally got you an orgasm." He proudly smirked at you as you rolled your eyes.

"So...is it over? Since you gave me that orgasm?." You asked.

"No, it's not fucking done yet." He said then connects his lips to yours again, also tasting yourself on his lips, thinking that it's the hottest thing ever. You have felt his hands trail from your back as he unclasp your bra, pulling it off of you.

He changed the positions seconds later, he's now laying on the bed while you're straddling his lap. He have took off his boxers, feeling him hard inside your thighs. Your lips are still connected, hands going everywhere and moans being heard around the room. You both never got enough kissing each other, it's been your favorite from now on.

"Can I ride you?." You suddenly asked him as he stopped kissing you, growing more hard in what you've said. He didn't said a single word back to you, he just lean over to the nightstand beside the bed as he protrude a foil packet, yep, protection.

He rips it off with his teeth as you lean to the side to let the condom roll down his cock. You gave him a quick peck on his lips as you gripped on his cock, positioning him on your entrance. You took a large breath before sinking down on him, letting out a loud moan.

"Oh! Oh god...fuck..." You moaned, completely stilling with him inside of you. You are clenching around him as he felt it all, his eyes closing as he let out a soft moan also. You're still adjusting in his size until his hands came in contact on your butt, spanking it.

"Hey! No spanking!." You groaned and he chuckles, opening his eyes again.

"Move for me now. If you're still clenching like that, I think I can't last." He said. You bite down your lip as you raise your hips up, then sank down again. You did this in a slow pace at first, but when you have used on his size, you speed up.

"Fuck, that's right Y/N. Oh god." He groans, letting him grip on you hips then he meets your thrusts too, making you whimper when he thrusts in deep and hard.

Moments later, your legs are giving in riding him, so he pulled you close, your chests touching as he rolled over, switching positions again. Now he's on top, missionary style. Your legs around his hips as he continues to thrusts in you.

"Fucking...hell Gwil, you're gonna fucking kill me." You said in your gritted teeth. You're feeling the second orgasm again as you clawed his back, even gripping on his skin, but not too harshly, when you're edging. The sound of your skins slapping together makes it more sensual, and felt that euphoria again.

"Come on, cum for me again Y/N..." He said, adding pressure as he rubs your clit, your head throwing back against the pillows. You know you're getting there and when you're toes curl up, you know your orgasm takes over.

Gwil thrusts sloppily as he also emptied on the condom, completely tired and he's now laying on top of you. Both chests breathing heavily, when he looks up at you, he have this smile on his face. He looks tired, but still that good looking.

He takes the condom off, tying it as he throw it on the bin just beside the nightstand. He's still laying on top of you, sweats glistening and now the breathing slowed down.

"Hi." He said.

"Hi Gwil." You blushed.

"You're actually a good fuck huh." He teased again as you slapped his bicep, laughing under him.

"Shut the fuck up Gwil." You laughed.

#gwilym lee #gwilym x reader #gwilym lee imagine

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spiderneds · 6 years

Text

You’ll Catch Me (Peter Parker [TH] x Reader)

another short one written for @melonpanbread bc she deserves this after the week we have both had :-)))

this is lowkey inspired by spider-man ps4 but contains NO SPOILERS SO NO WORRIES!!!

Your normal job covering a museum grand opening was interrupted by half a dozen explosions. It knocked off a giant chunk of the wall; and you were on one of the very top floors.

You fell to the ground with the vibrations of the floor. When you looked up, people were scrambling to get up and flee to the staircase.

Instead of doing that, you grabbed your phone and dialed Peter’s number.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Pete,” you said. “Busy Spider-Man-ing?”

“Sure am,” he said. “Just your average car chase down by Midtown. Why?”

You swallowed. “‘Cause there may be a job for you-”

“At the museum opening?” he asked. “At the museum opening you’re covering?”

“That very one.” You bit your lip. “Look, there was, like, an explosion. A terrorist attack, maybe? I-I’m not sure...”

“Get out of there!”

“No, I, uh-”

“Everyone get down on the ground!” The scratch of metal against the floor made your ears ache. You turned around and gasped, seeing the four long tentacles that made up Doc Ock.

You only grew more in fear when you saw the rest of the team of Peter’s worse enemies trailing right in behind him. Kraven, Electro, Vulture, Sandman, and Mysterio.

Fearing they would recognize you, you ducked behind a display of old artifacts. You clutched the phone tight. “Peter?” you whispered into it. “The Sinister Six are here, and I’m thinking they’re looking for you.”

“Oh God,” he said suddenly. “They’re not looking for me. They’re looking for you.”

“What?” you whispered. “How?”

“Ock knows my secret identity now, you know that. And with it... he knows you, too. I bet he told the others. He’s going to use you against me. Oh man, oh man! I need to... I need to go. I’m on my way, okay?”

“They’re after me?” you asked. You waited for that to set some kind of fear in your bones, but it didn’t.

“Yes. I am so sorry, babe. I can’t - I can’t believe I put you in danger. I should have... I could have-”

You interrupted his rambling. “Is it weird that that makes me feel better? Like, they’re not going after you, so...”

“No! That is so weird. ___, you need to get out of there.”

“Okay,” you breathed. “I will. I can see the stairs from here.”

“Good. Go!” he whispered loudly.

“See you soon.”

You hung up and tucked your phone into the pocket of your jacket. People were on their knees, hands at the back of their heads. You started to sneak around them, ducking behind displays and shelves and underneath tables.

When the coast was clear, you started to crawl towards the staircase. Until-

Your phone slipped out of your pocket and the fell to the ground with a loud clank. Your body stiffened and your head snapped up, and you saw Doc Ock turn and look right at you.

You grabbed your phone, got up, and sprinted towards the stairs.

“There she is! Don’t let her get away!”

“Crap, crap, crap!” you muttered.

You skipped a couple of steps in between giant bounds up the stairs. You dialed Peter’s number without really looking. It was a skill you learned simply because you got yourself into trouble so often.

“I’m on my way!” Peter shouted once he answered the phone.

“And I’ve got Doc hot on my trail, so... how close are you, Pete?” You pushed opened the door to the roof and shut it behind you. You ran up to the ledge and hopped on.

“I don’t know, a couple of blocks away? Why? Wait - oh no, no, no, no! You are not jumping. You can’t do that to me!”

The door burst right off its hinges as Doc tore it off like it was nothing.

“Pete, time’s up. You better be there to catch me.” You looked down at the street below. It was so small. You were so high...

“I’m not there yet! Just wait a second!” he called.

“I don’t have a second.” With confidence, you said, “You’ll catch me.”

You had to do it. You jumped right off. You sucked in your scream that you so badly wanted to let out. The rush of falling hundreds of feet towards the road made your stomach completely leave your body. The air on your face hurt. But it didn’t last long, because Peter swung by, his arm around you.

You put your arms around him as soon as you swung upward. You looked up at his masked face and then back at the museum. “Aren’t you going to take care of that?” you asked.

“I will,” he said. “But first I am getting you home. You are absolutely crazy, you know.”

You grinned and kissed under his jaw. “And you are absolutely amazing.”

#you'll catch me #peter parker x reader #spider-man imagines #marvel imagines #mariah's work #spiderneds work

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finderskeepersff · 5 years

Text

10. Part 2

“I’ll see you in an hour, I’ll pick you up at your home” I said down the phone to Sofia “ok, don’t be late. See you soon” Sofia wants to go shopping to get Mia a birthday gift, like I don’t want to be out in those places. I am a mess, I know I am and compared to her I look not good. She won’t leave it, she won’t accept it when I said no. She said that Mia wants me to be there for the meal, I am uncomfortable with how I am right now but what can I do “see you soon” disconnecting the call as I walked up the steps to Myles apartment, I am happy with my decision. It hit me so hard when she said about Jordan, my heart was hurting too. I am just stuck between two things but I don’t regret with what I have chosen, I am happier with Sofia. It’s just trying to get rid of that life, and trying to stop this mess now. Knocking on the door, I need to escape this place, Brooklyn is not a place I should be even walking around in. I have people snitching on me, nobody likes me anyways but now I got my own people wanting me dead, I just need to remove myself from this place. The door opened finally “Eli” walking inside the apartment “I can’t believe you gone fat as fuck” nobody can, I do love my food. It’s either skinny or fat with me but I will lose this fat soon “Myles” dapping him “Kyle” I sat down on the couch “it’s been a while, nice to see we walking though. This unit, Lamar he got us out of what could have been jail for us” I don’t want to think about that night, it was a bad night.

Listening to them speak on revenge, speak on who to get “look, I ain’t here to plan shit. I just think y’all should scrap that shit and go back to the regular schedules, every time you all plan shit we lose money. This whole mess started off with Jordan but it’s done with, I want it gone. Kyle, what you did for me I thank you but this revenge don’t need to happen. They want us to hit back” I hope they can just accept it and move on “this all started because of Jordan, you wanted it to happen. You gave the hit out” shuffling off of the couch “and I am ending the shit, I have made enough money to jump ship but y’all my niggas. I ain’t going to be riding with y’all. I am going to be stepping back. I don’t want to die, I have shit to live for” the room fell awfully quiet “you becoming a father?” Kyle asked, shaking my head “I just don’t want my life being this anymore but like I said I will do shit but not front line, if you listen to me then everything will be fine. Just fuck them niggas and go back to what we did, if Jordan gets killed in jail then so be it. I am done with that nigga, y’all my friends and if you have a problem with it then I guess you going to have to suck my left nut, cause I don’t care” I doubt they going to say anything, I know they won’t “Cassius, you do what you need to do. We always riding for you, you can’t just step out though so you do need to keep your foot in this life” nodding my head “I appreciate it Kyle, this life was not what I expected and I am twenty nine and yes for the first time I got a girlfriend but the decision was made by myself. I will still deal with the money side of shit but I ain’t rolling with y’all like that at night, but if you listen to me on this then you know we can own most of the streets but we killed two of the main niggas, they scared of us. The snitches will expose themselves, only we will know the next movements” Kyle nodded his head “I got you” Myles added, this is all I wanted from them.

Parking up outside of Sofia’ home, I got a new car and I paid cash for it. It’s a brand Mercedes and then I am going to sell it, which will then filter the money I had, I have an idea. I will lose some of the money but I don’t mind it, I just needed to filter the blood money out, they was happy to take cash only so I didn’t care. Honking my horn at Sofia, I don’t know what she was looking for. She always looks so beautiful every time, even know. She is wearing a crop top, skirt with a slit at the side of it, she is wearing a body chain too. She got a fresh tan, she looks so beautiful and then there is me. I had to buy new clothes because they was tight on me, I need to do better. Sofia opened the car door “what is this? A new car?” she sat inside “yeah, just for a while. My other car is in for repair that is why” I lied, I don’t want to get into politics about the real reason “oohh, this is nice Cassius and look at you, you wearing a shirt and you tidied your hair” Sofia closed my car door “I just shaved the sides, I am still letting it grow out from the top” Sofia stroked my cheek “give me a kiss” turning to Sofia “you look so beautiful by the way” pressing a kiss to Sofia’ lips “thank you handsome, I like this shirt and I love your cheeks. You honestly make me happy, my chipmunk” rolling my eyes, she didn’t see me do it but she lowkey calling me fat all of the time.

Locking the car door, parking is a bitch around here this is why I don’t do shopping “you not wearing a bra?” I doubt she is “nope, why do I need to wear a bra. My boobs are covered, who cares” Sofia walked around the car and over to me “did I tell you how handsome you looked” she needs to wear a bra “you know wearing a bra would be a good idea? And I ain’t going to no meal, I will come here with you and then I am going home” Sofia eye balled me “you’re not doing this to me, you’re coming. Why are you being like this, just because you don’t feel confident that is on you. You’re fine, I love this look on you” Sofia pouted her lips at me, she grabbed my shirt “why are you making me sad for? I want to be with you and you know we never get that. My friends like you” Sofia looked up at me “please, stop making this weight an issue. It’s not an issue to me, I love it” I had to laugh “sure you do, let’s just go and shop” she a damn lie “I want to see you topless, I know you look so much more cute. You will get topless for this pussy” she ain’t shit “come on” holding my hand out to her “as you wish lover” she placed her hand in mine “Cassius, you don’t regret that you chose me right?” I smiled “nope” she is something else.

It’s hard work shopping with women, I ain’t do this ever with anyone. I don’t even date, like this shit is painful “you know what makes me love you even more and I know you love me” looking to the side of me at Sofia “how do you know?” what bright idea she got now “because you came shopping with me, you never had a girlfriend so that means you have never went shopping with any girl, you listened to me and came which makes me love you even more. Cassius you’re the cutest thing, you don’t understand” here she goes again with this cute business “why you playing me like that” I ain’t going to front but my cheeks are warming up “you mean so much to me” Sofia wrapped her arms around my arm and squealed “you’re so loveable” yanking my arm from her grip and placing my arm around her shoulders “you need to quit airing me out but I do understand how painful this shit is because y’all never make a decision” Sofia pressed a kiss to my arm “let’s go there, I want to see if I can buy Mia some jewellery” here we go, I was hoping we miss that section out. Turning off to the jewellery section in Macy’s “I think Mia will love a new bracelet” walking over to the desk, the store assistant walked over to us, a male that is “hi, how can I help you both? Engagement rings?” is this guy real, I blinked several times “what?” I said in shock, Sofia laughed “no, we are looking for something for my friend” Sofia spoke up, what made him even think of that unless he is just stupid.

Rubbing my eyes, this is tiring. How many things can she look at “I am just going to look at something there, I am sure I saw something I liked” I am drained, this is crazy. I cannot believe women are like this while shopping “how do you work here?” I asked, this is mental. He paused and then laughed “I don’t know, I just needed a side job while being at college. I mean it’s cool but my bad, I ain’t mean to like say engagement ring. I just assumed it when you both walked in, y’all seem really happy. I ain’t mean to scare, you looked very scared” I chuckled “it’s a lot, you ain’t know the half of it” looking behind me to check on what she is doing “I mean maybe one day” looking back at the assistant, he bit his bottom lip looking at Sofia “I would marry her” and then he looked at me “my bad” if this guy wasn’t so stupid I would beat his ass, leaning over on the glass cabinet “I think I like the bracelet” Sofia placed her arm on my shoulder “diamond tennis bracelet, can I take a look” I hope this is the one “I was thinking Cassius, if you keep this weight. So much to hold and I like it” she is trying to be funny “you like a fat guy then” Sofia grinned at me “maybe, but I love you” she is so cute, I smiled at her.

I am just glad to eat, it’s tiring “so you girls buy expensive gifts? Y’all must really love each other” they crazy “yes we do, they collectively bought me a Louis Vuitton bag. It was such a good day” so they do give expensive gifts “you know what is too late?” Sofia put the card in the envelope “I put your name in the card so you have to go” my mouth hung open “why are you like this” Sofia laughed “lick the envelope for me” she held it out “why did you do that? I didn’t even pay for it” she is annoying “because you are my man, you are my future so that is why” licking the envelope for her “mhmmm” closing the envelope “you’re too cute to be angry, look at that face” holding the card out to her “I ain’t angry, just a little judged. You know, I am ok with you but like I just don’t want to be there” Sofia shrugged “stop being so negative, it makes me sad. My friends like you, so why not” Sofia snatched the card from my hand “you make me so sad, all I want is you with me. It’s just a meal, I hate this whole set up, I never get to just spend time with you, Netflix and chill kind of thing” I understand her pain but what can we do “I know Sofia, there is a lot of things I got to do. While I am, I will think of something, I will move out so you don’t need too” I need to get this money back from the sale of this car and then I can use it, the money will be clean.

Picking up the shopping bags for Sofia, she is still applying lipgloss “thank you” she said to me, she placed her lipgloss in her bag and then got up from her seat, I feel like every man is staring at my girl “no more shopping right?” I need confirmation, placing my hand just on the crook of Sofia’ back as she walked by me to walk ahead “I am done now, but I have a little something I never gave you for your birthday. I was supposed to give it you at the cabin we never went too but I will give it you when we get in the car” I wonder what she has got me now, I feel a little insecure about Sofia now. Do I look like her cousin or some shit, every nigga just staring at her and I am just here. I am her fat cousin, am I that “come on” Sofia smiled at me, she grabbed my hand “you so slow at times” she interwined our fingers together “ain’t you like see all them guys stare at you?” I asked, I am confused “why would I care what they look at? My eyes are only for you” she shrugged, I couldn’t help but smile. She does really love me.

Getting into the drivers seat, after putting away Sofia’ shopping in the trunk “so handsome, I never was able to give you what I wanted. I even got you a card, I still have it” furrowing my eyebrows smiling “a card?” I said shocked with that “yes, I wrote you a card before it all happened but I hope you like it” she got the card and then a long box out of her bag “I hope you ain’t buy me anything expensive?” she held it out to me “I had the receipt so you know” I had to laugh “thank you babe, wow. My first card from my girlfriend” I am so excited about the card, it’s weird for me. Opening the envelope, pulling out the card. Looking at the front of the card “happy birthday to the best boyfriend ever” I read the front, I chuckled “I love it, this already means a lot to me, I ain’t ever get this kind of thing, it’s caring” opening the card “To Cassius my observer, happy birthday. You’re a step closer to thirty and I already can’t wait to celebrate it with you, you have saved me many of times but it’s something so natural to you. I can never thank you or do what you have done for me, saved my soul. You have given me a new meaning to life when I have had given up. Love your first girlfriend and last” I laughed at the card, that was deep “wow, that was nice Sofia. I honestly don’t know what I do, I am a very laid back guy. I don’t do much unless pushed, you haven’t ran away from me with what you know. No matter what I would always save you, you talk about meaning to life when you have given me a meaning too” closing the card, leaning over and pressing a kiss to her lips “I seem so cringe now, but whatever. Look at the gift now” placing the card on my lap and then opening the long box “I got you a bracelet too, all gold” I gasped “seriously? Why? I mean thank you so much but don’t do that Sofia, this is a lot of money. You work hard for it” that is crazy “I know but I wanted too, I honestly wanted to buy you it so don’t worry about the cost” she is amazing “seeing as I am the best girlfriend in the world will you now come with me to the meal?” I sighed out “fine, ok I will come with you” I can’t say no after this.

I knew I would get my way with Cassius, he is parking the car up so I told him I will walk inside the restaurant first “hi” I was going to ask the waiter but I saw my bitches all waving at me “never mind they are there” walking over to the table “long fucking time, look at you bitch. Tan on one hundred, you better have got me Rum, I love Barbados Rum” hugging Olivia “I got you all a bottle but I ain’t got it with me” moving onto Ivy “I am so glad to see you smiling girl” moving on to Mia “happy birthday bitch” I am just so happy “hello boys, nice to see you all again” walking around the table, pulling the chair out “where is Cassius? I haven’t seen him in months” Mia asked as I sat down “he is coming but before he comes, can y’all please not point out he’s gained weight, my handsome has gained a few pounds. He got into a little accident so he’s been at home for like three or four months now, he’s gained a little so if you can be nice to him. He’s a little sensitive about it” shuffling my chair in “there is my teddy bear” he looks so cute “wow! Is that really the nigga we met first time?” Lloyd said, side eyeing him “don’t make me come over there” the girls cooed out “we love a man with meat though, they all cute and shit. It’s been a while Cassius, welcome back to the group” Cassius smiled “I know, happy birthday” he placed the birthday gift bag on the table “you left this” smiling at him “good seeing you brother” Cassius went around to say hi to the boys, Mia placed her hand on her chest and poked her lower lip out “how cute is he” let him not hear that word cute.

Watching him get out my old phone from his pocket and then another phone, much newer phone “you using my old baby as a burner?” clearly he is “I just like having two phones” side eyeing him “sure, fool another person” I am not stupid “Cassius, shall we go out for a smoke” Mitch got up from his seat “uh yeah, sure” Cassius got up and so did the rest of them, I am glad they go. We can bitch about them “take your time” Ivy said, they can take their time “y’all had sex yet? With him being chunkier, I mean it makes no difference besides the slapping but I think it adds to the climax” Olivia ain’t shit “well no, we don’t have the place to just openly have sex. Either I am at home and he is at his own house. It’s a bit shit” Olivia looked at me in sadness “you poor thing, why don’t you come to mine after the club? Y’all can fuck in my spare room, I don’t care. I got you” Mia said “I don’t think he will go to a club, it was hard enough to make him come here. I just want to spend time with him, I lack it. I lack him, I don’t get enough of him. But bonus, I gave him a choice, I said to him you either choose that life or me, and he chose me but in a way I feel like he does something on the low. I feel like I need to move him out of Brooklyn, I have been thinking on that” looking towards the door to check if they was coming back in “wow, seriously? You think he will listen to you like that? I mean you both are moving at a rapid speed” smiling a little “we are but it feels right, and I do think he will but I would need to move too” Ivy pulled a face “move within New York area, somewhere close?” shaking my head at Ivy “but that is something future self will deal with, right now. I am just happy, he makes me feel so happy” my friends look ever so happy for me “then you work your shit and tell him he coming to the club with us, then you going to my crib and you getting some dick, in that order” Mia snapped her fingers at me.

I could have mentioned this so long ago, we have ate and on the verge of leaving and I have yet to say to him about it. Mia eye-balled me, I just know I have pushed it with him and he will just not want to go. Shuffling my chair to the side closer to Cassius, he automatically placed his arm behind my chair as I leaned into him “what are you doing after this?” let me see if he is doing anything “nothing, just that stupid little nigga at the crib. He be screaming the house down, you can tell that child is Jordan’ because he’s annoying. But I ain’t doing anything” that is a good start “ok, I am not going to guilt trip you into coming but I am going to go to the club with the girls. You can come if you would like” Cassius sniggered “what if I said you can’t go to the club? I mean I ain’t like that but you didn’t exactly mention it” he does have a point “sorry” now I look like the bad one “clubs around here ain’t shit” he won’t go then “Mia said we can use her place, we can just spend some time together?” I hope he says yes “that sounds more fun than that” now how the hell do I tell Mia then we won’t be going to the club.

#Chrianna #Chianna FF #Fanfiction

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kara-dolan · 6 years

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An Update on my life and writing lowkey a rant cause I am mad and stressed and just drained

So it’s been pretty crazy in my life with trying to get paperwork done so I can start GED classes and getting a job. On top of that since my little sister is becoming a cheerleader and no one but me is ever home I have to clean everything and be expected to do more than what I was told to do (which they don’t pay me and I’m my mothers child she’s suppose to take care of me so supplying a roof over my head is suppose to be expected especially by a parent) rarely anyone ever helps or does anything but once and then it’s thrown back onto me and it’s like the end of the world if I don’t get it all done (kinda like how it was when I was living with my dad just less emotional and verbal and mental abuse) Anywho I also have been trying to budget for moving to California but also have to remove $380 each and every month to pay for my moms gas and help with bills which she doesn’t have a job so I have to help pay even though I did what I needed to do (clean her desk so she can set up her computer so she can work from home cause she doesn’t want to leave the house for work but I ask for too much when I don’t want to work in fast food) so she could get a job so her douche ass bf would stop bitching. But in the time I want to move to California (11 months after I have a job) taking out $380 which all adds up to a little bit over $4,000 gone so I don’t have extra money to help support myself. Also even though I am in a program to help me get a job she and everyone else (in the house and her friends) “oh this place is hiring” Yeah they are hiring but it doesn’t mean they will hire me and they most likely are only accepting applications but not actually hiring. So any personal time I get I try to relax by watching a show or catching up on social media and my friends (even though I occasionally do both while cleaning) or I want to experiment with makeup cause lately I have been into that a lot. So writing hasn’t really been on my mind and if I opened up word I would write like 2 words then delete it and just trying to think of how I can write the next sentence to get to the place where I need it to be cause I know the end goal of what I want to happen but my mind is just stress stress stress and worry and then I get pulled away by more things getting added to my plate because now I have to go and take this form so I can get a bus pass so I can finish enrolling in the program because my mom will have a panic attack going to a certain side of town and I have no money to uber other wise I would so I also have to learn a bus route I can take so I can get there give them the form and attend orientation so then I can be on my way. I have so many things I want/need to do but I also need to be independent with it but I have so many people depending on me in my family and if I listed all of the contradicting and hypocritical shit everyone in my house says I think I would actually lose my mind. Like I’d love to be independent but I also need a car and a job for that but I need insurance for a car and I have no clue if car insurance has a free thing like health insurance which I also don’t have that. I would really love if a sugar daddy who doesn’t expect nudes or sex or anything sexual to just come in and be like talk and hang out with me and I will pay you like please cause I need to get my life together and no one in my family wants me to for real and it sucks but then they tell me I need to get my stuff together to move out but they don’t want to help.

#personal #little too personal but like its how I feel?#not dolan twins related #rant #sorry i just needed to type this out #any advice would help but please don't suggest jobs thats the last thing I need rn #like I met with a person yesterday and I am going to be researching the jobs they suggested today while working on cleaning #like I would have no problem cleaning if it wasn't just me doing things in the house but there is 4 people living here and only 1 (me)#2 ( my little sister) that clean #like it's all on us but if she throws a fit and doesn't want to do it she gets out of cleaning #okay I'm stopping before I go in further fuck hahaha

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markallenu · 6 years

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2017

It’s currently 9:46 PM and I’m sitting in my room writing this because I honestly just have a lot on my mind to spill and let out before this year ends because 2017 has probably been the definition of roller coaster for me in all aspects of my life. This year I experienced a handful of things. From new friends, to heartbreaks, graduating from college and saying goodbye to my life in Irvine, from being sexually assaulted and staying silent about it, to reaching a new emotional low I’ve never been at in my life, at times barely having money to pay my many countless bills to working 65 hours a week 7 days a week at two jobs that I had no time to myself, getting a new car but not having enough money to even pay for it, and now my student loans start next month yet I’m jobless once again. 2017 was definitely something, and I kind of wanted to share all the triumphs and tribulations with anyone who’s willing to read and reflect with me.

If I had to summarize 2017 in 3 words, I would probably describe it with: Depressing, tired, regret.

Depressing:

If you asked me a couple of years ago how 2017 was going to be for me, I would have described it with flying colors and that everything was going to be amazing. Little did I know that it was almost the complete opposite of what I wanted it to be. 2017 was an important year to me because I knew it was the year I was graduating from UCI. Neither of my parents had money to go to university so getting the opportunity to go through college was a reward in itself and a goal that I wanted to achieve for my parents. Overall it was a bittersweet feeling because as much as I was done with school, I was going to miss being around that college experience as I knew I had to move back to LA no matter what. What I didn’t know was that I was going to be bombarded with problems the second I came back. For a good 2 weeks I didn’t have a place to live and had to sleep on my mom’s room floor because while I was away our landlord rented out my room. For those who didn’t know, my living situation is that my mom and I rent out a place by room from a landlord and we pay for each room each month. For a year or so, my room was just a storage space for the things I couldn’t bring to Irvine and my space when I came to visit every so often, but eventually the landlord said she was losing money and eventually told my mom to clear my room for someone new to rent it out. We don’t have a home to ourselves so if I were to move back, there was no home for me to come back to after Irvine. I thought to myself, it shouldn’t be that bad, my Mom and I had a pretty close relationship so sharing a space was going to be easy. During this period of time, I’ve never experienced my mom yell and bash at me as much as she did. Being back home almost felt like hell because it honestly made me depressed that even my own mom didn’t want me around anymore. In spite of all of these events, coming back home was my first time experiencing the continuing feud between my divorced parents. During my 2nd year of college, my parents went through a divorce, but since I went to school, I was rarely ever around any of the problems going on at home on a daily basis. But being around such a toxic environment nearly everyday from the second I got home, it made me realize that life right now kind of sucked. I begged my mom to let me live alone separately because sleeping in the same room on the ground didn’t feel like a practical way of coming back and starting my adult life. The impracticality was one of the main reasons, but definitely because I was starting to get legitimately depressed, listening to my mom lecture me in a dark room until 1-2 AM, telling me about how I didn’t do enough and that I’m not going to be successful, always crying myself to sleep every night... Yeah, not how I expected graduating from college to be right? Right. Eventually I caused enough problems at home for my mom to agree to let me live apart and right there was when I felt like I was going to be able to start over. Little did I know that finding jobs and just adulting in general was going to be such a difficult thing. I went through at least 9 professional career interviews only to hear back from 2 from which both were just letting me know that I wasn’t good enough. The depression deepened, I started to isolate myself, completely removed myself from all my social media and eventually, everything and everyone from the outside world. I found myself laying in bed at times until 3-4 PM looking out of the window just hoping for it to be night time already so I can just go back to sleep. I stayed away from social media because it made me more depressed seeing my friends having fun while all I was able to do was sulk and feel sorry for myself. But ultimately, I stayed away because I didn’t want people to ask about me.. I didn’t want people to ask me things like “oh so what are you up to now?” “how have you been?” “how’s the post grad life?”. I didn’t want people to worry about me, and also, I didn’t want people to know that I was living my life like this.. It’s weird because looking back to the high school and college Mark, you’d be surprised at how introverted and socially awkward I’ve become these past few months. I pretty much said goodbye to social media for around 1-2 months to try and figure out life by myself, because comparing my lives to everyone around me made me sad and feel sorry for myself. I eventually slowly started to use social media and started talking to people little by little again, but definitely I don’t use it nearly as much as I used to. I hit such a low point in my life that it was honestly difficult even trying to convince myself that tomorrow was going to be a better day because my mind was too fixated on the idea that it would just suck as much as today did. Although I do feel much better now than I did a couple of months back, just thinking back to all the problems I faced and all the problems going on right now makes me depressed once in a while.

Tired:

Tiring quite frankly is an understatement of how much I’ve exerted myself both physically and mentally these past 6 months. When I think of the word tired the first thing that comes up is that I’m tired of worrying. There isn’t a day where I wake up and the first thing I think about was how much of a financial shithole my life has come to. As sad as it sounds, my family (aka my Mom and I) are not in a good financial state right now. My mom didn’t get approved for a pay increase this past year and my father has fully stopped all communication and financial help with us. Life was okay back then because my Dad had a stable job for a company that he’s been working at for nearly 25+ years. His pay is great and is definitely enough to sustain our middle class lives. But with my Dad fully leaving us, cutting contacts and all ties with my Mom and I, changing his number and moving to who knows where, being able to eat even 2 meals a day became a luxury. With my Mom and I living apart meant we had two different places we needed to pay rent for, our constant medical bills because my mom is diabetic and my surprise ER trip this year in May, bills bills bills, living, breathing, life has become such an expense that we can’t even afford. My mom works as an accountant for a pretty small company, but in retrospect makes 1/3 of what my Dad makes. To sustain not only herself but me on top of that, money has become a big problem these past few months. And with my difficulties trying to find a career focused job, I resorted to working random jobs honestly just so I can help out as much as I can. In the end of October I picked up a retail job at Target as a full-time sales floor and near mid-November I got hired as a desk assistant in a chiropractic clinic in k-town as a part time attendant. My sulking and being depressed eventually turned into working nearly 60 hours a week, 7 days a week just so I can help my mom out with the bills and payments. On average I got about 5-6 hours of sleep every night and had little time to go out and enjoy myself for even a couple of hours. My idea of fun eventually became being able to play a couple or two games of League before going to sleep. I was tired. Although I had two jobs while I was at UCI as well, I never experienced working full-time jobs the way I did these past couple of months. I had the thought in my head, “is this what adulting feels like, because it’s not fun.” But then I later realized, it ultimately sucks because of the situation my life specifically is in. I feel good that I’ve been able to help out my mom financially, but my mind and body has definitely taken a blow in return. I’ve been so busy trying to help that I haven’t been taking care of myself nearly at all. I found myself eating once a day, snacking on small bags of chips every so often to save money, making more instant noodles, cheap pasta dishes and shin ramen in the past 3 months than I ever did during my 4 years of college. To add onto that, I’ve been getting bloody noses nearly everyday, gotten lightheaded at work about 2-3 times, gotten the flu about twice and have been experiencing some colorectal symptoms again that lowkey worries me. (Side tldr: In late 2013 I had an ER trip where I learned I could be pre-cancerous because I had a huge stomach flu episode where they found inflammation in my lower secum. They thought I just had appendicitis at first, but I got my appendix removed back in 2009, so they weren’t entirely sure. I was later genetic tested in January 2014 where they found I carried a gene mutation common in colorectal cancer patients much like my 4 uncles on my mom’s side of the family, 2 of which died in 2010 and 2011 from colorectal cancer. Ever since then I had to always be cautious of things I eat and especially if I started to show symptoms again. Symptoms were things like nose bleeding excessively, coughing blood or rectally bleeding, etc. Which almost all of which, I started to experience again recently) Whenever I got home I felt tired, spent time relaxing by watching a couple of Youtube videos before I slept. Although it was hard I felt good that I was able to financially help my Mom. But even though it’s gotten better recently, I still don’t go days without worrying about my financial stability. My time at the chiropractor didn’t last long because I wasn’t what he was looking for the job and I feel like my time at Target is soon coming to a close because I actually only got hired as seasonal. Looking back at 2017, I’ve never pushed myself this much before and although it’s honestly hard, I need to keep telling myself that I need to keep living like this for the sake of me and for the sake of my Mom being able to financially sustain ourselves in these hard times.

Regret:

My first regret of 2017 would definitely be spending time sulking for the first half of the year over something that in the end turned out to be a waste of my time. I was depressed and sad nearly everyday for almost 5 months over someone that got over me in less than 3 days. I was honestly afraid of letting myself get vulnerable with someone again because I was afraid of getting hurt, but when I felt like it was safe and the feeling was right, it only lead to disappointment in the end anyways. Always being in the vicinity of each other because we had so many common friends was the worst feeling ever because you always wanted to play it off that you were fine when honestly you were not. It was hard to genuinely feel happy about a day because just the slightest thought of them kind of sucked you into your own depressing thoughts for the whole day. I’m actually happy to say that months later because I’m not around the UCI area anymore and because I’ve been so busy to even think about it, I’ve gotten so much better mentally from this experience, but it’s still a regret that I wasted my last 6 months of college feeling sorry for myself rather than just genuinely having fun. With graduation actually also brought in a whole wave of regrets that I started to think about. I regret not fixing ties with some friends I lost over stupid reasons over the past couple of years. I regret not doing better in college because I know I’m fully capable of being a good student, I honestly just never tried hard enough until it mattered. I regret being so wasteful of money during college and not being grateful of the financial support my Mom gave me during this time, and now that I’m back experiencing having to help out it’s made me realize how wasteful I am as a person. I regret for acting the way I did when it came to my personal life with people, leaving unresolved conflicts, and friendships that just will never be the same or are now nonexistent. And lastly I regret not being a better friend in general. I’ve grown to realize how self centered I lived the past 4 years of my life because if it didn’t benefit me in the end, it didn’t matter to me. My year of reflection ended up becoming a whole list of regrets of things that I can’t fix now and can only move on from and learn from it. I’ve lost touch with so many important people in my life because of how I’ve acted and it’s honestly disheartening to think back to it all. I mean I have friends still here, but it doesn’t undermine the people who were always there for me and I was too blind to realize it. All I did was hurt and break hearts that now that you regret what you did, there’s nothing to fix anymore because it’s already ruined. And for that I want to apologize for everything, to everyone I’ve hurt, to everyone I’ve ignored, to everyone I’ve taken advantage of, and to everyone who I wasn’t there for. I feel like these past 6 months of hardship has honestly changed my perspective of not only the world but myself as well. Lastly my biggest regret is a personal regret. I regret not pursuing my dreams and doing something I actually genuinely enjoy. I regret trying to please my family and not listening to mind for what I genuinely wanted to do. This past year I graduated with a BS in Pharmaceutical Sciences and sadly only 20% of me gets excited being able to say that. Don’t get me wrong, it’s always been a dream of mine since I was young to be in this field. I was that kid in first grade in Christian school that said he wanted to be a doctor while everyone else wanted to be princesses and actors. I always sought myself out to become a medical practitioner, but growing up and all my experiences that helped make me who I am today, I’m sad that my once dream I wish just stayed as a dream. Being able to graduate with this science degree doesn’t excite me as much as I thought it would that even to this day I still haven’t picked up my degree because it kind of doesn’t mean anything to me. (which lowkey I think I should get on that... rip) I regret not listening to my instincts beforehand and pursuing something that genuinely made me happy. If you didn’t know before, I actually have great interest in graphic design and communications and creative fields that encompass these skills. I did the stereotypical thing and listened to what my parents wanted me to pursue rather than doing myself a favor and speaking up for myself and letting me follow my own dream. I consider this as a 2017 regret because now I have a degree in something that I honestly don’t know what to do with. I regret putting myself through all that school for something that doesn’t interest me, and most importantly, I regret making my parents put me through all that school for me just to now shrug it off. I don’t know.... I’m honestly just a bundle of confused still when it comes to my career paths but I’m really hoping I can figure it out within the next few years. But for now, regret regret x100 regret.

Thankful:

If you’ve stuck through reading this for this long, I want to say thanks for sticking and listening to what’s on my mind. This post was a tad meant to be shared, but I mostly just wanted to spray out everything on my mind. So far I feel like I’ve only given room to speak about everything bad that’s happened in my life this year, but I do have to say that there were for sure good things that happened this year as well. Firstly I am thankful for my two mentees that I met this year, Cody and Toan. I first got acquainted with them early in January and seeing the development of our relationships this past year, I can’t be more thankful of two people who took care of me so much during my hard times. During my last two quarters at UCI, my life was a mess of everything, and I’m glad they were always there for me and stuck it through no matter what happened. And even moving back home home, they always check up on me and have even visited me just to see how I’m doing. They may be my mentees but I honestly feel like the mentee in this relationship. I want to thank speficially Raffy and Jon for giving me to opportunity to be on PACN board this year because being able to do PACN this year honestly helped me so much forget about the other stressors I had during my life at the time and put on a good show for everyone to enjoy. Even though PACN in general was stressful, it was probably the biggest highlight of my senior year at UCI. I’m thankful for the board I was able to work with, my suite members, my co-hoes, and thankful for the overall experience. I’m thankful for a girl named Theresa because out of all my littles, I feel like she was there for me during all my lows to always pump some motivation to keep moving forward with my life. It’s honestly really hard for me to communicate my problems with people because I have such a hard time talking about these sensitive types of topics, but for some reason everything feels so natural just being able to talk to her about it. Thanks for always being there through all my annoying messages and listening to all the stupid stories you probably didn’t care about. But thanks for making it seem like you did, it really helps lmao. Quick shoutout to Kevin (Hoang) too. Thank you for always being there for me, and being so persistent and trying your best to make me laugh. You’re honestly a genuine friend and I hope that I can repay you back for all you’ve done for me in the future. Back in October my long time car, ye ole 1995 Toyota T-100 finally reached its limit and broke down to the point where it was too expensive to fix it. I was nearly car-less for 2 weeks. It made it much harder to look for jobs and just get around in general. I was actually considering buying a tap-card because Metro fares were starting to stack up, until one day my Mom came home and surprised me with a new car. When she told me that she got a work bonus that week from her boss for completing a very hard project, she automatically wanted to put a down payment to give me the opportunity to drive a new car. She calls it my “late Graduation present” lmao. All my life, I’ve been driving around a car that was even older than me, so I’m thankful for my Mom for getting me a car that I can actually call mine. Even though I have to pay for the car payments myself (lmao, mom pls), I am still thankful that I have a way to get around now and this is probably one of my biggest highlights of the year. I also wanted to do a quick shout out to my best friends Kevin, Bea and Dia (and Alex too I guess). Kevin and I have been friends since high school but I feel like coming back home this year I’ve honestly gotten to appreciate Kevin so much more because he was there during all my low times and to hear all my annoying rants. Thank you for being there for me unconditionally, even though lowkey its always just because you need rides, lmao. But hey, I’m willing to take that trade for always being there for me. And also to Bea and Dia for always being there to help me realize that we’re still the stupid little shits we are even though we’re “adulting” now. Whenever we all hang out suddenly all my worries I forget them for even just a while which honestly is a comforting feeling. If either of you are reading this right now, then lmao yeah I kinda hide all my feelings when we hang out, but not on purpose though, but because I actually genuinely enjoy the times we do go out, so thank you for making my days more brighter even for just a couple of hours. Lastly, thank you Alex for always being a little shit, because even though we annoy each other all the time, being able to hang out or discord with you when we play league is always a fun time. You’re so bad at League that it actually brings me joy, which is nice. But it’s okay, I suck too, oh well. Thanks for always being down, and thanks for always replying to fast to everything. You’re probably one of my friends that replies the fastest and I appreciate that. Lastly I want to thank the friends I’ve made at Target these past couple of months. It’s kind of reminded me that even after college, it’s still possible to make friends with new people. I was so shy coming in but I’m glad I was able to open up to more people and that I can actually call most of you friends opposed to as just co-workers. Dr. Park at the chiro office was kind of harder to talk to, plus he got rid of me fast lmao, so thanks for always being the true homies and making shifts so much more fun. Shout out to my work best friend Kimberly for always being down to listen to my stories and for feeling comfortable to share your problems with me too. It’s comforting to know that there are people around you that even though they’re going through a lot of problems as well, they’re always willing to be there for you just as much as you are willing to be there for them. I’m definitely thankful for more people, but I just wanted to quickly mention the people who really changed this year for me and made me realize maybe life isn’t actually so bad. Things may be hard, life in general is depressing, but there’s always rays of light shining where you least expect it.

Oh hey well look at that, it’s 11:55PM now. With about 5 minutes left in 2017, I hope this is a fresh start for me. Here’s to a hopefully better year coming up, 2018. Thank you for all the lessons this year 2017. Happy New Year.

Wow that was tiring, to type lmao.

#temporary

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