perfect - an h.s one shot °•. ✿ .•°
PART ONE
word count: 2.5k
themes/triggers/tropes: fluff, angst, lime (do people even say that anymore), arguing, fake dating, relationship...fixing?
It’s been months. Months since that last call, and even longer since that last text. She couldn’t stop thinking of the way she ran her hands through his soft hair. Or the way his fingers traced her jawline when he rested his head in her lap. She hated to admit it, but she missed it.
Nova looked out her window, admiring the view of New York City from ten stories above ground. The Empire State Building could be seen in the distance. Manhattan was beautiful from the air, but looking down made her nauseous sometimes.
Most of the time, she kept glancing down at her phone, waiting for a notification. Not just from him, but from anyone. Her friends, her family, or even people she hadn’t spoken to in years that somehow still had her phone number. Yet, it stayed silent. No sign of life had come from her friends. She hadn’t spoken to anyone in a couple days. Some days, she liked it that way. But other days, like today, she missed them dearly.
She slid off the windowsill and made her way into her kitchen. Nova’s apartment had two rooms, so it was just across the way. Her bed and the bathroom connected from the living room and dining area. She didn’t spend as much time there as she should. The white marble cabinets glistened in the natural sunlight coming from the window. She opened the one above her and took down a box of cereal and a bowl. She liked her cereal dry. She knew she shouldn’t, but it didn’t matter. She sat down at the dining table and began to eat.
It was hard to swallow. Yes, she enjoys dry cereal, but her throat was tight. So were her eyes and her fingers. Nova hadn’t even realized how hard she was gripping the table. She knew she should be over him. It had been months. But she couldn’t stop staring at the empty chair across from her, imagining the perfect way his eyes lit up and the creases that formed near his cheeks when he smiled. She loved his dimples, getting deeper every time she tickled him. As all those memories came flooding back, she slammed her bowl every time she took a spoonful of cereal, She carefully reviewed each and every word she wanted to say to him as he was leaving, as well as the curses she screamed when the door shut for good. All that was left was the smell of his cologne on her sheets. It was impossible for her to sleep in them without thinking of the pain it brought her. All the mistakes she made that night, all of the horrible things she said without realizing. She wanted him back. That’s really all she needed to say.
Nova finished her breakfast and cleaned her dishes. The clouds slowly drifted away from the sun, revealing a beautiful blue sky and a perfect horizon. She looked down from her window to see groups of people cluttered together, walking down the sidewalks. She remembered the countless bags in her hands and the long credit card bills she received. It seemed to be a coping mechanism to get him off of her mind, but it didn’t work all the time. It brought back memories of all the money he spent on the clothes she didn’t deserve. They were deep in her closet, never to be worn again.
Speaking of clothing, she slipped on a light orange t-shirt and a pair of white pants. Her black and white sneakers were a bit tight around the toe, but comfortable overall. She locked up her apartment and made her way down to the street.
When Nova made her way out of her apartment building, she was instantly hit in the face with blaring heat. She felt a bead of sweat drip down her forehead as she started walking. This level of heat always gave her headaches if she wasn’t prepared. The light of the sun reflected off of the cars parked on the side of the road. Puddles were still on the curbs from the rainstorm a couple of nights before. Patches of grass poked out from the cracks in the sidewalk near the drains. All of these disfigurements made her realize not everything was perfect.
Nova headed down at least ten blocks before she got to Times Square. She made her way through the bustling crowds to get a clear view of the New Year’s Ball. However, a pit in her stomach grew as she remembered their New Year’s kiss. On the balcony of his apartment, the ball drop could be seen half a mile away. The spotlights were flashing, but so were cameras below them. The flashes reproduced, which caught their attention. He shrugged, gave the paparazzi the finger, and they headed back inside. They wouldn’t leave him alone.
For the longest time, she thought he would never leave her alone, but that wasn’t the case. She shook her head, telling herself to snap out of it. She had to get over him sooner or later.
The aura was beautiful. She craned her head to look at all the vibrant billboards giving off appealing flares of color. Pictures moved in unison, all across the Square. Then, she saw it. Him.
Harry Styles Love On Tour: New York City. September 21-23. Nova froze in her tracks, letting everyone walk around her. She didn’t care about the dirty looks she received, or the people brushing her shoulders to squeeze through. As quickly as the billboard came, it went. She hadn’t seen him in so long. She refused to look at pictures, watch interviews, read articles, or do anything that had to do with him.
Nova put her head down and kept walking, keeping an eye on her shoes. Out of her peripheral vision, she saw beat-down sneakers, luxurious Gucci boots, and blue flip-flops, but she glanced at her again. She bought these with her own money, not his.
As much as she didn’t want to think about the billboard, she couldn’t stop. His hair was slicked back with the perfect amount of gel. His casual mustache was gone, but his green eyes were sparkling. She thought of all the times he endearingly looked at her from across the room, waiting for a hug or a simple kiss on the forehead. When he wrapped his arms around her, pure bliss and red flush filled her cheeks. His chest was warm like a cushion. She would crane her neck up and rest her chin on his chest, getting a close look at his facial features. Some days, he decided not to shave, leaving small patches of extra hair on his jawline for her to trace her finger over. He moved his head around, squirming underneath her when his face was tickled. He’d pull her in for a kiss and she’d come closer to her. And that was only the beginning.
She had to keep going. Ahead of her was a long street connecting to Times Square, but only a few cars were parked next to the curb. She already needed time away from the bustling crowds, which usually didn’t happen.
No one recognized her. When the first dating rumors came out, her face could barely be seen, even though they were all after her. From the ground, the angle was strange. He was dressed in all black with his hands wrapped around her face, pulling her as close as possible. She was in a gray hoodie as small flakes of snow started piling in her hair. He pulled her hood up and smiled into the kiss, but then they spotted the cameras. After that, she didn’t remember much of what happened. Stories were released, which tore them apart. He was afraid they’d be after her, but they weren’t. She didn’t see many negative responses to the situation, but she knew there definitely were some. That’s what Harry didn’t want her to get caught up on. Then, they started falling apart, not just because of the rumors. They claimed they didn’t love each other as much as before. It broke her. Not just her heart, which she always thought was corny, but her physical health seemed to deteriorate. Sleep deprivation stabbed her like a knife, leaving her in terrible pain. That led to mental misconfigurations, cognition issues, and an overall pissy mood.
After a couple weeks, Nova could barely function. She refused to go out, claiming she was too tired. The city was too bright for her. Too many people to get in her way. Maybe someone would recognize her, pull her to the side, ask her about her ex-boyfriend, possibly even threaten her for “breaking his heart,” when in actuality, he broke hers. She still wasn’t sure what she did, but it didn’t seem to matter anymore.
She came to the end of the street, both mentally and literally. Her thoughts came to a stop and so did the rough pavement. It went back to being a smooth, cement road, like they decided that this street wouldn’t be paved. In this state, her thoughts of the breakup weren’t paved. They were bumpy and hard to make out. She didn’t have a clear idea of what happened, what caused it, or what she did wrong. What was so wrong with dating him? Other than the fact that they were constantly being followed, she didn’t see anything wrong. New Years was the only night they were ever seen together, then the news somehow suddenly broke out that they had split up.
Mentally, Nova slapped herself, telling her to stop thinking about it. It had been hours since she left the apartment and no other thoughts came to mind except her own mistakes. That stupid billboard didn’t help.
Her stomach grumbled, telling her it was ready to be fed again. Right down the road, there was a bagel shop. New York City famous bagels were something she craved for months at a time, even if she had them every day. As she neared the shop, she took a deep breath, taking in the crisp, burnt smell of the iconic bakery. She stepped inside and was taken aback by the beauty of her favorite shop. It wasn’t as crowded as it usually was on a Tuesday afternoon. She was just in time for brunch, possibly early lunch. She waved to the familiar man at the counter, who shot her a smile.
“Hey, Nova! What can I get for you? You want your regular?” This was the ideal time for his thick Brooklyn accent to shine.
“Yes, please,” Nova said. As her friend went in the back to place the order with the bakers, she looked around the shop, imagining the food was about to be receive. An everything bagel with ham, cheese, and pickles. She had a strange taste in food (no pun intended), but she didn’t mind. It was mostly unique combinations of healthy foods, but there were a lot of popular foods she didn’t like. She hadn’t eaten meat in a while because she went pescatarian a couple months ago…
Nova sat down at the table closest to the window and looked out at the street. People on both sides passed by quickly. She loved people watching. In airports, on subways or the bus, or at small shops like these. Her eyes scanned across the window, watching some people enter the bagel shop, watching some leave, or just watching some walk by. Her friend tapped her shoulder, making her direct her attention towards him and the basket of food he put down in front of her. She thanked him and began to eat.
This was a flavor she hadn’t had in a while. Smoked ham on a mildly spicy bagel, with a hint of sweetness from the cheese. It was perfect.
Another ring from the opening door filled the shop. Most people turned their heads like little kids in class whenever an unexpected visitor arrived. Nova was one of those children, poking her head up from her basket after saving a droplet of cheese from getting on her shirt. His hair was short and dark. He wore a blue and gray flannel and light blue jeans. His feet were protected by black and white Adidas sneakers. When he turned around after placing his order, she saw his face.
Niall.
She hadn’t seen him in so long. Did no one recognize him? They made eye contact and his blue eyes lit up. A smile spread across his face as he made his way over to her table.
“Nova?” She stood up and they joined together in a quick embrace. He sat down and leaned his arms up against the table. “It’s great to see you again. I almost didn’t recognize you!”
“I know,” she grinned, focusing on her food to make sure she’s eating slower and neater than before he walked in.
“How have you been?” He reached across and grabbed a lone piece of ham that fell from her sandwich and popped it into his mouth. She looked up at him and smiled, or at least tried to after hearing the question.
“I’ve been alright, thanks for asking,” her smile quickly faded and she took another bite of her sandwich. It was an irritated bite, knowing he’d ask more. He sighed and strung his fingers together.
“You’re not still thinking about him, are you?” he asked with a slight whisper. Nova swiftly looked up from her food again, getting a bit of a head rush. Her eyelids drooped, trying to regain her balance in her seat. She didn’t know how to respond. She knew he’d be upset if she told him, but if she lied, he’d know. With a slow shake of her head, she lied.
“No.”
Niall sighed again, “don’t lie to me, Nova. This is serious.”
She refused to answer.
“Nova,” he started, rubbing his temple with his calloused fingertips, “you still think about him, right?”
“Yeah, I do. A lot, actually,” she finished the last of her bagel and pushed the basket aside. She looked out the window again. She knew Niall wasn’t there to bother her, but it certainly was working. He was one of her best friends, but hadn’t spoken to him since breaking up with him.
“Why?” he simply asked. A mixed look of confusion spread across Nova’s face. Why? She didn’t know why. If she did, she’d probably tell him.
“I don’t know why. I just… do. I don’t know.”
“It’s been months–”
“I know it has. I don’t think I’m getting over him any time soon. I just,” she stopped her sentence abruptly to scratch her forehead and sigh, “I keep thinking about him. Everything reminds me of him. I can’t sleep because my bed is empty every night. I should be over him, I know, but I physically cannot.”
“Maybe you should get out of here, then. Live somewhere else for a while,” Niall suggested.
“Where? I don’t have anywhere else to go.”
“I’m having a party next week. Maybe you can come and stay at my place in L.A. for a bit,” his Irish accent was more prominent near the end of that sentence. Sometimes, his accent is hard to figure out, either what he’s saying or what accent it is.
“Seriously? You’d let me live with you?”
“Of course. You seem pressured to live here,” he said.
“I appreciate that,” Nova replied.
“Call me when you’re ready to go.”
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