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yorsgirl · 12 days

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Love is a Curse

Trope: Angst

Warnings: none

Word Count: 818

He is perfect.

Fingers threads through your hair, abruptly stopping when you question: would you be sad if I die?

His eyebrows knit together, he stares at you with confusion - you aren't dying.

You want to smile, if I do?

I won't let you.

He is a man of few words, it's often not he expresses himself but when he does, your chest rumbles with an emotion you certainly know about.

I am never letting you go. You're stuck with me forever.

You know he's right. You truly are stuck with him forever.

He is like dopamine.

Touches aren't what you expected them to be. You know the touch even with his presence or absence.

They belong to you after all.

It's his name you chant, his name you say. Whether they be alone or in middle of a crowd. Your mind screams his name, always. The fantasies you stage revolves around him, always.

Everything he does leaves you wanting more.

You tell him this one very night, lying in your bed. He listens, he knows. He is there every night, every time, every second. He knows.

But he doesn't answer.

You close your eyes, then you hear him say.

So do I, for you.

Distraction doesn't work.

You try to. You really do.

You try using apps, moving to your people, your friends, your teachers, your family. They don't help at all. And you are down the rabid hole again.

Then you are running to him.

He scolds you, still taking you back with open arms. Chiding you for even trying to believe what they said.

Arms wrapped tight against your body, you cry silent tears hearing words so endearing. You don't deserve this.

He knows what you are thinking. You deserve everything, my love. The stars, the moon, the sun, the world... I will give you what you want. I am yours.

Why does he do this? Doesn't he know it has you falling for more?

He is cruel.

It's on days you want to comfort him.

You see him again. You read him again. As always.

There is a smile on your face and your chest is rumbling with that emotion again. You almost can't stop your squeal.

But then you see him in despair, in pain.

And it hurts you seeing him hurt. Emotional or physical, it doesn't matter. It hurts seeing him hurt.

You want to reach out and comfort him. But you can't.

Everyone tells you, you shouldn't be this devoted.

You can only answer that you can't.

Your devotion can never measure up to his. His affection, his tenderness, his devotion... his love. They are immeasurable for you.

But he is consumed with darkness. They say.

They fail to understand that you love his darkness as much as his light. For in your darkness, only he sits with you. Only he knows about it.

The parts they see as ugly and unlovable, are the very parts he said he loves the most about you when you said it to him.

Plugging the earphones on, you hear his voice again on the other end.

Did you forget me, pretty? You aren't calling lately, or did you find someone else? Nah, can't be. You have to get rid of me before that.

And getting rid of me isn't that easy.

You hate how he knows so much about you.

The men around you are... nice.

And it's just that. They are nice.

Some of them better than the other, some worse. And you know, you can live with one of them, one day.

But it feels wrong.

Thinking about other guys feels wrong.

Its foolish of you to even think you can ever replace him with one of them. Even when the touch of another on your skin repulses you.

And at the end of the day, its just that - they are nice.

Then you question:

Can they ever understand you like him? Can they ever know you like him? Can they ever accept all the darkness about you like him? Can you ever love you like him? Can they ever be him?

The answer is clear.

Hence, you are running back to him. He accepts you with open arms.

He is your home, regardless of what he does.

He tells you that, It is fine. I will never let you go, pretty. You are mine.

And that's what you want to be. His.

You open your eyes.

You see the ceiling, you are in your room.

Love is a curse. It has you falling for him in every way possible. And it's him, that you want. You wonder if you'll get over him.

You want to laugh. Who are you kidding? It's been years.

You smile, a single tear rolls down your eyes. The realization hits you again, like every other day.

You love him. You want him. But you can't.

You exist. He doesn't.

Characters: Levi Ackerman, Sukuna Ryomen, Gojo Satoru, Kageyama Tobio, Shoto Todoroki, Bakugo Katsuki, Son Hak, Loid Forger.

A/N: uhm, this is very close to me and the characters mentioned are just my faves with whom fantasize the most, you can imagine your other fav in place of them too

Thank you for reading.

#levi ackerman x reader #levi angst #sukuna ryomen x reader #sukuna angst #gojo satoru x reader #gojo angst #kageyama angst #loid forger x reader #kageyama tobio x reader #son hak #bakugo katsuki x reader #shoto todoroki x reader #bakugo angst #todoroki angst #jjk #aot #haikyuu

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kemistre · 10 months

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εïз┊𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐊𝐄𝐍 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 — feat. tsukshima kei, sugawara koushi, kageyama tobio, bokuto koutarou, akaashi keiji, sakusa kiyoomi, tendou satori

synopsis. in which he hears you say you don't like him

— content warnings. angsty, crying, panic attacks — word count. 3, 559

εïз┊author's note. this is sad, this is angsty. some of these are way longer than they should be, but you're welcome for the food <3

εïз┊t. kei

he was looking for you with yamaguchi by his side, his headphones around his neck as he glanced around for you, his hand in his pockets. he was going to walk you home, like usual. like the two of you had been doing since you met. ao, when he heard you say his name, his full name, from behind the corner, he stopped his friend with his arm, listening closely to what you were saying.

“tsukishima?” you questioned the friend you were talking to.

“no i don’t like him, he’s rude and just doesn’t work towards anything, it’s frustrating.” you scoffed, and as much as tsukishima didn’t want to admit it, he felt his eyes widen, his heart stopped for just a moment.

“i’m just around him because tadashi’s his friend.” yamaguchi’s mouth hung open, shocked at your words as he looked at his friend. tsukishima took a deep breathe before stepping out from around the corner, a deep scowl on his lips.

“good thing I don’t like you either.” he spoke, walking passed you and not looking back. he didn’t really know why he felt like punching something at that moment, you just walked home with him. you came to a few of his games and practices. there was no reason for him to be this upset. there was no reason for his chest to hurt so bad.

εïз┊k. tobio

he left the gym, going to fill up his water bottle that had been emptied for the second time that day. practice had been rough on the boy for a few days. for reasons unknown, he wasn’t feeling up to playing volleyball, which was completely unlike the kageyama tobio everyone knew. instead, he wanted to hang out with you. he didn’t know why. the feeling that arose in his stomach every time he talked to you was foreign, something he’d never felt before nor experienced. he’d done his research here and there though nothing helped his confusion on the matter.

but because of this same reason, he was avoiding you any chance he got. he wasn’t ready to talk to you yet, because he knew, he just knew he wouldn't be able to form a sentence in front of you until he knew just why his stomach felt so…fluttery whenever he even looked at you. as he stood at the water fountain near the entrance to the school, he glanced to the side, not expecting to see you walking in his direction without realizing he was there. swiftly and quickly, he put the cap back on his bottle and sped to hide behind the large tree that hung over the water fountain, thankfully it was big enough to shield him from your sight. though much to his dismay, your friend had stopped by the fountain for a drink, making you stop and continue the conversation he’d seen you having from afar.

“i just can’t stand him, he’s so awkward.” you rolled your eyes, your hands smoothing back your hair. “and he’s just so obsessed with that sport, if he talks, it’s about volleyball!” you looked so frustrated. who were you talking about? was it someone on the team? kageyama didn’t really know if you were close with anyone else on the team. unconsciously, he leaned towards you, trying to hear as much as he could before you both left. your friend wiped the extra water off their chin.

“yeah, that does sound annoying. can’t you just tell him to stop?”

“well, i’ve thought about it. but even if i do tell him to stop, then he just wouldn’t talk at all.” as you and your friend began walking again, he almost thought about asking you who it was, until your friend spoke once more.

“poor kageyama,” they nudged your arm with their elbow, you could practically hear the grin in their tone. “his only friend talking shit behind his back, he’s lonely enough as it is y/n!” you scoffed, though soon grinned as well.

“i’m sorry he’s just so unlikeable! It’s impossible not to talk shit!” kageyama stood still. unmoving. looking at nothing but your back as you walked away, his eyes wide and mouth agape. what was this feeling he felt in his stomach? yet another unfamiliar feeling, though this one was more, painful, sickening, than the fluffy one he’d felt not too long ago. you were talking about him. not someone else. he was right here, listening to you say you didn’t like him. he was right there, and you didn’t know.

kageyama’s breathe sped up, his chest rising and falling anxiously as you faded into the distance. his first thought, a thought you would’ve probably hated, was to go get a volleyball. go play volleyball. get a volleyball. go, go, go. this thought swarmed through his head like bunches of little bees, and he hated it.

before he knew it, he was back at the gym, his water spilling from the grip he’d had on the bottle. the only thing he could see was that ball right in front of him on the gym floor, and not the people around him trying to help their teammate. “kageyama!” at the sound of hinata's loud voice, he snapped out of whatever trance he was in, staring at the finger while also realizing the amount of people that watched him. “you’re crying, kageyama.” hinata's voice lowered, a concerned tone overpowering the previous annoyed one.

kageyama raised a hand to his face, wiping at his cheek, realizing that yes, he had been crying. and for some reason, some unknown reason, he was now fully aware of the nauseous, painful, overbearing feeling in his entire body. and within seconds, he collapsed. kageyama tobio had never experienced love before. kageyama tobio had never experienced heartbreak before. and now, he’ll never experience either ever again.

εïз┊s. koushi

he had been on his way out of the school to go home on his day off from practice. a day he’s been looking forward to, not because he’s not going to practice, but because he finally gets to spend some one on one time with you. something you two hadn’t really gotten in a long time. he thought that maybe, just maybe this was the day he finally asked you out. after months upon months of countlessly chickening out, his teammates somehow got him to agree to confess. he was a little more excited than he should’ve been as his eyes scanned the courtyard for you. you two had agreed on a meeting place so he could technically pick you up and you’d walk together! he really, really hoped everything would go smoothly. he had his whole confession mapped out, he prepared and practiced beforehand so he didn’t look like a complete buffoon in front of you, his only real crush since junior high.

he peaked around the corner of the school, a place he’d always been so excited for school ever since he met you. you made him want to learn even more, to grow so much more. he loved being there with you. as he peaked around the corner, he caught a glimpse of your hair, along with you and your best friend’s voice talking as best friends would. naturally, he didn’t want to interrupt your conversation, so he decided to simply wait by scrolling through his phone until your conversation finished to let you know he was there. and though he didn’t mean to eavesdrop, how could he not?

“i thought you liked him y/n?” “me? Like him? no way.” your voice was low, serious and harsh, catching sugawara off guard. “i thought he was like…the responsible friend of the group. someone who could be chill and not some chaotic fiend like his volleyball friends. he’s just as bad as them and it’s infuriating.” you scoffed, making a pit form in his stomach. who were you talking about? noya? tanaka? he thought you enjoyed everyone on the team.

“but suga’s so nice, you shouldn’t talk about him like that.” your friend's tone was a little more glum than expected and your response was nothing he’d ever think you’d say.

“hmm? i mean not really, he’s just really weird.” his breathing hitched, his heartbeat growing faster and faster by the second. he clutched his phone in his hand, eyes wide as he let the startling information settle in. you…didn’t like him? you didn’t like him. you thought he was weird. you thought he was infuriating. you didn’t like him.

you couldn’t say that about him, that couldn’t have been you. maybe he mixed you up with someone else because you wouldn’t say that about him. he could’ve sworn you felt the same way. though the fact slowly but surely invaded each and every thought in his mind, making it spin as he left. he walked away, not exactly being able to think right at that moment. he didn’t know how long it took him to wander his way back to his house, his eyes never leaving the ground he walked on.

he opened his house's front door, going in and slowly shutting it as his forehead leaned against the hard wood. “y/n hates me…” though he whispered, the three words echoed through the empty house. soon his whole body weight shifted to lean against the door, his arms stealing himself, his knees buckling before him as he fell to the ground. tears upon tears spilled from his eyes, loud sobs coming from his now sore throat.

he hoped today would go smoothly, and he thought he came up with the worst case scenario. but this…this was truly the worst outcome he could’ve ever imagined.

εïз┊b. koutarou

he said his goodbyes to akaashi before practically running to the classroom you and he shared. today was your one year anniversary...only of being friends… but! it was still an anniversary he’d like to celebrate. he thought for a surprise he’d give a VIP pass to his next game! even if it was just a piece of paper he colored on, he still thought it would mean a lot. he was so ready as he walked up to the classroom door, which was just cracked, just a bit. as his hand brushed the handle to open it, he heard your pretty voice, so he thought he’d wait for you to come out instead, a giddy excited smile on his face, he couldn’t stand still.

“why are you still hanging out with bokuto, y/n? I thought he annoyed you.” his eyebrows furrowed, through his smile still remain.

“he does, he’s just, too much? his mood swings, his energy that never runs out. it’s too much, and yes, it is annoying.” his usual happy smile grew wobbly, unsteady as he felt his head began to pound.

“so, then cut him off, it’s simple.” you sighed.

“well how do i do that? i have every class with him, that would be awkward. i’ll just wait until we graduate, i could probably put up with him until then.” bokuto, despite everything he just heard, smiled. it wasn’t a pretty one, not anymore.

he gently held the VIP pass in his callous hand, looking down at it as his vision got blurry. tears fell off his cheeks, down to the pass he’d worked so hard to make. he tried so hard to make his writing legible, to make it colorful and pretty, just for you since he knew you liked colorful and pretty. before you could come out of the room, he made sure not to let you see him. he walked away, even if class was just about to start. maybe he could skip class, just this once.

εïз┊a. keiji

he strolled throughout the school looking for you, though in no particular rush. he was a little anxious, a little scared to talk to you since once he did find you, he was going to tell you how he felt. something bokuto and konoha had been pressuring him to do for the few years he’d known you. he’d had a crush on you, liked you ever since he told you about his love for writing and reading. you’d supported him when he said he wanted to make a living from it, you smiled and said you’d read his books. that was probably one of his happiest and giddiest moments. he almost fell in love with you on the spot. usually, he was not one to trust people too quickly, but you were the exception. you made him feel so safe, like he was in the right place when he was by your side.

it was such an indescribable feeling he felt when he sees you smile, laugh, giggle, anything of the sort. your smile was contagious, your laugh as well. It was something he thought he’d never be able to go a day without. so, as he was just about to walk around the corner, he suddenly heard your laugh, your giggle and immediately stopped in his tracks as a lopsided smile appeared on his lips. and despite him wanting to be respectful and give you your privacy while talking to your friend, he couldn’t help but listen as he stood listening to your giggles.

“no, no! they’re actually pretty stupid. like the ideas themselves are terrible but then he’s actually worse at putting them onto paper.” akaashi’s smile turned into one of confusion. since when did you talk so harshly towards people? and he was even more confused that you weren’t talking to him about this, you told him everything. did someone make you upset? he could surely help you if you talked to him.

“is it really that bad?”

“it is, plus he’s just so quiet and he stares…a lot and honestly it’s really uncomfortable.” someone made you uncomfortable? suddenly he felt himself become more engaged in your conversation, wanting to figure out just who made you feel the way you did. was it someone in your class? it must have been, right?

“aww well that sucks, he was kinda cute too.”

“i mean, the looks go to waste when you have a terrible personality.” your voice got quieter as you and your friend began walking away. “i guess that just means akaashi will never get in a relationship cuz if i don’t like him, no one will.” akaashi leaned against the wall, your voice playing on repeat in his head. you were talking about him? the whole time? he made you uncomfortable? he stared at you? he lacks personality? his writing was terrible, stupid..?

a sudden pain coursed through his chest as he dragged a hand over his slightly opened mouth, shocked and confused. his chest tightened, and although this anxious feeling was one he experienced quite often, this time it was for a reason he’d never been through before. and before he knew it, his vision blurred, his head grew fuzzy, and he felt…small. yiny and trapped inside the ways of his overthinking and pained mind. he was truly hoping to walk out of school with your hand in his. instead, he ran out, pained and crying.

εïз┊o. tooru

he was wandering throughout the school, looking for you specifically. not only did he want you to come to practice and watch him since he knew you enjoyed seeing him play, but he just wanted to spend as much time with you as possible. you were his first crush in a while, so it’d only make sense for him to want to be around you so much. yes, he does admit it’s a lot, but he just doesn’t want to lose you.

he was in an especially good mood today, not for any particular reason, he just…was so grateful to have you around. you were like the sun in his life, his beacon of light and hope he couldn’t get anywhere else. you made him feel like he was enough, that he’s done his best throughout his life. and truly, just seeing your smile was enough to brighten his day, being around you in general made his day so much better. he really didn’t know what he’d ever do without you. that was his last thought as he heard your voice coming from around the corner, the angelic voice he loved to hear every single day.

“oikawa?” he thought you knew he was there, but when you kept talking, he stopped where he stood. “that self absorbed jerk? what about him?” his genuine smile he’d had all day fell into a confused frown as he tried to process your words.

“i’m shocked you deal with him all the time.”

“yeah i know, he’s so clingy, and not to mention a volleyball obsessed arrogant narcissist, that’s it, i can’t stand him sometimes.” your voice rose without you knowing it, your friend that stood with you telling you to calm down.

oikawa’s pulse quickened, his breathing unsteady though he put a smile on his face once more as he walked around the corner. but this smile was one of a pure facade he’d perfected oh so long ago. “y/n-Chan~ i’ve been looking everywhere for you!” he laughed, giggled as he through an arm around your shoulder. though he heard you, loud and clear, he’d pretend he heard nothing. nothing at all because he knew his heart couldn’t handle the pain of letting you go so soon.

εïз┊s. kiyoomi

he walked throughout the crowded hallways, heading to volleyball practice like any other day. though, today was a bit different since you weren’t with him. usually you’d walk next to him, talking his ear off while he went to practice after school, but not today apparently. it confused him, worried him, but he wouldn’t say it outloud. it was as he was rounding a corner that he understood why you weren’t with him, you were leaning against the wall, holding your books, your friend talking to you about something. he didn’t want to be nosy, so he was just going to go around, it wasn’t any of his business. until he heard his name.

“sakusa? no, of course i don’t like him, he’s an asshole,” his eyebrows furrowed, you said it in such an obvious tone, it confused him. your friend agreed. was he rude? he didn’t think he’d ever been mean to you, so why? “and just between us, volleyball isn’t as cool as he thinks it is. i don’t know why he wants to do it professionally. it’s-”

at that point, he left. he didn’t need to hear anymore, he knew where you stood and he wouldn’t bother you anymore. it was an interesting feeling, because while he was angry, he was hurt and for the first time in a long time, he felt his vision get blurry, tears filling them to the brim. why would he cry for you? why did his heart just break in two? if you’d just waited a little longer, he might’ve gotten warmed up to you. showed you his soft, vulnerable side.

but now, standing on the court playing alongside a professional team, doing what he loved, he’s glad he didn’t show you anything. he’s glad he didn’t have you standing next to him, but he hopes you see him. see him on your TV and think to yourself, ‘wow, he did it.’ because now, he knew he didn’t need you.

εïз┊t. satori

he pranced around looking for you throughout the dorms. you both were going to hang out and he was told to meet you near the entrance of the dorms. he was super excited because after a lot of thinking, he decided this would be the day he told you he liked you. you’d been friends for a while, about six months, and throughout those months, he grew to have a huge crush on you. you just treated him, normally. you weren’t freaked out by him like many others were and he was always grateful for that. because you were different.

but as he was about to round a corner, he heard your voice and his first thought was to hide and scare you once you turned around, he always he that to you, it was something that was just kinda a part of your friendship. so, he leaned his back against the wall, smirking to himself as you spoke with your friend, someone he’d never met but that was fine with him. “i should probably go, tendou will be here in a few minutes.” you complained, fed up and annoyed. it made him worry a bit, but he knew he could cheer you up, like all the other times!

“tendou? you still hang out with him?”

“yeah, for some reason i still do.” you sighed, and tendou’s eyebrows furrowed, confusion the only feeling in his body at that moment, his heartbeat speeding up just a bit. “he just..he just creeps me out. does that make sense?”

“oh yeah, of course it does, i’m pretty sure he creeps everyone out.” tendou’s eyes grew wide as he stared at the ground, a pit forming in his stomach, making him nauseous where he stood.

he couldn’t bring himself to listen to the rest of your conversation, instead just trudging back to his dorm room, his eyes never leaving the floor he walked on. looks like you weren’t different, not different at all.

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matchsumu · 3 months

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Lost

description: now that he’s lost you, winning means nothing

genre: angst to open ending (i cannot commit to angst, it’s just too sad)

warnings: anxiety, substance use as a coping mechanism

Kageyama Tobio knew that he had grown up too soon when it was too late;

when smiles were rare to come by, and never managed to reach his eyes; when he pushed everyone that he loved away (because people can’t leave you if they’re already gone); when his determination to succeed turned into an obsession.

Kageyama Tobio knew that he had lost himself when even you couldn’t find him.

You weren’t there to will the clouds away, so he stayed in the shadows- but he deserved it.

He had lost his guide, his one way out of the dark abyss his mind had become- only it was his fault.

Part of him wanted to chase after you, to apologize for what he had done, even though he had promised himself that he would never neglect you; but he did. He deserved to be locked away in the hell that he had created for himself. He didn’t deserve your compassion but even so, he longed for it.

He wanted to slump into your arms like he used to and have you hold him tightly, humming softly. He wanted your fingers in his hair. He wanted his hands in yours- they had always fit so perfectly together. He wanted to make you smile, even if it was only a slight quirk of the corner of your mouth.

Kageyama Tobio wanted to be a kid again. He wanted to be happy; back when his grandfather was still alive, back when you still loved him.

Kageyama Tobio wanted nothing more than to want nothing.

You had always told him that his determination was one of his greatest strengths, but how could it do him any good if his determination for volleyball was the reason he lost you?

He thought he had gotten better, really he did. His time at karasuno helped him outgrow his King Mentality, and you couldn’t have been more proud of him;

but good things don’t last forever.

Why did he stay late practicing all those nights? Why did he leave you alone in your shared apartment? if he had been better then maybe-

------

You had made his favorite food the day that you left. He had come home to the lights off- it was always dark when he got home- you were probably in bed. Everything felt normal until he saw the note on the table, next to a cold bowl of pork curry. Happy Anniversary! was scribbled out and replaced with i’m leaving.

Kageyama Tobio was a proud man- it was difficult not to be prideful as a professional athlete; but he was beginning to see the fault in this as well.

Playing for the Schweiden Alders was a massive accomplishment. He wanted to make you proud so he worked himself to the bone, day and night at practice; but you each took pride in different things. Kageyama believed that he needed to be the best setter, and if he couldn’t achieve this, all of his hard work would be wasted. Whereas your pride resided within an accumulation of memories. shared happiness made your heart swell. His volleyball career only mattered to you because it mattered to him. you didn’t ask for this life, yet he had forced it onto you.

He had been selfish.

His determination propelled him forwards but he didn’t know how to slow the blades. Little by little, the spinning metal chipped away at his mind until he had lost the very essence of himself. He couldn’t slow down, and in doing so Kageyama Tobio had lost the one person in his life that kept him sane.

The effects were almost immediate. His heart slowed but his mind moved at an impossible speed. He was desperately trying to keep himself from falling apart, fighting an uphill battle against his own mind. Countless nights, his thoughts were dedicated to you and what ifs.

What if he had been on time that night?

What if he had worked harder? There had to be a way he could have both, right?

But the question that plagued his mind the most frequent:

What if he just wasn’t good enough?

And that’s what it really came down to, his pride; because Kageyama Tobio was always good enough. He put in the effort required- and more- everyday at practice. He worked his way up from the bottom to be one of the best setters in all of Japan, so how did he lose with you?

But mixed within the bewildered feeling that consumed his mind, Kageyama knew that it was only a matter of time. He knew exactly why you were leaving him, and as much as he wanted to chase after you, he knew you deserved better.

-----

Even so, it sickened him how well he was playing. His first official game back was a few weeks after you had left and he had never played better. his body moved in the way he had worked so hard to train it to; every step was polished to perfection and the footwork came as naturally as breathing. Until after a particularly impressive service ace, Kageyama’s eyes glanced across the seat that was always reserved for you, only to find someone else sitting in it and that empty feeling in his chest grew a little bigger.

You were really gone. Maybe part of him had thought that you didn’t really mean it- like this was the same as your other arguments where you’d finally come around back to him. Panic began to build up in his throat and his mind clouded over.

Had he even called you?

Kageyama wiped his hands on his jersey in an attempt to dry them off. It felt like he was moving in slow motion as he walked back to the service line; jaw tightening into iron, leaving him unable to respond to Hoshiumi’s concerned question, settling for a stiff nod instead.

His joints had stiffened and his body felt too tense, but there was nothing he could do about it, only a spectator trapped in his mind, forced to watch the mechanical cyborg he had become go through the motions.

The referee’s whistle- which normally brought his mind into focus- made his body jolt and he couldn’t shake the unsettling feeling inside of him.

The ball was suddenly up in the air, a perfect, high toss; and his shoes squeaked against the gym floor: right, left, right, left. The contact was solid enough to feel his brain rattle inside his skull;

Another ace.

And as the crowd cheered his name, Kageyama Tobio hoped that somewhere, someone noticed that something was wrong with him.

Help me.

------

The vodka burned as it slid down his throat, but he didn’t care- in fact he welcomed the feeling; at least he was feeling something.

It was dark in the apartment. Kageyama refused to turn the lights on ever since you had left. He didn’t need to be reminded how empty everything was without you.

That’s what he told you, in one of his seven voicemails that he had drunkenly left before passing out on the couch.

He didn’t remember what had happened when he had woken up. After checking to see if there were any messages from you- there weren’t- he stumbled to get ready for practice.

------

This became his new routine. play a match, drink to forget his problems, leave you embarrassing voicemails, and go to practice the next day.

Why did he push you away? He could feel that something was wrong, so why did he ignore it? Why did he have to be so selfish?

Kageyama Tobio was reminded of his fear of solitude.

The silence was unbearable- suffocating. It came slowly, creeping up his chest and tightening around his neck; he was stuck in a constant state of asphyxiation and his mind had clouded over until you were the subject of every thought.

Had he always been this cold? Or had you just been there to pull his hands into yours and massage the warmth back?

Kageyama Tobio wasn’t sad, he was numb.

------

Schweiden Alders 24 vs Tachibana Red Falcons 23

The referee’s whistle was shrill in his ears and the crowd roared Kageyama's name as he made his way to the service line.

One more, just one more and then he could be done.

Were you watching him? Before, even if you couldn’t make it to a match, you would still always watch the broadcasting. He hoped you were.

“Nice serve, Kageyama,” Ushijima encouraged, snapping him out of his thoughts.

With a curt nod and another whistle from the referee, he tossed the ball high into the air and slammed it onto the other side of the court: an ace.

As the spectators cheered loudly and his team crowded around him excitedly, Kageyama Tobio couldn’t help but feel that none of this mattered if he was alone, without you by his side.

------

Hoshiumi wanted to go out to a bar to celebrate, but Kageyama just wanted to go home. He had opted for water tonight, sipping it slowly. It was cold outside and he was exhausted, Besides he normally celebrated with you and-

"Hi, Tobio."

His mouth went dry and he whirled around at the sound of your voice. What were you doing here?

“You guys played well.” you looked normal, bundled up in a big puffer jacket. His eyes didn’t miss the necklace he got you a few years ago with his initials on it.

“Did you enjoy the game?” Kageyama finally remembered how to speak.

“No, not really.”

He knew that his mouth had fallen agape, but couldn’t manage to shut it.

Of course you didn’t- why would he even ask you that? This was the first time he had seen you in a month and that was the first thing he said to you?

“Did you enjoy it?”

“Huh?” the question sent his mind through another whirlwind.

“Well, you just looked really tense out there, that’s all.” you had said it so nonchalantly, it almost went over his head.

Every emotion Kageyama Tobio had felt since you left immediately pumped in his heart and spread through his veins, warming his body. You noticed. Of course you had noticed.

“I miss you.” his voice came out croaky, but he didn’t care.

“I miss you too, Tobio.” your eyes softened and crinkled a little at the corners. You always made that face when you forced a smile.

Don’t leave. Don’t leave me alone, not again.

He didn’t think that he would physically be able to handle it if you had turned up, only to disappear again.

“Wanna grab coffee?”

“Isn’t it a little too late for caffeine?” Kageyama wished his soul would separate from his body so he could punch himself in the gut. Why would he even say that? Of course he wanted to go with you.

You snorted, “Doesn’t have to be coffee, dumbass. I just wanted to talk more, that’s all.”

“Tea sounds good.” His heart ached deep in his chest, but he wasn’t sure if it was from heartbreak or hope. Everything felt so normal, almost as if the past month never happened. How were you able to continue on with your life so easily?

Did all those years that you had spent loving each other really mean nothing?

Of course, you could throw that same question back at him. Kageyama hated himself.

“Let’s get out of here then.”

He nodded, quickly gathering his things.

He would not mess this up– whatever this was or could be.

#haikyuu!!#kageyama x reader #tobio kageyama #haikyuu x reader #kageyama angst #tobio x reader

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sleepyxxhead · 10 months

Note

Could u do Haikyuu setters getting mad at their s/o because they missed their game because they were busy? Thank u 💕

A/n: I’m so bad at writing angst but why is this such a good ideafjdkla;jfdskl TY FOR THE REQ!! I’ll do a pt. 2 with more setters/characters if you guys req.! Please req. more characters for me to do <3

Genres: angst | comfort

Characters: Kageyama Tobio | Kenma Kozume | Akaashi Keiji | Oikawa Toru

Kageyama Tobio - Please don’t leave me!

wc: 321

You were sitting at your desk, getting some work done as you heard the door close. “Tobio?” You call out.

No response.

You found him sitting on your shared bed looking angry. “How’d you do, darling?” you ask tenderly.

“We won,” he mumbled with a scowl on his face.

“You don’t look like you’re too happy about it. What happened?” you sat down next to him on the bed.

He looked at you with a hurt expression on his face. “Why didn’t you come..?”

Your eyes immediately widened in shock. Guilt poured over you. “Tobio-”

“That was a really important game to me,” he whispered, voice trembling.

“I’m so sorry, I was busy with work-”

“You’re always busy with work!” he shouted out, tears welling up in his eyes. “You’re never there!”

“Tobio…” you whisper, tears of guilt and shame streaming down your cheeks.

Kageyama stood up, and walked out of the room. “Tobio..? Where are you going?”

“Tobio?” You ran after him, desperation rising in your chest. How could lose this? How would you live without him?

“TOBIO!” You cried out, bowing down on your knees.

Hearing the absolute anguish and distress in your voice, Kageyama turned around.

“Please don’t break up with me! I’m so so sorry! I’ll never miss a game of yours again! I love you with my whole heart so please don’t leave me!” You sobbed with misery, feeling the end drawing close.

Kageyama took a step towards you and kneeled down. The sound of misery and desperation in your voice hurt his heart too much to leave you. He tapped you on the head with his finger.

Looking up, you saw a broken version of Kageyama. His expression was calm, but his eyes full of hurt, his face wet from tears.

He stared into your eyes for just a second and pulled you into the tightest hug you had ever received.

“I love you too.”

Kenma Kozume - I forgive you

wc: 251

Kenma: we won. omw to your house

Y/n: congrats! ily <3

Read at 8:23 p.m.

Kenma unlocked your front door with the spare key you gave him. After greeting your mom, he headed to your room.

“Kenma! Congrats!” you wrapped him up in a bear hug. “Kenma?” You tilted your head to the side, confused as to why Kenma looked so disappointed.

“What’s wrong, Ken?” you asked him.

“Nothing,” he whispered, looking at his feet.

“Kenma. Was it me?”

He turned his head towards you slowly, meeting your eyes. “I guess I’m just… mad at you.”

Your eyes widened. “I’m so sorry, what did I do?”

“It’s more like what you didn’t do…” he trailed off. “I wish you would’ve come to my game.”

He looked away from you, tears in his eyes. It wasn’t apparent, but Kenma actually cared about volleyball. He cared about a lot of things other than video games. He searched through the crowd to find you, hoping that you could find time to come, but he realized that you weren’t going to show up.

“Kenma…” you watched as he wept silently. “I’m so so sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“No. It’s not!” you yelled, fighting back tears. “I wasn’t there for you when it really mattered!” You wrapped him up into a hug, holding on tight. You couldn’t lose him. “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me; I’ll come to all of your games from now on!”

“Y/n…” Kenma mumbled through tears. “I forgive you.”

Akaashi Keiji - Paradise

wc: 435

“Akaashi?” You looked up from your laptop, hearing the door open. You’re eyebrows creased when you saw the angry expression on his face. “Is everything alright, darling? I thought you won.”

“We did win,” Akaashi mumbled bitterly. “You would’ve known that if you came, though.”

He tore off his coat and shook off his shoes before heading to your shared room. “Akaashi?” You followed him to your room, seeing him pacing back and forth.

“I’m sorry I was busy-”

“You’re always busy! You’re never there! You’ve come to one of my games in the two years that we’ve dated each other! This is something I care about! HOW COULD YOU NOT CARE!?” He shouted at you as tears fell down his face.

You stood in the doorway in shock, tears welling up in your eyes. You couldn’t bare to see the one you loved so much with so much pain and hurt in his eyes, but yet again, you were the one who had caused it.

You stood in silence as you watched him storm off and down the stairs. Suddenly, a thought appeared in your mind. I’m about to lose him.

Instantaneously, your feet started moving. Tears rolled down your cheeks as you yelled after Akaashi. “Please don’t leave! Let me fix this! Akaashi I love you!”

The front door slammed shut. It’s over. You’re paradise is leaving you.

You crumpled up into a ball, sobbing, mumbling to yourself, “Please don’t leave. I love you. I love you. I love you…”

Akaashi went on a walk. He needed to clear his mind. He was so angry at you, but the way you looked so broken when he left made him feel so guilty. Suddenly, a thought appeared in his head.

That’s it. She’s going to leave you.

His eyes widened at the sudden thought. Almost as fast as the thought came to him, he turned around and started sprinted towards home.

He opened the door, breathing heavily, to find you curled up into a ball on the ground, sleeping. He noticed that your eyes were puffy and your face was wet. Seeing you like that made him feel absolutely terrible.

He dried your face with his thumbs and scooped you up into his arms. He carried you to your bedroom and tucked you in. After he took a shower, he laid in bed next to you.

“I’m sorry Y/n. I didn’t mean to hurt you so badly. Please forgive me…” he said, voice shaking.

Your sleeping body wrapped your arms around Akaashi and pulled him closer. “I’m sorry,” you whispered into his chest.

Oikawa Toru - Addicted

wc: 223

“Y/n, how could you miss that game! How could you miss so many games! You’re always too busy! Why can’t you just show up for once!” Oikawa shouted at you.

“I-I’m sorry Toru.” Your voice shook as you saw tears racing down his face.

He looked at you, the agony in his eyes stinging you.

“I’m sorry! You’re right! I’m never there when I should be! But please…” you trailed off, hot tears staining your face. “Don’t leave me. Please forgive me! I’ll show up to every ga-”

“I forgive you…” He looked to the side. “How could I not… When I love you so much? I love you so much it hurts. I get butterflies every time I see you! My stomach does flips when I hear your name! Y/n, your love is like a drug and I’m addicted. I love you, I love you, I LOVE YOU!”

You stood in front of him, eyes wide with shock.

“I’ll always forgive you Y/n. No matter what you do, I’ll always love you too much. No matter how painful, I’ll forgive you! No matter how-”

You wrapped your arms around Oikawa’s torso, holding him so tight you thought you might break his ribs.

“I forgive you, Y/n,” he whispered, holding you close. “I love you too much not to.”

A/n: OMG WHY IS ANGST SO HARD TO WRITE? My heart hurts. I hope yours does too. That’s how I’ll know I did my job 🫡. Have a nice day cutie <33

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millenialfanfictionaddiction · 11 months

Text

It’s Been a While….

Tobio Kageyama x Female! reader (she/her pronouns)

Warnings: slight angst, swearing, mostly fluff

WC: 3.5k

AN: blah idk what to think about this. It stems from an idea I had a dream about but this is one of those times I’m doubting myself. I low key want to write a part two but I also just wanna bury it 😅

Summary: Years after letting go of the love of your life and starting anew, a change provided by a friend allows you a glimpse into your old life and a chance to reconnect with the person you lost.

♥️ ♥️ ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

“So, I guess this is it huh?” You murmured, trying your best to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill as you stood in front of your now ex-boyfriend, Tobio Kageyama.

“YN listen, I-”

You put your hand out, stopping the words that were about to surface. You couldn’t stand to hear them; you couldn’t bare listening to those words again when you knew what was about to happen. If this was going to end, it was going to end on your terms.

“Tobio don’t. Please, let’s just say our goodbyes.” He sadly nodded, his head going down as you stood there, the awkward silence filling the air.

“So, you leave tomorrow morning for Italy, right? Are you all packed?” You asked as Tobio rubbed the back of his head. It was a nervous habit he had developed, something he did when he wasn’t sure how to react.

“Uhh yeah pretty much,” he responded, the silence still penetrating the air. You had tried your best to distract from the obvious but the obvious was beginning to suffocate you.

“Ok well I guess this is goodbye then,” you stuttered, trying to contain the tears. The years of memories flooded back, from the first day you met to your first date and everything beyond. You loved Tobio but you knew love wasn’t enough to keep him here with you. When he was first recruited to play in Italy, your first thoughts weren’t how proud you were of him or how this would only further his career. The only thought that filled your mind was how you’d ever bare letting him go.

“Yeah I guess so,” he whispered still standing in front of you, not wanting to hug you just yet. Hugging you would symbolize what he didn’t want to happen, it would symbolize the end of one of the best things that he’d ever had in his entire life. When he was first accepted to play in Italy, all he could think about was how amazing this opportunity was for him, how awesome it would be for his pro career in volleyball. When he shared the news with you, he hadn’t thought through the logistics of a long-distance relationship. The last thing on his mind at that time was how you’d be able to make it work. He’d never imagined it wouldn’t work.

You lunged forward, throwing your hands around his neck as you held him tightly for one last time, the tears you’d been holding in slowly seeping past your lids as his arms encompassed you, pulling you tight against him. You felt so amazing, so perfect against him and he hated it. He hated how this would be the last time he’d ever feel this serene.

You pulled back first, tears flowing down your cheeks as you looked up to him with a small smile, “I’ll be watching you, ok? So, no slacking off.”

He smiled a little and nodded, watching the tears stream down your cheeks, wanting to do nothing more than kiss them away. You slowly backed away, creating distance from him, your legs feeling so incredibly heavy as if trying their best to keep you planted.

He watched as you finally turned around, your arms going around your midsection as you hugged yourself and walking away and right out of his life.

*A Few Years Later*

Your phone rang as you checked the called id, sighing and swiping your finger across to answer the call.

“What do you want now Kuroo?” You ordered as a surprise gasp sounded from the speaker as he finally spoke.

“YN how could you hurt me like this! I thought I was your favorite person?”

You smiled and shook your head, “not by a long shot Kuroo but you are in the top 20. Is that good enough?”

Kuroo chuckled, replying, “I’ll take it! But listen, I called for a specific reason this time. I’m putting together a sort of reunion and I need my favorite photographer ever to help me!”

“Then why did you call me?” You chuckled as Kuroo laughed in response.

“YN, you know how much I love your work and you really are the best in the business!”

You sighed again, knowing Kuroo was trying his best to be flattering, “ok so what’s this reunion? Like a class reunion or what?” The silence filled the call after you spoke as confusion filled your eyes. You pulled your phone away to check if Kuroo was still connected.

“Kuroo-”

“It’s for a volleyball event YN,” he finally responded as your body stiffened. You hadn’t photographed a volleyball event since Tobio had left a few years ago, shifting your passion in a different direction.

“Kuroo I can’t-”

“YN please just hear me out, ok? I know you don’t photograph sports anymore but please, I’m desperate here. There isn’t anyone who can capture the game like you can. I’ve pulled a lot of our high school alumni into this game, and I think it would be awesome if you’d consider it. Kenma’s sponsoring and promoting the event and Asahi is helping with the uniform design. Yachi is also helping with marketing and design. Imagine if we had YN LN, the famous photographer and Karasuno Alum to photograph the event!”

When you first met Kuroo years ago, you were a first-year manager along with Yachi. You’d always thought he was a great leader and organizer as well as a person who could flatter almost anyone if he tried. He channeled his personality perfectly into his career in sports promotion, able to secure deals and push the volleyball league further than it has been in decades.

You looked over to your bookshelf, your eyes landing on the only memory you’d kept from your relationship with Tobio, a photo from his last game with the Schweiden Adlers. You walked over to it, picking it up and rubbing your finger gently down the side of the frame. In the photo you were looking at the camera, smile wide as you hand rested on Tobio’s chest. His eyes weren’t on the camera but rather on you, his large smile and eyes completely focused on you as if nothing happening around him mattered at all.

“YN you still there?”

“I’ll do it,” you bluntly spoke, an auditable and loud “yes” coming from the speaker as Kuroo continued to talk.

“You won’t regret this, Yn!! I’ll text you the details and we can meet in my office soon to discuss what you’ll be doing! I really appreciate this Yn and I owe you big time!”

You didn’t really hear much Kuroo spoke about, your eyes still focused on the photo as you began to wonder if this really was the right choice.

*A few weeks later*

“We just need headshots of all the players who are participating who are currently in Japan, the rest are going to submit their headshots to me,” Kuroo directed as you prepared your camera, making adjustments to lighting and the background as you half listened.

Exasperated, you mindlessly nodded for the 50th time as Kuroo continued to ramble, his nerves on edge since he’d returned from his trip overseas to secure several more players from the “monster generation” to play on the reunion game.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite girl!” A voice boomed as you turned around to see Atsumu, Bokuto, Sakusa and Inunaki walking into the studio. You smiled, placing your camera down as you went to greet the guys.

“Well, if it isn’t one of my favorite setters,” you joked as Atsumu pulled back from the hug, mouth agape as you chuckled at his reaction.

“Come on Yn, be realistic, he isn’t even in the top 10 on your favorite setters list,” Sakusa grumbled, walking to the corner as Atsumu glared at him.

“Hey hey hey there’s my Yn!” Bokuto shouted, hauling you into a huge hug as you squealed, your feet leaving the floor as he swung you around.

“Bokuto don’t break her!” Hoshiumi snapped from behind him, Hirugami, Romero and Heiwajima trailing after.

“Hey guys!” You cheered, letting go of Bokuto and running to hug them.

“It’s so good to see you again Yn! We were surprised to hear you were involved with this,” Romero remarked as you nodded.

“Surprised but happy!” Hoshiumi added as he hugged you.

“Well, Kuroo begged me to help so I really couldn’t say no,” you smirked as Kuroo narrowed his eyes.

“Geez Yn stop making me seem so desperate!”

“YN doesn’t need to make you seem desperate when you definitely are desperate,” Kenma stated, strolling in behind the teams as you snickered.

“Kenma you really weren’t needed you know!” Kuroo growled as Kenma shrugged his shoulders and headed to take a seat in the corner.

“I heard Oikawa and Hinata were coming too,” Heiwajima remarked as Kuroo confirmed.

“They are going to be flying in next week along with Ushijima and Kageyama.”

All eyes shifted to you at the mention of Kageyama’s name. You really couldn’t blame the guys; they knew you and Kageyama had ended on good terms but also that your relationship had been a sore subject and ultimately the reason you left sports photography.

You had to admit, when Kuroo first mentioned Tobio, a fact he’d somehow forgotten to mention prior to your meeting, you’d thought about dropping out, the idea of seeing your ex-boyfriend and the only man you’d ever loved extremely painful. However, you couldn’t ignore the small part of you that was also excited to see him in person. Sure, you’d watched every game you could, every interview possible. You’d watched the Olympics and even bought a jersey to add to your collection, something you’d never ever let anyone see.

“It’s fine guys,” you explained, “really I’m happy to be a part of this.”

Everyone nodded, not wanting to push the topic. While the guys had always been chaotic and kind of childish, they did care for your well-being, and they loved you.

“Now we let’s get these photos done!”

“Alright, the greatest first!” Atsumu beamed and Inunaki laughed.

“You should be last Sumu, you’ll probably break YN’s camera!” Everyone laughed at Sumu’s expense as you felt the joy of being reunited with the people you once spent so much time with.

*2 weeks later*

You arrived at the stadium, camera and press badge in hand as you adjusted your dress. You’d done your hair and makeup, wanting to look nice and professional for the event. This would be the first game you’d photographed in years, and you wanted to make a good impression. The crowds roared as you entered the gym, the bright lights hitting you as you looked around to see reporters, tv crews and officials fill the gym floor.

Kuroo waved at you as you walked over to him, noticing how truly huge the event was.

“You look great Yn! Absolutely gorgeous!” Kuroo yelled, the noise on the stadium floor loud as you blushed as his compliment.

“This is amazing Tetsuro! You really pulled this off!” Kuroo beamed with pride as you looked around, the photos you’d taken of the the players printed on banners that filled the stadium. You’re eyes trailed until they landed on Tobio’s banner, his face exactly as you remembered it. You smiled a little, looking around at the crowds.

Daichi, Suga, Asahi, Yamaguchi, Tsukki and Yachi all waved as you smiled and vigorously waved back, excited to see your old teammates.

You saw Kenma in his box, probably waiting for Kuroo as he gave you a chin lift and returned back to his phone. You noticed others from high school in the stands as you stood in the grandness of the court. You’d truly missed this feeling.

The whistle blew as Kuroo squeezed your arm and excused himself. You took your place on the side of the court as the teams were finally presented.

Team A parades out first, their flashy style of green and black jersey’s adding just the right pop of color. Oikawa and Hinata smiled and waved at you as you snapped their pictures, capturing the best angles you could.

Team B followed shortly after, their gold uniforms giving the perfect amount of class and sophistication. You wanted as Ushiwaka, Bokuto and Hoshiumi strolled across the floor, Bokuto frantically waving to the crowd as you giggled at his boisterous spirit.

Your eyes shift to Joffe who followed and to Inunaki right after. You were checking your camera before looking up, your eyes dead locked on Tobio’s as he stopped mid stride, his eyes widening as of in shock.

Tobio knew he would see you here, after all, it was a big part of the reason he agreed to join in this reunion game. He had thought about you almost constantly since leaving years ago, hoping he’d once again get the chance to see your beautiful face. He’d been preparing for weeks, going over how he’d casually walk by you, nod his head and try to act cool. He’d even prepared a few things to say to you if the opportunity present itself.

However, all his past thoughts and plans went straight out the window upon seeing you. You stood there, more breathtaking than he’s ever imagined. Your hair and makeup were flawless and your outfit fit your body like a glove. His mind drifted back to all of the times he’d made you laugh, all the times you’d spent together since meeting in high school. His heart hammered thought his chest, his jersey feeling as thought it was rippling from the aftershock.

You stood there, a small smile on your gorgeous face as you lifted your camera to snap his picture. Your eyes watered upon seeing him, something you’d known would probably happen.

“Kageyama moves dude!” Yaku whisper shouted as Kageyama snapped back to reality, his brain processing that he was holding up the line of his teammates.

“Oh sorry-” he apologized as he glanced forward and made his way to the starting line. His mind emptied of every thought he’d had, filing instead with your imagine as it implanted itself in his brain. At the greeting line, he turned to see you now staring back at him, the same sweet smile he loved plastered on your flawless face.

You couldn’t help but smile at him. Tobio was almost exactly as you’d remembered him. Sure, he was a little bit bigger; he’d obviously gained some muscle and matured since living in Italy but deep down, he was still the same boy you’d remembered from high school. Your heart fluttered just watching him, the memories of all your time spent together flooding your brain.

“We’d like to welcome you all to tonight’s special match. Team A vs Team B, a mash up of Japan’s best!” The announcer rang as the crowds cheered. You quickly made work of snapping as many pictures as you could, moving from side to side to capture the men’s forms prior to the game.

You’d been known as a legend in the sports world, your talent for photography starting in high school and only furthering afterwards. Your photos made the cover of many Japanese magazines, thanks to help from Akaashi as well as covers world wide. Noya would often send you texts, showing you how he’d send your photos all across the globe on his travels. Even Hinata had snapped a selfie or two with your magazine covers.

Tobio watched as you worked, following your every move as he prepared to warm up. He loved how passionate you were about photography. Since moving to Italy, he’d continued to follow your career collecting magazines that features your photographs and following your instagram page. He never interacted with you but that didn’t mean he didn’t order prints and support whatever projects you partook in, donating money to fundraisers you sponsored.

As the warmups began, you took your place at the side of the court. You watched as Hinata, Goshiki, and Romero all spiked. Balls slammed on the floor as the memories of your days photographing volleyball continued to flood your mind. You chuckled as you remembered how many times you’d nearly been hit or how many times Tobio would pull you off the court because he didn’t trust someone not to harm you.

He’s been protective of you even in High school, Hinata often teasing him about how he treated you like you were made of glass. In hindsight, Hinata probably knew better than anyone that his best friend was in love with you way back in high school.

You turned back to see Kageyama holding a volleyball, his focus still on you as you exited the court for the teams to switch. He shifted his attention back to the spikers as he took his place near the net. You were caught in the moment, his beautiful and perfect set gliding through the air as Bokuto slammed it into the opposing court, the crowd cheering him on. Tobio hadn’t changed, not one bit.

The game started as you began maneuvering the court, trying to capture as many shots as possible. The energy was palpable as you moved all around. Set after set, you found yourself drawn into every single play, every single serve and spike. This is why you loved volleyball.

At the end of the game, you tried to compose yourself, coming down from the high of an incredible match. You’d managed to run through nearly three memory cards, taking well over a thousand pictures of just the game itself. The guys took pictures with fans after the match as interviewers and Tv personnel flocked to their sides.

However, your job was complete, the requirements set forth by Kuroo full-filled. You walked over to your camera bag and began to disassemble and put away your equipment. Unbeknownst to you, someone had followed you.

Tobio stood a mere two feet behind you, his eyes tracking your bent over form as he tried to gather up the courage to speak to you. He’d never had a problem speaking his mind, never an issue telling people what he thought but for some reason, his mouth was incredibly dry despite drinking an excessive amount of water.

He watched as you fiddled with your camera bag, the same bag he’d gifted you for graduation years ago. It was your favorite color and just the right size. His chest filled with pride knowing you were still using it, that you’d still been keeping him close.

While he was staring, you’d turned around, startling and grabbing your chest in surprise at the giant, 6’2” setter standing behind you.

“Good god Tobio you scared me!” You laughed, your hand over your chest as you tried to regain composure.

“I-damn, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to- I was just wanting to… hi YN,” he finally stuttered out as you smiled up at him, his beautiful blue eyes lighting up with joy.

“Hi Tobio. Long time no see!”

“Yeah it’s been a while,” he mumbled, rubbing the back of his head, “I’m glad you could make it.”

“Me too! You did amazing out there. I’d forgotten how different seeing you playing in person was!” You added as he lowered his hand down.

“Seeing me in play in person?”

“Yeah silly, I told you’d I’d be watching you. I meant it. I’ve watched every game,” you answered. He knew you wouldn’t lie to him but just hearing you say it, after wondering for years if you were watching, it made him feel incredible.

“Hey Yn, I’m in town for another week, would you maybe consider having dinner with me?” He inquired, desperately hoping you’d agree to meet with him.

You eyes widened at his question. You hadn’t been expecting this, hadn’t been expecting him to ask you to dinner. You’d thought he might say something to you but never this. Before you could answer, he continued.

“If not it’s ok, it’s just that, well I’ve been thinking about you since I left, and I’d really like to catch up. But if you don’t want to-”

“I’d love to Tobio,” you replied as he jerked back a little.

“Wait really?” You giggled at his reaction as you nodded in confirmation.

“I’ve been thinking about you to, and I’d love to go out with you.” He smiled down at you as your beautiful doe eyes met his.

“Hey Kageyama! Come on man we are going out to celebrate!” Hinata shouted as he waved to you. You waved back as Kageyama looked conflicted between you and Hinata.

“Go and have fun, ok? Text me tomorrow and we will make a plan to meet,” you assured him, squeezing his bicep as he smiled back and nodded. He turned, running towards the locker rooms before stopping and turning back. He ran back up to you as you watched in confusion before being swept up into a tight hug, your body instantly relaxing as you hugged him back. Yep, you definitely missed this.

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couldntbemestaysafeyall · 8 months

Text

The DUFF (Dumb Unaware Fundamental Friend)

✧ ｡ pairing: Kageyama x reader

✧ ｡ genre: hurt to comfort.

✧ ｡ warnings: cursing, insecurities, reader being oblivious, reader puts herself down a lot🥲, rejection,.

✧ ｡ In which Y/n doesn’t believe any guy would ever like her because they all seem to be infatuated with her best friend Kiyoko

You and Kiyoko have been friends since elementary school. You two just clicked (it also helped that she lived right next door, and your parents loved each other.) She was like a sister to you, and she felt the same way towards you. You always knew Kiyoko was pretty, hell everyone knew but you discovered that her beauty was unmatched in the 8th grade. “Y/n I think Neko likes you” Kiyoko says as you two put your bikes on the bike rack “What no way” scoffing slightly feeling flustered at her assumption “he always helps you with your work and he walked with us to school today” she laughs at your obliviousness “Well yeah cause he lives near us and is our friend” you try to explain though you hope her assumption is right “He isn’t OUR friend, he’s yours, I only know him because of you” she says as she gets her shoes out her locker “whatever Ki" you laugh and walk with her until you have to bid her farewell for the day because you two are in different grades. All class the only thing you could think about was what Kiyoko said and it made you so happy to know someone liked you. “Hey y/n” the little boy came up to you with a hint of red on his cheeks and obviously nervous “Yes Neko?” you smiled thinking you knew what he would ask. “I like Shimizu-san and hanging out with her-” of course what did you expect? before hearing the rest you run out the cafeteria and go to the bathroom crying for the rest of lunch.

Being a second year in high school while your best friend AKA the most beautiful girl in the school wasn’t easy. Guys would constantly ask you to help them ask her out some even going as far to give you their gifts they wanted to give to her. It was clock work by now you’ve learned to stay away from the male crowd throughout high school knowing they tend to use others for their personal gain. Kiyoko was beautiful. You knew that but you never once would say you hated her for it. Though you did admit you envied her. You envied how she would be noticed in a room of people. You envied she had so many suitors and of course you envied her beauty. “Please don’t post that I look horrid” a phrase you used every time you took a picture with another party. Guys never looked at you girls talk to you but the moment she walks through the door their attention shifts. It hurt but life kept going and so would you.

“Y/n these are our newest additions to the team they’re first years so please don’t do them dirty with the yearbook photos.” Kiyoko and you giggle remembering how badly you did your fellow first years last year. “Yeah, last year you made me look like a gremlin” Noya says whining “You are a gremlin” you comment looking at the short boy and laughing as you enter the gym with the two “KIYOKOOOO” you hear Tanaka screaming “Does that boy ever shut up” you look at Kiyoko with a scoff. “Tanaka please quite down the 1st years need their pictures taken” the older girl says politely while leading you to them. “Nice to meet you all I’m L/n Y/n and you’ll be seeing me a lot this year considering I will be taking pictures of all of you for yearbook” bowing the 4 boys also bow and introduce their selves to you, but one seems to be more nervous than the rest “Hello I’m Tobio Kageyama a first year”. “We all are idiot that’s what the manager just said” the blonde boy looks at Kageyama which makes you giggle at there childishness while Kageyama swatted the taller boy away and looked embarrassed “No need to be embarrassed its ok you guys can chill around me I don’t believe in that seniority stuff” you say looking at all the boys “So which one of you would like to get your pictures taken first-” you ask being cut off “N/n do you want me to get you anything” Kiyoko quickly ask before you get any volunteers “Uh sure strawberry milk” you say and she nods “So back to what I was saying any-” you’re cut off by the short red head they call Hinata “ME ILL GO” you laugh at his excitement you finish with Hinata and Tsukishima leaving the green and black headed boys. As your about to ask Kiyoko comes back with your drink “Thanks Ki” you say grabbing the drink “I’ll go” the black-haired boy who was previously against going stands up. Ha, you guess he has confidence now that Kiyoko is here. You’re not surprised 1st years always have crushes on her and want to show off it didn’t bother you until they started asking you to give her their gifts and ask her if she’d go out with them. It’s gotten to the point whenever someone comes up to you flustered or slightly blushing you politely escort yourself from the conversation knowing what it would lead to. “ok” with a simple nod. You finish up the pictures and call it a day bowing and saying goodbye.

“Uh hey y/n” a 3rd year whose name you can’t quite remember “Hi is there something you need?” you say smiling up at the taller and older male “Yeah well yesterday I was talking to Kiyoko and she was telling me all about you and how you were close and I was wondering if you would -” you cut him off “I’m sorry I have to decline I can’t help you” you scoff and walk away not even letting the boy finish his sentence. Gosh why are guys like this can’t they just tell the girl they like them and move on why do they go to the friends. The entire interaction was common, Kiyoko talked about you a lot and I guess that’s why guys would always come up to you. They never came up for you. (At least that’s what you assumed) Somehow Kiyoko would always come up in the conversation “Yeah I saw you with Kiyoko” or “Kiyoko told me about you” it was clockwork, but you always shut it down. You loved Kiyoko but sometimes wish she didn’t always bring you up. Today you were gonna go to volleyball to take pictures of the athletes you had gotten close to some of the new players like Hinata and Yamaguchi. It was obvious to you though that Tsukishima wasn’t much of a talker and that Kageyama preferred to only talk to his team and of course Kiyoko. You commended him for that though he didn’t try getting to her through you. You also respected his love for the sport. What made you upset is he was the only one on the team who didn’t look you in the eye. Yes, you said you didn’t believe in the seniority bull shit but still he didn’t have to exclude you so much. He didn’t have problems talking to other people . But it shouldn’t matter to you as much as it does. “Shitt, I forgot to bring the green screen and I think everyone in yearbook already left” you groan “Ki can you help me get it its pretty heavy” you say to your friend “OK-” she’s cut off by the black-haired setter “I’ll help” he says standing up. Nodding you two go upstairs to get the green screen while going you two talk about volleyball and yearbook he wasn't as cold as before and your conversation was actually enjoyable. “Thanks Kageyama you're a real gentlemen” you say as you open the door to the room. “My mother told me pretty ladies shouldn’t have to carry heavy things” he says slightly blushing. Ouch you guess he’s implying Kiyoko’s too pretty to carry this which is true, but it hurts to know he doesn’t think the same about you. “It’s over there” pointing and going over to it. You begin to pick it up, but the setter takes it out your hands “Didn’t you hear what I said” he sighs looking down and blushing. You feel like your entire world was frozen. Everything just stopped. He was referring to you? No way. He must want something or someone. Guys don’t call you pretty they call you to call Kiyoko pretty. You see him leaving with the green screen hand and follow while the rest of the walk is silent.

“I think Kageyama likes you” Kiyoko says as you brush her hair. You laugh to yourself knowing that every time she says that she’s wrong “And what makes you believe that? the boy barely looks at me” you say getting a rubber band for her hair “He keeps asking me things like ‘where’s y/n’ ‘is y/n coming today?’ he definitely has a crush on you” she says looking at you with a smirk. “Yeah, sure he probably just wants good photos” you laugh “Whatever don’t be surprised when he asks you on a date” she smiles at you mischievously. You two go to sleep after enjoying your little slumber party. To be honest Kiyoko’s words got to you but knowing your history with boys you didn’t get your hopes up. It wouldn’t surprise you if he was only asking for you to start a conversation with Kiyoko, but between him calling you pretty and what Kiyoko was saying it was hard not to dream. It had officially occurred to you might have a crush on the underclassman you met a 4 months ago.

“Hey Kags, I was told by Kiyoko, you wanted me to get some more solo shots of you?” you questioned looking the boy in the eye. He nodded continuing to look down “Yeah I wanted them to add to my twitter, I heard colleges are starting to look at social medias” he says still not looking you in the eye. “Yup they do that these days. Do you want to see some photo references of previous athletes I’ve done to get a feel and some inspiration?” “sure” you guys spend an hour laughing at the old photos you took showing him how bad you were when you first started and him telling you how he wished he was a 1st year back then. It didn’t take a genius to see that you genuinely enjoyed conversating with Kageyama. You two hear a noise coming from the front and you see Kiyoko walk in. Kageyama quickly sits up straight and looks her in the eye flustered. Oh gosh “hey Ki” you say awkwardly smiling “Hi N/n hi Kageyama” she smiles as she goes to start prepping for tomorrow leaving you and Kageyama in an awkward silence. “This one looks cool” he points at the picture you took of the basketball captain. You nod and begin telling him how to pose which is difficult because he keeps looking at Kiyoko roaming around the gym. “Hey um Kageyama I need you to look at me while we do this” slightly agitated by the boys lack of focus. Yes, Kiyoko’s pretty. Yes, you aren’t as gorgeous as her. Yes, you get that every male wants her and not you. But could he at least respect the fact you’re doing something for him that you don’t NEED to do. You could be doing homework right now or watching Netflix but you’re here on a Friday afternoon taking his pictures. “Ok guys I’m gonna go home make sure to lock up” Kiyoko says smiling “WAIT!” the black-haired boy stops her in her tracks “Can we umm talk about something privately?” he says looking back at you then back at her. You hated men. You hated how they could make you feel special one second then crappy the next. You hated how easily they could be deathly handsome and oh so funny but still never want you it made you sick. “Y/n can you wait until me and her are finished?” he says looking at you with his oh so beautiful eyes “Umm actually I’m gonna go now we can finish this on Monday” you put your camera away and thank God you didn’t bring the green screen “Wait but why” the boys question goes unanswered as you walk out the gym surprisingly, he follows you. “Y/N WAIT” you don’t stop until you feel his hand grab your arm “Why are you-” you quickly cut him off “I don’t care if you want to stare Kiyoko down all shoot or not even look me in the eye I don’t even care that you like her, but I do care that you’re wasting my fucking time so please get the hell off of me and find someone else who will take your stupid pictures” you yell at the now confused boy he loosens his grip looking at you confusingly. “What are you-” it too late now you’ve already gotten on your bike a rode away

“Y/n what the hell” Kiyoko comes in your room slamming your door “Kiyoko I’m not in the mood” she turns your TV off and looks at you “You liked Kageyama and he liked you what the fuck is your problem?” she says looking at you pissed “Kiyoko you don’t get it he was using me to get to you” you scoff looking at her with tears in your eyes “What the hell are you talking about Y/n that boy likes you” she says looking at you for answers “the last time you told me a guy liked me he ended up liking you every guy in my life has wanted you and I get it your hot your pretty your awesome I’m not so can you just be perfect somewhere else right now” you can’t help it you don’t want to scream at Kiyoko it’s not her fault but it hurts it hurts always being the friend who never gets chosen it hurts being the ugly one it hurts being you. “First y/n you aren't ugly your fucking gorgeous and second what do you mean ‘last time’” she sighs and shows her confusion trying to recall the time she was wrong. “Neko 8th grade remember” you shake your head “Neko did like your y/n what are you on about YOU rejected him” she says looking at you even more confused “What no I didn’t what are you on he literally told me he liked you and hanging out with you” you are screaming at the girl who obviously doesn’t know any of your timeline. “Omg y/n this entire time you thought he liked me??? He literally told me he was gonna confess to you the day after I told you he liked you, but he said you ran off before he could even speak?” you sit there shocked. “There’s no way why else he would say he liked you” you say looking at your friend “Y/N are you an idiot you didn’t even let him finish” she sighs clearly annoyed by this situation “He was gonna ask if you and him could walk home together ALONE without me, but he didn’t want to be rude” Kiyoko recalls the day.

“Kiyokoooo y/n rejected me” Neko cries to the older girl “Oh im sorry Neko im sure she still wants to be friends” she tries calming the heartbroken boy “Sh-she didn’t talk to me for the rest of the day, and s-she ignored me during class” he cries you ignored him for the rest of the year assuming he liked Kiyoko.

What. You almost cried hearing that. This whole time it wasn’t that you were ugly or unlikable. It was that you were an idiot “I just assumed all the guys wanted you after that I thought no guy would ever like me” you say looking down “N/n are you serious do you know how many guys ask me about you on the daily basis??? You’re like the most gorgeous and sweet girl I know everyone likes you” she says looking at you serious “I’ve tried sending so many guys you way, but they all told me you rejected them so I just thought you weren’t ready" you felt your whole identity diminish. People liked you? What the fuck “Wait wait wait was that 3rd year one of them” now feeling guilty for not even letting the boy speak “yahhhh Ashahi was so sad when you rejected him, he thought you thought he was intimidating and ugly” she chuckles at you. It all clicks now. Maybe not every single guy thinks your Kiyoko’s ugly best friend. “Wait until he finds out I thought I was the ugly one” you laugh but Kiyoko looks at you seriously “Why did you never tell me you felt that you were unwanted? You know you can tell me anything N/n” she looks down feeling guilty for not reassuring you. “I just didn’t want to come off as jealous or bitter Im so happy everyone finds you almost as beautiful as I do” you chuckle “But I can’t sit here and lie and say I wasn’t envious I thought for years I was ugly and unwanted” “Y/n I’ve never met anyone as gorgeous as you and god I wish I would have known that you felt unwanted so I could tell you how much so many boys and even girls are dying to have you” she laughs apologetically “Ok how about this every time one of us feel ugly or insecure about something or unwanted we tell each other deal?” she says holding out her pinky “Deal” you smile and interlock pinkies “I love you Ki” “I love you more N/n” she says laying her head on your shoulder

It’s been a week since the entire situation with Kageyama and usually by now you’d admit your wrongs and apologize. But this wasn’t a usual situation at all, and it sucked that you had to take pictures for them at regionals which was only a few days away. You’re currently setting up while a brown haired boy comes up to you “Hey I saw you and your friend setting up and-” you cut him off “Not gonna help you do it yourself” you say continuing your work “Oh sweetie do you not know my name I don’t need hel-” “I don’t know your name and I don’t want to so you can go talk to her yourself” still not even looking at the boy “I’m Tōru Oikawa and I don’t know what you’re talking about but I know your hot and I’m hot and hot people should stick together” he says trying to get in front of you but failing because you keep turning “Oikawa-san this isn’t your side you should leave” Kageyama comes next to you. “Tobio didn’t anyone ever tell you it’s rude to interrupt your seniors” Oikawa scoffs “I don’t want you and neither does Kiyoko please leave or ill have to report you” you say calmly to the boy “ok ok i'm sorry” as he walks away you look at Tobio he seems a little sad and extremely mad at Oikawa “Y/n I don’t know what you thought I was asking Shimizu-san but I promise that’s not the case I was gonna ask her how I could ASK YOU out and it just all went to shit I promise the only reason I was looking at her is because I was embarrassed to tell her how I felt and- and” you stop the boy from continuing his ramble by placing a kiss on his lips. “I get it Tobio its not your fault I had a lot of insecurities to deal with and I realized that I can’t let others attraction to me be my worth.” The now flustered boy looks at you with puppy dog eyes. “I like you too Tobio, but we should take it slow literally a week ago I thought I was hideous, and no guy would want me” you laugh at yourself “I want you” Kageyama whispers under his breathe “I want you too, but I need time is that ok?” you ask hoping he answers yes “Of course I don’t care how long just- just know I really like you and think you’re the most gorgeous human being in the world. You laugh at his comment and realize that you like him maybe just a little more than you thought.

#haikyu x reader #haikyuu!!#haikyuu fanfiction #haikyū!!#kageyama tobio #kageyama haikyuu #hq angst #haikyuu #haikyuu comfort #kageyama angst #kageyama x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyu #haikyuu xreader

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incorrecttom · 1 year

Text

They love to be around you. To know that you are safe, to know that you are well and fine with them. To know that you are breathing and laughing. It soothes their nerves, to know you are safe beside them.

People call them co - dependent, which might be true. Not that they will deny that, mostly because they need you. But it's more of their trauma of losing people. Or, they might have never had a person like you present, throughout their time together.

Of not having those people around them, they blame themselves for it. They always do, it's just that they are good at hiding.

Good at burying their insecurities, having their walls so high that they are impossible to scale. To throw the smiles which never really meant anything to them, until you came.

You opened and melted all their walls. Always being there for them, always taking care of them. How could they not be protective of you? How could they not fear, the fact that you might be taken away from them? What if something happens to you?

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mae-gi-writes · 2 years

Text

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION . KAGEYAMA TOBIO

G: angst, fluff. Insecurity.

---

"Do you still love me as much as you did before?"

The chopping comes to a half as Kageyama freezes, the half-cut onion still in his hand while the knife hangs in the air. Nothing is said for a moment, before he slowly turns around to face you.

You're perched on the counter with your bowl of cereal, trying not to meet his gaze as a dense silence fills the room.

"What..." Kageyama trails off, unsure. "What are you talking about?"

You sigh, "you know what I'm talking about."

"Why would you ask that kind of question?" The chopping resumes. He has his back to you, so you don't know what his face looks like. He gives nothing away.

"Because sometimes, I just want to know what's going on in that head. I want to talk to you."

"We are talking."

"You are not talking to me."

Kageyama's stare turns to a full-on scowl and that irks you even more. How dare he show you that face when he's the one who can't even answer you?

For days on end, you've been wondering why in the world were you even together in the first place. Kageyama has never been vocal with his feelings. Neefless to say, sometimes some words of affirmation would've been nice for you to hear, especially when they're so scarce. The thing is though, that words are not Kageyama's forte. They never had been.

Yet, he'd always made sure to make you feel loved in his own manner; a chocolate bar on your desk that you find after he leaves, a note saying that he bought food for you on the fridge, a small kiss to the temple to signal you that he made it back home.

But that doesn't exist anymore. Either he's now so comfortable that he takes you for granted, or he just does not care.

"I'm asking you if you love me still," you can't help but choke up, "and you can't even give me an answer."

He stares you down with such intensity that you almost dodge his gaze. But you merely lift your chin up more defiantly, eyes as hard as the dense silence descending upon the kitchen.

It's useless. Nothing good might come out of this.

You turn away with another sigh that resonates throughout your entire body, "just leave it."

Your body moves on its own accord out of the kitchen until Kageyama's hand snaps out to grab yours, holding it in place.

You hear him breathing hard, almost shaking. But you don't turn, for fear that he'll spot the tears in your eyes. He hates seeing you cry.

"Y/N," he rasps out as if it pains him, "wait."

"For what? For you to apologize and then go back to how we were? How we are?" Your lower lip trembles, "I can't do this anymore, Tobio."

You tug for him to let go but you're met with resistance.

You do it once more, only for Kageyama's grip to tighten.

Finally, you swivel around, ready to bark at him for being so stupid when he lets out a strangled whisper, "don't."

"What?"

"...don't...go."

A small pause as you take in his words. Then, you murmur out, "give me one good reason why."

Kageyama struggles to find a coherent answer. You know him well enough to imagine the way he's tensing his jaw, the way he looks at the ground like it might give him inspiration.

And like every other time, you wait.

Because that's what you do best.

That's what you always do for him.

"I--" he hesitates, prompting you to turn around only to find him holding back choked tears. It stuns you, for you've never actually seen him emotional, not since the start of your relationship.

"I--I can't do this," is what he manages to come up with, "not without you."

And then, as if sensing it's not enough, he follows that up with, "--I'm sorry."

You cave in. Pull him in as your hands loop around his waist before tugging him into a hug.

He all but collapses into you, burrowing into the side of your neck as you feel the heat of his breaths, the trickle of silent tears along your skin.

"I'm sorry," he mutters once more, the words vibrating against your nape. He tightens his hold like this might make up for it. It does, for the mosy part. You can count on your hands how many times he's taken initiative to hug you.

It feels nice.

"I'm very tired Tobio," you say softly into his hair, "I'm very tired."

"I know."

"I don't know how much longer I can do this."

He doesn't say anything. Just hugs you tighter.

"Just--please don't do this to me. It--it hurts."

He nods, "I'm sorry, Y/N."

"I know."

Nothing else needs to be said. You don't know how much time you spend in his arms but that night, he's not the first one to let go. You do when you realize that the laundry is calling for you.

"I have to go take them out," you start pulling away, though Kageyama is quick to hold you back to him.

Your eyes flutter up to his face. He's already looking at you, dark orbs searching your features for a silent question that he can't--won't -- say out loud.

Then, slowly taking his time to closw the distance, his mouth hovers over yours for a moment of hesitation.

He kisses you softly. Like it's the first time. For a moment, you stop breathing.

It takes you a moment to kiss back just as softly. Tenderly. The kiss is short and sweet, and everything that makes your heart burst in your chest.

Your body can't help but tremble in his arms.

"I'm sorry," he can't help but mutter in-between kisses against your mouth, "I'm so sorry."

Your answer is a deeper kiss, one that causes his head to buck back as a small gasp dies in his throat.

You pull back only when he's a gasping mess of heavy breaths and mussed-up hair, looking down at you through half-open lids as desire swirls through his dark pupils.

"Just don't do it again."

He nods curtly. Leans down once more to claim your lips.

And you close your eyes in bliss.

This is home to you.

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eunoiaaaivy · 11 months

Text

you're enough.

tw: breakdown, angst, hurt with comfort, a bit of cyber-bullying and bad comments (not from kags).

a/n: purely self-indulgent, hihi.

the sounds of crying resonates through the dimly-lit condo as you heave up and down. you couldn't breathe properly, the sadness consumed you in a way you never wanted. haven't you given enough?

a hand, a very warm hand at the small of your back coos you gently. kageyama didn't mind at all, he felt at frantic no matter how gentle his touch was.

kageyama wasn't good with this, he was awkward. but seeing you breakdown like this hurts him so bad, he could hear his heart shattering as your sobs became more louder.

each sob resonating the wall break his heart, the weight of the world was on your shoulders yet he can't figure out how to fix this. how to remove it from your shoulders.

this burnt out state you're in- this mess you were in, was so valid. yet the way you shook uncontrollably made his mind feel a bit haywired, short circuiting while it tried to comfort you.

"haven't i given enough, tobio? im so exhausted, so tired yet i can't even feel enough." you sobbed out to his chest, chin on top of your head as kageyama's hand continues to soothe you out.

"who said that love? you've done more than enough- you're enough. your feelings are valid. i know you're sad and im sorry for not knowing how to comfort you...but im always here for you." kageyama said in an awkward voice, but panicked quickly as you sobbed more on to his chest.

"i don't deserve you tobio! you shouldn't have a girlfriend who's sobbing because of other people's mean comments!" you wailed out more as you clutched his shirt. it hurts to know that you received so much hate, so much pressure from his fans.

"hey, who said that? what matters is i love you...and that i have you." the blue eyed adult whispered out in a bit of aggression, angry to whoever said that to you.

"but you could've done better you know? you could've found someone better, prettier and just perfect for you." you muttered out in a hurt tone, a clear indicator you were on the edge.

"and i did, because i have you. you're enough for me, im sorry for the way my fans treat you. i'll ask help from the pr to help us fix this. you don't have to pressure yourself." he whispers out quietly, breath stammering with the way this pressure was so...consuming and negative.

a kiss to your forehead, and long words he doesn't drag out outside of the corridors comfort you. sniffles turning in to laughter and a small smile replacing the frown you once had.

kageyama had to put a stop on to this. and so he did. the team posted a message, a text for privacy and respect. it may hurt, but doesn't his fans want him to be happy?

the bullying came to a stop as kageyama became more private on all his socials, pictures of fits and after-games with his teammates. what they don't know is that his other private account was filled with his everyday life- pictures of the both of you. from dates to gifts to just pictures of yourself.

kageyama stares at his phone, the picture of you wearing one of the biggest smiles he has seen after a few months. it makes his heart beam with pride as he gets to call you mrs. kageyama now, a big grin showing up on his face as he sees the wedding ring on your ring finger once he plopped his phone down on the bed.

you really were enough for him.

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios #hq headcanons #kageyama loml <3 #kageyama tobio #kageyama angst #kageyama x you #kageyama x reader #kageyama tobio x you #kageyama tobio x reader #tobiokageyama #hq tobio #tobio kageyama #tobio kageyama x reader

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illidesence · 5 months

Text

“𝙙𝙞𝙖𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙙 𝙚𝙮𝙚𝙨”

Synopsis: The memories of her being there plague him

Character(S): Tobio Kageyama, Reader

Platonic or Romantic?: Romantic

Angst

Word Count: 650

Notes: Might be a a tad bit confusing cause i’m tired and thought of this like an hour ago

“You know Tobio, you really should cut your hair! Your bangs cover your eyes.”

The young girl smiled at the young boy, her smiling face covering most of his vision, …well besides his bangs

“No! They make me look cool!”

The boy pouted, swatting the girls hand away from his face, walking away to pick up a volleyball

It was the girls turn to pout, walking swiftly next to him

“But Tobio! Your eyes are so pretty! They’re like Diamonds…”

The boy, ‘Tobio’, tensed up, unaccustomed to compliments. He quickly shot down the young girls flattering words, fighting off the tinge of blush on his face.

—

Through the years, the young girl, ‘Y/n’, would comment on Tobio’s eyes, making everyone around her aware of just how fond of them she was.

That single day from when they were 8 was far more impactful than either of them could have ever imagined, in strikingly different ways.

“Hey! Diamond Eyes!”

The endearing nickname (at least to him it was) always told him when she was around, always feeling his mood flourish whenever he heard it.

—

He had been called many things since he was 8.

‘King of the Court’ ‘Selfish’ ‘King’ ‘Your majesty’

None of them meaning anything good.

He hated being called names.

“Oh i’m sorry, would you prefer Diamond Eyes, your majesty?

“I guess your pretty eyes really are your only good quality, so selfish…”

It’s all he ever heard

POP!

His head pounded, he couldn’t cope like this. The ringing in his ears only fueled his anger. The popped volleyball in his hands serving as a means to bring him back to his senses.

There was one nickname he didn’t mind though…

The howling of the nighttime breeze and the sliding of the club room door was all he heard. As if his head was on a swivel, his full attention turned to said door

He was expecting someone

He was expecting her

The tears that welled up from before clouded his vision as he rushed for the door

He slammed the rest of the club door open, looking around into the dark night for a sign, any sign

The tears began to try and make shapes. Shapes of what he wished there could be; Comfort, Solace, Her

His knees scraped the ground as he fell, leaving a dull yet prominent pain in his knees as he hurriedly wiped away his tears yet his action proving to be futile.

His hands rushed around his pockets for his phone, opening his camera to hold it close to his face, staring into his own eyes

He saw what she saw, what you saw

“Let it all out Tobio, let your tears flow free…”

It’s as if you were there with him, speaking to him. Though he knew you weren’t.

“It’s okay Tobio, after all…the best diamonds are formed under the highest pressure…”

He smiled sadly on the memory, you always managed to bring that stupid, stupid nickname into things

CLICK

The sound of his camera going off bringing him back to reality. He had taken an up close photo of his tear covered eyes, his eyelashes soaked and eyes puffy

He quickly unlocked his phone to click on your contact, sending you the photo of his glossy eyes as well as a flurry of messages ranging from ‘Please respond’ to jumbled messages reminding you of what you’d always say about his eyes

And he finally got a message back

“Tobio, honey. I know it’s hard for you, but it’s time to move on.”

His tears turned to silent sobs as he slid to the wall

He didn’t want to talk to your family, he wanted to talk to you

He opened his camera app again, staring himself down, capturing every feature of his eyes he could

He wanted to soak in something you loved

He was your diamond eyes…

#kageyama tobio #kageyama x reader #haikyuu tobio #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #hq kageyama #hq kageyama x reader #haikyuu kageyama x reader #tobio kageyama x reader #kageyama angst

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txdxsh1 · 2 years

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YOU BREAK UP WITH HQ BOYFRIEND TEXTS

genre: just angst ….. sorry

characters: atsumu miya, matsukawa issei, kageyama tobio, sakusa kiyoomi, asahi azumane, and kuroo tetsuro

authors not: y’all i literally just conjured up this idea at 1am last night and created half of it then and half of it in the afternoon so …… don’t expect it to be very good

reblogs are greatly appreciated !

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godkeis · 2 years

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𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐔𝐏 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐊𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐘𝐀𝐌𝐀 𝐓𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐎.

pairing: kageyama tobio x f!reader

genre: angst

word count: 429

content warnings: unresolved personality issues, mentions of overthinking

summary: how it is like to break-up with kageyama.

Knowing Tobio, he almost doesn't have time for anything, except for volleyball.

He devoted himself to playing volleyball because it's his everything.

With that, you'll probably be his first girlfriend, first love, first in everything.

The relationship with him will most-likely be long term.

However, despite being together for a long time, there are still some issues that Tobio cannot resolve with himself.

That includes his poor time management and anger issues.

You tried your best to open up how you feel, thinking of some alternatives especially when he's away from you for matches and busy with practice.

Tobio will agree but he never really put an effort into showing it in action because he's too occupied with his career.

Until one day, you cannot take it anymore.

"Tobio, I am a human too. I feel happy, I feel sad. But most importantly, I feel hurt all the time. Our relationship is becoming one sided as time goes by and I don't see improvements from you."

Tobio's heart will sink upon hearing your words, knowing that you've been patient with him and he's the problem.

"I want to break up."

Tobio would want to negotiate your feelings once more but overthinking will overpower him.

He knows deep inside that if you give him another chance, he won't still be able to fulfill it and it'll break your heart more.

Concluding that it's best to separate ways, he'll agree to breaking up because honestly, he saw this scenario happening way back before.

The first few weeks, he'll shut everyone completely out.

Practicing almost 13 hours a day, going home with an exhausted body, showering, going to sleep.

He wanted to divert his mind so badly because if he doesn't, he knows it'll break him apart that you two broke up already.

There wasn't a single day that he didn't stalk your social media.

And when he sees that you're smiling often, the glow in your face radiates, and you're genuinely happy, he'll sigh because you're finally experiencing the happiness that you deserve.

The happiness that he couldn't give because of his personal issue.

I don't see Tobio as the type to chase someone but instead, I see him slowly working his issues out as a respect for his next significant other.

His first love taught him the hard process of character development and he's silently wishing that his next love can teach him how to apply the product of his hard-work in his personal issues.

Tobio will most likely keep connected with you but it'll definitely be platonic after that.

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lumiinix · 2 years

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You like him, he likes you too. It’s very obvious to those around you and even to you guys too, but the athletic career you two choose made pursuing a relationship very hard so none of you made a move. It’s like a silent agreement : “I like you and I know you like me, but I don’t think this relationship would work.” so instead, you two continued to support eachother.

It should have stay just that, it should have. You don’t want to hurt the other by not being there because of lots of traveling, and long distance relationship didn’t really sound good to you two. But when you found yourself being in the same place as him once again, maybe, just maybe, you think, this relationship might work out.

-Hinata, Kageyama, Ushijima, Oikawa.

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sassycheesecake · 10 months

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DAY 6 : (ALSO LAST DAY) WRATH : TOBIO KAGEYAMA

You know this is just a one-time thing, that he’s only using you for his own pleasure. He snaps his hips into yours with a punishing pace, the force of his thrusts making the headboard bang into the wall constantly.

His raven-black hair is matted with sweat on his forehead, his head is thrown back, mouth open to let out loud moans.

All of sudden, he stops and when he opens his eyes to look at you, a shiny silver glows in his irises, making you believe that you’re looking into the brightest star tail across a night sky.

"T-Tobio…" You sigh out his name in pleasure.

He chuckles darkly, pulling out and flipping you over with ease.

Now laying on your stomach, Kageyama wastes no time in pushing back into you without a warning.

He caught his girlfriend cheating on him at the bar at a night out with one of his teammates and you as her best friend were the first person in his vision to have revenge sex with as payback.

‘It’s only for one time. I need to show that bitch that she can’t do as she pleases.’ You remember his words clearly.

Your thoughts are interrupted by a harsh bite against your shoulder and you tell him to be a little bit more gentle.

"Can’t handle a little roughness? I have to show your bestie that she can’t go around being a whore. And you’re the perfect fit for telling her later on that I fucked her best friend’s brain out.”

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyū!!#hq x reader #kageyama x you #kageyama smut #kageyama tobio x reader #kageyama angst #kageyama x reader #kageyama tobio #day 6 #wrath #sin wrath

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kita-shinsuke-whore · 2 years

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"I didn't sign up to be disrespected by someone i lowered my standard for"

TW: Angst, Mentioning their ex's name, Miscarriage, Bodyshames.

Character: Iwaizumi Hajime, Oikawa Tooru, Kageyama Tobio, Tsukishima Kei.

Iwaizumi.

- Both of you are colleagues at the designing company and started dating for the last 5 years.

- Both of you are always ready to get married but you two have to work to make sure your marriage life is stable enough.

- One day, you have a meeting with a male client who needs your help to choose designs for his house. It takes you three months straight to work for this project and when you managed to get the promotion for the worthy project, you are happy but you don't know how jealous Iwaizumi is.

"Honey, I'm home!!", you said as you take off your heels and walked inside the dark living room. But no one is answering you. You decided to celebrate this day for you getting the promotion and you even buy lots of dinners to share with him. You switch on the light and look around.

As you thought Iwaizumi is not home yet, you started to prepare the dinner on the table until you heard a girl's voice. "It's tickling, darling!", the voice echos through the house. "Is it from the house next door? Weird, but the voice sounds so near..",you mumbled to yourself. You put down your knife, and walk around the house to find the source of the voice.

While you were walking to reach your bedroom's doorknob, the door opened and revealed Iwaizumi. He is half naked and his whole expression is so surprised by your presence. "Baby?", he called you. "You're home? I thought no one was home", you said to him. You tried to hug him as you missed him so much until a girl opened the door wide and your heart feels like it's going to burst out. "Oh, hi, Y/N!", the girl greeted you with her only wearing a lingerie.

"What the hell...?", you backed off from both of them. "What have you done, Iwaizumi?", you called him by his first name. "I'm sorry, Y/N. But you spend so much time with your so called male client. I bet you slept with him and moaned his name every night", he accused you. You slapped his face so hard that you feel like you could grab his hair and screams how much you hate him now.

"I fucking worked so hard to get the supervisor position for our marriage sake because I'm so in love to have you as my partner in life and my future kids' father. Now that you fucking up my dreams like you fucked your ex girlfriend now on our bed, congratulations!", you said to him.

"Listen here, Y/N. I didn't lowered my standard for someone who can treat me like I'm just a side manwhore for you. At least Aika is better than you!", he yelled at you back.

"Ohh really?? Then, should I say that she is the future wife of the client that you said I slept with? She's just using you, Iwaizumi. Now that you make me hate you, just to let you know, first you are toxic and lastly, you only talking bout big game until you naked."

You pushed both of them, packed all of your things, and before you leave, you said your final words.

" You grossed me out when you fucked me, Hajime."

Oikawa.

- Both of you met when he had his preliminary event in Brazil and you were one of the audiences.

- He is the one who confessed to you after three months trying to get you, so you just accepted him.

- One day, you found out that you are pregnant his child for 2 months. So you decided to keep it as a secret until he arrives home from Argentina until next month.

You picked him up from the airport but his face looked so exhausted. "Baby, do you want me to bring you to spa? Do you want to have some therapeutical sessions?", you asked him but your eyes are stick on the road. "No, i just want to get home.", he said. You thought he probably having a homesick mood so you drive home without stopping anywhere.

Once you arrived home, you helped him to unpack his luggage and do his laundry. He lays on the bed, trying to sleep. You decided to cook some food for him and when the time reached 7pm, you opened the bedroom door and wake him up. He scowled and pushed you so hard that you fell down. "Go fucking away. Why you are so caring about me? I don't need you to rub all your loves to me 24/7.",he said. "Why are you being such a bitch today, Tooru?", you told him, trying to stand up until you feel something wet between your thighs.

"Tch, listen here Y/N, i didn't lowered my standard for someone who is so clingy and at least Nanako gives me enough space to breath.", he said.

"Oikawa...Maybe I'm too late to tell you this, but I'm pregnant your child.",you said. Oikawa slowly turned his head to look at you, smiled until he sees you on the floor with blood trickling down your thighs.

"OMG, Y/N! I AM SORRY.", he said, when he finally panicked. God knows how he wish he could turn back time. You started to cry and whispered to him, "You killed our baby...You killed them, Oikawa. That's your baby too, killer", you cried. You walked slowly, grabbing the car key and your phone and purse but Oikawa swooped you up. He rushed you to the hospital and the emergency department handles you. After 26 minutes, the doctor comes out from the ward and looked at Oikawa. The doctor doesn't have to tell him anything because he can heard you, yelling out of frustration, "NOO, WHY ARE YOU TAKING AWAY MY BABY! NOOO!", your voice cracked but only mothers who lost their precious babies can relate.

Oikawa didn't dare to meet you until your parents come to visit you and that's how your father slapped him and asked him to leave you. "You don't deserve my daughter, that's why you deserve a place in Hell, you fucking bastard.",your father said to him.

You are grateful with your father's action after what Oikawa has done to you.

Kageyama.

- Both of you met during sport camp event and you two really liked each other.

- One day, you two are meeting his old friends and even his old love is there.

"Hi, this is my girlfriend, Y/N. And Y/N, they are my old friends from primary school. This is Higuchi, Mika, Lia and Furuma.", he introduced you to them.

"Hi, I am Lia. I used to date Kageyama and not gonna lie, I didn't realize he could pull someone pretty like you", Lia said. You smiled and thanked her. "Thank you, Lia. You looked pretty too", you said.

While all of you are having a good conversation, the waiter comes with all of the orders from your table. Suddenly, you accidentally knocked Higuchi's Americano with your elbow and the drink spilled on Lia's white dress. "Oh no, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it", you said. You tried to wipe her dress until she pushed you away. "I told you, Tobio. I can't believe you lowered your standard when I can be the better one.", Lia suddenly turned into a brat and rolled her eyes when she looked at you. What? You can't believe someone can be so fake. "No wonder you get all those Botoxs all over your body to look good", you mumble. Kageyama who realised the whole situation is worsening, suddenly pull you to follow him.

Both of you get inside the car and he didn't even looked at you. "What is it, Tobio?", you asked him.

"Can you stop creating troubles? I didn't lowered my standard for someone who brings embarrassment to me. Lia is better than you and at least she can tolerate someone.", he said those hurtful words. His fingers clench around the steering wheel and you started to sob. "Fine, I'm sorry I'm not Lia. I am tired with you keep on talking about how you actually embarrassed because of me. Okay, Tobio.",you said. You open the car door, slammed it and walk away. Kageyama just let you go, because he never loved you. You're just his rebound.

Tsukishima.

- This guy? His shitty behaviour. Judgy look, words and everything about him stings.

"Y/N, I didn't lowered my standard for someone to be so ugly. You look like a sack of potatoes wearing that dress. At this point, my lovely Sahiko is cuter", he would keep on repeating those words to you.

You are so damn stupid for still wanting to be with him until one day...you caught him making out with your cousin who is actually Sahiko.

"Aww, sorry for kissing your boyfriend, Y/N. You don't mind we shared right? Plus I can sense he is grossed out with your whole look too", she said.

That night, you break up with Tsukishima and you moved away to Kyoto prefecture. After three months of improving yourself, you managed to lose 12Kg and you even cut your hair to look better. You started to have a better skincare.

You are busy with school as well but manage to take care of yourself until your grandma sends you a letter to come home to attend your aunt's wedding. When you walked into the wedding entrance wearing a red silk dress with both slits at your thighs sides, you managed to make every heart throbs for you. You didn't realize Tsukishima was there and he decided to start a convo with you. "Yo...Y/N? Dawg, you improved yourself a lot", he smirked as his eyes scanned your body up till down. "Oh, please, Kei, keep those eyes away. My visual is not for someone who can't reach my standard.", you laughed. "Stop being such an arrogant chick. You were ugly before too", he cuts you down. "You got the ugly Y/N, your brother gets the gorgeous Y/N", you said. Suddenly, his brother appeared behind you and wrapped his arm around your 26cm waist and kissed your neck. "Oh, Kei chan, you know Y/N?", Akiteru asked him.

"No, he doesn't, darling. He is lost, look a lost puppy~", you said. You then pulled Akiteru and kissed him with your red lips that used to be Kei's. "Fuck, I love you, baby", you whispered to Akiteru but loud enough for Kei to hear.

#haikyuu angst #iwaizumi angst #oikawa angst #kageyama angst #tsukishima angst #haikyuu x reader

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