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wexhappyxfew · 22 days

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you, me, and the stars

(a/n): judy x rosie girlies, this is for you!! this is for all the ones who have never been in love, who are trying to protect the last parts of themselves in the face of others, and for the ones deserving of love!! these two represent all those awkward, newly-found emotions and feelings, that surprise even themselves, so please enjoy! :)

Judy had dwindled into down to just this; home was more of a feeling, not entirely a place.

The flak house was beautiful, an escape, somewhere to get one's mind off of the mental torment that was the God-forsaken war they all seemed stuck in.

But, it wasn't Thorpe Abbotts; with its metallic scent of air, voices and grinding machine parts echoing at all hours of the day, the marching, the footsteps, the way the air danced through the tree leaves. The flak house was quiet, save for the occasional flight path overtop. Thorpe Abbotts was loud and enough to make you feel like your brain was being knocked about inside, but it was home in a way the flak house wasn't.

The thing that made Thorpe Abbotts feel like home was especially the people. All the men in the 100th, their leaders both lost and MIA, and the women of Silver Bullets.

It was just like her home, in North Carolina. With Ma and Pa, that large house on the river, big meals to feed all six kids, making sure the lambs, chickens and cows were kept up with, that laundry was hung, crops harvested, plates and bowls washed in the river.

They didn't have much, but they had each other.

And even across the ocean they still did - in more ways than one.

Now, Judy felt them even in the women beside her. Strong and courageous, putting on their brave faces against the waging war of the world. Something her family had done ever since they'd come to America.

"The stars are so bright out here," Bessie said from Judy, their arms interlinked, sat side by side on the steps in front of the flak house, the light dripping out from the main door where cool, night air rushed in,

"I almost wish Tommy could see it." Judy looked towards her with a small smile.

"He does," Judy whispered quietly, reaching a hand forward to gently brush her hand over Bessie's calloused palm, "where ever he is right now. He sees it. Maybe not this instance, but he does." She watched Bessie smile, the corners of her lips turning upward, before she glanced over at Judy, a big grin on her face, her eyes glowing, the softest they'd been in days, the least stressed Judy had seen the navigator.

"You know, when we were kids," Bessie started, "we sat in his parents' apartment, right by one of the windows and watched the stars one night, all night practically, side by side. Not only was it my first kiss, but…he also told me he'd name a star after me. I think he named it 'Bee'….something or other." Judy giggled into Bessie's side and clasped a hand over her mouth with a gleeful smile.

"You two were meant to be," Judy whispered quietly, "everything you say, about him, about you, about the two of you together. God, you'll make the cutest babies, Bessie, I'll tell ya." Now, it was Bessie's turn to laugh and shook her head.

"You know he told me one time that if he had a daughter, he'd name her Charlotte," Bessie said, "he thought the nickname, Charlie, would be cute."

"Taste." Judy said with a laugh, nudging Bessie's side, "Charlotte McKenzie has a ring to it."

"And so does Bessie McKenzie." Bessie said back, sending the two of them into a fit of chuckles under the moving dusk. They fell quiet for a beat and then Bessie sighed and wrapped an arm around Judy's side, giving her a tight squeeze and rubbing her shoulder.

"Well, I'm heading up, going to get some rest and enjoy waking up and drinking coffee without having to hear a bunch of bullshit from Blakely," Bessie said with a chuckle, "you good out here? Staying up a bit?" Judy smiled and wrapped her arms around her sides and nodded.

"Yeah, just a bit more," Judy said, "you go though, I'll be up in a bit. And…Bessie?" Bessie watched her as she stood and sent her a smile.

"Just...give Lieutenant Bradshaw an extra hug for me," Judy said sadly, "her eyes looked like she'd been crying all night. About Captain Brady, so….incase I get in late, just do that for me, please?" Bessie smiled at her and nodded.

"You think she loves him?" Bessie asked Judy. Judy stilled.

"I don't know a whole lot about love, but I know he looks at her like she's the only woman in the room," Judy said softly, "and she gets all blushy around him, all soft and sweet. I like to think the universe doesn't just do things for the hell of it." Ripping them from each other, Judy thought to herself. Bessie grinned and then looked at her sadly.

"Try and get some rest," Bessie said, "don't stay up too late, okay? You need to keep yourself well-rested. Goodnight, honey."

"Night, Bes." Judy called after her, watching Bessie offer her a smile and then disappear inside. Judy smiled softly, looking forward again towards the oncoming darkness and comfort of nightfall, the singing birds and bugs all around and sighed.

Lieutenant Bradshaw's eyes looked sadder more often than not, but she was trying and that's all the credit a person like Annie Bradshaw needed - that she was being seen.

To be seen, was to be loved.

"Hey," Judy looked over her shoulder and was almost surprised to see Rosie Rosenthal there, coming towards her from the doorway, hands in his pant pockets, his A-2 jacket over his shoulders and a soft smile on his face, "mind if I join you?" Judy watched him for a moment - he looked so….different, a nice different. A different that made her think they weren't in war for a second.

"Of course, sir," Judy said, watching as he came forward and settled down on the step beside her where Bessie had been, "come to watch the stars?" Rosie let out a chuckle and then glanced towards her, his face bathed in blues and purples from the night, his eyes like a doe's as he watched her.

"You could say that." he said, then he grinned, nodding at her,

"How've you been?" Judy watched him, unable to contain the grin wanting to grow on her face and then chuckled lightly.

"Good," she said, and then smiled nervously, "sir, uh, good, being away from base, it's been….a breath of fresh air, I'll admit. Just, not having to get those planes going in the morning, get in the ball turret and shoot, over and over. It's nice to just….." she watched as he watched her, "be."

"Good," Rosie said, his voice light, "good, good, I'm glad. Really. You've all been putting out the last few months. I know that - Pappy's been talking Kennedy's ear off and well…."

"Collateral damage." Judy supplied and Rosie nodded with a small chuckle, looking down at his hands in his lap.

"Exactly, exactly," Rosie said and then glanced up at her, "I'm just glad the Silver Bullets crew is getting some deserved rest. All of you."

"Thank you, sir." Judy said, her voice tender, watching him in a moment of seriousness that was different than a few seconds previous.

He watched her for a moment, just taking in the feeling it seemed, the same she was allowing herself to feel in her heart. They both seemed to come to at the same time and smiled, laughs leaving both their lips as Judy shyly looked away and crossed her arms.

"I'm sorry, Judy, are you, uh, cold?" Rosie asked leaning forward a bit, and placing a hand on her shoulder, "October's never been a great month for short sleeves." Judy watched him, looking between his face, his hand and him. Short sleeves, right, she was in that right now. And freezing; he was right. How'd he know? She glanced down at her short sleeves, her right side hidden beneath his hand and then looked to him, his face full of worry and seriousness. And then she let out a shy laugh and blushed quickly and then nodded.

"A bit, but," she shook her head, "I was planning to go upstairs in a bit anyway, so, it's okay."

"Here," Rosie said quickly, shrugging himself out of his A-2 and then leaning to his side to lay it over her shoulders, "just to warm up." And warm up she did in fact do; to the point, she was blushing all over and inhaling the scent from his jacket and him beside her and suddenly very overwhelmed with his presence. Alright, so it was a stupid feeling she had been trying to hide, but it was a feeling she had never felt all too well. And in a war, she wasn't sure what to even feel. But right now, with this jacket and him beside her, she wasn't as eager to head up to bed anymore.

"Thank you," she said softly, grasping the edges and then looking at him, "I appreciate it really." Rosie watched her with that tender gaze of his again before leaning back a bit and looking up.

"You can really see the stars from here," he said, his voice a small bit of astonishment and adornment for the world above them, glowing with the life of the night, shining little orbs so far away they'd never be able to actually grasp them, "they're beautiful."

"Yeah," Judy said, her eyes traveling back up to the night sky above them, "sitting in the darkness, on the ground, staring at the stars? It's almost like home." She could feel Rosie staring now, and glanced his way. Something so harrowing, yet nostalgic in a way. A mixture of feelings lingering between them at her simple statement - thoughts of home, seemingly so far away now, a place that'd be changed in a thousand different ways by the time they did actually got home - if they got home.

"Where is home?" he asked quietly, leaning to his side to bump her shoulder. She laughed quietly.

"North Carolina." she said, glancing at him in the quiet - she could practically hear him breathing. It was so … comforting.

"A tiny town," she admitted, "nothing big, a river, a general market, a wood mill, friends here and there down the road. But it was home." Judy looked over slowly towards Rosie beside her and quirked out a smile as she saw him sitting there, grinning.

"What?" she said grinning, "Where you from?"

"Brooklyn." he said, looking at her. Judy's face hurt from smiling, but it was okay because it was Rosie.

"Brooklyn," Judy said with a soft smile, "never really been in one of those big cities."

"You'd like it," Rosie said, looking out towards the darkness, "you'd fit right in. Bright lights, the people, the music. All of it." He looked at her. Judy smiled and pulled her knees to her chest, and glanced towards him again.

"Music, huh?" she asked him and he looked at her with a smile.

"Yeah, can't sing real well, but my mom, my sisters, they're pretty good. Far better than me," he said with a nod, and then grinned, "still love music though. You can never go wrong with Artie Shaw." Judy smiled, her thoughts consumed with the idea of what a younger version of this Rosie could've been, home with his family, dancing and attempting to sing. Far away from war and fear and grief. She liked the thought of that at some point, they were all like that. Young, youthful and free.

"Did you do a lot of music and dancing before the war then?" Judy asked him quietly, with a hopeful smile, watching as he comprehended her sentence and then let out a small smile. He shook his head and then leaned forward on his bent knees.

"I was a lawyer before the war actually," Rosie said and Judy's eye widened in near amazement, "yeah, was doing that and then the war broke out. Couldn't just sit back and do nothing." His face grew serious at that last statement and then melted as he looked at her.

"What about you? What was the thing Judy Rybinski was doing before this whole thing started?" he asked, leaning forward, with genuine curiosity and she watched him before letting out a laugh and shaking her head.

"I'm afraid nothing as cool as being a lawyer," she admitted and she watched Rosie's face soften as he tilted his head towards her, "but I was 3 years removed from high school, didn't have money for college so….I worked in the local mechanics, fixing cars, boats, anything and everything. Learning what I could. Made some good money, too." Judy watched him and sighed.

"But….I always dreamed of getting to go to college, continue to learn, allow myself to grow," she said, her thoughts swimming back to that time her parents told her they didn't have enough to help get her through schooling and Judy had cried herself to sleep and then gathered herself together and gone to the mechanic to start learning some trade, "maybe get a job teaching. Maybe geography or something of that sort….I don't know. One day, that's the goal." Rosie stayed watching her, his eyes holding her gaze as she looked at him.

"You should go for it," Rosie told her, "when the war is over, I mean. You'd be a great teacher, great with kids, getting to teach, you just…." Rosie cut himself off for a moment and then smiled at her, suddenly looking more shy and unsure of himself than in recent minutes. Judy watched him, her cheeks warming slightly at his encouragement and genuine thought. It made her stomach twist pleasingly. Rosie let out a nervous laugh and then looked at her, crossing his arms and leaning against his upbent knees.

"You're just someone I like being around," Rosie admitted quickly, running a hand behind his neck and then glancing at her, "and I think you'd be someone good at teaching kids. And being a teacher so….I think you should go for it." Judy was watching him, her cheeks all crimson and her heart racing and for a moment, she caught his gaze and she saw things that made her heart race faster.

Rosie Rosenthal was equally someone she liked being around, but the thought of telling him that made her sweaty and panicky and she figured she'd embarrass herself, so instead, she blushed further and smiled.

"Thank you, sir," she said quietly, and then let out a small laugh, "sorry, it's just….I haven't really told many people that, so…it just means a lot - the support I mean." Rosie smiled at her and nodded.

"You deserve good things after this war, Judy," Rosie said and then swallowed, "all of us do." Judy watched him, this urge to reach out and brush her palm against his cheek inviting her closer, a wish to curl up beside him and let the stars stare down at them, the need for human touch, to be looked at and loved.

By Rosie.

"You too, sir," she said quietly, her smile soft, "only the best." This staring, these lingering glances, they seemed to be whatever they couldn't say and just that look in his eyes made her blush further. Judy tried to control her racing heart, and her breath, and then cleared her throat.

"I think I'll be heading up now," Judy said, and pressed her palms against her cheeks and then sighed and looked to him, "Bessie said she'd braid my hair and I don't want to keep her up."

"Of course," Rosie said, standing to his feet and then offering his own hand towards her, which she took rather quickly, and then stood there, staring up at him like a goof, "try and get some rest tonight, alright?"

"You too," she said, and then chuckled, "sorry, Lieutenant Bradshaw said she couldn't sleep last night and it ended up being the two of you down here, with Doc, unable to fall asleep, just talking and stuff. So….yeah, just, you too, sir." Rosie laughed at her words and then schooled his facial expressions again.

"Thanks, Judy."

Staring at him, she couldn't constrain what she felt and stood on her tiptoes, before placing a small kiss to his cheek, and then turned and walked away, as fast as her feet could carry her and up the stairs, towards the room she was sharing with Bessie. Her mind raced, her thoughts knocking at the edges of her brain as she hurried in, shut the door, and let out a sigh, before turning to the two beds, where Bessie was sat up in one, reading a book and staring at her, confused.

"Since when did you get a jacket….like that?" Bessie said, raising a brow, "And that, large?" Judy blushed and then tried to speak and choked on her air a bit before clearing herself up.

"It's just Lieutenant Rosenthal's," she said, stepping forward and settling on the side of her bed to take her shoes off, "he saw me outside, gave it to me because he said I looked cold."

"Judith Rybinski," Bessie, sitting up and then practically launching out of the bed to sit beside her, "you're blushing like a loon! What happened?" Judy looked at Bessie, her heart pounding, her thoughts racing, emotions running high in far too many wacky ways. Bessie watched her excitedly, but then slowly let her face fall and wrapped an arm around her shoulder.

"I think he's just being nice," Judy whispered quietly and then shook her head, "and then I gave him a kiss on the cheek because I wasn't thinking-"

"-a kiss? On the cheek?"

"Yes, yes, a kiss on the cheek, it was stupid, he was just trying to be nice-"

"Giving you his jacket in this cold is never just him being nice, Judy-"

"It's a part of it-"

"But not all of it!" Bessie said and looked at her, and smirked, "He probably wants to you know….get to know you more." Judy stared at her and then let her shoulders fall and shook her head.

"No….I don't think so," Judy said and then crossed her arms and bit back her lip, "and plus, did you know he was a lawyer before the war? Bes, he's probably, I don't know, someone from some sort of money to do that sort of thing, ya know? My family comes from people who've lived on the streets, we showered once a week as kids. What am I thinking?" Judy ran her hands over her face and sighed, before squeezing her eyes shut.

"It's stupid," Judy said quietly, "it's just a stupid crush, it'll go away. He's just being nice, and I latched onto that because a nice guy, is a nice guy. But that's it. And….it's fine. I'll be fine." She grew quiet and watched as Bessie stared at her, eyes full of that lingering worry.

"It's not a stupid crush, alright?" Bessie told her, "You're allowed to feel that and if someone's ever told you otherwise, they're the stupid ones. He clearly is someone who is interested, too, Judy. Don't discredit that about yourself. You're one of the sweetest peaches I've ever met. And someone like that? You deserve that." Judy looked over at Bessie and then offered a small smile.

"Thank you, Bessie," Judy said, leaning to her side to pull Bessie into a hug, "you're too nice to me." Bessie chuckled into the hug and patted her back.

"You deserve it, Judy." Bessie said, "A whole lot of things, but sweetness is one of the many."

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palehottubchild · 3 days

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what i like about the secret history is you can tell exactly who 'got' the book and who didnt by the reviews. and im not trying to be snobby or something here if yhe book's not your cup of tea thats totally fine more power to you!! its just funny that the reviews are always either 5 star, greatest read ever, this book caused me physical reactions and i havent slept in 3 days. OR its a 1 star, the book started off great but fell off after the first part, too long and rambly, the focus is on the wrong things too much on the characters not enough on the actual plot. and like, thats kind of what i love about it? the fact that if you read the book like Richard is characterised, if you read the book for the romanticised life of secluded classics students, for the dark academia of it all, then its going to be a shitty read for you! what i personally like about it is that every single character is messed up, every single character is a 'bad person' in a way and the way the idealised romanticised aesthetics are built up meticulously during the first part only to then be brought crashing down in the worst way possible is part of what, to me, makes it such a good book.

And dont get me wrong, i came for the dark academia as well. I bought it because of moodboards and edits and a glowing review about 'this amazing dark academia book' from one of my best friends. I came for all that, but i stayed because of the clearly distorted reality. The fact that you can see more and more clearly in the second part that the entire reality we think we are in is made up imagined and idealised by richards obsession with the aesthetics and i love that its so clearly reflected in the reviews because like. Yes thats The Point!

#sorry for the rant i cant keep my words short ever #and also i cant stop thinking about how much i love all the characters but at the same time despise them all #also judy poovey my queen i love you you deserved better #the secret history #richard papen #donna tartt

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merlinmerlot · 2 months

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I could play one of the most beautiful well crafted video games on the planet and it will never be as appealing to me as one that kind of sucks shit but has soooo much potential

#merlin.txt #just finished cyberpunk #i feel like they could have done sooo much more with the concepts they had #the game showed us a bit of everything in the world but i dont think they explored any one topic enough #and they pulled a ton of punches. the ending did not feel like this big 'grab your allies and fuck the corpos' thing it shouldve been #it was mostly just tying up johnnys loose end. one big loop. which i fuck with; but it wasnt rlly anticapitalist at all in that sense #i have a bunch of other thoughts on johnny but ill save it #but god. the beginning (act 1 and the first bits of act 2) where just soooo fucking good #and it rlly felt like it was going to gear up into this huge thing instead of just being one last hurrah for rogue and johnny #AUUUGHH theres just So Much Potential. goddamn #imo i think the major thing is that at some point it stopped being v's story. it was everyone elses #he has Very little agency. which is interesting but man this guy deserves better #when it comes down to it the game Is really shallow. whenever there is any sincerity in themes its very centrist #the fact is you dont rlly meet many characters in game who are Truly working to take down corps except for johnny and he doesnt rlly count #and if there Are its usually played for irony and laughs (looking at kerry) or theyre flat out kind of awful.#judys story is probably the best of the companions bc shes actively trying to help sex workers and its played very positively #i also think two of the main themes (letting go of the past; what it means to die) are Majorly helped by some incredible emotional beats #and w/o some just Really Really good scenes and good repetition of lines and motifs its very tropey.#ok i wasnt going to write a full thing. but let me be clear: i fucking loved this game. i would not be writing so much if i did not love it #the sun ending was Still soooo vindicating. v is still kicking and that's all that matters to me #(it helps that v is a Great protag like one of the Best voiced rpg protags next to hawke da2)#(which is kind of a funny comparison since i think both protags suffer from a lack of agency)#ok im done now

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judyfromfinance · 9 months

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Just had a Girl Dinner of 2 microwave pizzas.

I hope Barbie is proud of me for living in my Bimbo era of not knowing how to do math.

(I seriously don’t know how to do math. Literature was always my forte.)

Rant under Read More

This post is brought to you by that one post with 50 thousand reblogs about how it’s “misogynistic” to say girl dinner or girl math. And Barbie is not a feminist (you’re right. she’s a doll. don’t know if you knew that.) And women that love wearing pink and the aesthetic that is bimbo-core are the reason that feminism is a joke now.

I hate seeing Women berate other Women for the things they love and enjoy. Fuck us if we want a meme surrounding us that literally does no harm.

Women can’t have anything. And it’s really sad to see that it’s other women trying to take it away. Y’all wack as fuck.

#Judy talks Finance (not really)#the barbie movie #girl dinner #girl math #bimbo core #it’s funny #it’s a joke #no one is taking those tiktoks seriously #the fact that you think women only deserve respect is if they’re good at math #wear conservative clothing #and never make jokes about self deprecation #is dumb as shit #I’m gonna wear a tiny pink skirt with my butt on display #a Barbie crop top #and be bad at math #all while loving myself #and you can take that to the bank

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timaeusterrored · 1 year

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(Watching CR rn so I figured I’d write a dnd night for the group)

It was finally Friday. A day the group looked forward to all week. When Mike made nachos and they all got to be different people for a few hours.

“Are you just.. windmilling over to the booth?” River laughed, covering his face as the group could barely contain their laughter.

“I never said it was a fool proof plan! It was my least dicey as fuck plan!” Mike cried, staring over the map with laughing tears down his face.

“Okay okay okay! That’s sketchy as fuck!” Judy said, wiping her own tears before sitting up and leaning over the table. “Let’s just, swing our arms harder than normal.”

“There’s this, tiefling working, sitting at a table. He’s got white hair, a scruffy beard, he’s dressed in blacksmith leathers, clearly had a long ass day. He’s watching this rogue and monk just.. essentially swing their arms over to the booth.. then he gets up, with a ‘not today’.” The group falls into laughter again as River describes the poor worker.

“Oh shit okay-“ River began giggling again, before clearing his throat. “Holy shit.”

Vincent leaned forward, despite his character being on watch in the back, was interested in what was going on.

“Is there an indent anywhere? Did she leave anything behind?” Mike asked after composing himself.

“Roll for perception.” River stated, the group slowly composing themselves.

“Uhhhhh shit. Six.” Mike sighed, sitting back as River shook his head. “Nothin man.” He said.

“Is there anyone sketchy out back? Have I noticed anything?” Vincent asked, reading through his notes.

“A worker came out, and kinda gave you this odd look. But he has probably seen weirder so he keeps going about his business.”

“I’m gonna pull out my pipe, act like I’m smoking or something and meander my way back to the front.”Vincent hummed. River nodded, and the group decided to team back up.

#a lil dnd for you guys #I love the so much #they deserve laughter and happiness #cyberpunk 2077 #cyberpunk college au #2023 vincent #vincent 2023 #vincent welles #tiny mike #cyberpunk tiny mike #mike kowalski #river ward #cyberpunk river #judy alvarez #cyberpunk judy #cyberpunk v #male v #male v cyberpunk

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crynkink · 1 year

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@laurelhell : bitch I’m dePRESSED

me: YAAAAASSSSSSSS

@laurelhell: bitch no actually Fr

me:

#LIKE LITERALLT BINCH I LOVE YOU AND IM SRSLY SO PROUD OF YOU FOR STARTING YOUR JOURNEY #YOU DESERVE THE PRAISEEEEE #AND I LOVE US CATCHING UPPP #my best Judy Fr

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hotvintagepoll · 14 days

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Propaganda

Judy Garland (Meet Me In St. Louis, A Star is Born, Summer Stock)— Judy is the GOAT when it comes to classic movie musicals. The voice of an angel who deserved so much better than she got. She can sing she can dance she can act she's a triple threat. Though she had a turbulent personal life (her treatment as a child star by the studio system makes me mad as hell like Louis b Mayer fight me ((she was made to believe that she was physically unattractive by the constant criticism of film executives who made her feel ugly and who manipulated her onscreen appearance by capping her teeth and using discs in her nose to change its shape and Mayer called her "my little hunchback" like imagine hearing that as a child and not having damage)) she always goddamn delivered on screen and in any performance she gave. She began in vaudeville performing with her sisters and was signed to MGM at 13. Starting out in supporting parts especially paired with mickey Rooney in a bunch of films (she's the best part tbh) she eventually transferred to the lead role. She is best known for her starring role in movie musicals like the iconic Wizard of Oz (somewhere over the rainbow still hits hard and is ranked the top film song of all time), meet me in St. Louis (Judy singing have your self a merry little Christmas brings tears to the eyes she is that powerful), the Harvey girls (she looks like a technicolor dream and sings a catchy af song about trains), Easter parade ( dancing and singing with Fred Astaire), for me and my gal, the pirate, and summer stock ( with pal Gene Kelly who she helped when he was starting out and he helped her when she was struggling). But she also does non- singing just as well like the clock ( her first movie where she sings no songs and is an underrated ww2 era romance), her Oscar nominated a star is born ( like the man that got away she put her whole soul in that and I have beef with the fact she lost to grace kelly ((whom I love but like still not even her best work)), and judgement at Nuremberg (a courtroom drama about the nazi war criminal trials). Outside of film she made concert appearances to record-breaking audiences, released 8 studio albums, and had her own Emmy-nominated tv series. She was the youngest (39) and first female recipient of the Cecil B DeMille award for lifetime achievement in the film industry. Girl was a lifelong democrat and was a financial and moral supporter of many causes including the civil rights movement (she was at the March on Washington and held a press conference to protest the 16th street Baptist church bombings). She was a friend of the Kennedy family and would call jfk weekly often ending the calls by singing the first few lines of somewhere over the rainbow (she thought of them as Gemini twins).She was a member of the committee for the first amendment which was formed in response to the HUAC investigations. Though she died far too young and tragically she remains an icon for her work and her life. As a girl who didn't feel like i was as pretty as everyone else I have always felt a connection to Judy and I just really love her.

Natalie Wood (West Side Story, The Great Race)—She went through so much shit which I know can be said for all these women but Natalie really was a star and her death often overshadows her career and life. She could make you cry, but she also had the capacity to be incredibly funny which I think is lost on people.

This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Natalie Wood:

Judy Garland:

Judy's voice alone qualifies her for at least top ten hottest HOT VINTAGE MOVIE WOMEN. She was a truly incredible swing singer, with a stunning voice on top of her technique. Her short dark hair looked incredible in just about any style. Have I mentioned her swagger? I can’t do it justice with words. She had swagger. She was funny as hell, and clever too. Incredibly charming and cool. I adore her.

Her eyes, her voice have bewitched me

I mean how can you beat the one and only Judy? She's beautiful, her smile is contagious, the way she sings with her whole body. You can't help but love her.

youtube

Beautiful woman, love her singing voice. And she can do everything between happy or silly and angry or heartbroken

#natalie wood #judy garland #hotvintagepoll #fuck that old woman #ladies 4 #Youtube

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punkpandapatrixk · 4 months

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🌟Blessings to Expect throughout 2024 ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card

‘You’re always here. What are you doing?’

‘Nothing…nothing in particular.’

‘You’re Saibara’s grandson, right? Aren’t you working at the Blacksmith shop?’

‘I’m not interested in that. I want to go back to the city.’

‘Oh… I came from the city, too. My dad moved the family to this village because he was going to study plants. I felt lonely at first. But the people here are all very kind.’

‘I don’t feel lonely. But I can’t find what I want to do in this village.’

‘What is it you want that you can’t find here?’

‘Well, it’s…oh, nothing…’

‘My mother always says that if you can’t find what you want to do, then do what you can see to do now. Nobody finds what they want immediately. But if you waste your time every day because of that, you’ll never find anything... To tell you the truth, I haven’t found what I’m looking for yet, either. See you.’

— Mary and Gray’s conversation from Harvest Moon: Back To Nature

SONG: Somewhere Over the Rainbow by Judy Garland

MOVIE: The Wizard of Oz (1939)

[PAC Masterlist] [Patreon] [Paid Readings]

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 1 – Welcoming Love, True Love

VIBE: Ready for Your Love (feat. MNEK) by Gorgon City

end of a struggle – King of Swords

You’ve been incredibly and marvellously responsible for…quite a number of years, I think? For some of you maybe a couple of months or so. But your struggles have ended; nearing ending; or you just haven’t realised yet how everything has changed for the better now. If you take a moment to really notice yourself, I’m sure you can tell just how much clearer you’ve become about many things pertaining to your surrounding and sense of Self. I feel you’ve worked really hard to overcome excessive trauma noises that have caused you a great deal of psychological pain.

Starting this year, you can feel more confident in your intellectual capacity to gauge situations right in front of you. Making choices will be a lot easier now because you’re clear about who you are as a person and what it is you truly want out of your own existence. You’ve clearly set enough boundaries with those who didn’t have your best interest. Seems to me you’ve learnt the hard way to be more selfish in the spirit of self-preservation. And so, the adventure of a lifetime begins right this moment.

In fact, I feel like your entire Life up until this point has been quite the adventure—only it has been filled with sorrow and misery, sorta. Surely it was your Hero’s Journey taking shape for the early chapters of your Life’s Story. A slow burn of a lifetime, if you will. Beginning this year, you’re entering the most exciting part of your rise to glory and everlasting happiness!

in your favour – 8 of Pentacles

You’ve been hustling behind the scenes for the most part. At least, those who aren’t close to you will never know just how much work you’ve put into bettering your world from the inside out. You worked so much on your mindset; you must’ve exercised a lot, too; tried to eat more cleanly and healthily; worked on your glow-up; brushed your skills; etc. You were investing in yourself for the future vision you’ve always held close to your heart. And for that reason, the seeds are now blooming.

You’re making me think of the bamboo plant. Did you know that a bamboo seedling takes around 5-7, maybe even 8-10, years to gestate underground? All alone in the dark without anyone knowing what’s going on down there. And when the seedling shoots up to the surface, the bamboo plant is famous for being the fastest growing plant there ever is.

So yeah~ fast or no fast in your mind, the point is that you’ve done the work on yourself and all the plans you’ve ever had for your Life. This year, 2+0+2+4=8, is the year you reap all the rewards and grow even faster from where you are now. Whatever undertaking you begin this year will gain traction super fast! Pat yourself on the back because when things get super good, you deserve to take a small break and just enjoy how far you’ve come~! Breathe~

catching stars – Page of Wands

Your Story is totally far from finished. With the Page aenergy—a kid’s aenergy—you’re only on the precipice of entering a Life of passion and purpose. You could almost say, it’s a new Story altogether just because this chapter of your Life is SO SO SO super good in comparison to the chapters about your struggles. I guess you’d call this a new arc huehue

You’re young Hercules now. Pretty soon, there will occur some big event that propels you into a bona fide hero, and then, you’ll meet your Megara~ This part of your Story is where you enter a circle of true—at least truer—friends and lovers who will motivate you throughout the next chapters of your Life. Sure, sure, struggles don’t just end, poof, like that and you will continuously need to learn to sift through these new breeds of friends and acquaintances. But that’s also part of your next level growing up, so don’t sweat the possibilities XD

Throughout 2024, you could be moving to a new environment and then meet new friends. Highkey you’re gonna be meeting Soulmates and Soul Fam members; these are the people who resemble you so much either on the inside or outside. These are people who think like you, care about the same things as you; basically you’re gonna finally feel like you truly belong somewhere on this Planet. Love is in the air because you’ve been giving so much Love to yourself before this point. You are Love. You emanate Love wherever you go because you love yourself, and thus you become a magnet for people who also will love you just as good~

APPLE STRUDEL🔻💛

honey lemon juice – Silver Magus (Merlin)

have a sweet time, honey – Priestess of Love

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 2 – Rising Up to Accept Yourself Wholly

VIBE: She Said from Kamikaze Girls

end of a struggle – Knight of Cups

You’ve kinda just gone through a death of a paradigm of sort. I feel that in the past, you simply didn’t really know who you were or what you were meant to be. This confusion of an identity was caused by your parents/caretakers not really appreciating you for who you were as a child or it could also be caused by your environment, race, culture, custom, tradition, stuff like that. It wasn’t your fault, you know. You literally grew up on your own and finally got clear about your own identity—you stopped caring if your real identity is too weird, too eccentric for this world.

Basically, you got tired of rejecting yourself. And you realised that you were doing that because you knew others wouldn’t accept you. Then you realised people are shitty and lame for the most part anyway, so you learnt to be OK with embracing all of your weird heart’s little desires. And you nurtured yourself and nurtured yourself until you rose above the lameness of most of Humanity. Did you know? You did the right thing, really. Through and through.

You’re definitely an Advanced Soul. I think even when you were a kid you always felt like there was some spirit/shadow parental figure walking behind you, guiding your thought processes. This older/bigger unseen figure was really just your own Higher Self, you know :D More than others would give you credit for, you’ve been such a good gal/boi for always listening to the guidance of your Higher Self~

in your favour – 3 of Pentacles

Beginning this year, you’re going to finally meet people who are similar to you. Similar as in, you’re going to meet a lot of colourful characters, really. People who also feel somewhat like society’s outcast. These people are going to come from various backgrounds and they will each have very interesting back stories and life experiences that will entertain you for a long time. These people could also have very strange, unusual hobbies that will spark your interest in new, alien pursuits.

With that said, this year could be the year you begin a new passion project of your own, with these people, new friends, you share a vision with. They do care about you and want to succeed together, so you can trust that these connections are going to bear sweet feelings for you. Most importantly, this year you’re going to know the sweet feeling of doing something meaningful with your natural talents born out of your innate interests. When you finally get the money, you will first and foremost taste gratitude from those who seem to love and enjoy what you do or have to offer~

Life really is getting better now because you’ve mustered the courage to explore your possibilities in all your eccentricity. Your Higher Self never meant for you to fit in anyway. You were always meant to be some sort of a genius trailblazer—a source of inspiration for the other lameass Humans who are too afraid to be themselves.

catching stars – 10 of Pentacles

What more can be said? On top of embracing yourself fully, loving yourself wholeheartedly, and meeting kindred spirits, you’re also going to gain a massive amount of money! Life’s always good when you have a lot of money! More money means a happier heart and more to share as well. But in your case, if you’ve chosen this Pile as your main pile, know that before a lot of money even trickles into your reality, it is the sense that you’re serving your Life Purpose what will make you feel rich.

After all, there could people reading this who came from a wealthy background and you may think you don’t crave or even care about money. Exactly. You never cared about a lack of money but didn’t you struggle with grounding yourself to this Reality because you didn’t know what you were put on Earth to do? This ‘10 of Pentacles sense of abundance’ encompasses a sense of material abundance that feels deserving; you can now feel worthy of getting paid for some passionate, incredible, show-stopping contribution you’ve made to society. Isn’t that such a wonderful feeling?

Some of you reading this could mend some broken bonds with family; some others could finally find a tribe—a Soul Family—and feel that you belong; some could start a family of your own with someone worthy of your high-grade affection. Congratulations~! You’ve really made it this far~ Things can only get better and better from here♥︎

APPLE STRUDEL🔻💗

honey lemon juice – Green Historian (Herodotus)

have a sweet time, honey – Priestess of Patience

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Pile 3 – Stepping On the Pedestal of Destiny

VIBE: Cheer Up, Charlie from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

end of a struggle – King of Pentacles

If you’ve chosen this as your main pile, I just know it that you’ve been working so hard on yourself, on a level that’s practically incomprehensible for most people. I’m sure you’ve survived so many deaths of the spirit—and perhaps even some of the more dramatic attempts. And you’ve come on top of your misery now. You’ve gotten healthier and clearer about where you’re going next. I sense sometimes you still doubt yourself but it isn’t a sin to doubt, it’s just a sign that you want to do well. And on so many levels, sometimes you’re afraid because you genuinely want this dream/vision to happen to you.

I assure you with this reading that you’re on the fast track towards a rendezvous with Destiny. Fast…is honestly relative to each Soul’s blueprint tho XD Time is on your side and what’s meant for you can’t miss you. So chillax, OK? One thing to know about this great dream/vision of yours is that you’re going to see it manifest because you’re different from the rest. Different in that you want to see it manifest to be of service to the rest! When you really think about it…

Don’t you just know from deep within your Soul that you’re deserving of this great destiny? It’s because you’re going to serve a massive purpose with it! So many people would benefit from your realising this dream. And that’s the very thing! You’ve been holding on to this vision, and you want it, because you’re MEANT for it.

in your favour – 4 of Cups

I’ll be referencing the 1971 ver. of Willy Wonka here. And honestly, I think you should watch it by the weekend or something because that movie’s whole vibe will feel tremendously validating to you, I sense hahah

Have you heard of the theories that say Charlie was literally singled out by Willy Wonka from the very beginning? That he had chosen all of those horrible brats because he wanted to punish, oops, teach them a lesson, and that principally he had been watching Charlie and wanted HIM to inherit the Chocolate Factory. If you watch the 1971 film you’ll literally get it! And with this 4 of Cups, know that that’s how the Universe feels about you stepping into your destiny. Willy Wonka, or God idk, doesn’t want anybody else but YOU to fulfil this role~!

You’ve literally been chosen and singled out by the Universe to win the grand prize! Just so you know, as I’m typing these words I literally have the Willy Wonka movie playing on another window and as I typed ‘grand prize’, the person in the movie is saying it right at the same time at around the 19:11 minute mark. Things can’t get any more synchronous than that!🤯

This year, you’ll really see how every single thing is going to work out in your favour. And knowing the inner work you’ve done on yourself, I’m sure you’re spiritually mature enough to sense, to notice every small nudge that tells you what you need to do at a given time😊New adventures are just around the corner, baby~!

catching stars – 5 of Pentacles

So you see, how is 5 of Pentacles appearing for a segment about you catching stars? This is, in fact, reaffirming that your dream come true will also serve as a salve for those who are wounded and hurting. You really are a medicine for this sick world. This year, you’re going to see serendipitous events and meetings what will open the door towards the physical manifestation of your dream Reality. Once you step on to the pedestal of Destiny, there’s no stopping you. You’ll be moving so fast it drives you mad!

This card is also saying you must be careful of possible leeches coming towards you; it’s best to use caution and discernment when revealing to others your plans and goals. Be stingy with information as per your gut instinct’s nudges, OK? Be mature enough to know not everybody will be happy at the prospect of your massive success that could potentially change Mankind. People get envious of such ideas, alright? Be careful not to hit the already low self-esteem of some people around you LMAO

I also feel that this year you will begin new routines that benefit your health and physical strength. If this is something you’ve been working on, you will see this year that the implementation of these routines feels more natural and effortless. You’ve managed to master your thoughts, emotions, and time management—or soon to do. Money will also come more abundantly, so all your basic needs are easily met. You’ve become a magnet for good luck—or soon to notice you’ve done so!🍀

APPLE STRUDEL🔻🧡

honey lemon juice – Red Astronomer (Johannes Kepler)

have a sweet time, honey – Priestess of Innocence

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

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blondephenobarbitol · 7 months

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TSH hot takes 🔥

-Julian was actually a dick. He isolated and groomed vulnerable students (do you think it's a coincidence that every single member of the greek class had a difficult home life?) into thinking that these very outdated concepts of love and power were good for them. He compared their dangerous behaviour to that of ancient gods. Then, rather than face the consequence of his actions and take accountability, he left when it mattered.

-Charles was an asshole, but he's not a scapegoat. You cannot blame all the problems on Charles, he was an addict as a result of his trauma. He needed help. This doesn't excuse him from his actions, but it explains them. At the beginning of the book he physically could not bring himself to hurt Camilla. He's not a "bad" person. He's a sick person.

-Bunny didn't deserve to die, but he was also probably going to condemn the group at some point. He didn't just die for no reason. (Believing that Bunny's death was truly pointless also means believing that Henry was an actual psychopath who killed his friend for shits and giggles.)

-Judy, Cloke and Sophie ended up the happiest. That is literally the moral of the book. Judy wasn't all tortured when Richard didn't want to hang out with her, she shook it off and kept living her life. That's literally the point.

-Richard was never in love with Camilla. He loved the idea of her, but didn't see her as a person. Because of this specific dynamic and the fact the Richard is narrating, we know nothing about her actual personality. Anything he says can be disputed, and a lot of it contradicts itself.

-Francis is not blameless or unproblematic, but of the group he probably had the best intentions. Most of his behaviour that can be interpreted as creepy can be chalked up to Richard's internalized homophobia (remember, everything is told from his point of view, and Francis was a gay man in the 80's) When you look objectively at what Francis did, you see that he made a pass, got rejected, then dropped it and moved on. There is (i think) one more attempt made later on in the book, and that is furthered by Richard and only interrupted when Charles shows up.

-Henry may be the metaphorical representative of death when talking about the book, but in the narrative it's important to remember he's also just a person. Otherwise everything he does seems beyond question, and he's assigned this label as just "evil." He was 21!! Literally still a kid

-There were not good or bad characters. The reason they hit so hard is because each of them are so layered. They all have good traits and bad traits, but calling one "evil" takes away their humanity and dismisses their complexity that makes them so great.

#the secret history #tsh #donna tartt #charles macaulay #camilla macaulay #henry winter #richard papen #bunny corcoran #francis abernathy #judy poovey #booklr #hot take

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sserpente · 1 year

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A/N: Happy Easter to everyone who celebrates! ♥ Some naughty President Loki action seems like a fitting Easter gift to me, what do you think? Also, I’m proud to announce there’s an actual Easter egg in this Imagine that may or may not have something to do with my upcoming English novel… Enjoy, everyone!

Words: 2616 Warnings: assassin!Reader, violence, dub-con, smut

One and a half million—as a deposit. That’s how much you demanded to see in your secret bank account before you had even considered going anywhere near what used to be Stark Tower and now acted as a base for him. Loki. President Loki.

You didn’t particularly care who you were supposed to kill, nor who hired you to do it. Governments were corrupted all over the world—there was not a single politician who didn’t act in his own interests rather than the people’s. You were only in it for the money.

President Loki, however… he was different. That man was a god with abilities you wouldn’t even dare dream of as a mere human. Your raised fee would reflect the danger you’d put yourself in if you accepted this mission. And then once the God of Mischief was dead, you’d be ten million dollars richer.

You were the best of the best—you got hired when the job needed to get done. You doubted that anyone else would be capable of sending Loki straight to hell. Or was it Helheim? He was a Norse god, after all. Surely, there was some eternal hellfire reserved for the likes of him.

But then again, you weren’t exactly a saint either. You murdered for money, never questioning whether the person whose life you were going to end was innocent or not. Granted, most of them were not and had red on their ledger one way or another but occasionally… occasionally, they did not deserve to die.

You were pretty certain that Loki did though. He wasn’t the worst ruler this world had ever seen but at the end of the day… he was an alien king forcing humans into submission. You wouldn’t bow to anyone, you thought, as you polished the sharp and hidden blade inside your lipstick. The job was messier when you chose it as your weapon but with Loki, you’d have to be sure. A slit throat would ensure he was truly dead and for that, you would have to get up close.

This time, your approach was going to be a little… unconventional. You had thought about it for a long time—and you had come to the conclusion that there was no other way to get into that tower without getting killed yourself before making it even anywhere near Loki.

Judy Magenta. That was the made-up name you had used to register for the escort service to receive legal identification for offering Loki… your time. It had taken quite a few naughty pictures to lure him in, along with a bought recommendation from another escort girl one of Loki’s lackeys booked regularly.

You had to admit, you did feel a little silly putting on that green glittery cocktail dress after tossing your lipstick knife into your clutch. The black high heels were a lovely touch though. You’d keep them after this job, as a trophy.

“You’re here to… entertain the president tonight?” The bulky bald man who escorted you to the lifts after the taxi driver dropped you off right in front of Stark Tower licked his lips when his greedy gaze travelled up and down your V-shaped cleavage.

“I am,” you gave back with a sweet smile, batting your eyelashes at him all the while you imagined kicking him in the balls until he howled for his mummy. You could tell he kept staring at your body and your rather revealing outfit during the ride up to the penthouse but, for the sake of keeping in mind you were not really an escort girl, you elected to ignore it and said nothing.

President Loki was standing at his bar surrounded by power-hungry politicians eager for his attention. Dressed in a black suit with a green tie and those golden horns on his head, he turned to face you with a glass filled with what you presumed was bourbon in his hand. He lifted his chin in a curious manner, his blue eyes narrowing just a little.

“Mr President…” the bulky bouncer began. “Uh… this is…”

“Judy. Judy Magenta. Your company for the night?” you offered. The bouncer let out a relieved breath.

“Ahh… just in time. I was just about to call it a day.” Loki’s voice was smooth, charming. He had a way with words, you had to give him that. Under different circumstances, you’d even admit that he was outrageously attractive. He was a god, after all. That must have been the reason.

You didn’t know if he’d done this before—or if he’d done it back on Asgard but at the end of the day, it didn’t matter, right? You were only doing this because it would give you the perfect opportunity to get just close enough to kill him and get this over with. Pleasure had no place here.

“Gentlemen… I will see you tomorrow. And you…” His blue eyes fixated on you, involuntarily sending shivers up and down your spine. “…why don’t you wait for me in my bedroom? I will be joining you shortly.”

You almost scoffed. So formal… if the sex was going to be anything like that… ugh. Well, most men with a big ego disappointed under the sheets.

Nodding, you made your way over to the door he pointed at and slid inside, taking in the furniture. A king-size bed with green sheets, of course, hundreds of books on shelves towering up all the way to the ceiling, and a neat desk armed with ink and a green and gold quill. It was very old-fashioned but a surprisingly comfortable room, you decided, as you threw your clutch on the bed.

You’d come prepared. Condoms, lube, even a cock ring. Whatever would tickle his fancy before you’d draw your little knife for a different kind of climax. By the time his lackeys would notice he was dead, you would be long gone. You were wearing a wig tonight as well, along with some coloured contacts to conceal your identity. Life as an assassin was a dangerous and lonely one but you were pretty used to it.

You flipped around when you heard the door open, forcing a fake smile. Loki had removed his horns now, and swapped his suit for a more comfortable outfit. In fact, he was shirtless, putting his pale but trained chest and arms on display. He wasn’t as shredded as Thor but the God of Thunder had never been your type anyway. Loki on the other hand… remember, no pleasure!

Your feigned smile widened as you turned around and moved your fake hair out of the way. “Help me undress?” You felt his presence behind you after a few silent steps, his soft fingers ghosting over your back to unzip you.

Needless to say, you had relinquished wearing any underwear tonight even though you did carry a spare pair of knickers in your clutch just in case. Once he slid the green dress off of your body and you stepped out of it, you turned back around, trailing your fingers over his abs.

“Ready for some fun, Mr President?”

“Loki will suffice, pet,” he replied. Pet? Oh, of course. Complete and utter submission. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at him and instead, took his hands in yours and started walking backwards until you could lie down on his bed, pulling him on top of you.

You had to admit, you quite enjoyed how hungrily he glared at your naked body, his blue eyes wandering over every single inch of bare skin as if he was a demon you had summoned and now aimed to please in exchange for his power. The bulge in his trousers grew quickly as he hovered above you.

“Loki,” you repeated, testing his name on your tongue. Then, you reached for your clutch on his bed, pulling out the lube.

“And what’s that when it’s at home?” he asked, eyeing the bottle in your hands suspiciously.

You smiled at him. “Lube will make this experience more enjoyable for the both of us, Loki.”

The God of Mischief frowned. You blinked at him when he began to chuckle as if you’d just told him a hilarious joke.

“I can guarantee you, we will not need it, pet.” You were about to protest when he cupped your cunt with his hand all of a sudden, two fingers lightly stroking over your outer lips. You dropped the small bottle the moment his thumb found your clit, applying just enough pressure to ignite… arousal. He knew what he was doing. You realised that the moment he bent down to pepper your neck with hot kisses and teasing licks, his digits working their magic. He had you wet and ready for him within minutes of this delicious treatment. Fuck… you were not supposed to be enjoying this!

“There we go… it seems your body thinks we don’t need your lube either…”

You gasped for air when he slid two fingers inside of you, curling them at your g-spot. Your hips were bucking up to meet his hand against your will the moment the slick sounds of him fingering you echoed through the silent bedroom.

“Oh… fuck…” That felt good. You couldn’t quite remember the last time you had taken a minute to masturbate. That… that must have been why. You hadn’t had sex in so long that Loki exploring your soaking pussy had you writhing because of your celibate lifestyle.

His dark chuckle went directly between your legs too. And it was only then you realised that his trousers had disappeared into thin air, willed away by magic. You could feel his hard length pressing against your inner thigh, eager to claim you. Much to your own surprise… you wanted him to.

“C-Condom…” you choked out panting. But your reward was Loki removing his fingers from your cunt to instead snatch your wrists and pin them down above your head to render you all but helpless beneath him.

“A condom? I don’t think so, pet…” And with that, he forced himself between your legs and used his free hand to guide himself into your waiting hole. Inch by inch, Loki pushed forward, sheathing his girth inside you until he’d claimed you to the brim. His growl made you moan as he filled you so deliciously well that you believed your pussy was made for him.

When he started moving, you almost forgot why you were here. Loki withdrew almost entirely and then began rutting into you like there was no tomorrow. He fucked the assassin right out of you—for when your eyes rolled to the back of your head, he made sure to attack your neck yet again.

Moaning, you arched your back, your breasts brushing against his bare chest with every single thrust of his and fuck, this man knew how to use his tool. Each and every stroke drove you further to what already felt like the best orgasm of your life as the sound of sex and skin slapping against skin filled the room.

“I can feel you tightening around me, pet. Cum. Beg me for my seed,” Loki growled into your ear. You wanted to disobey him—wanted to disobey that commanding tone, that entitled smugness. But you couldn’t. Loki played you like an instrument, taking that delicious climax from you whether you wanted to give it to him or not.

You came around him with a moan, your toes curling and your walls pulsing around him, doing just what he had asked you to do. Your cunt was begging for his seed. He was merciful tonight. Loki reached his own peak with a low growl only moments later, filling you up and staining your walls until it came oozing out of you.

Fuck… fuck, fuck, fuck, that arsehole had screwed you without a condom! Only now that you came back to your senses did you realise what you had let him do. Okay, don’t freak out… you can get a morning-after pill as soon as you are out the door. You’d ruin everything if you lashed out at him now. Besides… Loki was still hard—and it did not seem like he was going to tire any time soon.

It was three a.m. when he finally let you rest. Your pussy was sore, his cum leaking from almost all of your openings. He’d made you cum for him at least six more times before you’d lost count and now… now he was sound asleep next to you.

Time to strike.

As quiet as a mouse so you wouldn’t wake him up, you reached for your clutch that had at some point fallen to the floor, retrieving your lipstick knife. Then, you climbed on top of him, revealing the blade in the dark. You could barely make out his features with the curtains drawn but your eyes were trained to work in the shadows.

You gripped your weapon tighter, ready to slit his throat.

“I wonder…”, he mused with a start. You froze. “I wonder how much money you were offered to try.” He’s awake. “Are you going to tell me, pet?”

Your heart was beating so fast you worried it would jump straight out of your chest. Your paralysis lasted for only a second too long. By the time you reacted to finish what you’d started and kill him, he’d already overwhelmed you. Loki snatched your wrist so harshly you were forced to drop your weapon. He flipped you both over so you came to lie on the bed beneath him, his face only inches from yours. You winced when he ripped the wig off of you.

“Now… I’m impressed. You went to considerable lengths to get close to me. But you see, pet, I am the God of Mischief. I’m not easily tricked.” Cold shivers ran up and down your spine when he proceeded to call you by your real name. “But I must admit,” he went on, “that I am also a little disappointed. You know the punishment for attempted assassination of your king, do you not?”

Death. Execution. You swallowed thickly. How had he found out? He’d known. He’d known this entire time you were no real escort girl and still… he’d still fucked you! You gnashed your teeth, narrowing your eyes at him with anger usurping your growing fear.

“It’s a shame, really… you would make such a fine pet. Hmm…” He paused, burying his face in your neck and inhaling your scent deeply. “I think I’m going to keep you.”

Your eyes widened. “Kill me or let me go, Loki. I’m not playing your stupid games.”

“Oh, but you will, pet. You better get used to your new surroundings. You won’t be leaving any time soon.”

He made you moan involuntarily when he pushed inside of you without any forewarning. You hadn’t even realised he’d gotten hard again.

“Now…” he mused. “How much was it?” His lazy strokes made you even angrier—it felt good. Too fucking good.

“Ten… million,” you spat through gritted teeth.

“Ahh… well, I hope the money was worth your freedom. Because you are mine now, my little assassin.”

You wanted to punch him, scratch him and bite him, to wipe that mischievous smirk from his face. But you couldn’t. Not right now anyway—Loki kept rutting into you until you were sure to lose consciousness. My little assassin… you hated the depraved and lascivious part of you that enjoyed the idea of him keeping you as a pet.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow you’d finish your mission, right after… right after you’d let him give you another orgasm. You’d… find a way… surely…

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kibo-ichiro · 5 months

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Have a fluffy headcanon because we all need it

Judith, like her father, has gift giving as her love language. So one day, she makes some matching bracelets for her and her parents. Each necklace has two red beads to represent Callisto and Judy’s eyes, and a turquoise bead for Penelope. They also have little charms on them: a golden dragon, a rose, the sun, moon, and a little star.

Callisto is overjoyed at the gift, immediately having preservation spells put on the bracelets. Everyone he meets later that day has to deal with Callisto showing off the bracelet and gushing about Judith more than usual:

“But just look at what Judith made for me and Penelope, isn’t it beautiful?“

“Yes, Your Majesty. You’ve shown us three times already today.”

“Well, now you get to see it again, my daughter’s creativity deserves to be shown off—“

Penelope is also very happy for the gift, all the servants noting how often she’ll get distracted from paperwork or a book just to look at the bracelet. A soft smile lighting up her face as she gently rubs at a charm between her fingers. (She also finds Callisto’s enthusiasm hilarious, but does have to reign him in at times. Even though when she sees her husband smiling so genuinely, she can’t help but give him a quick kiss that quickly gets out of hand because Callisto can’t help himself.)

Every time Judith gets another sibling, she adds a bead to match their eye color and another star charm. She makes them bracelets as well when they get a bit older.

#callisto regulus #penelope eckhart #judith regulus #penelope x callisto #calliope #villains are destined to die #vadd #vadd headcanon #death is the only ending for the villainess #ditoeftv #ditoeftv headcanon #headcanons #fluff #fluffy headcanons

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wexhappyxfew · 11 days

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hiya shannon hope youre doing well 😚 now ill let you pick the pairing because i actually haven't watched mota yet (which is treason and all, i know), but can't miss out on a chance to read some of your amazing writing. i thought these prompts were interesting:

3. “Tell me to leave and I’ll never bother you again.”

29. “Don’t lie to me. I was there.”

xoxo hope to hear back from you soon and can't wait to read!

HI FRIEND!!!! i hope you're doing well toooo!! thank you so much for stopping by! awe it's no worries, you know that!! i always say watch when you can or want haha!! :D you're too kind, friend, thank you for the love and support and i hope it lives up to it!!! i picked my OC Judy Rybinski and who she is ~eventually~ paired up with, a fav of favs, Robert 'Rosie' Rosenthal, who i have a few more pieces for as well posted and coming in the next few days!! and, i went with the first prompt offered (#3) as it fit the vibes more here! these two have my HEART! and i hope this piece captures that too :) (also: i will absolutely be getting back to you soon my friend hehe 🥹🫶✨)

let it linger

(a/n): for the judy x rosie girlies again - giving you all the soft, slightly awkward and nervous vibes there is, with a hint of that eagerness and excitement as we near the end of the war! and judy gets a promotion (which she deserves and earns), so please enjoy that! plus, enjoy the slight hint of the imagery of a swan above! they're beautiful!! :D also....just incase i didn't mention it anywhere else (and thinking back i probably didn't) after some of the silver bullets girls get split up, judy gets a position as rosie's turret ball gunner on rosie's riveters!!

"Lieutenant Rybinski, that has a ring to it."

Lieutenant Judy Rybinski. In her eyes, it really did. Lieutenant Rybinski - with her new crusher cap, A-2 jacket fit to the length of her arms and rather tiny form, the Lieutenant bar on her lapel, and the new level of standards she seemed to hold herself to. Judy looked up from underneath that shiny new crusher cap at Rosie Rosenthal and grinned.

"You think?" she asked him with a chuckle, crossing her arms as they approached the mess hall, "I'll be honest, Rosie, I didn't expect it. They don't do that sorta thing real often around here it seems. I know Francis just got the big promotion, but I don't know…." Judy shrugged, "a ball turret gunner doesn't see that sorta stuff." Rosie watched her for a moment, before breaking out into a wide grin and stopping in the path and turning to her, his hands placed firmly on his hips.

"A ball turret gunner like yourself deserves to see that sort of stuff." he said, and then offered her a wink to which she gave him a look. Judy gasped.

"You know something, don't you," she said, leaning forward and popping his shoulder lighting with a finger of hers, "c'mon, spill, what is it?" Rosie watched her and shook his head.

"I just think that Operations really has seen the lengths you've gone in the line of duty," Rosie said with a gentle smile, "your leadership skills, your capability to remain calm under pressure, stepping up to the plate. How you had to come up outta the ball turret and take on tail gunner for the second half of a mission. That sorta stuff doesn't just happen. Some people panic, some stall up. You jumped right in." Judy watched him.

"How would anyone know….?" Judy started, trailing off after his spiel, only to grin like a loon and drop her jaw, when she saw him grinning like he always did.

"It was YOU." Judy managed in a mixture of gasping-whispering-and-excitedly-yelling, before placing her hands on her reddening cheeks and grinning, "You didn't have to!" Rosie laughed lightly and shook his head, before stepping forward and placing his hands on her shoulders comfortably, like they'd been there all her life, his presence both warm and kind.

"I know how hard you work, Judy," Rosie said quietly, the feel of his gaze on her both pleasant and peaceful all at once, "I got mixed up in a conversation with Jack Kidd, he brought up the Silver Bullets, and….well, I couldn't help but bring you up." Couldn't….help? Judy was probably red in the face, but she didn't mind. He couldn't help but bring her up?

"You got that look on your face," Rosie said quietly with a chuckle, "I know you don't like the spotlight, but when people do what you've done, you deserve it." Judy stared at him, fighting back a bit of pent-up emotions that have been living inside her body for months. Despite her feelings towards Rosie as a whole (which had continually grown deeper without fail and had been increasingly harder to hide), and her emotions towards the war (which were ever-present), having someone like himself, taking away her emotions towards him, recognize what she's done, and what her sacrifice has been, made her want to have a breakdown.

"People don't usually tell me that sort of thing," Judy said softly back to him, smiling up at him with her rosy cheeks, "so thank you." Thank you for seeing me, like you always do, Judy thought to herself. Rosie smiled at her genuinely, and then squeezed her shoulders.

"It's always my pleasure, Jude, you know that." Rosie said tenderly, before dropping his hands from her shoulders and crossing his arms, nodding to the mess hall, "Ready for breakfast?" She nodded, but felt rooted in place, eyes somewhere towards the ground.

"You okay?" he asked her, reaching forward and bumping a pointer finger lightly under her chin as she looked up towards him, his hands going back to his hips. The longer she stared at him, the more she couldn't contain her thoughts inwards.

"You're really amazing you know?" Judy managed out, with a nod, "And you've probably been told that a million times, by a bunch of guys, as well as a bunch of girls wanting to have your last name, but, genuinely Rosie, meeting you has meant everything to me. Please know that." Rosie watched her, his turn to get rooted in place as a silence fell around them. Judy's cheeks grew a darker red just as the realization of what she had said to him and she suddenly wanted to take it all back with that look on his face.

"I…" Judy started, "listen, tell me to leave and I'll never bother you again, but, you do so much for me and everyone else around you and you put so much of yourself out there to better others and help other people. And you make sure people are cared for and comforted and doing well and are healthy, which damn, I barely look out for my own health, and you just…" Judy fell at a lose for words as Rosie stood there soaking in her jumbled mess of speech that he was definitely trying to decode in some sort of way. There she goes again, just saying whatever came to mind, right in front of Rosie Rosenthal, her emotions edging her on even more so in recent days it seemed.

Even if all he saw were friendship between them and they'd never be able to explain what all those touches and lingering looks were for whatever was to come, he'd know that she thought he was incredible and someone who has genuinely changed her life. He'd know that for as long as he lived, even it meant embarrassing herself until the point she was red in the face. She noted his slightly red cheeks and the wheels working in his head to speak.

"Thank you, Judy," Rosie said quietly with a nod, catching her gaze as she stared at him, whatever was swimming in his eyes enough to get a smile on her face, at the way he seemed breathless enough without words to stand there in front of her and look at her like that, "it's the right thing to do. Here. Right now. In the world. Help people. Make them know they're an important part in all of this. I….wow, bit of a loss for words, Jude." Judy watched him and then smiled grandly up at him.

"You take a minute to catch your breath," she whispered, before stepping forward and pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek, where she might've lingered a little longer than needed, but the spark of connection with that gentle touch was enough to keep her boldly functioning, "I'll meet you at the mess hall." Pulling back she looked at him and so up close, she could see every bit of his eye that you never saw from far away, and it made her smile softly within his general gaze, enough to keep him smiling, himself.

"Even if there are a lot of girls who'd like my last name," Rosie started, referencing her rather bold display of emotions, "none of them have ever kissed my cheek like that."

Judy froze up as she stared at him, her heart pounding so loud in her ears, she swore she had imagined that last part. She stared at him, swallowing her words and thoughts to try and get her body functioning and looked up into his eyes again.

"Maybe because none of them ever had the courage to really get to know you," she whispered back, holding his gaze like a sun to the moon, "and know how much you deserve to be loved like that." And then Judy was stepping away from him, trying to tell herself not to regret every word she was saying, spilling out of her mouth in that moment.

They could go down any day of the week - she was done watching her friends fall in love and then get their hearts torn out of their chests. She was done with the war getting what it wanted. She was tired of people letting the war take away the one thing that was ever-present. Love. Even if it meant a few bold, rather embarrassing forms of half-confessions and awkward, nervous laughter.

And Rosie.

Rosie deserved to know. She just had to find the courage to tell it straight to his face all these feelings she had wrapped up deep inside of her. For now, she'd let those thoughts linger longer.

Maybe.

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xamiipholia · 3 months

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Carolyn Petit killing it as always. If you're not familiar with her work, I strongly recommend it! She's a wonderful writer and from one highly opinionated trans woman to another I always find her work insightful and deeply resonant even if I don't always agree. I think her post-game essay on The Last of Us Part 2 is essential reading on the game.

Anyway.

I'm wary of the word 'representation' but this- this is why we *do* need it. We need havens. We need art that reaches out and lets us know we are seen and loved - that we have a place in the world that in many ways feels increasingly hostile towards us.

We need stories like Baulder's Gate 3 and Mass Effect that let us carve our own paths and find connections that feel true. We need stories like Hades and Life is Strange: True Colors with strongly and lovingly defined bi characters with resonant arcs. We need stories like The Last of Us Part II that are about queer and trans becoming, finding refuge in each other and holding on to that as long as we can - unshakable bonds of love in a world that is collapsing at the seams and ready to pull us apart without mercy. We need lesbian women like Judy Alvarez who are painted with such crystal clarity and compassion while also being an absolute dumpster fire like so many of us are. We need stories like Horizon Burning Shores that arrive as politicians are trying to excise us from public life and dare to show us finding each other in a beautiful, reborn future and parting with the hope of what we could be someday.

We need all of this. We need more of this - stories that let us find our own way and bespoke, curated narratives. Stories that let us know we have a place in the world.

We don't get enough. We need more. And - I don't have the experience to speak on this with authority as it is not my lived experience but please feel free to reblog and add on - our mlm bros ABSOLUTELY do not get enough representation. Judy's story in Cyberpunk is, in my opinion, one of the best wlw romances in gaming but male V's romance with Kerry can't even be unlocked until a hidden 4th act of the game that isn't even available until you have the point of no return available to you. THAT - that's not cool. We need to do better. Our boys deserve better. We need rep that isn't lopsided.

Anyway thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

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creedslove · 10 months

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DESERVE IT - CHAPTER 17

Javier Peña x f!reader

Summary: Things go a lot better than Javier had predicted in Washington, but it's time to leave Colombia behind and go home, at the same time you can't leave Colombia, which makes you take a risky decision

Warnings: angst, sad!Javi, incorrect narcos plot, mentions of masturbation, smut (phone sex hihihi), dirty talk, sad!reader, an old character returns, fluff

A/N: I'm not gonna say much as I'm very tired because I just finished this chapter and I wrote A LOT today, but I loved this chapter, I feel I wrote my heart into this chapter and I hope you besties enjoy it as much as I did

• PART ONE TO SIXTEEN ON MY MASTERLIST

5.6k words

"¡Por fin, cayó!"

Javier's heart sank when he heard these words through the TV. It was his fourth or fifth scotch, he had already lost track of it, as there was nothing else to do in that place other than get drunk and worry about what the future held for him. His meeting with the board would be in two days, and Javi had received no other instruction besides a warning not to leave town. He didn't know if he would have to get himself a lawyer, maybe he should have already done it, the interview with Judy Moncada hit like a bomb and the media was pressing the American government which pressed the DEA and it became a vicious circle. It actually came in handy as the investigations around Escobar's location tightened and as far as Javi had heard, they were very close to catching him. He looked around the shady bar he was in and saw a few beautiful women having their drinks. If it were at any other moment of his life, he would approach some of them with his charm and woo them to bed.

But that was before you.

Now, even if he tried picking up a girl on purpose, he wouldn't be able to do it, you had put him under a spell, you were the only one who crossed his mind at all times of the day, your face was the last thing he saw before falling asleep and the first thing to appear when he woke up. His heart raced to think of you, the moments you two spent together, the way you'd smile at him, kiss his lips, how your laughter was his favorite sound in the world - second favorite, as the first one had to be your moans - and the way your face lit up when he proposed to you, how you'd said yes without even thinking and when he officially got on his knees and gave you the ring, you teared up and said yes once again, because that would always be your answer to him.

He also deeply missed your body, he had memorized your curves, your freckles and your weak spots. Night after night he fucked his own fist thinking of you, it wasn't enough, it didn't compare to actually having you there, it offered him such a bittersweet relief because once the bliss of his orgasm faded, he turned to an empty spot in his bed. It lacked your warmth, your smell, your body. He missed holding you, he missed how you'd run your fingers through his hair, how you'd sit on his lap to have breakfast. Even if he wrote to you, called you, heard your voice, it wasn't the same. He could spend hours on the phone talking to you, and it wouldn't be enough, as soon as you hung up the emptiness he felt returned at full intensity.

Javier had never felt like that for any woman, but he felt that for you, he was sure he was under your spell, but he never wanted to break free from it.

However, at that moment Javier's heart was broken; he couldn't believe that after so many years of dedication and hard work he'd missed the capture and killing of the most wanted man in the world. After so much he'd given to the government and to Colombia, he had been forced to watch it from afar, as his entire career was going to be decided by a bunch of suited men who never raised their asses of their comfortable cushioned chairs and taken a look at what the real world of drugs was like.

Javi finished his liquor and paid for it, placing his jacket back on and heading towards the end. He wanted to call you, he wanted to hear your voice and make sure you were alright. That night was just one of those nights where the pang in his chest was too intense, he missed you to the point it felt like his skin burned. Truth to be told, he didn't want to call you over the phone, he wanted to have you there, with him, sharing a bed, sleeping together, kissing and fucking. He craved your presence and your body, but for that moment, a telephone call would be the closest he would get from you. However, he would call you from his hotel room, he wanted privacy to talk to you, he needed the comfort of a bed, a pillow under his head so he could pretend things were okay again. Where he'd close his eyes while you spoke with your sweet, gentle voice and he could pretend you were just a room away from him, taking long in the bathroom for instance, before you would appear wearing nothing but his shirt just for him.

At that moment, there was another call Javier had to make, so he searched his pickets to find some coins he could use in the phone booth. He needed to get a hold of Steve in order to know everything about Pablo's death. He'd seen it through the tv but it was obvious it wasn't the same as witnessing history writing itself. You could offer him some juicy details in a few weeks, once you worked on your reports to send it over to the government, then you'd be organizing your own report, based on the cops' reports and accounts who took part in the mission, just as the necropsy reports too.

All in all, you would have a ton shit of work and you would have to compile probably thousands of pages, to the point Messina would probably have to send over a team of people to help you. Peña knew how stressed you were, about the whole Pablo Escobar and about his own situation as well. He hated that he caused you to stress over what was probably going to happen to him, and if he could, he would abduct you from that chaotic life and take you to his ranch, so you two could get married and live your life in peace. He got lost in his thoughts that were all about you and nearly forgot what he was doing when Steve's voice was heard on the other side of the line.

After Javi had the confirmation he would have to go to Washington, he'd had a conversation with Steve and the two of them apologized to each other and went back to being friends, under the condition imposed by Javier: Murphy would have to take care of you while Javi was gone.

He skipped the usual greetings and went straight for the account of what happened the day they caught Escobar, not sparing any details; he told Javier everything that happened that day until they took the infamous photograph of Escobar's dead body.

The burning feeling of jealousy and envy took over Javi's body even if he fought them as hard as he could, he couldn't believe himself when he felt that, he should be happy, his friend managed to catch Colombia's boogeyman and they probably made things a little bit better to the world, and yet there he was, standing inside of a phone booth sulking like a teenage girl because he couldn't be a part of it. It was pathetic and he felt ridiculous, but he also felt he deserved to be there, he'd given so much of himself to that, and he deserved to have shot Escobar at least once.

"So, how's Y/N doing?" Javi asked after Steve finished narrating his part of the story, after all, you were still the most important thing that lingered on his mind the entire time, he heard Steve's sigh and felt his heart clench.

"You know… she's doing alright, she's strong, she's been working a lot, Connie talks to her everyday and well, she misses you and she's worried, but she knows the two of you need to be patient" he told his friend "and for her sake, I also hope you are keeping your dick in your pants, Javi"

Javier laughed as he could hear the smirk in his friend's voice and ran his thumb over his eyebrow "fuck you Murphy" he said before hanging up.

Javi lit up a cigarette - because he avoided smoking them around you, as he didn't want you to breathe his smoke, but now he was away from you he felt miserable and he figured he deserved at least a puff - and walked back to his hotel.

He was gonna lie in his bed, call you and give zero fucks about how expensive long-distance calls were and pretend he didn't hear your voice breaking while you tried to hold your tears at the same time you pretended you didn't cry whenever you talked about him and the uncertainty of your future together.

•••

Javier licked his lips as he tensely walked through the hallway. He didn't know what was going to happen to him, but he knew it wasn't good. Just two days before, he had called Steve wanting to know everything about Pablo Escobar's death. It'd been a few days since the task force formed by the DEA, CIA and the Colombian police managed to take down the most wanted man in the world.

Even if Javier still felt bitter about it, he was also relieved to see each time he grabbed a newspaper or he tuned into the news channel, the DEA scandal about a long term agent associating with a death squad was replaced by the joy and glory of the US government of having ended the kingdom of terror of Escobar. As he placed his fingers between his tie and his neck, pulling them a little in order to create some space and subdue the feeling of being suffocated, that's all he tried keeping in mind as nervousness flooded through him. He was about to have his life decided, he could be fired, go to jail, go back as if nothing had happened, and the fact he had absolutely no clue which turn his life would take was nerve-wracking.

He was told to get inside the conference room by a very rude secretary and rolled his eyes. She had no idea who she was talking to, he was Javier Peña, former charmer of secretaries. If he hadn't been tamed by a gorgeous girl back in Colombia he would make sure to lean towards her desk and work his charms on her until she was giggling and blushing only to invite her for a few drinks and after fucking her, leave her in bed. Javier was a gentleman and he didn't think doing that to women was alright, but under those circumstances he figured an entitled bitch like that deserved it. He chuckled to himself at the realization you were the only one he would love to invite for some drinks, take to bed but instead of leaving in the morning, he'd make sure to hold you tight the whole night, so he'd wake up with you. It ached to think of the distance between the two of you, so he just sat down and gulped, tense to know what was going to happen.

He nervously tapped his fingers on the table as a group of suited men walked into the room and took the chairs in front of him.

With no introductions or whatsoever, one of the men grabbed a file and read out loud the report about Pablo Escobar's death. It highlighted all the positive enforcement the american government received and how positive it was for their image, Javier breathed heavily and shifted uncomfortably on his seat, staring at the man and having absolutely no clue why he was blabbering about that at all.

"Do I need a lawyer?" He asked and saw as the other members of the board laughed softly.

"Agent Peña, a lawyer is not required for the occasion. You see, morale was hanging low once Miami Herald published that controversial interview, causing us a series of inconveniences, hence why you've been called here. However, as your team managed to catch Escobar, things changed, and we are all willing to forget about your… incident, let's put it that way, with Los Pepes" anyone could see the relief in Javier, as his shoulders immediately relaxed and the tension slowly floated away, he knew it was too soon to celebrate but thing we're going way better than he anticipated.

"Still… after a long conversation with our Ambassador in Colombia, we came to the conclusion you need to take some time off from the dangers of your job, so you are going to be permanently removed from the DEA.."

"Am I being forced to retire or are you trying to kick me out?" Javi asked confused and slightly angry, he didn't like the insinuations they were making. What were they thinking? That he wasn't good enough for his job anymore or that he was getting too old?

"Excuse me, agent Peña…" another member of the board interrupted and glanced at his colleague and then back at him "you shouldn't see this as retirement, it is just a paid leave, a privilege really, and it has the duration of a year, after that you can choose if you'd like to go back to the field, or if you'd prefer to get a desk job, and if you take a liking on the easy life you can officially retire. Don't make a fuss out of it, agent… It is already much better than what would happen if Escobar hadn't been caught. You could be heading to jail instead of getting permanent paid vacation… it's just a small thank you as we all know that off the record, your association with that group was what really enabled our men to catch Escobar"

Before Javier could say anything about it, the men got up and exited the room, leaving him there dumbfounded and too shocked to say the least.

•••

"So technically you are on paid vacation for a whole year?" You asked as you held the phone against your ear and took off your shoes, getting comfortable in bed and watching your reflection in the mirror as you lay comfortably against the mattress. You had been staying in Javi's apartment ever since he had to leave; it just felt like the most logical decision as your own place never really felt like home and by staying at Javi's you felt somewhat closer to him.

"Yeah, that's what it seems like, I still don't know if they'll take my badge and gun, but I guess I won't be using them very much… but enough talking about that, it's good enough I'm not going to jail" he smiled sadly as he tried picturing you on the other side of the line, his body aching for yours at the same time you felt emotional, Javi had already told you everything that happened with details at least twice and you still asked questions just to double check it, even if it was an annoying habit you couldn't help but do it again and again just to make sure it was real and not just a sweet dream, your spent weeks fearing having your fiance taken to jail and now you were so relieved to know he would get paid to stay home. Of course Javier's pride was probably hurt and he felt bad about being removed from the job he dedicated himself to for the past years of his life, but after everything that went on with the hunt of Escobar and Judy Moncada's interview you were more than thankful he was actually being paid not to work. Not only that, but you knew it would do Javi good to be able to step away from the stress, the rush, the violence and the constant danger. You weren't an agent and you didn't work in the field and you felt you were often emotionally exhausted, so you couldn't even imagine how tired Javi must've felt.

"And I'm guessing you can't come back to Colombia… So are you going home?"

"Yeah, the board strongly advised me to avoid Colombia for now, and well, I'm going to Laredo, gonna see pa, check the things on the ranch… and I was hoping you could come? Maybe meet me there?" He suggested and your heart clenched, as you could picture perfectly the puppy look in his eyes as he asked you. You wanted to say yes, you wanted to scream yes to him, you wanted to tell him you would pack your things and fly in the first flight to Texas you could find and then later Steve and Connie could ship the rest of your things.

You wanted to tell him to wait for you at night because you would wear his favorite lingerie and that you could even get married if he wanted to, but instead, you sighed sadly as you felt your eyes watering and you tried your best so your voice wouldn't break and it wouldn't make Javi feel worse than he did before.

"I-I can't. I really want to, I can't wait Javi, sometimes I even dream of being in Laredo with you, even if I haven't been there, but I dream of us, of the family we'll build… but Messina told me it will take us from three to six months to finish the Escobar case paperwork" you said sadly knowing your heart would shatter if you heard the disappointment in his voice.

"It's alright" he said and there it was, the disappointment in his voice. He wasn't sad or angry with you, of course, but it felt like everything and everyone was against the two of you. For once, there was nothing Javier wanted more than to settle down with you and yet, it seemed everyone betted against it. "We will figure something else… I just miss you, cariño and I wish I could be there with you… or even better, I wish you could be here with me" he licked his lips and told you about how he had booked a flight for the next day so he could go back to his hometown and you smiled, trying to entertain yourself and not think of how unfair it was that you and Javi were kept apart like that. You sighed sadly but then you had an idea that could cheer the two of you up, you bit your lips, giggling softly.

"Javi?" You purred onto the phone knowing it certainly would draw his attention "what are you wearing?" You chuckled

"What?" He asked confused at first but getting what you meant almost instantly "what are you trying to do, princesa? ¿Quieres portarte como una puta?"

"Si Javi, siempre para tí" you replied chuckling "well, if you are gonna take too long, then I'll start… I'm wearing your shit, that blue one, you know? I got off shower a while ago and I just put the shirt on… with nothing underneath it"

"Fuck cariño, you are such a tease… you are trying to get into my pants, princesa?" He loved how you chuckled, he could picture your beautiful face, your body and the expectation of his touch.

"You haven't answered me yet, Peña" he could even picture your small frown as you called him by his last name. Javi laughed softly

"Well, I am wearing my jeans and that's all… why? What do you want now, Y/N?"

"Um… I like that Javi… you're holding the phone with your left hand, aren't you? Well, then where is your right hand placed?" Javier stroked his eyebrow with the tip of his thumb as he heard your voice

"It's on my forehead, why?"

"Because I want you to run your hand down your chest, Javi… down your stomach too, and get to your zipper, just as if it was my hand instead of yours, get it?"

Javi felt a spike of lust at your words. You often didn't give him orders, it was usually Javi who took the lead, but for some reason that side of you pleased him, and he gladly obeyed, getting to his zipper and gently tugging the button of his jeans.

"Done cariño… it doesn't compare to your hand, the real deal is way better, but I'm willing to know what else you want"

"Go ahead Javi, mi amor, open your fly… free your cock, I miss it so much" you said "I miss it how big and thick you are Javi, how you would stretch me real good, I miss you cumming inside of me, your hot cum deep inside my womb, how I would convulse and milk you dry, I miss you, te extraño tanto, amor" you whispered "are you hard, Javi?" you earned a grunt as a response "of course you are, you're always hard for me, aren't you Javi? I fucking love it"

"Always hard for you, baby, you're the only one who owns this cock" Javi's submission warmed your core and it made your pussy clench at the thought of him.

"Good Javi, me encanta saber eso" you purred, as he loved when you spoke Spanish to him "now, I want you to rub your thumb over your tip, okay? I bet it's already wet with your pre cum, isn't it?"

"Sí, mi amor" he purred back at you and did as you told him, groaning in pleasure as his tip was so sensitive.

"Good Javi… now I want you to wrap your hand around your cock and rub yourself up and down okay? Can you touch yourself for me, Javi?" He whispered a small yes as he wrapped his hand around himself and fucked his fist for you. He thought of you, your lips, your cunt, your ass, all of it for him, all the times you brought him pleasure and couldn't hold back any longer, he came, making a mess on his hand, his stomach and a little bit on his sheet.

You were so glad to have made him feel good and you two ended the call by exchanging love words. Despite the distance, nothing had changed and you two were going strong, because your love was strong.

•••

Another week had passed and things hadn't changed much for you. For Javi, on the other hand, things had changed a lot. He'd returned to Laredo and made sure to tell you every single part of his adventure, because it was an adventure to him. After being away from home for so many years, he came back as some kind of bizarre local superstar. Everyone he knew - and people he didn't know - stopped him to congratulate him on the services for the country, at the same time old girlfriends stared, glanced, frowned, whispered about him and some even threw their charms.

But your absolutely favorite situation that embarrassed Javier Peña to death: whenever an older woman came over to him and tried setting him up with a daughter, a niece or any other girl he had absolutely no intention of meeting. You always burst out laughing when Javi told you about these occasions, enjoying your amusement at how embarrassing those situations were for him. You would give anything to be there with him, to see how warm people from Laredo were when they saw your boyfriend and it made you proud to see he got the acknowledgement he deserved after working so hard.

You were happy Javi was enjoying his time, apparently his relationship with his dad had improved some, he got to take care of his horses and you couldn't hold back your hormones at the mere thought of Javier as a cowboy. You could bet he looked every bit sexy like that and you often daydreamed about it.

Because daydreaming about Javier was the only thing that made you happy, your job was a real torture, if you weren't happy before while you still had Javi by your side, now there wasn't even what to say about it. And when you got home it was worse, because you were welcomed by loneliness. And then in the morning, you would wake up and start it all over again.

Even when you got dressed, you didn't find joy in anything as everything reminded you of Javi. The clothes you picked, the nail polish you wore, your engagement ring. It was a sweet reminder of your Javi, but also a bitter reminder he was home.

You went to the office feeling bad like you usually did, you just had no will to do anything else, and you often wondered what the fuck you were still doing there.

You were sat at your desk, stress already cooking up your brain as you could feel your headache forming, when someone stood next to you, but you were too distracted to notice.

"Y/N?" You raised your head, shocked to hear that voice addressing you after so long

"Manu?" You said looking at the man, who's smiled at you just like he did when you first met "c-can I help you with anything? I haven't finished the reports yet, but I can assist you"

Manu shook his head and pulled a chair, sitting close to you and taking your hand, watching your engagement ring "I'm not here to talk about that, I'm here to talk about you and Javier… listen, I know shit went down between us and there was a time not too long ago I wanted to kill him and probably you too for hurting me" he sighed "but the anger I felt faded… and well, rumor has it Javier Peña proposed to you and judging by the size of this gem, I can tell Colleen was spreading the true story" Manu laughed at the sight of you gritting your teeth to hear about Colleen.

"But Javier isn't here anymore and I can see that you're sadder and sadder, and I don't like seeing you like that, Y/N… I know I shouldn't even care about you anymore, but I still do, and I know your heart belongs to someone else, but I also hate to see your light fading, you aren't happy here, and I also know you've been wanting to quit for a while…" for once this part of the gossip came from Steve, not Colleen, and you really didn't get why Murphy could be such a gossip girl sometimes "so, I just want you to know that I think you should do it, you should quit, hop on a plane and go after your happiness, because that's what I would do… of course I would like your happiness to be here with me, but I know it's Javier… it has always been him and there's no way I can compete with that" Manu offered you a sad smile and knew it was probably the last time he was seeing you, as he was sure you wouldn't be away from Javier for too long.

You felt so touched by Manu's attitude, you didn't expect that from him at all, among all the people, he was the one who had all the reasons in the world to hate you and be glad to see you that upset, and yet, he offered you nothing but kindness to the point it made you feel ashamed and guilty for being such a shitty girlfriend to him, he definitely deserved it better, but as he had said himself, you couldn't be the one to give it to him. Once again you apologized to him for all the heartache you caused, knowing it would probably not gonna be enough, but it made your heart soothed if he knew you at least meant those words.

You leaned in and hugged him, wishing him well because you also had the feeling that would be the last time you'd see him.

The rest of the day wasn't much more than a blur to you: you ran late to your meeting at the embassy because of the chaotic traffic and Messina wasn't pleased about it. She'd been acting like a major bitch, which was odd as most represent of the government were nothing but smiles ever since Escobar was dead, and yet, she acted towards everybody like she could scold them like a fifth grade teacher over absolutely anything. It angered you and it was also one of the no Peña related reasons why you were so unmotivated about your job, and the fact that Manu's words wouldn't leave your mind and you couldn't quite focus on anything other than staring down at your engagement ring and fantasize about leaving everything behind didn't make things anything easy.

"I'm sorry Y/N… did I say something funny?" Messina raised her eyebrow as she angrily addressed to you, snapping you out of your fantasies and making everyone in the room stare

"What?" You replied to her, having no clue what she was actually talking about.

"I wanted to know if you thought I had said something funny while we were revisiting the case because while everybody focused on the reports you were just smiling at yourself, it seems you don't care about your job"

You stared at her for a while as you didn't say anything, letting her words sink and looking around the room, watching as the other people looked at you, everybody looking stressed and miserable while sweating uncomfortably because of the heat and you realized you didn't actually have to put up with that because you didn't actually care about that job and most importantly because you were just a flight away from being happy.

"You're right, I don't care about this job at all, I don't care what page of the report you guys are, I don't care if there's a typo or if you didn't like the final result, in fact, I would like to quit and never come back here" he said throwing your papers onto her desk and walking out the room, feeling the sweet taste of freedom.

The rest of the day went a lot smooth than you thought. You just went back home, packed all your essentials in one big bag and then knocked on Steve's and Connie's door, to let them know you were flying to Texas. They were shocked at first and even thought you were joking, but when they realized you were dead serious, they made sure to assure you they'd take care of your stuff and send them over to you whenever you or Javi needed. Connie hugged you tight and made you promise you would visit, and you just giggled and told her they were already invited to the wedding.

The couple drove you to the airport and after giving you their goodbyes, you boarded on the plane, so happy to know in just a few hours you'd see Javi.

You flew overnight and got to Laredo in the morning, so excited to see Javi. It had been a surprise and if you had told Steve he shouldn't tell Javi where you were going, you didn't want to spoil things.

When you first got to Laredo, you realized you didn't know where Javi's ranch was but you were so exhausted you couldn't even think straight. You realized you needed to sleep through your jetlag and calm down from all the emotional rollercoaster you went through. Not to mention the physical part that made your entire body sore.

You found a small motel just a couple of blocks from the airport and decided to book a room for the day, - because you didn't plan to sleep there through the night - but much to your horror, the moment you placed your head against the pillow you simply passed out and only woke up in the evening.

You were so disoriented you had forgotten for a split second where you were, but you jumped off the bed and went to the bathroom, showering and getting rid of all the sweat and tiredness and changing into one of Javi's favorite summer dresses.

Then, you went to the reception and asked where the Peña ranch was, to which the young woman smiled and explained you the location.

"Forgive me, but I don't think Don Chucho and Javier are there now, tonight's Danny's wedding and pretty much the whole Laredo is gonna be there… I'm going there now myself as my shift has just ended" you nodded at her and remembered that Javi had indeed mentioned something about a wedding that week "but if you'd like, you could come with me? I'll give you a ride"

•••

Javi had just talked to Lorraine and apologized to her again. It had been just a habit he got into over the past decade as guilt still consumed him every time he saw her. It didn't matter how many times she assured him she had forgiven her, he still felt guilty.

He felt guilty because he knew you went through a very similar situation and he could kill the guy who made you go throught that, because he couldn't even imagine someone hurting you like that.

When Lorraine talked about her family, Javi couldn't help but imagine his own, the one he would have with you in the future. He sighed as he got distracted from thinking of a beautiful little girl that looked like you as you had another bread in the oven and wore a golden ring around your finger and went back to his seat. Javi was good to go, but his dad was still eating and he didn't want to rush him.

He distractedly scanned the room and didn't notice when you came from behind, approaching him quietly and placing your delicate hands on his shoulders

"Would you like to dance, Javi?" You asked him, as he turned around feeling slightly mortified watching you stand there, just like he dreamed of for the last couple of weeks.

_____

A/N: I hope you liked it besties, let me know what you think! ❤️

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