#im not fucking tagging everyone

[peachybutch]

How Good the RvB Main Cast is at Cooking, Ranked from Best to Worst

1. Donut

Donut gives off the vibe of one of those gay men with a baking channel on YouTube. This man's out here rolling up to the red team monthly dinner club with frenched rack of lamb with a pistachio mint crust and wine accompaniment, then earl grey souffle with creme anglaise for dessert. He spends hours experimenting with new and interesting ingredients. Remy Ratatouille, send-you-back-to-rural-France ass man. Donut's food fucks hard and everyone knows it.

2. Grif

You really think my man Grif loves food as much as he does and doesn't know how to make it? C'mon. He doesn't, like, relish the act of cooking as much as he does having a good plate of food at the end of it. And he's not typically much for sharing. But my guy makes a damn good short rib and bechamel lasagna. Give him the day to let something slow cook, and god damn.

3. Wash

Wash has been living off of MREs for probably his entire adult life, but I feel like he's got a few dishes he can whip out for a date night, or if he's feeling fancy. He knows how to read a recipe, and he has a pretty good idea of what flavors go together to make something good. He probably has a really nice papardelle with vinho verde sauce that he has sitting around in the back of his head for special occasions.

4. Tucker

Okay, Tucker isn't a bad cook by any means, ok? He's great with breakfast food specifically. It's just that he isn't especially fancy about it. He was probably, like, a line cook at Denny's in high school, so all his food tastes like food you would get at Denny's. Which isn't a bad thing! You would just never call Denny's "fine dining". He has his niche, and he does it well, and he never feels even a little bit inclined to do anything different or better.

5. Church (Alpha)

Church isn't much of a foodie right off the bat, but someone's got to pack Caboose's lunch, and he ends up learning how to cook fairly well after that. After a certain point, he figures out how to make things from scratch--mostly things like chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, pancakes.

6. Simmons

I feel like Simmons mostly lives off of shit like green smoothies and homemade granola. Like, hardcore, low carb, vegan, all organic, high protein diet. And, like, it doesn't taste BAD. But it definitely isn't the kind of thing you bring to the red team dinner club. He does make a really nice sunbutter brownie that he has to hide from Grif.

7. Caboose

Caboose has been banned from using any objects in the kitchen that involve a heat source--which isn't HIS fault! How was he supposed to know that you're supposed to take the spoon OUT of the mac and cheese before putting it in the microwave? That's just a recipe for a cold spoon! Anyways, he manages just fine without the microwave, thank you very much. He can make ants on a log like it's nobody's business. Cleaning up afterwards is another matter entirely.

8. Carolina

Carolina is one of the most competent individuals you will ever meet. She could kill you in under a minute, in 30 different ways, and that's just with her bare hands. The fourth time Sarge tries to recruit her into red team is by inviting her to the monthly dinner club. She shows up empty handed, and when Donut very politely asks what she brought, she replies that it's very interesting that they expected the only woman on the team to go all out with cooking. They move on. Carolina spent 5 hours in the kitchen this afternoon trying to figure out how to use the oven. But they don't need to know that.

9. Tex

Now, listen. Tex can't be called a bad cook, precisely, because that would require she cook for herself or others. Which is something she does not do. That's what Church is for, isn't it?

10. Sarge

Sarge refuses to step foot in a kitchen after the fifth shouting match about how flamethrowers are not a universally recognized kitchen appliance.

11. Church (Epsilon)

One time, while blue team is shooting the wind, Caboose asks Epsilon what his favorite breakfast food is. Instead of calling Caboose a dumbass, as per usual, he instead goes into extensive detail about how he eats computer keys like cereal. Caboose tries it. It isn't very good.

#pb.txt #rvb #red vs blue #donut rvb #church rvb #wash rvb #im not fucking tagging everyone #i am so fucking hungry thinking about short rib and bechamel lasagna #long post

[elismagicatnado]

#marvel vs capcom 2 #marvel vs capcom #mvsc #mvsc2 #capcom #marvel #i was a woman possessed when i made this im sorry #im not fucking tagging everyone

[inkskinned]

i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".

it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.

do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.

but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.

do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).

you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.

walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.

no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.

do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."

you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.

there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.

i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.

he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."

#spilled ink #warm up #“why did u tag it warm up” bc i wrote it off the cuff while drinkin coffee lol #btw the 30 dollar buy in for the dog walking is bc they pay the organizer a small pittance so she can #run fb ads and stuff and like she does put in a lot of work i don't mind paying her #but that's exactly what im fucking talking about like. #ppl can't afford to volunteer their time anymore and we all understand it!!! everything costs money for everyone! #like we didn't have to use to say ''do you mind paying me back for the stuff we ate'' #we used to be able to afford to feed our friends once in a while!!!

[charles-draws]

i spent a lot of time on this actually

#hs #im not fucking tagging everyone #a couple of these were written Like That because ive been looking at a lot of shitty old homestuck posts on pinterest lately. #also sorry about gamzees hair. i couldn't remember how to draw it so defaulted to nagito komaeda

[brother-emperors]

something. about. the horror of being sent on an impossible (death) quest and obligations and hospitality politics. the trauma of not having a home, and then the trauma of being in a house that becomes actively hostile to you, one that would swallow you whole and spit out your bones if you step out of line. all of this is conditional, your existence continues to be something men want gone.

it's about going back as far as I can with the perseus narrative because there's always a version of a myth that exists behind the one that survives. the missing pieces are clearly defined, but the oldest recorded version of it isn't there! and there's probably something older before that!! but it's doomed to forever be an unfilled space, clearly defined by an outline of something that was there and continues to be there in it's absence.

and love. it's also about love. even when you had nothing, you had love.

on the opposite side of the spectrum, this is Not About Ovid Or Roman-Renaissance Reception, Depictions And Discourses On The Perseus Narrative.

edit: to add to the above, while it's not about Ovid, because I'm specifically trying to peel things back to the oldest version of this story, Ovid is fine. alterations on the Perseus myth that give more attention Medusa predate Ovid by several centuries. this comic is also not about those, either! there are many versions of this story from the ancient world. there is not one singular True or Better version, they're all saying something.

Perseus, Daniel Ogden

Anthology of Classical Myth: Primary Sources in Translation, edited & translated by Stephen M Trzaskoma, R. Scott Smith, Stephen Brunet

#perseus #danae #komiks tag #long post #every other week i start to say something about how greek heroes are a good case study in diaspora and exile trauma #but man perseus makes me so sad. so does danae. she loves her son :( #perseus turning a whole island to stone is a huge mood. i would also do that if i were him #anyway (salutes) take care everyone i gotta watch yunho's new video it looks like a fucking movie im so excited #(i singled out ovid bc i remember the fucking shit perseus discourse that ran through this site. i remember #im preemptively loading a gun and pointing at it before it can touch this post #it hasn't died out either i see it on twitter all the time in the most ANNOYING ways possible i am TIRED #esp bc they're actually doing medusa a narrative disservice like congrats! you made it worse! stop telling me it's better!!!!) #it’s all greek to me

[ao3-crack]

(x)

#archive of our own #ao3 quotes #ao3 stuff #archive of our own quotes #fanfic #fanfic quotes #funny #ao3 #ao3 tags #i wrote it drunk after having real life gay sex #so everyone cheer for me #i think this is the funniest shit ive ever read bro #I’m still laughing as I post this #bro im lightheaded #from laughing so fucking much

[howlidae]

y'all know what time it is!!!! twitter doodle crosspost to tumblr. for context of the last image: someone over on twitter posted a headcanon that bobby fulbright and sebastian debeste were brothers, and i couldn't help but draw it

#ace attorney #my art #fuck this is a lot of characters #simon blackquill #uendo toneido #klavier gavin #ema skye #aura blackquill #nahyuta sahdmadhi #phoenix wright #miles edgeworth #mia fey #maya fey #franziska von karma #sebastian debeste #bobby fulbright #sorry for the people who wanted to see more of anyone #im just tagging everyone as common courtesy

[chipchopclipclop]

it twas only a matter of time before i broke on my own fantasy au design nonsense. my dnd bones.

#chipchopdraws #yakuza #like a dragon #ladiw #like a dragon infinite wealth #my god i dont want to tag everyones names #ichiban kasuga #nanba yu #koichi adachi #saeko mukoda #zhao tianyou #joon gi han #seonhee #eric tomizawa #chitose fujinomiya #kazama kiryu #all the fucking warriors #bottom group ended up looking so goth together (aside from tomi) so now im laughing #yakuza 8 spoilers #slighttlyyy

[lobster-lover]

sorry for no art posts lately im insane. anyways heres more fucking homestuck (assorted facebook memepage style)

#homestuck #im tagging everyone this time. are you ready #ok here we go #davepetasprite #jade harley #tavros nitram #tinkerbull #ult dirk #dirk strider #rose lalonde #viceroy bubbles von salamancer #june egbert #john egbert #fucking whatever #dave strider #dad egbert #karkat vantas #hes like 5 pixels in the background does that count #OK IM DONE . LEAVE

[wyrmswears]

team with no jay meets team with just jay (the dr ninja travel to the s6 timeline)

#ninjago #ninjago dragons rising #ninjago skybound #ninjago jay #ninjago nya #set uhm after the lighthouse. jays got the ninja replacements and theyre planning!! #its fun because i realised not only havent the ninja seen jay in dr but they havent seen any of the ninja replacements at all #also i like putting jay at around 16 in skybound and skylor a year or two older him. arin and sora are maybe a year younger than him in thi #wyldfyre i put at around 13 yrs old (shes the baby of the group) #I GET BORED AND MAKE AUS OK. IM SORRY!! #jay walker #ns6 #ninjago dragons rising spoilers #im not tagging everyone fuck you #nya smith #wyrm draws #ninjago au #lego ninjago

[gayforbagels]

Pouring one out for Afghanistan and Anguilla and Antigua and Aoteoroa and Barbuda and Australia and the Bahamas and Bahrain and Bangladesh and Barbados and Belize and Bermuda and Botswana and Brazil and Brunei and Canada and the Cayman Islands and Cornwall and Cyprus and Dominica and Egypt and the Islas Malvinas and Fiji and Gambia and Georgia (the country) and Ghana and Gibraltar and Grenada and Guyana and Hong Kong and India and Iraq and Ireland and Jamaica and Jordan and Kenya and Kiribati and Kuwait and Lesotho and Malawi and Malaysia and Maldives and Malta and Mauritius and Montserrat and Myanmar and Nauru and Nigeria and Pakistan and Palestine and the Pitcairn Islands and Qatar and St Lucia and Saint Kitts and Nevis and Saint Helena and Ascension and Tristan da Cunha and St Vincent and Grenadina and Scotland and Seychelles and Sierra Leone and Singapore and the Solomon islands and Somaliland and South Africa and Sri Lanka and Sudan and Swaziland and Tanzania and Tonga and Trinidad and Tobago and Turks and Caicos and Tuvalu and Uganda and United Arab Emirates and United States and Vanuatu and Wales and Yemen and Zambia and Zimbabwe tonight

#text #op #dancing crabs #and many more #sorry if I missed you trust me when I say I am still popping the FATTEST bottle for u TONIGHT #edit: guys I copy pasted a shit ton of countries from fucking Wikipedia for a shitpost it’s not that deep #edit: the amount of y’all that are tagging this as ‘except us and Canada’ are missing the fucking point #it isn’t cute lol #EDIT: WHATS UP GUYS IT’S ME YA BOY COMING LIVE FROM. GLASS ONE OF WINE #I CHANGED MY MIND FUCK IT IM ADDING EVERYONE I MISSED INTO THE OP #AND ANOTHER THING #SOME OF YALL HAVE TO REMEMBER THERE ARE INDIGENOUS PEOPLE IN CANADA AND THE USA TOO #SAYING THE USA AND CANADA DOESNT DESERVE TO POP BOTTLES IS DISMISSIVE OF EVERY INDIGENOUS LIFE DAMAGED BY THE BRITISH EMPIRE #AUSTRALIA TOO #THE MONARCHY HAD A VERY PROMINENT ROLE ALONGSIDE THE CATHOLIC CHURCH IN RESIDENTIAL SCHOOLS AND COLONIAL VIOLENCE #IN SETTLER HISTORY #ALSO TO ANY OF MY BRITISH HOMOES I AM SO SORRY YALL HAVE TO GO THROUGH THAT PROPAGANDA MACHINE RN #GFGFGFFGGG I’m not changing that

[handsomegentlebutch]

I saw some dumb shit on reddit and after being down voted to all hell made some memes to express myself

#butch speaks #lesbian #lesbianism #lgbtq #memes #lgbt memes #okay to rb #spread the word yall #butch lesbians #butch #trans lesbian #protect your sisters not just your CISters #dykes against transphobia #dykes of tumblr #why am i using all these tags? cuz im proud of these memes and everyone should see them #and be nice to the more vulnerable members of our community #fuck me i just noticed a typo in one #oh well #TWO TYPOS #Fuck. i was annoyed when i made these but u get it

[pluviatrix]

astarion origin playthrough going...well? / big man WHY are we announcing that we got ghaik'd in front of god and everybody. it was for the achievement i swear.

#astarion #bg3 #mj art #do i get to tag everyone cuz theyre here? #im gonna do that. #gale #wyll ravengard #karlach #halsin #minthara #lae'zel #shadowheart #BAM BOW TAG APOCALYPSE #in my astarion playthru EVERYONE was trying to get in his pants it was fucking hilarious. MIZORA. ive played two playthroughs before this #and mizora NEVER EVER came onto me....astarion has game. it may be pathetic soaking wet rabid animal game but its there. i guess.

[axolotlclown]

Ok, none of you know what's going on. None of you understand why so many women and young streamers are stepping forward right now. None of you understand why this has to be public.

Multiple large streamers have used their fame, influence, and money to manipulate and abuse those they see as below them. So long as they continue to have fame, influence, and money, this cycle will not end.

This is bigger than just individual cases of sexual assault or other abuse. This is a break down of a much larger problem within the entertainment industry.

These women are telling stories about very powerful men in this space. They are sharing stories of abuse and manipulation. This is very scary for them—it could ruin their careers or lives.

Stop saying "they should have handled this privately." This isn't a private matter. So long as these men have power, they will hurt more women. They aren't sorry. They won't play fair.

By trying to stay silent and bury these accusations, you are ensuring these women never know peace. You are ensuring that more women get hurt.

One day your boss will assault you, and all the men in your life will blame you for waiting as long as you did to speak about it. They will find any reason to blame you. They don't want to get rid of your boss. They hope that one day, they can assault a woman just like you.

This is fucking serious. This is real life. This isn't just some fucking fandom drama that we can bury and move on from. These are real life issues that require real meaningful discussion.

Stop trying to discredit these women just because your streamer is in trouble. You are part of the fucking problem.

#and if youre still confused as to what the problem is #i have a million posts about it already #im so sick of hearing this dumbass take #if you dont have anything productive to add to the conversation #then shut the fuck up #my god #this shit is real #yall are going to get jobs and go to bars and realize how fucking real this shit is #thoughts of dante #fuck it #ill tag everyone #shubble #wilbur soot #caitibugzz #caiti #georgenotfound #gnf #dream #dreamwastaken #andi #punz #wisp #kit wisp #illumina #am i missing anyone? #i think thats it #oh #sapnap #hell be relevant here in a minute #anyway

[ameba-from-space]

I was so enraged after I read a tweet about how men batman villains are scared of him and female villains want to fuck him that I blacked out and when I woke up I had this

So what do yall think, who should change and who should I add?

#im not tagging everyone fuck that #batman #bruce wayne #dc #dc comics #joker #catwoman #harley quinn #poison ivy #the riddler #“wanting to fuck batman is kinda of a batman villain requirement”

[camthecatchameleon]

a few days ago my brain demanded i draw polywitchlight RIGHT NOW and who am i to refuse

original and closeups under the cut

original/template is from “Go For It Nakamura!” by Syundei which i have not read actually

+ closeups; feel free to use as icons with credit smile

#legends of avantris #once upon a witchlight #torbek #gideon coal #morning frost #kremy lecroux #gricko grimgrin #meme redraw #cw possible eyestrain #polylight #polywitchlight #do i even bother tagging twig hootsie and duke/gorebek if theyre just tiny little guys #obligatory click/open in new tab for better quality. #cmon guys i spent so much time on this #i actually LOOKED AT A REFERENCE???? GASP wow that never happens !!! #anyways i love gricko and his fucking teefers #im realizing that i dont draw torbek as fucked up and sad looking as everyone else does which does make him look inaccurate but shut up #in my heart hes adorable okay