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easays · 3 months

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To Ragh; or, On Fatness

Hi! Below is an actual play mini-essay. These are written as part of a personal writing practice of thinking critically about actual play. I hope you find this reading engaging and know that all I write reflects my own interpretations rather than as an official representation/canonization of these shows. Keep reading for my interpretation of Ragh Barkrock's fatness as part of queer representation in Dimension20.

Ragh Barkrock may be one of the most beloved NPCs in Dimension20. It would be easy for Ragh, a bloodrush player good enough to potentially play professionally, to be presented as hypermasculine. In fact, the freshmen year art for Ragh, when he was antagonist rather than beloved ally, showed him in a muscular, inverted Dorito shaped body typical of a jock.

He's, obviously, built, and his cut jaw and cheekbones only bolster that image. As Ragh comes to terms with being gay at the end of Fantasy High, his countenance changes. When we see him again, the new art reflects a chubbier, happier Ragh.

The show aligning weight gain with acceptance and happiness already works against prevailing stereotypes that use weight loss as a quick metaphor for improving yourself and being the "real you." Moreover, connecting Ragh's acceptance of his sexuality with what seems like a larger comfort in his own body is a strong indictment of hypermasculine gay culture. As Gabriel Arana writes, gay men "must reconcile their sense of masculinity with their failure to conform to its heterosexuality." Not doing so has negative mental health outcomes, as Arana points out, and contributes to a culture that devalues fat queer people (see the popular "no fats, no femmes, no Asians" that often is touted in masculine gay subculture).

All of this, I think, is why Ragh's art for Junior Year was particularly impactful for me as a fat queer person. If being a gay man (or half-Orc, in Ragh's case) means having to situate your life in relationship to failing compulsory masculinity, then it seems there is an inherent queer aspect to embracing, celebrating, and showcasing a beloved NPC in an explicitly fat and happy body.

FHJY Ragh art by @caitmayart

Ragh is still strong and he is still fat. His body radiates a commitment to the power of fat bodies to exist in spaces they are often violently unwelcome in, such as gyms. Existing in gyms and sports spaces as fat people means dealing the "impossible standard that rejects nearly all of us" and upholds a diet culture rooted in impossible, Eurocentric and colonial body standards. In TTRPGS or actual plays, there is a unique opportunity to think about how bodies might exist in worlds different from ours, to imagine bodyminds as otherwise. However, as queer critics like Paul Preciado have noted, sci-fi and fantasy representations of cyborgs and other transformative bodies often lean into "fixing" disabled people or moving gender nonconforming bodies more easily towards technologies upholding a normative standard rather than questioning the standard all together.

Spyre is a world that deals with similar issues to ours, even without direct one-to-one correlations, so it, too, is a place where the narrative and artistic choices should be examined in how it helps us interpolate the world the audience resides in. From the Applebees cultish adherence to a deity-based nationalism to the various representations of parental neglect and abuse and every side story in-between, Dimension20's flagship show does not shy away from difficult realities even when recasting them through fantasy. Ragh, as a half-orc gay son of a disabled single mother, then, I see the arc his fat body goes through as meaningful and intertwined with his self-acceptance and queerness. He moves away from the toxic masculinity engineered into his blood rush team to instead pursue coalition comraderie with his friends to the point that he and his mother end up joining a communal living situation with those friends and their parents. Ragh's body expands as his family does, as his ties to community do, and to me, the gift of his fatness is the invitation to expansion that it holds out to us as viewers.

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ape-apocalypse · 3 months

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This line from Noa in the new trailer got my brain thinking. What could the elders of his tribe have hidden from the young ape? Here are some of theories rattling around my brain:

The history of the apes and humans. With it being 300 years after the fall of human civilization, it makes sense that the truth of that long ago human society that caged and tortured apes would get lost or changed, or a deliberate act of the elders to protect the next generation from that traumatic past. Noa finding a children's picture book showing an ape in a cage and looking very angry could hint at this.

The legacy of Caesar/Noa as Caesar's descendant. From the first image of Noa, many fans have latched onto the theory that Noa is a descendant of Caesar and his surviving son Cornelius (myself included!). Could the elders have hidden Noa's heritage and the truth of Caesar's story to protect him from the burden of his great family legacy?

Connections to Proximus Caesar's group. Noa's tribe is described as a small and isolated group. Is it possible that, at one point, they'd been part of Proximus Caesar's larger community and struck out on their own? Perhaps they left when Proximus Caesar declared himself ruler and twisted the original ape teachings from Caesar.

Any theories of your own? Given that we've seen an image of Noa talking with one of his elders, Koro, I feel like whatever is being held back from him is a big deal and will lead to a confrontation.

#kingdom of the planet of the apes #planet of the apes #pota #noa #proximus caesar #mae #wes ball #owen teague #freya allan #caesar #mine #chimpanzee #chimp #gorilla #orangutan #kevin durand #reboot pota #koro

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shannankle · 4 months

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My Top Shows 2023

Doing this at the last minute but here goes--the top 10 shows I watched in 2023!

*Note: I rate my shows on a letter scale cause I don't like narrowing it down to a specific number. (S-standout As-Strong Bs-Fine Cs-There's some problems Ds-ooof)

1. Oh No! Here Comes Trouble

This one instantly became an all time favorite. It covers themes about grief and loss in a deeply empathetic and humanizing way along side the supernatural elements. I don't know if it's because I've experienced loss myself or because it's a universal experience, but I love shows like this that help you understand what it means to grieve and heal in a familiar yet new light. It reminded me a lot of Natsume Yuujinchou (another favorite) in that respect.

Aside from the larger themes, you have a distinct directing style, quirky sense of humor, well-rounded cast of characters, and excellent acting (the lead actor was also in Your Name Engraved Herein and he's just as standout here). In addition to all that, the show gives us a main trio of characters whose strengths are deliberately not their wits. This is used for humor but also to make more meaningful points about connection, empathy, and different ways of thinking (yes, I headcanon the main trio as neurodivergent).

Rating: S+

2. The Eighth Sense

This show! Another piece that is deeply rooted in exploring trauma and loss. This time within the framework of a romance. I'm usually pretty hesitant with stories that bring disability into romance, especially mental illness. There's a tendency to lean into the idea that love cures all and other not so great tropes. The Eighth Sense does a great job balancing that line, giving us romantic beats without wading into them uncritically. In the end, healing and love are things we choose not something guaranteed, but there's still an immense hope in that. I'm an giant sucker for shows that tackle both queer and crip experiences with nuance and grace, and the Eighth Sense hit that mark for me (so much so it even had me writing a little meta). On top of that it has beautiful cinematography and visual choices.

Rating: S

3. Moonlight Chicken

A beautiful show all around! P'Aof constantly knocks it out of the park with every show he directs, but I felt particularly strong about Moonlight Chicken. I adore the way it centers on themes of home and community. It even inspired some meta and a bit of personal reflection for me on what it means to choose home as someone who is queer and disabled. The show gives us the messiness that comes with navigating new and old relationships and somehow also the simplicity of it all. And of course, the show includes a Deaf character and handles his story with nuance and clear care.

Rating: S

4. Shadow

Singto, Fluke, and Fiat in a queer horror show--sign me up! It wasn't as scary as I expected, more psychological (which is good because I am so picky about what types of horror are too much for me vs what I enjoy). I loved the way the show played with time and reality and drew upon various religious practices to create a unique atmosphere. I also adored the attention to small details that make the piece ripe for analysis. I will probably be eyeing clocks and tech in many shows to come. It's also a show that is bringing up themes about queerness, mental illness, domestic violence, and historical trauma. I'm continually drawn to pieces that are queer and crip, so I suppose it's no surprise that this one drew me in too.

I know this show was divisive, about as many people thought it stuck the landing as didn't. I happen to land in the former category. I adore media that makes me stop and think, and given the amount of meta the show had/has me writing, I'd say it well and truly tickled my brain. The show didn't always go where I most wanted or expected but I think that challenged me even more to really think about what the show might be trying to do (my thoughts on that here, spoilers though).

Rating: S

5. Our Dining Table

Japan does a lot of things well, but I'm particularly fond of their slice-of-life. Our Dining Table fits right in there with food and found family at the center. It's warm and cute, but has a depth beyond it's soft exterior, delving into loss, loneliness, and what it means to be fully seen by those around us. All of this tied up in a queer bow. It was easily the show I was most excited to watch each week when it was airing.

Rating: S

6. Mysterious Lotus Casebook

Another one I fell in love with this year! While it has plenty of tropes, cutting through the core of all of this is the growing friendship between the main trio, especially between Li Lian Hua and Fang Duo Bing. Their relationship and personal growth as characters was really beautiful to watch, on top of it just being a fun show with a great balance of humor and drama. Plus Fang Duo Bing's mom 😍

Rating: S

7. One Room Angel

Another solid entry out of Japan. As much as I love Japan's bright slice-of-life offerings like Our Dining Table, they also excel at stories that don't shy away from heavy or complex emotional themes. And I'm noticing as I tackle this post that I really resonate with heavy themes. One Room Angel has it's lighter moments and own quirky humor. But it also tackles depression and suicide as it explores the journey of finding enough connection and meaning in life to keep moving forward.

Rating: S

8. I Feel You Linger in the Air

I Feel You Linger in the Air was such a beautiful show! I'm so happy we got a historical thai bl this year and that it was so so lovely. I really liked last year's To Sir With Love but it does have it's Lakorn/soap style that is a bit more of an obstacle for me. IFYLITA certainly has it's drama, but it feels more tightly drawn. Throw in a little time travel and beautiful love scenes and it was a delight to watch.

Rating: S

9. My Beautiful Man S2, Eternal

When I watched the first season of My Beautiful Man I liked it but wasn't exactly sold. I read a bit of meta from the community which changed my tune a bit. But it wasn't until watching season 2 and Eternal that something really clicked. I immediately went back and watched season 1 after finishing the film and oh boy did I fall in love. Not only do S2 and Eternal give us great character growth and forward motion to Hira and Kiyoi's relationship, and they feel like a natural expansion of the first season in the best way possible. What can I say, I love the whole series!

Rating: A+

10. Kiseki: Dear to Me

Kiseki: Dear to Me feels like an outlier to me. It's hard for me to put my finger on just what made it click for me, but I was so into it when it was airing. I recognize that plot wise this show is a bit of a mess, but at the same time it hit something just right in my brain. Perhaps it was the emotional intimacy the actors portrayed? They did a fantastic job drawing me in. Apart from that I couldn't take my eyes off of Ai Di's impeccable fashion choices, and the many many cameos were quite fun.

Rating: A+ YMMV

A few close contenders:

My School President (S) *split airing 22' and 23'

Tokyo in April Is... (A+)

Laws of Attraction (A)

Bed Friend (A)

The End of the World with You (A)

Me, My Husband, and My Husband's Boyfriend (A)

If it's with You (A)

Our Dating Sim (A)

Love Tractor (A)

The Warp Effect (A) *split airing 22' and 23'

The New Employee (A) *split airing 22' and 23'

La Pluie (A-)

Midnight Museum (A-)

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vstoly-blog · 1 year

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So This Is Love

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.•¨*•. ☆ .•*¨•..•¨*•. ☆ .•*¨•..•¨`•. ☆

Gender neutral reader ❀

Everyone can identify ❀

.•¨*•. ☆ .•*¨•..•¨*•. ☆ .•*¨•..•¨`•. ☆

Malleus Draconia

When someone questions what love is, they must be open to various different answers. Living beings have different opinions on how to perceive love.

Many might say that Malleus would ask Lilia about the subject, but I see that he would like to learn it on his own, to experience new sensations without having the spoiler of what comes after, gradually discovering what to do and getting used to his own body's reaction to that feeling.

Malleus read children's romantic books, making a point to remember how each of the protagonists recognized that feeling and how they described it on each page. During his walks, Malleus surely paid attention to the couple of birds joyfully singing on the branches of trees or to the small and larger animals living together, which made him question himself about the possibility of having someone to fill the void of his empty thoughts and solitary walks.

However, time passed, and Malleus is now an adult, perhaps even more so in human age. He set all of that aside for several reasons. People feel intimidated without much effort, besides the fact that he will eventually become a king, carrying great responsibilities and the trust of his future reign.

But during one of his walks through the now no longer abandoned dormitory, he met someone new. It wasn't supposed to be something new, but this time everything was different, different enough to capture his attention in this interesting being. At first, Malleus only wanted to see more of their innocence.

What used to be small conversations are now more complete encounters. That question he had when he was younger resurfaced, and Malleus has the opportunity to truly feel what love is.

When your fingers touch while you're sitting there looking at the stars.

In those moments when you ignore the fact that it's getting late just to spend more time with him.

When you're about to close the door but then you meet his eyes and sweetly smile at him one last time that night.

The way you always ask at the end of the date, "Will you be free tomorrow to go out again?".

How you trust him to vent all the problems you're going through and are willing to listen to his advice.

On dates you both talk for hours and you feel bold enough to ask about his culture, so that in the following days you try to do exactly as he described, earning a smile from Malleus who appreciates your actions.

Malleus feels his heart racing, the involuntary feeling of smiling whenever he sees you, wishing that tomorrow would come quickly to look for you one more time. Currently, he fully understands how all those princesses from the stories felt but Malleus has a thought to himself that those princes are nothing compared to you.

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

The gentle moonlight illuminated you and Malleus as you found yourselves in a moment of pure serenity. Another night together, where you chose a garden to spend time in. The fragrant flowers spread their sweet aroma in the air, while a cool breeze caressed your faces.

The two of you were united by an idea in which Malleus would teach you to waltz with his graceful rhythm.

With kindness and patience, Malleus led you through the smooth and harmonious steps of the waltz. Your gazes met in silent communication, as if the outside world faded away, leaving only the two of you in that moment. The intertwined hands conveyed a sense of security and connection, a bond that went beyond words.

There was no music, but Malleus volunteered to hum, which seemed to resonate perfectly in tune with your movements. The delicate steps, guided by Malleus's mastery, glided smoothly across the lawn, as if you were floating. Every curve and turn were executed with grace, in perfect harmony.

While waltzing, the two of you shared knowing smiles, exchanging small whispers and stifled laughter. With each movement, you grew closer, your hearts beating in unison. The sparkle in Malleus's eyes revealed the joy overflowing in his chest.

The garden at night became a refuge of enchantment and passion, witnessing the love blooming between Malleus and his beloved. Under the starry sky, you danced as if time was suspended, immersed in a world of your own where worries and obstacles ceased to exist.

Each spin and step taken on that special night was a declaration of love. The tranquil and romantic ambiance embraced the couple, creating a magical setting that made the moment even more memorable. The gentle touch of Malleus's hands conveyed affection and protection, while your passion confidently surrendered to the dance, carried away by the melody of love.

After a few waltz steps, both of you allowed yourselves a pause to catch your breath, while softly laughing at each other. The passion in your eyes denoted a mixture of gratitude and amusement, knowing that your clumsy movements were in the skillful hands of Malleus to guide.

"You're doing great," Malleus said with an encouraging smile. "The waltz may seem complicated at first, but with a little practice, I'm sure you'll master the steps."

You let out a shy laugh, your hair gently swaying with the movement. "I must confess, I feel a bit clumsy, but I'm loving every moment of it."

Malleus smiled, looking into your eyes. "Don't worry about the perfect elegance of the steps. What truly matters is being together, sharing this dance."

Feeling encouraged by Malleus's comforting words, you relaxed and allowed yourself to be guided once again by the waltz movements. Malleus let the lyrics of the music escape from his mouth as he gently and patiently led you, adjusting his movements to make you feel more at ease.

With each attempt, Malleus praised your progress, highlighting your strengths and encouraging you to continue. Together, you turned the learning moments into a fun and joyful adventure.

While waltzing, you felt free to ask some questions about the dance, such as the meaning of the steps, the history behind the waltz, and related curiosities. Malleus enthusiastically shared his knowledge, explaining each aspect in detail, taking the opportunity to get even closer.

As the night progressed, clumsiness mixed with charm, creating a unique atmosphere filled with complicity. The dance became just an excuse to be close, to share laughter and secrets, further strengthening the bond that united you.

In the moonlit garden, Malleus and his beloved knew that the waltz was only the beginning of a journey of mutual discovery. While dancing and having fun, he realized that it didn't matter if your passion was clumsy or inexperienced; what mattered was the love and connection you shared.

.•¨*•. ☆ .•*¨•..•¨*•. ☆ .•*¨•..•¨`•. ☆

Open request

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.•¨*•. ☆ .•*¨•..•¨*•. ☆ .•*¨•..•¨`•. ☆

Cat's Note:

Thanks to everyone who participated in the poll, 794 is a lot of people! Anyway, today there will be another poll for anyone interested.

#twisted wonderland #twst x male reader #twst headcanons #twst imagines #twst #twst scenarios #twst x reader #malleus x male reader #malleus x reader #malleus draconia #twst malleus #diasomnia #malleus x yuu

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patheticpaprika · 1 year

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Goncharov: Fandom's Struggle Between Fanon vs. Canon and How That's Created A Mythos Rivaling The Greeks

A tag ramble to this post that got away from me and became too long to feel okay putting in the tags lol. It can be easily read as a stand alone though.

It's absolutely FASCINATING to me being able to both watch and participate in the Goncharov (?)fandom(?). It's taking everything that fandom culture is and letting it run free without any barriers to stop it.

Because frankly, I can't think of anything (to my knowledge) quite like it in recent history to reach such a scale. Both the ability to write stories down and the rise of copyright have had a significant impact on the way stories are told. We went from a storytelling culture that slowly evolved each story told by the person telling it, to one that is very close-handed to the narratives created.

And yes, to some extent, this twisting and evolving still happens in fandoms to the point that fanon and canon can become so separated it feels jarring. But that's just it isn't it? There always remains the canon. That will always be the true story. Fanfiction will forever be fanfiction, no matter how much we want it to be "real." You can whittle away at the narrative to shape it into something more appealing, but it will always be stuck as a block of wood.

Yet, the very fact that fanon exists proves that we never lost that want to change stories and make them a little bit our own. All that we lost was the medium to do so. Evolve something too far, and it won't be the same, will it? We're stuck in the confines of "canon."

I have seen fanfiction of fanfiction before, but it tends to quite quickly pitter out without its own foundation to stand upon. More can be added to the universe, but what's there does not change. It does not evolve the way a story passed down orally does; in a story spoken, the canon is forced to slowly change by the memory and style of the speaker. A classic game of telephone.

Goncharov however? There is no original story; there is no true canon. Not only is the story evolving freely from storyteller to storyteller, but the only reason there is even a coherent story in the first place is that there are multiple storytellers weaving the tale at once yet also expecting you to fill in the gaps.

It's like we're all playing that one writing game where each person writes a sentence back and forth to create a story. Yet, instead of you and one friend, we're playing it on this gargantuan sitewide scale that can't possibly all be connected into a singular coherent narrative. But you're not supposed to be able to. Each person can choose what they want to know it as. It's like some big giant exploratory choose-your-own-adventure book. The framework is there, but it's going in 50 different directions and you can always add another one in just for fun. You discover the story as you read, but only the bits you like get added on.

It's fucking incredible.

We all see each piece of media through our own personal lenses but never like this?? Not to this extent. We're all collectively joining together to obsess over the little ideas in our heads we got from each other's prompts and are excitedly spewing them regardless of how contradictory they are. We do something similar brainstorming with others but not with 12k messages in a single day.

Would this have even been possible before the rise of social media? Not to mention the strong sense of community Tumblr has that is so rare to see with such a large amount of people. There's more people than you could ever know on this site but we all act like some deranged extended family. Yes, people can work together but so rarely do people that vary so greatly in personality and life experiences, get together in such larger numbers to do a little silly goofy CREATE AN ENTIRE STORY THAT DOESN'T EXIST.

We pull shenanigans like this all the time. But this time it's not like eeby deeby or even the mishapocolyse; this time we're seeing the power of an entire community working together to create not only layers and layers of memes but layers of memes shaping an entire mythos. It's like we're the Greeks thinking up stories of our gods but instead it's a homoerotic mafia movie from 1973 written by Matteo JWHJ 0715 and Martin Scorsese that all started with a picture of a shoe.

We have stumbled across something fascinating and new. This may not be the first mafia movie that's been thought up and played around with but this is absolutely the first to be created by thousands of people working together but also towards their own individual goal/story. We're seeing the power that created mythology being wielded by fandom culture, and it's letting it evolve like no other story has.

It's free from the confines of prescribed canon, but there is so much being created that can be canon if you want it to be. This isn't changing one by one like some spoken tale towards exponential growth either. This has been created like one spectacular big bang. We had a funny post of a boot, and then we had a poster and that was enough to make Tumblr go collectively insane. (Not that we weren't already.) I want to (politely) shake all of you by the shoulders till everyone realizes how crazy this all is.

This story is ours, all of ours. Goncharov (1973) is held together by the power of belief and love for it. We have fragments of canon, yes, but it only exists because we want it to. And God-damn it, I hope we do it again. Together we can create things that we'd never thought could exist (and in this case still doesn't).

-We- are strong. Please never forget that.

As it now 6am and I have not slept, I will leave you with a quote; Goncharov's final solemn plea as he slowly bled to death, for I feel it's in an odd way rather fitting.

"What is the dust but a remnant of what we once were, all around us coated with it.

But we brush it away in search of something else. Not everything that mattered once matters now.

Yet you seem to think that's the only way, just keep dusting it.

You never stop to think that some things we search for might not be worth keeping.

Nothing has meaning unless we continue to think it does.

So please... I beg of you, can't we just move on and let this sickening contempt between us dissolve into dust?"

#goncharov #goncharov (1973)#meta #goncharov meta #fandom culture #fanfiction #paprika's pantry of posts

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smol-and-scared · 5 months

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G/t Analysis: Gods Among Mice

Before I begin, I want to say two things:

This post is not meant to disparage anyone or question their value as people, all of this is exploration of linguistics, its cultural implications and potential narratives that could arise from them.

It is not a statement of fact or a claim I’m making.

Also… Let’s put aside the “Step on me Goddess” bullshit that has unfortunately plagued much of the g/t community’s DMs (It deserves to be called out, but not what this is about)

I will be using ‘God’ as a gender-neutral term here.

The God-like power of Size💪

Throughout history, Gods have often been depicted as being physically massive. This makes sense, as physical power is the most easily understood form of power. Likewise, a creature's size is one of the most universally recognized sign of one's physical power. So it's a good way to instantly depict the strength of a God. And these depictions have had a weird memetic side effect: The idea that 'massive size' makes a creature 'God-like'.

This does have a bit of psychological merit. If mountain-sized Giants actually existed, (without our arch-nemesis: 🔥the fucking square-cube law🔥) their full size and strength would be so hard for humans to understand that their power is basically arbitrary. At which point it becomes indistinguishable from Godhood. Also, our primitive lizard-brains evolved to fear much larger creatures. And fearing your gods is a major part of many religions.

Because of this there are dozens upon dozens of G/t fics, comics, etc; where the larger party is compared to or (metaphorically) referred to as, a God. In the case of actual giants and characters growing larger, this makes complete sense and is usually well-suited to the narrative.

But in my eternal quest for more angst™ I’ve recently started to question it’s use in Human/tiny stories. It feels kinda… lazy? I mean, not in the context of the story, many fantastic fics do it. But it just feels like it was copied over from the giant fics and never fully questioned or explored.

Okay, but what if: 🤏 smol.

Now obviously, all of this depends on the exact size difference, scenario and world-building of the story. But I still think it applies to a huge amount of fics who play up the Human/tiny size difference as ‘God-like’.

I personally think If a tiny views their resident human as a God-like figure (with all of the fear and awe that entails) …then they are optimistically delusional.

Because Gods are, in most cultures, special.

I have yet to see a fic where the Tiny is struck by the simple and harrowing realization that the humans they view as unstoppable, God-like entities are... in fact, painfully average.

It’s one thing to live in terror of the massive entity that could kill you in an instant. It’s an entirely further step to realize that there are dozens, if not hundreds of them between you and the nearest human-free environment.

And what if the Tiny realizes that their human isn’t even average? Imagine their horror when they realize that the person who is so big and powerful that they can barely even grasp it… is some 4’ 3” (~130cm) little stick? And the average human could snap ‘their human’ in half like a stale fuckin’ Cheeto.

Objectively, the Tiny knew this. They knew that the human they live with was small and weak compared to the others. But they never had an opportunity to actually understand it. And nothing gets that message across like seeing the 'God' of their tiny little world casually picked up and playfully carried on someone’s shoulder.

And It still gets worse...

Depending on the setting, the Tiny may not know or feel connected to any kind of civilization (A borrower colony, a scavenger camp, etc). This is especially true if Tinies are rare and/or oppressed.

And if that Tiny were to realize how average their 'God-like' human was? It would break them in the most pitiful way.

Because that ‘God’ isn’t a god. They’re average. They have a job. They have hobbies and friends. Things that this Tiny could never even dream of having. And that’s normal. That’s expected. They get to live, instead of just survive. Because they’re a person and that’s what people do.

And if their ‘God’ is just a person-

“Then…what does that make me?”

In conclusion:

I believe a character referring to someone as a God/Goddess implies that the speaker is a ‘person’ and they are looking at something greater. It’s ‘Normal’ looking up at ‘Godhood'.

But given the right story, plus a healthy amount of fear and awe. I think many Tinies would start to understand how small they are. And that they’ve been looking up at ‘Normal’ the whole time.

#g/t #g/t writing #g/t community #g/t angst #tinies #borrowers #giant/tiny #giant tiny #please read the warnings #If you feel like you're just surviving instead of living: You are not less of a person. I wish you the best #I was just examining how a character in that situation might feel

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reimeichan · 2 months

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I hope you don't mind us asking, but how can/did you tell you might have subsystems?

It took us a loooooot of getting to know our system, talking to the various parts of us, trying to do system mapping then re-mapping and more re-mapping, and a lowering of dissociation, before we realized what our subsystem structures looked like.

We suspected we had subsystems pretty early on; we read some articles and blog posts by others defining the word itself, and though we didn't really have "proof" that we had subsystems back then, we were open to the idea and would play around with the thought every once in a while. The term itself resonated with us in some way.

Then, as we continued to do system mapping, we noticed that certain alters would be more connected to each other in a way we couldn't concretely explain outside of "vibes". Yellow and Purple were our two biggest culprits, though we also noticed a similar connection between Cyan and Gray. Eventually, we noticed that certain alters could be grouped, so we tried to better understand what those groups may be and how they were connected.

For a while, system mapping more or less looked like... uhhhh...

Yeah. We kept trying to map and remap the system, and it seemed like each grouping we found made a little bit of sense but didn't explain the full picture. It sometimes even felt like we had multiple subsystem structures overlapping each other (spoiler alert: we do).

At some point, we were just talking to our friends when one of them mentioned how there seemed to be a "main trio" that, while disconnected from each other, seemed to otherwise be the cornerstones of our system. And that made something click for us. We were so busy trying to get into the details that we'd completely overlooked the bigger picture. Well, we were also too dissociated to actually really notice it ourselves. Having people outside of the system notice something like that was hugely helpful and gave us a major breakthrough in understanding our system structure.

However, we were still more or less guessing and making theories at this point, even if these theories made more sense than anything else we'd tested out up until this point. We also accepted that while we did have this larger overarching structure of three major subsystems, our earlier findings for the smaller overlapping subsystems were likely also accurate. It took all of us working together to integrate further so that we could actually communicate with each other and feel each other, and also understanding our own trauma histories better before we were finally able to confidently say yes, this is how our system is structured and this is why it was structured this way.

I hope that answered your question, anon.

#subsystems #did #dissociative identity disorder #actually did #actuallydid #did osdd #osddid #cdd #system stuff #did subsystem #did system #by gray

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jpitha · 1 year

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Time to Go

Back when the Human and K’laxi first met, the first K’laxi ship that the humans met was the Unimminen, a research ship, on the run from a Xenni destroyer group, and was rescued by the human scout ship Longview. While fleeing the destroyer group, the humans outfitted the K’laxi ship with their wormhole generator and enough batteries to run it once. As they were doing final checks, they fell under attack:

The noise of the alarms was all around N'ren and it hurt her ears. It bothered the humans too, but it seemed to energize them. They all got more focused, more serious and moved faster.

A human was shouting at her in that staccato language they had, full of fricatives and harsh consonants. Their ship AI, back on board the Unimminen had opened communications with the Longview's AI, and Unimminen sent along updates to their translator modules real-time to help understand the human's speech, but it was still more of a sanitized and generalized version of what they actually said. It still go the point across. It was time to go. Now.

"But, the checks aren't finished!" N'ren said, worried.

*static* "No. No time. Go Now. Your ship talk to our ship. They figure it out." *static* The human was hurriedly putting on an armored pressure suit while talking to N'ren.

"Human Francine is right N'ren." Unimminen said through his radio. The Longview and I have worked out the details and I know how to work the wormhole generator. They have given us enough batteries to run it once, and we should be able to "link" back to K'lax direct! I can't believe I'm talking to an AI from a sapient group that has never made contact! This is so fascinating!"

While N'ren put on her pressure suit - unfortunately not armored like the humans' - she wondered why the Unimminen was sounding so excited. They had never exhibited this kind of behavior before. It was more like she was talking with a person than a ship.

As N'ren tightened the last ring on her gloves, she felt, rather than heard the strikes. Huge booming thumps along the bottom of the human ship and suddenly her suit shrieked that the pressure was dropping rapidly. The Xenni scored a hit nearby!

Her large inner ears coupled with her prehensile tail gave her a better sense of balance than the humans and she was able to feel the Longview start to rotate along it's axis.

"What's going on?" she said over her suit radio in the general channel.

"Longview is rolling to keep your ship out of the firing line." Francine said "Longview big, old ship, she can take it" she said, and grinned through her helmet. She put her hand on N'ren's shoulder and pushed. "Go. Now. To ship." There was another explosion, this one larger. "RUN"

****

As N'ren ran down the halls of the Longview, Unimminen reminded her to run on the right side of the hall as humans - all in pressure suits - ran with purpose around her. Some were carrying weapons and others were carrying firefighting equipment. "Why the weapons?" N'ren said to her ship.

"They're preparing to be boarded." Unimminen said.

"WHAT? The Xenni don't do that!"

"The Humans do, apparently."

N'ren made it to the umbilical that connected the two ships. As she entered the docking room a guard shouted "CAPTAIN ON DECK!" At that command, all of the humans in the room abruptly stopped what they were doing, and standing straight and tall, saluted her.

Taken aback at this show of respect from other sapients, N'ren didn't know what to do. Unimminen said in her ear "Longview says you're supposed to say 'as you were.'" And to her credit, N'ren gave it her very best, pronouncing the human words as best as she could. The ritual satisfied, the humans continued their work.

A human engineer came up to her and said "Captain, your ship is ready. Our ship taught your ship how to work the wormhole generator and we're ready to set you off and escape. We're going to push you with the docking arms, so don't wait to fire your main drive. We'll be fine." He grinned and stepped back.

"But, what about you? What are you going to do?" she asked.

"Oh, Longview is very old. She was a Starjumper before we developed wormhole generators. We're more engine that ship. We'll turn our Stardrive on them as they come around. No worries!"

"No, I meant your wormhole generator. Aren't we taking it?"

Impossibly, the engineer grinned harder. "Oh, no we bottled a message and used the generator to link a beacon back to human space. Someone will come and bring us a new generator in a week or two. We'll be fine."

More explosions wracked the ship. The engineer looked serious. "Go, now. We'll be fine, but if you hold up much longer there won't be any ship left! I'm glad we met. Go home and tell your people."

****

Back on the command deck of the Longview, the ship was relaying information to Captain Melody.

"Captain, the Unimminen has been pushed away, they're boosting from us at their full speed. A small group of Xenni ships has peeled off and giving chase."

At that, there was a blinding flash, and the ship was gone.

"Ahh, looks like Unimminen figured out the wormhole generator." Captain Melody said. "Excellent. Longview, shall we shake off our attackers?"

"With pleasure Captain. Permission to engage War Emergency Power and thrust at 6 gees for 3 minutes?"

"Permission granted. Please warn everyone first however."

From a distance, if someone was watching the battle, they would see the Longview begin to rotate along the axes of the massive flywheels deep in the center of the ship. It oriented itself until the rear of the ship was facing the Xenni. As they pressed their attack, the Longview lit its old Stardrive and a white jet of flame, kilometers long shot out the back as the ship thrust away at a withering six gees. Everyone on board was secured in acceleration couches or command chairs and while it was unpleasant, it was over soon enough.

The Xenni ships were destroyed the instant the torch of exhaust played over their hulls. None survived to report the incident to Fleet Command.

#humans are space oddities #humans are space capybaras #humans are warriors #humans are space orcs #humans lend a hand #humans are deathworlders #sci fi writing #writing

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fakegingerrights · 9 months

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Walk By Faith (6)

[A/N: Kinda a filler chapt, but brotherly fluff at the end. Also shorter because this section hates me I hate physical fight scenes with a passion and want to get to next chapter's angst bomb.]

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"The atmospheric disturbances are wrecking hell on our communications." 03 reported, taking in the huge tattered venator hull in front of them.

"No." Crosshair's cool voice is almost a serpentine hiss as he struggles with a myriad of emotions he wasn't prepared for. Hunter was there. Tech and Wrecker too. His brothers...

The sense of longing and crushing guilt hit him like a tidal wave. He could see why the Kaminoans insisted on the chips now. It would certainly make jobs like this... easier.

"We're being jammed." He informed them, a mixture of anger and hope and grief and... fear? Play across his face in rapid succession hidden by his helmet. "They're still on board."

"Orders, sir?" ES-02 asked cooly, surveying the wrecked venator with apparent contempt.

"Fan out. They've likely left their ship in the main hanger, unless there's a larger, more accessible hole in the hull of the ship. Check the bridge and armories, as well as food and medical storages. They're probably scavenging what they can." He directed the white armored regs. "You three, with me. 03, get a trace on that jam." He ordered.

"...Sir?" 03 cocked his head to the side. "You can't trace jamming signals."

Crosshair ground his teeth in frustration, really missing Tech right then.

"A jamming signal can be traced like any other signal, 03. Instead of a 'Positive' addition on the scanner, you're looking for negative space. The jamm will be strongest at the source, like any signal. Use your scanner to find the deepest 'hole.'" He explained, his voice mockingly patient. 02 was the only one with a presence of mind to not gape at him. "Well?" He snapped, and 03 gulped and returned to his datapad.

"We're going to follow that signal right to Tech's datapad. Whatever you do, never engage my brothers one on one. I won't be the one to drag your corpse to the shuttle if you do." He warned icily.

Each one of his squad nodded in turn, acknowledging his words.

They set off into the venator, 03 taking point with Crosshair just behind.

"Sir, it looks like they've stopped just ahead." 03 alerted him quietly.

"Silence your annunciators, and your internal comms. If Hunter's up there he'll hear you anyways." They crept forward as a unit, but the attack came from behind. 02 let out a muffled yelp as she took a stun bolt to the back.

Crosshair wheeled around, coming face to face with Echo as his cyborg brother bore down on him. Crosshair dodged the strike at his head with Echo's flesh hand and caught his scomplink. He used Echo's added weight of the cybernetics against him as Crosshair twisted his scomp behind his back.

"Echo." He greeted cooly. "Where're the others?" He growled next to Echo's helmet. Echo just snarled and let his cybernetic arm fold at an angle that would have meant a shattered elbow on a human's arm. Instead he used his scomp as a turning point to pull Crosshair forward and send an only slightly awkward kick at his former squadmate's head. He had gotten far more comfortable with the inhuman movements the cybernetics granted him.

Crosshair ducked and the kick hit the wall where his head had been. The durasteel wall crumpled slightly where the kick had hit.

A second hit cracked along the side of his head, a far less powerful blow from Echo's scomplink but still enough to make his vision sparkle and blur for a second. He hissed as he put a hand to his head, making sure the connecters didn't lose touch with his skin again as recovered just in time to pull Echo off of a bloody 04, who had disregarded his orders and tried to face Echo down on her own.

Crosshair slid his fingers into the chink at the back of Echo's armor, pinching hard on the soft spot where metal met skin under his blacks. He didn't have to see his brothers face to know how the blood had suddenly drained from it, pupils blown wide as he froze. Crosshair had talked him down from fights enough to know how it went. He kicked the back of Echo's mechanical legs and sent him sprawling, using his trauma response against him.

He hated how dirty the trick was, how it itched under his skin that he had to resort to something like that, but his vision was still sparkling and jittering until he felt motion sick, so he forced himself to move. A whack on the side of his helmet corrected most of it.

"Sir, we've found their ship in the main hanger, but it looks like they've abandoned it." A reg's voice crackled over his comm.

"Lock it down. Don't let them escape." He ordered, glancing back at Echo and expecting to find him frozen on the floor. To his surprise, his brother was gone. Crosshair pressed his lips into a thin line.

"03, the trace?" He switched frequencies.

"I've lost it. Last known position was in the engine cone. They couldn't possibly-"

"Stay on their trail. I'm going to find a choke point and cut them off." Crosshair ordered, forcing his worn body into a loping run as he took off towards the engine cone.

He stumbled a few times as his helmet fizzled in and out of sight, but found a good position overlooking the exit from the cone. A series of explosions went off, making him tense as he crawled forward on his belly and got into position in time to fire off a warning shot at Hunter's head, watching his former sergeant jerk back in surprise.

"Your move, Hunter." He growled, letting himself sink into the cold rage that made it easier to focus on the job done and not the fact that that's his brother.

His brother who loved him, his brother who sat up with him after surgery. His brother who would never leave him behind if he had a choice. His brother who he fought for, who had his back-

His brother the traitor. He focused on that thought. Hunter had betrayed him, left him, forgotten-

A low hum rumbled though the ship. Crosshair's hackles rose as the cone of the engine began to spin.

His squad was still in there

He crawled back, seeking lower ground as the engine slowly turned on, rotation and heat increasing by the second. They were going to try and roast the rogue clones alive. He hadn't given that order, so who had?

He didn't have time to think about it as another chain of explosions went off, bringing the cone of the engine down in a tremendous crash. Crosshair took cover as the engine exploded outward, blue ionized fire cooking everything that couldn't get away.

It raced closer and Crosshair dove for cover, but his vision chose at that moment to flicker and go out, leaving him scrabbling in the darkness with no direction but away.

Then the darkness gave way to heat. Blistering, burning heat so hot it froze his skin where it touched, leaving a stinging numbness behind. He was half sure he could feel his armor dripping down his leg. Distractedly, his panicked thoughts recalled a rant Tech had gone on about a lifetime ago about how your eyes melted first when you burned to death.

Crosshair rather liked his eyes unmelted.

He was having a hard time breathing, his helmet filters struggling to compensate as all the oxygen was sucked out of his hideyhole. And just like that, it was over. He felt the heat dissipate but his flesh still burned as cool, oxygenated air hit it in the absence of the fire. That was a good thing, right? Wrecker said when he lost his eye it was so burnt he didn't feel a thing...

Crosshair's last thought was of his brothers as he slipped into a painless oblivion.

---

Consciousness came slowly. The first thing he was aware of was a dull, thrumming ache that ripped through him. He groaned softly, and someone shifted nearby.

Crosshair instantly relaxed, hearing the familiar footsteps of a brother, his pain wracked mind too tired to comprehend more than relief at the comfort as the brother carefully slid his helmet off. He was grateful, it was uncomfortable to sleep in. His whole body felt raw, sunburnt. More serious wounds pulsed at the edge of his frayed mind, begging to be acknowledged, but he ignored them in favor of the hands that carded through sweat soaked hair, drawing a reedy whine from his tight throat.

He knew those fingers. Had he fallen asleep on the deck outside again?

Tech brushed his hair out of his eyes, which itched something fierce. he whined as a gentle thumb brushed up a puffy eyelid, but nothing came into view.

The ground was too warm, but the air was cool and he gasped at it, waking up more fully as the ringing in his ears began to subside. Tech was fidgeting with something nearby, but they weren't in their barracks, this was a battle field.

And he was supposed to be hunting Tech. But those gentle hands... the proximity of his closest brother...

Crosshair ached in a way he never had before, more than just the pain of his burns and bruises, but a soul deep ache that told him his family was here, was right there less than an arms length away, but he couldn't reach them.

Tech's hands were gloveless and cool against his skin as he tilted Crosshair's head to the side, a blessed balm on his too hot skin.

"Tech..." He croaked, but a hand was clapped over his mouth. Crosshair hated how pathetic his brother's name sounded, and to his relief and horror, he felt a tear trace down the side of his head from his sightless eyes as he tried to chase after his older brother's touch.

Tech seemed to understand, pressing his forehead against Crosshair's in a kedalbe kiss, the ridge of his goggles pressing into Crosshair's face. Tech always understood.

There was a shuffling as Tech sat Crosshair up a bit despite his injuries, gently placing his helmet on. His filters kicked in, giving him access to cool, clean air, even if it smelled slightly like burnt rubber from his damaged helmet. A few seconds later and his vision flickers to life, bringing his brother into focus. Tech doesn't say anything, but he puts a hand on Crosshair's shoulder and squeezes, squeezes so hard it hurts even through his armor.

"Fan out, we need to find the Commander." A voice came from above them. ES-04, he distantly remembered. Tech glanced up at the voices and shadows above him and caught his brother's eyes one last time before vanishing over a ledge and into the smoldering wreck where the engine had been blown apart.

It wasn't until later, much later, that Crosshair wondered how Tech had known to fix his upgraded helmet, specifically to restore his vision.

Taglist:

@the-hexfiles @moon-wrecked @stunkbiggu @urfriendlyneighbornightfury @followthepurrgil @endo-bunny @renon4224 @tecker @rinwritesfics @pb-jellybeans @merkitty49 @chicknstripz @bambambunny @yeeteth-the-raven

#soft crosshair #the bad batch #tbb crosshair #crosshair x reader #tbb crosshair x reader #crosshair imagine #tbb crosshair imagine #hurt/comfort #crosshair #WalkByFaith #GingerWrites

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goldporces · 9 months

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i really just think that EVERYONE needs to rewatch season 1 with the knowledge and the bigger understanding of the depth of crowley's and aziraphale's communication issues. we all have analyzed it through and through at this point but the smallest things in the script of season 1 make the most sense now.

remember the whole thing with the bookshop burning down? obviously a very scary and traumatizing moment for crowley. but here's the thing: both of them never find out *why* it burned down. both of them have a very good reason to think that it's either the armageddon (which, wouldn't make sense really, a fire can't just start in the middle of a literal tornado without something else starting it), or - it was heaven's doing. crowley immediately thinks that surely all the angels found out what aziraphale was trying to do this whole time and got rid of heaven's embassy on earth to punish aziraphale, and the dots connect even further for him as he finds out that aziraphale's body was discorporated. aziraphale, on the other hand, doesn't tell him *why* he was discorporated, and focuses on the larger issue at hand. aziraphale DOESNT TELL HIM what happened to him and his body and in return, crowley DOESNT TELL HIM that he thinks heaven burned their safeplace down. but even if HE THINKS that it was all heaven's doing, he chooses to guard this knowledge away from aziraphale. just like he did with aziraphale's failed execution by hellfire. he DOESNT SAY "heaven tried to kill you", he says "they'll leave us alone, for a bit". he DOESNT SAY "heaven burned down your bookshop", he says "it burned down, remember?". he is trying so hard to protect aziraphale from heaven and at the same time confirms aziraphale's thoughts about heaven and hell both: heaven is good, hell is bad, and one is obviously better than the other. the miscommunication runs so deep that their parts in the dialogue in s2ep6, to them, sound like: "I love you so much and you know so well that hell hurts you so deep, but I am able to make heaven better for you, because from what i know, it is inherently the better place" and "I love you so much and I don't understand how you don't know heaven is just as bad as hell, they tried to kill you, I don't want you to be hurt again" but this is not what they say, of course. because they don't tell each other anything.

#im fucking devastated #good omens #good omens 2 spoilers #good omens 2

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alyjojo · 2 years

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PAC - ❤️‍🔥 What Are You Looking For In a Relationship? - August 2022

Pile 1 - Green 💚:

Venus - Sagittarius - 12th House

- The attraction of insights to understand your faith.

- Pleasure from the wisdom of hidden tendencies.

- Good times resulting from the understanding of large institutions or overwhelming events.

Page of Swords - Knight of Swords - 3 Cups

Dreaming Way: Stork, Mountain, Man & Bear

Additional energy: Neptune & Aries

You crave someone larger than life, someone that will make you understand the answers to your philosophical questions and why nothing before them ever worked out. A soulmate, one with fire 🔥 in them, motivation, ambition, excitement. When they are happy you want to physically feel their happiness, sadness, anger, lust. Power, intelligence, communication & passion are traits you desire. Every fire sign is out here and there is heavy air energy as well, a fire/air person may be exactly who you’re looking for. You’re definitely a dreamer, the kind that wishes for a true soulmate, but you want someone that takes ACTION on those dreams and actually follows them. With that being said, you also crave stability and someone responsible, someone that’s been through enough bs in their lives already that they’ve learned and grown from it. Something real. An adventure that doesn’t end with someone you can depend on.

Some of you are single parents, could be between 1-3 kids. More than anything you want honest & open communication, a love of ideas and sharing them. Someone that finishes your sentences and even your ideas, and makes them even better than you could have thought of. Romance, passion, and honesty are the keys to happiness, and you’ve realized it’s not one more than the other. You won’t settle for anything less than a connection you feel is -the- one, a soulmate. Your Dreaming Way cards point again towards children, with Mountain attached. You may find it hard to find a stable person because you have kids, they have kids, or your ex was this mountain in your way. Having children may have proven difficult for you and it’s what you want the most, or your ex didn’t want any and you do, so that’s now #1 on your priority list for singles. Children with a stable person, man or woman. Man could be you, your person, a father figure, someone that’s instilled this goal of what a “man” should be in a very orthodox family sense, that’s what you want. But…with Sagittarius, and 12th house here, it’s so much more than that as well. This is the whole package, depth, fun, and commitment. Up until now you may have repeatedly chosen people that weren’t ready for all of this, and caused the Mountain between you, them, and your goals. If so, you’ve realized how to spot that type, they’ve had a powerful impact on your psyche and you’ll never fall for another like that again. A small side story I’m getting is not with children, but rather multiple partners you desire, a poly lifestyle, one that is free, communicated and agreed upon, there’s a level of detachment here with swords, excitement, passion, and still a deep commitment, just more of you. Children of or between people may have caused an issue with this lifestyle before if that’s the case. If the sign is to be taken literally, Neptune actually enters Aries for the next 12 years in 2025, some of you may not meet this person you desire until then.

Pile 2 - Orange 🧡:

Saturn - Sagittarius - 2nd House

- Be realistic about your highest ideals patiently.

- Be concerned about the rules of what you want.

- You must wait before you can get it out to the world and get what you need.

8 Pentacles - Ace of Swords - Queen of Swords

Dreaming Way: Stork, Birds, Lady

Additional energy: Sun & Libra

Definitely Libra energy here with their court card as well, you could end up with one, be one, or value fairness, balance, truth and working things out with communication. The opposite energy, Aries, is here too and it’s coming up as more of a burden to you. Someone that takes charge and controls your decisions isn’t what your looking for, you don’t want a “boss”, or someone that’s out for themselves over others, you want an equal partner. Or, considering the flow in this read, you could be the one that is more Aries or Aries rising, you’re the dominant career focused person and you want someone more domestic and giving to your needs.

The other story I have here is no matter which gender, you want someone that wants to parent in a stay at home way, either gender, it’s part of your personal value system with 2nd House. You don’t want to work, or you don’t want your person to. Children are here, whether you have them or want them. You may feel that having “two bosses” or two workers in one house is a burden on the family dynamic, and your cards indicate that though you may want this, it may not be realistic for you to do. If this one is your story then you’re likely to have to give in a little on this one, your person may not want to give up their career or they/you can’t afford to run a family on one income. You could also be the one that wants to work from home. Something is not working out there. Your Dreaming Way cards match the cards above them. If children aren’t involved, Stork is progress, movement forward, good news and it’s connected to 8 Pentacles and communication. You want communication more than anything else in a relationship, and it looks like you’ll get that with no issues, but you may have to compromise on some deeply ingrained family values due to money, unless you want to compromise your freedom altogether, which you don’t want either. In some way, that will be inevitable. Sagittarius placements may be difficult for you to deal with, or a sense of giving or receiving freedom, especially in terms of money or resources. You may have dealt with controlling people in the past. At least one of you in this pile are that person yourself. You have this idea of loving being a providing/serving dynamic and will realize this will have to change somewhere along the line. You & your person will have to decide how to move forward together, there’s no room for demands or control here, that’s the balanced part of a fair & balanced relationship, and that’s what you want after all.

Pile 3 - Blue 💙:

Neptune - Aries - 1st House

- The idealization of energies to meet the challenge of who you are.

- Confusion regarding your desires regarding your desires 😆 ???

- Sacrifice resulting from the honesty and strength of your actions.

6 Swords - Knight of Wands - Page of Pentacles

Dreaming Way: Tree, Coffin, Garden, Scythe

Additional energy: Sun & Sagittarius

You could be an Aries or have Aries in your chart, your person could as well, I’m also getting Taurus & Sagittarius. You seem to be in something currently already, but this person only upsets you and continues to do so, it’s like they’re on a loop. These oracle cards show there’s growth, and it dies, and then there is growth, and it dies. These deaths tear you apart, when it’s great it’s amazing and when it’s bad it’s the worst thing ever. Your dream is confidently taking the reins of your own life, being a leader that directs how things are going to go. You seem to be confused by what you would actually say, what you would do, or where you would go if you could. You could know that you want to passionately take charge in some other direction, but don’t know what that may actually be. You could be looking for someone more sure of themselves than you are. It’s like thinking you’ll know what you want based on what they want, which is good for compatibility (with anyone) but could cause problems later if you base your whole life on someone else’s goals.

I get a very young energy from this pile, some of you don’t know who you even are yet and need the time and space to discover that for yourselves. Family & friends can help, they know you best. The only thing you are sure of is that you are tired of temporary people, or those that are afraid of commitment. They’re in and out, in and out, is it good is it bad, are they coming or going, is it something you said or did? No. You have goals (loosely) and you want to start planning for your future in a more solid and practical way. You know that reciprocity and equal give and take is what is necessary in a relationship, you could be trying to model after your parents in some way (a good way). It feels like you’re still involved with the past stuff, the in and out person needs to find the door locked before it’s possible, but it looks like your goal for 10 Cups is what you’ll not rest until you find. Just try not to morph yourself into someone you’re not to seem attractive or appealing to someone, or simply because someone else is that way. I get a chameleon vibe from this pile and it’s because of a lack of self confidence…which means you can be easily taken advantage of if you’re not careful 😕

Pile 4 - Yellow 💛:

Mars - Scorpio - 4th House

- Energize the extraordinary power of prayer as you did in the past.

- Confront the highest and lowest aspects of your home base or family.

- Force yourself to control the situation and do what makes you feel secure.

8 Swords - 9 Wands - The Hanged Man

Dreaming Way: House, Choices, Sun

Additional energy: Mercury & Cancer

These signs may be your person, they may be a family member that has caused you pain, they may also be yourself or just describe this energy. Spirit is not even responding in the way that I hoped they would for all of these, but there must be a reason. They don’t want you to focus on relationships, because you’ve been through hell. Either a father figure or a partner has abandoned the family dynamic you’re a part of, and you’ve been left in a lot of pain, with a lot of questions that are unanswered, with a feeling that you can’t do anything about it. Relationship wise, you’re afraid of them, or carrying this on into another connection with the same results. I’m kind of getting the feeling that if you rush into another one, that’s what would happen. The same thing. It’s a cycle that will continue until you force it to break, by going through a dark night of the soul, seeing the truth of your family dynamics for every shadow and hidden or unsaid thing that exists, and how that same pattern has played out in your own life. What is your role? It can’t be everything of course, but you do have a role, there is something you’ve done recently that is the same as either something in the past or something your family member has done.

This can be a karmic lesson. But until you face it, see things clearly, learn, heal, and refuse to continue in this way, you’ll still feel trapped in this cycle of abandonment issues, a weary battle scarred state, and a lot of fear. Mercury in Cancer can be saying that your head and your thoughts are being manipulated by family, or affected, directed, impressioned upon, not your own. It can also be saying you’re an emotional thinker, and emotions tend to cloud things like logic and practicality. For some it’s the literal placement. Your oracle cards are all positive. Whatever this home situation is has caused major blocks in your life, you’re being told to take control of your own part in whatever this is, and make -your- own decisions moving forward. No guilt, no sideways tactics, no manipulation, there are a lot of choices available to you and all of them will make you happy with Sun here. Relationships aren’t the focus, happiness is, but first you have to take your own power back from someone else you’ve given it to, whether literally or emotionally or what have you. There’s a feeling that you’ll find exactly who you need once you decide what you want and get moving in that direction. A side note, don’t compare your journey to anyone else’s. Everyone has a struggle they don’t talk about, everyone has felt pain, and everyone meets different goals on different parts of their path at all ages, you’re doing just fine.

Pile 5 - Red ❤️:

Uranus - Aquarius - 6th House

- An unusual example of genius to experiment with service to others.

- A different way of looking at the discoveries of what is good for us.

- An unexpected change resulting from the eccentricity of your work.

7 Swords - Strength - 6 Pentacles

Dreaming Way: Clover, Book, Child

Additional energy: Uranus & Sagittarius

You want someone that values what you do for a living, because whatever it is you do holds a lot of weight over your life. It could be relating to children, for a small percentage, it could cause for you to be kinda unreliable when it comes to relationships because your main priority is work. This is an energy of being called at all hours of the night and never really being able to *plan* anything in stone, you’re needed and it’s necessary. If you do something off the wall as a career, same thing, you want someone that understands and respects what you do. Children are involved in your life in some way, through work or experience, or you tend to want an independent life free of children at home, and that’s something that keeps you at a pause when it comes to any sort of dating. You’re an independent and career-oriented person, not a domestic caregiver, it’s just who you are, and you could feel your life and career are too chaotic for any of that anyway. It’s just not what you want.

Because of these things, you hold yourself back from giving fully or trying to get serious with anyone, it’s like you give up before even getting started. There is a lot of Aquarius energy here, even more with double Uranus, Taurus, Virgo, Leo, heavy fixed energy. This may be you or your person, or it describes your mentality of this is how it is and it’s staying that way. It has to. Either they’re on board or bye, there is no extra time to waste on casual, and you’re not committed enough for serious. It’s kind of a double edged sword there. You are extremely lucky and love to learn, you probably want someone within your field of work, or at least someone that understands what’s going on in your world, it’s definitely not a traditional career. Could be a writer, doctor, secret spy 😎 idk, there is something unscheduled and untethered about this. Either your desired person is equally chaotic in their work, involved in similar work, OR they’re the more fixed signs, they’re the solid and stable to your chaos. Some of you may not even really want a relationship, you just feel you should have one, and if so just wait until it feels right to you. Some of you only want a sneaky fling that you keep quiet and don’t really commit to, just to have someone around.

Pile 6 - Pink 💖:

Uranus - Sagittarius - 1st House

- Stir up the situation by using your highest ideals immediately.

- Be open to new ideas about the rules of the way you project yourself.

- Invent a way to get it out to the world and do it on your own.

3 Swords - 4 Swords - 8 Wands

Dreaming Way: Fox, Stork, Sun

Additional energy: Mars & Pisces

Here we have the fkboy/girl group. Both sides of the situation, the victims of temporary lovers and the lovers themselves will be here. If you are someone that rushes in and out of romantic entanglements with no commitment or care, many options on the table, then this message is a warning that you are the conniving and mischievous character, and you could end up with a baby because of it. For the other side of that coin, those with a history of attracting these folks, Spirit is asking you to look at how you present yourself, because you’re mirroring these people to attract them. There is a very spontaneous and up for anything energy in you, multiple options or people you’re dating or interested in. Mostly, you’re not being taken seriously because you’re not taking others seriously at the start, or you aren’t letting it be known up front that serious is what you want. At least half the people here don’t want that.

There is a group of people here that have been hurt by this personality and want to rush into something new as fast as possible to get over who hurt them prior. There’s a note here that you may be taken advantage of or it can end in pregnancy, could be both. Be very careful. In the cases of babies, that is something that will make you very happy, regardless of circumstances. It will all happen very fast in those situations. For most of you, this is Spirit saying to take a step back from this impulsive, passionate and loosely guarded fun *for tonight* energy, because Mars Pisces is acting with emotion, romance, much much depth. The jokester on the surface is bringing you jokesters. Some of that depth and dreamy romanticism is more the style of what you truly want…but you won’t entertain someone boring either, that’s certain. This is the Mutable pile, Sagittarius, Gemini and Pisces, plus heavy Libra are all here. If you take the time to plan what you really want, you’ll attract it. Don’t just fly by your pants and impulses 🤩 You could think you want someone like that, but they turn into Fox, deception, sneaky sly behaviors and aren’t faithful. Once you take a break, get serious and really plan what you want for yourself, moving forward should be much easier to get what you want, and it could all happen so fast your head might spin. It’s like Spirit is on standby waiting for you to just say the right words, from the right mindset & with the right intentions, more mature and authentic intentions, and it can be yours the next day.

#PAC #august 2022 #relationships #love #romance #dating #pick a card

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sp1resong · 11 months

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Lore 🫵

OKAY SO. uhh cw for talk of suicide... this is rain world so that's kind of a given but hey better safe than sorry

this au uses a tweaked version of my rewrite/oc lore, because hey, i have a perfectly good void stand-in all ready to go in the form of the Dark Water or Void Water (the stuff Bristlefrost drowned in, and also an important part of my OC Willowsong's story)!

There are a few mechanics that are relevant here:

The soul separates from the body a moment before death, and either joins a regional or cultural afterlife or wanders as a ghost for a while. Generally, if they do the latter, they join an afterlife eventually--the Sisters are, notably, an exception for this. The wandering is their afterlife.

Spirits fade over time, as they lose their sense of identity and 'tethers' to the waking world. Faded souls return to the 'cloud', so to speak, to eventually be reborn into a new body, keeping none of their memories.

The only thing that has been known to erase a soul from both waking world and afterlife wholly and entirely (or at least render it untraceable, somehow) is Void Water.

While on that last point, that has only ever been known to happen to one cat--and that's where we get into the plot, because that cat is Sliverstraw (Sliver of Straw).

She was a SkyClan cleric, well-respected and with a powerful connection to StarClan, but otherwise unremarkable. Some will claim that she grew... distant, in the time before her disappearance, but that's not really important. What's important is that she showed up one day, apparently scared out of her wits, and delivered an ominous prophecy before returning to the Moonpool to try and figure out what she'd seen--before vanishing, nowhere to be found. A thorough search was carried out, and the other clerics found that she was not in StarClan, either.

Right, the other clerics, those are important! all the main iterators are clerics Because i wanted to. There's:

Scarletsun (Seven Red Suns) of ThunderClan, and their apprentice Needlepaw (The Spearmaster)

Pebblestorm (Five Pebbles) and Moongaze (Looks to the Moon) of RiverClan

Lavenderfrost (Unparalleled Innocence) of WindClan

Howlheart (No Significant Harassment) of ShadowClan, and his apprentice Houndpaw (The Hunter)

Greywind (Grey/Chasing Wind) of SkyClan, former apprentice of Sliverstraw

In this universe, the Sliverists were just... your average, run-of-the-mill death cult where a bunch of people with fifty three different mental illnesses enabled each other. They maintained their anonymity by communicating via notes carved into pieces of tree bark and left at certain locations (although I don't doubt that some recognized one another by handwriting [pawwriting? clawwriting?]).

While they did influence Pebblestorm's mentality, it was ultimately Scarletsun that gave him the Big Idea, which... okay. in my heart the conversation went something like

Scarletsun: i think you should like drown yourself in holy water or something at this point i genuinely think that's the only thing that would fix you Pebblestorm: YOU'RE A FUCKING GENIUS

but like of course that won't ever be canon so yknow

either way. Pebbles tries to drown himself in the Moonpool. enters StarClan (or is it the Dark Forest?) instead. Tries to drown himself in their fucked up shadow lake Bristlefrost-style. However, Moon's figured out what Pebbles is trying to do at this point, and follows him into the afterlife to try and save him. She pulls him out of the water at a pivotal moment, leaving him functionally dead but his soul still bound to his body (not that he can use it), pretty much a ghost who can still sort of feel his corpse and is incapable of truly joining the afterlife or fading on account of this tether.

In his rage (at both Moon half-saving his life and his newfound state of existence), he turns and shoves her into the water. She is larger and stronger than him, but he catches her off-guard, and holds her there under the water for a moment before realizing what he's done and positively booking it out of there (if it sucks... hit da bricks! -friend ships -consequences of your actio -this mortal coil -too fancy afterlife -murder scene if your quick).

When neither Moon nor Pebbles returns from the Moonpool, Howlheart gets worried. He does not have a connection to StarClan himself (he's a cleric mostly for his skill in healing, rather than abilities as a medium), but he knows that something has most likely gone very, very wrong. And it was probably Pebblestorm's fault, because of course it was.

So he sends his apprentice Houndpaw to check on them. Pebblestorm, of course, is absent, but Houndpaw manages to pull Moongaze's spirit from the lake (the banks are steep enough that once you fall in, it is all but impossible to escape without help)--I say her spirit, because her body is, by this point, dead. She is in a similar position to Pebblestorm, however she cannot feel her body at all--she's just... almost entirely dead, but not quite dead enough to join the afterlife. Or have her body decay at normal speeds. (That comes in handy later.)

What no one accounted for is that dark water is highly corrosive, even in small doses, even when it does not break the skin or cause major damage, and capable of corrupting both souls and bodies even (and especially) before it pulls them apart. and, uh... that hunter sure can long legs !

Pebblestorm eventually settles in the cave systems beneath and around where they bury his body, Rock-style.

Arti and Gourmand aren't too important here--Arti (or Crimsonshade) was a clan-cat-turned-rogue who helped fight off a rogue group that had settled in Pebblestorm's caves (and also killed her first litter), while Gourmand (Claypelt) was a TNP-journey-gang-style scout for the Clans' relocation (which would, of course, leave Pebbles and Moon all alone). Monk (Dandelionpaw) and Survivor (Asterpaw) were a pair of apprentices that were separated from the group during said relocation.

Which leaves us with Rivulet and Saint! Rivulet (Ruffles) is a kittypet with unusual skills as a medium who wanders into Pebblestorm's tunnels by mistake. Pebblestorm, whose body has all but decayed, but who is still by some force bound here even as his soul grows weaker and weaker, instructs Ruffles to dig up Moongaze's corpse and bring it to the tunnels' central chamber.

Ruffles does as they are told (a normal cat's body would have long since decayed, but these circumstances are all but normal). Moongaze's ghost follows, and the two reunite for a brief moment before Pebblestorm does what he has long since decided he must do.

A mockery of a nine-lives ceremony, with only one life to give. He knows full well it will take almost everything out of him, but it works, at the very least. Moongaze is returned to her body to live out the rest of her expected lifespan (although with some complications on account of said body having been very dead for quite a while).

Ruffles eventually has to leave when their housefolk move, leaving the two ghosts (or... one ghost and one. whatever Moongaze is at this point) alone once more.

A year or two later, a flood caused by a summer storm makes Pebblestorm's part of the tunnels collapse. He no longer has the strength to leave, instead spending the rest of his time among the rubble.

The following year brings the coldest, bitterest winter either has ever seen--and with it a strange presence, the loner known only as Saint. Their origins are unclear, although Moon swears she sees a familiar glint in their eye when they first meet...

Regardless, they are perhaps the strongest medium in this world or the next. No one can quite figure out how they achieved such attunement, but--

They present Pebblestorm with a choice--cut his tethers and go to StarClan, or be erased from this world entirely. What he should have had or what he wanted. He responds with 'anything but this'. Or something along those lines, it's quite difficult for him to speak at this point.

Saint, ultimately, allows him to ascend to StarClan, to reunite with his old world (he will fade anyways, eventually, they reason. No need to erase a perfectly good soul). Eventually they do the same to Moon, which was... less warranted, but yknow. a saint's gotta do what a saint's gotta do (:

also Saint eventually goes on a frolick through StarClan and the Dark Forest, like they do in canon w/ Rubicon. saint will see a moonpool and go 'is anyone gonna jump in' and not wait for an answer

WOOO that was long. a lot of lore is still WIP but we ball

#spire rambles #spire answers #the star cycle #rain world #warrior cats #cw suicide mention #cw character death

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philcoulsonismyhero · 9 months

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Hey! I'm really excited that there are two butch characters in Red Shift Blue Shift, what are their relationships to each other and to the larger lesbian communities around them? Also, are there any trans women or transfeminine nonbinary characters in the cast, or in your other projects? (I tried sending an ask to the comic blog, but I couldn't find the option.)

Hey! (Turns out we hadn't switched asks on for the comic blog, thanks for pointing that out, the option should be there now!)

Oh I'm so glad you're excited about there being multiple butch characters in RSBS, that was something that was really important to us to include when we were building our cast. I'm very fond of them both, they're a great time.

It's hard to say too much about their relationship to each other without getting into spoiler territory, but Kamari is something of a wildcard character. She's working for a cause of her own, something that's sometimes at cross-purposes to the main team, which Georgie is part of, so there's a bit of plot-relevant antagonism there, at least in a big picture sense. It takes a wee while before Kamari interacts directly with any of the main team, although she'll be hanging around the edges of their activities and playing a major role in the other main thread of the story. Georgie and Kamari will end up connected eventually, although how is spoilers, but I can say that they're one of the (many, many) pairs of narrative foils in the comic. The story is going to be split into two major threads, the blue thread following Dan and their team, and the red thread following our masked antagonist and their allies, and Georgie and Kamari are one pair of characters that in some ways mirror each other across that divide and end up having an impact on each other over time as the story unfolds.

Which kind of links in to the next part of your question - Kamari, at the point we find her in the story, is quite isolated from anything really in the way of broader community. She did have that, once, and she doesn't anymore, and the story there is a big part of her character, along with where she ends up going from there. Georgie, on the other hand, is probably the most social of the main team, barring maybe Max. When she's not out on missions, she's a regular in her local queer community, especially the lesbian bars, and she's got at least a few amicable exes in that community and amongst her law school cohort. She's a gregarious, friendly sort of person, and the sort that tends to adopt any young queer people in her vicinity, so aboard the team's ship she's definitely something of a Cool Queer Aunt.

Speaking of Max, I'm not sure transfem is the term ey'd personally use, but ey're definitely the cast member with the most fem elements to their particular flavour of nonbinary. Gender presentation is something fun to em, and ey're pulling from a bunch of different directions when it comes to eir personal style.

As for the rest of the cast, we're still building out from our main ten, but the intention is absolutely to include trans women and transfem folks, both human and robot. Now's probably the point to admit that our jokey working title for the comic is 'Butches In Space', because it is a bit of a self-indulgent exercise in including all the butch and transmasc and agender characters that we almost never get to see (and especially don't get to see interacting with each other). Ultimately you've got to do what appeals to you, personally, with a project, but that doesn't mean that we're not going to make sure that the rest of the world of RSBS is suitably full of all different kinds of folks. Obviously it's really important to include transfem folks in a story that's using a lot of transphobia metaphors, since they're unfortunately one of the groups that's targeted the most. There's a lot of significant secondary characters that we've still only got rough sketches of roles for, like assorted family members and other agents and various folks relevant to different cases, and I'm sure a bunch of them will and up being transfem once we get to know them better. We're planning on having a lot of fun with gender stuff amongst both the humans and the robots.

Also, one last fun note about Kamari and Georgie - there aren't going to be any active romance plots in the comic, it's going to be a very aro sort of story, but like I mentioned above re: Georgie's various exes that doesn't mean that the characters that aren't aro don't have relationships in their pasts. Without spoiling Kamari's deal, I will say that Pearl from SU was one of the characters that partly inspired her, so read into that what you will. And, in the course of the main story, Georgie and Kamari's dynamic when they do end up face to face might be the closest we get to writing flirting. We thought it would be fun to leave a little bit of room for shipping, if a hypothetical reader is that way inclined, even if the main story isn't going to feature any romance arcs and will be more focused on the platonic side of their dynamic. And it was something of a deliberate choice to have the only canon-compatible ship amongst the main cast be a lesbian one, since fandom is after all a bit notorious for ignoring them.

#thanks so much for the questions!!#and thanks for being patient with me taking a wee while to answer #red shift blue shift #asked and answered #personal stuff

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childabusesurvivor · 2 months

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Reviews Elsewhere - Hold on to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers

New Post has been published on https://www.childabusesurvivor.net/reviews/2024/03/20/reviews-elsewhere-hold-on-to-your-kids-why-parents-need-to-matter-more-than-peers/

Reviews Elsewhere - Hold on to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers

This wasn’t a review as much as an interview with the authors, Dr Gabor Maté and Dr Gordon Neufeld, but it is worth reading.

Parents must reclaim the central role if growing crisis among children is to end, suggests new book

Some of what they say will be familiar if you follow me here or when I talk about the workplace on my other blog. Kids who are not securely attached to parental figures are at risk. I often talk about them being vulnerable to grooming, but they are also vulnerable to mental health issues and a lack of maturity. For example:

“Maturation happens in the context of strong attached relationships with nurturing adults, who promote independence by inviting dependence. Children can develop independence when they have a strong sense of self.”

You may have seen me writing about the sense of self around here a few times. As an abused child, that was the one thing I lacked that held me back as an adult more than anything else. I was adrift in creating an adult life without a sense of self. I could only base my decisions on what others told me to do. I was vulnerable to many influences, not all of whom had my best interests in mind. Others meant well but didn’t know me well enough to know what would work and what wouldn’t, but very few people taught me my place in the larger world – my sense of self. I had to go to therapy to get an understanding of that, and then I had to do a lot of maturing to get it.

Without involved adults, kids don’t see an example of someone with a sense of self because their peers aren’t mature enough to have a healthy sense of self. Thus, we have kids who are very active in activities with their peers, including many activities that are good for them but without a solid tether to security.

This may seem to contradict some recent research that pointed out the mental health impacts of kids not having free time with peers to explore without parents looking over their shoulders, but I think it’s related. Kids need that free play time. It helps them develop social skills and experiment with finding their sense of self in their community. However, that also requires having a solid foundation from adult relationships to allow for experimentation versus dependence on peer relationships for their sense of self.

Parents, don’t walk away feeling like this is your fault. They also point out that society plays a vital role in explaining why this has gotten worse:

“From an early age, for economic and social reasons, children don’t see their parents most of the day.”

Yes, if both parents work, and not many families can afford not to, children grow up without their presence. As work demands more and more of our time and attention, kids get less. As work demands that we move closer to fast-growing corporate areas of the country, kids spend less time with grandparents, aunts, and uncles. They spend more time in daycare and after-school care, with larger and larger staff-to-child ratios and no real connection to adults.

This is one of the many reasons I am a proponent of flexible and remote work. Kids need adults who have time for them. That includes parents and other adults who can be involved in the community as volunteers, coaches, etc. When you work 50-60 hours per week and another 7-10 commuting, let alone traveling as part of your job, it’s impossible to be involved in the community.

I think parents are now at a disadvantage when it comes to spending the time necessary to connect with their kids. For single parents, this all gets harder to do. This leads to many of the other issues, including kids being online, as the authors also mentioned. However, again, I don’t think it’s as simple as internet = bad for kids. I think social media and the internet mirror what we see in real life. Kids are online without any adult involvement. Instead of watching TikTok together and learning about how to be online from parents and adults, they are learning from each other and terrible adults.

I’ll repeat what I’ve said many times. Kids are often vulnerable because they have no close adults to trust and lean on for support. No one is there modeling what a mature sense of self is, so they aren’t learning it. I don’t necessarily agree with everything Drs. Maté and Neufeld said in this interview that I’m sure I wouldn’t agree with everything in their book, but on this point, I agree. Kids need trusted adults who make them feel safe and loved.

Yet we keep creating a society that makes it harder to provide that for kids. We are paying a price for that.

#Book, #Connection, #Grooming, #MentalHealth, #Parents, #Reviews, #School, #SocialMedia, #Support, #Therapy, #TikTok, #Writing

#Book #Connection #Grooming #Mental Health #Parents #Reviews #School #Social Media #Support #Therapy #TikTok #Writing

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metaphysicalpistolsoraclemine · 10 months

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Multidimensional Communication

On earth we exist in a blended reality system that is enduring bifurcation. The progressive disentanglement of two main organizational templates in the earth body, has manifested a blended reality system that is competing between artificial intelligence timelines and organic creator code timelines. The artificial machined layers are running metatronic coding designed to fully mutate the original human DNA into genetically engineered AI blended bodies. The artificial machined layers are fully inorganic to humanity, are technologically based and stacked in a phantom matrix which is projected out into false holograms by an artificial core manifestation template, or Artificial Tree of Life.

Therefore, when multidimensional awareness is activated into subtle energy field perceptions, it then becomes critical to comprehend how to discern the difference between these forces – artificial impostors and organic creator code source. What is the source field of these mental reality pictures or multidimensional communications, and how do they make your body feel?

Activated individuals using remote viewing or multidimensional communication will be required to reach spiritual adulthood quickly, by developing the emotional maturity to seek truth in these matters or suffer the consequences of succumbing to Archontic based deceptions. There are consequences from engaging in multidimensional communication with AI driven entities and their sophisticated mental holograms that are used as consciousness traps, as many traps use astral glamour to generate egoic programs of spiritual ambition and hero-savior-messiah complexes to continue to loop and perpetuate the victim-victimizer software. The consequence of AI entanglements instigates a lack of energetic coherence which increases mental fracturing, emotional fragility and a lack of empathy, as AI nano encoded downloads will substantially weaken the mental body and lightbody functions into a downward spiral of erupting chaotic forces and erratic behaviors. What is imperative is to focus upon building energetic coherence through heart-based centering, and strengthening personal balance within multidimensional orientation, in order to hold a strong neutral still point. Harmonizing the inner and outer energies that you are being exposed to through maintaining strong observer consciousness, especially during energy sessions and multidimensional communication. Otherwise stated, this is the ability to hold inner peace and calm no matter what you perceive, while in the midst of external forces erupting into utter chaos.

The lack of understanding and mental confusion about the nature of the reality and the war over consciousness on earth is what blocks awakening individuals from perceiving the larger truth in the matter. When we gain a larger awareness of the macrocosmic view, this allows a vantage point by which to connect more of the dots into a cohesive whole, that makes sense to a clear and sane mind. The more perceptual awareness we gain through integrative spiritual embodiment of our higher consciousness bodies, the more energetic coherence we also gain to perceive the macrocosmic picture of what is really happening on the earth. When we perceive the macrocosmic picture, it includes the war over consciousness, and then when we encounter strange energetic phenomena, we are equipped to discern more easily what is based in artificial intelligence, imposters or organic creator code. Sometimes it contains a mixture of all of it, which will help with finding stronger discernment of the content in the message.

The war over consciousness on earth uses sophisticated artificial intelligence and alien machinery for mind control and perceptual interference for the purpose of psychological and spiritual warfare, to subjugate the population of earth to submit to consciousness slavery. Thus, the ability to discern false information being used in deceptive narratives, enforced by the imposters to manipulate and control perception, requires the individual clearly understand the motivations behind those committing military grade psycho-spiritual warfare. With this deeper knowledge, along with the cultivated ability to access energetic coherence through the synthesis of the higher heart-brain, gives rise to receiving more authentic information from the living crystal heart of the truth spirit. Our inner spirit communicates from our heart complex with much higher accuracy, to give us a proper assessment of the downloaded information or the current energetic conditions we find ourselves in. Gaining knowledge about the macrocosm protects and strengthens us as we have access to information that allows us to make more informed decisions about where we place our intent, consent and authority.

When we do not understand the mechanics behind multidimensional communication and perceptual awareness of the energetics in the environment as a natural process of bio-spiritual ascension, then it is extremely difficult for the individual to be able to decipher and discern the source of the energy contact through which these higher sensory functions actually emerge. This vulnerability is exploited aggressively by the Controlling forces and dark entities who employ every level of psychological warfare and sophisticated false flag manipulation tactics, through mental holograms that target awakening individuals to mind control and manipulate their perceptions into falsehoods or twisted half-truths.

Reading Energy Fields

The multidimensional language of light, sound and symbols are the carriers through which interdimensional communication can take place, between any kind of living consciousness entity and energetic structure that exits across dimension and beyond time. It is important to understand that this is how multidimensional communication is transmitted and exchanged throughout the layers of energy fields, such as when communicating with interdimensional entities or reading intelligent information that is contained within timelines. Interdimensional entities that are benevolent, hostile and neutral all use this same form of multidimensional communication, the language of light and sound. The NAA have fused the native language of humanity with artificial intelligence technology in order to clone, replicate and mimic human biology and the human soul-spirit anatomy on multiple artificial planes, in which they exert control over this language to interfere with perceptual awareness.

Thus, the dark entities abuse this method of false light cloning of DNA signals with assorted electromagnetic technology, as a method of directing artificial machinery for the purpose of psycho-spiritual warfare. These are the silent weapons used in a quiet war to target awakening humans in order to keep them confused, fearful, distracted from the truth and believing in the controlled narrative. Assorted nanotechnology, vaccinations and chemical sprays combined with electromagnetic consciousness sweeps are used to suppress consciousness levels, by targeting demographic areas of the earth in which swaths of people are known to be awakening. Many that activate their innate abilities are told that they have mental illness and require pharmaceuticals, in order to turn off the genetic switches that enable the DNA’s natural function of reading and sensing energies in the environment.

This higher sensory skill set is generally automatic and even pre-loaded for those individuals that are natural intuitive empaths, as they have retained more of their energy receivers and transmitters within their lightbody, that allow them to more easily sense and read an assortment of energy fields. Millennials and younger children that have not undergone puberty, tend to retain their empathic skillsets until they are over vaccinated or indoctrinated to forget while in the educational system or working environments. Telempathic children have been used in the black military operations for nearly 80 years as psychic intuitives to gather intelligent information for carrying out an array of secret projects. Thus, this higher sensory ability is well known to be naturally occurring in human beings and is purposely hidden and vilified in the mainstream by the Controllers to prevent mainstream knowledge of the fact. The public has been brainwashed through extensive gaslighting tactics and fear, to deny their own consciousness experiences, while also denying the validity of other human being’s perceptions when activated to read energy fields. All of these higher sensory experiences are classified in the 3D narrative under unapproved topics and they attempt to punish those who openly talk about it. Since the NAA invasion, humanity has been mind controlled and socially engineered to delegate power to an outside authority of control, which intentionally withholds knowledge of multidimensional anatomy in order to enforce blind obedience and hijack this natural ability, which is a full attack made against personal self-sovereignty.

As individuals awaken their spiritual bodies, more of these natural abilities to read multidimensional energy fields and sense entities and their structures becomes available. It is further developed through cultivating the observer point and directing single minded focus through the higher mental bodies that are inherent in the mental matrices that are comprised in the spiritual body layers. As an individual intends to develop their consciousness and spiritual bodies, along with their unique DNA signature, it is possible to experience consciousness transport activities that include remote viewing and sensing a variety of energy phenomena that co-exist in the many different layers of dimensional fields. This can include an array of various entities of human or nonhuman origin and their energy structures, as well as machinery, implants, architecture, and entire realities which can be sensed as artificial or organic to this creation. The potentials of what can be sensed and explored energetically in the dimensional fields are indeed limitless. The caveat is that the mind must be incredibly strong and stable, fearless and anchored in the truth spirit, in order to withstand the immense pressure of knowing truth. What we fear controls us.

The intention, skill and accuracy through which an awakened individual can activate the natural ability to ‘read the field’ is relative to the removal of fears, the full dedication to Service to Others, and placing total single-minded mental concentration to discipline and transcend the dysfunctions of the negative ego mind. While sensing the field, to regain discernment and increase accuracy of sourcing a variety of phenomena, it becomes critical to understand the war over timelines, and to be able to identify artificial technology projections of mental holograms, versus authentic communication with organic creator code and organic consciousness sourcing from the truth spirits. The information is still filtered at the consciousness level the individual embodies; however, the source will be much more pristine and spiritually healthy, as truth spirits always advocate for full consciousness freedom and support personal sovereignty for every individual.

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