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pocoyo-yo · 1 year

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'𝐈 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐂𝐫𝐲, 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐈 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐈𝐭'

SUMMARY: you guys heard me loud and clear so here's part two of '8ft blue dilf fucks you like he's young again'

WARNINGS: smut, size kink, avatar/na'vi!jake, dilf!jake, fem!bodied reader, omaticaya!reader, creampie, unprotected, breeding kink, praise, degradtion, manhandling, overstimulation, whole makeout session, mating press (pos.), missionary (pos.), pet names (baby, whore just a lil bit, ...babygirl)

PART ONE

your mind was nothing but fog at this point— you could hear your own heartbeat due to almost every other sound being muted.

your blurred eyes stared at the now slightly open entrance to the hut— jake had covered it after who knows how long.

you could see, just barely see, shadows of other na'vi scurrying quickly past the hut. you knew they heard you two— but your brain was too fucked out to care. it's not like jake gave a damn either— who was bold enough to tell the olo'eykan to keep it down when it came to pleasuring his mate?

"s'too much— s'too much, ma jake.."

you left a soft kiss on his arm— that was wrapped around you. the mucles flexed as he held you close him— you back pressed firmly against his chest.

"you pass out— then we're done," he grunted, hips snapping into your ass while he cock continued to numb your velvety walls. ".. just let me fuck my girl to sleep and I'll stop."

"the k— kids," you reminded him, mind only focused on his cock but your motherly ways still found a way to stay a float through it all. ".. what if—"

"— shh.. I'm giving you another one right now— the hell," jake groaned in fustration at the feeling of his cock slipping out of your folds. his grip on you loosened and you gasped as he laid you on your back— his body now nestled in between your open thighs. ".. what is this— the third time?"

you whimpered, "ma jake.."

he rubbed the tip of his cock over your cunt— it was glistening with your wetness and his cum. even as you laid before him— just a few seconds without his cock stuffing your hold dribbles of his cum from previous rounds rolled down your ass on onto the mat where you both slept.

"don't look at me like that," jake clicked his tongue at the sight of your puffy eyes that were filled with another round of tears, and your swollen lips that were stuck in a pout. "you tryin to make me feel bad? you asked for this— been doing so good too— takin' this dick with a smile. what happened, babygirl?"

he pushed himself back inside of you with ease and you whined— your mouth forming an 'o' shape.

"I dunno," you sniffled, legs shaking as the heat and pressure in between your thighs grew unbearable. "I dunno just please— please move.."

"now you want me to move? after making that sad face— what are you? an actor now," jake thrusted into you quickly— cock drilling into your gaping pussy like he hadn't been doing this for hours already. ".. I saw the way your hole was grasping at straws when I wasn't inside of you— so desperate for a good dickin' down.."

jake gripped your thighs and let your legs rest on his shoulders— almost folding you in half to reach even deeper (like it was possible at that point).

"ma j— jake," you sobbed— eyes hooded as you stared at his wet abdomen. it continously slammed into your sensitive clit— giving it the attention it was craving. ".. s'deep— you are so deep.."

"..fuck— give me one more," he bit down on his bottom lip— eyes only focused on your expression. "cum one more time f'me.. just one more and black out— then I'm done, yeah?"

you traced your finger tips down jakes chest while his brows furrowed. his tongue swiped over his lips— sweat dripped off of the tip of his flat nose.

his hips rolled against your skin— thigh muscles sore from all the positions he had you in. your golden eyes flickered back in your head— soft, broken moans floating from your throat as his cock fucked into that gummy spot in your walls.

".. r— right there!" you begged, nails sinking into his skin with a hiss.

"damn," he hissed, the fat tip slamming harder into your g-spot. "right there, baby?"

"yes.. yes.. oh great mother," you shivered as jakes rough hand traced over your belly— stopping to feel the slight buldge in your skin when he hit that certain spot. "please— ma jake, kiss me please.."

"kiss you," he scoffed. "what whore gets a kiss? fuck— well, the kinda kiss you're thinkin' of.."

you felt tears fall down your cheeks and you pouted, "but.."

he frowned and his hand left your stomach, now gripping your jaw, "but?"

"tsaheylu," you reminded him with a whimper. "we committed tsaheylu.."

jake glanced at your connected queue's before he looked back at you— your body jolting upward slightly with each snap of his hips. a long, shakey sigh left his lips as your deep emotions for a kiss coursed throughout every neuron in his brain.

"you want it that bad, huh?" he chuckled.

you nodded with a sniffles, "yes.. kiss me please.."

jake pressed his forehead against yours before his lips found your own. you clawed at his chest— moaning desperately into jakes mouth. his tongue swipped over your lips before venturing into your mouth, meeting your own. the kiss was so tender— after each drawback for a short breath of air jake kissed the corners of your mouth before diving back in. he was sort of shocked he went that long without genuinely kissing you— he didn't want to separate, only doing so, so that you could breathe.

"you're so pretty, baby," he mumbled, breathing harshly through his nose. "so damn perfect.."

you asked to be used— to be treated as a play-thing and you both were enjoying the hell out of it, shit— jake was still fucking you like a slut while kissing you like he hadn't kissed you in years, but he could only go so long without a bit of praise for you.

I mean, back when you both were young, he wasn't an asshole when you two had sex— just very, very rough.

"ma jake.. fuck— jake.." you hiccuped on whines, pulling back for air.

"you're already doing that, pretty thing." jake teased— hooded eyes only staring at your wet lips.

tears clung to your lashes as you murmured, "you— you are pretty.. ma jake, you are so pretty.."

"don't steal my compliments," he rolled his eyes before he kissed your jaw. "also I'm not pretty— I fucked you that dumb..?"

he pulled back, hovering over you while you tried form a sentence, honestly, just anything slightly coherent.

"you are pretty," you repeated— hands shakily grazing jakes stomach. you traced your thumb over his two beauty marks and glanced up at him. "these are pretty.."

jake clicked his tongue, "don't say shit like that," he snuck his hand in betwen your thigh and rubbed dramatic circles on your clit with his thumb. "and give me that look.."

you gasped, your tongue on the verge of loling out of your mouth. jake's deep blue cheeks were flushed darker— a slight gulp leaving him as your deadly doe eyes grew wide.

"I can feel you clampin' down on me, babygirl," he groaned— cock twitching in the warmth and tightness of your walls. "fuck— you're tight.. you gonna cum?"

his dick poked at your belly more and more, and it was a sight. you knew he was deep but actually seeing the tip of his cock make your belly buldge made you somewhat embarassed.

"jake— 'can't do it!" you cried out.

"answer the question.." he grunted.

your toes curled— your dazed gaze meeting jakes as the knot in your stomach grew painfully tight. your breaths were uneven and your ears perked up at the lewd nouses that came from below— each wet slap and airy thrust.

you whimpered, "y— yes! m'gonna cum— yes!"

jakes let his hand slide to your belly, and he lifted his hips, heavy balls now slapping against your clit everytime he sunk back inside you.

"give me one more, babygirl," he rested his forehead against yours once again as he pressed down on your stomach (the spot where he would hit). "and I'll.. give you one more.."

your thighs pressed against your breasts and that did it for you. the pressure was too much to the point where you couldn't speak— cumming was all you could think about.

a broken sob escaped your throat— your entire body shook (legs shaking the most), the intensity of your orgasm made your eyes roll back in your head.

jake moaned, "holy fuck, baby—"

you creamed around his cock and jake could only get a few more thrusts in before your overstimulation became too much for him to handle. his jaw hung agape while a mixture of curse words and whimpers filled the air.

you panted heavily while his cum stuffed you full for the however many time.

you whined as jake lifted himself up and let your weak legs fall to his sides. he held your hand and kissed each of your knuckles gently.

"I'm right here," he huffed. "..fuck, you did so good, babygirl— I love you so much," jake could see you were barely clinging onto consiousness and he chuckled, "I'll clean you up— rest for me.."

you shivered as he pulled out his softened cock and separated your queues, giving your forehead a gentle kiss before your heavy eyelids fluttered shut.

"and there she goes.." he sighed.

jake resisted the urge to just collaspe beside you and take you in his arms— the kids would be returning home soon (it was almost Eclipse).

he wiped you down the best he could and tried not to wake you while he dressed you up again. he put your loincloth on first— not wanting all his hardwork to just spill out like that. he then threw a thin blanket over you— even though na'vi didn't use them he didn't want the kids seeing you covered in his kiss marks and bruises until they faded a little.

jake then fixed himself up, jumping a bit as three rowdy kids (not even in double digits) stormed into the hut like they owned the place. all of them calling for you— of course.

"mama guess what!"

"mama I didn't do it—"

"mama m'hungry!"

"shh," jake placed his finger over his lips and nodded towards your sleeping frame. "mama's asleep.. she's— she's not feeling well, so," he stroked his daughters bangs and suggested in a soft tone. "how about you go eat dinner with grandma and stay for a little bit. tell her daddy sent you, alright..?"

the three children blinked slowly before they gave jake a quick nod and left just as quickly as they busted in.

"it's fine.." jake sighed and laid down next to you, pulling you in close.

your head rested against his chest as he stroked your hair while he stared up at the ceiling with hooded eyes.

"..four will be fine."

- so I just hit 500+ followers.. wtf you guys??? like ion even know what to say— thank you so much!! think of this as a potential 500 follower special since I usually disappear off of the face of the planet for like three weeks -

#avatar #avatar twow #avatar smut #avatar x you #dilf jake sully #jake sully smut #jake sully #smut #rest in peace to all the soldiers who died in the service i dive in her cervix #jake sully x reader #jake sully x you #papa jake #avatar movie #tysm for 500 followers

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lskisms · 1 year

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YOU, AT LEAST, WERE BUILT TO GO, J. MILLER

. . . which is why you are able to be loved

synopsis — joel is getting older, he is getting frail, and you, still in your youth, have to come to terms with it. you just have to do so much sooner than you thought when he’s hurt during your attempt to escape the university of eastern colorado.

genres &&. warnings — angst, hurt/comfort, (post) apocalypse &&. canon compliant, spoilers for ep. 6 “kin” and ep. 7 “left behind,” contemplation of death, canon-typical violence (wound, gore, blood, wound care), age-gap (reader is in their mid-late 20s).

word count — 3.2k

note from r — title comes from the poem “elegy for my innocence” by steven dunn. i suppose i need to introduce myself a little: i’m rhi, i’m 22, and i’m in my second to last semester of college where i’m majoring in english. obvi, a big fan of the last of us, but also resident evil (which is what i’ve based my account aesthetic on, courtesy of my beloved leon s. kennedy). my ask box is open for people who want to send in asks and things. i’m really looking forward to writing for my fellow joel miller lovers.

if your parents were still alive, if they were around to see the life you’ve carved for yourself over the last few months, you’re certain your dad would want to smack the shit out of you and your mother would disown you from the family faster than you could blink.

you can hear the chastising now: a man old enough to be your father? are you joking? what the fuck is wrong with you? this is not what we meant when we told you we wanted you to start a family.

and you can’t fault them really. you are almost twenty years his senior, having been just a young child when the cordyceps outbreak decimated the world. if the world had stayed normal, if none of this had ever happened, you’d probably have a dead end corporate job that has you wanting to drop off the face of the earth at the end of every grueling day, married and going home to a man complacent and yielding in every aspect, never too sure of himself to assert any kind of dominance, stuck in his own dead end job that keeps you comfortable just enough.

but the world isn’t normal and it hasn’t been since 2003. and there’s nothing you can do about it. you feel like a child again, wholly the depiction of the angsty teen in dramas and romcoms, as you tell the ghosts of your parents that the heart wants what it wants and i can’t help that i fell in love with a man going starlight gray at his temples. it is wholly melodramatic, something that you would have seen in any number of teen dramas written by out-of-touch, old white men.

joel miller came into your life like a lone crimson leaf during the fall, sometime during your first few months at the boston quarantine zone. it wasn’t like he’d meant to because everything that man did and does is deliberate; he’d simply waltzed across your line of vision as you’d walked back to your apartment after a long day of doing menial chores, the new world equivalent of that mental-health-issue inducing corporate job that the older people of the zone talked about.

you’d heard of him, of course: joel miller, flown in from somewhere down south, a menace to anyone who crossed his path prior to his arrival in boston, a brother somewhere out in the midwest who had taken off and joined the fireflies. he was decidedly unapproachable, gruff and mean and stubborn. most people were more scared of him than they were of fedra for the simple fact that he was more deadly with his two bare hands than any fedra idiot (sorry, “soldier”) with a gun.

he wasn’t a person who you intended to mess around with, no matter how handsome you’d thought he was when you saw him that first time. but then you’d started hanging around with tess, one of very few people who had any kind of stable-enough connection with him and that had led to you meeting and hanging around with him too. tess invited you to go on runs with them, sneaking out of the zone at night to stretch your legs and look for supplies that fedra definitely had and refused to give up. she’d preached your capabilities to joel and, stubborn as he was, he’d allowed you to keep coming with them after the first time because you proved to be spry enough for things that he and tess had grown a little too old for: you were useful to him and that filled you with a kind of thrilling gratification.

by the time marlene had tasked your little trio with getting ellie out of the city, you were a year deep into your entanglement with joel where you did all the recreational talking and he was the one who made the deals with the fireflies, the fedra goons he had in his pocket, the people who had things to trade. it was a balance that worked well for you: joel was well-versed in persuasion when he wanted to be and you were seemingly the only person who could draw out the rare ghost of a smile or a laugh from him.

it was supposed to be a quick job, one that joel had insisted you sit out but you’d refused. just a quick round trip tpe thing, that’s what you’d said to him. we’ll be out and back before anybody even realizes we’re gone.

that had gone belly-up, of course, because anything that involved the fireflies had at least a 99% chance of not turning out the way anyone planned. and when you’d left the museum, you were down a friend and up a whole ton of miles. joel had tried to convince you again to leave, but once more you’d refused. tess died for us, joel. i’m in this until the end because i’m making sure her sacrifice wasn’t for nothing.

and he’d let you stay. even months after that discussion, you think that he must feel at least a tiny bit grateful that you’d argued with him over it, that you’d fought to tag along. you’re an extra set of eyes, of hands, someone capable of taking over when he needs a break, which is hardly ever because he’s still as ornery as always, but knowing that there’s someone there who can must be nice enough.

and you’re glad he’d given in for once in his life because he’s dying beneath your hands and you’re not sure what to do. he’s going sallow and gray on the concrete floor of this ransacked house, breathing raspy and eyes slipping between you and some far-off point above him. joel is dying and for the first time ever since entering his life, you’re useless.

“joel, stay awake, please,” you beg, clutching at his hand as you kneel beside him. “ellie, you have to stop the bleeding.”

“i’m trying,” the young girl snaps. when she looks up, all you see is a girl who is reliving a loss, a deer caught in headlights, frenzied and terrified. her hands press the cloth harder over joel’s stomach in an attempt to staunch the blood flow and the man groans.

“leave,” he mumbles and your head snaps to look at him. he cannot possibly be saying this right now, not after everything you’ve been through. “leave. head north, go back to jackson. find tommy.”

“like hell we will,” you reply, trying to channel as much of his stubbornness as you can. you’d rather give up and drop dead right now than leave him to die alone in some fucking house in colorado. “we’re gonna fix this, joel. we’re not leaving, i’m not leaving.”

he’s slipping again, eyes glazing over. you can tell he wants to fight with you, but he’s losing the energy for it. for any of it. ellie stills and then tosses his jacket over him in a bid to keep him warm. she fixes you with a look, his look that says stay with him, so you nod solemnly, brushing his hair back from his forehead. you hear her footsteps on the stairs and only when the door shuts behind her do you finally let yourself break, weeping openly over joel’s chest, rising and falling so, so shallowly.

falling in love with this man has been something beautiful, some kind of phoenix rising from the ashes of a long-dead world. over the last few months, you have come to learn the feel of his knuckles brushing against yours, the warmth of his chest against your back when you share a sleeping bag, the sound of his soft breaths as you’ve trekked through miles upon miles of woods and abandoned highways. you have come to appreciate those things, facets of him that only you are privy to, the only person to know the weight of his arm over your waist and feel of his breath against your shoulder.

but in doing so, in reveling in the knowledge that you are the sole person to experience these hidden away pieces of joel miller, you’ve forgotten just how much older he is than you are. that misty gray at his temples and in his beard have been so permanent, you’ve started to believe that he’s always looked like this, that it’s not a marker of his age. you’ve forgotten that he is older and growing frailer by the day, conveniently forgotten how his heart stutters and how his knees act up after hours and miles of walking.

you had always known, of course, that joel would eventually leave you, but not this soon. and not like this.

maybe it’s your fault for putting him on a pedestal: the great, unstoppable joel miller. in your mind, he’s untouchable, some formidable opponent who people fear because he’s strong and knows his way around a fight. it shouldn’t be a chunk of a broken baseball bat that ends his life because it’s not fair, none of this is fair. you’ve been a fool for thinking that the three of you, your unlikely little family, would make it out of this unscathed, for believing that you could live a life like bill and frank’s after this all was over: fulfilling, safe, and the closest resemblance of before.

“god,” you whimper out, still brushing your fingers through his salt and pepper hair. “how could you even consider telling us to leave you here, joel?”

he gazes up at you, blinks slowly, the smallest signs of life that tell you he’s listening and wanting to fight you back about it.

“y’can’t leave me alone here, old man.” a short, wet laugh. “we’ve got so much left to do. i can’t get ellie back to jackson without you. i can’t do anything without you.”

he shakes his head in response and narrows those dark eyes of his just a bit. you read it for what it is: don’t you start talkin’ about yourself like that. he’s always been hard on you for not believing in yourself and your abilities, and it makes you laugh again.

“i mean really, joel. first man i’ve ever loved and you’re telling me to leave you here to die alone in fucking colorado.” you shake your head, looking away to try to blink back tears. “i can’t- i can’t just go. i need you alive.”

you can’t even stop yourself from babbling through the tears, brushing his hair back and wiping away his own tears. even though you should be desensitized to death and loss, you’ve always been particularly sensitive. but you’re young and this is your first love, your only shot at it, and he’s bleeding out on a cold floor because you were too focused on everything else that you hadn’t been able to stop him from getting hurt.

“ain’t your fault,” joel rasps out, eyes shining in the dull winter light. you realize you voiced that, a placing of responsibility that you’d meant for yourself and yourself only. “don’t do that.”

you stare at him and you know what’s going through that head of his. all kinds of thoughts that he wants to voice out loud: it’s not your fault and you were doing the best you could in the situation and this was going to happen sooner or later. damn pessimistic realist, always focusing on the worst possible outcomes than entertaining any kind of optimism.

and in a twisted turn of events, you start to think of your parents, long gone and relegated solely to memory, buried somewhere between atlanta and boston: an optimistic dad and an overwhelmingly realistic mother, so far on opposite ends of a spectrum that they complemented each other perfectly. your dad, ever the poet, had stolen poetry collections from every bookstore he’d came across during your treks from settlement to settlement. his favorite poem, by far, was about the death of a person’s innocence, something always meant to die eventually, perpetually blushing and always coming back a little less pristine each time.

you remember it now as you’re holding joel’s hand with your own, pressing his knuckles against the soft plush of your cheek. you, at least, were built to go, you hear your father’s voice say in your head, which is why you are able to be loved. you haven’t thought about this poem in years, not since you lost him to a runner somewhere in south carolina, but it feels sickening that you’re recalling it now as you’re watching your first and only love die under your hands.

and yet, somehow, it feels comforting, the idea that to be human is to know that one day, a loved one will die, but to know that is to cherish them better, to love them harder. you’re not at all okay with joel dying because you’ve had so little time to love him, but it helps you to cherish those few late nights more, to revel in the memory of his warmth enveloping you on particularly cold nights.

you can let me go. joel’s dark eyes are going glossy again and you smile knowingly at him, still crying. he’s not dead yet and there’s a possibility that he’ll make it out of this alive, the outcome that you’re praying to every god that has ever existed for. you can let me go; it won’t be easy, but you can do it.

ellie’s feet as loud on the old wood stairs as she comes barreling through the door and down the stairwell. she looks rabid as she all but throws herself onto the floor beside joel, ripping the tan coat back and pulling the soaked cloth away. joel’s wound is still gushing blood, a sure sign that he’s well on his way to death, but when ellie makes eye contact with you, you know for sure she’s found something to help. she holds up a needle and spool of thread; she must have torn the entire house apart looking for her hail mary and she found it, she fucking found it. she stares at you, eyes wide and face red, breathing hard, waiting for your go ahead.

when you finally nod at her, fresh tears in your eyes, you look down at joel. his fingers curl around your palm tighter and he’s staring back, his eyes wide. you laugh tearfully, totally and entirely stunned that ellie had actually found a way to help.

“you’re gonna be okay,” you weep, pressing his hand to your forehead, letting your tears drip into your lap. “you’re gonna be okay, joel. just hang on.”

the next few minutes crawl by cruelly, joel surely leaving bruises on your hand from gripping yours too hard, too tight, but you can’t even care because when his hand finally goes slack, ellie is done. her handiwork isn’t so bad and the bleeding has stopped for the most part. when you sigh, it feels like the weight of the world leaves your shoulders, a degree of relief you’ve never felt in your life.

joel, stubborn as always, is fighting unconsciousness as you turn to look back at him and you know it’s because he knows he’s not entirely out of the woods yet. there’s still bleeding to stop, a potential infection to fight, medicine you need to find to keep him safe and healthy, but this has to be good enough for now. it has to be because he’s joel miller and he’s mucked it through gunshot wounds and temporary deafness and all kinds of other shit the world has thrown at him.

ellie, clearly emotionally gone, stands, her dark eyes empty and her face void of everything save for exhaustion. without even looking at you, she turns towards the stairs and says to nobody, “going for a walk. i need a break.”

her footsteps echo in the stairwell and then creak overhead before she disappears out the front door, leaving you in an empty house with joel and the horse in the garage. you look back to joel, still holding his hand. his face, always so devoid of anything minus annoyance and anger, looks so relieved right now and it makes you want to cry again, but you’re shit out of saline. you lay his hand down beside him before you tuck his winter coat back over him, up to the chin.

there’s not much that you can say, no thoughts come to mind. nothing more than i love you, but you want to save those for when he’s safely out of the thick of this. as true as they are, it’s not the right time, but you’re sure he knows. he must when he scoots his hand out from under the coat and nudges it against your thigh, some gesture that you can’t decode, but that you understand as i’m still here, like he’s able to read your mind. you smile at him softly.

i’ll tell him when this is all over, you reason with yourself as you move to lay beside him, exhaustion finally overtaking you. wherever we end up after ellie is safe with the fireflies, i’ll tell him and he’ll say it back and we’ll be okay.

he can’t turn onto his side, but he turns his head to face you, looking every bit the age of fifty. his eyes are tired and the crinkles of his skin run deep, his cheeks and chin dusted gray. this close, you can see every pock mark, the dip of skin at his temple from some long-forgotten cut, the deep scar that mars the space between his eyebrows. his defenses are down and he looks his age, for the first time in a long time because it’s so easy to forget how old he is when he’s doing the things he does to protect you and ellie.

you scoot in as far as you’ll allow yourself, knees knocking against his legs and your head pillowed on the arm underneath you. you raise a hand and rest it on his cheek, a touch he immediately leans into, like your palm was made to caress his skin. as far as you care, it was. he tilts his head towards you and you find yourself doing the same, foreheads touching. this is one of the small gestures joel allows you on most days, but right now, it feels more monumental than that. like always, it’s a moment shared singularly between the two of you, but it carries so much more weight because he gazes at you with so much more softness and love than he’s ever let himself show before and it reminds you that underneath all that rough exterior, he is a man capable of gentle touches and adoration, no matter how many times the world and himself have tried to beat it out of him.

as his breathing slows, but deepens (a sure sign that ellie has mended the problem for now), you move your arm to rest on his torso, hand pressed into the sturdy spot just above his heart. the beat is steady, solid, a reminder that he’s okay. he was built to go, but now more than ever, you feel he was also built to be yours, to be loved by you. and you’ll make sure he makes it through this, no matter the cost.

(c) lskisms, 2023. do not repost, translate, or otherwise plagiarize my work. the only official versions of my work are available on tumblr and ao3 under the name lskisms.

#joel miller x reader #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfic #pedro pascal fic #tlou x reader #.lskisms #.joel #.tlou

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anxietysslave · 8 months

Note

Can I request dangerous fellows with fem!R!reader

R is from warm bodies

R has a romantic, withdrawn personality. He imagines the world as it once was, and likes to picture the lives his fellow Dead once lived. His thoughts are deep and ironic, but because he is Dead, he has trouble expressing himself. He wants to be more than a simple-minded zombie, but only manages to fulfill his desire when he meets Julie, a strong and witty living girl. He quickly becomes protective of her. His feelings eventually transform into love.

Despite R's status as a zombie, he exhibits many human qualities through his behavior, and actions. R seems to have an active love for music, and is rather intelligent. He enjoys collecting vinyl music tracks because of their superior quality, which indicates he may or might have been an audiophile (someone who loves high definition sound/music). R's residence in the aircraft give many clues to his character traits. Of all, however, his kindness, caring, and protectiveness seem to be his most defining qualities as he is able to rise above his viscous tenancies as a zombie.

I took this from the wiki page

If you read this I want to say THANK YOU

I am so happy you requested this- I've watched Warm Bodies before, and I love R- He's a sweetheart- He is the best

F/N: Female Name Backstory: You were roaming the streets of the city, when you run into an... Interesting group of survivors XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX You were walking through the desolate city, once full of life.. You had no idea how you were able to even stand, let alone control your actions.. You remembered very vividly the zombie that had attacked you, and the god awful pain you had felt. Then, it felt like you were in some dream of darkness... You couldn't move, couldn't see, nothing. And out of nowhere... You awoke. To what you were now. A brain eating zombie. Although the thought of eating brains still disgusted you, and you really had no plans to try and eat brains...

Suddenly, you heard a loud crash from an old store around the corner. Could someone possibly be alive? Or could it be a zombie like you? You couldn't help yourself as you started to walk to that direction. If it was a human, how would you approach them? Wouldn't they kill you? Well... Truthfully, you didn't care. The chance of finding an alive human who could perhaps help you get out of this state was an overwhelming thought... You had to find out, and that was final.

HAILEY: As you approached the store, a young girl came running down the sidewalk and knocked you over. You groaned in pain, and as you looked down.. You saw a girl starring at you in fear. You tilted your head. "How... You alive?" Your voice sounded so raspy... It sounded like you hadn't spoken in so long. Hailey was too stunned to speak... She fell back, looking at you in shock.

"W-What?... H-How are you speaking...?" She whispered. "D-Don't know... Woke up like this..." Your language was very broken, but it was hard to form sentences. You were doing the best you could. You watched as Hailey stumbled back. "W-Why aren't you attacking me??" She inquired fearfully.

"F-Friend. Not food." You shook your head. "Brains, very disgusting." You added on. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Hey! Hailey what ar-HOLY SHIT!" Zion exclaimed. He got his weapon ready to attack you. You flinched away, expecting to be hit, but the hit never came... You slowly looked up to see Hailey was covering you.

"W-Wait! This zombie's different!" Hailey exclaimed. "What do you mean different!? They're all the same!" Zion exclaimed. "J-Just hear me out... Please.. I-I'll prove it to you, okay??" Hailey inquired. Zion sighed, but nodded. "Fine. But if you're wrong... I am killing this... Monster right here and now." Zion threatened.

Your eyebrows furrowed. "M-Monster? I-I'm monster?" Your voice cracked as you looked down. Zion's eyes filled with shock. Hailey turned towards you, and kneeled in front of you. "C-Can y-you please tell us your name?" She inquired softly. "M-My name? F-F/N..." You spoke quietly.

"See? She can speak just like us... She told me the thought of eating brains disgust her." Hailey explained as she stood up. "She could just be saying that to have a better to chance to eat your brains!" Zion exclaimed. "That's very unlikely. All zombies do not talk, nor do they get mentally hurt." Lawrence's voice rang out.

You looked over, and tilted your head. "M-More survivors?" You inquired curiously. "Yes. There's more of us." Lawrence nodded. "H-Hey! Why would you tell her that!? Now it's more food for her!" Eugene exclaimed. "How can you guys all trust this... Monster?" Scarlett interfered.

"How did you end up in this position??" Harry inquired as he kneeled in front of you. You flinched away slightly, not liking all the attention. "M-Mother... Zombie. Infected me." You struggled to speak. "Guys, come o-on.. Let's not ask her so many questions..." Hailey spoke up. She kneeled in front of you.

"It's okay... I-I'm sorry they asked you so many qu-questions..." Hailey stuttered nervously. You tilted your head. "W-Why... Care about me?" You spoke up. "Y-You were forced into this predicament.. I believe you don't want to harm any of u-us, and are just stuck like this..." She whispered.

"I-I can't even imagine what you're going through..." She added on softly. Your eyes widened in surprise as you stared at her. You found her... Very pretty. She was being so kind to you, despite what you were... She was clearly very shy, and yet, here she was defending you...

"T-Thank...You." You managed to get out. "Well... If she isn't going to eat us, she could help us get supplies. No zombies have interest in her." Sue suddenly spoke up. "Hm. You make a good point..." Lawrence mumbled. "Alright. Get up. We're heading back." Lawrence decided. "W-What!? We can't just bring a ZOMBIE with us!" Zion exclaimed. "You do not question my authority. She could be a great asset." Lawrence pointed out as he started to walk. "C-Come on. Let's go." Hailey gently grabbed your hand, and gave you a shy smile. "O-Okay..." Maybe things wouldn't be so bad for you Afterall...

ETHAN: You were walking over to the shop, when you noticed a bag of chips fall in front of you. You tilted your head, as you picked them up. You felt someone staring at you, so you looked up. Your eyes widened as you noticed a male standing before you. His eyes were wide, and he was gripping the baseball bat tight in his hands.

You held the chips out. "You... Seemed... Drop this." You spoke brokenly. He didn't say anything, staring at you in shock. "No... Harm. I mean... No harm..." You managed to get out as you continued to hold the chips out for him to grab. He continued to stare for a moment, before hesitantly grabbing the bag of chips.

"...Thanks." He thanked quietly. You looked over him, and noticed how he was having a hard time carrying all the supplies. You looked around, and noticed a bag. You gently grabbed it, and held it out for him. "Here... Help carry things." You suggested. He hesitantly grabbed that too, and put the supplies in there.

"How are you able to talk...?" He inquired softly. "Don't know. Woke up this." you admitted as you stood up. "Do you remember your name?" He inquired curiously. "Mhm. F/N." You clarified. "Well... Thanks I suppose... I have no idea how you came to be sentient, but... I suppose that's partially a good thing..." He mumbled.

You shook your head. "Not good thing. Alone." You admitted. "You're alone...?" He questioned softly. You nodded. "Mother turned me." You explained. "Don't want this. Want human again." You tried to explain. His eyes widened. "You want to be human again?" He inquired. You nodded again.

"Don't want people scared of me. Want live normally. Friends. More." You explained. He stood there for a moment, seeming to think about what he should do next... "Alright... This whole situation is new... I... Are you interested in eating brains or...?" He inquired. You shook your head as your pale face scrunched up.

"No. Nasty." You admitted. He stared at you again. "I don't know why I feel bad for you... How about we... Take you to Lawrence, and decide our next plan of action. You'll be okay." He suggested. Your eyes widened. "You... Do that for me?" You inquired curiously. He nodded. "I would. You're innocent." He explained. You couldn't help but feel happy... Did he really want to help you? Why though? It couldn't be just because you were innocent... Either way, you felt yourself swoon over him.. He was being so... Kind. "Okay." You nodded. You decided that you had nothing to lose, so you set on your journey with him to find these other survivors... Maybe you could make it out of this...

SCARLET:

You noticed a girl who was on the ground struggling to escape the grasp of another zombie. "G-Get off me! Help! Help! Please! I don't want to die!" She cried out. You felt pity for the women, and angry at this zombie... How dare this zombie try and eat her brains!? You charged at the zombie, grabbing it by the head and slamming it's head into the ground until it was nothing more but little pieces of rotten flesh, and a rotten brain. You looked over at the girl, who was staring at you fearfully and in shock.

"W-What??... Hey! You don't come closer to me!" She exclaimed as you took a step near her. You stopped. "Are... Hurt?" You inquired. Her eyes went wider. "W-What?" She stuttered nervously. "Are... You... Hurt?" You managed to get out. "N-No! What gave you that idea?!" She screeched.

You looked down at her bleeding leg, and yours eyes widened. "B-Bleeding. You bleeding!" You exclaimed. You looked around frantically before noticing a first aid kit. Your clumsy hands struggled to grab it, but once you did you rushed over to her. "Get away, freak!" She exclaimed as she pushed you away.

You looked at her in shock and hurt. "I... Wanted help you..." You whispered. "Not kill... No eat brains. Brains disgusting." You tried to explain. "I want human again... Not zombie... I don't like this..." You whispered as you looked down sadly. She was silent for a moment. "Fine... Fix up my wound. But if you try and harm me, I swear I will kill you... Got it?!" She exclaimed.

You perked up, and nodded. "Of course. I help!" You spent the next few minutes struggling to help her, but you managed to get the wound in better condition. "I do good?" You inquired. "Mmm... You could've done better. But I suppose your a bit... Brain dead." She sighed.

"Do you have a name? I'd rather call you something other than zombie... Unless you don't remember..." She grumbled. "I remember! I f/N!" You exclaimed. You seemed to be in a better mood... "Will you help get me human?? Or not alone??" You inquired. "Ugh! Try and speak better, please!? I can't understand gibberish!" She explained.

"O-Oh.. Sorry..." You apologized softly. "Can... You help me turn human? Or at.. L-Least not leave alone?" You inquired. "I don't want be here. Please." You begged softly. She looked at you. "You don't want to be alone anymore?? Or be a zombie?" She inquired in shock. You nodded. "I hate... This. Awful way life." You explained. She sighed. "Well... Since you saved me, I suppose I could help you..." She decided as she stood up. You smiled happily as you got up. You hugged her, which caused her to yelp in shock. "T-Thank... You! Thank you!" You managed to get through.

ZION: You noticed a guy struggling to run away. You pulled him into a nearby abandoned building, and covered his mouth. You winced slightly as you felt him try and kick you. "S-Sh... Other zombies.. Eat you if not quiet. Hide out." You tried to explain. He froze in shock, and ended up staying still as the brainless zombies moved past. You let him go.

"Sorry... I save you.." You apologized. "W-What the fuck!? How are you speaking right now!?" He spoke loudly. You winced at the loudness. "T-Too loud... Ears hurt." You spoke softly. He sighed. "I'm sorry... I just... I don't understand this... Why would you save me? Don't you just want my brains?" He inquired curiously.

You shook your head. "No. Brains nasty." You explained. His eyes widened. "W-Wait.. Let me get this straight. You find... Brains gross??" He inquired. "You nodded. "Thought of eating them... Makes me sick." You explained. "Well... Thank you. I suppose..." He mumbled. "I have to go meet up with the ot-" He started.

Your eyes widened, and you shook your head rapidly. "W-Wait! No leave! Please! I can't alone!" You exclaimed fearfully. "What?? I don't understand that!" He exclaimed in frustration. "Please... I can't... Be alone again!" You begged as your eyes managed to tear up... "I-I do anything you need! Just don't me alone! Please!" You begged quickly.

He stared at you for a moment. "...You know you risk my friends killing you if you come with me, right?" He inquired. You nodded rapidly. "I-I know! But... I rather die than alone!" You exclaimed. He sighed in frustration. "Why am I always the one who ends up in these weird situations..?" He grumbled to himself.

"Alright. First, tell me your name. You can't just be called zombie." He decided. "F-F/N." You explained. "Okay... Uh... I'm Zion." He introduced. "Now, how in the hell did you turn into... This?" He inquired as he looked you up at down. "Mother turned me." You whispered. "I hate zombie. I hate being monster." You added on. "Okay, I see... Uhm... Well.. I suppose I can... Let you come with me. Just on the condition that you help me find food on the way.. We're low as is." He sighed. "And don't think I won't hesitate to kill you if you fuck up! You got it??" He exclaimed. You nodded rapidly. "Yes! Understand!" You nodded quickly. "I do anything to stay with people!" You decided. "We'll need to work on your English too..." He mumbled. EUGENE: "WHAT THE HELL!?" A sudden voice boomed. You jumped, and looked over to see an orange haired male staring at you. You yelped in pain as he tossed something at you, knocking you to the ground. "O-Ow... Hurt... Why?" You whispered sadly as you looked at him. "I not monster..." She added on softly.

"No want your brains... Want to be human again.." She whispered. "What... Why the hell can you talk!? Why are you..." He continued to stare at you with wide eyes. "Shit, what do I do!?" He started to pace. "Should I kill, or.. Dammit..." He stopped to look at you. "That's it... I'll just... Kill you." He grabbed his weapon.

Your eyes went wide as you backed away. "P-Please! No! I good! I good! I get food, I get supplies, just no kill!" You begged pitifully. He stopped. "...You'll get food for us?" He inquired. You nodded rapdily. "I do it! Just... No kill.. I don't want die for good... I want out of this curse.." You whispered.

He sighed. "Fine. You go get some food from that store over there. If you can do that, I'll think about it." He decided. You looked where he was pointing, and saw a bunch of zombies crowding it. You nodded quickly as you got up. "Understood!" You rushed over there, and managed to get past all the zombies.

You felt butterflies in your undead stomach. Could this be your chance to find someone to stay with?? Not be alone anymore? You had no idea what to think... What if he still killed you?... No, you could prove it! He was hesitant to give you a chance, sure. But if you did this.. He may like you more!

You grabbed as many supplies as your undead hands could carry, before pushing through all the zombies. You got to Eugene, and held out the supplies. "Here!" You exclaimed. His eyes went wide as he saw the nice snacks and supplies you got. He hesitantly took them, looking over them. "Well.. I guess I can make an expectation..." He mumbled. "Be grateful I'm in a good mood!" He exclaimed. "Come with me. We need to get more supplies on our way back. Do good, and I'll get Lawrence to allow you to stay with us. Got it?" He offered. You nodded rapidly. "Yes! Get it! Let go!" You decided as you followed this kind man. You were so happy to finally find someone nice to you... This was a nice change.

HARRY: You approached slowly, noticing a white haired male siting outside a store. His face was clenched up in pain as he held his head. You felt worried for the man, and hesitantly walked up. "Excuse... Me." You spoke softly. His pained eyes looked up, and widened. He tried to scramble back, but all that resulted in way a yelp of pain. You put your hands up.

"N-No! I mean no harm! Don't hurt yourself!" You exclaimed in worry. "I want help! Let me know how I help!" You exclaimed. His eyes looked frantically over you, but stopped after a moment. "...You want... To help me? Am I dreaming?" He spoke softly. You shook your head. "No. Not dreaming. I'm here... I think." You admitted.

"I don't harm you. No harm to anyone." You explained. "You in pain. How can help?" You inquired. He stared at you for a moment more. "...Could you... Find me some pain medication?" He inquired. You nodded quickly. "Drug store corner. I be back! Be careful!" You exclaimed as you turned away.

You limped to the nearby pharmacy, where zombies were everywhere. You got inside, and looked frantically. You found many different pain medications, so you got them all. You left the drug store, and quickly limped back to Harry. You held the medication out. "Here. Found. Water too." You held out water after he took the bottle of pain medication.

He looked so surprised. But he didn't seem to dwell on the strangeness of this whole situation, so he quickly took some pain medication and downed the water bottle. He leaned his head back. "Scared of me?" You inquired nervously. He shook his head, which caused you to feel surprised.

You smiled softly, as you limped over to him. You gently started to massage his scalp, which caused him to look at you in shock. "S-Sorry.. Try to help." You apologized as you got ready to pull your hand away. He gently grabbed it. "No... It's okay. Please continue.." He spoke softly.

He gave you a very gentle smile, which caused you to feel butterflies. You nodded as you gently massaged his scalp. After a few minutes of silence, he looked up at you again. "Thank you Ms...?" He inquired. "I... Don't remember name." You looked down sadly. "Y-You don't?... I see..." He spoke softly.

"How about... I call you F/N?" He suggested. You seemed surprised. "I-I like that." You nodded. He gave you another soft smile. "Thank you.. For helping me. I have no idea how you can talk, but it seems like you don't know either... So thank you again." He smiled. "You have no interest in brains, do you?" He inquired. You shook your head. "No. Brains gross." You explained. "Well... That's good." He continued to look at you in awe. "You know what? Let's go meet with the others. You showed me compassion, and I want to do the same." He decided. Your eyes widened, but you felt happy. Was this your chance to be around such a kind man..? And, why did it feel like your heart was beating rapidly? Your heart was gone... Maybe.. It was because you were mistaking the feeling of love for it. Either way, you were going with him.

SUE: You didn't see anyone, so you walked into another store. You saw a pretty girl with glasses looking through the coffee section. You tilted your head, wondering what she was looking for. "Dammit.. Where did I drop it?" She mumbled to herself. You looked down and noticed a coffee container on the ground near you feet.

You gently reached down, and picked it up. "Looking this?" You spoke curiously as you held it out for her. She looked confused, as she looked at you. Her eyes widened slightly, but she didn't seme freaked out, which intrigued you. "Oh my... I never expected to run into a zombie who could speak." She admitted.

"I... Not expect to speak either. Not expect to turn zombie, or control body." You explained. She took the coffee container. "Well, I suppose that makes two of us now." She stated. "Say, what brought you over here?" She inquired. "Heard bang. Thought it humans." You explained. She rose an eyebrow.

"And why are you looking for humans? To eat their brain?" She inquired. You shook your head rapidly. "N-No! Of course not! I not want to be alone." You explained. "I figured sound meant humans, humans meant friends, or death." You explained. "Well, I suppose you're right with that one." She admitted.

"Say, what's your name?" She inquired. "F/N." You responded. "F/N? Well that's a pretty name." She complimented. Your eyes widened. "P-Pretty? Thank you." You thanked softly. "What your name?" You tilted your head. "I'm Sue." She responded. "Y-You pretty name too." You complimented. She smiled.

"Thank you." She walked over to you. "You know, I like you. You have many possibilities, as you could help us get supplies. Zombies wouldn't attack you." She pointed out. "What do you say you come back with me to the base? It may be hard to convince the others to let you in, but it's worth a shot. Afterall, you could be quite useful to us, and you could not be alone in return. How does that sound?" She inquired. Your eyes brightened. "R-Really? Yes!" You nodded rapidly. She chuckled, as she took your hand gently. "Then let's head back." She stated as she started walking with you. You felt so excited to maybe start a new life... A better life. JAY: You rushed past the zombies, and noticed a guy trying to escape zombies grasp. He was crying, and looked terrified. You looked around frantically, and noticed a bat. You picked it up, and started to smash the zombies heads around you. You showed them no mercy, and when you were done, none were left.

You looked over at the man, who was staring at you in fear. "Escape. Lots of noise. Zombies follow." You explained as you grabbed his hand. He shook it off. "Get off me! I don't want to die b-by a monster!" He exclaimed. your eyes filled with hurt, as you looked down. "Sorry... I get going now... Good luck..." You spoke sadly as you turned away.

"W-Wait! No! Please don't leave me! i don't know how to f-fight I-I.. I can't turn into one of them! i don't want to die!" He cried softly. You stopped walking, and turned towards him. "Then trust me." You explained.

You heard the hisses of other zombies approaching, so you picked up Jay easily, and carried him out of the store. He yelped out in surprise, but didn't protest. You ran through the destroyed streets till you made it far enough away. You gently sat him down. "You good?" You inquired as you looked at his pale face.

He moved away from you as he started to throw up. Your eyes widened, and you gently walked over. "H-How I help!?" You exclaimed in a worried tone. He looked back at you in surprise, fear, and confusion. "W-Why do you care about helping me s-so much? Aren't you a zombie?" Stuttered. "Yes. I zombie. But protect humans is my goal." You explained. "They friend, not food." You added on. "H-How... How are you thinking like this? No other zombie has thought like this??" He inquired. You shrugged. "No idea. Woke up like this, here we are now." You explained. "You need help getting back to your base? I help!" You exclaimed. He stared at you for a moment, and sighed. "Fine... But I don't trust you yet, so don't push my buttons!" He huffed out as he started to walk. You smiled. "Understood!" You exclaimed.

JUDY: You heard sobs coming from the store, so you rushed inside to see a girl struggling to fight back. You looked down the street, and saw a women and a man running away.. You felt anger as you realized they ditched this girl, but you had no time to pay attention. You ripped the zombies away, and killed them quickly.

You looked at the girl. "You okay??" You inquired in a worried tone as you rushed over to her. You kneeled near her, and gently grabbed her hand, looking over for injuries. She just stared at you in shock, not being able to comprehend what just happened... "Y-You... You saved me...?" She whispered.

You looked up at her. "Did, yes." You nodded. "Friends ditch you?" You inquired softly. She looked down, as she nodded. "Y-Yeah.. I can't believe they did that to me..." She whispered as her eyes teared up. You felt so angry at these friends, but had to hold back. You stared at her for a moment, trying to decide what to do, before you gasped in shock as she hugged you tightly.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!!" She cried softly. You stayed still for a moment, as you were confused to why she was hugging you. You smiled softly as you hugged her back. "No... Problem. Help humans, my goal." You explained. "Don't wanna be alone anymore... Scary, sad, confusing..." You whispered.

She broke apart from the hug and looked at you. "I see... Well, I suppose... I can tag along with you. We can find a good base, and we can help each other out of this!" She exclaimed as she smiled. "What do you say??" She inquired. Your eyes brightened. "Yes! Please! I like that!" You exclaimed. She hugged you again.

"What's your name, by the way?" She questioned. "I... No remember. Blank memory..." You admitted. "Oh... Poor thing..." She whispered as she broke apart, cupping your pale face. "Until we figure it out... I'll call you... F/N!" She exclaimed. Your eyes widened. "F-F/N? I like..." You nodded happily. "What's first step??" You questioned. "I do anything help!" You added on. She smiled again as she stood up, helping you up. "Let's go get some supplies, then we set out for a new base! We don't need anyone!" She decided. You smiled, as you nodded. "Okay! Let's do!" You followed her around the store. It was a crappy situation of what happened to this nice women, but... At least something good came from it.

LAWRENCE: You tried to rush over, but gasped as you bumped into someone. "Sorry..." You spoke softly. You heard a familiar gasp. "F-F/N...?" He whispered. You looked up, and saw a familiar guy. But you couldn't remember where you saw him. "I-I know you?" You inquired. He nodded quickly.

"We were classmates. You gave me your umbrella on a rainy day..." He whispered. You tilted your head, as you racked your brain to try and remember. "I-I sorry... Memory shot, cloudy mostly..." You whispered. A slightly sad look crossed his face, but it was quickly replaced with a reassuring one.

"It's alright... I'll help you get your memory back. I just... Can't believe I couldn't protect you before this happened." He sighed. "Who turned you?" He inquired. "My... Mother.." You admitted. He sighed. "Of course it had to be someone close to you... This world is cruel, but I promise I will protect you now, alright?" He reassured as he gently cupped your cheek.

You flinched slightly, not expecting the touch. "Hey, it's alright. Let's get you back to the base, and I will do everything in my power to take care of you, and help you turn back into a human." He reassured. Your eyes brightened. "Y-You'll help me turn human again!? Yes! please!" You spoke happily.

You nodded quickly, excited. "Of course. You're special to me. And, I even have a few... People that could give up their brains for you." He spoke as a smirk formed. You felt a bit uneasy as he offered this with no hesitation. "Oh.. No... I eat no brains." You explained as you shook your head. "I want be human, eat brain won't turn me human." You explained.

"But... Thank you for offer." You thanked. He chuckled. "I suppose that's expected... You've always been so kind, and even now you're being kind." He smiled. "Come, let's get you back. I need to get you back before the other survivors return. They cannot know I'm taking you back, or else they'll throw a hissy fit..." He sighed. You tilted your head. "Where you take me?" You inquired. "Well... Let's just say, I cleaned out a basement of some old school, and you'll be perfectly safe there." He smirked. A bit of a dark look in his eyes. It kind of scared you, but you figured this was the only chance at feeling better... So you nodded. "O-Okay. Trust you." You explained as you followed him. Was this... The right choice?

(Thank you for reading this, and thanks for suggesting! It was really fun to write! If you'd like to request anything else, my inbox is always open! Have a good rest of your day, or night!)

Masterlist: https://www.tumblr.com/anxietysslave/708212002841083904/masterlist?source=share&ref=_tumblr

#x reader #headcannons #dangerous fellows #dangerousfellows #requests

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gevauxie · 3 months

Text

I had a Russian Doll toy when I was young.

Tom's diary was laid out on the bare prison desk before him. His ink was running low. He sucked at the nib of the quill, ignoring its bitter taste, using his tongue to wet the end. Once it was running freely again, he lowered it back down. He carried on scratching away.

...The doll was a gift. A hand-me-down, from some crazed Victorian benefactor who visited the orphanage once every other blue moon. She was an older woman; all fur coat and stiff upper lip, the kind that quite clearly had no time for children, and did her best to avoid them where she could. God knows why she donated to the crumbling monolith that was the Wool’s Institute for Impoverished Boys and Girls. Perhaps it made her look good to her high society friends. Perhaps it gave her something to boast about over dinner.

Regardless, she came to visit every now and then. We always knew she was coming because we were all forced to bathe the night before, and matron would come round with a nit-comb and an old tin box of talc. We’d have our hair scraped back and our shirt collars ironed out. Everything was packed and put away, and after breakfast we were made to stand in a long, straggly line by the front door.

The benefactor rang the doorbell. Nobody rang the doorbell. They either knocked on the knocker or they didn’t come at all.

She always hobbled in, clanking like the rusted screws on the side of a radiator. Her nose was hooked, her warts visible; my first encounter with what I thought was an old wicked witch. The classic bogeyman of children’s fairy stories – but a far cry from the real thing, I had come to realise.

She strode forwards, inspecting each of us in turn. We stood in alphabetical order, so as a member of the ‘R’s, I was toward the back of the queue. But she always paused when she got to me. Her black-toed heels came to a determined stop, and she peered down, meeting my eye.

She liked me. She always had. I couldn’t really put my finger on why; perhaps it was because she saw in me something that reminded her of herself. She saw the fire behind my gaze, no matter how forcefully I tried to smother it; she saw the flash of defiance, and the refusal to sit down and accept my lot. She looked at me and saw a fighter, a savage who would do anything – and everything – to achieve whatever it was that they wanted. I had a feral animal somewhere inside of me. At that age, I just needed to learn how to tame it.

The benefactor bent down, with what looked like great effort. She leant heavy on her cane and her knees popped. She produced the little doll from the inside of her fur coat pocket.

"Look at this," she said. "And tell me what you see."

I had looked at it. I had looked at its squat painted head, and at the delicate red and blue flowers that made up the pattern of its dress. I had taken it from her outstretched hand and had turned it over between both of my own. I remember the wooden curves of its surface being smooth.

"It’s fat," I said. "Fat and ugly."

The benefactor had sighed with impatience.

"Yes. But what else?"

I looked. I floundered. I shrugged at her.

"I don’t know."

She pointed a finger at the doll’s dark, heavy-lidded eyes.

"See, there? You think she’s looking at you. But really, she’s looking inward."

I had no idea what she meant. I tried turning the doll around, so that it caught the light. Nothing stood out to me.

"You might not realise it, but she has multiple faces," the benefactor said. "A woman can be tricky, like that. And sometimes men too."

Still, I saw nothing. I turned the doll back and forth.

"How does she hide them?" I asked. "Her faces?"

"By lying."

I had wrinkled my nose, disbelieving. I knew all about lying. I used it and I abused it, though I admit now that I hadn’t been very good. Not yet, at least. For example – I had no concept, back then, of lying to oneself, in order to protect the id from harm. I had no concept of wearing a ruse in order to go undercover, or of convincing oneself of an entirely different personality, for the sake of successful espionage.

"Lying?" I asked her, pretending I had never heard the word.

The benefactor smiled a rare smile. Her one good eye twinkled, knowing.

"Yes, boy. The doll works by wrapping itself within a lie – and then another, and another. All to hide a greater lie, underneath."

I turned the doll over between my fingers. "How?"

She reached out her long, bony hand to lift the doll back up from me. She twisted it and pulled off its egg-shaped head. Inside, another head appeared, slightly smaller than the last.

I remember that I had gasped. To me, the edges of her body had seemed so smooth. I’d had no idea there was an opening.

The benefactor didn’t stop there. She pulled off another head, and then another, going deeper and deeper until she reached the centre of the doll. She handed me the pieces, and I collected what I could between my little palms.

She never asked for them back, so one by one, I had slipped them into my trouser pockets. I could feel the other children’s eyes burning into my side, lime-green from jealousy.

"You can’t trust people, Tom." Before me, the benefactor heaved herself back upward, moving with more popping sounds and a dangerously straining wheeze. Her cane wobbled as she leant on it. "Now, let that be a lesson to you."

A few years later, I was offered my place at Hogwarts’ School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I forgot all about the old Victorian benefactor – and all about the toy she had bequeathed me, and the message she had tried to send. I thought I was better than her. I thought I was better than everyone, and I didn’t need anyone else’s sage advice, thankyou very much.

So, really, it’s my own damn fault that I’m in the situation I’m in.

______

Chapter 12, 'Matryoshka', from WIP Tomione fic 'Kiss Me Before You Go'. The rest of the fic is available to read on AO3:

#tomione #tom riddle x hermione granger #tomione fanfiction #tom riddle #hermione granger #harry potter fanfiction #current wip

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 2 years

Note

Miss Raven giving the biggest sigh of her life because of Rollo(?) and Sebek giving her the S T A R E S like, she already puts up with so many sheningans (hint: J word) can't she just have a normal life for once???? This is too much for her poor birb heart

[It looks like this has turned into an ongoing series 😅 so I'll post the related posts in order: Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4]

When Miss Raven leaves NRC for the symposium thinking she'll get a break from the usual shenanigans, only to run into even more shenanigans off-campus... 😅

“Whatever are you tense for, young Crowley? You’re as stiff as a tree stump. Fufu… Don’t tell me, are you the type that is afraid of knowing the unknown?”

“N-No, I’m not!! It just feels like someone’s staring at me, and I don’t like it. Aren’t you bothered by it, Malleus-senpai?”

“Not at all. We have been extended an invitation to learn of a new school and the culture of the surrounding city. It would be best if you do not allow fear to squander this opportunity.”

(And in the background of Malleus and Raven’s conversation, you’ll just hear…

“GAAAAH!! DID YOU SEE WHAT I SAW JUST NOW?! Malleus-sama, in all of his kindness and infinite wisdom, has comforted the bird!! IT’S AS THOUGH THEY’RE LONG LOST SIBLINGS…! HNNNNGH....! I’M MOVED TO TEARS, BUT I AM ALSO ENVIOUS!! MALLEUS-SAMAAA, PLEASE SHOWER THIS SEBEK WITH YOUR PRAISE AS WELL!!”

“... You’re a troublesome one, aren’t you?”)

***ADDENDUM*** (since I had this queued to post before part 3 came out; there are spoilers for Glorious Masquerade part 3 below the cut):

xbksvsuwjss I wonder how Rollo would feel knowing that Raven is someone who wasn’t capable of magic before (since she was had the body of a regular bird), but then willingly subjected herself to tough circumstances in which she was able to turn human and learn how to use magic 😂 Let’s be honest though, he’d probably hate it and not understand why she made that decision.

Aaaand now she also has to deal with magic sucking flowers and Rollo monologuing about eradicating magic 😶 Fun trip. Reeeeal fun.

#twst oc #twisted wonderland oc #Sebek Zigvolt #Malleus Draconia #Rollo Flamme #Raven Crowley #notes from the writing raven #my art #idk it was silly and I wanted to doodle something #spoilers #Rollo Flamm

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gisenchy · 1 year

Text

drinking from a poisoned well (from my tinyletter)

I wonder if I will ever stop trying to find myself in the culture I consume. I also wonder if the culture I consume is as much of a mirror as I think it is - does it have anything to do with me? Does it reflect me? And by reflect I mean does it tell you something about who I am, what matters to me, what I stand for?

Kanye West recently released his album Donda. As a reformed Kanye West fan, I’ve tried to find the words to describe the dull yet pulsing ache I feel when I think about his music and the impact that he has had on my life, whether I like it or not. I’ve issued a blanket mute to anyone I see posting that they are listening to his album...an album which I don’t need to listen to to know that it isn’t good. But more than the quality of the music itself, I don’t need to listen to the album because I don’t need to support his public alignment with accused and convicted rapists and sexual deviants, homophobes, anti-Semites, and misogynists. I have several problematic faves, but I don’t have 1 hour and 48 minutes to find out if anything on Donda is worth seeing past the list of collaborators, and the glaring lack of women in an album dedicated to his late mother. I don’t know the answer, I don't want to know, and I don't want to care.

Maybe that is the name for that dull, pulsing ache. Care. But not in the sense of, I care for you. In the sense of somehow this affects me with clear undertones of I wish it didn’t. Like seeing an embarrassing photo of yourself from years ago. Or like this week, I got a request from someone who asked about Fly Art prints. Toni and I have only spoken publicly (lol) about the slow death of Fly Art once and it is as simple as the two of us not being interested in the project anymore and also as complex as my (I can’t speak for Toni) relationship to the music and artists that I love and follow.

I have loved rap music for a finite amount of time. I think it came about as a result of having dabbled in dance, and also my appreciation for a good fucking beat. I admired the brashness with which a rapper could admit their (though it was often his) faults while also boasting of their success. As a very self-conscious yet vaguely confident (in the right context!) person, I saw myself reflected in the tricky balance between humility and the skill of embodying my own self. I promise! I am! So self-conscious. Rap, and by extension hip-hop fed my soul. When I first moved to Sydney, I attended a Yeezus show in total nosebleed seats. Kanye played the intro to Runaway twice after asking who in the audience was hearing it live for the first time. It was one of the best concerts I had ever been to. I still chase this same feeling: the distance from the stage bridged through shared, mutual adoration.

I leaned on Fly Art as part of my personality until the proverbial reed broke. I thought it made me cool and influential. I loved the attention so much. And it was fucking fun! Until we tried to make money off of it (We succeeded though) and it became a job. It was no longer fun, more than a cool hobby that made me feel cool and popular. And I just stopped listening to hip-hop. My taste in music changed, and it seemed that every rapper I admired was on a mission to remind me they were straight cishet men doing straight cishet men things, including:

Denying the existence of slavery, supporting one of the actual worst presidents of the United States, which is saying something considering they’re all fucking hacks (Kanye West)

Appearing to have groomed young women...and giving R FUCKING KELLY A WRITING CREDIT IN 2021 (Drake)

Threatening to boycott Spotify if they didn’t return the music of someone who abused their partner (Kendrick Lamar for xxxtentacion, weird tbh)

Fighting with women who were trying to encourage the general public to read??? (J. Cole, in an odd bid against literacy)

Featuring Chris Brown (unfortunately too many to name)

In summary, just a lot of stuff that left a bad taste in my mouth and left me questioning what I had signed up for. What my support meant. Worse, what did my profiting off of the work of black artists say about me across the ugly ugly backdrop of gender-based violence, systemic racism and police brutality? The slow death of Fly Art was really just the same story over and over again: people change and they indeed realise things. They do not condone misogyny and misinformation, which I strive to do. I also cannot stand albums longer than 16 tracks. Who even has the time?

That isn’t to say I don’t listen to any rap or hip-hop music at all. There is still a lot of it on rotation!!! But I can’t think of anything more exhausting than seeing Donda on my feed multiple times. I don’t have to listen to the album. I cannot believe how hard I stanned this man. Part of my disgust and anger is definitely directed towards me. There is an endless bowl of shame in there. I often call myself a “reformed Kanye West fan” because there is so much of his music that I love. And I resent him so deeply now because the more he continues to do *gestures vaguely* whatever this is, the more poisoned the well feels.

I understand that it is possible to like problematic people and to support artists or people in general who aren’t perfect. It is inevitable that everyone has fucked up at least once in their life. It feels like I’m reliving a cycle of disappointment that I feel for myself when I make a mistake or when I am unkind. Ha, maybe the point isn’t to find yourself in what’s out there, but to find it (speak to the manager) within. Maybe I just feel envious of people who are able to separate the art from the artist?

On the other hand, fuck that. There is a line. In a world that is rapidly taking away a woman’s right to her own body, where we are constantly in a deluge of violence of all sorts from men in power, I cannot believe that people I know are still listening to Kanye West! Openly!!!! Is any gesture of support worth the pain inflicted by the men I mentioned above? There will eventually be a time when I stop drinking from this bowl of shame, alienation and just straight up anger, but at the very least I know my answer. I want people to know that this shit doesn't sit right with me, because how else can we demand for something better? That’ll be enough. It has to be enough.

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glassheartjukebox · 3 years

Text

thigh highs

haikyuu’s reaction to seeing their crush in thigh highs

captains -> liberos

feat. daichi, oikawa, kuroo, bokuto, ushijima

“i slithered here from eden

just to sit outside your door” - from eden

a/n: just got a pair in the mail and i thought fuck it! why not project onto fictional men!

daichi

when you walked into the gym in your school uniform plus a new pair of black thigh high socks, his first reaction was “goddamn”

his second immediate reaction was PROTECT

he knows how noya and tanaka can get

and he doesn’t want to subject you to that

that’s definitely the only reason, he definitely doesn’t just want you all to himself oh no no

he approaches with his usual endearing smile

what is unusual is his bright red cheeks

you notice that as he talks to you, he’s leading you out of the gym

you humor him, choosing to wait until you’re outside to question him

“you’re acting weird. why are you red? why did you lead me out of the gym?”

his eyes widen, clearly trapped in his own dumbassery

“i just wanted to talk to you!” he replies

“that only answered part of my question daichi.” you said, clearly unimpressed

suddenly he was avoiding eye contact and rubbing the back of his neck

“honestly? i didn’t want noya and tanaka to freak out about the... new addition to your uniform.”

it all clicked right then for you

“is that why you were all red?” you teased

playing with the top band of your thigh highs you looked at him and asked, “do you like them that much daichi?”

why not tease a lil?

oikawa

oikawa is very observant, and immediately noticed the new thigh highs

“ooh what are these,” he smirked at you, gesturing to your thighs

you knew you looked good, and decided to play dumb

“oh! they’re thigh highs! my legs get a little cold during class and i found these at the mall. do you like them,” you smiled at him, feigning innocence

clearly expecting a flirty reply, oikawa stuttered a lil

“i- they look very nice! very fashionable!”

at this point, you were struggling to hold back your laughter

your oblivious response to his obvious attempt at flirting had clearly caught him off guard

and he had no idea to continue without sounding like a complete perv

you’d achieved the impossible: flustering oikawa

not only that, but he obviously liked them a little too much

you: 1, oikawa: 0

kuroo

flirty bastard part 2

not as smooth as oikawa usually is

you two already had a flirty banter based friendship, so this shouldn’t have been out of the ordinary for him

for whatever reason, the thigh highs almost made him go feral

but alas, kuroo is a man of self restraint

so, as he approached you, he looked from you thighs to your face and wiggled his eyebrows

“those are new,” he smirked at you

“wow, i didn’t know you payed that much attention to me kuroo. if i didn’t know better, i’d think you had a crush on me,” you giggled

he clutched at his chest, “you really know how to kick a man when he’s down. first wounding me by wearing those thigh highs then teasing me? you’re ruthless”

you both busted out laughing, and all of your friends rolled their eyes

you two were oblivious to each other’s feelings and insisted the other one was just teasing you

in the middle of some casual conversation, the morning bell rang

you bid your goodbye and went to walk towards class until kuroo grabbed your elbow

he leaned in right next to your ear and whispered, “by the way, i do really like those thigh highs kitten.”

bokuto

he. is. o v e r j o y e d.

“hey! y/n! i loved your socks! they make your thighs look great!”

he says this a little too loud, earning a very exasperated look from a akaashi

you give akaashi a sympathetic smile as a he splits from bokuto, clearly trying to save himself the embarrassment

by the time bokuto is next to you, you’re bright red

every enthusiastic, bokuto exclaims, “you’re so cute when you blush!”

he’s not trying to be embarrassing

but bokuto does not hide his crush well

mostly because he has no intention to you

he’s a genuine guy and he wants you to know his feelings for you are just as genuine as he is

“thank you bokuto,” you say softly

despite the embarrassment, you can’t help but give him a shy smile

he has no idea what he’s doing to your heart

“you already look pretty in your uniform but the socks make you look even better!” his smile is contagious and you begin giggling

in a moment of boldness, you get on your tiptoes to give him a kiss on the cheek

“thanks bokuto, i’ll be sure to wear them again tomorrow.”

now he’s the flustered one

ushijima

he hadn’t seen you yet today when he arrived to practice

the only reason he found out was because he heard goshiki talking about it

“y/n senpai was wearing the super long socks that hugged their thighs today! i didn’t think they could get any prettier!”

ushijima was intrigued, but he kept his mouth shut

instead he focused on practice until the thought slipped his mind entirely

however, you and your thighs took a front seat in his mind as soon as he stepped out of practice and saw you talking when your friends in the hallway

goshiki was right, they did make you even more attractive

the little bulge of skin that came over the tops of the socks was really screwing with his head

as soon as your friends departed, he approached

“ushijima, are you okay? you’re a little red, could you be getting sick?” there was genuine worry in his voice

tendou who had caught onto the situation snickered from the other end of the hallway and sighed, “ah, young love”

“no, i am fine,” he replied before adding, “i came over to tell you that you look very nice today.”

after that he departed without another word, leaving you flustered at the rare compliment he gave you

©glassheartjukebox all written content belongs to this user. do not repost, modify, or copy content

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duvetsandpillows · 3 years

Text

Sebastian Vettel Fluffy A-Z

Gif Credit: @chasingpegasus

A = Attractive: what do they find attractive about the other?

Your kindness. You are always looking for the best in everyone and you always put others before yourself. He calls you his little angel because he thinks you’re too good to be of this earth.

B = Baby: do they want a family? why/why not?

Seb knew he wanted to have kids with you after he saw you with one for the first time. Your friend had a baby and you’d offered to babysit for a night so she could go out. Seb got back from work to see you dancing around the living room with the baby girl in your arms, the two of you listening to Queen.

“Liebling what have we said about stealing babies?” You turned around and rolled your eyes.

“I know, I’ll give her back tomorrow.” He chuckled and gave you a kiss before cooing to the baby.

Once you’d put her down for the night you turned around from her cot to see Seb standing in the doorway.

“I didn’t know you were so good with kids.” You shrugged and gently ushered him out the room, pulling the door to.

“I dunno, used to look after my cousins when I was growing up.” He smiled and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

“Do you ever think about having your own one day?” he asked wrapping his arms around your shoulders.

“I think I’d like having a pair of feet pattering around the house.”

A year later you found out you were expecting two sets of feet to cause mayhem and Sebastian couldn’t have been happier when he found out.

C = Cuddle: how do they cuddle?

Sebastian loves to wrap his arms around your shoulders from behind. He loves being able to hold you close and press kisses to the top of your head. In bed he loves to be big spoon, having you curled into his chest, your leg hooked between his. He will kiss the side of your head and whisper sweet nothings in German to you as you fall asleep.

D = Dates: what are dates with them like?

The two of you don’t always get time for dates as he travels so much so you always cook dinner for when he gets back from a race. It’s guaranteed time for the two of you to have some alone time together. You don’t need extravagant dates, being together is enough.

E = Everything: "you are my ____" (e.g my life, my world...)

You are my forever and always.

F = Feelings: when did they know they were falling in love?

He knew he had feelings for you pretty quickly. Whenever he was home from work you would be his first thought and he realised that he loved you and no one could ever compare to you.

G = Gentle: are they gentle? If so, how?

Seb is always gentle with you, sure you two muck around and play fight but he would never intentionally hurt you.

H = Hand/Hold: how do they like to hold? how do they like to hold hands?

When out and about you can guarantee his fingers will be laced with yours. He likes keeping you close, knowing how you can get overwhelmed in big crowds so will always squeeze to give you reassurance that you’re not some and that you’re going to be okay.

I = Impression: first impression/s

You were an old family friend but you two hadn’t seen each other since the two of you were kids. Sebs mother had invited your family over for a barbecue since Seb was home for a while. When he came down stairs he saw you chatting with his auntie, and he couldn’t believe it was really you. You’d gone from being an adorable little girl to a stunning young woman.

You glanced away from his aunt and caught him staring at you so you flashed a smile and a small wave. Seb immediately had an unexplainable wave of anxiety wash over him. He walked over and his auntie excused herself to let the two of you catch up.

“Long time no see,” you said offering him a beer, which he accepted.

“I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.”

“It’s a lucky day for both of us then.”

The two of you were inseparable for the rest of the day, causing both your mother’s and his auntie to have plenty to gossip about.

The two of you ended up staying up all night chatting around the fire pit, cuddled up in a blanket together.

“Can’t risk you getting a cold or something,” he whispered wrapping his arm around you.

J = Joker: are they into pulling pranks?

You two would be silly and make each other laugh with shitty dad jokes and puns but you two weren’t prank sort of people.

K = Kisses: how do they kiss?

Sebastian is quite reserved in public so usually kisses your head or cheek but in private he will kiss you anywhere he can, he finds it hard to keep his hands and lips off you.

L = Love: who says I love you first?

He did. You two had been dating for a couple of months and he just knew it was love but he was worried that it was too soon to say it to you. I hat was until you two had gone out for drinks with some friends and you two ended up getting a taxi home and leaving the car at the bar.

Sebastian poured the two of you a whisky while you kicked off your shoes and lit the fire. Seb sat down next to you and passed your drink before wrapping an arm around you.

“Did you know…” you slurred turning your head to look at him, “you are my favourite person,” you pressed a kiss to his jaw before pressing kisses to his neck, leaving a small mark.

“Did you know that I love you,” he slurred back. You looked up at him in shock, just as much as he was; realising what he’d just said.

“Really? You love me?”

“How could I not, you’re perfect.”

M = Memory: their favourite moment together

You hadn’t been able to go to a race weekend and even though he didn’t show it he was bummed. You felt just as sad so you wanted to make it up to him. He got back to see candles lit everywhere and music playing softly in the background. The table was laid and dinner waiting. You were in the dress you’d worn on your first proper date together, which was coincidentally Sebastians favourite.

You spent the whole night pampering him after he’d worked so hard and by the end of the night the two of you were cuddled with up under a blanket by the fire.

N = Nickel: do they spoil? do they buy the person they love everything?

Sebastian likes to occasionally spoiled you with jewellery or clothes. You don’t like him spending so much money on you but he would always respond with “nonsense my angel deserves the best.”

O = Orange: what colour reminds them of their other half?

Light green. You wore a necklace that you’d had since you were a kid and it had a small light green emerald inside it. He was so used to seeing you wear it he automatically associated the colour with you.

P = Pet names: what pet names do they use?

Engelchen, Schatz, my everything.

Q = Quaint: what is their favourite non-modern thing?

Cuddling up by the fire and chatting. You would sit there for hours discussing anything that came to mind. You just enjoyed being in each others company.

R = Rainy Day: what do they like to do on a rainy day?

Usually you would start the day by trying to do jobs around the house but Seb gets bored and insists that you two take a break that never seems to end. Then you usually watch a movie or cuddling up in bed.

S = Sad: how do they cheer themselves/each other up

Sebastian goes quiet and finds ways to occupy himself. You always notice fairly quickly and walk over to him, wrapping your arms around his waist and hugging him tight.

“I love you so much,” you will say giving him a squeeze, causing him to hold you as tight as he can and let everything out that’s on his mind. As long as you were in his arms he felt safe.

T = Talking: what do they love to talk about?

Anything. You two could talk about paint drying and find a way to make it interesting. He spends half his day texting you random things because he misses you.

U = Unencumbered: What helps them relax?

Taking baths together. He brought a purposefully large bath so that you two could both fit in it. He loves holding you close, with your back against his chest and pressing kisses to the side of your head or neck while whispering how much he loves you.

V = Vaunt: what do they like to show off? What are they proud of?

Seb only shows off on track. His personal life is kept private.

W = Wedding: when, how, where do they propose?

Seb proposed to you on your three year anniversary. You were four months pregnant and didn’t really want to dress up all fancy and have to go out so Seb set up a beautiful dinner in the back garden. After you had finished pudding Seb took your hand in his and told you how much you mean to him before getting down on one knee and asked you the questions. You said yes and pressed your lips to him before he slid the ring on your finger. You had the wedding a few months after you gave birth so you could have the kids in the photos.

X = Xylophone: What's their song?

Thunderstruck - AC/DC

Y = You're the ___ to my ___ (e.g the cookies to my milk, the macaroni to my cheese)

You're the lightning to my thunder.

Z = Zebra: if they wanted a pet, what pet would they get?

You both had dogs but when you got pregnant you got a puppy so your kids could grow up with their own dog.

#f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 one shot #formula 1 one shot #f1 x reader #formula one fanfic #formula one imagine #sebastian vettel x reader #sebastian vettel one shot #sebastian vettel imagine #sebastian vettel fanfic #f1 fluffy a z #fluffy a z

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unprofessional-bard · 3 years

Text

Don't Push It, Pt. 1

Unprofessional Bard's Masterlist

Part 2 (1/2)

Based on this request.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female!Reader

Warnings: Age gap (the reader is 26 and Joel is 53), a lot of teasing/sexual tension, implied romantic feelings.

Summary: It's been going on for years. They both know better than to act on their feelings, but patience starts running thin when a few boundaries are crossed.

Word Count: 5.280

Author's Note: Okay y'all so I am a whore for Joel with long hair and I unintentionally made this into a fix-it au where Joel is alive. Also, the reader is going to have some OC characteristics to fit the scenario better. Finally, this fic changes POV's a lot, so I'm gonna clear that up:

• ----R and below: The reader's POV.

• ----J and below: Joel's POV.

• ----B and below: Both POV's.

The fic starts off with Joel's POV.

Enjoy!

gif credits: nikolai-stavrogin

"Hey, Joel," Dina called over to the man sipping coffee on his porch.

"Mornin' Dina," He replied as his daughter's girlfriend walked over to him. Her baby bump had grown a little more and it never failed to put a smile on Joel's face.

"There's a little trouble with the patrol today," She said. "Jesse won't be able to make it to patrol with (Y/N)."

Shit.

"And they're askin' me to fill in?" He sat up a little.

"Yup, Maria told me to ask you if-"

"No problem, sure, I'll do it." He spoke nonchalantly, then asked if Jesse was alright. Dina told him she wasn't sure, that it must be something important for him to miss patrol, which made Joel nod: "You told (Y/N) too, or...?"

"No, but she's gonna be there regardless. I doubt that she knows."

"Alright, thanks Dina," Joel got up and she smiled in return before walking over to Ellie's place.

It was wrong. By the lord it was wrong, but he couldn't help it. You were fierce, confident, determined and disciplined; qualities he came to appreciate in time, but a bit differently only when it came to you. He shouldn't want you, an unknown source in his mind kept telling himself, but he did. He didn't know why, he never found himself being attracted to a woman your age, yet you had him under your spell. Oh the things you did to him...

Worst part was, he couldn't have you, whether he liked it or not. Nevermind the fact that you were too young for him, you probably didn't want him anyways- despite the crystal clear signals he got from you. It was just how you were, though: A little physical and perhaps a little flirty, but he could just be confusing that with your confidence.

Or he could be overthinking everything.

Joel readied his backpack, but realised there was still a little more than an hour before the rendez-vous, so he decided to head over to your place to tell you about the news to kill some time. After he made it there and knocked on your door while calling your name a couple of times, which were left unanswered, your neighbour curiously looked over the fences and called over to Joel: "She left a while ago... For the gym, I think."

"Thank you," Joel smiled politely and earned a wave from the lady in return. He took his time as he walked over to the gym. After he arrived, he looked around for awhile to spot where you were, but when he found it, the sight almost made him choke.

There you were, ankles crossed as you pulled yourself up and chin over the barfix with closed eyes, a frown and a clenched jaw. Sweat laced the sides of your face and Joel's eyes wandered lower: You were wearing a sports bra and matching shorts which hugged your frame tightly and the sun was shining directly onto your muscles, which the lord himself carved out and were also sweaty, but Joel didn't care - it made you look more attractive, if anything. You let out a huff and lowered yourself down, while he tried to collect himself. He didn't want to disturb you so he decided to wait until you finished...

...but you didn't seem to be finishing any time soon. He didn't want to look like a creep as he stood there and waited, so after you did another pull up and let yourself down, he cleared his throat.

----R

"(Y/N), here you are."

Had you not been already hanging, you definitely would've fell when you heard Joel's voice reach your ears. You opened your eyes to see him slowly approach you, his stupid thumb stuck in behind his stupid belt.

You hated it: You hated finding this man attractive and you hated your guts for occasionally flirting with him - him, who probably would never look at you the way you looked at him. He liked you, of course, he enjoyed your company but not the way you wanted him to. You hated that you had a crush on this man, who became even more gorgeous as he let his hair grow over the last few years, you also hated how he neatly parted it to the left.

Patrol with him was both a treat and a curse at the same time. You got to spend time with him, which made it a treat, but when you watched him- saw him in action, how aggressive he was, heat started to pool between your thighs. He was so rough and precise as he was smart; he always knew what to do under any circumstance, so you almost never worried when you went out with him. He made you feel safe, praised you and played with your heart when he responded to your flirting and nothing came out of it.

You hated it because your little "crush" on him was pathetic, for someone as confident as you. Sure, you teased and flirted with him, but one praise as simple as you did well today and you'd be melting on spot. You even tried to get with other people to distract yourself, to no avail. They weren't Joel.

None of them could ever be Joel.

"Good morning!" You said with a high pitched voice, reflecting your struggle to keep yourself up.

"To you too," He chuckled at your state and watched as you pulled yourself up slowly. "Hey, listen. Jesse ain't gonna make it to patrol today so I'm fillin' in for him."

----B

The way you faltered a little didn't escape him: "Why? Is he okay?"

"I dunno, but I'm sure he is. Something important must've come up," Joel informed you, not wanting to worry you as you seemed to care about him. A lot. Ugh.

"Tsk," You breathed out and closed your eyes to focus on keeping your head above the metal bar.

Joel then spoke again: "Yeah, I was just here to let ya know."

"Okay, well-" You exhaled audibly and suddenly let yourself go. The force of the action sent you flying a little and it almost made you bump into him: "Woah, oh, sorry-"

"Woah there," You both chuckled at the same time. Joel held you by your elbows to help you balance yourself and your heart rate picked up pace when you realised how close your face was to his chest a moment ago - the chest you wanted to get your hands on: How muscular was he? How many scars did he have there? How would it feel to run your fingers through the hair as you ro-

"Uhm, yeah, as I was saying," You snapped yourself back to reality and took a small step back, disappointed by the way his fingers let go of your arms: "I'm done here, just need to do a couple of stretches, then head back and take shower."

"Right. Well, I'll see you at the gate, then?"

"Uh, sure, yeah."

You didn't know what else to say other than stay. You wanted him near you and around you, you wanted to show off to him and you wanted his attention, so you had to think quick.

Joel didn't want to leave either, even though you were going to spend the whole day together. He still nodded and turned around to leave. It was then, when a brilliant idea crossed your mind: "Actually, Joel?" He turned around, gave you a soft look that made you want to run up to him and kiss all over his face. "Could you help me with my stretches?"

If he'd been drinking or eating anything, he most definitely would've choked: "Help you?"

"Yeah," You flashed a smile at him. "It's simple, you just gotta press me down and keep me in place." The widening of his eyes, puzzled face and his tense posture made you shy. "Eh- Normally, Jesse helped me with them."

True. Some stretches required someone to push your body to its limits - when you worked out alone, you stuck to simpler stretches, but right now, you needed a reason to have him by your side.

Joel was torn between leaving, like a responsible person who knew when to walk away would. He was responsible, yes, but his moral compass was thrown out of the window whenever you joined the picture. So far, he wanted to think he was handling his emotions well- by not acting on them and not talking about them.

Now, however, it was as if he was facing the last straw. He had a few boundaries left to cross, and this was one of them.

"Plus, I'm a bit tired to do them. Will you help me?"

Lies. All lies.

You'd been doing these stretches for long enough, even though you'd worked hard, you weren't tired at all. Joel thought this to be the case, so he tried to go around it: "You sure? I mean, how're you tired?"

"I've been training like hell this morning," You settled on the mat. "I don't wanna do these stretches, but I have to. I'm not in the mood to pull a muscle today."

That was good enough for him really: "'Kay," He sighed. "What do you need me to do?"

Your eyes glowed in excitement before you faced forward and explained: "Im gonna lean forward, like this-" You extended your legs forward and lowered yourself down. "All you gotta do is press on my back and stop me from moving away for a few seconds."

A few seconds which felt like five minutes, truth be told.

As soon as he touched your bare back, you sighed, then forced it into a hiss. He immediately retreated his hands, thinking he hurt you, pushing the ludicrous idea that you might have moaned away immediately.

His hands were big and a little cold comparing to your skin which was on fire after the workout, but you'd be lying if you said you didn't do that on purpose. You straightened up and looked at him with an innocent smile: "Your hands are cold."

Not cold enough to make you react like that, obviously.

Joel offered an awkward chuckle from the back of his throat: "You're gonna have to deal with it, missy."

And deal with it you did- barely. Christ, that was a bad idea, your worst one yet. To have his hands on your bare skin, pressing you down made your cheeks burn and mouth hang open as he kept you in place. You almost didn't hear him when he spoke, too busy trying to comprehend the size of his hands and how they'd feel around your throa-

"How many of these do you gotta do?"

"Uh, dunno," You blurted out. "Not too many."

Joel was partly glad, it felt so wrong yet it was just a simple act of help you could've asked from anyone. After 20 seconds of staying like that, you straightened. You went into a head-to-knee position and gave him an okay to press you down again.

You switched to the other leg after half a minute, but you were running out of ideas. There weren't any positions left that you could use his help with, so you played one last card to ruin him: "More."

"W-What?"

Good riddance.

"Press a little harder," You pretended to focus and tried your best not to smirk, knowing you had him where you wanted.

"Oh- hm," He cleared his throat and pressed a little more down on your back. If your plan hadn't backfired and made you almost moan through your teeth, everything was going accordingly.

Joel went to pull back, but stopped when you added: "It's been a while since I did these..."

Christ.

"That enough?" He slowly retreated his hands and stood up, watching you lean up where you sat.

"Yup, that'll be it," You smiled and blinked a couple of times. If Joel had known better, he would've thought you were making him do that, then being all cute on purpose-

It was going to be a long day.

----R

Patrol with the older Miller went as normally as it always was. Part one usually went like this: Meet up at the gate, get your rifles and horses, ride out, reach checkpoint one and sign your names. The road to checkpoint one didn't have any trouble, it usually never did. It was more quiet between you two than usual though. Had you gone too far?

"So, uh," You said once the two of you mounted your horses again. "You coming to the dance tonight?"

"What?" He snapped his head in your direction, looking clueless. "What dance?"

"Well, not a dance exactly but- you know what I mean?" You started riding. "The adults only event?"

He looked really distracted, a bit tense even: "Oh, right. You know those ain't my thing."

"I know," You nodded with a soft smile. "But I haven't seen you in any event ever since you decked Seth."

"Decked?" Joel chuckled bitterly at the memory.

"He deserved it, and more, that prick," You rolled your eyes, making him chortle.

"And nobody managed to shut up about it for the whole month," He sighed with a gorgeous yet tired smile on his face which you managed to see just in time. "So, no thanks. I'll pass."

"Aw, come on," You whined. "You can't avoid coming to these events forever. Please?"

He gave you a confused look, his smile slowly disappearing but not in a bad way: "Why?"

A good question. Oh, no reason, just wanna try and make a move on you, quite possibly jump your bones if it all goes well.

"I wanna make sure you haven't lost your ability to socialise." You offered.

"Really? Why, you're my momma now?"

"Ew, no," You both laughed. "Can't I be sure my friend is alive and well occasionally?"

----J

Friend.

A word that made Joel stop and think.

You saw him as a friend, huh? Two people, with clear sexual tension and an obvious age gap between them- Friends was an awkward description for him, but it was better than nothing.

He opened his mouth to reply, to insist that he was indeed alive and well, but you stopped him: "You know what I mean."

The conversation was making him a little distracted, he noticed, so he decided to keep his mouth shut until you reached checkpoint two. You didn't press him on, which was also a delight. That's another thing he liked about you: You knew your bounds- in patrol anyways. Or maybe it was because you got to know him well over the time, knew what he liked or not.

Part two went quieter too- infected and conversation wise. Not even a single runner was on sight as you swept through the small cabins and houses. Except for the occasional clear's and nothing here's, you didn't say anything else. Joel itched to talk to you, about anything to break the silence, but he was too lost in thought.

When you finally made it back to Jackson, you finally spoke up: "So? You coming?" He chuckled, mostly out of relief, then you added: "I found a new outfit, I wanna know what you think."

That caught Joel's attention. With a curious smile, after handing over your horses, he asked: "What outfit?"

"You'll see... If you come." You smirked, your close proximity making Joel's heart race.

"Don't get your hopes up," He sighed with a small grin and tucked his thumb behind his belt, the other one gripping the strap of his rifle.

"You're the worst," You punched his shoulder with mock upset, making him chortle and stumble a little to the right. "Anyways, I'll see you tomorrow then."

Joel remained quiet, then you walked away with a soft smile gracing your lips. The words sunk deeper than he would've liked, a sudden wave of guilt soaking his guts with regret, even though you didn't sound disappointed or upset. Lips pursed, he watched you hand your rifle to Peter and sign off, then leave; his steps coming to a halt as you did.

He just might check out what was up at the dance tonight, if he could successfully move himself out of his comfort zone in the following few hours.

----R

"Well well, look who it is," Tommy grinned when you approached the doors of the pub. The night had settled across the sky by the time you stepped outside your place. The sound of music and chatter of the people from inside filled your ears.

"Yours truly," You smirked. "It's crowded in there huh?"

"It sure is," Tommy said as he turned around to lead you inside. "Adults only events tend to attract more people, as y'can guess. Don't you look pretty today."

"Why thank you." You smiled playfully: "For no one, but myself, at that."

You lied through your teeth. You had dressed up in the silly hope that Joel would actually show up. You had been planning on it ever since you came across the item wrapped around your hips in an abandoned clothes shop a few weeks ago, and this event was the perfect excuse for you to wear it. For him.

"I ain't sayin' nothing!" Tommy raised his hands up in defense. "Figured that much, haven't seen anyone catch your interest in a long time."

Ha. Nice.

The atmosphere was lively and the air was warm, full of energy. Chatter and dancing went about the packs of people scattered across the space, but you couldn't see Joel, much to your disappointment - you weren't surprised though. What surprised you was Jesse suddenly showing up.

"Where's Ellie and Dina?" You asked after a while of teasing him about missing patrol.

"They decided to stay behind, I guess." He shrugged.

"What can I get y'all?" Tommy smiled, suddenly appearing behind the counter. Without waiting for an answer, he filled two glasses and pushed them towards you. You and Jesse looked at each other for a brief moment, before knocking it back at one go. "Woah there..."

A round of laughter later, you felt someone's presence behind you, then they tapped you on the shoulder: "Hey, (Y/N)!"

Much to your disappointment, once more, it was a boy named Mark. He was a year older than you, had no features whatsoever matching Joel's prettier ones and he took an obvious liking to you, which in truth you didn't appreciate, even though he wasn't weird about it or anything. You faked a smile and turned to him a little: "Hi."

"Good to see you," Sure. "How, uh, how are you?"

"Busy, actually," You pointed at the glass Tommy was refilling for you.

"Mind if I join?" He made himself comfortable on the stool next to you.

"Yeah. I do." Your smile never faded but your words were laced with poison.

He looked between you, Tommy and Jesse, mortified at your answer: "W- Heh, well, would you wanna dance later, then-?"

"No, I don't." You spoke calmly and turned to face Jesse again, only for him to move to tap you on the shoulder, which Tommy stopped from happening.

"Why don't you go home, huh?" He grabbed his wrist firmly, but not hard enough to leave a bruise of course. "The lack of oxygen in your brain's clearly stoppin' you from understandin' a word as simple as no."

You looked over at the younger Miller, a stern look on his face which seemed to make Mark piss himself. Suddenly, an even deeper voice was heard behind the boy: "I advise you to listen to him, son."

You turned completely in your seat to see Joel grabbing Mark by the shoulders, making him jump, then remove him from the seat carefully. Mark's legs were quick to oblige, making him walk towards the exit, but Joel held him in place: "A-ah, what do you say to the lady?"

"I'm s-sorry, (Y/N)," He nodded quickly. "I'll never disturb you again, I promise."

"Good boy," Joel patted him on the back, which sent him running to the door. Your cheeks were suddenly burning and you couldn't help but smile shyly.

"Tsk, what a jackass," Tommy nodded disapprovingly as Joel took the now empty space next to you.

"You decided to show then, huh?" You smirked at Joel.

"Yeah, figured you'd break someone's wrists and make 'em eat it," He chuckled, tipping his head at his brother in a greeting -God he looked so handsome, was that a new shirt?- before he continued: "Decided it'd be a shame to miss it."

You giggled and lightly pushed at his arm, almost immediately feeling the muscles underneath the rolled up sleeve of his blue shirt: "I'll take that as a I came because you asked and I listened for once." The exchange, obviously, didn't go unnoticed by his brother and Jesse, which made you sit upright suddenly: "Tommy was the one who was gonna break his wrist anyways..."

"Nobody gets to disturb anyone here, especially right in front of me," He said and slid a glass to his brother.

Jesse joined in: "I doubt it, but should he ever-"

"Aw, you guys are spoiling me," You grinned and waved your hand down, pressing the other onto your chest.

----J

You looked beautiful. You were wearing a plain, dark green, mid-thigh, flare skirt; which could pass as a miniskirt, but Joel was no fashion expert. You always did come up with the rarest clothing items (like your sports set that morning), so he wasn't surprised that you happened across the skirt. You also had a simple, white, v-neck t-shirt on- which all in all was the reason you left Joel speechless: You could be wearing something as simple as these, but you'd still look so damn pretty.

A few minutes later, after Jesse and Tommy disappeared in different directions and you were finally left alone, Joel spoke up: "Is this the-"

"What made you-" You gave each other a brief look before chuckling: "You go first."

"Ah, I was gonna ask if this was the outfit you wanted me to see," He said, briefly looking down to point at your skirt.

He watched you run a hand through your hair and bite your bottom lip before answering: "Yeah..." You got up and stuffed your hands in your pockets, which made Joel's heart sizzle. "What do you think?"

He gave you a genuine smile: "I think you look beautiful."

The shock on your face made Joel panick a little, but when you offered a shy little smile, he relaxed: "You- Really?"

He gave you a single, slow nod in acknowledgement, his smile grew bigger when you beamed at him and offered him a quiet thank you, then sat back. You were staring hard at your glass, clearly avoiding his gaze and he found it rather cute, but didn't comment on it.

He was looking forward to chat with you, after all, you were the reason why he showed up, but you were unfortunately dragged away by a couple of friends, Jesse included...

To dance.

An upbeat song he didn't recognise started playing, putting you and another boy, Mick, to action. Everyone backed away to give you two space, then started off with what seemed to be something you'd been practicing for a while. You mirrored each other's moves, it was similar to some folk dance he'd watched way before the outbreak, but it most definitely wasn't a folk dance. Your arms linked occasionally, hands on your hips as you crossed each other's legs with fast movements and other types of moves Joel couldn't name if he tried, but it was organised and fun to watch. It wasn't intimate, too, just a silly little dance as you called it minutes later when you finished and walked to the bar for a drink. You didn't stay long, though, just downed your drink, winked at him and went back to the stage where you and Mick (but mostly you) stole the show.

It went on for two more rounds, to the point your t-shirts were absolutely soaked and your legs couldn't take it anymore. Joel had a particularly hard time in his seat, watching your skirt float around your thighs made him feel embarrassed with himself. Tommy even went as far as to tease him about his constant squirming, but a glare from his older brother was enough to shut him up.

The last dance finished off with you in Mick's arms, leaning back in his hold and closing your eyes with laughter. Everyone clapped you both, which earned you a kiss on the cheek from Mick- which you returned. Joel's jaw clenched unintentionally, even though you and him didn't appear to be more than friends.

Stop. Stop it, you idiot.

He couldn't care less about these types of things, drama about who's dating who and whatnot, but when it came to you he naturally grew curious.

He watched you, eyelids struggling to keep themselves open as Jesse led you and helped you onto the stool, next to Joel once more. You huffed and giggled, eyes closed with sweat droplets on your forehead. He couldn't help it when his smile grew wider at your tipsy state.

What he didn't see coming was the sudden hand on his thigh and your back against his arm, letting your head drop onto his shoulder as you let out a brief laugh: "Never let me dance and drink at the same time again."

Joel didn't know what to say, he quickly looked around for Jesse only to find him already gone and a couple of people staring at the both of you. With a rush of panic, he responded: "I don't think I'm the one you should say that to, darlin'."

Your hand and the rest of your body immediately retreated when you jumped at his voice: "Joel?!" You looked a little embarrassed and he couldn't help but smirk. "Uh, where's Jesse?"

The question almost made him scrunch up his face, but he patiently waited until the end of the conversation, which was after you've walked away to find the boy in question and he was alone with his own thoughts... Jealousies...

"He dropped you off and went over there, I think." Joel nodded to the direction he thought Jesse went off to - he didn't see though, he was too busy focusing on you when your fingertips had brushed somewhere dangerously near his crotch.

"Huh," You stared around to find him, but Joel figured you were too intoxicated to actually see that far. "You need to stop wearing the same clothes."

He raised a brow at that: "You tell him that."

"Oh I will," You grinned mischievously and suddenly grabbed Joel's glass of whiskey from his hand, then downed it at one go before he could intervene.

"Hey!" He tried to grab the glass from you but you leaned back. "I think you've had enough for the night."

"Says who-?" You pouted and at the very same time, lost your balance, realising that you leaned a little too back. However, Joel caught you; one hand on your arm, the other on your waist and he pulled you back - he didn't know if you did it purposefully, but you practically fell into his body: "Oh! I'm sorry-" You laughed, not looking sorry at all. "Thanks, Joel," You purred, extending the 's' and the 'l' at the end of each word as you grabbed onto his biceps. "You saved me."

"Pfft," Joel couldn't help but let his hand linger on your waist as he made sure you stood in place. Your eyes met when you lifted your head from his chest - the meaning behind his hazel gaze and your own was similar and it lasted for what felt like a whole minute, while in reality it was no longer than a few seconds.

You finally let his arms go and he took it as his cue to remove his hand from your waist (which, for a moment, felt like it had been glued there): "So... You enjoying yourself, old man?"

Joel sighed through his nose, amused at how the alcohol in your system was slowing your speech, then went back to how he had been sitting before you came. Just when you asked, the smooth, familiar tune of Ain't No Sunshine started playing. After all the excitement, a slower music felt nice: "Sure. You?"

"Oh I sure am," You nodded and leaned back against the counter with something of a triumphant smile.

"I can tell," Joel replied, then without turning his head, side eyed you. His stare later on moved down to your skirt. "Why'd you get all dressed up for, really?"

"Huh?" You blinked, not processing if he was asking what you thought he was.

"I, uh- just never took you for the skirt type."

"Is that so?" You asked, eyes widening. "Well, just trying on a new outfit..." You looked down and bit your lower lip, making Joel's heart skip a beat. He mentally kicked himself for not leaving right then and there and continuing to talk to you: "There's actually another reason."

"Hm?"

"There's this guy," You turned towards him, placed your arm paralleled across his on the counter and leaned forward a little, pretending to look around. His fingertips scratched against the wooden surface of the counter at the mention of this guy in question. "I don't know his name, but maybe you do?"

He just raised a brow when you looked at him innocently: "He's a bit old, around this tall," Your hand went back and forth in the air as you tried to size the man's height in your mind. "Has pretty, long, graying hair with an also graying beard... A little scar on his nose," You looked at him and leaned in a little more, invading his personal space but not touching him, then pointed at the exact spot on your nose and it was then, Joel realised, that you were indeed describing himself. "He's wearing this blue shirt and, honestly, it would look better on him if he opened another button or two."

I know, I know

Hey I oughta leave young thing alone

But ain't no sunshine when she's gone

He wanted to counter, tease you back, lean down and taste your lips, then place a kiss or two on your neck and bite it softly just to hear you moan quietly into his ear- he also needed to get his shit together, as much as he wanted to do all of that.

He couldn't quite believe his self control when he leaned away from you, especially since the tip of your noses almost touched and he felt your hot breath on his lips. He cleared his throat and quickly looked around to see if anyone was looking- no one had seen the rather intimate interaction so he spoke: "I don't know who that is."

The disappointment on your features was like a knife twisting up in his guts. You blinked a couple of times, but didn't lean back: "S- Sure you do..."

"I don't," Joel insisted, his voice stern. "Maybe you should look for someone else."

Your disappointment turned into embarrassment and anger, making you frown and lean back: "Excuse me."

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone

And this house just ain't no home

Anytime she goes away

And with that, you got up and stormed away, leaving Joel wanting, aching and ashamed.

Anytime she goes away

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blu-joons · 3 years

Text

DATING TXT A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Choi Yeonjun

A ⇴ AFFECTION

Yeonjun loved to tease you with his affection, pushing boundaries was very much a favourite habit of his. His hands would often wonder when he was around you, he couldn’t help himself but try and see where his affection could take him.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING

You already worked at the company before TXT came together, and so the two of you struck up a professional relationship from the start. You always took great care of Yeonjun as a member of staff, but that didn’t stop him always trying to be a little more friendly with you and try to get you know better than the other members of staff.

C ⇴ CONFESSION

After debut and the group took off, Yeonjun was able to settle a lot more. With that, he couldn’t help but find himself desperate to confess to you as you started working with other rookie groups, having less contact with him. One evening he surprised you at the company, desperate to tell you how he felt about you before he lost the chance. You were shocked, naturally, but there was no way you could ever turn Yeonjun down.

D ⇴ DATES

He loved to get quite competitive on dates and make sure that he could show off to you. You’d spend a lot of dates at sports complex or arcades where Yeonjun could show off his strength, but the one thing he loved to do more than anything else was try and teach you to skateboard. Admittedly, you were terrible, but you knew that it was something that Yeonjun was passionate about, and whilst you were yet to take two feet off the ground without him holding firmly onto you, it was only a matter of time before you’d get the hang of things.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE

Having never dated before, there was definitely a moment of apprehensiveness as far as Yeonjun was concerned. He knew as the eldest member he had a bit of an example to set for the other members, and a lot to follow up as the next generation to BTS. However, with your knowledge of the company already, he was confident that a relationship was something that the two of you could enter and make sure that neither of you got hurt. He was always going to protect you, even ahead of work, Yeonjun knew what he wanted in life, and was firmly set on making sure he got everything that he wanted without a bother.

F ⇴ FIGHTING

Whenever the two of you fought, Yeonjun couldn’t help but get quite emotional. You quickly picked up on the fact that he wore his heart on his sleeve a lot, and when he had something to say, he couldn’t help but pour his heart out to you. The frustrations that would trigger an argument between you both would very quickly turn into sadness and hurt that the two of you could speak so harshly to each other and say so much that neither of you ever meant. It didn’t take long for one of you to crack, usually Yeonjun, both soon figuring how pointless an argument was over whatever had caused it, and how much easier it was to just talk.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY

You ended up meeting Yeonjun’s family before you started dating whilst you worked at the company, and so they couldn’t have been happier knowing that Yeonjun had chosen to start dating you too. They trusted you, and knew you understood the company and his line of work, and so he’d definitely be happy with you too.

H ⇴ HOME

Being at the dorm was something you loved, especially with Yeonjun having his own room. The boys loved having you around, which was most definitely a bonus for you. The two of you were still young, and neither of you were willing to rush into getting your own home together when your careers were still your focuses.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”

Yeonjun was the first one to say, ‘I love you,’ suddenly on a date night. He’d taken you bowling, and you were losing, by a lot. As you hit the gutter yet again and spun around with a pout, you sent Yeonjun weak at the knees. Before he’d even thought about his words, a reminder to smile and a quick ‘I love you,’ had been muttered, surprising you greatly.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY

He would definitely be the type of person to hide any jealous feelings that he had, but again, he wears his heart on his sleeve a lot when he finds himself getting emotional, and so it wouldn’t take long for you to pick up on how he was feeling, no matter how hard he tried to hide it around you. You’d often notice that he’d get a little quieter and his cheeks would begin to flush as he tried to hold himself together. He’d deny ever feeling jealous around anyone until eventually you managed to push him into admitting how he felt.

K ⇴ KIDS

The two of you very quickly agreed that you were far too young for children, and that for the foreseeable future you saw yourselves working hard on your careers instead. Yeonjun still had so many ambitions for TXT, and you were making your way up the ladder at Big Hit. You knew there would be time for the two of you to start a family someday, but you had plenty of goals you wanted to achieve before that time came.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER

You loved seeing Yeonjun happy, that was always the most important thing to you. His smile was definitely something that drew you to him, even before the two of you started dating, and even more so since. You knew that he felt the pressure a lot, and there were times when he’d come home with the smile very distant from his face, and so you’d make it your mission to make sure that you found a way to make him smile again. You hated how hard he was on himself, almost as if he wouldn’t allow himself to smile at times, but after a short while with you, he couldn’t help but find himself smiling once again.

M ⇴ MISSING

Being the eldest, he definitely felt a responsibility when it came to missing you. He would try incredibly hard to shrug off any feeling of missing you, but when times were tough, even the mention of your name was enough to make him incredibly emotional. Yeonjun would try and keep things together, but usually after a chat with Soobin, he’d reach his breaking point. It was as if he was a ticking time bomb when it came to missing you, once the tears finally started, it would take a long time for them to stop. Especially, when he called you. You knew each time you hung up the phone that he was going to spend a little while to himself to try and hold it together.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES

You often found yourself calling him ‘junnie.’ It began as a bit of tease when you first met him, however as things changed between you, your jokey nickname for him was something that ended up sticking around.

O ⇴ OBSESSION

He was obsessed with your smile, almost as much as you were with his. He loved to see you happy, just as you always did with him too.

P ⇴ PDA

Yeonjun wasn’t afraid of being affectionate with you in public, but it would always be very subtle. People could often be forgiven for not even realising that the two of you were a couple because you were so conscious of being affectionate and making sure that you didn’t stir up any trouble for yourselves.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS

He would often ask if you were tired whenever you tried to stay up with him. With a yawn, you’d assure him that you were alright, but as soon as your head rested against his shoulder, you’d be out like a light and proving him right.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS

You learnt very quickly that Yeonjun was incredibly chaotic and messy, with meant his room in the dorm was often a tip too. You’d always end up tidying around him and ended up buying him plenty of storage boxes and units so that he could try and keep his mess neat too. Although he’d never use them, and instead throw things on the floor, the thought that you put into sorting them for him meant a great deal to him.

S ⇴ SEX

Every time the two of you were intimate, Yeonjun made sure to treat you as if you were the most delicate thing on earth. Yeonjun prided himself on being a gentleman, especially in the bedroom, always making sure that you were comfortable and satisfied. He never put himself first, he’d always take care of you first and listen to your body closely, picking up on all the hints you gave him as to what you wanted from him.

T ⇴ TEXTS

Throughout the day you’d often get random messages from Yeonjun, usually seeing what you were up to. He loved hearing how your day was going and making sure you were looking forward to seeing him that evening.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE

You were very much a best friend to Yeonjun, and a huge support from the very start of his career. Even before things took off, you were the first one in line to cheer him on, both professionally, but as a partner too.

V ⇴ VACATION

Stories of San Jose had kept you entertained for hours, and so when the opportunity arrived to take a week away from work, there was only ever going to be one place that Yeonjun would take you. He wanted to be able to show you the places where his memories had been made rather than constantly just tell you about them instead.

W ⇴ WHINING

He tended not to whine too much, he appreciated more than anyone when you were busy and was happy to wait around until you had some time free for him.

X ⇴ XXXXX

Whenever Yeonjun was around you, it was very much an instinct to hold onto you and usually press a kiss against your cheek or the nape of your neck. When you were around other people, it was a small gesture he could give to you without having to create a huge fuss about your relationship or make other people uncomfortable. In the comfort of your own home though, he was always more than happy to tease you and push all of the boundaries possible.

Y ⇴ YOU

You were his biggest fan, supporting him in every single thing that he did.

Z ⇴ ZZZ

Yeonjun never slept, a quality about him that you never understood. You’d usually end up having to drag him to bed to make sure that he rested for whatever schedule it was that he had planned for the very next day.

---

Masterlist

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vivacissimx · 2 years

Note

love your blog, writing, and thoughts about asoiaf! do you have any thoughts as to what jon's vivid dreams of his family dying (benjen), that even go so far as to him killing them (ned, robb, ygritte), say about him or his relationships with them?

thanks!!

oh a lot of thoughts lol but let me keep it short (spoilers: I failed)

surface level, Jon's dreams are about his angst about exclusion, his place in Winterfell, and about doing the right thing. I actually love how well these dreams work on multiple levels because the deeper foreshadowing about the coming conflict & R+L=J are all tied together tight. The dream where he kills Ygritte and Robb is in the ADWD chapter where he brings the wildlings through the Wall - he's already rejected Stannis's offer but as we see from his ongoing mentions of it, the inner struggle remains.

I think those dreams are Jon's regular guilt, his survivor's guilt, his anger at facing so many impossible choices (take the Stark name, save the wildlings, send Cotter Pyke to Hardhome, face the ire of the NW leadership) all piling onto each other. Jon's relationship with his family is a complex one:

Robb, his rival and best friend and constant companion

Jon remembered the wish he'd wished in his anger, the vision of Benjen Stark dead in the snow, and he looked away quickly. The dwarf had a way of sensing things, and Jon did not want him to see the guilt in his eyes.

-AGOT, Jon III

When Jon had been very young, too young to understand what it meant to be a bastard, he used to dream that one day Winterfell might be his. Later, when he was older, he had been ashamed of those dreams. Winterfell would go to Robb and then his sons, or to Bran or Rickon should Robb die childless. And after them came Sansa and Arya. Even to dream otherwise seemed disloyal, as if he were betraying them in his heart, wishing for their deaths. I never wanted this, he thought as he stood before the blue-eyed king and the red woman. I loved Robb, loved all of them. . . I never wanted any harm to come to any of them, but it did. And now there's only me.

-ASOS, Jon XI

He feels guilty that he's alive when they're not as he sees them as important and ranking above him, deserving of their place in a way he isn't. The choice of the NW brothers over his blood brothers is one Jon keeps because he made the choice, not because he believes in it wholeheartedly.

Jon Snow straightened himself and took a long deep breath. Forgive me, Father. Robb, Arya, Bran… forgive me, I cannot help you.

-AGOT, Jon IX

"What will you do?" Mormont asked. "Bastard as you are?"

"Be troubled," said Jon, "and keep my vows."

-ACOK, Jon I

Visions of killing them are just an extreme version of what he already feels wrt to them - in Ygritte's case, Jon didn't kill her but she's absolutely dead because of his warning and command. His guilt is understandable but even he sees the necessity of those actions.

But there are more symbolic meanings.

Jon's dreams tie in well with Jaime & Theon's weirwood dreams, along with his dream in ACOK. It begins with Jon's recurring nightmare of Winterfell being empty and him going down to the crypts to look for his father, scared of what he'll find.

Up above he heard drums. They are feasting in the Great Hall, but I am not welcome there. I am no Stark, and this is not my place.

-AGOT, Jon VII

Last night he had dreamed the Winterfell dream again. He was wandering the empty castle, searching for his father, descending into the crypts. Only this time the dream had gone further than before. In the dark he'd heard the scrape of stone on stone. When he turned he saw that the vaults were opening, one after the other. As the dead kings came stumbling from their cold black graves, Jon had woken in pitch-dark, his heart hammering.

-ASOS, Jon VIII

Compared to:

King Robert sat with his guts spilling out on the table from the great gash in his belly, and Lord Eddard was headless beside him. Corpses lined the benches below, grey-brown flesh sloughing off their bones as they raised their cups to toast, worms crawling in and out of the holes that were their eyes. He knew them, every one; Jory Cassel and Fat Tom, Porther and Cayn and Hullen the master of horse, and all the others who had ridden south to King's Landing never to return. Mikken and Chayle sat together, one dripping blood and the other water. Benfred Tallhart and his Wild Hares filled most of a table. The miller's wife was there as well, and Farlen, even the wildling Theon had killed in the wolfswood the day he had saved Bran's life.

But there were others with faces he had never known in life, faces he had seen only in stone. The slim, sad girl who wore a crown of pale blue roses and a white gown spattered with gore could only be Lyanna. Her brother Brandon stood beside her, and their father Lord Rickard just behind. Along the walls figures half-seen moved through the shadows, pale shades with long grim faces. The sight of them sent fear shivering through Theon sharp as a knife.

-ACOK, Theon V

They're the same dream. Winterfell empty of all life, the Kings of Winter awakening. Theon later tells Asha that they're angry, while in Jon's dream they tell him he has no place there.

Yet there came two riders on pale horses, men and mounts both armored. The destriers emerged from the blackness at a slow walk. They make no sound, Jaime realized. No splashing, no clink of mail nor clop of hoof. He remembered Eddard Stark, riding the length of Aerys's throne room wrapped in silence. Only his eyes had spoken; a lord's eyes, cold and grey and full of judgment.

"Is it you, Stark?" Jaime called. "Come ahead. I never feared you living, I do not fear you dead."

Brienne touched his arm. "There are more."

He saw them too. They were armored all in snow, it seemed to him, and ribbons of mist swirled back from their shoulders. The visors of their helms were closed, but Jaime Lannister did not need to look upon their faces to know them.

Five had been his brothers. Oswell Whent and Jon Darry. Lewyn Martell, a prince of Dorne. The White Bull, Gerold Hightower. Ser Arthur Dayne, Sword of the Morning. And beside them, crowned in mist and grief with his long hair streaming behind him, rode Rhaegar Targaryen, Prince of Dragonstone and rightful heir to the Iron Throne.

-ASOS, Jaime VI

To me it's pretty clearly R+L=J foreshadowing (Jaime thinking it's Ned and it's Rhaegar like fuck off George), but it's also about the war with the Others to come. Everyone's dead but everyone's a ghost, the dead rise, the dead are angry, and at the center of it all: the legacy of House Stark, the men who wrangled Winter and locked it behind the Wall.

This is a rushed answer and there's a lot more that could be said but these are my general thoughts on Jon's dreams (excluding the ACOK Bran one which is less of a dream and more of Bran actually doing the damn thing. That has a lot more foreshadowing for Bran & the Bran-Jon relationship than it does for Jon alone imo)

#asks #long post #jon snow #r plus l equals j #theon greyjoy #text #asoiaf

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primalsouls · 3 years

Text

healing kisses

aether x gn! reader

⚠️ : none

theme : fluff

note: first canon character x reader insert fic lol. i don't really normally write stuffs like this because i always feel ill make the characters too ooc... but hope this one do well. still got a few fic ideas in mind for aether and a couple of other characters. :) thank you for reading! <3

⊱ ──────ஓ๑♡๑ஓ ────── ⊰

After finishing the fourth commission of the day, Aether and Paimon made their way back to Mondstadt to collect their rewards from the Guild and visit a friend for another reward, a tasty one the two hoped. The journey to the entrance of the windy city was short, for the last commission happened to be just around the corner, somewhat a few yards away from the bridge. Just a few hilichurls and mitachurls in a camp that needed to be clear off. It is no surprise the young man managed to get hurt, not severely as he thought but some of the wounds did made him wince with every step he took.

"Paimon hopes [Y/N] could make us some delicious snacks! their cooking skill is amazing!" Paimo said excitedly, earning a look from the blonde outlander. "What? It's true! Your cooking skills comes in second place!" Paimon added and it earned her a light chuckle from Aether as he shook his head.

"[Y/N] does make a perfect Sticky Honey Roast." The traveler commented as the pair walked the brigde, trying to be as mindful as they could for Timmie's birds while they passed by him. Paimon nodded with a hungry look on her eyes, mouth already wettering at the thought of the dish. With her small hands pounding the air in an impatient manner and a frown on her face, she turned to Aether with a pout added in.

"C'mon! Let's hurry up! Paimon can't wait no more!" Paimon exclaimed, already floating ahead towards the gate where the two Knights of Favonius stood guarded on each side. Aether let out another laugh before he took off from his walking pace, an apology being thrown over to Timmie for disrupting the birds once again. He raced behind the floating figure he jokingly called Emergency Food, his own heart beating with anticipation to see his good friend [Y/N], ignoring the amount of sharp pains his body received with each hurried step. Aether waved at the guards before stepping within the city walls. Paimon glared lightly as the traveler as she watched him reached the Guild's stand, a tiny foot tapping the air rapidly, her hands on each side of her waist. "C'mon, c'mon! Paimon's stomachs is getting grumpy!" Paimon told him, hands thrown up in the air to further push her point. Aether rose a brow at the mention of stomachs, still wondering about their conversation of what was weirder from a long ago.

"Okay, okay... Why don't you go wait by [Y/N]'s place and I'll meet you there?" Aether proposed as he turned to Katherine and gave her a quick smile and greetings. He didn't have to wait for Paimon's response as she already disappear from his sight. Sighing tiredly, he looked at the young man, his smile still in place. "Katherine, hello. I'm finished with today's commissions." He said, patiently waiting for the rewards Katherine was about to bring out.

Paimon flew a bit around Mondstadt, grinning widely as [Y/N]'s house came into view. She quickly headed to the front of the house. Paimon looked around for the [color]-haired individual, spotting them nowhere outside their home. Appearing in front of the door, Paimon knocked on the surface as loud as she could, stopping when it flew opened. The grin widen at the sight of her and the traveler's friend.

"[Y/N]! Hi! Paimon's happy you're home!" The floating being said with a bright smile. [Y/N] chuckled at Paimon. Their eyes scanned around the area, standing aside to let her in.

"Hey there, Paimon? Where's Aether?" They asked, closing the door behind themselves. Paimon explained Aether's whereabouts, following [Y/N] to the kitchen where a few plates of snacks where already prepared. "Ah, then it shouldn't take him long to get here." They said with a shrug. Paimon nodded, her eyes shined with glee at the delicious snacks she could smell from her place.

"Yup! And it seem you already got us ready with the goodies! It's like you knew we were coming! What are you? What's that power?" Paimon rambled as she grabbed a Mondstadt Hash Brown from one of the plates. [Y/N] shook his head with a giggle escaping past his lips.

"I just had a hunch you two would stop by. Guess I was right." They replied, blinking when another knock sounded from the door. He walked out of the kitchen, letting Paimon enjoyed the snacks. When he reached the door, another knock came through. Already with the person in mind, [Y/N] opened the door, their smile growing on their face when they saw Aether... slouching slightly with a pained look on his face. Their eyes finally took in Aether's state, eyes widening a bit. "Aether! Oh my Archons, what happened?" They asked as he helped them in. Aether waved his hand dismissively, chuckling a bit.

"Tis nothing but a scratch." The blonde man said with a shrug. Paimon poker her head out of the kitchen, wondering what was all the commotion about. She raised a brow at Aether's arm swing over the other's shoulders, looking like he was in pained. She rose a brow, her head tilted to the side.

"Scratch? It's more than a scratch! You got cuts here and there. And it made look like a small gash, but it is still more than a scratch." [Y/N] frowned, sitting Aether down on the couch. "Stay here, I'll go some stuffs to bandage you up." With no reply, [Y/N] headed to their bathroom, a small yet concern frown on their face. Once [Y/N] was out of sight and earshot, Paimon flew over to Aether.

"What are you doing? You're not that hurt!" Paimon said, her hands on her waist. Aether hushed at her, looking behind him to make sure [Y/N] didn't hear them speak.

"I know, I know... but... I like it when [Y/N] take cares of me... Their touches are so soft and gentle." Aether whispered, smiling longigly at the thought of [Y/N]'s hands brushing up against his skin. Paimon gave him a look before putting the pieces together.

"Oooh~! Someone's got a crush!" Paimon exclaimed as she floated around Aether who waved his hands to quiet down but it was a bit late, [Y/N]'s footsteps could already be heard.

"Who has a crush on who?" They asked, their head cocking to one side as they rounded the couch to seat in front of the outlander on the coffee table. Aether's cheeks were tained in a rosy color, clearing his throat as he and Paimon exchanged looks.

Paimon shrugged, shaking her head as she tried to come up with an excuse. Aether only scratched the back of his head, looking around to stop their friend from looking at the small blush on his cheeks.

"Um... J-Jean! Jean has a... uh, cru-crush on Master Diluc!" Paimon stuttered out and glanced back at the traveler. "R-right, Aether!?" Aether nodded eagerly, wanting to skip the topic already. [Y/N] rose a brow at the false gossip, nodding slowly as they opened the wooded med kit sat in their lap.

"Jean crushing on Master Diluc? Really?" [Y/N] muttered in disbelief, not believing the two but let it slide. Paimon and Aether only nodded, watching [Y/N] take out a roll of bandage. Paimon let the two alone, feeling more hungry than ever. As the two sat in silence, Aether's eyes studied the [hair color] Anemo user. He studied how gentle they tried to be with his wounds, mindful to not press to hard to cause him the wince in pain. It brought a small smile to the traveler's face, the blush he thought was long gone reappeared faintly across his cheeks. He let out a whine when alcohol was rub the last wound, alerting [Y/N]. "Oh, I'm sorry! You're okay?" They asked softly, [eye color] eyes locking with golden-yellow eyes. It took the blonde a minute to respond, having to be lost in their eyes. "Aether?"

Snapping out of it, said man nodder quickly, looking away to hide his ever-growing blush.

"Yeah, yeah... I'm okay. It j-just took me off guard." He said, giving [Y/N] an awkward smile. The individual chuckled as they finished up wrapping the wound, bringing Aether's arm out and closer to their personal space. Their soft lips pressed a light kiss on top of the bandaged area. Such gesture made Aether's heart run a mile over and over. He was sure the blush gotten redder and up to the point of his ears. "W-what?" He stuttered, unsure how to react. Part of him was taken aback by the gesture, the other part panicked as many thoughts ran through his head about the meaning of the gesture.

"My mom used to kiss all my cuts away whenever I get hurt. Said a kiss heals any wounds." [Y/N] explained, smiling fondly at the memories that crossed their mind. Without thinking, Aether pointed at his lips.

"You forgot this wound then." He stated out without a second thought. The words caught [Y/N] off guard, their own cheeks dusted with the same rosy blush that matched almost woth Aether. Their eyes widen in surprise. Aether even caught on into his own words, immediately stuttering out an apology as he tried to come up with a different excuse, but before any words were let out, he felt a pair of smooth hands cup his cheeks and pulled him closer, his lips meeting up with [Y/N]'s in a quick yet sweet kiss. Pulling away, both of them had their blush reddened like a Jueyun Chili all over their face.

"Well, t-there you go... All healed up." [Y/N] started off, eyes casted down at their hands. Aether, now filled up with a bit more confidence, took [Y/N]'s hands in his own.

"I don't think they're healed. They still hurt." To 'prove' his point, he guided the other's hand and lightly tap their fingertips against his lip, acting out a wince of pain. [Y/N] let out a genuine laugh, shaking their head at the outlander's tactics. Aether joined in, their bands still in his, intertwined together.

Paimon sighed as she finished off the last plate, blinking when she heard laughter coming from the living room. Peaking her head out, she grinned widely at the view of Aether and [Y/N] smiling lovingly at each other, chuckling here and there about the traveler's little tactic to get another kiss on the lips from the Anemo wielder. It was about time for the two of them to get together, afterall.

...

"So, was it you who has a crush on me?"

"... Yeah..."

"Heh, such a cutie."

#genshin impact #genshin impact x male reader #genshin impact x gender neutral reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x female reader #x gender neutral reader #x male reader #x female reader #x reader #genshin impact aether #aether x gender neutral reader #aether x male reader #aether x female reader #aether x reader #primal writes

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argumentl · 3 years

Text

The Freedom of Expression Ep 58 - [NSFW] The truth behind the DIR EN GERY misprint, and a mysterious voice...

K: Hi, this is Dir en grey's Kaoru, with this week's episode of the Freedom of Expression. Joe, Tasai, welcome...Um..

T: Ah!

J: What is it?

T: No way!

K: Its 'Young Jump'

J: Ah, Young Jump.

K: I think you already know about this, but we put an ad on it like this *shows back page*.

J: Oh, looks great!

T: Yeah, it does. Very impactful.

K: Its good, isn't it?

T: Yeah, great impact.

K: There's something a bit odd about it.

J: Haha

T: Huh? Where?

J: Eh? Something odd?

K: Yeah, its a bit strange. There's a bit of a mistake.

J: Is the kanji for Oboro correct?

K: Yeh, and this is right, about the release on the 28th of April.

J: And Wenesday is correct, right?

K: Yeah, and the explosion screening schedule is ok.

T: Yeah, it is.

K: The ticket price info is also all fine.

J: Yep.

K: After that there's only this bottom section.

J:Yeah.

T: DIR EN...

T, J: GERY, haha.

J: Has a new band formed?

K: We screwed up.

J, T: Hahaha

K: Its hard to believe, right?

J: Incredible. I did not expect this..Dir en gery.

T: I thought it was like a trick or something.

J: Oh, to make it go viral or..?

T: Yeah, going with Dir en gery.

J: Kaoru, what was it?

T: We'll find out about it here.

K: It was a total mistake.

J, T: Hahaha

J: Seriously? Eh? Really?

K: Yeah.

T: Does that mean it was done on a hurry, if its a seroius mistake?

K: Yeah, I guess so.

J: Well, Tasai, you work for a newspaper, and I also work for Rolling Stone, so we understand this, but our work is handed in for checking, you know, proof-reading. And they do spot mistakes, but honestly, I have never seen mistake of this size before.

T: Yeh. This is at the level of 'accident'. However, there is a case for saying that we cannot attack this. What I mean by that is that we too make mistakes.

J: Yes, thats true. There is that. Well, this goes for magazines etc too, but if you do proof-reading within the organization, for example, if the writer writes an article, the editor will proof-read it, and they may intend to, but if everyone is really busy with loads of other work, they will run out of time. Then they will get it checked by an external proof-reader. Even then there are sometimes still typos left over.

T: Yeah, there are.

J: There are, right? Human error happens.

T: Yeah, like if I misspell a name or something, I can correct it on the digital version, but on paper it appears on every copy out there.

J: Yeah..

K: But like this?!

J: Yeah, we say this, but we've never seen a typo this bad. Like, I've mistaken small details in names and stuff before.

K: Yeah, like Young Jump becoming Young JumP, right?

J, T: Yeh, haha.

K: Not like this! *points to 'GERY'*

J: Haha, this is...

*Sound of strange voice occurs in background - On screen text: 'What was that voice?! One more time.. (Clip of strange voice re-plays) No-one during the filming heard this. Its a mystery voice'*

J: Tell us what happened?

T: Yeah, lets ask.

K: Um, we had the design made, and the designer made the regular logo and put it down here in this fixed spot, so it looked as if the logo was done, even though there was a mistake in it. At the time, I wasn't looking at the band name, I was looking at the overall design, and ths impact it had. Like this image of Kyo from RokumaykanGIG. My eyes were drawn to the best parts of the design. It wasn't really designed to emphasize the band name. Its designed to showcase this top part, so I, like, didn't see it. Die didn't even see it, and he normally checks these really carefully. Even if we miss something, he normally spots it straight away.

J: Ah, even Die didn't notice it! ???*1

K: Yeah. We were too busy checking that there were no mistakes in the tour schedule.

J: Yeah.

K: But the information is all correct, so if its just the band name with a mistake, well, maybe its ok.

T: This could become a really rare item in time to come.

J: Yeah, cause there isn't gonna be a misspelling with Dir en grey again after this. That point will be strengthened.

K: Not for a while yeah. A long time ago, we had a single out called 'Filth', and there was a mistake in the title of the song on the cover jacket.

T: Eh? So this is the second time this has happened to you?

K: Well...yeh.

T: Hahaha

K: Well, we occasionally make small mistakes *2, but...

T: This is big.

J: Can I suggest something? Good things come in threes.

K: Ah, terrible.

J: So there will be a third time to come, imagine it, it could be both the title and the band name with a mistake.

T: Hahaha

K: Well, what can I do about it now? If you buy the single 'Filth' even now, its still like that. So filth is spelled f-i-l-h..huh? h-f...um, it's..

T: ..t-h

K: f-i-l-t-h, but the i became f, I mean h. So because there were two h's I realised the mistake. If there really is only one h, it could be that they just made the letters look in that style, but they look the same to me.

T: Ehh? I want to line Filth up next to this magazine.

J: Yeah

J, K: Hahaha

T: Don't you have it here? Filth?

K: We do.

T: Lets put them out together!

K: When I saw this (*Young Jump*) though, well, I thought it was quite rare*3, it could become a talking point. If you take a bad thing in a smooth way, someone will notice, so I thought we could just go with it.

J: Brilliant!

K: And then I posted on Twitter, like 'Ooops'. And that was a photo of the actual magazine, so it really was like 'ooops'.

T: As soon as I saw your Tweet, I was like 'Huh?!' and I went to the convenience store and bought it. haha

J: Well, in that sense it is a rare item

T: Can we decide on the correct reading for this? How would you say it?

K: Ge-ri?

J: Dir en gery (ge-ri).

K: jeri? geri?

J: geri? jeri?

T: gari?

J: Its geri, right? Well, jeri is like..

K: In the basic form its geri, right?

J: Yeah. jeri might have to be 'Gerry' with two r's. Which is best Dir en jeri or Dir en geri?

T: Should we decide? Even though it doesn't really matter.

J: Yeah

J: Dir en geri sounds like a struggling country rock artist or something, haha. Dir en jeri has jellyfish vibes.

T: The official name: Dir en Gery (jeri). haha.

J: I want you guys to do a joke live show as Dir en gery. You could switch parts, like Kaoru, you could be on drums.

K: Ah, but we did kinda do that once, we changed parts on stage. I just made a load of noise.

J: Ahh, so you could do that as Dir en gery somewhere officially and play one song.

T: Ahh, thats a good idea.

J: Do a cover or something.

T: You could do ???*4

K: Er, no. haha.

J: Haha, this will getting bigger and bigger.

T: But I heard recently at the MeguroRokumaykanGIG screening, Kyo said that Toshiya used to play guitar a long time ago.

K: He was playing guitar the first time we saw him playing in a band...well, I don't know if he was playing it, or just waving it around a lot.

T: Yeah, Kyo said the stage was going wild.

K: Yeah, he wasn't playing.

J: So, when you guys switched instruments on stage, what did you do Kaoru?

K: Drums.

J: Oh, drums?

K: Thats the one I wanna try out the most.

J: So if you guys played as Dir en gery, Kaoru, you would be..?

T: Drums?

K:...Nah....*imitates playing the castanets*

J: Tambourine? Oh, castanets? So, it doesn't necessarily have to be the same instruments you play at the moment?

K: Yeah. As long as we play as a proper band.

J: Yeah, so Kyo could play the recorder..

T: Someone could hit the ???*5

J: Yeah, yeah. Oh, that would be good.

*The single Filth gets passed over*

K: I'll just get it out.

*K shows cover jacket to J*

J: Oh, here, right?

K: Can you see, there are two h's.

J: Yes. I see.

*K shows it to T*

J: The first h is a typo?

K: Yeah.

T: Its a bit difficult to spot though.

K: We didn't even notice, we thought it was just the design.

J: Yeah. Put them together now.

*K puts magazine and CD together*

J, T: Hahaha

K: By the way, it was the same person who designed both of these.

J, T: Haha

K: When he saw it he was so pained.

T: Its ok, ???*6

J: Ahh, well, it can't be helped though.

*On screen note: Again? (weird voice appears)*

J: Even if there is a spelling mistake, its conveying the atmosphere that is the main thing.

K: Yeah, thats the emphasis.

J: But on the other hand, you could say that as soon as 'Dir' appears, people recognise it as Dir en grey, even with this kind of misspelling. The name is that well know.

T: Hmm, yeh

K: Hm, well, yeh, if you look at it up to here. But for us, its impossible.

J: Well, I guess yeah. It goes for Rolling Stones too. For example, if the last n in Rolling Stones became an m, you wouldn't immediately spot it. If it came up all of a sudden, you would just think 'Ah, the Stones'. It's that kind of name recognition. You could see it in that way. But I didn't know it was the same designer who did it both times.

K: Our boss was pretty mad about it.

J, T: Hahaha

J: Really? I see.

K: He couldn't believe it.

J: Well, yeah. Its also the most important part.

T: Well, yeah, and cause its already in circulation.

J: Yeah. Well, everyone can keep it as a treasure.

K: Where's Kami?

J: Yeah, isn't he here?

Kami: Oh, Im here, I was just listening the whole time. People make mistakes, right?

T: They do.

Kami: This is just a mistake. So its wrong to point blame.

T, J: Yes.

J: Kami, have you made a mistake recently or something?

Kami: Im always making mistakes, and always getting into trouble.

J, T: Haha

Kami: As soon as you've made a mistake, it hurts, right?

T: Yeah, I know that feeling.

Kami: Yeah.

J: Yeah, the person who made the mistake knows it, you don't have to tell them.

T: Yeah, that hurts the most.

Kami: I bet if you made a mistake like this though, you'd get into big trouble.

T, K: Haha

Kami: I think you really would.

T: Well, heh, yeah. But if even Die overlooked this..its like a demon interferred..

J: Yeah, unbelievable.

K: But, anyway, Im taking it in a good way. Well, I mean, it's not good to take just any old thing in a positive way, but....its a bit like those remarks by Mori that we discussed recently.

J: Oh yeah.

K: Like how to move on with it.

J: Yeah, we can learn from that.

K: Yeah.

*Sound cuts out. On screen note: Suddenly, we were unable to record to voices. Was it linked to that sound we heard earlier?*

K: Um, the sound..

J: It seems as if the sound went off.

T: I wonder whether its to do with what we just talked about?

K: What, like, 'Stop this conversation?'

J: Haha, like from ths designer's perspective...'Please stop it!'

T: Haha, yeah, 'Please!'

J: So, what about the Oboro single?

K: So, we're at the last stage, just the mastering, and a little more discussion, and we're about finished. And then the packaging. Well, there's just a little bit longer till the 28th, about another month.

J: Well, Im looking forward to it.

K: Ok, lets finish here for this week. Thank you.

*On screen note: The voice that no-one, including the staff, heard during recording was recorded into the mic data.*

*1,4,5,6 Couldn't catch

*2, 3 Not entirely sure

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#dir en grey #the freedom of expression #tfoe #kaoru #薫

23 notes · View notes

teeztheflag · 3 years

Text

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Ateez! Reaction to getting intimidate with you while the members/ a member are/is in the same room

warnings: some of them behave like fu*kboys/di*kheads, argument, disrespect, alcohol, strong language, suggestive, teasing, doing unholy things in a church

a/n: this turned out so dumb I am sorry anon but I finished it lmfao also they’re more like teasing? because I cannot get my head into people fu*king in front of others and not caring about it 😂

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k i m h o n g j o o n g

Hong Joong always has been a mixture of someone who liked to show off his girl and keep her to himself so you weren’t really shocked when he started to kiss down your exposed neck at a gathering at their mansion that night.

First you were really flustered and giggled but the sexual tension quickly arose when he took a good hold on your hips from behind breathing hotly down your cleavage.

You gulped unsure of what to think about the situation and gasped when you saw Park Seong Hwa standing at the other end of the room a glass of wine in his hand and a mischievous smile on his face.

Was he watching you?

You frowned trying to stop Hong Joong in his motions but quickly realized that he already saw the other one seemingly enjoying the scene.

You turned around and hurt took over your features.

„I am not a cheep whore Kim Hong Joong. Whatever you and Seong Hwa have going on don’t ever dare to involve me in it again.“ You hissed out trying to push away the tears and stormed away.

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p a r k s e o n g h w a

Seong Hwa‘s birthday was known to be the biggest event of the year in his hometown. As the bachelor always threw the most outrageous and glamorous parties it was his friends this time that wanted to prepare something special.

They booked you: a student with little to no money but good dancing skills on the pool.

You started your show and even if Seong Hwa first wasn’t into the idea at all while he sat down in front of you on a single chair the moment he layed his eyes on you his heart skipped a beat.

You personated everything the young rich loved; you were so beautiful he got flustered and tried to hide his reddening cheeks.

The dress on you was way too short and the show went on with the cheering from his guests that the young bachelor zoned out completely by now. He felt himself shuddering and becoming nervous when the young lady started walking to him with confident steps but a deer like gaze.

You sat down on his lap your arms casually wrapping around his shoulders and he cursed lowly at the sweet scent you gave off when you leaned down to whisper in his ear.

„Happy Birthday, Mr. Park.“

You were about to dance on him when he stopped you in your tracks and you were panicking if you did something wrong. Seong Hwa looked you into the eyes and clenched his teeth.

„I swear you don’t know what you’re doing to me right now so stop.“

„Y - you’re joking, right?“ But the desperate look in his eyes told he was more than serious about this.

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j e o n g y u n h o

You just couldn’t look away. It was always something you wondered about. And not only you... definitely your whole circle of friends.

You really didn’t want to look but your gaze just seemed to magically find its way down to Yun Ho‘s crotch where - wait a sec. Is it what you think it is?

Gosh, you had a drink too much. When you looked up you weren’t really sure anymore if this was the reality but on the other side of the room on the couch Yun Ho caught your gaze and suppressed a smirk.

Since it was embarrassing you quickly averted your gaze back to the movie hoping the two of you would just forget about the incident.

„Another round? I am getting shots!“ The others agreed and you got slightly nervous when Yun Ho came back with a tablet and handed everyone a shot.

„I am suggesting brother shots because we’ve all been so busy lately!“

„Why do you sat down next to (y/n), then? Very calculated don’t you think.“ Jong Ho eyed the latter suspiciously and Yun Ho sent him a kiss.

You were so dizzy that you were thinking about what brother shots were again when Yun Ho already linked your arms and drank. Right in the moment you remembered he already placed a cherry tasting kiss on your lips.

You couldn’t hold yourself back to lick the remaining droplets off while Yun Ho watched you eagerly.

„How does it taste?“

You frowned at him still progressing what a wasted night this was. Suddenly Yun Ho wipes away the last droplets off with his thumb and brushes it also over you bottom lip.

Your mouth opens but no words seem to leave your lips while he smiles mischievously.

„G-good... too good.“

„Ah, you want another one?“

You debate and your gaze drifts to the others around you but they seem much too intoxicated themselves to notice.

„Yes.“ Yun Ho chuckles and you close your eyes waiting for his lips to finally touch yours again. When a cold material instead meets you your eyes shoot open and you see Yun Ho laughing at you.

„I meant another shot, (y/n).“ He winks and you roll your eyes pouting at him for getting the wrong ideas...

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k a n g y e o s a n g

Yeo Sang‘s family and yours were good friends since ages and it was a must to attend the sunday‘s service together.

Like usually your families sat next to eachother again but Yeo Sang tended to sit next to his friends in the last row this day. Just when you went up to get to your parents a voice stopped you.

„(y/n)! Come sit with us!“ You turn around and see San smiling at you and also the other boys were together. You just grew close to them a while ago and you didn’t see a reason to say no.

When you realized Woo Young made place for you between him and Yeo Sang your mood quickly changed. You frowned at the boy exactly knowing what you told him a month ago when you were drunk - that you had a crush on Yeo Sang since forever...

Problem was... Yeo Sang probably has been asexual or simply ignoring you for his own sake. As you expected he didn’t even greet you but just relaxed further into the bench.

The service started and the boys next to you seemed to fall asleep one after another while the priest was really into his game. You also weren’t the biggest fan of it but you knew how to be respectful.

It was time to pray with your eyes closed when you suddenly tense up. Your eyes immediately shoot open and your gazes drifts to the site where Yeo Sang is watching you intensely.

You are frozen and not able to move a muscle while he digs his hand further into your tigh. You quickly look around to see if someone notices but stop when you hear a giggle coming from right next to you from Woo Young.

Yeo Sang starts to draw slow circles into your skin and you recognize how warm his hand feels against your exposed flesh. You don’t know how to put it but your body tells you to invite his touches rather than scold him and retrieve his hand...

When he leans down you flinch and close your eyes uttering the last words of the prayer hoping to not die at how hard your heart beats against your ribcage.

His breath tickles the hairs on your neck and you can smell a strong perfume coming from him before he whispers.

„(y/n)... you’re a little whore squirming like this in a church...“

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s o n g m i n g i

„Well, a bet is a bet.“

„Min Gi, you aren’t serious about this? I thought it was a joke! If I knew you would be a dick I wouldn’t have obliged!“

Min Gi let’s out a laugh and drags you back inside the karaoke room where your friends were partying like there’s no tomorrow.

He sat you down next to him and brought his arm over your shoulder to keep you close so you couldn’t escape. He side glanced your form and smiles to see your arms crossed and a pout adorning your face.

„Cute.“

„What?“

„Oh, nothing. Just enjoying the view.“ His eyes turn into crescents while he grins at you.

Times flies by and you know your boyfriend good enough that he wouldn’t let his price slip. So when your food arrives everyone gasps when you start to feed Min Gi like he was the king of South Korea.

„Damn, what the heck are you two doing?“

Some couldn’t control their laughter and you feel like sinking into a hole of embarrassment when Min Gi explains that you just realized how he should be really treated.

Everyone knew you were sassy and didn’t take any shit and so it has also been with your boyfriend. Min Gi loved to tease you endlessly and he knew that having you serve him in front of your friends was something you wouldn’t like. He took it as a revenge for you making him jelous the last week and a dangerous glint appears in his eyes thinking back to the evening.

„Mh, my love. I have some sauce on my chin...“

„So what?“

„Lick it away.“

„You are unbelievable!“

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c h o i s a n

San always has been an affectionate person that needed a lot of attention from his s/o. You on the other hand liked to stick to simple holding hands in public and a little peck here or there but nothing too exaggerated.

San knew you were shy but sometimes he couldn’t hold himself back to tease you openly so people would see who you belong to. No, that wasn’t the only reason he liked to show off he was just fully engulfed in your form and needed to touch whenever he could.

This caused you scolding him from time to time when he did inappropriate things in the different areas.

For example in a car. With Jong Ho and Seong Hwa in the back. You were standing at a red light when you felt San‘s hand sneaking up your thigh leaving a tickling sensation in the process. The boys were tired but you were sure they were still awake in the back.

Quickly you try to retrieve San‘s hand but his grip just strengthens and the nerve this boy has! When you glance to him he’s just sheepishly looking outside acting like he does nothing. He always messed with you inside his car but this time it was worse because there were your friends in the back!

„San!“ You whisper-yell to your boyfriend who looks up to you for a second before leaning in to your side.

„What?“

„Stop!“

„No!“ Then he leans back and when you try to forcefully pull his hand back you’re suddenly with a clap to your thigh leaving you flushed and aroused because of the mixture of pain and pleasure.

„Mh... are we already there?“ Oh, Jong Ho probably actually fell asleep.

„Five minutes.“ San ignites with a big smile to the back.

After you drop off the two San suddenly locks the car and leans over so his arm is around the lean of your seat. Out of reflex you lean back clearly intimidated by his posture but also confused what he wanted to do now.

„Did it hurt, baby?“

You shyly nod and your gaze falls to your lap where you’re playing with the hem of your skirt. San’s tongue pokes out to wetten his bottom lip and a low chuckle leaves him.

„Can you whine like that for me again when we’re home?“

„San!“

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j u n g w o o y o u n g

Jung Woo Young meant danger; that’s what everyone knew. You couldn’t deny the fact that he intrigued you beyond everything that was appropriate... meaning you fantasized about the boy way too much. Everything about him was perfect.

If you just could have a taste of his lips once in your life... It was just a little joke and daydreaming for you; nothing serious. And maybe his image also helped you to relieve some stress in lonely nights but really nothing more.

Although you didn’t expect this houseparty to be too spectacular things actually spiced up when you saw the boy and his friends entering the party. You suddenly felt more excited and thanked god you decided to join your friends this night.

You saw Woo Young quickly being accompanied by a girl and immediately your face fell. Dammit... Just stop dreaming of somebody you will never have!

„(y/n)?“ Oh, yes! You were currently playing beerpong and it was your turn. Well, if you didn’t get the boy you would at least just win this game. And you did. With a big crowd around you the other girls cheering for you because you won against the best of the boys in this game.

With a big grin and clearly tipsy by now you dragged your friend inside to dance accompanied by the others. You swayed your hips, laughed and had a lot of fun. Until you felt someone’s hand sneaking around your waist to level your rhythm up to his.

You turned around and saw no other than the Jung Woo Young eyefucking you shameless.

„What are you doing?“

„Getting revenge for my friend; but in my own way.“

You look over to Yeo Sang the one you just managed to destroy and see him winking at you from afar.

Your eyes quickly drift to Woo Young’s chest and you mumble to yourself. „This would be more like a prize...“

Woo Young is able to hear your words because instead of you he didn’t touch a single bottle tonight and because of that he decides to take things a little further. Suddenly the boy leads you out of the crowd upstairs to a secluded room where he’s quickly placing hungry kisses over your exposed collarbone.

You’re feeling like paralyzed both of the boldness and the pleasure.

Your eyes open wide when you hear a chuckle coming from the other side of the room and you frown seeing Yeo Sang sitting casually in a chair enjoying the show.

„Like you said. Your prize and our revenge.“

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c h o i j o n g h o

Another one of those boring business nights with Jong Ho and you were quickly deciding to roam around the big mansion you landed in this time.

Gosh, how rich was his boss again? This house looked more like a palace to you and made you again wonder; what the hell was Jong Ho even working?

You turned corner after corner and whined knowing you got lost.

„Dammit... I am so stupid!“

„Here you are. Mrs. Choi we‘re missing your presence!“

Choi san comes out of the dark with a smile on his face and a hand tugged into his pockets. He looked ravishing but you guessed he already knew that by the way he always held himself. For you, San was a friend. A good one because he helped you and your husband in more than one way.

You puffed out some air and rolled your eyes. „What could be so interesting that you would need me?“

„Tsk, always so sassy... Jong Ho is currently leading in the game you should join us.“

„How much?“

„That’s for you to find out.“ A chuckle leaves you and with quick steps you get to San and link arms so he can guide you back.

The room was dark and huge with a single poker table in the middle where only three very young and dangerously looking gentlemen were still deeply engulfed into the game. Woo Young who stands next to the table winks at you and you try to hide the uneasiness he’s causing you every time with his little flirt attempts.

Hong Joong and Yun Ho still played with Jong Ho and being the bold human you were you emerged the table with confident steps and sat down on Jong Ho‘s lap to make your presence very clear to everyone.

Jong Ho immediately maneuvered his hands so he could sneak one of his arms around your waist and adjust your position; what the hell...

You were practically sitting widespread on his right thigh now but Jong Ho only seemed to be interested in the game.

They played silently while the others were casually getting drinks from the bar. You on the other hand were busy in understanding the game and Jong Ho‘s cards. You shuffled your body and position from time to time trying to not put too much pressure on your husband‘s thigh.

After a while with a lot of struggling Jong Ho groaned out annoyed and gave your hip a squeeze only to push you down on his thigh stronger than before.

„Fuck!“

All eyes were on you immediately and you know you shouldn’t have teased him so much...

„You want to distract me or put on a show for my friends?“

You were flustered beyond everything and just looked down to hide the embarrassment. „Neither.“

„Neither what?“

„Neither, sir.“ It was only a whisper but everyone clearly heard the word coming out of your mouth.

Jong Ho smiles triumphantly at the others knowing he not only won the game when he shows his cards but also that he would teach you a lesson in a few minutes.

#ateez reactions #ateez writing #ateez smut

195 notes · View notes

kelieah · 4 years

Text

was it worth it? (peter parker x reader)

request (summary) @annamckayla : Hello, ur amazing! I wanted to request an Imagine where the reader and Peter are married with a bby, and after every mission she could be like "was it worth it" (in a kind playful way) and each time he would say yes, but one day the reader is somehow muddled up in this dangerous mission along side a few other ppl, he saves everyone but her, and he doesnt know if it was worth it

word count: 3.1k

warnings: lil bit of fluff, LOTS of angst so buckle up

edited: this is one of my longest fics so far, i put a lot of effort into this one kdsjnsdkfn

a/n: hehe ily anna but this request not cool dawg (jk ily but writing this hurt like a buttcheek on a stick)

masterlist | teaser

You look out the window, holding the beautiful baby boy you and Peter made in your arms and rock him back and forth. Your eyes scan over the city buildings, knowing your husband’s somewhere out there stopping crimes and saving lives.

“Did you know Ben, that your daddy is out there kicking butt? Saving lives, almost every day?” you look down at your sleepy baby.

He glances up at you with half-lidded eyes and coos, reaching out to you. You smile warmly and let him grab your finger.

“Yup, that’s right, daddy’s Spider-Man. I almost fainted when he first told me during our Senior year of high school,” you shake your head and chuckle at the memory.

You continue to sway him in your arms until he falls asleep. You hum quiet lullabies and walk over to the bedroom, placing him in his crib that was next to you and Peter’s bed.

Your head snaps up once you hear the bedroom window sliding up slowly. You chuckle quietly and place your hands on your hips, already knowing who it is.

Peter crawls in and onto the ceiling, closing the window with his foot. “Peter Benjamin Parker, you better not jump down. Ben’s asleep,” you warn in a hushed tone.

He looks over at you and takes off his mask, flashing you a sheepish smile. God, you could never get tired of watching him take off his mask like that.

He crawls down the side of the wall and quietly lands, walking over to you. He holds your waist and you wrap your arms around his neck, pressing your forehead against his, “You seem really beat, Mr. Parker,” you mutter softly.

“I sure am, Mrs. Parker,” he pecks your lips, glancing down into your eyes.

You sigh longingly, curling your fingers in his hair, “Was it worth it?” you tease quietly.

He sighs softly, “Are you going to ask that every single time I go out on a patrol?” he murmurs against your lips.

“Mhm, because you’re not just coming home to your lovely wife. You’re coming home to your lovely wife and baby boy,” you whisper.

“In my eyes sweetheart, it’s worth it to save another one’s life, stop crime and come home to my whole world, you two,” he cups your face, pressing kisses all over.

“But what if you don’t come home one day?” you whisper, feeling your eyes begin to gloss at the thought.

Peter tilts your head up towards him and kisses you deeply, bringing you closer, “You know I don’t know the answer to that. You shouldn’t constantly worry about the future baby, you should try-”

You sigh against his lips and pull away, “I know, Pete. I know,” you mumble.

“I love you, and Ben, so much. Don’t ever forget that okay?” he holds your cheek gently, caressing it.

You place your hand on top of his nodding, “We love you more.”

Some nights he came back without a scratch but most nights he came back with much more than just a scratch.

Ben’s next to the couch sprawled out on a soft blanket, playing with some of his toys.

You’re fixing up some dinner until all of a sudden you hear a thud from your bedroom. You frown and quickly look up, turning off the stove in an instant.

You glance over at Ben making sure he’s fine. He looks up at you with curious eyes, his mouth all over a teething toy. You smile softly then quickly walk over to your bedroom, “Pete?” you peek your head in.

You gasp at the sight of Peter flat on the floor by the window, holding the side of his torso in pain. You rush over and slide next to him, lifting his head up gently to rest him on your lap.

“What happened?” you whisper, placing a hand on his cheek.

He smiles timidly and looks up at you, “I-I’m fine I swear baby, just a little whoopsie,” he breathes out.

Your eyebrows furrow in concern, and slowly lift up his hand. You frown at the deep cut above his hip, “Can you get up? I need to patch you up Peter,” you whisper.

He nods and carefully begins to sit up. You help him stand up and walk him over to the bathroom. You watch him lift himself up on the counter, letting out a sharp grunt.

You sigh, grabbing some cloth from the bottom drawer and handing it to him. “Apply pressure okay? I’m going to check on Ben,” you walk off.

You see Ben begin to doze off and walk up to him, scooping him up in your arms. You hold him gently and head back to the bedroom, placing him in his crib.

You walk back to Peter and get out the medical kit you have nearby at all times. Peter watches you with tired eyes, holding the cloth you gave him to his wound.

You look up at him and press a kiss against his forehead, “I think you need stitches bub,” you hold his cheek. He nods against your touch.

“Okay Mrs. Parker,” his raspy voice making your heart clench.

After stitching him up, you help him clean himself up. You stand in between his legs and wrap your arms loosely around his neck. You give him a concerned look that makes him pout.

“I know what you’re about to say.”

“Was it worth it?”

“Baby,” he groans quietly and pulls your waist close, “Yes, yes it was.”

You hum quietly, threading your hands through his hair, “Why?”

He nuzzles his nose against yours, letting out a quiet sigh, “You know why.”

You exhale and press your lips against his for a moment. He kisses back and holds you closer. You pull away and cup his cheek in your hand, “I guess so,” you whisper.

You never stopped asking him that question every time you came home. Deep down, you dread the day you won’t be able to ask him due to him never returning.

Though you knew it was repetitive and annoying to ask, you couldn’t help but ask. There was this one night where Peter wasn’t having it and the two of you broke out in a fight that thankfully ended in an agreement.

Peter tiredly crawled through the bedroom window, freezing as his enhanced hearing picked out the soft snores that came out of Ben’s mouth.

He smiled softly and closed the window, jumping down quietly. He walks over and adjusts Ben’s small blanket. Peter shuffles over to the kitchen to grab some food.

“Hello to you too,” you piped up from the couch, leaning on the palm of your hand.

“Sorry babe, hi,” he came up to you, bending down to kiss your forehead.

“You okay? Rough night?” you sat up, looking up at him worriedly.

“Don’t worry, I’m fine,” he waves his hand and goes over to the fridge, grabbing some food.

You sighed and followed, leaning against the counter. He heated up his food in the microwave and glanced over at you, “What?” he yawned.

“Was it worth it?” you teased, poking at his side.

Your smile faltered as you noticed he didn’t react. He let out a weak chuckle, “Mhm.”

“Peter, I’ve known you for what? Six years now? You can talk to me bub,” you murmured.

“Do you always have to fucking ask that question? Every single fucking time I come back from risking my life for others, “was it worth it” bullshit? Do you!?” he snapped his voice loud yet low enough to be heard by you but not by Ben. He dragged his hands down his face and looked over at you with the most exhausted expression, waiting for a response.

Your heart raced and you felt your throat begin to swell, never expecting Peter to burst out like that, “I-I never meant for it to upset you P-Pete,” you whispered, “I j-just-”

“You just what huh? Y/n, love, I don’t think you understand what I do out there,” he grits through his teeth, turning off the microwave that went off. “Of course it’s fucking worth it, I’m an Avenger. A hero. It’s what we do! That’s all we fucking do,” he fumed, pacing back and forth.

You inhaled sharply, quickly wiping away your tears that fell from your cheeks before Peter saw but you failed to do so. He stopped in his tracks, his heavy breathing calming down, “S-shit baby, I-I’m so sorry-” he took a step towards you.

You took a step back, “N-no, it’s okay. I get it, it was inconsiderate of me to ask, constantly. I-I just thought it was kind of like an inside joke y-you know? But there’s no excuse for it,” you whimpered, “A-actually a part of me, h-has been wanting to bring up y-your career Peter.”

He nodded, walking over and cupped your face, wiping away your tears, “Talk to me sunshine, I-I’m not mad. I’m not mad at you at all, dammit it’s just been a long day and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you just now. I-I’m calm, just talk to me. I’m here, I got you,” he pressed a kiss against your forehead, his words starting to take an affect on you.

You let out a shaky breath and nodded, “Peter, a-are you ever going to consider r-retiring? I-I know you’re young and I know it’s s-selfish of me to say, but you could do so many other great things. L-less risky careers, because we,” you choke slightly on your words, Peter instantly placing a hand on your back to soothe you. “B-because we have a family now Peter, and if you,” you sobbed, “If you died, god I don’t know what’d I do.”

Peter’s heart shattered at your words and he pulled you into a tight hug, bringing your head to his chest. “I know, I know,” he whispered painfully. “Y-you have to trust me, and what I do. I-I love you both, with all my heart. With all my entirety. But I-I just can’t give up what I do.”

You sighed deeply and nuzzled your head into his chest, “I get it Pete,” you sniffled, beginning to calm down. “I really do. But remember what you told me that night when I found out your identity?”

“Wanna check out the other web shooter?” he muttered, playing with your hair.

You stifle a quiet laugh, “Besides that. You told me you kept your secret for the longest time because you didn’t want to put my life in danger. Nor May’s, nor Ned’s. Or anyone close to you,” you sighed. “D-does that not concern you now?”

Peter tensed at your question, “W-well when you put it like that. I feel like shit now,” he grumbled making you chuckle. “Look, I’ll talk to Tony okay? I’d never want to put you in danger, let alone our own son. I-I’ve just been so wrapped up in being this superhero that everyone looks up to that I- I didn’t realize I have everything I could ever need in front of me. You and Ben,” he squeezed you tightly in his arms. You smiled in content, tearing up and held him close.

Even after that argument you had with Peter, you still managed to ask him the question. Luckily without pissing him off. He eventually came up with different creative and adorable responses each time which you absolutely adored.

“Peter, I’m going to run to the store real quick m’kay? Watch Ben,” you walk over to where he’s sitting, wrapping your arms around him.

He looks up at you and you peck his lips causing him to grin, “Okay mama.”

You smile happily, ruffling Ben who’s sitting in his dad’s lap and grab your keys, walking off. Ben pouts slightly and reaches out for you as you leave the apartment.

“Don’t worry buddy, mommy will be back,” Peter ruffles his head gently making him giggle. “Now look,” he props him up to face the TV, “That cool guy right there, that is Luke Skywalker.”

Soon after about two Star Wars movies later, Peter began to get worried. He places Ben who fell asleep back in his crib.

He walks over to his phone and leaves you another message. He paces around for a couple minutes and quickly glances at his phone repeatedly.

His heart jumps out of his heart when he hears your ringtone and immediately picks up, “Y/n? Are you okay? It’s been almost two-”

“Peter Parker,” a low raspy voice answers, “I hope you didn’t forget about me Spider-Man,” he chuckles darkly.

Peter’s eyes widen, panic beginning to rush throughout his body, “Where is she?” he spits.

“She isn’t the only one in danger Parker,” he holds your phone up, a bunch of other voices crying out for help.

“P-Peter!” he hears Aunt May wail out.

“You fucking monster,” Peter snarls, clenching his fist.

“Wilmington Fifth Street, the warehouse on the right. Can’t miss it. If you call backup, all your loved ones will be dead,” the anonymous enemy retorts and ends the call.

Peter quickly calls Tony, “Kid what? It’s like 9-”

“Mr. Stark please s-send someone over to my apartment to watch Ben. I-I have to take care of something please,” Peter explains, putting on his suit.

“On it,” Tony recognizes the panic in his voice, “Do you want me to send backup?” he asks but doesn’t receive a reply as Peter hangs up.

Peter paces around, running his hands through his hair. Within a couple of minutes he hears someone walk up to the front of the door and swings it open before they could knock, “Oh thank god, Happy. Please, watch Ben. I have to go,” he rushes back to the living room.

“O-oh okay, yeah of course. Peter what’s-” Happy asks closing the door behind him.

Peter jumps out the window and swings off to the address that clouded his mind. “God please, please,” he whimpers to himself and eventually lands in front of their warehouse.

He couldn’t just burst through the front door, that’d bring too much attention. Peter looks around and quickly swings up to the roof, finding an entrance from a lifted up window.

He scans the room quickly to see Aunt May, Ned and MJ all tied together. “Karen, is there anyone else is the building?” he mutters lowly.

“Yes. But if you act now, you can save those three,” she states.

“On it,” he grunts and swings down quietly. They all look up at Peter with fearful and tear-filled eyes, shaking their heads.

He quickly takes off the tape on their mouths and unties them, “Peter no he has her-” May sobs.

“I-It’s okay, everything’s going to be okay. All of you need to get out of here now. Police are on their way, they’ll be around the corner,” they all nod in response, too shaken up to say anything. He leads them towards a backdoor entrance. “Where’s Y/n?” he asks, before letting them go.

“She’s in the back, w-with the Vulture,” Ned looks over at Peter.

“He came back?” Peter’s breath hitches. “N-no time, okay go,” he pushes them out and quickly swings back inside.

“Karen, where are they?” Peter whimpers under his breath. She instantaneously shows the whole warehouse mapped out and where she detected two life forms.

Peter rushes over to the back and slams the door open. You sat there tied up in a chair and unconscious.

“Y-Y/n,” he sobs, stumbling over towards you.

“I wouldn’t,” a voice rings from behind you. Peter snaps his head up and shoots a web towards the voice.

The Vulture’s new and improved wings cut his web as it came towards him, “You know Parker, all those years ago. When you were a little fucking Freshman, you took everything from me. Everything.”

“You’re supposed to be in jail,” Peter snaps, walking over to him swinging a fist to his masked face. The Vulture’s wings are too fast and slashes his arm before Peter could make contact.

Peter lets out a strained yelp and gets kicked down by him. “Now, I’m going to take everything away from you, starting off with your wife,” he spits, placing his weighted foot down on Peter’s head.

Peter yells in frustration and shoves him off, attacking him with all the power and rage he mustered up. The Vulture easily blocks his attacks and slams him against the wall, “Tsk tsk. You never learn,” he steps on him roughly and repeatedly. Kicking him down with his weaponized and sharp boots. Peter weakly attempts to block his blows but fails. The Vulture chuckles darkly and walks over to you, shaking the blood off his boot.

“N-no, Y-Y/n, please n-no,” he gets up slowly, his ears beginning to ring and his sight becoming blurry. The Vulture circles you, cutting off your restraints and kicks you to the floor, your body falling to the ground with a thud.

You wake up to a sharp pain impaling your stomach, the Vulture’s point of his wing shoved into your torso. You let out a blood-curdling scream, bright red seeping out from your clothes. You feel something warm and thick begin to spill from your mouth.

“Y/n!” Peter shouts, tears streaming down his face. He limps over to you and falls by your side, screaming out in agony.

Suddenly the walls shake and Tony appears with the rest of the Avengers that were nearby to help. “Fuck,” the Vulture mutters and makes a run for it, about to fly off.

Tony blasts him down and flies down, managing to fight him off. Steve helps him out and they capture him, getting his weapons off him as they cuff him up.

You look around beginning to see white. Your ears fill with ringing and faint voices, until a familiar weak voice snaps you back into reality for a moment.

“M-my pretty girl, h-hey. Hey,” Peter whispers, brings your head onto his lap.

“P-pete?” you barely whisper, weakly raising your hand to his cheek.

“Y-yup that’s me. Your husband, the father to our child,” he shakily holds your hand against his cheek.

“B-Ben? Baby B-Benjamin?” you ask, eyes fluttering as you stare into Peter’s glossy eyes.

He nods in response, tears dripping down from his face onto yours.

You go silent for a while, trying to process everything that just happened. Peter chokes on his sobs, and brings you close to his bruised body.

“P-Peter?” you rasp.

“Y-yes my love?” he sniffles, brushing a hair out of your face.

“W-was it worth it?” you ask tiredly, lips quivering as a slow tear rolls down your cheek.

He lets out a loud strained sob, shaking his head furiously, “N-no. No it wasn’t. It wasn’t,” he wipes away your single tear with his thumb.

You barely curl your lips in an attempt to smile and close your eyes, going limp in his arms. Peter bursts out in a fit of sobs and hugs you close to his body, his body trembling against yours.

Tony and the rest of the team stand around nearby, pain filling their hearts and tears welling up in their eyes as Peter cries out in misery.

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