#i tried to write battle quotes

[just-absolutely-super]

Mayl: You called Dex and not me?

Lan: Well, when you have a crazy idea you don't call the voice of reason

#megaman battle network #lan hikari #mayl sakurai #when the world isn't in danger i like to think lan and dex get into shenanigans #and mayl tries to stop the shenanigans but fails #i'm making these instead of writing fanfics whoops #incorrect quotes

[heartateasee]

“Epilogue”

Word Count: 19.2k (a long one, but it didn’t feel right to split it up)

(Epilogue for ‘Goodnight and Go’)

Warnings: Mentions of physical abuse, oral sex (m and f receiving), fingering (f receiving) and unprotected sex

⋆★★⋆

*Late winter - a little over three years since the wedding*

*It will be notated in the chapter when the song is meant to start. I highly encourage you to start it when it comes into play, but you can also do whatever your sweet heart desires!*

Sitting in my go to cafe, I jot down another thought into my journal as I take a sip of my black coffee. Today had been a heavy mental day, and I just needed to get out of my house to clear my head. My therapist tasked me with taking up journaling at the end of my first month of therapy - my fourth session. She asked me to start out with lists that she would give me, but then after a while she told me just to jot down whatever came to mind. Even though I wasn't actively in therapy anymore, I still held onto this - it was enough for me to not have to go to an appointment every week.

I was proud of myself for that. I've been able to use the tools given to me to be able to tend to my own mind, and to talk myself down - only having to see my therapist when absolutely necessary.

I couldn't pinpoint why today in particular had my mind so boggled though. There wasn't anything upcoming that I was stressed about that I could think of off the top of my head.

My pen continues to scratch over the page, and I feel that my eyebrows are narrowed in concentration as I let out thought after thought. I could feel the fog in my mind starting to ease with each line, but still...it didn't seem to be enough.

As much as I have gotten a good grip on myself and my emotions, there were days that I still just felt...off. Today was definitely one of them. It wasn't so much anxiousness or nervousness that I was feeling - something that I've battled with for the past two years. It was something different. It was something that I couldn't exactly put my finger on, and I think that's what caused my mind to race from the moment I opened my eyes this morning.

The cafe was bustling on this Saturday morning, and I was lucky that I was able to get my usual two seat table in the back corner. Although I can hear the baristas loud and clear from here, the rest of the noise in the cafe seems to drown due to how far back I am.

"Order for Carter!"

My pen stops, and I take a moment to blink at the page.

It can't be her.

Shaking my head, I push the thought from my mind as I chew on my bottom lip - trying to figure out how to phrase what I want to write down next.

It's not until I see a streak of red hair out of my peripheral that I finally look up.

There's no mistaking the woman smiling as she picks up her cup off the counter. She digs into her bag, and I can see that she's given the barista a postcard with an illustration of a flower on it. There's some kind of quote on the back, and by the look on the barista's face, it must be something kind, or inspirational.

Before I can even think about it, I push myself up from my seat to get a better look. My movement must have been caught out of the corner of her eye because it's barely a few seconds later that she's looking at me.

She holds her paper cup in both hands as we stare at each out from a ways across the cafe - her expression unreadable.

I hadn't seen her since the wedding. After that, she disappeared from my life completely. I had tried for months to reach her, but I never got any response. Gwen had told me she had tried to do the same. I'd only found out just in the past year that was a lie.

No one saw Carter that first Christmas after everything.

After that, the holidays were always separated due to the fact that Carter and Gwen's parents divorced only a few months after the wedding. I knew that  Carter spent the holidays with her father while Gwen and I spent them with mother. Their parents hardly had any communication with each other, and I knew that their mother hadn't attempted to reach out to Carter at all - something she made very clear whenever she could.

I should've realized then what this all would become.

Carter's brown eyes look around for a moment before she starts to walk over to me, and I immediately feel my hands begin to shake.

"Harry," she says, just barely meeting my eyes now that she was closer to me. "Hi."

"Hi, Carter," my voice almost sounds strained as I speak, and I clear my throat almost immediately. "I...I didn't know you were visiting."

"Oh, no," she shakes her head. "I'm not visiting. I moved back a couple of months ago. This place has become a regular spot for me. I don't live too far from here."

I raise my eyebrows at her words, and it's then I can see she's looking past me to get a view of the table I had been sitting at - as if she were looking for someone else.

"Do you want to sit?" I ask, turning around and gesturing to the chair across from the one I had been occupying. "I'm here by myself."

Carter takes a moment before she nods. "Okay."

I pull the seat out for her, which earns me a small 'thank you', before I sit back in my own seat. Carter turns to hang her bag on the back of her chair before she's facing forward once more - both of her hands finding their way around her cup again.

Her eyes look down at my journal, and I quickly close it - pulling it from the table to slip into the green tote bag I had brought with me.

"You journal?" She asks, tilting her head to the side.

"Uh, yeah," I lift a hand to rub the back of my neck. I've never really talked to anyone but my therapist about my journaling before. "For about a year or so now."

Carter hums as she nods, pursing her lips to the side. "I do too, but I'm going on about two and a half years. I picked it up when I started therapy."

My chest aches as I can see a sheen of sadness in her eyes for a moment before it disappears. "I started it up for the same reason too."

I can tell this surprises her, and silence blankets over us for a moment.

"Are you still tattooing?" I ask - grimacing when I realize just how awkward this feels between us.

"I am," I watch as a large smile creeps onto Carter's face. "I'm actually working at the shop with Duncan again. He was nice enough to hire me back as soon as I told him I'd be moving home. He was thrilled, actually."

"Of course he was," I say, laughing a bit. "You're exceptional at what you do, Carter. Any shop would be lucky to have you."

Carter's cheeks flush due to my compliment, and I watch as she lifts her cup to her mouth. She hisses quickly as she pulls it away, and I know she's burned her tongue.

"Here," I reach forward without hesitation to take the cup from her.

Her eyes are trained on my every move as I pull the lid off the cup, setting it down on a napkin on the table. This was something I did for her quite often when we were in college. There was a bookstore/coffee shop that we frequented a few days a week, and Carter was never one to be patient and wait for her drink to cool properly. I started doing this as a quick solution without her even asking. It just became a habit for me.

I can tell her eyes are on my left hand, and then she looks up at me. "You...you're not..."

"I'm not...what?"

Carter looks back at my hand before looking at my face again. "You're not wearing your ring."

My eyebrows knit together as I look at her. "Carter," I start, and I can tell she's genuinely curious as to why that particular piece of jewelry is missing. "Gwen and I are divorced."

Her eyes widen for a moment, and I watch as the color leaves her face. "O-Oh....oh," she says, straightening up in her chair as she drops her hands to her lap. I can tell she's running her palms over her thighs as she shakes her head. "I'm sorry, Harry, I-I didn't-"

"You didn't know?"

Carter shakes her head again, and I can see with the way her chest is moving that she's trying to take deep breaths.

"Hey," I whisper, leaning forward to take one of her hands in mine from underneath the table - thankful that this table wasn't too big so I was able to reach across to her easily. "It's okay. It actually doesn't surprise me that you wouldn't know."

I run my thumb along her knuckles, and I can tell it's starting to soothe her as she finally looks up from the table to make eye contact with me.

"My dad had said that Gwen moved away, but I figured that meant you did too. That's why I was a bit shocked to see you here," she says, and I can tell she's trying to put it all together. "I don't think he even knows you guys have separated. My mom had only told him about the move."

I can't help but roll my eyes at that. Another thing that didn't shock me. Their mother didn't want their father, or Carter, to know about the divorce. She didn't want Gwen to look like she failed at something.

"She did move," I give Carter's hand one more squeeze before sitting back in my chair - our touch separating. "About five months ago. We've been separated for almost a year and a half. She left a few months after the divorce was completely finalized."

Carter's face shows that she's completely dumbfounded by this information, but she's trying to keep it together. "That's...that's why I moved back, you know? Because I thought you both were gone."

Her words sting, but I can't hold them against her. We wronged her, Gwen and I both, and I don't ever expect her to forgive me for the way that I treated her while I was with Gwen. I know that if anyone had treated me the way I did her, I'd never speak to them again.

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable by asking you to sit with me. I didn't know you thought I was gone too," I tell her, and now I'm the one gripping my thighs. "You don't have to stay if you don't want to. I more than understand if I'm the last person you ever wish to talk to."

Looking down at my lap, I pick at my cuticles as I wait to hear her chair slide across the floor. But I don't.

I look up to see Carter still looking at me, and she shakes her head. "I chose to sit here, Harry. I'm okay, I promise."

I give her a small nod, but I immediately look back down at my lap.

A few seconds pass before I hear her clear her throat. "I like your hair. I never thought I'd see you with it so short."

I can't help but smile at her words, and I look at her once more. "Yeah? It's not weird without the curls?"

"I mean...it's a little weird," Carter smirks, and I know she's trying to help our playful banter come out again. "But they look like they're on the verge of growing back. I'm enjoying this little faux hawk thing you have going on though."

She lifts her drink to her lips and takes a sip - not flinching away from the liquid this time, so I know it's cooled down properly for her.

"It feels nice," I shrug. "Healthy and all. I buzzed it completely when the divorce was finalized. It was therapeutic, honestly."

"Oh? I wish I could've seen it buzzed," she giggles, pursing her lips to the side before speaking again. "I get the whole changing your hair thing though. I went brunette a few months after I left."

"Did you really?"

"Yeah, let me see. I'm sure I still have some pictures on my phone," she says before digging into her bag.

She swipes on her screen for a while before turning her phone to face me. "See?"

Even though I know it's Carter in this picture, it's not my Carter. She's smiling for the camera, but there's a dimness behind her eyes that I've never seen from her. She was unhappy - that much was clear.

"Oh, wow," I say, giving her a half grin so as to not disappoint her. "It definitely suited you, but I have to be biased when it comes to the red. It's just you."

"Yeah, I like the red too - I like being natural and all that."

She drops her phone back into her purse before I go to speak again.

"So, did you move back by yourself or..."

"Yeah, just me, and my little black cat, Ichabod," I can see her face light up as she mentions her cat, and it causes a warmth in my chest. "I had been seeing this guy for a little over a year, and I broke up with him about...half a year ago now? It just wasn't working out."

"I'm sorry to hear that," I tell her genuinely. "He wasn't bad to you, was he?"

"Oh, no," Carter shakes her head adamantly. "Not at all. He was actually very sweet, but I realized that even though I loved him, I wasn't in love with him anymore. So, I broke it off almost immediately after realizing that. I didn't want to string him along when I wasn't going to be one hundred percent in the relationship."

"And why do you think you weren't?" I ask, and I watch as Carter starts to play with the cardboard sleeve around her cup. "Why do you think you weren't one hundred percent in the relationship?"

Her eyes peer up at me underneath her lashes, but her face is still tilted slightly towards the table. "I think you and I both know why, Harry."

My stomach flutters when I realize what she's alluding to, but I don't want to press that conversation any further. Not here, and not after just seeing her again for the first time in what feels like a lifetime.

"Well, I'm sorry it didn't end up working out. You deserve all the happiness in the world."

"What makes you think that just because that ended that I'm unhappy? I'm actually the happiest I've been in a while since moving back," she tells me, but there's no aggression to her tone as she continues her explanation. "I've just been letting life take me where it wants for the most part, and yeah I get lonely sometimes, but it's okay. The quiet doesn't bother me anymore like it used to."

The confidence that I can see in her now is admirable. She's so sure of herself, and I can tell she means what she says.

Carter is happy.

"Can I ask what it was that you handed the barista earlier?" I have a feeling that whatever that was plays into this newfound self that I can see she has.

"Oh, those are just little postcards I make for fun. I do them in series, I guess? Like right now they're all different flowers, and the quotes on the back have to do with either growth, or rebirth," she explains, leaning forward onto the table a bit. "I keep them in my bag, and I hand them out to people who I feel need them, or someone who's shown me kindness that day. It's nice to see their reactions."

Carter has always had a big heart, and it makes me ecstatic to see that hasn't changed despite what those closest to her have put her through.

As happy as it makes me to see her own growth, there's also a part of me that's sad that I missed it. But the guilt is what chews at me the most. The guilt of just letting her slip through my fingers like I did.

"Oh, shit, what's the time?" I hear Carter ask before she pulls out her phone again. "I need to be at the shop in ten minutes. I'm sorry, I've gotta go."

"That's okay, I was just finishing up too. Let me walk you out?" I ask, and she looks over to me after stopping her slightly frantic movements.

"Sure, yeah."

She puts the lid on her drink as I stand and put the strap of my tote over my shoulder, and soon we're both heading towards the entrance of the cafe. I hold the door open for her as we step outside, and we move over onto the sidewalk so that we're not blocking the door as we stop.

"It was really good seeing you, Carter," I tell her honestly. "And I know it might be too much of me to ask, and you can absolutely say no, but do you think we could meet up again sometime?"

Carter chews on her bottom lip as she contemplates my request before she nods. "Yeah, I think that would be okay. I think I'd like that."

I can tell I have the stupidest smile on my face when I hear her agree. "Okay, yeah, uhm, let me just get my phone out for you to put your new-"

"I have the same number," she interrupts me, and I could tell she was a bit hesitant to say that considering she never once responded to me when I tried to reach out. "And I still have your number too."

I don't say anything in response to that because I understand why she did what she did. I give her a nod, slipping my phone back into my pocket.

"Okay, well, I'll text you so we can plan something, alright?"

"That sounds good."

We stand there for a moment, and I can tell neither of us really know how to end the conversation.

"Did you ever get your heart tattoo?" Carter blurts out, and I can see it was something she had been itching to ask me this whole time.

I laugh softly. "You remember that?"

She nods while giving me a small shrug. "It just stuck with me."

"I haven't, no," I say. "I actually haven't gotten anything since before...everything."

"You mean like before the wedding?"

"Yeah," I sigh, running the tip of my tongue along the inside of my bottom lip. "Didn't really have the motivation or inspiration to get anything new."

Carter stares at me for a moment before speaking again. "Well, if you want to still get it done, I'd be more than happy to do it for you. Just text me when you're free, and I'll see if it lines up with what I have booked right now."

"Wait, are you serious?" I ask. I'm taken completely by surprise that she would offer to do this so quickly after just seeing each other again.

"Well, you told me you wanted me to be the one to do it, right?" She asks playfully as she bumps her shoulder against mine. "I'm not letting anyone else tattoo that on you."

"I guess when you put it that way," I say as if she's twisting my arm, which causes her to let out a noise of disappointment - having her now shove my arm. "I'm kidding, I'm kidding! I wouldn't want anyone else doing it for me either."

Carter looks up at me with a beaming smile, and for a moment I'm transported right back - as if things never changed. "Then it's settled. Just text me."

"I will."

She begins to walk away from me before she stops. "Oh, here!"

Walking back over, she digs in her bag and flips through something for a moment before she's extending one of her postcards out to me. "I think this one belongs to you."

I look down at it for a moment, and by the time I look back up, I can already see her back towards me in the distance. Shaking my head at her with a smile of my own, I look back down at the postcard to really study it.

On the front was just a plain line work illustration of a daffodil. I flip it over on the back, and I see this one in particular has two quotes. I read each of them over once, but then I find myself reading them again, and again once I process what they really mean.

"The people who are meant to be will always gravitate back towards you, no matter how far they wander." - UNKNOWN

•

"Souls tend to go back to who feels like home." - N.R. HART

⋆★★⋆

It's been a couple of weeks since I saw Carter at the coffee shop, but we had been texting almost every day. I didn't seem too eager, so I didn't text her about booking the tattoo until later that evening, and he she was able to fit me in today. Neither of us made any moves to ask about hanging out outside of my tattoo appointment, but I wanted to so badly.

When I got back to my place after running into her that afternoon, I immediately got on my computer and searched what a daffodil symbolizes. I was met with the answer that it meant 'rebirth and new beginnings' among a few other things, but those stuck out to me the most. She was sending me a signal that maybe we could build this again.

I knew that things were going to be different, it was almost impossible for things to go back to the way they were back then, but I desperately craved to be in Carter's presence again.

Her quote that she handed to me was right. She felt like home.

That was a feeling I hadn't experienced in a while - not even when I spent my first Christmas back in Holmes Chapel this past December. It felt weird going back there by myself, but I did find comfort in being back with my mother, especially since the divorce was still pretty fresh. I ended up staying with my parents for a little over a month. I had never been more thankful for my job allowing me to work from home more than during that time.

I didn't realize just how much time I needed away from everything until then. It gave me a chance to help clear my head, and I still met with my therapist over Zoom so that I kept up with my sessions. It wasn't until I got back that I made her aware that I thought I was doing okay on my own, and that I wanted to see her on a per needed basis going forward. She agreed that she thought that was appropriate, and I've only had to see her once since then.

The need to see her came after Gwen was back in town visiting her mother. She told me that after she moved she realized she had taken some stuff of mine, and she wanted to give it back. I had tried to convince her just to leave it on her mother's porch whenever she left, and that I'd come by and grab it once I knew she was gone, but she refused. I was tempted to tell her just to forget it, that I didn't want any of it back, and that was the truth until she rattled off what the box included. It wasn't until she said there was a spiral bound notebook with a tattered red cover that I knew I needed to get that box back.

That notebook was one that Carter and I used to write notes back and forth to each other in during the class where we first met.

It was obvious that Gwen hadn't gone through it. If she had, there was no way she would've wanted to give me something so sentimental back - especially since it included a piece of Carter. When I went over there to get the box from her, she was immediately in my ear the whole time. She was asking if I thought I had made the right decision divorcing her, and if I was happy with myself. She asked if I had found someone new - asked if they felt as good as she did it.

But it wasn't until she brought up Carter that I snapped.

"I swear to god, if you're with my 'pick me' of a little sister, then you're just pathetic," she had said, and that caused me to stop right where I was. I had been trying to get back to my car so I could pack the box up and leave.

"I think you're a bit mistaken, Gwen," I told her as I looked over my shoulder to see her standing there with her hands on her hips. "You've always been the 'pick me' out of the two of you. I thought by now you maybe would've looked in a mirror and seen that you're the problem - not just with me, but with everyone. All I can say is that I'm lucky I can see it now, and I'm glad I got out of our marriage when I did."

That left her completely dumbfounded, and she didn't utter another word as I got into my car and left. I'm hoping that's the last time I'll ever have to see Gwen.

Regardless of how I defended myself and Carter against her, I was still shaken up by the encounter. My therapist was thankfully able to work me in that same day for a visit. She didn't respond much to me - it was more so of a vent session for me anyway. At the end of that session, she told me that I should be proud of finding it within myself to not only see Gwen, but to also stand up to her. That was something I hadn't been able to do at all in my last year with Gwen.

The first six months of marriage was wonderful, but the remaining year was horrific. I had dealt with Gwen coming home and screaming at me almost every day due to stress from her work. It wasn't until things got physical that I knew I had to leave.

At first it was a slap, and she apologized profusely for it - telling me she would never mean to hurt me, and she couldn't explain why she did it. I let it slide because I knew how much pressure she was under. The next time she hit me it was her closed fist connecting harshly with my chest. The final time, she had attempted to throw a vase at my head. She was lucky I was able to move out of the way quickly, and I avoided it.

I left that night, packing up what I absolutely needed, and I told her that I would be back to get the rest of my things. It took me about a week to get everything out, except for that one box of stuff apparently, and I made sure that I checked our Ring camera for movement before going over so I could see if she was at work. I didn't want to see her anymore at all. The thought of being in her presence made my skin crawl.

The whole thing made me wonder if the physical part of her anger was only just towards me, or if she had ever gotten physical like that with Carter. It broke me to think that Carter could've been on the receiving end of her wrath in that way, and I prayed that I was wrong in thinking that it maybe had happened in the past.

I let Gwen keep the house because I didn't want it. I didn't want the awful memories those walls held, and I knew that with the divorce I'd end up getting some money back for it considering we bought it together. Once I got the money from everything, I ended up getting a house of my own. Thankfully Gwen told the courts the divorce was amicable even though she really didn't want it, and the only reason why she agreed to that was because I agreed to not bring up her abuse if she did so.

I just wanted it all to be over. I wanted to start fresh, and I needed to be rid of her.

I'm drawn out of my thoughts when I realize I'm close to the tattoo shop, and I do my best to force the negativity out of my mind. Today was going to be a positive experience. I also think that today is going to set the tone of where things go from here with Carter. I'm hoping the outcome is us trying to rebuild our friendship, but I would be more than understanding if Carter didn't wish to get close with me again in that capacity. She had every right to deny me.

I parallel park on the street right out front of the shop, just across the street, and hop out. Once I'm inside, I'm immediately drawn to her red hair as she stands at her station. I can see that she's applying some second skin to the forearm of the girl sitting on her table.

"Harry, right?" I hear my name being called, and I look over to see Duncan.

"Yeah, that's right," I give him a small nod while sending him a smile. "It's been a while, Duncan. How are you?"

"I've been good, man, really good," Duncan says as he leans against the check-out counter, arms crossed over his chest. "Business has been great, and I just moved into a new house with my wife and little girl. No complaints. How about you? Carter mentioned that you would be coming in."

I can't help but laugh a bit when I try to think of how to answer Duncan's question. I've never been one to dump my feelings on people when they casually ask how you're doing. "I'm getting better," I tell him honestly. "Had some things happen over the past couple of years, but I'm definitely finding myself again."

Duncan doesn't get a chance to respond as Carter starts walking her client up to the counter. "Hi, Harry," she says, her smile growing the closer she gets to me. "I'll be just another minute or so."

"Take your time," I tell her, shoving my hands into my front pockets.

"You can go ahead and wait by my station if you'd like. I'll just need to get everything sanitized once I'm back over there, then we can start," she tells me, and I give her a nod before following her instructions.

I sit down on one of the stools she had over there as I wait for Carter, but I find it hard to keep my eyes off of her from across the shop. It's clear to see that she's definitely gotten more sure of herself over these past few years. She holds a smile the whole time she checks the client out, and I can see this newfound charisma that I caught at the cafe the other day just seeping out of her.

Once she finishes up, she heads back over to me, and I witness a softness pooling in her eyes as she stands next to me. "How are you?"

I stand up from the stool, and out of habit I go to wrap my arms around her. Carter's eyes widen slightly, but she doesn't stop me, if anything, she's quick to reciprocate. Her cheek rests against my chest, and I feel her let out a large exhale as her fingers curl into the loose jumper I was wearing.

"I'm good," I speak, finally replying to her question - moving around so my own cheek is now lying on the top of her head. "How about you?"

I feel Carter nod against me for a moment before we separate. "I'm good as well."

She moves away from me to slip on a pair of gloves, and she begins to wipe her table down completely. Once done, she motions for me to sit there, and she starts to get her station ready.

"Are you nervous?" She peeks at me over her shoulder with a smirk before looking back to her task at hand.

"A little bit, actually," I chuckle, running my hands over the tops of my thighs. "It's been a while, and I think I remember how it feels, but I'm questioning if I really do or not."

"Oh god," Carter gasps as she turns around completely, tugging on my jumper to signal it's time to take it off. "You're not going to pass out on me, are you?"

I can tell she's still being playful with me, and I shake my head. "I think we're good unless I somehow randomly see someone getting their tongue pierced."

Carter tilts her head back with a large laugh, clapping her hands together as I pull my jumper over my head. I'm wearing a black tank top underneath to make it easier for her to access the inside of my bicep. "I'll make sure to have Duncan tell me if someone comes in for one of those so we can make sure you don't get up to go to the bathroom and pass the piercing room at that time."

I roll my eyes at her while she pulls her hair into a bun on the top of her head as I hang my jumper on the small coat rack she has in the corner.

As I walk back over, I see that Carter is slipping the drawing she's made of the heart I wanted out of the front of her binder. The front of her binder is usually reserved for fun little sketches of hers, much like the ones I first noticed when we were in college. I look at the side of her face as I watch her, knowing she usually keeps her stencils in one of the clear sleeves she had inside.

"Did you just finish that up last night? Is that why it's in the front?" I ask, gesturing to the drawing as I sit down on the side of the table.

Carter glances at me out of the corner of her eye as she shakes her head. "Uh no...I've had this done for a while," she says, and she quickly clears her throat. "I just need to get it all prepared, I'll be right back."

My eyes watch her as she goes, but she returns quickly with another fresh pair of gloves on, and the stencil of the heart in her hand. "You said you wanted this on the inside of your bicep, right?"

I nod as I lay back on the table, and I extend my arm out for her. Carter sits down on her stool, rolling over to me before holding the edges of the stencil between the pads of her thumb and index finger on each of her hands. Tilting her head to the side, she tries different positions before it, and I see her eyes light up when she gets it right. She lays the stencil down - smoothing it over to make sure it all gets on my skin.

"Have a look," she says as she pulls it off, and I stand from the table one more to take a look at it in the full length mirror.

I move my arm in all different directions to make sure none of them make it look funny before I nod. "That's perfect, Carter. It looks great."

Once I lay back down on the table, she grabs her gun and scoots as close as possible to me. "You ready?

"Yep," I sigh, looking at the ceiling as I hear the buzzing start.

It's only a few seconds later that I feel that familiar scratch across my skin, and I grimace slightly from how long it's been since I've felt it. I take in a deep breath as I can tell she's trying to warm me up a little bit before she really gets started.

"Doing okay?" Carter checks in on me, giving my upper bicep a reassuring squeeze as she dips back into the ink for a moment.

"Yeah, feels like I remember," I say, earning a small giggle from her.

"Well, that's good then, yeah?"

I nod as she starts up again, and it's silent between the two of us for a while before Carter speaks.

"I've had the heart finished since before...everything," she whispers, and I move my head to the side so I can look at her properly. Her eyes stay focused on her work, but she flicks them up to meet mine for just a moment. "I was going to show you the drawing that night, sort of as a surprise present, I guess."

It's as if I almost feel my heart actually crack in my chest at her confession. I couldn't believe that she had finished it up back then, but I also couldn't believe that she had held onto it for this long. Part of that gives me hope that she was just waiting for the opportunity for us to reconnect at some point, like we have now.

I had thought about her so much since the last time I saw her, but she had grown even heavier on my mind since I started therapy. My therapist really helped me work through my feelings, and the more I worked through them, the more I realized just how much I had fucked up with Carter. I've beaten myself up time, and time again while looking back on how I treated her, and how I allowed her to be treated.

The image of her standing in that groom's suite, begging me to reconsider my marriage is forever engraved in my mind. Her body trembling with her arms wrapped around herself, tears streaming down her cheeks as she cowered away from me. I thought that night I found her outside at the formal was going to be the worst I'd ever seen her, and the fact that I was the cause of an even worse reaction than that...I'll never be able to forgive myself. My therapist has told me time and time again that I needed to find it within me to do so, but I don't see how it's possible.

"And I'd really like to talk everything over at some point," Carter speaks up again, but now she keeps her sight down, and off my face. "But for now, I think it would be nice to just get to know each other again, if that's something you're okay with. Once we feel like we're in a comfortable place, then I'd like for us to be able to put it all out on the table. I have a lot I feel like I need to say, and a lot I need to ask."

"I think I'd really like that too, Carter," I agree, reaching my hand out when she stops tattooing me for a moment. I wrap my palm around her forearm, rubbing my thumb against her smooth skin. "You don't know how nervous I've been these past couple of weeks. I was just holding onto hope that you would give me another chance."

"I still have a lot of hurt feelings," she explains as I drop my hand to allow her to start up her work again. "But I also didn't handle things in the right way. I was hoping that seeing each other would open up that opportunity for us to reconnect."

Looking up at me again for just a second, we give each other soft smiles.

It's a couple hours later that Carter finishes up my tattoo completely. My bicep now felt like a bunch of pins and needles, but I didn't want to have to come back for another session. I've always been one to complete my tattoos in one session, if possible. Carter had already let me look at the tattoo, and put the second skin on it before I walked over to the coat rack to grab my jumper.

"Here, let me help you," I hear her say after she disposes of her gloves. "Go ahead and put your arms in, and I'll help pull it down."

I do as she asks, keeping my arms above her head, and only starting to lower them down as I feel her pulling the hem of my jumper down as well. Once it was on properly, she gave me a nod. "I'm going to just clean up really quick since you were my last one of the day, and then I'll meet you at the counter, okay?"

I head over to the lobby section of the shop and sit down on one of the couches, beginning to scroll through my phone as I wait for her. I can hear her holding conversations with a couple of people around the shop over the next few minutes, and finally I hear her calling my name.

Walking over to the counter, she tells me my total, and my eyebrows narrow. "Carter, you know that's not right," I tell her with a small laugh.

"Friends and family discount," she shrugs, giving me a smug smile.

I roll my eyes, but I allow her to charge me what she wants - handing my card over. Once everything was settled, we head out of the shop, and I point to my car that's parked across the street. "That's me."

"That's me," she mimics, pointing to her car that was just a little ways down on the same side of the street.

"I'll walk you."

Carter nods, and I rest my hand against the small of her back to keep her on the inner part of the sidewalk as we make our way towards her car. Once there, she turns to face me, a tender look on her face.

"It was nice getting to tattoo you again," her voice is warm as she speaks, and I feel my stomach fluttering with how sincere she sounds. "I haven't tattooed a friend since Kieran, and that was a couple of years ago, so this was wonderful."

"Well, I'm glad it was you that could give me another tattoo after so long," I tell her, reaching out to rub my hand up and down her arm for a moment before dropping it.

"I'll text you, and maybe we can plan on meeting up to do something sometime next week? The weather is getting warmer, so I was hoping to spend some more time outside."

"Yeah, that sounds great. We can definitely figure something out," I respond, biting down on my bottom lip.

"Before I go, I wanted to give you this," Carter says before digging into her bag, much like she did before she walked away from me at the cafe. "Wait to read it until you're in your car but...I think this explains what I felt all those years ago a little better than I did back then, and how I've felt going forward."

Looking down at the postcard, I see that there's now a line illustration of a nightingale instead of a daffodil. "This drawing is beautiful, Carter."

"Thank you," she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear before clearing her throat. "I'm sorry to dart off so quickly, but I promised my dad I'd come over and make us some dinner tonight."

"Don't apologize, we practically spent the afternoon together."

We step forward to wrap ourselves in another embrace - all while being mindful of my fresh tattoo.

"You smell the same," I hear Carter whisper after a moment, and I look down to see her snuggling her nose into my chest. "I've missed it."

Swallowing harshly, I force away the tears that want to spring in my eyes. "You smell the same too. I've missed it...missed you so, so much."

I take a chance, and I press my lips against the crown of her head. I feel Carter's cheeks round out against my torso before she's looking up at me with a wide smile. "I'll see you soon."

"See you soon."

We separate, and I stand on the sidewalk to make sure she takes off safely. She waves at me through her window as she drives off, and I make my way over to my car. I'm immediately pulling up google on my phone to look up the symbolism of a nightingale, and the tears I had just wished away come crawling back.

"Found in Persian culture, through poetry and music, the nightingale has been celebrated as a symbol of unrequited love."

I press my tongue against the inside of my cheek as I look out my window, feeling moisture beginning to wet my face. My hand shakes as I continue to hold the postcard, but I can't look back down at it. I'm scared of what the other side, the quote, will bring.

I give myself a moment or two, sniffling softly before I look down - flipping the card over.

"No matter how much you wish you could, you cannot control how another person feels and loves.

Just because someone fails to see your worth, it doesn't make them a bad person, and it doesn't mean you are unlovable. It simply means that they aren't meant for you.

You should never have to spend your days and nights wondering if you are good enough for somebody. You are enough. You are more than enough for the right person.

Always remember that your happiness comes first. Focus on loving yourself, really loving yourself and you will see your value and find the strength to walk away from unrequited love.

Weeks, months, years will pass and you'll look back and wonder why on earth it took you so long to see that all along you deserved everything you always wished you had.

- CHARLOTTE FREEMAN"

⋆★★⋆

It's a Saturday night, and I've been sitting outside of Carter's house for the past fifteen minutes - just staring down at the bundle of daffodils in my hand. My mind is going a mile a minute, and I know I have to calm myself down before I go up and knock on her door. I got here early for this specific reason. I knew that I would probably work myself up, and sure enough, I have.

This was the first time either of us had agreed to meet at one of our houses. Over the past three and a half months, we've been seeing each other only in public spaces.

I was more than okay with us only meeting out in public. We both made the decision to take things slow as we rebuild our relationship with each other, and we both know that this relationship will more than likely be similar to our previous one, but there's no way it could ever be the same.

I think the scariest thing for me was that I found myself falling back in love with Carter easily.

Through therapy I realized that I never really stopped loving her in that way, I had just suppressed my feelings because I thought she didn't feel the same.

Going to therapy made me remember a lot of things I had pushed to the back of my mind when it came to the transition of my feelings for Carter into my feelings for Gwen. I had forgotten about how anytime Carter was out of the house, Gwen was telling me that she was out with a boy. I thought that Carter was hiding a relationship from me, and subconsciously, that's why I hid my relationship with Gwen. It wasn't until years later that I found out that Gwen had been feeding me lies.

Bottom line - Gwen manipulated me our entire relationship.

I know I'm not completely innocent, and that her manipulation isn't a complete excuse for the way that I acted, but it made me realize just how much she lied to me. She did anything she could to keep her hooks in me until she knew she had me fully secured, and then it was already too late with Carter. I had already separated myself from her to keep myself from getting hurt even further, and I had already started to fall in love with Gwen.

I know that I loved Gwen at one point. I know that I was still in love with her even when she hit me, but I know I fell right out of love with her the night she could've caused me irreparable damage.

Fuck, I didn't need to be thinking about all of this right now.

Tucking my chin to my chest, I suck in a deep breath as I lift my hand to pinch at the bridge of my nose. Reminiscing on the past in this very moment wasn't helping me calm down.

Instead I try to focus on the positive. Carter somehow found it in her heart to give me a second chance, and our reconnecting felt different to than I had anticipated. I could tell by the way she looked at me that she felt the same way too. We exchange small intimate touches every now and then, but that's as far as it's gone. I've also noticed that we're a lot more flirty with each other than we used to be. It's almost as if we were a couple that had separated, and now we're trying to figure out if time apart could make it work again. It didn't feel like we were necessarily rebuilding just a friendship.

It wasn't until this past Tuesday when we were sitting on a bench in the park that I asked her to dinner.

Carter had been talking about getting a corn-dog from this street cart for a few days, and I finally suggested to her that we just go and get them together. She was more than ecstatic when I told her that I wanted to go too. She got a regular corn-dog, and I got one with a plant-based hotdog inside. While we sat on the bench, her legs were draped over my lap as she leaned against the arm rest, ankles crossed one over the other.

Her heart shaped sunglasses were perched on her nose as I traced my fingertips up down one of her legs as we ate.

"I'm so happy right now," she said, using her hand to cover her mouth full of food as she spoke - as if she couldn't wait to tell me. "Thank you for coming with me, Harry. We picked such a good day too. It's beautiful out."

I swallowed the bite I was chewing before responding to her. "Of course I was going to come with you. I had to see the look on your face once you finally got your corndog."

The giggle that left her warmed my heart as her nose scrunched up, and I gave her thigh a squeeze. Humming, she let her free hand travel down to wrap around my fingers, and we remained like that for the rest of the time that we ate.

We stayed at the park for about an hour total, and it wasn't until we were about to get up and leave that I finally grew the balls to ask her what I had been wanting to ask her for a few weeks at that point.

That's when I asked her about grabbing dinner together, something we hadn't done yet.

"Yeah, of course we can grab dinner sometime. That would be fun!"

I remember my palms immediately going clammy, and Carter could instantly tell that something was wrong.

"Hey, are you okay?" Her palm found my back, and she began to move in circles.

"Well...I just-" I stumbled over my words like an idiot, finally clearing my throat when I felt like I had myself somewhat together. "How would you feel about considering it a date?"

Even though Carter had her sunglasses on, the lenses were pretty transparent, and I watched as her eyes went wide - her pink lips parting in surprise. I immediately had to look away from her, and I looked down at my hands as I nervously rubbed them together.

"Sorry...I'm sorry," I whispered, closing my eyes tight as if that was going to just make what I had asked disappear. "Forget it. We don't have to. I just ruined this whole fucking thing."

It was a few seconds later that I felt Carter's hand leave my back, and soon her palm was cradling one of my cheeks. She turned my face so I was looking at her - causing me to reluctantly open my eyes.

"It can be a date, Harry," she told me, and I instantly felt a knot form in my stomach. It wasn't out of anxiousness though, it was out of excitement. "I'm a little nervous given the past, but I'd like for it to be a date too."

When we separated that day, she let me give her a kiss on the cheek, and it made me tingle all over when I saw her face flush.

We haven't really spoken about our feelings at all, and we haven't discussed any expectations of each other either. I have a feeling that both of those things are bound to come up tonight. That's probably another reason why I'm so incredibly nervous.

My eyes glance over at the clock, and I see that it's now the time that I told her I would pick her up.

I suck in a deep breath as I get out of the car, my hands shaking as I keep a grip on the daffodils, and I head up to her door. Lifting my finger, I ring her doorbell before taking a small step back so that I'm not crowding her immediately.

The door opens after a moment, and once Carter's eyes connect with mine, a large smile takes over her features. "Hi, H," she says. She looks me over for a moment before looking back at my face. "You look so handsome."

It's as if my breath was sucked from my lungs when she opened that door. The dress she has on fits her perfectly, and she has her hair slightly curled so that it bounces a bit as she moves. I couldn't help but internally laugh out in adoration when I saw she had all black Vans old skools platforms on her feet.

Some things never change.

"Wow, Carter," I breathe, shaking my head. "You look gorgeous."

Carter's face flushes just like it did the other day. "I'm in protest against heels at the moment, so I hope Vans are okay," she says before her eyes drop to the flowers in my hand.

"Oh!" I exclaim with a chuckle, extending them out to her. "These are for you. I was trying to figure out what flowers to get, but these seemed rather fitting."

"Hmm," she hums, giving me a playful grin. "I wonder why."

She peeks over her shoulder for a moment before looking back to me. "I'm just going to put these in some water and then we can go. I'd invite you in, but I know Ichabod's hair is going to cling to you if you come inside and he rubs on you."

"That's alright, take your time," I tell her with a nod.

She shuts the door, and it's only a minute or so later that she's stepping back out. A thin black cardigan is now on her arms, and she has a purse draped over her shoulder. She locks up her door before facing me. "Ready?"

"Ready," I say, placing my hand on her lower back as we make our way to my car.

I open the passenger door for her, which she thanks me for, and I make sure she's in securely before I shut her in. My hands continue to shake as I head over to the driver's side, and I get in before starting the car up.

I can see Carter looking over at me out of the corner of my eye, and she almost instantly reaches out to take one of my hands off the wheel.

"Why are you shaking so bad?" She holds my one hand in both of hers - lazily intertwining one set of her fingers with mine while the fingertips on the other trace over the back of my hand. "We don't have to go anymore if it's going to make you so nervous, Harry. I don't want you to be-"

"No," I shake my head quickly, squeezing my fingers around hers. "I mean, yes, I'm nervous, but I don't want to not do this because of that. I've just...I'm really bad about getting in my head these days, and I just overthink things. I've been overthinking all day."

Carter frowns, and she brings my hand up - pressing her lips against my knuckles. "If it helps at all, I'm really glad that we're doing this. I've been looking forward to it since you asked on Tuesday."

"Yeah?" I ask, feeling her confession ease my nerves some.

"Yeah," she nods, biting down on her bottom lip.

"I can never thank you enough for agreeing."

Carter's eyes wander over my face for a moment before settling back on my own. "I told you...I've missed you. It's been long enough that I'm okay to let myself be open with you again, and I'm sure we'll touch on that more later, but I just know I'm ready for this. Whatever this ends up being after we talk everything out. Okay?"

"Okay," I bring her hand up to my mouth just like she did to me earlier - mimicking her same actions.

I let my lips rest against her skin a little longer than she did mine before I lower our hands back down. I go to pull my hand away so that I can place both hands on the wheel, but Carter tightens her grip. "Can I keep holding it?"

My heart palpitates in the best way at her question, and I feel warmth in my face. "Yeah, of course."

"Okay, good," she giggles before dropping my hand into her lap.

I bite back a larger smile as I put my car in drive, and I start heading towards the restaurant where I had made us reservations for tonight.

Music plays quietly in the car as we make our way down the road, and Carter and I keep stealing glances at each other as we do so. Eventually she moves her other hand down to completely encompass the one she had already been holding once again, alternating between smoothing her fingertips over my knuckles, and then the back of my hand.

I haven't had contact like this from someone in so long, and it feels nice. The tenderness of her touches makes me feel wanted and comforted all at the same time - two feelings that Carter used to bring me previously before everything went to shit.

Our conversation on the way there was light, just asking how our work week went, and she was telling me about a large back piece she had just finished up on a client.

Once we arrive at the restaurant, I open the passenger side of the car for Carter. Instead of letting me just place my hand on her back, she takes my hand in hers - lacing our fingers together. I stroke my thumb along the back of her hand as we head inside, and I can see that Carter is a bit shocked at the place I've picked out.

"Harry," she says, looking up at me with worry. "This place is so nice, and I'm wearing Vans. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you wanted to wear Vans," I respond, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. "Besides, they look cute on you, and if they want to say something about them, then I don't want to give them my business anyway."

Carter shakes her head briskly at me as we approach the host stand. "Two for Styles."

The host nods and grabs a couple of menus before we're guided to our table. I smile when I see they've remembered to set it up the way I wanted, with two candles lit in the middle, and two glasses of red wine already poured.

I can hear Carter gasp behind me, but she doesn't say anything yet as I pull her chair out for her to sit.

The host places the menus down as I sit as well, and I thank them before they walk away. I keep my eyes down on the menu that was placed in front of me, but I can feel Carter's on me.

"Harry," she speaks up after a moment, sweetness laced throughout her tone. "Did you have them do this for us?"

I nibble on my bottom lip before nodding. "Yeah, I did. I just wanted tonight to be special. For you...for us."

Carter reaches out across the table, curling her hand around mine. "Thank you so much. This was a nice surprise, and this restaurant is beautiful."

She gives my hand a squeeze before pulling away, and we begin to properly look over our menus.

"What are you thinking?" Carter asks, and I tilt my head to the side.

"I'm eying the pasta pescatore, how about you?"

"I think I'll do the lobster and mushroom risotto," I look up as she twirls a curl around her finger - lips pursed to the side.

I'm completely captivated by the way the candlelight hits her face, capturing her beauty in a way that has my stomach swirling.

After a moment, a waiter comes over with a couple of waters to accompany our wine, and he asks if we're ready to order.

"You first," I say, gesturing my hand towards, and Carter smiles.

We each order our food, and the waiter heads off as we grab our glasses of wine. I clear my throat, my other hand gripping to my knee as Carter's round eyes stare at me.

"This might seem silly, but I just wanted to say a couple of things," I chuckle nervously.

Carter gives me a reassuring nod before sinking her teeth into her bottom lip.

"First off, I want to thank you again for saying 'yes' to dinner, and especially having it be a date. I'm really trying to be more straightforward with my feelings in general, but especially when it comes to you now that we've reconnected," I start off, my fingers curling tighter to my glass as I feel I could drop it at any moment. "I also wanted you to know that these past few weeks of getting to see you again have been the best weeks I've had in the past two years or so.

"Like you said before, I know there's still a lot that's left unsaid on both of our parts, but I really don't know what I would do if I lost you again, Carter. Losing you the first time completely changed me as a person, even though I didn't see it at the time. But with that being said, if you realize that this isn't going to work out, and this isn't what you want, then you walk away whenever you want. Put yourself first - always."

Carter blinks at me, and I can tell that I've caught her off guard with my words, but telling her that the ball was in her court when it came to us was something I needed her to know. I didn't want her to let the guilt of knowing I'd be upset to lose her again be the cause of her putting herself into something she didn't want.

"Wow, Harry," she opens and closes her mouth a couple times - clearly trying to figure out how to respond. "These few weeks have been really great for me too, and like I told you, I've missed you. I allowed for this to be a date just as much as you did, so I hope you don't feel like you forced me to label it as that.

As of right now, I'm more than happy with how things are going, but I can't lie to you and say that may change after we really talk things out. I don't think it will, but I just want you to know that's a possibility, okay?"

I move my head in agreement with her words. "Of course, Carter - of course."

I watch her shoulders deflate, as if she's let out a sigh of relief before we're both extending our glasses forward - clinking them together.

"To us," she speaks up first, a large smile back on her face.

"To us."

We each sip our wine, and she hums out in appreciation. "Oh my god, Harry," she licks over her bottom lip. "This wine is delicious."

"Yeah? I went over their selection online, and I tried to pick out what I remembered you liking."

"It's perfect. Thank you."

I watch as she looks around the restaurant a bit before looking back over to me. "Well, I guess now is as good of a time as any to start, huh?"

"If you're ready, then absolutely," I reassure her.

"I should probably start with me figuring things out about my mom and Gwen since that all ties in to how everything happened, especially with us," she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear before continuing. "One of the first things my therapist had me focus on was my emotions towards them, but most importantly their emotions towards me.

"She had me write down times throughout my life where my mom yelled at me, which wasn't often, but I came to the conclusion that she only ever did when it involved something with Gwen. Whether it be me trying to play with one of her toys, or if Gwen and I were fighting about her borrowing something of mine when Gwen knew that I would be needing it, my mother always took Gwen's side - even when she was clearly wrong."

Reaching forward, she takes a large sip of wine before she continues. "I also realized that my mom and Gwen have extremely jealous tendencies. So, when the wedding came around, it was such a big thing for Gwen, and the way they treated me just magnified. They wanted it to go perfectly for her, and they didn't want me to ruin it. That's when I became their pin cushion."

I grimace at her use of words, but I know she's not wrong.

"Also, I don't know if Gwen ever told you, but she caught me leaving the groom's suite that day," she places her hands on the table, and I can see they're slightly trembling. "She told me she knew of my feelings for you, that she always did, and she couldn't believe I told you on your wedding day of all days. That's when she said she never wanted to see me again, and for me to stay away from you both. I listened to her because I knew you loved her, and I knew she made you happy, and I didn't want to take that away from you."

My heart aches at her words. Gwen never told me she had seen her after her confession to me. I didn't know that she ever knew that Carter had feelings for me.

"She didn't tell me," I whispered, shaking my head.

"I also need to apologize to you, Harry. I need to tell you sorry for never telling you my feelings sooner, and I also need to tell you I'm sorry for when I chose to tell you about them," I can see tears are now gathering in Carter's eyes, and she takes a minute to collect herself before she's blinking them away.

"I never wanted to tell you about my feelings because I didn't want to ruin what we had, but it seems that's exactly what I did because I waited so long. Maybe if I had just kept my mouth shut, none of this would've ever happened, and I-"

"Carter, I'm going to stop you right there," I butt in, not being able to listen to her blaming herself in this way. "Do not apologize to me for that. I won't let you blame yourself for what happened. There's only one person to blame for our friendship falling apart, and that's me."

Carter keeps quiet as I continue. "I should've never let Gwen keep me from you like she did, and I should've never let her treat you the way she did. Things would've been different if I had put my foot down. If I had refused to let her wedge her way between us, but I didn't do that.

"She fed me lies our entire relationship when it came to you. She knew I liked you, she revealed that to me during our divorce process. Whenever you were out of the house hanging out with Kieran, she told me you were seeing different guys, and I don't know why I believed her. Then she started dropping hints that she liked me. One thing led to another, and it just happened. The last thing she really lied to me about was her trying to contact you after the wedding. She led me to believe that she was trying just as hard as I was to reach you, and in our last big fight, I found out that wasn't the case."

Now I'm the one reaching for my glass of wine, taking two large sips. "I realized in therapy that I never truly lost my feelings for you, Carter. I just shoved them down, and I suppressed them once I started having feelings for Gwen. I convinced myself that they were gone because how could I love two people at once? But, my love for you was never like my love for Gwen. The love I had for you..."

I swallow harshly before I look down at my lap, shaking my head. It's only a second later that I feel the tips of Carter's fingers brushing over my knuckles.

"Tell me, please."

Looking back up, I meet her eyes, and I can tell she's pleading with me to be honest. It was hard to act like I was talking about the past. My love for has only grown more since being around her again.

"It was everything. Even if I didn't think it was reciprocated, and even though I didn't even tell you about it."

Carter opens her mouth to speak, but we're interrupted by the waiter setting out dishes down in front of us. We each thank him, placing our napkins into our laps as we grab our silverware.

"Let's just enjoy our meals for now," I reach out to grab her hand, and I kiss the back of it quickly. "And if we want to talk more later, we can."

"Okay," Carter breathes, and we both begin to dig into our food.

The rest of our time at the restaurant consists of us talking about much lighter topics while stealing bites of each other's food.

Now we're sitting outside of her house in my car, my hand placed on the inside of Carter's knee as she twists my rings around my fingers.

"Is there anything else you wanted to talk about before I head in?" Carter rests her head back against the headrest, looking over at me.

I know that what I'm about to bring up is serious, but it's something that's eaten away at me for too long.

"I didn't want to ask in the restaurant, and you can decline to answer if it's too personal, but it's something that's been weighing on me. Did...did Gwen ever get physical with you when you guys would argue?"

I'm hesitant to look at her, but I'm met with narrowed brows on her face. "I mean, we used to wrestle as little kids, but when we got older, no," she shakes her head. "Why? Did she get physical with you?"

I stay silent as I look down to stare at my steering wheel, and I can hear Carter inhale sharply when I don't answer after a moment.

It's not even a second later that I feel her arms around me, and she's pulling my face into her neck. "I'm so sorry, Harry," she whispers, pressing a kiss to my temple.

I feel tears welling in my eyes as I lift a hand to wrap around her wrist. I feel her nails scraping against my scalp to comfort me as her other hand caresses my back.

"You didn't deserve that. You'll never deserve that."

We stay in the same position for a while as she continues to comfort me silently before she speaks again. "You know that right? That you didn't deserve that?"

I nod, sniffling as I lift my hand up - pushing the tears off my cheeks with the heel of my palm as I sit back. "I know. I know I didn't deserve it."

"Good," Carter says softly, and I can see the worry behind her eyes as she stares at me.

Biting down on her bottom lip, she grabs her purse that was on the floorboard, and she shuffles through it. She looks back over to me, and that's when I see she has another postcard in her hand. "I had two of these in my bag tonight. I figured this whole thing could've gone one way or the other. "

She extends the card out to me, and I take it from her. I look down to see a line illustration of a butterfly on the front. I know that she did this on purpose because we each have butterfly tattoos, and it has me feeling hopeful.

"Will this quote tell me which way it went?" I ask her with a soft chuckle, and it causes her to giggle as well while she shrugs.

"Flip it over and find out."

Taking in a deep breath, I flip the postcard over, and I read over the quote a few times to really take it in.

"Rewinding time is not possible, but "do-over's" are. Sometimes we get another chance to do something right the second time that we got wrong the first time." - UNKNOWN

I look back over to her after a moment, and her expression is one filled with such kindness that I feel like I could cry again. "In case that wasn't enough to tell you...would you like to come in?"

My eyebrows raise, as I'm a bit shocked that she was asking me to do so, but I didn't give her any time to think that I was hesitating. "Yeah, yes, please," I laugh nervously, and she tilts her head.

"Come on then."

We both get out of the car, and we head up to the door which she unlocks. As we walk inside, she flips on some lights, and I instantly hear small thumps coming from her hallway while we take off our shoes.

"Hello, Mr. Crane," Carter coos as she lowers herself down to pet the petite black cat that's come to greet her. "This is Ichabod."

The image in front of me has my heart completely bursting from how sweet it is, and I follow Carter's actions - bending down to be closer to them both. "Hello Ichabod, I'm Harry."

I hold my hand out, and Ichabod sniffs it for a bit before rubbing back across the front of Carter's legs for a while, but he keeps his eyes on me.

"He's really nice, I promise," Carter says as she continues to rub over his back, and eventually Ichabod makes his way over to me.

I begin to scratch underneath his chin, and behind his ears as Carter stands.

"Do you want some more wine?"

Glancing over, I watch as she walks into her kitchen - loose red curls bouncing as she goes.

"Yeah, I'll have another glass," I tell her, giving Ichabod a few more pets before standing up myself. "Just one is probably good though considering I have to drive."

"What do you think I'm trying to do? Get you drunk so you have to stay over?" Carter looks at me over her shoulder with a shiteating smirk, and I shake my head at her. Knowing that the atmosphere around us has turned playful, I decide to feed into it as well.

"I don't know," I shrug before crossing my arms over my chest as I lean against one of her counters. "Are you?"

Carter hums as she turns back around to grab a bottle of wine out of her wine fridge, and then she walks over to the cabinet housing her wine glasses. "I mean, would you staying be the absolute worst thing in the world?"

My adrenaline perks up slightly at her words, and I quickly clear my throat. "No, I-I don't think that, I just didn't know-"

"Harry," Carter walks over to the counter next to the one I was leaning against - setting the glasses down. "I was just kidding. You didn't think I was that easy, did you?"

Groaning, I look up to the ceiling as I smile.

She's really busting my balls here.

"I'm not used to being one step ahead of you when it comes to picking on each other," she bumps her hip against mine to have me looking down at her again. "I guess I'm making up for all those years you had me blushing like an idiot."

"Yeah, now that's me," I laugh, leaning down to pinch at her waist - causing her to yelp.

Carter eventually uncorks the bottle, and she pours us each a glass of wine as we move over to sit on the couch. Ichabod makes his way over to the cat tree in the corner of the living room, and he makes his way to the top tier - quickly curling into himself and falling asleep.

"He's so cute," I compliment her. "How old is he?"

"Just a little over a year old," she says, looking over to the cat tree for a moment before looking over to me. "I actually found him outside of the shop I was working at while I was gone."

"You're kidding."

Carter shakes her head, swallowing down her sip of wine before continuing. "It was early spring, and it was raining so bad outside. It was chilly, and windy on top of that. I was closing up the shop, and I went around back to throw the trash into the dumpster before getting in my car, and I could hear him crying underneath it after I threw the bag inside.

"I pulled my phone out so I could use my flashlight, and I looked under, and there he was. He was by himself, and shaking, and I knew I couldn't leave him. To be honest, I didn't think I'd have the time to take on a kitten, so I had every intention of keeping him for a few days to get him better before taking him to the shelter. As you can see, I got way too attached and that didn't happen. It worked out for the both of us though. I don't know what I would do without him. He's my little buddy."

"You know it's funny, I had been contemplating getting a cat myself before I ran into you," I tell her. "Now you've kind of convinced me that I need one. The house is so quiet by myself."

"I definitely get what you mean. I've lived alone since I first moved away, and now I couldn't imagine not hearing his little paws on the floors, or hearing him eating his food in the kitchen while I'm sketching at my dining table. You should get one, H," she says, tapping her foot against my thigh. "They're a lot of fun."

"Yeah, I think I might," I say, dropping my hand to wrap it around her foot, running the pad of my thumb over the arch of it. "Would you come to the shelter with me?"

"Of course! I'd love to. Plus, I think I should have a say considering they're going to be around Mr. Crane. I need to make sure they're a suitable candidate for his friendship," she smirks, taking another sip of wine.

"That's fair enough."

It's quiet for a moment before she makes a small noise as she swallows her sip - as if she's remembered something. "Hold on, I'll be right back."

Carter sets her wine glass down on the table, and she slips down the hallway for a moment. I can't help but smile to myself as she's gone - not believing that I'm in her home with her right now, us sharing wine together and talking as if nothing has changed.

This is all I've wanted for so long.

I hear her coming back after a minute or so, and she sits down while passing me a piece of paper. As I study the piece of paper, I see she picks her wine glass back up, and she moves to drape her legs over my lap like she did in the park the other day.

"I drew that while I was in therapy," she said, tapping her fingertips against her glass. "She told me to draw something that provided me comfort in the past, and I came up with this. While I was drawing it, I was thinking of how you used to always hold my hand when we were out with friends if you could tell I wasn't having a good time, or if something was making me anxious. I've been meaning to bring it to show you when we've been hanging out, I just kept forgetting."

My eyes study the drawing, and I wait to ask what immediately comes to mind. "Do you think you could tattoo this on me?"

Carter's eyes look like they're about to bulge out of her head once I look back to her. "What?"

"I really like it, and you drew it perfectly. It reminds me of us too," I nod. "I'd really like for you to tattoo it on me, if you're comfortable with that."

"Harry, you know I'm always more than happy to ink you up. I'm just a little shocked - that's all. I'm more than comfortable with you getting it."

"Maybe in a couple months? I'm thinking on the back of my arm," I tilt my head to the side as I continue to stare at the drawing of two hands holding.

"I think that will look really good, H."

I only intended on staying at Carter's for maybe an hour at the most, but as she indulged in another glass of wine, I decided to stay so she could tell me all about the city she had been living in before moving back home. It was interesting to hear about the life she had without me in it, and I was actually able to listen to her talk about it without feeling a sadness in my chest.

I have her back now, and that's what matters.

Looking over to the clock, I can see it's nearing midnight, and I know it's time to go home.

"Well, I should probably get going," I sigh as I finish up my glass of wine. Only having the one glass at dinner, and then the two glasses here, I was more than fine to drive - especially with pasta sitting in my stomach.

"Oh, only if you're sure," Carter says, setting her almost finished wine down on the coffee table as I stand up. "You're not keeping me up or anything."

"I know, but I don't want to overstay my welcome," I chuckle, walking to set my empty wine glass in the sink in her kitchen.

When I walk back over Ichabod hops off his cat tree and follows me towards the door, circling my feet as he looks up at me.

"I think somebody doesn't want you to leave," Carter giggles as she walks closer to me, fiddling with her fingers behind her back.

"I'm sure I'll see you again soon, bud," I kneel down to give Ichabod a few head scratches before I stand up and look over at Carter. "Do you think that we could do this again?"

"Harry," Carter closes all space between us as she drops her hands to the side. "Have I not made it obvious enough that I more than enjoyed myself tonight? I would absolutely love to do this again."

I let out a small laugh of relief, scratching the back of my neck for a moment while looking down at my feet. Pursing my lips to the side, I look back up at Carter. "Can I kiss you?"

I can tell my request takes Carter by surprise, and I immediately feel like an idiot. "Shit, I'm sorry," I apologize. "I didn't mean to be so forward. You just look so beautiful, and I had such a good time that I thought maybe-"

I'm cut off when I feel Carter's hands cupping my cheeks as she pushes herself on her tiptoes, her taking the complete initiative to have her lips meet mine.

After a moment, I hum in satisfaction, and I drop my arms to wrap them around her. One of them wraps around her waist, while the other curls to the middle of her torso - my hand pressing against her shoulder blades to keep her flush against me. Carter is much shorter than me, and I can tell she's struggling to stay on her toes, so I gently lift her off the floor just a bit using the strength in my arm around her waist - causing her to squeal against my lips.

"Stay," Carter whispers, as she pulls away, her eyes dancing over my face. "Please stay."

My mouth runs dry when I realize exactly what she's saying, and I don't hesitate to give her a nod. "Okay, I'll stay."

Carter smiles, and I reach down to have both arms around her waist before I'm pulling her up higher. She wraps her arms around my neck, and her legs around my hips, as she leans down to reconnect our lips. "Bedroom is at the end of the hall," she mumbles against them.

I follow her orders, carrying her with ease down the hallway until we're in her room. After a few more moments of letting our lips mold against one another, I lower her down so that she's standing in front of me again.

"Are you sure?" I ask.

"I'm sure," Carter says as she takes a step back, peeling her cardigan off her shoulders. "Take your clothes off."

My cock twitches in my pants at her words, and it takes a minute for my body to catch up with my mind. I pull my vest off and toss it to the side before I start to undo the buttons of my dress shirt. I watch as she reaches up to undo the ribbon tied at the top of her dress, pulling it so that it loosens, and she's able to slip her arms out of the material. She pauses for a minute with her hand pressed against her chest to still keep her dress up, watching me with her bottom lip tucked between her teeth.

I shrug my shirt off before I reach down to my pants, unbuttoning and unzipping them - leaving me in just my briefs.

Carter drops her dress, and my breath catches in the back of my throat when I see that her top is completely bare - only a black lace long left on her body. "This...this isn't weird for you, is it?"

I shake my head as I walk forward, my eyes shamelessly roaming over her. I'm taking her all in, as if she could disappear, or like I could wake at any moment - like this was all a dream.

"It's not weird at all," I tell her honestly, and Carter reaches out to wrap her hands around my wrists.

Her head tilts to the side as she moves me around until my hands are on her full breasts, and I sigh as I run the pads of my thumbs over her pebbled nipples. She gasps while throwing her head back - her eyes slipping shut.

Hearing that sound leave her, and seeing that just the smallest touch was bringing her such pleasure, it's like something in me snaps. I walk forward to where she's back against her dresser, and her eyes shoot open.

Carter watches me as I begin to lower myself down her body, pressing kisses to her neck and over her sternum. Once I reach her breasts, I rest the undersides of them in my palms before closing my lips around one of her nipples. She lets out a breathy moan, but we don't sever eye contact. Her hands wrap around the edge of her dresser, her elbows slightly pointed up to her ceiling as I pay the same amount of attention to her other nipple.

"Harry," my name leaving her mouth has me humming against her skin, and she rolls her head on her shoulders for just a moment before her eyes are right back on mine.

Abandoning her chest, I slip all the way down so I'm kneeling in front of her as I kiss over her stomach - hooking my fingers into the sides of her thong. I still hold her eyes, silently asking for permission, and she gives me a nod. I continue to sponge kisses down her body, all while pulling her underwear down at the same time. She's squirming underneath me, and I can tell she's aching for more now.

Once her underwear hit the floor, Carter lifts one leg to step out, but when she lifts the other, I quickly wrap my hand around her ankle - throwing her leg over my shoulder as I toss her underwear to the side.

"Can I taste you, Carter?" I ask, my eyes slipping shut for the first time since I've had my hands on her - the smell of her arousal filling my nose while I latch my lips to the inside of her thigh.

"Please," she whines, and my mouth finds its way between her legs before I can even process. “Oh, god."

One of Carter's hands leaves the dresser to make its home on the back of my head as she arches into me. My tongue is immediately met with her wetness, and I groan at just how much had accrued in such a short amount of time. I lick my way back up until I'm sucking her clit between my lips, and I open my eyes to look up at her.

Her head is back as she pants into the air, her face displaying absolute pleasure as I lift my hand to massage her thigh that's resting beside my head. My touch alerts her, and she looks down at me with pink cheeks.

"Good. 'S so good," she moans deliriously before she tilts her head to the side to rest her cheek on her shoulder - eyes slipping shut again.

I move back down to lap at her dripping entrance before I plunge my tongue inside - teeth scraping over her swollen clit. A strangled, but loud "uh" leaves her as she now curls forward, and the hand on the back of my head is pushing me even further into her core while her other hand drops to grip at my shoulder not cradling her thigh.

Everything about this is causing me to leak profusely into my briefs, and I know that I'm the hardest I've been in a long time. I creep my hand up from her thigh to grip one of the rounds of her ass - feeling her skin pushing through the gaps between my fingers.

"Wait, w-wait," I hear Carter gasp, and I pull away immediately. She sees the look of worry on my face, causing her to laugh breathlessly. "You didn't do anything wrong, don't worry. I just want to make you come twice."

I close my eyes and drop a hand to my briefs to apply pressure to my throbbing bulge at her words - willing away the urge to come right then. After a moment, I feel her slip her leg off my shoulder, pulling my cheek to rest against her stomach as she runs her fingers through the top of my hair.

"Can I do that for you, Harry? Can I have you come in my mouth, and then while you recuperate, you can make me come?" She slides one hand down my back - nails grazing against my skin. "And then when I come, I'll need you inside me, and I hope you'll be hard again. I want you so bad."

I turn my face to kiss along her stomach much like I did before. I'm riddled speechless by her want for me. It had been so long since anyone had talked about me in such a way, and it was causing me to feel so many different emotions.

"Please, baby," Carter whispers, and I slowly feel her lowering her body. I blink my eyes open to see her kneeling in front of me - moving her hands to cradle my face. "Let me make you feel good."

The pet name she uses ignites a fire in me, and I wrap my arms around her to pull her forward - having her thighs straddle one of my own as I press my lips against hers. Her thumbs swipe over my cheek as we kiss, and I tangle one of my hands into the back of her hair. Our lips part to have our tongues rolling against one another which causes goosebumps to coat my skin. We make our way off the ground, but we don't let our lips disconnect as she lays me down on the bed.

My hands wander all over her body as our tongues ebb and flow, and I give her plush hips a squeeze before she's pulling away from me. She runs her lips down my body, and just like I did earlier to her, she starts pulling on the waistband of my briefs.

"Lift your hips," she tells me, and I blindly obey.

Once my briefs are down to the tops of my thighs, my prick springs out and slaps against my stomach - smearing precome onto my skin.

"Shit," Carter's mouth gapes as she stares at me, and I feel myself twitch under her gaze.

She makes quick work of getting my briefs the rest of the way down before pushing herself between my legs. She's knelt down, back arched to have her plump ass in the air - right in my line of vision.

"Fuck, Carter," I whisper, feeling myself leaking even more at the sight. "You're so sexy. I don't think I've ever been this hard."

Carter licks over her bottom lip as she wraps her hand around my dripping cock, her other hand snaking up my chest to rest over one of my pecs - her palm grazing over my taut nipple. She works the hand on my prick up to gather my precome onto her hand before she slicks it down my length. Beginning to pump me, she nuzzles her nose into the trimmed hairs framing my base.

"I can't tell you how long I've wanted this," she tells me, planting kisses all around me.

I try to keep my eyes on her for as long as possible, but the pleasure is overwhelming. If she didn't get her mouth on me in the next few seconds, I was going to end up coming all over my stomach and her hand.

"I can't believe you're even more toned than before," she plants a kiss against my balls, causing my stomach to clench. "So pretty. Everything about you is pretty. You have a pretty face, a pretty body, and a pretty cock."

Her words have me moaning as my toes curl into the fabric of her comforter. I never once would've guessed that Carter was so vocal in the bedroom, and it's causing my head to spin. She was a true vision, and I found myself so lucky to be underneath her at this very moment.

I can't help but slip my eyes shut once her mouth is on my tip, and she lowers herself halfway down my shaft before pulling back up. I find myself biting down on the insides of my cheeks as she kitten licks at my slit - resulting in more precome pouring out of me.

"Carter," I gasp, one hand gripping to the pillow case my head was resting on while the other reached out to wrap her hair around my palm. "I'm not going to last very long right now."

She kisses my tip before I feel her nudge the side of her nose against it. "That's okay. This is about you right now. If you come in five seconds, I don't care."

Carter's mouth closes against me once again, and this time she lowers herself almost all the way down. I feel the tip of her nose against my happy trail as she zig zags her tongue along the underside of my shaft, and I can feel the ball of her tongue piercing pressing against every vein in her wake.

She bobs her head up and down before she presses all the way down, and I feel her swallow around me.

"Fuck," I choke on a moan, squeezing my eyes shut tight as I try to make this last as long as possible. "You're so fucking good at this."

Carter hums in response, causing a vibration up my shaft which has my abs jumping. I now feel my orgasm truly building in my lower abdomen. She pulls up to where just my tip is in her mouth, and I flutter my eyes open to see her looking at me - wiggling her ass in the air. She keeps me stable with one hand, and she parts her lips to show me that my tip is just resting against her tongue.

She shakes her head from side to side for a moment before she focuses on rolling the ball of her piercing over the prominent vein right underneath my tip again and again.

"I'm gonna come," I strangle out, my hand tightening in her hair. "I can't hold it."

Carter holds my eyes as she closes her mouth around me again, and she uses the hand that was holding me in place to start pumping me once more. My eyes roll into the back of my head as I feel myself releasing onto her tongue, groaning out as I buck my hips up subconsciously. It causes a small squeal to leave her, and if I was in the right stand of mind I'd immediately be apologizing, but my brain has gone completely fuzzy. She guides me through my orgasm fully, and I wince in sensitivity as I feel how tight she has her lips against me to make sure none spills out.

My eyes blink open just in time to see her popping off me entirely, and I watch as she swallows - the smallest bit of my come seeping from the corner of her mouth. Her tongue darts out to collect it while she begins to rub her hands up and down the tops of my thighs.

"You okay?" She asks, moving her way up my body so that she's hovering over me.

"I'm more than okay," I laugh, causing one to leave Carter as well. I wrap my hand around the back of her neck. "Come here."

I pull her down to meet my mouth again, and I hum as I taste myself on her tongue. As we kiss, I turn us over to where she's now underneath me. She hikes one of her knees up against my hip while resting her hands on the sides of my neck. Using one hand to hold up the crease of her leg, I dance my other one down between her legs.

I cup her cunt in my hand and give it a squeeze, causing her to gasp against my mouth. Smirking softly, I curl my middle and ring fingers to slip the tips of them through her drenched slit, and I'm almost certain I could already get hard again when she immediately coats my fingers in her arousal.

"You got so wet, Carter," I lick at her top lip before bumping the tip of my nose against hers. "Did getting me off turn you on that much?"

She nods, her hands beginning to roam all over my torso. "Sexiest thing I've ever seen was your face when you came just now."

"You're giving me an ego," I tell her, nipping my teeth against her jawline.

"You deserve to have one," she breathes as I feel her nails digging into my skin.

Swirling my fingertips around her entrance, I let her get accustomed to the feeling before I'm easily gliding them inside of her due to how open she already is for me. She mewls while automatically lifting her hips to meet my fingers, and I help satisfy her even more by tapping against her spongy spot.

"Yes," she whines, her chest now flush against mine - hard nipples grazing my skin. "Please, Harry, don't stop."

"I'm not going to, baby," I assure her, sucking on the junction where her neck and shoulder meet. "Not stopping until your come is covering my fingers, understood?"

"Mhmm," she lets out a high pitched hum as I begin to thrust my fingers in and out of her, making sure to continue curling them every now and again. "I understand."

Carter's heavy breathing fills the room once more as writhes underneath me. I can feel her clenching around me in what seems like intervals, and I know she's probably just as close as I was once she got her mouth on me.

"God, I can't believe I get to have you like this right now," I tell her, testing the waters to see if talking turns her on like it does for me. "Never thought this would be a reality for me. I thought I fucked up so bad that you'd never speak to me again, and now I've got you naked and open for me. I'm the luckiest man in the whole world to be here with you."

She cries out as I drop my hand from her leg to slip between our chests so I can roll one of her nipples between my index finger and my thumb. I can see a sheen of sweat forming on her hairline, and I slip a third finger into her to try to get her to her climax faster - not wanting her to feel like I was teasing too much.

"Harry," she whimpers, opening her eyes to look up at me.

"You're right there, hm?" I ask, tilting my head to the side, and I watch as he nods in response to me. "Come on, flower. Let go for me."

The old nickname I used to call her seems to be what sends her over the edge.

Carter's head tilts slightly back, and I watch as her lips part. A lewd moan starts to escape her as I feel her completely clamp down on my fingers, but I don't take my eyes off her face. She keeps her eyes on me as she comes, her orgasm coating me just like I asked as I continue to ride her through it. She wiggles her hips, as if she's trying to move away from, and that's when I remove my fingers - knowing that she's coming back down.

Her eyes watch my every move as I bring my fingers up to my mouth, sealing my lips around them as I suck them clean. I close my eyes once I have her taste on my tongue again, swallowing down a moan so I don't look absolutely pathetic.

I open my eyes to look down at Carter, and I see her smiling up at me. "Thank you," her chest heaves as she tries to catch her breath. "That felt so good."

Looking down at the same time, we both see that my cock is about half hard, but I know it won't take much longer for me to get fully there when I know where this is going next. I lower myself down to kiss her body like I had before, and I take the time to really examine her skin.

"You got a lot of new tattoos," I say, giving one of her breasts a small squeeze.

"Mhmm," she hums, wrapping one hand around my forearm that was connected to the hand on her chest - rubbing her palm up and down my skin. "A pretty good amount, I'd say."

Lowering myself down onto her, I begin to press my lips over the ones that I know I haven't seen, whispering 'new' as I do so. It causes Carter to giggle as I locate each one, and she tucks her bottom lip between her teeth as she watches me closely, but her smile still shines through.

"I have another," she tells me, tapping me to lift up a bit before she flips over onto her stomach.

I look down and see ink right under the crease between one of her ass cheeks and her thigh. "Also new."

Smirking, I lean down to press my lips against that one as well as she looks at me over her shoulder. I trail my lips up just slightly, biting down playfully on her ass cheek - causing a laughter filled squeal to leave her, and I feel her lightly kicking her feet.

I lift up onto my knees, grasping her hips to flip her over once more, and I feel that I've grown fully hard again.

"You're really sure, Carter?" I ask her, and she nods.

"I've never been so sure about something before. I want you, Harry. Fuck, I need you. I think I'll cry if you're not in me in the next few minutes."

That causes me to chuckle softly. "I'm going to put on some music, is that okay?"

"Yeah, of course."

I stand up from the bed and grab my phone that's in my pants pocket. Flipping through my apps, I locate Spotify and quickly search the song I had in mind. Once I find it, I place my phone on her nightstand before crawling back over her. The intro starts, and my eyes wander over Carter's face before the vocals kick in.

"I get so lost, sometimes. Days pass and this emptiness fills my heart. When I want to run away I drive off in my car, but whichever way I go I come back to the place you are."

"Harry," she whispers as she trails her fingertips down my biceps, and I see tears filling her eyes.

"Don't cry, please," I lean down to press a kiss against each of her cheeks. "It's how I've pictured this moment for so long."

"You mean to this song?"

"To this song," I nod, reaching down to massage her hips in each of my hands. "This is how I felt about you then, and I haven't been completely honest with you because...this is also how I feel about you now too. I meant what I said earlier. You mean everything to me, Carter Adams."

"How are you going to tell me not to cry, and then say something like that?" Carter laughs, but I can hear the tears filling it.

"Sorry, I just needed to let you know," I lean down to press my lips gently against hers before pulling back just slightly. "Do you have a condom?"

"I do, but...are you okay if we don't use one? I have an IUD, and I'm clean. I got checked after my break up, and I haven't been with anyone since," she cradles my jaw in her palms, the pad of her thumb brushing over my lips. "I just really want to feel you."

"I'm clean as well," I nod, running my hands down from her hips to the outside of her thighs to pull her knees up against me once more. "I'd really like to feel you completely too, Carter."

Reaching out, I grab a pillow from the other side of the bed that she wasn't lying on, and I slip it underneath her hips to have her angled up slightly. "Good?"

"Good," she responds, and I can tell that we're both a bit nervous now that we know this is actually going to happen.

With one hand cupping her waist, I wrap my other hand around my length to guide myself to her. I allow my tip to run through her folds to collect her arousal for a moment before I'm pushing inside. My jaw goes slack, and I choke on a groan when I feel just how tight she is around me with me barely being inside.

"Oh," she moans, grasping to the creases of my arms.

I look up from where we're connected to check on Carter, and she gives me a nod - telling me silently to keep going. I'm slow as I continue to push forward, and once I'm completely inside, I hear a flooded whine leave her.

"H-Harry," she says, and she's immediately demanding my attention when I hear how much emotion is behind my name. "I love you."

Those three words that I never thought I'd hear her say to me again, at least not in context, have me crumbling.

My bottom lip trembles as I cup her cheek in my hand. "I love you too, Carter. I love you so much."

Leaning down, I connect our lips in a passionate kiss, neither of us caring as we feel our tears smearing over each other's cheeks. We stay still for a while, hands caressing each other's bodies while our tongues melt together. It was incredible how perfectly we fit together, and my heart was pounding against my chest due to the intimacy that was surrounding us in every way imaginable.

Our mouths separate with a large 'smack' bouncing off the walls, and smiles are immediately pulling at the corners of our lips.

"I'm gonna start moving, okay?"

"Okay," Carter gives my arms a squeeze, and I draw my hips back halfway before allowing myself to fill her to the brim again.

She sighs out, leaning her head to the side to press her lips against my heart tattoo. My eyes catch hers, and she sends me another soft smile. "New," she mumbles against my skin.

That small gesture has a knot forming in my throat again, but I power through. The only thing I want right now is to give her even more pleasure than I did before. I want to show her how much I love her now, and how much I loved her even before.

After a few more moments of letting her adjust, I begin to fall into a rhythm of plunging my slick cock in and out of her weeping cunt. Carter's walls flutter around me every time I'm fully sheathed back inside, and I look down to see her clit all puffy and inviting. I push one of her legs down onto the bed, and then drape the knee of her other leg over the crease of my arm. Moving onto my knees just a bit more, I begin to thrust at a new angle, and her muscles clamp down the hardest they have.

"That it, baby?" I ask, dropping my free hand to rub the pad of my thumb against her clit. I can feel it pulsing, and I know that she's close to another orgasm already.

"Jesus Christ, Harry," she groans, nails digging into my skin as I keep up my pace. "Splitting me open."

Her words have my prick twitching inside of her, and I know that I'm not going to be able to hold out as long as I want to.

I'll just have to make a promise to make it up to her in the morning.

"Yeah? Got you feeling full?"

"So full," Carter shakes her head from side to side, and her eyes are droopy. I can tell she's trying her hardest to keep them open, and on me.

"You feel so good around me, flower," I compliment, licking over my bottom lip. "Prettiest, and sweetest little pussy squeezing me. Can't get enough can you, hm?"

I watch as her body trembles underneath me, and she opens her mouth to say something, but I feel her walls tightening. Looking down, I can see her second orgasm coating my length, and that causes me to start slipping in and out of her even easier than before.

"That's a good girl," I lean down to press my lips to the corner of hers. "You're 's good for me, Carter."

Carter clutches to me, and I allow her to lift her knees to my hips again so that I can be closer to her. I pant against the side of her neck as my feel my own orgasm festering at the bottom of my spine.

"Where do you want me to come?" I ask, and she's quick to press her heels against the small of my back - forcing me to barely move in and out of her now.

"Inside, please," she begs me, and that's all it takes for me to find my second release.

I can't help but bite down on her shoulder as I pump everything I have inside of her sensitive cunt, and I hear her letting out small mewls and whimpers each time I thrust back in. Once I know she's taken everything from me, I collapse on top of her, but I'm mindful not to bare all my weight.

We cling to each other, sharing small kisses and caresses as we come down from our highs. When I finally find the strength, I push myself up onto one of my palms, my other hand reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind Carter's ear.

"I love you," I tell her, and she smiles up at me - corners of her eyes squinting.

"I love you too."

As I hover over the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, I wonder how I could have ever been so stupid to let her slip away the first time, but I have to remind myself that's in the past. Tonight truly marks the new beginning of this relationship, and I know that it'll bring us both nothing but happiness.

I look at her, and I see not only my future, but also my soulmate. Regardless of what happened before, I know one thing is absolutely true - Carter Adams has always been the love of my life.

#harry styles #harry styles au #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fic #harry styles writing #harry edward styles #harry styles smut #harry styles ff #harry styles smutty fanfic #harry styles short story #harry smut #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x oc #Spotify

[monimccoythings]

Tiny and cute!

Here I come with a new one! Thanks to all the shitposts that give me life and inspiration to write this! I think this might be the last one I write of this series for now, because I’m literally out of ideas lol. But it has been really really fun. I really enjoyed it. But don’t worry, I’ll keep posting if I get more ideas.

Ayyy lmao when I get a better quality of the angery boi in a pickle jar I update it. This contains spoilers!!! If you haven’t watched the movie yet, go and watch it now! It’s worth it!

Previous parts: 1 and 2

Next parts: 4 and 5

tags: @loveforfandomsstuff @harpy-space​

After so many tiring weeks working your ass off for the minimum wage, you finally got a very well deserved vacation. Which you were totally planning to spend with your friends and your little pal.

He was such a grumpy pants, he cussed you whenever you came close, but deep down inside his little black heart you knew he craved the attention. If only he didn’t try to bite your fingers with his hampter teef.

So, you, Peach, Mario, Luigi and Toad set off on a journey to the Kong Kingdom, a tropical paradise, for a week of unashamedly lazing off. Since nobody trusted Bowser to be left on his own without causing a ruckus (throwing the piano over and over again against the bars of the cage), you so kindly offered to bring him along in a pet carrier. Oh he was big mad now.

Didn’t help that you kept feeding him apple slices through the bars saying “does the Big Boy want his appy slices?” and it certainly didn’t help either that the Big Boy really wanted his appy slices. To make up for the embarrasment, maybe you’d let him take a sip of your Caipiranha plant cocktail.

The Kong Kingdom was something you wouldn’t have even imagined in a thousand years, and you came from the Mushroom Kingdom. Throw tropical paradise, with Aztec aesthetic and Nash Car in a blender, mix it, and that’s what you get.

One of the Kongs kindly took you all to your huts and very wisely ignored all the Traffic regulations and laws of safe driving, which moved you so much, you spent the entire journey with tears in your eyes and your mouth open in a never ending scream of pure terror.  Yeah, next time you were walking.

One of the most peculiar traditions of the Kongs that you experienced there was some kind of tournament in a stage that was literally floating on air. You had to say it was a bit awkward when the kinda handsome? and cocky prince of the Kongs invited you all over to ‘smash’. Oh well, it would be way too difficult and weird to explain it to them anyways, and quoting Mario, ‘that was a pipe that wasn’t worth exploring’.

The tournament was like watching a real gladiator battle, but the gladiators had superpowers, and they were monkeys. Of course DK won, since, until Mario, he was the undefeated champion. He was a show off, you were truly impressed and cheering for him. He sent a flirtatious wink your way. And a loud thump was heard from inside the carrier. Awww, potato man didn’t want anybody else catching your attention. That was so sweet of him, actually.

The truth was, that despite this being a bit of a holiday, the real reason you all were there was because the turtle had to answer for his crimes against the Kong Kingdom. Godzilla v. Kong. It was jury duty for your friends, yaaayy.

Apparently Bowser didn’t get the memo. He was absolutely angery, screaming, raging, fighting. There was no way to handle him. To try an coerce him out of the carrier and into a proper cage was a task no Kong was patient enough to endure.

Would have it been easier to handle if he had remained in his temporary enclosure? Yeah, it would, but Kongs were monkeys with deeply rooted traditions, and if the teeny mutant ninja toitle had to be in a cage on the witness stand, then he would be in it, conscious or not. Looks like they had very little regard for the rules of the courtroom, but he had tried to kill them, so they were even.

Nobody took into account the possibility that he would manage to break free and make a run for the entrance. Tbh, it was kinda sad to watch him give the effort of his life trying to get to a door that was like ten feet away from where you all were. Still, no Kong was able to lay a hand on him, given how slow he was and how eager he seemed in getting hit, it was as if they were avoiding him on purpose. Peach would later explain you that given the nature of the power up, if he got hit in any way the mushroom would loose its effect and would turn him back to his original size, which was a big nope.

While the jury was debating wheter let him enjoy what little freedom he would have before he was tricked back into the pet carrier or just pick him and finish it, you had a moment of enlightment. That was it, the moment you had been waiting for for the last months, what you had unconsciously been training for your entire life. This was your moment to shine, your moment to be the hero, your moment to-

“Look at you so tiny and cute!” You gushed, picking him up, mindful of the spikes in his shell. He wiggled, trying to be set free and demanding you to put him down that instant or throw him as hard as you could against the wall. But the only thing you wanted to do was...

* smooch * You kissed the tip of his nose. You had been wanting to boop it since day one, and its scales were as soft as you had imagined. Your life dream had been achieved.

Bowser went very still in your hold. His eyes were wide and his pupils had shrunk with shock. The Kongs looked horrified at you so casually holding a narcissistic and psychotic tyrant like a pet, Peach was awkardly smiling at the eldest Kong, Cranky, while Mario and DK were trying as hard as they could to not burst out laughing. Luigi quietly snapped a pic and quickly hid the phone in his overalls, when the guards shot him dirty looks.

It were a couple of uncomfortable minutes that felt like years for all of you, until someone decided to clear their throat, snapping all out of their stupor. Bowser was still frozen so putting him inside the cage was easy. And so, the trial went on without any more disturbances. Whetever the sentence was, he didn’t hear it, nor did he care. Because his mind was occupied by something else. The kiss.

BONUS SCENE

You didn’t know how it had all started but suddenly there was a loud explosion and the entire castle was on flames. Tumbling, you made your way through a bunch of screaming toads towards the source of the blast. Because you perfectly knew where it had started.

The thick smoke made your eyes watery and you blinked several times, trying to clear your vision through the tears. You coughed several times, your lungs ached and you felt like you were going to pass out at any given moment. But you had to keep going fowards, make sure everyone got out safe. And by everyone you meant every single one of the creatures inhabiting this castle.

Finally, you reached the giantic doors. Exhausted, you tripped and desperately clinged onto the golden knobs, burnng your palms in the process due to the overheated metal. Thankfully, your weight was enough to pull the doorknob and push the door open.

You fell against the cracked marble floor, the only things in front of you were the dark columns of smoke that clouded your vision and the burning roar of the flames in your ears. Until, you saw it.

A gigantic dark shadow with glowing red eyes pulled out from the darkest of nightmarish Hells. The eyes burned with a flaming passion and seemed to be piercing your soul. For the first time in a long time, you felt true fear running through your veins. Still, you were too stunned to move.

A low rumble came out of that disturbing sight. It started to approach you, with every step it took the ground shook, and the less time you had to make a run for it. A shiver ran down your spine at the thought that were you brave enough to run, this monster would catch you in a matter of seconds despite its size.

A sob got caught in your throat when the smoke cleared and you got to see the owner of those eyes.

Your little fella. Your beloved tiny musical tot that played piano. Literally everyone’s warnings against him suddenly came to mind. He was not so little now.

Bowser extended one hulking arm, and with one of his meaty fingers, he dragged a claw through your collarbone without breaking the skin, like some twisted version of a caress. He let out a low purr, certainly deepest than it had sounded merely days ago. “Look at you...So tiny and cute...”

#bowser x reader #bowser x y/n #bowser x you #super mario movie x reader #mario movie x reader #Bowser #y/n #mario movie #x reader

[overtake]

every time i remember that gifset of daniel laughing and talking pre-race with max and his dad in spa 2014 and realize that max saw daniel win his third race and red bull's 50th race live and IN PERSON....like daniel must have seemed so cool and larger than life. and then come to find out a few weeks later it's max's test and he had made a welcome video for him. like...it's too much they're TOO MUCH.

This response got ludicrously long.

It’s such “fated to be in each other’s lives forever” shit. It’s always been Max and Daniel. In 2011, before Max was even a red bull junior. In 2014 at spa, ahead of Max being announced for toro rosso. In video form at his super license drive, when Max being his future teammate wouldn’t have even been thought in Daniel’s mind. The things Max got to see Daniel achieve and dream that he might have that and more, and the hot guy doing it is paying attention to him.

He wins that race and backs him, saying he couldn’t have done what he’s about to do and saying Max has the talent to be there… I just know it was good to hear that the man you just watched on the podium believes you deserve this oppprtunity. And if he wasn’t ready at your age and is sitting in front of you a three time winner, what can you achieve by his age?

Obviously, Max has never needed other people’s validation on his skill. He knew he could be successful and had no issue staring his naysayers down. He’s a cactus, not a delicate orchid. You cannot kill him. Your opinions mean nothing to him if you are not in his inner circle (though Daniel certainly worked his way into being someone whose opinion Max holds, hears, and values).

But still, it has to be nice to hear back then that there are people with achievements you want who believe you’re capable of getting there. Even the most brave-faced sixteen year old (with a father who tries to toughen his emotional resolve by saying he will never be anything more than a truck driver) still appreciates having someone believe in him, even if he doesn’t need the validation.

I think people tend to wrongly characterize young Max as some delicate friendless loser and Daniel was the only person to ever show him kindnesses etc etc etc. Max is extremely confident and never relied on Daniel to build self-worth or whatever pathetic way people try to write him. But he always just glowed around him — textbook of that first crush that makes you have the italics “oh. oh” moment. It’s very apparent that Daniel meant a lot to Max as a teammate and that the two of them just liked being around each other, such an anomaly for that era of f1 (ex: like they mentioned in on the sofa 2017, Lewis, — who had been busy with the life altering downfall of his relationship with Nico — was in awe of Max and Daniel and asked for the scholarship of how they got along so well).

It’s so clear that this draw between them started for Max so early from just the way he looks at Daniel on that phone, shy and not knowing quite what to say, and his gaze lingering on it even after it stops playing with that smile. He has to tear his attention away to say his sweet little praise of Daniel. Daniel respected Max as a serious competitor from day one with his quotes about Max’s talents, and that already meant something to Max — but then he also went ahead and liked Max and was kind to Max in a time where he was drenched in doubters.

It’s a great tragedy that we will never know what it would’ve been like to see the two of them in a car that could compete for championships. Obviously tensions would have altered their relationship (I mean, the Renault engine frustration and natural increase in rivalry as it became Max’s team already meant their relationship improved post-leaving), but I’m going to be delusional and think that they never could have hated each other in that bone-deep way because they like each other in a way that is so natural that it feels encoded in their DNA.

Things would have gotten messy as competitive battles do, with many a wall punched and inflammatory quotes in the media pen — especially as Daniel would have to reckon with the inevitability of Max being a generational talent whose already sharp elbows in their early days only doled out more hits on the road to WDC. It’d be claws out, teeth bared tension.

Still, I employ my delusion to say that in that universe, at the end of their careers, they could sit on Daniel’s farm and still enjoy being around each other — like Daniel said in 2019, they had a heated rivalry and pushed each other, but there was always respect. At the end of the day, Max has never stopped looking at Daniel outside the track with anything but effusive love, and Daniel is always there looking back with his mouth open and ready to make Max laugh — and I genuinely believe they would have cared enough about each other to keep their fight contained to the environment and time period and rebuild anything lost when it’s all said and done.

It’s the eternal thesis of them, that everyone has said a million times over: they like each other so much, so genuinely, without a veneer of fakeness and PR to it. They’d like each other in any universe in any conditions, even ones where they were built to hate each other. There could still be fighting and resentment and cold shoulders, but they are not built to hate each other, and that’s why I like them so much.

#ask #i wrote this in the shower and it’s been the world’s longest shower #so sorry to the environment #maxiel

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

Don't expect a call | Xavier Thorpe x Addams!Reader

Summary: Your and Xavier's relationship unexpectedly turn into something else over the summer

Word count: 1.9k

Request: 6, 9, 22 with xavier please!! I'm dying to see what you will write with them, knowing how awesome your works in general are! Have a good day 💜 ‘‘Would you just shut up and kiss me already.’‘ + “I wasn’t done kissing you.” + ‘’How can you be so blind?’’

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

Following the death of Principal Weems, the rest of the semester was canceled and everyone went home. Students and parents crowded the hall with their suitcases, making it difficult to navigate. Lurch would be picking you and Wednesday up, but you needed to find your sister first.

Your shoulder was still tender from the arrow you took during the battle against Crackstone, but it was healing well. There will undoubtedly be a scar, but nothing too noticeable.

Your eyes searched for a pink blob, figuring Wednesday would be with Enid. Since the battle, the two have been attached to the hip.

During your search, your eyes fell on Xavier at the top of the stairs, leaning against the railing. He waved and you lifted your eyebrows. What could he want?

The heels of your shoes clicked as you walked up the stairs and made your way to Xavier. You and him had started on the wrong foot at your arrival at Nevermore, but you were good now.

A smile grew on his face when you appeared in his sightline, happy to see you were on your two feet and well. He tried to visit you at the infirmary, but you were already gone when he showed up.

''I heard you're a free man now,'' you said flatly.

Xavier nodded once. ''Yep. All charges dismissed.''

Although you weren't the one who wrongly framed him, you felt a little responsible for the time he spent behind bars. Wednesday needed to apologize for what she put him through. Those days and nights he spent in the small cell must've been long, sad and lonely — even for a solitaire like Xavier.

''I got you something. It's a thank you for taking that arrow for me. You didn't have to do that.'' He handed you a black box with a matching ribbon, trying to conceal how smitten he was for you. ''Welcome to the 21st century, Addams.''

You opened the top, impressed by the fancy wrapping, and revealed the small object inside the box: a brand new and shiny cell phone. Your eyes shifted to the gift giver.

''My number's in there already.''

''It's bold of you to assume I would need it.'' You closed the box. ''I hope you don't expect me to call you.''

Xavier shook his head. He would be waiting forever. ''No. Never. But I'd settle for a text, though.''

''Goodbye, Xavier.''

*

For the first weeks of being home, you ignored every one of his texts. You made it look like you didn't care, but deep down you were very happy to get a message from him. Thing kept telling you it was rude to not answer and that you should text him back, but Xavier knew to expect nothing from you. You doubted he was offended by your silence.

After a full month of silence, you started giving him short answers once in a while. He was surprised the first time you replied. He even sent you a shocked emoji of his face. But you had to tell him that the quote he was reciting was wrong.

And, you were starting to miss him. Just a little.

One late evening, you found yourself looking him up on social media. There were mostly artsy pictures of tubes of paint and dirty brushes, paintings, a garden you assumed to be in his backyard, and the most recent, a selfie of him and Ajax. According to the posting date, it had been taken a few days ago. You noticed Xavier's hair had gotten longer. He was now able to do a full ponytail without having shorter pieces falling out at the front.

He looked handsome.

*

Summer came, and so did Enid. After begging her parents to let her take a flight across the country to visit you and Wednesday — mostly Wednesday —, they finally agreed. Her mom said it was her reward for finally wolfing out, which sounded wrong to your ears.

Your parents were surprised when they saw her coming out of the Addams' black Cadillac, looking the exact opposite of their daughters, but they grew fond of her very quickly. After two days, she was already part of the family.

While Wednesday was slowly and secretly falling for the sweet werewolf who favored the color pink, you caught yourself developing feelings for Xavier. He had taught you how to make video calls and it was so much better than texting.

''What is this called again?'' you asked, seeing Xavier's face through the small screen.

''Facetime.''

''Oh. Yes.'' You always forgot the name. ''I like this.'' I like seeing you.

Xavier smiled, his dimples poking through his cheeks.

You began talking about the black dahlias you grew in your mother's greenhouse and although Xavier didn't know shit about plants and flowers, he listened to everything you had to say. He loved listening to your voice.

As summer went on, it was getting more and more difficult for him to hide his feelings. Even through a screen. He was falling hard for you. But you didn't like him that way and, although he deeply wished you would feel the same, he respected that. He liked you so much that he just wanted to be around you — or in your life —, including being okay with being placed in the friendzone, even if that was obviously the last place he wanted to be.

*

The leaves began changing colors and Lurch drove the Addams clan to the academy. A single black dahlia rested on your lap, which earned a confused look from your sister. If you wanted to bring flowers to your dorm, wouldn't it have been more practical to bring a pot?

You ignored her question and went back to looking out the window until the gates of Nevermore Academy came in sight. A strange feeling bubbled in your stomach and your mother didn't fail to notice the slight twitch of your lips.

After saying goodbye to your parents and Pugsley, Wednesday left to find Enid and your eyes searched the quad for Xavier. You spotted his best friend, and found the green eyed artist by his side.

A small smile curled on your lips, but you quickly composed yourself. To make up, you gave a death stare to the first year boy on your right. He quickly hung his head down. It wasn't nice, but you had a reputation to maintain.

Raising your eyes back to Xavier, you watched as he laughed at something Ajax must have said. It was nice to see him in person and not trapped in a tiny phone screen.

You smoothed your dress and went to him. ''Hi.''

Xavier's attention snapped the second you opened your mouth, a melody to his ears. ''Hi,'' he greeted back, trying to fight the smile on his face but failing.

Beside him, Ajax bit back a snicker, then excused himself.

''This is for you,'' you said, handing him the black dahlia you were holding. ''Grown in my personal greenhouse.''

A soft flush coloring his cheeks. Xavier acted standoffish with everyone, but you had him wrapped around your little finger.

A misogynist would be offended, saying men offer flowers to women. Not Xavier.

He accepted the single flower and twirled it between his fingers. ‘’It’s beautiful. Looks more a deep burgundy and a deep mahogany than black, though.’’

You scoffed lightly. ‘’Trying to impress me with your artist vocabulary?’’

‘’Is it working?’’

‘’No.’’

The corner of his mouth curled.

He would never admit it out loud, but Xavier loved when you’re mean to him. Your blunt honesty and one-liners that knocked people off their pedestals was part of your personality and he found it endearing.

Xavier's phone alarm went off and his smile fell. He fished the device out of his pocket, then read the reminder with a disappointed face. ‘’I gotta go. I have a video appointment with my therapist in ten minutes.’’

You didn't want him to leave, but you couldn't hold him back.

‘’Okay. I'll see you later.’’

‘’Do you...want to walk with me to the dormitory?’’ Xavier asked, holding his breath as he waited for your answer.

You gave him a single nod and headed toward the right aisle of the Academy.

As you were walking, Xavier’s arm could brush yours from time to time. Each time it did, you felt spiders in your stomach. You could smell his cologne too. A mix of pine and something else you couldn't decipher.

‘’After Dr. Kinbott's death and everything that followed, my father was quick to find me a new therapist. An expensive one that would fix all of his son’s crazies in the most secrecy.’’ Xavier scoffed, shaking his head at his father's terrible parenting. ’’She’s been helping me deal with the aftermath of my arrest and put order into my thoughts. I thought my life would go back to how it was before I got arrested, but it didn’t. Although I was proven innocent, some still believe I murdered those people.’’

‘’Tyler was the monster—’’ you quickly said.

‘’I know.’’ He dropped his head, his next words quieter. ‘’But I guess it’s easier to believe an outcast did it than the sheriff’s ‘normie’ son...’’

This made your heart ache for Xavier. He may be obstinate and irrational at times, but he would never murder somebody. Especially not Rowan, who he used to call his roommate and friend. They had a fallout a little before his death, but nothing that would have pushed Xavier to kill him.

If you heard anyone say something bad about him, they better run or they'll know what you're capable of. The Addams were known to be crazy, but you preferred to say wildly devoted to the ones you love — whether it be a friend, a family member or a lover. There's nothing you wouldn't do to defend or protect the ones you cared about.

You were snapped out of your thoughts when you reached the boys' dormitory.

That walk was over way too soon.

‘’Xavier?’’ He shifted his green eyes down at you, your height difference more apparent when you were standing close. ‘’Before we part, there's something I need to tell you.’’

He drew his eyebrows, a wash of concern over his face. ‘’I’m listening.’’

‘’This summer has been revealing for me. I found in you a friend I didn't know I needed. I've always been a lonely person and I'm comfortable that way, but it's nice to have a friend. But as the days and weeks went by, I found myself looking forward to your every text and call and sometimes, I never wanted them to end,’’ you admitted transparently. ‘’It took me a while to figure out why I was feeling that way and why I always had spiders in my stomach every time someone mentioned your name. Xavier, I…I think I want us to be more than friends. I don’t know if that’s how I’m supposed to say it, but—’’

Just like in those horrifying normies rom-coms, Xavier crashed his lips on yours, interrupting you with a kiss.

You took a few seconds to react, not expecting him to do this, but then responded to his kiss, standing on your tiptoes and curling a hand behind his neck to pull him closer. Xavier’s lips moved over yours with extreme softness, kissing you the way he always wanted to.

You pulled back for air, finding yourself smiling when seeing a smudge of your lipstick on his face. It wasn’t that noticeable, but you liked that it was there. ‘’I've never been in love before, so I cannot promise you I'll be a perfect lover—’’

Xavier shook his head. ‘’I don't care. Perfect is boring anyway.’’ He held back a grin, pressing his forehead against yours. ''I prefer spooky and kooky.''

—

Wednesday taglist: @sofiaadler @partyfly @hoodforcalum @thelilacmourning @ellessecretobsession @su-alteza-emia @achoo—uu @not-leaprvt @xaviersgf @peterparkerdilf @roadworkaheadisurehopeitdoes @dragon-chica @coldtacozinepanda @wrldofsage @eddiemunsonsluvrrr @capriaura @officialsaturn @babyfiva @maevaomizzolo @kelloggs-world @whosljt @ajpanda181 @belovedrey @emerycrt @elizabitchsshit @heaven-hiding @lilithlikestoread @est-liber @moonisu @dessxoxsworld @parker-nite @bellblake121890 @vesperazhier @kaldurahms-lover @beeebo234 @nephilimsss @mayuphoenix @sweetheartlizzie07 @watermelon-18 @snixx2088 @555stargirl555 @robinscardigan @chumchum19 @lilttblog @aphex2winn @heizenka @mystargirl-interlude @hwrtsiren @babygirljay20 @wildflowerlyss @strangersomeone @openfandoms @charlottelaffin @iheartmaddyperez @starless-starkov @ali-r3n  @poppet05  @ell0ra-br3kk3r

 @rhaenyraswife  @teaganthemorningstar  @aphex2winn @moompie  @ifevilwhyhot @oliviah-25 @spenglerslime @wetwilliam02 @yellowcupcakes @haileyismoo @theyslayallday @wrldofsage @manofworm @rhydianissuperior @supersanelyromantic @nicangel13 @toylewestinnyc @meme-queen-1999 @rottenstyx @mxxny-lupin @idli-dosa @silenzju @ar40s @sweeterheartxamerica @renaissancewhxre @jordierama @lilppsblog @harrystylesfp  @katsuki420 @ravenssh1t @izzy-laufeyson @iluvwomenblog @kenzi-woycehoski @arunaposeidondottie @liidiaaag  @lilaconner @katsukis1wife @momoewn  @amithesimpoffandoms @chaotic-fangirl-blog @hawkegfs  @lyxrix @mommyruuetrue  @acornacreacure @lucassinclairsgf @youdontneedtoknowthisinformation @aabananaa @starrrslove @marissapearle @sshesang @scarxvodka  @xoxo-zainab @illf4iry  @yourfavdummy @leoluvsur-pappy @kcskye123 @wenvierismycomfort @pedrosprincess @luvvtxinityy @targaryenmoony @icarly23 

All and more taglist: @spiokybirdstarfish @kenqki @liidiaaag @hawkegfs  @gillybear17  @areaderinlove @acornacreacure @black-rose-29 @fudge13 @cece05 @rosie-cameron @Caxddce @laylasbunbunny @gemofthenight @beautyb1ade  @hi-bored-as-fcuk-rn  @lovelyy-moonlight @mellabella101 @vxnity713  @marzipaanz

#xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe imagine #xavier thorpe x you #wednesday #wednesday imagine

[stop-talking]

Honestly? I'm not surprised the FNAF movie is delayed.

They're DEFINETLY struggling to come up with a plot for the next movie. They planned to make three movies if the first went well, but they didn't really leave themselves much room for a sequel.

What do I mean by that? Well...

• The driving conflict of the first movie, that got Mike to work at Freddy's in the first place, was the custody battle with aunt Jane. But they fucking killed her off. (In the movie, it seems like it's possible she still may be alive, but in the book it's pretty much confirmed she's dead.) Abby sees her "lying in a puddle of ketchup" or something when golden freddy comes to get her. And I have a direct quote from Mike.

"You know," he said, "I think my aunt has finally decided to move on." I mean... she kind of did, Mike thought. (Pg 317)

• Oh, and also in the book, it's said Mike gets a nice new job as a contractor after the events at Freddy's, so it's not like they can pull the "Mike can't find a job so he HAS to work at another Freddy's location!" thing again.

• AND, they resolved his storyline with Garrett. He's found the killer, and watched him die. (Even if we know he's not dead). Mike realized Abby is much more important than his dead brother and he no longer torments himself with thoughts of Garrett... so I don't think he'd go poking around in another Freddy's location to "figure out what happened". He knows what happened. And he's finally over it.

• It seems like they TRIED to give themselves something to work with in the end credits. You know, the "C O M E F I N D M E". But honestly? It's not all that helpful. There's no clear way to tell who it's addressed to or who it's from. Everyone seems to agree it's Garrett speaking to Mike as the puppett, but honestly? That doesn't make sense to me.

• I've already explained that I don't think Mike is interested in learning more about his brother's death. He knows who killed him, and watched that man die. Mike is as "at peace" as he's ever going to get. Besides, I don't think Garrett is the puppett!! At all!!

• In the movie, Mike says he feels closer to Garrett at Freddy's. I think that means his soul is LITERALLY there, in THAT Freddy's location. Why else would he say that? Just because there are ghosts there killed by the same man? Also, in the novel, Mike literally sees Garrett's ghost in the pizzeria and it leads him to Springtrap. Finally, the "It's me" messages that keep appearing near Mike. Who else would be writing that shit? It's not just a little Easter egg for the audience. It has to be someone Mike knows. Garrett. (Also I think there's a strong argument to be made that Garrett is co-posessing Golden Freddy with the little blonde boy)

• SO THEN, WHO IS SAYING "COME FIND ME," AND WHO ARE THEY TALKING TO?

Honestly? No clue. But I think there are a few interesting directions they could take things.

1) From Mike's dad, to Mike.

In the movie they sort of imply Mike's dad offed himself, but in the book they reveal he just walked out on them. So he's still out there somewhere, and they could totally reveal he had some kind of connection to Freddy's and William, and it would explain why William drove all the way to goddamn Nebraska to kidnap some random ass kid.

2) From springtrap, to some unfortunate soul dumb enough to set him free

In the games, he was locked away in a bricked off room for like 30 years before being set free, but I don't think these movies are going to have that big of a time skip. Probably a year at most. So I could see the next movie starting with some idiot freeing springtrap.

3) Okay yeah I cant think of anything else.

And I know I'm not a professional screenplay writer but those bitches are anxiously struggling too!! In every interview where Josh Hutcherson (Mike) has been asked about a sequel, he says they're still trying to figure out the story. No shit!! They didn't give themselves anything to work with.

• So basically, Mike has absolutely no reason to go back to another Freddy's location, and the little secret message at the end is almost too vague to be useful.

So, what DID they leave themselves to work with in the next movie? What plot points remain unresolved?

• For one thing, they didn't even give William a fucking motive for killing kids. Or for luring security guards to their deaths. This version of him seems to have a much better understanding of remnant and possession that his game counterpart, but there's no reason given for that either. In the game, he does it all for his dead son. He wants to "fix" him. But they didn't set up any hints to that in the first movie. Mike talked to Vanessa about HIS dead brother, so I feel like if the whole "dead son" thing was the case, she would have mentioned she lost a sibling too.

• Or maybe William would have brought it up at the end when he was getting mad at Vanessa. The "mess YOU created!!" scene. He probably would have said something like, "You know why we have to do this, Vanessa." But he didn't. There's literally no known motive, and it'll be kind of hard to set one up without any breadcrumbs left in the previous movie.

• Mike was TOTALLY falling for Vanessa in the books. Yeah, I know, a lot of people feel FNAF isn't a place for romance, and SCHMELLY isn't a very popular ship... but that doesn't change the face he almost kissed her in the novel. (Also in the book she threw his EMPTY PILL BOTTLE into the river, didn't actually toss bro's meds! So she's a little more likeable!)

"Vanessa and Mike grinned at each other, and Mike felt something zing inside of him. It was a palpable 'wow' feeling that was much more intense than his casual appreciation of her beauty. And the zing felt like it was going both ways. The look Vanessa was giving Mike was one he hadn't ever seen before... not directed at him anyway. Her reciprocation of his feelings was so strong that he felt himself leaning toward her." (pg 186)

(They didn't kiss though, Vanessa blushed and looked away and changed the subject.) Still... now they have to address their little romantic subplot in the next movie as well.

• Vanessa. Just as a character. There's a lot to work with there. Personally, I think it would be interesting to use her coma to tell a story. You know, have her flashback to there's childhood with William and at Freddy's. (Honestly if they don't do that they're dumb and missing a huge opportunity. Why else put her in the goddamn coma?)

• Also, in the novel, they heavily implied she's... a robot? Apparently, her eyes drastically change color and Mike notes she flips from "girl mode" to "cop mode" on a dime. In the movie she just looked bipolar.

"Yeah Abby, let's use the tables for the fort! 😄"

"Mike if you bring her here again I will SHOOT YOU. 🤬"

• But yeah apparently she's a robot. A robot so convincing that even hospital nurses and doctors can't tell. With no explanation for how William could have built that. Or why there's a photo of her and William where she's clearly a child. Did he build a child robot that grew up into an adult woman robot? Or did he build two robots? Or did child Vanessa die and he replaced her with a robot? Who knows!

"Mike watched, mesmerized, as Vanessa's irises deepened noticeably in hue. They went from their usual soft, almost greyish-blue to a deeper indigo. The shift was so pronounced it almost looked computer-generated. It was also enormously disquieting. Mike felt like he was watching a human turn into..." (pg 184)

• So for the next move, Mike has no motive to go visit Freddy's, William has no motive in general, and Vanessa is a robot. The script practically writes itself, am I right??

And then there's the way Scott Cawthon likes to incorporate fan feedback into all of his projects.

(Ex: People complained FNAF 3 wasn't scary, so he made FNAF 4 horrifying)

• I have no doubt he's going to incorporate the fanbase's favorite characters into the next movie. (Ness, Doug, Maxine, Jeremy) Which honestly just complicates the plot further, adding more stipulations to the script.

• Bringing Ness back would be easy? Mike and Abby could have a scene in the diner, I guess, but it's also sort of unnecessary, and I'm not sure MatPat would agree to another cameo. He's retired.

• Bringing Doug back would be more complicated. He's aunt Jane's lawyer... but they fuckin' killed her off. So. Doug is not needed.

• Jeremy could come back? Maybe? He's really a background character... It's not stated whether or not Mike was friends with him outside work, or kept in touch with him after being fired.

• Maxine is a lot more complicated. The actress who plays her, Kathryn Sterling, said herself that she was originally supposed to have a bigger role in the film but it got trimmed down. And THEN there's the way she was stuffed into a purple Freddy suit, which a lot of fans theorize is supposed to be Shadow Freddy. On her TikTok, she basically confirms this, hinting to her character coming back in the next movie and being more important.

So in the next movie...

1) Mike has to somehow have to end up tangled back into Freddy Fazbullshit even though he has NO desire to... (Remember the way he looked at Abby when she asked if they could visit them??)

2) They have to reveal or at least hint towards Vanessa being a robot

3) Mike & Vanessa romance subplot??

4) William needs a fucking motive for killing people

5) The audience needs to be able to tell who "come find me" was said by AND who it was directed towards

6) Bonus points if they can cram in more youtuber cameos & beloved characters from the last movie like Jeremy and Doug

--------------------------------------------------

So yeah. It's a lot to consider when writing. And the clock is ticking, because kids, especially little kids like Garrett's actor, grow up FAST. And ghost kids aren't supposed to grow up. Ghost kids are supposed to be dead.

I do want to say though, that despite the plot holes, I LOVE the FNAF movie. I've watched it 20+ times. It's genuinely one of my comfort movies. I'm excited for the next movie, but I'm also sort of expecting it to be late 2025 before we get to see it.

Scott is notoriously picky. He turned down, like, 8 scripts for the first movie before settling on the Mike storyline. I don't mind waiting, especially considering how difficult this next movie is gonna be to write. Also if you read this whole rant?? Damn?? Kiss me on the mouth rn.

#josh hutcherson #jhutch #mike schmidt #fnaf movie #fnaf movie theory #fnaf theory #fnaf theories #fnaf movie 2023 #micheal schmidt #micheal afton #maxine fnaf #doug fnaf #jeremy fnaf #william afton #purple guy #springtrap #steve raglan #fnaf william afton #vanessa shelly #vanessa afton #schmelly #mikenessa #mike x vanessa #fnaf movie novel

[sgiandubh]

Fuck this shitshow...This is it.

Dear This Is It Anon,

You mean this, right?

Lest they would think as they all collectively do, with the shared single braincell they use across the street, we are hiding shite under the carpet. Not my method, Anon, off - and online.

So, ok. He was there. We were on perhaps the worst case scenario, probability-wise, on that one: 50/50, which is sort of mildly excruciating, right?

I can only encourage you to watch that clip, Anon. There are always nuances in the worst of bullshit situations. Yes, she is smiling. Briefly to T (this page founds a lie beyond ridiculous) and then to the winner:

Yes, she looks relaxed enough. But never forget she is an actress, after all, at a professional event. What did you expect her to do, sulk? I know, it happened before, when she was perhaps way less thrilled, but people change and they learn from their mistakes. Narrative wise, her being awkward around McElusive was a PR mistake that had to be corrected/properly retconned. This seems to be the case, now, with a more natural attitude.

But you can fumble around and manipulate only that much of a given situation. The giveaway, to me, in this is TMcG (the hour is solemn, no jokes around, please) - still the same unkempt, DGAF, 70s called outfit, plus looking really, really strange. Unlike many on our side, I shall not elaborate - there is no need to. Yet it is plain to see something is unwell, especially when compared to the cortisone prosperity of the last sighting. Don't get me wrong: I have no ill wish towards this person. I just can't help but notice something is amiss, in all this forced, calculated, propagandistic Joy.

I am also fully aware there are many mean eyes watching me from the shadows across the street, Anon. I mean, seriously, BIF?

Of course, that is your page and you can write what the hell you want. Choosing to quote me was a rather successful ambush. Remember, however (really LOL, always LOL): wars are not won with just tactics. Ok, you have a questionable edge on this one - a wasted battle.

Wars are won with good strategy and a synoptic, not fragmented vision (making a huge affair out of each and every single detail), of the state of play. You may be a decent tactician, perhaps, but you are a lousy strategist.

Oh, and to think you are planning a get together at the Paris Landcon, too, eh? How nice and how copy/paste of you, folks. I wonder what you expect, a fucking remake of West Side Story?

I could say good afternoon and even shake your hand anytime, BIF. But I bet you wouldn't. You're a tiny, hateful person with an overinflated ego, like that.

Sorry, Anon, for the rant. I tried to be as objective as I could, under biased circumstance and harsh scrutiny. I just hope this brought more clarity.

#anon #fandom #shitshow

[awkwardauthorwrites]

Protector

Based on this request: I was wondering if you could write maybe some angst with fluff about how you and Sebastian are fighting against a villain and he takes the blow for you? thank you so much

Word Count: 2.6k

Themes: angst, fluff. Fem!Reader

Warnings: All characters aged up to 18+. Potential spoilers for HL

“How are you not tired, yet?” Sebastian glared over his shoulder at Y/N, who currently had her back pressed up against his in a defensive position. They had severely underestimated the size of the camp, as they had been fighting the bandits for the better part of an hour and they were only just beginning to thin out. Y/N just let out a laugh and shot a well-timed glacius-diffindo combination at the Ashwinder scout in front of her, eyes meeting his briefly so he could see the mischief that danced in them. 

“Honestly, compared to what I usually go through, this whole situation has felt more like a leisurely stroll than a fierce battle.” Ancient magic surged at Y/N’s fingertips and she wiggled them experimentally, a sly smile on her face as she raised her hand in the air and called lightning down to hit the group in front of them. Sebastian would never admit it, but sometimes the sheer immensity of her power terrified him. It was breathtaking to watch, but seeing an Ashwinder disappear before his very eyes in nothing but a cloud of red mist was unnerving to say the least.

An Ashwinder duellist stepped towards the pair, waving their wand to cast a shield around themselves. A barrel flew past him, guided by Y/N’s ability, and smashed through it, stunning the duellist for a brief moment. Sebastian should have used the seconds bought to bring the attacker down, but instead he flung a shield up around Y/N as a spellbinder shot a spell at her. The duellist cackled, eyes narrowing as they took note of Sebastian’s attempts to protect Y/N, no doubt trying to find a way to exploit it.

“Reducto!”

“Diffindo!” Sebastian interrupted the cast with a severing charm, chuckling as the duellist was spun around and the curse hit a member of their team instead.

“You’re brilliant,” Y/N laughed, her hand reaching behind her to squeeze his arm briefly. 

“Next time you want to sneak out of the castle we’re going to the Three Broomsticks for a drink.”

“First rounds on me,” Y/N twirled her wand between her fingers expertly and narrowly dodged a disarming charm an Ashwinder executioner threw her way. “You’ll have to do better than that,” she taunted.

“Y/N, please do not antagonise the angry murderers who are attacking us,” Sebastian groaned. He couldn’t help but shake his head in amusement as she laughed and cast expelliarmus at the executioner, causing him to lose control over the lightning storm he was summoning. Y/N tugged them both aside as the lightning crackled too close for comfort and took cover behind a tent. 

“You’re no fun.” Her chest was heaving from exertion but there was a spark to her eyes he hadn’t seen in a while. 

“Wasn’t it you who told me fun was relative?” Sebastian, Y/N noted, looked unfairly wellkept considering how long they had been fighting. Her hair had fallen from its updo a while ago and she dreaded having to work the tangles out of it later. Meanwhile, while he may have been more out of breath than her, Sebastian looked as if he had exerted no more energy than he would on a pleasant walk around the lake that bordered their school.

“And this is relatively fun,” she shot him a sinful grin as she quoted him and ducked back into the fray. Although he tried to look annoyed, Sebastian couldn’t help but chuckle, unable to deny her contagious enthusiasm. He shot a particularly vicious confringo at an explosive barrel that was located coincidentally close to a handful of soldiers, taking them all down in one go, before turning to watch Y/N as she levitated three men at once and summoned them towards her before blasting them away again with a particularly powerful bombarda. 

“Remind me never to get on your bad side,” Sebastian let out a low whistle, eyes darting around to look for any more enemies. Y/N scoffed and rolled her eyes in response, looking across the quiet camp for any more Ashwinders who may have been lurking in the shadows. “Do you see Mr Pippin's chest anywhere?” 

“I mean,” Y/N looked around, taking note of several chests dotted around the camp. “Revelio.” The spell lit the chests up, not pointing to any of them in particular. “Yeah I didn’t think it would be that easy,” Y/N sighed and began to make her way to the closest container when a loud crack echoed through the air around them. 

“What have you done?” The Ashwinder boss roared at them, eyes full of rage as he took note of the destruction around them.

“Whoops?” Y/N offered. Sebastian grimaced and pinched the bridge of his nose at her casual tone.

“Whoops?” he repeated, glaring down at her. “We have an Ashwinder boss in front of us, potentially ready to end our lives for what we did to their camp, and all you can say is whoops?”

“What do you want me to - ” Y/N started to protest, only to be cut off by the boss.

“Enough. You’ll pay for this. Both of you. Crucio!” The Ashwinder boss pointed his wand at Y/N, a vile grin on his features. Red sparks flickered at the end of the stick and time seemed to slow as a bolt of red lightning zigzagged its way across the field in her direction.

“No!” Y/N fell to the ground, her palms scraping the rough stone surface as Sebastian shoved her out of the way. She watched in horror as the curse hit him instead and could have sworn her heart stopped in her chest as he fell to his knees, arm clutching his stomach. 

“Sebastian!” The scream ripped out of Y/N’s throat as she scrambled over the gravel to reach him. The arm that had been holding him up faltered and he fell to the ground with a loud yell that echoed around them. Y/N felt her stomach lurch as the boss cackled.

“Avada - ” He never got a chance to finish the killing curse. White hot rage filled every inch of Y/N’s body and ancient magic lashed out, no longer in her control as it found its target. She was vaguely aware of the sickening crunch as their enemy’s body collapsed in on itself and fell limply to the floor in a tangle of limbs.

Sebastian grunted in pain as he rolled over onto his back, the curse finally subsiding now that his attacker was dead. Y/N reached out for him hesitantly, only to recoil as his arm twitched violently - an after effect of the lightning coursing through his body. She wanted nothing more than to gather him in her arms and make sure he was okay but could still remember how painful it had been all those years ago when he had cast the same curse on her. How the pain had lingered in her bones, her very soul, far longer than she ever let him know. Tears spilled down her face as she watched helplessly as the spasms finally ended and he lay there breathing heavily, a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead.

“Sebastian,” she hesitantly reached out for him and gently pulled her head to rest on her lap when he didn’t flinch away from her. “Why did you do that?” she brushed his hair out of his face and used the hem of her cloak to wipe away his sweat. “How could you be so stupid?”

“I couldn’t watch you in pain,” he groaned. “Not like that. Not again.” A harsh cough left his mouth, followed by a wince, before he looked up at her. “Why are you crying?” he raised a shaky hand up, as if to wipe away her tears and she watched, heart clenching in terror, as it fell limply to his side.

“Sebastian? Sebastian!”

*~*~*~*~*

A small part of Sebastian was convinced he had died as he floated in and out of a painless sleep. He was having the strangest dream, he thought to himself as he looked at the dryad who was fast asleep at his bedside, clutching his hand in hers as if it were her lifeline. He followed the lines of her half covered face and itched to run his hands through her long, green tresses. She shifted, moving the light with her, and he watched in fascination and confusion as her features morphed and her hair slowly cycled through various shades of colour until he recognised the woman asleep beside him.

“Y/N.” He squeezed her hand with what little strength he had left and watched as she slowly came to.

“Sebastian?” she murmured, still half-asleep. The hand that wasn’t holding on his rubbed at her eyes tiredly and she suddenly sat up as she realised he was awake. “Oh thank Merlin, you’re awake - ” Y/N looked as if she were about to fling herself on him in an embrace, but stopped as she realised she would only hurt him more. “Are you okay? Do you need me to get Nurse Blainey?”

“I’m fine,” he gently tugged at her hand so she would sit at the end of his bed. “How did you get me here?” Sebastian remembered jumping in front of the spell, not thinking about anything except for protecting Y/N; he had watched her writhe in pain once from the torture curse and he silently vowed to himself she would never have to go through that again as long as he was around. He couldn’t remember much after the Cruciatus Curse had hit him, apart from the blinding agony he felt.

“I apparated us as close to the castle as I could get and levitated you the rest of the way. Blainey wasn’t exactly pleased - or surprised - that I woke her in the middle of the night. She’s going to talk to Black and Weasley first thing in the morning. I don’t quite have your level of charm, I suppose.”

“You’re plenty charming when you want to be,” Sebastian squeezed her hand gently before slowly sitting up in the hospital cot. “Did you tell her what happened?”

“I didn’t have to - she knew immediately. Apparently I’ve earned a reputation for having students jump in front of curses for me,” Y/N rolled her eyes and fixed him with a glare. “Which was a completely stupid thing for you to do, might I add.”

“Hey,” he gave her a reproachful look and watched as she stood up, “I technically just saved you. You could be a little nicer.”

“I didn’t ask you to do that.”

“Are you mad at me?” 

“Are you feeling better?”

“I…I guess I’m a little sore but all things considered, yes, I’m better,” Sebastian’s eyebrow furrowed in confusion as he watched her pace up and down. 

“Well then, I’m furious.” Y/N stopped in front of his bed, eyes blazing with anger. “Don’t you ever do that again.”

“Protect you?”

“I don’t need protection!” her loud words echoed in the too-quiet room and Sebastian watched as her chest heaved in annoyance. “What if he shot a curse that was worse than crucio? What if he - ” Y/N broke off with a sob and fresh tears fell down her face. Sebastian thought the Cruciatus curse would be the nastiest kind of agony he had ever felt for the rest of his life, but seeing Y/N’s tear-stricken face and knowing he was the cause sent a crack through his heart.

“Y/N…” he came to a shaky stand and tried to reach out for her, but she shook her head and took a step back.

“You could have been killed.” She turned away and buried her head in her hands, quiet sobs shaking her shoulders. Sebastian took a couple of apprehensive steps towards her and placed a hand on her shoulder. She turned and flung herself at him, her arms wrapping tightly around him as she cried into his chest. “I can’t lose you.”

“I’m here.” Sebastian felt a piece of his heart shatter and pulled her into a much needed, tight embrace. There was a burning sensation behind his eyes as he wound one arm around her waist and threaded the other into her hair, holding her in place against him. “I’m okay.” He kissed the top of her forehead as tears slipped out of his own eyes. 

“This time.” Y/N meant for her words to come out sharp, for them to sting, but instead he took one of her hands and held it against his chest, right above his heart. 

“I’m okay,” he repeated softly. “See? It’s still beating for you.”

“Don’t be cute at a time like this,” she glared at him but the blow didn’t quite land as intended when he caught sight of her tear stained face. He smiled gently at her and wiped her tears away, using the sleeve of his robe to dry her face.

“Okay.”

“And never do anything that stupid again.”

“I promise not to jump in front of a curse that will cause you debilitating pain ever again.”

“Sebastian.”

“Okay, okay. I promise. Anything else?”

“One more thing.” She used his tie to tug him towards her and placed a too-quick kiss on his lips. “If you ever, and I mean ever, so much as think about doing something so stupid again, I will make you wish you never taught me all three of the unforgivable curses,” she muttered against his lips. Sebastian blinked at her, his emotions torn between being frightened by her threat and flustered by the kiss. 

“Duly noted,” he nodded, nose bumping hers gently before he leant back in to kiss her again.

“I mean it Sallow,” she pulled away from him, a blush rising to her cheeks. “I don’t need you to protect me and I will not hesitate to crucio you myself if you do that again.”

“Y/N,” he groaned, head landing on her shoulder gently. “I will promise you the entire world if you want it, but for now would you please stop talking and just let me kiss you back.”

“Only if you kiss me like you mean it.” Y/N fiddled with the knot in his tie as she avoided his gaze, suddenly looking very unsure of herself. A part of Sebastian wanted to berate her for it - how could she not tell that was all he wanted since the moment she bested him in their first duel two years ago? That she was the only person he ever wanted to kiss, the only one he wanted to be with? He may have had a few dalliances since meeting her (and he knew she did too) but it had always been her right from the very first moment.

“Darling,” he tilted her head up gently so he could look her in the eye, “later I’ll tell you all about how you’re the only one I’ve ever wanted, but right now I can definitely promise you that I mean it.” He closed the gap between them, trying to be a gentleman as he kissed her sweetly to convey how he felt about her, but Y/N was having none of it as she tugged at his hair and wrapped herself around him, her lips moving against his in frantic desperation. He groaned as she caught his lower lip between his teeth and tugged at it gently, causing Sebastian to reluctantly pull away from the kiss to look down at her, his eyes roaming over her tousled hair and swollen lips. “Easy now, we have the rest of our lives for that.”

“I like the sound of that.”

#sebastian sallow fanfiction #sebastian sallow x y/n #sebastian sallow x you #sebastian sallow x reader #sebastian sallow #sebastian sallow fluff #sebastian sallow angst #sebastian sallow x fem!reader #hogwarts game #hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry #hogwarts #hogwarts legacy #sebastian sallow x gryffindor!reader #sebastian sallow x hufflepuff!reader #sebastian sallow x slytherin!reader #sebastian sallow x ravenclaw!reader #awkwardauthormasterlist #awkwardauthorwrites #awkwardauthor #awkwardauthorrequests

[blackbleedingrose]

Okay, so I have this Hazbin Hotel Lucifer x reader request idea, but have no idea how to actually write it out and would love to see someone else's take on it. It's a little long and may require several parts, but I'm hoping some people may be interested in writing it. I'm putting this here to see if someone is interested in writing such a long, and possibly detailed, request. I'm totally open to any changes and add ins they might want to add in, but I do have a very specific quote and idea I want in it. This is what it is:

The reader is a sinner who suffers from severe depression, but is really good at masking it. When she was alive she lived with her family who treated her horribly but she did everything to be useful to them and make them love her. Since the pilot of Hazbin had superheroes/villains I'm going to say her family was a renowned hero family, but she was often hidden from the public as to not embarrass them. She had a guy friend that was a hero in training who idolized her father and she fell in love with him, which he knew and used to his advantage to get close to her dad. He knew of the horrible things her family did, such as lock her away as punishment if she did something they didn't approve of - like secretly helping on missions. Then one day a mission went wrong and her being there distracted her father causing him to get killed. Her family turned their backs on her and so did her friend who told her if should have been her. They lock her away with no way of her getting out. In her loneliness, guilt, and confinement, she spirals and eventually kills herself believing she deserves it. Since suicide is a sin, she's sent to Hell where she's eventually found by Charlie who offers her a room at the hotel. During her time there, she masks her depression well not wanting to talk about her past much afraid of the judgement and rejection. When she meets Lucifer for the first time, when he first comes to the hotel in ep 5, he immediately recognizes what she's doing being familiar with it himself. They don't talk much at first, but Lucifer is interested in what's she's hiding and secretly wanting to talk to someone who understands what it's like to have depression. During her time at the hotel she slowly becomes accustomed to everyone, not used to being treated nicely but appreciating it. Then during the final battle with Adam, she fights alongside everyone using her past training to her advantage. But when Sir Pentious dies, she becomes angry seeing her friend die and fiercely protective so much that she protects Charlie from Adam, though gets injured in the process. She's saved from Adam by Lucifer who thanks her for protecting Charlie and angry at her injuries. After the battle, and once the hotel is fixed, she starts to open up more to everyone slowly healing herself and becoming friends with Lucifer. However, what she doesn't know is that her father and friend (who died in someway during another battle) are in Heaven as Heaven saw them as heros and good for Heavens influence and reputation. When they hear that she's down in Hell, they become worried that Heaven might find out what happened when they were all alive and ruin their reputation. So the friend sneaks down into Hell one day, when the hotel is having an open house to attract sinners and finds her alone in her room outside her balcony getting from fresh air from the party. He tries to convince her to leave this place and come up with him to Heaven, lying that they miss her and even going far as to say he loves her. This, of course, messes with her healing mind as she knows he's lying and is shock to see him. I see this scene as the clip from Euphoria when Jules says she loves Rue. The same quote and actions from Rue but as the reader. Lucifer, who was looking for her, overhears their conversation feeling his heart break hearing her words and realizing how similar the two are with her friend and Lilith. When the friends leaves after the readers says to stay out of her life, she breaks down crying to which Lucifer enters her room and starts to comfort her telling her about Lilith and that be understands and knows what it's like.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin #hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer morningstar #hazbin request #writers on tumblr #request #hazbin hotel x reader

[smooth-perceval]

“You still love me?”

Max Verstappen x Fem!Reader.

Summary: Max and reader have decided to separate for the benefit of their child. Reader and max was always arguing and they both agreed it wasn’t fair to bring their baby up that way. Only when the reader attends one of his races for their kid they realised it was a break that they needed not seperation.

Warning: Swearing, angst, Google translate, not proof read.

Key: Y/N (Your Name), Milo (Baby boy name, baby is nearly 3, slowly learning sentences)

Word count: 4,768

A/N: Max and kids is like my fav fics. Anyways, hope you enjoy this as much as I did writing it!! 🖤 maybe some movie quotes in here cause I like movies :|

When did the constant arguing happen? Pfftt no idea I couldn’t tell you. What I could tell you is that I have had enough.

I had enough of playing the waiting game and making excuses for Max’s absence in his own little boys life. We tried attending majority of the races for Max, and even the ones we could attended we might as well been at home, we would’ve seen more of Max on the tv.

Whenever I brought up this situation with Max, he always would shout about “Being world champion” and that “I have a priority to the team” which I would always clip back with ��What about your priority of being a father?” To then he would slam the door on my face and go on his simulator, or end the call on me.

It was the same shit different day, it was just killing me knowing this is all effecting our Milo. The countless days and nights of me lying for Max, it was getting tiring wiping our baby’s eyes, and promising him his dad really does love and care for him his just busy doing championship things.

10:38pm

Still no sign of Max, no text, no call, nothing. Milo tried staying awake but the struggle was getting unbearable for him and I decided to do the battle of attempting to get him to bed.

“Come baby, it’s time for bed. Pa is busy…” scooping him up in my arms as he yawned, he started mumbling his protests and I knew it’ll be another long night… and all I could think was, damn you Max Verstappen.

After trying to settle Milo down for the last 20 or so minutes, we finally compromised Milo was going to stay in our bed, with a bowl of fruit because he really wanted it.

Finally Milo settled his head next to mine on the pillow, I was laying on my side watching him a small smile on my face. He really is perfect, his Max’s double, absolutely perfect, the temperament was defiantly the same as well, I sure had my hands full with them.

“mamma, is pa home?” His eyes diverted from the tv to me as he laid on his side also now, clearly getting tired by the way he reached his hand out putting it on the side of my face, a comfort thing he does when his tired. “Not yet baby. I’ll wake you when he does” I place my hand on top of his smiling at him leaning it kissing his nose. “Night mamma…” yawning again his eyes flutter closed as he takes a deep sigh. “Night Schat” (darling)

Once I knew Milo was fully asleep I turned the tv off and leaned over to check my phone again, still nothing…

Now yawning also, I gave up. Milo doesn’t deserve this- I don’t deserve this… all we asked for is 5 minutes of his time. But the team comes first.

01:19am

The bed dipped, and I felt Milo stir against my chest, his small arm wrapped around me as much as he could, I soon felt another arm slide over us both and a deep sigh leave the person. Opening my eyes a little I already knew who it would be.

“Don’t wake Milo.” I mumble cradling our baby.

“Nice to see you too.” He scoffed back rubbing Milo’s back.

“He waited up late again for you Max.”

“Well put him to bed earlier.”

Shushing Max I soothed Milo again, I knew I promised to wake him up but he needs to sleep. Maybe we both can’t keep our promises…

“Sorry…” Max whispered closing his eyes.

“For all of it.” He mumbled afterwards.

“I don’t care anymore…” I whispered back pushing Max arm off me… yes I did and yea I just wanted Max to hold me, but that means his won and I can’t let him win once again. Max gave in rolling onto his back and letting the sleep take him. While me? I laid awake for another hour or so just watching them both, they both looked so peaceful, Milo had clearly felt Max presence and turned over cuddling into him. As soon as Max felt him a small smile crept to his face, even while asleep… and it’s times like this that make me regret the bad thoughts I have… but I had to do it for us to work-

The next morning I slowly woke up, when I glanced over Max and Milo was still asleep, Max now on his back and Milo laying on his chest with Max’s arms both wrapped around him securely. It was an adorable image, they both looked so calm when together and again, so peaceful.

Deciding to start making Milo’s breakfast, I head downstairs knowing soon he will be awake and our little morning routine will have to start, so why not get ahead?

I started making some pancakes and fruit for him as he loves pancakes, seeing as I’m able to get 5 minutes to make them, normally once me and Milo get up his already asking for breakfast- and boy, that kid gets hangry. And boy he can eat.

Just as I was setting his food at the table I heard someone behind me.

“Morning.” I already knew it was Max, by his deep husky voice that he always gets in the mornings, and for the fact that nobody but Max was here who’s voice would be like that. “Morning.” I mumbled back going past him to wake Milo, if I don’t wake him now he won’t sleep later unfortunately.

When I opened the door to the bedroom Milo was slowly waking up, his head just rising from the pillow, like he had sensed Max not being there. I smiled at him sweetly and walked over to the bed brushing his hair back with my fingers. “Morning baby” but he couldn’t care for me being there he straight away looked around the room, “pa?”

“Pa is downstairs, you coming?” I held my hands out to Milo who stood up slowly and climbed into my arms, head resting on my shoulder. Some may say his too old to be carried but his my baby, if I could I’d carry him for the rest of my life. When his in my arms I feel like no danger could come to us.

Once I had made it back downstairs I sat Milo at the table, as he insists his a big boy and can eat like his dad. Max was sitting there already with a bowl of cereal and phone in hand.

“Papa.” Milo stared at Max a sleepy smile on his face “Hi, mijn ventje” (my boy), glancing up from his phone he smiled at Milo, there is no denying Max loves his kid with his whole heart… but Milo is still young. He needs to be shown it. Like now, putting your phone down and enjoying breakfast with one another, was that too much to ask.

“Max.” I crossed my arms over my chest staring him out. He quickly looked up with raised eyebrows. Nodding my head towards Milo with pointed eyes, praying he got the hint. However, he just looked back at Milo confused and then back at me.

With a defeated sigh, I pulled a chair out next to Milo cutting up his food a bit more and handing him his cutlery. “I need to go, shit. I didn’t realise the time.”

“But you’ve barely been here five minutes…” I looked up at him with pleading eyes praying he would just sit back down.

“Papa leaving?” Milo looked between me and Max, I could see it on Max’s face he was praying I made some excuse up.

Shaking my head I looked down at Milo food picking his fork back up for him and handing it to him. “Eat up, otherwise I’ll eat it all.” I was on the verge of tears… the point that he couldn’t even stay here for me, didn’t both me I knew I signed up for this… but Milo didn’t. Max said we was at a good time for kids, truthfully he meant it was a good time for me and not him.

Max ran off upstairs getting changed and packing a few items ready for his next trip. By then Milo had given up with food, I took his stuff out to the kitchen letting him play for a bit in the lounge.

“I’ll call you tonight, make sure Milo is awake.” Turning around Max was standing in the kitchen door way. I just stared at him, I get he has a job I do but it’s not fair-

“Don’t bother making a promise if you don’t intend to keep it.” At my response Max rolled his eyes.

“Y/N don’t start this again- I got to go.”

“So have I. Max I can’t keep doing this…”

I finally got his attention. He stepped further into the kitchen confused.

“What you mean you can’t do this?”

“I can’t keep waiting around for you, you said we could start this family yet you haven’t been here-” I already felt choked up, this wasn’t a conversation I expected to be having first thing in the morning but I knew it was brewing…

“I’m doing my job- what did you expect me to do? Drop it all because you got pregnant?” The realisation showed on Max face as soon as he said it. He stepped even closer hands out waving in front of him.

I leaned my head back trying to hold back any tears that were threatening to spill, taking a few deep breaths.

“Y/N I didn’t mean that- it was just, it just came out-”

“You needed to go Max.” I turned back around putting the last remaining cups and plates away.

“Don’t, don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Shut me out.” He now came and stood next to me, trying to get me to look at him.

“You did that in your own.” He glanced down at his watch and then quickly back up at me.

“I need to leave. We will continue this when I’m home okay? I promise.” And he just left with a quick by to Milo, who was practically chasing him out the door.

There I stood alone in the kitchen taking a few more deep breaths before heading out to Milo.

“How about we go to the park baby?” Smiling I held my hands out to him, slowly he walked over his bottom lip stuck out little sniffles coming from him. “Papa’s gone…” I leant down picking him up, hand rubbing his back trying to soothe him. “I know, it’s okay…” carrying him upstairs to his room we picked a cute little set for him, seeing as it was quite warm out in Monaco, I encouraged him into the bathroom where he climbed on his little stool to brush his teeth.

He has always been very good with learning new things, he likes to be very much like his Dad, he see’s Max brushing his teeth, he wanted to do it, Max gets dressed by himself, Milo can do it. That’s why it’s been very difficult these few months with no Max present… it took a toll on Milo, what does he do now the only person he wanted to be like is rarely around?

“Go play, mama needs to get dressed mijn lieverd” (my darling) he nodded his head running off into his room as I got dressed, brushed my hair and teeth, and put on some skin care.

“Milo you ready?” Coming back out our room he come walking out smiling, his got Max’s cute smile, honestly makes my heart swell every time he smiles, maybe it doesn’t hurt me so much Max not being around because I do have my mini Max always. “Mama, we go park now?” Nodding my head I held his hand as we both took the stairs one step at a time.

“Did you want to bring anything?” I grabbed a large bag for us, heading into the kitchen packing a few snacks and drinks for us, going to the medical cupboard and getting Sun protection, “Milo let mama put this on you” I bent down in front of him applying it to any skin showing before putting it in the bag.

“This.” He held out his small replica toy of Max car before putting it in the bag.

I put his and my shoes on before holding my hand out again. “Ready?”

Nodding his head he took my hand grabbing his little hat that was on the coat hanger as we left.

It was only a small trip to the park, Milo absolutely tired himself out, us now both sitting in a nearby spot of grass in the shade, I was meant back against a tree Milo between my legs leaning back on me, eating some snacks.

“Papa home now?” He mumbled before putting another snack in his mouth. I ran my hands through his hair sighing. “Not yet baby…”

“At bedtime?” He turned his head slightly looking up at me.

“Maybe, if his not busy.” Nodding his head we then sat in silence, I took a picture of Milo sending it to Max, when Max was busy I always made sure to give updates on what we are doing, wether he answers or not.

On the walk home Milo ended up being carried as he fell asleep, clearly exhausted. Once indoors I sat him down in the lounge putting some cushions next to him so he didn’t roll off.

I quickly unpacked the bag and cleaned the house thinking about everything me and Max had to talk about, clearly believing that he will be home later, his promise taken seriously once again.

The day apart from that was quiet, Max never responded to my message, Milo was now awake and playing with his cars in the lounge and I was getting dinner ready.

When it got to dinner I messaged Max 20 minutes before dishing up, to see if he was going to be home, but no response. Me and Milo ate dinner with Max dinner now sitting there untouched, after dinner I cleared our plates putting Max dinner in the oven keeping it warm… hopefully he won’t be long-

I bathed Milo and was able to encourage him to stay in his own room tonight, which he settled down quite quickly clearly still tired from the day at the park.

And then I waited,

10:00pm rolled around, no max.

11:00pm still no max.

12:04am I decided to give up, I took his dinner out the oven throwing it away and headed to bed, the final broken promise.

I didn’t sleep, I laid in bed wondering what or who was keeping him away from home, this is the first 2 week break he has be able to have and yet we have seen nothing of him, I felt starved. I felt unwanted, pushed aside… Milo doesn’t understand fully, he only questions why Max is not here… and I have no more excuses apart from his busy…

12:47am the front door unlocked and I heard Max stumbling in swearing to himself, about 10 minutes or so later he came upstairs getting changed out his clothes and climbing into bed…

I just wanted to turn over and lay on his chest, pin him down and tell him he cannot leave. But I didn’t I faced the wall letting the tears silently fall.

“You awake?” The quiet whisper barley heard between us.

“Y/N…” he reached his hand out to which I quickly brushed off. “I’m sorry-”

“Don’t lie…” I whispered back, biting down on my lip, trying to collect myself.

“Are you crying?” I felt him shuffle behind me now sitting up using his arm to lean on. He pulled my arm gently trying to get me to turn over.

“Just go to sleep.” I tried pulling my arm away, but Max was quick to pull me back, now staring up at him, he leant over switching the side lamp on looking down at me.

“You are crying-” as if completely shocked he went to wipe the tears, I turned away swatting his hand away.

“You broke your promise.”

“I couldn’t just leave they needed me there-”

“Bullshit.” Sniffling I climbed out of the bed grabbing a pillow.

“It’s the truth.” I stood there staring at him, praying he would show me everything we have missed these passed few months, I was deprived of his touch his affection, I was deprived of Max.

“Why you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like you hate me.” With furrowed brows he moved to the edge of the bed.

“I’m starting to…” mumbling I looked down at the floor like I was ashamed to admit it.

“Your starting to hate me?” I nod my head slowly sniffling again.

“It took a lot of love for me to hate you the way I do…”

“You hate me?” He repeated again.

“Did you expect any different? Your not here-”

“And? that doesn’t mean you hate me-”

“Max your like a different person now. I don’t like this person you are- I fell in love with the guy that gave me that sweet little boy in the next room… the one who kept his promises, the guy that came home whenever he could to be with his family… this-” I looked him up and down stepping back.

“This isn’t him. This is not my Max. Milo’s dad… he asks for you every single day Max- and your not here… I’m surprised his first word wasn’t “Papa is busy.” From the amount of times I repeated it…”

Staring at each other Max in some form of shock and maybe disbelief, “your never here.” I finished my rant hugging the pillow tighter.

“I’m done now Max, I’ve given it my all… I’ve got no more love to give you.”

“Your giving up on us?”

“You did months ago.”

And I left the room, taking the night in the lounge.

Did it hurt the breakup? No… I was already prepared for it, Max said I could stay in the apartment until I found myself a place suitable for me and Milo, things have been better the past two weeks, I’ve had messages from Max, him asking how Milo is, if I had any photos of him that day, he called most nights to speak to him, and when Milo handed the phone back Max would try and questions the subject of us which I would always shut down… if it took me and Max separated for him and Milo to have a better bond then I’ll do it.

Max asked for us to attend a race in Barcelona in a few weeks, I wasn’t too sure seeing as the travelling for Milo wasn’t nice, and truthfully it would be awkward between me and Max… after sitting down and thinking about it, and how excited Milo got I agreed we will come, for the benefit of our child.

Milo didn’t stop talking for weeks, everyone he saw he told them he was going to watch his papa race, every night Max FaceTimed him and Milo would show him his car collection, every single night without fail.

Going back to that night… I don’t hate Max… it was in the moment it came out- but truthfully I love him with my whole heart. And seeing him improve as a parent only made me love him even more… but I was still being to stubborn to speak to him… and I wasn’t going to not yet anyways.

It finally got to race week, me and Milo was flying out on the Friday and should be at the track just before free practice. Milo insisted on wearing his red bull overalls. In a separate bag I had some spare clothing Incase he got to hot, which he will. But he was just as stubborn as me, and refused to change.

Milo was enjoying all the attention, people complimenting his outfit, and even asking to take photos. Which I allowed as Milo was excited to take pictures. We finally got to the red bull garage, everyone was all over Milo, but he only had one thing on his mind Max, and so did I.

“Where’s papa?” He looked around confused, seeing Max car there but no Max.

“His just coming- did you want to sit in his car?”

Nodding his head excitedly I smiled at the engineer thanking them as they lifted him into the car. I leaned down taking a few photos of him, his smile was just contagious everyone around him smiling also, it was a mini Max in big Max car. He was just adorable.

“You think maybe I should get him a car for his birthday?” Turning my head at the voice Max stood next to me arms crossed and a smile on his face as he watches Milo.

“I think he would love it.” Smiling I turned back. “He hasn’t stopped talking about you for 2 weeks straight.”

“Really?” It was max turn to look at me now in shock.

“Mhm, something about ‘Papa wants to play cars?’ ” laughing a little, Max chuckled also, he leaned over the top of the car rubbing Milo’s head.

“Papa!” He quickly jumped up in the seat reaching for Max, and soon settled on max hip as he carried him around.

“Look at your outfit- You look like pa” Max smiled tugging at Milo’s overalls.

“Mama got more.”

“That’s because Mama is smart, shall we go look at the other cars.” Max looked over at me and I nodded my head for them to go. Only then max grabbed my hand pulling me along with them.

All three of us walking down the pit lane, Max and Milo talking about the cars, me trailing next to them bathing in the moment. Max hand still on mine as we walked, it felt normal. Like we hadn’t spilt all them weeks ago…

“Milooo!” In unison we all turned our heads to the voice, seeing Lando come walking out his garage.

“Hello buddy, I hate your outfit…” Lando pretended to be sick which caused Milo to laugh throwing his head back.

“It’s papas.” Smiling happily at Lando, then moving to cuddle Max tighter. “I know it makes me feel sick! You need one of my ones.” Lando poked his cheek smiling back.

“No papa faster.” This now caused max to burst into laughter nudging Lando.

“Wow, I just got told by a 2 year old.” Lando half smiled, before turning to me leaning in giving me a hug. “Y/N sorry- long time no see” I smiled hugging him back. “How you been Lan?”

“Yeah not bad, working with whatever we got you know-”

“Papa- we go red” milo turned pointing down to the Ferrari garage, then looking back at Max.

“You wanna see Ferrari?” Bouncing Milo he said bye to Lando walking off before turning around.

“You coming? Or shall we meet you down there?”

“I’ll be down in a second-” smiling I waved Max off and turned back to Lando,

“Sorry carry on-”

“What is going on with you both?”

Confused I tilt my head looking at him, “what do you mean?”

“Well are you together or not? Cause a few weeks ago he was the most moodiest person in the world. And when I said to him about it he told me use were not together and now his all smiley stopping at garages, walking love loverbirds with you- I’m so confused!”

Laughing a little I looked down to Max, Charles, Milo and Carlos. “I’m just as confused as you.”

Slowly we both started walking down to them discussing what happened, Lando was like mine and Max’s best friend, everything was told to him, and he wouldn’t tell a soul… on purpose anyways.

Me and Max told Lando and Daniel first when we was expecting Milo before family! He is basically Milo’s uncle. Which is why I trust him to tell him our relationship woes.

“Hey Y/N!” Charles smiled and pulled me into a hug once we reached them Carlos following suit. “Hi, how are you both?”

Both nodding slowly, their faces said otherwise. “You?” Turning to Carlos I smiled, “I’m okay thank you, weather here is lovely!”

“I was just saying to Max, why is Milo in a racing suit in this weather?” Charles laughed a little tugging at Milos suit.

“He insisted he needed to wear it because Max wears it.” Shaking my head I laughed a little looking over at Max. Max however was occupied with watching Milo, in complete awe.

“You really said that mijn ventje?” (My boy) Milo hummed nodding his head.

“Oh Max-” checking the time in my phone I grabbed ahold oh his arm. “Practice is about to start.” Pushing him slightly back towards the red bull garage I gave everyone a quick smile and telling them to have fun.

Lando only responded with a little smirk, in response I stuck my middle finger at him behind Max back.

“It’s a good thing your here I would’ve missed that-” Max laughed a little before pausing and shifting Milo to the other side.

“Milo let papa put you down, you can hold his hand okay?” I reached over taking Milo from max putting him on the ground, and as soon as I did he grabbed mine and Max hand swinging our arms as we walked.

“Lando said you have been miserable, wouldn’t come out your drivers room or something?” Tilting my head slightly I sneaked a look at him.

“I haven’t been miserable… just didn’t feel like talking with people.” Max tutted face red slightly.

“And here I was thinking at least I wasn’t the only one.” Teasing him slightly I smiled a little at him.

“You wasn’t… it was hell.” A sigh left his lips as we got into the garage, I then grabbed Milo sitting him on a chair at the side, and sitting next to him while they got prepared. Max getting his gloves and helmet on and doing his race suit up, once ready he came over to Milo crouching down showing him his custom helmet design for this week.

Milos hands were all over his helmet in absolute amazement.

“Give pa his good luck kiss” I pointed to the front of Max helmet and Milo leaned forward kissing the helmet. Smiling max ruffled his hair and stood up, nodding his head at me and touching my arm, I was looking down at Milo and back to Max, maybe I should tell max good luck?

By now max had already climbed into his car and was ready to go out. An engineer already guiding him slowly out.

“Can you watch him for two seconds-” I looked up at another engineer who nodded taking my spot.

Quickly I slid through the people grabbing onto the edge of Max car looking at him from under the halo.

“Good luck.” He looked at me, the corners of his eyes creasing from a smile. Before i stood up letting go of the car.

“I love you-” it was barely heard over the sound of the car, max was already gone. But it gave me reassurance that I had come close to telling him.

Max qualified for Q2 through the practice and come back into a very happy garage- Milo was asleep across two chairs now changed into his other clothes as he got too warm. All he kept saying was “Papa win?” To which I responded with just a simple “yes papa is always a winner”

As soon as max got out the car he was pulling all his stuff off, gloves first then helmet then tugging at the zip on his race suit opening it up, completely ignoring everyone, and when he moved he headed directly towards us.

“Well do-”

“You still love me?” He was heavy breathing, face red, hair slightly damp. And the only thing I could do was nod my head slowly.

And that was enough for Max. Pulling me in and kissing me, he mumbled I love use followed by a kiss after every word.

“I thought you hated me-”

“Never in a million years… if anything I love you even more than when we was 19.”

Max smile grew as he kissed me again.

And once again I thought to myself, damn you Max Verstappen.

A/N: erm yes it was rushed- I woke up and was like I didn’t finish it- and I was posting today so I do apologise with my whole heart 🖤 but with whatever is there I hope you enjoyed it- I kinda like the whole Milo&Max might make them a mini series as Milo grows idk- we will see!

Masterlist

#f1 imagine #max verstappen imagine #formula one imagine #max verstappen x y/n #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen x you

[illuminatedvisage]

waiting for this story to end before i begin another.

Pairing: Jing Yuan x (GN) Trailblazer!Reader Summary: The General attempts to write you a letter. Warnings: Angst, Pining Notes: Title and quote taken from the poem, "Waiting for This Story to End Before I Begin Another" by Jan Heller Levi

it’s been a long time since jing yuan has needed to grind his own ink, but he has not forgotten the ritual of it. dropping water onto the inkstone, unwrapping the cake, dragging water from well to plain and grinding, slowly, in measured circles until the soot dissolves into the proper color. these days, his hands are more accustomed to handling paper over steel, to signing off laws over swinging his blade, but there is little art in the way he must handle his work—fastidiously, meticulously, planning for every eventuality. water defies such control, and ink makes such defiances permanent, which is perhaps why he’s chosen to write a letter to you in this way.

how else to express a heart honestly than to relinquish control of it?

i wonder—

i wish—

i want—

but how to begin? he tries a dozen different times, crossing off each false start, trying to put together his thoughts into some sort of coherency. it is easier said than done, and jing yuan, for all the merits he has earned and the battles he has won, does not consider himself brave enough to speak these things out loud. if he should stumble over his words, unrefined, unbecoming of his age— if those clumsy words should somehow fly to you like birds and reach your ears—

jing yuan laughs at himself. perhaps he hasn’t yet let go of the illusion of control.

he crumples the paper and begins again, setting out a new page, grinding more of that glossy ink. he finds it difficult to explain himself to you, even more so to do it without expectation, without trying to predict your response to the confession that pours from the tip of his brush—

i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you

he wonders when he fell in love with you, wishes he could pinpoint the precise moment when you began, unintentionally, to take up space in his heart. could he have stopped it? would he have, given the chance? or would he, having seen the pattern of your conquest, have simply let you advance piece by piece until he had no choice but to surrender—and look forward to that surrender if it meant you kept rewarding him with your careless smiles and unadorned camaraderie, if you kept treating him with a casual intimacy that makes a curl of pleasure and affection settle in his stomach.

the door clicks open, letting in a cool breeze and you, standing cocksure in the entryway of his office. your smile is warm as your hip checks the door closed. “looking awfully lonely in here, general,” you say, giving the room a slow once-over before resting your eyes on him. “have you come in here to take a nap?”

jing yuan sets his brush down, returns your smile with one of his own. “it’s not often that the seat of divine foresight is empty like this,” he tells you. “i thought it might give me a moment to finish a letter i had to write.”

for a moment, you look worried, as though you’ve interrupted some important business of his. but the glimmer in your eyes returns when he beckons you over, eyeing the paper that he covers up with the flat of his hand.

“top-secret luofu business?” you ask, tilting your head this way and that to try and catch a glimpse of what he’s hiding.

“something like that.”

“should i really be here, then?” you ask, before your smile slips into a grin, fingers already twitching for the piece of paper. “or are my information-sharing privileges still active? is it stellaron related? is it stellaron hunter related?”

“actually,” jing yuan admits, without really knowing why, “it’s a love letter.”

you pause, blinking rapidly, nose scrunching in confusion before a startled laugh bubbles out of you. “fine, fine,” you say, holding your hands up in surrender, “keep your secrets. i didn’t come here for that, anyway.”

“and what did you come for, illustrious trailblazer?”

“did you seriously forget?” you set your hands on the table, leaning in close until you are all he sees in his field of view. “the farewell party? to celebrate the successful containment of the stellaron? and the once-in-a-lifetime partnership between the express and the luofu?”

“it’s a long lifetime.” he hopes you don’t notice the way the words stick in his throat.

“not for all of us. so that’s why i’m here, to drag you back with me,” you say. your hand is already wrapped around his wrist, tugging him up, away from his desk. “by force if i have to.” he likes this about you, your easy manner, the way you treat him like an old friend; he likes it less that, like his old friends, you too will leave him on his own.

he doesn’t budge, gently releasing your grip on his wrist. but he doesn’t let you go either, not yet, fingers lingering in your own. it is the first time he’s held your hand, and it might be the last. “no force necessary. i’ll join you just as soon as i’m finished with my business here, so wait for me by the door.”

you huff but relent, pulling away too soon. “you work too hard,” you scold good-naturedly, “even though it always seems like you’re slacking off. are you sure i can’t convince you to jump ship for a while? the express has an extra cabin with your name on it.” your lips twitch as you fight off a laugh. “maybe you can even convince pompom to give you a whole car, oh great arbiter-general of the xianzhou luofu.”

a pang of some unnamed emotion goes through him. could it be as easy as that? to take your hand in his and say yes, say please, say i’ll follow wherever you go. he wants it to be but instead he retracts his hand, laying them over each other on his desk to stop himself from reaching for you again. “my place is here,” he says, and not beside you.

something in your gaze wavers, with sympathy or perhaps pity, he doesn't care to know which, and your voice goes soft as you step back, away from him. “right, then. i’ll wait for you outside, until you’re ready.”

his eyes follow you long after the door has closed. he looks at his letter, the ink smeared by his hand, and crumples it in his fist.

A/N: i can't stop writing for this sad, sad old man. and prob blade when more of his lore comes out.

#jing yuan x reader #hsr x reader #jing yuan imagines #honkai star rail imagines #hsr jing yuan #forgive me if i don't know how to tag these yet i'm simply baby and figuring it out #inspired by jing yuan flirting with the trailblazer over text. you can't tell me he isn't flirting!! you can't #.illuminations #.xianzhou luofu

[freddie-77-ao3]

Rest Me And My Bones

Summary:

“Hey,” Percy says, and it’s three AM, and Clarisse has finally got Ellis and Sherman to stop fucking fighting and go to bed, so why is he on the cabin doorstep, and really, how did he get around the landmines? Sure, all the counselors got to know cabin protections, but he hasn’t been at camp in… seven months? Eight? (Sure, Clarisse knows the exact date, deep down, a doomsday clock ticking away, your friend has been gone for this long and this long and this long–

But she doesn’t need to admit that.)

“The fuck do you want?” Her voice is gruffer than she means for it to. She loves him, deep down. (Very, very deep. You may need a gun pressed to her head to make the words come out. Doesn’t make it less true.)

“Donuts,” he responds without pause, holding up one of the camp SUV’s keys. “I figured we could go out with Will. He’s waiting in the car already.”

Or: post battle, Percy, Will, and Clarisse go out for donuts and talk for a while.

Chapter 1/2

“Hey,” Percy says, and it’s three AM, and Clarisse has finally got Ellis and Sherman to stop fucking fighting and go to bed, so why is he on the cabin doorstep, and really, how did he get around the landmines? Sure, all the counselors got to know cabin protections, but he hasn’t been at camp in… seven months? Eight? (Sure, Clarisse knows the exact date, deep down, a doomsday clock ticking away, your friend has been gone for this long and this long and this long–

But she doesn’t need to admit that.)

“The fuck do you want?” Her voice is gruffer than she means for it to. She loves him, deep down. (Very, very deep. You may need a gun pressed to her head to make the words come out. Doesn’t make it less true. She’s pretty sure he knows. He’d have to be, considering he’s knocking on her door at three AM, and she’d kill most other people for that.)

“Donuts,” he responds without pause, holding up one of the camp SUV’s keys. “I figured we could go out with Will. He’s waiting in the car already.”

“You got him away from the infirmary?” Clarisse asks, almost impressed. There are still twenty campers and thirty four Romans injured enough to be in the infirmary. Will hasn’t left since the battle, ‘cept for the quick War Council meetings. 

“What, like it’s hard?” Percy quotes, before admitting “It was a bit of a struggle.”

Clarisse hums. 

“Told him it would probably take you fifteen or so to write a note and get dressed.” Percy offers. “Figured we should talk. Will. How’s he been doing? Since I…” was taken, was kidnapped from my bed, abandoned him, abandoned you, “Left.”

“Not great. Not super surprising but… it was bad, for a bit. Sent him to mami for a weekend. He was pissed. He needed it though.”

“That all?”

“I figure we can talk about the rest in front of him,” Clarisse admits, “I think he’ll be doing alright once the Romans leave and the infirmary clears.”

“Do you?”

Clarisse softens for a moment. Gods, only a year ago, they’d stood on the same Olympus balcony. They’d both come down that time. But in the come down of this war, would the same be said? 

“I think we’re all going to be alright.”

“You sound too…”

“Optimistic?”

He snaps his fingers. “That’s the one. Write your note and let’s go.”

She rummages around under her bed. Pulls out a random off-brand orange pencil– Chiron never lets them have the nice ones, really, she would love some of those yellow ticonderoga pencils– and a piece of paper. 

She scrawls out a quick message– Sherman, went out, you’re in charge. Not dead, will be back by two. Don’t tell Chiron. Rips the note in two. On the second piece of paper, she writes, Ellis, told Sherman he’s in charge, you know the drill. Be good. Go to Malcolm with problems, Drew for fights, Connor for emotions. Don’t burn our cabin down. Will/Percy gone too.

She places Sherman’s on his pillow. Turns to her younger brother’s bunk. The top bunk still isn’t in use (because Ellis fights everyone who tries to take it of course– Ellis is a good son of Ares. One who didn’t have to beg-pray for years to get the honor of guarding the chariot.) The bottom bunk is covered in plushies, stuffed animals, and assorted teddy bears. Ellis is asleep on the floor, half wedged under the bed. She puts it over his face. 

He’ll be fine. Probably. Cause they’re all going to be fine, right? Their bones never ache from wounds healed late, or from the grief of losing those you’ve loved most in the world. That doesn’t happen. They’re going to be fine. 

(Clarisse La Rue distinctly ignores the voice in her head pointing out that prior to Percy’s knock on her cabin door, she was tracing old scars and war wounds and counting her dead. Lee, Beckendorf, Silena, Michael, Gavin, Mark… On and on the list goes. She could have stayed all night.)

But it isn’t time to think of this. She grabs her jacket, hanging off the broken part of her bedpost, and gives Percy a hand up from where he’s laying on her bed. He winces as he stands. 

“Broken leg?” He shakes his head. “Ankle?” she guesses. Another shake of the head. 

“Sprained my ankle,” he mutters. “It’ll be fine.”

“How’d you manage that?”

Percy starts to explain, with large gesticulations as they shut the door carefully behind them. They watch for harpies as they cross over to the Big House. Sure, counselor’s technically have the right to be out at night, but Clarisse still remembers the chunk taken out of Dylan’s arm when she was nine and he snuck out. 

Right before they reach the car, Percy leans over, throwing his arm around her shoulder and admits, “I wanna die. That’s why we’re doing this tonight.”

“I figured,” she returns, “S’alright. You coulda said it though.”

Percy isn’t smiling anymore. It seems more honest. He doesn’t seem sad– just tired. “I just wanted to pretend like everything was okay for a bit.”

“Kelp head…”

“It’ll be fine. We’re going to get donuts, like we used to, and it’s all gonna be okay,” he says. Just before opening the car door, he adds, “do you want to know how I actually sprained my ankle?”

“Depends, will it involve a sex injury?” Clarisse asks, completely serious. She’d been in the infirmary that one time when Miranda had admitted Sherman had broken his arm– through the skin– while they were making out on Sherman’s bunk and he had rolled off. That hadn’t been the picture she wanted to see of her brother. He was an idiot. (Sure, she loved him, but— why? How? It was just too much to think about.)

“No?” Percy responds, looking torn between wanting to know exactly what had happened and wanting to know nothing of the sort.

“Sure, then.” She says, vaguely curious as to why Percy wants her to know.

“I tripped in the showers thirty minutes ago.” Percy says, which… doesn’t completely check out– for multiple reasons.

Clarisse raises an eyebrow. “You don’t shower at night.” Plus, there’s the whole, water makes you stronger, and you’re actually not very clumsy, you haven’t been since we were twelve and–

Percy complains, “I’ll shower whenever I damn want.” But he doesn’t elaborate after that.

“What’s the real story?” She asks. “You wouldn’t tell me this for nothing.”

“That is the real story.” Percy says, avoiding her eyes.

“Come on,” she presses, “What’s going on? You brought it up, that means you want me to know.”

Percy mutters something indistinct, rubbing his arm. He probably doesn’t even notice he’s doing it— but Clarisse— well, Clarisse can guess. Last time he’d done it in front of her had been, what, ten months ago? Two months after the worst week of their fucking lives that they would never, ever recover from that haunts them through day and night and honestly Clarisse would have rather died than ever watched them die like that because she sees Silena’s hamburger face in the corners of her cabin and Beckendorf’s charred body at campfire, and Michael’s broken body and bones in the bay and really why did they have to deal with it, it wasn’t fair, they were kids, why did they have to go through it, five days of hell (but really, Percy’s been in actual hell now and) the war? And that’d been– that’d been bad. That had been sobbing–screaming–fighting-Percy trying to pitch himself off the big house roof with no ropes or cushions or–blood on the floor, in her hands, soaking Percy’s hoodie–

Were they back to that?

At once, Clarisse jolts. “You were washing blood off, weren’t you? You’ve been cutting again.”

Percy doesn’t say anything, just winces and plays with his sleeves. 

At that moment, Will leans over and opens the car door. “Are y’all coming? I oughta be in the infirmary if we ain’t going nowhere.”

“We’re coming, you little shithead.” Clarisse retorts. 

“Hey! I ain’t a shithead, you’re just late.” Will complains. He really is just a kid underneath it all, isn’t he? He’s fourteen. Fucking fourteen. Clarisse feels both very young and very old, all of the sudden. She– she just turned seventeen a couple of days ago. Silena died at fifteen. Beckendorf was sixteen. Mortal children can’t even sign up for the military until they turn eighteen, and yet she’s been through two wars– that’s not– that’s not fucking fair, is it? And Will– he’s younger than her, two wars in and–

What’s going on? Why do we have to– to deal with this?

“I didn’t set a time, Will, how could we possibly be late?” Percy asks. “Just budge over in the back seat, will you?”

Will moves obediently, all the way over, pulling his med bag with him. Gods, he’s so fucked up. Why does he think he needs a med bag? There’s three of them, and sure, one of them’s Percy, and Clarisse, yeah, she’s known to pick fights but– he’s really fucked up. Chiron had fucked him up with that infirmary nonsense. They’re getting fucking donuts, not going on a quest or mission or to fucking war (yet, anyway).

Will asks, “who’s driving?” 

“The car,” Percy responds instantly, and Clarisse glances down warily. She pokes the car. It purrs. Cars… definitely aren’t meant to purr. Sure, she doesn’t know a lot about driving, but Sally’d helped her get her license, and– the Blofis car definitely didn’t purr. That was really her main point of reference for mortal stuff, and she doesn’t remember cars purring in movies either.

“You didn’t get these keys off Jake, did you?” she asks, already knowing the answer.

“Now, now, Clarisse, that would be telling.”

“I’m not going in the middle.” She warns.

“Fine, climb over Will or go to the other side of the car, hurry up, I don’t fancy getting eaten by harpies.”

“You don’t fancy it?” Will asks, “What yank are you spending time around?”

“Hazel isn’t a yank, she’s just… from the forties. Like her brother.”

“Nico?” Will asks, sounding somewhat excited. He sounds like a normal fourteen year old again, when their friends are talking about their crush. 

Clarisse groans. “Percy, move over. If I have to listen to Will talk about di Angelo, I’m sitting down.”

“You’re still crushing, then?” Percy asks, wiggling his eyebrows. 

“Shove over.” They’ve been standing outside the car for ten minutes. The harpies are definitely going to come eat them now. Honestly, would Clarisse even regret that?

Percy moves from the doorway. Will scoots back into the middle seat. Clarisse climbs over him. Will offers a muffled complaint when Clarisse trips trying to climb over him and falls in his face.  

They can hear the harpies in the distance. Percy scrambles in the car after Clarisse, and snaps the door shut. 

“Alright,” he says, “now I just need to remember the code…” He scrambles in his pockets for the note Jake had given him. Finally, he pulls out a very crumpled post it note covered in… what Clarisse hoped–but doubted– was ketchup. “M–2–7–5–J–8–Y–4–M.”

At once the car turns on. “Destination?” It asks, in a robotic voice. 

“The closest 24 hour Dunkin Donuts.” Percy asks. The car starts. As they pull past the barrier, Percy turns to Will and wiggles his eyebrows. “So…”

#pjo hoo toa #pjo #riordanverse #pjo series #pjo fandom #pjo fanfiction #percy jackson #clarisse la rue #will solace

[2012wannabe]

One Bad Night

cw/tw: I played something that I knew would probably trigger me and then was all surprised pikachu face when it did soooo we have this! Don’t be like me lmao. Reader gets drugged at a party and you can fill in the blanks. Tbh I haven’t drank in so fucking long so if that part is inaccurate we can just ignore.

mid write update: I was like ‘oh I wasn’t triggered that bad’ and decided to finish the game which got 10 times worse and now I want to curl in a ball d*e so um anyway I hate this but if ppl like it I’ll do the second part like I was planning to.

abby x reader, reader is r*ped at a party, date r*pe drug, hurt/comfort, Slight weed usage mention, dr*gging, trauma

When you told Abby you were going to that party, she couldn’t help the sinking feeling in her chest. She dreaded it and wanted so badly to tell you to stay home. Thinking about it the whole day leading up to the party she wrestled to find a good reason for you not to go.

“It’s not that I don’t want you to go, but I just have a bad feeling. Please stay home with me, please.” Abby pleaded.

“I’ll be fine. I’ll have Ellie and Dina there with me.” You said. That didn’t do much to comfort Abby but your mind was made up.

“Is your phone fully charged along with your portable? Do you have your pepper spray and your taser?” She asked fervently.

“Yes to all of those things. I’ll be back in our bed safe and sound before you know it.” You said kissing her.

“Ellie and Dina are almost here, they’re picking me up. Are you gonna be okay?”

“Forget about me, I’m worried about you,” Abby muttered. You kissed her again and reassured her before walking out the door. Still, she felt unsettled and sat awake awaiting your return. She tried to calm her nerves, but nothing would do. You could do everything right and and still fall victim to the wrong person. The clock ticked on, 10, 11, 12, 1, 2 before Abby’s phone buzzed startling her. She anxiously responded, assuming the worst.

You had texted from the party, stumbling and your hands shaking. You had to strain to remember how you found yourself in a bed in one of the bedrooms that were on the second floor.

Her heart sunk into her chest, shattering like glass. She could kick herself. Abby wasted no time jumping in the car and speeding off to the party you left to. All the while you could barely follow the conversation as a bubble of panic started to form in your chest.

Her whole body shook as she voiced her texts into her phone microphone. She should have never let you go to that party, she chastised herself. Abby tried to push it down, knowing that you did indeed do everything quote unquote right. You frequented these parties and were familiar with all the people. You had your drink cover and an assortment of weapons. You were always with your friends. She could almost feel tears bubbling in her eyes from her worry about you, hoping that nothig actually happened and she was just thinking about the worst case scenario. She typed out another question, waiting for your answer.

She tried calling you to no avail. Your phone rang and rang but you lost your battle to sleep. She tried Ellie and Dina with unfortunately similar results, Texting them frantically asking where you were.Abby pulled into a spot on the side of the road and very anxiously ran up to the house, letting herself in.

Checking each and every room, Abby’s panic escalated. To her relief in the room at the very end of the hallway, you laid asleep in the big queen sized bed. She rushed in, slipping your phone in her pocket and sitting down next you.

“Hey baby, how are you doing? You scared me a bit.” She said, tucking your hair behind your ear. You awoke slowly and gave her a big smile.

“Abs!” You said,

“You’re here.”

“Did you doubt I would be?”

“Never. Not for a moment.” Your speech was still a bit slurred and there was still a pain in your thighs.

“C’mon, let’s go.” Abby said as picked you up and put you on your feet as if you weighed nothing.

“My strong girl,” you muttered. You gave Abby your things and she helped you back down the hall and out the door, both of you momentarily forgetting the implication of what actually happened to you. You were okay now, at least physically. She lifted you into the passenger seat of her car but when you sat down you couldn’t help but grimace.

“What’s up?” Abby asked.

“Just hurts.” Her heart sank again for what seemed like the millionth time that night.

“Can you show me where it hurts?” You put your hands on your upper thighs and into the space between your legs. Fuck. Shit. Fucking shit.

“You know what, let’s just get home and we can deal with that later ok.” Abby’s heart raced as she got into the drivers seat. She gave you some water she brought and your favorite kind of granola bar. As for you, your mind was just blank. You just stared out the window, not really thinking anything. Just silence echoing in your ears as you ate. In the years to come you would forget most of the details of the night, that morning feeling so far way. Abby tightened her grip on your hand and leaned over to kiss your forehead.

“I love you so fucking much. I can’t tell you how terrified I was that something had happened to you, that I had lost you somehow.” Abby whispered. Tears welled up in your eyes and you scrunched your face, turning away. You gripped Abby’s hand back and couldn’t help but just cry. You were so overwhelmed you didn’t know to feel just speechless, blank. She put her arm around you, pulling you in for a hug as you just all of a sudden felt your world crashing down. You cried and let out a particularly loud sob into her shoulder as she held onto you. Your phone rang, your ringtone cutting into the tense air.

You pulled away, wiped your tears and took a breath,

“Hey els.” Your voice still shook. Sounds of the party still blasted in the background,

“I just got your text and wanted to check up on you. Did Abby pick you up yet?”

“Yeah.” A pause.

“You sound off, what’s wrong?”

“I’m fine.” You lied, not wanting to explain everything the events of the night.

“No you’re not. What’s up?” Ellie asked more sternly.

“I’m good.” You said firmly.

“I just don’t want to talk about it right now. All you need to know is that I’m good.” Hesitating slightly, she agreed.

“Is Dina with you?” You asked.

“Yeah, yeah. She’s right here.” She said, Dina’s slurring voice echoing in the background.

“Okay, okay. I’ll call you tomorrow, all right?”

“Okay, get home safe!” The call ended and silence shot through the air. You looked at Abby again and neither of you said anything. For near the rest of the night, you both operated in silence. Abby drive you home, got you out of the car, you both went upstairs and started to get ready for bed. It wasn’t until you had to sit down on the toilet that it felt that all of a sudden your brain turned on again and pain flared through your inner thighs and crotch area. You let out a cry and just started to cry again with your pants still down around your ankles.

“Babe?” Abby said, immediately tending you you. Tears started flowing again and you let your body fall forward, hugging your knees. Abby extended her hand out gripping yours. You used her hand to pull yourself up so that you were standing half nude in front of her with your bruising on full display.

“I don’t…I don’t remember this. I obviously know it happened, but I just sat down to smoke a joint outside on the upstairs balcony and then I was groggy in the bed.” You said. The only thing you could focus on was the salty taste of your own tears that had wet your cheeks and Abby’s every tight grip on your hand. She let a few tears fly too, turning around to briefly wipe her face in attempt to stay strong for you.

“Okay. I appreciate you telling me baby. Is there anything else you want to tell me?” You nodded no in response and held your arms out toward her. She took you in her arms graciously, hugging you tight.

“Is there anything I can do for you? I can get you ice for the bruises and some water.”

“Jus’ want to go back to sleep.”

“Okay, ok.” Abby muttered, bringing you to bed. She put a pair of her own basketball shorts on you with ice packs tucked in the front in addition to your favorite hoodie of hers that you always stole. Your water bottle was sat on the night stand, filled with water and ice, ready for you. When everything was done Abby crawled next you in bed, wrapping her strong arms around you. You calmed for just a moment before muttering to yourself,

“He must have did it wrong.”

“What?”

“He must have did it wrong.” You said louder and clearer. There was a pause.

“Whoever did that to me must have drugged me. I took a shot right before I went up to go smoke which must have been where it happened considering I don’t remember anything after actually smoking. But something went wrong apparently because I was at most half asleep.”

“But you don’t remember the act?”

“No.” Abby swallowed thinking about that. It was probably better that you blocked out the event. The bruising patterns on your body told a clear story and her heart was absolutely broken thinking about what had to say next. It felt like she had cotton in her mouth, trying to to spit it out.

“So, for at least a moment we can’t dance around this. You were raped right?” Abby asked, sucking in a breath. You sighed.

“Yes. I can tell that much. It’s kind of coming back to me.

“Okay.” Abby said carefully.

“How would you feel about getting a rape kit done? You don’t have to, but I think it would be a good idea so that you have all that information should you decide to say something in the future.”

“Only if you come with me.” You said in a low voice, cuddling your body into hers and your face into her neck. Abby’s heart hurt as she said,

“Of course. Of course. We’ll go first thing in the morning.”

“Okay, Abs.” You took another deep breath and let your fatigue take over, lulling you to sleep.

#jack writes #abby anderson #abby the last of us #abby tlou #abby anderson fanfic #abby anderson fic #abby anderson x you #abby anderson x reader #hurt/comfort #rapesurvivor #noncon drugging

[crepesuzette2023]

Do you have an opinion on what actually happened in Barcelona and John's motivations?

No strong, line-in-the-sand, until-here-and-no-further opinion, and not prepared to die on any hills, but here is a blurry snapshot of my current thoughts on the quote unquote matter. (And thank you for asking!)

I think the question of "what happened in Barcelona" has too long been mixed up with speculations along the lines of "was John gay" or "did they have sex." While I relate to the curiosity, I think these questions, due to the bigotry of the times, led to simplistic, un-gay alternative theories (alternative to 'it was a Lennon-Epstein sex vacation', that is), which further confused the matter.

I do not think going to Barcelona was a power move on John's part to vet Brian and establish himself as the leader of the group. By the time of the trip (April '63), Brian had been the Beatles' manager for a while. He'd changed their act, found them a recording contract, had a separate contract with John and Paul as songwriters. He was in. Similarly, at this point, Brian would have been familiar with the power structure within the band, including John's leader/founder status and the equality that was the basis of the group and Lennon—McCartney. They were not a front man and a backing band, and Paul and John were not competing for the status of leader/main decision maker. It was them, together. There was no motive at the time for John to get alone-time with Brian to defend or regain his leadership status.

In addition to that, I don't think it's likely the vacation was related to the order of the Lennon-McCartney writing credit. Did John go to Barcelona with Brian to gain leverage that would allow him to demand his name would always go first, going against his previous agreement with Paul and Brian (which stated the main songwriter's name would come first, and all royalties would be shared 50/50)? Hmm. To me, this doesn't fit with Lennon-McCartney presenting themselves as a team of equal partners during the Beatle years, and with John emphasizing the roots of the partnership as reaching back to their romantic teenage pact. Neither of them tried to hide that writing was something they shared. There was no overt struggle for dominance, or even a clear division of tasks (as in, you do the lyrics, I do the music; or: you do the ballads, I do the rockers). And they planned to keep writing after the Beatles were done. Given all this, I feel it's unlikely John would scheme and try to get Brian alone in order to get his name put first, with Paul then just accepting it, because Brian and John forced him to.

It's so important to remember that much of the Beatles story is told in retrospect, after a bitter break-up, and in response to sometimes deliberately dumb or salacious questions. Yes, Paul framed Barcelona as a power-play on John's part, but that was after he and John had been through their own history of struggles of a decade or more, all of it amplified by the press and biographers of all stripes. And yes, John claimed Paul overpowered his artistic vision and fucked with his songs, but that, too, was in a later, more bitter time. In April '63, though? Were Paul and John really fighting for dominance? For leadership? For being the star?

I'm not denying that power played a role in John going to Barcelona with Brian, but I think it was something subtle—something related to being different...to John being the one to spend time with Brian, John separating himself from the band; John being the one Brian wanted to take along. And John agreeing to go.

{side bar on how every Beatle splitting from the main Beatle blob to travel down his own path with someone or something else functioned like a battle cry or warning signal to the others cut for brevity reasons!!!}

And yes, I think sex played a role in that decision. John made the choice to spend time alone—not a weekend, but twelve days—with a gay man who openly fancied him, and had tried to take him on solo trips before. Now, after refusing earlier, John agreed to go along. Trying to put myself in John's place, I have to believe that he knew the issue of sex and attraction would surface and have to be dealt with in some way, and that it must have felt exciting, and a little scary, but also: that it was time to do it, instead of always wondering what if.

But, judging from the events at Paul's (and Ivan Vaughan's!) 21st birthday party, I think it's fair to say John felt conflicted about it as well.

What actually happened in Barcelona? I'd be surprised if they didn't have sex. Judging from Brian's apparent blushing and walking-on-air happiness after the trip, I hope it was good.

Where this all fits with John and Paul, God—I've no idea.

The truth is rarely pure, and never simple. — Oscar Wilde.

Here is a lovely picture of John and Brian.

photo: Harry Benson

#John Lennon #Brian Epstein #lennon mccartney #what happened in Barcelona? #asks #The Beatles

[starlightandfairies]

Daryl Dixon x plus!size reader: Daryl and the reader are friends (but the reader wishes they were more because she is in love with daryl) and the reader joins Daryl to find more people they run into a bad group and it ends terribly and the reader and Daryl end up in France when they get to the nuns she notices Isabelle getting a little to close to Daryl the reader is jealous of course but she is very good at hiding her emotions so when they find the pre school with the kids that are surviving there before the reader joined Daryl to help get some medication for the kids teacher the reader ask Daryl if there is anything going on between him and Isabelle Daryl said there is nothing going on and why did she ask the reader tells him to forget she said anything but Daryl won’t let it go so the reader tells Daryl about her feelings and that he doesn’t have to say it back because she thinks he doesn’t feel to same way she just rambles on about how she finds herself ugly and Daryl shuts her up by kissing her and telling her he feels the same way and to stop talking bad about her self when they are back on the road taking Laurent (where Ever he needs to be taken sorry forgot the place) Laurent is being stubborn and won't get on the carriage so the reader gets down to talk to him and tells him that the reason he needs to go with him is because he is special and he is the key to curing the zombies and she promises that she won't let anything happen to him and that she will protect him with her life Laurent looks up to the reader because she is very pretty and she is a total badass because she is a good fighter and she puts herself in danger first so the people she cares about won't get hurt and she is very fearless and she doesn't like seeing good people die.

Description: The reader is forced to confess her feelings for Daryl after having suspicions that he loved Isabelle.

Warnings: swearing, fluff, she/her pronouns, twd violence, mentions of injury, insecurities. Based on Daryl's tv show episode 2

*Requests are open, please send through as many requests as you want, check my character list and requesting rules.*

Thanks so much for giving this request!!! I had fun writing it!!!

Key: Y/N = Your Name, POV = Point of view

Word Count: 1623

Daryl and I had know each other for quite a fair few years. After the battle of the Commonwealth, Daryl and I decided to go looking for Rick and Michonne. However, we got fucked over by another fucked up group of people and ended up in the water. I lost track of the days, I have no clue how long we have both been in the water. I felt a slapping against my cheeks, groaning and rolled to my side as woke up to find Daryl hovering by my side. 

After Daryl helped me up, I glanced around, knowing that we were not in America anymore. It was a matter of finding out where we were and what to do. 

“Guess we aren’t in Kansas anymore.” Daryl shot me a look, I stuck my tongue out and gave a smile, sometimes it honestly felt like the best that I could to do. 

“Can’t believe that after all this time you are quoting movies.” 

“What can I say? It’s what you love about me.” God I wish it were true 

After realising we were are in France; Daryl and I began searching for supplies to keep ourselves going for the night. Daryl found an French to English book to help with translations. After a little while longer, these two assholes screwed us over, tried robbing us after we killed two other men that tried attacking all of us. 

A group of nuns brought us in, treated Daryl’s acid burn from the walkers, which I’m glad was treated. Then came Isabelle, I hate to say that it’s been 12 years since the world turned to shit and I still get jealous feelings. Isabelle was too close to Daryl, maybe she hadn’t had a nice man in her life for a while but her beauty and her pretty smile made me feel insecure of my own looks and inability to tell Daryl how I feel made me feel shittier than when I realised I’m going to die before the world is fixed. 

All respect to the nuns; I understand why they did what they did but at the same time, after seeing it go wrong a thousand other times. Keeping a walker alive as a message or just the emotional trauma of losing that loved one is obviously horrible to go through but as soon as we realised that the father was a walker we left as soon as we could only to return and take Laurent, honestly a sweet little boy to safety. 

Daryl and Isabelle were walking ahead, I stayed behind, kicking my feet in the dirt like an upset little kid and carried on as I drowned in my own feelings. 

“What’s going on with you?” Daryl questioned, I glanced up, placed on one of my award winning smiles and shook my head. 

“I’m all good. Honestly, I just want to get back to America.” Daryl nodded believing what I said, turning back to the front and it allowed me to wallow in my emotions again. I loved Daryl, he’s a good man, even if he doesn’t think he is a good man, he is a good man and I wish that he knew that more often. 

Isabelle is gorgeous, more so than compared to me. I mean, I’ve got rolls, even during this shitstorm I’ve got all these skin problems still and I clearly have no confidence in my appearance, even if it doesn’t matter now. I thought the end of the world would mean less problems when it came to appearance and self esteem. But noooo, it still means the same shit goes through my mind like it did when I was dating in college. 

I mean, I can handle the shitty groups that survive off of anarchy. I can handle them, because just a couple of hits to the head and boom not a problem anymore. But my insecurities, they kill me and I hate that I am not strong enough to deal with problems that shouldn’t matter anymore. Staring at what used to be a preschool made me want to cry, the place is being run by children and I wish that these children didn’t have to go through this horrible stuff and could be children in a decently safe world where they didn’t have to deal with no familiarity of what we grew up with. 

“Hey, that teacher needs some medicine, want to come with?” I nodded, glad to finally be getting that one on one time with Daryl again. Walking in the silence became uncomfortable and noticing that Daryl was hanging out with Isabelle a lot I want getting curious to know about where he stood with her. 

“So, Daryl… what’s going on with you and Isabelle?” Daryl shot me a look, as if I really just asked him about something that sounds so childish and like a teenager experience. 

“There’s nothing going on between her and I. I’m just finding out what I can from her that can help us get back home… why?” There it was, that one little question that I wish wasn’t a word. I shrugged slightly, cringing internally as I realised my capabilities to hide my true emotions decided not to work today. 

“No reason.” Fuck my voice is giving me away, all nervous and defensive. Daryl stopped in my tracks, he grabbed my arm, getting me to stop in my tracks. I couldn’t meet his eyes, I insecurely wrapped my arms around my body to cocoon into myself as I always did when I was feeling insecure. 

“Don’t give me that crap. What’s going on?” I tried one more time, hoping that Daryl would give it a reason and not think to ask about it again. That was just wishful thinking. 

“Please, just forget it!” I snapped, Daryl took a step back, shaking his head and grabbed ahold of both my arms gently. I took a shaky breathy, shaking my head and sniffled. 

“What is going on?” 

“I’m in love with you! Okay?” Daryl looked surprised by my outburst, I pushed myself out of his arms and began pacing around the tree covered area we were in.  

“Me! Fat little me, I’m in love with you! And I know you won’t say it back because I know you don’t love me back because I am nowhere near as attractive as the girls I know you’d be with if the world was still normal.” I shook my head, keeping my eyes focused on the ground as my tears fell from eyes and I didn’t want Daryl to see me like this. 

“I’m overweight, I’m ugly, I’ve got rolls and eczema. I’m an insecure little girl who hasn’t changed since high school. My acne scars make me look like I’m a fucking walker. I am ugly and I am not worth anyone’s love, not even in this world because I don’t have that kind of beauty. I am no pretty nor worth anyone’s love and I-“ Daryl grabbed my face in his hands, his lips being placed upon mine and I know it sounds incredibly cliche but it really felt like the world literally stop. Why was Daryl kissing me? I mean I was kissing him back and holy shit it was one of the greatest kisses I’ve ever experienced and I did not want it to stop. I honestly forgot the world we currently lived in is the way that it is but having Daryl actually kissing me until I needed to pull away for air made me feel like I was in a world of a book that I would’ve loved to read in the before. 

“I love you. I love you more than I can even begin to say. I ain’t good with words. But you gotta stop talking down about yourself. You are gorgeous, you are exactly as you should be and I love you. I find you incredibly gorgeous and you have a heart of gold. You are not what that stupid little insecure voice inside your head says that you are. You understand me?” I nodded, smiling as he grinned at me and rested a kiss on my forehead. 

After leaving the preschool, Laurent was angry with Isabelle and wouldn’t get in the carriage that we acquired. It was honestly a very useful invention that made life so much easier. I decided to get out of the carriage to talk to the kid and figure out a way to get him in the carriage. 

“Listen Laurent. I understand that you’re upset and not feeling the greatest in regards to that you feel Isabelle is lying to and I won’t lie to you. Not about something like this. The reason why you need to go with us is that you could be the cure to helping understand a cure for these walkers. But I promise to you I will not allow you to be hurt, I will protect and you so will the rest of us. I will protect you until my very last breath, you’re one of us and we won’t let you get hurt. I promise you and if you feel that I break your promise then you can do whatever you want if it means you feel safe.” 

“I look up to you. You’re… you’re this badass lady that knows how to fight and is a good person because you won’t let bad things happen. You are also very pretty.” I turned to see Daryl watching with a smile, he winked at me and nodded softly as I got Laurent into the carriage finally. 

Daryl took my hand as I squeezed in beside him, resting a final kiss on my cheek before offering his shoulder for me to sleep on. 

#Twd #daryl #dixon #negan #the walking dead #walkers #zombies #daryl dixon fluff #daryl dixon #daryl twd #daryl dixon imagine #daryl dixon x y/n #daryl dixon the walking dead #daryl dixon fic #the walking dead daryl #daryl dixon x oc #daryl dixon x plus size reader #daryl dixon x you #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon oneshot #fluff #angst #daryl the walking dead #rick grimes #Judith #maggie #glenn rhee #the whisperers #twd #carl grimes

[icespur]

DadGoro Navigator Quotes Help

originally I had a concept I was going to post about "Teen Akeshu Daughter from the future gets sent to the past during P5R", but I got preoccupied.

She tries to play matchmaker to get Akiren and Akechi on the right path. But she also can't risk revealing who she is so to Akechi and Akiren she's a random teen around Futaba and Sumire's age that sorta resembles themselves for some reason, and must be a specially unhinged Akechi fangirl that hardcore ships Akechi with the Phantom Thief Leader for some reason, because wow is this girl not subtle at all in her attempts to pair them up.

So when she joins the group in their Metaverse adventures and fights alongside them, and Akechi takes role of Navigator, he especially makes his irritation of her known and just how much he doesn't give a shit what happens to her in battle.

("Akagi" is her "undercover" surname)

“Akagi-san’s health is down. Heal her I guess~” 

“What a tragedy, Akagi-san has perished.” 

“Oh, Akagi-san is fully healed and ready to continue to grace us with her presence~”

“Akagi-san has been incapacitated. Can't say I'm surprised.” 

But once he finds out she's his future daughter—-

Granted,the fact that he’s destined to eventually have intercourse that leads to knocking up his rival is—-alot to take in—-. but this is his daughter. His future flesh and blood, he—oh he feels like such a piece of shit 🤦. Curse his trust issues and natural skepticism, he was a fucking dick, how is he going to fix this? 

The “Daughter Reveal” makes him take a 180 in his behavior towards her. Something just clicks and “Fuck this annoying suspicious little shit.” Turns into “I've only known Komari for a couple of months, but if anything were to happen to her, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.” With zero warning. 

and this shows especially in battle.

"Oh, what an absolute tragedy, Akagi-San has died, tip your masks in respect everyone. She will be sorely missed, if only we had a revival on hand~"

To:

!

"MY BABY!

JOKER, GET THE REVIVAL ITEM, HEAL HER, HURRY HURRY, GET IT OUT FASTER, OUR PRINCESS IS FADING, ARE YOU THIS USELESS WHEN YOUR OTHER TEAMMATES ARE IN NEED OF HEALING?!

when infected with ailment, Akechi and Joker immediately tag team her with the feather fans to bitch slap the ailment away.

Akechi or Joker always perform a followup attack when she's having her turn in battle.

After a successful battle and if her Persona levels up and gains a new ability, the group comments would mostly be Akechi's "proud dad" attitude shining through, and drawing attention and demanding the rest of the group pay attention and praise his badass little princess, or he himself rambling and boasting about her new power before catching himself and covering it with a more subdued complement.

Then, a friend mentioned dialogue for other battle actions like Baton Pass and Ailments that I didn't even think of!

So I'm going to have you fellow Akeshu fans participate because I'm having trouble coming up with more Proud Dad Akechi dialogue.

Write some dialogue reactions for Akechi if his and Akiren's daughter was a playable party member.

(you don't have to fill out all these sections. Just, if you come up with a line for one of the below actions, reply or reblog with it and once I get enough participants I'll make another post.

Akechi/Crow: passes Baton to Komari: 

Crow/Black Mask response to Komari Attack Quotes:

Komari Dodges Attack: 

Komari Downs an enemy: 

Double Enemy Down: 

Down all enemies: 

Defeats an enemy: 

Defeats two enemies:

Defeats last Enemy:

Attack miss or Skill miss:

HP at 25% at start of turn:

Affected by Tarunda/Attack Decrease:

Affected by Rakunda/Defense Decrease:

Affected by Sukunda/Speed Decrease: 

Suffering from Shock:

Suffering from Freeze:

Suffering from Brainwash:

Suffering from Despair:

Suffering from Forget:

Suffering from Confuse:

Suffering from Rage:

Downed:

Recovers from being downed:

Incapacitated:

#persona 5 royal #persona 5 #akiren #ren amamiya #akira kusuru #persona 5 joker #goro akechi #persona 5 crow #persona 5 third semester #akeshu parents #akeshu child #akeshu #shuake #ren x akechi #audience participation #dialogue ideas #family fluff #proud parent #proud papa #overprotective #dad mode activated #need ideas #need assistance