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upsidedownwithsteve · 2 years

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Eddie Munson x fem!reader [6.2K] prompt: can I hold your hand? Shy Eddie, some yearning and fluff.

Eddie Munson wasn’t quiet. No.

He wasn’t reserved, he wasn’t timid, he certainly didn’t let anything or anyone make him shrink. He was bold, brash, loud, dramatic and awfully, awfully charming about it all. He liked to garner attention, he liked to flirt, he liked to make himself known.

No, Eddie Munson wasn’t shy by any means.

Apart from around you.

It started off subtle, little things that took you a while to cotton onto. On the days that Steve was busy, working overtime and unable to pick up Dustin and Mike from their club meetings, you’d linger outside the classroom door, listening to the pretty cadence of Eddie Munson’s dungeon master voice.

You liked the lilt of it, the way he drawled out his script, his low tone dropping to a whisper before bursting out with a plot twist, the sounds of hands slamming on desks and groans and whoops from his enchanted audience.

Then you heard the applause, the sounds of papers shuffling and chairs scraping against linoleum and you knocked once to be polite, opening the door to see the group of boys, and Erica, turning their heads to stare.

Dustin waved, Mike smiled, Erica popped her gum at you and Eddie Munson stopped mid speech, big, brown eyes wide and his mouth in a pretty, pouty ‘o’.

Silence fell over the hellfire table.

You smiled, bright and warm, waving back to Dustin as you watched the kids gather their bags, sliding in their character sheets and murmuring their goodbyes to their friends. Eddie was still staring.

The boy didn’t speak until you were ushering Mike out of the door, telling them that Lucas had finished basketball practice ten minutes ago and he’d be waiting by your car. Eddie cleared his throat as the room emptied, smiling shyly at you when you met his gaze, letting your eyes linger too long on his silver rings, the tattoos that peeled out from under his rolled sleeves, the curls that bounced in front of his pretty eyes.

“Hi,” his voice was so much softer than the boom you’d heard from underneath the door, the one that had spoken about dragons and monsters and warlocks. “You’re not Steve.”

You grinned, looking up at him with more flirt than you’d intended and you watched him swallow hard, take a little step back and breathe out a stuttering breath that you probably weren’t supposed to hear.

“I’m not,” you agreed, “Steve’s busy, got caught up at work but, uh, he said you wouldn’t mind if I gate crashed instead.”

Eddie mentally cursed out his friend, unable to stop himself from looking downdowndown until his gaze found your bare thighs, the pretty light green sundress that skimmed the tops of them, your too clean sneakers toeing at the floor by his boots.

Eddie Munson was fucking blushing.

“I, uh— sure, yeah,” the boy winced, nose scrunched, eyes closed ‘cause oh my god, what was wrong with him?

But you laughed and it was a sweet noise, the prettiest sound Eddie had ever heard and suddenly he didn’t know what to say but he knew he’d go home that night and remember the smell of your perfume, something sweet like coconut and summer.

But then Mike was shouting down the empty hall, Erica pulling at his bag as he complained and each huff echoed off of the locker lined walls and you were stepping backwards.

You raised a hand in a small wave, smiling at the boy until you had to turn around to see where you were going and Eddie immediately missed the sight of your face. You were almost at the doors, all the way at the other end of the hallway and the boy was still standing, jaw slack, lips parted and eyes shining, watching you walk.

And then as if he’d been hit over the back of the head, he snapped into action, voice breaking like a teenage boy as he called out.

“Hey! Shit, uh—” Eddie winced when you turned, lips pressed together so it didn’t look like you were laughing at him. You waited, patient. “I, uh, fuck… what’s your name? I didn’t get your name.”

You grinned then, wide and easily, hands clasped behind your back as you stood, the setting summer sun lighting you up from the open doors behind you. Eddie thought you looked like an angel.

You called back at the same volume, amusement and intrigue colouring your voice, telling the boy your name. You watched him mouth it back, trying out the syllables on his tongue, as if he was making sure it suited the shape of his lips. He must’ve decided it did, ‘cause he grinned, wide and pretty enough that you could see his dimples from even where you stood.

“I’m Eddie,” he told you, arms folded a little shyly, one hand reaching to pull at his curls, hiding his grin behind them.

Behind you, Dustin scrunched his features, bewildered. What was going on?

You smiled, ducked your head and nodded. You made sure you caught his stare as you looked straight at him, starting to back yourself towards the exit, the cool evening air hitting the tops of your thighs.

“I know,” you told him, and god, Eddie looked shell shocked.

—————

The second time you bumped into Eddie, it was at the grocery store and he knocked down an entire display of Campbell’s chicken noodle soup.

You were pushing a cart with your headphones on, wire tangled around your wrist as you shoved strawberries and cherries into the trolley, leaning against it until your skirt rode up too high and you were in danger of flashing the entire store.

You think that’s when it happened.

‘Cause you were straightening up to the tinny sounds of Joan Jett when you heard a dull crash behind you, the noise sounding far away from the way guitars and drums filled your ears. But you pulled away one speaker to look around, brows furrowed and lips parting at the sight of Eddie Munson staring at you from the midst of chaos.

Soup tins rolled down the aisle, some split open and creating a mess, puddles of noodles pooling at peoples feet. Steve Harrington was beside him, scolding the boy who wasn’t paying attention, a basket hanging from his arm. Mrs Collins, the town librarian, was scowling as she sidestepped a can or two, tutting at Eddie who was still standing there, motionless.

You found his gaze, lifted a hand in greeting and smiled.

It was awfully lovely the way he turned pink for you, cheeks flushed, eyes wide and doe like, blinking slowly as you moved towards him. The mess in the tiles and the tired store attendant with the mop stopped you from getting too close, but you grinned all the same.

“Harrington,” you greeted first, familiar and warm.

Steve huffed out a laugh at the way Eddie was staring, already well versed in the way the boy reacted to you, hearing all about your first meeting from Dustin who told him animatedly about how Eddie freaked out when he first saw you.

Now, with chicken soup at his feet and a fumbling Eddie by his side, he was starting to think the younger boy hadn’t exaggerated all that much. So Steve grinned and greeted you in a similar fashion, nudging Eddie not so subtly to get him to say hi too.

It was like Eddie suddenly realised what had happened and he blinked at the mess around him, toeing at a rogue can, sending it rolling down the other end of the store. The store assistant sighed and walked off with his mop but Eddie couldn’t really find it in himself to apologise, not right then, not he his throat felt too tight and his face was hot and you looked so pretty.

“H-hi,” Eddie managed, hands shoved deep into his jeans pockets so he wouldn’t do anything else stupid, like take down the Gatorade stack.

“Causing trouble?” You grinned, stepping over a cream coloured puddle to gain some closeness, skirting around Eddie to avoid stepping into the mess. You left your cart sitting, played pretend and made out as if you really wanted that bag of trail mix that sat on the shelf behind the boy.

“Us?” Steve smirked, “never. Just… some of us are easily distracted, it would seem.”

Eddie let out a strangled noise, chin tucking down to hide his pink cheeks. He could feel the warmth from them, the same way he could feel your eyes on him.

He didn’t say anything, he couldn’t say anything. Eddie wanted to hit Steve, a good, solid thump to the stomach because he felt like he was dying. He’d never felt that way before, so unbelievably shy and self conscious, unsure where to look, his stomach tumbling, his heart racing. It was wonderfully terrifying, made even worse by the way you looked, too pretty in another sundress - red this time - headphones blaring music he liked, dainty gold rings adorning almost all of your fingers.

“We’re actually just grabbing some snacks,” Steve went on. “Movie night at Robin’s, d’you wanna join us?”

Eddie took it back, he didn’t wanna hit Steve, Eddie loved Steve. He held his breath as he finally looked at you, electricity buzzing over his skin when he realised you were already looking at him, a small smile on your face as you stood with one hip popped, the bracelets on your wrist singing as you swung your unwanted bag of trail mix.

You pouted, genuinely disappointed that you had to say, “I’d love to but unfortunately I already have plans, thanks though.”

With another boy? Eddie wanted to ask. Did you have a boyfriend? A date? A girlfriend? Both? His head was swimming.

Steve tsked, feigning dramatic disappointment to get you to smile and it worked and Eddie hated it. That’s something he would’ve normally done, a whole thing of clutching his heart as if you’d broken it with your soft rejection, anything to get you to smile at him like that.

“Another time, then,” Steve told you and he slapped Eddie’s shoulder, a hand on leather. “Eddie’s hosting next week, horror night at his place. You should swing by, make sure he doesn’t scare himself stupid.”

You let out a soft laugh and Eddie swore he felt himself melt. He matched the sound, albeit a little more nervous than you, nose scrunching because he didn’t know what to say.

Steve was starting to think he was playing wingman for a boy who'd forgotten how to function.

“D’you need someone to hold your hand, Eddie?” You teased gently and the irony wasn’t lost on you because the boy was so much taller and wilder looking than you were, all leather and silver chains to your floaty, short dresses and his T-shirt today had a sun bleached print of Chucky on it.

Eddie stumbled and stammered and after a swift pinch to his ribs from Steve he nodded, heart stuttering and stalling when you grinned wide and bright. Oh, holy shit.

You turned then, stepping back over the wet tiles and grabbing your cart, dumping in the bag of nuts and dried fruit with a small laugh only you could hear before turning to wave at the two boys.

“I’ll see you both next week then,” you confirmed. You made sure to smile right at Eddie, not missing the way his gaze skimmed over all of you, the highs of his cheeks flushed. “You know, just to make sure Eddie’s looked after.”

And then you winked.

You’d barely disappeared around the end of the aisle before Eddie groaned out loud and clutched at Steve’s t-shirt, trying his hardest not to drop to his goddamn knees in the middle of the grocery store.

“What the fuck was that?” Steve choked out, holding back the laugh he wanted to release since Eddie first went into the tower of cans. “Where did your social skills go, hot shot?”

Eddie just shrugged, his head resting on his friend's shoulder. “I think I’m in love,” he replied mournfully.

—————

Low and behold, you actually did come to the next movie night.

Steve didn’t tell Eddie until the darker haired boy was setting up the movie, glancing at the time on the VCR and looking back at him questioningly.

“Where’s Nancy and Jonathan? They’re never fuckin’ late.”

Robin was already sprawled out on the sofa, legs pushed underneath the pillow from Eddie’s bed that she had a habit of stealing. He missed the way she smirked, the way her eyes flickered to Steve’s and how they shared a look.

But Steve didn’t miss a beat, sounding cool, calm and completely normal when he replied, “oh, they’re picking up your friend.”

Now, Eddie wasn’t Hawkins' most popular guy. In fact, he could count on two hands the friends he had that were over the age of eighteen and most of them were already here.

From the floor below Robin, busying themselves with the pizza boxes, Gareth and Jeff were laughing, eyes on food as they ignored Eddie’s glare. He looked panicked.

And when he caught Steve’s eye and he watched how his friend smirked and shrugged, Eddie knew exactly who he was referring to.

He whispered your name, each letter of it getting stuck in his throat and god, was he sweating? He felt too warm. “She’s coming? She’s coming here? Now?”

No one had a chance to respond before Eddie was on his feet, spinning in a circle, once, twice, before he made a noise that nobody could really discern. And then he was off, video tape only half way into the machine and the other movie boxes littering the living room floor, but Eddie didn’t seem to care as he disappeared into his room.

There was a thump, a thud, a curse and what sounded awfully like a quick prayer.

“Eds?” Robin called out from the couch. She looked concerned. “You okay?”

The girl only received a yelp in response and when Eddie reappeared he was in different clothes, his shorts swapped for cotton sweatpants, grey and almost new looking, free of ink stains. And his new shirt didn’t have any holes in the collar and the band logo on the front was less faded than his other choices.

If he was breathing funny, nobody decided to comment on it.

Eddie was combing his fingers through his curls, grunting at each tug whilst he kicked stray guitar picks and old notebooks under the sofa, pulling at Robin’s leg until she fell off with a whine, fluffing up the cushions she’d squished.

Steve was staring, Gareth was confused and suddenly, there were tires on gravel and the groan of Jonathan’s unreliable car engine.

“Oh my god,” Eddie whispered.

And then you were in his trailer, walking in behind Nancy with a four pack of Eddie’s favourite beer in one hand and a bag of gummy bears in the other. You were in another dress, Eddie immediately noticed, a longer one this time, the black button down material reaching your ankles and when you moved, there was a split up the side that showed a ridiculous amount of leg.

“Oh my fucking god,” Eddie mouthed again, staring at Steve with wide eyes before watching how you moved so easily into his small kitchen, smiling at Nancy when the girl showed you where to place the stuff you’d brought.

You were in front of him as the room buzzed with conversation and semi serious arguments about pizza toppings and snack choices, Jonathan taking over VCR duties as he knelt in front of the television. Everyone was decidedly not looking at you and Eddie.

You smiled, that same lovely smile you always seemed to save for him and Eddie huffed out a nervous breath.

“Hey,” you greeted softly, holding out the pack of beers, giving them a little wiggle. “Nancy said you liked this kind.”

“Oh, you didn’t have to,” Eddie exclaimed, but he took the bottles from your hands, cheeks pink when your fingers brushed and suddenly the trailer had never been smaller and he swore all he could smell was your perfume. “But, uh, thank you. Can I get you a drink?”

And then just like that, the lights were off and everyone was squished onto the sofas and armchairs, pizza boxes on the floor and everyone had glass of something fizzy or alcohol. The room smelled like popcorn, the TV buzzed with static and everyone eventually settled when the opening credits for Poltergeist started to play.

Eddie really wasn’t sure how it happened, how you managed to end up next to him, both of you in the armchair that usually only sat one person, but the boy was certain it had something to do with Steve jostling and a Robin insisting there was absolutely no room elsewhere.

Eddie felt like he couldn’t breathe, he could feel you against him, all soft curves and softer skin, thigh pressed to his and you slipped your sneakers off and tucked your legs into your chest. Eddie’s curls tickled your neck and you smell his cologne, peppery and woodsy, smoke and something sweet and god, he was looking at you with eyes that were big and bright, even in the low light of the TV.

He was chewing on his bottom lip, gaze barely focusing and when you shifted slightly and your dress fell open a little, exposing the length of your calf and your knee, Eddie let out a choked sound and tried not to stare. But then the clown was putting his arms around little Robbie’s neck and pulling him under the bed and it seemed like the perfect excuse to move a little closer and hold out your hand, palm up.

“Can I hold your hand?” You whispered to the boy, so close that your nose brushed his shoulder. You smiled when you heard his breath hitch, wiggling your fingers once, twice as Eddie looked down at the way your rings glinted, gold to his silver. “I forgot how creepy this movie is.”

It took the boy a second and he could’ve sworn he had a full audience of friends staring at him in the dark, but he smiled soft when he brought his hand to yours, marvelling at the size difference when you pushed your fingers between his. He sat for the rest of the night like that, your joined hands resting against your knees and Eddie didn’t have any concept of time or reality.

All he knew was you, the touch of you, the smell of you, the solid, warm weight of you leaning into his side in the dark and god, his stomach flipped and his heart raced when you played with his fingers, toyed with each of his rings, spinning the metal around each digit.

It felt like he was free falling, head spinning, chest aching. And then the movie was over and someone flicked the lights on and you stopped touching him - it was awful, the way you let go of his hand, but you were looking over at him with the sweetest kind of smile and suddenly Eddie didn’t want to ever be away from you, heart palpitations be damned.

—————

Eddie hadn’t been working in the record store all that long. But he enjoyed the calm, the low lights, the way he got to choose the music. He especially liked the way you dropped in from time to time, leaning over the counter to invade his space, perfume and the smell of sunscreen taking over everything.

He never got much done during those shifts, the usual customers going mostly ignored as you hopped onto the cash desk, dress hiked, legs swinging, smiling just for him. Eddie had gotten a little more used to your presence, the way you liked to lean into him, the way you liked to brush a hand over his arm when he listened to you talk.

You liked the way he still went pink for you, pretty lips parting when you traced a finger over the tattoos you were sometimes lucky to see peeking out from under his shirt sleeves. And when the day turned to evening and you were still there, keeping him company through a slow, slow day, Eddie got brave and leaned in close to where you sat, forearms brushing against your thighs and you hummed thoughtfully at the close contact.

You reached for a pen, a black biro that you twirled between finger and thumb and you tapped at Eddie’s wrist, grinning when he looked at you raised brows.

“Can I help you?” He murmured.

“Maybe,” you replied sweetly. “Gimme.”

You wiggled your fingers at his arm, pulling at his hand until he relented (easily and quickly) letting you rest it in your lap. Eddie swallowed hard, a small noise coming from his throat that he quickly coughed away, trying his best to ignore how his arm was touching your bare thigh.

You seemed to favour dresses around him, any length, all colours but always pretty and this one was short and tight at your waist, flaring out with cute little daisies adorning the fabric.

Eddie couldn’t take his eyes off of it.

“What’re you up to, trouble?”

The nickname was still fairly new and it felt soft and sweet on Eddie’s tongue and the boy loved how it made you grin, preening a little as if it was the highest compliment he could give you. Maybe it was; a true testament to the havoc you played on his heart rate.

“Giving you a new tattoo, Teddy.”

That nickname was new too. It started out as a tease, a joke when he’d appeared at the diner one night late, the rest of the party half way through their burgers ‘cause Eddie had had a nap that turned into a small coma. His curls had still been messy and sleep mussed, his usual leather jacket replaced with a hoodie that was too large and awfully soft looking, a tan colour that made his eyes look like sticky honey.

And thus, Teddy slipped from your lips over strawberry milkshakes and as the rest of the group howled with laughter, the boy in question turned the prettiest shade of pink. But his boots knocked against your sneakers under the table and when he looked at you with a smile that was all bitten lips and dimpled cheeks, you knew he really didn’t mind it at all.

It still made him blush though, especially when you called him it all alone. ‘Cause you said it in a voice that was so much softer and sweeter, like you were saying it just for him.

Eddie stayed impossibly still, more still than he’d ever been, just for you. You’d pulled him even closer, heads bent together, his curls brushing at your cheek as you carefully drew out your design. Eddie hugged out a quiet laugh when he realised what you were doodling, the dark, thin lines tickling at the inside of his forearm.

But let you keep going, lips twisted into a fond smile and he wondered how he could keep the pen marks there forever, whilst simultaneously planning all the ways he could hide it from Steve and the other guys. They all laughed at Eddie when it came to you; the way you could make him flush, the way you could calm him down and make him softer and quieter. They all told Eddie he was whipped and well, the boy never argued.

“There,” you whispered and Eddie could hear the smile in your voice despite the way he couldn’t see your face from the way you were still curled into him. “All done.”

You moved back, only slightly, back straightening and bracelets jingling as you took Eddie’s hand in your own and moved his arm under one of the dim lights. The little black lined teddy bear shone a little wetly under the glow, floppy limbed and one ear a little smaller than the other.

You grinned, no, you beamed and Eddie’s heart stuttered and stopped at the sight. Your touch was so warm, hot against his skin and the boy was so sure that he’d never, ever get used to it.

He grinned, tucking his lips between his teeth to try and control it, all flushed and pretty in the way he lit up for you. He knocked his shoulder to yours, curls tickling your bare shoulders.

“Well shit, sweetheart,” Eddie whispered. “If that isn’t my new favourite tattoo.”

—————

It had been well over a month and Eddie Munson still hadn’t kissed you.

You didn’t want to sound dramatic, but it was really ruining your life. Maybe not ruining it, but it was definitely making things difficult. ‘Cause more often than not, you spent time with Eddie alone and the boy still blushed when you smiled at him, tripped over his own feet when you let your dresses stretch up too high on your thighs and god, god, he let his gaze roam everywhere when he thought you weren’t looking.

The air was a little thicker, heavier, warmer, when Eddie Munson was around.

And now, you were in his bedroom, somewhere you’d started spending more and more time in. It had become easier to slip your shoes off and laze on his bed, always on top of the sheets and you always had to pay the space beside you before Eddie let himself fall down onto the mattress too.

Music was playing, soft and fuzzy with static ‘cause the summer outside was a little too hot and the heat was fucking with the generator. Eddie was sprawled out beside you, his white t-shirt so threadbare and stretched out you could see the ink on his chest underneath. The day was warm enough for Eddie to pull his hair back, messy curls pulled into a haphazard bun, loose strands falling into his eyes as he pulled his rolling tray towards him.

He was too busy licking a neat stripe along the paper to notice the way you were pushing yourself to your knees, head tilted to the side as you carefully studied the boy. He was painfully pretty, soft eyes, softer lips and all strong lines along his jaw, his nose, the slant of his high cheekbones.

If you wanted to do this, you were going to have to do it soon. ‘Cause you wanted to be sober for this, Eddie too, and the boy was ready to slip the joint between his lips to light it and pass it to you.

So you cleared your throat and tried not to fall off the bed when Eddie’s head shot up and he gasped at how close you were. The joint fell to the bed, forgotten and Eddie blinked, lips parted as he tried to not freak the fuck out.

You had a new dress on, white with tiny cherries printed all over it, thin straps holding it up and Eddie had groaned at the sight of it when you first appeared at the van door.

You were so, so close. You could count the freckles on Eddie’s cheeks, the tiny ones that dotted across the bridge of his nose and the more you looked, the more the boy blushed. You watched his skin turn rosy, brown eyes blinking at you, messy curls slipping out of the purple hair tie he most definitely stole from your wrist last week.

“Wha—?”

“Can I kiss you?”

Silence. Shock and silence and awe and a painfully long pause. Eddie wondered if his heart was still beating.

You sighed, pushed yourself a little closer still, knees pressed the mattress and when Eddie didn’t pull away, you let your hands rest on his knees and your gaze met his.

“Do you not want to kiss me?” You asked and you were surprised at how brave you sounded, not a hint of shyness left in your voice and maybe that’s because you’d been so fucking sure that Eddie liked you.

Like, liked you, liked you.

Steve had said so. So had Dustin. Even Robin winked and smirked at you when Eddie entered the room.

“It’s okay if you don’t,” you assured him softly, lip tucked between your teeth. You bit down on the skin there and huffed out a breath when Eddie’s gaze zeroed in on the way your tongue peeked out afterwards to soothe the sting. “I just— I just thought you wanted to.”

Eddie didn’t say anything, he just gasped at you for a second or two - although it felt like hours - pink lips pouted and his jaw slack. He looked too pretty; genuinely, heartbreakingly pretty, with his tied up curls and flushed cheeks and the stretched out collar of his shirt that showed of skin and ink and freckles—

“I do, fuck, no, yeah— I do.”

The rejection that was curling into your stomach retreated and your head snapped back up. You stared at him, replaying his stuttering, stumbling words and you watched as the boy sucked in a deep, ragged breath. Then his wide hand was cupping your cheek, guitar string callouses rough against your jaw, fingers slipping your hair and he was pulling you forward as he moved in andandand—

The bed protested under your knees and Eddie’s, both of you colliding in the softest way possible. You met in the middle, you a little taller than the boy, ‘cause at the eleventh hour you’d gotten too impatient and pushed yourself up so you could grab at his face too.

He was rough stubble underneath your palms, pliant for you, willing to go wherever you moved him to and he titled his head when you moved in and down, cheeks a pretty rose colour and his eyes fluttered shut when your lips touched his.

Eddie was hesitant at first, just for a second or two, both of you adjusting to the feel of a new mouth against your own. But his lips were warm and soft and they tasted like smoke and the lemonade he’d been drinking, tart and sweet and like the summer outside.

And you pushed yourself against him a little bit harder, one thumb stroking over the apple of a cheek and you let your bottom lip slip between his own. Eddie groaned then, a wicked sound, dirty and low and you felt it vibrate through his chest and yours. It made you squeeze your eyes shut a little tighter, made your breath catch in your throat and want to test the waters a little more.

You let your tongue peek out, a slow, soft slide against the seam of his lips and he parted then for you with another pretty sound, a whimper that had your toes curling and without much warning, his hand dropped from your jaw to catch at your waist and you were being tugged onto his lap.

You knew your dress was hitched up a little too high to be decent, but you didn’t really care. You gasped out at the contact, Eddie’s fingers gripping you on the edge of too tight, your legs splayed out over his thighs as he kissed you back with so much wanting that you thought you’d cry.

It turned a little messy, a little desperate, tongues sliding, lips parted over each other as you both made dirty, little sounds they had both of your hips rocking towards each other. Your hands grabbed at the back of the boy's head and you whined at the curls that were tied away from your fingers, so you scratched at the nape of his neck instead, almost - almost - too rough, making the boy shudder and groan underneath you.

And when you both pulled away for air, Eddie was all shades of pink, flushed cheeks, lips kiss bitten and rosy, pouty and a little swollen from where you’d been loving on him. His eyes were glassy, glazed over, jaw slack and the muscle there ticked once, twice when you pushed yourself further into his lap. His hands flew to your thighs, bare and almost too exposed, fingers curling around the doughy skin and you weren’t sure if he wanted you to stop or keep going.

You were both panting, chests heaving and everything glittered now that Eddie Munson had finally kissed you. Dust motes sparkled in the sunlight that came through the gap in the curtains, the shades drawn to trap out the heat but my god, you were burning.

And it was like you couldn’t help yourself, couldn’t keep your lips off of him now that you’d started and you leaned back in, hearing the way his breath caught in his throat. It made you feel bold, powerful, reckless, it made you feel absolutely fucking wrecked.

You mouthed over his jawline, the sharp line of it covered by a rough stubble that hadn’t really been there that morning and Eddie moaned for you when you hit a little spot underneath his ear. You grinned, smiled against his skin and took the lobe between your teeth and nipped gently, sucked at it until he was fully shivering underneath you, grabbing at your thighs until you knew you’d have crescent moon shaped marks the next day.

“Is that okay?” You asked him, voice impossibly soft, almost a little husky from the way he’d kissed you. “This alright, Teddy?”

His eyes almost rolled at the pet name, he couldn’t handle the sweetness of it, not with you in his lap with your pretty dress rucked up all indecently, your lips ghosting along the shell of his ear.

But he nodded, weak, holding on for dear life when you sighed all prettily and kept up your touch. You kissed a line along his neck, mouthing and sucking at the strong column of his throat as his Adam’s apple bobbed under your lips. You kissed a bruise into the crook, where his neck met his shoulder and you sucked and bit down until it was the prettiest shade of lavender you’d ever seen.

When you pulled back, Eddie’s eyes were closed, lips parted and breath coming out in harsh pants. It was almost unfair and you could feel him underneath you, impossibly hard, thick and twitching every time you moved against him.

So you slowed it all down, softened yourself, your kisses a little sweeter as you peppered them across his face. His cheeks, the tip of his nose, the soft skin of his eyelids, bottom lip sweeping over his lashes. You kissed the corner of his mouth, his chin, his forehead and onto his hairline, messy curls tickling your cheek.

And the whole time you whispered to him, soft, pretty words that had him sighing and gasping with each touch of your lips. It was all too good, too much, too nice and Eddie wasn’t sure what this meant yet but he never wanted it to fucking end.

“So pretty, Teddy,” your hand dragged down the length of his bicep, lithe muscles wrapped underneath ink and soft skin. “You’re just so pretty, y’know that?” Your thumb swept over the faded outline of the bear drawing you’d penned on him a week or two before and you smiled, tucked your face into his neck.

“So pretty when you blush for me,” you whispered and god, Eddie was trying his best not to lose it. “All pink ‘n cute.”

You held his chin in your grasp, finger and thumb pressed gently there to bring his mouth back to yours and he complied happily. He sighed into you, sweet kisses turning into another slow, lazy make out session, the dirty flick of his tongue against yours making you squeeze your thighs over his.

“Shy boy,” you murmured against his lips. “Or so I thought,” you hugged out a laugh when one brave hand moved from your thigh to your hip, brushing the curve of your ass underneath the fabric of your dress.

“You’re gonna kill me,” Eddie groaned, forehead falling to rest against yours. “Babe, baby—”

You whined at that, let him push his mouth back to yours so he could kiss you again and it went on like that all afternoon, until the blue sky turned into a deep violet, until the stars blinked and Eddie had you pressed into his pillows, kissing his own line down your throat. It was dizzying, the way he nudged the strap of your dress out of his way with his nose, hands never leaving your sides, your hips, the dough of your ass.

And when it all got too much and you both got too close to going too far, too quick, you slowed it back down with soft kisses and lazy touches. You were nose to nose on his messy bed, one of your legs hitched over his hip as he held you close and you were smiling, cheeks sore, eyes bright kinda smile.

“Shy boy,” you told him again, nose scrunching when Eddie grinned at you and kissed it. He was still the prettiest shade of pink, but god, you’d never get tired of it. “My boy.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson oneshot #eddie munson blurb #UDWS10K

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jester089 · 7 months

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What would happen if, having appeared at the circus, the reader looked around and said animatedly. “Wow...this place has changed so much. You did a good job, Kane!” - instead of the usual panics. It was as if they were already here. And how do they know his name is Kane?

everything is very simple. The reader has already been to the circus once (back when the queener was alive), but was able to escape. The reader decided to come back, because they felt sorry for the people in the circus, but when they came again, all the old characters had long since disappeared, and instead they saw the main cast. They had to explain everything again: what the world looks like from the outside, how much it has changed, and most importantly, that there is a way out and they are helping them.

They know how to find a way out, remember their past and true name, and have decided to came back to help others escape. It would be cool if Kinder remembered the reader, because he was the first

Back so soon?

So their is what you asked. But it made me think of something. What if reader was someone who created Caine/the circus. And they check in like every 6 months or so just to see how everything is going, and to make sure nothing is going horribly wrong. But they can't get the others out. So they just do their best to make the place comfortable. I'll still write your request but my idea will probably be written soon. Maybe. I honestly don't know. But you didn't specify on if you wanted the crew sperate or not so I'm just going to do a one shot.

TADC crew x Reader who visits the circus

You pop in on digital circus every now and again just to check in on everything and see how Caine is. Your a coder and stumbled upon it by chance. That is actually how you found a way out, and help everyone with their memories. Those x'ed out doors are people you've gotten out, or ones who abstracted before you could help them. You sometimes use it as a vacation too. Life is stressful and that place is full of a childlike fun and relaxing atmosphere when you aren't worried about escape. I mean you don't have to eat, drink, or sleep. And you get to go on silly adventures. 10/10 vacation spot if that's your thing. You pop into the colorful main room and look around. It's about the same as last time, that isn't a bad thing though. "Caine! I'm back!" No response. huh. Eh he's a busy guy you can't really blame him. You start walking towards the rooms hoping to meet everyone new. ~~~~~

You get there and skim over the doors different pictures. "Ok so looks like we gottt. A comedy masked ribbon person. A mismatch of colors and pieces poor them. A chess piece. Oh no, their was a queen version. Oh geez now I feel awful. Maybe I should stop by more... Ok uhh, a ragdoll. A periwinkle bunny. And a Jester. Alright not a bad line up." You ring each rooms door bell getting no response each time. "Wonder where everyone is. I hope they're ok." You start wandering around calling out for Caine every now and again. ~~~~~ After around 20 minutes of wandering you find Caine and the group of people that the rooms belong to at the carnival. You jog up to them waving. "Caine! I'm back!" He does an over the top spin and hold the sides of his head like. "Y/N!!! What a pleasure to see you again! Back so soon too! We were having a day at the carnival! Seeing as how it wasn't used for a long time I made some changes! Their is now more rides! And an arcade! How about I introduce you to everyone!" "Yeah I would love that! Also I can't wait to try out the new rides. I had been on the old ones more times then I can count." He directs you towards the crowd of people some are looking at you confused as to how you know Caine, and aren't freaking out. Some just look like they don't wanna be there. ~~~~~

Around 5 minutes later you know everyone by name (Sorry I didn't write that. But you already know who they are and that would have taken me longer then I'm willing to take) so you introduce yourself and how you know Caine. "It's lovely to meet you all! I'm Y/N L/N, but you can just call me Y/N. I'm a coder who can get in and out of the digital circus so I visit sometimes." The short Jester who you now know as Pomni snaps her head in your direction. "You have a way out?!" "Uhh yeah. That's actually the main reason I visit so often. To help people out and get them out. It doesn't really work without me here so I try and visit whenever I can." "Get. Me. OUT OF HERE!" "Ok, ok geez. The rest of you want out too?" You receive only positive reactions so you take that as a yes. You motion for all of them to follow but before you walk off you turn to Caine. "Be back soon! Just gotta get these people home." "But of course. I feel their should be a way for me to be able to get people out. You'd think I would me being the controller of everything their would be. But at least their is a way for everyone to get out. See you soon Y/N and thank you again for all your help!" You wave then lead the group back to the main room and to the stage. "You can do this just about anywhere but this is the place that I've found is the best. My best guess is because it's always where people pop in when they first arrive." You walk up to a seeming specific wall and do something (?) to it. You move off to the side and motion for them to walk into the wall. Pomni essentially sprints into it not even thinking that you could be joking. And she goes straight through. The others soon following. After everyone's out you stretch and start walking back towards the carnival. "Some digital cotton candy sound pretty good right now. And I wanna try out those new rides Caine talked about."

(If I'm being honest I didn't really like how this turned out. But I digress. Sorry it took so long. And sorry only really Pomni talked. Still I hope you enjoyed it! I'm going to give this a special tag cause I feel like I'm going to continue it someday.)

xoxo, Jester

#tadc x reader #the amazing digital circus x reader #caine x reader #pomni x reader #noob author #not beta'd #A way out

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kalims · 2 years

Text

‎˃ ᵕ ˂ . . "I hope you know that the things I do for you are all in the name of love."

simple acts of love,

guess what I found DEEP, DEEP in my drafts.

characters. dorm leaders

includes. gn reader.

cw. short scenarios, bruh this was literally so deep like i was still rosestadt when I made this.. not proofread or changed at all since I made it.

note. no use of any names, only titles to fit in more with the gender neutral theme, since I know some people may know yn or name as an entirely different character.

riddle rosehearts — making their favorite kind of tea / coffee.

a clink makes riddle tear his eyes away from the history book he was previously skimming over. the action of his jaw chewing immediately ceased at the sound, leaving the taste of his favorite tart lingering inside his mouth.

dessert. it was always his favorite part of a meal, even if he didn't have much freedom to actually consume them in his childhood.

riddle finds himself looking at the prefect of ramshackle wearing a calm expression on their face, they present a relaxed exterior—and in their hand, is a cup of steaming, hot, lemon tea.

"prefect, what's this?" he blinks, slowly, and innocently. riddle leans over to let the aroma of the tea enter his senses. and when he does, there's only two cubes floating around the liquid.

and then there's a realization. "wait.. this is.." #339 your after-meal tea must be lemon tea with 2 sugar cubes.

you smile. "for you. your after meal tea should be lemon tea, right?" there's a moment of silence that ensures, before riddle answers slowly.

"ah... yes, I'm suprised you remember." he clears his throat. gladly lifting the cup up with the use of his fingers, and of course. leaving his pinky sticking out, it's the only proper way to drink tea after all.

the laugh that you release makes his face a little warmer, he isn't sure if it's because of you or the hot gas the tea emits. "well.. I don't really remember all the rules, I just happened to remember you mentioning it. that's all."

riddle presses his lips together. gripping the handle a little tighter. you were actually listening to him? what a joy, you should have been sorted to heartslabyul! he must make an appeal to crowley after this. "hm.. this is most appreciated, thank you prefect."

but for now..

you walk around the table until you're near enough to be able to lean and see what he's reading. "what are you reading?"

his answer is immediate. "I'm going over topics for the upcoming exam—" riddle pauses, and looks over at you. "—would you like to join me?

ㅤ

leona kingscholar — covering them with a blanket whenever alseep.

"ah.. he fell asleep again." you mumbled, trailing off for a second to admire leona's features. he probably was a pretty popular guy back in his home if he wasn't scowling so much.

you wrack your mind for the item you've misplaced. didn't you leave the blanket folded on the bed? you wonder. carefully sliding off the sleeping lion's head off your lap and into the couch, watching him grumble and stir.

please don't wake up.. you internally pray. sighing in relief when you finally slip away without disturbing his slumber. (which you'd like to differ.)

after making sure your legs weren't as numb as before, courtesy of leona laying on it for hours. only letting you leave when you needed to pee, trying to tell you to hold it in so he can 'sleep better.'

you peer inside your bedroom and marvel at the horrible generosity crowley gave you, you aren't really in the position to complain since you'd be homeless if it weren't for him. but now you wonder if leona would let that even happen.

the door would probably fly off its hinges if you pulled any harder, a few cobwebs around the corners you couldn't reach and there's rust forming around the metal surfaces of the room. barely noticeable but if you come closer it's definitely there, the room looks relatively okay compared to the other rooms of ramshackle.

you quickly grab the blanket atop your bed, snuggling closer to the cloth gently tickling your face. it's soft and comfortable, perfect for a nap.

leona's sleeping figure comes to view after passing by a few rooms, ramshackle was bigger than you'd thought when you first gazed upon it from the outside. his position still stayed the same as it did the last time you saw him a few minutes ago, probably too tired to even move.

creeping closer to the unsuspecting man, you switch off the lights. humming softly at the way the darkness wrapped around you like a veil, casting a soft atmosphere across the room. and then finally, draping the blanket across his body, stretching it all the way just below his ankles. since you knew he didn't like both of his feet absorbed in the whole thing cause it might get too hot.

in fact he didn't bother with blankets much so you figured that you'd bring him one anyway from how cold it was in the winter. even when there's a fireplace just a few distances from you, the frost still somehow paves its way.

winter in this world was kind of a hassle since you had to shovel your way through patches of snow unless you wanted to get stuck inside the building. you found out the hard way after you got buried in a mountain of snow after opening the front door.

you sigh and shake your head, scratching your head from the memory. as you stand up you're suddenly bounding towards the couch at an alarming speed, so fast that everything actually blurred.

you took a few moments to register that you're laying down, cocooned in leona's arms. his breath tickles your neck as he nuzzles further in, providing you with the warmth to finally relax.

as some kind of bonus you aren't sure he's even aware of; his tail, usually swaying comfortably behind him is now wrapped around your leg as some kind of unconscious affection.

how do you get out of this? well it seems like he was aware and read your mind. "you don't."

ㅤ

azul ashengrotto — popping into each other's zoom calls.

monstro lounge is pretty chilly. you think, he was pretty picky about his circumstances. you slide a finger over a surface and finding not a single dirt in it. but its expected when he's a merman.

you look up. marveling at the various fishes swimming around the ocean, of course. taking a second to admire the many coral reefs, all different in shape and color.

the lounge was pretty quiet. given when it's so early, the only reason you're only actually in here in the first place. was because you'd fallen asleep, waking up in azul's bed. the man himself sleeping on his side of the bed, leaving a big space between the two of you as if he was nervous to be in the same space as you.

leaving out the sounds of water flowing. there's also the eery laughter of two twin eels, that signals nothing good is ever gonna come out of it. and of course:

azul's voice, loud but oozing with easy confidence. which you're not even sure if it actually is after the whole overblot thing.

you curiously stare at the hall where you know leads to his room. if you focus you could hear.. "headmaster, with all due respect...." and then you bleurgh, is he talking to crowley? well it wasn't your business anyways..

so you let the intrusive thoughts win as you creep closer to the door of his room, there's a small opening as if it was begging for you to peek through, and you do.

you see azul seated on his chair, wearing his dorm uniform when it isn't even a school day as he talks actively to his monitor, and on his screen is a layout of all the dorm leaders you've come to know.

riddle is nodding attentively, speaking when necessary. leona is laid down on his bed, looking just about ready to drift off. kalim is showing the camera a bright smile as jalim urges him to listen in the backround.

vil looks like he's looking at himself in the camera more despite looking at the screen. idia's camera, of course being off. and malleus not even being present.. he probably got excluded in the invitation as usual, but you aren't even sure if he owns a phone, much well know how to use it.

crowley is also there but whatever.

you quietly slide inside. hastily passing behind him, praying you didn't appear. the meeting does go on, until kalim speaks. "wahh!! was that the prefect?"

azul blinks and turns in confusion. counting in his head that all prefect were in the call. when he sees you, his mind just blanks for a second so he just dumbly stares.

you wave awkwardly. "hi.." kalim returns the favor tenfold. "hi prefect!!"

"what's the prefect doing there so early?" riddle's voice fades into the room and azul forgot how to lie for a few seconds.

"hm? oh ah... well.."

somehow the dorm meeting whose main topic was originally planned to be for school. ended up with you being the topic.

ㅤ

kalim al asim — running to them, picking them up, and spinning them in a circle.

in a hallway, kalim can be seen walking. there's a content smile on his face, a little duller than his usual bright one but a smile regardless. all in vicinity of the boy openly stare at his obvious upset mood.

there wasn't a jamil in sight which is strange since the classes of second years usually end at the same time, unless one of the professors had something to say.

ah... what do I do? I haven't received a letter from my family as usual.. kalim sighs solemnly, his shoulders further drooping. just the thought of his siblings makes him a little lonely.

if jamil was here he'd probably say. "kalim. you received a letter from your family three days ago." ah, he could almost hear his voice!

your head pops out from a pillar, grim following right after and as if some kind of butterfly effect, ace and deuce's heads pop up a second later. you all whisper vigorously.

"that's dorm leader kalim.. he looks upset!" deuce mumbles. ace just rolls his eyes and snorts. "yeah? way to point out the obvious genius."

they start bickering.

"why are we here? there's a lotta' food in the cafeteria and we're missing out.." grim says, then he looks at the pair. "oi! you two, you're gonna expose us!"

grim joins the bickering and you facepalm. it's a wonder kalim doesn't notice the chaos a few distances away from him..

you beam. "guys! I have an idea!" at your statement they both pause and look at you skeptically. "what?"

"sorry not sorry to say this but your ideas aren't exactly the best."

"who saved us from that one time in the mines?"

you join the bickering for a few.

that's how you ended up sprinting across the halls at a speed you didn't know you possessed. eyes locked in on the turban wearing man, kalim continues to trudge towards his next class unknowing of the chaos as usual.

"kalim!" the boy stops and turns around in confusion. nonetheless there's still a freindly look on his face, which soon turns into more confusion when he spots you making a beeline for him.

the next second he feels you collide into him, the air is knocked out of his lungs briefly and he feels himself hoisted up in the air and spun around while being hyper aware of your close, discret snuggling.

when his feet touch the ground there's an obvious lift to his mood. "that was fun!! let's do it again!!"

"wait I haven't worked out muc--"

you're both on the ground now.

ㅤ

vil schoenheit — doing your makeup together.

there was always a saying. beauty is pain and you wholeheartedly believed it when you witnessed the whole backstory to vil's overblot. but now..

now you start to regret believing it because why does your brows even need to be perfect!? you side eye the mirror. it looks perfectly fine!

in his fingers lay a tweezer, and in between the tweezer is the sacrifice from your brows. "stop jumping around so much, I wouldn't wanna mess this up." vil scolds. choosing to not comment on the fact that you scooted away from him.

"ouch.." you're trying to resist to tear up. immediately scooting away from vil once you feel the awful, stinging pain from your eyebrow. he casts you a half hearted glare.

you narrow your eyes at him. "is this really necessary?" you question seriously. vil raises a brow, somehow making him look more sassy. "there isn't beauty without pain, this is a necessity."

you both stare in silence, neither giving up before he eventually sighs and rolls his eyes. "hmph. fine, we were done with that anyways." vil softens up. giving you a taste of mercy before grabbing a tube of eyeliner and beckoning you to come closer.

you oblige cautiously and place your hands on your lap, sitting idly as the pleasing sensation of the brush is felt ok your eyelids. from your unoccupied eye, you give a moment to admire his concentration.

wow he's.. "beautiful, hmm?" a look of confidence is paired with the air vibrating around vil. you nod mutely, not sure if he's talking about himself.. or you, most probably the first one.

vil stands up and grabs your wrist in a firm, tender grip. he leads you in front of a mirror, wearing a triumphant smile as he admires his work. "now you've grown, potato."

"are you gonna harvest me now?" you joke and his face drops. "...what? no."

idia shroud — bailing them out of awkward social situations with a specially-designed system of code words and hand motions.

anyone has the one time, sight of a lifetime of they catch eye of the ignihyde dorm leader. more looking like wanting no more than to just melt into the wall itself as idia presses himself further to the corner.

his fiery hair shrinks the more the random student—too enthusiastic for his taste, talks animatedly in a way that even he struggles to keep up. usually idia thinks he's good at multitasking since he could read subtitles while taking note of a particular fight scene.

but this was way too hard..

"hello!" idia flinched at the uncharacteristically loud tone you spoke it. the student however, blinks and turns to you with a raised brow. their attitude does a complete 180° but you admit you'd grown used to it.

this is a school for villians after all. they probably didn't want to talk to a nobody like you.

since the student seemed lenient on giving you the lesser treatment you just opted to ignore their existence and look straight into the anxious eyes of idia.

you beam a forced smile. "idia!—" but then the student interrupts you again, with a slight chilling persona. "excuse me. would you mind?" then they turn to him again.

contrary to their previous attitude they switch their personality again..

idia stares right into your soul. a silent plead. help me.

you cringe, hand switching into various hand motions when the student turns their back to you. idia's eyes widen in astonishment and understanding, his flames seemed a bit brighter. if you ignore the slight tinge of pink.

he nods at the student who seems ecstatic by his non-verbal response nonetheless. "i-...um... I have to go attend... a, b-birthday party for the reindeer? " idia mumbles out through clattering teeth.

"huh?"

it seemed like a question rather than an excuse so you started wildly gesturing—the student still unknowing of you. be more confident, relax. "I-I'm going to a birthday party!"

he adds after a long silence. "...for the reindeer!"

now he seemed way too excited.. you facepalm, opting to just leave him alone and gesture for him to take a leap of fate and start running towards you.

the student blinks and suddenly they're the only one alone in the hallway.

"wait... that was the prefect of ramshackle?!" a scream of despair.

ㅤ

malleus draconia — tracing the veins on the insides of their wrists.

his hands are humongous. you muse. absent-mindedly toying with his fingers as you stifle a yawn. malleus hums, using the hand that you weren't occupied with to wipe away the tears that formed after your yawn.

affectionately of course.

but then again. you presume that since he's a dragon and all its expected, given his height was already quite abnormal from the start. up close, he's larger than expected.

it's funny. the literal guy feared by the whole school is letting you toy with his hands..contrary to the rumours he was a pretty nice guy! if you look past his intimidating persona atleast.

but you do get their fear of him. weird as it sounds.. malleus really is quite scary. even worse when he's somehow angry. with his tall exterior, emerald eyes that usually seems so dark, and the horns. it makes him look..

so beautifully dangerous.

you turn malleus' hand. immediately catching eye of the prominent veins, kind of flexing under the weight of your grip. you can feel the thrum of his pulse through your fingers.

"do you feel that?"

"..I believe so?" he looks more entertained than you.

you mumble. "why is it so.. long?" you gingerly rub the vein, you can almost feel malleus vibrate, seemingly pleased.

"because—"

"hUumaaAAANN! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH WAKA-SAMA?!"

note. i just saw it when I was cleansing my drafts.. actually say thank you to ellie since they are wholly the reason why it gets published in the first place. again, NOT CHANGED AT ALL since I wrote it months ago

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hp-hcs · 7 months

Text

the rules (Chapter One of The Doll) — slytherin boys x gn! ‘the boy’ (2016)! reader

Requests: open

tws: dolls, obviously; reader referred to as ‘it’ (presumed inanimate); mentions of past child character death(s); mentions of a house fire—implied arson; violence; & murder

based entirely off of the 2016 film ‘the boy’. very few things in this world are able to scare me more than that fucking doll

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“This house is freaking me out, man,” Theodore grumbles, setting down his trunk in one of the guest bedrooms. Mattheo snickers from his spot where he’s leaning against the doorway.

“What, you afraid it’s haunted or something? We went to school with ghosts for eight years, dude.”

“Oh, shut up,” Theodore rolls his eyes. “Not haunted, just… offputting. This feels like the kind of house that has like, secret stairways and trapdoors and shit.”

“The L/Ns didn’t draw their inspiration for their house from H. H. Holmes, dipshit,” Blaise scoffs as he elbows his way past Mattheo to get to his room.

The trio snicker at each other as they all drop their suitcases and trunks in their respective bedrooms and reconvene in the foyer of the massively ancient house.

“I’m just saying,” Theodore was explaining to Blaise as they made their way downstairs. “Nobody chooses to make their house look like a Victorian dollhouse if they aren’t fucking crazy.”

“Guys?” Enzo interrupts timidly. “We have a fucking problem.”

“Oh, I so called it.”

“Shut up, Theo. What’s the issue, Enz?” Mattheo drawls.

Enzo holds up the note that the L/Ns had left them that provided instructions on how they were to take care of and clean the house.

The boys had opted for this choice—staying in and cleaning up some wealthy family’s creepy house over the summer—instead of serving time in Azkaban for their stances in the war.

(It had seemed like the better choice at the time.)

“They’re even more insane than we thought, guys,” Enzo shakes his head. “They got a creepy as fuck doll that they think is their real kid, or something.”

“Yeah no, I’m out,” Theo mumbles, putting his hands up in an ‘I surrender’ pose and taking a step back.

“Fuck you, if we have to do this, you have to too,” Mattheo snaps. “Where’s this doll?”

Enzo points to one of the faded decorative chairs that flank the doorway to the parlor. Sure enough, a terrifying, two-foot tall, porcelain doll sits there, dressed up in an expecting-company outfit with tiny little leather oxfords to match.

“Yep, I agree with Theo. I say we get the fuck outta here,” Blaise mumbles, shaking his head with wide eyes.

“Its name is…” Enzo scans the letter. “Y/N. Oh, wonderful, the L/Ns wrote out its entire daily schedule for us. That was so thoughtful of them.”

Enzo falls silent as he skims the letter further, shaking his head the more he reads. “They’ve got some weird rules, guys,”

“Do I dare ask what they are?” Theo mumbles weakly.

“‘Number one: No guests.’ Well there goes my weekend plans,” he mutters sarcastically. “‘Number two: Never leave Y/N alone.’”

“We’re so getting murdered here,” Blaise grumbles, receiving a sharp glare from Mattheo.

“‘Number three: Save meals in freezer.’”

“Country house. That makes perfect sense,” Mattheo scoffs flippantly, ever the skeptic.

“‘Number four: Never cover Y/N’s face.’ Oh my Merlin, we’re going to die here. ‘Number five: Read a bedtime story.’”

“Honestly, you’re all so dramatic,” Mattheo rolls his eyes. “This is probably just some weird way for them to deal with some trauma they have. Do we know if the L/Ns have any kids? Actual ones?”

“Just one, but they died,” a new voice chimes in. Draco steps into the foyer, folding up his umbrella and shrugging off his soaked overcoat. “Sorry I’m late. Went into town to buy cigarettes, and the guy at the gas station told me all of the gossip surrounding this house. Anyway, why are we asking about the L/Ns’ chil- what the fuck is that?!”

“This is Y/N,” Theodore says plainly. “Come on and make your acquaintance, hm?”

“I’m good, thanks though.”

Enzo clears his throat loudly, getting the two to stop bickering. “‘Number six: Play music loud.’”

“So that we can’t hear them coming when they sneak up on us to kill us,” Blaise bemoans, pressing one hand against his forehead and mumbling under his breath something about how Azkaban wouldn’t have been that bad, would it?

“‘Number seven: Clean the traps.’ Wonderful. ‘Number eight: Only Regulus brings deliveries.’”

“I met him,” Draco interjects again. “At the gas station. He introduced himself. He’s the grocery boy for the L/Ns.”

“Good to know. ‘Number nine: Y/N is never to leave.’”

“We’re fucked,” Theo shrugs, nonplussed.

Enzo gulps. “‘Rule number ten: Kiss goodnight.’”

~~~ Chapter Two <3

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ineedtorantaboutjiangcheng · 1 year

Text

Fuck, I'm here again. Goddammit. I've been doing well. I've been keeping Jiang Cheng off my mind (and my computer screen). Things have been peaceful.

And then today happened.

Again, a fic. Again, not naming names, both because that's rude and also because this issue is hardly specific to one fic alone. I've seen it many times.

But I've been pacing for half an hour, too agitated to keep reading, so I'm just gonna get this off my chest, and then skim through the fic 'til it stops talking about it.

I need to talk about the golden core reveal.

Specifically, I need to talk about an attitude I've seen cropping up recently in a lot of fics. (By recently, I don't mean it's only recent fics that do it, just that I've only noticed it recently.)

So it'll be a fic, usually canon divergent, but prior to the golden core reveal. Wen Ning or Wen Qing will often be involved (though I can think of a few times it was Lan Wangji). And the character, who knows the truth about the golden core transfer, will urge Wei Wuxian to tell Jiang Cheng.

They'll say "you have to tell him". They'll say "he'll find out eventually". They'll say "he deserves to know".

And... the fic will support this.

Will frame Wei Wuxian as irrational, paranoid even, to keep it secret.

Will sometimes even punish him, narratively, for his "failure" to disclose such a thing.

And I am... completely baffled.

Where the fuck is this coming from?

I suppose, if I'm being generous, I can kind of see why an individual sympathising with Jiang Cheng might have a knee-jerk reaction to this. If you see them as being essentially family, the idea that a family member that you love deeply, keeping what amounts to both a huge sacrifice and a massive disability from you would be extremely painful. You might feel hurt, that they didn't tell you. Angry, at the implied lack of trust.

I get it, as an emotional response you might have in the moment. I don't find it particularly relatable, but I can follow the thought process.

But like... that's an emotional response. Surely, at some point, logic has to kick in, right?

Because the thing is. Okay, there's two aspects to the secret, right? One, is that a medical procedure was done to Jiang Cheng, sort of like an organ transplant, I suppose, but he wasn't told that the organ was donated by Wei Wuxian. And the other is that Wei Wuxian made this huge sacrifice for Jiang Cheng, and didn't tell him.

But thinking about this for even five minutes should tell you that... neither of those things are actually Wei Wuxian's responsibility to deal with?

The first one is the by far the more common argument I've seen. I've read fics where Wen Ning and Wen Qing are tortured with guilt over having performed the procedure without telling Jiang Cheng all the details. I've even seen people have them blame Wei Wuxian, for demanding they keep it secret, had them secretly resent him for it. He's portrayed as deeply selfish, for keeping the truth of Jiang Cheng's operation from him.

But the thing is... if you're going to apply modern medical ethics to the situation... Wei Wuxian was in the right? They all were?

Under modern medical ethics, you have no right to know the identity of your organ donor. That can feel a little weird (it's probably why people often have a knee-jerk reaction that demands the opposite); after all, it's my body, shouldn't I have a right to know where the organ that goes in it comes from? What if it has cooties?

But according to medical ethics, the donor's right to medical privacy is more protected that the recipient's right to that information. Right to medical privacy is pretty highly valued; it kind of ties into body autonomy, which is kind of the keystone of... most modern ethics. You have a right to control what happens to your body, and that includes controlling whether or not people know about any medical conditions/procedures. So you might have an emotional response, thinking Jiang Cheng is valid for being upset that his golden core came from Wei Wuxian without him knowing, but... ethically, Wei Wuxian has the right to withhold that information.

But! some scarecrow says, If a person has the right to control what procedures happen to their body, surely that means Jiang Cheng has a right to control what happens to his own body! Therefore, the procedure was still unethical, because he didn't know everything!

And I say, well... not really. The reality is, we don't actually know how much Jiang Cheng was told. He was told to walk up a mountain, lie to the person he encountered about his identity, and ask for a golden core. And he left that mountain with said golden core... but we don't know how much Wen Qing told him when he reached the top. We know he believed Wen Qing was the Baoshan Sanren. We know he received a fully developed core, not just the ability to form a new one. Was he told that the core was from someone else? Were there signs of the transfer? Did he know the chance of success/failure? Did he not find any of the situation dubious?

(Did he really spend two and a half years fighting a war alongside, and then running a sect for a year with, someone and not realise they didn't use orthodox cultivation even once?)

The truth is, a doctor is required to inform a patient of risks, and answer any questions they ask. Wen Qing may well have disclosed the risk (if there was any to Jiang Cheng, other than potentially the transfer failing) prior to the surgery, we just don't know. We don't have any evidence that Jiang Cheng asked any questions, and from what we see in the novel, it seems likely that he simply didn't want to know. He got a core, his life was somewhat back on track; we never see any evidence of curiosity or confusion in him as to the specifics of how that happened.

The only lie we are sure that he was told was the identity of the person who he met on the mountain, who "gave" him the core. I could be petty and point out that as he was also lying about his identity, it kind of cancels out, but that would be a bit ridiculous, and unnecessary besides. The truth is, ethically, Wen Qing could have knocked him out and performed the surgery from the comfort of her own office. Because one of, if not the main reason you can ethically violate someone's body autonomy... is to save a life. And Jiang Cheng, after losing first his family and sect, and then his golden core, displayed clear suicidal ideation. He indicated, repeatedly, that he wanted to die. He refused food. Wei Wuxian even doubled checked, before giving him hope of getting a new core, that he was serious! (Rereading that scene is horrible; Wei Wuxian's dread, and eventual resignation/resolve becomes very apparent once you know what's happening).

The characters around him, including a trained doctor, believed that if he didn't get a new core, he would give up and die. Under those circumstances, a doctor has authority to make medical decisions, without a patients consent, if they believe it is a medical emergency. Wen Qing was an unquestionably brilliant doctor; if she believed doing the surgery was the right/necessary decision, who the hell are we to dispute her?

So, to be clear, under modern medical ethics (which seems to be what is being applied in these claims), Wen Qing has the right to do whatever surgery she feels necessary to save the life of her patient, no consent needed, and Wei Wuxian has the right to keep his identity as the donor a secret, since that's his own private medical history. Modern medical ethics (a bit ridiculous, when talking about magic powers, but I've seen the argument) supports our protagonist.

Now, onto the other thing. This is a lot less... ethics discussion and a lot more feels-bad-so-wrong type thing. Wei Wuxian kept the loss of his golden core a secret.

Jiang Cheng being upset by this is understandable. Like I said, I can follow the emotion/logic. Someone keeping a big secret from you can be hurtful.

But just because it's hurtful to you, doesn't mean they're in the wrong to do it!

If someone I cared about kept a massive secret from me, and I found out, I'd be upset! But my first thought would be 'Why did they feel they couldn't tell me?' And the answer here is obvious; Wei Wuxian didn't think he could tell Jiang Cheng because he knew he'd be horrible about it! Wei Wuxian admits, after the reveal, that the process of losing his core was distressing, and that he wasn't as okay with it as he pretended to be. If something like that happens to you (not... that it can, but, you know, equivalent), and you're struggling to hold it together, the last thing you want is someone you care about yelling at you about it, insulting you, making you feel bad for what happened!

Wei Wuxian didn't tell Jiang Cheng because he knew Jiang Cheng would be awful to him because of it. Jiang Cheng's jealousy when they were young was something Wei Wuxian felt he had to manage*, and he knew Jiang Cheng would feel inadequate if he realised his accomplishments were made with Wei Wuxian's core. And he would then lash out at Wei Wuxian for it, at a time when Wei Wuxian was already feeling emotionally fragile. Hell, nearly twenty years later, Jiang Cheng getting up in his face was enough to cause a Qi deviation; I can't imagine it would have been better any sooner!

No one wants to think of the people they love keeping secrets from them. And sometimes, people who keep secrets are doing it for their own sake, because they're scared, or unsure, or guilty, or whatever. But sometimes, when a person keeps a secret, the reason is not internal. If someone acts horribly to you when you tell them things, you're going to stop telling them things. And the person responsible for that gap in communication is them; all you're doing is protecting yourself.

And before anyone thinks that I'm assigning reasoning to Wei Wuxian that he doesn't have; he essentially admits it. After the reveal, Wei Wuxian states that he knew Jiang Cheng would react badly (though he didn't expect it to be quite so bad). Wei Wuxian is shown to have been managing Jiang Cheng's moods since they were young**, it's probably not the first secret he's kept. But that's kind of just... how that works; if a king kills every person who brings him bad news, eventually, all his advisors will only ever bring him good news. And he has no one to blame when his kingdom falls but himself.

SO. tl;dr. Modern medical ethics supports Wen Qing performing the golden core transfer, and Wei Wuxian keeping his identity as the donor a secret. Jiang Cheng can be upset at Wei Wuxian for not telling him that he no longer has a core, but it's not unethical, or selfish, and the nature of their relationship, with Jiang Cheng lashing out with impunity and Wei Wuxian trying to manage his moods, meant that secrets like that were pretty much inevitable. Unhealthy relationships are unhealthy. Truly, newsworthy take.

And one final note, on Wei Wuxian keeping secrets from Jiang Cheng and being portrayed as selfish for doing so; I have yet to see a. single. fic. that says Wei Wuxian keeping his sacrifice secret is wrong, but then goes on hold Jiang Cheng equally accountable for keeping his sacrifice secret. Not. One. Jiang Cheng often tells Wei Wuxian afterwards, that he deliberately got the Wens attention, but he's never framed as selfish for keeping that secret. Not. Once.

* see post-Xuanwu argument, when Wei Wuxian drags himself out of his sick bed, having just woken up from a coma, to reassure Jiang Cheng that he's no threat to his birthright. Because Jiang Cheng was jealous that his father acknowledged Wei Wuxian's skill in surviving, under horrendous circumstances. -_-

** childhood flashback; after arriving in a new place, having a massive change in lifestyle and meeting many new people (and, it seems, trying to make a good impression), Wei Wuxian took the blame for his broken leg, despite it being because Jiang Cheng locked him out of his room and threatened to sic dogs on him. Entirely because he knew one of them would get blamed, and he wanted to keep Jiang Cheng happy. People who grow up with aggressive/abusive family/people around often end up learning to juggle mood changes.

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #canon jiang cheng #urgh #i didn't mean for this to be so long #or so lecture-y #look i just feel very strongly about body autonomy #and the ethics around privacy #so i get really really angry when people act like wwx was in the wrong here #you have a right to medical privacy!#its IMPORTANT #(but also sorry)

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panandinpain0 · 1 year

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Reader and Edward (twilight) watching a horror movie together!!

Reader likes them, but also gets easily scared also could it be a gn reader please?

Tough-Exterior-Ed

Of course! Thank you for requesting <3

(Yes I'm fully aware the title is not actually a word.)

Fluff/Comfort Edward Cullen x GN!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, hugging (Alice is in it, ofc there's hugging), mentions of axe murderers (in the horror movie)

In the Cullen family kitchen, currently hosting all of the Cullen's, Edward sighed and hung his head.

"They're here."

"You seem disappointed?" Rosalie said it as a question, her iconic scowl settling into place as she looked Edward over.

If only they could hear what was going on inside his head.

"Eddy. Eddy, Eddy, Eddy, Eddy, Eddy. Guess what? I'm here! I'm at your door. Do I need to knock? Edward- I know you can hear me."

With an amused smile Edward just shook his head at Rosalie, the family sharing looks of confusion as Edward made to leave the room.

"Don't embarrass me, please," Edward quietly begged of his family before continuing on his way.

"No promises," Emmett snickered, sharing a look with Jasper and Alice as he wrapped his arm around Rosalie's waist.

As Edward opened the door a very dramatic sigh echoed through the entryway.

"God, I thought you'd never come!"

Edward just rolled his eyes good naturedly and helped (Y/N) out of their coat, trying not to snicker when they muttered "that's what she said" under their breath.

"My family's in the kitchen, if you'd like to meet them," Edward offered, knowing it was their first opportunity to- but not wanting to force them.

"Are you fucking kidding me? Of course I want to meet your super awesome vampire family!" (Y/N) shot Edward an incredulous look and grabbed his hand, pulling him in the direction they assumed was the kitchen.

What Edward liked about (Y/N) was that he didn't have to read their mind to know what they were thinking- mostly because they lacked a social filter and said anything the second it entered their mind. But it made up for some interesting conversations.

"Aha!" (Y/N) cheered as they found the kitchen without Edward's guidance, looking around the kitchen at the vampires. "Hi!" they said, waving.

Alice let out a barely concealed squeal as she dove at (Y/N), wrapping them in a hug. (Y/N) barely got time to reciprocate when Edward pulled them away.

"That's my fault, I shouldn't have offered," Edward somewhat laughed as he led them to the lounge. Yes, this place was a lounge- how could it be a "living room" when (Y/N) was probably the first living person to actually enter it?

"So, what do you want to watc-" (Y/N) was cut off by their own gasp as they saw the shelves holding all the movies the Cullen's had collected.

"Whatever you want is fine by me," Edward said complacently, sitting down on the couch and preparing blankets for when (Y/N) sat next to him.

"Horror- for sure," (Y/N) commented as they dragged their finger across the DVD cases. They pulled a random one out and skimmed the back before popping it out of its case and putting it into the DVD player.

Sliding into the couch (and accompanying burrow of blankets) next to Edward, (Y/N) took the remote and pressed play. The lights in the room dimmed until they turned off completely, the only light shining on their faces from the TV.

Edward sat with his arm over (Y/N)'s shoulder, (Y/N) basically in his lap as their legs were thrown over his.

"No, no- don't go in there!" (Y/N) quietly begged the character on the TV, knowing he couldn't actually hear them.

"You do this every time, you know," Edward mumbled.

"Yeah, but it goes the same way every-" they were cut off as they flinched back into Edward, gripping his hand as the axe murderer on the TV jump scared them.

The night went on like that, only pausing for (Y/N) to select a different horror movie to slip in.

Edward couldn't help but marvel at the fact that (Y/N) found comfort in him, no matter how cold or tough-exterior-ed he might be.

At some point (Y/N) had fallen asleep against his chest, blankets wrapped around their shoulders as they snored. Edward was taking in their face, wanting to reach up and caress their cheek but not wanting to disturb them with his temperature.

That's when he heard the giggles, turning his head to find Alice, Jasper, and Emmett peeking through the doorway. Edward glared in warning and Alice just smiled and dragged the boys off.

End

Don't really know where I went with that- I felt that this one was oddly paced. Hoped you liked it though!

-Author Max <3

#twilight #twilight fanfiction #twilight x reader #twilight x gn!reader #x they/them reader #edward cullen x gn!reader #edward cullen x reader #fluff #comfort

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douglysium · 1 month

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Episode 12 TMP Quick Thoughts

Housekeeping and Prologue

Hello, this is Douglysium and you might not know me as that guy who wrote over 100 pages of analysis on the Eye (which can be read on Tumblr here (https://douglysium.tumblr.com/post/735599414228484097/the-relationships-between-the-dread-powers-the) or Google Docs here (The Relationships Between the Dread Powers: The Eye- Knowledge is Fear and Ignorance is Bliss)) or as that guy who wrote an article on the Extinction (which can be read on Tumblr here(https://douglysium.tumblr.com/post/717929126195003392/what-would-avatars-of-the-extinction-be-like-a) and Google Docs here(What would Avatars of the Extinction be like?: A TMA Speculation)). Suffice to say I might be a bit of a TMA fan. Also, spoilers for TMP up until episode 10. You can read my ramblings on the last episode here (Episode 11 TMP Quick Thoughts).

However, Protocol offers a very unique opportunity and experience for me because I didn’t actually get into TMA until after it was over and I binged all of it. So this is my first time experiencing something even remotely similar to what the original TMA fans probably experienced when waiting for each episode week by week and slowly having to put everything together with the limited information they had. So I decided to throw my hat into the ring since this might be my only chance to do something similar. However, I’m working on some longer form TMA content so I can’t spend as much time on these articles giving a bunch of super detailed thoughts. I will try to keep these short and that inevitably might mean some could have questions about why I think or predict certain things and in those cases I would probably recommend you read at least some of the two articles I mentioned above to get a better idea of where I’m coming from. This also means I won’t be giving you a play-by-play of every single thing that happens in the episode so I encourage you to listen to or read them yourselves and feel free to comment if you feel something is important.

These reviews are probably going to end up focusing mostly on the Entities and their manifestations as they are what I have thought about the most and spent the most time interpreting and there’s been a lot of… interesting theories floating around about how the Entities are manifesting that I want to go over.

Finally, I’m just going to say it right now, spoiler warning for all of The Magnus Archives. I know that Jon and co said one could start with Protocol and be fine, and while that’s probably true, media like this tends to be made in conversation with or take into consideration what came before it in the irl chronology in order to connect them. While I’m sure you could skip The Magnus Archives, I don't really see the point of skipping over it when we are already getting characters from TMA showing up in TMP in Protocol. So to me it’s pretty clear that if we want to understand the full picture of TMP and all the things it is trying to say then we can’t just try to pretend TMA doesn’t exist or scrub it away. Just because you could understand what’s happening without the context in broad strokes doesn’t mean you're getting all the nuances.

These articles are meant to be quick and short so sorry if there’s typos and if I don’t address every possible question or possibility. I don’t want to repeat myself too much in this series outside of the prologue so be sure to skim some of my other articles.

Episode 12 “Getting Off”

I think this episode is definitely one of the more straightforward Protocol episodes we have gotten so far, so hopefully this Quick Thoughts won’t br too long (but knowing me I probably just jinxed it).

We take in the scene through a CCTV in the breakroom of the OIAR at night. The transcripts clarify that Celia is very tired and searching through the cupboards for something and it is quickly made apparent that she is looking for tea and, since the break room has run out, Sam gives Celia a teabag from a secret stash that he apparently has. Sam then asks Celia out on a date and while she is busy at the moment she does show that she is willing to go out with Sam on “Saturday, 6? under the clock at Leicester Square. That work? We’ll go for dinner- well, breakfast- you know what I mean.” Once again, we see that the OIAR jobs appear to be very exhausting and have odd work hours. I also wonder what Celia’s end goal is. Does she genuinely like Sam or does she see him as means to an end. Is Celia here to help Sam and co or is she here to harm them?

As Celia leaves, Alice walks in and proceeds to make fun of Sam for clearly being extremely nervous as he asked out Celia. Alice says “(normal again) You know it’s rude to have absolutely no game? Christ, all these years and you still ask people out like a baby foal learning to tapdance.” A reference to the fact that she and Sam dated at some point, and how Sam probably acted very similarly when trying to ask her out. Sam does point out “Look it worked didn’t it?” which seems like it could be a sort of double meaning. Sam’s nervous approach got Celia to agree to a date but also Alice presumably agreed to go out with him in the past too.

Sam apologizes to Alice for dragging her to the ruins of the Institute only to fund nothing… well nothing Sam and Alice know about since something escaped the Institute. Sam says he’s done with Magnus stuff and Alice responds with “So you’re telling me that if I had a case full of emails with the title “Magnus Institute re: Samama Khalid – Massive Conspiracy” you wouldn’t be tempted?” to which Sam says no before asking “You don’t, though. Do you? That was just, like, a joke. Right?” Alice then says “Come on, for now let’s just focus on getting you as jaded and apathetic as possible.” Considering that Alice does appear to be pretty jaded about listening to the cases and piecing them together this could be related to her point about ignoring the talkers and not getting caught up in thinking too much about what’s happening.

NORRIS starts expositing the next case

“Claim Review: EL-56920

Policy Holder: Soho Jack’s Ltd.

Policy Number: 548651-656

Policy Type: Employers’ Liability

Site Address: Soho Jack’s, 9 Carlisle St, London W1D 3BK

Affected Employee: Ms. Jordan Bennett

Date of Incident: 9 March 2024

Incident Location: On site.

Documentation: Crime Report – Submitted

Medical Practitioner Report – Submitted

Incident Book Entry – Submitted First Aider’s Report – Submitted

Supervisor’s incident Report - Submitted

HSE communications - Submitted

Health-And-Safety policies - Submitted

Employment Contract - Submitted

Claim Valuation: £1,560,000 Assessment

Conclusion: Claim Denied Reason: Fraudulent claim (see incident description and police report)”

This, along with some information Jordan mentions later, means Jordan is suing Soho Jack’s Ltd. They go on to say that their lawyer has advised them to cooperate with Soho Jack’s insurance claim as a show of good faith, even if they’re planning on “suing your asses to kingdom-come.” They start recounting an event that occurred on the company’s property and apologize for their terrible handwriting (which we later learn is probably because Mr. Bonzo bit off one of their hands).

They go over how they started working at Jack’s in the spring of 2021 after they had finished Flair Academy. After struggling to find a job they managed to get an interview and then job at the aforementioned Jack’s. The club seems to have a good reputation as Jordan refers to it as “the Soho Gentleman’s club.” The company’s building “...has dances on the bottom two floors with VIP suites for hire above with a dedicated bouncer keeping them separate. Really, it’s just a quieter box with a private bar, some comfy chairs and the option of private dancers.” Despite this being “THE” Soho Gentleman’s club Jordan says “It’s always booked up with swank dickheads trying to show off, but Stags are the worst: they’re cheap, they’re loud, they drink too much, tip too little and only ever hire one dance for the groom. Plus there’s always some “nice guy” that won’t shut up about exploitation without even bothering to stop staring.”

Jordan begins to explain how the party the specific party that led to them wanting to sue Jack’s. They state that this specific party’s lot was not the worst and were “Just a bunch of heavyset, middle-aged lads with names like Ozzer, or Rozzer or whatever. ” and notes that “The groom was fine, acted embarrassed even though he was obviously keen and they were easily pleased. ”

“They started giving the groom gifts. Same old tat as always, cufflinks, poo gags, all the standard stuff. Then the groom spotted the last one on the table, this cheap yellow and purple kids lunch box. It looked old and shoddy and no one admitted to bringing it but the groom just squealed with glee and carefully opened it before pulling out a bunch old souvenir merch. Pencils, postcards, keyrings, all sorts of crap, all the same yellow and purple and last of all a cracked CD case. When they saw it the whole bunch gave this big laughing cheer.” I have talked about how I think Mr. Bonzo is probably tied to The Stranger if we view him through the lens of Smirke’s 14. I will retread some of those reasons later but right now I want to point out that no one admitted to bringing the Bonzo CD. It could simply be that it’s a prank and someone happened to grab an artifact or something tied to Bonzo, and maybe someone from the OIAR even planted it there, but it could also be connected to the idea of The Stranger and the fear of the unknown because it could be that no one actually knows who got that CD.

We also know that The Stranger is no… stranger to dropping off or delivering strange artifacts in order to feed on the fear of people interacting with unknown /mysterious objects. Breekon and Hope’s delivery service are a good example of this (strangers that show up and drop off never before seen or uncanny objects and artifacts).

“I could see which way the wind was turning and sure enough the bestman came over and asked if he could play it. The cover had this awful comic sans title: “Mr. Bonzo’s On His Way” and I wasn't exactly thrilled by this.” Jordan explains that “Mr. Bonzo was way before my time and from what I had seen online he had always looked pretty messed up. But hey, it was their night, if they wanted to spend it on some cringy nostalgia trip, who was I to say no?” Which could mean that Jordan doesn’t know a lot about Mr. Bonzo, and lack of familiarity with something is one of the things that we know entities like The Stranger love to prey on.

“This kind of thing happened often enough that we kept a battered old CD Player in the back that we could patch into the room's speakers, just in case. So, I ducked back there, put it on, turned the volume down as low as I could get away with, and prayed it wasn’t too obnoxious. Immediately the cheering children��s voices blared out the speakers accompanied by bouncy tubas loud enough to drown out the rest of the club’s music. It was awful but I could hear the lads stamping the floor in rhythm and as the kids started singing the men were singing along: “Mr. Bonzo’s on his way, he wants to stay, he wants to play! Mr. Bonzo’s on his way, he wants to stay, he wants to play!” If you want to listen to the song Jordan is referring to it is actually available on Youtube: Mr Bonzo (from 'The Magnus Protocol'). Maybe you can put yourself in the shoes of an annoyed Jordan or ecstatic old man at the club.

Jordan clearly finds the song annoying and after waiting a minute, in order to avoid being a “total killjoy,” they decide to turn off the song before “ Derek came down from the office to “have a word.” I assume Jordan meant Derek would complain about the music. However, when Jordan turns the CD player off it “...just grew louder, rattling the glassware in the bar: “Mr. Bonzo’s on his way, he wants to stay, he wants to play!” I even yanked the cables from the speakers, but it just kept getting louder.” Obviously, something supernatural is going on but Jordan reasonably assumes that the player just broke and begins to reach for their walkie talkie in order to call for some tech support. However, as they do so they are interrupted by a massive crash coming from another part of the room followed by a cheer. Jordan gets ready to reprimand the party goers for whatever mess they might have made but instead sees Mr. Bonzo. “It was hunched in the doorway, a bulbous figure with a purple hat that cast crazed shadows in all directions thanks to the club’s lighting effects. Then it doffed its hat and pushed itself into the room, foam catching on the doorframe with a squeak that set my teeth on edge. Its massive bulbous google-eyes seemed to roam all over the room before settling on the groom and it was almost as if the huge toothy grin grew wider when it saw him.” We know that Gwen delivered a name and address to Bonzo and in the previous episode Lena even tells Gwen “I’m sure you’ve already worked that out. But just in case you haven’t, keep an eye on the case loads over the next few days. It should become abundantly clear.” Implying that this could be the case Lena was alluding to or that the groom (or someone else in the room) is Bonzo’s target (but it’s almost definitely the groom).

Everyone in the room assumes the appearance of Bonzo is some sort of gift or prank and “The rugby boys were tripping over themselves to get in and hug it, laughing and pushing the groom to the front and so I figured at that point it was a prank. Again, none of them took credit for it and there was a moment of genuine hesitation, until one of them yelled out “It's ya lapdance, Baz!” and they all fell about laughing.” Jordan is furious that a coworker named Joey presumably let Bonzo in and the idea that Joey might have bailed on Jordan again by “ducking out for a smoke.” But as Jordan moves forward they notice something- “I began to stride over, readying for the inevitable complaints then hesitated as I saw something far more unnerving than the ugly costume that was capering with the groom in the middle of the group. There was a pair of heavy boots on their side, poking just inside the still open doorway. Joey’s boots, and they weren't moving. Just then the google eyes looked turned to me, and a puffy finger raised cheekily to its mouth.” So Joey was killed by Bonzo and all the while “the men had all started chanting “Bonzo! Bonzo! Bonzo”, stamping their feet and banging the tables in a circle around the pair in the center…” and the music kept getting louder. So loud that it began to sound distorted from the strain the song was putting on the speakers.

Out of all the Entities the Slaughter seems to have a pretty strong connection to music but The Stranger also has a strong precedent for music. For example, The Calliope in TMA is an artifact tied to The Stranger. In MAG 024 (Strange Music) it is mentioned that the instrument has "Be still, for there is strange music" carved into the cover of the keyboard. While The Slaughter’s connection to music is probably due to an association between rhythm and war (think the marching of an army or the phrase “drums of war”) as well as the fear of “violent” music, The Stranger’s connection to music seems to come from the idea of either strange unknown sounds or a song / sound that sounds really uncanny. It is noted by Jordan that Mr. Bonzo’s song grows louder and more distorted overtime which would mean that the song is becoming more and more incomprehensible as it would slowly change into a song with lyrics you couldn’t understand or identify as easily. It could also be that the song sounds uncanny in the sense that it is familiar in some ways but something is off about it.

Jordan tries to call for help on his walkie talkie but can only hear Mr. Bonzo’s theme blaring out of its tiny speaker. Jordan tries to warn everyone and get out but no one can hear him over the music. Bonzo takes the groom and begins to “dance” with him by spinning around faster and faster until Bonzo decides to rip his arms off and even as this act of gorey brutality took place the other party goers present continued to laugh and laugh until Jordan’s scream caused them to realize this wasn’t some sort of prank. Almost everyone begins to yell in terror but some yelled in rage and proceeded to attack Bonzo: “A few of the bigger guys picked up chairs or bottles and began to beat and slash at the thing. It didn’t seem to notice, its bulbous, bloodshot, eyes staying fixed on the groom’s body as it raised it overhead.” Bonzo then proceeds to continue pulverizing the body by smashing it against the ground over and over.

“For a split second, all was still but the music just pounded on, barely recognizable now over the distortion from the smoking speakers as those voices, no longer childlike, still chanted the words “He’s here to stay… He wants to play…”” “Then Mr. Bonzo turned towards us with its head bowed almost reverentially and everybody went silent. Slowly, awfully slowly, it raised its head, titling it coquettishly to one side. Then the seams across its face split revealing its gaping maw filled with even larger, sharper teeth.” Jordan admits that they don’t remember much about what happened after that but “I dream about it most nights. In the dream it digs through all those men to get to me, grabbing fistfuls of them and throwing them to smash against the wall. The strobe fires as its hands plunge into the pile of us and each flash shows a little less flesh between me and it, between me and all those teeth… finally everyone else is gone. I raise my arm to protect myself and it gently but inexorably lifts it into its mouth, smiles and bites… None of us was left whole but I was the luckiest. All I lost was a hand, it wasn’t even my dominant one.” The biting was set up previously in episode 10 when the transcripts mention “Gwen holds out the envelope and Mr Bonzo snatches it into his mouth, audibly chewing it. His teeth are not soft.”

Jordan says that they “told the investigators everything I know, doctors too. I don't know why nobody outside the room heard or saw anything, why the cameras weren't working, why it let me live. But I do know why there weren't any bodies. All I actually want is my hand back so I can tend bar but that isn’t going to happen is it? So I’ll have to settle for the next best thing and sue you for everything I can get, because I don’t know what happened that night but it was in your venue and no one came to help. Not Derek, not another doorman, no one. So yeah, you’d better have one hell of a settlement waiting for me, or I'll see you in court.”

While you could make an argument for themes of Entities like The Desolation, Flesh, Hunt, etc. I’m still going to primarily argue for Bonzo being tied to The Stranger or a similar Entity due to what we see in his previous appearances. For the sake of clarity, if there is any debate about what The Stranger embodies in MAG 200 it is stated “And as they learned to know their friends and kin, so too did they learn to fear the unknown figure, the coming of the stranger” and in MAG 092 (Nothing Beside Remains) Jonah tells Jon “We thrive on ceaseless watching, on knowing too much. What we face is the hidden, the uncanny, and the unknown.” while in MAG 111 (Family Business) Jon says “The Stranger is the unknown. The uncanny.” and Gerard doesn’t correct him.

However, a lot of Mr. Bonzo’s behaviours in previous episodes resembles The Stranger (and The Stranger has violently attacked or killed people in the past). Mr. Bonzo is also described as being a clown. Something we know The Stranger has a precedent for manifesting as, probably due to both the idea of the uncanny valley being achieved with a costume or makeup and the idea of a traveling circus full of strangers you don’t know from out of town in addition to a clown costume acting as a disguise that can obscure whoever is wearing it. Not to mention that Mr. Bonzo is described as a suit, which could very easily connect to an Entity like The Stranger. Firstly, The Stranger tends to have a big emphasis on wearing things like skins and suits. Additionally, Gwen mentions in episode 11 “That… abomination wasn’t a costume. That was skin. It was sagging, it was sweaty!” and we know The Stranger has a tendency for wearing skin, skinning things (such as with taxidermy), etc. as a form of disguise, in order to hide itself, or to metaphorically rob something of their identity.

This also applies to costumes in general since usually wearing costumes or disguises can actually obscure who is wearing them and thus their true identity is unknown. There’s also the fact that costumes themselves can easily fall into the uncanny valley. Ever since Five Nights at Freddy’s became popular there’s been an uptick in horror media focusing on how creepy and uncanny things like animatronic suits can be. Not that Mr. Bonzo is an animatronic but it is a suit. Also, Bonzo apparently has hard teeth and having solid teeth on a suit could look uncanny.

The surprise gift and sudden appearance of Bonzo that others assume is some sort of surprise or prank could also tie into The Stranger and the idea of something mysteriously appearing or not being expected. Bonzo was originally made to prank celebrities. As Nigel explains in episode 10 that his produce ““inviting a famous person on, someone really serious, and we tell them we’re going to have them do a segment with a popular children’s entertainer. Now, obviously these folks won’t have any idea about what kids are actually watching, so we could come up with the most horrendous thing, claim kids loved it and see how long it took for the guest to realize that they were the joke. That they’d been “berried”” and “The problem with a surprise prank is that doing it on Saturday night primetime means pretty soon everyone knows about it, and the guests knew it was coming. A couple even requested it. So the prank part of it sort of died, and he just became an SOS mascot. One of my many tormentors in the dungeon. By the end we’d even retired Mr. Six, and it was all Bonzo.” Once again, a focus on surprise and I think it’s interesting that Bonzo loses his punch the more people know about and understand him. Bonzo is a character that thrived specifically on the guests not knowing who he was and did. So a potential relationship with the unknown again.”

In episode 10 Nigel says to Gwen ““Try not to stare. He doesn’t like it when people stare.” Which could relate to The Stranger. While all the Entities are connected, overlap, and need each other for a ritual bringing them into the world to work, with even seemingly opposing Entities bleeding into each other or having overlapping fears, The Stranger can often have an antagonistic relationship with The Eye and forms of being known. The Stranger tends to thrive off the fear of being unknown so staring at something aligned with The Stranger might make it react negatively. In MAG 092 (Nothing Beside Remains) Jonah tells Jon “We thrive on ceaseless watching, on knowing too much. What we face is the hidden, the uncanny, and the unknown.” In MAG 165 (Revolutions) Not-Sasha says this in regards to The Eye’s Post-Change world “Do you know how it feels? To be – anonymous? And yet known! To have all the sweetest dread I can create tainted by the relentless gaze of that damned Eye. I’ve suffered enough.” So if my theory that Bonzo is tied to something like The Stranger is correct, that could explain a potentially negative reaction to being looked at for too long since aspects of The Stranger often don’t like it when people try to figure out what they are. This could ring extra true if it does turn out that the OIAR is somehow connected to The Eye.

Bonzo’s eating and biting could potentially be linked to The Stranger’s tendency for odd uncanny behavior, like that time Breekon / Hope ate a butterfly. The fact that this monster looks like Bonzo could also be related to the idea of the uncanny, since he would resemble Bonzo but behave and look a bit off. Also, it seems hard to tell if Bonzo is a costume or a monster resembling a costume which makes it harder to know what he is for sure, and The Stranger loves playing up mystery (think how we never know which character is Breekon and which character is Hope from Breekon and Hope in TMA, and Jon describes one of them as “one half of Breekon and Hope”). Also, Bonzo can only say his name which means you never really know what he’s saying or talking about.

Bonzo killing everyone in the room but leaving someone alive is not a completely unheard of idea. The Entities in general often seem to leave witnesses if in doing so more fear is generated and we see creatures like the Not-Them kill and replace people while ensuring that at least one person remembers what the original persona actually looked like even if no one else does. The reason for this is because if the Not-Them’s disguise was perfect and changed every bit of memory and evidence then there wouldn’t be anyone to be afraid of the idea that someone they know has been replaced by a stranger.

Jordan mentions “I don't know why nobody outside the room heard or saw anything, why the cameras weren't working, why it let me live. But I do know why there weren't any bodies.” which emphasizes his confusion about what’s happening. While confusion is often tied to The Spiral, in this case it stems from a bunch of unknown factors and variables, like why there were no other witnesses and why the cameras weren’t working.” As far as there being no witnesses and the cameras failing to work, the Entities are known for usually being on the downlow and not common knowledge but Entities like The Stranger tend to thrive off the fear of mystery and have a precedent for things like mysterious disappearances or hiding people / things. The Calliope I mentioned earlier mysteriously disappeared from the Institute’s archives at some point in TMA and in MAG 092 (Nothing Beside Remains) Jonah tells Jon “We thrive on ceaseless watching, on knowing too much. What we face is the hidden, the uncanny, and the unknown.” Jonah specifically mentions that The Stranger has a connection to “the hidden” among other things. In MAG 102 (Nesting Instinct) Jonah even says that The Stranger essentially hid Jon from him when saying “I was doing everything in my power to locate you. Everyone was working on finding the ritual site.” and “[Irritated] I am sorry, John, that my powers have not yet reached the level of omniscience.” Jordan does say that they know why there weren’t any bodies which implies that Mr. Bonzo probably ate them.

Jordan having trouble remembering exactly what happened actually does have a precedent with The Stranger since the Entity does have connections to memory loss or a loss of identity. In MAG 165 (Revolutions) we see Not-Sasha watch over a Domain that takes the form of a merry-go-round with people fighting over faces. People with no faces must fight over the faces of others to rip them off and regain some sense of identity. When they lose their face it is said “And soon enough they will forget they ever even had one, rest assured; it’s best to step the dance and keep your face secured as much as you are able. Just. Keep. Running.” Jon and co also face memory loss when they interrupt The Stranger’ ritual in TMA and forget who they are and what they are doing for a period of time.

Some other Entities this statement parallels are that of The Slaughter (with sudden brutal and gory violence), The Flesh (via bodily disfigurement by way of losing a hand, Bonzo being described as releasing “some vile mixture of putrid water, rotten foam and rancid meat.” when cut at some point, and Bonzo biting into people), The End (a lot of people brutally die), The Corruption (from the aforementioned vile mixture pouring out of Bonzo), and even The Eye (with the strange and horrifying dreams Jordan is forced to relive over and over resembling how people who give Jon live statements are forced to relive said moments in the form of nightmares over and over). Like always, I have to at least touch on the fact that The Eye doesn’t seem to just be the fear of being watched but also being a witness to something you don’t want to see. Jon can force people to recount and relive terrible moments, Jonah can force information into the heads of people like Melanie and Martin, and in MAG 200 The Eye is stated to have been born from the fear of one’s own eyes showing them too much.

All this being said, I still think the OIAR is somehow connected to The Eye. There’s the cases being like statements but also the fact that they supply sensitive information (such as names and locations) to things like Mr. Bonzo. People like Jonah could almost always know one’s location thanks to their Eye powers and The Eye is connected to the fear of someone / something knowing too much about you (such as knowing where and who you are). I wonder why Bonzo was sent to kill this particular groom when he was just partying? Did the groom know something or overstep some line or was the groom just some sort of offering to appease Mr. Bonzo? How was this person’s name and address obtained? Was it just mundane tracking or something closer to Jonah’s clairvoyance? Nigel acted like he was doing the OIAR a favor so right now it seems like this was a target decided by the OIAR and not necessarily Nigel. Unless you want to argue that the “favor” is aiding in keeping Bonzo pacified, under wraps, or something potentially more mutually beneficial. I wonder if Jordan’s dreams are somehow connected to being directly involved in a case or facing an External of the OIAR? It could also simply be that Jordan is traumatized.

We cut to Gwen and the transcripts say she “is sat at her desk, stunned by what she has just heard.” and she only says “Jesus Christ…” I wonder if this is because the case is unusually brutal or gorey when compared to most others or if she realized there’s a connection between the letter she delivered and what happens in this case. Considering what Lena said it's very possible that some of the cases the OIAR gets are connected to the activity of their own Externals (such as Mr. Bonzo).

ALICE CONT.

“Gwen? Hello?”

GWEN

“(dazed) What?”

Getting sucked into a statement like this and statements having a negative impact on one’s mental state are both things we have seen in TMA. Jon had a hard time stopping once he started a statement and at one point Jon expresses worry that Martin was listening to a bunch of statements for Peter Lukas and his plan in regards to The Extinction. Although, it could be that Gwen is merely shocked.

Gwen explains that she met one of the Externals but Alice seems to think Gwen is just referring to some annoying assholes as opposed to any supernatural monsters that takes the form of beloved childhood characters.

Gwen seems to finally wonder the question that I’ve been wondering for a while now:

GWEN

“What do you think we’re actually doing, here at the O.I.A.R.?”

ALICE

“Apart from mortgaging our mental health for a wage packet?”

GWEN

“We’ve both been here long enough to know this place. We’re not doing good. We’re not just sifting random data. There’s something wrong here.”

ALICE

“What are you getting at?”

GWEN

“You never wonder what the point is? Who benefits from all this awfulness?”

ALICE

“I don’t wonder. I know.”

GWEN

(sitting up) “What? Really?”

ALICE

“(portentous) Oh yeah. I’ve known for a while. What we’re doing here, it’s all part of a grand plan to satisfy one of the most unspeakable evils known to mankind... “

Gwen’s on the edge of her seat.

ALICE

“(almost a whisper) …the UK government.”

In TMA the point of the Institute sifting through statements and stuff was twofold. Firstly, to feed The Eye but also to set up the lynchpin for The Eye’s ritual with the position of the Archivist. I wonder if something similar is going on here but I can’t say since while you could argue that being an Externals Liaison is like the Archivist and shares the role as being a “living chronicle of fear” (especially since Lena remarked that Gwen should show fear via screaming because Externals tend to like that) Gwen had to blackmail her way into that position. I have no idea who was the Externals Liaison before her or if there are other Liaisons, if there even was one(s) before / with Gwen at all. Also, unlike the Institute, the OIAR is explicitly connected to the government and is meant to respond to things (not just watch). So it’s very likely that the OIAR has a role that is different from just “The Mass Ritual / Institute 2.0.” They could still be gathering fear related to the statements and being observed like the Institute in TMA though. However, even the Institute still wanted the Archival staff to do a good job following up statements and stuff. Jon tries to reorganize the Archives after Gertrude purposefully left them disorganized and Tim corrects Jon about some errors he made when reading some statements. The OIAR doesn’t really seem to care how well or poorly their workers categorize the cases and I don’t know if anyone checks.

Alice’s joke about the greatest evil known to mankind being the UK government feels like foreshadowing considering that the OIAR, and by extension all the Externals like Bonzo, are connected to the government.

Alice’s comment “Apart from mortgaging our mental health for a wage packet?” references how stressful this job seems to be.

Conclusion

Yeah, idk. This was a very simple episode overall and it mostly just seemed like it was following up Lena’s point about paying attention to the caseload.

Okay, hold on, before I end this I figured I should actually try to look at the voices in the computer system a bit more closely, since quite frankly, like with the alchemy symbols, I’ve admittedly been neglecting them and not focusing on them as much as I should have. This is because I actually couldn’t tell if there was any kind of correlation between the voices and the kinds of cases they read but a video by Maddie’s Maxis called “This Channel's First Video - The Magnus Protocol Analysis and Theories” (which you can view here This Channel's First Video - The Magnus Protocol Analysis and Theories) hypothesizes that there is actually a correlation. As we all know two of the computer voices sound like Martin and Jon and Maddie argues that the kinds of statements the voices read correspond to something that had to do with the character. For example, in theory NORRIS (Martin’s voice) tends to have statements relating to self-loathing and loneliness. I don’t know what they are feeding Maddie but Maddie is potentially cooking here. So I decided to glance over at some of the statements and see if there are any patterns.

I’m going to start with the theme that seems the most concrete in my opinion. The cases that NORRIS (Martin’s voice) reads seem to often be tied to themes of isolation, losing loved ones, or feeling abandoned. I should make it clear that while I know Martin in TMA is connected to The Lonely I am not saying all the cases NORRIS reads are connected to The Lonely. The mere presence of feeling alone or isolated doesn’t automatically make a statement Lonely related in the same way someone dying, getting attacked, or something taking place at night or in darkness automatically means End, Slaughter, or Dark respectively. Also, it’s important to remember that every Entity, even seemingly opposing ones, have overlap, shared fears, commonalities, etc..

But let’s look at the cases to see if this pattern is really there. The case NORRIS covers in episode 1 involves the Anglerfish, or something resembling it, killing and replacing their romantic partner. Harriet even says “And that voice I have loved for twenty years answered: “Some of him.”” So loss of a loved one.

In episode 3 NORRIS covers a case in which Dr. Samuel seems to feel immense guilt and sorrow about the death of Maddie. Once again, the loss of a close loved one.

In episode 8 NORRIS goes over a report Terrance submits about the effects of brutal liminalism. While no one dies or is replaced in the actual events of the case, Terrance does mention “originally took my role as a night janitor at Forton following a protracted divorce which cost me the majority of my friendships.” So while their partner isn’t dead they did lose a loved one, and if you read my thoughts on that episode you know that I actually think the case has a lot of similarities with The Lonely. The fog, the vaguely familiar but impossible to understand gibberish, people with repeating features, being isolated in a dark void, etc.. Even if you disagree that it’s The Lonely there is still a connection to themes of losing someone close and being alone.

If there was an episode to disprove this theory it would probably be episode 12 since it’s just Bonzo murdering a room full of people. Jordan does say “I don't know why nobody outside the room heard or saw anything” and earlier in the case they mention that they believed their coworker by the name of Joey the doorman might have ditched him again but this definitely feels a bit more like a stretch. Jordan does seem to blame the establishment for what happened and this is because from the perspective of Jordan no one came to help despite how obvious and loud the commotion was. Which could maybe tie into the idea of being abandoned or left alone but this is definitely pushin it and it’s clear that our understanding of what kinds of cases each voice reads might expand as the series goes on.

Maddie argues that CHESTER (Jonathon’s voice) seems to usually cover cases related directly to the Magnus Institute. Which is generally true, CHESTER covers the cases of RedCanary spelunking in the Institute’s ruins in episode 1, and the gambling dice being submitted to the Institute in episode 9 for example. But CHESTER also covers the case about Tom wanting to watch Voyeur in episode 5, the case regarding Hilltop Center in episode 7, Gordon’s encounter with the tattoos and Ink5 during construction in episode 11. It’s very possible that these are just related to the Institute in ways we don’t understand yet, for example some of the characters that appear could be members of the Institute or something, but in my opinion this definitely throws a wrench into some things.

CHESTER seems to have a stronger case for a theme of curiosity and a desire to know in general as opposed to just the Magnus Institute. RedCanary investigates the archives out of curiosity, Tom really wants to see the Voyeur movie for their blog, the narrator explains that they experimented with the gambling dice to figure out how they worked, and Gordon keeps talking about how they “just need to see it. I need to know what’s in the water.” As I’ve mentioned previously, The Eye also has a major emphasis on a desire to know and understand something even if it comes at the cost of yourself and / or other people. Hilltop Center still seems like a bit of an outlier here but while Dianne isn’t spelunking through ruins or anything she does mention that she was looking for people to help her work at the center. Which, while a bit of a stretch, could fit with a theme of curiosity or desire to know in the case of Chester. Or at least the idea of something being searched for as a theme at least.

If you wanted to argue that CHESTER actually related to things being looked for you could say that the case about the gambling dice revolves around the narrator giving the Institute artifacts, and they even say “So yeah, I tell you all about them, how I got them, all that crap and you just… You take them away, right? You accept them? Good. I think. I’m pretty sure that’s how it works. It’s how it worked for me, at least. Put them in whatever vault you like, bury them, drop them in the ocean, for all I care. All that matters is that they’re yours now.” So you could say that the Institute was looking for artifacts. You could also argue that the narrator was looking for people to roll the dice, looking for good luck, or started making their way towards Gary when they found him.

AUGUSTUS has a voice I am not familiar with (and we will get to the popular theory in a moment). I can only recall AUGUSTUS voicing one case, I might be forgetting one or something, so I don’t have a lot to go on. AUGUSTUS could be covering really old statements, as Sam notes the one in episode 4 is from the 18th century, or statements revolving around others climbing their way to their top and doing whatever it takes to do so. It’s kind of unclear until I can see some more AUGUSTUS statements.

There’s also some obvious character associations with this theory. Martin, someone connected to The Lonely, has statements reflecting some kind of isolation or abandonment, Jon, the Archivist with a strong tie to The Eye and someone who was strung along while trying to solve Jonah’s plan and learn the truth about the Entities, has statements involving extreme curiosity or people looking for things, and Jonah, someone who is really old and ruthless (so ruthless that they made the world a fear hellscape in an attempt to avoid death), has had a statement taking place in the 18th century involving someone giving a blood sacrifice to play violin super well.

There’s a popular theory going around that the three voices in the computers are actually Jonathon, Martin, and Jonah, and this definitely seems like one of the more credible theories floating around the community to a degree. AUGUSTUS’ unfamiliar voice could be the voice of Jonah’s original body. Jon, Martin, and Jonah were all in the panopticon when the Change ended which could be the event that got them tied to the computers. It could also have to do with being the pupil of the Eye somehow. Jonah and Jon were both the Eye’s pupil at some point and Jon got his position by killing Jonah to take his spot. It’s possible something weird happened like Martin was about to become the Eye’s pupil after removing Jon from the position, giving them this common link, but I can’t say for sure.

Maddie also points out another big thing to remember in the video. I have mentioned that Annabelle seems generally right about what happens to the Entities’ various Monsters and Avatars after the Entities get pulled into the next universe. Monsters, like potentially the Anglerfish, presumably get sucked into the new universe since they are part of the Entities. Other people may or may not get sucked into the universe depending on how attached they were to the Entity. It’s also possible that they will always just be left behind. However, Annabelle also mentions that it’s possible the Entities will take the aspects of a person that are connected to or are a part of the Entity. So, it’s possible that the parts of Jon, Martin, and Jonah in the computer are not them in their entirety but merely specific aspects of their personality or being. It could literally just be their voices taken by one or more Entities for all we know.

We also know that some Entities, like The End, seem capable of making copies or “memories” of people after / when they die. In MAG 154 (Bloody Mary) Eric states “I know that I’m not really Eric; I’m just a memory someone wrote down. It hurts, most of the time. I don’t like it.” So one could argue that the voices in the computers are not the fully sentient original versions of Jon, Martin, and Jonah but “memories” or copies created by one or more Entities. This could also explain why the third voice might be Jonah even though Jonah potentially died before the Entities jumped universes. This voice could simply be The Eye’s metaphorical recollection of Jonah or Jonah wasn’t completely dead when the Entities switched universes. This also means that the voices in the computers could be more malicious than we first assume if there’s a chance they are in actuality not Jon, Martin, and Jonah or are in truth aspects of The Eye or bits of their personalities trying to achieve a specific goal.

As I’ve mentioned previously, the cases the voices read out don’t seem to be completely random. The second Sam is about to give up his search for the Magnus Institute CHESTER spits out a case that is perfect for reigniting his curiosity with the addition of a new clue, and when Celia takes the job the first case she gets is about Hilltop Center (which could relate to Celia’s questions about multiversal and time travel). I still can’t say if the CHESTER or any other of the computers are trying to help Sam or use him for more nefarious purposes.

I’m not super confident about this being the patterns the computers follow at the moment because frankly there isn’t a lot of cases to go off of, and I need to see more AUGUSTUS. It’s also possible that the cases are more variable or context dependant. What the voices read could depend on the person at the computer, for example: it’s possible CHESTER reads a bunch of cases connected to the Institute because that’s what Sam was most interested in. There are also some cases we don’t have enough context behind yet, for example the mysterious figure in the Hilltop Road case could be connected to something like the Institute in some way, or that some of the voices focus on certain Externals Liaisons, people, etc..

If you want another TMAGP theory video to watch here’s one by Pinkelotje: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MX51EHLy7BQ&ab_channel=pinkelotje.

#tmagp #tma #the magnus protocol #the magnus archives #theory

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gin-juice-tonic · 9 months

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Hey there! I have a friend who wants to write a character with OCD, but I'm worried that she might not have a fully accurate image of what it is. I don't really know many people with OCD, but if you could could you give some tips to pass on to her? Sorry if this is weird, and you don't have to answer this if you don't want to. I just thought it would be better to get information from someone who is affected by OCD than skim an article about it. Thanks again (p.s. I really love your comics!!)

This is going to go under a cut cause i wrote more than I really intended. It's very long. I put a video clip of a character who I think is a good representation in media at the end if you decide you dont want to read all of that and just skip down there.

The thing is that OCD varies a lot from person to person. My experiences arent gonna look the same as someone else's who also has it. Some people have very visible symptoms, some people have things that are still obviously ocd symptoms but would only be recognized by someone who knew what to look for, some people only have mental symptoms - you wouldnt be able to tell unless you were a mind reader. And just like any other disorder it has a range of severity.

Also not everyone's triggered by the same things. I know you said you'd rather hear from a person than an article, but I think she should look at articles that detail what typical obsessions are (Though she should go in knowing these thoughts are beyond people's control. They're sometimes extremely upsetting, and theyre of course upsetting to the person who has them. They may be very hard to read if you arent well-versed in this stuff.) In fiction I usually see perfection and contamination, but there are wayyyy more than that. Some triggers come and go even. One day I can be completely fine about something and encountering it a different day it might take me 3 months to stop spiraling about it.

An important thing that IS spread across everyone who has it is that giving into compulsions makes things worse. They are a feeling of momentary relief that can fade incredibly quickly, which is what leads people to do them over and over and over again much to the detriment of the person doing it.

There is not a lot of rhyme or reason to it. And it cannot be logic-ed with. You could be the smartest, most level headed, logical person in the world, but you cannot logic your way out of obsessive thoughts. (This usually creates an obsessive thought spiral even, which is bad and can be dangerous...)

Adding onto that, she should think hard about whether the character would know they have OCD or not. The public perception of OCD is not great. Most people dont understand what it looks like, including people who have it. And the people who do have it often feel like they cannot talk about it. (I was encouraged by a psychiatrist to never! talk about the intrusive thoughts I have to ANYONE. She sucked, but it shows the attitude that surrounds the disorder.) And whether they know or not will make a big difference in how they view themself and their mental health. Personally when I did not know I had it I was doing a lot worse mentally. A lot. Frankly it very nearly drove me to suicide. And then I found out what it was, and it helped. It didnt magically make things disappear of course, but it helped.

She also might be tempted to make the characters symptoms manifest in ways that are comedic or silly. I am not bothered by this necessarily, I think a lot of the things I do are silly and would be perceived as funny by an outsider. But if she is going to do this I ask that she makes sure she shows how frustrating and embarrassing it is for the character. If you want an example, there is a character in the show Scrubs with OCD. (Side note, Scrubs is rated TV-14 so turn back now if youre too young but)

His name is Dr Kevin Casey, though you could probably just find his scenes from looking up Scrubs OCD. He is played off as a jovial man whose disorder makes him quirky, but he is given a scene in which you can really see the toll it takes on him. One line he says "Nobody's supposed to see this" hits especially hard.

So if that was too long and you didnt read most of it the number one important thing I'd personally ask is however inconvenient this characters OCD is going to be to everyone else Id like her to make sure she shows that its a million times more inconvenient to the person who has it.

#suicide mention #tw suicide mention #ask stuff #cw ocd #long post

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prolix-yuy · 23 days

Text

20 questions for fic writers

Thank you for the tag @oonajaeadira! Funny enough I saw this go around a couple months ago and meant to do it, then life got crazy. This seems like a great time to jump on in!

How many works do you have on ao3?

48! Wowza! That's not counting fics I only post here (like my Writers Iron Chefs and the Bangathon)

2. What's your total ao3 word count?

338,089. That's kind of crazy, I'm not gonna lie. And some of those words aren't filthy :P

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The Pedro Pascal Cinematic Universe!

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

Something New, One Very Good Night, Both Sides of the Door, A Sweet Response to Tragedy, and Good Company. 4 out of 5 of these are from I Think of You, which does warm my little heart. I did laugh that their popularity is completely out of order from the series.

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes yes yes! Every single one I get! I'll even yank your tags out and comment on them when they make me especially happy. It's the best part of sharing my stories.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

TECHNICALLY One Very Good Night had the angstiest ending before I continued the series. Same with Cognitive Dissonance! Apparently I get to an angsty end then just write a part 2.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I think that's tied with the real ending to my Whiskey & Westworld series, and all the gooey soft fun of my Javi G series. Both make my heart glow in different ways.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Knock on wood, nothing so far. I've gotten a couple of interpretations of my fics that have made me cock my head because I just don't think the person read the story, or if they did they skimmed over the character development part. But otherwise I've had a very nice time with everyone here <3

9. Do you write smut?

If you don't know by now, I'm not sure what you've been reading...

10. Craziest crossover?

100% Whiskey & Westworld. Golden Circle meets android theme park? Lusting over cowboys and having existential crises? It fit better than I ever thought it would and I still love the crap out of it.

(though as a side note, having Javi P be the person who helped Santi find his girls in the SW!Frankie AU is another fav)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I hope not? Yeesh.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but that would be pretty neat!

13. Have you co-written a fic before?

No, but I have had the distinct pleasure of @psychedelic-ink writing a fic in the SW!Frankie AU that made my whole life.

14. All time favorite ship?

HELP I'M TORN. It's a tie between Din and my Reader in I Think of You and Dieter and Murch in Best Laid Plans. I think about both of them so so so much.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will

I have a handful of small WIPs in a folder that who knows if they'll come to fruition. I think the greatest contender is probably the Post-Apocalyptic Frankie I tossed around because The Last of Us came out and it might just meld into a Joel story instead.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm good at pacing and giving enough description to keep a reader engaged but not bogged down with details. People connect with my reader characters in a way that makes me super happy. And I write damn good smut.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I can't write outlines or my brain says "it's done :)" and I never write the story. I can't write out of order. I struggle with making characters have meaningful fights and arguments because I'm non-confrontational IRL and it makes me anxious.

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language

Flavor! I love reading it! I tend to shy away from writing it because as someone who knows another language, it never feels natural to me to throw it in. Pet names are a nice way to use it, and I'll allude to speaking other languages in descriptions, but it's difficult so I tend to not add it much in my stories.

19. First fandom you wrote for

Gundam Wing when I was about eight or nine. Part of my username is in homage to that! My friends and I would write our fanfics and then read them all out loud at sleepovers together. Pre-internet, this was my Tumblr lol.

20. Favorite fic you've written

You know, I love all of my fics a whole damn lot, and my top ones are still hard favs. But I think for a story that came out of my heart in a really nice way and that I hold a little closer than the others, The Plan might just top them a tiny bit.

NP tags: @iamskyereads @psychedelic-ink @julesonrecord @wannab-urs @ezrasbirdie and anyone who wants to play!

#this was fun!#I feel like James Lipton should have been interviewing me

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spaceorphan18 · 4 months

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Have you read the latest script of K&J's podcast about the Michael episode? I'm very interested in hearing your thoughts. They were talking about Jenna acting out and being forced to take time off. And they mentioned being upset because other people were acting out and getting storylines or being given time off to do other things. The later one is def about D since he went to do the musical but I can't believe he would act out for that, it's like totally OOC.

Same anon as before as I was just finishing to read the script. They did indeed talk about Darren being written off and I'm debating if I should listen this time because the way it's written they seem very jealous of him. I'm getting upset by just reading this. So I'm still very curious about your thoughts about it if and when you have the chance to read/listen to it.

I actually figured you guys were all tired of my opinions, lol.

Yes, I did kind of skim the transcript this morning because I saw people talking about it and was curious. And, I have a lot of complicated feelings about the whole thing.

First of all, though, I say this with love to all the Blaine and Darren fans out there -- Kevin and Jenna are never going to be able to be objective when doing this podcast. I keep thinking about all the other rewatch podcasts I listen to, and how all of them - even when discussing things that were hard to go through and/or things that weren't that great with the show - have a level of decorum that Kevin and Jenna just do not have. I do not know why they began this podcast, but digging into the show on a media analysis level just is not where their talents lie.

(Also, I don't think they love Glee the way those other podcasters genuinely love their show and that just colors how they see things. I'll get more into this in a moment...)

And I get that it's frustrating. Believe me, I do. There are plenty of Kurt things they do not talk about that drive me nuts. But at the same time, I feel like the 'recaps' have boiled down to praising Naya, Amber, and themselves; commentating on whatever BTS stuff comes up, and discussing shit on TikTok. I'm not sure why they're even bothering with the 'recaps', tbh.

But guys - if this podcast is upsetting you, if you're finding yourself this anxious or mad or whatever -- it's time to stop. They're not going to change how they do things, and at this point, I'm not entirely sure what you're waiting for from them? Maybe it's time to stop hate listening <3 <3

***

As for the acting out -- I think a lot of the cast probably did. I'm sure Lea was a terror to work with at times. I'm sure Mark probably wasn't easy either. I know Naya spoke up on a lot of things -- though the producers didn't take as much issue with her until the Season 5 drama. Chris was pretty vocal about choices with his character. I can imagine Amber being just as frustrated with Mercedes' lack of anything to do. Didn't Heather say she kept it all inward? And what about Diana who really seems to not ever want to talk about Glee again?

So - who knows what acting out means, tbh.

Keeping all of this in context -- this cast was very tired by the time Season 3 came around. There were too many characters to service, they keep adding ones in, and they were all very young. (And for those of you who are experiencing your early 20s right now? I hate to say this to you -- but you are all still very young.) Added on the fact that the producers clearly did not understand their mental health needs (as evident about how apologetic Ryan Murphy seems to be about all of it) you get a lot of young people expressing their frustration in a lot of different ways over a lot of different things.

I think that Jenna has some very, very complicated feelings about the show -- and in particular about this era because this is where she had a rather big break down. You know what, I do feel for her, because I can see where she's coming from. I can't imagine - feeling like you're tied to a job where everyone around you seems to be getting a better deal than you, and you're trying to be the nice one, and eventually, holding all of that inwardly will make you crack. I'm glad she went to therapy. I kinda hope she's still going to therapy because it seems as though a lot of this is still bothering her.

And I don't really think that Darren, specifically, is ultimately what led to Jenna's breakdown. I think it was a lot of things compounding on each other and Darren on Broadway might have been the last straw that caused her to crack.

I will say (again with all the love to Darren, I adore the guy) there was underground talk that when Darren first got there - he didn't exactly handle his newfound fame in the most eloquent of ways -- in that he was a little on the pompous side. But again, that was age, and by the time Season 4 came around, by all accounts that I came across, he was friends with everyone.

That said - none of this is Darren's fault. It's not Darren's fault that Ryan Murphy handled his young cast and their mental health very badly. It's not Darren's fault that he jumped on opportunities when they arose. It's not Darren's fault that through his natural talents Blaine became a way more popular character than half the original cast. And it's not Darren's fault that Jenna has her own shit to deal with.

***

So, yeah...

I guess those are my thoughts.

And I'm still here enjoying Kurt, Blaine, Chris, and Darren -- and believe it or not, a lot of the show in general. And I don't really listen to Kevin and Jenna's podcast anymore because they just don't care about the things I do -- and that's fine.

#and that's how s.o. sees it #my opinions are surely going to get me into trouble again #it's how i feel and y'all keep asking #i feel like i have more to say but at what point am i repeating myself?

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tiredassmage · 23 days

Text

something something, back to the beginning with 7.5, something something spend nearly half your life doing something, something memories, something totally probably not at all actually related to the plot of the patch, but something something excuse for me to write cheesy flirt lines-- self-indulgent as hell little brainworm of an exchange that may or may not actually happen but i sure as hell had fun putting tyr through it xD loosely inspired by the premise of returning to hutta for 7.5 and name-dropping one of the new characters, so technically some kind of spoilers but. obvs we don't know much and this is just. deeply, deeply self-indulgent fun on my part for now, lol. [but that kind of stuff is under the cut, if that is important to your reading choices <3]

“We have been to Hutta before,” Vector recalls. They step up to the agent’s shoulder as Tyr leans into the doorway, cocking one foot over the other.

Tyr grunts, “Somehow.., I’m inclined to doubt much has changed in…” A grimace starts to pull the agent’s features tighter around his eyes, as if counting the years might make the aches settle deeper. “Oh, twenty years, almost.., isn’t it?”

Vector hums thoughtfully. “Much has changed, agent,” they remind gently, “But… not so much, all the same, we concur.” They watch the agent’s eyes scan the distant swamp for a moment, noting the restless toy of his hands along the fit sleeves of the overcoat he wears.

They recall a saying on the ways of old habits…

“We suppose not all things can improve with age.”

A sharp, loud huff leaves their companion. Vector begins to smile. It’s enough to still Tyr’s hands - they instead fold together across his waist, supporting the agent’s lean. Out of the corner of their eyes, Tyr’s own narrow as they turn on him, mockingly accusatory.

“Vector Hyllus… I’m going to assume good faith.”

“Of course, agent,” they reply. Their smile widens under the mounting suspicion. “We have known plenty to admire a fine vintage.”

Tyr doesn’t quite manage to choke back a bark of laughter beneath a hand flying up to his mouth, nor does it entirely conceal his smile and the brush of color that enters his cheeks. Vector mercifully turns their eyes back out to the smog-hugged buildings awaiting them. Shortly, Tyr clears his throat. “You know I prefer Kaasi brandy myself.”

“Of course. You’ve always had a most enlightening taste, agent.”

Tyr coughs lightly and shakes his head. “Ah… right. So.”

“So,” Vector allows. “We… are not familiar with this… ‘Yusinduu,’ agent. It will be our first time in the district.”

“Right.” And just like that, a familiar lighting bolt clarity clears Tyr’s eyes. He pushes off from the doorway and waves Vector down the ramp with him, sweeping his jacket over the holsters at his hips. “Stay close, for now. If Hutts are reliable for anything, it’s an eye for profitable motives-”

Even that brief smile was well worth the diversion. They follow after the Commander, tucking their hands into their pockets.

“Do you think there is any relation, agent?”

Tyr begins to frown - a familiar brush of durasteel and the first gasp of rain-heavy air from the horizon. “I wouldn’t be surprised in the least,” he says.

His eyes skim the edges of the streets over Vector’s shoulders. “You know, I think you owe me a drink-” A cover for the agent’s sentiment to find a place to observe the local hum.

He claps a hand to Vector’s shoulder with a grin, eyes clear of the aged rhythms thrumming in battle-tested veins, no doubt. His fingers squeeze carefully around their shoulder and his voice drops for only a moment, “If I know anything about Hutta, it’s that we’re all good for someone… for the right price.” Stay close. Stay vigilant.

Tyr’s eyes face forward again, easily slipping through unfamiliar streets - enough heaviness in forward steps to keep their path clear and draw only the barest of curious glances. New faces on Hutt-controlled streets aren't uncommon. Nine wants them just under the radar. For now.

“Let’s see who we should be today, hm?”

#tyr deckard is an approximately 46 year old man and i am going to GET HIM #dot words #swtor fanfic #swtor fanfiction #sorry not sorry i. it popped into my brain and it was so abnoxiously adorable i. i couldn't resist #ch: tyr #imperial agent #vector hyllus #i'm still doomed the day they give me more than a passing flirt option bc these two never talked about it but oops. oops #god. i love them. i love this. this was so much fun #thank you random bolt of evening inspiration for silly silly words #the plot is really just vibes as backdrop for the silly words tbh

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paradoxcase · 12 days

Text

Gideon the Ninth audiobook reactions

I listened for a little over an hour, to the end of Chapter 3, and so far it's been great. It's a little odd making notes for what I think about it though - with the ebook I could visually skim over what I read before and take specific screenshots and everything, currently I've just been taking notes in a text editor and it's a little awkward. I had to look back at the pronunciation guide, which was also a little awkward, since the audiobooks are on my linux partition now and the Nook app is on Windows, so I keep having to reboot. I think I decided that for my next computer I'm not going to partition and will just run linux in VM

Anyway, for the name pronunciations:

Nonagesimus: Yeah, that pronunciation is going to bother me, but realistically I think she is going to be saying it so often that I'll just get used it it

Aiglamene: This was stressed on a syllable I didn't expect, but after consulting the pronunciation guide, that is how it was described and I was just wrong. Woe

Glaurica: Not how I pronounced the au. I note there's no instruction in the pronunciation guide about how to pronounce the au, the "phonetic" spelling also just says "au"

Palamedes: Also stressed on a syllable I didn't choose, but I knew full well that that was how the pronunciation guide said to pronounce it and was just in denial. I don't know if I'll get used to this one, we'll have to see

Character voice opinions:

I love Crux, he sounds kind of like Locked Tomb Gollum who doesn't double-mark plurals

I always headcanoned Gideon as having a low voice, probably because I have a low voice I want to see more representation for women with naturally low voices, this audiobook is not giving me that and I just have to accept it. Otherwise it's pretty good, although it's not always distinct from the narration

Aiglamene's voice is perfect

Harrow is also pretty good, but I'm curious if it will change when the main person she's interacting with is Ianthe, because right now it's very aristocratic and I feel like that would sort of overshadow Ianthe being even more aristocratic

The Glaurica voice was great

I'm not sure how I feel about Ortus's voice, but I guess I'll have to wait for the next book to reassess that first impression, since Ortus is now officially gone for the next 16 hours

Just regular stuff about the text that is hitting different a second time:

The Eighth House being described as "The Forgiving House" in the Dramatis Personae made me go "lol nope". Also it feels like a, uh, call-forward, I guess, to Mercy talking about forgiving John

The book opens in the year 10,000. I remember being Gideon and Harrow's age when we got to the year 2000, and we were all having endless arguments about whether the millennium actually began in 2000, or 2001. Why are none of the nerdy young people in this book getting really overinvested in the question of what is the actual first year of the myriad? I can see Harrow and Gideon having an incredibly violent argument about this and it would have been a great callback to some early aughts culture, which is something this book absolutely loves to do

Not really hitting different, but even after reading the whole thing I am still mystified by Gideon's apparent knowledge of Pluto's seasons

At some point it said "they chipped her". Did they put a tracking chip in Gideon, like you do with a cat?

Harrow says "I swear by my mother I have nothing on me" but Gideon was asking her to confirm that it was a fair fight, and it absolutely wasn't, haha

"My parents should have suffocated you" followed by "I'd like to see them try that now." Oof

Harrow saying "my parents have been waiting long enough" at the end of Chapter 2 hits a bit different when you already know at this point that they are dead and its their zombies that are waiting to be puppeted by Harrow. And everyone in the room knows this, she's not like pretending her parents are still alive for the benefit of some random nuns who aren't in the know

"In the Ninth everyone knew [cavaliers] were chosen for how many bones [they] could hump around" - I remember last time someone filled me in on this after Gideon's fight with Naberius and someone else said it was a spoiler, but it's actually stated quite plainly in Chapter 3

#the locked tomb #gideon the ninth

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motley-cunt · 2 months

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MOTLEY’S THEORY CONGLOMERATE

Disclaimers: Take all of this with a pile of salt, I am an insane person. Sweeney Todd is required reading. Long ass post.

The Rose Theory

The cover to bleeders looks like it’s shaped like the head of a red rose. Yes it a blood splatter, but it definitely looks weird right?

Red roses are commonly known as symbols of love and passion, while you could argue Sweeney Todd is a fucked up love story, I think the “passion” in the rose is more referring to a parallel between both Andy and Sweeney’s craft. Andy’s passion for music is basically a given, but what’s important here is how complete dedication to a craft could drive someone mad.

Andy’s matching his experience with music to Sweeney’s character ark in the play. So, passion for killing, passion for music, and that passion manifesting in a tool you can use to enact revenge is clear. Especially with the constant mention of the aspect in the Minidoc

Now the other rose I wanna mention is (what i believe to be) the black roses in the “”Sweeney Biersack”” photoshoot

Take this with a grain of salt but looking at what black roses symbolize,

That’s pretty fuckin Sweeney Todd isn’t it? Yeah? It’s basically fitting pieces into a puzzle at this point. It could be just to represent the gothic vibe of it all. But y’know, everything means something.

Judge Turpin, Villainy, and Sumerian Records

One of the blatant themes in Sweeney Todd is people in power taking advantage of the vulnerable. If you’ve seen the movie, the play, or just kind of skimmed through the plot summary you catch onto this. I think this aspect means more to Bleeders than I initially realized

I don’t think I’m alone in thinking that Sumerian Records treated BVB like shit, especially Andy like shit. I’m pretty sure someone’s out there consolidated all of the shit they’ve done to them better than I could, but I know I’m not an idiot for saying that a power struggle was probably apart of that. When BVB signed to Sumerian they were damn vulnerable. We all know the band was almost torn to shreds and buried into an early grave. A record label is a record label when you’re at that point.

Labels want money, they’re a company. But bad labels are greedy. Especially to passionate artists with extremely dedicated fanbases. Sumerian didn’t want to put in the work to support BVB as a label but liked the money they accumulated. It’s unfair, right? That’s the point. They suck. People in power taking advantage of the weak, those below feeding those up above.

Black veil brides has been fucked over a ton. Wouldn’t being fucked over so much make someone just a little bit angry? Make them wanna go apeshit? You can only be nice for so long, right? You beat someone to a pulp for long enough they’re gonna hit back. Hard. I think this is definitely a project about hitting back, not punching down, but hitting the fuck back. While I marked Sumerian as the “Turpin” in all of this, I theorize it’s the big “fuck you” that the band deserves to put into song. They are finally the villain in all this, but it’s important that they’re the villain with a purpose. Just like Sweeney is.

Directed Anger

Now that’s not to say black veil brides has just made sunshine and rainbows music before, there’s a lot of things that Andy is directly angry at. But some of the songs off of The mourning EP (Devil and Better Angels) seemed like it was the first mark in a clear minded and artistic recounting of a person that’s hurt him and the band. This isn’t God Bless you, where a drunk 18 year old is throwing paper balls at the Catholic Church (even though I still love that song), this is a man frustrated with being fucked over so much and he knows exactly who did it and what he’s gonna do about it. All of this frustration has a target, all of it has a reason. It’s not being *hindered* by anything. It’s a clear shot. Bleeders is just as much about Sweeney Todd as it is about the balloon of anger that’s been building up in this band.

Conclusion? Andy’s an artsy little bastard.

#none of these therories are possible without tumblr user The Nation Of Today Aka Maeve supporting my wild theories <3 #Bleeders Therories #black veil brides #andy posting #bvb #motley rambles #a lot #motley might be loosing it

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pancake-breakfast · 9 months

Text

Finishing this volume up earlier than usual isn't going to lessen the pain, but it might free me up to do a few more write-ups I need to do.

Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 10, Chapters 6-8 below.

Chapter 6: The Return

The return of what?? What is there to return??? Are they just gonna go back to the orphanage? The return of Livio?? I ask all these things like Nightow's not gonna answer that in the next however many pages.

Yeah, I imagine punches hurt a lot more when YOU DON'T HAVE ANY SKIN.

Ugh, Vash just... standing there, listening to Wolfwood beat the shit out of Razlo. I'm not sure what he's thinking or feeling, but I'm not sure I want to know.

I like Livio... but I think I'd be ok with Razlo never being whole again.

Vash.... Wolfwood, stop punching and go hug your mans or something. He's not doing so well.

Oh, Raz. Chapel wouldn't help you if he could. He never cared enough about you for that.

Dear lord, that's not a healthy thing to do, Wolfwood. I realize you don't have any control over it, but maybe it's time to just stop for a bit. (Side note: props to Nightow for not having his characters just arbitrarily coughing up blood all the time. Really increases the impact when they finally do.)

THE FUCK. DON'T DOWN THE LAST VIAL. YOU'RE JUST SPEEDING UP THE INEVITABLE.

Gods, Raz regenerates quickly.

Huh, his living minions have names, and he knows them. I wonder if the one he turned into chaff had a name.

I dunno if Vash is gonna tolerate this.

Yeah, Vash says no. Kicks for you. He'll allow Wolfwood to finish his business with Raz because he knows this is important to Wolfwood, but if he doesn't get to interfere, then neither does anyone else.

In this moment, I fully believe Vash will kill them if they don't lay off. That said, I'm not sure they're fully human and not some sort of construct.

Raz is doing a great job talking despite not having lips. *mumbles something indistinct about episode 12 of Stampede*

Huh???

LIVIO!!! My boi is here to save his big bro!

Gods, I love these panels. I love how they're set up like two different characters.

Wolfwood knows something's up.

Where the hell did the other Punisher come from? That's Chapel's Punisher. Isn't he dead??

DAMMIT, FUCK THIS GUY SO HARD WITH A *redacted* RIGHT IN THE *redacted* UNTIL HE *redacted* AND *redacted, AND THEN *redacted* HIS *redacted* WITH A *redacted* UNTIL IT LOOKS LIKE SWISS CHEESE!!! FUUUUUUUCCCCKKK!!!!

Ugh, I told you, Raz. I'm sorry, my guy. I know how much it sucks to find out someone you thought was there to take care of you and who you thought valued your life only ever saw you as a pawn toward a different end.

What's more, Raz, is I just skimmed back and what you probably thought was a half-hearted attempt by Wolfwood to smack you away from himself in fear probably just saved your life.

Finish that bastard off. Please. Make sure he doesn't get up again. Make sure he never hurts anyone else again. Finish what your brother started.

Honestly, Nightow could have put absolutely no dialogue on these panels and I'd still be able to hear Raz scream.

Nah, scale it back, Razlo. I know you don't know the meaning of the words, but to quote Stampede Wolfwood, he's not the one who hurt you.

Freaking Livio, man. (affectionate, full of admiration)

Listen to him, Raz. You exist to protect him. If he says you're done, you're done.

Yes. If it weren't for you, Livio would be dead. But the fight is over. It's time to end this, Razlo.

There's something very important about apologizing to yourself for the unhealthy and/or dangerous coping mechanisms you forced yourself to build up... and in forgiving yourself for for them, too.

Ah, the little peons have gone passive now that their master has receded.

Freaking Wolfwood took this time to find and light another of his terribly crushed cigarettes. Freaking addict.

Chapter 7: Wolfwood

No no no no. I know where this chapter goes. I'm not ready.

For the record, I'm just gonna play take a little hand by yoko kanno on repeat the whole time I read this chapter. It's literally been stuck in my head since I got hit with the volume's feels last night, so I'm gonna just ride it out.

"Sleep on a proper bed as much as you can." This is such a good wish. If one has ever been poor enough not to have a proper bed for any length of time, they get it. It's a wish for the luxury of simple comforts, like wishing for someone to have a full stomach or clean clothes.

He thought he was joining a good organization, a group that would help others. He was just a child.

TBH, he looks younger here than he looks in some of the other flashbacks. Here, he looks like he's eight, but in some of the others, he looks like he's 12-14.

We don't have time for the ark now, Brad! And by "time," I mean "emotional energy for whatever those crazies intend to do next." Make 'em go away!

Vash opens the door for the people from the orphanage to come out... but we don't see his face. That feels ominous. I wonder if he's managing one of his fake smiles at this point, or if he's not even bothering for once. (I say "for once," but it feels like his mask falls a lot more these days than it used to.)

Yyyyeah, it might have been a good idea to clean up some of the bodies first. Or let the kids out through the back or something.

*sigh* Vash just wanted to give them some time together.

Man, Livio looks wrecked. Not physically. Emotionally.

Ah, Brad dropped Vash off. That explains that. I remember the ship and I remember thinking it looked like one of Home's vessels, but I wasn't sure if Vash had driven it or what. I like to imagine Vash just jumped out of it from way too high up.

Heh. Wolfwood knows he can't fool Miss Melanie, but he's still trying to protect the kids. Or... maybe he's trying to protect himself. He doesn't want them to see him like this, to think of him like this.

Honestly, given how young some of these kids were, it's a wonder so many of them remember him.

Vash, still holding out hope that maybe, just maybe, they can save him.

Nicholas Dickolas Wolfwood! You're only giving Vash that coin and saying, "This is who I really am," and all that bullshit because you're trying to make your passing easier on Vash, to drive him away so it maybe hurts him less. But you are too late for that. Idiot. He LOVES YOU. Deeply. It doesn't matter if or even need to be romantic. HE LOVES YOU.

LOL, Livio. Bless this man. Also maybe get him a shirt.

*sigh* Klutz.

Damn Nightow for adding this comic relief here. I know it's a lie.

*more sighing* Aaaaand there's the bottle.

Freaking couch....

Gods. Remember... remember waaaaay back when they first met, and Wolfwood went out of his way to make Vash smile? He truly loves Vash's smile. But there's no way in hell Vash could give him a genuine one right now, and that's the smile Wolfwood truly loves.

Well... dammit, Wolfwood would of course be thinking of that, too. Here I thought I was being all smart about the callback, but Nightow just spelled it out for us.

Vash is about to have a full breakdown here. Usually, it's Wolfwood praying, but this time, it's Vash. He doesn't want apologies. He just... he just wants this person who means so much to him to be here. To keep being here. For as long as possible.

Them throwing ticker tape, just like when he left before. Just like you would for a celebration, like a wedding. You... you know Stampede's opening Tombi references this, too??

Heh. Six years, and they saved all this for when he came back. He was well-loved.

Brad's incensed face in the background.

Miss Melanie went against Wolfwood's request... but she's worked with kids a lot. Desperate, hurt kids. Kids who've had to grow up before their time even if they don't show it on the outside the way Wolfwood does. She knows they're smarter than most give them credit for. And she knows some part of Wolfwood's heart needs this. He needs to know that in spite of everything, he's still loved, even by them.

Wolfwood doesn't strike me as much of a crier, unlike Vash. But... hey, now's as good a time as any, huh?

The iron bell in the tower is ringing.

Yeah. Yeah, I knew this would be the next page.

Livio knows. Vash knows. Vash can't hold it in anymore.

Aaaand the ark is here. This is going to go very, very poorly for someone.

Chapter 8: Final Parting

I'd guess Livio's about to have a very different relationship with the ark than he had before.

Ah, the ark is either not as close as the final page of the last chapter made it seem, or it passed them by for now.

Vash is stress cooking.

Livio, you moron. What did you think was happening??

Side note: I like how Livio's hair has gone from, "I am dead inside and don't care about anything," to something that's almost quirky and childlike.

This is the face of someone who's checked the hell out for the foreseeable future.

TBH, it's probably a good thing Livio clarified his "why." If he hadn't, I dunno if Vash would have been able to stay calm. He's doing his best right now, even if he's checked out.

Yeah, they better animate this in Stampede. They've already set it up to hit like a runaway train.

Gods, I wish it wasn't a billion degrees. I could really go for some tea right now. Hot tea. Coping tea.

Uhh, what happened to Vash's hair?? "But when" is right!

Ah, he took out his grief on the ark. Well, that explains why that big-ass ship is somehow missing.

WTH is so fucking funny, Knives?? Your brother is dying.

Ah, brief return of I-Hate-My-Life Livio hair. Man, this guy talks with his hair. I love it. He really does feel bad about all this now. This isn't what he wanted. Like Wolfwood at the beginning of the story, he just didn't know he could have it any other way.

Vash is right. Eat.

Heh. Vash's little smile as Livio starts eating. Livio's not Wolfwood, but he's someone Wolfwood cared deeply about, and it seems like some part of Vash is willing to accept that, despite everything, a friend of Wolfwood's is a friend of his, especially when said friend is so eager to take up Wolfwood's mantle.

Side note: it amuses me that Livio's left his shredded sleeves on. Like, my boi, your whole shirt is missing. You can probably take those off, too.

This panel. It feels like it snuck in from a completely different manga.

Heh. Vash remembering eating with Wolfwood like this.

Oh, my boi Livio. Sobbing through his food. I imagine Vash is already all cried out for now.

They're just gonna eat their sorrows away. Silverware optional. This is a hand salad now.

LOL, yeah... I had a feeling they were gonna overeat.

Hells, I don't think Livio could forget Wolfwood if he wanted to. But I get the gesture. Vash is reminding Livio that Wolfwood died to save him. And Livio's picking up what he's putting down.

Mm, Razlo is the one used to carrying Punishers, and even he didn't cart around his own. BTW, what happened to those guys?

It's definitely a fitting tombstone.

Props to all y'all who read this the first time in book form and had to turn that last page to see a full frontal of Wolfwood's blow-up doll on the couch at the end. I'm sure that's what y'all wanted to see when you were still up to your eyes in The Feels.